"'Hi, this is Kat." "Leave a message and I'll call you back. '" "'Hi, Kat." "This is Nick Mercer." "'Sorry I didn't get back to you last night but I got your messages." "'All seven of them." "'I know you're nervous, Kat, but this is what I get paid for." "'I'm running late so I sent a messenger to pick up my ticket." "'Kat, stop worrying." "'Your ex-fiancé will wish he never left you 'and your family will think we're in love." "'Trust me." "I'll see you at the airport." "Can't wait to meet you. '" "So sorry." "I wasn't quite ready." "It's a plane ticket." "For a date." "My date." "For my sister's wedding, in London." "You need to let go." "You're gonna have to help me." "'... 356 to London Heathrow, 'all remaining passengers please make your way... '" "Harry, I'm not working, I'm going to my sister's wedding." "Customer service will have to survive without me." "But Kat, we've had three delays and two reps call in sick." "And a 2505 on the 8:20 CPT to LGW." "And there's this guy on line two who gut stuck with in-laws because we couldn't get him out of Heathrow." "I'd love to help you, sincerely, but I haven't seen my family in two years and my flight leaves in 15 minutes." "Come on, Kat." "Please, I'm begging you." "Bump the 14:14 to the upper on 16:10." "What about line two?" "Check my bags." "I understand, you want your family to see you the way you see yourself, or would, if you didn't feel so victimized by them." "Hello!" "We regret that you were inconvenienced." "Unfortunately, we are not liable." "But just this once I'll refund your ticket and credit you 10,000 frequent flyer miles." "Thank you for calling Virgin Atlantic." "Your first trip?" "My sister's getting married and the best man is my ex." "If I chicken out, I wanna know where the exits are." "I'm not a knuckler, I fly all the time." "The reason I can't feel my legs is that any second my date is gonna sit down in 3B and I need him to look really good today." "Hello, 3B." "Thank you." "Hey." "Kat." "Let's sit." "I'm glad you found it OK." "The airport..." "The plane, I mean." "I'm sorry we couldn't leave sooner." "I know you wanted to get settled before the party." "Work must be crazy." "Oh, I should warn you." "You know those families where everyone's out of their mind but they're your family so you love them?" "Mine's not like that." "I love my dad." "But since he's my stepdad, he's technically not family." "He's more like a hostage." "'Ladies and gentlemen, 'we will shortly be arriving at London Heathrow." "'On arrival, please remain seated 'until the seat belt sign has been switched off." "'Local time is 4:22pm 'and the temperature is a warm 21... '" "Good morning." "'That's 72 degrees Fahrenheit." "'We would like to thank you for flying with us today 'and look forward to seeing you again soon. '" "Oh." "Nick, please tell me you're not wearing that tonight." "I am." "It's no big deal really, it just looks like a tailor made your tie out of my dress." "Don't get me wrong - matching's fine." "It's matchy-matchy you wanna look out for." " We look like we're trying too hard." " Exactly." "I want us to look like we fit but not like we're trying to look like we fit." "Let me teach you a trick." "If you look people in the eye, they'll never notice what you're wearing." "There's no way I'm showing up in his and her outfits so if you're gonna wear that tie, I have to change my dress." "Driver, will you please pull over somewhere?" "I'm sorry." "I promise this is the last one." "You must think..." "Who knows what you think?" "I know how important this is for you." "But remember, you're a beautiful woman and you've got everything going for you." "Don't patronize me." "I feel like crap but I wanna look hot doing it." "Mission accomplished." "Really?" "Don't get too attached." "I prefer the red one." "I'll let her know." "Hmm..." ""Hmm, nice dress," or "Hmm..." ""Gorgeous." "I was insane to let you go"?" "Well, I'd shag you." "If that's all right with you?" "I don't know if I can do this." "Well, you can never be sure of anything but we still have to go inside." " Aunt Bea!" " Dear girl." "This should have been you getting married." "You know, you didn't have to return the gravy boat." "And to think Jeffrey is the best man." "Have you met Nick?" " How do you do?" " Oh." "Charming." "And what do you do?" "Excuse us." "What a nightmare." "OK, we need a story." "You're a therapist, we just started dating and you're crazy about me." "Count it. 6,000 even." " Oh, I trust you." " No." "Count it." "All right." "I'll cover expenses but if you want to be intimate, we talk money first." "That won't be an issue." "I find the idea of sex for money morally repugnant." "I'm sorry." "No offense." "Do me a favor, quit apologizing." "If you look at this as a business transaction, maybe you won't feel compelled to keep saying sorry." "I'm sorry." "It's also really annoying." "Sorry." " Sorry." " Pussy Kat!" "What happened to you?" " Pull over for a quickie?" " Mom, this is so not the time to be yourself." "And who might this be?" "Hi." "I'm the new guy." "It's great to meet you." "Lovely." "This is a marathon, not a sprint." "We've got welcome cocktails today then tomorrow's Young People In The Park and Stags And Hens." "Friday's the picnic, then the rehearsal dinner and since you have left no margin for jetlag," "I need you to hydrate." " Dad." " My darling." " Meet Nick." " Professor Ellis." " How do you do?" " Kat?" " Kat!" "Oooh!" "I'm getting married!" "Oh, Kitty!" " Hey!" "Oh, I missed you so much." "Gosh, who's the hunky, huh?" "Nice." "There you are!" "Get over here!" "At times like these, I find a good, stiff drink helps." " Can I get you a refill, sir?" " Very kind of you." "Where did you find him?" "Thank you." "Yellow Pages." "Hello!" "Sweet Jesus." "Who gave that woman an amp?" "Hello." "Hello?" "Oh." "Wonderful." "It's finally working." "Does everybody have a drink?" "Because I am going to say a few words." "Welcome, friends and family..." "I'm..." "Victor and I are so happy that you're here to celebrate with us as we welcome Edward and the Fletcher-Wootens into our family." "We always thought that we would marry off Kat first." "We had good reason to hope because she was so popular with the boys at school and we came pretty close once, but, as you all know, that crashed and burned." "Luckily, we were able to get the deposit back, so here we are again..." "To the bride and groom." "Oh." "Yes." "Yes." "Well, back to the bride and groom to be." "Um..." "Edward, we are so glad that you fell in love with the girl next door." "Our Amy." "Congratulations, babies." "Congratulations." "Jeffrey." "Hello." "Kat-mandu." "Wow, you look gorgeous." "Gorgeous." "Oh, my God!" "Oh, my God!" "Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God!" "Top Kat!" "Ooooh!" "Where the bloody hell have you been?" "I have gynecologists that call more often." " You have more than one?" " I play them off against each other." "Hello, arsehole." "Since you dumped my cousin brutally, you won't mind if I steal her away, will you?" "Thanks." " You didn't have to do that." " I wasn't saving you from him," "I was saving you from yourself." "You, my love, are too bloody nice." "I've never seen so many beautiful women in one room." "Did he bring a date?" "Darling, why waste time on that horse's arse when Mr. Tie Me Up, Tie Me Down is waiting for you over there?" " What does he do?" " He's a therapist." " The perils of paranoia." " Yes." "Oh, God." "I think I've just come." "Thank you." "Can I have that?" "Hm." "Thank you." "You know what I love about all this, Kat?" "There's finally a reason for the world to revolve around you?" "Exactly." " There you are." " How's the future missus?" "I'm perfect, I'm all ginny." "Thanks, Snufflepop." "Mmm!" "Mm-mm-mm!" "Wow!" "Am I not the luckiest bastard on earth?" "Aw!" "Well, I'll dance to that." " Oh!" " Oh, Jesus!" "That's what he gets for not taking dance lessons until two days before the wedding." "Who's ever heard of dance lessons for a wedding?" "Just about everyone." "You are taking the piss?" "We'll go with you." "I don't even know you, hunky dunky, and I love you already." "Dance lessons?" "Hm." "Right." " Hey." " Oh." "Hello." "Weddings are a celebration of love and commitment... in Utopia." "In the real world they're an excuse to drink excessively and say things you shouldn't." " A philosopher, huh?" " Well, shrink." " Crikey!" " What?" " No, nothing." " No, tell me." "Well, you Yanks and your therapy, it's a load of touchy-feely mumbo jumbo." "Spilling your guts to a total stranger, it's not natural." "Oh, God." "It's just..." "There's this girl that I care for..." "Well, I suppose you could say I love her." "The bugger is, she's here with some other guy." "There you are." "Hey, Kat." "Hey, Kat." "Oh, hey, yourself." "I see you met my ex." " I was just telling him how we met." " Mm." " The Knicks game." " Oh, yes." "Yeah..." "Oh." "You hate sport." " I hate cricket." " Right, yes." "Well, I should go and... go." "He looks miserable." " What were you talking about?" " He seems a little drunk but I think he's still crazy about you." " Do I know you from somewhere?" " No." "What did he say?" "You don't..." "You don't think he wants me back?" "Are you OK?" " Here we are." " Thank God!" " Oh!" " Thanks, Mom." " There you are, darling." " Thanks, Dad." "God!" " Thanks again for having me." " Don't be silly." "It's wonderful to meet you." "Although technically, I never knew you existed." " Come on, Bunny." " I love surprises." "Where's Nick sleeping?" "My mother has this rule about sharing when there's no ring involved..." " Don't be silly." " What?" "I am not as small-town as my daughter seems to think." "Sorry about this." "I went through a painfully earnest floral phase." "Air Supply?" "Oh." "My parents had a German exchange student a few years back." "He must have left it here." "Everyone knows their greatest hits." "Some of their lesser-known ballads are surprisingly poignant." "Is that an old habit from ballet class or from a lifetime of walking on eggshells?" "I never took ballet." "How'd you know that was me?" "I have a friend at the magazine." "So much for anonymity." "Go ahead, take a look." "It's part of the package." "I'm sorry, I'm just a little nervous." "I never thought anything like this could happen to me." "This happened to you?" "It happened in the sense that I picked up the phone, tracked you down, flew you over her and gave you $6,000." " Will you grab my shampoo, please?" " Shampoo!" "Got it." "The part where you were a sexual surrogate and then started to... branch out, is..." "Is that really how it happened?" "The real story - my mother was a hippie, and a stripper." "She was insanely inappropriate with me, she washed her lingerie in my bath water while I was still in it." "Oh." "So as an adult, I needed to find ways to experience intimacy and sex" " but with rules that couldn't be violated." " Wow." "I'm just screwing with you." "You shit." "OK, this part." "You say, and I quote," ""Every woman has the exact love life she wants. "" "That seems a broad generalization..." "Oh!" "Oh." "Do you honestly believe that I want to be single and miserable?" "Do you think that I want to be hung up on some guy who led me on for years and out of the blue shattered my heart?" "First of all, there's no such thing as out of the blue." "And second of all, yeah." " What?" " When you're ready to let go, to be un-single and un-miserable, you will." "Till then..." "So when you were talking to Jeffrey before, how did he sound?" "Like a harmless, self-absorbed toolbox." "Seriously." "He sounded tormented." "Tormented?" "How?" "Like he's... jealous that I'm here with someone else, or like... he regrets throwing away our life together?" "It's just that... this hasn't really turned out the way that I thought it would." "Hey, Nick." "Oh-oh-oh!" "He seems more mature." "Run, you fat tart!" "Come on." "Come on, throw it." "Throw it!" " Well played, darling." " Ed!" "What?" " Are you ready, TJ?" " Bugger off." "All right, batter, batter." " Move back." " Yeah." "Come on, Kat." " You're up, Kat." " # I'll be waiting... #" "Go, Kat." "Be nice to me, Jeffrey." " Out!" " Yes!" "Lose the game." "No!" " Come on!" " Edward." "Come on!" "Come on, you sexy little monkey." "Come on!" " You're supposed to be helping." " Oh, trust me." "I am." "What's with the socks?" "It's a golf-themed bachelorette." "Have you ever done a wedding before?" "No, but I have done funerals." "An escort at a funeral?" "Someone's dead." "Yeah, imagine facing that alone." "Ah." "Catch." "Make sure he stays on the right side of the road." " Which is, of course, the left." " That's right." "So, are you ever attracted to your clients?" "I know you're curious about my business but I really can't discuss other clients." "Come on!" "How many of them want to sleep with you?" "You know, I swear it's not about the sex." "It's about understanding what people need." "Please!" "You're like the Yoda of escorts." "Getting you on the phone was harder than getting into college." " No, I don't play games." "No gimmicks." " Mm-hm." "It's much more..." "Subtle?" "It's not about me." "It's about you." "Show me." "Come on." "Hmm..." "What's holding me back?" "I think it's the words "morally repugnant"." "Show me." "Close your eyes." "Close your eyes." "Close your eyes." "You're safe, you can relax." "I'm not gonna kiss you." "He's gonna be so sorry he lost you." "So, stop worrying." "Forget the past." "Forget the pain." "And remember... what an incredible woman you are." "If you do that, he'll realize what he lost." "Holy crap!" "You're worth every penny." " You should get going." " Mm-hm." "OK, Yoda." "To Amy!" "I thought you might need this." "Silly me." "Where was my head?" " Bye." " Listen, why don't you stay" " and have a little fiery drink with us, eh?" " Uh..." " It's fine." " Come on." "You know you want to!" " Oh, I can see why." " You're lovely." "Isn't he lovely?" "Have you smelt him?" "He smells lovely!" "Can you believe Kat gets to shag this guy?" "No, really, you should send God a bottle of wine or a quiche or something." "Look at those buns." "Fresh from the bakery." "It must feel great getting paid just for being you." " Who says I'm being me?" " Excuse me." "Amy, thank you for granting me a rare glimpse into a timeless female ritual." "Here's to the husbands who've won you, the losers who've lost you and the lucky bastards who've yet to meet you." "And to the cock in the henhouse." "I can't believe you found him first." "I am so depressed." "Will somebody buy my hoo-hah a drink?" "You remember when we took the girls hiking in the Lake District?" " No." " You do!" "Blistering heat in the morning, rained all afternoon." "No." "You backed your car over a copper's bicycle." " Sorry, no." " The Rat And Gherkin." " Splendid local scrumpy." " Mm." "Amy wore that little bikini thing." "But somehow it was Kat that got stung by nettles." "Kat never said a word until Amy caught her scratching her arse." "Then you rubbed it with a dock leaf to bring down the swelling." "Yeah, I remember it." "I didn't deserve her back then." "And you do now?" "What is his problem?" " What?" " There's something about him I don't like." "He's less than 90 per cent body fat and he's shagging your ex." "No, that is not it." "Look at him, he's walking around all American, like he owns the place." "Oh, no!" "Come on, this is your last chance." "Woody?" " Not yet, but it's getting there!" " It's getting there!" "Oh, my God!" "What are you doing here?" "I thought you were in San Francisco, or was it Nepal?" "Close." "Sydney." "But it turns out that I missed the rain." "Did Kat tell you that she dumped you because of your funky breath?" "She's drunk." "But I didn't..." "I didn't really dump you." "Right?" "Hard." "But it was understandable, you were one of the hottest girls in school." "And we know that Kat was one of the hottest expats in school because she was voted Best Eyes and Brightest Smile and the Most Likely To Age Well." "You're my half-sister but I whole love you." "How about you get my half-sister a Seventh Hole?" " Tequila." "Tequila." " Sure." "Are you all right?" "I don't know if I can do this." "The Seventh Hole?" "No!" "The wedding." "I shouldn't be allowed to get married." "I shouldn't." "What are you talking about?" "TJ!" "Come on!" "Come on!" "What's wrong with Jeffrey?" "As if I would sleep with a stripper!" "I'm about to get married." "You have to..." "It's been my experience that a man in love doesn't want a prostitute." "Eddie, you did the right thing." "How do you know so much... about so much?" "I'm a hooker." "I like that." "I just don't feel very well." "I'm gonna go." "Give us a kiss." " Ladies..." " How much do you rock, TJ?" "...that was a top night." "Top night!" "She's getting married!" "Are you OK?" "Ooh!" "Ow!" " Morning." " Morning." "Ahoy, there!" "Hi, Dad." "I don't know what works for you but I brought you some black coffee and some stale crackers, egg and cheese sandwich and a Bloody Mary." "That's very sweet of you." "But I need to ask you something." "What happened last night?" "Nothing." "Thanks." " Is this for last night?" " No!" "How could it be?" "Nothing happened." "If I was gonna charge you, I said I'd tell you first." "I didn't want you to think that I was expecting anything for free or that I was expecting anything at all." "I mean, obviously I was expecting something or else I wouldn't have stopped at that ATM." "Just so you know, you're 300 short." "Wait, you're telling me that if something happened last night," "I'd have to pay you $1,700?" "That's a down payment on a Ford Focus." "Not dollars, pounds." "Besides, it includes, you know..." "That's the extra 300." "Are you a boatsman, son?" "I am now, sir." "I'm glad someone's making use of her at last." "The boat, I mean." ""To defile. " Four letters." " Good morning, Daddy." " Ah." " What if I didn't want you to do that to me?" " The 300's for you doing it to me." "If anything had happened, it would have been one of the highlights, for you." " But nothing did." " That's why you get to keep your money." "The wedding dance is the most important dance moment in a person's life." "A room full of friends and family, watching, smiling, betting on how long the marriage will last." "All you'll have is each other and whatever skills you acquire today." "And pair off." "Now, your left foot." "Her right foot." "Good." "And we'll try to glide across the floor." "Come a little bit closer together." "Moving." "Trying to turn." "What's the matter, Nick?" "Two left feet?" "Oh!" "When I told you I'd never done a wedding before, it wasn't because I'd never been asked." "I'd just never said yes." "Why'd you say yes to me?" "There was something in your voice on the phone that day." "Desperation?" "I think it was hope." "Get a move on, you lovebirds." "I'm getting married in the morning." " Ah, hello, Bambi." " Darling, please don't do that." "Oh, wow." "That's a big bed." "You know what pisses me off?" "I've been spilling my guts all weekend and I don't know anything about you." "I'm allergic to fabric softener." "I'm majoring in comparative literature at Brown." "I hate anchovies." "I think I'd miss you even if we'd never met." "Come on!" "I'm a little concerned..." "I'm just..." "It makes me nervous..." "You know, I might just call you." "But if I did, I would lose, because my hand is complete shite." "Ohhh." " I'm in." " Come on." "There's gotta be something wrong with him." "I bet his thingy bends, doesn't it?" "Got a little kink in it." "Oh, no, don't tell me." "It's bloody perfect." "I'm going to see you." "Looky, looky here." "A full house." "Oh-ho-ho!" "Has anyone seen my future wife?" "She'll kill me if I don't serve her first." "Have you guys ever had a real honest-to-God fight, ever?" " Yes, of course." " Yeah, right." "Well, apparently, makeup sex is the best kind." "Not that I'm ever going to find out." "Give me that!" " Come on!" " No, no!" " Don't!" " Come on!" "You seem to have a way with women." "Why don't you go and rustle up the bride?" "Get her to join the party." "Why are you bringing this up now?" "I love Ed." " What do you want from me?" " I want you to tell me..." "Blue shirt or... white shirt for the, er, rehearsal dinner?" "Sorry to interrupt." "Your dad sent me." "What for?" "To make sure you're OK." "Kat, could I have a word?" "It'll only take a moment." "Let me think." "You stole seven years of her life with your bullshit and your charm and now you'd like just a moment?" "Sure." "Go right ahead." "Thanks for the solidarity, Mum, but next time a little less information." "Do you believe a place has a memory?" "Even before Ed and I started dating, we all used to come up here in the summer and spend weekends." "God, I hope it doesn't remember everything." "No matter how certain one is of one's position of what one should or shouldn't do, one sometimes discovers that one is not as one would have hoped one would have been." " What exactly are you trying to say?" " I'm sorry." "Look, I feel like I need to tell you something." " You're not even listening." " I'm sorry." "I'll be back in a minute." "Hey, is everything OK?" "Yeah." "Yeah." "Anchovy, Nick?" "I remember the day I met Kat." "It was in New York." "I'd been seeing Bunny for a few months and she finally trusted me enough to meet her kid." "So I'm over at her place and in walks this little monster." "That was it." "I was a goner." "That was the day I became a dad." "You know, Nick, you think it's going to get easier as they get older, that you're going to worry about them less." "Or that you're going to trust the world more." "But that's just not how it happens." "This may not make much sense to you, sir, but I'd like to ask your permission to date your daughter." "I thought you already were." " I blame..." "I blame Tony Peepants." " No." "Let's have the story." "Kat, come on." " No." " I have to initiate Nick into our family." "I blame Tony for why my two girls just don't seem to be able to get along." "Don't deny it." "You barely tolerate each other." "Come on." "It's true." "The only thing you've got in common is you're both attracted to me." "It started after we moved here." "My two girls got into a fight over Tony Peepants and have never made up since." "Apparently, Kat and I were inseparable." "If Kat ate a banana, Amy threw it up." "If Amy threw it up, Kat ate it." "So we were eating and throwing up together in harmony until Tony walked me home from school one day." "He was my first boyfriend." "Tony ignored Kat because he wanted to play with me." "Anyway, the point of the story is that Tony ended up with a chair in his face." "It was plastic and child-sized." " As I recall, there were stitches involved." " Come on, Bunny, 15 stitches." "So is that when he peed in his pants?" "He cried a lot, but there was no peeing." "So what's with the nickname?" "I have absolutely no idea." "Let me get some more wine." "Would you marry me if I asked?" "That was a yes." "Did you see that?" "And you know, I thought perhaps you..." "Bollocks." "Sorry." "I had no idea this would be so difficult." "I just feel like I owe you an explanation." "Relax, relax." "It's fine." "I promise." "And I should probably admit that..." "I brought Nick with me to torture you, slowly, for the entire weekend." "But then, I don't know, something happened and now..." "I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings but I'm just sick of you and me." "Of our whole story, so come on, let's just go upstairs and eat some tiramisu." "I slept with your sister." " I'm sorry?" " Well, I shagged Amy, two years ago." "That's why I broke it off with you." "And then after you left, sod it, we kept at it like rabbits, until we both realized it was absolutely mad and, obviously, morally wrong." "And then that was it." "But last Christmas, when Ed proposed," "I realized..." "I'm in love with her." "Good Lord, say something, please." "Oh, my God, he's told you, hasn't he?" " You knew?" " Kat, I'm so sorry." "I'm so..." "Kat." "Kat, please." "Kat, please don't say anything." "I can't believe you told her." "What's going on?" "Nothing." "It doesn't look like nothing." "Now is not the time to catch on, Ed." "OK." "Good." "Leave me alone." "You knew and you didn't tell me." " Wait up." " I can't believe I trusted you." "Come on." "You've got to stop running." " How could you not have told me?" " What did you expect me to say?" "You let me make a fool of myself." "You lied to me, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised because that's what you do." "That's who you are." "You're a liar." "You're judging me?" "That's a good one." "You're going to point a finger at me, the guy that you hired to pretend to be your boyfriend?" "You're right." "I was so desperate to make everyone believe that I was happy that I paid $6,000 for a lie." "And, at the end of the day, the only one who ended up falling for it was me." "I wish I could say it was worth it." "Go ahead, Kat, hate me." "I think you're running out of steam on this whole Jeffrey thing anyhow." "Maybe now you'll be able to hold on to this long enough to ruin your next relationship." " Nick." " I'm just checking into a hotel." "Don't be ridiculous." "It's late." "Take the car." "Actually, the boathouse is empty." "Look, I don't know what's going on with you two but I'm sure you'll work it out." "You couldn't be more perfect if she'd picked you out of a catalog." "Thanks, Ed." "Hey." "Hey." "I just..." "I wanted to say thank you for not outing me in front of Ed." "I want to tell him, just not the night before our wedding." "You know, with these things, timing is everything." "You're right." "You should time it right, so that when he hears that you repeatedly screwed his best friend, he won't feel like the world is collapsing and there's no escape because you tricked him into marrying you." " Kat..." " Don't worry." "Your wedding will be perfect." "Tomorrow I'll say all the right things and you'll deal with Ed when you're ready." "But right now, tonight, I'm not going to pretend it's OK." "And that's your first flight out?" " All right, thanks." " # In Paris and Rome" " I'm OK." " # Someone else's life" "I don't believe you." "I'm fine, really." "Nothing a bottle of Jack and a straight razor couldn't fix." "Anyway, it doesn't matter." "It's Amy's day." "Get in the car, darling." "No, no." "Smile." "Hello." "I've been looking for you." "So, why did you let him go?" " It's complicated, Dad." " Right." "It probably wouldn't have worked out anyway, huh?" "I remember reading a fascinating article in the New York Times Magazine once, where this guy said," ""Every woman has the exact love life she wants. "" "You know what?" "I agree with him." "But I refuse to believe that this is what you want, Kat." "Ever since you were little, you've always worried about what other people think." "Now, come on." "What do you think?" "Is he the guy for you?" "Then go and get him." "Hello, darling." "Your mother said you wanted to have a quick word." "No, no, no, I..." "There's something you should know before you marry me." "What is it?" "I wanted to tell you but I was afraid you'd never forgive me and I just..." "I love you so much." "I'm sorry." "I knew you were seeing someone else when we finally got together, but not Jeffrey." "Does Kat know?" "Jeffrey told her last night." "Excuse me." "Ed?" "Ed..." "Calm down, Ed." "Ed!" "TJ!" "Ah!" "Ed, calm down!" "It's all sorted!" "She wants you!" "I've given up!" "What's the problem?" "You back-stabbing weasel!" "That's not fair." "It was before you guys were even dating." "But you were engaged to her sister." "Ed, calm down!" "We can talk about this like civilized human beings." "I look like a total wanker, don't I?" "Yeah, kind of." "Get in the car, Ed." "He's halfway to France by now." "Whoa!" "I trust you've enjoyed your trip to England." "Yeah, it was fantastic." "Thanks, Eddie." "You know, I felt sorry for you last night." "I was just sitting there like some smug arse, thinking, "Aren't I a lucky sod?"" "I forgave her when I thought it was just some random bloke." "But not Jeffrey." "I've had her up on a pedestal ever since... ever since I put her up there." "What a mess I've made, huh?" "I'm so sorry." "The hardest thing's loving someone and then having the courage to let them love you back." "But if you know her shit and she knows yours and at the end of the day, you still would rather give up than try... nothing's ever gonna be worth it." "Maybe think about it this way." "You go back, you get to spend the rest of your life having really great makeup sex." " Ed?" " Must run!" "Hi." "Hi." "Last night, when we were fighting, I thought this was over." "And I was going to leave you alone and just take off but..." "Then I realized I'd rather fight with you than make love with anyone else." " I should get going." " What?" "No, you can't." "I have to." "I'm the best man." "Let's do it." "Ed, there's no one in the world who knows how to love my baby sister better than you." "Be good to one another." "To Amy and Ed." "Amy and Ed." "Ripped by:" "SkyFury"