"( dog thinking ) Enough of this cold weather." "I say, this year we spend Christmas someplace warm and sunny." "Whoa-ho-ho." "Now that's what I call holiday stylin'." "Santa elves ain't got nothing on old Zeus Bannister." "Boom." "Shebang." "What am I thinking?" "We're going to California." "I'm going to sweat my fur off in this thing." "Bathing suit, check." "Backup bathing suit, check." "T-shirt, check." "Red thing, check." "California, here I come." "Bright sun, beautiful beaches, mixed with a little Malibu Christmas spirit." "What more can you ask for?" "Whoo-hoo!" "( phone ringing )" "Can someone get that?" "( sighs ) A canine's work is never done." "Woman:" "Hello?" " ( panting on phone )" " George?" "Is that you?" "( whines )" "George, did you have that shrimp toast" " from that Chinese restaurant?" " ( barks )" "I don't even go there anymore." "Woman:" "Oh, honey." "You sound horrible." "Zeus:" "It's Zeus, Grandma." "What, you don't speak dog?" "Oh-- um, well, anyway." "I just wanted to call and wish you both bon voyage to sunny California." "Surfer dude!" "Yeah." "Well, have a great time, a safe trip, okay?" "And give my grandkids a big hug and smooch for me." "Zeus, too." "Zeus:" "Aw, right back at you, Grandma." "Oh, and also, um" "( terrier thinking ) Uh, Grandma." "Do you know who you're talking to?" "Grandma:" "Oh, be safe, all right?" "And, George, bring extra underwear." "You never know." "Zeus:" "TMI." "Just-- yeah." "My advice." "Okay, um-- oh, and say hi to Belinda." " I hope she's good." " ( beeping )" "Oh, George, I have to go." "My cookies are on fire." "Bye." "Oh, God." "No!" "Kids:" "Zeus!" "♪ Come on, cats, let's look alive ♪" "♪ We gonna jump ♪" "♪ Jump in joy, we're gonna jump ♪" "♪ Yeah... ♪" "Zeus:" "Ooh-ahh." "Christmas in California." "Who says you need snowmen and icicles, huh?" "Malibu, here we come." "♪ Come on cats, let's cut the rug... ♪" "Belinda:" "Whew, watch out." "Baby on board." "Here we go." "Out we go." "Zeus:" "Hello, California." " Hey, Ben." "Could you take Zeus?" " Woman:" "Got everything?" "Thanks." "Kara:" "Mine's the pink one." "Mine's the pink one." "Here you go." "George, you wanna help him with the bags?" "Here you go." "Like I said, George..." "Zeus:" "Hope these cars come with doggie seats." "We should have made a reservation, that's all." "Belinda, I think your hormones are driving you crazy." "Belinda:" "Oh, don't be so thick, George." "This is the busiest time of year." "Okay, but you don't need a reservation if you have a little Bannister charm." " Who can resist that?" " Hello." "Happy holidays and welcome to Ride and Save." "Well, hello, beautiful." "How are you?" "I'm George Bannister." "This is my wife Belinda and our" " Hello." " George: ..." "lovely kids." "Hey, kids." "Say hello." "( muttering )" " Ow!" " ( gasps )" "Dad, Ben put gum in my hair." "Kids, kids, kids." "Go sit down." "Belinda:" "Just go sit down." "We've been thinking about putting them up for adoption." "( sighs ) No, we haven't." "Just kidding." "We'd like to rent a car, though." "Well, what's the name on the reservation?" "George:" "Yeah, um... check under Bannister." "It's, uh" "You won't find it, but you could check." "I was gonna make a reservation, and then I" "We are visiting his older sister for Christmas." "I forgot." "You have no reservation?" "It's three days to Christmas." "The busiest travel time of the year." "I can't even rent a car without a reservation." "People don't understand the importance of reservation." "It means "to reserve." It means "to put on hold for an appointed time."" "I understand, but, uh... maybe without the reservation, take a look at my friend, Mr. Abe Lincoln, there." "Do you have any friends named Jackson," "Grant, or Franklin?" "Probably." "Let me check." "( groans )" "Zeus." "You must be so hot in your sweater in California." "Let's take it off." "( gasps ) Let's see what I can do." "Fantastic." "( meows )" "( cat thinking ) Nice sweater, sugar lips." "Trade you a scratch pad for it." "Zeus:" "Pfft, no way." "It was a Christmas gift from Georgie." "Cat: "It was a Christmas gift from Georgie."" "Zeus:" "Oh, wisenheimer, huh?" "Maybe I'm gonna teach you a lesson." "Kara, Ben:" "Zeus, where are you going?" "( whines )" "Cat:" "Nice try, mutt." "( barking )" "Cat:" "Also, this afternoon, I'm handing out free souvenir postcards." "Don't forget to write." "Zeus:" "Ugh, gross." "Get back, you little" " Cool!" " Radical!" "Oh!" "I think the baby likes it, too." "There's some kicking going on." " I wanna feel." " Me first, shorty face." " Okay, all right." " Guys, guys." "Come on." "Let's hit the open road." "Thank you." "Where's Zeus?" "( Zeus barking )" "Cat:" "You're too slow to catch me." "Zeus:" "We'll see about that." "Timber!" "( gasps )" "Cat:" "That's a wrap." " Zeus!" " George:" "Aw, Zeus." "What'd you do, buddy?" "Zeus:" "Ho ho ho?" "Man:" "Hey, it's no use, Babs." "You can't beat me, so you might as well not even try." "In fact, you should just concede now." "McFinnegan, you're exceptionally delusional this morning." "First, I clobbered you with that full-sized witch's cauldron on Halloween, then the 15-foot turkey float on Thanksgiving, and who can forget last Christmas' extravaganza?" "Two dozen wooden soldiers and a little drummer boy-- fully animated." "I remember." "That's why I vowed to put you to the canvas this year." "I'm shaking in my Crocs." "I want you to know that this season, my house will be so brightly lit that they'll be able to see it from the North Pole." "( chuckles ) North Pole?" "Yeah." "Who's delusional now, Babs?" "( laughs )" "Not me, sister!" "( honking horn )" "Hi!" "Welcome!" " Hi, Babs!" " Park at the base of the stairs." "George:" "Hey, Babs!" "Good to see you!" "I don't remember Aunt Barbara's house being so big." "George:" "Well, it's more Uncle Charlie's." " Belinda:" "Well, okay." "George" " I'm just saying." "Kara:" "How come we don't live in a house like this, Daddy?" "'Cause, honey." "You're either blessed with money or charm." " Aunt Barbara!" " We are blessed with charm." "Aunt Barbara!" "Good to see you!" "Ooh." "Hey." " Hi, welcome home." " George:" "Hi, how are you?" " You look so good." " Thank you." " George." "George." " Good to have you guys." " Honey, come on." " Can you help me out of here?" "Yeah, let's help this poor lady out of the car." " Hi!" " Hi!" "Welcome!" " Barbara:" "Oh, please come in." " Belinda:" "Great to see you." "Okay, come on, kids." "Let's go." "( grunting )" "Almost ran into the belly." " Come on, Zeusie." " Ow!" "Lookit!" "Come on, Zeusie." "Let's go." "Oh, lookit." "It's gorgeous." "Come on, honey." "Come on." "Babs:" "We've got good things for you, too, Zeus." "Belinda:" "Oh, look at this." "Oh, it's gorgeous." "Did you do all this yourself?" "Babs:" "Okay, I want you to go in, go look at the tree." "Awesome." "( gasps ) Cool, Aunt Barbara." "( gasps ) Oh, it's beautiful." "Yeah, well." "That's what happens when you marry a rich guy." " Ooh, it must be nice." " Babs:" "Thank you very much." "Now stay right there 'cause I wanna get your present." "Babs, Christmas isn't for three days." "Very good, that's good." "You can count, I can count." "I was a mathlete, remember?" "Yes, we know." "You were a mathlete." "You tell us every time we're together." "Zeus:" "I smell a plot." "Barbara, you didn't have to get us anything." "Yes, I did need to get you something." "You're gonna see it right now." "Okay." "I wonder what it could be." "Last year she got me a shaving kit." " I can't even grow stubble." " ( giggling )" "Okay, Ben." "Ben?" "It is the thought that counts." "And one day, that will come in very handy." "We hope." "Ooh, hey." "What's this?" "Okay, okay." "Here it is." "Oh, thank you, George." "Set it down very carefully." "Okay." "Drumroll." "( slapping legs )" "( all gasping ) A puppy!" "( puppy thinking ) You were expecting a gremlin?" " Kara:" "I wanna hold it!" " Come here, you." "Oh, please, please, let me hold her." "Zeus:" "Oh, great." "There goes the neighborhood." " Ben:" "Me first!" " George:" "Okay, don't fight." " Here, let your sister hold her." " Oh, she is cute." "George:" "Oh, my gosh." "Not only cute, but adorable." "What are you gonna call her?" "How about Christmas?" "You can't name a dog Christmas, dummy." "She'll get confused during the holidays." "Benjamin Bannister." "Do not call your sister a dummy." "I won't call her one if she doesn't act like one." " George" " Yeah, it's true." "You shouldn't act like one." "Then you don't get called one." "That's the rule." "All right, you know what, Ben?" "You shouldn't call your sister a dummy, okay?" " Why?" " Because it's the holiday season." "And you just don't-- there's no dummies around during the holidays." "How about Eve?" "Short for Christmas Eve." " Oh." " Sweetheart, Eve." " Honey, that's perfect." " I can live with that." "Yeah, I love the sound of that." "Eve Bannister." "Eve:" "In with the new, out with the old." "Babs:" "So, it's official, then." "I want you to make yourselves at home and I'm gonna go string up lots of electric lights." "Ciao." "Oh, Zeusie, look." "You've got a little sister." "Ben:" "Like a mini Zeus." "Eve:" "Hey, you." "What's your name?" "Zeus:" "I'm Zeus." "Former canine police dog." "But you can just call me "big boss man" or "big brother."" "Whichever's easier." "Eve:" "Cool." "Big brother it is." "Zeus:" "That's great." "Man:" "This looks like a good place to open up shop." "There we go." "Morning." "Man:" "Stewey, would you look at this view?" "( cooing )" "How many dogs we got on the roster today?" "This is it." "That's bad, Ted." "Bad." "Look, I thought the idea would take off by now." "I thought we'd have a franchise by now." " But we ain't." " Yeah, I know." "How was I supposed to know they were gonna open up a five-star doggie spa" " right down the friggin' street?" " We shoulda done what I said." "We coulda opened up a butcher-slash-ice-cream place right on the beach." "We would be in big money right now." "Okay, here we go again." "And to boot, we had to borrow money from that Tony Rowe for this non-moneymaking dog-washing venture." " Enough, Stewey." " And the guy, let me tell you something." "The guy's a slippery snake." "That's why I never shake his hand." "Because I don't wanna get none of that evil grease on me." "Lemme tell you something." "The guy's a real-  ( whines ) - ...nice guy." "Oh, Mr. Rowe." "How are you, s" "Well, well." "If it isn't Dumb and Dumber." "Look, Mr. Rowe, I was" "Come on." "Take a walk with me." "The both of you two." "Mr. Rowe:" "Come on." "Let's go." "You two boys have been ducking me." "Rowe:" "You see, I have this sixth sense." "And this sixth sense is telling me that you're about to confess the reason that you don't have my scratch is because going into this mobile dog van grooming business was the stupidest idea that ever crossed your two feeble minds." " Stewey:" "He must be a psychic." " Shh." "Mr. Rowe, sir." "Business has been extremely bad and, as a result, currently we don't have your money." "You don't have my money?" "No, sir." "Show me their thumbs." "( groaning )" "Eenie, meenie, miney, mo." "These two thumbs are about to go." "No, no, please, please, please." "( whispering )" "Not bad, Mikey." "Did you hear that, Richie?" "Initiative." "Mikey just reminded me you two used to be second-story guys." "You know, that's where you broke into homes, you robbed them, you stole things from them." "Am I speaking English?" "Nod so I know you're listening to me." " Ted:" "Yes, sir." " Okay." "So maybe we could work out a deal here." "Anything, Mr. Rowe." "Anything?" "Good answer." "I want you to go to this place." "Now, you're gonna find a lot of things, but there's only one thing I want." "There's only one object of true value." "And that's the star." "They say it shines with the brilliance of a hundred diamonds." "Or so they say." "Now you bring me that star, to show you that I don't harbor bad feelings," "I'm not a hard-hearted guy," "I'll not only forgive you for the insult of nonpayment..." "I'll even let you keep your thumbs." "All right, I'll let you keep both of them." "Thank you very much, Mr. Rowe." "Okay, good." "So I'm gonna meet you right here," "Christmas Eve, midnight." "Got it?" "So is that..." "late night on the 23rd?" " Or is that the 24th" " Look, look." "Let me make this very simple." "Christmas, 1:00 a.m. in the morning." "Right here." "Does that work for you?" "Because I don't want to interrupt your schedules." "I'll collect the star, and I'll collect my dog." "Here." " Dog?" " Yeah." "You're gonna clip her nails." "Then you're gonna paint them red for Christmas." "Aren't they, sweetheart?" "And then I want you to scrub the undercarriage." "Make it nice and nice." " Yes, of course." " Okay?" " Okay, sir." " Merry Christmas, boys." "Don't disappoint me." "Make way." "Richie:" "Take good care of the dog." "Belinda: "Put on a piece of jewelry that will stir up a little nostalgia and help him unleash his animal within."" "Hmm." "Oh." "The first gift you ever gave me, George." "Oh, where is the other one?" "( sighs ) I must be losing my mind." "( sighs )" "Belinda:" "Oh, it's beautiful." "Babs:" "These are our baby pictures." "Oh, your second husband was such a romantic." "Yes, he was." "He really was." "I wish George was a little more like that." "Zeus:" "So since I'm your new big brother," "I wanna school you on a few things pertaining to living with the Bannisters." "Eve:" "Okay, shoot." "Zeus:" "Now me and Georgie, we go way back." "Okay?" "We're like, real tight." "See, we have a routine going." "Every morning, I bring him his slippers and his paper." "Bottom line is, I'm Georgie's favorite, so don't expect too much attention from him." "How are you two getting along?" " Zeus:" "Us?" "Don't ask." " Belinda:" "Great." "Well, you know." "Like any long-term relationship, we have our peaks and our valleys." " Are you in a valley?" " Oh, no." "No." "No, we're not in a valley." "Well, you know." "With-- with the kids and work and the new baby coming, you know, things have gotten a little..." "Stale?" " Mm." " The cookie?" "Oh, no." "The cookie's very good." " The marriage?" " Mm-hmm." "Um, do you have any ketchup?" "For... the cookie?" "I'm putting it on everything." "You know, if you ask me, every marriage needs a little spark." "You know?" "And the anniversary time is a perfect time to do that." "Don't you think?" "You could have a picnic overlooking Bel Air." "You could have a moonlit supper on the beach." "You know, something like that." "Well, I mean, George hasn't mentioned anything yet." "He "hasn't mentioned anything yet"?" "But-- but it's your 20th anniversary the day after Christmas and it's almost" " I know, I know." "I do know that." " Christmas." "I do know that." "Zeus:" "Look, the way I see it, in order to get along, there are three rules you need to live by." "Eve:" "Should I write them down?" "Zeus:" "Good one." "First is, never share a bone with a dog that's foaming at the mouth." "Okay?" "Second is, never lap up toilet water." "Especially at night." "George hasn't forgotten our anniversary." "No, of course." "Pfft!" "Zeus:" "And the third and most important, whatever you do, no matter what, never, ever chew anything that's not meant to be chewed." "Like expensive women's shoes." "Eve:" "Uh-oh." "What should I do with this?" "Zeus:" "I suggest you lay low for a bit and let me try to fix that." "Hmm, let me see if I can fix this shoe so she doesn't get in trouble." "Remember that time he forgot your birthday and he got a calzone and put birthday candles on that?" "That was only because he knows that I love calzones." "And I know that." "And that was extremely creative and wonderful." "Right." "Oh, Zeusie." "What do you have there?" "Zeus:" "Oh, just trying to reshape the heel." " Almost done." " What does he" " Zeus!" "My Terragamo shoes." "Bad boy, Zeusie." "Oh." "If you wanted a snack, you could just have asked." "Zeus:" "No, but this wasn't my fault." "This was a crocodile skin Terragamo heel." "Some of my favorites." "Hey, hey, Babs." "I'm so sorry that, uh..." "He's usually a good guy and well-behaved." "So whatever your shoes are, just let me know and I'll be happy to pay for them." " Two thousand." " Dollars?" "It happens." "I'm over it." "Just make sure he's not chewing on my undies somewhere." "What are they, 13 bucks?" " Hey, buddy." "Look." " Zeus:" "But, George..." "We're guests here at Aunt Barbara's house, okay?" "She was nice enough to invite us here for the holidays." " You gotta respect her stuff." " Zeus:" "But, George, I" "I don't want you chewing shoes or undies or" "I can't believe I said that." " ( barks )" " Okay?" " ( barks )" " Okay." "Eve:" "Rule number one, Zeusie." "Never chew anything that's not meant to be chewed." "Zeus:" "Wow, I am gonna have my hands full" " with this little coconut." " George:" "Come on in." "( laughs ) There it is." "Stewey:" "Who owns that, the Kardashians?" "No, it's the widow of some rich philanthropist guy." "Some kind of antique collector." "He was loaded." "So he kicks the bucket, he wills this house to her, along with some very nice collectibles." " The star." " Exactamundo." " How'd you know this stuff?" " Wikipedia." "Stewey:" "So when do we rob the joint?" "First thing's last, okay?" "First, we gotta surveil this girl." "Get some intel." "Find out what Babs' daily routine is." "Maybe see if we can find out where she might hide the star." "That's easier said than done, Ted." "Look at that joint." "Uh-huh." "That's what this is for, Stewey." "I boosted this stuff from that spy shop over on Crenshaw." "Wow." "Ted, this is real James Bond stuff." "Look at this." "McCann, Stewey McCann." "What is wrong with you?" "Give me" "Our ears." "A hearing aid." "It don't fit." "Idiot, this goes in your ear." "That, you plant along the side of the house." " When are we gonna do this?" " Next week." " Really?" " No, you idiot." "Not unless you want to hitchhike with your freakin' pinkies." " We go now." " Today?" "You go." "You plant that device along the side of the house." " I'll be your lookout." " Ted, there's commando stuff." "Watch this." "Ted." "Ted." "That's it, that's it." "Eve:" "Wanna chase each other's tails?" "Zeus:" "No." "Not into it." "Eve:" "Yeah, you're right." "A dog your age shouldn't be exerting himself too much." "Zeus:" "Listen, puppy chow." "You're lucky I'm not a snitch." "Eve:" "What are you talking about?" "Zeus:" "I took the rap for you back there." "Eve:" "It was a joke, Zeusie." "How many times you gonna bring it up?" "Zeus:" "Until I feel better about it." "Eve:" "I said I was sorry." "You want a bucket of bones to go with it?" "Zeus:" "It's a good start." "( gasps )" "Try to be discreet." "Ted, I am being discreet." "Come on, chop, chop, Stewey." "What are you doing?" "Ted, I can't believe you're making me do this." "Okay, Babs is out front." "Now is your time." "Plant the device and flee." " Here?" " Ted:" "Plant the device and flee!" "Put it up high!" "Higher!" "I can't reach, Ted." "I threw out my back." "I'm not jumping up and down." "I'll hurt it again." "Nobody told you to mud wrestle those barmaids blindfolded." "Eve:" "Here, Zeus." "A peace offering." "Zeus:" "What is that?" "Eve:" "I don't know." " I found it in George's room." " Zeus:" "Hey." "What did I tell you about touching stuff that doesn't belong to you?" "Ted's voice on earpiece:" "Now plant that device on the windowsill." "Do it on three." "One... two, three." "( flatulence sputters )" " Zeus:" "Did you hear that?" " Eve:" "Hear what?" "Ted's voice:" "Jump, Stewey." "Jump." "I did it, Ted." "I did it." " ( barking ) - ( yelling )" "Okay, okay." "It's on there." "It's good, it's good." "Now get out of there, Stewey." "Flee, flee, flee." "Get out." "Bingo, bingo." "Move, move, move." " Get out." "Get out." " ( flatulence sputters )" "( sniffing )" "Zeus:" "Hmm." "I know that smell from somewhere." "Stewey:" "Ted!" " Ted!" "Dog!" " Come on." "Ted!" "Ted!" "I seen him!" "Stewey:" "I seen him!" "Ted, I seen him!" " Ted:" "Who?" " Stewey:" "Zeus, Ted." "I came face to face with Zeus, Ted." "Zeus?" "Zeus Bannister?" "No, Zeus from "Clash of the Titans."" "Yes, Zeus Bannister." "How many other Zeuses do you know?" " Now, that's bananas." " Ted, I seen him with my own two eyes." "I could smell his breath through the glass, Ted." "Stewey, look." "We don't have time for your delusions or pranks." "You know I don't like dogs." "You told me, "Stewey, you never have to work with a dog again."" " Da-da-da da-da-da." " Pull yourself together." "Just shut up." " Ted" " Did you plant the device?" "Does a bear sleep in the woods?" "What do I know from bears, okay?" " Did you plant the friggin' device?" " Yes, I planted it." "Okay." "Okay, good." "All right." "So, then... let's just relax." "It was just a yellow lab." "They all look alike." "Okay, Zeus and the Bannisters are probably a million miles away." "Maybe you're right, Ted." "You always know how to make me feel better." "George's voice on radio:" "Have you seen my toothbrush?" "Belinda's voice on radio:" "I put it on the nightstand this morning." "Here we go." "It's working." "Belinda:" "If I had a dollar for every time you lost your toothbrush..." "George:" "I didn't lose it." "Someone moved it." "Belinda:" "You're right." "The toothbrush fairy came all the way from Connecticut just to steal George Bannister's toothbrush." "I told you, Ted." "I told you, Ted." "I don't believe it." "( phone ringing )" "Sarah, hi." "I know, I've been waiting for your call." "Look, no, no." "She doesn't know anything yet." "Okay." "You are so beautiful." "Okay." "Listen, I-I-I don't think-- no, I know." "I know, I gotta tell her soon." "Okay, look." "I don't want to get caught." "Um... don't call me, all right?" "Just text me." "Gotta go." "Bye." "George, who are you talking to?" "What are you doing in there?" "They wanted me to switch cellular service." "George:" "Gosh, I'm still so jet-lagged." "I feel like it's time for bed already." "Oh, my goodness, George." "What are you wearing?" "Like it?" "Borrowed it from Babs." "Listen, Belinda, I was thinking, since the kids are on the other side of the house, miles and miles away" "I know." "We can finally get some sleep." "Well, sleep if you're dull." "Or how about a massage?" "Oh, that's sweet, honey." "Thanks." "But I think I'm just gonna read." "I-I meant for me." "Come on." "One of your deep-tissue massages." " Babs has got me tight and worked up." " I-- are you serious, George?" " Dead serious." " I don't-- no, no." "I-- no, no, no." "You know, you're doing a lot of complaining for someone that's trying to give me a massage." " ( groans )" " Ah, yeah." " I'll drink plenty of water after this." " Okay." " Belinda:" "George, come on." "I can't-- - ( George moaning )" " George:" "It's a little hard there." " Belinda:" "Sorry." "George:" "You know what I was thinking about the other day?" "How romantic I was when I asked you to marry me." "Remember, Rockefeller Center, under the Christmas tree?" "Belinda:" "How could I forget that at a moment like this, George?" "Bannister doesn't know how to treat a woman." "Oh, and you do, Stewey?" "I know how to make 'em cry." " ( flatulence sputters, laughs )" " Oh!" "Stewey!" "You're making me cry." "My eyes are watering." " Oh, jeez." " George, this" "Hold on, baby." "I can't reach my wine." " This is" " Okay." "George, this is really the last thing I wanna" " All right, Belinda." " Come on." "A little less of this, a little bit more of this." " ( sighs )" " Ah--!" "Ow!" "Come on." "You gotta do it that hard?" " Oh, will you just" " Gosh, okay." " That's so rough." "You're shaking me." " George, I" " Whoa." "Jeez." " ( gasps )" " Belinda!" " George!" "Eve:" "Uh-oh." "That'll leave a mark." " What -- it's all over the sheets." " Well, you pushed me." "It's not a relaxing massage when you're pushing me" " Come on, get some towels." " It wasn't very relaxing." "They're under the sink." "Under the sink." "What are you do-- under the sink, not in the bathtub." " Over here." " Zeus:" "Hang on, Georgie." "I got this." "And that's how it's done." "Hey, Georgie, Belinda." "You can come out now." " Took care of it." " Oh, look." "It's all better now." "I'd really like to be sleeping, George." "Is what I'd like-- oh." "What are you" " What's going on?" " We've had an accident here, honey." "Your father just decided to spill his w-- grape juice all over the bed." "Well, I wouldn't have, honey, if you weren't so rough." " TMI, Dad." "TMI." " Right?" "Aw, not only is she cute, but she's smart, too." "Kara:" "Look how she blotted up the juice with her tiny little paws." "Zeus:" "Uh-- heh heh." "Ben:" "You'd think Zeus would be the one to do it." "Zeus:" "Uh, I did do it." "She copied me." " Kara:" "Good girl, Eve." " Zeus:" "Times like this," "I wish I had a voice box." "( barking )" " ( chirping ) - ( barks )" "Run!" " Eve:" "Got it." " Zeus:" "Hey." "That was my catch." "Boy, I tell you." "That puppy's got game." "Belinda:" "Wow." "Where'd she learn how to do that?" "She's a Bannister, honey." "All Bannisters are athletically inclined." "Some of us are, honey." "I could do the same thing to you, you know." "But I won't." "I wouldn't." "That'd be wrong." "Zeus:" "Beginner's luck." "Trust me." "Eve:" "And there's more where that came from." "That's right." "You can't touch the athletic prowess of a former K-9." "Not to mention an original Bannister." " I'm gonna get a little fun in." " Belinda:" "Okay." " Man the fort, honey." " All right." "All right." "Careful, hon-- careful." " Careful, careful." " Honey, I'm fine." " Athleticism." " George" "George:" "Come here, Eve." "You little rascal." "How about a game of fetch?" "Just us this time." "Zeus:" "Hey, I wanna play, too." "I'll be right here, in case anyone cares." "Babs:" "Aw, it looks so nice." " Belinda:" "You're doing a real good job." " Babs:" "Yeah, I'm a little shocked." "Someone should call Christmas Magazine for a photo shoot." "This tree looks like it's right out of the North Pole." "That'd be great, but there's some lights missing and the candy canes are all crooked." "Okay, well, that's a lot of complaining from someone who hasn't hung one ball." "Honey, I'm a director, okay?" "That's what I do." "I have a vision, and then I tell you what to do." " Mm-hmm." "Cecil B. Bannister over here." " Uh-huh." "Yes." "Hey, let's put a wicked train set underneath." "Well, that's a good idea, buddy." "But I don't think there's any room." "Ben:" "Well, there would be if we lose the corny Nativity scene." "Okay, Ben, we are not getting rid of the Nativity scene." "That is the true meaning of Christmas." "That's right, Ben." "Your mother's right." "Usually she's not." "This time she is." "George:" "You don't want to be a pawn to the sugarcoated, commercialized version of Christmas." "Fine, then I'll get rid of your gift." " Whoa." "Let's not get crazy, buddy." " George" "I'm just telling him, Belinda, that you're right, okay?" "And we want to know the real meaning of why we celebrate Christmas." " It's the birth of Jesus." " That's right." "Just tell me we don't have to go to church for the Midnight Service this year." "Ben, we go to church every Christmas Eve, and this year will be no different." "That's correct." "Ben, if you want to be Jewish, you can be Jewish." " Belinda:" "Honey." " What are we gonna top the tree with?" "Ooh, something very special and very valuable." "Belinda:" "It's the famous Christmas star." " Yeah!" " Babs:" "George, can you help me out?" " Oh, sure." " You're about an inch or two taller" " than all the kids and dogs." " Kara:" "Wow, it's beautiful." "Look at it sparkle, Daddy." "Yeah, just like your daddy." "Belinda:" "Okay, kids, make a little room." "Dad's gonna get the ladder." "Here we go." "Zeus:" "Sorry I'm late." "That crocodile heel did a number on my insides." "It was pretty good going down, but... ( barks )" "Zeus:" "Hey, that sweater looks familiar." " Okay, how's that?" " All right, everybody back away." " ( groans )" " Honey, be careful up there." " Honey, I know what I'm doing." " Oh, jeez." "Okay." "Please." "I don't need everybody commentating." "Ooh, you did that on purpose." "Ben:" "Dad, don't wreck our tree." " Son-- there we are." " Babs:" "There you go." "That's perfect." "Zeus:" "Yo, pipsqueak." "That's my sweater." "George, that's my Christmas sweater." "You gave it to me as a gift, and I quote," ""For my best friend in the entire world."" " ( barks )" " Hey, buddy." "Eve:" "What's the big deal?" "You weren't even using it." "Hey, Zeus." "You know the rules." "Off the couch." "Oh, look at little Evie with her cute little Christmas sweater." "She looks like a furry angel." " Oh, she does." "She's so cute." " She's a furry angel." " You are fuzzy." " Babs:" "She's so cute." "Zeus:" "Furry little nightmare." "Eve:" "Sharing is caring." "Especially around the holidays." "Now where have I heard that before?" "Zeus:" "This, of course, means war." "Grandma:" "It's a cookie." "It's a big" "( kids yelling )" "Oh, it's a-- it's-- peering in the wind-- what?" "It's-- open-- it's Santa" "Santa is-- he's got something wrong with his ears." "Oh, it's an elf-- it's an elf with lockjaw?" "I don't know, I don't know." "( kids' voices overlapping )" "Reindeer!" "Snowman!" "Reindeer!" "Oh, he's telling the elf to be quiet because they have lots of work to do." "It's silent, he's sleeping, and it's at night." " Reindeer!" " ( phone ringing )" "Silent!" "Oh, I got it!" "Silent night!" "Yes!" " Yay!" " Grandma, Grandma!" " What, what?" " The phone, the phone." "Oh!" "Oh, okay." "Honey, it's about time you called." "I left a dozen messages." "Oh, quiet down, everybody." "My daughter's on the phone." "Grandma on phone:" "I was starting to get paranoid, thinking that you were boycotting me." "How are you?" " Hi, Mom." "How's the party?" " It's going great." "Yeah, it is booming with a capital B. How are you?" "Oh, uh, kicking with a capital K." "Grandma:" "Oh, good." "Good." "Guess who showed up?" "Cousin Jamie and her husband Ralph." "With the kids." " Oh!" " Yeah, they brought a low-carb, no-fat little, tiny, small rum cake." "Oh, hi-- tell them all I say Merry Christmas." "Yeah, well, whatever." "I don't talk to them that much anyway." "Grandma:" "So what's going on?" "Well, I" "I need your advice about something." "Okay, what?" "Oh, I know what it is." "It's your belly." "Oh, honey." "You know that scratching?" "If you put some baby oil on that, some ointment, and just rub it in about 20 minutes, it'll go away." "Yeah, no-- well, yes, it is itching." "But that's not what it is." "It's about George." "He's acting really strange." "I'm sure it's his underwear." "It's riding high on him." "You know what?" "I have heard that it has caused brain damage in some people." "And I'm sure it has with him." "Mom, I'm really trying to tell you something serious here." " What?" " Well-- well, he's just been acting strange." "And, I mean, stranger than usual." "Well, can you be specific?" "Well-- it may not sound like a lot, and I don't wanna sound crazy, but I noticed that he's... started to take his phone to the bathroom all the time." " Okay." " We're talking about a guy who can't even text." "I mean, he doesn't know how to send a text message." "And then last night he's on the phone for a really-- like 20 minutes." "And then he comes out and he's wearing one of Babs' bathrobes and then he's rambling on, something about telemarketers and" "All right, I'm gonna tell you something." "A little secret, okay?" "You have been married an awful long time because things are starting to get strange and they will get stranger." "So you just gotta not worry about that." "Don't get the little stuff all bobbled in your head, okay?" "So what are you saying?" "Well, I'm saying that..." "I think it's time that you two find some time to sort of pick up some romance again." "Okay?" "Find something that you can to bring all those feelings back." " Kara:" "Ben put gum in my hair!" " Ben:" "You're a real jerk!" "Uh, Mom, I've got to go." "Oh, okay, honey." "So do I." " Well, I love you!" " I love you, Mom." " Merry Christmas!" " Bye, sweetie!" "Bye." "( sighs )" "Well, look what the Grinch dragged in!" "Babs:" "Ned McFinnegan." "You know, it's one thing to have a little healthy competition for the holidays, but spying?" "Now, that is a horse of a very different color." "What are you talking about?" "What horse?" "I found this strategically placed outside my window." "What is it, satellite TV?" "Are you trying to spy on me, Ned?" "Spying on my plan for my electric lights during the holidays?" "That's insane." "I thought you switched to decaf." "I did." "But trust me, Ned, at the end of this Christmas season, it's the North Pole that's gonna be calling me about how to spread Christmas cheer." "Got it?" "( cracking )" "( static crackles )" "I got it." "( laughs )" "( static crackles )" " ( flatulence sputters )" " This dog smells like Newark, Ted." "( barks )" " Well, that's the end of that." " Now what?" "Ted:" "Plan B, Stewey." "I thought that was Plan B." " Whatever." "Plan C." " Well, Plan B stunk anyway." " Like Tony Rowe's mutt." " ( barks )" "( barking )" "You're gonna paint her nails." "Stinky mutt." "Let's get out of here." "( snoring )" "Zeus:" "Like Belinda said, every relationship has its peaks and its valleys." "So I'll just remind George why he loves me so much." "Any second now." "Slippers in place." "Newspaper ready." "Come on, George." " ( snorts )" " Zeus:" "That train is never late." " ( groans )" " Good morning." "Honey, no more garlic knots for you." "( groans )" "Zeus:" "Showtime." " Where's my slippers?" " Zeus:" "What the heck?" "They were here last night." "I am not the gatekeeper of your things, George." "Eve:" "I'll get them, George." "Excuse you." "Zeus:" "They're gone." "Well, who is, Belinda?" "Zeus:" "Maybe George moved them closer to the bed." "( Eve barks )" " Ah!" " Zeus:" "Sneak thief." "George:" "There she is." "( gasps ) Yes, someone loves Daddy." "Zeus:" "You stole them last night." "Totally robbed my idea." "Eve:" "Stole is such an ugly word." "I just planned ahead." "Unbelievable how smart you are." "Yes, you know to get Daddy's slippers." " Yes, you do." " I think I'm gonna be sick." "Well, you are pregnant, honey." "No, I think it's your sister's cooking." " Oh, yeah." "That could be, too." " ( groans )" "I see you have no problem giving your morning kisses to a dog." "Belinda, honey, if you want me to lick your face, all you gotta do is ask." "The thing is, George, a girl shouldn't have to ask." "( sighs )" "Eve's a girl." "She didn't ask." "Did you, Eve?" "Zeus:" "The battle lines have been drawn." "There we go." " We forgot a scarf." " Yeah." "Oh, I don't think a snowman's gonna wear a scarf, buddy, in southern California." "All snowmen wear scarves, Daddy." "Everyone knows that." "I mean, come on." "Oh, you mean sandman, not snowman." "Well, I'm just saying, I don't think a snowman's gonna wear a scarf on a hot, sunny day." " Fine." " Why don't we put a swimsuit on him?" " Why don't we not?" " George:" "Okay, guys." "Don't fight, all right?" "Belinda, you wanna weigh in on this?" "Snowmen wear scarves." " Aha!" " I told you." "Okay, put the scarf on." "Eve:" "Still mad about the slippers thing?" "Come on, cranky." "Lighten up a bit." " Zeus:" "I'm busy." " Eve:" "Busy doing what?" "Zeus:" "Silently judging you." "Eve:" "Boring." "Where's my bucket?" "I don't know." "Belinda, have you seen my buck-- oh!" " ( groans )" " Ben:" "Ow!" "Dad!" "Well, that's what happens when you lose your bucket." "Really?" "Eve:" "Maybe this will jolly you up a little." " What are you doing?" " Ahem, excuse me." " You're blocking my sun." " Sorry." "Hey, have you seen my bucket?" " Ahem" " What's wrong with you?" "Whatever do you mean, Romeo?" "Well, it seems like you've been giving me the stink eye." " That's what I mean." " Must be your imagination." "I don't think so." "Hey, have you seen the bucket?" "( groans ) George." "Zeus:" "Allow me to get that for you, George." "Eve:" "Stick around for a while." "I'll get it, George." "Zeus is tied up at the moment." "Zeus:" "Hmm." "Now, how did it go again?" "Here's my bucket." "Thank you, Eve." "I love you." "How great is this dog?" "Well, maybe you two should get married, George." "I'll make her go get the shovel." "Eve, go get the shovel." "Go ahead." "Zeus:" "Hah, I'm back." "You can't keep a good dog down." "Okay, playtime's over." "Eve:" "No, Zeus." "I wanna get the shovel." "Zeus:" "Fool George once, shame on him." "Fool George twice, shame on you." "Sly trickery is one thing, but that won't work here in broad daylight." "Eve:" "Shakespeare?" "Zeus:" "Chappy the Wonder Dog." "Come on, Heinz." "Don't fail me now." "That shovel is mine." "Ah!" "Water in my eyes." " No, Zeusie, no!" " Zeus:" "I can't see!" " ( kids screaming )" " George, is that you?" " No!" " No!" " No!" " No!" "( groans )" " Oh, George." "Look at that." " That took a long time to make." "( gasps )" " You're a real jerk, Zeus." " How could you, Zeusie?" " Bad dog, Zeus." "Bad dog." " Zeus:" "I" "Zeus:" "I'm sorry, okay?" "It was an accident." "I was just" " George, you have to tell them I didn't mean it." "What are we gonna do with that dog?" "Eve:" "Tough break, big brother." "Zeus:" "But..." "Belinda:" "Oh, Babs." "It's George." "He's acting really funny." "Define "funny."" "He's getting these secretive phone calls and sending text messages." "I mean, George doesn't know how to send a text message." "He doesn't even-- he's never sent a text message." "And then-- and then he gets a phone call from someone named..." "Sarah." " Sarah?" " Sarah." " Who's Sarah?" " I don't know." " Oh." " I know." "Oh." "Well-- oh, honey." "Oh, Babs." "I mean, can you blame him?" " Look at me." " You look per" "I look like a bloated Oompa Loompa." "No, you-- you look like a regular Oompa Loompa." "I do." "They're bloated by nature." "That's what they look like." "They're lovely, you're lovely." "You radiate beauty and-- and being bornness." "You know what else?" "You know what?" "What?" "I think he really did forget our anniversary." "No, no, wait." "This is the idiot, dolt, stupid person." "But this is also the person that adores his wife." "Adores his wife." "And, you know, this emotional thing that you're feeling right now, it's very consistent with pregnant women." "They have an emotional response to a sort of benign environment." "Benign data." "You know, my best friend Jenny, when she was pregnant, she was so paranoid, she thought her husband was a bag man for the CIA." " Oh-- that's crazy." " Yeah." " That is crazy, see?" " That's crazy." "And that's where you can go." "Zeus:" "Good going, Zeus." "You're a real Christmas prince." "Managed to irritate everybody for the holidays." "Keep up the good work." "( snoring, groaning )" "Ted?" "Psst, Ted." "I'm here." "Ted:" "Do not linger there." "She's just around the corner." "Get inside." "I shouldn't have had that calzone, Ted." "( flatulence sputters )" "Ted, this is crazy." "We've never done a job with the people in the house before." "Ted:" "Yeah, well, the stakes have never been this high before, Stewey." " ( door creaking )" " Drastic measures call for... drastic measures." "So from our surveillance, we know a couple of things, right?" "Ted:" "Number one, that star is definitely somewhere inside that house." "Number two, we know that Babs is up on the roof fiddling with those stupid Christmas lights." "Number three, we know that if we do not snag that star by Christmas, we lose our thumbs." "So add those three things together, what do you got?" " Stewey:" "A headache." " Ted:" "No!" "You idiot!" "You got irrefutable proof that we definitely have to infiltrate that house while people are home." "We got no other option." "Ted." "Ted, I can't see nothing." "Ted:" "Listen to me, Stewey." "Time to put on the game face, okay?" "Our number one objective is that star." "So do not get sidetracked by any funny business." "This is business-business." "Ted, I'm so hungry, I could eat a waitress." "Don't even think about it, Stewey." "Ted, this house is a score." "Why we just robbing the star for?" "Ted:" "First things first, Stewey." "The star is most likely on top of the Christmas tree, so now we gotta find that Christmas tree." "Oh, a light just went on." " ( toilet flushes )" " Ted:" "Hide, hide quick." "Hide." "( flatulence sputters )" " Did you just" " Stewey:" "That wasn't me." " It was Bannister." " Yeah, right." "California tremors." "I've heard about these things." "I think we're having an earthquake." "Ted:" "Hold your position." "Quick, into the next room." "Go, go, go, go, go." "( groans )" "There must be a hundred rooms in this place." "Do like we said before." "Start on one side of the house and move to the other." "Stewey:" "You gotta see this place, Ted." "But I can't find the tree." "Ted:" "It's right behind you, dumbo." "I found it." "I'm gonna get it." "Hold on." "I can't reach it." "( thumping )" "I got it." "Oh, no, no." "Don't shake-- don't" "( shatters )" "Ted:" "Get out of there, now." "Get out." "Abort, abort." "Go." "Eve:" "Zeus, go get 'em." " Ah!" " ( barking )" "Zeus:" "You!" " Ah!" " ( barking continues )" "Go, Stewey!" "( flatulence sputters )" "( sniffs )" "( snoring )" "George:" "Has anyone seen my toothbrush?" "( yawns ) Good morning." "Oh, no." "George." " Oh, what happened here?" " I don't know what's gotten into Zeus." "Honey, we've got to get this cleaned up before Barbara sees it." "I know." "Zeus, get in here." "Zeus:" "I didn't do it, George." "We were under attack by that cat burglar clown, Stewey." "Call the police." "Call the Malibu National Guard." " ( gasps )" " Zeus:" "Call my mother." "Call your mother." "Call somebody." "Looks like a broken ornament." "Zeus, this-- this is totally unacceptable behavior, okay?" "I don't care what you're doing, you are now grounded to the yard until we get home," " and there's no treats for you." " But, Dad" "Honey, I'm sorry." "That's the way it's gonna go." "Zeus:" "George, would you just listen to me?" "Also, there's gonna be no Christmas activities, okay?" "Zeus:" "But Christmas only comes once a year." "I didn't even do anything, George." "I'm innocent." "I'll tell ya, I'm innocent." "Eve:" "The hubris of the guilty." "Honey, sit." "Maybe you're being a little harsh on him." "I'm not, Belinda." "He can't just run around doing whatever he wants in my sister's house." "I mean, look." "Look at this one." "She's 11 pounds of sweetness and has a lot more common sense." "Eve:" "I couldn't agree with you more." "Mommy, Daddy." "Look what I found under Zeus' doggie bed." "Zeus:" "What?" "You set me up?" "Isn't that Dad's toothbrush?" "The new one?" "Belinda, that's my favorite toothbrush now." " Belinda:" "I know." " I saw the commercial and I got it." "I know it's your favorite." "It's your favorite, I know." " It goes in and out." " We'll get you a new one." "The Oral 5000." "That's why this Christmas was gonna be special." "Zeus:" "But I didn't do it." "Eve:" "Boy, Zeus." "So far, you've broken, like, every rule in the book." "Zeus:" "I can't believe it." "Eve:" "You told me to hide it." "Zeus:" "That's all I can stand and I can't stand no more." "( barking )" " Leave her alone, Zeus." " Yeah, she's just a puppy." "Take Eve, all right?" "I'm gonna take Zeus, okay?" "Come on, Zeus." "Come on." "Okay, kids." "Brush your teeth." "Not-- not with that one." "I hate to do this, Zeus, but you got to learn to behave." "( George sighs ) You disappoint me, buddy." "You know, we're guests in someone's house and you're running around like a cat, not a dog." "Zeus:" "Let me out, George." "Please?" "I didn't do anything wrong." "Please, George?" "I don't know." "You just disappoint me." "Zeus:" "George." "George, come on." "Don't leave me out here." "I'll be better." "I promise." "( barks )" " ( flatulence sputters )" " Zeus:" "That sounded like thunder." "( goat thinking ) That's the ugliest goat I've ever seen." "Yeah?" "Really?" "I'm a dog." "Well, what are you doing out here with us, then?" "Oh, well, I guess you guys just heard all that, did you?" "Yeah, that's-- that's embarrassing." "Goat:" "You'll get used to it." "Pretty soon they'll stop coming to visit, too." "Zeus:" "What do you mean?" "George loves me." "English goat:" "Don't listen to him." "He gets crabby when his stomach's upset." "I told you not to eat that fine beluga caviar without a sweet pinot grigio to cut the acid." "Gruff goat:" "Sure, they love you." "That's why you're out here and they're all in there." "Merry Christmas, kid." "Zeus:" "Let me out, George." "Please." "I didn't do anything wrong." "Come on, George." "( Zeus sniffing ) Do I smell gingerbread?" "Come on" "English goat:" "Well, that's a new one." "Zeus:" "They can't really be having Christmas without me." "I gotta see this to believe it." "They're really having Christmas without me." "♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh ♪" "♪ Hey, jingle bells, jingle bells ♪" "♪ Jingle all the way... ♪" "Zeus:" "I" " I can't believe it." "I've been replaced." "I'm so sorry, George." "Guess I'll just go back to my cage before I ruin Christmas any more." "( horse thinking ) This is the worst Christmas ever." "( snoring )" "Here we go." "Now take it easy." "It's lots of steps." " Babs:" "This is so exciting." " ( laughing )" "It is very exciting, isn't it?" "Georgie, stand right over here with the puppy." "Come on, kids." "Come on." "Oh, this is what we've all been waiting for." "Kids and moms and dads and doggies and me." "We're gonna be the Christmasiest house this side of the universe." "Including Ned McFinnegan." "Okay, ready?" " ( beeping )" " George:" "Eve's ready." " Here we go." "Drumroll." " Okay." "And..." "And... go!" "Oh, no." " Oh." " Was that supposed to happen?" "I don't think so." "You hooked it up to a generator, right?" "A separate generator." "Wait, let me try it again." "Belinda:" "Well, that sounds complicated." "Here we go." "Ready?" "Ready?" "It's gonna work this time." "And... ( groans ) Oh..." "Oh, no." " George:" "Let's go to Mass." " Belinda:" "Let's go." "Let's go." "I knew that 40-amp would never hold." " Let's go to church." " Let's go to church." "We'll go to church and we'll pray." "Belinda:" "And we'll work it out when we get back." " I've got to go to the store." " No, no." "We're going to church and you're coming with us." " But" " No buts, Babs." "It's a Christmas Eve tradition." "Fine, I'm going." "But can we stop at the market on the way back?" "George:" "That's fine." "I need a new toothbrush, anyway." "Come on, honey." "Kara, in the car." " Bingo!" "Hey, they're leaving." " ( snoring )" " This is our chance right here." " What about the mutt?" "That's what I got this for." " A calculator?" " No, it's a Doggy Dazer." "What are you gonna do, shock him?" "No, that's a Taser." "This is a Dazer." "It emits a high-pitched frequency." "Drives dogs nutty." "Hey, why don't we try it on Tony Rowe's mutt?" "( dog barks )" "Come on, they're gonna be back soon." "We gotta go." " Let's go." " I'll deal with you later, mutt." " ( growls ) - ( dog barks )" "Kara:" "Dad, Ben put gum in my hair again." "Ben:" "It was an accident." "( Zeus whines )" "Zeus:" "I'm just not needed anymore." "Maybe I should just go." "At least that way, I won't get in anybody's way." "English goat:" "Hey, kid." "If you see my brother Anthony, tell him I'm doing great." "Zeus:" "Hey, Eve." "Come down here a minute." "We need to talk." "( barking )" " ( Zeus barks ) - ( Eve barks )" "Zeus:" "Look, there's no room for two dogs in this family anymore." "You're the dog of the house now." "Eve:" "But I'm just a" "Zeus:" "Remember, George likes to play fetch with a tennis ball, not a baseball, okay?" "And Belinda, she loves it when you sit and chill by her feet when she reads." "Oh, and Ben and Kara?" "They love to play freeze tag in the summer and hide-and-seek in the winter." "Oh, and don't forget to let Kara win." "Eve:" "You're such a drama queen, Zeus." "( barking )" "Eve:" "Zeus, wait a second." " Zeus:" "I smell..." " ( flatulence sputters )" " Ted:" "Jeez, Stewey!" " Zeus: ...trouble!" "Great, just what I need." "A crisis of conscience, at my lowest point, no less." "Now, do I, A-- run away and leave a poor helpless puppy to the wolves, not to mention Aunt Barbara's multi-million dollar home, vulnerable?" "Or, B-- do I go back and show these crooks and everyone why I was the number one K-9 in my division three years in a row?" "Eve:" "Wait, you're not going to leave me here." "Are you?" "Zeus:" "Being the dog of the house carries a big responsibility." "And it's not mine to carry anymore." "Eve:" "He'll come back." "I think." "( church bell ringing )" "Babs:" "Come on, kids." "Let's find some seats." "Belinda:" "Okay, we'll see you inside." "( car door closes )" " George?" " Yeah?" " Who are you texting?" " Texting?" "( laughs ) I don't text." "You know that." "I'm not up with technology." "Although I would like to go into that social networking thing." "Who is Sarah?" "Sarah?" "( stammering )" "Oh, come on." "Just come clean, George." " What do you mean?" " The texting, and the secret phone calls..." "Belinda, there's no secret phone calls, texting." "I don't know anything about" "( sighs ) Okay, here it is." "Sarah is a friend." " Oh, a friend." " Yeah." "Well, George, that is very hard to believe when all of us know that you don't have any friends." "Well, I will when I get on the social networking thing." "( sighs )" "Trust me, Belinda." "It's not what you think, okay?" " Trust me." " Okay, you want me to trust you?" " Then let me see your phone." " I don't ask you for your phone." " Why won't you give me your phone?" " No, this is my business." "I don't check your phone." "George, you are obviously hiding something from me." "This is not the time to be hiding things from me, George." "Have you once thought about how I might feel right now?" " Yes." " I am very full all the time." "My feet are swollen, I am very emotional," " I have a lot going on." " I understand." "Have you thought about what I do all day long, George?" " I do." "I thought" " I don't think that you have." "And, you know, I'm tired and there is a child that's gonna be arriving soon, and I think we should be on the same page, George." " Do you think Facebook is the best?" " ( groans )" "( faintly ) It's right here." "Hey." "What kind of lock is this?" "Never seen a lock like this before." " It's a Messerschmitt." " A messa-what?" "A Messerschmitt." "Germany's finest." " Can you pick it?" " Unpickable." "You got, like, a credit card or something on you?" " Bam." " Thanks." "Jose Juanito Gonzales?" "Five foot two?" "170 pounds?" "I pickpocket 'em at the gym." "Watch and learn, Stewey." " Ted, let's just break the glass." " Chill, muchacho." " Almost got it." " ( bolt clicks )" "Always with you what can't be done, Stewey." "( whispers ) Close the door." "Eve:" "What do I do?" "What do I do?" "Dog." "Ha-ha." "They must've got a new puppy." "Hey, little doggie." "Eve:" "Stay back or I'll" " Now we gotcha." " Ted:" "She looks dangerous." "For you." "On three or on two?" "Ah." "There's no place for you to go." "( Eve barking ) Oh, man." "These guys mean business." " One." " Three!" "Ha!" "Eve:" "Zeus, help!" " ( laughs ) - ( barking )" "Ted:" "She don't look that tough." " Stewey:" "Now we gotcha." " ( chuckles )" " ( laughs )" " Let's tie her up inside here." " Let's do this." " Ted:" "You stay here and don't cause no trouble." "Come on, let's get that star." "Eve:" "Help me!" "Someone!" "Zeus!" "Belinda, if you just let me explain." "I have nothing to say to you, George Bannister." "Ben:" "Nice work, Dad." "Kara:" "Yeah, you're a real smooth smoothie." "Babs:" "This is low, even for you." " It's complicated, okay?" " Do not try to weasel out of this." "Just admit what you did." "I didn't do anything wrong." " ( sighs ) - ( sighs )" "( Zeus sighs )" "We had some good times." "Didn't we, guys?" "( glass breaks )" "Eve:" "I wish Zeus was here." "Zeus:" "I bet you do." "Zeus!" "Boy, am I glad to see you, big brother." "Sit tight, pup." "I have a score to settle." "All right, keep your eyes peeled for Zeus." "Stewey:" "I can smell him." " Ted, na-na-na-na-na" " Stew, look at that." "She's beautiful." "It is beautiful." "How are we gonna get that thing down?" "I saw a chainsaw in the yard." "I'll take it out, cut the tree in half-- ( imitates chainsaw buzzing )" "Chainsaw?" "What-- there's a hallway up there." "Go up the stairs, go up in the hallway, lean over the railing, and pluck the star." " Then we get out of here." " Nah, I'm scared of heights." "Go up the stairs and get the star." "Ted, I'm scared of heights." "You know this." "Fine." "I'll do it." "No funny business." "This is business-business." "( laughs ) Sucker." "Eve:" "My big brother is gonna teach you guys a lesson." "Here we go." "( grunting )" "Zeus:" "Bad idea." "( barking ) We gotta stop meeting like this." " ( Zeus barking ) - ( straining )" " ( both yelling )" " Oof!" "Zeus:" "Hi, boys." "Miss me?" "It's Zeus!" "It's Zeus!" "It's Zeus!" "Let's get him." "Get up." "Okay, he's upstairs." " Oh!" "What the" " Stewey:" "Ah!" "( barking )" "No, no, no, no." "Don't chase him." "That's exactly what he wants us to do." "Gotta use the old onion here, Stewey." "Come on." "Come on." "Zeus:" "Think I'm gonna need a little backup on this one." "Hmm." "I wonder if Francine is working dispatch tonight." "( phone ringing )" "Man's voice:" "This is 9-1-1." "What is your emergency?" " ( barking )" " Hello?" "Zeus:" "Nothing says Merry Christmas like a SWAT team." " What are you thinking about, Ted?" " Shh." "Enough of this." "Ted:" "We are gonna let Zeus come to us." "Stewey:" "Ted, why are we waiting by the front door?" "Ted:" "Shut up, Stewey." "Give me my net." "All right, Stewey." "Let's get out of here" " before Zeus comes back." " Zeus:" "Had enough, boys?" "Can't take the heat from canine numero uno?" "Time to take out the tr-- whoops." " Ha!" "Ah." " ( whines )" "( laughs ) You ain't so tough." "You ain't so tough." "Huh, police dog?" "Look what I got for you, huh?" "Right here." "Yeah, muzzle for you." "Keep your mouth shut." "Zeus:" "You better hope I don't get out of this thing." "Eve:" "Hey, stay out of my doggie treats." "Ted:" "Big tough police dog." " Stewey." " What?" " Throw me the rope." " Ted, they got nothing to eat." "Stewey, Stewey" "You ain't going anywhere, Zeusie." "Zeus:" "This was not part of the plan." "Let's go get that star." "Grab the bag." "Okay, now I'm gonna get the star, and we give it to Tony Rowe." "All right." "I got an idea." "Check this out." "What are you, the Lone Ranger?" "Watch, watch, watch." "Wait." " Eve:" "Zeus?" " Zeus:" "Yeah?" "There's something I have to tell you." " I'm sorry I didn't treat you so nice." " Yeah?" "I saw how the Bannisters were with you." "And I wanted that love all to myself." "I just figured if I tried to make you look bad, that it would make me look good." "But it backfired and now we're in this terrible mess." "The only good thing is it's made me realize how mean I was to you." "And how sorry l truly am." "Zeus:" "Looks like someone's grown up a bit." "Eve:" "I'll say." "Zeus:" "I'm sorry, too, Eve." " For what?" " I should've been more of a big brother to you instead of a competitor." "Truth is, Eve, I'm glad to have you as my little sister." "Eve:" "You really mean that?" "Zeus:" "Cross my snout and hope to fly." "Eve:" "I'm glad to have you as my big brother, Zeus." "I wish we had more time together." "This is the end of the puppy trail for us." "Zeus:" "I forgot to tell you rule number seven." "Even when all hope is lost, never give up." " Yeah, but" " Butts are for sniffing'!" "Now get your poker face on, little sister." "'Cause big brother's about to show you how to save Christmas Eve." "Eve:" "Cool." "Zeus:" "Follow my lead." "Eve:" "Okay." "I can do this, I can do this." "Oh." "( chiming )" "Tony Rowe's voice:" ""Christmas, 1:00 a.m. in the morning."" "Ted:" "We're late." "Ted, hurry up." "These guys gotta be sniffing glue or something." "I mean, I threatened them, right?" "Last couple of clowns that made me wait this long," " they got their thumbs plucked." " Yeah." "They're getting cured in a jar of pickle juice now." "Maybe they plan on keeping the star for themselves." "Man, they could've been halfway to Bolivia by now." "Yeah, whatever." "Hey, just goes to show you." "You know, if you want anything done right..." " you gotta do it yourself." " That's right, boss." "Make sure this thing is sharp." "Zeus:" "That's it." "Keep pulling, kid." "Almost free." "Eve:" "I think we make a good team." "Zeus:" "Whoo." "We did it." "Eve:" "Stupid ropes." "I'll show you." "Zeus:" "Come on, kid." "Forget about that stuff." "Eve:" "Oh, yeah, right." "Here we go." "Wait." "Ted, watch me." "The onion." "( glass breaking )" "( loud thump )" "( gasping )" "Stewey." " Yeah." " Beautiful." "Good job." "It's amazing." "Can I smell it?" "No, you're not gonna smell it." "We gotta get this to Tony Rowe." "Let's get out of here." "Zeus:" "Oh, yeah." "It might just work." "Eve:" "Taking a bath?" "( Zeus laughs ) Not quite." "We're gonna make these bubbles work for us." "Oh, and put these over your ears just in case." " Eve:" "No way." " Now's no time for pride, sis." "Speaking of which, excuse me for just a moment." "Eve:" "Hey, what about rule number two?" "Zeus:" "We're at war, right?" "And rule number eight is there are no rules during war, little sis." "Stewey:" "We did it, we did it." "Ted:" "The dogs got out." " ( yelling )" " Stewey, run!" "( Zeus, Eve barking )" "Ted!" "Ted!" "Ted!" "Ted!" "Ted!" "Ted!" " Ted!" " ( grunts )" "( barks )" "Ted, get up." "There's two of 'em." "Zeus and his clone." "I'm scared, Ted." "Okay, don't move." " ( barking )" " Ted, he's foaming." "Ted, that's rabies." "I saw "Cujo."" " That's a good movie." " I'm scared, Ted." " Stand your ground." " ( growling )" " Ted..." " Okay, okay." " I'm scared, Ted." " Wait a minute." "( sniffs ) That's not foam." "That's soap." "( sniffs ) You're right." "The high-end type." "Eve:" "Uh-oh." "Um, Zeus?" "All right." "Enough fun and games." "Nighty-night, sweet prince." "( high-pitched whining )" "Ted, it's not working." "I told you we should've tried it out." "Zeus:" "Antler muffs, fool." "Okay, enough of these baby games again." " ( barks )" " I'll strangle him with my bare hands." "I'll smash him." "I'm gonna commit a doggie homicide." "( grunts )" "( Tony laughing )" "Thought you were gonna sneak off on me, eh?" "( groans )" " Where's my star?" " It's right here, Mr. Rowe." "Ted:" "I got it right here for you." " There you go, sir." " Lou." "It's all forgiven, right?" "( laughing )" "This thing is a fugese." " Stewey:" "What?" "What?" " Ted:" "What?" "It's fake." "Forget about it." "These things are made out of glass." "Somewhere in China." " That can't be." " No, can be." "So much for legends." "Guess we're gonna have to settle for their thumbs." " Stewey:" "Don't!" "No!" " Don't do it!" "No, no, no, no, no!" "I get a pretty penny for them on the black market." "Hold on." "( humming )" "No, no, no." "It's okay." "Just think peaceful, loving thoughts." "Yeah, like that." "Zeus:" "Follow my lead, Eve." "It'll help you process the pain." " Come here." " No!" " Zeus:" "Timber!" " Eve:" "Whoo-hoo!" "Mikey:" "Boss, look out!" " ( sirens wailing ) - ( barking )" "I don't believe it." "Zeus saved us." " ( door opens )" " Police officers!" "Let's blow this joint." "Come on, let's go." " Hey, nobody move." " Hands in the air!" "No, go this way!" "Zeus:" "They're all yours, boys." "Me and my little sis took care of them." "Eve:" "Boo-yah." "Is that who I think it is?" "Partner:" "That's Tony Rowe, the infamous loan shark." "( officer grunts ) Infamous, huh?" " Where am I, Ma?" " Officer:" "Not quite." "( police radio chattering )" " Partner:" "Let's go." " Come on." "You're going downtown." "This way, Tony." "Ted, what do you see?" "I never saw these guys before in my life." " ( laughs ) I don't believe it." " What?" "Ted:" "Tony Rowe and his goons are gonna take the fall." " They're gonna take the rap." " ( laughs )" "Watch this." "They're probably gonna tell you they live here or something." "Don't believe them." "What's going on here?" "These two broke into the house." " On Christmas Eve?" " George:" "Yeah." "Happens to us all the time." "I was framed, lady." "I'm telling ya, I was framed." " I didn't do nothing." " ( laughs )" " I hope he rots in jail." " Shh." "Stewey, do you know what this means?" " What?" " We're free." "No more Tony Rowe, no more debt we owe anybody." "We can finally go where we always talked about going." " The Vatican?" " No, you idiot." "Miami." "Ah!" "That's where he hit me in the head with a shovel." "We frisked 'em good." "They're clean, thanks to these dogs." " The dogs?" " Yeah, it seems these two labs had a hand in stopping these guys." " I can't believe it." " Babs:" "Oh, my goodness." " Isn't that wonderful?" " ( barking )" "Eve:" "All in a day's work." " ( barking continues )" " Babs:" "You know," "I've got a date with a fuse box." "If you could just-- thank you." " Oh." " Let's go to jail, Tony." " ( Zeus barks )" " George:" "Hey." " Aw." " Hey, Zeus." "Daddy didn't mean to blow up on you." "No, Daddy loves you." "You know that." " ( Eve whines )" " And you, too, you little squirt." "Here, honey." "Take Eve, okay?" "Be careful." "Good boy, Zeus." "Wish I could say the same for you, George." "( sighs ) Belinda, please." "It's all gonna work out." "Trust me, okay?" " What is going on?" " I'm gonna let you know" " in about two minutes." " ( car approaching )" "Sarah Sattler?" " George Bannister?" " Yes." "Thank you so much for coming." "How could I not?" "I mean, I felt partially responsible for this whole misunderstanding." " Here it is, just like you wanted it." " Thank you." "Thank you so much." "Belinda, honey, this is Sarah." "Sarah Sattler, from Sattler Jewelers." "Formerly from Atlanta, but now we're here in Malibu," " living the good life." " Oh." "Oh, wow." "You were right." "What a dynamic smile." "I know." "First thing I fell in love with." "Plus, she's a little preggo, so she's glowing." "I'm really confused." "Oh, well." "Merry Christmas to you both." " Bye." " George:" "Thank you again." " George, what are you doing?" " ( car engine starts )" "I'm so sorry for sneaking around on you, but I wasn't." "But if I was, I'd be sorry." "But I wasn't." "I just wanted this to be a surprise." " What to be a surprise?" " Your anniversary gift." " Belinda:" "Oh." " Belinda Theodora Bannister, will you marry me again?" "Oh" " George." " You gotta read the inside." ""Love, your cuddly Georgie Porgie Bear."" "Oh, George." "I feel like such a fool." "Right?" "( gasps ) Is this from the" "Yeah, yeah." "That's from your earring." " The first gift I ever gave you." " The first gift you ever gave me." "Oh, George, this is so romantic." "I know, so what do you think?" "Yes!" "Yes, of course I will marry you again, George Bannister!" "( laughing )" "( beeps )" "( yells, laughs )" "They finally worked." "Yes!" "Yes!" "Well, better late than never." " Oh." " I concede, Babs." "You're smarter than you look, Ned." "Don't let it go to your head." "Halloween is right around the corner." "I know." "You know, there's a-- there's this big Christmas light convention in spring." "Top-of-the-line North Pole paraphernalia." "The one in Boston." "You know your stuff." "I always wanted to go." "I just didn't want to go alone." "Well, uh..." "I thought... maybe-- maybe the two of us" "I'd love to, Ned." " I love you, honey." " I love you, too." " ( whistling ) - ♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas ♪" "♪ We wish you a Merry Christmas ♪" "♪ And a Happy New Year. ♪" "Zeus:" "Merry Christmas to all..." "Eve:" "And to all a good night." "Stewey, you think that star ever really existed?" "( beeping )" "Ted:" "This is peaceful, huh?" " What'd you say, Ted?" " It's peaceful." "Yeah, it's okay." "( meter squeals )" "Ted:" "Stewey, you're always worried." "Gotta imagine, no more Tony Rowe, no more bathing stinking dogs." "Ted:" "Yeah." "Nice." "Ted:" "I say we made it." "I think we've made it." " Stewey:" "Look at it, huh?" " This is what it's all about." "Stewey:" "I don't know." "( music playing )" "( music playing )" "Like it?" "( laughing )" "Man:" "Ready, guys?" "( laughing )" " Man:" "Show her the-- - ( laughs )" "Man #2:" "All right, roll sound." "We're rolling." " Cain:" "Pull yourself together." " Keep smacking me." "Keep smacking me." "Keep smacking." "Cain:" "Stewey, come on." "Pull yourself together." "Keep smacking, keep smacking." "Backwards, the other-- with the backhand." "Cain:" "Pull yourself together, Stewey." "Woman:" "Aw." " Aw, she's very sweet." " Aw, she's so good." " She's so cute." " So sweet." "Aw, what a cute girl." "( laughing )" "Salud." "( laughs )" " Really?" " I had to." " In the middle of this?" " Listen to me." "I'm not finished." " Smell it." " I'm not only-  ( laughs )" " Smell that, live that." "It's lunch." "Diaz:" "Sorry about that." "No bueno." "The North Pole will be calling me about my strategy for" "( mumbles )" "Man:" "And, uh, try not to step away from your mark, okay?" "Madonne." " Man:" "You ready?" " ( laughs )" "( laughing ) What's the matter?"