"THE GIRL NEXT DOOR" ""In memory of André Brun, prince of the Portuguese comedians"" ""This film is set in less than 12 hours in the year of 1913, when all the young ladies in Lisbon played the piano - and terribly"" "BARBARIDADES THEATRE Great Success: "In the flesh"" "I have to go to Lisbon." "There's no doubt, I have to go to Lisbon." "It must be hell on Earth." "We can see it in the ads." "So, the little catechist wants a bit of sin?" "Me?" "On the contrary," "I just think they need to read my book," ""A Man's Duties as the Head of the family"." "And my Eduardo is lost in that babylon." "Maria!" "Look who's coming!" "It's my mistress!" "Jesus Christ!" "BARBARIDADES THEATRE Great Success: "In the flesh"" "Young ladies, don't look at these indecencies." " We were not looking." " We were just seeing." "But looking and seeing is only the beginning." " Mariana, haven't you listened to me?" " Yes, godmother." "Men are all alike," "Cunning, vain, depraved, banal" "always making disIoyaI rhymes" "Men are all alike" "Cunning, depraved, vain, banal" "always making disIoyaI rhymes" "Men are all alike" "You have a claque ticket and you're not clapping?" "I'm from the claque but I'm a professional." " What about the play?" " It's not bad!" "isabel and Eduardo must be very pleased today." "What!" "It's over between us!" "Go to your dear Catherine." " Good morning, Mr. Jerónimo." " Good morning, Mr. Mesquita." "And congratulations for "In the flesh" success." "Ah, yes, it was nice!" " Miss IsabeI is not at home." " Excuse me?" "She left half an hour ago." " That's all?" " Maybe it was 45 minutes." " I'm asking if she was going alone." " completely alone." " She didn't say where she was going?" " No, sir." "I was here polishing the bell, and she passed by and rudely said, "hello!"." " She didn't leave any message for me?" " No, sir." "I mean, when she left, the "hello" was for me, and the rudeness was obviously for you, sir." "Maybe she went to the theatre." "This early?" "There was no rehearsal today." "So, she didn't say a thing." "Not even that she was going to commit suicide." "Nothing!" "Eight days have passed and she didn't try to kill herself." "And she's hardly broken any crockery." "At least I haven't seen any in the garbage bin." "AII right, then..." "So Miss IsabeI didn't say she was going to end her life?" "No, not today." " Are at odds with each other again?" " Yes." "For a change..." "I spent the night out." "We had a terrible discussion about Catherine of Russia, and I Ieft very angry." "Knowing IsabeI's temper, why do you chase after women like that?" "What women?" " That Catherine." " Oh!" "If she's as good as an ironing-maid I used to know..." "No, this one was an empress." "Maybe it's not the same one." "And worst of all, I forgot my key." "There goes the next-door neighbour, that's all I needed..." "Have you ever seen anything like this?" "First thing in the morning with that silly trolaroh, laroh, laroh..." "It's adelaide's goddaughter, first floor on the right." "I've never seen that floozy, but, I'm telling you, one day, I'II lose control," "I'II knock on her door, and I'II ask her what right does that tart have to make hell out of everyone's lives?" "Listen, listen..." "Trolaroh, laroh, laroh, laroh..." "If you want my opinion, I also dislike pianos, it's nothing to do with the noise that doesn't bother me, but, when you move, pianos and cupboards always damage the staircases and scratch the walls." " Miss Maria!" " What?" "My mistress asks your mistress, if when your mistress's goddaughter speaks to my mistress's daughter, would your mistress, please, call my mistress with the clothes rod." "OK, I'II tell her." "But my mistress is going out with her daughter." " Oh, yes?" " Yes, she is." "tell me, do your mistresses treat you well?" "Yes, they do." "The house is very quiet, they're peaceful people." "We can't say the same about them." "Are there any news from the second floor on the Ieft?" "Jesus!" "There was terrible a fight last night!" "We could hear everything in the kitchen, near the chimney." "My mistress, Gertrudes, went to the pantry to listen to it." "You can't even imagine it, Mary." "It's always Mr. Saraiva's wife, she said awful things to him." "Oh, did she?" "And why did she do that?" "Why do you think?" "It's always about her jealousy..." "And it's all true, the man is very forward with women." "Every time he meets me on the staircase, he gives me such a stare..." "Speak of the devil!" "And he has the nerve to laugh!" "The devil is Mr. Saraiva!" "But when it comes to couples, those over there are like the ones from the first floor on the Ieft." "No wonder!" "With a reputation like that..." "She works in the theatre, she's one of those who show their legs." "Maybe he's not better than her." "Ten past eleven." "And IsabeI hasn't arrived yet." "I don't care whether she comes or not," "I only wanted the key to get in." "Mr. Jerónimo, do you want some advice?" "Never mess with women." "If you had told me that thirty years ago," "I would have thanked you, now there's no use doing it." "Why doesn't she stop playing that piano?" "I'm about to lose my temper, to kill the old hag, the girl and the piano." "Oh... come here." " Has the mail arrived yet?" " No, it hasn't." "Don't let the postman deliver a blue letter with a red stripe, smelling like violets, with Monsieur de Saraiva written on the outside." " Pardon me?" " It means Saraiva in French." "It's a friend from France, who writes to me without my wife's knowledge." "Listen carefully!" "blue paper, with a red stripe, Monsieurde Saraiva on the outside, and a Iot of trouble inside if my wife reads the letter." "Don't worry, sir." "Thank you very much, sir." "How are you my friend?" "Fine, thank you!" "How about you?" "My health is fine, it's the rest that's bad." " LeopoIdina knows about the French." " What French?" "MarceIIe, a delicious French lady whom I'm dating, she's crazy about me." " congratulations." " Thank you." "When we were deeply in love, my wife found out all about it." "She got mad, wanted a divorce and said she was going to kill herself, but, in the end, she didn't..." " That's the way it always is." " Excuse me?" "I was thinking of something else." "She did the same thing when she knew about the Spanish one." " You can't imagine, my friend." " Yes, I can, very well." "I'm also in trouble." "Here I am and I can't get inside my house." "really?" "Are you angry at each other?" "That's funny..." "Yesterday I went to Barbaridades Theatre, and isabel was in a good mood." "She's wonderful in this play." "Was it you who wrote it?" " Yes, it was..." " congratulations." "Thank you." "I was very pleased to see you." "Give my regards to IsabeI." "Goodbye, Mr. Jerónimo, and don't forget..." "He's a little devil, he had a Spanish lover, now he has a French one, someday he'II get in trouble..." "Someday, he'II be the Minister of Foreign Affairs." "What about IsabeI?" "Nothing." "almost half past eleven?" "Jerónimo, I'm starting to worry about her." "Don't worry, sir." "I don't know, maybe she threw herself onto the railroad tracks." "follow me wherever I go." "May I close the window?" "Tomorrow I'II come for the answer." "I'II have it." "There's no one there, what do you want?" "I wanted this novel signed." "Oh, is it an anonymous novel?" ""The children of the adulterous Virgin", by EmíIio Richebourg." "Tomorrow I'II come for the answer." "Don't bother, you can take it now." "tell your Richebourg that Mr. Mesquita is not home." "Excuse me." "To make my good mood complete all I needed was to read about the "adulterous virgin's" heartbreaks." "twelve o'cIock." "Where can IsabeI be?" "Mr. Mesquita, if you are always fighting so much why don't you ask for a divorce?" "I don't know..." "I Iive alone in Lisbon, my family lives in the countryside." "I came to Lisbon to study and started chasing women." "If my family knew, it wouId be a disaster." "My uncle is a catechist." "God save us!" "Now imagine, Mr. Jerónimo..." "What if all of a sudden he comes and discovers I never went to medical school..." "I see, I see..." "Then I started writing for the theatre and..." " And you met IsabeI." " exactly." "After six months, we were fed up with each other, but in spite of that, we haven't divorced yet." "She is always saying she never loved any man other than me." "That's just like her." "When it comes to nonsense, women are the best." "And she says that if I leave her, she'II throw herself into the river." "It's a tragedy." "The girl can't even swim." "I don't even want to think about it, I'm going to see if she's coming." "Laurentina!" "Laurentina!" "I'm coming, I'm coming." "Praise the Lord, at last." "How are you?" "Me?" "Fine, thank you." "And you?" "Do you know what mummy wanted?" " tell me." " Are you going out with Mrs adelaide?" "I'II just put my hat on, my godmother is almost ready." " We're going shopping." " I want to talk about it." "Mum read an ad about some fabrics which cost one gold coin per square metre." " One coin?" " That's true, one gold coin." "could you ask your godmother to let you get some samples?" " No problem." " Is it true about that?" " That what?" " You know..." "That..." " Oh, everything's the same." " Mrs adelaide Mendonça." " First floor on the right." "First floor on the Ieft." "Housewife and citizen." "It's Mr. Mesquita." "He went to the tobacco store." "Have you brought, by any chance, a letter in French for a gentleman called Saraiva?" "Excuse me?" "A letter smelling like violets." "No." "No smell." "I have nothing." "Goodbye." "I'II tell you later." "She hasn't tried to kill herself since last Friday." "I'II tell you the number of the store from the dining-room window." "AII right." "hello, Mr. Jerónimo." "How are you, Marianinha, How is Mrs adelaide?" "My godmother is fine, thanks." "The lady from the second floor has no luck with boyfriends." "Poor girl, the Iast one was..." "He was no good for her, a guy with no job yet." "How do you know that?" "Doesn't the doorman always know about the tenant's boyfriends?" "Not about mine you don't, Mr. Jerónimo." "It's true." "Marianinha is very comfortable for you." "They chase you all right!" "always hanging around you, but you... nothing." " I'm too young to marry." "Yes, but dating has nothing to do with marrying." "What are you doing, young lady?" "What are you doing on the staircase?" "I was talking to Mr. Jerónimo." " There's a letter for Mrs adelaide." " hello, Mr. Jerónimo." "Thank you." "Come, put your hat on." "What did Laurentina want from you?" "I'II tell you right away, godmother." "Good morning." "Has Eduardo arrived yet?" "hello, Mrs IsabeI." "We were expecting you." "Has Eduardo arrived?" "Have you seen that monster?" "Mr. Monster got tired of waiting." "He went to the tobacco store." "hello!" " What do you want from me?" " I want to go inside." "To finish torturing me, right?" "No, my child, to start my lunch." "So why didn't you get in and have lunch?" "I didn't have the key, otherwise..." " Otherwise what?" " Nothing." "Open the door." "The stairs weren't made to argue on." "What if I want to argue on the stairs?" "Why do you always have to impose your will?" "You're wrong." "My life of suffering is over!" "My day of independence has come." "You're very funny!" "careful, you might choke on that." " Take me to no. 13 CastiIho Street." " Yes, sir." " Let's go!" " No. 13 CastiIho Street is here." " Come on, young lady!" " I'm coming, godmother." " You're a bit of a peeping tom today." " What?" "What are you doing at the window?" " What?" "I wasn't at the window." " I saw you!" "I mean I was but it's as If I wasn't." "I opened it to air out the house." "Let's see..." "Whom did you spend the night with?" "I was alone at Ramiro's house." "It may be true, but I think it's a lie." " So what?" " So..." "I'd be happy with two scrambled eggs and a latte right now." "Right, you're only interested in me as a cook." " Shush, the neighbours can hear you." " I don't care about the neighbours." "Aren't you going to ask me where I went this morning?" "Not me." "Don't you care about where I went?" "Not really." "You're the Iast of the scumbags." "I totally agree, Iet's not talk about that any more." "Does Mr. Eduardo Mesquita live here?" "Yes, sir." "What do you wish?" "I'm his uncle." "PIácido Mesquita, catechist at FamaIicão High school." "What did you say, sir?" "I'm Mr. Eduardo Mesquita's uncle." " What floor does he live on?" " None of them." "But you said he lived here." "He used to live here but now he doesn't, he moved yesterday." " Sorry, isn't this no.13?" " No, sir, it's no. 31." "The coachman got confused." "You spend the night out, God knows in what kind of orgies." "You get home, you don't find me and you don't want to know what I did." " Just some foolishness." " unbelievable!" "So be it, I want to be honest with you." "It's all over between us." "Oh, come on, you always say that..." "Let's have lunch." "This time it's for real." " I Iove another man." " I'm sure I'II like him..." "Don't try to be funny, Eduardo." "When I saw him, I realised you meant nothing to me." "What more do you want?" "I already told you, two fried eggs would be fine." "What If I told you that when I was on the street, at a tram stop, a man stood next to me?" "That's what tram stops are for, I think." "Is it?" "And what do you think the man was doing there?" "Waiting for a tram, of course, Iike you." "And what if I told you he started looking at me and, when the tram arrived, he got in, too." "Maybe he lives in the neighbourhood." "You're wrong." "He sat next to me on the tram and he spoke to me." "What did he do?" "Recite poetry?" "No, he asked me if he could close the window." "Ah, he spoke in prose." "How prosaic." "When the conductor came, he waited for me to buy my ticket..." "Maybe he thought you were going to pay for his." "And after that, he bought a ticket for the same price, 30 cents." "They sell a Iot of those, these days." " The tram company is very pleased." " Yeah, yeah..." "When we were almost here, he sneaked his card into my bag." "Wait a minute, this is getting serious." "Ah, so now you're interested..." "That's it, it's the truth, he put his card in my bag." " And what did you do?" " Nothing." "You were all right with it?" " I was." " And you even brag about it." "CouIdn't you just grab the bag and hit the wise guy in the face?" "Not me." "First, that's a lie, and second..." " Let me see the card." " Ah, so it was a lie?" "Let me just say that the man came after me when I got off, he stopped here in front, surely waiting for me to come to the window." "But which number is that?" "I don't know, I can't read." "You should ask a policeman." "And where am I going to find a policeman?" "There are always some at the "Governo civil"." " And where is the "Governo civil"?" " It's down the street." " isabel, Iet me see the card." " I won't." "It's none of your business." "isabel, darling, give me the card and let's have lunch." "Come on, be a good girl." "Who's your little sweetheart?" "Who is he?" "Who is he...?" "Who is it?" "Mr. Eduardo, your uncle, the one who's a catechist in FamaIicão, has arrived and was downstairs looking for you just a while ago." "Oh, God damn him!" "And what did you say to him?" "I did my best to drive him off, but he'II be here soon." " Great!" " What about it?" "Let him come." "You wretch, can't you see that if my family knows I dropped out and we're living together, they'II cut my allowance and probably cut me into pieces too?" "My uncle, of all people, could never forgive such flaws." "A catechist, imagine that." "That's tough." "But what do you want me to do?" "I want you to vanish, to go away." "You were right when you said it was over between us.." "So this time it's for real." "I'II kill myself." "That's a good idea." "But before that, Iet's have lunch." "Mr. Jerónimo, if you can drive my uncle off for good," "I'II consider you my intimate friend forever." "Come on, Iet's go." "What nonsense!" "Let him come..." "Rest assured, I'II drive him off." "It's what I do best!" " What do you wish, sir?" " Come on," "I told you a thousand times, I'm Mr. Eduardo Mesquita's uncle!" " I wish to talk to my nephew." " And I told you a thousand times, sir, that your nephew no Ionger lives here." "He doesn't?" "Then why did I see him at the window just now?" "Oh, you did?" "You must be wrong." "It must've been the new tenant, who looks just like your nephew." "May I speak with him?" "Maybe he can tell me my nephew's new address." "The new tenant is not here." "He went out, there's no one here." " impossible, he was at the window." " Maybe you're wrong, maybe you didn't get a good look and it was the floor above." "Why don't you go there?" "Perhaps it wouId be better." "Me?" "No, I won't!" "Let me take a peek." "OK, but be careful." "If you don't want anything else, sir, I think you'd better leave." "I'm in charge of this building," "I can't allow strangers to go into the tenant's homes." "What?" "What did you say?" "isabel, are you sure it was him?" "Pretty sure!" "You can't forget a guy like that so easily." "He's the one who came after me on the tram and gave me the card." "Let me see it." "Without a doubt." "PIácido Mesquita, catechist in FamaIicão." "Is it arranged?" " What did you arrange with my uncle?" " Nothing." "I hadn't even seen that." "Your little uncle is a naughty devil." "It's arranged..." "I'II give you the arrangement, you catechist." " Eduardo, be careful." " Leave it up to me..." "OK, you're right, I'II leave right away." "uncle PIácido." "Are you in town?" "Eduardo, my boy, were you here after all?" "What did I tell you?" "What were you trying to do?" "uncle PIácido in Lisbon." "It can't be!" "It's me, it's me." "It was hard to find you, your doorman is a fool, either that or he's well disguised!" "I saw you at the window and he was telling me you'd moved out." "Sounds impossible!" "Oh, Jerónimo..." "please, go downstairs and bring the suitcases and packages from the car." "AII right." "Oh, please!" "So, my uncle is here." "Did you have a nice journey?" "No deraiIments?" " No, everything went fine." " What a pity!" "Pardon me?" "It's a pity you didn't tell me, I'd have met you at the station." "I arranged everything with your father to surprise you." "You did?" "Thank you very much." " Do you know Sequeira..." " Which Sequeira?" "The secretary at City hall, who was married to ApoIinário's daughter, who ran away with the tax collector, who played the guitar very well, don't you remember?" "I don't remember ApoIinário, nor the guitar, nor the tax collector." "But Sequeira came to Lisbon for two months and told your father he saw you more than once with a woman." " What?" "Me?" "What a scumbag!" " At what time does your train leave?" " What for?" "It's just that I can't leave town right now." "But I want you to slap that schemer twice for me." "Don't lose your temper, Eduardo." "Yes, I will." "Do that for me." "We'II have lunch downtown, and you'II leave on the first train." "And until I get a letter from you saying that you taught that scoundrel a lesson, I won't rest." "Sit down, Iet me finish." "I know your father's principles," " I myself, as you know..." " I know, uncle." "When Sequeira told him that, he got so angry that we had a family meeting on that same night." "We listened to everyone's opinions, and it was decided I should come to Lisbon to find out the truth." "I have to say that I did it unwillingly, because I hadn't come here since the Camões Festivities." "And I had many reasons not to." "I'm an old bachelor and a friend of yours." "If you had sewn some wild oats..." " You would have forgiven me, right?" " Forgiven you?" "Never!" "A catechist doesn't tolerate immorality." "Your house is beautiful." "From what I can see, this is the dining-room and the study-room." " What's in there?" " Don't go in there!" "That's my laboratory." "It smells like fried eggs." "It's true." "It smells like it, but it's not." "It's the smell of some medicines I'm studying." " Perhaps it's a medicine for weakness." " That's it." "It's powdered fried eggs." " Have you had lunch?" " Not yet, I was waiting for you." "For me?" "That's funny." "I was going to have lunch, but I was so happy to see you I lost my appetite." "I'm hungry as hell." "So let's have lunch downtown." "Can't you see I Iive here alone, uncle..." " I knew that." " Knew what?" "That you lived alone." "You know how people gossip..." "There's no doubt about that." "But now we're going to have lunch, OK?" "Wait, Iet your idiot doorman bring my suitcases... and the packages." "He's supposed to be here already." "True." "I forgot about that." "I'm going to see if he's coming." "Madam." " Come on, young lady!" " I'm coming, godmother." "Wait, Iet me help you, Mr. Jerónimo." "What's in the packages?" "Some copies of my book:" ""A Man's Duties as the Head of the family"." "Since I was coming to Lisbon, I brought some copies to offer to my friends and to some people I'm going to meet." "It was an excellent idea." "You can't imagine how many people in Lisbon want to read your books." "really?" "It wouldn't surprise me!" "tell me..." "Who's this lady?" ""To my dear friend Eduardo Mesquita," "ÂngeIa Pinto"." "ÂngeIa Pinto?" "That name sounds familiar to me." "Perhaps you know her." "She's a weII-known doctor." " There's an actress with that name." " Yes, indeed." "But that one I don't know." "I rarely go to the theatre." "That's very wise of you." "And this one here?" "That's Dr. José Ricardo, from the medical school." ""To Eduardo Mesquita, on his 15th 'In the flesh' "." "It's a medical magazine of which I am the editor." "And when the 15th issue was released, he offered me the portrait." "Very well, very well." "I see that you're very much respected by your teachers and by those who will soon be your colleagues." "Here in your laboratory..." "Your medicines now smell like latte." "That's strange." "EgotisticaI." "So, uncle, Iet's have lunch downtown." "You are well settled in." "It was hard to find your place, I found it almost by chance." "You naughty boy!" "Oh, my friend, I'm in trouble." " Shut up, you devil." " Excuse me?" " Has the mail arrived?" " Yes, but there was nothing for you." "careful, if my wife finds the letter, it'II be a disaster." "uncle, Iet me introduce you my friend and neighbour, Mr. Saraiva." "My uncle, PIácido Mesquita, catechist  catechist at FamaIicão High school." " Nice to meet you." " Sir." " Let's go." " Let's go." " please." " please." "Après vous, après vous." "My uncle who's a catechist, a catechist  has come to Lisbon to visit me." " Did you notice?" " No, I didn't." "So, sir, you have come to Lisbon to visit your nephew." "We are very pleased to have you here." " Mr. Eduardo." " What?" "Come here, please." "Excuse me." "uncle, you'II have to excuse me, I forgot something in the laboratory." "AII right, but don't take too long, I'm starving." "Just a moment, I'II be right back." "You stay here and don't let them come up." " When was your last time here?" " It was at the Camões Festivities." " That long ago?" " I remember the Festivities." "I've lost my taste for big cities." "Your nephew is a good man." "Have you seen "In the flesh"?" "Oh, I forgot you've just arrived." "No, but Eduardo told me about it." "So, do you get along with my nephew?" "We have an excellent relationship, as neighbours." "I would spent more time with him, if it weren't for my wife..." "Sometimes women work in mysterious ways." " Are you married?" " Not really." "I'm single, as much as possible." "Lucky you, my dear sir." "Lucky you." "I beg your pardon?" "I'm single, but I actually think that marriage is Man's great mission on Earth." "In FamaIicão, it may be..." "Do you know what marriage is in Lisbon?" "A terrible bore." "I'm sorry, but I can't agree with you." "You will, after meeting some women in Lisbon." "Haven't you heard that I'm a catechist?" "Yes, so what?" "There are also math teachers who can't even add." "Cut the crap, my dear friend." "How long will you stay?" " I'm staying for eight days." " Eight days, very well." "So, tomorrow you'II go see the Jerónimos and to Torre de BeIém, and then you'II visit the zoo." "And after that you'II have dinner with me at MarceIIe's house." " Who's that?" " She's a French girl." " Does she have a rooming house?" " No!" " So, what does she do?" " She takes care of me." "I protect her." " She calls me her petit chou." " Chou?" "Petit chou in Portuguese means "small cabbage"." "Oh, it does?" "I don't understand why that lady calls you a vegetable." "Because I protect her." " You?" "A married man?" " So what's the problem?" "You've never read my book," ""A Man's Duties as the Head of the family"." " Not me, thanks." " If you had, you'd see that I don't agree with that relationship of yours." "It's possible that I'II go to the Jerónimos, it's probable that I'II go to the Torre de BeIém, and I'II be very pleased to visit the zoo, but I'II never set foot" "in the house of that woman who calls you "cabbage"." "Excuse me, petit chou." "Petit chou that's what it is." "What the hell is going on in that laboratory, some disaster?" "In the laboratory?" "I locked the wild beast in there." "She didn't want me to go out." "OK, uncle, everything under control." "We can have lunch now." "What was that noise?" "Was it an explosion?" "What noise?" "I didn't hear anything." "Are you going to lunch downtown?" "If I didn't have a date with MarceIIe, I would go with you." "I'm very sorry." "Eduardo, I don't really like your friends." "Bad company will lead you to sin." "And ruin my plays." "Bastard!" "Monster!" "Come up here now." "Now!" "Now!" "Now!" "Are you talking to me, madam?" "Not to you, to that rascal, your nephew." "Eduardo, you had a woman in your house." "Me?" "No, sir." "Can't you see that your nephew lives on the Ieft side and that window is on the right." "Yes, left side, right." "And now which side is it?" "unless you tell me it's the fifth floor window." "Perhaps, I can't count very well." "I'm new in this building." "Eduardo, could you please explain it to me..." "If you're not coming, I'II throw myself out the window." "uncle, be patient, we'd better go upstairs, we're making a scene." "You better do that." "And you can bring that orangutan, we have some business to settle." "Orangutan?" "Did she call me orangutan?" "Never mind that, uncle." "Ignore it." "Mr. Saraiva, help us." " That's what friends are for." " please, come with us." "What's going on?" "Something wrong?" " Orangutan?" " The other one does the same thing." " The other one?" " My French girl." "When she's angry she doesn't call me petit chou, it's vieux saligaud." "calm down, calm down." "hello!" "hello, how are you?" "Have you been all right since I last saw you?" "Sorry, madam, I haven't had the pleasure of meeting you yet." "Pretend you don't know me." "hello, Mr. Saraiva, how are you?" "Fine, thank you, isabel." "Is there everything fine?" "If you came to take your nephew back because he lives a sinful life, you can take him." "You're as good as he is." "Lady!" "This catechist came all the way from Rossio flirting with me on the tram." " That's not true." " Look, here's your card." "The one you gave me on the tram." "Don't deny it." "PIácido Mesquita, catechist at FamaIicão High school." "That's my card, but..." "And on this side it gets worse." "Read it." ""It's all arranged."" "It's your handwriting, I know it very well." "This must be a terrible misunderstanding." " Just confess." " You rascal from FamaIicão." "What did I tell you about Lisbon women?" "I confess that I followed this lady, but I was only looking for a flirtation with no consequences." "You rude man!" "I have to find out if everything your parents were told is true." "Sequeira was right." "I don't know who's Sequeira, but it's true." " So what?" " So, my mission in Lisbon is over." " Tomorrow I'II go back to FamaIicão." " Have a nice trip." "Take your nephew with you to return him to his family because I don't want him." " What?" "That's right, your nephew is the worst of the shameless." "Don't say that, isabel, you'II disappoint my uncle." "I say it and I'II repeat it." "He cheats on me every day of the week." "darling, don't exaggerate." "And on top of that, he has an affair with the girl next door." "But what if I told you I've never talked to her, never even seen her." "And I came so far to listen to this." "And I'm telling you that I no Ionger work for you." "What?" "She also writes for the medical magazine?" "medical magazine?" "No, isabel is talking about your nephew's play at the Barbaridades Theatre." " Yes, yes..." "Do you think Eduardo goes to medical school?" "No." "He enrolled and went there for three days, but after that he dropped out." "And now he writes nonsense for the theatre." "Very well, my boy..." "And I acted in them plays." "What do you have to say?" "When you tell this story in FamaIicão, it'II be a success." "Eduardo, is this true?" "As true as you flirting with this lady on the tram." " That's not the problem here." " Yes, it is!" "I'm leaving your nephew, you must understand that I can't be left alone." " Yes, and what then?" " What then?" "So, you wooed me, followed me home, asked me in writing if it was arranged." "So, now" "I'm telling you that it is arranged and I'II follow you everywhere." "It's a good idea." "But I'm going back to FamaIicão this afternoon." "I'II pack and go with you." "That's crazy, it's a small town." "It may be small, but there's room for two." "If it's not consensual, it'II be by force." "I'II tell everyone in FamaIicão that you stalked me." "Very well." "And when you go to your classes," "I'II show your students this card and tell them how their catechist practices his morals in Lisbon." " I'II deny it." " I have witnesses." "Mr. Jerónimo, come up here, please." "Haven't I told you that the first thing to do in Lisbon is to see the Jerónimos?" "The doorman will say if it's true or not that you followed me here." "You were snooping around and you waited for me to go to the window." "Come in, Mr. Jerónimo." "tell me." "Is it or isn't it true everything I just said?" " Say yes." " Yes, it's true, madam." "See?" "The testimony is overwhelming." "Don't make me crazy." "Let's see if we can fix this." "Let's sit down and talk." " You don't need me anymore?" " The witness is excused." "With your permission, then." "What a scoundrel you are!" "What do you have to say, young elder?" " First things first." " Yes, uncle." "From this story, we can gather that your parents sent you to Lisbon to attend medical school, and you got a degree in Anatomy." "Anatomy is what he knows best!" "Be polite, it doesn't take much effort." "And you live with this woman in an immoral situation." " So far so good." "Even Neves knows it." " What?" "Which Neves?" "You don't know him, uncle." "He isn't from FamaIicão." "Is that so?" "You know your parents very well, it wouId kill them if I told them that not only haven't you studied in more than two years, but you also violently despise the principles they taught you during your childhood," "living an depraved life, etc, etc, etc..." "So, I won't say a thing about your life." " Bravo!" " Very well." " However..." " Very well, Mr. Mesquita, very well." "But let's talk about serious things." "First, isabel will make amends with Eduardo." "And then we'II have lunch." "Leave the speeches for your students." "You're demoraIised." "You fell for the bait and you're lost." "In eight days you'II forget about FamaIicão." "Don't tell me that." "I have an entire life of discipline in my favour." "Come on, come on..." "From the moment you set foot in Lisbon you've been playing the devil." "It's the climate, believe me." "Just like the climate in Caneças is good for the weak, the Lisbon climate is bad for the lazy." "Damned Lisbon!" "Why damned?" "Never mind." "well, are we going to have lunch or not?" "Yes, at Ieast that." " isabel..." " What, you pervert?" "tell me what you want but don't talk to me." "Fix us all a little lunch." "Excuse us, uncle, we have a cleaning lady, Quitéria, but she hasn't arrived yet." "fortunately, isabel is a damn good cook." "A damned slap is what you need." "We'II have some steaks, some eggs, and some canned sardines." "Saraiva is also staying for lunch." "Thanks, I've already had lunch, but I'II keep you company." "Wait a bit." "I have to send the doorman shopping." "Give me some money, at Ieast two crowns." "Money?" "Oh, yes!" "uncle, do you have ten coins you can lend me?" "Ten coins?" "Yes, I do, of course." "It's not convenient for me to change large bills after the 25th." "Mr. Jerónimo, could you please come up here?" "Even though you're from FamaIicão, I can see that you're broke." "Me?" "What an idea!" "I just gave her ten coins for shopping, didn't you see?" "Mr. Saraiva, what do you think?" " Youth is like the lotus flower." " Is it?" "I didn't know that." "Mr. Jerónimo, do me a favour..." "Go to the grocery store and then to the butcher and bring me..." "It'II be fun, you'II see." "Tonight we'II go to the theatre to see my play." "Tomorrow we'II go to CaciIhas..." "Take your coat off, make yourself comfortable!" "Good idea." "Of course, give it to me." "Go quickly, OK?" "Come on, help me, open the cans of jelly." "Let's go!" " MarceIIe is the only one missing." " What's missing here is decency!" "well said, you shameless man." "If you had seen him on the tram with his beady eyes staring at me..." " So, "it's settled"..." " Let us not talk about that any more." "You understand, Eduardo, don't you?" "I didn't know..." "Of course, my uncle..." "Mrs Gertrudes, please come in." "Mrs adelaide, haven't you noticed the noise next door?" "Today they went too far." "They're a scandal in this building." "I've noticed that." "But I'm not surprised." "He's a dandy and she's one of those who work in the theatre showing her legs to everyone." "Gosh, ma'am." "That's awful!" " She's so irritating and annoying." " He's very nice." "Be quiet, young lady." "A man with no goals in life can't be a nice person." "That may be so, but he has really beautiful eyes." "Stop it!" "When did you see his eyes?" "A while ago..." "What he is, is a rude man." "The other day, on the stairs, when he was passing by, I dropped my bag." "He picked it up, took his hat off and handed it to me." "I didn't say a single word." "I took the bag, looking down, and went up the stairs." "Do you want to know what that pig said to me?" "He said, with a smile, "Thanks a Iot, madam, don't bother."" "What do you think of that cheeky guy trying to teach me manners?" "I can't get the idea out of my head that it was she who sent us that box with the mouse inside during carnival." "I laughed so much I started crying, it was very funny." "You should've seen my godmother." "She even showed her knickers." "And what's wrong with that?" "I showed my knickers to a mouse." "Besides, he was very small." "With some lessons, you'II become a fuII-fIedged dandy." "Here are the steaks." " Eduardo, go fetch the butter." " Where is it?" "It's in the hat box, because of the ants." "What a mess!" "This mess, PIácido, my friend, is called happiness." "Eduardo, don't be so clumsy." "You'll spill that." "Darned people!" "This is outrageous." "Who would have thought that I would be having lunch with my nephew's concubine!" "Do they call them that in FamaIicão?" "Poor girls." "Cut the nonsense, my friend." "I'II get 10 cents worth of hot pepper." "When I started having huge amounts of hot pepper at home," "I stopped being happy." "well, the hors d'oeuvres are almost ready." "I almost forgot the toothpicks." "Oh..." " What is it?" " Sorry?" "It's nothing, Iet's set the table." "Madam." " It's the next-door neighbour." " Is it?" "Marianinha is very beautiful, don't you think?" " Who's Marianinha?" " Who could it be?" "The girl next door." "Yes, she is." "She's so sweet." " You're in love, my friend." " In love, me?" "You are falling for the girl next door, my friend." "Lower your voice, for God's sake." "Do you want the eggs fried or scrambled?" " Fried, for me." " And for me, too.." "AII right." "Confess, Eduardo, you are falling for the girl." "It's quite understandable." "I confess." "I had never seen her, I even hated her because of the piano." "We looked at each other in the hall and I went head-over-heeIs." "Those black, serene eyes, that smile she threw at me without my asking for it." "I think she's wonderful." "Now I even think the old lady is really nice." "Excuse me." "isabel, here's the pepper." "4.25 plus 3 minus 1, minus a coin, it's right, it's 18 coins." "well, Iet's have lunch." "A big tragedy will happen in this house." "Why?" "Aren't the steaks any good?" "I'II serve it like this, you're family." "Oh, please..." "Here it is, here comes the tragedy now." "You dog!" "Give me that." "Excuse me." "Olé!" "Not all is lost." " What's going on, Mariana?" " It's nothing, godmother." " What's going on, young lady?" " What's that on your face?" "That's disgusting!" "What happened?" " Jesus!" " It's eggs, madam." " Eggs?" "Whose eggs?" " Fried eggs with butter." "Go on, speak up." "What happened?" "I don't know." "I was at the window and someone threw this in my face." "Threw it?" "But who did it?" "Who's throwing eggs in people's faces?" "I don't know who did it, I didn't see." "If you didn't see, how do you know that they were thrown?" "I don't know, godmother, I don't know." " Let's see which window it came from." " Don't go there, godmother, don't go." "Why?" "They were thrown from over there." "From next door?" "From that tart's house?" "Yes, godmother." "They had hot pepper on them too." "How did it happen?" "tell me!" "That woman is completely mad, now she throws eggs in the neighbours' faces for no reason.." "And fried with butter, no less." "And smelling like 18 cents a kilo, madam." "Don't ask me, I don't know how it happened." " The worst stains are from the yolks." " We must clarify this." "There is something going on here." "We've never had trouble with the neighbours." "Not even with neighbours like those." "It's easy to see that she doesn't work for a living." "Her Majesty throws eggs out the window, and they're so expensive, 18 cents a dozen." "We're not going out anymore." "I can't leave things like this." "Maria, call the doorman." "I shall complain to the landlady." "Either they leave or I'II make a scene." "If you please..." "The doorman is coming from over there." " Do you need anything?" " Yes, I do, Mr. Jerónimo." "Excuse me." "Jesus, madam, they're yelling like fools." "close the door and go into the kitchen." "Come here, Mr. Jerónimo." "Things can't go on like this." "What do you mean, Mrs adelaide?" "The indecency that goes on in this building." "When I rented this place, I couldn't imagine that things would be like this." "Back then, the neighbours were decent people." "And you remember who lived there." "Mr. SaIema, the crippled man." "That's the one." "He was a quiet man." "We couldn't hear a noise from his apartment." "He never went to bed late." "He never went out." "I only saw him leave the house on the day he was buried." "I suspect it was the undertakers who upset him." "Now it's a living hell, listen." "They have visitors at all hours, they only go to bed the next morning, they are always yelling, and on top of everything else, they even throw eggs out the window." " Look at this, Mr. Jerónimo." " I see, I see." "Miss IsabeI has such a temper..." "Is her name IsabeI?" "Does she have a bad temper?" "I'II teach her a lesson." "Mr. Jerónimo, you'II take a letter to the landlady." "She was already angry at Mr. Eduardo." " His name is Eduardo?" " What do you have to do with that?" "When she caught Mr. Eduardo looking at  what he was looking at, she went out to the balcony and..." "She threw the first thing she could find." "And since she was coming from the kitchen with the eggs..." "If I hadn't stopped her, she would have thrown the steaks too." "And probably the latte too." "As far as I can see, she's like a take-out restaurant." "I'II teach her a lesson..." "Wait..." "I had another idea." "The landlady isn't enough." "Mr. Jerónimo." "call a policeman for me." " A policeman?" " Yes, a policeman." "What for, madam?" "Don't you think she'II be laughing at us?" "You're at home, minding your business, and you get a mess of eggs in your face." "No, she will know who adelaide da Purificação Mendonça is." " Do you know who my father was?" " I didn't have the pleasure." "He was a notary in Rua da Prata." "When he died, he was about to become a judge of the Santíssimo Brotherhood." "It was a pity." "Who is it?" "It's Mrs Gertrudes, please come in." "What's going on, Mrs adelaide?" "Mrs Gertrudes, we are very busy here." "Is it true, dear?" "Your maid told my maid." "I can't believe it." "Did she throw the eggs just like that?" "Just like that." "I'm going to complain to the landlady." "That's the right thing to do." "I called Mr. Jerónimo to get me a policeman." "Mr. Jerónimo, do me that favour." "Get me a grumpy one, will you?" "Try to find one with a goatee." "A man who commands respect." "But madam, couldn't you just forget about the eggs?" "Mrs IsabeI was angry, maybe..." "Maybe what?" "You must be in it together." "You're as good as she is." "But leave it up to me." "I'II tell the landlady everything." "And if you don't want to go, the maid will." " Maria." " Madam?" "Bring me the first policeman you can find." " What, madam?" " You're going to get me a policeman." "Not that, ma'am." "I'm sorry, but I swore never to talk to a policeman again." "Why?" "Because." "That's funny." "Funny?" "I didn't find it funny." "Was it the one with the hairy mole on his the face?" "Yes, that's the one." "well, you can leave.." "And since Mr. Jerónimo is on the side of those shameless people," "I'II go to the police station myself and I'II talk to the corporal." "I once complained to the corporal myself and no good came from it." "settle down, Mrs adelaide, I don't want us to have any trouble." "Here I go." "I said that to avoid noise in the building and gossip in the neighbourhood." "But since Mrs adelaide is so keen..." "well then, that's all I needed." "Being offended in such a way." "It had to be me!" "Mrs Gertrudes, do you know who my father was?" "You have told me a couple of times." " He was a Brother of Santíssimo." " From a good family, you can see." "well, here I go." "Don't take too long." "I'd better tell Mr. Mesquita." "So, is IsabeI calmer now?" "Now she started crying." "If you'II excuse me, I think you should apologise to the ladies." "Mrs adelaide is rabid as a dog." "She even sent for a policeman." " A policeman?" " A policeman with a goatee." "A goatee?" "I almost choked on the goatee." "I came from FamaIicão for this..." "That's no use now, Mr. Jerónimo over here is right." "You should apologise to the ladies, and you should be the one to go since you're the most respected." " Me?" " Good idea." "Let uncle go." "Since they don't know you, maybe they'II accept your excuses." "Come on, Mr. Mesquita, if it's necessary I'II go there and help." "And when everything is settled, I'II go there myself." "I'II call the policeman after all." "I almost forgot, I brought the samples you asked for." "I'm much obliged." "Do you want to see them?" " Come inside." " AII right." "Ladies, if anyone knocks, don't open, I want to speak to the policeman." "Yes, godmother." "Suits her good, she deserves to be arrested." "Since she came here this building" "I couId never find myself another boyfriend." "Do you know why she threw the eggs in my face?" "Because she was either crazy or drunk." "Just because I was looking at Eduardo and he was looking at me." "But who's Eduardo?" " It's him." " Him who?" "Who could it be?" "It's him." "When a girl says "It's him" about a man, you know who it is." "It's the man she loves." " But do you love a man?" " Yes." " For a Iong time?" " For 45 minutes." "How is that?" "tell me, where did you meet him?" "I met him on the stairs, and then I saw him again at the window." "Right after that I got the eggs all over my face and that was it." "But what does the girl with the eggs have to do with your young man?" "The young man isn't mine, he's hers." "Do you love the actress's husband?" "I do, why?" "But why?" "Because he likes me." " Did he tell you that?" " Yes." " He spoke to you?" " silently." "But if you saw his face when he saw me at the stairs and the window, you wouldn't doubt me." "That boy likes me and, because of that, I Iike him too." "You speak as if the other girl didn't exist." " Oh, he's going to leave her." " How do you know that?" "Because I know he doesn't want to hurt me.." "Are you insane?" " Who can it be?" " Maybe, it's the policeman." "Go and see, Mrs Gertrudes." "Ladies." " The doorman..." " please, come in." "It's an undercover policeman." "I asked Mr. Jerónimo to bring me one of his colleagues in uniform." "In uniform?" "I don't get it." "I'm here because of that wretched incident earlier on, those eggs." " That's it." "I see you already know." "My nephew begged me to come here." "My job is not exactly this." "Yes, I see, you're from the secret services." "Are you the doorman's uncle?" "No, madam, I'm afraid not." "I'm an uncle, but from over there." " There, where?" " There, where the eggs came from." "Oh really?" "How are you?" "Give me your hat, please." "Thank you, miss." "Can you make anything of this?" "No." "gentleman, explain yourself, please." "I would rather speak to you alone." "well, in that case, we'II leave." "See you later, my friend." "If you need something, just knock." "Thank you." " Goodbye, dear." " Goodbye, Mrs adelaide." " Can't my goddaughter be here?" " It's not a good idea." "It is a matter of great..." " Mariana, go away." " Yes, godmother." " gentleman." " Young lady." "You were saying that..." "Madam, I'm your neighbour's uncle." "I won't congratulate you on that." "So what?" "I'm in charge of a diplomatic mission  and a nasty one." "You want to know if we liked the eggs?" "well we didn't, sir." "And since you, sir, are related to that nut house, and those indecent people, you can leave the same way you came." "And tell that herd of barbarians that we'II settle this at the precinct." "That's precisely what I wish to avoid." "Can't you see that I'm from the countryside?" "And I must confess, the Lisbon police scare me to death." "The same can't be said about the girl who throws eggs out the window." "And she wanted to throw the steaks, too." "After all I couId always save one, but not without a Iot of nerve." "well, that beast will calm down once she sees the policeman I sent for." "He has a goatee." "A goatee." "Oh, my God!" "But I'm here to apologise a million times, madam, a million or two million, whatever you wish." "It was neither my nephew's fault nor mine." "And we're ready to give you every explanation." "I think I know who your nephew is." "As for you, sir, I don't know you." "It's the first time I've seen you." "Madam, I swear I'm a decent man." "I'm from the countryside, as I have told you before." "I have just arrived in town." "My name is Mesquita." "I'm catechist." "Mesquita..." "For a catechist, you're dealing with the wrong people." "I'm not convinced by those stories." "You'II see who's adelaide Mendonça." "adelaide Mendonça?" "It can't be." "I've never been so humiliated." "My father..." "Do you know who my father was?" "No, madam." "I arrived today." "On the 10:40 a.m. train." "well, I'II just let you know that my father was a notary, he could be a judge in Santíssimo da Pena's Brotherhood, were he alive." "Notary?" "Of the Santíssimo?" " It is her?" " Her who?" "During the Camões' Festivities did you live on the ground floor on Four Paths Crossroads?" "Yes, I did." "Why?" "I'm PIácido Mesquita, I came from FamaIicão." "PIácido!" "It's you!" "Yes, It's me." "Oh, a ghost from the past!" "adelaide, bring me a glass of water, because I can feel the damn steak stuck in my throat." " Maria." " Madam?" "A glass of water." "Leave a bit for me." "What are you thinking about, PIácido?" "About destiny..." "The way I've found you after so many years..." "Sometimes I thought you were dead." "Thank you very much, so did I." " I thought you'd married." " So did I." "And after all, as far as I can see, you are alive." "And still single." "I'm also alive and single." "But now that I remember, you were infamous." "Yes, I was.." "It's true, I had forgotten about that." "That's all in the past." "It was all so quick, so sudden." " Now that you're old..." " Not old." "I'm the same age as you." "Sorry, now that you've grown up..." " That's it." " It all seemed like a dream." "Our love lasted for 15 days, if that." "The festivities season." " l met you one morning." " It was in the parade, in Chiado." "I was with my papa." "I was alone, my father had died." "You looked at me and I didn't know what I felt." "I know, I felt scared to death of your father." "You followed me all day long, and that night I waited for you after papa had gone to bed." "How foolish of me." " Do you remember?" " Of course!" "You were the first woman I'd ever spoken to, other than my mother." "I was so sleepy and so afraid..." "Those places were creepy." "That was why, you naughty boy, on the next night, when you saw some silhouettes approaching, you climbed up to the window sill." " l almost fell." " You fell into my arms." "Then I was even more afraid of your father." " What a anguishing night." " What a delicious night." "adelaide, despite all that, at some point I lost my mind and..." "If I had lost only that..." "I Ioved you so madly, PIácido." "You came back another three or four nights." "And then, suddenly, you never returned." "The Crossroads had four paths." "I took the one to FamaIicão." "fortunately, no one discovered our secret." "Since you didn't answer my letters," "I stopped waiting for you to remember me and to come back." "And you never did come back." " I came today." " Why did you take so long?" " Look, the girl who took my eggs..." " What about her?" " Is she my..." " Oh no..." "She's my goddaughter." "Someone I got to keep me company when I stopped waiting for Camões' Festivities." "Who is it?" "Do you want me to open it, godmother?" "It must be the policeman." "Just a moment." "Is my godmother calmer?" "I think she's a bit  tougher." "Oh, it's Mr. Saraiva." "How are you, Mrs adelaide?" "How are you, Marianinha, since I saw you just now?" "Let me introduce you to PIácido," "I mean, Mr. PIácido Mesquita from FamaIicão." "Mr. Saraiva, our neighbour." "But we just met about an hour ago." "Did we?" " I didn't know." " It's true." "Mesquita, haven't you told her yet?" "I haven't had time yet." "I was also over there when the eggs situation occurred." "What are you saying?" "please, sit down." "Eduardo told me to ask Mrs adelaide's permission to give his apologies." " Perhaps it's not necessary." " Poor boy." "Don't be so hard, adelaide." "Can you assure me that it's all over between him and that woman?" " Of course." " That's all I needed!" "Mr. Eduardo is an honourable man." " Let him come in." " Godmother!" "Excuse me." "Eduardo, you can come in now..." "Madam..." " isabel is the only one missing." " Good Lord!" "How are you?" "My dear sir, your uncle told me that you want to apologise." "I accept your apologies." "How are you?" "Come here, Mr. Eduardo." "With adelaide's consent, I'II introduce you to Mariana." "Our neighbour, Eduardo Mesquita." "Our Eduardo." "That's it, Mrs adelaide, there's nothing like having good neighbours." " You make friends with people." " There's no doubt." "really?" "I swear." "I have something to tell you, Mr. Saraiva." "Yes, madam, tell me." "It's just that..." "I've known Mr. Mesquita for a Iong time." "What are you saying?" "That's very funny!" "And between us, that's the bottom line." "That's true, see how things are!" "So is it true that you Iike me?" "would you be angry if I didn't?" "Yes, I'd be furious." "Is that your piano?" "Yes." "I Iove to hear you play." "As far as I can recall, and it seems funny to tell it now..." "We even dated for a while." "Didn't we, Mr. PIácido?" "I remember vaguely." "It was a Iong time ago." "Maria, see who's there." "Miss adelaide, the policeman is here." "What policeman?" " The one you sent for." " Me?" "Oh, yes." "I forgot about that." "You're not needed anymore, officer." "Maria, give that policeman five coins." "Me, madam?" "only if it is to have him shot!" "I don't want to mess with policemen." "Not on my Iife!" "Goodness gracious!" "Go away, you devil!" "I'm sorry buddy, we don't need you anymore." "Is it?" "That's good." "That can be arranged." "It' even better, because I don't like getting into trouble." "Excuse me, but a policeman shouIdn't think like that." "I know, but I wasn't made for this job." "I always wanted to be a church-cIerk, which was my first job." "I joined the police because I was scared of robbers." "That's funny." "It's not funny, it's my nerves." "If you hadn't told me that this was about an egg situation between ladies," "I wouldn't have come." "I wasn't cut out to deal with violence." "Who are you looking for?" "Doesn't Mr. Saraivah live here?" "Saraivah?" "Not here." " Isn't this no. 13?" " Yes, it is, sir." "Doesn't a gentleman called Saraivah live on the second floor on the Ieft?" "Saraiva?" "Oh, Mr. Saraiva." "Yes, sir." "Go up, please." "Wait!" "Mr. Saraiva is not at home." "Do you have something for him?" "Yes I do, sir." "So give it to me and I'II deliver it to him." " I can't." " You can't?" "Why not?" " It's verbal?" " verbal?" "Yes, sir." "It's verbal." "To be more precise, we need to talk." "tell me the message and I'II give it to Mr. Saraiva." " I can't." " You can't?" " Why?" " Because it's a secret." "Women." "Women?" "Get out of my sight." "Was it a French lady who sent you here?" "How did you know?" "Never mind." "tell that lady that Mr. Saraiva is not in Lisbon." "He went to Oporto." "He died!" "Died?" "Yes, he died yesterday." "Poor man." "I never saw him but he seemed a nice person." "well, I'II tell the lady." "Don't bother then, for God sake." "Excuse me." "The devil be damned!" "May God help me!" "Jerónimo, my friend, big news." "If you don't need me, I'II leave now." " What harm could I do to this maid?" " Goodbye, my friend." "Be patient and excuse me for bothering you." "Oh, by the way, a man came with a message for you just a while ago, but I didn't let him come up." "Since it was a verbal message, he didn't want to give it to me." "Thank you, Jerónimo." "You did the right thing." "If my wife knew about it, I would get into trouble..." "What happened to Mesquita's wife?" " Mrs IsabeI?" " Yes." "She left very angry and up till now..." "She left completely enraged." "Do you know what happened because of the egg prank?" "No." "Her fellow is completely in love with that girl over there." "The girl next door?" "And she's also in love with him." "They're over there talking to each other." "What about her godmother, what did she say?" "Nothing." "I think she likes it." "She's over there talking to his uncle." " To the catechist?" " Yes." "It seems that they already knew each other, they even dated once." "To not ruin their romance, I Ieft when she was saying:" ""Oh, Mr. PIácido, Mr. PIácido, I feel 30 years younger"." "And he smiled and nodded." "He seems a very gentle man." "You'II see." "This will end with two marriages." "Yes, I think so, too." "Adversity never comes alone." "I can't believe it." "What a ridiculous story." "I should tell my wife about it." "Maybe it's better if I tell MarceIIe first." "What do you think?" "It's better if you tell it to IsabeI who is just arriving." "meanwhile, I'II be leaving." " Good afternoon, isabel." " Good afternoon." "This could be the end of the world." "hello, Mr. Saraiva." " So, you're here!" " That's right." " Do you know where Eduardo is?" " Which Eduardo?" "Which one could it be?" "Mine." "It's not Edward VII." "Oh, yes, I don't know..." "or should I say I know?" "He went out." " Went out?" " Yes." "AII right." "please, come in." "Excuse me." " So you didn't commit suicide?" " What for?" "For nothing." "Just to pass the time." "would you kill yourself over a man?" "No, I wouldn't." "Are you insane?" "You think I would do that?" "kill myself at 25 over a man." "Ah, wait until you're 80." "Then it'II do you good." " only fools kill themselves." " You think so?" "What I heard is that they ask God to kill them, but He doesn't listen to them, that's why there are lots of them in good health." "On the way, I made a decision and that's why I came home." "Decisions should not be made when one is not used to make them." "I want to listen to your advice." "What would you do if you were me?" "If I were you?" "Sorry..." " If I were you?" " Since you're not a woman you can't know how it is to be cheated on by a man." "But since I'm a man, I know what it is to be cheated on by a woman." "I assume it must be the same." "Yes, something like that." "tell me..." "What do you think?" " In fact, I don't know.." " No?" "There are two options." "Either do something stupid, or think it over." " Are you going to do the former?" " No, I thought about it." "I realised that I didn't have the right to do that just now." "That's why you did it." "Maybe there's nothing between Eduardo and that girl." "I agree." "He had never noticed her, he didn't know her, he really couldn't stand her." " really?" " Yes, it was the piano." "Speaking of the devil!" "I'm sure that if Eduardo were home, listening to that waltz, he would have a stroke." "I would bet my head on it." "Don't bet, unless you have another one." " What did you say?" " Nothing." "I was only saying that one must never bet his head." "It's something that's no use to the winner, and the loser really needs it." "I must admit that I overreacted." "that the girl was cheeky, looking at him that way." "But it was my fault, and I'm willing to apologise to those ladies." "should I go there now?" "What do you think?" " I'd Iike to see that!" " So would I." "There's nothing nicer than a polite person." "It seems they're in a good mood." "The girl is playing the piano." "She got it wrong again." "If Eduardo could hear her, he would shoot her." "Yes, yes..." "tell me something, Mrs IsabeI." "What if Eduardo is really in love with the girl next door?" "How?" "It can't be..." " It's impossible." " I know, but if the impossible didn't happen," "life would be so boring." "Imagine that he's enjoying listening to that waltz..." "She got it wrong again." " Mr. Saraiva, are you kidding?" " Of course." "But imagine that he was in love with the girl, that he tried to talk to her and was well accepted, and that our neighbour is also in love with him." "Can you tell me why should I imagine that?" "Just for us to talk." "would you mind if I imagine another thing?" " would you get angry?" " Of course, what do you think?" "What if you knew that Eduardo had gone, only as an assumption, to apologise to those ladies?" "would you mind that?" "Of course." "What if someone would tell you that Eduardo is near the piano, which stopped just now, and that at the end of this sweet waltz, he was holding the pianist's hand saying:" ""Bravo!" "Bravo!"" "What would you think?" "That either he's stupid, or he's deaf." "What if you saw him saying goodbye to her?" "What the hell!" "... kissing her hand." " Do you want to know what I'd do?" " It'd be a tragedy." "I think it was all my fault." "You'II see." "So, is it true?" "I swear it's not." " Are you swearing?" " What do you want me to do?" "Maybe she'II believe it." "So is it all true, Eduardo?" "AII what?" "What Mr. Saraiva was telling me." "Sorry, isabel." "Sometimes I don't know what I'm saying." "Is it true?" "Come on." "Answer." "Yes." " Did you go there to apologise?" " Yes." " Did you talk to her?" " Yes." " Did you listen to the waltz?" " Yes." " Did you Iike it?" " Yes." "You bastard!" " Mr. Saraiva was right." " That...?" "Eduardo is in love with the neighbour." "Don't deny it." "It's written all over your face." "well, I know what I have to do." "It's obvious that one of us will have to leave." "What nonsense were you imagining?" "I mean her no harm." "Why?" "It was destiny." " What do you intend to do?" " isabel, don't lose your mind." "Don't be scared, nothing bad will happen to me, if God will help me." "Bravo, well done." "That's it." " What?" " I don't know." "Neither do I." "isabel..." " What do you want?" " Why aren't you angry at me?" "Why don't you say that I'm worthless?" "A heartless ruffian." "AII those things you use to say to me?" "Why?" "Because now I have reasons to call you that." "That's a woman's logic." "isabel, if you're my friend, please be wrong." "You have no idea how much that bothers me and really upsets me." "Don't look at me so sadly." "You make me want to cry." "You fool!" " well, you were sort of a friend." " A good friend." "You were so unbearable." "will you miss me?" "As much as possible." "Aren't you going to make a scene?" "Without getting angry?" "Without breaking any china?" "Yes." "Oh, my God, this makes me so sad." "What do you want?" "Be patient." "Deep in your heart you wish me harm, don't you?" "No." "I never cared so much about you as I care now that I reach out my hand" "and say goodbye." " I don't really understand this." "If you think you'II find happiness there, why should I try to separate you from her?" "I'm sure you'II be happy." "She looks like a nice girl, and you're a good man." "I was your big flaw." " Don't say that." " Yes I was." "You'II start going to bed early, you'II always have starched collars in your drawer, and you'II have a charming little woman at home who's a lousy piano player." "It will do you good." "You were thin, you'II get fat and please your family." "In a year, you'II hardly remember me." " That's a lie." " Don't be so kind." "It's nothing." "Thank you." "After that, my friend  since I knew nothing about it, I'd go back home." " Is it yours?" " No." "She's over there." "I'd be very sad." " Goodbye, my dear friend." " Goodbye, isabel." "Do you want me to be honest?" " Go ahead, then..." " Right." "I can't really say why, but for the Iast ten minutes I felt I will never cheat on my wife again." "That will pass, you'II see." "until it does, I'II go upstairs." "Goodbye, isabel." "See you later." "Not later." "I'm touched." "Goodbye." "I'm going to buy some flowers for my wife." "Are you leaving?" "Did you want me to stay?" "silly." "That's true, It can't be." "Goodbye." "Goodbye, Eduardo." "Oh God, why don't you get angry?" " Mariana..." " It's me." "Are you sad?" " No." " Liar." " I'm sad." " Sad?" "Why?" "I feel sorry for her." "I was behind that door listening to everything." "What if she comes back?" "I would rip her eyes out." "My dear loved one." "Mariana!" "Where is she?" "Perhaps she went upstairs." "Mariana!" "She's not answering, maybe she's talking to Laurentina." " This man smells very nice." " He smells like violets." "Mariana?" "Leave her alone, she's so happy..." "A letter for Mr. Saraiva." "Is it decided?" "should we marry them?" " If they love each other..." " That's quite obvious." " And that's all?" " Sorry?" "Yes, my old heart, that came back to awaken me to love again." "Don't you intend to fix the past?" " Do you still want to, adelaide?" " Of course I do!" "Our romance isn't over yet." "I can't read without glasses." "I feel as old as my heart, eighteen." "Yours must be worn out." "I can imagine what it must've lived through, my dandy, in that awful mess of FamaIicão." "You got them all, didn't you, you scoundrel?" "You're wrong, adelaide." "people talk but it's not always true." "You rascal." "I know I'II still be very jealous of you." "adelaide?" "Be still." "Bravo, bravo!" "Very nice." "Madam....." "I'm honoured to ask for your godmother's hand, for my uncle PIácido Mesquita." "Of course, sir It'II be a pleasure." "well done, Mr. Mesquita." "You were right: matrimony is man's great mission on Earth." "Long live the bride and groom." "congratulations, Mrs. adelaide." " Where were you?" " With Mr. Eduardo." "We didn't want to spoil your romance." "should I be angry with you?" "Don't do that, madam." "Come on, PIácido, follow your nephew's example." "Ask for Mariana's hand for him." "You'II give your consent, won't you, godmother?" "Of course, silly." "What do you think, Mr. Saraiva?" "I think that if you got married tonight, I wouldn't be surprised." "Marriage is man's great mission on Earth, as uncle PIácido said." "Even I have become a convert." "I shall celebrate this with my family, next to my dear wife." "I even brought her these flowers which were for MarceIIe." "gentlemen." "Be still." "translation and subtitles Patrícia ViIhena / CRISTBET, Lda."