"Suspects were first observed at approximately 10:30 P.M." "Across the street from the station house." "Robin and Catwoman stood guard as Batman soaped an unoccupied police vehicle." "SUV, Your honor, an egregious gas guzzler." "–And filthy, by the way." "–Continue, officer." "Officer Brody and I approached." "An altercation ensued." "We thought they were hooligans dressed in costume." "As the village people, perhaps." "These suspects then attempted to evade apprehension by discharging one or more eggs in our direction." "The charges are vandalism, resisting arrest, and pandering." "Pandering?" "Our only tricks were in conjunction with our treating, and I do not look like a pimp." "You look like an idiot." "The cat's a known prostitute, your honor. –I object to that!" "All right, masks off now." "I know you." "Alan Shore." "Good to see you, judge." "My colleague Tara Wilson." "Hello." "Would you care to explain to me why two attorneys are out cavorting with a prostitute?" "We needed somebody to be Catwoman." "Someone with a whip." "Mr Shore, while you are a gifted attorney, you bring embarrassment and shame to the legal community." "You're very kind, sir." "Case dismissed." "Boston Legal 1x05 An Eye for an Eye" "." "." "." "." "." "." "." "." "." "ORIGINAL AIR DATE ON ABC: 2004/10/31" "What's this with the Markham settlement?" "He refuses to sign." "He keeps redlining us on language." "We think that he's postponing it until after the new year for tax reasons." "I'll keep pushing him as best I can." "On a personal aside, I'd like to remind everyone to vote." "It's our civic duty." "Whatever our politics, at the end of the day, we're Americans." "We bleed red, white, and blue." "Morgan vs Rayburn." "Still in trial." "The client survived his testimony barely." "Tara and I are pushing a settlement, and on a personal aside," "I'm bored." "–I beg your pardon?" "You people keep assigning me these boring cases." "At my old firm, I got murderers." "I had clients who had touched themselves in public restrooms." "These are people you could root for, not to mention relate to." "Is there some other place you'd rather be, Mr Shore?" "Yes, I want to be on cable." "That's where all the best work is being done." "–Who's doing the Holcomb case?" "–Uh, that's Edwin Poole." "–Aren't you..." "–I just handled the decert motion." "I didn't prep the trial." "Surely, Edwin assigned it to somebody?" "Well, um... actually..." "Denny?" "Are you handling the Holcomb pharmaceuticals trial?" "I am." "Are you prepared to try this case?" "I will be." "You will be." "Are you aware the trial begins tomorrow?" "We have a problem, Lori." "You at least need to backstop Denny here." "I don't... –I can't." "I'm in trial myself today." "In trial on what?" "I, um, was assigned a case a couple of days ago, which I sort of took." "What kind of case?" "Uh, just a... homicide." "What?" "Why are you suddenly taking court appointments?" "I just need kind of a change, that's all." "Now everyone here is dissatisfied?" "What is this?" "The case I did last week... it kind of awakened me a little." "I'm feeling the need to connect with people." "–Criminal people." "–Please don't trivialize this." "Criminal defense is a far cry from criminal prosecution, Lori." "You won't like it." "How can you possibly know that before I even..." "I know you." "So..." "Shall we?" "We shall." "Do you have Morgan's address?" "I do, but what I meant is, shall we continue where we left off last night?" "In front of my building with you peeing in the planter." "I was about to burst." "You should've let me come up." "That plant needed watering." "You should've let me come up, Tara." "It was 4:00 A.M. I let you up, next thing we know, we're in the liquor cabinet." "Two minutes after that, passed out." "Robin sprawled across Batman." "What would they say at the hall of justice?" "Was that what you were afraid of, the sprawling?" "I invited you out to get your mind off Sally." "You've succeeded." "It's back to an old, familiar wanton place." "Alan, we agreed that you and I couldn't work." "What was the reason again?" "I've forgotten." "It would be trouble." "One night out, we lose all control and end up behind bars." "Which was utterly intoxicating, was it not, losing control together?" "What about it, Tara?" "After all this time, maybe we should undress." "We're late." "Thick file." "Of course, it's a thick file." "It's a class action involving thousands of plaintiffs, and it's complicated, Denny." "Thick file." "Look, all we can do is throw ourselves at the mercy of the judge." "If you and I both go to see him and explained Edwin's situation, maybe he'll give us some time." "Thick file." "$70,000." "It's their opening offer." "You seem like a very nice man, Mr Morgan." "You also seem like a hypochondriac." "These headaches are real." "I have no doubt." "You've also complained on several occasions that you were suffering from tanapox virus." "Because I noticed the characteristic papular lesions." "They're very tender." "Approximately 2 centimeters in diameter." "You realize the tanapox virus is endemic to equatorial Africa." "Yes. –Have you enjoyed your many visits to equatorial Africa?" "I've never been there." "Ah." "Then perhaps... you can see the outline of our problem, Mr Morgan." "Look, it's not my fault." "I go to the library, and I read books." "And I try to understand how I might get better, but sometimes, the books, they scare me even more because they describe diseases I didn't even know I had." "Maybe I am a hypochondriac." "What do you take for that?" "Miss Colson, I have never been in a fight before." "Okay, we need to be able to call a witness or two who can speak to your nonviolent character." "Well, I told you, my mother." "Mothers tend to come off as biased." "There's gotta be somebody else." "Friends, coworkers." "There's gotta be somebody." "Well, I live at home, I work at home, I hardly ever go out." "My mother's the only one... but I gotta warn you, she doesn't make the best impression." "What do you mean?" "Well, she's got a glass eye." "And it doesn't fit so good, and when she gets upset... if you put her on the stand, don't get her upset." "I went up to the bar to get a few drinks, and when I turned around, that's when I saw, uh," "Jared and him exchanging words." "And I could tell it wasn't friendly." "By him?" "The defendant." "So I started heading back, and the place was really packed." "So I was kinda blocked." "That's when I saw Jared push him, and then Jared took a swing, and..." "That was it." "What was "it"?" "Tell us what you saw." "The defendant, he just threw a punch right at Jared's throat, and Jared collapsed to the ground." "When I got there, he was hardly breathing, and... he was making, like, a sucking noise." "And then he just stopped breathing." "And I tried to do mouth-to-mouth, and so did another guy who said he knew CPR, but he..." "He just died right there on the floor." "Okay." "Now, Mr Quinlan, this is important." "Describe the punch as best you can." "It was a short, direct punch, and I could.... and I could tell by the way he was holding his hand and how he threw the punch that he knew martial arts." "It was a kill punch." "Objection!" "–Sustained." "Why, in your lay opinion, sir, did you regard it as a kill punch?" "Objection. –Overruled." "He can answer." "By hitting the throat, you can make it collapse, and then the person suffocates." "Which is exactly what happened." "Okay." "You didn't actually see the altercation begin." "You turned around, and they were having words." "–That's right." "–You couldn't hear what was said?" "No. –Mr Quinlan, when the police arrived and questioned you, did you tell them that you recognized my client's punch as a form of martial arts?" "No, I was probably..." "Did you demonstrate to them the fist you just made for the jury?" "I was too shook up." "In fact, you made no mention of martial arts until after it was published in the newspapers." "And when I read it, it clicked." "It all made perfect sense, because that's what I saw." "You just forgot to mention it when the police specifically asked you what you saw." "How many beers had you had that night, sir?" "Three. –How many beers had Jared Grant had?" "Three. –So you admittedly couldn't hear the exchange, you admittedly didn't see the altercation begin, and you'd been drinking." "Certainly no one could anticipate Edwin Poole's illness." "This unanticipated illness occurred weeks ago." "You come to me the day before the trial?" "The simple truth is, this one fell through the cracks." "The plaintiff has witnesses from out of town." "We'd be willing to assume those costs." "Gee, what a swell bunch of guys." "Your honor...–oh, no, no, no, I'm sick of this." "Your firm has employed a strategy of systemic heel-dragging." "It is immoral. –Edwin Poole is the only one who know..." "Whose fault is that?" "You people should be sued for malpractice." "Brian, you and I have a relationship." "I think of you as a friend." "Well, that friendship has gotta take a back seat to principle, I'm sorry." "Well, you know, Brian, given our relationship," "I feel entitled to be honest the way friends are during difficult times." "Can I be honest with you, Brian?" "Please." "Denny..." "You're a bastard, and a greedy one at that." "This is a class action." "You get credit for all the consolidated cases in one fell swoop." "You're looking to make presiding judge." "You need that credit by calendar year's end." "That's why you're desperate to move this thing forward, to pad your docket." "This is about ambition, not morality, you greedy, sniveling little wop." "Motion for continuance denied." "You know what I'm gonna do, Brian, just to show you there are no hard feelings?" "I'm gonna sleep with your wife." "It is our recommendation that you discharge us as counsel." "Ask the judge for time to find new attorneys." "The only alternative is proceeding tomorrow, which I don't think we want to do." "Edwin Poole never even gave us this trial date." "He told us it was continued indefinitely." "Which is why we're suggesting that you discharge us." "He has got to give you time to find new counsel." "–You have to handle this, Sally." "–Me?" "Look, I have this thing about glass eyes." "I once had a teacher with a glass eye, and sometimes when he'd get mad, he'd take it out and whack it on his desk." "It gave me nightmares." "Hi, there." "Hey." "What was that?" "Nothing." "Someone just seems a little overeager to rekindle the flame with Alan Shore." "The offer was firm at $70,000." "Yes, we thought if you'd un-firm it to one and a quarter, we could be done." "Your client wouldn't have to testify tomorrow, which, of course, would free him up to misdiagnose others." "You don't seem to get it, Mr Shore." "We offered $70,000 as nuisance change." "Yes." "We just feel Mr Morgan is a much bigger nuisance than you give him credit for." "And I'm an enormous nuisance." "We should get something for that." "–I feel nauseous." "–You'll be fine." "Knock on it." "You knock on it. –Sally!" "If I'm doing the talking, the least you could do is..." "You, his lawyers?" "Hi. –Hi." "I'm Sally Heep." "This is..." "Lori Colson." "Hello." "Uh, we just wanted to ask you a few questions, Mrs Binder, if we could." "Come on in." "He's a wonderful boy with a gentle heart." "Yes, our problem is, you seem to be the only person to truly know him." "He think I'll make a bad witness on account of the eye." "It's glass, you see." "Look close." "Yes." "Yeah." "The thing is, the prosecution is obviously claiming that Jason's heart is not gentle." "Has he ever been in trouble?" "Has he ever been arrested?" "Has he ever caused any problems for anybody?" "No, he is a nice young man, and it's the way I raised him." "That's exactly what we'll need you to say." "I'm also maybe gonna take you shopping, get your hair done." "–The more presentable..." "–He deserved to die, Jared Grant." "Why do you say that?" "He beat up my Jason." "Well, he didn't exactly beat him up." "–There was an altercation." "–He beat him up." "The man is evil, and he deserved to die!" "–Let's calm down." "–He deserved it, I tell you!" "Dr Rayburn, over the six months that Mr Morgan was in your care, how many visits did he make to your practice?" "38." "Is that a lot?" "Four times as many as any other patient." "We joked he was the office mascot." "You name the condition, Mr Morgan was convinced he had it." "Cold, flu, bronchitis, shingles, adult onset diabetes." "I never complained of adult onset diabetes." "That's characterized by excessive thirst." "Does it seem to you like I've been drinking a lot today?" "I'm sure you're fine, Bill." "Mr Morgan contends your neglect drove him to this state." "The truth is, I bent over backwards to accommodate him." "He always needed to be seen immediately, and busy as my practice is," "I always made the time." "I applaud you, sir, for your tireless commitment to my client." "What a guy!" "Objection. –Sustained." "So these 38 visits, on the house?" "I'm sorry?" "They were free visits?" "No." "Oh!" "So you charged him." "That makes sense." "So with all his complaining, his incapacitation, that pinched look on his face, there's nothing wrong with him." "Nothing clinically, no." "It's in his head." "Traditional home for the migraine, is it not?" "It's psychosomatic." "He's a classic hypochondriac." "I see." "Well, there's a diagnosis." "Tell me, what treatment did you prescribe for my client's classic hypochondria?" "I'm a general practitioner, not a psychiatrist." "So you referred him out to... whom?" "No one in particular." "I did tell him he needed help." "I believe I even gave him a list of practitioners." "So he kept coming to you, you kept taking his money, you did not treat him, and you referred him to... no one in particular." "I'm a G.P." "I told him to seek mental treatment." "I advised it." "I can't force it." "Once again, he kept coming, you kept taking the money, and you referred him to... no one in particular." "So you now want to fire your lawyers?" "Yes, your honor." "We had no idea trial was about to start." "That's how incompetent these people are." "And I suppose you had no idea your company was bilking senior citizens?" "Certainly your honor intends to keep an open mind with regard to the..." "Here's the deal." "I give you one day to find new counsel, 24 hours." "After that, I'm fining you $250,000 a day for any further delay." "It almost seemed personal." "Have you done anything to upset this guy?" "Not that I can think of." "Well, look, aside from preparation concerns, we got a bigger problem." "This judge, he's biased." "This is what I propose we do." "File an interlocutory appeal and ask... –At $250,000 a day." "While we're filing that appeal, we'll go forward." "Should we win, we can suspend the trial." "Should we lose, we won't incur the fine." "But are you people ready to try this case?" "I can try it." "Denny Crane." "There were some settlement discussions that broke down." "If Denny can open big, that might bring them back to the table, which may be the best way to go at this point." "It was four years ago at a park in Brighton." "You met the defendant." "Well, I didn't exactly meet him." "Well, what then?" "I beat the crap out of him." "Excuse me." "I was a different person then." "Okay, Mr Stone, we need to be very specific about what happened back then." "Well, he tried to get into a game of pickup hoops." "Me and another guy in the game we started dissing him a little." "He said something back, and we beat him up pretty good." "I'm not proud of it." "And you're sure it was Jason Binder." "Yeah, when I saw his picture on the news, I remembered his face." "It was definitely him." "And what about the other guy who beat him up?" "Jared Grant, the guy he killed." "You lied to me." "Not only were you in a fight before... it doesn't prove anything." "Now they have a motive, Jason." "The victim beats you up four years ago, you take up Taekwondo, you just so happen to encounter him, at which point you kill him?" "It wasn't like that." "That's why your mom said he deserved to die, because..." "It wasn't like that." "What am I supposed to argue now?" "Let's have it, Jason." "Did you go to that bar to get revenge?" "I went there to stand up to him." "You have no idea how haunted I was by..." "I didn't even put up my hands four years ago." "It wasn't getting beat up that stuck with me." "It was that I didn't even..." "I just let myself get beat up." "So you took up martial arts." "And I went there to stand up to him." "I didn't plan to fight." "I certainly didn't go there to kill him." "Then when he swung at me, I just..." "I swung back." "I never meant to kill him." "Who are we overbilling?" "medicare or senior citizens?" "Both, but medicare isn't suing us." ""Us." Meaning the drug company." "Correct. –But if the hospitals are doing the overcharging, why are the seniors suing the drug company?" "Denny, we've been over this before." "The drug company, our client, has the sweetheart deals with the hospitals." "We give them rebates so they disguise the real cost of the drugs." "They then bill medicare for the higher, allegedly inflated costs." "Really." "What's our defense to that?" "$75,000." "You've upped your offer by $5,000." "We feel it's generous, particularly when your client's injuries aren't real." "–They're real." "–All right, Bill." "You know, Mr Morgan, I don't typically counsel opposing parties, but I might advise a legal malpractice claim against the attorney who filled your head with million-dollar windfalls." "You seem to have a little something wedged between numbers four and five." "Hmm..." "I guess it's just part of your mouth." "One last proposal that's entirely possible..." "I'm kidding, by the way, depending upon your reaction," "$300,000, sealed." "We kick back $50,000 to you under the table." "Mr Shore, I guarantee you, I am not that kind of attorney." "Really." "Gosh, I am." "I should report you directly to the bar, if not the district attorney." "Well, if that's how you feel, then I was kidding." "I'm going to the judge now." "Excellent." "New trial." "That'll certainly cost your client much more than $75,000." "Your offer is rejected." "Suppose he does, go to the judge." "Oh, please, he doesn't want a mistrial." "He thinks he's won." "Plus, he can't prove I wasn't kidding." "I'm known to be funny." "This is a child who wouldn't slap a mosquito." "He would shoo it away." "He couldn't bring himself to harm a fly or any animal, certainly not a human being." "Four years harboring a grudge doesn't suggest a rage to you?" "He was bullied by many people, Mr Martin, not just Jared Grant." "–But he killed Jared Grant." "He got into a fight, which had a tragic ending." "He never intended to kill, nor could he." "Well, he learns a lethal martial arts maneuver that..." "He learned to defend himself." "Look at the size of him, for god's sake." "What was he to do, defend people off with a sharp wit?" "Mrs Binder, you love your son very much, don't you?" "Of course I do." "In fact, he's your only child." "He's all you have, isn't he?" "Yes. –He lives with you, or did before his arrest." "There's something wrong with that?" "I bet you would do or say anything to keep him from going to prison." "I'm up here telling the truth." "No, you're telling lies to spare a loved one a life sentence." "No, you're the one at's telling lies." "–You're the liar here." "–Your son's a killer!" "–No, he is not!" "–Your son is a killer." "No, he is not!" "What does a rubber glove have to do with this?" "Denny, the alleged fraud goes beyond just prescription drugs." "It goes to medical supplies as well." "I see a rubber glove," "I'm heading in the other direction, I'll tell you that." "Denny, do you understand what this case is about?" "I do, Paul." "Can you succinctly tell us?" "The plaintiff thinks he's getting bilked for drugs and supplies." "His evidence is, we charged hospitals and clinics less for those very drugs and supplies." "Our argument is, the mere offering of a discount to a consumer does not constitute the overbilling to another." "In fact, since hospitals and clinics with ERs regularly treat those who cannot pay," "An argument could be made that we are extending these discounts to those most in need." "We're saving lives, damn it, and I will not apologize for my client's billing practices." "I salute them." "I invite you to salute them." "Okay." "Let's turn to the vertical integration between our clients and the hospitals." "What the hell is that?" "Earl grey, huh?" "That would keep me up till Thursday." "Hopefully a few hours, at least." "You and Alan pulling a late one?" "Might be." "We're closing tomorrow." "What are you doing tonight?" "Preparing." "Right." "You know, the whole Sally and Alan thing, she's still pretty raw." "Meaning?" "–Oh, just that if you had any intentions of..." "Eating her?" ""Raw" would certainly be problematic." "All that kicking and screaming." "Rare often works for me." "Seared." "I'm sorry, did you mean something else?" "I'm just looking out for a friend." "I see." "Well, given that it was Sally's decision to end our relationship, perhaps you'd consider looking out for me." "You seem all right." "Just to clarify, if Tara did have any intention of whatever, euphemism you were in search of, it would, in fact, be none of your business." "To put your mind at rest, Tara appears not to have intentions." "I do." "In fact, just yesterday," "I was suggesting to her that we engage in a sexual act in her office, but her impenetrable sense of decorum unfortunately prevented us from... engaging." "That was unnecessary." "It's a scam." "They charge the hospital "X" amount of dollars for the drug." "The hospital then bills medicare, a portion of which the senior citizens are paying." "The evidence will show that the defendant, Holcomb pharmaceuticals systematically defrauded and bilked senior citizens out of billions and billions of dollars." "The elderly are discriminated against every single day in this country." "They get their driver's licenses yanked, they are targeted by abusive telemarketers." "The prejudice is pervasive." "But you know what?" "They still do get one thing." "their day in court." "Need I point out that it's your turn to talk?" "I hate old people." "I always have." "They're babies." "Hell, there's a reason half of them are in diapers." "The elderly... make up a large percentage of the wealth in this country." "They run most of the fortune 500 companies." "They're running the war, for god's sakes." "And most of them are viable, healthy people." "What do they do?" "Retire at age 65 and start draining our resources." "We got enormous poverty in this country." "We can't educate our kids partly because these strong-bodied, strong-minded senior citizen farts are living off of social security." "Why shouldn't we overcharge them?" "Mr Crane, I'm not following your argument here." "That's because you're a moron." "Judges, old people, they all gotta go." "Mr Crane!" "–Tell you what... slap my client with a million-dollar verdict." "We'll pass on the costs to the consumer, the plaintiffs will think they've won, and we won't be out a dime." "Members of the jury, regretfully, I must declare this proceeding a mistrial." "Aw, gee, I'm sorry to hear that." "That'll cause a big delay, won't it?" "Next thing you know, he'll recuse himself because I called him a bad word." "You are in contempt." "Bailiff, take Mr Crane into custody." "Put me in a cell with Martha, will you?" "I gotta have sex with that woman." "Four years of premeditation, he trained in deadly force, then he sought out Jared Grant, provoked a fight, and inflicted a deadly blow to his trachea." "Maybe he even did start the fight." "We can't know that." "There's no proof of that." "But even if we're to assume it, we simply cannot make the leap to intent to kill." "Why else would he go there?" "Why else would he punch him in the throat?" "Why would he do it in front of a room full of people?" "Why not just run him down with a car if his intent was to kill?" "Jason Binder went there, as he told you, to stand up for himself." "Nothing more." "It's bad enough that patients are running to the courts suing their doctors for all their ills, now we have one suing for his imagined ills." "This case represents the height in frivolous litigation." "What's next?" "Seeking damages for a bad dream?" "I hope not." ""Frivolous", is that what he said?" ""Frivolous"?" "Astonishing." "This man, who suffers day in and day out, migraines so excruciating he cannot work, can't endure 10 minutes at his computer, a trained software engineer." "And here he is subjecting himself to depositions, to examinations, to the laborious mind-numbing blather of attorneys, all for what?" "Frivolity?" "For six months, Bill Morgan reached out to his doctor week after week, each time invoiced for thousands and thousands of dollars in sum." "And then each time dismissed, patted on the head, and sent on his way." "Had Mr Morgan actually received the right medical care or even been directed to a doctor who could specifically give him that care, psychiatric or otherwise, his current state would most likely have been alleviated." "But the defendant couldn't be bothered to care." "As Dr Rayburn told you himself, he treated Bill Morgan like a mascot." "Opposing counsel regards him as a nuisance." "He's a human being." "He's a human being." "We teach our children that everyone is entitled to respect and dignity." "How pathetic it is when adults can't abide such a basic lesson in humanity." "How unconscionable." "The defendant will please rise." "Madam Foreperson, the jury has reached a unanimous verdict?" "We have, your honor." "What say you?" "In the case of the commonwealth vs Jason Binder, on the charge of murder in the first degree, we find the defendant Jason Binder not guilty." "On the charge of murder in the second degree, we find the defendant Jason Binder not guilty." "The jury is dismissed with our thanks." "The defendant is free to go." "We're adjourned." "Thank you so much." "Thank you." "I'm told congratulations are in order." "You too." "Denny bought you some time, I hear." "My father was a criminal defense attorney." "He went into it to champion civil rights, to defend the oppressed, to connect with people." "But all I ever saw at the supper table was a man struggling to deal with the idea that he helped put murderers back on the street." "Heading home?" "Jail." "Incarcerated friend." "You run with a dangerous crowd." "I try." "As do I." "I don't think that's quite true." "You don't know me, Alan Shore, not as well as you think. –No?" "No, certainly not as well as I know you." "How well is that?" "I know that there are three Alan Shores... the good, the bad, and the naughty." "The good Alan, the man that I saw today in court, is honorable and decent." "But you can't bear the burden of being that man." "Thus, the bad Alan who lays to waste everything in his life that seems right." "I do have intentions." "My intentions are to get beyond the bad, which I've tried to do again and again by appealing to the good." "But it appears to me that perhaps" "I should be appealing to the naughty." "I'm not certain that Tara Wilson I know is up to the task." "Again, you don't know me, Alan." "File for you." "–Your ball was set at $6 million." "–Fine." "I brought you a hamburger." "The guards here are extremely hospitable." "I just got a jury verdict for $320,000." "Lori got a not guilty in her murder case." "You cleverly orchestrated a mistrial, and a woman I'm infatuated with delivered to me her panties in a manila folder." "I think we're obliged to have a drink." "Cheers." "I wasn't clever." "I forgot." "I beg your pardon?" "I stood up, armed with all the facts of our client's billing practices, and..." "I went blank in front of the jury." "I couldn't remember a damn thing." "Well, that can happen sometimes." "You once said you suspected I had..." "Alzheimer's." "How does a person know?" "Well... there's no exact diagnostic." "They can do certain tests." "Denny... you may have gone up on an opening, but to recover like that and go for the mistrial, that's evidence of a man thinking quickly on his feet." "I wanna take the test." "." "." "."