"[orchestral music]" "[music continues]" "[music continues]" "What about that?" "[music continues]" "Lie!" "It's a lie!" "It must be true." "It's in the paper." " I gave a diamond bracelet?" " To a girl." "It's a lie." "A night club entertainer who calls you popsy-wopsy." "It's a lie." "[instrumental music]" "Ah, and that guy calls himself a pal of mine." "You should be careful who you go around with." "Well, I guess so." "[instrumental music] [music continues]" "God bless him." "[orchestral music]" "[music continues] [indistinct chatter]" " Hi, Maloney." " Hi, kid." "Boy, you're getting famous." "Look, the great Poster's got in this column this morning." "Such fame." "Such fame." "Thank you." "Two beer." "One telephone." " What's it say?" " Nothing." "In an extremely large tone of voice." ""Ed Maloney, who says he is the star reporter"" ""for The Examiner and who is supposed to be prying"" ""into the gentle art of political graft hereabouts."" ""So far hasn't even found the set of loaded dice"" ""in his own pocket."" "I trimmed Poster in a crap game." "That's his cheapskate answer." " I'd like to drown that guy." " Hey, no fooling." "The line forms on the left." "In a lake of carbolic acid." "Immediately 4-6-1-6-5." "Some day that guy's foot's gonna slip and I hope I'm there with a boot." "It's a few men like him that make people hold their noses and run for cover when a reporter comes." "You're right." "He's a disgrace to our noble profession." "He's a bad name to us, honest, descent.." "Hello, Charlie." "Yeah, I'm still camping right on the door step on that interview." "Yeah, sure I am." "Don't be so suspicious." "Why, I'm..." "I'm calling from a filling station." "[chuckles]" "Good evening." "The Morning Gazette." "What can I help it if the janitor steals your paper." "Everybody likes to read The Gazette." "Well, I'll connect you with the circulation department." "Good evening." "The Morning Gazette." "What?" "Oh, I'll connect you with the perfect baby editor." "Yes, of course you can enter triplets if you have them." "Good evening." "The Morning Gazette." "William Poster?" "Oh, just a moment." "Oh, thank you." "[telephone ringing]" "Mr. Poster's office." "Will Mr. Poster like to buy a good joke?" "Mr. Poster already has a good joke." "He's used it for years and years that still wows him." "Sorry." "[telephone ringing]" "Hello." "Oh, just a minute, Mr. O'Sullivan." "It's the boss." "Will you give him a couple of golden minutes of your time?" "Uh-uh-uh, take it easy now, cutie." " That'll be enough." " 'It's the boss.'" "Tell him I'm in the middle of a thought." "Come on, cutie, the lemon juice, the lemon juice." "Oh-oh-oh, yes, sir." "Whatever you do, don't forget two cups of sugar." "Two cups of sugar." "You're right." " Shit, mama." " Yes, you found my brow." "He's still thinking, Mr. O'Sullivan." "I'm sorry." "Say, the old man's practically chewing the mouthpiece, Mr. Poster." "And him with his indigestion." "Let him wait, honey." "He only owns the paper." "Now, don't waste any, cutie." "Ah, I recommend another dash of Italian Vermouth." "I think you're right." "Here we are." "Shake it up well, and hoist it in the cooler." "Yes, sir." "[chuckles] Mama, what a cocktail!" "Ha-ha, yeah they're, yeah they're, yeah they're." "Hey, clean up these boxes, will you?" " Yes, sir." " Poster." "Alley-oop." "Give, sweetheart." "Look here, you're getting the paper into a nasty mess again." "G. K. Vanderhoff is seeing his lawyer about some cock and bull story you ran." "He threatens to serve us for million dollars." "A million dollars?" "Swell." "Why don't you send it to him in postage stamps." "Sure, I am crazy." "Insanity runs in the family." "It's easy for you to ice crack, Poster." "What am I supposed to do?" "Why don't you run it on the front page?" "And watch the these birds who humorously call themselves columnists turned pea green with envy." "Why they blow up the minute someone sues them for a quarter." "Huh, what?" "Run an apology?" "Why, you?" "Okay, I will." "Bee, take this down for the column." "G. K. Vanderhoff claimed his good name is worth one million bucks." "Count them, one million." "I know a lot of very broke brokers of Wailing Wall Street who would be glad to sell their house for a tenth of that." "And throw in their houses and yachts." "That's should satisfy O'Sullivan." "You know, Mr. Poster, a couple of guys going around town calling you O'Sullivan's heel." "Remind me to step on you someday." "Yeah." "You gotta tone down that column of yours." " That's my last word." " It is?" "Alright, then get this." "If you don't like it, have my resignation." "I'm a newspaper man." "The only thing that I know is to print the news." "Whether it's on Vanderhoff or my grandmother or you." "And by the way, sweetheart, what have you been doing lately that you shouldn't?" "I need a lead for the Mars column." "[grumbling] [chuckles]" "Alley-oop." "And now I ask myself." "Do people buy this newspaper to read his stupid editorials?" "And what do you answer yourself?" "[telephone ringing]" "Hello." "Just a minute." "Alley-oop." "Well, what's your complaint?" "This isn't a beef, dear." "It's Peggy." "Honey, angel, darling sweetheart, light of my life, and star of my night." " What's on your mind?" " Get this." "Mrs. Calhoun found two pink garters in Senator Calhoun's pocket last night." "Bee, get this." "Nelly Calhoun found two pink garters in her hubby's pockets last night." "And is his face red?" "Good, keep that in." "Go ahead." "Ah-ha." "And hubby is still trying to convince her that they're sleeve holders." "Is that a panic?" "Do you love me?" "Oh, he's another one." "Harder." "This morning..." "Is there only one line in the district attorney's office?" "Well, what is this?" "A serial story?" " Just a minute." " Ah?" "I can't hear you, Peggy." "Oh, dear, why don't you save the whispering until it counts?" "Bee." "Take this up and open it." "It might be a bomb." "If it is, I'll write you a nice epitaph." "Here lies Bee." "She was a good girl." "But she went to pieces." "Come on, Peggy, come on." "It-it is noisy here." "Get it?" "New neighbors just moved in." "What?" "Oh, oh, I get you okay." "I'll see you at dinner." "Of course, I won't be late." "And hey don't forget to wear your shoes it's gonna be formal." "Who sent that?" "'Oh, someone who had your interest at heart.'" ""See no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil."" "If I followed that advice I'd starve to death." "They're yours." "I'm going out for a minute." "I maybe a week, I maybe an hour." "I don't know." "Who cares." "And don't tease the monkeys." "Screwier and screwier." "Good evening, The Morning Gazette." "You say you let him kiss you the first night you met him?" "Did you do wrong?" "Just a minute, I'll connect you with the lovers problem department, oh, you're welcome." "Hmm, did she do wrong?" "Doesn't she remember." "[orchestral music]" "[indistinct]" " 'Hello, Dan.' - 'How are you, Mr. Poster.' [indistinct singing]" "[singing continues]" "[singing continues]" "Hello, Madge." "How are you honey?" " Are you happy?" " Gosh no." " I'm plain low down low." " What's the matter sugar?" "Oh, it's that chiseling O'Connor dame over there." "No ethics." " Meow." " What?" "No, ethics?" "Nope." "Not an ethic in her whole body." "Here I was up till two days ago, right in the whelm." "Old man Wadmeyer was simply gaga about me." " Till she butted in." " Not Jimmy Wadmeyer?" "You mean the big forsaken Brazil man." " Uh-huh." " Why shouldn't he be honey." "You've got everything." "And, if, but, seldom thereafter and thereby." "Thanks, William." "You see his alibi was that we had to give each other up because we're getting into all the papers." "All papers?" "I had an exclusive in yesterday's column." " You did?" " Certainly." "Why you cheap squealer." "Wait a minute, I did it for you." "You did it for me alright, you big bum." "You only cost me a Park Avenue penthouse and a Rolls-Royce." "Now listen." "What's the difference?" "You can buy 'em nowadays for a dime." "What you girls oughta go after are big things, like the Eiffel and Empire State building." " Oh, the nerve." " Hey, listen." "Come here." "What do you want?" "Nothing, nothing I thought I knew you." "Scram, scram." " Well." " Well?" "Oh, now honey angel, honest I love you." "Now let me see, I thought I had a dinner date with somebody but no couldn't have been you because you didn't show up." "But listen darling, I was going to tell you." "I couldn't make it." "Oh, why don't you be reasonable." "I'm trying to explain if you could only.." "Oh, don't frown, honey it makes wrinkles." "Why shouldn't I be sour you're always skipping your meal." "Oh, so I'm a meal skipper." "Am I?" "Alright, sue me." "'Why don't you take care of yourself.'" "'You never eat.' 'And you don't sleep either.'" " 'You think too darn much.'" " You bite your nails." "You don't brush your teeth and you don't keep your ears clean." "I do the best I can, but I..." "I don't know what." "Come here darling." "Mmm, well.." " Young huh?" " Oh, Billy you're so bad." "How do you expect anybody to be good around a beautiful cookie like you." " More." " Not now darling." "What I need is some real hot news." "I've got something that sizzling." " You know, Mildred Huntington?" " Sure." "She's the daughter of the American pickle company." "She's merging with Alex Whitaker." "The son of the Malcolm Edith milk corporation." "She's broken her engagement sailing secretly for Europe at midnight, evidently pickles and milk don't mix." " What boat?" " Aquitania." "Aquitania." "My ace in the hole, sweetheart." "Honey that's worth looking into." "I'll meet you at 12 o'clock and bring supper with you." " And get yourself some flowers." " With what?" "Isn't my credit good, don't I earn 25 bucks?" "I hope that dame is homely." "[horn blaring]" "Listen, what is the number of Mildred Huntington suite?" "Just a moment, sir." "Haste, haste." "Like in hurry, hurry, hurry." "There's no Mildred Huntington on the..." " Never mind, I'll find her." " I'm very, very sorry." "[upbeat music]" "[music continues]" " My darling." " My beautiful bride." "(William) 'My mistake.' [whistling]" " But I saw you do it." " I didn't." " I say you did." " I say I didn't." "(William) 'I'll say she did.' [continues whistling]" "[indistinct chattering]" "[music continues] [chattering continues]" "Now, quite please!" "It's no use going on like this." "I'm not going to marry Alex." "And I am going to Europe." "[indistinct chattering]" "Stop." "Stop." " Now... one at a time." " But it's ridiculous." "It's just isn't being done." "You're wrong aunty, it is being done." "And I'm doing it." "But what will the dear Bishop say." "He's postponed his vacation to marry you." "Think of the notoriety." " People are bound to gossip." " I'd love it." "I'd far rather be gossiped about than bored." " Oh, my." " And I'm bored stiff." "Aunty, I'm tired of living in a social refrigerator." "I'm tired of playing around with a lot of stuffed shirts to think they're important just because their people came over." " You ought to be shaken." " Don't try it, Alex." "You might spoil a manicure." "Luggage." " Put it in the other room." " Thank you." "Mildred, once and for all I absolutely forbid you to go." "Why shouldn't she go to Europe?" "I'd hire her to go back and forth on boats of mine." "Yes, ma'am." "Ms. Huntington's presence pack steam ship lines." "Depression ends." "Aren't you forgetting yourself young man?" " Now, now, Aunt Vicky." " Vicky." "The very best of people forget themselves." "I knew a charming dignified middle aged lady who forgot herself in Paris once." "And her blood wasn't merely blue." "It was ultra marine." " Oh, the very idea of it." " Aunty, and you never told me." " Ring for the steward." " I'll throw him out myself." "Alex, don't you dare get manly." "Who is this person?" " None of you would know." " Do you?" "Who hasn't heard of William Poster, the tattler." "The man who knows scandal about people even they've forgotten." "Let's get out of here." " Come along, we'll have..." " Goodbye, Mildred." " Goodbye Darling." " Come Alexander." " Come along." " Bye, Aunt Vicky." " Good bye." " Goodbye Alexander." "Thanks mister for the best laugh I've had in years." " Then you knew me." " Of course." "Say I like you." " You like me?" " Uh-huh." " Let's like each other." "Hm." " Why not." "[horn blaring]" "There's chopping up in the couple of seconds, sir." " You know I really like you." " You'll have to hurry, sir." "A Poster never hurries." "You know, I'm really sorry you're not making this trip." "Lady if you're making this trip I'm making this trip." " Oh." " Whither thou goest, I goest." "Thy boat shall me my boat." "And thy liquor hm, that shall be my liquor too." "[upbeat music]" "Thank you." "Why do you want to go to Europe?" "Excitement." "I wanna catch up on the thrills." "You're leaving them all behind." "Why don't you see America first?" "Oh, I've been bored in all 48 states." "The rock bound coast of Maine." "To the sunny shores of California." "Lady you haven't seen America." "Not my America." "N-E-W-Y-O-R-K, America." "I wish I could show it to you." "From the white rocked bound coast of the Battery." "The ginger ale bound shores of the Bronx." "What you need is a personally conducted tour through the gutters of the city." "Lot of interesting people living in the gutters." " You make it sound marvelous." " I can make it be marvelous." "[orchestral music]" "How far out are we?" "Just four bottles." "Would you be my personal guide?" "Very personal." "[intense music]" "Pilot's ready to leave, sir." " On which side?" " On the port side, sir." "Very well." "Is it true Ms. Huntington, that you're going to Europe?" " No." " No." "Well, then let's go home with the pilot." "Marvelous." "Oh." "But the pilot boat stays out for days." "No, the pilot boat goes home for William Poster." "Come on then, let's go." "Quickly, get the bag." " Go on." " Right away." "Coming." " Thank you very much." " Come, porter." " Okay baby." " Come on porter, hurry up." "[phone ringing]" "Hello, hello." "Hello, Joe." "What's hot." "I thought you'd like to know that Angelo Spinello is paying Tony Mugatti a visit after closing time tonight." "Oh, yes the high voltage politician." "Well, thanks Joe, I was just gonna drop by any way." "Okay, okay, I'll send you your check just the same." "[phone ringing]" "Hello, hello." "Mr. Poster, Peggy Bannon has been trying to get in touch with you for two hours." "Tell her to keep her what on?" "Oh, Mr. Poster." "Pretty good stuff aye, Mr. Ramalone?" "The stuff okay but your pronunciation is terrible." "My name's Maloney." "E-E, not Malone." "Oh, sure, sure." "Maloney." "I won't forget again Mr. Ramalone." "'Get it right, my name is Maloney'" "'Maloney, Maloney, Maloney.'" "Baloney, baloney, baloney, baloney." " 'Hi, Mr. Poster.'" " Hello, Tony." "I knew and I smelled it, the end of a perfect day." "You know Tony, you should have this place fumigated." "Cockroaches will crawl through cracks of that door every time." "Ain't it the truth." " Hi, Joe." " Hello, Mr. Poster." "Hello you gorgeous, wonderful little baby you." "Willy is late as usual." "And he offers his humble apologies." "And as usual he begs forgiveness from the sweetest girl in the world." "Without waiting for her answer he accepts her apology." "As usual." "Honey, business detained me." "My business is your business." "Let's consider ourselves partners, huh." "Don't get yourself out of breath explaining, dear." "I understand she was beautiful." "She wasn't bad." "How long has Maloney been hanging around?" " Since twelve." " I can't relax with him around." " Let's get rid of him." " Oh, Bill, why..." "Listen, honey I got a hot tip that something might pop here tonight, I don't want that guy in on the story." "Now listen, dear." "Tony, a cup of hemlock for old man Socrates." "If you only had some or even some strychnine." "Hemlock?" "Just out." "I got something just as good." "Alright, haul her in." "Throw in a coffin and charge it to the examiner." " Sure, anything you want." " Can you take dictations." " Sure the best service in town." " Alright, take this down." "All ready Tony?" ""Last night a cheap exhibitionist spread himself on what mid town speak easy floor."" "Just a minute, Tony." "Cross that out and take this." ""What park rogue drunketh flipped the chip" ""from who's wrong shoulder and woke up and found himself a cigar store Indian."" "Suppose I'd be riding step as a wooden Indian at that." "They disappeared long with the sense of decency." "Mention of which so burns you up." "Oh, sweetness and light." "Listen, Revered Maloney." "I'm a mirror reflecting the spirit of the times." " A violin playing..." " A ten horn." "That's the tune that people dance to, these cock eyed days in this cock eyed town of ours, but you wouldn't like that." " No." " Hm." "My music grates on your tender sensibilities." "Even the hardest of us get tired of the sound of sewers, it's so monotonous." "Oh, nuts, Poster." "Who couldn't draw attention to himself by driving a garbage wagon through fire slides and bedrooms." "With an air of, "what a bright boy am I."" "It's gotten me somewhere hasn't it?" "Sure." "Just where you'd get a thousand other reporters if they'd stoop to your level, in the stinking gutters." "You mean in the velvet, Maloney." "It's gotten me in the neighborhood of a grand a week." "That's a might nice neighborhood if any one should drive up and ask you." " What do you take home?" " A 100 and a half." "And myself respect." "[phone ringing]" "Hello." "Mr. Maloney." "Just a minute." "Mr. Malone, for you." "Thanks." "Maloney, speaking." "Oh, hello, dear." "Wait, I'll come right home." "Yes dear." "I saw her at.." "Yes dear." "Yes dear." "I wonder how my wife ever found out I was here." "Tony, my heredity is okay but I'll be hanged if I can stand this low environment." "[door opens and closes]" "Tony, fix me a plate of cheese and crackers will you." "That's getting rid of a one syllable expert." "Yeah, with a little help from mama." " Here's to mama." " Here's to papa." " Goodnight, Joe." " Goodnight, Mr. Mugatti." "There's my story now." "I got Maloney out just in time." "Honey, do I make breaks for myself or not." "I just dropped in to say goodbye to you, Tony." "I hear your leaving town." "Someone have told you wrong." "Tony leaves town for nobody." "No, not even for me." "Nobody." "[speaking foreign language]" "[speaking foreign language]" "And I didn't bring my interpreter." " Is something wrong?" " No, no, honey." "They're just calling themselves pet names that's all." "[speaking foreign language]" " What was that?" " Nothing, honey." "The club just dropped another member that's all." "Goodnight Angelo, my friend I see you soon, huh." "Ah, Mr. Poster." "I'll have the cheese and cracker right away." "Okay, Tony." "Say how about pouring me a little night cap?" "Oh, sure, you sit down I'll bring it right..." " Alright, no hurry." " No, no, you sit right down." " I'll bring her right away." " What's the matter Tony." " Having little trouble?" " No, no, trouble." "Just a friend of mine, he's a little sick he lie down." " Friend of yours, huh?" " Yes." "Little sick." "Let's call a doctor." "No, big husky man like him he don't need a doctor." " Well, you know best Tony." " Just a minute Mr. Poster." "Let me tell you a story." " You like hear nice story, huh?" " Sure if I can print it." "Listen then you see." "Mr. Poster, they do very funny thing where I come from." "You're a man, he is talk too much... they cut out the tongue." "If he see too much... they burn out the eye." "If he hear too much... they cut off the ear." "That's a quaint little custom." " Take it easy." " So I was gonna tell you." "The fellow I knew just happened to be some place where is trouble and he listen this trouble." "He look this trouble, he talk this trouble." "Talks are very bad because they cut off the ear." "And when the beautiful music she play, he no hear." "And they punch out the eyes." "And it's a beautiful day and the sun she shine and all the trees so fresh and green." "And a pretty girl she passed by he no see." "And they slice out the tongue and when there's a big dish of spaghetti with nice mushroom and cheese." "And a nice vino, he not taste." "Say Tony, that is a funny story." "Don't you know any sad ones." "Yes." "I know a sadder one that might happen." "Oh, come on snap out of it Tony." "I'm your pal." "Palsy walsy, you know that." "Sure, have something on Tony, huh." " Make mine double." " Anything new today Tony?" "No, no." "Everything just right." "People come in have a good time." "Sure, Tony take care everybody." "Your my friend." "You come back soon, eh." "Come back two, three time everyday three, four time every night." " Sure." "Tony want to see you." " Thanks, Tony." "Well, I'll be seeing you around, huh." "Come on, honey." "You didn't know it was my birthday." "Sunday I told you I had a birthday too." "And Monday I told you that 17 was my lucky number because I was born on the 17." "And Tuesday I took you by that bakery window and showed you that beautiful birthday cake." "Oh, Jimmy can't you take a hint." "Oh, just a minute, Jimmy, hold on." "Morning Gazette, Oh, city desk." "Oh, just a minute Mr. Poster." "Get the lid out of where?" "Oh, Mr. Poster." "[phone ringing]" "Hello." "Who?" "Oh, hello, Bill." "Hello, hello, see I can't understand a word you're saying." " Please Bill, don't do it." " Layoff, I've got work to do." "They'll get you, you heard what Tony said." "See what this means?" "Exclusive murder story printed in the chartered column for the first time." "Why don't you call the police." "And let every reporter get in on the story?" "You'll print anything to get in the limelight?" "Keep your pretty nose out of my business." "It's not your business to print murder stories." "I love you, I don't want anything to happen." "Oh, bunk, love is for story books, murder stories are for newspapers, take your hand of that phone darling." "Hello, Henry." "Listen I've got a new lead for my column." "I know you're on a dead line, listen this is red hot." "Angelo Spinello just got bumped off." " Yeah." " You got it all bottled up?" "I'll smear it all over the front page." "Yes and my column goes with it, It's never been done before" "I want it done now." "Alright, Bill, no time for argument." "Hey, Mcgetty, grab this yarn." "You're all set Mac." "Here it goes." "On the New York front, your home town war correspondent witnesses a speak easy murder that was every reported by a Broadway scribbler." " Please, Bill, don't." " Pipe down." "No, not you Mac, listen, paragraph, if the homicide squad with its face red will go to Tony Mugatti's speak easy at" "45th street near sixth avenue." "They'll find the blood still red on the cheese knife." "Tony isn't too sanitary." "The man on the other end of the knife was Angelo Spinello." "High voltage politician." "Yeah that's right." "[clicking]" "Boy." "[clicking continues]" "Rush that up to the composing room they're waiting for it." "Have you got it Mac." "Great okay." "Wait until Maloney and the rest of the journalist see that." "Now, you've done it." "Bill, listen to me just this once." "Please let's get out of town something terrible might happen." "If it does honey, I'll print it." "I've got an idea." "Let's go back to Tony's." "Oh, you're crazy." "Might buy us drinks for keeping our mouth shut." "Can't you think of anything but wisecracks." "I'm afraid to get out of this booth." "Great, we'll spend the night here." "Give us a kiss sweetheart." " Smile and show your dimples." " Oh, don't talk to me." "Alright." "Hello operator..." "I've got something to say and I might as well tell it to you." "You know my sweetheart, Peggy, she's marvelous." "She's like the sound of waves on a lonely beach on a starry night." "How do I know what beach?" "Any beach." "She's like the whisper of winds rustling through fragrant woods." "Now ain't that something." "And operator, when I say that I say it right from the heart." "William Poster's heart." "The biggest and best heart in all Manhattan." "There's a crazy man on this line." "Oh, Bill, I love you so much." "You crazy clown." "Honey that's that Poster fever, you've got it bad." "Worst than any girl ever had it before." "Now what?" "No, I don't want a number." "I just wanted to tell you that we're not to be disturbed." "Ah-h-h, what have we here." "A lonesome little bulb." "Well, well, well." "I think I'll take it back to Broadway, honey." "Back to Broadway where it belonged." "Sweetheart." "'Your wonderful.'" "[indistinct chattering]" "(male #1) 'A nice big smile." "That's fine.'" "'Okay, come on folks lets go.'" " Hello Maloney." " Hello Frank." "Didn't anybody but Poster get this." "No, I wouldn't be amazed if that trombone struck Spinello himself just to get on the front page." "Can you imagine that happened under my nose." "Practically under my nose right behind my back." " Better luck next time, eh." " Yeah." " Hello Dan." " Hello Maloney." " How's for a snoop." " Go right ahead." "Did we do it or did we do it?" " Finished, sir." " Fine, Max." "Cutie." "Fetch the great Poster his tonic." " Huh?" " You know what I mean." "My wild egg." "My laughing water." "Oh!" "You mean the giggling water." " That's what I mean." " Yes, sir." "Max, have you got five dollars?" "Sure." "Three... four... five." "Fine, thanks." "There you are, honey." "Thank you, Mr. Poster." "There you are, you great big toothpaste ad." "Max, that's alright." "Keep it." "That makes it 11 bucks I owe you." "Big hearted Poster doesn't care who he owes or how much." "Mm." "Right from the bathtub, huh?" " Buy yourself a drink, cutie." " Thank you, Mr. Poster." "Come on, Bee." "Get in on the celebration." "Hurray!" "And the town's sure talking about you alright this a.m." "Talking about me?" "Say, they're screaming." "They're yelling." "Here's to me, Bee." "You sure got what gets 'em, boy." "You said it, girl." "And by the way, Bee." "How old are you?" "Remind me someday to give you a break." "I've had a break, honey." "Get outta here." "Get out." "[telephone ringing]" "(Poster) 'Hey!" "'" "Thank you, Mr. Poster." "I-I-I can get on back to work." "Thank you, sir." "(Bee) 'I'm holding the wire.'" "Mr. Poster, it's a dame." "Sounds blonde." " Alley.." " Oop." "Remind me to call Warner Winch A Louie Sober O'Sullivan." "My erstwhile rival columnist." "I wanna brag a little bit about scooping his town." "And don't forget the very odd Mclntire and old Kal Coolidge." "Announcing Ms. Peggy Bannon." " 'Hello, Peggy.'" " Peggy darling to you." "If she snaps it up we can make the mail edition." "Well, see what she can do about it." "Alright, fine." "Alley-oop." "Hiya, Bannon." "Put it there." "Right there, honey." "What's the matter with right here?" "Okay." "Speaking as a first class newspaper man, Ms. Bannon is it true that you think I'm wonderful?" "I started that rumor." "[telephone ringing]" "Hello." "Yes." "Just a minute." "I'll see if I can find him." "It's for you, Mr. Poster." "Sounds like a foreigner." "Tony." "Bee, you talk to him." "I'll listen in on this wire." "Hello." "Now, plug me in on 426, would you, please?" "Sorry, I can't locate him." "Shall I have him call you?" "No, no, no." "I just wanna know how he feels." "It's his pal, Tony Mugatti." "(Bee) 'Yes, Mr. Mugatti." "Is there any message?" "'" "No, no." "Just tell him, I keep good touch on him." "Tell him, take good care himself." "Hmm." " My royal Hawaiian." " He sounded kinda strange." "Good old Tony Mugatti." "The double-threat man." "He slips you a drink with one hand and then a stiletto with the other." "What'll he do?" "Oh." "What's the matter with you, honey?" "Oh, I'm so worried about you." "Oh." "You know, it's kinda nice to have someone worry about me." "Peggy, you're a sweet thing." "I don't know why you put up with me." "Because every once in a while like now you forget to go into that routine of yours." "And you're just what I used to love you for being." " A little boy inside." " A little boy?" "Where do you get that stuff?" "You can say the dumbest things." "Here." "That's a good-looking stone." "Four and six-eighth carats and it's pure as my own thoughts." "The nicest ring in the world." "You gave it to me." "I don't like the mounting." "It makes the stone look too small." "I'll take it to Kacheys and have it reset." "[knock on door]" "For Mr. Poster." "I'm to wait for an answer." "I'll take it, Bee." " Is it important?" " No." "The Tammany boys want me to run for president." "[intense music]" "[music continues]" "I like your gutters, Poster." "I hope you'll like mine." "We'll start with breakfast on the yacht." "I wonder what the rules say to doing a case like this." "Ah, my diamond in the rough." "Polish me, my vogue, my vanity fair." "Smooth over those rough and uncouth edges." "I love it." "Come on, that's enough." "You're too rich for my blood." " By the way, how is your blood?" " Blue." "According to the book." "How's yours?" "They lost the book on me, darling." "I'm just a mongrel at heart, but very gentle." "Affectionate to children and kind to blind men." "Ah." "Get some more, Poster." "I like it." "Okay, Huntington." "But listen, I'm serious." "Now, really." "Should I tell you what I think of you?" "You're like the splash of waves on a starry night.." "On a lonely beach." "Lovely." "Go on." "You're like the thrill of the great dawn.." "Before it breaks into daylight." " A penny for your thought." " Pay me." "Oh!" "For me?" "Why... why, yes." "Sure." "Why not?" "You're not kidding me by any chance?" "Not by any chance." "(man on radio) 'At the count of two, back to the starting position.'" "'At the count of three, let the left arm go down' 'touch the left knee and extend the right arm over the head.'" "'At the count of four, back to original position.'" "'Ready." "Begin." "One, two, three, four.'" "'One, two, three, four.'" "'One, two, down, up." "One, two, three, four.'" "'One, two, down, up." "One, two, three, four.'" "'One, two, down, up." "One, two, three, four.'" "Well, what a fertile field for a rising young columnist." "What did you say, dear?" "Nothing." "I was just mumbling in my beard." "That's all." "Good evening." "Morning Gazette." "Mr. Poster?" "Well, he's not in." "He's broadcasting tonight for the Gazette News hour." "Oh, you're welcome." "[orchestral music]" "And now, we will look through the keyhole to the city with Mr. William Poster of the Morning Gazette." "Hello, Uncle Sam and your 48 grand and glorious children." "'This is your little hometown tattler'" "'William Poster, speaking.'" "Get this, folks." "Hot from the griddle of high society." "Some of the goods in the howdy-rowdies of Park Avenue." "Which I picked up during a dizzy flight of a wild potty on a New York heiress' yacht." "'While most of you were eating your breakfast.'" "'I saw Joyce Gulliver there with three new diamond bracelets' and her latest conquest, hanging on her arm." "A bright little girl, Joyce." "She used to marry men she wouldn't even speak to." "'Now, tenderly laid out in the corner' 'with a certain well known broker.'" "He had balanced his books at last... with a blonde on one arm and a brunette on the other." "'A lot of things beside sailing are done on the yacht.'" "'Yes, ma'am." "I heard that Cynthia Thomas had gone' 'to Paris to shop for divorce.'" "'Diana Pierce was there.'" "She recently said yes to her chauffer." "Where was he?" "'On the dock, in the driver's seat' 'of the Rolls Royce as usual.'" "'Waiting for his rich wife to come back and say'" ""Home, James."" "'You would be surprised what society dowager I saw.'" "'With three gigolos." "One for each chin." "Ha, ha, ha.'" "Friends, if you remember, I scooped the town a few days ago on.." "As I was saying, I scooped the town a few days ago on the sensational murder of Angelo Spinelli." "And Tony Mugatti's dizzy water parlor." "Today, I've a little love letter from Tony." "And like a giggling school girl I'm going to read it to you." ""Poster." Imagine that guy left off the mister." ""Talk anymore and it's finished with you." Signed "Tony."" "Well, Tony, I didn't say in my column that you committed the murder." "But since you're trying to get me to back down" "I'll tell you what I told the grand jury this afternoon." "Tony Mugatti killed Angelo Spinelli in cold blood." "Now, I'm broadcasting that to you, Tony." "And to the whole United States of America." "That should be sweet music to your ears." "And speaking of music, let's have some, huh?" "Excuse me, dear." "[orchestral music]" "Well, baby." "Fancy seeing you here." "How's it going, honey?" "Tell me something." " You know everything I know." " No." "Not everything." "No." "Now, I didn't think that you'd turn me down for a social register." "Oh, now, take it easy, honey." "Don't get tosh, Peggy." "You can't help those things." "They just happen, that's all." "Why don't you laugh it off?" "Oh, I've laughed off things for you for five years." "I've cheated, lied, stole and made a nuisance of myself." "And for what?" "For you." "Just for you." "You're plenty tough today, aren't you?" "Tough?" "You haven't seen anything yet." "I'm going to walk out of here in about two minutes." "And when I walk out, I'll be walking out of your life." "You know where I'm going?" "No." "Where are you going?" "I'm going over to Ed Maloney on The Examiner and tell him the whole story." " Story of what?" " Of you and me." "The inside story." "The sodded low down, will he.." "You wouldn't sell me out like that." "Maloney hates me like poison." "You didn't sell me out, did you?" ""Maloney", I'll say to him." ""Poster's marrying that Huntington dame."" "Yes, marrying her." "Throwing me out in the street after I've loved him for five years." "After I helped him get everything he's ever owned." "After I put him where he is." "I nursed him." "I cooked his meals over a gas burner." "I slaved for him." "But what he gave me getting married?" "I wasn't good enough." "Why, he even took the ring off my finger and gave it to her." "How's that for a story, Maloney?" "You wouldn't do a thing like that..." "Oh, that's right." "Turn yellow." "Society must've lost its sense of decency to let a cheap baboon like you marry into a class." "I'm sick of you." "I'm sick of the whole business." "I hate you." "After five years." "That's gratitude for you." "'Oh!" "Then you know that word.'" "Say, what is this?" "I suppose it was gratitude that made you broadcast that filthy gossip about my friends." "In return to my hospitality." "Hospitality?" "That must be a new word for it." "For what?" "What you and I have been to each other." "Let's get this straight, Poster." "I was bored." "You amused me." "Like going to the flea circus dance." "Oh, I've gotta give you credit." "You were new and pretty." "My mother always told me that if I played in the gutter" "I'd get my shoes dirty." "Here." "I suggest you wear it in your nose." "Alright, you snooty blue-blood." "I hope you choke on caviar." "Operator, get me The Examiner." "Make it snappy." "You're on the air in two minutes, Mr. Poster." "Okay, son." "Scram-scram." "[telephone ringing]" "Yeah?" "It's Poster." "William Poster." "Who?" "Ed Maloney?" "Never heard of him." "Maybe, he works on The Times." "Maybe, there isn't even any such a paper." "How do I know?" "Operator." "Operator!" "Circle 7-6-7-7-9." "That's right." "Hurry, Mr. Poster." "There's only half a minute." "Alright, son." "Alright." "Alright." "Hello.." "Operator, come on." "Give me a little service, will you?" "[telephone ringing]" "Hello." "In bed." "None of your business." "Well, come to life." "Find Ed Maloney for me." "Tell him, I've gotta see him now." "I want him to kill a story for me." "Jump in a cab and get to office." "Now, listen, Mr. Poster." "I've just gotta get some sleep." "You can't talk to me like that, Mr. Poster." "'I work enough during day and I'm not coming now.'" "And I'm resigning right now." "I'm not taking abuse from you and you can get another girl." "And furthermore, I'm gonna stay right here and sleep and I'm not gonna get up tonight." "Put that in your.." "Oh, why don't you answer?" "Hello?" "Hello?" "Imagine that." "Who's he think I am." "The iron horse around here or something?" "Oh, I won't go." "That's all." "I'll show him. 35 bucks a week in a place like this." "Come?" "Where's my coat?" "Call me up, down there, a taxi inside around here." "Oh, I won't go." "That's all." "[machine rattling]" "(Ed) '"Scandalmonger gets wires crossed in love.'" "'"At last the dirt's on him.'" "'"Mildred Huntington, society heiress, today'" "'"was wearing a diamond ring that for five years sparkled'" "'"on the engagement finger of Peggy Bannon of Broadway.'" ""Ms. Bannon who was popularly credited" ""with being largely responsible in helping Poster" ""to fame and fortune" ""flatly declared that she would not super breach a promise." ""Affections that have been sued for she declared are worthless."" "Nice story, Maloney." "(Maloney) 'I don't see your own poison, Poster.'" "I'm turning the type-writer lose on you for a change." "Just to show you how cheap you are before that big circulation of yours you're so proud of." "Listen, Maloney." "And this is on the up and up." "If you use this story, you're just gonna kiss yourself right out of a job." "But, my dear Poster." "This is the sob story of a generation." "Why, this is a bigger story than that speak easy murder." "Just look who you were." "All kidding aside did I ever cross you?" " No." " You know what I mean." "If this situation was reversed" "I wouldn't make a sucker out of you." "I can do a lot of good if you play ball." "You're gonna do me a lot of good?" "Why, listen, you sap." "You won't be here to do it." "I'm gonna do this town the greatest favor in it's history tomorrow afternoon." "And win myself a marble monument right in the middle of Times Square." "The man that drives you out of the town will be a hero." "When you pick up tomorrow afternoon's Examiners." "You're gonna find yourself featured in 12 point black face italics, right at the top of the page." "So, you're gonna print that story, huh?" "Right you are, sir." "Pardon the sir." "There's nothing to stop it?" "Not a cock-eyed thing." "Swell!" "Great!" "Ha, ha, ha." "Now, you're printing that story tomorrow afternoon, huh?" "See what I'm printing this morning." "My last edition hasn't gone to press yet." "The story I'm gonna print is gonna make you a baboon." "(Poster) 'Take this down, Bee.'" "Why, I barely made it that time." "I'll show you what a man does." "Slug this in for the lead in this morning's last edition." "One afternoon, rag will carry the yarn of your correspondence engagement to Ms. Mildred Huntington." "One of the things the author of this squif doesn't know is that yours truly was aired and double aired last night." "First by the Broadway dolly and second by the social refrigerator areas." "Thus putting a tear jerker finish to the one-day romance with Park Avenue and five long and happy years with the sweetest gal in all the world." "Happy years?" "Certainly happy years." "Why not happy years?" "What do you mean by insinuating they weren't happy years?" "Wasn't Peggy happy?" "I was happy." "I didn't think you had it in you." "Oh, you didn't, eh?" "Well, I've got what it takes and all Broadway knows it." "I can fish it out and I can take it, too." "I've got what they call comeback." "Comeback for more, good or bad." "Why, I'm the guy that started this chatter racket." "And a million imitators got famous on my leftovers." "Did any of them touch me?" "Did any of them pan a dirt off Broadway and wash it pure gold." "Huh?" "That's why they call me the modern priest." "Text bad boy and a little tapper." "Why, I'm the guy that made Broadway famous." "Why don't you guys say something?" "Boy, you said it all." "You're rootin'-tootin' right I have." "Take that copy down to Kelly in the composing room, right away." "Say, you're not so dumb." "You had me fooled for years." "Not bad." "Not bad." "Hey, you're wear yourself out going back and forth." "Why don't you bring it over here?" "It's not a bad idea." "Take it easy." "You know, that little Peggy was a sweet gal." "When I lost her it was just like cutting out my own heart." "I had a girl once in Moscow." "She's a knock-out." "Alga Slovenski." "Good old Alga." "I don't blame her for walking out on me." "She's the only gal in the world that was crazy enough to stay in love with a mug like me as long as she did." "Good old Alga." "So long, Will." "Pal-o-pal." " Stay sober." " I may at that." "Say, let's get together sometime and drink it over, huh?" "Anytime, boy." "Hello, Tony." "What's the matter?" "Couldn't you find the door?" "Come on in, Tony." "Pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable." "I'm glad to see you." "I come to tell you funny little story." "Sure, come on right in, Tony." "You sure got a lot of nerve, Tony Mugatti." "Here you are." "A man accused of murder." "If anyone was to find out that you were in my office right now." "All the cops in town will be up here in no time." "Oh, that's the way it goes." "Up and down." "Hasn't he tried to call me, at all?" "You know, it's funny." "He's called down here many times to find out if you were trying to get in touch." " Oh, yeah?" " Oh, yes." "It's the same with Jimmy and me." "We get mad at each other." "Neither one of us wanna be the first to break down and make up." "Nice a thing you do for Tony." "I hear you on the radio." "So, you listen to me on the radio too, huh, Tony?" "That's swell." "Do you know how many people hear me on the radio now?" "Well, when I first started they were just a few thousand." "But on the last checkup, well, they estimate that millions listen in when I go on the air." "Why, they listen to me from coast to coast." "It's a too bad they listen to you no more." "Ah, snap out of it, Tony." "I can't go for those speak easy gags." "It's no gag, Mr. Poster." "[gunshot]" " Oh!" " What's the matter?" "Uh, shot." "Mr. Poster's office." "Hello?" "(Peggy) 'Just because you were lucky enough' 'to pull through this mess, don't think you can keep... '" "(William) 'Alright, alright, honey." "Don't start preaching.'" "'From now on, I'm gonna be everybody's big brother.'" "'Ha, ha." "Say, I wonder if they ever caught Tony.'" "Here." "Thanks." "Oh, you double crossing rat!" "You scooped me on my own shooting, huh?" "Uh-huh!" "Is my face red?" "[instrumental music]" "[music continues]"