"The first adventure" "Blas, Blas!" "They caught the thief." "They caught him!" "Eh?" "Yonder he comes, along the Calvary way, with the police." " What does he say?" " That they caught the thief." "He was caught!" "And who is it?" "Remigio." "Mother of mine!" " Remigio the navvy?" " Precisely." "Holy Virgin!" "Bakery." "I was coming from the mill and saw him leave the house with the..." " Warn the priest and the teacher." " About what?" "Remigio, he's with the officers, he's the thief." "Bastard, to enter the house of God to take the money!" "Let's go for him." " Hey, you." " What is amiss?" "It's that I'm the mayor and I'm the one in charge." "A guy stole the virgin's money and you go for half-measures?" " Easy, man!" " Come everybody to spit his face." "Let's go for him." "Have you seen?" "Remigio." "No wonder to me." "The illiterate!" "What could we expect?" "He used to attend Mass every Sunday." "So what?" "Hey, bull!" "Hey, bull!" "Bull!" "Hey, bull!" "Look, here." "Hey, bull, hey!" "Gypsy, Gypsy." "Gypsy!" "Look." "Well, Father, who would have thought!" "Remigio." "These were in his house." "Are these of the Virgin?" "Yes, I marked them." "Thief, rogue, scoundrel!" "Pig." "Cosme." "Why did you do it?" "You know we've been saving for a year... to buy the picture of the Virgin." "Everyone contributed." "I contributed, too." "Where is the rest?" "Don't worry, Father, he'll tell us." "Come, move on." " Bastard." "To enter the sacristy and steal." " Bad Christian." "What nerve." "Have him return the money, man." "Rogue." "Thief." "Scoundrel." "Heretic." "To the jail!" "Gypsy." " Gypsy." " Come on, let's go." "Let's go." "Hey, dad." "Do you think Remigio was the thief?" "Yes." "I don't." "You were friends, huh?" "Look, son, Remigio is very poor... and the poor sometimes have temptations and steal." "You too?" "Me too, what?" "Nothing, father." "Gypsy." "Gypsy!" "Steady." "Freeze!" "Whoa, whoa." "Damn beast!" "Here." "Gypsy." "Gypsy!" "Gypsy, come here!" "And you know where he kept it?" "In the mattress." "He made a hole and put the bills inside." "What do you think?" "Smart-ass!" "And then he tells the officers that it wasn't him." "Bah!" "Maybe it's true." "But are you a fool?" "And you stay as calm as if it was not our money." "Hi." "Because I gave money for the Virgin, too, right?" "What did you give?" "Two bucks." "Oh man, this is really funny!" "Hello." "You're not married to El Cordobés, the bullfighter." "You get it?" "I'm a muleteer and I barely make ends meet." "You know what I mean?" "If I were the priest, I'd make a fuss!" "If a guy cheats on me, I'll kill him." "And what's wrong with you?" "Come on, eat." "Climb up." "What about me?" "I don't count, right?" " Hush." " Sure, I don't count." "I never count at all." "Hush, if they hear us they'll put us in jail." "Remigio." "Remigio!" " Remigio." " Remigio!" "Remigio!" " Hello." " Hello, Remigio." " Hello, Remigio." " Hello." " And Pepín, didn't he come?" " Yes, I'm here!" "But I don't count, never at all." " We can't lift him up." " You don't want to." "Hey, Pepín, stay quiet, huh?" "Do you hear me?" "Are we friends, yes or no?" "Yes." "Good." "Juan, it wasn't me." "I didn't steal." "We already know that." "Someone put the money in the mattress." "Who was it?" " If only I knew!" " And what will they do to you?" "How should I know?" "They'll take me to Madrid." "If you want, we'll tell the priest it wasn't you." "You know what?" "I'm happy." "Since I could never go out of the village..." " Everyone says you're a bad person." " Not you." " Remigio, Remigio!" " What?" "Do you have a belt?" "If you throw it, I'll hang on to it so I can see you." "There it goes." "I can't reach." "Pull." "Hi." " Scoundrel!" " Camel." " Tadpole." " Beetle with crooked legs." " Widower ox." " Hey, my pants fell down." "What are you doing there?" "Quick, go away." "So that's what you're up to, huh?" "He wanted to commit suicide." " Hey, what are you're doing?" " Hold him." "He wanted to commit suicide." "Okay, but I just..." "Get to work, Fernaud." "And why did they take Remigio if he said it wasn't him?" "Because grown-ups are like that." "They're always telling lies and then if you tell the truth you get spanked." "You know Remigio well, right?" " You think he may be the thief?" " Of course not." " What did your father say?" " That Remigio is the robber because he is poor." " Would they have believed him if he was rich?" " How do I know!" "What shall we do?" "Fight, fight them all." "Do you remember when I got a burn here?" "We need to find the thief." " We?" " Yes." "I am Corporal Rusty." "And how are we going to find him?" "Smell Gypsy, smell." "And what should he smell?" "The robber put the money here, so the smell of the thief is here." "Dogs have a great smell." "Like Rin Tin Tin." "Smell, Gypsy, take a good smell." "Now let's go to Mass and at the exit, Gypsy will sniff out all the people in town." "And the one he follows, that's him." "Great." "Smell, smell, Gypsy, yes." "My children, today I speak in great pain." "One of our parishioners has committed the sin of coveting what was not his... and committed sacrilege and theft." "I once read in a book... that a man approached another and said:" ""I know your secret"... and the man turned pale and began to tremble." "This writer defended the idea... that everybody has a lifelong secret, that everybody has something to be ashamed of." "I'd want, my beloved children, that all of you who belong to my flock, had a clear life." "A life as transparent as glass." "That if anybody might says to you:" ""I know your secret", you'd simply reply with a smile." "A children's smile, from unstained souls destined for the Kingdom of Heaven... where our Lord awaits us." "Gypsy!" " Gypsy!" " Gypsy!" "Gypsy!" "Gypsy!" "Gypsy, Gypsy!" "Gypsy!" "Gypsy, come here." "You have to find the thief." "Smell, take a good smell, Gypsy." "Take a good smell, Gypsy." "This way." "Hey bitch, get out!" "Out!" "Out!" "Dog, I'll...!" "It's him, the thief." "Yes, it's him." "Let's tell the priest." "What for?" "And how do we prove it?" "He won't believe us." "Ay, ay, ay!" "How big he is!" " Then what do we do?" " We'll scare him." " Scare that guy?" " That one." "We should send him death messages." ""Either you turn yourself in, or else you'll die."" "But that guy will kill us." "I want to do my First Communion." "Shut up, you idiot." "María, come here." " Hey!" "Where're you going?" " Home." "But... aren't you a man?" "María, we must save Remigio." "I have a plan." "But it has to be a secret." "Promise not to tell anyone." " I promise." " Me too." "You'll make First Communion and telling lies is a very big sin." "You promise not to say a thing?" " Okay." " Even if they rip out your eyes?" " Both of them or just one?" " Both." "Okay." "Even if they put a burning iron in your navel." "And why has it to be burning?" "Burning." "Do you promise or not?" "Okay." "We'll start tonight." " What's going on?" " Wake up, the bell tolls." "Someone died." "They're toiling for the dead." "For sure it was Aunt Petra." "May God take her in his holy bosom." "Ave María Purisima, conceived without sin." "12 o'clock, spirits' hour." "What the hell?" "Have all of you gone nuts?" "They're toiling for a deceased." "Bah, dead my foot!" "Is that a proper toll for a deceased?" "Besides, what time is this to toll for a deceased?" "Better go see the priest." "God save us!" " They're toiling for a deceased." " I hear." " But what's up?" "Why?" " Did someone die?" "Calm down, we'll learn soon." "Now let's go to the church." "Say, Father, do you think...?" "What's going on?" "It's scary." " There's the mystery." " That's it, a donkey!" " Dammit!" " What a mess." "A message." "Cosme, I know your secret." "But what the hell?" "Since when does the priest devote himself to play pranks?" "Me?" "Let's see, today's sermon." "But you're wasting your time, buddy." "I have nothing to hide." "Cosme, I assure you, I don't understand." "Oh, no?" "This donkey is yours, right?" "And the rope, whose is it?" "And the bell?" "Enough, Cosme." "I don't play pranks." "Then who did?" "Who was it?" "I warn you, I won't stop until I know." "And I'll crush the guilty one's head." "You get it?" "His head!" " He's not coming." " He must come." "Aunt Petra is very ill." "Have you seen?" "Everyone's talking about yesterday." "Yes, but they say it was a prank." "So?" "We must go on." "That's why we're here." " Good morning, doctor." " Good morning." "Here." "Hey, Juan, won't he die?" "Do you want to help Remigio, yes or no?" "How can he possibly die?" "Don't you see the doctor's here?" "Come on." "Careful with the gasoline." "I can't get in." "Everything is screwed up." " You'll fit." " Me?" "Yes, you." "Do you want me to go in there?" "He's too little, Juan." "Oh, nonsense!" "Cosme isn't home." "What's the danger?" " What if he comes?" " Him coming, my foot!" "Look, if he comes he'll kill me." "I want to do my First Communion." "Listen, Pepín, we have to save Remigio." "Do you understand?" "But I really have a stomach ache." "You're always telling me that you're Corporal Rusty, Rin Tin Tin's friend." "I have to go to the toilet." "It's okay." "You know what you are?" "A coward, a coward." "Come, let's go." "Pig, I'm not a coward!" "You're going in?" "If Gypsy goes with me, yes." "Gypsy?" "What do you want Gypsy for?" "Somebody must defend me, right?" "Else what?" "I don't count at all, right?" "He's right." "Okay, come on." "Take the paper." "Listen: after doing it, just open the door and come out as if nothing's up." "OK?" "What if Cosme comes?" " He won't come." " What if he does?" "We'll sing "The bald girl" for you." "Come on, don't be so afraid." " Gypsy will defend you, man." " All right, man." "Here." "Grab the gasoline." "If he comes, you bite him, eh?" "Surrender to the officers or die like a dog." "♪ Bald girl, hairless, ♪" "♪ bald, hairless, hairless. ♪" "♪ Four hairs that you had you sold them as a scourer. ♪" "♪ Bald girl. bald girl, bald girl!" "♪ ...Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven..." "Kill him, Gypsy, kill him." "Kill him." "Gypsy, Gypsy." "And I want to file a complaint." "Nobody should pull my leg." "When I catch the prankster, I'll crush him." " Easy, man, no big deal." " No big deal?" "What about my reputation?" "Bah!" "Surrender to the officers or die like a dog." "What about this?" " What can I say?" " You're the mayor, right?" "Listen:" "I give you 24 hours to discover that scoundrel." "And I swear when I have him, I'll crush him." "I'll strangle him." "It looks like a child's handwriting." "Don't you think so?" "He won't cheat me!" "You expect him to write down his name?" "I know the trick." "It's easy to imitate a child's handwriting, buddy, but I'm not that naive." "This was written by a guy with a full beard." "The first glass always tastes bad." "Listen to me:" "I'm willing to give a reward." "Mind what I say: 10 bucks." "10 bucks for who tells me who's the author of..." "A bomb!" "Terrorists!" "A bomb!" "Municipality employees, come to me!" "Pepín, Pepín!" "Tomorrow we'll plant another one." "Right, man?" "And Don Pelayo in the Covadonga mountains... won the first battle against the Moors." "Thus began the Reconquista in Spain... which ended centuries later... when the Catholic Kings conquered Granada." "Silence, silence." "Nobody move." "On behalf of the mayor of the town:" "citizen Don Cosme Pan Para Cuatro... offers 20 bucks reward... to whom provides information about the author or authors... of the vile attack he suffered this morning." "He who knows something shall communicate it at the Town Hall." "Do confess, dog." "Come on, Juan, the Reconquista of Spain." "The Reconquista of Spain began with Don Pelayo." "And Don Pelayo did the Reconquista in Spain... because then there was no Reconquista in Spain, until Don Pelayo made the Reconquista in Spain." "Go on." "The Reconquista in Spain began in the cave of Covadonga." "That was because the Reconquista in Spain was a very difficult thing." "Don Pelayo chose a cave to escape the bombardments by planes... and so to quickly end the Reconquista in Spain." "Planes?" "Planes?" "Come here." "Come now." "What's that paper?" "Bring that paper." "Bring it, I said." "Give it to me." "Who screamed?" "Who was it?" "Who screamed?" "It was this girl." "María, come here." "Why did you scream?" "I saw a mouse this big." "Quiet!" "Quiet!" "Be quiet!" "Be quiet!" "Be quiet." "♪ The devil's telling you in your ear: ♪" "♪ don't pray the Rosary, keep sleeping. ♪" "♪ Long live Virgin Mary, long live the Rosary. ♪" "♪ Long live St Domingo who founded it. ♪" "Very well, very well." "Let's see, who knows another song?" "Great." "Come on, sing." "Silence everybody." "Eh?" "♪ Bald girl, hairless, ♪" "♪ four hairs that you had you sold them as a scourer. ♪" "No, no, no, no." "Listen, Pepín, listen." "Listen everyone." "Now that you are going to do First Communion... you must know that in church only religious songs are sung." "And this one that goes ♪ Bald girl, hairless... ♪ isn't religious but a drunk's song." "Isn't it?" "Yes." "Let's see, Pepín." "Do you know what "faith" is?" "Of course, that's easy." "What is faith?" "Faith is an F and A and I and T and H." "Well, yes." "Yes, not bad." " Hey, Father." " What?" " Did God make everything?" " Everything, son." "Everything, everything, everything, everything?" "Everything." "So why did he make nettles, that sting so much?" "Because with nettles you can also make a medicine... to cure the pains of certain people." "Do you understand?" "Of course man, you're such a fool!" " Father." " Tell me, daughter." "Was Jesus killed by bad guys?" "Yes, child, yes, the bad guys." "Is it true that no child killed him?" "Sure, daughter, no child." "And why are the bad guys always adults?" "Because... just because." "You'll know when you're older." "Of course man, you're such a fool!" "I'm what?" "I'll punch you one!" "Move on, it's over." "See you tomorrow, God willing." "See you tomorrow, Father." "And memorize the 10 commandments for tomorrow." "Nobody fails me, huh?" "Hey, Father." "Why do men have mustaches and women don't?" "Move on, go, I'll explain it tomorrow." "He really doesn't know." "In the bag." "How lucky!" "How lucky!" "Knowing how to play and they call it luck." "There's the guy, so calm." "You go home." "Come on, Pepín." "Come on, Gypsy." " Here." " 20 gold ones." "Knowing how to play, you're just lucky!" "You're no opponent for me." " Look at the rascal!" "You won the bullfight." " Wait, wait." "Come on, deal." "Another wine." " Hello, dad." " Hello." "Let's see if you can beat this one." " This one?" "In the bag!" " Damn." "Is it possible?" "Hey, you're not cheating are you?" "Say that that again and you'll be up for a fight." "You get it?" "Lucky one!" "Science, buddy." "Wisdom." "Bah!" "Hey, Fermín, bring some olives." " Stuffed or pitted?" " Serve half and half, man." " And two glasses of red wine, Fermín." " Okay." "What are you afraid of when your father's there?" " Zero to one with Zamora as goalkeeper." " Is it possible?" "I don't even get one!" "Cut them." "What do you think?" "There you go." "This can't be!" "I'm cursed!" "Damn!" "Look how wonderful!" "Come on, go mourn in the asylum." "Share some snuff, you're winning." "Come on, don't be a scab." "In the bag." "But how can you have the ace?" " Hey, dad." " Leave me alone." " Yes, I have the ace." "What's the matter?" " How lucky, how lucky!" " Hey, dad." " What the hell do you want?" "Look." "So you know how to play, huh?" "Cheater." "Cheater!" "Who's there?" " Who's there?" " It's me, dad." " What's the matter?" " I need to pee." "What a way to walk." "It sounds like a stud!" "I don't know what they teach them at school." "What are you doing?" "I have to pee." "What, already done?" "Nah, I don't need to!" "You don't need to?" "I told father." "I'll do the first communion." "You don't want me to tell a lie." "I should pee." "Come on, don't be a pest." "I said I have to pee, man!" "It won't come out, and if you rush me, it'll be worse." "The donkey!" "I can't, I'm scared." "Soon after this warning you'll be killed" "Who's there?" "Good people." "Who's knocking at this hour?" "Oh, help, help!" "I'm being invaded, they released a bull!" "He's killing me!" "I repeat I know nothing." "My mule was stolen." "Lies!" "You have my word." " But didn't you hear anything?" " Nothing, not a sound." "Rotten lies!" "Shut up at once, there's no authority here but me." "Okay, you can leave." "And you just let him go?" "What kind of a mayor are you?" "You know he's telling the truth." "The truth...!" "I don't care shit for what he says." "The goat is his, right?" "He'll pay for all damages." "I know the law." "Cosme, your time has come." "I think you best leave town for a while." "Let's see, calm down." "Didn't you see anybody at all?" "Didn't you hear any strange noise?" "The barking." "The barking." "There was a dog, too." "A filthy dog grabbed my leg." "A dog?" "While that horned beast gave me head butts..." " the dog put his teeth in me." " And how was the dog like?" "How do I know?" "You think that I was up to paying attention to details?" " But was he big or small?" " Huge." "To get rid of him I put my foot on his ear... and he began to howl, the damn one." " On the ear?" " On the ear." "Buddy, I think within an hour we'll know who the author is of all of these." " How are you, Felix?" " Bah!" "Nice dog." "Yes, sir." " Can I pet him?" " Yes." "Good coat, huh?" "Yes." "Is it yours?" "He belongs to us three." "And who are these three?" "Me, and Juan and María." "Well, I'm leaving." " Are you going to meet them?" " Yes, sir." "Wait a minute, I'm coming with you." "Move on, Gypsy." "And now you'll tell me everything, rogue." "It was you three who put the donkey in my house, right?" "Say it." "Answer." "Damn dog!" "Juan!" "María!" "Juan!" "María!" "He killed Gypsy." "He killed him!" "He's dead." "Gypsy, Gypsy." "Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name." "Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners..." "It was Cosme, he killed Gypsy." "He killed him." "It was Cosme." "He killed Gypsy." "He killed him." "You all go and get him." "Let's go." "Come on." "Help!" "Help!" "Help me!" "Say it was you who stole the money of the Virgin." "Say it was you." "Bite him, bite him until he tells the truth." "I'll tell everything." "I did it!" "It was me." "Where do you keep the money of the Virgin?" "At home." "At home!" "It wasn't Remigio!" "Remigio is innocent!" "Yes, he is innocent!" "Keep off the dogs." "Back off." "Look, he's coming." "There." "He's arriving." " Did you learn the speech?" " Don't worry." "We have to show him that we never believed he was the thief." "Of course." "Remigio!" "Remigio!" "Remigio!" " Remigio!" " Remigio!" "Pepín!" "Remigio!" "Remigio, Remigio!" "What about me?" "Sure, I don't count, I'm never taken into account." "What's up, Pepín?" "Hop, hop!" "Subtitles by jpf Editing by Subransu" "The End"