"(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)" "(CHILDREN LAUGHING)" " Merry Christmas." " Merry Christmas." "Mr Venus, your opinion." "You know him?" "I've had that face thrust in mine often enough." "His name is Jacob Marley." "And what in the world would cause Mr Marley here to thrust his face in yours?" "11 shillings and sixpence." "At least that's what I borrowed." "But Mr Marley here turned it into a debt three times that." "A moneylender?" "I had cause to purchase the bones of a deformed primate for my collection." "If you please, Mr Venus." "I'll tell you what I can." " A crack to the head." " Oh." " Hit with some force." " From where?" "I'd say from the front to the side of the head." "There's a bruise here, above the ear, long and narrow." "A cosh?" "Made of wood." "Merry Christmas." "I know her, she'll expect me to be there for lunch." "Which, my dear Havisham, is precisely why you won't be going." "It's Christmas Day." "You described your sister to me as headstrong," " wilful." " Yes." "No doubt because she is accustomed to getting what she wants." "Father doted on her." "Then it's high time she learned a very valuable lesson." "That not all men will do her bidding." "The plan is simply for you to ingratiate yourself with her." "Become her friend, offer her counsel, advise her to revoke the will." "Do you want what's rightfully yours?" " Yes." " So?" "So..." "What will you say to her?" "That..." "That I am troubled on discovering that..." "The man that I struck in her defence was..." "In fact her brother." "That I am keen to..." "Make amends, to mediate in order to unite the family." "In memory of her late father, and the true spirit of Christmas." "(BOTH LAUGHING)" "Well, be careful." "She may be a girl but she is nobody's fool." "She's still a Havisham." "Leave the goose to the fox, Arthur." "I shall deliver her once she's been plucked." "Didn't know we was expected to bring our own food." "It's Christmas Day!" "A few little gifts, that's all." "Ain't you in the spirit?" " I've got half a pork pie." " Where's the other half?" "Some I ate, some I used to bait the rat traps." "I trimmed it." "Made it look like it was bought as a half." "Yeah, mum's the word." "If it's not eaten, I'm bringing it back." "(CHILDREN LAUGHING)" "Oh!" "(CHUCKLES)" "We bought half a pork pie and a cake to add to the festivities." "Thank you and Merry Christmas." "Not that having to bring refreshment was made clear at the time of the invitation." " Well, I..." " Oh, take no notice of her." "She is not much afflicted by manners or good humour or anything else for that matter." "Apart from sticking her parish pickaxe in other people's business." "(WEGG SIGHS NOISILY)" " Better out than in." " Hmm!" "Mrs Gamp." "Mr Wegg." "Miss Biggetywitch." "What's she got her nose in now?" "MRS GAMP:" "A stranger." "He's still there." " Who is?" " Someone outside Scrooge and Marley's." "He looks official." "Looks like he knows something the rest of us don't." "Mind, I saw a man hanged outside Newgate." "He walked to the gallows with the same air about him." "Cocksure of himself, he was." "And he were a murderer." "Someone get her away from that window." "Well, don't blame me if we're all murdered in our beds." "Ooh!" "Thanks, Mama." "(KISSING)" "Thank you, Pa." "Merry Christmas." "(CHUCKLES)" " Don't you like it?" " Yes!" "Yes, of course I do." "How did we ever afford it?" "Well, that's not for you to worry about, my love." "All you need to do..." "Is wear it." "And remember, it was given to you by a man who knows himself to be the luckiest in the whole of London." " I only knitted you a scarf." " No." "You knitted me a wonderful scarf." " Look at that." " (BOTH CHUCKLE)" "Girls, have you seen what your father's bought me?" "It's beautiful." "GIRL:" "It's so lovely." "(CHUCKLES)" "(CLEARS THROAT)" "(LAUGHS)" "I knew you'd like them." "They're beautiful." " As are you." " (CHUCKLES)" " Let me fetch your present." " Oh, no." "I shall have it after dinner, as always." "But, I promised Amelia I'd call in to see her today." "And I wanted you to have yours before I left." "Because?" "I thought you could wear them for dinner." "And so I shall." "And you don't mind my going to visit Amelia?" "I hate to leave you alone." "No, Frances will be back from church soon." "(CHUCKLES)" "(KISSES)" "(KNOCKS ON DOOR)" "MAN:" "Well, I've been continually pestered by people offering season's greetings, and in doing so, ruining the only thing about Christmas Day worth having, the very peace and quiet they so readily disturb!" " Mr Scrooge?" " Lf you're about to sing, sir," "I shall fetch a bucket of water, as I would for a cat." "If it is charity you seek, then you should know that a portion of my income is already set aside for the poor, in the form of taxes to subsidise the workhouses and treadmills." "If you are simply disturbing me to offer me greetings of the season, then I say, "Humbug", sir." "I'm here neither to sing nor collect for charity." "And although it's not my primary purpose for calling," "I do indeed offer you greetings of the season." "Then state your purpose." "Murder, Mr Scrooge." "I am Inspector Bucket of the Detective, and I'm here to talk of the murder of your partner," "Mr Jacob Marley." "(SIGHS)" "(CLOCK CHIMING)" "FRANCES:" "Where is Honoria?" "Satis House, she's gone to visit Amelia." "And have you told her of our predicament yet?" " No." " May I ask why not?" "She's not like you, Frances, she's not as robust." "It would upset her." " Is she not a part of this family?" " Of course, she is." "Then, she should know that we face financial ruin, should she not?" "Isn't that what families do, Father?" "Share their burdens?" "Why upset her on Christmas Day when there might yet be no need." "I hold some stock that still has value." "On the other side of the world." "If I can find a buyer, it can be transported." "And if it can't?" "Will you still protect Honoria when we are begging in the street?" "(SIGHS)" "SCROOGE:" "One doesn't expect to be dragged out of one's own home by the police." "And on Christmas Day, at that." "Hardly dragged, Mr Scrooge." "A polite request, as I recall." "And, please, be assured that Mrs Bucket is no more thrilled about me being here than you are." "But, with the victim clearly being a gentleman, my superiors were keen that I at least establish his identity and speak to his next of kin." "He had no next of kin." "No one at all?" "Yet you said he finished work early yesterday." "I assumed he had things to do, presents to buy and suchlike, what with it being Christmas Eve." "Jacob Marley buying presents?" "His desk?" "Mmm-hmm." "This is his journal?" "Yes." "May I?" "Well, he won't be needing it any more now, will he?" "There are three entries here for yesterday." "The Old Curiosity Shop." "He had a debt to collect." "In the evening, someone called Nancy at 8:00." "Then a later entry shown simply as a letter "C"." "Jacob kept his own counsel." "It could be a name or..." "Sometimes he used the letter "C" to note a collection had been made." "Yet, it's set alone, Mr Scrooge, not beside a name or a premises." "I can't answer for Jacob's shoddiness, now can I?" "And this Nancy?" "Who might that be?" "I understand he had..." "Arranged for company." "Female company?" "Yes." "And when you say arranged..." "Do I understand that to be a financial arrangement?" "Yes." "I don't suppose you'd know where I might find this Nancy?" "Why should I?" "We were not partners in all things, I can assure you." "So, was he robbed?" "That's difficult to say." "Not knowing what he would normally carry on his person." "Though, he was still in possession of a pocket watch." "And his wallet?" "No wallet was found." "You believe he carried one?" "I never saw him without it." "What kind of thief would take a wallet yet leave a pocket watch?" "Could you describe this wallet for me?" "Brown leather, with his initials, "J.M.", in brass studs." "Vanity." "If I might say so, Mr Scrooge." "You don't seem overly troubled by the sudden and somewhat tragic loss of your partner." "If you make it your mission to seek out someone to shed a tear for Jacob Marley," "I fear you will be sorely disappointed." "He wasn't well liked?" "He was a moneylender." "Well-liked enough at the start of the arrangement, despised at the end of it." "Your problem, Inspector, will not be discovering who hated Jacob Marley enough to kill him," "but rather finding someone who didn't." " (INDISTINCT CHATTERING)" " MAN:" "Merry Christmas!" "Thank heavens you're here!" "I was starting to think I must spend Christmas alone." " Captain Hawdon." " Miss Havisham." "Thank you for inviting us." "I'm not sure we could have seen each other today if you hadn't." "Where's Arthur?" "I haven't seen him since yesterday." "I fear he's not coming." "I don't understand." "We had the reading of Father's will." "He bequeathed Arthur only a portion of the brewery." "With instructions to manage it." "And everything else left to you?" "Well, he must have been furious." "Enough to shout at me in the street." "Without the kindness of a stranger," "I dread to think what might have happened." "A stranger?" "A gentleman was passing." "He came to my aid." "HONORIA:" "Handsome?" "That's hardly the point." "I didn't notice." "Oh, was he so handsome, he rendered you sightless?" "I am here, you know." "Oh, poor James, he's feeling unloved." "Two women to myself and they talk about someone else." " Then we must stop." " I'm sorry." "I will give you both my undivided attention." "We will begin Christmas in earnest." "Glass of sherry." "You look wonderful." "Shouldn't you be wearing black?" "It was Father's wish, that I should wear black to his funeral but no longer." "Well, God bless him for that, but what will people say?" "I will respect his wishes." "Though, I fear it may not make me very popular." "Excuse me, ma'am, you have a caller." "Who is it?" "The stranger I told you about." " Did he say what he wanted?" " No, ma'am." "You must see him." "Mr Compeyson." "Miss Havisham, please forgive the intrusion, but I..." "Felt I had to see you." "On Christmas Day?" "Yes, er..." "In fact, that is rather the point." "Oh." "I have discovered that in my eagerness to protect you yesterday evening," "I may have made a terrible mistake." "How so?" "I've since learned that the young man I struck was, in fact, your brother." "It seems I have unwittingly involved myself in a family dispute, and family is so important, particularly at this time of year." "Even more so, as I understand that your father recently passed." "Yes." "Then, with your permission, I would like to make amends." "And how do you propose to do that?" "Well, I'm here to ask his and your forgiveness." "My brother isn't here." "Oh..." "If I am the cause of his absence, then you must allow me to act as a..." "As a mediary, to call on him to see if the rift can't be healed." "(CHUCKLES) Well, it is Christmas, after all." "Yes, it is, and I have guests waiting." "Mary, would you please?" "Thank you very much for taking the time to call." "It was very kind of you." "We've yet to discuss our strategy." "(CHUCKLES)" "Your brother, reconciliation." "Mr Compeyson." "Much as I applaud your good intentions, what on earth could I or..." "Anyone else have done to give you the impression that I would ask a total stranger to involve himself in my family business?" "Arthur and I will no doubt resolve our differences as we have always done, without the need of a mediary." "Good day." "And Merry Christmas." "Uh..." "AMELIA:" "He offered to talk to Arthur on my behalf." " And you turned him away?" " Yes, I did." "I don't need a man to solve my problems for me." " There's hope for you yet." " (CHUCKLES)" "(CALLS DOG)" " (BARKS) - (LAUGHS)" "BOB:" "Uh..." "Right." "I think I've got this." "That's a horse." " Monster?" " It's you." "What?" "(LAUGHS)" "BOB:" "Oh, well, now you say it, yes." "TIM:" "Your body." "BOB:" "Yes, very good." "TIM:" "Your hair..." " Merry Christmas." " Merry Christmas, sir." "Peter." "I bought you a present, Merry Christmas." "I'm not sure you could be any prettier..." "But..." "Mother says, ribbon in a girl's hair is..." "Very fetching." "Then I'll wear it." "Wouldn't want to disappoint her." "She won't be." "Grandfather said you called a lot." "Asking to see me." "Even waited outside." "I thought if I were close and there were errands to run..." "I can't take a gift without giving one in return." "Sorry it wasn't wrapped." "GRANDFATHER:" "Nell!" " In from the cold!" " Coming." "I have to go." "HONORIA:" "I wish you could come in with me." "Well, when I have my promotion and can support a wife," "I will visit your father and ask, no, demand his permission to call on you." "I hope it's soon." "I can't bear not to be with you." "Soon." "I promise." "Colonel Mortimer is sure to visit the barracks by the end of the month before he leaves for the colonies." "I know he thinks well of me." "Then this Colonel Mortimer has excellent taste." "(CHUCKLES)" "You're late." "Well, I'm here now." " How was Amelia Havisham?" " As well as might be expected." "And Captain Hawdon?" "I saw you." "Like mongrels in the street." "Shameful." "He will gain his promotion soon, and a respectable wage, then, he will come to speak to Father." "Am I to eat Christmas dinner alone?" "No, Father." " A toast." " Ooh!" "My two beautiful daughters." "Let the New Year bring what it may, but for today, in memory of your mother let there be nothing in the Barbary house but laughter." "HONORIA:" "Hear, hear." "Happy Christmas." "BARBARY:" "Happy Christmas." "This is very kind of you, Mr Venus." "I am not much for celebrating Christmas, Inspector, nor much else really, but I..." "I do have a liking for mince pies." "Well, it's filled a gap until I get home to Mrs Bucket, and that's for sure." "Oh." "You'll be heading home, then?" "I have the victim's name and I have ascertained that he has no next of kin," " as my superiors requested." " So..." "If I may ask, what is this..." "This new detecting thing I've been hearing so much about?" "Ah, we have a new department." "To be called "The Detective"." "More than just keeping the peace, we are to be sent out to investigate crimes." "Investigate?" "To gather evidence and to track down the perpetrator of the crime." "We are to be called "detectives"." "Never heard of such a thing." "You think it will catch on?" "I think it rather depends on how I do finding the person who killed Mr Marley." "Now, there's one more thing to do today." "If I'm not back to carve the bird," "Mrs Bucket will not be best pleased." "So, no thoughts yet about who killed him?" "No thoughts as I'm ready to share just yet, Mr Venus." "Though..." "I have learned he was carrying a wallet" " that wasn't to be found." " So, he was robbed?" "Perhaps." "According to his journal, he had an appointment." "8:00 at night at his house." "And though, I will need it confirmed, I have allowed an hour, give or take." "And the body was discovered just before 11:00." "So..." "If my mathematics haven't let me down," "I believe," "Mr Jacob Marley was murdered between 9:00 and 10:30 on Christmas Eve." "Very impressive detectiving, Mr Bucket." "It's a start, Mr Venus." "Just a start." "Merry Christmas to you." "Bill, working on Christmas Day?" "Not dining with the Lord Mayor and his wife?" "They asked, but I turned them down." "So, you came to find me instead, I'm honoured." "You might not be so happy when I tell you who I've just seen." "SCROOGE:" "He was a moneylender." "Your problem, Inspector, will not be discovering who hated Jacob Marley, enough to kill him" "but, rather finding someone who didn't." " Merry Christmas." " (LAUGHS) Thank you." "Thank you, Father." "Where have you been?" "What did she say?" "Is she contrite?" "Conscience-stricken?" " Did she beg for me to go home?" " No." "She threw me out." "(CHUCKLES)" "Without so much as a by your leave, she showed me the damn door." "(LAUGHS)" "She closed it in my face." "And you find that amusing because?" "Because, my dear Havisham, it means the chase is on." "And I'll wager not an easy one at that." "So..." "The well-honoured tradition of "to the victor the spoils"..." "I intend to take her for everything." "Every penny." "(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)"