"And today we will also greet assumpció." "Assumpció, from badalona, has something very special to tell us." "Whenever you want." "When my husband died i met a gentleman but, as usual, when you're distracted they move in, bring their dirty clothes, and there you go." "I've already been through that." "I'm better off alone." "I go out when i want, no explanations." "And i don't believe i can't have a good time." "What do you mean?" "I don't follow." "I mean those things that vibrate." " Do you mean a dildo?" " No!" "You have tojiggle a dildo." "I mean those battery-powered things." "I'll show you." "You brought it?" "Sure, i never leave it home." "I always carry it." "Look how cute." "Look, look how pretty." "It's pretty, isn't it?" "Look how pretty it is." "Assumpció, what's that?" "I made a case to protect it." " Uncover it so we can see it." " No, i won't." "It would be like naked." "Well, she should show it, shouldn't she?" "Come on, come on!" "I won't show it, period." "That's it." "I won't, i won't." "Show it, show it!" "I won't show it, no, no and no." "While assumpció decides if she'll show it, a commercial break." "We'll be right back." "Thank you." "Afternoons with susanna" " hello?" " Begonya?" " Who is it?" " Susanna." "Susanna." " I want to ask you..." " that old lady makes me flip." "Is she an actress?" "No, she's genuine, really." "From badalona, how heavy!" "I'm in a hurry, we're on in a minute." "Can you ask pep anton for some orfidal?" "This is the last time, i swear." "Begonya?" "Son of a bitch!" "10 seconds and we're on." "Attention, 10 seconds to go." "A little silence." "We toyed with the peluchin for delicate clothes concept." "We studied the target and think the campaign should promote ultra mildness." "We think the peluchin concept is worn out." "Well, the concept... the bear is worn out." "Well, the bear's not... the bear is just fine and has become a symbol in the world of advertising." "We agree up to there." "But is it still valid?" "Can we load it down with more than one product?" "We don't think so." "Maybe." "It wouldn't be our first mistake." "What's important here is the feedback." "Anyway, this is my proposal." "Jesus, excuse me, you have a call." "I can't now." "It's your wife." "Urgent." "God damn her!" "Excuse me." "What's up?" " Hi, how are you?" " How am i?" "Shit, i'm at the peluchina presentation, i told you." "Well, i know, but we're having a romantic dinner at the giardinetto." "I've made the reservation." "Cuca." "Was it that urgent?" "I want to give you a surprise." "At 9." "Okay, okay, goodbye." "Holy shit!" "Jesus." "Holy shit, what a pain she is!" "What is it now?" " What's up, kid?" " Cristian?" "I'm just back from new york and got news." "This will change our lives." "What happened?" "Not over the phone." "I've got to see you." "When you get here, i'm in a mess with peluchin." "I'll tell you over dinner." " Today's impossible." " Why?" "What's wrong?" "A romantic dinner at the giardinetto." "Okay, where is it?" "I don't remember." "Not today." "We'll make it some other day, okay?" "Cristian, you hear?" "Cristian?" "I'm sorry, i saw you and i had a flash." "That's not normal." "Didn't you play volleyball with badalona once you went to cornella, against the salesian sisters?" " Sorry, that's not me." " No, wait a moment." "One moment." "Wait, you see... really, you look familiar, and i don't know where from." "Maybe we met, perhaps it was... thank you." "One moment." "I have a table." "Number 18." "Okay, thanks." "No?" "Well, okay, tell me." "Yeah, no, excuse me, you see i... what are you doing with that?" " The gentleman said you're 4." " We're 4?" "The hell with him." "What do i care?" "Excuse me." "Hey, what's up, hair ball?" "What's he doing here, jesus?" " I don't know, darling." " Somebody told him." "I just said i was having dinner with you." "You're incredible." "I call you for a romantic dinner because i have something important to say, i call giardinetto, reserve, and what do you do?" "You invite half the office." "Thanks, jesus." "Sorry." "That's it." "It's tato, he's in trouble again." "Susanna not here yet?" "Strange." "Makes no difference." "I'll go wash my hands." "You coming, jesus?" "What now?" "Jesus!" "You just went." "I did wash my hands, but now i have to take a piss." "If you take a piss, wash your hands." "Man, i have to tell you something." "Do you remember that american from pepsi who last year ordered a campaign for mirinda, but it fell through?" "Yeah, john mitchum." "This coke is good shit." "Remember i mentioned him?" " Like robert mitchum." " What are you doing?" "There's hardly a line, but it's great." "Half does the trick." "We're in public." "Anyone can walk in!" " Who can walk in?" " Who?" "This is a toilet!" "Well, as it turns out, now he's the marketing manager." "Last night, dining at the river cafe, he asked if i had ever planned on setting up my own agency." "I saw him coming." "He wanted to hire me." "Those people can't cope." "They need people." "The yanks may be childish, but when it comes to work... i love the way they work." "I love it." "That's cool, man!" "Then he said he wants to see me in fifteen days." "Cool!" "What are you going to do?" "Shit, it's what we've been waiting for:" "Set up our own agency and start to work for mitchum." "I'm desperate." "I can't sleep." "The peluchin guys don't like it." "They don't value your talent." "Hold this." "What's this?" "They want woman's lingerie, i devise peluchina, they say there's sexual nuances." "Of course there are." "Doesn't lingerie have them?" "See if you find some paper, i've run out." "And i had a great slogan." "But, no." "They want:" "Peluchin, for kids and cherubs."" "That's a poof." "But, anyway." "Shit, mitchum's wife looks just like your sister." "An ass like a bullring." "You listening?" "What's she done to you?" "I love fat asses." "If we set up the agency, peluchin can go take a shit." "You were serious?" "Sure!" "We've always wanted to." "Well, but only when we're drunk." " Things said, but never done." " Excuses, jesus." "Yes, excuses." "Will mitchum hire you?" "If he's sizing me up, it's for a reason." "This is very important." "What did he say exactly?" " Would you like something else?" " No, thank you." "Is that for sure?" "When someone says something like that, you must act fast." "I'm not so sure." "Fuck, not so sure!" "You'll write slogans for franquesa all your life?" "Besides, i'm constituting the company on wednesday." " We have to go." " On wednesday?" "I can't, i have a dentist appointment." " You have what?" " Two caries." "Yeah, two." "And they hurt." "I've cancelled 3 times." "Impossible." "I'll see mitchum in fifteen days." "So we set the company up on wednesday." "I'm doing you a favour." "Is that for sure?" "If it's not, i won't tell begonya." "Now i get it, man." "You should have told me." " What?" " Your wife scares you." " No she doesn't." " No?" "You're shitless." " What?" " Go on, do a line, man." " Jesus!" " Holy shit!" "Either you come out now, or i'm leaving!" "Okay, just a moment." "Hi, begonya." "Listen, a pipe has busted and we're waiting for the plumber." " All clear." " Fuck, what a scare!" " Shit!" " Holy shit, but... sorry." "Begonya!" "God damn it!" "Go take a shit, man." "Keep it up, keep it up!" "Fuck!" "Taxi!" "Begonya!" "Begonya!" "Darling, what's the matter?" " You idiot." " Fuck, come on." "Please, let's talk a moment." "Let's talk." "Begonya!" "Begonya!" "Stop, damn it!" " Thanks." " Good night." "Where are you going?" " Hey, love." " Hi, darling." " Where are they going?" " Begonya is hysterical." " What about dinner?" " Just you and me." "Better." "It'll be a romantic dinner." " How are you?" " Fine." "Darling, don't get mad." "We were coming out." "Begonya, i don't get it." "What's wrong?" "I'm sorry." "What have i done wrong?" "Fuck, come on, begonya." "I'm pregnant, jesus." "I bet you didn't expect me to be so handsome." "Remind you of anyone?" "But, what is this?" "What a dirty trick!" "I didn't expect it." " You did it." " Villazan did it." "Just one moment, please." "I don't like speeches, but the situation calls for one." "I remember when my daughter was born." "It was a premature birth." "My wife was 8 months." " On our way to the..." " mr." "Franquesa, a call." "Excuse me a moment." "What is it?" "What is it?" "Thanks, montse, you shouldn't have." "It's for jesus." "Montse." "Montse!" "Begonya." "Congratulations, i've heard you're pregnant." "Just a second." "Yeah... well, congratulations." "Thanks." " Black?" " Yeah, yeah." " A girlfriend of mitchum's." " A black!" "And what a body." "An athlete, man." "While i fucked her i thought:" ""Jesus won't believe it."" "What tits!" "What flexibility!" " What sexual appetite!" " What did you do to her?" "Did you do, you know?" "Something you would find arousing..." " i stuck my finger up her ass." " Shit, a finger up her ass." "Yeah, well, by the way, and following your story, the other day begonya almost caught me jerking off in bed." " What story do you mean?" " Yeah, man." "I got home drunk after josep mª's party." "I kept to one side so she wouldn't notice." "But you get to pass." "Let her notice, but i've got to come." "How couldn't i notice?" "The bed shakes!" "He gets home at four a.m., drunk, and spends 2 hours working at it." "But he was so stoned, there was no way he could come." "Finally, i turned the light on and said: "well?"" " But you didn't do anything." " No, he stunk of alcohol." "Because, lately, how are things?" "Well, i mean..." " is everything okay with you?" " Yeah, yeah." "Why?" "No..." " what's the matter?" " No, no." "Well, somebody saw you two last thursday night." "Saw who?" "You and pep anton." "Oh, yeah, we had the late shift and went out for a drink." "Oh, sure, sure." "What do you mean?" "We broke off 3 months ago." "That's over, okay?" "I made a decision, and when i do, i do." " Fuck!" " Wait, wait." "Fuck me." "The biggest embarrassment of my life." "I can't believe it." "You got caught?" "Oh, no, no." "But almost!" "Hello." " Where do you want this?" " Right there." "Thanks." " Thanks." " Thanks." "Fuck, susanna!" "I got stuck on him, but that's over." "And i repeat it:" "That's finished." " Why'd you give in again?" " He's great, but it's over." "To me it was, and is all quite clear." "I'm keen on him." "I was." "Yeah, sure." "And you're expecting jesus' child." "What's with you?" "You're stuck on him." "How do you know who i'm stuck on?" "You're right, no even you know that." "Okay, cut it out." "Shit, you're incredible." "You butt into everybody's life." "Okay." "Why don't i mind my own business?" "You've got your own problems." "Sorry?" "Your whore-loving boyfriend who's fucked half barcelona, and still ongoing." "While i was talking to the black broad, who had it shaved..." "forget that." "I feel somebody's starting to suck me off." "Mitchum." "Don't be an asshole!" "Her roommate." " Roommate?" " One that was there." "She saw us fuck and got horny." "That's normal in new york." "Many broads are like that." "She had squatted down and was giving me a blowjob." "Then i though of you." "I thought:" "Be strong and don't tell jesus." "I know it's not fair, but i can't help it." "I'm fucking and telling you." "What a blowjob, man!" "Fucking is so cool." "You should fuck more often." "Man, cut it out." "What's wrong?" "I'm here, doing my thing, my life, with my wanks like normal people and you with stories, fucking a black, her friend, a finger up her ass." "What do i care about asses, blowjobs and girlfriends?" "Fuck, man, but don't tell me more." " We always do this." " But that's not normal, man." "We don't have to tell everything." "We must learn not to, make an effort." "Study." "And i shouldn't ask you." "Because, well, these things, you know, sort of knock me off balance, they distract me." " Where are you going?" " To piss." "I'll have another, man." "You could have a fuckin' great show in madrid and you're doubtful because of cristian." " No, i've decided not to go." " Not to go?" "I'm fine right here." "I've got a good crew..." " excuses!" " I've got a good crew." "Don't be silly!" "A nationwide program on prime time." "I'm at an age where i put things into perspective." "I like my profession, but i like my partner more." "Besides, i feel like having a child." " With cristian?" " No, with my grandmother." "I don't think he does." "He never talks about that." " I can't see you having his baby." " Girl, what's with you?" "I may never have a child with cristian but at least i know who i want to have one with." " One last line and i'll go." " No way, man, no." "I'll give begonya a kiss and go." "Sure, you asshole." "Go take a shit!" "Shit!" "Never again, man." "That bastard is flying high." "Tomorrow i'll get my balls cut off." "I feel pretty bad." "Shit, i look terrible." "Once the baby is born, this is over." "What are you doing?" " You still like that?" " Yeah." "So?" "We'll be late." "Get dressed." " I think i've had an idea?" " What?" " You'll see." " No." " Yes, 5 minutes." " No." " Just 5 minutes." " No, this... cristian, drive carefully or i'll swallow my lipstick." "Look at the time?" "Our hysterical begonya has probably call the hospitals." "Yes." "Hand me the phone." "I'll call her." "No, i didn't bring it." " You didn't bring it?" " I didn't bring it." "So?" "Won't you have a fit of anxiety without your phone?" "From now on i pass on my cell phone." "I won't even take it to work." "With my cell phone i'm up to... don't look at me like that, i know you." "What balls!" "It's gotten baggy again." " It's not the shirt." " I don't like it." "I'll fix it for you." " It's about time." " We almost didn't make it." " What's up, people?" " Jesus, darling... come here, daddy." "We'll be downstairs." " That's a cute dress." " Really?" "I hadn't seen it." " What's this?" " He's having a bad day." " Let's walk." " Yeah, take the stairs." " Where's your cell phone?" " What?" "I gave a broad your number to go out tonight." "My number?" "Why?" "The stewardess at the airport." "We have a date." "What's my phone got to do with it?" "I don't want susanna to suspect." "Suspect what?" "Oh, that you want to fuck her." "She'll call and say:" ""This is eduard."" "The password." "You say: "eduard, how nice to hear you." "Where are you?" She'll tell you where." "Then you'll tell me you'll be seeing eduard." " And i'll tag along." " Who is eduard?" "Gimenez!" "The guy who used to break-dance." " But that guy drowned." " So what if he did?" " They won't know." " What's up?" " Hey, cristian!" " Jesus." "Move." "Darling, i'll be right down." "Where's the elevator?" "We had a problem." "I'm going down." "Does that eduard know the password?" " Isn't eduard dead?" " Yes, what a shame, poor guy." "We'll go to the party relaxed, and you do your strategy." "You'll be relaxed, idiot." "Besides, i didn't bring my phone." " What took you so long?" " We'll be late." " Did you get stuck?" " These old elevators." "Is it coming?" "Why does franquesa throw parties every 15 days?" " He has no family?" " Him?" "As if he didn't." "One daughter's in the usa, the other with her mother." "With her mother?" "I can't believe you don't know they're separated." "From his wife?" "Jesus, you never tell me anything." " I thought i had told you." " A few months ago." "She caught him fucking with the babysitter." "No!" "What a pig!" "If your mother gets run over, no one can let you know." "He didn't bring his phone!" "No one in the xxi century can get by without a cell phone." "You still use messenger pigeons?" " You forgot it as well." " Don't change the subject." "I just left it." "He forgot it." "It's not the same thing." "It's not the same." "I didn't feel like bringing it." "I've got your phone in my handbag." "Plus your keys and wallet." "You forget everything." "Luckily, you've got begonya." " Well, cristian the great!" " Your majesty!" " Frankie!" " Hi, beautiful." " Hi." " How are you?" " Do you remember begonya?" " For 7 years now!" " Hi." " Hi, franquesa, how are you?" " Your coats, please." " Yes, here." "Here, thank you." "Before you leave, resolve the peluchin matter." "Don't leave me in the lurch." "Excuse me." "See you, franquesa." "He wants me to work now?" " What are you having?" " I'll have a manhattan." " Juice." "Or water." " Well, i'll have whiskey." "Shit!" " What?" " Take it easy, i'll be right down." " You bastard!" " Jesus!" " It's mine!" " Jesus!" " Jesus!" " Don't follow me." " Give me the bag." " I don't want to." "Jesus!" "I can't be at the party knowing it'll ring." " I'll have a fit." " Give me." "How can you do that to susanna?" "Gojerk off!" "Why should i?" "I already do." "I wouldn't do this to begonya." "We're together 12 years and i've never cheated." "First i'd masturbate." "And i do that a lot." "I've always masturbated a lot, but alone." "And think about begonya." "Come on, man!" "After so many years?" "At the end." "Before that i think about other things." " Things i tell you about." " But with begonya's face." "Sometimes i finish with her face too." " You're a bastard." " Jesus!" "Open the door!" "You son of a bitch!" " You're going too far, jesus!" " Sorry, cheating like that is wrong." "You hurt your wife by masturbating as much as i do fucking and using my finger." " It's the same." " How can you cheat on her and be so calm?" "You're a monster." "Shit, shit!" "Let me go!" "Shit, let me go!" "What's with my bag?" "I wanted to get some candy from your bag and jesus won't let me." "Since when do i have candy in my bag?" "You have none?" "Why'd you tell me she did then?" " I didn't say that." " You don't look like you would." " You're making it up." " What?" "Shit, no, no, no, no!" " I'll answer." " What's going on?" "Well, eduard, how nice to hear from you." "Tell me." " Who was it, cuqui?" " No one, cuca, no one." " No one?" "Who was it?" " Eduard gimenez." "Remember him?" "He wants to see me." " What eduard gimenez?" " Well, eduard gimenez." "It's been so long." "I was thinking: "how's eduard?"" "I was about to call him, almost." "You'll go have a drink?" "Shit, i'd like to go too." "But i can't, i have to get up early." "Don't worry, i told him i couldn't go." "What?" "You'll stand eduard gimenez up?" "You haven't seen each other in ages." "He calls you up." "Man, that's eduard gimenez!" " Who the fuck is eduard?" " A friend of cristian's from the faculty." "A very intelligent guy." "What a shame." "Why "what a shame"?" "Because... because... because, you know." "He's rather short, he never grew in height." "Didn't grow." "That sounds familiar." "Didn't he die?" "How could he die!" "Jesus, call him." " Why call him?" " You call him." " Jesus, what's going on?" " Jesus!" "Well, what the fuck, do i call him or not?" "Begonya, i'll call him just to say no, in case he took it badly, poor guy." "Where's he going to talk to him?" "He's acting weird." "What if he has a lover, cuca?" "Sorry." "Well, that's done." "Well, let's see." "He's at the bikini, and invites us over." "No commitment, he's not expecting us, but he's there." "Okay, we can go for a while, a little later." " The four of us." " Let's go now, this is a drag." "Just a moment." "Eduard said just you and me." "No girls." "A meeting with the guys." "In that sense i... a meeting with the guys?" "To play table football?" "The typical misogynistic homosexual who can't stand broads." " Who's homosexual?" " Edu." "You didn't know?" " So you're going to a gay bar?" " How can you think that...?" "Do you have to be queer to go to a gay bar, begonya?" "What a bummer you won't come." "We'd have a great time." "No one said we won't." " Then, come on." " No, edu is very strict on that." "Shit, he's invited us and..." " what's with you and edu?" " Yeah, what's with you two?" " I hope you're not..." " i won't go." " And next time you want..." " i want?" "Next time edu wants to see me and you want to come too, don't count on me." "Fuck this shit!" "Excuse me a moment, please." "I know at my last party i promised not to give more speeches and i won't." "A toast to cristian, who's leaving." "I taught him all he knows, and he sets up his own agency." "But i'm happy, and drink to his health." "And to jesus', who's going with him." "Another bastard." "Here's up their ass." "Cheers!" " Cheers!" " Thank you." "Congratulations!" "Where are you going?" "What's wrong?" "You ask what's wrong?" "You quit and i find out at this shitty party." "And you've got the balls to ask?" "I haven't quit." "Cristian's gone crazy." " What does franquesa say?" " I don't know." " Where are you going?" " What's with you, asshole?" " What?" " You handed in my resignation!" " Just a moment." " No." "Tell him i'm not leaving." " Hadn't he agreed?" " We've said so all our lives." "He's not setting the agency up with you." " Why not, begonya?" " Cause i don't feel like it." "You don't feel like it?" "That's normal, they're pregnant." "She's the one who's pregnant." " It's their lives, they decide." " Just a moment." " What the fuck is this?" " What the fuck are you saying?" "I don't know why we should miss out on our only chance because you want to play house." " That's what i say." " You're going too far." " You're ajerk." " Let him decide." " You want a baby?" " Forget me." "It's no time to set up a company." " Is it to have a baby?" " What?" "Have an abortion!" "First things first." "What a hurry to have kids?" "What?" "All you think about is having kids, shit!" " I want kids, someday." " Don't change the subject." "I want to go to nepal but don't make my bags." " What do you mean?" " I'm fed up!" "We complicate your lives!" "Bitter people." "Nothing new occurs to us?" "No imagination?" "We don't fuck like before?" "Besides bitter, mediocre." "Go to a psychiatrist and leave children alone, please." "You're covering gaps with kids, shit!" "You keep on patching things up." "Don't stop!" "Aren't you going into the garage?" "I think i'm going to have a drink with edu, darling." "Let's go to bed." "It's very late to have a drink." "Darling, i'll be back to sleep." "First i'll have a drink with edu." "Everything can be done." "What's the problem?" "Okay." " I'm going to bed." " Okay." "Are you coming, or not?" "No, i've got to see ed." "Jesus!" "What shitty diapers did you buy?" "I asked you for diapers for a 6-month old." "These diapers are enormous!" "A rickety baby who hardly weighs 13 pounds." "Amazing!" "What do i do with these diapers, wrap him up?" "Okay, okay, begonya." "To hell with it, to hell!" "Mama's coming, darling." "Fuck the train!" "We're liable to break our necks." "What's that train doing here?" "Jesus, will you get the fuck up?" "The baby's breakfast has to be made, and i'm late." " Shit, just 5 minutes, begonya." " No shit, i'm going." "The stove's on and the baby, loose." "Move." "Fuckin' shit, let's not get up like this." "Please!" "Please fasten your seatbelts." "We are about to land." "Thank you." "May i have your cup?" "Thank you." "May i have your cup?" "Excuse me." "Your cup?" "I'm sorry." "Thank you." " Jesus!" "Still!" " I'm getting up." "You've got balls!" "Do as you damn please, but hear this:" "He's got a fever." " You heard. 36.9." " 36.9?" " Last night he was at 36.8." " Now he's at 36.9." "Shit!" "I knew it!" "I knew it!" "Why me?" "Why me?" " Couldn't he stay at 36.8?" " Don't worry, it's okay." " It's not that high." " It is!" "No one goes to 36.9!" " What's it from?" " How do i know?" " He's got it, that's all." " His stomach's full of mucus." "That's why he vomited." "If you had them, you would." " I don't know." " For sure." "I know you." "I can't stand the baby having fever." "I can't." "Here she is!" "Just once:" "I'm tired and we have an appointment." "This isn't the right time." "Let's be good." "Just one question." "Is it true you're planning to get married?" "Where did you get that information?" "Brendan has his divorce papers from mari t." "No comment." "We're in a hurry." "Ask mari t, okay?" "Is it true that in barcelona you'll have your breasts done?" "Is it true that you have your mouth closed for good, dear?" " When is the wedding?" " There is no wedding." " What about your crisis?" " Watch the mike, you'll hurt me." "I told your colleague." "I'll talk at the right time, not now." "I'm here to work." "If you respect me, i'll respect you." " What are you doing?" " Getting dressed." " Why?" "Are you leaving?" " No, i'm dressing to stay." "Cristian." " Will you call me?" " Sure i will." "Slam the door shut when you leave." "The maid will be here in half an hour." "You'd better not be here, okay?" "Bye." " Hi, montse." "Where's gloria?" " Waiting for you in there." "Let's see... you shouldn't run in hospitals." "Fernando, shit, man!" "Oh, my god!" " Dr. Bonet?" " He's off today." "Sorry." "I'm sorry, gloria." "Sorry, i know i'm late." " With the christening..." " no excuses!" " The same story." " Sorry," " it's the last time." " I don't care." "I'll talk to gimeno, you work it out." "Gloria!" "Pretty little hands, pretty... excuse me." "Has susanna blanc left?" " A while ago." " Where to?" "She has a press conference at 1 at fnac." "Try there." "Thanks." "Let's see." "Ah... i insist on what i said before." "It's an absolutely personal book that tries to avoid media books we've already seen and know." "And i sincerely think that i achieved that." "It's a book written in first person, right from my genes." "I would even say that there is a before and after "susanna determined"." "In it i talk about television but from a new point of view, throwing some light on what would be... on what would be... as a woman." "I'll never lose that." "My condition as a woman, now and in this book, has been indispensable." " Yes?" " Cristian, darling." "Just a moment." "I'm... wait, wait just a moment." "Sorry, i got lost." "Where was i?" "Yes, yes." "In a world absolutely dominated by men." "I'll pick it up tomorrow." "I promise." "But i was at a meeting all morning, and you know how that is." " Today is saturday." " Yes." "It's a saturday meeting." "You see, i went by the agency and..." " but i need that dress today." " Today?" "Yes." "Don't tell me you had forgotten." "No, no." "What do you mean?" "How could i forget?" "But i'm having a complicated day." "Don't stand me up, i know no one." "What?" "Of course not." "But i can't pick you up." " Let's meet there." " And the dress?" "Cristian?" "Wait just a moment!" "Just a moment!" "Please, it's mine." "Do me a favour." "You bastard!" "Son of a bitch!" "Jesus, i'm home." "I'll change in 2 minutes and we go." "Gimeno gave me a cockeyed story to say... jesus, jesus, where are you?" "Hi, darling." "Jesus!" "Darling, come here." "Jesus!" "Jesus!" " Jesus, answer me!" " I'm up here." "Mama will be right there." "Jesus!" "Jesus!" " Jesus!" " In the bathroom!" " What are you doing?" " I'm taking a shit." "You know the time?" "We have to get to church." "I can never count on you." "Never!" "I'm finished, darling." " You're still in your pyjamas?" " That's the way it's gone." "At least the baby has eaten." "He has eaten, right?" "Fuck, begonya, of course he's eaten." " What has he eaten?" " I don't know." "Things." "Things?" "What things, jesus?" " Things from the icebox." " God damn you, he hasn't eaten!" " He hasn't eaten!" " Give him ajar." "Another one?" "He had one for breakfast." " I'll make him purée." " No, no, no." "I'll give him ajar." " And go get dressed!" " Fuck, begonya." "I'm in a hurry, remember." "Thanks." "The other lane is empty." "Empty?" "That's empty?" "You want me to fly?" "What is the taxi lane for?" "To get behind a bus, of course." "This is incredible!" "I knew it." " Fuck, the light was yellow!" " So what?" "On yellow you can accelerate!" "Are you ajerk, or what?" "We'd gain nothing by jumping it." " Hello?" " Jesus, it's me." " Where are you?" " Listen, let's see." "Man, i don't think i'll make the christening." "What?" "Everyone's expecting you." "What can i say?" "My car was towed away." "But you're the godfather." " I know i promised." " What a shame, man." " Do you know who's come?" " Who's gone?" " Take a guess." " I'm in no mood for guessing." "Susanna." "From madrid, expressly." "We're very happy." "Susanna?" "Jesus, i'll be there." "I'll be there in 5 minutes." " Don't take long." " No, i won't." "Okay, i'll see you." "I told you." "How come you're so late?" "I'm lucky to be here." " They've begun." "You weren't..." " come on, let's go." "Cristian!" "Cristian, wait!" "Well then, do you reject satan, prince of evil?" "Yes, we do." "Do you reject his ostentation and glories in this world?" "Just a moment, please." "Excuse me." "Sorry, sit down." "I'm the godfather." "Sit down." " Sorry." " I thought you'd never make it." "How could i miss pau's christening?" "Who is pau?" "Shit, pau, the baby!" "Right, it's a girl, paula." "Why did i call her pau?" "Isn't it pol?" "Pol, pol, right!" "I knew it was a boy." "I did." "Come, darling." "Pol, i baptize you in the name of the father," "and of the son and of the holy ghost." "I know he's hungry... everyone, let's concentrate." "This is for life." " Smile." " Luis!" "Thank you." " Let me hold him." " No, no." "It's grandmother's turn." "Look, pol, a cake with your name on it." "Your name." "P-o-l." "Pol." "Let me have the baby." "I'll show susanna." "Don't get upset, i'll be right back." "Don't get upset." "Look at pol." "Look at him." "Susanna, darling, do you want to hold him?" "No, thanks, no." "I'm having a whiskey." "Give him to me, he won't cry." "He must be thirsty, or hungry." "He has a blister on his backside." "If it's irritated, talcum powder, shit." "Those two seem like jerks." "You're hassling him." "What the fuck's wrong?" "He never cries." " He has a fever." " Fever?" "Give him half an aspirin." " No, not aspirin." " Whatever you want, apiretal." "Hey, susanna." "I didn't know you were in barcelona." " No?" " No." " Well, i am." " Yeah, so i see." "Brendan, this is cristian." "Brendan." " Hello." " How are you?" "Fine, thanks." "Ah, yes, veronica." " Susanna is a..." " yes, i know who she is." "I never miss your shows." "You're the best." "Thanks, darling." "In madrid, is your show going okay?" "I admit i don't see much tv." " Yeah?" " Yeah, yeah." "The new company busts my ass." "It's doing great." "Full steam." "But i bust my ass." "How's everything going, guys?" " Fine, thanks." " Okay?" "The food is great." "You look cute with that hairdo." "I decided to wear it short." "With the baby, jesus has to cut my hair." "Short and clean." "Well, what now, a baby girl?" "No, no." "From the very beginning we knew we wanted only one." "Yeah?" "Why?" "So he'll lack nothing." "He'll lack a brother." "Last week jesus had a vasectomy." "That's it, he's out cold, sleeping like a log." "Begonya said you had a vasectomy." "Yes, last wednesday." " I wasn't too sure at first." " Right." "And you are now?" "Now?" "Now it's quite clear to me." " What were you saying?" " No, nothing." "I was talking about vasectomy." " No, susanna, you were saying..." " no, nothing." "Susanna, you were." "You were saying... well, maybe i was." "What was i saying?" " You hear the baby?" " What's wrong now?" " You didn't tell him a story!" " Today as well?" "Every day, jesus, every day." " You go, today's your turn." " It's his christening party!" "The baby's not to blame." "The 7 goats and the wolf, the longest." " Jesus!" " Son of a bitch!" "We tell him a story every day, or he won't sleep." "He doesn't like toys, but loves stories." "He'll like to read." "I don't know the 7 goats and the wolf." "The wolf fakes being mama goat... and sticks its paw in flour." "The flour one, sure, man." "Let's get to the point." "What a fuckin' pain!" "Once upon a time, there was a mama goat who lived happily with her seven kids." "You don't even know what a kid is." "One day, when leaving home, she said:" "Be good." "If anyone knocks, don't open the door." "The assholes opened and were gobbled up." "The wolf had gone to the little goats' house... listen, listen, as i was saying," "now that i know what it's like to give birth, if i couldn't give birth, now that i know... i mean, i'd die." "That s.o.b. Thinks i'm an idiot." "He leaves out the part when the wolf drools." " What?" " Nothing, jesus is ajerk." "Having hurt his pride, he goes and steals two eggs to clear his voice, and knocks." "As i was saying, susanna, to know there is human life within you is... what a bastard!" "He left out the part about the black paw." "The most important." "Excuse me." "Jesus!" " Jesus!" " What the fuck?" "He was ready!" "If you don't want to tell it, okay." "If the kids don't see the black paw first, and the wolf shows the white one without using flour, this child will think wolves have white paws." " So what?" "He's 6-months old." " Yes, just 6." "Pol won't learn to talk, nor structure sentences." "He'll be so confused he'll have to recuperate." " Darling, you're exaggerating." " Sure, exaggerating, but pol thinks wolves have white paws." "I'll tell him now!" "My dear boy, all fuckin' wolves have fuckin' black paws!" "That's it!" "Get the fuck away!" "Don't cry, baby." "Now mama'll explain the part daddy left out." "At times daddy is in a hurry to be with his friends instead of with his... how's it going?" "Why are you all so quiet?" "Come on, friends, music!" "Liven up, life is short." " A story every day?" " From the first day." "Our paediatrician said that in the first 6 months they learn 75% of... what did he say?" "What they don't learn then, they'll never learn." " Are you sure you got it right?" " Perfectly." "I'm sorry, but pol is a bit nervous." "Let's keep the volume down." "Thanks." "How is my treasure?" "Journalism has changed a lot." " What year are you in?" " First." "I wonder." "No, can't be." "Who's your sound man?" " Aguirre." " Holy shit, aguirre." " You know him?" " More or less, yes." "Shit, well then..." "this is heavy." "He's having an affair with a first-year student." " But aguirre's elderly." " Well, he's over 50." "Yeah, and over 60 too." "But he had a..." " he had a..." " he's not my type." " How old is the girl?" " 19." "He must be in shape." "He loves women." "And if they're 19, that's it." "I'm sorry, i just got a flash of him." " How's it going with cristian?" " Fine." "Very well." " Can i ask you something?" " Sure, ask." "Why did you and cristian break off?" "I'm in a more relaxed, more mature stage." "You know, when in your life you go...?" "I mean, you notice, you notice you're... i'm getting to know myself." "And i'm still in the process." "For example, when i'd think about having children, i'd... but now, i think about that subject." "A subject that..." " let's dance." " Sorry?" " When we broke off..." " when i broke off, you mean." "Yes, well, when you broke off." "I broke off too." "We both did, okay?" "At that time, when we broke off, i wanted things to happen to me." "I wanted to be open, not to clam up." " You wanted to fuck." " To fuck?" "Yes, fuck other broads." "Yeah, okay." "But it wasn't just that." "I was..." "i wasn't pleased with myself." "I was having a fierce internal battle." "It was a time when many things were happening to me and i had to live them, see what happened." "So what happened?" " Fuck, baby, you're a real hunk!" " What?" "Cristian's a real bastard." "A fuckin' lucky guy!" "What is this?" "Don't worry, i'm castrated." "Nothing can happen." "Listen!" "Come here, woman." " Did you get sugared almonds?" " Yeah." "You got it made, fucking that 18-year old with those tits... you fuck her ass, you prick?" "Susanna, susanna, susanna, i need to talk to you." "Fuck, just a minute, a second." "What?" "What are you doing?" " You're wrong about brendan." " Let me go." "Since you left i've thought a lot and i want to be with you." "I need to." "I love you, can't you see?" " Yeah?" " Yeah." "And what about that 19-year old?" "Veronica?" "Forget her." "Veronica's over, i swear." "You're so shoddy!" "No problem." "You want children?" "Let's have them." " Really, i want children." " You've knocked veronica up." "Who told you?" "Who else could tell me?" "I'll talk to her." "She'll abort." "I'll get that bitch to abort." " You and i'll have a baby." " With no womb, that's difficult." "What do you mean?" "My uterus was removed 6 months ago." "I was emptied." "I'm drier than the doñana reservoir." "I'm sorry." " I'm so sorry, susanna." " No, make no mistake." "I'm happy." "I, at least, have accepted my shit." "Veronica." "Veronica." "Veronica, open the door." "Come on, veronica." " Jesus." " Don't hassle me." " Jesus." " Leave me alone." "Listen to me." "You're making a fool of yourself." "Jesus, look at me." "The baby's crying." "Let's get him to a doctor." "You go." "Can't you see i'm dancing?" "Go take a shit!" " Don't forget anything." " I'm not, mama." "Tissues." "You get the baby." " And the thermometer?" " Yes." " They have at the hospital." " I'll take" " mine anyway." " What do i do?" "Get the baby, i told you before." "Here, a change of clothes." "Darling, come with mama." "Jesus." " Give me the baby." " No, no." "Don't hassle me, you bitch, you've ruined half my life." "Leave the baby alone!" "Leave the baby!" "He's my son!" "I'm his father and i take him to the hospital." "Think you're the perfect mother?" "Number one?" "Leave me alone." "Leave me alone." "Shit!" " Piece of shit!" " Son of a bitch!" "Ugly bitch!" "You've become ugly out of bitterness!" "You resentful bitch!" "Son of a bitch!" "Jesus!" "Get out of there, you asshole!" "Look at her, look at her!" "Bitch!" "Fuckin' bitch, that's my son!" "Jesus, what are you doing?" "Shut the fuck up!" "For god's sake, jesus!" "God damn you!" "What the fuck are you doing?" "I can't see!" "I'll kill her... jesus!" "Jesus, begonya!" "Jesus, begonya!"