"[BIRDS CHIRPING]" "So, are-- are you gay?" "[SNORT] What?" "Well, I mean, I never actually asked you." "Well, you know, I'm no gold star like you." "But let's put it this way." "A man would have to pay me a lot of money to have sex with me." "So wait, you are gay." "I am gay." "Good for me." "[KNOCKING]" "Oh, shh." "Fuck." "It's my dad." "Shh." "Don't move." "Dad, I'm busy." "Oh, you got company?" "Yes." "Is it Evan?" "No." "No." "Just go to work." "Oh, it's a new gal." "When do I get to meet her?" "Never if you keep this up." "Well, it's only polite for you to introduce me to your guest." "Dad." "Please go to work." "Please?" "Fine." "You win." "All right." "I love you, baby." "I love you too, Daddy." "Have fun." "OK." "Go, go, go, go." "OK." "I would like to continue kissing now." "Your dad sounds nice." "Yeah, well, if you're lucky, play your cards right, you might even meet him one day." "Mmm." "[GIGGLE]" "[MUSIC" " SICK OF SARAH, "OVEREXPOSURE"]" "THEME SONG:" "Run, run, run, run, run, run, run, run as fast as you can." "Tell me how low can you go, your in out of control and oh no, you're over exposed." "When now, overexposure now." "Overexposure now." "Overexposure." "Now." "Dan the man." "Hey, Trista." "So Susan says you're having a little trouble with the ladies." "I think I may be able to help you." "[MUSIC PLAYING]" "Pardon me." "Who are you?" "You must be Susan." "[LAUGHING]" "The man appears." "[CHUCKLE] Hello, you sexy thing." "Hi, Dan." "I do want to see you again." "Dan, who is this girl?" "I'm Avery." "Oh, you a saucy little minx." "What have you brought into to my home?" "Is this woman a-- is she a whore?" "And that's the magic word." "You know what, Susan?" "Your husband has a huge cock." "I mean, huge." "Believe me, I've seen a few." "I think the problem might be that you're just a little too old and shriveled up to take him." "Something to think about." "Cheers." "[GROAN] Susan, you cannot go around calling people names." "What the hell is wrong with you?" "That's domestic abuse." "We all miss her." "Especially the way she left without saying goodbye." "That doesn't mean we love her any less." "What's the matter?" "Do you blame yourself for what she did?" "[SOBBING]" "We're all hurting." "Don't you go feeling sorry for yourself." "Is that what it is, Susan?" "You blame yourself for what she did?" "I do." "I wasn't a good mother." "Yes, you were." "I am not going to go throw a pity party for myself." "And I sure as hell is not gonna throw one for you." "Damn it." "I drove her away." "[SOBBING] I drove her" "I drove her." "[MUSIC" " VANITY THEFT, "END SCENE"]" "Hey." "Whatcha doing?" "I'm, uh, walking home." "Yeah?" "Do you want a ride?" "[DINGING]" "I, uh-- [CHUCKLE] I wanted to apologize for having an intimate encounter on your couch." "It-- it was rude, and I should've asked." "No, it's-- it's cool." "I think, uh, you owe me an apology, too." "I'm not good at those." "Yeah, I, uh" "[LAUGH] I gathered as much." "But you could give it a whirl." "Uh, I was a dick that night I saw you at the Pussy Cat lounge." "And [SIGH] sorry." "Good girl." "See?" "That wasn't so bad." "I guess not." "Well, this has been fun." "We should do it again sometime." "Yeah." "I'll see you around." "OK." "[DINGING]" "[MUSIC" " VANITY THEFT, "END SCENE"]" "Dad." "Yeah, it's me." "How are you?" "Where's everybody been?" "Oh." "Well, is Mom there?" "Can I talk to her?" "Did you tell her it was me?" "Right." "No, even if it was something I could change my mind about," "I wouldn't." "Right." "It's better this way." "[SIGH] That's what you keep saying." "OK." "Well, tell mom I love her." "I love you too, Dad." "Dad?" "Dad?" "[MUSIC PLAYING]" "She fucking threw a bread roll." "[LAUGHING]" "That's my Susie." "Yeah, she's a little psycho." "Poor choice in weaponry, too." "[LAUGHING]" "Who's that?" "That's Bender." "She's a romantic." "Oh." "How long has she been there?" "Yesterday?" "She showed up for a nap, and behold." "Hm." "She's kind of hot." "She needs to get laid." "I'd do her." "I'm not stopping you." "She's asleep." "So?" "You're terrible." "TRISTA: [CHUCKLING] Bender." "This is Avery." "She wants to fuck you." "Stop it." "[LAUGHING]" "She's leaving." "Eh." "You can't help those that don't want to be saved." "All right." "Well, thanks for the hook up and the, uh, bread roll." "My pleasure." "Love ya." "Is Bender here?" "No honey, but I can call her." "I don't know anyone else in Lexington." "Can you help me?" "Come in, come in." "Are you ever going to speak?" "It's known as Wu Wei, the ancient Taoist practice of actionless activity." "That's what you keep saying." "Evan, I try to put my patients' needs ahead of my own, but I don't know how much longer I can do this." "Susan wants me to be here." "Is that why you keep coming?" "Because of Susan?" "Every week I sit here with you in a state of intense presence." "You can do that at home." "Yes, but this way Susan's happy." "Could we at least play Checkers or Battleship?" "It's what I do with my child clients." "Something to pass the time." "Does my stillness frighten you?" "No." "It's boring." "I apologize." "I apologize." "I never meant to bore you." "Tell me what it was that I saw when I was dead." "My patients have either not remembered anything, or they describe the universal experience of the afterlife." "Afterlife?" "That sounds stupid." "Is that what happened to you when you were dead?" "You had an experience of the other realm?" "I did not see a tunnel of light and all my dead relatives." "But you did see something, didn't you?" "Only crazy people have visions." "I don't believe in that sort of thing." "What do you believe in?" "Causality, action, reaction, cause and effect." "So a very reality-based belief system." "So why do I remember something that wasn't real?" "You remember your dreams, don't you?" "Hm." "Interesting." "It was an eternal, all encompassing void, blackness." "Yet within that vast emptiness, lay all truth, all beauty." "And it was more real than you and I sitting here talking." "Do you want to go back?" "Yes." "Do you resent that you were brought back here?" "I want to be alive." "This is not abnormal, Evan." "People all over the world just like you have described a similar experience in the presence of death." "There's been what might be called a conspiracy in the scientific community to regard these experiences as insignificant." "Todd, no." "We're fucking about to have a breakthrough, and you want to, like, get all spiritual and shit." "And I mean, fuck that." "What I want is for you, as a professional, to tell me what I saw when I was dead." "The scientific explanation is that there are certain chemicals in the brain, which under certain conditions such as lack of oxygen or blood flow, can induce feelings similar to those described in a near death experience." "What you saw was the final battle cry of a dying brain." "What defines me most are the things I don't believe in." "What's the meaning of life?" "There's isn't one." "What is the purpose of life?" "To end." "That's nihilism." "No." "It's not." "Despite the ultimate meaninglessness of life, and the inevitability of death, I can see that a worthwhile life is possible." "How?" "Through constant overcoming." "I have to accept the fact that I'm ever going to be at home in this world or any other." "[SPITTING NOISE]" "[PHONE VIBRATING]" "[GROAN]" "Can I have some nuts?" "Yeah." "Help yourself." "Um, I'll clean that shit up later, all right?" "WOMAN: [SHRIEK] What was that?" "That's Bender." "What's a Bender?" "Imagine a miniature Evan with a human soul." "Ling, you're 17." "You could have said something." "No, I couldn't." "I thought I could make it in the city." "Get a job, get an apartment." "But I was wrong." "It's not as easy as it sounds." "All the money I took with me is gone." "I can't put any gas in my car." "That's why I came here." "I thought that maybe I could work for you and you could give me a little money." "Honey, don't worry about that." "We'll make sure you're taken care of." "Did your parents kick you out because you're gay?" "Because I refused to lie and say I wasn't." "I told my friend, my best friend, that I'm a lesbian." "And she was so sweet about it." "I felt safe." "But then she told the whole school, which I guess is OK, but it got back to my parents." "And they wanted me to say that I wasn't, but of course, I couldn't do that." "So they decided to send me to a camp to correct gay teenagers." "Do they know what happens at those camps?" "They attach electrodes to your genitalia and make you look at pictures of naked women as they shock you." "Oh, that can't be true." "You had no choice, then." "You had to run away." "Oh, sure I did." "I could have said I was straight." "My parents, despite their flaws, instilled in me a sense of ethics, of right and wrong, of being true to oneself." "I would rather starve than lie about who I am." "I think I know someone that could help." "[SOBBING]" "[RETCHING]" "Honey?" "[COUGHING]" "Honey." "[SOBBING]" "I can't keep anything down." "Oh, what?" "The painkillers?" "Honey, you just gotta eat something." "I can't keep anything down, Dad." "Well, then you just have to inhale it, all right?" "I'll get everything set up." "You go get into bed and I'll bring it to you." "OK?" "[SOBBING] I just want to be normal, Dad." "Shh." "It's going to be OK." "[SOBBING]" "[MOANING]" "Your tits." "Oh, I could die in your tits." "[MOANING]" "Am-- am I your girlfriend?" "Hm?" "We've never talked about it." "OK." "Let's talk about it." "I never brought it up because I thought you might not like it." "Look, I know that you're a ni-hil or nigh-hil-, or whatever, but I got a book and I tried to read about it." "I don't understand it." "I assume that you don't believe in relationships either." "And look, you know everything about me." "And I know nothing about you." "You're the most compassionate person" "I've ever met, Trista Bennett." "I don't think you understand how lovely you are to me." "You think I'm pretty?" "Is that a joke?" "Oh, my god." "How can ask me that?" "You're so beautiful." "Thank you." "Oh, my god." "Baby." "So am I your girlfriend?" "Yeah." "[DOORBELL]" "She's 17?" "Shit, Bender, I'm impressed." "Dude." "I could have gone to jail, man." "It's totally OK." "As long as she's 16, it's totally legal." "I didn't sleep with her." "I mean, I" " I tried, but I failed." "Why can't she stay with you?" "I have a roommate." "You have a guest room." "She can't use that." "You know what's in there." "Let her sleep on your fucking couch, then." "Look, I'm not ready to be come a father." "Neither am I." "I'm more ill-equipped than you." "Dude, I have to take care of Mimi." "Trust me." "I got a lot-- a lot of shit going on, OK?" "Like, uh-- like, uh, I had a very intense therapy session today, and um, I'm heart broken over a dead girl." "And now I've got to keep her mom from going crazy." "I'm being sued for wrongful death, and that doesn't even begin to delve into my personal issues, my sexual intimacy dating issues, and what have you, and" "You're seeing a therapist?" "[SIGH] Yeah." "BENDER:" "Look, cut me some slack, man." "Don't make me beg." "EVAN:" "You already are." "You can't, man." "There's no fucking way." "OK, fine." "But you're babysitting." "[PIANO PLAYING]" "I cannot believe you let Bender talk you into that." "She is single-handedly the most annoying person I've ever met." "She has a crush on you." "Well, you need to tell her to back off." "Besides, what's with this girl you-- letting her move in and stuff?" "I mean, I thought you weren't into sleepovers." "Well, that rule doesn't apply if I'm not actually having sex with the girl." "[CHUCKLE] I miss this." "What do you mean?" "MAXINE:" "Us." "I miss us." "Yeah?" "MAXINE:" "Yeah." "MAN:" "I want that fucking money right now, man." "MELVIN:" "I don't have it." "I'm sorry." "Get your fucking hands off me!" "[SCREAMING]" "No, I got it right here." "I'm paying." "Evan." "No, no, no." "Evan, I'm going to call the police." "Evan, no!" "[SHOUTING]" "Right now." "Right now." "Hey, asshole." "Bitch, what the fuck you" "[GROAN]" "[GASP]" "Thank you!" "[MUSIC PLAYING]" "Wake up, sleepy head." "Oh, shit." "[CHUCKLING]" "Hey, I see you made your bed." "It looks really comfortable." "You don't have to babysit me." "I'm fine." "No, it's cool." "I'll" " I'll just" "I'll wait until Evan gets back." "Bender, can you come here for a moment?" "[GRUNT]" "I, uh" " I want to apologize for the way I acted earlier about the whole drugs thing." "No, it's totally cool." "It's history." "I assumed that your way of life spoke to who you were a person, and then I realized that that's the exact same thing my parents did to me." "Um, I understand." "You know, like, this whole moral code thing, so that's" "No." "No, no, no." "Let me finish." "Um, I judged you as immoral, and yet you're the sweetest person I've met since I told my friend I was gay." "I can't do this." "It's because I'm 17." "No." "Apparently, that's totally legal." "It's like you said." "It's ethics." "You're the first girl I ever kissed." "Sh-- no." "[LAUGH] Yeah." "EVAN:" "First option." "Free will." "God has turned us loose upon the world and sits back and laughs as we rape, pillage, torture, and murder each other for millennia." "Second option is pre-determination." "Every detail, every second, every molecule has been planned out since the beginning of time until the end." "In either case, our God's a cruel one, which brings us to option three." "No God." "What's the answer, Maxine?" "It's an unfortunate one, but once fully realized can bring about a profound change in perception." "There is no God, and you never had the choice, only the illusion of choice." "Every decision, thought, and emotion you've ever had as well as everyone else's was already predetermined." "The question then becomes, [SIGH] do you embrace your fate?" "You took the bullets out?" "Most likely, but I've been unstable lately." "I consider myself a Christ-like figure risen from the dead." "Who knows what I might do." "My fate chose me." "[CLICK]" "I'm walking home tonight." "MAXINE:" "OK." "I love you." "I love you." "[SIGH] Thank God." "[MUSIC PLAYING]"