"When watching Hayate no Gotoku, make sure to watch at a good distance away from the TV in a well lit room." "Got it?" "To Ayasaki Hayate, the new butler of the Sanzenin family, a top secret mission was entrusted." "The mission:" "To sneak into the prestigious Hakuou Academy." "Hayate-kun, we understand that you like high places, so do away with the villain already and go to Nagi." "Slay!" "Evil!" "Immediately!" "Prepare yourself!" "Hina." "There you go uttering nonsense again." "And Hayate makes it out of the school in one piece." "However, a new crisis is right around the corner." "What's going on so early in the morning?" "A butler is one who serves." "A butler is one who dedicates himself." "A butler is a formal guardian who supports the days of their master." "Yes." "This is a super combat battle story of a boy who fights, risking his life for a girl." "Nagi, I'll be investigating your new partner to my heart's content." "Milady, it's morning." "Please wake up." "Here is your towel, Milady." "Here is your soup." "Here is your bag." "Let's get changed and go to school." "Hayate, it's a refreshing morning, isn't it?" "Yes, it really is refreshing." "On a refreshing morning like this, the best thing to do is to go- ...Back to bed." "Wh-Why are you going back to bed?" "Hello?" "Milady?" "Oh my, oh my." "Maria-san." "She went yesterday, so I wonder if she's planning to skip the rest of the semester." "That is what she did last year, after all." "Why does Milady hate school that much?" "It's not the school she hates; she hates going outdoors." "As the only daughter of the Sanzenin family, her life was constantly at risk, almost to the point of a daily activity." "Any man who approached her was only after her vast assets." "I see." "That's how she developed such a difficult character." "She's right." "Even how I met her was out of need to pay back a hundred fifty million yen." "But now, I am a butler of this Sanzenin family!" "I must protect her so that she can spend her days with a smile!" "Um, Hayate-kun, you're voicing your entire monologue." "Hello, this is Sanzenin" "Why hello, it has been a while." "How have you been?" "Yes, she is here." "Please wait a moment." "Nagi, you have a phone call." "Who is it?" "Sakuya-san." "From Saku?" "Tell her I'm not here." "I cannot;" "I already told her that you are here." "Oh great." "`ey!" "Is this Nagi?" "*Beep* The number you just dialed is no longer available." "After the tone, leave a message, and you'll find your house in an ocean of fire." "You moron!" "Don't hang up on me like that, you fool!" "I couldn't speak at all!" "Um..." "You are..." "Oops, looks like I gave it too much time in-between the gags." "If I don't do it quicker, no one'll laugh even if it's funny." "All right, we'll have a reflection meeting." "You all gather up, too." "Maria-san, I want Earl Grey." "Bring some for me, will ya?" "Hot!" "It's seriously hot!" "That was boiling water!" "If you don't give me something a little cooler, I can't give any reactions!" "You are putting up enough of an reaction, so don't worry." "And while you're at it, die." "That's my future partner." "Your jabs are fearsome." "Um, who is she?" "Aizawa Sakuya-san." "Daughter of the Aizawa family, a relative of the Sanzenins, and Nagi's childhood friend." "Childhood friend..." "So what did you come here for?" "Besides, today's a weekday." "Why aren't you at school?" "Don't sweat it." "Today's my school's establishment day, so it's closed." "That's why I took it as a chance to come here to check things out." "Check out what?" "Your butler." "I heard you're having a blast of a life with your new butler without even going to school." "So I'm here today to check him out." "To see how funny of a guy he is." "Why do I have to let you check him out?" "Besides, if it's Hayate, you already saw him back there." "Huh?" "Back there?" "The new butler..." "Is a sculpture?" "No, scroll the camera a little more to the right." "And you did that on purpose, didn't you?" "What?" "!" "Then that bro standing there with an empty-looking mind is the new butler?" "!" "Did she come here worrying about Milady?" "Such great weather again." "If the weather keeps up, maybe it'll be summer by the time Golden Week ends." "Then before the rainy season starts, we might start to see the leaves start to change color." "As if, right?" "Of course not, you fool!" "You think you can get a full effect out of that joke with a self-jab?" "Don't mock comedy!" "For every gag you make, there has to be a hardcore jab!" "Um, any more jabs would probably kill Hayate-kun." "Crap!" "Have I become a murderer at this age?" "Makita!" "Kunikita!" "First aid!" "Yes, Ma'am." "Wh-What are you doing?" "!" "He's awake." "Good work." "What's your name?" "Ayasaki Hayate." "What a boring name." "From today, call yourself Mucho the Soybean Lover." "Don't give my butler a name that sounds like a comedian who's going nowhere!" "Yes, that's it." "Girls with that voice and twin ponytails have rough jabs." "No clue what you're talking about." "But it's a fact that he has the poorest face of all the butlers Nagi has had." "Looks like the only way out of this is for me to become his master and form a trio group." "What does it take for you to think in that direction?" "A comedic aspect is not needed in a butler." "Wow, so a butler is even expected to be a comedian, eh?" "No, not usually." "Ayasaki." "Do you know what you lack as a comedian?" "Huh?" "He's a butler!" "It's impact!" "Impact such as going through your life being chased by villains!" "Or getting run over by a car is fine!" "Or fighting against an unknown robot!" "That's the impact you're missing!" "I've already covered those." "Don't talk back to your master!" "Think you're at the pinnacle just because you've become a little popular in this comedy boom?" "At that rate, you won't be able to become the second ***" "Nai or ******." "M-Maria-san..." "Could she possibly be..." "Like Nagi, she is very stubborn." "I-I see." "It must be a common trait in their world." "But I'm a butler, too, now." "I've got to come up with something that will convince everyone." "You win, Aizawa-san." "I'll show you my best one-shot gag, so if that's funny, we'll agree that I've surpassed you!" "One-shot gag?" "Are you sure about that, Hayate?" "You're boxing yourself in too much." "Here I go." "You moron!" "You're mixing things up too much!" "But I like your challenge spirit." "Looks like you found a good comedian, Nagi." "He's a butler." "With that much challenge spirit, I can count on you, Nagi." "Aizawa-san." "So you did come here worrying about Milady after all." "So you know, I haven't fully recognized you yet." "We'll start with a thousand one-shot gags!" "Yes!" "Hey, Hayate!" "He doesn't have to take her seriously." "But seeing him laugh like that, Hayate-kun is still only a boy after all." "Shake your butt more!" "Hey both of you." "It's starting to get cold, so let's head back in." "Yeah!" "Yes, Milady." "Man, I'm so cold." "Yeah, it became cold all of a sudden." "I was right not to go to school." "What kind of rationalization is that?" "It's all because that butler's gags are boring." "Maria, can you get us some tea?" "Apparently we ran out with that last cup." "We have a slight problem now, since we're expecting a visitor soon, too." "Who's coming?" "Isumi." "Hey now..." "What are you two doing, boycotting the school together?" "Don't worry." "Unlike Wataru, we have good grades, so it's not a problem." "But are you sure it's fine?" "Sure about what?" "We're talking about Isumi-san here." "Maybe she got lost and stranded somewhere again." "An errand?" "Can you?" "To this shop." "The money's already paid, and if you tell them you're from the Sanzenins, they will know what brand and how much we want." "Okay!" "Then I'll be on my way!" "Ah, hold on just a moment, Hayate-kun." "Yes?" "When you go out as part of the Sanzenin family, leave with that coat on." "Um, isn't this coat made of cashmere?" "Wow, you can tell?" "Is it all right for me to wear it?" "What if I make this expensive-looking coat dirty while outside?" "What are you saying, Hayate-kun?" "It's not a expensive-looking coat." "It is an expensive coat." "Collect a hundred of those, and your debt is easily payable." "So do not ruin it." "Y-Yes, Sir." "Pachi Pachi Punch!" "Chimatsuri wasshoi." "Milady!" "Lady Isumi!" "Have you found her?" "No, she's not over here." "Hey, you guys!" "I found this fearsome letter in Milady's room!" "What's this?" ""I'm visiting Nagi-chan's house."" ""I'll be back by dinner."" ""Isumi."" "Oh no!" "She's gone out alone!" "She even gets lost inside the mansion." "I heard the Sanzenin Lady was almost kidnapped the other day, too." "Find her!" "If she's going to get kidnapped, we'll gang up on the culprit!" "This expensive coat is making me nervous." "Well I'm only off to buy some tea, so I don't think I'll ruin it or anything." "Oh, I'm sorry for dropping paint that won't ever come off if it gets on cashmere." "P-Please be careful." "Watch out!" "It's a soba sauce that will never come off if it gets on cashmere!" "Oh, thank you." "That was a close one, young man." "I'm fine, but please be careful." "Oh no!" "The car with octopi that squirt ink that won't ever come off if it gets on cashmere!" "This is bad." "I feel dangers all around me as though they're targeted at me." "If I walk through a park without anyone, then I should be fine." "Right, it was this park in which I met Lady Nagi." "Yup, right over by that vending machine." "The machine is broken." "Um, you need to put money in there, not a talisman." "Oh no." "What?" "I was told by my friend not to talk with strangers, yet I am." "Pardon me." "But don't worry." "My friend is a kind person, so I'm sure she'll forgive you." "I see." "That's good to know." "Hayate's sharp instincts were telling him if he gets himself any more involved with her, he'll end up in a very bad situation." "Excuse me now." "At any case, I've become lost in a place like this." "What should I do?" "I must run away." "I must run away." "I must run away." "In order for me to get out of misery, I must run away." "I must run away." "I must run away!" "If it's fine with you, I'll help you out." "Are you familiar with the area around here?" "Not very, but if I just left you standing here, I could easily see you getting kidnapped." "My friend always tells me that, too." "Then, I'd like to accept your kindness and ask for directions." "Please do." "Now where was I going?" "There she is!" "Who are you?" "Hand her over to us." "Who are these suspicious-looking people?" "Who is this suspicious-looking boy?" "Could they be kidnappers?" "Could he be a kidnapper?" "We shall slay you with these swords that cut cashmere really well!" "Take him down!" "Hold on tight." "He's fast." "Um..." "Don't worry." "I'll protect you." "I said don't worry." "But..." "What's wrong?" "I don't see anything below us." "A lake that makes cashmere really dirty if you fall in." "Do not ruin it." "But I can't drop her into the lake." "All right." "A-Are you all right?" "Thanks to you." "Wh-What should I do?" "The expensive cashmere coat..." "It was brand new, and Maria-san told me not to ruin it." "What a careless protagonist." "Shut up!" "But what should I do?" "First I'll give an honest explanation to Maria-san And get yourself fired." "I said shut up!" "What should I do?" "U-Um..." "I told you to shut u" "U-U-Um..." "No, I..." "I meant..." "What do you think of Ul***man?" "Um..." "I like Be*****." "You will?" "Yes, since your coat has been ruined because of me." "So, I'd like to compensate you." "Thank you." "But your thoughts for it are enough." "But..." "It's my fault, and although it happened through a series of events, I'm the one that said I'd protect you." "I will protect you from those evil men in black." "Evil men in black?" "No, they are" "I know!" "They're from an evil organization trying to kidnap you, right?" "No, um..." "Don't worry." "I know people like them have an information web everywhere, so I won't do anything careless." "No, what I mean is..." "I may not look it, but I've gone through a lot, too." "So don't worry." "If you don't get dry, you'll catch a cold and die." "Thank you." "But I'm fine." "I-I was too late." "No, no." "I'm not dead yet." "For now, though, I must take her somewhere safe." "Hey, there is a good place." "This is..." "Did it surprise you?" "But it's a house of someone I know, so don't worry." "The master of the house is a small girl about your age." "A little stubborn and selfish, she sometimes goes so wild that you can't control her," "but she's very kind and cute." "I think I can be good friends with her, as though I've known her from long ago." "But, because of certain reasons, I can't go in, so the rest is up to you." "Ring and away!" "Um..." "What will happen to the compensation for the expensive cashmere coat?" "The crisis for getting fired is approaching." "And a new enemy created by wrong judgment approaches." "Next week, along with all the above mentioned, we'll fight against the symptoms of a fever, as well!" "Come to think of it, I'm hungry." "Wait!" "We must wait until Isumi gets here." "How are you so weak that you've caught a cold all of a sudden?" "Although it was Nagi's fault for shutting him out, I'm the one originally at fault." "Yes, the final blow was Milady." "Fine, then I'll specially cook porridge." "Eh?" "!" "You have a problem with that?" "Next time on Hayate no Gotoku." "You Said You Can See Time, But That's Probably Your Life Flashing By." "Did she put this in instead of oil?" "You will see Time cry."