"In the 1880s, the Sudan and Central Africa suddenly burst into flames as Arab slavers and great bands of Muslim fanatics rallied behind the Mahdi, a mystical figure who proclaimed himself the reincarnation of the Prophet Mohammad." "Their aim... to conquer the Sudan and stop General Gordon's attempt to stamp out the age-old trade in black gold - slaves." "Khartoum became a city under siege." "Across the Nile at Omdurman, countless thousands of natives were gathered, dooming a peace mission Gordon had undertaken for the Egyptian Khedive and the English Queen." "From Omdurman, the Mahdi's riders swept through the land, bringing sudden terror and death to a people who had thought themselves safe under the protection of the legendary English general." "Darfur fell, then Bahr el Ghazal, and a dozen more places along the upper reaches of the once-peaceful Nile." "An expedition was sent up by river as this seemed the quickest way to relieve Gordon and the beleaguered city of Khartoum." "Thousands of men were conscripted by the British to tow the heavy gunboats up the Nile, past Berber." "The natives pulled the steamers from the shore and from dhows, but the British command had miscalculated and the convoy of men and supplies was in trouble from the start." "The natives, chanting in unison, strained on the tow ropes, but the boats made little progress." "The swift current and the low level of the river - unexpected at that time of year - were the undoing of the expedition." "Even the light Arab dhows found difficulty sailing against the swift-running Nile." "The heavy steamers moved hardly at all." "More men were recruited to pull on the ropes and their native overseers were generous in their use of the whip." "Hundreds fell by the wayside and others were found to replace them, but their efforts were not to be rewarded." "Finally, it was not possible for the British gunboats to be manoeuvred through the shallows or the rapids." "As the reinforcements tried in vain to make their way upriver," "Gordon sent a despairing message." ""Now mark this", he said." ""If the expeditionary force " ""and I ask for no more than 200 men, does not come in ten days," ""the town may fall and I have done my best for the honour of our country"." "Realising the English force would not reach Gordon in time, a second relief column tried to cross the treacherous desert to Khartoum." "They left Korti and marched to Metemma, but their progress was slow, causing yet further delay in the relief of the besieged city." "The news of the second British advance reached the Mahdi, and soon tribes from all of Sudan assembled and planned an overwhelming attack on the smaller enemy force." "The Mahdi's followers were armed only with primitive spears, shields, and swords." "But they had the tactical advantages of numbers and surprise." "Before dawn, hundreds of the fiercest warriors slowly crept forward, surrounding the British encampment." "They moved unseen and unheard, in the stillness of the desert night." "The British were on their guard - they were now deep in enemy territory and they knew they could expect an attack, but they did not know the size of the enemy force which would be thrown against them." "The only hope of the British was to make their way through the enemy lines unseen and reach Khartoum without a battle." "By first light, the Mahdi's dervishes had encircled the British defensive square." "Then, their blood-curdling war-cries signalled the beginning of the onslaught." "We seem to be a bit outnumbered." "A wee bit." "Uh!" "Get up!" "Warn Barash!" "I'm not leaving, Sir." "Besides, I thought I was awaiting court martial." "I'm ordering you to get out and warn Barash." "Get out of here?" "How?" "You can get out of anywhere, Baker." "Good luck, Sir." "Ah!" "Ah!" "Ah!" "Come on!" "Asua!" "This way!" "Over here!" "This isn't Noah's Ark, we don't need two of everything." "Swim, son!" "That's it." "Gotcha." "Help - he's heavy." "He's your catch, you pull him in yourself." "Here, try sitting up." "Khartoum..." "Yes, all right, mate." "Yeah, we're making for Khartoum." "If Khartoum's still there." "Relief column..." "Yes, yes." "We know all about it." "Now you, save your strength, man." "Save your strength." "What the devil do you think you're doing?" "Getting rid of some dead weight." "Very dead." "You'll do no such thing." "Look, Miss..." "What's your name?" "Woodville!" "We're in the middle of a war, we're not punting on the Thames and we've got no Union Jacks to drape the bodies in, either." "Why can't we give him a decent burial?" "Because I say he's going over the side, that's why." "Even with your military experience, you must appreciate we've got to get as far from Barash as possible by daylight, right?" "What sort of a Christian are you?" "The kind of Christian that prefers staying alive." "His weight can't make that much difference to our speed." "No?" "Haven't your feet told you what's happening in the bottom of the boat?" "Some of the heathen bullets hit below the water line." "Very unsporting." "Oh, please." "All right - if you want to keep the Major on board, we'd better start bailing - and quick." "What with?" "Your pretty field boots, son - they'll do." "And you, too, Miss." "I don't happen to be wearing field boots." "Well, have this, then." "Oh!" "Oh!" "Come on, come on - start bailing!" "Start bailing, get on with it." "Why not try and beach her now?" "Because it's night, because we can't see, because there's rocks and sand bars, because we'd lose the boat if not our lives, that's why not!" "Now, come on - bail, damn it, bail!" "That's right - well done, boy." "What's your name?" "Asua, sir, and I'm not a boy." "Are we going to sink?" "No, no." "No, we're not going to sink." "Here - come on." "I'll do this." "You lie down up here." "Curl up." "Go to sleep, hm?" "I promise you, we'll be all right." "Go on, you go to sleep!" "All right." "Up and out!" "It's not the Port of London but it's land, you can get ashore." "Mr Murchison?" "I'm sorry." "Reminded me of the town drunk on a Saturday night." "He always fell in the river, too." "No!" "Come on lady, why not take it right off?" "You'll find it easier." "Very gentlemanly of you to suggest it." "That's me, every inch a gentleman." "There you are, love, I told you we'd make it, didn't I?" "I'd not doubt you, sir." "Al right, come on, first thing is to get the stores out of the boat." "First thing is to give the major a decent burial." "I don't think the major looks too impatient, our job is to keep the living alive." "And you call yourself an officer and a gentleman?" "No, no I'm afraid the rank's not mine, just the first jacket I happened to pick up." "Baker, Richard." "Private, three times in Her Majesty Queen Victoria's army." "Of which there's precious little left around here." "I should have know it." "Yes, I reckon you should." "It's the uniform that makes the man, isn't it, Mr Murchison?" "Well, come on, let's get..." "The major." "As you wish, Miss Woodville." "He died far from home, far from family, in violence and bloodshed..." "Please!" "and we commend his soul to your keeping..." "Oh!" "in the knowledge that whatever happens to each of us is your will." "Murchison!" "Murchison!" "Help." "Murchison!" "Over here, come on!" "Well, there you are, Miss Woodville, that's what comes of mis-timed piety." "We've lost the boat and half the stores." "We wouldn't have lost the boat if you'd beached it properly, private Baker." "Lady, I'm a soldier, or was, not Admiral Nelson." "Well, you've got the rifle, that's the most important thing, isn't it?" "Yeah, use it for a walking stick, the ammunition got away from us." "How many bullets in that little pouch of yours, Mr Murchison?" "About two dozen." "Oh, then we've got one pistol and two dozen bullets to last us while we 're waiting." "You're not thinking of staying here, for goodness sake, why?" "Because I wouldn't like to see the vultures picking those ladylike bones." "Don't try and frighten me, private Baker, and please don't frighten Asua," "Her father was the Emir of Barash and his dying wish was that" "I should take her to General Gordon in Khartoum, and as her tutor," "I intend to see his last wishes are carried out." "That's why I've dressed her like an ordinary native child." "Miss Woodville, how long have you been in Africa?" "Almost two months." "Then let me give you a little lesson geography." "Look, here is the Nile, here is Khartoum, here is Barash, where we started, Bargasil, Darfur," "The little villages, I'd say we're about there." "One to Khartoum by water that's 100 miles, it's a little far to swim." "Then we'll go overland." "Miss Woodville, I'm as keen to get to Khartoum as you are, perhaps more so, but which ever way we go by land we'll hit swamps, full of local gentry like...him." "Not to mention the Mahdi's raiders, Arab slavers and hostile natives who've never read the ten commandments, and don't know about, "thou shalt not kill"." "There must be friendly natives as well?" "There were." "With missionaries among them?" "Those who've not been put in the pot for their pains." "Barash wasn't the only town attacked in the Sudan, when the news of this reaches Khartoum, they'll be a gunboat on the river here." "Sent to pick up survivors, so we're going to stay right here." "Let Khartoum come to us." "So." "You make yourself really nice and at home and I'll make sure our paradise has no devils in it." "And if I meet any missionaries unpotted," "I'll let you know." "Do you think he's right?" "Yes, although I dislike his manner just as much as you do." "Asua, get my things." "There you are, it's all ours." "It's not Mayfair, but its home." "What's all this packing in aid of?" "Well, you can stay and play Robinson Crusoe if you want," "But I'm leaving." "Asua!" "Where are you off to, may I ask?" "To civilisation, which is more than I've found here." "Mr Murchison, you'd better trot along with them." "Miss Woodville!" "And bring them back alive!" "Miss Woodville!" "Miss Woodville, I'll take this." "Oh!" "They're quite harmless, now, you watch." "Oh, it's sweet." "Ah, look!" "We met a lion!" "You didn't!" "Yes!" "Shh!" "Hello, welcome back." "SO you all decided to play Robinson Crusoe." "I heard the artillery firing, did you have a nice little stroll?" "Very nice, thank you." "Roar!" "You, you..." "Come on, hurry, hurry." "Here it comes, everything in, quick!" "Come on, all of you!" "Come on!" "Come one in, home from home complete with running water, all of it cold." "I'm very grateful, don't think I'm not, but you don't think you're sleeping in here with us?" "Woman, this is not time for conventions, I'm dammed if I'm going to sleep outside in the rain." "I'm dammed if you're coming in here!" "Get out!" "What are you doing?" "Don't do that!" "And that's about enough from you too, young lady." "She was right, you know, old chap." "I only wanted to sleep dry in the same hut, I didn't say bed." "What it What's the matter, Miss Woodville?" "Let me go!" "What are you doing?" "Oh, Mr Baker, I'm sorry, I was dreaming," "I thought we were back in Barash and I was frightened." "You don't need to apologise, we all get frightened, right now I'm frightened this hut's coming down... get out!" "You see?" "What was the name of the document that first took absolute power away from the English king?" " The Magna Carta." " When was it signed?" " 1215." " Who signed it?" "The Caliph John." "King John." "And where was it signed?" "Er..." "Miss Woodville!" "They're calling us!" "Where's Sir Galahad?" "He's gone off to catch the dinner." "Fish again, I suppose." "Well, I seem to remember you can be quite strong when you want to be, will you give me a hand?" "I would if I knew what you are trying to do." "I'm trying to get us out of here." "By completely destroying the boat?" "Look, matches, making fire, timbers, full of tar, tar make black smoke, gunboat sees black smoke, we all rescued, me velly clever!" "I wish I could be sure." "So do I." "Come on, let's give it a chance, now you put those pretty little hands that's right and pull like it was me you got hold of." "All right, pull!" "Go on, pull!" "Harder, put your back in it!" "Your back, I said." "Are you all right?" "Yes." "But you could have been hurt." "No, I'm fine." "What kind of work is this to ask a lady to do it?" "I'm not hurt, truly." "Just brush me down." "If you say so." "Mr Murchison could you tear yourself away just for a second?" "Asua, Come along, we haven't finished our lessons yet." "Could we not wait a little longer?" "Till Murchison sahib goes falling down?" "Go on!" "Might as well chuck stones at it." "Suppose that means fish again for dinner." "'Asua!" "'" "Oh, no!" "Asua!" "What is it?" "Mr Baker, have you seen Asua, we can't find her anywhere!" "We've looked everywhere." "Asua!" "Asua." "Yes, Mr Baker, sir?" "Use the pistol." "Useless, the bullets would just bounce off." "Asua, Don't be afraid, I'm close behind you." "Will you try and do what I tell you?" "I will try, sir." "Good." "Now just start walking backwards towards me." "Don't look round, keep going backwards." "Take your time." "Come on, well done." "There's a big tree only a few more steps behind you." "Keep going..." "Are you all right?" "Thank you, Mr Baker, sir." "The next time, pick a playmate your own size, huh?" "Yes, sir." "Your paradise is a hell, private Baker, Asua, might have been killed." "Asua is your responsibility." "I am tired sitting here waiting for your mythical gunboat." "Yes, I'm disappointed in General Gordon myself." "I'd have thought he'd sent his private yacht for us now." "How many more of us have to be gored or trampled on before you'll admit you made a mistake?" "Take what's left of the stores and traipse off where ever you want." "I'm sick to death of being nursemaid to a nanny and two children." "Private Baker, you will apologise to Miss Woodville for that last remark." "And to me." "Would you call off your protector here, it's way past his bedtime?" "You've a horrid tongue, Private Baker." "Lord knows I need it with the likes of you." "Private Baker, I ordered you to apologise." "Look, we're tired, worried, right?" "But that's not good enough!" "I said, apologise!" "And we're gong to stay right here, like it or not!" "Very brave of you, Private Baker, to attack someone half your size, why don't you throw me in as well?" "When God made women, why didn't he give them common sense?" "As well as the more obvious attributes." "It's a boat!" "It's a boat!" "Miss Woodville, Miss Woodville!" "On the river, it's a boat!" "Quick!" "It's a boat!" "Over here, over here, over here, over here!" "It's a boat!" "Over here!" "Here!" "Mr Baker, your boat has come!" "Is it?" "Does that look like a gunboat?" "What are you doing?" "It's a boat." "It's an Arab slaver and she's seen us, thanks to you." "Come on, we're getting out of here quick!" "Come on, give me your hand, Run!" "Hurry, go on, run, grab your things, get that tinned stuff, go on." "Never mind that." "Smile, Miss Woodville, Come on, we're going to find some adventures the hard way, come on!" "Run, all of you." "How much longer?" "I don't know." "Ask him." "All right, let's rest." "Come on." "Look, elephants!" "Oh, yes, they're lovely!" "And the monkeys!" "It's the biggest zoo in the world." "You know what they're saying?" "What a big zoo to keep poor humans in." "I wish they'd come closer." "If we hide down here and are very quiet perhaps the monkeys will come down from the trees." "You can take your hand off my waist now, Mr Baker." "How do you manage to do it?" "Do what?" "Collect so many admirers." "They're putting on a show for us!" "Just like a circus!" "Yeah, they can sing, too!" "They can?" "Oh, yes!" "Mind you, they have terrible voices." "You've offended them!" "I always thought hippopotami were thick-skinned." "He LAUGHS" "Oh-oh!" "Joke over." "Come on, on your feet!" "On we go." "Think you can make it up those rocks?" "Come on, then, Miss Woodville." "Hitch up those skirts." "You think the Arabs are still behind us, don't you?" "Come on, climb." "Why should they bother with a small party like us?" "Small, but valuable, Miss Woodville." "What could we have that could be possibly of any value to them?" "Look,..." "Do you know the market price of a white woman in these parts?" "A woman with fair hair?" "I'm sorry." "I shouldn't have said that." "I apologise." "First time you've done THAT." "What?" "Apologise." "And the first time you've nothing to apologise for." "You're an odd one, aren't you?" "I've met a few women in my time." "But you confound me." "You really do." "Come on." "Oh!" "Right." "Up we go!" "They're gone!" "Come on, get a fire going!" "It's my fault." "It's my fault!" "Come on, go and get a blanket." "Oh, God!" "I thought I had hold of her hand, but I let it slip." "My fault!" "Don't blame yourself." "It was an accident." "Here." "Can YOU do this?" "It's my arm, it got..." "I tried to catch her, but I wasn't quick enough!" "Oh, this is useless!" "Oh, God, please don't let her die!" "Please, please, please don't let her die." "Please, God." "You keep praying." "Keep pumping, too." "Please, God, please!" "Please." "Please, God!" "Here, let me." "Look!" "Look!" "She's alive!" "She's breathing!" "Look, look, look!" "Murchison!" "Murchison!" "Murchison!" "Mr Murchison?" "Are you awake?" "Yes." "Don't look now, but we have visitors." "You get together what you can of the gear." "I'll go calling on Miss Woodville." "Miss Woodville." "It's all right." "Don't be alarmed." "There's a party of natives on the cliff, up above us." "I'm sure it'll be all right, but we're just going to... get out." "Just get your things together." "Follow me." "Keep close behind me, now." "Keep walking." "Don't look up, whatever happens." "Obviously, a bit out of practice." "Now, listen you!" "Emshi!" "You go play somewhere else." "Right?" "Come on." "Let's keep going." "We'll all get killed, Mr Baker!" "Not unless their aim improves." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "!" "This man, son of General Gordon!" "General Gordon." "And we all friends." "What's the word?" "R-r-r-rafiqi." "Rafiqi!" "Friends!" "Right?" "!" "Come on." "On we go." "I suspect you were using the wrong word, Mr Baker." "Don't any of you heathens speak English?" "!" "I speak." "English," "Arabic, and Swahili." "I am Kimrasi." "Brother to the king of the Bogoro." "Good." "Well, you call up your friends up there, before this little game gets out of hand." "Gun, please." "First, we talk." "Gun?" "!" "Yes." "Of course." "Careful, careful." "Go on, run!" "Run, Murchison!" "Gun, quick." "All right." "Since you put it so nicely." "We come in peace." "With gun in hand?" "We will pay for your help!" "Well?" "I was a slave to the Arabs." "Five years." "Before I escaped, the English used to deal with my master." "THEY did not offer to help ME." "The little one is not English." "Take your hands off her!" "Follow me!" "What are they going to do?" "You want to use civilisation when you've found it." "Even speaking the Queen's English." "They don't seem like the others." "Ceremonial dancers." "Dressed to kill." "The little one not English needs a doctor." "Dr Mganga." "Well, they..." "They must be peaceful, if they've got missionary doctors." "Do you know what 'Mganga' means in Swahili?" "Let's try and get through here." "Excuse me." "Excuse me, please." "Mganga!" "Inside." "NO!" "NO!" "Don't touch her!" "We've no choice!" "Unless something's done, she'll die." "This child..." "If anything happens to her..." "We, too, have children." "Now we must leave here." "Come on, do not stop." "Kimrisi, I would like to present the king with these binoculars." "And, certainly, when we get to Khartoum, with his help," "General Gordon will load him with many more gifts." "This is Gordon Pasha's favourite son." "And if anything happens to us," "Gordon Pasha will destroy this village, and your whole tribe." "Please, TELL him that." "Gordon Pasha is starving." "Khartoum will be crushed by the Mahdis." "Everywhere the Mahdi kills, the drums say so." "The drums lie!" "General Gordon will scatter his enemies like the lion scatters the jackals!" "The king says, "If this is true, why do you come alone," ""in rags, to our country?"" ""From whom do you run?"" "This is my wife." "Mr Baker, you're taking..." "Be quiet!" "SHUT UP!" "Kimrasi." "Was the king convinced about us?" "I told him she must be your wife, to behave with so much anger." "Yes, but will he help us?" "Gondoko believe that people are good, because they are not strong enough to be bad." "Unless what you say is true," "Arab strong, and Gordon is only good." "But you know what the Arabs are like." "They took you as a slave." "Arabs are like great sickness." "Some, it takes." "Others, it leaves." "Always, it has been so." "Will you go in, please?" "Go ahead!" "I'm not carrying you over the threshold." "Aw!" "A man may have many wives." "A wife, only one man." "You sleep over here." "How DARE you let them think we were married!" "And then slapped me, as though we were!" "Miss Woodville, it's a question of whose harem you prefer." "Mine, or King Gondoko's?" "I'm sure I can still soon fix them." "Oh, no, Mr Baker!" "I'm sure this time you've made the RIGHT decision." "Oh!" "Are they going on all night?" "Apparently." "Well..." "We're still alive!" "Only keeping up the marital appearances." "Well, please don't." "Friendly little thing, aren't you." "I'd say you're the most bad-tempered, cantankerous, obstinate..." "..marvellous woman I've EVER met." "I think I must be falling in love with you." "Well, please don't." "I..." "I don't deserve it." "Deserve?" "What's that got to do with it?" "I lied to you when I said I'd been in Africa for two months." "I guessed that." "Two weeks, more like, the way you went blundering off into the bush." "More like two years." "Most of it was misery." "A father who called himself an archaeologist." "The only digging he did was in Cairo bars." "When he died, he left me without a penny." "You don't owe me an explanation." "I do." "When Asua's mother died, her father was looking for someone to... to be with him." "So, you see, I'm not quite the innocent governess you imagined." "Did you love him?" "He was good to me, and I loved Asua." "Well, then, there's nothing to regret but his death, is there?" "Oh, I don't exactly wear a halo myself, you know." "I'm Private Baker, all right." "Three times busted sergeant, like I said." "Once busted, you get prison." "Like I didn't say." "Oh, it's a great place, the Army." "Lose yourself, keep out of trouble." "Baker!" "Miss Woodsville." "It's Asua, come quickly." "What?" "Asua..." "Asua!" "Miss Woodville!" "Oh, Asua." "Oh!" "I'm better now." "I can't believe it..." "by a witch doctor!" "Well, why not?" "We have them in London too." "Only they wear striped trousers." "Where are we, Mr Baker, sir?" "I'd say right in the consulting room, but we're going to get you out." "Come on, Murchison, let's take a look around." "Now, you get better and get strong!" "Or you'll have some more of the treatment, eh?" "Yes." "Morning." "Nice day." "Don't let us interrupt the House of Commons." "What about that wall there, eh?" "Do you think we'll make it?" "It's a bit high, hey?" "You always have this many guards?" "Only when there is valuable property to protect." "Khartoum has fallen." "Gordon Pasha's head parade on a pike on the Mahdist camp." "I don't believe it." "So much for your lion who scattered jackals." "The Arab slave are only a day away." "Our turn is coming, and yours." "They search for two English soldier and a white woman." "Then fight." "With spears against guns?" "With anything." "Isn't it better than slavery?" "Do you think of us or only yourself?" "Of both!" "Gondoko will not fight." "Well then, at least move out of here!" "Don't let it be scooped up like fish in a net." "Gondoko will not fight or run." "He will barter you to the Arab slaver for gold." "Take this, before it's too late." "Come with us." "My wife and child will be sold." "Go back to your hut, now, before it's too late." "Aargh!" "Huh!" "That should wake the neighbours." "Come on!" "Come on - run, run, run!" "Back here." "Why don't they throw their spears?" "To keep us alive... to sell us to the Arabs." "You wait there." "Mr Murchison, you have hidden talents." "Gondoko forget that I know what it is to be a slave." "Is that all that's going with us?" "What about the others?" "They will not come." "They celebrate their freedom from Gondoko." "Freedom...till the slavers come in the morning." "In his heart, each believe it will be his neighbour the slaver takes... not him." "But they're mad!" "We must talk to them." "It's no good, I have talked to them!" "The Arab has put fear in their hearts and they say there's no use fleeing him." "What can I do?" "Nothing Kimrasi, come with us." "We have a chance, the Relief Column." "Now, can we make it to the Nile." "If we hurry." "The Arabs are on horses and we're on foot." "How will the Arabs know which way we've gone?" "Would you not tell, if it could save you from slavery?" "Horses stopped." "How far to the Nile?" "Too far." "Are you certain?" "At least horses can't climb rocks." "I wish you would be wrong just sometimes." "Well, there's no use trying to outrun them." "Look, there's a big herd of elephant over there, can we get round the back of them without disturbing them?" " Yes." " Come on, let's try." "Come on, Mr Baker, come on, jump!" "I don't know - elephants, boats, rafts..." "how do you do it, Mr Baker?" "Just a natural-born escaper." "Here, let me." "You see, we are punting on the Thames after all." "So we are." "Your place... on the cushion!" "OH!" "We'll travel by day and hide by night until we get past Khartoum." "That is if we get that far." "Get down!" "Get down!" "Not a sound, not even if we're challenged." "Looks like you've been praying again." "It looks deserted." "Where are the Mahdist troops?" "Shh!" "That's where they are." "The Relief Column?" "Yeah." "Sounds like fighting round Matema." "Stand ready." "'Stand ready!" "'" "'100 yards..." "'Fire!" "'" "They've taken Matema." "Miss Woodville!" "Miss Woodville!" "Well?" "Well, the British are here all right, but not for much longer by the look of it." "What are we going to do?" "I don't know..." "I'm afraid I'm clean out of ideas." "And elephants." "I was stationed in this town." "Behind the building with the black flag is the arsenal." "If we strolled in and blew it sky-high, it would even-up the odds a bit, wouldn't it?" "Blow it up, eh?" "All right then, favourite son of Gordon Pasha." "Let's have a go!" "Take care of yourself... and keep a lighted candle in the window." "What have we got into?" "Let's try another way." "Prison guards." "Those prisoners in there... reinforcements ready-made." "Kimrasi, you speak Arabic." "That's appreciation for you." "Come on!" "Baker, I found the magazines back here." "Get out!" "Go on, out of here!" "Get 'em all out." "Out, quick!" "Go on, get out." "I wish he'd hurry up." "Wait, where'd you get that?" "I always keep one around... in case of emergencies." "Ha-ha!" "Mr Murchison?" "Yes, sir?" "General's compliments and his personal congratulations" " on extraordinary valour under fire." " Thank you very much, sir." "Which is Private Baker?" "Er, that's me, sir." "Baker, Richard, Private, sir." "Ah, we've been looking for you." "You're under arrest." "Guard." "Private Baker, you are charged with deserting your post while awaiting court martial." "Mr Baker!" "Oh!" "This man is under arrest." "But that's absolute nonsense!" "You must be mistaken." "That's ridiculous." "You can make statements to the court martial in Cairo." "Permission to embrace the lady, sir?" "What, here?" "In front of all these people?" "In front of the whole perishing army." "Don't worry, we've got out of worse than this." "Excuse me, madam." "Bring him down to the gun boat." "Excuse me, sir... that gun boat, might I ask, sir, where it's been?" "Up the Nile beyond Khartoum picking up survivors from various towns." "I don't see what's so funny." "No, sir." "I'm sorry, sir, I don't imagine you would, sir." "Subtitles by Red Bee Media"