"(upbeat electronic music)" " What the fuck?" "That joint was supposed to go to me." "What, instead it went to little Darby Crash over there?" " He was cute enough." " We'll see about that." "Can I borrow that?" "(rattling)" "He wasn't." "You didn't get a chance to look at him." " He's my type." " You're like my little sister, only she likes guys who look rich." "Men in suits, really boring men in suits." " I want a rebel, like a guy you meet at a protest, maybe the one holding the Molotov cocktails." " You think guys that look like that are rebels?" "That jerk and you probably have no common ground." "You're ready to fuck him because of his jacket and his patches." "So this little fuck over there probably has some overprotective investment banker father and you would get bored of him as soon as his clothes were lying on your floor and you'd realize he wasn't the little rebel you were looking for." "(intense music)" " [Ezra] Do we need to talk about murder to get your attention?" " What do you think I'm a fucking killer?" " Really Cat?" " It's fashion." "Chill out." " More like fascism." " So what?" "Siouxie Sioux is punk." " Actually it's for Sophie Scholl." "I swear I saw that daddy in Schéneberg last week." "But I don't know, they all look the same." " What were you doing in Schéneberg?" " I was buying a strap-on." "That neighborhood's really great, though." " Why, so you can check out the leather daddies?" " No, because it's one of the oldest gay neighborhoods in the world." "Christopher Isherwood wrote about it, the nightclub El Dorado since 1920s." "The smell of poppers floats down the sidewalk." "Plus there's all these great sex shops." "And you fags don't even know about it?" " It always just seemed so far away." " True, but the hustler bars are great." "And what is it, Tuesday?" "Nothing else is going on." "We should go, like, right now." "(upbeat punk music)" "♪ She's a pretty girl but" "♪ She doesn't have a fucking clue" "Desire will set you free" "♪ What to do" " I mean, it was kinda funny." "You wanna know what she said?" " Who has something nice to say about me?" " She said you were a Nazi with a fag on either side." " Great, just like this fucking guy." " Let's go, guys" "Hi man." " It's only for men now." " What?" " Men only." " This is wack." "This is misogyny." "This is women-hating." "This is sexism." " Hey, mens only." " This is the patriarchal system out of fucking control." " Catherine, let's just" " No, forget it." "Look." "I'm more of a man than any of these little fags." "And I probably have a bigger dick, too." "You wanna see it?" "(thumping dance music)" " Everyone just always talks about your titties." "Now who's gonna touch my penis?" "Is that a Schimpfwort?" "(speaking German) You look cute." "Thanks, but we're not for sale." " Give it a few years." "(laughing)" "We're just looking." "Looking?" "Be glad someone is looking, right?" "Right, but I'm not interested." " Nothing I can do then, bye." " I get a little uncomfortable even/body's staring at us." " Is it your boyfriend?" " No." "" No?" " Fags." "So how long have you been working here for?" " [Man] Two months." " [Catherine] Yeah?" " Catherine's so crazy." " We are not gay." " Sure you are." "What are you doing here?" " Working." " Yeah?" " Mm hmm." " Fags work too." "Sometimes." " [Man] But what are you doing here?" " I'm a whore too." "I was practically born a whore." " [Man] Wanna see my wife?" " Why would I want to see your wife?" " Look, my daughter." " [Catherine] Nice." " Really nice." "You have children?" " No." " You want children?" "Nice perfume." "Very fruity." "." "Hey" "(whispers)" " Yeah?" "I thought you'd come with me, fuck me?" "I thought you'd come home with me." "We'll think of something." " Okay, we're gonna leave." " You guys are leaving." " Yes." " Together?" " [Catherine] Yes." " [Ezra] Are you sure?" " Have a good night, okay?" " Okay'" " Okay, bye." " Bye." "He'!" "" " Hi." " Can I get you a drink?" " Sure, I'll take a Radler." "Sorry, could we get a shandy and a beer, please?" " You from Berlin?" " No, I'm from Russia." " Things are not so good there for queers though, huh?" " No, not so good." "But probably not as bad as you think." " I mean I was so moved by the whole Pussy Riot thing and that guy, Danke Shoen, the guy that nailed his balls to the ground in front of the Kremlin, so fucking amazing, right?" "Do you wanna do some MDMA?" "(laughing)" "This is the bar they used to hang out in." "I love David Bowie." "I mean he's one of these artists that like saw into the future." "Do you know Jobriath and Klaus Nomi?" "So good." "Do you want to go to the lake?" " This weekend?" " No, right now." " It's raining." " It'll be sunny by the time we get there." "(mellow music)" "♪ I would love you to use me amuse me" "♪ I'm chained to your insanity" "♪ Any day you could buy me or tie me up" "♪ A slave to your perversity" "♪ Refuse me" "♪ Diffuse me" "♪ To the corners of the galaxy" "♪ And take me out" "♪ You'll take me out" "♪ Take me out" "♪ Take me out" "♪ You just amaze me and daze me" "♪ You're the blind spot in my consciousness" "♪ Come on and forsake me and break me" "♪ And drink the blood of my obsession" "♪ Make me cry out and die out of love" "♪ For this world is fantasy" "♪ Refuse me" "♪ Diffuse me" "♪ To the corners of the galaxy" "♪ And take me out" "♪ Take me, take me out" "♪ Take me out" "♪ Take me out" "♪ No no no no don't" "♪ No no no give it to me" "♪ No no no no don't" "♪ No no no give it to me" "♪ Take me out oh baby I'm ready" "♪ For your troubles I'm expedient" " [Ezra] You don't want to stay for breakfast?" " Sorry, I must go." "But thanks for last night." "It was fun, no?" " Can I see you again?" " Yeah, I'll text you." " Asshole." " I'm gonna make a coffee, okay?" "Do you want one?" " Whatever." " Well do you want one or not?" " Whatever, I don't care." "Yes, I want coffee, thank you." "(phone ringing)" " Hi." "." "Hey" "You wanna come over for breakfast?" " It's 4 p.m." "Call it brunch and then you've got a deal." " Okay'" "I'm here, just come over whenever." " Okay bye" "What?" " Nothing." "(child jabbering)" " Okay, everyone move over for the breeders." "So we went to this party-." "Some like Roman nightclub." "But then I got home and Jayne was pissed." "We had to fuck in the bathroom because she locked the bedroom door." " Both of those guys." " Not really, one of them couldn't get it up." " I bet I know which one." " I bet you don't." "It was so awkward too because you know how small my bathroom is." "But you know it's like, Jayne and I, we're supposed to be in this free, open relationship but I think" "if she knew that there were two hookers in the bathroom with me she would have flipped her shit." "You know?" "She probably just assumed it was some trendy dyke." " [Ezra] What do you see in her anyways?" " She's like a Midwest diner beauty queen." "So how was your night?" " It was alright." " Yeah?" " It was good." "How do you know after like the first night with someone if there was a connection?" " Well what do you mean by connection?" " I mean like a romantic connection." " Romantic?" " [Ezra] What, you don't believe in romance?" " I didn't say that." "Did he make direct eye contact?" " Hard to say." "It was late." " I should go." "So we'll see you at Gorlitzer Park on Friday?" " Yeah, you mean tomorrow." " Is it the weekend already?" "Feels like I never have any time to get any work done." "Okay" "Bye." "We understand each other, we love each other, we don't need to always go over and remember these negative things." "Think about three days ago when we were having sex and it was so hot, you know what I mean?" "(whistling)" "What, you like that?" " Yeah." " Hold on a second." "What, you like this?" " Yeah, yeah, yeah." " Do you have a girlfriend at home?" " No." " No?" " No, I really like what I see." " Yeah, okay, yeah, shut up." "(slaps)" " on." " This fucking asshole." "No, I don't know, just some guy, you know, they're just rude to me." "I walk down this bridge every fucking day." "Jayne, don't give it to me, okay?" "I didn't do anything." "Why are you always so nervous and so uptight?" "Like, look, I understand you, okay?" "I understand you." "I think we're just, we're trying to work as emotional beings." "And that we should just be open to whomever or whatever comes across or enlightens our desires." "All we can do is hope that it's reciprocated." "And with you it is." "I reciprocate your love." "What?" " I can't do this non-monogamous thing with you." " I love you." "I do, I love you." "I respect and care and love you, okay?" "(Sultry music)" "Give me a kiss." " Oh, you ruined them." "(laughing)" "Oh, it's wet." "♪ All I really really really really really" "♪ Really really really want to see" "♪ Is a total eclipse of the sun" "♪ All I really really really really really" "♪ Really really really want to see" "♪ Is a total eclipse of the sun" "♪ Says everyone" "♪ Just the birds are silent with surprise" "(giggling)" "♪ All I really really really really really" "♪ Really really really want to see" "♪ Is a total eclipse of the sun" "(soft singing)" "(intensifying bagpipe music)" " [Catherine] She was a crazy Nazi sympathizer." " Uh huh." " She was British." " British, yes, I know her." " She was totally in love with" " Yeah yeah yeah, she was a very arrogant lady-." " [Catherine] Yeah." "(speaking German)" " Did you know that Bette Midler bought all the parks in New York City?" " She has so much money that every park is now a Bette Midler park." " I heard you stuck seven hits of pussy up your acid." " Oh yeah." "(laughing)" "On the seventh day I'm like fucking wigging out because even!" "day for seven days I took a hit of acid and decided okay, this is the seventh day," "I put seven in my vagina." "But I had recently read a shit-ton on Babylon, the Tower of Babylon, big phallus, and that's like how you can control people with... (whispering)" "(laughing)" "It just works perfectly with the concept of the muse, like musing each other instead of using each other." "And I developed that after discovering that the internet was actually my vehicle of sending love, and I can send it through my vagina, which is now accessible to everyone." "(singing)" "♪ A caged bird doesn't sing" "♪ But my wings have been clipped" "♪ And I couldn't see a thing" "♪ All I needed was protection" "♪ And you were right there for me" "♪ Your love got me lifted" "♪ So high in the sky" "♪ I'm free" "♪ To fly" "'Cause it's just be shamed for so long." "♪ I'm free to fly" "♪ Finally free to fly" "♪ I'm free to fly" "(audio distorting)" "(intensifying music)" "(murmurs and shouting from crowd)" "(sirens blaring)" " She came 'cause she was having a threesome with my flatmate Nick and his girlfriend." " Really?" " Yeah." "And like we met her and there was just like screaming outside when we were walking." " And then when did?" " Yeah it was just like screaming from outside of the building, and we go inside and this like gazelle-looking woman come out and it's her." " Wow." " Yeah." " I like that." " Yeah." "That's how we met." " I wanna look like a gazelle." " Maybe you do." " Good." "But I feel more like a horse." " But you look more like a beautiful horse." " Okay'" "Schéne Pferde" " No, not in German." "(laughing)" " [Ezra] That blonde boy inside's pretty cute." " [Catherine] I thought you were over your leftist straight boy fetish." "(bright dance music)" "♪ You loved a nation" "♪ Declare your need" "♪ You sweep my floor" "♪ Love that you do" "(shouting in megaphone)" "(haunting music)" "(thunder rumbling)" " So." "Tell me more about Africa." " I lived there until I was 10 and I had my own horse and I had my own little cheetah." " Really?" "You had a cheetah?" " Yes, and it stayed with us." " Hey Sasha." " Hi." " How's it going?" " I'm drinking with a friend." "Let's talk later." " Okay'" " So, you want to go?" " [Man] Yes, let's do it." "A beer, please." "♪ It's all still there" "♪ Where goes the night" "♪ Our summers" "♪ Play on repeat" "♪ Where goes the night" "♪ In stealth" "♪ Stands a kiss" "♪ From an ancient time" "♪ The conquers gone unseen" " So you're still here?" " Yeah, I was waiting for you." " I'm working." " Can we talk?" " What do you want to talk?" "I'm working." "Okay look I can be done in a couple hours." "Will you still be around?" " Yeah, I can come back." " [Sasha] The guys at the bar can't know." " [Ezra] What are you talking about?" " Look if we are going to be friends you cannot come to my work." "You understand?" " Okay'" " My friend kicked me out of his house." " So where are you staying?" " The hotel." " [Ezra] And how are you affording that?" " Work more." " If you want you could just go to my house and pass out or whatever, listen to music." " Okay'" "I'm tired." "(Skype ringing)" "Hey Mama (Arabic), hey Papa (Hebrew)!" "Hi Ezra!" " How are you (Arabic)?" " Good, everything's good, it's good to see you guys." "(Hebrew:) How's Berlin?" " Loads of fun." "Good." "How about girls?" "Are they as pretty as ours?" "(Arabic:) Are you all right?" "Are you eating?" "You look thin." " Mom, you have nothing to worry about." "(Arabic:) We'll come visit." " Yeah, I think a visit's like a really good idea, you guys'll have a really great time here." "But right now I actually have to go, it's really good to see you guys." "Okay?" "Do you need money?" "Bye." "(chuckles)" " Your parents sound nice." "(mellow electronic music)" " Did you hear that some neo Nazis raided QB?" " Bastards." "Are they okay?" " Those classless brutes should have some respect for Berlin culture." " I hope that all the dykes kicked the shit out of them." " Since when did all these Scandinavian artsy types become so gay?" "And they must have come along with all the British" "Pferde, right Conner?" " I'm not even British, Catherine." " So why did you move to Berlin?" " Because you know at the end of Liquid Sky the movie the two lesbians ditch Manhattan for Berlin." "Otto knows what I'm talking about." " Ezra, don't you think we already have too many Canadians in town?" " I like the Canadians." " What's your background?" " My mom's from Palestine, my dad's an Israeli German Jew." " You decided to come to Germany instead of go to the Middle East?" " He wanted to indulge in his white roots." "Not his brown ones." "Right, who can explain the term" ""Falsche Freunde"?" "Perhaps it's a friend who's not really nice to you?" "Not bad, you're getting there." "It's more a friend, who's outwardly nice, but as soon as you turn round, he'd spread rumours." "Similar to the term:" "A wolf in sheep's clothing." "Anyone heard it before?" " Thank you." " You okay?" " Yeah." "It's my friend." "He won't let me come pick my things." " Why not?" " I don't know, he is mad." " Wanna go get something to eat?" " I don't have any money." "You don't have to go to work all week?" " No." "(upbeat music)" "(laughing)" "(chattering)" "Weird party, where's everyone coming from?" "" Mo?" " Mole." " Mole!" " Mole McHenry, yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah." " Oh my god I will never be able to adopt an Asian child." " I don't know, some people, I just don't get their vibe." "And it's kinda a creepy vibe." "And it happens once every 20 people." "And it's not about how they look." " Is that Ezra's?" " Yeah." " Yeah." " 'Cause we need an office space but we can't find an office space 'cause no one has an office job." " No, she was really nice, she's funny." "She's got a kind of..." " Yeah." " Biting way about her." " I'm Jayne, I'm Catherine's girlfriend." " Hi." " Hi." "It's more Catherine's friends, I mean there's some people and girlfriends and stuff but I don't know." " I'm really glad I can't speak German sometimes." "(laughing)" "♪ Do you think about me when you fuck her" "(laughing)" " I love the way she says that though, when ya fuck her." "How does this guy fuck her?" "He fucks her." "I fuck her." "Fuck her." "(playful shouting)" " Don't be upset, don't be upset, don't be upset, don't be upset!" "I love you, I love you!" " [Jayne] You'll wanna be here with everybody and you'll stay all night and you'll end up really shitfaced..." " [Catherine] No." " And then be like no get to me 'cause I can't even have sex with you 'cause you're totally unconscious." "(playful shouting)" "(singing)" " It's a shame Berlin's tearing down all its beautiful Nazi architecture, don't you think?" "(upbeat music)" "♪ Meanwhile in Berlin" "♪ Meanwhile in Berlin" "♪ Meanwhile in Berlin" "♪ Meanwhile in Berlin" " Who is this new guy?" "Do you like him?" " I don't know." " He is German?" " [Sasha] American." " On vacation?" " No, he lives here." " [Alexander] He studies?" " No." " Works?" " No, not really." " So why did he move here?" " I don't know." "He likes here." " I never knew any Americans to move to Europe." "I think all the people want to go to America." "Maybe something is wrong with him." "(funky music)" "♪ Is it so hard to understand" "♪ Once I was a woman" "♪ Now I am your man" "♪ What is so hard to comprehend" "♪ What mother nature gave me" "♪ I gave back again" "♪ Don't be so juvenile" "♪ The choice here lover dear" "♪ Was never yours it's mine" "♪ The fact of the fiction is this" "♪ I won't wear the body if the body doesn't fit" " Do you know Gloria Vagra?" "She's great." "A little bit over the top, but aren't we all?" "Have you ever thought about doing drag?" " Yes, I did." " But have you ever actually done it?" " No, not yet." "But I'm only here a few months." " Well I love drag." "My favorite is Candy Darling, oh god, she's fabulous." "I mean, she's this Andy Warhol superstar, glamorous, but I would actually refer to her being a real woman than a drag queen." " Really, you've thought about doing drag?" " Yes." "Sometimes I feel like a woman." " [Ezra] What did you mean when you said you felt like a woman?" " [Sasha] I don't know." "I just never really feel like a man, you know?" "But what can I do?" " [Ezra] Are you trans?" " [Sasha] I don't know." "Human spirit is complicated, no?" "(thumping dance music)" "♪ Take it away" "♪ What you used to know, know, know" "♪ I have seen" " Is your friend one of those women you were talking about?" " What women?" " The trans woman." " Mika?" "Yeah, she is." "You enjoying the show?" " Yes." "I didn't know people like this exist." " Like who?" " Like Mika." " Yeah?" " I had dreams where I look like her." "She's great." " And I've had dreams where I sleep with boys like you." "You don't really want to sleep with me, do you?" " I do." "I'm sorry, it's just the last couple of weeks have been so confusing." "(moaning)" "Piss off!" " Three euro." "Thank you." " Ooh, they look lovely." "I think I'll take, no no no no, no." " Maybe this one?" " [Old Man] I'll take a pink one." " [Clerk] Okay." " [Old Man] Okay." " Thank you." " I'm trying to sell the film rights on your book." "It's very, very difficult but possibly we are lucky." "It will be a lot of money." " I can imagine someone like Greg Araki directing it." " Yeah, we'll see, you know, but first you have to write the book." "I hear you are all over the sex clubs and don't write." " I am writing, and I'll have something for you in two weeks." "I'm working on this story, it's really good, it's about falling in love with a character that's trans." " Transvestite?" " Transgender." " That's not commercial, you know." "I think what's commercial is I have an idea." "I just read in the newspaper there is a gay penguin couple who stole an egg from a heterosexual couple and old people like to see these kind of films." "But first you have to write the book." "Get up very early in the morning, I mean good writers get up at four o'clock in the morning, write until late evening, and don't sleep, you know." "In Germany we need discipline." "(upbeat electronic dance music)" " Sorry, we are in line." " Yeah, and you still are, don't worry." " Uh, aren't you a little old for this?" "Shouldn't you be at a dinner party?" "Or in bed?" " You're my dinner." "I'm gonna poke my heels through that Araki eye socket if he says another word." " So what do you want?" " I'll just take some MDMA." " Okay, sure." "Oh wait, I think I only got pills, is that okay?" " Yeah, we'll take two." " Okay'" " Oh, I mean they're super strong so I would say like one is probably enough, definitely enough for two like if you split it." " Okay'" "We'll take one then." " Oh, do you want mushrooms, too?" " No thanks." " Okay, hey, then take this one, that's a present from me." "I loved your last book, by the way, it was so." "Like I got a copy from my ex." "What was it called?" "Mainstream..." " Rigor and contempt." " Yeah, exactly, yeah." "(thumping electronic dance music)" " You're quite amazing." " You interested?" " Yeah." "(singing in German)" " Anything is possible." "(giggling)" "(beeping)" "There singing aloud and whatever." "I'm a bit drunk." "So I was walking along and stopped to buy some cigs." "So I was walking along and stopped to buy some cigs." "The salesman didn't like me, and he literally kicked me out on the street." "And as I stumbled, this woman and her 5 pugs walks by." "And I landed on two of them and accidentally killed them." "And she screamed for the police!" "So I fled in here." "Now I'm desperate for some love and affection!" "You like this?" " Of course I do." "Beautiful." "I love your skin!" "Is it real?" "Amazing!" "I love your pretty tits, as long as they're real." "I love your pretty tits, as long as they're real." "Would you like me to touch them?" " Yeah." "Does it feel nice?" "Are you into muscles?" " Of course, yes." "And I love your obscene smile!" "You're so sexy!" "We're neglecting your sweet little friend over here." "You're hot, you sluts!" "Give me a kiss!" "You're so hot, you sluts!" "(beeping)" " Sasha?" " Hi." " Oh my god, you look great!" " Thank you." " I didn't know you do drag." " Well it's the first time." " Let's celebrate." " Yes, this Sasha, he know it is time." "And you!" "Don't you cheat on me!" " Cheers, darling." "Cheers." " Cheers." "Look me deep in the eye..." " You know, let's have some white wine like classy lady." " Yes." " Bartender, can we have two white wines please?" "Thank you." " Thank you." " Cheers, darling." " Cheers." "(oohing)" " Oh my god, I love you." "Polish nails." "You know, my first time I have this beautiful red, but this red lipstick was so intensive I am still" "washing out the stains." "Out of my dress." " [Sasha] So sometimes you go out not in drag." " [Sasha] So sometimes you go out not in drag." " Sasha, look at me, and look at him." "Can you believe that I will be like him?" "Never, never, never." "It's my biggest fear." "It's my biggest fear." "Cheers." " Cheers." " Bartender, do we have keys for the ladies' room?" " And you will spend a lot of money on makeup." " Yes." " Come take a seat." " Come take a seat." "How are you?" " I am good, and you?" " Okay'" "You like sausages?" " No, thank you." "I don't know how long I will be working here." "I am maybe talking to a lawyer about getting a visa." " What's wrong with working here?" " Nothing." " Nothing." " It's good money." " Yes, sorry." " What's your problem?" " It's okay." " Yeah." " Can I have some?" " Yeah." "How did you meet her?" "How did you meet her?" "' Who?" " Maxime." " Him?" "He's a boy." "We met when I was fucking a go-go dancer in the back." " How long have you guys been together?" " How long have you guys been together?" " Two years." "We live together, but I'm not gay." " You are not gay?" " I'm not a faggot." "I love Lukas." "He is the best thing that has happened to me." "There was this woman before." "She even bought me a car." "She even bought me a car." "But I left her, I came to Berlin." "Then here I met him." "You know, sometimes it's hard to live together with someone, to share everything-." "With someone, to share everything-." "He is a mess." "He won't cook, won't clean, won't do shit at home." "I do all of it." "I make it nice for us, I take care of everything." "But it's worth it." "But it's worth it." "Makes me happy in the morning to wake up by his side." "(dreamy music)" "(slaps)" "(bird sawing)" " Hello." "(speaking foreign language)" "(speaking foreign language)" " Can you give me some advice?" " Somebody on the street will ask you," ""But you are a man!" ""Why do you dress like that?"" "Then they always say well I'm in the same" "(speaking foreign language)." "(speaking foreign language)." "♪ Don't be a bitter lemon" "♪ Be sweet like tutti frutti" "♪ Don't be a sour dinky" "♪ Be darling and kinky" "♪ You shouldn't believe everything that you hear" "♪ Singing louder is what they fear" "♪ Singing louder is what they fear" "♪ You shouldn't be to trusting" "♪ Those who are disgusting" "♪ Lying to your face" "♪ What a disgrace" "God gave me the authority to give you a most amazing future." "Tee hee hee." " Do you think I should..." " You were ready the moment you were born." "♪ Oh yeah this train" "♪ Don't carry no control freaks" "♪ No freaky geeky homo oohing fruitcakes" "♪ No freaky geeky homo oohing fruitcakes" "♪ 'Cause this train is bound for glory" "♪ This train, choo choo" "(dreamy music)" " These are my friends." " Hello." " Hello." " Hi." " [All] Hi, welcome." " [All] Hi, welcome." " Cheers darling, you look fabulous." "(glasses clinking)" " The trans mitzvah." " To Sasha." " [All] To Sasha!" " I guess the best experience I had in my transition was I once had a friend who made a picture of me was I once had a friend who made a picture of me and showed it to me, just like a normal friend" "would show you a picture, and was the first time in my life when I was able to see my face and see that finally it was me." "And it's very difficult to describe that after 20 something years or let's say 18, (laughing) you were not able to recognize 100% yourself" "from your face, which I did this time." "So it took me 20 something years to realize that I was this person." "That I exist." " Since people started to see me as a male person" "I could finally live the way I wanted to and finally have sex the way I wanted to because before it was like for me being put in this position of being a woman, having sex with men, it was just awkward." " I've always been a woman." "The thing is that people think I'd be a man 'cause I'm such a butch." " Exactly." "(laughing)" " And I look like a boy a bit." "But I've always been a woman, I didn't know it earlier, and I really thought I'd be a man and I lived like that." " Trans women friends always told me guys like me don't exist, there's only them, but one day" "I found out about hormones." " Oh." "(laughing)" " Speaking of hormones." "(laughing)" "Some of us don't even have them anymore." " An older brother and I was like he's got something in between his legs which would grow probably a little bit later to me as well and I was laying in bed like, dear god, and tomorrow I'm gonna have a penis." "And this is how I actually thought it works, to be." " Just pray enough." " Yeah." " Pray hard enough and you become what you really are." " Every day is a fight but not just for us, for everybody living life is a fight." "So you don't have to be trans or something in between to fight." " Some people, when I say I'm trans they don't believe it." "I got to get naked or to show my scars." "So by getting naked on stage it's a way to show people that there are a lot of different bodies and gender and that I am one of them and that they would have not known if I would not" "have shown that so it's like a way for me to be really myself and at the same time playing a character so it's really fun." "You should really do that." " Yes, totally." " Okay, we perform together." "(laughing)" " And sometimes we have also sex on stage and yeah it's fun and cool, you have to try it out." " Nothing you can do but just follow your dreams." "(cheering)" "(pulsing electronic dance music)" "(singing in German)" "♪ Either way the guys get outta hand" "(cheering)" "♪ But that just passes by" "(cheering)" " I loved it, thank you." " Here she is." "." "Hey" " Oh hey." "Yeah, right on, kid." "(dreamy music)" " [Woman] Often cultural capital comes from economic capital." "One thing transforms into the other." " [Sasha] I like writing these poems and pictures." "Sometimes they are songs." " [Ezra] You're a hustler, you're a problem." "And in Russia?" " [Sasha] In my hometown living with my mother." "Sometimes I feel like a woman." "I don't know." "Humans just very complicated." " [Man] Actually, think he came out as trans." "(speaking foreign language)" " [Woman] My parents took it harder when I came out as an artist than when I came out as queer." " [Woman] Are you nervous?" "It's gonna be okay." " Let's just do one more, yeah?" "(cheery piano music)" "Fuck." "This feels really weird to me in here." " Why?" "You think he's gonna bomb?" " I hope not." "(singing in German)" " Hurry up, you're gonna miss him." "(sniffing)" "You have some cum on your face." "Give that to me." "This place is fucking so small." "(sniffing)" "(applauding)" " Is that applause?" "Did we miss it?" " Don't worry, there's gonna be an encore." "Let's go." "(upbeat electronic music)" "." "Hey" " Hi." " Good to see you." " You too." "How was it?" " It was good." "Did you miss?" " Yeah, I just ran and got a coffee." "(speaking foreign language)" " Oh, you got a coffee." " I should have gotten you one, I'm sorry." " No, it's fine, I'm okay." "Thank you." "I see an old friend of mine over there." "I think I will just go and say hi, is it okay?" " Okay, yeah, we can just meet later." " Okay, it's good." " Bye." "' BYE bye." "(dreamy music)" "Hey, Alexander." " Sasha." "." "Hey" "." "Hey" "How is it going?" " Good." " Come, take a seat." " How are you?" " Yeah, fine." "Bad guys have more fun." " Yes." " And, what do you make here?" " I was in a meeting." " Yeah?" " Yes." " What's that called again?" " DOM." " DOM." " Yeah." "They are very good." " Yeah yeah." "The gay Russian community in Germany." " Yeah, you should come." " Yeah, it's wonderful." "But sorry, not for me." " Yeah I was thinking of going to Moscow, help with the gay pride parade." " Are you crazy?" "They will fuck you up over there." "Sasha, you were lucky enough to make it here, why the hell would you go back?" " It's important." " Ah, this is crazy." " I have to." " Come get changed and let's go for a drink, I pay." " Changed?" " Yeah." " Thanks, I'm fine." "Say hi to Maxime." " Would you love me more if I bought an apartment?" "A fancy apartment?" " We'll see." " What do you mean, we'll see?" "What about if it had like a moving camera butler." " Be firm in affairs of the heart." "Don't let the past distract the present." "This is an excellent time to start a new love affair, new vows, or to relocate." "So what could relocation mean like?" " Have you guys been to Paris?" "You would love it, all the cupcakes... (laughing)" " It's a romantic city but I wish I spoke French," "I don't speak French at all so I was like "Bonjour, " and they look at me and they're like, "Hello."" "(laughing)" "Like am I that American?" "Apparently so." " I was going to go to Ibiza when I was DJing." " Yeah, I love Spain." "Any excuse to go to Ibiza, any excuse to go to Spain," "I'm there." "(laughing)" " Cupcakes and men." " The tea is pink, it matches the cupcakes, you're insane." "That is incredible." " It's sinful, you know, all these hip openers." " Hips, hips." "(laughing)" "I mean I love cupcakes and yoga." "(laughing)" "This is my life." " [Woman] Well you do yoga so you can eat the cupcakes." " As much as I love sex, I love food more, sorry." "(laughing)" " I'm sorry but at what time should we go?" " Oh, yeah, we should probably" " I think we." " [Jayne] I'm sorry, we gotta go." "Thank you so much for the lovely (mumbles)." " [Sasha] Oh, thank you so much." " Is this one of the mango ones?" "It's like orange." " [Woman] You both got mango." " Thank you so much." " Ciao!" " Cheers!" " [Host] God, they are so cute together, don't you think?" " [Woman] Are they together, together?" " I don't know." " [Woman] What's his name now?" " [Woman] Well I hope so because Catherine was such a bitch." " I know." "I think so too!" "Think they're having sex now?" " Like now?" " That would be so hot." "(laughing)" "An is Dead" "Number 281" "As a transvestite, you'd always find work." "Here in Berlin." " Instead he arrived here, overstayed his visa, and now it's impossible for me to give him permission to stay here any longer." " I mean, can you help us?" "Is there something we can do to fix this?" " The question is what should you have done before." "I mean you cannot just arrive in a foreign country and..." " There's gotta be something that you can do for us." " I'm sorry." "He should have thought about it earlier." "What can I do?" " [Jayne] Okay." " [Official] Good luck." "(laughing)" "" No!" " Oh, wait a second, wait a second." "I heard about this." "Do YOU guys want to go?" " Mentor to Young Perverts." " Oh, I know this guy." "He moved to Berlin a couple of years ago and in this particular book he mentioned everybody that he met that he knew and put us all down." "He exploits us all." "And I do not want to be part of that." "I don't think we should grace him with our presence." " Yeah, I don't think so." "(laughing)" " It's a great jacket." " Oh, thank you." " Where'd you get that jacket?" " Actually my sister gave it to me." " Your sister." " She stayed in Berlin?" " My sister." "No, she was here visiting." " 'Cause this is kinda old school Berlin." "This wasn't like she was here like a year ago, right?" " She didn't buy this in Berlin, in London." " Can't believe no one showed up." "The publishers did such a crap job at promoting this event." "They must have something against me." "Racist bitches." " Can you just enjoy yourself?" "You're like a little nervous chihuahua." "You're such a drama queen." " I'd rather be a drama queen then a doll." " Did you read that New York 'Times article about Berlin?" " [Man] Yes, and it's true, Berlin, it's dead, it's over." "It's not happening anymore." " [Man] It's not what it used to be." " Detroit, New Orleans." " I'm gonna buy a house in Bucharest." "I think the idea of wild dogs roaming around the streets is very romantic." " It is romantic." " Yeah." " I can see it." " Sasha." " Ezra." "Hi." "Congratulations on your new book." " [Ezra] Thanks." " You look different." " Yeah?" "I could hardly recognize you." "Where are you going?" " [Sasha] Just having a walk." " Can I come with?" " Sure." "(haunting music)" " Do you wanna stop and smoke a cigarette?" " Sure." "Thanks, I'm fine." " You were never attracted to me, were you?" "You were using me." " Ezra." "I liked you." " It's okay, it's fine." " Ezra." "Ezra, stop it!" "(phone rings)" " Hello." " Hey, Sasha, I got an advance on my book." "Can I take you out to dinner?" "(speaking German) No." "Who is this?" "Jayne?" " Ezra." " Yeah, are you with Sasha?" " No, Sasha's not here." "She had to go back to Russia." " But." " Please don't ever call here again." "Twat." "(phone ringing)" " Hi." " Hey Cat." "Wanna go out for some bloody Times?" " Maybe just one." " [Ezra] Okay, I'm coming by." " [Woman] And maybe I can access you." "Your birth, your youth, your motherhood, your old age, your death." "I'm ripe to access you entirely." "(laughing)" "♪ And I told you not to come" "♪ And I told you not to come" "♪ And I told you" "♪ And I told you not to come" "♪ I told you not to come" "♪ I told you" "(bright electronic music)" "♪ In my nightlife" "♪ I don't think twice" "♪ Everything is so nice" "♪ Loving the luxury of the nightlife" "♪ Everything is alright" "♪ Blinded by the headlights" "♪ Driving past midnight" "♪ Looks like a still life" "♪ Give me something cheap" "♪ Not enough sleep" "♪ Which one do I keep" "♪ You are my nightlife" "n Nightlight" "♪ Bright light" "♪ Hold tight" "♪ Turn right" "♪ Turn left" "♪ Like death" "♪ Bright light n Nightlight" "♪ In my nightlife I don't think twice" "♪ Everything is so nice" "♪ Loving the luxury of the nightlife" "♪ Everything is alright" "♪ Blinded by the headlights" "♪ Driving past midnight" "♪ Looks like a still life" "♪ Give me something cheap" "♪ Not enough sleep" "♪ Which one do I keep" "♪ You are my nightlife" "♪ In my nightlife" "♪ I don't think twice" "♪ Everything is so nice" "♪ Loving the luxury of the nightlife" "♪ Everything is alright" "♪ Blinded by the headlights" "♪ Driving past midnight" "♪ Looks like a still life" "♪ Give me something cheap" "♪ Not enough sleep" "♪ Which one do I keep" "♪ You are my nightlife" "translation:" "Jérg von Stein subtitles:" "alias film + sprachtransfer GmbH"