"ALMOST NOTHING" "This is it, I've left." "I'm on the train." "It feels weird going back there." "I'm doing what you said." "You coming?" "Was it good today?" " Yeah." "Is mom sleeping?" " Keep quiet." "She had trouble falling asleep." "Come on!" "Just try to relax." "Breathe, breathe, breathe." "Everything's fine." "The tube is going in." "Swallow your saliva." "One hard swallow." "Calm down, sir." "Everything's fine." "Breathe." "Calm down." "Breathe..." "Everything's fine." "Don't get upset." "Try to remain calm." "Breathe!" "You're too tense." "Please breathe, sir." "Breathe!" "You're not helping..." "Breathe." "You must stay calm." "Here, Mathieu, put it under your arm." "Like that." "You haven't eaten anything!" "That's not good." "You need your strength." "You did take your tranquilizers?" "Mathieu Lambert's fiberscope?" "It was hard, but I think we got it." "I'll see him this afternoon." "Then we'll discuss treatment." "OK." " See you later." "How do you feel, Mathieu?" "Were the tests all right this morning?" "It would be good if we talked, don't you think?" "You don't want to talk?" "Fine." "Let me tel you what's going to happen." "If you want, only if you agree to it, you can stay here for eight days." "That's the usual procedure, when people come to the hospital." "We try to keep them for eight days, to find out what's wrong." "See what made you do what you did... and try to find some answers." "I'm a psychiatrist, I'm here to help you." "You are safe here." "You can get yourself together." "Do you want to let anyone know you're here?" "Your parents, maybe?" "You know the person who brought you here yesterday?" "He's been here twice today, asking about you." "Is he a friend?" "Is he your boyfriend?" "Cédric." "Mathieu." " Nice to meet you." "You on vacation long here?" "I don't know." "A while." "What's so funny?" "You." " Me?" "I make you laugh?" " You do." "Why?" " I didn't picture you like this." "Like how?" "I saw you last year." "You've really changed." "I've seen you, too." "You sold waffles in that van?" "I still do, but at Pingolo's." "Know where it is?" "Pingolo's?" " Yeah." "I don't think so." "Got friends here?" "Not really." "Want one?" "A friend?" " Yeah, a friend." "You, for example?" "Me, for example." "Sure, why not?" "Did you mind me looking at you on the beach?" "No." "I looked at you, too." "Yeah, I noticed." "Why?" "Because you were looking at me." "The girl's your sister?" " Yes." "You look alike." "Really!" "You didn't look closely enough." "Maybe you had better things to do." "Here, right now, I don't know if I could..." "But yesterday on the beach, you felt something?" "I'm not saying I didn't, but..." "I don't know, maybe you're right." "I'd better leave, then." "Wait, isn't it normal?" "What do you propose?" "What do I propose, right now?" "I want to kiss you." "Go ahead." "Just getting in now?" " I went for a walk." "At three in the morning!" "What's wrong?" "The pills make you sick, that's all..." "Feel good?" "What are you waiting for?" "What did you say?" "Nothing." "Hey, Mathieu." "Please go away." "Why?" "So they don't see us together." "Are you ashamed or what?" "No, I just don't want any trouble!" "What trouble?" "Can't you just leave?" "You think I'm stupid?" " Just fuck off!" "What, fuck off?" "Who's he talking to?" "One of Mouchereau's sons?" "Must be." "What are they up to?" "Well..." "I'm going." "I'm baking out here." "I've got lots to do at home." "I'll take the car, you'll walk, OK?" "Yeah." "You'll come back in an hour?" "Yes." "Sarah, I'm not your maid." "You can help." "Why don't you ask Mathieu?" "He's too lazy." "Sure, that's some excuse." "I'm lazy too, then." "There are so many people on that beach." "Even at low tide, it's packed." "Don't be dumb, it's always the same!" "Don't talk to me like that!" "My allergies are starting, shit." "I won't go back." "I'm sick of the beach anyway." "You're not supposed to go everyday..." "You piss me off!" "Why aren't you eating?" " I'm not hungry." "I bust my ass to feed you!" "I'm going to my room." "Let him go, his ass hurts." " Mathieu, wait!" "Excuse me, is Cédric here?" "No, he left." "A long time ago?" "About two hours." "What do you want?" "To apologize for this afternoon." "OK, you can fuck off now." "Cut it out." "Hey, I said I'm sorry!" "Come on..." "Come on, kiss me." "Don't ever do it again!" "You hear me?" "Ashes from the moon, little ball of foam, the wind carries me, the hot sand buries me." "Between my dunes lie my misfortunes." "When I'm nude, I learn virtue!" "I, I, I'm so fragile!" "Someone take my hand..." "That's pathetic." "I, I, I'm so easy, I fuck anyone who wants me!" "We'll have to be careful next time, or my sister'll flip." "She doesn't seem too cool." "She's a real bitch these days." "Carried by the wind, I fuck you up the ass" "My ass is afraid to be pricked by your big bad dick!" "Naked, I take it up the ass." "I, I, I'm a libertine, I'm a whore..." "A naughty girl..." "Her ass is nice and hairy the way I like it!" "Kitty!" "Where did you come from?" "Shit!" "Hey, get down." "Here." "You're cute, but you stink." "Here, You little pig!" "It's good, huh?" "Well, I'm here." "I'm sitting by the fire." "It's so cold here." "I saw the neighbor." "She gave me the wood." "I hope she won't call here." "It's freezing!" "I'd Iike you to come one weekend," "I could show you the place." "I think you'd Iike it." "Don't know what I'll do this week." "Today I found a cat." "He was in the yard." "He's sleeping now." "Here." "Thanks, dear, but I prefer orange juice." "Feeling better?" "Not really." "Those pills make you sick." "You should stop." "Don't worry, it won't last." "Shit!" "Oh, fuck!" "seriously." "You want a light!" "Excuse me." "Give it to me." "No, I'll light it." "That's what it's for." "I'm so full..." "Fuck, I'm fat." "It's awful." "You, too?" " Totally." "Welcome to the club." " You've gained?" "A little." " No way!" "Your food's so rich." " It's so rich!" "Right!" "It's not only disgusting, it also makes you fat." "I can't cook." "Is it really too salty?" "It's salty." " I like salt." "The food is already salted, so there's no point adding to it." "Yeah, but I like it that way." "Like it?" "You garbage disposal!" "I like salt!" "Salt, and pepper." "I like spices." "Here's Annick trying to justify her cooking." "I didn't make it!" "I bought it." "I couldn't make that cake." "She got it at the bakery." " I just got the wrong bakery!" "You would!" " Which one?" "Get off my back!" " Which bakery?" "The one next to the bar..." "That's not the good one." "So I was wrong." " Change bakeries." "You're all horrible." " No, we love you, Annick." "Be careful." "Two with sugar?" "Thanks, have a nice day." "This game's a drag." " Come on, play!" "One last round." "Three of a kind." "If you get four, I'll suck your dick." "And if not?" " Just your balls, then!" "Your dad may come next weekend." "Let him stay in Paris." " Why?" "He doesn't take care of her." "He's like all men." "A coward, afraid of illness." "Why defend him?" "He's isn't nice to you." "I don't care what he says." "As long as he needs me, I'm stronger." "That's how it works with him." "Why aren't you at the beach with Sarah?" "I'm sick of her!" "Maybe you've met a girl." " No." "Re-do it." "It's sloppy." " No, it's OK." "Fuck!" "I don't believe it..." "Shit!" "Mathieu, are you there?" "Why'd you lock the door?" "We were playing darts." "I forgot." "Aren't you going to introduce us?" "Cédric, Annick." "Where's your sister?" " I don't know." "The beach, I guess." "Come help me clean the kitchen." "You made a big mess!" "Now?" " Yes." "I can't do anything." "Want to eat with us, Cédric?" "She's doing better, but sometimes she breaks down." "She needs to stop the pills." "Just come!" "I know you're busy but Christ!" "I'm not judging you, but she needs you." "They fight all the time." "Want to talk to him?" "Known each other long?" "About ten days." "We met at the beach." "You're from here?" " Yeah." "From Nantes, actually." "My dad lives here." "I'm on vacation." "Are you in school?" "No, I quit a Iong time ago." "It's not my thing." "On the dole, then?" " No, why?" "I start a training course in September." "The pay's bad, but I'II learn a trade." "Is it mechanics?" "No, I'm not a mechanic." " You look like one though." "I'm just kidding!" "It's computers." " Ah, computers." "A friend in Paris does news graphics." "Yeah?" "I've always loved that." "I don't know anything about it!" "I should dress." "I can't go down like this." "Wearthe sweater Sarah and I gave you." "If you Iike." "It's in the closet." "Dad called." "He can't come, he has to go to Frankfort." "Did you hear me?" " Yes." "You don't care?" "No." "But you know, he works a Iot." "He doesn't give a shit about us." "You're wrong." "He's doing the best he can." "So, it's OK he left you afterwhat happened?" "Good evening." "Cédric, my mom." " Nice to meet you." "Like some wine?" "I'd Iike a little." "If Annick doesn't mind?" " Annick doesn't mind." "But not too much!" "Thanks." "Is it good?" "A bit off." " Yeah, it is." "So you're Mathieu's new friend?" "That's for sure!" "would you get the starters?" "Are you in school?" " Not exactly." "I sell waffles." "really?" "Have you been doing it long?" " Three years." "So... what do you do in winter?" "Not much." "Just hang out." "I do sports, too." "It shows." "You're really built!" "You think so?" " Yes!" "You must be popular at the beach." "Trying to find out if he's free?" "We're too old for him!" "Too old!" "I think you look good for your age." "That's a good one!" "So, what's my age?" "I don't know." "I couldn't say." "Yes, you could!" " No, no." "How old is your girlfriend?" "She's..." " Eighteen!" "You know her?" "A little." "Mathieu really knows her!" " Shut up!" "Don't talk to your sister like that." "She should mind her business!" "I always wanted a sister." "It's not always great." "especially with these two." "Right, Sarah?" "So..." "Who wants some?" " salad, Cédric?" "Yes." "Some delicious salad!" "That's enough." "Thanks." "No more?" " No, thanks." "Sarah?" "I don't want any." "Want some quiche?" " Let her be." "I'm the only one who likes my food here!" "I'II have more." "Get out." " OK, we're going." "What assholes!" "They wouldn't throw him out." "Stop it." " Stop what?" "Shut up." "I'm sorry." "Come on, forget it." "Kiss me." "Fuck!" " What is it?" "He's looking all over for you." "Is he the one you slept with?" "Yeah." "He's why you left for Nantes?" "Yeah, but not just him." "Too much shit was going on." "What kind of shit?" "I don't want to talk about it." "tell me." "Sure you want to know?" " Yes, I want to know." "I tried it for money with some guys passing through." "Wasn't it disgusting?" "It depended on the guy." "One time was really awful." "The guy was a gay-basher." "He beat the crap out of me." "But that's all over now." "Why do you think he did it?" "I don't know." "ShouIdn't you tell me?" "It's hard to say, exactly." "I think it's a combination of things." "In any case, it's not about you." "So why the letter saying he wouldn't see me anymore?" "Depression doesn't leave much room for others." "But I couId help him." " Not if he doesn't want help." "For now, he needs to find himself." "On his own." "I don't get it, he seemed fine." "He may have felt the need to hide it from you." "Can I ask you a question?" "You don't have to answer." "Yes." "How were things between you?" "I mean, were there any sexual inhibitions?" "No, not really." "But this past month he hasn't wanted to." "He accused me of cheating." "It wasn't true?" " No..." "Just once, but it was nothing." "Otherwise, things were good?" " Yeah, fine." "We argued, Iike everybody." "And at night?" "Mathieu said he had trouble sleeping." "Mathieu, want to go for a ride?" "Right now?" "We're all alone." ""Today, Ranrouët shows us the evolution of military architecture." "It mixes styles from the 10th through the 17th centuries." "We can follow its transformations to a time when past principles and forms were abandoned."" "cool." "No, not here." " Why not?" "I'm not in the mood." " You mad?" "No, but you've got a one-track mind!" "Isn't that normal?" "Come on, stop it." "I don't like you Iike this." "Is it because of yesterday?" "I don't know." "We're here, can't you enjoy it?" "It's just a bunch of rocks!" "I want you." "I don't feel like it!" "I'II be late." "Don't lock the door." "Wait!" " What?" "You think I haven't figured it out?" "What do you mean?" "You know what I mean." "And you bring him here, on top of it." "You want to kill your mother?" "I'm not doing anything bad!" "Do what you want, it's your ass." "But you could stay for dinner sometimes." "But..." " Make an effort." "I can't." "He's waiting." "tell him you'II see him after dinner." "How are you?" "Fine, honey." "It goes too fast." " What?" "It goes too fast." "I didn't know she had a guy." "Neither did I." "Let's go." "I'm bored." "will your mom take it bad?" "I don't know." "She's not well, so I don't want to upset her." "She's sick?" " No, it's just..." "She had a baby 3 years ago, born with cancer." "They couldn't save him." "He's dead?" "We buried him recently." "My mom's been like this since." "We look after her." "mostly Annick does." "It doesn't seem to affect you." "I hardly knew him." "He was always at the hospital." "So?" "She hasn't paid much attention to us since." "Isn't that normal?" "I know, but... it's hell at home." "Between my crazy sister and my depressed mom, I've had enough." "They know you're gay?" "I didn't even know myself, before..." "Didn't you do stuff when you were little?" "Come on." "I undressed all my cousins!" "Bitch!" "You're so warm." "You like that." "6 francs a kilo." "Anything cheaper?" "I've got some at 5 francs a kilo." "I'II take a kilo." "Here you are." "Anything else?" "How much are the tomatoes?" "12 francs a kilo." "Excuse me." "I came about the ad." "Do you still need someone?" "I don't need a waiter, it's for cleaning." "I know, but I can do that too." "How old are you?" " I'm nineteen." "From around here?" " Pornichet." "There's a Iot of work." "Tons!" "That's alright." "I can do it." "It's so noisy!" "Are you at home?" "Yes, the window's open." "They're working in the street." "How's it going with Cédric?" "Fine." "As usual." "He's at work right now." "You sound funny." "Sure you're alright?" "Yes, I'm fine." "Good." "What else is going on?" "Not much." "I just wanted to see how you're doing." "I'm fine, dear." "still a little tired, but OK..." "When are you coming?" "We should introduce Cédric to your dad." "I already said I don't want to." "Cédric's not into families." "Whatever you say." "We'II see later." "I miss you." "I miss all of you." "I gotta go." "We don't have much money, but I'II call again." "Open up, Mathieu, I know you're in there." "Come on, damn it!" "Open up." "I know you're there." "Open the fucking door!" "Come on Mathieu, please!" "Looking for someone?" "When she walks by, she goes to the other side." "She doesn't even say hi!" "She pretends not to know him." "Or us." " We're not her friends anymore." "She finds you drunk every night." "That's not it." "She's mad at us." "I gotta go before they wake up." "Why aren't you saying anything?" "What do you want me to say?" "You sleeping with Cédric?" "Yes." "Isn't it gross?" "No." "Was he like that before?" "Yes." "Are you in love?" "The tree trunks turn you on?" "No, you do." "The little boy is buck naked!" "That dog's hungry." "I know a grotto." "It's hard to get to, but beautiful." "Want to see it?" "Yeah, but I can't get back too late, or I'II be in trouble." "I've been coming home late for a while now." "It's not very far." "I'II call you from down there." "Cédric, you down there?" "Fuck, where are you?" "You're waiting for Cédric?" "Yes." "I'm his father." "What's your name?" "Mathieu." "Do you know how he is?" "No." "I've been waiting 2 hours, they haven't told me." "Are you his boyfriend?" "Yes." "You're not from here?" "No." "I'm on vacation." "I'm from Paris." "Are you alright?" "What happened?" "I fell on the rocks." "At Korigans' Grotto." "You're pretty messed up." "Does it hurt?" " I'm alright." "May I sit down?" " Of course." "Not a great room, huh?" "Can you pick him up Monday?" "I'm working." "Yes, of course." "Don't worry." "well, goodbye." "See you soon, I hope." "We were on the rocks." "I waited for him at the hospital." "What happened?" "Nothing serious?" "No." "He was very lucky." "Thank God." "You could have called me." "I was so worried." "Mom, I have to tell you something." "What is it, honey?" "It's not easy." "I don't want to hurt you." "Why do you say that?" "You won't hurt me." "Go on, tell me." "I know you're sick and..." "Stop talking like I'm sick!" "It's true that sometimes, I'm a little down." "Go on, tell me." "I Iove Cédric." "I really love him, mom." "What about him?" "I think he loves me, too." "I feel it, anyway." "What about NathaIie?" "What, nathalie?" " Yes, nathalie." "Is that over?" " That was no big deal!" "really?" "I kind of suspected this." " What do you mean?" "The other day, in the hallway, I heard you." "You were in the middle of..." "Anyway." "See, I'm not that out of it!" "I never said you were." "At the hospital, your dad asked me if we were together." "I felt dumb, I didn't know what to say." "should've told him you were my girl!" "You jerk!" "To our marriage, then!" "Why didn't your mom come?" "My mother?" "She's a walking piece of shit." "She's in Rouen." "Haven't seen her in 15 years." "She nevertook care of me." "My parents divorced when I was one." "She's nevertried to contact me." "Can you believe that?" "Didn't your dad do anything?" "No." "What could he do?" "Has he remarried since?" "No." "He didn't want the trouble." "Women come and go, they never stay long." "He's with a real bitch right now." "That's why I Ieft." "And why'd you leave school?" "school's not my thing." "I dropped out nearthe end." "Want to go to my dad's tonight?" "He's at her place." "Oh, at his age..." "That's just it." "At his age, you faII in love." "already home?" "Yeah, why?" "No reason." "It's early for you." "Anything wrong?" " No, why?" "I don't know." "Why won't you take your pills?" "I want to stop." "We can Iowerthe doses, but it's risky to stop cold." "You don't think you need them?" "If I don't stop, I'II never know." "We'II stop them progressively." "What will you do there?" "I don't know, I'II see..." "I mostly want to rest." "Can you handle being all alone?" "I think so." "Anyway, I know people there." "What about Cédric?" "It's over for me." "Are you sure?" " Yes." "I feel like I need to be alone." "So you can think?" "No." "I don't want to think about anything now." "Later on, maybe." "The sea will be good for you." "Mathieu, I want to suggest something." "while you're there, I'd Iike you to keep a journal, write down your feelings." "I'm not into writing." "But maybe." "You'II be alright?" "I'm a little scared to leave the hospital." "The streets, people..." "That's normal." "But everything will be fine." "Hey, you alright?" "What's up?" "When are you leaving?" "For Paris?" " Yeah, for Paris." "In three or four days." "I want you to stay." "You hear me?" "I want you to stay with me." "So, it didn't mean anything?" "What can I do?" "Think I'II be waiting for you to call?" "I know you won't." "I expected more from you." "You know I can't, with my mother." "Fuck off!" "You make me sick." "Cédric starts a job soon." "In computers." "We'II live in Nantes." "What about you?" "Your studies?" "I'II just register at the University here." "It's the same difference." "Trust me." "How can I trust you?" "This is so sudden." "What if you don't get along with him?" "What if it doesn't work out?" "I'II finish the school year, then move back to Paris." "What about money?" "I'II find a job." "Where, on the streets?" "Why do you say that?" "Mom..." "He's not with you?" "Mom told me you're staying." "I'm going to Nantes with Cédric." "You're crazy!" "I don't want to talk about it." "You hardly know him." " So?" "Maybe in a week, you'II hate him." "You don't know anyone there." "That's my problem." "Did you tell NicoIas?" "No, I thought you could tell him." "I'II write him a letter, anyway." "Why, are you afraid?" "Just tell him." "Can't you do that?" "You're a coward." "But I can see why." "When he finds out you're a fag, he'II flip!" "Get lost!" "A pint, please." "Eat this." "Here." "Take it easy." "You're looking good." "You're my little Prince Charming." "hello." "Uh, is Pierre home?" "Pierre?" "Not at this hour." "He leaves work around four." "He'II be here soon then, it's quarterto." "Oh, yes!" "In this weather, it's hard to tell." "Want to wait for him?" "You don't mind?" " Not at all." "Have a seat." "would you Iike a coffee?" "It's cold out." "No, thanks." "I just had one an hour ago." "Do you mind if I keep ironing?" " No, go right ahead." "Have you known Pierre long?" "Two years." "We met two years ago." "Are you from Pornichet?" "No, I'm from Nantes." "But I've spent all my summers here, on vacation." "Do you work?" "Not yet." "I'm continuing my education." "What are you studying?" " Architecture." "That must be great, huh?" "I mean, I would think so." "Yeah, I Iike it." "You sure you don't want a coffee or something?" "OK, a coffee." "It's not strong, or I couldn't take it." "Pierre, there's a friend here for you." "What are you doing here?" "On vacation?" "No, not really." "In fact, I moved into my parents house." "What's going on?" "Nothing, I was just passing." "He's been waiting half an hour." "Want to take a walk?" " In this cold?" "It's OK, it's still daylight." "Got brothers and sisters?" " No." "My mom had a hard time having me." "WouIdn't you Iike your own place?" "And be all alone?" "I've got time." "My parents are cool." "I don't have the money." "My boss could fire me anytime." "I'd ratherwait." "Think I'm lame?" "Not at all." "You seem really together." "My friends all quit school to be independent." "End result: they're lost." "Didn't you quit school?" "Yes, but I worked right away." "I work in construction." "I'm a mason." "It's hard, but it's betterthan doing nothing." "What about you?" "We're only talking about me." "Why did you come here?" "I needed to get some air." "Did Cédric come with you?" " No." "Did you guys come this summer?" "Cédric didn't want to, because of my parents." "Can I ask you something?" "What happened between you two?" "You don't have to answer." "No, I don't mind." "I've nevertaIked to anyone about it." "At the time, I'd only been with girls." "Then I met Cédric." "That's it." "So what happened?" "I was with a girl, so it was hard." "I had to choose, and I chickened out." "Do you regret it now?" " No." "It wouldn't have lasted." "I wasn't ready." "So why do you guys always fight?" "It's complicated..." "Since it ended in a fucked-up way, we can't seem to help it." "It's been a year, year and a half?" " Yeah." "You've changed." "You're more..." "More what?" " I don't know." "Less of a kid." " really?" "Going back to Nantes?" " No, I'm not." "Anyway not now." "I think I'II spend the winter here." "How's school going?" "Fine." "I don't want to talk about me today." "I'm sorry, but..." "But I'm glad to see you." "It's good you came by." "Look at that kid." "What's he doing all alone?" "Look, that must be his dad." "Want to have dinnertonight?" " Sure." "I know a pizzeria nearby." " OK." "Are you still with Cédric?" "No." "Has it been long?" "No, not long." "Are you with anyone?" " You know, around here..." "You go to Nantes?" "Yeah, sometimes, but..." "I don't like the people there." "Here, doggy!" "Go on!" "Kick it!" "subtitles:" "Sionann O'NeiII"