"Let's not have people coming in, I'd like to do it without anybody in here." "Could everybody... split?" "I'd love to begin, thanks." " Maybe we can keep..." " And close the door." " Keep away from the door..." " All good?" "Yep." ""And never have I felt so deeply at one and the same time"" ""so detached from myself and so present in the world"" "Albert Camus." ""For Henry"" "I wasn't good in school," "I didn't care for school," "Um..." "It was nice socially, in my own experience, but..." "I kind of just went along." "I started off as a Music Major," "Gonna be a Rock'n Roll star..." "But that didn't quite worked out." "In 1985," "During the hurricane, hurricane Gloria," "I was walk..." "I was taking a train, into the city, to work" "I was..." "I'd gotten into work and I was on the phone with my brother-in-law, who... had just started teaching." "And he said that he was off from school." "Now Mike, wait a second," "You off from school for hurricane, and I... and I'm going to the city to...." "To work in an office building?" "It's a pretty good gig, right?" "My mother was a teacher" "And I knew without a shadow of a doubt, from my early childhood," "That the one job I would never do is become a teacher." "Never ever, I would take..." "toll cards on a turnpike," "I'll be a shepherd, anything, rather than become a teacher." "And I decided to be a teacher because I wanted to do something with my life," "Besides what I was doing, which was driving a truck, for a company, and um..." "And I decided I wanted to do a little bit better for myself, so I went into teaching a little bit, I went back to school," "And, at age of 37..." "A friend of mine from college," "His aunt was the..." "principal of an all-girls inner-city school in New-York, New Jersey." "And they were desperate for teachers," "So I thought "Great, I can do this for a year,"" ""it will keep my father for making me get a job at Prudential,"" ""and... then I'll figure out what I want to do."" "Well, they called me up and asked me for an interview" "And..." "I have to make out the job," "In a Junior High school in Queens" "And I ended up..." "Starting what..." "what's now my 30th year." "Most of the teachers here, at one point," "They believed," "That..." "they could make the difference" "I know how important it is to... have guidance, to have... someone help understand the complexities of the world that we live in." "I didn't really have that... growing up." "I am money," "I change hands like a dollar bill that's been robbed by a lamp" "Men and genie appeared in a cry of love with volume" "But the tears were all for myself" "And that's when it all went wrong" "* Phone ringing *" "* Beep *" "Hi, Lupe, its Dean Vargus here." "I'm sick and I won't be coming in today, alright?" "* Beep *" "Get to the point, Dr. Hart, I've got a school to run." "The state's score's gone down the last three years," "You're not delivering..." "Don't pretend like you don't know the game," "You earmarked my school for the worst kids in the district..." "These kids deserve an education, don't you agree?" "I agree." "You're jerking off on wasting my time." "Get to the point, Dr. Hart..." "We need consensus builders, a new methodology..." "You're corporatizing the system." "No, we're cleaning house." "The superintendent feels it's time you step down." "Babe, you got some fucking nerve coming into my yard with a heart fucking sell." "Carol, it was a time when you were an educator," "You were very well respected." "Why don't you go out on top?" "Allright." "Everybody sit down and shut up, or I start pulling out the referrals." "Sit." "Sit down." "I am starting the DVD." "I am starting the DVD." " Barth or Barthes" " Barth" "Mr. Barth, ma'am." "Mr. Barth, Henry Barth." "So you've taken long term assignments at..." ""Locke" and "McArthur"." "The "fringe"." "Well, that's where the works are." "This a month-long assignment, until I can fill it permanently." "I asked to meet with you because you come highly recommended as the best sub on the call sheet." "That's a somewhat dubious endorsement." "I agree, Mr. Barth." "You will find many of your students functioning well below the grade level." "That's your task to tray and get them caught up." "Teach the curriculum, most importantly." "Understood?" " Good morning." " Good morning." "I'm Mr. Barth," "Those of you who haven't heard, this is English 11A." "Listen up, I have one rule." "Just one." "If you don't wish to be here," "Don't come." "Dude, what does that mean?" "It's not dude, it's Mr. Barth." "The S is silent." " You're fucking gay" " Marcus, shut up!" "No, you shut up!" "You dike bitch!" "Hey Marcus, guess what?" "What?" "You're free to leave." " Like right now?" " Like right now." " A'right, yo..." " Catch you later, man!" "What's the fuck, do you want me to go to the Dean's Office?" "I don't care where you go." "Everyone, pull out a sheet of paper." "I would like to assess where your individual writing skills are..." "What if he got no paper?" "Okay, here is the situation:" "You're dead." "Alright, write a brief but detailed essay about..." "Hey jackass,..." "I asked you a fucking question!" "About what a friend or a parent might say about you during your funeral." " Okay?" "You have 30 minutes." " Oh shit..." "I asked you a motherfucking question, didn't I?" "Anything else?" "You'd better back the fuck up before I fucking rock your shit." "That bag..." "It doesn't have any feelings..." "It's empty." "I don't have any feeling you can hurt either." "Okay?" "I understand you're angry." "I used to be very angry too, okay." "I get it." "You have no reason to be angry with me, because..." "I am one the few people that's here trying to give you an opportunity." "Now I'm going to ask you to just sit down and do your best." "And I'll give you a piece of paper." "How's that?" "Can I get a fucking pen too?" "Kids don't have any attention span." "They're bored." "So how are you supposed to reel them in with classic literature if they don't..." "If they don't believe..." "that you... have something meaningful to share?" "Thank you." "Why did you threw Marcus out of class but not Jerry?" "Well I had to make an example out of somebody." "And Marcus verbally assaulted you and that's not allowed in my classroom." "What they say to me is immaterial." "What's your name?" "Meredith." "Nice to meet you, Meredith." "So you really don't care what the kid say to you?" "Perhaps I've gotten used to it." "I wish I could be that strong." "It doesn't take strength, Meredith." "You gotta... understand that unfortunately most of people lack self-awareness" "You should really keep that in mind as you head into the trenches of second period." "You're gonna meet them again, at every age." "I want to see the Principle!" "That's her, mom." "You're the bitch that expelled my baby?" "And for what?" " Excuse me, maybe you would like to..." " Because you can't handle it?" "Bitch why are you here?" "You want to be at home where I am every day?" "!" "I don't have time for this bullshit!" " Keep your voice down!" " Why are you here?" "Hey, Ma'am." "Calm down." "We'll go talk about this in the Dean's Office." "I ain't going nowhere with you" "Look, miss, I know you're angry... but they won't listen to you, you need to talk to me." " Racist bitch, I'm gonna sue your ass..." " Okay, come on, ladies..." "This way..." " Ladies,..." " What happened?" "Bitch, you give me any more shit in class and I'm getting my nigger's fucking gang rape your ass!" "Excuse me." "Are you new here?" "Yes, first day." "Welcome." "That was quite a scene back there." "I was a little stunned." "But it's actually safe here." "Sorry, I'm Miss Madison." "Henry, Henry Barthes." "Whatever is on my mind, I say it as I feel it" "I am truthful to myself." "I'm young" "And I'm old at the bottom of that soul" "So many times" "I am hardfaced, I am gone" "I am just like you" "Patricia?" "!" "Patricia Patricia" "Patricia" " Hello?" " Henry, it's Rita from the hospital." "He's done it again, you need to get down here." "Bastards, leave me alone!" "Why aren't you handling this?" "I can't get him out!" " You come and get him..." " Patricia?" "Thanks." "Grandpa, come on, it's Henry." "Open the door." "Patricia?" "No, it's Henry, it's Henry." " Who?" " It's Henry." "Grandpa, please, open..." "open the door..." "Oh, hi, sweetheart." "I thought that you were your mom." "You're dressed okay," "Were you going somewhere?" "Well I'm going to work." "You are retired." "You are retired, okay?" "It's very very late so I need you to go to sleep, okay?" "Let's go to bed." "How are you doing, huh?" "Some old people sleep a lot before they die." "Isn't that silly?" "Everything okay?" "You shut up!" "You listen." "I know you're just under-educated job" "Passing the time with these old dying people." "But I'm paying for his assisted living" "And you're not assisting him!" "I told you, take the lock off of his bathroom door!" "You know how he gets at night, he forgets" "So you need to be there for him." "To make him feel safe." "Let me be very clear here:" "You stop neglecting his needs" "Or I will start fucking with yours!" "I will have you fired!" "That is going to be your family," "Your children, are gonna be at risk!" "You got it?" "!" "Don't you ever make me come down here again at this hour," "Okay?" "Give me the fucking money!" "You heard me." "Give me the fucking money!" " What?" " Give me the fucking money now!" "You think I like you?" "Give me the fucking money!" " You want money?" " Now!" "Why are you following me?" "I'm not." "It's late, you should be home, it's a school night." "What?" "Are you crazy now?" " What the fuck is your deal, huh?" " Keep away from me." "Why'd you let the guy beat shit out of me?" "Huh?" "You just sat there, like a fucking lemon or something!" "Excuse me, I don't want to talk to you." "You don't think that there is something wrong with that?" "Listen," "Little kid, I don't know how old you were when it all went wrong." "But this isn't the fucking answer, okay." "Go figure it out, because you're gonna get really old, really quick." " You know that?" " Why are you so mean to me?" "Huh?" "You don't think that I have feelings?" "Do you?" "Do you have feelings?" "Listen, pa..." "I mean between you and me..." "You look like you got more problems than me." "Oh really?" "Yeah, really." "So, come on, I'll make it better." "What are you doing?" "Get off, please." "Nothing, I'm just offering to hang out if you want..." " I don't wanna hang out with you" " I don't know you seem kinda lonely," "Maybe we go back to your place, just... relax..." "You're afraid you'll like it?" "I'm afraid you've been fucked and thrown away so many times, you've gotten used to it." "Fuck you, man!" "Fuck off, queer." "Have a good night, yeah." "Yeah, yeah, just walk away?" "Hey?" "Where are you going?" ""He just fucks their shit up and..."" ""the ladies cried for me..."" ""at the funeral."" ""Because I ain't around no more to,"" ""to dick that split up..."" ""raw and shit..."" ""And my boys all get faded..."" ""Blazing that skunk shit and fuck."" "Tony V." "You know, it's funny:" "I spend a lot of time trying to not have to deal," "To not really commit." "I am a substitute teacher, there is no real responsibility to teach." "The responsibility is to maintain order, make sure nobody kills anybody in your classroom, and then they get to the next period." ""She used to be a sweet girl."" ""She never seemed dissatisfied with her life..."" ""and why should she have been?"" ""Her mother and I gave her everything she needed..."" ""So why did she become so angry,"" ""so miserable and mean all of a sudden?"" ""We don't know."" ""Frankly, it doesn't reflect on us."" ""We were good parents."" ""But still, she repaid us for all we've done"" ""by killing herself."" ""Stupid selfish child"" ""Now she'll never get into Princeton."" "No name." ""Hi, it's Dean Vargus again"" ""I can't do it anymore"" ""I..." "I quit!"" "Oh, if it isn't the lovely Dr. Parker!" "Would you like a happy pill to help you through the day?" "They're yummy." "I need you to fill in for Dean Vargus' second period." "I am worried about you, Charlie." "I just... really love watching you leave the room." "Haha, Mr. Seaboldt, he maintains a sense of humor." "I think the sense of humor is key, I don't possess it..." "I mean, I do... in a tragic sort of way" "Whatcha doing here, Mr. Sea?" "Um, filling in for Dean Vargus." "Vargus is a bitch!" "Talk shit, and you get slapped like a bitch." "You're not gonna give me no detention neither." "Or I'm gonna unfuck your shit uptight." "Motherfucker." "Un... shit..." "No, unfuck your shit uptight motherfucker." "Wow... that is, I mean really poetic." "I mean that's truly, what..." "lyrical." "You should take that on stage," "I mean that shit sells itself." "***" "I'm going to unfuck your shit, uptight, motherfucker." "I'll tell you ***" "I'll unfuck your shit uptight..." "I'll unfuck it right uptight, up your ass..." "You motherfucker!" "I am going to unfuck your shit, uptight, you motherfucker!" "I'll tell you what, um..." "Why don't you have a seat... okay, and then um..." "I'll be back shortly and we'll discuss your bright future." "Okay, my man?" "I mean, my motherfucker." "Okay, Mae West?" "Ellen, can I see your nipples?" "What?" "No!" "Wrong." "Actually, I can." "See, that's the whole point." "You have to wear bra to school." "Look, Mr. Seaboldt, I'm just being me." "I don't tell you how to dress, so you don't tell me." "Capisce?" "Ellen, you know what that is?" "It's a beautiful picture of a sunset in Hawaii." "It's really pretty, isn't it?" "Now, that one..." "Do you know what that is?" "That's a vagina infected with gonorrhea." "That's fucking gross!" "Yes, very." "So, you see, when you come to school dressed like that, you give... you give out the wrong signal." "Don't you want people to treat you with respect?" "Yo, I get respect." "I don't give it up to every dick in my face." "Every dick in your face." "That's respectful." "Put this on, wear that for the rest..." "I said, wear that for the rest of the day." "Okay?" "Can I go now?" "I suppose you can, I mean... if we're done." "Are we done?" " We're done." " We're done." "Another student saved..." "Come out of the bathroom, Grandma!" "Come on, grandma, open the door." "Hi Grandpa." "Grandpa." "Grandpa?" "You okay?" "What is it Grandpa?" "It's Henry, Grandpa." "Grandpa, it's Henry." " Who?" " Are you in pain?" "No, I..." "I pissed myself" "Come on grandma, open the door!" "Excuse me!" "Excuse me?" " Can you come in here, please?" " You had a little accident?" " Yeah..." " You should..." "See, we've taken care of it." "See?" "You're okay." "Alright?" "You doing any writing, Grandpa?" "Been doing writing?" "In the journals?" "No, my life..." "My life isn't worth memoirs..." "It's OK, it's okay..." "I didn't want to go... off like this." "I hate being a burden." "You're not a burden, okay?" "Not a burden." "Sure, knew you'd like coming here..." "Your mother came by, today." "Have you spoken to her lately?" "No." "Would you tell her I'm fine?" "You always say you're fine, but I know you hide things from me." "You've always been closed off." "Ever since you were an kid." "Why is that?" "Why?" "Ah... you're upset." "I shouldn't say these things to you..." " I don't mean to make you..." " You haven't upset me," "Grandpa" "Listen, I don't want to talk about the past." "You and I remember it very differently." "Just rest, okay?" "Close your eyes, I'm here." " I'll be here with you." " When you stop coming, Henry," "I'll die." "Fuck." "You got a smoke?" "No, I don't have a smoke." "Where did you go, huh?" " What are you gonna do now?" " What are you gonna do, kid?" "I don't know." "Can you lend me ten bucks?" "Come on, man." "I'm hungry." "I may have something to eat at my place." "Come in, wash your hands." "There's soap over there." "Sit down." "Real nice place you got." "Thanks." "You got anything stronger?" "Eat your sandwich." "Hey, hold on man!" "It's a hundred bucks." "Relax..." "What?" "Have you been raped recently?" "Why do you care?" "I'm not sure that I do but ***" "I haven't put something on." "Look, I got to get back." "Back?" "Back where?" "Listen, buddy..." "You don't got the money, it's cool, i mean..." "I like you." "I'll blow you for 50." "Listen to me, knock off the bullshit, okay?" "Come in the bathroom." "It's going to sting a little bit..." "Why are you doing this?" "Take a shower." " This is fresh towel..." " Thanks." "Go to sleep." "Hello, this is Dr. Parker." "My son's ADHD, and I looked it up online and that's what he's got." "Now you gotta give him his free laptop." "Mr. Kevin, your son Oliver's injured students." "His problems are behavioral." "Hey, my kid's got a disability, and he's not learning anything." "And it's your fault!" " Hey hey..." " What are you doing?" "What is the matter with you?" "As it is, our resources are emaciated and I have real LD kids that need my attention." "He's always mad, all the time, because he's not getting the services he need." ""No Child Left Behind" promises me my right, you'll be hearing from my lawyer!" "Mister..." "Hey, what are you doing?" "What is this?" "What is this, funny?" "Get to class, get to class right now." "What's the joke?" "I didn't got the joke, huh?" "Is this funny?" "Does that look good to you?" "You like hurting animals?" "Huh?" "!" "Is that what you like to do?" "Yes, you do." "You like hurting animals." "You like this?" "!" "Come here, go, let's go, come on." "Walk." "Mr. Raymond, studies have shown that kids who are proned to hurting animals at an early age eventually fall into a high percentage of adults who may fail to develop even the most basic feeling for people." "Evan, how do you feel about this?" "I feel... trapped." "Like the cat." "Fuck." "Who are you?" "Hey, what?" "What?" "!" "Did you pay her?" "Did you pay her?" "Did you pay her?" "Yeah alright, here, yeah yeah alright, here..." " Alright, here..." " What are you paying me for, huh?" "!" "Wasn't in my mouth!" "Get fuck out of here, get out of here!" "Fuck!" "Don't hurt me!" "Here..." "Change your sheets!" "How do you do it, kid?" "Please, don't be mad at me." "I'm not mad at you." "And don't think about, you and me," "I won't do it anymore." "I promise." "You don't need to promise me" "Okay, don't promise to me." "Whatever it is, that you feel that you need to do, you do it." "But you don't do it here!" "Okay?" "What are you doing there?" "Don't you knock?" "So what is all this supposed to be?" "Your tortured soul?" "Why don't you paint something cheerful?" "Like happy with color." "What do you want from me, dad?" "Besides for me to have been born with a penis." "I don't work all day..." "To have my night ruining by your teen angst." "*** might get you a full-right to Stanford if your were some minority..." "I am not going to support you... and your little creative habits!" "Okay?" "I've had it with all your little art projects... that are going nowhere!" "You always know what to say, Dad." "No, if... if you grew your hair up, and..." "lose some weight, you could attract a nice boy and, who knows..." "There should be a... prerequisite... a curriculum for being a parent before, people, attempt." "Don't try this at home." "Take these." "What are those?" "You're supposed to ask me before you take them." "They are vitamins and aspirin." "At some point, hum..." "You should get an HIV test." "At some point." "Why were you crying on the bus?" "Go to sleep." "A friend of yours?" "A friend?" "Hum..." "No..." "No, no." "Of course he had no friends, he was a...." "Total asshole." "What was his problem?" "He chose a vocation that did not choose him..." "I mean, he spent his whole career..." ""casting pearls before swine", he talked like that..." "***" "He tried to purge Steinbeck and Faulkner from our required reading list." "Oh yes." "Let it be said, from the safety of his sabbatical *** you can't do no more harm." "How did he die?" "Who knows and... who cares?" "Lupe, It's trudgery, this life..." "A detention, suspension, expulsion... the staff meetings, the papers cuts, the vacant parents, their vicious kids, they're the drags, Lupe." "They spat on my soul." "This humiliation will stop." "Discipline must be restored, these kids have us on the run." "***" "It's fucking madness!" "Like, every child has value?" "Is a winner and worthier *** for education?" "Fucking kids who have no desire, no fire, no mind to peace..." "*Adolf Hitler speech*" ""Assimilate"" "What does that mean?" "To take something in." "Okay, excellent." "To absorb." ""Ubiquitous"" "Anyone?" "Everywhere, all the time." "So what is..." ""ubiquitous assimilation"" "Always absorbing everything, everywhere, all the time?" "Well done, George." "How are you to imagine anything?" "If the images are always provided for you." "Who here read "1984" last year?" "Good." "Anyone?" "Meredith?" "Having two opposing beliefs at once and believing that both are true." "Excellent Meredith." "Why do you always suck his dick, you fucking kiss ass?" "To deliberately believe in lies, while knowing they are false." "Examples of this, in everyday life." "Oh, I..." "I need to be pretty... to be happy." "I need surgery... to be pretty." "I need to be thin..." "famous... fashionable." "Our young men, today, are being told that women..." "are whores... bitches..." "things to be screwed... beaten... shit on... ashamed..." "This is a marketing holocaust." "24 hours a day, for the rest of our lives, the powers that be are hard at work... dumbing us to death!" "So, to defend ourselves... and fight against assimilating this dullness into our thought processors." "We must learn to read, to stimulate our own imagination." "To cultivate... our own consciousness, our own belief systems." "We all need these skills." "To defend," "To preserve," "Our own minds." "Just very carefully, that's perfect." "Great." "Look..." "You just made your own tessellation." "Wow." "I don't care what they say, you're doing great." "I had a hard time with maths too, it takes time." "Wow, that is damn cool." "Hi guys, thanks for staying late... all... 15 or 20 of you." "Today we will be presented with new course work, engineered to boost state exams performance, as mandated by "No Child Left Behind"." "Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, it's my pleasure to be here." "I've come today with some edifying materials to help your matriculated and non-matric students" "better prepare for the upcoming state exams this May." "Let me start by stating I love teachers..." "I love what you do, what you stand for," "You guys are the real heroes." "Now the one thing I've learned in all my years in the private sector," "Is that..." "real estate generate revenue." "And burgeoning property values will be this school saving grace." "But your school's low test scores," "Are bringing down home resell value in this neighborhood during a market already in decline." "We gotta get scores up, new families in our district," "and more motivated kids in your school." "And I'm not placing any blame..." "Excuse me, are you here to sell some tests materials... or to air your concerns as a property owner?" "Listen, umm..." "I am curious." "Are you giving away pop-corn with this crap that you're pushing?" "This faculty has spent their lives on the boards and you tell us... that our careers are about resell value?" "Bullshit!" "Give him hell, lady." " Storm the gates." " Don't oversimplify, ma'am," "That's a *** you can't afford." "That sounds like a threat." "Can you... that's enough, will you please sit down?" "That's enough." " Could you please sit down..." " Can we have some order here, please..." "Dr. Hart was right," " Your school's the pride of the district." " Yeah, you bet pal." "Could you finish your pitch?" "We'd like to go home." "What's your hurry, huh?" "I hear they're putting you out to pasture..." "So enjoy running this relic for a few more months" "You're fossil and you're fucking done!" "Ever dread going home?" "Lately I don't know what to do with myself when I'm not in the classroom." "Some Friday afternoons, I'm afraid to go home..." "Afraid of all that time alone..." "Yeah" "My mother hates my father passionately..." "I'm there for them on a permanent basis..." "Watch a lot of TV..." "Probably the only time I don't feel naked..." "Not a temporary one..." " I teach for selfish reasons..." " My mother was a Miss Madison..." " You're better than that..." " I need control..." " I need those kids more than I should..." " She does this great..." "Her moments in the school where all the moments..." "It must *** up there in front of them..." "That's it, you ever had..." "So what's your story?" "My story?" "I'm just umm..." "I'm just taking one thing at a time." "Why are you wasting your life, you know something to dodge?" "I teach every day, I mean, when we..." "I mean, you don't really know me." "So what happened to you?" "You don't want something more permanent?" " Hi." " Where have you been?" "What?" "I was out." " With a colleague." " A boy or a girl?" "A woman." "You make me feel like so stupid, why do you treat me like a kid?" "Well, you are a kid." "I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting this." "All you had to do is tell me you're gonna be home later." "Well, back up, alright?" "I am not beholden to you, okay?" "I mean, you're welcome to stay here..." "But, you don't have to get expectations of me, alright?" "This is a temporary thing, you..." "you're able to stay here, but... eventually you're gonna have to go, you understand that?" " I think it's important that..." " It's clear." "I get it, you want me to go now?" "I got better things to do than clean up the stuff." "I can't believe you made dinner." "From what?" "Groceries, from the grocery store..." "Wow, it's really nice kid." "It's been a long time since somebody cooked me a well-cooked meal." "Thank you Erica." "We all have problems, we all have things that we're dealing with, right?" "And we all... take them home with us at night," "take them to work with us in the morning." "I think that helplessness, that realization, that... foreboding of... being adrift into sea" "It's no..." "bowie, no safety net." "When you thought you'd be the one throwing the bowie." "Hi?" " Anything for dinner?" " Tell me all about it from the beginning." " You don't care." " Oh, no..." "So untrue, love." "You are so condescending..." "Give me a kiss." "Come on, go on talking, it'll sort everything." " Come." " Stop it." "Do you remember..." "when I bought you this?" "That beautiful summer in Venice, before I traveled through a resign to..." "reviving old passions, hum?" ""You suck!"" " Flubby?" " Yeah." "Grandpa, are you doing any writing?" "In your journal?" "No..." "I don't remember much, and lost the habit." "You can't think in this place" "You can't make new memories." "Thank you." " Are you alright?" " What?" "You see me?" "You see me standing here?" "Yes, I see you." "Oh God, it's so relentless, thank you." "Carol, there's no nice way for me to do this." "I've spoken with the superintendent, he's agreed to let you *** at the rest of the year." "It is what it is." "Take your pension and go to that beautiful house of yours." "Send Mr. Dearden my best..." "Haven't you ever... had enough?" "Haven't you ever just wanted to tell someone to fuck off?" "I think I'm sick, I don't know..." " Huh?" " I crossed a line today..." "I mean the whole..." "the whole thing is fucked." "The whole thing is fucked, is it not?" "What up, Dr. Parker?" "Can we get this over with?" "I got shit to do." "Okay, so what are your plans after high school" "Missy, since you're not going to college?" "I don't know, pfff..." "Hang out with my boyfriend, do some modeling shit..." "Be in my friend's band..." "Well, I have your *** grade report." "Do you know what it says?" " F, F, F, F..." " F." " F, F, F... yeah." "Do you know what that means?" "It means you don't care." "You're brilliant." "Can I go now?" "God, you are a shallow, disgusting, creature." "You want to know the truth?" "One: you're not gonna be in a band, or a model Missy, because you have no ambition." "With no skills, you'll be competing with 80 % of the U.S." "workforce for a minimum wage job which you'll work out for the rest of your life" "Until you're replaced by a computer." " I don't care" " Two:." "The only talent you'll ever have is getting men to fuck you." "Your life will basically become a carnival of pain." "And when you can't stand it, not one more day, not one more hour," "It will get worse, much worse!" "Everyday I came in this office and I listened your kids to shit-off all of yourself!" "It is so easy to be careless, it takes courage and character to care!" "None of you have any of these qualities." " Get out!" "Just get out!" "Get out!" " Fuck you!" " I'm a total burn out." " You are not." "I am." "I mean I don't know how you make it through the day." "Listen." "Seriously, why do you think I take these pills for?" "I mean, that's a rubber room in here." "If I didn't take these things, I'd be..." "I'd become a mass murderer on half of these parents." "And I'd be helping them throwing their fucking kids out the window, come on..." "You're the best." "I'll tell you my opinion, the worst thing about this job... is that nobody says "thank you"." " No..." " No." "Well, I am here to say thank you" "For doing a job that none of us could do." "None of us." "Have I ever told you that you're the only person I have to talk to?" " Hi, Henry." " What happened?" "They called your house," " Your grandfather felt some chest pains." " And?" "The doctor says he's stable." "He doesn't have a lot of time." "I'm so sorry, Henry." "How long..." "have you been here?" "Since this morning." "I didn't know how to get a hold of you." "I don't know where you work." "Been here the whole day with him?" "Hi Grandpa." "Still hanging in there I see, huh?" "Ho, hey sweetheart." "Your mother was with me today." "Did you see her?" " No" " I told her I was afraid to leave you." "But... she promised." " That she'd look after you." " I'm sure she meant that." "Patricia, darling." "You've forgiven me, haven't you?" "What do you need to be forgiven for, daddy?" "Those things..." "You know, the things I did." "All you ever did was take care of me." " Always look after me." " Weren't you afraid of me?" "No, daddy." "No, sir." "You know how you get sometimes, you get a little mixed up." "You feel responsible for things you didn't do." "So I wasn't the one that hurt you?" "No sir, that wasn't you." "I hope it wasn't true." "Patricia, darling, I've always loved you." "Daddy, you can feel free to leave, whenever you're ready." "Do you know that?" "It's okay." "There is nothing to fear." "Come on." "Get out of here." "Is Patricia be your mom?" "What happened to her?" "She left a while ago." "You mean she died?" "How did she die?" "My father left when I was a kid, I don't really remember him," "It was always the three of us, Mother, Grandpa and I together." "In his house." "I found her... on the floor." "She'd taken enough pills, so..." "And, Grandpa at the moment, kinda lost it..." "I sat with grandpa on the porch and we watched as they came, took her away..." "How old were you?" "Seven." "I don't know for sure but I think that, when my mother was young, something happened" " With her and grandpa." " Were you afraid of it?" "No." "Did she ever say anything to you?" "No." "But, looking back on it, I think she protected me in her own way." "How?" "She made me lock my door at night." "The park is now empty and bare, with an abandoned shame about it." "The Jungle Jim." "The slide and the swing have rusted together." "And also terribly alone now." "Where did all the children go?" "Didn't they know that the park needed them?" "The child's intelligent heart can find the depth of many dark places." "But it can not fathom a delicate moment of his own detachment." " Hi Mr. Barthes." " Hi Meredith." " How's it going?" " Fine, I'm alright..." "I made a picture for you." "Come here." " You did?" " Yeah." "Wow, it's beautiful, it's..." "you're really talented." " Thanks" " Have you been doing this for a long time?" "I've been doing it since I was a kid." "A faceless man in an empty room." "Is that how you see me, Meredith?" "I don't know how I see you," "This is just how I thought of you in your situation." "I mean, didn't you ever think about who your teachers were on the outside?" " In real life?" " I guess so, yeah." "Does this place seem unreal to you?" "I watched you around the school and you always seem so sad." "If you've a hard time with things..." "and you need someone to talk to..." " Meredith?" " Yes?" " Do you need someone to talk to?" " Yeah, will you talk to me?" "When you talk to me, it's like you really see me." "I do see you Meredith." "Want to go see Dr. Parker with me?" "Oh, come on, don't blow me off to the guidance counselor." "I'm not, I'm not..." "What can I do?" "It's like you said, we're..." "we've *** into this." "There is nothing left, nothing but to realize how fucked up things are." "It's not enough, I won't last." "Listen to me, just listen." "We are all the same, we all feel pain, we all have chaos in our lives." "Life is very very confusing, I know." "I don't have the answers but I know that if you write it out, it will all be okay." " Mr. Barthes, do you like me?" " Of course I do." " Meredith..." " No, please..." " Meredit, I'd like to help you..." " Please, please..." " You don't..." " You said you liked me, please..." "Please, please..." "Oh please, don't push me away, please Just hold on to me and tell me that everything is gonna be okay." "Everything is okay." "It is okay." "Meredith, wait a second" " What is going on?" " What?" " Hey, Meredith?" " What were you just doing?" "Meredith, I am sorry." " What were you doing?" " What?" "What are you doing?" " Excuse me?" "!" " You were just touching her!" "What are you..." "what are you insinuating?" "It is inappropriate to be in here alone with that young girl." "It's inappropriate?" "She needed someone to talk to." " What do you think I'm doing?" "Huh, lady?" " I don't know what you're doing." "Just hold me close." "What do you think I am fucking pervert?" "Is that what you're insinuating?" "She needed someone to talk to her." " Well then why were you touching her?" " I wasn't touching her" "***" "Patricia" "I'm not... not some sick old man!" "Is that what you think of me?" "Is that what you think?" "I just wanted to help her!" " Get out!" "Excuse me!" "Excuse me!" " What am I supposed to think?" "You're supposed to *** fucking judgmental!" "Hello?" "No, he's not home." "Hello Mr. Barthes." "Whenever you feel like you're ready we do have some paperwork downstairs, that we need you to take care of." "I'm sorry." "I wish things were different." "I tried, you know, fuck that thing is... we all..." "We all have problems, we all have things that we're dealing with, right?" "Some days we're better than others, some days we're not so great, some days we have limited space" "for others." "***" "Want some milk?" "These kids need... something else." "They don't need me." " You're okay?" " Yeah, I'm not hungry." "You know, you can't keep living on the street." "I'm not, I mean I'm staying here with you." "Well, you can't continue to stay here with me." " I'm not good for you." " It's not true." "You're like the only family I've ever had." "Well, I can't be your family." "I can't give you what you need." " You have to understand, you should be..." " You are good... and gentle... you are the most kind..." "I love you Henry." " Come on in." " Hi." "Hello there." " Erica..." " Don't let them take me..." "Please..." " Nooo..." " Listen, you have to..." "You are all that I have, please..." "Don't let me go..." "No, no..." "Henry!" "Henry!" " Henry!" "Henry!" " You have to let go now." " Henry!" "Henry!" " Come on." " No!" "No!" "..." " It's gonna be okay." "Don't do this!" " It'll be okay." " No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "..." "Well, I feel just awful for her." " For who?" " Our school." "It may sound baroque but I've always felt that the school had a spirit." "These aren't just dull ***, but they're alive." "I just don't understand it:" "Where are all the parents?" "I don't know." "I was in my room for two hours and saw one parent, where are they?" "Where is everybody?" " We don't know." " It's uncanny." "No air raid sirens, no bombs." "Doesn't happen that way." "Starts in whisper, and then nothing." "We had our music once, didn't we?" "Yes, we did." "Do you remember these nights, when we had two parents at a time?" "And then there were more, there were many more waiting in the waiting ***" "The halls were full of joy and celebration." "Now, it's nothing." "In remembrance of things passed." "I actually felt quite at home." "There were no parents." "I thought "how appropriate"." "It was like, a moment of insight." "The reality of the fucking problem in the first place." "Some of us believe that we can make the difference." "And then sometimes, we wake up and we realize we failed." "Hi, this is Gretchen calling from the free clinic." "Erica Louis' test results are back, please get us a call at your earliest convenience." "Thank you." " You have good parents." " You shut up." " Meredith." " Her mother and I gave her..." "You dike bitch!" "What is all this supposed to be?" "Your tortured soul?" "... nothing but to realize how fucked up..." " Sorry you're picking a fight." " Paint something cheerful..." " We all have chaos in our lives..." " Grow your hair, lose some weight..." "It will all be okay." " Good morning." " Morning." "Alright, before we take roll," "I want to tell you that..." "today will be my last day with you." "You're gonna have a permanent teacher on Monday." " Where're you going, Mr. Barthes?" " I'll go to another school." " We'll miss you, man. *** with you." " Yeah?" "All those teachers in this place... they're dickheads." "You don't get tired of moving around all the time?" "It's how my job works, Tania." "I come in here for a period of time... so you don't have 20 subs in and out of here and then... you have a permanent teacher come in and... and I leave." ""Attention to all teachers, this is a special announcement from the principal's office."" ""There will be an all-faculty meeting today, during nutrition."" ""Student nutrition will be extended"" ""for ten minutes, thank you."" "I invited you here, today, to discuss the state of things." "I know that there wasn't..." "I know that there isn't..." " I'm sorry..." " We all need something to distract us from..." "complexity, and reality." "No one wants to think about where that came from?" "No one wants to think about the struggle that it takes..." "To become somebody, to get out of... to get out of the... sea of pain that we all have to get out off." " Hi Meredith" " Hey." "Haven't seen you in class lately." "Where have you been?" " Baking." " Oh, I see." "Yeah." "I'm happy I get to see you, you know." "It's my last day." "How ironic!" "Listen, I was thinking, I bought this for myself but... maybe you could..." "make better use of it." " I like that the best." " Can't have that one, it's mine." "You can have this one?" " It's better for you anyway." " Thanks." "I'm sorry." "If I hurt you, in any way." "I um..." "I know... that it's tough right now, for you..." " But it's not..." " Goodbye, Mr. Barthes." "Goodbye Meredith." "They say that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem," "I'll let you know." "My name is Meredith and I want to kill myself." "Meredith." "Henry" "It's gonna be okay." "It's gonna be okay." "It's gonna be okay." "It's gonna be okay." "We have such a responsibility to guide a young so that they don't end up... falling apart," "falling by the wayside, becoming insignificant." "I realized something today." "I'm a non-person, Sarah." "You shouldn't be here." "I'm not here." "You may see me..." "but I'm hollow." "Failing..." "we're failing." "Failed in the sense that we..." "have left... everyone down." "Including ourselves." "Walking on the hallway, or in class, how many of you... have ever felt the weight pressing down on you?" "I have." "Everyone?" "Well, Poe wrote about these things over 100 years ago." "So, as we read... we can see that the House of Usher is not merely an old... decrepit castle in disrepair." "It's also a state of being." "During the whole of a dull, dark, and soundless day in the autumn of that year, when the clouds hung oppressively low in the heavens," "I had been passing alone, on horseback, through a singularly dreary tract of country;" "And at length found myself, as the shades of the evening drew on, within view of the melancholy House of Usher." "I know not how it was but, with the first glimpse of the building, a sense of insufferable gloom pervaded my spirit." "I looked upon the simple landscape of the domain, upon the bleak walls, upon the white trunks of decayed trees" "with an utter depression of soul." "There was an iciness, a sinking," "a sickening of the heart."