"When ten single men and women go back 200 years in time to look for romance, what can you expect?" "Bottoms up." "Ladies and gentlemen... 36-24-35." "Start your engines." "For nine weeks, these men and women... and their chaperones, of course..." "So, you're my chaperone?" "You think that Mr. Everett would be good in the sack?" "But the rules are not the same for everyone." "I need to ask you every day whether I'm coming down for dinner?" "I'll let you know." "It's the ultimate dating game..." "I think she's very attractive." "At the Regency House Party." "We're going to have a wedding." "Fantastic." "Captioning sponsored by WNET/THIRTEEN NEW YORK" "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "in the heart of the Herefordshire countryside, is being taken back to the year 1811." "Preparations are under way for a house party... a summer gathering that will last for nine weeks." "Our household staff of 40 specially trained servants are preparing for the arrival of five single men and five women eager to discover a new dimension to romance." "romance was a slow dance played out with courtesy and reverence." "But finding the right mate was not just about falling in love." "Marriage was business, a chance to achieve power, wealth and status." "Every move was scrutinized by matchmakers and chaperones." "During their summer together, will our men and women follow their 19th-century heads or their 21st-century hearts?" "Hosting our Regency house party will be our own Mr. Darcy, 29-year-old Chris Gorell Barnes." "He lives in London and produces TV ads." "My mother is a psychiatrist;" "my father ran a merchant bank called Morgan Grenfell." "My father died when I was ten, which was a bit of a shock." "I've got a sister called Lucy, who's an artist and she's lovely." "I would like to, in a few years, get married and have a family, but I think it's a question of finding the right person." "I tend to sort of suddenly feel trapped quite quickly." "and kind of go hell-for-leather with it at the beginning, sort of almost go too far." "Gorell Barnes will be joined in the Regency mating game by volunteers like him from around Britain." "They're going to live and love by a new set of rules." "My last cigarette for 200 years." "I think the Regency period is very sexy, and I think that the whole courting process is different from today." "I'm most excited about the unknown." "I'm excited about actually living in history." "Regency Britain was a superpower in the making." "She was the richest country in the world." "Her military heroes, Nelson and Wellington, were squaring up to mighty Napoleon." "The Regency introduced us to attitude, personal trainers, the tabloid press... and celebrity." "When George III went mad and relinquished his throne..." "His son, the Regent, the most extravagant prince in history, showed his people how to party." "Good morning, sir." "Mr. Gorell Barnes is set to follow the Regent's example as he takes over as host and master of Kentchurch Court for the next two months." "Next to make the journey back in time, the men of the party." "To help them become Regency gents, each is given a guide to the person he might have been" "200 years ago." "Second to Mr. Gorell Barnes in wealth and class is Mr. Everett." "In a world where money and status count for everything, he's the next-best catch." ""You were born in 1782" ""and you have a considerable family fortune." ""You perhaps enjoy the most freedom in choosing a wife" ""since you do not need money and you have no pressing duty to a noble bloodline."" "In modern life," "John Everett works as a stage manager at London's Bush Theatre." "Are you out of your culture shock, are you?" "It's pretty weird, this." "It's very weird." "Do I just call you Chris..." "Um..." "I'm happy to call me Chris, but I think you're supposed to call me" "Mr. Gorell Barnes." "Third in order of eligibility is company director and former dot-com millionaire Jeremy Glover." "His own Regency naval ancestor, Captain Blackwood, fought shoulder to shoulder with Nelson at Trafalgar." "As part of this project, I hope to get gout," "I'd like an NVQ in boxing and fencing, hopefully fall in love with one of the, um... one of the young ladies, get one of the chaperones pregnant..." "Following family tradition," "Jeremy Glover will be a Regency naval captain." "I guess it's probably more basic than I imagined for some reason." "Manage to see what are all these bits and pieces do here." "The fourth man in the social pecking order is Paul Robinson, a hairdresser from Brighton." "If there was someone in the house" "I'd probably fall in love with them straightaway because that's..." "I'm quite an addictive person." "Can, um, you take my sword for me?" "A celebrity hairdresser of the day could make enough money to buy the ultimate fashion accessory:" "a commission in the army." "Whoa... awesome." "At the bottom of the social pile is secondary school science teacher Mark Foxsmith." "I want children, you see." "I'm 32 and I want children and it gets worse and worse and worse every year." "Good day to you." "Do you know where you're going?" "Mr. Foxsmith would probably have earned his living as a clergyman." "He's not much of a catch." "I would like to meet somebody who would be a permanent partner for the" "Yeah, I'm looking..." "for true love." "Sir, would it be possible to have some water?" "Yes, sir." "Mr. Foxsmith makes an unwelcome discovery... he'll be sharing with Captain Robinson." "Was there two books here before, or did one of them just appear?" "Sharing rooms was commonplace." "At the smartest house parties, men were sometimes obliged to take turns to sleep in the same bed." "And it would be most awkward if I did." "I'm addicted to my snuff." "Already?" "All our Regency bucks have arrived at last." "Then they like nothing more than to party together." "a two-month supply." "Cigarettes have yet to be invented, so tobacco has to be snorted in the form of snuff." "Mr. Gorell Barnes..." "how are you?" "I'm very pleased to meet you." "Did you have a good journey?" "I had a fantastic journey." "Sir, I'm sharing a room with... if I was to sleep on a couch somewhere else?" "I'm sorry that my house isn't big enough for you." "As the men are dining alone, the table is laid for a light, informal dinner." "I would like to propose a toast." "Raise our glasses to the next two months." "Let's tuck in, let's enjoy ourselves, yeah?" "Cheers." "Let's get on with it." "The custom of taking wine calls for one diner to catch the eye of another and invite them to drink." "You're supposed to gulp this stuff." "That's what I read some..." "Before the days of clean water," "Everyone in the Regency drank, many to excess." "The playwright Sheridan and the Prince Regent himself could each down 15 bottles of port in a day." "Are we going to make a wager?" "I was just asking, are you gentlemen... £40... to the first person who bonks." "I can't really put "bonks," "shags."" "Only six hours into the experience and the men are behaving exactly as their Regency counterparts." "The first shag..." "First shag is a good one." "Talking dirty... drinking excessively... and gambling at every opportunity." "First gentleman to obtain one of the ladies' petticoats." "Regency men could never be trusted with women, so every party had to be presided over by a hostess of mature years." "That task has been given to Mrs. Fiona Rogers, a former society model and debutante." "Nowadays, young people take great offense at being told how they should or shouldn't behave." "But I do actually have a really big issue with bad manners." "It knocks me to hell, people who are rude." "Mrs. Rogers is too much of a lady to be a servant, but she does have a job to do." "It will be up to her to keep the party respectable." "This is lovely." "She's not got an easy task." "Do we have the wager book?" "Yes, sir." "Thank you." "Welcome to Kentchurch Court." "I think..." "I think it does the job." "I tell you what..." "Would he do that, though?" "I need to ask my flunky." "Would he... would he..." "would he..." "Would a gentleman crouch or would he remain on his chair?" "The gentlemen missed the arrival of their hostess." "In this day and age, this wasn't a problem." "Would have kept on with your conversation." "It was indescribably rude of the host to be in such a condition that he was unable to receive me when I arrived." "If he'd had any breeding and manners, he would have ensured that he was still able to, um... uh... greet me on arrival in his house." "Oh, well." "Here we begin." "It's the morning of the second day, and the women of the Regency house party are due to arrive." "Mr. Glover?" "Good morning, sir." "Good morning." "After protesting at being asked to share a room," "Mr. Foxsmith unwittingly spent the night on the lawn." "Um, do you know what happened to me last night?" "Sir, I'm afraid I..." "I don't have that information." "Because I've got a bit of memory loss." "I personally thought it was very, very peculiar and very rude that the host was so drunk last night that he was unable to come and greet me." "Would you like me to shave you this morning, sir, or would you like to shave yourself?" "I might not bother." "Um... may I suggest you will be meeting the hostess today, so I would advise you shave, sir." "All right." "While the Regent is now making a point of bathing daily, in most British homes, such practice is deemed a gross excess." "Stream clean... clean, clean." "Personal cleanliness limits bathing to every few weeks or months." "I'm the cleanest person out, you know." "I'm clean as a whistle." "What I did is I sneaked off to a stream and, um, I'm clean..." "I'm clean boy." "Clean!" "I'm clean!" "Mr. Gorell Barnes has the customary draft of ale for breakfast." "He has yet to meet the hostess." "A meeting was requested by the hostess, which was supposed to be here at 11:00, but now she's decided that she wants to delay it." "But she hasn't told me why, and she wants to change venue." "A bit cheeky." "Do you want something stronger?" "Not before arrival." "Equipping the men for the Regency continues with one key accessory." "Time for us to have some fun with these pistols." "Firing live shots." "Beyond the country estate was a world of cutthroats and highwaymen." "A man might have to defend his property and his honor... which was wildly inaccurate and could explode." "hell!" "While prohibited by law, dueling was still common." "Over 90% were fought over women." "Where did that go?" "That one's mine." "This one's mine." "At last Mr. Gorell Barnes is to meet the hostess." "It's in his interest they get along." "Her job includes finding him a suitable wife." "Come in." "Hello." "Do excuse me not getting up." "How was your journey?" "Not too bad, not too bad." "I mean, I gather you all had sort of... you got everybody here yesterday, so it was deemed better for me to meet you all this morning." "I would have thought it was in both our interest to work, you know, to each other's advantage." "In return for a pleasant summer and all her board," "Mrs. Rogers will be looking out for a partner for the young master." "Pairing him up with the right kind of girl could earn her a hefty reward." "You have to try and facilitate me finding a wife?" "Mrs. Rogers already has a candidate in mind." "She's also chaperone to a real-life countess." "My full name is Larushka Danielovna Ivan-Zadeh Griaznov." "And mainly I work as a barmaid and I review horror films." "I can call myself Countess Griaznov if I chose." "Men seem to find it quite romantic and exciting, so if you mention you're a countess, they tend to get rather excited." ""As a titled lady with an impressive social background" ""and a reputation of wealth, you are the prize catch of the ladies."" "Like the gentlemen, the ladies have also been given a guide to the life they could have had in the early 1800s." "Just to give you a rundown on my charge, she's Russian... aristocracy dating back to Ivan the Terrible on your father's side." "Mrs. Rogers loses no time in promoting the countess to Mr. Gorell Barnes." "If she can pair them off, she'll be rewarded by both families." "Do you like Larushka?" "Really, really nice... clever, um... pretty, just really nice." "As the highest-ranking woman, she gets the best room in the house." "But the countess has a little secret." ""Contrary to your appearance of wealth," ""the cost to your family of supporting Czar Alexander" ""in the recent wars with Prussia and France" ""has left them, and you, virtually penniless." ""It is imperative that you do your utmost" ""to keep this shameful fact a secret and maintain an appearance of wealth."" "Protocol forbids the men to greet the ladies on arrival." "There's a lady in the library with a telescope looking up the hill." "And what's she doing?" "She's looking at me looking at her." "So, you're my chaperone?" "Yes." "You're looking after my interests." "Are you looking after the other girls?" "The host is the highest sort of...?" "Yeah, he seems perfectly acceptable." "I think it would be a good idea" "I was thinking to myself, "What would I say about the fact" ""that I have less money than any other girl here even though I'm the highest status?"" "I thought my cover story might be that I've had quite a racy and interesting life and my father has sent me to England to try and make me into a proper lady, um... and because of my gambling habits" "has cut my..." "my, um... expenses income." "It does say here you could be the bane of my life so..." "I wouldn't risk it, darling." "I already feel that way." "I'm a big girl." "Will I read everybody the rules of the house?" "Okay, the rules of captivation for gentlemen:" "getting your leg over." "In this world where men and women can only ever meet formally, it's vital our gentlemen are equipped to detect the slightest hint of interest." "Right, let's go to the fan bit, because I like that." "Right, if the fan is presented shut..." "Yeah, that... that is..." "that means they love you." "What, very slowly?" "Now, this is important." "If they're carrying it in their right hand... that means you're coming on too much." "Right, so that could be an important one." "So slow down a bit, gentlemen, if they're doing that." "Ah, arrivals." "Oh, here we go." "Oh, God, is she wearing a bonnet?" "Six foot, 36-24-35." "Squint the eye." "There she blows!" "The second woman to arrive, and the most attractive marriage prospect, is industrial heiress Victoria Hopkins." "She's rich." "I am the sales and marketing director of my family's engineering company." "I work with my dad and my uncle." "My love life is referred to by my friends as the travelator, because there's always kind of at least one or two people on it." "There's very few men who can afford me... if I'm honest." "I need refining." "You do need refining." "You're a bit rough around the edges." "Yeah, apparently so." "Victoria's chaperone is real-life aristocrat Elizabeth, Lady Devonport." "A titled lady was often paid to introduce daughters of the socially inferior into high society." "I call them Mr. this and Captain that" "My chaperone is absolutely fantastic." "We come from kind of very, very different backgrounds, and I know that she is a kind of proper lady, um... which for me is..." "is kind of..." "I'm very privileged to meet somebody of such status." "A drink to the ladies." "It's been nice having the company of men, but, uh, we definitely need, um... people of the female persuasion to arrive." "In Regency terms, Miss Hopkins' new money would be a perfect match for Mr. Everett's old family connections." "Describe Victoria..." "tall, slim, fat, round...?" "Um, quite slim." "Would you, uh... would you..." "Would you her?" "Thank you." "The whole experience is really, really overwhelming." "I don't really know how to behave just yet." "I kind of want to be me, but I..." "I'm not me, the way I'm dressed and the kind of surroundings and the people and the way they're talking to me." "Would you like anything?" "No, I'm fine, thank you." "Next to arrive is Lisa Braund." "She's a receptionist with a firm of property developers." "Current state of my love life?" "Uh, pretty nonexistent." "I've been out speed dating." "You get to talk to someone for exactly three minutes and then guys get up and jump to the next chair." "Miss Braund ranks third in the female marriage stakes." "Her chaperone is real-life self-made millionairess" "Oh, look at the wild flowers..." "cow parsley, campion." "Everything's beautiful... nettles." "Oh, wow!" "Guests are given rooms according to their status." "Only those with money and rank get any privacy, as the impoverished Miss Braund and her wealthy chaperone are about to discover." "So, are we both in this room?" "Double bed, but..." "I'm a bit surprised about the rooms." "My reaction was: "Oh, my God, we're sharing a double bed."" "No, darling, this is your room." "I've got a little tiny bunk thing." "Will you fit in that?" "Then I thought, "She's richer than me, so she'd obviously have a nicer place," and she has." "So I've got this kind of little box-room thing" "But it'll be fine..." "I'm looking forward to it." "I'm not a governess." "Miss Braund's closest rival and next in order of eligibility is 25-year-old trainee headhunter Hayley Conick." "I'm very single... very single." "Um, and I have been for... uh, over a year." "Welcome to Kentchurch Court, ladies." "Miss Conick's chaperone is Mrs. Rosemary Enright, a former army officer turned romantic novelist." "It's a lovely room, isn't it?" "As Mrs. Enright said, I'm the Elizabeth Bennett." "Maybe she's being a bit hopeful there, but, yeah, the, um... the lady of no means... financial means... but, um... hopefully..." "well, according to this anyway, um... of other talents." "Sharing is an excellent way of ensuring there's no monkey business." "I can rest easy and not be leaping at them at every creak." "The eligible members of the party have all arrived." "Now they prepare to meet." "In the Regency, it wasn't only the women who dressed to titillate." "Britain had the most sought after tailors in Europe." "It does make you feel very kind of... you feel... quite powerful." "Men's jackets were cut to reveal all from the waist down." "Ladies dressed to accent softness of form:" "round arms, shoulders and breasts." "So, you're all nervous?" "No, I'm, I'm..." "You're as cool as a cucumber." "They all sort of know little Regency things, you know, which side her fan's going to be pointing at you." "You know what I mean?" "But then lots of girls like a bit of rough, don't they?" "So I might be all right." "At last, the moment everyone has been waiting for." "Good evening." "Let me introduce you to our host." "This is Mr. Gorell Barnes." "Mr. Everett, Captain Glover," "Mr. Foxsmith and Captain Robinson." "It's time for the chaperones to get to work." "They've got to discover fast who's got the money and who's got the class." "to get their girl the man with the best prospects." "Quite suddenly Mr. Foxsmith avowed his admiration for Miss Conick to me." "He said a great deal that was pleasant to hear about her eyes." "So I promptly asked Mr. Foxsmith, without beating around the bush, what his income was." "He said it was £200 a year." "I asked him how he was augmenting his income what prospects of preferment he had in his profession, and none of them sound impressive." "I'm not interested in their money." "I'll go for the poorest one if she's the one I like." "Mrs. Hammond is already scheming to secure wealthy Mr. Gorell Barnes for her charge, Miss Braund." "The wonderful Captain Robinson and I have reached an agreement." "What happened there?" "He will promote my charge and he will tell all of the other chaps because it's very important that the other chaps see her as very, very desirable." "And for that great favor, he has agreed to accept 20 whole pounds to help him with his gambling endeavors." "Probably feeling the same as us..." "the insecurity of..." "For his 20 quid... in today's money around £700..." "Captain Robinson is not helping to promote Miss Braund." "They all look like they've got big arses, and that is the dresses, isn't it?" "You'll have to get their clothes off, then, won't you?" "The one I instantly found attractive was, um..." "Miss Hopkins, because she kind of blushed when she come in." "I quite like that." "She's very English rose." "Yeah." "What do you think of... of the countess?" "I think..." "I'll tell you what... if she took her glasses off, she's quite pretty." "Foxy's..." "Foxy's going for it..." "look." "He's going for the chaperone." "Foxy." "The table is laid for the first formal dinner, each place set with an individual cooler in which the one glass could be washed between wines." "But one person won't be invited to dinner..." "Miss Francesca Martin." "She is the Cinderella of the party." "I've had this penchant for stalking people at university." "I met this person who I decided immediately was my perfect man, and instead of just, like, reacting normally," "I just sort of chased his taxi down the road at night and just like yelling at him, "Love me!" "Love me!"" "She will be lady's companion to the hostess... in effect an unpaid servant." "Officially, Miss Martin has no romantic prospects." "Dinner was the highlight of the Regency day." "Guests process to the dining room in order of status." "The men accompany the chaperones, leaving the younger women to follow behind." "Has everyone got a drink?" "To the ladies, and, um, I hope you all enjoy yourself." "Bottoms up." "Let the fun begin." "Soupe à la reine." "The term "nouvelle cuisine" was coined during the Regency for a meal which began with a healthy soup." "A dish of oysters with cayenne pepper... escalopes of veal, anchovy toasts, roast ribs of lamb and mint sauce." "Two courses, or removes, followed, and guests helped themselves." "Regency recipes mixed sweet and sour." "Diners piled their plates with meat, fish and puddings, all at the same time." "To demonstrate quality and freshness, the head was always served with its meat." "Britain was the only country in the world where women were expected to leave the men to drink at the table after dinner." "I just feel really suffocated." "I think it's the restrictions that are placed on me that I'm finding really hard." "I love to play snooker, and I know I can't go in there, and that's really, really unfair because I know I'd kick their arse." "What do you think of the ladies?" "No, I..." "I thought they're beautiful princesses, thank you." "is make a list of each lady and then we'd give them points." "Lady Devonport." "Uh, physically was the person that, uh, perhaps I'd rip the clothes off first." "Let me guess... ten?" "Ten." "First impressions are never right." "The women have been waiting for the men to join them for a good three hours." "They managed to come across as being a fairly kind of arrogant bunch, I thought." "Did you not think that?" "I reserve judgment, my dear." "I think the host is a good-looking guy, and men like that don't do anything for me either." "Um... thinking of one person that stood... kind of stood out to me was the gentleman Mr. Everett, who was quite quiet, and I think that's merely because he was obviously being himself and not feeling the need" "to kind of get on the testosterone bandwagon." "I think the host is incredibly handsome..." "Yeah, and I think he knows it, too." "Hmm, how nice to see you." "It's very nice of you to have joined us at last." "Can I offer any of you ladies some snuff?" "Because I know you are all quite keen on tobacco, if you'd like a fine line or snort." "No, I don't think we're allowed." "No, I'm..." "Am I allowed?" "offering to you if you'd like some snuff." "I'm afraid, ladies, it is not on offer." "No, it isn't up to them now." "That's most unfair." "It's up to their chaperones and me." "It's... it's very cruel to actually offer them" "I've pretty much had enough of this place." "It is just the most oppressive thing I think I've ever done in my life." "Here I am, a grown woman, and I just can't do anything." "I'm being treated like a little girl, and it's starting to really depress me." "Later that night Miss Hopkins' frustrations boil over." "She lets rip at the hostess." "She told me to off." "I was very, very angry with her." "I do not see what gives anybody the right to talk to an older woman as rudely as that." "While young women of the Regency were closely guarded, their chaperones, who were married, often had discreet affairs." "I've certainly connected more at the moment than I have with any of the sort of intended victims." "I think that she's such a special person." "She's such an incredible person." "She's such a beautiful person." "Robert, do you know who could have left me this posy flower?" "Sir, I've inquired but I have had no, uh, response;" "nobody has told me anything." "I think it might be, um, Lady Devonport, yeah, who is an extremely special person." "I think she's very attractive." "Sadly for Mr. Foxsmith," "Lady Devonport may not be around for much longer." "Since her charge insulted the hostess, both could face eviction." "I was very, very angry" "I thought her behavior was unbelievable... in both centuries." "She is a very, very rude girl." "No, I'm going to pass on the pork chops this morning." "Well, you know we always have pork chops for breakfast." "I'm caught up in all this ridiculous... atmosphere that's just dragging everybody down." "I'm sick of all of the social hierarchy and the one-upmanship." "I can't relate to it." "and I can't play the game, because it's just not inside me." "I am who I am;" "take me or leave me." "This means..." ""Yes."" "And this means... "no."" "And this is... um..." ""I love another."" "And this is "I'm married."" "The men, who had all the fun in the Regency, are already enjoying a busy schedule of country sports." "A bit of trot, Glover?" "They're oblivious of the tensions back at the house." "Legs again, sir." "Give the leg command again." "Give it a squeeze and ask for the trot." "For the women, who are left to wait, there are no pleasant distractions." "Thank you so much for coming to see me, because I think we really ought to discuss, um, the behavior that went on last night." "Lady Devonport has called on the hostess to defend her charge, Miss Hopkins." "The boys really like her." "Tough!" "There are lots of other people who would like her to stay, and they might be able to help her to behave in an appropriate way so that she..." "The only way to help her to behave in an appropriate way is by ignoring her tantrums." "I am..." "I'm very sorry." "I am really angry with her." "She didn't think she had a tantrum." "She did have a tantrum." "Nobody behaves like that." "Come on, Lady Devonport." "You can't say that her behavior was in any way acceptable at any point in history." "I am so angry about it." "You've got to decide whether you want to keep her in control to the degree that you then stay or you allow her to completely mess up your whole summer, because as far as I understand it, if she goes, you will have to go, too." "She said she wanted to be chucked out." "That was her parting shot at me:" ""If you want to get me sent away," "I'll be thrilled!"" "And she flounced off into the house." "I'm not going to be talked to like that." "So, I don't want to be angry with her, because it just isn't what I do, but I do think she's out of line, and I have said so." "Well, let's leave it at that." "We're going round and round in circles." "Okay, well, I'll then just tell her." "Well, you could have been rude to her." "You can be horrible to her;" "I don't want to be." "Her father is paying you to introduce her into smart society because they're too bloody common." "I think you do, and I think she knows that, too." "Miss Hopkins has decided to meet the hostess face to face." "People like myself and then some of the other girls are really, really finding this hard." "I'm not that stupid, my love." "that everybody is finding this exceedingly difficult." "So am I." "Can you look in your heart and really say that your parents and your grandfather..." "Would he really be proud?" "Do you think, "Oh, my girl's really good..." "I really don't think that's for you to say, do you?" "I do, because I'm older than you." "Does that mean you're any wiser?" "I think you'd better leave my room now." "I do not want you to bring my family into this." "Aren't you betraying your father, who is..." "My father wants the best for me, yes." "Yes, and he sees the best for you to learn how to behave in polite society." "And that's what I'm here to learn." "So, a bit more humility..." "Is it okay if I can go now?" "Yes, please do." "Thank you." "To relieve the tension in the women's quarters," "Mr. Gorell Barnes is supervising an evening entertainment which they, too, can enjoy." "No Regency party was complete without fireworks." "These replicate those designed for the inauguration of the Prince Regent on June 19, 1811." "Determined that his firework party should herald peace and harmony over his reign at Kentchurch," "Mr. Gorell Barnes visits the hostess." "All she seems to be doing is thinking about how hard she's finding it." "I don't know if "advice" is the right word," "I think we should probably cut people a bit of a slack until... and let... ease them into it, because I think that such restrictions that are being applied to some women, and especially women that have had such a free life before" "that they need... they might need more time to adapt." "I think at the moment, all of us are so worked up because it's new to all of us." "The fireworks bring a moment of pure Regency magic." "But will they have the desired effect?" "For Mr. Foxsmith, the fire of romance has already started to kindle," "Miss Hopkins, too, could have an admirer." "See, I've never been this close to fireworks." "I feel..." "I feel very close, actually." "In an age that was just learning to celebrate the power of love, fueled on by a few glasses," "Mr. Everett has made up his mind:" "He's going to convince Miss Hopkins to stay." "What?" "!" "What?" "Throwing stones at me." "Actually, I am wooing you." "I'm wooing you in a big way." "I appreciate your advances towards me, but..." "No, no..." "I just find you extremely attractive." "I..." "I... from the moment you walked in here," "I found you attractive." "I want you to come down here..." "Do you want to come down here?" " Stop it." " It's not fair on them." "Come on." "Of course it is." "If you do it, I will reprimand you." "Just get back inside." "Fantastic." "It's early days in the Regency House, but it's already clear that not all guests are created equal." "Too tight?" "That's fine." "Everyone has their own personal servant... everyone, that is, except the lowly Miss Francesca Martin, who is dependent on the occasional kindness of a passing maid." "I'm not an equal guest in the house, which on a practical level has proved to be quite difficult because, um, I don't have my own maid, so I'm often found in my underwear" "running up and down the corridor looking for anyone to just do me up." "Miss Francesca's position is lady's companion, effectively an unpaid servant." "She's the right class but has no money, so no Regency gentleman would think of marrying her." "Certainly in this game, which is about wealth and status," "I think that I'm certainly, like, the... the lowest woman, um, ranking, you know, number five." "And I'm for..." "I think I'm a backup plan, I think," "I mean, yeah, I'd have to sort of seriously use some charms to, um, attract an eligible man, I think." "Miss Francesca can only look on as the other guests make their first tentative moves in the Regency mating game." "There was no serenading because I couldn't think of anything to sing." "The only way to get on in this life is to marry someone with class or money, and preferably both." "To get a wife, it was essential to look the part." "This is Professor Radford... a Regency sports expert and world-record sprinter." "Regency gentlemen would use distinguished sportsmen like him as personal trainers." "Well, the plan of attack is twofold... one to introduce them to the pugilistic arts, so that they're prepared to defend themselves and can protect the honor of the lady, or whatever." "And then we'll move on to a little bit of posture and deportment and how a gentleman's bearing should be attended to and considered at all times." "And then we're going to take them outside and give them a breathing... stretch their legs, get their lungs going and introduce them to the art walking, um, athletically walking in a manly way, walking in a way that, um, might, in fact, lead" "to competition and wager." "As the wealthiest and most eligible of the Regency bucks, the master of the house..." "Mr. Gorell Barnes... can afford to take this lightly." "to get excited about, learning how to walk, isn't it?" "I'm very much looking forward to the reactions when I go and tell the other guys." "Yeah, I've just come to tell you what, um, the plans are for this afternoon." "We're going to learn how to walk properly." "Walk?" "Oh, you're joking." "Can't wait." "Good, good." "I thought I had it mastered and, um, I've been under the impression for the last 30 years that I've been quite good at walking." "Just like the men, the women also need to make themselves irresistible... no easy task with just one bath a week." "As the highest-ranking lady in the house, real-life Countess Griaznov is the first to enjoy this precious ritual..." "Regency bathwear and all." "It's so amazing." "I can't tell you." "It's just incredible." "When you're in a bath, you feel relaxed, because you're yourself and it's just you naked and it doesn't seem any different because it's just you." "But if you're somebody covered in this strange-looking, wet material, it's like some strange sort of erotic experience." "The ladies spend much of the day trying to improve their looks with primitive cosmetics." "In her room, the countess is joined by Miss Conick... a lady of modest means..." "to try out Regency shampoo... a soufflé of egg whites rinsed with rum and rose water." "Going somewhere nice this summer?" "So, if you're a Regency lady, then, you... you know, your looks are vital." "So you probably did have to put yourself through all these weird and wonderful treatments." "God knows how they managed with eggs and rum, I don't know." "This is what... the place that I haven't got to yet, how crucially important it would have been for somebody like me to be playing this mating game, because if I didn't get married then, I mean, I have no fortune." "I have no money." "My situation is that if I don't get married, um, this season, then, um, I think I'm basically an... an impoverished old maid." "I think of it like a business contract, and you have to land the best business contract to get ahead." "That's the only way you can think about it, because if you think about it involving emotions, then it would just be too awful." "It's like.." "It's glue..." "it's glue." "I'm covered in glue." "Tightening of the lace on a corset puts an accent on the bosom, which nature has formed in perfect symmetry." "A point not lost on the nouveau riche Miss Hopkins." "It's, um, an amazing feat." "You know, out here your cleavage is a status, and you kind of, you know, the..." "And you are really conscious of it, because there are girls in the house that have got bigger chests than I have, and, uh, so you do become, like, really conscious of it, and you keep hitching them up." "who's got the biggest, you know, cleavage." "And so it is quite a feminine..." "It's your only weapon for the men, because you know what does it for them." "Good afternoon, gentlemen." "Good afternoon." "Fine body of men here." "I'm going to suggest that you seat yourselves down there." "Men ate and drank to excess." "Yet a strong and manly figure was much prized." "Byron exercised daily to work off the ravages of the night before." "After all, your looks told the world who you were." "As you are walking backwards and forwards, you must put yourself under constant surveillance." "What impact are you making that will... will single you out from the lower orders who will slouch around and take an inferior part in the world?" "Captain Glover is taking to this philosophy with a passion." "What I find with this lifestyle is that it's got much more emotional range." "And a round of applause." "It's a very interesting contrast and making yourself look..." "look pretty and beautifying yourself, and all this way that we stand and..." "I mean, our clothes are amazing." "Coupled with the masculinity, I think that's..." "They were obviously men of more extremes than maybe we... we are now in the modern world." "Think of your footfall." "Walking with poise, or pedestrianism, was regarded as a gentlemanly art... something Captain Robinson is uncomfortable with." "I don't want to walk like this and like this." "I don't." "It's creeping me out trying to." "I don't want to be posh." "I want to stay rooted." "and I'm meant to be fiercely proud of my roots." "is it's making me fiercely proud of my roots." "Nice, steady, long steps." "Concentrate on them." "While the men and women preen themselves, the lady's companion can only watch from the sidelines." "Miss Francesca Martin spends her time running errands for the hostess, like arranging the seating plan for dinner." "that the professor of sport, um, is joining us for dinner, and according to the protocol of the time, it simply would not have been right for Miss Martin, um, to have dinner with us." "My feeling is that that's quite right." "I wasn't actually going to come down for dinner but the other ladies apparently felt that it was my first night and how shocking that I would be left in my room." "So that was kind of nice, because I got a sympathy vote without actually feeling like I really deserved it." "Ah!" "Ah!" "Now, let's see." "It says here, doesn't it?" "Perhaps they've all got things." "Please come in." "Um..." "Um, I've just been told by Mr. Daly that I'm to ask you every day whether I'm coming down for dinner." "Yes, but we're a bit busy" "Could we perhaps discuss this later, Miss Martin?" "Okay, how... how many minutes?" "Just a half an hour, or..." "I'll let you know." "Okay, thanks very much." "It just seems that no one really cares, and I'm just sort of left wandering around, feeling like an absolute twit by myself, alone again." "And even all the other girls look at me weirdly." "I mean, "Are you coming down to dinner?"" ""I don't know what's going on."" "At the hostess's insistence," "Miss Francesca dines in her room alone." "She's excluded from the heart of the Regency day... the moment when men and women came together to display themselves to one another." "I really like Robinson's waistcoat." "Upstairs Miss Francesca has to rely on the servants" "Yeah, yesterday all the men sat round a table and they were writing in the book who they fancied." "Because Mr. Robinson spends all his time with Jack, and said, "I'm going to let you write for me."" "And Jack just said to, you know, him, "Miss Martin?"" "And he just went, "Very good, Jack."" "He had this massive grin on his face." "Having a suitor would have been a godsend for the likes of poor Miss Francesca." "If she can tempt the captain into marriage, she'll be made for life." "Captain Glover has arranged an early wake-up call." "Morning, Captain." "Ready for your training, sir?" "Just get yourself dressed, sir, and we'll go out." "The professor's assistant, Mr. Dean, has come to give him some extra training..." "Regency style." "I think exercise should be put to a purpose, and I guess if we're, uh, riding the horses, shoveling their is part of the..." "the balance, isn't it?" "The men have decided to hold a grand contest so they can challenge each other on the sports field." "is hoping to steal a march on his opponents." "Oh, morning, Gorell Barnes." "This is quite amusing." "You've got to watch this." "We got to slightly worry" "Captain Glover is shoveling... literally." "With a brutal frankness, people in this society were made to feel their origins." "Captain Robinson is realizing just how difficult life could be for the upwardly mobile." "He should be looking for a wealthy wife but feels more at home with that other outsider, Miss Francesca." "I can't do it." "I can't..." "I can't play the game." "You don't need to play the game." "It's not a game." "in this house with these grounds." "I should have been a footman, and maybe that's quite interesting because of my background." "I should have been a footman, but I was lucky enough to get invited to a party." "Because I need to have my pulse on everything." "When the hostess gets wind of their budding romance," "But for a lady's companion in the 19th century," "I do feel her behavior is totally inappropriate." "Would you like a written report, ma'am," "If he's behaving naughtily with somebody," "I need to know, um, and warn him that it's not, um," "I think the word is "commensurate"" "with his position, and it could jeopardize, you know, everything for him." "Hello, Mrs. Rogers." "No, well, I was taking a walk, and he was as well, so..." "Okay." "I'm getting a bit bored with people not trying hard enough." "People need a jolt and to be reminded that they need to think about what they're doing here." "The only escape from this suffocating life something that was becoming fashionable for the first time." "Country estates were being landscaped into untamed wildernesses." "The best were equipped with that disciple of nature, the hermit." "I've been a hermit in..." "sort of in all but name in various occasions in my life." "I fell into the possession of a huge red Indian tent that you have a big fire in the middle of, um, when I was in my very early 20s." "I used to live in it every summer, on various people's land." "And the people who owned the land used to, uh, come up and... and visit with..." "with friends, sort of, before dinner with a drink in their hands." "And is... it was exactly the way the hermit was shown off, you know, treated like a proper, well-loved family pet." "Artist Zebedee Helm is following in a humble tradition of lovelorn poets, philosophers and religious men who chose the hermit life." "Quite rude and simple, but there's enough there, I think, to support a man in the wilds for two months." "Advertisements for hermits often stipulated that they grow their hair and fingernails, take port with their master weekly and jump out of bushes to scare the ladies." "I'm extremely jealous of the people living in the house, with their lovely food and their fancy clothes." "But I enjoy this style of life, and so I think it's important for me to try and make them as jealous as possible of what I've got." "You know, you want what you can't have... or you think you do." "Um, and that's what I represent." "Yeah, a wild heathen fantasy." "The worship of nature was considered good for the soul... the more tempestuous, the better." "We have an example of Josiah Eaton, who, again, moving the..." "Two miles away." "The storm is a chance to show off their Regency bravado, essential training for the forthcoming contest." "Fancy a box?" "Yes." "But the power of nature has made little impression on Captain Robinson." "I want to go home." "And if I can't go home, I'll just go mad." "It's, like, the days here are really cool and, um... we do really cool stuff." "And then we have this three-hour meal, and depending on who you're sitting next to, it could be quite a nice experience or the most drawn-out, long, boring experience ever." "It's like coming home from a..." "a, like, good day at work and watching the same video every night." "And eventually it just, like, gets really boring." "The other outsider, Miss Francesca, is last in line" "She's obliged to use a stranger's dirty water." "Oh, whose bath water was it?" "Is it very dirty?" "Do I just literally get in?" "Yeah." "It's actually weirder getting in with a chemise." "If I don't say yes to this bath..." "the bath water..." "So..." "I can't be bothered to get upset about little things." "It's more sort of the big things that upset me... like Captain Robinson today was upsetting." "I pretty much spend every evening with him, and so I... that would be awful... you know, it would just be such a shame to lose him." "It would be gutting." "There's no chance of losing Captain Glover;" "I think we will become gentlemen." "I think we will take a lot of these lessons on board, embrace them and we will change." "between a gentleman and a... and a dandy, or a man of fashion." "A gentlemen doesn't act the part; he is the part, and I think that's what we're starting to learn." "Breathe, sir." "I mean, this is all alpha-male, alpha-female stuff, isn't it?" "It's not just the best-looking but the healthiest and the fittest and the most sharpest of mind." "And a lady will find that attractive." "You know, it's basic instinct, isn't it?" "Stand still." "That evening, the hostess agrees to a game of outdoor sardines... and events take a turn that could change Captain Robinson's fortunes forever." "Three... two... one... go!" "Four... five... six..." "Go!" "False start." "The guests head for the bushes in the hope of enjoying some forbidden intimacy." "Have fun." "See you soon." "Yeah." "when I was a teenager, and you were really hoping that, you know, you might be squeezed close to, um, the boy that, you know, you were fancying." "Making the most of the opportunity," "Captain Robinson seeks out Miss Francesca, and there... abandoning all hope of social advancement... he makes an offer." "It's just been announced." "You do know, it's at a very early stage, but the intention is there is an understanding between Captain Robinson and Miss Francesca of a marital type, but of course it has to be cleared with, uh, Mrs. Rogers, who's sort of... who are kind of guardians, employers?" "We're going to have a wedding." "Fantastic." "This man..." "Hug." "This man is a fantastic man." "Cheers, mate." "The Regency world revolved around engagement, the defining moment of a person's life." "Bagging an army captain is a step up the social ladder for Miss Francesca." "But the hapless captain has let his heart rule his head." "I don't know if this is ethical or if this is allowed to happen or any of this is allowed to be done, but I think it's brilliant that he said that if he could marry her that he'd be very happy to spend the next nine weeks here." "Um, I always wanted a Las Vegas-style wedding... and, um..." "Miss Francesca, will you marry me?" "Yes, sir." "Thank you." "It's the morning after Miss Francesca's engagement to Captain Robinson." "It's time to get up, ma'am." "Today the men are hunting rabbits." "Missed it!" "The hawks are soon abandoned in favor of a liquid breakfast." "But Captain Robinson's sobering up." "Marriage of convenience, I think, was happening, but I don't know who it was convenient for" "I don't think I'm getting anything out of it, am I?" "No." "I think the point's been made here:" "If you're flirting with the other ladies, it's not going to look right and you'll have the wrath of Mrs. Rogers because you're now engaged to be married, that's all." "A Regency engagement was legally binding." "If broken, the injured party could sue." "But it did allow men and woman to touch." "You can touch some skin, can you?" "I can go like this." "The ladies are enjoying a breakfast ball, the Regency equivalent of a pajama party." "For Miss Francesca, the gravity of her new situation is beginning to hit home." ""Oh, you know, let's get married, let's get married."" "And I was, like, "Okay."" "And... and then he asked me to get married, and... and then it did actually just spiral out of control" "And I woke up this morning with a ring on my finger, going, "That was a big night."" "So..." "In first position." "It was very difficult last night when the engagement was announced..." "for me." "if Captain Robinson for any reason broke off the engagement, he would be a ruined man, because that was just a complete no-no." "The ladies are going on a picnic." "And Captain Glover intensifies his training regime." "The size of his fortune won't impress the ladies, so he's banking on his sporting prowess." "Whew!" "Too many cigars and port." "A purging sweat was the key to success for gentlemen and racehorses alike, brought on by a brew of hot cider, coriander and caraway." "the warming effects of the potion begin to take effect." "It tastes worse than it sounds." "To increase the effects of this sweating draft," "Captain Glover dons extra layers of clothing and is tucked up in bed." "It's hotter than a beach in Ibiza." "Now to just lie here and try and go to sleep." "While Captain Glover sweats it out, the hostess sends Miss Francesca to take some food to the hermit." "Would you like some help, ma'am?" "There's actually been rumors about the hermit, that possibly the hermit might be an attractive man, so they're a bit jealous." "I'm very loyal to Captain Robinson." "I'm sure that it won't affect our engagement." "Obviously he's got more to offer than, you know..." "I might have to consider things a bit." "Oh, hello, nice to meet you." "Nice to meet you, too." "Um, we've brought you some fresh eggs and things." "So I hope you've actually got some way of using them." "Don't know whether you can cook them up." "I've got a fully operational kitchen over there." "Oh, wow!" "Okay." "Yeah, well, why?" "That's what I want to know maybe." "I think everyone's a bit curious about why you've chosen a hermit life." "Um... well, it's more it chose me, really." "Yeah, it's sort of maybe my destiny." "But it's... you know, it's been nice to see a lady." "I saw the master yesterday and..." "Apart from that, it's been extremely quiet." "Well, I'm sure if I report back, you might see a few more ladies curiously walking here." "That's not a problem." "I'm always... always open to..." "to visitors." "Hello, ladies." "I can't believe you just so blatantly..." "Is he as pretty as we've been told?" "He is quite an attractive man." "Very rugged-looking as you can imagine." "Manly... sitting on his veranda." "He sounds amazing." "because he does it sort of every sort of summer and..." "Probably he's gay." "Or married." "He can't be married..." "he's a hermit." "After her visit to the hermit, Miss Francesca takes a decision that would have ruined her in Regency eyes." "She breaks off her engagement to Captain Robinson." "We've come in here tonight to...... um, explain the reasons why our engagement might perhaps not work." "Um, behind me sits a man, a man gone crazy." "Um... and basically I think that he's accepting diminished responsibility?" "I think that, yeah." "I think definitely." "Diminished responsibility, plus a small amount of alcohol, uh, which did lead us to a crazy night of Las Vegas fun, uh, which we have to now take back." "And we... we have to go and have a chat with Mrs. Rogers..." "We do; we have to go and speak to Mrs. Rogers." "To make this official." "To break off the engagement." "And you give your blessing for me to marry a much richer and much..." "A much what?" "The hermit." "You see, he's not much richer;" "he's much better looking." "Yeah." "You can't have two." "Come here, little fishy." "Come here, little fishy." "Come to Daddy." "That's good." "Plant your feet firmly." "The gentlemen have been training all week for their athletics contest." "Today they will compete in a series of challenging pedestrian events, and as usual" "Captain Glover is putting in the extra effort." "Regency trainers believed that too much sleep was bad for an athlete's performance." "Captain Glover has woken early to spend his last few hours of rest in a hammock, the body could relax and exercise simultaneously." "I'm delighted with my fitness regime, Mr. Dean." "Um, an hour of this a day?" "Is that it?" "Right, let's do it, then." "For the day's sport, the gentlemen have split into two teams." "Mr. Everett will partner Captain Glover." "Okay, boys, this is exactly what I needed." "Their opponents, Mr. Gorell Barnes and Mr. Foxsmith, to establish what's acceptable for a gentleman when it comes to dirty tricks." "That would be to your liking?" "Um, but we need to, I think, conclude the details of it." "What about if I just give him a kicking?" "I reckon I could take him." "Or you can simply make it very simple." "When it comes to dirty tricks," "Captain Glover is already one step ahead." "He feels that he can do it, but we have an idea there's something else in there that he hasn't... hopefully, won't have contemplated." "So we need... we need to give him false hope, if you like." "The trick is to try and work out where they might be coming from, and think even smarter." "I think you get whatever advantage you can" "Whether it's honorable or not, I'm not so sure." "I don't think it was written in the rules anywhere that you couldn't listen to what other people were discussing, so I don't think I've broken any rule." "Others are breaking the rules." "Mr. Ball, the house steward, alerts Mrs. Rogers." "We haven't been able to find Miss Francesca, um, for most of the morning, and..." "Has she gone up to see the hermit again?" "We believe she did say to the son of staff that she was going to spend some time by the river." "I don't know whether we ought to send someone out to try and find her, or what we really need to do on that one." "I mean, she's probably just forgotten." "She's very young." "But it still isn't being a Regency lady's companion." "I think it's very irresponsible and, you know, unthinking." "It is a way of escaping any duties she might have, which really isn't quite the idea." "The athletics contest is about to begin." "May the most honorable gentleman win." "Absolutely." "I just think it's brilliant that they're all strutting around pretending that they're not particularly taking it very seriously, and they're all desperately trying to win." "It's classic alpha-male stuff..." "you know, take off the jacket, strut around in the rain with your white shirt on, and it's classic." "Mr. Gorell Barnes is preparing his teammate, Mr. Foxsmith, for the first event of the day..." "a traditional Regency sack race." "Captain Glover is psyching up his teammate, Mr. Everett." "Captain Robinson is struggling to conceal his indifference." "Gentlemen, crossing and jostling is permitted." "Ladies could wager small stakes on their favorite gentleman." "I'm betting on Foxsmith to win." "I'm doing, um, Everett again." "Mr. Everett has got to win something." "I feel he's going to be very talented inside a sack." "God, did I say that?" "!" "You think that Mr. Everett would be good in the..." "in the sack?" "I think Mr. Foxsmith will be very feisty in the sack." "I don't know what you're talking about." "Gentlemen, are you ready?" "Time!" "Lady Devonport, I'm afraid your steed is tiring." "Look fresh, look fresh, okay?" "Bye-bye, Foxsmith, bye-bye!" "Come on, the gods!" "And we have a victor." "You should have bet more money." "The first round goes to Captain Glover and Mr. Everett." "Captain Robinson has made a decision." "It started off with homesickness." "I just was getting really, really blue, and then... so I set the wheels in motion and told myself that's..." "that's the answer." "And the group of men I was hanging around didn't like..." "It's just simple, little things, but didn't like football as much as I did, so I couldn't talk to them about it, you know, and..." "For gentlemen, it's..." "it's, like, you can pretty much do what you want all day and everyone probably would like to do that... unlimited money and just do what you want." "And yet it's not actually that much fun, which is quite weird, you know." "even if it's just watch TV, which is ironic, isn't it?" "As Captain Robinson prepares to move on, so does his former fiancée." "?" "Poor... unfortunate hermit. ?" "?" "It's so hard being a hermit. ?" "Why... why don't you write a musical called The Hermit?" "Because it wouldn't sell." "I mean, it doesn't have to be based on me as a hermit, but just..." "I think..." "I think hermits" "Okay, call it The Lady's Companion." "Sadly, they don't have a future." "No, but they've got a past." "Ooh!" "Ooh!" "The sporting events continue with fiendish races, ranging from walking backwards every fourth step to a grueling relay known as the hundred stones." "Think of that third eye." "Firm pace, good." "We like it." "That's nice, that's nice." "Swooning over his lovely wet shirt." "Not that we're looking at it at all." "As the ladies look on in admiration, some of them are beginning to reveal their romantic preferences." "about people wearing other people's colors." "And, uh, Miss Braund's wearing all blue with little blue beads." "He's wearing a blue sash." "Massage, please, Miss Braund." "Miss Braund has high hopes for Captain Glover, whose color she's been sporting." "I was not wearing a blue necklace for any particular reason." "Um, I was wearing it purely because I have so little jewelry" "One of my nicer things is a blue-beaded necklace and I've got a blue dress on." "That was purely it." "Come in." "Mrs. Rogers." "I'm here." "Um, where have you have been all day?" "Um, I went to the river today." "Um, did you tell anybody?" "Um, I did." "I told the other girls." "Well, I don't think you did, because I've asked several people." "No one knew where you were at all." "I really thought everyone knew" "Well, you didn't leave me a message." "Did you actually ask anyone" "No, I'm sorry I didn't, Mrs. Rogers." "It's not acceptable behavior, um, to just not think about anybody else." "It really isn't, you know, the way to behave at all." "Sorry." "I'm not used to it." "No one ever cares in my real life, so I never normally, you know..." "just don't think about it." "Gentlemen!" "Quarter past five!" "With the scores equal, ultimate victory hangs on one final endurance event." "The pedestrians must complete a quarter mile every 15 minutes for five consecutive hours." "After all his preparation, will this be Captain Glover's finest hour?" "he receives a challenge from the most unlikely quarter." "who's made clear his contempt for pedestrianism, steps in for the host in a bid for final glory." "Just give me a bit of shade there," "After five long hours it's time for the final quarter-mile leg, and this one is a sprint." "Gentlemen." "Quarter to seven." "Time!" "I'll back anything that Captain Robinson is in." "I was watching him from my bedroom window." "He's a natural athlete." "Like a good show pony, he is." "Captain Glover is limping." "Is he limping again?" "Well, if he was a horse," "I'd probably have him put down." "He's doing well." "Despite, or perhaps because, of all his training, he's pulled his calf muscle." "Come on, Captain Glover." "You can do it." "You keep going, keep going." "Come on, Captain!" "Come on, Captain Glover!" "Come on, Captain Glover, you can do it." "Just finish." "A round of applause, Glover." "because I think he's been taken to training and stuff and, you know, he wanted to put in a good show and I just think that's such a shame." "More disappointing than frustrating." "I mean, it's the taking apart that counts, and I've taken myself apart." "I did miss the end." "He's done so much training and stuff and he's limping really badly." "I just think it's a bit of a shame, because it's been a really, lovely day." "And end it on a sad note either." "Yeah, but tomorrow is another day." "Oh, classic line there." "We lost." "Very much so, very much so." "Later that night Miss Braund, with the help of Miss Hopkins, and ventures into the men's quarters." "Just... no, leave it on the bed." "There she rewards Captain Glover with a token of her affection." "I reached a peak today, and go out on a high, that's what I say." "I dedicate my sports victory to the footmen... the working class." "Next time, stir up the gothic, mix in the erotic..." "Stop sneaking a peek!" "Add a dash of decadence..." "To Lord Byron." "A dose of innocence..." "I don't know who's left me a daisy chain on my bed." "And simmer." "She just kept grabbing me and grabbing me." "She was behaving like a child." "It's a recipe for romance." "I've just been given another note." "Next time at the Regency House Party." "Jane Austen, it ain't." "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "When ten single men and women go back 200 years in time to look for romance, what can you expect?" "Bottoms up." "Stop sneaking a peek!" "We've been good little girls." "We've gone to bed at 11:00." "We've not been drinking the alcohol." "It's time for us to have some fun." "Decadence..." "To Lord Byron!" "And a few fireworks." "They were really laying into each other." "I reacted by smacking her." "It's "Mad, Bad..."" "Ladies..." ""And Dangerous Liaisons."" "I'd like feel that the chances of you and me having sex are 99.9%." "Oh, I thought you'd never ask." "This time, at the Regency House Party." "are unbelievable, aren't they?" "Captioning sponsored by WNET Thirteen New York" "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "I woke up at 5:00 and it was fantastically beautiful out there." "And my natural thing would be to get up and put some clothes on and just go out of doors and be out of doors." "And I was really desperate to do that." "Chaperone and real-life aristocrat" "Elizabeth Lady Devonport is writing a poem reflecting on her life as a Regency woman." ""Poor caged lady, stroll and stride" ""To soothe the clever mind that you must hide" ""Poor caged lady, stroll and wince" "In your clothes that bind and your shoes that pinch."" "I couldn't go downstairs in anything other than my proper clothes because that would be against all the rules." "And I cannot get into my own clothes." ""Poor caged lady, stroll and play" "Waste away another day."" "And I felt for the women who from that time just... well, they didn't know any different, but just how awful to be made to be so incompetent." "For the younger women, like Countess Griaznov, life is even more constrained." "Every morning she has to report to her chaperone, Mrs. Rogers." "Good morning, how are you?" "I'm very well." "I don't enjoy being chaperoned, and last night we were sitting in the drawing room and, uh, I had my legs crossed and she was, like, "Legs crossed, uncross."" "And I did nearly kind of go," ""Much though I love you, Mrs. Rogers," "Girls lower down the pecking order, like Miss Lisa Braund, are yet more vulnerable to criticism." "To have somebody constantly watching you, watching how you're behaving to everybody else and correcting you on posture, the way you talk, how you use your hands..." "I'm really sorry but I can't wear that corset today." "I'm going to go downstairs and..." "Well, I'm afraid you can't, because you can't go down without me." "But I was going to get some food and get you a plate of food." "No, but you can't go down without me." "So I'm going to be stuck in here all day." "If she doesn't leave the room, I have to stay, too." "I could almost feel bad about this, but I have to look at the problems I've got." "I'm not happy about being up here all day." "You know, what will I do?" "But not leave the room?" "Surely I can leave, go downstairs into the library and go get a book or..." "Things are looking up right round here, aren't they?" "Lady Devonport is a more lenient chaperone." "She's being paid to get her wealthy charge," "Miss Victoria Hopkins, hitched to a man of superior class." "Lady Devonport is, um, a great woman and I think in here she's establishing a relationship of her own and maybe that has kind of distracted her attention away from me." "Miss Hopkins' chaperone is discovering something that was common knowledge among older ladies of the aristocracy:" "the attractions of a younger man." "No, but wouldn't you say I'm like Bond?" "No, I think you're more Byronic." "Byron was notorious for his affairs with older women." "His lovers included Lady Oxford, Lady Melbourne and Lady Frances Webber." "For some weeks now, Lady Devonport and Mr. Foxsmith have been spending more and more time together." "She's such a special person." "She's such an incredible person." "She's such a beautiful person." "I find young people much more open-hearted and much more sort of generally more kind of elevating to be around, more kind of alive-making really." "I'm sort of..." "like a sort of vampire, kind of sucking their youth off of them a bit, give me a bit more to keep me going a bit longer." "I don't really know what to do about the relationship between Lady Devon" "They are so indiscreet." "It is so obvious that really the two of them are only interested in each other." "Which does mean that Mr. Foxsmith has basically put himself out of the running for the girls." "Hostess Mrs. Rogers is concerned that Lady Devonport is ruining Mr. Foxsmith's chances with the younger women." "I generally find you attractive;" "you're vibrant, you're funny," "I can close my eyes and talk to you and, um... those things are the things" "I don't know, but lots of Regency men had older lovers," "And what could young men do?" "They couldn't go near the younger women." "If the young men weren't allowed near the young women, there was always manly exercise to take the mind off romance." "Skill at arms was still prized in the ongoing war against France where the cavalry remained an important fighting force." "Go, go, go..." "Brilliant!" "God, he's good at that." "I got François," "I got Pierre and I've got Jean-Paul." "Go, go, go." "Could we spread around the girls as much as possible?" "They've all been watching in the bushes." "Have they?" "I want to make as much deal about it as possible." "I want you to go on and on about it." "Definitely don't feel that I've got to know most of the men that well." "We don't see them during the day because they're off galloping and stuff." "And it's quite odd that the idea was to try and get men and women together, but you don't see them at all." "It's just bizarre." "your chaperone's trying to keep you apart anyway, so how they ever got married is a mystery really." "Stunts like these gave a man the chance to cut a dash and show off his gentlemanly prowess." "Whoa, whoa, whoa..." "Whoa." "Where am I going?" "Despite all the barriers, interest between the sexes is about to ignite." "Nice effort!" "Jolly good effort." "I'm quite interested in a young lady in the house" "And she's... she's an extremely attractive woman," "I mean, she's a strong woman." "In Regency terms, Miss Hopkins' wealth would be the perfect complement to Mr. Everett's old family connections, but he's letting his affections stray to one of the less eligible women of the party." "Been told that there's another girl who quite likes me." "And also who I really like, too." "She's... she's a smashing woman, um, Miss Braund." "She's wonderful, you know, talented, very, you know, she's lovely." "So I'm sort of, you know, in a bit of a... bit of a sort of a, you know, what-should-I-do kind of thing, bit of a... bit of a fork in the road." "To give his younger guests a chance to get to know each other better, master of the house, Mr. Gorell Barnes, has proposed a walk." "Protocol allows that if a walk is of sufficient distance, the young ladies may be unchaperoned." "Four girls and three boys." "HAMMOND Four girls and three boys?" "Hmm, that's quite interesting, isn't it?" "Still, that's built in chaperonage, isn't it?" "Delighted to see the back of them," "I didn't have to worry where anybody was and I could have an afternoon with my girlfriends." "Well, I feel massively relieved:" "They're off my hands, they're not my responsibility." "It was the host's idea." "If anything goes wrong, he can sort it out and get the guilty parties married." "Mrs. Enright's charge, 25-year-old Miss Conick, is the youngest girl of the party." "I'm finding the chaperoning fine because Mrs. Enright and I get on very, very well." "I never thought we would, we're from such different worlds," "I just didn't think we'd click." "I think we've got a mutual respect, which means that I know how far I can take things, and she knows how far I will take things." "Well, they're not letting us run wild, are they?" "None of us are, though, none of us would be." "It's a bit disappointing." "Come in." "Oh, that kind of a drink, how wonderful." "If I was on this walk this afternoon," "I would spend the whole walk fainting and dropping my hankie in front of Mr. Gorell Barnes, quite a..." "That's what I would be doing, repeatedly." "Mr. Foxsmith is actually a better looking man than Mr. Gorell Barnes..." "Not in my book." "formally speaking, bone for bone, oh, yes." "Exactly, if I was doing breeding," "Yes, and he's got a bigger, better torso." "That's better breeding stock, isn't it, Lady Devonport?" "You're shocking me, dear." "The walking party return." "No reputation has been damaged." "Then again, no relationships have been formed." "The chaperones have kept their girls in order, but they have yet to play their part in getting the men and women together." "I think a lot of the young ladies are trying really hard, but they're not getting any direction from the chaperones." "If I was a chaperone, I tell you what." "I'd be doing a hell of a lot more to try and get my charge... so... because I've got..." "only got six weeks left and if I don't get her married, then when I get back, I've failed." "Mr. Gorell Barnes takes the chaperones to task." "difficult thing to do, but I think we need to think about being slightly more creative as to... where they may meet the men, and the men meet the ladies." "And I think that the whole emphasis of trying to get your charge married needs to be thought about." "But..." "I know exactly what you're saying, but we're dealing with, you know, 28-year-old, 29-year-old smart-asses." "I know it's very, very difficult because of... people might not like each other, but they need to try and..." "To try and get" "I think that you might find that the young ladies are less compliant than we are." "I'm happy to have the same conversation with them if you think that's a good idea." "Women... are unbelievable, aren't they?" "It's just..." "God." "I'm sure that Victoria would say" "I've been a really useless chaperone," "I've never been there for her, blah-di-blah." "But if I had been more in her face," "I think she would have had me for lunch." "You know, there was no way that I could have been more in her face than I was, and it would have been tolerated." "A further frustration to any possibility of romance:" "while the men are allowed to stay up and party, at 11:00 the women are escorted to bed." "It's a firm rule:" "once the chaperones have retired, no woman is allowed downstairs." "Have you done the other one?" "Stop sneaking a peek... footman." "And I want the countess up here now, please." "I will go and try and find her." "I'm getting cross." "Okay, I'll try and find her." "It's nothing to do with you..." "Hostess Mrs. Rogers suspects Gorell Barnes might be taking advantage of his position" "I am meant to be the one in charge of morals in this house, not you, and I do not think it is appropriate for the countess to be in your room when everybody else is in bed." "In my room?" "Where else has she come from?" "I was standing in the porch..." "Well, I mean, I think it's just not right." "I was standing in the porch and I asked Mr. Gorell Barnes was anybody in the porch, because I wanted to go outside." "If I allow my charge to go off at night when all the other girls have gone to bed, it just looks really bad on you." "With frustrations between the sexes being felt in the Regency House, host Mr. Gorell Barnes leads his guests to Sunday church." "Affluent Regency gentlemen were not, on the whole, a religious lot, but they were great respecters of duty, money and status." "So Mr. Gorell Barnes rides at the head of the procession with Mr. Everett, the second- richest man of the party." "The lower ranking men and women are left to walk behind." "For Regency women, churchgoing provided an opportunity to exhibit modesty, virtue and piety." "These attributes, coupled with virginity, were deemed a potent lure for any man." "Here you all are, and you've made a commitment to the project of the Regency House Party out of the desire to discover another way of looking at relationships and out of a hope which you may find someone" "In the 21st century, you meet somebody and you might, you know... in bed with them in a few hours, whereas here it takes a lot..." "a lot longer, so you're, yes, one's attitude to women has changed a lot." "Not for you the chance encounter which leads to an experiment in relationship." "I do feel quite stifled and smothered and constricted." "Definitely the more time I spend in here, the more I realize how important love and affection is in my life." "I can't describe the emotion..." "You can't hug people, you can't... you can't just go like this because it's these bloody stupid..." "Regency bloody rules." "In Regency times, the repressed longings being felt by our house party found a macabre release." "The world of Gothic novels, with their ghosts, demons and vampires excited frustrated desires." "On his way to the house is a companion of these dark realms." "Anyone here interested in hearing a review of The Monk:" ""Lust, murder, incest, necrophilia" ""and every atrocity that can disgrace human nature" ""are brought together without the apology of probability or even possibility for their introduction."" "Oh, good." "Though scandalous," "The Monk, by Matthew Lewis, was popular with the ladies." ""He caught her hand, forced her upon his knee" ""and gazing upon her with gloating eyes" ""he thus replied to her, ¡No, Antonia, never, never." "I swear it by this kiss and this, and this.'"" "You know, monks disguise themselves, and raping and pillaging and all the rest of it." "It's, uh, certainly very black, very dark." "And Jane Austen it ain't." "I think that, um, young girls at the period enjoyed reading these scary Gothic novels because they so singularly lacked any physical excitement and the thrill of horror is something, well, physical." "I mean, they were just like books on the top shelf that your parents tell you not to read, they're for grown-ups... you know, excellent manuals on how to do sex." "The mystery visitor arrives." "Kim Newman is a Gothic author and horror film writer." "While he would have been a great celebrity in the Regency, having him to the house would have been considered very risqué." "And of course since the Goths were the barbarians who overthrew the Roman Empire, yeah, signing yourself up with them or, you know, the vandals or whatever, was... was, I don't know, like adopting punk rock, you know." "It was like whatever your parents were going to hate," "Gorell Barnes is hoping to use Kim Newman's knowledge of Regency Gothic to stir things up among his younger guests." "To bring further excitement to Gothic night," "Mr. Gorell Barnes has hired a traveling light show." "Phantasmagoria was the Regency equivalent of horror cinema." "That is cool." "Gorell Barnes has decreed that everyone should dress up for his Gothic banquet." "Fancy dress or masks allowed young people to do what was not normally allowed." "I think we go next door." "Mr. Gorell Barnes takes full advantage of his disguise to get up close to the countess." "On the menu, milk-fed sucking pig in a pickled prune sauce... and a Gothic jelly of dark fruits." "That stake should be in his eye." "The approved method of killing vampires at this time was with a nail through the eye." "Was it?" "That's why I'm still alive." "The stake... the stake was a bit déclassé." "It was only... sort of Transylvanian peasants got that." "Were there any vampires around at the Regency?" "There was a short story called "The Vampire"" "by a strange man called Dr. Polidori." "And that's the first proper vampire story in English." "are basically imitations and rip-offs of it." "Dr. Polidori's vampire was, in fact, a poorly disguised portrait of Regency bad boy Lord Byron." "And it's where we get our notion of the romantic vision the thin, sallow-cheeked, attractive aristocratic person, as opposed to the, you know, the smelly cannibalistic peasant which was the previous folkloric version of the myth." "Oh, and of course women as well were, you know, seen as vampiric or blood draining." "Ladies and gentlemen, walk right this way for Cupid's Magick Lantern show." "Argh, what a horrible sight!" "The British aristocracy en masse..." "look at them." "Let's have a closer look at you." "To the women, now accustomed to the polite restraint the phantasmagoria is something of a shock to the system." "For full surround effects, water, imitating blood, is splashed from behind." "Well, I see my time on this earth is nearly over." "I say goodbye and return to subterranea." "Events like this provide a rare opportunity for the women to let themselves go in the company of the men." "Be ready for me, as I'm a-coming." "In this world of constrained feelings, music plays an essential role." "The haunting strains of the glass armonica had been popular since the 18th century." "We've all been starved of music." "We really have music on in modern life almost constantly, and I'm just wondering has that added to the fact that everyone's very stressed?" "Playing music together was the approved channel by which men and women could hint at their feelings for one another." "In the Regency, a written declaration of feelings was tantamount to an offer of marriage." "Mr. Everett has made his move." "He's waiting to see how Miss Hopkins will respond." "Thank you very much." "that the chances of you and me having sex are pretty much 99.9%." "It's on my list of things to do." "I thought you'd never ask." "Oop." "With romance at last in their sights, in another fashionable Gothic pastime: women's archery." "Miss Victoria Hopkins has secretly scored a bull's-eye." "Last night she received a love token from Mr. Everett." "I do really, really like him." "I think he's an absolutely fantastic guy." "He's genuine, he's warm, he's funny, he's talented." "Miss Hopkins, she is a cracking girl." "She's great, you know." "She's a gorgeous girl." "Afternoon, Miss Braund." "Good afternoon." "Oh, you're in my spot." "Your spot?" "I sit here..." "I think it's my spot, too." "Yeah, it's been very pleasant, thank you." "Yeah, I've hit two of the targets, so I'm very happy." "Excellent... have a nice rest of the afternoon." "And you have a lovely afternoon." "Miss Braund is less of a catch than Miss Hopkins, but she does have one advantage:" "her chaperone is now devoted to the cause of securing Mr. Everett for her." "We're going to do a wonderful one called "And How We Cope With Being Bored."" "Amateur dramatics allowed for young people to get closer together, so Mrs. Hammond is staging a Gothic play." "She's asked Mr. Everett to be the producer." "I've got the giggles now." "She's got a beautiful singing voice so I've made sure that people hear her voice." "And when we were rehearsing, Mr. Gorell Barnes came out and, "Oh, who was that singing?"" ""It's my girl, it's Lisa, she was singing."" ""Ooh," you know, "it's a marvelous voice."" "So, we'll get her noticed." "There's too many people." "In the library they'll all hear it." "I think Mrs. Hammond takes her role as a chaperone very seriously and is anxious to do the absolute best she can for Miss Braund." "And Miss Braund will have an opportunity to show off her grace, charm and talent in the forthcoming show." "I think the positions are going to be this, that, and there..." "Okay, that's what we said, yeah." "So she's in the middle." "Yes, just... and not many of the others are singing." "Um, so she is." "In fact, there's only Mr. Everett who will be singing, I think." "Yes, only Mr. Everett will sing." "Mr. Everett and Miss Lisa Braund start work on the scenery." "As the second-richest man in the house," "Mr. Everett would be a good catch for Mrs Hammond's impoverished charge." "the color that I have chosen for the dress that I will never get." "You're doing a song, aren't you?" "I'm doing a song about a dress..." "Mrs. Hammond seems to have cut the other songs and perhaps only you are singing." "Oh, no, I'm really..." "Perhaps Lisa's meant to be showing off her talents and Mrs. Hammond's picking off, one by one," "Even if the countess had designs on Mr. Everett," "Mrs. Hammond has made sure the play won't offer her any advantages." "But she said, "What do you want to do, Countess, so I was just like, "Well, Countess Dracula perhaps."" "And she went, "Okay" and that's it." "So I spend the whole time in a coffin on stage like this." "Can't touch a man but I can bite his neck." "Mr. Everett, I think he's very, very funny." "I think what you see is what you get." "I think he's very up front." "Interesting bloke." "Really quite fascinating." "Come on, Miss Hopkins." "Give it some Wellie." "With two women on the go," "Mr. Everett could soon be faced with a choice." "Oh, please, Mr Everett." "Or has the choice been made for him?" "I got on really, really well with Mr. Everett when I first came in the house ooh, you know, this is going to go somewhere." "But I was walking round the garden and thought," "I don't think he's suited to me, he's more suited to Lisa." "and they are now spending quite a bit of time together" "And I really hope something does develop." "Because they're actually very, very well suited." "Oh, God, I'm in a sweat now." "Kind of turning into a bit of an Emma character in here, because, you know, I am so bored," "I need something to fill my time." "So I'm, uh, deciding to match-make, I think." "Mr. Everett has asked me, as his valet, to deliver this rather nice looking daisy chain and put it on Miss Braund's bed." "If we were to put, like, a heart shape, and then it can show..." "But Mr. Everett didn't actually ask for it to be a heart." "I don't want it to be too suggestive." "Yeah, you're right." "Or do you think on the pillow?" "Oh, that would be a good idea." "We could do a nice pattern." "We can do a swirl." "Yeah." "We can do it like this." "I think she'll be very happy." "Excellent." "I think that looks nice." "I want to make sure it looks really nice because he spent so long doing it." "because Mr. Everett actually asked me yesterday whether to put some flowers on Victoria's bed and now he seems to have changed his mind." "In the real life I send text messages all the time, and I'll get them all the time, and it's just... it's become the norm." "And here they of course didn't have mobile phones, so text... this is the text messaging of the time." "You send little notes via the footmen or the maids," "But didn't Victoria say something to you about..." "She did, she..." "Victoria..." "Miss Hopkins did ask me to..." "Because I, because I sort of..." "My eyes were so focused on Miss Hopkins that..." "And in fact she was right, because now I've... now I'm able to look at all the other girls as well, you know." "I don't know who's left me a daisy chain on my bed." "Isn't that cute?" "This place is getting out of hand." "And if any of the ladies here are upset because a man has made advances and then dumps her, you know, it's going to be pretty hellish for that guy to hang around here." "And, in fact, possibly untenable;" "he might have to leave." "Hmm, never thought of that." "So we're aware that we're behaving within a... within a smaller, tightly knit sort of community you've got to be respectful in terms of how you treat the ladies, and not lead them on if it's not intentional." "Two people for whom the Regency House is becoming an increasingly small place are Lady Devonport and Mr. Foxsmith." "My extremely lovely charge charged across the lawn and told me that people are saying that Mr. Foxsmith and I were caught fornicating upon the lawn last night and indeed bathing together in the stream on another occasion." "Well, I don't want to be sort of talking behind her back and I know there were outrageous people in the 19th century, but while she was in charge of somebody else's daughter... particularly on a fee-paying basis..." "the way I understand it, she would have bent over backwards to make sure that nothing was known." "I don't want you to think," ""I got stuck in too quickly with the old hag"" "when there's all these gorgeous things." "After all the rumors, Lady Devonport has decided the time has come to let Mr. Foxsmith go." "She'd like him to find a younger partner." "I can't bear to cramp your style when you're only going to be here" "Yeah, all of those girls are good-looking." "And they're intelligent." "And they're here to have fun." "I want to start a family now, and the person that I have kids with is the person that I'd like to stay with for the rest of my life." "I hope you do." "Yeah, um, in an ideal world." "Work on Mrs. Hammond's Gothic play is at last bringing the younger ladies and gentlemen together." "This is so satisfying." "Lady D. has done the horse." "It's so nice when you start crossing..." "That, that is all done." "Just seeing it all appear and everybody working on it, it's just the most phenomenal feeling." "I've never had it before;" "it's just wonderful." "Lady Devonport and Mr. Foxsmith are keeping a respectful distance." "She's doing her duty as a chaperone and promoting him to the younger women." "I have said to all the other chaperones, you know, that... that it might look like this is a closed shop, but it just is not." "The costumes have arrived." "Aah!" "Romantic rivals Miss Victoria Hopkins and Miss Lisa Braund have been out gathering props." "I want to talk to you about the little love triangle that seems to be going on." "I have had the best of intentions for Mr. Everett and Lisa and have tried honorably to get them together with no ulterior motive at all." "I just genuinely believed that they were a really suited couple." "Obviously Lisa's kind of letting her barriers down, has really, you know, begun to like him." "And I found out last night that he still likes me and that's put me in a really, really awkward position because I just don't know what to do really." "I mean, I do think he's a great guy, I mean, I..." "I don't know if there would be any potential future there or not." "I don't..." "I got a daisy chain on my bed but I don't know who that's from." "Lisa was left a daisy and buttercup chain in a spiral on her pillow." "We don't know who that's from." "I thought maybe one of the maids is messing around," "I don't think they would, because..." "The maids wouldn't do that, no." "But I was thinking maybe one of you girls just..." "No, not at all." "I've been too tired today." "It took me an hour to write a letter." "So, um, I don't know." "Don't know." "Quite confused on that one." "Hmm, I think it's Mr. Everett." "What Miss Hopkins knows and Miss Braund doesn't is that Mr. Everett has been sending love tokens" ""soon outweighed every other terror." "'I value not my life, ' said the stranger."" "Suddenly one of the girls will say something like," ""Oh, yes, he was asking after you earlier" or something." "And..." "I just feel excited and I feel..." "very girlie and it just makes the day go so quickly." "Looks like a sun to me." "You get a smile, it's all very pathetic and it's all very sweet and it's all very..." "It just, it just makes me feel girlie and... you know, fun." "It just seems really... and exciting and..." "Happy." "The countess." "Mrs. Hammond's plans to hitch Miss Braund to Mr. Everett appear to be working." "In plays, it was permitted to touch." "This, after all, is art." "You've got to help her up." "You've got to put her into a chair." "Come on, dear." "We'll try that catch again." "Okay." "You can slow it..." "Final rehearsals." "Mrs. Hammond's strategy is meticulous." "We're doing a play and we need you to be, um, my, uh, wife, if you like." "Is that okay?" "That's very okay, sir." "Very okay." "Like a stiff drink before the rehearsal?" "No, no, no." "If Miss Braund can't have the richest man in the house, no other woman can." "Mrs. Hammond's scripted Gorell Barnes to marry the night watchman." "I'm a bit nervous, I get stage fright." "I don't like performing in front of people, so I'm a bit nervous." "Glass of wine to calm my nerves, I'll be fine." "With the approach of curtain up, tension is mounting." "Miss Braund, Miss Braund." "Re nomine fatus rectum rectus requiem." "Re nomine fatus rectum rectus requiem." "Mrs. Hammond, like Jane Austen before her, has a satirical take on the Gothic." "My name is Mrs. Hammond." "Welcome to my house of horrors." "We are here to chill your blood, wobble your spine and make you tremble." "Today, everybody, I'd like to talk to you about an underrated neighbor of ours." "It's bats." "You can tell they're mammals because they don't have beaks and they do have firm breasts as well." "for at least one and a half hours every night." "I'm the Oracle of Kentchurch." "It's a very dull position." "My friends get hearts and flowers," "I get floppy hair because I sit in rain for hours." "And then I..." "I..." "Give me a prompt!" "He's my nearest neighbor and he's my best mate, and I'm a bloody great admirer of his big estate." "You may now kiss the bride." "Oh, dear." "Miss Braund really likes me." "I really like Miss Braund, too." "But I like Miss Hopkins." "I am a northern shepherdess who gets so little sleep." "Mine is not an ovine quest," "This woman is very powerful and you know, it's kind of scary, and that's kind of a turn-on." "You know what I mean?" "I have become demure and charming," "The change in me is quite alarming." "So here I am, a happy maid, my thoughts are now of trickery." "To read Lord Byron's wondrous sonnets and to search for silk to trim my bonnets." "Lisa's big moment has come." "?" "I've wept for years these tears, these tears ?" "?" "Will ere I find a fellow ?" "?" "Who will buy for me lovely finery ?" "?" "A dress of golden yellow. ?" "Lisa is over 30." "She would have been considered on the shelf by the time she was 27." "Making a good impression in situations like these could mean the difference between having a life or being condemned to the misery of Regency spinsterhood." "?" "...iris grows... ?" "She's still hoping to win Mr. Everett with her voice." "?" "I'd give my beauty mellow ?" "?" "My bell and bow ?" "?" "And my heart and soul ?" "?" "For my dress of golden yellow. ?" "Thank you." "Lisa is longing to know if it was Everett who left the daisies on her pillow." "Okay, what was the question?" "I've completely forgotten what it was." "Oh, come on, boring, boring." "It had to do with daisies." "I'm never going to talk to you ever again unless you... ask me the question." "Never again." "I'm in a bit of trouble, really, because, um, I fancy Miss Hopkins because she's a very attractive girl;" "so is Miss Braund a very attractive girl." "But it just happens that in the first few days me and Miss Hopkins sort of found a connection and, uh, and it's really difficult talking to the guys because..." "I probably shouldn't be saying this but, well, what the hell, I'm a bit pissed." "But you know, blatantly, me and Miss Hopkins have had a bit of a... bit of a snog on a couple of occasions." "Another love letter puts an end to all Lisa's hopes." "I've just been given another note." "There seems to be a bit of an exchange of notes between Hopkins and Everett this evening." "There's one from Hopkins just here and it's, uh, it's quite interesting." "It says, um, it says, "Mr. E., thank you for your note." ""I would like to say the feeling is mutual" ""and it's very hard that my loyalties are so divided." ""If I was allowed one wish in 2003, it would be" ""that I would fall asleep with arms wrapped around me" ""in the presence of someone who is as genuine as yourself." ""May you have sweet dreams." "Love, Miss V."" "The gentleman always has his lady on his right hand." "So will you gather your ladies, please?" "The men are taking lessons for the forthcoming grand summer ball." "Why do I always get the ugly one?" "More than just a social occasion, the ball is a hunting ground for a wife, and the gentlemen must perform." "Come on, darling." "Three, two, three... four, two, three... five..." "Dance allows a rare opportunity to touch, even hold a woman, so balls were eagerly awaited by everyone." "Mr. Foxsmith, is there... is there, um... have you found something unusual?" "Yes." "It's the whole experience, I'm afraid." "Are these the, um, designs that we've been waiting for, the book?" "Yes, ma'am." "While the gentlemen perfect their polonaise, designs for the latest ball gowns are delivered to Mrs. Rogers, the hostess." "I do like that gesture, though, of that lady." "There's a lady here standing very..." "Do look." "For the chaperones, the ball is the opportunity to show off their young charges to the most eligible men." "That kind of a headdress..." "So that's what you want?" "Do you think I should get my hair, um... because it's kind of curled, but it's curled around there." "All around here's sort of curled." "The rich girls will have new gowns, but the lowest-ranking, Miss Francesca, will have to restyle an old dress." "Miss Francesca, do you hear that?" "You could order trimmings as long as it was within your means, because the invoice is being sent, but you would have to do the trimming yourself." "Yeah, I think the countess and I are going to order new dresses." "As light as iron." "This is quite hard work." "Living in this age of excess, our young bloods, like their Regency forebears, work hard to get in shape for the ball." "Oh, God!" "Well, I think they're throwing sticks and, like, carrying sticks." "In an image-conscious age, their idols weren't footballers, but the taut, muscular bodies of classical statues." "Oh, look, Mr. Everett..." "He's going to snap!" "This is madness." "While the gentlemen work up a sweat, the ladies have needlework." "Supervised by the hostess, Mrs. Rogers, the young women must now spend four hours refining their feminine accomplishments." "Do go first." "Miss Braund is frustrated." "I wanted to watch what they were up to." "I feel like we've been told to come and sew now, and I find that quite difficult." "It's the being told thing that I suddenly went, "Hmm, okay."" "Not used to being told." "There's no question of joining the men." "Until dinner, they are trapped in each other's company." "I do find it quite difficult." "It's just getting used to the idea of getting used to other people." "And maybe it was like that in a Regency house party, because you can't escape anyone, and that's the feeling you do get, is this closeted society." "Regency men could work off their frustrations with vigorous sports, while women were forced to remain idle." "Doctors feared any strenuous activity would damage the womb." "The gentlemen's personal trainer, Mr. Dean, is putting them through a fitness regime that includes a popular obsession of the age... purging." "Today, we're going to give you an emetic which will make you sick, thus aiding your fitness." "Well, we haven't been drinking or eating bad impurities, honestly." "That I don't believe for a minute, Captain." "It will feel similar to about a hundred sit-ups afterwards." "Will it?" "Indeed, on your stomach." "That's good for your stomach?" "So we could end up with a six-pack?" "You could indeed, yeah, a Regency six-pack." "Everett, could you prepare a toast, please?" "To Mr. Dean, our good friend and trainer." "Cheers." "Cheers." "Yeah, whoosh, over the shoulder." "How many times do we do this?" "What are you trying to do, make us sick or something?" "Even an emetic would come as welcome relief from the regime endured by the women." "And it's not only the young charges that find it suffocating." "This is like being in a prison;" "it is a gilded cage, it is." "I feel like I'm in hospital the whole time." "Do you?" "It's a very bizarre feeling." "I cannot stand the restraints and the restrictions, and if I can't stand them, how the hell am I going to persuade a 29-year-old girl to stand them?" "I love this experience..." "Do you?" "Apart from my charge..." "that's the irony." "What I don't love is the complete ignorance and inability for my charge to appreciate anything I try to do for her... so I'm actually not going to try and do any more for her." "Three weeks of appeasement." "The most she does is get into a Regency frock... that's it." "That's as Regency as she'll get." "I'm going to go downstairs and, uh, get some breakfast." "Well, I'm afraid you can't, because you can't go down without me." "I was going to get some food and then..." "The problems with her charge, Miss Braund, started one day when Mrs. Hammond could not leave her room." "So you're stuck here as well." "So I'm going to be stuck in here all day?" "If she doesn't leave, I have to stay, too?" "that I'd have to be restricted in this room as well." "That's completely..." "Well, the hermit was in good spirits... with Mrs. Hammond's zealous efforts at matchmaking, most recently with master of the house, Mr. Gorell Barnes." "I've seen her, and she doesn't listen to me, and I have to do what she says, and she... just... grabs on my arm, and we're off parading around." "And she's like, "Oh, my God, that's him."" "You know, "Stand up straight, look at him," you know." ""He might fancy you, and that would be great and..."" "And everybody keeps saying to me," ""Get on with her, just get on with her,"" "and I am... trying, but she doesn't listen to me." "She doesn't pay any attention to my feelings and how I'm feeling." "It's just push." "And one and two, vomit, one and two, vomit, one and..." "Mr. Everett is on the verge of a Regency cleansing." "One and two, bring it up!" "Aye, look alive." "Come along, guys, bring it up!" "Miss Braund confides in the countess how much she resents" "Mrs. Hammond interfering in her life." "Oh, my God, I haven't told you, I hid in your room." "Did you?" "Me and Victoria were going down the corridor, and I heard her and I went, "Oh!" and I panicked." "And the nearest room was yours, and jumped inside, and me and Victoria..." "You're welcome to hide in my room any time." "Mrs. Hammond went by, and me and Victoria were in the room..." "And we're both standing there going..." ""Do you believe what we're doing?" "We've just hid from Mrs. Hammond."" "Later that day, the conflict comes to a head." ""Go to bed, go to bed now, go to bed now."" "And Lisa... and Lisa just went, "No, I'm not going to bed" "And Mrs. Rogers just turned round and belted her." "What could I have possibly, possibly have done to provoke that?" "Tensions between Miss Braund and Mrs. Hammond have erupted into a violent row." "It was like full-on screaming from the first floor and so we kind of rushed out to the chapel area and... trying to hear what was going on... that it was Mrs. Hammond and Miss Braund after a while," "and they were really laying into each other, you know, saying, "I can't live with this!"" "She just kept grabbing and grabbing me, and the other girls all interceded." "They were telling her to back off." "I'm not having it!" "I'm not having it." "Then the hostess, Mrs. Rogers, tried to take control with disastrous results." "And Mrs. Rogers came out and wanted to know what all the yelling was about and told everyone to shut up and go to bed, and I said, "No, not until we get sorted."" "Mrs. Rogers just turned round and went..." "You could suddenly hear Gorell Barnes' voice from downstairs going," ""All of you now in the terrace room!" "I want to talk to all of you, now!"" "The footmen tell me there's something going on, so I came..." "Mr. Gorell Barnes does what no Regency man would do and intervenes in the women's argument." "I won't be told..." "Mrs. Hammond, if you'll come and sit down." "I will when the cameras have gone." "Can you close the doors, please?" "I've just had enough of all of this." "I cannot carry on with a charge who behaves the way that my charge does." "Captain Glover takes advantage of the breakdown in protocol to show where his feelings lie." "Miss Braund moves out of the bedroom she shares with her chaperone." "The house party is in crisis." "The morning after the row... and the countess and Miss Hopkins work out their frustrations by shooting pistols." "It shows their assets to advantage." "But it's a treat only higher- ranking women are allowed... strictly off limits to the others." "It just looked really wicked, and it sounded really amazing, like the pistol's kind of cracking, and I think all the blokes were well impressed... you know, like, girls in these beautiful dresses kind of firing a gun looked really stylish." "I have to say I was a bit gutted when I saw Victoria and Erishca going off to do their pistol shooting and I was sent upstairs with my sewing." "I did feel a bit sorry for myself." "That was a bit like, "Huh," felt my place in the hierarchy." "The poorer girls, Miss Conick and Miss Martin, are preparing for the summer ball." "I'm so bad at sewing." "Come in." "Your packages have arrived from London." "Excellent." "Unable to afford new ball gowns, they have sent away for trimmings to embellish their old frocks." "Oh, they're so pretty." "The latest Parisian fashion plates provide inspiration." "Rich girls could spend a yearly wage of a lady's maid on a single dress." "These ones." "Perhaps that will come back..." "I've got a big enough bust anyway, the extra fuss up there is a very bad idea." "The other thing I quite like..." "For Miss Braund and the host, Mr. Gorell Barnes, there are more important matters than dressmaking." "Um, okay." "Obviously, you're not happy about what happened last night." "If I'd broken every single rule in the house and I was shagging someone round the back," "I still do not deserve to be spoken to in a such a venomous way and then have someone grabbing me and physically trying to attack me with two girls pulling her off." "But, um... um..." "I can't be chaperoned by someone who doesn't obviously like me, respect me and, you know, obviously..." "and it just..." "Do you think there's any way that you two can resolve this?" "I..." "I need an apology." "Okay." "I'd like an apology." "Actually, I think I'd like a written apology." "Okay, so do you want me to..." "And I've told Mrs. Hammond it's genuinely because" "I really do like somebody in here." "Well, she said she's got these plans, but they're all really big, big plans." "You know, she wants me, if possible, to end up with you." "You know, that's kind of her dream..." "Scenario." "because then that would be her... she would have made that happen." "Madam." "Next in, Mrs. Rogers." "As hostess, she should be dealing with the row, but she is herself part of the problem." "This situation the other night was just..." "Horrendous, and I wish to God I hadn't been woken up." "Then I wouldn't have been involved." "No, absolutely..." "That's what annoys me." "I was woken up when, I don't know how many of those girls were shrieking like children on the landing." "I do not think it is polite to behave in such a way." "I reacted by smacking her, because she was behaving like a child." "The reason that the young..." "I don't think that's an acceptable way of dealing with things." "I agree, and if you remember," "I immediately apologized, I was so shocked." "Of which Miss Braund has said..." "I apologized to her in public." "I don't think there's a problem between yourself and Miss Braund, and I'm very happy that that's been resolved as it is." "However, I think that we need to try and address why all these issues are happening and how they're going to be dealt with." "It may just be a clash of personalities." "I think there is a big clash of personalities." "Mr. Gorell Barnes steels himself for yet another difficult conversation... this time with Mrs. Hammond." "a different kettle of fish, though, isn't she?" "I get on extremely well with her, and I respect her." "You know, it's a bit like Mrs. Rogers." "There is that sort of age thing, and there's one thing about..." "being respective, about effectively giving an older woman a bollocking... which is quite strange." "She's not going to like this." "I don't know if you could bite the bullet and just shock her." "and just, you know, say, "Look, I'm really sorry" ""about what happened the other night." "Can we start a clean slate and get on with it?"" "And so what do I... what am I doing there, G.B.?" "I'm lying myself prostrate at the foot of her, and someone else, again, has apologized to her." "No, but you're effectively..." "Well, you know, you can bring her in, and I can say yet again I'm sorry." "If that's what you want," "I'll do that, but believe me..." "You're not." "It won't stop here!" "I'm nervous because this is my only dress" "I can't see I'm going to make it look any better." "I'm probably going to just ruin it completely." "I put my arms here, and you were then shaking and saying "Get off me!"" "All I was trying to do..." "That is a gesture to calm down." "and you can ask any of the other girls..." "You were shrieking." "Can we... can we..." "Please..." "I don't really, this..." "I don't want this to explode again, and I think..." "That's fine, I don't want it to..." "Honestly, I think that some apologies are needed, and I think that that would..." "I'd like that to happen first of all." "And then..." "I actually, um... as I said to you earlier... would actually like, um, yes, an apology, and I would actually like a written apology." "You want an apology, and a written apology?" "So I will give you an apology, and I will give you a written apology, then what will you want?" "That's fine, that's what I want." "Okay, and then if..." "But I'd like it to be sincere." "Yeah, I know, but I think..." "Oh, so now you want a written apology and a sincere written and verbal apology." "And then what will you want?" "Otherwise what is the point?" "She'll go on with wanting what she wants all the time." "Look, we may well..." "We've got to bite the bullet." "We got to get on with it." "And I think that you should apologize to her and I think that you should apologize to her sincerely." "And that's it; end of conversation, okay?" "Yes." "Mr. Gorell Barnes is off to visit his hermit." "it's the hermit's duty to offer spiritual support." "Did you hear about the saga the other night?" "I did, yeah... it was an episode, a slapping and shaking episode... under your roof, Master." "It's not good enough, is it?" "How can you let that nonsense go on?" "and said, "What the is going on?" "All of you down here now!"" "And they went..." "So then I gave them a good hiding." "But everyone got upset and then the hostess decided that the best way to sort it was to come and give Miss Braund..." "A bit of a kicking, and she gave her a slap." "So anyway, then I gave her a bollocking." "Mrs. Rogers?" "I bet she liked that." "Gave her a rogering." "Crazy." "Scratch-the-surface nutters." "Absolutely mad." "and Captain Glover has arranged to be woken." "He's concerned about Miss Braund and is planning a surprise." "As a naval captain, he would be a good match, as he has the potential to earn a great deal of money." "Has everyone retired?" "Yes, sir." "I noticed that Miss Braund was very upset." "She'd taken herself off and she was crying;" "and a footman brought her a hankie." "And of all the girls to date, she... she's come across as..." "to me, anyway... as the most sort of caring, and thinking of other people and going beyond herself." "And..." "I just thought she'd had an awful day." "She was very down, and... and I sent her a note to that effect, but I wanted to make a bigger statement and have a nice surprise for her when she woke up:" "It's a new day and be happy and be positive." "Are you spelling the word "Lisa" by any chance?" "No, just "B."" ""B" for Braund?" "Yes." "Okay, good." "I don't know how the human species exactly works, but I think getting four people for three months and pairing them off like this is a very small mate-selection way of doing it." "It's just, uh, it's the kind of thing I'm thinking at the moment about this very strange Regency time." "an Irishman in the middle of the night with a bale of hay spelling out a letter B." "I think he should have made the B smaller and maybe got the whole name in." "I won't suggest it to him, though." "No, I will." "Paddy..." "I was a bit unhappy yesterday, so..." "Um, this is really, really sweet." "Look, it's really lovely." "It just made me laugh." "It's quite a nice thing to get up to." "It's Captain Glover." "It has to be." "At one time Miss Braund liked Mr. Everett, but are her feelings beginning to be swayed towards Captain Glover?" "It's beautiful!" "It's beautiful potpourri." "Oh, it's stunning." "The gesture Captain Glover made with the "B happy"" "was just staggering, and I don't think she's ever had anybody do anything like that for her." "And I could see how she would be maybe swayed towards him." "If that happened to me, I could be persuaded." "Only one man has shown any interest." "That's not true." "Which one's that one?" "What do you mean, which one's that?" "This enormous gesture of "friendship"... uh, does it sway your feelings for Captain Glover in any way?" "Um..." "I find him very charming." "Amorous tensions mount as the house is decorated for the summer ball." "Mr. Everett hopes to improve his romantic chances by perfecting a vital Regency skill." "He's invited a piano teacher to help him." "I'm having a singing lesson today because a few weeks ago, we were having a jolly good party, and I decided it would be quite amusing if I flicked a few stones up at Miss Hopkins' window" "in an attempt to serenade her." "And, uh, it didn't really work because I couldn't think of anything to sing, which is a bit hopeless and it was terribly unromantic, but it was funny at the time." "So then I thought that it'd be quite nice to do something properly for her." "So now I'm having a singing lesson here to see if I can get my voice in trim so I can give her a nice song, and hopefully she'll like that." "I do think he's a great guy... but I don't know if he's strong enough for me... not "strong enough," but he..." "I don't think he would put me in my place." "I need somebody to put me in my place and I don't think he'd be able to do that." "I'll try and see if I can grab Miss Hopkins for the first dance;" "I'll see, I think." "Or maybe I'll save her for a later dance." "I don't know yet." "This is a world where display is all." "The masters of male display were the dandies... men who devoted their lives to perfecting style." "Writer and fashion guru Nicholas Foulkes is going to reveal the secrets of the Regency's most famous dandy..." "Beau Brummell." "For the dandy, appearance is everything." "It's a refinement of appearance." "You gentlemen, by the look of it, are all bucks;" "it's all about bucks and bloods, it's chase, boxing maybe, the martial arts." "For the dandy, really it's about perfection of form." "This was such a barbaric time;" "I mean, you had not only the Peninsula and then the Waterloo campaigns, but you also had this lawless society." "So Brummell was trying to impose a certain order on it or rather dressing in a way that was incredibly understated." "You've got these different strands going on here... because the Byronic thing is very romantic and the whole dandyism was the suppression of all emotion." "So he would always appear, this amazingly chilly character who would just sort of survey a scene and... and just kill it with one comment, or just a flex of an eyebrow or a, you know, a curl of the lip." "Whereas Byron would come in and there'd be..." "I mean, descriptions of what Byron was wearing were amazing." "I mean, the man must have dressed like he was color blind." "His whole demeanor was calculated to outrage, whereas Brummell's was calculated to astonish... purely because of the sort of iciness of the demeanor and the, um... total control." "At 3:00, while the men attend to the theory, the women have already started to prepare for the evening." "Amongst the ladies that trim their dresses, it's a much bigger event." "So, Miss Conick and I really..." "I think we're quite excited about it because we spent literally two days working on dresses and sort of looking..." "thinking about it." "It's really one of the first times that men are really allowed to be with a single girl and that's when they have an opportunity to chat..." "So that's probably why we're suddenly getting excited, because we can chat to them and we can be silly and it'll be fun, and it's all allowed." "The last few nights have been so sort of fractured, to get everyone together doing something." "People would queue to watch Brummell dress." "We only get one go at this." "Following his example, the gentlemen take extra care preparing for the dance." "Excellent." "Muscular legs were sexy." "Captain Glover is given a fashionable accessory." "It's just to make your calves look bigger, sir." "These pathetic little things here?" "Yes, sir." "Just take that off." "Do they have these sort of things for any other part of the body?" "I do believe there is another padding that some of the gentlemen will be using." "Somewhere else on the anatomy?" "Okay, so I'm small of calf muscle and they're small of..." "That's right, sir." "Mmm, interesting." "I think I would have preferred some kind of cod piece to these leggings, because this is going to... this is..." "I'm really hot already." "The idea is that you would bunch the shirt so the groin would look bigger" "So you wouldn't have... to attract the ladies." "Hello..." "ladies." "Egad, sir." "Wish me luck." "I'm going to kill some ladies here." "I feel a bit like a princess tonight with these fantastic clothes on and amazing jewelry..." "I'm definitely in touch with my feminine side." "I think we'll try and keep tonight light and fun" "But the harmony of the evening will depend on" "Miss Braund and her chaperone, Mrs. Hammond." "I think Miss Braund was entitled to an apology, uh, which I was happy to make." "I painted her a watercolor and invited her to come home, uh, so that we can, uh, repair our friendship." "As the ball commences, protocol is rigidly observed." "To ensure that the men are shared, no woman can claim the same partner for more than three dances." "Oh, my God, it's stunning!" "So what was added to your dresses?" "Nothing; mine's new." "You got a brand- new dress?" "Thanks for noticing." "Sorry." "I was talking to her about the added thing." "Absolutely." "It's called the wonder calf." "Really?" "Yes." ""Hello, girls."" "I mean, the rest of me is natural, I can assure you." "Rest of what?" "Your hair." "His hair, it's natural." "And his teeth." "My bulges." "I'm going to get you, Hopkins." "To dance well was essential to make your way in society." "A person's reputation depended on it." "For Mr. Everett, the evening is going according to plan." "Down the middle." "It's been a bit of a tension release after the last few days I think." "We needed something fun something nice and something very Regency and something really romantic, and it is really romantic." "It's really a fairy tale kind of evening." "it's the only kind of physical contact we've had." "Totally; it's quite weird." "Yeah, holding hands with a man." "Ooh!" "Change." "Very good." "In this world where men and women cannot touch, the ritual of the dance is highly charged." "Up, up, up, up..." "As partners passed, they could whisper intimacies." "Two, three, four, back." "Miss Braund and Mrs. Hammond find a moment to talk." "So, Lisa, are you going to come home now?" "I think they're working out a way for having some other access to that room." "They've done really well with it, haven't they?" "It's beautiful." "Thank you." "Stunning, beautiful." "But thank you." "Thank you." "As the young ladies and gentlemen concentrate on the rules of the dance and on each other, it seems that harmony has been restored to the Regency House." "As for romance, will Mr. Everett finally persuade Miss Hopkins of his true feelings?" "In the cellars of the house," "Mr. Gorell Barnes makes a discovery... an abandoned hellfire club." "Bad-boy poet Lord Byron revived the hellfire tradition in the Regency." "Ah, poems that need to be read to the ladies." "Mr. Gorell Barnes plans to open the club for a boys' night of forbidden pleasures." "It will be strictly out of bounds to the ladies." "The ladies have something to look forward to, as well... handsome Mr. James Carrington is arriving for the weekend." "The young ladies are eager to meet him, and wonder how the men will react to the new competition." "I think I've found my talent." "Because there's going to be a number of gentlemen in the house this weekend, there's just a few heckles going up and a few comments about, you know," ""It's hard enough in here as it is." "We don't need any more competition."" "So... so, yeah, it should be interesting." "Musician Mr. Carrington might look like a great catch, but without a penny to his name, he spells trouble for the ladies." "He has joined the houseguests for a sumptuous banquet in honor of Lord Byron." "It's my fault you got the sheep's head." "Stepping into Byron's shoes for tonight is millennium poet Simon Armitage." "Byron was famously mad, bad and dangerous to know, but he was still invited to all the best places." "And what is the woman's lot in the early 19th century?" "It's not a great one." "It's very restrictive." "It will say, "The girls may embroider this afternoon." ""The kitchen will be in the boudoir for the girls to play with."" "And you'd be like, "Cool."" "The ladies are thrilled to have two attractive men" "But Gorell Barnes has other plans for his new guests." "All the men will stay with us tonight, yeah." "The dandy is asked to distract the ladies." "You will entertain the ladies." "Did you... did you know that?" "No, I didn't know that." "How do I entertain them again?" "I made them laugh once very, very, very slightly." "But basically you'll entertain the ladies." "Then I join you downstairs for the exotic dancing." "without them knowing where you're going." "We gather as the Kentchurch Society of the Dilettante." "We come to honor the great Lord Byron." "Gentlemen, welcome to the Hellfire Club." "To Lord Byron." "Byron made poetry wild and exciting, linking it with passion, darkness, the exotic, the forbidden." ""Sob for me, slob for me, break out the grog for me," ""jibe for me, tack for me, take up the slack for me," ""slurp for me, burp for me, load up a crate for me," ""turpentine is great for me, work up a thirst for me," "Basically being a man in the 19th century was a whole lot more fun than being a woman." "The ladies, you know, outside of this, they're all, like, you know, amazing." "They've all, like, either been to Cambridge or they've... they run their own business or they're successful in their own right, you know." "And certainly here they're just, you know, pushed into this box and they have to behave like this, and they can't do that, and they can't..." "There's lots of "can't" s going on for them." "I'm feeling very annoyed." "I don't mind..." "The secret is out." "The women know about the party." "I am livid with him." "I think it's so rude." "Are you okay?" "Yeah, I'm just cross." "And I don't blame you." "That's very rude of you not to even be told." "Dress up as the blokes and go, because it's a gentlemen's-only club." "So why don't we do that?" "The dance of the maenads..." "followers of the god, Dionysus... celebrates the release of inhibitions" ""Work up a thirst for me, put yourself first for me, climb on your cross for me all the way over the sea."" "Have we got stockings?" "We've got stockings on, darling." "We need a button on this one." "Someone should notice it's got a button missing." "Girls, the dress is going to have to come off." "That's what I'm saying, so undo my dress." "No wonder they need valets to dress them in the morning." "Actually, these smell." "Okay." "Ow!" "He's shorter than you." "Wicked." "Amazing." "Oh, the men's clothes are so much better than ours." "We have conformed to all the rules and the regulations they've laid down to us." "We've been good, little girls, we've gone to bed at 11:00, we've not been drinking the alcohol." "Time for us to have some fun." "There's a level of fun not acceptable." "I'm just telling you you cannot go into that club." "We know that, and we're not intending to." "The dandy is going to..." "I trust that dandy about as much as I trust a three-legged racehorse." "The dandy, if he's obliging, is going to invite the gentlemen out to join him in a cigar." "If any one of you set foot in that club, you will compromise us old bags." "We're trusting you girls not to cross that line." "I do think that the duennas ought to come, though, as a rearguard." "I'd like the chaperones to come." "I'm not going to miss this for the world." "But if any of you get pregnant, you'll have me to deal with!" "That includes you, Dandy!" "Bring a decanter with you." "Um, Everett, I need your help!" "Some blokes kicking off." "And you, Glover." "Quick, Foxy, come on." "Some blokes fighting out here." "Brilliantly done." "They are lads." "And who was responsible for this?" "It was a joint effort, sir." "A joint effort, sir." "Come on, Miss Hopkins." ""Captain Hopkins" to you." "Mr. Everett decides it's time to woo Miss Hopkins." "Hopkins!" "Hopkins." "Oh, bollocks!" "What do you want?" ""Oh, but soft!" ""What light through yonder window breaks?" ""'Tis the east and Juliet, and Victoria is the sun."" "That is, yes." "So what do you think of the girls, then?" "Gorgeous." "Were they lovely?" "Far more..." "Far more beautiful..." "Than you." "Yeah, I got that impression." "Well, you looked ridiculous." "I looked ridiculous?" "Kind of sexy, too." "Yeah, but I need to think of a song." "I did this twice now." "I can't remember it." "Clarr..." "Clarr.." "Clarr..." "?" "Sleep... ?" "?" "Sleep tonight... ?" "Unlike Mr. Everett, Mr. Carrington is a professional singer, and sober." "Mm-hmm, that's what I say." "?" "If the thundercloud... ?" "?" "Passes rain... ?" "?" "So let it rain... ?" "?" "Rain down on here. ?" "The morning after, an inquest is held into the previous night's excesses." "Your charges have been very respectful, I thought." "the cross-dressing thing, then they sort of..." "They settled down, yes." "They settled down for an early night, which I thought was rather demure." "A night to be remembered, though, sir." "Oh, yeah, yeah, it was." "Yeah, another one." "I fell asleep on the billiard table... and then I fell asleep underneath the billiard table." "Despite Mr. Everett's attempts it is the departing Mr. Carrington" "I can see Carrington being a really good mate." "You know, one of those guys..." "I really think he's lovely." "He's got everybody summed up in here in one day... everybody to a "T."" "He's a very switched-on guy." "Hmm." "Very, very switched-on guy." "And I hope he..." "I do hope he comes back because I think he brings a really good dynamic to the group." "Oh, I think he's fantastic." "Shall we run for it?" "Keep going!" "After Everett had abused me," "Carrington sang me this really, really beautiful tune, and everybody... everybody just went just deadly silent and I sat there going, "Oh."" "Oh, my God, I think he likes you." "I do, seriously." "I don't think he does." "No, I don't think he does, no." "Oh, chaperone at 12:00." "Next time, there's trouble in paradise." "A beautiful stranger arrives." "I am a bit flirtatious, but, hey, rules are made to be broken." "A handsome rival returns." "And I think Mr. Carrington will break my heart." "There are fisticuffs galore, and finally the gloves come off." "The thing with very good girls is that when they're bad..." "They're very bad." "They're very bad." "It's a deliciously naughty time at the Regency House Party." "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "What can you expect?" "Bottoms up." "A storm is brewing as a wealthy heiress joins the party..." "I am a bit flirtatious, but, hey, rules are made to be broken." "A handsome rival returns..." "I think Mr. Carrington will break my heart." "The men conduct a secret fight..." "This is highly illegal." "And one lady... breaks all the rules." "Breast, anyone?" "At the Regency House Party." "I'm watching." "Captioning sponsored by WNET/THIRTEEN NEW YORK" "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "This week in the Regency House, the gentlemen are sneaking off for a secret meeting in the woods." "They've got an appointment with their personal trainer," "Professor Radford, and local boxing champion Tim Dean, otherwise known as the Kentchurch Bruiser." "And then suddenly..." "Right." "Have you clapped yet?" "Notice the power of the blow..." "Professor Radford is an expert in Regency sport and has a proposition for the gentlemen that they cannot disclose to the other guests." "Jesus, Mr. Dean..." "This is man's territory, and we're going to talk about the "fancy."" "The fancy are the center of sporting excitement, sporting risk and daring." "If we are able to get, um, two distinguished fighters..." "We have two fighters." "I know of another fighter who might be willing to take on our own..." "local champion." "The prizefight, with its celebration of blood and violence, had fascinated men of all classes throughout the 18th century." "But women didn't like it and nor, increasingly, did the law." "were to come with their law enforcement officers and take you into custody, the ladies would not be pleased." "So... the ladies do not know... but nobody knows... they're essentially illegal." "One... two..." "For the ladies in the house, life is one long round of trimming bonnets and dance lessons." "Although they've come to find a husband," "Regency routine deprives them of the gentlemen's company for most of the day." "This is making it hard for the chaperones to matchmake." "Well, you said you thought the countess and Mr. Gorell Barnes were a foregone conclusion." "The whole point of a Regency house party of this sort, then, was to get a husband and the best possible husband you could get." "One, two, three..." "The girls would all be in competition with each other trying to secure the best marriage they possibly can." "The chaperones would be in competition with each other." "The lack of romance means loss of money." "Some chaperones were paid to secure the most advantageous marriage for their charge." "No match meant no fee." "A letter for Mrs. Rogers." "To make matters worse, news has arrived of some serious competition:" "good news for the gentlemen, bad news for the ladies, and disastrous for the chaperones." ""Dearest Mrs. Rogers, I hope you will forgive my boldness," ""but the presence of Miss Tanya Samuel" ""is sure to be a welcome addition to your proceedings." ""Her beauty, confidence and honesty" ""make her invigorating company." "She remains, however, unattached."" "I'm making no plans to be agreeable to this young lady." "With your charge's interest paramount," "I know I'm not going to like her." "I shall make sure I don't like her." "My name's Tanya Samuel, and I am a modern-day girl who lives a modern-day life." "I've got this theory that if you can't wear denim to a job, then it's not worth doing it." ""Rules of behavior for ladies:" ""You must conform to the wishes of your hostess."" "That depends, doesn't it?" "That really depends." "In the modern world," "Miss Samuel runs a successful fashion business." "She has a strong sense of her own worth, especially when it comes to men." "I'm the type of woman that believes that a man, if they want to take you out, they should take you out." "If I go out on a date with anybody and... on that first date I'm expected to pay half the bill, then I would never see that person ever again." ""Her beauty, confidence and honesty make her invigorating company."" "She's been the toast of the capital..." "What does she want to come here for then?" "Miss Samuel's luggage is sent on ahead." "A wealthy heiress and a beauty as well, she enters the house at the top of the pecking order, a prize catch for any of the gentlemen." "The master of the house, Mr. Gorell Barnes, wants his new guest to be warmly received." "I think that we should all try and welcome her" "After all, with her fortune and looks, she could make him the perfect wife." "Sensing their hostility, he's meeting with the chaperones in their inner sanctum." "Where are you going to put her, Mrs. Rogers?" "Um... who could double up?" "The countess has stacks of room." "We can all move in with the countess." "But... well, I've got..." "I've got the biggest room, but you can't all move in with me." "I've got the biggest bed as well." "I presume that she... she would have her own room, being of her wealth and status." "Yeah, that's what I would have said." "What would you think if we made this into a bedroom?" "I mean, I don't know how often you use it." "About as often as you use the billiard room." "It's quite nice to have this room." "Yeah." "One option is just not having her." "It absolutely stinks that somebody walks in and everybody has to shuffle around like... crabs." "There are eight other summer parties going on;" "you'd be honored that she'd chosen ours." "You'd go, "Brilliant, wonderful, let's make every effort we can to ensure that she has a nice time."" "I'll leave it in your capable hands." "Yeah." "Okay?" "Okay." "She's got birds in there." "A bit strange, isn't it?" "No one else brought pets with them." "We could let the cat out." "Right, everyone, um, just to officially announce that Miss Samuel will be joining us, um, to stay for the remainder of our stay." "And there's been some, um, accommodation rearranging." "And what we've... we're in the process of organizing is for Miss Hopkins and Miss Francesca to move into the countess's bedroom and the countess to move into Miss Hopkins' bedroom." "And then Miss Samuel will have Miss Francesca's bedroom." "The biggest loser in the reshuffle is real-life Countess Griaznov." "her title has secured her the grandest room in the house." "Well, I think maybe we should keep our own chamber pot." "I'll carry that then, shall I?" "I mean, I'm not happy, because my room is beautiful, and it's one of the big joys of being here is waking up in it every morning." "Just... it is gorgeous." "Um, but, yeah..." "The new guest is a potential rival for the heart of Mr. Gorell Barnes, a gentleman whom the countess rightly regards as her natural partner." "I get on very well with Mr. Gorell Barnes." "Feel like we're head girl and head boy in a strange sort of way, and Mrs. Rogers is headmistress." "And to cap it all, Miss Samuel's lovebirds have no respect for the countess's rank." "And my new room is just above the new, evil, screechy birds." "I wasn't feeling particularly well disposed to her" "My philosophy on the birds is it's cruel to keep them caged;" "we should just eat them instead..." "on toast." "Of all the chaperones," "Mrs. Enright has the most cause to feel threatened by the new girl." "Her charge, Miss Conick, is at the bottom of the pile." "Now her prospects of marriage seem remoter than ever." "She was a bit upset when she heard that there's another girl arriving." "I said, "Why are you upset?"" ""Well," she said, "I don't quite know why."" ""Why is that?" "I don't know, dear." "I'm honestly just upset for you."" "And I went, "I'm not upset."" "Intelligent, beautiful, and wealthy... right up my street." "The master comes to inspect the room the chaperones have arranged for Miss Samuel." "He is not impressed." "I think it's pretty horrible, and I think it would be unfair if she was put in here, so my suggestion is to change... which I'm going to obviously run by with Mrs. Rogers, but it's to change Mrs. Rogers' boudoir into her bedroom," "and then I think, the countess will go back to her room," "Miss Hopkins will have her room again, and Miss Francesca will be back here." "So, I think... it was a mistake, which will cause a big flare-up again, I'm sure." "People are being difficult about her, I think." "what she's going to let herself in for, does she?" "Once again it's all change." "At the master's insistence, the hostess gives up her bedroom and moves into the boudoir." "I should feel the bed." "Yes, very important... the bounce." "I mean, my other room was quite a lot bigger, but I suppose it's quite odd that I've... the one who's changed, which you wouldn't do in real life, would you?" "You wouldn't give up your own bedroom." "I was going to say "Welcome to the asylum,"" "but maybe I shouldn't;" "maybe that'll frighten her too much." "After days of unrest, sparked by news of her visit," "West Indian heiress Miss Samuel finally arrives at the Regency House." "Oh, they're throwing... rose petals, red rose petals as she walked up the drive." "So I've decided for the next four weeks," "I am going to throw rose petals at her feet wherever she walks, I've decided." "And she is funny." "Well, I'd hardly regard this as good news." "Thank you." "Afternoon." "My first impression of the house... very grand and very..." "very, very strange." "Everything is done for you and you're literally waited on hand and foot, which is something that I could get used to." "And I don't know quite how I'm going to be received by the other guests because I'm very, very privileged, just under the countess." "I have taken upon myself for the next four weeks to go and gather rose petals and throw them at her feet." "My God, how unfair is that?" "That's the kind of romance that's lacking from my life." "She doesn't need deportment lessons, that's for sure." "No, she doesn't; she could teach us a thing or two." "Just hope she has the personality to match." "I think my game's gone off slightly." "It's a great opportunity to really experience living the life of a black heiress." "It's just nice to be able to actually enter into a house of affluence," "and not being a maid or a slave for that matter." "Although much of Britain's wealth came from the slave economy, there were prominent black people in Regency society." "Queen Charlotte herself was rumored to come from black descent." "Because I'm the sort of, if you like, new kid on the block with all this luxury and privilege," "I'm feeling a bit..." "disadvantaged, funnily enough, with all my advantages." "That's kind of a bit daunting, really." "Regency Britain hardly embraced racial equality." "But it had a healthy respect for money, and wealthy plantation owners and their nonwhite children were admitted into society and often considered a great social catch." "This is the countess." "Hello, nice to meet you." "And Miss Braund." "Nice to meet you." "Then we've got Mr. Foxsmith." "Hello, nice to meet you." "Mr. Everett." "Hi." "And Captain Glover... naval captain, so that's quite smart, much smarter than an army captain." "I'm distressed at your immediate lack of concern for your interest in my charge." "My immediate lack of interest..." "You're instantly attracted, I saw." "I don't know, would you like a drink or cup of tea or something?" "Provincial life in Regency England could be dull, predictable and very isolating." "Any new guest of rank was inevitably the source of much speculation and excitement." "The gentlemen are going to leave you to get to know each other, so, um, hope you feel welcome." "And do you like your bedroom?" "It's gorgeous, thanks." "Good." "Lovely." "Okay, see you later." "As the guests proceed to dinner, there's a new order of precedence." "The host takes Miss Samuel on his arm in place of the countess." "In front of our host, we have a turtle soup, and in front of our hostess we have a callaloo soup, which is pork, crabmeat and spicy vegetables." "This is our Caribbean-dinner evening in, uh, Miss Samuel's honor to welcome her to Kentchurch." "We will be eating sort of sweet Caribbean foods." "Dinner during the Regency was served à la française." "Rather than a series of courses, sweet and savory dishes were laid out on the table and eaten together." "Emphasis was placed on the decorative, by the Prince Regent's French chef, Antoine Carême, large and elaborate sugar sculptures adorn the table as centerpieces." "It's a very controversial scene." "It's a... a slave plantation, yes." "The sugar?" "Yes, sugar... that employed slaves" "Although the trade in slaves was abolished in 1807, many of Britain's great country estates were built up on the income from slave-produced sugar, including this one." "Now with an abolitionist in the house, the guests must confront the truth behind their lavish lifestyle." "You know, once the slaves were captured, the, uh, masters used to try to dehumanize the... the slaves in order to ensure that they became subservient." "So they'd be stripped of their names." "They'd be..." "Sometimes the males would be killed" "Sometimes the babies were thrown overboard and lots of horrific things." "I just can't feel guilt or shame or anything for something that I'd never done and ever wanted to do." "I can't be guilty for our history." "Of course slavery was wrong, but who discusses it as much as we English," "Who said it was rude to talk politics at the table?" "It is rude." "Did you enjoy the sugar?" "You prefer honey, though." "Um, I do prefer honey, absolutely, as Mr. Gorell Barnes knows." "How much do you have there?" "Fifty." "Okay, so if I give you, um..." "Early the next morning, preparations for the bareknuckle prizefight get under way." "I'm sure you understand the motivation..." "Captain Glover has put up the purse money for the Kentchurch Bruiser." "I'm going to put you through your paces this morning." "You're fighting tomorrow, so I take it that what we do today shouldn't be too strenuous." "There's been a challenge from another part of the land laid down, so it's a matter of pride and honor." "You know, you want your local guy to win, so we're investing time and money in his training to make sure he's in peak condition to ensure victory." "Stand still." "Since the beginning," "Tim Dean has been a gentlemen's personal trainer." "He has subjected them to a punishing regime." "Now Captain Glover is funding the Kentchurch Bruiser, he's turning the tables on his instructor." "I want you to run across there, pick up a shovelful of horse manure and deposit it here." "Knees up, knees up." "Stand in front of you." "Deposit." "Good." "Knees up, knees up, knees up." "Excellent, excellent." "30 stones, 30 yards, in the barrel as quickly as you can." "Go!" "This is good for your wind, Mr. Dean." "How are you feeling, Mr. Dean?" "Is that what I think it is, sir?" "One aspect of their training is particularly grueling." "What are you trying to do, make us sick or something?" "Purging the body with an emetic to induce vomiting." "Now Tim Dean gets a taste of his own medicine." "How do you feel?" "Do you mind if we stand back?" "And maybe tell you what was in the drink." "Just orange juice." "Do you think I'd make you feel sick before a match?" "Breakfast." "The issue of sugar crops up again." "During the Regency, the campaign to abolish slavery gave rise to a new form of political pressure." "The public was urged to boycott plantation products until slaves were free." "There's an address to the people about... suggestion of boycotting sugar and tobacco." ""The family that uses five pounds of sugar per week" ""will be abstaining from the consumption 21 months" ""to prevent the slavery or murder of one fellow creature."" "Perhaps we'll do it for 24 hours... sugar." "24 hours?" "Make it a..." "Okay, well, I'm willing to make that token." "I think we'd all very well do without four puddings a day, except Mrs. Rogers, who likes them." "We'll all abstain from sugar for 24 hours." "I was going to say that." "I think that if we are supposed to be a fashionable house, well, I don't think it's actually going to kill anybody to... to..." "to make a gesture." "It doesn't bother me, because I like neither sugar nor tobacco." "People have to decide for themselves." "That's what I'd like done in this house." "I would like people to abstain from sugar and tobacco." "I think it should be to people's discretion and most people will do it, given a choice." "I'm going to say that there will be no sugar." "Was there anyone who didn't want to do it?" "It wasn't an issue of they didn't want to do it." "It was more they thought they should have a personal choice." "So Miss Hammond, I think, had a problem with the fact that somebody made a decision for her." "But then, you're in a household, so you would be kicked out if you didn't do it." "As much as it is a really good debate, there was something far more important." "Let me read on, okay." ""News has reached the capital" ""that Mr. Austin Howard" ""is said to be back in England after a stint in Europe."" "Yeah, basically there's a really fit bloke" ""His reputation precedes him." ""He's been in and out of the scandal sheets."" ""His attention to style has been noted."" "Something of a dandy." "In the Regency House, the ladies are all aflutter." "Musician and dandy Mr. Austin Howard has arrived." "Well, well." "Famed for their wit, dandies were invited to house parties to charm and amuse the ladies." "How wonderful a greeting." "Regency pinups, they were feted like pop stars." "Such gaiety." "Everyone's very excited about your arrival." "Without money or status, there were few opportunities for black people to enter society." "Musical talent offered a rare way in." "There's a definite lack of musical talent in the house." "Is there indeed?" "Do you play the piano?" "Uh, no, but I'm going to have..." "My quartet will be arriving shortly." "Well, I'd like to introduce you to everybody." "So, what did you think of Mr. Austin Howard, then?" "Um..." "Marks out of ten?" "An 11." "Really?" "G.B.'s only an eight." "I was going to say 12, actually." "Twelve?" "There you go." "Miss Victoria, 12." "Twelve?" "A 12!" "Well, I would like the opportunity to get to know him better, but at the moment he's an 8½." "Hi." "The arrival of an attractive gentleman is a sharp reminder the main objective of a house party..." "bagging a husband." "How are you?" "That was some welcome you got." "Kind of romance issue is not being addressed." "We don't really have that much opportunity" "Firstly, I think we... kind of girls came in here and said," ""You know, if it doesn't happen naturally," "And the chaperones are saying, "How on earth can we control," ""you know, kind of strong, independent, successful women?" "They're not going do as we tell them to do."" "Then we'll have a jolly good time." "We are going to have a very good time, actually." "We're having a good time;" "we'll have an even better time now." "The chaperones should really be encouraged to do a lot more chaperoning and a lot more orchestrating meetings with their charges and... and the gentlemen." "Do you..." "Can I just ask, do you mean... do you mean orchestrating chaperoned time or orchestrating unchaperoned time?" "Well, I think..." "I think what should happen is that we can go out with the chaperone..." "with the man... and the chaperone could, um... yeah, exactly, like, "sprain the ankle."" "It's from the ladies." "Oh, yes?" ""The dandy will be entertaining the chaperones from 3:00 p.m.," ""therefore leaving the ladies unsupervised." ""Fancy meeting up for a few cheeky lemonades?" ""Please reply ASAP to Miss Hopkins" ""should you choose to accept our invitation." "Fondest regards, the girls."" "Hmm." "Before they can rendezvous with the ladies, the gentlemen are off on manly business." "They're inspecting a secret location for the fight." "Walk on." "Why is it such a secret event?" "It's something that the gentlemen get up to" "It wasn't considered a very gentlemanly thing to do" "Um, so they had to go in secret and dress down..." "If you borrow some of Foxsmith's clothes..." "Foxsmith might lend you some clothes." "The professor was telling us that sometimes up to 20,000 people will turn up at these sort events." "It's word of mouth, because it's highly illegal." "Bareknuckle boxing is against the law... not because of its brutality, but because after the French Revolution, the authorities feared the mob." "It's almost like a 21st-century illegal rave, where all these people come and gather and they have a fight and they gamble and they drink and they do everything, but no one knows the location till the last minute." "To foil local magistrates, fights were staged on county boundaries." "If they intervened, the event simply continued across the border and out of their jurisdiction." "This is a far too ruffian event for the ladies to even consider or think about it." "It's much better it's kept out of their delicate eyes." "As the ladies set out to meet the gentlemen," "Mr. Howard has been asked to distract the chaperones." ""The charmed ocean's pausing..."" ""and the waves lie still and gleaming," ""and the lulled winds seem dreaming... whose breasts are gently heaving..."" "Isn't that charming?" "How nice it was to meet Mr. Howard, who appears to be a charming, urbane, sophisticated and talented young man with marvelous manners." ""With a full but soft emotion."" "He's black... there's no other way of saying that... very handsomely black and with very, very charming manners, um, and a most alluring personality." "Are we being stood up here?" "If we have been stood up" "I will not be happy." "Ah-ha-ha, here we go." "Afternoon." "Afternoon, sirs." "Are we well?" "We are very well." "What do you think of Mr. Howard?" "All right." "A bit freaked by our welcoming committee." "I thought it was quite funny." "We were thinking that we would at one point organize... and this is where you come in, G.B.... organize, like, a dinner for the chaperones, like, somewhere really far away." "Like London?" "That's about four days away." "Can we send them shopping for the day?" "Miss Samuel's initiative to encourage romance is going to plan, but unchaperoned, Regency decorum is soon abandoned." "We should all, like, squash the arms of the men" "I mean, something that you're not allowed to do." "Oh, my God, we've actually touched hands." "I like that you've taken off your jackets." "Miss Samuel had this idea:" ""We're going to go up" ""for an unchaperoned picnic with the boys." ""Don't tell the chaperones." "We're going to have gin and lemonade."" "And I was, like, "That's nice, but it's not really bad, is it?"" "I've got to do something much more extreme." "We've got to kind of lead this to another level of badness, because if the worst thing you can do is go without your bonnet or something, you know, that's not really kind of going for it." "During the Regency, black musicians performed throughout Europe's concert halls and opera houses." "Mr. Howard's quartet is performing a Beethoven sonata." "Dawn." "Today, the gentlemen of the house will host the fancy, a sporting fraternity drawn to a remote corner of the Kentchurch estate by the promise of a prizefight." "Good morning, Professor." "Good morning, gentlemen, good morning." "Good to see you again." "Good to see you indeed." "The big day has now arrived." "In the Kentchurch Bruiser's camp," "Captain Glover is leaving nothing to chance." "What's the good diet for this morning before the fight?" "With blows to the stomach and the solar plexus, the stomach might rebel, so I think a light breakfast." "There are bets within the bets that might be, within a round, who goes down first." "And who draws first blood... who might lose a tooth." "The cook put some special formula into that breakfast, so there's no way you're going to be able to lose." "It's magic stuff." "Squeeze." "No, don't." "Can you crush an egg?" "I definitely have the advantage on the looks front," "Oh, my God, it must be terrible." "For the time being, so..." "The master has come to meet the fighter he's backing," "Matt "Killer" Skelton." "It's almost like that, but they're all... they're like that for the simple fact that obviously you..." "you can grab as well, whereas in modern-day boxing, there's no holding." "In the modern world, the Killer is the heavyweight champion of all England... a title that dates back to Regency times." "How's the... how's the fights been recently?" "I've had seven bouts and seven wins, seven by K.O." "They used to call me the, um..." "the Grizzly Bear." "How much do you weigh?" "At the minute, I'm 18 stone." "And do you know how much Dean weighs?" "I think he's slightly under." "I think fitness, really, is on my side." "So, for the sake of our wagers, when do you think you're going to..." "get him?" "Hopefully, I would have exhausted him" "Why not just go for the kill in the beginning, just knock him out, first round?" "The fancy embraced sporting enthusiasts from all classes of society." "The Regent himself was a devotee, but so were servants and even highwaymen." "Fantastic." "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "The Regency was an age of gambling mania." "Gentlemen risked vast fortunes and dismissed their losses with an attitude bordering on the cavalier." "Five... five..." "I'll take the first blood." "That's it, I'm closing this book." "Gentlemen of the fancy, the first fighter to make his appearance..." "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Will be your local hero and champion..." "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "The Kentchurch Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "And now, gentlemen, the challenger will arrive from across a boundary." "Give him a Kentchurch welcome, gentlemen." "Like music, boxing was another area of Regency life in which black men flourished, and some of the most famous fighters of the age... former slaves... became household names." "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "The favorite tonight, despite what you all think about your local lad, is the Killer..." "Matthew "Killer" Skelton from Virginia in the United States." "Now, many of us... many of us still regard it as "the colonies."" "They will come back into the empire." "It's only a matter of time before they realize the error of their ways." "Jeez!" "Oh, Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Fighters... set to." "Regency boxing predated today's Queensberry rules." "Come on, Mr. Dean!" "Come on, Bruiser!" "It combined punching with wrestling and was always bareknuckle." "Who wants to back the favorite?" "Who's going to show first blood?" "First blood!" "First blood!" "Time!" "Rounds continued until one man hit the ground." "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Here they come." "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Round 16." "Come on!" "Come on!" "Fights could last for hours and only ended when one of the pugilists was unable to walk up to the chalk square, hence the expression "squaring up."" ""The Kentchurch fancy, 22nd of July, 1811."" "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" "Bruiser!" ""There's more at stake in this fancy" ""than the considerable purse of 200 guineas... that of national pride."" ""To tumultuous applause from a strong loop of pride, the combatants set to."" "Foul!" ""A foul was called" ""after Skelton was seen smashing Dean's head against the ring's post."" "We'll need the second umpire." "Yes or no?" "Yes or no?" "Foul!" "Yeah!" "As the Bruiser and the Killer slug it out, the gloves are also coming off back at the house." "Hi, Mrs. Rogers." "Determined to attract the master's attention, the countess approaches her chaperone with an immodest proposal." "And I know you'll appreciate this because, as we've discussed before, we're both very good girls at school." "The thing with very good girls is that when they're bad..." "They are very, very bad." "Yes, absolutely." "with this very Regency Regency idea, but only one that can be played by a lady of very, very high status." "So, the precedent for it is that very naughty lady," "Lady Caroline Lamb, who, over dinner apparently, either at Lord Melbourne's or at some other country house, served herself up... as one of the courses." "Yes, I'm feeling faint, I'm feeling faint!" "But..." "My first thought is, "What was she wearing?"" "Well, "Not very much" is the answer, because she was meant to be eaten." "So... she will be covered..." "I'm delighted to hear that." "But by fruits, vines, etc." "And apparently she came in on a silver platter, but I don't know if we could quite manage that." "But you must be decent." "I mean, she presumably must have been married when she did it." "Mmm, so I will have..." "I will be covered." "So you've got to be relatively careful that you are not so shocking that you become unmarriageable." "Yes, that's true." "Come on, Yankee!" "Come on!" "Leave your man down." "He's going to get up." "Leave your man down." "The Kentchurch Bruiser did not come to scratch on time." "Gentlemen, I authorize the purse holder to hand over his 200 guineas to today's victor, Matt Skelton." "Killer... well done, sir." "Fantastic fight." "Fantastic fight." "Fantastic fight." "Mr. Gorell Barnes is..." "is a very attractive man." "And he looks fantastic in his Mr. Darcy outfit," "I have to say... very decorative and elegant." "is very against the idea of men and women just being friends and... and talking to each other a lot." "And I think, yeah, we're still kind of quite playful, because you need a bit of excitement in the house, because otherwise, it is a bit boring." "You need someone to dress for dinner for." "How wonderful." "Definitely some people didn't even know it was me." "And then some were, like, "Is that the countess?"" "Oh, my God!" "Is that your real bust, then?" "I couldn't see people's reactions;" "I could just hear." "I just don't think they knew what to do with themselves." "Welcome to Disney, Princess." "I'm hoping the chaperone reaction isn't too extreme, because of course, it is very bad behavior." "Very seductive." "Very seductive, isn't she?" "Ladies and gents, shall we raise our glasses to the countess to drink to, uh... rude food?" "Rude food." "I think everyone thinks the Regency is a very Jane Austen kind of time and everyone being prim and in bonnets, but then there were certain people who had a lot more fun." "Oi, oi, I'm watching." "The latest technology arrives at the Regency House." "The Regency was an age distinguished for applying scientific theory to practical use." "It saw the building of the first proper roads, railways and the high-pressure steam engine." "Even on the domestic level, there were very important breakthroughs." "This newfangled invention called a shower has arrived at Kentchurch Court." "It is literally the first time that I feel properly, properly clean in 6½ weeks." "For people who had only known the light of the sun and the flicker of candles and oil lamps, gaslights were awesome, even frightening." "By 1814, London's Piccadilly was lit up with gas, but only the more progressive houses had the new lights indoors." ""The gas not only burns with a lighted taper" ""it is brought into contact with, but it explodes with all the violence of gunpowder."" "And now I'm sitting in a house with one of these contraptions." "because these things are going to go poof and kill us all." "Sorry to bother you, sir." "A package has arrived." "Oh." "Thank you very much." "it's a fantastic white light comes out of that." "I think we could get up to some mischief with this, you know." "Scientists were becoming celebrities..." "And scientific experiments became popular in the home." "Mr. Gorell Barnes, I'd like to propose this gentleman..." "Mr. Foxsmith wants his Regency host to devote a week" ""Scientific experimentation gives a unique opportunity" ""for young men and women to cooperate unchaperoned." ""I'm sure this fact as well as your keenness for information" "Foxsmith has already been using science as a pretext to woo one lady in particular..." "Chaperone Lady Devonport." "I do find other people's enthusiasms and passions very attractive." "That will help doing the experiments so we don't go blind, because that..." "He's here because he is a scientist and he is interested in the sort of dawn of science as it was then." "Right, I feel some experiments coming on shortly." "Some explosive experiments, I hope." "Just fantastic rants... they're very, very funny, they're absolutely marvelous." "But they might think they were slightly mad if you were someone who didn't appreciate just how colorful and delicious somebody being that... kind of interested in something is." "What's the state of play with Lady Devonport?" "Eh, quite an old married couple by now." "Married couple by now, are they?" "I'm sure it'll be a long-standing affair." "Well, I mean, I know that comments were made about how public their affection for each other was becoming, um, but unfortunately, I'm not sure that I've noticed much curtailing of that public display." "They said they weren't going to curtail any public display." "Oh, dear, I think I've got a thorn." "Ordinarily, Lady Devonport and Mr. Foxsmith should not be seen exchanging intimacies." "But the pursuit of science lends their growing relationship the veneer of respectability." "I can't breathe in this waistcoat." "Are they falling in love?" "I mean, I did..." "I did think about this." "I think there would be a possibility that perhaps they would, yeah." "I think it would be rather sweet, because he's a bit bonkers and she's a bit bonkers," "The logic was that the sun was always there;" "no matter which side of the Earth the sun was." "But in order to get darkness, a veil was drawn across it and there was tiny rips in that imperfect veil." "In those tiny rips the sun shone through, which is why you've got the stars." ""Imperfect veil."" "I love the idea of a ripped, imperfect veil." "To use that somehow, that you could peer through the veil and find... find the things and, um, jewels of the sky..." "Jewels in the sky, something like that." "Lady Devonport and Foxsmith are writing a tribute to their Regency counterparts, whose passion was to make sense of their world." "There's the Pleiades, and there's the..." "Where knowledge was scarce," "Regency scientists were not afraid to reach into the realms of the imagination." ""An aerial ballet every night, the theater of the skies" ""on an indigo velvet backdrop, its dance before our eyes," ""Eternal light and loveliness, motion that won't fail," "Looking up to heaven through the tears in the imperfect veil."" "Oh...!" "All I've got to say is:" "Are you having a laugh?" "Regency menstruation is so not a good look." "It is disgusting, damp and unbearable." "I don't know how on earth they put up with it." "This is just not going to work... because it does that and, um..." "I'm sorry, but this..." "it's just going to... that... it's going to last two minutes." "I was dreading this, and now I know why." "First of all I thought it'd be okay, but it is ridiculous." "I couldn't even put the thing on properly." "You've got to tie it, for crying out loud." "How on earth do they expect anybody" "Women often retreated to their rooms throughout menstruation, the excuse being given that they were "indisposed."" "Because we are both married ladies and very experienced married ladies, we'd like to tell you this evening about the birds and the bees." "the chaperones are giving their ladies a Regency biology lesson." "But before you even consider birds or bees, you must get a title." "It is the only thing that matters." "Where you get them from, it doesn't matter, but the older, the crummier, the nearer death the titleholder is, the more fun you will have." "I kind of have become kind of quite giggly and girlie" "It's like I have regressed into a childhood thing, and the idea of kind of being a sexually attractive woman to somebody, um... it kind of doesn't sit right, it doesn't feel right," "and, you know, I kind of find it quite disturbing that somebody may perceive me in that way." "Someone who certainly does see heiress Miss Hopkins in that way" "In Regency terms, they're a perfect match." "Well, it just happens that the first few days, me and Miss Hopkins sort of felt a connection, and, uh... and it's really difficult talking with the guys, because..." "I probably shouldn't be saying this, but, well, I'm a bit pissed, but you know, blatantly, me and Miss Hopkins have had a bit of a... bit of a snog on a couple of occasions." "Now, we have here some little pieces of equipment you might think are little mini-reticules." "You'd be right, because they are." "They're handy for odd guinea" "Condoms were called "French letters,"" "because they arrived flat in the post and were a defense against syphilis, the "French disease."" "They were only ever used with prostitutes." "Thankfully, no men in this house" "Oh, don't you believe it, Miss Hopkins." "Regency men were encouraged to be sexually active." "Their prospective wives, however, were not." "The more I learn about men, the more I just think," ""You know what?" "I can't be bothered with you."" "Like, why does anyone ever get married?" "Goodness knows why they did in the Regency times, because you know, they'd be forced to have loads of children, so..." "Well, not that they had much contraceptive choice anyway, but you know, the men would be desperately trying to produce" "No, thank you, I'll steer well clear of that." "The constraints placed on the women are felt all the more keenly because of their lack of physical activity... something that was never a problem for Regency men." "Master of the house Mr. Gorell Barnes has challenged his footmen to a game of Regency football." "Oh, we're going to slaughter them." "Very simple... we'll just tell them to get out of the way." "If they have the ball, we'll tell them to stop." "We'll just take the ball and kick them in the goal." "It wasn't all plain sailing for the men." "The pressure was on to play hard and rough." "Excuse me!" "Wig off, that's a foul." "Are any of you bruised from your exertions?" "I've got a torn calf muscle, and I nearly fell off the horse this morning." "The first port of call in the event of injury would be the local bonesetter, or surgeon." "This is the amputation saw." "This is only for the bone." "Surgeons came in three classes:" "the educated elite, the doctor surgeon and the old-fashioned traveling surgeon, who might also be a barber or blacksmith." "Gallstones." "Indeed, sir, so you are... you are well informed." "What are they for?" "Gallstones." "It is inserted until it reaches the bladder, and then upon reaching the bladder it is flipped over..." "To lie against the base of the bladder, and we then take a suitable knife and cut you." "The best practitioners could have a stone out in a minute." "You have to operate quickly." "Because of the pain?" "That's right." "I have some gallstones." "Have you indeed?" "Yeah, I mean, if you want to..." "Would any of you be bled?" "Bad blood was believed to be the root of all ills, so bloodletting became a common remedy." "The leeches will attend to any bruises." "Leeches were applied for everything... fever or a hangover or even to freshen the body for spring." "Now we'll see whether he wants to play." "Oh, something's happening." "Do you feel a bite?" "Mmm, it's sort of a tickling bite." "Feeling it a bit?" "Fluffy." "Oh, that's it, yeah, he's engaged." "Has he bitten?" "Yeah, no, I feel that, definitely." "Is he heading for the kill?" "Can someone hold this?" "It does make you more attractive." "Definitely makes you... a man with a leech on his arm is, you know, irresistible." "I thought it would be nice if, um, we could all see each other properly." "God, I can see you all for the first time." "You're all rather beautiful, aren't you?" "Gas." "Joining the party is Regency House physician Dr. Kevin Ilsley." "Physicians were gentlemen." "They were educated and expensive, but with limited practical ability, they often did their patients more harm than good." "Women would write gloomily about being pregnant again and the dangers that were inherent in it." "So they were really entering a sort of vale of death, really." "Yeah, well, yes, they were, and there was... there was that threat, and of course, it was... it was no respecter of persons." "I mean in... in 1817 we had Princess Charlotte... at the age of 21 she had a long and lingering death as a result of childbirth." "The other thing that is so different from today is the number of children that women had... an average of six or seven, and of course, the... the havoc that that wreaked with their anatomy in scarring and so on," "which must have made..." "Oh!" "intercourse, lovemaking quite..." "Painful and unpleasant as time went on." "One in three women died in childbirth." "I had no idea it was as desperate as that." "That is so terrifying, to imagine that..." "Oh, dear, I can hardly put my head around that." "I'm Mr. Foxsmith." "Very pleased to meet you." "In 1816 Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein, the story of a scientist who made a monster out of body parts and brought it to life with electric shocks." "Mercury to work the electric motor." "This is a battery here?" "Copper, zinc and this with acid on it?" "That's right." "Right, this is all excellent-looking stuff." "Foxsmith is taking delivery of some early electrical apparatus." "Um... oh, come over here and have a look at this." "You might be well impressed, actually, if you want to make electricity." "You might be quite good at this." "You can hold it, hold there, and I can hold this, and I thrust..." "To Regency men and women, these were fashionable toys." "They also experimented with electric shocks to treat ague, blindness and hysteria." "Do we get to electrocute anybody?" "We've got plenty of footmen that are willing... to volunteer for that." "Good, good... that's what I like, willing footmen." "Bend over." ""Oh, they're so naughty!"" "Early scientists also used kites in an attempt to harness electricity from lightning." "Foxsmith is preparing a tribute to these brave men." "He's also hoping to generate a spark among the group." "So, are you going to go for Everett then or what, Miss Hopkins?" "No." "No?" "No." "Why is my love life the topic of today's discussion?" " Really." " I'm sorry." "I just I mean," "I'm quite happy being single, thanks." "I think Mr. Everett's great." "He has a heart of gold." "He's just an all-around great guy." "This place is like living in a fairy tale... and..." "I could see myself being swept up in it all and... it scares me... it really, really scares me." "Kite makers..." "Sorry, I was on my way to my bath and a letter's arrived which I thought we'd all like to hear." "It's rather good news." "Um, it's from our friend Mr. Carrington." "Who is coming back to join us." "He enjoyed his time so much at Kentchurch over the weekend that "I can't wait to get back there and be amongst such illustrious company."" "So isn't that good news?" "Very good news." "Everyone happy?" "You know, it'll be nice to have some music back in the house." "And that's the only reason?" "And a nice, happy, smiling face." "On his earlier weekend visit, musician Mr. Carrington touched a chord with Miss Hopkins." "When Mr. Carrington came for the weekend, it was like a breath of fresh air walking into this house." "Something just kind of clicked inside me, and, um... and, uh..." "The hostess's companion, Miss Martin, is helping Miss Hopkins make a love token to greet Mr. Carrington." "This looks wicked great." "Chaperone Mrs. Hammond is so thrilled at the prospect of having an attractive musician back at the house, she's hired a grand piano." "This is just what we needed." "Perfect." "Music has ever been a conduit for amour." "But a Regency musician only had the social advantages of a senior servant... hardly a suitable candidate for Miss Hopkins." "I've just spilt yellow paint everywhere." "Does it hide it?" "Ah, that's really, really nice." "Nice." "Ladies, gentlemen." "Oh!" "Well, that's a proper piano." "Oh, that's so good." "Anyway, come on, come and have a drink and then sort of settle in." "Thank you so much." "That's so amazing." "I can't believe it." ""Here's a little something from me to you" ""to welcome you back to Kentchurch Court." ""It's good to have you back, mate." "Fondest regards, Miss Hopkins."" "Look at this tambourine she's done." "That is so amazing." ""Follow the beat of your heart."" "God, I'm really getting blown away today." "I want to go home." "I want to go home." "Foxsmith's scientific kite-flying initiative has had the desired effect." "He's finally got the women out of the house and away from the chaperones... except, of course, Lady Devonport." "Okay, you ready?" "You ready?" "Come on, fly!" "Yeah!" "Oh, no!" "I'm really, really pleased that he's back." "He just breathes a ray of sunshine." "The atmosphere is just electric." "It never works..." "Go, go!" "You're looking very beautiful, Lady Devonport." "This isn't only the search for faster, higher, keener, better, better-looking;" "this is the search for truth." "Come on, you two!" "They're getting better with kites." "They're understanding forces better." "By understanding forces better, they're understanding the planets better." "By understanding the planets better, they're understanding their own universe better." "By understanding their own universe better, they're understanding their own world better." "By understanding their own world, they're understanding themselves better." "It's not just about flying a kite here." "Ready, go!" "Yes!" "Oh, go!" "Oh!" "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to a scientific and proven method of this Regency period." "A certain Mr. Fowler states that "Is it not the duty of young persons," ""before entering a proper marriage state," ""to know the characteristics and dispossession of those who are their partners?"" "Phrenology, an early 19th century attempt to read a person's character by plotting the bumps on their head... a must for those looking to find the perfect husband." "Nicely." "Sorry." "Couldn't you try to be nice?" "What, like that?" "Yeah." "This is science;" "it's not meant to be a head massage." "Thanks to Mr. Foxsmith's unfailing efforts to use science to inspire passion," "Miss Hopkins gets to make a move on Mr. Carrington." "You have clean hair, which is great." "Honestly, you don't have very many lumps on your head." "Did you not have any bumps when you were a child?" "I'm kind of perfect, you know?" "And I just sat there; no one came up to touch my head, so after about a couple of minutes I thought," ""I'm not going sit here and wait for someone or go and ask somebody if they wanted to feel my head."" "I'd rather just, um, come and breathe some night air and, uh, hopefully that'll..." "that nonsense and, you know... we'll do something else for the evening." "Mr. Everett would be the more sincere, truer, genuine kind of guy, and I think Mr. Carrington will break my heart." "The countess has invited anatomist Gunther von Hagens" "The Regency was, after all, the age that invented the autopsy." ""Liebe Comtesse, I am very pleased" ""that you have taken the time to send me correspondence" ""from your Kentchurch house party." "the detail and functioning of our bodies."" ""My work with plastinates is as unique as the first steps taken by earlier anatomists."" ""I look forward to meeting you." "Professor Gunther von Hagens."" "Ladies, I've taken the liberty of inviting a special guest who's an anatomist... called Professor von Hagens, to Kentchurch." "He's going to come here?" "The one that strips the muscles and..." "I presume that his demonstration will take place after dinner." "He's so controversial." "Demonstration of what?" "I would very much like him to do a dissection of some description." "It'll be absolutely fascinating to see what he brings with him." "Professor von Hagens arrives." "The many medical breakthroughs that were made at this time were made by men like him... men who looked inside corpses to identify the causes of disease." "He could be a bit of a disturbing dinner guest." "Definitely don't think he should be sitting next to Mrs. Rogers, actually." "God, this is going to be much more... yes, worrying than I'd thought." "Medical advance led to a growing demand for bodies." "But the law restricted supply, opening the way for grave robbers." "When new legislation allowed for paupers to be anatomized, there was a public outcry against all who meddled with the dead." "The fear that people have against dead bodies..." "Something that's rotting and something that's decaying, there is a huge instinctive urge to just keep away from it." "How soon after death has occurred do you start working?" "Well, in the summertime..." "In the wintertime, even five, six weeks, as long at the body is kept cool, when there is some green coloration," "I still can fix it with chemicals." "Professor von Hagens' speciality is plastination... the use of chemical resins to preserve bodies in dramatic poses." "And do you have plans to have yourself plastinated?" "Certainly." "I dissected a good friend of mine." "He died with the age of 48." "He never thought of becoming plastinated until he got carcinoma of the kidney." "And then he said, "Well, I'm too young to go to the cemetery." "So I tried to do it, because I felt obliged." "But I must say, in terms of mourning work... to come over his death, to digest his death... it was very successful." "he stretches across the barrier of death." "Bodies were expensive, and anatomists had to pay for their research." "They raised money by entertaining wealthy patrons with demonstrations of their work." "I just take the people apart in my mind... before I even take the scalpel in my hand." "In this way I'm an artist." "In this way I'm a sculptor." "As you say, you can look at somebody, you can see the different layers, you know." "And we're not used to looking at a person and seeing them in that way." "I know what is inside, you know." "Look, when I take a lady's shoulder" "I know exactly what is now between my finger and my thumb." "You mentioned you might look at somebody you see a muscle move and you know what's adjacent to that." "Have you had the experience with anybody tonight?" "Oh, yes." "Did you see here the muscle... how it comes up?" "Please swallow again." "When this comes up, it's very..." "Exciting?" "I was kind of sat opposite the professor." "He was eating a blackberry fool at the time, and he just kind of looked directly at me." "He looked me straight in the eye, and he raised his eyebrow." "And, um, you know when you kind of see somebody looking at you and you think, "They're looking at me,"" "and they're thinking, "I want you for your body"?" "Well, he was thinking that, but for all the wrong reasons." "The body is so complex, and there is so much unknown." "The more I learn anatomy, the more anatomical questions are generated." "So, for me the body is more of a secret than for you." "Yes." "The professor has invited the guests to make close inspection of his plastinates." "Von Hagens' inspiration was the French artist Honoré Fragonard." "Fragonard plastinated a complete horse and rider using liquid metals in the 1790s." "I'd like to bring you back into the Regency time of Frankenstein." "With the electricity just invented at this time, just discovered, that there was in the mind of the people it could perhaps bring to life kind of newly put-together body out of parts... out of body parts." "In this way, I am more than Frankenstein." "I don't need the kind of electric blunder." "I animate the body not by electricity but by putting them in lifelike pose." "The most significant advance of Regency anatomy was in understanding the female body." "Until then, a woman's body was seen simply as an inferior version of a man's." "I wonder who she was." "Oh, don't start thinking things like that." "because that's the thing he was saying, that..." "Funny enough... it looks like a model, do you know what I mean?" "It doesn't look real." "Do you get that feeling?" "It doesn't look like a real human being." "Wow." "I feel compelled to look and look and look and look and look." "Apparently the eye is a third real, a third glass, and all... the eyelashes are two-thirds real." "every single other thing is completely real." "Lady Devonport takes the lead!" "Don't push me!" "The seat needs to be about here." "Well, these were built by dangerous people" "As the Regency House science event gathers momentum," "Mr. Foxsmith introduces another innovation to the party... the velocipede." "It was the custom of men of fashion to show off by strutting about on contraptions like these." "Right, who's going to win this race?" "I don't know..." "Actually, I think Mr. Everett." "I pick Carrington to win." "Do you?" "Well, I think Everett to win." "My money's on Everett on this one." "Do you reckon?" "both contenders have a history of dislike for each other." "Rivals for the affections of Miss Hopkins," "Everett and Carrington are set to battle it out" "It's a two-horse race..." "anything could happen." "Come on, pedal." "Oh, no, run, I mean." "What are we supposed to do here?" "Oh, no!" "Everett, you have to pick that up." "Come on, Everett." "Keep up." "Oh, he's missed the footman." "Nice action with the steering." "Oh!" "Brilliant." "No, they're going through it anyway." "Excellent race." "Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner." "Mr. Everett and I wouldn't kind of go anywhere, and one of the reasons why I am so sure about that is because I've had the chance to meet Mr. Carrington." "Being a 21st-century girl, I'm also frightened of being hurt" "So all I can do is be myself and try and spend time with him." "Um, maybe, kind of using the purpose of the game, try to get my chaperone to engineer some time so we can genuinely spend time to getting to know each other, because at the end of the day" "we haven't spent that much time together." "On your marks... get ready..." "Hypnotherapist Tom Fortes-Mayer arrives at the Regency House." "Mesmerists, as they were then called, were doctors of the heart and mind." "Many were fashionable quacks;" "others were motivated by genuine scientific inquiry." "Now you may soon find your mind begins to wander." "My words as a melody may move through your system." "Leaving romance aside," "Mr. Carrington returns to his first love, music." "He's reliving an historic hypnotic experiment." "And I want you imagine that whilst you play, actually you can see the energy, that magnetism, that movement moving from your soul through that instrument." "Mozart wrote the opera Così fan tutte while being hypnotized by the famous Anton Mesmer." "Mr. Fortes-Mayer will have equal success with him." "and create some power, some change you could make" "Yes, a piece of music, but the fact that it went to changing some aspect of this world, something that you could be proud in doing, to which your music could stand as a testament to your position." "Mr. Carrington and I ended up in a clinch last night... and I quickly scurried off to bed to prevent any further... um, misdemeanors." "seven, eight, open your eyes, nine, ten, wide awake, wide awake." "Whoa." "that Mr. Carrington blabbed about it to all the boys and Mr. Everett took great umbrage, which is not surprising at all." "While waiting for his own hypnotically inspired music" "Carrington plays Così fan tutte to the ladies." "Turn." "I saw him as a threat to what I was trying to achieve here, as far as certainly one lady is concerned." "Anyway, it was clear there was an encounter between Carrington and Hopkins last night." "That's cool." "because I can finally stop thinking about this woman." "And now the ballpark is open again for me." "She's a really, really lovely person, and she's got a heart of gold." "I'm not reciprocating something that she wants." "I can't do it in here and I..." "To any deep extent, it's just not possible." "And... you know, um, the more I'm pushed, you know, by someone or something, then probably the quicker I'll recoil." "I would like to be there as a protector and also to note down anything that I see." "I can't wait." "Foxsmith is making preparation for an intimate ghost watch for two." "No... stay." "I need a large cruet of wine and two glasses next to the bed." "Because Lady Devonport is so much older, she certainly has a lot more instincts and she can see things and understand people." "She's a perfect person." "And we just connected to each other completely," "I think, the first time we met." "And I do love Lady Devonport." "The party gather to celebrate the culmination of their week of science." "they were completely aware that the sun had spots and the spots were going across the face of the sun." "Foxsmith has contrived a human orrery." "It proved to them that the sun in fact wasn't stationary but turning round and round and round and that Earth turns around once a day... turn around once a day." "Orreries were mechanical models used to demonstrate the rotating orbits of the planets." "The next planet we get is..." "Can we have Venus over here..." "Venus, the goddess of love?" "Ladies and gentlemen, look far with science, look more clearly with science." "A round of applause to all of our volunteers who were planets." "There we are." "It was a very nice note saying she was definitely one of the reasons for coming back, because she's just a great laugh... but that I just didn't feel comfortable pursuing anything." "There's kind of not really that much chemistry between Mr. Carrington and I." "I think maybe it was just the kind of excitement and I know that he's certainly not giving me any indication that it's reciprocated on his side." "You know, we've got this really bizarre situation where Everett likes me and I don't like him, and I like Mr. Carrington and he doesn't like me." "I've always said, you know, I know, when I meet somebody, I know." "But actually, I've been wrong, and it's... and it's kind of quite hard to admit that to yourself, that that kind of gut instinct isn't always right, and sometimes I've really missed." "And maybe in my past life, you know, in my past I've missed opportunities that maybe I should have taken advantage of." "It's not all about that chemistry, that spark, because that doesn't last forever." "For Miss Hopkins' chaperone, Lady Devonport," "She's preparing for her secret rendezvous with Mr. Foxsmith." "I've spent the last ten years of my life trying very hard not to get attached to people." "And it has made me think, I actually can open up and be passionate and I think it's not going to kill me; it is all right, and I'm really grateful for that." "And if anybody sees you, you can say you're going midnight riding." "I would say I do love him." "I think he's a really lovely person and I really do mind about him." "Lady Devonport." "Foxy." "So soon." "Glass of wine." "Thank you." "Would you join me?" "Here's to scientific research." "Absolutely." "Next time, take your battle stations." "Oops, sorry." "It's war." "How dare she despise me?" "Who does she think she is?" "Time at the house party is almost up, but many are still lost in the maze of love." "Well, I wish it could be me, but it isn't." "I love every part of her." "Will this storybook tale of dating and mating have a happy ending?" "He actually proposed to me." "It's the spectacular grand finale, next time at the Regency House Party." "Would you like breakfast for two, sir?" "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "When ten single men and women go back 200 years in time to look for romance, what can you expect?" "Battle stations, everyone..." "Oops, sorry." "How dare she despise me;" "who does she think she is?" "Perhaps you could have a duel." "But once the peace returns, will our storybook tale have a happy ending?" "He actually proposed to me." "Find out on the spectacular grand finale at the Regency House Party." "Would you like breakfast for two, sir?" "Captioning sponsored by WNET/THIRTEEN NEW YORK" "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:" "Week seven: the gentlemen strut their military prowess to the delight of the eligible women and their chaperones." "Our party is reliving the year 1815." "Britain has been at war with France for 23 years." "A whole generation has grown up against a background of military conflict." "The hostilities have exacted a terrible price." "A higher percentage of the population has died than in the First World War." "Fire." "We're aiming at Napoleon." "He's our number-one public enemy." "He's dead." "I've never shot with these before." "Be quite interesting, I think." "The flintlock musket that Mr. Carrington is loading was fired at the Battle of Waterloo." "When you're ready." "Just fire the trigger?" "Yeah." "Ooh!" "Ooh..." "Phew!" "Man, I've got the shakes." "That's scary stuff there." "That was a lot of fun." "Bearing in mind they'd fire off three rounds a minute, in the line he'd be all over the place, wouldn't he?" "Yeah." "With his... recoil." "That's probably not very good." "standing still next to me than flopping around the place." "Yeah, that would be sensible." "In 1815, Napoleon met his Waterloo." "But victory in Europe did not bring peace at home." "300,000 servicemen, destitute and hungry, returned to a homeland bankrupt after the long campaign." "Mobs roamed the countryside, stealing from the large estates." "As there was no police force, local militia were used to protect property." "One of these volunteer armies, made up of farmers and local laborers, has come to drill with the gentlemen, ready to confront the growing civil unrest." "Charge bayonets." "Huzzah!" "Straighten those bayonets." "Militia and volunteers, shoulder arms." "Prepare to advance in ordinary time." "Forward... march." "Left, right." "Left, right." "Left, right." "Look to your dressage, gentlemen." "Chaperone Mrs. Enright, once an army officer herself, casts a critical eye over the troops." "Well, it was the first day on the parade square but I thought Mr. Foxsmith yawning on parade was something I'd have had him marched to the guard room for." "And as for Mr. Gorell Barnes, five minutes behind everyone else, ten minutes, 15." "They need to smarten up very considerably." "March." "Left, right." "Left, right." "Left, right." "Left, right." "And halt." "Halt." "Apart from the pace and step, it was perfect." "Oops, sorry." "Right... and halt." "Halt." "Master of the house, Mr. Gorell Barnes, invites his guests to celebrate Napoleon's downfall." "Joining them is historian Andrew Roberts, an expert on the wars." "I'd just like everyone to know this is a dinner in celebration of the fine victory at Waterloo." "And also I'd like to welcome Mr. Roberts to Kentchurch." "I hope you enjoy dinner and your stay." "So, um... enjoy your dinner." "Ma'am, this evening we have soupe la reine, escargot bourgogne..." "Despite the conflict, it remained fashionable to pepper conversation with French words and serve French food." "So what do you make of the spread?" "After dinner, the table is transformed into the battlefield of Waterloo." "almost as much is psychology as is military strategy." "These action replays of the Duke of Wellington's finest hour were popular." "Andrew Roberts describes the moment when, after ten hours, the tide of battle turned." "imperial guard marched straight through the center..." "Emperor Napoleon was certain that by deploying his crack troops, the Imperial Guard, he would annihilate the allied forces." "However, what he didn't appreciate was" "Wellington's brilliant ploy which was that on the reverse slopes were, hidden behind them, large forces of British infantry." "Gentlemen." "And they were asked to stand up and suddenly present their many thousands of muskets to pour a withering fire into the front ranks." "I just don't believe we have any concept of it in our time." "I was thinking about World War I" "And we think that's a long time." "23 years." "It was just the weirdest idea." "which was a massive central thrust through the enemy center." "And it wasn't just the men who went to war." "I didn't realize the actual sort of girlfriends of soldiers would literally follow behind their brigade and go in and save their loved one in a moment of sort of desperation." "I mean, these were just fields of complete kind of bloodshed, and just bodies and limbs and things everywhere." "And how they actually worked out how close they were," "I don't really understand, but it must have been terrifying." "The women also went onto the battlefield... to rob and murder the enemy wounded." "Andrew Roberts has brought back their gruesome spoil." "And here, a selection of human teeth." "These were actually, all of them, taken from the battlefield at Waterloo." "They were ripped out of the faces of the... and then they were taken back to London and sold to dentists." "I found the teeth particularly kind of moving and extraordinary and the horribleness of actually taking them out and making use of them, is really not something that 21st-century people really can probably deal with very well." "Here is a cavalry saber." "You did not use it to point as you charge so much as to try to slash as you went by." "There is something about a perfectly balanced killing tool, which is actually rather thrilling, like it or not." "Nonetheless, he would have understood as he visited those..." "those blighted fields..." "The Battle of Waterloo brought the Napoleonic Wars to an end." "After the years of conflict, soldiers and sailors like Captain Glover, tried to reestablish their life at home." "actually to be found on the battlefield." "For many, finding a wife was a priority." "For Glover, his hopes and desires have fallen on Miss Lisa Braund." "There were quite a few times in the first week or so that I did find it very difficult" "And vice-versa, when she was finding things difficult, and I've been there for her as well." "So the relationship has come out of just people caring for each other." "There's an old saying, isn't there, that if you love somebody they'll love you back." "This is really, really sweet." "It just made me laugh." "Captain Glover is hoping to entertain the house party, and in particular Miss Braund, by restaging the Battle of Trafalgar." "He has a personal connection with Nelson's famous victory over the French." "As a child, I was told of... by a distant relative of ours..." "Captain Blackwood, who was a captain and served with Nelson at the Battle of Trafalgar." "And he was actually captain of the ship Aureleus, while not one of the ships involved in the battle itself, it was the flagship that gave, sort of, the important messages to tell the fleet where to go and where not to go." "So that's sort of family connection, and I got more and more interested in what actually happened and what went on." "A naval officer could make large amounts of money by capturing enemy ships." "It was one of the few ways in which a gentleman could dramatically improve both his financial standing and his rank in Regency society." ""Dear Captain Glover, we are writing to inform you that your prize of £50,000 has now matured."" ""This is a reward for your gallantry in war."" "Some news from London." "I've had a letter from my solicitor... informing me that my prize money has come, has matured..." "For capturing a ship during the war." "Marvelous." "And, uh... so there's a sum of £50,000..." "Bloody hell." "sitting for me in London." "Under the Cruises and Convoys Act of 1708, the captain who captures a ship... the captain and the crew get two-thirds of the value, so it would be the cargo and also the ship itself would be worth a lot of money." "And it's been suggested that, um... seeing as I've been so faithful and such a patron for the Tory Party that I should buy myself a title with it." "A baronetcy." "Excellent." "So I've already instructed my solicitors to proceed." "Have a look at that." "Obviously, the status in the house" "Just wondering what your thoughts are on that, and... how it should be announced to the rest of your guests." "I don't know, I'll have to check it out." "I think..." "I think that, um..." "So that makes it you're the second-most important person in the house now, doesn't it?" "Does that mean I get wine slightly quicker or I can go horse riding whenever I want or..." "I'm not sure." "Perhaps we could redecorate your bedroom in honor..." "I like it the way it is." "Perhaps you could give me yours." "No chance." "So we'll just keep that under our hats until..." "Wait till you get it and then, uh..." "Yeah." "Glover's fortune of £50,000 would be the equivalent" "You can buy me a bottle of champagne, dear boy." "Yeah." "Well done." "After the defeat of Napoleon, the arrival of the daily newspaper... always a big event in a country house... brought home the terrible carnage of the war." "Look, here's the wounded." ""Lieutenant General, the Earl of Uxbridge, severely wounded," "Major General Cookson, severely, left arm amputated."" "Fancy being at home and reading that." "You know, being a member of the family or something and just getting that." "Amazing losses, yes." "In the upper section of society there would be in the next generation" "Also pathetically concerned about the horses." "Oh, terrible." "Terrible carnage." "And the regimental farrier would cut off the right foreleg of every horse, the hoof, which was marked with its army number, so they could tot up what your equine casualties were your regiment was entitled to..." "the remounts." "And some people kept their hooves and you have them for inkwells..." "Yes, inkwells, yes, yes." "You get them in antique shops." "They're very moving, I find." "Very moving." "Very sad." "Master of the House, Mr. Gorell Barnes, is setting out on his regular patrol of his country estate." "his property would have swallowed up smaller farms leaving most local people totally dependent on him." "He would even tell them how to vote." "he would give his tenants and servants a well-earned holiday." "Morning." "I've got good news." "We're going to have a fair on Saturday, and all the servants are having the day off." "So, um, from 12:00 on Saturday until basically you wake up on Sunday morning." "So there's to be no protocol from them." "They will be as, you know, as we are to each other, if you like." "We'll be naked; we won't be able to get dressed." "You'll have to help each other." "Oh, good plan." "undoing each other's corsets before then." "Apart from Christmas, this was the only official holiday a servant had in the whole year." "And we're all really, really excited, and we don't have to wear our hats, and we don't have to wear our aprons anymore because they're our marks of service." "This is very exciting." "The summer fair was the highlight of the year, and for the men and women of the house party, this is a rare occasion to spend the day together." "With everybody off to the fair, the house is an open invitation to burglars, risky with so many desperate ex-servicemen roaming the land." "These deterrents may not look that effective close up, but from afar they did give some impression there were people in the house." "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the fair." "lots of fun games, drinking, lots of fine food." "So I just hope you all enjoy yourselves." "Charge your glasses and have fun." "Go!" "Go on, girls!" "She's storming ahead." "She wants that dress." "Every fair had a smock race." "Well done." "For the poorer women, this is more than a game." "It would cost a maid three weeks' wages to buy enough material to make this simple dress." "Miss Lisa Braund has personally embroidered it." "Go on, Jack!" "Go on, Jackson!" "Let me take your blind, poor thing." "Yes, in your own time." "Another traditional game was climbing a pole covered in duck grease to win a flitch of bacon." "Come on, Zack!" "Come on, Zack!" "For the workers, living on vegetables with the occasional broth made from bones, a juicy cut of meat would have been a rare treat." "Come on, Geoff." "Well-done, Geoffrey." "For a few hours, master and servant are equal." "Head down, Carrington." "And here for the first time, maid and mistress are allowed to mix socially." "I mean, you're still sort of smiling at us all." "You sort of... you must work so hard." "It's been a really lovely day because it's been a chance to just to speak to the maids sort of as people which is very nice, and they've let their hair down, literally." "But, yeah, you can't ever ignore them because you actually do feel slightly because we're all these big helpless children without them." "They dress us in the morning and send us off and then at night they undress us" "I have my maids often leaning out the window going," "Come inside immediately and put your bonnet on."" "So it's that kind of relationship." "Come on, Carrington!" "Come on!" "Carrington, go, go, go!" "Captain Glover takes advantage of the relaxation of protocol." "That's not very Regency, Miss Braund." "It's not the first time the captain has kissed Miss Lisa Braund." "Uh... uh..." "Who... who... who told you that?" "Uh, yes, he did try and kiss me." "Stop it." "But, you know, he's a very tactile person, anyway." "So this whole hands-off stuff doesn't seem to work with Captain Glover." "No, he's, um, yes, twice, actually." "At one point Mrs. Hammond did turn round and went, "Are you kissing Captain Glover?"" "And I was like, "No, he's trying to kiss me."" "Captain Glover has paid special attention to Miss Braund, a lady of modest means." "With his prize money, of which she is unaware, he would be an excellent catch for her, but Miss Braund's affections have lain elsewhere." "I really used to like Mr. Everett and I know that he really liked Victoria, and there was a whole kind of triangle thing going on and Victoria was trying to get me and Mr. Everett together." "I really had a crush on him." "I thought, "My God, this guy is amazing."" "Now I just think, no, he's a really nice bloke." "But there's nothing more." "Although it's really quite funny because, uh, me and Captain Glover had an argument just after the Mr. Everett thing." "He did actually turn around to me and went, "Why can't you just get over Everett?" "Why can't you just get over him, and fancy me?"" "I went, "That would make it so much simpler, Captain Glover." "The life would be much simpler if I could just fancy you."" "We parted, and we weren't speaking very much the next day, and I think he winked across the table at me, and I thought, "Okay, we're back to being friends again."" "I think he's absolutely lovely and we're really, really good friends." "So part of me just thinks, oh, why don't you fancy him?" "He's so nice to me." "Come on, Geoff." "So is Miss Braund reconsidering her feelings for the tenacious Glover?" "The day after the fair, as the ladies are eating luncheon, the atmosphere is tense." "For some weeks, there has been growing hostility between the hostess, Mrs. Rogers, and chaperone Mrs. Enright." "Mrs. Enright, with her charge, Miss Conick, form the lowest ranking pair in the house." "She is the least important lady here." "Her charge is the least important one, and she would be bending over backwards not to cause offense to me because she wants to stay here." "Because she just pisses me off." "I mean, for God's sake, you know, she can... she certainly lets everybody know how clever she is." "Mrs. Rogers made a very big thing of the status issue right at the beginning, um, and endeavored, as I saw it... and her voice, her tone and body language convinced me that this is what she meant to do to humiliate me" "We're all doing the best we possibly can." "From the start, Mrs. Rogers and Mrs. Enright" "Weeks ago, they clashed over their respective charges." "You have tried to cast aspersions on her." "I have not done that on your charge." "I have been asked what I thought about her, and I said." "I haven't meant to be rude to you." "I've meant to be clear about my feelings." "It's all in the perception, I believe, mm-hmm." "I have a particular character to deal with whose behavior is irreproachable." "Do stop saying that." "It's getting terribly boring, madam." "Yes, and I'm getting tired of the generalizations which suggest that her behavior is less than satisfactory." "I have forgiven, forborne, and I have reached the end of my capability there now." "For goodness sake, we've got 12 days or ten days left here." "Why can't everybody just really enjoy those last ten days without having something as pathetic as somebody's little vendetta, you know, ruining everything?" "I have now got the very, very contemporary feeling... make no mistake, this has nothing to do with 1811... how dare she despise me?" "Independently she's a complete nobody and I am somebody, and I am getting very close to telling her that." "The tensions between Mrs. Rogers and Mrs. Enright finally explode." "Of course." "Um, Jesus, did you hear that?" "What's happened?" "Are you okay?" "No, I mean, that was awful." "Come and sit down." "What's been broken?" "A plate." "Mrs. Enright then said that she'd had enough of Mrs. Rogers, that she was going to pursue her to an early grave, that she was a foolish old woman, a crashing snob and something else and she threw her plate up the room," "and walked out of the room." "And Mrs. Rogers is very..." "naturally, very shaken." "I have never broken any crockery over an argument before in my entire life." "But if you put a prick in an animal's backside long enough, it'll eventually kick, won't it?" "A little bit shaken, because I don't think anybody has ever behaved like that to me before." "This has been ongoing." "This has been an onslaught going on and on and on every day." "And it's horrible to watch and it's horrible to witness." "I don't know what I've done wrong." "I've tried to avoid an uproar, tried to avoid losing my own dignity, which matters a good deal to me, but if you don't deal with these things, this is what happens." "At the first attack a bully has to be identified and warned immediately not to do it." "This all along has smacked in some way of bullying and I can't bear it." "And I can't bear unkindness of this level, either." "I have a horrible feeling you might be asked to apologize to her." "I have a horrible feeling I might be asked to apologize to her." "And what will happen?" "I have a horrible feeling we both might be asked to leave." "Well, I'm sorry if I've done that to you, Hayley." "Well, no, you had to do what you had to do." "It's just something that just occurred to me just afterwards." "It's within the power of the hostess to ask Mrs. Enright to leave." "She could stop goading me." "And if she does, then her charge, Miss Conick, will have to leave, too." "Mrs. Rogers is comforted by her charge, the countess." "It feels like being someone's second, doesn't it?" "Like she's my chaperone." "and it is kind of like you're the backup," "It should be, but it's kind of looking the other way around." "I never, ever expected to chaperone my chaperone." "We all chaperone our chaperones." "Mr. Gorell Barnes has been forced to mediate, even though no Regency man would expect to involve himself in women's affairs." "The fact of the matter is what is concerning me here is there is 14 people in the house here and the biggest problem seems to be coming" "Mrs. Hammond and Mrs. Rogers seem to be one side, and you and Lady Devonport seem to be another side." "Not willingly." "Well, not willingly, but this is how I see it." "What I would like to do is if you two can sort out your differences between you in a..." "I'm not going to be spoken to like that in public, I'm afraid." "Okay, well, fair enough." "I'm not taking sides with anybody here because I just would like you to sort it out, okay?" "And I think that if you can't both..." "It is not my job." "Can I finish, can I finish?" "If you can't both be adult about this if you don't get on with each other, avoid each other." "I'm willing to do that, absolutely." "I am willing to avoid Mrs. Rogers 100%." "But if you are going to avoid Mrs. Rogers 100%," "Mrs. Enright, then you may as well not be here." "Would you like me to volunteer to leave?" "Is that what you'd like?" "That's not what I'm saying." "It's not a question of volunteering." "But it's a question of whether or not we can just try and get on with each other and perhaps work out the differences." "But we can only do that if Mrs. Rogers and I talk together." "Well, that's what I'd like you to do." "I'm willing to make that attempt." "I'll go for a walk now with Mrs. Rogers to put our cards on the table and sort it out." "Well, I'd quite like an apology, I'm afraid." "I've never been spoken to like that in my life and I think I deserve an apology." "Do you feel that you were outspoken to Mrs. Rogers and perhaps slightly too harsh?" "I feel I need time to consider that and I feel that apologies may be due on both sides." "Okay." "The chaperones were here to do a job, to get their charges married, yeah, that's what they've come here for." "If they're not going to do their job properly then I might as well ask them to leave." "They've given up on what they're here to do." "So, quite frankly, , they're useless." "Perhaps we could have a duel." "That's a good idea, I think." "If Mrs. Rogers and Mrs. Enright have a duel, one of them dies... sorted." "Mrs. Rogers takes to her bed." "She's waiting for an apology." "Underneath the trees..." "Captain Glover has planned an afternoon to commemorate the Battle of Trafalgar with a nautical picnic of salt pork washed down with rum and fresh lime." "I'm going to introduce you to a distant relative of mine," "Captain Blackwood... and there's the gentleman himself." "He looks like you, actually." "You see the curly hair there." "I can really see the resemblance." "Look to your left." "Yes..." "Needs a shave." "My hair isn't quite that gray yet, but I'm working on it." "I have a letter here from Admiral Nelson to Captain Blackwood giving instructions to keep an eye on the fleet." "So, as I pass that round, I'll read out actually..." "That's the genuine letter." "No way." "So I'll pass this round." "That's the real thing." "It goes, "To Captain, the Honorable Henry Blackwood," ""HM Ship Aureleus." ""From the Victory, October 9, 1805, AM" ""Cadiz due east, 19 leagues." ""My dear sir, many thanks for your letter of yesterday." "Let us have them out."" ""In short, watch all points and all winds and weathers," "Be assured I am ever and always yours, Nelson and Bronte."" "Wow!" "At the house, Mrs. Rogers finally receives an apology from Mrs. Enright." "We have had an éclaircissement, and all kissed and made up and become friends." "Far better understanding of each other." "And everything's better?" "Yes." "Yeah, absolutely." "I'm really pleased." "Yeah, so am I." "It's time for the Battle of Trafalgar to commence." "Fought off the coast of Spain in 1805, it was Britain's most decisive sea victory." "Can we have the British team on this side?" "British, British..." "British." "And the French... give us all a laugh." "The battle is drawn." "Say you're there, you can do that and then you get a shot." "Okay, now we're going for the kill." "The French have a shot." "Higher. further, further back." "Down, a little down..." "What, there?" "Down, like that." "Left higher, right arm down." ""Left higher, right arm down."" "Excellent." "Wicked." "Good work!" "Vive la France!" "The English have lost two ships." "They've lost two ships." "So, um, it looks like we're going to win, which is a problem, as we didn't..." "Damn Frenchies." ""Damn Frenchies," sir?" "It may look like the French are winning, but on the day, Admiral Lord Nelson had a brilliant plan." "Going for the big one." "Traditionally, ships would draw alongside." "But in an unprecedented move," "Nelson's fleet attacked the enemy at right angles." "The French and Spanish forces were unable to regroup." "Despite being heavily outnumbered, the English shattered the enemy's fleet of 33 men of war." "Oh, wow, guys, guys..." "Make it spectacular." "The victory cost Nelson his life." "But it secured Britain's supremacy at sea for the next hundred years." "¶ Rule, Britannia, Britannia rules the waves ¶" "¶ Britain never, never, never shall be slave. ¶" "After the battle, Miss Hopkins breaks Regency protocol to speak alone with Mr. Everett." "At one time they were close." "It would have been a good match... her new wealth and his old family connections... but when musician Mr. Carrington came along, everything changed." "He had neither status nor fortune, but Miss Hopkins was smitten." "This caused a serious rift between her and Mr. Everett... and they haven't spoken till now." "I had a wonderful chat with Miss Hopkins," "The two of us sort of had these storm clouds above our heads, and it was as if it rained and suddenly the sun had come out and there was this sort of a nice feeling." "I mean, we found our friendship again and we just talked really pleasant to each other." "We had a nice... we just giggled and laughed, and the cloud that has been sort of hanging over me the whole sort of thing just sort of lifted, you know." "We had a fantastic conversation on the lawn... and, uh..." "I don't know how much he told, but he, um... he actually proposed to me... uh, with a... um..." "And I declined him." "And I'm sure he won't have told you that, but I do think it's important that you know that." "I just couldn't..." "I couldn't do it." "I do like Mr. Carrington an awful lot, but I know the feeling is not reciprocated." "Is it my fault that I've gone for the wrong man, that I've kind of turned the really, really nice guys down in favor of having somebody who's maybe wrong for me?" "So it has been kind of quite a confusing time because I've not maybe allowed myself to explore any relationship with Mr. Everett." "And if I have hurt him, I am so sorry." "And maybe I have been wrong." "You know, maybe this is the lesson that I needed to learn in my life:" "Don't always listen to your heart, sometimes listen to your head." "Time has arrived to announce" "Captain Glover's entry into the aristocracy." "A highly respected peer of the realm is invited to witness the event." "make two announcements:" "Firstly, welcome Lord Temple Morris here." "It's a great honor for you to come." "Thank you very much for coming." "And some rather good news is" "Captain Glover has, for his fantastic performances at sea and his capture of an enemy boat, has been awarded a large amount of money and a baronet." "So Captain Glover is departing and Sir Jeremy is arriving." "Lord Temple Morris explains the finer points of Captain Glover's new rank." "a very nice honor to have actually because you're free to go in the House of Commons." "You don't have to go to the Lords, but you are a titled commoner, you know." "Sir Jeremy, perhaps you'd like to read your letter out?" "Yes, it's quite interesting, it's £50,000 has now matured." "I haven't spent all of it." "I put money towards a lighthouse fund." "I put some money into researching electricity." "I've put some money into sailors' widows and kept a considerable sum for myself... should you be interested in marrying now someone with not only title but a massive fortune." "My position in the house is now most senior gentleman." "I shall be sitting at the top of the table from now on." "No, I won't, I won't, no, sir." "How would your wife be known as?" ""Lady," of course." "So I might get married in the next few days which might elevate one of the ladies." "This is music to the ears of Braund's chaperone, Mrs. Hammond." "Once Miss Braund did favor Mr. Everett, um, in her heart" "She has grown increasingly fond of Captain Glover over the weeks that we've been here and we think that it's only right and natural," "Miss Braund and I, that because he has proved himself, even when he was a poor man, that he, um..." "I can't say "have the hots for Miss Braund," can I?" "That he favored Miss Braund and she should now reciprocate by agreeing." "Now that his ship has come in," "Sir Jeremy could have his pick of the women round the table." "But he remains steadfast." "And for the penniless Miss Braund, this is, indeed, good news." "I find him more and more endearing just because he's being himself and he's just being so sweet, yeah, I think if you persevere you can get what you want." "I think there is something to maybe marrying your best friend, someone you can completely rely on, who will be there for you no matter what, who's not going to disappear at the first sign of trouble," "who is going to be genuinely concerned about you." "So, um... and I think Captain Glover has all of those qualities." "Ask you all to raise your glasses and toast Sir Jeremy." "Sir Jeremy." "Thank you." "Alias Captain Glover." "Indeed, mate." "It's the last week of the Regency house party." "Two months ago, our modern-day guests arrived hoping to find love, Regency style." "This is their last chance to form an attachment." "In Regency terms, the glamorous but hard-up Mr. Carrington needs a wealthy wife to secure his place in society." "Sneaking into the lady's quarters, he's risking expulsion to make his move." "Thought I'd do a warm gesture for a very special girl." "I think this might be something that would really make her day." "It's kind of cool, isn't it?" "Bit of a path." "I've said, "You are..." ""a... truly... special..." "person."" "The lady in Mr. Carrington's sights is industrial heiress Miss Hopkins." "Her money would have made her a prize catch for any Regency gentlemen." "As far as my feelings towards Miss Hopkins goes," "I don't think they've changed at all." "I'm still very attracted to her," "I still feel the same way as I did the first day I first met her." "I think she's an amazing woman." "His parting gift to the house," "Mr. Everett is designing a maze of love." "It's arranged in the shape of a fan, that essential prop of Regency courtship." "It's a nice sort of metaphor for being in here with the complications of not only being here but the whole marriage game and stuff... trying to find your right route through life." "The maze will be more than just an amusement." "First one in... another 500 or so to go." "In a very public acknowledgment of intimacy, it would be navigated in couples." "Final partnerships will be declared, and Mr. Everett is hoping to escort Miss Hopkins." "I think the whole idea is that the couples as... as the young ladies and the young gents" "Of course, the chaperones no doubt will be watching, but you can go into the center and be away from their eyes." "So what goes on in there is anybody's guess, I think." "The only cloud on the horizon is Mr. Carrington." "Oh, as far as my..." "friendship, let's call it, we just became friends very, very quickly and, of course, that sort of quickly developed into something a bit more serious." "But, of course, the arrival of Carrington didn't exactly help the situation, put slightly the cat amongst the pigeons" "I don't know exactly what their... relationship is now, I don't want to pry into that." "I don't think anything's going on." "¶ Sleep... ¶" "But a successful serenade early on has given Mr. Carrington a distinct advantage" "¶ And may your dreams... ¶ would be the more sincere, truer, genuine... kind of guy." "And I think Mr. Carrington would break my heart." "But aren't girls always attracted to the wrong men?" "Happens every time." "Mr. Carrington is confident his charm will outweigh his meager prospects." "We've had a great friendship, and they can see that, and we're close." "is that Hopkins is wealthy here, and I'm not, and whether she wants to part with her..." "her income is a choice that her and her chaperone will have to make." "if they chose someone else for me," "I think probably it will be because they thought that Miss Hopkins should be with a person of higher status." "I think that would be the only reason that would sway it." "Now tell me, Victoria, it's been a busy, busy few weeks for you, has it not?" "With time running out for Miss Hopkins, her chaperone, Lady Devonport, presses her to choose between her two suitors." "And I've thought long and hard about it, and I've come to a decision." "Go on then." "And that is Mr. Everett." "I knew you were going to say that." "Why?" "Because you are so contrary." "Right, well, it's your life, and I like the man." "He's grand." "Because they are both great gentlemen, and there's nobody truer, more sincere, genuine, caring, sensitive than Mr. Everett in the house." "Well, I think that's entirely true." "And I know I'm very lucky to, you know, have him want me, really." "He's been consistent in his feelings for you from the very beginning." "And gorgeous though Mr. Carrington is, but if you change your mind again..." "I'll let you know." "I can't be doing all this travel agent stuff." "He'll be a very happy boy, Mr. Everett will." "And anyway, he knows the way round the maze." "Away from the romantic merry-go-round, the estate's hermit has more basic concerns." "Everything's wet, and there's a conspiracy afoot to completely starve me." "And I must have lost about two stone." "Really hungry all the time." "And they're like, "He's a hermit,"" "like he doesn't need food, he can just eat grass or something." "I'm not a deer;" "I do need food." "But the hermit has found love." "Miss Francesca, the lowest- ranking lady in the house, is fast losing her tenuous grip on gentility." "It is very romantic, you know, being a sort of filthy vagabond hermit, being visited by this exotic creature in petticoats about dinner parties, target practice, angry chaperones." "Yeah, it's like being in a wonderful story." "It has had its romantic moments." "It has had its romantic moments." "I mean, inevitably, if you're sort of thrown together in a... in a sort of cold, wet, windy day, if you have to sort of huddle together to stay warm, from a practical point of view, yeah, it's been..." "Thanks, Hermit." "Bit of romance, yeah." "There would be no going back for a Regency lady's companion who chose love over security." "As a hermit's wife, she could expect a life of harsh practicality." "What's all the juice in there?" "Did I say juice it as well as zest it?" "It's like the first time she came up here and she was... she repaired my sugar bag, which had a simple burn in it, and she was there sewing away for about three hours, and she finished it eventually." "With a huge grin, she passes, says, "I've finished,"" "And I was like, "Ah, that's very good."" "Tried to open it, and she'd sewn it right through both sides of the bag." "Didn't even check before she handed it over" "So she had to cut it all out and start again." "But now you're good at sewing, aren't you?" "Bit of a learning curve up here." "As the guests set out for a final picnic, the issue of marriage is never far from mind." "One step above Miss Francesca in status," "Miss Conick's future security would also depend on finding a good husband." "I've seen all kinds of practice." "For her, that's a problem." "I just don't think I could bear to be a married woman to a man who was legally allowed to beat me and rape and whom I couldn't divorce um... and then obliged to have children when one in three women died in childbirth." "Score." "Being a mistress might have been all right." "You had more control of your money;" "you had more control over what you did, who you spent your time with." "A career as a mistress was a high-risk business." "Success could bring independence and wealth." "But disease and destitution lay in wait for those who failed." "A letter for you, ma'am." ""Dear Mrs. Enright, with regard to my daughter Hayley," ""I'm writing to ask whether or not" ""a suitable match has now been found for her." "I shall write back to Mrs. Conick that Hayley rather shockingly proposed to me that she might go to London and become a courtesan to fund her ambition to have a literary or political salon... perhaps a combination of both." "quite how I was going to explain this to her parents, because I thought Hayley's particularly well-equipped both physically and intellectually for these tasks." "Not everyone has turned their back on the prospect of marriage." "Miss Braund has made a classic Regency compromise." "She may not have fallen head over heels in love, but she is able to see the benefits of a life spent with her wealthy best friend, Sir Jeremy Glover." "I really like the guy." "I really, really like him." "He's a massive flirt." "He's a huge, huge flirt..." "as am I, so we just kind of hit it off on that level." "And if I had the choice of all the gentlemen in the house, the gentleman I would choose would be, yes, Sir Jeremy." "Sir Jeremy, in Regency times, would be looking for a wife that could bear him children." "You would have been good friends and there to support each other, and that's what this is." "I think I tried to explain to Lisa that, you know, a knight in shining armor does need a damsel in distress." "Otherwise, he's just running around in his armor looking like a..." "like an idiot." "The question facing Miss Hopkins is not how to love, but who." "Oh, no." "Oh..." "Mr. Carrington." "Do you think?" "And to think somebody's gone to all this effort and has, you know, picked up on, you know, something that you've said in passing to make you happy is just completely overwhelming." "With his bold move," "Mr. Carrington draws ahead of Mr. Everett in the race for Miss Hopkins' heart." "How the hell did you know that?" "To be honest, I kind of probed." "Oh, really?" "It is a complete and utter fantasy... my bed strewn with rose petals." "For the last eight weeks, the guests in the Regency House have been waited on hand and foot by their dedicated servants." "Now the master wants to reward them." "As far as the footmen are concerned, there's two key rules to remember." "One is that you have to be as elegant as possible" "The second thing is that a footman, if at all possible, should be seen and not heard in the dining room." "Mr. Gorell Barnes has decided to revive the tradition of turning the social order on its head... a custom dating back to Roman times." "Trading places with their servants, the gentlemen will serve dinner to the footmen and maids." "The footmen have made it a lot less lonely for me." "I have a very good relationship with them." "They respect me, and they've been incredibly supportive." "Right, serving." "Mr. Foxsmith, would you like to, uh..." "Right, and I've worked this one out." "Could you attract my attention please?" "Red wine, please." "Certainly." "Red wine." "Sir, you haven't actually taken his glass yet, sir." "Oh, Christ." "And as I was saying, blah, blah, blah." "Sir, you have just shaken the water all over the table there, sir." "There's a certain elegance required to shake water back into the cooler." "Yes, yeah, I'm getting there." "Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah." "Oh, thank you." "Mrs. Rogers takes the countess aside." "As her chaperone and the master's guardian, she would be handsomely rewarded if she could bring them together." "What I was hoping to organize was to get Mr. Gorell Barnes to take you round the maze." "to go through the maze with Mr. Gorell Barnes." "Fine." "Well, that's what I imagined." "And it works out quite nicely, because you kind of fall into" "like if there are guests or something like that." "I think one of the guests once said to me," ""Well, you and your husband..."" "And I went..." ""No, no, no, he's not my husband."" "two, three, one, two, three, one, two, three, one, two, three, one, two..." "The end of the house party marks the climax of the guests' romantic hopes for the season." "one, two, three, join hands and one..." "Miss Hopkins is playing a dangerous game." "Having opted for Mr. Everett, she's switched her allegiance overnight to Mr. Carrington, to the dismay of her chaperone." "But Lady Devonport has a problem of her own." "And walk." "Over the summer, she's conducted a dangerous liaison with Mr. Foxsmith." "You are very, very, very handsome." "Fashionable Regency society turned a blind eye to relationships between young men and older, married women so long as they were discreet." "Ah, Lady Devonport." "Marriage, however, was out of the question." "Now that Lady Devonport and Mr. Foxsmith are about to leave the Regency, they must face the future." "Just who will go through the maze in couples has yet to be agreed." "Mr. Everett has asked the chaperones to settle the competing claims of head and heart and help resolve the final partnerships." "They will interview each of the men." "Right, let's give them hell, girls." "Absolutely." "First up, the most eligible man in the house," "Is there a lady in the house who you like more than the others?" "Yes." "Uh... one of the maids." "Well, right, which maid is it, sir?" "Forgive us, but we have collected the impression that you and the countess were on warmly affectionate terms." "Perhaps." "Perhaps." ""Perhaps."" "You're sitting on the fence." "What does "perhaps" mean?" "Whatever you'd like it to mean." "Now, what do I do with this?" "I'm going through this one" "Time for Mr. Carrington to unleash his charm offensive." "Why, hello, ladies." "Good morning, sir." "Mr. Carrington, is there anybody here that you are particularly fond of or have a preference for?" "Yeah, there is very much somebody" "I'm specifically very close to and feel an enormous attachment to and that's Miss Hopkins." "As Miss Hopkins' chaperone, it's Lady Devonport's job to keep impoverished playboys at arm's length." "But having experienced the pitfalls of Regency propriety herself, she's in two minds." "And as you know," "I support your interest in her completely." "So next!" "No." "How do you propose to support Miss Hopkins?" "Um, with my massive amounts of charm and talent and no money." "And so modest." "As the chaperones debate the charms of Mr. Carrington," "Mr. Everett soldiers on with his maze, helped by old friend Miss Braund." "And then this one here..." "So what's this rounded one here?" "When Mr. Everett comes in," "I know that he's going to..." "Yeah, I agree." "In fact, either of them are perfectly wonderful." "Morning." "Morning." "Morning, morning." "Do sit down." "Thank you so much." "The first question is, is there a particular lady here that you like?" "I like Miss Hopkins." "And I like them all." "But you feel the warmest affection for Miss Hopkins?" "Yeah." "Well, I think you need to tell us" "Um, it's mattered a great deal, and so when we had our... when we sort of had a bit of a frosty period, it was quite sort of..." "it was quite, you know... it was quite painful, really." "Um, but we've managed to sort of find our friendship again" "Would you be able to keep your friendship with her if she was with someone else, do you think?" "I would think so, yeah." "There's no reason why not." "Yeah, absolutely." "I'm not going to hold grudges or anything." "She's a cracking lass, you know, and if she's... if she wants someone else, then, you know, then I'd go, "hey ho," and just, um, carry on being friends." "And the other day at dinner she was sort of sitting there, she kind of gave me a... gave me a wink across the table and it was like, oh, that sort of..." "giddy schoolkid again." "Sad." "Oh, have it washed and sent round to my tent." "He's absolutely sweet, isn't he?" "I just feel really sorry for him." "He's such a lovely bloke, and he can't have Miss Hopkins, can he?" "Mr. Foxsmith." "Do come and join us." "Sit in the electric chair." "What we're trying to find out here, from everybody, not just you, is if there's somebody here that you really would like us if we possibly can, to sort of push in your direction?" "Well, yes... yourself." "Oh, that's so sweet, but... what can we do?" "It's not practical." "Then... it seems that, uh... um, the conversation is really over." "As I would like to get out of here with my integrity, there's very little else to say." "Are there any of the girls that you think would make your life bearable?" "I wouldn't consider that because I wouldn't do a second best." "All of the ladies here are very attractive in their own right." "There's nothing wrong with any of them." "Well, we can't do anything about it." "And I don't think that would help you, but we can..." "Then, uh... jump over the..." "Then I'll continue my search for somebody who I can get married to and have children." "In the meantime, I'll continue my bachelor monk-like existence." "Thank you very much." "Thank you very much." "I don't know what to say." "Don't say anything." "Just keep it safe." "And you will use it." "Ladies, thank you very much." "Thank you, Mr. Foxsmith." "All right?" "Next." "It's her grandmother's wedding ring for a great number of years while she was happily married, so there's a huge amount of sentiment in this ring." "I think it must be the most precious thing I own." "Oh, there she goes." "All right, Lady D.?" "We're very, very passionate friends and there has been a sexual tension between us." "Practically, we can't go to the next step and so what we've done is we've sort of sacrificed all of that for each other's long-term happiness." "Um, it would otherwise be a May-to-September, doomed-to-failure relationship." "Final preparations for the servants' dinner are underway." "The gentlemen are catching on fast." "Sir, if you do get to serve the soup you have to be quite careful about how much to offer the guests because it can run out." "So if it looks like everybody wants some of the soup, then it's usually just a ladle and a bit." "Like a swan, Everett." "Like a swan?" "Upstairs, the ladies are dressing their maids for dinner." "When serving drinks, is it to the right or the left shoulder?" "Drinks are to the left, food is to the right." "No, failed; drinks are to the right." "But I wanted to give you a tiara." "Don't know if that's quite allowed." "Who's going to have giggles first?" "Everett." "You're all very symmetrical at the moment." "Tonight's soup is asparagus soup." "Zachary." "Seem to have miscalculated somewhat." "Is there any more soup?" "Ah." "I'm afraid cook didn't make enough soup." "Tonight was quite strange, almost seeing them as, like, normal people." "We've always looked up at them and I found it almost quite unbearable and uncomfortable to be served by them and I mean constantly I felt myself, like, wanting to help them." "I'm terribly sorry, Mrs. Mason." "Yes." "Oh, dear." "Perhaps a glass of wine, Mrs. Mason?" "Red or white?" "It was delicious soup." "So, a footman's role is to look impressive and elegant whenever he's on or off duty, sir, and I think you should stand up as straight as possible, sir." "Much better." "spending nine weeks keeping your mouth shut pretty much and just sort of, um, agreeing with what most people say, even though half the time they're talking rubbish" "For one footman, it's payback time." "After eight weeks emptying chamber pots, it's his turn to enjoy a Regency dining facility... something never attempted in mixed company by the gentlemen." "Perhaps this might help, sir." "do it with a certain style and it looks fine." "would you mind removing the chamber pot, please, sir?" "More wine, anyone?" "It's the morning after the servants' party." "Can you let Mrs. Rogers that I shan't be down after dinner?" "Mr. Everett is putting the finishing touches to his maze." "To be honest with you, I know the route through it, so whoever I get chosen to go through it with since I... since I know my way through." "He's ever hopeful that his creation will impress Miss Hopkins and finally bring them together." "There's a couple of girls would be quite nice." "Miss Hopkins, for example, would be quite nice." "But after Mr. Carrington's rose petal gesture," "Miss Hopkins can think of no one else." "nobody's ever, ever done anything like that for me." "He was so completely up for it." "Ladies and gentlemen," "I think a round of applause for Mr. Everett and his construction here." "Well done, well done." "Welcome to my maze." "There are three places where you've got to get to, and they represent, that one to the left, wealth;" "that one over there, children;" "In order to finish the maze, you must have three flowers, one of each color." "Enjoy yourselves." "It's the moment Mr. Everett has been waiting for." "The hostess announces which guests will enter the maze as couples." "So we'll start with our host," "Mr. Gorell Barnes and the countess." "Pleasure." "Then next, Sir Jeremy with Miss Braund." "Then we have... oh, yes, Mr. Carrington with Miss Hopkins." "What a lovely position for a lady to be in and, well, it's not a lovely position, you know, to have kind of two admirers, that I have to choose between the two." "And I am really, really bothered about how Mr. Everett will feel about it." "Do you just go, and you go..." "No, no, no, I'm going to place people." "It's my right." "Miss Hopkins." "Would you like to start through this entrance here?" "This way first." "Thank you." "All right, so..." "This couple could start here." "Everyone, this way, please." "Oh, yes, go across..." "to the left." "How did you manage that?" ""Alas, though my heart is warm and true, no wealth can I command."" "Oh, dear." "It's quite appropriate." "Ah, Miss Hopkins." "What a pleasant surprise." "Have you lost your partner?" "I give you a baby son, an heir to my fortune." "I actually wanted a daughter." "Sup up and let's go." "Sup up." "Ah, it's a really sickly child." "Oh, no, that's quite sad." "Let's have it adopted." "That's a good idea; we'll sell it to the butcher." "The single guests are left to ponder their fate." "Oh, look at the bachelor." "Women had at most five summers to find a husband or face the dismal prospect of spinsterhood." "But one of them, heiress Miss Samuel, remains undaunted." "I swear, coming into the Regency House, I mean, I was thinking," ""Look, at least there've got to be some half-decent-looking guys." "Eye candy... that's all I ask for." "Got some serious flowers happening on every level here." ""And next, no rival must I view." "I scorn divided love."" "It was just horrible." "It was absolutely awful." "You know, I had Mr. Everett, he kept looking at me and shaking his head, and Mr. Carrington who kept arguing with me." "Yeah, but the way to do it I know, is that..." "And all I could do was think," ""Oh, my God, have I made the right decision?"" "And it was just absolutely awful, and when Mr. Everett walked off." "I was a bit surprised that, um, that I wasn't chosen to go through the maze, 'cause again, I was hoping it would be nice if I could have gone with Miss Hopkins." "Got a bit kind of weepy and a bit, uh, you know, just all sort of came crashing in." "and had to sort of go off into the woods and breathe a bit." "It'll be you tomorrow." "The matchmaking is over, the chaperones' job is done." "Well, it's been a triumph for good temper, hasn't it?" "It has, it has, absolutely." "And for organization." "And no more sharing a washbowl." "Let alone a pot, because I mean, really." "It's quite funny that we actually managed that with such kind of dignity." "I'm going to go away from here with the most amazing memories." "I think we all think that." "And it's been nice." "There's a kind of bond between us all to have, you know?" "Yeah, definitely." "Support, Mrs. Rogers." "And you're very warm, even when you're being grumpy." "Ultimately, you've always done it with the best intentions." "I think that says a lot for you as an individual, and that's something I'm going to take back about you, Mrs. Rogers." "No, really, you should be proud of yourself because we have come out of this with the best match for me." "Mmm." "It might not have been the one I wanted in the beginning, but it's definitely the one I want now." "It's the best match for you." "And the only girl to get a man with a title." "Thank you, Mrs. Mason, for putting up with my antics." "You've been incredibly patient and nice." "The party's been a triumph." "No scandal and several matches." "Look after her on the way out." "But the hostess is planning a final coup." "Her first move is to persuade the other chaperones to leave early." "Safe journey." "Thank you very much." "Good-bye." "Time to say good-bye." "Thank you very much for getting me through this." "Thank you for the help." "Everything I've said to you is true." "I'll get my parents to fix you up with somebody." "That'll be grand, thank you." "Come on." "When I said good-bye to Lady Devonport, it was very difficult not to walk up the path." "It was like losing a limb." "She's been my counsel, she's been my best friend, she's been everything to me." "I love Lady Devonport." "Left behind to act as moral guardian to the young ladies," "Mrs. Rogers is hoping to guide her charge into the arms of Mr. Gorell Barnes." "I think one of my main reasons for coming was the kind of idea of stepping into a storybook, and here it is like a storybook every day." "You know, the shutters open on this storybook scene, looking romantic and gorgeous the whole time." "Mr. Gorell Barnes is a very attractive man and he looks fantastic in his Mr. Darcy outfit, I have to say, just walking around, very decorative and elegant." "I always think there will be the perfect person and she's a very smart girl and she's intelligent, and she's been very distant from everything here, and I've been quite distant from people and I think we just..." "get on with each other." "We've got to know each other very well through sitting next to each other at dinner" "And we're still quite playful and we do flirt with each other." "Certain things you think about when you're younger become less important than..." "finding somebody that you actually want to spend the rest of your life with, someone that you get on like a best friend as well as a lover." "And tonight, the hostess has arranged one final bid for romance..." "a masked ball." "Masked balls allowed for a relaxation of the rules." "Unmarried men and women grabbed at the opportunity to indulge in licentious behavior." "If we get the chance to be naughty tonight," "What sort of naughtiness do you mean?" "I don't know." "It could lead anywhere." "As long as the hostess remains in the house, propriety is observed." "But in the interest of her charge, she's keeping a discreet distance." "It's a beautiful setting that we've got tonight, and I think it is that farewell to this strange little Regency magical world." "And I think everyone will think whatever happens tonight doesn't really, you know, matter in a way, or we'll... you know, is part of this strange world" "So I think probably some mischievousness will occur." "Once this is finished, perhaps people might misbehave themselves, yeah." "They all let their hair down and have fun." "In the highly charged atmosphere, emotions run high." "I love Lady Devonport." "I love her so much." "I love every second of her body." "I love every part of her." "And Miss Hopkins' romantic dilemma returns to haunt to her." "I'm just... a sort of plain and average girl, and Mr. Everett has asked me to leave with him and so has Mr. Carrington." "And I've had to make a choice tonight between the two." "And it's broke my heart." "It's the morning after the masked ball." "Today, the guests all leave the Regency house." "The hostess has had a quiet night... unlike some." "Corridor creeping was perhaps inevitable at some house parties, but there was one absolute rule:" "Because the countess and Mr. Gorell Barnes are both so very discreet, you have to watch very carefully." "Mr. Gorell Barnes made a wonderful remark when he first came in here, something on the lines of" ""It would be very easy to fall in love with somebody's mind here."" "I did actually ask him last night whether that had happened, and I think there are indications that there could possibly be romance." "Ah..." "Fantastic." "Thank you very much." "Breakfast, Mr. Gorell Barnes?" "Would you like breakfast for two, sir?" "Hmm." "I'm going back to my room." "Countess." "Mr. Gorell Barnes." "Very pleasant surprise being woken up by a beautiful woman." "Sir." "Better than you, Darren." "I'll just get you some clean clothes, sir." "Safe in the knowledge that society would now have forced the countess and the master down the aisle, the hostess faces a comfortable retirement." "Hip-hip..." "Hooray!" "Hip-hip..." "Hooray!" "Hip-hip... the young guests spend the last few hours in the house" "Go!" "This week has been really hard for me because I've had to kind of..." "lots of choices to make between two really fantastic people, and I wanted to leave with somebody who I knew could carry me through it and who had made the whole experience so special." "Mr. Everett was my choice." "So, it was very difficult." "And here we are, leaving together." "Thank you." "No, thank you." "I'm going to miss your little smiling face at breakfast." "To his surprise, Mr. Carrington leaves empty-handed." "Ah, the hills." "gone to the river." "Right on the tippity-top of that hill." "Is that where we're going to live?" "That's where we're going to open a gift shop." "Do you see a lot of customers up there?" "Rock climbers, picnickers, general touristicos." "Very nice views from up there..." "Very strange... as you walk around now and, I don't know it's just so weird because it's been so full," "and crying and shouting and screaming and now everyone's gone and it just feels..." "But it feels very nice and quiet and calm." "Everyone's gone." "You can hear the clock ticking, you can hear footmen walking on the gravel, you can hear the birds and the wind, and you could never hear that before." "Good bed." "There's been times where it's been really difficult dealing with the most ridiculous situations ever, like a footman coming to me and saying that a lady had come down without her corset, what do I think about that?" "And dealing with rows, which all seem so petty, probably, on the outside, but in this pressure cooker these are such big issues." "But, yeah, and I think I've, uh... yeah, I've pulled it off." "Bless you, sir." "Good-bye, Rob." "Keeping Foxsmith's jacket on occasionally." "Occasionally, sir." "Tom... cheers." "Well done for looking after Mr. Everett so well." "Darren, my faithful valet." "Well done, mate." "Thank you, everyone." "This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from:"