"Age?" "17." "Height?" "5'6"." "Weight?" "125, I think." "What?" "125." "João... do you normally shiver, feel irritable, a lump in the throat or an urge to throw up?" "Do you often worry about wars," "about earthquakes?" "No, I'm not," "Do you like to arrive early at parties?" "Do you do things over and over?" "Yeah." "You must learn to relax." "Very good." "Welcome, João." "GOOD LUCK" "You'll make his bed even here?" "If I don't, he won't do it right." "These sheets are good." "I bought them when João was little and it's never ripped." "There's no light here." "This is wrong, you have to complain about it." "We pay a lot of money, he can't be in the dark." "This bed is good, better than mine." "Ours is old." "We need fresh air here." " Let me organize his closet." " No, let's go." "It's not that bad." "There's a view." "I have to go, Ana." "Sertraline hydrochloride is used for treating depression symptoms, including depression followed by anxiety symptoms, in patients with or without a history of mania," "Treatment of posttraumatic stress disorder, and treatment of social phobia," "Social anxiety disorder," "Hi!" "What are you?" "What do you mean?" "Junkie, schizophrenic..." "Junkie." "Lucky you." "What is your drug of choice?" " Anxiety pills." " Which one?" "Frontal." "Frontal is nice, it's great with vodka!" "I prefer Rivotril." " Have you tried it?" " No." " So you just pop pills?" " Yes." "I've taken everything:" "Hipofagin, Fluxerin..." "All types of anxiety drugs." "Say it, Valium, Lexotan, Lorax, pot, cocaine, ecstasy, acid, MDMA, EPK..." "Really?" " And now?" " Now I'm going to die." "Why?" "Do you need more?" "Are you sick?" "HIV positive, hepatitis C, my liver can't take the cocktail anymore, or any other drug." "For a while, no one knew if viruses were a living thing." "They thought it was a crystal." "Living organisms, no matter how lame, how ridiculous, bacteria or fungi, are capable of reproducing, but not a virus." "A virus needs DNA from another living being." "It's an alien, an invader;" "it probably came to our planet in a meteorite." "A virus doesn't know I exist;" "I'm just its food." "That's why I'm going to die." "How long do you have?" "I don't know." "What about you?" "I don't know." "Do you want some?" " What's this?" " Diazefest." "What's that?" "Diazepam that dissolves under your tongue." "Do you want some?" " How did you get it?" " From Marcos." "Who?" "The male nurse." "Why did he get you this?" "We have an agreement." "But he didn't bring the Port wine and the joint." "There's nothing like Diazepam with pot and Port wine." "5 PM," "We have to go back in." "I can get you some Frontal." "Really?" "How?" "It doesn't matter." "I just can." "Come inside." "I want some Frontal." "Frontal?" "What's this now?" "I like trying new things." "Frontal is not for you." "It will do nothing." "It's not for me." " I don't want any trouble." " Yes..." " I don't want trouble." " Yes, you do." "You love it." "I'll see what I can do." "You won't regret it." "Cream cheese," "Ricotta," "Parmesan," "What is it?" ""To Each, His Own Cheese."" "I borrowed it from the library." "The author compares people's personality to different types of cheese." "There are cheddar, mozzarella and provolone people." " It's a bestseller." " I see." "If I compared people to cheese, and said that life is a cheese," "I bet they'd change my medication." "This guy wrote this book." "He gives lectures." "People love it." "I love this place." "What a beautiful day, look at that!" "Pure air, peace." "The silence..." "Listen!" "And a pharmacy full of drugs!" "Hey!" "It's my family." "Over there, in the red skirt." "We always run out of white paint first." "Thanks, Grandma." "They raised the tuition again, can you believe it?" "Really?" "Really." "I don't know for how long I'll be able to afford it." "I just want to make sure you're ok." "You're so beautiful!" "You've always been." " Just like your mom." " I don't look like her." "Your mouth... your eyes..." "The way I am, maybe." "That's for sure!" "But with all the trouble I've caused in life..." "Look what I've found, look at that!" "Here, sweetie." "You loved this dog." "You loved him." "What was his name?" "His name was Dog." " Don't you want to keep this?" " No." "I have to go." "You're not staying for the appointment?" "I can't today." "You can't?" "Or you won't?" "I know I've failed you." "I've failed your mother, too." "Your mother has failed you." "I've always done everything for you." "I've sacrificed myself for you." "I still do, a lot." "I've heard about your behaved." "You hung your underwear out the window." "This is not a prison." "It isn't?" "How do you know?" "At least he washes them here." "But he shouldn't." "We spend 120 reais a month on laundry." "They didn't bring me my clothes, and I ran out of underwear." "Why didn't you talk to the supervisor?" " It's too expensive." " Enough!" "Am I lying?" "I was shocked when I saw the bill." "A chocolate here costs 8 reais." "It's outrageous." "Isn't it time for the appointment?" "I don't know." "You don't know?" "You should." "I just want my son back, the way he used to be." "João... did you hear what your dad say?" "This is very important." "You must tell them what's going on." "It's the best way to help you." "I've lost hope." "He'll have to leave and fix his life." "I'm only his mother." "I can't undo it." "The therapy is more for the parents than for us." "The parents come here, cry a little bit, hold hands with parents worse than they are, and feel better, thinking they did something for us." "Hey!" "It's too late!" "Nice!" "Sweetie, here it is." "Who's next, who's next?" "Here." "We're not getting enough champagne here." "Can you check on that?" "This is mine." "No, this is mine." "Can you bring me another one?" "Thanks." "Here." "Tell me something you haven't told anyone." " What for?" " To bring you luck." "The first time always brings you luck." "I become invisible, sometimes." "I've become invisible too." "Did anyone see you?" "I mean, were you alone?" "I was meditating, controlling my mind." "Samyama..." " What's yummy?" " Samyama, yoga." "You do yoga and take drugs." "Enough!" "I think that's my problem." "My body and my mind never got along too well." "What did you do to become invisible?" "I took Frontal with Fanta." " Grape or orange?" " Orange." "In the beginning, at first, I did n't know how it worked," "Maybe I did n't become invisible at all because every one seemed invisible," "Beto, stop this noise." "Please, not now!" "Stop it!" "And there's practically no one on the street," "When there is, people look straight ahead," "If y ou look at someone and they look back, it's a contact, and no one wants that," "My mom sees everything but pays attention to nothing, and my dad, forget," "My brother and his girlfriend only looked at each other," "They would n't see me, even if I were visible," "Being invisible is not bad," "You can hear girls talking," " So, did you do it?" " Yes." "We almost went all the way." "You didn't act like the "good girl", did you?" "Of course not." "It just didn't fit." " No way!" " I swear!" " Too big?" " Do you know your blue remote?" "Stop it!" "The TV remote, I swear!" "You can come really close, as long as y ou don't touch," "What the?" "What's your problem, kid?" "I only found this out afterwards, too late," "Then I found out that I could be invisible for some and not for others," "Hey, kid!" "What's your problem?" "With my brother I still had some type of contact," "With my mom, I did n't need Frontal;" "Fanta was enough," "So it's normal for a teenager to like to do the ironing?" "Yeah..." "No, in his room." "He takes the board to his room and irons for hours." "Yes." "I don't know, I'm not doing anything." "I know what pot smells like." "Hold on." "I'm running out of battery." "Wait, hold on just a minute." "Damn!" "I want to sleep, I have to sleep for 12 hours in a row." "I haven't slept since Wednesday." "No, I'm going to take another Frontal." "Yes." "If you need anything, text me." "Alright." "Bye." "Have y ou tried it with grape?" "No." "I was afraid it would have the opposite effect." " It always works with orange." " Yes." "I mean, it didn't work once, because I had one tablet with two Fantas." "So the part of my brain that controls invisibility jammed, and I was invisible for a long time." "When were you back to normal?" "When I licked a girl." "You licked a girl?" "What are you doing?" "Are you crazy, kid?" "Help!" "There's a lunatic here!" "Get out of here!" "Stay away from me!" "Help!" " What happened?" " This boy licked me." "Why does saliva turn off invisibility?" "Saliva is part of your body, but it's not your body." "In a comic book or a cartoon, when someone becomes invisible, their clothes become invisible too." "But if the invisible person spits, you can see the spit on the floor." "Is there a movie where it happens?" "I've never seen it." "Maybe there is." "Ouch!" "It hurts." "A punch also helps invisibility to go away." "I prefer a lick." "Me too, but it depends, You can't lick some people," "I'm going to kill this guy!" "I'm going to kill him!" "Mom, where is my cookie?" "Get out, Luiza." "Come, Mom!" "Go away!" "You're around me all the time." " Come, Mom!" " You stick like a tick." "No, I can't get into my house anymore." "I don't believe it, Luiza!" "Look at me!" "Stop driving me crazy." "Stop it!" "What's going on?" "Mom!" " What's going on, mom?" " Damn!" "Come here, sweetie!" "What was that?" "Are you crazy?" "Help!" " He's crazy." " I'm sorry." "He hurt me." "He's sick." "We'll commit you." "Are you happy now?" " Were you?" " What?" "Happy?" "No." "Are you happy now?" "I don't think so." " Let's go outside for a smoke." " I don't smoke." "How about coming with me without smoking?" "Alright." "Sure." "Does anyone love you?" "I think my family does." "They love me, but they don't like how I am." "What about you?" "No, no one." "I could love you." "Really?" "I think so." " Why?" " I don't know." " You're a quale." " What?" "When you know what something is like but can't explain." "The smell of coffee, the taste of chocolate..." ""Quale" is the name of a kind of cheese." "That's "quark"." "Is the taste of quark cheese a "quale"?" "You're so silly!" "Do you want to love me?" "Yes, I do." "There are different kinds of love." "Which one do you want?" "I know what you're thinking." "So you can also read people's mind?" "You think I only want to have sex with you." "Why "only"?" "Sex is a great type of love." "There's something else I've never told anyone." "That you've never had sex." "I can read people's mind too." "Johnny!" "Johnny!" "Go!" "Go!" "Go!" "Lorena!" "Lorena!" "Lorena!" "Lorena, please!" "They're giving me the wrong medication." "I normally take a blue pill and they gave me a red one." "I see." "The medication can change colors." "No, listen." "It's my clothes." "I'm not into nudism, but they're making me do it because it takes a week to get my underwear back." "This is a laundry problem." "This is not a hotel." "Lorena, look at me." "Come here." "I'd like to report something." "Please, sit." "First, you look beautiful!" "Tell your mom to send you plain clothes to you." "Thank you, you're great." "You sure can listen." "This is a clinic, not a fashion show." "Really?" "I hadn't noticed." "João, you scared me!" "Who is José?" "That guy over there." ""José S. Is apparently healthy."" "He was a child actor and is depressed because he wasn't successful." "It's complicated, it's not easy." ""Medication Aldol." "Apparently healthy."" " Jocemara." " Who?" "Over there." ""Jocemara M.R. Began to use alcohol with codeine 3 years before her first admission."" "What is codeine?" "That alkaline substance in batteries." "It makes you full of energy." " "Patient Julio."" " Julio is the black guy." "There's a quota for blacks, so they must have a black guy." ""Julio L., whose mother is schizophrenic, has used heroine and alcohol for 3 years."" "His mother is actually a drug dealer." "Don't go near him." "Watch your wallet." "You better be careful." "Laura." "That smoker over there." "Do you see her?" "She looks sleepy." "But she's a witch." "The Ouija board." ""Patient Laura C.S. Used crack for 11 months."" "Judite." "She's so hot!" "My best friend here." "I think we were siblings in a previous life." "Do you believe in spiritism?" ""Patient Judite T. Has been using ecstasy regularly for two years and cocaine..."" "I don't like her double phase hair." ""6 months before admission she used LSD..."" ""One day before admission she began with paranoid ideas and hyperactivity."" "Hi, I love you!" ""The use of Hipofagin with alcohol led to delusion, hallucination and aggressive behavior towards her grandmother." "She is HIV positive and because of liver complications, she no longer can use the proper medication."" "Madness has nothing to do with what you say or think." "It's about paying your bills, cleaning up your mess." "If you clean up your mess and pay your bills, you can be as crazy as you want." "But if you have money, you can pay someone to clean up after you." "And with more money, you can think and say anything, and people won't say a word." "While I didn't need anyone's money and cleaned up after myself, no one said I was crazy." "Her grandma is a drug dealer!" "The drug dealer!" "Drug dealer!" "There's Roupinol," "Diazepam and one quarter of Neosaldina." "Cheers!" "1, 2, 3!" " What's that?" " Take it, it's great!" "1, 2, 3!" "João, come!" "Come, João!" "Saint Blaise!" "Saint Blaise!" "In my mouth." " In your mouth." " Yes, in my mouth." "I really love this place!" "Look at nature here." "This is magical!" "I don't ever want to get out of here." " Felipe, you're crazy." " No, I'm not." "I'm an artist." "A crazy artist isn't crazy:" "He's an artist." "Dance!" "Dance!" "Hey, don't touch it!" "The mind is never happy with the way it works." "That's the problem of a thinking machine, it thinks about itself, and wants to work differently." "The mind never stops." "And the body can't handle it." "The body is the problem." "The body." "I like the body." "Yours?" "It's cute." "I like yours better." "You have good taste." "Do you have a condom?" "No." "That's too bad." "I can get it." "We don't have medicine here anymore." "The administration now requires copies of the prescription." "We have to file it..." "I don't want medication;" "I want a condom." "Really?" "What's in it for me?" "Money." "How much?" "I have 20 reais." "That's not much." "That's all I have." " What about your iPod?" " Are you serious?" "You don't think it's worth it?" "I got it." "When is your therapy?" "After lunch." "Can you skip it?" "I'll try." "I'll leave the key there, go to the laundry, go in, lock the door and wait for me." "Are you sure?" "It smells awful in there." " Do you have a better idea?" " No." "I'll leave the key here, take it, go to the laundry, lock the door and wait for me." "I'll knock 6 times, like this..." " Then you open." " And you go in." "Of course." "Then we lock the door and then..." "We'll see it later." "If the key isn't there it's because I couldn't get it." "If it is, and I don't show up it's because I couldn't get out." "And what should I do with the key?" "If I don't show up, just leave the key there." "Or keep it and give it to me later." " Won't they miss the key?" " Sure, there's only one." " And so..." " So..." "We'll figure it out later." "Alright, we'll figure it out later." " Excuse me." " Hi, João." "Come in." "What's wrong with you?" "I'm not feeling too well." "I threw up this morning." "I can't eat." "I have diarrhea..." "What else are you feeling?" "My body hurts." "My arms and my legs hurt." "And when I look to the side, my eyes hurt." "You should rest and..." "It's probably the flu." "I have therapy today." "We'll reschedule it." "Really?" "Thanks." "I can't go to therapy today." "I have to rest." "I can't eat anything." "Ouch!" " What is it?" " I cut myself." "Lime is a great disinfectant." "What's this for?" "It's a secret." "What is essential is invisible to the eye." " Buddha." " "The Little Prince."" "See you later." "I know exactly what y ou're thinking about," "No, y ou don't," "If I did n't, y ou would n't be talking to me," "Who said I'm talking to y ou?" "Aren't y ou?" "No, I'm not," "Yes, y ou are," "But I know exactly what y ou're thinking about," "No, y ou don't," "We started over," "So it's the end," "Of what?" "The conversation," "You said there was no conversation, just thoughts," "So it's the end of the thoughts," "How so?" "What?" "The end of the thoughts?" "The end, no thinking, thinking of nothing," "There's only one way," "Which way?" "Dying," "I know another one," "Someone who could love me, who knew how I was, who looked into my ey es," "who could give me pleasure and to whom I could give pleasure," "And all those people were the same person," "When I went inside her, I was born," "Why does your guitar have no strings?" "I could kill myself with them." "Why didn't you leave it in the storage?" " I like to look at it." " I'd like to hear you play." "I can't." "Yes, you can." "Can I?" "Wow!" "I've always dreamed of having this guitar." "How come you never did?" "Do you know how much it costs?" "About 4,000 reais." "Take it." "Did you forget we're invisible?" "No, it's not right." "But I'm taking these strings for my guitar." "Shall we go in?" "Are you sure you want to do this?" "Yes, I am." "Now you've been introduced to my family." "Invisible." "Let's go." "João, what do you think of what you did?" "What I think?" "I think it's great!" "It was the best day of my life." "Do you think that running away was good for you?" "Yes, I do." "Sometimes living is good, Lorena." "Running away..." "Without facing the problem that brought you here." "I'm in love." "The only thing I know is that you made your stay here longer." "That's good." "I wear sunglasses" "To make my tears run" "And when y ou're next to me" "The tears begin to run" "I feel that thing in my chest" "I feel that big mess" "I know I'm a vampire" "And I'll never have peace in my heart" "I wish I could play the guitar." "I tried but my fingers can't play a barre chord." "You can play many songs without it." "Like what?" "Like this one, but instead of doing the F here, you do it here." " And the G goes here." " I can't, it's hard." " Try." " Believe me, I can't." " My fingers don't obey me." " Let's see." " Here?" " Right." "Now move up." "That's it." "I wear sunglasses" "To hide my tears" "That's it." " It sounds awful." " No, it sounds great!" "And when y ou're next to me" "The tears begin to run" "I feel that thing in my chest" "You play." "Then sing with me." "I feel that thing in my chest" "I feel that big mess" "I know I'm a vampire" "And I'll never have peace in my heart" "Sometimes I wonder" "Why I do things this way" "And the summer night is going away" "With y our crazy smell of jasmine" "And I get intoxicated with y ou" "I get intoxicated with passion" "In my body blood doesn't run" "J ust fire and volcano lava" "We have the power, João." "Men do." "You are a woman." " Men as in human." " Men as in human." "To me, the dog takes second place." "The horse and the cow are tied in third." " And fifth, the cat." " Fourth." "Fifth, there's the horse and the cow tied in third." " You lost me." " First, the man." "Second, the dog;" "third, the horse and the cow;" "and fifth, the cat." "I got it." "And then?" "Then the mammals in general, and then the fish and birds also tied." "The reptiles, amphibians, insects, those bugs we don't know their names, bacteria, fungi, and then the virus, which is not exactly an animal." "And where am I?" "You?" "You are between a dog and a man." "I'm in a good place." "To me, you come first." "Then, woman, then man." "Then, the minerals, the plants..." "The brain works in different states." "The first state is Kshipta." "It has a lot of energy and movement." "It thinks a lot, moves around a lot, gets irritated a lot." "You can't pay attention to things, and when y ou concentrate it's for the wrong reason, jealousy, envy," "The second state is M ud ha," "Mudha." "You don't like to think much, you think of trivial things, such as money." "You just want to eat and sleep." "You want physical pleasure..." "Drugs..." "The third stage is vikshepa," "The vikshepa state alternates a lot of movement with a lot of calm," "The fourth stage is Ekagra." "When y ou think of one thing at a time, your mind understands." "You begin to control your thoughts." "And the fifth state is Niruddha, where your mind waves stop." "You understand the silence." "You forget about yourself." "And become invisible." "Maybe, but that's not what matters." "What matters is to have control over yourself." "Wow!" "You know everything about Yoga." " I don't know anything." " Yes, you do." "If I had learned it before I clogged my cells with nicotine, alcohol, sugar..." "You learned it really well." "That's what Samyama is." " Ah, now I get it." " Samyama is the 5 states." " Let's go to my room." " What about the girl?" "She took a giant dose of Amplictil." "She won't wake up until tomorrow." "Do you have a condom?" "Yes, I do." "I'm coming." "We could have a baby," "Maybe someday," "Maybe today?" "Are you crazy?" "Do you want to die?" "I don't care." "You're stupid." "I hope you're luckier than I was." "I love playing with dirt." "It's therapeutic." "I love watching you." "Stop it." "It's true." "You're also therapeutic." "No, I'm not." " Yes, you are." " No, I'm not." "Yes, you are." " No." " Yes." "No!" "I think so." "I'm glad you're leaving soon." "How much longer?" "2 weeks." "I've made up my mind." "I'm not leaving." "What do you mean?" "I'm not leaving." "I want to stay." "Are you crazy?" "If I want to stay, I'm crazy." "If I'm crazy, then I should stay." "It's all wrong." "Being crazy here means pain, suffering, disease." "You have to study, work and live." " Don't waste your time here." " I'm not wasting my time." "On the contrary." "Finding you here was a coincidence." "Why?" "Here, everyone is like you and me." "You and I are very different." "And also very much alike." "We both need medication, drugs, anti-monotony poison." "It works." "The problem is that those who use poison normally die." "People die anyway." "Yes, but some are in a hurry." "They don't want to wait, and want to go away soon." "I'm in no hurry to leave." "I'm talking about this planet." "What's the joke?" "Do you think you're funny?" " Marcos..." " I'm not talking to you." "Get up." "Get up." " Come here." " Hold on." "Let me go." "You're hurting me." "I don't expect anything from you." "I just want to marry you, have kids, and live with you until death do us part." "João." "You're a silly boy." "That's why you like me." "Let's go to the laundry room today." "Today?" "Can you get the key?" "Yes, I can." "Same time?" "No." "4 PM." "I'll leave the key at the same place." "It's hard without prescription because," "Darling, I need this medicine, Cebrilin," "I need it," "Is it serious?" "V ery serious," "I have this prescription, but I can't take it," "You can read it here." "It can't be taken by patients treated with oral anticoagulants." "I brought the prescription of the anticoagulant to make my blood thinner." "I can only take Cebrilin." "Now, Cebrilin..." "I can't get it until Monday." "I can't sell it without a prescription." "It's a controlled substance." "I can't stay awake until Monday." "If I take this medication I can have thrombosis, internal bleeding;" "I might even die." "Please, forgive me, but the law is strict." "Don't make me laugh." "The law is strict?" "On medication for old and poor people?" "With all the corruption going on, you talk about strict laws?" "With this pharmaceutical industry making up the avian flu, the swine flu, the A, B, C, D, E, F flu just to sell medication?" "You know it." "Alright." "You don't have to sell it." "There are many drugstores in this country, more drugstores than evangelical churches." "It's a sick country, with a sick body and sick soul." "Mrs. Celia." "How do you know I live here?" "I'm a friend of your granddaughter's." "A friend of my granddaughter's?" "You work at the drugstore." "What do you want?" "I just want to talk to you." "I'm a friend of Judite's." "Was this brunette her mother?" "Yes." "Do you have rolling paper?" "No, I don't." "What happened to her?" "She died before I did." "She was pretty." "She was very pretty." "She had a quick stay here." "How old was Judite when her mother died?" "13." " And her father?" " She never had one." "But it is very common." "She didn't come out from inside him." "A mother is a mother." "The father, who knows?" " Do you want some?" " No, thanks." "She won a painting prize at school." "She made a beautiful painting." "Where is it?" "The painting?" "It's gone." "She traded everything for drugs." "It's so sad." "She traded her clothes, the stereo I gave her." "It's really sad." "Drug addiction is a calamity." "It's a horrible disease." "At least pot is cheap." "Did you throw away her diary?" " Did she show you?" " Yes, she did." "No, I didn't." "She used to draw really well, didn't she?" "I'll get it so we can see it." "The mind wants to be God, the body reminds us that we are animals," "My mind told me to obey my body," "I did, My body was happy, and lived for a long time, lived quickly, traveled, and my mind followed," "J udite was ready to leave when the dog showed up, silly and pretty, born like that," "She thought he was invisible but he wasn't," "The dog had just arrived, no rush, no place to go," "J udite could n't leave the dog there, so she stay ed," "The dog looked at her as if waiting for an answer, waiting for a seed to turn into a tree and yield flowers and fruit," "Here, have some tea, son." "Thank you very much." "Be careful, lime burns in the sun." "J udite really had to go, She could no longer postpone it," "She knew the dog would follow her everywhere," "He belonged wherever she went," "J udite could n't and did n't want to take the dog," "She had to make him go," "She did that because she loves him," "He'll suffer a little and grow," "If he comes with me, he'll never grow," "I'm going away and y ou can't come with me," "Why not?" "Dogs are not allowed where I'm going," "Do y ou want to go?" "No," "I have to go," "I love y ou, Dog," "João..." "I'm here." "I'm going to die." " No, you're not." " Yes, I am." "It's today." "Right now." "I'm going to die in a little while." "I don't want you to die." "I know." "But you have to stay alive." "What for?" "To remember me." "Promise me you'll stay alive." "Promise me." "I promise you." "How many people have you seen dying?" "None." "Am I going to be your first?" "Yes." "Good luck." "Judite..." "Judite..." "My love..." "My love..." "They changed my medication," "Then I remembered she asked me to stay alive to remember her," "So I decided to stop the medication." "I never took anything again." "I was in the clinic for 3 months and left," "I went back to school and grad uated," "I got married, had a daughter and got divorced," "After a long time I got tested," "I'm not Hlv positive," "I was lucky,"