"* She blew the heat Right off my face *" "* And ushered in a cold front *" "* She chilled me Right down to the bone *" "CHARLIE:" "Lose the jacket." "It's not high school anymore." "Thanks for knocking." "I did." "Oh." "Where'd this thing come from?" "Claud and Julia." "Gift-wrapped and everything." "Cute." "Yeah." "Kirsten got me a set of highlighter pens." "Sarah got me a thesaurus." "Underlined all the different words for boyfriend." "Everybody's making this big fuss, you know." "It's really no big deal." "Actually, you're wrong about that." "First days are always a big deal." "Uh-oh, look out." "You're not gonna tell that story again about when I started kindergarten." "You mean how you barfed on your Buster Browns when you forgot the alphabet?" "[LAUGHS]" "Nah, it would be mean to remind you about that." "I remember Mom gave me this whole speech that day at the bus stop." "She said, "You know, you don't have to go, Bailey." "If you're scared, you don't have to go to school."" "A total lie, needless to say." "But it worked." "Yeah, of course it worked." "I'm like, "Oh, no." "I want to."" "I wonder what they'd say now?" "Probably what they told me when I started college." "Big chance, clean slate, up to you what you make of it, that sort of thing." "Yeah, well... that's easier said than done." "I mean, let's face it," "I'm not exactly the brightest bulb on the marquee." "Who says?" "Anyone who's ever met me." "I mean, hello." "Okay." "How about this?" "Nobody who's ever met you is gonna be there." "You know what, Char?" "I think you might actually be getting the hang of this pep-talk stuff." "[CHUCKLES]" "Get some sleep." "[SIGHS]" "[THE BODEANS' "CLOSER TO FIVE" PLAYING]" "* Everybody wants to live *" "* Like they wanna live *" "* And everybody wants to love *" "* Like they wanna love *" "* Everybody wants to be *" "* Closer to free-ee-ee-ee *" "* Closer to free *" "And above all, senior year is a time to be meticulous, organized." "Don't let things fall between the cracks, because statistically... statistically... statistically..." "I know I have this here somewhere." "Just one second." "[GIGGLING]" "Turn around." "A lot of you will get into the college of your choice, if you have the grades." "[WHISPERS] He looks really good." "Is that good or bad?" "Mm, I don't know." "The Garber Award, for example." "When are those essays due?" "But you know what?" "I'm not gonna spend the next 10 months ducking into stairwells to avoid him." "Oh, my God, you did that?" "Mm-hm." "It was exhausting." "Yes, by the end of this week." "[BELL RINGS]" "And don't forget to sign up for your individual appointments." "Okay?" "Dismissed." "Want me to schedule us together?" "Yeah, that'd be great." "Thanks." "See you." "Hey." "Hey." "So how was England?" "When'd you get back?" "Last week." "It was fun." "Just me, my mom, my dad, Ben." "Ben?" "Ben." "Justin, she had the baby?" "Oh, wow!" "He's cute as hell." "Oh, can I see them?" "Yeah." "My mom would love that." "Um, I'll call first so you don't have to be there, you know, if you don't want to." "Julia, let's not do this whole avoiding thing." "I mean, last spring was enough, don't you think?" "All this time apart and we still think alike." "Dr. Kass, hi." "[BOTH LAUGH]" "Oh, Kirsten, I appreciate you coming in." "I know." "I know." "I've pretty much fallen off the face of the earth." "You warned me the beginning of the semester would be crazy time." "Not that I'm complaining." "It's" " It's going great." "I'm glad to hear it." "Listen-- [LAUGHS] Oh, you're gonna love this." "There's this girl in my early childhood section, Penny somebody." "Every morning she comes in and does her makeup while I'm lecturing." "Blusher, lip pencil, that" " That eyelash grabber." "I'm sorry." "I'm babbling." "And you probably have, like, 50 other things to do." "So..." "That looks familiar." "Does it have anything to do with why you called me in?" "You got the grant for the textbook?" "Actually, Kirsten, um, one of our visiting fellows was reading your dissertation." "I gave it to him as a matter of fact for a course he's teaching." "And he came to me with a concern." "I don't know how to put this." "[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]" "Larry." "Excuse me, excuse me." "Larry." "Larry." "Larry." "How you doing?" "You look great." "Hey, excuse me." "Let me just" " Sorry." "Just, like, I'll come through here." "Hey, I haven't seen you since, you know..." "Right." "Right, right, right." "Since, uh, since your suspension hearing." "[CHUCKLES]" "Man, they were" " They were really hard on you, pal." "Yeah, well, you know, I just-- I've been meaning to thank you for all the nice and kind things you said." "Sure." "Right." "[BOTH LAUGH]" "Hey, Cooper Voight." "Bailey Salinger." "How you doing?" "I'm good." "It's just these lines, they're kind of, you know, thanks." "So are you, uh, taking anything interesting?" "I don't know." "Ellerby for Precalculus." "Uh, ixnay." "My brother Frank, he's a junior here, and Ellerby's on his I'd-rather-chew-glass list." "So forget that one." "Anything else?" "I don't know." "Um, Biology?" "Eh..." "European Novels?" "Intro to Computers?" "[IMITATES BUZZER]" "Listen, take the proficiency test." "Get excused from that class." "There are, like, suicides coming from that class." "Really?" "Yeah." "See, listen, my brother sat me down the other day and he talked to me, and he gave me this great plan:" "how to succeed in college without really trying." "Want to hear it?" "Cost you a beer." "Sure." "Yeah, sure." "Let's hear it." "Cool." "Oh, check it out." "We might actually get registered in this lifetime." "Thanks." "Nope, nope." "I don't think we should." "Oh, come on, why not?" "Because I just don't." "I think it's a bad idea." "We would have done it last year like that." "Yeah, well, I'm not comfortable with it" "Justin, it's a letter of recommendation, not a diary." "Okay." "Okay." "Obviously, you are just scared that mine is so much better than yours." "All right." "Fine." "Here." "Take it." "BOTH:" "Hm." "Pretty much, almost identical." "Diligent." "That's very good." "Astute." "Astute, that's a solid adjective." "All right." "All right." "These are" "They're all right." "What?" "What?" "Nothing." "What, nothing?" "Nothing, really." "All right, Sarah, hand it over." "Come on." "No." "No." "Hey." "You know, a real friend would have let us see her letter." "Hm, all right, let's see here." "La, la, la, la, la." ""Sunny demeanor."" "BOTH:" "Ooh." "Uh, "hard worker..."" "Uh-huh, uh-huh." "Same old" " What?" ""The combination of her winning personality" ""and academic excellence makes Sarah Reeves the most gifted student to come through my class in years."" "Defining moment of my life." "I'm 12 years old, Frank's 15, whatever." "We're at Macy's, the one downtown." "I gotta pee." "So I walk over to the Aramis counter and he sees me." "He goes, "Where are you going?"" "I turn around and I just point to that sign," ""Men's toiletries."" "[SCOFFS]" "Oh, no." "Oh, yeah." "He keels over on the floor, laughing." "They almost call security because he's so loud, and he can't wait to get home to tell my parents." "Of course." "Well, that's it." "That is a Cooper story." "Beat that." "I couldn't." "How come that's always the stuff they remember?" "Bailey, I'm fine with it." "I know my" " What do you call it, limitations?" "I know how to get around them." "Why bang your head up against the wall, right?" "Because it feels so good when you stop?" "No." "It feels better if you don't ever start." "Yeah." "Whoa." "Prices are kind of steep." "I didn't do a meal plan." "Come here." "Take this." "Hang back a second." "Okay?" "Yeah." "Hi..." "Maureen." "Meal card." "Absolutely." "I got it right" "Wait a minute." "Oh, no." "Oh, no." "What kind of dirtbags come to this school?" "Somebody ripped my meal card off." "This is outrageous" "I had it right in this pocket." "All right." "All right." "All right." "Don't bust a gut, okay?" "Just fill out this form and you'll get a new one." "Thank you." "Thanks." "Next." "Thanks." "Thank you." "Thank you." "And when she saw Salinger, well, she wanted to know if it was any relation to you." "Mrs. Levin for Social Studies." "Boy, I haven't thought about her in years." "Butter?" "She always liked me." "Yeah?" "Because when I told her that I was your sister, she kind of had to grab hold of the desk and her face got, like, all pale." "[BOTH CHUCKLE]" "[FOOTSTEPS, DOOR OPENS]" "CHARLIE:" "Kirsten, wait, wait, wait." "Where are you going?" "How was the meeting?" "Was it what you thought?" "I mean, does he want to use your thing?" "Your dissertation, in that textbook?" "No." "Um, I'm gonna go to..." "That's" " That's-- It" " It's a joke." "You're the last person in-- Charlie, it's true." "No." "They're right." "No way." "Uh-uh." "I saw you killing yourself over that thing." "Working until 5:00 in the morning and" " And every weekend?" "That's not plagiarizing." "How can you tell me--?" "Listen to me, Charlie." "I looked at my dissertation." "He showed me." "There was this-- This whole piece." "This" " This chunk of" " Of-- Of this study and I" " And I" " I just..." "I used it." "I didn't say where it came from." "I didn't annotate it." "I didn't attribute it." "I just" " I stole it." "But that has to be a mistake." "I did it." "I did it." "But the funny thing is, I mean, when I saw the letter from Edwards and how good it was" "Good?" "The guy thinks you're the next Einstein." "It was autopilot." "I mean, I headed for your locker like you were gonna be there for me to show you." "Totally dumb." "So?" "So was it weird?" "Was it exciting?" "It was registration." "Yeah, I know, but I was kind of hoping that you'd call me last night to tell me about it." "Yeah, I know." "I know." "I would have, but I wound up getting home late." "I met this guy, Cooper." "He'll be there tonight at the "hello, freshman" thing." "You're gonna come, right?" "Yeah." "Where's your schedule?" "Backpack." "Geology?" "You couldn't get into that bio lab?" "You know, I could have, but I decided to go with rocks for jocks instead." "Cooper says if you've got, like, three brain cells, you're pretty much guaranteed a B." "Survey of Children's Literature?" "Wow, are you interested in that?" "Yeah." "Why not?" "I mean, European Novels?" "What, was I crazy?" "These books are so much easier." "And" " And shorter." "Cooper say that too?" "Well, you know, I'm just" "Look, the time you spent going through that course catalogue," "I mean, you practically had it memorized and none of these" "Come on, Sarah, I've got seven more semesters to kill myself." "I just thought I'd be better off kind of easing in right now, you know?" "Whatever." "[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]" "Hey." "What'd they do to you in there?" "He" " He asked about extracurricular activities for my junior year because" " Because there was this hole in my transcript." "You know what I have?" "For the whole year?" "Hung out with my boyfriend." "Oh, so now it's my fault?" "No, no, no." "I'm just saying" "Because I'm not gonna do any better." "Hey, hey, how'd it go?" "Lousy." "Last year is-- Is completely zip." "I" " I have no student government." "I have no school activity." "We" " You know, I mean, you spent all last year hanging out with my brother." "Well, yeah." "Yeah." "But, you know" " You know," "I" " I did costumes for the school show and" " And student senate, and" " And I ran this musical tutoring thing at the elementary school" "Excuse me." "Can I just mention that you're starting to get on my nerves?" "He's kidding." "I'm kidding." "[CHUCKLES]" "Yeah, I" " I" " I'd better..." "All right." "I wasn't kidding." "Man." "What are we gonna do?" "I mean, any club worth anything already has all their officers and stuff." "I mean, you can't just walk in and become president, and that's what looks good on transcripts." "Justin, what if we--?" "Hang on, hang on." "Come here." "What if we make up our own club, huh?" "Something that sounds good, but where we don't have to actually do anything." "Like" " Like, Future Adults of America." "Yeah." "Or, uh, Students for the Ethical Treatment of Students?" "That's perfect." "I was kidding." "No." "Look, I am serious." "We are competing with Little Miss Gifted, okay?" "We" " We make up this club, and we have some kind of great title." "I can be president and you can be, I don't know, chairman of the board." "And we can go to Mr. Shiffer." "We get accepted, go to the faculty" "Wait, wait, wait, wait." "Stop, stop, stop." "Doesn't this strike you as a little bit unethical?" "That's the irony of it." "Huh?" "Huh?" "Oh, Claudia, um, is Kirsten around?" "I haven't seen her." "What are you looking for?" "She had all those file cards." "Where are they?" "I'm thinking maybe she took notes, right?" "But she" " She got distracted." "Maybe somebody interrupted her and" "And she forgot to write down the, you know, the source." "And then a month or two later, she came back and looked at the card and thought it was..." "[SIGHS]" "I don't know what I'm looking for." "Well, school." "[***]" "Hi." "Hi." "Did I ever tell you about that time that I thought I made up a song?" "No." "Well, it was this one that Julia kept playing, like, over and over." "It had something to do with paradise and parking lots." "And, well, I mean, I must have heard it, like, without even realizing." "But I" " I had, like, no idea." "But then one day it was like, you know," ""Hey, look what I wrote."" "Kirsten?" "Claud, that isn't" "I can't do this with you." "That" " That's it?" "That" " That's the best you can do?" "Kirsten, you" "[DOOR CLOSES]" "You know, no offense, you guys." "But that's insane." "You didn't really think that would work, did you?" "Well, it would have if it wasn't for this one." "The club would be a moral thermometer?" "What the hell does that mean?" "I meant to say barometer." "I got a little nervous." "Give me a break." "Well, great." "No club, no nothing." "Look, I'm sorry." "You know, maybe you can think of something else." "Why do you care?" "You're the most gifted person anybody's ever taught in the entire universe." "Would you stop that?" "What was he yammering about?" ""You don't need extracurricular work if you've got alumni connections."" "Who the hell's got alumni connections?" "Well, uh, me, I guess." "Wait a minute." "You guess?" "My mom went to Stanford." "What?" "My mom went to-- No, I heard you." "Why didn't you tell me?" "I don't know." "It didn't come up." "I don't know where your parents went." "Nowhere good." "Jeez." "Uh, Justin, relax." "Okay?" "You've got the grades, and you are a great writer." "Isn't he a great writer?" "Yeah." "There's a chance you could win the Garber Award." "That always helps." "Right." "Everyone who wins gets in somewhere good." "Sally Dickinson, last year, Princeton." "And that Tom what's-his-face the year before, he" " He got into Stanford." "No connections." "No." "I am not going to win." "I have nothing to write about." "A" " A pivotal event in my life?" "What am I--?" "What are you writing about?" "What's your essay?" "Your, uh" " Your entry?" "Well, uh, meeting my birth mom." "Oh, great." "Fantastic." "They're gonna love that." "They're gonna eat it up with a spoon." "Well, excuse me." "It's not like I made it up so I'd have something to write about." "And don't even tell me." "You're gonna write about your parents." "Well, yeah." "I don't know what that has do with anything." "Man, talk about a ringer." "That is disgusting." "JUSTIN:" "Know what?" "I bet you'll both win." "Yeah, you'll tie." "And you'll both go to Stanford, and I'll be busy over at, uh, Stop  Shop saying, "paper or plastic?"" "Paper or plastic?" "Can I double-bag that for you?" "Paper or plastic?" "Paper or plastic?" "I'd be okay with a tie." "Yeah." "[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS]" "SARAH:" "Oh, my God." "The graffiti in the woman's bathroom is unbelievable." "They've got philosophical debates on the stalls." "I whiz, therefore I am." "Discuss, please." "[BOTH LAUGH]" "Anybody, uh, want a refill?" "Designated driver." "Bailey?" "No." "I can't drink and worry at the same time." "You'll get used to it." "Come on, it's a party." "Can't you be miserable tomorrow?" "Yeah, I will be if we don't get out of here soon." "I've got that computer thing, that proficiency test." "You listened to me." "Oh, that's great." "Well, think of this as half empty." "Come on, 15 more minutes then I'll bodily drag you out." "How's that?" "You know, you don't have to sweat it." "No, see, the thing is, I do." "No, you don't have to." "Look, I wasn't gonna advertise this, but we're friends." "Frank said he'd take the test for me." "I mean, having a pain-in-the-ass older brother ought to be good for something, right?" "And if I bug him enough, he'll do it for you too." "Seriously?" "Yeah." "All you have to do is write down your student ID and he'll log on as you." "You know what?" "That's great, um, and thanks." "But I'm gonna give the test a shot myself." "Okay." "Ten more minutes." "I found this." "You went through my--?" "I didn't know what else to do." "God." "I called the drugstore and asked what this was." "I" " I never heard of it." "This is an antidepressant." "Are you taking these?" "No." "But you did." "It says "refill."" "I didn't want you" "When?" "Kirsten, when were you taking these?" "It was last year, last December... right after the wedding." "Oh." "What can I say?" "The holidays were pretty..." "They were bad." "What did you expect?" "I went to see someone." "Dr. Lido?" "I went to see him for a while, and he gave me those, and I took them for..." "for a couple of months, and" " And then I stopped." "I'm fine, Charlie." "I'm..." "That's when all this stuff happened, isn't it, with your dissertation?" "They kept calling me." ""Where's your dissertation?" "You're late."" "I couldn't get out of bed." "It was like... it was like..." "You know, the fog when it comes in the morning and it just..." "I don't even remember typing those paragraphs." "But I must have." "Why aren't you asleep?" "I was thinking." "And listen" "I'm tired." "No, no, no." "Listen..." "I know" " I know what you have to do." "You have to tell them." "Them who?" "Kass, your advisory committee." "You have to tell them what happened." "They won't care." "Let's just-- Let's just go to sleep." "Sure, they will." "Sure, they'll care." "It's like, yeah, okay, you made a mistake, but you had a very good reason." "You were in trouble." "People understand that." "They'll" " They'll forgive it." "I don't know." "That's because you can't see it." "But I'm looking from the outside." "And here's what it is." "You do not do stuff like that." "I mean, 99.9 percent of your life is one way and then this one time..." "Do you want me to talk to them?" "I will." "I'll go up there." "No, Charlie, no." "Absolutely not." "Okay." "Okay." "So then you will, then?" "I'll go with you and" " And I'll wait outside." "But I'll be there." "Okay?" "We're gonna do this, you and me." "And" " And we'll get through it." "I mean it." "I love you." "And I promise you-- All right." "[SIGHS] All right." "Julia, are you any good at computer programming?" "No." "I suck at it." "Julia." "Sorry." "I stink at it." "Owen, you want to paste some of this stuff on yourself?" "Come on, it's fun." "No." "I want to watch TV." "He's in like pre-pre-preschool." "Why does he have homework?" "I thought Kirsten was supposed to help with this." "Right, Claud." "She doesn't have anything else to worry about." "[SIGHS] Wow, poor Kirsten." "It's kind of a dumb thing to do." "Mm, I don't know." "I keep thinking she must have had a reason." "Yeah?" "Like what?" "Thurber ate my Ph.D.?" "God, this glue is so gross." "Come on, I can-- I can imagine it." "Can't you?" "You're under" " You're under all this pressure, and the clock's ticking and you have to deliver or you're screwed." "So you get an extension." "You go to your adviser and you say, "Hey, I'm stuck."" "You just don't rip off someone else's stuff." "Hey, Owen, get back here." "Oh, forget it." "What about her students?" "I mean, they must probably think she's so smart and love her and look up to her." "Now how are they gonna go to her with a problem or--?" "Or just to talk?" "I mean, if they can't even trust her anymore." "That's who I feel bad for, it's them." "Hey." "Oh, um..." "I know you're mad at her, but" " But don't be." "Why not?" "Look, if you need to be mad at somebody about this, then it's me, okay?" "Be mad at me." "That doesn't make any sense." "I know." "I know." "I'm sorry." "Hey, you talking to me?" "Uh, sure." "Why not?" "I, uh..." "Look, I wigged out a little bit yesterday and, uh," "I already apologized to Sarah." "So I'm sorry." "Well, forget about it." "I have." "What's this?" "Oh, my essay." "One last proofing." "Hey, Justin." "Hi, Ruthie." "She's just a friend." "That's okay." "So am I." "[GIGGLES] A friend who's seen you naked." "[BOTH LAUGH]" "Yeah, there's that." "Yeah." "Do you want me to take a look at it?" "Do you want to?" "Do you want me to?" "[LAUGHS]" "I just" " I don't want you to feel obligated or anything." "I don't." "You sure?" "Because it's, you know, one of those last year/this year things." "I mean, last year I would've asked you in a second." "No, this is a complete and total act of free will." "Give it to me." "Want to give me yours?" "Uh" " Uh, it's-- It's not quite cooked yet." "Once it's done, I'll..." "[COMPUTER BEEPING]" "[SIGHS]" "Excuse me." "I need to, um" " I need to invalidate this" " This test." "How do I do that?" "[TYPES]" "Hi, Julia." "Hi." "Is that your entry for the Garber Award?" "Yes." "Add it to the pile." "A lot of you going up for it this year." "More than ever." "Oh, just my luck." "You know, you'd think I'd be adept at this by now." "Excuse me." "JUSTIN:" "I was in my room when the phone rang." "I don't know why, but I had a feeling it was bad news." "We were always careful, so this couldn't be happening, exceptit was." "And it suddenly hit me, this is going to change everything." "I always thought the worst thing your girlfriend could say toyou would be, "I met someone else,"" "or, "I don't love you anymore." But they're not." "Far and away, the one thing that makes the blood rush to your feet, the one that stops the clock is "I'm pregnant."" "[BELL RINGS]" "So it's in." "And it's not bad." "It's not bad." "It's actually pretty good." "But I have to stop thinking about it for the next month." "You know, that's when they let you know who won, in a month." "Do you think you could win?" "Oh, I can't think about it anymore." "So as of right now, I'm not thinking about it." "Maybe." "Wow." "Wow, you've been busy." "Oh, these are" " These are used." "Oh." "So, um, you do anything interesting today?" "Any interesting tests, maybe?" "Anything on... computers?" "Am I getting warm?" "I couldn't finish it." "Oh, okay." "So you'll take it again." "You decided to take the class?" "I didn't register for it." "And" " And it's probably full, so..." "You have to take one or the other." "Either, you know, the class or the test." "You're not" " You're not gonna let his brother" "Bailey." "Sarah, I have zero aptitude for this stuff." "It'd take me, like, 50 hours a week just to keep up, and I would flunk the class anyway, and it would screw everything else up." "God, why are you underestimating yourself?" "Thinking you're already gonna fail, taking gut courses?" "I'm being realistic." "I'd fail it and-- And I can't do that." "I want to do okay." "You know, I want to-- I want to do well." "Maybe even" " Maybe even rack up a couple of A's this semester." "Yeah, I know, imagine that, me getting A's." "Yeah." "You could if you wanted to, you know, if you work." "But" " But not by taking rocket science or" " Or some killer computer class." "You know, when you showed me that letter of recommendation you got?" "You were" " You were nuts." "You were so excited." "Well, I want to know what that's like." "So I'm" " I'm" "I'm gonna let Coop's brother take that test for me, just get it over with." "And then" " Then really-- It's cheating." "Once." "One time." "Yeah." "And the next time?" "You know, because-- because there's gonna be a next time when there's a hard test or a paper that you can't finish and somebody or his brother offers you an easy way out, what's gonna stop you?" "[***]" "We had no other choice." "What could we do?" "Very, very unfortunate situation." "It's over." "And?" "It's over." "They're revoking my Ph.D." "No, no." "That is ridiculous" "All this time completely wasted." "You told them what happened, and still?" "I didn't tell them." "What?" "Why not?" "It wouldn't have mattered." "It doesn't matter." "There's no point." "You can't defend that." "Where'd they go?" "No." "Where's Dr. Kass's office?" "No." "No." "Stop it." "Don't go in." "Let me try." "Let me try talking to them." "Stop helping me." "You didn't do this." "I did." "Me." "And it" " And it's done and it's over with." "I gotta get out of here." "I gotta go." "Charlie, please, I gotta go." "I..." "All right." "[INDISTINCT CHATTERING]" "Didn't your mom ever teach you not to do that?" "You could put somebody's eye out." "Yeah, yeah, and I go swimming right after I eat too." "I'm such a menace to society." "So when's your brother taking that test for you?" "As we speak, actually." "Listen, for the record, I wasn't trying to corrupt you, you know, making you that offer." "Yeah, I know." "So you're not gonna take some big moral position and rat me out, are you?" "The truth is I was kind of gonna ask if the offer still stands." "Yeah?" "Yeah." "It does." "Okay." "Good." "I appreciate it." "Friends are for." "Hey, you want to get lunch?" "It's burrito day." "No." "I don't want to have lunch." "I don't even want to talk to you." "What?" "Julia, wait." "What's wrong?" "I saw your essay, Justin." "Your entry for the Garber Award." "I'm sorry." "That you wrote it or that I saw it?" "No, that you saw it." "I can't believe that you would do something so hurtful." "I said that I didn't want you to find out about it." "Why would I say that?" "That is not the point." "God, people are gonna read that and they're gonna know it was me." "What people?" "What people?" "The head of the English department's the only one." "I'm the one with my name on it." "It's not like I come across so great either." "Is that what it is to you, Justin, a story?" "No." "An essay topic?" "No." "It was" " It was something that was painful and difficult." "And, yes, I thought it would be a good idea to write about what happened." "It happened to me." "It's my pregnancy." "It's my miscarriage." "We don't share custody on that." "Man, you were like this then and even now, you" "You don't see it." "I was there too." "I was a part of this, and I have just as much right" "[BELL RINGS]" "To what?" "To use it so you can win some stupid award so you can go to some stupid ivy league--?" "You're not even listening to me." "You better withdraw that, Justin." "You better go to the office and you better get that essay." "[FLIPPING CHANNELS]" "WOMAN:" "Tough as nails." "Quiet as an evening in springtime" "MAN:" "...Boring?" "You are boring." "[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]" "Well, I did, but you found it so dreadfully funny." "What are you doing?" "Lecturing on behavior modification." "Did you call the school?" "They, um, they said they were very sorry but that under the circumstances my, um, continued employment isn't such a good idea." "Please don't look at me like that." "Kirsten-- Don't." "I don't want you looking at me." "Okay." "I know it feels like it, but I don't think this has to be the end of the world." "I mean, you could" "I don't know" " You could take a semester off, regroup." "And then-- And then I'm sure that" "Please, stop." "I know you mean well, but just..." "Just don't." "Then tell me what you want me to say or to do." "I just want-- Anything to" " To help you, to" " To make this better for you." "I don't want it to be better." "Why should it be better?" "I did this, and-- And I need to live with it." "I did it." "It is what it is." "I did it." "And I des" " I deserve it." "I..." "I'm gonna stay home." "I'm not gonna go into work today." "Neither am I." "Do you want me to drive down and get your stuff from the apartment?" "I'll go." "You don't need to." "I have to take care of this." "I did this, and I have to take care of this." "All right." "All right." "We'll both go." "Um, I did it." "It's" " It's my fault." "And" " And" " And I deserve it, and" " And I gotta..." "I have to" " I have to just..." "Intro to Geology, Econ 10." "Ooh, Ronni Nethoff, section for Children's Literature." "She's one of our best." "Yes, I heard that." "That's" " That's why I signed up for it." "Mm." "Uh, what are you doing about the computer requirement?" "I took the proficiency test." "Doesn't it--?" "Oh, sorry." "It's right here." "Oh... oh." "You scored very well on that." "Top 10 percent." "Oh, good." "Yeah." "That was" " That was a relief." "Maybe you ought to think about taking a degree in engineering." "I'll" " I'll get back to you on that." "Everything else is in order here." "That'll do it." "Okay." "Uh, you know, Bailey, a lot of freshmen get really thrown this first week, getting adjusted and all." "You seem to be sailing right through it." "Very impressive." "Thanks." "Thank you." "We are happy to have you here." "* With my heart wide open *" "* And my eyes wide shut *" "* I'll let you walk me In the ditch *" "* I gave you all my trust *" "You got something to say to me?" "Well, kind of." "Just so you know, unless it starts with the words," ""I'm sorry I wrote that"-- No, no." "I'm not gonna apologize, and, uh, I'm not withdrawing from the contest." "Well, then, I think we had the right idea before." "Just" " Just walk away, Justin, when you see me." "And when I see you, I'll do that too, and we'll both be happy." "Is that actually gonna make you happy?" "Yes." "What do you expect?" "You" " You go out of your way to hurt me." "You think I would do that?" "You think that's why I did it?" "What am I supposed to think?" "I did it because I wanted to win." "And yes, there was a slight chance that you might find out and that it would hurt you." "And yes, Julia, I took that chance because it is not my job to look out for you in the same way anymore, and it's not your job to look out for me." "I don't buy that." "Okay." "Fine." "There's one slot left at Stanford." "It's between you and Sarah." "Who do you want to get it?" "Come on, that's dumb." "That's never gonna be that way." "I know." "I know." "Just answer the question." "Me." "All right." "Fine." "Same scenario except it's me and you." "Who are you rooting for?" "Me." "Me too." "I mean, I'm rooting for me." "Yeah, I know." "Although when you get down to it, I'm rooting for both of us." "I mean, if we both got into wherever we wanted to go, that'd be, uh..." "Yeah." "What about Sarah?" "Eh, who cares." "I've never seen her naked." "[LAUGHS]" "[SIGHS]" "We're here." "We're home." "Oh." "Go on inside." "I'll get Bay or Julia to help." "I just want to sit here." "Go ahead." "I'll be up in... in a little bit." "[***]" "[***]"