"Subs by Mothman" "Sam!" "Is this is a carjacking?" "Are you carjacking me?" "I'm the devil." "Before you were born... your mom and I sold your soul to the devil." " You gonna tell Andi?" " No, I'm not gonna tell Andi!" "If she knows, she'll think I'm a freak." "She'll never go out with me." "You can make her go out with you, Damien." "You're just gonna bring escaped souls back to hell." "That's cool, right?" "How am I supposed to capture him?" "This will help." "A vessel... handcrafted in the bowels of perdition... by the iniquitous and the vile." "That'll work." "Word of caution:" "I don't accept failure." "You finally found the one thing that you're good at." "You sent an escaped soul back to hell." "Oh, come..." "Fiddlesticks." "Dude, I need to find another place to live." "I can't do this anymore." "Sock, you can't move back to my house." "We gotta figure something else out." "I got to go." "Morning." "What?" "Was I snoring?" "A little bit." "You wanna get some food before we meet up with the guys?" "Yeah, I'm just gonna change first." "Okay." "You know, you're the first girl to infiltrate our bowling circle." "And I like you a lot, too, Sam." "Just so you know... you might get your ass handed to you today." "We bowl a lot." "Oh, yeah." "It doesn't look that hard." "Trust me." "It's harder than it looks." "Don't worry, the guys won't judge you." "Whoa!" "All right, lady and gents, do it." "I thought we agreed to lose the costume." "Excuse me." "Lose the costume, Sam?" "That's like Mick Jagger without Keith Richards... or Bono without The Edge." "It's not right." "Yeah." "So, don't go messing with our bowling ch'i." "Okay?" "I'm sorry." "No, come on, I love it." "All right, bitches." "Let's throw some balls around." "Yeah!" "Good job!" "Oh, yeah!" "Lucky streak is over." "Lucky streak is over, babe." "Psych out." "I'm telling you, it was weird." "It was like the ball had a mind of its own." "Oh, it's beginner's luck." "I wouldn't read too much into it." "No, it wasn't." "There was definitely... something else going on, you guys." "Sam, you have got to chill out." "She is not the spawn of Satan." "We saw her naked." "Remember?" "Definitely no mark of the beast." "You should hear the way she snores." "Seriously, it's not normal." "It's like she's a creature from the underworld." "Oh, God." "I love that movie." "Kate Beckinsale, black spandex." "Something wrong with her." "What?" "Kate Beckinsale is perfection." "What's wrong with you?" "No, you nimrod." "Cady." "Oh, Cady." "All right, what?" "So she snores... she's a kick-ass bowler... she's got a super-duper hot body... she's cool, and she's into you." "What else do you want?" "Hey, guys." "I'd get excited about this meeting if I were you." "I just saw Ted." "Looks like he's on a warpath." "You owe me a coffee." "Wanna get one before the meeting?" " Yeah." " Okay." "You guys want one?" "We're good." "Thanks." "Or did you mean who else does he want?" "Mm-hmm." "Now that the holiday rush is over... a few announcements to make." "First off, a great big thank you to Ira Greenblatt... for working double shifts on Christmas Eve." "Way to show that spirit of the season, buddy." "We got your back at Passover." "Dude." "But on a more negative note... it has recently come to my attention... that some of the merchandise in the store has gone missing." "I fear that we have been victims of shoplifting." "What was stolen?" "I'm not at liberty to discuss that information right now, Andi... but I don't think I need to tell you guys... that shoplifting is a very, very serious crime." "Hurts us all, Ted." "Yes, it does, Sam." "Yes, it does." "And that's why we are going on the offensive." "We will be installing an extensive video camera system... throughout the store." "I'm sure that will be a deterrent... for our so-called customers with sticky fingers." "So let's get out there, people." "Remember, keep those looking' balls open." " Let's get these guys." " Let's get 'em." " All right, boys, let's roll." " Yep." "Hey, will you cover for us?" "Where are you going?" "I finally found a sick apartment." "Gonna go check it out." "Did you not hear Ted's speech?" "I live here, Ben." "It's not stealing if it's your own house." "Come on." " Huh?" " Wow." "Take a look, boys." "What do you think of this?" "How much did you pay for this again?" "What?" "Only 1,200 bucks a month." "It was a total steal." " Yeah, you're a freakin' Jesse James." " I know." "Sock, have you not seen your paycheck?" "You don't make 1,200 bucks a month." "All I need is four." "So where you gonna get the rest, from your mom?" "No." "From you guys." " What?" " What?" "We're gonna be roomies." "I forged you guys' signatures on the lease." "Isn't that wicked?" "No!" "Sock, the last thing I need right now... is my name on another contract I didn't sign." "Dude, you should've talked to us first." "Come on." "Lookit, if I had waited... this place would've been gone like hotcakes, all right?" "We'll get the porn channel, put up a foosball table over there... maybe a little tiki bar or a hookah pipe." "I don't know, whatever we want." "All right, it's on you, dude." "I mean, we did say we wanted our own place, but..." "Benji's in." "Sammy, it's down to you." "I don't know, man." "Look..." "Ben, excuse us." "Come here." "Okay, listen to me." "I did not wanna play this card." "I really didn't, but you leave me no choice." "The fact of the matter is, you owe me." "You owe me, all right?" "I've been there since the beginning... helping you send escaped souls back to hell, man." "I've been the friggin' Robin to your Batman." "What does that make me?" "Well, you're the weird English butler guy." "Listen, I need a Bat Cave, Sammy." "I deserve a Bat Cave." "I'm Batman?" "You're Batman." "You wanna move out?" "Yeah, I'm 21, and I can't live with my parents forever." "Oh, well, no, not forever, Sam... but we thought you'd be around for at least a few more years." "Oh, come on, Mom, Dad." "We all know that Sam's gotta bust outta this joint sometime, right?" "Plus my place is awesome." "It's not like I'm moving to Australia." "I'll be five, ten minutes away." " Twenty max." " Sock." "I don't know, Sam." "Sam, I don't think you're ready to live on your own." "Oh, those are mine." "Thanks." "Your mom's right, Sam." "It's a dangerous world out there and you..." "Dangerous?" "Dad, really, dangerous?" "I think I can handle living downtown." "Well, what are you gonna do about food?" "I'll cook." "I watch The Naked Chef." "A lot." "Yeah, how hard can it be?" "Come on, this move will be good for me, all right?" "I'll learn to do things on my own." "For the first time in my life, I'll be totally independent." "If it's that important to you, then you have our support." " Yeah." " Yes!" "Thank you, Dad." "Whoa!" "Finally leaving the nest, huh?" "Finally coming out of the closet, huh?" "Oh, a homosexual joke, very witty." "Yeah, you're quite a hotshot now, huh, Sam?" "What with moving out and all?" "All right, can we just be adults and get on with this?" "Oh, sure, we can." "You're a big boy now, huh?" "Here, let me help you with this, big boy." "A playground." "Clever." "Yeah, I thought you'd appreciate the irony." "All right." "Can we get on with this?" "Oh, someone's testy today." "No, I'm not testy, I just..." "I've done this so many damn times... and I'm tired of you treating me like I'm a four-year-old." "I know what I'm doing." "As you wish, Mr. Oliver." "In life, the soul was known as Herbert Scrimm." "A total hermit, lived in the woods." "He made the Unabomber look like a social butterfly." "Okay, so what's his deal?" "Oh, Herbert was a hunter, and he killed anyone... who dare run through his neck of the woods... and now that his hunting grounds have turned into a city park... there's a lot more prey." "Where do I find him?" "In there." "But you be careful, Sammy." "This soul's a tricky one." "All the years that he lived, he was hardly ever seen." "You know, I get it." "But what's his deal?" "Like, electric shocks, bugs, what?" "I don't now what you're talking about." "You graduated, my man." "You're movin' on up." "This time it's just you... and your newfound confidence." "Why are we doing this again?" "Come on, Andi." "They're our friends." "Aren't you curious about their new place?" "No, you are up to no good, I know it." "Uh-huh." "Our first house guests." "I think it's my waterbed." "Boo-yah!" "Oh, it's you." " Hey." " Well..." "look who's finally becoming a man." "Oh, you just made it look like so much fun." "Wow, where did you guys find this place?" "We lucked out." "Think, um... it actually used to be a meth lab like two days ago." " You didn't tell me that." " Oops." "Oh, jeez." "Josie, hands off my stuff." "You mean my stuff." "I was gonna give that back." "Okay." "All right..." "R2D2 or Princess Leia?" "Definitely R2D2." "Uh-uh, last time I checked, you don't live here." "Benji, who would you rather bone... a hot chick in a gold bikini or a bleep-blop robot?" "Point taken." "Thank you." "So, Sam... where's Cady?" "I haven't told her I'm moving yet." "You haven't?" "No." "So did you tell Sam about Cady's little psycho visit?" "No, that is not my place." "Not your place?" "Sam is your friend." "If I was dating Ted Bundy, I'd want you to tell me." "Okay, that's very different." "No, it's not different." "I think you owe it to him to say something." "No, if I say one little negative thing about Cady..." "I'm gonna look like a weird, jealous freak." "Are you jealous?" "No." "No, I'm not." "I mean, Sam and I are just friends." "I've said it a hundred times." " Andi, I'm your best friend." " Uh-huh." " Don't lie to me." " I'm not." "Look, if you have feelings for Sam... you should say something." "Especially when this Cady girl... seems to be nothing but bad news." "No, no." "He's with Cady." "I just have to accept it." "You know, he didn't even tell her he moved." "Maybe he's already figured it out for himself." "This is the second body dumped in the park... in the last two weeks." "Police are asking anyone who's seen or heard anything... to please come forward." "Reporting from Burbury Park, this is Laureen Glenroy." "Back to you, Rick." "That's gotta be our guy." "Devil said he was a hunter." "Why is he killing so many people?" "It must be the thrill of the kill." "Well, how many people does he need to kill... before he's satisfied?" "He's an escaped soul from hell, Benji." "He's never satisfied." "Oh, hey, look." "First housewarming gift." "Oh, very funny, devil." "Open it." "Go." "What?" "Oh, dude, Magic Bullet." "Oh." "I've been wanting one of these forever." " What is it?" " A vibrator?" "A vib..." "Are you kidding me?" "A vibrator?" "No, this is actually the coolest kitchen appliance... known to man, all right?" "Bar none, the best countertop food processor... out there on the infomercial market." "I've been saving up three easy payments... of 19.99 for this bad boy." ""No confusing buttons, no messy cords." ""A battery-operated processor that is both functional and fun." ""Nothing could be more simple."" " How does it..." " See?" "How does it work?" "What the hell?" "Dude." "Oh, whoa." "Hey." "You missed a spot." "What are you doing here?" "Just brought you a white hot chocolate." "I went to your place today... but your parents said you moved out." "Were you gonna tell me?" "Yeah." "No, Sock found us a place... and it just..." "It happened really quickly so..." "You didn't think I needed to know?" "No, of course you needed to know." "I just..." "I'm telling you now." "So we're okay?" "Yeah, we're okay." "What's with the camera?" "Oh, yeah." "Ted's waging a war against shoplifters." "He's installing a whole new security system." "Think he's watching us right now?" "Probably." "You wanna give him something to look at?" "What?" "Nothing, nothing." "Whoa." "Are you all right?" "Yeah, that was weird, right?" "Yeah, that was really weird." "Are..." "You're good?" "Yup." "I should clean this up." "Do you wanna have dinner tonight?" "You know, I got a lot of stuff to do." "I got boxes to unpack, my apartment's a mess and... but I'll call you." "I'll give you a call." "Okay." "Well, I'll let you get to it." "Maybe there was a flaw in the glass already, Sam." "No, it's like she somehow made it happen." "Maybe you made it happen." "You're cracking, man." "It's giving me the creeps." "Every time I look at her, it's all I can think about." "I don't know, maybe I should break up with her." "Okay, boys." "All right." "You guys ready for a little braingasm... ultimate gaming experience?" "This is a thing of beauty." "All right, let's fire this bitch up." "Let's go." "Oh, my God." " Heaven." " Let's go." "No!" "No!" "What'd you do?" "What did you press?" "I did not touch anything." "Look, the sooner we figure it out, the sooner we can be lounging." "Just ask these guys, see what's going on... or ladies." "You never know." "I was about to beat your ass, too." " Were not." " Yes, I was." "Hi there." "Hi." "Sorry to bother you." "We just moved in next door." "Oh, hi!" "Great, welcome." "I'm Steve." "Sam." "And this is Sock and Ben." "Hey." "Sock?" "Well, that's an unusual name." "Is that the UPS guy?" "It's the new neighbors!" "Is he hitting on me?" "He's not hitting on you." "This is my partner Tony." "Hi, fellas." "Hi." "Would you guys like to come in?" "I just made a pot of ginger tea." "No." "No, thanks." "We're straight." "No, thank you." "We actually..." "We just came in, uh, to..." "We were wondering if you could help us with something." "With what?" " All right." " Hey." "You are quite the handyman." "Hey, you fellas have a couple of light bulbs out." "I could fix that for you." "No, that's all right." "We hardly use the kitchen anyway, so..." "Oh, whoa, speak for yourself, man." "I practically am The Naked Chef." "Not that I cook naked." "You guys want a drink or anything?" "I would." "We don't have anything in the fridge." "That is maybe... the saddest-looking refrigerator I've ever seen." "Yeah." "Tell you guys what, tomorrow night... you're coming over to our place for a home-cooked meal... and I hope you're not watching your carbs... because I am thinking pasta." "Oh, my God." "You guys are in for a treat." "Steve makes the most delicious lobster mac and cheese." "He poaches the lobster in a beurre blanc?" " Beurre blanc..." " Sauce." "With mascarpone cheese." "Unbelievable." "Oh, beautiful." "The mascarpone perfectly neutralizes... the natural sweetness of the lobster." "It's The Food Network." "So what do you guys say?" "I say what time do we show up?" "It's a date." "Let's get together..." "with some dudes." "All right, hey, listen, just gonna say this once." "I'm not into dudes... but I think I kinda love Steve and Tony." "I know, they're awesome, huh?" "I gotta hand it to you, Sock, this place is pretty good." "Didn't I tell you you'd love it?" "Did I not tell you you'd love it?" "All right, let's get out to the woods... catch this soul bitch." "I got places to be." "Like where?" "Uh, like The Work Bench." "You picked up an extra shift?" "Hey, man, I got rent to pay now." "Wow, that's really responsible of you." "I know." "No, I'm just messin' with you." "All right, I gotta hook up with this chick at the pool." "I met her in the elevator." "She is so into me." "Hey, nice headband, bro." "Looks good." "Don't these trees look familiar?" "It's a forest, Sam, they all look the same." "Yeah, but I feel like we're going in circles." "This park is ridiculously huge." "How are we supposed to find the soul?" "We should get a bird's-eye view." "All right." " All right, who's climbing it?" " Ben." "Come on, guys, I've never climbed a tree before." " What?" " Benny, come on." "Well, my parents were a little overprotective." "So what?" "All right, you know what, it's time you became a man." "I'll give you a boost." "Hold this." "Hang on to my baby." "I don't know if she's under warranty still." "Gimme your foot." "I can't believe I'm climbing a tree." "Get up there." "I can't believe I'm actually climbing a tree." "I feel like Spider-man." "The view's amazing, guys." "The soul?" "Keep your eye on the ball, buddy." "Okay." "Oh, no, Ben!" "Benji!" "Oh, my God!" "Ben, are you all right?" "Don't move." "It's okay." "Oh, dead guy, dead guy, dead guy!" "All right, here you go, Benji." "I'm an injured man." "Take it easy." "You fell out of a tree, shake it off." "Victim was Frank Moye." "He was 31." "God, I can't believe the soul... was right underneath our noses the whole time." "Poor Frank." "I always knew jogging was bad for you." "We should go jogging." "Are you kidding me?" "Did you not just hear me say jogging bad?" "No, Sock, think about it." "What better way to lure him out into the open?" "All right, wait, let me get this straight." "You want us to go jogging in the creepy woods... where the soul has been killing people?" "Yeah." "Okay, let's go." "I knew this was a bad idea, Sam." "Why did I let you talk me into this?" "Hey, stop!" "I can't breathe, I can't breathe." "I'm gonna stop." "All right." "Let's take a breather." "I'm not loving this outfit, either, Sam." "I feel like a giant traffic cone." "Sock, we want the soul to see us." "I'm pretty sure the space shuttle could see us, Ben." "All right." "Well, we gotta keep moving, let's go." " No." " Come on." " Come on!" " All right." "Okay, let's go." "All right, I got another one." "Supergirl or Wonder Woman?" " Wonder Woman." " Definitely Wonder Woman." "Something to be said for a woman who's into bondage, you know?" "I love it." "Who was that, Cady?" "Yeah, I don't wanna talk to her right now." "I don't know, Sammy." "You ignore the spawn of Satan, something bad might happen." "What was that?" "Come on." "Look." "Oh, my God." "She broke her neck." "I think he's close." "Yeah, you think?" "What was that?" "Where is he?" "Don't... move." "What?" " What?" " What?" "Why?" "God!" "Oh, God!" " Guys, get me outta here!" " Calm down, Sock!" "Calm down, Sock, we'll get you down." "No, get the soul!" "You just said to get you out!" "I know." "Yeah, get me out." "Make up your mind, Sock!" "What do you want?" "Yeah, get the soul." "Get him." " Get the soul." " Shh, he's here." " What?" " Huh?" " Okay, come on." " Come on out, Herbert!" "It's over." "Let's go!" "Oh, guys!" "Look out!" "Sam!" "Sam!" "Dude, it's not working!" "It has to be Sam!" "Do something!" "Huh?" "Oh, my God!" "Okay, pull him outta there." " Stop that!" "Come here!" " There it is, okay." "Come here right now!" "Oh!" "I said come!" "I'm so sorry." "I hope they didn't scare you." "No, no, it's..." "We love dogs." "Beautiful bitches, all of them." "Dude, this idea of yours better work." "It will." "There's only one way to make an invisible soul visible." "Paintball!" "I kill at paintball." "Hey, maybe you should ask the devil to help us on this one." "He's not gonna help us." "He loves watching me freak out." "Sam Oliver... your assistance is required at aisle four." "Oh, damn it." "I gotta go help Ted... install those new security cameras." "Will you guys take care of this?" " You ready?" " Uh-huh." "Come on." "These cameras cost me an arm and a leg, Sam." "Watch it up there." "Ah, the innocence of youth." "I bet the last time you sat at one of these little desks... you had dreams of great things." "And look at you now, Sam, working a minimum-wage job... living in a dumpy apartment... and doing the devil's dirty work." "Seeing red now, Sammy?" "Very funny." "Why didn't you tell me Herbert was invisible?" "Now, I said that nobody ever saw Herbert." "Oh, well..." "Figured with your genius wit, you'd piece it together." "I mean, don't you know that being invisible... is the perfect camouflage?" "I'm surprised at you, Sammy." "With all your newfound confidence..." "I thought you'd pass this test with flying colors." "Looks like you're going to fail." "No, I'm not gonna fail." "Just give me something to work with." "Like these?" "Glasses?" "They help you see the true face of evil." "You don't want to do that, Sam." "Trust me." "Unless you brought a change of underwear." "Well, go on, say it." "You're not as good as you thought you were." "You need me." "Forget that." "Take 'em back." "You can have these." "I don't need you." "Oh, grumble, grumble, grumble." "Well, I guess we're taking off the training wheels." "Yeah, I guess so." "This'll be fun to watch." "Oh, yeah." "Good luck, Sam." "Hey, Andi!" "Cady, hi." "You know what?" "Sam's not here." "I think he's making a delivery or something." "That's okay." "I actually wanted to talk to you." "Oh, okay." "Well, what's up?" "Something going on with Sam?" "Well, what do you mean?" "He's been acting a little weird lately." "He always acts weird." "I wouldn't worry about it." "Yeah, it's just he's been... a little distant with me, you know?" "Like I call him, leave him a message, he doesn't call me back." "Well, you know, maybe he's just preoccupied... you know, with the move and all." "Yeah, the move." "Hmm." "Just can't help but wondering if maybe... it might have something to do with you." "Me?" "I know you and Sam had a thing." "Cady, listen... me and Sam are friends." "That's it." "Well, I really care about him, you know?" "Mm-hmm." "I just wish I knew what was going on." "Okay, we see the soul when we paintball him... but how the hell are we supposed to track where he is?" "Yeah, well, maybe you should've kept the glasses... the devil gave to you." "No, we don't need him." "We can do it on our own." "Guys, please, would you knock it off?" "Can we just not talk about demons and devils for five minutes?" "I wanna go in there..." "I wanna eat my gourmet macaroni and cheese... and I wanna hang out... with my two favorite domestic gods, all right?" "Just a minute!" "Nice threads." "Thank you, I know." "Steve and Tony took me shopping." "It's like living next door to Queer Eye For The Straight Guy." "What's with the power tools?" "I don't know." "Hey, right on time." "Come on in." "All right!" "Nice place." "Well, it's home." "Hey, hey, hey, who needs a drink?" "We brought beer." "Oh, that was very thoughtful." "Give that to him." "I'm gonna go get the hors d'oeuvres." "Guys, make yourself comfortable." "You, bar." "Bar." "All right, I like it." "Hey, you clean up nice." "Thank you, thank you." "Oh, my God." "You have an '89 Glenfiddich in a Spode bottle." "Glenfiddich, yeah." "You a fan?" "Well, I mean, I knew it existed." "I just never thought I'd see one up this close." "It is beautiful!" "And tasty-lookin'." "Let me pour you a glass." "Okay." "You guys do a lot of charity work." "Yeah, we enjoy helping others." "It's good for the soul." "Yeah." "Yeah, I once gave a homeless guy... in front of The Work Bench half my sandwich... so I can dig it." "You remember that?" "Yeah, I remember." "Oh, that was kind of you." "Fresh out of the oven." "Who wants pancetta-wrapped shrimp?" "God, yes!" "Help yourselves." "There's plenty more where that came from... but save room for the mac and cheese." "Better than my mom's cooking." "Well, you know what Emreril says..." ""Pork fat rules."" "Oh, man!" "Oh, don't worry about that." "I've got something that will take that right out." "Come with me to the kitchen." "You boys continue." "Tony spills food on himself all the time." "I have to buy these pens in bulk." "Hey, Steven, what are those things?" "Oh, those are, uh... power sanders." "We're putting up some crown molding." "Wow." "That's impressive." "I'll tell you what's impressive." "Check out the security system in here." "I'm in home security, so privacy... super important to us." "We've got top-of-the-line cameras all over... and those motion detectors, they protect us... against all the threats you can't see." " Really?" " Yeah." "And this shirt is done." "Good as new." "Thank you." "Dinner is served." "Like George C. Scott says..." ""You gotta dress brave to be brave, boys."" "General Patton, you idiot." "Same guy." "All right, let's do this." "Go time." "What the..." "You gotta be kidding me." "Morning, Ted." "You see?" "You see what I mean?" "Yeah, you really are a morning person." "No, the cameras." "Somebody stole the cameras." "Are you serious?" " It's not funny." " Yes, it is." "This is horrible." "Now I gotta buy cameras to watch the cameras." "Well, is anything else missing?" "I guess not." "Well, you should be thankful." "Thankful." "Thankful." "Whoa, what's with all the people?" "What is it?" "A charity run?" "Yeah, right through the soul's hunting ground." "Might as well just put a freakin' bull's-eye on their back." "Oh, hey." "You know what?" "You go kick invisible's ass." "I got this." "Sock, how are you gonna do that?" "In the words of Gandalf the Great..." ""They shall not pass."" "It's"you shall not pass."" "Whatever." "Ben, it's a movie, okay?" " Whatever." " Go." "What was that?" "Squirrel." "Is that him?" "Woodpecker." "Not much of a nature guy, are you?" "I told you, my parents were a little overprotective." "Oh, what is it?" "He's close." "Whoa!" "Stop!" "Hey!" "Whoa." "I'm sorry, stop." "I can't let you through here today." "We're with Protect the Trees." "We've got a permit." "I'm sorry." "All permits have been revoked." "Give it, come on." "Give it." " Excuse me?" " Give it!" "We're just trying to protect the trees." "If you really wanna save and protect trees... show them some love." "Physically." "Come on out, Herbert!" "You coward!" "That's right." "Yeah, don't be shy." "Go on, pick a tree... and just hug it and don't ever let go." "All right, everybody, enjoy!" "I'll be back in ten, okay?" "Okay." "Do you have the vessel?" "What?" "I thought you had it." "No, you had it, you remember?" "No, I didn't." " Sock!" " Sock!" "Hey, let him go!" "Guys?" "I'm coming!" "Benji!" "Benji!" "Hammer." "Back off, Herbie!" "Face, Ben, face!" "Throw me the vessel!" "Throw the vessel!" " Yeah!" " That's what I'm talkin' about!" "Oh, man, we got him." "Oh, that is disgusting." "I'm officially over smoothies." "Okay, can somebody tell me what's going on with my cameras?" "Somebody's idea of a joke?" "'Cause it's not funny!" "As you can tell, I'm not laughing!" "Please tell me you're the genius who stole Ted's security system." "I have no idea what you're talking about." "Oh, okay." "So... how's Cady?" "She's good." "Good." "So you guys are good?" "Yeah, Andi, this is kind of weird." "I know, I know." "Listen, she came to see me." "She did?" "What did she want?" "What did she say?" "You know, it's actually not what she said... more how she said it." "What do you mean?" "Listen, I know your personal life is your business... but I really would be careful of Cady." "I just get a weird vibe, and I thought you should know." "All right." "Hey, classy digs, Sammy." "I really like what you've done with the place." "Look, I don't have time to play host today." "I gotta go meet Cady." "Ooh, I sense tension in your voice." "Trouble in paradise?" "You don't need to worry about it." "Hey, come on now." "I told you before... you're much more than just an employee." "I care about you." "All right, fine." "You know what?" "There is something." "See, I knew it, I knew it." "Go on, lay it on me." "Get it off your chest." "Are you having trouble satisfying her?" "No." "I'm doing just fine, thank you." "Come on, I'm just trying to have a little fun with you." "Don't be so sensitive." "Talk to me." "All right, listen, I'm gonna ask you something... and, for once, I need you to give me a straight answer." "Ooh, you sound serious." "Will you tell me the truth?" "All right." "Is Cady your daughter?" "No." "See, I don't believe you." "And that's your problem." "If you really like this girl... you shouldn't let anything come between you." "Anyway, I just wanted to congratulate you, man." "Looks like you caught Herbie all by yourself." "I guess you really don't need me all the time." "Thank you." "Hey, why don't you, uh... keep these... as a souvenir?" "You never know when you're gonna need to see... somebody's true colors." "Hey." "Hey." "We need to talk." "I know." "Listen, I know I've been distant... and I'm sorry, but the truth is..." "I don't wanna hear it, Sam." "Look, I want to take some time." "I'm gonna go down to New Mexico." "I'm gonna see my mom for a couple of days." "I need a little space." "Wait, what?" "No." "Things are good." "Things are not good." "Sam, you don't return my phone calls... you don't want to hang out with me... you didn't even tell me you moved." "I know." "I'm sorry." "All right, look, I think, um..." "I think this will be good for us." "We'll just take some time, and we'll think things through." "We'll talk when I get back." "You know what?" "I never thought I was a goat-cheese person... but this stuff isn't bad." "Oh, you should try the crab dip." "I'm telling you, Steve and Tony, new idols." "I love those guys." "Oh, they're going on my top eight." "That's very nice of you." "Hey, bud." "Hey." "Hey." "Can I get you something or..." "Crab dip?" "No, I'm good." "Don't worry about it, Sammy." "Come on." "Cady will come crawling back to you in a week... when she realizes how much she misses your man muscle." "Absolutely, it's just a hiatus." "Hey, have you guys seen my shirts?" "Yes." "Steve and Tony have 'em." "They need to be laundered, right?" "That's right." "You guys think it's kinda weird... we replaced our parents with a couple of gay dudes?" "Weird, Sam?" "No." "Genius." "Steve?" "Tony?" "Guys?" "Sometimes I think it'd be easier just to wear a hat." "What?" "No." "I feel like my horns are getting fatter." "No, you look great." "I think you've lost weight so the horns look bigger." "You think I lost weight?" "Yeah, you look great." "Well, I'm really trying." "I know." "You've been so disciplined and I really think..." "What's the matter with you?" "You look like you just saw a ghost." "No, worse." "Demons." "What?" "Where?" "Next door." "Steve and Tony." "Both demons."