"♪ Theme music ♪" "(Exhales)" "YOUNG GIRL:" "Mum, I can't find my shoes." "Don't know where I left them before." "YOUNG BOY:" "Where's my iPod?" "WOMAN:" "Adam!" "Melissa!" "I've been looking everywhere for ages now." "Come on, guys." "Help me out today, please." "(Groans)" "On the day before his 40th birthday," "Hector awoke with one thing in mind." "Connie." "For a moment, he luxuriated in the memory of her." "But then he made his resolve." "To sort things out." "(Grunts)" "♪ CLASSICAL MUSIC ♪" "Hey, I'm up." "(Music stops)" "Hey, I was listening to that." "No." "It's got to be Satchmo today." "♪ SLOW JAZZ ♪" "Slow." "Very slow." "(Hums)" "We've got people arriving in three hours." "Well, you can do a ring round." "Tell 'em I got the flu." "Stay home, drink champagne, fuck." "I'm marinating meat, see." "I could do with some marinating." "(Chuckles)" "Oh, if you're looking for your cigarettes," "I've chucked them." "Say that again?" "Um... you said you were giving up." "I am, tomorrow." "Oh, fine, well, they're right there in the bin." "MELISSA:" "I want it!" "ADAM:" "No, it's my game..." "MELISSA:" "Dad, Dad!" "Alright, you win." "(Chuckles)" "I'm going in nicotine free." "(Children yell continuously)" "If I don't come back, you know who's to blame." "You need to give me a turn." "No." "She's a baby, she can't play properly." "Can so." "Adam, let her play, mate." "She called me a fat pig." "(Car tyres screech)" "Where'd you get these bloody chips?" "Jesus, Adam." "What is wrong with you?" "It's breakfast time." "This is not breakfast food." "Mate, all I'm saying is it's a beautiful day, go outside and get some fresh air, huh?" "Whatever." "It's all yours, sweetheart." "But I wanted to play with Adam." "Well, you'll just have to play by yourself." "Why don't you just play alone for a little while and I guarantee that if you just sit there doing nothing, minding your own business," "Adam will be back wanting to join in." "How about that?" "OK." "Mmm?" "I don't want to know if it's him or me." "Just get in the shower." "(Speaks indistinctly, chuckles)" "So are you OK now?" "Yes." "(Speaks indistinctly)" "(Phone rings)" "WOMAN ON MACHINE:" "Hector?" "(Speaks Greek)" "What's she saying?" "Oh, Mum's just got meat she wants to bring." "Our fridge is full of meat." "I've already told her that." "Well, maybe I'll pick it up and tell her again." "(Machine beeps)" "Oh, I'll call her later." "Yeah." "Hey, uh... have you got any valium?" "It's nearly 10:30." "I'd have to pick some up." "I don't wanna do it." "I've gotta go to Harry's, get the barbie," "I could swing past your surgery on the way back." "♪ I've got plenty of time... ♪ (Laughs)" "♪ I've got plenty of time... ♪ No, listen." "Is the idea of this party really so awful that you need to get bombed?" "(Laughs) I just thought I ought to be prepared for when Mum starts breaking my balls." "It's not balls she's gonna break." "So I'm taking care of you, then, Aish." "Yeah." "Look, it's on my way." "I'll be in and out." "You look like a bum." "Yes, but a very handsome bum." "Mmm, you sure?" "Alright!" "But Rosie's getting here at 12." "I want you here too." "Done." "And remember, get some ice..." "and ring your mum!" "NARRATOR:" "Hector made a bargain with himself... if the traffic lights stayed green, he'd forget his resolution for today, drive straight on through to Harry's, and put off talking to Connie until tomorrow." "Oh, shit." "(Tyres screech)" "GIRL:" "Can I have one?" "I didn't know you smoked." "Just sometimes." "♪ SOFT JAZZ ♪" "This music's beautiful." "Yeah." "Yeah, it is." "Well, here we are." "Aisha already paid you, right?" "So you're babysitting next Wednesday, usual time?" "NARRATOR:" "Hector considered what might happen if he allowed things to go any further with Connie." "Public humiliation, divorce, loneliness, despair, suicide." "(Dog barks)" "Just going to pop through." "Um..." "I'll call you back in five, OK?" "What are you doing here?" "Aisha asked me to drop by and pick up some valium." "They're in the consult room." "If Brendan's with someone, I can wait." "Oh, no, I can get it." "Is this enough?" "Yeah, plenty, thanks." "Listen, Connie, I was thinking, um..." "You OK to leave the desk a minute?" "Totally." "I..." "I'd kill for a cigarette." "Better keep an eye out for Brendan, because if he catches me smoking, he'll go nuts." "I'm supposed to be giving up." "You should." "I'm only going to smoke till I'm 21." "(Coughs)" "What?" "Nothing." "What did you want to talk about?" "We're having a party this arvo." "Maybe you should come." "Do you want me to come?" "Why do you think I'm here?" "(Phone rings)" "Such a prick." "Such a fucking prick." "Hogarth Road Vet Clinic, how can I help you?" "Yep." "Um... uh..." "Do you mind holding?" "I better get back to it." "Yeah, listen the party..." "Yeah, I finish one, I could be there, like, 1:30." "Um... hello?" "You bastard." "(Laughs) You bastard." "Come on, come in, it's hot." "No, I've got to move, mate." "Why?" "We've got people coming, Vre." "Ah..." "You're pussy-whipped." "Mate, the barbie's gonna take five minutes to load." "Heeeeyyy." "Fuck, mate, you're ripped. (Laughs)" "Well, well, public servant makes a quick decision." "Argh!" "There's a first time for everything." "Rah!" "My cousin, 40 years old." "Yeah." "Unbelievable." "Not 40 yet, mate." "Yeah, well..." "Not 40 yet." "(Laughs)" "Yeah, enjoy while you can, cuz." "You know what, you only live once." "Don't forget that." "Here he comes." "Here he is." "Come on, show me what you got." "Nice bomb." "Hey, Uncle Hector, happy birthday." "Thanks, mate." "Look at you two, bobbing in there like a pair of pickles." "Here, babe." "Oh, Sandi, I've gotta move." "Come on, it's your birthday." "Argh!" "Hey, you're still 39, remember?" "Happy birthday." "So he's watching TV, Pinocchio or something, and all of a sudden he's P-L-A-Y-I-N-G with it!" "(Giggles) All kids do." "You'd be worried if he didn't." "(Laughter)" "Yeah, but to Pinocchio?" "Eugh!" "(Laughs)" "Adam used to play with himself in front of Play School." "You can't blame him." "That Jemima's a sexy minx." "(Laughter)" "Hey, Gazza." "Hey, Hector the birthday boy." "How's it going, mate?" "Good." "You don't look a day over 39 and a half, three quarters maybe." "Yeah, you'll be there soon, mate." "Happy birthday for tomorrow." "Thank you." "I was about to send out a search party." "Oh, barbie was buried under junk." "Had to empty half of Harry's garage to get it out." "(Bangs loudly) Do you want a beer?" "Mmm." "Thank you." "I'm going to have a quick shower and then I'll put the calamari on." "Oh, I'll do it." "No, you've done enough, sweetheart." "Calamari is mine." "Might just give that a rest now, hey, mate?" "(Whines)" "(Sighs)" "(Grunts) WOMAN:" "I bring the meat." "(Sighs) Where's my boy?" "(Fuck.) Where's my Hector?" "Here's certainly a lot." "It's better too much, darling." "If there's any left, you have for dinner tomorrow." "Dinner?" "Bloody hell, we could open a deli." "I told you not to bring..." "(Speaks Greek)" "Koula, maybe I'm gonna put some of this in the laundry for now." "No, darling." "Laundry's too dirty." "Plenty of room here, let me fix it." "Mum, let Aish..." "Let Aish handle it, OK?" "No, no, no." "That one's staying on there..." "Dad." "Po po po!" "Tha fame kala." "Look at all this beautiful food!" "Ela, Aisha mou." "Thank you." "I think you're going to make my son into a fatty, huh?" "Mum couldn't manage it, I think Aisha has a chance." "Hey, Lizzie." "Mmm." "Are you good?" "If this government cared more about social services and started hiring again, I'd be better." "What's the point of complaining?" "None at all." "Don't let that stop you." "Koula." "Hi." "Hi." "How about I put some of this aside..." "Yes, Rosie." "But first let me take some of these cakes for the children?" "No more for my kids, Mum." "Please!" "(Speaks Greek)" "Oh, it weighs a tonne." "Jesus, for the record, your laundry's cleaner than my kitchen." "I thought you were going to call them." "Shit, I forgot the ice." "Oh, I've been up since 6am, cooking, cleaning." "OK, OK, but was I right, or was I right?" "You're definitely right." "Later, OK." "Are you two doing drugs?" "(Yeah.) Baklava!" "Want some?" "Do you want to score?" "Grow up." "(Makes silly noises)" "Hey, I forgot." "While I was at the clinic, I invited Connie." "Really?" "But she won't know anyone." "Well, Brendan's coming." "Brendan?" "Brendan's 20 years older than her." "What will they talk about?" "I just thought it was rude not to." "She's been doing such a great job babysitting." "Oh." "You always have to be Mr Popular." "Hey, Adam, you want to lend a hand, help get this thing off here?" "Do I have to?" "No, you don't have to." "I just thought you might want to help." "Oh, Jesus, Dad." "Is the last one, I forgot in the boot." "Hey, I help you." "(Laughs)" "How you tie him on, lucky the bloody thing didn't fall off by itself." "Yeah, well, it didn't, did it?" "Righto." "Got it?" "On three." "OK." "Alright - one, two, three..." "Hey, wait...!" "Whoa!" "Let go, we've got it!" "Adam, move your fat arse and help your grandfather!" "Now!" "It's alright, son." "You alright?" "It's my bad knee." "(Speaks Greek)" "Well, if it's been such a problem, why the hell are you shifting barbecues?" "(Speaks Greek)" "Come on." "Hey, mate." "You OK?" "Listen, I, uh..." "I got a scare." "I thought Pappou was gonna really hurt himself." "But, still, I shouldn't have snapped at you." "I'm sorry." "OK?" "Come here." "Hey, how about we get the barbie lit?" "We haven't done one together for yonks." "OK." "Yeah?" "Come on." "Hectora, your father's knees is swelling like a balloon!" "Last month I made him an appointment to get it checked out." "You think he turned up?" "Doctors can't do nothing." "If the leg is gone, you put the dog down, eh, Aisha mou?" "I think the dog's got a few years left in him yet." "Hectora..." "Your father and me, we've got you a present for your birthday." "Do you want to do it now?" "Yes, it's a very special present." "There you are." "It's for the whole family." "We all go together to Greece." "Mum, you can't afford this." "The whole family?" "Yes." "So, what am I?" "You go to Greece last year." "Hector hasn't been to Greece since his children were born." "We can't accept this." "It's for us too." "So that we can spend the holiday all together with the grandchildren." "It's too much, but thank you." "(Speaks Greek)" "It's incredibly generous." "Thank you." "I'm just, um..." "I'm wondering about Bali." "What Bali?" "Oh, we already have a holiday booked." "Remember you said you'd take the kids while we were away." "Forget Bali." "If you go to Bali, they put a bomb on you." "This is Greece." "It's our anniversary." "You can have anniversary in Greece." "There's a way we can work this out." "Can't we do both?" "There's a week between." "It's four days." "Mum, Dad, we are blown away." "This is so generous." "The Bali thing, we'll sort it out." "It's not gonna be a problem." "Isn't that right, Aish?" "Hey?" "Yeah, I'm..." "I'm just gonna check the oven." "(Speaks Greek)" "Alright." "So..." "Greece, hey?" "I reckon we... better barbecue to celebrate." "Adam, you wanna start scraping?" "(Speaks Greek)" "Oh, she'll be fine." "Mate, we need some paper towels." "I already said I'll sort it out." "Hey, Hector?" "Oh, mate." "Bloody good to see you." "Happy birthday, mate." "Thanks, mate." "Yassou, Manolis." "Kala, re, Terry, how you going, eh?" "Dad, his name's Bilal." "No, it's cool." "I answer to all sorts of things." "And we got you a card." "The kids made it themselves." "Ooh, let me see." "Yeah, well, that certainly says it all." "Hey, Terry, you want a drink, eh?" "Dad." "Light beer, like me?" "Light, heavy, I can't do it anymore, Manoli." "Let me grab you a Coke, hey?" "Sorry about that." "No, it's alright." "I was always pissed." "What are you gonna do?" "We were young, right?" "I'm glad that's all over." "Oh, mate, are you serious?" "Come on!" "The bands, the chicks." "I just prefer what I've got now." "Yeah." "Yeah..." "Now's good too." "♪ JAZZ ♪" "We can't do both trips." "Your leave entitlements won't cover it." "I can take unpaid time." "OK, but I'm in private practice, it was hard enough to swing Bali." "Brendan'll cover if you ask him." "Brendan?" "He hasn't had a holiday in over a year and now he's supposed to cover while I have two in a row?" "You're getting old, Aish." "Maybe we'll look back and wish we'd made this kind of thing a priority." "Hector, I can't remember the last time we had a holiday just the two of us without the kids." "Don't you think that's a priority too?" "Alright." "Alright, I hear you." "OK?" "Don't look now, but I think we have a celebrity in the house." "ADAM:" "Look, Tobin's here!" "She brought him?" "Who?" "Anouk's beau, the soap star." "I never believe you did the murder, never!" "I always know, you innocent." "Oh, thanks for the confidence, Mrs Sossidis." "You better go." "Reece, I don't usually watch soaps." "No offence, they're just not my style." "But I really do love your work." "Oh, thank you, thank you." "Can I take your picture?" "Yeah, of course." "It's a very good show!" "Very good issue, you know." "Anouk!" "Hi, how are you?" "Good to see." "Help." "Help." "Ah, you must be Reece, right?" "Yeah." "Yeah, I'm Hector." "Ah, happy birthday, Hector." "Oh, thanks, mate." "You look like a man who could use a drink." "OK?" "Oh, yeah, yeah." "Make that two." "Well, come inside, I've got a couple with your names on and ready to go." "I'd love to talk later, Rhys, about a drama group for the homeless I'm trying to organise." "Oh, OK." "I guess you must get that all the time?" "No." "What he normally gets is teenage girls posting him their G-strings." "Koula looked like she was about to rip her knickers off and throw 'em at ya." "Rosie!" "Don't worry, mate." "I promise you that is not gonna happen on my watch." "So..." "It's great to finally meet you, Rhys." "Oh, cheers." "ALL:" "Cheers, cheers." "Great to meet you all, I've heard so much about you." "We've heard nothing about you." "Oh, really?" "Well, I didn't want to throw you to the piranha sisters over here." "Good call." "Oh, we're not that bad, are we?" "It's alright, I can swim." "You do look quite different in real life." "(Sighs) I wouldn't agonise for too long if I were you." "To most people, all jazz sounds the same." "Hey, it's my party." "I hear you're giving up smoking." "You ought to do the same if you're gonna keep up with wonder boy over there." "You better be nice, or I might not give you your birthday present." "I'm always nice." "♪ JAZZ ♪" "Remember Charlie?" "If you want it." "(Children shout in background)" "(Screaming and shouting)" "What's going on?" "He bit me." "GIRL:" "He bit him for no reason!" "Really?" "Let me see." "Oh, I'm sure he didn't mean it, darling." "He did it on purpose!" "Look, the teeth marks!" "ADAM:" "How can you bite..." "What is going on here?" "He bit me!" "(Children yell indistinctly)" "Quiet, quiet!" "Come on, sweetheart." "Booby, I want booby." "Come on, my sweetheart." "(Children laugh) Booby!" "Adam." "You show some respect to our guests or I swear I'll..." "Be in your room." "Why do I always get blamed?" "He didn't do anything." "Hugo bit me." "Why do you think, Adam?" "What's going on?" "(Sighs) Little brat bit Sava." "Why?" "Fighting over the TV." "Why don't we switch it off?" "Oh, Jesus, they'll go nuts." "Oh, can you help me out just this once?" "What's that supposed to mean?" "Booby!" "(Children snigger)" "Adam, I'm not blaming you, mate, OK?" "But you're the oldest here and Hugo's the youngest." "I'm trusting you to look out for him, understood?" "Whatever." "(Laughter and chatter)" "(Knock at door) Hello." "Hey, just leave the door unlocked like that?" "Ah." "Papouli." "Happy birthday, grandpa." "Na tos o poustis ah." "(Both laugh) Eh." "Eh." "Hey." "Say happy birthday." "Rocco." "Hey, mate." "Hi." "How are you, little buddy?" "Alright?" "Yeah, good." "Hello, how are you?" "Look at this." "Look at this." "(Speaks Greek)" "ADAM:" "Rocco, I've got a new game controller." "Wow, look at that spread!" "Did Aish do that all by herself?" "Oh, yeah, Mum did the salads, but other than that, yeah." "Yeah, of course." "Mate, there's a feast." "Caterers couldn't do better than that." "Put this in the... inside, yeah?" "Yeah." "It's beautiful." "She's a good woman." "I'll go say hi." "Ooh." "Sorry, it's just me." "I'm sweating like a pig." "I just wanted to say what you've done out there, it's incredible." "And if a starving football team shows up, it might even get eaten." "Did you talk to your parents?" "About what?" "Greece." "No, but it doesn't have to be sorted out right now, does it?" "The longer you leave it the harder it gets." "You've decided we're not going?" "It's our anniversary." "Well, they didn't know that." "Oh, come on." "Your mother knew what she was hijacking." "She doesn't forget an anniversary." "(Sighs) Why are you riding me today?" "Riding you?" "First I'm in the doghouse for running late." "Then you undercut me with the kids." "Bullshit!" "Now my parents because they bought us a trip most people dream about." "Dragging kids around a country where I don't speak the language, visiting your 550 fucking cousins is not my dream!" "Fine, you win." "I never wanted a big party, either, but you pushed that through too just like you push everything." "Now you got your big party, can't you at least let me enjoy it?" "Have a ball." "Fuck." "Aisha... ♪ LOUD JAZZ ♪" "Oh, Hugo, no, those aren't for kids." "(Screams) No, no, no, no, no!" "(Hugo screams continuously)" "(Sighs)" "(Laughter and chatter)" "Aisha." "I'm so sorry for what I said about the party." "I'm..." "Please, I'm ashamed of myself." "Just forget it." "We've got guests." "I'm trying to apologise." "And I'm just saying, just get on with it." "OK?" "Jesus." "NARRATOR:" "Hector fantasised about walking out and flying to Latin America without even leaving a note." "(Sighs)" "Then he reconsidered, a note would be good, outlining what a controlling bitch she was, how patient he'd been, and how much he'd suffered." "CONNIE ON PHONE:" "Hello, Hector?" "Hi." "How's it going?" "Where are you?" "Why, where are you?" "In the backyard." "I've been looking everywhere for you." "Uh, I'm just inside." "I'll, uh... be out in a minute." "♪ LOUD ROCK MUSIC ♪" "BILAL:" "Mate, you look like you're gonna smash someone." "Dance with me?" "Huh?" "Actually, mate, I might serve out some snags." "Ah, pussy." "(Connie laughs)" "Rip it up, Hector." "Come on, get into it, then, hey?" "I might sit this one out." "Oh, weak." "Hector!" "Hector!" "(It's too loud, it's too loud.)" "You wanted something up-tempo." "Don't embarrass me." "Do my best." "Hey." "Hi." "Can you grab me one?" "Thanks." "So, um..." "Brought your boyfriend?" "Richie?" "Yeah." "(Laughs) He's not my boyfriend." "What is he, then?" "He's just someone I brought along so that I'd have someone to talk to." "You've got me to talk to." "Were you jealous?" "What do you think?" "Richie's waiting for his beer." "GARY:" "Heroin dealers made a demand, does that make it OK?" "ANOUK:" "It's just television, Gary." "It's absolute bullshit." "Hey, Hector, Hector." "You tell us, is Anouk wasting her time or what?" "Hey?" "Anouk on that stupid soap opera?" "She's wasting her talent, right?" "Uh..." "I think she's got a lot of talent." "She could do a lot of different things if she wanted to." "Actually, she's already started on a novel." "Shut up, Rhys." "Really?" "Wow." "Well, I don't read too many books, but you know what, I like that show." "What do you like about it?" "Sometimes you just want to veg out to something, you know?" "That's all you want sometimes." "And you're very good in it, Rhys." "How... how is he good in that?" "He is good in it." "He is." "Last year, in those scenes where you were accused of murder," "I really believed you were innocent." "So that's great." "Oh, thank you." "'You shot a man in Vermont, hey, just to watch him die.'" "Ha, ha, ha, ha..." "I don't get it." "It's a line from a Johnny Cash song." "I still don't get it." "Well, I'm just acknowledging the tortured artist in our midst." "Gary's a tortured artist too." "One of our most tortured." "Well, I'm a labourer and you know that." "Oh, that's just his day job." "Really he's a painter." "A visual artiste." "Come on, guys." "Let's not argue, we all gotta work." "I mean, you know, Rhys is an actor," "Harry's a mechanic, I push paper, what are you gonna do?" "Hey?" "(Speaks Greek)" "What was that?" "Hey?" "I said what did you just say?" "I was just saying that some malaka needs to make a speech." "Hey!" "(Clapping, cheering) Speech!" "Hey, everyone, it's speech time!" "Come out." "Boys, come over here for a second." "(Wolf-whistling)" "Today my cousin Hector turns 40." "GUESTS:" "Woo-hoo!" "MANOLIS:" "Yeah, bravo." "That is, of course, the reason for this great spread that you see here today, all this beautiful food, the wonderful hospitality." "Thank you, Hector." "And thank you, Aisha." "(Cheering and clapping)" "OK, now, um..." "I'll try and keep it short." "I'm not very good at these things." "Hector's the brains in this family." "(Burps)" "(Laughter) MANOLIS:" "Oh, Hectora." "Oh, that's gross!" "He's the... he's the charmer." "He's the charmer around here." "(Laughter)" "Oh, God." "This guy here, this malaka, I've known him all my life." "He's more like a brother to me than a cousin." "He's a good man." "Right, and I'll tell you why he's a good man 'cause these two people right here." "Theo Manoli and Thea Koula." "The love and the support that they've given Hector," "I think that's the reason why he's such a good husband and such a good father." "And, of course, because of Aisha, as well, right?" "(Cheering)" "I know the wogs can bust your balls." "Yep." "But I'm glad you hung in there because..." "I don't know, he was going a bit, uh... (Laughs) He was going a bit weird before he met you." "Blame university, mate." "Oh, I do, mate, don't you worry." "But thank God he met Aisha, right?" "GUESTS:" "Yeah!" "Thanks for straightening him out." "Hey, look at you two..." "(Speaks Greek)" "Are they not the most gorgeous couple you've seen, or what?" "Hey?" "GUESTS:" "Yeah." "Come on!" "ALL:" "Yeah!" "I just want to propose a toast." "Everyone lift your glasses, please." "Hector, long life." "Me yia." "Congratulations." "OK?" "Na ta ekatostisis." "I love you, bro." "Happy birthday, Hector!" "ALL:" "Happy birthday." "(Chattering) Happy birthday." "Happy birthday." "Make a speech." "Just jump up." "Jump up." "Speech!" "Speech!" "Thank you, Harry." "Um..." "You're dead right." "I do owe everything to Mum and Dad." "Hugo." "Darling." "Hugo!" "Their support over the years..." "Don't pull those out of the garden." "And, of course, uh, and, uh..." "Aisha, she's supported me." "Don't pull the flowers up." "Wouldn't be here..." "Don't do that." "Listen, listen." "You know what you're doing?" "(Screams) No!" "Digging up the garden bed, mate." "Come here." "NO!" "Like Harry said, I'm a lucky guy." "So I just want to thank everyone for coming, and please..." "Eat, drink and enjoy yourselves." "(Cheering)" "Cheers, Hector." "Happy birthday, Hector." "I want booby." "Hold on, my sweet." "Give it back!" "Give it back!" "(Kids yell indistinctly) Give it back!" "It's mine!" "DAD!" "Dad!" "That's the controller!" "What, what now?" "I let him join in, just like you said, and now he's broken it." "He's smashed it on purpose." "Alright, alright." "He's young, guys." "He's impatient to play with you boys." "(Hugo cries) It's alright, darling." "What's going on, Rocco?" "He just lost it because he wasn't winning." "Rocco!" "This is so fucking unfair." "Rocco!" "Go in Adam's room, now!" "Come on, out here!" "Into his room." "Is he going to be punished?" "Because I would be if I did this." "Come here." "Sorry your controller got broken, but Hugo's not my son." "But I am." "(Hugo cries)" "HUGO:" "I wanted to play with it and they didn't let me play with it." "Five." "(Laughing) I don't believe you." "(All speak indistinctly)" "It's time these kids got some exercise." "Oh, initiative!" "That's good to see." "About time." "Richie, right?" "Could you help me out and organise a game of cricket for these kids?" "They're climbing the walls." "Not really a cricket sort of guy." "As long as they're out of the house." "I'll save that for you." "OK, guys." "You are with Richie here." "He's gonna teach you all some mad cricket skills." "Right, mate?" "I appreciate it." "Have fun, guys." "ALL:" "Yay!" "Play hard." "(Sighs) Now, who's batting?" "Me, me!" "Alright, I'll bowl." "Ready?" "Do you want one?" "No, no." "Giving up, remember?" "Are you sure?" "Yeah, you go ahead." "(Sighs)" "(Chuckles)" "OK, Hugo, remember if you hit the ball and someone catches it, you're out." "(Laughs hysterically)" "SHAMIRA:" "Come on, Hugo!" "Smash 'em!" "Listen, I don't really wanna put my kid through a private school." "OK?" "GARY:" "So you're saying that everyone has to be able to afford this kind of money to put 'em in good education..." "I owe him the best education..." "If I'd known it was your birthday, I would've got you a present." "But it's really tomorrow, isn't it, so I can still get you something." "I want you, that's what I want." "Yes, he's out!" "No!" "He's out!" "LBW!" "(Kids cheer)" "He doesn't know what that means." "I don't care." "He's gotta follow the rules." "No, I'm not out!" "Give me the bat." "No." "Hugo." "Give him the bat, mate." "You're out." "Come over here, I'll explain." "Hugo, give me the bat." "No!" "Hugo, please." "Hugo, give me the bat, please." "Hugo, put the bat down!" "Give me the bat." "Put the bat down." "You're out." "NO!" "Get away, Rocco!" "Hugo, put it down." "Hey!" "Hey!" "That's enough!" "OK?" "No more!" "You understand?" "Argh!" "Hey!" "You... fuckin' animal!" "Come here!" "You touch my kid!" "(Shouting) I just did what he deserves!" "He deserved it, mate!" "You're finished!" "(Shouting)" "Alright!" "Let's all go inside." "I don't blame him, though!" "I blame his pisspot dad..." "Harry!" "No!" "That is abuse!" "That is child abuse!" "Echi pyi poli." "You fucking pig!" "What don't you speak in English, huh?" "It's nothing, mate." "OK?" "Just relax." "Well, say it in English!" "I don't want to cause you any more trouble." "I'm not scared of this faggot." "You fucking monster!" "I'm gonna leave for him." "Stop it!" "You are gone, mate." "You are gone!" "You are finished!" "Alright, that's it." "I want everyone's numbers." "Hector knows everybody..." "I'm calling the cops." "Listen to me!" "Let us take our children home, please." "Does he hit you too?" "Does he?" "Does that animal hit you too?" "Does he?" "Huh?" "You pig!" "AISHA:" "Listen to me." "Listen, listen." "I've got everyone's details." "Let's go inside, forget about this and go home." "Sandi's right, you take the children home." "Let's just get everyone inside." "(Hugo cries)" "(Speaks Greek)" "It's OK." "It's OK." "Let's go and see Rosie." "Let's go and see Hugo." "Let's go and find them." "OK." "You alright, mate?" "Rosie?" "Anouk said she'll drive you home whenever you're ready to go." "Good." "I just want to get out of this house." "(Whimpers)" "If there's anything I can do, anything at all, let me know, OK?" "(Sobs)" "I can't believe he hit that little child." "What kind of an arsehole can do that?" "Connie." "It's bad enough people hitting their own children." "Connie, please." "This, uh..." "This thing we've been doing," "I'm really sorry if I've been leading you on, but we've got to stop now." "Do you understand?" "Do you understand?" "Of course I understand you." "Look, I think you're very special, but I love Aisha." "Don't you know I do as well?" "I hate what we're doing." "It's disgusting." "OK." "So, to protect Aisha, it's best if we never say anything about this again." "OK?" "Don't worry." "This thing's so twisted, I wouldn't want anyone to know ever." "I mean, we..." "Nothing really happened between us." "So disgusting, and old and weird-looking." "I just don't know why you bothered inviting me." "(Sighs)" "(Groans and breathes heavily)" "(Sighs)" "(Grunts and breathes heavily)" "SHAMIRA:" "Thank you for lunch." "It was beautiful." "I think mine are asleep in the car anyway..." "Lucky you." "Yeah." "See you later." "(Sighs)" "Hector!" "I am really sorry." "Christ, you scared the shit out of me." "Sorry, it..." "It's just this whole thing with Hugo." "I didn't mean it." "I don't know anything about cricket..." "Slow down, mate." "Slow down." "It wasn't your fault, honestly, mate." "Can't stop thinking, if that little boy's traumatised or something?" "Nothing's happened, and it wouldn't be your fault even if it had." "It's all good, honestly." "It's good." "Um..." "Can I do something?" "I could help clean..." "No, no, mate." "Go home, go out, whatever you were planning on doing." "Leave the cleaning up to us old farts." "Alright." "OK." "(Sighs)" "Hey, Aish." "Thanks, you did good, hosing that one down." "Oh, is that how you see it?" "A little squirt of water, spot fire, it's all OK?" "No." "No, I just meant that, you know..." "Got pretty heated out there." "Jesus." "Your cousin hit a child in our house." "Of course it got heated!" "OK, but there are two sides to it, Aish." "If we're gonna argue, I want the children in bed." "I'm not arguing." "Can you put them to bed, please?" "It's nine o'clock!" "Can you do this one thing?" "You alright?" "Want to talk?" "No, I'm good." "OK." "I don't know if they're asleep, but they're in bed." "Before you say anything, I'm sick of everyone excusing that man." "Because he's your fucking cousin, thinks he can get away with murder!" "I agree with you, Aisha." "Harry shouldn't have hit the boy." "You say anything to end a fight." "He was wrong, pure and simple, and I shouldn't have defended him, OK?" "I'm so sorry that your party got all fucked up." "I mean, you put so much work in, it just wasn't fair." "And I'll sort the Greece thing out tomorrow, I promise." "Well..." "Yeah, maybe I'll talk to Brendan first, about the dates, and see if we can arrange something." "Yeah." "Alright." "(Sighs)" "Want that valium now?" "No, I don't want the fucking valium." "Ooh." "(Laughs)" "The kids won't be asleep yet." "Oh, we'll be quiet." "No, we won't!" "(Squeals and giggles)" "(Grunts)" "(Moans)" "(Sighs)" "Yeah, I understand." "I just..." "I thought that maybe you'd want to sleep first and then clear your head." "Rosie, how do you think I feel something like that happening to you in our house?" "Yeah, yeah, you know I will." "Do whatever you need." "NARRATOR:" "Hector was an atheist, but he thanked God anyway for all that had happened that afternoon." "The slap had saved him from a disastrous mistake." "A mistake which he would have forever regretted." "(Sighs) It's my last one." "Really." "Rosie's called the police." "She says they're gonna press charges." "Shit." "Pff." "It's after midnight." "♪ Happy birthday. ♪ (Chuckles)" "(Chuckles)" "(Coughs and laughs)" "Wow." "I want you to be kinder to Adam." "I won't be so hard on him." "Promise I'll change." "♪ LOUIS ARMSTRONG:" "Someday You'll Be Sorry ♪" "♪ Mmm, someday ♪" "♪ You'll be sorry ♪" "♪ The way you treated me was wrong... ♪" "So did Aisha ask you to make a statement?" "I've already said I don't want to be involved." "Well, you're Rosie's friend, you should tell them what you saw." "Frankly, I don't want to tell anybody what I saw yesterday." "That was a horrible day, I can't stop thinking about it." "Been pretty horrible for Aisha." "No-one deserves to be hit, let alone a child!" "Well, we all wanted to slap Hugo that day!" "How can you defend that man?" "I'm not defending anybody!" "Know what really freaks a kid out, Mum?" "Telling him that he might be carrying the breast cancer gene when they don't even have any breasts yet." "Well, we're Ashkenazi, we do carry it." "You OK?" "I'm just tired." "If I was your age, you know..." "I don't see what age has to do with it." "You know what?" "Cross that concern off your list 'cause I quit!" "You can't quit, you're on contract!" "Just watch me!" "Closed Captions by CSI, MemoryOnSmells"