" Oh hey, look, desert." "And more desert." "The , 10 meters up on the right." "Here come left." " Coming left." " Fuck, there's another one!" "Come right, come right!" " Almost lost one!" " Look, look, look, look, look, look!" " Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,." "Whoo!" " Woo!" "Woo!" " I say they walk the plank." "They walk the plank." " Walk the plank to the lake!" "To the lake!" "Ah!" "Ah!" " Boom, boom!" "Get him in the lake." " Don't worry, I won't do it." " Get him in there!" " Whoa!" " I win!" "Boom!" "Come on, old man!" "You're sleeping in the cave tonight!" "Come on" " Almost there." "Come on." " Oh god." " Oh, you crampin' up them muscles?" " Not a god damn fish!" " Clearly." "What stroke was that?" " It's the black stroke, you little bastard." "Huh?" "Get over here." " Alright, alright, alright." "Too much suction, too much suction!" "Little Jack Johnson, huh?" "That better?" " Yes." " Yeah." " Much better." " I just didn't realize it was a shared plan." " I mean we've been talking about it for like a couple of months now." "Then we'll do the surgeries, and then I'll do his pt." " Sounds fantastic." " Yeah, I mean you know, we'll probably have to start out small, but eventually we want to do professional athletes, and police and firefighters, you know?" " Well it sounds like a solid plan to me," "Mr. 1,500." " Ooh, that's Mr. 1,520, to you." "Tim got the 1,500." " I have to measure 1,520." " Hey." "Remember that time you were jealous 'cause your sat score was lower than mine?" " Fuck you." " Hey, I ever show you guys a campfire bomb?" " No." "No, no thanks." " One, two, three!" " Now I can roast my marshmallow." " Where you go?" " Ben!" " Tim!" " Where you at?" " I watched it fly right into the world trade center." "And it was flying really low and going incredibly fast." "I could hear the engine." "I've never seen anything like this." "It just plants this side of the building." " Ben, what's up?" " Something's wrong, i need to talk to Tim." " What's going on?" " Turn on the TV." "You'll see there's been like an accident, or something." " Tim, can you come out in the hallway please?" " What's up, man?" " Where's your dad today?" " Um, I don't know." "What's today?" " Today's Tuesday." " He just flipped it so he wouldn't miss any of my games." "So Tuesdays and Thursdays he's in the city." "Why?" " Crashed into the world trade center." "Apparently there is very little information available, but we do have Kelly bolicky on the phone who saw the events unfold." "Kelly, can you hear me?" " Hey which, which tower is that?" " Shock right now, but I came out" " Ben man, which one is that?" " And i heard this explosion." "Then people started" " No!" " You okay right now" " No!" " Mom!" "Mom!" "Mom!" "Hey!" "Where are you?" " No, no, no, don't, don't." " Hey, guys." "This just isn't supposed to be the way it happens." "There's just so much that I never got to-- when I tried going down the stairs, but there wasn't any stairs." "Tim, there's so much that i never got to teach you." "That I never got to show you." "Know that I'm proud of you." "So proud of you." "Son, you'll make a great man, one day." "Sweetheart, Annie, I'm so sorry." " I can graduate early, if I want." "At least, that's what Ms. henshaw said." "14-5." "I'm up." "If I do that, I can enlist by February." " What about basketball?" "And prom, and college?" " None of that shit matters, man." " Let's do it, man." "Fuck this place." " Wait, really?" " Yeah." " What about your med school?" " I'll be a medic." "There's always gonna be sick people, right?" "They'll be here when we get back." "We'll go in for a couple of years!" "Win the war!" " Kick some fucking ass!" " Not like we're gonna miss anything here, anyways." " We're gonna miss the apple festival." " Dude, I don't even like apples." "Hurt my teeth." "Hook shot!" "Come on!" " Oh!" " Alrighty, you get it now." "Get that now." "Huh, you ticklish?" "Yeah, yeah?" " Dinner!" " Shh, shh, shh." "You know what, you know what?" "Here we go." "Dinnertime." " Here you go, sweetie." "Got it?" "Is that enough to start?" "It's good." "Why don't you help yourself to that?" " What's for dinner?" " It's called whisky fish." "I ran out of white wine, so I used whisky." "It's good." "Try it." "It'll be good." "Take some rice." "What are you thinkin' about, Ben?" "Benny?" "What you thinkin' about?" " Nothin'." " A-1 today." " No, 7-16." " Well, better than usual." " Yeah." " And how long do we have to do that for?" " Tim, we haven't seen her for four months." "I'm just asking for one night of your time." " I know, but can't she come here?" " Why, what's the problem?" " Well, for starters, the whole place smells like mothballs." "Mom, they're in her pantry." " It is a little disgusting." " They're in the refrigerator." " They are not." " Yes they are." "They roll around inside the door when you open it." "I swear to-- what's wrong?" " It's okay, leave it." "Leave it." " Yeah." "We both were." " Infantry?" " Yeah, I was hoping to be a medic." " Okay, couple things." "We don't have medics." "Navy gives us corpsman." "Guys, you can do anything you want." "You could be nbc specialists, intelligence specialists, helicopter pilots." " No, the infantry is what we want." " Okay." "I'll work with you guys." "There's something called a buddy program." "You'll both go to boot together, that's all I can guarantee ya." "From there, your best bet's to go infantry." "Excel." "Try out for recon." "You want to be the tip of the spear, that's how you do it." "You will deploy, and you will kill bad guys." " Nope, absolutely not." "No." " Why?" " Ugh, okay I got the whites in the-  you have to sign this." " I'm not signing anything." " Josh is asleep, okay?" "Now what's going on?" " Ask your son." " My son?" " Yeah, your son." " Ben?" " I'm 17, so I need parental permission to join the marines." " Okay." " Guys, I've been talking about this since like September." " What brought this on?" " We went to the recruiter's office today." " You went to the recruiters today?" " Why do you keep asking me the same questions just over and over again?" "It's not gonna change my answer." " Don't talk to us like that." " Yes, I went to the recruiter's office today." " Okay look, you're frustrated." "I get that." "You made it perfectly clear." "Ben, you've gotta see this from our perspective." " And what's the problem?" "You went to war." "Look, I just wanna be there for my friend, okay?" "His dad was killed." "He was fucking murdered." " Watch your mouth." " What's the problem?" "'Cause I'm willing to risk my life sp Josh doesn't have to grow up with this?" "Yeah, I'm a real dirtbag." " No, you're our little boy." "And I'm not gonna bury you, too." "You're 17 years old." "What if something happened to you?" "I'm not doing this right now." " What's the problem?" " I'm scared!" " You could get hurt." "Or worse, you could die." "Ben, you're gonna have to kill people." "Do you think that's not gonna affect you?" "Who are you gonna become when you watch somebody die because of something that you did?" "I mean we love you, buddy." "Right now, you-- but what if somebody else comes home?" " I'll be fine." "What?" "I need to do this." "I have to be there for him." "I gave him my word." " I know." "I know." " I'm gonna do it." "It's just a matter of now, or in eight months." " What?" "This country is worth defending." " Oh." "That's what he's doing, huh?" "Do you remember how messed up you were when you came back?" "Have you forgotten that?" "You know, you have to tell him, okay?" "At the very least, you have to tell him." " Alright." " Dedicated it to you." "I ran 2,000 yards." "I'm sorry." "I miss you." " Up in there." "Got this." "Ah, rookie." "Listen, Ben." "I don't like to talk about this, but when I was drafted," "they put me in a helicopter and they told me to shoot anything that wasn't wearing green." "I did." "To this day, I don't know why I killed those people." "You need to make your own decisions." "Before you pull the trigger, you need to be able to look yourself in the mirror, and say why you're doin' it." "And that you believe in it." " It's fucking weird, not playing this season." " Yeah, it's bullshit, coach won't let you play." " Nah." "I understand." "I mean, I'm not gonna be here for half the games anyway." "Wrong of me to even try out like that." " Yeah, why didn't you wait 'til after after basketball season?" " I don't know." "I guess I just didn't think about it." "But in the scheme of things, what's more important?" "Couple high school basketball games, or the war?" " You were gettin' looks from colleges." " Easy decision, bro." "Easy decision." " Your mom still bein' a bitch about that paperwork?" "Man, I'm right behind you." "I mean one way or another, i turn 18 in August." " I know, man." "It's not your fault." "We're gonna kick some fucking ass." "Don't you worry about it." "Shoot the fucking ball." " So um, you, you know, watch out for yourself." " I will." " Take care of yourself, really." " I will, I will" " okay." " Don't you worry about me." " Okay." " Alright." " Say goodbye, sweetie." " I'll see ya, buddy." "You take care of her." "We'll write to you." " Perfect." " Come here." "You come back." "Okay?" "We got a tradition to maintain every summer." " You know I will." " I'm gonna miss you." " Thanks, man." "See ya, buddy." " I'm right behind you." " Hey Ben!" "It's five months, man!" "Five months 'til you graduate." " Fuck!" " Benny, are you okay?" " I'm fine." " Look, if you want to yell, then go ahead." "We understand that you're mad, and you have a right to be." "You can be mad." " And what's there to be mad about?" "'Cause you won't let me be there for my friend?" "Won't let me serve my country?" " Okay, we will." "As much as it kills us to think about you getting hurt, or worse, we're prepared to sign the papers when you graduate." " I'll do whatever you want." " You continue to apply to colleges, and you seriously think about the rotc." " Done." " This hurts us, but we don't want to stand in your way." "You know, we just wanna make sure that you really thought this through." " Hello?" " Hey, Josh!" " Tim!" " Hey, buddy!" " You want to talk to my brother Benny?" " Yes, that would be awesome." " Ben, Tim's on the phone." "Ben, Tim's on the phone." " Hey, man!" " Say Ben, what's up?" " Same shit, man." "How's boot camp?" " Fuckin' sucks!" "But I crushed it, bro." "Thank god it's family day." "Feels like I haven't slept in 53 days." " Oh yeah, not that you're counting, right?" " Oh and dude?" "The fucking guys down here, they are scary." "One of 'em asked me who the commander of chief was." "I told him it was the king of all native Americans." " Your picture looks really good there, Josh." " Hey!" " Hi!" " Oh, hey guys." "How are you?" " Good." "How are you?" " I'm good." " So, what's for dinner?" " Benny!" " Oh, what's this?" "Dear Benjamin, we're pleased to announce you've been accepted to northeastern university." "Please see attach-  yes!" " For important financial worksheets." " Oh!" "Congratulations." " What does that mean?" " Benny got into college." " Yay, Benny doesn't have to go away!" " Oh." " Shh." " Here, let me get that." " Brick!" "Say, Ben!" " Hey." "Nice hat." " Alright, fuck you." "It's cold up here." " What's up, man?" " What's goin' on?" "Your dad said I'd catch you here, man." "Yeah, I got a few days of leave, and then I fucking deploy." " Damn, that's quick." " Yeah." "Some unit had a group of guys get in trouble a few months back, so they got no choice but to take me and a few others from soi." "But hey, sure beats sitting' in my barracks listen to the other guy in my rack beat off above me." " Oh, fuck." " It's cool, he never lasts that long." " What?" "Some rotc recruiter guy came by the school and a bunch of guys signed that letter of interest thing." " Yeah, a bunch of pussies need a back-up plan 'cause they're soft." "Tryin' to get something out of it." "So what's goin' on since I've been gone?" " Teachers, they don't know what to do with us." "Nobody does their homework, and you know." " Homework?" "That's so weird." " Yeah." "Everybody's already gotten into college, you know?" " Yeah, where's everyone goin'?" " Well your ex got rejected." " Good." "She's a fucking whore." " Okay." "Bobby lachey's goin' to Harvard." " Smart bastard." " Joe is goin' to westfield." " Of course he's goin' to westfield." "His grandfather went there, his father went there, his fucking kids are gonna go to westfield." "Shit." " Yeah." "I got in." "Got a scholarship, too." " Okay." "What does that mean?" " Nothin'." "I mean that was the deal, you know?" "I apply to college, my dad sign the papers." "Three more months 'til I graduate." " Yeah, I better get going." "Mom's making Shepherd's pie." "I'll see ya." " Dig a little hole." "Let's go, form up,." "okay, we're approaching our target." "Everybody watch your sectors." "We're gonna move in a wedge formation to the south side of that mountain." "Let's head out." " Take cover!" "Cover me!" " Take cover!" "Go!" " In position!" "Move!" " Oh fuck." "Oh shit." " Coming!" "Coming!" " I got this." "Go!" "You're gonna be alright, buddy." "I'll take care of ya." "Are you hit anywhere else?" " Ammo discipline!" " He shot" " Move out!" "Get him behind cover!" " Come on!" "He sees me!" "Come down!" "I'm up!" "Down!" "I'm up!" " In position!" "Move!" " Don't have a clear shot!" "Take that fucker out!" " Is target neutralized!" " Esty!" "Go make sure that target is down!" "Esty!" " If you were a chick, you'd have a pretty nice ass." " Hey esty, how long you been back there thinkin' about that?" " Heh, for the last five miles." " Sounds like four and a half miles too long." "You know what?" "Go ahead and put that on the list of shit you can't say to me anymore." " Aye-aye, sergeant." " Ben,." "Ben, Ben." "I love you." "It's alright." " This is bullshit." " Better down here than up there." " I don't like this." " We've been scoutin' for seven hours." "Seven miles out." "The hajis are all up in the mountains." "Fucking huge, man!" "Blister on my big toe so big" "I think it's got a fucking face." " Esty, let me check my big book of I don't give a shit, and see if that blister on your big toe is in there." "Yup, hey it's right there." "Right next to your jock itch and erectile dysfunction." " Oh whoa, whoa, whoa." "It wasn't erectile dysfunction." "I have poor circulation." " Poor circulation." "I'll be sure to tell that to my wife the next time i" " Hi." "Listen." "Just keep trying." "We don't give up." "Now, chop me some ship." "Get in there." "Oh, after you're done, can you get your father, please?" " Yo, pop!" "Pop." " I refuse to answer to that." " Pop!" " What?" " Dinner." " Stop calling me that." " Calling you what?" " Pop." "God, you're making me feel so old with that pop shit." " Which is exactly why he does it." "You're just encouraging him." " Oh, this smells delicious." "Oh, hey." "You don't know what you got here, kid." "This broad's a gem." "Hey you remember your mom's cooking." " Oh, recipes are merely a suggestion, not a requirement." " Yeah, she was certainly creative." " As long as you have barbecue sauce, it was okay." " Hah!" "Barbecue sauce and ranch dressing." "They were a whole food group." "That's probably why you already got that high blood pressure, huh?" " Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's because of your shitty genes." " Shitty genes, me?" " Okay, sit, sit, sit." "It's ready." "Hey, hey, hey, hey." "Light on peppers, go." "Some peppers." " Hmm, no." "That's enough." " At least two." " God damn calorie gestapo." " Did you take your pills?" "They're on your nightstand." " Okay, okay, okay." " And the surgeon just starts sawing into this guy's leg with what was essentially a chainsaw." "I mean no warning whatsoever." "There was blood and bone chips shooting everywhere." " I was taking bone out of his hair when he came home." " The last thing I remember i was trying to swallow that hot spit you get right before you throw up, and then just, wham!" "My head hits the floor." "Oh, I mean when I finally did regain consciousness," "I was sitting in a wheelchair in the middle of a hallway." "Imagine opening your eyes, and the first thing you see is this guy wearing his hospital gown backwards-  ew." " And he just looks at you, and he says, do you know how we got here?" " Oh no!" " Which way is the bathroom?" " Oh, I'll go with you." " Tim?" " Yeah." " I didn't know you were home." " No?" " We should, we should get together some time, catch up." "It's been awhile." " You know I got every one of those letters you sent me?" "There's a reason you never got a response." " That's bullshit, and you know it." "I mean you know exactly why he told me to fuck off." "And you know, I deserve it." "I deserve worse." "I mean I fucking promised him." "I should've just" " Ben, you didn't believe in it, okay?" "It wasn't you-  but I gave him my word." " You were 17!" " I did believe in it!" "Was I just scared?" " I don't know." "You know, maybe you stopped believing in it." "Listen, you hate how the military is used." "You say it all the time." " This thing's just so fucked up, and there's no fixing it." "I mean what did i think was gonna happen?" "I'm so fucking stupid." " Ben, you're not stupid." " No, I'm worse." " Hmph." " Catch much, pop?" " Hey, if I wanted any of your lip," "I'd unzip my pants." " That is gross." " Remember when you said that to your kindergarten teacher?" "Mrs. umm-  oh, Mrs. pinkum." " God." "Your mother was mortified." " Yeah, you really let me go down with the ship on that one." " Well that's." "Yeah well I had to, pal." "She would've crucified me." " You know what, this is good." "You've been cooped up in that house ever since mom died." "It's" " I'm sellin' the cabin, Ben." "Ben..." "That place..." "It's her." "She picked out the doorknobs." "I just can't do it." "I'm gonna go up there." "I'm gonna pack some things." "I'm gonna close the house down," "I'm gonna put a sign out front." "Hey, you're coming with me." " Dad, I got so much stuff goin' on, and with layoffs at Lily's" " I already talked to her." "Yeah, you're coming with me." " Alright." " Just make sure you're there in case he needs to talk." " We're goin' to the cabin." "He loves it up there." "He's gonna be fine." " He hasn't been there since your mom passed away." " I know." " Just promise me you'll keep an eye on him." " Lill, he's my dad." "Okay?" "I got this." "Gonna be fun." " Nothin', I just wanted to get on the road sooner." " Oh, okay." "Well bye." "Love you." " I love you, too." " You sure old susie's gonna make it?" " Oh, I already offered." "He does not want to take the car." " Yeah, don't worry." "She's got one more trip in her." "Hey susie and I have been through a lot worse than a quick trip to Maine." " How long a drive is it?" " 10 hours." " Is there cell service?" "How will I know you got there safe?" " That's the fun of it." "Now don't worry." "We'll be back in three days." " I'll let you know when we get to Portland, and then again when we're on our way home." " Keep him safe." " I will." " I didn't know you were coming." " I'm here for your father." " Hey, he's here." "We're all here." "That's all that matters." " oh!" "I forgot how long of a drive this was." " It's 574 beautiful miles." " Pull over." "I gotta take a piss." " So you gonna tell me what the deal is?" " No deal." "Just thought I'd ask him to come along." " Yeah, this is gonna be fun." " Seat belts." " Hey!" "Hey!" "I'm up." "Hey, hey, hey knock it off!" "I didn't live through two tours to die in the middle of butt-fuck Maine!" " Now we're in business!" " No, no, no, no!" "Cut this shit out!" "Fucking hilarious." " Oh, stop being a pussy!" " how far out are we?" " About 100 miles." " Oh, that's fucking great." "This truck bed's real fucking" " smell that?" "There's nothing like that." "Now you guys grab the bags out of the truck, bring the fishing poles." "I'm gonna go throw the boat in the lake." " Want a hand?" " Fuck you." "I'm old, I'm not dead." " you remember that time you got the hook stuck in your thumb?" " Oh man, I got myself pretty good." " We were all bent outta shape after that." " I was bleedin' like a stuck pig!" " You remember what you said?" " No." " You wrap that shit in duct tape." "You said, better than stitches." " Well yeah, it turns out it wasn't better than stitches." "Left me with a pretty good scar." " You use duct tape for all sorts of shit out there." "Saved our sorry asses more than a couple times." "What?" " Nothing." " Didn't sound like nothing." " Whoa." " You got something?" " No." "You're making this awkward." "You both got great, big veiny dicks, okay?" "Let's just fish." " Big?" "Jesus." " Hi." "Whoa, that's what I call a successful day, huh?" " Yeah." " Oh no, after you, our resident angler, huh?" "Oh, excellent." "Well now we're in business." "Cutting board." "What do we got here?" "What the fuck?" "You call this a keeper?" "What?" " It's pitch black out there." "It felt way bigger than that." " Yeah, that's what she said." " To who?" " Mm, there's not enough here to make a fish stick!" "Gentlemen!" "Tonight we dine like kings!" " I had no idea." " Her grandfather was a bush pilot." "Flew her up to moosehead lake when she was a little girl." "She wanted to share that with me." " How did you end up here?" " Oh, the directions were 20 years old, and so faded, you could barely read 'em." "We drove around for hours." "God, she got us so lost." "And then, then we found this dilapidated cabin." "No electricity, no water." "But she knew that was where we were meant to spend our honeymoon." "She knew it." "Only cost $14,000." "So we broke in that night, spent the night on the floor, and we bought it the next day." "Your father and I, we built that back section when you and Ben were born." "But that first week, that was the happiest time of my life." "So simple." "I'm hungry." "Who's hungry?" "Oh!" "Oh." " Pop!" "Morning." " What time is it?" " Like, 10." " No shit." "How long has he been out there?" " Oh, I shoulda gotten up." "Dad!" "Dad!" "Dad!" "Dad!" "Dad, dad!" " Hey slow down, slow down." "I'll go to the other side." "Go, go, go!" "Alright, Ben!" "Ben." "Ben." "Grab my hand." " No, no, no, no!" " Ben, Ben, grab my hand." "Over here, over here." "Grab his head, grab his head!" "Pull him back, come on!" "Come on!" "On his back, on his back." "You know cpr?" "Okay, I'll do three minutes, then you." "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten," "11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30." "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, come on!" "Come on, come on not today, old man!" "Come on!" "Today's not your day!" "Come on!" "28, 29, 30!" "Go breathe, breathe!" "Breathe, breathe!" "Good, good, good, good, good!" " Somebody!" "Somebody help us!" " Breathe, breathe." "It's been two hours, Ben." "Ben!" " Six, seven, eight, nine, ten." " Ben, he's gone-  don't stop!" "Keep going!" " He's gone." " Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten." " Hey!" " What do you want to do?" "We need to do something." "It's been three hours." "Things are gonna start to happen." " I know." " Put him in the truck?" "Drive to the nearest hospital." "Want to tie it down?" "I just don't want it sliding around." " Just get in the truck." "No!" "No!" "Fuck!" " Alright, what's your plan here?" " I'm gonna walk." " Okay great, now let's think this through." " What's wrong with you?" "He's dead, Tim!" "My dad just died." " Yeah I know, I was here." " Do you even know what this is like?" "I mean can you be human for one second?" " We need to think this through." "That's 175 pounds." "We're at least 100 miles from any kind of help." "We don't have the gear, the supplies, or the manpower to carry him that far." " I'll take care of it." " No, you'll end up dead from dehydration or exhaustion." "Then you become my problem." "Ben, your arm's already shaking." "You haven't even reached the end of the driveway." " Don't worry about us!" "We'll be fine." " No!" "You won't be fine!" "What you're trying to do cannot be done!" "Better men have tried, and failed!" " Then help me." " I'm trying to." " What is wrong with you?" " He was old." "I'm sorry." "He had a great run." "Shit, he went out on top!" "Heart attack in paradise!" "I can come up with a lot worse ways to go!" "Sorry I'm not so broken up about it, but this, this is the world I'm very fucking familiar with." " Oh, you're such an asshole." " Why?" "'Cause I'm here for him, and not you?" "I loved the guy, man." "I really did." "I wouldn't be here if it weren't for him." "Not a chance in hell!" "Really though, what'd you expect?" " My friend!" "I expected my friend!" "Where's that guy?" " Dead." "You left that guy." "And he died in some shit hole in the middle of the desert." "I'm right behind you!" "You remember that?" "That guy held his real best friend's hand while he bled out from a shrapnel wound that tore his body to pieces!" "He lied to him!" "Told him he was gonna be okay while he bled out!" "Try being human after that!" "You ever felt someone's hopes and dreams leave their body?" "Held their hand as their skin turned gray?" "And they shit themselves?" "Where were you?" " You never let me apologize." "I've always been sorry." " You fucking should be." "Get the shovels." "Can't leave him inside, and we can't carry him." "It's too far." "It's not a bad view." "You up?" " Yeah." " Let's go." "You're not drinking enough." "Come on last thing we need is you gettin' dehydrated." "Come on." " Enough!" "I'm fine." " Your body needs water." "Simple biology." " I'm not thirsty." " Hey man, just take the water." "What the fuck, man!" "We don't have enough clean water, as it is!" " Then just leave me alone!" " If you get dehydrated," "I won't be able to get us both outta here!" " I don't need you to get me outta here." " Alright, fucking tough guy." " You know, I'm so sick of your macho shit." "Excuse me!" "Ladies and gentlemen!" "But we have a real, genuine, certified bad-ass here." "Fucking congratulations." "You hear that?" "That's the sound of the world not clapping." " You're a fucking prick." " I'm a prick?" " Yeah." "You." "Where do you get off?" "What do you have to be so mad about?" " Everything." " Blowing this out of proportion a bit, don't you think?" " I just buried my father in the dirt!" " And where you goin' now, huh?" "Back home?" "To your wife?" "To your perfect home?" "Your perfect little life?" " You chose not to have those things." " What?" "No, I didn't make that choice!" "I didn't get to!" " Please, are you fucking serious?" " Yes, I'm fucking serious." "No one chooses to watch their friends die." "You think I choose to hear them when I close my eyes?" " You enlisted again." "You chose it." " Where were you?" "I distinctly remember you saying you'd be right behind me!" "Where were you!" "Say it!" " I couldn't do it, man." "I couldn't kill my person for that." " You were afraid." "Maybe you do think it was wrong now, but you were afraid then, and that's why you weren't there." "That's why you feel so guilty." "While you were doing keg stands, and fucking that pretty little girlfriend of yours, you know what I was doing?" " I'm sure you're gonna tell me." " Defending your country." "Protecting this place." "A place you didn't earn." " Then why are you so broken?" " I'm not broken." " I think you can't deal with what you've done, and it fucking kills you." " And what have I done?" " You killed people, man." "You murdered people for something that you didn't believe in." " You think I murdered people?" " What else do you call killing another person for something you don't believe in?" " Oh, please." "All that political bullshit goes right out the window the minute, the fucking second, someone is trying to kill you, or your friends." "I didn't murder them." "I stopped them from killing people I cared about!" "It was us, versus them!" "We just, we just wanted to stay alive, man." "There's no time to think about anything else." " So you save people?" "You're a hero?" " No." "Heroes don't come home." " Man, I should've been there with you, and for that, I'm sorry." "That is my greatest regret." "If I could have that moment back," "I would do it so differently." "But I don't regret not getting pulled into that bullshit." " And you think I do?" " You should!" " You are fucking something else." " What did you expect?" "That I was gonna worship you and thank you for your service?" " I never asked for that." " Huh, does that piss you off?" "That I don't shake your hand, and thank you for everything you sacrificed?" " You got the freedom to say whatever the fuck you want!" " Cut the canned bullshit, man!" "I know you!" " You don't know me." " I know it pisses you off!" "I can see it in your eyes." "I'm an ungrateful fuck." "Sorry if I didn't want to get dragged into that bullshit." " Why don't you tell my dead friends that?" " You volunteered!" "You signed your name down on a piece of paper!" "At what point do you become a willing participant in something that you know is wrong?" " By the time I re-upped, do you really think" "I gave a shit about why we were there?" "I wanted to make sure that the 17 year old kid with a 90 IQ, the guy who joined because he wanted to protect his country got to come back home to his mom and dad." "And if I didn't go, somewhat who wasn't as good as me, would've." " That doesn't justify this killing!" " Do you realize how fucking ridiculous that sounds!" "Soldiers go where you ask us to go!" "We are a tool, a concept you refuse to understand!" " I understand it!" "Do you?" "Or do you just like refuse to process-  awful easy to say coming from the safety of your suburban home, where people aren't killing your friends!" " It's not that simple!" "You put yourself in the situation where you had to kill somebody for something you didn't even believe in!" "I couldn't do that!" "Yeah, I would have trouble sleeping at night, too." " You done?" "Enough Ben!" "I don't want to hurt you!" " Fucker." "I'll fucking kill you." " You're a scrappy mother fucker, aren't you?" " I was fighting for my life." " When I was over there" "I kept turning on the news expecting to see people protesting" "trying to bring us home, you know?" "You know what I saw?" "Survivor, fucking Kardashians." "Did you once try to bring me home?" "Man, I can't sleep at night, and I probably never really will." "While the rest of the country curls up in their Egyptian cotton sheets, and their cozy, gas-heated homes." "And they get to dream about fucking sugarplums." "The price of our way of life is not shared." "I know I'm not a hero." "No sane person comes back from that fucked-up nightmare proud of everything they did." "All I could do was one thing, and that's keep my guys alive." "And I did." " So what now?" "Oh fuck." " Still feels like it's there." "Iud got us in a hum-v." "It was fucking." "Worst part is, I swear I have a huge blister on my big toe!" "But when I looked down, nothing." "No foot, no shin!" "My whole god damn leg is gone!" "I had the coolest fucking tattoo on my calf." "400 bucks fucking wasted." "That shit pissed me off." " So, so go to colleges." "I mean tell your story." "Call out the hypocrites." " Come on, Benson." "A room full of teenagers and listen to them talk about shit they know nothing about?" "No thanks." "These kids were four when 9/11 happened." "It's about as meaningful as saying Pearl harbor, to them." " If you're not gonna tell them, then who will?" " I'm the enemy, man." "I'm the machine." "They'll never hear me even if I did say something." "But you know what i would tell them?" "That it's criminal." "That hero shit." "When a life gets snuffed out like it's nothing." "Imagine growing up so poor where your only chance for a better life requires you to gamble with it." "And for what?" "Free college tuition, or to protect their country?" "Which one is it?" "That is what's fucking criminal." "They don't want to be heroes, man." "They just want a chance." "They want adventure." "Wars destroy lives." "It shreds friendships." "It's not cool, it's not bad-ass, there's no fast cars, no hot chicks." "And all the heroes fucking die." "But you know what i wonder the most?" "Is who I would've been." "You feel good about yourself?" "You beat up a cripple." "A god damn amputee!" " Hey, you remember that time we drove up here with your dad?" " In the back of the pick-up?" " Dude, those puddles were huge!" " Downright dangerous." "We could've been killed before our balls dropped." " Yeah, I'm surprised they did that." " You know, you weren't the only one." "We were all very concerned about those lopsided little guys." "Whatever came of the left one?" " Oh, it's still crooked, and way higher than the other one." " Can you still pull it up inside your body?" " Hell yeah, man!" "Oh, fuck." " Jesus, what happened to your face?" "What's wrong with my face?" "No seriously, what's wrong with my face?" " It looks better than before." "Does anybody even pick up hitchhikers anymore?" " Rapists and murderers, I think." " Perfect." "Just in case."