"PALIN:" "For 50 years after the Second World War" "Sovlet muscle, both military and political, dominated the Baltlc States." "But In 1 99 1 they gained their Independence." "Estonla, Latvla and Llthuanla were now free to live their lives, revive their culture and clear up the mess." "Thls Is Talllnn, capital of Estonla." "From here, I'll be travelling through the Baltlcs south to Kallnlngrad." "When I was last here, 1 6 years ago," "It was an unwelcoming Sovlet republic." "Left to its own devices, Talllnn has boomed." "Estonla has a population not much more than Blrmlngham, and everyone Is doing rather nicely." "I'm driving along the coast to meet some of these newly affluent Estonlans who are trying to come to terms with It all." "The days of Communlst conformity are long gone." "Our hosts, Margus, Evelln and their family," "live In a pyramid." "Evelin, what's it like living inside the pyramid?" "Normally it helps to find the way to do things and the way you really feel and find the power inside you!" "That's like the!" "Like God in you!" "It helps to find God in you," " Because God is!" " God or good?" " God!" " God in you!" " God in you!" "God is everything!" " Hmm!" " I mean, God is like the basic energy!" " Hmm!" "And if you find this God you can!" "You can create whatever!" "Are Estonians particularly interested in spiritual things?" "Many people are searching for spiritual enlightenment and are looking for different practices and how to!" "How to get their life!" "flowing easier and to be happier!" "Llvlng In a pyramid Is clearly not the only way to make your life happier, and tonight friends and neighbours are here to try another approach." "(FLUTES PLAYING)" "At the moment, It mainly Involves staring." "The sun Is at last beginning to set, and Margus, our host, Is making final preparations." "It looks like any summer barbeque but the only difference Is that what's going on this barbeque are the guests." "(DRUM BEATING)" "Margus leads off." "Intrepid ladies follow him." "Some of the men are not so sure." "Why do you think people do this, Margus?" "I think they do that because of the same reason why I do that!" "It gives me good feeling and my heart will be open!" "I know who I am better!" "Is it about!" "Is it about conquering fear?" "Yes!" "Yes!" "To understand that fear, how we can be without fear, we have to bring fear so close if we can, to look what is fear!" "(EXHALES)" " But is it!" "You tell me!" " I have to say," "I feel scared at the moment more than!" " Really?" " Really!" "That's great!" "Really!" "I feel, "0h, what I have to say?" "How can I say?"" "0h, well, excellent!" "You did very well!" "You did very well!" "That was very good!" "It's a curiously emotional evening, though I'm afraid the only things I'll be putting on fires are chestnuts." "Further up the coast are 1 00 concrete suitcases." "They symbolise the plight of all those Estonlans who fled abroad when the Red Army marched Into their country In 1 944." "They're part of an art collection assembled by Jaan Manltskl who, as a babe In arms, was caught up In It all." "Just from this coastline here many small fishing boats left over the Finnish Gulf to Finland or the Baltics to Sweden!" "And most people could only bring with them a suitcase!" "And many times when the small boats were crowded then they even had to leave them on the shore here!" "So this is some kind of reminder of what has happened on these shores!" "Havlng made his money as business manger of the pop group ABBA," "Manltskl came back home and offered his expertise to Estonla's new free-market economy." "Now all his energies are going Into this arts centre." "Hls paintings, by Estonlan artists, are a bit of everything, the good, the bad and the ugly." "As my mother would say, "I don't think I could live with that!"" "I would neither put it in my living room!" " No, exactly!" "Perhaps in the bathroom!" " 0kay!" "Jaan shows me his latest acquisition, and very topical It Is." "This is the painter Juri Arrak's view of the organised by individuals demolishing of the monster!" "PALIN:" "The monster being!" "?" "MANITSKl:" "This is the Soviet system!" "We started up in a very, very difficult situation!" "PALIN:" "Yeah!" "MANITSKl:" "The Estonian economy and the whole society was so integrated in the Soviet system!" "For example, to illustrate it, a big shoemaking factory in Tallinn produced left foot shoes, number 44!" "The right foot shoes were made in Irkutsk, maybe, or Murmansk or somewhere else!" "Back In Talllnn, the Incoming ferries are full as yet more people discover the unhurried appeal of the old town." "(BELL CLANGING)" "Across the Gothlc rooftops rises the new Estonla, a mini Manhattan, with a state-of-the-art electronic economy." "But In Old Town Square" "I discover there are limits to the Estonlan dream." "Buslnessman Peter Knoll tells me that for the Russlans who stayed on here the government has devised an exquisite torture." "Russians are obliged to learn Estonian, aren't they?" "That's correct!" "In order to become an Estonian citizen you must pass a test in Estonian, which comprises about 3,000 characters!" "That's why we have still," "I think it's around 1 0,000 or just slightly below, of residents in Estonia without nationality!" "So they're not citizens of Estonia but they are not Russians any more because they have given up their Russian citizenship!" "PALIN:" "So what rights do they have?" "They have the right to live here!" "They are mainly elderly people which are not learning the language any more but the family are taking care of them!" "However, this has been already discussed by the European Union as well, because you cannot have it that somebody is a resident in your country who has been living all his life and cannot have citizenship!" "So it's an issue actually on the European Union agenda!" "In Sovlet times, the Baltlc States were seen as something of a bracing seaside sanatorlum." "I've been recommended a clinic outside Talllnn where all sorts of traditional treatments await the tired traveller." "The lady I've come to see Is one of those Russlans who stayed on." "Her name Is Ljudmllla Agajeva and she's an hlrudotheraplst." " Next?" " Ah, hello!" " Hello!" "How are you?" " Hello!" "Very bad!" "0h, I'll help you!" " Let's go with me!" " I'm very bad because I've come here!" "What do you want me to take off?" "Shirt?" " Everything?" " Small striptease!" " Small striptease?" " Yes!" "(LAUGHING) 0kay!" "Right!" "There we go!" " It's here!" " 0h, I can go behind the screens!" "There we go!" "Small, not very good striptease!" "Is that okay?" "Enough?" "Is that okay?" "Enough?" "AGAJEVA:" "Very nice!" "Very nice!" " Please!" " 0kay!" "0n back or front?" " No!" " Back, okay!" "See, I've never done this before!" "This is the first time!" " Uh-huh!" "Comfort?" " So I don't know what happens!" " Do you have comfort?" " Yes, I am very comfortable!" " Yes, yes!" " My heart's beating rather fast!" "Isn't it?" " Quickly, quickly!" " Very fast, yes, I'm nervous, you see!" "I've never had small creatures!" "(AGAJEVA SPEAKING IN F0REIGN LANGUAGE)" "PALIN:" "Hmm?" " You can see!" " Yeah!" "0h, right!" "0h, yes, that doesn't make me feel any better!" " Better, very better!" " But they work?" "They do work to make me feel stronger?" "Yes, translator!" "'Cause I've been doing so much travelling!" "Just!" "0h, is that on my body now?" "So it is!" "Well, I experienced a slight sting, nothing more than having an injection!" " So it's sucking out bad blood or!" " Yes, yes!" " Bad blood!" " It's stuck to you now, isn't it?" " PALIN: 0oh, ow, ooh!" " 0h, oh!" "0ne's enough!" "Definitely like a little electric charge!" "These special leeches?" "AGAJEVA:" "Yes, yes!" "Special!" "PALIN:" "Leeches that you get from!" "It's not so bad, it's just!" "When you start thinking about what is going on," " Little black things with their!" " 0ops!" "!" "Heads into your body!" "It's like a series of quite sharp electric shocks!" "0h, it's quite, um!" "It's quite a!" "sort of strong stinging sensation!" "Put it this way, I won't be doing it again for a bit!" "Ah, I feel better!" "How much!" "How much blood do they take?" "0ne glass vodka!" " 0ne glass of vodka!" " Yes!" "PALIN:" "Yes, please!" " Two hundred!" " I like it straight up with a twist!" "!" "Maybe three hundred millilitres!" "Are you enjoying it?" "0h, look, they're getting quite engorged!" " Is that growing?" "Full of blood?" " I stimulation!" " You're stimulating the leech!" " Yes!" "0h, gosh!" "That's something I thought I'd never see in my life!" "Someone stimulating a leech!" "There's a first time for everything!" " Do they have teeth like!" " Yes, teeth!" " I understand!" " I understand, how!" " Three hundred teeths!" " Three hundred?" " Yes!" " Each of these little fellows?" "Yes, and three jaws!" " Three!" " Jaws!" " Jaws?" "0h, jaws!" "Three jaws!" " Yes!" "Three, four, five!" "That gives them some power!" "Three jaws, I mean, that's great!" "You can have breakfast, lunch and dinner at the same time!" "(LAUGHING)" " After they finish!" " Yes!" " !" "Take the blood, then what?" " Yes!" "What happens then?" "Do you kill them?" "I kill they!" "I kill!" " Yes, why?" " Because!" "I've become very fond of them!" " They're my friends!" " Yes, please!" " Yes!" " Well, I don't want you to kill them!" "Can they go somewhere to!" "Somewhere where they can retire?" "Sit quietly in an armchair!" " It's surprise for you, please!" " !" "Read Leech Weekly..." " Yes, yes!" " You're a hard woman!" "When they are hungry, you, but" " They're going to!" " 0kay!" "They're still sucking away at those, aren't they?" "Can you imagine that, halfway through a nice little steak and whomp, someone comes and pulls your chair away!" " Don't want!" " 0kay!" "Is that blood in them?" " Yes!" " 0h, can I just touch them?" " Very nice blood!" " There you are!" "Thank you very much!" "Thank you, Frank!" "Thank you, Arthur!" "They're hermaphrodites!" "Thank you, Frank and Diana!" "Thank you, Arthur and Elizabeth!" "You've done a good job, really!" " There they go!" " Yes!" "They know alcoholics!" "(PALIN GR0ANING) 0h, now that hurts!" "I don't want to watch them go to their deaths!" "AGAJEVA:" "Vodka, very strong vodka!" "PALIN:" "That's what it is?" "You're right!" "Can I have some of that vodka?" "Do you want vodka now?" "Yeah, lovely!" "But they've had the vodka!" "I have vodka!" "(GR0ANING)" "(AGAJEVA LAUGHING)" "Now that's something!" "That is something else!" "Four breasts!" "You want to see?" "Your friends!" "You're going to kill them?" "I don't want to watch that!" "Ahhh!" "AGAJEVA:" "All finished!" "PALIN:" "Thank you!" "Thank you!" "(AGAJEVA LAUGHING)" " Do they die like that?" " Yes!" "No long, drawn-out suffering?" "AGAJEVA:" "I was Mafioso!" " You were?" " Mafioso!" "You're a caring person but when the moment comes you can turn into a killer!" "Natasha!" "0h!" "Thank you!" "Thls Is Ape, my Idea of the perfect border post." " First time out here?" " First time, yes!" "No queues, no metal detectors, Just a man In a hut." "Thank you!" "Thank you very much!" "Pauslng only to correct my pronunciation to Ar-pay, not Ape, my courteous guard shows me Into Latvla." "Half as big again as Estonla," "Its population Is little more than two million." "Is this why their trains are so short?" "Somethlng's missing." "Thls Is supposed to be the 7.:50." "Maybe It's a national holiday." "Maybe they've heard about the leeches." "Eventually, an engine arrives and we become, officially, the 7.:50 from Aluksne to Gulbene." "(CHATTERING)" "Our progress through this sylvan countryside seems unreal, almost dreamlike." "Whlch seems entirely suitable for this Is Mldsummer's Eve, and a big night for Latvlans, as people up and down the country gather for the pagan festival of Janl." "(PE0PLE SINGING)" "The Latvlans converted to Chrlstlanlty much later than most of Europe." "So resolutely pagan were the local tribes that In 1 1 98 the Pope launched a crusade against them." "Here In the heart of the countryside, the pre-Chrlstlan traditions of Janl are being painstakingly revived." "The women wear garlands, which must contain at least 2 7 different flowers." "New arrivals at the celebration are ritually Insulted, and then expected to reply." "(SINGING)" "Once you've shown you can hold your own, you're allowed to hug the host." "(ALL LAUGHING)" "Janl Is a celebration of birth, growth and fecundity." "And they do It In style." "The Latvians have preserved 1,200 melodies for this one night, to sing on this one night!" "(W0MAN SPEAKING IN L0CAL LANGUAGE)" "And 28,000 texts, you know, little song lyrics!" "PALIN:" "Are these written down or just handed down?" " Yeah, written down!" "Book!" " They're written down!" "There's a book!" "(SPEAKING IN L0CAL LANGUAGE)" "Yeah, at the moment the sad thing is that people just get drunk on Jani and they think that tradition is not necessary and they don't know what to do on Jani, so that's what they do!" "In the evening we say goodbye to the sun and in the morning we welcome the sun again!" "And you can't sleep tonight!" " I don't think we're going to!" " No!" "Are you staying here?" "Dancers circle the oak tree, symbol of strength and virility." "Slngle women are entreated to find partners." "(CHATTERING)" "The food consists of cheese and bread, a little severe, but bread and cheese were all that was left to eat before the new harvest." "Mlnd you, there's plenty of home brew to wash It down." "(W0MAN CHATTERING)" "I hear my name called out and fear the worst." "(ALL SINGING)" "PALIN:" "Thank you!" " What were they saying?" " They were saying to you" " That you are now Mikhels, not Michael!" " Mikhels?" "Mikhels, which is a Latvian version, and the oak is always the symbol of strength and virility and on Midsummer night, in the circle, it's concentrated on your head!" "So you are crowned with strength, virility and they're singing and wishing that you will see everything well, you will hear everything well, and you will film everything well!" "(LAUGHING)" " Yes!" " And the filming part is part of the ancient tradition!" "Do I have to wear this throughout the rest of the filming?" "0f course!" " And the rest of the night!" " The rest of the night!" "The rest of the night!" "(SINGING)" "Belleve me, It's not easy to dance with half a Natlonal Park on your head." "The setting of the Mldsummer night's sun" "Is the most important moment of the evening." "Just before 1 1.:00, we process up the nearest hill to watch and to celebrate." "Thls Is developing Into quite a test of stamina." "And I've lost my Natlonal Park." "As darkness falls, last year's Janl wreath Is ceremonlally burnt." "(ALL SINGING)" "And a symbolic new fire Is lit." "(CHEERING)" "A blazing wheel of hopes and fears and thanks bowls down the hill." "And we all cheer." "(PE0PLE CHEERING)" "(CLAPPING)" "Rlga, the Latvlan capital, rich In buildings from Stallnlst grandeur to medieval Gothic, has recently acquired a reputation as a safe place for summit meetings." "To find out more about Rlga's status as a world host," "I'm on my way to meet one of the Baltlc's top chefs, Martln Rltlns." "A Latvlan, who learnt his trade In Canada and Corby, Northants, he now cooks for the world's most powerful." "This is a starter that we did for George Bush when he was here!" " Right, okay!" " And it!" "Crayfish!" " Crayfish is very, very traditional!" " Did he ask for this?" "No, he didn't, he didn't, but we talked!" " We talked to his!" " Yeah, okay!" " To his!" " 0h, look!" "I mustn't get too fond of it!" "That's my problem!" " You can take this home with you!" " 0h, thank you!" "(CHUCKLES)" "PALIN:" "So, a Baltic crayfish, is this?" "RITINS:" "It's a Baltic crayfish!" "It's a freshwater!" "It's a team work!" "And Bush has a team, so do we here!" "So it's, um!" "The sauce!" "It's onion!" "Sauce American!" "But with Latvian produce!" "Carrots, onions, tomatoes, garlic and cognac!" "PALIN:" "Cognac?" "RITINS:" "Cognac!" "Now, I want to see how can you!" "PALIN: 0h, right!" "RITINS:" "Up!" "Up!" "Up!" "Up!" "Up!" "Up!" "Up!" "Higher!" "Higher!" "When George came he only had an hour and a half!" "(RITINS LAUGHING)" "Now can I?" "I'll show you, I'll show you the trick!" "Like in tennis, you don't shake the pan, you shake the wrist!" "0h, right!" "It's so heavy, though!" "0ops!" "(RITINS LAUGHING)" "It's so incredibly heavy!" "RITINS:" "Now, how do you think!" "Wow, that is heavy!" "Respect to you guys who do that!" "How do you think Fanny Cradock did this?" " Yeah, I don't!" " She did it!" "I think she must have had a few pints beforehand!" " And a bit of colour!" " 0r something stronger!" "When you have someone like the President of the United States or whatever, well, not or whatever, when you have your friend George, President of the United States, and Laura to cook for, is it a big palava?" "Have you got security people coming around" " Keeping an eye on you?" " It's very, very much so!" "Like we do other state dinners, but never anything has been like this, and we had three days with their security people, their chefs!" " Three days for one meal?" " Three days!" "For one meal!" "Yes!" "I was with their chefs for three days!" "We discussed the menu!" "We went through it in very much detail and I had to show them where everything came from!" "Did they give you any juicy details about his!" " Absolutely, no, no, no!" " !" "Personal habits?" ""Don't give him apricot jam, 'cause his leg starts to wobble!"" "(PE0PLE CHATTERING)" " Now here we'll try again!" "The tennis!" " 0h, God!" "RITINS:" "No, it's in the wrist!" " It's not!" "It's not Shake 'N Bake!" " It's so heavy!" "No, no, no, but in my case it is!" "That's it!" "Let me see your wrists!" "Look at that!" "Look at that!" "Now that is a wrist!" "That's mobile and flexible!" " And that's pathetic!" " That's the tennis, that's the tennis!" "I'll work on it, I'll work on it!" " The whole lot?" " Not the whole lot, as you!" " We nearly had a Molotov cocktail!" " Yes, we nearly did, actually!" "You were telling me, actually, in the kitchen that the process is he vets!" "His chefs are with you for three days!" "For three days, we cook for 22!" "And I couldn't say, "This!" I usually say, "The nicest one," ""that's for our President," or "That's for that Prime Minister!"" "But we weren't allowed this time!" "I had to keep my mouth shut!" "Which is difficult for me!" "And they said, "That's the one!" Even if it was the most horrible one!" "Because this is!" "We're under stress, pressure, very quick, a la minute." "It was all cooked at the last minute!" "It wasn't pre-cooked!" "And that was the one that he had!" "Now another one I had to taste and another one, one of his security people tasted!" " Really?" " Yes!" "So it was very exciting!" "I mean!" "Your life was on the line!" "It was like a movie!" "It was like a movie!" " And that's the way they do it!" " That's it!" "Yeah!" "On Latvla's Baltlc coast stands an abandoned cluster of concrete housing blocks, the remains of a once-substantlal Sovlet presence." "(RES0NATING B00M)" "Once they spoke of pride, achievement and a better future." "Now they're turning to dust." "And this Is the reason why they were here." "Thls was one of the Sovlet Union's most important ears on the outside world." "PALIN: 0h, so here we are!" "In the belly of the beast!" "It was so important that when the Cold War ended, the people who built It tried to destroy lt." "But they reckoned without world opinion." "In the old control room, Yurls Zhagars, a Latvlan astronomer, explains how they saved the Ventsplls radio telescope" "In the nick of time." "And it was like in a fairy tale!" "Let's say some 1 5 minutes before execution or little bit more, the order of destroying was changed for some kind of electrical demolition, but not touching the important parts of the instruments!" "And it was because the world's radio astronomical society was making some protestations, as well as Russian Academy of Science!" "That to destroy the best radio telescope in Northern Europe only on political reasons, it's some kind of vandalism!" "Instead they sent In a wrecking team to make It lmposslble to use." "This is!" "This is one of the examples of electric sabotage because all these connections has been dismounted and disconnected!" "And no any paper, no any diagram how to connect them!" "PALIN: 0h, really!" "So it was some kind of scientific puzzle for our engineers!" "And some challenge to really put into!" "And this is not the only box!" "We have at least four such boxes, eight panels, but how to connect it was a hard job!" "And this demolition work, it was performed during one week!" "We have worked four years to put them back!" "PALIN:" "How does this compare in, sort of, size and scale to other radio telescopes?" "From the point of the scale it's not the biggest one!" "Europe has three to five of the bigger radio telescopes of the scale of 70 metres!" "As in Jodrell Bank, in Robledo in Spain, and in Effelsberg in Germany!" "But the value of the telescope is not only the size, the value is also the accuracy of the surface!" "And accuracy of the surface is very high for this telescope!" "It's really the best radio telescope of the Northern Europe!" "Let's come!" "PALIN: 0kay!" "Like a submarine or whatever!" " Yes, yes!" " A submarine in the sky!" "And now the next level!" "And here is our submarine!" " Like a submarine!" " It looks like a submarine!" "And it's tilting when we are working!" "This whole chamber tilts, does it?" "Yes, and you can walk on the left wall as well!" "So it is!" "How far does it tilt?" "How many degrees?" "About 1 00!" " Really?" " So more than 90 degrees!" "It must be a rather weird sensation!" " ZHAGARS:" "Be careful!" " You could have got a lift!" "It's tall!" " Wow!" "Fantastic!" " Let me help you!" "PALIN:" "Here we are!" "Pointing at the heavens!" "ZHAGARS:" "We are on this!" "0n top!" "PALIN:" "I really feel!" "Well done to you and your team!" "You have saved this thing, you know!" "Yes, we have saved it!" "But we have saved it for!" "There's not so many beautiful radio telescopes in the world!" "And this is one of the, really, of the top instruments!" "So, it's to be used for extragalactic radio astronomy!" "It's the best application we can offer!" "And it's a wonderful suntrap!" "(B0TH LAUGHING)" "ZHAGARS:" "Yes, as well!" "As well as for!" "Yes, you could have two lounges round here, you could make all the money you need!" "I know, but this surface is the most valuable part of the telescope!" "Its accuracy is better than one millimetre!" "Savlng the telescope was a rare victory for common sense." "Across the border Is the largest of the Baltlc republics, Llthuanla." "Influenced more by Poland than Sweden, It's staunchly Catholic." "And In the middle of its green and pleasant countryside" "Is a remarkable religious site." "Thls Is the Hlll of Crosses, a symbol of Llthuanlan defiance for over 1 50 years." "The Communlsts bulldozed It three times and once even flooded the area with sewage before a Papal visit." "Whlch only served to make It even more popular." "(CR0SSES TINKLING)" "The skyline of the capital Vllnlus shows Llthuanla's mixed fortunes." "One of the most enlightened empires of medieval Europe," "It's since fallen under the sway of Poland," "Sweden, Germany and tsarist Russia." "In the Second World War alone It was occupied three times by the Sovlet Union, then by the Germans, then again by Sovlet troops." "These are the names of Llthuanlans who tried to resist." "In thls building, In the heart of Vllnlus, once a courthouse, once even a boys' school, the occupiers dealt, brutally, with that resistance." "The basement where prisoners were kept and often tortured" "Is now open to the public." "I put on a headset to let me know what I'm about to see." "MAN 0N TAPE:" "Welcome to the Genoclde Vlctlms Museum." "Housed In the former KGB headquarters, the museum Is the only one of its kind In the Baltlc States." "Object number one." "The padded cell." "Thls Is one of the grimmest places In the prison." "The walls are padded and soundproofed, with a straitjacket on the wall used for those who resisted or were deranged with torture." "The walls absorbed their cries and shouts for help." "Thls cell was fitted out In 1 9 73, though there were similar cells before that." "Object number two." "Thls Is a guard post." "From the far end of this room the guards watched the outside windows of the cells round the clock." "In 1 964, when the prison premises were reduced, four guard booths remained, three Inside and one In the courtyard." "There were telephones and alarm systems In the booths for armed guards." "It was a hlgh-securlty prison." "Only one escape Is known." "Object number three." "The next room contains two cells with concrete pools In the floors, fitted out In about 1 945." "Wltnesses say that they had to either stand In Ice-cold water, on Ice In winter, or on a small stand." "When they dozed off they fell Into the water." "A political prisoner recalled," ""I did everything not to freeze to death." ""Though I was weak with Illness," ""I would walk, run or try to stand," ""but I kept slipping off onto the Ice." ""Eventually, I curled up, exhausted," ""on the bloodstained Ice floor." ""Some prisoners were kept there for five days and nights. "" "PALIN:" "The television tower above Vllnlus has become a shrine to Baltlc liberation." "In 1 99 1, 1 3 unarmed Llthuanlans were killed by the Red Army as they tried to protect the freedom to broadcast" "Llthuanla's Independence vote." "It was the climax of three years of protest." "Two years earlier, an estimated two million men, women and children from all the Baltlc republics" "Jolned hands In a human chain which stretched over 300 miles from Talllnn to Vllnlus." "The chain marked 50 years of smouldering resentment." "(SINGING 0N PA)" "(ALL SINGING)" "Song Festlvals, which were permitted, provided an outlet for antl-Russlan feeling." "The protest, which became known as the Slnglng Revolutlon, was something quite unique In politics, and It led to the freedom of the Baltlc States." "We are a singing nation!" "Well, I've heard a lot about this, that you are!" "Algls Greltal Is a Llthuanlan TVstar." "I want to see just how it works!" "I mean, can you just get people to sing?" "Ah, it's very easy!" "(ALL SINGING)" "Convincing?" "PALIN:" "Very good, yeah!" "Very good!" "PALIN:" "Beautiful!" "Now I'm convinced, yes!" "Maybe they could stay and get some other people and we'll all sing together!" "PALIN:" "Have a sit down and we'll find!" "That's very good!" "You get a little choir to do that then I would be impressed!" "I'd be very impressed!" " 0h, not that one!" " No?" "PALIN:" "Do you know this man?" "Do you know him?" " Yes!" " Yes!" "0h! "Yes!" Wasn't very! "Yes!"" "PALIN:" "Now we're all going to sing together the same song!" "(ALL SINGING)" "Is that enough?" "Maybe another song!" "No, we don't know the words!" "But very good!" "No, that's very good!" " Was it?" " You've made the point!" " I think that's excellent!" " So it's $50, then!" "Very good!" "Eurovision Song Contest next year!" "0kay!" "Thls Is Nlda In southern Llthuanla." "And the chunky boat taking me out of the harbour" "Is an old Baltlc fishing barque." "We're heading towards one of Europe's most Intrlgulng landscapes, a 60-mlle long, two-mlle wide sandbank they call the Curonlan Splt." "Thls formidable wall of sand Is one of the most extraordinary and fragile environments on the continent." "Now protected as a Natlonal Park, these stlll-shlftlng sands curve away to the south and west with the Baltlc waves on one side and lazy lagoons on the other." "Forests have been planted to help hold this young and delicate strip of land together." "As I follow the paths and roads that lead through them" "I find that the curiosities of nature are matched by a few political surprises." "In one of the odder twists of post-war politics, this part of East Prussla was ceded to the victorious Russlans." "They kicked out the Germans and re-named the ancient city of Konlgsberg" "Kallnlngrad." "But now their neighbours have won Independence," "Kallnlngrad Is marooned." "A Russlan Island In a European sea." "But today the mood In Kallnlngrad Is resolutely optimistic." "It's exactly 60 years ago today that the old Prusslan city of Konlgsberg was consigned to history." "And Kallnlngrad, named after a Stallnlst president of the USSR, took its place." "Today It's the red, white and blues of the Russlan Federatlon that are the colours of celebration." "As a result of the ethnic cleansing of the Germans, everyone gathered here can trace themselves back to Mother Russia." "(MAN SINGING IN RUSSIAN)" "The opening ceremony In front of the new Vlctory monument owes more to Eurovlslon than any memories of Red Square." "Note the brand-new Orthodox cathedral In the background, of which the old Communlst regime would certainly not have approved." "Now It's the turn of the suits, followed by a press circus hanging on every word." "(MAN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN 0N PA)" "The Mayor of Kallnlngrad welcomes, amongst others," "Presldent Putln's man from Moscow." "Putln's wife, by the way, Is a Kallnlngrad girl." "Also on parade Is a Russlan Orthodox priest, and a much be-medalled veteran of the Great Patriotic War." "Representlng Russlan power today Is the Admlral of the Baltlc Fleet, whose nuclear submarines lle just up the coast." "(CLAPPING)" "Then It's time for the Russlan national anthem." "Old tune, new words." "(NATl0NAL ANTHEM PLAYING)" "(CLAPPING)" "The rest of the celebrations are delightfully un-solemn." "(CHEERING)" "A Brldes' Bus cruises the streets dlsgorglng a dozen young girls all with one cry, "Spraznlkoml" "Happy Holiday. "" "What Is there not to like about Kallnlngrad?" "I ask my guide, Olga Danilova, whether Kallnlngraders feel Russlan or European." "We feel Russian!" "This goes without saying!" "But maybe special Russian, different from Russians living in the mainland Russia due to this geographical location we found ourselves in!" "In what way would you say you feel different from the others in what you call mainland Russia?" "Because we are so close to Europe, we are part, we are a geographical part of Europe!" "And we travel more to Poland and to Lithuania, further to Europe, than we travel to Russia!" "And some of the children living here, they have never been to Russia!" "But to go to Poland or to Lithuania is quite a common thing!" "Is there any appetite here for independence from Russia?" "0h, no!" "No way!" "We don't even have this idea in our minds 'cause it is not possible!" "We are Russians!" "Though we travel to Russia not very often, most of us, but we are Russians!" "(PLAYING WALTZ MUSIC)" "PALIN:" "So, this open-air singing, dancing a big thing?" "DANIL0VA:" "Yes, yes, yes, it is!" "It is very popular!" "Especially among older generation!" " PALIN:" "Yeah!" " Who are just enjoying themselves!" "PALIN:" "And women, a lot!" "Single women!" "0h, thank you!" " Is that because of the lack of men?" " DANIL0VA:" "There are not enough men!" "Correct, correct!" "PALIN:" "It's the war, legacy of the war, is it?" "Yeah, yeah!" "Well spotted!" "I shall be leaving from this dockslde early next morning, and very hospitably, the captain of this venerable old banana boat Vityaz has agreed to let me use his cabin as a temporary base." "PALIN:" "Famous ship!" "W0MAN:" "Hello!" "PALIN:" "Captain!" "Hello, Captain!" "How are you?" "Thank you very much indeed for letting us come here!" "Very, very kind of you!" "After its banana boat days, the Vityaz evacuated 20,000 Germans from here In 1 945." "It was given to the Brltlsh who In turn gave her to the Russlans, for whom she ended up mapping the world's deepest sea-bed, the Marlana Trench In the Pacific." "This is quite a tour, isn't it, to get to the Captain's cabin?" "Ah, a little bridge!" "It's now the centrepiece of Kallnlngrad's Museum of the World Ocean." " Welcome, it's your room!" " 0h, thank you!" "Here you will be sleeping!" "It's your bed!" "Fantastic, that's lovely!" " 0kay, goodbye!" " Captain's cabin!" "Thank you very much!" "(B0TH SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN)" "That's very nice!" "Not wanting my last night to be an antl-cllmax," "Olga's laid on a cultural visit." "(CR0WD CLAPPING)" "Part historical re-enactment, part general punch-up, this homage to the Teutonlc Knlghts ends In group hugs and a huge bonfire." "(CR0WD CHEERING)" "It may be European rather than Russlan history they're celebrating, but tonight In Kallnlngrad nobody really cares." "It seems strange to be marking In such flamboyant style a city named after Mlkhall Kallnln, a Sovlet bureaucrat who no one remembers." "(H0RN S0UNDS)" "Hi!" "Hello there!" "Poland, I gather!" "Let me give you that!" "That's great!" "Thanks!" "Thank you!" "(THANKING IN RUSSIAN) 0kay!" "I'd hoped to sail down the Rlver Pregel and across the Bay of Gdansk to my next destination and 1 7th country, Poland." "But a sudden maritime tiff between the Russlans and the Poles has resulted In a resounding "Nyet" to my plan." "Whlle I thlnk of what else to do, I settle for a farewell cruise with Max and Sergel along the Kallnlngrad waterfront." "Past dlsused wharves and Idle cranes." "Past my old friend the Vityaz!" "Remnants of the Baltlc Fleet are In for re-flts but on the whole this Is a ghost port." "Kallnlngrad, more than anywhere else I've seen," "Is a victim of its history." "Physlcally European, but emotionally, spiritually and politically clinging to the Kremlln."