"WhenI wasseven, I met my best friends." "They were idiots, and I loved them for it." "We did everything together." "No matter what, we had each other's backs." "Nothing could change that, even when this jackass got cancer." "It wasn't supposed to be a big deal." "We thought it would go away, but it didn't." "It got worse." "Somewhere along the way I realized that the guy that kept us all together wasn't gonna be around forever." "We gonna make it?" "Get your bike." "Better to go out with a bang than a whimper." "It was a dump anyway." "They already poured the concrete for the new school." "You never answered my text." "Figured I'd see you at the party." "Better late than never." "This room's full of posers." "They're not all bad." "Eh, you're one of them." "Popping the lid." "Fuck are you doing?" "When's the last time you saw Sammy?" "It's probably empty." "They're cremating him tomorrow." "What's "cremating?"" "It's where they burn the body and put the ashes in a can." "You're gonna scare him." "I'm not scared." "Yeah." "Then they dump the ashes, and Sammy's gone forever." "It's not like that, okay?" "Then what's it like?" "Fuck cancer, man." "Fuck cancer." "Sure you don't want to say "bye" face to face?" "If I had known, I would..." "ooh, a titty alert." "I'd like to cheer her up and down for that matter." "Know what I mean?" "No." "I do." "Don't worry, lump." "I heard from a very reliable source that your brother knows a little bit more than he lets on." "Motherfucker." "Sister-fucker." "Fuck." "Smooth." "I didn't mean to." "No big deal." "How you doing, baby?" "Choke on a cock." "I like your dress." "Couldn't find something that said, "sad, not broken."" "You okay?" "Half the school texted me, Jimmy." "I wasn't sure what to say." "Fuck you." "It's nice of you to finally show." "By the time I got here, your dad said it was too late." "Where are your parents?" "Vacation." "I'm watching lump here for a few days." "Kate... anyway, the old man needs me." "Talk to you later." "So desperate." "So desperate." "Did you get a shovel list from Sammy?" "Mm, he covered his ass when you decided to spend his last days putting it in his sister." "This pasta sucks." "Don't you think we ought to take care of it?" "What's a "shovel list?"" "Think about all the shit you have in your bedroom that you wouldn't want your parents to find if you died." "Like dirty dishes?" "No, lump, like two girls and one cup." "I don't know what that is." "It's two girls shitting in a cup, and they eat it." "It's surprisingly arousing." "I'm going." "Mm." "Don't you ever talk to your brother?" "Go on the count of three." "They're mourning a dead kid." "All right, no one's gonna miss us." "Remember what i told you, lump." "Open it, pussy." "Look under the mattress and sock drawer." "I'll take the closet." "I know what I'm fucking doing." "Did you give him this?" "Yeah." "He was dying anyway." "Dude, his dad's a cop." "Dude, he has weed in his closet, and his dad couldn't find it?" "Shitty cop." "Only what's on the list." "Sammy's not gonna miss this shit." "Jimmy." "That's the last of it." "Here?" "Yeah." "I figured we'd take the edge off." "Look at this." "Is that Mary Keller?" "Holy shit." "She's in college." "Sammy said he didn't want to die without seeing her naked." "Let me see." "You know, is it weird that I kind of want cancer now?" "Is it bad that I kind of hope you get it?" "Ugh!" "Oh, my god." "It reeks in here." "We just wanted to come in before your parents found anything incriminating." "Mm, getting all your shit together, huh?" "Yep." "Somebody has to." "Did you guys find two girls one cup?" "It's gonna be okay." "How do you know?" "People keep saying it." "Uh-uh, that one's already spoken for, champ." "You know, I thought there'd be a lot more drugs in here." "More what?" "Let's have it." "Come on." "It's mine." "Kate..." "Your mom needs you downstairs." "Yeah, of course." "Did you get everything?" "Hmm." "Mr. hanes..." "Jimmy..." "I'm needed downstairs." "We got it all, Sammy." "Fucking lump." "You told me to take her to you." "Want to hit the hole later?" "Like old times?" "I got a ton of shit from the drawer before Ted came in." "Figured you'd want some." "Thanks." "I can't believe it's over." "Welcome to the rest of your life." "Slow down." "Keep up." "Now that Sammy's dead, is Dan your new best friend?" "No." "You brought the lump?" "I'm not supposed to leave him alone." "He's hitting the big leagues early." "Danny, stop." "Don't tell mom." "You can have his porn mags." "It's like masturbating in the stone age." "This other shit we're gonna have to split." "The pages are stuck together." "Shit." "There's a snapchat addressed to me." "Shit's from beyond the grave." "All right, I sent it to you." "We were deleting." "I decided against it." "Hey,dickhole." "I'mnotsureIcan trustyouwiththis sinceI couldn't withmysister, butI wantto be buried..." "InmyeaglesJersey." "Don'tmessit up ..." "Again." "Bye." "Fuck." "It's gone." "That was depressing." "His Jersey was on the wall." "What are you gonna do about it?" "I need to talk to your parents." "Can this wait?" "No." "What's this all about?" "I... well, we wanted to... we found a will." "He left you a note?" "It was a text." "It was a snapchat to be exact." "Don't worry." "He wasn't naked." "We knew you were cremating him, but we just wanted to make sure that Sammy would... we didn't get a note." "He wanted to be buried in his Jersey." "Can I see it?" "The texts disappear after you send them, and it's what he said." "Look, mcginnis already has him at the funeral home." "What about the Jersey?" "Guys, he didn't send the message." "Then can you cremate him wearing it?" "All right." "Give me a minute." "Jimmy, I know you didn't get to be here..." "And I don't know what happened between you boys." "No answer." "Let's get the car." "Open your ears, son." "He's gone." "We appreciate everything you did." "We really do." "We appreciate it, but we didn't get a note, and I was there." "I was there at the end, and he was happy." "Look, if you guys are gonna toast him, at least do it the way he wanted." "Excuse me?" "What did you say?" "Let me handle this." "Sorry." "We can get the Jersey." "I'll get someone to drive us over if you're not up to do it, okay?" "Jimmy, we're tired." "Right, but..." "Jimmy, just go." "I just think that if... don't you think if he wanted it he would've told us?" "So that's it?" "I'm not giving up." "I'm waiting till dark." "Why are we here?" "The funeral home is 30 miles away from here." "We can't bike it." "So we're... my old man keeps his car keys in his nightstand." "Shit." "Your parents lock their own bedroom?" "They like privacy." "So trusting." "Are you helping or what?" "Mom and dad are gonna kill us." "It's fine." "We'll get a new one at home depot." "They'll never know." "Gonna have to do this together." "Don't get all metaphorical." "Can't we just get a different Jersey from one of the other players on the team?" "Sammy wanted his Jersey." "If he wanted to be in someone else's shit, he would've sent the will to them." "Yeah, well, fuck Sammy." "We're already going out of our way..." "Do it, pussy." "Hey." "Are we gonna do this or what?" "You're staying." "I want to go." "It's too dangerous." "If you leave him here, he's gonna blow our cover again." "You're gonna get in our way." "I promise I won't." "You're not coming." "Just let him come." "Just get in the back." "Go." "Why do I have a feeling that this is gonna be fucking epic?" "You piece of shit!" "Sorry, man, I'm new at this." "We'll be out late." "Will your parents mind?" "I make my own rules, bitch." "I was gonna eat that." "It's time." "Wake the fucking neighborhood while you're at it." "So how do we do it?" "She threw me her sheets." "Are you fucking serious?" "It worked." "I bet you only got through missionary before you blew your load." "Shut up and give me boost." "Come on." "Pull yourself up." "Shit!" "Usually I like to be the one on top." "I have an idea." "It's fucking stuck." "You jammed it earlier." "Suck my dick." "Where are you going?" "Well, we'll fit now." "Motherfuck." "It has to be here." "Just be careful." "You broke the fucking window?" "No, it was like that when we found it." "Honestly, what do you have against texting me?" "I could've just opened the front door." "We're just looking for the Jersey." "Someone else already has it." "Of course." "Do you know who?" "Get off!" "Touchy." "So what, you're just gonna put him in the Jersey?" "It'll be really quick." "We'll put it on him before anybody notices." "Come on, Jimmy." "This bitch doesn't have anything for us." "We need to bail." "Don't call her a bitch, asshole." "I told you we should've snagged someone else's Jersey." "What's the fucking point of that?" "Figured some asshole's gonna take it." "Guess I was right." "Give it." "Fuck off." "We need the Jersey." "You're... you're asking me to give up the last piece of my dead brother?" "I'm not asking you to give up anything." "Sammy is." "He didn't leave me anything else." "He left us a mission, what he wants us to do together." "That's why I'm here." "That's why Dan's here." "So let's go." "I..." "I don't know if I can..." "we got to have the Jersey." "Come on, take it off, baby." "Okay, turn around." "Okay." "You know, I was fine with you in your bra." "Shit." "Come on." "Come on." "We're doing the right thing." "Shit." "Quick in and out." "Yeah, my specialty." "The lights are on." "Somebody's inside." "Hey, relax, champ." "Give me a boost." "I don't see anyone." "All right, well, this is a waste of fucking time." "Jesus Christ." "Yeah, that hurt." "Okay, so what's the plan?" "We're gonna have to break a window." "Lump, what are you doing?" "Holy shit." "You're still a pussy to me." "Yeah, he's dead." "Not the rack I wanted to see tonight." "Jimmy." "Ready?" "Wait." "I came to slip a Jersey on my best friend, not to see his penis." "Grow up." "He's fucking naked." "He's fucking naked." "They're cremating our friend in the nude?" "That's harsh." "If you have such a problem with it, why don't you give him your pants?" "I'm six inches taller than Sammy, all right?" "He's gonna look like a fucking clown in heaven." "Give him lump's pants." "He looks dead-kid sized." "He'll wear mine." "We shouldn't have seen him like this." "No one should." "So much for everyone wanting to remember him alive." "You know, we should take a picture for his Facebook." "Fuck off." "It's a fucking idea, Kate." "Lump, give me the Jersey." "Here you go." "Try slipping it over his head." "It'd be easier with him standing." "This is too fucking weird." "Just help me out." "Lift him up." "Get his legs." "One, two, three." "Get him up." "Yeah." "Put his arms up." "All right, let's go." "We're fucking going." "Hide." "Come on." "Come on." "We got your message." "Still not talking to me?" "We have to get him out of here." "Give me a hand?" "Whoa." "What the fuck are you guys doing?" "Sammy didn't want to be cremated." "Are you serious?" "They just burned the coffin." "They think he's in there." "This is our chance." "No." "No, this isn't supposed to happen." "Sammy wasn't supposed to die, Kate." "The least we can do is give him one last wish, one last shot to give him what he wanted." "Sammy was my best friend." "Our best friend." "We can't let him down, okay?" "Especially after he found out you were fucking Jimmy." "What?" "Sammy knew?" "Yes, Kate." "Your bedroom was right next door." ""Oh, Jimmy." Subtle." "He never s-said anything." "No wonder he didn't write you into the will." "Never talk to her like that again." "Why the fuck are you mad at me?" "Maybe if you weren't too busy putting your dick in your dead best friend's sister, none of this would be happening." "Goddamn it!" "This is fucking crazy." "We can't do this." "We have to." "We screwed up." "We can fix it." "We can make this right, Kate." "We got to make this right." "He won't fit back there." "It's full of my dad's shit." "Fine." "Fuck it." "Put him in the backseat then." "No, no, no." "No." "What?" "No, guys, I sit back there." "And?" "Shut the fuck up, Kate." "Stop being such a pussy." "No." "Hey, guys, there's no way I'm sitting back here." "There is no fucking way I'm sitting back here." "Then we're leaving you." "Fuck." "Watch out." "Fuck you guys, all right?" "Fuck you guys so much." "I don't know who they are, but... well, I'd really appreciate it if you would look out for them." "No problem." "Yeah, we can do that." "Thank you." "Sure." "Officer Hughes." "So what do you got?" "What are we... your brother wanted to be buried, and we'll need shovels." "Is there a way in?" "We're on a roll with the windows." "Step aside." "Gonna need a bigger block." "Holy shit." "I feel like a fucking action movie star." "All units, we have reports of a 459 at parktown hardware." "Witnessessay kidsresponsible." "Two shovels, a pickax, it's hard to tell what else." "And you got no security camera?" "We can barely afford the alarm system." "Who saw the kids?" "She did." "Kind of looks like he's sleeping." "So peaceful." "Sucks we couldn't keep him around, you know, like, stuff him, trade him every weekend." "Should we say something?" "Sammy was alive." "Now Sammy is dead." "We took his body, and now we're gonna bury it on the side of a hill." "Thank you, captain obvious." "Um..." "How about, uh, "life's not fair?"" "Forget it." "Six feet down?" "Fuck." "We didn't think this through." "I said this was a bad idea." "You guys are fucking idiots." "We got him in the Jersey." "That was supposed to be the hard part." "We have to bury him." "Jimmy, the ground's fucked." "You couldn't just let him be?" "There you go, Sammy." "Pick a place." "Where do you want to be for the rest of your..." "Whatever?" "Why didn't he tell your parents what he wanted?" "Because Sammy knew you were the only one that would give him anything he wanted." "He wanted him to keep his hands off you, but that really didn't do much." "Shut the fuck up." "I've done a pretty good job of fucking up so far." "Wow." "The skyline's really beautiful at night." "It's a hell of a lot better without that shithole of a school." "All Sammy talked about was wanting to play there." "What about the new stadium, huh?" "There's plenty of loose dirt." "It won't be too hard to dig." "He'll have the best seats in the fucking house." "Seriously?" "Hell, yeah." "Let's do it." "Knock it off." "I'm trying to make his last hours fun, all right?" "This is it for Sammy." "I don't get why he can't just stick it out the window to pee." "Maybe he gets stage fright." "Get out and go." "Do you need someone to go with you?" "Uh-huh." "All right, come on." "I'll go with you." "We don't all need to go." "You're not gonna leave me out here with him." "Why not?" "He's your brother." "Not who I was talking about." "Come on." "Could we use your bathroom?" "It's over in the back." "Thanks." "Hey, you think Sammy wants a lottery ticket?" "Hello?" "Hello?" "You've been really nice up until the last 24 hours..." "Staying in Sammy's room, taking care of him, taking care of me." "I really didn't mind the change at all." "You told me to choke on a cock this morning, so... you were talking about my tits at my brother's funeral." "I would take that as a compliment." "Did you ever think that maybe if you were less of a dick 24-7 that you might have some other friends?" "I mean, Sammy's gone." "You obviously hate Jimmy and me, so..." "Who do you have left?" "Guess you're gonna have to go play with yourself then." "This never would've happened if she went for me." "But she likes Jimmy." "Jimmy likes her, so I guess that's that." "I miss you, man." "Hungry?" "I didn't eat at the funeral." "We got burgers earlier." "Couldn't have waited until after you broke into my house?" "Poor planning on my part." "Thanks for bringing me along." "I appreciate it." "I know I wasn't in the will, but..." "i meant what I said earlier." "You're supposed to be here." "'Cause of the Jersey?" "Because I want you here." "Whoa." "Wait, what?" "Are you trying to kiss me?" "I mean, it's cute, sort of." "Kind of a really fucked up time to try, but at least you're making the effort." "So what does lump like to eat?" "I don't know." "You don't know what your brother likes to eat?" "Lump, what's your favorite candy?" "Milky ways." "Milky ways." "It's milky ways." "It's so weird you guys don't know anything about each other." "You should just go bond or whatever." "I also like Reese's." "Shut up." "You're not gonna impress me by being mean to lump." "It's how we communicate." "Whoa, whoa, whoa." "Do I sense some tension over here or what?" "Dude, you should be at the car." "Sammy wanted a slushy." "Do you think he'll get a brain freeze?" "Hey, if you guys aren't gonna buy something, you need to leave." "Don't be a downer." "I'll be in the car keeping an eye on Sammy." "Hey, she's got to pay for those." "Relax." "I got it." "$2.99?" "Here." "I know they're your favorite." "Can't believe you left me here with these idiots." "How could you even be mad at him?" "How many of my friends did you try to hit on all the time?" "Remember in sixth grade when I had that big birthday sleepover, and you stole Allison polsol's panties?" "Ooh, the poor thing had to free-beaver it all weekend." "But I covered for you, and I didn't hold a grudge." "Oh, fuck." "Yeah, fuck you, pig!" "We are so dead." "You wanted to come." "Man the fuck up." "Hey, take it easy." "A little help here." "Turn right." "Turn right." "Turn left here." "Kill the fucking lights." "You really fucked us, Dan." "You fucked us by dragging Sammy out of his coffin." "Leave Sammy out of this." "Please stop saying his name." "Guys... you're just jealous 'cause he left us a mission and you a fucking key to something he didn't even want you to have." "Shut the fuck up." "Fuck you, Dan." "You're the one who brought us on this quest to put a Jersey on somebody you call your best friend." "But you didn't know his last wish, 'cuz you were too busy fucking his sister!" "I just want to do what Sammy wants." "Sammy wanted to be a-fucking-live." "Stop!" "Guys!" "What?" "Red light!" "Ugh." "Ugh." "Jimmy?" "Hey, you okay?" "Yeah." "My door is jammed." "Where's Sammy?" "Ohh." "Hey." "Hey, you okay?" "I think he broke his arm." "Dan?" "Please." "Please." "Please what?" "My arm is... just don't use it unless you have to." "Jimmy." "He's fine." "He wanted to come." "He wanted to join the big leagues." "Here he is." "Where the fuck is Sammy?" "Dan." "Dan." "I got him." "What does it look like I'm doing?" "I can carry him." "Fuck you!" "Jimmy, his arm, it's serious." "He's fine." "He's not fine." "Hey, stop." "Fucking stop!" "Goddamn it!" "That's it." "That's it." "I'm fucking done." "I'm out." "We're almost there." "It's, like, two miles away." "He needs to be seen by a doctor." "Lump, look at me." "You're fine, right?" "Fuck you." "What'd you say?" "Fuck you." "Fuck you." "You're not my brother." "He's your brother." "He needs me." "He's dead!" "You're never around." "You're always with him." "I hate Sammy." "He threw batteries at my head." "He stole money from my sock drawer for weed." "He spit on me." "And when you were with him, you did the same things." "My best friend's dead, lump." "Look, nobody cares how hard it is for you, okay?" "Do you think I liked having a bunch of assholes break in to my house?" "Do you think i liked being blackmailed into giving you my Jersey?" "Do you think I like spending the night with his body?" "Don't fucking touch me." "I'm just trying my best to do what he wanted." "News flash:" "Sammy's dead." "My brother is dead." "Your brother's alive, okay, so fuck you." "I went to him, and I told him that I liked you." "And he said "no."" "He said I wasn't allowed, and then his dumb ass died without ever talking to me again." "He would've come around." "But you didn't even wait." "The next thing I know, you're whoring it up in school." "I know I'm not one of the popular kids, but I hear things." "Oh, what did you hear, huh?" "That there was always gonna be some before you, that there was always gonna be some after you?" "You didn't even call." "You fucked me and left me." "Even when my brother died, you didn't even send me a text." "Goddamn it!" "You are such an asshole!" "Your brother made me this way." "Sammy always wanted everyone to know what he wasn't gonna get to do." "So he made everyone else feel bad for not having a disease." "It's why he left a fucking message even after your parents told him the way it had to go down." "If it's such a fucking burden, then why?" "Why do you do it?" "Because he left it to me." "Because he didn't trust me with his sister, but he did with this." "Well, you better hurry up then, 'cause he's slipping away." "Hey." "Dan?" "Dan?" "The school is the other way." "Fuck the school, Jimmy!" "We're almost there." "I'm taking him back to the funeral home." "We don't have time." "The sun's about to come up." "Come on." "Don't fucking touch him!" "Are we really gonna do this?" "Yes, Jimmy!" "You've been bossing me around for the last 12 hours!" "You can go, just leave Sammy." "I'm taking him back to where he fucking belongs." "He wanted to be buried, remember?" "Sammy's dead, motherfucker!" "What he wants doesn't matter anymore." "It doesn't fucking matter!" "Don't you get that?" "Where the fuck is Kate and lump?" "Where are they, Jimmy?" "They leave you too, huh?" "Well, fuck, man, you spend half the fucking time worrying about the alive motherfuckers instead of the dead ones, you'd probably have a lot more friends." "You'd probably get a lot more pussy too." "Remember when me, you, and Sammy were friends?" "Well, guess what." "I barely fucking can anymore." "So choke on that, dick." "You take care of the dead kid." "I'll go find the alive ones, all right?" "I'm gonna put my arm around your girl." "I'll take care of your fucking brother too, just like I took care of Sammy when he was alive!" "Fuck!" "I wanted to be there for you." "We've got to stay out of sight." "Hey, homey, you lost?" "No." "What's wrong with your friend over here?" "Don't fucking touch him!" "Hey, hey." "Hey, calm down." "Relax." "Just let me go." "You need some help, homey?" "Fuck off." "This kid's definitely lost." "What's a little white boy like you and his dah-dah-dahs doing downtown anyway, huh?" "None of your fucking business." "Ohh." "You gonna let this bitch talk to you like that?" "Who the fuck does he think he is?" "Dude, look at this crazy-ass white boy talking to his drunk-ass friend." "Don't fucking talk to him like that." "The fuck you gonna do?" "Ah!" "Five-o!" "Bounce!" "Get in the car." "I'm sorry." "Sorry?" "Do you have any idea how much trouble you're in, huh?" "What a fucking mess this is?" "How does something like this happen?" "I don't know." "You don't know." "Jesus Christ, Jimmy." "I have known you your entire life, and this is the dumbest, most dangerous thing you've ever done, so you cannot sit here and tell me that you do not know." "I should've been there at the end." "That's why he sent me the message." "I owed him." "Now that he's gone, there's... there's nothing I can do to make it up to him." "Jimmy, this message that you're killing yourselves over, maybe he didn't send it, because in the end, he knew that you didn't owe him anything." "What were you planning on doing with his body?" "We were gonna take him to the new stadium." "We thought that's where he'd want to be, in his Jersey," "finally in the game." "Oh." "That is so..." "Stupid." "We did so much crazy stuff when Sammy was alive." "I didn't think this was gonna be any different." "Yeah, I don't even want to know." "Sammy came up with most of the ideas." "Yeah, that kid made me laugh." "I think you're wrong about Sammy's message." "Jimmy..." "Sammy wanted to send the message, but he never got a chance." "He knew something like this would bring us all together." "And I can't think of a better way for him to go out than getting us all in trouble again." "This whole time we were trying to figure out what to do for Sammy, but..." "This is really about Sammy doing something for us." "No intoxication?" "As of right now, no." "And how many were there?" "Two." "Hey, guys." "Hold on." "Hey, come here." "Sir?" "All right, over here." "I want tape along the perimeter here." "See that corner over there?" "Got it." "I want that covered." "Down here as well." "Got it." "Are you serious?" "My dad's standing right there." "Your dad's the one who brought me." "Come on." "Let's go." "Should we follow them?" "Let them go." "We're almost there." "Keep your eyes peeled." "For what?" "For that." "You want a ride?" "Fuck you." "I can't do this without you." "Then why'd you fucking try, Jimmy?" "I'm an idiot." "No shit." "All right, you're also a huge piece of shit who made us each commit, like, a dozen fucking crimes." "You crashed your dad's car, and you broke your brother's arm." "Sammy wanted you here." "I know." "It's just good to know that you know." "Plus, I've always wanted to ride in an ambulance." "I'm sorry i fucked up so much." "If you want to bail, this is the time." "We've already followed your dumb ass this far." "Yeah, how much worse can it get?" "You should all hate me." "We kind of do." "Yeah, you're a fucking tool." "And a bad brother." "But it all boils down to Sammy." "The kid was an idiot, you know, telling us what to do, making us bring him things." "The motherfucker basically wrote a list of shit we had to do even after he fucking died." "We're alive, even if you almost got us killed, like, a thousand times." "We kind of like you." "Some more than others." "You'd do anything for a dead kid." "I don't know what to say." "For once, shut the fuck up." "It's all locked up." "Buckle up." "I can do it myself." "Way to man up." "Okay, so where are we gonna do this?" "50-yard line." "It's wet." "Best seats in the house." "Best seats in the house." "Whoa!" "Lump!" "Oh, please." "Come on, Jimmy." "Help me!" "Help me." "Help me." "Oh, I almost got him." "Jimmy!" "Jimmy!" "Fuck." "Fuck." "Oh." "Oh, my god." "Ohh, ohh." "You're okay." "Ow." "Ow." "Close your eyes." "Ahh." "It's okay." "You're good." "Oh, my god." "You're okay." "Quit being such a pussy." "Hey, where's Sammy?" "You okay, little man?" "Yeah." "This is it." "This is his place." "Let's grab an arm and a leg." "One..." "We have to weigh him down." "You should say it." "Say what?" "Something." "Yeah, you brought us this far, man." "Sammy." "Sammy liked his drinks to be like his dick." "Stiff." "He knew the inherent beauty of a naked woman." "Sammy wasn't afraid of anything." "He let me hang out, even though I was younger." "He only spit on me once, but he never treated me any different." "Sammy was always really good to me." "He always had my back, and he always kept me laughing," "even when he was at his worst." "Sammy was my brother." "Our brother." "He was here tonight with us every step of the way." "Now it's time for him to go." "You were my best friend." "I'm so sorry for everything." "Why did you have to die?" "How do you guys want to get home?"