"So, this Irish guy, knocks on this lady's door and says, ya know, ya got any...any work for me?" "And she say, Um... well, ya know, as a matter of fact, ya... ya can paint the porch." "About two hours later the guy comes back and says," ""I'm finished, Ma'am, but just for your information it's not a Porch, it's a BMW."" "Okay, asshole, giddy up!" "Oh, my God, feel this, baby's kicking, feel, touch it." "No, not my boob, here." "Sorry we woke you up." "It was him, this asshole." " What's this?" " I'm a little tight right now." "My shit is not layaway, I'm not J.C. Penny." " You know I'm good for it." " No, don't make like before, Vin." "Only few freaks like the belly, We have to save for maternity leave." " Hey, I like the belly, okay?" " I'll see you next Tuesday." "Extras when you do, okay... double." "This one here says the line's frozen." "Yes, we these reverse mortgages, you can only borrow a percentage of the equity you have in the house." "a percentage of the equity you have in the house." "That's call the loan to value." "But, now, since you've been getting monthly payments from us for the last... eight years, you've reached the cash out limit." "That's that loan to value thing I just mentioned." " The house it worth..." " It WAS worth... whatever it WAS worth." "I need that money." "I'm sorry, Mr. McKenna, there really nothing I can do..." " It is what it is." " It is what it is?" "Now everyone's saying that now, you know what it means?" "You're screwed and you shall remain screwed." "I wanna close this account." "So sorry to hear that, Sir, may I ask why?" "Lady, you're just a spoke on a wheel, tryin' to make a livin' like the rest of us schmucks." "I do NOT want to tell you to go fuck yourself so, let's..." "I'm closin' it, okay, let's just leave it at that, please." "Okay." "One hundred twelve dollars and fourteen cents." " I'd like small bills." " No, Sir, you're overdrawn that much." "What does THAT mean?" "You took out more money that you actually have in your account." "Here's zero, you went below zero." " So I CAN'T close this account?" " You CAN, once you get it back to zero." "Hey, you takin' care of yourself, Vince?" "Yeah, Flurry Eyes, I'm doin' aerobics, can't you tell?" "I'm doin' the Jane Fonda workout." "1, 2, 3 and stretch." "Jane is still lookin' good." "Roger, is there any chance you could ever make one of these that's strong enough for someone that's not... your sister?" " Why don't we give it a break, for a minute." " Give what a break?" "The liquor." " You're not gonna serve me?" " Don't be like that, I'm watchin' out for you here." "You watchin' out for me?" "You serve poison all day to all these people who don't know no better?" "So they can die while they're livin'?" "And you're watchin' out for me?" "You're full." "Nice." "Get up, man." "Shut up!" "People are sleeping!" "God damn." "Hey!" "What's goin' on?" "You habla English?" " Yes, we speak English, Señor." " Then what the hell you doing here?" "That's MY tree, you assholes hit... and my fence." "My damn car." " Do you speak English?" " Stay here." "Yes, Señor." " I'm calling the cops." " Is everybody okay?" " What do you want?" " I'm Maggie, I'm your new neighbor." "So?" " Well, we're moving in." " I can see that?" "Are these dip-shits with you?" "Yes, they're the men I hired from the moving company." " Oh, boy." " Oh, boy. no, oh, shit's more like it." "This fence is 20 years old, the car's 30, the tree is older than I am." "Well, I'm sorry, I'm not sure... well, I'm..." "this is not how I wanted to meet either..." "Did you do this?" "Of course they did it, what are you, stupid, look at the crime scene." "You don't have to be rude to me." "I'm just trying to move in here, I hired these guys to do it, and accidents happen." " Well, the car's an antique, missy, it's worth a lot." " And I'll take care of it." "You?" "You don't got no money, what, I mean, no offense, but you just don't look like you do." "Okay, I'm sure Chico and the man here are off the books." "No, I will sue the moving company." "You can buck-up for the fence..." "and the tree." "Fine." "Toodles." " Is that our new a neighbor?" " Yep." "It's gonna be a long life." ""Well, said the tree.", (she straightened herself up as much as much as she could"" ""well, now the stump is good for sitting and resting."" ""Come, boy, sit down, sit down and rest." And the boy did and the tree was happy." " God, that's depressing." " No, it's not..." "The tree was made to give, so, to be able to give everything and have nothing left is the best life she could ever have." "Well, your father must think I'm a tree." " How do you think..." " Nothin', nothin'." "It's good ya think good things." "C'mon, get in there." " Big day tomorrow." " Yeah, I know, first day." "Yeah, for me, too and I can't be late." " All right, it's just you and me now." " I know." "These are by δΘΣτΘP⌠ß⌠Θ which is Greek to me." "Set the alarm and make sure I don't oversleep." "Good night." "All right, here, I made you peanut butter and banana." "Thanks, Mom." "Okay, do you have your snack money in your pocket and your keys?" "Yep!" " You got your phone?" " Uh-huh." " Map?" " Yep, on the phone." " Okay, what time you get out?" " 2:45." "All right, I want you to come straight home and start your homework and" "I'll be home a couple of hours after that." "Wait, Ma, you're not gonna pick me up or anything?" "I'm in the bus lane, I'm not gonna get another ticket, Oliver... bye... be good." "Okay, a little loud, a little loud, settle down, settle down, settle down." "I know it's hard to contain yourselves when you're so, so young and full of sugar juice." "But we must concentrate on our studies or we will what?" "We will die dumb, yes, we will." "And dumbness does not play well in Heaven." "This is Oliver, Oliver is joining us mid-stream here at St. Patrick." " And we are very happy to have him, are we not?" " Welcome to St. Patrick, Oliver." "That's genuine caring, thank you, I think." "You feel touched, right?" "You feel touched by that?" "Maybe as a thank you, you can lead us all in morning prayer." " I think..." "I think I'm Jewish." " Okay, good to know." " Oliver thinks he's Jewish." " So am I." " I'm Buddhist." " There is no God." "Yeah, you get the idea, we celebrate all the religions of the world in this room, Oliver." "I'm a Catholic, which is the best of all the religions, really, because we have the most rules." "And the best clothes." "But among us, there's also a Buddhist, agnostic, we have a Baptist, and we have a I-Don't-Know, which seems to be the fastest growing religion in the world." "And now we have I-Think-I'm-Jewish. which is a new one for the class, Oliver, so thanks for that." "But it does not preclude you from giving us a morning prayer." "Let us bow our heads and pray." " Dear..." " "God"... et cetera." "Dear God, thank you?" "Amen." " Amen." " Amen, amen, thanks be to God." "All right, stirring stuff." "Well, now, Oliver, go grab yourself a seat, and everybody else, let's dust off those textbooks and go to chapter 12." "Now, Chapter 12, Catholic saints." "All right, I'm here." "I'm here, I'm ready, I'm able, let's get this, come on." "Come on!" "Dig in!" "Come on." "Come on!" "One time!" "One damn time!" "You son of a bitch." "I don't know why you get so pissy, Vinny." "You always lose... it seems like you'd be comfortable by now." "Yeah, tough day." "Help yourself." "I'm thirsty and you owe me money, Vinny." " Got a situation I'm workin' out." " You know I'm not the sole proprietor here." " I've got other people to answer to." " Just need a little time, that's all." " So, what do I tell them?" " A month." "We'll split the difference, make it two weeks." "Watch out!" "All right, how many?" "And it's TIME." "You can let go now." "Did they have physical education in the last school you went to?" "Yes." " Did you take it." " Yes, Sir." " Look who it is." " There's the strong man." " "I think I'm Jewish."" " My name's Oliver, by the way." ""My name's Oliver." You little turd, where did you come from anyway, huh?" "Hello!" "Did you guys hear the bell?" "That means to move, go to class, come on, let's go." "Can't even do a sit-up." " You need a map?" " No, Sir." "Well, you better double-time it, or you're gonna be late, let's go." "Shit." "Nice shorts." "Sir." " Take me, God, don't play with me." " It's me, Sir." " Yeah!" "What?" " I was wondering if I could use your phone?" " My phone?" " Yes." " In my house?" " Yes, Sir." "I need to call my mom, I'm locked out of the house 'cause these guys in gym class took my keys and my phone, and I can't get in... they also stole my watch..." "I don't need to hear the whole story, okay?" "One call!" "Hi, it's Maggie, can't take your call right now, please leave a message." "Hey, Mom, I lost my keys for the house, and my wallet and my phone, and" "I'm at the old guy's next door." " Sir, what's your name?" " Vincent, The Old Guy." "Vincent, The Old Guy." "The Mean One." " What's your name?" " It's Oliver, Sir." "They let you wear those shorts to school?" " It's a long story, Sir." " I'm sure it is." " Yeah?" " Hi, this is Maggie." " Oliver's mom." " You're kid's here." " Yeah, I know, I got his message, I hope that's all right." " Is what all right?" " That he stays there." " Stays here?" "Like what "stays here."?" "I'm at work, I got 3 or 4 more cases, and I'm not gonna be home for a few hours, so I'm kind of in a jam here." "You want me to babysit?" "Well, it's not... it's not like he's a baby, I mean, he's just probably gonna sit quietly and do his homework, he's... he's really easy." "Sir, is that..." "These are by δΘΣτΘP⌠ß⌠Θ which is Greek to me." " How much you payin'?" " What?" "You want me to babysit..." "I'm not a philanthropy." " Ten dollars an hour?" " Twelve!" " Okay, 12 dollars an hour, can I talk to him?" " It's for you." " He doesn't like many people." " I'm good with animals, Sir." "Yeah, he doesn't usually like people who say they're good with animals." "You never seen Abbott and Costello?" " No, Sir, are they old?" " No, they're dead." "That's the oldest you can be." "Or the youngest..." "time freezes when you're dead." " Where did you learn that?" " A book." " What book?" " A kid's book, Sir." "I doubt you'd know it." "It's dinnertime, you hungry or somethin'?" " A little, Sir." " That's figures." "You're gettin' sushi." " It's probably your mother." " Probably, Sir." " Don't get up." " Okay." "Hi, I..." "Hi..." "Vincent." " Yep." " Maggie..." "I..." "Thank you for watching him, ya know, a new job and I've lost..." " I don't need to hear the whole story." " Okay." "Oh, here." "...at 3 hours at 12..." " Thirty-six." " Yeah, yeah, I know that." " I got two twenties." " I don't have change, of course." "That's fine." "How come you don't have anyone to watch this kid after school?" " We just moved in." " Where's the father?" "We met in college and it turned out that..." "he had been seeing..." "No need to tell it, then." "You gonna pay for my fence?" " Yeah, I... yes..." "I said I was going..." " And my tree?" "I'm not sure how..." "I can pay for a branch." "Everything has a price, you're an adult, you should know that." " All right, let me know." " I can watch the kid after school... a few hours." "Same price, I can do eleven dollars an hour, you pay the snacks." "Your kid ate my last can of sardines." "Really?" "You can smell his breath." " I thought you ate at Vincent's house." " We had sushi." " You had sushi?" " Well, sardines, he calls it sushi." "Didn't want to hurt his feelings." " So, you like him?" " He's interesting." " He's sorta cool, in a grouchy sort of way." " Well, that he is." "He has a cool cat though..." "Felix." "You know, he offered to watch you after school." " He did?" " It's a horrible idea, right?" "Well, he lives right next door, you can't get closer than that." "Yeah, I..." "I had thought about that, you know, save me from having to find a babysitter." "You will be home though, right?" "Yeah I'm away from home, but sometimes late, you know," "I'm the one that has to work now, your father's not helping." "I don't know if he's ever going to, your school's not exactly cheap." "I guess he's too old to be dangerous, not too old to be too dangerous, either, if you know what I mean." " Stupid place." " Who pissed in your Cheerios?" " Can't dance no more." " Well, that's a surprise." "We need the money, Vin." " The quality of mercy is suddenly strained." " I should sue these assholes." "What the word?" "Discrimination against pregnant woman, yes?" "I think ya got a real good case." "This stupid bump is costing me much money." " He's gonna cost you a lot more pretty soon." " It's not he." " It's a she?" " How I know this?" " I look like psychic to you?" " No, you don't." " But they have technology." " Yeah, I know what they have." "But, maybe I call stripper employer and ask them to fax insurance card to pay ultrasound?" "Nyet?" "So, I suppose the question is:" "What is a saint?" "What is a saint, anybody know what a saint is?" "I don't think they do... oh, Rachele." "Individuals who display and act out with exceptional holiness." "That's pretty perfect, thank you Rachele." "Who can name a saint?" " Jeremiah." " St. Jude." " St. Jude, yes, and what is St. Jude known for?" " I think he has a hospital, right?" "And the golf tournament, right?" "That's it?" "Okay." "Anyone know any modern-day saints?" " Bridgette." " Mother Teresa." "Mother Teresa, yes, the big M.T. of the Modern Day Saints, so..." "A saint is a human being we celebrate for their commitment and dedication to other human beings, for the sacrifices that they make, for their hard work in making the world a better place for those around us and for those who will follow them." "Good night." " Maggie Bronstein?" " Hi." "Robin called in sick, got six cases backed up." "Yeah, I have to go pick up my son, though." "Sorry, I can't let you clock-out without the shift being covered... hospital policy." "Come on, coward, try to sell me somethin'." "You evil witch, I'm gonna listen to your whole God damned spiel, and then I'm gonna hang up." " Vincent, it's Maggie." " Maggie?" "That's a good one." "Is it Maggie from Calcutta or is it Maggie from New Delhi?" "No, it's your neighbor, Maggie." "What the hell you want?" "Let's go!" " You better buckle-up." " You're not buckled." "My life is my problem." " This is the way home?" " No." " Hey, let's lay down some S.O.P." " I don't know what S.O.P. means, Sir." "Standard Operating Procedure." "You go where I go, you do what I say, get your homework done somewhere along the way," "But most importantly, you DON'T annoy me, I'm not happy when I'm annoyed." "Are you annoyed right now?" " Not particularly." " Really?" "Here's a dime, call your mom, tell her you're wearing your seatbelt." "It costs more than a dime." " Since when?" " Since before I was born." "What is this country comin' to?" "Here, if the cost's more than that, call collect." "Hey!" "Look!" "It's dipshit." "You live in this neighborhood?" "I'll probably got detention because of you, asshole." "You probably got detention because you took my stuff." "How do you know I took it, you NARC!" "He's got flat feet." "Shut up!" "Ya got him." "Dipshit, you make some of the teachers ask you what happened, you don't say anything, you got it?" " Get off me." " No!" "I don't care!" " So, you can go cry to your mommy." " What are you shit-heels doin'?" " Is that you Robert Ozinski?" " No, Sir." " My name's John." " Bullshit, you little prick!" "You're Briana's kid." "The only Puerto Rican Polack in Brooklyn." "Well, I got a deal for you little bully, shit-heels, whatever you do to this guy here, I'm gonna do to your mothers." "Do you understand?" "And in the meantime... ride this." "Get outta here, you little..." "get outta here, get movin' you little shits!" "What?" "Are you waiting for a paper invitation?" " Who taught you to slap?" " I don't know, Sir, instinct, I guess." "Yeah, well, you need to un-learn that." " I'm allergic, Sir." " To what?" "Cigarette smoke." "Your father never taught you to defend yourself?" "No, Sir, he's a pacifist." "Well, this country wasn't founded by tree huggers, that's for sure." " You need to defend yourself or you get mowed down." " I'm small, if you haven't noticed." " Yeah, so was Hitler." " That's a HORRIBLE comparison." "Indeed!" "Making a point, though." "Small means nothing, it's what's in here." "Or here, Sir." "Okay, pal, grab the basket." "This place is like a mansion." " When we get in there, no talkin'." " Where are we going?" "Ya know, this is a great chance for you to practice no-talkin'." "C'mon." " Sorry I'm late." " There you are, Doctor." " Nice to see you, Sandy, how you feelin'?" " Today is my birthday." "Okay, happy birthday, what are you, seventeen?" "Oh, would you put those things in those drawers?" "All right, Sandy, let's see how the old ticker's workin'." "Can you tell them I don't like the green beans when they put the bacon bits chopped up in there with them?" "It's too greasy for me." "Will do, Sandy." "Well, as near as I can tell, you're still beautiful." "Perhaps you require a second opinion from my associate." "Beautiful." "You know we can do the laundry here, Vin, we have a service." " It gives me somethin' to do." " Who's your helper?" " He's eleven bucks an hour." " It's Oliver, actually." "Nice to meet you, Oliver, I'm Anna." " Hi." " Hi." " Okay, thanks." " Okay." "Oh, wait, she don't like the string beans." " I'll make a note, Vin, what's she prefer." " Broccoli, broccoli's good." " Okay, great." " Take care, Vin." "And... time!" " Okay, well, that's just gonna get you beat up pretty bad." " I don't want to fight, anyway." "Well, nobody wants to fight, you really think I wanted to go to war?" "You think and 18 year old kid wants to sit in a rice patty with bullets whizzing' by his head?" " When was that?" " Vietnam." " You were there?" " I think I'm imagining' it." "All right, I'm gonna show you one thing, it's probably your best shot, if you do it right, ya can break the guy's nose." " Break his nose?" " Relax, you're not gonna get it right." "All right, okay." "He's bigger than you, so you get down below him like this, you squat like this, this crouch, then you stand up really hard and you push all the way through your legs, all the way up, in your" "shoulders, your butt, everything pushes up, and you push all the way through that arm and you go WHACK right in the snoot." "All right, try it on me." "Ya ready?" "Okay, but ya gotta do it faster than that, right?" " Maggie Bronstein?" " I have mace!" "I've got papers, Kings County Family Court." "As they say, "You've been served."" "Yeah, I'm gonna work some extra hours, so, I'm gonna cover it." "I wasn't offering' a discount." " So, whatdya been cryin' about?" " It's a long story." " What's the punch line?" " My ex wants custody." "There goes my job security." "Thanks, you asshole." "That could've gone either way." "It's gonna be cold for a second, okay?" " See there, that's the baby's head." " This is very big head." " Maybe good, no?" " It's the biggest part at this age." "And these are her little legs." " She?" " You didn't know?" " Sorry, did you not want to know?" " No, it's good to know." " I couldn't verify with your Insurance, Mr. McKenna." " We are just married." " That happened." " Really?" "Yeah, I told Insurance, ya know how slow they are?" "I mean, the bureaucracy, and the paperwork." "I mean, what is Gobey runnin', anyway?" " Twenty dollars." " This is good price, no?" "For you, only the best." " You're worth it." " Thank you, Sugar Doll." "You owe me lady." " Here." " Um-hmm." " See ya later, take care of yourself." " Okay, all right." "Oh, hi, Mom." " What are you doing?" " Mowing Vin's lawn." "Hey!" "Vin!" " I was sleeping, thanks for that." " Why is he mowing your dirt patch?" " Oh, yeah, he's paying me hourly." " I'm showing him how the world works." " You work, you get paid, you drink." " Are you drinking alcohol?" "I honestly don't remember." "All right, let's go, I'm gonna make dinner, you can do homework." " Oh, I already ate." " You're mowing dirt, let's go." "He's fed, the homework's checked, I've done my job, I'm takin' a break." " Pay day tomorrow." " Okay, come on..." "let's..." "leave it, leave it, there's no grass." "Bye, Vin." " You're out." " Good luck." "Get ready for a red ass, little shit-bag." "Say the prayer, you little pussy." "What's happened, what happened here?" " I do not know." " You don't know!" " It's not my fault." " Let me see." "You asshole, dick-bag, son of a whore!" " Who are you?" " Who are you?" " I am Daka, who are you?" " I'm Oliver." "Oliver... hmm." " Why you bang this door so much?" " He's hard of hearing." "Let him in!" "Don't yell at me." "You broke his nose?" "Yes, Sir, I think so, there was blood everywhere, you should've seen it." "I wish I had..." "You must've got him just right.. show me." " You teach him fighting?" " He's a little runt." "Ya know, he gotta learn how to defend himself." "Fighting is for assholes." " Where's my money?" " It's on the dresser." " Minus the co-pay." " You don't teach children." "Look at you." "Break his nose." "Who is she?" " A "lady of the night"." " What's that?" "It's one of the more honest ways to make a living." "The board tells us the action for the day, race number, who's running, who's riding, and so forth." " What's twenty slash one?" " That's odds." "Some bookie out of Vegas thinks that horse has a 1 in 20 chance of winning." " What do you get if he does?" " Twenty times your money." " That's a good deal." " If you win, sure." " That one with the wraps is a dog." " Doesn't sound like a compliment." "Not for a horse, the odds of him winning are astronomical." "Long odds, bigger pay-off, we should take him across the board." "Don't get ahead of yourself, kid." " Are you praying?" " Praying?" " That's what it looks like." " I thought we talked about you not talking." "What's a trifecta?" "You pick three horses, 1, 2, 3 in the order they finish." " High risk and reward." " Sounds improbable." "Well, if you're gonna gamble, you might as well have a chance to win big." "Harvey Knows Best, Sweeter Lady, Champagne Flute... 1,2,3." "Eight hundred to one." " You got any money?" " Sure." "Seven dollars." " What is that, lunch money?" " Yes, Sir." "Well, you might as well learn the hard way." "I'll throw in some too, that's called mitigation." " What's "mitigation"?" " That's where you throw in 7, and I throw in 3." "Come on, come on." "This is really cool." "Do not stop!" "Don't stop!" "Don't stop!" "Don't stop!" "It isn't fair!" "It's not fair!" "We won... didn't we?" "Just roll with it, just roll with it, man, just roll with it, like you didn't win it." " Shot!" " No!" "No!" "It didn't work for me." "Do you understand me?" "We... we didn't win at all, we didn't win anything, okay?" "Good afternoon." "Mr. McKenna." "I need to open up a savings account for grandson." "And this'll get my account up to zero." "Close me out while you're tapping away over there." "Don't ever become a pencil-pusher, kid, they're spineless." "Hello, Mrs. Bronstein, this is Dan O'Brien, Principal here at St. Patrick." "A few days ago, your son Oliver was involved in a fight at school." " We tried to reach you..." " What?" "If you're a telemarketer, please leave a message so I can NOT return your call." "Vin?" "Vin?" "Oliver?" "Oliver, it's Mom, pick up." "Hello?" " You want another?" " Yes, please." "Go for it, we're livin' today." " Excuse me, Sir." " You kids, pimp small-talkers." "There's no point in yappin', 'cause no one's listenin'" " Let's hear it." " Excuse me, Sir!" "Ya can't get nothin' in this world without bein' heard." " Another coke, please." " You can hit me, too, Rog." "We're out of your bourbon, ya cleaned me out." " Don't lie to me, be a man." " Vin!" "And he's not supposed to be sittin' at the bar." "You're right, we're gonna go somewhere else to spend our money." "Hey, he's only doin' his job, Dead Man, be nice." "Damn." " Amber, get the first aid kit." " It's just a cut, I got lots of 'em." "Yeah, here." " You're bleedin' all over the bar." " That's fine, kid's gotta do homework." "Come on, let's go." "Hi, Mom." " Where were you, where the hell's your car, Vin?" " It broke down." " It broke down." " Oh, it broke down, really!" "I don't appreciate you taking him anywhere without asking me." " Whoa, this is gonna be fun." " Can you not be a smart-ass, just for once, okay?" "I want to know where my son is at all times, okay?" " We just went to eat." " He should starve?" "Go in the house, Oliver." " Mom." " Go in the house, Oliver" " Good night, Vin." " Yeah, we'll see about that." "You know he's getting into fights at school, did you know that?" "Yeah, he mentioned something like that." "Yeah, well, he didn't mention anything to me about it." "Oh, well, maybe you haven't noticed, but you haven't been home much." "It's kinda difficult to have a conversation with someone that's not here." "Oh, we're going to do that?" "God, I love when somebody like you tells somebody like me advice, especially on parenting." "I didn't sign on for the hormones, deary, so that's gonna cost you 15 bucks an hour." "You know why you never had kids?" "Because you don't want to think about anybody other than yourself." "What do you know about me?" "Really?" "Tell me, I'd love it." "Nothing, I don't know a thing about you, just the way you want it, and then you can act like a prick and it keeps everybody away." " "If it ain't broken..."" " It is broken, Vin, take a look at it." "Oh, all right, I'm at forty hours for this week, at forty-one I go to time and a half." "Excuse me, someone gonna pay me?" "You gotta be kidding me." " I can't even say these words." " They're creative." "That's one way to put it." "Adjusting to a new school is tough on children at this age, at any age, really, and I don't want to minimize that...but is there anything else going on that we should be aware of?" " Oh, I wouldn't even know where to start." " How about his father?" " Well, I don't want to take up all your time." " We have all the time." "We're in the middle of a divorce." "Oliver's father was having an affair with his assistant, and their accountant," "And my hairdresser, while she was still doing my hair, so that was fun." "And now he's filed for custody for Oliver... full custody and he won't pay any support until he gets what he wants." " Plus, he's a lawyer." " Shit." "So, I just had to get out of there as fast as I could and I took Oliver with me." "And I got a job at Mission Hills, I'm a C.A.T. scan tech, so I just see really rough stuff all day." "You know, cancer and tumors and cysts and clots and I see what I'm looking at but I can't tell you know, the people that are laying there, so, that's miserable all day," "and I work really late, because I'm trying to get our act together." "That's why he's here, so he can have a good education." "And I'm trying to give him a semi-normal life, and I'm dealing with this shit from David, and..." "I'm really am sorry about swearing." "I know he didn't even want kids..." "he didn't want him." "He's just doing this so I'm not happy." "You know Oliver's adopted?" "Did you know that?" "I don't know how you would be..." "he is, and..." "I cannot have kids." "You know, something about my fallopian tubes being twisted..." "I think... what I REALLY think is that they were just recoiling from David's sperm." "I... can... just have one... thank you." "So, uh... to think that all of this has permeated, you know, Oliver's whole, little being, right?" "I mean... it'd have to, he's like a little..." "like a little sponge." "My real name's Robert, Ozinski's my last name." "People called me that ever since Gary called me that last year, now everyone calls me that." "We can't go around 'em:" ""Hey, Dubois, don't call me Ozinski, my name's Robert."" "Now I spend my whole life doin' that." " You takin' a whiz?" " Sorry, can't hold it." "Robert was my dad's name, I'm a Junior." "He's not around, though, I don't really know him 'cause he left when I was a baby." "Yeah, my dad's not around either, he did some bad things to my mom and so we left and I haven't seen him in a while." "I kinda miss him, though, my Mom's being a jerk." "They do that, man." " Your dad the one that taught ya how ta fight?" " No, my babysitter." "The tide comes in twice a day, Doctor." "Yeah, that's a tide, comes and goes." "I can't wait for Autumn, they plant the most beautiful mums all around the water." "Every color you can imagine." "I don't know where they get them all." "At the garden store." "You've always been so funny, Vin." "Vin." "Vin, it's Vin, Sandy." "The ducks eat them, though." "We have to shoo them away, it such a shame." "It's a shame." "There's plenty of affordable health care options, Vin." "I'm sure you know that, Sunnyside is pricey, not for everyone." "My Sandy gets the best, I just..." "I'll just have to figure it out." "I understand that, but you're months behind and we are not in the credit business, as you know." "What's that mean?" "We need payment in full and three months in advance." " Got it." " By next week." " Next week?" " Yeah, next week." "Well, I can give you 20 percent." "In good faith?" "Vin, we're passed good faith, I'm sorry." "We will transfer Sandy wherever you want to put her." "Put her?" "That's it?" "Or we get the boot?" "Idon'tthinkthat'sthebest way to phrase what's happening." "Okay, what's the best way to phrase it?" "It is what it is." " Let's get some new plants for the room, okay?" " I can have the desk order somethin'." " Well, I was hopin' maybe for mums." " Sure." "And ah... here's a little somethin' for your trouble." "No!" "Vin!" "This is my job, I take care of people, please." "You go WAY beyond your job, Anna, you've been an angel to my Sandy." " Okay, Vin, we don't make it habit now, okay?" " It can't happen, I'm shit broke." "Ya got a nice smile, ya should do it more often." "I'll get the laundry." "There ya go." " It's a lot lighter." " She didn't change much this week." "Well... easy on my back." " Thanks." " Behave yourself, Vin." "He'll pay hundred dollars." "A hundred dollars, I pay more than that for one prescription." "He said, this is for epilepsy, for prostate flaring and to soften the shitting." " That should add some value." " For who?" "You?" "We need the..." "I need the dough." "I... 500 bucks!" " This is all high-dollar shit." " He said one hundred, Vin." "You take it or leave it, you can't sell this to get high." "I'll take the hundred." "Oh, you take the hundred." "Stupid." " Your account's closed, Mr. McKenna." " Yeah, I know that." "This withdraw is on my grandson's account, I think I'm on it." " How much, Sir?" " What's the balance?" "Twenty-seven hundred." " I'll take all of it." " How'd you like that?" "Hundreds, please." "It's twenty-seven hundred, Larry," "I want a four hundred and fifty dollar trifecta box in the third, okay." "One, two, three." "Lucky Lincoln, New Dime, Sammy's Saving." "Thank you, Sir." " This is gonna make it all better." " Okay." "You all right, hon?" "No, I'm not." "You must think I'm not a very serious person, Vinny." " You have no right to be here!" " You find anything good?" "Naw, some old jewelry, not worth much." " That's my wife's, you son of a bitch." " You owe me money." "Come on, Vinny!" "Why do you always have to do things the hard way?" " It's more interesting." " And a lot more painful." "All right, let's do." " This son of a bitch is crazy." " Don't kill him, but bring him close to it." "What the...?" " What are you doing, old man?" " He's dyin', boo." "No he's not, he's..." "Don't touch nothin', let's just go." "Vin, it's Maggie, we're gonna put you in this machine, and we're gonna take some tests" " and it's not gonna hurt a bit." " He can't understand you, Maggie." "Okay, there he is, there he is, okay, it's just gonna be a couple of minutes." " There's my brave, little man." " Is he okay?" "I thought he was dead." " He's flyin', then." " Yeah, that's what it looks like." " He looks like that when he's drunk, too, so..." " I don't even know what you're doin' anymore." "I know what I'm doin', your father's gonna have a field day with this." "I wouldn't..." "I wouldn't be here instead of with you if it wasn't for him, ya know, I'm gonna get..." "Mom, we're doin' good, you're working hard every day, and we need the money." "It's all right." "What's wrong with him, anyway?" "Vinny's had a stroke." "Slowly!" "Down, down, down, down, down, good." "Bend the knees, flat back, good, good." "Bend the knees, a little bit, a little bit." "All right, all right, good." "I chose St. William of Rochester, the patron saint of adopted children." "It's a pretty interesting story, all the other saint I looked at were all so... saintly, I guess." "What does "saintly" mean to you?" "I don't know, I don't really believe in saints and all that." "I feel like St. William just got to be a saint because he's killed by the boy he adopted." "These days, people get killed all the time, and they don't get to be a saint for it." "All right, well, thanks, Oliver." "Despite young Oliver's reticence, I DO happen to believe there are saints all around us today." "They may never be considered as such by a religion, but they are just as important as the ones in your textbooks." "Thus, you are going to research someone you know, or know of, and determine if they have the qualities fit for sainthood." " Where is he?" "His car is here." " He's in the hospital." "For what?" " So, how did you and Vincent know each other?" " I'm working for this man." "Oh!" "Doing what?" "Working." "I work for dancer." "Sounds exciting." "Try to sound it out." "Not quite." "You didn't lose your sense of humor." " Hey!" "Vincent!" "You got some visitors." " I stay five minutes only." "Hospital is shit place." "You look a lot better, Vin." "What'd ya say?" "Vince." "How about we just give Vin some time to do his therapy." "Thank you." "It'll be about an hour." " Go to hell." "An hour." " Maybe less." "Why are you so mean, you could stop breathing." "Asshole." " Okay, how 'bout we... hey, we get him a snack, want a snack?" " Thanks, I'm starving." "Ya know, they does things that his muscles and his mouth'll respond to therapy." "So, that's good." " He sounds..." " Like the retard." "Well, he's still good man anyway, so the retard is not that far." "Do you have dollar, I'm starving, I eat nothing today?" " Here, I probably have something." " Yeah." "Maybe dollar half is better." " All right." " Spasiba." "Is that Vince's...?" " baby?" " Yeah." "I'd like to stay away from the whole situation." " It's not polite to ask a woman if she's pregnant." " Well, I think it's pretty obvious that she' pregnant." "Vin's like 90 something, Mom..." "If you kick this machine, its first candy drops, you can get two to come down, it's good, no?" "Thank you." "Well, cocksucker." "Don't eat fast, stupid cat." "I..." "I will want fresh crap." ""Crab", not "crap"." "Crab." "Not "crap"." "Okay." "Money." "No, it's a... it's a "t"... tree." "You owe me money." "No, you broke my tree." " Yeah, I know..." " Yeah, you broke my fence, too." "Are you planting these?" " Here, this should be familiar." " Cactus." "No, "prick"." "Big prick." "Wonderful, wonderful." "Daka is beautiful." "I know you just want special massage or something..." "dance later, don't try charm me, it doesn't work." "Don't worry, okay, it's going to get better." "Now, I've got to stay calm." "I'm sorry." "Where's all my dirt?" "Keep clean this house." " What's all that?" " Vegetables." "Get out of that!" "You don't know this vegetables?" "I do, but..." "I don't eat..." "I don't eat 'em." "You do now, and you pay me for the hours now, papa, okay?" " What... for?" " I take care of you." "And we don't bump the ugly parts no more, okay, so don't ask, you're too old for this and I'm too fat." "Fifteen dollars for the hours plus room and food." " I get my secret pickles?" " Okay." " Who is Vincent McKenna?" " Do you know him?" "Just... he's... he's a neighbor, and he sometimes watches Oliver." "Your Honor, he is my client's neighbor, he occasionally watches Oliver sometimes." "He's your babysitter?" "He's worth it, I pay him, Oliver, ya know, goes over there for a few hours after school..." "I'm still at work." "He's a babysitter, Your Honor, of sorts, a paid position." " May I ask why this is relevant?" " Is your client aware that Mr. McKenna takes her son to the racetrack and they gamble?" "He also take him to a local bar." " We went to the horses... a few times." " A few times?" "Is that fun?" " A little." " Yeah?" "Good." "I... this is... completely news to me..." "I never heard this before." "My client is unaware of these events... as am I, which is a big surprise, right now." "I'll bet there are quite a few surprises in this folder then." "Oh, God." "Daka Paramova." "Are you aware of her occupation?" "She works for Vince?" "She works for Vince, right?" " She's The Lady of the Night." " What?" " Do you know what that means?" " She works at night?" "She'd pay me a part of it." "Your Honor, I need a few minutes to confer with my client." "I imagine you do." "I guess gambling in a racetrack is like math class, huh, you gonna learn how to bet." "The odds." " The bar, guess that could fall under "current events", right?" " More like "social studies"." "It's the strip club hooker I can't seem to get my head around." ""Commerce"?" ""Biology"?" "Just stop talking..." "don't talk." "Why do you people think my people can't hear?" "What kind of a man takes a child to the bar and to the racetrack?" "And has him hangin' out with a prostitute?" "What kind of mother lets her son hang out with a man like that?" "You're an asshole, Vin." "Fifty-fifty custody with his asshole dad and I have you to thank for that." "You have no one but yourself to blame for that." "He needs more than a deadbeat mother." "Good one." "Maybe I deserve that, I don't know what the hell I was thinkin' lettin' him hang out with you." "My sentiments exactly." "Well, he's not comin' over there anymore, that's a given, and I'll get your money for your stupid tree." " There'll be some interest." " Yeah, good luck with that." "Oh, I'm sorry... sorry." " My reaction time's much slower these days" " Yeah, you were never fast... just stupid." "You have seven new messages." "Hello, Vin, this is Anna here..." "from Sunnyside." "I'm afraid we have some bad news regarding your wife, Sandy, Sir.." "Please call us as soon as you get this." "Vin?" "Hello, it's Anna again, at Sunnyside." "We haven't heard back from you regarding Sandy." "Please call us right away." "Vincent, we've left a few messages for you... haven't heard back." "We really need to hear from you about Sandy." "Please call or come by as soon as possible." "Here we go, Vin." "All of Sandy's personal items are in there." " My wife, where is she?" " She died, Vin." " I know that, where is she?" " She's in there." " Where?" " In the box." "Her remains, Vin." "She died a few weeks ago." "We tried contacting you several times." "And when we didn't hear back from you, we decided to go ahead with your death directives, you wanted her cremated." " She's in that box?" " Her remains are, Vin." "Yes, in a box... inside that box." "I am sorry for your loss, Vin." "This place is peace." "It was." " Naw, I study." " I never study." " Okay, I'll see ya later." " Yeah, see ya later, man." " All right." " Later, Oliver." " Hey, ya got a lot of homework?" " No, arts and math." " Is she with us?" " Yeah, she's your father's idea of secret child care." " What's her name?" " You have a voice, you ask her." " Excuse me, what your name?" " Emelda." " Hi, Emelda." " Hola, Mr. Oliver." "Is she every day?" "And every other weekend when you're gonna go to your Dad's." "It's what it's gonna be now, bub, you're gonna get shuffled back and forth between me and him." "Well, he is my dad." "I know he cheated on you a of bunch of times and that's why we left him." "Really?" "How do you know that?" "You'll tell anybody who'll listen..." "Grandma, Aunt Judy, all the cousins." "How's your Facebook status?" "Ya know, I've been meaning to change that, I..." " should just say I'm single." " Yeah, that's better." " My replacement?" " Yeah, I guess so." "I'd hate to have to report your mother to immigration and natur..." "I am a citizen." "Mr. Oliver, one minute." " What's in the box?" " My wife." " She died?" " No." "She shrunk herself, she's livin' in there now." "Rent free." "Sorry, Vin..." "for your loss." "Never understood why people say that." "They don't know what else to say." "How about: "What was she like?", "Do you miss her?"or "What are you gonna do now?"" "Do yourself a favor, get a life." "Stop livin' mine." "Take my word, it's not workin' for shit for me." " That's not true." " What the hell do you know about me?" "You don't know me, you're just stupid." "Of course I'm stupid." "Mostly for thinking you're more that just a drunk, mean, old man." "Guess that's goodbye." "You're sad." "I loved you to the moon there, Sandy." "A June moon." "All right, 2 weeks, 2 weeks to Are Saints Among Us assembly." "The grand culmination of your sizable efforts on one great stage." "Don't forget to invite your parents, significant others, et cetera, wives, girlfriends, and enjoy yourselves, and no expletives in your presentation please Ozinski." "He doesn't like Ozinski, Brother Geraghty, never has." "My names Robert, Sir." " He didn't tell you he was a soldier?" " No, Sir." "A sergeant major of all things, he's famous." "But it's too expensive," "I don't know how to..." "... it's cheap enough." " Oh!" "This one, this is good." " Ma'am, I'm sorry, this is the wrong price." "No, no, no, I like this." "I love this." "Can we get this?" "We can afford this." " Ma'am..." " I like this!" "I want this!" "Can we take?" "Okay, I'll take it." " That's the old guy?" " Yeah, he was in Vietnam." " Did I study the States?" " It's a country." "States are inside countries." ""Do not place items with string around child's neck,"" ""such as hoods, strings, or pacifier cords."." ""Strings can cause strangulation."" "I don't want this crib." "Hey, Dad." " Have a good day?" " Yeah." "Seat belt, please." " How long has Vin been doin' Sandy's laundry?" " Oh, geez, every week for 8 years." " That's a long time." " It IS a long time." "He's a good guy..." "Vin." " What's Vin like when I'm not around?" " He don't like people, people don't like him." "Except cat and you." "Why you like him?" "Oh, it'll be straight." "Oliver, come on!" "Breakfast is ready!" "Gonna get cold!" "Let's go!" " Hi, Mom." " Don't look so surprised, sit down." "Need some fuel for your big day, right?" "Sit." " You made all this?" " Yes, I made it all, I know how to cook." " I took the day off." " Thanks." "You're welcome, Bub." "Did you have any trouble?" "Come here, I'll show you the trick." "You gotta pop this up." "Okay." " Now that's magic." " I love you, Mom." "Me, too." "Sit down, okay, coffee or juice?" " Latte." " Nice try." " My water is broken!" " Call a plumber." "Let's go!" "Get up!" "Hello..." "sit down children, thank you." "Good morning, welcome to Are Saints Among Us assembly at St. Patrick." "And the children have been working very hard." "And it'll be interesting to see which parents they have chosen as saints." "I'm sure you're all very nervous." "Our first speaker is Keesha Demorsey." "For my real-life saint, I picked Mother Teresa of Calcutta." " This... it's..." " Okay, okay." "Stop anywhere, anywhere." "When will you become like man?" "Jesus, my manhood!" "St. Nicolas of Sunny Side, everybody." "All right, next up we have Oliver Bronstein..." "Oliver Bronstein." ""Saints are human beings we celebrate for their commitment and dedication to other human beings."" "Brother Geraghty, circa, around March." " This isn't the hospital." " So, now you're a rocket surgeon." "Come on, get inside." "For my modern-day saint I chose a man who shares many of the same qualities as St. William of Rochester." "On the surface, one might think my saint is the least likely candidate for sainthood." "He's not a happy person." "He doesn't like people and not many people like him." "He's grumpy, he's angry, he's mad at the world, I'm sure full of regrets." "He drinks too much, he smokes, he gambles, curses, lies and cheats." "And he spends a lot of time with the Lady of the Night." "That's what you see at first glance." "If you dig deeper you see a man beyond his faults." "Mr. Vincent McKenna was born in 1946 in Sheepshead Bay the son of first generation Irish immigrants." "Growing up poor on the streets of Brooklyn," "Vincent learned all the things that kids shouldn't need to know:" "Fighting, cursing and gambling." "In 1965, as a member of the United States Army 5th Regiment," "Vincent was among the four hundred and fifty soldiers dropped into La Drang Valley and immediately ambushed by 2000 enemy troops." "There he heroically saved the lives of two wounded officers pinned down by enemy fire." "And carried them to safety." "Has was awarded the bronze star for his bravery." "I imagine the best way to tell you who Mr. Vincent McKenna is is to tell you what he's done for me." "When me and my mom first moved here, we knew no one." "And Mr. McKenna took me in." "When he didn't have to, and most likely, didn't want to... but he did it anyhow, 'cause THAT'S what saints do." "We visited his wife, Sandy, of 40 years, who recently passed away." "Vin's done her laundry EVERY week for the past 8 years, long after she no longer recognized him." "Because saints never give up." "He taught me how to fight, how to stand my ground and be brave, how to speak up and be bold." "Because saints fight for themselves and others, so that they might be heard." "He taught me how to gamble, horse racing, Keno, the Over and Under, which is a big reason why I'm grounded 'til I'm eighteen." "But in that I learned how to take risks and go for broke." "Because in life the odds can be stacked against you." "This is Vin's cat, Felix, who eats gourmet cat food while Vin eats sardines." "'Cause saints make sacrifices." "Yes, Mr. Vincent McKenna is flawed, seriously flawed," "But just like the all the other saints we studied, because, after all, saints are human beings... very human beings." "Courage, sacrifice, compassion, humanity." "These are the markings of a saint and what makes Mr. Vincent McKenna not so far removed from St. William of Rochester." "And with that, I'd like to present my friend and babysitter," "Mr. Vincent McKenna, for sainthood, and hereby proclaim him St. Vincent of Sheepshead Bay." " Thank you, Sir." " Thank you, kid." "St. Vincent from Sheepshead Bay." "Wait, I got it, I owe you money anyhow." "What are you lookin' at?" " Hard Pretzels." " That's just what I was lookin' at." "If you hit it just right, you end up with..." "TWO for the price of one." " Pretty cool." " That's pretty good, kiddo." " I might have to adopt that." " Mr. McKenna, it's about that time." "All right, hold your horses." "Though, technically, that's stealing." "You don't cry, it's okay..." "So, what is it?" "Black?" "White?" "Ugly?" "I like this baby." " You like this baby?" " Yeah... so far." "I'm..." "I'm so happy." "You know it's a special present, yeah?" "I'll teach you." "It is not Russian, but..." "Sorry, cat!" " You must eat vegetables." " It's colorful, I'll say that." " I like the green beans." " You do?" "Yeah, I don't think you ever get enough spaghetti and green beans." " My Mom eats 'em out of a can." " That's how your brain got stilted." " Oh, you have stilted brain." " That's probably good." " Like the retard" " Hey, the "r" word's not cool." " It's not politically correct." " Why is this?" " Except when you say "midget"." " Midget?" "Why not midget?" "This food beats hunger... by a hair." " Don't you want to say somethin'?" " Like what?" "Like a blessing or a prayer." "Naw, I better not." "The baby is crying tears." "You... in wet clothes." "There, everyone has been fed except you, huh?" "Oh, it's chill... it's a bit chilly in here."