"What are you doing?" "!" " Who do you think you are?" " Cheeseburger." " Get behind me, kid." " Stop yelling at him." " Move it." "What's up, dude?" "Just chill." " Look, that guy's a nervous wreck." " You can't be serious?" " Where're you going?" " There's a line here!" " Tell it like it is, pops." " No, no, no!" "Who are you calling pops?" "Beat it!" " Sit down." " Quiet!" "Get to the end of the line." "Oh, my heavens!" "It's terrible!" "It's not our fault you're so slow." "Get a better ride, and you won't look so stupid!" " They already made a fool of you." " We'll see who the fools are." "Adios!" "Bastards..." " Good afternoon." " For who?" " What do you want?" " Cappuccino and a pie." " Nothing for you?" " No." "VIRGINITY SUCKS" "Chicks want a guy to be attractive." " Especially his wallet." " For example." " You guys ever been to a whorehouse?" " Have you?" " Bull!" " Of course, man, just look at him." "Matter of fact, I was with whores 14 whole days." " Like when?" " During our plumbing internship." "Wipe your mouth, man, you got cheeseburger on it." " You're a dork." " Plumbing, man." " You're a dork." "Hey, but that chick in the Benz at McDonald's was hot." " That old fart had to be her father." " Her grandfather, man!" "She was nice, but Angelina Jolie, Angelina Jolie..." "Know what I mean?" " Angelina Jolie?" " She's the hottest." " Besides Jirka Nohejl." " Sure, why not?" "Can you imagine Angelina Nohejl?" "Move it, I gotta wash my hands." " A little warm water..." " Hey, try the shower." " No way!" " No problem, man." "Hey, a brush!" "Scrub it all off." " What are those idiots doing?" " God, Honza, come with me." "What are you doing?" " Just let me try the bidet." " Leave him alone!" "Get lost, you assholes." "Man, what a hard ass." "Vashek, don't blame me." "This was grandma's idea, so be good." "One more, one more..." "Now wish for something." "If you blow them all out your wish will come true." " What did you wish for, Vashek?" " To become a plumber." "Well..." "Just a minute..." "Grandpa?" "Grandma and I want to wish you good health, and straight A's in school." " Here's a little something from us." " Thanks." "I wonder what it is." "Balaton." "Two weeks at camp on Lake Balaton." "Some people have all the luck." "I guess we'll have to go on vacation all by ourselves." "We'll manage, right?" " Say thank you, Vashek." " Thank you." "What a couple of amateurs you are." "Is it my fault my folks rented out our cottage?" "Tell me about it, man." "I'm being deported to Lake Balaton." "I'd gladly go someplace alone." "I need to get out in the open, not just rot here like some loser." "I'm going with you." "We'll find some dump to stay in." "Like they say:" "There's no disgrace like home." "Hey, I'll try to work things out." "I don't wanna miss out;" "we'd have a blast." " And we'll hump all day!" " You boys ought to be ashamed." "Trees, man!" "STRAIGHT F'S" " Got a cigarette?" " Sure." "My dad says I'm going to end up like you." "Homeless." "Hey, can you do something for me?" "Okay, pretend to be my dad." "Thanks." "Honza's parents wouldn't care, but Jirka's from the upper crust." "I bet your parents won't like your five D's and three C's." "Chill out, guys." "This is the 21st century." "Why panic when there's no fire?" "Right, man?" "Thanks a lot, dude." " Hi." " Hi, guys." " All together?" " Yeah." " How long?" " Maybe a half-hour." " Yeah, a half-hour is fine." " Number four, please." " Thanks." "Do we pay before or after?" " When you're done." " Thanks." "No one cares about first year grades anyway." "Except mommy and daddy, but they just stick it in a drawer." "If it weren't for the C in English I'd be on the honor role!" "Thanks, Honza." "They're all old folks, so be good and help out." "Open doors and carry bags, okay?" "Brush your teeth and, please, change your socks at least once." " Bye." " Bye." "Take from the rich and give to the poor, right?" "Bye." "Make a face." " Girls!" "Girls!" " Wait, please!" " Hey, wait!" "Thanks for helping us, Jirka." "Whenever you need our help just ask for it..." " Beer!" " We'll take two, sir." "Who did you vote for?" " The Right, of course." " Good answer." " Cheers!" " Cheers!" ""We're at the river and it's great." "We found a great pub and we're toasting you with a beer." "Honza and Jirka."" "Can I get out, please?" " The young man needs to pee!" " He needs to pee!" "What a great way to start vacation." "Let's stay here." "There's chicks everywhere and the beer is great." " We just need a place to sleep." " Well, there is a solution." "And if you agree, we could live like kings." " Spit it out, dude." " Your parents left Prague, right?" "My mom and dad went to Paris on business for 3 weeks." " Would you mind being an orphan for a couple days?" " Not at all!" "Like to go to Prague for a couple weeks?" " What would I do there?" " You could take in the sights." "Or just hang out at a pub, like you do here." "The place you'd stay is a beautiful luxury villa." "What do you say?" "The main thing is, it's absolutely free." "How'd you hear about it?" "A beautiful place and a quiet neighborhood full of celebrities." "Yeah, I know that part of Prague;" "I was born there." "But the old lady and I don't go there much anymore." "Just for day trips to go shopping, then right back home." "I'd like to go but I don't know if the old lady would." "Vashek's coming, that's great!" " Hey there!" " Hi." " Here's to success!" " This is totally great." " You're pretty cool, man." "During this vacation..." "What're you looking at?" "Why are you laughing?" " During this vacation, I want..." " What?" " I want to." " It's obvious, right, man?" " Yeah, but with who?" "Maybe I already know who." " We already clinked glasses." " We did?" "Twice is better than once." "I heard you're an orphan." "I am too." "I'm sure you'll like it here." "The pond is really close and we go skinny dipping at night." "My parents bought it but just left it as it is." "But you can live here;" "there's water and electricity." " Do you live here all alone?" " No, I live at my aunt's place." "There's not enough room for you there, but there's plenty of space for everyone here." "Only luxurious athletes there, in the monuments..." "And doctors..." "Politicians..." "And it's quiet, real quiet." " The politicians, like, really..." " Forget about it, man." " We swapped the villa for a castle." " Good, I already had enough..." "Bye." "Honza, wake up!" "Come on, get over here!" "What a dork, man." "You acted tougher last night!" "I wouldn't mind that at all." " Hey, girls!" " Hi!" "Wanna cool off too?" "That's okay, but I'll pump it for you if you want." "I think this is gonna be a pretty hot summer." "Tight, dude!" " Do you have a girlfriend?" " Why try to sell ice to Eskimos?" "Only if you wanted to screw one." "Have you ever?" "I have to admit that I haven't, but for you I'd make an exception." "I've never been with anyone either." "I guess I'll have to look around Prague for a good teacher." "I bet you've done your homework." "I bet you could teach us both theory and practice." "You're sweet, little one, but I'm more anxious to learn." "I'm trying to gain experience, not give it away." "Do your homework, then come see me." "I'll be glad to learn something new." " Bye." " Bye." "Tomorrow at ten at the station." "Have fun." "I hope I'll be having fun too." "Later!" "Hmm, three weeks of luxury." " Wow, this place is like a lab." " There's more." "Wow..." "Nice." " Check this out." " Plasma and home theater." "Pretty hardcore!" "Nice!" " Bravo!" "Can we too?" " Sure." "But no suits in the pool, okay?" "They say material ruins the water." "Come on in!" "Get a move on!" "Come on!" "I gotta tell you, I was so close;" "I almost boned those girls." "I was this close and I just couldn't get it up." "They write books and make movies about just that." "Like in Closely Watched Trains there's this one guy who hops into bed with this chick and it's, like, psss..." "He goes limp as a noodle." "It happens all the time." "I just hope those girls aren't gonna mess the place up." "Either I'll really become an orphan, or my dad will kill me." "Oh, man, and die a virgin?" "That'd really suck." "Guys, if we act like wimps we won't lose our virginity." "But if we help each other and share experiences, then we'll succeed by the end of vacation." "My goliath feels a change coming on like an old man feels rheumatism." "Come on, guys." "Moo!" "Little bastards!" "If I find those bitches..." "We got mice." "Want a hit?" "You could use it." "I heard that girls skinny dip in the pond every night." " Really?" " Lucka said so." "Are we gonna spy some young flesh?" "Well, we ain't gonna stay here and choke our chickens." "Hey, what if I really got a problem?" "Go see a doctor and tell him goliath went on strike." "I'd rather it fell off than have some guy touch it." "Maybe the nurse will check you out." "Or Honza can look at it." "He's a plumber; he knows his pipes." "Maybe it'll react to the naked chicks at the pond." " We only need moonlight and no rain." " Does that help?" "If it rains no girls will be there." "And if there's no moonlight you won't see anything to react to." "There's a moon and no rain, but nothing to see." " Isn't it some other pond?" " No way." "Hey, they're here!" "Like nymphs in a fairy tale." "Dude, check it out: four of them." "Let's get closer." "Let's go." "Hell, I can't tell if they're even naked." "Better see an eye doctor because you're missing it." "Shut up!" "You want them to catch us?" "Come on." " Will we charge them?" " They're too far away." "Let's take their clothes." "Oh, man, old ladies!" " Let's split." "Go!" " Dudes, I got a hard on!" "Help!" "Pervert!" "Out of the water, girls!" "Quickly!" "Jirka likes grandmas!" "Hey, shouldn't I lose these?" " What a gas that would be." " From that huge ass?" "No, I mean if my mom found those monster undies in the laundry." "Grounds for divorce, gentlemen." "Why would they get divorced over bloomers?" "Hey, watch out." "Well, why?" "I'm not going to say I'm dating some fat ass." "I'd just blame my dad and that'd be it." " That's that." " Let's split." "There was never unemployment like this before you were in office." "Stop pissing me off!" "You two have nothing to complain about." " Hey, the waiter's getting drunk." " Jindra, you were a shitty mayor." "And, Blazek, you're a shitty mayor too..." " Evening." " Hi!" "My name is Honza." "Sorry to interrupt." "Aha, our young man!" "He's roots for the Right too." "I overheard you talking and I got an idea." "I think only tourism can bring money to this village." "What would tourists do here?" "Hunt mushrooms behind the cowshed?" "They can visit Michael Jackson's summer house." "That's a great idea." " He's got a house here?" " Come on, Jindra!" "Tiny Tim doesn't even have a house here, let alone Michael Jackson." "So sell him one." "He's planning on buying a house here?" " Just give him one." " Of course!" "This village needs a famous name." "Sorry to bother you, but could you tell me how to get to Prague?" " Aren't you Libor Bouchek, that DJ from Evropa 2?" " That's me." " Mr. Boochek..." " It's Bouchek." " I never heard of you anyway." " Like to have a summer house here?" " Where?" "Here, in our village!" "Fifty-fifty with Michael Jackson." "It's for free." " Michael Jackson's got a house here?" " Not yet, but he will." "Right, mayor?" "Since you won't help me, I'll just go past Dolly Buster's cottage, then by Prince Charles' castle, and on to Jaromir Jagr's farm." "Thanks a lot, really." "Hey, look!" "Are we here to get some grub or to goof around?" " We need to have fun, too." " Yeah, right." "Nothing here either..." "What about here?" "I'll go." "Whistle if there's trouble." "We should have scouted around during the day." "Look out!" "Dang it all!" "What's wrong, dude?" "Great!" "How am I gonna explain ripping my pants at Balaton?" "Hey, Vashek, there's probably no dogs here." "Thanks, but I've already had enough fun for one day." "Go ahead." "Since your pants are already ripped, I thought you could..." "Ah, hell..." "Leave it to me." " You'll wake the whole village." " But where is he?" "He wimped out." "Strawberries anyone?" "Lemme see." " Man, they're frozen." " People are so ungrateful." "How about some strudel?" "We've been invited." "But be careful." "Start climbing!" "Watch out, there's a rake here someplace." "Couldn't you have leaned it up against a tree, you dork?" "Don't worry, it's only Rex." "Where've you been?" "We thought you got lost." "Come on in." "Stay!" "Stay!" "Stay!" "It's our turn." " Is this your trailer?" " It was my grandpa's." "I loved coming here when I was a kid." "He was in the circus, but after he got old he just parked it here in the yard and lived in it." "My dad always tried to get him to live in the house but he refused." "Think I could have another piece?" " Me too?" " Thanks." "Well, well, well..." "Eating at night isn't healthy." "Cut it out, bro, we just invited them for strudel." "Want some?" "Of course, the resemblance..." "I saw it immediately, but aren't you a bit old to be their brother?" "Can the young men find their own way out?" " Why be such a jerk?" " Shut up, or do you want me to tell dad?" "We're going swimming tomorrow." "Wanna come?" "Sure, but only if brother Dushin comes along." "He can't." "He's gotta keep turning that tractor wheel!" "Just wait till you get home!" "And you gentlemen should soak your feet in the tub." "Just forget about the pond because it's pretty deep, and accidents do happen." "Yep, especially whenever you drive your tractor." "Ten o'clock at the pond, okay?" " Do you always do that nonsense?" " I'm staying in shape." "What're you shaving anyway?" "Your beard?" "Better draw it on first." "I may not have much of a beard but chicks hate prickly kisses." "Really?" "Everywhere?" "Hey, did you notice?" "Zuzana really dug me." " You mean fatty?" " No, Petra was the fatty." " Klara's the one with big eyes." " I liked Lenka the best." "She was really nice." "And she's got the biggest tits." " No way, Big Eyes' tits are bigger." " Klara?" "Yeah, Lenka's got mosquito bites compared to her." " Let's measure them." " Like, how?" "How?" "With a stopwatch!" "With a tape measure, of course." "I don't think Jirka would make much of a lover." "He seems like the kind who's only interested in food." "This bikini is just impossible." "Wanna borrow mine?" "It's too small for me anyway..." "I suppose I don't even have to go swimming with you, do I?" "Three of them, three of you..." "I'd just be a seventh wheel." "Come on, Petra, it looks great on you." " You think?" " Sure." "I like Honza the best." "He's always laughing and at least he'd be fun." " I bet he's got a teeny peeny." " How can you tell?" "There's lots of ways:" "a big nose, big feet..." "But there's a sure test: a guy stretches his middle finger as far down to his wrist as possible." "Then he marks the spot with another finger." "Then he measures from the mark to the tip of his middle finger." "The length is exactly the same as his..." "If I were a guy I'd have a dick this long!" "If that idiot Dushin hadn't come in we might have had some fun last night." "Things were going pretty well." "A loaf of bread..." "Three cans of paté..." "Make it four cans." "What about some muffins?" "We'll take three muffins, those vanilla ones..." " What else?" " Traps." " Yeah, we need mouse traps." " How many?" " I don't know..." "Three." "Did you hear?" "A pervert tried to rape my mother down at the pond!" "Come on!" "Around here?" "He jumped out of the bushes with it in his hand and said..." "I won't repeat it in front of these boys." "Anything else?" "The tape measure and the wine are very important." "Did he do anything to her?" "No, he was just one of those creeps who opens his coat..." "An exhumator." "But mom said she'd certainly recognize him." "Anything else?" "A cloth measuring tape, some pretzels, and three bottles of wine..." "I mean six." " Do you have reserve wine?" " Reserve?" "Come on in the water, girls!" " It's not the same without you." " Pass me that zine." " Find some gossip." " Hey, there's a test in here." " Come on in the water..." " I got the ball!" " Careful you don't drown!" " Hey, cut it out." "He looks kind of like him." "Within the hour, I'll be getting down with one of those babes." " I mean, she'll be going down on me." " Do you gotta always act so big?" "Don't fight, dudes." "They're all hot." " Let's go!" " Let's go for it!" "Come on out..." " Is it cold?" " I hope you aren't cold." "Sit by us." "What's wrong?" "You're kinda quiet." "You guys were full of energy last night..." "We just want to repay you for your hospitality." "Tonight we'll have dinner at our place, okay?" " Sure, why not?" " Great!" " Anyone want to go in the water?" " Sure." "Hey, where's Honza?" "Honza!" " Come on, Honza, cut it out!" " Honza, this is ridiculous!" "God, there he is!" "I need mouth-to-mouth, but not from you dorks..." " Help!" "Help!" " Someone save him!" "Out of the way!" " That's enough!" " I've saved your kind before..." "Man, she could have pumped up a tractor tire!" "Real funny!" "If I get herpes I'm history!" "Gentlemen, real Provencal goulash." "There you go, Messieurs..." " Bon appétit!" " Dig in, guys." "I guess we better clean up a bit." "Get the dinner ready." "I'm on vacation." "I can clean up at home." "I don't want the girls to think we only want to get them in bed." "You're right, I should make my bed." "Every girl wants her first time to be nice, to smell nice..." "Okay, I'll spray my bed with perfume, too." "Beer and goulash..." "Enjoy!" " Trying to be funny, Jarda?" " How?" "You gave me a kiddy portion." "Their plates were so full you almost slipped a disc." "And I get this." " Got a bee in your bonnet?" " What?" "Even though they're only Praguers, those boys are with us: the Right." "But you're so Left you're left-handed." "Know why?" "Because you're the local leftist." "You only think of yourself." "Better eat before it gets cold." "And stop bugging me." "Lemme see..." "Standard weight." "Hey, you can have this dumpling if you want." "Even two!" "Anyone from around here smacked you one yet?" "Sorry..." "Bon appétit, guys!" "Well, Jarda, was it worth pissing me off?" "He's a bit nervous, and I really love yanking his chain." "I yanked it so hard once that he set his dump of a house on fire." " How did you get to him?" " I don't remember." " Cheers, guys!" " Cheers!" " Vashek!" " What?" " Catch!" " What should I do with it?" " Wash it." "There's a washtub by the shed;" "get to work!" " What's Honza doing?" " Tell him not to worry about me." "Look what I found." "Maybe it'll come in handy." "Sure, but do you have to walk across my wet floor in those scummy shoes?" "Sorry..." " Virginity Farm?" " Conquered!" " What a fire we're gonna have!" " Just as long as you cook good." "Better than momma makes." "Looks pretty good, Honza." " Just don't burn it, man." " I got it under control." " I see." "Okay, the house is clean, the girls are coming..." " What if they still won't loosen up?" " Well, we got six bottles of wine." "Right, they'll be open to anything after they're buzzing." "Yeah, but a bottle of rotgut wouldn't hurt." "Some hard alcohol..." "We gotta remember that there are four girls." "I don't want them all to act shy because one girl is left out." "Hey, that's a pretty important psychological observation." " What do we do?" " Easy:" "pay attention to all of them equally so no one will feel bad." "If we put ourselves in their place we'll know which tactics to use." " Hey, dudes, we need protection." " A bodyguard?" "You mean Dushin?" "No, you ass, rubbers!" "In this one movie I saw, some dork practiced putting rubbers on a roll." "Rolls..." "Rolls for hors d'oeuvres!" "We're making a list of crap, but we forgot we invited the girls for dinner." "Hey, do you think that old lady from the pond would recognize me?" "Come on, in the dark all cocks are gray." "Want some?" " Hello." " What'll it be, boys?" "We forgot some stuff..." "We need some fancy candles." "I only have these." " That's okay; better than nothing." " Okay, we'll take ten." " I've only got seven." " Doesn't matter." "We'll just shorten foreplay." "Get 10 packs: you never know how many we'll need." "Man, you ask her." "Honza loves chatting." "Get some of those." " Anything else?" " Yeah... that black pot." " That one?" " Don't even bother wrapping it." "What are you doing?" "Those candles are really beautiful." "They're pretty, real pretty..." "Oh..." "It looked bigger when it was up there." "Sorry." " So you don't want it?" " No." " I guess I'll put it back." " Well, what can we do?" " Pretty wild." "So think up something better, man!" "Honza has thought, but mainly Honza has found." "Gentlemen, we'll ride into town like kings." "Check this out!" "You gotta be kidding..." " You think kings rode in these?" " You know it, man." "Gimme that." "Let's go, guys." "Hold on tight because we're headed down hill." "Look out!" "Germans ahead!" "Fire!" "Oh, man!" "I'm hit." " They got Vashek." "Bastards!" " We'll pay them back!" " Look out!" "A turn." " Go!" " After him!" "Step on it, dude!" "Losers!" "Shit!" "That's gonna cost you, you assholes!" "Fuck!" "There'll be trouble if Dushin sees you getting ready for a date." "Yeah, he acts like my boyfriend, always hassling me and acting all protective." " God, he must like you." " That's just great." "Every time something big happens, I always break out in hives." "Better than getting something else." " Like what?" " Like... a cold sore." " Hey, what about these?" " They're pretty cute." "Still, I think those guys are really young." " Yeah, they're kids for sure." " We barely know them..." " But we do know they're young." " Yeah, but I like that Honza..." "Well, how do I look?" " It looks pretty good, guys." " Yeah, it does." " Anyone want some rubbers?" " Sure." " What if they don't come?" " They'll come." "I bet they're dressing up right now." "Gimme that!" "I wanna smell pretty too." " Get your own smell, dude." " I should have eaten beans." "Let's make a fire." "Yeah, if it's hot in here they'll take off their clothes." "These are looking a little tired." "We can fix them with oil." "Or just turn off the light and no one will know." " I'm taking them into the hall." " Why?" "They're still edible." "Decide who should come:" "me, or Klara the cow." "Forget it!" "You're always so insulting." "I'd rather just go home." "That was my idea!" "Don't always steal my ideas." "The both of you can go to hell." "If you can't decide, then Zuzana and I will go alone." "Right: both of you come, or neither." "Screw it." "You'll wreck your ride." " Cheers." " Cheers." "I'm still gonna waste those Prague scum." "I hear it ain't even 4 kilometers from here to the junction!" "Quiet, or he'll lose it again and trash the place." " They're coming!" " Light the stove!" " Serve the grub!" "You think we made these for you, you whores!" " What a welcome speech!" " Look, the mice were stuffing themselves." "Just pitch the eaten ones and blow off the turds." "Hey, guys, are you there?" "Moo!" " Anyone like some wine?" " Sure." "The incense smells good, huh?" " Help yourself." " Thanks." " You made them?" " Yeah." "They're hors d'oeuvres." " Oh, really?" " Lucka, want my olive?" "Want some bread, Petra?" " How do you like it here?" " It's nice..." " The food is good." " We made it." " All by yourselves?" " Yeah, I did." " The pickles are nicely sliced." " Honza cut them." " Really?" "Should I add more wood to the fire?" "No, it's fine in here." "Go ahead." "Well, what do you wanna do?" "Jirka?" " Do you pass?" " You pass?" "Then strip!" " What about the T-shirt?" " Yeah, yeah..." "Bravo!" " Not much left!" " Look at yourself, man!" "Come on, let's go!" "Honza, try to do this:" "Bend your middle finger..." " Bend it down." " As far as you can..." " Like this?" "Why?" " Now straighten it out." "You gotta be kidding!" "You're like my nine-year-old brother." "Man, you're really..." "Hey, Jirka, you try it." "Stretch you finger down your palm." "Now straighten it out." "Anyone got a ruler?" " A short one?" " No, a normal one..." " You do?" " Sure, it's yellow with black numbers." " That hurts!" " Do it again." " Straighten it out." " How much?" " 71/4 inches!" " Come on, let's play!" " Let's go, let's go!" "71/4 inches!" "Let's play." "No stalling!" " Hey, man!" " Tight!" "Here's to us, guys!" "You mean the girls." "Get a move on!" "Let's go!" "Take two." "Do I have to?" " Yes!" " Rules are rules." " What?" "Guys, could we have some privacy?" "I have something important to tell Lenka." "Please..." "Please." " Fine by me." " What's going on?" "If it were me, I'd just strip because all of us are curious about Jirka's whopper." "And if you don't strip none of us will get to see it." "Maybe it'll be just one game." "If he loses he'll have to strip." "But if you won't drop your panties, which is like being naked anyway, then none of us will see it, and it's over." "It's easy to talk when it isn't you." "If it was me, I'd just strip and not make such a fuss." " Besides, we all knew the risks." " Yeah, you shouldn't have played." "I'd be glad to strip, but not first." "Girls always act weird when the going gets tough." "We played this once in our basement." "There was this one girl that was supposed to strip." "She said she'd do it, but that we, the boys, first had to kiss every step in the building." " Come on!" " And did you?" " Just four floors." "You can't compromise about some things." "A bet's a bet, and losing is losing." " So did she strip?" " Yeah." " How old was she?" "We were all the same age..." "It was in nursery school." "Guys!" "Lenka wants to make a proposal." "I'm happy to strip..." "But you have to consider that there are seven of us." " Seven is a lucky number!" " Four girls and three guys." "If Jirka shows himself, I'll strip too and we can continue." " Okay, he'll strip." " That's a great idea." "Wait, I didn't lose." " So what?" " What so what?" " Hold on a minute... 71/4 inches..." "Jirka wants to make a proposal." "I think we can do this fairly:" "We'll all strip and it's done." "We'll turn around now and count to ten, and when we turn back around we'll all be naked." "That sounds okay, fine." "Five... six... seven... eight... nine... ten..." " See ya, we're going home." " Bye." " Bye." " Bye." " Bye..." "It was nice." " Dude, they left!" " Oh, man!" " Man, how?" " What the?" "Oh, hell..." "I see you had quite a party." "But it ended kinda early, eh, jerks?" "How about some hors d'oeuvres?" " Go get some!" " That's more like it." "My pal and I here planned on smashing your stupid faces." "But for such kind hospitality, we can skip the bloody noses for today." "Okay, gentlemen..." "This is your last warning:" "Stop screwing around with the local girls." "And if we meet again on the road I'll grind you into the dirt." "You heard Dushin, you assholes." "Better watch yourselves." "One setback can't discourage us, or that dork Dushin either." "Come on, let's go." "Let's go." "Dudes, it's Dushin..." " Hi, Dushin!" " Hey there!" "What the hell's he doing?" "Nice!" "I heard it's impossible to get a girl off if she rides a horse." "Really!" "Well, for most guys." "Hi guys." " Hi." " Hi." "What a total ass!" "It takes training to strengthen the pinky edge." " That was pretty cool." " No big deal." "If you're strong... as a karate master you can split ten bricks at once." "The only thing you'll ever split is fresh shit." "Great, and how do I explain that I broke my hand at Balaton?" " Man, it hurts like a bitch!" " Hi, guys." "I gotta tell you, we're having the best vacation ever." "Swimming every day, Jacuzzi, everything cool..." "How about you?" "Great: we're constantly stoking the stove, hunting mice, and Vashek just broke his hand." " Dang it!" " Something's always happening." "I'm singing tonight at the pub and we wanted to invite you." "Lemme see..." "I guess it's kind of dangerous for you around here." "I hope you didn't try to ride one of our fillies." "They're a little more spirited than a Prague merry-go-round." "What are my underwear doing here?" " Dushin!" " What?" " Come here!" "What's the meaning of this?" "That's my underwear!" "You ought to be ashamed, you pig!" "You're the peeping Tom, you louse!" " This is unheard of!" " Can't you find a girlfriend?" "Do you need to spy on old ladies?" "Look at him!" "Beat it before I smack your face!" " That was a brilliant move, dudes." " My compliments, sir!" " He got his." " Moo!" "Like I said, man, that Lenka is one hot girl." " We have pretty girls here, huh?" " Yeah!" "But the best woman is flat..." "on her back." "Which reminds me:" "the old lady is waiting for me." "Have a great time." "Goodnight." " Which of you is Ho-Honza?" " I'm Ho-Honza..." "Someone's w-waiting for you at the b-bus stop." "What's that about?" " Hi, Honza." " Hi." "Hey..." "I didn't want to mess up the dinner." " But the other girls are silly." " Come on, it doesn't matter." "Let's go to my place;" "someone might see us." "Sure." "Know where Lenka is?" "I guess I'll go." "Push..." "More..." "Come on!" "Hold it a sec." "81/4." "That's why it hurt..." "at the beginning." " Do you love me?" " A lot." "Wasn't it kind of quick, Honza?" "I like to have everything quickly behind me so that I can do more things." "Just be sure not to tell anyone, especially the guys." "Dushin, I sense trouble..." "It'll be okay." " Leaving already?" " Only after we hit the pond." "Where were you so long?" "Have you seen Lenka?" "She was pissed at you for ignoring her." "She's mad because you think her ass is too small." "Didn't someone mention that you set your house on fire?" "Idiot!" " Well, girls, shall we?" " Did you see that, girls?" "Let's go!" " Hi, Lenka." " Hi." " You can't sleep either?" " No." " Does it hurt?" " I can take it." " But it's a drag on vacation." " Broken bones suck." "My grandpa gave me some pain relief drops." "Want to try them?" "Lenka!" "If you're here, get out immediately!" " Don't piss me off!" " Quit peeping at us, Tommy!" "Come on, Dushin!" "Lenka's really not here!" "I'm not stupid!" "I know you're covering for her." "Sorry, I feel crippled with this hand..." "Don't be sad, you did great for being wounded." "Come back next year and it'll measure longer." " Can I ask you something?" " Sure." " Just if I was better than a horse." " What?" "I heard that girls who ride horses..." "Hey, you were better than a horse." " Bye." " Bye." "35... 35..." " Can't sleep either?" " Not really." "Hey, look at those mosquito bites..." "I mean on your arm." " You wanna measure how big I am?" " Well, I..." "All the guys I've had measure my breasts." "Really?" "But you can't tell anyone, not even the guys." "35." "We're coming to help, Jirka!" "Beer?" "Thirst is great... and eternal." "Let's go!" "Come on, Honza!" "We're men!" "Assholes!" "Shit!" "Losers!" "Let's go!" "Step on it!" " Hey guys, what are we?" " Kings!" " And what else?" " Brothers-in-law!" " And what else?" " Goliaths!" "Fantastic!" " Look out for the curve!" " Don't worry." ""Is He Coming This Year?"" "And It's the Beginning of the End" "Subtitled by John Brent"