"fuck!" "Roy!" "asshole." "mi amigo!" "I bring you your cars." "no?" " No!" "Are you using water-based paint?" "we don't get much rain around here." "What do you want for 200?" "Metalflake?" "you don't like these cars..." "here's my inventory." " That's a picture of 250 cars." " 253 cars." "The river has been very good to me this year..." "I can't make a deal off a picture like this." "How about some girls?" "I got all kinds!" "big tits..." "I think I got a customer." "I'll think of something." "Student driver shit!" "Rudy!" " Quiet!" "you're not gonna..." " I'm gonna bait this guy." " Luke's not gonna like that." " Luke's asleep." "see him?" "He pulled up in that red Chevelle." "I'm gonna sell him my Buick." "you got your foot." "A rabbit's foot is no protection against a red car." "A red car is bad luck and trouble." "I gotta get some customers on this lot." "I gotta have some fast cash." "Yeah?" "For what?" "For this." "now this... doesn't lie." "This man gives you a special guarantee." "it's your decision." "One who hesitates is lost." "pal?" "Come on back here!" "Hi there!" "How you doing?" "This your ten dollars?" "I saw it floating' underneath the car." " Here you are." "What's your name?" " Stanley Dewoski." "What a coincidence!" "Rudy Polanski." " I like that watch... great shoes!" " Thanks." "huh?" "You got good taste." "Nice to see somebody on this lot who knows a good car when he sees one." "I was just looking." "do anything you want." "Nobody's gonna pressure anybody around here." "I really think you ought to buy this Buick." "You ought to buy it right now." "This Buick is you." "This is your car!" "Stanley Dewoski is Buick centurion convertible." "can I afford to buy a car like this?" "You can't afford not to buy a car like this." "000 dollars ahead." "The prestige of owning a Buick centurion can't be measured in dollars and cents." "Sam?" "I've been trying to make sure that new freeway ramp ran through my brother's lot." "the Goddamn ramp is coming right through the middle of my lot." "What's with that pinhead mayor?" "He had no choice." "It was the only way to prove there was no conflict of interest." "That mayor don't know dick!" "You're the assistant deputy district attorney!" "Can't you fix it for me?" "huh?" "This country's going to the dogs!" "that son of a bitch stayed bought." "Stan!" "Trust me!" "Luke." "That's a nice pair of shoes." "didn't you?" "Skated him from across the street." "I had to." "I can't sell a car unless I get them on the lot." "will ya?" "son?" "Suppose that he's an undercover agent for the consumer protection agency." "We're still on probation for consumer fraud." "We gotta watch our step." "My ravenous brother over there is just waiting to get his grimy hands on this lot." "I gotta move some cars." "I gotta make ten grand in six weeks." "Ten grand?" "Are you in some kind of trouble?" "no... take a look at this." "There's an opening for state senate." "somebody with no axes to grind... who wants to tell the people what they want to hear." "They're looking for me!" "I talked to the party chairman last week." "Sixty grand buys me the nomination." "huh?" "That's all it takes nowadays?" "that's like a down payment." "Luke!" "meet people... maybe even meet some broad..." "Rudy?" "I don't want to be stuck on this dusty lot for the rest of my life." "have people look up at me for a change." "This is my once in a lifetime deal." "I took out a second mortgage on my mobile home." "sold my car and I'm still ten grand short." "get me a phillip's screwdriver." "I got some promotional ideas that'll flood this place with prospects." "I found two electronics whizz-kids." "They know how to jam a football game and sneak in some commercials." "big tits..." "I think we'll put this baby on the line..." "I can't fool with this forever." "Sixteen months is long enough." "I said a phillip's screwdriver." "can I ask you something?" "Why are we giving these cars away?" "We're not giving them away." "School district's paying me 1200 apiece." "I can get 3950 apiece for these cars." "Those are the 1200 apiece cars." "What?" "These?" "most irresponsible operator I ever met." "And when you stand there and tell me that you want to be a politician..." "I'll lend you the ten grand." "Luke?" "I wouldn't kid you about something like that." "We'll go down to the bank in the morning." "Only I don't want to jam any football games and I don't want any strippers." "Luke!" "I love ya!" "I'm on my way!" "ask what you've just done for your country!" "Luke?" "I'm just not used to all that kind of excitement." "take a pill." "I'll be all right." "You just promise me one thing." "become a big-shot politician... promise me you'll keep my brother from getting his hands on this lot." "Sam?" "They know they're about to have the best freeway access in the state." "Roy." "It won't be announced for a few weeks yet." "I suggest you torch this museum and buy out your brother with the insurance money." "do you think I would try to have him put away?" "The only way I'm going to get that lot is to inherit it." " I thought he had a daughter." " She ain't been heard of in years." "you know." "Roy." "just dreaming." " Right... carmine!" "Send in that new kid from the demolition derby." "mickey." "shall we?" "Look at that undercoating... pal." " Thanks." "Shall we examine the capacious interior of this luxury automobile?" "I got this guy right where I want him." "Stay out of this... good to see you." "I got the papers drawn up on that Chrysler..." "I'll be right with you." "Clown." "you a salesman?" "Now that's a miracle." "that's a miracle." "you a salesman here?" "Mary and Joseph that is a miracle!" "That was my daughter calling me." "Do you believe it?" "My own daughter." "I just want to buy a car." "joined one of those communes." "I ain't seen or heard from her." "Didn't know if she was living or dead." "after ten years." "Now that's a miracle." "old man." "ran away." "Only she got hit by a truck." "you gotta be jacking me." "you're looking at one of the finest automobiles on this lot." "I rebuilt that engine with my own two hands." "Does it run?" "Does it run?" "Like a dream." "for 2400 it'd better run like a wet dream." "Yeah... that's a miracle." "old man." "After ten years..." " you won't need that." " I like to feel safe." "easy." "old man!" "What the hell was that?" "it's running real hot... real hot." "old man?" "old man?" "You ever played chicken?" "I love chicken..." "I love it." "old man." "I like you." "What do you say we find out what this baby is constructed of?" "old man." "Oh shit!" "old man?" "You homesick?" "I'll have you home in a minute." "What the hell was that?" "I'm gonna have to think about it." "I got your card." " I broke my back getting you this deal." " Fifty bucks never killed anybody." "You're not going to find another deal like this in town." " Fifty bucks never killed anybody." " A deal's a deal." "you win." "my boss sees these figures... he's going to have a stroke." "What's he trying to pull?" "Fifty bucks never killed anybody." "it's a deal!" "I'll sign!" "I'll sign!" "I'm sorry!" "I shook on it!" "It's a deal!" "I never welsh on a deal and I really do want the car... where are your pills?" "you guys mean business!" "I signed it!" "Show it to him!" "show it to him." "take it!" "Look... you guys are busy." "We'll pick the car up tomorrow." "let's get out of here!" "Jesus Christ!" "we're being watched." " By who?" " Who do you think?" "I know it's late." "I want you to come over here and visit my brother with me." "I'm a little concerned about his health." "And bring those probate papers with you." "Probate papers!" "He's gone." "I don't want Toby to see him like this." "man." "I think we're out of our minds here." "for Christ's sake!" "You know that and I know." "But the cops are going to say it was a heart attack." "no nothing." "That means his brother inherits this lot." "I promised him I wasn't going to let that son of a bitch get his hands on this lot." "don't worry about it!" "I ought to know how to take it down!" "let it down easy." "this shit gives me the creeps." "He should be buried properly." "Nobody's gonna believe he drove his Edsel to Miami." "Nobody goes to Miami!" "Old people go to Miami!" "Where do you want him to go?" "Aspen?" " This crate won't go around the block!" " This motherfucker runs!" "Please show a little respect for the dead!" " You want to say something?" " Me?" "No." " Jim?" " About what?" "All right... you're about to drive over the curb for the last time." "a trusted man." "We can't carve your name on a granite tombstone... but we can keep it flying high above this lot." "We can't put flowers on your grave... but we can hang the finest vinyl pennants and pinwheels that money can buy." "You'll be surrounded by an inventory of the finest quality discount cars." "general motors will be your headstone." "high visibility will be your epitaph." "Luke." "Keep shovelling." "Aren't you a little big to be playing in the fucking mud?" " We're landscaping." " We had some flooding last night." "what can I do you for?" " I'd like to talk to my brother." " You're gonna have to talk kind of loud." "Miami." "Miami beach." " Florida." " I know where the fuck Miami beach is." "Some asshole fucked up one of his cars... so he decided he needed a little R and R. He's got a bad heart." " I know all about his Goddamn heart." " I'm sure you do." " What airline did he fly?" " Edsel." "but that thing runs like new." "Russo!" "He had a stroke." "I saw him hit the floor." "believe me." "Sam." "The son of a bitch is lying!" "Jim." "Luke told me to have you arrested for trespassing." "Do I have to call the cops?" " Do we have to call the cops?" " Are you a fucking parrot?" "let's go." " Suck-ass son of a bitch." "Get the hell out of here!" "we got nothing to worry about." " Are you out of your fucking mind?" "We've got a dead guy buried here and we're going on TV illegally tonight." "We need customers." "Sneaking a commercial into a football game is illegal!" "Freddie and Eddie know what they're doing." "What if the FCC wants to bust us for false advertising?" "We just work here." "They'll have to talk to the boss." "Freddie." "All right... and out." "come here." "Are we gonna be able to film under these blue lights?" "We're not going to film under the blue lights." "will ya?" " Rehearsal!" " We just sell this purple olds." "this is where you show us how you're gonna sit." "A little thigh to keep their attention... why don't you tell us about this one?" "radio and heater." "For only $695." "my ass." "This motherfucker is red... and be sure to check out those high beams." "I make a little tit joke." "I'm sorry this is so sexist... purple..." " did you remember the sunglasses?" " I got something better." "It's perfect... idiot!" "You trying to murder me?" "Trying to assault my person?" "This is perfect." "They're disguises." "I only have three left." "Here we go." "Do me a favour and just put 'em on." "come on!" "I'm not doing a commercial wearing these." "you'll look great." " We'll look like assholes!" "put 'em on." "I'm serious." " No!" " Stand by!" "Freddie." " He's got it at the forty." "forget it!" " He's past the midfield stripe!" " No way!" "He's on the thirty!" " Put 'em on!" " It's out of the question." " He's on the twenty." " No!" "no!" " And Eddie..." " What?" "Freddie." "it's a red car." "That's a stupid place for a commercial." "I don't believe it!" "Did you see that?" "shall we?" "Rudy?" " What did he say?" "You know he just said "fuck"?" "That's an FCC violation." "A red chariot to take my ass straight to hell!" "Margaret!" "Get out there!" "Holy Jesus!" "She's caught on the hood ornament." "Stupid bitch!" "I hate women!" "look!" "It's a red car!" "these people are obviously hysterical... over the fabulous deals we have here at new deal used cars." "We've got over ten jillion cars down here." "Every one a best deal like that." " Let's take a look under the hood." " What?" "!" "bare tits!" " That's disgusting!" "I don't want my children to see that!" "All those years at film school paid off." "Holy Jesus palomino!" "Seduce the camera... come on down to new deal used cars... come on down and leave it to us." "Front page advertising and it's free." "Can you believe it?" "it's time." " I never sold no damn cars before." "Just get 'em in that car." "Nothing sells a car better than the car itself." "Jeff?" "Jim?" "Toby?" "You ready?" "guys... let's go!" "Morning!" "Mr and Mrs...?" " O'hara." "how are ya?" "I've got this '74... señor." "I'll be right back." "Mr and Mrs...?" " Jackson." "Rudy Washington carver." "You checking out this Cadillac... the interior matches the colour of your eyes." "do you realise... that your hair matches the colour of these tyres?" "I'm just looking." "I don't want to get inside." "a lot of leg room." " I've just been looking around." "These aren't the cars I bought." "These are the cars your students will be able to afford." "They should be learning to drive in these cars." " But the school board..." " They'll thank you." "I'm the kind of guy that believes that a man with your insight... don't you agree?" "Do you have a car in mind for me?" " I want you to look inside." " I don't want to look inside!" "Just get in the motherfucking car!" "Get in there!" "Boys!" "Out of the car!" "Now!" "I got three dogs of my own." "Then you understand when I say that not only do I think this is the car for you..." "Toby?" "isn't that cute?" "the least we can do is take the car for a test drive." "Toby?" "Al?" " All right." "kids!" "test drive with Toby... that's right... this baby's got a big engine... big v8." "I want you to feel that pickup." "So just go right ahead and punch it." "Punch it?" "Stop!" "Oh my god!" "mister." "You killed my dog!" "I'm sorry... all he wanted was for you to be happy in this car... and now he's dead." "How was I supposed to know...?" " We raised it from a puppy..." " How could you?" "I know I can't bring your dog back... but... how about if I buy the car?" "Nail 'em for false advertising." "They said they had 10 million cars." "They said they had ten jillion cars." "I've got to prosecute the owner." "He's off on a fishing expedition in Florida." "my ass!" "He's sitting at the bottom of a lake someplace." "You've got no proof." "goddammit!" "I'll do it by myself." "By using the greatest tool this country ever developed:" "Free enterprise." "The American way!" "this circus idea... feed the helium and drive out a car." "join the circus!" "Look at them over there." "Not a customer on the lot." "That commercial was a fluke." "They're practically out of business." "homespun entertainment." "That's what Roy L. Fuchs stands for too." "I just hope that Goddamn camel don't shit all over the lot." "Folks!" "Here at new deal used cars we are stripping away inflation!" "We're taking off those high prices!" "so come on over... and check out the front ends of these beauties and inspect the rear ends too!" "Scum... all you have to do is sign your name right here... over there we have a group of immoral charlatans." "cut it!" "What?" " You can't say that on TV." " I can say any Goddamn thing I want." "they can sue you." "Only the owner could sue me and he has to be alive." "Now get out of here." "it's old Lorette here." "I was out buying some peroxide today- and there was this clerk who looks just like you and it got me thinking... this is Nadine." "I bought this new Barry Manilow record today... if you throw out my number again... we're in big trouble." "A menace that should be brought to the attention of every decent citizen." "Behind me is the automobile business at its absolute worst." "masquerading as businessmen." "vile and disgusting ploys... hard-working citizen." "They are the lowest form of scum on the face of the earth... son of a bitch!" "pre-owned automobiles." "pal!" "Jam the presidential address?" "but you're out of your friggin' mind." "You've gone right over the edge... we'll be on all three networks at the same time." " How's that even done?" " Freddie?" "little ovens... it's simple." "You take the microwaves and you bounce 'em off a Comsat." "A communication satellite." "We bounce the microwave off the comsat to Eddie... on the roof of the phone company in Washington DC." "We intercept carter's transmission and jam it with our own." " Is this a great idea?" " When is this presidential address?" "nine o'clock." "before the audience gets too bored." "I don't know." ""trouble brewing on the horizon." "we're fucking with the president of the united states!" "doesn't he?" "You've seen how shitty business is today." "we had nuns protesting outside when I got here." " Jim had to turn the fire hose on them." " I knocked them right on their ass too!" "I'm still five grand short." "We've got to fight fire with fire." "You'll be fighting fire with enhanced radiation weaponry." "right?" "Are we sure we can pull this off?" "If I can build and install a pacemaker in this man's chest..." "I can damn well bounce a microwave off a satellite!" "look at this thing!" "Look at this... only twelve ninety-five." "Don't you have some equipment to hook up?" "Oh shit!" "Radio shack closes in half an hour." "Let's go!" " How do you change the batteries?" " It's rechargeable." "it's still light outside." "See you tomorrow night." " Remember:" "We cut in at exactly 9.03." " Post meridian." " What?" " Never mind." "9.03." " What are you guys doing?" " Will you get down!" " What?" " Do you see that woman out there?" "She's trouble." "She pulled up in that red Toyota." "I'm not kidding!" "I think she's from the consumer protection agency." "You see the way she's looking at that blue Chevy?" "She knows it's a taxi." "You're paranoid." "where's the owner?" "Girls who look that great don't work for the consumer protection agency." "Just don't let the little head do the thinking for the big head." " Trust me." " I do." "Congratulations!" "This is our giveaway week." "you win." "but I can see there's only one of you." "So I'll throw myself in with the deal." "How does that sound?" "can you tell me where I might find the owner?" "Well... yeah..." "I was just trying to... let me tell you about this car." "I can give you an unbelievably low price." "I would certainly hope so." "Look at the finish." "I see primer." "Where?" "I see it here..." "Rudy!" "She's from the consumer protection agency." "but I'm not now." " Better business bureau?" "Nader's raiders?" " Trust me." "about dinner... is Luke in his office?" " No." "What do you feel like eating?" "he's out of town..." " he's out of town?" "On business?" " Pleasure." "He's in Miami beach." " Miami?" " Miami beach." "I've been to Miami beach." "It's not that bad." "I was supposed to meet my father here." "what kind of car does he drive?" "He used to have a green and white Edsel." "Who do you think this is?" "That's her." "No resemblance." "I've been selling cars long enough to know when somebody's telling the truth." "That is Luke's daughter." "Do we have any health food restaurants in this town?" "we've got to get rid of her." "What if she figures out what's going on?" "What if she sees our commercial?" "Why not just throw her in the hole with her old man?" "I'll get her drunk." "I'll tell her the reason that Luke went to Florida was... best salad bar in town:" "Airport lanes!" "stop it..." "I'm just a farmer." "That is the most disgusting joke I've ever heard." "I wanted to ask you something." " What?" "How did you know that I used to work for the consumer protection agency?" "The thing with the taxi?" "Why didn't you tell me it was yellow primer?" "so I told you a bigger bunch of bullshit." "At least you're very honest about your dishonesty and I admire that." "I really do." "about Luke..." "I got to tell you something..." " Luke left for Florida the night I called." " That's not the reason he left." "I think it would be better for me and for everybody concerned if I just leave." "I was thinking of heading up to Oregon or something like that." "Thank you very much for taking care of me." "It was very considerate." "I really had a good time." "Maybe we'll do it again sometime." "Thanks a lot." "Goodbye... thanks." "Barbara... wait a minute." "I know that sometimes I can come off as... but..." "I want you to know that I really like you." "so... come by and look me up." "I've been thinking about what you've been saying about Luke..." "I'm passing judgement on a man I haven't even seen in ten years." "I have to give him the benefit of the doubt." "So I've decided to stick around for a few days." "okay?" "Goodnight." "she's staying." "I told her Luke would call." "What else could I do?" "What the fuck is that?" "she's going to be suspicious." "We're going to have a billion people on the lot tomorrow." "trying to figure this out." "There's only one thing we can do:" "Cancel the commercial." "I've got the solution to our problem." "Courtesy of the beautiful Daphne." "What I have here... is a one-way train ticket to Miami." "You take it out there and give it to Barbara." "Tell her Luke called and wants her to come straight down." "you get her on the train at midnight." "I feel horseshit enough as it is." "for Christ's sake!" "I can't do this to her." "huh?" "Don't you like your salad?" "Where are you?" "You're certainly not here." "I was thinking how much easier everything would have been if you'd come last week." "I don't understand." "Why?" "There's something I got to tell you." "but... the truth of this whole thing is that Luke... sir?" "I believe you dropped this." "Thanks." "Wait a minute." "this is a ticket to Miami." " I was going to wait till after dessert." " You talked to Luke last night?" "no... but he's still on that fishing charter and..." " I just decided to take it on myself." " That's the most considerate thing." " But I can't go." " What?" "I just want to wait till he comes back." "I'm having a wonderful time." "You're really great company." "Perfect." "Jim's ready." "The president isn't ready and he's a bit more important." " We got to go!" " Why are you so nervous?" "I rattle when I walk!" "fine..." "Could I offer you a sleeping pill?" "if I take any more shit..." " Aha!" "There we are." " What the hell is this?" " This is a test pattern." "you're looking real good." "Carter goes on in 28 seconds." "The programme originally scheduled will not be seen in order that..." "I didn't know president carter was going to be on TV." "Do you mind turning that thing off?" "I'm trying to eat." "Have a little respect." "This happens to be the president." "food giant!" "I'm paying 20 bucks for this meal." "how would you like that TV stuck up your ass?" "it's not worth all this trouble." " I gotta get some air." " Are you all right?" " I gotta get some fresh air." " Are you going to be okay?" "Are you all right?" "just come over here and sit down for a second." "Inflation is obviously a serious problem." "What is the solution?" "You want the solution to inflation?" "where we're battling inflation not only- by fighting high prices... but by blowing the living shit out of high prices!" "You heard me right!" "Here's an example:" "1973 Cadillac coup Deville for $6299." "That price is too high." "1973... it's got a stereo... power windows... and a price that is just too high!" "friends... it's high prices!" "old high prices!" "Marshall!" "Jesus Christ... that's new deal used cars." "Now wait just a Goddamn minute!" "What the hell is this?" "Is this a 1977 Mercedes 450 SL for 24000 dollars?" "That's too fuckin' high!" "You son of a bitch!" "We blew the shit out of that overpriced motherfucker- just the way we blow the shit out of all high prices at new deal used cars." "So you all come on down!" "New deal used cars." "So you all come on down!" "Did you hear what I said?" "I have heard you with unmistakable clarity." "You son of a bitch!" " Let's go!" " Move this motherfucker!" "A free economy cannot cope with inflation." "rather than... as a collection of special interests... what kind of people do they think we are?" "You want to give me that again?" "I couldn't tell what was going on." "I saw the car over there in flames and all these strange little characters... ayatollah!" "Then they all got in a car and drove away." "I guess it was Iranian students... out to discredit the American way of life." "I can't imagine who else would do such a thing." "Let's go." "Sure hope you nail 'em." "Happy motoring." "did those FBI guys..." "were they..." "Jim?" "Combat fatigue... shit." "you son of a bitch!" "you asked for it now." "you lunatic!" "now I'm gonna have to hurt you." "Where's my brother?" "you... the pit... they filled in the pit!" "I knew it!" "Get off!" "Dumb dog!" "Get away!" "Get off!" "you dumb dog!" "Toby!" "You pissed on my..." "goddammit!" "Now aren't you glad I didn't go to Florida?" "Since you brought that up... there's something I gotta get off my chest..." "I'll get back to you." "pick up!" "Emergency!" "What is it?" "Jesus!" "Where are you now?" "I'll be right there." "What is it?" "Is it about Luke?" "what then?" "What is it about?" "What's going on?" "I gotta go down to the station house and bail him out." "I'll be right back." "See you later." "pick up!" "Emergency!" "What is it?" "Fuchs knows Luke's dead." "He found out where we buried him." " Jesus!" " He beat up Jeff!" "The cops are gonna think we killed him!" " Where are you now?" " At the lot!" "I'll be right there." "The white house reaction has been negative." "Do you think we like being associated with the president of the united states?" "We run an honest lot here!" "guys!" "We're not even open yet!" "I told you to keep your ass off this lot." "Sam." " Bring those picks over here!" " A search warrant?" "What the hell are you guys looking for?" "Start digging over here." "start digging up our lawn... at least tell us what the hell you're looking for." "You buried my brother here and you know it." "are you looking for Luke?" "He was here 30 minutes ago." "He'll be right back." "You spoke to Lucas Fuchs 30 minutes ago?" "He got back from Miami beach last night." "he smells!" "Luke." "Toby!" "I hear you!" "Luke!" "you're wasting your time." "Here he comes now!" "he is still alive." "Where the hell is he going?" " He's exceeding the speed limit." " He's got to be drunk." "He's heading right for the transformer!" "grab that pump!" "very clean... not a trace of evidence." "Shrewd... kept yourself out of jail." " Now get the fuck off my lot." " Your lot?" "You just handed it to me on a silver platter." "Roy." "Luke's got a daughter." "You remember Barbara?" "She's back in town." "I bet you haven't seen her in ten years." "You wanna talk to her?" "She's staying over at my place." "You son of a bitch." "Get off me!" "Get this maniac off me!" "here you go." "Oh my god... you son of a bitch!" "your father's dead." "Russo?" "He buried him back there in the Edsel!" " Will you please tell me the truth?" " All right... never was... he was in aspen." "He didn't want you to be here when he got back... you're fired and you can take your friends with you." "Get off my lot!" "Shit!" "So?" "What do you say?" "I'll have to think about it." "He's an asshole." "Don't think too long." "A ninth-grader was looking at it yesterday." "Real grinders." "Tougher to close than their parents." "Aw Christ... how am I gonna come up with five grand?" "huh?" "I got a good feeling about Denver." "Here's his number." "Denver's ranked tenth." "but I found a dime in a payphone booth this morning." "Ten cents... minted in Denver." "The numbers that I dialled on the phone added up to ten." "Today is the tenth... and you know what time it was when I found the dime?" "Ten after ten!" "so I bet ten bucks." "That's the dumbest fucking shit I ever heard in my life." "Superstitious crap..." "I'm gonna push you under a ladder on friday the 13th." "Why don't you just go ahead and call her?" "She knows you belong on that lot." "Just call her." "okay..." "Mr Russo?" "the party chairman." "The machine has to present its slate of candidates the day after tomorrow." "don't you?" "I got it." " Very good." "Put it out!" "Put it out!" "boss." "You're sure this is the one they're filming over there now?" "this stinks." "I wouldn't buy a car from anybody who put this kind of shit on TV." " Would you?" " I wouldn't." "That's what I keep telling you." "She don't know what the hell she's doing." "She hasn't sold a car in four days." "At this rate she'll be bankrupt in three weeks." "Roy?" "Sam." "Any progress with your niece?" "she's as stubborn as her old man." "She won't sell dick." "But I'll just bide my time." "She'll be bankrupt in two weeks." "You haven't any time to bide." "The mayor's going to announce the new freeway the day after tomorrow." "You'd better find some sucker to buy your lot." "Roy?" "Asshole mayor!" "We know anybody over at channel 7?" "Now watch this." "See the... style of cars we have to choose from." "We have... you see where she said "style"?" "See the... style of cars we have to choose from... further on down she says this:" "just one mile... west of... a mile." "I took the word mile and I put it over style." "Now watch this." "Come on down and see the mile of cars we have to choose from." "Son of a bitch!" "Let me see that again." "See the... mile of cars..." "we have to choose from..." "Sam?" "Most blatant case of false advertising." "I could have her convicted 24 hours after it's aired." " When are they going to show that?" " During tonight's game." "Why don't you come on down and see the mile of cars we have to choose from?" "She said she had a mile of cars." "Can you believe that?" "That's the most blatant claim of false advertising I ever heard." "doesn't she?" "I've been looking all over for you." "I'm about to lose my job because of you." "I've got more than 250 sophomores who aren't going to pass driver education... because your frigging cars won't run." "You got an auto-shop class." "Enroll your sophomores and teach them something." "I'll teach you something." "Rudy?" "Denver!" "I get a feeling." "Hell of a game!" "You should have put some money on it." " I did." " Great!" "On Kansas city." "Kansas city?" "How much did you put down?" "All of it." "All of it?" "Everything I own." "Forty gs?" "!" "You dope!" "You just threw it right down the tubes!" "Don't you get it?" "The only way you can win is if... if I lose." "I wouldn't worry about that." "I think your money's in the bag." "A minute to go..." "I think Denver would have to run into some pretty bad luck." "Denver would have to run into some pretty bad luck... he fumbled the ball!" "It's recovered..." "I got the ball..." "I got it." "I gotta turn this contest around." "babe." " More salt!" " Please god... just like magic..." "Danny... pass the ball... is there a black cat in the house?" "How about a ladder?" "What the hell are you trying to do?" "Duck!" "Touchdown!" "I don't believe it!" "I made it!" "Russo?" "Or should I say "senator Russo"?" "I'm a little bit nervous about... about what I'm supposed to do." "What sort of policies are you guys trying to push?" "the working man." "Here's the new freeway we're announcing." "My son-in-law got that contract." "Fine boy!" "We're also in favour of public facilities." "We're going to tear down that old hospital on the east side... and put in a nice golf course." "Chairman Caldwell really likes to play golf." "Wins every tournament he plays in." "fine golfer." "And we're in favour of lowering taxes." "Didn't you use to work there?" "Closed?" "The party's looking out for the consumer." "the proprietor made a false claim on a television commercial." "One of our constituents brought it to our attention." "The case goes before a judge in about five minutes." "Justice can be swift." "What the hell do you mean you got hanging judge Harrison?" "he's legit!" "Remember that coloured kid found guilty for stealing a case of beer?" "Hanging judge Harrison gave him 35 years of hard labour." "You need someone to throw the book at this broad." "I even have her attorney on my payroll." "Roy." "Trust me." "even if they do convict her." "She's gonna be convicted and I'm afraid the fine is going to be real severe." "Jesus... there's only one thing she can do:" "Sell that lot." "Jesus Christ!" "Russo!" "Hold it!" "Wait a minute!" "hear ye!" "The honourable H.H. Harrison presiding." "hear ye!" "The honourable H.H. Harrison presiding." "All rise!" "This court... is now in session." "so help you god?" "I do." "Excuse me... excuse me... pardon me... sorry." "Mr Slaton?" "Will you commence the questioning?" "Please state your name and occupation." "Barbara Jane Fuchs." "I'm the owner of the new deal car lot." "We have heard testimony from four qualified experts... to the fact that the commercial in question... was authorised by you and was not tampered with in any way." "miss Fuchs:" "Do you have a mile of cars to sell on your lot?" "Yes!" "Lie!" "please?" "Do you have a mile of cars for sale on your lot?" "will the cars on your lot total one mile in length... and may I remind you you are under oath?" "miss Fuchs!" "Yes." "Order!" "Order!" "Order!" "Miss Fuchs?" "Are you absolutely certain that you understood the gentleman's question?" "that one mile of cars is over 250 cars?" "Are you aware that you've opened yourself up to a charge of perjury?" "What?" "I can produce a number of witnesses who will testify to the fact that she is lying." "only 25 cars on her lot at this time." "judge?" "Order!" " I have no objection to that." " Neither do I." "I'm gonna release you on your own recognizance." "Court will reconvene at 2.45 p.m. At the new deal used car lot... where I am going to settle this matter once and for all." "250 cars." "But you've brought no transport trucks." "How are you gonna get them home?" "I have 250 drivers." "What have I done to the children?" "everything you got." "How about some marijuana?" "Some rifles?" "take him up on the reefer." "This had better work!" "right?" "They're gonna get a crash course." "amigo!" "How about some rifles for your students?" "Chico!" "Bring some rifles!" "sir!" "I don't believe in violence!" "Forget about the rifles..." "I think she skipped town." "Good!" "I'll win the damn thing on a default." "This calls for a toast... to the man who in two hours will be the biggest car dealer in the southwest." "carmine." "Drivers!" "To your cars!" "do you read me?" "I just finished measuring these." "If we throw in the 26 cars on the lot... that gives us 18 feet safety margin." "That's one car." " That's playing it pretty close." " Are we going to make it in two hours?" "You girls ready for some heavy duty driving?" "left hand at 10 o'clock and right hand at 2 o'clock." "do you read?" "I'll be bringing it up to your rear... will you watch where the hell you're standing!" "nigger!" "This is the only Cadillac here and I don't drive in nothin' but a cadillac." "We're towing a car!" "Have you ever towed a car before?" " No." " Oh great!" "Drivers!" "Start your engines!" "I'm gonna have to take one hand off the wheel to start the car... are you?" "Just start the car." " You ready?" " Let's go." "Let's move 'em out!" "let's go!" " How fast are we going?" " Fifty-five." "I think we're going to be about half an hour late." "Everybody listen up!" "We're gonna have a lesson in driving history!" "This is how we used to drive on the highways:" "At seventy-five mph!" " Everybody seventy-five mph!" " Seventy-five!" "Put that pedal on the floor!" "I've got this motherfucker wide open!" "he's some kind of con man." "that's a $200 fine." "we don't have our license yet." "It's the police!" "Stop!" "Oh shit!" "Wait... always wait for the police to arrive." " This is eleven forty-four..." " They're here." "pal." "You'd better scout ahead for more cops." "We can't take any more chances." "ten-four." "carmine?" " Twenty-seven." "Look at that..." "I just heard some crazy shit on my police scanner." "There's a whole shitload of used cars headed this way." "You care about that?" "Shit!" "I hope you read me 'cause we got a real big problem." " What is it?" " Police roadblock." " What the hell are you gonna do?" " We're going to take a short cut." "Roy." "Did you see about 250 cars go by here?" "we haven't seen 'em yet." " Where the hell are they?" " Who cares?" "They'll never make it." "the only way they can get there on time is to drive as the crow flies." " I wouldn't worry about it." " What did you say?" "Never mind!" "Back up there and take a left!" "You pea-brained ignoramus!" "What a beautiful day." "going out to this used car lot?" "I could have been out playing golf." "There they are!" "Head for the lead truck!" "looks like we got company." "Fuchs!" "What the hell is this?" "Get out and get in the back!" "Get in the damn back!" "You're crazy!" "Don't give me no Goddamn lip!" "Get in the Goddamn back now!" "What the hell is he doing?" "Rudy!" "You want me to ram the son of a bitch?" "No!" "Keep going!" "We're running out of time!" "Pull over closer!" "Pull in behind them!" "Pull in behind them!" "Keep it going!" "Don't stop for anything!" "He's got a gun!" "you!" " Pull over!" " Get off of there!" "You motherfucker!" "Keep going!" "you fat-ass!" "man!" "I want you!" "I gotta have you!" "I'm gonna get you!" "brother!" " Follow the black car!" "Thanks for dropping in!" "Get away from me!" "Stop that truck!" "What am I supposed to do when someone's standing on the hood of my car?" "Close in!" "Faster!" "Move it up closer!" "Let go of him!" "You all right?" "let's move this chariot." "I still may be able to get in eight holes." "What the hell is this now?" "A mirror truck?" "I hope none of them's cracked... let's go!" "That's it!" "That's it!" "We made it!" "Nice job!" "That was some pretty heavy driving!" "aren't we?" "man!" "Mr Ghertner?" "as long as you promise to get your license in another state." "I think we got plenty of time." "Look who's coming!" "We made it!" "I know you're seeing the same thing with those itty-bitty beady eyes of yours." "that sure looks like a mile of cars to me." "your honour." "Measure them!" "Every one of them!" "sir!" "That's it!" "I tried... it's a red car." "we're going to be 18 feet short." "Dammit... come in!" "come in!" "Are you there?" "Come in!" "Are you there?" "Are you there?" "please!" " Where is he?" "I'm here." " Where's here?" "near highway 9." "Get over here!" "We're in a hurry!" "Without your car we're 18 feet short!" "Can't they measure them any faster?" "What do you expect me to do?" "Put roller skates on them boys?" "and there's red paint underneath... it's a red car!" "you can do it..." " which side of the tracks are you on?" " East." "He's on the wrong side." "The 2.45 is coming through." "You've got to do it!" " I can't do it." " Red cars don't mean shit!" "I'm sorry..." "listen to me... you're really driving a grey car." "we lose the lot." "nine inches." "Toby?" "Shit!" "Wouldn't you know it?" "For once the train's on time." "four inches." "nine inches." " Fourteen four." "Come on!" "four inches." "Is that the last car?" "What's the final total?" "Come on!" "One of these... it'd better be a grey car... you cheated!" "You cheated!" "you bastards!" "they're on the last car and they're short." "Five thousand two hundred and sixty-two and... eighteen will make a mile... right there!" "You're eighteen feet short." "Take it from the bumper!" "Ah... you're two inches short." "a mile of cars!" "Case dismissed!" "Wait a minute!" "Somebody pay you off?" "A license plate don't count!" "buddy!" "We won!" "Don't give me that shit!" "I'm gonna put your balls in a sling." "Deputies!" "Let's haul ass!" "come on... partner... what you did here today." "you're gonna have the best freeway access in the state." "You can have the biggest dealership in the southwest." "I know we've had our differences... you've got one downtown." "thanks a million." "Well... partners." "Don't partner me!" "You knew about that freeway the whole time." "this is the first I've heard of it." "are you sure?" " Trust me." "miss..." " Ma'am?" "What's that yellow paint doing on that car?" "Did it use to be a taxi?" "that car there." "that's yellow primer." " Yellow primer?" "that's being used on a lot of cars these days." "it adds life to the body..." "It's all a big shuffle cut and deal" "All the smart players got a way to steal" "If you're a believer you'll find out fast" "Like life and your pickup nothing's made to last" "Used car everybody's got one to trade" "Used car everybody's got one to sell beware yeah" "You gotta spit on it to make it shine" "You gotta hard sell it move it down the line" "Like an old lover it's slowing down" "You wanna change partners you gotta shop around" "Used car everybody's got one to trade" "Used car everybody's got one to sell beware" "Are you a spring dreamer ripe for love" "Spot a great body you've been dreamin' of" "So you go for it she's a heavy ten" "Paint peels off you've been ripped off again" "Used car everybody's got one to trade" "Used car everybody's got one to sell go to hell" "Used car everybody's got one to trade" "Used car everybody's got one to sell go to hell right" "Used car everybody's got one to trade" "Used car everybody's got one to sell go to hell" "Used car trust me" "Used car would I lie to you take care" "Subs improved by:" "HighCode"