"OMG, LOL, we caught up the Academy Award nominee" "Morgan Spurlock on the red carpet last night." "Check out that chick!" "But who's that fart knocker she's with?" "I've heard about this dude, he got famous just for, like, eating a lot for, like, 30 days." "Really..." "Yeah." "And once you're famous..." "I get eat more." "No dumbass, you get chicks." "Yeah, was gonna say that next." "We should do that." "Yeah, yeah, was gonna say that next." "This is the entry way..." "Is that 16 and pregnant?" "Maybe 13 and pregnant, I don't know." "Are doing pretty good, usually on that show everyone's all poor and living with their grandmas, and their mouths are hanging open." " Yeah, yeah, really." "And they're like, living off my tax dollars." "You know what I'm saying?" "It's not right." "You don't have any tax dollars." "Yeah." "That counter looks like it's made out of barf." " Yeah" "I think rich people do that, 'cause then if you barf on it," "You don't have to clean it up." "Yeah, yeah." "That's not how you make nachos." "Yeah, that's not how you do it." "You go to 7-eleven," "And you get that little," "That little paper thing," "And then you scoop the chips in there," "And then you, squeeze out the orange stuff on it." "Yeah." "This is the kids' play room." "I found these kids over at the park." "I bring them nachos once a day." "Yeah, and I make them do my homework." "One of our worries about building such a big house" "Was that we'd lose our kids." "When this guy talks," "It's like his teeth never come apart." "One of our biggest fears" "With the new house was losing our kids." "It was more of an experiment." "I mean they'd never... it's really just an experiment." "We had this crazy idea..." "Maybe he's like, one of those ventriloquists." " Yeah." "Yeah." "Yeah, they need to show the doll, then." "He's got his hand up his wife's butt." "I had to buy a waterfall and a wood slide," "I worked my whole damn life to pay for all this crap." "And, uh..." "Yeah, my wife makes me build all this stuff." "I'm miserable here, and..." "You can even see Zion National Park." "I tried to run away to Zion National Park," "But they saw me through that damn telescope." "Bye!" "So, like, when do we get the chicks?" "How..." "how does this work?" "We have to, like, only eat at Burger World for 30 days." "Like that Sherlock dude." "Cool." "How come we didn't think of this before?" "We're gonna get rich and famous just by eating." "And score!" "Hey, Butt-head, check it out." "I already ate, like, four burgers," "Three fries..." " And, six milkshakes." "Cool." "Ladies, beware." "Yech." "I don't feel so good." "Yeah?" "Good." "More chicks for me." "See you in a month, baby." "I'm full." "Why did we do this again?" "To get famous and get chicks." " Yeah, yeah, yeah." "We need more food." "Come on." "What are you guys doing here?" "You're not working today." "We're like, volunteering." "Yes, for the children, you know." " Okay, well," "Why don't you go clean the grill, and," "The food's on the house, okay?" "Yeah." "Yeah." "I feel kinda sexy." "Yeah." "We got it going on." "Okay, don't think of the letters on your tests" "As grades, so much as friendly reminders" "To study more." "Beavis, Butt-head," "If it was up to me, you could eat in class," "But the school board says you can't." "M'kay?" "We have to." "We're eating at Burger World for a month" "So we can get famous." " Yeah, yeah." "Like that Morgan Sherlock dude, you know what I'm saying?" "Of course, you're taking on corporate America" "To expose a very important issue to your generation." "Yeah." "This is great." "I'm so proud of you boys." "So, does this mean that we can eat in class too?" "No." "Only Beavis and Butt-head can eat in class." "They're engaged in an act of social protest," "Shining a light on the issue of teen obesity." "We're eating in front of you." "Yeah, you can't have any." "Now, it's so important that you get your message out." "Martin, maybe you can be part of this." "No, I meant film Beavis and Butt-head," "And then post it online." "Yeah, make a movie about us." "The three of you can all use this" "As your semester service project." "M'kay?" " Yeah." "Cool." "We didn't bring enough for everybody." "So, what made you want to shine a light" "On the issue of teen obesity?" "We wanted to get famous and score." "So, we, like, ate a lot of Burger World food." " Yeah, yeah, so," "Go ahead and nominate us for some rewards," "And, then we can get some chicks." "We ate a lot of Burger World food." "And now we're fat." "No way." "No one is gonna super-size us." "These guys need to be stopped." "Fire up the jet!" "They're trying to make gelato look exciting." "Orange chocolate!" "Papaya!" "Snooki, how you doing?" " Snooki, how you doin'?" "So when I meet a guy I'm going to do a checklist." "Ha ha." "Why not?" " Is that guy a foreigner, or a guido?" "I don't think they have foreign guidos." "What I would love to find is a guido." "Juice-head." "Can I find that somewhere?" "That's the world's fastest." "And then he put her to work." " Yeah, like, I have all these qualities." " I have match for you," " You and this mop." " Go on date with floor." " Start to work faster!" "Yeah!" "I leave you some work to you guys!" "Yeah." "My ideal guy." "Snooki's idea man guido." " Idea-l." "Tan guido juice-head gorilla." "Big sense of humor." "Likes to party." "Fist pumps..." "A poem, by Snooki." "Juice-heads and gorillas." "By Snooki Polizzi." "Our mission this week is to find Nicole a guy." "We gotta go to the beach, we gotta go... everywhere." " Yeah, we can't..." " We gotta go to the gym..." " Every day." " Every day." " Every day, we gotta..." " Go to the gym..." " Every day." " Every day." "How come they do that?" " They thi it's adorable." " You know... you know, I have a checklist, too," "It's..." "Okay," "She has to have at least one boob." "And... and... she has to be a girl." "And... and it can't be my mom." "I have the same list." "But it, like, includes your mom." " Shut up, Butt-head!" "Boy." "Boys," "Here's some gift cards to Taco Yummo." "They have unlimited funds." "That means it's all-you-can-eat." "Forever." "At Taco Yummo." "Not Burger World." "Cool." "Now we'll score for sure." " Yeah, yeah." "Are you sure about this, sir?" "Those two can eat a lot." "Believe me, the cost is well worth it." "Aw, they're making me sick." "Fire up the jet!" "I gotta sit down." "You there," "All chicks get free tacos." " Yeah, want some nachos?" "It's all on me." "You know, nachos sound pretty good." "Maybe even better than scoring." "Yeah." "More food for us." "Taco Yummo rules." "Yeah, yeah." "Yeah, Taco Yummo gets you fatter" "A lot quicker than Burger World." "These guys have to be stopped." "I need my plane, and a stack of gift cards to Weiner Shack." " I don't even understand" "What the problem is with teen obesity." "This is great." "Yeah." "Teen obesity kicks ass." "I'll have, hash browns and an egg muffin." "You said "muff."" "Then you said "in."" "Damn it, Butt-head, you were gone a long time!" "Yeah." "I took a big poop." "Yeah, yeah." "Look, can we get some service?" "Yeah, do you work here or what?" "Hey, Beavis, I just thought of something." "I'm at work, but like, I wasn't working." "I just got paid to take a dump." "Yeah, yeah." "Maybe they'd pay us to go pee too." "Only one way to find out." " Yeah, yeah." "I'm still waiting for my damn food!" "Is that Christ?" "What language is he speaking?" "I think it's Mexican." "Heh, you know, Butt-head," "You really shouldn't say that, I'm sorry." "Come on, you know better than that." "Yeah." "It's Spanish." "Wow!" "So Jesus can speak Spanish?" "That's..." "That's really pretty impressive, you know, 'cause that's not easy to learn a second language." "You know, not anybody can do that." "It is a miracle." "Yeah." "Yeah, that Christ is something else." "I didn't know he had it in him, you know?" "Yeah." "He may look like a bum, but he can do a lot." "This guy's like..." ""Okay, everybody, check out this new song" "I've been working on."" ""The beat kind of goes like this."" ""Okay?"" ""Come on, everybody." "Come on."" ""Join in, yeah."" ""Come on, bang your cans with me, come on."" ""and then, for the first verse," "I was thinking of this."" ""And then, for the chorus,"" "Maybe..." ""Wait a minute." "Don't escape yet." "I have one more verse." "Check this out."" " They really hate this song, don't they?" " These people would rather get shot" "Than listen to him anymore." "I didn't think he was that bad, you know?" " I kind of like it." "This is cool." "Yeah." "Better than out there." "I'll have a coffee... hello?" "Hello?" "Hello?" "Anyone there?" "Hello?" "What the hell's going on around here?" "Come on, Butt-head, let me sit down." "No way." "This is mine." "Damn it." "Let me see here." "Nah." "This'll do." "H, that's better." "Yeah." "This is cool." "I..." "I'm sorry." "You're gonna have to wait your turn, sir." "Yeah." "Check it out." "We're getting paid." "I've been waiting a half hour." "Screw this." "I'm going somewhere else." "H, that's better." "I needed that." "Yeah." "Bathroom breaks kick ass." "No." "No, no, no, no, no." "I want a milkshake." "Let's go to the bathroom, Beavis." "I can't deal with this right now." "This is cool." "Hello?" "Anybody here?" "What the hell?" "Excuse me." "We're gonna be a while, so, you know..." "Just lock the door, Beavis." "These damn people won't stop bothering us!" "How are we supposed to earn a living?" "Yeah, really." "It's lunchtime, Beavis." "Yeah." "About time." "Finally!" "I'll have a cheeseburger, fries..." " Yeah, yeah." "Cheeseburger." " Medium orange soda, no ice..." " Good idea." "See ya later." "Where are you going?" " I'm working." " Hello?" " What's going on out there?" " This is ridiculous." " Man..." " Beavis, Butt-head!" "Where are those two?" "Hey, are you gonna take our order?" "Yes." "Yes." "I'm so sorry." "Just one moment, please." "I will be right with all of you, okay?" "Hurry up!" " Beavis, Butt-head, open this door right now!" " We're taking a dump, sir." "I'm sorry." " You're gonna have to wait your turn." " Yeah." "We need some privacy." " We're going to the bathroom, buttmunch." "What are you two doing?" "We had to use the bathroom, sir." "They said you've been in there for a half hour!" "Well, I think the food here gave us diarrhea, sir." " It always does." "Look, I don't care how bad you have to go to the bathroom," "You get back to work right now, or you're fired!" "Wait just a minute." "I'm a lawyer for the Labor Safety Organization." "God..." "So what?" "These workers have the right to take" "As long of a bathroom break as they need." "Really?" "Yeah." "It's the law." "The law rules." "Well..." "I..." "Well, I'm sorry." "I wasn't aware of that then." "Can you get my order now?" "We've been waiting for a long time here!" "Come on already!" "Yes, yes, of course." "I'm so sorry, everybody." "Okay, Beavis, take the register." "Butt-head, you get in the kitchen." "No." "We're on our bathroom break." "Yeah, it's the law." "Poop!" "Where's my burgers?" "Okay, I'm so sorry." "I will get your order in just a moment." "I ordered a vanilla shake, not strawberry!" "Okay." "I apologize." "Let me fix that." "I just..." "Okay..." "I'll clean that..." "Mop." "Where..." "Okay, everyone, just bear with me, okay?" "I..." "I..." "I just..." "I'll take your order in just a moment, sir." "I just need to get these fries in, and then..." "Where's the manager?" "I gotta go to the bathroom so bad." "I..." "I'll be right back." " Right back" " Where are you going?" " No." "Excuse me, sir." "How we doing today?" "Please go back inside." "I'll be there in just a minute." "Okay, sir, why don't you go ahead and put it away," "Zip it up, and put your hands against the wall." "No, I..." "I'm the manager here, Okay?" "We've had a problem..." "Sir, hands against the wall, feet apart, now!" "You cannot do that here." "That's public urination." "Look, if you would just go..." "God!" "And that's indecent exposure." "We got a 311 at Burger World." "We're gonna need backup." "Work kicks ass." "Yeah, yeah." "You punched in, right?" "Yeah, yeah." "I'm gonna see if I can, like, get more hours now..." "If it's gonna be like this" "This is cool."