"Your kid sister?" "My sister Eileen." "What's this Doll's House, a kid show with fairies?" "It's a well-known classic." ""Not since the debutt of the..."" "Debut." "Debut." "Okay, "Not since the debut of the great Sarah Bernhardt" ""has an audience been held so spellbound as" ""that which witnessed the remarkable performance of Ibsen's A Doll's House" ""by a young Columbus girl, Eileen Sherwood."" "You're sure pouring it on, ain't ya?" "When did this happen?" "It's happening tonight at 8:30." "What?" "Hey, something new." "Now they're writing them before they see them." "I won't have time to write it after the show." "We're having a party tonight at the house for Eileen." "A party!" "With the dolls?" "Will you scram?" "Say, I thought the boss' daughter was the star of that thing." "That's tomorrow." "They're alternating, tonight Eileen, tomorrow Annie." "Here it is, Mr. Hawkins, and here's Eileen's picture." "You blow it up big, like you promised." "Jerusalem, this blurb for an amateur theatrical?" "And I want it in every edition, beginning with the one that goes on the streets tonight." "What are you trying to do, push the war out of the paper?" "You promised me you'd give Eileen a break, now didn't you?" "Yeah, provided you take care of the boss' daughter tomorrow night." "Okay." "And just as many adjectives or there'll be trouble." "Believe me, I'll do Annie up just fine." "Well, see that you do." "Leave it to me." "I'll give her the works." "Two more minutes." "But, George, I still say I should have played the doctor..." "Curtains." "Hello, Billy." "You look great." "Dad, Grandma, you wait till you see the crowd outside, and wait till you see the review I've written." "It's absolutely marvelous." "Where's Eileen?" "I've got to see her." "Pardon me." "Pardon me." "What's the matter?" "What's happened?" "We don't know." "We were in there and all of a sudden Mr. Heller came in with Annie." "lt looks like dirty work at the crossroads." "Dirty work?" "What kind of a..." "Hello." "What happened?" "A last-minute change." "Annie Wilkinson's playing the part tonight." "What?" "Remember, we're very, very late." "I said how come?" "My sister won the toss, didn't she?" "Yes, but..." "Yes, but Annie's father owns a newspaper and he put the pressure on." "Quiet, please." "Quiet nothing." "I'll tear this place apart." "Mr." "Heller, you can't do this." "It's all settled." "What's..." "You're not going to..." "Annie, on stage." "Annie." "Annie!" "Miss Wilkinson, if you don't mind." "Well, get her." "Now, folks, for the last three weeks I've been telling you that..." "Mr. Heller, I want to tell you what's going on, and you're not..." "Now, folks, all of you, you'll have to get out front." "Yes, you try and put us out." "I'm not..." "Will you please listen to me?" "Eileen's review is already written." "It's in the paper now." "Ready, everybody." "Please." "That paper'll be on the streets in an hour." "It says she's sensational in A Doll's House," "Curtain!" "Curtain!" "Her picture's in the paper..." "Hide the Christmas tree carefully, Helen." "Well, that..." "You little..." "Eileen, are you going to cry all night?" "Yes!" "Then take that black stuff off your eyes." "It's getting all over the pillow." "Holy smoke, you're a sight." "Nice piece of writing anyway, Ruth." "You're getting better and better." "You'd better frame it, Grandma." "That's fini for me on the Courier," "I'm the laughingstock of Columbus." "That paper is all over town, and everybody knows I didn't play the part." "I'll never be able to show my face in this town again." "Neither will I, Eileen, if that's any comfort to you." "Now, girls, there's nothing we can do about this anyway." "Let's get to bed." "It's 2:00." "Dad, now that I've lost this job, I've always felt that..." "Ruth, I'm not going to discuss New York all over again." "Why, you can get another job right here in Columbus." "You can go back to teaching." "But I..." "She doesn't want to go back to teaching." "She wants to write, and she ought to be where magazines and publishers are." "Mother, are you encouraging this insanity?" "Sure!" "You're just talking a lot of old-fashioned twaddle." "What's a girl to do, sit around home just because it's home until some local dope decides to marry her?" "Columbus boys are not dopes." "Why, I was born and brought up here myself." "Now, Son, be reasonable." "She wants a career, and she's got plenty on the ball, and if she thinks New York is the place to be..." "Why, certainly, it's where Ruth should be." "That's where all the publishers are." "That's where everybody is." "I certainly think we ought to go." "You, too?" "Well, naturally, that's where all the theaters are, too." "And what kind of a career can I have around here?" "Ruth wouldn't think of going without me, would you?" "Well, of course not." "No." "No, of course not, Eileen." "Dad, there's no reason why she shouldn't go with me." "I won't hear of it." "Won't hear of it." "Good night." "Jeez." "Girls, you can start packing right after breakfast." "Grandma." "Grandma." "I wonder what those boys at the Little Theater will think when I'm an actress in New York." "Well, that's the advantage of not leaving any men behind." "I don't have to worry what becomes of them." "I know, dear, it's different with you." "Boys never meant anything in your life." "Not after they got a load of you they didn't." "Gee, I've got more of your junk in there than my own." "Eileen, where's my typewriter?" "Well, it was right there on the desk." "Well, it's gone." "Who took it?" "Grandma!" "Grandma!" "What's the matter?" "My typewriter's..." "Sure, I traded it in." "Got in just ahead of that new installment buying law." "Oh, gee, darling." "How can I ever repay you?" "That's simple." "Just write another Gone With The Wind," "It's a cinch." "Come on, come on, shake a leg!" "It's 5 miles to the bus depot." "Darling, can you grab my hat there?" "Yes." "Excuse me, Grandma." "You'd better hurry if you want to be on that bus." "We have plenty of time." "No, we haven't." "Grandma, where did I put my purse?" "How the dickens would I know?" "Well, let's look for it." "Hurry, Eileen, we've got to go clear across town." "Don't worry." "Ruth, here are the tickets and $100." "I wish we didn't have to take this." "It's all right." "That'll get you started, and then every month or so whatever I can spare..." "Thank you, darling, but maybe you won't have to at all." "You mustn't worry about it." "Where in the world could you have put it?" "You'll watch over Eileen, won't you?" "Of course I will." "Here it is." "Thank you, Grandma." "Now, hurry, Eileen." "We're late now." "We'll never make that bus." "We'll be on it." "I've arranged everything." "Hello, Harvey." "So nice of you to come." "Did you say watch over Eileen?" "Eileen watch over me." "Hurry up, Ruth, you know Harvey has a schedule to make." "Goodbye, Grandma." "Goodbye, darling." "Goodbye, Dad." "Goodbye, dear." "Well, goodbye, Dad." "Write often." "I will darling, yes." "Good." "I'm going to keep up with your career." "I'll be buying all the magazines..." "Yes!" "Yes, you do that, Grandma." "Goodbye." "Goodbye, Dad." "Well, I hope you're satisfied, Mother." "Happiest day of my life." "Taxi?" "Oh, boy, New York." "Take your bag, lady?" "Taxi?" "Yes, thanks." "No, thanks." "Give that right back." "Eileen, we carry our own bags, and we carry our own bodies." "The first thing we've gotta do is buy a paper and look up the rooms for rent." "Must we do that?" "Ruth, let's stop at a hotel and get a nice fresh start in the morning." "Eileen, maybe I should have told you earlier." "You know this $100?" "That's the last money we ever take from Dad." "The last?" "The last." "But supposing..." "Then we starve." "We beg, we borrow or steal." "Darling, is that a promise?" "Yes, Ruth." "All right." "We'd better check the heavy bag then start looking for the room." "Come on." "All right." "I think it's foolish to look for anything when our vitalities are so low." "Here, you hold this." "If things get tough, we can always flop in one of these." "Gee, I can't get this key out." "Well, try this one, Ruth." "I will not." "I've got a dime invested in this locker." "I'll tear it apart first." "Having trouble?" "Yes, a little." "Well, allow me." "Easy does it." "Hot, isn't it?" "Yeah, but you'll cool off." "Wasn't that nice?" "Fresh guy." "Come on, Eileen." "Now you take the overnight case, and I'll take the typewriter." "Well, this is the last one on the list." "Ruth, no matter what it is, if it's got a bed in it, let's take it." "Gee, I had no idea rents were so high." "This doesn't look like much, does it?" "Good evening." "Good evening, my dear young ladies." "Am I wrong in presuming that you are looking for a haven in this troubled world?" "No." "No, we're just looking for a room." "Seek no more." "You have reached your goal." "We have?" "Absolutely." "How high up is it?" "lt is not up." "It's down." "Hey." "Follow me, young ladies, and I will show you the best value for your money you can buy in Greenwich Village." "Come in, my dear young ladies, enter." "Isn't it just what you've been dreaming about?" "Come in, come in." "Don't be bashful." "Make yourself right at home." "Thank you." "It's really very..." "But, you see, as yet we haven't decided whether or not we want to..." "Wait." "Note the exquisite imitation fireplace and these big comfortable day beds." "Just look at that interesting and exciting dormer window." "Look, life passes up and down in front of you like a regular parade." "What more could a young person with a typewriter want?" "Am I wrong in presuming that you are an author?" "Haven't you anything higher up?" "Higher up." "Higher up." "My dear young lady, why don't you let me show you the place" "before you raise a lot of objections?" "Yes, Ruth, let Mr..." "Appopolous." "Yes, show us the place." "You have a head on your shoulders, young lady." "And now, let me point out a few features of this beautiful suite." "A, it is summer." "B, it is at least 30 degrees cooler down here than anywheres higher up." "C, it is only $45 a month." "$45?" "Thank you very much, Mr. Appopolous." "We'll let you know." "Come on, Eileen." "Ruth, couldn't we stay here for a few days and then if we like it we can..." "I'll do better than that." "You can have the place for a month, on trial, at absolutely no cost to you." "Then if you are not 100% satisfied," "I will give you back your first month's rent." "The whole month?" "The whole month." "And August has 31 days." "Do you mind if I go outside and talk it over with my sister?" "What is there to talk over?" "You see the place, you know the price." "I'll tell you what, we'll go down to the bus terminal and pick up our baggage." "What for?" "Why have I got a handyman?" "Jenson." "Jenson." "Wait a minute, we haven't decided anything yet." "Now, I am going to show you where everything is." "In there, we have a model kitchenette, complete in every detail." "Adjacent is a luxurious bathroom." "They're awfully small." "Small." "In those two rooms you won't entertain." "And you, young lady, are you artistic and fussy like your sister?" "Well, I'm going to try to get a job on the stage." "An actress." "Well, you certainly have the face and build for it." "Thank you." "What, Mr. Appopolous?" "Jenson, go to the bus station and get these young ladies' bags." "But we haven't said we'd take it." "This places you under absolutely no obligations." "And I'm so tired." "Well..." "When am I gonna fix the water pipes?" "There's been a lot of hollering." "Never mind the hollering." "There's been no hollering at all." "He's crazy." "Go ahead." "These poor tired girls want to go to bed." "And I'll tell you what I'll do." "If you take these luxurious rooms," "I will leave that painting exactly where it is." "It's charming." "Yeah, who did it?" "Me." "Painting is one of my interests." "I also write epic poetry and epic drama." "Well, ladies, what do you say?" "The painting stays." "Let's take it, Ruth." "I can't see what we can lose." "Mr. Appopolous said he would give us our money back." "Legally, you have me where you want me." "I gave my word in front of two witnesses." "Three, including me." "Please, Ruth." "Well, all right, Eileen, but remember now..." "I won't blame you, don't worry." "$10, $20, $30, $40," "$41, $42, $43, $44..." "$45." "What was that?" "What was what?" "That noise." "The whole room shook." "That just shows you how you'll get used to it." "I didn't even notice it." "Get used to it?" "You mean it happens all the time?" "You won't even be conscious of it." "A little blasting, the new subway." "You mean they're blasting right underneath us?" "What are you worrying about?" "Those engineers know how much dynamite to use." "But does it go on all the time?" "No, no, they knock off at midnight, and they don't start again until 6:00 in the morning." "6:00 in the morning?" "6:00 in the morning?" "We can't stay here." "Listen, in New York you live either, A, over a subway, or B, where they're building a subway, or C, you don't live in New York." "Stop double-talking and give us our money back." "What are you getting so hysterical about?" "I said I would give you your money back, and I will, if at the end of the month you are still dissatisfied." "Good night, ladies." "Sleep tight." "Ruth, what are we going to do?" "We're going to do 30 days." "Hey, get away from there." "Go on." "Go on, scram." "Boy, that Appopolous must be some bingo player." "Look at all this stuff he's won." "Ruth, we ought to have this phone connected in the morning so we can start calling up for jobs." "You don't call up for jobs, dear." "You go out and look for them." "The devil with it, let it spread." "I hope some fresh air gropes its way in here." "It's stifling." "Didn't I just put out the light?" "There's a lamppost right in front of the window." "Pull the shade down." "There isn't any shade." "No shade?" "We're practically sleeping out in the street." "Wait till I get that Appopolous." "Nice comfortable day beds." "Like sleeping in an iron lung." "Would it help any to close the window, Ruth?" "If we do, we'll suffocate." "I'm afraid." "You know a dog could chase a cat through there." "And probably will." "Well, let's get some sleep." "Maybe we can forget." "Good night, Ruth." "Good night." "What was that?" "lt sounded like a machine gun." "Gee, Ruth, I'm awfully sorry." "Forget it." "I'm not going back there, that's all there is to it." "Why not?" "In the first place, they'll soak us another cover charge." "No, they won't." "And you can have those two dames." "You can..." "Now, you get away from there, you drunken loafers." "A dame." "You go away from there or we'll call the police." "Another dame." "Hey, Pete!" "Look, two babes." "One for you, too." "But that one's mine." "Okay, mine's not so bad." "You go away from there." "Hello, cutie pie." "Get away, get away, get away!" "I'm fit as a fiddle and ready for love" "Ruth, close that window." "Me, close the window?" "Don't you do it, Ruthie." "I'd rather see her close it." "Ruth, please." "Look out behind you." "Come on, cutie, come to papa." "You take your hands away from there or I'll bust them off." "What's going on here?" "Come on, break it up." "Break it up." "We're just making a social call, there, Officer." "We was just leaving." "Good night." "Go on, get out." "Go on." "I'm awful glad you came, Officer." "Say, you're new in this neighborhood, ain't you?" "Yeah, we just moved in today." "Well, if you're smart, you'll move out tomorrow." "I like things nice and quiet on my beat." "I'm warning you." "Did you hear what he said, Eileen?" "Yes, I did." "Ruth, I'm afraid." "It'll be all right, darling." "It'll be all right." "Pardon me, please." "Excuse me, please." "Excuse me." "Mr. Wallace, please." "Name?" "Eileen Sherwood, Columbus Little Players." "You'll have to wait." "Well, I haven't much time," "and I'm sure if you told Mr..." "Say, listen, toots." "Columbus Little Players." "Say, that's big time." "I'm Chic Clark, theatrical reporter on the Globe," "Always glad to meet any member of the Columbus Little Players." "How about an interview, Miss Sherwood?" "Why, thank you." "Well, let's go over in the corner and talk it over, huh?" "Now, I don't want you to feel self-conscious or hold out on me or worry about a thing." "Just tell me all about yourself, huh, sugar?" "I have some new sketches." "Yes, Mr. Kinskey, take them to the art department." "I'd like to see..." "The manuscript?" "Yes, I want to see some of the..." "Sorry, no appointments with authors." "No manuscripts accepted here." "Mail it in." "Mail it?" "I've been mailing them all my life." "Sorry, that's the rule here." "That's all right." "I have an appointment with Mr. Craven." "I'm sorry, he's busy." "You will have to wait." "Thank you." "You don't want an editor." "You want a rubber stamp." "I want circulation." "Well, let me alone and I'll get it for you." "What have you got there?" "Let me run The Manhatter for three months with my policy and without your interference." "You're talking to the owner of The Manhatter," "And the biggest bottleneck in the whole organization." "People don't want it, Frank, all that high-class society rubbish week after week." "This is good." "Look, let me change the policy slowly," "just as a trial." "That's fine." "Put that through." "Let me run one human incident a week, just one, a story, an article, a poem." "And you know exactly what people want?" "Well, what you want isn't selling." "So let's go bankrupt your way, is that it?" "On second thought, let's go bankrupt your way." "It's much quicker." "That's all for today." "Go on, get out." "Hey." "Hey, you, can you read?" "Well, of course I can read." "Well, do you read?" "Yes, yes, and I write, too." "Here's one of my stories." "Never mind about writing." "Everybody writes in New York," "even people who can't read." "Well, I happen to be from Columbus." "Very interesting." "Now you think carefully." "Have you ever read The Manhatter?" "No, no, not in years." "I have..." "Good, come with me." "What do you want now?" "Who's this?" "Mr." "Craven, meet Miss..." "What's your name?" "Sherwood." "Ruth Sherwood." "Meet Miss Ruth Sherwood." "She can read." "From Columbus, Ohio, the middle of the universe." "Meet Mr. Craven, the owner of all the Craven publications." "How do you do?" "Sherwood?" "What does she do?" "I just told you." "She can read." "Now, Miss Sherwood, in your time you have read The Manhatter, lsn't that true?" "Yes." "When was the last time?" "Years ago." "Years ago?" "Why did you stop reading it?" "Who cares why she stopped reading it?" "Take her out of here." "Why?" "Well, it just didn't interest me." "Why not?" "Well, because..." "Well, there are many more magazines that I liked a lot better." "That's no answer." "Can't you explain why, or don't you have any opinion?" "Opinions?" "From Columbus, Ohio?" "We think in Columbus, Ohio, too, you know." "As a matter of fact, we think your magazine's about 15 years behind the times." "Go on, go on." "You do, do you?" "Yes, yes, we do." "People used to go for that chichi and fakey talk." "They didn't know any better, but life's become a lot more real now." "Has it?" "Yes, yes, it has." "People are aware of things." "We have radio now and movies, and we're right in the middle of the war." "When you come up against cold hard facts, the phony things are shown up pretty quick." "The Manhatter, That's just a bore, not only to Columbus, Ohio, but in 90% of the nation." "Thank you, Miss Sherwood." "Wait a minute." "Where did you find this girl?" "Just outside." "What was she doing there?" "Miss Sherwood, the gentleman is trying to make a point of some kind." "Tell him, tell us all, what were you doing out there?" "I was trying to submit a manuscript." "To which one of my magazines?" "The Manhatter," "That's all I want to know." "Your guinea pig slams The Manhatter, but she'd like her material published in it." "Well, now wait just one minute..." "Good day, Miss Columbus." "Mr." "Baker will pay you off outside." "lf you'd like to know the truth," "I came to The Manhatter in desperation." "It was the last magazine I could think of." "Well, what do you know?" "And now that I've met the brains of the organization, I'm sorry I came at all." "Down please." "Where'd that girl go?" "She just went down the elevator." "Ruth Sherwood, 233 Barrow Street." "Strawberries, 10 cents a box." "Strawberries, 10 cents a box." "Are you hurt?" "No." "Mrs. McGillicudy must have moved her clothesline." "You're one of the new girls, huh?" "My name's Loomis." "My wife and I live upstairs." "How do you do, Mr. Loomis?" "Leave out the mister." "Just call me Wreck." "Wreck?" "Yeah, that's what they called me at Georgia Tech." "I'd'a made All-American, only I was expelled." "Is your sister home?" "I expect her any minute now." "Well, that's swell, because my wife and I have got something we want to talk over with you." "Spaghetti and meatballs?" "I smelled them coming by yesterday." "They taste a lot better the second day." "Sure." "Say, you know, some night we all get together I'll cook you up a dinner." "Anything you want, pot roast, leg of lamb, shrimps Creole..." "Gee, your wife's a mighty lucky girl." "I don't know." "If I had a job she'd keep house for me." "Well, we'll be down a little later and talk it over," "'cause we've got to know by tonight." "Know what?" "Watch me nail this guy." "Get out of here, you ragamuffins." "I know where you can put that." "Are you there, Eileen?" "Hello, Ruth." "Any luck?" "Terrific." "I met an editor and the owner of a whole magazine chain." "Why, Ruth, you're in!" "Yes, they got me in to throw me out." "What about you?" "I had the most exciting day." "I was in the outer waiting room of Wallace Productions." "Now you're getting someplace." "And I met this man, Mr. Clark, a newspaperman on the Globe, and what do you think?" "What?" "He interviewed me." "But did you get in to see Mr. Wallace, dear?" "Well, no." "But don't you see?" "If I wait till this interview comes out, Mr. Wallace will come to see me, and so will all the other producers." "That was Mr. Clark's advice, I gather." "And I told him all about you, and he seemed very interested." "So interested in me he can't wait to get you alone, huh?" "Don't be silly." "He's going to speak to his city editor about you." "Well, from here on it's clear sailing." "What've we got for dinner?" "Spaghetti and meatballs." "Haven't we polished that off yet?" "Hello, young ladies." "How's everything?" "What do you hear from your other tenants?" "Hey, those are my manuscripts." "This is more important." "What about the shade for that window?" "Please, not until after my exhibit." "I am giving a one-man show on my paintings, a complete exhibition of the art of Appopolous." "Complete from A to B?" "I'm warning you, I'm taking that painting in a few days so prepare yourselves." "We'll hang the Sunday funnies up there." "You must forgive Eileen, Mr. Appopolous." "I keep telling her not to confuse the artist with his personality, but she still thinks you're a jerk." "Well, I suppose it is a result of the general world hysteria." "Good day, young ladies." "Keep writing, keep acting." "Where art is concerned, don't never give up." ""Keep writing, keep acting." He certainly knows just where to plunge the knife." "Ruth, we ought to have something for dessert." "You're dressed." "Would you go down to the bakery?" "Let's skip dessert, dear." "But we can't, dear." "There's a man coming for dinner." "Who?" "What man?" "Frank Lippincott." "Now, who is Frank Lippincott?" "Didn't I tell you about that boy who manages the National Drug Store on 44th Street?" "Nope." "Frank's a very nice boy." "He didn't let me pay my lunch check." "Eileen, why don't you wander into The Ritz someday?" "And I wanted you to meet him, Ruth, so when you're in the neighborhood, you can have your lunch there, too." "I have a feeling that before long that drug store's going to be under new management." "Don't be silly." "As long as you're going, Ruth, you might just as well cash in these six milk bottles." "You know, it's wonderful the way you manage with only one maid." "Yes?" "Hello." "Yes?" "Hot, isn't it?" "Effie home?" "I'm afraid you've got the wrong apartment." "That's all right." "I know Effie very well." "Well, I don't." "Now if you don't get out of here I'm going to call the police." "They won't put me out." "I'm an air-raid warden." "All right, you asked for it." "Now you're going to get it." "Mr. Loomis, Mr. Loomis, Mr. Loomis." "How do you do?" "How do you do?" "Hot, isn't it?" "Yeah, yeah, it is." "I hope you don't mind spaghetti and meatballs." "Love it." "Would you mind getting me a glass of water?" "Not at all." "It's a pleasure." "Now we'll soon see, Mr. Smarty." "I'm afraid it's not very cold." "Don't give him anything." "What?" "He's nobody." "You mean he's not the drug store?" "No, of course not." "Then who is he?" "I don't know." "He just walked in, and he won't go away." "Make him go away, Ruth." "Now you go away." "No." "Be careful." "He's an air-raid warden." "Where's his sand and shovel?" "I don't care what he is." "You get out of here and stop bothering my sister." "Go on." "No." "What's the trouble, girls?" "This man walked in here, and he won't go away." "Hey, what's the idea of crashing in on these girls?" "Now don't get yourself excited." "It's just a mistake." "You bet it's a mistake." "Now get moving." "Very well." "Good afternoon." "You're the hairiest landlady I ever saw." "Why, you..." "Thank you, Mr. Loomis." "I don't know what we would have done." "Well, that's all right." "Helen!" "Oh, Helen!" "Eileen." "Are you sure you never met that man before?" "Don't be silly." "He was looking for a girl named Effie." "Say, Wreck, is there an Effie in this place?" "There used to be." "She used to live in this studio before you girls moved in." "She was some kind of a medium, used to give psychic readings or something." "I hope she didn't leave any trumpets or tambourines floating around." "What happened, Wreck?" "Everything's all right, honey." "Girls, this is my wife." "How do you do?" "How do you do?" "Have you asked the girls about it yet, dear?" "Well, not yet, baby." "Well, there isn't much time, and we've got to get it settled." "Yeah." "Well, you see, it's like this." "Helen's mother is going to visit her, which kind of straight-arms me right out into the alley." "Haven't you enough room?" "Well, we could make room, only, you see, Helen's mother doesn't know that we're married." "And I'm afraid to tell her, because the Wreck isn't working now." "But I start to work just as soon as the professional football season opens." "So we thought that in the meantime you two girls wouldn't mind putting me up in your kitchen." "What?" "You mean sleep in our kitchen?" "He won't be in your way, really." "You'd feel a lot safer with the Wreck around, and he's awfully handy." "Why, he can clean up, and he irons swell." "Yeah, but no washing, that's woman's work." "But..." "You see..." "What about a hotel?" "We haven't got a cent." "No." "Well, maybe we could do it for one night." "Hey, wait a minute, we're crowded enough as it is." "Thank you, girls." "You don't know how much you're helping us." "Gee, that's swell." "I'll get my stuff together right away." "I know, but you see..." "Thanks again, girls." "Something tells me you weren't quite ready to leave Columbus." "That must be Frank." "Let him in, will you, Ruth?" "I've got to change my dress." "What's that guy's last name again?" "Lippincott." "Lippincott." "And remember, Ruth, he's a very nice boy." "Please be careful." "Who am I?" "Tugboat Annie?" "Come in." "Gee, I..." "I'm sorry." "I didn't know there were any..." "That's all right." "Everybody does that." "You're Mr. Lippincott." "Yes." "Yeah, and I guess you're Eileen's sister." "I can see a family resemblance all right." "I'm very flattered." "Of course, you're a different type." "Yeah, I see what you mean." "Do sit down, Mr. Lippincott." "Dear sister's just freshening up a bit." "She'll be out in a minute." "Ruth." "Yes, Sister, what is it, dear?" "I'll be out in a minute." "You see, I wasn't lying." "Eileen's been telling me about your drug store." "Has she?" "I understand you have awfully good food." "It's the best and very reasonable." "Reasonable isn't the word, as I understand it." "What?" "Why, Frank, I'm so sorry." "That's all right." "Your sister and I had a nice little talk." "Yes, you would have been proud of me, dear." "I didn't make one slip," "did I, Mr. Lippincott?" "What?" "May I take your hat?" "Thanks." "This is for you." "Frank, you shouldn't have done that." "It's some California red wine." "I thought it would go good with the spaghetti." "It's a special we're running this week." "So's our spaghetti." "I bet you're just famished." "Dinner's almost ready." "Say, this is great." "You know, I've always wanted to live in a studio like this." "Well, I'd better set the table." "Well, do you mind if I help you?" "Why, Frank, how nice." "Hello." "Well, what do you want?" "I'm looking for a party named..." "Sherwood, Eleanor Sherwood." "You mean Eileen." "Yeah, yeah, come to think of it, Eileen." "What a day." "Absolute murder, ain't it?" "And who shall I say is calling?" "Clark, Chic Clark's the name." "The newspaperman." "How does it look?" "On you it looks good." "Who are you?" "Well, I'm her sister." "Sister?" "She's a blonde good-looking kid, ain't she?" "Yeah, she's a blonde good-looking kid, ain't she." "Mr. Lippincott, this is Mr. Clark." "How do you do?" "How are you?" "Mr. Lippincott is with the National Drug Stores." "Yeah?" "I buy all my clothes there." "Quite a card, aren't you, Mr. Clark?" "This wine looks heavenly, Frank." "Why, hello, Mr. Clark." "Hi, Eleanor, I got some great news for you." "The boss says we run the interview this week. "Columbus girl," ""just busting with talent, will consider parts in better Broadway productions."" "Why, Chic, I mean, Mr. Clark, why, that's just wonderful." "Ruth, this is the newspaperman who was so interested in you." "Ruth wants to do newspaper work, Frank, and Mr. Clark's going to help her." "That's nice." "I sure am, gorgeous." "You know, I have been turning you over in my mind all afternoon." "Well, we were just about to have dinner." "I've had mine." "Go right ahead, don't mind me." "I don't think it will be very amusing for you, Mr. Clark." "What's in the bottle?" "It's a very fine California Burgundy-type wine." "It's a special." "Well, let's all have a drink, shall we?" "Do we need any ice?" "No, no, no, this wine should be served at the temperature of the room." "Well, then you'd better cook it for a couple of hours." "Why don't you come back when the new subway is finished?" "We expect a draft in through here all day long." "Miss Sherwood?" "Thank you." "Mr. Clark." "No, thanks." "I'll skip this round." "Well, here's to us and to Burgundy California." "Frank, I'm so sorry." "I'm terribly sorry." "What happened?" "That's a shame." "What was that?" "Hey, you, what are you doing there?" "Come here." "Come here, you." "Hey, come here, you." "Hey." "Come on, you, I've got you." "Get up here." "Take your hands off me, you big slug." "Now, what do you think you're doing running around in your drawers?" "Will you tell this big clown I'm okay?" "Yes, he's all right, I hope." "Well, I found him out in the alley with all those bedclothes." "I think he's some kind of a fiend." "You're crazy." "I'm gonna live here." "Live here?" "ln the kitchen." "It's all right, Officer." "We know him." "It's you two." "I thought I warned you to move outta my beat." "Why, how dare you?" "Wait a minute." "Officer, I don't know what you think, but if it's what I think you think" "you're sniffing up the wrong tree." "Yeah, see here, Officer." "And who do you think you are?" "I'll tell you who I am." "Stop it." "Who cares who anybody is?" "What's the difference?" "Anybody walks in here, everybody walks in here." "I am doorman at the Russian Blini." "She passed out." "Now, who's that?" "It's Effie." "Effie?" "She's early tonight." "Well, wait a minute." "Take that out of here." "She doesn't live here." "Please, this is not the first time I take her home." "Good night." "Well, for a place with a bad location and no neon sign, we're doing a whale of a business." "Now, who's that?" "Mr. Baker." "Good evening, Miss Sherwood." "I read your material." "I'd like to discuss it." "What did you say?" "I said I read your material." "Yeah, that's what I thought you said..." "Ruth!" "She's fainted." "Ruth!" "Rub her hands." "Ruth." "Do you feel all right now?" "Sure." "Where are we going?" "Someplace we can talk." "We certainly couldn't do it back there." "Holy smoke, you live in a menagerie." "Who are all those people?" "Well, they seem just..." "Looked like a three-ring circus." "How long have you lived in that place?" "Well, now, let..." "That certainly is the black hole of Calcutta." "Who was that guy with the wine all over his suit?" "A friend of my..." "And, say, what do you mean by running out of my office today like that?" "Come on, answer me." "You don't seem to wait for an answer, Mr. Baker." "Don't I?" "I'm sorry." "I'm apt to do that when I've got a lot to talk about." "Look, I hope you don't mind my rushing you away like that." "No, not at all." "We were just about to sit down to dinner" "when all of a sudden these..." "You're hungry?" "Well, why didn't you speak up?" "So am I." "Driver," "corner of 3rd Avenue and 43rd." "Yes, sir." "That's the best food you've ever had in your life." "Really?" "They make a dish there that's fit for kings, spaghetti and meatballs." "You'll never know what you did for me today." "What a guinea pig you turned out to be." "Here, great, isn't it?" "Can't eat this stuff too often, though." "Makes you fat." "I shouldn't wonder." "What an earful you gave the boss." "Beautiful." "For a girl from the backwoods, you're pretty shrewd." "Where you get all that sense?" "Well, Grandma used to say that..." "What's the difference?" "You've got it." "You know, I've been having this fight with Craven on policy for years, all alone, and then you come along and state the case better than I did myself." "You really know what I'm driving at." "I tell you I've been a pretty lonely man up to this minute, but I feel I can talk to you." "Look, I need advice." "What do you think I ought to do?" "Offhand, I'd say..." "Let me tell you what's been going on with Craven ever since I took this job." "Here, here, what's the matter?" "Have you had enough?" "You did read my stories, didn't you?" "What?" "Yes, I told you I did." "I left them in the office." "Now, here, where was I?" "What was that point I was trying to make?" "You were saying something..." "Gee, I can't talk against that music." "Come on, let's get out of here, shall we?" "Waiter, check, please." "All right." "I think that will take care of it." "What'd I tell you?" "Best food in town." "Don't misunderstand me, Craven's a nice guy." "Outside of the office you wouldn't know him, but the moment he gets down there he's a bullhead." "Talk, talk, talk, all the time." "Never hears what you have to say." "People like that drive you crazy, don't they?" "Yep." "It kills me." "I've tried to tell him that the first requisite of a modern magazine is to keep up with the times, with the changing customs and speech." "I don't just mean of sophisticated New York." "I mean of the whole country, of every state in the Union, of Maine and Texas and..." "Ohio?" "And Ohio." "Columbus, Ohio?" "Yeah, sure, sure, why not?" "In other words, if you were to read stories written in Columbus, about Columbus, I mean, if you thought they were good stories..." "Why, I'd print them, naturally." "That's just what I'm talking about." "That's what The Manhatter should be like." "Say, aren't you getting tired of this bus?" "Not the bus so much." "Me, too." "Let's get off and walk." "No, I'm not gonna quit." "Anybody can walk out." "That's easy, but I'm going to stay and fight Craven to a finish." "Here, here, wait a second." "I'm not through yet." "Come and sit down." "You see, there's a thrill to this job, if I can do what I want." "Work on stories that are alive, and help authors with talent to dig those stories out." "What do you think?" "I think it's just fine, Mr. Baker, and I also think it's after 3:00." "And if I ever come across the kind of author you're looking for, I'll let you know." "Good night." "Hey, wait a second." "What for?" "I can't even get a word in edgewise." "I can't seem to remind you that I'm an author, and that I have written some stories about Columbus." "Remember?" "Sure, and I read them." "Yeah, and it took till 3:30 in the morning to find out they aren't even worth mentioning." "What are you talking about?" "They're good." "They are?" "Yes." "Well, why didn't you say so?" "Didn't I?" "No." "Well, I'm telling you now." "They're quite good." "Just quite good." "Well, isn't that enough?" "You mean, if you could publish them, you wouldn't?" "No, I wouldn't." "The people come off, but the stories are flat." "They don't get anywhere." "Nothing happens." "That's because not enough happens to you." "It doesn't?" "That's what I said." "Why, you can't lead a quiet, sheltered life..." "Quiet?" "Sheltered?" "Down in that tunnel?" "With subway blasts bouncing me all over the bed, and Appopolous, our Rasputin landlord, and Eileen dragging home newspaper geniuses, and drug-store Romeos and anything else she happens to meet up with during the day, and football players drifting through in their drawers" "and odd callers looking for good old Effie." "Not to mention the rest of the world snooping through the window as though we were some kind of a public exhibition." "Hire a hall!" "Shut up!" "Did you say sheltered?" "That's it, that's exactly the stuff." "Well, go on, write it." "Write what?" "Well, about all those people." "Start your story in Columbus." "Bring it to New York." "Write about Rasputin, Eileen, the blasts, the menagerie." "Gee, it's wonderful." "Why, many an author would give his right hand for material like that." "I see what you mean." "Of course, of course, I'm going to do it." "When can I have it?" "I don't know." "I'm gonna work right now." "You'd better go home before you get killed." "Good night." "Quiet!" "Shut up!" "What do you think this is, Grand Central Station?" "ls that you, Ruth?" "Yes, dear." "What's all that noise out there?" "Nothing, just me." "Well, what time is it?" "3:30." "You were out with a man." "And you've had no experience with men." "lsn't it awful?" "Aren't you ashamed?" "And you were supposed to take care of me." "Eileen, I love New York." "I love everything about it." "I like the air." "I like..." "You must get pretty plastered after a day's ironing." "But I don't touch a drop after the football season starts." "Is that all you do, play football?" "Well, I tried breaking into the wrestling racket, but you've got to rehearse so darn much." "Which way do you want these pleats turned?" "Toward Mecca." "Well, there it is." "All finished." "You know, I got a swell story you ought to write." "How Helen and me met and got married." "I had a job peddling vacuum cleaners, and my first day out, my first client was Helen." "Well, I started to give her a demonstration, and before either one of us realized it, we were in love." "I never did get back to the office." "Well, what happened to the vacuum cleaner?" "It's upstairs." "We still hear from the company." "That'd make a great story, Wreck." "Tell Eileen I've gone up to see Mr. Baker." "I'll be back in a couple of hours." "Okay." "Wreck, you said you'd only be here a couple of nights." "That means you've gotta get out tonight." "Yeah, I know, Ruth, but the old lady didn't arrive on schedule." "Sorry, Wreck, but I need this place to work in." "I'm afraid that's final." "Yeah, but she's liable to blow in any minute." "What are you looking at, you old bezel?" "Well, of course I wrote it in an awful hurry." "There's still lots of things I could do with it." "Nothing that I can see." "Terrible, huh?" "No, it's great." "As far as I'm concerned, it's in the next issue, and Mr. Craven will have read it in a half hour." "You wait here." "You know you're quite a gal." "I like you very much." "He's had it over an hour." "Now, now, don't you worry." "He's a slow reader." "Sit down and relax." "Say, where's that Sherwood contract?" "In a few minutes, Mr, Baker," "Gee, I've never signed a contract before." "He might not like the story." "Come here." "Look, here's the layout of the next issue." "I wanna show you where your story will go." "Wait." "I meant to tell you." "I don't like the title." "I don't like it, either." "Well, we've gotta get another one." "Well, I have thought of some others." "Like what?" "Well, it all seems to hinge on Eileen." "I mean, she's in it so much that I thought of simply calling it..." ""My Sister Eileen."" "Yes, yes, that's it." "Might be good." "It might be perfect." "Let's see what it looks like." ""My Sister..."" "Now." "Sorry to intrude." "lntrude, nothing." "We were waiting for you." "Nice job." "I didn't think Columbus had it in her." "What did I tell you?" "It's a magnificent job." "Yes, she ought to be able to sell that somewhere." "What?" "Why the dickens do you think I asked you to read it?" "Because you want to put it in The Manhatter, but it's not the type of material for our policy." "I thought we settled that." "No, we haven't." "As a matter of fact, you and I are gonna have a showdown on policy right now." "No, please." "Why?" "Because this happens to be Miss Sherwood's story?" "What are you talking about?" "No, because it happens to be the finest thing of its kind I've ever read." "But the wrong kind." "Look, Frank, either that story goes in our next issue, or I quit." "No, that's absurd, Mr. Baker." "Well, I guess I'll have to accept your resignation, Bob." "Good." "But not until that issue is off the press, unless you don't care about another job in the publishing business." "Thanks for letting me see your delightful story, Miss Sherwood." "The Sherwood contract, Mr. Baker." "I don't think we'll need this now." "Wreck, Wreck!" "What's the matter, honey?" "It's Mother." "She saw you." "She said she happened to glance in the window, and a naked man cursed at her." "You mean that old wagon is your mother?" "She'll come down here and accuse the girls, and they're liable to tell her about us." "Not them." "They're too regular." "Especially that Eileen, huh?" "Well, anyhow, I can't stay here anymore." "Ruth told me I had to get out by tonight." "But I'll tackle Eileen." "She's a soft touch." "You stay away from that Eileen." "Well, all right then." "Where do you want me to sleep?" "Well, if we could only scrape up a few dollars, you could stay at the Y until Mother leaves." "Maybe we could hock something." "Yeah, that's an idea." "Wreck, do you think you should?" "Quiet." "They won't lend you a dime on that." "Yeah, but this gold frame might be worth a couple of bucks." "There, the room looks a lot better without it already." "I'll hide it out in the back alley until later." "Wreck, you're so ingenious." "Lucky you." "Hello, Helen." "Where's the Wreck?" "He's around, like always." "Gee, the laundry looks swell." "It was awfully sweet of him." "It was a pleasure, Eileen." "Isn't it too bad the Wreck's leaving today?" "You're gonna miss him." "Yes, we will." "He's certainly a handy man to have around the house." "You don't have to tell me the Wreck's good points." "I suppose I should thank you for giving him back to me at all." "You're crazy, Helen." "Well, I'll be darned." "Why, you ungrateful little..." "Little..." "Snip's the word you're reaching for, darling." "Well, this is the end." "Now, you take that Georgia Peach of yours out of here and don't ever come back." "That's exactly what we'll do." "Come on, Wreck." "You're all wrong, Helen." "Why, if I ever even thought about Eileen in that way, may I be struck dead on this spot." "That was a close call, Wreck." "Helen, are you in there?" "Mother!" "That's the man." "What are you doing associating with these horrible people?" "Well, now, just a minute." "If you dare to address me, I'll call the police." "You get upstairs." "Hello, Helen." "Doesn't anybody knock around here?" "Hello, girls." "I'm Effie." "I dropped in on you the other night, remember?" "Hiya, muscle-bound." "Hey, how are you two lovebirds?" "What?" "What did you say?" "Helen." "No, no, Mother, we're married." "To that?" "See here..." "Shut up." "Upstairs." "I'm gonna wait until Mother's Day and then sock her." "Did I talk out of turn?" "No, no, no, you just added a little pleasant excitement to the day." "Say, have I had any callers since you kids moved in here?" "One or two." "I thought so." "Eileen, will you put the clothes away, dear?" "Yes." "Well, in case they come around, would you mind giving them my new cards?" "Psychic readings, huh?" "You ought to leave some of those at the Russian Blini." "What do you two kids do to earn a living, that is, when you can find it?" "Well, I act, and my sister writes." "When we can find it." "Say, they're crying for your type in musical shows." "I got loads of contacts." "Really?" "That's not my sister's line." "Thanks just the same." "Okay." "Okay." "Well, kids, bonjour," "Sure you left enough cards?" "Temporarily." "So long." "She's really an awfully nice girl." "Yeah, the spiritual type." "Well, what happened today?" "You didn't get into anybody's inside waiting room, did you?" "No, I was at the food show." "What are they casting at the food show?" "Well, I saw a lot of people coming out with big bags of samples, so I thought we might as well have some, too." "We've got enough junk here for a week." "Look!" ""Vita-Kernels." "Zippies."" ""Rough-O."" ""Nature's Broom."" "Gonna have breakfast all day long." "But it's good for you." "It's roughage." "I'd like to vary it with a little smoothage, like a steak." "I forgot." "Frank and I are friends again." "I explained everything." "Who did you tell him Effie was, our fairy godmother?" "Gee, I had a swell lunch." "I had tomato juice, a pimento and olive sandwich, a tuna surprise, a giant double malt with marble cake." "That's right, dear." "Keep your strength up." "You're eating for two now." "Well, it's a funny thing, Ruth." "You don't seem to be losing any weight." "How can I on potatoes, bread and spaghetti?" "I'm starving all day long, and I keep getting fatter." "I think I'll go on a diet of Nature's Broom." ""Delicious with strawberries and cream." What isn't?" "You know, I wouldn't mind this place, or chiseling our meals, or anything, if I only thought it was getting us somewhere." "Ruth, do you think we ought to go home for a little vacation?" "No, I think we ought to stay right here and do a little work." "You remember, darling, if at first you don't succeed, it's simple, you just tackle it again." "You write 50 million words and then 100 million words after that." "Some of them are bound to fall together right, if only by the law of averages." "Well, we certainly could wire Father before starving to death." "No, we can't." "We took an oath on that, remember?" "Now, I want a little quiet around here." "You can start by bolting the front door." "Yes, Ruth." "Congratulate me, young ladies." "Today is the big day." "Tonight my one-man show opens." "I have come to take my..." "What kind of funny game goes on here?" "Where is my painting?" "Didn't you take it?" "I didn't even notice it was gone." "Do not bother to give me a cock-and-bull story." "What have you done with it?" "Why, it must have been stolen." "Maybe it was the same gang that swiped the Mona Lisa," "If you didn't take it, who did?" "You know everybody who comes into this apartment." "We don't even know half of them, including you." "My dear lady, that painting was the last existing canvas of my blue-green period." "What happened to the others?" "Termites?" "That's your last word?" "Termites." "That's all I want to know." "Didn't even notice it was gone." "Ruth, I wonder who could have taken that thing." "There must be an idiot sneak thief in the neighborhood." "Now, Eileen, bolt that back door." "The lock is broken." "What's the matter, Ruth?" "You look terribly down." "Didn't you finish your story?" "Yeah, it's finished." "It was great." "I was famous." "The world was dangling contracts in front of me by the thousands." "We were just rolling in money." "Then Mr. Craven woke me up." "The story was thrown out." "Mr." "Baker fought for it and was fired." "Ruth!" "It's bad enough to feel you can't write your own name, but it's on account of my stuff that Bob Baker's life is turned inside out." "I'm a jinx besides." "Gee, Ruth, if you start feeling that way, who's gonna hold me up?" "I'm not worried about you, Eileen." "Not while there's a man alive." "But after all, men are only an escape." "Comes another escape." "Sherwood residence." "Miss Ruth Sherwood." "For me?" "Who's calling?" "What?" "What?" "Yes, yes, she's here." "Just a minute." "Wait a second." "Ruth, it's Chic Clark's paper." "Hello." "Yes, yes, this is she." "Her." "She." "What?" "Yes, Mr. Bains." "Yes, Mr. Bains." "Thank you, Mr..." "Thank you, Mr. Bains." "Yes." "Yes, of course." "Paper and pencil, quick." "What is it?" "What happened?" "Hurry." "Hurry." "Hurry up." "Yes, yes, I'm ready, Mr. Bains." "Sands." "Sands Street, Brooklyn." "Yes." "Sure." "Sure, I understand." "Yes, right away, Mr. Bains." "I can't believe it." "What is it?" "What did he want?" "They're gonna give me a chance to show what I can do." "I got an assignment over in Brooklyn." "Brooklyn?" "What happened over there?" "A merchant marine, a Portuguese ship with a load of young cadets." "I gotta do a human interest story." "You're not going over there with a run in your stocking." "Come on back and take it off." "This is the pardon from the governor." "We're saved by the bell, Eileen." "I guess Chic Clark was some good after all." "Yeah, I guess I owe Mr. Clark an apology." "Yes." "I always thought he was just trying to get around you." "I still think so." "What do they pay reporters?" "Well, whatever it is, it's more than we're living on now." "Paper." "Oh, dear, the address." "Paper and pen." "Paper and pen." "What happened?" "Pier 67." "Sands Street, Brooklyn." "Bye, Eileen, take care of everything." "Good luck, Ruth." "Eileen." "Well, where is Brooklyn?" "You can't miss it." "That's a help." "Where are you, Eleanor?" "Chic, how did you get in here?" "Your back door lock is busted." "Yes, yes, I know." "You scared me to death." "Take it easy, sugar." "I happened to see Ruth ducking down the subway, and I says, "Maybe Eleanor is alone."" "Yes, she was on her way to Brooklyn." "Chic, I wanna thank you for getting Ruth that assignment with Mr. Bains and everything." "Forget it." "Now, let's get your future straightened out." "Well, I've been waiting for that interview to be published, Chic." "This week, sugar." "Thanks." "Well, you'd better go now." "You'll excuse me, won't you?" "Excuse you?" "After I went and fixed it to get you alone without that eagle-eyed sister of yours around?" "It wasn't the editor." "It was you." "You sent Ruth over to Brooklyn on a wild goose chase." "Wild goose chase nothing." "It was one of the other boys' assignments, and I just switched things around a little." "What kind of a heel do you think I am, sugar?" "But how will the editor ever know that Ruth wrote it?" "Maybe he won't, but it's darn good experience for her." "You ought to be ashamed." "She was so excited." "How am I gonna tell her?" "Now don't get tragic, Eleanor." "You get out of here." "Now, that's a silly attitude to take." "After all I tried to do for that sister of yours." "Go away." "Take your hands off me." "Stop playing coy, sugar." "Stop it, please." "Come in." "Mr. Baker." "And now, Mr. Clark, will you please get out?" "I think I'd do as the lady asks, Mr. Clark." "Sure, it's a little hot for wrestling anyway." "I look forward to the day when the Bronx Express runs right through this room." "Mr." "Baker!" "There, there." "You're all right." "I don't know what I'd have done without you." "Hey, hey, come on." "Come and sit down." "There, that's a girl." "Everything is fine now, isn't it?" "Yes, yes, thank you." "You came to see Ruth, didn't you?" "Yes." "Where is she?" "That Chic Clark sent her on a fake newspaper assignment to Brooklyn, the sneak." "She's really having a bad day, because your sister can write." "I always thought so, but then she thinks I can act." "That's right, too." "Ruth told me you're an actress." "Yes, I want to be, if I can ever get in a producer's office." "Well, that shouldn't be too difficult." "I'll see if I can arrange something." "If you only could, but I wouldn't want you to go to any trouble, Mr. Baker, after you've taken such an interest in Ruth." "Well, let's say I take an interest in the family." "Ruth was right, Mr. Baker." "Why, you're the nicest person I've met in New York, too." "And, you know, the things they say about New York aren't true at all." "Why, everybody has been just lovely to me." "I think I can understand that." "Can you, Bob?" "Sure, sure." "I'm sorry about what happened to you and your job." "Ruth told me all about it." "Yeah, isn't it great?" "Why, I haven't felt so lighthearted since I was a kid." "Do you know what I had in mind when I came calling today?" "A celebration." "You mean with Ruth?" "Yes, but why not with both the Sherwoods?" "Why, a Sherwood sister on each arm would be swell." "What do you say to a theater and a nightclub supper?" "Mr." "Baker!" "Fine." "Well, I'll pick you up at 8:00." "Look, you're sure you're okay?" "I mean, you're not frightened of being left alone?" "No, that won't happen again." "Good. 8:00, then." "Goodbye." "Mr. Appopolous." "I suppose you know absolutely nothing about this pawn ticket and how it was sub-rosa slipped under my door?" "Pawn ticket?" ""One gilt frame. $1.25."" "Yes, for my painting, nothing." "Morons." "Philistines!" "You're absolutely right, Mr. Appopolous, but what does a pawn broker know about art, especially yours?" "That is true." "I am a fool to get excited." "In the whole world, not more than 15 people know what I am trying to say." "And you, my dear Miss Sherwood, are one of them." "Yes, yes, naturally." "You know something?" "As tenant to landlord, we have had our differences, but as person to person, I think we could understand each other." "What?" "You, too?" "Miss Sherwood." "Eileen." "You are a both beautiful and desirable young lady." "From the first night you came here, I admired you, not only for your charming build and wholesome personality..." "Yeah, well, we'll talk it over sometime." "Women have never played a disturbing role in my life." "I am creative enough without women." "I can express myself." "Please, Miss Sherwood, stand still while I am talking to you." "Mr. Appopolous, I must ask you to leave." "Leave at a time like this?" "This is against the law." "You've got to leave when another person tells you to." "There is a higher law, the law of the jungle." "You struck me!" "You bet I struck you, and if you don't get out of here, I'm gonna call the police." "I assure you, my dear young lady, that will not be necessary." "I should have known better." "Life is for idiots." "A man like me in this position, believe me, the gods must be laughing, indeed." "Eileen!" "Eileen!" "What's the matter?" "The fleet is in." "Well, for heaven's sake." "How do you do, gentlemen?" "Listen, Emily Post, how do you say," ""Get the dickens out of here," in Portuguese?" "You mean they don't speak any English at all?" "Not a word." "Go." "Leave." "Goodbye." "What did you bring them here for?" "Bring them?" "They've been on my tail ever since I left the Brooklyn docks." "There were half a dozen more of them when we started, but they got lost in the subway." "What do they want anyway?" "What do you think they want?" "We've gotta get them out of here." "Suppose you take a crack at it." "Go away." "Go away, boys, please." "Look, boys, go back to your boat." "You know, boat." "Admiral Sherwood, I presume." "What are we going to do?" "Well, I guess we're gonna just stand here grinning at each other until they learn to speak English." "Look, boys, I have a date." "You know, eat." "Eat." "Don't do that." "They think you're asking them to stay to dinner." "Sick, sick, very sick, very sick." "What are they tossing for?" "I got a hunch it's not me." "No, I don't know what you want." "Earthquake, earthquake!" "Run for your lives!" "What a performance." "Bernhardt couldn't have done better." "Well, stop grinning at me like that." "Ruth, Ruth!" "I don't even do the rumba." "Ruth!" "Ruth!" "Ruth!" "Cut it out, will you?" "Take it easy, will you?" "Ruth!" "Eileen!" "Hey, Eileen!" "Eileen, I got an idea." "Lead them out the back door, then run like mad for the front, and I'll slip you in." "Come on." "You lead them and I'll let you slip in." "They won't follow me." "It's you they want." "Come on." "You'd better be there." "What are you doing?" "Get rid of them." "I got the door fixed." "All right." "Hey, wait a minute." "Stop!" "You're breaking the law!" "But, Sergeant, that's just an innocent girl from Columbus, Ohio." "She's never seen a jail in her life." "This will positively kill her." "Why don't you put me in there?" "I started the whole thing." "She was leading the riot." "Yes, I know, but let me see her, will you, please?" "She must be scared to death in there." "She must be half out of her mind." "Okay, Ed." "Thank you." "Come on now, Eileen, open your mouth." "Don't you do it, Eileen." "Don't say a word till we get a lawyer." "Why, Ruth." "Hello." "What are they doing to you, darling?" "Feeding me ice cream." "Isn't that nice of the boys?" "Boys, meet my sister, Ruth." "Ruth this is Mr. Murphy, Mr. Jackson, Mr. Griswald." "Hiya, Ruth." "Hiya, Ruth." "Have some ice cream?" "No." "No, thank you." "Say, Murphy, could I step in the corridor?" "Why, certainly." "Give me the keys, Murph." "Yeah, where are the keys?" "Go way." "Go way." "Hold this." "There we are." "You know, Ruth, policemen aren't frightening at all." "In fact, they're just about the nicest men I ever met." "Eileen, you're sure you're all right?" "All right?" "Well, of course." "Ruth, isn't it fascinating?" "Just think, Eileen Sherwood in jail." "I was just telling the boys..." "You know, for an actress, this is very valuable experience." "Of course, we didn't have enough experience." "Ruth." "Mr." "Baker." "Bob, it was terribly nice of you to come." "Not at all." "Came as fast as I could, Ruth." "Why, I didn't know you knew Eileen." "Well, he certainly does." "We had a delightful talk this afternoon." "Yes." "We were all going out to dinner, you know." "Bob, I want you to meet the boys." "Come on." "Bob, this is Mr. Murphy, Mr. Griswald and Mr. Jackson." "Hiya." "Hi." "Hello, boys." "Look, Eileen, I don't want you to worry, but I'm afraid the news is not too good." "I did some phoning about this, and it seems there are peculiar ramifications." "What kind of ramifications?" "Well, it seems that Washington wants Eileen held." "Washington?" "DC?" "Yes, something about foreign relations, the Portuguese merchant marine." "Oh, my gosh." "What if Dad hears about this?" "We've got to get a lawyer." "No, it's only a technicality." "I'm sure they'll iron it out in a few hours, but I'm afraid Eileen has to spend the night in jail." "The night?" "Well, what do you know?" "That's terrific." "That's fine." "No, she can't do that." "Darling, this is horrible for you." "Well, now, Ruth, if I have to, I have to." "Don't worry, Ruth, we'll get her out of here first thing in the morning." "Sure, everything is gonna be fine." "We'll take care of her." "Now, darling, I'm going to be nice and comfortable here." "You run along." "And thank you, Bob, for everything you've done." "I will see you in the morning, won't I?" "Yes, yes, of course." "Good night, Ruth, dear." "Good night, darling." "Well, boys, you can lock me up now." "Come on, Ruth." "We better go." "Ruth, I'm sorry I can't see you home, but I got something very important to do at the office." "Here, you take my cab." "I'll tell you all about it tomorrow." "Well, thank you and good night." "233 Barrow Street." "Good night." "Don't you worry now." "I won't." "I am a fool, Jenson, a fool." "Yes, Mr. Appopolous." "That is my last exhibit." "Imagine, nobody came, even with a sign in the window, "Free ice tea."" "A hundred years from now, the world will catch up with me." "Yes, Mr. Appopolous." "See if you can fix the back door lock." "Yes, Mr. Appopolous." "So you finally returned to the scene of your crime." "Don't you start, Appopolous." "I'm in no mood to swap subtleties with you." "Not so high and haughty, my dear young lady." "I've rented this apartment for 12 years to a lot of peculiar tenants, but none of them ever started a riot with the whole European continent before." "Please, I'm tired." "Arrests, jails." "I only hope your sister had sense enough to give the wrong address." "Yeah, imagine what bad publicity could do to this rat hole." "What's that?" "I am fixing the back door lock for the next tenant." "Well, that's fine." "It makes this studio a dead-end street." "Well, listen, I don't hold grudges." "If you got some money, and you want to stay on here, I'm ready to talk business." "You are?" "All right, how about returning our month's rent?" "We're still dissatisfied." "What are you talking about?" "Whoever said such a thing?" "I was one of the witnesses, and I don't remember." "Okay, witness, blow." "Me?" "Blow?" "In my own building?" "Yeah, blow in your own building." "Very well, I will blow, but 5:00 tomorrow when your current lease expires," "I am blowing back again." "Your slip is showing." "Yeah, this is the place, Mother." "What the..." "Take it off, please." "Grandma." "Dad." "Dad, darling." "Ruth." "Well, why didn't you let us know you were coming?" "What are you doing here anyway?" "Well, I tried to get this man to stay at home and mind his own business, but he had to come." "He's been worrying like a fool." "Worried?" "Worried about what, Dad?" "You know your father." "ls this where you live?" "What's wrong with it?" "It's lovely, isn't it, Grandma?" "Yes." "The atmosphere in Greenwich Village..." "You have no idea." "Where's Eileen?" "Eileen?" "Out for the day already." "Eileen, at 10:00, out for the day?" "Doing what?" "Did you ever see such a clucking old mother hen as he is?" "Now, what is she doing?" "Well, you know, she..." "Nothing." "I meant that she's, you know, keeping up friendships and making contacts, and..." "Where is..." "Thank you." "Ruth!" "Gee, Dad, you look great." "Why is it you never wrote about anything definite?" "Well, you see, darling, it takes time." "I've sent in a lot of material, one story in particular." "I feel sure they'll publish it." "But what about money?" "Have you earned any?" "Why, if not, you can't have a cent left." "Sure." "Hello there." "Good morning, Officer." "Nice and quiet around here today so far." "Officer, this is my father." "Well, thanks very much for looking in." "Don't mention it." "So long, Daddy." "What's all this about?" "Hiya, Ruth." "Wreck, couldn't you come back later?" "There ain't going to be no later." "Helen and I are just leaving on our honeymoon." "Honeymoon?" "Mother said her daughter couldn't get married without her being present, so we had to be married all over again." "Yeah, we were in kind of a tough spot." "I had to kick out behind my own goal post." "Well, so long, baby." "We'll be seeing you." "Come on, sugar foot." "Ruth, I want you to know how sorry I am for the way I acted." "That's all right." "Run right along." "Have a good time." "I mean for all the things I said while the Wreck was living down here." "Living down where?" "Down here." "Well, here goes the bridal bouquet." "Who's gonna be next?" "April fool." "Hey, Ruth, bring your pals up later for a couple of snorts." "There may be some people dropping in here." "It looked like some kind of a parade." "Well, they're people we met yesterday under rather unusual circumstances." "Dad, Grandma!" "Eileen, how did..." "What happened?" "May I present Captain Amadato of the Portuguese merchant marine and his cadets?" "I am honored." "I have come to right a most disastrous wrong." "What?" "That's quite all right." "Don't mention it." "They say they are grossly sorry." "As for myself, I will take up at once with the merchant marine the question of reparation." "Reparations?" "We wouldn't think of it." "Thanks." "But she has spent the night in jail." "Jail?" "What?" "And now, in grateful token," "I present to you the ribbon of the Society of Mariners, second class." "I wonder what you have to go through to get first class." "I beg your pardon, is it here that these careless boys have lost their hats?" "This is the place." "Six caps coming up." "For the merchant marine from your good neighbors in Greenwich Village." "Thank you." "Hello!" "Dad, you'll just die laughing when you hear what this is all about." "Yes, I'm sure he will." "Now, Walter, Walter, get hold of yourself." "Dad, it isn't as bad as it sounds, honestly." "Don't bother, Ruth." "You girls are coming home with me tonight." "Home?" "I can explain the whole thing." "You can make your explanations on the way back to Columbus." "I'm going to get the bus tickets." "Dad." "I'll be right back, and I want you to be ready to go." "Walter, it's well known you're a dodo." "Mother, I've heard the last from you or any of you, and so you don't stay here and make trouble, you're coming along with me." "Why, Walter, I'm your mother." "Let go of me." "Walter, you're just an old dodo." "Well, there you are." "Old dodo." "Well, we might as well start packing." "Dad will be here any minute." "I'm not going back." "You're not?" "It isn't fair, not when things are just beginning to happen." "You're right, Ruth." "Why, I just started to know people." "I'd have had a job in a week." "Well, two weeks at the most." "Why, I began to feel I could really write." "It's true, the darn stuff didn't click, but for the first time, I was sure I could fight it through." "I felt strong and confident." "Ruth, I want a career." "I may never feel this way again as long as I live." "And if we go back to Columbus, what will people say?" "I'll tell you what they'll say." "They'll say, "Did you hear the dirt about the Sherwood girls?" ""On account of them, we nearly had international complications."" "It's awful." "Ghastly!" "No!" "We won't go back." "We'll stay right here and fight it out." "Won't we, Ruth?" "Let's start packing, Eileen." "Packing?" "Well, didn't you just say that you felt strong and confident?" "Yes, yes, I said it, but what's the use?" "We were licked before we started." "Well, what did you have to get me all worked up for?" "I had to get it off my chest, didn't I?" "Well, it's horrible." "That's what it is, just horrible." "And after meeting the nicest person we've ever met in our lives, and the first person who really seemed to care what happened to my career." "Mr." "Baker?" "Yes, Bob Baker." "Now, how am I going to call him up and say, "Father is bundling me off home"?" "Well, it really doesn't make any difference, Eileen." "We didn't get to know him too well." "What?" "I said..." "I said, we've got to go home, so it doesn't matter now." "Why, Ruth, I never dreamed." "You like him, too." "Strange as it may seem." "Why, I never had any idea." "And me, that's had no experience with men." "That's bad, isn't it?" "It's ridiculous." "I'm just a goop." "Eileen, start packing." "Dad said he'd be back any minute." "Now, there, you see?" "Yes?" "Hello, Bob." "Hello, Sherwoods." "Packing?" "Why, what does this mean?" "We're going home." "Yes, Father came." "He wants us to go back for a little while." "Yes, but wait a minute." "When are you coming back?" "I don't think we'll ever be back." "We're going home because we're a couple of flat-broke failures." "Ruth." "As a matter of fact, if Dad hadn't shown up," "I guess we'd have had to thumb our way back to Columbus." "Now, that can't be true." "Oh, no?" "I've got 3 extra pounds to prove it from eating potatoes and spaghetti." "We can't even buy that much now." "Well, you can buy a lot of spaghetti for $250." "This check seems to be yours." "It has your name on it." "$250." "It's much too early in life to begin accepting charity, Mr. Baker." "We won't take it." "That's all there is to it." "Thank you very much." "I get it." "You're gonna read page 15 of this new issue of The Manhatter, and you're gonna hold us up?" "I suppose you're going to sue us for almost $1 million." "Page 15?" "What's on it?" ""'My Sister Eileen,' by Ruth Sherwood." "My Sister..." Why, that's me." "That's me!" "Very clever, Miss Sherwood." "Very clever." "This was printed without your permission, so you've got me over a barrel." "Well, come on, what'll you settle for, 1,000, 10,000, half a million?" "Why, Ruth, that's your story." "That's your money." "No, Bob, we wouldn't sue." "Why, $250 is just fine." "Well, how did it happen?" "How do you think it happened?" "And if you want to know, several people have already phoned me to say that they consider this is the best human interest story of the year." "Bob, and it's all about me." "You are, by far and away, the best thing in it." "I hope you don't mind, Eileen." "Mind?" "Why, I'm famous." "Now, come on, are you going to accept this check," "or am I going to have trouble with you?" "We'll accept it." "Where the dickens is 233 Barrow Street?" "How do you get into the place?" "That sounds like Mr. Craven." "Here we go." "Where does that Sherwood girl live around here anyway?" "Why, Mr. Craven." "What?" "What do you want?" "There you are." "Who put this story in?" "You?" "Yes." "What about it?" "I wanna talk to you, and to you, Miss Columbus." "I'll be right down." "How do I get into the place?" "You stay where you are." "The lady doesn't want to see you." "I'll be right up." "Pardon me." "Pardon me." "My dear young ladies, Jenson just told me the sensational news." "I will not hear of your leaving." "Why, I'm sure we can reach an understanding." "I'm sure you think so now, Mr. Appopolous." "But in the future, we certainly won't be living in a place where there are explosions under the beds." "But wait." "The blasting is over." "I just got a letter from the city." "Dreadfully sorry, Mr. Appopolous, but somewhere uptown." "A penthouse, perhaps." "Eileen, wait a minute." "What on earth are you talking about?" "Well, darling, we're certainly not gonna go back home now." "Well, I guess we aren't, but what's all this uptown talk about?" "What do you think we're going to do?" "Spend a check for a month's rent on a penthouse and then sit around on a bare floor and starve?" "Exactly." "Who asked you?" "Eileen, we've got to be sensible, dear." "By all means." "Did you say the blasting is really over?" "ln black and white." ""Please note, blasting will terminate on September the first." Today." "And you're fixing this place up?" "New furniture, new paint, A-1 stoves and plumbings, Venetian blinds!" "Venetian blinds." "Why, Ruth, that sounds wonderful." "And you know, this place has been awfully lucky." "Yes, dear, I know, but let's talk it over with Mr. Baker." "He'll be right back." "And, listen, rent is reduced to $30 a month." "Ruth, did you hear that?" "$30?" "But at that figure, my dear ladies, it must be a six-month lease." "On a completely friendly basis." "I think we ought to do it." "Certainly you ought to do it." "How do you know he's gonna do what he says?" "It's in the lease." "There, you see?" "Please, Ruth." "He can't back out." "We've got him where we want him." "Absolutely." "I'm trapped." "Well..." "Congratulations, young lady." "You have made a very wise decision." "Aren't you ready yet, girls?" "The bus leaves in 40 minutes." "Dad, we're not going." "What?" "It's true." "Ruth sold a story." "Look, we're famous, both of us." "I don't believe it." "Congratulations, Mr. Sherwood." "You have a pair of brilliant daughters." "I am proud to have them as tenants for the next six months." "Six months?" "Here?" "What does this mean?" "It's all settled, Dad." "We've just signed the lease." "Yes, thank you." "Goodbye, everybody." "Oh, my goodness!" "What's that?" "I told you the blasting is over." "Now, they are starting to drill." "Goodbye." "You cheat." "Now, I'm convinced." "You girls have gone crazy." "That settles it." "You're coming right back to Columbus." "Who's going back to Columbus?" "Not Ruth Sherwood." "What's that?" "Ruth, since this morning, Mr. Craven has decided that there is room in his publication for some human material, and I have a contract here for all the future Eileen stories you'll ever write." "Ruth!" "And believe me, Mr. Craven, the Eileen stories will go on forever." "Why, I've got loads of material." "I'll guarantee that." "And who are you?" "Why, I'm My Sister Eileen." "Why, Grandma." "I'd have known you anywhere." "I'm very glad to see you." "Thank you." "And this must be Mr. Sherwood." "It's a great pleasure, sir." "Now, see here, what's happening here?" "Look, I've made up mind." "No, no, sir, you can't take Ruth back to Columbus now." "Why, don't you see?" "She and I have a lot of work to do together." "It may take years, maybe even a lifetime to finish." "I wonder if you understand, Mr. Sherwood." "A lifetime." "It's getting pretty clear to me." "Well, in any case, certainly Eileen is coming home." "No, no, Dad, she isn't." "If I stay, Eileen stays, too." "She has a career, you know." "In fact, Mr. Craven must know a lot of people in the theatrical world." "Of course he does." "Well then, if he'll help Eileen get a start, I may sign this contract very soon." "I don't see why not." "It's obvious the young lady has extraordinary talent." "Why, Mr. Craven, you're the nicest man I ever met." "Well, this makes it just perfect." "We ought to celebrate." "Will you all be my guests for dinner?" "Now you're talking, young man." "But no spaghetti." "Positively not." "Hold on, Mother, not so fast." "Walter, be still." "Come on, let's go." "Well, I'll take Mr. Craven." "And you've got me, Walter." "And I'll take Ruth." "Eileen." "Hey, Moe, I think I made the wrong turn."