"CYRIL:" "Andso ,if Icould direct your attention to these visual aids... you will see that from our initial supply of 1,000 kilos of cocaine, we..." "ARCHER:" "Hangon ,dummy,we had a ton of cocaine." "CYRIL:" "No,we ..." "Well,wehad a tonne, T-O-N-N-E, also known as a metric ton, but..." "MALORY:( scoffs)Metric." "Who uses metric?" "LANA:" "Everysinglecountryon the planet except for us," "Liberia and Burma." "ARCHER:" "Wow,really?" "ARCHER:' Causeyounever think of those other two as having their shit together." "CYRIL:" "Anyway,as youcan  see..." "MALORY:" "Whyarethey thermometers?" "PAM:" "I thoughttheywere" "ARCHER:" "Wait,they'renot ?" "CYRIL:" "No...they...are ... not... cocks!" "RON:" "Okay!" "Jesus,you people." "Next time, remind me to get shot in the head." "ARCHER:" "Uh,Ron,nexttime , get shot in the head." "MALORY:" "Sterling,shutup." "Cyril, continue." "CYRIL( sighs):" "So,as youcan  see, we are already down to 125 kilos of cocaine, which was worth about $6 million, so..." "ARCHER:" "And,wait,how much is that in pounds?" "CYRIL:" "Forgetpounds!" "We're doing kilos!" "ARCHER:" "No,Imeantpounds..." "MALORY:" "Sterling!" "ARCHER:" "Exactly." "As in Doctor Who money." "MALORY:" "Howdo youstand there and crack wise when this is all your fault?" "ARCHER:" "Myfault?" "I only lost 44.092 pounds of it, mother." "It's Pam's fault we had to give the Yakuza 100 kilos." "And this other five-- spoiler alert-- she ate!" "LANA:" "Yeah,andwouldnowbe a good time to talk about Pam's cocaine addiction?" "PAM:" "Ortheinspiringstory of her heroic struggle to finally triumph over it?" "LANA:" "Whatareyou eating?" "PAM( mouthfull):" "Yogurt!" "(grunting)" "MALORY:" "Giveme that!" "PAM:" "Hey!" "MALORY:" "Lickit ." "ARCHER:( groans)Well,can't unhear that." "Holy shit, yogurt is amazing!" "Why have I never tried yogurt?" "!" "LANA:" "Howhaveyou never tried yogurt?" "ARCHER:" "Mmm,Ididn'tknow it was that good." "MALORY:" "It'sgoodbecause it's cocaine!" "ARCHER( gasps):" "Oh,my God." "And little kids eat it?" "MALORY:" "Cyril,yousaidit was locked up." "CYRIL:" "Itis ." "In the cage in the pantry." "MALORY:" "Thenhowdid she get  it?" "(Pam whistling)" "That is it!" "You're going to rehab." "PAM:" "What?" "!" "No ,Ican 't!" "And you can't make me!" "ARCHER:" "Yeah,is thateven necessary?" "I think she's in a pretty good place." "MALORY:" "She'sgoingand  that's final, and..." "PAM:" "I swearto God,ifyou send me to freakin' rehab, I'll go right to the cops!" "LANA:" "What?" "!" "ARCHER:" "Oh,comeon." "MALORY:" "Youwouldn'tdare." "PAM( laughing):" "Oh,yeah?" "!" "Just try... (clang)" "LANA:" "Goddamn,Woodhouse." "WOODHOUSE:" "Onlythingfor a grass, mum." "And, sir, I'm afraid your breakfast will be four minutes late." "ARCHER( groans):" "Typical." "ARCHER:" "Whatareyou doing?" "Come on." "Tighter." "LANA:" "Oh,forthe ..." "That's tight enough-- we're not making tit bondage porn." "ARCHER:" "That'sathing?" "CYRIL:" "Oh,yeah." "(Malory groans)" "ARCHER:" "Ditto." "I just don't want her to escape." "You know how strong she is." "Might as well be green and half-deaf." "LANA:" "Whatif we movethe  coke and lock her in the cage till she's clean?" "ARCHER:" "Hey,yeah,sweatit out, like Popeye Doyle." "How long would that take?" "LANA:" "I don'tknow." "Couple of weeks?" "MALORY:" "Trycoupleofnever." "This is Pam we're talking about, the poster child for addictive personality." "What is wrong with you?" "ARCHER( crying):" "I learnedit  by watching you." "Oh, my God." "LANA:" "Yeah,spoileralert." "So, what do you suggest we do?" "MALORY( gasps):" "Wethrowher  a party." "With an enormous cake!" "Cyril, can we spare another five pounds of cocaine?" "LANA:" "Malory!" "MALORY:2.27kilograms,then!" "Who are you, Thomas Corwin" "Mendenhall?" "ARCHER:" "Right?" "LANA:" "We'renotkillingPam!" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Wait,what?" "RON:" "Jesus." "Oh ,comeonin." "Make some more noise." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Just'cause now you're the fat one?" "LANA:" "Um,Isaidwewerenot killing her." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Oh." "LANA:" "And,also,thisisa baby." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Ew!" "LANA:" "A baby,by theway , that I did not eat but to which" "I will give birth." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Ew!" "ARCHER( chuckles):" "Right?" "MALORY:" "Well,if shewon 'tgo to rehab and you won't let her die with dignity..." "LANA:" "Froman overdoseof cocaine cake?" "!" "MALORY:" "Oh,please." "Change the word "cocaine" to" ""Cookie Puss" and that's how her obituary was going to read anyway." "LANA:" "Whatthe..." "KRIEGER:" "I mayhaveasimply elegant solution." "LANA:" "Krieger." "KRIEGER:" "Right?" "This place is like a Habitrail-- there are secret passages everywhere." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "I thinkthat's why the colored maids never felt safe." "They'd be polishing a spittoon or whatever and suddenly..." "Grandpa." "(others gasp)" "Yeah." "And dressed up like a ghost?" "LANA:" "Whatis it withyour family wearing ghost costumes to scare black people?" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Whatis it with you people making tit bondage pornos in my ancestral home?" "!" "KRIEGER:" "Ah,einige" "Tittenfreude, huh?" "CYRIL:" "Ooh,ja ." "MALORY:" "Sowhat'sall this about a solution?" "KRIEGER:" "Aha!" "Yes." "And what is on my finger, you ask?" "LANA:" "I promiseyounooneis asking that." "KRIEGER:" "Well,theyshould because this nearly microscopic, wittle-bitty guy is my new and improved mind control chip." "ARCHER:" "Improved?" "On the one that made Len Trexler think he was a giant lettuce?" "MALORY( gasps):" "Len" "Trexler..." "RON:" "WhothehellisLen" "Trexler?" "MALORY:" "Neverheardofhim." "KRIEGER:" "It'swayimproved, and look how tiny." "I don't even need a drill" " I can inject it right through the temple." "PAM:" "Wait,whatare wedoing?" "ARCHER:" "Stabbingscienceinto your brain." "PAM:" "What?" "!" "MALORY:" "It'sforyourown good, dear." "ARCHER:" "Yeah,so youdon 't wind up giving blow jobs in a bus station toilet." "But for cocaine." "PAM:" "No!" "Letmego!" "(growling)" "MALORY:" "Krieger,do youthink a chip could cure someone of stage fright?" "CHERYL/CAROL( gasps):" "Noway!" "MALORY:" "Butyoucouldbe" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "I couldbe" "MALORY:" "Now,youlistento me, missy." "You are getting a brain chip, and then you're going on the" "Grand Old Opera, and I don't care if it kills you be... (screams)" "(Pam roars)" "LANA:" "Pam,honey,justcalm  down!" "(Pam growls)" "MALORY:" "Somebodydo  something!" "CYRIL:" "Nobodydo anything!" "ARCHER:" "Lana... (Pam growls)" "Lana!" "LANA:" "Krieger!" "KRIEGER:" "Yeah,I'monit." "MALORY:" "Ow!" "Idiot." "(Cheryl/Carol screams)" "(Pam growls)" "LANA:" "Pam!" "ARCHER:" "Lana...!" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Thisis only somewhat like that old Gypsy woman said...!" "ARCHER:" "Lana." "LANA:" "What?" "!" "God shit damn it, Archer, what?" "!" "ARCHER:" "Um,nevermind." "LANA:" "Archer,Is ..." "ARCHER:" "Thelastthingyou need right now is a big, shit-eating "I told you so."" "(Lana groans)" "MALORY:" "Butit 'sexactlywhat you deserve." "And, Krieger, I hope you have a lot more where this came from because..." "LANA:" "Super." "Hunting women to force them to have surgery against their will." "MALORY:" "It'sforPam 'sown  good." "She'll die if she doesn't quit eating cocaine." "LANA:" "Andwho'sgonnadieif you don't get rich managing" "Cheryl's singing career?" "MALORY:" "Maybeyou." "Now, get out there and have some fun!" "ARCHER:" "Howcouldwenot?" "(Woodhouse clears throat)" "Woodhouse, I swear to God, if you tell me lunch is four minutes late..." "WOODHOUSE:" "No,sir." "There's a Mr. Holly here." "Sorry, an Agent Holly." "From the FBI." "(others gasp, groan)" "ARCHER:" "Butlunchisstill a firm twelve." "(chuckles)" "Firm twelve." "You know, as in inches?" "Jesus, .3048 meters." "Hi." "Welcome to Nazi Canada!" "(gagging sounds)" "Eh?" "MALORY:" "Whyis theFBI here?" "CYRIL:" "Didhe showyou a warrant?" "WOODHOUSE:" "No,sir,he..." "CYRIL:" "Thentellhim togo piss off-- he can't come inside without a warrant." "WOODHOUSE:" "He..." "CYRIL:" "Well,unlessyou  invite him in." "ARCHER( groans):" "He'snota vampire, idiot." "ARCHER:" "Plusit 'sdaytime." "CYRIL:" "Ifinvitedin, law  enforcement can enter your home without a warrant." "Once inside, under the doctrine of "plain view," anything illegal-- say, a truckload of cocaine in the kitchen-- can be lawfully seized as evidence." "They can also enter a private residence under any number of exigent circumstances, like providing emergency assistance to an occupant, say, if they heard someone screaming... (Malory screams)" "(others gasp)" "HOLLY:" "Goodmorning." "CYRIL:" "No,sir,goodday." "I insist that you leave immediately, as you have entered this residence unlawfully." "HOLLY:" "Uh,youwanttojump in here, Yoda's dad?" "WOODHOUSE:" "I invitedhimin." "MALORY:" "Woodhouse!" "HOLLY:" "Andonceyou dothat , you know, we are in." "Not unlike vampires." "ARCHER:" "See?" "MALORY:" "Bethatasitmay, why are you here?" "HOLLY:" "Oh,justcheckingin, making sure you folks aren't engaging in treason, espionage or anything else illegal." "MALORY:" "Well,Ican assure you..." "HOLLY:" "Likedrugs." "MALORY:" "Hmm?" "HOLLY:" "Cocaine?" "MALORY:" "Nope." "HOLLY:" "Yakuza?" "MALORY:" "Mm-mm." "HOLLY:" "Shootout?" "HOLLY:" "Nooneherewasshot" "MALORY( chuckling):" "Well,I think we'd remember that." "HOLLY:" "Thenwhat'shis  problem?" "LANA:" "Vasectomy." "CYRIL:" "Piles." "ARCHER:" "Gout." "CYRIL:" "Mumps." "KRIEGER:" "Progeria!" "(sniffles)" "He's just a little boy." "CYRIL:" "Butwhateveriswrong with him..." "ARCHER:" "Goutmumps." "CYRIL:...isnoneofyour  business, and since nothing in plain view would lead a reasonable person to suspect illegal activity, I demand that you... (Gillette screams)" "HOLLY:" "Nobodymove!" "MALORY:" "Well?" "!" "CYRIL( sighs):" "Theycanalso do what's known as a..." "HOLLY:" "Protectivesweep...!" "CYRIL:" "Caselawregarding search-and-seizure is actually quite interesting..." "MALORY:" "What...about...the  cocaine?" "(Cyril speaking indistinctly)" "CYRIL:...admissibleas  evidence but only if he sees it." "MALORY:" "Sowe haveto keep him out of the kitchen." "All right, fan out!" "Agent Holly is the prime target, but..." "LANA:" "So,justsowe're clear, you want us to tranquilize a federal agent." "MALORY:" "Doyouhaveabetter idea?" "LANA:" "I donot." "MALORY:" "Thenwe justslap some panties and rouge on him, pose him with Gillette-- whose fault this is!" " make some glossy 8x10s..." "KRIEGER:" "I 'lldoit !" "I have a camera!" "Dibs!" "MALORY:" "AndthenIdoubt we'll be hearing from Agent" "Holly in the future." "CYRIL:" "Oryoucouldpose him with Woodhouse." "WOODHOUSE:" "What?" "KRIEGER( chuckles):" "God knows he's a little GILF." "(others groan)" "ARCHER:" "That'sathing?" "!" "CYRIL:" "Howdo younot know the different kinds of porn?" "ARCHER:" "BecauseIhavesex with actual women, Cyril!" "My girlfriend's not equal parts the Internet, a tube of Kentucky jelly, self-loathing and a sock!" "MALORY:" "Tellthattoyour  cellmate!" "Now, go!" "GILLETTE( slurred):" "You scared the shit out of me!" "CHERYL/CAROL( groans):" "What, literally?" "PAM:" "Seriously,dude,whatis up with you?" "GILLETTE( sniffles):" "I could walk, and now I can't, and ain't nobody loves ol' Ray no more." "(crying)" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Well,yeah, you're disgusting." "But, you, I am totally digging this whole Queen Kong vibe." "(Pam growls)" "(Gillette sobbing)" "HOLLY:" "MyGod,are they... torturing a woman?" "Hang on, ma'am!" "I'm a federal agent, and I'm coming!" "By God, I am coming!" "LANA:" "Okay,youthreehead  upstairs..." "ARCHER:" "Hangon ." "LANA:" "I 'mgoingto the kitchen to make sure he doesn't stumble onto the coke." "ARCHER:" "Hangon ." "LANA:" "What?" "ARCHER:" "Question." "LANA:" "What?" "ARCHER:" "Arewe notsaying" ""phrasing" anymore?" "Which, that's fine, whatever, but if we're doing a new thing and nobody told me-- that I'd have a problem with." "HOLLY:" "Oh,screwme!" "ARCHER:" "SaidRipleytothe android Bishop." "Wait, hang on." "Um..." "Goddamn it!" "What was wrong with "phrasing"?" "!" "GILLETTE:" "Nothing!" "I'm fine." "Just get out, leave me alone!" "HOLLY:" "I justneedtobesure you're not being held here against your..." "That is a federal offense!" "GILLETTE:" "I said,getout ...!" "KRIEGER:" "Oh,hey,remindme to reboot the CPU in Ray's spine so he can walk again." "CYRIL:" "What?" "A reboot-- that's all it takes?" "!" "KRIEGER:" "Beepboop." "CYRIL:" "He'sbeenparalyzed for months." "What the hell have you been waiting for?" "!" "KRIEGER:" "Yeah,butthinkhow much happier he'll be now." "LANA:" "Or--andI'm just spitballing' here" " I find Holly first, show him the coke, get immunity, testify against them, then you and I go into witness protection and spend the rest of our miserable lives on the run, hounded by the fact that we" "betrayed our friends." "Ugh!" "Or I get arrested and give birth in a supermax prison and..." "Oh, wait." "Does the baby grow up in prison, or...?" "WOODHOUSE:" "Oh." "Hello, old friend." "LANA:" "Whattheshit,Archer?" "!" "ARCHER:" "Hangon ." "I knew you'd shoot without looking." "LANA:" "Oh,really,you knowme that well?" "!" "ARCHER:" "Uh,wellenoughto know you're down here wondering if witness protection ever sends people to the Virgin Islands." "LANA:" "Well,in caseyou 'd forgotten, I have an unborn child to think about!" "ARCHER:" "JesusChrist,Lana, who can forget?" "It's baby this, baby that." "LANA:" "Aw,BabyArcher,who's a jeawous baby?" "ARCHER:" "What?" "!" "Holy shit, do you have anemia?" "LANA:" "No,I..." "ARCHER:" "Uh,edema, hypertension, preeclampsia," "Braxton-Hicks contractions, pica?" "!" "LANA:" "I ..." "ARCHER:" "GERD?" "!" "Lana, do you have GERD?" "!" "(Lana clears her throat)" "LANA:" "Howdo youknowabout the various possible complications of pregnancy?" "Archer?" "ARCHER:" "MaybeIlookeditup ." "LANA:" "Why?" "ARCHER:" "I wasconcernedabout you." "Blow me!" "LANA:" "Justmakingsureyou're not into preggo porn." "ARCHER:" "Oh,goddamnit!" "That can't be a thing!" "LANA:" "Itis absolutelya thing, and do you just not have the Internet, or...?" "ARCHER:" "I haveMinitel,okay?" "LANA:" "A :nottheInternet," "B: only works in..." "ARCHER:" "France,Lana." "Oui, maintenant je sais!" "LANA:" "Okay,um ,thanksfor  your concern, and I don't know what you think you heard about witness protection, but..." "ARCHER:" "Theydon'tmake babies grow up in prison, Lana." "LANA:" "Yeah,right?" "ARCHER:" "Theytakethemaway  the minute they're born and send them to an orphanage." "LANA:" "No,notthe minute they're..." "ARCHER:" "Thatveryminute," "Lana!" "They don't even dry them off!" "(Lana cries)" "So if I were you, I'd run out that door while I still had a chance." "LANA:" "But-but,Archer,I..." "ARCHER:" "I 'dalsowastefive precious minutes of my head start in the race to freedom giving that swell guy Archer a combination good-bye/thank-you blow job." "(Lana cries)" "(Lana laughs)" "LANA:" "Asshole." "ARCHER:" "Yeah,or arim job ." "What do you care?" "You're never gonna see him again." "LANA:" "I can't." "ARCHER:" "I know." "I was kidding, stupid." "LANA:" "I meanIcan 'tleave you, stupid!" "(loud knocking)" "HOLLY:" "Thisis theFBI !" "Open this door!" "ARCHER:" "Well,notnow ... stupid." "And so, wait." "Where did we land on that blow job?" "Sorry, rim job." "HOLLY:" "Doyouhearme?" "!" "Open this door!" "Obstructing... a federal agent... is a felony... punishable..." "Ow!" "...by up to 20 years imprisonment, if said obstruction results in the bodily injury of said agent, which I think may have just happened to said agent's-- ow!" " rotator cuff." "Aah!" "LANA:20years?" "!" "ARCHER:" "Lana,lookatall that coke!" "20 years is just gonna be the" "Bac-Os on our prison salad." "Besides, technically, Woodhouse is the one obstructing." "LANA:" "Archer!" "ARCHER:" "Relax." "Theydon 't send people that old to prison." "It costs, like, two grand a day just to keep them alive." "LANA:" "I 'mtalkingaboutus!" "ARCHER:" "Hmm." "Idon 'tknow." "A hundred bucks?" "Depends who you ask, Lana." "Liberals say this much, conservatives say this much..." "LANA:" "So,nowyou 'rejust dicking around?" "ARCHER:" "Yes." "LANA:" "BetweentheFBI and a ton of cocaine." "ARCHER:" "Yes." "LANA:" "So,canIassumeyou have a plan?" "ARCHER:" "Yes." "I mean, I don't, but you can assu..." "Ow!" "Ow!" "(Holly grunts)" "Ow!" "Ow!" "Ow!" "(Holly groans)" "HOLLY:" "I 'mcoming!" "ARCHER:" "SaidRipleyto..." "Ow!" "Goddamn it, woman!" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Comeon !" "Why are you slowing down?" "!" "PAM:" "Need...gotto..." "More cocaine." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "So,please don't take this the wrong way-- because I'm loving being your" "Esmeralda-- but you may have a problem." "And it sounds like the solution is more cocaine, so turn left up there." "MALORY:" "Butwhyare you  leaving?" "They can't compel a husband and wife to testify against each other!" "RON:" "Oh,yeah?" "They may not have to compel me." "(Malory gasps)" "MALORY:" "Andwhatisthat  supposed to mean?" "!" "RON:" "Oh,whydon 'tyou ask  that guy you never heard of," "Len Trexler?" "MALORY:" "HowcanI?" "I've never heard of him." "RON:" "Youwouldn'tknowthe truth if it bit you on the ass and held on, would you?" "MALORY:" "Ron,wait!" "RON:" "What?" "!" "MALORY:" "Well,if youinsist on being an ass, I can't stop you, but there is the small matter of my putting the deed to my apartment in your name." "(Ron laughs)" "RON:" "Ah,it 'syourloss!" "I'll mail you your furs." "(Malory gasps)" "MALORY:" "Don'tyoudare!" "At the very least, I insist on a bonded courier!" "Ron?" "!" "(Holly grunts)" "ARCHER:" "Ow!" "Lana, cut it..." "Ow!" "Ow!" "(Holly groans)" "ARCHER:" "Ow!" "Ow !" "HOLLY:" "What'sthisdoormade  out of, mithril?" "ARCHER:" "Ow!" "LANA:" "Justonce,why can 't you take..." "ARCHER:" "Ow!" "LANA:...anythingseriously just once?" "ARCHER:" "Ow!" "Iwas serious about that rim jo..." "Ow!" "Seriously, please stop hitting me." "What the...?" "CYRIL:" "Oh,thankGod !" "LANA:" "Cyril?" "Wait." "How did you...?" "KRIEGER:" "Thishouseis insane." "CYRIL:" "Andscary,and gross, and I'm pretty sure I smelled a skeleton." "KRIEGER:" "No,youdefinitely smelled a skeleton." "LANA:" "Well,thisisgreat!" "CYRIL:" "How?" "!" "I inhaled skeleton!" "LANA:" "Becausenowthe coke... (loud sounds of eating) ...is getting eaten by Pam!" "Quick, make the wall spin around again!" "CYRIL:" "Itjustkindofspun by itself!" "ARCHER:" "JesusChrist,have you people never even heard of" "Scooby-Doo?" "KRIEGER:" "Oh,comeon!" "LANA:" "Ofcourse." "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Uh..." "Pam?" "(Pam roaring)" "PAM:" "Aw,crap." "(Pam grunting)" "(Cheryl/Carol laughing loudly)" "(gasps, sad roar)" "ARCHER( laughing):" "Oh,my" "God." "That's so freakin' unsafe." "LANA:" "Okay,Krieger,Cyril, get in there, and we'll spin you back around." "Archer..." "CYRIL:" "Whydo Ihavetogo  back in there?" "!" "LANA:" "BecauseIsaidso!" "KRIEGER:" "Yeah,plus skeletons?" "LANA:" "Archer?" "ARCHER:" "Gotit ." "LANA:" "Oh!" "Goddamnit!" "KRIEGER:" "Ooh!" "CYRIL:" "Goddamnit ." "ARCHER:" "Godspeed,you meddling kids." "WOODHOUSE( moaning):" "Andsir," "I'm afraid your breakfast will be four minutes late." "ARCHER:" "Yeah,duh." "I already berated you." "LANA:" "Woodhouse,getaway from the door!" "WOODHOUSE:" "Hmm?" "Oh !" "HOLLY:" "Goddamnit !" "Just what do you people think the letters FBI stand for?" "ARCHER:" "I boughtaT-shirt once where it stood for "Female" "Body Inspector."" "God, is Myrtle Beach not the best?" "HOLLY:" "Pullastuntlike this  again, you'll never make it back to Myrtle Beach." "ARCHER:" "I probablywasn't going to anyway." "Turns out it's actually not the best." "LANA:" "Andyouactuallyhave  no right to search this house." "As you can see, there's nothing illegal going on." "HOLLY:" "Maybenotnow ,but I know you still have a lot of international contacts from your" "ISIS days." "Mexico, Colombia, the Orient." "I bet it wouldn't be too hard to get set up in the drug trade." "ARCHER( laughing):" "Well, you'd be surp..." "Oh!" "LANA:" "We'renotdrugdealers," "Agent Holly." "HOLLY:" "Good,becauseI'llbe watching you..." "like a hawk that's been bred with an eagle to produce some sort of... eagle-eyed superhawk... with a badge." "LANA:" "So,am Icrazy,oris  he super weird?" "ARCHER:" "Oh,well,I'm torn," "Lana, I really am." "I want to say "both," but I also don't want you to stop my heart again, so..." "LANA:" "Who'sda widdlebaby?" "Who's da widdle baby?" "Who's da widdle baby?" "Yes, he is, widdle, little baby!" "CYRIL:" "Wait." "Thebrainchip  is in there?" "KRIEGER:" "I toldyouitwas small." "CYRIL:" "SaidRipleytothe..." "No, doesn't work there." "KRIEGER:" "Yeah,it 'scrap." "Okay, I actually only have one brain chip, so... who's our lucky winner?" "CYRIL:" "Hmm." "Iguesswehave to decide if we want regular lame Cheryl and a Pam who's not gonna overdose on cocaine and die, or potentially famous country singer Cheryl and a Pam who... tits." "KRIEGER:" "Flipacoin?" "CYRIL:" "No." "LANA:" "And,yeah,he'sa weirdo, but I think Agent" "Holly's right." "We do have a lot of international connections." "ARCHER:" "So,I'mthinkingI should take a trip down old" "Mexico way, maybe Colombia, or even Southeast Asia, or..." "Hey, where's Ron?" "MALORY:" "Neverheardofhim." "LANA:" "Um..." "ARCHER:" "Lana,letitgo." "Jesus." "MALORY:" "Butmaybeweshould try to sell out to an international cartel." "But let me be clear." "You won't be gallivanting around under the pretense of work just to visit the fleshpots of the world." "This isn't ISIS." "ARCHER:" "No,I..." "MALORY:" "Andit definitely isn't your semester abroad." "ARCHER:" "What?" "!" "Come on, that's..." "Hey, I don't think we need to go into all the..." "MALORY:" "Cobrawhiskeyand  ladyboys." "I mean..." "LANA:" "Ha!" "ARCHER:" "Shutup ." "MALORY:" "Youshutup!" "And Krieger?" "I trust the brain-chip implant was a success?" "KRIEGER:" "I think." "Imean, it's in there, and she's alive." "Now we just have to see if there were any adverse side effects." "(loud yawning)" "LANA:" "Uh..." "Cheryl?" "CHERYL/CAROL:" "Nah,Cheryl's gone." "I'm Cherlene now." "And if somebody don't fry me six goddamn eggs and some Carolina fries, I would personally be shocked-- shocked, I tell you-- if by mornin' this place ain't burnt to the ground." "(loud yawning)" "KRIEGER:" "AndI'mnot a" "I mean, I'm definitely a doctor, so... no, I think we're good." "Yup, yup, yup." "Captioned by MediaAccessGroupatWGBH  access.wgbh.org" "MAN:" "Made...in Georgia."