"Hey!" "What's up?" "Well, I have a job interview at Ralph Lauren tomorrow!" " Congratulations!" "Ohh, that's great!" " I know!" "Boy, that guy's underwear sucks!" "Wh-what?" "!" "I got this pair marked excess, *XS:" "ÃÊ¼ÒÇü excess(ÃÊ°ú,¿©ºÐ)¿Í ¹ßÀ½µ¿ÀÏ" "I gotta tell ya, there was no room for excess anything in there." "Anyway, I'm going to be the coordinator of the woman's collection," "I'll work right under the director, it's the perfect, perfect job for me!" "Wow!" "Well, if you nail the interview, you'll get it!" "Yeah." "You wanna work on your interview skills?" " O-okay!" " Okay!" "All right, let's start with the handshake." " Hi." " Hi." "Very good handshake, good wrist action." "Thank you." " Let me try." " Okay." "Oh my God!" "What did I ever do to you?" "!" "Did I squeeze it too hard?" "Let's just say, I'm glad I'm not Chandler." "That's right Ross, I can see you in your new apartment!" "And you can see me!" "Same as yesterday, same as the day before." "Is he doing his shark attack bit yet?" "Nope." "Op, wait!" "There he goes." "Very funny Ross!" "Very life-like and funny." "Okay" "Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady." "Whoa, maybe I was!" "Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl in Ross's building is flirting with me." "Get in there man!" "Flirt back, mix it up!" "Yeah, I-I-I'm down with that." "Okay, here goes." "How you a-doin'?" "It worked!" "She's waving me over." "Okay, I-I-I'll be right over." "Let's see, she's on the third floor¡¦" "Wow!" "She is pretty, huh?" "Tell me about it, huh?" "Oh no-no-no, I'm not with her, she's just Monica!" "Ewwuck!" "Hey Joey!" "Great stuff huh?" "This is your place?" "Of course it is." "Yeah, come on in." "Ooh-ooh, go by the window you can pretend to be surfing." "But I counted, you're not supposed to live here!" "Oh man!" "What happened?" "I ended up at Ross's place." "Oh, I musta missed counted or something." "Damn!" "She's not there anymore." "Oh, l-l-look, Ross is doing his 'Watching TV' bit." "No Joey, I think he's just watchin' TV." "'We've lost visual contact with the suspect.'" "Okay, now I've really have to go!" "But it's just so unfair that our date has to get cut short just 'cause some guy shot at a store clerk" "I know, but it's my job, sweethart!" "Okay, then maybe I can come too!" "'Suspect has just emerged naked from the sewer.'" "All right, you go." " Bye-bye." " 'Kay, bye!" " Oh God!" " What?" "Oh I just miss him so much!" "Wow!" "For just a week you guys are really close, huh?" "Yeah, it's weird." "I can't help it though he's so sweet, he's like this little puppy dog, y'know?" "But like a really tough one that shots bad guys." "Ohh, I just love beginning parts of relationships, y'know?" "!" "You just like can't keep your hands off each other." "I know it is the best" "So-so how long did that last for you and Chandler?" "What?" "It's still going on." "Come on, seriously!" "When did it end?" "I-I am serious, I mean, we're all over each other all the time." "Okay, you know where you are better than I do." "I was just curious." "What don't you just calm down Phoebe!" "All right?" "!" "Why don¡¯t you just get all your facts before you run around telling everybody that you're the only hot couple!" "God, I woke the beast." "Sorry." "I was wrong obviously, I just?" "I misspoke." "It's okay." "Oh no, it is okay, I mean as long as you know that Chandler and I are also very hot and fiery, just as hot as you!" "I mean our flame, whew, is on fire!" "Hey Monica, here's your broom back." "You are so cute." "Oh hey, how'd the interview go?" "Ugh, horrible!" "I did the stupidest, most embarrassing thing!" "Did you tell the guy you wanted to have sex with his wife and then fall right out of your chair?" "No!" "So what happened?" "Ugh, it was horrible!" "And" "!" "And-and the interview part went so well, y'know?" "I even made him laugh." "He said something about a boat and I was like, "Well, yeah!" "If you've got enough life jackets!"" "Trust me, it was actually, it was very funny." "Anyway, so we were saying good-bye and ugh!" "What happened?" "All right, we were shaking hands and he kinda leaned toward me¡¦ Y'know maybe he was going to open the door, but I totally miss read him and I uhhh¡¦" "You kissed him?" "!" "Well, I didn't know what else to do!" "Well you coulda tried, not kissing him." "Thanks Chandler." "Hey Rach, a guy from Ralph Lauren called, you got a second interview!" "I can't believe it!" "I got a second interview!" "Yes!" "I bet that kiss isn't looking like such a big mistake now, is it?" "What-what, wait a minute, you don't think that's why he wants me back?" "Yeah!" "No?" "A kiss?" "What are you talking about?" "I accidentally kissed him in the interview, and now he wants me back y'know of course, 'cause "Let's bring the girl back who kisses everybody!"" "Come on, Rach." "Oh my God!" "What if he thinks I'm the kind of girl that-that would just sleep with him?" "He probably wants you back because you're right for the job." "Maybe." "I-I don't know" "Oh God, how could I be so stupid?" "!" "Oh Rachel look, don't say that, , I think you just need a hug from Joey." "Come on." "Come on." "She's back!" "Hot girl's back!" "Ohh, well I'm not totally back yet, but thank you." "No, in Ross's building!" "She's back!" "She's back!" "Okay, wait there, I'll be over in a second." "Got it!" "I gotta check out this hot girl!" "There she is!" "Damnit!" "Did you move?" "!" "Yes." "I lived with you guys for a while and then I found this place." "I'm Ross." "Yes?" "Uhh do you happen to have a hot girl in there?" "No." "I'm all alone." "Yeah." "Sorry about that." "Oh, hey little girl." "Uhh, is-is your mommy, or sister, or babysitter by any chance a hot girl?" "Daddy!" "Later!" "Oh man!" "Hot girl!" "Hot girl!" " Hi Rachel!" " Hi!" " It's really nice to see you again." " Thank you." "Oh Rachel, uhh¡¦" "What?" "Just ah¡¦" "Excuse me?" " Here let me¡¦" " Wh-whoa!" "All right, okay-okay, I see, I see what's going on here!" "Now listen, look-look," "I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I am not some hussy who will just sleep around to get ahead!" "Now even though I hey-hey-hey, even though I kissed you, that does not give you the right to demand sex from me." "I do not want, this job that bad." "Good day, sir." "Ugh, you will not believe what that sleaze-ball from Ralph Lauren did too me!" "Okay-okay that-that's amazing." "How did you know that?" "You got ink on your lip." "Oh." "Ohhhhhhhhh¡¦." "So what do you say, maybe sometime I hold your gun?" "I don't know man, we're really not supposed to do that." "Oh, what can happen?" "I mean, would you¡¦" "Yeah, I'm gonna say no" "Phoebe, do you want to go see a movie after dinner tonight?" "Oh we can't, we already have plans." "What are you doing?" "Well, same thing we did all day, hang out at Gary's apartment." "He is so amazing, we never left the bedroom." "But have fun at the movie." "Oh, we're not seeing a movie!" "You're not?" "Then why did you ask us if we wanted to go?" "Oh umm, that's because I just wanted to y'know walk in on me and Chandler while we were, y'know, doing it all night." " Will you excuse me for just a second?" " Yeah!" " Chandler?" "Can I see you for a second?" " Uh, yeah." "Okay." "We have got to beat them!" "Why?" "'Cause, Gary and Phoebe think they're a hotter couple than we are!" "Ohh, so?" "So!" "So we've got to go upstairs and have a lot of sex to prove them wrong!" "Monica, you have got to stop this competitive thing!" "Okay?" "It's crazy." "I mean, just impress Gary and Phoebe we have to go upstairs and have sex over and over and I'm saying no to this, why?" "Get your coat." ""Are you the Hot Girl who waved at me?" "If so, give me a call!"" " Hey!" " Hey!" "Excuse me." "Warning!" "Intruder!" "If you see this creep - call the cops!"" "You should check this out, tell the other tenants." "Apparently he's running around looking for some kind of a hot girl." "Who isn't?" "I don't, I don't think we've meet." "I-I'm Ross." "I know." "You're the guy who wouldn't chip in for the handyman." "Nevermind!" "No, I-I actually thought it was unfair the way everyone reacted." "I mean you had just moved in." "I had just moved in." "Thank you!" "Listen umm¡¦" " Jen." " Jen," "I know this may sound a little..." "But uh, would you maybe wanna grab a cup of coffee sometime, or¡¦" "Sure!" "That would be nice." "Oh!" "My number is on there." "Give me a call." "I will give you a call." " I'll see you later." " Okay!" "I forgot my paper." "That was amazing!" "Phoebe and Gary are so gonna hear about this at dinner" "That was amazing." "We are the hottest!" "Huh?" "No one is hotter than we are!" "You're the best." "No, you're the best." "No, you're the best." "No, you're the best." "I am the best." "Hey guys!" "What 'cha been doin'?" "Hey Joey!" "Isn't that the girl that waved at you the other day?" "I don't know." "But I can see through your sheet." "Yeah, yeah, that's her." "But y'know what?" "Doesn't matter," "I'm never gonna get to meet her anyway." "Why?" "Because it's impossible to find her apartment!" "She lives in some like of hot girl parallel universe, or something." "What are you talking about?" "She obviously lives on the second floor, seventh apartment from the left!" "No." "No." "No." "She lives on the third floor, eighth apartment from the left." "No, those first two windows, that's the lobby." "And y'know the other one over there, that's the stairway." "You've been counting wrong." "I did not know that!" "Thank you Monica." "I can't believe I almost lost another girl because of counting." "So uhh, you ready?" "Sure, I'll just get my coat." "Could you get that?" " Sure." "Joey¡¦" "Dahhhhh!" "No!" "Noooo!" "Ah, first, I-I would like to say thank you for agreeing to see me again." "That's quite all right, but I feel obligated to tell you that this meeting is being videotaped." "Okay." "Umm, well, first I would like to start by apologizing for kissing you and uh, for yelling at you." "Fair enough." "Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why." "I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage." "When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no." "That shows integrity." "And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage." "Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage." "And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious." "So there you go, you got, you got courage, you got integrity, you got courage again, and not litigious." "Look Mr¡¦" " Zelner." " Zelner!" "Right!" "I knew that!" "I really, really want this job and I think, I think I would be really good at it." "Y'know what?" "I may regret this but uh," "I'm going to give you a shot." "Oh!" "You are?" "Really?" "Oh thank you!" "Oh¡¦ Oh, would it be completely inappropriate to give you a hug?" "Yes!" "Okay, well then how about a handshake?" "Oh God I'm sorry!" "Oh God, I'm sorry!" "I did not mean to touch that" "I mean you there." "There." "Uhh, okay, so thank-thank you, I'm going to leave now thank you very much uh-huh, thank you so?" "Hey!" "I'll see you Monday!" "You tired Chandler?" "You better believe he's tired, after the day we had!" "If you know what I mean." "You know what I mean?" "Honey, the tortilla chips know what you mean." "So uh Chandler, you like that badge I got you?" "Oh yeah, it's so cool." "Now I gotta go, Officer Bing has gotta, 10-100." "That's pee-pee." "Phoebe, you have a, a twig in your hair." "umm, we kinda took a little detour on the way over here." "Yeah, we took a little stroll in the park and no one was around, so¡¦" " You didn't!" " We did!" "We violated Section 12 Paragraph 7 of the criminal code!" "The park huh?" "A public place." "I hear ya." "Excuse me for just a second!" "Hi Chandler." "Monica!" "This is the Men's room!" "Isn't it?" "Yes it is." "You see I've always found the men's bathroom very sexual." "Haven't you?" "No." "And if I did, I don't think we'd be going out." "Monica, this is getting ridiculous!" "Come on, we can't let them win!" "Ugh, we have already proved that we are hot!" "Okay?" "So why-why are you getting so obsessed about this thing?" "!" "Because Phoebe and Gary are in that-can't-keep-their-hands-off-each-other-doing-it-in-the-park phase!" "So?" "I feel really sad that we're not¡¦really there anymore." "Oh wow!" "Is that what this all have been about?" "Wasn't it a lot more exciting when we were y'know all over each other all the time?" "Yeah that was great." "That was really great!" "But to tell you the truth, I'm more excited about where we are right now." "Really?" "Yeah!" "I've never been in a relationship that's lasted this long before." "Y'know to get past the beginning and still be around each other all the time," "I think that's pretty incredible." "And the fact that this is happening all with you, yeah I think that's pretty exciting." "That is so sweet." "I know that I was acting a little crazy but umm," "I feel the same way." "Y'know what I just realized?" "You just freaked out about our relationship." "Did not." " Yes you did!" "Admit it!" "You freaked out!" "Okay, I freaked out a little." "Little?" "!" "You freaked out big time!" "Okay?" "And I fixed it!" "We have switched places!" "I am the relationship and king and you are the crazy, irrational screw up!" "And now we're back." "I cannot believe Ross is buying this!" "Thank God!" "I can't watch him anymore!" "You guys ready fore the movies?" "Yeah!" "Oh by the way, thank you for loaning us Pamela and Yasmine." "Man!" "They cannot get enough!"