"[ whimsical music plays ] evenoncloudydays," "Pastryville always had a ray of sunshine, and her name was" "Granny gramcrackers." "Remember when she knit your" "Favorite scarf, black cherry pie?" "Iwearit everyday , raspberry parfait." "and,fudgeturnover,remember when she fixed your leaky roof?" "shegotheatstrokeand fell into the hedges." "whileyouwatched "tango  cash" on netflix!" "yes." "While I watched "tango  cash"" "On netflix." "and,buttermilkbiscuits,I" "Remember when granny drove you all the way to the big city" "To get -- no." "Nope." "Mnh-mnh." "...Yourtonsilsout?" "yeah- -yourunborntonsils." "[clearsthroat] now..." "Then..." "If there are no" "More speakers..." "Great!" "Then, in conclusion -- [ speed-metal music plays ]" "W-we were just wrapping up here, bitch pudding." "[ feedback ]" "Iremembergranny." "[ voice breaking ] I remember" "Her smile." "I remember how much she loved" "Baking sugar cookies." "all:" "Ahh!" "butmostof all,Iremember her rank-ass old-lady farts." "[ all gasp ] oh,god." "thisbitchhadnosenseof smell, no sense of hearing, so" "All day long, she was like "pbht!" "pbht!" "pbht!" "pbht!"" ""pbht!" "pbhhhhhht--" okay.[ chucklesnervously]" "That's enough -- andwhenyou'reahundred" "Years old, I guess panties are just an afterthought." "I mean, raise your hand if you never saw granny airing out the" "Ark of the covenant." "[ mourners gasp ]" "I hope granny is in heaven, but she had a gambling" "Addiction, so satan might be doing her up the butt." "[ mourners gasp ] knock twice if satan's doing" "You up the butt, granny." "[ old-lady voice ] I love it up" "The butt from satan, everybody!" "[ normal voice ] you rule," "Granny!" "[ laughs evilly ] [ thumping ] [ mourners gasp ]" "Ha ha!" "Now hit my [bleep]ing theme [ heavy-metal music plays ]" "[ mourners gasp, murmur ] [clearsthroat]" "Now, then -- ♪dunh-duh-duh-dunnnnnnh♪" "Bitch pudding'." "Blam!" "[ video-game music plays ] [ cackling ]" "Yeah, suck it." "youhavesavedmyvillage!" "Aah!" "youmeanmy village." "[ thunder crashing ] aw!" "Unh!" "[ groggily ] augh." "Where...?" "[folksyvoice]oh , sounds" "Like my cargo just woke up!" "hey!" "You're that damn bird that delivers our mail." "youbetyourfeathers." "But tonight, I'm gettin' paid to" "Make a special delivery." "Neither rain nor sleet nor snow will keep your ass out of that" "Volcano." "[ laughs ]" "Adios, bitch..." "Pudding." "Glurk!" "Ooh!" "Aah!" "youflyingturd!" "Who hired you?" "[choking]you killme,we both die." "goodpoint,jizzcloth." "But, on the other hand... ow!" "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!" "ohhhhhhhh!" "[bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] ow!" "Ow!" "[bleep] [bleep] [bleep] ow!" "Oh!" "Ow!" "Oh!" "[bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleeeeeeeeeeep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] [bleep] oh [bleep] [bleep]" "Mother[bleep] mother[bleep]" "Ow!" "Ow!" "[bleep] me!" "Oh, god!" "[bleep] [bleep] [bleep] ow!" "[bleep]" "Ohhh!" "[bleeeeeeeeeeeeep] [ magical music plays ] whoisshe?" "grandpappywillknow." "please,stoptalking." "Your voice is irritating as shit!" "howrude!" "well,she'snotwrong." "whoisthat?" "welcometoschlorptown," "Stranger!" "We are the schlorps." "And my name is grandpappy schlorp." "areyouin chargeofthis  shithole?" "youseeanyoneelsewith a beard around here?" "weshouldschlorpthe "getto know you" song!" "[ laughter ] no." "[ peppy music plays ] all:♪ ifyouget toknow me," "Then I'll get to know you ♪ ♪ once you're in my group," "You're a friend through-and-through ♪" "♪I 'mfishingpoleschlorp, and I catch all the fish ♪" "♪I 'mbasketballschlorp♪ ♪ watch this!" "♪ all:" "Swish!" "♪I 'mI.B.S.Schlorp♪" "♪ you'll find me in the stalls ♪ ♪I 'mwintertimeschlorp♪" "♪ I'm sweating off my balls ♪ ♪I 'mtheschlorpwho come" "From china ♪ ♪I 'mtheschlorpwitha" "Vagina ♪ ♪I 'mtheschlorpwho plays" "Kazoo ♪ ♪I 'mtheschlorpwho" "Knows kung fu ♪ so sorry!" "all:♪ so,howaboutit, stranger ♪" "♪ tell us all about you ♪ ♪shutthe[bleep]u-u-up!" "♪ [ discordant note plays ] [ stomach growls ] oh,god!" "I'm not gonna make it." "I'm not gonna make it." "I'm not gonna make it." "[ farts, squirts ]" "Aw." "I didn't make it." "ow,youoldbastard!" "thereyougo ." "Goodasnew." "Ah, schlorpette." "Is that the schlorp nut soup for our guest?" "yes,butthisisthelastof our schlorp nuts." "They're all gone." "aww." "The last of the schlorp nuts." "And with winter on its way... [slurps] this tastes like moose dick!" "[ bowl shatters ] I got to go home!" "Some asshole tried to kill me, so that asshole's gonna get my" "Boot up his asshole." "withtheschlorpnutsgone ," "Our village faces starvation." "You see, the nuts were stolen by" "The evil squirrel wizard on one tree hill." "[scoffs] itwascalledthatbeforethe" "Show." "thissquirrelsoundslikea" "Pussy." "thenperhapswe canmakea" "Deal." "bringournutshomeandwe" "Help get your butt home." "[moansloudly] whodaresdisturbthe sa- - blam!" "Haungh, haungh, hungh!" "Lick my taco, squirrel wizard." "Give those dicks their nuts back!" "bitchpudding!" "That's not the squirrel wizard!" "huh?" "Whothehellisit ?" "trevor?" "Trevor?" "!" "Oh, my god!" "Trevor!" "hislifepartner." "yuh-oh." "rrrrrrrrrrah!" "aaaaaah!" "squirrelalert!" "Squirrel alert!" "rrrrrrrrrgh!" "ohh!" "suckonthis!" "Suck on this!" "Suck on this!" "ow!" "Ooh!" "Ow !" "can'tstay." "Gottago." "Blam." "stayandfight,coward!" "ai!" "Ai!" "Ai !" "Ai !" "Ai !" "whew." "Safe." "[gurgles] oh,shit!" "They're getting massacred." "Who cares about those purple peckers?" "They never should have trusted me." "Or..." "Or helped me?" "andatthatmoment, bitch pudding's heart grew" "Three sizes bigger." "Uh, metaphorically." "You know, you'll just have to take my word for it." "die,youmiserableschlorps!" "And when you meet god, slap that" "Mother[bleep] in the face, because existence is nothing but" "His cruel joke on all of us!" "sorry,spunksponge!" "The schlorps are under my protection!" "[coughs] uh..." "Startingnow!" "[ action music plays ] ooh!" "blick!" "oh!" "[ neck cracks ]" "aah,trevor!" "Punch!" "Punch!" "ba-ba-ba-blam!" "unh!" "[ sobbing ] trevor!" "My fuzzy little angel!" "Just do it!" "End me!" "Use any death spell you choose!" "Just say the magic words and end my pain!" "abracadabra." "agh!" "eatshit." "myschlorps..." "Gone." "All gone." "asyourchampion,aeulogyis" "Probably in order." "[ clears throat ]" "What can be said -- ow!" "[ airplane engine whirs ] huh?" "Where?" "What?" "onbehalfof "[ bleep]you airlines," go [bleep] yourself." "aaaaaaaaagh!" "oooooh!" "Unh!" "Unh!" "Unh!" "I-I..." "I'm..." "Home." "What the [bleep] tossbitchpuddinginthe volcano and win a prize!" "volcano-friedbitchpudding on a stick." "Ihateyou,bitchpudding'!" "[ bell dings ] theywereallinonit !" "The whole town tried to kill" "Me?" "!" "♪shemadeour livesaliving" "Hell ♪ ♪ so nasty and so mean ♪" "♪ and when bitch pudding hit the lava ♪" "♪ you should have heard her scream ♪ thefirstannual "bitch pudding is dead" festival" "Has been a rousing success!" "For generations to come," "We will -- [ sniffs ]" "Hey, guys, do you smell smoke?" "[ people murmuring ] [ all screaming ] oh,shit!" "thedoorwon'topen!" "[ pounding on door ] aaaaaaah!" "All together, now." "all:" "One!" "Two!" "Three!" "Oh!" "Oh!" "[ dramatic music plays ] blam." "[ all screaming ]" "[moaning] rememberwhenIsaidI'd" "Shoot you last?" "Ihaveabsolutelynomemory" "Of that." "musthavebeenafantasyI" "Had when I was masturbating." "[bleep]you,bitchpudding." "[ heavy-metal music plays ] sothat'smy story." "I probably should have done a" "Voiceover through the whole thing, but I didn't feel like" "It." "Now, the only question is..." "What does the future hold?" "bitchpudding." "You have become a part of a larger universe." "[ action music plays ]" "♪dunh-duh-duh-dunnnnnnh♪ blam!" "whata bitch."