"What?" "Was the joke that bad?" "I'm gonna kill you." "What?" "I didn't quite catch that." "You're gonna have to speak up." "Not today not tomorrow but I'm gonna kill you." "Jesus." "Simon... what did he have, a knife?" "Uh, he had a hatchet." "A hatchet?" "He had an ax." "Simon's my right-hand man." "Having one of those is important." "I mean, what do you have left without them?" "A whole lot of work." "Do you have one?" "Maybe one of these fine people still breathing?" "Oh." "Or did I..." "Sure." "Yeah." "Give me his ax." "I'll be right back." "Maybe Rick will be with me." "And if not, well, we can just turn these people inside out, won't we?" "I mean... the ones that are left." "Let's go for a ride." "Wow." "What a piece of shit." ""I'm gonna kill you."" "Are you kiddin' me?" "Did you see what just happened, what I just did?" "You just..." "Your best chance... is to stand up, grab that ax, and drive it through the back of my head." "See how you do." "Keep acting' tough." "Go ahead." "Grab the damn ax." "Drop it." "Ohh." "Don't make me get up again." "Well, look at that." "Dawn is breakin'." "It's a brand-new day, Rick." "I want you to think about what could have happened think about what happened, and think about what can still happen." "Oh!" "Boom!" "That remind you of anybody you know?" "Oh, yeah." "You are mine." "The people back there... they are mine." "This..." "This is mine." "Hey, Rick... go get my ax." "Let's be friends." "Oh." "Get my ax." "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Ohh!" "Bet you thought you were all gonna grow old together, sittin' around the table at Sunday dinner and the happily ever after." "No." "Doesn't work like that, Rick." "Not anymore." "Think about what happened." "I simply cannot decide." "I got an idea." "Eenie meenie... miney... mo... catch a tiger by... his toe." "If... he hollers let him go." "My mother... told me to pick... the very... best... one and you... are it." "Anybody moves, anybody says anything, cut the boy's other eye out and feed it to his father, and then we'll start." "You can breathe." "You can blink." "You can cry." "Hell, you're all gonna be doing that." "Oh!" "Look at that!" "Taking it like a champ!" "Suck... my... nuts." "Did you hear that?" "He said, "Suck my nuts."" "Phew." "Oh, my goodness!" "Look at this!" "You guys, look at my dirty girl!" "Sweetheart..." "Lay your eyes on this." "Oh, damn." "Were you..." "Were you together?" "That sucks." "But if you were, you should know there was a reason for all this." "Red... and hell, he was, is, and will ever be red." "He just took one or six or seven for the team!" "So take... a damn look." "Take a damn look!" "Daryl!" "No!" "Oh, no." "That?" "Oh, my!" "That... is a no-no." "The whole thing... not one bit of that shit flies here." "Do you want me to do it?" "Right here." "No." "No, you don't kill them... not until you try a little." "And anyway... that's not how it works." "Now, I already told you people... first one's free, then... what'd I say?" "I said I would shut that shit down!" "No exceptions." "Now, I don't know what kind of lying assholes you've been dealing with but I'm a man of my word." "First impressions are important." "I need you to know me." "So back to it." "No!" "Buddy, you still there?" "I just don't know." "It seems like you're trying to speak, but you just took a hell of a hit." "I just popped your skull so hard, your eyeball just popped out, and it is gross as shit!" "Maggie, I'll find you." "Oh." "Oh, hell." "I can see this is hard on you guys." "I am sorry." "I truly am." "But I did say it." "No exceptions!" "You bunch of pussies." "I'm just getting started." "Lucille is thirsty." "She is a vampire bat." "What?" "Was the joke that bad?" "People died, Rick." "It's what happened." "Doesn't mean the rest of them have to." "Get me my ax." "Get me... my... ax!" "I thought you were the guy, Rick." "Maybe you're not." "We'll give it one more go." "Now, I really want you to try this time." "Last chance." "Bring me my ax!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Clock is ticking, Rick!" "Think about what can still happen." "Attaboy!" "We're here, prick." "This must be hard for you, right?" "I mean, you have been King Shit for so long." "Losin' two of your own like..." "Gettin' 'em clipped like that, one nut, then the other, and in front of your boy?" "That is some screwed-up shit!" "Ah." "Oh." "Goody." "You were in charge." "Hell you were probably... addic7ed to it." "And now, well, clip, clip..." "that's over." "But you can still lead... a nice, productive life producing for me." "I think you're gonna need it." "I just got a feelin'." "So take it." "Here we are." "Let me ask you something, Rick... do you even know what that little trip was about?" "Speak when you're spoken to." "Okay." "Okay." "That trip was about the way that you looked at me." "I wanted to change that." "I wanted you to understand." "But you're still looking at me the same damn way like I shit in your scrambled eggs, and that's not gonna work." "So do I give you another chance?" "Yeah." "Yes." "Yes." "Okay." "All right." "And here it is... the grand-prize game." "What you do next will decide whether your crap day becomes everyone's last crap day or just another crap day." "Get some guns to the back of their heads." "Good." "Now... level with their noses, so if you have to fire... it'll be a real mess." "Kid..." "Right here." "Kid... now." "You a southpaw?" "Am I a what?" "You a lefty?" "No." "Good." "That hurt?" "No." "Should." "It's supposed to." "All right." "Get down on the ground, kid, next to Daddy." "Spread them wings." "Simon you got a pen?" "Yeah." "Sorry, kid." "This is gonna be as cold as a warlock's ballsack, just like he was hanging his ballsack above you and dragging it right across the forearm." "There you go." "Gives you a little leverage." "Please." "Please." "Please don't." "Please don't." "Me?" "I ain't doing shit." "Ahh." "Rick, I want you to take your ax... cut your son's left arm off, right on that line." "Now, I know..." "I know." "You're gonna have to process that for a second." "That makes sense." "Still, though, I'm gonna need you to do it, or all these people are gonna die." "Then Carl dies, then the people back home die... and then you, eventually." "I'm gonna keep you breathing for a few years, just so you can stew on it." "You..." "You don't have to do this." "We understand." "We understand." "You understand." "Yeah." "I'm not sure that Rick does." "I'm gonna need a clean cut right there on that line." "Now, I know this is a screwed-up thing to ask, but it's gonna have to be like a salami slice... nothing messy, clean, 45 degrees... give us something to fold over." "We got a great doctor." "The kid'll be fine." "Probably." "Rick this needs to happen now... chop, chop... or I will crush the little fella's skull myself." "It can..." "It can..." "It can be me." "It can be me." "W-W..." "Y-You can do it to me." "I c..." "I can go with... with you." "No." "This is the only way." "Rick... pick up the ax." "Not making a decision is a big decision." "You really want to see all these people die?" "You will." "You will see every ugly thing." "Oh, my God." "Are you gonna make me count?" "Okay, Rick." "You win." "I am counting." " 3!" " Please." "Please." "It can be me." "Please!" " 2!" " Please, don't do..." "This is it." "Aaah!" "1." "Dad... just do it." "Just do it." "Rick." "You answer to me." "You provide for me." "You belong to me." "Right?" "Speak when you're spoken to!" "You answer to me." "You provide for me." "Provide for you." "You belong to me, right?" "!" "Right." "Right." "That is the look I wanted to see." "We did it... all of us, together... even the dead guys on the ground." "Hell, they get the spirit award, for sure." "Today was a productive damn day!" "Now, I hope, for all your sake... that you get it now that you understand how things work." "Things have changed." "Whatev you had going for you that is over now." "Ah." "Dwight load him up." "He's got guts... not a little bitch like someone I know." "I like him." "He's mine now." "But you still want to try something?" ""Not today, not tomorrow."" ""Not today, not tomorrow"?" "I will cut pieces off of..." "Hell's his name?" " Daryl." " Wow." "That actually sounds right." "I will cut pieces off of Daryl and put them on your doorstep... or, better yet, I will bring him to you and have you do it for me." "Ahh!" "Welcome to a brand-new beginning, you sorry shits!" "I'm gonna leave you a truck." "Keep it." "Use it to cart all the crap you're gonna find me." "We'll be back for our first offering in one week." "Until then... ta-ta." "Maggie." "Maggie." "Maggie... you need to sit down." "Maggie." "No." "We need to get you to the Hilltop." "You need to go get ready." "For what?" "To fight them." "They have Daryl." "They have an army." "We would die... all of us." "Go home." "Take everybody with you." "I can get there by myself." "You can barely stand up." "I need to go." "You need to go to Alexandria." "You were out... out here for me." "We still are." "I can make it now." "I need you to go back." "I can't have you out here." "I can't have you all out here anymore." "I need you to go back." "Maggie... we're not letting you go." "Okay?" "You have to." "It's not gonna happen." "I'm taking her." "I'm gonna get her there." "I'm gonna keep her safe." "I'm not giving you a choice." "I'm taking him with me." "I'm gonna take him." "That's what I'm gonna do." "I need to do this." "Please." "We need to help you." "I got it." "I got it." "No." "No." "Pl..." "Pl..." "Please let us." "He..." "He's our family, t..." "He's our family, too." "You're okay." "All right." "On three." "1, 2..." "Yeah." "Bet you thought you were all gonna grow old together, sittin' around the table at Sunday dinner and the happily ever after." "No." "Doesn't work like that, Rick." "Not anymore."