"Here we are." "That's too bad." "Your mother, how's she holding up?" "She cries a lot." "l understand." "And you?" "How are you?" "People ask me that a lot." "It's a weird question." "Every time I start to give too long of an answer which I'm starting to do right now, people get very uncomfortable." "Not you, though, huh?" "You're an old pro at this." "You could say that." "I'm fine." "That one." "Very nice choice." "Very tasteful." "Thank you." "Hey." "Hey." "What's with the furrowed brow?" "You're gonna give yourself a wrinkle." "Pace, I got some bad news." "You don't look like you're kidding." "Doug's been trying to reach you." "He left messages at the restaurant." "l meant to call him back." "You probably should've." "What's going on?" "It's Mitch." "He's dead." "What?" "Well, how?" "lt was a car accident." "And is everybody--?" "I mean--?" "They're all fine." "lt's just Mitch." "He was alone." "When did this happen?" "It happened a couple of nights ago." "How's Dawson doing?" "Well, he's not so good." "His father's dead." "Right." "That's a stupid question." "No, you're entitled, believe me." "I've said about 800 stupid things to him in the last couple of days." "But do you want to come with me?" "Do you think I should?" "What are you talking about?" "Well, I...." "Maybe he doesn't want me there, Jo." "Okay, your father dies tomorrow." "You're at the funeral." "You see Dawson." "Would that mean something?" "Would seeing your oldest friend--?" "Give me five minutes." "Be right there." "Here you go." "All right, thanks." "Can I talk to you about something?" "Sure." "l'm nervous." "About what?" "Seeing him." "Why?" "Because I don't know what to say." "I don't think he's expecting you to give a speech, Jen." "I couldn't sleep last night." "I was up and tossing and turning trying to figure out what to say, how to act." "No one ever knows what to say." "When Tim died, you wouldn't believe the things people said." "But the thing is, no matter what you say or do Dawson is alone in this, okay?" "There isn't a word or a sentence in the English language that can take away the kind of pain he's dealing with." "Well, so, then, what do I do?" "You just gotta figure out your own way of being there for him." "Okay." "Man." "You having a good birthday?" "Yeah, definitely." "How's it feel to be 1 2 years old?" "Pretty good." "l think I'm ready for a girlfriend." "Oh, you think so?" "Yeah." "Well, I'd say give it a few years." "You got plenty of time before girls start clouding your head." "Okay." "Did you like all your gifts?" "l loved them, especially 1941." "Which was not easy to find, let me tell you." "Thank you, Dad." "Don't mention it." "You know, I could be wrong but I think you got one more gift coming." "No. I opened them all." "Are you sure?" "Pretty sure." "I don't know." "I think maybe you better take a look in the closet." "Go on." "Well, come on!" "Bring it out." "Open it up." "The guy at the store said it was a good one for making movies." "Great editing capabilities, and it comes with its own tripod." "Thank you, Dad." "You're welcome, Dawson." "Dad, this must have been expensive, but you're not gonna regret it." "I'm gonna make so many movies on this." "This is not a phase." "Oh, don't worry about that, Dawson." "Just enjoy it." "Let the things you love be your escape." "Dawson?" "Joey." "Hey." "You're smiling." "l was?" "You were." "is there anything I can do?" "Actually, there is." "Would you watch Lily for a little bit?" "l've gotta get to the funeral home." "Of course." "Great." "is that what you're wearing?" "It's nice." "No." "Actually, it's for my dad." "He's gonna be buried in it." "I'm sorry." "Jo, that's okay." "You couldn't have known that." "I won't be long." "Why don't you let me take her for a while, dear?" "I'm afraid I can't do that, Grams." "Lily here offers a great buffer." "As long as I'm holding her, people tend not to come up and offer their platitudes." "Where's your mother?" "She's upstairs." "She won't come down." "So, what's yours?" "My what?" "Your platitude." "I'm afraid I'm fresh out." "Really?" "I thought for sure you'd whip out "The Lord works in mysterious ways."" "The Lord and I, we...." "We aren't on speaking terms this week." "Listen, Joey, I don't want you climbing up the trellis anymore, okay?" "It's dangerous." "You could hurt yourself." "And if that happened, I don't think my son would ever forgive me." "Yeah, right." "Sooner or later, Joey, he's gonna pull his head out of the sand." "He'll figure it out." "Probably not as soon as you'd like." "Boys are stupid like that." "Hey." "Hey." "What you doing?" "Trying to decide between a glass of orange juice and a bottle of wine." "Any thoughts?" "Well wine's fine, but whiskey's quicker." "What about narcotics?" "Oh, even better." "Times like this, I really wish I was more of a drug person." "But starting up just seems like such a hassle." "Plus, you can't score good dope in Capeside." "Good point." "Orange juice it is." "So I've been trying to figure out exactly what it is I'm supposed to say to you." "Because I feel terrible, Dawson." "I really do." "I mean, I can't imagine what you're going through." "And I feel so helpless." "I mean, if this were about a girl I could offer sage advice, but this is out of my league." "The only person that was ever taken from me was my grandfather and that was a long time coming, you know?" "So here's what I'm gonna do." "I'm gonna give you a hug, and I'm not gonna let go for a long time." "I'm gonna tell you that I love you, which is a pretty good deal." "It means that I'll do anything on the off chance it'll make you a little less sad." "That sounds very good to me." "Okay." "I can't believe that he's gone." "I keep expecting to hear his car in the driveway his keys in the lock, footsteps on the stairs." "So how's the party?" "It's fabulous." "The pâté is all the rage." "And how's our boy?" "He's great." "He's keeping it all together." "Which is exactly what bothers me." "Me too." "He's stubborn, Joey, like his father." "You know, I know this probably doesn't mean much now but he's not really gone, you know." "Because if ever there was someone who was a reflection of his father..." "...it's Dawson." "You think so?" "You know, growing up, spending all that time with you guys I think I was too little to really understand it, but l-- l always knew there was something special about the way you guys looked at each other." "Like you were in on this great little secret that the rest of us weren't privy to." "My parents never had that, not even in the best of times." "I'm not gonna sit here and try to pretend to know what was going through his mind before he died but I know your husband loved you very much." "Hey." "Dawson." "Hey, man." "Thanks for coming." "Of course." "Though I can't say this is the way I wanted to see you for the first time." "Yeah, I know what you mean." "How was your summer?" "My summer was really good." "It was really, really good." "It totally cleared my head." "Good." "How's film school treating you?" "I'm thinking about dropping out, actually." "Why?" "It's a long story." "Gotcha." "I'm sorry, Dawson." "I wish I had something better to say, but that's what it boils down to." "I'm really, really sorry." "Remember the time he caught us smoking out here?" "Yeah. l" " Of course I remember." "Sixth grade, right?" "I don't think I've ever seen your father so mad." "Mitch tells us he was concerned for us, which was a surprise to me." "If it was my father, it would be different." "I guarantee I'd still be smoking to this day just to piss him off." "Well I should probably head inside and make myself useful or something." "Of course." "lt was good to see you, Pace." "Yeah." "Come here." "Dawson." "You probably don't remember me, Dawson, but I'm Susan." "I'm an old friend of your mother's from college." "Right." "You're my mom's Deadhead friend." "That's right." "Tell me, are you dealing with your grief?" "l'm dealing." "How are you dealing with it?" "Not to be rude, but I don't know what you're talking about." "Where are you channelling your feelings about your father's passing?" "Not to be rude, again, but I really don't have the time or the luxury" "You must take the time, Dawson." "Hi." "You've reached the Leerys." "Minus Dawson, that is, who can be reached in sunny California these days." "If you have a message for Gale, Lily or myself, however, leave it at the tone." "Hey." "l'm fine." "I'm...." "l'm fine." "Not one of my finer moments, huh?" "You know, a long time ago it must have been a couple of months after my mom passed away I was digging through this drawer in the kitchen looking for a pen or something and I came across this grocery list she had made and it was filled with all these little heart-shaped doodles and I just lost it." "I cried like a baby for hours." "If what just happened to you in there had happened to me back then..." "..." "I would have run away screaming." "l can't do that." "Who says?" "l do. I can't." "My mom's a wreck." "I gotta keep it together." "She's allowed to be a wreck, and so are you." "I'll make you a deal." "You take care of your mom." "I'll take care of you." "I gotta say, Jo, I...." "When your mom died, I sympathised, and I felt bad but I had no idea it felt like this." "Nothing feels real." "It's like I've been transported to an alternate universe where l'm just walking around outside my body all day long." "It'll get better. I promise." "That's good." "Any advice on how I should deal with the fact..." "...that my father's death was my fault?" "What?" "How do you figure that?" "Come on, Jo." "Think about it." "If I hadn't come back, none of this would have happened." "Look at me." "Your father died in a car accident." "There was nothing you could do to stop that." "That's not entirely true, Jo." "That's...." "I mean.... lf l hadn't showed up that morning Mom wouldn't have made breakfast, so they wouldn't have run out of milk which means my dad wouldn't have driven to the store..." "...so Lily would have some." "That's crazy." "Don't tell me what's crazy, Jo." "For all I know, my dad was driving along that night having some argument with me in his head, and took his eyes off the road" "Look, you can't do this to yourself." "You know what he said to me the last time I saw him?" "He said I was making a huge mistake and that he was disappointed in me." "I know." "You told me that." "Do you remember what else you told me?" "He said he loved you very much." "I'll never go through life doubting that my father loved me, Jo but do you have any idea how much it sucks to know that my father was disappointed in me the day he died?" "And he was right. I was acting crazy." "Like a spoiled brat." "If I'd listened, he would have been driving me to the airport instead of driving to his death." "You all right, dear?" "Oh, I'm hanging in there, I guess." "You know, every night for 46 years I prayed the good Lord would take me first." "I never wanted to go on without him." "I didn't think I was capable of it." "But somehow, I was." "It wasn't easy, but inevitably there comes a day that isn't as bad as the one before it." "And until then?" "Well, that's what prescription medication is for." "Oh, it's a strange thing we do." "What's that?" "Falling in love." "You share your life with another person you give them your heart to the extent that losing them could potentially destroy you." "It's a crazy thing to do." "You're right. lt's insane." "Then why on earth do we do it?" "What else is there?" "Oh, I wish I still lived next door." "So do I." "I could stay for a while if you like, help out with Lily." "That is such a generous offer, Evelyn, and I do love you for it, but...." "No, I think Dawson and I are gonna have to meet this one head-on." "You're sure?" "l'm sure." "Well, I understand." "But don't you hesitate to pick up the phone, young lady." "We merry widows have to stick together." "Hey." "Hey." "Everyone's starting to leave." "l'll see you." "l can stay as long as you want." "That's sweet of you, Jo." "l'm serious." "l know..." "...but you gotta get back to school." "School doesn't matter right now." "I'll be okay." "Joey, I want to be alone." "Okay?" "Okay." "Call me if you need me." "Will you do that?" "l will." "Bye." "You know, I can't say as I have ever seen the Potter B  B quite so crowded." "Nothing like a funeral to drum up business." "You want to know what the worst part about death is?" "It has this horrible tendency of putting everyone in a really bad mood." "When I go, I want to go in a way in which it makes everybody laugh." "No matter how sudden or tragic the circumstances you just can't help but laugh." "Like getting run over by a car full of clowns." "That's kind of funny, right?" "You smiled." "Mission accomplished." "He blames himself, you know." "Why?" "Well he wanted to drop out of USC and move to Boston." "Mitch thought he was crazy, and they had this huge blowup." "Why would Dawson Leery, of all people, want to drop out of film school?" "I get it." "It's okay." "You can tell me." "I won't get upset." "Pace, I didn't ask him to, if that's what you mean." "Look, if anybody understands the various shades of grey here, it's me." "It's time that the two of you got your shot." "The way I see it, you never did." "And this world could use as many Romeo and Juliets as it can get." "Look what happened to them." "This thing's gonna be tiptop, baby." "Don't you worry." "I'm not worried. I'll just call someone to fix it when the bottom falls out." "Oh, ye of little faith." "Mrs." "Leery, have I ever let you down?" "No, Mr. Leery, you haven't." "What do you think he's gonna be?" "If he's anything like you, a pain in the ass." "A lot of fathers want their sons to play baseball." "Not me." "Team sports teach conformity." "I hope he's a freak." "A freak?" "Yeah." "Freaks never peak in high school." "They never grow up to sell real estate drink on the weekends and beat their kids." "Well, then, let's hope for a freak." "Mom, are you okay?" "Yeah." "For the moment." "You want to know what the worst part is?" "What?" "She'll never even know he existed." "Not if I have anything to do about it." "She's gonna hear about her daddy every chance I get." "Oh, I'm such a mess." "l'm sorry, honey." "Mom, don't ever apologize." "You are gonna get your life back, I promise." "Mom, I'm not going anywhere." "Not anytime soon." "My place is here with you and Lily." "Honey you don't have to be so strong all the time." "You can fall to pieces just about any time you want." "There's nothing to be ashamed of." "I'm not ashamed." "I just...." "l don't know." "Everybody keeps on asking me, " How you doing?" "How you feeling?"" "The truth is I don't feel anything." "Not a thing. I'm numb." "Which, to tell you the truth, is really not so bad." "Great until it all comes crumbling down." "Well until then." "Okay, Pacey, now, got your foot on the brake?" "Okay, put her in reverse." "And gently...." "Careful." "Watch the flowers." "My wife will have me killed." "And park." "There you go, Pacey." "You did it." "You know how to drive." "Not terribly well, mind you, but good enough to pass that test." "Thank you for your help, Mr. Leery." "lt's my pleasure." "Just sorry your father had to work." "Yeah, me too." "Go easy on him, Pacey." "Can't always be fun being sheriff of these parts." "I guess I just wish he was around more." "Listen." "You ever want to practice, you knock on my door." "Okay?" "Okay." "Hey, man." "Hey." "How you doing today?" "He's still dead. lt still sucks." "Wanna go for a ride with me?" "What the hell are we doing here?" "Want to show you something." "According to my brother, your father was driving here at 45 miles an hour." "Which is, granted, a little above the speed limit but not unusual for this stretch of road." "At the same time, a man named Gary Peters was getting off work driving down the road farther up, around the bend." "Gary Peters is a pretty average guy." "Thirty-five years old, wife, two kids." "A baggage handler for Blue Star Airlines." "Gary pulled a double shift that day." "And when he came around that bend, he was asleep." "Why are you doing this, Pacey?" "Why?" "Because I want you to know that Gary Peters killed your father." "He should've known better than to get behind the wheel." "For the rest of his life he will carry the guilt of taking Mitch Leery away from his wife and two kids." "And I want you to know that that guy is not you." "It's not you, Dawson." "Do not blame yourself for this." "You want to grieve?" "Go right ahead." "Be my guest." "But do not for one single second think that this is your fault because it is not your fault." "You got your father for 1 8 years, and that is more than some people get." "And your father did one hell of a job, Dawson." "He made you into a man." "And he made you into a man that people care about and admire and respect and, most importantly, love." "So why am I doing this?" "I'm doing this because, once upon a time, you and I were best friends." "And that means that whenever you need me, I'm here." "Anytime, anywhere, anyplace." "Forever." "You understand that?" "We should get going." "What was he like?" "Well, he was a dad." "I mean that in the best possible way." "He was warm and caring and just the kind of pain in the ass you secretly want your parents to be." "How's Dawson doing?" "I wouldn't know." "Didn't want anything to do with me." "I thought I'd be able to help him." "I thought I'd be this incredible resource because I've been there, you know but he didn't want anything from me." "He didn't even want to sit in silence." "He just wanted me out of his sight." "Honey?" "Yeah?" "We're out of milk." "Would you mind--?" "I can't tell you how sorry I am for your loss, Dawson." "Thank you, Mr. Brennan." "I appreciate it." "He was here, you know." "That night." "Your father." "l know." "l asked him about you." "He said you were a royal pain in the ass." "That's me." "He was proud, though." "How do I know that, huh?" "When I mentioned your name, his whole face just lit up." "He said you were this brave kid but he had no idea how you got to be that way." "He said you had a romantic streak a mile long and he said he was proud to know you." "I'm sorry if that makes you sad but I figure if somebody says that about you, you ought to know it." "Don't forget your change." "And be certain to convey my condolences to your mother." "Thank you. I will." "All right!" "I think I've got it figured out." "Okay, quick." "Let's go, everybody." "Gather." "What this family really needs is another picture." "Don't be so fresh." "Lose the 'tude, dude." "Clever, Dad." "Smiles, people." "All right." "That was wonderful. I am late for the movies with Joey, Jack and Jen." "Have fun, honey." "No drinking and driving." "Dad, going to the movies is not code for getting wasted." "Go, go." "Get out of here." "Have fun." "Later, creators." "This one's hungry." "Oh, need some help?" "Stay and play with your camera." "Boys and their toys." "Subtitles by sdl Media Group"