"I was reading the paper this morning drinking my third cup of coffee and checking my horoscope to see what I can expect today." "It said my intuitive intelligence would be working overtime and that I would enjoy financial and romantic success." "I was about to pop out to buy fresh breath mints and play the lottery when I realised that I was reading the paper from yesterday... I couldn't even be bothered to look for today's paper." "I knew exactly how things would pan out." "Aguy like me never has two good days in a row." "They are too salty." "So why do you eat them?" "Because I am hungry." "Although I am sure the food will be great." "Imagine that Rune is getting married again already." "When did he get divorced?" "Ayear ago?" "Yes, thereabouts." "The wife walked out on him with the neighbour." "I always thought he was gay." "He's lucky she didn't get the house." "l wouldn't call him lucky." "You know what I mean." "Can I have some peanuts?" "Give me some more fucking peanuts!" "Buy your own." "These are mine." "Do you know where we are?" "l have a pretty good idea..." "Do you think his marriage will last this time?" "Do I think she is the perfect match for him?" "Nothing is perfect!" "Do you think it will last?" "Difficult to say." "Do you have to smoke every time we go somewhere?" "Focus on yourpeanuts." "There is none left." "What are you doing?" "I just hoovered the car." "So what?" "It's so fucking disgusting and it reeks of cigarettes." "Do you want to walk?" "You don't appreciate the lift?" "Want to give me some petrol money?" "25 kroner would be reasonable." "25 kroner for what?" "For taking you to the marriage." "You don't even know where we are." "And you are going too." "You are fucking out of orderright now." "Do you know where we are?" "It doesn't seem like it." "It's already 20 past." "We won't make the ceremony." "So?" "The seats are so uncomfortable." "It's fucking boring listening to the priest going on about God and Rune didn't make you his best man so you're not missing out." "He didn't make you his best man either." "Are you lost?" "No, we are lost!" "I hope you brought the invitation or have a map in the car or something." "You know I don't." "The car belong to my parents." "Let's turn this banger around and go back and find the invite." "Then we might make it back in time for the appetiser. I am starving." "You could have used your brain and thought of it." "I didn't expect you to be dumb enough to get us lost." "Shut up!" "Spare me yourteenage tantrum and thinking everyone is against you." "l have never said that!" "You have, and I know why!" "You think everyone is conspiring against you." "Give me an example. I was looking forward to going to the wedding but yourthoughts are somewhere else." "What's going on?" "lt's difficult to say." "To say, or to tell me?" "I don't want to discuss this." "It's a argument you can't win." "But I wouldn't lose it as big as you would." "Shut the fuck up and help me find the invitation." "It was supposed to be on the fridge." "You moron, how are we going to find the place?" "Will I have to pay extra because the trip is taking longer?" "." "Get over it!" "Get over what?" "That I have to pay more or that we're going to be late?" "Now shut the fuck up!" "Axel, fuck you!" "Are you trying to strangle me?" "Emergency services, one moment please." "Emergency services..." "Hello, emergency services." "Viktor, hello!" "Where are you?" "Hello!" "Are you there?" "Have you ever felt a kind of"squish" underneath your shoes?" "Common sense tells you not to look down and that is exactly why you do just that." "And what you see makes your blood run cold." "Makes dog shit taste like roast..." "Fucking prime ribs!" "That's what I've just done." "Fucking big time!" "That fucking bastard!" "One hour ago my shoes were clean!" "Fuck!"