"I'm dying for love of you, Maria." "See how my hand shakes." "For a butcher, this is very dangerous." "What am I going to do with you, Marcel?" "Won't you ever give up?" "Never." "Time is in my favor." "One of these days you will outgrow those childish religious scruples." "That has nothing to do with how I..." "Oh, what is the use?" "Just give me the meat Mama ordered." "Oh, pardon me, mademoiselle." "I wonder if you could tell me where I could find the estate agent?" " Monsieur Paraulis?" " Yes." " That is..." " I tried there." "He's out." "Oh..." "You see the cafe?" "The table with the three men." " Yes?" " He's on the right." " Thank you very much." " Monsieur." "Monsieur Paraulis?" "Hmm?" " Oui." " Henry Dussard." " Dussard..." " Yes." "Dussard!" "From America, yes?" "The nephew of Old Antan." "Come all the way from America to claim his inheritance. (CHUCKLES)" " I was expecting you, monsieur." " Thank you." "This is your first visit to St. Prioust en Pegoustan," "n'est-ce pas, monsieur?" " Yes, it is." "But I have a feeling I've been here before." " You know that feeling?" " To be sure!" "Sometimes I feel that way about America, so much have I heard about it." "You have come into a fine old property, monsieur." "uh-huh." "I can get a very handsome price for you." "No." "No, thank you, Monsieur Paraulis." "The place is not for sale." "This is an olive farm, right?" "Well, I intend to work it, live on it myself." " After all, 500 olive trees..." " Four hundred and eighty." "Well, give or take a few, that's still a lot of trees." "Should be a real good living, you know." "They are worthless." "Worthless?" "The cost of labor, monsieur, the olives would never support you." "Now, wait." "My mother used to live in this town." "She always told me there was money in olives." "Times change, monsieur." "The world is watching its weight." "Olive oil is out of fashion." "Do yourself a favor and reconsider." "You..." "You almost had me fooled there for a minute." "Eh?" "The real estate pitch in Southern France is the same as the USA." "Naturally, I do not expect you to take my word." "Find out for yourself." "Uh-huh." "I intend to." "If you'll tell me how to get there." "It is called Mas-de-la-Pousoraco." "Mas-de-la-what?" "Old Provencal, meaning "The Iron Well."" " Take the road to the right." " Uh-huh." "Go about five kilometers." "To your left you will see a well with a fine old wrought iron arch." "That will be it." "Thank you, monsieur." "If you should change your mind, Monsieur Dussard, consult no one else." "The others are all thieves." "So long." "Ah, Monsieur Dussard." "Welcome to the parish of St. Prioust en Pegoustan." " Thank you." " I am Father Sylvain." "Well, I'm very pleased to meet you, Father." "Do they disturb you?" "No, no." "They're just a little unexpected, that's all." "Bon." "I like a man who is fond of children, you see." "Well, actually..." "Children are the hope of mankind, monsieur." "Through them we will conquer greed and cruelty." "This is a vision of mine." "And you will hear more of it as our friendship grows stronger." "I teach them that one's whole life should be a prayer." "Do you agree, monsieur?" " Well, frankly, I..." " Of course, my son." "Forgive me." "You have problems of your own." "There is much to be done here, eh?" "Yes, yes." "It's a question of whether to begin inside or out." "Uh-huh." "Then you intend to stay?" "Yes, I do, Father." "Uh-huh." "May I ask what is your line of business, monsieur?" "Well, if I'm gonna grow olives," "I guess you could call me an olive farmer." "You are married?" "No." "No, I'm not." "Well, that is too bad." "What do you mean?" "I was thinking of the olives, monsieur." "For a single man, they are impossible." "You know, you're the second man today that's told me olives are worthless." "No, I never said "worthless."" "But unless a man has many children, he will not get his olives picked." "He won't?" "The cost of labor, monsieur." "It eats up all the profits." "Oh, I see." "Well, I'll pick 'em myself, then." "Obviously, monsieur, you know nothing about the olives." "Well, they pick 'em off the trees, don't they?" "Oui." "Over in Marseilles, but our trees are different." "When the olives are ripe, the mistral comes and knocks them to the ground." "The mistral?" "Yes, the big wind that blows through here every year at harvest time." "The wind knocks the olives down, then they must be picked up with the thumb and the finger one at a time." "A man's fingers are too rough." "The fingers of a women are better." "But those of the child are best of all." "Marriage would solve your problem, monsieur." "Do you know how long it would take me to raise enough little pickers to pick all these olives?" " I can't wait that long." " You can marry a widow." " Yeah." "I happen to know several." " You're serious, aren't you?" " Oh, oui." "Well, no thanks." "I'll find some other way, if you don't mind." "Maybe the hand of God is in your coming here, monsieur." "I just want to make an honest living." "I will pray to St. Prioust for your success, monsieur." "Thank you." "Come and see me, eh?" "Thank you, I will." "Let's go home." "Let's go home." "So it takes a family, does it?" "Bonjour, Monsieur Dussard." "What are you doing here?" "I'm preparing monsieur's breakfast." "Oh." "Has monsieur slept well?" "Yeah, yeah." "Thank you." "But..." "Oh." "I am Maria Riserau." "We met yesterday in the village." "Yes, I remember." "But I'm still wondering why you're here." "Father Sylvain sent me." "Father..." "Oh, the priest!" "The truth is, monsieur, he asked Mama to come, but she is ill, so I have come instead." "Oh." "Pardon, monsieur." "Breakfast is ready." "Uh-huh." "Bon appetit, monsieur." "Thank you." "Father Sylvain, huh?" "Say..." "You wouldn't happen to be a widow, would you?" "Me?" "No!" "But Mama is." "She has nine children." "She..." "Nine?" "I'm the eldest." "Eat, monsieur." "It becomes cold." "Pardon, monsieur." "Pardon." "Children!" "Children!" "What will monsieur think?" "You are here to work and be useful, not to play and fight." "Children, I introduce you to your new neighbor, Monsieur Dussard." "Monsieur Dussard, these are my brothers and sisters." "Now, children, all together..." "Welcome, Monsieur Dussard, to St. Prioust en Pegoustan." "Well, thank you." "Now, boys, clean up the yard." "Girls, come into the house with me." "Marius, on second thought, you go into the house with Sidoni and the girls." "Yes, but I want to work with the boys." "Ah, ah, no back talk." "Quickly, inside." "Come on." "Go and sweep." "If you would start making the bed it would be marvelous." "Sidoni, come here." "Come and look at the picture!" " I'll take that!" "There we go." "Never mind." " Pardon, monsieur." "Never mind cleaning up in here." "Everybody outside." " But, monsieur..." " No buts." "Out, out, out." "I just don't like people looking around and cleaning up." "That's all." "But I promised Father Sylvain..." "Now, you tell Father Sylvain I appreciate the help, but no thanks." "And you tell him for me that when I need little pickers," "I'll supply my own, my own way." "Thank you." "And it won't have to be by marriage." "Now mademoiselle..." "Au revoir." "Bye-bye." " Bonjour, Maria." " Bonjour, Marcel." "Your order, cherie." "Merci." "How much?" "Forty francs, 70." "You've been avoiding me, Maria." "I've started working again." "Oh..." "How is the American?" "The American?" "Yes." "Your neighbor." "The one whose breakfast you've been serving?" "Where did you hear that?" "Oh, these things get around." "Oh, it happened once." "I haven't seen him since." "Oh, no?" "How could I possibly have seen him?" "He keeps to himself." "And besides, he has been away." "But you do notice that he does keep to himself and that he has been away." "Too much throttle, Maria." "You're flooding it." "Nothing good is ever done in anger." "Let me try." "Meanwhile, you say a prayer to St. Prioust." "When you contemplate his holy anger these little irritations fade away." "You see?" "It's working already." "Oh, I'm sorry, Father." "I've lost your place." "It's nothing Maria." "At my age, I know this book by heart." "How does it go at the perfume factory?" "Very well." "And your new American neighbor?" "Oh!" "I know when to mind my own business, Father." "I'm not the least interested in that man." "And you know, he's not a bachelor like you said." "No?" "He told me he was." "Marius saw pictures of him with his children." "Oh, but they could be his cousins, or perhaps his nieces or nephews." "Then why was he ashamed?" "Ashamed?" "Oui." "He became very angry, and he grabbed the pictures from Marius and he threw us out." "Why would he do that if he is not hiding something?" "Oh, come now, Maria." "He's ashamed, because his children are so ugly." "Maria!" "Marius said they looked just like little monkeys." "Little monkeys?" "Madeline, sit down now, and let me do the driving, all right?" "Here, you look at the road map." "Keep me on the right track." "" " Hey, cool it back there, will ya?" "Why don't you look at the map, like Madeline, here." "Hey!" "Wow." "Cut that out, now, Delphine." "That's not funny." "Sit down, keep your hands to yourself." "That's better." "How're we doing?" "All right, girls." "We're coming into the village now." "I want you to lie down back there." "You too, Madeline." "Come here." "That's good." "Now, stay that way." "Under wraps until the time is ripe." "Improvements?" "What kind of improvements?" "The spare room by the kitchen, for one thing." "He's making it into a nursery." "A nursery?" "Are you certain of this?" "I make it my business to be certain of everything before I speak." "It is a virtue you should acquire." "If it is a nursery, then he must be married." "That does not necessarily follow." "Yes, it does, Emile." "For an American, it does." "Here." "Have one." "Merci." "Did you see?" "It's the American." "He has returned." "All right, stay down now." "Stay down." "You, too, Madeline." "Get down." "Get down." "Come on." "Come on, Madeline, keep up." "Okay, come on in, girls." "There we go." "Now, let's not get carried away." "Let's act like ladies." "Hey, stop chasing Monique around that way." "You two get off the sink, will ya?" "We're not here to play, you know, we're here to work." "Oh, boy." "All right, now, Delphine, you knock that off." "The quicker you settle in, the better it's gonna be for all of us." "Come on, take my hand." "Come on, Celeste." "Come on." "Ah, now this is your room." "Come on, Madeline." "Let's go." "Okay." "Live it up." "I saw them, monsieur." "They are charming." "What are you doing here again for?" "I mean, uh..." "They are your family, monsieur, but why did you not tell me?" "Well, I wanted to keep it a secret." "Why?" "Is it something to be ashamed of?" "No, no, no." "It's just that, uh..." "Let me see them, monsieur, please." "Easy!" "They're not used to strangers." "Take it easy." "They are beautiful." "Where did you get them?" "I picked them up in Marseilles." "Bought 'em from the U.S. Air Force." "The Air Force?" "Uh huh." "Yeah." "They used to be astro-chimps." "I was their trainer." "May I, monsieur?" "I guess so." "Celeste seems to like you." "Celeste?" "Yeah, I gave them all French names since they'll be living here." "That's Delphine, the large one, and Madeline and Monique." "All girls?" "Females are more cooperative than males." "Higher sense of responsibility." "Oh, naturally, monsieur." "It has always been so." "Uh-huh." "But don't get any wrong ideas." "They may be girls, but they're rugged." "For space flight, they had to be." "Space flight?" "You mean, these poor little things were sent up in rockets?" "Don't get excited." "They lost their jobs before they ever made it." "The Air Force is sending up men nowadays." "I'm happy for that." "You will keep them here, monsieur?" "Yeah." "That's the idea." "May I help you with them?" "Oh, no, No." "Thanks." "We'll do fine." "Please, monsieur." "I will be like a mother to them." "You'd just spoil 'em." "Look." "You see how she takes to me already?" "Give 'em too much affection, they'll walk all over you." "But no one ever has too much love, monsieur." "Well, that's true." "Wait a minute, now look, I have put a lot of time and effort into their education." "I'm not about to goof it up." "But monsieur, I would make them the cutest little outfits..." "Now, that is exactly the kind of help I don't want." "These are not dolls you play with." "They're chimpanzees." "As such, they have dignity and they have rights." "I'm not about to let somebody come in and turn them into clowns, or glamour girls, or anything except plain, simple, hard working chimps, you understand?" " Oui, monsieur." " All right." "But, I was just thinking, you know, the sun is very hot, and if they had little bonnets when I take them walking in the village..." "Stop right there." "The village is absolutely out of bounds." "Absolutely." "But why?" "Come here." " Can you keep a secret?" " Oh, but of course." "All right, you're the only one who knows about 'em." " I am?" " Yeah, yeah." "So I'm sort of in your power." "You are what?" "Uh, never mind." "Look..." "I am going to teach these monkeys how to pick olives." " To pick olives?" " Yes." " How clever, monsieur." " Yeah, yeah." "Now look, if I let you help me with the training, will you promise not to tell anybody?" " Oh, yes." "I will not tell a soul." " Okay." "But why must I not tell a soul?" "Well, I don't want kids and sightseers coming up here and fouling up discipline and training." "You understand?" "Oui, monsieur." "All right." "Now don't even tell your own family." "Not even Mama will I tell." "Okay." "It's just yours and mine..." "Our secret." "You and me, huh?" "I'd better be going now." "Oh, monsieur, I've started working again, at the perfume factory, in Grasse." "So I can only come to help you in the evenings, and on weekends." "Will that be all right?" "Only evenings..." "It'll be fine, yes." "Au revoir, monsieur." "Au revoir." "And remember." "Shh." "Shh." "Merci beaucoup, monsieur." "You're welcome." "Monsieur Terradouren." "That is the second stalk of bananas the American has bought this week." "Oui." "What does he do with all those bananas?" "What does he do?" "He eats them." "What else?" "For one man, that is a lot of fruit." "Perhaps he is a vegetarian." "Whatever he is, it is good for business." "A strange man, huh?" "Oui." "Even for an American." "You're certain he's married?" "Ah, I did not say that." "But you did speak of a room for children." "I see." "You are worried about Maria." "Yes." "She's young and innocent." "Her head could be turned by this foreigner." "Something is funny?" "No, no, no." "I was just thinking." "A big red-blooded butcher like you, afraid of a vegetarian." "That is a funny thing." "That is a very, very funny thing." "Maria." "Hey, come on." "Time's a wastin'." "Here we are." "Oh, no." "Aren't they sweet?" "No." "They look ridiculous." "Maria, didn't I tell you they were working chimps?" "Oui, monsieur, but they are girls, and they have feelings." "To a girl appearance is most important." "Especially chimpanzees." "Well, we'll just see about that." "Come on girls..." "We're gonna take up the lesson where we left off yesterday." "Keep in mind rule number one, we do not eat the olives." "Okay, Monique, you're first." "Okay." "Pick 'em up." "Good." "Nice going, Monique, you haven't forgotten a thing, in spite of the silly work clothes." "Here, Monique." "This is for being a good girl." "Okay, Celeste, you're next." "" " Celeste!" "Celeste, come back here!" "Celeste, come down here." "Celeste, I'm getting upset." "Come here." "Watch it, Hank." "Be careful." "Celeste!" "Oh, no." "Hank!" "Hank, cheri." "Cheri." "You're..." "You're hurt." "Hank." "Hank." "Look at me." "Say something." "You and your fancy clothes." "Come on, that's gonna get you nowhere, Celeste." "Come on, back to work." "Oh, no." "Give me those bananas." "You've got to work for these, you know." "Come on." "Come on, you too." "Pick up the olives." "Hello, Father." "Marvelous, Monsieur Dussard." "Simply marvelous." "Now I know what is meant by "American enterprise."" "Do you realize they could revolutionize the entire olive industry?" "Father..." "Can you not see these little ladies in every orchard in Provence?" "Ha!" "What a vision!" "Look, Father..." "This could be the beginning of a great moral regeneration." "Come here, my busy little friend." "Permit me the honor of shaking your hand." "Ah, look, Father." "I know how you feel, but I'm gonna have to ask you to keep this quiet." "Oh, of course." "You anticipate a corner on the olive market." "Eh?" "No, no." "Look, Father." "You see what would happen?" "Hundreds of people would come up here." "Newspaper men, publicity." "First thing you know, the whole world would be looking, and it could ruin everything." "Forgive me, monsieur." "My enthusiasm is my greatest fault." "I must correct it." "I figured you'd understand." "But in time, everyone will know, and should know, yes?" "Yes." "After we've got it down pat and we're in business, fine." "I will keep it to myself, monsieur." "My word." "Au revoir, busy ones." "I will be looking forward to your success." "This is like dressing a centipede." "There we go." "Come on." "Come to bed." "Lie down." "You didn't have to go to all this expense, you know." "It was no expense, monsieur." "These are things my sisters have outgrown." "Yeah. well, I appreciate all the trouble, but I doubt if they do." "You do not think they are happy?" "Well, look at 'em." "Now, do you think they are?" "Monsieur, if they are unhappy, it is not because of their nightgowns." "It is because they are lonely." "Four girl monkeys and not one boy." "Boy?" "Monsieur is heartless." "Maria, if you bring any kind of a distraction in here now, we'd never get any work out of 'em." "Work?" "Money and work, is that all you think about?" " Go to sleep!" " Bonsoir, monsieur." " Don't go away angry." "I'm not angry." "Well, then stop pouting, or whatever it is you women do when you're not agreed with." "I don't know why monsieur should be so upset." "After all, you men are always right." "And will you stop calling me monsieur." "The name's Hank, and I'm not upset." "If you do not want my advice, you may be honest and tell me so." "Hey, don't twist things around that way." "Think it over, monsieur." "Think what over?" "Bonsoir, monsieur." "Hank!" "Right here, do you believe me?" "In our own community, an example of capitalist oppression that would be unbelievable had not our secretary-treasurer seen it with his own two eyes." "The American, madames et monsieurs, who now occupies Mas-de-la-Pousoraco, has imported slaves to undermine the economy of our village." "Henri Dussard has brought in monkeys and trained them to pick olives." "Monsieur Maindou?" "Did you say monkeys, Monsieur Cartucci?" "Monkeys!" "Chimpanzees, to be exact, Monsieur Maindou." "You mean to say these animals pick olives?" "They do!" "That is very clever." "" " It is criminal!" "It is also very funny." "This is not a laughing matter." "These monkeys are about to rob you of your jobs, take the bread out of your mouth, and you laugh." "You are a maker of furniture, Monsieur Maindou." "How would you like to see monkeys in your workshop making tables and chairs?" "That would be something, monsieur." "But I doubt if they could do the fine work." "This is nothing to be made light of." "We are confronted with creeping capitalism." "I propose we stop it here and now, once and for all." "Do I hear any suggestions?" "So once again you leave the thinking to your leaders, huh?" "Good." "We have not let you down." "Our secretary will present a plan of action." "Resolve..." "That we alert the village against the Yankee imperialist by a series of slogans." "I second the motion." "All in favor say "aye." All against say "nay."" "Carried unanimously." "Next order of business, Monsieur Secretary." "We will need slogan painters." "Who will volunteer?" "I would consider it an honor, Monsieur Secretary." "You see what the godless propagandists have done." "It's all over town." "The same thing." "Who told them about my monkeys?" "Who knows?" "Their spies are everywhere." "Well, why do they pick on me?" "Well, they've run out of causes." "Causes?" "Without causes, they have no need for slogans." "Without slogans, they fade away and they are forgotten." "You and your monkeys came just in time." "Yeah, well, who's the guy I'd like to punch in the nose?" "Oh, it's no secret that our butcher is the local leader." "Oh." "Oh, but he is a formidable man." "Stay out of this." "This is my fight." "No, no, no." "I will come with you." "Ah, the Yankee imperialist." "Are you responsible for those slogans all over town?" "The result of public indignity." "A spontaneous group action." "Naturally, I played my part." "What have you got against chimpanzees?" "I have nothing against chimpanzees." "I love chimpanzees." "But not when you train them to pick olives." "Where did you hear that?" "We are intelligent and resourceful." "If there is injustice... (SNIFFS)" "We smell it out." "So go back to America and take your slave labor with you." "Slave..." "This guy's out of his mind!" "Listen, Marcel, since the beginning of time, man has been using animals to ease his burden." "Yeah, that's right." "Like the horse and the chicken and the cow." "How about that?" "Man has trained those animals for tasks he cannot do himself." "Can you pull a wagon, or give milk?" "Can you lay an egg?" "Yeah, well, I..." "The Bible says God created the animals for..." "Don't try to confuse us with theology." "When you train monkeys to do a man's work you create unemployment." "What will become of us when your monkey army takes over?" " Answer me that!" " Monkey..." "By that time, you'll be hanging in the deep freeze and pigs'll be running this butcher shop." "That's a stupid statement." "No more stupid than saying we make a horse pull a cart because a man can't." "That's not stupid, that's a fact!" "A-ha!" "Then a horse is putting six men out of work, because six men could very easily pull a wagon." "Ha ha." "There you are!" "Now he wants to harness men to carts." "What?" "You have given us a challenge, Dussard." "A challenge we cannot ignore." "Monsieur." "Oh!" "Monsieur." "Is something wrong?" ""Is something wrong," she says." "Where are your eyes?" "It's all over the village." "Everybody knows about his monkeys." " Oh, and you think I told?" " Who else?" "If Father didn't, than who else?" "No one else knew the secret." "But I did not tell anyone." "Not even your butcher boyfriend, huh?" "Why do you say that?" "Oh, don't give me the sweet and innocent." "I saw you the first day I got to this town." "You were..." "You were in there kissing him." " It is not true." " I saw it." "I mean, you do not understand." "What's to understand?" "And who cares, anyway?" "That's right." "Who cares?" "Who could possibly care about such a stupid man like you?" "I don't want to see you again." "You or your monkeys, ever." "I did not think you were the kind to run from a fight." "I'm not running." " No?" " No." "I'm gonna go home, collect my thoughts and find out where I stand." "You stand in the dead center of local politics, like a target." "What you need is the advice of an expert." "You?" "Oh, I am an amateur." "No." "I suggest that we ally our forces and consult a professional." "Monsieur Gaston Lou, the mayor of St. Prioust." "Let's go." "But could you not, Monsieur le Maire, officially have these slogans painted out?" "If I do that they will accuse me of destroying the freedom of the press." "I was elected, you see, by all shades of opinion." "And I respect the right of everyone to his own beliefs." "Well, I appreciate your point, Mr. Mayor, but involving my chimps in politics is going too far." "But what of the law that forbids the defacing of public property?" "I would rather not invoke it, Father." "But as one who has faith in the democratic processes," "I believe that every man has the right to express his opinions in the same way as his opponent." "Even you, monsieur." "Must I speak any plainer?" "Mr. Mayor, you are a very smart man." "A modern Solomon." "Common sense, nothing more." "Let's go, Father." "A pleasure, Mr. Mayor." "The same, Monsieur Dussard." "Monsieur le Maire." "When do we march?" "How about daybreak tomorrow?" "Of course." "The dawn attack has always been in the grand military tradition." "Right." " The classic tactic of surprise." " Uh-huh." "Until dawn then, au revoir." "Au revoir." "Whose side are you on, Monsieur Cartucci?" "Marcel!" "Stop playing with monkeys and help me!" "Thank you." " Bonjour, Monsieur Dussard." " Bonjour, Sidoni." "Madames, mademoiselles, monsieurs." "The festival of St. Prioust has now begun." "There will be music, singing, dancing, games, and refreshments." "And as we do every year, we begin our entertainment with folk songs by Father Sylvain and his choristers." "We will begin with my favorite song from which I have prepared English words for our new American neighbor, Monsieur Henri Dussard." "Joie, joie, joie de vivre Money cannot buy" "Joy, joy The joy of living" "Doesn't cost a sou" "Long long long ago I heard my father singing singing so happily while harvesting the hay" "How large is this our galaxy" "How small a speck our earth" "And how much smaller mortal we our troubles they must trivial be" "Long years have come and gone" "And yet this song keeps ringing" "Bringing my heart away from worry and dismay" "How large is this our galaxy" "How small a speck our earth" "And how much smaller mortal we our troubles they must trivial be" "Joie, joie, joie de vivre Money cannot buy" "Joy, joy The joy of living" "Doesn't cost a sou" "No, no, no It doesn't cost a sou so when your heart is heavy" "And your cares are many" "Just try to count the stars" "And poof!" "Your cares are few" "our troubles they must trivial be" "Joie, joie, joie de vivre Money cannot buy" "Joy, joy The joy of living" "Doesn't cost a sou so when your heart is heavy" "And your cares are many" "Just try to count the stars" "And poof!" "Your cares are few" "How large is this our galaxy" "How small a speck our earth" "And how much smaller mortal we our troubles they must trivial be" "How large is this our galaxy" "How small a speck our earth" "And how much smaller mortal we our troubles they must trivial be" "How large is this our galaxy" "How small a speck our earth" "And how much smaller mortal we our troubles" "They must trivial" "Be" "Give me another one." "Thank you." "Uh, Monsieur Dussard?" "What?" "Permit me to introduce myself." "Piastillio, the olive miller." "Oh, hi." "Pleased to meet you." "Uh, may I buy you a glass of wine?" "No, no." "Thanks." "Er..." "I understand you expect a good year in olives, monsieur?" "Yeah." "Yeah, I'll do okay." "You seem confident of your monkeys." "I am." "But you've solved only half your problem." "Now you must sell your olives." "Oh. oh, I see." "You want to talk a deal?" "I already have a very tempting offer." "Ten francs a measure for all olives." "Well, that sounds fair." "Count me in." "Uh, you did not let me finish, monsieur." "There is a condition." "This price has been offered to me by leaders of..." "A certain political party." "Provided I do not buy olives picked by monkeys." "Would you say that again?" "If I buy monkey-picked olives at any price," "I will lose this deal." "Politics is something I usually avoid, monsieur, but..." "After all, business is business." "Well, those dirty..." "All right, you won't deal with me, I'll go someplace else." "Spare yourself the trouble, monsieur." "We millers have a gentlemen's agreement not to raid the district of another." "You mean I'm bucking a monopoly?" "I am sorry, monsieur." "But you cannot fight the system." "Take my advice." "Sell out!" "Go back to America." "Au revoir, monsieur." "Wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "Suppose I, uh..." "Give you my olives for five francs a measure." "How many trees?" "Four-hundred and eighty." "Four-hundred and eighty trees against several thousand?" "Even at five that is absurd." "Okay..." "Okay." "But suppose I guarantee to deliver every olive in the district..." "Including those owned by politicians..." "Monsieur, if you can perform this miracle, with or without monkeys, you have a deal." "Don't go away!" "Are you sure this will work?" "Father, have you no faith in human greed?" "Alas, my friend," "all too much!" " Then announce the good news!" "Madames, monsieurs..." "I have an important announcement to make to all resident owners of olive trees." "A business proposition from our American friend," "Henri Dussard." "His four chimpanzees, who can pick better than 10 measures an hour..." "Are at the disposal, free of charge, of all who want their crops harvested." "The olives will be purchased by Monsieur Piastillio." "At five francs a measure." "What?" "All who wish to take advantage of this offer may sign up at the rectory." "This is a trick!" "It's impossible." "Oh, if Monsieur Dussard says it can be done..." "Then I believe him." "Five francs a measure is nothing." "I can get you 10!" "Including the cost of labor?" "Labor comes to five!" "That still leaves you a net profit of five!" "Labor comes to eight, my friend." "And it is only a profit of two francs." "Unless, of course, you choose to pick your olives yourselves." "Now..." "Now..." "What do you say?" "You've heard both offers." "Anyone would be an idiot to turn down such a deal." "I have 250 trees and I will go with Dussard." "Oui, oui!" "And I have 100 trees!" "Gregoire." "Tartarin." "Maindou." " It worked!" " Thank you, Father." "Oh, good." "Are you blind to reason?" "Do you think you'll see even one franc of profit?" "This is a fraud!" "A shameless exploitation!" "As your chairman I forbid you to use monkey labor!" "Listen to your leaders before it is too late!" "Before the American robs you of everything you own." "Relax." "Uh, everything's going to be okay." "Merci, monsieur." "Merci." "So long." "Hello, monsieur." "Oh, hi." "That was a wonderful thing to do, monsieur." "Mmm?" "Offering your monkeys to pick olives." "Oh." "Oh, yeah!" "That." "It was a very patriotic thing, monsieur." "Yeah, well, I lost my head." "You know, I could have probably rented those monkeys out and made a small fortune." "That's just what I mean." "It was a most unselfish gesture." "How are the monkeys?" "Oh, fine." "Fine." "You know, I've missed them." "Well they've, uh, missed you, too." "Did you leave them home alone?" "Yeah, the door's locked." "Prowlers can't get in." "They can't get out." "Well, I'm sure monsieur knows best." "Hank." "Monsieur Hank." "Would you not like to dance?" "Yeah, why not." "Bonsoir, Maria." "Bonsoir, Henri." " Bonsoir, Father." " Enjoy yourself." " It's past my bedtime, now." " Sleep well." " Good night." " Good night." "Bonsoir, Marcel." " Where have you been?" " To Cannes." "The world falls apart and you are enjoying yourself in the playground of the rich." "I was in Cannes for business, Marcel." "Now calm yourself and tell me what's wrong." "Piastillio betrayed us." "He made a deal with the monkeys." "Ah, then it was too bad that I was away!" "Even you couldn't have prevailed against five francs a measure." "Now, now, my friend." "All is not yet lost." "While you were letting things get out of hand," "I was making certain arrangements." "Certain legal arrangements that will pluck this American from our beloved soil from the roots and destroy him forever." "Is something wrong?" "My lights are on." "Could've sworn I turned them off." "Let's go see the monkeys." "Oh, no, no." "It's too late." "Hey, come back here!" " Where are you going?" " To see the monkeys!" "Oh, no you're not!" "Look, your mother will be worried, it's after midnight." "Mama is asleep, so how can she worry?" "Come on." "No!" "Please?" "I said no!" "Why did you kiss me?" "When a man kisses a woman, does it not mean something?" "Yeah." "I'm a man and you're a woman." "Is that all it means to you?" "Oh, that." "You do not like me?" "That's my trouble, Maria." "I like you too much." "Hank, cheri!" "Now hold on..." "Hold on." "I frighten you, yes?" "Yes, in a way you do." "Now, wait." "Maria, wait a minute." "Now, wait, wait." "Listen to me." "We can't go running into things," "you know?" " No!" "No, I mean this takes thought and plans." "You are so thoughtful and so intelligent." "Yeah." "Maria, a couple like us has got to be awful darn sure." "You know, I don't care what Father Sylvain says." "Father Sylvain?" "Yeah, you know." "How he's always talking, not good for a man to be alone, things like that." "Well, it's just not for me right now." "You understand, don't you, Maria?" "I'm trying to, monsieur." "Look, Maria, you're a beautiful girl." "You're fun to be with..." "Marriage is just not for me." "Not..." "Right now." "That's very considerate of you to be so honest with me, monsieur." "Well, I think it's only fair, that, uh..." "A guy lets a know where she stands..." "I mean where he stands." "Forgive me if I've been forcing myself upon you." " Maria!" " Bonsoir, monsieur." "Look, wait a minute." "I didn't mean to say anything wrong." "It's of no importance." "Look, Maria, why is it that we end up this way all of the time?" "Why do you always have to talk so much and be so..." "Honest?" "Maria!" "Hello." "You are Henri Dussard?" "Yeah." "I am Yolande Angelli, your cousin." "My cousin?" "Oui, monsieur." "There is no one else, monsieur, only me." "Oh..." "Would you mind if I join you?" "Please." "You will need it." " I will?" " I'm going to live here with you." "Your Uncle Antan was also my Uncle Antan." "So, half of this property is mine." "What did you say your name was?" "Yolande Angelli." "I don't remember any Angelli's in the family." "Nevertheless I am your cousin, on your mother's side." "And the law of France says that, uh..." "Read it for yourself, monsieur." "Oh, Emile Paraulis, huh?" " You know him?" " Yes, slightly." "This his doing?" "You might say that." "As a friend, he's looking out for my interests." " Oh." "(YAWNS) Where do I sleep?" "Sleep?" "Yes, where is my room?" "Uh, take my bedroom." "Where will you sleep?" "I'm not sleepy." "I mean I'm going to stay out here and think." "I do not wish to put monsieur out." "Perhaps I could use that room off the kitchen." "No!" "I mean, no, no, you can't use that room, it's an old store room." "Wouldn't do at all." "You are lying, monsieur." "What?" "Something is in there." "That's what I said." "It's a store room." "A store room for what?" "Well for..." "Things, what else?" "I've heard noises." " No." " People moving around, whispering." " Go on." " Are those your slaves?" "My slaves?" "Monsieur Paraulis said you were keeping slaves like animals, or animals like slaves, or something." "As your cousin, I have a right to know." "Now look, you're all mixed up." "I do not keep slaves!" "You are not living here alone, monsieur." "Be honest with me." "Who is locked up in there?" "There is nobody locked up in there!" "We're the only two people in the house, you and me." "Don't talk to me about honesty." "I'm honest to a fault." "I lose all my friends that way." "Now shut up and go to bed." "Bonsoir, monsieur." "Oh, boy." "Hank..." "I'm sorry." "I had no right to lose my temper." "Father Sylvain says it's not good to let the sun go down upon your..." "Your anger." "Who is this?" "Um..." "This is my neighbor." "Neighbor, Maria, meet, uh..." "My cousin." "Look, I know what you're thinking and you're wrong!" "You don't have to explain it to me, monsieur." "I do not care." "" " Tell her." " Tell her what?" "Tell her who you are and what you're doing here." "Oh, that!" "Dry your tears, cherie." "As cousin, half of this property is mine!" "So, here I am!" "Is it true?" "Well, you heard her, it's all spelled out right here." "I am sorry about this, cherie, but of course it is always better to know the truth before marriage." "Is it not so?" " I'll walk you home." " You needn't bother." "Now let's not start that again, I'm walking you home." "Here, hold this." "Maria..." "Maria!" "Wait a minute." "I need your help." "Why don't you ask your cousin to help you?" "Now, you listen to me." "I didn't invite her here." "She was sent by Paraulis." "Don't you see it's another scheme to stop my monkeys?" " But then she's not your cousin." " I don't know who she is." "Believe me." "I believe you, Hank." "Good." "Right now I'm worried about the monkeys." "The olives are ripe, the big wind's due any day..." "If Paraulis can legally tie up my estate," "I may never get anybody's olives picked, including my own." "It could wipe me out." "Does she know about the monkeys?" "No, I don't think so." "Then we better get them out of the house before she does see them!" "Yeah, I know." "The problem is where to keep them." "We have a big, empty barn." "That's good." "No, wait a minute!" "Let's wait til she's asleep, come here." "Hank..." "Come on." "Oh, wait a moment, I will light the lantern." "At ease." "Come on." "Hey, come back here!" "Oh, let them play." "Enjoy their new home." "Madeline, leave those chickens..." "Madeline!" "Are you sure..." "Are you sure your mother won't mind us keeping them here?" "Oh, but of course not." "Mama loves animals." "Yeah, uh-huh." "I'm glad to hear that." "Oh, God!" "Okay." "That does it!" "Everybody up in the hay loft and stay put!" "Come on!" "Come on." "Come on." "All right." "You too, Celeste." "Go on." "All right, settle down up there and go to sleep!" "You see they like it." "They will be happy here." "Yeah, but first we've got to get rid of these lethal weapons." "Oh, Maria..." "I appreciate you doing this." "Anything to save the monkeys, monsieur." "Hank." "Hank." "What in..." "Bonjour, mademoiselle." "Bonjour, looking for Dussard?" " Oui." " He left before I got up." "Shall I tell him you called?" "No, merci." "It's of no importance." "Cherie, come in." "Please, I would like to talk to you." "All right, but I cannot stay long." "Please." "Would you like some coffee?" "No, merci." "You are the fiance of Monsieur Dussard, yes?" "I am his fiance, no." "Oh." "Then you can speak frankly." "What kind of man is this Dussard?" "What kind of man?" "Is there not something strange about him?" "He is a bachelor and he lives by himself." "That is strange?" "He may be a bachelor, cherie, but he does not live by himself." "No?" "What of the room with the bars in the window?" "Oh, that..." "That is not for me to say." "It is bad?" "Bad, mademoiselle?" "I heard sounds last night." "Like whispering and thumping and the patter of feet..." "I got up to look..." "Poof!" "Nothing!" "So?" "Is this place haunted?" "Do you believe in ghosts?" "Certainly not." "But..." "Why do you ask?" "Mmm-hmm..." "What's this "Mmm-hmm?"" "You do not know about your uncle Antan?" "What about him?" "But you are family, you must have heard!" "We were never a very close family." "What is it I should know?" "Well..." "You will promise not to tell who told you?" "I will swear to it." "Monsieur Paraulis has secured very clever legal advice." "All I know is that if she gets half of my property," "I might as well quit right now." "No, no, no, Henri." "Let us not be hasty." "After all, you still have your monkeys." "Well, not according to this..." "I don't." "She gets half of everything!" " Is it true?" "oui, mon pere." "Unless the monsieur can prove he did not use inherited property with which to buy his monkeys." "Can you, monsieur?" "No, of course I can't." "That's exactly how I bought 'em." "I mortgaged the property." "This is possibly a complete fraud." "I suggest you retain a lawyer and fight it." "And pay him with what?" "Half a failing farm?" "Mr. Mayor, it's been nice knowing you." "Father..." "No, you're not leaving." "Yup." "I don't belong here." "That is not true!" "You cannot leave us now." "Sorry, Father." "Henri, wait." "Henri." "Henri!" "Henri, you..." "You should reconsider." "Father, I know when I'm beat." "Oh, Maria." "I'm glad you've come." "Come, do something, Maria." "Henri's leaving us!" "" " Leaving?" " Yeah, yeah, I'm..." "Getting out with my monkeys while there's still time." "We're going to join the circus and see the world." "I tried to reason with him, but it's of no use." "You can't leave us now!" "Maria..." "I..." "I'll drop by for the monkeys." "Now, now, child..." "If it is God's will then we must resign to it." "Is it really true that whatever happens is God's will?" "Most certainly." "Then, uh..." "If I make something happen, uh, that is the way God must have willed it to be, yes?" "Yes." "Well, I mean to say..." "Et voilà!" "Monsieur, voilà." "Hello, cousin?" "Oh, no!" "Yeah?" "Oh!" "You are here, cousin?" "I'm happy you have returned." "When I am here alone without you I am frightened!" " You're gassed." " Gassed?" "Stoned." "Potted." "You have been drinking." "I have been fighting evil spirits with spirits." "The traditional weapon, they tell me, is holy water." "Oui, for saints, perhaps." "But your poor cousin is no saint." "I don't doubt it for a minute." "So I must fight spirits with spirits." "Will you join me in battle, cheri?" "No thanks." "You are going someplace?" "Yup." "It's all yours!" "This magnificent mansion, those profitable olives and these fertile fields." "All yours!" "You are leaving me?" "I am leaving you." "Oh, monsieur!" "Monsieur!" "Please, do not leave me!" "Oh, come back, my cousin!" "You're all I have!" "Oh, but, please..." "Do not leave me here alone!" "I'm frightened!" "Lock your doors and windows and count your blessings." "But that does not help, monsieur." "Monsieur, listen to me!" "The ghosts are here, inside the house." "Not outside." "The ghosts?" "Oui." "The four dead wives of Uncle Antan." "They are haunting this place." "Four wives?" "Oui!" "No kidding." "Uncle Antan had four wives?" " Have you not heard?" " No!" "You do not know why there's that little room with bars on the window?" "Oh..." "Uh, no." "Why is that little room with bars on the windows?" "That's where Uncle Antan tortured his poor little wives before he murdered them and threw them down the well." "Good heavens!" "I know this to be true, monsieur, because" "I heard them last night." "No!" "Oui, I heard them moaning and crying and clawing at the walls!" "It was terrible." "My, my, my, my, my..." "Hey!" "Celeste?" "Monique!" "Hey, girls!" "Delphine?" "Monsieur Hank!" "Oh, Mrs. Risereau." "Say, where are my chimps?" "Maria took them for a walk, monsieur." "For a walk?" "This time of night?" "Where'd she go?" "She did not say, monsieur." "Would you care to wait inside?" "What?" "Oh, no." "No." "Thank you, Mrs. Risereau." "I think I'll look around, see if I can find her." "What's going on?" "Your cousin just left." "Well, I saw her..." "I didn't know..." "What did you do to her?" "I did nothing to her." "I just brought the monkeys here, that is all." "It is their home." "They have as much right to be here as she does." "Is it not so?" "You know something?" "Oui, monsieur?" " Hank." " Yes, Hank?" "You're a devil!" "Yes, Hank." "A shrewd, cunning, insidious, but very beautiful, devil." "Hank..." "Maria..." "Yes?" "Come here." "Father, help me!" "What is it?" "What's wrong?" "I have sinned." "The devils have come to claim me." "I have much to confess." "Help me, please!" "Come." "Come now, my child." "Bonjour, Father." "Bonjour, Henri." " Did you bring it?" " Yes, yes." "I've got it right here." "Say, I hope you don't mind." "I kind of hate to leave them alone anymore." "Not at all." "Come with me." "This is the moment I've been waiting for." "Two of my usuals, Monsieur Fontanino." "A nice and refreshing aperitif." "You will like it." "How does it go with you, Marcel?" "It goes well with me, priest." "And you?" "Very well, thank you." "Very well indeed." "Uh, Monsieur Paraulis is not here today?" "He will be along." "I propose a toast, Marcel." "To all honest men everywhere in the world!" "Do you not agree?" "To all honest men." "However, Marcel, if I do not always agree with what you believe," "I do respect your belief." "Provided it is honest." "Do you follow?" "Do you think of yourself as an honest man, priest?" "I pray daily for the virtue of honesty." "Do you?" "Hmm..." "I do not pray." "But you are honest?" "I try to be." "Did you know that Yolande Angelli, the alleged cousin of Monsieur Dussard, has admitted to me that she is an imposter?" "She has asked me to make a public apology to the entire village for conspiring with Monsieur Paraulis to rob Monsieur Dussard of his property." "You lie!" "You dare to call me a liar before these witnesses?" "When you are guilty of fraud, theft and bribery?" "That's not true!" "Paraulis told me that girl had a legitimate claim." "I'm an honest man." "I'm not ashamed of what I believe." "And I'm not a liar, or a thief!" "Then you are a fool, Marcel." "A stupid tool, for a sly and cunning man." "Talk is cheap." "Where is your proof?" "Show him the proof, Henri." "The olive miller gave this to me." "It's a contract, drawn up by Paraulis..." "In it, he states the terms and conditions whereby he, Paraulis, will deliver olives picked by monkeys." "Your monkeys, monsieur?" "My monkeys." "After he got legal title to them." "The fraud is now obvious, of course." "Paraulis never told me this!" "Speaking of the devil, I see he's about to join us." "You might ask him to explain these things to you, Marcel." "Bonjour, Marcel." "What a beautiful day for this time of the year." "Unusual for this season, isn't it?" "Almost like the calm before the storm." "But, Marcel, what on the earth are you..." "Please, monsieur!" "My produce!" "Idiot!" "Where are you going, imbecile?" "Imbecile?" "Maindou, you stupid idiot!" "My fruit!" "Go and fight outside!" "Go on, out!" "The monkeys!" "Oh, this is getting out of hand!" "My fruits and my vegetables!" "My fruit!" "My fruit!" "Oh, my fruit!" "My vegetables!" "Oh, my fruit!" "Stop!" "That's one." "Stop this disgraceful behavior!" "Two." "Stop it!" "Get out of here!" "No fighting here, you will break something!" "Come here, Delphine." "Coward!" "Villain!" "Stand up and fight like a man!" "Madeline, put that down!" "Ooh!" "Bet that hurt." "Three." "Four!" "Oh, no!" "Fellow citizens of France..." "Bravo, Monsieur le Maire." "Bravo." "Fellow Frenchmen..." "Oh, my window!" "My meat!" "No, Father." "No!" "Spare me!" "Have mercy!" "I have seen the light!" "First things first." "Wait for me in the house of the Lord." "Is this the way you settle a dispute?" "This olive branch is a symbol of peace." "Must I break your head with it to make you act like Christians?" "Your hat, Father." "The mistral!" "Henri!" "Henri!" " What?" " The olives will be falling!" "It's time to pick olives!" "(CHANTING) We want monkeys!" "We want monkeys!" "We want monkeys!" "We want monkeys!" "We want monkeys!" "We want monkeys!" "All right, folks, let them through." "Give them room." "Let's go, Delphine." "Come on, Celeste." "That's it." "Henri!" "May the good Lord bless your venture, Henri." "Thank you, Father." "Say, I've been looking for Maria." "Do you know where she is?" "Oh, she left for Grasse early this morning." "A kind of errand or something." "This is the big day." "She was looking forward to it." "Well, the olives won't wait." "I've got to get to work." "Coming through, please." "Coming through." "Okay, girls." "Go to work." "That a girl, Celeste." "Hank, darling!" "You're just in time, look!" " I have a surprise for you." " It'll have to wait." "Look!" "Oh, no!" "Isn't he marvelous?" "The girls in the perfume factory helped me raise the money to buy him." "Look, they're happy already." "They're slap-happy!" "Get back to work." "Madeline, pick the olives!" "Celeste." "The olives, pick them up." "Delphine, come here." "Pick up the olives." "Get him out of here." "But, Hank!" "Maria, get him behind the house." "First the work, then the amenities, okay?" "Okay, okay." "Rene, will you please take the truck around the back?" "Go, go!" "Monique." "Celeste." "Come back!" "Who among you thinks of himself as a good neighbor?" "If you do, then consider, for a moment, your neighbor, the American." "He staked his fortune and his reputation on this venture and lost," "through no fault of his own." "Have you already forgotten?" "He offered to share his monkeys with you free of charge." "And is this the way you repay a kindness?" "With jeers and scornful laughter?" "I say, the least we can do for this good neighbor..." "Is help him harvest his olive crop." "Right?" "" " Right!" "" " Come on now!" "Father?" "Father, thank you." "Oh, don't thank me." "Thank God and his obvious lessons." "Man does not live by bread alone." "Or by the labor of monkeys." "This year you are lucky, yes?" "But what about the future?" "Maria?" "Oui?" "Like he said, what about the future?" "Oui, Hank." "What about it?" "Look, there's something I want to ask you." " Oui..." " Something I put off long enough." "Oui!" "Hey, did you hear what I said?" "Oui, darling." "But there's no time to talk about it now." "We must pick our olives." ""Our olives?""