"My young friends, you're among the best and brightest in the land, but are you willing to obey and go?" "Are you willing to head the call?" "It matters not the field of service." "What matters is your willingness to obey the Lord's command as found in Isaiah chapter six." "Are you willing to take your talents and place them on the alter and say," ""Here am I, Lord." "Send me."" "It was a terribly painful moment, more painful than I care to remember." "I felt I had nothing to offer God but a string of failures." "What could He possibly want from me?" "The answer to that question will probably surprise you because there's a strength that can come from weakness." "There's a strength that lies hidden in failure." "You might not think so, but there is." "I'm living proof." "Uh, where's ma?" "She's up at the hill with your dad." "They're about ready to move the house." "They are?" "Don't go gettin' any fancy ideas." "Your mom said you need to stay here and do your chores." "Chores is done!" "Josh, come back here!" "I had known for a while they were going to move the house but I didn't know exactly when, and I was so excited." "How were they going to do it?" "I was just a kid, what did I know?" "Was a helicopter going to come down from the sky, or airplanes fly over to lift the house up and take it away?" "This house belongs to me and it's stayin' here!" "Now I want you boys off'a my property!" "Keep working." "Ain't you gonna do something?" "!" "I want these men off'a my property!" " I'm sorry, Wllmot." "According to this court order that house now belongs to Junior and he can move it if he has a mind to." "I built that house!" " And promised it to your son." "The hell I did!" " You were too drunk to remember!" "I have witnesses." "Come on, we're taking those bushes." "You ain't taking no bushes, Junior!" "Get!" "Get on out of here!" "I had no idea of the conflict unfolding that morning." "I just figured the crowd I saw at the top of the hill meant we were going to have some kind of celebration." "But instead of a party," "I came face-to-face with the misery and dysfunction of my family played out in front of all of our neighbors and so-called friends." "They had turned out to support my brother, Junior, against our parents." "It was completely shameful and embarrassing and something inside me just broke me that day." "I blanked out at that moment." "My mind went numb." "I think emotionally I snapped because I can't remember what happened over the next several minutes" "But my last conscious thought..." "I remember running down the hill in front of everyone just crying and screaming." "They're all lies!" "If you cared, you wouldn't do this to me!" "Have you ever felt abandoned?" "I hate you, God!" "I hate you!" "Have you ever felt nobody cares whether you live or die?" "And I hate you dad!" "That's how I felt at eleven years old when I was hiding in the silo." "I felt I had no one to turn to." "I hate you!" "I hate you!" "And I became angry." "I became angry at God if God even existed." "And I damned him." "I called him every name in the book." "And I cursed and damned my father, too, because I felt that he had abandoned me." "My father was an alcoholic." "He was the town drunk." "My mother was so overweight she was practically an invalid." "One of my sisters committed suicide." "My other sister joined the Army just to get away from home." "My oldest brother, Wilmot," "He actually sued my parents in a court of law." "It wasn't a very happy home, and I can remember so often just feeling alone." "Like I was just completely alone." "I was in that cell for about 3 hours, maybe more." "And no one even came to look for me." "Finally, I was just so hungry and thirsty," "I climbed out and went home." "I slammed the door shut on God that day." "In fact, probably one of the greatest hurts was - is that I never ever wanted to go to a friend's house again." "I felt such shame." "I think I just gave up on the notion that love is patient, or kind, or even rejoices in the truth." "And to be honest with you," "I never thought that door would ever open again." "Josh, what are you doing out here?" "You need to start your chores, boy." "Hurry up, now." "All right cows, let's go!" "Come on, go!" "Come on, come on!" "Oh, what, what is that man doing with them cows now?" "It's worse than dealing with a small child." "Him and his liquor!" "What the hell?" "I got chores of my own!" "I've got to come out and do your chores, too, I can see!" "What is going on here?" "Oh, Lord not again." "Wilmot McDowell!" "Are you milking these cows or just trying to kill them?" "I got my own chores to do!" "Do I have to do everything around here?" "All you do around here is getting fatter by the day." " Useless old drunk!" "This cow's milked out right here, this one!" "You can't even take care of a cow for heaven's sake!" "(Edith screaming)" "Got your chores done, Edith?" "Huh?" "!" "I'll kill you!" " No, Josh!" "I'll kill you!" "Do you hear, me?" "!" "I swear you'll pay!" "You'll see!" "Josh!" "Oh, Josh." "Mom." "You can't do it." "You can't do it." "Just go get Wayne." "Mom." "Mom." "He's, he's gonna change, son." "I know he's gonna change." "Just, just go get Wayne." "Just get him." "Crying's not going to do anyone any good," "Josh." "Wayne Bailey was used to my dad hurting my mom." "It's your mother again, ain't it?" "He was used to me asking for his help." "He worked in the house because mom was just too slow and too heavy for most of the household chores." "I suppose he handled that side of things well enough." "It was the other things that he did." "As far as handling my dad was concerned," "I didn't need help from Wayne or anyone else." "When you grow up on a farm," "You learn to do a lot of things as a kid." "You also get pretty strong." "If I knew friends were planning to come by the house, I took matters into my own hands." "Partly to avoid embarrassment from my dad, who was always drunk, and partly to pay him back for what he did to my mom." "Josh, what are you doing?" " Just stay there!" "Josh, what are you doing?" "What are you doing" "Ahhh!" "Josh I didn't mean to." "Josh..." "Josh, I'm your father, Josh." "Jo." "Some father you are." "Now, don't you make a sound." "You hear me?" "!" "Hello Mr. O'Brien." "Hello Mrs. O'Brien." "Howdy, Josh." "Where's your dad?" "He, uh, he had to go into town, but my mom's inside." "She's expecting you." "Thank you, Josh." "Come on in, folks!" "Come on in." "Just in here taking the chicken out of the oven." "Have a seat over there." "I would leave my dad in the barn all night." "I don't know how many times I would do that." "But I would do just about anything to humiliate him." "I can remember watching him go out to hide his wine bottles and then" "I'd go out and urinate in them." "One time the police pulled me off my dad when I was trying to choke him underneath the water in the bathtub." "I hated him so much." "I used to go to the bathroom and then stick his head in the t" "...stick his head in the toilet and flush it." "And as a kid, all I ever wanted was to stop my dad from hurting my mother, and I couldn't do it." "He never retaliated directly." "He could have." "I mean I was still a kid." "I think when he sobered up, even thought he didn't stay sober long, he must have realized what he was doing to my mom and the family." "I think he was ashamed." "I don't know for sure, but life went on." "You got them rolls in there?" "Ah, here we go." "All right, fellas, we got some nice hot rolls for you." "Here we go." "And if you want to start that butter down this side." "And Josh, your father and I have to talk to you after supper." "How are you, my darlings?" "Yes?" "Yes?" "Oh my." "Yes." "Beautiful." "I have something for you." "I want you to obey Wayne." "No excuses." "How long will you be gone?" "Well, I don't know, a week maybe." "Ten days at the most." "That's a long time." "What ails you, son?" "Your dad and I have made trips like this before." "Wayne knows how to take good care of you." "You just do what he says." "Why don't I come with you?" "I came with you once before." " Joslin David McDowell, I came with you once before." "You cannot go with us." "You're starting school next week!" "And I want you to listen to me." "When I get home, I am going to ask Wayne how you behaved and if I hear you didn't listen to him, I'm going to give you a good thrashing." "Do you understand me?" " Yes, ma'am." "a good thrashing." "Do you understand me?" "Oh, all right." "Well, now you go onto bed." "I need to see if Wayne washed those dishes." "How long will you be gone?" "A week maybe, ten days at the most." "That's a long time." "(Radio) Presenting Superman!" "Up in the sky!" "Look!" "It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "It's Superman!" "It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "It's Superman!" "Josh." "It's a bird!" "It's a plane!" "It's Superman!" "Relax." "Relax, Josh." "Just relax." "It's all right." "Josh." "Stay with me." "Yeah, it's all right." "You know how you like this." "Twice I tried to tell my mother, but she wouldn't believe me." "You know, back then people didn't talk about these things, or at least they weren't supposed to exist." "But Wayne Bailey severely abused me sexually from about 6 to 13 years of age." "If you ever touch me again, I'll kill you, you understand me?" "!" "He must have stayed another two or three years." "Then he left." "He knew I had a temper, and I would've killed him." "As I grew older, sports became a vital outlet for me, especially football and basketball." "Every once in a while, my mother came to one of my games, but she never saw me play." "All she ever did was sit in the car and cry because she was too heavy to sit in the bleachers." "(Edith crying)" "Where is he?" "Where is he?" "!" "No, Josh, don't, don't." "Just - just let it go." "There's only one thing I want before I die." "Die?" "What are you talking about, mom?" "I just " "I just want to see you graduate from high school." "Mom, I'll be out in two months." "You know that." "Well I, I know son." "Jo" " Josh, you have to promise me three things." "You got to promise me that you will never ever be an alcoholic," "and you won't swear." "You promise me that you'll be the kind of son that I can be proud of." "Sure, mom." "No promise me, promise me." "I promise." "Just rest now, okay?" "When I graduated from high school," "I joined the Air National Guard with some of my friends." "That was the summer of 1957." "And then, because I couldn't get into basic training at the same time as my buddies," "I joined the regular Air Force." "That allowed me to be with my friends for two weeks of active duty training at Lackland Air Force Base." "When two weeks were over, my friends went back to Michigan, but Airman Josh" "McDowell still had 10 more weeks of basic training and three years and nine months of regular duty; and all that just to be with my friends 2 more weeks." "After basic training," "I was assigned to Dover Air Force Base in Delaware." "Now, on paper I was a mechanic working on" "C-124 aircraft, the big cargo planes, but it seemed like my real job was to play but it seemed like my real job was to play starting guard for the base basketball team." " So yesterday, remember in practice, starting guard for the base basketball team." "We put that play in." "That one play is going to get Josh open for that shot when we need that shot." "That's what we're going to run right now." "We're going to run this pick so that" "Josh can get open." " My first Seargent was really proud of me Josh can get open." "For being a starter on the team." "All right, and you guys popping it out." "Make it pop hard." "Get there, open quick... in a lot of ways." "But I still had to work." "Sometimes things just happen." "Paging Dr. Stateman, Dr. Stateman, please." "Thank you." "You're welcome." "Michael Crawford, 3-4-0, Michael Crawford, please call 3-4-0." "Airman McDowell?" "Yes, sir." "I'm Chaplin Gardiner." "Yes, sir?" "W- what is it?" "It's about your mother." "My mother?" "What about my mother?" "Your mother's dead, son." "I just want to see you graduate from high school... and then, I want to die." "I can't go on, son." "Your father's broken my heart." "Where you going?" "Union City." "Come on, get it in." "They say you can't die of a broken heart," "My father's abuse broke my mother's heart, and she lost the will to live." "I, on the other hand, well, my heart turned hard and I decided to take everything I could get." "I recieved a medical discharge from the Airforce and began making plans for another life." "I mapped out the next 30 years of my life and went to Kellogg Community College, determined to become Governor of Michigan or maybe even U.S. Senator." "It was all about me and who I could use to climb to the top." "I had become a hardened young man, cynical about life." "I found Christians, in particular, worthy of utter disdain." " Grabs the nightstand and throws worthy of utter disdain." "It out the window too!" "Now, the girl's pretty perplexed, you know, but being a pro, she figures he's got some sort of fetish or something like that, so she continues to disrobe." "I think we should change the subject." "Why?" "Those students over there are Christians and so is the professor." "SQ?" "They might be offended." "Well, why would they be offended?" "They probably won't even get the joke." "I mean Christians have two brains, don't they?" "One's lost and the other's out looking for it." "So, you want me to finish the joke?" "I got a better one for you." "A man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he comes across a preacher who's baptizing people in the river." "He walks up to the preacher who smells the alcohol on his breath and says," ""Are you ready to find Jesus?"" "To which the drunk replies, "Sure thing."" "So the preacher grabs him by the neck, dunks him in the river, pulls him up and says, "Have you found Jesus?"" "The drunk spits out some water and says," ""Nope, nope.'"" "So, the preacher is a little shocked." "So he grabs the man by the neck, dunks him in the water again and holds him under a little longer, pulls him up and says," ""For the love of God, my brother, have you found Jesus now?"" "The drunk wipes his eyes, catches his breath and says, "No sir, I can't find him anywhere." "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"" "Like my joke?" "Perhaps you have a better one." "Or maybe a really good story like, uh," "Jonah and the whale?" "Now there's a Whopper." "Or what about Noah and his oceanliner?" "Welcome to our table, Mister..." "McDowell, I believe it is." "That's right, good to be here." "You know, what is it about you Christians?" "What do you mean?" "Well, I mean everyone knows who you are and there's only about a half dozen of you, and uh, plus you and another professor." "And I've been watching you." "Is that so?" "Yeah." "One thing I can't figure out." "What makes you think you're so different from the rest of us?" "Different?" "Yeah, well some of you are good looking," "I'll admit it." "Very good looking." "And, uh, you seem to be happy most of the time." "Maybe you're brainwashed, I don't know, probably are." "We have new lives." "New lives, what, like you're reincarnated or something?" "How do you get a new life?" " Through Jesus Christ." "How do you get a new life?" "Come on, don't give me that garbage!" "Garbage?" "Yeah, the Bible and church, that's just religion." "And if there's one thing I can't stand, it's religion." "Well, I didn't say religion, mister." "I said Jesus Christ." "Jesus Christ, how lame is that?" "We have new lives through Jesus Christ." "Jesus Christ, what?" "Even if he did exist, how could a man who lived 2,000 years ago possibly influence someone's life today?" "Well, I guess that's what you'll need to find out." "What's there to find out?" "Read the Bible and put your faith in fairy tales?" "Come on, Dolly, you can do better than that." "Actually, if you were to disprove the resurrection," "You would fully prove your point." "What?" "The resurrection." "That Jesus Christ physically rose from the grave." "If you were to prove that never happened, you would debunk Christianity." "Prove it to be what you claim it to be, myths and fables." "Now, there's an idea." "I'm quite serious about it, actually." "Yeah?" "Well, so am I." "See where your investigation leads." "Yeah, well nice talking with you." "We look forward to seeing again," "Mr. McDowell." "The name's Josh." "Josh." "And next time, be more prepared." "Prepared?" "You gotta' be kidding me." "I couldn't be more serious." "Yeah, well let's see what I come up with." "And don't get mad at me when I make all of you look foolish." "Not at all." "Well, have a nice day." "You know, I'd ask you to vote for me in the student elections, but, uh, there are so few of you I guess it wouldn't make much of a difference." "I was really determined to prove those students and professors wrong about Christianity." "I kind of wanted to rub it in their faces, if you know what I mean." "The problem for me was I couldn't find enough material at Kellogg College Library to prove my main points." "And funny how these things happen..." "I began to get the idea of going to Europe to study original manuscripts that I knew were housed in some of the libraries over there." "It was early summer 1958." "I had my own money, that wasn't a problem, so I flew to England and just began to read everything I could get my hands on." "I read the works of many well-known skeptics." "I also examined the writings of a smaller group of individuals, all of them proficient in their areas of expertise, who started out as unbelievers and later became Christians." "This intrigued me, and I wanted to find out why." "What led them to change?" "There was Lord Lyttleton, who later became Chancellor of the Exchequer," "Gilbert West, Sir William Ramsey," "Frank Morison, C.S. Lewis... all of them educated successful men" " and skeptics - who became believers after carefully studying the evidence." "On the same trip, I went to Germany," "France and Switzerland." "I'd go into various museums and libraries and look into the glass display cases holding rare books and manuscripts." "I couldn't read Greek or Hebrew, but I knew those manuscripts were real." "And significance of each one." "I made my way back to England, and just a day or two before my return trip to the States, I went to a library on the northeastern edge of London." "It was a small library someone had told me about, and it had several books and manuscripts" "I wanted to study." "By this time, I was tired, really tired." "I remember it was about 6:30 in the evening, and I leaned back in my chair, put my hands behind my head and said out loud," " It's true." ""It's true"" "I said it again" "It's true." "...And again." " It's true!" "...and again." "Shhhh..." "I had started my journey as an obnoxious, agnositic university student who thought Christians were airheads." "I had set out to refute their beliefs and disprove the resurrection." "But after all my research, in spite of my prejudice," "I realized I didn't have a valid defense." "The historical evidence all pointed the other way, and I realized my rejection of the Bible and Christianity was based more on emotion than intellect." "I wasn't ready to become a Christian, but I had to admit there was compelling evidence to consider, evidence that demanded a verdict." "There came one running, and kneeled to him, and asked..." " Back in Michigan, and kneeled to him, and asked..." "I continued my college studies and began attending a small church called" "Factoryville Bible Church." "The Pastor's name was Fay Logan." "He knew what I'd been going through, and one day he prepared a special sermon" "Just for me." "But let's be clear," "God's salvation is not an intellectual exercise." "We are saved by faith and trust in Christ." "So, let me ask you, are you ready to recieve the gift of eternal life that Jesus is offering you right now?" "Do you believe?" "Are you ready to commit?" "Let's review what that commitment will involve." "I acknowledge I am a sinner in need of salvation." "Secondly, I believe in my heart that God did raise Jesus from the dead." "Thirdly, I confess Jesus as my Lord and my God." "I knew I needed to respond, but I couldn't." "I was afraid." "By receiving Christ as Savior and Lord," "I'd be committing intellectual suicide." "I was also afraid of what my friends would say." "I was afraid of what they'd think." "The Holy Spirit welcomes you to come and trust Jesus as your personal" "Lord and Savior." "Who will come?" "And then, thank God, one of those friends leaned over and asked me a question." "Do you want me to go with you?" "People think I became a Christian through the intellectual route." "That's not true." "All the study, all the research, that was God's way of getting my attention and I don't downplay it because without it" "I would never have considered the Bible's message." "Josh, this Bible is for you." "The door I had closed on God as an eleven-year-old, cracked open again and I began to learn that God is love, and he loves me." "That he's passionate about having a relationship with me." "And from that day forward with Pastor Logan's help" "I began to learn about the Christian life." "But it wasn't the evidence that brought me to God." "It was his love." ""I have loved you with an everlasting love;" "with tender kindness I have drawn you."" "That's what God in his mercy did for me." "There he is now." "Josh, this is my girlfriend, Gail." "Nice to meet you." "I did not want to love my father or forgive him." "I wanted to continue to hate him." "I believed he had killed my mother and destroyed our family." "For years, I'd gone to bed at night dreaming up ways to kill him without being caught by the police, and here I was, a new Christian, still determined to hate him." "So..." " Dad, I have something to say to you." "Dad, I love you." "I don't I know who was more in shock, him hearing what I said, or me saying the words." "That's when I knew it was true." "I was used to loving those I loved, but I never had the capacity to love someone I hated." "I hated my father, and now" "I was overcome by love for him." "Christianity was real." " Josh, how is college?" "Christianity was real." "Knowing it was true, however, even knowing that God loved me unconditionally didn't make some things any easier to deal with." "I can't, Pastor." "I just can't." "It goes too deep." "Josh." "If this is Christianity, maybe I should hang it up." "I can't." "I'm sorry, Pastor." "This is just too much to ask." "I'm not asking you, Josh." "No one understands." ""And when they were come to the place which is called Calvary, there they crucified him and the malefactors, one on the right hand and the other on the left." "Then said Jesus, 'Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."'" "Altogether, it was a process of about six months." "And without Pastor Logan's patience and wisdom, I'd never had done it." "Even when I did, I had no emotion about it." "I did it by faith, out of obedience, knowing it was the right thing to do." "I remember hoping I wouldn't be able to find out where he lived." "But I did find out, and I called him up and I told him" "I was coming to see him." "Josh..." "Wayne." "Wayne, what you did to me was evil." "And you know it was evil." "But I've" "I've come to know Christ as my Savior, my Lord." "And I've come here to tell you..." "I've come here to tell you that" "Christ died as much for you as he did for me." "I forgive you, Wayne." "One more thing, Wayne." "Don't let me ever hear of you touching a young man again." "You'll regret it." "In Hebrews, Jesus is accepted..." "Well, the bridge, Josh, I think is love." "It's not a line in the sand." "It's a relationship - a personal relationship." "I like what Martin Luther said," ""God writes the gospel not in the bible alone but also on the trees and the flowers;" "on the clouds and the stars."" "I've been thinking, Josh." "Uh-oh." "I think you need to transfer to Wheaten College." "Wheaten College, where's that?" "Outside Chicago." " Yeah?" "Outside Chicago." " Oh yeah?" "It's where Billy Graham went to school." "Hmm..." "It'll demand a lot out of you academically, but I think you're up to the challenge." "You know, Pastor," "I've been thinking of studying law?" "Really?" "Yeah." "Well, whatever you decide to do," "Wheaten can help you excel." "I, uh..." "At Wheaten, I had time for two things:" "Study and work." "I had a part-time job in the afternoons delivering administrative records for local high schools." "As a result of the accident, the ligaments in my neck were torn loose and my lower back severly injured." "After four days in Intensive Care," "I spent another week and a half in the hospital." "The doctors realized my recovery would be gradual, and they decided" "I should go home to mend." "Ironically, the man who hit me was a drunk driver." "The plan was for me to stay at home where I'd be looked after by a nurse, but the nurse was late the day of my arrival." "My father met the ambulance, instead." "Bring him in here, fellas." "We've got, uh, the furniture out." "Thank you." "About five minutes had passed when my dad entered the room." "He didn't actually walk into the room," "He stood in the doorway." "I couldn't move my head, but I could just make him out through the corner of one eye." "There were two things I noticed right away." "One, he was sober, and the other, he was crying." "I couldn't move any part of my body except my eyes." "He just pace back and forth, no dialogue, nothing." "I just followed him as best I could." "Josh..." "HOW." "How could you ever love a father like me?" "Dad..." "I've learned one thing." "God became man, and his name is Jesus." "Jesus is passionate to have a relationship with you." "He left the room and was gone." "I don't know, maybe forty-five minutes passed." "Then, he came back into the room." "Josh," "If Jesus can do in my life what I've seen him do in yours, then I want to know him." "You need to ask him into your life, dad." "Open your hear to him and pray." "God, if you are God," "My dad just prayed a simple prayer, a farmer's prayer I call it, very down to earth." "All I could do was cry." "Then, please, come in." "When I came to Christ, my life changed over about a period of a year; year and a half." "But when my father made that decision, the change was immediate." "I saw him change right before my eyes." "It was like somebody reached down and turned on a lightbulb in his life." "And you know, only once after that did he ever touch alcohol, and he got it" "All of you remember the way I used to be," "I was the town drunk." "I was an embarrassment to my family." "Tom, you were there on the hill that day when Junior was moving the house;" "stumbling, falling down drunk." "I was an embarrassment." "And you know my wife is gone now," "I can't make it up to her, but I can tell you one thing, and it happened right here in this diner, was when my son, Josh, said to me, "Dad, I love you."" "And those were his exact words," ""Dad, I love you." And that's..." "As a result of my dad's decision to trust Christ, scores of people in our town and the surrounding area came to know" "Jesus Christ as savior and Lord." "All because of the changed life of the town drunk." "I just wish my mother could have seen it." "Fourteen months later, my father died." "Three-fourths of his stomach had to be cut out, his entire liver was destroyed through thirty-some years of drinking." "I was at Wheaten College when I got the news - which brings me back to where our story began." "I had run out of Edman Chapel that evening." ""Who will go?" the chapel speaker had said, quoting the prophet Isaiah." ""Who will make their abilities available to God?" It sure wasn't going to be me, even if I was a student at Wheaten College." "I still had feelings of inferiority," "I still carried the scars of abuse and violence and family brokenness." "Yeah, sure, I might succeed in hiding these things from others, but how could I hide them from myself?" "I remember thinking," ""Well, maybe I should jusk walk away." "Maybe I should leave the faith."" "All I'd ever heard as a Christian was that for his glory." "That created a huge problem for me." "I felt I had nothing to offer God but weakness and failure." "My life story didn't have a fairy tale ending." "And then I did something I thought" "I'd never do." "I stopped and said," "God, all I have are failures" "But if you can take my weaknesses and glorify yourself through them," "I'll serve you with every breath I breathe." "And that's the story, my friend." "That's the story of how God saved me from destruction." "How he chose the foolish and simple things to confound the strong and wise." "The rest, I guess you'd say, is history." "Maybe you can identify with pan of my story." "Alcoholic or drug addicted parents, abuse, or that sense of loneliness where you feel like it wouldn't matter to anyone if you lived or died." "Or that hopelessness that comes from that feeling that" "God just can't forgive me or it's too late." "I want you to understand something, it is never too late." "One of the barriers that I had in ever coming to God might be your problem, too." "It was the image of my earthly father." "You see, people would tell me that your heavenly father loves you, and that didn't bring joy into my life." "That brought pain." "You say, "Why?"" "Because I was not emotionally able to discern and an earthly father." "Growing up to me - fathers hurt." "One thing I had to realize, though, is that Christianity is not a religion," "It's a relationship." "You say, "what's the difference?"" "You see, a religion is men and women trying to work their way to God through good works and religious ritual." "Christianity is God coming to us through his Son Jesus Christ offering us a relationship." "Most people think that I came to Christ because of all the evidence that I've documented in my books." "But none of that brought me to Christ, it only showed me that it was true." "What really brought me to Christ was God's love." "God loved me so much that if I were the only person alive," "Christ would still die for me, and the same is true of you." "You might be saying," ""Josh, I want to know Christ personally." "I want to know that I'm forgiven." "I want to know that if I were to die today where I'd spend eternity."" "And you can." "We come to Christ by faith through prayer, expressing that desire of our heart." "And maybe the prayer that I prayed would help you to express that desire to God right now, to invite Christ into your life." "I don't ask you to bow your heads." "I don't even ask you to close your eyes." "Because years ago, I learned the key to prayer is not in the position of the body, but in the attitude of the heart." "This is a prayer that I prayed:" ""Lord Jesus, I need you." "Thank you for dying on the cross for me." "Forgive me and cleanse me." "Right now, I trust you as Savior and Lord." "Come into my life." "Thank you that I can trust you." "In Christ's Name." "Amen."" "If you just prayed that prayer with me, and you were sincere," "I want you in the next few days to find a follower of Jesus and share with him or her the decision you just made." "And then do something that I did." "Find a Bible, turn to the third Chapter of John, it's in the New Testament," "Matthew, Mark, Luke and John and read John 3, three times." "And then I want to help you grow." "I want to help you see Christ truly change your life from the inside out." "Go to my website, it's josh.org/undaunted." "Josh.org/undaunted" "And I will be able to share with you many things through my site that can help you to see" "God change your life forever." "Thank you so much for letting me be a part of your life."