"ARTIE:" "Previously on Warehouse 13..." "Years ago, I swear you said you were just a simple professor." "You left out the top-secret warehouse full of madcap." "Claudia." "You're the breach." "(IN SING-SONG TONE) Knock, knock." "Your brother Joshua visits you and tells you he's not dead." "He's stuck." "Help me bring him back." "Oh, thanks." "Thanks for not giving up." "Claudia learned a great deal about the Warehouse, which could become problematic." "You know what the options are." "(MAN SPEAKING NATIVE AMERICAN DIALECT)" "And this." "And this." "What artifact did that?" "Or is that the artifact?" "It was created by late, little-known sculptor Walter Burleigh." "And it was stolen late last night from a high-end auction house in New York." "But that's not the issue." "The issue is how this thing was stolen, because..." "JOSHUA: ...why, after I just got back into this world, you're in such a rush to shove me out the door?" "Because I didn't spend half my life trying to save your life so you could surf the net and watch YouTube." "JOSHUA:" "Well, excuse me for trying to catch up on current events and the state of the world for the last 12 years." "Hey, we're working." "We're working right here." "Artie, I'm sorry." "But apparently, I have to find a job." "Don't know exactly what I'm going to put in that little gap in my resume." "Well, hey, what about what got you there in the first place?" "ARTIE:" "You!" "What?" "Don't you have something to do?" "Like stay out of federal prison?" "And aren't you supposed to be writing me a full technical schematic on how you cracked my Warehouse?" "Yeah, buddy, it's upstairs." "It's almost finished." "Well, then, I want you to finish it." "And I want every redirect and every backslash." "Go, now." "And then, after that, you're going into the Warehouse and you're going to rewire what you unwired when you broke in." "I'd like to unwire you." "(FOOTSTEPS POUNDING)" "Ah!" "(DOOR SLAMMING)" "The patter of little feet." "(CHUCKLES)" "All right, so, Artie, somebody boosts an ugly sculpture." "Why does that involve us?" "Okay, what is significant here is how this thing was stolen." "I mean, this theft was impossible." "It was a high-end alarm system and 8-inch-thick walls, sealed vault." "So, one second that sculpture was there, next second gone." "But it's still just a well-executed art theft." "I mean, it doesn't automatically shout "Warehouse," does it?" "Things rarely shout "Warehouse." "" They usually whisper." "Hey, isn't this a little odd?" "That's what they do." "Yeah." "Well, I could be wrong." "I mean, it could be nothing." "But I'm probably not wrong." "Last time I was wrong was 1987, June." "Stop right there." "That." "I want to hear more about that." "Not a chance." "Go." "Okay." "Here we go." "Going." "Go, go, go, go, go." "Hey, Artie." "Yeah?" "Hey, you know I love New York." "A great town." "Yeah." "It is." "So, I was just thinking maybe you guys could kick down some tickets to a show or..." "Well, it depends on the show." "Really?" "No." "Get out of here." "Show." "Think you're gonna have time for a stupid musical." "Or that I'd even pay for it." "Off Broadway's not that expensive." "JACKIE:" "Carruther's Auction House prides itself on security." "This theft has us stumped." "Video surveillance shows nothing." "I'm assuming you use an electronic lock that records all activity." "And it says the door never opened." "Who's selling the piece?" "Private estate." "He decided to auction after he was approached by two interested parties, both with deep pockets." "When is this auction scheduled?" "It was for today." "I hate to ask, but would you mind?" "Oh..." "You know, maybe one of these interested parties hates competition." "Which would mean that said party has an artifact that lets them pull off an impossible heist." "Or the simple answer, an inside job." "She does bear scrutiny." "JACKIE:" "Follow me." "Yes, ma'am." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "She's out of your league." "How do you know what my league is?" "Not that I asked for them, but I've got season tickets." "That's good." "I like that." "PETE:" "So, the thief takes one piece." "Was it the most valuable one in here?" "No." "Far from it." "But there's no accounting for taste." "I don't know." "Some things are just classic." "Pete." "Yeah." "MYKA:" "Can you come here for a second?" "Excuse me." "Hmm?" "Why don't I stay here in the vault, look for anything, you know, Warehouse-y and you go check out those two interested parties?" "Well, wouldn't things go quicker if we just work together?" "Well, not if you're on a date." "Look, this way we can cover twice as much ground and maybe you'll even get done in time to take skirt-girl to a show." "Two interested parties, huh?" "I'll get their info." "Great." "I'll go with." "Batter up." "Agent Lattimer?" "Hey." "Gilbert Radburn." "Yeah, I've seen your name on a few buildings." "Good." "That's why I put it up there." "What can I do for you?" "You were interested in the sculpture that was stolen last night, the Burleigh?" "I was." "And as you might guess, I'm not fond of losing." "What's the Secret Service's interest?" "How it was stolen." "Which was?" "You mind telling me where you were last night?" "Ha!" "I have no need to steal." "Well, sometimes it's not about stealing." "You know, it's about conquering." "Like putting your name on a building." "I was with friends." "All night?" "This is the city that never sleeps." "Do you want names?" "Yes, please." "That would be swell." "Also, why the Burleigh?" "What's so special about it?" "Eye of the beholder, Agent Lattimer." "Eye of the beholder." "Yeah." "I'll get you those names." "Thank you, sir." "(CELL PHONE RINGING)" "What's up?" "MYKA:" "You should get back here." "You got something?" "I found something behind one of the crates, but it's easier to show and tell." "What is it?" "You're not going to believe this, but I smell fudge." "I'll be right there." "What are we talking about here?" "Well, it's right here." "You can see it." "(PETE EXHALES)" "MYKA:" "Right." "(CHUCKLES)" "What the hell?" "Okay." "Easy." "Whoa!" "Oh." "Pete, no." "No." "Artifact behavior usually requires a human element, right?" "Yeah." "Just be careful." "Okay." "Okay?" "Okay." "Wow." "(CHUCKLES)" "Oh, my..." "Check it out." "It's crazy." "Okay, you see, this is one of those artifacts that I'd really like to keep." "Pete, put it in." ""Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat."" "Now that's cool." "Ouch!" "That's what I thought." "What?" "That pinching causes pain?" "No." "No." "I know that." "But the feather, it only works up to your elbow." "So, not enough to get in and out with the sculpture." "Exactly." "Which means that this is only part of the artifact." "It's not the whole thing." "Well, at least that narrows it down." "We're looking for an art-stealing bird that walks through walls." "Like Artie always says," ""Never rule anything out." "Never rule anything out."" "Show me." "Okay." "Looks Native American." "Yeah, we think it fell off something larger, a ceremonial object, a walking stick, a peace pipe maybe." "Or a bird." "Yeah." "Any guesses who this thing belonged to?" "Well, maybe one of the two guys who wanted to buy the sculpture, but we haven't interviewed one of them yet." "Radburn's too rich to risk it." "He could outbid Donald Trump." "I think we can rule him out." "Never rule anything out." "Okay." "Well, the second guy's a rich dude." "His name is Jeffrey Weaver." "Jeffrey Weaver?" "Is that the son of Alexander Weaver?" "Artie, who is Alexander Weaver?" "Yeah." "Was." "He was an extortionist, real estate swindler." "And a ravager of cultures." "Not a nice man." "Now deceased." "And, yes, his son, Jeffrey, lives in New York, so..." "Look, unless the acorn fell very far from the tree, watch your backs." "Hmm." "CLAUDIA:" "Which one are you?" "Let's see." "Is it that one?" "Whoa!" "Jeez!" "Hey!" "Chill, sparky." "How's it going?" "You mean, are you scared I'm gonna burn the house down?" "Emergency exits are clearly marked." "You think my concern for you is insincere?" "I think you should pass me the cable shears." "Those." "So, anxious to get on with your life?" "Such shocking insight." "Did my aura tell you that?" "You're certainly pushing Joshua." "Only 'cause he needs it." "You do have a thing for him." "You're changing the subject." "You brought him up." "Now that you've saved him, your life's work is complete." "And that scares you." "So, you're forcing your own need for a purpose onto him." "Genius." "And all done without a couch." "How much do I owe you, Dr. Freud?" "If Joshua accomplishes great things, then your sacrifice is justified." "But you're also afraid of being alone." "Truly alone." "It's okay if I don't like you, right?" "Of course." "But you do." "(SIGHS)" "(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)" "WOMAN:" "Mr. Weaver will be right with you." "PETE:" "Thank you." "Wow!" "Call the cops." "Crime solved." "It's not what it looks like." "No?" "Because what it looks like is that you're in possession of stolen goods." "Take a closer look." "That's not the one that was stolen." "There are four in the series, each named for one of the four elements." "This one is fire, the stolen one is wind." "Check with the auction house." "How can you tell them apart?" "You're a trained expert with a scrupulous eye for detail." "Or you read the brass plaque on the base." "Jeff Weaver." "Myka Bering, pleasure." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "Right." "You mind telling us where you were last night?" "Hosting a charity event for the Children's Hospital in New Orleans." "Rich, good-Iooking, likes kids." "Who's on a date now?" "Okay, you said that there were four sculptures, earth, wind and fire?" "(IN SING-SONG TONE) Love those guys." "Rock, wind and fire, actually." "And water." "Right." "It's the artist's tribute to Native American creation myth." "Native Americans?" "You into that stuff?" "It's an interest." "You wouldn't happen to be missing a feather, would you?" "Maybe off something that lets you walk through walls?" "What'd you just say?" "(CHUCKLES)" "You've got a lousy poker face there, Jeffy." "New Orleans is, what, a three-hour flight away?" "You're still on our suspect list." "WEAVER:" "Lacell, get in here!" "Whoa!" "Hey, hold it right there!" "Don't move, let me see your hands." "What is it?" "This dude was at Radburn's construction site." "Yeah." "He was giving me the stink eye." "It's all right." "His name is Lacell." "He works for me." "We'll decide when it's all right, okay?" "He also works for Radburn." "It's..." "It's complicated." "Hey, wait." "You work for Weaver and Radburn?" "Look, Lacell's not the problem." "If what you said about someone walking through walls is true, this sculpture isn't safe." "You think they're coming after this one next, don't you?" "We're standing right here." "I think we've got it covered." "Thank you, but I can provide my own protection." "That's not an offer, okay?" "If somebody's walking through walls, the United States government needs to know who and how." "All I can tell you is this sculpture is the next target." "So, please, let me move it to a secure location." "All right, well, hold on." "What's that, Badgey?" "Hmm?" "Okay." "Sorry, Badgey says we stay with the sculpture." "So, wherever it goes, we go." "No, no, no, no, no, don't touch that." "I'm in the middle of a game." "With whom?" "Myself." "White's been backed into a corner by black." "I'm waiting for a eureka moment to save white's butt." "Been waiting a while?" "Three months." "Why?" "Claudia was looking it over." "Noticed you were in a bit of a pickle." "She noticed I was in a pickle." "Where is the little demon?" "She's in there." "She's got work to do." "Artie, Artie, Artie, she's taking a break." "She's been working very hard." "I hate that look." "Here it comes." "Claudia needs a home." "This is not the humane society." "She is not a stray cat." "She's not staying here." "Mrs. Frederic's getting antsy as it is." "I'm not suggesting she stay here." "Artie, you can pull strings." "MIT, Caltech." "Please." "(SCOFFS) She needs a challenge." "Artie, she needs people." "She's got Joshua." "And Joshua's on his own path." "Yes, they're both brilliant, but he's a researcher, and she's a doer." "She needs people like her." "(SCOFFS) Brash, rude, anti-social, impulsive?" "We're discussing Claudia, not you." "See, that's kind of a low-blow." "If you weren't so brash, rude..." "What are you doing?" "No, no, no, no, no, no!" "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!" "Check." "I'll be damned." "Maybe, but I'm not one to judge." "White beats black in nine moves." "(SIGHING)" "Whoa!" "(GROANS)" "Is the sculpture okay back there?" "PETE:" "Yes, it's fine." "I'm fine, too, by the way." "Thank you for asking." "Hey, would you tell Chief Lead Foot to take it easy?" "And how much longer until we reach the airport, anyway?" "(LOUD CLANGING)" "Pete, is everything okay?" "(GRUNTING)" "Stop the truck!" "Stop the truck!" "(GROANING)" "Pete, are you okay?" "Pete, look at me." "LACELL:" "Hey, stop!" "Pete?" "(TIRES SCREECHING)" "I need an ambulance right away." "Pete!" "(INHALES SHARPLY)" "Hey, partner." "(SIGHS)" "How are you feeling?" "Sore." "Everywhere." "Any cookies?" "You've been out for a while." "Remember anything?" "I had my molecules rearranged, and I got shoved out the side of a moving truck." "That about sums it up." "Not surprisingly, it gives you quite a headache." "You know, I told Artie what you said about the buckskin coat before you passed out, and the creation myth." "He's doing his thing." "Yeah, I don't get it." "I mean, this guy could be robbing Fort Knox." "Why the sculptures?" "I guess that's our little puzzle, isn't it?" "(CHUCKLES) Mmm." "The pretty boy." "(IMITATES PORN MUSIC)" "What is he doing here?" "Jeff got you a free multi-point inspection, made sure all your parts are where they belong." "Jeff did?" "Yes, Jeff did." "He owns the hospital, or built it, or something." "Well, that's handy." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "He asked me to dinner." "It's 3:00 a.m." "Well, in the cafeteria." "Big spender." "But I said no." "You should go." "No." "I should stay here with you." "Nah." "Nah." "I mean, Pete..." "Pete." "No." "Myka." "This guy knows what's going on." "Now, go for it." "You know, use your feminine wiles." "Smile." "You're pretty when you smile." "I am?" "Yeah." "So, what does that mean when I'm not smiling?" "You're kind of frightening." "Head injury." "Nurse." "(LAUGHING)" "Something I said?" "(LAUGHING) I was just going to come tell you." "Here I am." "Yeah, you were right." "I have to go." "Wow!" "Zero to 120." "I didn't mean today." "I was just looking for some forward momentum." "Yeah, well, Artie made a few calls." "And there's a position at CERN." "I should take it." "It's a once in a lifetime." "You're going to Switzerland?" "Yeah." "Smashing atoms?" "Like you said," "I can't spend the rest of my life listening to Springsteen and surfing the web." "Hey, if an inter-dimensional rift can't keep me from being in touch with you, you think a few thousand miles will?" "Well, you better." "As I think I've demonstrated, I will hunt you down." "Yeah." "Come here." "Come on." "ARTIE:" "Pete's fine, but somebody else could get hurt." "I mean, where does that buckskin coat come from?" "Is it connected to the sculpture somehow?" "There are hundreds of these Native American creation myths." "I know." "I know." "I still think that the feather, however, gives us our best clue." "Anyway, the feather was predominantly used by the Delaware Nations and also by the..." "Aha!" "By the Lenape tribe." "They're the ones who sold Manhattan to the Dutch for 24 bucks worth of arts and crafts." "(LAUGHS) That's not a great deal." "You had to be there." "And according to Lenape legend, the world was created through the spirits of four elements." "Four." "Fire which gave us our soul, wind, our breath, water, death..." "This is fascinating." "And rock, which gave the..." "Leena." "Rock gave the world solidity." "So, someone has a buckskin coat that manipulates solidity." "Manipulates solidity." "I think that this whole thing could be a pattern." "Because if there are artifacts that control the other elements, and somebody were to acquire those artifacts, that somebody would have immense power over..." "The world." "At the risk of sounding dramatic." "That's never stopped you before." "That's true." "(FARNSWORTH RINGING)" "Mama?" "(GROANING)" "(GRUNTS)" "ARTIE:" "Pete, what took you so long?" "Listen," "Jeffrey Weaver," "I think that that guy needs a second look." "Yeah." "Myka's taking a look at him now over dry turkey, mushy vegetables and tapioca pudding." "Okay, you're still in the hospital?" "I got pushed out of the side of a steel truck." "I'm recuperating." "Yeah, well, recuperate later." "Because while Myka's keeping Weaver busy," "I'm gonna need you to toss his apartment." "Why steal his stuff from himself?" "Is Weaver our guy?" "(LAUGHS)" "Well, tell me what you find out and I will let you know." "(SIGHS)" "(GROANS)" "It's very romantic." "I had Verna turn up the steam tables." "It's all about atmosphere." "Well, you sure know how to wow a girl." "It's my best move." "So, what made you join the Secret Service?" "(SIGHS) Well, it was either that or prison." "(CHUCKLES) I'm kidding." "What about you?" "I mean, what is it you do exactly?" "Accrue interest." "Re-invest." "Try and do something good with it." "That's a nice life." "Yeah, well, it depends on how you got it." "Your father." "My father, yeah." "And you don't want to follow in his footsteps, is that it?" "I want to erase his footsteps." "What?" "What?" "I'm just trying to decide if I'm sitting here with a good guy or a bad guy." "ARTIE:" "You know who was in business with Radburn years ago?" "The other guy who wanted the sculpture?" "That's right." "Jeffrey Weaver's father." "Both those guys tried to push really hard at that time to sell them all four of his sculptures." "(SIGHS) Yeah, what do they do?" "I don't know." "I guess, you know, something happens when you put all four sculptures together." "My best guess." "Something..." "Bad." "Bad, bad." "You find anything at Weaver's yet?" "No." "I don't know." "This place is clean." "If he's the guy with the coat, he probably..." "Come on." "What?" "It's probably nothing." "I'll call you back." "No, no, no, wait, wait." "What..." "You've got to be kidding me." "What a hack." "Bingo-mania." "WEAVER:" "So, what are you really after in all of this?" "And don't tell me, "The government needs to know."" "I'm here for the coat." "And, yeah, the government actually does want it." "There are certain things that just shouldn't be out in the world." "True." "But you." "You're only interested in the sculptures." "Why?" "They're not that valuable." "You know, I think things that were created together belong together." "Whoever's doing this, and I haven't ruled you out yet, is also collecting them." "What happens when the four sculptures are together?" "Seriously, Jeff, you should tell me before somebody... (CELL PHONE RINGING)" "Just give me a second." "Pete?" "Is everything okay up there?" "Yeah." "I'm at Weaver's." "What?" "What are you..." "The guy's got a secret room that's a shrine to Burleigh." "He must have bought up everything the guy ever touched." "Whatever's going on, your boyfriend's neck deep in it." "I'll wrap this up then." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "So, we should probably head upstairs, huh?" "You know, I'd really rather go back to your place." "It's funny." "I usually like it when a beautiful woman says that." "That is funny." "That is funny because I never like it when my date lies to me." "You know, I don't..." "Burleigh was married to a Lenape woman." "The sculptures are some kind of a key to a sacred underground cave." "To a sacred what?" "A cave." "It says that it contains four offerings to the spirits of creation." "Somehow, he hid the directions to the cave in the sculptures." "So, those four sculptures, they're a map?" "If you put the four sculptures together, maybe they tell you where this cave is." "PETE:" "Yeah, but how, Artie?" "I mean, we're missing something." "(KNOCKING ON DOOR)" "(DOOR OPENING)" "GUARD:" "Mr. Radburn, we found this man trying to break in." "It's Lacell, right?" "What do you do for me, Mr. Lacell?" "Geological surveys, sir." "That's right." "You see what's underground, don't you?" "And yet, here you are, lurking very high above ground." "Find anything interesting?" "No, sir." "(SCOFFS)" "You're not a very good liar, Mr. Lacell." "And you work for Mr. Weaver." "Don't waste your breath with denials." "Was he wearing it?" "Yes, sir." "Let me have it." "Tell me about this." "It's nothing." "My father gave it to me." "Don't you mean your uncle?" "As I said before, deception is not your strong suit." "Walter Burleigh was your uncle, wasn't he?" "Why do you think that I hired you?" "I had hoped you would lead me to the place." "Your uncle hid clues to the sacred cave in his art." "What's this?" ""Water, rock, wind."" "Well, that's helpful." "Now I know how to arrange the sculptures." "Wait for me outside." "But what then?" "How does it work?" "How will they lead me to the place where the objects are hidden?" "I don't know." "Give that back." "You have what you want." "Do you want to leave here alive, Lacell?" "Well, is there more?" ""The truth is in the dawn."" "What does it mean?" "I don't know." "(GRUNTING)" "The truth is in the dawn." "What does it mean?" "I don't know!" "I don't know!" "I suppose you didn't know." "The truth is in the dawn." "The truth is in the dawn." "Look, I..." "I don't know what that means, but it's written all over Burleigh's notes." "What's written?" "Dawn." "This..." "I mean, I don't know." "Creation maybe?" "Tony Orlando and..." "Creation." "Or destruction." "Yeah." "(SIGHS)" "Look, Artie, how much of this stuff do we really believe?" "Enough that if he's looking for this cave, it's better that we find it first." "I would agree with that." "Your partner's already got me covered." ""Lucy, you've got some 'splainin' to do."" "So, where's the coat?" "Gilbert Radburn beat me to it, same way he's been trying to find the cave." "What cave?" "Underground, sacred." "Check it out." "We have to stop him." "Like you said, there are some things that should not be out in the world." "Yeah, well, what about that big guy that works for the two of you?" "Lacell is Lenape." "He wants to save the cave, too." "He's been my eyes at Radburn's digs." "He hasn't checked in, either." "I think something's happened." "Okay, so, we have to find this cave before Radburn does." "Well, if he's got all four sculptures, he could be there now." "We've got all of Burleigh's notes right here." "No." "That hasn't helped me solve it yet." "True, Mr. Weaver, but you're not me." "And right now, we need to find the location of that cave before Radburn does." "The truth is in the dawn." "Well, of course." "It's a map." "Thank you." "So, Burleigh stopped taking notes when he got close to finding the cave." "ARTIE:" "Yeah." "It's like he realized the stories were true and stopped writing anything down." "Well, you know, I think it may be enough because I found all these old maps..." "Knock, knock." "...and I..." "I wish you wouldn't do that." "God." "Not funny." "Hang on..." "I just came by to grab my tools and then I'm hitting the proverbial road." "I'm thinking Vegas." "Not..." ""Really?" "Vegas, Claudia?" ""Remember, always hit on 16, never on 17."" "There's got to be a Lenape settlement here somewhere, and it's got to be somewhere safe." "PETE:" "Yeah, and they'd look for a place with special properties." "It's gotta be somewhere safe." "So, no, this is not..." "What?" "What?" "Hey, hey, you'II..." "Dude, have you considered matching these against magnetic ley lines?" "No, you don't..." "One runs right along the east edge of the island." "Right there." "This is the..." "So..." "An underground cave in Manhattan, huh?" "You know, if no one's run into it..." "In all these years, then we can eliminate everywhere where they've dug for major utility junctions and subways." "Subways." "This looks right." "Indeed, it does." "Guys, I think I've got it." "I've got it." "It is Lower East Side, Corlears Hook." "That is just south of the Williamsburg Bridge." "And it's right near the water and it's gotta be away from the subway lines." "And Claudia pointed out that... (DOOR CLOSING)" "Uh..." "Radburn's building there." "He's been digging everywhere that Burleigh focused using new construction to cover his hunt." "Then he's close to finding it." "Okay, Artie, we're heading out." "ARTIE:" "Yeah, okay." "Feel free to hurry." "Yeah." "All right, I need to get right here, right next to this cave." "How long will that take?" "FOREMAN:" "We can blow it in five minutes." "RADBURN:" "I need the contents of the cave to be intact." "Nothing can be disturbed." "Contents?" "Well, if it's a surgical blow," "I say we blast right here, next to it, and go sideways the last couple of feet by jackhammering." "You just get me next to that cave." "I'll take care of everything else." "Let's go." "(ALARM RINGING)" "MAN:" "Fire in the hole!" "(EXPLOSION)" "Your site's just 18 inches the other side of that wall." "Let me get a couple guys with jackhammers." "No one comes near here." "You understand?" "It's true." "It's all true." "The water of eternal life." "(EXCLAIMS)" ""You shall have the power of nature herself."" "(RUMBLING)" "Hey!" "Hey, hey, hey!" "Gilbert Radburn, where is he?" "Down at the blast site, but I'm getting out of here." "(CRASHING)" "Let's go." ""He shall have the strength of 100 men." ""And he shall harness the strength of the Earth."" "You kind of got your hands full, don't you?" "Don't, Gil!" "You don't know what you're dealing with." "You're too late, Jeff." "This is what I was meant to do." "Nut bag." "The nuttiest." "Okay, Radburn, drop the arrow." "Put it back, Gil." "It's not for us!" "Not for you, Jeff." "You're weak." "So was your father." "(BOTH GROANING)" "Listen to me, you don't know what you're doing." "The fourth element completes the transformation." "Then nothing can stop me." "How fitting that this place should be your tomb." "No, no, no, it's not meant for you." "They're meant for the man who's strong enough to use them." "(SCREAMING)" "(PANTING)" "CLAUDIA:" "Knock, knock." "God, don't do that." "That just never stops being funny, don't you think?" "Oh." "Never." "What are you doing here?" "What happened with Vegas?" "That was too easy." "You didn't." "Just a little pocket money." "(COINS JINGLING)" "Shouldn't you be in college or something?" "Don't you want to be with people your own age?" "Artie, I'm not my own age." "Come on." "Writing English papers and going to frat parties?" "Boring." "I mean, at least here, you know, there's a challenge." "That there is." "You up for it?" "The question is, geezer," "are you?" "Oh." "You are so out of your league."