"Bart After Dark" " Dad!" "V-Chip!" "V-Chip!" " Dad!" "V-Chip!" "V-Chip!" "Sorry, sorry." "My fault." "We interrupt this cartoon for a special report." "Someone found my keys." "Kent Brockman at the news desk." "A tanker has run aground on the coastline, spilling millions of gallons of oil on Baby Seal Beach." " Oh, no." " It'll be okay, honey." "There's lots more oil where that came from." "Preliminary reports indicated the ship 's captain was drunk at the helm." "Those reports were later confirmed." "I'm in a lot of trouble now." "Hey." "I'll give you 100 bucks to take the blame." "A cleanup effort is already underway." "And, as always, the first to pitch in are those unsung heroes Hollywood movie stars." "This isn't about publicity." "This is about cleaning off gunk." "As a Golden Globe nominee, I just think it's our duty to make the real globe a little more golden." "We'd be doing our part." "Plus, we get to clean up all those cute animals." "Honey, we don't need to drive 400 miles to clean animals." "You can stay right here and give the dog a bath or trim the cat's nails." "Oh, Mom, please?" "You can make this my birthday and Christmas presents." "You used up your birthday and Christmas presents on that peach tree we got you." "And you hardly ever play with that anymore." "Yes, I do!" "Sure, I do!" "Look!" "Here I am Playing on my peach tree, Mom" "Oh, all right." "We'll go." " The cat needs his medication." " No problem." "The furnace has been giving off a lot of carbon monoxide so keep the window open..." " Cat in the furnace." "You know, I think I'll take Maggie with us." "And if anything happens, just use your best judge..." "Just do what I would do." "A whole week of just father and son." "See you at dinner." "What time?" " I don't know." " Shall we say 10?" "All right." "Just wake me up." "You know, Bart, I saw this one." "Live from the grand ballroom of the Hapsburg Imperial Palace it's the World Series of Bumper Cars." "More food." " Dad, do I have to brush my teeth?" " No." "But at least rinse your mouth out with soda." "I'm gonna rescue a baby seal." "And then I'm gonna save an otter." "I'm sorry, but all the animals have already been reserved for celebrities." "There." "That's 104 pounds of sandpipers." " You mean there's nothing left to clean?" " Well, there are rocks." "Thousands and thousand of rocks." "I've got rocks that need washing at home." "Jeez, look at this place." "We gotta do something." "Garbage angels?" "Dad, I think I need some fresh air." "Can I go to the park?" " Do I have to sit up?" " No." "Knock yourself out." "Milhouse, this is boring." "Make it crash or something." "Perfectly level flying is the supreme challenge of the scale model pilot." " Give me that!" " Hey!" " It's gaining on us!" " I'm pedaling backwards." "Abandon ship!" "I don't like being outdoors, Smithers." "For one thing, there are too many fat children." "Thanks a lot." "Now it's stuck on that haunted house." " I heard a witch lives there." " I heard a Frankenstein lives there." "You guys are way off." "It's a secret lab where they put zombies' brains in the heads of other zombies to create a race of superzombies!" " That's the house?" " Stand aside, wussies." "Go away." "No children." "Enough talk." "S-U-C-C-E-E-S That's the way you spell success..." "No." "No." "Help." "Help." "I'm gonna die." " The witch has Bart!" " We've got to hurry!" "Just a minute!" " Hello?" " Your son trespassed on my property and destroyed a very valuable stone gargoyle and..." " Are you wearing a grocery bag?" " I have misplaced my pants." "I'm not going to press charges." "But I assume you'll want to punish him." "Yeah." "Appreciate the suggestion, lady." "But he hates that." " And I gotta live with him." " You're the man, Homer." "If you won't discipline him, I'll come back and speak with his mother." "No, wait, wait." "Madam, I run a house of discipline." "The boy will be disciplined, and disciplined severely." "Good day." "I don't know how to punish you." " What does Marge usually do?" " She makes me taste beer." "Come on, boy." "Give your old man a little credit." "Yeah?" "Well, I still get to punish you." "You'll do chores for that lady until you work off the damage you did." "It's called responsibility." "Come on in, Bart." "I can't believe I gotta spend my free time dusting doilies in a smelly, rundown dump for a creepy old witch." "Lady, I gotta tell you." "I have been grossly misinformed about witches." "Wow, man." "What is this place?" "I prefer not to be called "man."" "My name is Belle." "And this is the Maison Derriere." "That means the "back house."" " Are you having a party or something?" " Nonstop." "We're a burlesque house." "A private club where gentlemen can play some cards and see a show." "Miss Belle, we're about to do our "Around the World" number but Monte Carlo can't find her dice." "Here you go, darling." "Normally, we don't allow children in here." "But your father was so insistent." "He's tough but fair." "I'll start sorting these bras." "That's a bit advanced for you." "But I know a stopped-up sink that needs some attention." "Just glad to be on the team." "When you work the door, greet the visitors and toss out the troublemakers." "Oh, the old "greet and toss." No problemo." "How did I ever get along without you?" "Is your name Bart?" "Does your father know you're working here?" " It was his idea." " In that case, I'll have a whiskey sour." "There's something unsatisfying about scrubbing these rocks and I think I know what it is." "Lisa, I know it's frustrating, but we made a commitment and we have to see it through, no matter how unpleasant." "Quitting time." "Okay, scrub up and head for the communal tarp." "We're having kelp burgers." "We're going to watch a tape of Johnny Arvik." "He's the Eskimo comedian." "Faster, Mom!" "Faster!" "That was our MC, Mel Zetz." "He got out of bed too fast and broke his hip." "So who's gonna warm up the crowd tonight?" "Well, whoever fits Mel's tuxedo." "The jokes are in the breast pocket." "If you get in trouble, there's a switch that makes the bow tie spin." "Nudist colonies are everywhere these days." "I'd love to go, but I can't get the wrinkles out of my birthday suit." "But I gotta tell you, Adam and Eve must have been the first bookkeepers." "They invented the loose-leaf system!" "If there's a bad bookkeeping joke, I haven't heard it." "It's 11:00." "Do you know where your children are?" "I told you last night, no!" "Where is Bart, anyway?" "His dinner's getting all cold and eaten." "Bart, where are you?" "Come on!" "I have to be up at 6 a.m. To swipe Flanders' newspaper." ""President Eisenhower celebrates 40th wedding anniversary." "Not pictured, Mrs. Eisenhower."" "I'm sorry." "This is all my fault." "Bart was filling in for..." "I don't care if he was filling in for Mel Zetz!" "He's my son and I don't want him working so late that..." "Oh, I agree." "Kids need rules and boundaries." "Yes." "Everyone loves rules." "It's so tough to be a parent these days what with all the gangs and the drugs." "Oh, yeah." "Drugs." "You gotta have drugs." "Hey!" "He didn't pay the cover." "Oh, Bart, he's your father." "We'll comp him tonight, start a tab tomorrow." " I hope I didn't miss the floorshow." " Nope." " Is Roxanne back?" " Yep." " Did she get my flowers?" " She did." " Hello, Bart." " Hello, Principal Skinner." "This is the National Air and Space Museum, isn't it?" "This isn't gonna be about Jesus, is it?" "All things are about Jesus, Homer." "Except this." "Your son has been working in a burlesque house." "Principal Skinner saw him with his own eyes." "That's true." "I was there to get directions on how to get away from there." "Helen, as a responsible parent, I was already well aware of that." "Homer, I'm as permissive as the next parent." "Just yesterday I let Todd buy some Red Hots with a cartoon devil on the box." "But you can't possibly think it's appropriate for your 10-year-old son to work in a burlesque house." "No?" "Well, if Homer wants his 10-year-old son working in a burlesque house then Homer Simpson's 10-year-old son is going to work in a burlesque house!" "That's the..." "Hi!" "Now, Marge, you're gonna hear a lot of crazy talk about Bart working in a burlesque house." "Maison Derriere?" "I can't believe there's a place like that in our wholesome little town." "Did you know it was a burlesque house when you sent Bart to work there?" "No." "I only learned that four days ago." "What were you thinking, sending Bart to such an awful place?" "I was trying to punish him exactly like you would." "So in a way, you really dropped the ball on this one." "This is your mess." "And I'll be damned if I'm gonna clean it up." "Please come in, Mrs. Simpson." "How can I be of service?" "I have a favor to ask." "Please shut this place down and move away from Springfield." " Oh, honey, you can't be serious." " Springfield doesn't want places like this." "I think I know what Springfield wants, sugar." "I've lived in this town for 37 years." "I've lived here 52 years." " I'm third generation." " Sixth." "Get out of my town!" "Listen, darling, we're just as much a part of Springfield as the church, the library or the crazy house." " So I think I'll stay right here, neighbor." " Is that so?" "Well, sleazy entertainment and raunchy jokes will never be as popular as sobriety and self-denial!" "You're about to learn the two most dangerous words in the English language are Marge Simpson." "It's a light pink '87 wagon." "And after visiting the area for the past two months I have determined it is not feasible to construct a super train between Springfield and Aruba." "Next on the agenda is the Citizens' Committee on Moral Hygiene." "I'm here to share my moral outrage." "But this time it's not about that giant inflatable Dos Equis bottle." "It's about a certain house in our town." "What's wrong with this house?" "Is it the plumbing?" "No." "It's a house of ill fame." "A house of loose ethics." "Is there a building code violation?" "A drainage issue?" "A surveying error?" "The house is perfectly fine." " Well, then quit badmouthing the house!" " Yeah!" "Leave the house alone!" "Oh, jeez!" "It's what's inside the house that's disgraceful!" "Drinking, gambling and debauchery." "It's right under our noses." "A secret house of burlesque!" " That's right." " That's not good." "People, this is an issue that we, as a town, are strong enough to ignore." "Let us give no more scrutiny to this bawdy house and its small clientele of loyal perverts." "Oh, I'm afraid this problem goes far beyond Eugene and Rusty." "Marge, if you please?" "Julius!" "Clancy!" " Skinner!" " Seymour!" " Mother!" " Patty?" "Cletus!" "Oh." "Barney." " Clancy?" " Hey, come on!" "You did me twice." "Smithers?" "My parents insisted I give it a try, sir." " Mayor Quimby!" " Oh, well, that could be any mayor." "I rest my case." "Well..." "In light of these new facts, of which I now realize I was largely aware I must take action!" "All in favor of demolishing our beloved burlesque house, raise your hands." "Are they talking about the bordello?" "No!" "The burlesque house." "So just keep your mouth shut." "Oh, there's no justice like angry mob justice." "I'm gonna burn all the historic memorabilias." " I'm gonna take me home a toilet." " Well, there better be two." " Who is it?" " It's an angry mob, ma'am." "Could you step outside while we knock down your house?" "Just a minute." "Stand aside, you degenerate, two-bit proprietress!" "Don't call me that!" "I'm an entrepreneuse!" "Oh, shut up!" "You're wasting valuable smashing time!" "Dad, we can't let this happen to Belle." "Do something!" "Don't you worry, son." "My friends, stop!" "Please, hurry." "Sure, we could tear this house down." "No, my friends!" "Stop!" "Let me finish." "We could tear it down but we'd be tearing down a part of ourselves." "You could close down Moe's Or the Kwik-E-Mart" "And nobody would care" "But the heart and soul Of Springfield's in" "Our Maison Derriere" "We're the sauce on your steak We're the cheese in your cake" "We put the spring in Springfield" "We're the lace on the nightgown" "The point after touchdown" "Yes, we put the spring in Springfield" "We're that little extra spice That makes existence extra nice" "A giddy little thrill At a reasonable price" "Our only major quarrel's With your total lack of morals" "Our skimpy costumes ain't so bad" "They seem to entertain your dad" "The gin in your martini The clams on your linguini" "Yes, we keep the:" "In Springfield" "We remember our first visit" "The service was exquisite" "Why, Joseph, I had no idea" "Come on, now You were working here" "Without it, we'd have had no fun Since March of 1961" "To shut them down now Would be twisted" "We just heard this place existed" "We're the highlights in your hairdo" "The extra arms on Vishnu" "So don 't take the:" "We won 't take the:" "Yes, let's be the:" "In Springfield" "Well, I'm convinced." "The house stays!" "This house is a very, very, very fine house." "Here I come, everybody!" "Wait!" "No!" "No!" "What are you doing, Marge?" "Didn't you hear the song?" "No." "I had to go rent the bulldozer." "Well, we all changed our minds." "Yeah." "Now we love the house." "What about the sleaze and the depravity?" "It was a very convincing song, Marge." "There were kicks and everything." "Can you sing it again?" "I'm sorry." "It was one of those spur-of-the-moment type things." "Well, I also have a song to sing." "Don't make up your mind until you hear both songs." "Morals and ethics And carnal forbearance" "Sorry." "Thanks a lot, Marge." "That was our only burlesque house." "I do love it when you drop by, Marge." "Next time, why don't we get together at your house?" "I'm so sorry." "How can we ever make this up to you?" "Oh, there's a way, Mom." "So Twiggy, I hear you and your husband, Woody, just had a baby." " What did you name him?" " Chip." "Take it off!" "All right, Dad." "You've been warned." "Let's go." " Come on." " Easy." "Subtitles by SDI Media Group" "[ENGLISH]"