"male narrator:" "IN THE DARKEST DAYS" "OF THE CRUEL MAKONIAN EMPIRE," "WITH THE PEOPLE'S REBELLION ALL BUT CRUSHED," "RAGGED BANDS OF FREEDOM FIGHTERS REFUSED TO YIELD." "[dramatic music]" "BEREFT OF LEADERSHIP, THE RESISTANCE FLOUNDERED" "UNTIL, FROM THE DEPTHS OF DESPAIR," "THERE ROSE A GLIMMER OF HOPE," "THE SON OF A BLACKSMITH AND A STAY-AT-HOME MOM." "HIS NAME WAS KROD MANDOON." "WERE KROD AND HIS COMRADES THE ANSWER" "TO HIS OPPRESSED PEOPLE'S PRAYERS?" "OAK." "narrator:" "THE ODDS WERE LONG AGAINST THEM." "HOLD,LAD." "I SEE YOU HAVE NEITHER THE COURTESY NOR THE GOOD SENSE" "TO DISARM IN A TAVERN FULL OF MYRMIDON GUARDS." "FORGIVEME." "THESE ARE DANGEROUS TIMES FOR A LOYAL SUBJECT OF THE CROWN." "HAIL, EMPEROR ZANUS!" "WENCH,STANDTHISGOODMAN A FLAGON OF MEAD." "IHAVEJUSTCOME FROM HARKOUF." "RESISTANCE FIGHTERS THERE" "HAVE BEEN LIBERATING THE SLAVE PENS." "HAVE YOU HEARD THESE REPORTS?" "AYE,THEYSAYITWASTHEWORK OF KROD MANDOON." "BECAUSEI HEARDTHAT-- I'M SORRY?" "HE'SA SCOURGE." "WOW,A SCOURGE." "I LIKE THAT." "MARKME." "THERE'S A CELL IN DONGALOR'S DUNGEON" "SET ASIDE FOR THE WORM-FACED MANDOON." "[whispers]WORM-FACED?" "[mouthingwords]FOCUS." "[clearsthroat]" "WOULD THAT BE THE SAME DUNGEON" "THAT HOLDS THAT TRAITOR GENERAL ARCADIUS?" "INDEED." "BUT ENOUGH TALK OF REBEL DOGS." "I SEE FROM THESE RUNES YOU'RE FROM THE NEW WORLD." "IAM." "MY FATHER CARVED THIS SHEATH WHEN I SAILED FROM MY HOMELAND." ""HROATHG 'BLONBRACKROTHAN."" "WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?" "IT'SGIBBERISH;" "MY FATHER WAS ILLITERATE." "BUT THIS SIDE BEARS MY NAME." "DON'T MOVE." "YOU'RE SURROUNDED." "SURROUNDED?" "BY A GIRL, A GROBBLE, AND A LEPRECHAUN?" "LEPRECHAUN?" "THEY'RE CALLING ME A LEPRECHAUN." "NOW,PUTYOURKEYS ON THE BAR," "OR HIS NEXT ARROW FINDS YOUR SKULL." "GIVE MY REGARDS TO CHANCELLOR DONGALOR." "LET ME JUST ASK YOU A QUICK QUESTION," "WARRIOR TO WARRIOR." "THE WORM-FACE THING." "WHAT'S THAT ABOUT?" "NO." "KROD." "KROD!" "NOW,I KNOWIT 'SPROBABLY JUST A TAUNT," "BUT, YOU KNOW, A LABEL LIKE THAT FINDS ITS WAY INTO A BALLAD," "AND, BOOM, YOU'RE THE WORM-FACE GUY." "ANDWE'VELOSTHIM ." "ISTHEREATERMYOUPREFER?" "WELL,FIRSTOF ALL, THANK YOU." "UM, LET ME THINK HERE." ""KIND"?" "NO, NO, SCRATCH THAT." "WE'RE NOT WRITING A PERSONAL AD." "OW!" "BYTHEGODS!" "THECAPTAIN'SBEENSHOT!" "IFYOU'RETALKING ABOUT THIS ARROW," "IT WAS ALREADY THERE." "WHOAREYOU,DOG ?" "UH!" "MY NAME IS KROD MANDOON." "ANDI AMLOQUASTO, HIS SLAVE." "ANDI AMZEZELRYCK, HIS SORCERER." "ANDI AMANEKA." "HISGIRLFRIEND." "YOU KNOW, IF YOU'RE GOING TO TUMBLE," "YOU REALLY SHOULDN'T WEAR THAT;" "THEY SAW EVERYTHING." "EVERYTHING." "ATTACK!" "[screams]" "OW!" "ANEKA!" "WHATTHEHELLWAS THAT?" "IDON'TKNOW;" "IT JUST DOES THAT SOMETIMES." "YOU THINK I SHOULD GET IT LOOKED AT?" "HELL,YEAH!" "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, DO I THINK?" "YES!" "FIRE!" "OW!" "NO MORE CROSSBOW FOR YOU-- EVER!" "SORRY,MASTER." "WANTTHESE,DO YOU,LOVE?" "WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO DO FOR 'EM, EH?" "WHATEVERITTAKES." "ZEZ,TAMETHEFIRE WITH YOUR WIZARDRY!" "I'MONIT !" "I'M ON IT!" "FLAMES ABATE, SAYS THE MAN ZEZELRYCK." "UM, FLAMES, FLAMES, GO AWAY." "COME AGAIN ANOTHER DAY." "THIS TAVERN MUST BE PROTECTED" "BY SOME SORT OF MAGIC BLOCKING AURA." "THENDOUSETHEFIRESOMEHOW!" "OKAY,OKAY." "[screams]" "ZEZ,THATWASLAMPOIL." "YOUDON'TTHINK THEY SHOULD LABEL THAT?" "ABORT,ABORT!" "EVERYBODY OUT!" "MISSION OVER!" "MISSION OVER!" "GO, GO!" "ANEKA!" "ANEKA!" "OKAY,THATTIME, I DIDN'T EVEN SEE UNDERWEAR." "¶IT'STYRANNY YOU'RE HEARIN' ME ¶" "¶ THAT MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND ¶" "¶ SO GIVE UP YOUR FREEDOMS ¶" "¶ YOU DON'T REALLY NEED 'UMS ¶" "¶ AND BOW BEFORE THE CROWN ¶" "YEAH,WELL, I LIKE YOUR ENERGY." "UM, I JUST THINK IT'S SO IMPORTANT," "WITH A SONG LIKE THAT, TO BELIEVE WHAT YOU'RE SINGING." "AND I FELT, SOMEHOW, YOU DIDN'T," "LIKE MAYBE OPPRESSIVE TOTALITARIAN REGIMES" "ARE NOT YOUR CUP OF TEA." "AM I RIGHT?" "WELL" "OH,BEHONEST." "THERE'S NO JUDGMENT HERE." "IT'STRUE,SIRE." "I DON'T CARE FOR 'EM." "NO,WELL,THEY'RENOT  FOR EVERYONE, ARE THEY?" "[laughter]" "KILL HIM." "SIRE?" "WHATELSE,BARNABUS?" "AQUERYFROMTHE EMPEROR, SIRE." "HE WANTS TO KNOW HOW YOU INTEND TO DEAL" "WITH THE RISING REBELLION HERE IN HESSEMEEL." "REBELLION?" "GENERAL ARCADIUS IS BEHIND BARS." "THERE IS NO REBELLION WITHOUT HIM." "WELL,SPECIFICALLY,SIRE," "HE INQUIRED ABOUT THE UPSTART KROD MANDOON." "MANDOON?" "OH, PLEASE!" "I KNEW HIM AT THE MILITARY ACADEMY." "HE ENVIED ME." "AS YOU CAN IMAGINE, I WAS PRETTY POPULAR." "[laughs] HALT!" "WHO DOUBTS ME?" "BARNABUS." "YOU WERE MY FOOTMAN BACK IN MY ACADEMY DAYS." "TELL THEM, AND SPEAK FREELY." "WELL,NOW,SIR, FORGIVE MY POOR MEMORY," "BUT I DON'T RECALL YOUR BEING POPULAR." "MAYBENOTCAMPUSWIDE, BUT I HAD MY CREW:" "SANTU MOOSNOCKLE, HANS VECK, JONSIE THE YOUNGER, THOSE GUYS." "IN ANY EVENT, TELL THEM ABOUT THE TIME I THRASHED KROD" "IN FRONT OF ALL THE CADETS." "SURELY YOU REMEMBER THAT." "AND, AGAIN, BE HONEST." "BEINGHONEST,YES." "I DO RECALL MANDOON RAINING BLOWS DOWN UPON YOU," "RELENTING ONLY WHEN YOU SOBBED, ALBEIT IT VERY BRAVELY," "FOR MERCY." "YES,ANDAS HE TURNEDAWAY IN DISGUST," "WHO THREW THE ROCK AT THE BACK OF HIS HEAD?" "ONEOFYOURSLAVES,SIR." "ANDVICTORYWASMINE." "ITWASYOURS." "IT WAS." "YES." "NOW, ENOUGH TALK OF MANDOON." "YOU MAY ASSURE THE EMPEROR" "THE ONLY THING HE HAS TO FEAR IS ME." "SIRE,ASSOMEONE WHOSE FEAR OF YOU THREATENS" "MY INTESTINAL AUTONOMY, MIGHT I ASK," "WHY SHOULD OUR RULER, WHOSE EMPIRE SPANS THREE CONTINENTS," "SHARE MY TERROR?" "BARNABUS,SHOWTHEM." "BEHOLD THE EYE OF GALGA GREMDA." "[man's stomach rumbles]" "KEEP IT CORKED, VANAMEER." "OKAY,I 'MJUSTGOING TO PUT THIS OUT THERE." "I DON'T THINK THAT WAS ANYONE'S FINEST HOUR," "MYSELF INCLUDED." "YEAH, ACTUALLY, A COUPLE OF QUICK NOTES FOR YOU, ZEZ." "YEAH,WHAT'SUP ,KROD?" "THEMAGIC." "MM-HMM,WHATABOUTIT?" "WELL,WEREALLYCOULDHAVE  USED SOME BACK THERE." "IDEFINITELYDON'TUNDERSTAND WHAT YOU'RE SAYING RIGHT NOW." "WELL,WHENITOOKYOUON AS MY WARLOCK," "YOU SAID THAT YOU COULD SUMMON STORM CLOUDS" "AND ASSUME THE FORM OF ANIMALS." "ANDI CAN." "THE GUY CALLED ME A LEPRECHAUN." "THAT RIGHT THERE, THAT MAKES IT" "A HOSTILE WORK ENVIRONMENT FOR ME." "WE'REA ROVINGBAND OF GUERRILLA WARRIORS, OKAY?" "ALL OF OUR WORK ENVIRONMENTS ARE HOSTILE." "OW!" "SORRY." "JUSTTENDING TO YOUR WOUND, MASTER." "THAT'SANOTHERTHING." "WILL YOU STOP CALLING ME "MASTER"?" "YOU KNOW I PUT MYSELF OUT THERE AS A FREEDOM FIGHTER." "YOU'RE JUST CREATING A P.R. NIGHTMARE FOR ME." "SORRY..." "MASTER." "UH,ANEKA, I GUESS THAT LEAVES YOU." "COMBATWISE, REALLY VERY GOOD." "POSSIBLY MVP." "COMEON." "BUTTHERE'SAN ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM." "I THINK EVERYBODY SEES IT, AND NOBODY'S TALKING ABOUT IT." "ILOVEELEPHANTS." "NO,NO." "NO, GUYS, NO!" "I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUR WARDROBE." "WHAT?" "WHATABOUTIT ?" "WENEEDMOREOFIT, STARTING WITH UNDERPANTS," "WHICH, FROM NOW ON, ARE MANDATORY." "KROD,I THINKYOUMIGHTBE MICROMANAGING RIGHT NOW." "WHATI WEAROR DON'TWEAR DOESN'T MATTER." "WHAT MATTERS IS THAT I GOT THE KEYS." "RIGHT,WHICHBRINGSME TO MY SECOND POINT." "HOW?" "THEYWERE,UM ..." "FLOATING ON AN ORB OF WHITE LIGHT." "ZEZELRYCK MUST HAVE CAUSED IT WITH HIS MAGICS." "ZEZ,THATTRUE?" "YES,IT'STRUE." "I MEAN, I WENT INTO KITCHEN SINK MODE," "THREW EVERYTHING I HAD OUT THERE." "AND SOME OF THOSE SPELLS ARE ON A TIMED RELEASE," "SO WE MAY NOT KNOW FOR WEEKS ALL THE GOOD THAT I DID." "WELL,SOMAYBETHAT'SWHAT  CAUSED MY SWORD TO FLAME UP." "YOU KEEP SAYING "MAYBE," KROD." "TRY "HELL, YES."" "I'M TELLING YOU IT WAS ME." "I WAS ON FIRE." "GIVE ME SOME." "OKAY,GUYS." "BRING IT IN." "BRING IT IN." "I GOT SOMETHING I WANT TO SAY." "RIGHT NOW, OUR LEADER, MY MENTOR," "THE GREAT GENERAL ARCADIUS," "ROTS IN A COLD, WET DUNGEON BENEATH THAT PALACE." "EVERY MOMENT HE REMAINS CAPTIVE USHERS US CLOSER" "TO A NEW DARK AGE FROM WHICH THERE MAY BE NO ESCAPE." "SO AS SOON AS ANEKA CAN GET DOWN TO THE VILLAGE" "AND BUY A SENSIBLE PAIR OF UNDERPANTS AND RETURN," "WE WILL TAKE THESE KEYS, WE WILL FREE ARCADIUS," "AND WE WILL HALT THE MARCH OF TYRANNY FOREVER." "I WASN'T KIDDING." "TICK TOCK, TICK TOCK." "HESSEMEEL!" "NOT MUCH OF A PROVINCE, IS IT?" "BIT OF A LAUGHINGSTOCK, IF WE'RE BEING HONEST." "WE HAVEN'T THE COMMERCE OF FARUJAH," "THE AGRICULTURE OF COLOSTRUM," "THE VIBRANT ART SCENE OF HARKOUF." "AND NOW THAT THE MULKAVIAN WHORE CARAVANS" "NO LONGER MAKE WINTER CAMP WITHIN OUR BORDERS," "EVEN OUR LEGENDARY SEX TOURISM HAS VANISHED." "WHAT WE HAVE, NOBLES, IS NOTHING." "BUT THAT IS ABOUT TO CHANGE," "ALL THANKS TO THE EYE OF GALGA GREMDA..." "[Vanameer's stomach rumbles]" "THE DEADLIEST WEAPON OF THE ANCIENT WORLD," "LOST FOR MILLENNIA BUT RECENTLY UNEARTHED" "BY THE FINEST CHILD LABOR EVER TO FEEL THE LASH." "SIRE." "THE EYE WAS BURIED FOR GOOD REASON." "IT VERY NEARLY DESTROYED THE WORLD." "ITS DEADLY BEAM TURNED FERTILE VALLEYS" "INTO BARREN WASTELANDS." "WHY, EVEN THE AFFORDABLE SEASIDE COMMUNITY OF ATLANTIS VANISHED" "UNDER THE EYE'S LETHAL GAZE." "YOUKNOWYOURHISTORY, VANAMEER." "ARE YOU PREPARED FOR YOUR FUTURE?" "BUT,SIRE,WITHSUCH A WEAPON IN YOUR POSSESSION," "DO YOU NOT FEAR REPRISALS FROM THE EMPEROR?" "WITHSUCHAWEAPON IN MY POSSESSION, VANAMEER," "I FEAR NOTHING!" "APART FROM TURTLES." "UGH, HORRIBLE LITTLE CREATURES." "THEY GIVE ME THE WILLIES." "ENOUGHNONSENSE!" "TURN THE EYE OVER TO THE EMPEROR," "OR I'LL INFORM HIM MYSELF OF YOUR TREASONOUS BOAST." "WILLYOU,LORDCOMSTOCK?" "SIR." "[whispers] SIR." "YEAH?" "THISISLORDCOMSTOCK." "THAT WAS LORD CONOVER." "ISIT?" "OH, YEAH." "YES, I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO GET NAMES CARVED" "IN THE BACK OF CHAIRS." "DID THAT NOT HAPPEN?" "WELL, LET'S MAKE THAT AN ACTION ITEM, SHALL WE?" "YES." "GUARDS, SEIZE HIM!" "TAKE HIM TO THE TORTURE CHAMBERS!" "BUT,SIR" "GIVEHIMABIT OFTHIS :" ""OH, NO, PLEASE!"" "A BIT OF THAT:" ""OH, NO, I DON'T LIKE IT!"" "AND ONE OF THOSE:" "[choking and gasping]" "RIGHT." "NOW, WHERE WERE WE?" "UH--NO, COMPLETELY LOST FOCUS." "OKAY, LET'S TAKE FIVE." "BARNABUS, SEND OUT FOR JUICE AND MUFFINS." "CRANBERRY ALL RIGHT?" "IFI CANHAVEYOURATTENTION, MY NAME'S KROD MANDOON." "I'LL BE YOUR LIBERATOR THIS EVENING." "[people cheering]" "SHH!" "NOW, OBVIOUSLY, I WOULD WANT TO SHAKE EVERYONE'S HAND," "BUT I HAVE A BIT OF A CHEST COLD, YOU KNOW?" "[exclaiming]" "OH,GOD." "OKAY, OKAY." "GOOD, GOOD." "ON YOUR WAY." "LOQUASTO, I'M GOING TO NEED YOU TO BURN EVERYTHING I'M WEARING." "I'MRIGHTON IT ." "WHEN I'M DONE WEARING THEM." "OH,RIGHT,RIGHT." "AH, BETTER, SMARTER." "YEAH,YOUKNOW, IT'S NOT EASY" "MAKING THE TRANSITION INTO CIVILIAN LIFE." "TRUST ME;" "I KNOW." "SO IF YOU EVER NEED A SHOULDER TO CRY ON" "IWASBORNINTHIS DUNGEON." "I NEVER SEEN THE SUN." "HEY,IT'SHOT, AND IT'S YELLOW." "NOW SCRAM!" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "I'M TALKING." "NOW, WHERE WERE WE?" "OH." "NOPE, SORRY." "ENJOY YOUR FREEDOM." "WAIT!" "YOU CAN'T LET THIS MAN GO FREE." "HE'S NOT A POLITICAL PRISONER." "HE'S A HORSE RAPER." "HE LAYS WITH HORSES." "ISTHISTRUE?" "[scoffs]" "NO." "LIE." "HE SAID HE FANCIED ME AS WELL." "HE ASKED ME TO WHINNY." "LISTEN-- HORST." "LASTNAME?" "DRAPER." "HORSTDRAPER." "MM-HMM." "YEAH,I THINKICAN SEE WHERE THE NAME MIGHT BE CAUSING SOME" "LOOK, GO FREE." "AND IF YOU ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO LAY WITH A HORSE," "MAKE IT ONE OF THEIRS." "OKAY,I 'LLDOTHAT." "OKAY." "THANKS." "ALLRIGHT." "THAT'STHELASTOFTHEM , KROD." "WHAT?" "BUT THE GENERAL." "CURSE THE BASTARDS!" "WE'RE TOO LATE." "KROD." "GENERALARCADIUS." "I'VE COME TO FREE YOU FROM THIS HELLHOLE, SIR." "ASI KNEWONEDAY YOU WOULD." "RISE." "YOU MUST BE THE LOVELY ANEKA." "IT'SANHONOR,SIR ." "MAYI SAY,SIR, YOU LOOK WELL." "DUNGEON LIFE OBVIOUSLY AGREES WITH YOU." "ICREDITLOVE FOR MY VITALITY." "OFCOURSE." "MRS. ARCADIUS EAGERLY AWAITS YOUR RETURN" "AT THE SAFE HOUSE ON LAKE KAMADA." "ACTUALLY,KROD,IWAS  REFERRING TO MY LOVE FOR BRUCE." "RIGHT." "REFRESH MY MEMORY, SIR." "BRUCE IS ONE OF YOUR LIEUTENANTS." "NO,KROD." "BRUCE IS MY EVERYTHING." "ITHINKWE GOTASITUATION." "THEGENERALTOLDME ALL ABOUT YOU..." "EXCEPT HOW YUMMY YOU ARE." "OH." "YOUWORKOUT?" "WELL,SOMEUPPERBODY, SOME LIGHT CARDIO" "YEAH, EXCUSE ME." "MAY I HAVE A QUICK WORD?" "SIR, AM I IN COMMAND OF ALL THE FACTS?" "YOU AND..." "BRUCE?" "SIR, I HAD NO IDEA YOU" "DOYOUKNOWHOW LONG I'VE BEEN LOCKED AWAY" "IN THIS DANK AND FETID DUNGEON?" "WELL,YEAH." "TWO WEEKS." "AND IT'S CO-ED, SO..." "WILLTHISAFFECTYOURABILITY TO ACCEPT MY COMMAND?" "SIR,I 'DFOLLOWYOU INTO THE YAWNING GATES OF HELL." "GOODLAD." "THEN LOCK UP THESE MEN, AND WE'LL AWAY." "NO,WAIT!" "QUASTO, DON'T!" "WH--UM, QUASTO?" "[whistling]" "WELL,I THINKTHATWENT VERY WELL." "I THINK EVERYONE WAS RATHER SURPRISED." "YES,LORDCONOVERESPECIALLY." "OH,YES." "HE WAS A GOOD MAN." "YES, SEND A SUCKLING PIG TO HIS WIDOW AND SOME FLOWERS," "MAYBE A NICE BOTTLE OF ASTI." "AND HOW LONG WOULD YOU SAY BEFORE SHE'S FAIR GAME?" "WELL,YOURATTENTION COULD ONLY BRING HER COMFORT" "IN HER HOUR OF GRIEF." "SOONEHOUROFGRIEF,THEN." "LOVELY." "NOW, WHAT SAY WE TAKE THE EYE DOWN TO THE MARSHES" "AND LAY WASTE TO SOME AWFUL LITTLE VILLAGE," "LIKE--WHAT'S THAT ONE YOU'RE FROM AGAIN?" "NOW,COMEON ." "HAVE A LITTLE THINK, SIRE." "IF WE WERE TO DETONATE THE EYE FROM THE MARSHES," "WE'D ONLY LAY WASTE TO OURSELVES." "IT MUST BE FIRED FROM AN ELEVATED VANTAGE POINT." "EVENBETTER." "WE'LL HAVE IT HAULED UP TO MOUNT KAMADA," "ICE DOWN A PONY KEG OF GROG, ROUND UP SOME WENCHES," "AND MAKE A WEEKEND OF IT." "THAT'SA DELIGHTFULPLAN, SIRE." "NOW, UNFORTUNATELY," "WE'VE NOT YET UNLOCKED THE KEY TO THE EYE'S OPERATION." "NOW, WAIT A MINUTE." "WE BELIEVE THE ANCIENT HIEROGLYPHS HOLD THE KEY," "AND OUR FINEST SCHOLARS ARE DECODING THEM AS WE SPEAK." "HAVEYOUTHREATENEDTHEM WITH DEATH?" "OH,I HAVE,SIR,YES ." "ANDKILLEDONE TO ROUSE THE OTHERS?" "OFCOURSE." "ANDGIVENGOODYBAGS TO THE SURVIVORS" "JUST TO LET THEM KNOW THEY'RE WELCOME HERE?" "ITISN'TMY FIRSTDAY ." "OH,I KNOW." "I KNOW." "I'M JUST EXCITED." "YES,SOAM I." "[horn fanfare]" "THE DUNGEONS HAVE BEEN BREACHED, SIRE." "MANDOON!" "NO,NO,IT 'STOOHEAVY." "ZEZ." "HEY, ZEZ, CAN YOU THROW A LITTLE MAGIC TO THE PROBLEM?" "UH,YEAH,YEAH,DEFINITELY." "UM, I NEED Y'ALL TO-- IF I'M GOING TO DO IT," "I NEED Y'ALL TO GET BACK IF I'M GOING TO DO THIS." "IN THE NAME OF THE UNSEEN WATCHING EYES," "I COMMAND YOU, GATE, TO OBEY AND RISE." "RISE!" "DON'T GO BACK DOWN." "DID YOU SEE WHAT IT JUST DID?" "IT WENT UP." "THEN IT WENT RIGHT BACK DOWN." "WHY WOULD IT DO THAT?" "THAT'S" "OKAY,GREAT." "THANKS." "WE'RE GOING TO NEED ANOTHER PLAN TO GET OUT OF HERE." "THEM, THEY'LL KNOW." "KROD,NOTNOW." "ALL I NEED IS FIVE MINUTES ALONE WITH HIM." "HEY, NO." "NO WAY, NO." "I FORBID YOU." "YOUFORBIDME ." "SINCE WHEN DO YOU CONTROL MY ACTIONS?" "SINCEYOUBECAME MY GIRLFRIEND." "WELL,YOURGIRLFRIEND IS A PAGAN." "I DON'T HAVE YOUR SEXUAL HANG-UPS." "YOU SAID YOU WERE OKAY WITH THAT." "YEAH, BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT MEANT" "THE OCCASIONAL THREESOME AND SOME LIGHT BONDAGE." "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU'D BE BONE-JACKING THE ENEMY." "SEXISJUSTANOTHERWEAPON IN MY ARSENAL." "OH,PLEASE." "DOYOUEVENKNOWHOWWEGOT  THE KEYS TO THIS DUNGEON?" "WELL,YEAH." "ZEZ SAID THAT SPELL." "RISE." "WRONG." "I GOT THEM..." "MY WAY," "THE SAME WAY I GOT THE NIGHT WATCHMAN IN HARKOUF" "TO LET US PASS" "AND THE SHERIFF IN KALKAG TO HIDE US FROM THE" "WHAT,YOUMEANYOU USED YOUR" "ANDWHYDO YOUTHINK THE COBBLER IN DOUVAN TOLD US" "WHAT TIME IT WAS?" "YOUGAVEIT UP  FOR THE TIME OF DAY?" "WE WERE STANDING UNDERNEATH A CLOCK!" "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?" "NO, YOU KNOW, WHO ELSE?" "I WANT NAMES, ANEKA." "IDON'THAVETHEIRNAMES." "FACES?" "IDIDN'TALWAYSGET  A GOOD LOOK." "[snortles]" "HEY!" "NOW, YOU TELL US ANOTHER WAY OUT OF HERE," "OR, BY THE GODS, I WILL THRUST MY BLADE DEEP INSIDE OF YOU." "YUM." "COOLIT,BRUCE." "THERE,BYTHEWALL." "THE REBELS, THEY DUG A TUNNEL THROUGH THE SEWER." "WE PATCHED IT WITH MORTAR." "QUASTO." "NOW DIG." "STOPDIGGING!" "STOP DIGGING!" "IT'S A RAT!" "RAT, RAT!" "OOH, IT'S A RAT!" "UM, I OPEN UP THE FLOOR TO OTHER OPTIONS RIGHT NOW." "THISISOURONLYOPTION." "APPARENTLYNOT." "WE COULD ALWAYS HAVE ANEKA DRAIN THE ENEMY" "OF THEIR BODILY FLUIDS AND THEN WALK OUT." "YOU'REPATHETIC." "THATWASAWKWARD." "UM, I'M GOING THROUGH THE HOLE." "Y'ALL NEED TO WORK THAT OUT." "COMEON." "QUASTO,DON'TLET NO RATS GET ON ME." "OH,BABY,GETMYBAG." "WHICHONE?" "THEONEWITHTHE TOYSINIT ." "NICE." "KROD,COMEON ." "WE HAVE TO GO." "THESALAMIWAGON JUST ROLLED UP." "DON'T YOU WANT TO DROP TO YOUR KNEES" "AND ROLL OUT THE PAGAN WELCOME MAT?" "GOTOHELL." "ANEKA,WAIT." "WENCHTROUBLE,MANDOON?" "DONGALOR." "GENERAL!" "HANG IN THERE, SIR." "YOU'RE GOING TO BE OKAY." "HE'SASGOODASDEAD , MANDOON." "AND SO IS YOUR PATHETIC RESISTANCE." "HA!" "IT'LLTAKEMORE THAN ONE ARROW" "TO KILL THE GREATEST GENERAL THAT EVER LIVED." "THAT'LL PROBABLY DO IT, THOUGH." "GENERAL, I FAILED YOU." "NO,KROD." "YOU'VE ONLY PROVEN WHAT I'VE KNOWN ALL ALONG." "YOU ARE..." "AY,PAPI,WHATHAPPENED?" "HOLD ME, ARCADIUS, PLEASE." "JUST HOLD ME." "BRUCE, YOU INSATIABLE MEERKAT." "OKAY,GUYS,CANIJUST GET ONE MINUTE?" "UM, SIR, YOU WERE SAYING I AM..." "ENGAMORA." "LET'SGO." ""ENGAMORA."" "INTERESTING, NO?" "YEAH." "WHAT IS THAT, GAY FOR "GOOD-BYE" OR..." "WHO HERE KNEW ABOUT ARCADIUS?" "WELL, WHY DOES NO ONE TELL ME THE PRISON GOSSIP?" "I FEEL VERY LEFT OUT." "ALLRIGHT,CHAPS." "HOW WE GETTING ON?" "LET ME KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING" "COFFEE, SNACKS, WHORES." "SIR,DOYOURECALL ARCADIUS' LAST WORD?" "YES." "NO." "WAS IT "MEERKAT"?" "NO," ENG--"" "ENGAMORA." "YEAH, I KNOW." "I KNEW I KNEW IT." "I COULDN'T" "WELL,ENGAMORAHAPPENS TO BE A PROPHESY." "IT CHRONICLES THE OVERTHROW OF THE EMPIRE" "AT THE HANDS OF-- WAIT FOR IT" "A LOWBORN SWORDSMAN." "NOW, THAT MUST MEAN ARCADIUS BELIEVED" "THATSWORDSMAN WAS KROD MANDOON." "YES,SIR." "ISTHATEVENPOSSIBLE?" "narrator:" "IT WAS MORE THAN POSSIBLE." "IT WAS KROD'S IMMUTABLE FATE..." "RIGHT." "I SEE." "HMM." "WASTHATYOU?" "NO." "I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU." "UH-UH." "narrator:" "A FATE" "HE COULD NOT HAVE FATHOMED THAT MORNING" "AS HE TROD THE BANKS OF LAKE HESSEMEEL," "HIS HEART HEAVY WITH GRIEF OVER THE LOSS OF HIS MENTOR," "DETERMINED TO CARRY OUT ARCADIUS' FUNERAL" "WITH PRECISION, HONOR, AND, ABOVE ALL, DIGNITY." "YOUMAYFIREWHENREADY, LOQUASTO." "splash!" "OH,COMEON ." "GOAHEADANDTAKEAMULLIGAN." "[duck quacks]" "I'LLEATTHAT." "IGOTIT ." "OH,THAT'SLOVELY." "SAYA FEWWORDS BEFORE IT DRAWS ATTENTION." "THEBOAT OR LOQUASTO'S ERECTION?" "SORRY." "I CAN'THELPIT WHEN SHE--OOH." "DON'TMAKETHEMAN FEELBAD ABOUT SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL, KROD." "HIT IT WITH A SPOON." "I'LLDOIT LATER." "ISTHATARCADIUS'WIDOW?" "SORRYI 'MLATE." "ENRIQUE HAD TO TAKE IT IN AT THE BOSOM." "CONTINUE." "HEWASAGREATMAN,  A BRILLIANT GENERAL," "A FEARLESS PATRIOT" "AGENEROUSLOVER." "SURE." "AND HE WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO EVER TRULY BELIEVE IN ME," "MYSELF INCLUDED." "KROD,THATWASBEAUTIFUL." "ITWASLOVELY,MASTER." "NOW, WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WITH HIS BODY?" "OH!" "WOW." "OFCOURSE." "COUNCIL,I SEEKYOURADVICE" "IN A MOST PRESSING MATTER." "DO NOT MOLLIFY ME WITH WHAT YOU PRESUME I WISH TO HEAR." "GIVE ME ONLY THE TRUTH AS YOU CONSIDER THIS QUESTION." "CAN I PULL THIS OFF?" "YES OR NO?" "YOU, LORD VANAMEER." "HMM?" "WELL,SIRE," "IN TRUTH, I PREFER THE TROUSERS." "THEPAGANGOATPANTS." "YES,CHANCELLOR, THE GOAT PANTS." "YEAH,THEY'REWONDERFUL, AREN'T THEY?" "YEAH, SEE, I HAVEN'T REALLY GOT THE THIGHS" "TO PULL OFF A LOINCLOTH OR A CODPIECE." "EVEN IF I DID, THE NETHER HAIR THAT SPILLS FORTH IS REVOLTING." "INDEEDITIS ,SIRE." "IT'S ALL" "MYRMIDONS,KILLTHISMAN ." "NO." "OW." "OH,ANDFETCH MY PAGAN GOAT PANTS." "THANKS FOR THE SUGGESTION." "MYPLEASURE,SIRE." "SOWHATNEXT,MASTER?" "AVENGE THE GENERAL?" "TRUSTME;" "THERE'LLBE SOME SERIOUS AVENGING." "BUT FIRST ANEKA AND I JUST NEED A LITTLE ALONE TIME." "WHAT?" "WELL,YOUKNOW," "SOME THINGS WERE SAID BACK IN THE DUNGEON," "SOME HURTFUL THINGS." "BUT IT'S OKAY, BECAUSE I KNOW THIS GREAT COUPLES' COUNSELOR" "RIGHT HERE IN HESSEMEEL." "I'MNOTGOING TO COUPLES' COUNSELING, SO..." "OH,NO,NO , NOTHING LONG-TERM." "I'M JUST TALKING ABOUT A RELATIONSHIP TUNE-UP." "IFIT'SDR.WILLOUGHBY, YOU SHOULD GO." "CANWENOTDOTHIS HERE ?" "WHATAREYOUTALKINGABOUT?" "THESE ARE MY BEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLD..." "AND BRUCE." "I MEAN, YOU CAN SAY ANYTHING IN FRONT OF THEM." "FINE." "LISTEN, KROD." "WHAT I'M ABOUT TO SAY HAS NOTHING TO DO" "WITH YOUR INABILITY TO SATISFY ME SEXUALLY." "GUYS,GETLOST." "NO,WEWEREGOINGTOGO  ANYWAY." "IAMNEVERGOINGTOBE  THE GIRL" "THAT YOU WANT ME TO BE." "NO,DON'TSAYTHAT." "YOU CAN CHANGE." "OR I CAN CHANGE." "OH,REALLY?" "SO YOU WOULD BE OKAY WITH ME, SAY," "GOING HOME DURING THE RACCOON FESTIVAL" "TO COMPLETE THE RITE OF THE 300 MOONS?" "YES." "WOW." "WHAT'STHAT?" "IS THAT,LIKE, A HUNTING TOURNAMENT?" "WHATISTHAT, YOUR ASTRONOMY THING?" "NO,IT'SARELIGIOUSRITE ." "GREAT." "EVEN BETTER." "INWHICHGOODPAGANGIRLS," "ON THE EVE OF THEIR 300TH MOON," "MUST LAY WITH 300 MEN." "OH,DEARGOD." "300MEN?" "GODS,NO,OF COURSE I'M NOT OKAY WITH THAT." "MYPOINTEXACTLY." "SHEGONNASTABHIM ." "SHE'S ABOUT TO STAB HIM." "ANDI THOUGHT YOU COULD HAVE BEEN" "ONE OF THE ONES." "WAIT." "NO,WAIT." "ANEKA, WAIT." "ANEKA!" "LETHERGO ,MAN." "LET HER NASTY ASS GO." "MM, MM, MM, MM." "WHAT A DAY, HUH?" "I'M GONNA TELL YOU WHAT, KROD." "IF IT'S ANY CONSOLATION," "FROM A SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASE STANDPOINT," "THIS MAY END UP BEING A BLESSING." "THINK ABOUT IT." "BARNABUS!" "WHAT NEWS?" "HAVE WE CRACKED THE SECRETS OF THE EYE YET?" "NO,SIR, THE WEAPON REMAINS INERT." "DAGGERS!" "ALTHOUGHOURSCHOLARS COULDN'T TRANSLATE THE RUNES," "THEY WERE ABLE TO IDENTIFY THEM AS TURBIDIAN HIEROGLYPHS" "BELONGING TO AN ALMOST-DEAD LANGUAGE." "NOW, THE GOOD NEWS IS," "WE'VE MANAGED TO FIND AN ELDER FLUENT IN THIS ANCIENT TONGUE." "WHAT,HIM?" "YES." "AREYOUABLETODECIPHER THESE RUNES, OLD MAN?" "ME?" "YES." "OH,NO,NO ,NO ,NO ,NO , NOT ME." "PAPI." "MY FATHER SAYS IT'S DRAFTY IN HERE." "HE WANTS TO KNOW IF ANYONE ELSE FEELS IT." "[whispers]" "WHYISEVERYBODYWHISPERING TODAY?" "TELL THE GUARD TO ADDRESS ME DIRECTLY." "SIR,HEWOULD,EXCEPTYOUHAD HIS VOCAL CORDS TORN OUT" "FOR ADDRESSING YOU DIRECTLY." "RIGHT." "NOW,HEBRINGS VERY GOOD NEWS." "KROD MANDOON HAS BEEN SPOTTED IN THE VILLAGE, SIR." "ARMTHESQUADRON, READY MY CARRIAGE," "AND FETCH A SWEATER FOR PAPI." "KEEP HIM HAPPY." "JOY!" "MY PAGAN GOAT PANTS." "ENGAMORA." "LOOK,BRUCE, IF THAT'S AN INVITATION TO DO..." "ANYTHING," "I'M JUST GOING TO GO AHEAD AND PASS." "PLEASE." "IT WAS ARCADIUS' DYING WORD." "IT REFERS TO THE PROPHESY OF ENGAMORA." "HE WOULD RECITE IT TO ME DURING OUR LOVEMAKING SESSIONS." "HE WOULD MOUNT ME AND PUSH MY FACE..." "OKAY,CANWE JUSTSKIPAHEAD?" "ITCHRONICLESTHETRIUMPH OF THE RESISTANCE" "UNDER THE LEADERSHIP OF THE GOLDEN ONE." "THEGOLDENONE?" "THESLIGHTLYLESSCLICHEWAY OF SAYING THE CHOSEN ONE." "BUT EITHER WAY, ARCADIUS BELIEVED IT WAS YOU." "WAIT,NO." "I--I CAN'T BE THE GOLDEN ONE." "I'M NOT A LEADER." "I'M THIN-SKINNED." "I HAVE BAD HAIR." "IKNOW;" "IT 'SAWFUL." "BUT I HAVE IDEAS." "WE COULD PART IT DOWN THE MIDDLE" "NO,DON'TTOUCHIT." "IT'S FINE." "JUST" "LOOK, THIS IS A LOT TO TAKE ON BOARD." "IS THERE SOMEWHERE I CAN READ THIS THING?" "THERE'SNOTHINGTO READ, KROD." "ARCADIUS PASSED THE PROPHESY DOWN TO ME ORALLY." "OH." "ANDANALLY." "WOW." "LOOK, BRUCE," "AS MUCH AS I RESPECT THE GENERAL," "IT SEEMS THAT HE WAS PRETTY CONFUSED" "ABOUT A FEW THINGS IN HIS LAST FEW WEEKS." "SO I'M JUST GOING TO GO AHEAD" "AND CHALK THIS PROPHESY THING UP TO BIG-HOUSE PILLOW TALK." "KROD,ALLIKNOW IS THAT THE LOVE OF MY" "LASTTWOWEEKS?" "HESACRIFICEDHIMSELF SO THAT YOU COULD LIVE." "DON'T TELL ME HE DIED IN VAIN." "INBAIN?" "NO,INVAIN." "INPAIN?" "NO,INVAIN." "INVAIN,HE 'SSAYING." "OH,INVAIN." "RIGHT." "OH,LIKETHATBLOKE OVER THERE." "EXACTLY." "THAT'S WHAT HE'S SAYING, QUASTO." "ORHIM." "YOUKNOWWHAT?" "FORGET THAT." "THAT'S A MUCH BETTER VERSION OF WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT." "GUYS,GUYS,IT 'SARAID." "HIDE." "[people yelling]" "WELL,GOON ." "DO YOUR THING." "WHATTHING?" ""ALLHAIL"-- OH,SOSORRY,SIR ." "ALL HAIL CHANCELLOR DONGALOR!" "HEAR YE, ALL WHO SYMPATHIZE WITH THE SO-CALLED RESISTANCE!" "LAST NIGHT, THE REBEL DOG KROD MANDOON" "RAIDED THE IMPERIAL DUNGEON." "SOME 40 SOULS ESCAPED." "WE KNOW HE'S IN THE VICINITY." "REVEALYOURSELF,MANDOON," "OR I'LL TAKE THE LIFE OF ONE VILLAGER EVERY MINUTE" "UNTIL YOU COMPLY." "EXCUSEME." "HOW WILL YOU MARK THE TIME TO A MINUTE?" "EVEN OUR MOST ACCURATE SUNDIALS ARE APPROXIMATE AT BEST." "UH,GOODPOINT." "YEAH." "BARNABUS?" "ANDDEFINE"VILLAGER."" "MY DAUGHTER AND I LIVE IN A VILLAGE" "BUT NOT THIS ONE." "RIGHT,YEAH." "HOW DO WE USUALLY DO THIS?" "LOCALS ONLY OR" "ANDSINCEYOU'VEOBVIOUSLY GIVEN NO THOUGHT" "TO TIME MANAGEMENT OR REGIONAL CONSIDERATIONS," "HOW WILL YOU POSSIBLY ARRIVE AT AN EQUITABLE SYSTEM" "TO DECIDE WHOM TO KILL FIRST?" "[snaps fingers]" "WHY ME?" "HOWMANYMORE,MANDOON?" "HOW MANY WILL HAVE TO ANSWER FOR YOUR CRIMES?" "THAT'SIT." "I'M GOING OUT THERE." "MASTER,TOGO OUTNOW  WOULD BE SUICIDE." "YEAH,ANDTO DO NOTHING IS MURDER." "LOOK, IF I'M NOT BACK IN TWO DAYS," "QUASTO, GIVE THAT TO ANEKA." "PEWTER?" "WHAT,BRUCE?" "OH,RIGHT;" "YOU'RE MAD THAT SHE DUMPED YOU, AND PEWTER'S HER PUNISHMENT." "I GET IT." "LOOK,SOI'LLMEETYOU AT KAMADA FALLS" "IN TWO DAYS, OKAY?" "BECAREFUL,MASTER." "HI." "UM, I NEVER NORMALLY DO THIS," "BUT YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE," "AND I WOULD LOVE TO TAKE YOU OUT FOR A BITE TO EAT." "YOUJUSTKILLEDMYFATHER." "WELL,THEN,IGUESSIWON 'T BE ASKING HIM FOR PERMISSION." "[laughs]" "TOO SOON?" "HEREI AM,DONGALOR!" "WELL,WELL." "MANDOON." "WHAT HAVE YOU TO SAY FOR YOURSELF?" "OH,JUSTONETHING." "ALL HAIL CHANCELLOR DONGALOR!" "[dramatic music]" "¶ ¶ [horse whinnies]" "OH, DAMN SWORD." "I FORGOT THE BLADE STICKS IN THE WARMER MONTHS," "SO I JUST" "FOOL." "[laughs]" "WAKEY WAKEY." "WE NEED MORE TINKLE;" "FILL THE PISS POT, BARNABUS." "IDON'TTHINKIREQUIRE ANY FURTHER RELIEF PRESENTLY." "[disappointed]OH." "WILL YOU FILL IT?" "BIT WEIRD ON A FIRST DATE?" "SO YOU THINK YOU CAN KILL MANDOON" "WHERE OTHERS HAVE FAILED." "WHO'S THE MOST FAMOUS PERSON YOU'VE KILLED?" "THE EMPEROR'S HALF BROTHER." "NO,NO,ROGERTHE WEAKDIED  IN A HUNTING ACCIDENT." "WINK,WINK." "HMM." "WHAT ARE YOUR STRENGTHS?" "KILLINGPEOPLE." "WEAKNESSES?" "ICANBE ABIT DISTANT AT TIMES." "IFYOUWEREATREE , WHAT KIND WOULD YOU BE?" "AKILLINGTREE." "WHEREDOYOUSEE YOURSELF IN FIVE YEARS' TIME?" "KILLINGPEOPLE." "HONESTLY,YOUBOTHIMPRESS THE HELL OUT OF ME." "IT'S A TOUGH CALL." "UH..." "DO YOU HAVE A PREFERENCE?" "I'M TORN." "LETMEHELPYOU DECIDE." "TAKEBARNABUS." "DO ANYTHING YOU WANT, GAY STUFF INCLUDED." "IREPRESENTTHESTYGIANCORE ," "A CONSORTIUM OF THE DEADLIEST ASSASSINS" "ANYWHERE IN THE EMPIRE." "SIR,THESTYGIAN ARE THE MOST TRUSTED NAME" "IN CONTRACT KILLING." "ARETHEY?" "YES." "IFYOUDECIDETOGO WITH STYGIAN," "I'LL ASSIGN ONE OF MY FINEST KILLERS" "AND GUARANTEE THAT MANDOON AND THE PAGAN WENCH" "WILL BE DEAD BEFORE MORNING," "OR YOUR NEXT TWO ASSASSINATIONS ARE FREE." "ILOVEEVERYTHINGABOUTHIM." "HE'S GOT FLAIR, PANACHE, EVEN BRIO," "WHICH ALMOST NO ONE HAS ANYMORE." "IFI MAY,SIR,CAN ISUGGEST" "WE PLAY OUR CARDS CLOSE TO THE CHEST?" "MAKE HIM SWEAT." "YES,IT'SSTILLVERYEARLYON IN THE INTERVIEW PROCESS." "WE STILL HAVE A VAST NUMBER OF A-LIST ASSASSINS YET TO SEE," "NOT NAMING ANY NAMES." "SUFFICE TO SAY" "OH, WHO AM I KIDDING?" "YOU'RE PERFECT!" "COME ON." "LET'S KILL TOGETHER." "NOTA HUGGER." "IRESPECTTHAT." "WHOHAVEWE HERE?" "KROD MANDOON." "DOI KNOWYOU?" "YOURESCUEDME  FROM THE IMPERIAL DUNGEONS" "JUST YESTERDAY." "RIGHT,YEAH." "YOU'RE THE GUY WHOSE NAME IS EERILY REMINISCENT" "OF THE VERY CRIME YOU COMMITTED." "ALLEGEDLY." "HORST DRAPER AT YOUR SERVICE." "LET'S GET YOU TO SAFETY, MY FRIEND." "ARE YOU FIT TO MOUNT A STEED?" "WELL,ITDEPENDS ON WHAT YOU MEAN BY THAT." "SAYHELLOTO MISSMILLIE." "OH,RIGHT." "SHE'S YOUR--I MEAN, DO YOU" "OH,NO,NO ,NO ." "SHE'S JUST A FRIEND." "300MOONSAGO, A PAGAN ANGEL WAS BORN." "TONIGHT SHE SPREADS HER WINGS." "PLEASE WELCOME ONE OF THE MOST SPIRITUALLY GIFTED NEWCOMERS" "TO EVER GRACE THIS HALLOWED STAGE," "THE WOMAN WHO PUT THE "RACK" IN "RACCOON."" "[cheers and applause]" "CAN I GET AN "AMEN"?" "all:" "AMEN!" "ALL300MENTOSAYHELLO  TO ANEKA." "[cheers and applause]" "[upbeat music]" "¶ ¶" ""DEARANEKA, KROD HERE." ""IN CASE YOU HADN'T HEARD," "I'M SAFE NOW AFTER A NARROW ESCAPE."" "MISSMILLIE,AREYOU READY TO GO TO THE MEADOWS" "AND CHASE FIREFLIES?" "[coughs]" "HELLO,KROD." "DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE." "ITHOUGHTYOUAND MILLIE WERE JUST" "THERE'SBEENADEVELOPMENT." ""RELATIONSHIPSAREWEIRD," ""SOMETIMES DISTURBINGLY SO." ""BUT I KNOW WE'LL EMERGE FROM THIS HIATUS" "STRONGER THAN EVER."" "¶ ¶" ""I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO WRITE AGAIN SOON" ""FOR FEAR OF DISCLOSING MY LOCATION," ""SO I GUESS I'LL JUST SCRIBBLE MUSHY JOURNAL ENTRIES" ""UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN." ""JUST KIDDING;" "I DON'T KEEP A JOURNAL." ""SERIOUSLY, I DON'T." ""UNTIL WE'RE REUNITED, I REMAIN FAITHFULLY YOURS." "KRODFORD J. MANDOON."" ""P.S. REMEMBER THAT 300 RACCOON THING?" "THAT'S NOT FOR REAL, IS IT?"" "[cheers and applause]" "SHH,SHH,SHH." "NOW, CAN I SEE A SHOW OF HANDS" "FOR ANYBODY WHO WOULD LIKE TO ASSIST THE LOVELY ANEKA?" ""OFCOURSEIT 'SNOTREAL." ""YOU WERE JUST TRYING TO GET MY GOAT." "WELL, GOAT GOTTEN."" "[ominous music]" "HORST?" "I DON'T WANT TO GET IN THE WAY, BUDDY." "IF YOU'RE HERE FOR MILLIE" "I'MHEREFORYOU ,MANDOON." "WHAT'S THIS?" "AH, A JOURNAL." "HEY,THATIS PRIVATE." ""BUTWHATIMISS MORE THAN THE SEX" "IS THE CUDDLING."" "[laughs]" "OH, THIS IS GOOD." "YOUDONOTHAVEPERMISSION TO READ THAT." "WHATA NOB." "[laughs]" "GENERALARCADIUS?" ""HROATHG 'BLONBRACKROTHAN."" "WAIT,THAT'SWHAT'SWRITTEN ON MY SWORD." "HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?" ""LETFIREFLOW THROUGH THIS STEEL."" "WAIT,FIRE?" "IT'S FUNNY YOU SHOULD SAY THAT," "BECAUSE THIS THING HAS BEEN FLAMING UP LATELY." "I JUST ASSUMED IT WAS DEFECTIVE." "THEFIRECOMES FROM WITHIN YOU." "BUT YOU CANNOT MASTER THE BLADE" "UNTIL YOU QUIET YOUR MIND AND ACCEPT YOUR DESTINY." "MYDESTINY?" "YOU,KROD, ARE THE GOLDEN ONE." "WHAT,SERIOUSLY?" "I'M THE GUY WHO'S SUPPOSED TO SAVE THE RESISTANCE?" "NOTYOUALONE-- ANEKA AS WELL." "THE PROPHESY TELLS OF A PAGAN MAIDEN" "WHO FIGHTS EVER BY THE SIDE OF THE GOLDEN ONE." ""WASITME ,OR WASITHER? "" "OH, BOO-HOO, PHYLLIS." "YOUARESUCHADICK !" "USEYOURBLADE, NOT YOUR TONGUE." "YOU NEED HER, KROD, AND SHE NEEDS YOU." "ANEKANEEDSME ?" "IFDONGALORSENT AN ASSASSIN FOR YOU," "SURELY SHE'S IN DANGER TOO." "HEY,BUDDY." "YOU CHOSE THE WRONG GUY TO READ THE DIARY OF." "THISISDEMONRY." "NO,THISIS DESTINY." "[humming] [groans]" "SATISFYING,NO?" "NO,NO." "HEY, HORST-- narrator:" "AFTER CLEARING UP THE MISCONCEPTION WITH HORST," "KROD MADE HASTE TO THE PAGAN LANDS" "TO WARN ANEKA OF HER IMPENDING PERIL" "AND PERHAPS PUT THE KIBOSH ON A PAGAN GANG BANG." "UM,EXCUSEME ;" "I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU," "BUT THIS ONE'S ANEKA'S HUT, RIGHT?" "NO,THATONE." "OH,MAN." "[muttering] PAGAN, STUPID" "JIM?" "WHAT ARE YOU" "OH, MAN, THIS IS" "YOU?" "YOU'RE, LIKE, 90." "HE'S 10;" "TAKE HIM HOME." "PEOPLE ARE DISGUSTING." "HEY,MAN,BACKOFTHELINE." "HEY,BACKOFF,BUDDY." "BUNCH OF PAGANS." "GOINPEACE." "HI." "KRODMANDOON." "HAPPY RACCOON DAY OR WHATEVER." "[sighs] WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" "OH,I 'MFINE,THANKS." "HOW ARE YOU?" "LOOK,KROD,IREALLY DON'T HAVE A LOT OF TIME, SO" "YEAH,I KNOW." "I SAW THE LINE." "PLEASELEAVE." "ANEKA" "WHO'SNEXT?" "ME." "WHATTHEHELLARE YOU DOING?" "HE'SANASSASSIN,ANEKA." "HE'S HERE TO KILL YOU." "YOUAREDELUDED." "AMI ?" "STYGIANCORPS." "HE IS AN ASSASSIN." "PRETTYAWESOME,HUH?" "ITSEEMSLIKEIGETTWO FOR ONE TODAY." "HEY,DICK." "I'M RIGHT BEHIND YOU." "NO!" "SHEATHYOURSWORD, OR SHE DIES." "KILLHIM,KROD." "OKAY." "SHEDIESANYWAY." "SHOOT!" "GOINPEACE." "AW,SORRY,MASTER." "IT'SOKAY." "AH,SHOOT!" "GOD DANG" "DANG IT." "HEY,ZEZ,NICEWORK WITH THE FLASH BOMB." "FLASH?" "NO, NO--OH, NO, NO, NO, YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT THE WAY" "THAT I LEVITATED YOU OUT OF HARM'S WAY." "NO,NO,NO ,IWAS TALKING ABOUT THE FLASH BOMB" "THAT YOU THREW AT MY FEET," "THE FLASH BOMB FROM YOUR MAGIC SACK?" "ITOLDYOUABOUT THE FLASH BOMB IN CONFIDENCE." "I WOULD NEVER GO AND REVEAL YOUR SECRETS LIKE THAT, NEVER." "KROD'S GOT WEBBED FEET, TWO OF THEM." "I'VE SEEN IT." "SWIMS LIKE A DUCK." "WHAT?" "THAT'SGROSS." "WHATAREYOUGUYS EVEN DOING HERE?" "OH,WEBROUGHTYOU  ANEKA'S LOVE RING, MASTER." "THATISNOT-- THAT'S SO SILLY." "THAT'S NOT A LOVE RING." "IT'S A FRIENDSHIP RING." "THAT'SFUNNY," "'CAUSE IT'S INSCRIBED "ANEKA MANDOON."" "FLASH BOMB!" "WHA--THATISATYPO." "THAT SHOULDN'T BE THERE LIKE THAT." "UH, ANYWAY, WE SHOULD PROBABLY LET YOU GET ON WITH YOUR--THIS." "NO,UM," "THIS DISTRACTION HAS BROKEN MY COMMUNION" "WITH THE GREAT RACCOON SPIRITS." "MY HEAD WOULDN'T BE IN IT." "300MENLOCKED,LOADED, AND LOOKING FOR LOVE," "AND YOU'RE CLOSING UP SHOP?" "WHAT, ARE YOU CRAZY?" "HELLO, BOYS." "narrator:" "AS BRUCE ENJOYED HIS INITIATION" "INTO THE PAGAN FAITH," "DONGALOR SHOWED HIS NEW LOVE AROUND THE PALACE," "HOPING ALL THE WHILE FOR THIRD BASE OR BETTER." "I'MJUSTTHREEDOORSDOWN  IF YOU GET CHILLY OR WHATEVER." "[laughs]" "BREASTS." "AND TOMORROW I'LL HAVE BARNABUS FETCH YOUR THINGS." "BUTI DON'THAVETHINGS." "OH,THATIS THEMOSTADORABLE THING I'VE EVER HEARD." "DINK!" "AH,SIR." "THIS GENTLEMAN HERE BRINGS RATHER BAD NEWS" "FROM THE PAGAN LANDS." "PROJECT ENGAMORA HAS FAILED ON TWO FRONTS." "[screams]" "SWEETDREAMS." "RIGHT." "HE DID ALSO HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS, SIR." "WELL,ALWAYSGIVE GOOD NEWS FIRST." "THIS MAN'S BLOOD IS ON YOUR HANDS." "I DO APOLOGIZE." "SOTHEGOODNEWSIS," "OUR TRANSLATORS ARE MAKING GREAT STRIDES," "THOUGH IT SEEMS WE'RE STILL MISSING A CRUCIAL ELEMENT" "OF THE EYE'S AIMING MECHANISM, NAMELY A CRYSTALLINE FOCAL LENS." "FINDTHATLENS." "SIR,THESEARCH HAS ALREADY BEGUN." "WELL,NOWI'MTOO EXCITED TO SLEEP." "HMM, MAYBE I'LL STEAL IN THERE" "FOR A QUICK LITTLE GROPEY-GROPEY." "WELL,I 'DLEAVEIT  TILL THE MORNING, SIR." "YOU KNOW, LET THE SHOCK WEAR OFF." "YES." "BUT WHAT TO DO WITH ALL THIS NERVOUS ENERGY." "OH, HELLO, OLD FRIEND." "BARNABUS, BRING ME A TUB OF GOOSE FAT" "AND A CLEAN SOCK, WOULD YOU?" "YES." "[laughs]"