"Eva?" "Eva?" "Leon?" "Dagobert!" " Are you still drunk?" " No, just happy." " Eva is gone." " Shit." "I'm on my way." " Hi." " That was quick." "How are you?" " Don't know." "Where did you come from?" " I was sitting right outside." "Why?" "I walked Juanita home last night." "I'm completely..." "I'm in love." "She kissed me goodbye in the doorway." "I tried to invite myself in for "tea", but not a chance." "How about you?" "That..." "That marriage proposal..." "That didn't go over very well." "It went..." "It went to hell, didn't it?" "Yes, sir." "I'm afraid so." "But everything will be OK, Dag." "Come here, Dag." "That goddamn..." "That goddamn, fucking cunt!" "That's what she is!" "It's She's..." "This is..." " This fucking sucks!" " Dag..." "How hard can it be?" "I'm so fucking tired of" " being considerate!" "Of needing to please everybody!" "How hard can it be?" "!" "I'm sick of it!" " Dag..." " Don't "Dag" me!" " I don't need anyone, dammit!" " Right..." "Everything in life is difficult:" "Being young, being old." " Good morning." "To you." " Yours wasn't so great?" "Nope." "I've looked idiocy in the eye." "Women are madness incarnate." "What is wrong with you?" "You're a misogynist." "A misogynist is a man who hates women as much as you hate each other." "You taught me that early on." "Remember I told you Family Services is going around observing therapists?" "Yes, I remember it." " Shit, are they here now?" " Yes." " But you're just one of many." " We have to cancel." "Yesterday I was Gandhi, today I'm Bobby Fischer!" "Try to be Gandhi and..." "Why would two bureaucrats from Family Services want to watch me work?" "It's pointless!" " There, there, Dag." " Get me a big glass of water." "There you go." "Hello!" "And I see you have found your places." "So what seems to be the problem in your small corner of Eden?" "Infidelity." "As always." " And who is most active?" " Depends how you look at it." "Who is wearing someone else's slippers?" "Who enjoys parking in someone else's garage?" "Who dips their carrot in someone else's dip?" "Both of us." "We're both cheating, so both of us." "We have an open relationship." "We aren't married." "We are married, but not to each other." "Hang on a second." "You..." "You are not married to each other?" " Correct." " So you two are having an affair?" "Yes, it's been five years." "And the problem now is that Rolf has started cheating on you too?" "I see nothing wrong in that, since what we're doing is already wrong." "You have been unfaithful to being unfaithful?" "You could put it that way." "But two negatives make a positive." "So that's a good thing." "No, that is not very well reasoned." " Yeah..." " What do you think, Silvia?" "We have to try to figure it out somehow." "What Rolf and I have is what makes our marriages work." " That's true." " One relationship is hard enough." "But you're here seeking help for three different relationships?" "You have come to me, a well-educated therapist,   for helping in maintaining your infidelity?" "Man wasn't made to be monogamous." "We have tried to limit it to each other and our spouses." "But now Rolf has..." "I mean, even the kids were happy." " You have kids too?" " Two each." "So you are doing this because of your children?" "Have you no shame?" "You come here seeking my approval for committing a crime   against what, six other people?" "What the hell do you think I am?" "Huh?" "What the hell do you think I am?" "!" "You think you can just dump   your shame on me for betraying another human being?" "There are people out there who don't know their partner." "That is not my cross to bear!" "I am not your Jesus of Nazareth!" "I'm the guy with the nails." " Go and die for your sins!" " We'll take it from here." "No one touches me!" "Not physically, not mentally." "Have you understood?" "Huh?" "Have you?" "Have you understood?" "What?" "What?" " What did you say?" "!" " Yes." "Excellent." " That didn't go so well." " Sure it did." " Now what?" " I have more to do." " Is this one of those days?" " This is one of those days." "Answer, you fucking bitch!" "Christ!" "Was that really necessary?" "The door?" "Is this really necessary?" "I've..." "I'm not..." "doing this anymore." "But that doesn't mean I need to..." "throw it all away." "They keep me company." "Right." " Cigarette?" " No, thanks." "I don't have a kid." "That kid..." "The one I brought to you..." " Marius?" " Right." "Marius." "That's just what I called him." "He isn't..." "He isn't yours." "He isn't ours." "He doesn't exist." "That is, he..." "He exists." "But I just borrowed him." "From stroller." "From a girlfriend." "Sou you aren't a father." "After all." "But..." "I know." "People can't do things like that." "I'm aware of that." "But I wanted you so bad." "You do understand that?" "I just want you, and that other woman is there all the time." " Is she still there?" " Eva?" "Yes." " So I'm not a father?" " No." "Does that..." "Does that make you sad?" "You need help." "Oh, yes." " Can I make you a cup o tea?" " No, thanks." "I..." "I can make something... for you?" "How can you fake having a baby?" "How can you believe you're father to a child you've only seen once?" " She stood there with the baby." " And...?" "A woman with a child in her arms is always right." "She told me it was mine, so it was mine." "I couldn't question that." "Of course not." "You never spent any time with him." " I tried, dammit!" " Did you really, Dag?" "I ended up kicking in her door!" "Sure, today." "When Eva was gone and you had nothing to lose." "No..." "She's the crazy one here!" "I've never denied that." "Thank you!" "As a father, you would have had to fill out loads of paperwork." "It's impossible not to get involved once you've knocked a woman up." " That..." " "That"..." What?" "This was perfect as long as you had Eva." "Eva didn't get jealous because you had a mutual enemy." "You could hate Trine together." "But what will you do now, when you have nothing?" "No girlfriend." "No child." "And after today's incident at work, probably no job." "Here's the deal:" ""He with the most soul and intelligence lives through the greatest tragedies." "But that's also why he honors life." "Since life attacks him with its most formidable arsenal."" "Do you know who said that?" " Nietzsche?" " Correct." "I think it's safe to say that life has declared war on you." "Have good night." "...with his most unique band, Crazy Horse." "I must admit I got furious when I heard this album." "I was so disappointed." " A crappy radio show." " Christ, Dag!" "I tried to get them to play Warren Zevon, but they refused." " You scared me." " Claimed they never heard   of "Reconsider Me"." "Total bullshit." " I should have called." " Yes." "And I would have, of course." "I don't understand why it's a problem that I'm 100 % committed to us?" "That's the problem." "It's so... overwhelming." "Overwhelming?" "I just want it to be you and me." "So do I." "But I feel it's all on your terms." "That you have made rash decisions on my behalf." " Like proposing?" " Not only that." "But..." "This might sound mean." "You've never lived, Dag." "Not like I have." "You have simply existed in your nice little cave." "And that's OK." "But suddenly you know everything about relationships?" "That is my job." "I'm not you job." "I'm not..." "You don't have a frame of reference for me." "You've never had a girlfriend or lived with someone." "And suddenly overnight you're a stepdad and want to get married." "But that's good." "Many relationships..." "Don't talk to me like a therapist, Dag." "But what do you want?" "You just said you want it to be you and me." " Yes!" " Yes." "But I want to be sure." " You aren't sure?" " Not that you know what you want." "OK." "I've let you into my life, my apartment." "I've never been mean." "I proposed to you, said I want to share the rest of my life with you." "And you ran away." "And you say you aren'r sure about me?" "But I saw..." "I saw how you looked at me   when you realized who Leon's father was." "I have a past." "And I carry it with me like a damned backpack." "And sometimes I feel that   you don't know how to relate to how I have lived my life." "And I can't..." "I can't breathe." "I need a break." "A break?" "Teenagers take breaks." "Then we're teenagers." "And how long is this break supposed to last?" " I haven't thought about..." " A break is a break." "I need a specific time frame." "Can it be over tomorrow,   or are you going on a year-long trip?" " I don't know, Dag." " I need a time frame." " A month, for example?" "A month?" "Fine." "One month." "10:56 p.m. One month." "Exactly one month from now." "So what happens now?" "I want you to live a little." "I want you to take it all out." "And then I want you to choose us, because you have seen the alternatives." " You mean other women?" " Yes." "Especially." "Although the thought of it makes me sick." "This is insane!" "Nothing good can come out of this." "No." "Then maybe that's what it was meant to be." "Christ..." "Fine, if you do the same." "I can't come back feeling guilty because you've been sitting here   while I've been wallowing in drugs, drinks and dames." "I don't need to know what you have done." "I don't want you to regret anything ten years from now,   and dump me and Leon." "I don't want you to blame me and Leon for missing out on life." "And I want you to see where I come from." "I don't care where you come from." "And I was never afraid of missing out on anything, before I met you." "Have fun." "Benedikt?" "Hi, it's Dag." "Yeah, she was at her mom's house." "Can you be my guide or a few weeks?" "No, much worse." "I'm going to become like you." "Someone's going to regret handling that apple to Adam."