"'Our work was birth - the primal act of a woman's life, 'a time fuelled by instinct and by fear." "'Trusting our instinct can be what we fear most." "'Our actions are ours alone, and we must suffer their consequences.'" "Morning, Cyril." "Doris must be due any day now." "Ready for those sleepless nights again?" "Bet you thought you were done with them!" "What can I say?" "Well, come on then, lads!" "Put your backs into it!" "Got another load coming in at nine." "We've either done something terribly wrong or terribly right." "Your new hairdo's probably drawn complaints." "Far too racy!" "It's modelled on Jean Seberg in The Mouse That Roared." "Or we've had the record player up too loud and Sister Evangelina's not happy." "Not enough jazz!" "Come in!" "We've had an awful lot of change lately - the move, our new antenatal clinic." "Our royal visit announced us with some fanfare and we're far busier now." "We need a figurehead, just to steady the ship on clinic days." "And it feels right it should be one of you." "All of you brim with invaluable qualities." "Nurse Franklin, as our most senior midwife..." "I'd be absolutely thrilled...." "You bring a reassuring presence to the wider community and I want you to continue with that." "Nurse Miller, keep forging ahead with our Mothercraft programme, for which you show such aptitude." "Of course, Sister Julienne." "Nurse Lee, you showed gumption, initiative and organisation during our move." "I'd like you to be our Acting Sister on clinic days." "Don't quite know what to say." "That you can start with clinic this afternoon?" "Would have been nice to have been considered, that's all I'm saying." ""Reassuring presence in the wider community"!" "Makes me sound like a drinking fountain!" "Or a lamp post." "Perfectly vital." "Oh, look at, you, Sister Lee!" "Isn't it Acting Sister?" "Sister will do perfectly well." "Are we going to be busy?" "Full steam ahead." "Good afternoon, ladies." "Do come in." "Oh, nice hat, Nurse!" "Hello." "Mrs Aston?" "Dr Turner's ready for you." "The cubicle at this end." "Watch it!" "We're low on iodine." "Would you mind restocking?" "Oh, and an inventory of the cupboard would be useful." "We should know exactly what we have at all times." "It's going to be a tight ship from now on." "(I rather preferred the loose one!" ")" "Mrs Short?" "Midwife will see you." "How are you sleeping?" "Thomas says I turn like a mangle, but that's just cos there's still so much to do, so much to be ready." "It's round the corner and we still ain't got a potty!" "Mrs Short, baby won't need a potty for a while yet." "I keep telling him, "It's not going to happen by magic!"" "It's him and me." "It's us." "I keep telling him that, but he just don't seem that bothered." "Perhaps because he thinks you'll make a very good mother." "My mum always said I'd be a natural." "But how can you be, though?" "Something as important as this, something you've never even done before?" "Your mother knows you better than anyone." "Trust her, Mrs Short." "Look up." "Look up." "They say that if you look up, it stops you from crying." "I lost Mum." "Five months now." "Only feels like yesterday." "She said she was going to be there with me and help me." "But she's not... ..and I'm all at sea, Nurse." "You're with us now." "We will look after you." "We need to be careful of anaemia, Mrs Aston." "And you need to slow down." "There's not long to go now." "Cutting hair keeps me sane." "I can't lose my regulars." "Took years to build up customers." "Men wouldn't go near a woman cutter." "Just like women wouldn't trust a man with their hair till Vidal Sassoon." "You'll be feeding for several months, Mrs Aston." "It won't be possible to return to work." "Well, as soon as it is, then." "She doesn't seem to realise she's about to have a baby." "A little complacency is natural." "This is her fourth child." "But we need to make sure she's properly prepared at home." "Of course, Doctor." "I have numerous cupboards at home in want of not just a stock-take but a good old sort." "Volunteers will be fed and watered." "Tell me your cupboards are on the Riviera and I'll be there in a trice." "It's peculiar, isn't it?" "We can be so very organised in our work, yet so chaotic in our lives." "I found a pair of Freddie's booties in the larder this morning." "It's only a matter of time before I start using Peter's police helmet as a coal scuttle." "If you need help, please ask." "We seem to have a surfeit of olive oil, at least." "Chummy!" "One feels one should be able to manage." "You do!" "Besides, you promised all volunteers would be fed and watered." "I'm in it purely for the cakes." "You checking up on me or something?" "I only saw you this morning." "Sorry, Mrs Aston." "I should have given you our delivery pack." "It's important it's kept clean, dry and close at hand." "Shall I take it through to the bedroom?" "Never let up, do they?" "It's quite all right." "Boys, leave the nurse's bike alone!" "We have a collection of items at Nonnatus to help with the baby, should you need anything - a pram, perhaps, or a cot?" "I'm all right, ta." "You're very close now, Mrs Aston." "You need to be ready for baby." "I said I'm all right, Nurse!" "If there's anything..." "I'd see Miss Franklin, wouldn't I?" "We get on, her and me." "I hope you feel you could see any of us." "We all want what's best for our patients." "I dyed her hair the first time." "Miss Franklin, I mean." "Walked in as a mouse, left as Jean Harlow!" "And she swears she's a natural blonde!" "That's how good I am, Nurse." "Yes, and I love her new hairdo." "Don't be worrying about me." "I've had three already." "I don't need no looking after." "Very glamorous for a lecture." "You never know who you'll meet." "Dusty old academics and midwives like us." "It's a talk about childbirth!" "Oh, we'd nearly given up on you." "If we hurry, we should still make it." "The transformative powers of silk." "Day to night in an instant." "You can thank me later with a Babycham." "Come on, Sister Lee." "Time to take your work hat off." "And put your heels on." "I'm supposed to be seeing Alec." "You can blame us." "Oh." "I'm sorry." "He wants to toast my promotion and he'll have already left work." "Doesn't matter." "There's plenty of us going." "You were lending it to me!" "To be presentable for a lecture, not lounging around in some den of iniquity." "I hardly think a port and lemon in the Hand  Shears is cause for concern." "Besides, goes with my lipstick." "Have fun." "And see you later." "I hope the baby's not a brother cos they just punch you!" "Hold still, Larry." "But if the baby's a sister, they don't like pear drops, so you can eat 'em all." "And George Hewitt says they smell like Lux." "Ain't you tired yet?" "Be a sister, be a sister, be a sister!" "Please!" "Enough now, Larry." "Come on, lads." "Stop jumping on the bed." "Come on!" "Look what your old man's got for ya." "Eh?" "There you go." "Go on, then." "Take 'em outside." "Go and play." "Look after the little 'un." "I thought haircuts was next month." "How many did you do today, then?" "Er... five trims and a shave." "You know no other bird goes round cutting blokes' hair." "You're making a joke out of me down at the docks." "Sit down." "Talk to me." "About what?" "I don't know." "Small talk." "Cyril, I ain't got no small talk!" "What did you talk to that lot about this morning, then?" "That's nothing." "That's just..." "Small talk." "What was fascinating in these regions was the absence of pain during labour, primarily because these women did not expect it." "They gave birth without fear." "Compare this to our experience of child birth - a time of pain and fear when a mother's instinct is dwarfed by a well-meaning but patriarchal medical profession over-reliant on mechanics and pain-relieving drugs." "Will someone tell that man to pipe down?" "!" "It's impossible to concentrate!" "Who is he?" "He's Dr Latham." "He's carrying on the work of Grantly Dick-Read, trying to make birth less frightening." "..Tightening the uterine muscles..." "Tally ho!" "Catch him before he goes to ground!" "Tension directly affects delivery, causing pain and trauma to both mother and child and, dare I say it, their future bond." "Let us leave the knitting for the duration of the lecture." "Women's suffering is not confined to birth alone!" "I hope you have a solution for that as well." "There will be time for questions at the end." "I should much prefer a lemon puff!" "You seem different." "Oh?" "Mm." "More authoritative, more commanding, the way you took control of those crisps." "Almost as if you've had a promotion." "I'm hoping you've laid on dancing till midnight and a carriage of white horses home." "It's the least I expect now." "I'd hate to disappoint you." "Just need to get rid of Bill and Ben, the Disarmament Men." "We're joining the march." "What march?" "Alec, this is our evening!" "Ten minutes, I promise." "Must have covered half of London." "I could murder a pint!" "And some pork scratchings." "Students!" "Jenny, meet Bill Corbin and Ben Myles - two young men that want to change the world without ever buying a drink." "Boys, I believe I may have mentioned this young woman to you before?" "Only every day." "So, what kind of march?" "The Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament." "We're banning the bomb." "We're running low, but you're welcome to have it." "Oh, I couldn't possibly deprive you." "Dr Latham," "I have a very anxious primigravida who recently lost her own mother." "I think the idea of giving birth without her is overwhelming." "Yeah, well, I can see your concern." "A crisis of confidence at a time mythologised as one of strength, especially in a matriarchal society like the East End." "Ah, the heckler!" "That wasn't heckling or you'd be lying down with a stiff gin." "The nerve of this plagiarist!" "Lemon puff?" "I don't follow." ""We become mad and delirious, and fears and terrors assail us." ""All these things we endure from the brain."" "Hippocrates." "2,500 years before you... ..approximately." "Dr Latham, we offer Mothercraft sessions at our antenatal clinic." "Would you consider discussing your ideas on fear and birth?" "I'd be honoured." "The East End fascinates me." "It seems to exist in a world outside of itself - preserved, if you like." "I think it's called poverty." "Make sure you get all of those out." "I'll see you soon." "The boys literally don't have a home to go to." "There's about ten of them sharing a bunk in Whitechapel and I'm pretty sure supper involves the bread that the park ducks didn't eat." "You know, I..." "I think they rather look up to me." "Which I'm sure you struggle with terribly." "Alec, I'm tired." "Your friends are perfectly sweet but I gave up tonight with my friends because I wanted to see you, to spend time together." "A few months ago, I'd have spent night after night orchestrating our part in this march." "I build things." "I don't want to see them destroyed." "And now I'm having to MAKE myself care." "Truth is, it's all gone out the window." "All I care about is you." "It's maddening!" "Do stop talking." "Where's my carriage of white horses?" "Well, I had a plan B - unicorns." "But they're proving unreliable, too." "Mythic creatures always are." "Aren't they?" "Look after yourselves." "Right, off you go." "Bye, Mum." "Dr Latham calls it "Nature's painkiller"." "Our breathing regulates our emotions and that follows through to birth." "Hello!" "Morning!" "The blood test results are back from The London." "Doctor Turner's seen them and asks if you'd pass on the good news to Mrs Aston." "Of course." "Thank you." "Oh, Sister Winifred will take your patients when Dr Latham visits." "How are preparations going?" "He needs certain items for his class." "Fred's collecting those." "Just hope everyone finds it as fascinating as I do." "He's fitting us in before he goes to Paris." "And then he's off to America." "New York, Paris, Poplar." "Not exactly a natural grouping." "We'll mention it to all our patients." "First on the list should be Doris Aston." "There's something very unsettled about her." "She'd be a lot more relaxed if her husband wasn't such a bully." "A bully?" "Oh, jealous of any man that looks at her." "Hates that she works." "I possibly shouldn't say, but Peter's had a few contretemps with him." "I believe one would certainly call him hot-headed." "Well, I wish you'd said!" "It might explain why she seems so detached." "You didn't think to ask." "You were too busy being bossy." "If you call trying to do my job being bossy..." "If the cap fits." "Perhaps everyone should sign up." "Mrs Aston?" "Mrs Aston, there you are!" "Good news on your blood test - the anaemia's under control and your blood count's a healthy 11.5 grams." "Sorry, Nurse." "I'm in a hurry." "I've got customers waiting." "Let me help you." "Ooh!" "What have you got in there?" "The kitchen sink?" "Just leave me be!" "Doris, what's the matter?" "I got to go away for a little bit." "Just down to Brighton for a while." "Doris, what are you doing?" "I needed that!" "I've got to go!" "You don't understand." "He'll finish me off." "Has something happened?" "I can't have it here." "Come to the maternity home." "It ain't his." "I shouldn't be here." "It's very kind of you, but..." "Mrs Aston, we want to be able to help you." "You can't." "How can you be so sure about your husband?" "That he's not the father?" "I know." "It's once in a blue moon." "And then we..." "We use a rubber." "I told him it must've leaked." "I ain't proud of it." "What were you going to do, when you got to Brighton?" "Leave the baby." "Leave him somewhere he'd have nice people, the life I can't give him." "He'd kill me if I went with any other fella." "Forgive me, Mrs Aston, but unless you tell him, how would he know?" "He wouldn't be the first man to raise a child who was not his own." "It ain't that simple." "I'm not saying it's easy, but in the long run, it may save a lot of pain." "There's no reason why your husband wouldn't love this child as..." "It's coloured." "I can't hide it." "He won't grow to love it." "Now, do you see?" "What about the father?" "Can you talk to him?" "It weren't no love story, Nurse." "God knows what you must think of me!" "My husband can't ever see this baby." "I can't keep it." "We can find you a safe place to give birth... ..and if you mean adoption, we can help with arrangements, but you must be very sure about this decision." "It's two lives." "One with my family and another with..." "I missed the hot water." "Again." "Ice does wonders for the complexion." "I just wanted a soak in the tub." "It's been such a day." "Trixie?" "Hm?" "The hot water's such a bore, isn't it?" "No, I meant the day." "It's been terribly difficult." "Trixie, I'm trying to talk to you!" "Hm?" "Yes, sorry." "I'm utterly lost in this." "Well, I suppose with great responsibility comes great sacrifice." "Shoulders back and all that." "The smell always reminds me of home." "My mother was a formidable rose grower." "Why is it the English are so very good with plants and so very poor with people?" "That's a little harsh, Sister." "Especially as this is a Peace rose." "I remember my mother telling me about the day it was named, the same day Berlin fell." ""The greatest new rose of our time" ""must be named for the world's greatest desire - peace."" "And yet, here we are with a greater threat - the atomic demon!" ""And there followed hail and fire mingled with blood..." ""..and they were cast upon the earth," ""and the third part of trees was burnt up."" "I've always skimmed Revelation." "Find it rather grim." "I simply hoped to bring us a little closer to Nature." "Well, you are." "And we are in need of it." "I mustered as many as I could from the charity box at Nonnatus." "I've got Dr Latham's accoutrements." "Very grand." "What you doing with all this stuff, anyway?" "The art of relaxation." "It's not for the unwary chap, Fred." "Or, come to think of it, chaps at all." "Ignore her." "Thank you." "Oh, how charming!" "We could start having knitting at Mothercraft." "One can never have enough knitting." "On second thoughts, perhaps one can." "I don't think this little chap's quite ready for the world." "Oh, I must say, this relaxation lark is absolutely top hole." "She'll think the worst of me." "Don't be nervous." "Miss Ellaby's job, as moral welfare worker, is to place baby with a family who can provide the life you want for him." "Miss Ellaby" " Nurse Lee, Mrs Aston." "By the look of things, we should proceed as swiftly as we are able." "At the Church of England Infant Society, we advise a six-week placement in one of our mother-and-baby homes." "I understand this will not be possible?" "Mrs Aston needs to return to her family as soon as she is able." "You are aware that children of mixed blood are more difficult to place?" "We will collect from the cottage hospital in Burnham-on-Crouch, where we've managed to book Mrs Aston in." "Where do they take the baby?" "Miss Ellaby, what arrangements do you make from there?" "The child will be fostered until suitable parents are found." "It never ceases to lift the soul, the type of parents willing to take on abandoned children." "I'm not abandoning my baby!" "I don't have a choice, Miss." "Isn't it more a case of consequences, Mrs Aston?" "So much less palatable than the actions that led to them." "Then let us be grateful we are not faced with them." "And let us feel compassion for those who are." "We cover all of Poplar, and the new clinic means we can provide better care to more women." "Exactly what the National Health should stand for!" "Good people doing good work." "Mrs Short?" "This is Dr Latham." "Mrs Short is the young woman I mentioned when we first met." "Ah." "I don't think I quite have the time today." "I'll come back." "Perhaps next time?" "We may have a lot to thank you for, Mrs Short." "Shall we begin?" "Blankets and pillows?" "I should have brought me nightie!" "I should have brought me old man!" "Good morning, ladies." "It is lovely to see so many of you here." "We're pleased to welcome Dr Latham." "Thank you, thank you." "Glad to be here." "I hope to show you that our emotions link directly to our physical being." "A peaceful mind is a peaceful body, and thus to a peaceful birth." "Birth, the great unmentionable." "But I want to know your experiences and concerns." "How women truly think and feel is vital to my work." "Now, this is your body." "It's not a miracle that you perform." "It's medical." "You take away the mystery, you take away the fear." "What will you tell your husband?" "That I'm not well... ..the anaemia," "I need to go somewhere I can be looked after." "And when you come home without the baby?" "That I lost it." "How can it hurt so much already?" "It was the shock with my first." "I mean, no-one tells you, do they?" "Your body's never the same." "I had forceps." "That was a shock." "If you'd been more relaxed, you'd been less afraid." "All that oxygen going to your muscles helps them to stretch." "When I saw the forceps, I couldn't believe they was going inside me." "Ooh!" "And that reaction, that shudder, is what happens to your cervix." "It tenses, holds on to baby, afraid to deliver it into a world that doesn't feel safe." "It's a powerful instinct at work." "But we don't let it flourish, nor do we replace it with information." "Knowledge is power, ladies." "Um..." "What are forceps?" "You'll know about 'em if you need 'em." "Think of medieval torture and you're halfway there." "Most births are completely normal." "Very few require forceps, Mrs Short." "Well, my mum said having me was no more trouble than sneezing." "Oh, your mother allowed Nature to take over." "Remember that when your time comes." "Right, shall we break for tea?" "Doris is giving her baby up for adoption." "Why didn't you tell me?" "It's been so quick." "There's been time to tell Sister Julienne, to get the adoption agency involved." "I saw the woman leaving." "Jenny, this is an enormously hard situation to deal with alone." "I'm your friend." "You would have confided in me before..." "And I wanted to, but you've had such a bee in your bonnet about this wretched promotion." "Doris has to give up her baby because it's black." "I could have helped you." "I've been through this with Ted and Winnie Lawson." "Can you really compare Ted with Cyril Aston?" "How you and I feel doesn't matter." "It's called a Peace rose..." "..though one feels it has yet to fully realise its properties." "Nurse Miller, you mentioned that you'd read my book?" "Think I know it word for word." "Good because you are going to lead the relaxation class." "But they've come to see you!" "Because you persuaded them." "Because they trust you." "I've no magic." "This is all about instinct." "Trust yours." "Well, ladies, if you're comfortable, then we'll begin." "Lie back." "Place your hands gently on your stomach." "Close your eyes." "Feel your face relax and breathe deeply, right into the bottom of your lungs." "Feel your chest rising." "Not in this girdle!" "Let go of all your worries." "Let go of the cleaning, tomorrow's dinner, the washing." "There's no carrying shopping here, just breathing and relaxing each muscle, the face, the neck." "Relax your shoulders as you exhale, Mrs Short." "Be aware of your ribs moving down as you breathe out." "And in." "And out." "We got company?" "I got to go away for a little while tomorrow." "I got to be in a special hospital for the baby cos of the anaemia." "What you on about?" "What's wrong with ya?" "I told you - the anaemia, makes things difficult." "How come you never said nothing before?" "I didn't want to worry you." "Where are you going?" "Out Essex way, in the country." "For the air and that." "I can't take no time off of work." "Who's going to look after the kids?" "I done you a stew." "Mum'll be staying." "That's the cherry on the top, that is." "Won't be for long, Cyril." "And I'm going to be better." "That's what matters, isn't it?" "Goodbye." "Thank you so much for coming." "Thank you." "Try and find time each night to practise." "You'll sleep better and the exercises will become second nature." "I want that, Miss." "More than anything." "Your patients are in good hands." "I can't thank you enough for coming." "The fact that you asked me in the first place gives me every hope for the future." "I shall keep in touch." "I should like to see how you take on the world, Nurse Miller." "When you've finished huffing and puffing, we expect every pillow and blanket returned in the condition it left Nonnatus." "And if you're suggesting that a few deep breaths and not thinking about what's for dinner is all there is to labour, you are leading your patients up the fairy way." "Told you there was nothing to it." "Do you mind?" "I'm entering a meditative state." "I hope you don't need a passport." "See you after your holiday, then." "Ain't no holiday." "Larry?" "Larry, love?" "I need you to be a big boy." "Larry, I need you to take the other boys to school." "Doris Aston is in labour." "I don't think we'll have time to move her to Burnham-on-Crouch." "It's her fourth child." "There's a good chance labour will be swift." "I'll speak to Miss Ellaby, bring forward arrangements." "You go to Doris." "There's no pain like the separation of mother and child." "You'll need all your strength for Doris." "You got to get me away." "I can't have it here." "I can't!" "I'm afraid you're going to have to." "No time to move you and baby wants to come." "Doris, look at me." "I'm here, all right?" "That's it!" "That's it!" "Good." "Push for me!" "Push for me!" "That's it!" "Good." "Keep that going." "Keep that going." "Keep it going, Doris!" "Good." "Good girl!" "That's really good!" "And now I want you to slow down and pant." "Pant!" "That's it!" "Good!" "Good!" "Slowly, gently." "All right?" "Good girl, good girl!" "The head's delivered, Doris!" "I want my baby." "Doing wonderfully, Doris." "One more push for me, all right?" "That's it!" "You can feel that!" "Good, good." "Good!" "It's a girl." "There you are." "My daughter!" "Her fingernails is white." "I'm going to have to call Dr Turner." "You've torn." "Only a little, but I do need him here." "When does your husband get home?" "Not till evening." "Sister Julienne is speaking to Miss Ellaby." "The adoption has to be brought forward." "Do you understand what that means, Doris?" "Yes." "It means I've got till they come." "Nurse Miller?" "Mrs Short's gone into labour and, according to her husband," ""She must have Nurse Miller!"" "Get your coat and bag." "I'll meet you at the bicycles." "I'll never forget you." "Never." "My beautiful girl." "Remember me." "That'll be Dr Turner." "Mr Aston." "You've had it?" "What are you doing here?" "You shouldn't be here." "I had this feeling." "I..." "I needed to come back." "I was scared for you." "I wanted to tell you." "I did." "I wanted to tell you." "Tell me?" "What you on about?" "Cyril, please don't do nothing stupid." "Please come away now, Mr Aston." "What's the matter with you both?" "There's something wrong with it!" "Why won't you let me see?" "Mr Aston, your..." "Your wife needs to rest." "There was once, just once." "I swear I never looked at another man before him." "Please, let's go outside." "You whore..." "You whore!" "My baby!" "Please, Mr Aston!" "You went with another man, you bitch!" "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" "Cyril, I'm trying to make it right." "My wife...with a coloured bastard!" "She's mine!" "She's mine!" "Yeah, well, that ain't mine!" "You leave her alone this instant!" "Now, you go somewhere and you cool off." "Do you hear me?" "Cool off?" "Calm down!" "Because I will call the police, Mr Aston." "Be in no doubt about that." "Get rid of it... ..or I swear I will." "So soon?" "She's only just recovering from the birth." "And what if Mr Aston should come back tonight?" "We can't take that risk." "Shelagh and I will look after the baby until Miss Ellaby can secure foster parents." "I don't want to take her baby." "Nobody wants this." "But we have to make sure baby is safe." "And she isn't safe here." "If you can't, I will." "Doris." "I'm so very sorry, but it's time." "Carole." "She looks like a Carole, don't she?" "She's very beautiful." "Doctor Turner and his wife, they'll shelter Carole tonight..." "..until Miss Ellaby can make arrangements." "I need to move Carole to where she can be safe." "Home straights now, Nellie." "Just going to examine you." "Don't push, Nellie." "Nurse Miller, what is it?" "Baby's OP and we're only two fingers dilated." "The pain, Nurse!" "Something's wrong, isn't it?" "Baby's in a different position, Nellie." "That's why you're feeling the urge to push." "He's pressing on your back passage." "But you can't push." "Not yet." "Ooh!" "What does that mean?" "Not the forceps!" "Please!" "Promise me, Nurse." "I don't want no interference." "Promise me!" "We'll do all we can to avoid it." "Nurse?" "Don't make promises you can't keep!" "That's the trouble with a little knowledge." "It's a dangerous thing." "We need to get her into the maternity home." "I want my mum!" "She promised she'd be here for me." "Nellie, we're with you." "Surely we can try and help Nellie give birth the way she wants to?" "But she's not doing anything without 100 milligrams of pethidine." "And if I sense one hint of risk, we're calling Doctor Turner!" "Sh!" "Now, close your eyes, Nellie." "I'll draw the curtains to make the room more peaceful." "Take that deep breath and feel it moving through you." "Now come on." "With me." "Out and in." "And out." "And in." "And out." "That's it." "Surely not!" "It couldn't be!" "But that did look like a smile." "You know, it's probably wind." "Ooh!" "Now, that was a smile for me!" "Definitely for me." "I've held so many babies, helped them with their first breath, put them in their mother's arms." "I want the next baby I hold to be ours." "I don't want to let go any more." "You're giving away Cuthbert?" "You've had him since you were born." "I want Carole to have him." "She can look after him." "I'm too old for him now." "I wasn't going to say anything." "Couldn't she stay?" "There's a family out there who don't have any children." "They're waiting for her." "She's going to make such a difference to their lives." "But what about our lives?" "Oh, I think we're going to be all right." "She hasn't got the strength she'll need to get this baby out." "It's been seven hours and she's still not fully dilated." "This is not right!" "Please, Sister!" "Just a little more time." "Her mind is calm and her body will start to relax, too." "I won't take risks with mother or child." "Neither will I." "Feel your chest relaxing and the oxygen coming to your womb." "Give me strength!" "Just need to see how you're doing." "Fully dilated." "All right now, Nellie." "We need you up because of the position of baby, and we need you to push." "You said not to." "Now you need to give it some oomph, my girl!" "And it helps if you pull against something." "And that something is me." "Yes!" "Come on!" "Nana says we mustn't say nothing." "Is she in heaven, Mum?" "Larry, give me a cuddle, please." "One day we'll get a sister, won't we, Mum?" "Think of each contraction as your womb taking a breath, breathing your baby down towards the birth canal." "We're nearly there, Nellie." "Keep going!" "Come on now!" "This goes on much longer, she'll be past the point of pushing." "Nellie?" "Nellie?" "What would your mother tell you to do?" "That's it!" "That's it!" "Big push!" "Now, pant now, Nellie." "Pant, pant, pant!" "Head is born." "Sunny side up!" "All right now, Nellie." "Now, one more big push!" "It's a boy." "You wanted to see the world straight away, didn't you, little one?" "Cos you're brave... ..just like your mum." "You did it, Nellie." "Well done." "Thank you." "For everything." "I love you, Mum." "I never thought I'd say this, but I'm glad you didn't listen to me." "You should be proud of yourself, Nurse Miller." "You did it your own way, a new way, and you were right to." "Thank you." "Oh, I shall sleep well tonight." "In." "And out." "And in." "Any tenderness?" "Anything?" "Everything's normal, Doris." "I brought you some Epsom Salts to help dry up your milk when it comes." "Milk's all I got to remember her by." "Will you help me?" "Course I will." "She's got nothing to remember me by." "I'm her mother but she's never going to know that." "So, I wrote a letter." "Will you take it to her?" "'On one piece of paper, Doris crammed the love 'she hoped would last a lifetime." "'All that she would miss - the first tooth, 'the first day of school, the talks they would have had, 'the love they would have shared." "'She trusted in God that Carole would 'have a good life 'with good people who would give her daughter the future she couldn't." "'More than anything, she wished she could have kept her 'because whatever anyone else might feel, 'it couldn't be what Doris felt." "'Her daughter was of and from her." "'They were a part of each other and always would be.'" "How is Mrs Aston?" "Not good." "I can't let go of her." "I don't know how her mother could." "We do try." "We do our best to make this as speedy and painless as possible." "Paperwork, as always, is a necessary evil and then we may all go about our business." "We've secured good parents, a couple from Durham." "He's a lecturer at the university." "The child will want for nothing." "Goodbye, little one." "God bless you." "Miss Ellaby, I have a letter from Mrs Aston to her daughter for when she's old enough to understand." "She wants to make it clear it was circumstances, not lack of love." "I'm sorry, Sister Lee." "In this case, the parents request no onward contact." "We will take the letter and keep it safe." "If Carole searches for her mother one day, hopefully, records will bring her to us." "Miss Ellaby spoke of the parents as if Doris had no link at all with her baby." "When I was a child, I would write to Father Christmas." "I would put down my many wants, mostly chocolate and cake." "My father would send the letter up the chimney and as far as I was aware, into the hands of Father Christmas." "Not sure I follow." "With the greatest respect, Sister Monica Joan, you can't compare this letter to your note to Santa Claus." "I think what Sister is saying is that sometimes, the act of letter-writing is as important as the receipt of the letter." "Tell Doris we will take care of what she has needed to say." "And if Carole needs to hear those words, she will find us." "So, you're back?" "It's gone, then?" "She." "Not "it"." "Blame me, Cyril." "I cheated." "I done this." "Hate me and I wouldn't blame you." "But not her." "Are any of them mine?" "You know they are." "Could you rinse it again?" "It's got egg on it." "I'm sorry." "I'm doing it again, aren't I?" "I don't mean to be bossy." "I'm just trying to do my best." "You're doing brilliantly, Jenny." "I couldn't have gone through what you did with Doris." "You could." "We all could... ..cos it's not about us, is it?" "Mother and baby first." "Always." "But don't underestimate yourself, Sister." "Even if you do wear that ridiculous hat." "Least I don't pretend to be a natural blonde!" "No pretence, I can assure you." "My mother said I was born with a halo." "Doris must be confused." "She was sure she dyed your hair." "Outrageous!" "Change your mind?" "Come and march for peace." "I'm afraid my mind is completely my own." "And what about your heart?" "I think I'd like to share that." "Shouldn't it be me giving you flowers?" "Well, now that you mention it..." "It's a Peace rose." "My contribution to your march." "I know, I know." "Now, you have your work to do." "My work and my vocation." "Are you planning on going back to your work?" "Doris, you have to stop punishing yourself." "You have three other children who depend on you." "You can't hide for ever." "Just to the shop and back." "I can't." "I ain't ready." "And you won't be ready tomorrow or the day after, but this is your home, Doris, where your children go to school, where your friends are and where you will work again." "Penny sweets, Mum?" "Doris, how are you?" "Nurse." "I'm fine, Lizzie." "Thanks for asking." "Well, what do you have, then?" "Boy or girl?" "And where is it?" "Where's the baby?" "I, um..." "It's been quite..." "No-one's even heard a cry!" "Lucky you, I say." "Mrs Aston's had a rather difficult..." "No baby." "No baby." "Excuse me." "MUSIC: "You Always Hurt the One You Love" by Connie Francis" "'The beginning of life drove us to be strong throughout it 'and to accept the consequences our actions brought us." "'In those acts of instinct and courage we found a freedom 'and it made us bold." "'It made us believe we could change the world." "'And in our own small ways, we did.'" "Nurse Noakes' birthday present." "My Fair Lady, Drury Lane, Saturday night." "You needn't come if it isn't manly enough for you." "I'd come to a meeting of the WI if you were going to be there." "Well, I dare say it will be quite fascinating to be surrounded by hardened criminals." "Most of the women who are locked up are charged with petty theft, fraud, prostitution." "But one thing's for sure." "It is no place to have a baby." "If they think I'm an unfit mother, they'll take my baby, won't they?" "We can't save everyone." "But she isn't everyone." "♪ .." "With a hasty word you can't recall" "♪ So if I broke" "♪ Your heart last night" "♪ It's because I love you most of all. ♪"