"Ok I need to say something" "And this is really hard" "You know in situations like these" "It's best to just take a deep breath and say it" "Grimaldi's pizza's slightly superior than Lombardi's, you win" "Never challenge me when it comes to pizza cause you will always lose" "My dollar please" "What's this?" "Open it and see" "It's a hair put" "Matt .." "Saw it and I thought of you, Bee for Betty" "The stones aren't real or anything" "I mean they're real, they're just not .." "You know .." "It's beautiful, I love it" "I wanted to get you something in honor of our monthiversary" "Has it been a month already?" "You know, you don't always have to bring me back to Queens" "Well that's where my queen lives" "Dad!" "I'm so sorry" "I didn't realize you two were out here" "Hi Matt" "Hello Mr. Suarez" "I was on my to the Bianco's see if I could borrow their cooler to go on this trip" "I made them sugar cookies" "On what trip?" "My dad is taking Justin to a cabin in the Poconos with Elena and her nephews" "Oh that should be cool" "Yeah cool" "Oh ok, I'll see you kids later" " Sorry" " That's okay" "You don't have to walk me all the way in" "What can I say .." "I'm a nice guy" "Hey I had fun tonight" "Oh me too" "Thank you, thanks for dinner!" "It was delicious" "Papi!" "Oh no!" "I'm so sorry" "It's okay, I have a hard head" "How are you doing Mr. Suarez?" "Good, good, how are you councilman?" "I'm good" "Good .." "Good!" "Well I guess I should be getting home" "I'll see you tomorrow" "Oh ok, oh ok" "Goodnight" "Bye" "Bye!" "For now" "So another date huh?" "Things are going good between you guys" "I guess" "Hilda, how was your date?" "You guess?" "Why aren't you more enthusiastic?" "Archie is a great guy" "I know papi okay?" "I like him, I'm just not sure if I LIKE him yet" "Hilda, that's like saying you're not sure you like Sirloin steak, it's crazy" "Mum, Do I really have to go camping with grandpa and Elena?" "Yes!" "Elena's nephews are dying to meet you" "And they planned the whole thing with you and Mike" "They planned it with me and Mike to be at a spa" "With mud baths and ginger facials" "You're going" "There'll be plenty of mud" "Connor?" "Connor?" "Okay guys, with Mode's first ever sex issue on the stand in just 3 days" "It might seem like the hard work's over" "But it's not" "In order to get new advertisers and keep the old ones" "We have to make sure our overnight numbers kill" "That means using every resource we can to get people talking" "You know, fire them up" "Bring it!" "Great!" "See, that's an awesome idea" "I think you people know how important this issue is" "Pardon me, I had a late night" "Here's some more coffee for you" "You all know what to do, let's get to it" "Ok, you are going to laugh" "I just got off the phone with the Olsen's twins" "Apparently they feel just awful that they didn't include you" "In their big "influence" cokie table book" "So they would love it, if you would be a part of their next book" ""More influence"" "Willy" "Oh my god, oh my god!" "She's dead, She's dead!" "Stop your shrieking Marc, I was just taking a nap" "But your eyes were .." "I haven't slept in weeks" "I just wake all night, feeling so tense" "Well naturally, look at your desk, it's a mess" "Maybe something else is on your mind?" "Yes getting a good night sleep is on my mind" "I can't even take a sleeping pill because of that damn baby" "Marc, I need help" "Of course you do" "And I am here for you" "What the hell do you think you're doing?" "I meant I needed you to hire a night nanny" "Oh ok, well I'll get right on it" "But Willy" "Aren't there maybe some other night needs, that aren't being met?" "Willy, Willy?" "Agh, this is so weird" "Hey Betty, I've got a web thing" "What do you think about "fun sex versus boring relationship sex"?" "You can write about all the boring things you do with what's his name" " Matt" " Whatever" "And I can write about all the fun things I'm gonna do" "With whatever guy I meet tonight" "How about the modern-day mating rituals" "You know something a little less personal" "Ooh you slut!" "Why?" "What are you hiding?" "Matt's into kink isn't he?" "Is he your loving pig?" "Does he like ice cubing?" " Ice what?" " Cubing" "No, Matt is into normal things I think" "Oh my god, are you actually saying that you haven't tapped that yet?" "No, but we're definitely headed in that direction" "We just haven't got there yet" "This is none of your business" "But Betty you have been dating for like a year" " A month" " Exactly" "And he's a billionaire and for some reason he seems to be into you" "What the hell are you waiting for?" "Betty are you wearing the La Fleur?" "Maybe .." "Ooh what's the special occasion?" "Matt and I have a date and I was kinda hoping tonight will be the night" "Hoping?" "if you're ready just tell him" "Well it's not that easy, I mean I've never had to do that before" "With Henry and Walter it just kinda happened" "Oh yeah, well some guys need more of a push" "Let me see your bra" "What?" "!" "Aye, papi jeez, you're going camping for two days not two weeks" "I know!" "He can bring six cans of bug sprays" "But I can't bring a blow dryer" "There's no electricity" "Oh dear god!" "Hey we hit the road at 5am" "You girls up for an early breakfast?" "Well I know I'll be there" "I have a date with Archie so I should be in bed by 9" "Haha good!" "How about you Betty?" "Actually, I .." "Matt and I are gonna have a late dinner" "That's alright, I'll just come in and give you a little kiss before we leave" "Papi, I think that I'm gonna stay in the city tonight" "You know, get some work on my web article done" "How can you stay in the city, you don't have a place there anymore" "Jeez, papi, she's spending the night with her boyfriend" "Even I knew that, she's wearing lip gloss!" "Okay, I'll just see you when I see you, bye" " Have fun!" "Bye!" "Hey Daniel, can I ask you something?" "What do you think of me doing a poetry slam?" "Oh you're serious" "Yeah I've been writing poetry for years" "And I never had enough to perform any of it" "And it's something I've always wanted to do" "Then you should definitely do that" "You don't think it sounds crazy?" "I didn't say that" "Hey!" "Well seriously I think that's brave" "You couldn't pay me enough to get up in front of people and perform" "Why?" "Just a horrible scarring, High school rock band experience" "Oh my god!" "You were in a band?" "What did you play?" "Guitar, sort of, I thought I was really good, I was really bad!" "What happened?" "Umm I had to write this incredibly cheesy song "Crash and Burn" it was called" "For the battle of the bands at school" "I was laughed off the stage" "You would've laughed too though, especially if you'd seen my hair" "I wanna see a picture" "Oh no forget it, I don't wanna ruin your perfect image of me" "Too late" "Ok, Mr. protégé piano guy, how's this one?" "That was it, that was it!" "That was a perfect A-flat" "Shut up!" "You're a bad liar" "No, I'm not lying, I'm still deafened from when you did your C-sharp" "Hey!" "Guess I should get you a cab" "Or I could come upstairs and take a peek at your new wall color" "Hahaha .." "That's funny, oh wait here comes one, taxi!" "No, Matt, I'm not expected home .." "There you go, alright I'll call you later, bye!" "That guy couldn't get rid of you fast enough!" "Thanks Archie that's sweet, ok, talk to you later" "Agh, what kind of a guy calls an hour after a date to say he had a good time" "I think he's a little too into me" "He spent all night touching my arm, and trying to hold my hand" "Oh poor Hilda!" "Nice guy can't keep his hands off of you, how awful!" "Excuse me, what is your problem?" "My problem is that you've been complaining about Archie" "Since the two of you started seeing each other" "He's so into me, he calls just to say nice things" "If it bothers you that much, then why don't you just break up with him?" "Maybe you're right, I tried to do the nice guy thing" "What can I say, he's just not my type" "What are you doing home anyway, I thought tonight was supposed to be like the night" "Well apparently, it wasn't" "What happened?" "Nothing, nothing happened" "I tried to make it very clear that I wanted to stay over" "And he just laughed and put me in a cab" "Well maybe he misunderstood your signals" "You're very subtle, that's your style" "Rule number 1, never be subtle" "I don't know, I mean, I think subtlety works sometimes" "Yeah maybe 100 years ago, in like the 1950's" "But trust me, these days, bolder is better" "So what, a girl's just supposed to come out and say it?" "You know, like I want to .." "You know, I mean not everybody can do that" "Oh my god!" "Still dry in Betty county?" "Still non of your business Amanda!" "Exactly!" "Betty in honor of us once being roommates" "I'm going to personally teach you how to be sexy" "Well you know, as sexy as this can be" "I will show you some of my no-fail moves" "Admit it Betty, you need a little help in this department" "It'll be great for our article" " Well" " Woooo" "Get ready, Betty, sex train is coming" "Agh how lame" "How cool, a poetry slam?" "Yup Molly's super excited and I've been so busy trying to keep this company together" "I just really want it to be a great night for her" "Well I'll definitely be there, I love poetry" "It was one of my favorite classes in college" " Really?" " Yeah" "Maybe you should read this" "I think it's pretty good although I'm not much of a poetry person" "Softly caressing waves, good title .." "Wow, wow" "Wow what, wow good or wow bad" "Just wow!" "I'm impressed that Molly's reading this, it's very personal and intimate" "It is?" "I thought it was about the ocean" "Daniel, the ocean is a metaphor for you and her, and the two of you .." "Softly caressing .." "Wow, I mean I totally missed that, are you sure?" "Pretty sure, I lay my head on the soft pale sand breathing in his salty scent" "Is that supposed to be my chest?" "And I'm pretty sure that the rock is your head" "How do you know it's my head?" "Cause it's crying?" "What?" "Rocks don't cry" "Wow, it's so weird to be back here" "I know right?" "I miss the me it was with us" "Okay, we're ready for operation Betty sexification" "Amanda, I thought it was just gonna be us girls" " It is" " You can thank us later by taking us to lunch" "Agh, this is an impossible deadline" "Matt's gonna be here in two hours" "God, where do we even begin, look at her" "Umm yeah, this is a toughie, we have to stay calm" "The key is to come at your target using all six senses" "Sound, smell, taste, touch, sight and style" "Well technically style is .." "Shhh!" "We have to work fast and furious if we're gonna make it in time" "Now, pay attention" "First sense sound" "Next sense, smell" "Taste" "Show him your lips are available and open for business" "Eat slowly and seductively" " Touch" " Ignite his pleasure center with a soft graze" "Sight and style" "Now the art of the seductive hair flick" "Ok, put this on" " Now, what about those braces can those come off?" " No" "Can we at least lose the glasses?" "I kind of need them to see" "My concern is what he's going to see" "Oh and don't forget about this" "A ladle?" "What's this for?" "You'll know when the time comes" "I can't believe I'm saying this but Betty Suarez is getting some strange tonight" " Hey thanks guys" " Go get him tiger" "Where did he go?" "Where are you?" "Who the hell are you?" "I'm your new night nanny" "The new night nanny?" "What was that brawling?" "Oh I was reading William Goldilocks and the three bears" "I guess I got a little roarrr, carried away" "I'm Sorry if I woke you up" "I'm James by the way" "Carry on James" "This place is even better than last night" "We'll have two orders of that please" "You have got to try this dish, it's killing" "Oh?" "Don't move, you just look really pretty in that light" "Oh thank you" "And now you moved and it's gone" "Kidding it's still on" "Listen Archie, I think maybe .." "Archie?" "Archie I thought that was you how are you?" "I'm, I'm good, real good" "Hilda, this is Felicia, she and I used to be neighbors" "Oh well we used to be more than that" "Biggest mistake I ever made was letting this one slip through my fingers" "I thought I take a little break to make you flash cards and seduce you" "Oh god I love your chest so warm and cozy" "So I finally had a chance to read your poem" "You did?" "What did you think?" "Yeah it's great" "Had some thoughts from an editorial perspective if you want" "That would be great, I would love your professional opinion" "I'll go grab it" "Got it right here" "Wow you made a lot of notes" "No no, I just kinda jotted down some ideas" "Like um, instead of softly caressing," "Maybe the waves should be hard and crashing" "And should this rock really sprout tears?" "It seems exaggerated" "I mean I would buy it if the rock maybe shed a single tear once" "Or you could just lose the image all together" "Ok, you wanna tell me what this is really about?" "I know this poem is about us, you know .." "Having sex .." "Yeah .." "So?" "So you're gonna read this in public" "Like in front of people I work with, it's embarrassing" "I see" "Well the last thing I wanted to do is embarrass you" "Molly come on" "No it's fine, I'll just read something else" "I should get back to work" "You always did know how to make me laugh" "I swear the biggest mistake I ever made was letting this guy slip through my fingers" "Yeah, you mentioned that" "Felicia, maybe we should get started on our food before it gets cold" "Oh my god!" "I didn't even notice, what a jerk" " It was so nice meeting you" " Yeah, you too" "Call me sugar" "I'm sorry, Felicia is a bit of a talker" "I know!" "I was like hello, we're on a date here" "Come in!" "Hello" "Oh hey Matt I'll be right out I'm just changing out my work clothes" "Okay" "Wow this place is cool" "Now I can see why you were so bummed out when you had to give it up" "Uh, you know we should really get going if we're gonna make that movie" "What's your hurry soldier?" "Wow you look great, but the movie starts in like 20 minutes" "You should probably get dressed" "Actually, I was thinking" "Maybe we could just stay in tonight and relax" "Oh I made mojitos, want one?" "Uh, I'm not really a mojito kinda guy" "Oh okay, well then, we could just get comfortable" "And sit, we could sit" "Oh look what you found" "Sorry, here" "We should probably just go to that movie" "Or we could stay here and you know, be together .." "Betty, I can't do this" "Matt, where are you going?" "Betty I'm sorry, it's not you, it's me" " Wow, that was .." "Wow" " I know" " I did not expect that to happen" " Me neither" "I .." "To be honest I actually thought you were gonna break up with me" " I totally was" " You were?" "Yeah, if Felicia hadn't stopped by and interrupted me," "This evening would've gone a hell of a lot differently" "So what made you change your mind?" "Huh?" "I don't know" "You weren't gonna give me a chance until you saw another woman was into me" "What?" "That is not true" "Okay, alright maybe it is a little bit, I usually go for that kinda guy, you know" "Right .." "So do I need Felicia to interrupt everyday to get you in the mood?" "Cause that would be, you know, pretty complicated foreplay" "No, but a little tattoo on your back wouldn't hurt" "You know what, I'm gonna go" "Excuse me what just happened here?" "Thanks for a memorable night" "I was just kidding" "So that is your idea of a qualified child care professional?" "Oh my god, he's completely qualified" "He's a former model and he's done diaper commercials" "Ok honestly, I thought that manny poppins might help you get your groove back" "You know, so that you can sleep better" "What are you implying?" "My groove is perfectly fine" "Willy, I keep your appointments remember?" "And I haven't scheduled you for one of your weekly "carwashes" since before Connor" "And .." "I just thought that James could wash your car for you" "It's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard" "Oh come on, he's totally hot, he looks like Taye Diggs" "What is it with white people and Taye Diggs?" "Fine, I will call another nanny" "Wait, he does already know the apartment" "So he can stay .." "For now" "Oh and book me a Brazilian with Jonny" "Oooh" "Completely unrelated" "It went horribly" "What?" "Our moves didn't work?" "Impossible" "Those moves are fabby" "You must've done something wrong" "Did you do the hair flick?" "Or use the ladle" "Guys don't worry, it wasn't your moves, it was me" "The whole night was a disaster" "I practically threw myself at him and he ran out the door" "Running away from a girl screaming?" "That sounds like my prom night" "Oh My god he's gay" " Or a virgin" " Or a woman" "Umm that feels right" "Well, I just, I wanna talk to him about it" "But I can't because he just texted me and he's working through lunch" "Um, that does not fly with me" "If I were you I would march over to his office right now" "And give him a piece of my mind" "Oh Betty's not the type to do something like that" "You know what, I'm going to" "Wow, aren't you full of surprises" "I just .." "I can't take another second of replaying last night in my head" "I'll go nuts, I just need to talk to him" "Right after you buy us lunch" "That's Matt's building" "I don't know what I'm gonna say to him" "What am I gonna say to him?" "Oh well you better think fast cause Richie Rich just left the building" "No, Amanda!" "Someone's not working through lunch, we should follow him" "No guys, I'm not gonna do that" "Well if you don't, then we will" "No, no, Amanda, Marc!" "It's kinda silly, guys slow down" "Oh god" "This is stupid, why are we doing this" "I know, I just wanna finish this episode of mex in the city" "And get something to eat, my stomach is eating itself" "The bagel has landed" "Hey" "Oh-my-god, he is totally two-timing you" "There must be an explanation for this" "Agh, let's get this show on the road, I'm starving" "Betty?" "Betty what are you doing here?" "Oh it's a beautiful day" "Matt, hey, hi" "I didn't mean to follow you" "I'm just still a little confused about last night and .." "If you're with her that's fine, I mean it's not fine but .." "Oh god, I wish I wasn't here right now" " I'm Helen" " My therapist" "Why don't you join us?" "Betty sorry I said I have to work through lunch" "I just needed to see Helen" "I don't know what I'm supposed to say" "You can say, or not say anything you wanna say or not say" "Ok .." "So um, about last night" "Look Matt, it was my fault" "I was trying to push you into doing something you obviously don't wanna do so .." "No, no, no, that's not it at all" "Matt, it's fine, just tell me if you're not attracted to me" "Or if you'd rather just stay friends" "No, I am attracted to you" "Well then was it" "Oh god, this is so embarrassing" "Why?" "Oh, are you a virgin?" "That's okay I don't really have that much experience either" "Oh no, I've been with women" "And kind of a lot of women" "And really lot" "Wow" "Look, look I know this must sound weird" "It's just, I've been kinda lonely my whole life" "In the past Matt has used sex as a way to connect to people" "So I made a contract with Helen that I wouldn't be with someone" "Until I really connected with them first" "And .." "This amazing thing happened, I met you" "And I started having all these feelings" "And then when the sex came up I guess I just .." "I just panicked" "And how do you feel now?" "Calm, I feel calm" "Good" "I'm so glad it's out in the open" "And Betty how do you feel?" "Great, I feel .." "Strange" "Matt's been with hundreds of women?" "Well he didn't say hundreds but he's definitely pointing in that direction" "Man what a dog!" "Not really helping, I know" "No you're not, can we change the subject" "Your car's coming to pick you up to take you straight to the poetry club from here" "Great, you're coming right?" "Yeah, I'll be there, I'm excited to hear Molly read her poem" "Oh she's not gonna read that one anymore" "Why?" "It's so beautiful" "I asked her not to" "What?" "Well you saw what it was about" "I can't exactly have her reading stuff about our sex life in front of everyone I work with" "Daniel, sorry to break it to you" "But your sex life has kinda been on display for years" "Come on, that's different" "Why?" "Because you don't mind people knowing that you're a playboy" "But you don't want anyone to know that you cry when you're with the woman you love?" "Okay, you're making me sound like an ass" "Well you kind of are" "I'm sorry, but Molly's sick, and she wrote a poem about how much she loves you" "And she's brave enough to stand up in front of strangers and say that" "You can be brave enough to let her" "So we talked it through and Archie's coming over" "Hilda, you called a guy back and apologized?" "Wow, you must really like this Archie" "I know!" "Something happened last night," "It's like we really .." "We really connected you know" "Can we maybe not talk about sex tonight?" "Oh honey, you and Matt you're gonna be fine" "I don't know Hilda" "I mean a couple of days ago I was ready to spend the night" "And now I hope it doesn't even come up" "Honey he talked to his shrink about you" "Obviously you're important to him" "It's just complicated, now I'm one of hundreds" "I don't feel very special" "Agh wouldn't it be great if all of life's problems could be solved with good hair" "Alright cover up" "That must be Archie, come in" "Felicia, what are you doing here?" "I came to tell you to back off my man" "Excuse me?" "I decided I want Archie back" "Oh, sorry you can't have him" "No offense but you can't stop me" "Archie loves him some Vanilla ice cream" "Okay you know maybe .." "Well no offense, but I don't think Archie's gonna go back to vanilla" "When he has tasted hot, melted, caramel surprise" "What's the surprise?" "Your fat ass?" " Oh No you didn't" " No, no Hilda, she didn't mean that" "Oh yes I did, and I also meant to do this" "Oh bitch" "How do you like that" " Hope you like eggs cause your head's about to look like one" " No, no" "Is that all you got?" "At least let me get these eyebrows" "You're gonna hurt somebody" "Stop, stop!" "Are you crazy?" "What the hell is going on here?" "It's so chilly in here, do you mind if I start a fire?" "Sure" "Oh it looks like you have a little something on your shirt" "Oh I guess the baby spit up a little" "It's no big deal" "Oh nonsense, let me wash it, I was just about to do a little laundry" "Okay" " Thank you" " You're welcome, thank you!" "Thank you, thank you" "Hey hey, I'm really glad that we talked with Helen today" "I mean it was weird, but I'm glad" "Yeah yeah me too" "Who's that?" "Oh she works at the coffee shop near my apartment" "Hey hey, it's the only place I know her from in case you're wondering" "What?" "No, no, I wasn't wondering anything" "Your shirt will be done soon" "So in the mean time why don't we .." " Are you okay?" " I'm fine" "And there I sit wrapped oh so tight against the night" "In my insecurity, like it" "Molly, hey I'm so sorry about what I said before" "This poem you wrote is beautiful and it's touching" "And I'd be so proud to hear you read it tonight" "You would?" "Molly, you're up" "Get em, take it" "I'm just so angry at myself I knew I shouldn't have let Connor in" "It was against every instinct I had" "Now I can't get his stupid face out of my dreams" "Shh, that's it, that's it, let it out" "I don't wanna let it out, I just wanna have sex" "Uh, I didn't, I didn't .." "Oh just take your pants off" "I don't think what you need is sex" "What I think you need is to find a way to close the door on this Connor guy" "And focus on your baby" "Well thank you James" "I think you really helped me" "And since we won't be having sex, now you're fired" "Get out .." "Out" "Oh great thank you" "Betty, Betty you're okay?" "Sorry, I'm gonna go say bye to Daniel" "Did you finally get rid of her?" "Yeah and don't worry Felicia won't bother you anymore I promise" "Oh I know" "So what's going on here?" "Yesterday you're not into me and today you're fighting for me" "I thought I wasn't your type" "Ok, I know it was a really dumb thing to say" "Especially since my type hasn't really worked out for me so well" "I just wanted to see what it would be like you know with a nice guy" "Hilda I like you but I'm sorry to warn you I have a type too" "I think I sorta go for the bad girls" "You think I'm a bad girl?" "Well maybe I'm a little bad but.." "You loved it, two girls going at it over you" "Please, I'm a grown man, I hardly think I need to get my thrills .." " You loved it" " I know it was really hot" "So what are we saying?" "We're giving us another chance?" "Yeah" "And oh by the way, I'm not always such a nice guy" "I know" "I'm home" "Oh my god Imma start ringing the bell" "I liked Molly's poem" "Yeah" "Does Daniel cry at work too?" "Not everyday" "So I guess I should get a cab" "Wait Betty wait, I was thinking maybe you could come back to my place" "See my new wall color, I mean if you want" "Matt, I don't know" " You're freaked out" " Yeah" "I just .." "I wanted to be special and .." "I'm sorry but right now I just .." "I feel like a number" "You are!" "Number one" " Come on, Matt I'm serious" " No so am I" "Betty, this would be the first time that I have ever been with a woman I really care about" "So technically, you are my first" "Aww, that's so corny and sweet" " I make myself nervous my hands are shaking" " No, don't worry, so are mine" "This one goes out to the woman I love" "A classic from my high school battle of the bands" "We're driving down the highway" "Cold wind in my hair" "Just me and my special lady" "We haven't got a care .." "In the world" "But the road ahead's uncertain, there'll be bumps along the way" "And I know there'll be some hurting so I hit the gas and pray" "Well I don't wanna crash and burn" "Don't wanna go too fast" "Wanna be with you, wanna see this through" "I don't wanna crash and burn" "Don't wanna go too fast" "I want to be with you" "Wanna make this last forever" "And ever my lady" "Made by Nazel"