"I feel like a fucking burglar, after that funeral scene." "You're sure it's OK that I go in there alone?" "I want to remember him the way he was with mom." "Give me a couple of hours." "Thanks for your patience and the bed Eva" "Anybody could see that I was on the verge of a breakdown." "But I wasn't just anybody." "Thanks!" "You look more and more like your dad." "My dad?" "You knew my dad?" "Nobody knew your dad." " Are you going on a trip?" " Life's a journey, Malin." " I read you book the other day." " Really?" "Did you like it?" "Yes." "Interesting to note how many women Dr. Dag Steelhead had sex with." "Very exciting fetish, breakdown sex." "Do you think so?" "Yes." "Hi, there." "Look at that." "Coffee?" "Tea?" "Perrier?" " No thanks." " Nothing." "I'll be right back." "Call Marianne and ask her to fix me up with three girlfriends." " Are you kidding?" " I never kid with you." "But no more than three at a time." "I'm not entirely nuts." " Trouble in paradise?" " We've decided to get a divorce." " We?" "So you're in agreement on this?" " Yes." "Not quite sure?" "There might be some love left hiding under a rock." "No, we're sure." "If you could give us a receipt, showing we'd been here, we'll get out of your hair." "I'm sure you've got better things to do." "A death certificate for a ruined relationship." "A marriage reduced to a notarized document." "And they make it sound like they've come up with something original." " Hello?" " Hello?" "This is just too stupid." "You'll get your receipt." "I just want us to talk first." "Tell me about every little thing you did together, and enjoyed." "Hi!" "We miss you a lot." "I had to get away." "It's about time to..." " How are you?" " I'm not sure." "I don't throw up as much, and I'm feeling better." "What was I going to tell you..." "Oh yes, that Swedish tour guide?" " Anders?" " Yes, Anders." "He's in town." "He said he'd call you." " You kidding me?" " Listen, I've gotta run." "Take care of yourself." "There you go." "Enter." "If you could just print out a receipt to this lovely couple?" " And just send in the next ones." " Yes, of course." " Dag, your loonies are back." " They're all loonies." "Thanks to you, really." "Did they see me?" "They've seen me." "Are they armed?" "Don't think so." "Just fruit." "Here's your receipt." "Hi!" "Wow, it's you guys?" "Come on in." "Yes?" "Can I get you something?" "Coffee?" "Perrier?" " Herbal tea?" "Fruit?" " You might be wondering why we're here?" "You've ruined our lives." "There's an empty plate at our table." "And it's like a wall between us, a no-man's-land." "I'm sorry about the dog, but it's not coming back." "You want me to buy another dog?" "We don't want a new dog." "We want our lives back." "Now that Woofsie's gone, it's like we have nothing in common anymore." "He was our child." "Before we go any further:" "You're here for couples' counseling?" "We refuse to pay for this." "Sorry about the funeral." "We didn't know it was you father." "Let's call it even." "But with Woofsie gone, it's like we have nothing left." "He was like the dots in our respective yin and yang." "He was our baby, and now the baby's gone." "It's difficult to treat you when you're angry at me." "It's better if you talk to the panda." "Soft, kind, big, inviting,   monotonous diet, and immense procreational challenges." "But most importantly:" "It's not me." "Talk to the panda." "The panda listens." " You killed our child." "And with it, us." " Let's start with the most obvious." "There's a big difference between a child and a dog." "A dog loves you unconditionally, as long as you feed it." "This is the only form of love that's one hundred percent uncomplicated." "But it doesn't translate to human, self-destructive relations." "So don't ever compare a kid to a dog, OK?" "But if you value the love of a dog higher than..." "Let's not go there." "How can a man who says that the greatest love is that of a dog,   pick up a bundle of love and toss it out the window?" "Are you saying you could have thrown a baby out the window as well?" "I'm trying to help you out here!" "I'm trying to help you." "What the fuck do you think I am?" "Do you think I'm a monster who just throws a dog   out of the window because I don't have a baby?" "I know the difference between right and wrong." "Don't you think I know what it's like to have something, and then lose it?" "And to end up so alone that there's nothing left to lose?" "You want to talk about loneliness?" "This is where loneliness lives." "Not here." "OK?" "You've got each other." "Isn't that good enough?" "I think you might want to go check on him." " Dag, are you OK?" " Yeah." "Much better now." "Bozo and Gazy left their make-up behind." "But otherwise you're feeling all right?" "It's all good." "Trying to think positive." "Benedikt called." "He's laying outside your door." "And Marianne confirmed a date for you at nine." "I'll get home, then." " It's Anders." " Hi, Anders." "It's been a long time." " I heard you were here." " Eva?" "Yes, it's been a while." "How are you doing?" " Good." " So what are you up to?" "I'm staring into the wall of an empty apartment." "I have a hard time imagining that." "Listen, I'm off tonight." "Want to get together?" "Want a beer, Benedikt?" " Please don't fuck my door, Benedikt." " The daughter of a friend." "I know you don't like visitors, so I said she couldn't come in." "Check." "You need professional help." "I miss Mia." "I've got some things to do." "I'm glad you came by." " But was it good?" " Spectacular." "I'll call you later." "See you." " Sporty of her, no?" " I'm worn out." " Sick and tired." " Of me?" "Yes, you too." "Of my job, of therapy, of helping people." "Lots to do?" " That's not it." "It just feels pointless." " People need your help." "They don't want to make the decision themselves." "It's much easier for them to have me tell them that all hope is lost." " When did you become like this?" " What do you mean?" "When you started, you did everything to make people stick together." "I don't know." "There's nothing in that head of yours you haven't turned upside down." "Anna Lena Stenseth." "I don't think I know who that is." "Do I?" "They've been to see me a few times." "Both of them." "She wanted out, he wanted another chance." "I knew something was wrong with him, but my job was to keep them together." "So I told them how bright their future was, and all." "A month later, she got half her face bashed in." "First with his fist, then a golf club." "She'd forgotten to buy bread or something." "He crashed himself to death shortly afterwards." "That was hardly your fault." "It must have taken a lot of courage for her to come see me." "That was the first time I thought:" "Maybe this is all wrong." "Some people never get a fair shot at it, Dag." "Your mom makes a mistake, and you make the same mistake." "And I'm sure that was the case for both of them." "I've seen it a million times, and it sucks to high heaven,   but it's not your fault." "No." "I need Mia." " Yes, I suppose you do." " I do." "I'll set you up for a session." " You're serious?" " Yes." "You want the 2010 edition, or Super-Dag from '98?" "Super-Dag." "Right, then." " Where are you off to now?" " The 2010 edition has a date." "Hi." "Dag." "Trine." "Sorry, you're getting hit with all this smoke." "Second hand smoke is the latest thing." "It's got all the benefits of smoking, and none of the negatives." "The benefits are reduced sperm vitality." "Yes, I think I've gotten some of that, too." " Shall we?" " Yes." "What are you saying?" "Theo, I'll be there in fifteen." "Mom, it's no big deal." "He's not going anywhere." "He passed out on the floor." " Just sit tight." "I'll be there in fifteen." " I didn't want this to be a big thing." "15 minutes." "And turn him on his side in case he vomits." " You're not some kind of health nut otherwise?" " You're thinking of smoking?" "I'm more mechanically minded, and a pill popper." "If you can boost your health through machinery of pills, that's more me." "And you?" "I'm a marine biologist." "My specialty is sexual development in farmed halibut." "That's a Pez dispenser?" "The Austrians gave us Fritzl, Hitler, and the Pez dispenser." " The Austrians?" " Yep, and they invented the dildo." " The Austrians invented the dildo?" " And the film projector." "Here's the thing..." "Penny for your thoughts?" "I was just thinking we need to do some drinking." " Do you have something particular in mind?" " "Lots", is that a cocktail?" "Probably mom." "Sorry, I couldn't hear you." "We're playing..." "Jesus, Theo, you're scaring me half to death here." "Go wait in the car." "You too." "Wait in the car." " Let me just finish..." " Vanilla Ice!" "The car, now." "What are you doing?" "This is what you did when you wanted to look young." "Now you look like a brat too." "Both your ears are pierced." "Don't get drunk in front of our son, ever again." "I'll leave the hammer here." "Good night." "Thanks." "Mommy's had a bit too much to drink." "There you go." "You'll be all right, then?" "Yes." " Want me to help you?" " No." "Thanks for a lovely evening." "And the food." "Well, technically, you returned the food." ""With Gene Kelly, Donald O'Conner, and Debbie Reynolds."" ""Romantic musical from 1952, with some comedy."" ""Anne's favorite movie." "She found Kelly very elegant."" ""I was more into Debbie Reynolds."" ""She was 19 when they made the movie, but 25 when I saw it."" ""But now I can see that Kelly is elegant."" ""It strikes a nice balance between the plot and the musical numbers."" ""The script was written after the songs."" ""But you can't tell from watching it.""