"Here's what I learn my first day at medical school... think long and hard before choosing to become a surgeon." "It takes 100% commitment." "This is killing me." "I need coffee." "Four days back to work, and I'm ready to end it all." "I don't even know how we survive four days." " Coffee's on!" " That's how." "You have to be on your "A" game every single time you walk into that O.R." "When patients are lying on your table completely at your mercy, they need to know that when you make that first cut... you know what you're doing." "No other specialty requires the time, the focus, the complete dedication... except maybe being a mom." "Okay, so daddy is gonna drop you off at day care, and I am going to pick you up, okay?" "Then we'll have a princess tea party" " at the end of the day." " Okay, ladies, let's go." "Wow." "We're good at this." "Oh, pump!" "Yeah." "Oh!" " Okay." "Mwah!" " Mwah." "Maybe we're too good at this." "James Evans, 57, post-op day 6 from an emergent tricuspid valve replacement" " due to endocarditis." " Hey, could you change it to "Jimmy"?" "And go ahead and fix the age, while you're at it, to something in the 40s." "Deep breath." " Is that thing you put in there still working?" " I think you're good." "The new valve should last 10 to 15 years." "Dr. Wilson's going to do a treadmill stress echocardiogram" " just to be thorough." " Thanks, doc." "Anything to get me out of this dress." "Okay." "Oh." "U.N.O.S. has a possible match on one my transplant patients." " Uh, page me with his results." " Okay." " Looking at your dad's chart?" " He's not my dad." "That's why I took my mom's last name." "So there's nothing connecting me to the guy." " He's funny." " Yeah?" "You should talk to him." "Tell him who you are." "Maybe he's changed." "You've changed." "The last time I saw his face," "I was punching him so hard, I could have killed him." "I'm just afraid I'll pick up where I left off." "Hey!" " You're doing a heart/liver on Samantha Calder?" " Yep." "I saw her before I went on leave." "I'm the one who diagnosed the familial hypercholesterolemia." " Oh, well, you were right." " So let me take the liver." " Really?" " Yeah, really." "Why didn't you think of me in the first place?" "I guess I thought you were easing back in?" "I don't ease back in." "I jump in the deep end." " I swim." " All right." "Uh, well, have you read the Cleveland article on simultaneous heart/liver transplants under C.P.B.?" "I have not." "Is it different from a regular heart/liver?" "I will read it." "Hey, you're doing a heart/liver?" "Yeah." "Uh, but I don't need you." "You paged me." "You stole my liver?" "Uh... come on." "I deserve this." " I've been on the bench for months." " You deserve nothing." "I named my son after you." "You can't be mad at me." "Your son is the devil's spawn." "He drinks the milk of a liver thief!" "Morning, Dr. Kepner," " Dr. Robbins." " Mm." "Hi." "Coffee?" "I thought you could use it before your big surgery with Dr. Shepherd." "Oh." "That's... nice." "What did I do?" "Something nice, apparently." "I didn't get a coffee." "No." "No." "I think I actually did something really, really bad." "I think that I brought her back to my apartment" " the night of the gala." " You think?" "I don't know." "I was drunk." "I barely remember even getting home." "And then I have a vague memory of her in my kitchen." "And now she's being really friendly." "Did I flirt with her that night?" "Uh, all I remember is waking up in my bathtub with my spanx still on." "Oh, well, at least we know you're good." "Oh." "Hey, um, some mortgage slips for the apartment came." "Oh." "Okay." "You're welcome." "You want me to thank you for giving me the mortgage slips to my apartment that you're living in?" "Listen, if you want me to move out, just say so." "I don't want to live in the apartment that I shared with my cheating wife." "I gotta go." "Thanks!" " I think I overslept." " What do you think?" "Of?" " My shirt?" " Yes." "You're introducing me to your mother." "I need to make a good impression, so I am going for," ""Yes, I am an intern dating your son"" ""who is a fellow and a member of the board and an Avery."" ""But before you write me off as a gold digger,"" ""you need to know I am a kick-ass surgeon,"" ""and your son is lucky to be dating me."" "That is a lot of pressure to put on a shirt." "Oh, it's not working alone." "There's a lip gloss in my locker that'll assist." "Oh, yeah." "Well, she is gonna love you." " Mm." "Not-not here." " Hmm?" " What?" " Stop." "We're not those people." "Oh, I know." "Yeah." "Banana bread." "I'm starving..." "Mmm." "Help yourself." "I was too busy feeding my family breakfast and getting my sister wife's breast pump packed" " to feed myself this morning." " So... you have a sister wife?" "Derek and Meredith and I are in a relationship." "Huh." "I used to dance in my underwear." "And I thought I'd get back to that when I left Arizona." "Instead I walked right into "big love."" "I rebounded to the McDreamys." "Mm." " Hmm, hang glider trauma?" " Yeah." "Where did you get this?" "It's amazing." " It's good, right?" " Mm-hmm." " Emma made it." " Mmm." " Fetal surgeon Emma from the gala?" " Mm-hmm." "Oh, my god." "You're rebounding, too." "Mm." "Yeah." " What have we got?" " Her name is Reese Woods, 22." "Hang gliding over tiger mountain," "B.P.'s 100/70, open tibia fracture, and complains of abdominal pain." "Can I say, "I told you so," now, Reese?" "Who's this?" " Oh, that's Donna." "She's the sister." " Mm." "Although she acts like she's my mother." "I am not doing this again." "I'm not watching you try to kill yourself." "It's just a little break." "Don't be so mad." "Okay, this isn't bone." "This is a rod." "When did you have this rod put in?" "This March." "She broke it heli-skiing in New Zealand." "She's also broken, uh, both forearms, lost a kidney, dislocated her shoulder." "Wow, you really do have a death wish, huh?" "I guess I'm just making up for lost time." "I'm seeing a lot of free fluid in Morrison's pouch." "We're gonna need to get her up to C.T. stat." "Okay, now show Catherine your party trick, sir." "Yeah." "Oh!" "Oh, he's acting all too cool for school right now." "But yesterday, when he made it to the chair, he was smiling from ear-to-ear." " Okay, okay." " Okay." "Oh!" "You are doing so well!" "I think you'll be doing laps by next week." "Excuse me, sir." "Your, uh, drain output has been a little low, and we were told to come by to strip your J.P." "We can come back later if this isn't a good time." "Well, I actually wanted to talk with Dr. Bailey." "so right now is a great time." "I need a hand to get back in bed." "Well, what are you two waiting for?" "Help the man!" " Oh, yeah." " Of course." "Okay." "I was expecting more." "But he couldn't sit up two days ago." "He's depressed." " Have you considered antidepressants?" " Of course I have." "And he refuses." "He says he's fine, and he is." "He needs time, support, and more pillows if he's ever gonna be able to sit up comfortably." "I'm gonna go get those." "Miranda..." "I'm so sorry." "You've done so much, and I am grateful." "I'm here to help." "So let me." "All right." "Pillows." "Oh, my god!" "Oh..." "Hi." "Jackson... where are your manners?" "Mom, this is Stephanie Edwards." "Steph, this is my mom." "Dear, would you mind handing me the pillows from the top bunk?" "Okay." "Mm." " I don't think she liked my shirt." " Mm." " Ma, hold on." " You are aware that you're on the board of this hospital, as well as an Avery." "You don't know what I went through" " to get these pillows." " Meant to lock the door." "Good morning, sir." "How are you feeling today?" "He's a mess." "Who taped this I.V.?" " It's fine." " Maybe it was Edwards." "Her mind's obviously not on patient care." " That is not fair, mom." " This is not me being a prude." "I like sex just as much as the next person." " Oh, god, please." " But there is a time and there's a place." " He said he meant to lock the door." " You be quiet." "Where are your compression socks?" "They went to get another pair." " Maybe they got distracted by Edwards' breasts." " And I'm out." "I'm just looking out for you." "Hey, Sam." "Dr. Grey... where's your baby belly?" "It turned into a baby boy." "Congratulations." "I would show you a picture, but he's so cute, you may have another heart attack." "Oh." " She's had a bunch of them." " Not recently, though." " I think the yoga music helps." " Absolutely." " He hates the music." " I loved it..." " Hmm-hmm." " For the first few months." "Well, now that we're getting you a new heart and liver, you can flip out like the rest of us." "And have a baby, like Dr. Grey." "Or be a ground-breaking surgeon, like Dr. Yang." "I'm a surgeon, too." "Oh, yeah." "Of course." "Dr. Grey does it all." "It's so impressive." " I don't know how you handle everything." " I don't know either sometimes." " What?" " Did you want to examine the patient?" "Oh." "Hello, Mr. Samuels." "I'm Dr. Edwards." "It says here you haven't been able to urinate since yesterday." "Let's take a look." "Wow-wow." "Uh, it's no wonder you can't urinate." "Your penis is quite swollen." "I think I got a bug bite." "That's a big bug bite." "It's... more of a bee sting than a bug bite." "Still pretty swollen for a bee sting." "Do you have a history of allergies?" "It wasn't really one bee." "It was several." "Well, what's several?" "I don't know... 25?" "30?" "30 bees?" "I know." "It's crazy, right?" " Hmm?" " But see, it was Saturday, and we have this hammock in the backyard." "And I thought I'd make some lunch." "So I took my pants off and..." "made a honey sandwich." "Wh... a honey sandwich?" "Peanut butter and honey sandwich." "'Cause who eats a honey sandwich, right?" " Right." " And I was eating the honey sandwich." "And I fell asleep." "And I guess I got some honey on... myself." "And the bees caught the scent." "Okay." "Mm-hmm." "Well, I'm gonna get you a dose of I.V. Benadryl and a steroid." "And then we're gonna get you a catheter so you can pee." "Dr. Edwards." "Would it make a difference if it were hornets?" "The patient is a 14-year-old male..." "All right, one second." "Excuse me." "Fourth day back, and I'm already scrubbing in on a heart/liver transplant with Cristina." " Well, fantastic!" " Yeah." "Can you pick up the kids this afternoon?" "I would, but I have to entertain all of them." "They're visiting neurosurgeons watching my A.V.M." " Qa after." " I promised Zola a princess tea party." "Have Callie do tea." "It was supposed to be me, or in a pinch, you." "It's so she knows that she hasn't been replaced in our hearts by a new baby brother or by a multi-organ transplant." "It's an over-determined tea party." "I'll talk to Callie." "I didn't realize I'd have to work this hard" " to get out of here." " Five more minutes." "I lost out on three gigs since I've been in here." "If I can play tonight, maybe this trip won't be a total wash." "Do you have any family or anyone I can call" " To come pick you up?" " No, I'm good." "How about I make a call to a rehab clinic?" "Don't you worry about me, darlin'." "I know I had some junk in my system when I came in here, but I'm a recreational user." "Your left arm, right arm, and the backs of both your knees tell a different story." "It took me half an hour to find a usable vein on you." "I know what you're gonna do when you leave here." "I've got people I can call." "I got family." "I don't think you do." "Or maybe you did, but I think that you're on your own now." "Well, you know all about me, don't you?" "I know that we have you on methadone right now, which is a big step towards recovery." "Let's just try to keep it going somewhere..." "Kid, I play blues guitar." "I'm not Christina Aguilera." "I can't afford those places, not the good ones." "Let me make some calls for you, please." "Boy... you are as persistent as you are annoying." "You can walk as fast as you want, but you're not going anywhere." "Neither am I." "What is wrong with Callie?" "She still hasn't called me back." "Ooh!" "Ooh!" "Ah, the recovery team texted, two minutes until they open the donor." "Hey, Ross?" "Could you run down to the E.R. and ask Torres if she can pick up the kids today?" "Sure, but I have to get this blood to the lab..." "And remind her about the princess tea party." "It has to be today." "Well, that's pretty cool." "The tea party?" "Yeah." "I mean, it's just apple juice and cookies, but she's excited about it." "Not the tea party." "You and me doing ground-breaking surgery..." "That was the idea when we started." "Yeah." "It's pretty cool." " Do you need to go pump?" " No, I'm fine." "You're holding your boobs." "But we're having a moment." "I don't want to spoil it." " Mer... your boobs are exploding." "Go pump." " Thank you." " So she might lose the kidney?" " Whoa, whoa, whoa, let's..." " let's not jump ahead." " No, please." "Worst-case scenario." "I like to be prepared." "Well, the worst-case scenario is she needs a kidney." "So we start to look for a donor." "Okay." "Well, that's me." "I'm her donor." "So you've been through this before?" "Oh, yeah." "Yeah." "Take your pick... bone marrow, blood, uh, liver, anything you can think of, I've given." "What's mine is hers." "Except I haven't given a kidney yet." "So..." "Yay!" "Sounds like she's extremely accident-prone, even for a daredevil." "No." "All the parachuting and stuff... it started when she went into remission." "My sister was diagnosed with aplastic anemia" " when she was 2." " Well, that must have been hard." "It was lucky that you were a match." "Oh, it wasn't luck." "I'm a donor baby." "You're her younger sister." "Yeah." "My parents only had me to save her." "Aah!" "How did that happen?" "It's a long story." "Can you see any access to get the catheter in?" "No, it's too swollen." "It looks like it was mauled by a pissed off badger." "You should have seen it before the I.V. Benadryl kicked in." "Aah!" "We need to get someone from urology down here now." "Don't you think I tried?" "There's an emergency, and the on-call guy is 20 minutes away." "Dr. Wilson, it feels like I might explode." "I don't think he's gonna last 20 minutes." "Dr. Avery, I'm..." "Darling, save your breath." "There is nothing you can say after this morning" " to get in my good graces." " I have a giant penis." "No, not me." "I don't have a gi..." "I'm a girl." "Uh..." "I have a patient, and he has a giant penis." "It's the biggest one I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of..." "You make me nervous." "I need a consult." "Better go take a look." "This rod caused a lot of bleeding." "We're gonna be here a while." " I hope you don't have plans with your girlfriend, Hunt." " She's not my girlfriend." "She baked you banana bread and brought it to you at work." "You're practically engaged." "Matthew brought me breakfast burritos, and now we're getting married." "Just saying." "Damn it." "The superior pole of this kidney is almost completely avulsed, and the pedicle is gonna need some repair." "You think the sister's prepared to consider donation?" "She can't seem to say no." " Dr. Torres?" " Hmm?" "Dr. Grey is going into surgery." "She wants to know if you can pick up her kids at 3:00." "She said to mention promising Zola a princess tea party?" "Tell her I'll be out of here by... 6:00." "So she can't say no." "Oh, my god." "You're right." "I need to get a life." "You know what?" "Maybe I should kick Arizona out" " and move back into my place." " But she needs the elevator." "And it's right across the street from the hospital, which is perfect for her." "We drank three bottles of champagne and puked." " It bonds you." " Mm-hmm." "Plus it's already been retrofitted" " to be handicap-accessible." " Kepner..." "I'm shutting up." "No, no." "Look at the kidney." "We're gonna need some laps" "And a vascular clamp." "Kepner, get the 4-0 prolene stitch." "Mm-hmm." "Of course, now my mom's convinced that Stephanie is some kind of gold digger, trying to use sex to nab herself an Avery." "Dude, you and your rich boy problems." "You know what the worst part is?" "I think she actually likes Stephanie." "Well, so then you need to tell your mom that." "Stand up for your girl." "That wouldn't work." "She'd just hate her even more." " So what are you gonna do?" " Nothing." "You know, it's like walking into a hornet's nest." "You know, you gotta stay still, let the whole frenzy die down." "How you doin' with that coffee, Karev?" "You wanna make the damn coffee?" "Be my guest." "It's a freakin' crap machine." "What's wrong with him?" "Beats me." " Alex just broke the coffee machine." " You're dead to me." "Dr. Yang just got a call from..." "Oh, god." "I'm sorry." "Oh, Shane, all my parts are covered." "You can turn around." "I'm fine looking at the wall." "Oh!" "Um, organs are good." " Let's go tell Samantha." " She's lactating." "I need 10 minutes." "I have 4 more ounces to go." "Uh, okay." "Page me when you're done." "Oh, Dr. Torres is in surgery." "She can't get the kids until 6:00 at the earliest." "6:00 is too late for a tea party." "Tea time is at 4:00." "Do you want me to tell that to Dr. Torres?" "No, it's just that I promised." "Just forget it." "Forget it." "There will be other tea parties." "Well, this is how it starts." "I make a promise." "I break it." "Ten years later, I'm my mother, and Zola's snorting oxy behind the school." "Nice." "You know, it goes faster when you do both sides at the same time." "How about I quiz you?" "I thought you hated me." "I do." "So hook up the pump before I change my mind." "Dr. Robbins discovered the spinal A.V.M." "when the patient was 12." "It has since grown." "We are going to use a far lateral retroperitoneal..." " Excuse me." " Yes." "You suggested a posterior approach?" "Why go anteriorly?" "Did I say that?" "Well, I also said the segway was gonna hit big, but, uh... anyway, that... that theory has been elaborated." "Excuse me." "Sorry." "Pardon me." "Who knew Dr. Shepherd was such a big shot?" "What are you doing here?" "You told me to scrub in." "The night of the gala?" "At your house, remember?" " Oh, yeah." " That night was so fun." "Yeah." "Don't worry." "I won't tell anyone what happened." "Hey, um..." "It's a little tight in here." "Uh, you could probably be more useful managing patients on the floor." "Oh." "Yeah." "You're probably right." "Okay, sweet girl, just one more." "That's it." "Shh..." "Shh, shh." " Stop." " Stop what?" "Doing that... making that dog face." "It's puppy dog eyes, and I'm not." "These are my regular eyes." " What do you want?" " Your dad passed his stress test." " Yang told me to discharge him." " Good." "Say it." "I never had a father." "I made up, like, 15 versions of one... a college professor who would read to me, a plumber who snuck me into movies." "Like, three doctors, one who would take me to feed the ducks in Boston commons." "I want to cry when I think about it, and I made it up." "I wanted one so badly." "Alex, you have a father." "I know, and he's a dirtbag, and I didn't make that up." "Just discharge him." "Then, uh, he woke up, and hornets were stinging him." "Just on his penis?" "Accidentally?" "Um... yeah?" "Young man, did you put your penis in a hornet's nest?" "No." "Maybe." "Yes!" "Get another 50 of fentanyl for the pain." "When there's no access for a catheter, you need to go directly into the bladder." "Any intern should know that." "Let's just pray we're not too late." "What happens if we are?" "Hey, something just happened." "I-I feel like I don't have to pee anymore." "That." "The bladder bursts." "There's a moment of relief and then..." "Book an O.R." "Get Dr. Hunt to extend me privileges." "I am going to the O.R." "One of your fine young residents just let a man's bladder explode." "Which resident?" "The one who was so busy shaking her tail in front of my son." " Oh, Edwards isn't dumb." " You're right." "She's strategic." "Jackson is dumb." "Catherine..." "I'm going to go and salvage this patient's manhood." "But when I come back," "I want to have a serious conversation with you about coming home with me." "Sorry." "I came to see if your drain output picked up after we stripped it, but..." "I can come back later." "You're not progressing very quickly here." "They're all in love with you, and afraid of you." "So they're coddling you." "It's very sweet, but ultimately a disservice." "You need to push yourself." "You need someone to push you." "This is a long road, and the slower you go down it, the poorer your chances are." "I love you, but I will not coddle you." "I never learned how." "Come here." "Just think about it." "Please?" "You're a goddess." "I know." " This is Grey." " Dr. Grey..." "It's Karen at the day care center." "Zola took a spill off the slide, and she nicked the side of her head." " She's probably going to need a few stitches." " Is she able to stand?" " Did she ever lose consciousness?" " What happened?" " I'm a teacher..." " She cut her head open." " Well, go." "I'll tell Yang." " Okay." "So tell Cristina to go ahead and talk to Samantha without me," " and I will meet her in the O.R." " Okay." "Poor baby." "All right." "I got a quick consult on a Stevens Johnson syndrome, and then I'll be right in to check in on my mother's penis." "I mean, the patient's penis that my mom asked me to consult on." "Why couldn't she have been a hand specialist or ears or something?" "Does it really have to be you and me and your mom all staring at a penis?" "It is not that loaded for her." "Okay, it's her work." "She loves it." "Just ask her questions and make it medical." "She'll probably forget about me and you." "Honestly, she probably already forgot." "How nice to see the two of you together again, and all dressed this time." "I did it... 'cause I'm amazing." "Wait." "What are you doing?" "I'm discharged, right?" "Oh, no." "We're keeping you here overnight 'cause I got you 28 days at Somerville starting tomorrow." "It's a good center." "Strong program, great people, and they said that they would waive the fees for you." "I appreciate it." "Mm-hmm." " That's all right." " It's all set up." "And they're gonna come get you tomorrow..." "Why are you doing this?" "What is your deal here?" "I mean, you pull your strings for every itinerate junkie musician that shows up?" "You said that you would go if I set it up." " You said that you would go." " No, see, I never said that." "That's against my policy." "That's how you screw up." "You tell someone you're gonna do something, you set 'em up for disappointment." "That's how you lose your home... your family." "Make your children hate you." "Look, you're a sweet kid, and I don't even know you." "But I don't want to let you down, too." "All right?" "'Cause you'd never let me hear the end of it, you damn nag." "Jimmy, if you keep going the way that you are going..." "I appreciate your concern... more than I can say." "Just take care now." "You can help." " Oh, my god." " He's leaving, and he's miserable, and he's full of regret about you." "And you're angry." "And you've always been angry." "And I think this could help you, too." "And I think it's your last chance because he's gonna go and use again," " and he's gonna die." " Look, don't talk to me about this again." "All right?" "Ever." " Oh, how's Zola?" " Oh, she'll be fine." "Once Grey gets down there, she'll stitch her up, and be back in time to scrub in." "It's happening again!" "Oh, she's desatting." "Uh, I'm gonna intubate." "Push 5 of versed and 100 of succinylcholine." " What happened?" " She's gone into heart failure again." "Check on the organs and book an O.R." "We're bring her down as soon as she's intubated." "Okay, got that closed up." "Now let me see." "Did I miss anything else?" "I don't see anything." "That's what's called a rhetorical question, my dear." "All right, let's take a look at this penis, shall we?" "Mm." "Uh, Dr. Avery, can you elaborate on some of your more interesting cases?" "I'm fascinated by all things penile." "Yes, I saw evidence of that earlier this morning." "How's it looking, dear?" "Well, it's possible he's gonna need a skin graft," " but nothing I can't fix." " Mm-hmm." "Yeah, he'll be able to stick it in a hornet's nest, an ant hill, a tarantula's..." "wherever they live." "Well, I find that men often put their penises in places that they don't belong." "Mm-hmm." "Suction, dear, come on." "Okay, supergirl." "That's the only ouch-y part." "Now you're not gonna feel anything at all." "You are so brave." "I'm so proud of you." "My patient's going into the O.R." " When?" " Right now." "It wasn't supposed to be for another hour at least." "Well, go ahead." "Uh..." "I'll have Jenna come in and hold her." "Doesn't that sound a little Ellis Grey to you..." "to leave my kid to go to surgery" " while she's getting stitches?" " You're a good mom, Mer." "Take it from me." "I had crap parents." "I know the difference." "Besides, she's not gonna be alone." "She's gonna be with me, who she loves more than her own parents." "I can't believe I'm doing this." "Yeah." "Can you send Jenna in here?" "Look, don't cry, or she will." "The general surgeons weren't able to repair" " your sister's kidney, so... we're gonna..." " Let's just cut to the chase." "Eventually, she's going to need a kidney." "Right?" "Okay." "Well, here I am." "Open the toolbox." "Take whatever she needs." "Hey, look, this doesn't have to happen right now." "Okay, sh-she'll be on dialysis until we find a donor." "You don't need to be spare parts for your sister anymore." "Here's what I need." "I need a boyfriend... and a job... and a Caribbean cruise... and I would like to learn to ride a bike, because I never learned to ride one when I was little." "I couldn't get injured 'cause Reese might need some body part." "And I'd love to not be spare parts for my sister anymore, but can I do that?" "Can I say no?" "Yes, you can say no." "It's your life." "You know, you should ride that bike." "Go on that cruise." "Get a boyfriend." "Dance in your underwear." "Yeah, you can say no." " I can say no." " Yeah, it feels good, right?" "I can say no!" "You can say no!" "No!" "No!" "No!" " No!" " No!" "No!" "No!" "Oh, sweetie." "I'm his wife." "I was out of town." " What happened?" " Well, he... came in with quite a few stings" " in his groin area." "And..." " Oh, no." "He didn't." "He stuck his penis in that hornet's nest, didn't he?" "You knew?" " How?" " I saw a nest on the eaves as I left." "I knew I should have had it removed." "So... this is something he's done before?" "He's someone who... likes a little pain with his pleasure." "Any kind of sting, really." "Bee, ant..." "I'm sure he was ashamed." "That's why it took him so long to come in." "I don't understand it either." "But it's just one thing." "There are 500 things about him... that are so much more interesting." "That is not possible." "Whew!" "I'm here." " What's she doing here?" " She's doing the liver." "I'm doing the liver." "She needed two staples." "I actually left her" " in the hands of Jenna... that nurse that..." " I don't care about Zola." "I'm thinking about the patient." " Whoa, dial it back for a second." " Does she have a concussion?" " No, she's fine." " Are you?" "You're gonna be worried about that and a hundred other things besides my patient and my liver." "She is my patient, and she was my patient before..." "Did you finish reading the article on performing simultaneous transplants completely under C.P.B.?" "Dr. Bailey knows the procedure." "Dr. Bailey is scrubbing in on my patient." "Sorry." "Probably should have checked back earlier." "Your... white blood cell count is elevated." "I'd like to start you on antibiotics." "Why do I need antibiotics?" "Because there's a left shift?" "You need to examine me to find out what's causing the elevation." "Murphy..." "I don't want to be coddled or pussy-footed around." "No offense." "It makes you a bad doctor and me a sicker patient." "So buck up, lift my gown and give me a proper hands-on exam." "Yes, sir." "It... feels distended." "Okay, what does that tell you?" " There could be fluid buildup." " Okay." "You're checking the drain?" "There's no output." "Okay, what else?" "You have epigastric tenderness, increased W.B.C., and little to no drain output, which means you have a..." " symptomatic pancreatic leak." " Okay." "Which also means I'm in a great deal of pain." "Now you need to try and unclog the drain with a Fogarty catheter so this doesn't happen again!" "God." "There's the bossy Richard I know and love." "They're gonna learn how to look me in the eye and explain to me what they're doing so I understand." "When I ask a question, they're going to answer it." "They're gonna figure out why my pancreas still requires a drain." "So I... take it you're not coming home with me." "These fools need me, Catherine." "Well, what if I need you, too?" "Come here." "You got me." "I'm right here." "Hey, going back to the tribe?" "After I grab Sofia." "How about you?" "Seeing your not-girlfriend?" "That was the plan, but I'm going to talk to the hang glider's sister." "She decided to donate a kidney after all." "Take it easy, pal." "How'd it go?" "Her initial labs look good." "She's, uh, headed down to the cardiac I.C.U." " if you want..." " You stole that surgery from me." "I'm sorry." "I really wish you could have been in there with me." "I worked my ass off to do that surgery with you, and you stole it from me." "That was low..." "Meredith, you were unprepared, you were unfocused, and you were late." "I didn't steal that surgery from you." "I rescued that surgery from you." " Oh, I..." " Because you couldn't do it." "I understand that you believe you are god's gift to medicine, but I am every bit as talented and competent a surgeon as you are." "No... you're not." "I'm sorry... but you're not." "And that's... that's okay." "You have different priorities now." "You cut back on your clinical hours, you log in less time in the O.R." "I mean, you don't do research, and I get it." "I mean, you have Zola and baby Bailey, and... and you want to be a good mom." "I don't believe you." "You are saying that I can't be a good surgeon and a mom." "Of course not." "Bailey is a mom, and she..." "I mean, she was fantastic in there today." " Then what are you saying?" " I'm saying..." "I'm s..." "Okay." "Bailey never let up." "Okay, she, like, lives here." "Callie never let up." "Ellis Grey never let up." "And I know you don't want to be your mother." "I'm saying..." "I'm saying... you and I started running down the same road at the same time, and at a certain point you let up." "You slowed down." "And don't say that I don't support that, because I do." "You made your choices, and they are valid choices." "But don't pretend they don't affect your skills." "You... are a very good surgeon." "It's..." "We're in different places now." "And that's... okay." "I mean, they were huge." "They were hard to hold." "Yeah?" "Yeah, they kind of hooked like that." " You see those people down there?" " Mm-hmm." "Those are the top 12 neurosurgeons in the world," " and they need a drink." " You got it." "Hey." "I am going to need my place back." "Look, I feel bad about kicking you out, but I need to stop taking care of other people." "I took care of you for a year." "I picked you up off the bathroom floor." "I took your abuse." "But you're not sick anymore." "Now you're just someone who cheated, and you did that to yourself." "So..." "I'm sorry, but I need my life back." "I need me back, and I need to do it tonight, or I'm afraid I'll change my mind." "So..." "I will have an intern pack up your stuff and bring it to the hospital tomorrow." "You can stay at my place." "Okay, you know what?" "Okay." "Just... just tell me, what did I do?" "What did we do?" "'Cause clearly something happened after the gala, and whatever it was..." "I'm sorry, I don't..." "Oh, my god." "I can't believe you don't remember." "Well, I was drunk, and you're pretty..." " We hung out." " Oh." "After I put you in the cab," "I called to see if you and Kepner made it home." "And you didn't answer, so I went to check." "And good thing, because you were passed out" " on the hallway floor." " Oh." "I helped you inside... and you insisted on having a dance party." "We made the most amazing grilled cheese sandwiches and ate them while we watched the films of Dr. Shepherd doing the spinal A.V.M.... which he did today... which is when you asked me to be there." "Oh." "It was the first time I felt like" "I found someone around here who got me." "Do you really not remember any of it?" "I vaguely remember the grilled cheese." "Let's go back to the part where you said I was pretty." "That part?" "Excuse me, Dr. Avery." "Do you have a minute?" "I'm meeting my son, Edwards." "It's been a long day." "I just think that we probably got off on the wrong foot." "Your feet were not the issue, dear." " I know how it looked." " I'm quite sure you don't." "No, I really do." "I was having a quickie with your son in the on-call room." "And it suggests I have no self respect." "I suggests that I, like much of my generation, don't understand that where we choose to have sex says a lot about what we think of ourselves." "And a lot of the work you did to break down barriers for women... and in particular, women of color... was a whole lot of wasted effort." "Mm." "I picked a shirt to wear today... because I knew I'd be meeting you..." "A really respectable one." "Meeting Jacskon's mother meant something to me." "I care about him." "And the shirt coming off in the on-call room... that was really, like, a joke about people who have sex in on-call rooms." "And that's the only thing you're gonna think of when you think of me now." "There are 500 other things about me that are so much more interesting than that." "Well, I will also think about the fact that you didn't put in a catheter" " until the man's bladder..." " Okay." "In all fairness, I wasn't getting all the information" " I needed to diagnose." " When in doubt, assume they put it someplace unimaginable and move on." "Oh, hey, um..." "I was just leaving." "Well, what's your hurry?" "I'm buying." "So..." "Sleep tight." "What if your focus splits?" "What if you can't be all in?" "Are you left with nothing at all?" "Maybe you just need to find a different path." "Hey!" "How's Zola?" "Karev filled me in." "Said she was a real champ." "She didn't get her princess tea party." "Wait." "I thought Callie was gonna do that." "Callie has moved out, and she was supposed to do the food shopping." "So now there's no food." "Zola has two stitches in her head and had cereal for dinner, and the house is a mess because I couldn't get the baby to sleep." "And she didn't get her princess tea party." "Why are you yelling at me?" "I had a big surgery." "So did I!" "But you didn't answer your phone." "She cut her head, and you didn't answer your phone." "So I had to go comfort her, which means that" "I didn't get to do my surgery... a heart/liver transplant." "Those never happen, and I didn't get to do it." " I'm sorry, but that is not my fault." " It is your fault" " Because you didn't answer your phone!" " I was in a surgery." "I shouldn't have to choose between being a good mother" " and being a good surgeon." " I never asked you to do that." "Never have I asked you to do that." "Here's what's horrifying... what if you can't give a hundred percent?" "Maybe you just need to go back to the beginning..." "And start all over again."