"Here's what you missed last week." "Emma and Ken are getting married, though she really likes Will." "If we were gonna rank crush-worthy teachers at this school... you'd be number one with a bullet." "Which Ken's kind of noticed... which makes him really not like Will." "The whole world knows I'm just a consolation prize to you." "How do you think that makes me feel?" " Also, Terri says she's pregnant." " Wow." "But really she's faking, and Mr. Schuester doesn't know." "This baby's the only reason he's still here." "Will's busy getting the kids ready for sectionals... where they're up against a school for the deaf." " I can't hear you." "Talk into this ear." "Scarlet fever." " You're on!" " And a group of juvie girls." " Aphasia, give Mr. Schuester his wallet back." "But it turns out both of them are really good." "It's like cool epilepsy." "Sue kicked Quinn out of the Cheerios because she's pregnant." "I can't have a pregnant girl on my squad." " You're a disgrace." " That's not very nice, but neither is Sue." "Those drinks are crap!" " And that's what you missed on..." " ¶¶ Glee ¶¶" " Hey, guys." "Mind if I join you?" " Hmm." " So, what's with all the primping?" " Yearbook pictures." "This is the 50th edition of the McKinley High School Thunderclap." "I'm gonna drop 20 pounds by Friday, look smokin' hot for that photo... and be down to a trim 210 for the wedding a week Saturday." "Of course the, um..." "the wedding was gonna be in Hawaii... but then they told me I couldn't bring my own fruit." " So..." " But sectionals is a week from Saturday." "Oh, man." "Looks like you won't be able to make it, MM." "I, um..." "I totally forgot about sectionals." "I'm-I'm sorry." "I wanted to go... for the kids." "We are not rescheduling." "The V.F.W. hall is booked till next June." "The only reason this Saturday is available... is 'cause it's the one-year anniversary of that grisly fish-fry shoot-out." "I got a monster discount." "We just got to be out of there before the candlelight vigil." "l-l..." "I remember." "Oh, my gosh." "Sue?" "Did someone finally punch you?" "Edie." "William." "You." "Every year when the photos for the Thunderclap come around..." "I always elect to have a little work done." "This year I got myself a bit of an eye lift." "And while they were in there, I told them to go ahead and yank out those tear ducts." "Wasn't using 'em." "You know, I got a storage unit full of trophies and medallions." "But for the rest of you educators... these yearbook pictures are really the only concrete proof you have... that anything you've done in your sorry little lives has made any difference whatsoever." "My Cheerios are so excited." "Got 'em on a yam diet." "Draws the water out of the skin." "Well, I'm sure my Glee kids are gonna be excited too." " Well, Glee kids don't get a photo." " What?" " Why is that?" " I just had a meeting with Principal Figgins, Eleanor." "And what with all the vandalism of the Glee Club photos over the years..." "I convinced him that putting the Glee kids in this year's Thunderclap... was subjecting the little freaks to more humiliation and ridicule." "Hey, why can't you just accept the fact... that my kids are gonna take sectionals this year?" " That's not happening." " And stop with the pointless vendetta." "All right, this is so not fair, Sue." "You know, I'm gonna talk to Figgins about this." "Hey, good luck with that." "You know, you three are boring me now." "I'm gonna go do something else." " Where's Rachel?" " She's not here yet." "Perfect." "Glee Club stands on a delicate precipice." "We have all felt the cold humiliation of a Slushee in the face." "But as of right now, our relative anonymity as a club... shields us from more severe persecution... swirlies, patriotic wedgies." "What's a patriotic wedgie?" "It's when they hoist you up the flagpole by your undies." "Strangely, it did make me feel more American." "Based on my investigation, I am of the opinion... that a yearbook photo would only fuel the flames of anti-Glee Club terror." "I've done a little library research." "Peter Geller..." "Glee Club second tenor, 1998." "He can be seen here with both a drawn-on Hitler mustache and a rice paddy hat." "Shortly after the yearbook came out, Mr. Geller had a nervous breakdown." "He's now the homeless man who sleeps in front of the public library." " Patches?" " Patches." " He barks at my mom." " Exhibit "B."" "Tawny Peterson." "Glee Club class of 2000." "Seen here in her photo with a cartoon knife stuck in her head... in a macabre tableau that in four years would prove eerily prescient." "I think I speak for all of us when I say... that not having to pose for a yearbook photo might be a blessing in disguise." "I suggest not fighting Figgins's ruling." "Oh, hey, guys." "Ah, looking at old Thunderclaps?" " It's really unsettling." " And totally unfair." "Hey, can I borrow one of these?" "You know what?" "This year's Thunderclap is gonna have a Glee Club photo... with every one of your smiling faces." "You have my word on it." "Schue, I'm doing the Glee Club a solid." "We're denying the opportunity to other children to further humiliate them." "No, no, no." "Those kids get up on stage all the time... no matter what anyone thinks of them..." "and they perform." "They don't let anyone or anything get to them." "That's something you should encourage." "Sue is wrong." " Fine." "I'll give them a photo." " Thank you." " For $1,000." " What?" "That's what it costs." "The yearbook is prime advertising space, Schue." "Frederickson's Funeral Parlor experienced a 1.3% increase in revenue... after their full-page ad last year in the Thunderclap." "Okay, um..." "What about a quarter page?" "How much does that cost?" "$325." "That will buy you enough space for a photo of two members of the Glee Club... right below the advertisement for Uncle Sandro's Chicken Inside of a Waffle." " Figgins, that's a lot of money." " It's a compromise, Schue." "Now, I suggest you select the good-looking cheerleader... not the pregnant one... and the quarterback for the photo... as their faces are less likely to be scratched out with safety pins." "Mr. Schuester, I'm very sorry to interrupt." "Principal Figgins, as you very well may know, this is my first year in Glee Club... and I've just been informed that New Directions has not been afforded a yearbook photo." "As you might expect, my two gay dads have a very close relationship..." " with our local branch of the A.C.L. U..." " Beat you to the punch, Rachel." "It's all good." "We're in the yearbook." "Oh." "Fantastic." "Thank you so much." "Make fun of me all you want, but school pictures are everything to me." "They're great practice for getting photographed by the paparazzi." "Invasive as the press may be, stars are dependent on them for their fame... and I feel I must be prepared." "In order to do so, I join every club I possibly can." "I know you're thinking that I'm just joining all these clubs... to give off the appearance that I'm involved, known to exist." "But Glee Club is different." "I really love Glee." "And I believe in what we stand for." "We've come from behind..." "dismissed and ridiculed by everyone." "And we've made something of ourselves..." "something that I'm proud to be a part of... something I want to be remembered for." "I miss my Cheerios uniform." "It made me feel safe, contained." "Even when I was feeling left out... at least I looked like I was a part of something." "I want my kids to be able to look back at these books and see who I was... make them proud." "Not the bastard one I'm carrying now, of course." "The ones I'll have when I'm married and ready." "I might not look like the head cheerleader anymore... but I'm still her on the inside." "Hmm." "I'm done playing the victim." "When that cheerleading picture is taken for the yearbook..." "I'm gonna be in it and back on the squad... whether Sue Sylvester likes it or not." "Hey, baby, which one of these ties goes better with my shirt?" " You're blocking the TV, Will." " Oh, come on." "I need your help." " School pictures are coming up." " Oh." "Well, in that case, um..." "Wear the red one for the teacher photo and the green one for the Glee Club." "It'll pop more when the cool kids deface it." "Yeah." "I, uh..." "I wanted to talk to you about that." "So Figgins stopped putting the Glee Club photo in the yearbook... because it always gets vandalized and..." "I just feel so bad for the kids." "I mean, they work so hard." "They deserve to be recognized." "Not being in that book gives the appearance that Glee Club isn't important." "I wanna buy an ad and use it as the Glee Club photo spread." "It's around $300." "Oh, great." "Why don't you take the food out of the refrigerator and just give that to the kids?" "Will, that food goes from my mouth right into our baby's belly." "We have a couple hundred bucks left over from selling the Blue Bomber II." " The answer's no, Will." "No." " But if we..." "No." "No." "No." "Actually, can you wait to cash that until Thursday?" "Kurt, I have a fantastic idea for a club... that would officially make me the most involved student in the whole school." "I want us to start a "Gay Lesb All."" " I'm sorry?" " The Gay Lesbian Alliance." ""Gay Lesb All."" "Hey, guys, great news." "Glee Club gets a photo in the Thunderclap." " Uh-huh." " Whoo!" "It's gonna show everyone at the school that Glee Club is on its way up." "When we win regionals, those Claps are going to be collector's items." "All of your classmates are going to be begging for your autographs." "But I had to compromise to do it." "Um, we only get a quarter page in back... which means we have to pick two team captains to appear in the photo." "So tomorrow we're gonna put it to a vote." " Exciting, huh?" "All right." " Yeah!" " Well, we're all here." "I guess we should vote." " With your permission..." "I have prepared a few words." " I nominate Rachel." " Second." "All right, let's vote up in this piece." "I got to go hit the gym and load up the "Guns of Puckerone" for the football picture." "Looks like everybody voted for Rachel." "Including Rachel." " But we need two captains, guys." " Why two?" "We're fine with having Rachel represent us in the Thunderclap by herself." "We'd actually prefer it." "The worst part is that after all this time, they're still embarrassed to be in Glee Club." "They still see themselves as losers." "I just need to get one of them to step up and become co captain." "Well, maybe you should let them use the captain they already elected." "You know, sometimes things sound a lot different coming from a peer... even if that peer is as annoying as Rachel." "None of this is gonna matter if they win at sectionals." "I'm really sorry I can't be there." "Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that." "I-I kind of think Ken scheduled your wedding the same day on purpose... you know, so... so you couldn't go." "Why would he do that?" "Come on." "We-We both know how he feels about our... relationship." "I'm marrying Ken, Will." "Look, I know that I've..." "I've definitely given him reason in the past to be jealous." "But I need you to know that I'm done with that now." "Ken has a lot of flaws." "He has 74 flaws as of yesterday." "But you know what?" "He's not vindictive." "He's actually a very good man." "He is kind, and he is great with the students here at McKinley." "We have that in common." "And yes, it's true his hygiene could be a lot better." "But he is absolutely full of compassion, and..." "Well, that is why I'm marrying him." "You're right." "I was out of line." "It won't happen again." " You wanted to see me, Mr. Schue?" " Oh, yeah, Rach." "Sit down." "So, how's the new captaincy going?" "I-I think that my unanimous election gave me a very strong mandate..." " to shake things up." " Great." "Well..." "I have a job for you, Captain." "We need a co captain." "But you have so many great ideas... no reason you shouldn't have some help pushing them through." "I could use a trusty lieutenant." "I do have over 65 proposals." "So... can I count on you?" "No problem." "I'm on it." "Um, I can't be co captain." "No time." "Kwanzaa." "Kwanzaa's late December, Mercedes." "The photo's this Thursday." "Yeah." "I'm prepping early this year." "¶¶ Well, you might think I'm crazy ¶¶" "I'd love to be in the photo, Rachel." "But you'd be standing and I'd be sitting." "It would throw off the whole composition." "I'll lean over." "But if you lean over... it'll look like you have stomach rolls." "¶¶ But I think that you're wild ¶¶¶¶" "On second thought, I don't think that you're leadership material, Artie." "Follower." "Brittany, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity." " No way." " Why not?" "I don't wanna be in a picture with you." "It'll get defaced." " No, it won't." " Yes, it will." "I'll be the one doing it." "I'm desperate." "Glee Club needs you, Finn." "I'm totally honored you asked me... but don't you think you should pick somebody who cares more?" "Not that I don't." "But I just have football and friends and stuff." "Glee Club only started working after you joined." "Face it, we wouldn't have all of the cheerleaders and football players in the club... if it wasn't for you." "You know I love Glee Club." "I just don't know why I have to represent it." "Because you're a leader, Finn." "And that's what leaders do." "They stick their necks out for people that they care about." "There are stakes here." "Morale is low." "You know it." "If things don't change, we're not even gonna place at sectionals... and then the club is over." " I can't do this alone." " You don't have to." "I am a leader." "It's who I am, who I wanna be." "You got yourself a co captain." "I'll do the picture with you." "I totally understand that as captain of the football team... you've worked really hard to project an appearance of steely toughness." "But Glee Club is different." "We have to present the appearance of positivity and optimism." "So... we're gonna practice... and I'm gonna teach you how to smile correctly for your photo." "¶¶ When you first left me I was wanting more ¶¶" "¶¶ You were kissing that girl next door ¶¶" " ¶¶ What you do that for ¶¶ - ¶¶ What you do that for ¶¶" " ¶¶ When you first left me ¶¶ - ¶¶ I didn't know what to say ¶¶" " ¶¶ I've never been on my own that way ¶¶ - ¶¶ Own that way ¶¶" " ¶¶ Just sat by myself all day ¶¶ - ¶¶ Myself all day ¶¶" "¶¶ I was so lost back then ¶¶" "¶¶ But with a little help from my friends ¶¶" "¶¶ I found the light in the tunnel at the end ¶¶" "¶¶ And now you're calling me up on the phone ¶¶" "¶¶ So you can have a little whine and a moan ¶¶" "¶¶ And it's only because you're feeling alone ¶¶" " ¶¶ At first when I see you cry ¶¶ - ¶¶ When I see you cry ¶¶" "¶¶ It makes me smile ¶¶" "¶¶ Yeah, it makes me smile ¶¶" "¶¶ At worst I feel bad for a while ¶¶" "¶¶ But then I just smile ¶¶" "¶¶ I go ahead and smile ¶¶" "¶¶ La-la-la, la-la-la La-la-la, la-la-la ¶¶" "¶¶ La-la-la, la-la-la La-la-la, la-la-la ¶¶" "¶¶ La-la-la, la-la-la La-la-la ¶¶" "¶¶ La-la-la, la-la-la ¶¶" "¶¶ At first when I see you cry ¶¶" "¶¶ See you cry ¶¶" " ¶¶ It makes me smile ¶¶ - ¶¶ Makes me smile ¶¶" " ¶¶ Yeah, it makes me smile ¶¶ - ¶¶ Yeah, it makes me smile ¶¶" " ¶¶ At worst I feel bad for a while ¶¶ - ¶¶ Feel bad for a while ¶¶" " ¶¶ But then I just smile ¶¶ - ¶¶ Smile ¶¶" " ¶¶ I go ahead and smile ¶¶ - ¶¶ Go ahead and smile ¶¶¶¶" "What the hell?" "Hey, man." "Shh." "We're practicing, dude." "Chill out." "We heard you were gonna be in the Glee Club photo..." " and we don't wanna mess up messing it up." " Screw you, Karofsky!" "I'm sick of you pulling people down!" "Hey, man, don't talk that kumbayeyah crap." "All right, you know this system's put in place to keep order around here." "Hey, you know what?" "Look, I'm gonna give you some options, okay?" "You want me to put the Hitler mustache on your Glee Club picture... or do you want the buck teeth on your Glee Club picture?" "Which one you want?" "Man, it don't matter to me either way." "I'll put both of..." "Hey, how do you spell "loser"?" "I'm gonna write it on his forehead." "His big ol' potato head." "You can write a whole haiku on that thing." "Can we shake a leg here?" "Fine." "I'm ready." "I'll..." "do it myself." "Wait." "I..." "I insist on only being shot from my left side." "Yeah, I kind of need to see your teeth." "It's sort of my job here." "I'm sorry." "I'm just..." "I'm upset." "My co captain bailed, and it just..." "I just need a minute." "Snap out of this." "Stop being defined by what other people think of you... or how they disappoint you." "It's lonely at the top." "You know that." "What's that song about overcoming professional and personal disappointments?" "Oh, yeah." "¶¶ When you're smiling ¶¶" "¶¶ When you're smiling ¶¶" "¶¶ The whole world smiles with you ¶¶¶¶" "I'm ready." "Great." "Wait, wait, wait." "That-That's it?" "I practiced over 18 different poses for this shoot... and I haven't even shown you any of my over-the-left-shoulder poses, see?" "Sorry, kid." "I got to blow." "I got a casting session in half an hour." "A..." "A casting session for what?" "My brother-in-law is shooting a commercial for his store." "I'm directing it." "I just do these school photos for the money." "Uh, wa-wa..." "Okay." "Wait." "No." "Don't." "I can take a couple more pictures for you." "I can cry on demand." "It's one of my many talents." "I'm very versatile." "And aside from nudity and the exploitation of animals..." "I'll pretty much do anything to break into the business." "W-Well, you certainly seem talented and all... but I-I need..." "There's other speaking parts in this thing." "I need, like, a bunch of other actors too." "I can help with that." "I'd like to call this meeting to order." "Hello, Finn." "How nice of you to show." "Look, I'm sorry." "The guys were harassing me in the locker room about it." "If I took the Glee Club photo, they'd make me choose between a Hitler mustache or buck teeth." "And I can't rock either of those looks." "Do you think I have a potato head?" "Look, I realize now that all of you think that Glee Club is just a joke." "Okay?" "And you're convinced that we can't win... and you're content to just sit idle by until Figgins cancels the club." "Well, I'm about to present to you a rare opportunity... the opportunity to become... stars." "How?" "We've all been cast in a local commercial." "Are you serious?" "Yes, Finn." "And while all of you have been so concerned with your appearance in this school..." "I've landed Glee Club its first big break." "Simply put, making us all celebrities." "Okay, and no one messes with celebrities or defaces their pictures." " What's the commercial?" " Hold on to your hats and get ready to sell... some mattresses." "Awesome." "I'm gonna get a nice pair of black suspenders." "My mom's gonna be really proud." "Let's do our camera face." "I can't believe we're finally breaking into the biz." "You guys, I want us to always remember this moment." "Soon there may be agents and managers and movie deals." "But right now I want us to remember what it feels like to be here together as a team." "Whatever." "As soon as I get my record deal, I'm not speaking to any of you." "Okay, guys, we're very excited to have you here." "We here at Mattress Land believe... that mattresses aren't just for sleeping and fornicating anymore." "We believe that buying an affordable mattress should be fun." "All right, let's go over the script." "I think it's pretty brilliant." "I wrote it myself." "Action." "Ah, me." " What's wrong?" " We just lost our jobs... at the factory." "And we can't get a good night's sleep." "Chipper up!" "Come on down to Mattress Land!" "We've got near wholesale prices to fit your style and pocketbook." "I'm-I'm sorry." "Mr. Casperberg... this script is brilliant." "But we're a glee club, and we should perform." "Perform the lines as I wrote them." "Wait a minute, Dennis." "What did you have in mind?" "¶¶ Ba, ba, ba, ba-ba ba-da, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" " Ahhhh!" " ¶¶ Ba, ba, ba, ba-ba, ba-da, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" " ¶¶ I get up ¶¶ - ¶¶ Ba, ba, ba, ba ¶¶" "¶¶ And nothing gets me down ¶¶" "¶¶ You got it tough ¶¶" "¶¶ I've seen the toughest around ¶¶" "¶¶ And I know ¶¶" "¶¶ Baby, just how you feel ¶¶" "¶¶ You've got to roll with the punches ¶¶" "¶¶ To get to what's real ¶¶" "¶¶ Oh, can't you see me standing here ¶¶" "¶¶ I got my back against the record machine ¶¶" "¶¶ I ain't the worst that you seen ¶¶" "¶¶ Ain't the worst that you seen ¶¶" "¶¶ Oh, can't you see what I mean ¶¶" "¶¶ Can't you see what I mean ¶¶" " ¶¶ Yeah, yeah, yeah ¶¶ - ¶¶ Might as well jump ¶¶" " ¶¶ Jump ¶¶" " Ba, ba, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" " ¶¶ Might as well jump ¶¶ - ¶¶ Ba, ba, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" " ¶¶ Go ahead and jump ¶¶ - ¶¶ Jump ¶¶" " ¶¶ Ba, ba, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶ - ¶¶ Go ahead and jump ¶¶" " ¶¶ Ba, ba-da, da, jump ¶¶ - ¶¶ Yeah ¶¶" " ¶¶ Ba ¶¶ - ¶¶ Ba ¶¶" " ¶¶ Ba ¶¶ - ¶¶ Ba, ba ¶¶" " ¶¶ Ba-da ¶¶ - ¶¶ Jump ¶¶" " ¶¶ Yeah ¶¶ - ¶¶ Might as well jump ¶¶" " ¶¶ Ba, ba, ba-da ¶¶ - ¶¶ Might as well jump ¶¶" "¶¶ Ba-da, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" " ¶¶ Go ahead and jump ¶¶ - ¶¶ Hey, hey, yeah ¶¶" "¶¶ Go ahead and jump ¶¶" "¶¶ Ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" "¶¶ Jump, jump, jump, jump ¶¶" " ¶¶ Yeah ¶¶ - ¶¶ Ba, ba, ba-da, da ¶¶" "¶¶ Jump ¶¶¶¶" "Come on down to Mattress Land!" "Come on down to Mattress Land!" "Terri, have you seen my pocket square?" "Terri?" " Terri." " A pocket square's gonna make you look like Ted Knight." "What is this?" "It's a pregnancy pad." "They have them at the maternity stores for trying on clothes... so you can see how you're gonna look when you're showing." "Kendra stole it for me so I can see if any of her old clothes would fit..." "Pick up your shirt." "What?" "No." " Pick up your shirt." " You're scaring me, Will." "Now, think about what you're accusing me of." "Think about it and turn around and go find your pocket square." "Please." "Why did you do this to us?" "I don't understand." "I thought you were leaving me." "You're so different, Will." "We both know it." "I can feel you." "You're pulling away from me." "Because I've started standing up to you, trying to make this a relationship of equals?" "No, because of the damn Glee Club." "Ever since you started it, you just walk around like you're better than me." "I should be allowed to feel good about myself." "Who are we kidding, Will?" "This marriage works because you don't feel good about yourself." "This marriage works because I love you..." " because I've always accepted you." " No." " Good and bad." " You love the girl you met when you were 15." " I'm not that girl." " You've made yourself a stranger to me now." " No." " Are you happy?" "Are you satisfied?" "It didn't start as a lie." "I really thought I was pregnant." "And then the doctor, he said it was a hysterical pregnancy... and I just panicked." "This is insane." "I mean, wh-what were you gonna do when the due date came?" "Quinn Fabray." "It was so perfect." "She didn't want hers, and I needed one." "I had the doctor use her ultrasound DVD... at your appointment that you came to." "I loved you, Terri." " I really loved you." " I'm so sorry, Will." "I'm so sorry." "Do you remember that appointment?" "Do you remember what we said?" "That at that moment, no matter what happened, we loved each other." "We can get that feeling back again." "You can love me back, Will." "Please, Will." "Please don't go." "Please don't go!" "Please!" "Oh, God." "Am I asking for too much..." "Ohio Board of Statewide Holiday Planning?" "All I want is just one day a year... where I'm not visually assaulted by uglies and fatties." "Seriously, Ohio, these retinas need a day off." "So here's the dream." "Friday after Christmas, which I have off... if you're hideous, stay at home." "Spend the entire day watching home videos... of a time when you weren't too repulsive for me to ever wanna look at." "At that's how Sue sees it." " Rod." " Slammin' , Sue." "We'll be right back." "Hey, Andrea, that "Sue's Corner"I just did..." "I was talking about you." "¶¶ Go ahead and jump ¶¶" "Who says finding a mattress can't be fun?" "At Mattress Land, we have mattresses of all shapes and sizes... at prices that won't break your pocketbook." "No credit?" "No problem." "Mattress Land has a no-hassle financing of 12.9%... with no money down and no payments till next year." "You'll jump for joy at our prices." "Come on down to Mattress Land!" "Coach Sylvester, we need to talk." "Oh, I got nothing to say to you, preggo." "The Cheerios photo's tomorrow, and I want back on that squad." "Oh, is that what you want?" "Well, what I wanted was a head cheerleader... who wasn't going to hoist her legs behind her ears... in the back seat of the first station wagon she could jimmy open... throwing away any chance she ever had in life." "It would be good for the school... show everyone that appearances don't matter." "Sometimes people have to deal with a little adversity." "I learned that in Glee Club." "Well, that little educational proverb... must have slithered from Will Schuester's mouth... right after his lesson on how to disqualify yourselves from sectionals." " What?" " Saw your little commercial last night." "Boy, did you Glee kids step in it." "Schue, I'm afraid Sue is right." "You have indeed stepped in it." " I didn't even know this was going on." " Of course you didn't, William." "You wouldn't know if your Glee Club was using your office... to breed rabbits for pets or for food." "You know why?" "You're too busy chasing tail... and loading your hair with enormous amounts of product." "Today it just looks like you put lard in it." "What are you even talking about?" "Look..." "Look, the kids did the commercial to foster a feeling of unity... after you... not anyone else..." "you got them banned from the yearbook." " That's what I did, yes." " It was an innocent mistake." "And what if I were to just innocently murder you, Will?" "I'd still have to go to trial." "Probably get off with justifiable homicide." "Let me review the rules for you." " This is crazy." " Amendment 63, seventh addendum." ""No professional activity of any kind will be tolerated..." ""and payment for services rendered negates amateur status..." " triggering immediate disqualification."" " Hey." "Hey." " Hey, hey, hey." "Keep it civil." "Keep it simple." " Hey what, mister?" "Keep it simple." "Hey, I am sorry, Schue, but I cannot let this slide." "But the kids weren't even paid." "There's a stack of mattresses in the choir room... piled as high as the empty hair gel bottles..." " in the Dumpster outside your apartment." " We'll give the mattresses back." "Schue, one of those mattresses was used." "You can't return a used mattress." "You can't even donate one to charity." "Lice." "Bedbugs." "I looked it up online." "Is there any reason that you have a soiled mattress in your office, Will?" "Have you and the redhead become so sexually depraved... that you have to commit your craven acts of adultery in between classes?" " Wha..." " I slept..." "You know, okay, fine." "I slept here, all right?" "Excuse me?" "I'm thinking about leaving my wife." "Oh, I didn't see that one coming at all." "William, I am very sorry about your personal troubles, but my hands are tied." "Sue's right." "You broke the rules." "I cannot fight the scholastic board." "I'm sorry, but Glee Club is over." "It's over." "Dear Journal..." "I've finally gotten Will Schuester and that Glee Club out of my hair." "This is a day that will live in infamy." "Once again, I've won." "Miss Sylvester." "It's like looking at a porno star in a nun's habit." "I wanted to show you that it still fits." "My baby bump isn't that bad." "It's just like I had a big lunch." "Take it off." "You need to get it through your pregnant head... there's no way you're getting in that photo or back on the Cheerios... end of story." " You're a hypocrite." " Excuse me?" "I just heard that you got Glee Club's amateur status revoked over a mattress... while you are constantly showering the Cheerios with swag." "I've gotten free shoes, complimentary tanning, haircuts." "The season tickets to Cedar Point?" "We sold those on eBay." "For a profit." "It seems to me that if Figgins found out... you would get banned from competition." "Fine." "You're back on the Cheerios." "I'll put you on full-time dry-cleaning duty... and shove you to the back of the photo to hide your shame." "I'm not finished." "Glee Club gets a full-page photo." " It's not up to me." " You are giving up... one of the Cheerios' six pages... and you are giving it to the Glee Club free of charge." "You know, Q. I'd forgotten... just how ruthless you really are." "You're like a young Sue Sylvester." "Now get out of my office... if you can manage to squeeze through the door without your water breaking... all over my new carpet." "You know what?" "I don't think I wanna be a Cheerio after all." "I don't wanna be on a team where I only appear to belong." "I'd rather be a part of a club that's proud to have me... like Glee Club." "It's my fault." "If I hadn't slept on that mattress... we could have just returned them and moved on." " Hey, can I give you some advice?" " Please." "You need to give yourself a break." "You do." "You'll..." "You'll figure out what to do with the kids." "You always do." "But I think right now you really need to focus on your own life." "You know, divorce is a really big deal." "Who said anything about getting a divorce?" "Oh, God, I'm so sorry." "I just assumed that that's..." "Is that what you would do?" "Well, um..." "When I first heard about what Terri had done..." "I thought there should be some sort of law." "But then when I thought about it some more..." "I thought about what I would have done... if I'd felt you slipping away." "You would never be that cruel." "You know, her methods were wrong." "But, um..." "I totally understand her intentions." "You're a lot to lose, Will." "But we don't wanna go to sectionals without you." "It's without me or not at all." "Look, I was the one who slept on the mattress... which means I accepted them, not you." "Which means I'm disqualified from competition." " Not you guys." " He's taking the bullet for us." "Solid." "We have worked too hard for you guys not to get your shot." "We can't do this without you, Mr. Schue." " Hell, we probably can't do it with you." " That's not true." "You guys are good." "You're really good." "Y-Y-You did "Jump" for that commercial without me, right?" "Look... the best teachers don't give you the answers." "They just point the way and let you make your own choices... your own mistakes." "That way, you get all the glory." "And you deserve it." "But if... if you can't win without me there... then I haven't done my job." "We're really sorry, Mr. Schue." "I know." "I want you guys to go get gussied up... and take that Glee Club photo with pride." "I wanna see a smile on every one of your faces." "¶¶ Smile ¶¶" "¶¶ Though your heart is aching ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile even though it's breaking ¶¶" "¶¶ When there are clouds ¶¶" "¶¶ In the sky ¶¶" "¶¶ You'll get by ¶¶" "¶¶ If you smile through your pain and sorrow ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile and maybe tomorrow ¶¶" "¶¶ You'll see the sun come shining through ¶¶" "¶¶ For you ¶¶" "¶¶ Light up your face with gladness ¶¶" "¶¶ Hide every trace of sadness ¶¶" "¶¶ Although a tear ¶¶" "¶¶ May be ever so near ¶¶" "¶¶ That's the time ¶¶" "¶¶ You must keep on trying ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile What's the use of crying ¶¶" "¶¶ You'll find that life is still worthwhile ¶¶" "¶¶ If you just smile ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile though your heart is aching ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile even though it's breaking ¶¶" "¶¶ When there are clouds in the sky ¶¶" "¶¶ You'll get by ¶¶" "¶¶ That's the time ¶¶" " ¶¶ You must keep on trying ¶¶ - ¶¶ On trying ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile What's the use of crying ¶¶" "¶¶ You'll find that life is still worthwhile ¶¶" "¶¶ If you just smile ¶¶" "¶¶ You'll find that life is still worthwhile ¶¶" "¶¶ If you just ¶¶" "¶¶ Smile ¶¶"