"It starts on a bridge." "Craig !" "What were you planning to do about your bike, hon?" "I don't care about my bike." "I'm killing myself." "But we spent a lot of money on the bike, sport." "We only ask that you take care of it." "Think of me, Craig." "I might want that bike when I grow up." "I'm sorry." "I just didn't think it..." "That's right." "You just didn't think about us when you were deciding to do this, did you, honey?" "Pretty selfish, I'd say." "Have you thought about how this might affect your sister?" "I'm..." "I 'msorry,I..." "This is the moment where I usually wake up in a sweaty panic." "But for some reason, this time was different." "I..." "I want to kill myself." "Fill this out." "So..." "How you doing?" "You got a cigarette?" "Uh..." "No,sorry." "What's wrong with you?" "I just don't smoke." "No, I mean, why are you in an ER, at 5:00 on a Sunday morning?" "Well..." "I guess, there's just been a lot going on in my mind lately." "Go ahead." "Okay, well, this is sort of difficult to explain." "But..." "See there's this girl..." "Yeah, got you." "And this summer school application that I'm really nervous about." "Summer school?" "Yeah, it's like this super prestigious, kind of..." "Why would you want to be in school in the summer?" "You should be on Coney Island, bird-dogging chicks." "Are you a doctor?" "What do you think?" "You..." "Youdon'treally seem like a doctor." "You ever heard of Doogie Howser?" "Well, I hope they fix whatever's wrong with you." "Thank you." "Yeah." "So, how long have you been feeling suicidal?" "I don't know." "I've been depressed for about a year." "Mmm-hmm." "And I've thought about it before, but never like this." "You know, never so real." "Did anything happen today specifically to trigger these feelings?" "Sometimes I wish I had an easy answer for why I'm depressed." "That my father beat me." "Or I was sexually abused." "But my problems are less dramatic than that." "Like, my dad always asks the wrong questions." "So, Craig, how's the intro to Wall Street class?" "So maybe this is a slight exaggeration, but I do have a problem with stress vomiting." "And my friends sometimes look at me like I'm from another planet." "And I'm obsessed with this girl." "Who happens to be going out with my best friend." "So, is there any one thing that made me want to jump off a bridge?" "Um..." "No." "Nothing unusual." "Hmm." "You on any medications?" "Zoloft." "But I stopped." "Yeah, did your doctor take you off the meds?" "No, I just stopped on my own." "Oh, you shouldn't do that." "Well, Craig, it doesn't seem like you're a danger to yourself." "So, what I'm gonna suggest is that we contact your parents, let them know what's going on, and then we refer you to one of our outpatient services." "Okay?" "But..." "I need help now." "I know you're upset." "But, Craig, the people that we admit into this facility, are very, very sick." "I am, too." "Well, can't you just, like, give me something?" "Not without your parents' consent." "Look, this is serious business." "Maybe I'm not explaining right how serious this is." "It feels like everything is just building up, and everyone else, they just seem to handle everything." "You know, like..." "But not me, you know." "I'm scared, okay?" "And I can't go back out there." "I don't know what..." "I might do something." "So, I just need some help." "Please. I just need you to help me." "Welcome to 3 North, Craig." "Um..." "Whatexactly is 3 North?" "Our adult psychiatric floor." "Oh, but, I'm only 16." "Our teen floor is undergoing some renovations, so all teens are here with the adults." "And while you're with us, you'll be expected to act like one." "So, starting tomorrow, you'll follow the schedule and participate in the group activities." "In the meantime, we'll contact your family, and they can bring over a change of clothes, toothbrush, that kind of thing." "Well, I don't think I'll be here that long." "I have school tomorrow, so..." "You'll have to discuss that with Dr. Minerva." "Now, do you have any sharp objects on you?" "Pocket knife?" "Keys?" "And your belt and shoe laces." "My shoe laces?" "We can't take any chances." "Hey, Dr. Minerva." "Hey, Smitty." "This is our new patient, Craig Gilner." "Hi, Craig." "How are you?" "Um..." "Just,like,you know." "Well, why don't you get settled in, and we'll talk later, okay?" "Nice to meet you, Craig." "It'll come to you." "Good morning, Jimmy." "What was that about?" "Jimmy?" "He's a schizophrenic." "is there a place here for people more like me?" "We got all kinds of patients here, man." "All kinds..." "Hey, hey, Bobby!" "My man." "How about a tour for our new friend, Craig, here?" "What do you say?" " Sure thing, babe." " Thanks, man." "So, Bobby's gonna show you around, while we fix up your room, okay?" "Okay." "Yeah?" "All right." "See you guys in a jiff." "So, is this like a mental ward?" "Not a ward, it's a hospital." "Well, this is where we hang out." "There's a record player and such." "All the records are scratched." "Some folks like to hang out and play table tennis." "Did they tell you about the points system?" "Points for ping-pong?" "I think the name ping-pong trivializes the sport." "But, I mean, like, points for privileges, to hang out in the rec room, visit the gift shop, stuff like that." "You can join them if you like." "Uh, no, I'm cool." "Cool Craig. I like that." "This is the shower." "It doesn't have a lock." "So when you go in, put it on "in-use," get it?" "I got it." "Okay, you got it, but nobody else does." "So they'll walk in on you when you're scrubbing your balls." "And you don't want that." "There's one in the other hall, too, but I wouldn't use it." "It bothers Solomon." "Who's Solomon?" "Hey, Bobby!" "Hey, Cap." "Right here, this is where you call people." "Assuming you have people." "Or they can call you." "You know, telephone." "And this is the TV room." "People hang out and watch TV in that room." "That's why they call it that." "Um..." "Whowasthat?" "That's Noelle." "She's one of the teens." "Did they tell you about the renovations?" "Yeah." "How old are you?" "Sixteen." "Sixteen !" "You look stressed out for 16." "You need to relax." "Get a girlfriend, or something, you know." "I'm working on it." "Mmm-hmm." "So what is it you do here, exactly?" "Same thing as you." "You're a patient?" "What were you doing in the emergency room this morning?" "ER has the best coffee, son." "They just let you out?" "No." "What are you in here for?" "Let's go see if Smitty's got your room ready." "Hey, Muqtada, got a new roommate, man." "Hey." "Don't take it personal, man." "He doesn't really talk much." "And I've actually never seen him leave the room." "Okay, guys, lunch in five." "What do they have for lunch?" "I'm sorry?" "Please, turn out light." "Dr. Minerva." "I'm feeling much better now." "I was feeling bad this morning, but I'm okay now." "So, you know, I'd like to go home, if that's cool." "It says here you're suicidal and asked to be admitted." "Yeah, I thought you guys could do something quick." "You know, like give me some medication to make me feel better." "Or..." "Look, I didn't think that I'd be committed." "I really don't think I belong here." "A lot of patients feel that way at first." "Just give it a little time." "How little?" "Five days." "Five days?" "No more than 30." "We'll have an evaluation to see if you're ready to leave on Thursday." "I can't be here until Thursday because I'll miss school, and my friends might find out where l am." "It's nothing to be ashamed of, Craig." "Depression is a medical illness." "If you were diabetic, would you be embarrassed by that?" "Well, can I at least talk to my mom about this before..." "Of course, Craig." "I just spoke to her, she's very anxious to see you." "Craig !" "Don't blame my parents for how messed up I am." "Okay, so my dad works too much." "And my mom's a little too fragile." "And my sister's some kind of child genius." "But it's not like I was never hugged as a child or anything." "In fact, they've been pretty supportive through all this." "I knew you were having a hard time, but I had no idea." "That you were..." "That it was..." "Well, you're so brave, honey." "I'm so proud of you." "Really?" "Um..." "'Cause I was actually having second thoughts." "Oh, no, hon. I think the doctors said they need you to stay here for a couple of days for observation." "I think that's a real good idea." "But I don't think you really understand, okay?" "Some of the people in here are really messed up." "I don't think my roommate's left the room in weeks." "I think we better leave it up to the doctor's discretion, you know." "We've tried and..." "They're professionals, they can help you in ways that we can't." "And I think it's..." "I think it looks like a real nice place." "Right, George?" "Take your hands out of my pockets!" "Yeah." "When can I join?" "Me, too." "Can I stay, too?" "Oh, no, honey." "But we'll come and visit." "They took my cell phone, so some people might try to call the house." "Just please do not tell them that I'm in here." "Here are some clothes, and toiletries and stuff." "And will you eat something, please?" " lan Curtis." " Who?" "Dude from Joy Division." "Hung himself." "Kurt Cobain." "Freud." "Ernest Hemingway." "Salvador Allende." "Jesus Christ, girl." "Can you pick somebody we've heard of for once?" "Chilean president." "Shot himself rather than surrender to a fascist military coup." "Mmm-mmm." "I don't think that counts." "Of course, it counts." "If he was going to die anyway, it doesn't count." "Hey, Craig !" "Come sit with the men." "Craig, this is my pal, Johnny, and this clown right here, this is Humble." "You got a girlfriend?" "He's working on it." "They got some cute ones your age." "I had a lot of women in my day, kid." "Yeah?" "You don't have to act so surprised." "Back in the day, I was Sir Lick-a-Lot." "Ask Bobby." "But you want to know the secret to keeping any woman under your spell?" "I love you." "That's it?" "That's it." "But it don't hurt if you can play guitar." "Don't mess with the kid's mind, he's already screwed up enough as it is." "Why are you so screwed, kid?" "Mind your own business, Humble." "That's cool." "But you should know, Craig, if you don't open up, you're never going to heal." "Hey, what's the pot up to now?" "Eleven." "Eleven?" "Yesterday, it was 12." "Humble ate a buck." "Humble ate a buck?" "The professor bet him a dollar, he wouldn't eat it." "He won." "What is the world coming to?" "Bunch of nut jobs in here, I'll tell you that." "What's the money for?" "Pizza party." "So we don't have to eat this crap." "They say we can have one, but we gotta pay for it ourselves." "Well, I have eight dollars." "Well, you don't have to go bragging about it, Craig." "People in here have nothing." "Show a little humility, please." "No. I didn't mean..." "It's..." "It's okay." "You're young, you'll learn." "Craig." "You get two points for eating, man." "I bet Smitty's got 15 bucks on him." "And he's got a 20 spot. I saw it." "Let's go jump him in the parking lot." "It's under the hat." "It's under the hat?" "Sorry." "Check." "So, Craig, how are you adjusting to 3 North?" "Uh..." "Okay,Iguess." "Dr. Mahmoud wrote that you were taking Zoloft, but went off it three weeks ago." "is that right?" "Yeah." "Do you see a therapist?" "Dr. Yanof was the one who prescribed me the Zoloft." "I see her every, you know, month or so." "Why did you stop taking it?" "I guess I thought I was better." "Like I didn't need it." "Maybe that's because it was working." "Can you describe to me how you were feeling before coming here this morning?" "I guess, depressed." "Anxious, stressed." "Have you been feeling more stress than usual lately?" "Any reason in particular?" "Yeah." "There's this Franklin Gates Summer Semester thing that my dad..." "Well, that I really want to get into." "But the application is due in a week and I haven't even looked at it." "Why not?" "Every time I think about it, my brain starts this cycling thing about not getting in." "What would happen if you didn't get in?" "Then I wouldn't be able to put it on my college applications." "Which means I wouldn't get into a good college." "But not even Adam Smith could have foreseen the inequities of modern capitalism." "If I didn't get into a good college, I wouldn't have a good job." "Diffusing the situation in Iran through unilateral diplomacy is my top priority as Commander in Chief." "Which means I wouldn't be able to afford a good lifestyle." "Hey, MTV. lt's your boy, Craig Gilner." "Welcome to my crib." "So I wouldn't be able to find a girlfriend." "Which means I'd probably get depressed." "And I'd end up like Muqtada in a place like this for the rest of my Iife." "So, what would happen if I didn't get in?" "I don't know." "It's hard to explain." "Do you have anyone you can explain it to?" "Friends?" "Family?" "I have friends and family, but it's not always easy." "It's important to have a support system." "People you can really talk to." "Have you been having any other symptoms?" "I have trouble eating." "I can't keep it down." "All right." "You'll start group activities tomorrow, we'll check in again on Tuesday." "You have any questions?" "Yes." "Um..." "If I'm feeling better, do you think I can get out of here by tomorrow?" "Because I have school and this application and..." "Five days, Craig." "Minimum." "I know this seems like a strange place at first, but try to make the most of it." "It's Monday." "I shouldn't be waking up next to some depressive middIe-aged Egyptian dude." "I shouldn't be showering on a co-ed floor in a stall without a lock." "I shouldn't be lining up for meds behind schizophrenics and sociopaths." "It's Monday, I should be in school." "But I guess that's what got me here in the first place." "When my parents Went to school, they just went to the one closest to their house." "Makes sense, right?" "A Iot of places are still like this." "Cleveland, probably Denver." "But not New York." "You've got schools for science geeks like..." "Bronx High School of Science." "Schools for thespians." "The LaGuardia School for the Performing Arts." "Schools for do-gooders." "EI Puente Academy for Peace and Justice." "But the most competitive of all" "NeW York City public schools is this one." "Executive Pre-Professional." "My school." "This billionaire philanthropist named Gerard Lutz set it up in conjunction with the public school system." "So it's not some private school for elite Upper-East-Siders." "You can be on welfare and food stamps, or your parents can own an island in the South Pacific." "It doesn't matter." "You'll be accepted as long as you're one of the 800 smartest and most accomplished students in the five boroughs." "Like these kids here." "There must have been a serious clerical error, because somehow... I got in." "Me, too." "Me, too." "You, too?" "You, too?" "That's my best friend, Aaron, getting fIirt-punched by Nia for the first time." "There were many more of those." "followed by hand-hoIding, kissing and eventually, sex." "I don't like to picture that one." "What I would give to be fIirt-punched by Nia just once." "And so it began..." "Look at those mahatmas." "I always wanted a Harley with hot, tight mahatmas." "You can have the mahatmas, I just want the beaver." "Hey, Bobby, check out this bike." "Yeah, I don't get wrapped in a bunch of stuff I can't have." "Relax, it's just for fun, bro." "That's not fun." "That's propaganda, man." "All those Madison Avenue types." "Telling you how to live your life." "Fast cars, hot chicks," "Reese's Pieces, Gucci." "Werther's Original." "I don't buy into that bullshit." "Are you gonna eat your burrito, Craig?" "No, I'm not hungry." "You can have it." "Hello, Mr. Breakfast Burrito." "Humble, put that back." "He said I could have it." "Yeah, it's really fine." "Craig's gotta eat, too." "Put it back." "Take a hike, Bob." "He's not hungry." "Thanks, Bobby, but I'm really not hungry." "Fine, what do I care if you eat?" "I understand there was an incident this morning." "Would anyone care to talk about it?" "Something involving a breakfast burrito." "Johnny?" "It was between Bobby and Humble." "Ask them." "I was interested in hearing it from an impartial observer." "Well, if you want my opinion, I think Bobby has been on edge because of his interview, and he's lashing out because he's nervous." "Interesting observation, Johnny." "My hemorrhoids are flaring up too, Johnny." "Want to tell the group about that?" "Hemorrhoids!" "It'll come to ya!" "Bobby, it's okay if you want to keep your feelings private, but you should know that there's nothing wrong with being nervous about your interview tomorrow." "I'm not nervous about my interview." "Then what is it, Bob?" "Maybe he's hungry." "He doesn't look hungry." "He looks tired." "Did you sleep last night?" "He didn't eat today." "Yes, he did." "Did you see him eat?" "I'm pretty sure he ate." "I didn't see him eat." "I get anxious when I'm tired." "Okay, listen." "I'm not hungry and I'm not tired." "It's just the sweater." "It's all I have for my interview tomorrow." "I told you it was the interview." "It's a nice sweater, Bob." "No, it's not." "It smells like a hobo's Band-Aid." "But it looks good on you." "About as good as your hair looks on you." "Bobby, no insults, please." "I can loan you a shirt." "What was that, Craig?" "I'll just call my mom and have her bring one of my dad's shirts over." "It's not a problem." "I live like two blocks away." "No, thanks." "Bobby!" "Take the shirt." "Yeah, he's trying to help, Bob." "It's a very nice offer, Craig." "Bobby, why are you reluctant to accept it?" "'Cause I don't want any handouts." "It wouldn't exactly be a handout." "He'd just be loaning it to you." "Okay, I'll take it." "As long as you'll get off my back." "Do you want the shirt, Bobby?" "I would..." "I would like the shirt." "Craig?" "is it okay if it has yellow armpit stains?" "Sorry, it was a dumb joke." "When are you going to let me get to see her again?" "When are you going to let me get to see her again?" "Because I'm her father." "You don't think that I have..." "What's that?" "I do have..." "I will have a place." "I have a..." "I'm gonna have a place on Thursday. lt's true." "Listen, I never asked you for anything." "Could you just, for once, maybe do what I say." "Hello?" "Hello!" "You have two new messages." "Hey, Craig. lt's me." "Okay." "So, she's probably not in the bathtub right now, but this is how I sometimes like to picture Nia." "It's sick, I know." "You were acting a little weird earlier, so I just wanted to make sure everything's okay." "All right, that's it." "I'm with Aaron." "He's being such a tool." "Bye!" "Hello, Mr. Gilner, this is your science teacher, Mr. Reynolds." "We really need to talk about your missing lab assignments." "Five of them." "Hello?" "Hey, Nia." "What's up?" "Hey!" "Just finishing my Gates Summer app." "I'll freak if I don't get in." "What's up with you?" "Um." "Just feeling kind of, you know..." "Yeah, I noticed." "is that why you weren't in school today?" "Yeah, I was feeling pretty shitty, so I just stayed home." "Yeah." "I get like that sometimes, too." "Depressed or whatever." "Do you take anything for it?" "Um..." "Look, I never told anybody this." "Not even Aaron, but, if it makes you feel any better," "I see a therapist." "Really?" "For, like, over a year now." "I had no idea." "Yeah, it's pretty embarrassing." "I take Zoloft." "Shut up!" "I do." "Oh, my God !" "We're like so screwed up." "Yeah, we're like partners in mental illness." "The illest." "I'm Solomon." "I would ask you to please keep it down." "I'm trying to rest." "Craig, Who is that?" "Um..." "Excuse me." "Is everything okay?" "Will you be much longer?" "One second, please." "Are you Iike in a crack den or something?" "Yeah, no, it's fine." "Everything's..." "It'll come to you." "It will always come to you." "Where are you?" "I gotta go, Nia." "Bye." "Craig... lt's all yours." "Thanks, Mom." "You know, your dad really wanted to be here today, he just had a client crisis." "Client crisis?" "Yeah, but he said, he's for sure coming tomorrow." "Have you made any friends yet?" "Yeah, I guess." "Are you friends with the tranny?" "Oh, the tranny." "Not really." "Did you talk to my school?" "Because I really can't have them finding I'm in a place like this." "It could really damage my future." "No, no. I just said you were in the hospital." "I didn't say anything specific." "Good." "The last thing I need is for them to find out I've been institutionalized." "Transvestite!" "Schizo!" "What's going on, babe?" "Uh..." "Sorry. I was just dropping the shirt off." "She's cute, isn't she?" "Yeah. ls she yours?" "Veronica." "Like the Elvis Costello song." "How old is she?" "Eight and three-quarters." "That's what she says." "Three quarters." "Well, good luck with your interview." "What's it for, if you don't mind me asking?" "A group home." "Basically, I need a place to live when they kick me out of here on Thursday." "Let me know if you need somebody to practice with or something." "What do you mean?" "Like a practice interview." "So you're better prepared." "Yeah?" "Yeah." "You want to try?" "You want to try now?" "If you're not doing anything." "Okay, great." "Uh..." "Holdon ." "Let me do this with the official shirt on." "Okay." "You're ready?" "Hold on one second." "I don't know if I'll do it like..." "Which is better, like..." "This?" "Yeah." "That looks natural." "Okay." "You can relax." "I'm nervous." "Okay, why is it that you think you qualify to live in this group home?" "Because if you don't accept me, I'll be homeless." "Okay, good." "Yeah, I think you're ready." "Really?" "I didn't sound too desperate?" "No." "But, uh..." "You might want to focus on the positive things that you get from this experience as opposed to, you know..." "The negative." "Exactly." "Like what is it that you could bring to the home?" "Something special that only you could offer." "It could be anything." "Maybe you have a great attitude?" "No." "You always clean up after yourself?" "Not really." "You know, I think in these situations it's okay to bend the truth just a little bit." "Yeah. I just don't want to get people's expectations up and then disappoint them later." "That's it." "You're pragmatic." "That's what you tell them." "Okay, yeah." "Right?" "Yeah, I know you're gonna do great." "Thanks." "You want to play some table tennis?" "I'm pretty terrible at table tennis." "It's all right." "It's just for fun." "Come on." "We play a lot around here." "The problem is, most people are too zonked out on their meds to compete." "One, zip." "She's a liar." "She's a liar." "Please, baby." "Baby." "Please listen." "Listen." "I love you." "Don't worry about it." "Of course, I forgive you, baby." "Johnny doesn't phone kiss." "You came." "Yeah. I mean, I had other plans, but I canceled them." "Good. I thought I might have scared you off yesterday." "Oh, yeah, celebrity suicide." "It's kind of weird." "Okay, so check it out." "We're gonna play a different game today." "Okay." "I ask you a question and you ask me a question." "Do we answer them?" "It's up to you, but no matter what, you have to finish with a question." "Here we go." "You ready?" "Yeah." "I said finish with a question." "Are you stupid?" "Uh, no..." "Areyou?" "There you go." "Do you think I'm gross looking?" "No." "You look awesome." "What's your question?" "Why'd you invite me here?" "I thought it was nice that you loaned Bobby your shirt." "Don't you think this is a good way to get to know someone?" "Sure." "Have you played this before?" "Not in here." "Are you a virgin?" "So..." "How long have you been here?" "Nice transition, Craig." "Twenty-one days." "Who dragged you here?" "I checked myself in, I guess." "Kind of, by accident." "The suicide hotline said to come." "Why are you here so long?" "They think I might cut myself again." "Why'd you call the suicide hotline?" "I guess..." "Maybe I didn't really want to kill myself." "But I kind of did." "Does that make sense?" "So, where do you go?" "Executive Pre-Professional." "You?" "Delfin." "You're not some sort of school uniform perv, are you?" "You guys wear uniforms?" "I knew it." "Okay, sorry, I'm gonna invade your personal space for one second." "Why?" "What are you doing?" "I'm just..." "Ow, you shocked me." "Make a wish." "What do we do now?" "Are you still playing?" "No." "Are you?" "I'll race you to arts and crafts." "Hey, guys." "No running, please." "Well, well, well !" "Still working on it, Cool Craig?" "It's not what you think." "I think the two of you were playing the question game outside." "That's what I think." "Well, I guess it is what you think then." "I thought so." "This is free period arts recreational therapy for you latecomers." "I'm Joanie, recreation director." "I'm Craig." "Well, materials are on the table, Craig." "So just go for it." "That's okay." "I don't really draw." "Sure you do." "It doesn't have to be representative, it can be abstract, whatever you want." "Well, I'll just hang out, if that's okay." "Everybody?" "Our new guest, Craig, is having what we call an artistic block." "He doesn't know what to draw." "How about beavers?" "Humble, we do not draw the sort of beavers you're talking about." "Oh, really?" "That's actually nice." "I thought it was gonna be a vagina." "That's nice." "Rolling pin !" "What was that, Roger?" "Did you say something?" "This is weird." "Look, she's not gonna get off your back until you draw something." "Can be anything." "I bet you got some crazy stuff in that messed up little mind of yours." "America has created the longest peace time economic expansion in our history." "Shit!" "With nearly 18 million new jobs, wages rising at more than twice the rate of inflation." "The highest home ownership in history." "Craig, honey, what's the matter?" "I can't do it." "Five years old and I'm already a failure." "What can't you do?" "I can't even trace Manhattan on tracing paper." "Tracing paper!" "Are you kidding me?" "Craig, you can't trace freehand and expect it to be perfect." "Why not?" "Because, honey, you're five years old." "That's no excuse." "Mozart composed three major symphonies by the time he was five." "Actually, Craig, it was four." "I have an idea." "Instead of trying to trace maps of Manhattan, why don't you just make up your own maps?" "Of imaginary places." "Oh, looks like somebody got unblocked." "That is extraordinary." " What is it?" " lt's so pretty." "Looks like a brain or something, right?" "Yeah, it's a brain map." "It's a great brain map." "It's beautiful." "A smart talent." "I didn't get the brain part." "Looks like a city." "Hey, Craig, you got a phone call, man." "Hello?" "is this the loony bin?" "Okay, I've been putting this off, but I guess you should know more about my best friend, Aaron." "He's the kind of guy that life just comes easy to." "He's got a 4.6 GPA." "I don't even see how that's possible." "And he'll probably get into the Gates Summer Program, and claim something like... I didn't even apply to that thing." "They totally recruited me." "Whatever, it'll look good on my college apps." "Not that he'd need it." "His extra-curriculars are out of control." "I mean, Aaron does everything." "He plays sports." "He started a film society." "He invented that adapter thing that converts vinyl albums into MP3s." "I just couldn't compete." "How'd you get this number?" "My girl gave it to me." "How'd you end up in adult psych?" "Do they serve beer in there?" "Dude, can you get me any Vicodin?" "Come on, guys." "Leave him alone." "Seriously, Craig, what happened?" "I don't know." "I had a bad night." "What do you mean, a bad night?" "I'm just feeling..." "Dude, you just need to chill more, okay?" "Your problem is, you never chill." "I'm gonna be chilling tonight, where you gonna be?" "Here. I'm gonna be here." "Oh, my God, Craig !" "There is so nothing wrong with you." "Yes, there is." "I'm depressed." "I take pills for it." "Ask Nia." "Ask Nia what?" "Craig!" "Forget it." "Maybe if you weren't such a dick, people would talk to you more and you would know this kind of stuff." "Dude, is this some kind of pity play for my girlfriend?" "Aaron..." "What?" "Fuck you." "I know, keep it down." "I'm sorry." "I don't have any friends." "This is very tough thing to learn." "Huh." "Seems here someone neglected to turn in their Gates Summer application." "Who is it that doesn't want to study at Franklin Gates this summer?" "Or eventually get into a good college?" "Get a good job." "Have a good lifestyle." "Get laid." "I don't understand why anyone would want to end up depressed, alone and homeless in a psych ward." "Sleeping next to some asocial reject named Muqtada." "How many times are you gonna wind up in here again, huh?" "What is the matter with you?" "How can you let your child see you like this, huh?" "What kind of father are you?" "I honestly think it'd be better off for her, for all of us, if you were just dead." "But you can't even get that right." "Excuse me, miss, you're going to have to leave." "Come on." "You okay, Bobby?" "My accountant." "Check the wrong box and the woman goes nuts." "And so, who was there buying soy milk?" "Alec Baldwin, which I thought was kind of cool." "And I talked to the admissions guy at Gates." "He agreed to give you an extension." "But, you just focus on getting well, honey." "Don't stress about that." "Okay?" "Uh, yeah, you shouldn't stress about it." "That doesn't mean it's not important to try for it." "George..." "Don't you have a client in crisis somewhere, Dad?" "It'll come to you !" "Hey, Bobby." "How was your interview?" "I blew it." "What happened?" "Calm down !" "Calm down !" "Okay, man." "Easy, easy." "Easy does it." "Here we go." "Okay. lt's all right." "And was that difficult for you?" "Seeing Bobby like that?" "I was scared." "Not that he was gonna hurt me or anything." "Just, you know, seeing someone lose it like that." "You know, it reminded me of how I feel sometimes." "How's that?" "Like I'm on the verge of just blowing up." "All the stress and pressure and anxiety just bubbling up." "But I'm never able to let it out like that." "You know, I just keep it inside." "Have you always felt that way?" "Well, not when I was a kid." "Tell me about it." "What do you mean?" "About a time you remember being happy." "Carefree." "Uh..." "There was this one day back in eighth grade." "It wasn't that long ago, but time felt different back then." "Like there was more of it." "We spent the morning at Coney Island." "Afterwards, we rode our bikes through Bay Ridge," "Sunset Park," "Park Slope," "Downtown brooklyn," "brooklyn Heights, all the way to the brooklyn Bridge." "Then everything changed." "Girls, grades, parents, two wars, impending environmental catastrophe, a messed up economy..." "All these things seemed to come out of nowhere, like on the same day." "Craig, there is a saying that goes something like," ""Lord, grant me the strength to change the things I can," ""the courage to accept the things I can't," ""and the wisdom to know the difference."" "So..." "So, let's talk about your parents." "You think I can change my parents?" "No, but I'm a psychiatrist." "So I have to ask you about them at some point." "Um..." "They're good people." "But, okay, take my dad." "I just saw him today." "And he knows I'm in here 'cause I'm stressed out, but he still brings up the Gates application." "It's, like, "Get a clue, Dad." ""There's something bigger going on here."" "And what's that?" "I don't know." "But it feels big." "Thanks." "No problem." "is everything okay?" "Yeah, just screwing the pooch with my interview." "It's okay." "Oh, I'm sorry." "I'm over it." "Really?" "Not really, I'm just zonked on Ativan." "Where'd you get the ice cream?" "Mister Softee, across the street." "Bobby, man !" "I want ice cream." "Can I have a lick, Bob?" "Got to do two points off, Bob." "It's worth it." "What's with these points?" "Yeah, what is with these points?" "I mean, seriously, no one could possibly be keeping track of all of them." "That's three points off for doubting the system." "Ah, screw the system." "You can have some of my points." "Johnny needs a lick." "It looks good." "What's this?" "Dollar." "For the pizza party." "Where'd you get this?" "Don't worry about it." "Yeah, it's a true story." "He was one of the Black Panthers." "And you never heard from him again?" "Mmm-mmm." "Don't touch me." "Don't touch me." "Don't touch me." "Don't touch me." "See that lady right there?" "She was a radical academic up at Columbia, and then they passed the Patriot Act." "You know what the Patriot Act is?" "Yeah." "Okay." "When they passed the Patriot Act, then she went bonkers." "She thought that Bush put bugs in all the phones." "Pretty crazy, right?" "And that guy, Solomon, over there?" "He's nuts, too." "He's part of this Hasidic acid-head scene in Williamsburg." "He did 100 tabs of acid." "Don't look, don't look." "In one night." "And hasn't been the same since." "Yeah." "Wow!" "Yeah." "Crazy, right?" "Kinda cool." "Some cool people in here." "Yeah, uh..." "What about you?" "What about me?" "I just..." "You know, um, your daughter, Veronica." "When are you gonna see her again?" "You know, I think my daughter is just better off without me." "Come on." "No, really." "I mean, I'm not really a role model in this place, and I think she's just..." "She's better off." "Look, I know that it's none of my business, and you can tell me to get lost whenever you want," "but I think that she's just gonna want her dad around, and I don't think she's gonna care about..." "You should get lost." "Okay." "I think the Ativan's wearing off, I'm sorry." "It's fine." "Sorry." "Do you have any other puke stories that you'd like to share with me, while we're getting to know each other?" "I have a few actually." "Want to try?" "No, it's okay." "Welcome back to musical exploration." "Um, who doesn't have an instrument?" "No worries, bro." "Let's get you right up here on vocals." "Uh, no, I can't sing." "Like he can't draw." "Seriously, I..." "No, I'm just..." "Cool Craig, what are you afraid of?" "Come on." "Craig, get up there." "Craig." "Craig, Craig, Craig." "You know this one?" "I think I've heard it before." "All right." "Bobby and the ladies will help you out." "The ladies?" "Okay, people, just like we practiced last week." "You guys ready?" "Here we go." "Pressure pushing down on me" "Pressing down on you no man ask for" "Under pressure" "That burns a building down" "Splits a family in two" "Puts people on streets" "That's okay" "It's the terror of knowing what this world is about" "Watching some good friends screaming" "Let me out!" "Pray tomorrow gets me higher" "Pressure on people, people on the streets" "Turned away from it all" "Like a blind man" "Sat on a fence but it don't work" "Keep coming up with love but it's so slashed and torn" "Why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Love, love, love, love" "Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking" "Can't We give ourselves one more chance" "Why can't we give love that one more chance" "Why can't we give love" "Give love, give love Give love, give love" "Give love, give love Give love, give love" "'Cause love's such an old fashioned word" "And love dares you to change our way of" "Caring about ourselves" "This is our last dance" "This is ourselves" "Under pressure" "Under pressure" "Pressure" "Oh, my God, you're like a total rock star." "Like the whole school's obsessed with you." "You're all anyone talks about anymore." "You might want to think about getting a new look." "What do you mean?" "Don't worry, we'll find you something cool, Craig." "Cool Craig." "What?" "Oh, somebody in here calls me that." ""Cool Craig."" "is that somebody a girl?" "Uh, no." "Well, are there any cute girls in there?" "Not really." "Like, a mental hospital probably isn't the best spot to hook up." "I'm dying to see this place." "Can I come visit?" "Sure." "Yeah, you can visit." "That is if you don't mind the groupies hanging all over me." "Hey, get up." "Yeah, sorry, I told you I was famous." "They were just bothering me." "You've really gotta get out of the room more, Muqtada." "There's a whole world out there." "It's just me." "Put these on." "Let's go for a walk." "Oh, my goodness." "Sometimes it's just good to get out of there." "Charlie, my friend." "You got 30 minutes." "Hey, what's the deal with you and Noelle?" "What do you mean?" "What do you mean, what do I mean?" "Don't play dumb with me." "The two of you are like..." "Your energy is like..." "Those were fireworks." "You should ask her out." "Ask her out?" "Yeah." "Ask her out." "Like, out." "Well, I mean, I like her, but I think I'd be too nervous to ask her out." "What are you nervous about?" "Rejection." "Babe, you can't live your life in fear." "You're gonna end up like Muqtada." "Or worse, me." "That's the part where you go, "Hey, Bobby, your life's not that bad," you know." "Oh, sorry, I'm just..." "Relax. lt's okay, babe." "But you shouldn't worry about rejection." "You shouldn't." "You can practice with me." "Practice what?" "Asking Noelle out." "No, that's okay." "Yeah, I'll be Noelle." "I'll be Noelle. I'm Noelle." "Uh..." "Hey, Craig." "How's it going?" "Hey, Noelle." "I'm well." "How are you?" "Oh, good." "I get out of here soon, which is pretty cool." "Do you like music?" "Yeah, sure." "I like live music." "Uh, you just gonna sit there the whole time you're asking her out?" "Stand up. I'm a lady." "No, look man." "You gotta loosen up a little bit." "Come on, loosen up." "Yeah, okay." "Good, good, good." "But I don't like to go see live music by myself." "Oh, okay." "Well, maybe we could go together?" ""Well, okay, uh, maybe we could go together?"" "No." "Say that again." "You gotta use more energy, man." "You gotta go like, "Oh !" You gotta be excited." "Okay." "Yeah, uh..." "Yeah, okay." "Well, maybe we could go together." "Oh !" "Hmm." "Well, well, well." "Who should we see?" "Um..." "U2?" "No." "No." "Vampire Weekend?" "No, no, no." "Don't be one of those douchebags that takes her to some band that she doesn't care about." "This is what you do, and this is very important." "Okay." "Ask her what she likes." "Right." "Yeah." "Women like to be asked questions." "Okay." "Like ask me a question." "I'll be Noelle again." "Um..." "Do a little flirtation in the beginning." "What do you mean by that?" "Comment on my shoes." "Oh, hey, Noelle, those shoes are awesome." "They really look nice." "Oh, you're sweet to say that." "It's nothing." "Good." "You got it." "You're getting it." "You're getting it." "Okay." "Not bad." "How'd you end up in here?" "Man, you don't give up, do you?" "I'm on vacation." "Seriously." "I am serious." "Some people go to the Hamptons." "I come here." "Get a little R  R." "People feed you." "I get high sometimes, man." "That's not what I heard about you." "What'd you hear?" "I heard you tried to rape a penguin at the zoo." "Who told you that?" "Relax, babe." "Funny guy, huh?" "Actually, I..." "I heard your accountant say that you tried to kill yourself." "Well, this may come as a surprise to you, Cool Craig, but, she ain't my accountant." "Gee, really?" "And I've tried to kill myself six times." "I thought about doing that, but I couldn't make it to the bridge." "I just came straight here." "What stopped you?" "My family, I think." "You know, my parents and my sister." "Just knowing how bad it would mess them up." "See, that's the part I don't get, Craig." "I mean, you're cool, you're smart, you're talented." "You have a family that loves you." "You know, what I would do just to be you, for just a day?" "I would..." "I would do so much." "I would..." "I don't know." "I would just..." "I'd just live." "Like it meant something." "Let's go." "Smitty, I found these laying around somewhere." "What's going on?" "Hey, Muqtada." "Are you coming out for a walk?" "What is there to do?" "Well, do you like to draw?" "Ping-pong." "Ping what?" "You like music?" "Yes." "Okay." "Great." "Well, um..." "Only Egypt music." "Oh, well, let's see." "Excuse me, if you please." "I am trying to rest." "Sol, have you met Muqtada?" "If you could please keep it down." "He has sensitive hearing." "This I think is enough for one day." "Hey, Craig." "Hey." "Um, this is a surprise." "Me and Aaron broke up." "I'm sorry." "Are you okay?" "Uh, yeah." "Sorry." "Um..." "You must be really loaded, huh?" "Yeah. I'm pretty zonked." "So, you know I've been thinking about you non-stop since we talked on the phone the other day." "I've been thinking about you a lot, too." "I woke up and my bed was on fire!" "What's wrong with that guy?" "He's schizophrenic." "Weird." "Anyway, it's like you told me all this stuff about you and you're really mature." "Not like everyone else with their stupid little problems." "I mean, you're really, really screwed up." "I'm a mess." "But in a good way." "You know, in the way that gives you So you and Aaron broke up?" "Okay, so I know I should be thinking about NoeIIe, and how I'm supposed to be meeting her in 20 minutes." "But when you have a really gorgeous girl in front of you, and you've been obsessing over her for two years, and she's biting her lip and talking low, and you've got a boner," "what are you gonna do?" "Do you want to see my room?" "You haven't finished that yet?" "What?" "Oh." "Yes, we have a lot of activities here, so..." "Takes up..." "Me and Aaron never did anything like this." "This was totally on my checklist." "is someone else in here?" "I'm gonna be sick." "Sex!" "Sex in my bed !" "God, that's disgusting." "Children make sex in my bed !" "Craig, who is this?" "Um, this is my roommate, Muqtada." "Don't talk to her!" "She try and make sex in my bed !" "Calm down." "No one was having sex, okay?" "Woman is temptress!" "I know." " What's wrong with you?" " Get out." "Uh, he's going through a hard time." "No, you !" "What's wrong with you?" "I'm also going through a hard time." "Um, you know what?" "You should get some rest, and I'll call you tomorrow or something." "Nia." "Nia, wait." "Wait." "Nia." "I love you." "Just get better, Craig." "No, I mean..." "Noelle." "Noelle, please." "I'm sorry I messed up." "I love your portrait." "It's amazing." "I wish you'd open the door." "Are you okay?" "Oh." "Uh..." "This is pretty cool, too." "So, our meeting tonight." "is it safe to assume that's not happening?" "You've had it figured out all along, Muqtada." "Never get out of the bed." "I got in." "In what?" "In your mama." "Oh." "I got in the home." "That's great." "We missed you at breakfast." "is this about this whole Nia/Noelle fiasco?" "How do you know about that?" "Solomon." "That dude's got sensitive hearing." "Look, it's not just women, okay?" "I can't do anything right." "My life's a mess." "No, my life is a mess." "Muqtada's life is a mess." "No offense, babe." "All good, papa." "Look, I happen to like you, Craig." "You remind me of me when I was your age." "I was much better looking, and I didn't have as much trouble with women..." "Get back on track, man." "The point is, in 20 years, if you're celebrating your daughter's eighth birthday in a place like this," "I swear to God," "Muqtada and I are going to kick your ass." "He not busy being born, is busy dying." "You need to believe that." "This Bobby, I think, very wise man." "By the way, I was just coming in to tell you that I'm not gonna be homeless tomorrow." "I'm just saying." "And guess what?" "It's right next door to the YMCA." "Yeah." "So we can go swimming in the swimming pool, and maybe play table tennis." "Ping-pong, yes." "It's the same thing." "So listen, your mom will bring you by on Saturday, and we could have a feast." "There are so many people, you know, not just in this hospital, but in the whole world, who are struggling so hard just to live." "And, it's like, self-indulgent for me to not appreciate what I have." "Like what?" "Well, there's my family, my home, and my friends." "And you know, there's this." "I used to think art was just bourgeois decadence, but..." "It's really wonderful, Craig." "Thanks." "Um..." "Yeah, I've done about 20 of them and it's something that I really enjoy." "What do you enjoy about it?" "It's fun." "And it takes my mind off the things that stress me out." "You gonna continue it when you leave?" "Yeah." "Or, I think." "But my dad might freak." "Have you told him how you feel?" "Not yet." "But you will?" "I think so." "Thank you." "It's my last night tonight, Smitty." "It is your last night, Craig." "I hate to break it to you, Craig, but I think I'm really gonna miss you." "Well, it's Bobby's last night, too, so I was wondering if we could have a pizza party." "Yes, we can." "Yeah." "Do you have the money?" "If you can get the money." "Yeah, no, I'll have the money." "Yeah, I..." "You have records you could bring?" "Hey, um, thanks for coming." "I just wanted to say, I'm really sorry about what happened yesterday." "That girl I was with, she's my best friend's girlfriend." "I've been obsessed with her forever and..." "And you're in love with her?" "No." "Well, of course not." "But you think she's hot, so you told her what you thought she'd want to hear." "And now you're going to do the same thing to me." "No, I'm not." "You're not?" "Look, um, I do think you're hot." "And I do want to say the right thing, but that's only because I really like you." "I like how you don't hide your problems like everyone else." "And I feel like I don't have to hide mine when I'm around you." "You know, I've been thinking about it a lot recently, and I've realized that" "if you're not busy being born, you're busy dying." "And I, for one, think that we could both benefit from being born, again." "Not being born again, but you know what I mean?" "Gee, thanks for the wisdom, Bob." "What?" "He told you that, too?" "Who?" "Bobby." "Yeah, me and about a billion other people." "Bob Dylan." "It's the song you just quoted." "What?" "No." "Yes." "Oh." "Anyway, my point is I want to play doctor with you." "This is awesome." "So, how come you never asked me why?" "Why what?" "I guess I just assumed you'd tell me when you wanted me to know." "Thanks." "Do you like music?" "Do you like breathing?" "That's right." "It was a dumb question." "I like..." "I like Radiohead a lot, the Pixies, T. Rex." "Oh, what else?" "Have you seen them live?" "I saw Radiohead and the Pixies once." "Cool." "So, uh..." "You know, Vampire Weekend's doing a show at the end of the month." "Would you want to go?" "Yes, I would." "With you, right?" "No, with Solomon." "Yeah, with me." "Sorry guys." "Um..." "This is about to get pretty sappy, so I'm just gonna give you the highlights." "This is me sharing the realization that" "I don't actually want to be a CEO, lawyer, or President." "This is Noelle," "laughing at the idea that I once wanted to be President." "Here, NoeIIe suggests I "screw"" "the Gates Summer application if it makes me so unhappy." "This is me liking that idea." "This is me thinking about how to tell my dad." "This is after I tell Noelle how beautiful I think she is." "Okay, just have them send the delivery guy to the third floor." "3 North." "No problem, sport." "You got it." "Thanks, Dad." "Sure." "Yeah, I'll see you and Mom tomorrow." "I'II see you then." "Okay, bye." "Bye." "Hey, Muqtada." "Hello?" "Hey, man." "I could really use a favor." "Hey, found it." "I so appreciate this." "Yeah, no problem." "Look, man, I'm sorry I was a bitch to you." "I'm sorry I tried to make out with your girlfriend." "How are things with Nia?" "Um, we're gonna try and work through it." "Good." "You know, I might hide it pretty well, but, I mean, I get that depression stuff, too, sometimes." "Yeah?" "Don't kill yourself, okay?" "I won't." "Seriously." "Thanks." "I'll call you tomorrow, all right?" "Yeah, you will." "Hey, um..." "Did you really try to make out with Nia?" "Dick." "Pizza's getting cold." "What's up?" "I'm tired, man." "Think I'll skip out on the pizza shin-dig." "Pack up." "Ah, vacation's over." "Yes, back to work." "You got a job?" "No." "Well, congratulations on your home." "Thanks." "You know, I used that Dylan line on Noelle." "How'd it go?" "Good." "We're gonna hang out soon." "Yeah?" "Maybe see some music." "Good." "Here." "It's you." "Yikes. it's a mess in there, man." "Oh, it's not such a mess." "It's just undergoing renovations." "Look, I wrote my number on the back." "We should get together sometime, play some table tennis." "Sure." "Cool." "Well, I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast." "Good luck, Craig." "Not that you need it, but..." "Thanks." "You, too, babe." "Hey, come on." "Trust me." "I gotta dance." "Excuse me?" "I like this." "I like this." "Yeah !" "Look." "So long, buddy." "You should probably stay longer." "You might lose it on the outside." "Um, I'll take my chances." "It'll come to you !" "Okay, I know you're thinking, "What is this?" ""Kid spends a few days in the hospital" ""and all his problems are cured?"" "But I'm not." "I know I'm not." "I can tell this is just the beginning." "I still need to face my homework, my school, my friends." "My dad." "Hello, Smitty." "Hey, hey." "Thanks for everything." "Yeah." "Sure." "You're very welcome, sir." "Have you seen Bobby around?" "Yeah, Bobby left pretty early this morning." "But the difference between today and last Saturday is that for the first time in a While, I can look forward to the things I want to do in my Iife." "How you feeling?" "I feel like..." "Like I can handle it." "Bike, eat, drink, talk." "Ride the subway, read, read maps." "Make maps, make art." "Finish the Gates application." "tell my dad not to stress about it." "Hug my mom." "Kiss my little sister." "Kiss my dad." "Make out with Noelle." "Make out with her more." "Take her on a picnic." "See a movie with her." "See a movie with Aaron." "Heck, see a movie With Nia." "Have a party." "tell people my story." "Volunteer at 3 North." "help people like Bobby." "Like Muqtada." "Like me." "Draw more." "Draw a person." "Draw a naked person." "Draw Noelle naked." "Run, travel, swim, skip." "Yeah, I know it's lame, but, Whatever." "Skip anyway." "Breathe." "Live."