"Hello." "Ya?" "..." "What?" "Sir kindly switch off your mobile phone." "Just one sec one sec please!" "Excuse me!" "Sir please sit down!" "Captain there is a medical emergency" "A passenger has just fallen down on the aisle" "Delhi Air India 11 returning to medical emergency" "Sir excuse me, sir excuse me sir" "One minute!" "I'm alright now" "Thank you!" "You can all go now" "I'll go now" "Gentlemen wait!" "Get the vehicle" "Are you Mr.Dullon" "Why?" "Should I tatoo my name here?" "Take out the vehicle fast!" "Ok sir!" "Come sir" "Should go to hotel right sir?" "Ya ya we'll go hotel" "But through Vasant Vihar, take me there" "Put some load on accelerator kaake!" "Ya Farhan, tell me" "You come out fast, I'm reaching your place in 5 min" "What happened dude?" "Chatur had called" "Remember him?" "Who, "Silencer"?" "Ya ya" "He says Rancho is coming" "What are you saying?" "If you wanna meet Rancho come to campus at 8, on the tank" "Oh, shaks..." "Hey you come out fast" "Ya okay ok" "Sruthi I'll be back in sometime" "Ooh shoes..." "Hey I got my friend back what?" "Hey I'll come back and speak to you!" "At least wear pants and go!" "Now can we go to hotel sir?" "We'll go to hotel kaake But only after going to the "Imperial College of Engineering"" "Okay sir!" "Forgot to take socks dude!" "You talking about socks?" "Hey look down even pants you forgot!" "Ooh..." "Sir now you can go to hotel?" "!" "Yes, but only after going to airport because my sir is coming there." "Take him to hotel!" "Same surname - "Dullon"." "I'm Dullon!" "Where the hell did you sent taxi?" "Is it on the runway?" "Oye Rancho" "Hey Chatur." "Where is Rancho?" "Rancho" "Where is Rancho?" "Welcome idiots" "Wanna drink madiera (rum)" "This is that rum you all used to drink here?" "Have a drink" "Hey where is Rancho?" "I'll tell you" "First you watch this" "Not my wife..." "Look at the bungalow behind idiots: 3.5 million" "Swiming pool." "Heated!" "Living room maple wood flooring" "My new Lamborghini. 6496cc." "Sss... very fast" "Hey, why you showing all these to us?" "Forgot?" "What is this?" "5 September... today's date..." "What year?" "Let's bet... after 10 years we'll come back" "Here, on this same day" "And we'll see who is the more successful?" "Do you dare?" "..." "Say, will you come?" "..." "Will you come?" "Remember something now?" "Here." "I kept the bet with that idiot" "I kept my promise" "I'm back he he" "Stupid" "I left my flight and came" "He left his pants and came just to meet Rancho" "For 5 years we're searching for him." "Don't know if he's dead or alive." "Do you think he'll come for this stupid bet?" "He won't come." "I know he won't come he he eh" "What?" "Will you break his teeth or shall I do it...?" "One min Farhan, one min" "Idiot." "Then why did you call us over here?" "To meet Rancho" "Come and see where he stayed back and where I reached!" "Means that you know where is Rancho?" "aah?" "Yes" "Where is Rancho?" "He is in Shimla!" "#.....he was like a fleeting wind.....# #....." "like a flutterting kite.....# #.....where did he go?" "let's find him.....#" "#.....he was like a fleeting wind.....# #....." "like a flutterting kite.....# #.....where did he go?" "let's find him.....# #.....while confined channel guided us.....# #.....he would define his pathways.....# #.....and loiter along them merrily.....#" "#.....while our future haunted us.....# #.....he would celebrate the present.....# #.....and live every moment with reckless freedom .....#" "#.....where did he come from?" ".....# #....touching our hearts .....# #.....where did he go?" "let's find him.....#" "#.....he was like a shade in sweltering heat .....# #....." "like village in desert .....# #.....he was like salve for our distress .....# #.....while we cowered from challenges .....# #.....he would dive in seas .....#" "#.....and swim against the rip currents .....# #.....he was a wandering cloud .....# #.....he was our pal .....# #.....where did he go?" "let's find him.....#" "Rancho!" "Ranchhodas Shamaldas Chanchad" "How different his name was?" "That same different thoughts" "Since childhood we heard that life is like a race..." "If you don't run fast others will overtake you..." "Damn!" "To take birth..." "I had to race among 300 million sperms he he eh 1978." "I was born at 5.15am" "And at 5.16am my dad said:" "My son will become engineer!" "Farhan Qureshi!" "B-Tech engineer" "And my fate was sealed!" "What I wanted to become?" "Nobody asked me though?" "Raju Rastogi" "Ranchhoddas Chanchad" "Tell me your room number!" "D26" "Follow me" "I'm Manmohan" "M.M." "All these enginneers call me Millimeter" "Milk, egg, bread, wash clothes, iron clothes, filling journals, copying assignment" "Let it be any work tell me!" "Fixed rate no bargain!" "One min, one min hold this..." "This is kilobyte" "This is megabyte and this is his mother, gigabyte" "Take their pictures... this family doesn't byte [bite]" "[Raju praying]" "Tere comes one more big believer!" "Hi Farhan Qureshi..." "I'm Raju Rastogi" "Don't worry" "After few days here... your belief in God will vanish eventually" "Only naked girls posters sticked by your bed... and you'll say" "Oh God" "Give me one, at least once!" "Hey get out of here!" "Out, out!" "Give 4 rupees 2 rupees per bag" "Here's 5 rupees... keep the change" "Wow sir, you gave me tip" "I'll also give you a tip" "Tonight... wear underwear which doesn't have holes!" "why?" "Oh Emperor..." "You are great..." "Accept our gift" "Aaahh" "This is he-man, he-man take this..." "Ohoo... white white white" "We were humiliated," "Hands saluting," "Heads down like slaves," "When we saw Rancho for the first time!" "New gift... gift gift gift gift!" "Namaste sir!" "Remove your pants and get sealed!" "Whats your name?" "Tell..." "Ranchhodas Shamaldas Chanchad!" "Huuii hhehehhee" "Listen brothers learn by-heart!" "By final year you'll learn!" "hmmm" "Remove your pants... remove pants" "Ooh, so you won't listen like this huh?" "Don't wear wet pants kid?" "Come, remove it now!" "Aal iz well, aal iz well.......[Ranchod baba mantra lol]" "What is he saying?" "Someone make him understand!" "Hey, James Bond, make him understand!" "hmm" "Take off your pants, or they're gonna piss on you" "Oye English!" "Feeling shy to speak in Hindi huh?" "Sorry sir I was born in Uganda, and studied in Pondicherry!" "So little slow in Hindi!" "So slowly make him understand!" "Who is in a hurry here?" "Worn again huh?" "[in pure Hindi!" "laughing stock] take off your pants or they're gonna piss on you..." "He is telling piss as Muthravisarjan?" "hahahha" "Ooh here come pandit learning engineering" "Hey come out you idiot" "Come out" "Come out or else I'll piss on your door!" "I'll count till 10 if you don't come out" "I'll piss on your door for the whole semester" "Salt water is a great conductor of electricity 8th standard physics" "We all studied it!" "He applied it!" "ICE's director's name was Dr.Viru Shastrabhuddi" "But every one calls him Virus" "All called him Computer Virus!" "Oye Virus is comin, carrying eggs with him" "He has said first years to come down come fast" "Virus was the most competetive man we had ever seen" "If someone overtakes him even one step." "He couldn't accept it," "To save time he used velcro instead of buttons" "And a hook in tie!" "He has trained his mind" "That he can write using both his hands at the same time" "Everday at 2 he used to take a power nap of exactly 7.5 minutes and used to listen opera" "Govind had to do all unproductive works like shaving, cutting nails in this 7.5 mins" "What is this?" "Sir, a nest!" "whose?" "cuckoo bird's nest" "Cuckoo bird never builds a nest." "They lay their eggs on other birds nest" "And when their babies come to the world, what do they do first?" "They kick out other eggs from the nest..." "Competition over" "The life begins with murder" "That's nature..." "Compete" "Or die!" "You all so are like the cuckoo birds" "And these are those eggs whom you kicked out and reached ICE" "Don't forget" "Because every year, 4 lakh applications comes to ICE" "Among them only 200 will be selected" "You" "And these" "Finished" "Broken eggs!" "My own son applied for 3 years" "Rejected" "Everytime" "Remember life is a race!" "If you don't run fast someone will beat you and move faster than you..." "Let me tell you very interesting story" "This is an astronauts pen" "In space, fountain pen, ball pen cannot be used" "So after spending millions of dollars" "Scientists invented this pen!" "With this you can write in any angle, any temperature, zero gravity" "One day when I was a student, the director of our institute called me" "He said "Viru Shastrabhuddi." I said "yes sir"" "Come here!" "I got scared" "He showed me this pen" "He said this is a symbol of excellence" "I give it to you" "And the day when you get a extraordinary student like you" "Pass this pen to him" "For 32 years Viru Shastrabhuddi is waiting for the next Viru Shastrabhuddi" "Anyone here in this batch to honour this pen?" "Good, hands down" "Should I write on the notice board?" "I said put down your hands" "Sir I have a question sir..." "If in space fountain pen, ball pen don't work why astronauts didn't try pencil?" "Could've saved millions of dollars" "I will get back to you on this" "That fellow kicks seniors And irritates the director" "I'm telling you if we stay with him..." "He will put us in trouble" "Buddy, your thought screwed Virus completely" "Oh Emperor, you're great." "Accept our gift..." "Get lost, don't you have school?" "Who'll pay fees?" "Your father?" "You're naming my father?" "Hey stop!" "Stop Raju, what are you doing?" "Eh listen!" "No fees required for schooling!" "Uniform is required, uniform..." "Whichever school you like go, get the uniform of that school." "Go sit in the class..." "Who'll come to know when there is a huge population?" "If I get caught?" "If they catch you, then change uniform, school!" "ehhe" "There was really something special about him," "He always used to challenge everything in the world, each and every move..." "He was the only one free bird in VIRUS's nest..." "We all were just robots operated by professors remote control..." "But he was the only one." "Perhaps not a machine!" "What is a machine?" "why are you smiling?" "Um, actually sir From my childhood I used to dream of studying in an engineering college" "Today I'm sitting over here, feeling excited sir!" "No need to be so overexcited..." "Tell me the definition for machine" "Um..." "Sir" "Machine is anything that reduces human effort sir" "Will you please elaborate...?" "Sir um..." "All those things which makes the work for humans easier are machines sir" "Feeling hot!" "Pressed button, wind blowing, FAN is a machine sir!" "You can talk to your friend miles away." "TELEPHONE is machine sir!" "Calculate crores in less time..." "CALCULATOR is a machine sir" "Sir, actually we are dependent in the world of machines sir" "From PEN NIB to PANTS ZIB... all machines sir!" "One sec up one sec down, up down up down up" "Tell me the definition?" "Sir that's what I'm telling sir." "Will you write all these in exams huh?" ""This is machine up down up down up"?" "IDIOT!" "Anybody else?" ")*#^*#*(%#(*#" ")*%*#%*(#*%#" "$(^($*%#*%#" "*(^%%%$^**^%$%* he he eh bla bla bla bla" "*(#*%(*#%%#" "!" "Wow great !" "Perfect !" "Great." "Please sit down!" "Thank you." "Thank you" "But sir even I said the same in simple language..." "If you like simple language." "You can go join some other arts and commerce college" "But sir, we should understand it at least" "Mugging up from books like this, what's the use sir?" "Oh you know more than books?" "Book has the same definition..." "And if you wanna pass, you'll write this." "But sir, ther are other books also" "Get out!" "Oh why?" "In simple language... please go outside..." "IDIOT!" "So we were discussing about the machines" "Hey, why do you come back?" "I forgot something sir!" "What?" "Instruments to record, analyse, summarize, organize, debate and explain information, that are elastative and non-elastative, hard bound paper, bag jacketed, non-jacketed with forward introduction, table of cotents index, that are intented for the enlightment, understanding" "enhancement and education of human brains, of sense in root of vision, sometimes touch!" "What are you saying?" "My books sir," "I forgot my books sir, can I take them?" "Couldn't you say in simple way?" "I tried simple before, but you didn't like that way sir..." "Professors used to keep Rancho outside more often than in classroom" "If he got kicked from one class, he'd go to another" "Rancho used to say that knowledge is increasing everywhere wherever you get... gain it!" "He was entirely different from all of us" "We used to fight for bathroom" "But wherever Rancho found water, he had bath there itself!" "He was very much attached to machines" "Used to carry a screwdriver in his pocket wherever he went" "He would open any machine that he found.... some got closed" "Some did not!" "There was another guy just like him" "Joy Lobo" "Sir, excuse me sir" "Mr.Joy Lobo" "Sir, if you mind letting me know about the convocations dates..." "Why?" "Actually dad wanted to get a reservation" "I'm the first engineer in my village sir." "All the relatives wanted to come on the convocation day" "In that case call make a phone call to your dad" "Son please, please don't waste my time, hurry" "Hello" "Dad, director sir will speak to you" "Joy" "Mr.Lobo, your son won't get graduated this year" "What happened sir?" "He has violated all the deadlines" "With unrealistic..." "Mr.Lobo, Mr.Lobo..." "unrealistic project, as I said already" "He's making some non-sense helicopter" "Wo I recommend you not to reserve his ticket, I'm so sorry" "Sir I'm just close" "Is your project ready?" "Is your project ready?" "Sir at least take a look at this once sir please" "Submit it." "I'll take into consideration" "Sir give me some extension sir Why should I give you an extension?" "Sir after dads stroke I couldn't concentrate for 2 months sir please" "Did you run out of food and water for 2 months?" "No" "You couldn't take a bath?" "No?" "Then why did you left studies?" "I'm very close sir pls take a look at this sir please.." "Mr.Lobo, my son died falling from train on Sunday afternoon" "Monday morning Viru Shastrabhuddi gave lecture in this college so don't tell me that non-sense" "I can only give you sympathy not extension si...r" "How cool design he made?" "Wireless camera over helicopter?" "Traffic updates security... can be used for all but VIRUS was telling this is an impractical design..." "Won't fly it seems?" "How it won't fly?" "I'll make it fly!" "hm hm" "Hey don't tell Joy will give him surprise we'll make this fly out his window and record his reaction" "If we do his project, who'll do ours?" "Test, viva, quizzes included, there are 42 exams in each semester" "Hey you worry a lot dude" "Take this hand and keep it in your hand and say," "Aal iz well, aal iz well" "Aal iz well" "Aal iz well" "Now he has brought something new our BABA Ranchhodas!" "Hey in our village there was a watchman..." "he used to yell in night saying aal iz well" "And we used to sleep tight" "One night there was a robbery in our village, then we came to know that he's blind," "And he yells aal iz well, aal iz well" "And we used to sleep like fools..." "But that day we came to know about the real fact" "See our heart right, is a big coward..." "Keep our heart as a fool" "If you have any big problem in life" "Tell our heart" "No problem baby everything is ok aal iz well, aal iz well" "Hmm so that will solve problem?" "huh?" "No but still it gains the dareness to survive" "Remember this mantra... this is gonna become more useful over here" "Got it, got it yeah" "Take it to Joy's window" "Hey Joy, up up" "Oye window... see Silencer naked naked heheh ehhe" "Hey Joy come out Joy" "Hey Joy look outside.." "Joy.... #... give me some sunshine.. give me some rain...#" "#... give me another chance I wanna grow up once again.....#" "You've a good news sir.." "Neither police got to know" "Nor Joy's dad...." "Everyone will think it's a suicide, sir" "Reason for death in postmortem report" "Intense pressure in wind pipe resulting in choking" "This fool believed that" "He died because of the pressure here..." "And from the last 4 years of pressure over here?" "What about that?" "Even that's not in the report also sir," "These engineers are so back minded sir" "Didn't even invent some machine, that could really behold the pressure over here..." "If they had does, could've come to know this is not a suicide, it's a murder," "Are you blaming me for the suicide of Joy?" "If one student can't tolerate pressure why I'm I the one responsible?" "So much pressure will come in life..." "Then everytime you'll blame others for that?" "Sir I'm not blaming you sir" "Actually I'm blaming the system" "Sir I've got some statistics" "Sir, in suicides India is no:1 sir" "Every half-hour a student attempts suicide, sir" "Students die less in sickness and more in suicide here sir" "Something is going wrong right sir?" "I can't tell about other colleges but this is one of the finest colleges in the country" "I'm running this college for 32 years" "I brought this college to no:1 from 28th position" "Sir what no:1 sir ?" "Here we don't have any talks related to new ideas, no talks on inventions" "Only great talk on marks, or else job in USA" "We don't gain any knowledge here sir..." "Here they only teach us how to bring good marks..." "Now are you going to teach me how to take a class?" "Please sit down" "Today we have our great leader behind us" "Who claims that he can teach better than our highly qualified teachers" "So today our professor Ranchhodas Chanchad will teach us engineering" "We don't have all day" "You all have 30 secs" "Should find the meaning of the word written on the board" "If you want you can make use of your books too" "The one who gets the answer can lift your hands up" "We'll see who'll come first and who's last" "Your time starts now" "Time up" "Time up sir, time up" "What?" "Nobody got the answer?" "Now rewind 1 min of life a bit and think" "When I asked this question." "Anybody thought that today we will learn something new?" "Anyone, sir" "No" "Everyone sunk in race" "Whats the use if you come first studying like this?" "will you improve your knowledge?" "No." "Only pressure will increase" "And this is a college not a PRESSURE COOKER" "The lion in the circus also learns to sit on the chair fearing the whip held in his owner's hand" "But we call such a lion as well trained, not well educated" "Hello...." "This is not a philosophy class!" "Tell us the meaning of those 2 words," "Sir, actually no such words exists sir" "These are my friend's names" "Farhan and Raju" "Quiet" "Non-sense" "Like this you teach engineering?" "No sir I'm not teaching you engineering, you know better than me" "I was teaching you that, how to teach," "And I believe that you learn someday for sure sir" "Because I never leave my weaker students hand" "Busted" "Quiet" "Quiet I said" "I would regret to inform you that your son Farhan, Raju is going on wrong routes" "If you don't take required action their future will be spoiled" "VIRUS's letters fell down in our homes like an atom bomb" "There was mourning in Hiroshima and Nagasaki!" "And we were invited to both the home to get kicked" "Come, come inside" "See there" "We could only afford one airconditioner" "And we didn't keep in our bedroom, we kept it in Farhans bedroom for him to study conveniently" "I didn't buy a car, rode a scooter till now" "Invested all money in Farhans studies" "We sacrificed our future for Farhan's better future.. did you understand or not?" "Then can you imagine what I must be going through!" "Hey you took all these photos Farhan?" "Quiet" "He has the ghost of photography in his head" "He used to take the images of animals and used to say he wanted to become wild life photographer" "Son what was your percentage that year?" "91 percent" "Did you hear that?" "From 94 percent straight down to 91 pecent" "You feel it funny?" "No no uncle no" "I was telling how great pictures he has taken" "Why you making him an engineer you could've made him a wild life photographer" "I'm folding my hands and requesting you" "Please don't spoil my son's future" "Kids" "Come let's eat somethin" "When you come next time have food and go...." "Dad though didn't give us food," "And at last to fill our hungry stomachs, and to fill the quota of advise" "We reached Raju's home" "Raju's home reminds us about the 1950's black and white films" "One small bed where his paralysed father rest" "One coughing mother" "And one sister at her age of marriage" "Sofa with all springs out" "And 24 hours running water from terrace" "Mother was retired from school and almost tired everytime..." "His dad was a postmaster at his age" "After paralysis he lost his half body and salary completely...." "And sister!" "Kammo (Raju's sister) is 28 now..." "Asking Maruthi 800 as dowry..." "If don't study and all how she'll get married?" "Take lady's finger curry.. hand jee thank you" "You know what?" "Lady's finger has now become 12 rupees per kg" "And cauliflower 10 rupees" "World is looting all over" "These kind of letters come from college" "What will we eat?" "Want paneer?" "Someday back you get little of paneer in Goldsmith's shop" "Want paneer?" "No no enough" "Mom just leave it keep quiet, what?" "Ok ok, I'll keep quiet" "Earn for kids, work like a servant, and after all these keep mouth shut?" "Hey these all our news if I don't tell it to my son, to whom will I say?" "to his friends?" "Hey Raju" "It was a big confusion whether we should control our friend or wipe his mother's tears" "Then we thought to leave all these matter, and let's concentrate on mattar paneer now," "Even his exhema's cream comes for 55 rupees now" "Want more roti son?" "No no." "Done." "No." "Stomach is filled aunty" "Lady's finger 12 rupees and caulli flower 10 rupees hehheee" "At least we offered you some food unlike your hungy father" "Hitler Qureshi" "Huh huh." "Your mom is Mother Theresa right?" "She was serving us itchy roti" "Don't make fun of my mother" "Hey leave it, why you all fighting?" "Feeling damn hungry." "Come let's go have some food outside" "This is the end of month." "Who'll give money?" "His mom, Mother Teresa?" "To have food doesn't require money dude, uniform is required uniform" "Watch there.." "Come" "Come" "Namaste jee, namaste" "Ooh uncle" "Hey, listen, get us 3 glasses of vodka" "Half soda half water" "What are the starters available?" "What ever get us two plates each" "And leave this here" "And change the music yaar." "Put some ghazal or something" "Pia what the hell is this?" "What have you worn?" "Bloody 18th century watch?" "What people will say?" "Watch Suhas's fiance, she is gonna become doctor," "And she's wearing a watch just costing 200 bucks?" "Please take it off." "Thank you" "Hi handsome" "Hey aunty," "You're looking good" "Don't miss my set darling" "Rubies?" "From Mendelaves.." "Mendelave, wow!" "Hey let's go meet David, come I'll show you, of course, of course" "Excuse me" "Yes" "Um... flowers" "Um..." "Can I take this glass?" "Why?" "What if you break my head with a glass?" "Why should I throw this on you?" "Because I'm gonna give you some free advice," "What?" "Don't ever marry that fool," "Excuse me" "He is not a human, he is just a price tag, price tag" "He'll embarrass you telling all prices of different things all your life," "Your life will be spoiled and your future will be finished," "Should I give a demo?" "Should I find out what's the price for his shoes?" "I'm not gonna ask him, he himself will reveal, just a sec" "Oh my God!" "Hey hey" "What have you done?" "These are 300 $ shoes" "You dropped mint chutney on my 300 $ shoes!" "Run away, it's a free advise, take it or leave it" "Genuine Italian leather hand stiched" "Dad" "Are these your guests?" "These are my students" "Why they're here?" "One sec" "This is really good dude, smelling very good," "Hey no space for puri dude, adjust it by side, ohh" "Hi" "Hey, hi," "You helped me opening up my eyes, thank you so much" "Nothing like that..." "It was my duty!" "can I ask you for a little more help?" "Ya ya" "My dad won't allow me to break the engagement with Suhas" "How great you explain!" "It would be good if you give a demo for him also" "Ya ya." "Why not, why not?" "I'll give a demo" "Raju get me chutney," "You're really sweet," "Where is he, where is your dad?" "Totally behind you," "Ooh" "Aal iz well, aal iz well" "Run away, it's a free advise." "Take it or leave it" "What are you all doing here?" "Um sir... we'll go on the stage, give this envelope and come sir" "Give it to me" "This is my sister's marriage" "Umm." "Sis, sister?" "Sir, totally how many daughters do you have, sir?" "It's empty!" "As though we didn't invite you" "You all might be from groom's side right?" "No sir." "Actually we're from science's side sir" "How?" "Can you explain?" "Dad, he explains really good," "Now he'll give a demo" "Um... sir in Delhi, power goes out frequently sir" "And this really affects the marriage too sir so I thought to make an inverter" "That can generate power from all cars that has come in the marriage," "Ohh" "Wow" "And did you make the inverter?" "Sir, design is ready sir!" "Um..." "Where is the design Farhan?" "I've given you the design right?" "Aah, I had given it to Raju," "Raju?" "The design?" "Sir, actually, leave it sir, I'll make the inverter itself and show you directly," "You can only make us fool, not an inverter!" "No sir, I'll surely make the inverter, I promise" "And I'll give your name for the inverter" "Because after all it had been invented in your daughter's marriage so it's an honour" "Farhan, Raju..." "I wish to meet both of you in the office tomorrow" "Sir what was your per plate cost sir," "We'll pay sir" "In terms of installment sir" "And afterward we won't intrude in any marriage sir" "I won't even go into my marriage sir," "Infact I won't even marry sir." "Even he won't marry sir" "Huh huh, even I won't sir" "Even your parents shouldn't have married" "2 idiots wouldn't have taken birth in this world" "Sit!" "Pay attention..." "?" "This is Ranchhodas's father's monthly income 2.5 crores rupees," "Now from this," "One, or let it be two zeros if you remove out..." "Doesn't make much difference to bother," "But if one more zero is less," "I would worry a little" "This is your father's monthly income, Mr.Farhan!" "Ye... yes sir," "And now if you make it one more zero less," "Now this is your family income Mr.Raju Rastogi," "Big reason to worry," "Follow Viru Shastrabhuddi's suggestion, change your rooms" "And get shifted with Chatur Ramalingam" "Exams are closer, and if you are with that Chanchad," "You'll never pass exams!" "#..... opera started......#" "Wanna get shaved?" "No sir," "Then get lost!" "Raju you try to understand," "VIRUS is playing games between us, divide and rule" "Don't get scared," "Had to be scared!" "For me to get a good job, I need good grades." "And the grades are within his hands" "I don't have a rich father like you..." "Using those money, I could spend the rest of my life" "Hey Raju, what non-sense are you telling?" "Should we do whatever he says huh?" "Aal iz well, aal iz well?" "You'll be the only one who's gonna catch his tail not me," "Now you're crossing the line" "No." "I'm making line in between, because I have to support my family!" "Mom's half salary has been spend on dad's medicines" "Sister's marriage is not happening," "As the groom wants maruthi 800 from past 5 years" "Mom didn't even buy one saree yaar..." "Now in this argument..." "If you are getting mother's saree in between..." "What can I say?" "yaar... so like that how many sarees are reserved for one year?" "heheh" "Don't make fun of my mother," "Hey Raju we will study, with complete dedication we'll study," "But not only to pass exams," "Some great scholar has said, "never study to be successful, study for self efficiency"" "Don't run behind success," "Excellence" "Follow behind excellence" "Success will come all way behind you," "Who?" "The great scholar said this?" "BABA Ranchhodas?" "Hey hey." "Don't take tension yaar" "We'll top the exams yaar, nothing is impossible!" "Nothing is impossible?" "Huh?" "Take this" "Now put this back, k!" "Raju changed his train's bogey" "Now he started the journey (saffar) with Chatur," "Not the "saffar" in Hindi," "English's SUFFER" "S" "SUFFER hehhehe" "Everyone calls Chatur as "Silencer"" "To make his mind even more sharper, he used to eat some bengali BABA's PAN, and he used to leave his HOT AIR!" "I didn't do it!" "Raju.... and he always put the blame on others!" "SILENCER used to mug up 18 hours a day and during exam's night, he used to distract others from study #.... ooh baby.... come on baby ye.....# he believed in two ways of topping exams" "one is to get marks by yourself, or try reducing other's marks" "Rancho has made the combined plan to teach Silencer a lesson and to help Raju," "Our director sir has done much miracle here," "Chamatkaar (miracle) means...." "I don't want the meaning Dubey Jee, I'll memorize it...." "Chatur has been chosen to present introductory speech on teacher's day" "He wrote speech in pure Hindi from librarian Dubey Jee to impress VIRUS," "Hello, yes, will call," "Chatur, you have a call" "Dubey Jee, please keep this print out with you, I'll come back sometime, ooh, even do that work also..." "Hey Dubey Jee!" "director sir has remembered you, ya now ok, you give this to Chatur, I'll come back now" "hello, hello hello Mr.Ramalingam, yes ya I'm calling from Lajpat Nagar police station," "Are you from Uganda?" "Yes sir," "Hmm." "Your life is under risk, what how?" "Umm..." "Listen to my instructions carefullly" "Else when you step out from the college gate you'll face death in centre of road itself," "Why?" "What happened?" "By the time Chatur recovers from this shock," "Before that Rancho changed a few words in the speech like....." "Chamathkaar [=miracle] has become Balathkaar [=rape]" "Did you call me sir?" "who are you?" "Dubey the librarian," "I'm permenant sir," "CONGRATULATIONS!" "Um... one min, one min" "Commisioner sir's call, hold on," "Excuse me sir..." "Take the phone." "Take it." "What to say?" "Ya ya, where was I?" "You were telling, outside gate, my death" "Huh!" "When you go out the gate, you a see a signal in front of you" "Traffic signal!" "Huh okay, okay..." "When that signal becomes red, all vehicle will stop, okay, okay then then you cross the road carefully, you know why son, nowadays' traffic is huge so if any vehicle hits you or somethin, you might die" "what non-sense I know that!" "Oh you know that, very good son, then you are safe." "well done, well done." "#......became a fool.......#" "Hey SILENCER!" "Dubey has given you this," "Hey you don't call me that CHANCHAD," "CHANCHAD" "Director told me that he didn't call me," "He didn't call you, I said that he remembered you!" "Idiots..." "Respected teachers," "Chief guest minister Shri RD Tripati Ji," "Students and dear friends..." "Today if ICE is touching sky high limits, then the credit goes to only one man" "Shri Viru Shastrabhuddi" "Give him a hand," "Sir he's saying it... but every word is mine he is a great guy, really you are," "for the past 32 years he had continuosly in this college, has done rapes after rapes," "this means... miracles upon miracles hope he continues to do so" "We're all amazed... how a person of his age can do these many rapes?" "with his extreme self discipline... he has made himself this capable" "right usage of time attention to details..." "Everyone, learn from him, learn from him, learn from him..." "Sit down." "Sit down" "Today..." "We're all students here." "Tomorrow, we'll spread across so many countries" "I promise you all" "Whichever country we visit... we'll rape!" "We'll enlighten the name of ICE!" "We'll show everyone," "The capability to perform rape that students have here" "No other student across the globe has it!" "No other student, no other student!" "Respected minister.." "Namaskar" "You have given that thing for this institution...." "That we needed the most..." "Money money!" "Tits" "Not that...." "That means ****" "What kind of offensive speach is this?" "Everyone has tits..." "But keep them for themselves..." "Nobody shares... eeaan eaan?" "This guy is too vulgar" "You have placed your tits in the hands of this rapist" "Now let us see," "What he does with them..." "Shastrabhuddi, don't you have so much of brains" "Indecent guy..." "On this golden occasion, I'd like to quote a shlok... listen listen... now he'll explain the farting strength gradation in sanskrit" "Utthamam dadhdadaath paadam [ when I fart loudest is at its best (like motor vehicle)... ] paadam?" "!" "?" "[ =fart ] ooh Silencer!" "..." "Madyam paadam..... tuchuka tuchuk." "[ without full pressure it comes like thuchuka thuchuk (the sound of train) ] kanishtam thud thudiya paadam [ with controlled pressure it sounds thud thudi (sound of a sirene)... ] sur suriiee.... praana gatakam..." "[ but the silent ones are breath of life (aka silent killers)... ] see, without understanding if you cram things, this will be the result, see see" "By cramming, you can save 4 years of your college life.." "but for the next 40 years of your life, you'll go on getting raped... aare yaar, we're explaining him so much.." "but still he doesn't seem to get it." "madyam paadam thuchuk thuchuk... unbelievable yaar...." "You done the right point.." "Rancho how fun it was...... hehe poor fellow didn't had any idea...... hey you hey you swines.." "in what way have I harmed you?" "eheh ehe hey sorry dude don't take it personally," "I'll take it personally," "Chatur Ramalingam is not gonna forget this insult," "I'll think of it every minute, every sec of my life dude leave it, acttually we were giving demo for Raju... that don't cram things and study." "understand and study..enjoy the beauty of science yaar" "I'm not here to enjoy..." "Then what?" "..." "Are you here to rape?" "Or have you come here to rape science!" "...tuchuk tuchuk!" "laugh...!" "laugh on my methods.." "one day using this methods..." "I'll become successful and show everyone and then I'll laugh... and you'll cry!" "yaar, you're boarding the wrong train again don't run behind success...... become such great engineer that success follows you... these ideals don't work in the real world CHANCHAD" "You board your train... and I'll board mine and after 10 years from now..." "We'll come back to this same station on this same date, we'll see whose more successful!" "you?" "or me!" "do you dare...?" "do you dare...?" "then let's bet....tell me will you come..?" "will you come..?" "will you come..?" "what are you doing yaar?" "what has happened to him?" "!" "what is he writing yaar?" "don't forget this date..." "I'm not used to such expensive gifts, Suhas!" "Get used to it Pia.." "You're gonna be Suhas tandon's wife!" "Where's the bill man?" "I'll be back huh!" "You had changed the speech right?" "..." "Don't lie!" "Ooh..." "Umm..." "Yeah." "what problem do you have with my dad, huh?" "I don't have any problem with him." "I'm making an inverter on his name... see this ooh... broke it!" "why are you behind my dad, huh?" "because he's not running a college, but a factory." "where donkeys are manufactured every year...." "See..." "See over there..." "Your donkey" "How dare you call him a donkey!" "Then what else should I call him?" "First he did engineering... then MBA..." "and after that he went to America to work for a bank... heeeh" "If he had to work in a bank only, then why did he do engineering?" "for such donkeys..." "life only means profit or loss statement... he's seeing there's profit being with you, that's why he's with you you, director's daughter whose gonna be a doctor, it's good for his image etc etc" "He has no attachment with you... what do you think of yourself?" "what do you mean by saying Suhas is not interested in me?" "aare... you bought new watch?" "... one minute... hold this" "I have to show you demo everytime..." "Hey Suhas!" "where were you?" "..." "I've been looking for you!" "she lost her watch yaar... she's searching for it... what!" "?" "!" "?" "..." "You lost the watch?" "aare leave it yaar... get a new one aare it cost 4 lakhs..... 4 lakhs!" "?" "!" "... mine cost only 150 yaar but shows the same time" "Oh shut up!" "how could you be so careless Pia?" "This careless attitude is disgusting" "It's disrespectful that was a limited edition watch you just lost!" "You got it 4 free... so that's it..." "Now you wear your 18th century watch at dinner." "what?" "... what are you staring at?" "huh..." "Now you'll start crying." "Real mature Pia" "I can't handle this..." "Now stop crying and search!" "seach for some other hand for this watch... donkey!" "hey.." "You're solid yaar.." "You said donkey to him on his face!" "get lost!" "yaar it's too much noisy here right..?" "she's saying thank you to me, but I hear it as get lost" "I said get lost only!" "aare yaar, why're you getting so angry?" "do you know... actually you never had loved him at all!" "what do you mean?" "means... whenever he comes in front of you.." "have you ever felt like wind is blowing..or dupatta/veil is flying in slow motion?" "or the moon looks even bigger in the sky....?" "such things only happens in a film, not in real life!" "aare no-no..it happens in real life also....if you love a human, it'll happen... it doesn't happen with donkeys #.... phone ringing...#" "hello!" "..ya what?" ".." "Oh God!" ".." "ok ok.." "I'm coming..ya bye bye hey.." "You're a medical student right?" "I need your help..." "It's an emergency." "Please, please!" "Come with me." "Please aare yaar.." "You doctors take an oath that you'll never say no to a patient!" "what do you call it: hippocratic oath?" "yaar help me yaar... please... it's an emergency... please" "You barged into my sister's engagement, you broke my engagement" "Dad is taking BP pills because of you and I'm helping you over here unbelivable!" "this hippocratics... it has just ruined doctor's life!" "aunty, where is Raju?" "he's gone to get a taxi... we called for an ambulance two hours ago." "our country is so weird... there is a guarantee for pizza to arrive in 30 mins... but an ambulance!" "He must be hospitalised..." "Urgently!" "Hey stop man!" "Move..move..move..move" "move..move..move..move" "Doctor..doctor.. emergency..emergency.." "Patient" "keep this with you." "Hey Raju" "Idiot, you brought dad on a scooter?" "Then should I have sent him through a speed-post?" "Don't get into my dad's profession!" "where?" "... where is dad?" "ask the doctor!" "this was a close call Pia..." "If it would've been late by 2 or 2.5 hours, then we would have lost him good that you did not wait for an ambulance and got him on a scooter, I'll go now..if there is any problem..call me ok..bye" "Rancho...." "Thank you yaar!" "Idiot, are you saying thank you to a friend...?" "is that Silencer teaching you manners?" "huh?" "Didn't he tell you?" "..." "Friendship is the biggest sthan of a human!" "Go go.." "Now go..." "You guys have exam tomorrow, right?" "aare there are a lot of exams... but dad is mostly only one." "now we'll take the post master sir and go only then!" "Rancho..forgive me yaar..i was frightened!" "Enough..enough.sshhh..quiet..quiet" "Forgive me." "Enough." "Quiet!" "Enough." "Quiet!" "Go... meet dad..." "And don't go with such a gloomy face" "Go" "Thanks yaar" "Go" "#..... he was our pal......#" "Your Scooty saved a life today..." "It's nice." "How much is it?" "Put chutney and see." "Might be, it'll say aaaaaaeeeee...." "Hey." "Happy Independence Day...." "But today is not August 15th" "But it is so for you." "Now you can wear your mom's watch whenever you want!" "Nobody will say why have you worn a 18th century watch and all that!" "bye hey" "how do you know that it was my mom's watch?" "in a sister's wedding. if a girl is nicely dressed head to toe except for an old watch in the hand, what does it mean?" "on that day, you were missing your mom a lot, right?" "yes" "Your mom must have been very beautiful, right?" "yes, how do you know?" "have you seen your dad?" "life is a race..... if you don't run fast.... you'll be like a broken egg of the cuckoo bird" "today we'll teach you how to prepare chutney this chutney is very useful, this is not only to have, but its really useful to understand people too." "now the bad time has gone for you... now you can leave donkeys and start loving humans time is perfect for starting love.... temperature is constant... and the climate is clear and clean.... and if you felt love for someone..." "sure it's gonna rain on you... hello... wake up!" "what..." "Uncle passed away or what!" "what?" "no stupid!" "its already 8:30.. at 9:00,the exam starts.." "You wanna go or not!" "aare yaar... how can you leave him alone here and go!" "I'm there, doctors are there.." "And its only a matter of 3 hours" "C'mon... take my scooter and go..." "Now come on go... it's getting late hey!" "why have you worn an old watch!" "Go!" "sorry sir... we were late... emergency!" "settle down there!" "sir, they are still writing!" "Hello... time up!" "Sir... 5 minutes sir." "We were half-an hour late!" "it was an emergency sir..please please" "Examiner looked at us like we asked for both his kidneys!" "but we still continued to write while he was busy arranging papers according to roll numbers" "it's over sir you're late!" ".." "I can't take your papers sir, please sir" "sir, do you know, who we are?" "even if you are prime minister's son, I won't accept your paper!" "Sir, do you know our names and roll numbers?" "No... who are you guys?" "You don't know... then.. run run run run hey... what's your roll number?" "where is it?" "where is his paper?" "aaaahhh!" "today the results were gonna come scared and innocent!" "... all were busy striking a deal with God" "God... please save me with electronics, I'll break coconuts!" "Oh snake-god!" "..." "Save my physics..." "I shall send one litre of milk everyday!" "Oh cow-god!" "Just... just get me passing marks" "God." "I'll treat Malati and Sangeeta like my sisters." "Please save my results" "God." "God." "I'll offer 100RS per month." "Surely God!" "Promise!" "Nowadays, traffic constables don't accept 100RS." "As if God would fall for it!" "Check... check... check from below... check from below" "It's yours yaar." "In the last... and yours?" "second last!" "and Rancho?" "It's not there yaar!" "My heart sank," "Not because we were last but because our friend had failed!" "Not possible." "It's fine Chatur" "There is a mistake!" "..it's not possible!" "This is injustice..injustice.." "Oh God!" "Why is this idiot Silencer shouting so much?" "He has come second..." "Idiot... whose first then?" "Rancho!" "Rancho...idiot.." "Move... move yaar" "we learnt something about human behaviour that day if your friend fails, you feel sad!" ".." "but if your friend comes first.." "You feel even more sad!" "on that day..we were sad.." "but there were two more people who were sadder than us" "Ranchhoddas Chanchad..first row..right of the director!" "Uday Sinha... second row... third seat!" "Alok Mittal... second row... fifth seat!" "hey!" "Sir... is it compulsory to sit acccording to our ranks?" "why, do you have any problem?" "sir, I have problem with entire grading system itself!" "It's like the caste-system sir!" "A grade students - kings, C grade students - slaves!" "it's not nice sir!" "do you have a better idea for this?" "yes sir, I do have!" "results should not be put up on a notice board.... why should we exhibit someone's weakness in front of all?" "now sir... if in your blood test, the haemoglobin count is less.,." "will the doctor give you tonic... or put up your report on the TV?" "You see sir!" "?" "so basically what you're saying is I must go to each one's room one-by-one and say results in their ears!" "You've come first." "You've come second." "I'm so sorry, you failed!" "No sir, I didn't mean that way but the thing is..grade creates divide..divide" "now see.." "I've come first so I'm sitting with you.." "Whereas my friends have come last." "So they are seated in the last row..." "In a corner" "At least they are sitting in a corner now." "If they continue being with you, next year they won't even be in the photo!" "neither will they pass, nor any company will give them jobs!" "sir, they'll find a job some how sir.... there will be at least few companies.." "which hire people and not machines for work!" "it's not like that sir..they'll find a job.." "I guarentee" "Oh.." "You guarentee it.." "You guarantee it!" "You want to bet?" "Govind.... if even one among those two get a job in the campus interview.." "then shave my moustache!" "ok sir!" "happy?" "happy sir!" "woahhhh!" ".." "by using car's horn.." "You wanna hide your horn..idiot!" "Idiot..." "Septic tank..." "You had the churan again...?" "I didn't do it." "Raaaaju!" "huh..... we've been very used to this hot air from those days.." "This idiot is only responsible for global warming!" "I can't take it!" "Give me..give me your wallet.." "I'll go and buy a pant!" "Leave it yaar..wear this Chatur Ramalingam's suit's pant!" "hey don't you touch my suit!" "leave it yaar.." "Rancho will recognise you even without the pant!" "hey Mr., where's this address?" "brother, if I was so educated... would I be selling groundnuts?" "he doesn't know to read but at least he knows to speak!" "brother..here in Shimla..is there any Ranchhodas Chanchad?" "yes..yes..he stays over there!" "#....he was like the fleeting wind.....# let's go!" "#...." "like a fluttering kite.....# #..... where did he go?" "let find him!" "......# oye Chatur..here's is your bottle of churan!" "Oh thanks..where did you find it?" "it was in the pocket!" "hey..how dare you!" "?" "That's my pant." "hey, what's yours is mine ... it's written in Gita!" "hey shut up... remove the pants hey what are you doing yaar!" "..people will misinterpret!" "Mad, idiot!" "hey leave." "hey I want it now!" "what happened?" "Rancho's dad!" "brother, where can I find Ranchhodas?" "he's sitting over there... thank you..." "Rancho yes" "Oh sorry.. we wish to meet Ranchhodas" "I'm only Ranchhodas..tel me?" "no.." "Ranchhodas Shyamaldas Chanchad" "I'm only Ranchhodas Shyamaldas Chanchad..tell me?" "Rancho....take care of yourself!" "Ranchhodas Chanchad!" "Raju!" "yaar..i must be the first man in history who travelled from Delhi to Shimla in underwear that too ..to meet a wrong person!" "yaar..the same name..the same degree.." "And the same photo but the person is different..what's the matter!" ".." "I'm unable to understand!" "but from where did Silencer get Rancho's address?" "yes! hey..hey.." "how dare you open this..i got this from San Francisco it's hand-made biscuit.." "specially for Mr.Phunsuk Wangdu!" "Phunsuk Bangdu..." "Now who is this?" "Wangdu.." "Wangdu..'W'..'W'..." "Phunsuk Wangdu.." "do you know who that is?" "he's a great scientist...400 patents..the world wants him!" "I have been chasing him from past one year.." "And the meeting has been fixed now!" "You know..once he signs a deal with my company.." "I'll be huge!" "..huge!" "now stop praising this Wangdu and tell us from where did you get Rancho's address?" "You should be thanking Phunsuk Wangdu..it's because of him, that I found a clue see this..my secretary tracey was here last month to arrange a meeting with Phunsuk Wangdu" "Tracey couldn't get an appointment with Phunsuk but I got Rancho" "I checked Shimla's phone directory..in that the name was.." "Chanchad Ranchhodas" "Then how did his appearance change?" "He heard you are coming and got a plastic surgery done or what?" "only one man can answer this!" "I'm sorry dad." "I couldn't fulfill your last wish!" "You kept on telling..take me to Haridwar..take me to Haridwar but I was waiting for the highway's tender to be opened the tender opened over there and you closed your eyes over here!" "I'm so sorry dad." "I could not be a good son!" "what are you saying yaar?" "You have become such a great engineer, the degree's been put up on the wall" "You are a very good son!" "how dare you enter my property without my permission, huh?" "I'll put you behind bars!" "You'll go behind bars, idiot!" "we have investigated everything." "on the basis of ICE degree, you're taking these highway contracts and hydro projects this degree belongs to our friend..how did it come to you?" "it's a 150 hectares property.." "I'll blow off your heads and bury you in a corner.." "Nobody will get to know!" ".." "Get the point!" ".." "Now get lost!" "I'm taking dad's ashes and going to Haridwar..if you say, I'll even take your bones along with that!" "lift the dad!" "over there..there there" "leave my dad!" "aeeeeee.." "tell who you are..or else I shall immerse your dad's ashes over here itself handover dad to me!" "dad's ashes won't go to Ganga... they'll go into the gutter!" "aeeee...remove dad from the pot...remove from the pot!" "if you press the trigger then I'll press the flush!" "see, I'll count till three..that's it!" ".." "hey..whom are you scaring, huh?" "..shoot!" "Raju, put it in!" "one.." "hey..we'll go to hell but along with that we'll even finish your dad!" "..got it two.." "then strain-strain and remove your dad using a strainer!" "what?" "we got the wrong one..this one is empty." "empty?" "empty?" "empty..." "I'll empty it!" "no no" "I'll empty it..." "I'll empty it..." "I'm telling you." "I'll empty it noooooooo...hands up!" "come on tel..tel, who you are?" "aare, I'm Ranchhodas yaa!" "aeeeeeeeeeee" "No." "I swear on dad." "I swear on dad." "I'm telling the truth yaar!" "I'm Ranchhodas... he was Chote!" "Chote?" "he was the son of our gardener.." "everyone used to call him Chote!" "even after his mom-dad passed away...dad let him stay in the house!" "he used to do odd house-hold works.." "You know changing bulbs..getting eggs and bread..ironing.." "like he was very much interested in studies!" "he used to wear my old uniform and get into the school whichever class he liked. he would go and sit in that one!" "I used to take advantage of that.." "I used to make him do my homework also and make him write my exam papers also" "I was having a good time!" "then one day.." "Master Ji saw that a sixth standard child was solving a tenth standard problem" "Which class you are in, son?" "What's your name?" "we were caught" "Dad was a big man so Master Ji thought it's better to tell him before telling the principal!" "You've beginned this..then you only will end it!" "the whole himachal salutes in front of me.." "but as soon as I turn away....behind my back, they call me an illiterate!" "this won't happen with my son!" "he wants education...and me..just..degree let it continue as it is...make this boy an engineer" "Ranchhodas Chanchad's degree..over there..on that wall I want" "I went away to london for four years .." "And he kept studying in ICE using my name he had a deal with my dad that after getting a degree from ICE he won't meet anyone from ICE in his whole lifetime!" "he usually said..i won't go meet anyone..but one day two idiots will come searching for me then what will you do?" "he misses you both a lot!" "I'll give you the address.." "go meet him.." "but don't tel my secret to anyone yaar..please!" "which secret?" "aeeeeeeeeee sir ji.." "You got the wrong glass... big sir is in this hey what the hell is going on?" ".." "who was that gun man?" "aare it's a very complicated story and it is without subtitles You can't understand... ignore it..ignore it where are we going?" "ladakh ladakh?" "..why?" "to meet Rancho!" "is he in ladakh?" "what he doing over there?" "don't know..but this is a school's address!" "school teacher..he he he..master ji!" "I'm vice-president of rockledge corporation!" "and he.." "A for apple.." "B for Ball" "D for donkey next week, I'll be signing a multi-million dollar deal with phunshuk Wangdu!" "and he.." "A for apple.." "B for ball" "today, my respect grew even more for that Idiot Rancho!" "we all went to college only to get a degree.... if we don't have a degree, we won't have a job!" "if you don't have a job, no father will give his daughter's hand bank won't give credit card, and world won't respect us... but that idiot came to college, not for the degree but to study!" "he wasn't afraid to come last or greedy to come first!" "who was the first man to step on the moon?" "Neil Armstrong sir!" "obviously it's Neil Armstrong, we all know it..but who was the second man?" "don't waste your time, it's not important!" "nobody remembers the man who ever came second!" "after two monthes..26 companies will come to this college to offer jobs to you all!" "that means before your final exams, you'll have jobs on your hands!" "this is your last act my friends!" "put the medal on the pedal..press the accelerator go out there and make history any questions?" "yes.." "sir, suppose any student gets a job and..... he fails in the finals by 1-2 marks.." "then will the job remain or....?" "very good question is there any other person, in whose mind, the same question is arising?" "as expected" "from past four years, they have been the most consistent students of ICE!" "because consistently, they've come last in every exam if we remove these two people's brains and sell in the market, we'll get a very gud price!" "because they are unused brain.." "Never have been used!" "n to answer to their question whether they paas or fail, it's not gonna affect their jobs because they are not gonna get jobs at all!" "I guarentee it their names will be written in gold" "FARHANITRATE and PRERAJULISATION!" ".." "give them a big hand please..everybody!" "Idiot, he raped completely... collective rape you know..in front of..in front of everyone!" "God..." "I'll stop eating non-veg.." "I'll light thousands of incense sticks!" "do only one thing.." "take away VIRUS from this world!" "burn him in hell.." "make hot pakkodas of him in hot oil...." "God.." "aeee are you giving God a contract to kill?" "idiot you sit quietly, huh.." "idiot every year you sit in the centre with VIRUS and take photo while we'll be rotting in the side this year I think we'll be finished out of the photo itself!" "aee.." "do you know why I come first?" "why?" "because I'm in love with machines engineering is my passion..passion do you know what's your passion?" "hey that's my bag.." "keep quiet man!" "what are you doin, Rancho?" "hey.." "this is your passion..this..this go and post this letter.." "but what is it?" "5 years ago, he had written this letter to his favorite wild life photographer!" "Andre Isthawa ya..." "Isthawa he wanted to go to him..go to Hungary and learn work from him!" "but fearing his dad, due to Hitler Qureshi, he never posted the letter at all!" "aare..quit engineering.." "And become a wild life photographer!" "do that work which you are talented in!" "if Lata Mangeshkar's dad would have told her to become a fast bowler or Sachin Tendulkar's father would have told him to be a singer." "then think... where would they stand today?" "!" "are you understanding, what I'm sayin?" "Idiot..he loves animals but is marrying machines!" "ae baba Ranchhodas.." "my girlfriend and wife..both are engineering then why do I come last...say?" "because you are a coward... coward see this..see his hand..the fingers are less..and the rings are more one for exam..one for sister's marriage and one for job" "aare..if you fear so much from the future.." "You think you can live?" "and where will you focus on today?" "I've got weird friends yaar one fears and lives..and one idiot..dies and lives!" "heyy but you idiot..do both the things.." "You fear also and die also... ae..i don't fear!" "hey.." "listen he dies on Pia and fears to tell aaaaahahaaa... go go..get lost it's easy to give free advise dude but difficult to follow it if you dare..then go and tell Pia..tel hey from where and all you guys are connecting things.." "there's full connection baba listen to me.." "listen to me what I say is..if you go and tell Pia about what you feeling then even I'll go and tel my dad that I wanna be a photographer.." "and don't wanna be an engineer yes even I'll remove all my rings and go to give interview now say" "say..do you dare.." "baba Ranchodas rolled his tongue back....what will he say?" "come.. where... where.?" "mmm hmm.. come..." "Veeru," "Jay has come Veeru!" "see..see if there's any dog!" "hey you guys get in..if there's any danger outside.." "I'll give VIRUS alert!" "idiot.." "VIRUS..old man!" "hey shall I give background music?" "Pia?" "sshhhhh... don't shout.." "I'm Ranchhodas Chanchad listen to me for 2mins then I'll go away" "[Raju singing...... on background] [don't say anythin, don't at all say anythin!" "..]" "Pia, the 22minutes that I spent with you on the scooter those were the most beautiful 22minutes of my life!" "i can spend the rest of my life on the scooter with you wow!" "#.......everything is still.......# do you know.." "You come on scooter everyday wearing a bride's costume in my dreams!" "instead of the veil... takes off your helmet!" "and you come near me to kiss me but that kiss won't happen yaar... why?" "beacuse nose comes in between and then I wake up nose doesn't come in between, stupid" "I'm sorry..." "I thought you were Pia.." "I wish I was" "Sister, why did you interrupt in between?" "he took 4 years to say this" "Pia kiss him and tell him, nose doesn't come in between you have my permission kiss him yaar..he's so cute who is this?" "sister who are you?" "Do you know... when you were speaking... he kicked... first time!" "He... how do you know it's a he or a she?" "Dad had asked the astrologer.." "He wanted to know, is an engineer coming home or a doctor?" "Means?" "Means if it's a boy, then it's an engineer and if it's a gal, then it's a doctor oye champ.." "You stay inside itself..outside there's a lot of circus!" "and the circus's ringmaster, your granfather will spin the hunter and say run!" "life is a race..run..be an engineer but you become whatever your heart says if he scares you too much keep a hand on your heart and say:" "AAL IZ WELL!" "Hah!" "..." "He kicked!" "say again, ALL IZ WELL!" "ALL IZ WELL!" "yes..he kicked..he kicked.." "Pia say AAL IZ WELL" "ALL IZZ WELL!" "goooo...!" "you send letter to my dad!" ".... take this pee-mail freely from us pigeon..go go go.." "pigeon go go go... pigeon go go go" "Who's there?" "Who's there?" "your coming son-in-law..idiotic VIRUS..and marriage attenders!" "Rastogi!" "security..that way..that way!" "so you all have already learnt about the simple pendulum now let's get down to the advanced study about compound pendulum it's an irregular object oscillating about its own axis let me demonstrate to you what's this?" "pencil what's inside it?" "lead!" "good!" "lead is the axis to this pencil even you can be a compound pendulum if you osscilate about" "where is Raju Rastogi?" "present sir!" "hi... everybody is here good morning sir.." "where were you last night?" "sir, he was studying sir..he was studying whole night sir!" "really?" "he hasn't slept since two nights, that's why he's looking like this sir!" "what are you sayin!" "what were you studying?" "ummmm.." "induction motors sir..induction motor..he studied fully sir..induction motor!" "in that case, Mr.Raju Rastogi.." "yes sir........ can you tel me how an induction motor starts?" "brrrrm.." "brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.." "brrrrrrrrrr..... stop it!" "brrrrrrrrrrmmm brmmmmm brmm brm" "sir..rum!" "Mr.Rastogi, let's have a cup of tea in my office" "sir close the door" "do you know how to type?" "yes sir can you type a letter for me?" "definitely sir come sit sir I'm sorry sir" "please type dear sir, it is my painful duty to inform you that your son is restigated.." "no no sorry..delete it delete it..go back!" "ur son Mr.Raju Rastogi is restigated from the IMPERIAL COLLEGE OF ENGINEERING!" "dad will die sir.... please type sir, please sir my decision is final and irrevokable!" "he's living only in a hope that he could see me becoming an engineer sir!" "you could've thought of this before you pissed in front of my doors... sir give me one more chance sir, please... just one chance sir please sir" "ok..remove your name from the letter and put Ranchodas Chanchad's name!" "I know he was with you last night!" "be my witness and I won't remove you from the college" "you have 7.5 minutes with you..to think" "#......we won't let you go .......# #.......we shall not let you leave.......#" "#.......even if God might summon you.......# #.....but we are not the one who fear him.....# #.....we are standing here in this ground with resolve.....#" "#.....take out our eyes from our pal....# #...." "No matter how hard you try.....# #....we're not gonna let you leave lik this.....# #......we won't let you go .......# #.......we shall not let you leave.......#" "Rancho, look at that monitor" "Raju!" "the body is paralyzed due to the shock but the mind is alert he can see us and hear us!" "please aunty, don't cry in front of him!" "talk to him normally.. motivate him.. crack jokes.. keep him happy oye Raju, we have a good news yaar dad is become proper yaar.... that new medicine worked!" "it's Rastogi family's tradition that.." "if one man gets up... the other man will lie down!" "C'mon, c'mon... get-up now your dad is asking for Pia's scooter?" "what do you say?" "... shall I give it?" "won't he bang it?" "hey Raju, Farhan wants to tell you something on the webcam.." "live from the hostel!" "see this.." "Virus has cancelled your suspension..problem solved c'mon...wake up at least now!" "everything is solved... oye..are you listening....hey" "Rastogi!" "see this..mom bought a new saree.." "New saree brand new it costs 2000 bucks son... see at least get up now... idiot not one..she bought ten sarees..ten!" "see oye Raju" "Raju..tel me, how do I look?" "hey..kammo have you heard about kammo?" "aare, kammo's marriage has been fixed and that too..without any dowry!" "hey..bridegroom..the bridegroom doesn't want maruti 800 doesn't want anything..wants kammo..only kammo.." "huh..." "And do you know who's the bridegroom?" "yes who's the bridegroom?" "guess it" "You know him very well huh... he loves animals a lot huh?" "!" "and ..and he's gonna be a wild life photographer!" "hey keep quiet!" "..keep quiet!" "didn't flash?" "aare, it's our Farhan yaar!" "as if our Farhan will take dowry from you ppl!" "aare, our Farhan will marry your sister.." "Farhan!" "and that too..free..free..free hey..hey.." "hey..hey Raju" "Raju if we would have given 1 kilo lady's finger and 1/2 kilo paneer freely to that idiot even then he would get up what was the need to sacrifice me?" "well done yaar..well done well done everything is fixed.." "Your sister's marriage is fixed" "Farhan will marry..ok done!" "Rancho!" ".." "idiots..how much will you lie?" "You are saved..idiot!" "did you call for a taxi?" "I have called for it,... it's waiting thank you... why?" "I have to go 4 a job interview" "Oh..so you gonna go with me?" "no.." "I'll drop you home and I'll go for the job interview!" "Idiot...why will I go home?" "did you forget?" ".." "we had promised something to this idiot!" "give..give me your tie!" "why?" "give it..i don't think after reading this, you'll be able to go for the interview!" "what is this?" "it's a letter" "It came for you." "From hungary!" "it's some photographer.." "Andre Isthawan!" "idiots.." "You posted my letter?" "he liked your photos very much..he's become crazy!" "he wants to make you his assistant!" "He has called you to work in the Brazilian rainforest for one year!" "He's saying he'll even give you salary!" "Dad won't oblige!" "Go to him." "And make him understand lovingly." "Don't fear today Farhan." "Otherwise after 50yrs when you'll be old and fallen in the hospital... and be waiting to die" "You'll think then. letter was in the hand. taxi was at the gate." "if I had dared a little bit. life would have been something else!" "what do you think, will he like it?" "what was the need to get such an expensive one!" "today, son is getting a job now the days to put our head up and roam wid pride are arriving and you are being stingy!" "huh?" "aare Farhan?" "Farhan, today was your interview, right?" "I didn't go i don't wanna be an engineer dad!" "what happened?" "You had an an accident?" "sir..." "Umm... that building in front sir." "I had jumped from its third floor sir!" "why?" "because I was restigated!" "why?" "sir I had pissed on director's door when I was in a drunken state... that devil Rancho is still playing with your brain?" "I can't understand engineering...even if I'll be..." "I'll be a very bad engineer dad!" "Rancho tells a very simple thing." "whatever you enjoy doing, make that your profession!" "then work won't seem work but a game!" "aare..how much will you earn in that jungle?" "dad, stipend isn't too much but I'll get to learn a lot!" "after 5 years, when you'll see your friends buying a car then you'll curse yourself!" "I'll be frustrated being an engineer, then I'll curse you throughout my life!" "Dad, it's better I curse myself, right?" "aare..people will laugh!" "they'll say that you came till final year and had quit!" "That Kapoor sir told me that you're lucky that your son is studying in ICE!" "what will he think?" "Kapoor sir didn't get AC fixed in my room!" "making me sleep comfortably...he himself didn't sleep in heat!" "making me sit on the shoulders..." "Kapoor sir didn't take me around the zoo!" "you did all that dad!" "what you think, makes a difference!" "what Kapoor sir thinks, it doesn't make a difference to me!" "aare..." "I don't even know his first name!" "have you watched a film and come..." "are you performing drama?" "stop it now. poor guy is tensed!" "God forbid, if he commits something like Raju!" "then the discussion is only over!" "don't say anything to son or else he'll jump from the terrace!" "no dad..." "I won't commit suicide." "I promise!" "That Rancho, whom you call a devil." "he forcibly made me put yours and mom's photo in this!" "he started saying that....promise me....that whenever such stupid thoughts come to your mind!" "see this photo and think what will happen to this smile when they see your dead body!" "dad, I wanna convince you." "but not by hanging this suicide's sword on your head!" "what will happen.... huh?" "If I'd be a photographer... then I'll earn less, right?" "Home will be small, car will be small!" "But dad, I'll be happy..." "I will be really happy!" "Whatever I do for you." "I'll do it from my heart!" "Till today..." "I have listened to whatever you said, today... just once..." "let me listen to my heart!" "Please dad!" "Dad..." "Don't go..." "Please!" "Return this one.." "Son, how much will your professional camera cost?" "Will we get it against this laptop?" "If it costs more money, then ask me son" "Go..." "Go son..." "Live your life" "Your marks are consistenly poor... any particular reason?" "Due to fear..." "I was a bright student since childhood parents thought that it will abolish our poverty!" "I started to fear!" "when I came here.." "I saw that there's a race,.. if you don't come first, no one will recognize you" "I started to fear even more!" "fear is not good for grade, sir!" "I started wearing more rings... praying more not only praying..." "I started begging to God" "Give me this, give me that!" "16 bones broke, I got two months to think..then I understood!" "sir, today I haven't told God... that get me this job" "I just folded my hands." "And said thank you for this life" "If you guys." "If you guys even reject me today, then I don't have any regrets" "Because I believe.." "I'll somehow do something worthy with my life sir!" "see..this very much frank behaviour of yours is not good for our company!" "we need a diplomatic person to handle the clients and you are way too straight forward!" "but..if you assure us that you can control this attitude of yours.." "then..something can happen!" "sure after breaking both the limbs, I learnt to stand on my feet sir, with great difficulty, I got this attitude in me!" "..it can't happen sir!" "you keep your job, I'll keep my attitude" "I'm sorry..don't mind sir!" "stop" "I've been recruiting from the past 25years.. conducted a lot of interviews to get the job.. people find yes in our yes itself!" "from where have you come yaar?" "Sir..." "I?" "how much salary will you take brother?" "let's discuss" "thank you sir." "thank you" "Oh Emperor... you're great" "accept out gift..." "Govind...!" "sir you only said if they get a job, remove your moustache... huh, what have you done?" "he eh ehehehheehheeeehhe" "I'm feeling like someone undressed me humiliated me...." "I won't let you conquer, Rastogi you gonna get a job only when you pass in final exams, but this time I'm gonna set the paper for exam... dad that's not fair" "everything is fair in love and war... and this is world war 3" "Rastogi you're gone this time... hehe heheheee what are you doing here?" "easy easy... you're drunk?" "ya yaar, had to take two, four... two... four?" "two or four?" "I was in need of dareness... for what?" "to steal this... what is this?" "a duplicate key of VIRUS's office sshh ssshh sshhhs questions papers are in the red sealed envelope... dad has set by himself... to fail Raju in exam." "take it out... mad or what?" "this is cheating yaar... no.." "everything is fair in love and war eeheh eheheh ok... just tell me one thing," "do you really feel... nose comes in between if wanted to kiss?" "hmmm... ey have this dhokla... hold this," "you Gujrati people are too cute yaar, but why does your food sound so dangerous?" "Dhokla, phaphda, handhwa, thepla, kakkrah" "It seems as though they are some missiles!" "come... come on" "Tonight Bush dropped two dhoklas... 400 killed, 200 injured!" "come on.." "aare" "I can bear with khakrah, phaphda but this name of yours" "Ranchhodas Shyamaldas Chanchad!" "yack!" "I won't change my surname after marriage, huh?" "Pia, we can't get married" "why?" "do you love someone?" "no are you gay?" "no then why don't you propose me?" "are you impotent?" "then prove it..prove it" "Pia.." "I'm not.." "hey stop stop stop stop!" "aare, what happened?" "aare, we haven't informed Pia at all!" "Oh stop now..my bladders are bursting!" "Oh shut up yaar!" "are you in touch with her?" "no yaar but I have her landline no." "then dial it, I'll stop.." "ya..stop stop stop" "hello!" "no place to piss in this country?" "hello..ya..is Pia there?" "she's not there sir ok..where will she be availiable?" "..in the hospital?" "Sir, why would she go to hospital today?" "It's her marriage today!" "she's gone to manali!" "Pia marriage is over!" "it's not yet over..see, it's a 6 hour's way..if we speed up, then we'll surely reach before the marriage vows!" "what do you say?" "now if you have already thought about it partner, then take a u-turn!" "ae, no u-turn...straight to Ladakh...we'll meet Rancho and come back..." "Friday, I have a meeting with Phunsukh Wangdu" "If I miss it, you know what will happen!" "The Japanese will get in." "They are offering him a first name in the company" "Phunshuk and Fujiashi." "Profit hearings are." "Pia weds Suhas!" "and thanks for the suit, huh!" "yaar..." "Virus will suffer a heart attack hello, hello whenever his daughters are getting married, we come off to ruin it!" "ok listen." "I'll handle Pia. you pull out the price-tag!" "Farhan!" "we found Rancho, Pia!" "Is it for 107?" "Yes sir!" "Give it here." "How much time do you take yaar?" "Sorry sir..." "Come on... go" "house-keeping sir!" "come in!" "more..more..amore quick quick iron my sherwani!" "more..more..amore aare, we found Rancho..still, will you marry this donkey?" "you're mad, Farhan!" "don't fool yourself Pia!" "you love Rancho even today.. and eating these dhoklas remembering him!" "more..more..amore" "he's a dog's tail..put it inside a pipe for 12years.. when you remove it..it'll still remain bent!" "Shut up Farhan." "Suhas is the changed man!" "now he never talks about brands and prices!" "My 1.5lakh worth sherwani!" "why do you people eat chutney?" "sir I'll do something sir!" "what...what will you do?" "sir...sir...we get such shirts and sherwanis everyday in our laundry sir!" "I'll clean it within 2minutes sir!" "sir..one minute sir!" "get it soon!" "but it's too late now, Farhan!" "Pia." "I'm Raju." "Don't shout, people will kill me" "where is Suhas?" "aare, he had come from house-keeping. he took away the sherwani!" "Go inside." "And send Suhas" "The hymns are going on Pia." "If I get up and go then all will be furious yaar!" "yes Farhan, tell me car is ready at the gate" "I'm telling..take Pia and run!" "aare don't move yaar sir?" "sherwani?" "you are here?" "yes whose taking the vows over there?" "vows?" "if the vows get over..then our marriage will be over.." "I'm already married Pia.." "let's go!" "there are so many people over here..all of them will laugh!" "aare, because people laugh... so will you suicide?" "aare.." "Rastogi?" "Pia.. people will gossip for two days and forget it!" "but today if you do this marriage..you never forget that car was at the gate!" "we had come to take you to Rancho..but only because you feared from people you got married to this donkey!" "house keeping?" "yaar Pia..there is a small..minor tension." "what?" "we don't know if Rancho's married or not?" "what!" "aare, I wouldn't have happened yaar. it wouldn't have happened!" "and if it would've happened?" "then we'll drop you back!" "aare, don't take tension. have this biscuit hand-made biscuit from San Francisco" "Idiot,." "from where did he come?" "ignore it..ignore it.." "you eat the biscuits..eat.." "it's very good" "AAL IZ WELL..." "AAL IZ WELL!" "Till yesterday I was a noble citizen of this country but in the last 24hours." "I had got an emergency landing of a plane almost immersed Shyamalda's soul in the gutter and kidnapped a bride from her wedding all for that idiot Rancho but even that idiot gave out his heart for his friends he had entered Ravan's territory, to steal a question paper for Raju" "search for a red sealed envelope ok come... he was very afraid..that if Raju failed, he'll again go and do a high-jump!" "but even we were very principled robbers!" "we had sweared that we'll steal the paper oly for Raju...we won't even see it ourselves!" "aare yaar, where has he hidden it?" "aare yaar, searching like this, it'll be good morning" "Rancho, ask Pia" "where are you, since then I'm calling you?" "Pia, your phone give it to me, one minute Pia..." "Pia" "Jiju..when we say AAL IZ WELL..it kicks!" "it kicked you heard?" "Pia, your phone" "we got it.." "Rancho.." "hello?" "aare at least call me sometimes!" "make its copy..make its xerox copy..quick!" "take it" "keep it wherever we got it from... carefully!" "oye where had you been?" "huh?" "huh?" "take this... what is it?" "enjoy... question paper..." "VIRUS's had set by himself to make you fail in exam.... weird friends I've got... teaching how to live straight forward first.... then making me do things that are odd... no..today.." "if I pass, it'll be on my own ability!" "otherwise it's okay if I fail!" "Idiot!" "idiot won my heart!" "My heart said I'll make this idiot my brother-in-law um.. um... then I controlled my emotion!" "go..go.." "no sir no sir please.." "you had come to change the system!" "You'll piss on my door bloody rascals sorry sir" "you are restigated, if you aren't gone by morning." "I'll call the police" "I'll call the police rascals..rascals all of you!" "how did he get my office's key?" "I gave him the keys dad" "I wish I had given it to my brother he would have been alive today.." "stop it Pia what do you think?" "..brother, fell off the train and died?" "shut up Pia you decided that he'll be an engineer..... did you ever ask him, what he wanted to be?" "how much you pressurised brother, dad.." "he thought it's easier to die than to give an entrance exam!" "what is she saying?" "dad, you go into the room!" "you get into your room!" "Pia stop it..what are you doing Pia?" ".." "I'm telling you right.." "brother wanted to study literature..he wanted to be a writer but he couldn't write anything more than this suicide note!" "Pia, hide that letter..please!" "till when will I hide it sister?" "once only once if you would have told him if you can do engineering then quit it!" "do whatever you like!" "then today brother would have been alive, dad!" "he cannot suicide you're right dad, it wasn't a suicide... it was a murder!" "in many areas..the roads are immersed in water..their is total traffic jam!" "Dad.." "dad!" ".." "Mona.... aare, I told you to go back right?" "then why are you coming behind us?" "why..is this your mom's road?" "please help..we are desperate here!" "is there only one ambulance in the city?" "get an ambulance from some other hospital!" "the whole city is immersed in water, sir we can't do anythin!" "no.." "Pia..that.." "hey Mona..what happened?" "Rancho.." "Pia!" "Rancho, it's impossible to reach over here.... so do as I say!" "you guys are not understanding!" "..get water bags..drive fast!" ".." "You're not underst....... they disconnected!" "Monaa!" "Monaa!" "be careful..be careful turn on the light..turn on the light!" "table..table..table-tennis table" "Raju, switch on the webcam!" "yaa" "ya Pia.." "hello Raju..where is sister?" "...show me!" "ya..hold on hold on don't worry.. hold on see this Pia sister, everything will be alright!" "I'm near you..ok?" "Pia I'm dying." "Rancho, when there were no hospitals and doctors in this world even then babies were born... you guys will carry on sister's delivery aaaaa" "aal iz well.. aal iz well.." "how dare you...?" "what are you guys doing?" "dad, don't come in between..please stay out of this ok!" "Farhan, you go get towels and scissors...." "Millimeter, get cloth drying clip and hot water...." "Rancho you cover sister... sister.... push" "push.... keep quiet.." "I'm unable to push" "Rancho, see if crowning is happening?" "crowning means?" "go get that diagram" "Rancho, see if the head is coming out come on Rancho..quickly" "Gooooooo" "No." "No crowning." "It's not coming." "No sister.. please push" "Mona.." "Mona she's tired Pia.." "wake her up if she doesn't push, then it'll be a big problem vacuum cup has to be put, Pia from where will they get a vacuum cup over there... what is a vacuum cup?" "..how does it look?" "..what do they do with it?" "I'll show u if the mother gets tired and is unable to push then this cup is put on the baby's head suction pump creates vacuum and this cup sticks on the baby's head then the baby is pulled out" "i can make this..i can make it how?" "vacuum cleaner sir.." "vacuum cleaner?" ".." "yes sir..vacuum cleaner but vacuum cleaner's pressure is too much Rancho" "I'll control the pressure is there a vacuum cleaner over there?" "it's there in my office" "Farhan go soon and get it from sir's office take the key" "what happened?" "what happened?" "ya Pia hello Raju what happened?" "the light is gone Pia" "Oh God!" "Now how will the vacuum cleaner work" "Farhan, you get the vacuum cleaner and I shall get the light.." "how?" "Millimeter..get Virus out..fast come on come Virus..get out..get out aare not this Virus yaar.. my Virus, the inverter that I had made that?" "go get that soon" "Oh ok, that one..." "I understood!" "Raju..wake everyone in the hostel and tell them that we want car battery, wires, tool kit and vaccuum gauge.. come on" "come out..there's an emergency in the common room" "where is Rancho?" "sir sir sir..here sir" "and the wires" "Raju.. turn off all switches and connect this inverter to main... take this" "Rancho, vacuum cleaner..." "Farhan.... that camera cleaning thing..what do you call it?" "plower..plower..go and get it soon" "Rancho, take this plower pull the vaccuum and put it on the pipe..over here!" "Rancho..it's done!" "is every swiches off?" "now turn on only TT table's and computer's light!" "Raju, turn on the computer..fast!" "help me..connect this..put it in this! love you Rancho" "Farhan..on it yes" "Pia, how much must the suction be?" "not more than 0.5 Rancho" "Farhan..0.5 cover up yes" "0.5 ok delivery using vacuum cleaner..i haven't seen this in 20 yrs of my career!" "Farhan..off it.." "yeah" "Raju, get on the table..see me push the baby down like this.." "like this" "Farhan, turn it on.." "come on sister....push.." "You can do it! come on Mona.." "Mona push it's coming..it's coming come on sister....you can do it" "Farhan..turn it off.." "ya ya." "I turned it off" "put two clips..and cut the umbical chord" "Farhan, get two clips..fast!" "put it on the umbical chord and get scissors careful careful get the towel..towel" "Pia.." "Pia,why isn't it cryin?" "huh?" ".." "hey hey champ" "Rancho rub is back hey champ" "no.." "Nothing is happening.." "blow air into its mouth.." "come on.." "come on champ" "nothing is happening" "Quiet Mona, quiet say all iz well.. say aal iz well" "it kicked what!" "it kicked say aal iz well.. all iz well all iz well all iz well all iz well all iz well all iz well all iz well" "yeah!" "at that time if VIRUS would have said that his grandson would have been an engineer..." "I would have raped that idiot!" "but when that idiot opened his mouth, then a miracle happened!" "solid you kick.. will you become a footballer or what?" "become..become whatever your heart says" "stop....where are you going?" ".." "I'm not finished with you, on the first day of college, you had asked me a question....remember?" "that why don't they use a pencil in the space." "if the tip of the pencil breaks in the space, then it will be revolving under the action of gravity it can get into someone's eyes, it can get into someone's nose it can get into the instrument panel." "you were wrong... you were wrong you cannot be right all the time!" "you understand?" "yes sir this was a very important invention... you understand?" "yes sir my director had told me.... when any extraordinary student comes... go go go... go study..." "pass in the exams and go away from here... and now student of the year.." "Ranchhodas Shyamaldas Chanchad" "sir..one photo sir!" "i wanted to capture all these memories in my camera and take it with me!" "on that day, everyone were hugging each other, getting emotional and making promises that we'll stay in touch, we'll surely meet up once in a year!" "who knew that we were seeing Rancho for the last time?" "yaar, untie him!" "I'll sue you all in american court!" "Raju." "this kinda school... only can be made by that idiot Rancho!" "but where is he?" "see there.." "go in creatures... go don't piss over here... you want a beating, huh?" "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ha ha ha.." "we got him.... that idiot is some where around.. come on" "brother, where will we find Ranchhodas?" "is his name Ranchhodas!" "Rancho" "Chote.." "Chote.." "Chote aare, whats his name ultimately?" "aare, cool down.... cool down come with me.." "where.. where is Rancho?" "Rancho.." "Rancho" "Farhan, do you know.....he has read every book written by u!" "..see this" "Raju.... he reads your blogs everyday!" "he tells the children about your research very proudly!" "do you remember your helmet Pia sister?" "it was stolen right?" "who are you?" ".. and how do you remember all our names?" "didn't you recognize me?" "no how will you recogzine.. now that millimeter has become centimeter!" "oye oye oye..idiot..what centimeter?" "you have become kilometer!" "but what are you doing over here?" "for the first time, I got a letter on my name.." "I found a train ticket from that it was written inside that if you wanna study then board the train!" "and I boarded it.." "idiot Rancho.." "where is that idiot?" "Furjee.. take this and go!" "you come in my dreams everyday on a scooter wearing a bride's costume !" "instead of the veil.. you take off your helmet!" "and you come near me to kiss me!" "aaaaaaah..ouch!" "couldn't you say and go?" "ummmm.." "No.." "ummmm...sorry did you get married?" "what?" "..what?" ".." "no... you?" "almost, idiot!" "then?" "then what?" "do you love someone?" "hmm.." "ya" "who?" "you..!" "did you see, the nose doesn't come in between, stupid!" "yes, that's right!" "idiot Rancho!" "hi, Farhan!" "aare keep your hi to yourself!" "aare listen to me!" "no, you listen to me aare..you listen to me.." "listen to me, no,you listen to me, I'll explain everything hey Raju idiot!" "look here... aeee.idiot" "hit him..hit him two-three from my side as well because of you, what all I had to become..you know?" "this idiot got glasses!" "come.. getup idiot.. getup" "ha ha eh ehhe hehhhee hey idiot!" "having fun idiots?" "hey.. hi Chatur" "Ranchhodas Chanchad....." "Namaste masterji where have you reached?" "..you have become a teacher in the village, eh?" "A for apple.." "B for ball we boarded the bus together right but your train went away in reverse straight to primary teacher from engineering ha ha ha ha whats the salary Chanchad?" "..tell me.." "Rs 5000, huh?" "for me, they are like 100 $ my son's pocket money is more than your salary hey stop this non-sense he used to do non-sense.. he wanted to change the education system he wanted to change the world" "now he changes children's diaper over here!" "will you break his teeth or shall I do it?" "..." "Idiot" "Hey, let it be!" "Do you remember?" "I told you." "One day you'll cry and I'll laugh" "Hehehe hahhaa" "Sign over here." "Accept it." "That you lost and I won!" "The declaration of defeat." "Unbelivable yaar." "Chatur, unbelivable" "Hey, that is Virus's pen" "How did you get it?" "You stole it?" "Umm.." "Now what shall I say yaar?" "This is for winners, not losers" "No problem." "If you have any difficulty in school and need a donation" "Do call my assistant, eh!" "Ha ha ehe he e" "A for apple." "B for ball" "He hasn't changed at all yaar yaar..ignore it,..ignore it!" "leave him yaar..he'll keep saying anything leave it..the good news is your name is not Ranchhodas Chanchad imagine.... after marriage I would be Pia Chanchad!" "yack by the way, whats your real name?" "Phunshuk Wangdu" "Wangdu?" "Pia Wangdu?" "no.. means you are a scientist?" "that means you have 400 patents in your name?" "i won't change my surname after marriage means you are Chatur's Wangdu?" "are the japanese looking for you?" "i don't like Wangdu!" "I think so... yaar tell me one thing.. are you a scientist or a teacher?" "I'm a scientist but I also teach children means you are the phunshuk Wangdu?" "yes man..yes oye Silencer.. hey Chatur comeback!" "stop stop stop take van, huh?" "ehhehe hehe he won't stop that way!" ".." "I'll stop him!" "Mr.Wangdu.." "I can't believe you called!" "I'm sorry Mr.Chatur but I can't sign a deal with your company!" "what sir, what happened sir?" "aare how shall I sign yaar.. you took away my pen!" "he heh ehehe what pen sir?" ".." "I did'nt get you the one that's in your hand.." "Virus's pen!" "Virus's pen?" "Mr.Wangdu?" "ya tell me Chatur!" "A for Apple.." "B for Ball...." "L for lucky!" "ehhe ehhee yaar, he has been raped!" "eh ehhehee" "you got me.." "you got me Rancho" "I mean Mr.Wangdu. Totally flowd me." "Good one" "I hope our personal problems are not gonna affect our deal.... hey Chatur..over here..here" "I was just joking yaar.." "I knew it from within that you'll do something in life!" "no.. you're lying?" "no no no no.." "I'm telling you.." "I swear" "Rancho 100.." "Chatur zero you win, I lose.. you don't believe me aare yaar" "Oh Emperor, you are great.. accept the gift" "I'll give you a free advice Mr.Wangdu... run!" "run run... hey Rancho.." "I'll lose my job yaar..." "I have small-small kids baba Ranchhodas used to say rightly kids.... be self-efficeient.. self-efficient then success will come behind you"