"Asano Tadanobu" "Nagasaku Hiromi" "Based on a novel by Kamoshida Yutaka" "Written and directed by Higashi Yoichi" "What's your name?" " Sakura." " Sakura!" "Doesn't she look like someone?" "Some celebrity?" "Here's to us!" "Cheers!" "WANDERING HOME" "That guy's staring at me." "He sure is." "Why?" "A stalker?" "Here you go." "Food's here!" "That guy again?" "Are you OK, sir?" "Are you OK?" "I'll help you up." "Papa!" "Papa!" "Don't sleep here, Papa." "Come on, get up!" "One, two..." "There." "One, two..." "There we go." "Are you OK?" "I'll bring you water." "Sorry, I'm all right" "Be sure you eat dinner." "Yeah." "No more booze after today." "This week I'll see my kids sober." "I'm sure." "It'll all work out- Go ahead and drink." "You'll be fine." "No problem" "Ma..." "You rammed into me, you jerk!" "Asshole!" "Lots of blood in the toilet." "He never spit up this much blood before." "Bring the stretcher." "He uses the Ishidate Clinic." "Please take him there." "Give them a call." "Excuse me." "Ah, Yuki." "I'm sorry to bother you." "Not at all." "I'm sorry, I did it again." "It's OK, you're not dead yet." "Get up slowly, and lie down here." "Here." "I'm OK." "Take your time." "We'll go to the ambulance." "One, two, three." "Hurry on home to the kids." "It's OK, they understand." "I'll call you later." "Excuse me." "It's Mama." "He's OK." "They took him to the clinic." "He'll be in the hospital." "Yeah, let's visit him." "Well, let me see..." "I'll be home in..." "5 minutes, 23 seconds." "Bye-bye." " Are you OK?" " Yeah." " Are you in pain?" " No." "OK, start a blood transfusion." "Maximum flow." "OK, I'll start the transfusion." "Excuse me." "The endoscope is ready." "Back again?" "Hello, doctor." "OK, open your mouth." "This is the mouthpiece." "I'll tape it in place." "I'll insert the camera." "Relax your throat, please." "Prepare the EVL." "I'll use the endoscope to stop the bleeding." "Bring his mother." "Yes"" "Mother..." "Ma..." "You woke up?" "Is it morning, or evening?" "Which do you think?" "How long did I sleep?" "You've been asleep for 3 days." "3 days?" "Yuki came 2 days ago." "She said you looked pale and left again." "She'll bring the kids next time..." "Ah, that's today." "Oh, don't do that!" "What is it?" "I want to get up, help me." "You mustn't." "You need bed rest, they said." "Shall I raise the bed a bit?" "I have no strength at all." "Of course not." "Do you know what the doctor told me?" "What?" "You're in critical condition, anything could happen." "How many times have I spit blood?" "9 times." "Wait, you did once in Okinawa, right?" "10 times." "That many." "If you want to die that badly, just go off and die by yourself." "Don't involve your family." "When I want to die, I'll do that." "Wait, Hiroshi!" "Wait!" "Papa's in here, Mama!" "Oh, Grandma!" "Grandma!" "Oh, you came!" "What are you doing here, Papa?" "It was serious, this time." "I spit up a lot of blood." "His liver function test showed a Gamma GTP of 1800." "It's amazing he's alive." "Someday, you're going to fall over dead." "I'm going down to the kiosk." "See you later." "Papa, isn't this pretty?" "That's cute, thank you." "Hiroshi." "What?" "Come here a sec." "What're you up to?" "See this, it's your papa's pee." "Wow!" "It'll spill!" "Let's make it run back." "Watch out!" "Careful!" "That was close." "OK, let it flow back." "Let me try." "OK." "Here goes, one... two..." "Hey, now, cut that out!" "We're punishing the bad, bad papa." "Lay off!" "OK, one more time..." "One... two..." "It'll flow back in me." "OK, stop, enough." "Now put it back." "So..." "What're we to do?" "I'm gonna quit drinking." "You're gonna quit?" "Really, really quit." "Go to a rehab hospital?" "I'll go, and take the medication." "You mean, anti-alcohol drugs?" "Think you can?" "Yeah, I can do that." "If you drink while you're taking them, you feel terrible." "That's why they work." "OK, when you get out of here, I'll introduce you to a doctor I know." "You should go see him." "OK, give your father a bye-bye kiss." "Bye-bye." "I'm a man, and I don't kiss men." " Come here." " No." " How come?" " I won't." "Wait outside a minute." "OK." "See you." "Thanks." "So, you'll work at it, after you get out, you'll quit drinking." "Sorry, really." "You damn fool." "It's your own fault." "See you." "Thanks." "I'm sorry, please wait a bit longer." "I'll break for lunch soon." "Well, in any case, it's not an easy disease to cure." "I don't really understand, but is it possible to pinpoint this or that cause of the disease?" "Some alcohol-dependent patients will say a trauma triggered it, but it's not a simple thing to determine." "He says that when he was a photojournalist, he saw things close to Hell in Cambodia and other places." "But... who suffers more, one who sees Hell, or those who live there?" "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that." "His father was also alcohol dependent." "Well, the environment is a factor." "A sense of failure or inferiority may also contribute." "Anyway, please meet with him." "Of course, I'll be glad to." "The distinctive thing about this disease is, unlike other diseases, no one in the world has any real sympathy." "Even doctors, sometimes." "I know." "Everyone thinks, it serves you right." "The patient and the family need to be prepared for this." "Right." "I've been getting ready for that." "It may be impolite to ask..." "Go ahead." "Not as a doctor, it's a personal question... but you divorced him, Mr. Tsukahara." "Yes"" "What was the reason for the divorce?" "When I was young..." "I was always afraid to walk alone, in the evening." "I wanted someone to hold my hand." "But, just being married didn't actually mean" "I wasn't walking alone." "And I had to protect the children..." "So why is it you're so concerned about this man you've divorced?" "There's no way around it." "The kids love their father, and... it's hard to hate someone you once loved." "I see." "Someone you once loved..." "Shut up, you bitch!" "Don't shout." "The kids will wake up"" "I'll wake 'em up, wake 'em and tell 'em," ""You're not my kids!"" "Right, bitch?" ""Get out of my house!"" "That, again?" "What?" "Can you hear yourself?" "What?" "You did it!" "You slept with Ota, you bitch!" "I did not!" "Not with that jerk." ""That jerk?" My best friend's a "jerk"?" "You said it first." "What?" ""Your best friend fucked your wife!"" "Whose "best friend"?" "Stop right there!" "You said it"" "You said you slept with him." "You said you fucked him." "You did fuck him, you bitch!" "You come easy, don't you?" "How many times did you come?" "How many times did he make you come, huh?" "How many times did you blow him, with this mouth of yours?" "How loud did you scream?" "You loved every minute of it!" "What's this crap, here?" "Don't!" "You're full of shit, bitch!" "Kaoru, you shouldn't be out here." "We're home!" "Welcome back!" "We're home!" "Hi, there!" "Sorry to ask you to do that, Asami." "Give me a raise, a babysitting fee." "I'll consider it." "We need to hurry." "OK." "Our snack?" "The usual place." "Got it." "Let's go." "Do this one." "There's just one thing I have to say to you." "You've got two children, and you need to think long and hard about them." "Aside from that," "I don't care, do whatever you please." "The old man didn't think of the kids, did he?" "Sorry"" "You suffered most of all." "Your wife... that is, your ex-wife..." "I've been a fan of hers for many years." "I have all her books." "I went to her book-signings, and that's where we met." "She came by the other day and told me about you." "It's hard, but if you're determined, you can get sober." "You can be treated as an outpatient at our clinic, or you can choose to enter a psychiatric hospital, in which case, I'll be glad to recommend one." "I've got work to do, so I can't be in a hospital." "I'd like to be an outpatient here." "You write books, don't you?" "I saw one, Cambodian Journal." "Well, then, to get started..." "The anti-alcohol drug, Nocbin." "I'll prescribe the powdered form." "If you drink after taking this, you'll feel terrible." "To help you sleep, I'll prescribe sleeping pills, all right?" "Yes, thank you." "And we'll see how it goes." "Come see me again, a week from today." "Thank you." "Your thumb, no, your finger..." "Your finger, through here..." "No, that's wrong!" "I give up!" "Papa?" "Will you eat dinner with us tonight?" "I'd sure like to, but I have to work." "Next Sunday." "Is she OK?" "She's fine." "That girl never shows her tears." "OK, this is as far as I go." "See you." "See you." "See you, bye-bye." "Bye-bye." "See you, take care." "Here we go..." "Say good-bye again?" "One... two..." "Bye-bye." "OK, let's go." "Lonely." ""Sabishii." If you just say the vowels..." ""A-i-i-i."" "Sad." ""Kanashii."" "That's "a-a-i-i."" ""A-a-i-i."" ""Aa, ii."" "Ah, ii?" "Ah, that's good." "Here you go, tuna." "Red bream and sea urchin, please." "Some pickles." "Thanks." "Nara pickles..." "Pickled in sake lees..." "But it's not sake, right?" "Thank you!" "Nah, that's dicey." "Stay away from vodka." "No non-alcoholic beer?" "Well, it's just beer." "No problem, just this little." "20 percent..." "No big difference." "Just this little, no problem." "OK, time to go home." "Oh, shit." "Nara pickles..." "You aren't gonna talk?" "No sermon, or anything..." "What's this bag?" "This is a hospital." "You're being admitted." "Dad." "I've done it." "I didn't want to be like you, so why'd it come to that?" "Mom," "Yuki," "Hiroshi," "Kaoru, all of you, I'm sorry." "I won't drink anymore." "I won't...drink again." "Did you hear?" "He's gone in the hospital." "For drinking?" "He's alcoholic." "We say "alcohol-dependent" now." "His father was, too." "What'll happen with the children?" "I wonder." "Think of his wife." "I bet he was violent with her." "That's scary." "Last night, my guy said, "Let's get married."" "What?" "They're fools, men." "Why?" "No, forget it." "It's nothing." "Why don't you?" "Marry." "Are you awake?" "It's dinnertime." "Can you walk?" "How long did I sleep?" "You slept a day and half." "Shall we go?" "Take your time." "Here." "Excuse me." "You'll sit here tonight." "The menu is different for each patient." "Be sure you chew well." " Mr. Tsukahara." " Yes." "Here it is." "Here you go." "Here you are, Mr. Ito." "This is hot, so please be careful." "Chew carefully, Mr. Yamauchi." "Are you OK, can you carry that?" "Why is this all I get?" "!" "Is this all?" "It's the doctor's orders." "Your stomach is in pretty bad shape." "Don't give me such a dirty look." "Ms. Toyama." "Good morning." "Did you have breakfast?" "The boiled turnips?" "I'll tell you..." "Every day a different word." "Depends on her mood that day." "Her husband's a famous songwriter." "Excuse me." "There are a lot of women here." "This is the alcohol ward, right?" "Didn't they explain, in Admissions?" "You're in the psychiatric ward, until an alcohol room opens up." "Oh, I see." "These numbers are awful." "Awful, even for alcohol patients." "It's surprising you're alive." "That bad, huh?" "You've ruptured veins in your esophagus many times." "How much did you drink?" "Well, I'd drink from morning till night, kind of like a marathon." "You'd have to, to end up in a state like this." "Anyway, let's do some tests." "An EEG, an MRI, a CT scan, and an endoscopic exam." "Curry!" "Curry for lunch!" "Is it pork?" "No, that smells like beef." "Either way, it's curry!" "All right!" "Curry!" "...so that's the picture, we'll take it from there." "Thank you." "Hey!" "I don't get curry?" "Yes, doctor's orders." "Are you picking a fight?" "I'll be glad to oblige." "No!" "How is the food?" "Are you eating it all?" "All of it?" "One bowl of porridge isn't enough." "I'm famished." "That's a good sign." "It means you're getting better." "So let me eat curry!" "What is it?" "Huh?" "Did I say something?" "Well, you shouted suddenly." "I'm sorry, I was daydreaming." "A daydream." "Well, you seem to have recovered your strength." "Yeah, I'm in good shape." "Did something upset you at lunch?" "Well, I just wanted to eat curry, like everyone else." "Oh, curry." "I see." "But, with your stomach... the spices..." "Well, maybe you could have seafood curry." "How about that?" "I love seafood curry." "Oh, I forgot to mention..." "You'll be moving to the alcohol ward in a few days." "Curry will have to wait until then." "We'll give you a sedative now." "Hold out your hand, please." "Here's water." "All right?" " You're hungry?" " Yeah." "This branch said to me, "I want to go here."" "Of course, there's no way it would say that." "I just thought that on my own." "But a long time ago, those instincts... let me see through my husband's affair." "Good morning." "Oh!" "Good morning!" "Well, this and that..." "Menopause?" "Well, yes..." "After 30, I got irritable." "I sweated nonstop." "When were you 30?" "Don't ask!" "In your 30s?" "About 20 years ago." "Wow!" "You look so pretty, Ms. Toyama." "You dressed up today." "What do you think?" "Does this look good on me?" "Oh, it does." "It looks great!" "Actually, my husband is coming to visit today." "I haven't seen him for a long time." "The weather's so nice, you can walk in the garden." "That's what I was thinking." "The front desk called to say your husband will be here soon"" "Want to wait there?" "Yes, please let me." "Your husband's here." "Are women in the alcohol ward?" "In a separate ward." "Why?" "Is that a concern?" "No, not at all." "Mr. Tsukahara?" "Come in." "Is this ward?" "Yes, the alcohol ward." "It's a locked ward." "I'll report him in." "Kimura is inside." "We'll keep your bag to inspect it." "Oh, I see." "Get well soon, Mr. Tsukahara." "Thanks for everything." "This way, please." "Are you feeling OK?" "You look pale." "It's my liver..." "I've been told." "This way." "A newbie?" "This is your room for now." "A room to myself?" "You start with lots of exams." "Before lunch, I'll set up a drip." "Please lie down." "Can you raise your sleeve?" "What's your name?" "Inose." "Your given name." "It's Momoka." "The characters for "hundred" and "good."" "Ms. Momoka." "This will prick a bit." "Mr. Minami." "Here." "Mr. Tsukahara"" "Mr. Urushiyama." "Mr. Kinjo." "Mr. Akasaka." "Mr. Sato." "Ah, listen up." "Let's introduce the new patient." "Your name?" "Tsukahara." "Glad to meet you." "Glad to meet you." "So..." "Please welcome him to your circle." "Welcome." "You're cute, so I'll let you off." "Chow down." "This is really pretty awful." "Atrophy of the brain." "The internist laid it on heavy." ""If this patient spits blood again, the ER won't save him."" "It's that bad?" "Yes, it's that bad." "You must know it yourself." "You have one foot in the grave." "So I'll be here for a while?" "You just got here!" "Don't be thinking about leaving." "Sorry"" "I'm sure you're sick of being asked, but can you explain why you drank so much?" "Well, I think I know the reasons." "But, doctor, will my response tell you how to treat me?" "Well, that's a sharp question." "But I can't answer it now." "First, tell me what you think the reasons are." "Well, all right..." "We can take our time." "Anyway, I'm your doctor." "Ida Psychiatric Doctor" "Ida Psychiatric Doctor a psychiatrist." "Ida Psychiatric Doctor" "Don't belittle me 'cause I'm a broad." "Wasn't that a line in a movie?" "So, could you please tell me about your childhood." "My childhood?" "Well..."" "The rice balls are done." "They look good." "I'll pack them in." "Are you finished with your stars, Kaoru?" "Just wait a minute." "Look, I made the octopus wieners!" "Want to fry them up?" "Bring them here." "Papa!" "You're here!" "How've you been?" "I missed you." "No food allowed in the smoking room" "I'll pour some tea." "...two weeks, good progress." "That's no good." "It's OK, I know" "OK." "Next." "Mr. Hoshino, in Room 211..." "This is good!" "Mama made the chicken." "Here." "That looks good, too." "I think I'll have one of those." "This knife work... must be Hiroshi." "Bingo!" "Mama did the frying." "Did she?" "Papa?" "What about the stars?" "The stars?" "They're too pretty to eat." "If the chef says, "Eat them," I will." "Do you know who made them?" "Mama?" "What?" "Not her." "I wonder who?" "Won't the chef say, "Eat them"?" "Eat them!" "What?" "Kaoru!" "You knew all along." "This is super delicious!" "Your specialty." "Good job." "Amazing, the spectators." "This is delicious." "Tastes great!" "A fine luncheon." "Yes, it was." "Yes, it was a fine luncheon." "Bye-bye." "See you." "How have you been feeling?" "I've hardly had any withdrawal symptoms, and I've been feeling calm and good." "Been reflecting a lot." "Oh, reflecting." "That's good." "And I've taken on meal duty." "That's great." "You've got ambition." "Nah..." "Doctor?" "Yes"" "Your glasses..." "you're not far-sighted, right?" "No, near-sighted, with a slight astigmatism." "Why not wear contacts?" "Listen, I ask the questions, you answer them." "Oh, I apologize." "You say you've been reflecting a lot." "Could you tell me what you're reflecting about?" "Well, yelling at my wife and making her cry, and..." "I don't remember much but, being violent... pretty much everything." "What did you yell about?" "Things I can't really say..." "Things you can't really say, but you went ahead and said them." "You called the hospital?" "Yes." "His internist is there." "What happened?" "Keep still." "You fainted." "Your chart said you had an appointment at the hospital today." "And your mother..." "Did you forget again?" "I'm sorry, I forgot." "That's no good." "You're still in danger." "Understand?" "The stretcher." "Now go." "They'll carry you down." "It's all right." "Let them"" "No, I can walk." "Are you sure?" "I'm OK!" "Shall I carry you?" "Carry me!" "Yeah!" "OK, let's walk slowly." "The taxi's waiting." "Can you walk there?" "I'm fine." "Really?" "Be careful." "Hello?" "It's Hiroko." "He was examined at the hospital, and he has a collapsed lung." "There's a hole in his lung... they're operating today." "He'll be there two weeks." "Ah."." "Hello?" "I'll call again when I know more." "Good-bye." "You're back." "Sooner than we thought." "You gained weight." "They fed you well." "Nah, I didn't eat." "Look at this." "We all have those." "Look, me too." "Mine is..." "What's the idea, showing your scars?" "Stop it." "Welcome back." "You OK?" "Welcome back." "You've been moved to a four-man room, it's this way." "Welcome back." "You look good." "He's in your hands again." "We'll resume treatment." "We'll take our time." "Come to the exam room." "Thank you." "Yasuyuki, I'll go now." "Pull yourself together." "Don't worry, he'll be OK." "Yes"" "Thanks." "Excuse us." "Mr. Tsukahara is back." "Welcome back." "Lucky you got back so quick." "I'm Hirose, a new patient." "I'm Tsukahara, glad to meet you." "Be nice now." "No fights." "Thanks." "Still on meal duty, Minami?" "Yes, I am." "Nothing's changed." "I'm not secretary anymore." "The guy with the nosebleeds, Kito." "And a new chairman." "Really?" "Who?" "I'm not sure you know him." "Sure he does." "Hello." "Back already?" "That was quick." "Sorry I wasn't in touch." "Don't worry about that." "There's a new chairman?" "Yeah, the guy with his back to us, Yoshida." "That guy over there, Sakai, is on meal duty." "I'll say hello." "Hello." "I just got back." "I'll be helping out." "Thank you." "Hey, Sakai!" "Why pull everything out of that cupboard?" "I'm just throwing away things we don't need." "You're a newbie." "How do you know what we don't need?" "I told you to ask Minami." "Even a newbie knows what's garbage and what's not." "Do that with Minami tomorrow." "I want to do it now." "Shut up!" "You can quit, you're useless." "All right." "Damn fool..." "Hey, you do meal duty again." "All right, I will." "Are you OK doing this?" "You just got back." "No problem at all." "The exercise is good for me." "All right... today's Tuesday." "Chow down, chow down." "Tuesday..." "Tuesday is curry!" "Curried cutlets..." "Lunch is ready." "Please come to the main hall." "Not eating?" "No, I'll eat." "That's swell." "Rice and boiled vegetables." "I'm not a big fan of curry, myself"" "I think we're all here, so I convene the patients' council." "The meeting starts at 3, please be on time." "I'm just 5 minutes late." "The first topic is a note that was placed in the suggestion box." "It's written on the white board." "I'll ask the petitioner to explain." "Yes"" "It's just as written there." "It's totally unfair to be fired for no reason." "And also, that newbie is just as inexperienced as I am." "Chairman, I want a response." "All right, I'll respond." "OK, everybody calm down." "Go for it!" "I won't do a thing." "Because you can't do anything." "Stop now, Mr. Sakai." "Calm down." "Nothing's gonna happen." "I'll respond now." "You just called him a newbie, right?" "I did, and he is, right?" "Can you name ten things that are in the cupboard?" "You can't." "How about you, Tsukahara?" "Well, there's pepper mix and red pepper, vinegar, hot oil, black pepper..." "Shall I list the spices?" "What else?" "There are 6 cups and saucers for visitors, 8 tea cups, and 6 large plates..." "That's enough." "See, Sakai?" "This guy was on meal duty before you came." "Get it?" "That's no reason to fire me without explanation." "I told you before." "If you have a question, ask a veteran like Minami." "You just didn't listen." "Anything else to address?" "Nope." "Nothing." "I want a drink!" "I wanna go home!" "All right, the meeting's over." "Hang on!" "My problem's not resolved." "Yoshida!" "Can we talk alone?" "I suppose." "Just 5 minutes." "Stop this." "It's OK, I won't hit him." "Right, Sakai?" "I mean it." "Please talk calmly." "I'm saying this is a matter of self-respect." "You don't fire a man without letting him speak." "You stubborn mule." "I told you not to go off half-cocked." "And what's this talk about "self-respect"?" "Alkies like you ain't got a shred of it." "That's interesting..." "Take that line, "alcoholics have no self-respect,"" "and write a report to the head doctor." "Right away." "He'll have a fit." "What?" "Say that again!" "Say that again, asshole!" "I said, write a report." "Or maybe your hands shake too much to write." "Stop, both of you." "Go back to your room, Sakai." "I'll kill you, jerk!" "Nothing good can come of this." "Relax, sit down." "All right, all right." "So it's true, toothless dogs bark loud." "Go to your room, jerk." "What?" "!" "Are you OK?" "Mr. Tsukahara, what happened?" "It's nothing." "It's nothing?" "!" "Sakai started leaving, then turned suddenly, and collided with Tsukahara." "Pretty weak lie." "Is it?" "What'll you do?" "Force us out?" "That'll give you a bad name." "A head-on collision, but only a small accident." "You don't feel like eating?" "It still hurts a bit." "Both of them were pretty heavily sedated." "Yoshida got depressed." "Want to watch TV in the lounge?" "Not now." "Thanks." "All right." "Hello!" "It's great you got a pass today." "Yeah, but it's only for an hour." "Want to drink?" "Nah I do." "Why don't you?" "I'm not drinking." "Don't drink." "Don't." "What'll you do when you get out?" "I want to come home, to your place." "I want to live as a family." "I wonder, can you call this a "family"?" "Don't you?" "Aren't we a family?" "We are a family." "Yes, we are." "We're a family." "Yoshida's mother..." "All of you..." "Please take good care of your health." "Thank you very much." "I'm sure you'll try hard and get better." "Good-bye now." "Good-bye." "Leave it to Yoshida..." "Finally gets a pass, and he runs off." "We lost our chairman, so we need to find someone." "How about you?" "Huh?" "I'm not fit to do it." "No one is fit to do it." "Kito's getting out soon, Minami and I have our presentations." "OK, for now, I'll do meal duty and be acting chairman." "That's best." "Is there a meeting today?" "Not for you." "Go sleep in your room." "Yoshida's gone, I hear." "Did I do something?" "Did you do something?" "You fought with Yoshida, and you pasted this guy in the face." "Don't you remember?" "I don't remember." "If I did, I apologize." "I'm sorry." "All right, we get it." "Go away." "Take a bath, and calm down." "Relax, relax." "What's the problem?" "Let go, you fool." "Let go!" "You're the fool!" "Trying to ram the door!" "He snapped." "I'm getting out just in time, he's your problem." "Your nose..." "Ah, it's nothing." "It's up to you." "Wait... it's up to me?" "Let's talk now." "Calm down, relax, OK?" "Mr. Ito..." "You had 40 yen this morning." "Did you call your wife?" "No, I didn't use it." "Really." "Where is it?" "I ate it." "You ate it?" "Purgative." "Prepare it." "I will." "Sit down here." "Please calm down." "Shall we go to a quiet room?" "Off to the lockdown room." "OK, now, calm down." "Mr. Ito." "Ah, lto's back." "Mr. Ito, I'm Tsukahara, on meal duty." "Glad to meet you." "Likewise." "Mr. Sakai..." "Mr. Ito will be sitting here, next to you." "Oh, the wild old newbie." "They let you out." "Who're you calling "old"?" "Look at yourself." "Mr. Tsukahara"" "Sea... food... curry." "Mr." " Tsukahara, please come to the exam room." "Mr. Tsukahara, to the exam room, please." "It's just 20 yen, that's all." "You can't break the phone and get money out, Mr. Ito." "You passed that 40 yen, and we gave it to you." "I used it, I kept dialing the wrong number." "So, lend me 20 yen." "We have a rule, no lending or borrowing." "Is that right?" "I understand." "So, let me go." "Let me go!" "You won't act up?" "I won't do anything." "What is it?" "Did you reach your wife, Mr. Ito?" "How could you do that, lock me in?" "You violate my rights." "I'm sorry, I didn't want to do that." "You lie, slut!" "You're the worst of them all." "Shit!" "Just take a look at this!" "Hey, what's this guy doing?" "He's out of hand." "You laughed, slut!" "I'm sorry, I didn't understand you." "Let's go back in a single room, OK?" "Mr. Tsukahara, let's talk outside"" "I'm afraid I'm going to see that in my dreams." "I want to call it a day." "You laughed!" "No..." "I had some good news, but... if you're gonna laugh at me..." "No, tell me." "Don't keep me hanging." "Mr. Tsukahara"" "Phases 1 and 2 were long, but you'll start Phase 3 next week." "Really?" "I can come and go, and get out soon." "That's right, but there's one thing that troubles me." "You talked about a recurring dream." "That you're searching for something, but you don't know what, and that irritates you." "Do you still have that dream?" "Yeah, I do." "It's not good to read too much into dreams, but have you figured out what you're looking for?" "No, I haven't." "And it still bothers you?" "Well, it doesn't bother me so much now." "It doesn't bother you." "Somehow..." "I don't know what I'm looking for, but it's OK just to keep looking." "Is that strange?" "No, not at all." "But, that Mr. Ito..." "What'll he do next?" "It's been a while since I saw one." "I'll dream about it." "A doctor shouldn't say this, but since it's you..." "I don't think there's much time." "What?" "Your husband... your ex-husband," "I don't think he's got a lot of time left." "So, forgive everything and welcome him back home." "It's best to reconcile and share his last days." "It's best for the children, too." "I think." "That's sad..." "What?" "No..." "I could say I'm happy and it'd be the same." "These days, it's hard to tell the difference between happy and sad." "What is sadness, really?" "When sadness is really deep, your body fills up with sadness." "Then you lose touch." "When I was young, too, sometimes it was sadness filling me up, but I was filled to the brim, and I couldn't tell sad from happy." "Somehow, I don't want to empathize..." "I don't want empathy." "From anyone." "Here." "Your prescription for 5 days of cold pills." "Try to rest." "If you spike a fever, come back." "Thank you." "What is it?" "Could I get a Lendormin?" "You didn't get one?" "I thought I could sleep, but I can't." "Wait a second"" "Please sign here." "Hold out your hand." "Thanks." "Good night." "Can't sleep?" "Unh." "I have my presentation, tomorrow at 10." "Oh." "That's right, you're getting out soon." "You'll be sleeping, I'm sure." "No, I'll come." "Oh, you don't have to." "But it'd help if you let me practice on you." "Sure." "I... killed someone." "What?" "My father, who I respected... actually, my stepfather..." "I killed him." "One night..." "I drank until dawn." "In the morning, he had to go to the hospital, and he asked me to drive." "I drove him, had an accident, and killed my father." "Only I survived." "Will you listen for me?" "I was born in a prefecture in the northeast." "It may sound dubious, but my parents abandoned me at 5 and I was taken in by relatives." "My stepfather was a very kind man, but my stepmother... always scolded me, calling me an impertinent adoptee." "I started drinking every day at 14, and by about 30, I had a fine alcohol dependence." "No, "fine" sounds strange." "No, it's OK." "By around 30," "I was completely alcohol-dependent." "Excuse me." "Mr. Tsukahara, you missed Mr. Kito's presentation?" "I was lost in thought." "It was a great talk." "It made me cry." "I would have cried, too." "Did you sleep through breakfast?" "I ate, but I didn't have much appetite." "I went back to sleep." "Oh, your mother asked you to call." "That's why I came by." "Thanks, I'll call her." "The hospital has your test results." "They asked me to come." "I'll go." "You don't need to come." "Are you sure?" "My discharge is near, and I'm feeling fine." "All right, take care." "I'm Tsukahara." "Thanks for waiting." "Cancer." ""It's kidney cancer."" ""It's too advanced to be treated surgically."" "I heard you hadn't come back from the hospital." "I see." "It's been a while, just the two of us." "Yeah, it has." "I realize now that my father was also alcohol dependent." "He drank every day and was violent with my mother." "I hated my father for it." "But I started drinking when I was in junior high, much like Mr. Kito, who was discharged recently." "After I graduated from high school, I was at loose ends." "Inside, I was anxious, I had thoughts that tore my heart apart." "I ran away from Sapporo and was working at a chicken shop in Tokyo, where I happened to meet a war photographer." "He told me a lot about his work." "I liked photos since I was a kid, so I studied on my own and then moved to Bangkok." "I saved money and was able to buy a camera, and I became a photographer." "I traveled to Myanmar and Sri Lanka, and then to Vietnam and Laos." "I went many places." "I took videos in addition to photographs, and once, I won an award." "Really?" "Yeah." "In Cambodia, a dictator named Pol Pot massacred more than a million of his own people." "A man named Ieng Sary was Pol Pot's #2 man, and I shot an interview with him." "But I wasn't able to sell that video to any TV network." "The reason was, it overlapped with news of Princess Diana's accident." "One person at a TV network said to me," ""Listen,"" ""given a choice between an Asian who killed many of his countrymen,"" ""and the tragedy of a beautiful princess,"" ""which will the masses watch?"" "Diana!" "Shut up!" "In Bosnia, I saw a gambling game called "Russian roulette."" "You put just one bullet in a six-shot pistol, stick the barrel in your mouth and pull the trigger." "Once, right before my eyes," "I saw a man blow his brains out and die." "But, at times like that..." "I guess my heart was shaken." "When I saw people in pain or people die like that, people suffering from hunger, all I could do was cry." "I was supposed to take photos, but I couldn't, and I didn't get any work done." "I began to think I wasn't fit for that work, and I totally lost my confidence." "I started drinking an enormous amount around then." "But then I happened to meet a woman and we got married." "She was a talented artist, but I... wasn't able to give her any support." "I myself would get drunk, and cause her pain, doing just like my father, who I hated." "The decisive moment was when..." "I took a drawing she had just finished, and tore it to pieces." "I think the booze had made me crazy..." "I don't think I can go on..." "I'm sorry." "Tsukahara, good job!" "Kaoru, look here." "That camera doesn't work." "Anyway, pose!" "I guess he drank that much to escape from something, but I couldn't grasp it." "Even if you had, could anyone have stopped him?" "In the end, I was of no use at all." "The same goes for me..." "But now..." "I think where his kids are is his place to come home." "Thank you." "That boy still has a place to be." "Wait, wait, wait." "Excuse me." "You've calmed down recently." "It seems so." "That's great." "You're going to be all right." "I wonder." "I don't know." "Oh, you get out tomorrow, right?" "Yeah, but I'm going right into another hospital." "A transfer?" "Diabetes, I bet." "Right?" "Something like that." "Nobody else here tonight." "It's more relaxing this way." "Usually, at this hour, it's crowded and..." "Hey!" "Somebody!" "Help!" "Somebody!" "Hey!" "What is it?" "Help!" "Did you come to?" "Papa, welcome home." "Welcome home, Papa." "Grandma's here, too." "Mother." "Isn't it great?" "You can be with your children again." "We're going to live together, from now on." "Any complaints?" "No." "When was it you got out, from the cancer hospital?" "It's been three months, since I became an outpatient." "Three months..." "Why do you ask?" "You're taking your time dying." "What?" "It'd be better if I died quick?" "It's better to live." "Even a wretched life." "It hurts... my eyes." "It hurts." "Don't run!" "The ocean won't run away!" "Okay!" "Papa, hurry up." "We made it." "It's big!" "The sea!" "Be careful." "Don't fall." "It's gigantic." "Hold my hand, my hand!" "I got wet!" "Tears fill my eyes in an instant it's because I'm thinking of you" "they're not sad tears tears of warmth what fills my heart to the brim" "is the passion I send your way" "I can make it through the darkest night like a well-worn phrase this ordinary love song" "I'll sing it for you again tonight because I really mean it at the mercy of the wind this puny little love song you'll take it into your heart oh, hold me tight" "courage wells up inside this heart that was in decay" "let me live with pride filled with joy" "like a well-worn phrase this ordinary love song" "I'll sing it for you again tonight because I really mean it at the mercy of the wind this puny little love song you'll take it into your heart oh, hold me tight" "tears fill my eyes in an instant it's because I'm thinking of you" "let me live with pride filled with joy" "let me live with pride all for you" "let me live with pride"