"EXPLOSIVE BRIGADE PIRATE MISSION" "There's no control, this is..." "What are you doing with that stick?" "This is not a stick but a state of the artwallets detector." " Look!" "A wallet." " It's a wallet!" " How much money is there in it?" " 300 dollars." "This is thieves' heaven." "And nobody's watching." "Nobody." "This is nuts!" "I detected a watch there." "Look." " So?" " Emilio, you're right!" "A watch!" "Is there anything else?" " What are you doing?" " Do you have money in there?" "Look!" "Yes, you do." "Let me hear it!" "Of course, madam." "We'll take care right away." " What's wrong?" " Two thieves on the beach." "This is the hotel's anniversary party and we have two thieves on the beach?" " Don't worry, madam." " What do you mean, don't worry?" "Jerk, stupid, idiot!" " The three things." " Then solve the problem, jerk, stupid, idiot!" "You, jerk, stupid, idiot!" "A guest called me and said there're are two men a gray-haired and a fat guy, stealing the guests' belongings." "Go to the beach!" "We had a life full of terrible and dangerous adventures." " We've been pilots." " We've been members of the famous Z Brigade." " The Z Brigade." " Do you know it?" " No." " The lifeguards?" " No." " And do you know what we are now?" " Convicts." " Don't worry, I'll take care of him." " Do it." "Come here!" "Didn't it hurt?" " Gino, take care of him." " No way!" "Come on, move!" "Come on!" "Come on, come on!" "Move, move!" "Shut up, fuck!" "This is a pirate attack!" "The jewelry!" "What are you hiding from?" "Give me that!" "Be careful, be careful!" "Hand us everything!" "Are you scared?" "Be careful." "You taste so good, baby!" " And what do you have for me?" " Nothing." "Let's go!" "Let's go!" "Let's go!" "Let's go!" "Get the booty on the boats!" "Go!" "Let's go!" "Hop in with the booty and let's go!" "Come on!" "Come on, pirates!" "Hurrah, pirates!" "Okay, okay!" " Here's the ridiculous fatty." " He's talking about you." " And the gray-haired dwarf." " He has it in for you." " What is this?" " Let them go!" "They are the security managers of the hotel!" " I needed security officers and I hired them." " Without consulting me." "Emilio is right." "You, shut up!" "You two, go to the exit." "You're fired." "And you two, keep watching!" "That's why I hired you for!" " I love you too." " I don't!" " She's nuts about me!" " Let's go and watch, grey-haired dwarf!" "If someone asks for me, I'm with the ridiculous fatty." "Thank you so much!" "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Marina Bay Hotel ...where we'll be enjoying this anniversary party." "I'm pleased and honored to present the person responsible for this party." "She's a beautiful and charming lady." "Her name is Ivonne Cruz." "Thank you." "Welcome to the anniversary party of my hotel Marina Bay." "For five years we've been giving our guests... great confort and hospitality and... above all, fun and safety." "The palm trees!" "The love of my life is about to come out." "Let the surprise begin!" "My fat sow!" " What's this?" " Please, madam!" "Do you like the cake?" "I like it." "Not on our anniversary!" "Who's responsible for this?" "Tell me!" " Did you like my acting?" " Who's this globe?" " You didn't like it?" " No!" "Get lost!" "Emilio!" "Emilio!" "What's wrong?" "Why do you have those sad cheeks?" "She fired me!" "And everybody laughed at me!" "They did it out of envy." "Everybody envies you and me." "I don't envy you, I hate you!" " Hit me and call me Marta!" " Marta!" " Martita!" " We're over!" "No, please, no!" " Your name is Emilio Marta?" " Martita." " Security!" " Who are you calling?" " Security." " That's us." "Here we are!" "That's us." "We're security officers." "What's wrong?" "They've just told me that Farallon Hotel has been robbed by pirates." " That's good news!" " What do you mean?" " They've been robbed, we haven't." " That hotel is 4 blocks away." "The Crocodile, the Nile's most valuable emerald is deposited in our safe." " And it's inside the crocodile?" " Triple the security." "To triple security, we need to hire 3 blood-thirsty officers and not the two useless thugs your reception-clerk hired." "Hire them now." "Listen carefully." "If just one pirate sets his foot on my hotel's beach I will personally see that you're killed, fired, humiliated and that no other hotel hires you, not even as a bellboy." "Is that clear?" " We're shrewd and keen-sighted." " And our farts are never sighted." "I'll rip your brains!" " Stevenson." " Yes, boss?" " Everything went as planned?" " We landed there as true pirates." " And our spy?" " Well, she kind of..." " Our spy?" " She made things easier." "But I was there and..." "An attack at sea, an attack on land." "We'll drive them crazy." "Of course, boss." "You're my boss so..." " How did my pirates work?" " As true pirates." " Did anyone try to go too far?" " Never!" "I, Stevenson, shall never let any of my pirates or Banister's pirates to go too far." "Pirates!" "Pirates!" "Pirates!" "Jack Banister!" "Excuse me." "Who said it's calling?" "Emilio, the bravest guy in Z Brigade." "You surely have heard about the exploits of Z Brigade." "No, but it doesn't matter." "All the brigades have been merged into the International Brigade." "How can I help you?" "I need three tall, strong and beautiful agents with a nice butt." "We have three who still have to complete their final training but..." " they could finish it in the Caribbean with our instructor." " I love you too." "No, I mean..." "What's his name?" "Joe Gorila." "I'll get in touch with him." "Yes, please." "Send the agents right away." "It's urgent, hanging and hot." "Bye." "Thanks." "What are you looking at?" "I wasn't looking, I was just thinking how ugly they are when compared to you my sweet chocolate bonbon, stuffed with caramel, and a strawberry on your mouth" "I don't want to see you again!" "You're a liar, mean and false Argentine!" " I'll have a a gastric belt performed on me." " No, come with your Martita." "I can picture her with a strawberry in her mouth saying "oinc, oinc"." "Come here!" " This is the tank I bought." " A tank should run over it." "You're wrong." "This is better than a girl." "It'll never betray you." " It's great!" "I love it!" " Let's go to work." "I love you so much!" "Dude, is there a traffic light that takes me to Jamaica?" " I'm scared." " Don't." "It'll be the job of your life." "But don't disappoint me." " I've never disappointed you." " Yes, you have." " No, I haven't." "I have never disappointed you." "Well, that's enough!" "Look!" "Look!" " Fame, glamour!" "Jet set!" " Do the restrooms have bidet?" " Bidet and a bathtub." " And water?" " No." " Then I won't brush my teeth." " There's the boss." " I've never disappointed you." " Hello." " How do you do?" " I brought my brother, as I promised." "My twin brother." " You're twin brothers?" " Who?" " You two." " Us?" " Yes." " Yes, we are." " Are you kidding me?" "I'll kick your asses." " Whose asses?" " Yours." " Ours?" " Yes." " No!" "You have harnesses, brushes and paint." "Wear a cap so you don't get sunstroke." "Idiots!" "You, follow me!" " How much money do you have?" " Not a cent." " Are you hungry?" " I'm starving." "We're going up." "Dude!" "I'm a dragon, dude." "Look!" "I'm a great juggler, dude." "I'm the "Maradona" of fire." "Thank you, people." "A bounty for Paolo." "Come on, don't be mean." "Help me." "I need to travel to Jamaica to search Bob Marley's spirit." "A bounty, guys." "It's for Paolo." "Help me, dude." "Don't be mean." "What's wrong with you?" "Killer elephants." "Don't leave me alone." "Bob Marley is alive!" "Bob Marley... is alive!" "Is he?" " Hi." "How are you?" " How do you do?" " These are two agent candidates." " Karen is waiting for you in section 5." " Thank you." " You're welcome." " I'm scared!" " Scared?" " Yes!" "I'm scared!" "There's only one solution." "Wait." " I'm hungry." " Are you?" " Yes." " That's your problem." " My problem?" "Oh my God!" "What's wrong?" "!" "I don't understand, dude!" " My chicken!" " Your chicken?" " Yes!" " Screw you!" "Bob!" "Bob sent it from Heaven!" "Oh my God!" "Bob Marley, you're God!" "I don't understand anything!" "This is great!" "Bob Marley is a genius, dude!" "Bob Marley is alive!" " I'm scared!" " I'm scared too!" " Then do something instead of whining!" " I am, I am pooping." " And I'm farting!" " No, no farting!" " Yesterday's training exhausted me." " Not you, everyone." "But it was great." "It was good." "My car!" "My car!" "My car!" " My car!" "My car is burning!" " Stop it!" "Let me help you." "Let me help you." "Welcome to International Brigade, South American branch." "Don't be amazed." "You earned it with hard work and sacrifice." "I congratulate you... for having been selected." "I'm chief of the organization." "This is Karen." "She'll give you the briefing for the next 24 hours and money for the mission." "I wish you luck." "Peace!" "Welcome." "Here you have 3 thousand bucks for each one... and this satellite cellular phone where you'll get your instructions day by day" "The password for the contact will be "Wee-wee Birdie"." " Wee-wee." " And the contact will answer "Poo-poo birdie"." "Poo-poo." "A secretary will collect your data for passports and tickets." "The third agent is waiting for you at the destination port." "Any questions?" "What's your name, brunette?" "Karen, dumb." " She likes me." " She likes me." "No, she likes me!" "Your agents' names, please?" " Whose names?" " Not your real names but the names you're called." " Poto." " And you?" "Pito." "But you can call me "Brad Pitto. "" "Or "Brad Little Pito"." "Excuse me for interrupting you." "Yes, you are." "We're investigating suspects." " But if you insist..." "Tell me." " She is Miss Sahira Miralles, our new guest." "She wants to deposit something in our safe box." "Don't worry." "I'll help the "signorina"." ""S'il vous plait", come with me." "We have the safest box in the whole island." "The most valuable emerald of the world is kept there, "The Nile Crocodile"." "Will you show it to me?" "I'll show you the emerald and the crocodile." "Is it a large or a small crocodile?" " It'll scare you!" " I'm so frightened." "Don't worry about Gino..." "Excuse me, a phone call." "It's the International Brigade." "Agents en route." "A karate specialist... black belt, a professional diver and an expert in weapons and explosives." " Passwords:" "Wee-wee birdie, poo-poo birdie." " What do those words mean?" " It's just a password." " But what do wee-wee and poo-poo mean?" " Piss and shit." " Why piss and shit?" "Why don't you take a shit?" " This is wrong." " It is." "But that's a good mistake." " It doesn't work properly." " Can you lend me your phone?" " And can you lend me yours?" " Of course." " Poo-poo birdie?" " Wee-wee birdie?" "Wee-wee!" "You two are the agents sent by the International Brigade?" " Sort of." " And you are the agent we had to meet at the destination port?" " Yes, at Dominican Republic." " We are in Dominican Republic?" " Yes." " We are in Dominican Republic?" "!" " Yes, why?" " Just curious." "An incoming message from the International Brigade." "Go to the port." "Board the barge." "Transfer to Marina Bay Hotel." "Hello?" "Wee-wee birdie." "Poo-poo birdie." " Agents Luli and..." " Poto." " Pito." "...agents Poto and Pito ready to get on board the barge." "ETA: 20 minutes." " Over and out." "Where are you going?" " You said "out"." " I meant the communication, not you." " But you said "out"." "But you said "out"!" "You said "out"!" "The tweezers movement began." " And the three agents?" " They've just called." "They'll be here in 20 minutes." " The circle is closing in." " It will close in on your neck if just one pirate sets one foot on my hotel." " Tell me." "What's the resemblance between a cannon..." " Shut up!" "Who's the nautical expert and the diver?" " That's a good question." " Who is it?" "I'm not, so it should be one of you." " It's you." " No, it's you." " I knew it since we were kids." " Who'll drive the barge?" " You should've started there." "I'll drive." "I drive barges, cutter, sloops." "He can't drive but we call him "Paddle"" "...because he gets paddies." " You'll drive the barge." " Boss, everything's ready for tomorrow like you asked." " Good." " I'll go with you." " What's wrong?" "You don't trust me, Stevenson your right hand, your left hand, your right and left feet, even your..." "If I didn't trust you, you'd be at the bottom of the sea!" "It's a delicate operation." "You'll soon know why Jack Banister will go with you" "Yes, I'm sorry." " We, pirates, are honest!" " Whatever you say." "But stay with me now, boss!" "I'm Stevenson!" "We, pirates, are honest!" "I'm Stevenson, your right hand!" "Boss, boss!" "Jack!" "Jack!" " I fell in love." " No, I fell in love." " No!" "I fell in love." " I'm the one who fell in love." " No, you're not." "I am." "You know?" "We both fell in love." " Stop talking about me and get to work." " Right away." " It's sick." " Oh, it's sick." " Screwdriver." " Screwdriver." " Come on, man." "Screwdriver." " Screwdriver." " Screwdriver." " Screwdriver." " Screwdriver." "There isn't any." "There's just this thing." " It can help." "Hand me the satellite phone." "I'll ask our contact to send us a barge." " Satellite phone." " Satellite phone." "What's wrong?" "Come on!" "We must do it today!" " I'm scared!" " Hurry." "Get down." " Easy, easy." " Follow me!" "We hit land!" "Land!" "Land!" "Land!" "Land!" " The island seems to be uninhabited." "Are there bugs?" " Predatory animals?" "The survival course says we should find fresh water first." "Let's go." " Can we wait here for you?" " Let's go, I said." "Let's go, she said." "She said"let's go"." "She said "let's go"." "I'm scared." "She said "let's go"." " Why did you touch my butt?" " Who touched your butt?" " You." " I didn't." " Lf you didn't, who did?" " They touched your butt?" " Yes." " That's weird." "We're twins and I didn't feel anything." " Come on, I said!" " Come on, she said." "But you go behind." "Will they touch my butt with delay effect?" "She said "come on"." "Luli, there are many bugs here." "Watch out." "There're many bugs." "Shut up!" "There're people here!" "Run!" "Run!" "Let's run!" "That smells like money." "Jewels!" " Jesus!" "What's wrong with you?" "!" " What do you mean?" " You hit my head!" " No, boss, I didn't." "Damn monkey!" "Run, monkey!" "Hit him, boss!" "Don't leave!" "It's leaving, boss!" "That's it." "Everything's ready." "The treasure from the robberies is safe in this island that doesn't even appear on maps." "Let's go!" " Good thinking, boss!" "Move your ass, Stevenson!" " What are you doing there?" "Help us!" " I'm scared!" "I want my mum!" " Leave that monkey." " No, if I leave it here, the bad guys will kill it" " And it witnessed a murder." " Okay, but don't let it interfere with our mission" " It's so cute!" " What are you doing?" "!" " I love it." " I'm not talking to you but to him!" "If he loves, I love." "That hurts!" "Inept, give me a pina colada with no alcohol." " Listen carefully." "No alcohol." " A pina colada with alcohol for me." " How are you, "mi bella fiore dell'orto"?" " What did you say?" " My beautiful garden flower." " Whose garden is it?" " Yours." " That's a pity." "I thought it was yours." "Holy cow!" "When you want to see the crocodile again, let me know." " Don't worry about it." " Let's make a toast for this passionate meeting." " To the garden and some "bambino"." " I've no problem with the garden." "But without "bambinos"." "Cheers." " It had alcohol!" " Fire." " I can't drink alcohol." "If I do..." " What happens?" "No, no, no." "This is a private beach." "No landings are allowed here." "Can we talk?" " We can talk, sing and dance." " I'm looking for the Brisa Marina Hotel." "This is it." "Welcome." "Come in, please." "Not you two." "If this is the Brisa Marina Hotel, then you are wee-wee birdie." " Poo-poo birdie." "Are you the agent?" " The three of us are agents." "Emilio, I'm done with waiting!" "And the agents?" " In fact, they've just arrived." " Luli, martial arts specialist." " Poto, expert in..." " Explosives." " Really?" " I'm Pito, I drive barges..." " Professional diver." " You and these people guarantee the hotel's security?" " Definitely." " You'd better be right." " I've had it up to here with him." "You have rooms 22 and 23." "Remember, the final training starts tomorrow." " Come on." " Come on." " Where's the monkey?" " And the monkey?" "Little monkey!" "Little monkey!" "Where's the monkey?" "Little monkey!" "I want my monkey!" "I want my monkey!" "I want my monkey!" "Where's the monkey?" "!" "Oh my God!" "Oh my God!" "Yes!" "Yes, perfect." "That's good news." "I'll let you know." "Here's everything you asked me, all the information, the island location ...it's all in that bug." " Who loaded it?" "One-armed Joe." "He's the only pirate who can handle computers." " And?" " I grabbed my knife and stabbed him where you know." " His entrails, his blood splashed me." " Why?" "No pirate can handle computers." "No pirate." "This attack will be deadly, Stevenson." "Deadly!" "Deadly, boss!" "That's my boss!" "That's my boss." "That's my boss!" "Deadly!" "That's my boss!" "That's my boss!" "She's a killer!" "Killer!" "Paolo is here!" "Great, dude!" "I don't believe it!" "I'm in Jamaica!" "We did it, Bob Marley!" "Jamaica, you and me!" "We're just one trinity!" "Long live Jamaica!" "Long live Jamaica!" "WELCOME TO DOMINICAN REPUBLIC" " Stop it!" "You're not kidding me." "You're not agents." " I want the monkey!" " I'm talking to you." " We want the monkey!" " I don't give a shit about the monkey." " You don't give a shit about me?" " I'm all alone!" " The monkey!" "The monkey!" " Hello!" " Can we talk now?" " What's your name?" " I don't believe it." "This is too much." " It has no name." " It has no name." " That's weird." "A nameless monkey." "We'll give it a name." "He's Poto, I'm Pito and you are..." " Let's figure a better name for it." " Think." " Yes, please, think fast." " Okay, okay." "Pucho!" "Do you like Pucho?" " It liked it." " It liked Pucho." " Thank God." " Who are you?" "Obviously you're not agents." " It was a terrible mistake." " A terrible mistake." " Don't repeat everything." "We were painting a building, you know?" "We were very high up." "We became dizzy and we fell." "A lady came in and gave us 3,000 dollars each." " Then "wee-wee birdie, poo-poo birdie"" "...and here we are." " What can I do?" " Protect us." " Let us keep the 3,000 dollars." " Who is it?" " Emilio." " It's open." " Ready for tomorrow's training?" " Yes, we are." " And the other two?" " In the bathroom." "Come out!" "I'm not telling anything, but you must begin your training now and become agents." "Is that clear?" " Yes!" " Think what you'll do with the monkey." "It's not coming." " Its name is Pucho." "Pucho." "Now it's all up to you." "And Pucho, the monkey?" "There it is!" " Ready?" " Yes, Sir." "Let's synchronize our watches." "What time do you have?" " 9:17." "And you?" " 9:18..." "Good morning." " The agents are ready for their training with Joe Gorila." " And you too." " We what?" " You must also train." " Why?" " Don't you see your excess fat and lack of muscles?" "If the pirates comes to my hotel, you won't fight them?" " No way." " No way we're both leaving the hotel." " One of us will handle internal security." " But not both of you." "He's right." "Now go and train." " Listen to me, gay." " What did you say?" " No, a friend of mine, Gary." "He's leaving." "Bye, Gary." " I'll greet Gary." " I'll kick his ass anytime now." " Excuse me?" "I'll beat him up." "Gino, go and train." " Why me?" "You go." " Who's the most intelligent of the brigade?" " I am." " Then who must train?" " Me." " I'm proud to be your friend." "Gary!" "Come on!" "Let's go." "We must train." "One, two, three, four." "I want my mum!" "Sergeant Joe Gorila." "Identify yourselves." " Sergeant Luli, at your service." " Pito." "Poto." "Move!" "I told you to move!" " I want my grandma!" " And I want my grandpa!" "I told you to move!" "Don't leave me alone." "One, two!" "One, two!" "What does one balloon tell the other in the desert?" ""Look out for the cactussss!"" "Listen. "Mum, at school they call me John Travolta. " "Who?"" ""Him, him and him. "" "I have another one." "What does the spoon tell the sugar?" "I wait for you in the coffee." "That's enough!" "I want each one of you to show your abilities!" "Killer!" "And what's your ability?" "I can fart." "I haven't farted yet." " What are you doing?" "!" " I'm just walking behind you." " And your hands?" "Have you gone nuts?" " No, madam, I haven't." "You have gone nuts." "I love nutters." "Come with me, nutter." "Give me a chance." "How do you do?" " How are my brave men doing?" " Your brave woman, you mean." " She's gorgeous." " Look at your other brave men." " She's good." "The rest suck." " I knew about Gino, but not the other two." "They're totally incompetent." "Gino!" "Gino!" "He wants to kill us." "He's a killer!" "You embarrassed me." "You're a member of the Z brigade." "You should've set the example but..." "Sgt., double your efforts." "Make them work their biceps, their triceps but essentially their "cuatriceps"." "Is that clear?" " Sir, yes, sir!" " On guard!" "Attack!" " Who?" " The sergeant." " Are you crazy?" "Tito?" "Little Tito?" "Come, please." "Come." "I need you, Tito." "Little Tito, come and wash my back, please." "Tito!" "I'm calling you!" "Please, Tito." "Okay." "Please, come." "Wash my back." "Yes!" "That's so nice, Tito!" "I should've called you before, honey." "Now my breasts, please." "A monkey, fuck!" "It raped me!" " There's Luli." " Training in the jungle, complete." " Result?" " They are a wreck." "May I be dismissed?" "Security!" "Security!" " There's a monkey in my hotel!" " What do you mean?" " Didn't you hear me?" "What did I say?" " What did she say?" " There's a monkey in the hotel." " Then hunt it, catch it right now!" "The monkey will be caught and muzzled." "And what's that?" "An evacuation exercise drill." "It turned out perfectly well." "What are you waiting for?" "What are you doing?" "!" "Gino!" "Hunt the monkey!" "Me?" "No!" "Not the monkey!" "Come on." "Whoa!" "Agent Hyena, alias Spank on the Ass, reporting himself." "Agent Tiger reporting himself." "You must travel to Dominican Republic." "Mission:" "To take out the pirates and unmask the two phony agents that took your place." "You could come and we could have some drinks on the beach and..." "These are records and the pictures." "Get ready." "You're travelling tomorrow." "What are you doing tonight?" "Because..." "Just a few more words and she'll accept" "A whole dictionary." " Agent Luli, permission to talk." " What is it?" " I'm an agent, they are not." " It's true." "It was a terrible mistake." " A terrible mistake." " What do you mean "a terrible mistake"?" " Are you deaf?" " Are you deaf?" " Why do you repeat everything?" " We're twins." " I know." "It's Christmas Eve today and tomorrow's Christmas." "The town's jet set will celebrate here and we have the Nile Crocodile in our safe box." " But I'm here, and so are you and Gino." "She doesn't get it." "Gino and I are the managers of the hotel." " And we're very coward." " But weren't you agents?" " That has always been a big mistake?" " What do you mean "big mistake"?" " Are you deaf or what?" " What?" " I won't be fired because of you two." " We won't let that happen." " We won't." " You surely are totally incompetent." " Is it difficult?" " We can learn." "I'm sure the pirates have spies in the hotel." "We'll do the same." " You'll be a maid and will search all the rooms." " Maid." " And you will be a cook." " A cook." " Come on, cook." " Come on, maid." "That way." "And me?" "Let's go and have a drink." "I caught the monkey!" "I caught the monkey!" "Where's the monkey?" "I want to see it." "Where is it?" " I caught it!" " He caught it!" " Where is it?" " There!" "Disgusting monkey, I hate you!" "A big monkey." "Is it a he or a she?" " Are you stupid?" "!" " I'm not, he is." " Both of you are stupid!" " Monkeys are well fed here." "It looks like an oven." " Hyena, do you copy?" " Yes, I do, Tiger." "See you at the gym." "The final training begins." "GYM" "What are you doing?" "You're making a mess!" "Come here!" "You must behave yourself or they'll fire us!" "Get in there!" "Don't play dumb with me or I won't bring you again!" "Stay there!" "Don't move!" "Stay there!" "I want my mum!" "I want my mum!" "Fantastic!" "Great!" "A cake war, come on!" "Dude, choppers with cream are flying over us." "What is it, dude?" "Emilio!" " Yes, madam?" " The monkey, the monkey!" "Gino, catch the monkey." "What's this?" "!" "This is apple, madam." "Don't worry, madam." "I'll take care." "And what's this?" "!" "This is cream and this is chocolate." "Nobody hits my lady!" "Hit me!" "Come on, hit me!" "I'd be pleased." "This is great!" " Excuse me." "I'm the maid." " Come in." "I'll hang up, but this is the opportunity you were waiting for." "I won't stand another mistake from that jerk." "I have to hang up." "Bye." "What are you doing there, standing like an idiot?" "I'll clean up." "Hey, you." " Rub it." " Me?" "Rub it?" " Rub it." " The cream." "I'm great at rubbing cream." "I've been rubbing cream all over Manhattan." "So..." "So show me and shut up." "Come on, man!" "Come with me, baby!" "The monkey is still at large and tonight it's our Christmas party." " Everyone in the island is coming." " Don't worry, madam." "How can I not worry?" "The monkey, the pirates, the Nile Crocodile and you tell me not to worry." " I want the monkey here in 5 minutes ...tied up and muzzled." "Killer face." "Even more." "More!" "He can't." "He's like you." "Fulfill your mission!" "Anything else?" "It's a custom of our hotel for the manager to dress up as Santa Claus and serve the guests." " Me as Santa Claus?" "Yes, you." "Bye." "Go and fuck yourself." " I'm sorry?" " Go to the fort of the island and look for Gary." " Again?" " Yes." "Santa's here." "Today... we'll make the biggest attack of the last years!" "I want to know if I can count on your bravery and ferocity!" "Everything's ready?" " Yes, boss." "Like you asked." " Our spy?" "Well, she..." "She confirmed the operation." "Everything's ready." "I will personally lead this operation." "Then we'll go to the Mediterranean." "Yes!" "We'll loot the Mediterranean!" "PRESENTS FROM SANTA CLAUS" "Everything looks wonderful, beautiful." "I hope everything's perfect." "Everything will be perfect." "Only Santa Claus is missing." "I hate you, Santa Claus!" "What's wrong, honey?" "It's me, your Martita." "Emilio, I'm sorry." "I thought you were the real Santa Claus." " And you'd kill the real Santa?" " Yes." " Why?" "He never brought me a present when I was a little girl." "He must've forgotten your address." "Today it's Christmas Eve, I'm Santa and you must do me a favor." "Yes, I will help you." "And for you I'd do anything." "She's the sow of my life." " Agents are ready and waiting for your orders." " What orders?" "Oh, yes." "Watch the entrances and exits." " And the potential entrances and exits from the party." " Yes, Sir." " No, not like that." " How then?" " Undercover." " Yes, Sir." "And at this Christmas party, I want a big round of applause for Santa Claus." " Very good, Emilio, congratulations." " I've studied drama for years." "I can tell." "Changing the subject, we have full security for the party?" "Please." "My staff has strict, fictitious, virtual orders to control everything." "But they're undercover." "So undercover that even I cannot recognize them." " Lf they're so undercover, how will you contact them?" " I'm sick of you." " Emilio, please!" " A punch is being raffled, and you have all the tickets." " He's always picking at me." " He's right." "Shut up." " And the monkey?" " Making monkey faces." "Gino is taking care of that." " Excuse me, I have to go." " Yes, please." "Gino!" "Emilito!" "I think I found the monkey." "I can sense it and smell it." " He can also smell you." "Catch it." " What can I do?" "Monkey business." "Change your look." "Get dressed up." "Fool it." "I'll dress up so that it doesn't recognize me." "Let's synchronize our watches." "What time is it?" "Congratulations!" "Hi, Emilio." "He looks so small." "The Christmas toast is about to take place." "Is everything under control?" "Controlled, sealed and airtight." "I know they're all undercover, but where are they?" " We're all dressed up as Santa Claus." " Great idea." "Excellent." "Wonderful." "But..." " You're so many." " So many." "Congratulations." "Emilio looks so small." "Stop, Emilio, stop." "Jingle bells, jingle bells." "Santa Claus is here." "Thank you, Emilio." "Thank you, Gino." "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the best party of the year." "The party of my Marina Bay Hotel." "Let the party begin!" "This is a pirate attack!" "Nobody move!" "Nobody!" "Guys!" "This is Christmas at Marina Bay." "Emilio!" "You!" "To the vault!" "Move!" "Come on, pirates!" "Come on!" "Move!" "Come on, Stevenson, take her!" "Look at these jewels." " What the fuck is going on?" "!" " It's her." "Catch her." " Stevenson, we'll take her." " Christmas has come." " Stevenson, move!" " That's the best order you ever gave me." "Why are you running?" "Santa is here." "Come, your Christmas present is here." "Damn sex doll" "Come on, pirate!" "We have the jewel!" "Retreat!" "Come on, Stevenson!" "Move!" "Security!" "Security!" "Hey, you are my security agents." "The pirates robbed the Nile Crocodile." "Where is Emilio?" " The pirates took Emilio hostage." " And Luciana." "And what did you do?" "You couldn't even catch a single pirate, jerks!" "What do you mean?" "Look!" "The pirates attacked the hotel and took Emilio and Luli hostages." "Run the Instalset satellite program." "The password is broccoli 3-4-5, 25 A." "Broccoli 21, "choccarella spacata"." "Connect!" "What else?" " The two male agents there phony." " What?" "The real ones, Hyena and Tiger, are arriving at your hotel." "Thank you." " So you're not agents!" " Did you see my face?" " Do I look like an agent?" " No." " Then don't bullshit me." "Give me a break!" "Luli and Emilio are held hostages and you speak nonsense!" "You're right." "Our backup is on its way." "Check out." "Can you see the truck?" "I don't see any white truck with a sign that reads "Presents from Santa Claus"." " Wait." "That's the hotel." " So?" " That's Sahira Miralles." " She's so cute." "I saw her at the party last night with the pirate leader." "They were..." " And if she's the spy?" " So beautiful and a spy?" " Let's follow her." " Let's follow her." " Yes, let's do it." "Come, pirates!" "Come here, guys!" "Pirates!" "Pirates!" "The Nile Crocodile is here!" "Move, let me through!" " 20 of us left for the hotel and 21 came back." " What do you mean?" "There's a traitor here." " Line up." "One by one." " You heard the boss." "Line up, ladies." "Come on!" "You'll see!" " Who are you?" " I'm One-eyed." " And you?" " Scar." " Who are you?" " Peter Pan." " And you?" " I'm Hook." " Who are you?" " I'm Dead." " Take him to the dungeon." " Not me, Gino's the smartest one in the brigade." "Come!" "Let's go, let's go!" "Follow that boat!" "Let's go!" "Come on, Brigade!" "Follow the spy on the boat!" "Follow her!" "Follow her!" "She's heading for the other island." "Who sent you?" "!" "Who are you?" "!" "What do you know about us?" "!" " Poor thing, let her go." " I won't say a word." " More!" " Yes." "Talk." "Talk." "What's wrong with you?" "Are you a member of the International Brigade?" " My blood type is Rh+." " Mine is Rh Chicken." " You're going to die!" "She's going to die." " So young." "I'll let her family know." " You!" "You answer me!" " A flying cow." "Talk or "dunga-dunga"." "To me?" " Your best spy is here." " My best pirate." " I can't see a thing." "Everything's completely dark." " Dark?" "Remove the caps." "I can see now." "Everything looks so small." " This is so nice." " They're upside down, fool." "Let me see." " Jesus!" "There are around 200 pirates." " We're screwed." " No, Emilio is." "He's about to be cooked in a saucepan." " Where?" "In a hut." " And Poto?" " He's camouflaging himself." "Call that chicken or we won't even find Emilio's bones." "I won't taste good." "And I didn't take a bath today." "It smells bad in here." "Don't you have chicken broth?" " Luciana, do something!" " You must do something." " Why me?" " You're the man." "No, my name is Marta." "Sow!" "Gino!" "Please come and help us!" "Poto!" "Poto!" "Poto, come here!" "The pirates are here." "My butt!" "What the hell?" "Jesus!" "Poto, come and defend me." "Poto?" " You are not Poto, are you?" " No." " Neither are you." "Have you seen Poto?" " Who are you?" " He's the guy who stole our mission." " Where's the other?" "Violence only causes more violence." "Look, there's Poto." "Come here!" "Guys, guys, guys." " It's all been a terrible mistake." " Yes, a terrible mistake." " Let me explain it to you." " That's enough." " Don't touch me." " Who are you?" "I'm agent Gino." "Emilio is about to be cooked and they also have agent Luli." "There's no time!" "Attack, brigade!" " And these two?" " Bring them." "They'll be cannon fodder." "Come on!" "What's that?" "A satellite map of this area." "See?" "Here are Emilio and Luli." " You have sharp eyes." " I'm an agent." " We must use one of Z Brigade tactics." " I know one." " Which one?" " Kick their butts." " Kick their butts!" "Yeah!" " Let's go!" "Let's make a toast!" " To Stevenson's great work, Banister's right hand!" " Shut up." "Let's make a toast to Jack Banister's pirates, to Jack Banister." "Yeah!" "Let's make a toast to the Nile Crocodile!" "Fight, pirates!" "Fight to death!" "Come on, my men!" "Gino, you saved me!" "Look what they're doing to me." " I can see it." " Taste the broth." "Taste it." "Taste it." "Does it taste good?" "That's weird." "I was so scared that I pissed my pants." " I'm from the brigade." "How many are there?" " Twenty." " Are they armed?" " I don't know." "Don't worry." "I'll defend you." " Don't sweat it." " No, I can defend myself." " I defended you." " Yes." "Wait a minute!" "Stand up, stand up!" "Stand up!" "Get up, asshole!" "Wait, wait!" "Come on, asshole!" "What do you have for me?" "!" " Boss!" "Boss!" " Get away from me!" "Nobody!" "Jack Banister can deal with all of you!" "Come here." "Take this!" "Wait, guys!" "Long live the pirates!" "I love pirates!" "Wait, asshole." "Long live the pirates." "You'll make a mess with my hair." "Guys, please!" "Wait, guys." " Thank you!" "You're a real champ." " You're welcome." "Look!" "There's a pirate and he didn't see us." "Go and attack him." " Come on!" " No, you go." "I'll cover your back." " Both of us will go." " Okay." "Careful." "At the count of three, we'll attack." "On three." "Three!" " We thought you were a pirate." " A pirate?" "Sure." "Can't you see I'm Jack Sparrow?" "His reincarnation." "Don't you see it, baldie?" "Guys, Johnny Depp!" "We are winners!" "We are killers!" "Be afraid!" "Agent Gino is back!" "We won, we won!" "We won!" "We won!" "We won!" "And?" "No more pirates?" "Come on, brigade, this is amazing!" "We were great!" "Let's go get the others!" "Dude, I know more punches than the famous wrestlers!" "No more violence, squint-eyed weasels." " Come on, guys!" " Good, good!" "Great, brigade!" "This is the new Z Brigade!" "You two deserve to be a part of the brigade." "Tiger, we have another mission." "You take care of the pirates." "See you in next mission." "Now we'll go and find Emilio and Luli." " Your hand." " We're the new agents." " Let's make a toast!" " Long live the brigade!" " Now we have to get back the emerald." " We'll get back the Nile Crocodile." "Don't make faces." " I think he wants to tell us something." " Yes, he wants to talk." " Come on, talk." " He choked over something." "That's no problem." " Good." "Now we'll go get the emerald." " There's no need for that." "I have it." " What?" "You ate it?" "How did you do that?" " It was in the glass of beer." " What do we do now?" " That's easy." "We cut him up." "Don't be cruel!" "Forget the emerald and get back the pirate's treasure." "That's right!" "This stone is mine and only mine." "And my friend Gino's too." " No, no!" "There must be a pirate's treasure." " Otherwise..." " We know who has it." " Not us, someone else." "Who?" " You're two idiots." " Absolutely." "My beloved monkey!" "Hello, little monkey." "How do you do?" " Listen to me, monkey." " Its name is Pucho." " Pucho." "Pucho." " Nice little Pucho." "Your friends here tell me you saw the pirates burying the treasure." " Tell the truth." " And nothing but the truth." "Did you get it?" "The pirates buried the treasure." " He's a monkey, not an asshole." " You ask him." "Here it is!" "Here it is!" " The shovel." " Great, Pucho!" "You won't disappoint us, dear Pucho!" " Come on!" " Open it!" " Done." " I don't believe it." "The money must be here." " Good!" " That's a lot of money." "Don't touch anything!" "Come with me." "I want to tell you something." " We'll split the treasure." " No, the brigade's mission is to help the poor." " I'm the oldest agent and I had many expenses." " It's for the poor." "I'm the smartest guy in the brigade." "My ability should be recognized." "Guys, guys." "The treasure must be destined to the needed." "The brigade has always fought against evil and in favor of the needed." "I wanted to see your reaction." "You wouldn't think Gino and I would..." " No!" " Long live the brigade!" "Now we'll put the treasure away..." " And the treasure?" " It was here." " Where is it?" " Pucho!" "Pucho!" "Dear Pucho!" " Monkey, holy shit!" " Its name is Pucho." " Pucho, my partner, go f..." " Tell him!" "...the jewelry!" "I'll kill you, monkey!" " Monkey, come back!" " Send me an e-mail..."