"You can go ahead, rodney." " I don't remember where to start." " Sure you do." "No." "Start with your name like we've been doing, okay, and we'll just go from there." "My name... my name is..." "Mr.Rodney mckay." "No... yes." "Come on, now." "You're Dr.Mckay, remember?" "No, I'm" " I'm not anymore." "I'm not s-s-smart anymore." "Doctors are smart, so I'm mister now." "Okay." "I used to be the smartest person ever... and-- and now... now I'm not." "That's what we're trying to fix, right?" "No, you can't fix me." "You know we're trying our very best-- no, you can'T." "You can'T." "it's okay, rodney, what's the next thing you're supposed to say?" "Where... where did john go?" "He just had to go away for a few minutes." "He'll be back-  john!" " Rodney... rodney, I'm your friend, I'm right here." "Where are you, john?" "John!" "Why the hell didn't you tell me my brother was this far gone?" "It's happened pretty fast, jeannie." "No, I..." "I got a message from him just a couple of weeks ago." "he seemed perfectly fine." "He'd never been so nice." "That would have been shortly after he became infected." "I didn't recognize the symptoms in time." "It's not your fault, doc." "Frankly, mrs." "Miller, we contacted you as soon as we became aware of the seriousness of his condition." "In fact, daedalus dropped you off at the first available gate in pegasus because we were concerned that you wouldn't make it here in time." "We thought you deserved a chance to say goodbye." "Stargate Atlantis Season 05 Episode 06" "The Shrine" "Dr.Keller wanted to take a moment to prepare him for your visit." "Yeah, I, uh..." "I think I need a moment myself." "How did... how did this happen to him?" "Um, there was a little snafu on the last mission." "Colonel sheppard, when you reach the research camp, please remind Dr.Nichols that he is now... one hour and 15 minutes overdue for his scheduled check-in." "Right, want me to smack him around or anything?" "Just the reminder, please." "Shouldn't we be concerned for Dr.Nichols' team?" "No, the settlement's a half hour away from the gate." "He's got them checking in every six." "I'm sure nichols is just tired of taking the round trip." "Still, it wouldn't hurt to bust his chops a bit." "That nichols is so arrogant." "Amelia, I think I'm going to risk heading down to breakfast before they check in." "I just mean that... it will probably take them some time to get to the camp, and then more time for nichols to get back to the gate and report." "There's really no point in my... telling you this." "Not really, sir." "Right." "Be back in 20 minutes." "Unscheduled offworld activation!" "Activate the shield." "I'm not receiving an idc." "This is sheppard." "Do not lower the shield." "The entire tower will be flooded." "I have no intention of doing that, colonel." "What's your status?" "It's cold and wet." "The stargate's underwater." "The entire valley's flooded." "And it's freezing!" "We need you to send a jumper through so we can stay warm and dry until the water recedes." "Will do, colonel, hold on." "Holding on." "Sheppard out." "Rescue one is standing by." "What's taking so long?" "Why isn't the gate disengaging?" "It's the water." "The constant pressure's forcing the wormhole to stay active, which means we're going to have to wait the maximum amount of time a stargate can stay open." "38 minutes." "Well, we're down to 32, and before you say I told you so, we had no choice." "I can't stop shivering." "You're letting all the hot air out of your mouth." "All right, everybody, you'll be warm soon enough." "I don't know, I think I got wetter than you did." "I don't know, I golea litt damp dialing the dhd." "The research camp was farther up this valley." "I'm a little concerned r Dr.Nichols' team." "Right." "Anyone at the research camp, this is colonel sheppard." "Please respond." "I repeat, this is colonel sheppard." "Please respond." "I'm pretty sure they're all dead." "We can't know that, rodney." "Look, the research team was studying the effects of global warming." "They set up camp at the foot of a massive glacier up the valley." "You think an ice dam broke?" "It fits." "The ancients don't put stargates on a flood plain, and I certainly don't think the tide just came in." "It explains why the water's so freezing." "Aw, okay... okay, so now I'm hot, and I'm still shivering." "Were you running a fever before we left?" "I don't know, maybe." "I'm always running something." "All right, I think the water's receded a little." "So we're going to be stuck here all night." "In the back of a warm, cozy jumper, all right?" "All you need to do is hold on for, I don't know, 30 minutes or so... how long has he been unresponsive?" "Since he fell asleep in the jumper." "About nine hours." "Okay, let's get him to the infirmary." "I want him under a scanner." "I want to have a look at you guys, too." "We're good." "By that I mean now." "I think you've just made a case for my proposal to send a malp ahead of every single transit." "Stuff happens, woolsey, and by "stuff,"" "I mean" " I know what you mean, thank you." "Why didn't you return in the jumper I sent you?" "Well, I ordered the rescue party to continue the search for nichols' team." "There's a chance they're still alive." "Of course." "I got to go get checked out, and then, uh, I'm going to check on rodney." "Well, how's our boy?" "No fever, no hypothermia, nothing on the scan at all." "How about you guys?" "Like I said, we're good." "Yeah, yeah." "But we're not the ones who became unconscious." "Well, I didn't really get much sleep the night before, and I did skimp on breakfast, so... you know, woolsey wants to send out a malp before every transit now." " Well, that's going to get old fast." " That's what I said." "Hey, can I go now?" "I feel a little silly lying here." "I'm keeping you under observation for a little longer." "Besides, I ordered you dinner." "Well, then you can observe me eat, because I'm famished." "It's official." "He's better." "See you guys." "Do you want me to send them in?" "Okay." "Rodney's all ready for you." "What am I supposed to say?" "Doesn't matter." "Meredith?" "It's me." "It's jeannie, mere." "I'm-- you're my sister." "Yes." "Meredith's my... real name." "It's your first name, that's right, but you never liked it." "No." "No, it'S... a girl's name." "Sometimes, yes, but you go by rodney." "Rodney mckay," "Mr.Rodney mckay." "Rodney mckay, rodney mckay... you're crying because of me." "No, I'm crying because I've missed you very much." "'Cause you're my sister." "That's right." "I'M... sick." "I know." "I know." "I'm here now." "I... sweetie, I just need to go outside for one second, okay?" "I will be right back, I promise." " Hey..." " I know." "I just need a second." "I just don't want him to see." "I know how you feel." " I felt the same way." " I'll go back in, I will." "He needs me, and I want to be able to say goodbye, but it's like..." " it's like he's already gone." " I know." "There's a way." "What?" "How?" "There's a place." "I've been there before." "He'll be himself again, and you can say goodbye." "I don't understand, then why haven't you already taken him?" "Because it's dangerous, but I'm willing to risk it if you are." "all set?" "Remind me to register a complaint with whose ever idea this was." "It was yours, actually." "Oh, ho ho... well, complaint duly registered." "It was a good idea to keep a record of what's happening to you" " and how fast, but if you'd rather not-- - no, it's fine." "It's fine." "My name, right?" "Right." "Hey, I remembered something." "Yay!" "My name is Dr.Rodney mckay." "I'm head of the department of science something in atlantis in the, um... for god's sake... in the pegasus galaxy." "Okay, not bad, keep going." "Jennifer, there'S... there's something I wanted to, um... you know, while I remember, while I still can, something I wanted to say... go ahead." "Jeannie, uh..." "I wasn't expecting anyone this late." "Yeah, I'm kind of one of those people who needs all the information they can get." "This is his most recent scan." "This dark area that looks like a tumor is actually a parasitic organism." "Its tendrils spread far beyond any hope of surgical extraction, and it's not responding to treatment." "Even stasis barely slowed its progression." "There are still a number of drug combinations that-- he was infected somehow on his last mission?" "Well, maybe, but not necessarily." "It was too small to show up on a scan at the time, but in the pegasus galaxy, the condition is fairly common among the very old." "Right, so why him?" "It's possible we're all exposed to it and fight it off." "Rodney was already suffering from a viral infection when he went on the mission at m44 5y9, and then all that time in freezing water-- so his resistance was low." "The parasite doesn't so much as kill cells as render them dormant for reasons I still don't completely understand, but the net result is ever-diminishing brain function." "As it spreads, he'll lose motor control, regulation of organ function-- ronon's people call the disease "second childhood."" " You talked to ronon." " Yes." "Okay, I know what he's told you." "That he's dying, and there's nothing you can do." "No, he's dying, and I'm doing everything I can." "I have to ask you... why did you tell me you didn't recognize the symptoms in time?" "Because he was already showing the symptoms when he came back from the mission, and..." "I didn't see it." "So?" "Just what the doctor ordered." "Funny." "You want my fruit cup?" "No, no, no." "I think you do." "Eating from the patient's tray is kind of frowned upon." "Jennifer, we practically dated." "You bought me one drink." "That's hardly dating." "Right, so now I'm asking you to have dinner with me." "I mean, such as it is." "I do love the fruit cup." "Not that this is exactly the dinner I had in mind, but... is that an invitation?" "Only if you promise to accept." "If I wasn't so taken by the new rodney mckay the parasite might've been small enough for me to operate without causing significant brain trauma." "By the time he started to forget, it was too late." "I haven't given up on trying to find a treatment-- ronon told me about this place that could give mere one more day as himself again before he dies." "Jeannie, you can't possibly believe-- and that you're the one who won't let him go." "It's on a planet called talus." "It's one of the original worlds of the ancestors." "It took us about five or six hours to get there from the gate, but I was just a kid, and my grandfather had to be carried most of the way." "We could do it in about half that time." "There's a small problem with that plan." "The wraith established a major outpost there during the replicator war." "It's still there." "Yeah, well, that's never stopped us from going anywhere we needed to go before." "Well, it's not just that." "You don't believe it's real." " I'm not saying" " I am, actually." "I was there." "Yes, but you were six years old." "Ronon, listen to what you've told us-- a magical shrine, inside a cave, behind a waterfall-- did I say it was magic?" "No, but you did say that people afflicted with mckay's condition suddenly revert to their former selves for... the shrine of talus is also known among my people, for victims of the second childhood." "It offers the gift of one last day, and a quick death." "That doesn't necessarily make it real." "I'm telling you that in a matter of seconds I saw my grandfather go from someone who couldn't speak his own name, to the man that taught me how to track and hunt." "You learned to hunt when you were six years old?" "For one day, he got to hold his wife in his arms, and share a meal with the people that he loved, and then he died with honor." "You can say I was too young to remember, but I know what I saw, and we can do the same thing for mckay." "If you think that's not worth it, you're wrong." "I've never told anyone this, outside of... my father had a disease called alzheimer'S." "It's similar in many respects to the condition that Dr.Mckay is suffering from." "My point is, I had a similar moment with him to the one you just described." "He hadn't recognized me, literally, for months, then one day, out of the blue, he had a moment of absolute clarity." "He said "richard, what are you doing here?"" "And I said," ""dad, I, uh, I'm here to see you,"" "and he said... he said, "isn't that wonderful,"" "and then he was gone again." " Now, couldn't you be remembering a similar-- - it's not the same." " Ronon, look" " I owe him this!" " I'll take him myself." " I'll go with him." "Hold on, hold on." "We know for a fact there are two hive ships and 10,000 wraith on the ground." "If we're even going to consider this, all right, we have to make a plan." "Fine, make your plan." "I'm sorry, but he's not going anywhere without my permission, and you won't get that until we talk to rodney." "Hey, rodney... you got some visitors." "John's here." "So are teyla and ronon." "The whole team." "Ronon dex." "That's right, buddy." "I want to take you to a place, a place that's going to give you a chance to be yourself again for a little while." "As you were before you became ill." "Before... hey, pal." "Hey, j-john." "Truth is, we don'T... know exactly what's going to happen to you, but we're willing to try, if you are." "Okay." "Okay." "Okay, well, that settles it, then." "No, it doesn'T." "Rodney, they haven't told you everything." "He doesn't need to know." "The planet they want to take you to is a wraith outpost." "You remember who the wraith are?" "It means going will be very, very dangerous, not just for you, but for your friends." "We're willing to take that risk." "A risk for which, and I'm sorry-- even if it works, which i very much doubt" "you might revert to your former self for one day." "Now, forgive me if that sounds more like torture than a blessing." "We're still coming up with new ideas on how to treat this thing, but if you do this, if you leave atlantis... atlantis... it's over." "I can't help you." "Doctor... he doesn't understand." "No, he doesn't, which means the decision on whether or not to let him go is mine," "and I haven't given up on trying to cure my patient." "And you still haven't given up." "No, because I don't think the damage to the cells is permanent, which means if I can to safely remove the parasite-- how long have you been at it?" "Weeks?" "And how many days does he have left?" "Two at most?" "Look, I know you've done everything you can." "I know you feel responsible, and you want to keep trying, but..." "I'm his next of kin." "That makes the decision mine." "And we're taking him." "It's recording." "Well, aren't you supposed to say, "action" or something?" "Oh, sorry." "I'm kidding." "Okay, here we go." "My name is Dr.Rodney mckay." "I am head of the science and research departments here in atlantis, in the pegasus galaxy, in the local cluster, in the universe as we know it." "The purpose of this log is to provide a baseline for myself, and for Dr.Keller, to monitor the progress of my, um... memory loss." "Ironic, isn't it?" "By reciting the aforementioned, as well as a list of things I know like the back of my hand, starting with pi, to, say, 12 decimals." "3.1415926535... rodney on board?" "Yes." "Are we clear on the rules of engagement?" "We'll get in and get out before the wraith even know it." "Colonel sheppard, if in fact Dr.Mckay does regain his... say goodbye for me." "I thought you didn't believe." "Is that a prerequisite?" "He'll be glad you're here." "All right, we're either going to get away with this, or we're not." "If we don't, the ride's going to wild, and it's is going to be fast, so I need everyone prepared." "Jumper three, standing by." "Send the malp through." "The malp is clear of the gate, and they're firing on it from both sides of what appears to be a deep valley." "It's deploying smoke." "You should have complete coverage of the area in five seconds." "Okay, see you tomorrow." "I hope so." "That's one hell of a valley." "Do you think they detected us before we were able to cloak?" "No, I think the smokescreen worked." "Hopefully they think we just sent a malp through ahead of us and changed our mind when they blew it up." "All right, I'm going to do a sweep of the landing area." "Shouldn't take more than a few minutes." "John, john!" "John!" "John!" "John!" "You were there, and-and then he-- rodney, rodney, I'm right here." " What's wrong?" " I woke up, everyone had left!" "Oh... buddy, I..." "I'm sorry, I thought you'd fallen asleep." "I was..." "I got so scared, I was sure that... by the morning what was left of my mind was going to be gone!" "I'm going to take you back to your quarters, okay?" "John... john, I've never been so scared." "I'm slipping away." "I'm slipping away, and I don't know how to stop myself!" "Look, you're still here." "All right?" "You're still here." "Yeah." "I am." "And I'm not going anywhere." "You know, you want to hang out, you just... hang out." "I don't know what to do." "I don't know what to do with myself." "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have woken you up." "All right, look, it's a nice night out." "Let's go have some beer on the pier, okay?" "I drink beer?" "A lot." "Take this." "Come on, buddy, let's go." "I don't know, should I have another?" "What could happen?" "I shouldn't have banged on your door like that." "I feel ridiculous." "Don'T." "I've been trying to remember the name of my sister's kid." "Betty. pretty sure that's not it." "It's madison." "See?" "At least you remembered what it wasn'T." "Oh, there's an underrated skill." "I'm just saying you may not be as far gone as you think." "I'm hiding it." "Believe me, I've already forgotten more than most people will ever know, and I know that sounds... arrogant, is that right?" "Yeah." "That works." "This morning I was trying to help zelenka finish a device that was apparently my idea." "I was useless." "Jennifer says it's going to get worse now almost by the hour." "In a week or so, I won't even remember my name." "How's about... how about we say goodbye now?" "No." " What do you mean, no?" " I mean, I'm not saying goodbye." " Well, I'm saying it anyway." " I'm not listening." " Yeah, but pretty soon I won't even know who you are." " Then I'll remind you." "But I don't want you to see me like that." "I want you to remember me as I am, as your genius friend, not as some shell-- not happening." "Please." "You're stuck with me, rodney." "Just accept it." " Yeah, but-- - no!" "That's final." "Okay." "Okay." "You're a good friend, arthur." "All right, landing area's clear." "I'm taking us in." "Where are we going?" "Up there, do you see?" "Behind the waterfall, there is a cave, and when we get there, you will spend a wonderful day with your friends." "I'm tired." "I know." "We'll be there soon." "So... what do we do?" "We wait." "Rodney... look at the waterfall." "It's cool, huh?" "No" "I'm getting very faint energy readings." "What kind of energy readings?" "I'm not sure." "Look at this." "Radiation?" "Not that I've ever seen." "Maybe we can ask rodney in a minute." "John!" "Just hang in there, buddy." "I want to go home now!" "Perhaps he should stand closer to this tablet." "I" " I don't know." "I think that's the source of these energy readings." "I want to go now!" " A little bit longer." " Go now!" "Jeannie?" "I'm here, mere." "Yeah, obviously." "He's back." "Somebody please tell me what the hell we're all doing here?" "Rodney mckay." "I'm head of science... and... and... research." "It's okay." "No, it is not." "Atlantis... pegasus... it's 3.1...4..." "I don't know." "How can I not know that?" "Do you want to stop?" "I keep seeing a face." "Every time I close my eyes." "I think it's my mother." "I don't" " I don'T... r-recognize her... it's so long ago." "She's saying words to me..." "I don't know them." "Well, you can start with, what is this place?" "It's the shrine of talus." "That means nothing to me." "It's a planet of the ancestors." "We brought you here." "Thank you, Mr.Information." "Since when did he become ronon the explainer, and why am I not in the infirmary, huh?" "What am I, better?" "I am better!" "No, you're not." "I am." "I can feel it." "This is amazing!" "Mere, we brought you here so we could have a chance to say goodbye to each other, but you're only going to feel like this for about a day." " That's just how it works." " Whoa, whoa, whoa." "What?" "What do you remember?" "I remember you not wanting me to say goodbye then." "Why now all of a sudden?" "Look, and why one day?" "What's with that?" "It is a gift of the shrine, and from all of us who risked great danger to bring you here, one last chance to be with those you love." "And then what?" "I die?" "With honor." "And dignity." "Screw that, I'll just stay here." "Doesn't work that way." "Why not?" "One, this is a wraith-controlled planet." "And we're detecting ionizing radiation." "In fact, we shouldn't be standing this close to the-- you've got to be kidding me." "How could you let them do this to me?" "Don't blame her." "She didn't even want to do this." "Then whose brilliant idea was it?" "Mine." "We all thought it was a good thing-- how could this possibly be a good thing?" "Look, I'd got past the humiliation, I've said my goodbyes." "Meredith, I'm sorry this happened to you, but I'm not sorry that I got this chance." "Please, just... try to see this as an opportunity and not-- not torture?" "Look, I'm sorry, I just..." "I thought I was going to be okay, and then now you tell me... did you have some kind of itinerary planned?" "Well, actually, we're going to have a big feast first." "Last supper, huh?" "Well, suits your messiah complex." "True." "Please don't be mad at me." "I guess if I had to choose the people I would spend my last day with, then..." "What is it?" "Honestly, I didn't expect it to work." "I expected nothing would happen, and that would be that." "So why did it?" "You don't believe in magic shrines any more than I do." "Show him the readings." "That's what I said." "You said "hmm"?" "I just meant that I thought it was weird, too." "So what do you think, antimatter?" "Or a superheavy element the ancients used to use as an energy source." "I've never seen it before-- or created to power whatever this place used to be." "Who could tell what that is?" "Must be thousands of years" "Whoa," " see that spike?" " Come on, this is your party." "Let's have some fun." "For me, this is fun." "Just... save me some ham." "Whoa, there it goes again." "It's like some kind of intermittent gamma that's-  come with me." " What?" "Why?" "Because I need to find out something." " Where are we going?" " Fuhoallly I the way back to atlantis." "Sorry... why did you do that?" "To determine whether the parasite would expand rapidly back into his brain when we took him from the radiation source, and I think it did." "The reashy w his symptoms disappeared when we came here was because it contracted to protect itself." "All right, well, what does that mean for us?" "That leaving this chamber will probably kill him." "We can't take him back to atlantis." "So... we're going to have to find a way a way for me to operate on him right here." "I thought you already tried radiation." "Well, I did, but we'd never come across this kind before." "The parasite is radiosensitive to it." "That's why the shrine works." "You feel fine for one day until the radiation starts making you feel sick, and you leave." "The farther away you get, the more rapidly the parasite expands back into the brain." "And your day is over." "I get it." "So, if we're here, it's small enough to operate?" "Well, I'm guessing here, but it's the only thing I can think of that would explain his sudden remission, but I'm not going to know for certain until I get in there." "How are you going to manage that with a field kit?" "I don'T." "We would have to bring equipment back from atlantis." "Well, that's a problem." "What if we radio atlantis, ask them to send a jumper through with what I need?" "No, we can'T." "I need that equipment, john." "the wraith are never going to fall for the same trick twice." "Even if somehow they don't pick up on our radio signal, and even if the second jumper makes it through the gauntlet, they'll know we're here." "We'll never make it back to atlantis." "If we don't try, he's dead." "What do you need?" "To operate?" "I already told you." "No, bare minimum, what do you need?" "More than I have in my medical kit." "I mean, I need a scanner to find out the location of the parasite," "I need the proper tools to cut his skull open-- all right." "I've got A.Idea keep him as far away from this thg as he can stand." "We'll be back in 20 minutes." "You can't expect me to operate with those." "Well, I've seen surgical drills." "They're not that much different." "F-fine, assuming we can open him up, I still have no way of knowing where the parasite has contracted to." "We can use this." "A lifesigns detector?" "Yeah." "Why not?" "Well, it's just not designed to do what I need it to do on the correct scale." "Oh, we'll have jeannie modify it." "No." "You don't understand." "The radiation is compromising his immune system as we speak, which means if I don't kill him, the infection he's bound to get by being operated on in a damp cave almost certainly will!" "Look, if we don't do something, he's dead." "You said it." "Absolutely not!" "We're talking about saving your life." "Look, my brain is not some new deck off the back of your house." "I'm not the one doing the surgery." "S,ye and as my parting advice, you need to stop letting these guys talk you into doing stupid things." "I can do it." "Really?" "And I'm fairly sure I can modify the lifesigns detector." "Yeah, with my help... so help." "This isn't one of those pbs brain surgeries where my skull is wide open, and we're having a conversation..." "I have enough anesthetic to put you out." "You're not going to feel a thing." "Yeah, it's probably a hammer." "Time is of the essence, rodney." "You need to make a decision." "Please, mere." "Let us try." "Look, obviously I'd get around to consenting." "It's just-- you've thrown an awful lot at me all at once." "That's life." "All right, well, let me have a little ham." "No." "No food before surgery." "Bye, jeannie." "Sorry I'm mean sometimes." "Bye, teyla." "Bye, ronon dex." "Bye, john." "I'm going to have to cut here... here... and here, and drill those points to resect the area." "Okay." "I don't want to penetrate the dura layers until we get to that stage, so hold him as still as you can." "Go." "I took too long reconfiguring the lifesigns detector." "I haven't given her enough time to perform the surgery before his immune system is compromised." "Dammit, I went too far." "Hold him steady." "I'm trying." "It's the parasite... it's moving." "Well, maybe it knows we're going after it." "I don't think so." "I think it instinctually wants to get away from the radiation source, and we've just shown it the way out." "Ronon, we're going to need that gun of yours in about 10 seconds." "You could have stepped on it." "She told me to shoot it." "It's clear." "You did a good job." "You too." "Let's get him home." "Why don't you go get some sleep?" "I'm going to be here all night." "It's okay." "I'd like to be here when he wakes up." "Well, it could be a while." "He does love to sleep, our rodney." "You should've seen him when he was a teenager." "Who can sleep with all the talking?" "Hi." "Hi." "You still, uh, all there?" "Well, there was so much to spare." "Thank you." "You're welcome." "That was scary." "For me too." "Are you hungry?" "Peckish." "I'll go order you something." "Jennifer, there's something I wanted to... while I remember, while I still can, there's something I wanted to say before, uh... go ahead." "I, uh..." "I love you." "Loved you for some time now." "Okay where was I..." "Stargate Atlantis Season 05 Episode 06"