"I love red meat, actually." "And sports." "Both... are wicked neat." "Yeah?" "Who are your teams?" "Well." "Dodgers." "And..." "And... uh... uh..." "I... can't say I think too much of any others." "I don't know about you, Vic, but between the stove and the chef here, it's gettin' a little..." "Know what I mean?" "Wow!" "Damn!" "Ladies and gentlemen, Brady Kelly is bulked up and Hulkin' out." "Someone make you angry, Dr. Banner?" "Nah, there's no "Situation" here. "Contingency" maybe, but..." "Shoddy Chinese stitching." "I keep telling him to buy American." "What's that?" "He..." "It's time for a commercial break." "Yes, well." "Stay glued, folks." "When we return," "Cheeks uses Brady's washboard and shows you all their dirty laundry." "We're out." "Give us a sec to fix this." " Please don't." " Please don't." " What's with the abs?" " What's with the voice?" " I was trying to..." " I decided you were..." " Okay, look..." " We're both trying..." "Look..." "Clearly." "We switched pages." "So we are still not on the same page." "Okay?" "We are not aligned." "We're not justified." "We're not even the same font." "You know what?" "I don't want to be in this any more." "Aaaand, we're back!" "Now that I've... got you alone..." "I have a question." "How did two people who are so different... even get together?" "I..." "I was in a coffee shop." "A gay coffee shop." "Reg..." "Just regular." "Cheeks was with friends, holding court, of course." "And... you know, I'd seen him on TV before... but, in person he was just so... well he sitting was by the window, and the sun was giving him, just... full on halo." "It was beautiful." "And when he got up to walk away... it was like the halo was following him." "And I realized... it wasn't the sun." "It was him." "Aww." "Aww." "Ahhhhhhh!" "Just like that." "Halo Cheeks, goodbye heart?" "Yeah, yeah!" "Yeah." "I loved him..." "Immediately." "I never heard that story." "Welcome back, Cheeks." "So, you must've been blown away by this handsome ballplayer." "He was alright." "But I... realized, that he was... kind." "And solid." "He listens." "Opposites attract." "Brady cares... so much about me that... well, he tried to be me." "And I don't... want you to be anyone other than yourself." "Which is all I've ever wanted for you... or for me... for everybody." "And all that stuff you said just now..." "Well, I don't..." "I've never really gotten the... all "family values" thing." "But that... was you... valuing me." "And we're family now." "I mean, you're not Superman or anything." "You're a real hero." "But funny enough." "These are actually his glasses... and check it out..." "Clark Kent, right?" "I mean..." " O..." " M..." "Jesus, I'm going to kill "em." "You realize that just went out live?" "Zhoom." "Train wreck." "Beautiful profitable train wreck." "Really?" " It was good?" " The Billion Moms are still furious, but turns out, there's only nine of them." "Plus, the Dodgers stood behind you." "Best part?" "The infamous Instagram photo brought them a knockin' and I got you an endorsement deal." " Thanks to Cheeks." " Any time!" "I know a gold mine when I see one and this untapped market for gay PDA..." "Uh, let's call it PD-Gay!" "Hey, Wes?" "Tell you what." "You go do your job." "I'll go do my husband." "'Night!" "Look at us!" "It all worked out." "Just like the end of Grease!" "Yeah!" "Except I'm slutty Olivia Newton John who tried to be Sandra Dee, but couldn't, so I went back to being slutty." "And you, John Travolta... learned that love means never having to chan..." "There's probably a better movie of what we're like." "Yeah." "Cause you being you is why you're the one that I want." "Oh." "Voyuertunity." "Neighbors could see." "Let me close the blinds" "Let 'em get used to it." "Hmmm..." "Hmmm..." "Ohhh..." "Oh, pizza!" "I love you so much!" "Ti amo così tanto." "You know why I love you?" "Because you're bad for me." "So bad..." "And it's not the saturated fats... it's not the calories..." "You know what is bad?" "So very, very bad about you?" "You're tied to the mafia, but I love you anyway." "I love your ^CHK gang-land ties?" "You don't do the killing yourself, your hands are clean." "Make me you mob-woman, pizza!" "Ohhh..." "Oh, the remorse." "Il... rimorso." "Ahhh..."