"My father worked as a lawyer for the richest family in New York, until his plane went down in Long Island Sound." "He left me his biggest client, the Darlings." "Tripp, the empire builder." "So, you knew about the affair between Letitia and my father?" "Of course." "Letitia, the sophisticated socialite." "Patrick, the principled politician." " I don't want to run for Senate." " I think that you should run." "What do you want to do?" "Karen, the professional divorcée." "Nick is my past." "You're my future, okay?" "Brian, the man of God." "I lied to my wife and daughters last night." "I told them that you were an orphan." " Does he speak English?" " No, just Swedish." "And Jeremy and Juliet, the well-behaved twins." "Don't lie to me, Jeremy, especially about Natalie Kimpton." "I want you." " If Juliet found out..." " She won't find out." "My father was gathering information on billionaire Simon Elder." "If I were trying to figure out who had killed my father, that's the guy I'd start with." "You have to eat good food." "I'm putting the carrots in your lunch." "Oh, Dad." "Yuck!" "I mean, they taste like toenails." "How do you know what toenails taste like?" "That's not right." "Why is Patrick Darling on TV?" "Because he is running for the United States Senate." "So you're willing to go on record that you have never committed adultery?" "Ever since I got married, I've done nothing, Lara, but be faithful to my wife and try to set a fine moral example for my children and all the people of New York." "So, Patrick's really running?" "Tripp got what he wanted." "He usually does." "You know, I think he'll make a great senator." "Okay, I think that's enough TV." "Why don't you go get your book report and finish getting ready for school?" "Okay." "Are you sure going to the police about Simon Elder is a safe thing to do?" "Don't you think you might need a little more evidence before accusing the richest man in the world of being a murderer?" "Look, Lisa, the evidence I have is the evidence I have." "What do you want me to do?" "Just wait and see?" "I can't." "You can ask Tripp for help." "You agreed to represent the family." "It's the least he can do." "Yes, but can I trust him?" "Maybe." "So, being Tripp Darling's trusted advisor doesn't have a whole lot to do with trust, does it?" "Until I find out who killed my dad, no." " Morning, Clark." " Good morning, Mr. George." "So, what?" "Tripp thinks if he sends the Rolls, I'll take a ride to work?" "Hop in, Nicky." " What, did you just wake up?" " God, no." "I haven't slept a wink." "What's the matter?" "I'm tormented by the thought that Simon Elder could've had something to do with that plane going down." "We have to do something." " Well, I'm seeing the police later today." " The police?" "I don't think the police will be much help with Simon Elder." "A man in that kind of position, the police can't really..." "I mean, I think he's probably pretty much untouchable." " I could have someone look into it." " No, that's all right, thanks." "Your dad had a private investigator that we used a couple of times..." "Tripp, here's what I think we should do." "I think we should let the police handle the matter, let them decide whether or not there's reason for suspicion." "That's what I think we should do." "Clark, right here, please." "You still think someone in our family could have been responsible?" " I didn't say that." " Personally," "I think the dossier your dad compiled on Simon Elder is pretty damning." "Well..." "And I'm bringing it in to the police later today." "I just have to be able to do it my way." "Please." "Okay." "Look, I'm just going to run home from here." "I'll see you later this morning, okay?" "You take care of yourself, okay?" "Daisy, I need you to go on the Internet and find out all the information you can on Simon Elder." "I want interviews, profiles, corporate reports, anything you can find." " No problem." " I also need you to make one copy of every piece of paper in this dossier." " I have to bring it to the police later." " No problem." "And I don't want to be bothered by anyone for at least the next hour." "Problem." "Rebecca Colfax, Darling family publicist." "Well, I'm charmed all over again." " Rebecca Colfax is here for you." " Yeah, I see." "Thanks, Daisy." " What's up?" " This." "The call came into my office at 2:00 a. m." "For Tripp." "Why is Tripp getting calls at your office?" "Guess they didn't have his home number." "What a surprise." "Listen up." "Hey, Mr. Darling." "Just thought you might want to know." "There's a pretty raunchy sex tape gonna hit the web at midnight Thursday if you don't pay me 1 million American, you tall poppy." "That's right, one bloody mill." "Oi, turn it down, Rach!" "Wouldn't be too good for your little Paddy's Senate campaign, now, would it?" "Wait to hear from me." "I've got you by the nutties now, mate." " Hmm." " Uh..." "So, wait..." "Have you told Tripp about this yet?" " Not yet." " Good, don't." " Did you contact the police?" " I'm contacting you." "Until this thing becomes a matter of public record, which it won't if you do your job, it's a legal problem." "It's not an after-school spin project." "Besides, Patrick's campaign launch is tomorrow night, and, between the good press and the bad press," "I'm kind of up to my knees in freaks." "Yeah." "Well, let's just think for a second." "Do we even know that this tape actually exists?" "Think about it." "Patrick Darling." "I'll talk to him." "Patrick." "I saw your little performance on Lara Cumberland." "Come on, son." "You can't spend your whole campaign fielding questions about..." "What do you call it?" "I mean, it's going to come out, this sex thing." "I tried to talk policy, Dad." " She pushed." " Yeah, and somebody's gonna shove." "What do you think I should do?" " I'm sure you have a detailed plan." " Patrick." "You can do great things if we can win this election." "Great things." "You have to get your house in order." "You have to let this person go." "Right." "Thanks." "Juliet Darling, is it true you got banned from the Argyle for starting a fire?" " That was an accident!" " Isn't this really about Natalie Kimpton?" "You hate each other so much, you can't even stay in the same hotel?" " Is that what she said?" " Oh, no." "She said you're "a small-minded fashion victim. " End quote." "Do you have a comment to that?" "Juliet!" "I have never wanted anything but good things for Natalie." "I wish her success and happiness." "Peace out!" "Bring the boys home!" "Hey, Jeremy," " you know what would be so random?" " Hmm?" "Me going to Patrick's bash." "No." "You and Jules at the same party can never happen, ever." "If she even suspects we're seeing each other..." "But, Jeremy, there's a diamond necklace there that I would kill for, and people get to take whatever they want, right?" " I'll buy you the necklace." " No." "I don't want you to buy it, I want it for free." " Paying for stuff sucks." " Natalie, no." "You got my sister thrown out of the hotel." " I did not!" " I saw you talking to the manager." "It was about my smoothies." "They were putting in way too much banana." "You don't seem to mind when I put in too much banana." "So, I hate to ask you this, but you've never filmed yourself performing a sexual act, ever," " with Ellen or anyone?" " No." " Not with Carmelita?" " Nick, what part of "no" do you not understand?" " Just be completely honest with me." " I'm being completely honest with you." "I never made any sex tape, I mean..." "Quite frankly, I don't find them to be very romantic." "Okay." "Well, do you think it's possible that somebody could have filmed you without your knowledge, for..." "Nick, did anyone ever say that it was actually me on the tape?" "Did someone ever..." "Did they say that?" "No." "We just assumed that..." "There it is, Nick." "You assume, you make an ass out of you and me." "That one's for free." " Don't go, I just got home." " I have to." "I've got to go to Russian." " Don't you mean Russia?" " No." "I started taking Russian for the space tourism program." "Oh." "I have to know what it means if they say..." " What does that mean?" " "Open the airlock, Ivan. "" "Catherine?" "Can I please be done unpacking?" "Thank you." "What's going on with you lately?" "What?" "Nothing." "I'm sensing some sort of weird vibe." "You know how my twintuition gets really good a month before our birthday?" " There's no such thing as twintuition." " Yes, there is, and you know it." "Like the time you fell into the well at Elton John's estate and I knew, or when you broke your wrist at tennis camp and I knew." "I called you from my cell phone." "Yeah, but I knew you were going to call." "So, you think Simon Elder, the billionaire philanthropist," " blew up your father's plane?" " I'm exploring the possibility." "This guy who loves everybody, and stamps out hunger, and AIDS, and everything, had it in for your dear old dad?" "Do you know where I might find Angelina Adams?" "She was the detective that I spoke with at the crash site." "She got transferred." "So, what was his motive, you think?" " Did your father even know Mr. Elder?" " I'm not sure." "I'm just asking if you can look and see if there's a possible connection." "Look, all of this was in my father's briefcase." "There's evidence here that Elder's application for" "Alien Employment Certification was tampered with when he entered the country from Russia, back in 1979." "And here, on his Information Disclosure Statement, which he signed when he patented his Prism Processor, he failed to disclose prior art." "Do you know what that means?" "It could have been someone else's idea?" "It could be he stole someone else's idea, and my father knew about it." "You know what, Mr. George?" "Can I keep this for a day?" " Yeah, sure." " I'll have our people look them over," " and we'll get back to you." " I mean, look, it may mean nothing." "It may." "You never know." "It may." "I'll call you tomorrow." " Hey, Daisy, I'll be there in ten..." " Rebecca Colfax, family publicist." "Do you ever get tired of saying that?" "Our Aussie friend just sent me an e-mail outlining his requirements." "He wants the money hand-delivered, 5:00 p. m." "Tomorrow, Pier 21." "Exactly one hour before the campaign launch at Bulgari." "And we know the tape exists now, Einstein." "There was an audio file attached to the e-mail." "You have a recording of the sex tape, huh?" "Yeah." "It's pretty rough, but you can definitely hear someone say, "Paddy. "" "And it sounds about 50%/º like a dude." " Well, I've spoken with Patrick." " And?" "He claims he never made a sex tape, says they're not romantic." "Let me let you in on a little secret about the Darlings, Nick." "They lie." "So, I'm just asking you to be honest with me." "Have you ever made a sex tape?" "Nick," "I tell you this with, um..." "With a great sorrow, but the only sex tapes I ever had are the ones in my collection." " But you've never made a sex tape?" " You mean, like, a mix tape?" "Like the one you made me when we were 12?" "The one with Babe, I Love You on it." "Babe, I love you" "No, Karen." "A sex tape." " That's impossible." " What do you mean, impossible?" "Just that." " It is not possible." " Okay." "So you had a collection of sex tapes?" "Yeah, but they were not of me, they were of, like, celebrities." "Remember?" "Babe, I love you" "Nick, if I tell you something, do you promise not to tell anybody?" " You have a sex tape of Buddy Ebsen?" " Had." "It's probably Juliet." "I'm a virgin." "Wow." "That's a surprise." " A real, total virgin?" " Yeah." "I've never even..." "Well, anything." " Juliet, why do you..." " Let everyone think I'm a slut?" " Yeah." " It's easier." "Okay, just to be sure, not even any kissing, or touching, or heavy petting, while a camera was on?" "How do you live with yourself?" " They all said no." " Told you." "Patrick made the sex tape," "Patrick's a liar, and Patrick's going to be the next lying President of the United States of Lying America." ""Birds roost with their own kind, so honesty" ""will come home to those who practice it. "" " Amen." " Amen." " You speak English?" " No, he doesn't." "Not a word." "He saw me reading the Bible, and "Amen" is the same in Sweden." "Amen, right?" " Amen." " Amen." "See, it's the same in Sweden." "Honey, I'm as sorry about this as you are." "I feel like a piece of trash." " You are not a piece of trash." " I know." " You just make me feel like one." " Me?" " You're the one that told me to run." " Yeah, but I didn't..." "I didn't think you'd break up with me." "I thought they were two totally different issues." "Obviously they're not." " Wait, don't..." "Please don't go, stay." " I can't." "Can't we just have one last nice time?" "We already did, we just didn't know it." " Hey, Rebecca Colfax, family publicist." " We know." "Once we set your meeting with our Aussie slime, he sent the dinky-di." ""Dinky-di"?" "It's Aussie for "the real thing. "" "Goes public day after tomorrow unless we come up with the moolah." "That means "money. "" "It's showtime, folks." "What the hell are they doing?" "The Italian Banker." "How do you know that?" "The reverse Italian Banker." "Well, I hate to say it, but I guess you were right about the lying." "Good thing it's not Patrick." "It's good for him, but it's the same for the campaign." "The Darling family name is still the Darling family name." "We've still got to pay." "Oh, my God!" "Just turn it off!" " Any luck with the police?" " Yeah." "Provisionally, actually." "They're going to look into it." "You showed them the documents that were in your dad's briefcase?" "I did." "They're going to look them over." " The originals?" " No, of course not." "Copies." "Good." "Well, I mean, it's a surprise, but it's a good one." "I'm pleased." "You still don't believe, do you, that I had nothing to do with this?" "Honestly?" "I'm not sure." " Secretary of State for you, sir." " Thank you, Helen." "Your dad was my roommate at Yale." "He was my best friend, ever." " Tripp, don't you need to get that?" " In a second." "He was the first person I hired when my dad put me in charge of the family." "He saved me from certain death twice." "Once in the Mentawai Islands, and once when we were up in Saskatchewan, hunting moose." "I took a stray bullet in the leg." "He carried me on his back six-and-a-half miles to the lodge." "There's no way that I would have wanted him dead." "Not even knowing he had an affair with your wife for 40 years?" "I didn't know." "You're going to have to start trusting me sometime, or this is not going to work." "Tripp Darling." "Hey, Condi." "No, I had the occasion to hear your cousin, Constance, speak." "What clarity of vision." "What an extraordinary family you have, Madam Secretary..." " It is your sister again." " Can you grab it for me?" "She'll just keep calling if you don't." "Jeremy, you're a very handsome, very cool guy." "You don't need your sister 24 hours a day." "Disconnect." "The last time we did it, you talked to Lilo the whole time." "That was different." "She was bombed." " Hey, Sis." " I've left, like, three messages." "I'm sorry, I've been kind of tied up." "What are you doing?" "I'm chilling with some freaks." "What should I wear tonight, to the campaign launch?" "A burnoose or something." "Shake it up." "Jeremy, are you even listening to me?" " Jeremy?" " Yeah, I'm listening!" " Fine, whatever, perf, bye." " Bye." "This is not going to end well." "So, all right, I made a sex tape." "It's not like it's against the law." "Well, I'm not saying it's against the law, Karen." "It's just you..." "You lied to me." "Oh..." " I hurt your feelings." " No, Karen." "Oh, I'm sorry, Nick." "I won't do that again." " Who's the guy?" " Why?" " You a little jealous?" "Just a little bit?" " Karen." "Look, Karen, I'm just trying to figure out a way to get around shelling out $ 1 million for this thing." "That's it." " Okay, it's Freddy's caddy." " What?" " It's Freddy's caddy." " Freddy's caddy?" " Oh, well, that explains that." " Explains what?" ""Caddy. " "Paddy. " Nothing." "Nothing." "Okay, I just..." "I need you to promise me that he won't find out about this." " Freddy?" " No, Daddy." "He doesn't know it's me on the tape, right?" " He doesn't know there's a tape." " So you lied for me?" " Yeah, I omitted a few things." " Nick." "Thank you." "You are so sweet." "All right, here's what you need to do." "Go to the Bowery branch of Fortunato Brothers and ask for Paulo Vova." "Paulo Vova." "And he's just going to give me $ 1 million?" " He's never met me." " Well, Nick, if I go in and ask him for money to pay off a blackmailer for a sex tape, he's just going to go and tell Daddy." "Like he did last time." "I really appreciate this." "I know it's short notice." "Not at all, Mr. George." "This is why we're here." "I was very sorry, by the way, to hear about your father." "We were friends." "He was..." "He was a good man." "Thank you." "All of this money belongs to the Darlings?" "And they have vaults like this all over the city." " Do I need to tell you why..." " No, no." "It's none of my business, Mr. George." "I never asked your father, I will never ask you." "Thank you, Paulo." "Mr. Vova, please." "I'm a banker." "An Italian banker." "Yes, I'm very familiar with the sexual position." "It was named for my grandfather." "Okay?" "Enough." "Thanks, Steven." "Do you know how much love I've given up to be in this family?" "To be who my dad wants me to be?" "How much love and simple affection?" "Sweet nectar." "Mr. Darling, you have a speech to make in less than an hour." "Enough love for 10 lifetimes!" "Two more Potcheens, Steven." "Funny thing is, I'm not allowed to be loved for who I really am." "Poor people, nobodies, regular beings that only God sees, they can be loved for who they are, but not me." " Because, you know why?" " We should really go, sir." "Because I am a scion." "I'm a Darling twig!" "A tender shoot that's stuck to a tree that I cannot live without." "So, here's to the tree." "Here's to the tree, Clark." "Here's to the tree that's killing me." " Come on." "Let's go, Mr. Darling." " Okay." "I'm going to drive, though." "I'm at least going to be in control of that!" "Sir, sir..." "Come on." "Hey." " Are you Mr. George?" " Yeah." " Where's your boyfriend?" " Something came up, so he sent me." "All right, fine, whatever." "Where's the tape?" "I'm sorry, this is really awkward." " What the hell is going on?" " We can't sell you the tape." "What do you mean, you can't sell me the tape?" " We don't have it no more." " You've got to be kidding me." "I just went and got $ 1 million." "I have $ 1 million in this bag." "I know!" "Look, maybe we could go and get a cup of tea or something..." "No, we can't go get a cup of tea!" "I'm in a hurry," "I have to be at a police station in 10 minutes." " What, about this?" " No, about something else entirely." "So if you're playing some kind of game with me..." "I'm not!" "We feel really bloody awful about this, Mr. George!" "This is not how we do business." "It's just that we got a much bigger offer." "From who?" "Who'd you sell this tape to?" "I don't know!" "We never even met them." "We just got a phone call out of the blue, giving us instructions, put the tape into a postbox, and that was that." "God help me." "Well, I hope this doesn't affect any future business" " that we might do, Mr. George." " Oh, I'm sure it won't." "No, it's all good." "That's it?" "You're done?" "We looked at the materials, Mr. George, and there's nothing in there that really incriminates Simon Elder." "And you did all of this in one day." "Look, you said yourself that this stuff from your father's briefcase may not mean anything, and your instincts were right on the money." "Did Detective Adams get transferred off this case because she was willing to look into things that you're obviously being paid not to?" "Detective Adams followed her actor boyfriend to Los Angeles." "What are you gonna do?" "Women." " Hello?" " Mr. George." " Yeah." " It's Clark, the driver." "Hey, Clark, what's up?" "I'm up here at 86th and 2nd Avenue." "Yeah, what's the problem?" "I've got Patrick up here." "He's, uh..." "I'm not going, Nicky." "I won't go." "He's in a bit of a state." "Tell him I'm not going!" "I'll be there as soon as I can." "I'm standing here live in front of the new Bulgari retail store in Manhattan, which opens its doors to the public tomorrow." "But tonight, it will play host to Patrick Darling's campaign launch and fundraiser." "An unconventional way to fund a run for Senate, but could we really expect anything less from a Darling?" "That's right, New York's elite have turned out for this amazing event tonight and..." "Oh, hold on, this could be Patrick now." "Hey, there's his wife." "Hey, Ellen!" " Ellen, Ellen, where's the candidate?" " Oh, he'll be here shortly." "He's just putting some last touches on his speech." "Thank you." "Juliet!" "Right here!" "Juliet, how do you feel about your brother running for the Senate?" " He is the best!" " He rocks my Casbah!" "Oh, my God!" " Oh, my God." " What is she doing here?" "She must be a supporter." "Natalie Kimpton, does your appearance at Patrick Darling's fundraiser mean that you and Juliet have made up?" "When she's ready to apologize, I'm ready to listen." "This is so utterly debasing." "We have to get her off the list!" " She's already on the red carpet, Jules." " God!" " I want to go home." " No, no, look, it's a big store, it's a big store." "You won't even see her, okay?" "Trust me." "Go, Patrick." " Thanks for not taking him in." " No problem." "I used to do the same thing for your dad." "Helps keep the press out of the picture." "Patrick." "Nick, how you doing?" "You were supposed to be at Bulgari 20 minutes ago." "You're giving a speech 10 minutes from now." "Oh, no, I'm not." " Patrick..." " I can't do it without her." "I'm really sorry about this, guys, but I'm going to have to take someone in." "Too many witnesses." " I got it." " What are you doing, Clark?" "Standard procedure, I'll be fine." "How the hell are we going to get you to this fundraiser in seven minutes?" "We'll get you there, Mr. George." "Do you know what Carmelita did for me once?" "I don't think I want to hear." "She made me 30 pairs of underwear with my favorite Yankees on the butt." "Thurman, Reggie, Yogi." "That's love." "What kind of a jerk throws that away?" "All right, Pat, listen." "You've got to pull yourself together." "Don't you tell me to pull myself together, Nick." "Because that's what my dad always says." ""Pull yourself together, Pat, pull yourself together, Pat. "" "All right, I'm sorry." "I mean, that's why your dad was so cool." "He never told anybody to pull themselves together." "He would say, "Let yourself go. "" "You know, I love that." "It's so exhausting, Nick." "I'm always disappointing him." "I mean, I can't even imagine what it's like to just be yourself." "To just do something, and have your dad say, you know, "Great job." ""You, you, you're good. "" "It's great, right?" "It's a great feeling?" "Yeah, I guess." "Dutch was so proud of you, Nick, you must know that, right?" "I know he was proud of me." "I didn't give him very many opportunities to say it." "Does anybody get life right?" "I don't know." "I just know that, no matter what, tomorrow is another day, another opportunity, another chance." "I like that." " He speaks English." " Who?" "The orphan." "Gustav." " Complimentary watch?" " And very well, not just "Amen. "" "No, thank you." "Wait." "Thanks." "Well, what did he say?" "He said to the twins," ""How come the sponge eats burgers underwater" ""and the buns don't get soggy?"" "Really?" "That lying little street urchin." " Who knows if he's even an orphan?" " I'm gonna talk to him." "And I'm gonna find out." "This really cheeses me off." " What do you think of these?" " Transplendent." " Wait, what about these?" " Even better." "Maximum." "You don't think they're too big?" "You look a little like a fly, but that's not all bad." "Bugs are cool." " I can't focus." " Maybe they're prescription." "Having Natalie here is driving me insane." "I'm getting shingles!" "You just go ahead and you forget about her." "I can't." "Not with every third yahoo in here coming up to me, making sure I know she's here." "Throw her out." "I can't." "It's not my place." " You like her." " Ow!" "Is this the whole twintuition thing?" "Because I think that you are being kind of jammed." "I don't need twintuition to see you googling her ass!" " Wait, don't you mean "ogling"?" " Whatever!" "I'm going to throw it out!" "You can't just kick me out because of some stupid perfume!" " Oh, well, it's not about the perfume!" " So what, then?" "So it's true!" "Darling Natalie was intended as a joint release?" " No!" " No!" "No!" "I always knew it was going to be Daring Natalie," " and then she was like..." " Oh, right!" ""Put in the 'L'!" "Put in the 'L'!"" "That is such a lie!" "It was supposed to celebrate our friendship!" "Get her off of me!" "She's feral!" "I don't even care about your stupid perfume." "You stole my bangs, and I'll never forgive you!" "Oh, my God!" " Bangs?" "It's all about bangs?" " Who had the bangs first?" "You can't even pull off bangs anyway." "Look at your face!" "That's enough." "Settle down, both of you!" "She started it!" "Whore!" " You did!" "Hey, you shut up." "You do not crash my brother's party and act like such a selfish freak." "It's not cool." "Oh, my God." "The police." "As long as he's here." "Good evening." "I hope I'm not too late to talk about the future of the greatest city in America." "So, what did I miss?" "To all the new families that arrive at this city every single day from places like the Dominican Republic, and Russia, China, Jamaica, my message remains the same." "Tomorrow is another day, another opportunity, another chance at the American dream." "So, I thank you very much, thank you for coming, and God bless America." "He's perfect." "Let's go for air." "Hey, Karen?" "Karen, I'm sorry to bother you guys, but can we talk?" "Yeah, about what?" "Oh, we're going to get sushi, you can just come and join..." "No, no, no." "It's about the thing." " The sex tape?" " Yeah." "What, you told him?" "She told you?" "Well, I'm giving her a mulligan." "Wow, that's generous." "Well, see, now that's the difference between you and me, Nick." "I realize that nobody's perfect." "You, you're still trying." "Karen, someone else bought the tape." " Who?" " I don't know." "But it's going to be all over the Internet tomorrow." "I'm sorry, I did everything I could." "Baby, don't worry about it." "You'll survive." "I know, but Daddy..." "Well, look, if you want me to, I'll tell him." " Would you?" " Sure." "You're the best." "Oh, um..." "Tell him I didn't know there was a camera, okay?" " Okay." " Okay." "Thank you." "I wish we had a pool up here." "That'd be amazing." "Little sore from your fisticuffs?" "Yeah, a little bit." "I think I pulled a muscle." "But it was worth it, because I think I definitely connected a few times." "Yeah?" "She's probably gonna have a shiner." "At least a skinned knee." " Thank you for sticking up for me." " She was out of line." "It's no big thing." "No, it was huge." "It was the best." "I'm sorry that I said I thought you had a thing for her." "Guess my twintuition's off this year." "Maybe as twins get older and grow further apart," " they just get out of sync." " Yeah." "That could happen." "Who's that?" "Take it." "Nah." " This is nice." " Yeah." "Nick." "Nick!" "I just wanted to say thank you." "I could have never given that speech tonight without you." "Well, I'm glad I could help." "And that thing you said about tomorrow being another day, another chance." " Yeah?" " Well, you're right, Nick." "I'm getting back together with Carmelita." " Well, Pat, that's not what I meant." " You're good for a wise word, Nick, but you can't hold me tight." "Well, can you just give it a beat, think it through." "He has thought it through." "What can I tell you?" "It's love." "Let yourself go, Pat." "Thanks, Nick." "I will." "Dude, you're leaving?" "What, you're going back to Vegas?" "Why should I stay here in Traitorville?" "She's my sister." "Really?" "And what am I?" "Some freak you chill with?" " I think you're overreacting." " Really?" " I didn't even get any swag." " Oh, I'm sorry." " I brought you this." " One bag?" "You take her side, and you show up here with one little bag?" "I'm totally messing with you." "How's this for an apology?" "It's a start." " Young lady?" " Yes?" "I just got off the phone with Bulgari, and they wanted to make sure the delivery was okay." "I have no idea what you're talking about." "Apparently, they shipped someone in this family hundreds of thousands of dollars of goods." " Well, it wasn't me." " Well," "I don't know any other J. Darling who would spend that kind of money on jewelry." "Do you?" "No." "Okay." "Thank you." "J. Darling, my foot!" "I can't believe that you would betray us like this after all we've done." "I mean, why would you lie about not being able to speak English?" " You're the one..." " Never mind!" "It doesn't matter." "Do you know how much we've spent at the Swedish market so you could have your precious caviar?" " What's caviar?" " It's not about the caviar!" "It's about the time that we've put in." "I mean, is your name even Gustav?" "Tell me!" "Is it?" "It is, isn't it?" " Huh?" " Good." "Well, at least you were honest about that." "But remember, we pay the rent in this house with honesty." "Don't make me raise your rent." "Do you really believe his name is Gustav?" "What choice do I have?" "You know, at some point, you have to just put your faith in humanity." "I've got to get to Bible study." "You look like the good news is I've got two days to live, and the bad news is you were supposed to tell me yesterday." "That it?" "What, exactly?" "Speak." "The police found something?" "No, they were useless." "You were right." "I don't know if Elder's people got to them, or if they're just too scared to try, but..." "I don't know, you were right." "Are you ready to let me help you?" "You lied to me." "What are you talking about?" "I never lied to you." "When did I lie to you?" "When I opened my father's briefcase with your wife's birth date as the combination, you said you knew about the affair." " That wasn't a lie." " Well, then what the hell was it?" " That was a..." " I asked you if you knew, you said you did, and then you said you didn't." "So which is it?" "What's the truth?" "That was a man trying to save his life." "What do you want me to do?" "Tell you that I'd wasted 40 years trusting the two people I thought were the most important people in the world?" "Is that it?" "Is that your truth?" "I'm sorry." "We'll figure it out." "You help me take care of my family." "We'll figure it out." "We'll find out who killed your father, I promise." "All right." " All right." " Okay." "What's next?" "Well, there's a sex tape involving a family member that's gonna come out on the Internet tomorrow." " Patrick?" " No, Karen." "Mr. George, a second of your time?" " Can I help you?" " Here." "Inside you'll find all copyright documents pertaining to the Karen Darling sex tape, as well as all remaining copies." "The rights have been officially transferred to the Darling family, care of you, Nicholas George, and there are a host of legal assurances attached." "I'm sure you'd approve." "Okay." "You the guy that bought it?" "No." "But my boss did, for $3 million." "Your boss?" "Simon Elder." "Yeah, he's not the man you think he is." "And your boss isn't either." "Everybody knows the dice are loaded" "Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed" "Everybody knows that the war is over" "Everybody knows that the good guys lost" "Everybody knows the deal is rotten" "The poor stay poor and the rich get rich" "That's how it goes" "Everybody knows"