"I was invited to come here with the Quilt, and I just fell in love." "How many have you done?" "Oh!" "One, two, three, four, five, six... seven, eight." "Seven, eight." "Eight panels?" "Right, yeah." "Nine, ten?" "What, in one year?" "Ten panels in one year?" "Ten panels in one year?" "Mm-hmm." "You really fell in love." "Yes, I did." "This is a "G", and it is giving me a handful here." "Feel free to pick up a pair of scissors and cut out a letter." "You know, what is it we're not doing?" "31 years into this epidemic, 31 years into this epidemic, how are we still diagnosing people at alarming rates?" "You know, with all the education, what part are we missing?" "You're gonna fold that in half and cut it in half?" "Yes." "Fantastic..." "that should do it." "Cool." "This is a rainbow flag made by Gilbert Baker." "This is a rainbow flag made by Gilbert Baker." "He sewed the very first rainbow flag, and I actually helped him dye the fabric." "Back then, it had eight bars, which were reduced to six because it was easier to mass-produce." "This is one of my most treasured possessions." "This quilt was made for me before I was born." "This quilt was made for me before I was born by my great-grandmother Irene Rupert." "And she hand-stitched this quilt, which is made up of remnants of my great-grandfather's pajamas." "I remember if I was home from school with a cold or something, my mom or my grandma would bring out this quilt." "So I think at a very early age, a quilt, to me, embodied family love" "Embodied family love" "Love transmitted from generation to the next generation." "And then, of course, the obvious symbolism of a quilt" "Not throwing away anything, that everything is useful." "Here's one of me when I was a hippie." "I like that." "And that's-- that was Phoenix Country Day School." "I did not fit in." "1971, I was in my high school library." "1971, I was in my high school library." "It was during gym class, and I was faking a lung disease so that I wouldn't have to go to the gym because I would get beat up." "And so I would-- Every day during P.E.," "I would go to the library, and read magazines, and try to remember to cough occasionally." "And I was reading "LIFE" magazine, and I flipped the page, and the headline was." ""Homosexuals in Revolt"." "And it was an eight-page spread about the new gay liberation movement and the story of the Stonewall rebellion." "And the story of the Stonewall rebellion." "And I closed the magazine and made sure no one was looking, and stole it, and took it home, and hid it under the mattress like it was pornography." "But that was when I knew that there was a place for me to go." "♪" "When I got to San Francisco, I arrived in the Castro and was part of that gay ghetto there." "And was part of that gay ghetto there." "Let the record show for like eight weeks in the mid '70s, I was smoking hot." "You know, we talked about the gay community back then." "We didn't use the LGBT at that point." "But it was really sort of hypothetical." "So when the epidemic started, my community, my people were devastated." "It was very clear that this was the proving ground," "It was very clear that this was the proving ground, that if we were a community, this was the time to show it." "Several infectious disease physicians were seeing a very unusual pneumonia in young men without any known cause." "Scientists at the National Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta today released the results of a study, which shows that the lifestyle of some male homosexuals has triggered an epidemic of a rare form of cancer." "Has triggered an epidemic of a rare form of cancer." "Researchers know of 413 people who have contracted the condition in the past year." "One-third have died, and none have been cured." "The media only focused on gay men." "And many times, it was considered a scourge or something visited upon them." "We were blamed, and there was so much that was not known about the disease in the beginning that the hysteria could feed on itself." "Federal guidelines now require Red Cross blood banks to ask homosexual men not to give blood." "All my friends were always gay men." "I worked in theatre, I worked-- I sold cosmetics." "I mean, where do you meet more gay men, you know?" "And so, for me, AIDS" "You know, since 1985, it's just been" "And everything else stopped." "♪" "♪" "I spent the '80s in hospitals watching friends dying." "And there was nothing you could do." "And watching-- even the nurses, they were all, put, you know, moon suits on to go in." "And people weren't touching them, and it just" "It just seemed so cruel." "Sitting in a room and have nobody touch you and be afraid, it would be so horrible." "I had a boyfriend, he goes, "How did you know" "I had a boyfriend, he goes, "How did you know you wouldn't get it that way?"" "And I just remember going up to him, and I poked him, and I went, "There, you got it."" "I said, "If you can get it that way, we've all got it."" "We should be ashamed of the way that we treated these people... you know, as a country." "I knew every one of these people, and none of them survived." "Hey-hey, ho-ho." "Homophobia's got to go..." "I was going to protest, and I kept thinking about my grandmothers, who loved me so much." "I was the first-born grandchild." "I don't know what year that is." "My grandmothers aren't going to put on a black leather jacket and storm the NIH, but they would've gladly given their lives," "I believe, to save me." "So I thought, you know, from the beginning," "So I thought, you know, from the beginning, this was something that would" "Would help us cross those boundaries and draw people into the movement." "And that definitely came to me from Harvey Milk." "Harvey really mentored me." "And when he got elected, he took me with him to City Hall." "And I actually found his body after he'd been killed." "And I actually found his body after he'd been killed." "November 27, 1978." "Every year on November 27th in San Francisco, we reenact the candlelight march that occurred the night that Harvey Milk and mayor George Moscone were assassinated." "As people gathered for the candlelight march in November of 1985," "I had stacks of poster board and magic markers, and I had Harvey Milk's old bullhorn that he'd given me." "And I had Harvey Milk's old bullhorn that he'd given me." "And I talked to the crowd, and I said," ""You know, we're here to remember Harvey and George," ""but we've lost a lot more." ""How many of you know someone who has died of this new disease?"" "And everybody had, so I told them, "Write down their names."" "And some of them were ashamed to do it." "There were, you know, "John" or, you know, "BW" or something." "And then, one kid printed out his brother's full name, and underneath it wrote, "My brother, he's dead."" "and underneath it wrote, "My brother, he's dead."" "And other people looked at that and began to become ashamed of their shame, and began to write the first and last names." "And saying this in 2012, you know, it's hard to imagine what a simple act of courage that was, just to name them." "I was walking down to the Castro from Macy's-- I used to work at Macy's" "And I saw this guy, you know, "Write somebody's name down,"" "blah, blah, blah." "So I'm in my heels and stuff." "I said, "You know, I should do this."" "So I went, and I went up to Cleve." "So I went, and I went up to Cleve." ""Here give me one of those," and I wrote up Roger's name, and I walked all the way down Market Street in my heels and my dress, up to the Federal Building." "And we put placards on the Federal Building." "It was a cold, damp night with drizzle, and no speeches, or chanting, or anything like that, just thousands of people standing and whispering," ""I knew him," "I went to school with him,."" ""I didn't know he was sick," "When did he die?" "Nobody told me."" "And I got to the edge of the crowd, and I looked back over the crowd and I looked back over the crowd at all these people standing and looking at that patchwork of names, and I thought to myself" "it looks like some kind of strange quilt." "It-- it was perfect." "And then for the next year and a half, everybody told me it was the dumbest thing they'd ever heard of." "♪" "Sewing comes, like, in spurts, and when it does, it's manic spurts." "It's all chaos here." "I sew them together." "I have the privilege of doing that." "I have touched and probably worked on almost every single one of them at some point." "That I would say is true." "You know, and I've sewn up a lot of them." "I have the arthritic hands to prove it, God knows." "And that's been my job throughout the whole Names Project." "I have done up to 16 hours a day." "All those shelving units are all full of repairs." "All those shelving units are all full of repairs." "Anyway..." "I think I was born for the Names Project because when my mom died when I was really, really young, I didn't know how to sew." "She sewed so beautifully, and so I took her sewing machine, and I taught myself how to sew when I was a little girl." "And I swear, I was" "They were setting me up for this, the way I was just sewing, and how much I loved to sew." "And I wasn't working at sewing, and I got to kinda get in and do that." "I became the type of person I used to hate." "If I saw an activist like me walking down the street," ""Oh, God, you know, they're gonna ask me for money, or gonna tell me to sign up for something,"" "and I became that." "Even my family looked at me, like, "What the Hell?"" "'Cause I quit both my jobs." "I was making a lot of money, and I quit them to go volunteer at this place." "We thought we were gonna save the world." "Hi, I'm Cleve Jones, executive director of the Names Project." "This is the workshop on Market Street, here in San Francisco, and it's the first stop for all of the panels." "They come here from every city and state, many different countries now, and the first thing we do is spread them out on the floor, make sure that they're the right size, and sew them into the 12-foot by 12-foot blocks" "that are the basic building unit of the Names Project quilt." "I walked in holding my little panel, and panels were just flying everywhere, and panels were just flying everywhere, just fabric going, and sequins, and everything going all directions, combined with the loud disco music..." "This is the quilt..." "it's all here." "And I realized that I couldn't just submit my panel, and walk away, and give these people more work." "I had to stay and try to help." "I think the workshop on Market Street" "I think the workshop on Market Street gave people a place to be heard, and just having a safe space where you could come in and cry if you needed to or laugh." "It really gave people meaning at a time when things seemed very, very dark." "You could just feel how desperate people were to find a way to grieve together, and to break through and warn the world of what was happening." "And Mike Smith and Cleve Jones devised this crazy idea." "Take it to Washington." "Take it to Washington." "If we could undergo this act of public grieving in sight of the Capitol building just before people decide who they're gonna vote for in the fall, that could actually have political impact." "We were laying down our dead in front of the White House." "You know, when are you gonna stop this?" "John T. Syler." "John T. Syler." "Chris Olds." "Harry." "R. Kirk Seton." "Gary Walsh." "When they came to Washington to do the first display... they decide to integrate the reading of names into the whole quilt experience." "The sound helps to define a sacred space." "David Calgaro." "David Calgaro." "And my friend, Marvin Feldman." "It really impacted on me that there's so many people dying of AIDS, and there's just so little being done." "Kim Welts..." "Mark Sombrado." "Gary Parker, Victor..." "Gary Parker, Victor..." "I'm sick of seeing my friends die." "I'm sick of it, I want them" "I want him to do something." "I want someone to do something." "And it's not on the American people 'cause the American people have done this." "Phil Osbourne." "It was never intended to be a passive memorial." "It was created to be a weapon in our war against not only a disease, but the cruelty and bigotry that the disease exposed." "But the cruelty and bigotry that the disease exposed." "Homosexuals are immoral minorities." "Homosexuality is a sin." "We want to identify every person who's a carrier." "We want to identify every possible way to stop them from spreading the disease." "If they would stop what they're doing, there would not be one additional case of AIDS in the United States of America." "The White House was doing the most unbelievable things about AIDS." "Their attitude was, "Well, who gets AIDS anyway?" "Their attitude was, "Well, who gets AIDS anyway?" ""Intravenous drug abusers, homosexual men," ""bisexual men, promiscuous heterosexuals." ""Who cares, and don't they deserve what they get anyway?"" "And that was the attitude, not of Mr. Reagan, but of his handlers." "They did not want the president mixed up with AIDS in any way." "It was a hurtful thing to feel that the president of your own country would be quite happy to watch you die." "Reagan didn't say the word AIDS publically" "Reagan didn't say the word AIDS publically until more Americans had lost their lives to this disease than had died in the entire war in Vietnam." "We had known about AIDS for 44 months." "This is 1985 I'm talking about, and the United States still has no official policy on AIDS, no presidential memorandum, nothing about AIDS that anybody could look to and say," ""This is what the United States thinks and says about AIDS."" "And the newspapers were filled with discrimination against men getting jobs, against men getting housing." "Against men getting jobs, against men getting housing." "We had hundreds, if not thousands, of charlatans having complete proof as far as they were concerned how AIDS was transmitted by casual contact." "People thought you could get it from mosquito bites." "They thought you could get it by touching a person who had HIV." "The fear among medical technicians, the disease can be spread though mouth-to-mouth resuscitation." "The 13-year-old was banned from school after it was found he was suffering from AIDS." "After it was found he was suffering from AIDS." "Mr. President, if you had younger children, would you send them to a school with a child who had AIDS?" "I'm glad I'm not faced with that problem today." "Medicine has not come forth unequivocally and said," ""This we know for a fact that it is safe."" "Until they do, I think we just have to do the best we can with this problem." "I can understand both sides of it." "I'll never stop being angry." "I'll never stop being angry." "I'm still astonished, on the one hand, by the cruelty, and bigotry, and stupidity that accompanied the disease, and, on the other hand, by the strength, and resilience, and compassion of those who responded." "This is the very first one I did." "This is the very first one I did." "Roger Lyon, the very first panel I ever made." "I took care of him for his last four months of his life." "You can see it says Cindy because Roger knew me as Cindy." "And I put my address on it 'cause I wanted mine back." "Roger opened up his life." "He had videos of bronchostomies, stuff like that, so people would know what they went through." "And at that time, you know, going on national TV and everything, that, to me, is bravery." "And everything, that, to me, is bravery." "He was very well known for this quote." ""I came here today to ask that this nation," ""with all its resources and compassion, not let my epitaph read 'He died of red tape.'"" "He died very soon after that." "This is the third one I made for Roger." "Then, I made several more for him later on." "I've made about 120 panels." "I've made about 120 panels." "I could have made many more" " I've known over 300 people that have died." "And I have one 12x12 that has all those names on it." "Lot of Names Project people and other people here." "But they're all my friends, so..." "I haven't made one for everybody, but I kind of think that when I help somebody make a panel for their son or whatever," "I've kind of made a panel for one of my friends." "I call them my boys-- The whole quilt, I call my boys, and-- 'cause I kind of feel like the mother of them, you know?" "And responsible for them, I guess." "And responsible for them, I guess." "Gary Benson." "Rodney Williams, Bobby Anderson." "Charlie Harley, George Hartel." "W.M." "This is our inaugural display, and we anticipate that the quilt will double in size today with people bringing additions." "And then in the spring, we're gonna take it out on tour and visit 36 cities, and use the quilt as a fundraising tool to raise money for those agencies as a fundraising tool to raise money for those agencies" "that are providing direct services to people with AIDS." "After the first display in 1987, we headed out on the road, and with each stop, the quilt grew." "♪" "Going on that tour from state to state." "I mean, big displays of 300 or 400 volunteers." "I mean, big displays of 300 or 400 volunteers." "These people just so hungry." ""Let us have it, let us have it!"" "I've always felt like I was on the end of it, and I was just running with it, and I was just trying, you know, to keep up with it." "And that's how I fell in love with the tour." "And nothing could hurt you or stop you." "♪ The clouds were dust raining on us ♪" "I think it was in 1992, when it came back to Washington, that I saw the first expanse." "It just went on, and on, and on." "Clifford Diller, Steven Fanuki." "Don MacClearly..." "Shane Ladner." "Elizabeth Glazier..." "Dan Bradley." "Bill Krauss." "Dr. Peter Mazoni." "Lester Eugene." "Lester Eugene." "Max Robinson." "Jack Castor." "Richard Rector." "Bruce Baher." "Roger." "We all say that Bill visited the quilt, not President Clinton." "Gore had come before, and there was all kinds of hoopla going on, you know, all kinds of CIA or whatever." "But Clinton didn't make a big deal about it." "It wasn't so that the press would see it." "It was just because he should come down." "They did find a panel that they knew of somebody there," "They did find a panel that they knew of somebody there, and I think that it really did touch him." "I know that meant a lot to Cleve." "Walking on the quilt with President and First Lady Clinton, I remember feeling that there actually was hope." "I stand here tonight as an American, a gay man, and a person living with HIV." "And I am very happy to finally have a reason." "And I am very happy to finally have a reason to say the four words that I have longed to say for so many years." "Thank you, Mr. President." "Thank you, Mr. President." "Thank you." "By and large, 30 yea later, far too many people solely associate it with homosexual men, solely associate it with homosexual men, even in the wake of 33 million folks around the world who are, by and large, heterosexual." "The early impact of this epidemic, I think, still is present." "Homophobia kills." "And it doesn't just kill gay people." "♪" "So this is a picture of my husband Lenny and I." "So this is a picture of my husband Lenny and I." "After ten years of marriage, we had three children." "Our youngest child, Tiffany, was born very sick, and no one could figure out what was wrong with her." "We went to the Mayo Clinic, we went everywhere trying to figure out what was wrong with her." "And nobody can figure it out." "By the time she was about two, my husband began to get sick." "And for a year, he was diagnosed with bleeding ulcer, allergies, all kinds of different things." "Allergies, all kinds of different things." "He had been an IV drug user when he was in the service, but had been clean for over ten years, so we never thought about it." "He died on New Year's Day 1987, and, of course, it all makes sense what was going on in our family." "So I got my children tested." "My daughter and son were fine." "And I was 29 and found out that I had AIDS, not HIV." "And I was 29 and found out that I had AIDS, not HIV." "And my daughter Tiffany died six months after my husband." "I was told I had less than two years to live." "I was 80 pounds." "I had no T-cells, and I started to prepare for death." "It was difficult to watch my two 8- and 4-year-old children running around the house playing" "My healthy children" "Because I always" "Because I always" "I had to run into a room and cry because I just pictured them as orphans." "This is a picture of Tiffany and I." "We went to the zoo." "1987... soon before she died." "This was her hospital gown." "This is one of her dresses, she wore that a lot." "That was one of her favorites." "I felt like Tiffany's spirit was here telling me that," "I felt like Tiffany's spirit was here telling me that," ""Mom, it's okay."" "♪" "Hey." "Hello." "Hey." "Hello." "Who's this?" "Curtis William Morris." "I received yesterday, just yesterday." "Wow, from Atlanta?" "From Atlanta, 36 years old." "As the disease has progressed, we began to realize we needed to bring the quilt to places that are in the most need." "This is just one of seven." "That we got in yesterday?" "That we got in yesterday." "And looking at the epidemic itself, it was emerging in the South." "Here in Atlanta, we have the CDC, we have the doctors who were at the forefront of HIV and AIDS investigation." "At the same time, this is the home of Dr. King, and public health issues are social justice issues." "So in 2002, the quilt moved to Atlanta from San Francisco." "In my community, African-American community, it is the double jeopardy of already experiencing racial stigma, and discrimination, and sexism, and ageism." "And here, you are "other" -ized by yet something else." "We are the face of the disease," "We are the face of the disease, and we have to try to come to grips with it because all of us have a stake in it." "Good afternoon, and I welcome you to this "Call My Name" panel-making workshop." "This is the launch of a ten-city tour that we're doing across the country, and we thought it appropriate to launch it right here in Atlanta, right here at Spelman College." "I think it's very therapeutic." "It took me ten years to do one for my brother," "It took me ten years to do one for my brother, but it was liberating." "It helped me a lot." "I hear him going, "Yep, you're doing it right, you're doing it right-- No, don't put that on there."" "But you can totally see his personality." "I mean, that's him." "Alvin Ailey was a wonderful dancer that created his own company in the '60s." "I always wanted to dance in the Alvin Ailey Company." "That's all I ever wanted to do." "I didn't just want to be a dancer." "I wanted to be his dancer." "He was very soft-spoken and gracious," "He was very soft-spoken and gracious, and he loved his dancers." "I'm very honored, I don't want to mess up." "I want to make it good for Alvin." "The parameters are 3x6, the size of a standard grave." "And so, in many ways, this is the largest mobile cemetery." "So whenever you are present in the presence of this quilt," "So whenever you are present in the presence of this quilt, you are standing on holy ground." "We pay tribute and call your name." "Michael Douglas Peters." "Ashay." "I found out that my uncle was HIV positive all my life, and I never knew." "My father and my grandmother passed away of AIDS when I was in kindergarten." "My family kept it away from me." "I wanted to show you this panel, this is my mother." "And this is mom and my uncle, so we even had it, like, when they were little." "So, HIV has really impacted my family, but I thought that it wasn't going to happen to me." "I was married for a long time." "And then when I divorced, I dated one guy." "Never in my wildest dreams would I even thought that I had been in a place where I could have been exposed to it." "I've been living with this disease for 23 years, and I know eventually, I'm gonna be up on the rafters." "I always disclose, I just had to put a face on it." "I know when you guys work on mine," "I'm gonna have an awesome panel." "In the beginning, they didn't think black women got HIV." "You know we were sold the bill of goods in the early days that only gay, white men got it." "Back in the days, it was the four "H" s" "Hemophiliacs, homosexuals, Haitians, and heroin users." "So back in the day, I didn't fit the mold, or I wasn't that one that was at risk." "Being in the South, the disparities here and the stigma here is still so high." "Now, who are these?" "Okay... they were identical twins?" "Oh, your babies, huh?" "Yup." "When people could see the number of panels that we have, they know it's real." "It helps dispel stigma and discrimination." "People say that it's a gay person's disease, it's God's way of punishing you, and I don't want to be near that person 'cause they have AIDS, 'cause they have AIDS, and I don't want to breathe around them," "just really hurtful and mean stuff." "So I didn't tell anybody, but I was born with it." "You want a treat?" "Yeah." "She is my little sister, she's the baby of three." "When I was eight, my mom died." "My grandmother took all three of us in." "My grandmother took all three of us in." "Here's the three of us." "Yup." "Oh, my gosh." "We were trying to dance." "In terms of my Mom, I don't think, until the day she died, she admitted to us that she was HIV positive and ultimately had full-blown AIDS." "She'd been using drugs before and up to her pregnancies with both of them, quite possibly all three of us, we don't know exactly." "The family was very cloaked about," "The family was very cloaked about, well, she died at 40-- What did she die from?" "Eventually, we found out from the medical staff that she was HIV positive." "My grandmother took me and my older sister to the doctor." "She came out negative, and I came out positive, so..." "You know, we had to make decisions, she's playing in school." "Do we need to tell the school?" "But if we tell the school, will they" "Will they do something?" "And I do remember us having, like, this family caucus around, "Okay, we can't tell anyone." "Like, this family caucus around, "Okay, we can't tell anyone." ""They're not gonna want to eat at our house because she's used the utensils."" "Like, there was just" "Like, we can't tell anybody about this." "And having to tell a nine-year-old... how does a kid understand that?" "I felt kind of..." "not normal." "I got this huge secret, and if everybody knew what I had, then everybody would abandon me." "Everybody would treat me differently." "Everybody would treat me differently." "So I just kept it to myself." "How are you?" "We're taught from an early age to silence, to walk in the closet, and walk in the dark, and lower our light, and walk in the dark, and lower our light, and just get by." "My family doctor, since I was 12, in the screening, he asked me about me about my sexuality." "He asked me if I was homosexual or normal." "Uh, what?" "Do you all think that there's still the same kind of stigma today as there was in those early years?" "Yeah." "Just having random conversations, talking about," ""Oh, he got the monster!" "Oh, he got AIDS."" "You know, something like that." "The monster?" "Yeah." "Ninja." "Those types of names that they have." "Ninja." "Those types of names that they have that just some uneducated fool that's out there who just don't have no type of common sense." "I was working in food service, and apparently, someone had heard or found out that I was positive." "And so, they tried to get me fired." "They were like, "I don't want him serving my food." ""I don't even want him to take my order, taking my money because he has AIDS," and you know." "I mean, just went off-- And I'm like, "Girl..." ""I mean, have you Googled her?" "Like, you can't get this from me taking your money."" "Like, you can't get this from me taking your money."" "Like, I mean, really?" "The ignorance is still there." "It's very prominent-- I mean..." "And how does this make you feel?" "It pisses me off because..." "Tell us how you really feel." "It pisses me off because" "What you're making me feel is that I'm not human." "You know, becoming homeless for two years, it really" "Because there was so many times I was gonna quit because there was so many times I was gonna quit because of my own mind" "My own mind just kept saying I couldn't do it," "I couldn't do it." "We all have a past." "We've all had struggles, but guess what?" "We can get past it, just like you're doing right now." "You seen my shirt, right?" ""Can."" "I can" " I can too." "I was diagnosed, and I did go to a support group that was an all-male group." "You know, I thought I was the only woman." "You know, I thought I was the only woman because I had not seen another woman." "So I just went to my doctor, and my doctor says," ""Oh, no, we have several women, but, of course, I can't share their information."" "And I said, "Could I put a flyer in your office?" "I just want to meet another woman with HIV."" "Lo and behold, women started calling, and we're talking about the same issues" "Our children, our family, our parents." "Our children, our family, our parents." "I eventually started a support group in my home and then quickly discovered, you know, you can't just do a support group and say, "Good-bye."" "So that's how we started the Women's Collective." "Welcome, everyone, to our home that we dedicate to women, girls, and families living with or at risk for HIV." "Too often, we think it's only those people that get HIV." "Yes, we have poor women with HIV, substance users with HIV." "Yes, we have poor women with HIV, substance users with HIV." "We have engineers with HIV, we have lawyers who have HIV." "Be visible and be out in the community..." "And we all have one thing in common" "The stigma associated with HIV for women." "Women are still dying disproportionately with this disease compared to men." "Most of the women we serve are single head of household, and are African American or women of African descent." "Thank you for all coming here." "Thank you for all coming here." "We have ladies who will give us their medicines to keep because they can't take them at home." "We have women who've been beaten because they showed up at a support group and they were told not to come out." "Well, you probably heard about the woman in Texas who was murdered because she disclosed her status." "And that is one story of many." "You know, stigma is sometimes worse than the disease itself, and so we don't talk about it in the way we should." "And so we don't talk about it in the way we should." "Jesus..." "Take your time, take your time." "We slept on the couch in Pat's office." "The women of the Women's Collective baby-sat, helped me get my meds... helped me to get on my feet." "If it had not been for the Women's Collective," "Pat, letting us sleep on her couch..." "Pat, letting us sleep on her couch... helping my granddaughter in elementary school" "She's now an honor roll student." "We have love, we have understanding." "It told us that we are still somebody." "Somebody." "Everything that we needed was there, even though Pat was scrapping, trying to get funding, even though Pat was scrapping, trying to get funding, trying to make people aware of what black women are going through," "to see this has been under the rug so long." "It's time now, ladies..." "it's time." "Group hug, yeah." "Okay, you're at the national headquarters of The Names Project, which houses the AIDS Quilt." "Does your school provide sex education?" "A little bit?" "Okay." "How many of you have learned how you get HIV/AIDS?" "How many of you have learned how you get HIV/AIDS?" "Well, here's an interesting thing." "We all live in the same country." "If you were in public school and lived here in Atlanta, Georgia, none of your hands would go up." "The policy and the laws in the state of Georgia, we can only teach abstinence." "How many of you think that's a realistic lesson to teenagers today?" "We know abstinence is not working 'cause we see how many teenage pregnancies as well as HIV." "They're being diagnosed from 13 on up, but we're not able to go in and teach them how to use a condom, how" "The only thing we can tell them is don't do it." "The only thing we can tell them is don't do it." "Don't have sex, don't have sex." "We need to make some changes." "Hello, everybody." "My name is Toni, and I would like to give you my feedback on the Quilt and how much it means to me." "Just getting my story out there was just a therapy," "Just getting my story out there was just a therapy, so here I am." "I start thinking to myself, "Why did this happen to me?" "Am I that bad of a person?"" "I got very depressed, to the point where I wanted to take my own life, and I have acted on that." "I just remember laying up in the hospital thinking," ""Okay, something's got to give."" "I don't think of the Quilt as just being a memorial symbol of the past." "A memorial symbol of the past." "It represents how this disease started, how far we've come with technology, and it gives us hope for the future." "Thank you." "Kevin Major." "Bill Flannigan, Jose A. Vigo." "Tom Arminio." "Bill Campbell, Rusty Hollister." "Clyde Allen." "Alvin Ailey." "Alvin Ailey." "Kevin Nikolai, Michael Seeger." "David, Najib Razul." "Today, a thousand students" "And you could have heard a pin drop." "You know, they get it." "I think it allows young people to understand it in a way that a textbook or a movie simply can't do." "And it allows them to enter at their own comfort level." "Robert Flinchester." "Robert Flinchester." "Kenton Gichy, Scott Carlson." "To walk around and to see these things, it was pretty much, like, an eye-opener on my part." "Gary Boatman." "I never even heard of the Quilt until today." "I think it's a good way to get the message across." "Yeah, 'cause you actually see real people, and, like, real lives that it affected." "It makes you open your eyes." "Robert Bobby Carl." "It's sad, like, some of them were three years old and they didn't even get to live life." "They didn't get to go to a high school." "It's just... yeah." "It's just... yeah." "Experience all the good things in life." "You get to miss out-- Like this one girl." "She was only 12, and so... that kind of stuck out to me." "♪" "We're seeing significant increases among young people." "They think that it's not a big deal if I get infected." "You know, there's medications I can take, and I'll be fine, and they don't realize the trials and they don't realize the trials that anybody living with HIV goes through even today." "The quilt is a big tool that we can use to put it back in focus that this is still happening, this is still current." "There are people on this quilt who died a year ago." "Hill Bryant Bradley, Lisa." "I hope that they'll be safer." "It's something you can't take lightly." "And there could've been kids sitting in this group right now who has it in this group right now who has it probably feeling the same way I was feeling" "Isolated, kinda lonely." "So, this is hope." "I just wish those people would have survived." "Let me see a show of hands of people who have known a person who is either living with HIV/AIDS or who has died from it." "Next time that question's asked, everybody gets to raise their hand because you've met me, and I'm a person who's living with HIV/AIDS." "Here's what I take in a week-- 24 prescriptions plus an injection, all right?" "There's only four of these pills are HIV pills." "Those cause my cholesterol." "Those cause my cholesterol." "Cholesterol's supposed to be below 200." "Mine was close to 600, driven by the medication, and it-- and it snowballs, so there's really only 4 pills in 22 that fight the disease." "The rest are counteracting what those pills do." "Since AIDS and HIV are different in every person, is each set of pills a person gets different?" "Yes, there's many different combinations of pills." "The virus can build an immunity, so it's a constantly changing thing." "Are there government programs or something." "Are there government programs or something for people who are, like" "Who are poor, or, like, homeless, or, like, in the prison systems, who don't have the possibility to get the medication?" "Okay, this is over $100,000 a year in drugs, retail." "I'm holding $2,000, if I had to go out in the streets." "So some pharmacies are helping out." "There are some charities and other" "There are some." "There's a drug assistance program called ADAP that you may have heard about in the news recently, but that's not to say that the programs tackle the problem in a way that the programs tackle the problem in a way" "that gets everyone covered and into care." "♪" "Not everyone have access to care." "In addition to that, the folks who do have access to it, sometimes, it's not realistic." "We have to put food on the table." "Do we have the money to do the co-pay for the medicine?" "Do we have the money to do the co-pay for the medicine?" "Or do we have to feed our children tonight?" "Do we fill the prescription, or do we pay the rent today?" "We had people coming to our agency who were hungry, who were homeless, and medicine is not the most important thing in their lives right now." "It's about, "I need to sleep in the alleyway." ""The shelter is full." ""I am, you know, being abused." ""I am, you know, being abused." ""I have mental health issues." ""Am I worrying about taking a pill for HIV?" "I don't think so."" "We have to take care of those things before we can get people to really focus on taking medicine and going to their doctors." "How you doing, sir?" "My name is Angela." "I work with Women's Collective." "We're out here today doing free HIV counseling/testing." "And if you could say yes to any one of these questions," "And if you could say yes to any one of these questions, then you might want to consider having your HIV test." "When was the last time you've been tested?" "About four years ago." "Okay." "How long is this going to take?" "It takes 20 minutes." "But that 20 minutes is gonna go so fast because as the test is working," "I'll be asking you some questions, okay?" "Okay, as long as there ain't no needles." "Okay, are you ready?" "Then, just relax." "All right." "♪" "♪" "Did you know their status?" "No." "Did they have a test or not?" "I didn't even ask them." "Specific to us older women, what a lot of people do is imagine exclusion from the disease." ""I go to church regularly, God wouldn't do that to me."" "This here will tell you some of the ways that you can get infected." "Some of the ways that you can get infected." "And this is a disease that people understand is sexually transmitted." "So, ageism says," ""You mean you're still getting busy, and you're older?"" "So, often times, older women are not getting tested." "Something like the women's collective makes it easier to say your own name out loud." "What you're here as a part of is the "Call My Name" panel-making workshop for the AIDS Memorial Quilt." "We are trying to finish 100 individual panels." "We are trying to finish 100 individual panels by the time we get to the Smithsonian Folk Life Festival." "I'm so happy to be here at the Women's Collective because we're probably going to make more panels for women today than we've ever done in a workshop." "It is absolutely groundbreaking for us." "I should have had a camera and put it on YouTube." "I thought if I kissed a boy, I would get pregnant." "I thought if I kissed a boy, I would get pregnant." "I love it." "♪ The more we get together, the stronger we'll be ♪" "All right." "We need to get us a record contract around here." "Situation we in now about the AIDS is because of lack of education." "Break the vicious cycle of this ignorance, and that's what we're doing through our quilting." "We letting it all-- We're gonna let it all hang out at the Mall." "All hang out at the Mall." "This is me, this is my life." "This is how I live." "Here at the Women's Collective, the women can come in and get the things that I wasn't able to get when I was diagnosed, so I am really thrilled and honored and-- about that." "But I would love to have my husband and child back, so, you know, it's always that bittersweet place." "I see for myself as being a veterinary assistant." "Right now, I'm a building service worker over at Stone High School." "My grandmother passed away four years ago." "I came a long way, and I just hope she's proud of me... her and my mom." "The fastest-growing group right now that we're seeing is young, gay men." "You know, so why is that?" "Is it because this is a disease that happened generations ago, and they're not seeing it as current?" "And so they're out there putting themselves at risk again?" "You know, I'm not really sure." "I'm not really sure." "When I found out, I cried in my room for three days straight, and all I thought about when I found out is, like, "I can't have children."" "Children was something that I've always wanted." "I can still have children, but-- no, but" "That was just something that was, like, whoa." "What, is this really-- Is this real?" "Is this happening today?" "Being from Gainesville, Florida and all, we don't" "We didn't talk about HIV unless it was shunning someone." "And, you know, if you heard," ""Oh, well so-and-so has it, oh, stay away from them,."" ""Oh, well so-and-so has it, oh, stay away from them,"" "you know, it was very much, like, a negative." "I didn't really have that thirst to figure out what exactly HIV was because, honestly, I just didn't feel like it was relevant to me at the time." "A lot of the young people these days now, from what I'm observing, is," ""Oh, I ain't gonna catch it." ""No, three years and counting-- Oh, I trust him." "I'm in love, you know?"" "It's still that type of thing that's going on with the young people now." "They don't think, they don't have the knowledge or anything." "You know, even though it's out there for them, they don't care." "You know, even though it's out there for them, they don't care." "And we don't care-- you won't care until it hits you." "It's so unfortunate that we are still on this." "It's not just one group that's affected by this." "Like, we're all affected by this." "I host regular potlucks for young guys" "I host regular potlucks for young guys in my neighborhood who are HIV-positive." "Most of them are African-American or Latino... and it's just heartbreaking." "We learn so many important lessons, and people just seem so intent upon forgetting those lessons." "♪" "It was really hard to leave San Francisco." "I really miss it, but I love the quilt so much," "I really miss it, but I love the quilt so much, and a lot of it is because it's still healing me." "Or maybe not healing me, but it still helps me." "I feel a responsibility to it beyond belief." "Um, I-- you know, they're my boys, and it's like Scarlett O'Hara with the-- when he goes," ""You get the strength out of the ground," you know?" "And that's my strength." "I-- it-- it feeds me, you know?" "♪" "♪" "As we start to look at the Folk Life Festival and how much quilt needs to be folded, packed, repaired, they have their work cut out for them." "We have a group coming in." "They're gonna start pulling and tagging blocks, and probably even packing some." "♪" "♪" "They're all numbered, shelved." "Fun." "♪" "4-1-8-6." "That's one." "4-9-4-2." "4-4-5-4." "Two of them." "♪ Well, the Devil got my number ♪" "♪ Well, the Devil got my number ♪" "♪ And the Devil got my size ♪" "♪ And the Devil got my head ♪" "♪ And the Devil got my eyes ♪" "♪ I'ma tryin' hard to get up ♪" "♪ Lest he make it to my heart ♪" "♪ 'Cause I wanna make it back ♪" "♪ From the dark, dark, dark ♪" "♪ A-ha, yeah, yeah, a-ha, ha, yeah ♪" "♪ Well, a-ha-ha, yeah, and a-ha-ha-- ♪" "Welcome to the 46th Annual Smithsonian Folk Life Festival." "This year, we celebrate with the historic AIDS Memorial Quilt." "It's been 16 years since we last brought the Quilt in a large display to Washington, D.C." "We've been working on a very grassroots level, and it may have seemed to be invisible because we've been doing a thousand displays a year, but we've been doing them in middle schools, and high schools, and shopping malls." "So to be here in the Smithsonian Folk Life Festival is actually huge." "Is actually huge." "We have to make sure that these stories are told from generation to generation because we cannot let this happen again." "♪" "There are HIV infection rates here in Washington, D.C." "that rival certain parts of sub-Saharan Africa." "Had we cared more 30 years ago when gay people suffered and died under stigma, shame, and silence, under stigma, shame, and silence, we would not be where we are right now." "If somebody told me that we'd still be doing this at this time-- 'cause to me, it's kind of a failure." "You know, how could people not understand?" "Once we put it out, how could they not understand, and how could they not stop it?" "The one nation on Earth that had the advance warning, the resources, the knowledge, the institutions in place the resources, the knowledge, the institutions in place to stop this in its tracks, failed, failed completely and absolutely," "and failed really for one reason and one reason only, and that is that it was perceived as a gay disease." "And that stupid, unscientific, bigoted, hateful response... continues to this day to hamper our ability to respond to what has become the worst pandemic in the history of humanity." "The worst pandemic in the history of humanity." "This is a panel for Steven Kaufman." "He's our son." "Everybody got a 12 " x 12" square to do whatever they chose." "And they could do whatever they wanted." "Mine took his name and grew each into flowers because he was a horticulture major." "It was done by ten people," "It was done by ten people, which was hard to narrow down to 'cause Steven had so many people who loved him." "This is mine." "This is his dog, Sabi." "We knew he would love it, that, um..." "I kept it in my car for about six months before I shipped it away to San Francisco." "It was hard to part with it." "Interestingly enough, two of the people on here are no longer with us." "And one of AIDS." "One of AIDS." "To come here and see this, and-- you gotta shake your head and say, "It's such a waste."" "♪" "Franklin Sills." "Franklin Sills." "The First Baptist Church of Deanwood." "Barbara Wales." "Tiffany and Lenny Nalls." "It was hard. but it's a part of that quilt." "My family will now be a part of that big picture, and I can say, you know, they were here." "And I can say, you know, they were here." "They were really here." "They're out, and they're open, and they're free." "Glen Burke." "Paul R. Duscent." "Michael Cortman." "Taulu Lester." "In 1987, when they first unveiled the quilt, there were 2,000 panels." "Yet here today, it'll be 48,000 panels." "Yet here today, it'll be 48,000 panels." "We have done a lot, but not enough." "John S." "Mario M." "Mark M." "You were there in service to the quilt, but the quilt was the focal point." "Just the fact that the quilt is part of the Smithsonian Folk Life Festival means to me that we've made great, great strides." "And the quilt is bigger than all of us." "This is tangible proof that over the last 25 years... our culture has come an awful long way." "Rick H..." "Robby." "We must be willing to not leave anyone behind." "Think of the one person that still needs a cure." "Think of the one discovery that will get us to an AIDS-free generation." "Samara Jones." "In 1988, a single panel was delivered to the Names Project." "In 1988, a single panel was delivered to the Names Project." "It was unlike any other panel submitted before or since." "It arrived with a handwritten note." ""I hope this quilt will find a permanent place and help mark the end of this devastating disease."" "Those who received it knew just what to do" "Hold onto it and the hope that it conveyed, for the panel itself said it all." "There's a wonderful panel that says "The Last One,"" "and we are waiting until we're sure that it is, and it gets sewn in last." "The last one begins with the last new infection, the last AIDS case, and the last AIDS death, the last child orphaned." "The last one begins when hearts and minds are open, where stigma ends and compassion begins." "Where stigma ends and compassion begins." "Bobby Becca." "Bruce Anandas." "Chad Lewis." "Luis." "Michael Egan." "Michael Sargeant." "Maggie." "Robert Rose." "Forest Bowers." "Stephen Lawrence." "Marcos." "Armando A. Amaro." "Tom Myles." "Marion." "Bob Burke." "Arthur J. Orga." "Gayle Treadway." "Carlos Elias." "Jean Williams." "George Lewis." "Darryl Walter." "Skip." "Ken, Jack." "Skip." "Ken, Jack." "♪" "♪ I want to leave my footprints ♪" "♪ On the sands of time ♪" "♪ Know there was something ♪" "♪ That I left behind ♪" "♪ When I leave this world ♪" "♪ When I leave this world ♪" "♪ I'll leave no regrets ♪" "♪ Leave something to remember ♪" "♪ So they won't forget ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ I lived, I loved ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ I did, I've done everything that I wanted ♪" "♪ And it was more than I thought it would be ♪" "♪ And it was more than I thought it would be ♪" "♪ I will leave my mark ♪" "♪ So everyone will know ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ I want to say I lived each day ♪" "♪ Until I die ♪" "♪ I know that I meant something ♪" "♪ In somebody's life ♪" "♪ The hearts I have touched ♪" "♪ Will be the proof that I leave ♪" "♪ Will be the proof that I leave ♪" "♪ That I made a difference ♪" "♪ And this world will see ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ I lived, I loved ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ I did, I've done ♪" "♪ Everything that I wanted ♪" "♪ And it was more than I thought it would be ♪" "♪ And it was more than I thought it would be ♪" "♪ I will leave my mark ♪" "♪ So everyone will know ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ Here ♪" "♪ I lived, I loved ♪" "♪ Here ♪" "♪ I did, I've done ♪" "♪ Everything that I wanted ♪" "♪ More than I thought it would be ♪" "♪ More than I thought it would be ♪" "♪ Ooh ♪" "♪ I was here ♪" "♪ I lived, I loved ♪" "♪ Here ♪" "♪ I lived ♪"