"Excuse me, ma'am." "Excuse me." "(SCREECHING IN HEADPHONES)" "You got a problem, pretty boy?" "Well, sorry." "I don't mean to interrupt, but Jodi at the store said you were up here, and, uh, probably weren't wearing a wrist-seismo." "SOP for Graboid country, isn't it?" "Bought mine online." "Got my own redundancy system, as well." "Dr. Donna Debevic, San Diego Animal Science Labs." "And I'm no virgin to risk." "(WRIST-SEISMO BUZZING)" "(BEEPS)" "(WHISPERING) Graboid." "Don't move." "I know." "I'm sending out an ultrasonic signal to attract him." "You're doing what?" "I'm here to record the sounds of your Graboid." "Great." "Now, turn the signal off." "Which one of those is it?" "Too late for that." "(RUMBLING)" "How you plan on getting rid of him?" "Decoy the brute." "(RUMBLING CONTINUES)" "What the hell?" "Did you decoy him?" "No." "He doesn't give up that quickly." "You must have done something." "Negative." "Simply recording the sightless beast." "(BEEPS) Looks like your beast... (SCREECHING IN HEADPHONES)" "(EXCLAIMS) Damn, that one is loud!" "(BEEPS)" "TYLER:" "What the hell is that?" "There's another Graboid in the valley." "So?" "You got your monitoring system." "We're safe, aren't we?" "(BEEPS)" "(STATIC)" "What..." "DEBEVIC:" "I was so absorbed in my work," "I didn't notice my tire was flat." "What was it you heard that made your ears hurt?" "Graboid that chased the first one away." "(SCREECHING ON TAPE)" "Graboids don't sound like that." "I see." "And you know this because you've professionally recorded them on your state of the art equipment subterraneanly?" "Probably know it because I live with one." "Every individual in the species has its own voice." "Not exactly what I want to hear." "Where you staying?" "I'm bunking at the lab while Dr. Matthews is away." "I'm finishing up my book on animal communications while adding to my collection of animal distress signals and wildlife mating calls." "Mating calls?" "(SCOFFS) I've been there." "Heard the jokes." "Guess so." "You scientists sure don't know how to leave us alone out here, do you?" "You're the one who chose to live in North America's most scientifically interesting stretch of acreage." "You want a quiet life, live in LA." "So, what do you think?" "Sorry, Jodi." "Yeah, it's like the mummy's hand suddenly creeping out of nowhere, huh?" "Larry, what are you doing here?" "Well, I would have e-mailed you but they canceled my account." "I hope you don't mind but I did a little rearranging of the shelves." "I was at Nancy's for 20 minutes and you take over my store?" "Yeah." "See, it's all about how you display the stuff." "I mean, there's dust on half these items." "You're not moving the merchandise." "That's because they're paving the road, Larry." "You didn't notice?" "I get like maybe five or six customers a day if I'm lucky." "What is this?" "(EXCLAIMS) It's a gift!" "Fly strips." "Yeah, see, my mom, she uses them back in Kenosha, and there's no flies on her pimento loaf." "Ever!" "Larry, right here." "Focus!" "What are you doing back in Perfection?" "You guys were so great to me when I visited last time and I went back to Wisconsin, and I like, looked at my life, and I thought things through..." "Whoa!" "Wait!" "You're not visiting?" "You moved here?" "Larry, you've got to understand," "I mean, we all live here because either we really enjoy solitude..." "Tell me about it." "...or we hate the big city corporate life!" "Tell me about it." "But we can barely make a living." "Tell me about it." "Larry, listen, if you think you can live here, please do not try to run my store." "Okay, yeah, yeah, it's your store." "You're in charge." "I'm just your assistant." "Hey, Tyler, it's me." "I'm afraid so." "He's visiting again?" "You're not serious." "You know, if I move here, the population of your town increases 14% ." "Yeah, well, it's gonna decrease fast because we might have a second Graboid out there." "Oh!" "What?" "No kidding!" "How did that happen?" "I mean, where did he come from?" "Don't know." "Just saw something on my seismo-screen before the whole system went down." "Communications snafu." "Been through it before." "Although I was not concerned, the fact is our wrist-seismos failed to perform adequately." "The two us easily could have been caught with our shorts down." "You know, figuratively speaking." "This is Dr..." "Donna Debevic, animal communications, here to study Graboid-speak." "They speak?" "Ultrasonically." "Day of the Dolphin, George C. Scott, 1973." "(IMITATING DOLPHIN SQUEALING)" ""Alpha love Beta." "Beta love Fa."" "You ever see that film?" "(WRIST-SEISMOS BUZZING) Good movie." "Hmm?" "Seismos seem to be working now." "Shouldn't things start shaking by now?" "What, what, what?" "What?" "What?" "(BEEPING)" "There's no Graboids for miles." "(BEEPING)" "TYLER:" "It's nowhere near us." "(STATIC NOISE)" "What the hell?" "This doesn't happen." "It did." "Either a faulty power source or some kind of interference with the signal." "No, power's fine." "We check the geophones around the valley once a week." "Could be your signal's jammed." "First thing an alien invasion force would do is jam all..." "Larry, if you don't shut up..." "Someone might jam your communications." "JODI:" "What the heck is this?" "LARRY:" "It's a second Graboid." "This is so cool!" "No, this is not so cool." "Logic suggests it's why our seismos aren't working." "Because of a second worm?" "That doesn't make any sense." "I'm gonna go check the geophones." "Okay, bro." "Let's round up Burt." "Get to work!" "Burt's not here." "And neither are you!" "I'll be back." "Oh, hold on, cowboy, if there is another Graboid out there," "I want to be there to hear him talk again." "Forget it!" "DEBEVIC:" "Look, you know, you need..." "Where's Burt?" "Idaho." "On assignment." "No way, Doc." "We're flying blind here and I already saved you from one horrible death." "DEBEVIC:" "How?" "By giving me a ride?" "For which I'll mention you in the paper I'm writing." "But I have signed a release form and you do have possession of my equipment." "Yes, I do." "You son of a..." "I thought I recognized your car." "Hey, Nancy, I'm here." "Yes, you are." "What for?" "He's my driver." "Your friend's not leaving without me." "Great!" "He needs backup, anyway." "See you later." "MAN:" "Come on, nice and easy." "How you doing?" "JODI ON RADIO:" "We're having trouble with the seismo-monitors." "Tyler's checking on it right now but you should be careful." "ROSALITA:" "I will." "I'm just trying to figure out what happened to the fence posts." "Fence posts?" "Yeah, the ones Harlow put in yesterday." "And now somebody stole them." "But how do you do that without taking the wire?" "ROSALITA ON RADIO:" "It's like the wood just vanished." "Listen, you should head for cover until we get the monitoring system working okay again." "Jodi out." "(SIGHS)" "MAN:" "Hey, slow down!" "Sorry, Tyler." "Had no choice." "She's a very forceful woman." "She's got a Xena thing going on." "TYLER:" "Yeah, she kinda reminds me of Burt." "The way Burt put these things together, there's no way they could misread a signal." "Hey, what's he doing in Idaho, anyway?" "I won't tell a soul." "Really?" "(WHISPERS) Really." "It's a downed spacecraft." "They think it may be Venutians." "They needed Burt's expertise in tracking the escaped aliens." "Just kidding." "Don't do that to me!" "(BOTH LAUGH)" "Sorry, he's just picking up an old periscope from some scrap dealer." "(SCREECHING IN HEADPHONES)" "(EXCLAIMS)" "That same sound again?" "Maybe it's the other Graboid." "DEBEVIC:" "Negative." "After hearing it a second time, in no way does it resemble a Graboid." "(SCREECHING ON TAPE)" "That's in the ground?" "How nice." "Because the one thing we don't have enough of around here is stuff we can't explain." "(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)" "(INSECTS CHIRPING)" "(CHIRPING GETS LOUDER)" "(GASPS)" "This is..." "This... (GROANS IN DISGUST)" "(SCREAMING)" "(GASPS)" "(LOUD CHIRPING)" "Tell you what I'm planning since I am the authority figure around here, okay." "First of all, I'm gonna put a siren on that frigging Graboid, so I can tell where the hell he is, okay?" "Second, I think I'm gonna rename this place like Wacky Valley or Pain-in-My-Ass Land!" "How does that sound?" "Doing fine, Twitchell." "How you doing?" "I'm suicidal, thank you." "The only reason I'm not pulling the trigger is my insurance isn't paid up, and Gummer's not around to spew his anti-government invective." "How about that?" "I was right." "I can pick one a mile away." "Government bureaucrat." "Bull's eye, lady!" "Who would you be?" "You want a name or a Social Security number?" "Well, whatever it takes to get into your tax returns." "This is Dr. Debevic." "You gave her clearance to do some... (CHUCKLES) Oh!" "Right!" "Right, right, right!" "You're the lady who wrote the book on whales singing." "My wife loved it." "Made me drive all the way to SeaWorld." "Thanks a bunch." "Oh!" "Wait till she reads my book about Graboids." "(PANTING) We got five somethings on the monitor." "Could it be a Graboid?" "Or could it be something worse?" "Drop your socks and grab our boxes, gentlemen." "We got work to do." "Friend of Gummer's?" "Your attention, gentlemen, that blip is your Graboid." "Those others are what we'll call our UUOs." "(BEEPING)" "UUOs?" "Unidentified underground objects." "Bear with me here." "Now, under careful scrutiny, you can see the Graboid blip is solid, while the UUOs show evidence of fragmentation." "Wait a second, wait a second." "I was told there's another Graboid out here, bigger than the Loch Ness Monster, rampaging around eating hundreds of fence posts and stuff." "Who told you that?" "Obi-Wan Ke-Dork over here." "Well, I just thought that, well, you know..." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "So what the hell are they if not El Blanco and his friends?" "I don't know." "But I do know Graboids do not eat wood." "Wait a minute." "They don't eat wood?" "Really?" "They eat cows." "They eat people." "They eat burros." "And you said they ate your car." "But somehow, they draw the line at wood." "You know, every time I come out here you guys are throwing curveballs at my head." "I can't keep it straight!" "Are you through?" "Yeah." "Good." "Coupled with the sound I heard," "I think we're talking about a horde of insects." "Insects." "So cool!" "The Swarm?" "Michael Caine?" "You ever see it?" "All these killer bees attack an Air Force base, they don't know what to do." "So, the Air Force..." "Larry, there's a time for that." "Childhood!" "So you're telling me this whole thing is about bugs." "(SCREAMING)" "(LOUD CHIRPING)" "(CAR ENGINE STARTS)" "(ROSALITA SCREAMS)" "(CHUCKLES)" "Now, why the hell am I out here?" "Your job, apparently." "What about all the noise they make?" "I graphed their sound wave pattern." "It's pretty standard in the animal kingdom, although unusually high in pitch and volume." "Here, you see both a shift in frequency and in wavelength." "Now, if I put these patterns up against patterns of known insects," "I get some very interesting correlations." "Bugs!" "Jodi, Jodi." "Um, you have your Graboid stuff mixed in with your Shrieker stuff, mixed in with, like, your Ass-Blaster stuff." "Yes." "Well, for collectors, it's no good." "I mean, we're very compartmentalized." "When we go to Sci-Fi-Con, how are we ever gonna find, let's say, a Wallace Wood's Skymaster of Sky Force if it's displayed with back issues of Fangoria magazine?" "(LAUGHS) I mean, come on." "It's just not gonna happen." "Larry, do you see that broom over there?" "Yeah." "Nancy really, really wanted to borrow it." "Okay, Jodester." "Let me just take care of this Graboid stuff." "(JODI SIGHS)" "Pay for the Popsicle first." "You see the similarities in these two?" "If I had to guess, I'd go with cicada exuviae, specifically Diceroprocta apache, because we're in a hot climate." "Trust me, when it comes to noise, these guys can pin the meter." "Cicadae?" "You mean those bugs that come out of the ground every 20 years or so?" "Their maturation cycles vary from 13 to 17 years, at which point they surface to lay their eggs." "And they make a sound like you heard underground?" "I've never known them to make any sound underground." "But then, I've never known them to match the decibel levels of a jet take-off or a .50 caliber anti-aircraft gun, either." "So maybe we got cicadae amped out the wazoo, causing the geophones to misread." "Astute observation." "Let's discuss the oscillatory circuitry." "Let's not, okay?" "Fine." "(KNOCKING AT DOOR)" "Come in." "Hey, Nancy." "Brought your broom." "My broom?" "Oh, thanks." "So, Larry, what is all this nonsense about another Graboid?" "(CHUCKLES) Graboid." "Nonsense." "Yeah, who'd believe that?" "It's bugs." "What?" "It's a good thing I showed up." "I think Tyler and I are gonna be able to handle it." "Hey, you ever see that Charlton Heston movie where..." "The Naked Jungle, 1954." "Yes, I did." "So what are we supposed to do?" "Well, Twitchell's here and that Dr. Debevic thinks that it's cicadae." "Uh-huh." "Larry, what's the real reason you came back to Perfection?" "Well, you know, to see El Blanco." "I never actually laid eyes on him last time I was here." "Wow!" "I thought only my mother could stare at me that way." "To be honest, I decided to move out of my parents' basement." "They wanted to remodel." "Are they converting it to a playroom or something?" "Handball court." "Oh!" "Which is surprising 'cause I never knew they actually played the sport." "What about your job at Walmart?" "Weren't you training to be an assistant manager?" "Yeah, yeah." "And it was going really well, and then one day, I just had to stop myself, right in the middle of aisle four, audio appliances, and I thought to myself, "Lawrence..."" "(MUMBLES)" ""Do you really see yourself as part of the Walmart family?"" "And?" "And I noticed something." "That the people that I work with at Walmart, when they're at Walmart, they're at Walmart." "But I'm always someplace else, you know?" "Out in the wilds, having adventures," "Skull Island or Middle Earth." "Here." "So I thought to myself, why not just move to where I am?" "All I need is a change of clothes and my DVDs..." "A couch to crash on... (CLEARS THROAT)" "Any old couch." "Yes, my guess is the decibel levels overloaded your whole system." "What about El Blanco's system?" "That's gotta be why he moved all the way up against the mountains, to get as far away as he can from that noise." "(YELLING) Something ate my shed with me in it!" "I'm guessing bugs." "What?" "My ears are ringing!" "(YELLING) Did you see it?" "Can you describe it?" "Yeah, it's like the stuff stuck on my windshield!" "(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)" "Imagine that running across your bathroom floor in the middle of the night." "TYLER:" "How come the uglier something looks, the more of them they are." "Mother Nature's funny like that." "You got a plastic bag?" "Hmm." "Be right back." "Want to get this to the lab, see what we're dealing with." "But first, let's stop by your place." "(YELLS) What did you say?" "They warned you about this place, right?" "Oh, yeah." "I mean, that's why the county's paying us double time." "Well, that's fair." "But, you know, since those wrist-seismos aren't working so well, you guys should really head back home until we got this whole bug thing under control." "(CHUCKLES) Take a look at this." "Oh, you gotta check this out." "I was in here the other day." "They didn't have any." "Hey, you must have just got more of these in, huh?" "Hey." "Oh, and a few of these Graboid things right there." "Guess you found everything okay." "(CHUCKLES) Yeah, pretty much." "Think I cleaned you out of all your Graboid stuff." "Stuff sells pretty well, huh?" "Actually, you're..." "You're right, can't keep it in stock." "Hey, where'd everybody go?" "Up to Rosalita's." "Okay, that's $35.63 for you." "Here you go." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Okay, and for you..." "Find it all okay?" "Yeah, no problem." "Thanks." "Everything where you thought it was gonna be?" "It was." "Thanks." "Pretty much." "$22.95." "Okay, there you go." "Thank you." "Keep the change." "Thanks." "Hey, guys, you be careful out there, okay?" "Next week's our two-for-one special." "Two for one?" "Yeah." "Well, the good news is if they're eating wood, they're not eating..." "Don't say it, don't say it." "Well, whatever did this feeds on dry wood, like termites." "From what you said, I'm assuming they only make that ear-splitting sound when they've spotted food." "So it's cicada, and now maybe termites?" "I got that old bad feeling we're talking about..." "I said don't say it." "Mixmaster!" "Mixmaster?" "A compound that unfortunately leaked into the valley." "Allows DNA of various non-human species to combine to form new life forms." "That's all I can say." "Well, where the hell did that come from?" "It's classified." "Oh!" "Government's involved." "Sweep those costly screw-ups under the rug, huh?" "Where are you coming from anyway, huh?" "From a career that has been nothing but impeded by intrusive federal bureaucracy." "Yeah, I don't want to discourage political debate here but maybe we can just work together." "Okay?" "I'm going to go isolate some spoor from our mysterious life form." "Check its DNA." "You do that." "ROSALITA:" "What am I gonna do?" "My house is made out of wood, you know." "Well, the whole town's made out of wood." "Not your place." "You live in a tin can." "Hey, you mind if I bunk with you for a few days?" "What are neighbors for?" "Thank you." "So friendly around here." "Hey, Tyler, those guys working on the road, you tell 'em to clear out, okay?" "Couldn't do that, Twitch, considering you're the authority figure around here." "Fine." "I gotta do everything myself, anyway." "Hey, hey, Tyler, listen, if I take the main road, is it..." "Okay, here goes, 15 cc's." "Okay, Casey." "What next?" "(COUGHS)" "Into the spectrometer?" "Huh?" "Spectrometer." "Oh!" "The old microwave there." "Doesn't know what a spectrometer is." "Okay, so far, we have isolated the cicadae and the termite DNA." "So now we're looking to see if there's a third species lurking in there somewhere, right?" "Off the table!" "Break something and I've got the authorities making me file damage reports, asking for info they do not have the constitutional right to request." "You know, if you'd maybe stick around till Burt gets back, you just might hit it off." "Yeah, I caught his 60 Minutes interview." "What a stiff!" "I prefer a man with a sense of joie de vivre or a man worth shaving my legs for." "So what if there's maggot DNA in these bugs?" "What's that?" "Baby flies or something?" "Rosalita, they eat meat." "They eat flesh." "Once they get their fill of wood, they'll start on warm-blooded animals." "(FAINT CHIRPING)" "Twitch, Tyler here." "Do you copy?" "(ON RADIO) Twitch, Tyler here." "You copy?" "(CHIRPING GETS LOUDER)" "Twitch, Tyler here." "Come in." "(GROANS)" "(LOUD CHIRPING CONTINUES)" "(GROANS)" "(INSECTS PATTERING)" "(VEHICLE APPROACHING)" "Twitch, I knew I'd find you on the way to the road crew." "Come on." "Let's go, Twitch." "(GRUNTS) Come on." "TYLER:" "Come on." "(DISTANT CHIRPING)" "(MAN GROANING)" "(MAN SCREAMING)" "(LOUD CHIRPING)" "(GROANS)" "(GROANING)" "(LOUD CHIRPING CONTINUES)" "That woman, Dr. Debevic, gave me these." "Plays a signal that counteracts the sound of the bugs." "What?" "TYLER:" "Trucks are still here." "Hey, guys!" "This guy's dead, too." "You found him." "JODI:" "Where's your car?" "TWITCHELL:" "What?" "He almost got swarmed by those things." "DEBEVIC:" "Thank goodness, the Fed's okay." "I got there just before the bugs got him." "We also found those two road crew guys." "They're dead." "I think it's time we pack our bags and get our tails out of here." "Leave our homes and come back to what?" "Just for a while, Nancy." "Well, you saw them where?" "Between here and Rosalita's." "That's like three miles." "The road crew guys were closer." "Okay, so let's move up to the north end of the valley for a while, stay out of their way and wait 'em out." "The point is there's a bunch of the swarms out there, and we've got no idea where they are." "They roam around hungry just looking for targets of opportunity." "What are they exactly?" "What you get when you mix termite and cicada DNA." "Throw in a few maggot genes for fun." "Termites, cicadae..." "Tercadae!" "My guess is they're about to lay eggs." "Lots of eggs." "(DISTANT CHIRPING)" "Do you hear that?" "Listen." "Listen." "It's them." "Where's he going?" "(CHIRPING CONTINUES)" "(BEEPING)" "It's time to get the frick out of here." "Get yourself out." "I'm not ready to leave." "Not yet." "What is it with you people?" "You never leave!" "There's millions of 'em!" "We might be able to off road around 'em if we hurry." "How are we gonna get around them with all the noise?" "I'd rather fight them here than be sitting ducks out there." "Fight them with what?" "Okay, Doctor, how do you think they target on something?" "Sight?" "Sense of smell?" "Look at their DNA, they're using everything." "Wait." "They've got like super smelling, right?" "Well, can't we decoy them, get them to follow some other smell?" "Better than this?" "We're the highest concentration of dry wood and fresh meat around." "We shouldn't be the food." "We're smarter." "Who freaking cares?" "Smart and eaten by bugs is not good!" "Okay, let's think about this." "If we are the food, what's more tempting than food?" "What's the one thing that every living creature can't possibly resist?" "Doctor, you mentioned your recordings, your collection of mating calls, right?" "I see where you're going." "Is there one in there that might attract those insects?" "I've got 'em all but we left 'em in the truck." "But how do you know it's their mating season?" "That's moot." "Moot?" "The mating season for arthropods is when they hear their mating call." "But how are we gonna get to the tapes?" "Isn't it too late?" "It's never too late." "I'll get you there." "Come on." "Tyler, I'm here for you, man." "Forget it, man." "One guy stupid enough to try this, that's me." "Down!" "Come on!" "You're not the only one stupid enough!" "Why do you think I moved to this town?" "Let's do it!" "I know." "I know I didn't listen to you, but you're just gonna have to get used to it." "Been used to it from the moment I met you." "Got it!" "I got it!" "I got it." "Here it is." "Arthropoda Insecta Isoptera." "It's horny termites." "We need a speaker." "Yeah." "How about your boom box, I can hot-wire that." "We don't need a boom box." "(CHUCKLES) I laugh at boom boxes." "(LOUD MUSIC PLAYING ON CAR STEREO)" "Wicked, huh?" "Yeah, five-channel amp with built-in crossover and bass boost for plenty of low-end grunt." "(MUSIC STOPS)" "Can you wire it?" "No problem." "Yeah, I bought it to impress girls, but all I got was hearing loss." "(LOUD CHIRPING)" "I called for a helicopter in case Tyler's bright idea craps out on us!" "The little buggy bastards!" "I don't think yelling at them is gonna help!" "They just covered the road!" "It was good of you to stay here, Twitch!" "It's easier than going home to the wife!" "Just kidding!" "Hey, this is my valley, too!" "Besides, I was ashamed to steal one of your cars." "That should do it." "(INSECTS CHIRPING ON CAR STEREO)" "Okay, that sounds good." "Let's go." "(CHIRPING CONTINUES)" "Well?" "Let's do it!" "Can I drive?" "In the back." "(ENGINE STARTS)" "(INSECTS CHIRPING)" "They're everywhere!" "TWITCHELL:" "I can't take it anymore!" "JODI:" "Come on, to the freezer!" "Quick, let's get inside!" "(FAINT CHIRPING)" "(INSECTS CHIRPING ON CAR STEREO)" "Come and get it." "(CHIRPING FADES)" "(SNEEZES)" "(SNIFFS)" "This has gotta be like the slowest speed chase ever!" "Doctor, where exactly are we going?" "I never thought it through that far." "We could go to Lake Mead." "I'm serious!" "Just like Beginning of the End, 1957, Peter Graves." "They drive these grasshoppers into the lake." "It's awesome!" "We're gonna drive all the way to Lake Mead with these guys?" "What are we gonna do, drive down the interstate?" "What about that road down there?" "Larry and I commandeer a couple of vehicles." "You lead them down the road, we drive over them." "Road?" "Yeah." "But we don't have to crush 'em." "The word flambé comes to mind." "Just keep heading for the road." "(CHIRPING ON CAR STEREO CONTINUES)" "(CAR ENGINE SPUTTERING)" "Come on!" "Please!" "Please!" "Come on!" "No, no, no!" "Just a little more." "Little more." "(CAR ENGINE STOPS)" "No!" "No!" "(INSECTS CHIRPING)" "Good thinking." "(GRUNTS)" "What the hell is he doing?" "(GRUNTING)" "(INSECTS CHIRPING)" "TYLER:" "This ought to barbecue those suckers real good." "What were you thinking?" "I don't get the mileage I used to." "(GRUNTS)" "That all of 'em?" "How many do you want?" "Gentlemen, light your bugs." "You got a lighter?" "Lighter?" "No." "No." "TYLER:" "Hey, the Ass-Blaster lighter." "It's either amazingly good news or unbelievably bad." "Thanks, Larry, for the idea." "Beginning of the End?" "No, fly paper." "Listen, Doc, I'll get out there tomorrow and put some new tires on your truck." "Awful gentlemanly of you to offer her a ride back to the lab, Twitch." "Yeah, it's not a problem." "She seems okay with it." "If not, I'll find out about it when I run her TRW, check her credit card purchases and get that list of websites she logs onto." "Hey, you're a riot." "I may very well be recording this whole conversation and you would never know it, so be careful." "You just try it there, Doctor Dolittle." "Don't tempt me, you mid-level functionary." "(MOANING)" "(COUGHING)" "Hey, sick person." "(GROANS)" "Here's some tea, and I have one question for you." "What night is tonight?" "I don't know." "Vincent Price night!" "All right, I'll let you pick." "We've got Theater of Blood, House on Haunted Hill," "Tales of Terror." "And The Fly, which is a great DVD." "(MOANS) This is gonna be great." "Hey, Nancy, later, when you go to bed and stuff, and you're not using the couch, uh..." "I mean, I'm perfectly happy sleeping in my car and everything..." "In the cold." "Larry, you may have the guest room." "Really?" "Really." "(CHUCKLES) Oh, my own room." "For one week." "Seven nights." "(SNEEZES)" "I understand." "I'm sure you have lots of uses..." "I mean, you've got people and guests coming and going." "I'm sure you got lots of plans for that big, empty room just sitting there." "Yes, I do, Larry." "Handball." "(SNEEZES)" "(MOANS)"