"BASSEM:" "Please use caution when trying any techniques used in this movie." "Speaking out against oppressive regimes may cause side effects such as headaches, mood swings, sweating, indigestion, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, loss of home, loss of friends, loss of constitutionally guaranteed rights," "death, and vaginal dryness." "This movie may not be appropriate for all audiences." "If you're a dictator, please leave the room now." "(TRAFFIC SOUNDS)" "(CAR HONKS)" "BASSEM: (IN ARABIC) Go?" "CAMERAMAN:" "I'm ready." "BASSEM:" "Say "take one" first." "CAMERAMAN:" "Rolling." "MAN:" "Rolling?" "CAMERAMAN:" "Yes, rolling." "PRODUCER:" "Take one!" "MAN:" "Is the sound good?" "PRODUCER:" "Take one!" "Did you come without telling your parents?" "I came without telling my parents." "Would you..." "My father is a former general." "He resigned in August." "He doesn't know that I came to Tahrir Square." "He'll know now." "He'll know now!" "Hi, Dad!" "Hello?" "Shh." "My mother." "(LAUGHING)" "No, I'm at the office." "(LAUGHING)" "(WHISTLING)" "(PEOPLE CHANTING)" "FEMALE REPORTER:" "(IN ENGLISH) Protesters are back on the streets in Cairo, Egypt." "MALE REPORTER 1:" "Demonstrators staged one of the largest rallies in months." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "Thousands of demonstrators came ready for a new political revolt." "(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)" "(HORNS HONKING)" "MALE REPORTER 3:" "Violent clashes are raging..." "FEMALE REPORTER 2:" "Bloody clashes between protesters and security forces..." "MALE REPORTER 4:" "Since the revolution began last January, more than 1,200 people have died and over 13,000 injured." "(GUNSHOT)" "MALE REPORTER 5:" "President Mubarak stepped down nearly a year ago." "MALE REPORTER 6: ...of President Hosni Mubarak..." "MALE REPORTER 7:" "Since then, the military has remained in power." "MALE REPORTER 8:" "Egyptians are protesting military control." "MALE REPORTER 9:" "...down with military rule." "MALE REPORTER 10: ...against the Egyptian military." "MALE REPORTER 11:" "Protesters say the military isn't transitioning to democracy as it promised." "(PEOPLE CHANTING IN ARABIC)" "ALL:" "There's no freedom under military rule!" "MAN:" "One face mask for a pound!" "Who wants a face mask, it's for one pound." "Blankets were donated yesterday by people who can hardly feed their own kids." "There were Muslims and Christians, liberals, seculars, religious, fundamentalist..." "You should mention "infidels" right after liberals." "(BOTH LAUGH)" "(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)" "The smell is unbearable." "We'll try to get as far as we can." "CAMERAMAN:" "Please God, protect us." "Talk to the people, Bassem." "BASSEM:" "In case you're wondering, Kentucky Fried Chicken is closed." "The police shot teargas bombs from all sides." "They're using the new gas." "It's amazing!" "(LAUGHS)" "It really is!" "Sorry to ruin your comedy." "The patient I was treating died in my arms." "I swear, Dr. Bassem." "The patient died in my hands." "(SIRENS WAILING)" "MAN:" "Don't be afraid, hero." "Put this in your mouth." "Breathe in through your mouth and out through your nose." "BASSEM:" "These people will not be stopped with gas or bullets." "There must be a better way to deal with these people." "MAN:" "Make way!" "He is just a child." "What's happening in this country, whether it's us or it's the army and the police, is so wrong." "We have to make a buffer zone." "This is disgraceful." "They have to stop shooting." "They have to stop shooting." "WOMAN:" "That's Bassem Youssef!" "MAN:" "Give him space to breathe!" "BASSEM:" "My eyes are burning." "There is no excuse for violence." "Come see and talk about what's actually happening." "Stop just believing what you hear on TV." "MAN:" "Give him a tissue!" "He's a doctor." "He knows what to do." "(IN ENGLISH) I became a doctor to please my parents." "My brother's an engineer." "If we had a third brother who was a dentist, we'd be almost a Jewish family." "But we're not." "(LAUGHS)" "(MONITOR BEEPING)" "My job is to cut people open, to see what is inside." "(DOCTORS TALKING INDISTINCTLY)" "BASSEM:" "The cameraman is fainting." "Add it to the bill." "Extra fee, treating cameraman for fainting." "(CHUCKLES)" "I love sarcasm." "It lets me cut through people's facades without spilling any blood." "If I could do anything," "I would have my own comedy show, and be like Jon Stewart." "Make fun of New Jersey..." "Whatever the hell that is." "I would make fun of politics, the president." "There's only one problem." "I live in Egypt." "I grew up under the rule of our benevolent military dictator, Hosni Mubarak, who became the President of Egypt almost 30 years ago." "That's 15 times the average lifespan of your iPhone." "Or six American presidents." "Or, as we call it in Egypt, "his first term."" "(LAUGHS)" "(MUSIC PLAYING) PERFORMERS: ♪ We chose him!" "We chose him!" "♪" "MALE REPORTER 1:" "Hosni Mubarak was formally elected president." "He was the only candidate." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "More than 98% of those who voted marked "Yes" on their ballot." "BASSEM:" "The other 2% of the vote went to hummus." "We love hummus." "And that was that." "We all lived happily ever after." "The End." "No." "Not quite." "MALE REPORTER:" "Mubarak wants to close the gap between the few very rich and the many very poor." "His slogan, "Egypt is for all."" "BASSEM:" "By "Egypt for all," Mubarak meant that everyone is free to say whatever they want." "And as long as you don't piss off authority, you're okay." "Life under Mubarak was like literally being under Mubarak." "(PEOPLE CHANTING IN ARABIC)" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) But, something was changing." "A revolution started in Tunisia." "And we're not going to be upstaged by those adorable little bastards." "MALE REPORTER:" "Winds of change are sweeping through North Africa and the Middle East." "The Arab Spring, protest movements taking root in countries whose authoritarian regimes have never seen such defiance." "BASSEM:" "Thousands of people started taking to the streets." "I watched on TV as crowds started demanding the removal of Hosni Mubarak." "(PEOPLE CHANTING IN ARABIC)" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) I'd never seen a protest before." "There were injuries everywhere." "I decided to go to Tahrir Square, as a doctor, to treat people's wounds." "And I saw two different realities." "The reality that I saw in the streets..." "And the other reality that I saw on television." "(IN ARABIC) The protests in Tahrir Square are ruining Egypt." "MAN:" "They shouldn't even allow the protesters to have water." "WOMAN:" "Someone should set them on fire." "Get a tank." "Fire one shot in the air." "All those cowards will run." "(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) The media was brainwashing the people." "Inciting hate." "Calling these people on the streets spies, operatives, insurgents." "(PEOPLE SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY)" "BASSEM:" "People were being harmed just by speaking their minds." "I was angry that the media could be so irresponsible." "They should be the voice of the people, not the voice of authority." "(PEOPLE CHANTING)" "I never imagined that I would see my country like this." "(IN ARABIC) Change!" "Freedom!" "Equality!" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) And then it happened." "MAN:" "President Hosni Mubarak has decided to step down as President of Egypt." "(CHEERING)" "BASSEM:" "We won." "I never thought I would see this day." "It's going to be a new Egypt." "We will never have a military dictatorship again." "And finally, everyone will have a free voice." "(MEN ARGUING INDISTINCTLY IN ARABIC)" "BASSEM:" "Even though Mubarak left office, the media is still total shit." "They have complete freedom of saying absolute nonsense." "Tell me the story of your special mustache and its relation to journalism." "They're getting away with murder." "And there's no one to stop them." "(ARGUING INDISTINCTLY)" "BASSEM:" "You turned on a TV, and all you saw was people screaming and arguing." "It was a fucking zoo." "So six weeks after Mubarak left office, my friend Tarek, he called me and said, "Let's make a show."" "You opened Pandora's box!" "Bassem is one of my best friends and we've been friends for so long." "And I knew he had something interesting to say." "This is where I started doing my first show ever." "We started the show in my laundry room." "One desk, one camera and a screen with pictures behind it." "We started filming some stuff and put it on the Internet." "I thought at best he would give us 10,000 views on the first week." "He got us 35,000 on the first day." "And he got us five million views in two months." "Everybody was talking about him." "BASSEM:" "It was unprecedented." "It caught fire." "(CLICKS, CHIMES)" "TAREK:" "I mean, something is funny and at the same time it's really about a serious matter." "This was something that was very new." "I was very excited that people are watching me, but it was scary." "I didn't know how to deal with this." "But I liked doing it because I was taking revenge against the lies and the manipulation of the media." "And it felt the right thing to do." "Up until then, Egyptians were never allowed to make fun of authority or the media." "Because when you laugh at authority, it won't be easy to control us anymore." "MAN: (IN ARABIC) Have you received any criticism from the government?" "Criticism from the government?" "MAN: (IN ENGLISH) Would you tell the people, or would you just stop the show?" "(IN ARABIC) It depends on which way they threaten me." "(PEOPLE LAUGH)" "I could just disappear and won't be able to do anything about it." "(APPLAUSE)" "(IN ENGLISH) TV stations started making offers." "So, I had to make a decision, continue my stable career as a surgeon or break my parents' hearts and become a full-time comedian." "The choice was easy." "MALE ANNOUNCER: (IN ARABIC) And now the show, The Show with Bassem Youssef!" "Welcome to the first episode of the show, The Show." "That's the name of the show." "The Show." "(MAN CHUCKLING))" "(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)" "(BASSEM SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON COMPUTER)" "Ma'am, what are you carrying?" "I have spray bottles." "I'm taking them to the clinic." "I'd like to know, who is funding you?" "My source of funding?" "America, of course, and Mossad, and Iran." "Is that all?" "(LAUGHING)" "ANDEEL:" "I remember the first time I saw Bassem Youssef's show," "I saw it as something on my side." "He was encouraging people to be more critical toward authorities." "It's someone who's saying things that are similar to what we're saying to each other." "Things that are not usually on TV, things that are critical of the media and the way it controls the people's minds." "He's like our guy." "(BASSEM SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ON COMPUTER)" "I think one of the biggest problems that Egypt had before..." "This is not fun, so... (PURRING)" "(CHUCKLES)" "Anyways, it was very dangerous to have a show under Mubarak." "When they sent people to jail, like journalists, or activists..." "That killed hope in people." "That made people forget that change could happen." "Since the revolution, everything have changed." "Will there be democracy in the future or not?" "Will there be freedom of speech or not?" "We've been waiting for something to happen." "The revolution is going through a very critical moment." "We still don't know who is running for president." "This is the beginning of the future." "(CHILD BABBLES) Mmm-hmm." "(KISSES)" "(CAMERAMAN CHUCKLES)" "(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)" "Yay!" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "Bestselling author, my guest tonight, his new book is called" "David and Goliath:" "Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants." "CHILD:" "Ah!" "Ah!" "BASSEM:" "My wife kind of got screwed." "She thought she was marrying a doctor, and she ended up with a guy who tells jokes for a living." "(LAUGHING)" "(BASSEM CHUCKLES)" "She's a show-off." "Yeah, just like her daddy. (LAUGHS)" "(CHUCKLES)" "I hope that our daughter grows into a young woman who has her own mind." "It's important to me that Nadia understands freedom of expression." "Right now, "freedom of expression" just means one thing, pooping wherever she wants." "We'll be right back." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "(IN ARABIC) I wasn't this nervous on my wedding day." "(IN ENGLISH) You're the Jon Stewart of Egypt!" "What's up, man?" "All right!" "He doesn't know me." "I told him to say that." "(IN ARABIC) Praise be to God." "Something I've been dreaming of doing." "Praise be to God." "Finally, I'm here." "The moment I have been waiting for." "I will enter the studio of Jon Stewart," "The Daily Show." "CAMERAMAN: (IN ARABIC) Crazy bastard." "(LAUGHING)" "(IN ENGLISH) Welcome to The Daily Show!" "My name is Jon..." "Bassem Youssef." "(WOMAN LAUGHING)" "We're the same height." "WOMAN:" "Yeah." "All right." "Is that warm enough?" "Because we have a fleece as well." "Well, the thing is..." "A Snuggie." "As a matter of fact, I'm actually..." "I'm burning hot, but I don't wanna get it off." "Is my name in the back?" "No, no..." "Let me see the back thing, you!" "Have fun." "JON:" "See you guys down there." "BASSEM:" "Okay." "(IN ARABIC) He's so cute and he's so short." "(CHUCKLES)" "Just like me, I'm short, too." "No one said I'm tall." "(LAUGHS)" "(CHUCKLES)" "What is this?" "Looks like they got us gifts." "(IN ENGLISH) Popcorn." "Showers... (IN ARABIC) You found this stuff here?" "Yes, this stuff probably belongs to us now." "But let's wait to make sure." "So here's what's going on." "Hosni Mubarak was Egypt's leader for 30 years." "He was immensely popular amongst his people, typically winning elections between 98% and 127% of the vote." "He was so beloved, so popular, that last winter his people demanded he take a well-deserved retirement." "The time of dictatorship in Egypt is done." "(WHOOPS)" "(SNAPS FINGERS)" "(LAUGHS)" "(SNAPS FINGERS)" "(KNOCK AT DOOR)" "My guest tonight, he is a heart surgeon who also hosts a satirical news program in Egypt, called Al Bernameg." "Good luck, kid!" "Thank you." "JON:" "All right." "Please welcome Bassem Youssef!" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "Hello!" "Oh, my God!" "Come and sit." "Yay!" "Wow!" "You've got live audience." "Yes!" "(CHEERING)" "JON:" "Now, you don't have an audience." "No, we are actually trying to do that next year." "We're going to be the first Arab satirical political show with live audience, which is huge." "It's very interesting that the medias in our countries, that are not that different..." "They're sort of an establishment media and then there's what's going on in the street." "And the twain don't really meet." "Yes." "It has been extremely funny, and hilarious to watch the media right now." "I mean, back in Egypt." "It's the same, we're not very much different." "JON:" "No." "BASSEM:" "But can I ask a question?" "Yeah, yeah, yes." "Last week, did you have Catherine Zeta-Jones here?" "Catherine Zeta-Jones was in your seat, sir." "In this seat?" "Wow!" "Your very seat." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "Nice." "Yeah." "(IN ARABIC) I stole the mug." "(LAUGHS)" "(IN ENGLISH) Thank you, sir." "Thank you for coming in." "Thank you very much." "Thank you." "I have something for you." "I've got something for you, too." "This could take a while." "Here we go." "So." "This was done by the craftsmen of Egypt." "Actually, they live in the slums, but they're trying to improve their lives." "But they didn't do the best thing ever." "So, this is handmade." "Oh, yeah, baby!" "It doesn't look that good, but it's handmade." "MAN:" "That is awesome." "BASSEM:" "It's actually..." "It's all handmade." "Look at that." "It's beautiful." "I know it doesn't look like you." "But..." "No, this looks..." "It looks exactly..." "This looks exactly like me if I was going to brutally repress some people." "(PEOPLE LAUGH)" "You give the best gifts." "This is wonderful." "BASSEM:" "Hello!" "(APPLAUSE)" "My team is growing." "Since a show like this has never been done before, they are all amateurs." "Former lawyers, architects and recent graduates." "We're part of the writers team, all three of us." "And I'm Bassem's stunt double." "ANDEEL:" "I'm going to be creating the thing that I was watching and enjoying and being a fan of." "Comedy and satire work really, really well in the moments where you're not supposed to laugh." "Like the funniest joke ever is the joke that's told in a funeral." "I don't watch TV, I hate TV." "But this, this is the only show that matters." "TARIQ:" "The whole team is not just friends, we're family, we're not just friends." "(LAUGHING)" "TARIQ:" "There is no other show like this." "My whole family is proud." "And they sit and watch the show." "Well, the good thing about the program is that I can speak my mind and talk about everything that's happening right now with this country." "HEND:" "We're like the dream team." "We found each other." "Here in Egypt, you have to be very brave and willing to go to jail." "So, I think it's very brave, from Bassem." "I think so." "It's very brave of him." "BASSEM:" "I can't wait to start our new season." "We will have a new studio, a new live audience," "and a new president who I can make fun of." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "It could be a day that begins a brand-new era in the Middle East, but we're really not sure what kind of era it's going to be yet because this is election day in Egypt." "BASSEM:" "This is the first time that we have a real election." "And we have no idea who will win." "(CHEERING)" "Mohamed Morsi of the Muslim Brotherhood is elected President." "I don't love Morsi." "But he would provide great material." "He's like our George W. Bush." "(IN ARABIC) No one's opinion will ever be silenced while I'm here." "We will never suppress anyone's opinions." "Never!" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) I think Egypt is on a good path for comedy." "(IN ARABIC) God is great!" "We now have a president with a beard." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)" "It's a little bit short, but is better than nothing." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "Don't be angry, we can bear with him." "Maybe one day it will grow longer." "It's not in good shape now." "It's small, but still can satisfy you." "(APPLAUSE)" "The president is now in charge of the legislative, executive and judiciary branches." "That's why his name isn't President Morsi." "His name is Super Morsi." "He is able, in a sarcastic way, to expose the flaws in the society." "(APPLAUSE)" "He's a doctor that heals us from the political state we're facing." "MALE REPORTER:" "In front of the presidential palace, thousands of the President's supporters attacking tens of opponents sitting-in." "They found condoms in these protesters' tents." "They found these "things" in the tents..." "I don't know what's it called." "God forgive me." "I'm not interested in these things." "Me neither, I'm not interested in these "things" at all." "At all." "People now understand democracy because of Bassem." "Some people ask me," ""Do I have permission to kill Bassem Youssef?"" "I answer them, "Not now."" ""Not now"?" "Thanks for your good manners." "(LAUGHING)" "MAN:" "As faculty president, I offer Mohamed Morsi this doctorate." "(APPLAUSE)" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING AND LAUGHING)" "It sounds like this new Egyptian president," "Mohamed Morsi, has got his hands full." "In Egypt, public prosecutors ordered the arrest of popular television presenter," "Bassem Youssef." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "The show mocked him when he was awarded an honorary degree in Pakistan, and also took aim at the President's less-than-fluent English." "Making fun of the president's hats and less-than-fluent English?" "That was my entire career for eight years." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING AND LAUGHING)" "MALE REPORTER:" "The Egyptian government appears to be cracking down on critics." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "Egypt's Prosecutor General has issued a warrant for Youssef's arrest." "MALE REPORTER 3:" "They're saying that he has insulted President Mohamed Morsi..." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "Insulting Islam and President Mohamed Morsi." "MALE REPORTER 4:" "That a comedian would be a wanted man is itself an astonishing thing." "I don't know if they're gonna come and get me." "And I don't want to expose my wife to that." "So I call my wife and told her to stay over at her parents' house." "I'm going to turn myself in." "The people are waiting every week to see how I comment on events." "We are the voice of the people." "I need to show them what happens when you go after a joker." "MALE REPORTER: (IN ARABIC) Bassem Youssef turned himself in to the District Attorney." "There's a warrant charging him with contempt of Islam and insulting the president, Mohamed Morsi." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "What's interesting is that Bassem Youssef is heading there with a very big hat." "(PEOPLE CHANTING)" "ALL:" "Morsi's arresting revolutionaries." "WOMEN:" "Bassem is one of us and we're not leaving him!" "So what if Bassem Youssef is expressing his feelings and opinions with sarcasm?" "All he is doing is expressing our thoughts and feelings." "(PEOPLE CHANTING)" "MAN:" "Bassem, over here!" "They let you go!" "Raise your hands!" "Bassem!" "Bassem!" "Bassem!" "Bassem!" "AUDIENCE: (CHEERING) Bassem!" "Bassem!" "Bassem!" "Bassem!" "The court dismissed the case, so, we're staying on the air with you, for now." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)" "(IN ENGLISH) The show is working, and people are listening." "MALE REPORTER:" "Bassem Youssef is the most popular man in Egypt." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "Bassem Youssef is known as "Egypt's Jon Stewart"." "MALE REPORTER 3:" "Thirty million viewers for his weekly program." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "40% of the entire population is watching." "MALE REPORTER 4:" "Jon Stewart averages two million viewers a night." "MALE REPORTER 5:" "Nobody has seen anything like it anywhere in the Arab world." "BASSEM:" "We are showing that the government and the media can't just decide someone is an enemy and get rid of them." "When you go after a joker, the joke is on you." "MORSI: (IN ARABIC) Be optimistic!" "I see prosperity in the future." "Be optimistic!" "The Egyptian people are rising." "Mr. President," "I want to tell you something." "I don't want to shock you with annoying words about our Egypt." "Mr. President, the country is fucked up." "Believe me!" "Let me show you." "Things are getting worse economically, socially, and politically." "Be optimistic." "Gas lines are everywhere." "Be optimistic." "Egypt's economic crisis is worsening." "Be optimistic." "This is the Egypt we know well." "(IN ENGLISH) The people are through with Morsi." "(IN ARABIC) We don't want you anymore!" "We've had enough." "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) Morsi is stepping all over people right now." "The Muslim Brotherhood consider themselves much more pure than anyone else." "(IN ARABIC) People who are fighting the Muslim Brotherhood are fighting Islam." "Anyone against Morsi is committing treason against the country, God and Muslims." "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) They want everyone to be more conservative." "You can't use your religion to justify controlling people." "People are feeling alienated." "And with a president working against the will of the people, who else can we turn to?" "Sisi." "Remember that name. "Sisi."" "Where was I?" "The President is abusing his power." "Morsi even made a declaration that says he's allowed to change the Constitution." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "Morsi's decision to amend the Constitution will make it impossible for judicial courts to overturn his decisions." "Morsi's move to grant himself sweeping powers, it's straight out of former President Hosni Mubarak's playbook." "(IN ARABIC) Down with the rule of the Muslim Brotherhood!" "ALL:" "We can't even afford bread." "(CARS HONKING HORNS)" "(AL BERNAMEG THEME MUSIC PLAYING ON TV)" "(TV AUDIENCE APPLAUDS AND CHEERS)" "TAREK:" "Watching every episode is always a conflict in my family." "They have a different political affiliation." "My family likes Morsi." "Every episode I would say," ""Oh my God, what will my father say?" "What will my brother do?"" "I live in a family house, the same building where my father is and my brother is." "We usually had Saturday breakfast, and I stopped doing so." "I switched my breakfast to be on a Friday morning, before the airing of the episode." "And I did this for just..." "To avoid any eye contact on the next day." "(MUSIC PLAYING ON TV)" "(BASSEM SINGING)" "Al Bernameg." "It's not a choice." "Now, it's a lifestyle." "It's, like, this is my life, this is what I do." "(BASSEM SPEAKING IN ARABIC ON TV)" "FEMALE REPORTER:" "Morsi formed a legal team, with himself as the head, to review his own decisions." "So, I'm the President." "I've issued a decision." "I sent it to the review committee which is led by me." "So it returns to me." "Who is the prince who issued this decision?" "(AUDIENCE LAUGHS AND APPLAUDS)" "(IN ENGLISH) I feel there is something going on, and it's big." "We're expecting someone who is very important but we don't know who is it now." "Obviously someone very special, someone very big." "Something big will happen." "We don't know yet." "I don't know." "Everybody's running." "I don't know." "Things are disappearing." "It's Justin Bieber." "I love you, Biebs!" "First, I thought it was Morsi, but from the preparations," "I think it's somebody more important." "For security reasons..." "(IN ARABIC) And I'm not joking." "(IN ENGLISH) Nobody says anything." "(IN ARABIC) Nobody tweet." "Nobody text." ""Oh, my God, this person is coming!" And all that nonsense." "Do you understand?" "Especially you." "I don't trust you." "(ALL LAUGHING)" "I really don't trust you." "Nobody say anything now or until the episode airs." "Okay?" "Jon Stewart." "(ALL CHEERING)" "(IN ENGLISH) Let's do this, baby!" "(ALL CHEERING)" "(IN ARABIC) Thank you." "(IN ENGLISH) I've come here to show you my respect." "The job you guys do is incredible." "What you put on every week is inspiring to me, and I love it." "(ALL CHEERING)" "FLOOR MANAGER:" "(IN ARABIC) In five, four, three, two, one..." "Record." "Play VTR." "BASSEM:" "Welcome to Cinema Radio Theatre and to the show, The Show." "And now, the show, The Show with Bassem Youssef!" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "MAN: "Praise me" is also slang for "fuck me" in Arabic." "JON: (IN ENGLISH) All right." "(IN ARABIC) "I am a humble man."" "(IN ENGLISH) I am just trying to practice." "(IN ARABIC) "I am a humble man."" "(IN ENGLISH) Okay." "Yes." "Does that make sense?" "Yes." "(IN ARABIC) "I am a humble man."" ""No need for anyone to glorify me."" "Okay." ""I don't like to be praised." (LAUGHS)" "Okay." ""I'm simple."" "(IN ENGLISH) Can you see?" "(IN ARABIC) Can you see?" "We got the cue." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "BASSEM:" "Bring me the spy!" "(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)" "(IN ENGLISH) Ladies and gentlemen, Jon Stewart!" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING LOUDLY)" "(IN ARABIC) I don't like to be praised." "I don't like to be praised." "BASSEM:" "Does satire puts you, like, gets you into trouble?" "I mean what about the love you get from the people?" "I'll tell you this." "It doesn't get me into the kind of trouble that it gets you into." "(BASSEM CHUCKLES)" "If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime." "You know, there's an expression, I don't know if you have it," ""Adding insult to injury."" "Yes, maybe it is an insult, but it is not an injury." "A joke has never ridden a motorcycle into a crowd with a baton." "A joke has never shot teargas to a group of people in a park." "It's just talk." "(AUDIENCE CHEERS)" "ALL: (IN ARABIC) That is it." "Step down!" "Step down!" "Step down!" "MAN:" "Morsi Coward." "Morsi is a spy for the Americans." "ALL: (CHANTING) Go away!" "Go away!" "All we can do is maintain our stand and stay in the street until he leaves." "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) I want Morsi and his people out." "But are we really going to install Democracy 2.0 so soon?" "(IN ARABIC) He's going to leave." "The problem is what comes after." "We don't know." "It's just like when we told Mubarak to leave." "Honestly, we don't know what we'll do after this." "Let's just worry about him leaving first." "The Armed Forces couldn't cover our ears or close our eyes to the movement and calls of the masses of Egyptian people." "From all the corners of Egypt, and its cities and villages." "This road map includes the following." "Suspending the constitution provisionally." "(CHEERING)" "MALE REPORTER:" "(IN ENGLISH) The military removed Mohamed Morsi, suspended the Constitution." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "The country's first freely elected president, deposed." "ALL: (IN ARABIC) ♪ My country, my country, my country" "♪ You have my love and my heart ♪" "MALE REPORTER: (IN ENGLISH) There's little question the most popular man in Egypt these days is Field Marshall Abdel Fattah El-Sisi." "His name is praised in song." "His face plastered on walls, storefronts, even candy." "Sometimes, it's next to women's underwear." "Sometimes, it's on it." "BASSEM:" "Of course people like him." "After the Muslim Brotherhood, we could be led by Martians, and people would still be happy." "Egypt's army has only one mission." "Protecting Egyptians from our enemies, both outside and inside Egypt." "WOMAN:" "Bassem, we're going to grab coffee." "Okay, no problem." "The Muslim Brotherhood made a major mistake." "People value their personal freedom over freedom of expression." "What did the Brotherhood come and do?" ""Follow Islamic law!"" ""Don't wear this." "Don't do this."" ""This is forbidden."" "People were fed up." "So now, people are seeing a military country and they're happy." "Why?" "Because they're not telling you what to wear." "(LAUGHING)" "(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)" "Why are you pulling my hair?" "I'm not." "Let me put this in your hair." "Let's just try it." "No, I don't want to." "(IN ENGLISH) Many girls who used to wear hijab, they are taking it off now." "It's kind of a personal decision." "It's only for me and God." "I don't feel like doing it anymore." "So, I decided to take it off." "I work at the show because I feel that it's a good way to express how I feel and how I want my country to be." "I don't think that there is something that we should not talk about or criticize." "Like what's happening right now with General Sisi." "He took Morsi down and everyone is acting that he is like a god or something." "Thank you, General Sisi, but I don't want to act like you are a god." "I don't want to create another pharaoh, like what we have done before with Mubarak." "I don't want this to be..." "I don't want this to happen again." "(HORNS HONKING)" "BASSEM:" "Many of us are relieved Morsi is out." "But since he was elected democratically, some people are saying it was a coup." "But the military and General Sisi says it wasn't a coup." "Supporters of Morsi and the Muslim Brotherhood started taking to the streets." "(CHANTING)" "And General Sisi sent troops in to restore order." "(GUN FIRES)" "(GAS HISSING)" "(PEOPLE CLAMORING)" "FEMALE REPORTER:" "Clashes between security forces and protesters who support ousted president, Mohamed Morsi, erupting this morning." "MALE REPORTER:" "Sisi's forces fired on protesters with teargas and then, automatic weapons." "MAN:" "We are fighting for principle, for the president we elected." "(SIRENS WAILING)" "Never..." "It doesn't matter who." "(AUTOMATIC GUNFIRE)" "(GUNSHOT)" "We heard that someone died or that someone was shot somewhere just beside us." "(PEOPLE TALKING INDISTINCTLY)" "(BABY CRYING)" "You don't know what to do with them." "Someone is dying there, and someone..." "And we're having fun here, and we are making fun of politics." "(MAN SHOUTING)" "(GUNSHOTS)" "With all the really, really sad events that are happening here, you are obligated to comment on them." "All you could say or do is just be like," ""Good morning, people." "Your life is shit."" "(EXPLOSION)" "MALE REPORTER:" "No one has admitted to being behind the bombing." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "There's so much confusion there right now as to who really is behind these attacks." "REPORTER 3:" "The authorities continue to blame the Muslim Brotherhood." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "The group has denied any involvement." "MALE REPORTER 4:" "Egypt is unraveling." "(IN ARABIC) How can you guarantee our theater won't be bombed?" "More security won't make any difference." "Anything can happen here." "It's expected." "Normal." "It wouldn't be a surprise if we were bombed." "Somebody has to come out and talk about this." "We can't just ignore it." "(IN ENGLISH) I have absolutely no manual to do this." "I don't know if there's gonna be an explosion where people die anytime right now, anywhere in Egypt," "or at the office or whatever." "And we're gonna come out and talk about what happened." "How can you make fun of it?" "It's like 9/11 every day here." "MALE REPORTER:" "Egypt has banned demonstrations." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "Security forces have locked down Tahrir Square." "MALE REPORTER 3:" "Blocked every entrance to Tahrir Square." "MALE REPORTER 4:" "The city of Cairo is very much on a high alert basis, as are other cities throughout Egypt." "BASSEM: (IN ARABIC) No protests are allowed because the army claims they don't want violence." "OSAMA:" "But people won't be violent." "They closed the square and now you want to break in?" "This is violence." "They only closed it to ban demonstrations." "BASSEM:" "Do you know what Einstein said?" "Stupidity is to do something, fail, and do it the same way again." "Change your method!" "Enough!" "You have to consider how you're deemed by society." "Win people over." "Egypt has lots of people supporting General Sisi." "It's not just military might." "People love the military." "In a completely different field." "It's a completely different society." "You have to use a different strategy or it won't work." "Know what I'm saying?" "No, hold on." "BASSEM:" "Listen to me, listen." "The prophets were sent when people worshipped idols." "Can anyone say that idol worship is right?" "OSAMA:" "No." "Did the prophet change people overnight?" "OSAMA:" "No." "No." "He took his time with them." "He took his time with them!" "No, he confronted them." "There's time to confront and time to be smart." "Prove there's a good alternative." "You have to spread awareness." "The solution may not be marches and demonstrations." "The solution could be reaching out to people." "You've been using the wrong strategy for two years." "We'll be here until tomorrow." "OSAMA:" "We have different methods, but we have to agree on moral principles, right?" "BASSEM:" "Yeah, but principles don't change things." "You have to put them in motion." "The way you're implementing them now is wrong." "Find a different way." "OSAMA:" "I agree with you!" "If you agree with me, then why are we... (PEOPLE LAUGHING)" "(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)" "BASSEM:" "Huddle, huddle." "In the name of God." "A comedy show..." "We're doing something different." "Hopefully, it will be something successful and great." "The most important thing is that we go on." "Persistence is the best method for success." "All eyes are on us, but please... (IN ENGLISH) Don't give in to the negative energy." "(IN ARABIC) You're our team." "Don't let anyone have an effect on you." "God willing, this is a new beginning." "A new season." "Hopefully we'll be together for two, three, four, 10, up to 14 years." "God willing." "Good luck, guys." "(CREW CHEERING)" "ALL:" "We love you, Bassem." "Okay, guys, let's start." "♪ After the revolution came a new president, E-I-E-I-O" "♪ He thought we were fools E-I-E-I-O" "♪ He was elected We wanted to try his ideas" "♪ But the president turned out to be a liar E-I-E-I-O" "♪ His ideas turned out to be stupid E-I-E-I-O" "♪ And he scared people with terrorism E-I-E-I-O" "♪ Morsi said, "Why are you kicking me out?" "I'm a legitimate president"" "♪ He ignored the people so they took to the streets" "♪ He went too far in his stupidity" "We voted for him and let him lead" "♪ It turns out he's a dildo ♪" "(CHEERING)" "(IN ENGLISH) This is the show that anyone would kill to get a seat in, so..." "I wanna watch Bassem Youssef live." "I mean, he's awesome on TV." "He gives a different side of things." "When you're looking at things negatively all the time, every day, it's nice to look at it in a funny way." "MAN:" "I didn't watch the show much." "I was just not happy about him using so much profanity." "I'm here to understand what is he, what is he going to say, about General Sisi in particular." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "WOMAN: (IN ARABIC) It is a piece of chocolate with a picture of General Sisi." "Sir, please tell us about your work." "We really liked the idea of General Sisi on chocolate." "I'm going to give you a lot." "I don't like chocolate." "A few kilos." "A quarter kilo is fine." "It tastes good." "Half a kilo." "You don't like Sisi?" "Give me all you have." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "♪ Sisi fired off a statement" "♪ He decided to fuck the Brotherhood" "♪ He told him "You have two more days"" "♪ Morsi said, "Why are you kicking me out?" "♪ "I'm a legitimate president" He ignored the people!" "They protested" "♪ He's gone too far in his stupidity" "♪ And everyone fought He was elected to lead" "♪ But it turned out to be a big trap The people became happy" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "♪ Sisi fought terrorism And that's why the coup happened ♪" "(VOCALIZING)" "Come here, boy." "Come here." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "What?" "What did you say?" "Sisi fought terrorism." "No, that was good." "Clap." "That kind of thing makes them happy." "What did you say after that?" "And that's why he led a coup." "What's going on, man?" "Shh." "What?" "Shh." "Get off." "What?" "Are you Brotherhood?" "Brotherhood?" "I'm Christian!" "(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)" "So what?" "Obama is Brotherhood and he's the President of America." "Here at The Show we find ourselves under a lot of pressure." "We are a free voice." "We can't have someone telling us what and what not to say." "We will not be afraid." "We will say what we want in a loud voice!" "We want freedom!" "Freedom in the wrong hands is bad, you know." "Why did you hit me so hard, you ass?" "(CHUCKLES)" "I'm happy that you were able to watch this episode live." "You're the ones who made this happen." "It's an honor." "I'm truly very happy." "Ease up a little." "The authorities are giving the network a hard time." "Thank you very much for coming." "I am very happy you finally visited the theater." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "Yesterday was a remarkable day." "Bassem Youssef's new season started." "FEMALE REPORTER 2:" "Bassem Youssef's show is considered a real test of how open the current regime is to criticism, and whether political satire shows can become part of Egyptian culture after the revolution." "It was a very bad episode, it wasn't good." "He was talking about the regime." "He was talking about our leader." "I'm happy he's back and many people were happy, too." "Morsi's mistakes made Bassem popular." "He can't do the same with the current regime because they have huge support." "The episode was good." "He disrespects people." "It's condescending and rude." "If you don't respect us, we have no reason to watch you." "We have filed complaints to the General" "Prosecutor and the Military Prosecutor against this man who distorts the image of Egypt." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "How far can Egypt's Jon Stewart go without being thrown in jail?" "We received a statement from our Board of Directors." "After the latest episode of The Show with Dr. Bassem Youssef, the CBC declares that it will always support the national sentiment and stand by the public's will." "CBC will not use any material that is distasteful or mocks the feelings of the Egyptian public." "Or people of prominence." "A news anchor called to support me, but he doesn't want to say it publicly." "(IN ENGLISH) It's very hard to take the negative comments and to take the negative feedback and to keep continuing without feeling at least..." "At least frustrated for a while." "Screw them." "(LAUGHS)" "CAMERAMAN:" "More diplomatic answer." "Uh, I don't give a shit." "(LAUGHS)" "That was really diplomatic." "We are being attacked by state media, even privately-owned channel..." "Yeah." "...even the channel we are on." "MIRAL:" "This is what's happening right now." "It's either you like the Army or you love the Army and Sisi." "Or, if you don't like Sisi then you don't like the Army." "WOMAN:" "You're a traitor." "Yeah." "(IN ARABIC) Mr. Bassem!" "Mr. Bassem!" "ALL:" "Mr. Bassem!" "Mr. Bassem!" "MAN:" "Why did you insult the Egyptian people?" "ALL:" "Why did you insult the Egyptian people?" "MAN:" "Tell me, why did you insult Sisi?" "Sisi." "Sisi." "(MAN AND PEOPLE CONTINUE SHOUTING)" "BASSEM:" "Eighteen people." "(INDISTINCT TALKING, LAUGHING)" "His thing is that big!" "I know," "I saw it." "(IN ENGLISH) There's an interim president." "But Sisi and the military are the ones really running the show." "MALE REPORTER:" "Ultra-nationalist fervor has swept the nation." "BASSEM:" "Lots of people like General Sisi." "They think that he will restore calm and safety." "MALE REPORTER:" "There is a large number of people who support Sisi and they are eager to have a strong man, a military man come back and restore some semblance of order here." "(IN ARABIC) With Sisi we feel safe and secure so we can start working and do projects." "BASSEM:" "Having Sisi as a leader just means going back to military control." "MALE REPORTER:" "Sisi and the Egyptian military launched a massive crackdown on any form of dissent." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "The crackdown on Human Rights Organizations." "The crackdown on the media." "BASSEM:" "It is becoming scary to be on TV." "MALE REPORTER:" "Questions about just how free the media can now be in Egypt under the new transitional government that's being formed." "MALE TRANSLATOR:" "It takes a long time before you're able to affect and control the media." "We're working on this." "BASSEM:" "To Sisi, freedom of expression is nothing but an obstacle." "For the first time, I feel that I'm being watched." "I get a call from Tarek and he's telling me that they arrested his dad." "I got this phone call from my mother." "She said, "They came and they took your father from home."" "There's not a single accusation." "Not a single proper accusation." "The lawyer told us that there is no case." "And he thinks that they did that to pressure me." "I get these Facebook messages from my "friends," or my older friends, who tell me that I directly was responsible for putting my father in prison." "Is it because of Al Bernameg?" "It's a good target." "It's an easy target." "BASSEM:" "Am I now a reason for people being arrested?" "Nadia!" "Ahh!" "Daddy!" "Daddy!" "(CHUCKLES)" "(IN ARABIC) Come here." "Ahhhh." "Ahhhh." "Again." "Ahh..." "(CHUCKLES)" "Ahh..." "Ahh... (LAUGHS)" "HALA: (IN ENGLISH) I can't enjoy the show like the other people do because each time I watch the show" "I feel really worried that..." "What will people think?" "Will someone, like, hurt him for saying this?" "She can't be totally objective about it." "Yeah." "I want this to end but at the same time" "I don't want this to end because I know he loves what he's doing and a lot of people are looking up to him." "AYMAN:" "The staff won't come here tomorrow." "WOMAN:" "Why is that?" "For their safety." "All of us, we're not coming tomorrow?" "AYSHA:" "No, we're not." "MIRAL:" "Everyone?" "AYSHA:" "No, not everyone, but it's fine to work from home if you want to because it could be safer." "What are we going to do?" "WOMAN 1:" "I'm scared." "WOMAN 2:" "You're scared?" "HEND:" "Is everyone coming?" "Are you coming?" "INJY:" "Yes." "Are you coming?" "(CAR HONKING)" "MAN:" "Bassem Youssef, you coward!" "CROWD:" "Bassem Youssef, you coward!" "Don't mess with the Egyptian army and Sisi!" "Don't mess with the Egyptian army!" "(TALKING INDISTINCTLY)" "WOMAN:" "They misunderstood it completely." "I'm scared." "He's a clown." "He's an American spy." ""An American spy"!" "I still love Bassem Youssef." "You love him?" "Of course." "Then you're like him." "What?" "No, he didn't say anything wrong." "You're brainwashed." ""Brainwashed"?" "Did you forget what he did with the Brotherhood?" "Suddenly, you are against the man who fought the Brotherhood." "WOMAN:" "You're a spy." "WOMAN:" "Miral, come here." "They can see you." "(MOUTHING) I'm hidden." "I'm hidden." "WOMAN:" "Leave, you bastard." "Fuck your mother." "I'll show you, motherfucker!" "ALL: (IN ENGLISH) ♪ Happy birthday to you" "♪ Happy birthday to you" "♪ Happy birthday to Tariq" "♪ Happy birthday ♪" "MIRAL:" "Happy birthday." "Make a wish?" "TARIQ:" "Thank you!" "(ALL CHEERING)" "WOMAN:" "Let's go throw it at the protesters." "ALL: (IN ARABIC) Let him hear!" "Let him hear!" "The revolutionaries will kill Bassem!" "(IN ENGLISH) So funny." "Happy birthday to you!" "Happy birthday." "(CROWD CHANTING)" "FARIDA: (IN ARABIC) Oh, my God, they frighten me." "When did it become such a big crowd?" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) In the time of panic and fear, satire is very difficult to swallow, very difficult to digest." "I don't know how will this fly." "BASSEM: (IN ARABIC) It's sad, we're the top news in the country." "Has the country become so ridiculous?" "SARAH:" "They sent a reporter and he keeps talking." "AYMAN:" "What's he saying?" "Raise the volume." "BASSEM:" "Let's get to work." "Come on, guys." "We have to go over the script." "What's everyone doing?" "We need to do the rewrite." "Can you please stop leaving food here?" "Why are you filming?" "Can you please stop leaving food here?" "There's no ventilation." "The room gets stuffy." "Never leave food here." "Come on, boys." "CAMERAMAN:" "Did anyone recognize you?" "The officer suggested we leave." "I don't know what to do." "I'm afraid." "(IN ENGLISH)We didn't used to come frequently..." "Last season, okay?" "But, like, we'd come now more frequently because we're a little bit worried about him." "I am proud of him." "(IN ARABIC) Proud." "(PEOPLE CHEERING)" "Welcome to the show, The Show." "First I want to thank you." "Despite what's going on outside, you made it inside!" "I want to correct something." "There are actually no protests against us." "Those mad people outside who are cursing us, they just want to attend the show." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)" "Certainly, all of you heard the reactions." "You've heard CBC TV's statement about The Show." "There are things much more important in this country." "Our future." "What should we do?" "What should we do tomorrow?" "What should we do?" "They're fucking us with the Constitution!" "They're fucking us with the election!" "Fucking us with traffic!" "Fucked by everything!" "Wait until your channel fucks you and makes a statement about you, too." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "Can anybody open this for us?" "Or shall we go this way?" "How will you get me out?" "MALE REPORTER:" "A statement from the board of directors." "We were shocked by the content that we received for tonight's episode." "So, the board of directors has decided to stop broadcasting the show, The Show." "(CROWD CHANTING)" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) I had a meeting with the head of CBC and he told me that I can keep Al Bernameg as long as I stop making fun of authority." "And, um..." "I cannot do that." "Every single TV channel, every single show, they are praising Sisi." "Making him into a prophet, a savior, a godsend." "I will not just be another mouthpiece for the government." "This show is about holding authority accountable." "Regardless of who's in charge." "I have to continue because, maybe people, if they laugh at their differences, they can laugh at each other instead of hating each other." "ANDEEL:" "If the show got canceled for good, that would be a very strong message to my landlord." "(LAUGHS)" "This is Bassem Youssef." "He is about to be stepped on by this giant, freaky creature." "It is a very famous symbol of oppression, or, like, injustice." "Right before Bassem is being stepped on, he is tickling this giant with this feather." "This is, in my opinion, what the thing is all about." "You have giants who want to crush people." "And they're just using whatever tool or whatever mean you have to counter this effort." "Your thoughts, your ideas, anything." "MALE REPORTER:" "After three months off the air," "Bassem found another network willing to take the risk." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "Big test for freedom of speech here, in Egypt, and freedom to be funny." "Freedom of speech doesn't seem to be absolute." "How long authorities will tolerate Youssef's show depends on how far he decides to push the envelope." "(IN ARABIC) The Show will be back on the air on Friday, February 7th on MBC TV." "MAN:" "What are you doing?" "What are you doing?" "(PEOPLE LAUGHING)" "BASSEM:" "Ready?" "Come on, guys." "Come here." "It's a new season." "As you know, making this show is not easy." "We are standing alone, facing many critics." "I just want you to be sure and confident about what we deliver." "I hope we will continue." "I'm not sure about that one." "(IN ENGLISH) Believe in what you do." "This is my message to you." "(IN ARABIC) God willing, good luck." "SHADI:" "We are Bassem-ers!" "We are Bassem-ers!" "We are Bassem-ers!" "(CHUCKLES)" "No one chanted with him!" "(PEOPLE LAUGHING)" "Welcome to the show, The Show." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "Welcome to the show, The Show." "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "We're going to continue." "We'll say whatever we want, and fear no one!" "Yes!" "We will fear no one." "But there are some people who get upset when we mention their names." "So, it's better if we avoid... (LAUGHING)" "Sisi, he hasn't decided yet if he will run for president." "Which is why we wrote two scripts." "The first script is if General Sisi doesn't run." "Very confusing with so many candidates." "But if he decides to run..." "(APPLAUSE)" "I hope that General Sisi won't run for president." "How I feel is that I want him to keep his current position." "I hope that he won't run for president." "Bring me the bastard that spoke at the end!" "SISI:" "In the name of Allah the Merciful." "Dear people," "I have decided that" "I will run for President for the Arab Republic of Egypt." "Today," "I stand in front of you for the last time wearing the military uniform." "BASSEM:" "Dear audience of The Show," "I stand in front of you today... (AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "Actually I'm sitting, but never mind." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)" "Show me the clip." "MAN:" "Egypt doesn't need Bassem right now." "WOMAN:" "It's not time for a show that divides Egypt." "MAN 2:" "People don't need this show." "WOMAN 2:" "This is not the time for Bassem to criticize." "MAN 3:" "Bassem relaxes people so they remain passive." "You're like yoga!" "What?" "(BOTH LAUGHING) Yoga." "(INHALES DEEPLY)" "WOMAN 3:" "It's not the time to make such critiques." "MAN 4:" "If he had asked me about timing..." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "Abdel Fattah El-Sisi is already getting the presidential treatment from the Egyptian media." "The former Army chief commands more airtime and more deference than his left-wing rival." "BASSEM:" "Who would want to run against the army?" "Anybody who runs against the army is by default a traitor." "It's not fair." "(IN ARABIC) As you know, the upcoming elections will be tough." "It will be a tight race." "Who knows?" "General Sisi might surprise all of us and win!" "(IN ENGLISH) You know, it's just like, it gets to you, it gets to you." "It's scary." "I mean, you know some people, for them fame makes them more narcissistic and more arrogant." "Fame..." "All that fame made me feel is being scared and frightened." "MALE REPORTER:" "It's a new reality for the country's media." "MALE REPORTER 2:" "Dozens of journalists, activists and students have been detained and beaten." "MALE REPORTER 3:" "Journalists sentenced to years in prison for being journalists." "MALE REPORTER 4:" "Are we seeing essentially Mubarak 2.0, in the figure of El-Sisi?" "(JOURNALISTS CLAMORING)" "(IN ARABIC) I talk about a country in danger." "People need to understand this and stand by us." "Anyone thinking otherwise wants to ruin Egypt." "This won't be allowed." "(MUSIC PLAYING)" "Execute Bassem!" "Execute Bassem so I can feel better." "You're insulting the army, and the people." "Bassem, take this!" "He understands what this means in America." "(PEOPLE CHANTING OUTSIDE)" "Can anybody tell us how to practice democracy in a better way?" "Egypt needs an enlightened dictator." "Do you know what a fair dictator is?" "Means he's democratic." "(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "Right after the show's intro the signal was lost." "(IN ENGLISH) There was no signal or anything." "The TV was just black." "MAN: (IN ARABIC) When The Show was on during Morsi and they were making fun of him, they never had their signal jammed." "Why now?" "Someone can disrupt for two hours without the NileSat knowing?" "One who can disrupt the channel without being identified." "This machine is not easy to get, to jam..." "Why is the channel being jammed only when The Show's airing and nothing happens to the commercials?" "Our network is moving to a new satellite because of this." "The regime is scared of a show!" "It's weird." "WOMAN:" "Are we going to move to the porn network?" "(PEOPLE LAUGHING)" "BASSEM: (IN ENGLISH) I am basically in the middle of a crossfire and people either love me to death or hate me to death." "(CHUCKLES)" "I worry about being targeted with my family." "I worry about the people who are close to me." "And with angry, confused and panicking, frightening mob," "we don't know how they will react." "Maybe it won't be worth it to actually continue." "I can't sleep." "I'm not eating." "And now my old network, CBC, is suing me." "They say that I violated my contract by making content that they couldn't air." "It's a very, very confusing time and I don't how we're gonna pull it off." "FEMALE REPORTER:" "(IN ARABIC) Sisi doesn't need to campaign." "Really?" "He doesn't need to campaign?" "(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)" "We need him to campaign so we can learn about him." "Normal things other nations do, ballots and candidates to consider and then vote for." "(LAUGHS)" "(APPLAUSE)" "This is a typical period that happens after a revolution." "The regime protects itself by swallowing revolutionaries and everyone ends up fucked." "MAN:" "Let's go." "Stand by." "Here we go, guys!" "BASSEM:" "We might be done forever, the end." "(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)" "Because of the, um..." "Because of the pressure of making a show like this," "I started to understand why people under the pressure of being a celebrity can actually have suicidal thoughts." "But it's not like suicide, like I'd kill myself, but sometimes you think, like..." "So since we're in a violent country right now, wouldn't, like, a shot from a gun kind of solve everything, and, you know, I'll be happy?" "It's weird, right?" "It's a little bit dark." "But yeah..." "But you know, it's just fantasies." "It's just like a fantasy of meeting Monica Bellucci." "(PEOPLE CHANTING)" "BASSEM:" "General Sisi won by 96.9%." "It was a very, very, very, very close race." "I mean, and nobody saw it coming." "And this is democracy." "And this is free elections." "Yes." "(CHEERING)" "Sisi, hero." "Sisi, hero." "Sisi, hero." "BASSEM:" "In three years' time, we went from getting rid of a military president to get a president who's even more loyal to the military." "Of course, a country controlled by the military is stable, but stability should not be the goal." "It should be something to build on." "Nothing has changed." "(IN ARABIC) It's okay." "It's really okay." "God bless you." "Thank you." "(APPLAUSE)" "(AUDIENCE CHEERING)" "Thank you, thank you, thank you." "Enough, guys!" "We begin, God willing, by thanking MBC TV for working with us." "I can't blame the channel for what's happened." "They have done everything in their power." "Sadly, the pressures were bigger than all of us." "Maybe in the future, I will be on a show." "But not right now." "The show will not be allowed to continue." "Not on MBC or any other channel." "I am tired." "Tired of fighting, tired of worrying, and fearing for the safety of myself and my loved ones." "We prefer that this show ends instead of us betraying it." "If you knew who was responsible for the cancellation, what would you say to him?" "BASSEM:" "I would ask him, why are you so scared?" "(APPLAUSE)" "(IN ENGLISH) Is political satire now dead in Egypt?" "I still believe in political satire once it is allowed to be done." "You say Al Bernameg is dead, so I'm..." "Is dead, why?" "Maybe it's asleep." "It's asleep now." "(IN ARABIC) Will you go back to medicine?" "(CHUCKLES) No." "Did Sisi cause this?" "Sorry, you only get one question." "(CHUCKLES)" "Okay, go ahead." "You have been very vague, which I'm sure is for your safety." "Please, be more specific." "You really want to get into this?" "I just want to hear..." "You want me to stand up here and yell?" "No." "I just want you to do your job." "I want to do my job, but I can't." "(APPLAUSE)" "Okay, guys, steal anything you want, the lights or anything around you." "Come here." "(IN ENGLISH) Thank you." "I'll miss you, man." "TAREK:" "Remember before the revolution, we were scared to talk about politics..." "TARIQ:" "Yeah, exactly." "...when we were taking a taxi?" "Yeah." "It was really scary back then," "because the intelligence and the national security," "they ruined a lot of people's lives." "And that all changed in the revolution." "We hoped it would change." "No, it did change." "Not for long, I guess." "We did..." "No, it did change." "Uh..." "No, Bassem happened." "Bassem happened for a while, and apparently..." "For a while." "For a while." "MIRAL:" "I'm going to miss the whole environment." "It's hard." "It's hard, yeah." "I am blessed." "I am blessed to know all these great and wonderful people, and I will miss them." "So much." "I don't think I could have done anything to change the outcome." "If I would go back in time," "I would have written the same jokes." "(IN ARABIC) The President says he won't silence anyone or tell anyone what to say." "But he wants people to be sensitive to the time we're in." "So, you're saying no one else is silenced in Egypt?" "The government's saying so, not me." "No, you personally, you don't think people in Egypt are silenced?" "Isn't Bassem Youssef a mouth that has been silenced?" "(IN ENGLISH) There was a comedian who created a program similar to our own Jon Stewart." "It was a satire." "That program was taken off the air." "That's not freedom of expression." "MALE TRANSLATOR:" "I hope you believe me." "We had nothing to do with that at all." "TAREK: (IN ARABIC) Are you proud of Bassem?" "Of course." "Remember when he left the medical field because of the show?" "It was because of you!" "Remember when you didn't trust me?" "I was so mad at you." "JON:" "For those of you who do not know who I am," "I am the Bassem Youssef of America." "Thank you." "(APPLAUSE)" "HALA:" "Of course I am not happy that the show has stopped." "But I'm relieved that I don't have to worry that much about Bassem." "Ah!" "(SQUEALS)" "(LAUGHING)" "HALA:" "I believe that stopping the show was a loss, not for Bassem, not for me, it was a loss for Egypt." "(LAUGHING)" "Everything is different." "BASSEM:" "A few hours ago Tarek called me." "He told me that I just lost the case against CBC." "I owe them 100 million pounds." "There has never been a fine this big in the history of Egyptian media." "I don't have the money to pay." "They could put me in jail." "I just put everything I can in two bags, and we're heading for the airport." "I don't know if I'm going to be stopped." "We're leaving Egypt." "My daughter may not get to grow up in our country." "I don't know if I'll ever be able to go back." "I spoke with my brother." "He told me that our dad was killed in a car accident." "I want to go back, but my brother thinks that the risk is just too high." "I can't even go back for my father's funeral." "Here's the thing." "If you are living in an atmosphere that you don't know what's going to happen tomorrow, everything is totally up for grabs." "There are so many people who are being put in jail just because they are journalists." "Or they are banned from traveling just because they tweeted something." "People will wake up, but it takes time." "The show is kind of bittersweet." "That moment of history will always remain." "This show, with all the difficulties that we went through, was a short glimpse in time where people can look back at and say," ""You know what?" "It's possible."" "ANDEEL:" "Democracy is kind of, like, lost." "It's happening slowly, but it's going to happen." "There's no way that the giant can just crush everybody." "Unless people let him do that." "Saturday Night Live!" "Who's that?" "Grandpa." "It's Grandpa." "As most of you know, my show was banned a few months ago, so I have no idea why you would listen to an unemployed bum like me." "(LAUGHTER)" "Satire was our weapon to dissect through the lies and rhetoric that were used to control the people." "They used the best-known weapon known to humans." "Fear." "Fear works." "Fear wins." "Fear is the perfect weapon." ""Hello, yes, we don't like the jokes anymore." ""Shut him down or you will be shut down." "Tata." (AUDIENCE LAUGHS)" "Sarcasm is the perfect remedy to fear." "When you laugh, you're not afraid anymore." "Those evil bastards lose." "The whole Arab Spring concept might look like it was a failure." "But maybe there is a small beacon of hope." "A revolution is not an event." "It's a process." "There is a revolution of young minds questioning everything." "All they need is a space and a path to express themselves." "Everybody can be a hero." "Everybody can be a star." "Everybody can actually get their voice heard." "We have found our voice and this time we will not give it up." "It is said, that the freedom of any people is judged by the volume of their laughter." "So my wish for you, and humanity, is to have the loudest laugh ever." "Thank you very much." "(APPLAUSE)"