"Previously on "Rescue Me"..." "How you doing?" "Hurry up and get back in the saddle, 'cause we may not be here that long." "The Mayor's closing down houses." "We got a big target on our back." "So do the West Side Wildmen, and only one of us is going to be shut down." "Franco, he was a godsend." "He fixed the car." "He fixed the stove." "Did you know that he cooks?" "Did you go by my house a couple of times while I was laid up?" "A couple of times, yeah." "I was there almost every day." "If something happens to me again, don't go by the house." "I want Damian out." "Out of what?" "The job, the calling." "There's a kid trapped down there." "All right." "I'm going." "No, no, no." "Don't go." "I don't think he should go." "He's the only one of us got a chance of squeezing through." "All right." "Good job, Dam." "This is the best goddamn job ever." "Yes." "Do you want to go to a meeting?" "I'm living in the moment." "I'm making some positive changes." "I think you're drinking too much." "This is what my old man did to me." "Made me drink and smoke until, you know, I felt like quitting." "Shawn!" "No!" "I was going to change." "Today was the day, and you know, the world is not cooperating." "So, shoot me." "Hey." "Hey." "Hey, what are you doing?" "Well, Colleen and I have come to a decision." "No more booze, no more butts." "Yeah." "I think that night that we spent down at the bar may have been very interesting for her." "May have learned something about herself." "Her legs are hollow?" "Honey, I'm serious." "I think..." "I don't know." "I think she, you know, may have gotten scared about her, you know, capacity for it." "Hmm?" "Well, I am very impressed, Tommy." "And I'm not buying a word of it." "Very impressed." "Honey, baby steps, but steps nonetheless." "I swear to God." "All right." "Serious." "You know?" "Finally, some information maybe, you know... what... whoa." "A little early for that, isn't it?" "What?" "Wine." "It's 8:00 in the morning." "What, you're not tossing these?" "No." "I'm tossing booze, not wine." " Wine is booze." " Honey, no." "Booze is booze." "Oh." "Ok." "Now, is is going to sound really silly, but define booze for me, OK?" "The difference between wine and booze." "Ok." "Honey, booze is booze." "Booze is, you know, whiskey and vodka and, you know, spirits." " You know?" " And wine?" "Wine is in a whole separate family, honey." "Wine is like you know... it's a delicacy." "Wine is like, uh, it's grape juice with a little extra kick." "It's when... you know, they talk about fine wines, you know?" "It's like France." "They drink wine in France all day." "I mean, they don't drink at 8:00 in the morning, but" "They start around lunchtime, you know." "They take it pretty serious." "And which explains why France is the superpower it is today." "Ok." "Yeah." "Italy..." "I mean, I could name a million countries." "Ok." "Do you see how desperate you are?" " I'm not desperate." "I'm..." " Hey, you're trying to use Italy... to win an argument." " Honey..." " Ok?" "Forget the French." "Forget the Italians." "You are 100% Mick through and through, and that little kick that wine has, you're going to keep drinking it until it kicks you like a goddamn mule." "Oh." "Ok." "I..." "I know what this is." "I know." "I know what you're doing." "Yeah." "This is... you know what this?" "It's racist." " That's what this is." "This is..." " Oh, come on." "No, it's the stereotypical, you know, Irish cliche." "All we're good for is drinking, right?" "And fighting." "Racism." "And making bad food." "Racism." "Hey, Tommy, it's in your blood." "It's in her blood." "You... you have any idea how much wine it would take for me and and Colleen to get even remotely shit-faced, OK?" "No." "I have absolutely no idea, but I'm certain the two of you will find out very, very soon." "Hey." "This can work." "Ugh." "For the two of you, I doubt it." "For the entire Napa Valley?" "It's a goddamn gold rush and do me a favor and keep count." "We will." "So, uh, what's better with cheerios, white or red?" "Funny." "♪ on another day, c'mon, c'mon, with these ropes I tied, can we do no wrong, now we grieve 'cause now is gone things were good when we were young, with my teeth locked down," "I can see the blood of a thousand men who have come and gone, now we grieve 'cause now is gone, things were good when we were young, is it safe to say?" "C'mon, c'mon, was it right to leave?" "C'mon, c'mon, will I ever learn?" "C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon ♪" "62 truck." "Hey, what's going on?" "Yo!" "What's crackin', my man?" " Hey, listen." "I'm on my way in, and..." " Oh, that's right." "First day back to school for you." "You excited?" "You get a new lunch box?" "Yeah." "That's really funny." "Listen, the guys, are they planning, like, some kind of bullshit, you know, celebratory surprise thing for me?" "And I know you're probably surrounded by the guys," " so just give me a yes or no answer on it." " No." "Ok, which means yes." "Tell the guys take the banner and the bundt thing down, you know." "They can start eating the cake." "Send the strippers home." "I don't want to make a big thing out of this." "Actually, tell them... tell them they can keep the strippers around, but otherwise you know, business as usual, OK?" "I don't know, dude." "The guys are pretty excited." "Well, I don't want to be a dick about it, but..." "Well, old habits die hard." " What?" " Nothing." "Ok." "You broke up on me there for a second." "Listen, it's just..." "Tell them it's a regular day." "All right." "I'll break the bad news to the guys." "All right." "Talk to you when I get there." "Who was that, probie?" "Nobody special." " Yes, dudes!" "Got one." " Finally." "Yeah, congratulations, asshole." "Only took you 3 1/2 hours." "It would help if it actually fit in the jigsaw puzzle," " you douche." "You can't just squeeze it in." " What's wrong with you?" "Hey." "What's going on?" "Nothing much, man." "Where is everybody?" "I don't know." "Ok." "That was like a queef." "Hey." "Hey, what's up, T?" "Hey, what's up?" "Come on, do it." "What the hell are you doing in?" "This is the day you told me I could come back to work, right?" "Was that today?" "Marlon Brando you're not, OK?" " Nice try." " Ok." "Guys." "Ahem." "Hey." " Go ahead..." " So, where are they?" " Who?" " What are you talking about?" "Really?" "Strippers." "Where are they?" "In the other room?" "Yeah, they're in the other room." "Lou, will you give us a little bit of a template for the... the proper..." "Oh!" "That's an opening act." "He's checking the back room." "All right." "Go, go, go." " Ow!" "Aw." " You all right?" " All right." " Hey, guys." "Ok." "I get it." "Where are they?" "In the bunk room?" "The truck?" "You got 'em in the truck?" "The hell are you talking about?" "Hey, the jig is up, assholes." "All right?" "Before they get cold or tired and leave." "Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't you tell me that you didn't want us making a big deal out of you coming back?" "Let me get this straight." "I snuck out of the hospital, and" "I did my own rehab to get myself back into this room and ready to go back to work with you guys, and you have... what?" "You're telling me there's no cake, no, uh... no girls, no hats, nothing?" "Yes." "Lou is the winner!" "Come on." "Pay up, pay up." "You guys aren't going to even lift a finger to welcome me back." "Ok." " We missed you." " Tommy's back." "I'm laughing so hard." "Consider yourself fortunate it wasn't a different finger." "Yeah." "I got a finger for you." "Step on it, Niels." "This call box is smack dead between us and the West Side Wildmen." "Whoever gets first on the scene scores big points with HQ and and the natives." "Hold onto your nuts." "Well, normally I prefer a warm bath and a glass of red wine, but I'll makedo." "Well, well, well." "If it isn't girls gone wild." "Homos on wheels." "Holy shit." "Is that Tommy Gavin?" " That's right." " Back to work already." "Hardly recognize you without the bull's-eye on your forehead." "I'm rubber, you're glue, pal." "Nice comeback, huh?" "I'm bleeding." "So, how's it feel to play second fiddle to the best house in Harlem?" "Second fiddle my ass." "We were here first." "I don't think so, pendejo." "Hey, hey." "Knock it off." "This ain't "West Side Story."" "So what, Kurt Cobain pulled the box?" "All right." "Here's what's going to happen." "We're all going to do our jobs and see how this plays out." "The old heroin hang, huh?" " You cop a rotten bag?" "Phew!" " Grab the medical bag." "He might be in OD." "We were here first." "This is our call." "Arrived first, my dimpled ass." "Black Shawn, go get the med kit." "Tommy, phone in the bus, will you?" " Got it." " This is our call." "Hey, it's our call." "Who asked you?" "Who asked you, asshole?" "Who you calling asshole, asshole?" "I'm calling you an asshole." "And you an asshole." "You're all" "You're all assholes, as a matter of fact." " Except you, of course." " God." "You're amazing." "What's your name?" " Eat shit, asshole." " Ok." "Feisty." "I like it." "Look, why don't you guys just back off, huh, Bob?" " You back off." "He's ours." " No, he's ours." "Hey!" "Whoa, you're right." "He's yours." "Oh, no." "Bullshit." "You got here first." " You want it." "You called it." "You got it." " Doesn't matter." "Doesn't matter." " Yes, it does matter." " No, it does not, either." "What is this, third grade?" "Penny, get the O2 kit and some ice packs off the rig." "Damian, open his pants." "Wait, you want me to blow him back to life?" " Yeah." " Just open his pants, probie." "All right." "Get in there." "Now, take one of those ice packs and shove it under his nut sack." "What?" "This ain't how I get my kicks, sweetheart." "Just do it." "Here, I'll do it." "No, I'll do it." "You know, I'm pretty sure he shit his pants." "Yeah." "You do it." " Attaboy." " Oh." " Yeah." "Yeah." " There you go." "See?" "And they say chivalry's dead." "You want me to grab a saws-all so you can cut that hand off later?" "Yeah." "Bus is on its way, lieutenant." " Good." " All right." "Put another bag under his nuts, OK?" "Go on." "Get back in there." "I better get a phone number out of this." "His or mine?" " Ooh!" " Oh!" "Ugh!" "Whoa, whoa!" "Whoa!" "Get your hand out!" "I can't!" "It's stuck!" "Rape!" "Rape!" "Jesus Christ!" "Ok?" "What the hell is this?" "You ODed, and we saved your life, that's what this is." "You wrecked my high is what you did, man." "Ok." "He's going to live to shoot up another day." "Gentlemen, this is a draw." "Everyone, please return to neutral corners." "Yeah." "We'll settle this at cook-off." " Yeah, right." " You assholes don't stand a chance." "Yeah, whatever." "Whatever?" "You look at these dickheads?" "Idiots, dude." "Morons." "Like looking in a mirror, huh?" "You know what?" "No one's talking to you, black Shawn." "Why don't you keep walking?" "Yeah, dude." "Why don't you go dribble a basketball or something?" "Ha." "It's the only reason he was brought into our house in the first place, right?" "Look at me now, running circles around you clowns." "But don't get sensitive, ladies." "Every village has an idiot." "We're just blessed to have dos..." "You, you." "You know what?" "I'm so sick of that shit, man." "I went to college, briefly." "That's right." "I got some college in me." "Yeah, man." "I got a bachelor's degree." " Do you really?" " Yeah, I got it online but, you know, it still counts, right?" "Not to mention I am a bachelor, dude." "Yeah." "You know what?" "It does count." "Between the two of us, we practically got, like, a master's degree." "Yeah." "You know what?" "We're a lot smarter than people are giving us credit for around here." "Yeah." "You're right." "You know what?" "We're going to do something about it." "You and me, we're going to team up, and we're going to prove to these assholes that we're not just, like, punching bags." " Yeah." "How?" " I don't know." "Let me think." " Uh..." " Cramp?" "Huh?" "Oh, I got an idea." "New Orleans." "Dude." "Mardi Gras, bro." "I like it." "Hello." "It's not for the greater good." "Dude, a couple of days down in Mardi Gras would be great, bro, and it sure would do me a shitload of good, you know?" " I'm talking about, like, helping people." " Like who?" "Like, uh, the victims of hurricane what's-her-face, Katrina?" "Dude, that was, like, 10 years ago." "Bro, it was 3 years ago, OK?" "A lot of those people don't even have places to live." "So." "Well, I saw on TV, actually, where Brad Pitt's building a bunch of houses for the people down there." " Really?" " Yeah." "Brad Pitt's a carpenter?" "No." "He's an architect." "Not, like, pro, but, like, semi-pro." "And his wife's a senator, by the way." "No, she's an ambassador." "Come on." "I got it." "Brad Pitt's got New Orleans covered, right?" "So, starving children in Africa." "George Clooney's taking care of them." "What?" "Since when?" "Yeah." "Since he won the Oscar, dude." "He's saving, like, all the starving kids, and then, he sells them to Angelina Jolie, who flies them over here and feeds them, bro." "When did she become a pilot?" "Uh, right after she became an ambassador, I guess." "All right." "I got it." "Water." "Clean water." "We work with water." "It ties right in." "Matt Damon's got the whole water thing taken care of." "Water.org, dude." "What's Ben Affleck doing?" "Directing." "God." "Selfish." "Selfish prick." "All right." "It's back to the old drawing board." "Hey, you know, we have crayons and construction paper back at the house for you boys." "Nice." "I haven't used crayons and construction paper since I was, like, 10." "Etch-a-sketch." "Hey, Tommy boy." "How's the wing, huh?" "Good." " Yeah?" " Feeling great." "Yeah." "Cool." "Really getting some movement back in it..." "Great." "Hey, Jan. What's going on?" "What?" "No, no, no." "Actually, I don't think those pants are too dressy at all but what top are you going to wear?" "Really?" "What's the occasion?" "Oh, yeah?" "No." "You know, actually, I think you're good with that combo." "But the shoes are key." "You should go, like, you know, toeless or open toe or whatever." "All right." "Yeah." "Yeah, he's right here." "Hold on." "Wifey." "Hey, what's up?" "Hello?" "Honey?" "Honey?" "Shit." "Hon?" "Does Tommy seem a little off to you, chief?" "Nah, he's all right." "I don't know." "The way that guy was tag smack before, and Tommy just stood there taking it?" "Maybe you brought him back a little too soon." "Tommy's fine, OK?" "Just needs to find his sea legs." "It's Lou I'm worried about." "See the gock?" "Nah, I think that's a Danish, chief." "No, asshole, the gock." "When a man loses his waistline and his gut runs straight down to his cock, that's called the gock." "On a woman, it's called the gunt." "No, you know what?" "The technical term is fupa." "Fat upper pubic area." " We're going with gock." " Gock it is." " Here you go." " Thanks." "Hey, how about a soup kitchen?" "Soup kitchen?" "For what?" " Hey, what did she say?" " Who?" " Hey, none of your business." "Really, don't worry about it." " Janet." "Well, if it's none of our business, why are you talking about it in front of us, genius?" "Why are you listening to our conversation?" "Why don't you just keep talking to Tommy?" "Well, I will keep talking to Tommy, but now, my curiosity is piqued because you're being so defensive about it." "I mean, what's the deal?" "You want to do something for charity?" "You hungry for something you don't have to chew?" "We're trying to do some good for the community, Frank, you know?" "That could be just as easily achieved as you two shitheads hopping on a bus to Toledo." "Yeah." "Hey, hey, hey!" "Easy, easy!" "Shawn, stand down!" "Stand down!" "Hey, kids, enough already!" "I will turn this truck around." "Do it." "All right." "All right." "Fine." "Now we're not stopping for ice cream." " Get him." "Get him." "Mike, Mike, get him." " Jesus Christ." "Shit." "What, Lou?" "We're not stopping for ice cream." "All right, fellas." "Let's get a little food order going here." "What do you feel like eating?" " Uh, Italian." " American." " Mexican." " French-Thai fusion." " Crepes." " Chinese it is." "French-Thai fusion?" "Hey." "What are you guys doing?" "Hey." "We brought you a little something." "What's this?" "That, my dear nephew, is a rare bottle of Irish whiskey." "A little something to wish you well on your first day back." "Wow." "This is really top shelf stuff." "Top shelf?" "They keep that shit in the safe." "That there is a distilled work of art, my friend." "Hell, I wish I could have a taste of that myself." "Well, I hate to tell you, boys, but I ain't drinking whisky no more." "Yep." "Strictly a wine man now." "Oh, the wine." "Changing seats on the "Titanic," he is." "Well, you can do whatever you want, Tom." "We just came down to wish you well on the job and in life." "Really?" "What gives?" "We've come to the conclusion..." "That you're a lost cause, and now, we got to cut you loose." "Uh-huh, what's going on?" "I'm sorry, Tommy." "What comes next ain't going to be pretty." "I love you, but I'm out of bullets, both literally and figuratively." "Going to miss you." "Stay low." "In vino veritas." "Yeah, well, screw you, too." "What do you think of that?" "Engine." "Ladder." "Oh, please let this be a false alarm for a change." "It's, what, like, the eighth call in a row?" "Yeah, not to mention those 3 wave-offs, right, though?" "I haven't even seen the house since breakfast." "Shit, man." "My legs are stiff as boards." "Oh, that must make it tough to run circles around people." " Not you, bitch." " Oh, bitch?" "Yeah." "I mean, the fire, the two water main breaks, and the gas leak," "I can understand." "But three ODs, 5 sick calls, a guy with a beer bottle stuck up his ass and that chick with the busted tit implant?" "Not what I signed up for." "I'm not complaining about that last one, though." "Yeah, 'cause you felt her up for three minutes." "Yeah, well, asshole, it was my job to feel her up." "Oh, was it also your duty to put your hand on her ass?" "Nothing wrong with being thorough." "Amen to that." "Hey, Tommy, you OK?" "Yeah." "Golden." "You know, I was in that hospital bed for about 4 weeks dreaming of a day like this." "You guys are bitching and whining and moaning about being busy." "Why don't you put in for a transfer to some house in Staten Island where you can sit around with your dick in your hand?" "You know, you want to twitter and twatter and download deaf mute porn online, why don't you run for congress?" "Me, I'm happy being a firefighter again." "All right." "What happened here?" "This young lady and her boyfriend were walking down the street ahead of me." "The boy, he dropped down the grate there like a sack of potatoes." " Yeah." "That's got to be 20, 30 feet, Tommy." " At least." "Ahh." "Hey." "Where's Lou?" "I don't know where he is, Tom." " All right." "Who's going down?" " I'll do it." "No, no." "No." "You can take care of the crowd..." " Why?" "I can do it." "I..." " Are we having a conversation?" "Niels, watch the crowd." "Swing the ladder around." "Franco, get a bucket and a board." "Two Shawns, harness up." "Hey, you all right?" "Can you hear me, kid?" "All right, boys." "Here you go." "Watch your leg." "Keep an eye on that girl at the corner, all right?" "Why don't you get your balls off my leg?" "Dude, why don't you get your dirty black balls off of me, man?" "Shit?" "My balls are not dirty." "They're black, but they're not dirty." "Ok?" " Ahh." " Yeah, go ahead." "Watch the basket." " Get off of me, man." " You get off of me!" "Hey, can't we all just get along?" " Uh, we got him, Tom." " Yeah?" "You got him on the board?" " Yeah, doing it now." " All right." "Nice." "All right." "Ok, guys." "Easy." "Easy, guys." "Nice." "Very nice." " He up?" " Yep." " He's up." " All right." "Get us out of here." "Shawn's molesting the hell out of me down here." "You're molesting me." "Stop touching me." "You touched me first, man come on." " I don't want you touching me like that..." " Nice job, guys." " My thigh, man." " Really?" "Get your thigh off me like that." "Tommy, get us out of here!" "Come on." "You know what?" "We're leaving them down there." " Later, assholes." " Hey, hey!" "Hello!" "Hey, yo!" "Hello?" "Hey." "What are you doing?" "Oh, we ain't getting any younger, my friend." "You all right?" "Yeah." "I think I pulled something hopping off the rig." "What's your excuse?" "I was doing your job." "Delegating." "Besides, I think it's good for the guys, you know." "It's good experience." "You know, this Irish pride is going to put both of us in our own grave, don't you?" "You're going to have to realize, Tommy, you can't keep going at it like you're 25 for the rest of your life." "Sooner or later, the machine, it starts to break down." "It already has." "Let me tell you something, OK?" "This shoulder?" "Couple of weeks from now, tip-top." "Tippy-top." "You know." "Shippity-shape." "You can't even finish your sentences anymore, Tom." "There's no shame in being on the other side of the peak, Tom." "All right." "I know what this is." "You're using this as an excuse to give me your annual "why don't you become a lieutenant, take the exam" speech." "Tom, you really want to be the guy 10 years from now holding onto your glory days like you're some schmuck in the back row of a Springsteen concert?" "Come on." "Who's a schmuck?" "I'm not a schmuck.." "You want to be the guy that the young guys are talking about, looking at you, saying, "Hey, that's Tommy Gavin over there, man"" "He used to be the shit." "Now look at him"?" "I think you're afraid of failing the test." "Yeah." "Yeah." "I'm afraid..." "I'm actually afraid of passing the test and end up like you..." "40 pounds overweight and... and bleeding out from my papercutsk from doing all the paperwork." " You... what?" " This isn't about me." "Now, you know what?" "You should look in the mirror." "You ever take a look in the mirror?" "We all have our crosses to bear, Tom, all right?" "Bulimics puke." "Pill heads pop pills." "Junkies shoot junk." "Drunks drink." "I eat." "Now, if you'll excuse me, you're making me kind of hungry." "And last month, would have been you going down into that hole." "Nice job." "Good job, fellas." "You guys are make a good pair." " Thanks, man." " Like Amos and Asshole." "Which one of us is asshole?" "Here's a hint..." "Amos was black." "Never should have asked." "I'm sorry for calling you and Mike stupid before." "Oh, hey, man." "You know, I'm just on edge, you know." "My girl is drinking, and it's that Gavin thing." "You know?" "It's a mess." "Tell me about it." "I was married to her aunt for a while." "I forgot you guys were hitched." "Yeah." "I wish I could forget." "You know what?" "All I can tell you is, you know, stick in it as long as you can, fight the good fight, and, you know, at the end of the day, if it's bad, that inner ref inside you?" "Put a stop to it." "If not, I'll be there to help you out." " Thanks, Sean." " Hey, you got it." "Yo, I got an idea for that good deeds thing, if you want to hear about it." "Yeah, man." "Hit me." "Ok, listen." "You got cancer from working down at ground zero, right?" " Yes." " And we had to foot the bill" " because Uncle Sam ain't signing any checks, right?" "Right." "A lot of other brothers on the job are dealing with the same thing, so you could do something like speak up on it, bring some attention to the situation." "I don't get it." "No, I get it." "No, I get it." "I do get it." "That's a great idea." "God, why didn't we think of that?" "Mike is such an idiot." "You said it, not me." "Hey, thanks, pal." "Hey." "Hi." "What's up?" "Well, I'm just calling to let you know that it is officially 17 past 6:00 in the evening, and Colleen has already poured her third goblet of wine, and she is still sober." "Honey, I told you this was a great idea." "And now, she's pouring goblet number 4." "Uh-huh." "Is Franco there?" "Franco?" "Huh?" "Uh, Janet just wants to say hey." "Oh, cool." "Hey, Jan-Jan." "What's going on?" "Oh, yeah." "I know." "No, no, no." "No." "There's still some in the house for sure." "Did you check the medicine cabinet?" "Ok." "What about the cupboard?" "Really?" "That's weird." "Oh!" "You know what?" "I know where it is." "It's on the... you know that bookshelf next to the dining room table?" "Yeah." "Either that, or in that little drawer next to the bed." "Yeah." "Yeah, I know." "I know." "You are so silly." "All right." "I'll talk to you later." "Bye, Jan-Jan." "Hmm." "Hey." "Hello?" "Hmm." "Disconnected." "What were you guys laughing about?" "Huh?" "Oh, nothing." "Inside joke." "Oh." "Yeah." "Huh." "What was it..." "Oh, about Vaseline." "Ooh." "For the kid." "Baby's got a rash." "So silly." "Yeah." "Yeah." "You know I get those rashes." "Yeah." "You go got stuff to..." "Yeah." " You all right?" " Yeah." "Jan-Jan." "Mmm." "Hey, you got a rash, Tom?" "Because, um, sometimes, like, a little baby powder down there works great for the old bunker balls." "Get away from me." " Get in the car." " What are you doing?" " Get in the car." " I'm not getting in the car." "Get in the car or I'll put those naked photos I took of you up on my Facebook page." "What naked photos?" "I'm..." "I'm get..." "I'm getting..." "Right." "How is it going?" "It's going good." "It's busy." "It's just, you know... it's good for me just to getting right back, you know?" "I mean, my arm's sore, but you know, it's weird." "It's like, if I..." "Ahh." "If I go, like, straight up like this with this shoulder, right there, that's what hurts me." "It really kind of hurts." "You don't really want to know about..." "Ahh." "You want to talk about Damian." " Mm-hmm." " Ahem." " Yes, I do." " Ok." " Well... he's not texting me back." "He's not calling me." "He's not even coming for laundry night anymore." "And I need to know, you know, what the deal is." "Everything's cool." "What was that?" "Hmm." "What?" "Unlock the door, Sheila." "I will unlock the door when you start talking." "I'm a grown man, I can't get out... come on." "Yeah, grown man." "Childproof locks." "I don't have any fingernails." "You're not going to like what I have to say." "He kind of, sort of, uh, pretty much did solo save." "Oh, God." " And..." " Oh, my God." "The department's going to give him a, you know, thing." " A what?" "What?" " A medal." "Ohh!" "Listen, he's going to be a hero." "What the Frick is he doing being a hero?" "He's supposed to get out of the dumb job, not get medals for it." "Ok." "What do you want?" "You know, the kid's got a knack for it." "There was a kid who was, you know, trapped under a collapsed building." "What do you mean, there was a kid..." "you let him go into a collapsed building?" "No." "Yes." "Wait!" "The building didn't really completely collapse until after he pulled the kid out..." " Oh!" " Where is your... where is it?" "Ow!" "Ow!" "Ow!" "God damn it!" "What do you want me to do, reorder the kid's goddamn DNA?" "You know, he... most people would be ecstatic about this." "They'd be full of pride and happy." "You're right." "I am?" "Yes, you are totally right." "'Cause you know what, at least he only got the hero Gavin gene instead of the raging, alcoholic, sex fiend, angry, asshole gene." " I'm referring to you." " I know who you're referring to." "I'm a little fed up with this blame me, I'm always the guilty one, me me me me." "What about you?" " What about..." " What?" "What about me?" "Ha ha!" "Ha ha, go ahead, what?" "Find something." "Ok." "You want something, I'll give you so..." "Yeah, go ahead, go ahead." "The mothering thing, OK?" "You're smothering him with the moth... you're a smothers mother, that's what you are." "You know what I mean?" "It's like a pillow... a love pillow that you're holding over the kid." "He can't breathe." "I'm telling you." "You gotta..." "You're too emotional, and you care, and you're too loving." "You need to, like, you know, like, be more..." "What, be more like your mother?" "5 packs a day and colder than a kitchen..." "Hey, she had a house full of kids, OK?" "And she was doing it with no money and she was married to a guy who was a firefighter, was a raging alcoholic and would never admit it, and had 3 girlfriends on the side." "All he thought about was drinking and sex and himself." "Shut up." " You're doing a great job." " Thank you." "You're welcome." " Hey, what's going on?" " Hey." " Hey." " What are you doing here, ma?" " Whose car is this?" " This is a loaner 'cause mine's in the shop." "Honey, you look so tired." "How about you answer my first question?" "Which was what?" "What are you doing here?" "I..." "I'm here to talk to Tommy about something that is" " totally unrelated to you." " Oh, yeah?" "What?" "Kitchen... appliances." " Stoves." "Talking about stoves." " Tommy, get out of the car." "I can't." "Christ!" "Go." "Thanks." "Hey." "Hey, stay close." "This won't take long." "All right." "Everything all right?" "For me?" "Yeah." "Ahh." "Ahem." "What?" "What?" "Nothing." "We're good." "We are?" "Yeah." "We are very good, thank you." "What's going on?" " Did I miss something, or..." " Hmm?" "No, no, no." "You didn't miss anything." "I just..." "I just realized that, you know, you've tried your hardest and you have been the best uncle you could be, and the best friend that you could be, and I honestly, I thank you for that." "And you are released." "I, um, released from what?" "Ahh!" "Ha ha!" "Whoo!" " Hiya, Sheila." " Hey!" "Tommy, tea time's over." "Come on, let's go." " Tea time's over." " Ok." " Do you want me to drive you to the fire?" " No." "Tommy, shit's burning!" " I am going, I'm going." " Let's move." "Good talk!" "Ah." " Thanks." " Take your pack." "What do we got, Lou?" "There's still two inside, one male, one female." "Any word on the source?" "Well, Tommy's alibi is solid." "He was getting a lecture from my mother." "Hey, funny girl, game face." "Lou, Tommy, Franco, black Shawn, you go inside, look for stragglers." "You take spicy and go around the back." " Get my tools." " Sure, man." " Ah, God damn it." " You OK?" "Ah, yeah, I'm OK." "We're going into a burning church and you're asking me if I'm OK?" "All right, go." "Ahh." "Fire department, anybody here?" "Hello?" "Fire department!" "Oh, you guys, take upstairs." "All right, Lou." "FDNY, fire department, anybody here?" "Hey, check the closet." "I'm going to check over here." "Ow!" "I found her!" "Lou!" "We got a 1045, female." " Rest of the floor is clear." " Alright, bring her down." "Ah!" "All right, sir, hold on, we're coming to get you." " Where are you?" " Oh, jeez!" "Sir, you gotta get out of here!" "No, please!" "This is my parish!" "She's in there!" "We gotta get you out of here!" "Come on!" "I got it, I got it." "I got it." "The fire out?" "Go away." " Hey, where's Tommy?" " He's coming out." "Did he get the grab?" " Yes, he did." " Yes, he did." "Got it." "Hey." "Where's the girl?" " You're lookin' at her." " This?" "God bless you." "You saved Mary." "God bless you." "There you go." "You got her?" "This statue is worth a fortune." "Our parish had it shipped over at the turn of the century from the Vatican, where it stood for 575 years." "Oh, Mary." "Oh, God, oh, God, what happened back here?" " What?" " Look here." " Where?" " Right here." "Where... where?" "There's a hole in it." "No, I think that's where she's, like, attached to the wall, you know?" "Mary has never been attached." "I know every inch of her." "That looks like a hole that was meant to... you know," " I don't..." "I didn't..." " No." " No?" " No." "This is not how I left her." "That's how I found her." " I mean, it was..." " Well, this is not how I left her." "Hey, there was a couple corners down there, and there was a staircase maybe..." "What am I saying?" "You know?" "You sent me into a room full of smoke and flame to pull out a chunk of plastic." "Hey, Gavin, nice, nice grab, man." "I hope you copped a good feel on the way out." "Oh!" "That's the blessed virgin mother, asshole!" "All right, Tommy, come on!" "Unbelievable." "Sorry about that, father." " I guess I lost my..." " No, don't be sorry." "I'm only pissed that you beat me to the punch." " Thank you." " You're welcome." "Is it real?" " Stop playing." " Who cares?" "I called Bobby and had him put an order in." " Wow." " Dig in, fellas." " Oh, pepperoni!" " No, no, no, go get Lou." "Go get Lou." "That was a tour for the ages, gentlemen." "35 calls in one shift is no easy feat." "I'm proud of you." " What?" " What's with the bag?" "All right, we're not waiting." "This is for you, Gavin." " Is this from Uncle Teddy?" " Open it up." "No, this is from us." "It's a welcome back gift." " Ahh." "I swear to God..." " Oh, everything's fine." "Boom!" "What?" "Bet you don't have one of these." "This is so everybody knows where you live." "And this is where HQ is going to aim when they come after us." " Is this kevlar?" " Kevlar." "Hey, hey, something's wrong with Lou." "Well, let me guess, he lost his appetite." "Lou lost his appetite?" "There's something wrong with the universe." " Over here, see?" " What's wrong with Lou?" " Oh, Jesus." " What?"