"Be honest." "You miss him." "Every day." "And so you came up with this..." "Idea." "The frozen man." "He doesn't age." "He doesn't change." "You don't like change." "I'm okay with change." "Hon. Please." "You told me about your house. his clothes in the closet." "Can't I miss my husband?" "don't bullshit me." "You've been in my seat." "If I were sitting here right now telling you but I keep this fantasy alive that he isn't dead." "He's actually frozen in some kind of..." "Cryogenic chamber." "He's coming back." "right?" "How you're the one who's frozen?" "Tell me about your mother." "She died loading the dishwasher." "a Thursday." "I was five." "We were in the yellow house on potsdamer platz." "This was when pops was stationed in Germany." "I'm in half pants and a dinosaur shirt playing with silly putty on the floor." "Remember how you could press it into the funnies in the newspaper and make a copy?" "etcetera." "9:15 in the morning." "It was raining." "Then it stopped and the sun came out." "And I'm pressing the silly putty into this paper on the floor." "a chevron pattern." "And the kitchen is warm from the steam when you open the dishwasher. and took out the cutlery basket." "Did you know they called it that?" "A cutlery basket?" "No. singing along with the radio." "99 luftballons." "She had a nice voice." "You spend a lot of time in this memory." "In the past." "I like to think I'm a time traveler." "back." "But all I can do is..." "Watch. this attachment between you." "Oh... but we're really..." "The same person." "Yeah." "Both:" "Basically." "The way we move and how we..." "Finish each other's sentences almost." "I know sharing a body." "That'd be..." "We're not crazy." "We just really..." "Really like being together." "um..." "What's it-- who's it hurting?" "That's my..." "That's what I wanna know." "I'm sensing a lot of hostility." "Didn't you tell me..." "How you were the last boy in your class to mature?" "Your voice dropping." "The hair coming in down there." "It's not a race." "What a boy goes through." "His physical and emotional growth." "What matters is where you end up." "Do I seem like less than a man to you now?" "I'm just trying to help you see the truth." "This constant anger. but it's not the world isolating you." "It's you." "I know you're just..." "Trying to help." "feel real." "Talk about that." "I don't know." "There's a-- something's wrong." "you know?" "But not an interesting one." "More like the one where you're folding laundry." "Or eating." "but somehow you know." "Okay." "Well. so let's pick this up tomorrow." "Okay?" "nurse's station." "This is warning number one." "and 14 you have." "It's your serve." "Spot check." "Arms out." "Do we" "I just-- you know I can't stand to be touched." "There's a note in" "right?" "Human spit?" "Maybe he ate yogurt." "Like a creamy..." "What's he on?" "Klonopin?" "klonopin'll..." "Or-- hold the phone." "Yogurt and klonopin." "That'll..." "A cocktail." "Do you ever wonder what he was like before this place?" "did he have a bank account or a girlfriend?" "Maybe he loved dogs." "Everybody loves dogs." "Not me." "who was he before..." "This?" "Who were you?" "Who was I?" "There is no before." "Not once the sickness starts." "the cruelest joke. we could all go back to..." "What?" "Loving dogs?" "20 bucks it breaks before it hits the floor." "It never breaks." "Never say never." "Hi." "There's pie at lunch." "I got an inside track." "and pie." "Cherry." "Paul knows this guy in the cafeteria." "That's..." "I know you love that." "did you guys notice there's a different door in the south hall?" "Different how?" "like from a-- hey." "It's time for your session." "So how are you feeling?" "you know." "I've been..." "Much clearer actually." "I really feel like I've found myself here." "A rhythm." "A sense of peace." "painting." "how close we've gotten." "The world is starting to make sense." "Good." "And these issues you used to raise... of difference from the rest of the world?" "you know?" "and that..." "I don't know." "I just feel in control here." "my expectations. i have so much more than-- do you ever worry you'll lose it?" "I-i used to." "All the time... clarity... a symptom of the other side of the disease kicking in." "You're talking about mania." "Yes. that invulnerable feeling that's..." "That's dangerous." "you know?" "Now that I have balance." "Stop." "No pie for you." "What?" "Why?" "Here." "Take mine." "No." "Eat." "No." "Not if you can't have any." "Go ahead." "It's just pie." "There's bugs!" "Bugs!" "Bugs!" "You okay?" "boo." "Jesus." "Are you allowed to be in here?" "Don't be a baby." "Move up." "What?" "Nothing." "I just..." "You ever have that feeling..." "Like something's happened before?" "Except differently." "So... but different." "Are you happy..." "Here?" "Look at us." "Why wouldn't I be happy?" "I know." "get out?" "I'm no good at "out there." "it's too loud." "It's life." "What life is. so..." "I'm not saying-- but come on." "You can't stay here forever popping pills five times a day." "I'm down to twice a day." "maybe..." "Who knows?" "Maybe they'd give us our own room." "We could be together." "just--just living day by day." "Until what?" "Osteoporosis?" "You really want to grow old in a mental hospital?" "surrounded by..." "What?" "The other freaks?" "Maybe we should." "Maybe we belong here." "she says the grind of it." "And me with my sensitivity... the grounding." "I-I'm good." "I can't stay here." "Not even for me?" "Cary:" "Abilify." "Kerry:" "Brintellix." "Cary:" "Chlorpromazine." "Duloxetine." "Escitalopram." "Melanie:" "Such a beautiful day." "Flupentixol." "Kerry:" "That's an injectable." "Have you ever seen a sky so blue?" "It can also be a tablet." "Mmm..." "I'll allow it." "Geodon." "We're exercising our minds." "I see that." "Sorry." "I didn't sleep well." "Cary:" "Is it the dream again?" "I'm in a room that's not a room..." "Full of people I can't see." "like we're already dead." "We just don't know it." "Clozapine." "Or Effexor in large doses." "Yeah. a lemonade." "frosty..." "Mine was..." "Wait." "000 leagues under the sea"?" "Melanie?" "What?" "What do you dream about?" "Love." "Have you guys noticed a door in the hall?" "It's not always there." "Kerry:" "So where is it?" "I mean." "Syd:" "Exactly." "What?" "How can a door be there and not be there at the same time?" "perhaps." "Or physical displacement rooted in four-dimensional geometry. confusing one hallway with another." "I'm not making it up." "no one said "making up. as in the interchangeability of the hallways and how one memory could be confused with another memory." "No." "This is something else." "Torrent downloaded from RARBG" "hold that thought." "I have to go to the..." "Little boy's room." "Uncle!" "uncle!" "It's me." "Sorry." "That's quite a grip you've got there." "okay?" "just knock on the wall." "Affirmative." "Namaste." "Hello." "Hello." "Guttentag?" "Buenos tardes." "Konnichi wa?" "I'm..." "Is this..." "Am I dreaming?" "uh... like a huge..." "Can you take me there?" "Oh." "maybe..." "Maybe what? and how it's there sometimes and not other times. like someone wanted to get out." "Except nobody else... you know I've had that feeling for weeks of how sometimes this place just doesn't seem real." "And in this book I'm reading maybe it's a version of reality." "And not reality itself." "Syd:" "What?" "Just be careful." "What do you mean?" "Nothing." "It's-- with your diagnosis I would hate them to find out and up your meds." "What do you mean?" "What do imaginary doors have to do with not wanting to be touched?" "What do you mean touched?" "my thing." "How I don't like to be touched." "How it hurts me." "um..." "That's not-- right?" "Seeing things that aren't real." "No." "That's you." "I'm manic depression." "happy." "Just more so." "Remember? the frantic alphabetizing and then I tied a knot." "What are you talking about?" "You're schizophrenic." "I have an antisocial personality disorder." "Schizo?" "I'm not..." "I don't have crazy thoughts." "You're the" "I just don't wanna-- why are you saying that?" "You're right--I'm-- i must have gotten" "I'm sorry." "much better." "And I shouldn't have-- it's like-- busker said it's like how I just wanna make sure that you're not-- it feels good." "I feel more positive." "I'm not psychotic." "please." "You are so much better than when you first-- they had you in straps." "Remember?" "Raving and violent." "just... okay?" "It's just a hospital." "All the doors are hospital doors." "I'm..." "I gotta go." "Syd." "Syd!" "Wait!" "Syd!" "I..." "Killed your friend..." "David:" "Wanna be my girlfriend?" "gorgeous!" "David:" "I'm the magic man." " Sydney?" " Hey." "What are you doing out here?" "It's after hours." "I'm sorry." "I was just on my way back from the bathroom." "Do you like music?" "Music?" "I've had a lot of luck lately with music therapies." "Patients find it very calming." "but I was just--it's bedtime and all that." "It's okay." "Go ahead." "Go ahead." "Put 'em on." "It's beautiful." "What is it?" "Crickets." "Crickets?" "Lenny:" "Just listen." "Cary? the baby birds must leave the nest." "Did you see-- is Cary-- is he out there?" "says the wolf." "I--stop." "I have to find" "I have to find him." "young." "Not too young." "Careful." "I bite." "me too." "Don't." "Did you ever eat an animal that was still living?" "There's a..." "Smell." "A heat." "You're burning up." "Cary!" "Cary!" "my love." "But there's just no place to go." "Amy:" "Nobody wants you here." "What?" "I said you're unwanted." "I have friends." "They only pretend to like you." "See?" "You know I'm right." "Your whole life you've felt it." "You're a freak." "You're disgusting. it's all we can do to keep from puking whenever you're around." "Stop!" "my love?" "Yes." "I-I'm here." "I've waited." "i-i understand." "I-I'm on my way." "I don't understand." "Why can't you just talk to me?" "David." "Our session's not until the morning." "I just-- have you seen Syd?" "Have I seen her?" "No." "But it is a locked ward." "So she shouldn't be too hard to find" "I've looked everywhere." "Sit." "Please." "I'm starting to wonder if she's really the right girl for you." "What do you-- we're in love." "Do you know what love is?" "A chemical." "Electrons in your brain sending signals." "Are you familiar with ophiocordyceps unilateralis?" "It's a fungus that infects ants." "really." "The spores take over their central nervous systems bursting from the tops of their heads like a branch." "of course. infecting more ants." "that's what I think of." "A simple "i haven't seen her" was all i-- what is the point of all of this love? the friendships." "what is the point of babies?" "life." "What is the point of life?" "All of you running around trying to what?" "Be happy?" "Fulfilled?" "You tell me." "I'll say this." "There's only one being in the vast multiplicity of space that matters." "God." "And do you know why god matters?" "Power." "That is the point of what you call life." "The only point." "Power." "Walter understands." "Lenny:" "David... did you know that?" "My-- -your real father." "The guy that gave you away?" "I know." "Boo-hoo." "Talk about an asshole." "Always acting so holy and then gives away his only son." "Stop." "Stop. but he was wrong." "I found you." "Such a sweet little baby your very own talking fungus." "What do you he'll say..." "When he finds out?" "kid." "Come on." "you have so much potential." "You're much more powerful than I ever imagined. man!" "That'll-- a cocktail!" "right?" "But then all this love bullshit." "I'm beginning to think i have to go it alone." "Do you know what happens to you in the scenario?" "doctor..." "Please." "Lenny." "Come on." "We've known each other since the womb." "What did you do to Syd?" "shut up!" "I tried making you comfortable." "your woman." "But the fact is it's too much work." "all I need from you is your body." "well..." "I could give a shit about your mind."