"paris" " FEBRUARY 1999" "Find any?" "I don't believe you." "Where are you going?" "Look how beautiful you are." "It's unbelievable." "I wonder if I should cut it." "No, I won't let you." "It would be easier." "If you do, I'll leave you." "No, because then I'd kill you, and kill myself as well." "You're very dissuasive." "Do you love me?" "I love you." "is that all?" "I adore you." "Come on." "GOODBYE first LOVE" "When do I see you next?" "I don't know." "Soon." "Not tomorrow?" "I can't this weekend." "Let's talk on Monday." "See you, then." "I suggest you drop it." "Oh, yeah?" "Enough!" "You'll wake up Dad." "I have to tell you something." "You won't like it." "What?" "I'm dropping out of university." "You shouldn't do that." "I've made up my mind." "I haven't been in months." "You'll regret it your whole life." "I'll go mad if I keep on going." "I'm leaving with Julien and Mathias." "Back to South America." "When your father hears this, he'll take back the studio and stop giving you money." "I know. I'll manage." "Really?" "Will you be taking Camille?" "She says if I leave, she'll jump into the Seine." "Claude?" "Heard of Jacques-Emile Blanche?" "Yeah." "It's pretty." "Have it appraised." "Go to Drouot." "But why do you want to sell it?" "You should hold on to it." "If you're sure, I have a friend who'd want it." "Where did you get it?" "My grandfather left it to me." "My parents will be upset but I have no choice." "I don't have enough to leave in September, especially if we decide to stay longer." "You're wearing make-up." "No need to do that for me." "I thought we were going to meet this week." "Did you go out every night?" "Forget it, I don't want to know." "I was mostly with Mathias and Julien." "We talked about our expedition." "And I went to a lousy party in a shitty club in the suburbs." "Everyone was there to fuck and do drugs." "I took nothing and screwed no one." "Good for you!" "Because I love you too much." "So why do you go to those parties rather than see me?" "I don't want to become too dependent." "I'm afraid it'll be even harder." "Camille... you know how tough it is to sleep without you?" "Not to see you when I wake up?" "I can't live without you." "Yeah, right." "Why do you never believe me?" "Your friends always get priority." "You're obsessed with your trip." "Don't be jealous. lt's ridiculous." "Easy for you to say." "I spend my life waiting for you." "I work nonstop and spend every night at my parents'." "Go out, then." "I don't even want to." "That's your right, as well." "You don't give a shit." "You're such a pain!" "Why do you want to fight?" "I was so happy to come for lunch and you spoil everything." "Sorry, but I'd rather leave." "Sullivan!" "Give me a hand." "Dad's eating out." "I have no idea who with." "Your brother came and left, as usual." "No one called?" "No one." "Oh, yes" " Delphine." "She needs her history book." "Pull yourself together." "Stop moping." " lt's not your thing." " What isn't?" " Relationships." " l told you I was happy." "I'm allowed to be sad sometimes." "All Sullivan does is make you cry." "Tears ofjoy." "I cry because I'm melancholic." "You were full of life before you met him." "It's been a year." "Time to move on." " He's the one." " You're 15!" "Don't be stupid." "Don't get worked up over someone who doesn't care about you." "What do you know?" "Go and see a film or something." "Do some exercise." "Tone up." "You're skinny." "Love is all I care about." " lt's all I live for." " Spare me." "Here's your father." " You're insensitive." " That's right." "I'm not melancholic enough." "I won't mention him again." "Darling... can you get me a cup of coffee?" "Lukewarm as usual." "What about a decent coffee machine?" "If you're not happy, go to a cafe." " l'll use the microwave." " Fine." "Damn brat." "Thanks, darling." "So, what are your plans for the weekend?" "I see." "My Romeo..." "My baby, my sweetheart... I thought you'd dumped me." "That I'd never see you again." "Are you mad?" "You know I love you." "I love you so much." "You disappeared again." "You could have called." " You're cruel." " Please, no fights." "You're so pretty." "I'm going to eat you." "Wait." "You drive me crazy." "Where are you taking me?" "Not to have sex... I certainly hope so." "You stay here." "Why?" "You don't deserve it." "That's for sure." "We need to talk." "Again?" "What about?" "We've said it all." "Come on." " l'm not an animal." " You are." "Let's snuggle." "You didn't come for nothing." "I brought some work." "I have a maths test on Monday." "You won't get off this easily!" "I'll rape you!" "Oh, not that!" "Little pervert." "How are you?" "This is Sullivan." "He may have a nice Jacques-Emile Blanche." "We want your opinion." "Come on, 3,000." "Stop it." "It's a pretty painting, but it's a fake." "The signature's phoney." "And it's tiny!" " But real." " Honestly, it isn't." "It's a fake." "2,500 is enough, as a favour to you." "No regrets?" "Paris-CDG to Caracas on TAP Portugal, Friday September 10th at 6:40 pm." "Hi there!" "Are you mad?" " l can even make it to you from here." " Yeah, right." "Get down." "Idiot!" "Let's go and pick our room." "Not bad." "Perfect." "It's the children's room." "Why not take one that's got more space?" "To avoid searching for you in the bed." "There's no one." "It's my dream house." "Hurry up, I want you." "Sex... always sex!" "The only thing you care about." "Wouldn't you rather read for a change?" "We have all our lives to be serious." "Let's make the most of our youth." "Whatever you say." "Are you getting up soon?" "I'll go shopping, then." "Where were you?" "Visiting the whole of the Ardeche?" "Don't be like that." "I told you I didn't want to be alone in the house." "I can't trust you." "I don't want you to go." "What will I do without you?" "You can't put everything on my shoulders." "You have to live your life as well." "We have to have experiences to share, or else..." "Or else what?" "Scared you'll get bored?" "Yeah, maybe." "And that you'll get bored, too." "I'll never get bored." "You'll meet lots of girls and leave me." "I'm not going there to meet girls." "I'm going to do something good, to work, to learn..." "To become a real person." "And our life is worth nothing?" "I mean nothing to you?" "You know you're not nothing." "I love you, Camille." "But you want to be everything." "That's not possible." "You're everything to me." "If I lost you, I wouldn't survive." "When you say that, it really makes me want to leave you." "You're so harsh." "No, you are." "Me?" "With your lack of understanding, your threats." "Come on..." "Let go of me!" "I'm sick of your tears." "Because you don't love me." "You drive me crazy." "Say it again and it's really over!" "I'm leaving and I'll be back in ten months." "It's not the end of the world." "It's ready!" "Mustard?" "Goodbye, Sullivan." "Have a safe trip." "Cheer up." "It'll go quickly, you'll see." "He fell very sick and died in 1924." "Lenin left a will." "In it he supported his old friend, Leon Trotsky." "Camille, my love, I'm writing after three days on the road, three nights with no bed." "I touched the ground only to change buses." "You're so far. I miss you so much, I feel I'm going to die." "Tomorrow we have free time." "I'll be able to call you, but I won't." "Don't be upset." "Hearing you without touching you is hard enough, but your tears and reproaches break my heart." "Each time we speak I feel so awful afterwards, and I imagine it's the same for you." "My long silences annoy you." "But how can I share my experiences with you?" "How can I tell you about my trip if each detail hurts and you take everything as an insult?" "As if what I experience is against you, against us." "That's not true." "I love you with all my soul and this love is the most precious thing I have." "I carry it always." "Don't ever forget that." "Go and see your father." "Ask if he needs help." "I've been in the mountains for 10 days, stranded in a refuge on a blue river, nestled amid gorges and waterfalls." "Everything here is peaceful." "The forest fills you." "Every day I feel further from my life in Paris, from the people I knew." "I'm lost in search of a possibly utopian peace." "In Paris, all I'd find is balance." "When allowed to change, I grow closer to myself and this ideal." "But you won't let me run away." "You follow me wherever I go." "I look for you while kissing others." "I think I love you, but I want you to disappear." "I don't want to mean anything to you." "It was a dream." "Not much remains of what we thought we said." "This was invented by a German philosopher, Leibniz, who is very much the basis of the character of the philosopher." "Leibniz's maxim, which Voltaire oversimplifies, is that all's for the best in the best of all possible worlds." "What's on for this afternoon?" "Reading?" "Maybe." "You have nothing more fun?" "It's time to turn the page." "Isn't it, my darling?" "Girls, you're late." "You have two minutes to change." "It's at the end of the corridor." "I go crazy standing around for hours." "I can't even manage to think." "Not my carpaccio!" "Don't be mean." "It's all I have for dinner tonight." "So hands off my carpaccio." "What shall I eat, then?" "You can't let me starve to death." "Have some cheese." " ls there any bread?" " Nope." "Have crackers." "Have you seen your father?" "We had dinner last week." "What's his girlfriend like?" "I hear she's quiet." "You won't make me talk." "I'm not trying to." "I don't care." "What do you think?" "I'm happy for him!" "Your project has its strong points." "As for its unusual logic you've shown a certain rigour." "And yet... my problem lies deeper." "Student housing isn't just for walking around, spiritual awakening or whatever." "I like how you make use of the site." "You want to work on horizontality?" "Fine." "But it has to be functional." "The covered terraces, the trees, the enlarged pond - why not?" "The reflections in the water are nice." "So is the footbridge to the library." "But where will the students live?" "There obviously aren't enough." "And they're too small." "Cupboards." "Elegant, with big windows, but cupboards." "In the winter, who'd want to walk two miles around the lake to go and eat?" "You put too much importance on the water, and not enough on the living quarters." "In fact, your project is more suitable for solitary retreat than communal living." "What you've imagined... is a monastery." ""A house must please everyone," ""unlike a work of art, which doesn't have to please." ""Art is the artist's private matter." ""This is not the case for houses." ""Art is born without its need being felt." ""Houses, on the other hand, fulfil a need." ""People seek to maintain their comfort." ""They hate whatever wrenches them from their certitudes," ""whatever bothers them." ""This is why they love their houses" ""and hate art."" "Four years - and what?" "Nothing but silence." "Every day is another day without him." "But I have a vocation." "It's a reason to live." "Isn't that enormous?" "Where's Camille?" "Shit." "I meant to warn you." "Why not?" "Because." "I don't feel like it." "You're bothering me." "You're something!" "Sleep here if you want." "Just don't touch me." "is everyone here?" "Alexander, shut the door." "Today I'd like to speak about the shape of something." "And the thing in question is a glimmer." "What shape would it have?" "What is a glimmer, really?" "A very faint light." "Where can it come from?" " A candle." " What else?" "A gaze." "A reflection." "Something shiny." "We say "glimmer of hope"." " indeed." " Twilight or dawn." "Glimmers of daybreak." "is the connotation of this word positive or negative?" "A glimmer." "is it something you want to see?" "What does it evoke for you?" "Its form, its representation." "It's the remains..." "The trace light leaves." "It's what escapes darkness." "In general, a glimmer implies two things - light and darkness." "What do you think?" "This weekend I was reading a text by Tadao Ando, in which he said that houses no longer contain" ""an area with a glimmer of anything," ""where anything happens."" "Think that over because it's what's missing in your projects." "The problem is you seem to take light for granted." "Something is missing, a nuance that would make all the difference." "Something we might call the journey." "The way you approach light is too... literal, too mechanical." "It should also be a way of expressing doubts." "Start it all over from scratch." "Rethink the building from the inside, from the darkness, as if starting from a shadowy mass." "And to get started, tell me each a word you associate with darkness." "Don't think first." "The point is not to be original." " Night." " Emptiness." " A secret." " Death." "You see?" "Architecture must grapple with all of these words." "But first, there's something else, something essential, that's linked to all of them." "The past?" "Almost." "Memory." "They asked me to submit another proposal." "We sent it last week." "They still haven't paid us from before?" "I'm coming." "Laura, can you continue?" "What's visible here is only half the project." "It's like an iceberg." "Imagine this gate as the representation of an ideal city, extremely well planned, and at its cultural pinnacle." ""And they absorb flatly" ""and functionally the pictorial world in silent joy."" "I haven't had time to tell you, but I like your new house a lot." "In your work, there's a... courage and maturity rare for your age." "What brought you to architecture?" "I don't know." "Places affect me and I need to get a hold on them." "I feel like I understand their language." "It's the only thing I could move mountains for." "How did you become an architect?" "At first I didn't want to be one." "I wanted to be a clarinettist." "I had a problem and couldn't continue." "Regret it?" "No, not at all." "It's a nice profession but too solitary for me." "It would be a shame to leave without taking a dip." "And I wanted to show you this site, which I find amazing." "Before, no one used to come here, between the airport and the industrial zone." "But ever since they built this, people started coming." "They come from Copenhagen to spend the day." "It's recreational and it respects its environment." "It's peaceful despite its proximity to the airport, it's sheltered from the wind, and I suggest we go and check it out." "Solitude isn't weighing me down for once." "The clouds seem to be parting." "I'm just coming." "What do you want to do?" "We said we'd go to the Louvre." "Aren't you sick of museums?" "Not at all." "I'm making up for lost time." "You never talk about yourself." "I don't want to bore you with my stuff." "I'd rather talk about more interesting things." "Your life's not interesting?" "Your family?" "That's not it, but... I'm in the middle of a divorce." "It's hard." "It's the last thing I want to think about with you." "My son Nils lives with his mother." "You never see him." "I do. I go to Berlin every weekend." "Except the ones you spend with me." "Except those." "Like you, I feel no nostalgia." "Only the future counts." "These past years, up until we met, were nothing, a void." "Just a lot of pain." "You shouldn't reason like that." "At your age, nothing is in vain." "Life is never what you expect." "Your fantasy version of the world is doomed to failure." "It's up to you to create one that's deeper, more... real." "That's how you become yourself." "Next time at the Louvre, let's follow the same path we did today." "So everything fixes in place." "I need to do things twice so they stick in my memory." "Don't throw away the lamps." "Put them in storage." "And the balustrades?" "Shall we remove them?" "It's in the files." "They're perfect." "Don't walk there!" "Don't be foolish." "It's fine..." "The granite's in perfect shape." "After a century of wear and tear." "It's stunning." "Remember the granite floors in Dessau?" "Look how sophisticated the guttering is." "Yes, I know." "The column and the pipe are perfectly aligned." "The water lands in this open box." "The tube came here, just an inch above." "Very attractive, playing the cylinder off the square." "Will you keep it?" "Let me show you." "The column." "The box." "We'll restore the glass bricks so the water is visible, like it's following its course." "It's important that the column does not touch the box, which acts as a conduit." "The water is channelled, but free." "I want to put back my window on the first floor." "Because it's missing." "Quiet." "It's an embassy." "No need to make it a bunker." "Selma?" "How are you?" "How's Sullivan?" "Still in South America?" "He came back a while ago." "Thank God." "If ever he wants to say hi." "OK, I'll tell him." "I thought about the windows." "I want to rework them." "Let's put the air vents elsewhere." "They'll say no." "I don't care." "They dug too deep." "I can't stand it any more." "We had to tear down a wall that was fine!" "Come and have a look!" "You'll see." "You're paying!" "It'll be approved next week." "Anne will send it." "I called you on Friday about a broken generator." "You sent someone." "Three hours later it broke again." "It's Sullivan." "Can you call me?" "I don't dare." "Do you still have your studio?" "I don't live in Paris." "I've been in Marseille for three years." "But I come and go often." "To see friends and family." "For work, too." "I didn't come for you." "I figured." "And you're working?" "I'm a photographer." "That's what you wanted." "For the local press." "Human-interest stories." "A friend and I began a small company." "We're handymen." "That's the money I live off of." " Do you like Marseille?" " Yeah, I do." "In Paris I never felt like I fitted in." "It depresses me here." "A friend of mine has a place in Cassis." "We go swimming every weekend." "Let's go. I want to take a walk." "I work here for a Norwegian architect." "I hope I'll have my own firm in a few years." "You're an architect?" "I'm impressed." "I'd never have imagined." "What did you think I'd become?" "I don't know." "Never thought about it." "Do you live nearby?" "At Bastille." "But I'm moving in with my boyfriend." "Have you been together long?" "Long enough." "I love him as much as I loved you, but differently." "Our relationship changed me." "It gave me strength." "Sorry I hurt you so much." "You wanted to stay free." "It seems so far away now." "It was another person, another life." "Are you seeing anyone?" "I was with a girl for a while, but we just broke up." "Otherwise... just flings." "Flings." "Not you?" "Nothing at all." "That's a shame." "It hurts to hear you say that." "You can't imagine." "I didn't mean to hurt you." "I was just talking... I have to go." "Already?" "I have something at seven on the other side of Paris." "Get going, then." "..replace the concrete pit with four metal structures." "Zinc finish." "Rework this plot of land." "Make smaller, more viable units." "Can you come?" "It's urgent." "And add... thin strips of lawn... I'm bleeding." "You're bleeding?" "Since when?" "An hour ago." "I called the doctor." "It was a miscarriage." "There are some tests to do." "I loved my little baby." "I know." "Will we have others?" "Of course." "Why?" "I was ready." "You have time." "You're young enough." "You're in too much of a hurry." "I'm so lucky l found you." "It's a miracle." "I'm the lucky one." "You're the light of my life." "I lost track of the time." "Lots of friends to see." "Short trip." "I almost left." "Thanks for staying." "Why are you here?" "Repainting an apartment." "I'm working like crazy." "Our firm won a bid and they made me project manager." "I didn't expect it so soon." "That's great." "Let's see if there's room upstairs." "But the pressure is enormous." "Maybe I won't be strong enough." "I'm sure you're strong enough." "It's here." "Very nice." "I almost forgot." "From last summer." "Not in front of me." "If you prefer." "Go back to your architect." "What a bad film!" "You didn't like it?" "Too bad." " You did?" " A lot!" "No way." "What did you like?" "The characters, the dialogue, the story." "Everything." "I don't understand you." "It's so French!" "The actors are annoying." "It's talky, complacent." "I thought it was awful." "You just don't get it." "It's beautiful and deep." "You're not sensitive enough." "I don't even want to discuss it." "I see you still have a monopoly on sensitivity." "And I see we still never agree." "That's the only thing we can agree on." "We have no common taste." "But we agree on the essential." "I don't think so." "But it doesn't stop me from loving you." "I'll always love you and never know why." "Stop it." "It's true." "What do you think?" "Abandoning me?" "As if I wanted to leave... lt's your fault if you leave." "Stay instead!" "Be careful. I read some scary things in the papers." "It's in the north, in Sanaa." "Not Aden." "I'll call you when I land." "Anything wrong?" "You're not glad to see me?" "I thought about you all week." "Should we go and have a drink?" "I just want to be with you." "Just me and you." "But it's impossible." "It is possible." "We have all night, even." "You're crazy... lt's not what you wanted?" "Yes, but... what about after?" "Tomorrow?" "What happens then?" "I've missed you so much." "How could we have stayed apart so long?" "You left me." "Did you forget?" "No." "I never stopped loving you." "Not for a minute, not for a second." "I have you inside me like a disease." "Don't say that." "The window won't open." "It's this duct behind it." "We had no choice." "We said to put the duct here by the chimney." "We'd have to have rebuilt it, rewire everything, break the screed." "We don't have time." "Check the plans." "We'll do just as it says." "I have music." "I brought blankets." "I even have food for after." "After what?" "After we make love." "You're always hungry after." "You have it all planned." "So how's the bed?" "You're no longer the pure girl from before." "My heart is still as pure." "But you're unfaithful." "You're cheating on a man you love, who loves you." "That's my problem." "I'm so happy to see you again." "That's Nils' room." "He's Lorenz's son." "He's at his mother's." "This is the guest room." "We'll sleep in it." "It's me." "Are you there?" "You're not?" "Anyone home?" "No one?" "No one at all?" "You can answer if you like." "I won't talk." "I'll try your mother's." "I just got in." " For me?" " Open it." "Like it?" "Don't start crying." "I want to live with you." "I want you to be my wife." "To have kids together." "What's this?" "A nightgown, so you can take it off me." "Lights out." "I still want to see you." "I'm leaving." "My train's at five but I have to see my parents." "When will you be back?" "Not for a while." "Don't you want to come to Marseille?" "Do you want me to?" "You'll see where l live." "And meet my friends." "Goodbye." "He used the bus lane, went through some red lights and resisted arrest." "A suspect on the run from police who were involved in a high-speed chase on the slippery streets of the capital." "I forgot to say - l'm spending the weekend in Normandy with Anna." "When?" "Tomorrow?" " And me?" " You're staying." "I see." "You're leaving tomorrow." "Yes, tomorrow." "OK." "That's not very cool." "I've just got back." "I know, but I've already put it off a few times." "Once more and she'll kill me." "And I'm not invited?" "It's just girls." "OK, OK." "Good." "Great." "OK, OK." "You always say OK." "Damn it, then!" "It's that arsehole. I have to answer." "Delayed" "Services are being disrupted by strike action" "Passengers are advised to reschedule journeys" "CANCELLED" "Don't worry, and don't be sad." "I've got lots of work, anyway." "Another time?" "I'd like a room for two nights." "Can you put these on the site?" "I've been on holiday for one day." "Guess what I did." " What did you do?" " Nothing." " Was it nice?" " lt was great." "Since Dad left, you can't imagine." "I'm alive again." "He had his good side, of course." "He wouldn't hurt a fly." "He's a very good person." "But day in, day out... what a pain in the arse." "To think I put up with it for 20 years." "It's crazy." "I love being able to stuff my face in front of the TV." "Oh, I almost forgot." "A letter for you." "I wonder who still writes to you here." "Camille, I dreamt about you while in bed with someone else." "You were expecting my child." "How can I stop thinking about it?" "I'm leaving you because it's too late or too soon to start again." "You're far from me and I'm already in enough pain." "I don't know how to love you with this love I can't control." "The ties that bind us are stronger than time." "I'm leaving you in the hope of finding you again one day when we'll be freer, older." "More worthy of our love?" "Dinner's ready." "I don't believe it." "Not him!" "When will you finally get over him?" "Lorenz?" "Where are you?" "Am I bothering you?" "Not at all." "Do you want to go down to the Loire?" "Right away?" "While there's still sun." "Can I meet you in half an hour?" "Take a stick for the snakes." "And put on a hat."