"Oh, it's lovely." "Just lovely." "A lot of girls cry when they see themselves in a wedding dress." "Every little girl's dream." "Or nightmare." "You know." "If you're fat." "Hello." "Do you do girls?" "It says here "Yes" to anal, GFE, school uniform;" ""No" to scats, stags and water sports." " You've got nothing against girls." " What's the set-up?" "Threesome." "The client wants two girls." " Who's the other one?" " I haven't booked one yet." " What about Rachel?" " No, she's in Marbella." " Tanya?" " She's going to see Les Mis." "Again?" "How many times is that?" "Who knows?" "It's a sickness." "And what's the client like that one of us isn't enough?" "It's Ashok." "Ashok?" "Every-second-Wednesday-since- I-started Ashok?" "The very same." "Sometimes, two heads are better than one." "I'll find someone and call you back." "It's not that I don't like going down on girls." "It's just that I never really enjoy going out with them." "You're supposed to be helping me find a suit." "I know." "Can you undo this?" "I'm trapped." "So?" "What do you think?" "When is it again?" "8th March." "1979?" "You look like you've just stepped out of my parent's wedding photo." " Jesus." " Excuse me." "It's bad luck to see the bride in her gown before the big day." "It's all right." "She's not the bride." "She's just here to help." "I told my best friend that I'm a prostitute." "He hasn't said a thing." "We're both acting like everything's fine but, of course, it's not." "So, the night your sister had a baby " "I can't believe I'm asking!" "Were you working as a prostitute?" "Were you doing that when we were still seeing each other?" "No!" "No." "And you have, like...er..." "What is it?" "A madam?" "An agent." "Yeah." "She's the filter." "She always knows where I am." "Is it even legal?" "Me?" "Yeah." "But her." "Not exactly." "Why do you do it?" "Would you believe me if I said I enjoyed it?" "You know I like sex." "So what is it you're doing tonight?" "It's a threesome." "Me and another girl from the agency." " Who's the...?" " It's Ashok." "He's lovely." " Lovely?" " Yeah." "He's lovely." "He's my oldest client." "He's like my friend." "How did you even get into it?" "Hello?" "It's all arranged." "You'll be working with Naomi." " Who's Naomi?" " She's new." "I poached her from Brompton Escorts." "She's flying off the shelves." "If you know what I mean." "The room is booked from eight so you two can get to know each other." " And it's that hotel close to " " Ashok's office." "I know." "Well, he'll be there by nine." "Lucky boy." "I'm sending him the creme de la creme." "Do you want to go and look at some more suits?" "I should go." " Yeah." "How much...?" " No, it's all right." "I'll pay." " I've got it." " No, it's fine." " See you later." " Yeah." "I'll give you a call." "How did you even get into it?" "A couple of years ago I met a man in a bar" "UHe was a perfect one night stand." "Funny." "Charming." "Great in bed." "And no expectations." "And he even gave me my cab fare home." "Or so I thought." "And just like that, without realising," "I'd been paid for sex." "Would I have taken the money if it had been offered up front?" "Maybe." "I don't really know." "Either way, I did take it and I'm still taking it." "Today, a threesome with another escort." "I'm hardly a girl's girl but I will go gay for pay." "Hello." "So..." "Ashok." "What's he like?" "He's sweet." "Quite handsome." "Athletic." "Clever." "Kind of geeky." "Gentle." "Very polite." "And he always smells nice." "I was actually wondering whether he prefers anal or vanilla." "So, what's he into?" "Naughty school girls?" "Nurse and matron?" "Mother Superior or novice nun?" "Well, this is his first threesome." "I think so." "So maybe just generic stuff." " Girls soaping each other's breasts." " Holiday Inn porn." "Or maybe... ..we should make something up." " Like what?" " How about good cop, bad cop?" "Ah." "I'll put you down for good cop, then." "This is all quite fun." "You know." "What normal girls do." "Oh, I forgot to ask." "Do you shave or wax?" "Wax." "Good." "I get stubble rash." "Hey, don't look so scared." "Just getting into character." "Hello." "One, two, three..." "Are we nearly there yet?" "I'm getting wanker's claw." "Relax a bit." "I need to pee." "Can you take over?" "OK." " You're quite the athlete." " You're quite flexible yourself." "Thanks." "I wish I could say it was down to Yoga." "What?" "You two." "Debriefing." "But I suppose put two nurses or two teachers or whatever together in a room and they're gonna talk about work." "I'm glad you think of us as a caring profession." "I do, though." "I read that book you gave me." "And?" "384 pages of misery." "And the world's smallest type face but beautiful." "Really beautiful." "I cried like a girl." "What time is it?" "I should get home." " It's quarter to ten." " Is that all?" "It didn't last long." "Oh, don't worry." "A job shared is usually a job halved." "So for you two, that means half the work for double the money." "I'm sorry." "Are you auditing us?" " No!" " Good." "Thank you for a wonderful evening." " And thank you" " You're welcome." "The pleasure was half mine." "That was fun." "Would you...erm..." "like to hang out sometime?" " Does it involve shagging?" " No." "Does it involve eating Hagen Dazs and watching Pretty Woman?" " Christ." "No." " Then yes." "What's your number?" "No, fuck that." "What's your name?" "Hannah." "What's yours?" "Naomi." "Hello?" "Hello." "What are you up to now?" "Best present a client ever gave you?" "Hm." "Mini convertible." "Worst present a client ever gave you?" " A hotel sewing kit." " What?" "Can you believe that?" "Just cos it's not ringing doesn't mean it's broken." " Boyfriend?" " Friend." "He's not taking it that brilliantly." "The whole" ""I'm not a legal secretary" thing." "Hm." "I still find it harder telling girls." "They might give you a feminist polemic." "What they're really thinking is you're gonna steal their man." "Girls bug me." "Me too." "Half the time they're right." "I've never really got the whole female friendship thing." "With Naomi, we can talk about men and... sex." "And work." "Because, for us, they're all the same thing." "I go in there to get my cervix scraped." " Scraped?" "!" " ..and you walk out with a bloody party bag!" "It wasn't much of a party bag." "No fairy cakes." "No hats." "Just..." "Balloons." "Did you leave them with anything?" "Ooh, there was a lovely speculum swab set I had my eye on." "But in the end, I just took the condoms." "And some pens." "Come on." "Let's go." "Before you make me take them back." "I've got a new client for you." "28." "Works for an auction house." "Sounds like a Pathe News reel." "Quite junior now but got prospects." "Well, so he tells me." "I'm shagging him, Stephanie, not settling down with him." " When is it?" " Next Wednesday." "Well, it depends." "Wednesday's my regular with Ashok." "Actually, Ashok is with Naomi this week." "What?" "Ashok is with Naomi this week." "Can you do the auctioneer or not?" " Not." " Fine." "Call me when you've learnt to share." "The end of the affair was written from the beginning." "He's a man who pays women for sex." "I'm the whore." "At some point his tastes were bound to change." "So why am I so upset?" "Because who can I call to say I had a bad day at work?" "Hi." "Hi." "How are you?" "I'm good." "Yeah." "How are you?" "Yeah." "Good." "Good." "Actually, I'm shit." "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "What's the matter?" "I lent someone a book and I don't think I'm gonna get it back." "I wish I had your problems." "Will you come round?" "You looked good in that wedding dress." "I can't remember if I said that." "I don't think I did." "Did you find a suit?" "No." "They were all as shit as 1979." "So I'm gonna wear a kilt." " Since when were you Scottish?" " My mum's granddad or something." "I love that about posh English." "Always trying to pass themselves off as Scottish or Welsh without even being to Scotland." "Hellish place." "I've missed you." "I missed you too." "While you were off playing with fanny." "I'm sorry about that." "The other day." "It's just something huge about you I didn't know." "You're my best mate." "You're the only girl I've shagged who still likes me." "Except for Vanessa." "Yeah." "Except for Vanessa." "We go out and... we have dinner and we get pissed." "And we go running and we used to sleep together." "Am I ever going to be able to talk to you about this?" "I dunno." "Try." "Even if I act like a cock about it, I'd want you to try." "I need to ask you something." "It's a favour." "You don't have to if you don't want to." "You're not gonna ask me to have sex with you and Vanessa?" "What?" "No." "Others may pay hundreds for you but" "I had you when all it took was half a lager and a couple of Marlboro Lights." "Will you be my best man?" "I slept with somebody and now he won't leave." "I don't normally do this kind of thing." "Can't you just tell him his time is up?" "Thank you." "I didn't charge him." "That's the problem." "You're not really a legal secretary, are you?" " Hi." " Hi." "Look, just go!" "Some girls are too sensitive for this kind of work." "You need to get some perspective, Han." "See how normal people live." " Normal people?" " You know what I mean." " Yeah, that sounds dead exciting." " Can't you just take a break?" "Did you hear me?" "I said go!" "It's not just restaurants and actors that worry about bad reviews." "Working girls are subject to public opinion, too." "Oh!" "Listen to this:" "Tanya is a stunning brunette, with a great body and even better technique." "God!" "Are all your clients easily pleased or just that one?" " Whore." " That's enough." "I'm seeing a new girl at two." "Speak now or forever hold your peace." "Nothing to report." " What?" " Nothing." "What?" ""This girl has a decent body but sadly she has no idea how to use it."" ""No amount of prodding on my part would persuade her to get excited."" ""The word frigid springs to mind."" "Who listens to the critics anyway?" "42." "Architect." "Nothing kinky." "You interested?" "It's midnight." "I was asleep." "That's no problem." "It's an in call." "You just stay right where you are." "I don't take clients in the middle of the night." "Really?" "If I was in your position, I don't think I would be turning down any work." " What's that supposed to mean?" " Well, you know when they said" ""all publicity is good publicity"?" "Yeah." "They lied." "Normally, I don't interrupt my sleep for anyone." "But since my slating by the critics, work's been a bit slow." "If this goes on for much longer, I might have to start using public transport again." "Hello." "Hi." "I'm Lewis." "I think we have an appointment." "Yeah." "Come on up." " Hi." " Hi." " Come in." " Thank you." "I had a terrible time trying to park." "Oh, yeah." "It gets busy around here..." "But never mind, you're here now." "Oh, sorry." "Right." "Actually, I was going to take your coat." "But we might as well get this out the way." "Right." "Sorry." "Relax." "Would you like to go through?" "Can I er... get you a drink?" "No." " Thank you." "I'm fine." " Alright." "Where are you going?" "Just to make a call." " To who?" " A friend." "Why would you do that?" "Look, it's OK." "I'm going to check in with the agent and tell her you're here." "We do it all the time." "Why?" "Well... it's... just procedure - to keep us safe." " Us." "You mean you." " Yes." "I mean me." "Just in case you turn out to be a mad axe murderer or something." "You've used that line before." "Course not." "Come over here." "I will once I've made a quick call." "I don't want you to call anyone." "I've paid for you." "Now come over here." "If I don't call the agency, they'll call me." "Did she tell you what I want?" "Your boss - did she tell you what I asked for?" " Yes." " Good." "Please take your clothes off." " Listen, I think..." " Please." "Take your clothes off." "No." "I think you should go." "I can't." "Yeah." "I really do." "Look, it's supposed to be my night off." "This is all a big mistake." "Here, look." "A full refund." "You don't like me, do you?" "Look..." "I like you." "I need to get my beauty sleep, that's all." "You look all right to me." "Look, just go." "Did you hear me?" "I said go!" "Sorry." "I didn't mean to scare you." "You know nothing scares me." "Except poodles." "It's the fur." "It's too curly." "Not as scary as bloody weddings." "Ooh..." "Do you know that one of the first things that people notice at a wedding is the shape and texture of the napkins." " No." "I did not know that." " Course you didn't, because you're not mental." "Vanessa's been on at me about napkins all day." "Reckons they should be folded in the shape of doves." "Can you believe that?" "I mean, these are items used to wipe food off your face." "Why have they got to be shaped like doves?" "Yeah." "Why can't we all just use our sleeves?" "Yes, exactly." "No-one will care about your napkins." "Well, I'm sorry my life's not quite as exciting as yours." "I didn't mean it like that." "All right." "What have been up to today?" "It's all right, you can tell me." "There's no children around." "What's wrong?" "Nothing." "Bollocks." "Tell me." "No." "It doesn't matter." "Tell me." "It's just, this guy got a bit weird." "He scared me a bit." " Did he hurt you?" " No." "Really." " Is that work?" " Yeah." "Don't get it." "What?" "If that's how you talked to your client, no wonder he complained." "That client was a nutter." "What are you doing sending me guys like that?" "I thought you could handle it." " You've dealt with him before?" " Cleo didn't want to see him any more." "So you passed him on to me." "Some girls are too sensitive for this kind of work." "I see, you are just a pimp these days." "That's good to know." "What a difference a year makes." "Look at you - pretty, beautifully turned out." "No need to be nervous." "Just gonna ask you a couple of questions." "First of all, A-levels?" "Yeah." "History, English, politics and general studies." "No." "I mean, do you do anal?" "Oh!" "In that case, yes." "Yes to anal." "Excellent." "Well, people get so bored these days, don't they?" "It's not good if you don't do anal." "You probably want to know a bit about me." "I am going to keep you safe." "I'm gonna be like a best friend to you, Hannah." "A best friend who takes 40% and doesn't tell you her real name." "Do you wanna see my dove?" "Bad dove." " That bloke could have really hurt you." " He didn't." "Why can't you just admit you were scared?" "Anyone would be, Han." "I mean, look at you." "I bet he was like twice your size" " strange bloke in your flat " " It was a one off." "I don't normally take clients in the middle of the night." " Then why did you?" " Cos I needed the work!" " It's just the way it is." "You get a bad review on-line " " A what?" "The punters review us on the net." "You get a bad write up and then you're left with the dregs no-one else wants." " And that's just the way it is?" "!" " Yeah, in my line of work it is." "You've lost the plot." "You need some perspective, Han." " See how normal people live." " Normal people?" " You know what I mean." " Yeah, sounds dead exciting." "Can't you just take a break?" "Please." "See what other people get up to." "For me." "Tenner says you don't miss it." "I'm not sure I like how the other half live." "Hello?" "You're very very hungry and you're absolutely dying to have lunch with me." "Sorry, can't." "I thought normal people got a lunch break?" "Not when they've gotta meet their vodka supplier who's always late and never invoices us on time." "It means I've got to to through every single box on my own." "All right." "I get it, I get it!" "Another time." "OK." "Bye." "Now I'm really desperate." "It's my sister." "Hi, Jackie." "Yeah." "It's me." "Yeah." "Really?" "Do you wanna go out for some lunch today?" "Oh... mother and baby group." "What's a ?" "Jamboli?" "?" "OK." "Well, enjoy that." "Oh..." "Bye." "Day one of Belle's break from work." "Guess what?" "I miss it." "So, "Tim." Hi." "What would you buy your best friend and his uptight fiancee for their wedding?" "Preferably something that looks more expensive than it actually is." "It depends." "Would the bride appreciate some elegant crockery she'll never dare use or... a pointless gadget she won't know how to use." " Are those the only choices?" " I'm afraid so." "She once bought me an electic tin opener for my birthday." "Ahh!" "Well..." "So, she's a fan of the useless gadget." "You're not really into this wedding-list thing, are you?" "Believe it or not, working here isn't exactly my life's ambition." "Let me guess." "Er... er... a musician?" " Artist?" " Well, I'm kind of erm..." "I'm kind of between ambitions at the moment." "Excuse me." "Now that I'm not working, I'll have to find something else to occupy my time." "More importantly..." "I'll have to start giving it away." "Morning." " Are you OK?" " Yeah." "I'm fine." "I don't normally do this kind of thing." "Yeah, me neither." "I'm really glad I did." "I mean..." "Wow." "This bed is so comfy." "I could lie here all day." "All day?" "Don't you have work?" "Day off." " So, what have you got planned for today?" " No, no, stop." "Work?" "Actually, I don't work much during the day." "Really?" "Hm." "What do you do?" "I'm a night-time legal secretary." "Nice." "Er... how about I rustle up some breakfast?" "You're not really a legal secretary, are you?" " Pardon?" " Oh, come on." "Who do you think you're kidding - all those massage oils in the bathroom." "The only person who would need all that is a professional." "You're a masseuse." " You found me out." " I knew it." "Why didn't you say?" "Erm..." "I'm just a bit shy about it." "I'm still in training." "You know, if you tell people you're a masseuse, they tend to assume that you're er..." " Y-you know..." " Yeah." "Well, if you ever need someone to practise on." "Er... pitted olive?" "I slept with someone last night and now he won't leave." "Can't you just tell him his time is up?" "You idiot!" "I didn't charge him and that's the problem." "Oh dear." "You really do have something for everyone." "Yeah." "Some of my friends have really weird tastes." "Actually, I'm getting a bit hungry." "You know, so hungry it hurts." "Why don't we go and get some lunch, somewhere else?" "Oh, well, I..." "I mean, that sounds great, but I've got a few things to do this afternoon." "Oh." "OK." "No worries." " I'm not just saying that." " I know." "I'm not." "I mean, I really do have things to do." "Like... the carpet, for example." "It's just... filthy." "Is this your way of telling me that you have a boyfriend?" "It took you long enough." "Hi." " A friend of Hannah's?" " Er... yeah." " Who are you?" " Oh, I'm Ben, her fiance." "Shame." "I thought he was going to jump out the window." "So, have you gone back to being an amateur?" "Temporarily." "Is that just so you can have sex in the Olympics?" "Only if the government covers all my training costs." " He seemed nice." " Yeah." "He was nice." "And?" "And... ..he was... normal." "Look, I've tried to be like everyone else." "But..." "I'm just not the kind of girl who has a normal job and fucks normal men she meets in bars and in a wedding shop - don't ask?" "But I'm still me." "I'm still your mate." "I'm happy, Ben." "I love what I do, and this is my normal now." "So, you owe me a tenner." "We had a bet." "Remember?" " Oh, that." " Come on, cough up!" " You really missed it?" " Really." " I'm going back to work." " Are you sure?" "Abso-fucking-lutely!" "I just hope I can find some clients who haven't read my bad review." "I used to think I knew everything about you." "And then, out of the blue, I discover you like Marmite." "Our friendship could survive many things - but that?" "!" "Marmite." "That's disgusting." "For the love of God..." "Don't come anywhere near me with that." " Hannah, don't come any closer." " Don't be shy!" "Calling to see if I've starved to death yet?" "Turns out, one man's shit sandwich really is another man's creme brulee." "My phone's been ringing off the hook with clients wanting to see you." "What happened to my roasting from the critics?" "Well, the public are fickle." "It looks like you're back in favour." "I've got a wonderful man lined up for you." "His name's Martin." "35-year-old corporate lawyer, he sounds gorgeous over the phone." "And how did the last bloke you gave me sound over the phone?" " Well, I thought " " I need to make really clear." "If you do that to me again I'm leaving the agency." "But not until I've told all the girls how well you really vet the clients." " Finished?" " Depends." "You have my word." "Good." "You send the client round in an hour." "In fact, make it two," "I may have fallen a tad behind on the old beauty regime." " Thank you." " Don't thank me." "Thank the guy who wrote you that fantastic new review." "So, what do you think?" "One of my regulars?" "A secret admirer?" "Or someone who just gets me?" "Belle is the kind of girl any bloke would be lucky to have." "She's smart, beautiful and she knows exactly what she's doing." "Anyone looking for anything rough or dangerous, should go nowhere near." "Men looking for someone they can treat like a lady need look no further than Belle." "I hope you all treat her with the respect she deserves." "She's the best." "Some people might think that a person who is about to get married shouldn't be getting paid to have sex." "I can handle it, if you can." "What if I don't fancy her?" "All male escorts use Viagra." "It's standard practice." "Two people, three sexual agendas - his, hers, theirs." "The question is: are they compatible?" " It's very good." " The best." "You know how to make people feel good." "Come on, Hannah!" "Sex, like life, is often about the numbers." "With two people, the agenda's clear." "One gives, one receives." "But add a third... and a fourth." "That's when things become complicated." "See ya." "Absolutely not." "No way." "No, I can't even believe you suggested it." "Fuck off." "No." "Why not?" "You're short of a partner." "Yeah, but I wasn't asking you." "I was just... thinking aloud, telling you my problems." "Well, now it's not a problem." "Ben, this is a job." "A job you clearly have issues with." " Not amateur gang-bang night." " I know." "And I know that I can handle it." "Reckon I could do your job, do you?" "Organise the bar staff, order the drinks, do whatever it is you do?" "I think you're forgetting something." "I already know how to have sex." "Yeah, but not professionally." "Professionally?" "What exactly is it you think I do in my job?" " Hannah!" " Take the money, spread my legs, moan a bit?" " I never said that." " You have no idea." " So show me." "Come on." "Makes perfect sense." " Oh, Ben..." "I've accepted what you do." "I've told you." "It's not a problem for me." " Good." " But I still don't understand it." "I still worry." "You keep telling me how it's all OK, how safe it usually is." "Why don't you let me see for myself?" " It's not a good idea." " Why not?" "Because it's more involved than you think." "Anyway, you're about to get married." "Yeah, well, maybe that's a part of it." "What, last gasp of freedom?" "Oh, come on." "Why does it matter why I want to do it?" "It matters cos it's my job" "My reputation." "That's the point." "I don't work with just anyone." "Then work... with me." "No." "Most girls who do couples work have a regular partner." "The rest of us just point and click but not without caution." "Chiselled, classy, almost certainly gay." "Not right for this job." "Oh, I love these ones." "Amateurs with egos." "They take a few snaps of themselves in the back garden pay a fee to the agency and reckon they'll get paid to sleep around." "But I'm looking for a professional." "And how long have you been in the business?" "Three, four years." "Enjoy your work?" "Love sex." "Love women." "And what do you think you bring to a client's experience?" "12 inches." "Oh, hello." "My name's Benjamin." " Benjamin." " I'm here about the job." "I was just wondering if you could give me a few more details about the vacancy." "Well, perhaps you can tell me what you already know." "Only that it's for a foursome, and that you're short of a male partner." "And what exactly do you think the job entails?" "Sex, obviously." "Um... watching." "Being watched." "I'm aware it's a very demanding position and that not everyone can do this kind of work." "This particular couple are first-timers." "And they've booked a couples date as an anniversary present for each other." " Different." " And in this case, they've asked for a straight swap, so I'll have sex with the husband and my male partner will sleep with the wife." "Sounds good." "Can I ask you, are you in a relationship at the moment?" "I'm engaged." "And you don't consider that to be a problem?" " In what way?" " Well, some people, just some, might think that a person who's about to get married shouldn't be getting paid to have sex." "Mm." "I've always been able to separate my sex life and my emotions." " Really?" " Yeah." "My...friend says it's one of my best qualities." "She's got a similar thing, you see." "Able to emotionally detach." "Keep things separate." "She sounds like a very smart person." "Mm." "She is." "Smart, strong..." " Of course, I'd never say any of this to her." " Course." "Just sometimes she cuts her nose off to spite her face." "Oh?" "Yeah." "Doesn't always let people in, you know?" "Even though deep down she knows it could solve a lot of problems." " So I like to help her out." " Even if it causes complications?" "I can handle it if you can." "3... 2... 1..." "Do you do this every time?" "All this..." "No second chances to make a first impression." "See, this is where all the money goes." "Underwear, make-up..." "Come on." "You're loaded." "I've seen all your little rolls of cash." "Go on." "How much do you make a year?" "Have to ask my accountant, love." "Come on." "Tell me." "Turnover last year..." " £105,000." " Fuck me!" " Seriously?" " Told you you wouldn't like it." " £32,000." " Don't be ridiculous." "You can't compare." "I'm self-employed." "I have many expenses." "Laundry, booze, nibbles," " phone bills, mattresses." " Yeah, all right." "I get it." "Anyway, I worked it out once." "It costs me £20,000 a year to be Belle." " It costs £34 to be Ben." " That much?" "20 minutes and counting." "There you go." " Vodka?" " It's all you're getting." "Otherwise the clients will smell it on your breath." "Oh..." "It's all right." "Brought my own." "One?" "That's not going to get you very far." "Penis, fingers, toys, they all need their own condoms." "Basic hygiene." " Nice." " Oh, and... always use one hand on yourself and the other on your..." " On my guest?" " Exactly." "I like to keep things clean." "What if I don't fancy her?" " She'll be fine." " But what if she's not?" " What if she's a real munter?" " Doesn't matter." "When that doorbell rings, whatever's on the other side, we smile." "It's not the smiling I'm worried about." "Look," "I don't fancy half the men I sleep with." "But I look at them and I think, I could have some fun." "An adventure, and that's enough." " It'll be OK." " How do you know that?" "Because I know you." "And I know how you make people feel." "What are you on about?" "I never felt shit when we were together." "Even if I looked crap or felt fat, it didn't matter." "You know how to make people feel good." "And if you take this, you won't let anyone down." "All male escorts use Viagra." "It's standard practice." " Yeah?" " Yeah." " Belle?" " Hi, hello." "Come in." " Kate and..." " Liam." " Liam." "Hello." "This is Ben." " Hi." " Hi." "So you found us OK?" "Yeah, yeah." "It was fine." "We didn't have far." "Just..." "Hendon." " The RAF Museum." " Yeah." " Shall I take your coats?" " Thanks." " Would you like to come through?" " Thank you." " Oh, feel free." "Here." " Oh." "Thanks." "I wasn't sure." "You know, not many places you can, these days." "Well, this is one where you most certainly can." "Uh, can I get anybody a drink?" "Some champagne, maybe?" "Oh, lovely." " Seeing as we're celebrating." " Yeah. 15 years." "Can't believe it." "Well, 20, actually." "We were together for five before we got married." "That's quite an achievement." "Not quite there yet, are we, darling?" "Eight years, though." "Oh." "So you two are a real..." "I mean..." "You are together?" "We weren't sure if you'd be a...couple." "Actually, we met at university." "Oh." "Snap." "We went to Nottingham." " Newcastle." " Ah, Newcastle." "Alan Shearer." "Sting." "Coal." " Er..." "I'll just get the drinks." " Do you need a hand?" "No, darling." "I'm fine, thank you." "Um..." "I don't know if you..." "Oh, lovely." "Thank you." "Won't be a sec." "So... 20 years together, huh?" " You don't look old enough." " Ha, ha!" "Thanks." "Two people, three sexual agendas." "His, hers, theirs." "The question is, are they compatible?" "As we haven't spoken before, it would be great to know if there were something specific you want, you know, how you'd like to spend our time together." "Oh, we just thought we'd kind of play it by ear, sort of thing." "OK, that's fine." "We can do that." "And was there a particular fantasy... or something you'd like to explore?" "Actually, I did wonder if..." "I mean, I'm not a lesbian..." "I'm sure that would be something we could all enjoy." "I know I would." "What do you think, Liam?" "Yeah." "That would be great." "It's something we've often talked about, you know." "I tell you what, why don't you two have a lovely shower whilst Ben and I get everything ready?" "OK." "Darling, could you get our guests some towels, please?" "Sure." "So, am I doing all right?" "Charming, funny, incredibly knowledgeable about industrial northern cities." "Coal." "Can you believe I said that?" "Just relax, it's fine." " Is there any music you'd like?" " Oh, anything, really." "Apart from Simply Red!" "Can't be all bad." "Right, quick." "Underwear." "We need to change it." "What do you mean, change?" "I've only got these." "Mine, not yours." "This isn't right for them." "It's a bit hardcore." "Right." "What do you think?" "Retro." "Von Teese?" "I see your tastes haven't changed." "Not the only thing that hasn't changed." "Not the only thing that hasn't changed." "You said it would take at least half an hour to kick in." " Don't knock it." " I'm not." "Remember, though, she's paying for her orgasm, not yours." "Oh, my God." "Liam, come here." "Why don't you watch me and Kate have a play?" "Ben." "Ben!" "Ben." "Ben." "Come here." " You two have a good time?" " Sure we do." "Good." " No, we can't." " Why not?" " Come on, Hannah." " It's Belle, alright?" "You did well." "Didn't do anything..." "did we?" "You gave 'em what they here came for, you should feel pleased." "I just feel..." "Don't know what I feel." "It just wasn't..." "I don't know, it wasn't what I've expected." "You're alright?" "Still with that this is... excitement and then... or the anticipation, it's just adrenalin." "Thank you." "Thank you so much!" "Don't thank us." "You two were amazing." "He does it all, you're obviously still crazy about each other." "I hope we're still like you guys after 20 years." "Not so badly at all." "Thanks, Belle." "Ben." " Nice job." " You too." "Come on, you." " Bye." " Bye." "See, it's not just opening my legs and moaning, is it?" "No, it's a total mindfuck." "Sure you don't wanna take any blue little friends?" "As a gift for Vanessa?" "Fuck off!" "200." "Cheers." " Think I'll call you tomorrow." " Yeah." "It's been a... an education... keeping things separate." "You're very good." "The best." " Good night." " Night." "Sex is really a numbers game." "Group sex is complicated but that's mechanics." "For me, the hardest numbers have always been 1 plus 1." "It never seems for them to add up..." "Why do you want to be a cortisan, Belle?" "I'm ready to take the next step up the ladder." "Being at the top of my profession means I'm completely in charge." "I'm with Diamond International now." "It's been lovely, Ladies." "This is your apartment... if you want it." "No?" "What do you know about real life?" "Gonna be an Uber-whore." "But it's still fucking in the end." "You've lied about all, you alienated everyone." "For this." "For all this shit!" "Sex work, like lots of things in London, is about class." "I'm educated, so I'm expensive." "I'm expensive so I attract a certain clientele." "And some of them are connoisseurs." "We start shooting next month." "Take Mitchell Rothman..." "He's one of my more international clients." "Film producer, a multi-millionaire." "And like all Americans... a great tipper." "And I get the impression he knows his escorts." "Belle, can I say something?" "I am not a stranger to this." "And..." "I think you're kind of great." "Thank you very much." "I think you could take the next step." "Do you know Diamond International Courtesans?" "Yeah." "Do you want to get nominated?" "Really?" "Mmm." "I know them." "They listen to me." "You've got what it takes to be a courtesan." "You've got a lot of class." " What I've got is cl-aaass." " Cl-aaarrs." " Cl-aaass.." " Cl-aaass.." "I'm a high-class escort, but there's a whole level above me." "Courtesans." "They only have a few long-term clients, but they earn a fortune." "I really want to be one..." "But it's not up to me." "Belle." "I'm Della." "How lovely of you to come." " This way." " Thank you." " You're not nervous, are you?" " No." "A little bit, yeah." " You know Mitchell Rothman?" " That's right." "He's a good sort." "Is this...examples of your wardrobe?" " Ah...yeah, I though you said I should..." " Absolutely." " Shall we dive in?" " Sure." "Anna?" "Shall we go through one or two things?" "How old are you now, just for the record?" "24." "OK..." "Well..." "Our clients, they like their companions like their wine:" "Expensive... and mature." "A man who wants company for weeks wants someone with life experience." "Something to say." "I'm actually 27." "Genuinely." "I don't know why I said four." "We're a sisterhood." "We're not an agency." "Fiona and I felt there wasn't anywhere providing real upmarket quality in this industry." "So we thought we'd do it." "Wow." "That's impressive." "This is nice." "Where do you wear this?" "Ah...dinners." "If I go to a party or a ball." "Yes, this is the right colour for you." "You should avoid, um... that." "Why do you want to be a courtesan, Belle?" "It's a good question." "Um..." "I'm ready to take the next step up the ladder." "I've got great communication skills, and..." "I'm always looking for a new challenge." "At this level, it's not about the man." "It's about the woman." "Languages, etiquette, golf, knowing how to ski..." "We're not just about servicing the client, if you will." "We're genuine companions." "What you might call..." "life-style sponsors." "But it's still fucking in the end, right?" "They spoke to me in French." "I did German and Spanish." ""Je ne parle pas" a lot of French." "Hi." "Look, I know things haven't gone very well so far, and what I said in French was that" "I grew up in a small town called London which is very picturesque, but... people who know me would say..." "I'm clever." "I'm discreet, I'm strong," "I've read every feminist book since Simone de Beauvoir, and I still do what I do and I am very, very good." "I like her." "I'm a courtesan!" "They said I need new clothes, and I need to do another language, and I need new photos, which I totally need your help with." "But I did it, Ben." "I'm in!" "OK." "Call me back." "Is that weird?" "Asking your ex-boyfriend to take photos of you in your underwear so rich strangers can decide whether they want to pay to have sex with you?" "That's right, isn't it?" "There's something I have to do first." "So I won't be sent to any more stag dos 'by mistake', and I won't be putting bits of sponge up myself during my period, and I won't be giving you 40 percent of anything." "I'm with Diamond International now." "It's been lovely, ladies." "Aren't you forgetting something?" " Last week?" " Yeah." "Hang on." "I'll give you a receipt." "Photographs have a huge impact on the sort of client you get." "The more expensive you are, the less flesh you flash." "Cleavage is good." "But no nipples." "Not at this level." "Pointing your toes is great if you wish your legs were longer." "But then... so are these." "The lean-back is a good one for hiding a tummy." "But if you're still not looking classy enough... go monochrome." "That actually looks professional." "Yeah, you scrub up OK." " Are you deleting them?" " Yeah." "Well, don't!" "They're nice." "I can't keep photos of you on my camera, Han." "She shouldn't be looking at your camera, Ben." "How's the house-hunting going?" "Yeah, it's good." "We're looking in St. Albans." "Very nice." "Actual...grown-up place..." "Well, you can't keep on renting after you're married." "What do you know about real life?" "You're going to be an uber-whore." "So..." "Am I the first patron of the new, all-improved Belle?" "Yes, you are, Mr. Rothman." "You deserve... to be treated... like this." "You deserve everything." "That's why I want you to have this apartment." "What?" "This is your apartment." "If you want it." " No." " Yeah." "No!" "Oh, my God!" "Let me see these stairs!" "I'm still working nights, but I get five people under me and a lot more money." "And the new place belongs to one of the partners?" "Yeah, from the LA office." "The lease on this place runs out next month, so..." "Are these yours?" "No, Mum, I stole them." "Look." "I used to read this to you." "I know." "Why don't you take it for Jackie?" "Well, don't you want it?" "I won't need it." "You should take it." "It'll be nice for the baby." "OK." "Hannah, I know you've always belonged to your dad." " Ohhh, Mum!" " No, I know that." "It's just I understand what Jackie's doing." "The same thing I did." "Your world I don't know at all." "What do you think, Dad?" "We're so proud of you." "I thought about getting you a cat." "But then I thought that's way too much responsibility." "Then I thought about getting you a fish." "But then I remembered that you find all fish..." " strangely depressing." " strangely depressing." "Yeah." "The man at the shop said that's the lowest maintenance you can get." " Ohhh!" "Thank you." " You're welcome." "Being at the top of my profession means I'm completely in charge." "I sift through the applicants, judging their spelling and grammar." "Some of those go on to a conversation." "And a small number of those I arrange to meet for a sort of mutual interview." "My name's Rupert." "It's a filtering process." "Some of them want a paid mistress, a holiday companion," " and others are after a female friend they can fuck." " Today or tomorrow..." "But they all want something more than sex." " I'll be in touch." " I'll be in touch." "Au revoir." " So, have you got yourself much of a list yet?" " I've got four now." " That's including?" " That's including yourself." "You want to watch that." "You don't want more than that." "The more guys a courtesan sees, the less prestigious she is." "I'll remember that." "Listen." "We're filming in Scotland next month." "I want you to come out and join me." " Really?" " Sure." "They've got me this..." "little place." "It'll be... charming." "Do you know what I found?" "I found that with the dinners, and the taxis and the ballet..." "dating cost me just the same." "And these were very nice women." "But...divorced and complicated, or crazy and young." "Well, you do tend to date actresses." "No." "I married actresses." "I dated waitresses." "What did you study?" "Politics and economics." " Really?" " No." "I changed to English when I saw the hours." "You could do so many things." "Mitchell, you're not trying to save me, are you?" "Hell no." "I live in the real world." "They need me on set." "I was saying I'm sorry I couldn't make it." "I had to come to Scotland." "Ben?" "Ben?" "Ben..." "Hello, look, the signal's shit." "You're demanding." "What the hell are you doing?" "Christ!" "What, you think that's cute?" "Great." "This is how it's gonna be, huh?" "I was just wondering if there was a time when all the women get together at all?" "Not that often." "I mean everyone's so busy and diffuse." "Of course, yeah, yeah..." "But you're doing well, though." "I heard you had one of Mitchell Rothman's places." "Did you?" "Has he got lots of places?" "Yes." "Unusual man." "He's got girls in places all over the world." "He's what we call a collector." "But..." "Mitchell's well, isn't he?" "Yeah... yeah, everything's fine." "OK." "Bye." "What is it?" "What's up?" "I'm so fucking bored and..." "lonely." "Jesus, Hannah, you call me over in the middle of the night because you're bored?" "Serpico's on." "I hate Serpico." "It's you that loves Serpico." "All right." "We won't see Serpico." "Vanessa, I won't be long." "Yeah." "Can we talk about that later?" "Do you want another cocktail or just a cup of tea, Ben?" "No, I understand, I understand..." "Well, thanks for that." "That's just fucking brilliant." " What?" " You knew exactly what you were doing." " What?" "I asked you what you wanted to drink." " Just..." "So she knows you're with me." "It's not like we're fucking, we're best mates." "I'm going to be your best man." "You know what?" "You are bored." "You are lonely..." "You never see any of your university friends, your family..." "You've lied about it all." "You've alienated everyone!" "For this..." "For all this shit." "Don't go." "Yeah, Vanessa wonders what I'm doing here at midnight." "Of course!" "Because she knows, Hannah!" "Shit, at our wedding, she's going to be sat there next to me in her dress." "And... you're going to get up and give your speech." "And every single person in the room's going to be thinking:" ""why isn't he marrying her?"" "Belle?" "I'm sorry, Mitch." "It's not for me." "B." "Do you like this font?" "Yeah, it's nice." " So what are you now?" " An independent escort." "Good." "I always thought "courtesan" sounded a bit silly." "I like short appointments, I like lots of clients." "Don't want to be a paid wife." "I can always be your security." "What?" "Not in a pimpy kind of way." "Seriously, though." "Wouldn't Vanessa mind me calling you with names and addresses and everything?" "Wouldn't that cause problems?" "I've called it off." "What?" "The wedding." "We're not getting married." "And I don't want to marry you." "I know." "When I realised that, I realised..." "I don't want to marry her either." "Hi, Mum." "You need to press it down really hard." "Yeah, Ben's here." "Hello, Mrs. B!" "She says do you want to come for Sunday lunch?" "Only if she does her lamb." "He said yes." "Can I come too, though?" "That's the thing..." "In London, you can keep secrets." "You can be anonymous, you can be whoever you want." "But as long as one person knows you entirely and loves you still... it's the best place in the world."