"Our pasta this evening is squid ravioli in a lemongrass broth with goat cheese profiteroles, and I also have an arugula caesar salad." "For entrées this evening, I have swordfish meatloafwith onion marmalade, rare-roasted partridge breast in raspberry coulis with a sorrel timbale..." "And grilled free-range rabbit with herbed French fries." "Our pasta tonight is a squid in a lemonrass broth and the fish tonight is grilled" "With a double espresso." "God, I hate this place." "It's a chicks' restaurant." "Why aren'twe at Dorsia?" "Because Bateman won't give the maitre d' head." "Is that Reed Robinson over there?" "Are you freebasing orwhat?" "That's not Robinson." " Well, who is it, then?" " It's Paul Allen." "That's not Paul Allen." "Paul Allen's on the other side of the room." " Overthere." " Who's he with?" "Some weasel from Kicker Peabody." "They don't have a good bathroom to do coke in." "Are you sure that's Paul Allen over there?" "Yes, McDufus, I am." "He's handling the Fisher account." "Lucky bastard." "Lucky Jew bastard." "Jesus, McDermott, what does that have to do with anything?" "I've seen that bastard sitting in his office, talking on the phone to the CEO, spinning a fucking menorah." "Not a menorah." "You spin a dreidel." "Oh, my God, Bateman." "Want me to fry you up some fucking potato pancakes?" "Some latkes?" "No, just cool itwith the anti-Semitic remarks." "Oh, I'd forgotten." "Bateman's dating someone from the ACLU." "He's the voice of reason." "The boy next door." "Speaking of reasonable." "Only $570." "Not bad." "A little something for the purse." "Give herthe 50." "Two Stolis on the rocks." "These aren't good anymore." "It's a cash bar." "That'll be $25." "You're a fucking ugly bitch." "I want to stab you to death, then play around with your blood." "What can I get for you two?" "I live in the American Gardens building on West 81st Street, on the 11th floor." "My name is Patrick Bateman." "I'm 27 years old." "I believe in taking care of myself and a balanced diet and a rigorous exercise routine." "In the morning, if my face is a little puffy," "I'll put on an ice pack while doing my stomach crunches." "I can do 1,000 now." "After I remove the ice pack, I use a deep-pore cleanser lotion." "In the shower, I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond body scrub, and on the face, an exfoliating gel scrub." "Then I apply an herb mint facial mask, which I leave on for 10 minutes, while I prepare the rest of my routine." "I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries yourface out and makes you look older." "Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion." "There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman, some kind of abstraction, but there is no real me, only an entity, something illusory." "And though I can hide my cold gaze and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable," "I simply am not there." "Morning, Hamilton." "Nice tan." " Late." " Aerobics class, sorry." "Any messages?" "Ricky Harrison has to cancel." "He didn't saywhat he was canceling orwhy." "I occasionally boxwith Ricky at the Harvard Club." "Anyone else?" "Spencerwants to meet for drinks at Flutie's Pier 17." " When?" " After 6.00." " Negative." "Cancel it." " And what should I say?" "Just say no." "Just say no?" "Okay, Jean, I need reservations forthree at Camols at 12:30, and if not there, try Crayons, all right?" "Yes, sir." "Oh, wait, and I need reservations fortwo atArcadia at 8:00 on Thursday." "Something romantic?" "No." "Silly." "Forget it, I'll make them." " No, I'll do it." " No, no." "Be a doll and just get me a mineral water, okay?" "You look nice today." "Don'twearthat outfit again." "What?" "I didn't hear you." "I said, do notwearthat outfit again." "Wear a dress, a skirt or something." "You don't like this, I take it?" "Come on, you're prettierthan that." "Thanks, Patrick." "I'm not here." "And high heels." "I like high heels." ""Feathered Friends" for 600." "During courtship, the male frigate bird inflates to enormous size the red pouch found here." "Thousands of roses, and lots of chocolate truffles, Godiva, and oysters on the half shell." "I'm trying to listen to the new Robert Palmertape, but Evelyn, my supposed fiancée, keeps buzzing in my ear." "Annie Leibovitz." "We'll getAnnie Leibovitz." "And we'll have to get someone to videotape." "Patrick, we should do it." " Do what?" " Get married." "Have a wedding." "No, I can't take the time offwork." "Yourfather practically owns the company." "You can do anything you like, silly." "I don'twant to talk about it." "You hate that job anyway." "I don't see why you just don't quit." "Because I want to fit in." "Williams party." "I'm on the verge oftears by the time we arrive at Espace, since I'm positive we won't have a decent table." "But we do, and reliefwashes over me in an awesome wave." "Patrick, this is my cousin Vanden and her boyfriend Stash." "They're both artists." " The menu's in Braille." " I see you've met everyone." "You look awesome." "Okay, okay, all right." "I'm fairly certain that Timothy Bryce and Evelyn are having an affair." "Timothy is the only interesting person I know." "I'm almost completely indifferent as to whether Evelyn knows I'm having an affair with Courtney Rawlinson, her closest friend." "Courtney is almost perfect-looking." "She's usually operating on one or more psychiatric drugs." "Tonight, I believe it's Xanax." "More disturbing than her drug use, though, is the fact that she's engaged to Luis Carruthers, the biggest dufus in the business." "Tell me, Stash, do you think SoHo is becoming too commercial?" "Yes, I read that." "Oh, who gives a rat's ass?" "Hey, that affects us." "What about the massacres in Sri Lanka, honey?" "Doesn't that affect us, too?" "Do you know anything about Sri Lanka?" "How, like, the Sikhs are, like, killing tons of Israelis over there?" "Come on, Bryce." "There are a lot more important problems than Sri Lanka to worry about." "Like what?" "Well, we have to end apartheid, for one, and slow down the nuclear arms race, stop terrorism, and world hunger." "We have to provide food and shelter for the homeless and oppose racial discrimination and promote civil rights while also promoting equal rights forwomen." "We have to encourage a return to traditional moral values." "Most importantly, we have to promote general social concern and less materialism in young people." "Patrick, how thought-provoking." "Hello." ""Bleach-ee"?" "Are you trying to say "bleach-ee"?" "Oh, my God." "Two things." "One, you can't bleach a Cerruti." "Out of the question." "Two, I can only get these sheets in Santa Fe." "These are very expensive sheets and I really need them clean." "If you don't shutyourfucking mouth," "I will kill you." "I have a lunch meeting at Hubert's in 20 minutes with Ronald Harrison and I need those sheets cleaned by this afternoon." "I cannot understand you!" "This is crazy." "You're a fool." "I can't cope with this." "Stupid "bitch-ee"!" "Understand?" "Christ." "Patrick?" "Hi, Patrick." "I thought thatwas you." "Hello..." "Isn't it ridiculous coming all the way up here?" "But they really are the best." "Then why can't they get these stains out?" "Can you talk to these people or something?" "I'm not getting anywhere." "Oh, what are those?" "Oh, well, it's cranberry juice." "Cran-apple." "Really?" "Listen, if you could talk to them, I would really appreciate it." "I'm really late." "I have a lunch appointment at Hubert's in 15 minutes." "Hubert's?" "That moved uptown, right?" "Well, boy, listen, I've gotta go." "Thank you, Victoria." "Maybe we could do lunch one day nextweek." "You know, I'm downtown..." " I don't know." "I'm atwork all the time." " What about a Saturday?" " Next Saturday?" " Sure." "Can't, I'm afraid." "I have a matinée of Les Mis." "I've really got to go." "Christ." "I'll call you." "Okay." "Do." "Listen, you're dating Luis." "He's in Arizona." "You're fucking me, and we haven't made plans." "What could you possibly be up to tonight?" "Stop it." "I'm..." "On a lot of lithium?" "Waiting for Luis to call me." "He said he'd call tonight." "Pumpkin." "Pumpkin, you're dating an asshole." "Pumpkin, you're dating the biggest dickweed in New York." "Pumpkin, you're dating a tumbling, tumbling dickweed." "Patrick, stop calling me pumpkin, okay?" "I have to go." "Courtney!" " Dinner." " I can't!" "I'm thinking Dorsia." "Dorsia's nice." "Wear something fabulous." "Dorsia." "Yes, I know it's a little late, but is it possible to reserve a table fortwo at 8:00 or 8:30, perhaps?" "A facial at Elizabeth Arden, which was really relaxing, and then to the Pottery Barn where I got this little silver muffin dish." "Is that Donald Trump's car?" "God, Patrick, shut up." "Courtney, you should take some more lithium or have a Diet Coke." "Some caffeine might getyou out of this slump." "I just want a child." "Just two perfect" "children." "Are we here?" "Yeah." "This is Dorsia?" " Good evening." " Yes, dear." "Courtney, you're gonna have the peanut butter soup with smoked duck and mashed squash." "New York Matinee called it" ""a playful, but mysterious little dish."" "You'll love it." "And then the red snapper with violets and pine nuts." "I think thatwill follow nicely." "Thanks, Patrick." "Patrick, thanks so much for looking after Courtney." "Dorsia, how impressive." "How on earth did you get a reservation there?" "Lucky, I guess." "That's a wonderful suit." "Don't tell me, don't tell me, let me guess." "Valentino Couture." "Uh-huh." "It looks so soft." "Your complimentwas sufficient, Luis." "Hello, Halberstram." "Nice tie." "How the hell are you?" "Allen has mistaken me forthis dickhead, Marcus Halberstram." "It seems logical, because Marcus also works at PP and, in fact, does the same exact thing I do." "He also has a penchant for Valentino suits and Oliver Peoples glasses." "Marcus and I even go to the same barber, although I have a slightly better haircut." "So how's the Ransom account going, Marcus?" " It's all right." " Really?" "That's interesting." "It's not..." "It's not great." "Oh, well, you know." "So how's Cecilia?" "She's a great girl." "Oh, yeah, I'm very lucky." "Congratulations on the Fisher account." "Thank you, Baxter." "Listen, Paul." "Squash?" "Call me." " How about Friday?" " No can do." "I got an 8:30 res at Dorsia." "Great sea urchin ceviche." "Dorsia on a Friday night?" "How'd he swing that?" "I think he's lying." "Is that a gram?" "New card." "What do you think?" "Whoa." "Very nice." "Look at that." "Picked them up from the printer's yesterday." " Good coloring." " That's bone." "And the lettering is something called Silian Rail." "It's very cool, Bateman." "But that's nothing." "Look at this." "That is really nice." "Eggshell with Romalian type." "What do you think?" "Nice." "Jesus." "That is really super." "How did a nitwit like you get so tasteful?" "I can't believe that Bryce prefers Van Patten's card to mine." "Butwait." "You ain't seen nothin' yet." "Raised lettering." "Pale Nimbus White." "Impressive." "Very nice." "Let's see Paul Allen's card." "Look at that subtle off-white coloring, the tasteful thickness of it." "Oh, my God." "It even has a watermark." "Is something wrong, Patrick?" "You're sweating." "Hello." "Pat Bateman." "You want some money?" "Some food?" " This what you need?" " I'm hungry." "Yeah." "Cold out, too, isn't it?" "Why don't you get a job?" "Ifyou're so hungry, why don't you get a job?" "I lost my job." "Why?" "You drinking?" "Is thatwhy you lost it?" "Insidertrading?" "Justjoking." "Listen, what's your name?" "Al." "Speak up." "Come on." " Al." " Get a goddamn job, Al." "You got a negative attitude." "That's what's stopping you." "You gotta get your act together." "I'll help you." "You are so kind, mister." "You're kind." "You're a kind man." " It's okay." " I can tell." "Please, you gotta tell me what to do." "You gotta help me." "I'm so cold." "I'm hungry." "You know how bad you smell?" "You reek of shit." "Do you know that?" "Al." "I'm sorry." "It's just that..." "I don't know." "I don't have anything in common with you." "Oh, thank you, mister." "Thank you." "I'm cold out here." " You know what a fucking loseryou are?" " What?" "What beautiful skin you have, Mr. Bateman." "So fine, so smooth." "I have all the characteristics of a human being, flesh, blood, skin, hair, but not a single clear identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust." "Something horrible is happening inside of me, and I don't know why." "My nightly blood lust has overflowed into my days." "I feel lethal, on the verge offrenzy." "I think my mask of sanity is about to slip." "Hey, MacLoy, what do you say?" "Hey, Hamilton, have a holly, jolly Christmas." "Is Allen still handling the Fisher account?" "Of course." "Who else?" "Mistletoe alert." "Merry Xmas, Patrick." " Merry Xmas, Harry." " Merry Christmas." " You're late, honey." " I'm not late." " Oh, yes, you are." " I've been here the entire time." "You just didn't see me." "Say hello to Snowball." "Snowball says "Merry Christmas, Patrick."" "What is it?" "It's a little baby piggy-wiggy, isn't it?" "It's a Vietnamese potbellied pig." "They make darling pets." "Don't you?" "Don't you?" "Stop scowling, Patrick." "You're such a Grinch." "What does Mr. Grinch want for Christmas?" "And don't say "breast implants" again." "Alan." "Marcus!" "Merry Christmas." "How you been?" "Workaholic, I suppose?" "I haven't seen you in a while." "Hey, Hamilton!" "We're going to Nell's." "Limo's out front." "We should have dinner." "Maybe you could bring..." " Cecilia?" " Yes, Cecilia!" "Oh, Cecilia would adore it." "Well, then let's do it, Marcus." " Great party." " Thanks." "Patrick, why is he calling you Marcus?" "Mistletoe alert." "Marcus Halberstram fortwo at 7.00." "No, I want to know." "I came here for the cilantro crawfish gumbo." "All right?" "Which is, after all, the only excuse one could have for being in this restaurant, which is, by the way, almost completely empty." " I'm very sorry, sir." " JB straight and a Corona." " Would you like to hear..." " Double Absolut martini." "Yes, sir." "Would you like to hearthe specials?" "Not if you want to keep your spleen." "This is a real beehive of activity, Halberstram." "This place is hot." "Very hot." "Listen, the mud soup and charcoal arugula are outrageous here." "Yeah, well, you're late." "Hey, I'm a child of divorce." "Give me a break." "I see they've omitted the pork loin with lime Jell-o." "We should've gone to Dorsia." "I could have gotten us a table." "Nobody goes there anymore." "Is that Ivana Trump?" "Oh, jeez, Patrick..." "I mean, Marcus, what are you thinking?" "Whywould Ivana be at Texarkana?" "So, wasn't Rothschild originally handling the Fisher account?" "How'd you get it?" "Well, I could tell you that, Halberstram, but then I'd have to kill you." "I like to dissect girls." "Did you know I'm utterly insane?" "Great tan, Marcus." "Really impressive." " Where do you tan?" " Salon." "I've got a tanning bed at home." "You should look into it." "And Cecilia..." "How is she?" "Where is she tonight?" "Cecilia is..." "Well, you know Cecilia." "I think she's having dinner with Evelyn Williams." "Evelyn!" "Great ass." "Goes outwith that loser Patrick Bateman." "What a dork." "Another martini, Paul?" "You like Huey Lewis and the News?" "They're okay." "Their earlywork was a little too newwave for my taste." "Butwhen Sports came out in '83," "I think they really came into their own, commercially and artistically." "The whole album has a clear, crisp sound and a new sheen of consummate professionalism that really gives the songs a big boost." "He's been compared to Elvis Costello, but I think Huey has a far more bitter, cynical sense of humor." " Hey, Halberstram." " Yes, Allen?" "Why are there copies of the Style section all over the place?" "Do you have a dog?" "A little chow or something?" "No, Allen." "Is that a raincoat?" "Yes, it is!" "In '87, Huey released this," "Fore!" ", their most accomplished album." "I think their undisputed masterpiece is Hip to be Square." "The song's so catchy." "Most people probably don't listen to the lyrics." "But they should because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity and the importance oftrends, it's also a personal statement about the band itself." "Hey, Paul?" "Try getting a reservation at Dorsia now, you fucking stupid bastard!" "You fucking bastard!" "'Cause I can tell what's going on" "It's hip to be square" "I like my bands in business suits" "I watch them on TV" "I'm working out 'most every day" "And watching what I eat" "They tell me that it's good for me" "But I don't even care" "I know that it's crazy" "I know that it's nowhere" "There is no denying that" "It's hip to be square" "He was completely naked and he was standing on one of the tables with everyone watching..." "Patrick?" "Patrick!" "Is thatyou?" "No, Luis, it's not me." "You're mistaken." "This is my very good friend, Patrick Bateman." "Where are you going?" "We're going to Nell's." "Gwendolyn's father is buying it." "Where did you get that overnight bag?" "Jean Paul Gaultier." "When I get to Paul Allen's place," "I use the keys I took from his pocket before disposing of the body." "There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul's apartment overlooks the park and it's obviously more expensive than mine." "I calm myself and move into the bedroom, where I find his suitcase and start to pack." "It's time for Paul to take a little trip." "Where to send the bastard?" "Dallas?" "Paris?" "Singapore?" "London." "I'll send the ass to London." "Hi, this is Paul." "I've been called away to London for a few days." "Meredith, I'll call you when I get back." "Hasta la vista, baby." "What is it?" "Patrick." "Yes, Jean?" "There's a Mr. Donald Kimball here to see you." "Who?" "Detective Donald Kimball." "Tell him I'm at lunch." "Patrick, it's only 10:30." "I think he knows you're here." "Send him in, I guess." "Now, John, you've gotta wear clothes in proportion to your physique." "There are definite dos and don'ts, good buddy, ofwearing a bold-striped shirt." "A bold-striped shirt calls for solid-colored or discretely patterned suits and ties." "Yes, always tip the stylist 15%." "Listen, John, I've got to go." "T. Boone Pickensjustwalked in." "Justjoking." "No, don't tip the owner of the salon." "Okay, John." "Right." "Got it." "Sorry about that." "No, I'm sorry." "I should've made an appointment." "Was that anything important?" "Oh, that?" "Just mulling over business problems, examining opportunities, exchanging rumors, spreading gossip." "Hi." "I'm Donald Kimball." "Hi, Pat Bateman." "Nice to meetyou." "Sorry to barge in on you like this." "I know how busy you guys can get." "So, what's the topic of discussion?" "I've been hired by Meredith Powell to investigate the disappearance of Paul Allen." "I see, yeah." "Paul's disappearance, yeah." "So it's nothing that official." "I just have some basic questions about Paul Allen." " Aboutyourself..." " Coffee?" "No, I'm okay." " Apollinaris?" " No, I'm okay." " Can you bring Mister..." " Kimball." "Mr. Kimball a bottle..." " No, really, I'm okay." " It's no problem." "So, what's the topic of discussion?" "The disappearance of Paul Allen." "Right." "Well, I haven't..." "I haven't heard anything about the disappearance or anything, not on Page Six at least." " I think his familywants this kept quiet." " Understandable." "Lime?" " No, really, I'm okay." " You sure?" "I can always getyou a lime." "Just some preliminary questions that I need for my own files, okay?" "Shoot." " How old are you?" " 27." " Where did you go to school?" " Harvard." " Then Harvard Business School." " Your address?" "The American Gardens building, West 81st Street." "Nice." "Very nice." "Thanks." " What can you tell me about Paul Allen?" " I'm at a loss." "He was part ofthatwhole Yale thing." " "Yale thing"?" " Yeah, Yale thing." "What do you mean, "Yale thing"?" "Well, I think for one that he was probably a closet homosexual who did a lot of cocaine." "That Yale thing." "What kind of man was he?" "Besides the information you'vejust given me." "I hope I'm not being cross-examined here." " Do you feel like that?" " No, not really." " Where did Paul hang out?" " Hang out?" "Yeah, you know, hang out." "Let me think." "The Newport." "Harry's." "Flutie's." "Indochine." "Nell's." "The Cornell Club." " The New York Yacht Club." " He had a yacht?" "No, hejust hung out there." "And where did he go to school?" " Don't you know this?" " I just wanted to know if you know." "Before Yale, if I remember correctly, Saint Paul's." "Listen, I just..." "I just want to help." "I understand." "Do you have anywitnesses orfingerprints?" "Well, there's a message on his answering machine that says he went to London." " Maybe he did, huh?" " His girlfriend doesn't think so." " But has anyone seen him in London?" " Actually, yes." "But I've had a hard time getting actual verification." "A Stephen Hughes said he saw him at a restaurant there." "But I checked it out, and what happened is he mistook a HerbertAinsworth for Paul, so..." "Had his apartment been burglarized?" "No, actually it hadn't." "Toiletries were missing, a suitwas gone, so was some luggage, that's it." "I mean, no one's dealing with the homicide squad yet, or anything, right?" "No, notyet." "As I said, we're not sure." "Basically, no one's seen or heard anything." " So typical, isn't it?" " It's just strange." "One day someone's walking around, going to work, alive, and then..." "Nothing." "Peoplejust disappear." "The earth just opens up and swallows them." "Eerie." "Really eerie." "Listen, you'll have to excuse me." "I have a lunch meeting with Cliff Huxtable at the Four Seasons in 20 minutes." "The Four Seasons?" "Isn't that a little far uptown?" "I mean, aren't you gonna be late?" "No, there's one down here." " Oh, really?" "I didn't know that." " It's very good." "Listen, if anything else occurs to you, any information..." "Absolutely." "I'm 100% with you." "Great, and thanks foryourtime, Mr. Bateman." " Bye-bye." " Goodbye." "I haven't seen you around here." "You just haven't been looking." "Would you like to see my apartment?" "I'm not supposed to." "Do you want to come to my apartment or not?" "I'm not supposed to, but I can make an exception." "Would you take a credit card?" "I'm joking." "Come on, get in." "I'd like a girl, early twenties, blonde, who does couples." "Couples." "And I really can't stress "blonde" enough." "Blonde." "I'm Paul." "My name's Paul Allen." "You got that?" "You're Christie." "You're to respond only to Christie." "Is that clear?" "That's a very fine chardonnay you're drinking." "I want you to clean your vagina." "No." "From behind." "Get on your knees." "You have a very nice body." "Thank you." "Send her up." "Christie, get out and dry off, choose a robe, not the Bijan, and come and meet me and our guest in the living room for drinks." "You've arrived!" "How lovely." "Let me take your coat." "I'm Paul." "How good of you to come." "Not quite blonde, are you?" "More dirty blonde." "I'm gonna call you Sabrina." "I'm Paul Allen." "So, don't you want to know what I do?" "No." "No, not really." "Well, I work on Wall Street at Pierce  Pierce." "Have you heard of it?" "You have a really nice place here, Paul." "How much did you pay for it?" "Well, actually, that's none of your business, Christie." "But I can assure you, it certainlywasn't cheap." "No." "No smoking." "Not in here." "Varda truffle?" "I don'twantyou to get drunk, but that's a very fine chardonnay you're not drinking." "Do you like Phil Collins?" "I've been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke." "Before that," "I really didn't understand any oftheirwork." "Itwas too artsy." "Too intellectual." "Itwas on Dukewhere" "Phil Collins' presence became more apparent." "I think Invisible Touch is the group's undisputed masterpiece." "It's an epic meditation on intangibility." "At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums." "Christie, take off the robe." "Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins, and Rutherford." "You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument." "Sabrina, remove your dress." "In terms of lyrical craftsmanship and sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism." "Sabrina, why don't you dance a little?" "Take the lyrics to "Land of Confusion."" "In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority." "In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment." "The song is extremely uplifting." "Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I've heard in rock." "Christie, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole." "Phil Collins' solo career seems to be more commercial, and therefore more satisfying in a narrowerway." "Especially songs like In The Air Tonight and Against All Odds." "Sabrina, don't just stare at it." "Eat it." "But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group than as a solo artist." "And I stress the word "artist."" "This is Sussudio." "A great, great song." "A personal favorite." "Look at the camera." "Christie, look at the camera." "Don't touch the watch." "Can we go now?" "We're not through yet." "If they have a good personality and they're not great-looking, then who fucking cares?" "Just say, hypothetically, okay, what ifthey have a good personality?" "I know, I know." "There are no girls with good personalities." "A good personality consists of a chick with a little hard body who'll satisfy all sexual demands without being too slutty about things and who will essentially keep her dumb fucking mouth shut." "The only girls with good personalities who are smart, or maybe funny or halfway intelligent ortalented, though God knows what the fuck that means, are ugly chicks." "Absolutely." "And this is because they have to make up for how fucking unattractive they are." "You know what Ed Gein said aboutwomen?" "Ed Gein?" "Maitre d' at Canal Bar?" "No." "Serial killer." "Wisconsin, in the '50s." "What did Ed say?" ""When I see a pretty girl walking down the street," ""I think two things." "One part of me wants to take her out and talk to her," ""be real nice and sweet and treat her right."" "And what did the other part of him think?" "What her head would look like on a stick." "Hi, guys." "I want to get your opinion on something." "It's my business card." "I decided to get a new one, too." "Oh, that's..." "Very nice, Luis." "Thank you." "Listen, what about dinner?" "Is that all you ever have to contribute?" ""What about fucking dinner?"" "Cheer up there, Bateman." "What's the matter, no shiatsu this morning?" "Keep touching me like that, and you'll draw back a stump." " Hold on there, little buddy." " Excuse me." "God." "Patrick." "Why here?" "I've seen you looking at me." "I've noticed your hot body." "Don't be shy." "You can't imagine how long I've wanted this, ever since that Christmas party atArizona 206." "You were wearing that red-striped paisley Armani tie." "I want you." "I want you, too." " Patrick." " What is it?" "Where are you going?" "I've gotta return some videotapes." "Okay, Monday?" "The 20th." "Monday?" "That's..." " Any Paul Allen?" " Reservation, no." "No reservation, but..." "Kimball." "I've been wanting to talk with you." "Come into my office." "Jean, greatjacket." "Matsuda?" "Do you rememberwhere you were the night of Paul's disappearance, which was on the 20th of December?" "God." "I guess I was probably returning videotapes." "I had a date with a girl named Veronica." " That's notwhat I've got." " What?" "That's not the information I've received." "Well, wait." "What information have you received?" "Let me see." " You were with..." " Well, I could be wrong." "When was the last time you were with Paul Allen?" "We'd gone to a new musical called..." "O Africa, Brave Africa." "Itwas a laugh riot." "Thatwas about it." "I think we had dinner at Orso's." "No, Petal..." "No, Orso's." "I hope I've been informative." "Long day." "Bit scattered." "I'm a little spent now, too." "But how about lunch in a week or so, when I've sorted out all this information?" "Great." "Yes, I'd like that." "And if you could try and pin down where you were the night of Paul Allen's disappearance, itwould make my job a lot easier." "Absolutely." "I'm with you on that one." "Huey Lewis and the News." "Great stuff." "I just bought it on myway here." "You heard it?" "Never." "I mean, I don't really like singers." " Not a big music fan, huh?" " No, I like music." "Just they're..." "Huey's too black-sounding for me." "To each his own." "So, lunch nextweek?" "I'll be there." "Will you call me before Easter?" "Maybe." "What are you doing tonight?" "Dinner at River Café." "Au Bar afterwards, maybe." "That's nice." "I never knew you smoked." "You never noticed." "Listen, Patrick, can we talk?" "You look marvelous." "There's nothing to say." "You're gonna marry Luis." "Isn't that special?" "Patrick?" "Yes, Courtney?" "If I don't see you before Easter, have a nice one, okay?" "You, too." "Patrick?" "Yeah?" "Nothing." "There's this theory now that if you can catch the AIDS virus through having sexwith someone, then you can catch anything." "Alzheimer's, muscular dystrophy, hemophilia, leukemia, diabetes, dyslexia." "I'm not sure, but I don't think dyslexia's a virus." "Who knows?" "They don't know that." "Prove it." " Oh, God!" " What?" "It's a fucking milligram of sweetener." "I wanna get high off this, not sprinkle it on my fucking oatmeal." "It's definitelyweak, but I have a feeling if we do enough of it, we'll be okay." "Can you keep it down?" "I'm trying to do drugs!" " Fuck you!" " Calm down." "Do it anyway." "That's right." "That is, if the faggot in the next stall thinks it's okay!" " Fuck you!" " Hey, fuck you!" "Sorry, dude." "The steroids." "Okay, let's do it." "Where did Craig go?" "Well, Gorbachev is downstairs." "McDermottwent to sign a peace treaty between the United States and Russia." "He's the one behind Glasnost." "He said he was in mergers and acquisitions." "You're not confused, are you?" "No, not really." "Gorbachev is not downstairs." "Caron's right." "Gorbachev's not downstairs." "He's at Tunnel." "Ask me a question." "So, what do you do?" "I'm into murders and executions, mostly." " Do you like it?" " Well, it depends." "Why?" "Well, most guys I know who work in mergers and acquisitions really don't like it." "So, where do you work out?" " You think I'm dumb, don't you?" " What?" "You think I'm dumb." "You think all models are dumb." "No." "I really don't." "That's okay." "I don't mind." "There's something sweet about you." "Doing the crossword?" "You need any help?" "Jean?" "Yes, Patrick?" "Would you like to accompany me to dinner?" "That is, ifyou're not doing anything." "No." "No, I don't have any plans." "Well." "Isn't this a coincidence?" " Listen, where should we go?" " Anywhere you want." "Let's not think aboutwhat I want." "How about anywhere you want?" "I don't know, Patrick." "I can't make this decision." "Come on." "Where do you want to go?" "Anywhere you want." "Just say it." "I can get us in anywhere." "What about" "Dorsia?" "So," "Dorsia is where Jean wants to go." "I don't know." "No, we'll go whereveryou want to go." "Dorsia is fine." "Dorsia." "Yes?" "Yeah, can you take two tonight at, well, let's say 9:00?" " We're totally booked." " Really?" "That's great." " No, I said we are totally booked." " Two at 9:00?" "Perfect." "See you then." "Yeah." "You're dressed okay." "You didn't give a name." "They know me." "Why don't you meet me at my place at 7:00, for drinks." "And, Jean?" "You'll want to change before we go out." "Patrick, it's so elegant." "What a wonderful view." "Jean?" "Sorbet?" "Thanks, Patrick." "I'd love some." "Do you want a bite?" "I'm on a diet." "But thank you." "You don't need to lose anyweight." "You're kidding, right?" "You look great." "Very fit." "You can always be thinner, look better." "Well, maybe we shouldn't go out to dinner." "I don'twant to ruin yourwillpower." "No, it's all right." "I'm not very good at controlling it anyway." "So, listen, what do you reallywant to do with your life?" "Just briefly." "Summarize." "And don't tell me you enjoy working with children, okay?" "Well, I'd like to travel and maybe go back to school, but I don't really know." "I'm at a point in my life where there seems to be so many possibilities." "But I don't know." "I'm just so unsure." "Do you have a boyfriend?" "No, not really." "Interesting." "Are you seeing anyone?" "I mean, seriously?" "Maybe." "I don't know." "Not really." "Jean, do you feel fulfilled?" "I mean, in your life?" "I guess I do." "For a long time, I was too focused on mywork." "But now I've really begun to think about changing myself." "You know, developing and growing." "Growing." "I'm glad you said that." "Did you know that Ted Bundy's first dog, a collie, was named Lassie?" " Had you heard this?" " Who's Ted Bundy?" "Forget it." "What's that?" "Duct tape." "I need it for taping something." "Patrick?" "Have you everwanted to make someone happy?" "What?" "No!" "Put it in the carton!" "Sorry." "Jean?" "What?" "Make someone happy." "Have you everwanted to?" "I'm looking for..." "I guess you could say I just want to have a meaningful relationship with someone special." "Patrick." "Patrick." "I know you're there." "Pick up the phone, you bad boy." "What are you up to tonight?" "It's me." "Don't try to hide." "I hope you're not out with some little numberyou picked up, because you're mine, Mr. Bateman." "My boy next door." "Anyway, you never called me, and you said you would." "And I'll leave a message for Jean about this, too, to remind you, but we're having dinner with Melania and Taylor." "You know Melania." "She went to Sweet Briar." "And we're meeting at the Cornell Club, so I'll call you tomorrow morning, honey." "Oh." "Sorry." "I know you hate that." "Bye, Patrick." "Bye, Mr. Big-time CEO." "Bye-bye." "Was that Evelyn?" "Are you still seeing her?" "I'm sorry." "I have no right to ask that." "Do you want me to go?" "Yeah." "I don't think I can control myself." "I know." "I should go." "I know I have a tendency to get involved with unavailable men." "I mean, do you want me to go?" "I think if you stay, something bad will happen." "I think I might hurt you." "You don'twant to get hurt, do you?" "No." "No, I guess not." "I don'twant to get bruised." "You're right." "I should go." "Oh." "Don't forgetyou have a lunch date tomorrow with Donald Kimball at Smith and Wollensky." "Thanks." "It slipped my mind completely." "So, the night he disappeared, any new thoughts aboutwhatyou did?" "Not sure." "I had a shower and some sorbet." "I think you're getting your dates mixed up." "Well, where do you place Paul that night?" "According to his date book, and this was verified by his secretary, he had dinnerwith Marcus Halberstram." " And?" " I questioned him." "Marcus." "Yes, and he denies it." "Though, at first, he couldn't be sure." " But he denied it?" " Yes." "Well, does Marcus have an alibi?" "Yes." " He does?" "You're sure?" " I've checked it out." "It's clean." "Now, where were you?" "Where was Marcus?" "He wasn'twith Paul Allen." "Who was he with?" "He was atAtlantis with Craig McDermott, Frederick Dibble," "Harry Newman, George Butner, and you." "Oh, right, yeah." "Of course." "He had wanted Paul Allen to come, but he had made plans, and I guess I had dinner with Victoria the following night." "Personally, I think the guy went a little nutso, split town for a while." "Maybe he did go to London, sightseeing, drinking, whatever." "Anyway, I'm pretty sure he'll turn up sooner or later." "I mean, to think that one of his friends killed him for no reason whatsoever would be too ridiculous." "Isn't that right, Patrick?" "Christie." "Christie!" "I'm not so sure about this." "I had to go to Emergency after last time." "This won't be anything like last time." "I promise." "I don't think so." "Just come in the limo and talk to me for a minute." "The driver's here." "You're safe." "Nothing like last time." "I promise." "All right." "So, you're looking great." "How've you been?" "Well, I actually might need a little surgery after last time." " Really?" " My friend told me I should get a lawyer." "Lawyers are so complicated." "Don't do that." "Here's a check." "Uh-uh." "Half now, half later." "Okay." "Your name's Christie." "We're meeting a friend of mine, Elizabeth." "She'll bejoining us in my new apartment shortly." "You'll like her." "She's a very nice girl." "You look really familiar." "Did you go to Dalton?" "I think I metyou at the Surf Bar, didn't I?" "With Spicey?" "Maybe notwith Spicey, but definitely at Surf Bar." "You know, Surf Bar?" "Anyway, Surf Bar sucks now." "It's terrible." "Went to a birthday party there for Malcolm Forbes." "Oh, my God, please." "This is nicerthan your other apartment." "Well, it's not that nice." "Where did you two meet?" "Oh, God." "We met at..." "Oh, God, at the Kentucky Derby in '85 or '86." "You were hanging out with that bimbo Allison Poole." "Hot number." "What do you mean?" "She was a hot number." "If you had a platinum card, she'd give you a blow job." "This girl worked at a tanning salon." "Need I say more?" "What do you do?" "She's my cousin." "She's from" "France." "Where's your phone?" "I've gotta call Harley." "Where do you summer?" "Southampton?" "No." " Oh, God." "It's his machine." " Elizabeth, it's 3.00 in the morning." "He's a goddamn drug dealer." "These are his peak hours." " Don't tell him you're here." " Whywould I?" "This tastes weird." "Harley, it's me." "I need your services." "Translate that howeveryou want." "I'm at..." " You're at Paul Allen's." " Who?" " Paul Allen." " I want the number, idiot." "Anyway, I'm at Paul Normand's, and I'll try you again later." "If I don't see you at Canal Bartomorrow night, I'm gonna sic my hairdresser on you." "Did you know that guywho disappeared?" "Didn't he work at Pierce  Pierce?" " Was he a friend ofyours?" " No." "Do you have any coke?" "Or Halcion?" "Oh, I would take a Halcion." "Listen." "I would just like to see the two of you get it on." "What's wrong with that?" "It's totally disease-free." " Patrick, you're a lunatic." " Come on." "Don't you find Christie attractive?" "Let's not get lewd." "I'm in no mood for a lewd conversation." "Come on." "I think it'd be a turn-on." "Does he do this all the time?" "Christie, you're not drinking yourwine." "You're telling me you've never gotten it on with a girl?" "No." "I'm not a lesbian." "Whywould you think I would be into that?" "Well, you went to Sarah Lawrence, for one thing." "Those are Sarah Lawrence guys, Patrick." "You're making me feel weird." "Did you know that Whitney Houston's debut LP, called simply Whitney Houston, had four number-one singles on it?" "Did you know that, Christie?" "You actually listen to Whitney Houston?" "You own a Whitney Houston CD?" "More than one?" "It's hard to choose a favorite among so many great tracks, butthe Greatest Love of All is one of the best, most powerful songs everwritten about self-preservation, dignity." "Its universal message crosses all boundaries and instills one with the hope that it's not too late to better ourselves." "Since, Elizabeth, it's impossible in this world we live in to empathize with others, we can always empathize with ourselves." "It's an important message." "Crucial, really." "And it's beautifully stated on the album." "Not the face, you bitch!" "Not the fucking face, you piece of bitch trash!" "I want a firm commitment." "I think, Evelyn, thatwe've lost touch." "Why?" "What's wrong?" "My need to engage in homicidal behavior on a massive scale cannot be corrected, but I have no otherway to fulfill my needs." " We need to talk." " Talk aboutwhat, Patrick?" "It's over, Evelyn." "It's all over." "Touchy, touchy." "I'm sorry I brought up the wedding." "Let's just avoid the issue, all right?" "Now, are we having coffee?" "I'm fucking serious." "It's fucking over." "Us." "This is nojoke." "I don't think we should see each other anymore." "Butyourfriends are my friends, and my friends are yourfriends." "I really don't think itwould work." "You have a little something..." "I know thatyourfriends are my friends, and I've thought about that." "You can have them." " You're really serious, aren't you?" " Yes, I am." "What about the past?" "Our past?" "We never really shared one." " You're inhuman." " No." "I'm in touch with humanity." "Evelyn, I'm sorry." "I just..." "You're not terribly important to me." "Oh, no!" "No!" "No!" "I know my behavior can be erratic sometimes." "What do you want me to do?" "What is it thatyou want?" "If you reallywant to do something for me, then stop making this scene right now." " Oh, God, I can't believe this." " I'm leaving." "I've assessed the situation, and I'm going." " Where are you going?" " Just leaving." "Butwhere?" "I have to return some videotapes." "Here, kitty, kitty." "Oh, my God." "What are you doing?" "Stop that." "Drop the weapon!" "Drop it now!" "Get on the ground!" "Put..." "Burning the midnight oil, Mr. Smith?" "Hey, now don't forget to sign in." "Hi." "Harold, it's Bateman." "Patrick Bateman." "You're my lawyer, so I think you should know, I've killed a lot of people." "Some escort girls in an apartment uptown, some homeless people, maybe five orten, an NYU girl I met in Central Park," "I left her in a parking lot behind some doughnut shop." "I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man..." "Some old faggotwith a dog." "Lastweek, I..." "I killed another girl with a chain saw." "I had to." "She almost got away." "Someone else there." "I can't remember." "Maybe a model." "But she's dead, too." "And Paul Allen." "I killed Paul Allen with an ax in the face." "His body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen." "I don'twant to leave anything out here." "I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40." "I have tapes of a lot of it." "Some of the girls have seen the tapes." "I even..." "I ate some of their brains." "And I tried to cook a little." "Tonight, I..." "I just had to kill a lot of people, and" "I'm not sure I'm gonna get awaywith it this time." "So I mean..." "I guess" "I'm a pretty..." "I mean, I guess I'm a pretty sick guy." "So, if you get back tomorrow," "I may show up at Harry's Bar." "So, you know." "Keep your eyes open." "Are you my 2:00?" "No." "Can I help you?" "I'm looking for Paul Allen's place." "Doesn't he live here?" "No, he doesn't." "You sure?" "You saw the ad in the Times?" "No." "Yeah." "I mean, yeah." " In the Times." " There was no ad in the Times." "I think you should go now." "But I think..." "I want to know what happened here." "Don't make any trouble, please." "I suggestyou go." "Don't come back." "I won't." "Don'tworry." "Patrick Bateman's office." " Jean?" "I need help." " Patrick, is thatyou?" "Jean, I'm not..." "Craig McDermott called." "He wants to meetyou," "David Van Patten, and Tim Bryce at Harry's for drinks." "Oh, God." "What did you say, you dumb bitch?" " Patrick, I can't hear you." " What am I doing?" "Where are you, Patrick?" "What's wrong?" "I don't think I'm gonna make it, Jean, to the office this afternoon." "Why?" "Just say no!" "What is it, Patrick?" "Are you all right?" "Stop sounding so fucking sad!" "Jesus!" "Table forthree." "Bateman, you look a little wild-eyed." "Rough day at the office?" "Look, Bryce is back, and he's drinking mineral water." "He's a changed man, except he still can't get a reservation to save his life." "Why don't you just try 150 Wooster?" "I'm not going anywhere unless we have a reservation." "Le Cirque, Flamingo East, Oyster Bar." "Come on, faggots, let's get a res." "Keep your shirt on." "Maybe lose the suspenders." "Need a reservation for 8:30." "Excuse me, gentlemen." "Right back." "10:00 would not be any good, no." "Just fucking call them." " Give me the phone." "I'll do it." " I'll call you back." "Face it." "The Japanese will own most of this country by the end of the '90s." "Shut up, Carnes." "Theywill not." "So, Harold, did you get my message?" "Jesus, yes!" "Thatwas hilarious." " Thatwas you, wasn't it?" " Yeah, naturally." "Bateman killing Allen and the escort girls." "That's fabulous." " That's rich." " What exactly do you mean?" "The message you left." "By the way, Davis, how's Cynthia?" " You're still seeing her, right?" " Wait, Harold." "What do you mean?" "Excuse me." "Nothing." "It's good to see you." "Is that Edward Towers?" "Wait." "Davis." "I'm not one to bad-mouth anyone." "Yourjoke was amusing, but come on, man." "You had one fatal flaw." "Bateman is such a dork." "Such a boring, spineless lightweight." "Now if you said Bryce or McDermott..." "Otherwise, itwas amusing." "Now ifyou'll excuse me, I really must be going." "Wait." "Stop." "I did it, Carnes." "I killed him." "I'm Patrick Bateman." "I chopped Allen's fucking head off." "The whole message I left on your machine was true." "Excuse me." "I really must be going now." "No, listen." "Don't you knowwho I am?" "I'm not Davis." "I'm Patrick Bateman." "We talk on the phone all the time." "Don't you recognize me?" "You're my lawyer." "Now, Carnes, listen." "Listen very, very carefully." "I killed Paul Allen, and I liked it." "I can't make myself any clearer." "But that's simply not possible." "And I don't find this funny anymore." "It neverwas supposed to be." " Why isn't it possible?" " It's just not." "Why not, you stupid bastard?" "Because I had dinnerwith Paul Allen twice in London, just 10 days ago." "No, you didn't." "Now, ifyou'll excuse me." "We've seen the results of that mistrust in the form of lies, divisions, and mistakes." "We need to find a way to cooperate while realizing foreign policy can't be run by committee." "And I believe there's now the growing sense that we can accomplish more by cooperating." "And, in the end, this may be the eventual blessing in disguise to come out of the Iran-Contra mess." "How can he lie like that?" " How can he pull that shit?" " What shit?" "Nowwhere do we have reservations at?" "I'm not really hungry, but I'd like to have reservations someplace." "How can you be so fucking..." "I don't know..." "Cool about it?" "Some guys are just born cool, I guess." "Bateman?" "What are you so fucking zany about?" "I'm just a happy camper." "Rockin' and a-rollin'!" "Oh, brother!" "Look." "He presents himself as this harmless old codger, but inside..." "But inside..." "But inside doesn't matter." "Inside?" "Yes?" "Inside?" "Believe it or not, Bryce, we're actually listening to you." "Come on, Bateman, what do you think?" "Whatever." "Whose moronic idea was it to order dry beers?" "I need a scotch." "When I named him to the U.S. Court of Appeals, the American Bar Association..." "There are no more barriers to cross." "All I have in common with the uncontrollable and the insane, the vicious and the evil, all the mayhem I have caused and my utter indifference toward it," "I have now surpassed." "My pain is constant and sharp, and I do not hope for a betterworld for anyone." "In fact, I want my pain to be inflicted on others." "I want no one to escape." "But even after admitting this, there is no catharsis." "My punishment continues to elude me, and I gain no deeper knowledge of myself." "No new knowledge can be extracted from my telling." "This confession has meant nothing."