"I'm not a bad person." "I want you to know that." "I'll tell you the story just as I remember it." "I was in the 8th grade." "Check this one out." "What do you think?" "She's super horny." "What am I supposed to do with this?" "Keep it." "How was school?" "Get into any trouble?" "Not really." "You should." "Only the troublemakers get remembered." "What's in your bag?" "Nothing." "Dad, when did you start going out with girls?" "Look, I'm not really the one to ask." "Want to shit on people?" "Sure." "I'm okay!" "I'm okay!" "Did my fall make you nervous?" "Sometimes, you fall." "Food's ready." "Hey, pull my feather." "Go on, pull." "I don't know what happened." "It just started." "Lift your head." "Open your beak." "Take your shirt off." "That's your father's body, and that's yours." "As we know, the bird's center of mass is located in the lower stomach, a little below the intestines." "Over time it's been proven that there's a symbiotic relationship between the fluids emitted by the brain during puberty and changes in gravity, global influences and everything else that enables bird flight in winter." "What does that mean?" "That if you keep masturbating, your father will die." "What does that story of Eden teach us?" "Raise your hands, please." "Michal?" "That Eve couldn't resist temptation." "Exactly." "Eve didn't resist temptation." "Anyone else?" "Enough!" "Just stop it, okay?" "Have you had enough?" "I'll save you." "Good morning, doofus!" "Good morning, Dad." "There's great visibility today." "You can see all the way to the coast." "Help me down." "Thanks." "Your shirt." "Thanks." "That's how it happened." "That's how I remember it happening, anyway." "I'm not a bad person." "I want you to know that." "I'm sorry, Dad." "I love you."