"El Gato!" "*THE ADVENTURES OF PUSS IN BOOTS* Season 05 Episode 03 Title:" "Caballo sin Cabeza"" "That was 61." "Yay!" " Puss in Boots!" " Fellow San Lorenzans." "Your attention, please." "It is I, Eames." "I've prepared some reflections on the state of our fair city." "Puss in Boots!" "Puss in Boots!" "Puss in Boots!" "Puss in Boots!" "As I was saying, I've been doing some nap testing, and, uh..." "Um..." "First item, our fountain." "And how loud it is." "Why, during my morning nap today..." "Whoops." "Excuse you." "Furthermore..." "Fellow San Lorenzans." "Your attention, please." "Um, pardon me, Puss, but I was..." "As you know, a portal to the Netherworld has opened up in San Lorenzo." "The portal's presence in town poses a challenge for the town's protector." "Which is exactly how I like it." "Let it be known that I'll defeat whatever monster emerges from vile caldera." "And after I do, there will be feasting and dancing." "And the dancing will look like this!" "Yeah, that's really impressive, Puss." "So, right, our fountain is too loud." "Next item, our beloved orphans... are also too loud." "Um..." "Oh, no one ever pays attention to me." "I'm a nobody." "Unless someone disagrees?" "Whoops!" "Didn't see you there... um... uh..." "Eames." "No, that's not it." "He found possums living under his house." " I don't wanna have cheese." " That's what I said." "Oh, crud." "It stinks being me." "When will I get recognized as the potentially-heroic-depending- on-the-circumstances fella that I know myself to be?" "Huh?" "Did you know that "papier-mâché" is French for "chewed paper"?" "The French have some weird customs." "Now I'm thirsty." "Pass the glue?" "Don't worry, Wimblegurp." "We're gonna make you lots of animal friends." "Hmm?" "Hey, Wimblegurp, where ya going?" "What is it?" "Children, this way." "Hurry, inside." "Come on." "Come on." "Come on." "Esme!" "Dulcinea, what's wrong?" "In the square." "It's a..." "Oh, no." "It's... the Caballo Sin Cabeza." "Did you know that just means "horse with no head"?" "Yes, but the Caballo Sin Cabeza isn't just any headless horse." "Long ago, it pulled the magical flying chariot of a powerful wizard who lived in a castle in the sky." "One day, it fell asleep under a tree." "How was there a tree in the sky?" "Oh, you're fine with a castle n the sky, but not a tree?" "Anyway, the horse overslept, making the wizard miss a speaking engagement at an important wizards conference." "The wizard was furious, so she banished it to the Netherworld... without its head." "The Caballo Sin Cabeza is doomed to spend its days galloping around until it finds a head it likes." "Ugh!" "Señora Zapata!" "Huh?" "What is happening?" "What the..." " Whoa." " Somebody help!" "Whoa!" "Back." "Whoa, señora!" "Do not talk to me like I am a horse." "I have no control over this beast." "Do something." "Do I attack?" "Or will hurting the horse hurt you?" "How should I know?" "I thought you were the hero." "I am the hero." "The very confused and not-sure-what-to-do hero." "Puss, you've got to come see this." "Now what trouble is afoot?" "I will be right back." "This, I swear." "You are useless, Puss in the Boots!" "There's no pleasing that horse-woman." "I know, right?" "Sort of horrifying, but tasteful at the same time." "This does not in any way make sense, but Señora Zapata has exchanged bodies with a horse." "Uh, no." "A headless horse emerged from the portal to the Netherworld and stole Señora Zapata's head by blowing magical dust onto her." "Of course, this makes more sense." "Once again, I am unsure what to do." "Do I attack?" "Do I not attack?" "Why could not the next monster to emerge from the portal have been something I could fight-stab?" "Ha-ha!" "Once again, I have saved the day." "Señora Zapata, are you all right?" "Say something." "So tired." "Have to regain strength." "So I can... yell at..." "Puss!" "Clearly, she's on the road to recovery." "Ay!" "I do not like this." "It is terrifying enough being attached to my own body." "It would appear that this horse is going around stealing people's heads almost as though it is looking for one it likes." "Uh, yeah." "If only someone had already mentioned that." "Someone over in this area, maybe." "Clearly, someone must tame this wild stallion." "Fortunately, I am the greatest tamer of horses in all the land." "It will take me no time to get inside that headless horse's head." "You know what I mean." "Puss." "Please, help me!" "Fear not, Mayor Temeroso." "The first step in taming a horse is to teach it to obey verbal commands." "Trot, horse." "Trot." "No, no." "Do not make him trot." "I am afraid to trot." "Caballo, I said trot." "That is not a trot." "That is a gallop." "I am also afraid to gallop!" "Dulcinea." "It got your head?" "I'm trying very hard to stay positive." "Do not fear, Dulcinea." "I shall break this wild stallion by riding it." "And a-one, two, three." "Uh... ♪♪ Romantic guitar playing... ♪♪" "Huh?" "Wait!" "Ha!" "Ow." "Make it a double, Pajuna." "When you have a moment." "Puss, what are you doing?" "That horse is still out there stealing heads." "Did you know that I don't like this?" "I will break this horse." "I just need a better plan." "Here, cat." "We made you a horse head." "That is hideous." "I mean, very good job." "Why did you do this?" "Uh, remember Wimblegurp?" "We made a costume when he came to town." "And it worked out great." "Do you not remember that your costume caused great deal of trouble?" "We decided that that didn't happen." "Uh-huh." "Well, thank you for the lovely artwork." "But what we need now is a plan to stop the caballo." "Does anyone have any ideas?" "Anybody?" "Say, I have an idea." "Come on, anything at all?" "There are no bad ideas." "Come on, pitch to me, people." "Pitch, pitch." "Huh?" "Did you know you are about to get your head taken?" "Um, Puss?" "I'm a monster!" "Oh, no, Puss." "Now it has..." "Uh..." "Right, right, you know, that guy..." "Um..." "Eric?" "Eli?" "Ebenezer?" "Oh, oh!" "Wait, no, Eames." "Eames." "Right." "I think he is new in town." "No, no, no, no..." "Whoa!" "How do you control this thing?" "Children, make way for Eames!" "Look out!" "It is Eames." "Everyone, pay attention to Eames so that he doesn't trample you to death." "Wait a second." ""Everyone pay attention to Eames"?" "So that he doesn't trample you to death." "Pay attention to Eames." "Pay attention to Eames." "Everyone!" "Pay attention to Eames!" "Yeah." "I like this." "♪ The stallion they couldn't tame No, they won't forget his name ♪" "♪ It's a sight to haunt your dreams A body of a horse and the face of Eames ♪" "♪ Whoa, look out, it's Horsey Eames ♪" "♪ Horsey Eames, yahoo Horsey Eames, yahoo ♪" "♪ The scariest horse you've ever seen Yahoo ♪" "♪ Horsey Eames ♪" "All right, Eames." "Let me once again try to tame this horse, so that it will return your head to you." "But why?" "I don't want to stop being a horse." "Nobody ever paid attention to me before." "Now, everywhere I go, all eyes are on me." "Yes, because you are horrifying." "Now, come, you're talking nonsense." "We must reunite you with your body." "Hey, where is my body, anyway?" "Um..." "Look, Puss, I appreciate your concern, but I'm happy being half horse, half man, all attitude." "Well, if you are sure, then who am I to impose species norms on you?" "Hooray!" "Thanks, Puss." "Oh!" "Uh-oh!" "And we're off!" "Yeah!" "Look out, everybody." "Here comes Eames." "Whee!" "Whoo!" "Hey, you two." "I've got something important to tell you, but..." "Well, that's funny." "I can't remember what it was." "Shoot." "Wow, this is a first." "Oh, well." "The majestic Caballo Sin Cabeza." "Ooh, it sure is hideous." "Yes, and it's had Eames's head for three days now." "It looks like it may have finally settled on it." "Oh, that's great." "And Eames looks pretty happy, too." "All is right with the world." "Oh, it's too bad he'll die once the flame on his body burns out, though." "Anyway, toodles." "Artephius." "Can you repeat that horrible thing you said very nonchalantly?" "Oh, you know, how the flame burns out?" "And then the person's head and body both immediately die?" "Oh, no." "We have to save Eames!" "Eames is a goner if you don't get his head back on his body before the flame goes out." "And there are only two ways to do that." "Get it to take a different head instead... or slay the Caballo Sin Cabeza." "Yes!" "I finally get to fight-stab something." "There's just one problem." "I don't want you to slay the caballo." "I don't want to go back to being boring old Eames." "I'm finally somebody." "A half-horse, half-human abomination somebody, sure, but somebody, nonetheless." "Eames, if we don't get your head back on your body, you'll die." "But if I go back to being just some handsome bald guy who everybody ignores all the time, that's social death." "I mean, which is worse?" "Real death." "Real death is worse." "Oh, right." "Yeah, obviously, real death is worse." "I mean, not even a contest when you think about it." "Okay, slay away." "Whoa." "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "Sorry, Puss." "I can't control this thing." "Uh-oh." "That's not good." "You'll never catch us, Puss." "Fine." "Perhaps I cannot slay this beast." "But there is no way that I cannot tame this beast." "The caballo is too fast." "Which means I'm gonna die." "Why am I always the one to die?" "Run, Puss, run!" "Puss, look out!" "Caballo, halt." "You see?" "No beast or monster can overcome the undeniable taming capabilities of the one and only Puss in Boo..." "Darn it." "Huh?" "Oh, no, no, no, no." "This was not the plan." "I do not like the way I am running." "The sequence of the four legs, it feels very wrong to me." "No." "If the caballo takes your head again, you might not have enough life left to survive." "At least I'll go out heroically in a moment of glory..." "Eames!" "I'm alive." "And I, too, am alive." "And so am I." "Good-bye, c aballo." "Puss in Boots!" "Wait, my friends." "The credit actually belongs to Eames, whose bumbling ineptitude wound up saving the day." "Yeah." "Hey, wait a second." "You did it, Eames." " Eames!" " Me?" "Wow!" "Yeah." "Everybody pay attention to Eames!" "Eames!" "Friends, I promised there would be dancing." "And tonight's victory dance shall be led by Eames, the hero of San Lorenzo." "But for today only." "♪♪ Lively Flamenco music playing... ♪♪" "♪♪"