"Easy to load." "Never jams." "Basically point and shoot." "Nice thing about the .38, it doesn't have too much of a kick." "But don't worry." "Aim it right, it'll get the job done." "Fuck." "Fuck." "I don't understand." "I'm so sorry." "I'm so sorry." "Hey." "Fuck!" "You told me." "You said he was "they."" "You said God told you." "I tried to call you, man." "You told me to turn off my phone." "You told me not to communicate." "I know, I know." "I..." "I..." "Fuck!" "Is this innocent blood on my hands?" "Is it?" "Get the fuck away from me!" "I tried to call you." "You stay the fuck away from me." "I tried to call you." "I tried to call you." "I tried to call you, man." "Josh." "Josh." "Hey, where are you?" "You're not going to believe what I did tonight." "And now I'm hungry for some Top Dog." "So if you want one, you just got to call me, okay?" "Because the window is closing." "And, um, oh, I turned in the note, and the court date is still on." "So..." "Okay, um, yeah, bye." "There's a courtroom full of people waiting for you, Pernell, including one pissed-off me." "Pernell, we got to get started." "You don't... see any doves, do you?" "Like birds?" "I think I'm gonna need a ride." "No, no, no, no, no." "No phone." "How about round three?" "Jesus, are you sure?" "You barely made it through round two." "Well, feels like round three." "I'll say." "Is that Pernell again?" "No, it's Randy." "Don't fall for it." "She's just his beard." "No, you call her back, he'll answer." "Oh, shit." "I got to go." "What?" "What could Randy have possibly said to make you leave?" "Ladies and gentlemen, thank you." "10% Day is now in the Renaissance era." "Renaissance." "Renaissance era." " You heard?" " Randy called me." "A week ago he wouldn't take his medicine." "Now he's checking himself into the crazy house." "What the fuck happened?" "I don't know, Bobo." "I haven't been home since I heard about his recent nuptials." "You left him, now?" "I needed space." "And you couldn't move into one of the other six bedrooms in the mansion?" "You need to go talk to him." "Get him out of there before people find out." "I'm running a city." "I'm giving a speech at the Kiwanis Club in two hours." "Can't just drop everything and look at ink blots with Pernell." "Not gonna be me, Bobo." "I have done everything I could to keep him in the stable." "I'm out." "Everything but stay home." " Oh, low blow." " Okay, okay." "I'm just saying, we've all taken plenty of hits for the team." "I feel like the fucking first wave on the beaches at Normandy." "Maybe we leave him in there." "No." "No, not when I'm getting my concrete pour in a few days." "Maybe when the Brooks deal is actually set in stone, then Pernell can go ahead and play Old MacDonald at the fucking funny farm, but right now, all the work that you and I have done is at risk." "This is... this is just one more hurdle we have to get over." "You... you've got to talk to him." "Bobo, I am telling you, if I see him, it's gonna make things worse." "Okay, okay." "Okay, it's gonna have to be tomorrow, but I'll take care of it." "Where's he staying at, again?" "Serenity Lake." "Maybe when you get there, you can talk to somebody about your blood pressure." "I thought there'd be a nice view." "Like at Passages?" "That's bullshit." "You're out on some bluff." "You're looking out at the ocean." "You're thinking, "Things can't be that bad."" "Well, fuck that." "Things are that bad, and that's why you're here." "You want a vacation, you go to Passages." "You want to work, you come here." "I'm here." "I know." "So what do you want?" "I've been... having hallucinations." "So you said at intake." "You've been hearing voices too." "But what do you want?" "Or did you just come here to get that off your chest?" "I want them gone." "There's an answer." "Next question." "What's causing them?" " I don't know." " Bullshit." " Excuse me?" " You're full of shit." "It's not schizophrenia." "That shit doesn't kick in for the first time when you're old enough to be a grandpa." "Something happened, and I know you didn't just ship in from Afghanistan, so what the fuck?" "I don't appreciate the tone you're taking with me." "Well, then take a swing." "I'm kidding." "I don't want to fight." "And I also don't want to waste your time either." "Most places will dose you with pills they don't understand or let you cry on a couch for a decade." "I don't go that way." "If you don't want real talk, then walk." "I thought it was God sending me messages." "So for the last few months, you thought you were talking to the Divine." "And now?" "I just... think I'm crazy." "What changed?" "My client's already answered these questions." "It's okay." "Whatever it takes to find Josh." "I called him a hundred times." "I called all of his friends, and nobody's heard from him." "And how long have you two been seeing each other?" "We're not seeing each other." "I moved with him because I didn't want to stay in my house." "But if he did go away for some reason, you'd expect him to be in touch." "Absolutely." "This is not like him." "People can surprise you." "We had this guy go missing for three days." "He had a wife and three kids." "Turns out he drove to Denver because the Broncos made the Super Bowl, and he had to stand in line for tickets." "Phone died." "Didn't want to get out of line." "You think she's overreacting?" "I'm not overreacting." "Something's not right." "I think it's also worth mentioning that one of the last people Josh was with before she lost contact with him was Pernell Harris." "Is that right?" "Yeah, Josh texted me that he was there, but I don't know that that had anything to do with this." "But we do know the only way Pernell keeps his son on life support is if Josh Miller doesn't testify in court." "You think Judge Harris paid Josh to disappear for a while?" "Maybe." "But because of that connection, we should make this a priority, don't you think?" "So we don't even know Mr. Miller's missing." "He's got his car, his car keys, and his phone." "When people go missing, the first thing we look for is something they'd never leave behind." "I'm here." "He wouldn't just disappear without telling me." "Ah." "♪ ♪" "♪ I can dream about you ♪" "♪ If I can't hold you tonight ♪" "♪ I can dream about you ♪" "♪ You know how to hold me just right ♪" "♪ Moving sidewalks ♪" "♪ I don't see under my feet ♪" "♪Climbing up from ♪" "♪ The pain in my heart 'cause it's you that I need ♪" "♪Dream about you ♪" "♪ If I can't hold you tonight ♪" "♪ I can dream about you ♪" "♪ You know how to hold me just right ♪" "I'm not angry with you." "I was gonna tell you." "You were just trying to find the right time." "Maybe there isn't a right time." "It still would have been good to hear it from you." "I know." "I'm sorry." "I guess you have a decision to make." "We." "It's your body, Alicia." "But it's our baby." "The procedure went as planned, but I don't want to get your hopes up." "There's been a lot of cranial damage, but we'll know more once the swelling goes down." "Thank you." "What did the doctor say?" "They had to operate to relieve the swelling in his brain." "How are you holding up?" "Oh." "It's okay." "It's okay." "Hey, we're a family, and we're gonna get through this like a family, and we're gonna be by PJ's side until he wakes up." "Do you want to go see him now?" "No, it's okay." "You go." "He needs you." "I'll stay here with his mother." "Oh." "You should go in there." "One of the nurses said that patients recover faster if the family spends time with them." "I'm not going in there." "What?" "PJ doesn't want to recover." "That's your son in there." "My son shot himself in the head." "He wants to die, so let him." "So your son's life hung in the balance, and you said, "Let him die."" "How long did it take you to regret saying that?" "The minute it came out of my mouth." "I didn't mean it." "You didn't mean it?" "Or you didn't mean to say it?" "I was angry." "Hey, I get it." "If someone had shot PJ in the head, you would hate that fuck for the rest of your life." "Unfortunately, in this case, that fuck happened to be PJ." "No." "I was angry at the world." "I just..." "I just took it out on PJ." "Okay, let's go back." "Anger is a by-product of fear." "What were you afraid of?" "Losing PJ, I guess." "You guess?" "That's it?" "He's my son." "Isn't that enough?" "Not even close." "A lot of people lose loved ones, even their kids." "They don't wind up swimming in a fountain convinced they have God on speed dial." "But this is a good start." "You want these hallucinations to go away, you need to figure out what you're afraid of." "Where's my coffee?" "It's in the café." "The line was long as hell." "You mean you didn't go in time." "You got something you want to say?" " No, sir." " You sure?" "Yes, Daddy." "I'm not gonna let that go." "I'm tired of having to explain..." "Mr. Mayor, do you have a minute?" "For you, two minutes." "You seem a little stressed." "Is everything okay?" "Just hosing down the normal brush fires." "Well, this might brighten your day." "We just got confirmation that Mr. Brooks will here next week for the concrete pour, and he might even make the party at the Harris estate." "Are you teasing me, Miss Wu?" "Because that's mayoral abuse, which is a misdemeanor." "And if it isn't, I'll make it one." "I'm looking at his travel itinerary right here." "I could have emailed that to you, but Mr. Brooks wants to talk to Judge Harris before he arrives." "We've been calling, but we haven't been able to get hold of him." "I'll make sure Pernell calls him." " Thank you." " Could you..." "Could you call him right now?" "Right this second?" "I know he's very busy, but things like this make Mr. Brooks worry, so if you could make it a priority..." "I'm working against a bit of a deadline right this second, but I'll have him call him, put Mr. Brooks at ease." "Good, because I would love to spend the next few days deciding what dress to wear and not wondering if this deal is going to turn into a pumpkin at midnight." "Got the message." "Thank you." "Felony." "I'm gonna make it a fucking felony." "So once you checked off all the things on God's to-do list and PJ woke up, then what was supposed to happen?" "What do you mean?" "Nothing." "We just go back to our lives." "Well, that sounds nice." "What did you imagine the two of you doing together once you got him back?" "Tell him how much I love him." "I'd hold him in my arms for as long as I could." "Feel him hugging me back." "Okay, but more than a few minutes of that would be weird, right?" "So then what?" "What did you have planned for after those first few minutes?" "I don't know." "I don't know." "Life would just go back to being normal." "Tell me about normal." "Hmm?" "What did you and PJ used to do together?" "Well..." "When he was eight," "I got him these walkie-talkies with a Morse code button, and we hung a sheet alongside the bunk bed, pretended it was a submarine." "We used to send coded messages to each other." "When he was 11, he figured out how to boost the signal, have it go across the whole house." "So when PJ woke up, you were gonna play submarines?" "I'm not saying that that's what we were gonna..." "All I'm saying is that we did do things together." "That's when he was a kid, when he depended upon you for survival." "Oh, trust me, he still depends on me for survival." "Who do you think's paying for that house he lives in?" "So it's your fault, then, that PJ shot himself?" "What the hell did you just say?" "You just told me that PJ depended on you for survival." "Sounds to me like you fucked that up pretty good." "Why don't you just get the fuck to what you're getting at?" "No, the point of this is to try to figure out what the fuck you are trying to get at and why you wanted to have these hallucinations." "Wanted?" "Who would want to be haunted like that?" "Every day is a fucking nightmare." "And yet it took you two months of having these visions to come to me, two months before you'd even admit you might have a problem." "That, my friend, is a hell of a fucking problem." " Here you go." " Thanks." "Not for nothing, but this is the last place you should be, Pernell." "That right?" "Is there a bar to go to when your son shoots himself in the head?" "Yes, as a matter of fact." "It's called the hospital." "Lots of lights and sirens." "They got a DJ that plays nothing but that Muzak." "Waitresses wear Crocs instead of heels, but they bring you the good drugs." "Any of this working?" "It's where your family is, bro, where you need to be." "They can all watch him die without me." "I'm not turning this into a Hallmark moment." "This might be your last chance to end things the right way with PJ, tell him you love him, maybe tell him how much you're proud of him..." "Stop fucking picking at me, Robert." "Please go." "You okay?" "Yeah, fine." "I'm sorry, I couldn't help but notice." "You look like you could use a friend." "I'm not looking for a friend." "Not tonight, darling." "I bet we'd have a lot in common." "Is that right?" "I recognize something in your eyes, because I've seen that before in my own." "You're sad." "You're confused." "You're looking for answers." "I bet you got all the answers." "No, not me." "But... if you're looking for someone who does, then you should come." " Hey." " Hey." "Why don't you let KD do that?" "I haven't seen him in two days." "I can't wait for him." "Well, maybe I'll go check up on him later." "Yeah." "So what are your thoughts?" "I go back and forth." "You?" "I can't think of anything else." "Me either." "I was thinking about the marina, how we used to park there and talk about our dreams." "We'd build this church, and when it was strong and thriving, we'd announce our love to the world." "We'd have a fairy-tale wedding." "First class everything." "And then we would start a family." "That can still happen." "Now we need to choose between our dreams." "A preacher fathers a baby with a young woman in his flock..." "Doesn't have to be out of wedlock." "So we run down to City Hall for a shotgun marriage, and eight months later, everyone knows why?" "So..." "You think that we should..." "I don't know what I think." "I just know what will happen if we keep it." "Not "it."" ""Her."" "Or "Paul Jr."" "All things are possible through Him." "Yes, they are." " He made all this possible." " Mm-hmm." "He brought us to San Vicente, and He pointed us to Pernell Harris." "Now we're ready to join forces with Bishop Bruce." "We are so close to being on TV." "He made all that possible." "We messed it up." "Yeah." "Yeah, we did." "We can have more kids, Alicia, but I don't think we'll get another chance at this." "We can have other dreams." "But isn't this the most important one?" "Serving God?" "I'll make the appointment." "Damn, it's dark up in here." "You having a séance or something?" "How you feeling, man?" "Oh, baby, you feel so good." "Oh, God." "You close?" "You ready, baby?" "PJ." "Oh, God, PJ." "What?" "PJ's dead." "What?" "Not dead dead, but he's gonna be." "Pernell, what are you talking about?" " What happened?" " PJ!" "PJ, PJ, PJ, PJ..." " PJ, PJ, PJ." " Pernell." "Stop, Pernell." "I need you to talk to me." "There's this boy, and he called, and his father didn't answer." "And now he's got a hole in his head, and his father, he never understood him." "He never even fucking tried!" "And now, now this boy's gonna die, and his father never answered." "He lost his last fucking chance to ever answer again." "Pernell!" "No, stop!" "Stop!" "There's this boy." "He's gonna die, not knowing his father wanted to answer." " Shh." " He'll never know." "He'll never know." "He'll never know." "KD?" "Oh, Jesus Christ." "Oh, God." "Hey." "Oh, God." "Hey." "Aw, Jesus." "Hey!" "Hey, KD." "Hey." "Hey." "What?" "Why are you here?" "I came for you." "What are you doing?" "No, I..." "You've been good to me." "Thank you." "I would like you to go now, please." "No, I'm not going anywhere, KD." "Whatever it is that you're thinking," "I want you to stop, okay?" "Talk to me." "Pray with me." "No, no more talking." "No more praying." "I'd like to be alone now." " No." " Please." "No, I'm not going anywhere." "Get the fuck out!" "Please just..." "Please!" "I've done terrible things." "We've all done terrible things." "No, you don't understand." "I understand." "I understand that if we confess our sins to Him," "God will forgive us, He will." "And we can walk beside Him in the Kingdom of Heaven." "I can't." "I..." "I have too many marks to walk with God." " I have too many sins." " No." " It's too late!" " No, it's never too late." "No, don't do that." "Jesus." "I'm no damn good." "I never have been." " No, I never was." " No, KD." " Stop." " Get out, now." " Get out!" " KD." "I'm not leaving here without you!" "Come with me!" "That's not gonna happen." "Please, don't do this, please." "You better go right now." "Don't you believe in God?" "I do... but I don't think He believes in me." "I believe in you." "Too late." "Aah!" " How long on the car?" " 30 minutes." "What the hell are you doing?" "He's gonna want to see this when he gets up." "Car's coming to take him home." "Try to at least get some pants on him." "I'm not sure home's where he should go." "He might need to see a doctor." "He lost his son." "Ain't nothing a doctor can do about that." "He just needed to get it out of his system." "I don't know." "I've seen a lot of people in dark places before, but..." "Pernell ever mention Brooks Innovations to you?" "A million times." "Says it's supposed to put San Vicente on the map like Google did Mountain View." "Right, well, that can't happen if they hear Pernell's in the hospital." "Life will go back to normal, trust me." "Just get him in the car and get him home." "Thank you." "And again, I cannot stress the part about the pants enough." "You okay?" " You okay?" " Yes." "Leave me the fuck alone." "No, KD, stop!" "If you go in, I go in." "God damn you!" "God damn you." "I used to think I didn't fall apart like you because I was stronger, but now I realize it's because, if I did, there'd be nobody there to pick up the pieces." "I'd have tried." "When would you have had the time?" "You have a job, a holy quest, at least one other wife." "You know about Tessie." "So... what?" "There was a..." ""buy one, get one free" deal at the jewelry store that day?" "It's not like that, Crys." "I love you both." "Fuck your love." "You think it's a feeling." "I have been there for you when nobody else was." " Been there for me?" " I supported you." "I tolerated this insanity." "You were poisoning me." "It was medicine you were supposed to take." "And maybe if you had agreed to do it, you wouldn't be fucking here right now." "What I needed was somebody I could trust, somebody who cared about me, not just somebody who wanted to prop me up." "Fuck you!" "Do you know what I would give not to care about you, not to give a shit that you actually married somebody else?" "Because your ego can't handle it." "Because I'm a fucking idiot, and I believed in this marriage." "You really have no idea what the last few months have been like, do you?" "Worrying about you, wondering." "Wondering when the old Pernell is ever going to come back." "You mean the guy that was fucking hookers with your tacit permission as long as he kept up the Brooks deal?" "Is that the Pernell you miss?" "You are such a fucking prick." "Yeah, while you have been marrying hookers and pledging your allegiance to Jesus," "Bobo and I have been cleaning up your shit." "Bobo and you." "Well, if that's the case, you may as well just go fuck Bobo." "Oh, trust me, if he was as bad a friend to you as you've been to him," "I already would have." "Car's downstairs." "Get in it." "Head straight home." "Okay." "Take care of yourself." "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ ♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ Oh, I got to know, I got to know ♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ Help me, help me ♪" "♪Help me, Father, now, now, now ♪" " ♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪ - ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪" " ♪What are we gonna do?" "♪ - ♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ Tell me, tell me, tell me ♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ Oh ♪" "♪ I got to know right now ♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ Ooh, what am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ What am I gonna do?" "♪" "♪ Oh, what am I gonna do?" "♪" "Welcome to Hand of God chapel." "♪ I've got to know, I've got to know ♪" "Not really sure why I'm here." "God led you here." "Come on." "Praise God." "Hallelujah!" " Hallelujah!" " Hallelujah." " Praise God!" " Praise God." "Praise God." "Praise God, brother." "The Lord is with you." "You are not alone." " You are not alone." " Praise God, praise God." "Repeat after me." "Thank you, Jesus." " Thank you, Jesus." " Thank you, Jesus." " Thank you, Jesus." " Thank you, Jesus." " Thank you, Jesus." " Louder." " Thank you, Jesus." " Louder!" " Thank you, Jesus!" " Louder!" " Thank you, Jesus." " Hallelujah!" " Hallelujah." " Hallelujah." "I thought this was your car." "Anne Wu, full of surprises." "I'm so sorry, Crystal." "I know how difficult this must be." "Anne Wu, full of surprises." "Look, I know that this must feel like an invasion, but it is my job to find out about these things and..." "Spying from the shadows, it seemed dishonest." "So you decided to tell me in person that you're invading my privacy?" "Crystal, please." "Brooks is pouring nearly $1/4 billion into this project, and we have to be aware of the risks." "Well, I'm sure you'll get a very satisfying pat on the head for this." "Like I said, it's my job to be aware of the risks, it's not always my job to report them." "What's the cost of this generous silence?" "My sister was in an institution for most of her life." "So more than most," "I understand how trying this must be." "I think you're very brave." "Thank you." "Thank you for showing me your love." "Thank you for granting clarity to someone so undeserving." "Now I know, and a man who knows his true calling must do everything in his power..." " Yes, Lord." " To live up to it." "Now I devote myself to you." "Yes, Lord." "Yes, Lord." "Today and from this day forward." "Hallelujah." "In Mark, chapter 16, verses 15 to 16," "Jesus said, "Go into the world and preach the gospel" " to all creations." Yes." ""Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved."" "Yes." ""And whoever does not believe will be condemned."" "Yes, Lord." "Brother Pernell Harris, based upon your profession of faith in Jesus Christ and the confession of your sins..." "Yes, Lord." "I now baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit." "Hallelujah." "Praise Jesus." "Praise Jesus." "Praise Jesus!" "Hallelujah." "Praise Jesus." "Praise Jesus." "Praise Jesus." "Hallelujah!" "Praise Jesus!" "Praise Jesus." "Say it." "Say his name!" "Jesus." "Praise God!" "Praise God!" " Praise God!" " Hallelujah." "Hey, it's PJ." "This message will self-destruct in three, two, one." "PJ, it's me." "Hey, it's PJ." "This message will self-destruct in three, two, one." "PJ, it's me, pick up." "Answer the phone, PJ." "Hello?" "PJ, is that you?" "I need to see you, Dad." "Come to me." "It's time to stop fucking around." "Is that what we're doing here?" "Tell me about finding God." "He found me." "After PJ shot himself, I let him in." "He's the one that gave me my visions." "Your hallucinations?" "Hallucinations, visions, whatever the fuck you want to call them." "He led me to PJ's killer." "No, PJ is PJ's killer." "You know what I mean, the person who made PJ shoot himself." "You never found him, did you?" "No." "Worst hallucinations ever." "Why do you want to wake PJ up?" "What the fuck kind of question is that?" "He's my son." "Doesn't mean you don't want something from him." "Prince Charming woke up Sleeping Beauty so he could fuck her." "Everybody has an agenda." "Why do you want to wake up PJ?" "To talk to him." "Tell him I love him." "Tell him it's going to be all right." "That what was gonna be all right?" "Whatever was eating at him, whatever made him put the fucking gun in his mouth." "Why was that your job?" "Because I'm his fucking father." "Jesus fucking Christ." "So what could his father do that his wife couldn't, that his mother couldn't, that his friends couldn't do?" "They can't fucking take it back!" "What do you need the gun for?" "Home defense." "What's wrong, PJ?" "The guy said if he was getting a gun, this is the gun he'd get." "I know, just..." "Can I take a look at some of the others again?" "Jesus Christ, we've been here almost an hour." "You've looked at every goddamn gun in the store." "They all shoot bullets at bad guys." "Just pick one." "The bullets don't just hit bad guys." "Guns are 20 times more likely to be involved in an accidental or self-inflicted shooting." "We're getting a gun because your wife got raped in her own home." "She needs this to feel safe again." "Man up." "She'd feel safe if you kept your promise." "Blame me." "You said you'd find the asshole that did this." "You said you'd make sure he paid." "I wouldn't have to find anybody if you hadn't been the pussy that sat back and watched another man rape his wife." "The gun's on me." "That was the last time I talked to him, and I never got to take it back." "I never got to fucking take it back." "I never got to take it back." "That's why you manifested these visions and hallucinations." "That's why so many of them came to you in the form of PJ's voice." "The son you didn't talk to, the son that you would never talk to again." "What if you're wrong?" "What if they're real?" "What if I really am called by God?" "Right." "Wouldn't it be great if God wanted what you wanted?" "How cool would it be that He sent you on this holy mission to wake up your son?" "Then you could fix it." "Then you could make up for everything." "Then I could take it back." "Questions?" "You want to question him." "What does that mean?" "It means we want to ask him questions." "But under what context?" "Under the context that Josh Miller is missing and Pernell may be the last person to see him." "Josh who?" "PJ's best friend." "Strange, right?" " Is Pernell a suspect?" " Well, no." "There's no crime yet, but we still need to talk to him." "Yeah, I don't know where he is." "You can't get in touch with him?" " Nope." " Oh, so he's missing too?" "He's definitely not missing, but he can't talk, not for a few days." "We can't wait a few days." "Well, try." "Gentlemen, after you." " You got the tickets?" " Yep." "I'm in for a good show." "Saved message." "Sent Sunday, November 8th at 5:22 p.m." "Hey, Dad, it's me." "I know it's been a minute, but I really need to talk to you." "Today." "Please call me back."