"Liars and Other Strangers" "Can I cut it?" "Please." "No, sweetie, you can't cut it." "How come Grace can cut hers?" "I'm older than you, in case you haven't noticed." "How could I notice that?" "You got your books together?" " Is that turkey?" " What's the matter with it?" "It smells disgusting." "I can't be in the same kitchen." " God, that is so gross." " You like this turkey." "I like that turkey." "Oh, no." "Get it away from me!" "Mom!" "Mom's trying to force feed me turkey." "Zoe, help me!" "Mom!" "Don't you dare." "Oh, yeah?" "Zoe, grab her hands." "I'm trying to make your lunch." "You'll be late." "This is very inappropriate." "Come here!" "Stop!" "I have to answer the phone." "Stop." "Stop it!" "Phone." "Hello?" " Morning." " Good morning." "You sound busy." "We need to figure out a time." "Who's that?" "What's the earliest possible time?" "The dad." "She's always talking to the dad." "What do you say to 4:03?" "That seems a bit late to me." "This is ridiculous, you know that." "I know." "I'm not sure I can wait until this afternoon." "I seem to be having a similar dilemma." " Mom, can we go?" " Hold on one sec." "Honey, I'll be off in one second." "They're suspending people for being late." "You're much too adorable." "That's the problem." "Do you know what it's like to have Miss Anderson..." "yell at you for being late for homeroom?" "All right, all right!" "We're really behind here." "I'm sorry." "All right, go." "I'll see you later. 4:03." "OK, bye." "Ah, finally, God." ""Ah, finally, God."" "Are you going out with him every night?" "No, I'm not going out with him every night." "Besides, you're having dinner with Dad tonight." "Does he have kids my age?" "Go." "We're out of here." "Oh, you're kidding." "Really?" "OK." "Me, too." "Bye." "You're still here?" "I thought you were..." "We were, but we're not." "He thought his kids would be at the mall all afternoon... but apparently they have all of this homework." "They're coming back early." "Sounds like a cry for help." "Wait." "Why can't you just go to your place?" "She could." "She's just" "I can't." "I feel like Jake's gonna call... or they'll walk in on us again." "Just go to a motel." "Yeah, but that's a lot of money to just" "She means a seedy motel." "Don't you?" "Yeah." "But Mali's right." "Seedy doesn't come cheap." "Of course, he'll have to pay." " That's not fair." " Tough." "Still, there's something depressing about motel rooms." "There's always a stain you wish you hadn't seen." "So wait." "What are you wearing?" "My black lace top, sling-backs, and a miniskirt." "Just, you know" " What a lawyer would wear?" " Exactly." "Can we go?" "Please." "Sammler." "Grace, he's gonna be places." "You can't just" "I couldn't care less about Eli Sammler." "I'm bored." "And I don't enjoy watching." "How am I supposed to eat... when she's slobbering on him right in public?" "I love her taste in clothes, though." "She's obviously desperate for attention." "She's a total exhibitionist... but she is so sweet." "I wonder what she's wearing to mock trial." "Why can't-- People should just" " Just what?" " Control themselves!" "What's mock trial?" "How cool." "You have a little pocket." "Yeah." "You can hide things in there." "You are too adorable." "All right, come on." "Gotta find my sister." "It starts tomorrow." "You can still sign up." "You have to use legal terminology and stuff." "Sounds hard." "It's totally easy." "Just watch "The Practice"." "Gonzalez gives extra credit for it." "Jennifer's doing it?" "She's prosecuting attorney." " Grace should be judge." " Shut up." "People prosecuting each other sounds so harsh." "And I don't have time." "Can we get out of here?" "How about my place?" "First of all, I never thought she'd say yes." "I'm going to the movies anyway." "I'll call him." "People say things they don't mean all the time." "It's part of the human condition." "I honestly thought it wouldn't bother me." " No cats, right?" " No cats." "Taking it easy." "Moving slow." "It's always calm." "Just before the storm, you know." "She's a rainmaker." "She makes..." "Hi, it's Judy." "Do not hang up without leaving a message." "It pisses me" "Lily, it's me." "Pick up." "I'm coming back a little earlier... so if that's a problem, leave a note." "I do believe she's a rainmaker." "How come you're in Dad's room?" "Because I am." "Thought you said he'd be home when we got home." " I was wrong." " World Cultures?" "Would you quit it?" "I'm working." "Jen." "No." "Sorry." "No problem." "Is it Dad?" "Everything OK?" "Yeah, sure." "Let me speak to your father." "I need to pick you up early." "He's out getting us fried chicken." "Should I...?" "No, I'll pick you up in a half hour." " OK." "Bye." " OK." "I hate it when her voice gets like that." "Like what?" "He went to get fried chicken?" "He's with the mom." " What?" " You know what." "You were there." "I guess something about being there... just did something to me." "I couldn't deal with her bed, though." "It just suddenly became like some French movie... where the sisters are a little too close." "The floor worked surprisingly well." "How could you not hear the phone?" "We just didn't." "Oh, that explains it." "She came back early to check him out, obviously." "I had to walk out of that movie." "It made me physically ill." "What movie is this?" "You know, that movie that everyone's so..." "It's OK!" "We're" "You know, that everyone is saying is so-- with the guy from that other crappy movie." "And I told Phillip, "If I hate it, I'm walking out."" "But nobody ever believes you when you say that." "I mean, not Hugh Grant." "The other one, who I normally worship." "Wait, you worship Hugh Grant... or this other fellow whose name you can't" "I worship them both, actually." "I just--God, it was bad." "and I couldn't believe how much I hated it." "Why?" "What was it about it that" "Just how everybody was constantly... like every minute..." ""Isn't this entertaining?" "We're outside, you know."" "But isn't that the point of movies-- to entertain people?" "So you liked it?" "No, I'm not even sure what..." "Hugh Grant was or wasn't in it?" " Wasn't." " Wasn't." "I don't even know what movie we're talking about." "Then how can you defend it?" "We should all walk out of a movie together sometime." "Absolutely." "And anyway, I'm glad... it was too entertaining or whatever it was." "Self-conscious." "Right, because I got to meet you." "Yeah." "Exactly." "I wouldn't use the word "hate"." "Maybe "rubbed the wrong way"." ""Disliked"." "OK, I hated him." "And that night..." "I washed all the sheets, but it didn't help." "I kept picturing them in my bed." "I had to sleep on the floor." "So you're writing Dad a note?" " Don't move it." " I'm not!" "God." "We were supposed to interview our fathers for English." "I didn't get a chance to finish my questions." "So do it over the phone." "What do people do who don't have fathers?" "I don't know because I supposedly have one." "Then call him." "Or ask me." "I know everything about him." " You do not." " More than you." "OK, fine." "First question." "When you were growing up" "Later." "Not in front of..." " How you doing?" " Good." "Good weekend?" "Yeah." "I need to speak to your dad a minute." "He's in the shower." "Why, is he going somewhere?" "Yeah, I think." "Later." "Want me to go get him?" "Oh, God, no." "I'd never hear the end of it." "We can wait." "Did you say your good-byes?" "No, we can go, right?" "I'll get that." " Oh, big man." " Shut up." "Mom, I found all these really cute pictures... of me at Dad's from when I was young." "Oh, yes, Let's talk about you." "What would you like to talk about?" "How was your weekend?" "Did you get all your homework done?" "I didn't because I didn't have any." "I finished all my homework." "Is that what you want to hear?" "Wanna see?" "We're in our Halloween costumes." "Mom?" "Yes, yes, absolutely." " Look how cute you were." " I know." " You have my lunch?" " Got it." "I was thinking... maybe we'd go shopping after school today." "Just us." "Why?" "Because I can't afford it." "What more reason could we need?" "I have mock trial today after school." "Mock trial?" "What on earth is" "Something I have to do, OK?" "I have no choice." "Just sounds so harsh." "Well, it isn't." "It's so we'll learn about" "There's such a thing as rules, OK?" "There are legal laws, and people who break laws... who act like they can do anything they want... with no morals, like children... and they have to be stopped." "Don't let the punch crush the cupcakes because" "I know, I know." " Oh, wait a minute." " What?" "Nothing." "I thought I had more cupcakes." "Why?" "How many did the teacher say you were" "Oh, God!" "Jessie swore she didn't eat any... but I think she did." "I'm never volunteering for anything ever again." "That's the spirit." "She's still seeing him, right?" "Just one question." "I'll never bring it up again." "I swear." "Yes, they're still seeing each other... as far as I know." "So is she not very bright?" "Karen?" "Because that's what he thinks he wants." "I've got certain very basic needs right now." "I need to hear that she's a miserable, shallow person... who will make his life a living hell... or bore him to death or both." "I'm kidding." "Sort of." "How can you ask me that?" "What?" "I've had stupid friends." "She's not stupid, Karen." "What do the kids think?" "Oh, no, they haven't even met her." "That says something, doesn't it?" "If he thought the thing had a future... wouldn't he want the kids to, you know?" "So are these the worst refreshments ever?" "Natalie Curlander brought rice cakes last week... and no beverage." "Seriously, thanks." "I owe you one." "Mock trial." "Sounds fun." "That's what I said." "Like "The Crucible" kind of fun." "You haven't said anything about Rick." "Yeah, I did." "Besides the fact that he left his scarf." "He did." "I realize that." "We've covered that." "Judy." "What am I supposed to say?" "We barely--I mean, we" "It was so brief." "He's typical, that's all." "Typical wounded, you know?" ""Like me." "Like me." ""I'm needy and Waspy..." ""with all this bone structure." ""I've been hurt in this way that makes me seem interesting..." ""so try and figure out who I am while I suck you dry."" "I didn't really form an impression." "So where is his scarf?" "What?" "I forgot it." "Sorry." "Who wears a scarf in October?" "Hasn't he heard of global warming?" "A "Playboy" in her bathroom?" "And a "Playgirl"." "But a copy of "Playboy"?" "No, an actual playboy... with white loafers and a yachting jacket." "The sister..." "attractive individual?" "If you like hostile and self-absorbed... and I know you do." " I do." "Cat?" " No cat." "And you say she was... significantly more relaxed... at the sister's place, right?" "Yeah." "But she's a pain in the ass." " The sister?" " Yeah, the sister." "So this isn't a place... you'll be returning to any time soon?" "Sadly, no." "Many scientists believe that in the near future... people will actually have sex in their own homes." "OK, first of all... would the prosecuting attorney... please remove her gum?" "Thank you." "That goes for everyone." "Absolutely no gum or candy or snack foods... while court is in session." "I want to see brains working here... not mandibles." "Remember, attorneys, you need to become... observers of human behavior." "you need to study your Jury pool... and decide who is gonna be on your side." "Not that you're gonna be prosecuted... for taking these Beanie Babies... because that's over with." "So I want you to" "For you." "Where is she?" "A legal dictionary?" "From when I was a paralegal." "You were a paralegal?" "Briefly, which was too long." "I brought her a law book." " What for?" " Mock trial." " I'm not doing it." " Why not?" "I'd rather not discuss it." " And this is for you." " Oh, thank you." "What's that?" "Just a scarf I left at Judy's." "I never saw it before." "Because I left it at Judy's." "So what happened with fake court?" "Mock trial." "Nothing happened." "I didn't want to do it anyway." "The prosecuting attorney is a total slut." "Really?" "What does that mean?" "It means what you think it means." "Everybody knows what it means." "I rest my case." "Look, I don't want to get in the middle here" "In the middle of what?" "You know what?" "I want to go over there right now." "I want to return his scarf." "Who are you, and what have you done... with my repressed, boring sister?" "Am I shocking you?" "Of course not." "Hardly." "You want to go over there, go." "His kids are back with their mother, right?" " Yes." " And I'm here." "Actually..." "I need to run out for a very short time." "New catalogue." "They should make underwear like this for kids my age." "You mean they don't?" " Girls?" " Stop reading that." "I need to help Naomi with something." "And I thought since Aunt Judy was here" " Mom, I so don't care." " Just go." "Bye." "See you." "Bye." "Jake's biggest complaint about me... was always that, you know..." "I never wanted to have sex." "Hi." "And I would defend myself." "I would say, "You're wrong." ""I am interested, I do want it."" "Which, of course, was a lie." "I mean, yes, he cheated." "And, yes, he ignored me." "But, I don't know... maybe there's just something... about being married that makes you stop." "Or maybe it's something about me." "I don't know, because this person I'm with... that I hardly know... it's all I think about." "And I don't know." "I ask myself, where was all of this desire?" "Why wasn't it there for the person I supposedly loved?" "And I can't justify it." "You know that word "besotted"?" "If you want me to." "God, your mouth!" " I never really used it." " Your mouth?" " "Besotted" in a sentence." " Nobody has." "That's what I am about..." "Nothing else matters." "Nothing else does." "I know." "We're terrible people." "We're horrible, terrible people." "We're OK people." "We're just terrible parents." "OK, when you were young... what was your favorite pastime?" " Sports." " Be specific." "Playing sports." "Not your favorite pastime--Dad's." "I'm saying Dad loved sports." "He liked other things better." "He liked drawing... and he made up this whole comic strip... but his school newspaper rejected it... so he continued it secretly." "He did?" "So give them the school newspaper answer... but add in something." "Something that Dad would say, like..." ""Now that I'm old, I'm glad they rejected it..." ""because it taught me something."" "Or something." "How to be rejected?" "Yeah." "Something like that." "That doesn't sound like Dad." "He says junk like that all the time." "And you're such the Dad expert." " Fine, call him up." " I did." "He's not home." "Wait a minute." "And you know what?" "None of this sounds true." "Where's the" "What?" "My stupid World Cultures book... which if I don't read that chapter tonight" "I bet it's at Dad's." " What's at Dad's?" " This book I need." "For World Cultures?" "Call him first." "Make sure it's there." "It's there." "Keys?" "and the pan has to be really hot." "How'd you learn to make crepes?" " Remember Franco?" " I do." "You just think you remember him." "That's remembering." "Mom said you were addicted to him." " Did she?" " I remember that." "I guess the shoe's on the other foot now." "Because she's acting like such an idiot." "I shouldn't have said that." "Don't talk that way about your mom." " The whole thing's ridiculous." " No, it's not!" "You just disagree with whatever I say." "Because I have my own opinion." "Zoe!" "Gracie, listen." "No, I'm sorry." "She's making a fool of herself." "Why are you looking at me like that?" "I know she's having sex with him." "Crepe's burning." "How late did you stay up studying last night?" "Pretty late." "Got the chapter read?" " Right?" " Yeah." "Good." "I'm glad that all worked out." "All I had to do was..." "E, it's gonna be OK." "Think of all the times you've read every chapter... and it turns out you didn't even need to." "You know?" "Have you ever heard of that?" " Good luck." " All right." "Where have you been?" "Come on." "I'm sorry." "Did I" "No, No." "I just happened to be... not far from here, and I thought I would" "She'll be back in a second." "She just went out for sandwiches." "Don't be sorry." "I'm sorry." "Why, why?" "Are you kidding?" "For barging in on you the other day." "You can't barge in if it's your place." "Yeah, you can." "Got your scarf back?" "Oh, yeah, yeah." "There's this book I've been actually... meaning to ask Lily if she could" "You really don't have to buy a book." "Excuse me?" "She'll be here any minute." "You can just relax." "I am relaxed." "What makes you think I'm not relaxed?" "Nothing." "You don't have to pretend to buy some book." "I'm not pretending to need anything." "No, I realize that." "Is ordering books allowed... or is it not that kind of bookstore?" "What kind of bookstore?" "OK, well, we should have the book... in about five business days, so..." "Yeah." "No rush." "Bye, Judy." "Bye." "Bye." "We don't special order?" "Since when?" "That's not what I said." " Why don't you like him?" " Never said I didn't." " Do you?" " No." " Why?" "What possible reason?" " I don't trust him." " You don't trust anyone." " That's beside the point." "I'm through lying for you." "What?" "Who asked you to lie?" "Forget it." "Never mind." "Look." "I understand" "I don't have a clue what your problem is." "Because you won't admit how sneaking around and lying... is part of what's making it so hot." " Nobody's lying." " Of course you are." "Fine." "Don't put me in a position where I have to lie to Grace." "That is not lying." "She doesn't have to know every single" "Lily, she's 14." "She figures stuff out." "What has she figured out?" "Liking sex is shameful... wanting it makes you a slut." "Where do you suppose she got that idea?" "That is not what I" "Eli?" "No, it's me." "Listen" "Rick." "Eli's teacher just called me." "He failed his World Cultures test." "Oh, God." "I'm just sitting here in shock." "He studied for this one." "If studying doesn't work, I..." "Why did you call?" "About this interview of Jessie's." "What interview?" "Why are you always giving me dirty looks?" "Because you're out of order!" "And you're a slut!" "I only eliminated you during jury selection... because Gonzalez made me." "It was totally a legal matter." "I assumed that." "But you still look at me like you hate me or something." "I'm really sorry." "The looks weren't directed at you." "And that may sound like a lie, but it's true." "So, how's the trial going?" "Do you want to hear my opening... thing?" "Argument?" "Sure." "OK, last question." "When you were growing up, what did you do for fun?" " Interview my parents mostly." " Dad." "We were too poor." "We couldn't afford fun." "No, no, no, I rode my bicycle without a helmet." "You couldn't afford a helmet?" "Nobody had a helmet." "Nobody knew you needed one." "Dad, that's so cute." "There's your mom." " Did she ask her questions?" " Yeah, thanks." "Hold on a second." " Jess?" " Hello?" "Coming!" "Jess!" "What's that?" "Where were you?" "Guess what?" "know that dresser you wished you had in the garage?" "I moved it there." "Wasn't even that hard." "There was a Mallomar behind it." "At least, I hope it was a Mallomar." "Did you meet her?" "Meet who?" "Never mind." "I didn't meet anyone, Eli." "Jessie found your World Cultures book." "What?" "In your father's bedroom, I'd like an explanation." " Jessie!" " No." "This is about you and me." "What?" "Eli, you lied." "What were you thinking?" " Thanks!" " I practically tripped on it!" "What was the point?" "To put something over on me?" "That has nothing to do with it!" "Then why when you knew where the book was... would you deliberately...?" "I don't know what to say." "I really don't!" "If this is your attitude, then I don't" "Don't you see that you're only hurting yourself?" "Yeah." "So where is it?" "It's my job to keep track of everything that you lose?" "Nobody said it was your job!" "Like it's your job to act like the dad?" "Tell me what to say and lie to Mom?" "It's at Dad's if you want to go get it." "You looking for this?" "Hey, hold on a sec." "I have to go." "Not until you tell me what's going on here." "I don't have to listen to you, Dad." " That is not true." " Yes, it is!" "Why'd you tell your mother you had the book?" "Why?" "Why do you think, Dad?" " I don't know." " Yes, you do!" "I do not, and I would appreciate an answer." "I was here." "OK, Dad?" "I have been covering up for you for weeks" "You were here last night?" "Yes!" "God!" "I heard you in here with her... so don't pretend I don't-- I can't tell Mom" "Oh, God." "E, I am so sorry." "What do you think?" "I wanted to fail?" "I don't want you covering up for me anymore." "I have to!" "Come on, if Mom knew?" "I mean, if Mom really knew how much time..." "It's not your responsibility to protect your mother." " Yes, it is!" " No." "It is my responsibility, OK?" "Because it upsets her too much." "You don't live there, so you don't know how much." "Sorry I'm late." "No problem." "I wasn't with him." "I met Naomi for lunch." "I did!" "I believe you." "Look..." " Look, you were right." " No, I shouldn't have." "I should've been talking to Grace about this all along." "I'm bad at this." "Bad at being bad." "So many times in the past, I watched you become... totally consumed with some guy... just completely and utterly..." " Besotted?" " Yeah, yeah." "And I guess I've..." "Oh, I mean..." "I mean..." "You've thought less of me." "Yeah." "It's hard to admit things... so, yeah, it was cool that she admitted it." "It still hurt." "You can still talk to Grace about this." "I can't." "I don't know how." "Sure you can." "Look, the only thing I've ever done... better than you is lose control... and it turns out you can do that, too." "You can do anything." "So, that lunch story?" "You sticking with that?" "Yeah." "He should have told me." "I can't believe it." "I can't believe he felt he had to lie to me." "You think this is my doing, don't you?" "I didn't say that." "You don't have to." "It's obvious you think..." "I'm sending him some sort of distress signal... that I'm asking him to protect me or something." "Karen" "You're implying that it's my fault." "It's my fault." "I've been leaning on him." "I've let my son see how hurt I am." "I've allowed him to see that." "And deep down, I've wanted his help." "That's exactly what I swore I'd never do." "I'm not implying anything." "This is him." "He's convinced himself" " Karen" " Two minutes." "Sorry." "Well." "OK, look..." "I'm relieved." "I am." "It was awful to think that he could study and do so badly." "But the point is" "I know what the point is." "What's the point?" "The point is" "The point is that he needs to know that" " My relationship with Lily..." " Yes?" " Isn't something to be" " Kept from me?" "Yes." "Don't forget your scarf." "Thanks." "Mom!" "Mom!" "Jessie, you better be injured." "What is--Oh, God!" "Spider." "Grace, come on." "I really would rather not do this." "Same here." "Get your shoes on." " Do it the way Dad does." " OK, Jess." "Shush." "Dad never kills them." "He puts them in a cup." "Shut up." "I know." "Thanks." "You did that really well." "No problem." "You've been taking care of a lot around here." "I guess." "Well, you have." "And you're really good at it." "So, what's your point?" "You don't have to take care of me." "OK." "No." "Don't just say "OK" like that." "Listen to me, I know your father is seeing someone." "I know that you know." "I don't need you or Jessie or anyone... to try and shield me from it." "OK?" "OK." "OK." "Mom?" "Yeah?" "It's not like..." "I don't think that there's anything... amazing about her." "And that's not shielding you, Mom." "That's just my opinion." "Come on." "Why are you all the way back there?" "'Cause, I don't want to be seen with you." "Oh, you're serious." "Hey, wait." "Why don't you want to be seen with me?" " Mom!" " No, really." "What?" "You don't like my sneakers?" "Partly." "And partly because I'm seeing someone?" "I met a girl I kinda like today." "Actually, I already knew her... but I didn't know her." "I knew who she was, but we never really talked." "What's her name?" "Mom, do I pry into your personal life?" "No." "There's certain subjects... that I would just rather not discuss." "Well..." "I can understand that." "You can?" "Of course I can." "Absolutely." "Good." "Wait up!"