"translator:cadiyaman" "Dane Cook- Rough Around The Edges" "WARNING This program contains insolent jokes." "Are you guys ready for some comedy?" "Maximum loaded and shows its suffice!" "He has been harmful." "He has been wishes." "He has been what you want and want to live Madison Square Garden." "Please Wellcome!" "Dane Cook!" "Madison Square Garden." "You, your, super!" "This is on the fun in here tonight." "If you allright?" "This is." "The thing is, i just came out the bath." "Someone shit on the pubs." "Someone shit!" "Thank you so much." "Here is full and people is great tonight as always." "Thank you guys." "Thank you." "So much i want talk about." "So many things i wanna get you tonight." "It took a long time." "To the long time." "Want this to come here and play this." "But i did have other dreams, other inspirations." "Let's go back a little bit." "Let's talk about I think, I'd like to refuse my use." "Because i did have another dream long before." "I saw doing stand-up comedy." "Sometimes it hurts to talk about." "I never forget." "Every single week me and my brother, we said;" "Dad, dad!" "We gotta Benson's Animal Farm." "That's who are to go Benson's Animal Farm." "We heard about Benson's Animal Farm." "That was my fucking quest." "Ok?" "There were lahts,there were animals, You can pad a llama and feed it nuts." "You can go on a Zebra and smash your God damn tits out your face." "Because that why it's really." "A hazard in everyway shape." "Who gives a shit?" "It's Benson's Animal Farm." "Back my dad." "Dad come, please." "We go to Benson's Animal Farm." "You know what; every single week my dad so pumped up." " Hey." "Hey kids, get around here." "Get around your oldman." "Guess who gonna do this Sunday?" "We are going to Benson's Animal Farm." "Could on your fun have." "We'are on our way." "Yeah." "We said, we said;" "Scubby liby doo!" "We say that my house." "Don't judge me." "We said scubby liby do." "I get a cup of drink some time to time, right?" "Our Drinking guys, sure." "Ok.Just say you know." "Here's one when you are officially drunk." "When you get a taxi cab you think the fair is the time." "Oh my God." "It's 25 past 24 Holly shit." "My papa'd a few drinks." "One night he had like 427 beers and boom!" "I said" "Dad, dad." "I thing you should slow down drinking beers, right?" "One of his favoritte words comes," "Hey hey!" "Don't tell me about how many beers i am having." "Allright?" "I am a little bit older and i've been around the block a couple of times." "I am on the block." "That's could you do fucking drunk find the house dad, ok?" "You got 500 beers." "Oh yeah." "You don't know your ass on your alba." "I never go in bathroom." " Oh." "Allright." "Oh, what am i doing?" "Show it up." "Saturday night my dad starts having thoose fucking beers." "Sunday morning." "We gonna, we suppose to leaving at 8 AM Dad'n we leave 8 AM." "We fucked because he went to bed at 7.58." "We all be standing there, right?" "Edge of the bed." "Have my baroqueted jacket on, my Lee jeans." "Golden zips And i looked fucking good." "Zips man!" "In the commercial the zips, kids start lighting came out off it!" "The commercial lies!" "Asking schooll was like fucking some zips!" "I try to bid up." "I should 've some lighting on the my deal." "No fucking lighting come out zip." "Then we back." "Dad." "Hey dad wake up." "Time to go Benson's Animal Park." "My dad didn't wake up." "You wouldn't just wake up." "My dad woke up, like coming out exorcism." "What What What?" "!" "We said;" " Time to go..." "8 o'clock we gonna Benson's Animal Farm." "My dad get up his arm, he go;" "Hey listen." "We are gonna Benson's another day." "Today is not the day for Benson's." "We are gonna go another day." "I so lied down." "Right immediately We just flayded." "You said, you said." "We don't stop wailing." "You said, you said this." "And number one quote." "I know you all heard one point another." "My dad turned to us and go;" "Hey!" "Benson's isn't going anywhere." "If you sitting,sounds like fun." "A place where i can have capitated fun." "Where is this place located?" "Well." "It's fucking gone!" "It went somewhere and i never went." "I didn't get him back down." "When my dad like 80 year old." "Sick on the couch, coughing..." "Dane, I need you take me hospital." "You know what i gonna say?" " You know papa, the hospital is not going anywhere." "It's not over." "Then i 'll take him my car and drive empty parking lot." "He gonna go;" "Hospital is nowhere nere here." "This is where Benson's use to be." "My dad did the best he could." "You know all these guys worked hard." "I think, i wish we change our life our path." "We got those things, right." "You wanna go back and have a due over." "But you can't." "You gonna live with it." "A very few." "I would share that one thing i have, something i said recently." "In my life." "I wish i could take it back." "As it left my lips, Sounds like NO!" "I stay with my body." "I stay in Newyork." "Right?" "My friend Matt." "He goes;" "Hey listen man you coming in New York City." "I want you stay with me ,dude." "You gonna stay with me." "We'd like all time man." "Come on cries with me." "You can sit on fucking full time dude." "Here is the thing really suck." "I get there." "He has got the full time..." "But he has got no mattress support yet." "He just got a medal rag." "That the food go on aperently." "Instead he's got like;3 pie bounty paper towels some kind of make schift." "Pass your pitik mattress." "So staying in bed, here is what happen!" "He comes in one day, right?" "He comes in and he goes towards freezer." "He goes freezer." "Didn't say hello to me." "Like!" "He opened the fridge and straring inside the freezer." "Just looked around." "Then looks back me, and he goes;" " AAAA" "And he looks back freezer again." "And i go;" "I don't speak A-A What is this?" "What is?" "Looks back." "He was really searching, moving, freezers." "He was stearing the freezers like fucking Narnia!" "Why dou you looking at?" "He turns back to me." "Where is it dude." "Where is it?" "I go;" "What?" "I don't know." "What do you searching for?" "He goes;" "Where is my fucking ice cream dude?" "My ice cream was here man." "And i wanna know where it is." "Because it is not in here." "I looked him very sincerely." "I said i don't know." "I really don't know where in this World your ice cream is." "You certainly looking great spot for ice-cream." "Very cold in there." "That the tempeture is there suppose to be." "Then he starts really disturbing me." " Dude, i put fucking ice-cream in here man." "He take steps through me." " You know what?" "It's just you and me here." "And i've been thinking fucking ice cream at work all day." "And i said him, i go;" "That's pathetic." "You were thinking about creamy delights all day." "That's really..." "So, you thinking may be getting promotion to get out me from this dump." "You were thinking creamy-tastes." "That's really great." "Good for you man." "You had my fucking ice-cream bro!" "You had my fucking ice-cream pal!" "I know it." "Chief!" "I said, Listen me here bro, i don't need your fucking ice cream." "You know how i come here." "Here is the regret." "I said something, this moment it hurts my heart that i actually said it." "Because he had me corner right?" "I didn't need the ice cream." "I stand up and i finally go;" "I sware on my unborn childs life." "I didn't need your fucking ice cream." "As it came out from my lips, i thought too much." "I have now involved my unborn child in an ice cream the battle." "I really regretted." "Here's the real reason why i regret more than anything else." "I start thinking guys what if two or three years from now i meet the woman my dreams and we make love then she is..." "We gotta move to fucking stadium radio." "Because lot of fucking chicks i gotto maintain." "Good Lord." "That's gonna be at least 38 vajinas." "That doubles." "How many tits.8, 2, 16, 6, 7." "I sware on my unborn childs life." "I shouldn't said it." "What if one day my wife in the deliver room and she's about to give birth." "She just, She is gonna do, she just palm in." "Come on, i don't have time unwear my pants to show entire baby birth." "Would you please allow me to this one?" "She is gonna look like this." "What if something happens to that child?" "Do the child birth complications, the baby doesn't make it." "The first thing i'm gonna thing is," " Fuck!" "Now may thing i ate ice cream." "Hold on." "I am coming back." "Dude, this was a fluke i sware on my, next unborn childs life." "One thing i was having about at home i was watching History Channel." "Here is the thing." "Tell the truth." "I don't want to watch History Channel." "Apparently, my fucking Tivo* wanna be watch on History Channel." "Because it went in tape 5,5 hours stuff that." "I don't even asked to do." "You would do that?" "You come home, ok where is Lost." "It doesn't record Lost." "But your Tivo or Avo just decided record some kind of craft show." "Like some antique thing like five hours." "Tivo suggestions things you like antiques." "This Tivo is about to be fucking antique, could i throw it God damn window." "I act physical with my tivo." "Hey, hey, fucking record my shit." "I don't know what you thinking." "I ll give you water ok." "That's the deal." "You record my shows i ll burn a candle on you ok?" "Do you know what raks compenents?" "Do you even know?" "Then i ll call my team." "I call Tito*." "I just respected, alright Tito?" "I ll call you Tivo when you record my shit." "Tito?" "Do your fucking job." "Record my favoritte shows." "I watch Lost, That's my favoritte show." "Didn't record Lost." "I was so festinating." "I'm gonna do quick impression of me watching Lost." "Here is me." "Every single time it goes to a commercial during the show Lost." "Here's me." "Ready?" "What the fucking going on here?" "I hate this show." "I hate it." "42 new questions and no God Damn answers." "What's that big smoky creature, that nobody fucking thinks about when they go to piss in this woods that smooky dragon things." "So records the History Channel." "I started watching Stuff About The Civil War*." "The reason i like to watch Stuff About The Civil War is because;" "I believe that i was in the civil war." "No no, i want to Klear Wayn one time." "She told me on the past life." "She goes;" "You are gonna in civil war." "I said i feel this, i feel this." "Because i watch programs about the civil war." "Sometimes, i feel like i know people." "Like, there is Jane." "Lyod!" "I would know you little mother fucker." "Here you go." "Build that road." "I did, i went Kler Wayn, she told me in the civil war;" "What else?" "In the life before that You were ferro." "I was a ferra!" "I was in a civil war and i was a ferra." "That's not bad." "I should protect her reasonly." "Going for job." " No, no." "it was about management." "I was a ferra." "I was in a civil war i believe i won it actually." "I believe i won the civil var, personally." "What if i see those civil war shows, do you think them montage photos." "Because they had cameras back them." "Cameras like, fucking burned house." "Then was like a, stack, powder, and then explode." "Take somebodys eye during the picture you seeming like this." "They did'nt know anything about smiling then." "Do they?" "Nobody." "You see all those pictures they're all making the same things, right?" "They were staring like." "Would they getting ready for the picture like." "Ok." "Ready." "I'll take a picture." "Everybody looks stocken and creepy." "It makes me wonder." "When those pictures falling wollen, i am sure it's ok years and months." "Do you thing like today, everybody gather on the picture Hey, they're gonna picture, They gonna picture." "...on the railroad." "Look, look...allright." "Johnson smiles." "We all look sad and down trun and Johnson looks everybody liar for need!" "When i watch this shows about civil war, i feel like i was in it." "I'd find anywhere on the battlefield." "But there's one place that's gonna suck." "Beeing guy the play is the flute." "That had the blow." "You can ready for fucking battle." "It's gonna be can and masquets" " Where's my fucking?" "Allright, you guys." "We are ready to go." "Let's do this." "That's look i was a fut like." "Holy shit!" "I need a bayonet on the hand my flute." "Can anybody hook me up?" "And one thing you know you got one guy next to you on the drum." "A guy on the drum and he knows one biff (vuruþ-nota)." "You know drummers, you know drummers." "They're fucking spazes. (Aptallar)" "You know that drummer at one point even knows she was blowing up the stuff just turn the guy with flute;" "We're so good man!" "We should go on he road." "And i know you're in the battle, I am talking digs." "Just you and one drummer." "Hey!" "Fuck" "Ah!" "I am shut!" "I'm fucked!" "God damn it!" "Some of whore." "You flicking do the channels." "You know you feel really fucked up when you see this." "You just look there is a couple little kids." "They were sitting a playing pattle." "Sitting and playing with a template lift back and forth." "First she like;" "Hey, who these kids?" "And you like;" "Oh shit!" "These are needed kids." "And you ready chance your channel like, you like i'll be a hypocrite." "I have the list watch the commercial." "And those kids are so adorable Right?" "They're sitting there, they just looking at the camera." "And for one second right?" "One spust second." "You are remote like;" " I gotta get the fuck out here." "This kids me if you'll bell." "And the old guy comes in." "You know." "You know this criss cringle bruised looking mother fucker." "Comes in with his new cakkies on and his blue Baknap* shirt." " Hello!" "Top on the evening to you." "I am sure." "You can probably see that." "These kids are need." "You are not having a..." "You are not having a easy go." "The reason that more people don't give is because of this guy." "He starts tell us some information." "For 15 cents." "15 little pennies." "You can change one of these childrens life." "Look at right here." "This is my Gogu." "This is the one Madonna didn't want." "So, he is dunk in the pan." "That's the good little tike." "For 15 cents you can fix this clept lip." "And 17 ax her." "But you don't give." "You don't give!" "You don't give." "And i blame the old guy." "I blame him." "You know why?" "He's too nice." "He's too sweet." "And whole Americans" "We need are fucking ass his kid." "Ones in a while." "If you too nice and too sweet that's not gonna work." "They need have a fucking dude." "A lather jacket, few days and growth beard." "Just step in the frame." "Look right we 'll go." " What the fuck are you gonna do help these fucking kids?" "We playing in a fucking puddle on month." "You just gonna sit there for 15 fucking cents." "It's 15 fucking cents." "Are you kidding me?" "Are you fucking kidding me?" "These kids need help now!" "You fucking selfish, narcissistic, egotistical." "Said i 15 fucking cents." "15!" "Think about that for a second." "You gonna fucking coin jaws in 1985." "Then you've never sent a coin stock." "15 fucking cents you idiot!" "Call three friends, get a nickely each, and fucking help this kido." "You fucking looser." "You're fucking looser, if you don't help." "Enjoy your fucking show." "Mary fucking christmas." "Come on kids." "These guys giving shit about you!" "Good night!" "Bye!" "I tell you need." "What they also need to do is take those little kids and put them another staff." "They need to like, CGI those kids in the other shows that you try to watch." "When you're watching like a Will  Grace, that little kid Gugu, is just  walking the frame, besides he says;" "Remember me?" "Then Lander Jackie guy comes ot." "What the fuck are you doing?" "You were seen this film Grace, 19 fucking times!" "Will  Fucking Grace!" "She says, He's guy!" "We know!" "15 fucking cents." "You fuck." "Fuck you viewer." "I tell you something guys." "Thank you." "This is the stuff i think about when you work all day." "Yes." "I watched Oprah the other day." "I didn't mean to watch Oprah." "My Tivo wanted to watch oprah." "So apperently i need to watch Oprah a little bit." "I do watch Oprah man." "Oprah is fastinating." "Oprah, she really entertains me." "And here is why." "There are two kinds of Oprah shows." "Two." "There is one show, that is very exiting." "When she's talking about gadgets." "Or she is gonna interview celebrities." "You know that Oprah show starts off." "Exiting." "The film music is in." "OPRAH!" "And Oprah comes in fucking skate vole." "Hi, hi and everybody." "All is are." "Hey-Hey!" "And she starts giving shit away." "You know she is like come on it." "And everytime she gives more and more shit." "Like bigger stuff." "The other day she came and she was." "Everybody here get a school!" "You gonna school!" "You gonna school!" "We all in this like;" "What am i doing with the fucking school?" "Everybody here get a school and school district!" "And a full faculty!" "You gonna school!" "Are you fucking kidding me?" "Everybody here help that well!" "You gonna help that well!" "You gonna help that well!" "Everybody get help that well!" "Harrison Ford is here!" "Harrison Ford is here!" "Oh yes Oprah." "God damn it." "She is giving whales and flying around jackpads." "But the end;" "There is entirely different Oprah Show." "Not so fun." "Not so carefree." "And Oprah;" "She doesn't come all silly." "She doesn't come in throgh this stage like Michael Jackson on the flatour." "No." "Oprah's just standing her silly wet." "That is all you see." "And a light, illuminates Oprah." "And she does say;" "Pedophiles!" "You could be a pedophile." "Right now." "You probably are a pedophile." "That's what the whole show is about." "Whole show is about pedophiles." "Everything one of see is uncle." "Everybody here i am sure has an uncle that diddled them at some point." "Right?" "Is that we hear?" "Everybody's gonna uncle diddle that took you in a game closet somewhere." "And just bath did you shit around." "For me that was like;" "What is this about?" "What is this about?" "And all you remember is lying there." "Looking up to the games." "Sorry." "Risk." "Everykind of protoin to" " What is happening?" "Candy lamp." "Ah!" "I am the lass jointed right there." "At there i was." "But, here what's happen on the show." "Ok?" "I am here to warn you." "I am here to warn you." "She starts to talking during the pedophiles show about these kidnappers." "And the way you can find out who the kidnappers are;" "...in your neighbourhood, in your community. ...who this people are." "And i thought that is awesome cool." "This's exiting." "Look at me right now." "Don't do this!" "No bullshit!" "You don't wanna know!" "I went to the website." "I typed my address." "I hit search, i fall, i hit enter, may be it show my place." "Like, three little dogs." "I 'll be never wait them." "I 'll be never wait topo." "There was so many dogs." "You can even see my house." "My house had a push other dogs are the way." " I'm here, I'm here." "It's scare shit out me." "It wasn't just red dogs." "There are so many different kinds of colors." "Like rapest dog, and then you know, pink pedofhiles dogs." "Like blue." "Rapist over eat." "It was like all kind of combinations." "Lord of dogs were in my building." "In my building." "Maybe this is where they all in are planning some kind of rape attack." "Like this is the," "How i feel like i insult threater like." "May be they rape in to my computer second i had the enter;" "When i'm gonna open the window;" " Fidos!" "The guy to be fidos!" "Get him!" "Do not go to this side." "You click a dog and shows you a little picture." "And the picture stats like a rapist baseball card." "If you click all my rapist;" "there is a puzzle on the back." "There is a rickety van puzzle on the back." "With the clown holding a glass dildo." "Quick question." "Just a little silence." "I wanna know this." "How about see a mannequin with no arms." "Who is that for?" "Somebody is walking by down that window," "With no arms." "Lost arms on a tragic arm loosing accident." "They just stop." "Oh my God that tople looked fantastic on me!" "I also had known." "Sometimes you see mannequin with no head." "A capitated person walking around." "In a new polo." "If i would just become a torso, put that sure about me?" "Have you ever seen a mannequin you wanna fuck?" "Beause i have." "I saw a mannequin standing on the window other day." "And it's just turn me on, something about this fucking mannequin." "I don't know who stands like that." "I started to getting a rut at this fucking mannequin." "Then i made a mistake." "Told my girl." "I saw this mannequin today." "I thing i wanna fuck her." "I am ruined, i'm ruined." "Because at first, girls you laughs like;" " You and your silly banana." "You laugh at that point." "Until argue a month later." "Where did you see that fucking mannequin?" "Just go fuck that mannequin!" "If you really wanna do!" "If you wanna fuck that Mannequin!" "And you say guys;" "I wanna fuck that Mannequin!" "It's all your whore fuck that mannequin." "And i fucked you thinking fucking mannequin." "I tell you at this point." "I would probably rather have sex with a mannequin." "Then have any kind of promiscuous stuation man." "That's too much weird a shit." "I would rather fuck a mannequin, in a risk a spilinter." "Let's talk a little bit about it." "Right?" "We all know." "Herpolies right?" "All herpolies out there." "When ever you say that there's always weird shift." "Some people laughing other people." "Hey why would you mention that?" "This is a place of entertaintment escape, isn't it?" "I can feel bell truck preinscription." "Burunlu araba klavuzu You would bring that up." "That's correct.Now i am stressed on my have a point." "One our of four people have herpolies." "One of our for." "Let's play a little game." "Look around right now." "One our of four." "One our of four.Who is it?" "Anybody wanna must that." "Because we know that." "Guys are like no they have herpolies." "You know this girls." "We worn it meant, to ourselves that we have herpolies." "Your fun will call you, and start talking about this crazy shit." "That is got on the schaft." "The guy.We warn tell him right the way." "Dude, you call get the fucking Herpolies urpolies, dude." "No." "Guys will anybody call." "Hey, hey listen man." "Can i talk you for a second?" "I got this fucking shit on my dick, dude." "Fucking really." "It's fucking." "Really good she's man." "Oh really, what, are you kidding me?" "Are you using like a new detergent?" "Or a new soap?" "Yeah, yeah." "I actually yeah." " I just switched it over." " That's it dude." "That's fucking it." "That's it bro." " Oh shit." " That's it man." "That's it." "Like a or two mounth later, your body call you again." "Dude, can't fucking." "Can't that shit, dude." "Did you switch detergent?" "That you tried that?" "Yeah, yeah" "I don't even use detergent anymore." "I just fucking wash my shit in the river." "Ok." "And it's just really..?" "Yeah dude, fucking..." "You know, it's fucking." "Let me ask you this." "Have you ever trim your shit?" "You shave it up?" " Yeah." "Ingrown hair bro." "That's just ingrown hair." "That's just ingrown hair." "Oh!" "That's it dude." "Thanks brother." "Thanks man." "That's just ingrwon hair." "That's cool." "He just keep phoning." "Finally call you again." "Dude, i've trimmed my shit." "It looks like fucking gom gun there man." "It's crazy." "I don't use any soap anymore." "It looks like fucking hay stack after." "After people of ben." "You know, one roll around and just really atrocious and awful." "Ok, ok let me ask you this." "This is like is any down there?" "Like, do you see anything?" "Yeah, yeah." "What's it look like?" "It can looks like a cluster diamonds coming on my dick." "You know this port satellite in Superman's layer." "You know that the christal thing." "That's coming up out there." "Yeah." "It can looks like that." "It looks like that." "Ok." "Ok." "That can be a frostbite." "You sticking your dick in snow recently?" "Yeah, yeah i did." "That's it dude." "That's fucking frostbite." "Awoid the fact or you gotta hurts." "The funny thing is girls if you got it." "Guys, we don't even give a shit." "As you about to do it, you're naked, you finally there." "You are on the bed." "You're rady go." "And she stops you." "She is like;" "Ah, can i do say something?" "I know that's really hot intense." "But..." "Oh, Golly." "I..." "I have  herpolies." "Oh shit!" "Let me think, let me think." "What side is on?" "It's on the left." "Ok." "I'll just pill that back and coming fro the East." "Ok." "Just hold that shit back." "Give like a book or something." "I can just put in between." "Ok." "Girls can be so decepted sexsually." "It's really amazing." "You really know how get us point of organ." "And then just fucking shut that shit down, like you're lane on the cable bill." "You know girls right?" "You meet somebody right?" "Have you drinks on." "They thinking on you fucking go around on the bed,and start taking fucking out the clothes to get exiting." "At the that point guys, we always think;" "Oh shit." "I've no fucking condom." "Well, you know what?" "Who gives a shit?" "I feel lucky." "We don't what gonna stuff us." "We don't gonna stuff us." "So," "We take our time, right?" "Peel your clothes off and suck your browridge." "Sometimes we suck a little too hard." "And girls you like." "You go;" "Oh." "Just one little." "Oh." "Panties off right?" "Panties are off." "There is a vajina." "It's fucking glowing in the moon light." "For steen moist." "Similar call like a pill is very, doo cocky but a vajina." "Virgin." "Hot and delicious." "Right?" "There we are, right guys?" "We start emptying away up Torgo*." "We just so hoping, you don't stop us." " You so fucking..." "And would you that things words like;" "The Robocock around you vajina." "Like a slip pomp and were playing at to you." "The vajina is very drawn." "And i have a band... on my..." "At up till to that point." "Girls do this thing." "You act like you're lost." "A girl when about the sex." "You do this thing." "You just;" "You, you.." "Oh my God." "Oh my God." "I don't... i don't believe this." "Where am i?" "Right?" "In the right there." "You lost." "The second we gonna put it in." "You like this." "You like this." "Wait!" "Who goes there?" "We just frozen and fear." " Ay!" "I was just gonna put in a centimeter." "And that's when you ask us, right?" "Do you have a comdom?" "Do you have a protection?" "No, we don't." "But just, give us a minute." "Let's try to explain our way in." "We try to" " No, no, like many people are come might bouse this clamper thing." "Like a, like a full minute before i even..." "So i can actually get out, get out to the bathroom." "I get a minute." "I have a minute." "I 'll pull out and i can just dump it right here." "Even payt a little target." "It comes on times." "And it's like so precise." "It just feels like one little..." "And sometimes you coming..." "looks like a bad pancake, right?" "Just a pancake that you got away." "Looks like a meebo." "What the fuck is..?" "Do you have a condom?" "Hold on for a second!" " I think i do." "We leave the bed and we look in our jeans." "We don't have on." "Hoping some kind of condom Very, put in fucking condom on them on." "He is gonna pick out." " Have fun fucking." "Thanks condom Very!" "And then you try to convince her." "You know what baby, i got some..." "bigleechu." "May be i can fashion some bigleechu on the tip." "Make some kind of rudimentary shield." "No?" "No?" "Ok." "Do you any cellophane?" "I could..." "Or maybe a laminating machine." "You have a go your place guys." "The only condom you have is like a fucking antic condom." "You searcing throught and then you find it." "And it's like from a company, that isn't any existince anymore." "The protector!" "And not only that but this condom, was the condom you hading your pocket when you feel overbold during a DC fashion expeditions." "So it's all fucking wrinkly." "Looks like Gollum's* asshole." "You were like;" "This'll, this will work." "You look it the experitions date It says:" " Don't even think about you idiot." "You riped, opened prum of dust comes out." "You know the rule of the condom." "The rule is this;" "If you go to put the condom on, and it's wrong way..." "And it doesn't unfold;" "You gonna scrap that condom." "But nobody fucking follows that." "Infact every single guy does little thing in there head like this;" "Trampoline" "Trampoline!" "I put that condom on, and it's so old." "You know i gotta really take it easy here." "I can go two banana sandwich here." "I gotta really..." "So you there, start to do it." "You put it in," "And immediatly were just like sad things." "Heads your heard." "You like;" "Right?" "We turning." "We stalked." "We start stalking." "She is like;" "How is that feel?" "Like nothing!" "Feels like i hate you." "Have you have that shit?" "Break?" "We just breaks." "But you ignore when it broke." "You ignore." "You try to convince yourselves." "You like;" "Fuck this feels awesome!" "Whore of the son!" "This condom just snap in the awesome mode!" "I must hit the right button!" "Maybe this is a hologram condom." "There was stick." "It's gone in to clocking device mode." "You deny it." "Even know you look down and you see all there is a ring." "One little piece flooping off like a shirts some pars in the pants ants." "This feel so awesome!" "And sometimes......." "You..." "You come to fruition inside." "Everybody you heard" "Ooo has a kid." "Every has a kid." "And it's so amazing how the fucking mood." "Just switches." "Up in till that point everything was like just victory rocking music playing in your head." "You seeking fucking." "Ihhh!" "And just quiet." "And you just, you just lain there." "Just looking at each other." "So quiet outside." "Hear a wolf." "How?" "Now you know big mistake, right?" "You just looking at one another." "Girls, you do this thing." "You just, you look up go, she go;" "Did you?" "Did it break?" "Yeah, yeah." "And i..." "Yeah." "It broke." "Did you?" "Did you?" "All of it." "Yeah." "All.." "I did." "And then girls;" "Ok." "You know what?" "It's ok." "I think it's ok." "Yeah." "I thik it's ok." "I think it's ok." "Ok." "Why you?" "Ok." "Why you think it's ok?" "Let me think for a second." "I think it's ok I think it's ok." "Can you tell me?" "Can you let me in to your World for a second?" "I just..." "Why is it ok?" "Are you do the pill?" "Are you also on the pill?" "Ah, yes." "Yes." "I just trying to think what i to get last." "Ok." "Let me help you." "Let me help you out." "When did you?" "What do you think you to get last?" "What do you take last?" "Let me think." "What month we have now?" "We are in the month that i'm fucked." "This is fucktember." "Please help me." "What have we done?" "I think, i should be ok." "I should be ok." "Right?" "Broke one month." "Now it is." "I am sure it's same with the girls." "It's a month of terror." "Right?" "You go that whole month." "You just walking around." "No." "No." "No." "No" "Everytime a phone rings, any phone rings you like this;" " Oh fuck here we go!" " Shit." "What." "What!" "And finally get that call, Right?" "Finally you get call from that girl." "May be it's like month or two weeks." "Your phone rings." "You hanging up boys like this." "Shit dude." "Dude that fucking shit." "She is call me dude." "I think, i fucking inside dude." "Right?" "You boys trying to be support." " Ok dude." "No." "It's fucking cool dude." "She is cool bro." "She is pretty cool." "Ok." "I am gonna answer." "I am gonna answer." "Right?" "Hello." "I stay home work sick today." "Fuck!" "Well, you know there is, there's a flott going around." "That's somebody's voice like;" "You wanna esles gonig around." "Babies?" "Fuck you dude." "Do you think that save that?" "Son of the bitch." "Hey." "You are sick ha?" "You gonna girl,this." "Can we...." "Can we talk?" "Can we?" "I'd like to see you." "Can we get together and talk?" "Right?" "And that's when you start, start a little crazy." "Yeah yeah yeah..." "What did you meet me at the top of Sud of Stares?" "And..." "What did you come with me to my cumful class today?" "I have to practice portable portatif stomach cakes." "And you can star with me." "Please." "It's so great only to get other call, right?" "Your phone rings." " Hello" "I got it!" "I got it!" "You like this?" "It's gonna happen beans." "Replaced on me." "Hard man." "I just wanna meet cool girl, right?" "Cool." "No, not sluts." "I am nice That's the think of me." "I am nice." "Girls always say that wanna nice guy." "I wanna a nice guy." "That's all i want." "I just wanna nice guy." "It's not fucking true." "They say they wanna nice guy." "Not true." "They wanna bad boy." "They wanna bad boy and you know it." "You do this i just wanna, i just wanna nice guy." "I just wanna guy that looks me end of the long day and just;" "Hey, look at through this." "A little hold the hand and spins." "We just do spins and fall the land." "Look at through this." "Look at through this." "That's not what you want." "What's the girls get around one another," "You know what they like;" "I wanna fucking bad boy." "I want him to be so bad and he wears a mask." "And he stans on the top at a building over look in the city." "I said my friend" "What is it?" "what, what will make me more a bad boy?" "He looked right.-Dude it's simple." "You know what you need?" "You need a motorcycle." "See?" "Dude, chicks love a motorciycle." " That's it?" "That's she get to me in bad hears?" "Yes" "What if my foul?" "God damn it!" "I want hurt to just be scraping on grabble." "And then have a hot bike on my." "Because i'd like shirts when i ride." "And hot tight, and a polo lane watch a woman who have to pick to bike up." "Please get it off me!" "No" "So, tell you what i did." "I didn't get a motorciycle." "I didn't need to get a motorciycle." "What i did is a working equally as well if not better." "I don't think a fucking motorciycle." "I just got the helmet." "That's all you need." "You don't need a bike." "Sometimes i take my helmet." "I go in the bar." "I walk with my helmet." "I do think like this;" "I did ride my helmet on." "I did it recenly." "I took my helmet and i went to the bar." "All in these girl, she turns, She knows this is the helmet." "And it's like my helmet is my wingman." "It's on." "She turns towards me." "She's like;" "Oh, Do you ride?" "And i was like this." "I go;" "Yeah yeah." "Fucking ride." "I ride." "That's my helmet, because of my head." "Then i go on the hog and i..." "And i hit that little puppy right there That's called the wum-wum stick." "Wum-wum stick, action." "She is really getting in to me." "Because of the helmet." "I did one girl." "She looks me, and she goes;" "So, I love bikes." "I really do." "I really love them a lot." "What kind of bike do you have?" "And i said, i go;" " It's a Chrysler." "Chrysler Cibris." "XXL series." "It's hot toxic." "She picks up my helmet and she goes;" "I wanna go for ride your bike right now." "Take me somewhere on your bike." "And i am like;" " Fuck." "Fuck fuck fuck." "Bom-Bing!" "Got it." "She starts taking me through the crowd." "I find to take her hand mine." "Ok." "Lets go!" "We go for my bike." "I take her outside of the parking lot." "I take her to in empty parking space and i am like;" "Where the fuck is my bike?" "No!" "It was right fucking here." "This is..." "That's tastes my oil." "I know my oil." "Because i put cinnemon this." "Inside my oil." "To identify;" "That's my cinnemon oil." "Shit!" "You know what should then?" "I should watch the news during the day." "See a house burned down here bike." "There was, she goes give me ride home." "Like a polo fucked the like." " No!" "This is the resting my life!" "Please take me to your home and glove to me." "It's all i have." "It's so interesting." "When somebody do to one girl one time is." "New is exiting." "New sex." "New sex school." "Experience." "And then just took a weird turn like winged." "We play little games sometimes." "We all do this during sex time." "It's the game called." "What do you want me to do you?" "If you didn't realise this." "You play." "You ask." "At one point you wanna press the person." "You just stop whatever you doing." "What do you...?" "What do you want me to do you?" "And the girls ask nothing sex here." "Right guys." "You know, Girls are like kid." "She is like;" "What do you want me to do to you?" "And this guys." "Who fuck care?" "You like;" "Throw this pancake to my face." "It's reall hard." "Yeah, yeah.You like that." "You little pacer causer." "You feel fucking." "Fuck you bad girl." "So, i turned this girl, i go;" "what do you want me to do you?" "This one she said;" "I want you to lick my asshole." "So i said;" "What else to you a guy?" "Should be have some other ideas." "Let's play outies." "May be we will save that one for rainy day." "I suppose it's good." "She wanted me going do that." "What have a decent sex." "Relationship." "Thing is about me." "I can be myself sometimes." "When i am jerking of i can get fantastical." "Here what haves to me." "Sometimes, i am lying there." "And i am jerking right?" "I am doing my thing." "And here what happens." "My brain I'll take the chick on the subway," "And i give her Heligo's teets from swordfish." "And then she has got." "Like i just, I give her some hairs." "And i am really get so..." "oh, i am...that's perfect." "No i'm fucking." "Give her crazy eyes." "And then give her like Pegasus wings to come out through this." "And she has talents." "She picks me up." "And i fuck her in the air." "We fly with the comminty." "Oh yes!" "Oh, i will fuck you dried woman." "We just fly to the skies." "And then the government catch the vindover." "They wanna study your saly." "So largen oncourse technology" "And hits her arm." "She is like." "I'm still fucking her and sucking her nine tits." "Fly jerking woman." "Fly on." "Your layer." "And we get tour a layer." "And i patch her wing." "I'm still fucking her." "And i patch her wing." "And we gets to the point were;" "I am not even jerking off anymore" "I am just landing there." "Thinking." "Madison Square Garden thank you so much!" "Thank you guys so much to be a part of this tonight." "I am here to be honour." "Thank you guys." "Thank you very much." "We had some fun,ok?" "I had found very fun tonight." "Holy Shit." "Again see you." "Again!" "translated by cadiyaman" "I love you guys." "translated by cadiyaman transleted by cadiyaman" "Thank you guys so much." "translated by cadiyaman transleted by cadiyaman" "Unbelievable!" "translated by cadiyaman" "Thank you, thank you very much." "I love you guys." "Thank you, thank you, thank you."