"(APPLAUSE)" "Come on." "Come and sit down." "Come and sit down." "Control yourself, control yourself." "I am so delighted to have Matt and David on the show." " It's one of the funniest things on TV." " Thanks." "It was a big hit on BBC Two." "Three million people?" " 3.2." " 3.2." "OK (!" ")" "How do you sum up the show for the millions and millions of other people who didn't tune in?" "It's sort of us dressed up as either women or gay men." "That's mainly where the comedy is operating." "If you like "The Fast Show", Harry Enfield, "League Of Gentlemen", it's all their jokes." " We just..." " You're being so charmingly self-deprecating." "You know what I like about the show?" "You don't hold back from looking grotesque, as we just saw in that clip." "You know, you're both presentable." "YOU look a bit strange, Matt..." "Matt was wearing a whole fat suit." "We have a brilliant make-up department who made a fantastic prosthetic stomach." "I met Matt when you were with Vic and Bob." " Yeah." " When you came in, I thought you were one of those unfortunate children who had won a competition and... was being given a chance before they passed on all too soon." " Yeah." " Matt got on "Jim'll Fix It" that way." " Did you?" " Yeah, I did." "I had the saddest Fix It you could have, basically." "I..." "I wrote in to say, " Dear Jim, please can I sit on the beanbag at the beginning of the show?"" " (LAUGHTER)" " Guaranteed to get on doing that!" "I didn't even get a badge or anything." "I just sat on his lap." "Where does "Little Britain" come from?" "Radio?" "Yeah, we've actually got a CD of our radio show, which is out for Christmas." "That's for you." "There." "Just leave it there." " That's a present for you." " Same sketches, or did you write new ones?" "Well, there's new ones on the TV show, and ones that weren't funny enough for TV are on there." "The show was on BBC Three, but will get a much bigger audience on Two, and even after the first night people are quoting catchphrases on the show." "I don't know if you designed them to be that, but people are repeating stuff." "Vicky Pollard does, "Yeah, but no, but yeah, but no, but..."" "which you probably did slightly better than me." "Where does she come from?" "Vicky Pollard is a teenage delinquent character that we did." "I find it really hard to do." "She speaks very, very quickly." ""No, but yeah, but what happened was this thing I didn't know nothing about." It's sort of... (APPLAUSE)" "Ah, you guys!" "There's no great trick." "It's just about 40 takes." "We were talking about doing a character who was the least articulate person in Britain." "And it became a teenage girl who stammered and stuttered." "And then we thought, "Why?"" "She's done something very wrong, so she's up in court or..." "There's a story over the series with her where she gets expelled, is up for shoplifting, she gets pregnant and she eventually swaps the baby for a Westlife CD." "And the social worker says, "How could you?" and she says, "I know, they're rubbish!"" "Let's have a look at Vicky in action." ""Little Britain", Monday nights, BBC Two." "OK, this is Matt as Vicky Pollard." "Come here, please, Vicky." "Vicky, it's been two weeks now and I haven't received your essay on Lord Kitchener." "No, because what happened was I was going round Carl's, but Shelley Todd is a bitch anyway and she said Destiny stole money out of Rochelle's purse and I ain't even spoken to her." "Vicky, I'm more interested in your coursework." "No, because this whole thing happened what I don't know nothing about, but anyway - shut up!" "I never even stole her card, so shut up!" " Have you even started this essay?" " No, but yeah, but no, but yeah, but no 'cause I'm not even going on the pill." " Do you want to pass your GCSE?" " GCS what?" "Don't go giving me evils!" "(APPLAUSE)" " How do they do it?" " Let's talk about some other characters." "You cross-dress on a regular basis, and in the show as well, you occasionally..." "There we see Emily Howard." "Are you telling me you didn't enjoy that just the teensiest bit, Mr Walliams?" " It was pain all the way." " But you do seem very camp." "So do you!" "So do YOU!" " You see?" " How dare you!" "Camp?" "Moi?" " What are you getting at?" " You're saying, "You're really gay!"" "No, I'm not!" "I love your campness, I embrace your campness." "In the olden days, effeminate men were very heterosexual." " I'm all for that as well." " And pale and fat was considered attractive." " (LAUGHTER)" " What?" "You know you're an attractive man." "You've certainly got an inner beauty." " And outer beauty." " I'm beautiful on the radio shows." " When did you guys first meet?" " We met, actually, in 1990 in the National Youth Theatre and we were at the halls of residence." "We were the funny ones in our group." "And we both did impressions and so they sort of said," ""You should meet each other." "You'd get on." I didn't want to meet someone funny!" "I want to be the funny one." "Anyway, we swapped impressions and we fell in love and here we are." " Which impressions did you do?" " OK, Matt did..." "I used to do Jimmy Saville." "There's some sort of obsession." "There's something going on." "I used to come out in my stand-up act and say..." "Now, then, now, then, we have a letter, we have a letter." "It reads," ""Dear Sir Jim'll, please can you fix it for me" ""to come on your show and call you a BLEEP?" ""Yours hopefully, yours... hopefully, Fred Smith, age nine."" " That's my Jimmy Saville impression." " That's very, very good." " I have to top that now!" " I'm a little lad with a big future." "Thank you." " So back then you were very funny." " And filthy!" " How funny were you back then?" " Not as funny as that." "I did Frankie Howerd." " Could we have a little?" " Ooh, no!" "Yes!" "Get your titters out!" "Ah, missus, no." "Bitter out, yes!" "Bitter out!" "(APPLAUSE)" "Matt, the first time I saw Matt on television was as George Dawes in "Shooting Stars", a fabulous creation and, once again, quite grotesque." "You came up with him?" "Or Vic and Bob?" "They said, "We want you to be the scorekeeper, we want you to be a baby called George Dawes."" "They knew that I played the drums." "And they said, "You'll wear a nappy." I said, "I won't." "I'll wear a blue romper suit."" "At that stage I'm arguing about what I'll wear!" "I'm already a baby!" ""I'll wear a blue romper suit." And it came and on the day it was pink. "You bastards!"" "So to make matters worse, every week I used to stand in the wings and Bob used to walk past me and go, "You look a BLEEP!"" "So they were really nice and really generous and they let me do what I wanted on the show." "And I just had fun, really." " You're working with them again now?" " Yeah, a sitcom called "Catterick", which is a really strange sitcom." "Vic and Bob play two brothers." "Bob's just got out of the army." "It's like a road movie, looking for Bob's son." "You both do things outside your partnership, like Phil Collins and Mike Rutherford." "Exactly like that!" "You were in "Cruise Of The Gods" with Coogan and Rob Brydon." "Working with Brydon again?" "We've been writing a sitcom together called "Home"." "We play two brothers who run an old people's home." "And when we were young I gave him my kidney and now I want it back." "Ronnie Corbett is our only male resident and he's the Hugh Hefner of the place." "He swans around, getting off with the women." "But we're just writing it at the moment." "And here's the exciting news" " David is going to be in the Christmas edition of "EastEnders"." " Thank you." " Not dressed as a woman." " Well, bottom half." " What are you playing?" "I'm playing Ray, a friend of Alfie Moon's." "I get roped into performing his marriage ceremony to Kat Slater." " We can't say that, can we?" " I don't know." "I've just said it." " I've done it, been paid." "What can they do?" " Screw 'em!" "You told me that Shane asked you about the doofter." "What is the doofter?" " He said, "You've got two doof-doofers."" " A doof-doofer?" "A doof-doofer is, "Doof-doof-doof, do-do-doof!" I say at the end of the first episode," ""Does anyone have reason why these two cannot be joined together?" Doof-doof-doof!" "I was playing the drums!" "Wouldn't that be great if they panned round the Queen Vic and you're dressed as the baby?" "Congratulations for David in advance, whether he wins or not, at this week's British Comedy Awards." " You're nominated as Best Newcomer." " Yeah." "You can sort it out for me." "I would like to." "No matter who's won it, I'll read your name out." " Thank you very much." " What happens with "Little Britain" now?" "Is there another one planned?" "We'll do another series for the same time next year." "Do you wait and see which characters work for the audience or go with what you like doing?" "A bit of both, really." "We respond to what people like." "Vicky Pollard." "People seem to like Emily and Lou and Andy." "So, yeah, they'll be back." "I love Dafydd, the only gay in the village." "David and Matt have both been to my house." "The kids love your show." " They're very fond of you, David." " Thank you." "Matt, they didn't meet you." "I said, "We had both fellas from 'L ittle Britain' round."" "Harvey said, "Was the only gay in the village there?" So he was delighted he'd been there." " How old is your son?" " He's nine." "Bit worrying." " I've forgotten what I was going to say." " Congratulate me on my success?" "Wishing you luck on the series, good luck for Wednesday" " I don't know if you've won." " You do." " I don't know!" " Whatever." "Go on, tell me." " All right!" "You've lost!" "This is the face I'm practising when they read out who the winner is." "I am so thrilled the show did well for you." "You are two of the nicest fellas I've met recently." " Oh, come on!" " No doubt about it." "I love you." "Ladies and gentlemen, join me in saying thank you to Mr David Walliams and Matt Lucas." "(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)" " Thank you very much." " OK." "Get off!" "Go on." "Get off!"