"Three and a half weeks, two continents, five countries, one island, about 9, 000 miles, and I was wasted." "Right now I was looking forward to miles and miles of nothing happening except sleep." "Welcome home!" "No." "Oh, the man's overcome with emotion." "No, just overcome." "It's nice to be back, great to see you, but I need to get some sleep." "Now." "Not so fast." "I have fantastic news." "I don't want to hear it, Jack." "I just want to sleep." "So goodbye, Jack." "Go home, Jack." "Actually, this is home." "Temporarily." "A reversal of fortune, pileup of evil coincidences." "I knew you wouldn't mind, so I sort of moved in." "Lucky I did too because, old buddy, best pal, we have hit the jackpot." "I taped this with my own lily whites, from the 1 1.00 news." "Jack!" "The answer is no." "No rescue missions, no buried treasure, no sunken gold, no oil wells." " No." " You're right, MacGyver." "You're a practical man." "You're gonna love this." "Jack, I don't want to see anything." " Please." " I just taped the high points." "And here they are, the Lupescu jewels." "Emeralds, rubies, diamonds." "The most famous relics of a royal family, purchased earlier today at the Warwick Auction for $32 million." "The reported buyer is one of the world's wealthiest women, Elena Iturbe, heiress to a shipping fortune and alleged to be the mysterious purchaser of these fabulous treasures." "What?" "No!" "Oh, I just taped over some old movie." "My classic Western collection!" "Oh, sorry." "Forget the past because, my boy, we have a future." "With those royal jewels?" " No." " Of course, no." "Never mind small things." "We have a future with Ms Elena Iturbe." "She flew in for that auction, used some petty cash to buy those pretties." "The pilots of her private jet went south." "I don't want to hear this." "I checked it out at the airport." "Kosher, A-OK." " The plane's there." "We're signed up." " What about her flight crew?" "Lost, strayed, stolen." "Who cares?" "We, old buddy, are on." "Jack, I just got off an aeroplane." " No!" " It's more than a job." "It's an opportunity." "We talked about starting an airline, small at first, growing, building it into something." " Air Dalton." " Yeah." "It's my dream, all I ever wanted in the world." "Jack..." "I know I pulled you into hassles." "You've bailed me out, I owe you." "Our friendship's worth something." "The Iturbe money is real." "The lady is real." "It's legit." "Oh!" "Oh!" "It's her." "Oh, come on." "Come with me." "Just one fun trip to Toulon, France." "Excuse me." " Hello, Ms Iturbe." " Captain Dalton." " Come right in." " Thank you." "You must be MacGyver." " Elena Iturbe." " It's a pleasure." "What a charming place you have here, Captain Dalton." "Glad you like it." "We're ready to leave." "I filed flight plans." " Good." " Ms Iturbe, about this..." "I'm most happy to have you aboard." "Captain Dalton has told me a great deal about you." "I'm all packed." " I'll get the plane warmed up." " Good." "Miss Iturbe, I'm Simon Warwick." "It's a privilege to meet you in person." "Thank you." "I imagine you wish to see my identity." "Hardly necessary." " Do you have everything prepared?" " Of course." "Your attorneys approved the sale contract." "It's not their money, nor their jewels." "May I see them, please?" "Yes." "Quite correct." "Designed for a queen." "Fitting, for a princess." "Thank you." "Goodbye, Mr Warwick." "Can I help you with that?" "The jewels?" "They're not heavy." "Beautiful, but not heavy." "Did you see them on television?" " Oh, yeah." " And what did you think?" "I think it's kind of a flashy way of telling people you're rich." " You don't approve?" " Probably just jealous." " Ready for immediate takeoff." " Good." " Stop!" " Thieves!" "Get out of here, Jack!" "That's my boy." "Up, up and away." "Oh, you were both marvellous!" "I have a radiophone in my cabin." "I'll notify the authorities." "Dalton, MacGyver, thank you." "Air Dalton lives!" "Dalton is asleep." "Well, it's my shift." "He might as well." "He trusts you." "And you trust him." "That was obvious from the way you two worked together to handle those thieves." "Especially in defence of a woman of whom you don't really approve." " Now what gave you that idea?" " Oh, you made it quite clear." "And Dalton told me about you." "Apparently, you would rather give $32 million to medical research." "Yeah." "But then that's probably why you own the plane, and I'm just flying it." "We'll be landing in a few hours." "What then?" "Oh, I shall probably go into my wine cellar and choose a bottle of truly exceptional champagne and sit on my terrace and congratulate myself on my acquisition." "What are you going to do with those jewels?" "Wear them, exhibit them, sell them for a profit, anything I choose." "You would probably give them to a campaign for hunger." "Yeah." "And save a few lives?" "For what?" "Six months?" "A year?" "Until they breed more starving children and the money runs out, then what?" "Then you'd have bought another year." "You can do a lot in a year." "As you said, it is my money." "You know, my grandfather used to say," ""If you're afraid of the answer, don't ask the question."" "Notify me when we make the landing approach." "I've arranged to be met." "Yes, ma'am." "There she is, Toulon, France." "Better ask Miss Iturbe if she needs any help." "Hi." "Thought I'd let you know we'll be landing in about five minutes." "Good." "I've arranged to be met." "I'm anxious to avoid the press, which will be waiting for me like a pack of wolves." " Hello?" " Robert, it's Elena Iturbe here." "We are landing in Toulon now." "Very good." "The helicopter will be there in five minutes." "Merci." "Take the plane to the terminal and check it in." "Then go to the Metropole Hotel, and I will contact you there." "Will do." "Here they come." "I anticipate champagne, flashbulbs and, with any luck, local beauty queens panting after my highly trained pilot's body." "Bonjour!" "I guess you're expecting us." "Yes, we were." "You are under arrest." "Excuse me, but do you know who we are?" "Yes." "Two American thieves." "And I am Inspector Andres." "And where is the woman?" "Elena Iturbe?" "No, Mr MacGyver." "Miss Iturbe, the real Elena Iturbe, has been discovered in her hotel suite, in your country, bound and gagged, with her real flight crew, her passport and papers stolen by your accomplice." "Where is she?" "Where are the jewels?" "Hey, wait." "Hold it." "Momentito, s'il vous plait." "Miss Iturbe hired us." "And if you're trying to run some hustle..." "Jack!" "Shush." "Inspector, what Jack means is, we were under the impression the woman we were working for was Ms Iturbe." " You expect me to believe that?" " Yeah." "You used a woman who resembled Miss Iturbe to commit a brilliant robbery." "My congratulations." "Look, with all due respect, maybe if we talked to your superior..." "This is my investigation." "When I recover the Lupescu jewels, I can expect a promotion." "Perhaps a medal." "And I have no intention of sharing this opportunity." "Then as an American citizen, I demand a call to my embassy." "There are no Americans here." "Only prisoners." "They are truly stunning." "You did a fantastic job, Liane." "Or should I call you Elena?" "Thank God that's over." "But it was almost a disaster." "I had to hire a pair of pilots at one day's notice." " What do you mean?" " The two you hired didn't show up." "I apologise, Liane." "How did you find replacements?" "I used my contacts." "I found Jack Dalton." "He flew the U.S.-Mexican border, bit of smuggling, but nothing serious." "He had his papers and his passport, and he was hungry." "Resourceful." "And his copilot?" "He brought in a friend, MacGyver." "A sort of soldier of fortune, I gather." " I'll check them out." " But what about the buyers?" "Coming in later today." "Bulging with cash" " and ready to bid." " How much do you think we'll get?" "A lot." "Listen to me." "Would thieves file a flight plan?" "Show him in immediately." "You can explain from the beginning to Mr Brosz," "Miss Iturbe's head of security." "Excellent, all he has to do is listen to reason." "So these are the men who attacked us when we tried to retrieve the jewels?" "You even eluded Miss Iturbe's security at the airport." "I see." "I see!" "No, it was a big misunderstanding." " We thought..." " Enough!" "Take them to the interrogation centre." "Inspector, Miss Iturbe is a very influential and gracious lady." "She's only interested in recovering the jewels." "Not in any methods you may find it necessary to take." " Do we understand each other?" " Completely." " 'Morning, Helen." " 'Morning." " Has MacGyver called in yet?" " Not since I've been in." "But there's a message blinking on your private line." "And no, I didn't listen in." "Thanks a lot." "Hi, Pete." "I'm calling early, but I wanted to make sure you got this." "So do me a favour, will you?" "Sit down." "Thanks." "Pete, something came up, and I..." "Well, I sort of took off, with Jack." "Dalton?" "!" "Pete?" "Sit down." "This is completely legitimate." "He is nothing but trouble." "I know, he is nothing but trouble, but this is really important to him." "We've hired on to ferry Ms Elena Iturbe back to Toulon, France, in her private jet." "Jack needed a copilot, and I was kind of elected." "I didn't figure you'd miss me." "I'll be back tomorrow." " What?" "!" " So don't worry." "And it's a real big shot for Jack." "This is his big chance." " After, Dalton Airlines will take off." " What are you involved in?" "Don't get all shook up." "Just relax." "Dalton." "Dalton!" "Helen!" "Yes, sir?" "Get me on the first available flight for T oulon, France." "Yes, sir." "Dalton!" "She looked the part." "She had Elena Iturbe's passport." " Why wouldn't we believe her?" " Be quiet." "Stupidity irritates me." "I have three dozen men out searching for your female accomplice." "But I'm not going to waste the time." "You are going to lead me to her." "Do you know what this is?" "Sure, that's electrical shock torture." "Put a bunch of voltage through a human body." "It's usually against the law." "It is also very painful." "You burn internally." "Sometimes bones break in convulsions." " Not pleasant." " No, you can't!" "I mean, it's crazy!" "Torture's illegal." "I can't stand pain." "What do you want me to say?" " The truth is, he conned me into it!" " You gutless, whining little wimp!" "Right now!" " Care to dance?" " No, thanks." "Taxi!" "So how do we get out of this country?" "We don't." "We're crooks until we square with the police, which means we should get a line on those jewels." "MacGyver, we're wanted criminals, we broke out of a torture chamber by slugging an inspector and the head of security for the richest woman in the universe." "We got no choice." "Either we're innocent, or we're dead." "There's a third way." "This place has to be full of folks who don't like les cops." "Maybe we could hire some help." "What, local crooks?" "And stay on the wanted list?" " Forget it." " We don't know the territory." "We don't know this con woman's real name." "We don't know where she..." "What?" "Your light just went on." "Give." "The police already eliminated a lot of territory, and we know things they don't." "Like she took off in a chopper and is probably in Sweden or Africa?" "It's not likely." "That chopper took off and reached us at the runway here in exactly five minutes." "Figure air speed of 1 20 miles per, it came a little less than ten miles which means it took off from..." "along this line." "OK, it's not Sweden, but it's still a lot of territory." "Yeah." "But we know it came in south by southwest, so we trace back north by northeast intersects... here." "There's a church and a winery." "Oh, I shall probably go into my wine cellar and choose a bottle of truly exceptional champagne..." "Winery." "Winery." "What is it?" ""I'll go to the cellars and choose a fine bottle of champagne and congratulate myself."" "She's got to be here." "Looks like at least two armed guards on duty." "OK, so I guess knocking on the front door is out." "Let's try this way." " Take a look." " Alarm system?" "There might be more." "This guy's kind of nervous for a lousy 32 mil in hot ice." "Let's go one at a time, and be careful." "Oh, no!" "No, rabbit." "Stay, stay, wait!" "Oh, stop." "Stay." "No, back!" "Get back!" "Stay." "No, you...!" "Stop right there!" "MacGyver, I presume." "Search for the other one." " Dalton." " Who, Jack?" "Jack's long gone." "He's gone for help." "We'll see about that." " Come." "Get him inside." " Let's go." "Let's go." "You owe me one." "Mr Russell, welcome." "This is my associate, Liane Auber." "Pleasure." "Your deception was very clever." " Thank you." " Would you care to step inside, sir?" "Look, inspector, I came here because I know MacGyver." "I'm a friend of his." "And he's no thief." "Somehow he's been framed." "The evidence is overwhelming, Mr Thornton." "Besides, we are not certain of either criminal's identity." "They had no passports." "The descriptions you have match MacGyver and Dalton perfectly." "They're criminals, Mr Thornton." "My advice is that you return to the United States." "Not until I see them..." "with a lawyer." "When we capture these criminals, we shall have to establish identities." "Question them." "It might be months before they are allowed to see an attorney." "We'll see about that." "Mr Thornton." "Look, I know who you are, but this is a criminal case in my jurisdiction." "Any interference, political or otherwise, and I'll have you deported immediately." " Is that clear?" " Oh, yes." "Very." "Thank you for your courtesy." "MacGyver!" "How did he find us?" "And where is Dalton?" " Two excellent questions." " He knows." "I think we shall cut some answers out of our Mr MacGyver." "What are you talking about?" "Torture." "He's talking about torture." "No." "We had an agreement." "The Iturbe woman loses money she can afford to." "But nobody gets hurt, and nobody gets killed." " I like that." " Quiet." "Or what?" "You'll blow his head off?" "No." "Let me make myself absolutely clear." "There is to be no killing." "I will not stand for it." "You won't?" "So we just pack up and leave?" "No, Liane." "I'm content here." "I'm a respectable landowner, with a staff that's loyal." "I only have two small areas of risk." "Our Mr MacGyver here and now you." "I'm your partner." "I think I just bought you out." " Nothing else to say?" " Would talking be of any use?" "No." "When my auction is over, we will finish this." "Goodbye..." "Liane." "Position René at the top of the stairs." "I want no one to come down here." "Immediately, Monsieur Donnay." "All right, I was stupid." "For coming to my rescue?" "I kind of appreciate that, actually." "Nevertheless, stupid." "Look, we're not dead." "We've got time to figure a way out of here, and Jack will be back." "Oh, Dalton?" "He's an ex-smuggler with the ethics of a weasel." "Yeah." "But he's still my friend." "Donnay called you Liane, is it?" "Liane Auber." "I believe in honesty at least when I'm contemplating my own death." "Look, we're gonna get out of here." "Oh." "With some help from your friend Jack?" "I doubt it." "You know, I suppose I can understand that." "Your friend plans to kill you." "My friend plans to save me." "Look, I'll tell you what I'm gonna do." "I'll write you a personal cheque." "Drawn on an American bank." "It's better than cash." "All yours, for one job." "Help a friend of mine out of a minor misunderstanding." " No." " All right, I'll tell you what." "I'll throw in a cash bonus." "After the job." " Why don't we do it?" " Are you crazy?" "Let's go." "Hey!" "Mon ami." "My friend." " Can I talk to you?" " Sure." "Mr Brizard." "Welcome." " Thank you." " Do come inside." "MacGyver... what are you doing?" "If I can get my hands wet, maybe I can wiggle out of this." " Thank you." " Welcome." "Let's go." " But we are still prisoners." "Locked in." " We better work on that." "There is a man with a gun guarding that door." "Maybe we should consider a different way out." "That door is steel." "It is cross-braced and double locked." "I never said it was gonna be easy." "Could you help me?" "3,500, 4,000, 4,500, 5,000, right?" " Anytime." " You!" " You had me slugged!" " No, as a matter of fact, I didn't." "But it's not a bad thought." "What I did was put out a reward to have you brought in." "Oh, I'm touched." "Matter of fact, I'm bruised." "Don't tell me." "You're a secret Mediterranean crime boss." "No, what I am is a guy with a few connections in this area." "I used to run a DXS operation here." "And you know what you are?" "Trouble." "Now, where is MacGyver?" "Well actually, he's..." "he's being held prisoner." "Prisoner?" "Prisoner?" "!" "I knew it." "I knew it!" "Jack, having you as a friend is a little bit like owning a pet disease." "Are you trying to hint you're upset?" "Upset?" "Why would I be upset?" "Because you've done it again?" "One more time, you have conned him into bailing you out of something." "Now he's the one that was deep-sixed." "Probably in a bed of quicksand." "Actually, it's a winery." "He's there with the Lupescu jewels." "A place called the Domaine Donnay." " I know the place." " Domaine Donnay?" "All right." "Now we're getting someplace." "We learned the diamonds were up for sale, and three heavyweight buyers are coming into Toulon to bid on them." "We couldn't find out where it was gonna take place." " All you had to do was ask." " It makes for logic, Peter." "The buyers cross the border legitimately, as wine merchants." " Can you find them?" " It might be difficult." " Money's no object." " Jack!" "In that case, two of them have already checked out of their hotels." "You didn't tell me that." "You didn't mention that money was no object." "The third buyer is one August Bauman, from Munich, staying at the Hotel Toulonaise, suite 31 7." " Who is it?" " Assistant manager, Herr Bauman." "A case of wine has arrived for you, from Monsieur Donnay." "Oh?" "You must be a very close friend." "Actually, I have never met him." "But we are to do business together." " Champagne." " Only the best for you." "Here it is." ""Herr August Bauman."" "Oh, boy." "He's due at Domaine Donnay in less than an hour." " We can get there in 20 minutes." " Yeah, and do what?" "Well, bust in, find Mac, you know." "How many guards were there?" "I saw... five." "Yeah, five." "Figure more." "No, we can't break in." "We've got to get in somehow." "We've got to sneak in." "Disguised as what?" "Mother Theresa and a leper?" " Sorry." " No." "I go in." "As Herr August Bauman." "The third buyer." "Great thought." "Except I'm the one that has to do it." "This needs style, finesse." "A certain, je ne sais quoi." "It needs someone the girl hasn't seen, hasn't described and can't recognise." "And someone the police won't shoot on sight." "Yeah, but..." "You're right." "I'm going as the chauffeur." "What's the plan?" "All right." "I play Bauman." "I get us past their security." "Oh, my God." "I'm gonna have to trust you." "I'll keep the bidding going as long as I can." "You find MacGyver and get him out." "Gotcha." "Herr Donnay?" "Bauman." " Shall we get down to business?" " Certainly." "This way." "Gentlemen..." "Herr August Bauman." " You're late." " I don't know you." "This is Mr David Russell, Mr Jacques Brizard." "How very interesting." "I prefer that we waste no more time." " So?" " Very well." "Gentlemen, this way." "Johann... you will remain here." "Are you certain this will work?" "Nope." "But when you release gas under pressure, you're using one of the basic laws of physics." "For every action there's an equal and opposite reaction." "But what about this thing?" "It must weigh, what, 1,000 kilograms?" "Yeah, you're right." "Haul over another nitrogen cylinder." "We need all the reaction we can get." "But what is the point of all this?" " There are four armed men outside." " It may be no point at all." "But if Jack's coming at them from outside, I want things equal inside." " You really think he will come?" " Oh, yeah." "Yeah." "Straight ahead, if you will, for our little auction." "Here?" "Twelve-inch-thick stone walls." "One door." "No security risks, gentlemen." "To protect... these." "The terms... cash." "They are truly beautiful." " Delivery guaranteed." " How?" "You will receive a shipment of wine, through normal legal channels." "Concealed inside... the jewels." " Undetectable." " Very efficient." "Good." "One last point." "The bidding, U.S. dollars." "Commencing, ten million." "Robert, see to it that Herr Bauman's man is comfortable." "Gentlemen." "Monsieur... what are you doing?" "I have $25 million in cash." "Makes me nervous." " Twenty-five million dollars?" " Yeah." "Don't worry." "We have complete security." "An alarm system and armed men on patrol." "Security?" "Your boss told my boss that you had a break-in earlier today." "We caught him." "He's under guard in the wine cellar." "In the wine cellar?" "Down there?" "Good, that makes me feel better." "Have you ever seen $25 million in cash?" "Never." "Show me." " Twelve million dollars." " Twelve million five." " Thirteen." " Fifteen million." " Seventeen." " Ridiculous." "Oh?" "Then they are mine?" "No." "Eighteen million." "I'm out of it." " Twenty million." " Gentlemen... take your time." "Think about Herr Bauman's bid." "Oh, yes." "Take all the time you like." "Wake up!" "All right, we have to knock off these valves, simultaneously." "Come on." "I should have knocked." "Jack, I'm glad it's you." "MacGyver!" "And the ever-lovely Elena Iturbe or whatever." " Oh, it's nice to see you again." " She's with us, Jack." "She's agreed to testify against Donnay." "Let's move before somebody checks on us." "Never fear." "Pete's with Donnay at this moment, buying us time." " Pete?" " He heard we got our tails in a crack, he came running." "He's one of the auction buyers." "I was supposed to find you." "Which I did..." "...brilliantly." " In God's name, can we go?" " Where'd he go?" " To tell Donnay Pete's an impostor." "Let's use this thing to get out of here." " And leave Pete here?" " No way." "Where's this auction?" "In the wine-tasting room, the other side of that wall." "Give me a hand." "Easy." "Twenty-two million, five hundred thousand." "This is insane." "I'm finished." "Going... going... gone." "He's not Bauman." "He's a fake." "He came with the other one, Dalton." "Relax, gentlemen." "Dalton?" "I locked him in with MacGyver and the girl." "They're not going anywhere." "Well..." "I guess this means you're not gonna sell me the jewels." " So..." " Very amusing." "I don't think so." "Kill him now, let's get on with business." " Yes." " I agree." "Goodbye, Mr Bauman." "You know, gentlemen I don't think you really want to do this." "Especially not..." "in front of witnesses." "But, sir, we are all accomplices here." "Yeah, I hadn't actually thought of it that way." "Well, certainly going to make a mess of the jewels, aren't we?" "Yes." "We wouldn't want your blood splattered all over the jewels, would we?" " That's it." " I hope this will work." "Yeah, me too." "Stand back." "On three." "One... two three!" "Go!" "Go!" "Now, Robert." "Let's go!" "Stop!" " Sorry to bust in on you like this." " What kept you?" "Hey, are we great or what?" "What a team." "Since we're here, I heard about this sunken treasure." "Fifty million dollars in Nazi gold." "The ship was torpedoed, and the gold was lost." "All we got to do is get a diving bell and three bathing suits..."