"Today is a good day to die." " What's happening?" " It's crack." "Get some help." "Crackheads take up all our time." " What have we got?" " Hemmorage." " Vaginal bleeding." " Probably a street abortion." " We've got to open her up." " All the O. R. 's are full." " We can't wait." "I'll operate." " You can't!" "Just do it!" "Get him out of here." "15 years on the job and you're gonna get me canned in one day." "Here we go." "Forceps!" "Where is it?" "Clamp!" " You got her." " All right, I've got her." "Dave, get out of here." "Now!" "Iabraccio!" "What the hell are you doing?" "Randall Steckle, "Diary of a Surgeon. " No." "Randall Steckle, "Diary of a Surgeon to be. "" "Randall Steckle, "Making of a ... "" ""Forging of a Surgeon. " No, pretentious." "Randall Steckle, "Genesis"?" ""Genesis of a Young Surgeon. " Brilliant!" "Morning." "Nice work." "Keep it up." "Suddenly, even though I was in a coma, I saw myself." "Suddenly, even though I was in a coma, I saw myself." "like, from above, looking down." "Ralph, my husband, was crying." "The doctor was saying I was dying." "I saw myself in the bed and everything." "I started to float out into the hall." "Then into this tunnel toward this light." "It was the most beautiful light I ever saw." "I heard this voice." "It was the most beautiful voice I ever heard." "And it said:" ""I'm going to take your baby. "" ""But you are going back. "" "And I woke up, and there was Ralph and the doctor." "I was legally dead for 41/2 minutes." "But I didn't see no tunnel and I didn't see no light." "I did ... and it was so beautiful !" " I was in this garden ..." " This tunnel and this light ..." "Then this guide ..." "and a chariot and music." "Terry, I think they'd better get you off medication." "Thanks." " What's up?" " Good morning." "There's trouble in E. R. You'd better watch your ass." "Why are you always asking the patients about death?" "I'll be late for class." "Thanks, Edna." "The spoils of arthritis." "Some rather resilient inflammatory tissue here." "We're now under the transverse arch of the foot." "The metatarsals ..." "Brilliant, Dr. Steckle." "Bring all that talent with you tonight." "Nelson, about tonight." "I like you." "I have to decline on moral grounds." "There enough atrocity in the world without your own little horror." "It's ignorance we fear." "When did truth and knowledge become a horror?" "Especially to a scientist and a genius like yourself." " How are you doing, Mannus?" " Fine." "I've been meaning to ask you, are you dating anyone?" " Identify." " Costodiaphragmatic recess." "Is it offensive if I make conversation?" "Sometimes it's nice to open up." "Like old Lenny here, he's open." " Identify." " Pylorus." "I've heard all the rumours and nicknames about you, Rachel." "I'm sure you're a very warm woman." "Not in the least bit repressed." " Identify." " Your brains." "You want to come over to my place?" "Dr. Hurley, I need a word with Dr. Mannus." " I already said no to this." " Steckle and Hurley are in." "Two of the top GPA's in the school." "I need you to handle the injections and the I ." "V." "I have no interest in watching you kill yourself." "I think you do." "Good morning, class." "Today's exam will be scaled." "Three A's will be given, five B's and ten C's." "The remaining four will get D's and F's." "As in life, you're competing not with me, yourself or this exam,   but with each other." "There are a lot of others who'd like to make a name for themselves." "It's a shame that the people with the ability don't have the nerve." " All right, we'll be there." " Speak for yourself, Joseph." "Sure, it'll be dramatic, Nelson." "You'll cry or faint, puke at best." "But then what?" "I don't think you have the balls." "You just bring the equipment." "I'll bring my balls." "Did you hear about Labraccio?" "Dave, it's a four-month suspension." "It won't affect your scholarship." "Forget it, I'm out of here." "You're the best they've ever had." "They won't let you walk away." " Besides, you were wrong." " No, damn it!" "She was dying." "I saved her life." "What would you have done?" "They have to make an example out of you to protect their insurance bond." "They'll take you back next term." "It doesn't matter." "I'd do the same thing again." "I know you would." "That's why I need you there tonight." "There are a few people I'd like to kill, but you're not one of them." "I don't want to die." "I want to come back with the answers to death ... and life." "I can get there with the others   but I need you." "I need you to bring me back." "Please." "I'm sorry, man, I can't do that." "Just walk away, Dave." "Go climb a mountain." "I don't understand you any more." "You burn your career on a stranger." "Now you turn your back on a friend." "look, I'm real sorry about what happened today." " I won't make it back without you." " So don't do it." "Dave ..." "What if it works?" "I don't want to be buried on Saturday." "It costs $150 more to be buried on Saturday." "Mrs. Amsler, you're doing much better." "{Y:bi}leave a message after the beep." "{Y:bi}I know you're home." " Don't be late." "Bring the camera." " What camera?" " Thank God he called a specialist." " No lectures, okay?" "You're engaged." "Grow up." "I'm recording a few last adventures before resigning myself to monogamy." "I didn't realise." "I thought you were just a pussy marauder." "What the hell are we doing here?" "This is goodbye med-school." "Ten bucks says he shits his drawers and we're out of here." "Not those lights." "Security will come running." "Set up over the grate." "I just got the boiler going." " You're really going to do this?" " Just humour the man." "Take me down with nitrous, sodium pentathol and a cold blanket." "I've got some chilled D5W." "When my temperature is 86% , hit me with 200 joules." "The shock will stop my heart." "Then take my mask off." " You said Rachel was coming." " Steckle, shut the door." "You handle the injections." "When the EEG flatlines, the brain is dead." "I'll be exploring." "Give me 30 seconds." "Set the blanket to warm and take me up to 93% ." "Inject 1cc of adrenalin, and Joe, come in with the defibs." " You bring me back to life." " With brain damage." "Resembling in many ways ..." "a Cabbage Patch doll." "Not with a body temperature of 86% ." "Dr. Mannus, will you handle the injections?" "Wait a minute." "Quite simply, why are you doing this?" "To see if there's anything beyond death." "Philosophy failed." "Religion failed." "Now it's up to physical science." "Mankind deserves to know." "You're doing this for mankind?" "This letter absolves you of any responsibility." "This isn't for mankind." "You want to get on "60 Minutes"   sandwiched between Andy Rooney and the commercials." ""Tonight, a medical student who experienced death and came back. "" " Fame is inevitable." " That's the wrong reason." "Dr. Hurley, electrodes." "Don't you want to be on "60 Minutes"?" "Rachel, how about a little nitrous?" "At least I'll go out with a laugh." "Dr. Hurley, get the blanket." "We're all professionals." "I'm sure this'll go very smoothly." "Can I have your apartment?" " It's a joke!" " One minute." "Don't be late." "Start filming now." "You'll have a complete record of the experiment." "Promise me you'll go through with this." "One little kiss goodbye." "I'll see you soon." " 96% ." " This letter doesn't mean shit." "let him sleep." "He'll have a wet dream and think he went to heaven." " Now I know why I'm here." " I've stated my feelings, goodbye." "Are you willing to risk your future for Nelson's fame?" "Someone's coming !" " Is he dead?" " He's only sleeping." "Talk some sense into these people." "I'll do it." "I've got nothing to lose." " Just his life!" " I can get him back." " Just stop his heart for a minute." " Don't think I couldn't have." "No!" " Clear." " What are you doing?" " A systole." " You're killing him." " No wonder you got tossed." " Stop this shit." "I did not come to medical school to murder my classmates!" "Flatline." "They're getting smaller." "He's dying." " Brain death." "Now it's real." " Start filming." "He's dead, isn't that enough?" "Let me try to bring him back." " Just watch the door." " We're in the room with a dead man." " One minute to go." " Start filming !" " 30 seconds to go." " Okay, let's heat him up." " 20 seconds. 89% , 90% ..." " Sodium bicarbonate ready." "I'm charging the paddles." "Monitor the EKG." " Body temp:93% ." " Here we go." " What have we got?" " Not a goddamn thing." "Up me to 300." "Begin CPR." "Sodium bicarbonate and eppy." "My God !" "Not a goddamn thing !" " 98% ." " Hit him again. 350." "Nothing." "Got him !" " Steckle, help me." " More eppy." "In." "We got REM ." " Nelson, can you hear us?" " Welcome back, man." " The crazy motherfucker did it!" " Jesus Christ!" "Steckle, that's some bedside manner." "You'll make one hell of a doctor." "Suck me." "Can you recall any specific emotion?" "Heat, cold, anything like that?" " You can't be specific." " Did you see a tunnel of light?" "No, but there is something out there." "It's comforting." "Have you any idea how big this is?" "He could use some air." "You guys could get us some fluids." " Thanks for saving my life." " It was so much fun." " How do you feel, wise one?" " Like a highly-tuned instrument." "Can you hear the traffic on the lake shore?" "Underneath that there's a hum." "It's the street lights." "Even fainter ..." "I can hear a kind of dragging sound." " And it's getting louder." " No." "I not only hear it, I can feel it." "Yeah, your prognosis is excellent." "You'll be great on "60 Minutes"." " It's bigger than that, David." " I'm sure you'll see to that." " You're not buying any of this." " You forgot ..." "I'm an atheist." "Are you all right for a few minutes?" " How's he doing?" " He thinks he's back from the dead." " How's he doing?" " He thinks he's back from the dead." " That's what we did, right?" " All we did was get lucky." " I would like to go next." " Yeah, I'd like to be famous, too." " It's not about fame." " They'll build monuments to you." " Small stone ones. "Rest in Peace. "" " I'm going next." "I'd be willing to go 1minute 20 seconds." "1:30." "Are you two so competitive that you're willing to bet your lives?" "1:30." "That's it then." "Not a bad price to pay for fame and glory." "Die to be a hero, but don't die to be a celebrity." "Champ?" " Someone ought to stay with him." " I will." "Are you okay?" "I'd like to go home." "Are you okay?" "You were hyperventilating." "Your blood pressure will rise   as your cardiovascular vessels constrict." " God, you're beautiful." " Get some rest." "I bet 24 hours ago you didn't think you'd be spending the night here." "You were lucky last night, Nelson." "Don't push it." "ENGAGEM ENT PARTY" "{Y:bi}I want to wish you two the best of everything together." "Hello, may I please speak to Anne Coldren?" "Anne?" "{Y:bi}Hi, I've been thinking about you." "How are you?" "Counting the days to Thanks giving break." "I've got to transfer to a school closer to you or get a faster car." " We should've married last summer." " My mother wasn't ready yet." "You know, you're the best." "If anything happens ..." " Joe, what's wrong?" " l don't know. I'm just tired." "I'm not making any sense." "I should go." " Joe, you're scaring me." " It's okay, nothing's wrong." "I love you." "Bye." " Nothing." " Starting CPR." " CPR and adrenalin, and nothing !" " What's going on?" "Come on, Joe!" " Come on, Nelson, let me try." " We're running out of time!" " Let me try." " I'm doing everything I can !" " Nelson, step back." " Come on, Joe!" "I got him." "Oxygen." "0xygen ready." "CPR successful." "Hurley lives." "It's okay, Joe." " It was great." " Here it comes." "Define "great"." "I don't know, it's not thinking about the past or the future." " It's difficult to explain." " Yeah, dying is funny that way." "Nelson's right, there definitely is activity beyond death." " Absolutely." " The experience was strange." " It was almost erotic." " He's dead and he gets laid." "What do you mean, erotic?" "I don't want you to think it was wantonly sexual." "No, that never would have occurred to me." "It was friendly." "It was something vaguely feminine guiding me." "This could be the conquest of our generation." "The last great frontier." "First you had the sea, then America, the West, the Moon   Mr. Leary, drugs, the inner journey ..." "Our former First Lady and the outer journey ..." " But this is ours!" " We did have disco." " Fuck the baby boomers." " Watch your mouth." " l found something." "Remember?" " I came back from the dead tonight." "It doesn't surprise me." "We had Elvis in here last night." "Pay when you're ready, okay?" " Was it difficult getting back?" " Not that I remember." "But you remember everything else?" "I think you guys are full of shit." " I'm not buying any of this." " I wouldn't buy it either   unless I'd been there." "So what about it, Dave?" " An atheist has nothing to lose." " I'm going next." "Nobody's going next." "You're looking for answers where there are none." "You just saw what you wanted to see." "Give it up." "It's too dangerous." "We can't turn back now." "I'm going further. 1:50." "Two minutes ..." "I changed my mind." "Two minutes." " 2:10." " 2:20." "It looks like we found a winner." "Enjoying yourself, Nelson?" "Joe ..." "Was there anything negative about your experience?" "No." "Nothing." "Good." " Hold on." " Was that your idea of chivalry?" " Were you trying to show me up?" " Not everything is about you." "Nobody seems to want me to go under." "I don't need your protection." "What do you need, Mannus?" "What do you think I need?" "When someone is as smart and driven as you are, and very beautiful,   it makes the rest of us very nervous." " Why did you change your mind?" " I'm the sceptic on this." "If I see there's nothing out there, there's no reason for us to go on." "How do you explain the similarity in death experiences?" "People from different cultures see the same things in the same order." "Maybe there's a hormone released by the brain at the time of death." "No, you're reaching." "What if you go and there is something out there?" " Then you can kill yourself, too." " I'm not going to kill myself." "I'm glad to hear that, Mannus." "I might miss you." " So why this obsession with death?" " It's just an interest." "A personal interest." "Goodnight." " Can I drive you home?" " No, thanks." "I didn't take the money." "I got the toaster, but too many appliances make you love me." "Right, Nelson?" "In the end, we all know what we've done." "Champ?" "Come here, Champ." "Come here, boy." "What are you doing here, kid?" "Are you all right?" "Are you okay?" "Are you lost?" "Halloween morning." "Rotting pumpkins, burning leaves,   black cats mating like rats in the alley." "It were as if we felt no fear." "As if we were already dead, and had nothing to lose by dying." "Because we lived life so well, and loved life so much,   we imagined ourselves immortal." "Overwhelming the powers that be with our passion for science." "Or maybe we were fucked in the head." "Hey, I'm Joe Hurley." "You're Terry, right?" " You had a near-death experience." " I don't want to talk about it." "Wait a minute." "I had a near-death experience also." "I need someone to talk to." "This thing changed my life." " At first, they didn't believe me." " What the hell do they know?" "If you have to go to class, maybe we can discuss it one night this week?" "All that day I knew something was going to happen." "I've always had premonitions." "Once, my aunt was to fly ..." "{Y:bi}Why did you do this to me, Joe?" "No!" "Trick or treat." "It's Halloween." "There's a full moon." "Aren't we pushing it a little bit?" "I'm sorry I'm late." "I ran into some very big guys." " Let me take a look at it." " I'm fine." " Where the hell have you been?" " I don't feel well." "Look at you." "Just worry about your camera." "Nice outfit." " Are you ready?" " I'm ready." "Who are you supposed to be?" "Boner Man?" " 2:20, don't forget." " You just hurry up and get back." "You can buy us breakfast." "Don't let go of the rope." "{Y:bi}Hoka hey." "See you soon." "20 cc's sodium pentathol in." " 86% ." " 200 joules charged." "Clear." "Flatline." "What hangs in the air palpably?" "ls it hope, or the fear of death?" " Shut up, Steckle." " No, you shut up!" "What if he didn't make it back?" "Would you miss him, Rachel?" "One minute." " 90% ." " Give him another five seconds." " Why not ten?" "We've got the time." " Are you serious?" "{Y:bi}Joey, I trusted you." " Stations." "Joe, move yourself." " Come on, no kidding around here." "Who's kidding?" " What's going on here?" " 92% ." "Joe, get it!" "Come on. 2:15, 2:16, 2:17, 2:18 ... 2:20." "Hand it over." "This is my lab. 300 joules." "Charged." "Clear." "Breathe!" " 1,000, 2,000 ..." "What comes next?" " Knock it off, Nelson !" " 5,000." "Breathe." " 300 joules charged." "Clear." "Come on, Dave." " That's it!" " That's not it." "It's a v-fib!" " Try lidocaine." " Not yet." " Come on, Dave." " Raise it to 360." "Clear." " Try lidocaine." " Three fucking minutes." "Starting CPR." "Joe, keep filming." "I'm going to bring him back." "{Y:bi}You lied to me, Joe." " We've got him." " 1mg eppy in." "That was close." "That was way too close." " Hoka hey." " What did you say?" "{Y:bi}Hoka hey." "It's the war cry of the Sioux Indians." "It means ..." ""Today is a good day to die. " So was it, Dave?" "I don't know if I was dead." "I may have felt something." "A dream ... or just a bunch of stuff stored up inside my mind." "You were brain-dead." "Some electrical current circulating through my body ..." "It would've shown up on the EEG." "You were dead." "So what happened?" "It's hard to verbalise." "It's like being paranoid without the fear." "like being watched." "You guys were standing over me." " Who could be watching?" " The dead." "The sceptic did feel something." "I'm going again." " No way!" "I've been bumped twice." " Four minutes." " Labraccio went for 3:50." " That was a mistake." " Under four minutes is pointless." " Nobody is going for four minutes!" " 4:25." " 5 minutes." " I'm next or I'm out for good." " It'll be hard without her." " But without me ..." " Or me." "Well, mutiny at last." "I trusted you with a brilliant idea." "It was the chance of a lifetime." " Give it a rest, Nelson." " None of you had my foresight!" "Rachel, you want to go next?" "Be my guest, but this was my idea!" "You're tourists!" "I would've gone 3:30 or 3:40." "I still might." "But 4:25 is crazy." "We're pushing the five-minute mark." "It's dangerous." "{Y:bi}You shit, Joe." "{Y:bi}You said you loved me, Joe." " l love you, Joe." " Buddy?" "Skelator, are you listening to me?" "Thanks for staying." "I'm on the early shift." "You seem fine." "I'll see you later." " About tonight ..." " Don't try to talk me out of it." "Why are you doing this?" "I've lost people that are close to me." "I want to make sure they've gone to a good place." "Is that so trivial?" "To tell you the truth, it's the best reason I've heard yet for going." "There's something I didn't tell you about last night." "I had this feeling that if I had gone any further   that there was something out there protecting me." "Something good." " So you don't need to go under." " The atheist now believes in God?" "I'm trying to tell you that I don't want you to do it." "Think about all we'll have to talk about ... when you bring me back." "I'm dying." "Don't lie to me." "I'm dying." "Don't lie to me." "Mrs. Amsler, you've fought well." " Sometimes we just have to let go." " That's what the voices say." " What voices?" " They say, "Have you done enough? "" ""Have you told everyone you love them? "" "I have." "They're friendly voices." "They're telling you what you need to know." " What?" " That you have someplace to go." " Do you believe that?" " Yes, I do." "Yes, I do." "Hey, fellatio!" "Got a match?" "Well, I do." "Your face and my ass." " Your breath and a buffalo fart." " Do I know you?" "You don't know jack shit!" "Butt-wad, needle-dick, cock-bite,   jack-off, limp-wrist,   banana-breath, shit-bird, bird-turd, turd-face,   kiss-ass, brown-nose, macho-wimp, limp-dick!" "What's the matter?" "Gonna cry?" "Cry-baby Davie." "Shit-faced, rat-turd, ass-licking, son of a bitch." " How did it happen?" " I was playing hockey." " About last night ..." " It's okay." " No-show Labraccio." " That's not like him." " It's his way of trying to stop me." " It's not a good idea to continue." " We don't need David." " Can you do this?" " Can you trust me?" " No, but let's do it anyway." "Nitrous on." "See you soon." "How long's she been under?" "We're bringing her back." " She hasn't been under long enough." " Just do it, Joe." "Don't expect any kisses for this." " Aborting fourth experiment." "Why?" " Why don't you ask Dr. Death?" " What's going on?" " We're bringing Rachel back early." " Drop it." "Think about Rachel." " Joe's right. 91% ." "Let's be ready." "Rachel, don't go in there." "{Y:bi}I told you not to do that." "Denny!" "It's your fault!" " Nothing." " Take me up to 300." "Come on, Rachel." "300 joules." "Clear!" " Got her!" "." " V-fib." "We don't have her." " It's okay, we'll get her." " Step me up to 360." " What did you do to me?" " A short, maybe a circuit." " Joe, you charged the battery?" " Shit!" "Starting CPR." "Bag her, Steckle." "No pulse." " It's not working." "Joe, take over." " She's been under 4 minutes." "We're moving to bretylium." "It's the only way." "Don't do it, you'll fry her." "Nelson !" "Please, don't!" "You'll bring her back?" "Come on, Mannus." "Iidocaine in." "Come on back to us." "Come on." "Wait!" "I heard something." "Oxygen !" "She's back." " Why did you stop us?" " Something happened to me today." "There was a girl ..." "Winnie Hicks." "I went to school with her." "We used to make fun of her." "On the train, she started calling me names." "Right in front of me!" " She was still only ten years old." " Maybe you fell asleep." " No, it was not a dream." " I've seen some odd things, too." " I thought it was brain damage." " In your case it probably is." "Shut that off, Steckle, this is personal." "I've been haunted by images of women that I secretly videotaped." "They're all members of the Joe Hurley Video Library." "What about you, Nelson?" "Who's come looking for you?" "His name's Billy Mahoney." "He's a kid we picked on in school." " It's no big deal." " Then what happened to your face?" " The little guy gets carried away." " Wait a minute." "I can understand Dave nodding off, and pervert here having flashbacks." "You're saying this guy physically touches you." "That is not possible!" " This is too weird." " Weird?" "We've experienced death." "Now somehow we've brought our sins back physically." " When did you know about this?" " After Joe went." " But you didn't say a word !" " Jesus Christ!" "We're scientists." "It's reckless, immoral and unethical for you to withhold your findings." "Rachel Mannus may have the answers to life and death." "She was under for five minutes!" "If she walks out of that ladies' room with those answers,   the whole world will worship her." " Just like you do." " You should've told us, Nelson." " You wouldn't have done it." " At least we'd have had a choice!" "We're fucked." " Rachel, are you all right?" " I'm okay." "I said I was fine." "Are you guys gonna watch me?" "Come on, Billy Mahoney." "Give it your best shot." "I dare you ..." "I fucking dare you." " Things from our past want revenge?" " I'm not exactly sure how it works." "But if you see anything, I want you to talk to me about it." "You can tell the doctor." " I'll be in the living room." " Is it people we've hurt?" "Did something happen tonight?" "No." "Just try and get some rest." " How's she doing?" " I think she's hiding something." " What did Nelson do to that kid?" " I don't know!" " We must keep each other informed." " Yeah, I'm sorry." "Why don't you guys take off?" "I'll stay with her." "I'm sorry." "We're gonna get you, Billy Mahoney!" "No!" "Stop, Nelson !" " How are you doing?" " I'm late." "I'll see you later." " Wait." "Where are you going?" " I've got to stop her." "Good morning, Rachel." "No ... no ..." "Her voices were wrong." "There's nothing beautiful out there." " Losing them is part of our work." " But I was wrong." "You look like you're enjoying the day." " Don't you remember me, Joe?" " Yes, of course." " Are you a model?" "You could be." " Look, I've got to go." "I'm not picking you up." "I just picked you out." "Mind if I buy you a drink?" " I'll call you this weekend." " Fine, I'm in the book." " Hey, gorgeous." " Who are you?" " What are you doing?" " Some crazy girl ..." "Do I know you?" "Would you like to?" "We don't have to do anything." "We can just lie together." "Hold each other in our underwear." "I'll call you." "I promise." "I'm tired of playing the field." "We can stop whenever you want." "It'll only make our relationship better." "I've never felt like this before." "Of course I respect you." " Call me whenever you want." " Show me that you love me." "You're not real !" "Anne, is that you?" " Is it really you?" " You sounded so upset on the phone." " I was worried." "I took the bus." " What a great surprise." " How long have you been here?" " Long enough to see your tapes." "My God !" "You're gonna think I'm leaving you because you slept with those girls." "They meant nothing to me." "I wish they had meant something." "If you had cared for any of them, " " I could have fought that." "But to film all those girls ..." "To have so little respect ..." "Those women trusted you." "You have no understanding of trust." " It's not what you think." " Yes, it is." "Hello, is this Mrs. Earl R. Hicks?" "Hello, is this Mrs. Earl R. Hicks?" "Do you have a daughter Winnie, about 26 years old?" "You do?" "I'm David Labraccio." "I was in school with Winnie." "Yeah, my parents still live there." "I wanted to get in touch with her and I was wondering ..." "Okay." "Do you have her address?" "Great." "I really appreciate it." "Bye." " Jesus!" " It looks as bad as it feels?" " You want me to take a look at it?" " No." "How's Rachel doing?" "She didn't come out of that bathroom with the answers to life and death." "Where are you going?" "Can I go?" " It's a two hour drive." " I don't want to be alone." "You will remove the left kidney and dissect the lower intestines." "Remove the ascending colon from the transverse colon." "Proceed to the sigmoid colon and on to the appendix." " Where the hell are you going?" " Are you okay?" "I would be fine if everyone would stop asking me if I'm all right." " Is she getting the heebie-jeebies?" " I'm spooking, too." "Getting us kicked out of med-school won't get Anne back." "Mannus!" "I'll handle this." "Back to work or suffer the consequences." "Fuck it." " This must be it." " Winnie did well for herself." " She won't even remember you." " It's worth a shot." " Are you coming?" " No." "listen, if anything happens ...." "If you need me, just honk the horn." "Ring, ring, ring." "Dave, you should've sent a letter." "Anybody home?" " Hi, is your mother at home?" " Coming." "Go in the house, baby." " Yes?" "Can I help you?" " Yeah, I think you can." "Are you Winnie Hicks?" "From Claremont?" "I'm David Labraccio." "We went to school together." "I was a little smaller then." "I just drove up from the city." "That's my truck." "Hello, I'm nice." "He's nice." "We're both fucking lunatics." "Can I come in, please?" "I've got to hand it to you, Dave ..." "you've got guts." "This is beautiful." "You've done well for yourself." "Well, it isn't medical school." "But I never liked school anyway." "I wasn't very good at it." " I'm surprised you remember me." " I do remember you." "I also remember the way we treated you back then." "You were a little shy, and I was a real jerk ... and I'm sorry." "What are you talking about?" "That was so long ago I don't even remember." "let's not dredge up all that stuff." "However we made you feel ..." "it was wrong." "We were wrong." "Go on." "I have a family now." "I haven't been that ugly little girl in quite some time." "You were never ugly." "Why did you come here?" "David, help!" "I know how kids are." "It didn't mean anything." " I didn't mean to come here ..." " Winnie, are you all right?" "I'm fine, Ben." "I'm sorry if I made you feel bad." "I didn't want to hurt you again." "I'm gonna go." "David?" "Thank you." "Are you sure?" "Thanks." "David, help!" "Nelson, stop." "Stop!" " Where's Billy Mahoney?" " No one's here but the two of us." "let go!" "Where the hell have you guys been?" " She freaked in class." " How are you doing?" "Fine, for somebody who keeps seeing her father who's been dead 20 years." ""Death is beautiful. " What a bunch of crap." "How are you doing, Nelson?" "Okay?" "I'd like to thank you for the nightmare." "You were so eager to jump on ..." "Welcome aboard." "You withheld information." " I'm sorry you're so upset." " You're not the only one at risk!" " I always felt this was unnatural." " Steckle, you didn't risk a thing." " Stop!" "We're all in this together." " No, we're not." "Isn't she strong?" "So independent." "When I get into trouble, I don't drag everybody down with me." "Come on !" "What happened to you?" "Caught with your videotapes down." "You swore at a little girl." "You're having bad dreams about your daddy." " I'm really sorry!" " You don't know anything about me." "But Dave does, doesn't he?" "Come on, they're your sins." "Live with them ..." "I do." "You want to see death?" "Take a good look." "It is beautiful." "You've already hurt yourself." "Do you want to hurt her, too?" "Help him find Billy Mahoney." "Just do it, all right?" " Don't leave him alone." " Why do we want to find Billy?" "Young Dr. Dave thinks he's solved our karmic problems." " Atonement, gentlemen." " Atonement?" "Wait a goddamn minute!" "You're always running away from me." "Why don't you talk to me?" " My father shot himself." " And you feel responsible?" "There was this door in our hallway and I wasn't supposed to go in ..." "Kids always feel responsible." "You could not have been to blame." "You said it yourself." "People we've wronged want revenge." "I don't know if this will help, but going to see Winnie Hicks ..." "I can't explain, but it lifted ..." "just asking for forgiveness ..." "Winnie Hicks is alive." "My father's dead." "Your father is in a good place." "He wants you to let him go." "Then why is he back?" "Here." " Where the hell are we?" " We'd better get you to a hospital." "Come on, this is a short cut." "I can't believe I remember all this." " The neighbourhood's falling apart." " Give me the keys!" "{Y:bi}Step on a crack break your mother's back ..." "last one over is a rotten egg !" "Come on, boys, salvation just ahead." "This is a graveyard." "Nelson, where the fuck are you?" "This isn't funny any more." "It never was." " Where the hell are you?" " Right here." "This is where Billy lives." "Wake up, you little shit, you've got company!" "I knew he was here ..." "because I put him here." " Billy Mahoney!" " No, Nelson, don't do it!" "I was taken away from my family when I was nine years old." "I went to Stoneham School for Boys." "I thought I'd paid my dues!" "It was an accident." "Let's go home, okay?" "Dave's right ..." "I can still make amends." "How?" " Nelson?" " Joe, I've got to borrow your car." "Nelson, wait." "My God !" "Hello." "What?" "Where?" "Nelson freaked out." "Joe and Steckle are stranded." " Will you be all right alone?" " Yeah." "Daddy." "Rachel." "Sweetheart ..." "I'm sorry." "Forgive me." "Billy Mahoney died 17 years ago, and Nelson feels responsible." " Do you know where he went?" " He ran off to make amends." " You think he'd try to flatline?" " Alone?" "That would be suicide." " David?" " No, it's Nelson." "{Y:bi}David's out trying to find you." "I wanted to say I was sorry." "Please, tell David." " l'm sorry l got you into this." " No, none of that matters now." "Rachel, everything matters." "Everything we do matters." " That's why I'm going under again." " No, Nelson, wait." " Tell me where you are." " I really am sorry." " It's payback for our arrogance." " Save it." "It's a good thing I didn't flatline." "I used to tease my fat babysitter." "Okay, Billy Mahoney, come on." " Body temperature down to 78% ." " He used potassium !" "Joe, electrodes!" "300." "Clear." " Nothing." " We have to go again." "Clear." "Go up to 360." "Clear!" " I can't hear anything." " He called." "It's been nine minutes." "let's intubate." "I can't get it in." "His trachea's too tight." "Stop, Billy!" " Nothing." " Get me 4mg of atropine ready." " David ..." " Atropine intratracheal." " This is a truckload, Dave." " This has got to work." "Come on." " Come on, Nelson." " He's been dead ten minutes." " He's not in v-fib." " Eppy intracardial." "Just do it!" "No!" "Don't do it, Billy!" "I'm sorry!" "Starting CPR !" "Starting CPR !" "It's been 12 minutes!" "He is dead." "Breathe!" "Forget about it." "We lost him." "Dave, stop it!" "Stop, David." "David, stop it!" "let him go." " We're all responsible for this." " Maybe we deserve this." "No." "It's not fair and it's not right." "I'm sorry, God !" "I'm sorry we stepped on your fucking territory!" "I'm sorry!" "lsn't that enough?" " Apparently not." " I'll call the police." "I could hear it in his voice on the phone." "He felt he deserved to die." "Bullshit!" "It was a mistake." "He was just a little kid." "He doesn't deserve to die!" "Come on, Nelson !" " Clear ..." " No, wait!" "I've got a pulse." "We've fucking got him !" " Come on, pick up the beat." " Easy, don't rush him." " Pick up the beat." " Don't rush him." "That's it." "Hail Mary, praise Jesus, and all that stuff." " Hi, don't try to talk." " I've got to get this on tape." "He said ..." "He said it wasn't such a good day to die." "Thank you."