"GOUPI RED-HANDS" "Translated for KG by rentboy" "Evening, ma." "Thanks, Marie." "Don't forget your chicory and your writing paper." " And my espadrilles?" " Coming next week." " Your stepson coming tonight?" " Yes, on the 8:50 train." " Didn't your husband go pick him up?" " Cancan!" " What do you need?" " Change for 100." "Listen, My-Coins... you should have gone to pick Sir up." " Who would mind the inn?" " Me, of course." " You're only good for chattering." " Then we could have closed up." "On the day of a band practice?" "And have them take their business to the Town Inn?" "My-Coins, turn on the lights." "We can't see anything." "Finally." "Obviously you don't pay my electric bill, Eusèbe." " Good night, My-Coins." " Good night." "9 francs, 10 cents." "5, 15 and 2 cents." "and 2 more cents and one more penny." "and 90." "Clean accounts make good friends, as your brother would say." "We'd like a couple of more beers." " Not to rush you..." " You're throwing us out." "No, I'm waiting for Sir, arriving from Paris." " Sir?" " It's his son." "Sorry." "How old is he now?" "He's 27." "He has a good job in Paris." " Has it been long since you saw him?" " 25 years." "My cousin Red-Hands went to pick him up at the station." "Tell me..." "Did you see anyone  waiting for me on the platform?" "You never see anyone here." "Excuse me." "Do you mind?" "Mr. Worker, I thought someone would be waiting for me." "I'm going to the Goupis'." "They're my parents." "Is it far from here?" "No, barely 12 kilometers." " Do you have your ticket?" " 12 kilometers?" "Swell." "Paris!" "What's new in Paris?" "You can go take a look." "It's barely 619 kilometers away." "No one." "This doesn't make sense." "Are you Sir?" "I am Eugène Goupi." "You must be the servant." "I'm your uncle Leopold." "Nothing to be proud of." "I don't like your face." "Let's go." "Don't tell me we're walking." "You could use it." "But it's OK, I brought Alberte." "Here she is." "Your father's mare." "Hand me your bag." "Well, are you getting in?" "Giddyup!" "Here, Émile." "Take your money." "And your count?" "It's correct." "Nothing extra." "Nor is it short, right?" "To each his due." "Your turn, Louis." "6 days  at 25 francs  146 francs." "I wouldn't mind a drop of red wine, with a biscuit." "When I say no, it's no." "We said 146 francs." "Here they are." "Excuse me, ma'am." "6 times 25 is 150." "Already forgot the 4 francs you owed to My-Coins for a liter of wine?" "Try not to be late tomorrow." " Good night, everyone." " Good night." "Your stomach acid flaring up again?" "If it's not the stomach, it's the kidneys." "If not the kidneys..." "Emperor." "I keep telling you not to spit on the ground." "Where then?" "Back in my days, you could spit where you wanted." "They hadn't invented microbes yet." " And the calf?" " With Jean in the stables." " Might as well have left it alone." " Sure." "I know what I'm saying." "I'm getting fed up with you and your layabout son." "Listen, Lily..." "I think the calf and Sir will arrive at the same time." "You look a sight, Sir." "They'd say the same about you in Paris." "Why do you call me "Sir," uncle Leopold?" "That's what the family calls you, since you're a Sir living in Paris." "I'm Red-Hands." "We all have nicknames here." "Better get used to it, if you're staying." "Stay?" "I don't even know why my father summoned me here." " After 25 years' silence?" " I'm not here to deliver that message." "They'll be here soon." " What time is it?" " 9." " Emperor should have long been in bed." " And you?" " We're waiting for your great-grandson." " What great-grandson?" "Ignore him." "He's pretending." " Hello, everyone." " Hello, Minain." "I'm bringing you the 10,000 francs for the poplar logs." "There was no rush." "It pays to pay your debts, as Saying would say." " If you'd like to check." " No need." "I trust you." "You made a good deal." "Our poplars are excellent." "Excellent, I don't know." "They're not made of oak." "Are your bank notes made of gold?" "Here." "I had a receipt ready." "That wasn't necessary." "No need for papers to deal with the Goupis." "Still strong, right?" "He's getting weaker." "I'll say!" "At 106, that's forgivable." " Good night, everyone." " Good night, Minain." "Take care, Emperor." "Emperor." "Give it to me." "Money isn't for fun." "Well it's boring without it." " Hello." " Good evening." "Hello, dad." "Hello, grandfather." "Well, well." "Bravo, The-Law." "Not at all, my boy." " Why not?" " My rifle doesn't aim right." "The sight is off." "You shoot at a hare, and a partridge falls." "The carpenter brought the 10,000 francs he owed us." "I put them in the cupboard." "Very well." "What about other people?" "Are you afraid I'll give you a disease, my girl?" "You already have them all." "By the way, has Sir arrived?" "Not yet." " And the calf?" " Neither." "It's odd he's not here." "I mean, my son." "What did you expect, sending Red-Hands to meet him?" "You should have gone yourself, My-Coins, if only out of respect for Sir." "But you, your customers, your business..." "Stop chattering." "I wonder why I got remarried." " What are you planning to do with this?" " Hang myself." "... And my father didn't even come to my mother's funeral last year." " Your mother wasn't a Goupi." "She wasn't built to live with My-Coins." " My-Coins?" "Your father." "He married Cancan, my sister, a real one." " A real what?" " A real Goupi." " You sure like nicknames around here." " Yours is well-earned, Sir." "And yours, Red-Hands, is it well-earned?" "See for yourself." "Giddyup, Alberte." "Is it still far?" "Getting close." "We'll be there in another 7 kilometers." "How do you like the scenery?" "On the sinister side." "What's the matter with her?" "Let's go, Alberte." "Giddyup!" " Damn it." "That's all we need." " What now?" "What's the matter?" "The axle is stuck." "What do we do?" "Good thing I have a cabin in the forest." "We'll spend the night there." " My family will be worried." " Why?" "They know you're safe." " Safe how?" " You're with me." "Yes, of course." "Come on." "Take your suitcase and follow me." "My private property." " It's a bit isolated." " That's why I picked it." "Come." "Well, are you coming?" "Leave your things there." "Odd place." "I live here because I've had enough of other people." "Some make a living in rooms." "I prefer working in the woods or on the river." "Come on, sit down." "I hope your trip made you hungry." "On the contrary, it took away my appetite." "What's this?" "This..." "It's Mr. Alfred Bonnaud, county magistrate." "What?" "His right eye closed a month ago." "Nothing serious." "But if the other eye follows suit..." "It's annoying to go blind." "It can happen to those who see too clearly." "You cast spells?" "You're crazy." "Spells are old wives tales." "I do sculptures." "I'm the artist in the family." " What's this one?" " This?" "This is the butcher." "This is one of the butcher's teeth." "Not a bad man." "But he doesn't know to keep his mouth shut." "So he's had a sore throat lately." "It might get better if he talked less." "Listen, uncle, what does this all mean?" "It's my dog." "He must have sniffed the dead woman's ghost." "What dead woman?" "This one." "She's dead?" "And pretty, eh?" "I'll show you." "The ghost?" "No." "The well where she jumped." "Coming?" "This is the dead woman's well." "Louison..." "She was so pretty they called her Goupi-the-Beauty." "She was 19, and I was 22." "Some girls kill themselves because of a broken heart." "Be careful, Sir!" "The well is very deep." "An accident could happen." "Drink, eat and go to bed." "I have to go into the forest." " At this time of night?" " Yes." "I'm meeting the devil." " It's you." " Is he here?" "He ran like a deer." "That Sir!" "I'd love to see his face." "He had me in stitches during our trip." "He must be getting fed up with his native land." "He could still stay and marry Lily." "I would be surprised." "If her father would give me her hand  I think I'd be capable of anything, even of getting serious." " Easy there, Tonkin." " Yes, I could even work the Goupis' land for her." "And yet..." "No, I can't breathe here." "I must return to the colonies." "Do you love Lily or the colonies?" "Then leave it to me." "Go follow Sir." "Fear might make him do something stupid." "I'll take the cart back to the farm." " Meet you on the road?" " OK." "Bye." "The colonies." "Sir is awfully late." "Let's hope the train didn't derail." "Yes." "Let's hope nothing happened to my mare." "I'm getting worried." "I wouldn't mind a drop of red wine, with a biscuit." "No." "No red wine, father." "No red wine especially." "I remember, once, after the revolution, in Aubeterre... but that's not what it was called back then." "It was called Leon le Franc." "Yes, that was it." "How do you know that, boy?" "You weren't born yet." "You've told me 100 times." "100 year old stories don't interest anyone." "Don't you want to go to bed, Emperor?" "I'll go to bed when I want." "Well, Jean?" "The calf?" "No calf." "Lazybones." "It's not my fault the calf doesn't want to be born." "I'm not wasting my time." "I'm going back to the inn." "I have some wine to draw." "Coming, Cancan?" "Lily." "Send word when Sir is here." "Yes, uncle." "Let me see, Jean." "What is it?" "This is a lizard, and this will be a butterfly when it's finished." "It's lovely." "Listen to me, Lily." "Yes?" "You'll be happy to see Sir." " It'll be a beautiful wedding." " And a sensible one." "Saying's lands, My-Coins' money, plus  what Sir has saved if he's like his father." " Don't touch the bust" " It's dusty." "I'll clean it myself." "I'm old enough." "Lily, you didn't answer your father." " Listen, dad." " Yes, dear." "I don't want to marry Sir." "You don't want to marry Sir?" "I don't love him." "Idiot." "How can you know?" "You've never seen him." "Exactly." "You don't marry someone you've never seen." "Dad, you're not going to... for money..." "It's true, money doesn't buy happiness." " Saying!" " But still, Tea..." " Saying!" "Yes, you're right." "Your aunt also wants you to be happy." "You don't ask a girl's permission to marry her." "I will not marry Sir." "Don't tell us you love someone else." "You do love someone else." "Who is it?" "Come on, not Tonkin." "That's too much." "Tonkin!" "That good-for-nothing, full of nasty diseases." "Chinese diseases." " What if she loves him?" " What's wrong with you?" " Just my opinion." "Well?" " Mind your own business." " You're heartless." "You listen to me." "I've kept you and your layabout son out of charity, but you asked for it this time." "Be gone at the end of the month." "Listen, Tea, you're pushing it." "Father, it's me or her." "You choose." "Tell me, mom  we're not leaving, are we?" "You kill yourself for other people..." " Come quickly." "He's here." " Sir?" "No, the calf." "Marie, bring what we need." "Here, Emperor." "Here's your wine." " You're not coming?" " No." "I don't care about their calf." "My poor Jean." "I'm going for a walk." "Why didn't Marie give me my biscuit?" "Long live the Emperor!" "Hey, listen!" "What a place." " The rascal only wants to live." " Life is beautiful." "Instead of speaking platitudes, you should be changing the litter." "Stop, you scoundrel, I saw you." "Tonkin!" "Are you here?" "No sense in hiding." "I know you're there." "I saw you." "Tonkin!" "It was you?" "Where is Tonkin?" "You did it on purpose, wicked boy." "So I wouldn't catch him." "Say, mistress, is it true you're sacking us?" "Won't you keep us?" "I've kept you on long enough." "Clear out in the morning, you and your mother!" "Please, mistress." "Tomorrow at dawn." "Out!" "No, I don't want to." "You don't want to?" "You don't want to?" "Don't do that, mistress." " You have a will now?" " Don't do that!" "You don't want to!" "You don't want to!" "Anybody here?" "Is anyone here?" "Is anyone here?" "Apparently, more of the same." "Dear God." "Well, what about Sir?" "He made it to the farm." "Finally!" "Hey, you look funny." "What's wrong?" "He's going to tell everyone." "Then they'll know he's a coward and a moron." " We overdid a bit, no?" " No way." "You and I are the shame of the family." "We have a reputation to uphold." "Climb in." "Put your bike in the back." "What a tragedy." "And we still don't know where Tea is." "Poor Emperor." "His heart must have given out." "We weren't always patient with him." "Patience!" "He lived to be 106." "We hated his rambling, and we deprived him of red wine, his only pleasure." "Go ahead and say we killed him." "Someone was killed here?" "Good evening." "What's going on?" "Emperor is dead." " Dead?" " Yes." "He had a stroke." "He died all alone." "They found him on the floor, next to the table." "A stroke?" "Come take a look, The-Law." "Look, maybe he hit his head falling." "Unless someone knocked him out." "My God." "That can't be." "Leave us alone." "Would could have done this?" "And what for?" "Wait." " The money's gone." " What money?" " None of your business." "The carpenter had brought us 10,000 francs." "They're gone." " We have to call the gendarmes." " The gendarmes?" "Bad idea, father." " Don't talk money in front of the dead." " He's right." "The gendarmes." "Around here, we'd never hear the end of it." " A gendarme will never set foot here." " Well, I was a gendarme once." "Goupi business only concerns Goupis." "Especially if the killer happens to be a Goupi, God forbid." "Why are you looking at me like this?" "Was that directed at me?" "Be careful, My-Coins." "I'm being very careful." " Goupis don't turn on each other." " Calm down." " Take back what you said, My-Coins!" " I didn't say anything." " Look at me." " I'll look where I want." "This is my house." " That doesn't make you right." " It does." " Cut it out you two!" " I didn't start it." " Meaning I did?" " Yes!" " Enough!" "We still need to figure out what we're going to do." "Emperor came back to life." "Who hit you?" "Did you see the thief?" "Tell us, did you see him?" "Come on, grandfather." " He can't talk anymore." " It's no great loss." "He was senile." "I'm such an idiot." "If he can't talk, it's the end of everything." "How will we ever find the bundle now?" "That bothers you, eh?" "What bundle?" "You've never told me." "It wasn't a story for a woman." "Especially you, with your tongue." " Well, explain." " This bundle came from Emperor's father, a railroad man." "He was called Knapsack, always wandering." "One day, he found a treasure." "Yet they say, "A rolling stone gathers no moss."" "To think this bundle is in the house, and only Emperor knows its hiding place." "Today's a day we'll remember." "I'm thirsty." "Do we have any wine?" " Of course." " Then give us some." "Coming?" "What a story!" "Bad timing for Sir's arrival." "Sir?" "Right, I forgot all about that one." " By the way, where is he?" " Wait." "He's not here?" "What?" "Didn't you fetch him from the station?" "No, I only took him to my cabin." " Cabin?" " Yes." "He wanted to walk the rest of the way, alone." "I thought I'd find him here." " I don't understand a word you're saying." " No surprise there." "It's all very strange." "Tea disappearing." "Sir disappearing." "The money disappearing." "On top of the old man getting knocked out." "Tomorrow is another day." "Let's sleep on it." "Over here!" "I found Sir." "My-Coins found Sir?" "We have to let Red-Hands know." "Red-Hands!" "Over here!" "My-Coins found Sir." "I found something else." "What could it be?" "Maybe a fox." "Everyone over here." "My-Coins!" "Bring Sir." "Red-Hands is calling us." "We're coming." "Let's go, Sir." "She was a pest." " No." " Yes, a viper." " No." " Of course she was." "It's worthless." "I should switch back to gunpowder T." "Here's Sir." "Your grandfather The-Law, an ex gendarme." " Pleased to meet you, Sir." " Your uncle Saying." "Nice to meet you." "Your cousin, Tonkin." " How do you do?" " Hello." "Hello, hello." "Well, what did you find?" "What's the meaning of this?" "I don't know." "She's dead." "She was struck in the temple like Emperor." "Except she died from it." "What was she doing in the woods?" "Tell us, this happened very close to where you were." "Didn't you hear anything?" "No." "You know I was sleeping." " What are we going to do now?" " She ran everything." "She was very strong." "Hey, over here." "I found something too." " What?" " Come and see." "The money." "It's all here." "A little bit more, grandfather." "There." "He drank all his milk." "Then he's not paralyzed." "Old people are stronger than us." "Especially that one." " Where were you, my boy?" " Taking care of the rabbits." " Not eating?" " I'm not hungry." "I ate already." " A little bit more?" " No thanks." "I have this feeling we won't find either Tea or Sir." "Why?" "I don't know, you'll see." "Someone came in the back." "We found them." "Both?" "It's just that..." "Tea is dead." " That's not true." " It is." " Her meanness killed her." " This can't be." "We found her in the woods near Cormes." " She was murdered." " How awful." "Where are the workers?" "Louis went to work the field down by the river." " And the others?" " They won't be here before 8." "It's just as well." "We took Tea to my hut." "I'll use the cart to bring her here without being seen." "I'll come with you." "I'm not going." "I'm scared of dead people." "We shouldn't stay here." "Let's not sit here." " Odd place." " Sit down." "All that's missing is a negro woman." "As soon as the gendarmes see this clutter, they'll know the score." " I don't see why." " I said no gendarmes." "I'll catch the murderer without them." " By yourself?" " Absolutely." "And I say that hiding a crime is being an accessory." "We're talking hard labor." " Goupis take care of their own business." " He's right." "Very well if you all agree." "We'll all go to jail." "Great." "Then no one will be jealous." " Where is she?" " We hid her outside." " How did it happen?" " We'd love to know." "Toinette, this is Sir." "My daughter." "Hello." "Hello, Miss." "We call her Lily." "Now isn't the time." "We need to take poor Tea back to the farm." "What are we going to tell people?" "We'll say... she died falling from a ladder to the hayloft." "You all stay back." "There are enough of us." "Join us later, Tonkin, with Sir." " See you later." " Stay a while, Lily." "Washing the dead isn't for young girls." "You stay, too, cousin." "Let's get acquainted." "Have a seat." "Do you like my hut?" "I built it all by myself." "I had one just like it in Tonkin." " It doesn't feel like we're in France." " Have you traveled?" "No, he can't have traveled much." "I did my military service in the colonial infantry. 5 years in the jungle." "Nothing better than travel." "Travel and love." " Excuse me, but..." " You're not bothering us." "So I see." "But I need to go see my room at the farm." "Go on, then." "Go see your room." " See you later." " Yes, see you later." "Are you angry?" " Yes." " Why?" "Because I don't want people to believe things that don't exist." "They will exist." "Leave me alone." " Lily!" " Let go of me!" "This is it." "Let me open the curtains." "You can't see anything." "It's the nicest room." "Tea had prepared it for you." "Who's this?" "My son." "He's a bit unsociable." "Don't mind him." "Why are you in here?" "I don't want to see her." "I'm scared of dead people." " It must be hard, all these terrible things on the day you arrive." " Indeed." "It will be expensive too." "Expensive?" "Madam's funeral." "Ah, yes." "My God." " CLOSED FOR FUNERAL " "Come on, hurry up." "But we're early." "Your brother's right." "We have to hurry before the others return." "Come on." "If only he could speak." "Even just one word." "A word might be worth 200,000 francs, 300,000, even 1,000,000 perhaps." "Grandpa." "The bundle." "Where did you hide it?" "Do you hear me?" "Nothing doing." "Listen carefully, Emperor." "We're going to walk you around the house." "When we go by the hiding place try to give us a sign, anything." "We'll get it." "This isn't right." "What?" "We won't hurt him." "A million is something." "We'll put him in this chair." "Let's start with the attic." "Come on." "Come on!" "Poor Tea." "Well, the ceremony was nice." "It doesn't match a native funeral, with Buddhist monks playing tambourines." "I don't find this kind of humor funny." "You don't say." "Sir is right, Tonkin." "My poor aunt." "Already siding with him?" " Stop talking nonsense." " I'm always talking nonsense." "Careful, don't let go." "Here, pick him up." " What could have happened?" " I don't get it." " Who saw him last?" " I did." "I left him peacefully in his bed." "Had I known, I'd have stayed with him." "More of the same." " What's happening?" " Emperor isn't here." " Maybe it's over there?" " You're wasting your time." "Let's go down to the cellar." "We might have more luck." " Listen, Red-Hands." " The others are here." "It's the house of miracles." "The paralyzed can take a walk by themselves." "Maybe not alone." "Careful." "I thought you might be up to something." "You're crazy." "We took Emperor for a walk just to distract him a little." " You're the one who's gone crazy." " That's enough out of you!" "Jean, go unhitch the mare." "You, put Emperor back to bed." "He's got some nerve." "Take care of Emperor if you like." "I'll go get undressed." "Here we are." "Isn't this fun?" " You need to get some help." " Leave me alone!" " Well, did you find the bundle?" " No." "We didn't find anything." "If someone already found it, it would explain a lot of things." "What things?" "Tea's murder." "Don't you agree, Tonkin?" " Back to that again!" " You're not accusing Tonkin!" " We didn't name anyone." "Shut up, you!" "You're as sincere as a scorpion." "Someone who's good for nothing is capable of anything." "If it's all right with you, I'll go have a rest." "Yes, go have a rest, pretty boy." "Tell me." "What were you doing all alone in the woods the other night?" "What?" "Well..." "I already told my father." "I tried to take a shortcut and I got lost." "A shortcut?" "You don't even know this place." "Exactly." "So I got lost." "But who are you really, Sir?" " Who am I?" " Yes." "You're essentially a stranger." "We know nothing about you." "What nonsense!" "Don't you know my son owns a department store in Paris?" "I hope you don't suspect me." " I didn't even know about this bundle." " Do you know this?" "It's my comb." "I found it on the floor." "So you were here the night you came." "Why didn't you tell anyone?" "That's not true." "It's true." "I was here." "My God!" "Why did you do this, Sir?" " But I didn't do anything." " You lied to us." "Why?" "Speak up!" "I've had enough of this!" "I arrive at night in an unknown place to visit a family I don't know that hasn't even told me why I'm here." "I'm picked up by some kind of nut, a kind of Bluebeard..." " Thanks." " Yes, you do everything to put me on edge." "I enter a deserted house and stumble across an old man, lying half-dead." " And I shouldn't have run away?" " But why did you lie?" "It's no fun to admit one lost one's head." "Since I'm a stranger, here are my papers if you want to see them." "Search them." "Maybe you'll find the bundle." "An envelope with the heading of my son's store:" ""Opera Shopping Center"" "Money..." " Pay stub " "Did you forget to pay one of your employees?" "Well..." "I mean..." "Name:" "Goupi, Eugène." "Post: salesman." "Section: ties." "Let's see..." "Salary: 1400 francs." "The head of a Parisian department store doesn't make much." "Commission: 423 francs." " What's that?" " It's a percentage paid on sales." "I don't understand." "Are you head or employee?" "Yes, I'm an employee." "I sell ties." "So what?" "Here I was thinking you were driving around the Opera in a fancy car." "Goupi-Sir?" "Goupi-Tie!" "Murderer!" "Thief!" "Oh Lord!" "Enough!" "I stole nothing, I killed no one." "How dare you?" "Your investigation is a joke." " It might not be him!" " Get out of here!" "You too, Cancan." "Go away, Marie!" "What did you do with the bundle?" "I swear I'll make you talk." "You took the bundle!" "You leave him alone!" "Will you women get the hell out of here?" " Where is the bundle?" " I didn't take it." " Scoundrel!" " I'm innocent." "Innocent!" "Don't you get it?" "You're all pathetic with your bundle, accumulating cent after cent." "A cent is a cent." "5 cents is a coin." "And a coin is a coin." "No." "A coin is zero." "A coin is nothing." " It's too sad." "I'm leaving." " Me too." "We should just tell people he's crazy." "He has to be." "Claiming a coin is nothing..." " Sir, I'd like to believe you, but..." " Believe what you will." "I don't care." "Get out of here!" "All of you!" "He's my son." "He only owes me explanations." "To me alone." "Go away!" "Don't act so proud." "Why don't you tell Sir why you had him come?" "Get out!" "OK, My-Coins, we're leaving." "But don't do anything foolish." "I'm warning you, sir." "You may be my father..." "Put that down, idiot." "Put it down." "Sit down." "Sit." "Are you thirsty?" "No." "Tell me about your mother." "She's the one who left me, you know." "I didn't throw her out." "She didn't blame you." "Did she talk about me?" "Yes, sometimes." "What did she say?" "She said: he's a good man but he didn't understand me." "That's it." "A bird with a bird brain who thought money was made to be spent." " So what?" " So?" "So things are okay for a while, but you eventually end up in the hospital." "And now you're taking the road to the penitentiary." " Father, I swear you're mistaken." " Listen..." "I'll assure the others of your innocence." "But tell me where you hid the bundle." "What's the matter?" "Bundle, bundle, bundle." "That's all you can talk about." "Thief!" "Will you talk?" "Will you talk?" "Truly, she couldn't have wanted to die to be swallowing all these poisons." "Marie!" "Don't stay there." "My-Coins might see you." "Come on, Jean." "You too, get out." "Marie." " Give me a piece of bread and some water." " Why?" " Never mind why." "Just do it." "Stand up." "To go where?" "I'm locking you up in the stables." " Excuse me, but I'm going back to Paris." " Oh no, you're not leaving." " You're a strange father." " You're the strange son." " You're not really going to sequester me." " Sequester!" "Such big words." "Would you prefer the guillotine?" "Go on, and not a word if you know what's good for you." "The guillotine..." "Go on in." "You can make a bed with this straw." "No smoking." " Leave it." "I'll help you." " No, no thanks." " Uncle." " What?" "I'm sure Sir didn't do anything." "Oh." "You said the same thing about me." "Did you change your mind?" "Stay out of this!" " It didn't take long, eh?" " For what?" "You love him." "It's blindingly obvious you love him." "First, that's not true." "Then..." "Then?" "Nothing." "So?" "Having fun?" "Tons." "Here's your dinner." "You're so kind." " Is that all you have to say?" " Yes." "I'm still innocent." "As you wish." "Good night." "Sir..." "Lily?" "Here." "I have to run." "Wait." "Stay a while." "You've brought ham to a thief, a killer?" "I never thought it was you." "Perhaps you're wrong." "I'm a stranger after all." "You're sad." "In the house too, everyone is sad." " Not my father." " He's the most unhappy." "I told him he was wrong." "You're sweet." "I would so like to help you." "I have to go." " You'll be back?" " Yes." "Take this." "What for?" " What do you do with a razor?" " Why do I need to shave?" "The schoolmaster is coming to visit." "He says he wants to meet you." "Very nice of the schoolmaster." "Do us proud." "It's the least you can do." "Even as a thief and murderer." "I've never killed anyone, least of all with something like this." "Give it here." "You're bound to cut yourself." "Sit down." "Take this." " Hello, teacher." " Hello, Madam." "How do you do?" "I want to thank you for attending my daughter's funeral." " Please accept again all my condolences." " Thank you." " Please have a seat, sir." " Thank you." "We miss my poor Tea." "She ran everything in this house." "That sure is true." "Yes, it's a terrible loss." "What if I told the teacher?" " What?" " That I'm just Goupi-Ties." " You won't do that." "I'm not worried." " Why not?" " Because you're still a Goupi." "Here." "That's enough." "You're clean." "Let's go." "How is Emperor?" "Excuse me." "I meant, how is your dear father?" " Still paralyzed." " What's used up is used up." "Luckily your grandson is here." "It must be a great comfort to you." "Surely." "Surely." "Here he is." "My son Eugène who has a big job in Paris." "Ah, you live in the nerve center of France." "Of course, in the nerve center." "Would you have a cigarette?" "Of course." "Thank you." "I went to Paris, once, back in 1931 during the Colonial Exposition." "What a wonder!" "The Colonial Exposition?" "No, Paris." "Paris." "Yes." "Paris, the Opera, the boulevards... our museums..." "The museums of Paris!" " Hello, teacher." " Hello, my girl." "Well, say something." "Do you know what Paris is?" "My goodness, yes and no." "Well, Paris is a symphony." "Bravo." "But how do you mean?" " Paris is you, teacher." " Pardon?" "Paris is Saying." "Paris is My-Coins, The-Law..." "Paris is the provinces." " Are you following me?" " Absolutely." "In the streets, cafes, shows, one sees Provincials, Charentans, Normans." "Those Provincials, Charentans, Normans make it possible for Paris  to be Paris." "A bouquet where each province is a flower." "How pretty." "Such eloquence." "Eloquence isn't so hard." "Let me give you some, teacher." "You see, Indochina is bathed by the Irrawaddy, the Salween... the Menam, the Mekong, and on top, the Red River." " I know all that." "It comprises Burma, the Malay peninsula, Siam..." "Cambodia, little French Cochinchina, Annam  Laos, and all the way up there, Tonkin." "That's eloquence!" "This isn't elementary school." "And what is Paris, France, Europe?" "Sad people under grey skies." "Over there, you have sun, light, color, all colors." "Orange, pink, green, yellow, pale blue..." "Overseas!" "Over there!" "There is beauty." " Over there..." " Over there, in the Orient." "Please, this gentleman is giving us news from the capital." "The capital." "I don't give a damn about the capital." "The capital, the capital." "The capital!" "It's just a little fit of malaria." "Don't mind him." "It doesn't matter." "I don't want to disturb you any longer." " Goodbye." " Goodbye, teacher." " It was a pleasure to meet you." " Likewise." " See you again soon I hope." " Of course." " Goodbye, Lily." " Goodbye." " I'll walk you out." " No need to bother." "I know the way." " Goodbye." " Goodbye." "The teacher is very polite." "Certainly." "Well, well, Sir, you have a way with words." "Thanks." "I just have a good memory of the dictation from my high school entrance exam." "With such a good memory, might you remember where you did the bundle?" "Where are you going?" "To the stables." "Pig-headed son of a gun!" "Here." "Cigarettes." "I bought them in town." "Thanks." "Why are you looking at me like this?" "Your land is very beautiful." "It's your land too." "Barely." "It has not been welcoming." "I wish they'd find the guilty party so that your father would free you." "But..." "But?" "But then you'd leave." "You don't smoke?" "I do." "If Tonkin saw us, he'd be angry." "Why?" "He might get ideas..." "Such as?" "He's not jealous?" "He has nothing to be jealous about." "Yet it seemed..." "Tonkin is my cousin, that's all." "But you're informal with each other." "It's normal between cousins." "Well..." "I too am... your cousin." "I..." "I brought you an apple." " Here." " Thanks." "Let's share?" "Thanks." "Why are you laughing?" "Apples make people laugh." "It's true." "Meanwhile, I still don't know why my father summoned me." "Do you have any idea why?" "You do know?" "Don't lie." "Yes, I know why." "It's as complicated as all that?" "No." "But it's a bit funny." "They asked you to come because..." "they want to marry me off." "To whom?" "To you." "No, really?" "Marry us..." "But... you don't love me." "Of course not." "You neither." "Still looking at the scenery?" "Listen, Lily..." "You must know..." "Why are you here, lazybones?" "Careful." "You're going to spoil a beautiful love scene." "Lily!" "I told you to stay out of this." " Go away!" " But uncle..." " Now!" "Haven't you caused enough trouble?" "Let's go." "Come on!" "Go on." "If you absolutely insist..." "Anyway, I don't care anymore." " Is Saying here?" " Next room." " Saying, I need to talk to you." " I'm busy." " It's important!" "Hey!" "More lead." "Too much pressure, and a quail would go through." " Much ado about nothing." " I need to talk to you." "I know I'm a layabout, good for nothing burnout like you say." "We know." "What's the matter?" "I love Lily." "Seriously." "Understand?" "Give her to me." "I'll work, here, with you." " Promises of a drunk." " No!" "No." "You want her to marry a Goupi, but you can't choose Sir after what he's done." " No, he can't have her." " Then let me." "I'm a Goupi." "Sir won't marry Lily, but neither will you." " Why?" " We don't believe you." " I'd rather see her a spinster." " This is your final word on this?" " Yes." "Ties." "Ties!" "Ties!" "Wouldn't you like to buy a little tie, Madam?" "A little tie, for your husband." "They're silk." "Blue." "But the color doesn't suit you." "Take this red one." "It makes a nice bow tie." "See how lovely it is..." "Tie, tie, tie, tie..." "Piece of shit!" "Poor Tonkin." "He's a wretch." "I'm going to visit My-Coins." "Ties..." " GENDARME STATION " " Hello." " Hello." "Hello, The-Law." "Hello, colleague." "A drink?" "Thanks, but I'm on duty." " Duty?" " Yes." "I'm here to speak to Marcellin Goupi" " alias My-Coins, innkeeper." " I'm here." "What is it?" "Your son, Eugène Goupi, alias Sir, residing in Paris does live currently under your roof?" " Yes?" " Where is he?" "I don't know, He comes and goes." "Today he's hunting with Red-Hands, I think." " Wouldn't he be locked up in your stables?" " My God." " What are you saying?" " I'm sorry, My-Coins..." "I've always liked the Goupis, but they say there's a lot going on in your house." " They're having you on." " We'll see about that." "One moment, sergeant." "Do you have a search warrant?" " Absolutely." " Show me." "What?" "You, The-Law, a former gendarme?" "I'm still a Goupi." "It's in order, no?" " Yes, it is." " OK, let's go." "Well, we're in for it." "Red-Hands, come on over!" "I'm coming." "You'll tire yourself out." "I don't like to see you like this." "Then take it up with them." " With whom?" " The family." "The lovely family." "They wanted a match." "Well now they've got one." " You pulled another stupid stunt, I bet." " Go have a look." "I'll be in your cabin." "Because I really don't feel like seeing the Goupis today." "Let's proceed." "A sum of 10,000 francs was stolen." "From whom?" "What do you mean?" "From you!" "From us?" "That's news." " You were robbed?" " Thank God, no, but maybe My-Coins was?" "I didn't notice." "You heard about this, Cancan?" "Oh dear, no." "And you, Marie?" "Not at all." "So it's like that, eh?" "Very well." "We'll see." "A bundle has gone missing." "This is no laughing matter." "I repeat..." "A bundle has gone missing." "Good one." "A bundle in the house." "Brought by Santa Claus, no doubt." "And we had no idea." "Did you know, Emperor?" "And what would this bundle be worth, Sergeant?" "The-Law, you're risking Contempt of an Officer of the Court Performing his Duties." "Punishable by a fine of 16 to 200 francs." "Article 224 of the Law of May 13, 1863." "Help yourself, Eusèbe!" "Enough!" "What?" "Tea was murdered 5 days ago, and you have the nerve to joke around?" "Tea died falling from a ladder in the barn." "That remains to be proved." "In any case, you can't deny you sequestered your son." "I didn't sequester him." "I punished him." "Punished?" "He talked back to Emperor." "Isn't that right, Eugène?" "That's right." "I disrespected my great-grandfather." "And..." "I'm sorry." "You're all making fun of me." "But you're wrong to speak of Emperor." "The poor man was beaten up until he lost his speech." "I wouldn't mind a drop of red wine, with a biscuit." "Hello, Eusèbe." "There you have it." "Now, I'll write to the Prefect and I'll get you fired." "We'll see about that." "Meanwhile, I'm taking a different tack and I'm questioning you one by one." "Let's go!" "Come on, let's go." "Go, go, go." "Him first." "Take him next door." " The others, stay right here." " Why him first?" " That's what I want." " Where were you?" " Taking care of the animals." " Well, he stays here too." " Where?" "There?" " Yes, there." " Eusèbe is such an idiot." " That, he is." "You have the gendarmes you wanted." "You must be pleased." "If Tea was around, she'd get us out of this." "But if she was here, the gendarmes wouldn't be." "It's true." "What am I saying?" "What is it now?" "The gendarmes are here." "We were denounced." "We'll have to sell the house and leave this area." "That's funny..." "The Emperor's clock stopped." "Odd." "Listen, Red-Hands." "Listen." " Yes, I'm all ears." " Only you can get us out of this." "I'm neither God nor the devil." "No, but you're the cleverest one in the family." "Since when?" "Since just now?" "Don't forget you're a Goupi too." "Listen, The-Law, you haven't always said so." "Do you ever think about Goupi-the-Beauty?" "Had you not stopped us marrying, she wouldn't be in that well." "So you say." "Anyway, that's ancient history." "Old bastard." "Grandfather!" "Uncle..." "What's the matter with you?" "What's this face?" " The gendarmes have taken Sir." " What's it to you, Lily?" "What?" "But that's awful, uncle." "I thought Tonkin was the one you liked." "It's just that..." "Tonkin was the one saying he wanted to marry me, couldn't live without me." "Poor Tonkin." "He failed at everything." "So Sir is the one you love?" "We'll take care of your Sir." " You'll save him?" " I'll try." " But how?" " I don't know yet." "Tell me, everybody, what exactly happened here that night?" " Well..." "I don't remember." " Neither do I." "I bottled some wine." "There was the birth of the calf." "The calf, sure, but how was Tea?" "She was grumbling, as always." "That was all." "That's not true." "She said she was throwing us out." "Don't waste your time listening to this simpleton." "Come, tell me about it upstairs." "What does he want with this boy?" "Sit here." "We're going to have a little chat." "So she wanted to dismiss you?" "Yes." "What happened after that?" "Everyone went to see the calf." " And you?" " I went for a walk in the woods." "What about Tea?" "She came after me with a whip." "So I ran into the woods." "What happened then?" "She also went into the woods." "She was yelling: "You're there, Tonkin." "I know you're there." "I saw you."" "So I showed myself, and she started whipping me." "She was saying, "You're there, Tonkin." "I saw you?"" "Jean, you know what happened." "Tell me the truth." "It's Tonkin, right?" "No, no..." " Leave me alone." "I don't remember." " Tell me the truth." "It's Tonkin?" "It's not Tonkin." "It's me." "My little Jean, that's not possible." "You're saying that to scare me." "No." "That's not true, Red-Hands." "I'm sure he didn't do this." "Yes, I did." "He's lying, and I know why." " It's OK, Marie." "I'll take care of it?" " What are you going to do?" " Don't tell the gendarmes I was here." " I won't." "... monthly." "That's not much to live on in Paris." " Plus commission, sergeant." " Mind your manners!" "I said, plus commission." "It's a percentage on sales." "Ah, that's better." "Tell me." "They said you had a department store back there." " They also say, I killed my aunt." "So..." " Maybe they're right." "Do you have a match?" "Tell me." "Who was the first person in the family to see you?" "It was..." "My uncle Leopold." "He came to fetch me at the station." "Leopold?" "Who's that?" "Red-Hands." "By the way, where is he, that one?" "Yes, Mr. The-Law..." "Off to jail, eh?" "You too, Mr. Saying..." "In jail." "As for you, Mr. My-Coins." "No debate." "Off to the guillotine." "Nice work." "Yes, good." " They shouldn't have refused me Lily." " She didn't love me." " Yes, she did." "Before Sir came along, of course." "Why?" "What is it?" "What's going on back there?" "Jean confessed to killing Tea." "Jean!" "Jean said that?" "But you were wrong to call the gendarmes." "They'll pursue this to the end." "The end of what?" "They'll find out who stole the 10,000 francs." "You!" "Me?" "What an idea!" "I saw you throw them down next to Tea's body." "Ah yes, I did." "Yes, I did." "When I saw the money in the old man's hand, I thought it would be useful." "I was fed up with the Goupis, fed up with their mugs, fed up with everything." "I was thinking of sailing from Bordeaux." "When I saw that a dead body was involved, I didn't dare." "Why didn't you tell me that Jean had killed Tea in the woods since you knew it?" "How would have I known?" "I never left the road since I never entered the farm." "What's wrong?" "You're lying." "You came back to the farm since you took the 10,000 francs." "I came back to the farm." "So?" "Then you ran into the woods and Tea chased after you." "Tea!" "What an idea." "Jean told me so." "Yes... she chased after me." "So what?" "Then you dared return to the farm because you knew she would never talk again." "Poor Tonkin." "You did it for 10,000 francs..." "You killed her." "Yes, I killed her." "But I didn't kill her for money  but because she was wailing on Jean." "She was beating him, beating him so viciously." "You scum!" "You wanted me, eh?" "You snake." "What are we going to do?" "It makes no difference now." "None." "Run away." "But first you'll write me a confession note." "Then you'll go." "Hold them!" "Surrender, Tonkin!" "Sergeant!" " Where is he?" " Climbing this tree." "Boo!" "Come down or I'll shoot!" " Don't do it, Eusèbe!" " I'm just trying to scare him." "I'll shoot, you hear?" "Watch this!" "What a zoo!" "Is he really trying to escape?" " Come down, idiot!" " Where is he?" "I've lost him." "There, on that branch." " Come get me!" " Careful, Tonkin!" " Come get me." " Tonkin, get down!" " No!" " Come on, Tonkin, get down!" "Never." "Never." "I'll never come down again." "What's going on up there?" "It's Tonkin!" "He's gone crazy." " Let's not risk talking to him." " No way." "Tonkin.... ... I'll shoot, you hear?" "How tiny they look." "Almost like ants." "Nasty little ants..." "If I jump, I'll crush you all." "Tonkin, listen to me." "It's Red-Hands." "There's no more Red-Hands." "You go to hell, now!" "Go to hell!" "Tonkin!" "There's no more Tonkin." "I can see the world." "All of it." "If I wanted to, I could fly away." "Fly away." "We must do something." "You herd of sheep." "My poor Tonkin..." "I'm in the light." "Light, sun." "I see the sun, there, I see it." "Yes, I see it." "I am the sun." "Poor Tonkin..." "What are you doing here?" "I came..." " That's not right." " Pardon?" "Why are you touching this?" "I'm sad too." "He was sadder." "What happened isn't my fault." "Of course not." "What Tonkin did, he did for me." "For me alone, you hear?" "I can't explain it to you." "I have the right to come here." "You don't." "But, Jean..." "You mustn't stay." "It's wrong." "Jean is right, Lily." "Come." "They're waiting for us at the house." "It's lunch time." "Come on." "Come on, Emperor, don't be childish." "I know where your bundle is." "I know when you found it." "It's when you reset my clock." "It's there?" "Everyone could see it." "No one suspected it." "My famous hiding place." "We thought it was copper." "But it's gold." "The counterweights are also gold." "They're painted over." "It's very valuable." "Come on, Emperor, you have to tell them." "I'll play dumb." "You must be the one to tell them." "If you happened to die..." "I'm not planning on it." "That's life." "I'll tell them on Epiphany day, when we're having our king cake." "I don't mean to upset you, Emperor, but I don't think you'll see the new year." "Then I'll tell them on Christmas eve." "I doubt you'll be with us for Christmas." "I'm in that bad shape?" "It's odd." "Good grouping, but it's still weak." "Red-Hands is there with Emperor." "What can they be talking about?" "Then you'll tell them..." "Yes, yes." "Come closer." " Grandfather." " Cutie." " Grandfather." " My boy." "What could they be talking about?" "An empty stomach has no ears." "Soup?" "Wait a bit." "He'll have to leave soon." "We're not inviting Red-Hands?" "Why not?" "Why isn't he leaving?" "Maybe they're discussing the marriage of Sir and Lily." "Emperor wants to see the wedding before he departs." "Very well, if that's what you want." "Careful." "Here he comes." "Enjoy your lunch." "Won't you have a bite with us, uncle?" " If you insist." " I'm glad." "Sit here, uncle." "How about some soup?" "I know where the bundle is." " What!" "?" " I know where the bundle is." "I've seen it." " Where is it?" " I won't say." " Thief!" " You know money doesn't interest me." " Emperor forbade me from telling you the hiding place." " No way!" "His will is for the bundle to remain where it is." "No one will touch it." "Except for the farm, in case of emergency." "Because it's money found, not money earned." "Listen, Sir  you don't know peasants, but you will learn." "They respect money, because money is work." "As they say, the earth is hard." "So for them, 5 cents is a coin." "Understand?" "Yes, Red-Hands, I understand." "When I feel my time coming, I'll call you and show you where the bundle is as Emperor showed it to me and as old Knapsack showed it to Emperor back in the day." "You two will get married and have children." "When you feel your own hour approaching you will call the one who happens to be the oldest Goupi at that time." "And this will go on as long as there are Goupis."