" Are you there?" " I'm here." "Help me." "My client is going to jail." "Oh, no, she's not." " I think I've got it." " Really?" "Look up Hasson versus Conrad." "Similar circumstantial evidence." "Case was thrown out." "Legaleagle, thank you." "You are by far the most brilliant mind in this chat room." "Thank you, Lawyer-girl." "I realise we have certain anonymity here, but do you, by any chance, have a name?" "It's Charlene." "I missed you yesterday." "How was your day?" "Uneventful." "I exercised for an hour in the morning, poked around in the yard in the afternoon, visited with a girlfriend down the block in the evening." "Sounds innocent." "Don't let my humdrum day fool you now." "I also have a very dark side." "Well, I'm 31 with long, flowing locks and an athletic body." "Peter, what do you look like?" "I'm... a little older, 6'2", my hair is..." "It's light." "It's boyishly light." "And good night to you, Lawyer-girl." "Gendler." " Morning, Mr Sanderson." " Hi." " Morning, Peter." " How are you?" "Don't worry." "I've taken care of it." "Oh, good." "Peter's here." "We can begin." "On to pressing business." "Word has come to us coffee heiress Mrs Virginia Arness has dismissed her current tax lawyers." "Virginia Arness. 74 years old, born and raised in Athens, Georgia." "At 13 she was sent to boarding school in England, where she's resided till recently." " That was only two days ago." " Impressive!" "Now, we've all heard that Mrs Arness has a penchant for thriftiness." "And that she brings new meaning to the term "conservative"." "It's not going to be easy." "She's paranoid and suspicious." " Peter?" " I'm her guy." "I'm single." "I'll give her nights, weekends." " Aren't you getting married Sunday, Todd?" " That's flexible." "And, Peter, I wouldn't want this to interfere with your family's Hawaiian vacation." "You go on." "I got it all taken care of." "Mahalo." "Well, that's very admirable of you, Todd." "Your youth definitely makes you an ass set to the company." "Especially at the annual softball game." "But to an archconservative 74-year-old woman..." "What we will do is not charge Mrs Arness one single cent for her estate planning." "Why?" "Because we don't care about that measly fee." "We use it as a loss leader to get her multibillion-dollar coffee conglomerate." " How may I help you, Howie?" " Congratulations on turning it around." " Turning what around?" " You snaked Gendler." " Please." "Gendler doesn't bother me." " Oh, that's right." "He doesn't bother you." "What the heck was I thinking?" "I thought maybe after work you and me go tie one on, check out the local talent." "I can't." "I'm meeting Mrs Arness at six." "And it's "You and I go", not "You and me go."" "Somebody messaging you here." "Who's Lawyer-girl?" " Nobody." " Whoa!" " Did someone make a blind Internet date?" " No." "I mean, well, technically... but, no." "I met her in a legal chat room." "She's... she's very classy and smart." " When do you nail her?" " I'm courting her tonight at seven." "Jeez, you're courting her." "Sounds like a hot one." "This is her?" " Yeah." "Attractive, isn't she?" " I suppose." "Not my cup of tea." " She is universally cute." "Anyone..." " She's too anaemic looking." "Petey, I like my Jell-O to jiggle, if I'm not being too subtle." " You're not being too subtle." " If she spins your knobs, I'm happy for ya." " Have you nailed anyone since Kate?" " Nail...?" "I had to call her." " Sofia, call my wife." " Ex-wife." " Uh, my ex-wife." " Right away." "Can't help you with this one, pal." "See you later." "You cannot break another promise to these kids." "You just can't!" "I said I couldn't take them to Hawaii, but they can spend the week with me." "They are gonna be so disappointed." "I can't talk to you right now." "Daddy can't take you to Hawaii." " Oh, darn." " He always does this." " Sanderson." "Party of two." " You're the last to arrive." " How long has she been here?" " About 20 minutes." "Was she trouble?" "Thank you." "Hello." "I'm Peter Sanderson." "Well, I'm glad they didn't send a child." "I told them I specifically wanted someone my own age." "What a wonderful French bulldog." "They make great companions." "What's her name?" "His name is William..." "Shakespeare." "Of course." "Now, I've heard about your unfortunate escapade." "I don't have escapades." "Fiasco with your previous attorney." "The man was a thieving criminal." "Just because I have a lot of money, doesn't give people the right to overcharge." "I do not enjoy being taken advantage of." "Which is why our service is free of charge." "After all, you worked hard for your money." "I'm an heiress." "An heiress who worked hard to keep her money." " Shall we get down to business?" " Fine." "You may hand over your proposal." "I'll take it with me." "Proposal?" "I was expecting to meet with you tomorrow." "I was assured the proposal would be ready this afternoon." " I see no point in our meeting tomorrow..." " Excuse me, madam." "I'm sorry." "We have a no-dog policy in the lounge." "I'm going to have to ask you to remove the dog." "Excuse me." "I'm Mrs Arness's attorney, and because there is no sign regarding dogs, that means there is no policy toward dogs." "Now, if you want to avoid a legal situation, I suggest you run to the kitchen and get some tuna tartare for William Shakespeare on the house." "Yes, sir." "Terribly sorry, ma'am." "Where and when tomorrow?" " Hello, Mr Sanderson!" " Mrs Kline." "Always a pleasure." "And when am I going to get to baby-sit with your charming little Georgey again?" "Well, soon, because he just loves coming over to your place." "Mr Sanderson?" "Those Latin people who were skulking around?" "Oh, they were looking at the Arruda house." "Casing it?" "No... uh, to buy it." "Oh, please!" "If they're in this block and not carrying a leaf-blower..." "Yeah, well, I'd love to discuss this with you further, but I'm expecting someone." "Come on." "Yeah." "Hey." "Hi." "Mm, yeah." "I hope you like cham poo." "Wassup, baby?" "Ooh, champagne." "I love champagne." "This for me?" "Sorry." "I think you have the wrong house." "It is damn good to finally connect." " Pardon me?" " It's me, fool." "Charlene." " Ooh, food." " What?" " It's me, honey." "Your date" " Lawyer-girl." " You can't be." " Hey, leave that alone." " Why can't I?" " Because you're not a blonde." " Can't get nothin' past you." "You must be a bomb-ass lawyer." "Oh, look at all these pretty candles." "All romantic an' shit." "Somebody was plannin' on gettin' some booty tonight." "Leave that." "It has settings." "You can't be Charlene." ""Charlene" is more of a..." " Skinny, white broad?" " Yeah." "I get that a lot, but that's your fault you think that, bro." "You must've not've took a good look at that pi'ture." "I have looked at that pi'ture a lot and, trust me, you are not in it." "Move, move, move." "Let me do it." "See?" "There I am." "Sorry you got it twisted, dog." "I don't get a lot of photo ops where I've been." " Where exactly have you been?" " I got a rumble in the jungle." " We still havin' dinner?" " I asked you a question." " Rolex." " Rolex?" " I did time, baby, but I ain't do the crime." " You're a convict?" "Bump that." "Roscoe cracked that door." "I kicked it off the heazy and bounced!" "For real though." "What did you just say?" "What?" "Don't you hear good?" "All right, let's see." "How can I put this?" "I was recently liberated from a correctional facility..." "I get it." "You were in the big house." "You get someone to type for you, get on the Internet and misrepresent yourself." " Type for me?" " I'm a sucker, but now you have to go." "Uh-uh." "No, no, no, biscuit." "You misrepresented yourself." ""Boyishly light"?" "Please!" "Grey." "You said you was a criminal lawyer?" "I pulled your file." " You're just some sorry-ass tax attorney." " A tax lawyer is a criminal lawyer." "Oh, yeah?" "Well, good, cos that's why I'm here." "Do tell." "Well, I wanna reopen my case." "And what did you do, smoke some homies on a drive-by?" "Smoke?" "Homies?" "You're a regular gangster, huh?" "No, man." "I was in for armed robbery, but I didn't do it." " Yeah, nobody did it." " I really didn't." "I can't talk to you, you're a criminal." "I'm not, or I'd have shanked you with that knife." "Just the fact you even said that is a problem for me." " It's time to go." " Please, listen to me." "Give me a second." " I don't have a second." " OK." "Can I just say something, please?" " What?" " I didn't do the crime." "You rude mother..." "I ain't goin'." "It's your baby, Peter!" "And don't you deny it!" "That DNA test told on you." "You lied, Peter!" "You know little Kareem is yours." "Why?" "How could you do me like that, Peter?" "You told me I was your beautiful African queen, and I loveded you for that, Peter." "I didn't care if your little thing was curved." "And little Kareem don't want your child support." "He just want a relationship with his white daddy." "A little chocolate-vanilla squirl from that magical night at the crackhouse!" " Come on." "Just be quiet." " Wait just a second." "My shoes." "Mr Sanderson, is everything OK?" "I thought I heard Negro." "No." "No Negro spoken here." "Well..." "Good night then." "Good night." "Come on." "Come on." "You stay." "You wait right there." "Who you callin'?" "The police." " Police department, please hold." " What's that?" "This is all of our emails." "Think anybody at your firm'd wanna hear you was lookin' for boom-boom in the pen?" " And I'll send a photo." " Thanks for holding." "Can I help you?" "Now, this is just for tonight." "Understand?" "A'ight." "I can work with this." "But don't be gettin' no ideas about sneaking' up in here and hittin' this ass, cos you blew your chance with this fine sister." "Dare to dream." "Please!" "Oh, my God." "A bed." "A nice, big, cushy bed." "Oh, no roommates, no cellmates." "Charlene?" "Charlene." "Charlene!" "Come on." "You're not fooling anybody." "Who dat?" "Who there?" "Who want it with 'Lene?" "I put some bagels outside." "I thought we could discuss your case." "What up, dog?" "Where them bagels at?" "Guess what, girlfriend?" "I burned all those emails, including the set you hid in the lining of your coat." "And I deleted everything off my computer." "So I never met you and you never met me." "Don't even try, girlfriend, because it's locked." "And now I am going to go get my kids:" "Innocent young persons who will never know you were here." "So now just go." "Go, go, go, go." "And lockie." "So ta-ta, and watch out, the gate closes automatically." " What about my stuff?" " Right there on the street." "You put my stuff on the trash?" "You know what?" "I wish you well." "I really do." "And you know what?" "I had a great time." "It was really fun." "So, oh, well, I guess I'll just see you in my next life." "Bye." "Ha-ha." "I'll see you when you get home." "So I said to him "Just cos you whisked me off to Paris on your private jet, doesn't mean I'm gonna sleep with you."" " What does he think I am, a hooker?" " Can Aunt Ashley edit herself, please?" "You stayed in the same room with him." "What did you expect?" "It was a suite." "Plenty of floor space." "Have a wonderful time." "I love you." " And help your brother with his reading." " I will." " Is he still having problems?" " He struggles, but he's improving." " Dad's here." " Thank you, sweetie-pie." "Don't worry, sweetie." "Daddy's stupid too, and he became a lawyer." " Ashley!" " I'm not stupid." " That's right." " Of course not." " Hey, Dad's here." " Speak of the dummy!" " Hey, how's my little girl doing?" " Hi, Dad." "How's it going, big guy?" "Here you go!" "Hi, Kate." "Hi." "Ashley, I didn't know you'd be here." "What a pleasant surprise." "Peter, you're almost ageing well." "I thought we'd go to the club and take a swim." "How's that sound?" "Sounds much more fun than Maui." "Not all of us earn our living by milking rich geriatrics." "Some of us work for a living." "You sound much more intelligent with your mouth shut." "Let's not start this." "I don't have time." "Kids, go get your stuff." "All right, fine." "But I warned you about marrying the first jerk-off you met out of college." "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a date." "Don't be good." " What morgue did you find this one at?" " Stop being so childish." "Wow." " You look beautiful." " Thank you." "Peter, this is Glen." " Mr Sanderson, nice to see you." " Yeah, nice to meet you." "What do you say we get this road on the show, pumpkin?" " I'll meet you outside." " OK." " "Road on the show."" " Just don't." " How old is he?" " Younger." " What's he do?" " Golf instructor." " How do you know?" " What?" "You think you know somebody, then wake up missing a kidney." "He could have made up this whole golf identity." "He caddied for you when he was 14." "That's little Glennie?" " Does that bother you?" " Not at all." "Go have fun on your statutory weekend." "This does, too, bother you." "I know you." " Can we talk about it?" " It just looks silly..." "Hang on." "Hello?" " Some things never change." " I can't talk right now." "Well, put him on." "Hi." " You promised you'd take us snorkelling." " Things come up." "That's life." "I know." "I'm really, really sorry." "But now it's over." "We're gonna have fun." "What's new with you?" "Well, I got the female lead in the school play Oklahoma." "Great." "Congratulations." " How about you, big guy?" "How's school?" " I don't like school." "Nobody does, but there must be something you like about it." " He got into a fight the other day." " Why'd you get in a fight?" "Some kids called me a baby cos of the way I read." "Some of the greatest minds had trouble learning, like Edgar Allan Poe and Albert Einstein." "And Ozzy Osbourne." " Ozzy rules." " Ozzy rules." "OK." " Dad, what's going on?" " You two wait here." "I'll be right back." "Whoa, where you think you're goin', milk?" "This here's a charitable event." "You wants to get in, you gots to make a donation." " Trust me." "It is off the hook in there." " Off the what?" "I live here." "I don't care if you're Halle Berry, man." "No donation, no entry." "How about if I call the police?" "Have a nice time." "Too low." "What the hell is going on here?" "Yo, Pete." "It's cool." "I hit up my homegirl." "I had to get my hair done, as we both know." "She called a friend, they hollered to their friends, before you know it, we got us a house party." "I want everyone out of here, now!" "People!" "People!" "Loosen your panties, grandma." "Look, you lock me out, no money, no place to go." "A girl got to get her cheese on." "Seven." "This is insane." "My boss's sister lives across the street." "I can't have these peop..." "Seven, baby." " She doesn't have a driver's permit." " Dad!" " Do not go in..." " Roll it." " Don't inhale." " Toss them bones, my man." "I'm on a roll, Dad." "Get out." "I want you and your dogs to go back to the pound, now!" "What?" "Was it "dogs"?" "Cos she said dogs and then I said dogs, so I assumed it'd be OK." " Bye, Toneeka." "Y'all be good now." " Bye." " Y'all got to go." " A'ight." " Hey, baby." "Gotta go." " Bye, Bear." "Thank you so much." "Party's over." "OK." "Thanks for coming, but that's it." "It's over." "If I see Widow, I'm gonna tell him you're out." " You know he wants to know that." " I don't know about that." "I'll see you." " Hi." " How you doin', neighbour?" " What are you still doing here?" " What was all that?" " Dad, who's this?" " This is no one." "My name is Charlene." "What's your name?" " I'm Georgey..." " You cannot meet a nonexistent person." " Can Charlene come to the club?" " Club?" "What club?" "We're not going to a club, remember?" "We're going to Hawaii." "You know the routine." "Outsky." "Come on, out." "Let's go." "Sarah, get the door." "Come on." "Out, out, out." " Wait!" " What?" " Give me my money." " That money should go to charity." " What?" " Hey, I live here." "Yeah!" "OK, you guys order hot dogs and you splash and frolic." "Put everything on my account and just have fun." " Didn't you bring your bathing suit?" " No." "I'm having tea with a client." " But I will be right back." " Whatever you say." " Wanna go swimming?" " With you?" "Get real." " How's it looking?" " I was up all night proofing." "It's brilliant, and you have the cleanest background check I've seen." "That check cost me a lot of fun in my life." "What's crackin', ma?" "I'm lookin' for the Sanderson table." "We old college buddies." "OK." "He's in the dining room." "I'll show you..." "Oh, no, no, no." "I tell you want, I'll surprise him." " You're in great shape." "I'm gonna take off." " You're right." "Nothing could go wrong." "I've done this a million times with important clients, so I'm fine." " Shazam!" " What?" "Oh, no." "No." "Oh, swing it, you cocoa goddess." " That's the rude shock I told you about." " That's Charlene?" "Did she see me?" "OK, OK, OK." "Police." "Uh, no." "Won't get here fast enough." "Security." "No." "She could probably take him." "Money." "That's it." "Money." "Look..." "Hi." "Here, just here's whatever." "And there's more where that came from, if you go now." " No." "Uh-uh, boyfriend." "We got business." " Boyfriend?" "Didn't I tell you?" "We're dating." "It's street talk." "It's street for I'm not goin' nowhere until you help me." "Look, Mrs Arness, a very important client, is due here any minute." " Good afternoon." " Good afternoon." "Mr Sanderson?" " Yes." "He's in the dining room." " Thank you." "Charlene, how about you and I havin' a smart cocktail down by the pool?" " Who is this fool?" " That's a good idea." "Put it on my bill." "I don't want no smart cocktail." "I need your help." "Miss?" "Another Martini." " She ain't talkin' to me." " Ashley, she doesn't work here." "If she isn't here to work, then what is she here for?" "Miss Thing, you best pump yo' brakes." "She's my ex-wife's sister." "I'd have killed her years ago." "It's Mrs Arness." " Old iron-ass be lookin' mean." " Yes." "You have to go." "You like raw oysters, Charlene?" "Yeah." "I guess I can hang out for a bit." " They got any hot wings here?" " Whatever you want." "Yes, yes, yes." " You give me a home?" " Yes." " You work on my case?" " Around the clock." " I leave when you expunge my record?" " Consider it expunged." "All right." "I'd like a key, please." " Mr Sanderson." " Mrs Arness." "Who is your associate?" "Howie Rottman, the attorney I told you about." " A great pleasure to meet you, Mrs Arness." " I meant her." "Her?" "Her?" "Her is..." "Her..." "She is our nanny." "Dad, I'm bored." "Kids, how good to see you." "Don't we just love our nanny Charlene?" "Yeah." "Don't you just love being our nanny, Charlene?" "Yessir." "I'm gonna go on down to de pool wit' de children." "Make fun of de white folks again." " The kids just love her." " What a sense of humour." "Peter, I'm going to hang by the pool." "If you need me, that's where I'll be." "Mrs Arness." " Right this way, Mrs Arness." " Come on, William." " You have the papers?" " Yes, I do." " Strange clothes for a nanny." " It's just a fashion." "Mind." "Hello, Sanderson family." " Georgey, don't forget poker night." " I won't." "How could I forget poker night?" " I propose a toast." " OK." "To us." "May we always..." " Sorry." "That's mine." " You're not gonna answer that, are you?" "It might be..." "It might be one of my kids." "Sorry." "Hello." " Hey, it's me." " Oh, hi, Ashley." "Everything OK?" "I don't know." "I saw Peter at the club today." "He was mingling with a large black woman." "What?" "What are you talking about?" "He said it was his nanny." "She didn't look like any nanny I'd seen." "She was all tattooed and Banji and welfare-ish." "It was..." "Oh, is that funny to you?" "Is that funny?" " Am I funny to you?" " No." "No, that's not funny." " Were you laughing at me?" " Oh, I wasn't..." "Stop." "Get away." "No, I wasn't laugh..." "laughing at you." "Just... hang on." "You know, look, I know Peter." "I know him." "He won't always take care of the kids." "He hired somebody." "Kate, this woman was no nanny." "You need to do something." "I saw this woman." "I was there, you weren't." " You should at least look at references." " Thank you." "Peter is nothing if not responsible." "It's not like he's gonna hire a convicted felon." "I wouldn't be too sure about that." "Let's see, we've got resisting arrest, assaulting an officer, eye-gouging and scrotum-crushing." "I was riled up, bein' framed an' all." "Your clothes and ID were found at the scene." " All plants." "I never robbed nobody." " OK." "I know my rights." "I get an appeal." "I get an appeal." "No, you only get one if you were convicted and incarcerated." "You were released." "Why don't you just start over?" "Go back to school, get at least a passing familiarity with the English language." "You can accomplish anything with commitment." "My daughter Sarah is fully committed, and she's going places." "She's goin' places all right." " What's a charitable remainder trust?" " Gives the tightwad a deduction each year." " No more calls, Sofia." " It's not a call." "There's someone here..." " Girl, move!" " I do not know who you are!" "Send her in." "Bet you know me now, huh?" " This couldn't wait until tonight?" " Well, well." "Have a seat, spend some time." "Thanks." "And, no, it can't wait." "Check this out." "I found a deposition." "The prosecution interviewed an eyewitness and she told them the perpetrator had no tattoo on the chest." "They never told my lawyer about this chick." " That's withholding ex..." " Exculpatory evidence." "I know." " How do you know that?" " Why wouldn't she?" "She's got it goin' on." " All I did in there was read law books." " And with comprehension." " Made you think I was a lawyer." " You have pockets of intelligence, so why do you walk and talk and act the way you do?" "Because it's sexy." "It ain't actin'." "This is who I am." "You think I can't talk like you?" "Peter, I absolutely love what you've done with the place." "It's so sterile, so bland, so wonderful." "See?" "You can do it." "You like that?" "Kiss my natural black ass cos I don't need your approval." "She don't need your approval." "You don't think I compromise how I act?" "You think I like walking around like an uptight honky?" "Yes, I know your lingo." " Mr Tobias is coming to see you." " Oh, God." "This should be interesting." "We gotta play "Hide The Sister"?" "Or do I gotta do that slave thing again?" "Just... just act natural." "Let's get her out." "No, no, no, no." " Peter." "Howie." " Ed." "Who is this?" " This is..." " We were having..." "Well, Mr Sanderson, I can see you are a very busy man." "That's why I really appreciate you offering your services free of charge." "Oh, well, gosh." "Peter?" "Well, see, Mr Sanderson here, bein' the heavenly man that he is..." "God bless you." "Ooh, you got the anointing' on you." "...offered to do the taxes for the Compton Evangelistic Episcopal Baptist Church." "You know, just anything to help Reverend Shack... dlefunt." " Just call him Shack." " Shack." "Anyway, I'll let you guys go." "I'll see you at choir rehearsal on Thursday at seven." "I'll escort Mrs..." "Shackdle... funt to the elevator." "Gentlemen." "Peter, we're really in a crunch." "I just got word that another firm's in the running for the Arness account." "We need to close this deal." "Look, I have no problem being Peter's wingman on this one." "Thanks anyway, but I have it under control." "Don't worry about a thing, Ed." "Good." "Then I'll expect you to wrap it up in a day or two." "That's the plan, certainly." "Well." " Could you?" " Sure." " Thank you." " She can't tee up her own ball?" "I've been playing this game for many years." " That's what it feels like." " It's all about patience." " Well, you beat me by 19." " Let's make it 20." "All right." "Mrs Arness, would you like to come over to my house on Thursday" " and possibly look over the contracts?" " I'll have to check with my secretary Julia." "Would you excuse me?" "I just have to check on my children." "Of course." "You do that." "I'd like to dip you in Cheez Whiz and spread you over a Ritz cracker, if I'm not being too subtle." " Boy, you are some kind of freaky." " Oh, you have no idea." "You got me straight trippin', boo." " What are you doing here?" " What does it look like?" "I'm on a date." " On a date." " She's..." "She's on a date?" " She's a felon." " Hey, what is she doing here?" "Get used to it, Twiggy." "You'll be seein' a lot more of me." " Not without a broom in your hand." " It'd only be to sweep up the white trash." " Save it for the YMCA, Jemima." " Bitch." " I'm gonna kick the bulimia out yo' ass!" " Are you ever temperate?" "Go back to the vodka bottle you crawled out of." "Mrs Arness is here." "I am sheltering you, helping you." "Remember?" "All right!" "I'll let it ride." "All right." "Thank you." "That is wise and mature." " Now get her walking that way." " Let me show you the place, Charlene." "Lookin' good, Lois." "Hey, freak boy, I'm gonna make myself a little more luscious for you, OK?" "I'll be right back." "OK, precious." " What are you doing in here?" " I told you you was gonna see more of me." "I came here to warn you." "You keep disrespecting me and it's gonna get rough." "Back off, Shaneequah." "You don't scare me." "You know what, that's it." "You must need a little more eye shadow." "Come on!" "You messed with the wrong WASP, bitch." "Compliments of tae bo, two hours a day, five days a week." "Compliments of the hood, 24 hours a day, all my life." "You know, for a skinny white ho you're pretty tough." "And I don't ever wanna have this conversation again!" ""The girl had dou ble." ""Double-D cups."" "There you go." "You got it, little man." ""I put my mouth" " on her nip..." ...ple." "What is that?" "What are you doing letting him read..." "He read." "You read." "Georgey, you read." "I'm gonna kill you." "I'm so proud." "I'm turning you in." "I found it in your drawer." "Well, I am a grown man of 54... 49, and he's eight." "What I read in the privacy of..." " How'd you do it?" " God, I'm never gonna get this done." "The boy don't look carefully at the details in a word, so most of the time he's guessing'." "What you gotta do is just slow it down and give him somethin' stimulating' to read." " Dad, what's a rack?" " It's a country." "Well..." " I was just doin' it cos he was bothering' me." " Well, either way..." "Can you get rid of this?" "All right, just put it back in my room cos I have a special trash." "Well, Mrs Kline." "How wonderful to see you." "Come in." "It's girls' poker night." "Where's my little dealer?" "Just wait right here and I will go get him." "Georgey, Mrs Kline is here." " Hi, Mrs Kline." " Come on." "I'm gonna teach you to bluff." "We need to comb your hair differently." "You look like a fag." " I'm not a fag!" " I didn't say you were." "Hello." " Good evening, sir." "Hi." " Wait, wait, wait, wait." " Dad, I don't want you to freak out, OK?" " Why would I freak out?" "Well..." "Dad, this is Aaron." " Hi." " Hello." "How do you do, sir?" "I'm so glad to actually meet you." "I told Sarah that it was very important that you feel comfortable with me taking her to my parents for dinner." "So this is a date?" "Oh, I'll have her home by eleven at the latest, sir." "I guess that'd be all right." " All right." "Did it work?" " Like a charm, my friend." "Sarah, let's party." " Hey, watch the seats." " Shut up." "I'm serious." "It's leather." "Look at you, all growed up." " There's nothing to eat in the house." " You comin' to a point?" "I'm hungry." "Are you?" " You askin' me out?" " Well, no, I'm not." "Yes, I am." "OK." "Oh, look at the legs on this wine." "I'm tellin' you, this place is banging." "Don't you just mean "This is nice"?" "Why the word "banging" make you so uptight?" "If you just deign to speak English, with what you learned in prison, you could be a paralegal tomorrow." "Please." "Like they'd beat down my door to let me in school." "In fact, you're exactly the kind of person they want." "Why would I wanna do that anyway?" "I've been to your office." "Everybody's all uptight, overworked, tired, don't see their family." ""Ooh, Ed is coming", "Ooh, Tobias." I get a wedgie just walkin' in your office." "It's what people do." "They work." "Look, I did the confinement thing for four years." "If you're so concerned about my future, just help me clear my name." "I got it from there." "I got my own dreams, my own goals." "Give it to me..." " What'd you do that for?" " You work too much." " That's my phone!" " Probably why your wife left you." "OK, Oprah, if you're good at relationships, where's your boyfriend?" "I had one." "It's just I haven't seen or heard from him since I went in four years ago." "Were you in love with him?" " Let's go dance." " No, I don't." " When is the last time you danced?" " At my wedding." " I can dance, it's just that I don't wanna." " Show me what you're workin' with." " I can dance, I just don't wanna dance." " You can't dance." " Well, I got moves." " Let me see." "All right, I'll show you." "One last little drink here." " What, you gotta pee?" " This was big in high school." "Man, you can't dance from your brain." "You gotta feel it." "Come on, show me how you made them kids." " What the hell?" " How's this?" "It's great for an epileptic." "Come on, you gotta get pelvic with it." "Move them hips." "There you go." "Be smooth with it." " I'm sorry." "I can't help it." "I do, I miss him." " Snap out of it already." "I'm snapped." "I'm snapping." "Oh, God, Ashley." "I still can't believe you were hit by a car." " You call a lawyer?" " I can't talk to a lawyer." "I was jaywalking." "So can we just stop..." " What?" " Oh, my God." "What?" "Look at that." "God." "It's true." "Look at that." "Look at that." "He never danced like that with me." "I'm gonna go talk to him." "No." "Sit!" " Why?" " I can't tell you." "If I talk about it, gangster people will come to my house and cut me." "He almost looks like a fun person." "It must have been me." " Was it me?" " No." "Stop beating yourself up." "It's him." "Can we just get out of here, now?" "You know what they say:" ""Once you go black, you never go back."" "Could we get the check, please?" "That's why I worked so hard, so I could give Kate a good life, but it backfired." " Man, bitches don't care about that shit." " Bitches do too care." "I'm gonna tell you a secret." "Sometimes I drive by our old house and just look at it." "I just remember our life, but it hurts." "That is so pathetic, but you know what?" "I'm gonna help you get her back." " How?" " First we gotta create a mood." " Just like at the restaurant, baby." " I'm already there." " Yeah." "Gotta feel the Barry." " Feel Barry White." "Talk like Barry!" " OK." "That's Barry." "This is Kate." " Hey, Kate, baby." " I want you to talk nasty to her." " Talk nasty!" "I'd like to... kiss you a lot." " Cut that sensitive shit, nancy boy." " What?" " You gotta be a beast." " A beast?" "Yeah." "A woman wants a man that knows how to ride her when she bucks." " Ride 'em when she bucks!" " That's right." " I can't." "It's a sculpture." "I just can't." " All right." "OK." "Use me then." " Huh?" " Grab these." " What?" " Grab 'em!" "Oh, I get it, yeah." "Hey, Kate." "You've been waiting for this for a while, huh?" " What you gonna do to her?" " I'll tell you what I'm gonna do." "I'm gonna give you an aromatherapy massage, with incense." "No!" "Come on now." "Wimps give aromatherapy massages." " Tell her again!" " All right." "I'm gonna have... sexual intercourse, baby." "No." "You're a beast." "You need some of these - cojones grandes." "Yeah." "I'm gonna put 'em in my pants." "Get in there, boys." " Now grab 'em." " Grab 'em." "Yeah, hey, baby." " Now what you gonna do?" " Mama, you gonna be my tawdry woman?" "Damn right." "Now get to humpin'." "Not bad, huh?" "How'd you like me to pounce on you like a lion, from above?" "I like it." "That's what I'm talkin'." "You ain't just no king of the jungle." "You own that jungle." "That's your pride." "You own that jungle and ain't no one gonna come around disturbing' your pride." "You ain't ready for that yet." "Come on now, be a beast." " And when she starts riding'?" " I'll take care of it." "You're mine, Kate." "Ride that lightning rod!" "You got your own." "You found your balls." "Yeah, I don't need those balls." "I got my own balls." "Mandingo!" "What goes on in your personal life is not our business." "But if it affects the firm, we need to call attention to it." "Guys, we were moving a statue, and we lost our footing, and we fell." "My sister's under the impression that you were humping your nanny." "I was not humping my nanny." "Peter, surely you understand that if Mrs Arness were to suspect any instability on your part..." "There is no instability in my home." " You can trust him?" " He's helping reopen my case." "Y'all got any leads?" "A still from the bank's camera's on its way." "And we found a deposition that could help." "That's cool, baby." "If there's anything I can do to help, anything, you just holler." " I gotta run." " Hey, Widow." "If you meant what you just said, it's not gonna be an easy job." "I know it ain't." "I just gotta know that if things get rough, you're not gonna run out on me." "I been waitin' four years for this." "I ain't gonna mess up." "Planning another heist?" "No." "Why would you say that?" "I don't know." "Maybe it was hearing the words "job" and "hot" bandied between two tattooed people." "Peter, that was just my old boyfriend I told you about." "Widow?" "He's just tryin' to get back with me." "I'm tellin' you the truth." "Look, I just didn't want you to see him because..." "Widow, he ain't been the best boyfriend, and I knew you'd be all over me." "Now you suddenly care what I think?" "No!" "Maybe." "A little bit." " No more late visits?" " Word." " Convicted felon's honour?" " Innocent convicted felon's honour." " Now give me some of that." " What do I do?" "Right there." "Then come up..." " Hello." " Dad." " Hey, sweetie." " Is Charlene there?" "Yeah." "You wanna talk to her?" "You OK?" "All right." "Girl talk." " What up, doe?" " I need you to come pick me up." " I can't talk about it." " Where you at?" "I'm on the corner of Venice and Canal, and there's a whole lotta people out front." " Please don't tell my dad!" " Just calm down." "I'm comin' to get you." " I didn't know who else to call." " It's cool." "What's goin' on?" "Hey, Sarah, what have you been up to?" " Ain't that your boyfriend?" " No!" "That's not my boyfriend." "I liked his friend Mike." "We hung out a few times and he was always nice, but then..." "All he wanted to do tonight was have sex." "He moved in kinda rough..." "He got rough with you?" "Where he at?" " I don't know." "He moved back..." " Go wait downstairs." "Yo, Mike!" "Please don't kill me!" "Oh, God!" "What?" "Are you crazy?" "Pull me up!" "What do you want?" "Sarah!" "Mike has something to say to you." " Say sorry." " I'm sorry." " Say sorry twice." " I'm sorry!" "God!" "I am sorry." " Say "No means no."" " No means no!" " She was where?" " Calm down." " She is 14!" " She's 15." "Wait!" "Look, Sarah don't need a warden." "She needs her father." "You." "So you can't get mad." "All right?" "You do and she'll never tell you anything again." "All right." "I get it." "Just be cool." "Just play it cool, you know what I mean?" "Just listen to her." "Let her do the talking." " I am listening to you!" " Thank you." "Don't trip." "Don't trip." "So... you went out with a boy." "And he took you to a party where kids were... drinking, and... trippin' on E." "And then he took you up to a room, where he tried to..."get all up in that"." "Which he... didn't?" "And then Charlene came..." "in my new car, and brought you home, after first... bitch-slapping him." "Well... that was some night." "Oh, Dad!" " I can't believe you're not killing me." " No!" "This is so great." "I want everything out in the open." "I have so much more to tell you." " Kate, what are you doing here?" " What are you doing here?" " It's my short cut home from work." " No, it's not." " Yes, it is." " Is not." "I thought you were in the mountains." "Well, yeah." "I came back early." "The bears were mauling the campers and eating them." "Wow." "But, other than that, nothing went wrong with your..." "Oh, no, no." "He's great." "Yeah, I liked him." "So how's your...?" "My what?" "Life." "Anything hip?" "New?" "No." " I'm having a good time with the kids." " Good." "Glad you're having fun with her." "Them." "What?" "You look, um... rested." "Nice." "You look nice." "So I guess I'll come by later and pick up the kids." "Oh, I was wondering if I could keep them through Friday." "Really?" "You're not too busy?" "No." "Well, yes, it's OK." "It's wonderful, Peter." "You know, if you wanted to come ov..." " Go ahead." " Sorry." " Hello?" " Get your butt home." " I will be home in my own time, girlfriend." " No." "Come now." " Iron Ass say she on her way over here." " I forgot all about that." "Oh, I'm sorry." "I have to go." "I just forgot about something, but I wanna continue this conversation." "So I will call you, or you can call me on my cell." "Bye." " Is she here yet?" " No." "Place is a mess!" "We gotta clean this place up!" "Hey, get upstairs and get ready." "What are you reading?" "Get up there." "Go, go, go." "While we got this minute, something I've been meaning..." "It'll have to wait." "Kids, she's here!" "Mrs Arness?" "Oh." "I'll get right to the point, Mr Sanderson." "Rumours are circulating that your personal life and your home are in disarray." "And this makes me feel very unsettled." "I don't know who misinformed you, but come in." "I'd hate to think you're under any misapprehension about me or my family." "Sarah, Georgey, you remember Mrs Arness." "So lovely to see you again." "Father, when you have a moment, would you mind helping me with my report on Queen Victoria?" "Sure, kitten." "And don't forget, Pop, tomorrow you have to help hand out the food to the poor kids." "Have I ever forgotten to help the poor kids?" "No, Pop, never." "In truth, Mr Sanderson, you have a lovely home." " Thank you." " And your children are well-behaved." "They're angels." "Oh, William." "Oh, look." "He's even taken a fancy to your boy." "That's so sweet." "We can get the contracts if you..." "What is that heavenly smell?" "That would be Charlene preparing dinner." "The contracts..." "Do you know, I haven't smelt home cooking like that since I was a child." " Really?" "Anyway..." " Brings back such happy memories." "Does it?" "Anyway, actually, the den is closer..." "Your table looks so inviting." "Yes." "It's too bad it's so small." " Small?" " Well, actually it's big, isn't it?" "It's a big table." "So... there would be room for one more." "If it's not an imposition." "Let me check if there's enough food." "I'm not sure because, actually, this is the night of..." "Yeminum, the... holiday where white people eat very little portions because that was the night the Lord came down and he was given too much food." "He said no, so he had a smaller portion." "That's why we might not have enough." "I'll just check on what the Lord would say." "If there was ever a time I needed a favour, it's now." " OK, you got it, baby." "Anything." " Thank you." " Mrs Arness?" " Yes?" "Hello." "Yes?" "My family and I invite you for dinner." "Well, I wasn't expecting this." "But if you insist." "Then afterwards we can sign the contracts." " Of course." " Dinner is served." "I was raised in the South, you know." "That smells just like our Ivy's jambalaya." "She was so wonderful." "We paid her nothing, of course, you know." "But then, people had standards of service in those days." "And, of course, Ivy did know that you serve from the left... and collect from the right." "Don't... stop that story because I love hearing about your past." "That is fascinating." "Ah, yes..." "Well, anyway, as I was saying..." "Yeah, fast-actin'." "Fast-actin'." "Oh, I'm gonna get you." "I'm gonna get you." "I'm gonna serve you from the right." "Or was it the left?" "The right?" "Father's work with the Pasadena Republican Youth Group has truly been invaluable." "I hope y'all brought your appetites." "I brought mine." "Oh, my goodness." "This is much too much for me." "I'll never get through all that." "I have a little less here." "I'll trade with you." "Thank you." "What, Charlene?" "Nothing, sir." "Serves him right, making me wear this stinkin' outfit." "You're very lucky to have found such talented help." "Our Ivy was with us for so long, we really thought of her as one of the family." "After every meal my mother would scrape all the food we hadn't eaten and put it on one big plate and give it to Ivy." "Charlene, what is that particular taste?" "It is delic..." "It's familiar, yet..." "Is it some kind of herb, like sage?" "No, it's more like a milk of mint." "Whatever it is, the taste is explosive." "Well, good, then." "Enjoy." "Just one moment." "You know, there's a lovely sad Negro spiritual... that Ivy's brother used to si..." "Are you all right?" "Anyway, Ivy's brother used to sing this when he came in from the tobacco fields." "Mama" "Is Massah going to sell us tomorrow?" "Yes, yes, yes" "Mama" "Is Massah going to sell us tomorrow?" "Yes, yes, yes" "Mama" "Is Massah going to sell me tomorrow?" "Yes, yes" "Oh, watch and pray" "Now, there's a second verse." "If you'd like to join in the chorus..." "Mama" "Is Massah going to sell us" "In Geor...?" "That's an unusual feeling." "Dad, are you OK?" "Hallelujah!" "I hope your father's all right." "Does this happen often?" "Well, if you'll excuse us." "Georgey, let's go watch that biography on Francis Drake." "Well, he seemed to be so moved by that song." "He moving' all right." "William?" "What...?" "...fugitive at large, Charlene Morton." "Charlene is an African-American female, 31 years of age, 5'6", 175Ib, with a tattoo on her left breast." "Convicted of armed robbery, Charlene is considered cunning and dangerous." "Having escaped from a correctional facility outside Los Angeles six days ago," "Morton is suspected to be armed." "This bank tape shows Charlene wielding a gun and holding a customer hostage." "Charlene is considered dangerous, and may be armed." "If you have any information concerning Charlene Morton, contact an FBI office." "That's it for tonight's edition of Criminals At Large." "Good night, and be safe." "Mrs Arness, I can explain everything." "Look, before you lose it, let me explain." " There's nothing to say." " I didn't do it." "You have to get out." "All right, I'll get my stuff." " You saw her, and where is she?" " I don't know where she..." "Don't drop the soap." " What does that mean?" " I don't believe this." "I'm worried." "I hate that she's out there alone." "You're worried about the poor creature who can't take care of herself?" "What about me?" "Tobias is gonna fire me!" "Another goody - if Arness calls the cops, I could go to jail." "Here's the number for the Bureau." "The FBI takes harbouring fugitives very seriously." "You gentlemen will be the first to hear from me." "Arness called the FBI." "You haven't seen me." " I have seen you." " I mean, you haven't..." "I'm looking right at you." "What...?" "Peter?" "If you do hear from her, please, tell her the cool points are out the window and she's got me all twisted up in the game." " Why you messin' with 'Lene?" " I'm not." "I'm helping her." "Bullshit!" "I'm telling you the truth!" "Listen up." "You do not reopen this case." "From now on, I'm handling it for her." "The case is closed." "Why would I...?" "Stay out of her life." "If I gotta come back here, things are gonna get bloody." "Maybe I should just finish this now." " We have to find Charlene." " I thought you hated her." " I found out she's innocent." " I knew it." "I knew it." " How am I gonna find her?" " Well, you can call her." "How can I call her if I don't know where she is?" "I gave her your phone, in case..." "My new cellphone?" "You gave her my new $600 titanium cellphone?" " Good idea." "Come on." " What happened to your head?" "Metropolitan Museum of Art." "How may I help you?" " I know who set you up." " What?" "Who?" "Get in." "So what's up?" "He puts a gun to my head and tells me not to reopen the case." "I think "Why?"" "And then it dawns on me, it's because he was involved." "God damn him!" "I can't believe Widow did this to me!" " Where do you think he is?" " I don't know." "Probably downtown at this club he hang out at called the Down Low." " We gotta get a confession." " You can't go there." "Hey, man, I'm serious." "A white man at the Down Low is either a cop, a corpse, or a crackhead." " You can't even talk hood." " I'll figure out something." "And Howie told me to tell you that the cool points are out the window and you got him all twisted up in the game." "Really?" "That's the nicest thing anybody's ever said to me." "I'm gonna drop you off here because I gotta get back to the office." " So I'll see you in a little bit." " All right." "OK." "Cool." "Here, freak boy." "I need a ride." "Can you come down?" "Damn!" "Arness straight cold pimp." "Looks like Gendler beat us to it." "I can assure you, Mrs Arness," "Peter Sanderson is no longer affiliated with Tobias, Kline and Barnes." "Good." " You have great ankles." " What?" "Were you a dancer?" "Er, well, yes, I was." "I bet you had great presence." "How you two doin'?" "I hope I'm not interrupting anything." "You nasty." " What are you doing here?" " Please, I'm not here to cause any trouble." "That would be a first." "Julia?" "Julia!" "Julia a little tied up." "Please, I just need you to hear me out for a minute." "Peter is not responsible for any of this." "I am." "The guy is a great lawyer." "And he's one of the most decent men I've ever known." " I doubt that's saying much." " Shut up, fool!" "If you knew the lengths he'd go to to help a friend..." "Listen, sister." "Sister?" "Go back to Sanderson and the jungle-fever thing you got going before I call the cops." "Listen, pretty boy." "You ever met the big hurt?" "The who?" " My God!" " I wouldn't do that if I were you." "And why not?" "You'll be instantly returned to prison, where you belong." " All right, that's it." " How dare you?" "To hell with what I just said." "You're one of them hard-learners." "Howie." "This is my house!" "I will not be told to do what I..." "William!" "I'm Kate Sanderson." "Have you seen my kids?" " What is going on?" " It's just the FBI, Mom." "Yeah, they're just doing a search." " For what?" " Well, for Charlene." "But..." "The FBI is looking for your nanny?" "Excuse me." "Homeboys?" "Say yo, you got a bathroom in there?" "Say yo, what's the dealio?" "Who's yo' daddy?" "Back that booty up and put 'em on the glass." "Anybody here dig what I'm sayin'?" "So... your nanny was doing time... for... armed robbery." "And then she broke out of prison." "And then she came here." "But she's innocent." "And now your dad has gone off to... help her." "Sounds crazy, right?" "He's not the same guy any more." "Yeah." "He's really cool." "Say, any of you homies holding' an extra jimmy hat?" "Cos I'm all about crunchin' some of that boo fanny tonight." "If you harm one hair on that dog's head..." "Yeah, yeah." "You got me all nervous." " Hello?" " Sarah." "Hey, Charlene." " Put your daddy on the phone." " He's not here." "He went to find you." "He went to find me?" "All right." " Flip a U. We headed downtown." " Downtown's where I live, precious." " What's on your mind?" " You been drinkin' that Hate-orade?" " What's up, flava?" "Where you from?" " From the hood and misunderstood." " How's your pimp hand, dog?" " Strong, baby." "Strong." "Can you swerve, snowman?" "Do I got "honky" spray-painted on my forehead?" "Course I can." "Then dance with the woman." " I can't." "I got bidness." " Get your groove." "No, I can't." "I got important bidness to take care of." "You'll get a life sentence for this." "You're a kidnapper and a whore!" " Keep talking, tea bag." " Oh, tea bag!" "You'll be gumming your bubbles and squeak." "Damn, boy, you lookin' all kinda stupid." "Really?" "Cos I got this outfit from your mama." "Yo, Eminem, cut the wigga shit." "You don't know how much trouble you're in." "Fine." "Fine." "I'm here to talk business." "Private business." "What fresh hell is this?" " I don't see him." " I think he's in that back room." "What do we do with Her Majesty?" "Sit down." "Sit it on down." "Now, look, if you move, little Willie gonna be bridge-divin'." "You dig?" " Dig." " All right." "Come on, Howie." "Is that real?" "Er, seven and seven, double." " How you doin'?" " What?" "!" "I said, how you doin'?" "Oh, fantastic." "You either the dumbest cracker or..." "Hold that thought." "I love this song." "You think you don't ever have to quit" "You think that you can get away with it" "Turn that off." "Get everybody up outta here." " He is definitely in there." " OK, all right." "So he's in there." "And then you go in." "Then what happens?" "Three seconds." "Why you here?" "You're still sitting on some stolen cash." "You wanna hide it, you need a lawyer." " What's this?" " I'm calling in the cavalry." "You'll go back to prison." "You wanna help me launder my money?" "I can use an untraceable account in the Cayman Islands." "All I want is 100,000." "We both walk outta here wealthier men." "And I tell you where Charlene is." "That simple." "You wearing' a wire?" "Me?" "No." "Are you?" "And then they kidnapped me." "And they took my dog William." "That's a damn shame!" "Oh, you don't care." "You smokin', grandma?" "Why not?" "That's bad stuff!" " To hell with your proposition." " Hold it." "Charlene is ready to roll over." "She knows your accomplice." " That's funny." " I'm not kidding." "They're in the parking lot, waiting for my signal, and..." "And the signal is, if I don't come back, they call the FBI." " There was no accomplice." " There was a girl in the photo." "No." "There was someone in a wig and a dress." "You." "You left her clothes, the gun and the money." "See?" "You just too damn smart for your own good." " We can't wait no more." " Wait, wait." "Charlene!" " Widow wanna see me." " Says who?" "Says 'Lene." " Pete!" " Well, ain't this a psychic moment?" "I was just coming to see you." "Widow, you know this is between me and you." "Let him go." "No problem." "Shit!" "Come on, now." "What are you doin'?" " I got it." " Aim it, aim it." "Who got the gun now, huh?" " Yeah!" "Who got the gun?" " Not so tough now, huh?" " Asses on the ground where I can see 'em." " Check him out!" "Pussies!" "Wasn't that fun?" "I'm just gonna roll up on outta here." "Thank you." "FBI!" "Everybody freeze!" "Charlene!" "Charlene." "Oh, baby." "Oh, baby!" "Charlene." "Son of a...!" "Drop the weapon!" "Drop it!" "Oh, Charlene!" " What?" " Damn, dog." "Hey, Howie, she's all right." "Charlene!" "Do me a favour, don't ever scare me like that again, or I'm gonna have to give you a nasty spanking, if I'm not being too subtle." "He's such a damn freak." " Are you Sanderson?" " Yeah." "Wait." "Wait." "She's innocent." " Save it." " I can prove it." "Mr Sanderson, that was pretty ballsy." "You'd make a hell of an agent." "Thank you." "But I didn't do anything that an ordinary man..." "Thanks again." "Mr Sanderson." "There you are." "You have behaved... abonedably." "Abona..." "Abobinab..." "Abominably." "Yes, I know." "Shakespeare." "And I'll have you dis... disbobbed." "Dis... balled." " Disbarred?" " Disbarred." "That's it, yes." "Oh, to hell with it!" "I do believe I'm stoned." "Just don't tell anybody you ever saw me like this." " Mrs Arness." " William!" "God, you are an ugly dog." "And heavy." " Here." "I got him." " Thank you." "Is there a 24-hour diner around here?" " I know where one is." "I'll take you." " I'm dreadfully hungry." " You guys OK?" " What do you think?" " Yo be cool, g-ma." " Yo all that, g-ma." "Fo' sheezy, homey." "That's not good enough." "Keep trying." " Arness will only talk to Peter." " Then we'll have to keep him around." " Hey, guys." " Peter." "Did I mention I'm going out on my own?" "You don't have the resources." "Well, I have one multibillion-dollar client." "That's a start." " And a partner." " I'm all over it, G." "Let's go." "Excuse me." "Peter, we can talk about this." "Ed, you can kiss my natural black ass." " Peter!" " Ashley, who are you doing here?" "Oh, I was meeting..." "About her aunt's estate." "There was a codicil." "Well, say goodbye to half your stuff." "I'll call you." "Looking good, kids." "Almost there." "Peter, your four o'clock's waiting in your office." "I don't have any meetings today." "I'm sorry." "I didn't realise I had an appointment." "So, this is how big-time tax attorney lives, huh?" "This place is big pimpin', P Diddy." " How you doing?" " I'm a'ight." "I really wanted to tell you again how much I appreciate what you did for me." "If I could only give you half of what you've given me." "We'll call it even." "Now give me a hug." " White people don't hug." " You ain't white." "Well, I'm off-white." "Good to see you." " Kate." " Hi." "Um, oh, well..." "I gotta finish up some things with Howie." "Oh, Kate, this is Charlene." "Charlene, this is Kate." "Hi." "You've certainly been shaking things up around here." "Well, shakin' is what I do best." " It's a pleasure to meet you, Kate." " Thank you." "And take care of him for me." " Hi." " Hi." "So..." "What brings you down?" "I mean, not what brings you down?" "But I mean, what brings you down here?" "Well, I was just wondering... how often do you take that short cut past my house?" "Technically?" "Well, pretty much every day." "Well, you know, technically... that's stalking." "It's kinda cute." "Kate..." "There's something I wanna say to you." "The cool points are out the window and I'm all twisted up in the game." "What does that mean?" "It means I love you." "Hold still, or you'll have these beads all over the floor." "Yeah." "There we go." "All right, halfway done." "What d'you think?" "Holler at your boy." " Nothin', it's nothin'." " Who's yo' daddy now?" "Boy, you are some kind of freaky."