"I am the Lexx" "The most powerful destructive weapon in the two universes" "Lexx 2.13 Twilight" "They're getting in." "I can see that, I have eyes." "I know you can see it." "Look, I'm gonna need more wood, OK?" "And bigger pieces - this is burning down." "Where do you think I'm going to get wood?" "We're already after burning every stick of furniture in this stinking hole." "Lomea, sweetheart." "Help your mother find some wood, OK baby?" "There's none left." "We're all gonna die." "For once in your life would you just do something that somebody asked you?" "!" "We've used everything!" "Find something, OK?" "Find something yourself!" "Use your heart!" "That's made of wood, isn't it?" " Get the robot to look." " Certainly, miss." "No, he's too slow, we don't have time for him!" "No, no, no, we don't have time." "Don't make me put my hands on you." "Now - this is a matter of life and death, missy." "I don't care." "I've had enough of this!" "Get over here, you sack of pus!" "Don't call me a sack of pus!" "Sack of pus." "Sack of pus!" "You're the ones who got us stuck here - and that's only because everyone you've ever met knows you're such creeps!" "Lomea!" "?" "I'm gonna burn myself!" "I wish you were dead!" "I wish I were dead." "Look, we're all gonna be dead if you don't get off your adolescent ass and find some wood!" "I hate you!" "Both of you!" "I really don't mind when she calls me a creep, but I don't like it when she uses those terms to refer to you!" "Me too!" "I just wish for once she'd call you what you really are - beyond repulsion." "A DNA disaster, a mewling mass of mucky... blech... a bald-headed bobo " "Honey, let's face it " ""creep" is a little bit of a compliment to you." "Why, I oughta burn you, you castrating shrew!" "Too bad we're running out of wood, isn't it?" "I think you'd be more comfortable in your bed, Stan." "Stanley?" "How long has he been asleep?" "9 hours, 23 minutes and 13 seconds, dream girl." "He doesn't look good." "I'm worried about him." "I'm not." "Hidea!" "Lomea's right." "Look, there's no point in fighting anymore, we might as well just lie down and die out of it." "Hidea, Hidea - once again the sun has come up, and we didn't get eaten!" "Oh, isn't that great?" "What's your big plan for tomorrow night, baldie?" "Ungrateful bitch." "I love you, sun." "I love you, sun." "I love you so much, sun." "Lay your beams on me!" "Stanley Tweedle has an elevated level of hydrogen peroxide in his blood." "He is suffering from skeletal and muscular degeneration, and his immune system has broken down." "Furthermore, he stinks." "It is unlikely that he will live much longer." "I suggest we wake up Lyekka so that she can eat him." "I believe Lyekka prefers healthy living things." "Stanley may not be acceptable to her in this state." "What's causing his condition, 790?" "I have no idea." "Are you telling me the truth?" "Of course, Xevolicious." "If Tweedle dies, then you will be the only living protein left for Lyekka to consume, so it is temporarily in my interest for the security guard to remain alive." "Then what's wrong with him?" "I do not contain a full complement of bio-diagnostic data - but I do gotta a whole lotta love." "His ailment is unusual." "I too cannot precisely determine its cause." "We must seek specialised help." "Where?" "Stan?" "Stanley." "Talk to us, Stan." "If he dies, we can't control the Lexx." "Before I die, Lomea, I want to give you these pearls - but I can't, because I love them so much!" "Look at this - wood!" "Oh, you're doing a really good job there, Roda." "I think that basket is really going to protect us from them." "Well at least I'm doing something." "Sun's gonna set tonight, like it does every night, and one of us is trying to do something." "And you know, I'd like to thank you from the pit of my heart, but what difference does it make?" "We are all going to die!" "Now could you please sit down out of it for a moment, so I could enjoy my last few minutes on this benighted hellhole?" "Did I say harder to you?" "Harder, did I say harder!" "Lomea, what are you doing?" "I wanna look good when I die!" "There's not enough sun for that, sweetheart." "Shut up!" "Hey, don't start in now, OK, I've had enough of both of you." "Chip in here!" "Did you hear her?" "She said shut up." "You shut up!" "You shut up!" "Shut up!" "Can anybody hear me?" "Can anybody hear me?" "This is a medical emergency." "We are the crew of the Lexx." "Our captain is critically ill with an unknown condition, and we seek help." "This is it!" "This is it!" "Our ticket off this hellhole!" "Took long enough." "Oh, don't " "Please, don't ever, ever, touch me like that again, please!" "Lomea - get your father's cape." "Hello, Lexx." "I am Roda, High Governor of the planet Ruma." "I know the planet Ruma." "How?" "I have the memories of the last Divine Shadow, and he knew the planet well." "Also, a very experienced medical type person." "Hello." "I'm Hidea." "Did you know that Ruma has long been famous for its health giving properties, that emanate up from the minerals deep in the planet's soil?" "Is what they are saying true?" "It is not untrue." "Yes, for years now, many of the rich and powerful have been coming here to participate in the holistic elements that are in the ground here." "If we can't help you, you're probably dead already!" "Do you have diagnostic medical equipment?" "Oh, yes." "This is my robot 792,." "fully equipped with all of the latest biological data circuitry and probing facilities." "He certainly has a nice body." "We will transmit our co-ordinates." "There is no need." "We know where Ruma is located." "We'll be waiting for you!" "Is Ruma dangerous?" "It - may have been, before the Divine Order collapsed, but it should not be dangerous now." "In any event - we do not have much choice." "You're right." "Come on, Stanley." "Come on, get up." "Stanley - you have to help us to get you to planet Ruma." "No room - all full up." "Stanley, tell the Lexx to go where Kai directs him." "Tell Lexx?" "Tell Lexx, tell Lexx" "Stanley, say "Lexx, go to Ruma"." "Lexx - go to Ruma" " go to" " Ruma..." "Ruma." "As you command, Stan." "Whenever a Divine Shadow died, his brain was removed, and his body was sent to Ruma for burial." "Why Ruma?" "The planet's core contains an unusual combination of elements which emit an isotopic frequency of low level radiation that " "somehow manages to keep the bodies in a semi-living state." "Radiation?" "Will it affect us?" "It is not known to affect the living." "Come, my pretty ones." "High Governor Roda, commander in chief, and keeper of the Divine Ossory at your service." "This is my wife," "Lady Hidea, and my daughter, Lomea." "And the medicinal robot, 792." "Pleased to make your acquaintance, ma'am." "Welcome to Ruma." "So glad to make your acquaintance." "We're very glad you're here." "Xev of B3K." "And you are commander in chief of - who?" "Well, since the collapse of the Divine Order, all of my fellow clerics have left their post, leaving my humble self and my beloved wife, and my beautiful daughter all by our lonesome to deal with the - deceased " "Take care of the Divine Predecessors." " the dead people." "The billowing, clouds." "This man has the uniform of a Divine Assassin." "A former Divine Assassin - he's with us now." "Former, ha ha." "Well - then I guess we'll just take your captain in and, give him mouth to mouth, or something." "But we'll work on him." "The burning hills." "The burning hills?" "Kai?" "I like your dress." "Thanks." "It's lizard skin." "Lizards are cool - especially their tongues." "The billowing clouds that puff and flower" "Are calling me to an ancient bower." "Kai, what are you doing?" "I must sing my song." "Don't go far." "Kai!" "I think we'd better have your robot check on Kai too." "He's been acting strangely ever since we got here." "Everybody acts strange around here." "I think he's quite - charming." "Who cares about him anyway?" "I care about him." " Do you do it with him?" " No." "The wheel" "I've completed my analysis of your captain, madam." "He has an elevated hydrogen peroxide level, and his immune system is failing." "Yeah, we know that, but what's causing it?" "I will have to perform a blood profile." "Where'd he get those shoes?" "Your captain is deficient in the element of " "Excuse me for just a second." "I'd like to have a little conversation with Xev." "Since the collapse of the Divine Order - how can I put this?" " our situation has been..." "Delicate." " it has been delicate." "What he means to say is that he got us stuck on this hell and we want off." "Lomea darling, why don't you go pick your pimples, OK?" "She is cute, isn't she?" "What I mean is - ah " "When everyone else abandoned their post on this hideous planet, my husband was rewarded for his loyalty by being left behind." "I'm surprised they didn't kill you." "Who, me?" "Why would anybody do that, kill me?" "The Divine Order were hated by everyone - and you worked for them." "On a lonely outpost." "And in a very very lowly position." "Very lowly." "And no way deserving punishment." "Exactly, and now, what we would like to establish, is if we take care of your medical problem " "What will you do for us?" "What do you want?" "Well - to be truthful with you, we would like it if you could take us away from all of this." "Sure - but to where?" "I thought that former clerics from the Divine Order were not that welcome anymore." "Oh no." "We have many friends, on many many many planets   who will be glad, glad to have us." "They'd be glad." "Fine, we'll take you to the nearest one then." "We agree then - oh, I love your hair." "Oh, robot!" "Madam?" "Yes, please, how is Stanley doing?" "He is deficient in the element selenium." "Selenium?" "A trace element required by certain species such as human beings to create specific enzymes that break down hydrogen peroxide." "It is unusual that his diet would be deficient in it." "What does he eat?" "Only food which is provided by our ship, the Lexx." "It feeds us with stuff that it makes." "Clearly the Lexx's food supply does not contain selenium." "Is the condition fatal?" "Yes." "If he does not get selenium soon, he will die." "So where do we get it?" "High Commander Roda's dandruff shampoo contains selenium." "You must feed it to your captain." "Shampoo?" "Er, excuse me - my shampoo?" "It will be an effective therapy - if consumed in time." "My shampoo?" "Please - don't use it all, OK?" "Well, there's not much there." "He won't require much." "If there's a problem with the food, why isn't it bothering you?" "Oh - we all have different biologies." "Very different, in fact." "I'd say." "Nobody is gonna take us in." "We don't have any friends!" "I know that." "I know you know that." "It's because we're part of your stupid Divine Order." "Wherever we go, we'll be killed." "We will?" "Yes." "Yes!" "Now listen." "It's obvious, isn't it?" "Is it?" "We take the ship and leave them here to feed the animals." "I don't know." "What?" "You don't know?" "No." "Do you have a better plan?" "Well, why don't we just get off the freaking planet before we start getting ambitious?" "This is our only chance." "You saw that the assassin has been affected by the rays from the planet!" "If we're in control of the ship, then we are in control!" "Swings." "Spins." "Turns." "Now what?" "Well, we wait until he gets better, I suppose - right?" "He has swallowed enough of the shampoo." "It will take some time to have effect." "You know" " I think he looks better already." "Xev, is it?" "Why don't you let me show you around, Xev?" "What's there to see?" "Not much - but we've got quite a bit of time to waste." "Now, if there's any change in the patient, contact us immediately, do you understand?" "And Lomea - make us some food." "We're going on a picnic." "Erm - actually, I'm not very hungry." "Outside?" "Outside." "What food?" "I don't know, darling, throw something together." "Swings." "I love a picnic." "Well, thank you, sweetheart." "Oh, well - we're running a little short on food." "We've practically no meat at all." "I wouldn't say that." "Why did they send the bodies of the dead Divine Shadows here?" "I don't know." "They got a thing about the dead, I think." "What?" "Well, for whatever it was they wanted them for." "You never asked questions of the Divine Order, you just did what they told you to do, otherwise you ended up in the protein bank." "Or they turned you into a love slave." "You got the love slave treatment?" "Yes." "Yes, I got the looks and the accelerated libido, but I missed the personality adjustment." "The robot who worked on me got that." "I have an accelerated libido." "Oh yeah?" "So you know how frustrating it can be when there's no men around." " Yes." "Well, I should go and check on Stan." "No, no, no no." "No, my love." "You just relax." "Lomea and I will do that." "Why me?" "Because, mommy's little darling doe, that's what mommy wants you to do." "Well I wanna stay here!" "But we're going to go see the captain." "Yes, mother." "Kids today, huh?" "Another sunset on Ruma - we never take them for granted." "I really should go and see Stanley for myself." "Whatever." "Oh my god!" "The assassin, he's fallen off the cliff!" "What?" "Look!" "Where?" "I don't see him." "Hey!" "Hey, what's going on?" "What's going on, miss cutey pie, is we're taking your moth and we're flying away." "without you." "We made a deal." "I know, and we broke it." "Kai?" "Kai, where are you?" "He can't help you, sweetheart." "What about Stanley?" "I need to see him!" "Gosh golly gee" " I forgot!" "Here!" "Would you like him desperately?" "Here he comes." "He's all yours." "Stan." "Stanley." "You can't leave without us." "You can't fly the Lexx without Stanley, he's the only one who's got the key." "Like I really believe that too, huh?" "Listen, you have a good night, OK, 'cause it's gonna be your last." "Oh, and remember - you can run, but you can't hide." "They are going to get you." "Who is they?" "They are looking for their din-dins, and that's you, sweetheart." "And tonight, you're the main course on the menu." "You're very bad people!" "Oh, that hurts." "I'd love to hang around and chat, but we've gotta go." "Packing and all that." "Ta ta!" "Bye!" "Come on, get up." "Help me, please." "Oh, I don't feel good." "What are they?" "Neighbours." "Where no thing is shall nothing be" "Only then will I be free." "Where's Lomea?" "I don't know." "She's probably sulking around somewhere, lurking" " Lomea!" "What do they want?" "Dinner." "Dinner?" " but we don't have any dinner." "We are dinner." "What - we're what, we're dinner?" "Us?" "Them?" "Oh boy." "Where's Kai?" "He's gone!" "The wheel it turns, it comes around" "It makes an ancient rumbling sound." "Lyekka!" "You're awake!" "I am hungry." "I have to eat." "Unfortunately Stanley Tweedle is not here, but if he were, he'd make an excellent main course." "where is Stanley?" "He and my darling delightful delicious Xev have gone down to the planet with the dead man." "What planet?" "That one." "It does not look very tasty." "I have been waiting for my Xev-orific to communicate with me, but have heard nothing." "Hello?" "Can anybody hear me?" "Is anybody there?" "Stanley?" "The wheel it turns, it comes around" "It makes an ancient rumbling sound." "This is not Stanley." "Where's Xev?" "!" "Get back!" "They're not very strong, you can fight them!" "More importantly - where is food?" "Back!" "Back!" "You know, you can't just leave her behind!" "I'm not leaving her behind, she's leaving herself behind." "Here, look - and give me a hand with this bag, it's heavy." "You carry it yourself!" "I'm getting a hernia from this one." "Get 792 to help you, please." "I've had enough of you." "I don't know where he is." "Look - they're eating the moth!" "Somebody must have let them in." "Yes sir." "I did, sir." "792!" "You're fired!" "I'm sorry to have displeased you, sir." "Are you insane?" "!" "Why would you open the gate?" "I was only following my primary function, which is to care for the former His Shadows." "And look what happened, they ate you." "No sir." "The plant woman did." "What are you talking about, stupid head?" "She's a plant, and she ate me." "That's all I know, except to say that, the experience was strangely pleasant." "That's it." "Will there be anything else, sir?" "Lomea, open the door now, honey." "What do you mean, no?" "I wanted to leave without you and fly away with Xev, but the moth's gone now, so there's no way off." "Open the door." "Lomea, this is not funny." "They're gonna eat me, sweetheart." "Sweetie, darling doe, you don't wanna watch mommy and daddy die, sweetie." "We're all gonna die." "At least I get to watch you die first." "Open the door, darling, listen to mommy!" "No, no, no." "Open the door!" "No, no, you're bad, no!" "They're gonna eat me, Lomea." "Try the suitcase, it's fibre - here!" "Lomea!" "Get up, Xev, go on!" "Back, back - there's too many of 'em Xev." "There's too many." "Back!" "Oh boy." "Oh no." "Oh, stupid zombies!" "They ate the moth!" "Good work, ladies!" "Look - get that!" "My suitcase - tasty." "Kai." " What?" "He's got the only squawker." "Oh, great!" "Go!" "Kai!" "OK." "Leave it, or I leave you." "I'm not leaving my hair products." "Nice move, Lady Hidea." "Xev - what's wrong?" "This bite stings." "Well, just keep it together Xev, please." "The wheel doth turn, it rolls around" "Gather round the wheel, my friends And make amends, and make amends." "Kai, what's the matter with you?" "All this is about to end." "Oh, great - he's cracked, and we're zombie bait!" "The night doth bleed into morn" "Sunlight seeping through the dawn." "Decayed, forlorn." "Kai, please snap out of it!" "What are you going to do, bore the zombies into submission?" "Xev, just get the squawker." "Kai, give me the squawker, we need it to summon the Lexx." "No, that's not the squawker, that's a skull." "The radio." "The little thing for communicating." "You understand me?" "Yes, that's it Kai, just give it to me, there's a good Kai." "No!" " You dumb stupid dead guy!" "The wheel doth turn, it rolls around" "So what are we gonna do now?" "There's a transmitter back in the tower." "Back down there?" "Come on, let's go." "Come on." "I hate you!" "It makes an ancient rumbling sound." "Hello there." " Hello." "Who are you?" " I am Lyekka." "Lomea - and this is my lucky day." "I like you, Lomea." "I like you too, Lyekka." "I need to eat." "Well, we don't have very much," "but - what do you like to eat?" "Many things - as long as they are living and breathing." "Oh - like me?" "Yes." "Or - an animal." "Like - for example - a small, furry animal?" "I love small, furry animals." "So do I. Small, furry," "wet, wild animals." "That sounds tasty." "Oh, it is." "What are you doing?" "I can smell your brain, Stanley." "Stop it!" "Xev!" "I can't think of a better place to die than in your arms." "Do you mean that?" " Oh, yes." "I am glad that you are so eager for me to eat you!" "I've never been so eager." "Make all my fantasies come true." "I will." "Lomea." "The wheel it turns, it spins around" "Fellows, ha ha ha!" "Come, come." "Share with me your tired tales and let my windy words fill your empty sails," "as you travel across grey hills and brownish dales." "Welcome, welcome!" "We have to get to your transmitter and call the Lexx." "If he hears Stan's voice it might be able to rescue us." "No no no." "We can't get to the transmitter 'cause it's in the tower - and Lomea won't let us in." "She'll never listen to us." "But she might listen to you, if you said the right thing she might listen to you." "All right then." "I hope he had his rabies shot." "Lomea, open the door!" "I thought you said it was locked." "It was." "Quick, come on!" "Around the hub, we " "We - ?" "The grinding wheel!" "Can I be of some assistance to you?" "It makes an ancient rumbling sound!" "Round the wheel we lightly prance La la la la la la la la la." "Come on, Xev, you can make it." "Around its hub we sprightly dance La la la la la la la la la - la!" "1002, 1003" "Oh, shut your mouth and save your breath!" "1004, 1005" "It doesn't get any easier I'm very sorry." "We were gonna put in an elevator, but you don't get much money taking care of the dead, you know what I mean?" "Sorry." "Am I in your way, sir?" " What's the name of the ship?" " Lexx." "Hello, hello Lexx, Lexx, come in." "Tweedle - what's going on?" "Where's Xev?" "She's here." "If anyone requires assistance, I'm over here." "Lexx" " I want you to come down to the planet and pick us up, can you do that?" "The island is too small." "I cannot land, Stan." "Can you hover above it or something, and we'll find a way to get up to you." "Tweedle - do what you have to do." "Disembowel yourself and let Xev use your intestines for a lasso." "How long is it gonna take to get that thing here?" "Not long." "We don't have long." "Oh boy." "Lexx, hurry!" "Hurry!" "Look, is there a way, a way to get to the roof?" "Of course!" "Xev, Xev, I'll help you up to the roof!" "Xev?" "Xev?" "Let me go!" "Please!" "Xev!" "No, please." "Oh my, oh my god!" "Oh!" "No, help, help, help!" "What about me?" "Well, somebody's gotta feed them." "No, help me." "Help!" "Much better you than me." "Hello." "Who are you?" "Lyekka." "You must be " "Lomea's mother." "Yes, I am." "Where is Lomea?" "She was yummy." "In fact - delicious." "That's - nice." "And now," "I'm going to eat - you." "No." "I don't" " I mean," "I have thought about it, of course, I mean, who hasn't, really, I just, oh my, oh my - do you find it hot here?" "Lyekka!" "Hello Stanley." "The grinding wheel, it rolls around" "It makes an ancient rumbling sound." "Wait, wait." "You ate Hidea?" "Yes - but she tasted bitter." "I don't wanna know." "Oh good." "You got Kai!" "Wait, wait wait - we can't leave without Xev!" "The fickle fates, the cosmic grind." "Conspire to leave our friends behind." "Oh shut up!" "Lyekka, Lyekka, no, we have to go get her!" "You sure you're all right?" "We are out of range of the planet's radiation." "It is no longer - affecting me." "I'm fine." "But Xev isn't." "Be careful with her." "Oh Xev." "I worship you in any condition!" "Again, please." "Kai - again, please." "A third application is unnecessary." "I have already sucked all the poison out of you." "Let me be the judge of that." "Did - did I eat the High Governor?" "Oh - oh yeah, yeah as a matter of fact you did - his brain anyway." "I ate Lomea and the mother." "Oh, good." "Oh, I feel better now." "Oh, me too, me too." "So - let's blow up Ruma, hm?" "Why?" "Well " "There's no-one living on Ruma." "It would be a feel-good experience for me, huh?" "Yeah?" "OK Lexx - turn around." "Show me that planet" " I'm gonna turn it into granite." "As you request, Stan." "Oh boy." "Oh boy." "I believe that the game is continuing." "Ñèíõðîíèçàöèÿ è êîððåêòèðîâêà:" "DarkLight"