"MAGGIE:" "Your 10-year high school reunion." "Everybody wants to make a good impression." "And I was making mine on..." "Ted?" "Tad?" "Whatever." "(RETCHING)" "I know, not exactly "Most Likely to Succeed", but it's not like I had a law degree to brag about, or a Rittenhouse Square apartment or a fancy job." " Or a job, period." " Man." "Is that it?" "Yes, baby, that's..." "That's it." "ROSE:" "There are women, thinner women, who have lace bras, silk thongs." "Things designed to excite a man." "A thong would look ridiculous on me." "I wear cotton briefs." "My life is about working long hours, planning trips I never take, and settling for love found on the pages of romance novels." "(BEEPS)" "And because things like this never happen to me, the lawyer in me wants proof." "(PHONE RINGING)" "Hold on." " TODD: (OVER PHONE) Is this Rose Feller?" " Who is this?" "My name's Todd." "I'm here with your sister." "ROSE:" "Things like this, on the other hand, happen all the time." "MAN:" "Put them on the side, man." "Those are my shoes." "You know, it is actually possible to attend a reunion and not wind up passed out on the bathroom floor." "1994 called." "It wants its hair scrunchie back." "Oh." "How are the fashionable girls wearing their hair these days when they pick up their drunk sisters in the middle of the night?" "Is that even a dress?" "Just drive." "MAGGIE:" "Shit." "(GASPING)" "(IMITATING THEME FROM JAWS)" " You're drunk." " Shh." "Don't let Sydelle know." "Oops." "I was very clear." "You can only stay here if there was none of your nonsense." " Excuse me, I'm gonna go to bed." " And throw up all over my white carpets?" "Absolutely not." "Take your things and go." " Where is she supposed to go?" " I don't care." " Take her home with you." " No way." "Gee, you two really know how to make a girl feel special." " I want to talk to Dad about this." " Your father's asleep." "My Marcia and her husband are coming for brunch tomorrow." "He needs his rest." "I'm sure if he were given the choice of resting up for your child or talking to his own, he'd choose me." "Did you just raise your eyebrow?" "I can't tell." "It doesn't..." "It doesn't move anymore." "MAGGIE: (IMITATING SYDELLE) "My Marcia's coming for brunch."" "To stuff her anorexic face." "MAGGIE:" "What is this?" "(GASPS)" "Rose Feller," " is there a man in this house?" " Shh." " A human man?" " Shh!" "Maggie." "(GASPS) Ohh." " ROSE: (WHISPERING) No, give me that." " No." " Maggie, Maggie." " (MAGGIE GIGGLES)" " MAGGIE:" "Yummy, yummy." " Shh." "He's cute." "Who is he?" "None of your business." "Well, I for one am shocked" "and appalled." "Shh!" "Don't, Maggie." "Shut up." "Life doesn't have to be this hard, Mag." "If I just prepared a little, you know?" "Maybe went back to school." "Right." "Because that worked so well the first time." "I mean, the literacy place." " Retard U." " If you just went back, finished up there, maybe it'll help you figure out what you're good at." "I know what I'm good at." "Besides that." "You have so much potential." "You do realize I'm drunk, don't you?" "Remember Honey Bun?" "How long did we have him for?" " A day." " Mm." "That was a good day." "Yeah." " Oh, good morning." "Um..." " Hey." " Is that English?" " ROSE:" "Oh, Jim." "This is my sister, Maggie." "She just dropped by last night to visit." "Right." " Good morning." " Good morning." "I'm sorry about that." "It's not a problem." "Hey." "I could've sworn I had some twenties here." "Mm-hm." "Okay." "Sherbet." "Where does she get the time to do this?" "Okay." "I love you." "Mmm." "All right, Rose." "What do you got?" "Oh, shit." "AMY:" "There's a man in this picture?" "Oh, shut up." "I had technical difficulties." "Trust me, look, he's gorgeous and smart and totally smoldering." "Can you make that a full pound of the hot sopressata?" " You got it." " Office romances can go very bad." "Or very good." "Thirty percent of married women" " met their husbands at work." " Where did you get that statistic?" "Made it up." "All extracurricular activity happens off campus." "His place or yours." "Yeah, well, his." "Mine's a little crowded these days." " Maggie." " No." "Just till she finds a job." "You say that like that's something she's remotely capable of." "Why do you let her do this to you?" "Because." "She's my sister." "MAN:" "All right, what's your name?" "Maggie May Feller." "What's yours?" "Some of you with plans for the weekend will unfortunately have to cancel." "The settlement talks for the Donaldson case have broken down completely." "So we'll need to start gearing up for trial." "Simon, put together a deposition schedule today and, Ellen, draft a summary-judgment motion." "I'll need to see that before we file it." "So you'll need to get it to me by Thursday, okay?" "Let's get to it." "Listen, I'm supposed to go to Chicago to do some recruiting interviews next weekend." "But it's my kid's birthday." "Can you go for me?" " Chicago?" " Yeah." " It's cold there." " Oh, come on, I promised I'd be the clown." "I don't know." "If I can drag an associate along to help with the interviews so I don't fall behind." "Feller?" "Any interest?" "Chicago?" "Oh, gee, I don't know." "I mean, like you said, it's pretty cold there." "Well, buy some mittens." "Rose?" "Your sister." "Guess who's in New York waiting for her callback to be the next MTV vee-jay." "Uh..." "Out of curiosity, how much did it cost you to get up there?" "Who cares?" "I'll make it back." "Oh, right, when MTV hires you and makes you a great big star." "Would it kill you to be supportive?" "I mean, would that just send you into "anaphallic" shock or something?" "Anaphylactic, Maggie, not anaphallic." "MAN:" "Maggie May Feller?" "I have to go." " That's me." " You're next." "CASTING AGENT:" "Welcome back, Maggie May." "Thank you." "It's good to be back." "Now, you see the screen with the words on it?" "Just read what it says and just look into the camera and give it that..." "That..." "Personality." "Just let it shine through." "Okay, whenever you're ready." "It's Friday afternoon on..." "Oh." " Okay." "Let's try again." " Okay." "Just relax." "It's Friday afternoon on TRL and..." "Take it back." "It's Friday afternoon on TRL and later today..." "You okay, Maggie May?" "Yeah." "(DOOR OPENS)" "(DOOR CLOSES)" "Well?" "Are you famous yet?" "ROSE:" "A position in retail." "Employment history?" "(VOLUME INCREASES)" "What was your last job?" " Lucky Jeans for three weeks." " Why'd it end?" "Some crazy bitch with a coupon." "The coupon says 15 percent." "Fifteen percent of the total." "Fifteen percent of 42." "Do the math." "What's your problem?" "Okay, well, if anyone asks, just say it wasn't challenging enough." "And before that was the restaurant, right, the Canal House?" "(LAUGHING)" "(CROWBAR CLANGS)" " And before that?" " (SIGHS)" "Before that, the Gap." "Before that?" "The Limited." "Wanamaker's Fragrance, Wanamaker's Accessories." "Come on!" "You really don't wanna do this right now, do you?" "No." "But I also don't want you on my couch for the next three months." "I'll let you do my resume if you let me do your makeup." "Forget it." " Why?" " At some point today," "I have to face the world." "I'd rather not do it looking like a $20 hooker." "Oh, come on, I promise." "You'll still look like you, just better." "Let's go pick out an outfit for inspiration." "Shoes." " I don't have..." " Shoes." "You know, you don't even wear most of these." "Shoes like these should not be locked in a closet." "They should be living a life of scandal and passion and getting screwed in an alley by a billionaire while his frigid wife waits in the limo, thinking that he just went back into the bar to get his cell phone." " These are cute too." " Please tell me you just made that up." "Look, if you're not gonna wear them, don't buy them." "Leave them for someone who'll get something out of them." "I get something out of them." "When I feel bad, I like to treat myself." "Clothes never look any good." "Food just makes me fatter." "Shoes always fit." "(WILLIE BOBO'S SPANISH GREASE PLAYING IN BAR)" "Don't slouch." " Something for you ladies?" " I think we're gonna just take a minute." " Thanks." " I thought I was getting a drink out of this." "Patience." "(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)" "Ew, Maggie, no." "How would you ladies like to join us for something wet?" " What is that?" " It's a vagina." "You know what?" "Sydelle's right." "You're completely obscene." "Why?" "Because I say "vagina"?" "(IMITATING SYDELLE) "Michael, I don't know what's wrong with your girls." ""My Marcia never uses the word 'vagina."'" ""Oh, no, my Marcia doesn't even have a vagina."" ""Oh, my Marcia has a vagina, all right." ""But my Marcia's vagina is made of solid 24-karat gold."" ""My Marcia's vagina is so perfect, it's in a museum."" "(MAGGIE AND ROSE LAUGHING)" "What can I get you girls?" "We'll have two stacks of whole-wheat honey pancakes and a side of bacon, please." " WAITRESS:" "Thank you." " Thank you very much." "Oh, and are you hiring?" "I'll bring an application." ""My Marcia never eats pancakes." ""That's why my Marcia still wears..."" "What?" "I can't believe you just did that." "Did what?" ""Are you hiring?"" "God, Rose, we were having fun for once." " It's an opportunity." " To do what?" "To work the graveyard shift serving pancakes to cops and whores and drunks?" "I think you should work so you don't have to mooch off me for everything." "What are you saying?" "I just got us two rounds of drinks." "No, Cuervo Carl got the drinks and only because he hoped you'd sleep with him." "(SCOFFS)" "Well, I didn't." "You need a job, Maggie." "There's a whole world of commerce out there that has nothing to do with sex." "Where people actually make money without seducing anyone." "Obviously, or you'd starve." "You're not gonna look like this forever, you know?" "Eventually you'll be older." "And then all the men who foot your bill now will be buying drinks for girls half your age, and what are you gonna do then?" "Well, you better think of something, because middle-aged tramps aren't cute." "They're pathetic." "Fine." "What are you doing?" "Sit down, Mag." "Mag?" "DOORMAN:" "Your car is here, Miss Feller." "Thank you." "Hey." "Danvers got busy." "He sent me instead." "Almond croissant?" "Still warm." "Hi." "I was wondering if you guys are hiring?" "Hi." "Shit." "Great." "(SIGHS)" "Shit." "(DOGS BARKING)" "You know about anal glands?" "What?" " Squeeze." " Ew..." "Oh, you get used to it." "Grab yourself an apron." "We got all sizes." "(CELL PHONE RINGING)" "Sorry." "Hello, Sydelle." "No, I can't come right now." "Look, I'll get there when I get there, okay?" "Thank you." "Stepmother." "You can put it all in the basement." "I need this space." "I'm converting it to a nursery for my Marcia's baby." "She's pregnant?" " She will be very soon." " Maggie." " Hey, Daddy." " Hi, baby." " Hi." " I thought I heard your voice." " What brings you here?" " I'm being evicted." "Are you gonna wear that, Michael?" "If you're not, you should change." "We're already late." "Mustn't be late." "Stick around, Maggie, have dinner with us." " Tempting." " Yeah." "Oh, try not to burn the house down." "Don't look at me like that, my Marcia." "(WHISPERS) Shit." "Mike, how do you stop loving somebody" " when they've stopped loving you?" " (KNOCKING ON DOOR)" "We are within walking distance to three of the best restaurants in the city." "I've already eaten." "Grease is not a food group, Feller, all right?" "Bon appétit." "MAGGIE:" "Okay, I'm not gonna start with your butt first, okay?" "I'll wait for us to get to know each other a little better." "All right, here we go." "Come..." "Okay." "Oh!" "Shit." "BEA:" "Here we go." "Oh, God." "(DOG BARKING)" "Oh!" "Truce." "Damn it." "Oh..." "They got you too, huh?" " What?" " They tow on Saturdays." "Great." "Do you know where they take the cars?" "Uh, yeah." "It's this impound lot down on South Street." "I'm parked on the corner." "I'm taking him and I'd be glad to take you too." "Yeah." "If you want." "Yeah, that would be great." "You know, are we..." "Are we in a rush?" "Because I could stand going for a drink." " Sure." " All right, cool." " What's your name?" " Maggie." " Hey, Grant, nice to meet you." " I'm Tim." " Hi, nice to meet you." " Nice way to end your day." "Yeah." "My sister would kill me if she knew I got her car towed." "(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)" " (WHISPERS)" " What'd you say?" "(WHISPERS)" "MAGGIE:" "Where is this place?" "TIM:" "We're almost there." "(HORN HONKING)" "GRANT:" "We're in like Flynn." "ATTENDANT:" "All right, go ahead." " There it is." " GRANT:" "Right on, let's go." " All right." " All right, thanks." " GRANT:" "All right." " So thanks for the ride." "Thanks for the drinks and the fun, and we'll see you guys later." "Well, I mean wait, wait." "Hang on, hang on." "Maybe we can go do something." " It's early still." " No, I'm just gonna go." "But you can't just take the car." "You gotta pay for it." "What are you doing?" "Hey, wait up." "Wait." "TIM:" "Grant." "Leave her alone." "GRANT:" "Oh, God." "(GASPING)" "(GROANING)" "ROSE:" "What the hell is that?" "It's Honey Bun Two." " You bought a dog?" " No, I borrowed him." "I didn't wanna be alone last night." "I had a bad night." "So did I, Maggie." "Several of them." "But you don't see me stealing dogs." "I was scared." "There were these guys and..." " Of course there were." " Look, I got home and you were gone." " I just I don't know." " Plane was late." "Have to be in court in 20 minutes." "I missed two days of work for nothing, which means I'll have to work forever." "Now I'm getting a cold." "So I don't have room in my head for your problems right now." "Just have my sheets cleaned and the dog out by the time I get home." "My car has a boot on it!" "How the hell did my car get a boot on it?" "Oh, I was trying to tell you." "I..." "I used it the other..." "The other day..." "Five years I've had that car, not one ticket." "You use it without permission for two days." " Melanie, it's me." " MELANIE:" "Hi, Rose." "There's an emergency." "I can't get to court." " Can you send someone to cover for me?" " You got it." "Thank you." "You ruin everything." "I can't take this anymore, Maggie." "I can't." "I want you out." "Now." "Today, before I get home from work." " Where am I supposed to go?" " That is not my problem." "You are your problem." "You figure it out." "SECRETARY:" "Lewis, Dommel and Fenick." "How was Chicago?" " Cold." " Sorry I couldn't swing it." " Things were crazy around here." " Yeah, I know." "I work here too." "You know, Jim, if you say you're gonna be in Chicago, you should be in Chicago." "And if you can't make it, if you know you're gonna send Simon Stein in your place, then pick up the goddamn phone." "Bitch." "(KNOCKING ON DOOR)" "(DOG BARKING)" "It's okay, Honey Bun." "Shh." "Is Rose here?" "Nope." "(KEY CLICKS IN LOCK)" "(WHINING)" "(EXHALES SHARPLY)" "(MOANING AND GIGGLING)" "Ohh." "Rose?" "Rose?" "I liked you." "I really liked you." "She won't even remember your name." "In fact, she can't even spell it." "Can you, Mag?" "Give it a try." "Come on, sound it out." "Ji im." "Jim." "Pretty, but real stupid." "Shut up, you fat pig!" "Did you honestly just say "you fat pig"?" "You are my sister and the best you can do is "fat pig"?" "(YELLS)" "Get out of my life!" "(DOOR SLAMS)" "Is there anything I can do?" "I want 200 bucks." "That's the going rate, isn't it?" "When's your next train to New York?" "12: 18." "(INFORMATION SIGN CLICKING)" "Mrs. Lefkowitz?" "MRS. LEFKOWITZ:" "All right, already." "Sorry, I thought it was my son." " I'll get my list." " Okay." "I didn't know your son was here." " That's wonderful." " Yeah, well." "He said he wants to see me." "And where is he now?" "He's on the beach looking at bosoms." "MRS. LEFKOWITZ:" "Hey." "Lewis?" "What's the matter?" " You look like you just had a stroke." " Hi, Mrs. Lefkowitz." " Oh, hi, Ella." "Hi." "I didn't see you." " Hello." "She's invisible." " You look confused." " Well, who needs all these choices?" "It's soap." "I say, when in doubt," " go for the simplest box." " Ah." "You know, Sharla taught me almost everything." "Cooking, dishes, how to use a cell phone." "Never got around to the laundry." "You must miss her." "Mm." "Every day." "You?" "Well, I didn't know your wife, so, no, I can't say that I do." "Oh, finally a date with Lewis Feldman." "What do you mean?" "He's had his eye on you since he got here." "That's ridiculous." "He has not." "Anyway, it's not a date." "I'm just helping him with his laundry." "What do you think dates look like around here, bungee jumping?" "Believe me, it's a date." "AMY:" "At least she's gone." "Where did she go to, anyway?" "I don't know." "My dad's, I guess." "Well, that's good." "Give Sydelle one more thing to complain about." "Which one are you crying about, the predatory prick or the shit-for-brains tramp?" "Because neither one deserves your tears." "You know, Amy," "I'm sure you're right." "But sometimes I wish you'd just say," ""Boy, that sucks." ""And I'm really sorry it happened to you."" "Do you have them for every high holiday?" "Yeah." "The Passover one says," ""What makes this tochis unlike any other?"" " (MOUTHS) Funny." " My son, the joker." "Thinks it makes up for the fact that they go to her parents on the holidays." "Well, at least he's married." "My son, 55, still single." " Gay?" " I wish." " Immature." " Ella, tell me about your family." "Well, my husband, Ira, was in real estate." "Died three years ago, cancer." "(CHUCKLES)" "That's funny?" "No, it's the way we do that dead-spouse intro." "Name, rank, when did he die, how." "But not the specifics." "Cancer's okay, but no one ever says "lung cancer."" "Or, God forbid, prostate cancer." "How about you?" "Have any kids?" "No." "No, I don't have any children." "WOMAN:" "Rufus?" "Is that Rufus?" "Is Shirley back from Europe already?" "Ooh, I thought she..." "I thought she was boarding Rufus for another month." "She is, yeah." "I just walk" "Rufus." " Oh, you're with The Elegant Paw." " No." " No, I'm..." " Hi, Carol." "I'm freelance." "A freelance dog-walker." " I see." " Yeah, I work for kennels, with kennels..." "And with..." "For individuals too." " It's just what we need." " Absolutely." "How much do you charge?" "Jesus, you saved my ass." "Where did you find him?" "Oh, just wandering around Rittenhouse." "You know, I give this girl a job." "She seems normal." "Next thing I know, she's taken off with this dog." "You can imagine, something like this gets out and I'm out of business." "So how does 200 sound for a reward?" "Fair enough?" "I don't want a reward." " What are you, a saint?" " No." "I was thinking, maybe, instead of a reward, you could offer your clients my dog-walking services." "Exclusively." "We could split the proceeds." "Not so much as the Winnebago he left her." " (PHONE RINGING)" " Oh, it's horrible." "You won't be laughing when you're eating government cheese." "Hello." " Hello?" " MAGGIE:" "Is this Ella Hirsch?" " Yes, it is." " Did you have a daughter named Caroline?" "Yes." "So are you on vacation or..." "Yeah." "Hmm." "Well, we've been having wonderful weather." "I'm so glad you called." "I'm so glad you're here." "(CHATTERING ON TELEVISION)" "Mrs. Lefkowitz, this is my granddaughter Maggie Feller." " Hello." " Hi." "Well, you must be starving." "I can fix you something to eat." " No, that's..." "I'm fine." " (TELEVISION TURNS OFF)" "I just..." "I'm really tired." "Oh!" "Well, let me show you the guestroom." "It's right through here." "This is the bathroom." "And I'll put out clean towels and a washcloth." "The bed's made up." "And there are extra blankets in the closet." "Is my grandfather around?" "Oh." "No." "No, Ira passed away over three years ago." "So you'll call me if you need anything?" "Yeah." "Hey, you said you didn't have children." "I said, "I don't have children."" "I had a daughter." "Her name was Caroline." "She died." "What was she like?" "Well, she was..." "She was exactly like that." "Same eyes." "Same skin, same face." "Identical." "But she had health problems." "She had mental-health problems." "Well, how did she die?" "Car accident." "A leave of absence?" "Why?" "I'm just not happy at that firm." "So, instead, you'll be walking dogs." "And running errands." "I think it'll be fun." "Are you okay?" "You're not having..." "What?" "If you ever wanna talk to someone, Rose..." "I'll pay for it, no questions asked." "If you're ever feeling..." "Crazy?" "I'm not the one you should be worried about." "How is Maggie?" " You haven't seen her?" " No, she's still with you, isn't she?" "Oh, yeah, she is." "She's fine." " Thanks for the coffee." " See you soon?" "WOMAN: (ON RECORDING) The number you have called is no longer in service." "If you feel you have reached this... (YAWNS)" "Well, good morning." "Did you sleep well?" "Fine, thanks." "I have English muffins here." "I can make you any kind of eggs you'd like." "I don't eat breakfast." "Oh." "I drink coffee." "So..." "My goodness, this is a surprise." "Such a lovely surprise." "After all this time." "Yeah, what's up with that?" "I beg your pardon?" "Well, were you always out of the picture, or just after Mom died?" "Oh, your grandfather and I were never out of the..." "I mean, we were always there." "We..." "And even after your mom died, I wrote birthday cards every year." "And I never heard back." "Yeah, I know." "You wrote for a while." "I just found them." "What do you mean, "just"?" "I guess they got waylaid." "Thanks for the money." "You're telling me that your father never gave you my cards?" "Mm-mm." "What must you have thought?" "I thought you both were dead." "Does this place have a pool?" " Oh, sorry." " Whoa." "Whoa, whoa, whoa." "Whoa." "Come on, hurry." "Hey, check this out." " Fellas." " Incoming." "Hey, guys." "(SPEAKS YIDDISH)" "Where did she come from?" "Hi, sweetheart." "Come on, come on." "Come on." "(PANTING)" "I don't believe it." "(CHATTERING)" "Rose." "Rose Feller." " Oh, Stein." " How are you?" "Man, you look great." " Not sick at all." " Why would I look sick?" "Oh." "That's one of the rumors." "There are rumors?" "(BELL TOLLS)" "How about that?" "Lunchtime." " Hey, how does Japanese sound?" " I'm not hungry, Stein." "Oh, there's no such thing as not hungry for sushi." "Come on." "We'll bill it to one of your old clients." "Thank you." "You eat everything?" " What do you think?" " Okay." "Two orders of uni." "One masago." " Two tako." " WAITRESS:" "Okay." "Two hamachi." "And then, also, that cod thing that was a special once, but it's not on the menu anymore?" "You know?" " Tara." " Yes." " Okay." "Thank you." " Okay, thank you." "Thanks." " You just ordered for me." " Yes." " What am I, 12?" " I'm an expert orderer." " It's a gift." " Is it?" "Absolutely." "What was the last great restaurant you went to?" " I took my sister to Le Bec-Fin." " Uh-huh." "And you both got the snapper, right?" "Close." "I got the snapper." "She got three rum and Cokes and the sommelier's phone number." "Okay." "Well, I'll take you there and we'll get the foie gras with Roquefort stuffed fig," "Scottish wood pigeon with cabbage and porcini cassoulet." "And the chocolate mousse with raspberries and hazelnut macaroon." "You'll wanna eat with me for the rest of your life." "WAITRESS:" "Here you go." "ROSE:" "Mmm." " The special, tara." " Thank you." "Enjoy." "So what are the other rumors?" "Ah." "Um..." "Rumor one, mysterious illness." "Rumor two, headhunted by Pepper  Hamilton." "Here, try some of this." "Rumor three?" " Um, soy?" " Oh, come on." "What's rumor three?" "Affair with a partner gone bad." "Don't worry." "Most people are betting on lupus." "Here, wasabi makes everything better." "So, uh, what time Friday?" " Friday?" " Dinner." "Oh, look, Simon, this was..." "This was really nice, but I don't think that..." "Seven it is." "Thank you." " That smells good." "What is that?" " That's braised veal." "Shit." "There's a paper towel on the counter." "Out of curiosity, how long is this vacation of yours going to last?" "How come you don't have any pictures of my mom around?" "Don't you like thinking about her?" "I don't need to have a picture to think about my daughter." "You put out pictures, people ask questions." "They expect you to tell them everything and I don't do that." "Because Mom was sick?" "Because she's gone." "Is that why you pulled away from us?" "So that you didn't have to talk about her with us either?" "I didn't pull away." "I was pushed." "No, listen, I'm not the one who didn't pass along the letters." "That was your father." "I'm not the one who didn't want a relationship." "He said that? "I don't want you to have a relationship with my daughters."" " Oh, yes." " When?" " At the funeral." " Why?" "Why would he say that?" "Because he's irrational." "Yeah." "He blamed me for everything." "Every bad day, every bad episode." "He did not want me near her." "And after she was gone, he didn't want me near you or your sister." "I just wonder." "If you had tried harder, you know." "Or, like, tried again after he'd gotten over the whole" "shock and grief of it." "You know?" "Because it would've been nice having a grandmother." "Nice and..." "Maybe a little less lonely." "She sounds like a manipulative little nincompoop." " The girl lost her mother." " So?" "You lost your daughter." " It's not the same." " It's worse." "A parent burying a child goes against the law of nature." "Well, so does a grandparent abandoning her grandchildren." "You said yourself he didn't want you around." "What were you supposed to do, break down the door?" "Yes." "Shoelace." "For Caroline?" "Yes." "Caroline." "She was gone, cookie." "You pushing your way into that house wasn't gonna do a thing for her." " She wanted me there." " You don't know that." "Yes, I do." "I know." "How?" "I just do." "How?" "I've never told anybody this." "Not even Ira." "I'll take it to my grave." "Probably tomorrow." "(CHUCKLES)" "It wasn't a car accident." "I mean..." "It was a car, and..." "There was a crash." "But..." "How do you know it was on purpose?" "She wrote a note." "It came the day after the funeral." "What'd it say?" "One line." ""Please take care of my girls."" "And you didn't." "You didn't, because you couldn't." "Now you can, so you will." "Ella, bubeleh, you did the best you could in a very bad situation." "You got nothing to feel guilty about." "And you tell that to Miss Hotsy-Totsy Pants." "(LAUGHS)" "So this is where all my boyfriends have been coming from." "SIMON:" "They took a vote." "I don't know who I pissed off, but somehow I lost." "Or won." "Either way, it's official." "I am the captain of the softball team." "Yeah." "Look, I know this isn't my business, but I can't not say anything." "You have rights, legal options for getting your job back." "I don't want it back." "You don't?" "I thought you loved it." "You were always the first one there in the morning" " and the last one to leave at night." " I know." "Not because I loved it." "Then why?" "I don't know." "Maybe..." "I was scared of what would happen if I wasn't there." "What, like the place would fall apart without you?" "With law freaks like you there?" "Never." "No, I wasn't worried about the office." "I guess it was more me." "I mean, what would happen to me without those people to please and those tasks to get done?" "Like, maybe those were the things holding me together." "And without them I'd fall apart." "But you didn't." "I guess not." "So, what does hold you together?" "For me, it's the law, politics, the Sixers and good food." "If you ever wanna join me for a game or a meal," "I hope you'll give me a call." "Ella?" "Oh, I was just looking for..." "For what?" " Sorry, I'm..." " Wrong dresser." " It's in the sock drawer." " What is?" "My cash." "That's what you were looking for, right?" "That's what you want?" "No, God." "Oh, well." "I guess after being absent for some 20-odd years or so," "I can't expect you to wanna have a relationship with me." "How much?" " How much what?" " Money, Maggie." "How much money were you hoping to get from me?" " I don't know." " Yes, you do." "I wanna go to New York." "Maybe act." "I think I'd be good at it." "Clearly." " How much do you need?" " Three grand." "That you would not have found in the sock drawer." "How much do you have?" "Well." "I won't give you $3000." "But I'll do this." "They need help over at the assisted-living center." "You get that job, stop loafing around here like some princess, and I will match what you earn, penny for penny." "You would do that?" "Why?" "Because I'm your grandmother." "WOMAN ON TV:" "Oh, I don't think so." "The last time I ran anywhere was to my wedding." "Look what happened." "I spent most of the next week in bed." "Is that Corinne?" " No." " Who is it?" " Maggie." " Have we met before?" "There's a pick-up line with a little dust on it." "Fine." "What's your sign?" "I've been out of the game for a while." "What, like 70, 80 years?" "Give or take." "Where's Corinne?" "She's my number-one girl." "Excuse me, but what does Corinne have that I don't?" "She reads to me." "You could do it." "Maybe nose her out of first position." "Here." "I'm a little busy right now." "Maybe you should wait for Corinne." "SIMON:" "Hello." "Are the Sixers basketball or hockey?" "SIMON:" "Come on, Eric." "Yeah, baby!" "Yeah, baby!" "That's what I'm talking about." "Get back." "Get back." "That's Reggie Miller." "You gotta get him." "(CROWD BOOING)" "He'll make it every time." "Boo, that's right." "Boo!" "Good." "(CHATTERING)" "MAN:" "I can't believe we lost the game." " Why?" "We've been losing all season long." " That's right." "We need a three-point man, a man who can shoot the pill." "I don't care if you have the best shooter, you gotta get back on defense." "You need to put points on the boards too." "Look at the best teams in history." "The Celtics, the Bulls, the Lakers." "All great defensive teams." "Offense sells tickets, but defense wins ball games." " He's right." "Without defense, you won't win." " Thank you." "(SNIFFS)" "I see you're a fan of the classics." "Um..." "What?" "Oh, that." "That..." "That's my sister's." "Oh, okay." "I hope you like cheap, almost stale red." "It's my favorite." "What's she like, the sister?" "She's, you know, a sister." "You don't wanna talk about your sister." "I didn't say that." "I don't wanna talk about my sister." "Cheers." "So, what's he like, this Captain Jack?" "SIMON: "His fingers tangled in her curls," ""while his tongue plundered the soft cavern of her mouth." ""She made no protests." ""Her furnace was alight." ""Jack drew his lips from hers and urged her forward," ""so he could take one shirt-veiled nipple into his mouth." ""Kit's gasp urged him on." ""He licked the material until it clung to the right peak," ""then drew the turgid flesh deep into his mouth." ""Kit moaned, her body spasming in response." ""Her eyes were closed, her lips parted."" "Okay, um, embarrassing as this is to admit," "I'm officially turned on." "Does this mean that I'm your bitch?" "Do you wanna be my bitch?" "I have wanted to be your bitch since my first day at Dommel." "That Chicago trip, I was convinced it was all gonna come together for me there." " Was I unfriendly?" " No." "I mean, not compared to, say, Stalin." "I'm sorry." "I was hideous." "It's okay." "You have plenty of time to make it up to me." "(DOGS BARKING)" "Go, go, go." "Come on, come on." "Yes." "Yes!" "(LAUGHS)" "Yes!" "So how's it going with Hotsy-Tots?" "Oh, fine." ""Fine," she says." " What?" " There's no "fine" with grandkids." "It's either the best day of your life or sheer torture." "What do you do together?" "I don't know." " We eat." " MRS. LEFKOWITZ:" "That's it?" "You gotta do things she likes to do." "Read the fashion magazines, surf the Net." "Watch the smut on the cable." " I don't have cable." " No cable?" "And she wonders why she and the girl aren't all buddy-buddy." "I don't need television to build a relationship with my granddaughter." "You're new to this." "Trust me, it's all about Surround Sound." "CARRIE ON TV:" "I just needed a little kiss to make me feel better." " But now it wasn't working." " Thank you." "Maggie." "We're having Cosmopolitans." "Would you like one?" "I wasn't getting the same rush." "Tonight, I needed more." " No, thanks." " Meanwhile, uptown," "Charlotte wondered when relationships had gotten so complicated." "She yearned for the time when dinner was followed by dessert, not lubricant." " Whoops." " (LAUGHING)" "I want to, but I can't." "I mean, actually, no, that's not true." "I don't want to." "Or maybe I do." "I don't know what I want, but..." "I've seen this one." " I want children and nice bedding..." " It's funny." "And I just can't handle this right now." "That night, they made love the Charlotte way." "Polite..." " MRS. LEFKOWITZ:" "Oh, it was wonderful." " I thought so." " Now walk up straight, now." " Thank you for everything." " Have a very wonderful day." " Yes, and have a good sleep and no sugar." " And good night." " Good night." "Well, yeah, okay." "Okay, thank you." "Good night." "What's up with Lewis?" "I don't know what you're talking about." "I say go for it." " Just jump him." " Maggie." "Don't talk like that." "Here." "Half the fun of sex is talking about it." "Well, I guess I missed that half." "You never talked about sex?" "Occasionally, with Ira." "Kind of." "Yeah, but what about girlfriends?" "The first time you got laid." "You had to tell someone that." "It was my wedding night." "It was assumed." "You missed out on one of the all-time greatest conversations in life." "Who'd you tell?" "Rose." "Well, maybe if I'd had a sister." "Even when you were so small, you had a bond that I'd never had with anyone." "Still close like that?" " Sure." " You don't talk about her." "What do you wanna hear?" "We're totally fine." "We're..." "We're tight." "We're thick as thieves." "Let's ask her down." "I'd like to know her too." "You know, I doubt she would come." "She's, like..." "Really busy." "She's a lawyer." "No kidding." "What kind?" "The really busy kind." "AMY:" "What do you do once they've all peed?" "ROSE:" "Give them a brush, take them all home, make sure they have water to drink." "After that." "Then I'm done." "So, what do you do?" "Whatever." "Shop for food, cook for my boyfriend." " I know his name." " I know." "But I've never had a real live grown-up boyfriend before, and I'm gonna use the word as often as I can." "All right, first of all, he's not grown up." "None of them are." "You know, there's a consistency to your cynicism which is truly beautiful." "Just don't be surprised if he turns out to be less than perfect." "And don't be surprised if he doesn't." " I gotta go." " Goodbye." " Have fun." " I'll call you." "All right." "MALE PATIENT:" "You sound too pretty, Maggie, to be cleaning bedpans." " You're right, I am." " I have a grandson, a doctor over in Tampa." "I should introduce you." "You don't wanna do that." "Are you bad news?" "You know, I don't mean to be, but yeah." "Well." "Since you're not gonna marry my grandson, you might as well read to me." " I'm kind of a slow reader." " Perfect." "I'm a slow listener." ""The art" ""of" ""losing..."" " You know, I should just get back to work." " What is it, dyslexia?" " What are you, a teacher?" " Professor, retired." "Just take your time, Maggie." "Listen to the words as you're about to say them." "Nine times out of 10, you'll hear a mistake coming and you'll correct it before you make it." "Then again, you might make a total ass of yourself." "Oh, come on." "Poetry's supposed to be slow." ""The art of" ""losing" ""isn't hard to" ""master." ""So many things" ""seem filed..." ""Seem filled" ""with the intent" ""to be lost" ""that their loss" ""is no" ""disaster."" ""Lose" ""something every day." ""Accept the fluster" ""of lost door keys." ""I lost two cities." ""Two rivers, a contin..." ""Continen..." ""Continent." ""I miss them." ""But it wasn't a disaster." ""Even losing you." ""The joking voice." ""A" ""gesture I love." ""I shan't have lied." ""It's evident." ""The art of losing's" ""not too hard to master." ""Though it look..." ""Though it may look like..." ""Write it." ""Like disaster."" "Well, what do you think?" "Good." "Unacceptable answer." "What's the poem about?" " I don't know." " Yes, you do." "What's it about?" " Losing." " What?" " Love?" " Ah." "And how about that?" "Is the love lost already?" "Is Bishop writing about it as a possibility, a probability?" "What?" "Well, in the beginning, she's talking about losing real things." "Like her keys." "And then she..." "She gets, like..." " She lost a continent." " She's getting grandiose." "Yeah." "And the way she says it, is like..." "Like it doesn't matter." "Ah." "Her tone, would you call it detached?" "I think she wants to sound detached." "You know, she wants to sound like it doesn't matter, because she knows deep down" "how bad it's gonna feel to lose." "Lose what?" "Or whom?" "Is it a lover?" "No." "It's a friend." "A-plus." "Smart girl." "SIMON:" "This is Sydelle." "SYDELLE:" "Oh, what a comfortable home." "Very, uh, lived-in." " Well, what can I get you?" " I'll have a white wine." " And he'll have the same." " Oh, good." "And why don't you just make yourself at home, and I'll be right back." " Hey, Dad." " Rosie." " Where's Maggie?" " Oh, not here." "Oh, thank God." "We don't need her drama tonight." " Why isn't she here?" "Is something wrong?" " No, we just, you know, had a fight." "About what?" " Can we talk about this later?" " SYDELLE:" "Yes." "Bad enough she monopolizes the evening when she's here." "Oh, let me see that ring." "(GASPS)" "Oh, wow, look at that." "MRS. STEIN:" "For you." "For you, sweetie." "Rose tells me you have a daughter as well, Sydelle." "My Marcia?" "You'll meet her." "You'll love her." "Everyone does." " My Marcia's a decorator." " MRS. STEIN:" "Really?" "SYDELLE:" "She's absolutely genius in her work." "I'd like to say a few words." "Please." "To Rose and Simon." "We're all blessed to be a part of your happiness." "Your love bonds not just your two hearts, but the hearts of two families." "Mazel tov." " Mazel tov." " Mazel tov." "Thanks, Dad." " That went okay." " Yeah." "Where's Maggie?" "It's hard to say, you know?" "She moves around a lot." "Well, I wanna meet her eventually." "You know?" "She's your sister." "I wanna know her." "You will." "What was the fight about?" "Girl stuff." "Oh, shit." "Oh!" "I should have used fresh vegetables instead of frozen." "ELLA:" "I don't think so." "They were great." "Really delicious." " They were good." " Really?" "Yes." "So have you heard from Rose?" " No." " So she hasn't gotten back to you?" "About what?" "You were going to invite her down, Maggie." " I don't know where you got that idea." " Maggie, I specifically asked you to." "So?" "Just because you specifically asked, doesn't mean I'm going to." "You shouldn't smoke." "You have a family history of lung cancer." "I have a family history of car wrecks too." "Does that mean I shouldn't drive?" " That is not funny." " It wasn't supposed to be." "What is the problem between you and Rose?" " Why don't you want her to visit?" " Why do you?" "I mean, am I not good enough for you?" "This has nothing to do with you." "She's my daughter's daughter, and I wanna get to know her too." "What was Caroline like with you girls?" "I mean, as a mom, how do you remember her?" "Why don't you ask Rose?" "Maggie, please grow up." "She was special, different than the other moms." "She used to surprise us." "One time I opened up my lunchbox and there was a tiara inside." "A tiara?" "With your sandwich?" "Instead of a sandwich." "What was she like as a daughter?" "No tiaras." "But I loved her so much." "Loving her in the right way was difficult, for me anyway." "I didn't know there was a right way and a wrong way." "Neither did I." "I had ideas." "I had unwelcomed ideas about how to keep her safe." " Like?" " Like" "I thought she should have been on her medication all the time." "I thought that her relationship with your father was far too passionate for her to handle." "And as far as children are concerned, she was in no condition, no condition at all." "So you wish she'd never had me?" "You know what I wish, Maggie?" "I wish I had kept my big mouth shut long enough to hear what she wanted out of life." "Hmm." "There she is." "There's the bride." "Be strong." "Stay right here." "I'll get your corsage." "Corsage?" "What is this, a prom?" " Ladies." " ROSE:" "Oh, thank you." "(GUESTS CHATTERING)" "Who are these people?" "I have no idea, except for my Marcia." "Hello." "Hey." "You're not sticking around to watch me "ooh" and "ah" over a Mixmaster Deluxe?" "It's good of you to let Sydelle do this." "Like gale-force winds could stop her." "Go easy on her." "Marcia's giving her a very hard time these days." "Oh, what's she doing?" "Decorating in last year's colors?" "She joined Jews for Jesus." "Yoo-hoo, ladies, it's time for the entertainment portion of our soiree." "Everyone get where you can see." "Anita?" "Jackie, come on." "Scoot." "Here we go." "ALL:" "Aww." "We who know Rose are so thrilled that this day has finally arrived." "There was a time we had our doubts." "(WOMEN LAUGHING)" "Oh, my goodness." "All that time spent with her nose buried in her book." " WOMAN 1:" "Bookworm." " Of course there were romances." "But for some reason or other, nothing stuck." "WOMAN 2:" "So heavy." "Oh, one thing Rose always had was a great appetite for life." "(SIGHS)" "God." "Why would anyone wanna marry me?" "I'm disgusting." "The only disgusting person here is your stepmother." "She's hideous." "So why is she giving me this party?" "She hates me." "Someone else should do it." "Someone who loves me." "Someone who can look at me and say, "All of this is nothing more than the happiness you deserve."" "Young lady." "Rose Feller, don't you dare walk out..." "I am talking to my friend!" "(SCREAMING)" "She's crazy." "She's crazy." "She's sick in the head." "Hands down, best shower I've ever been to." "Engagement should be a happy time, Rosie." "So should childhood and graduation and happy hour." "Did you know more suicides happen during happy hour than any other time of day?" " Is that true?" " I wouldn't doubt it." "I love you, you know." " Who's Rose?" " There's this thing called privacy, Dora." "This from a girl who puts a postage stamp on her bottom and calls it a swimsuit." "(SHOWER RUNNING)" "WOMAN: (ON RECORDING) The number you have called is no longer in service." "If you feel you have reached this recording in error..." "Hey." "Are you dead?" "What were you thinking, going to the mall?" "The mall is for young people, people with teeth." "Well, my son's finally getting married, and the girl's a ninny." ""Shut up, Ma," he says." ""Just show up in something nice."" " You know what I saw today?" " What?" "Pants with "Juicy" written across the heinie." " I'm gonna wear that?" " Just wear something you're comfortable in." "I haven't been comfortable since the Dodgers left Brooklyn." "What's your favorite thing you ever wore?" " Ever?" " Yeah." "In your whole life." "My going-away suit from my wedding." "Black-and-white checks, very fitted." "I felt like Jackie Kennedy in that suit." "Give me your credit card." "Give it to me." "Can I get you a size?" "No, I'm going to the women's suit department." "So?" "Jackie Kennedy?" "Better." "Jackie Onassis." "MAGGIE:" "That looks so good on you." "You're so great." "Good job." "SIMON:" "You ready?" "I don't know what to wear to a mainline wedding." " Doesn't matter, wear whatever you want." " When the bride's name is Lopey, it matters." "Look." "That looks great." "Come on." " Really?" " Yeah." "Come on, we gotta go." "Okay." "I can't believe you have a friend named Lopey." " Come on, come on." " I'm sorry." "Wait." "Are you okay?" "Because if there's gonna be any stabbing, I need a little heads-up." "I'm fine." "Oh, my God." "Oh, shit, my Jimmy Choos." "Chewing gum?" "Oh, that bitch." "That bitch!" " Okay, no one will notice." " Right, no one's gonna notice that." ""Hi, hi." "Hi." ""Hi." "I can talk because I have a mouth." My heel has a mouth." "No one will notice." "Oh, my God." "What happened to your heel?" "Hi." "Best wishes, Lopey, Jordan." "Thanks, Simon." "MAGGIE: "Let the wind die down." ""Let the shed go black inside." ""Let evening come." ""To the bottle in the ditch." ""To the scoop in the oats." ""To air in the lung." ""Let evening come."" "JIM:" "Can I take that for you?" "I hear you're getting married." "Congratulations." "Congratulations are for the groom." "You say "best wishes" to the bride." "Guess my manners aren't what they should be." "Gee, really?" "Rose, I am really sorry." "I felt horrible about myself for two solid months." "I felt horrible about myself my whole life, so you'll get no sympathy from me." "You know what they called me growing up?" ""Fudgy the Whale."" "I'm still shocked when a woman wants me and sometimes I do really stupid things, because I can't believe I can." " The thing with your sister..." " Was inexcusable." "No matter what you weighed in high school." "You ruined everything." "I know." "What we had was really special." "Oh, please. "What we..."?" "Because of you, I have no idea where my sister is." "I can't reach her." "Her phone's cut off." "She doesn't even know I'm engaged." "My own sister." "My best friend." "And the worst part is, I can't talk to anyone about it." "If I tell my father, he'll get all panicked and mad at me for not taking better care of her." "And if I tell Simon..." "I can't tell Simon." "Why not?" "Because." "He'll hate her." "And that, I couldn't bear." "Hi, Jim." "Here I am, trying to be patient, trying to be understanding while you lose your freaking mind." "I'm not losing my mind." "Ping-ponging between comatose and homicidal." "God, every day I wake up thinking," " "Maybe today's the day she'll come back."" " I'm right here." ""Maybe today she'll look at me like she used to." ""She'll look at me in the eye and tell me what she's thinking."" " Simon?" " But, no." "No, no." "Today's the day you look him in the eye and tell him what you're thinking." "The guy who treated you like a..." "Like a disposable washrag." "This has nothing to do with him." "This is about you and me." "You not talking to me, you not telling me what's going on inside you." "Tell me." "I won't marry you like this." "I won't do it." "So this lady today, she, um..." "She heard about how I shopped for Mrs. Lefkowitz and she asked if I'd do the same for her." " No kidding?" " Yeah." " She said she'd pay." " Well, she better." "Do you think there's other women down here who would?" "Are you kidding?" "Scads." "I was thinking of doing it maybe like a business." "Well, that's an excellent idea." "I'm..." "I'm really terrible at numbers." "I mean, adding and stuff." "Well, I'm good with them." "I can help." "I mean, if you like." "Yeah, sure." "That'd be good." "Gin." "(KNOCKING ON DOOR)" " Oh, no." " Dad?" " Dad?" " You are not welcome here." " Rose?" "You all right?" " Are you kidding?" "I'm fantastic." "Turns out I have a grandmother I never knew about." "It was in your own best interest." "Your father..." "Why are you speaking?" "You do not have any place in this conversation." " Excuse me, miss, this is my house." " Sydelle." "Please." "How did she find you?" "How did she lose me?" "She said she sent birthday cards." "Please tell me you never got them." "Our mother was dead." "Our father was practically catatonic." " A grandmother might have come in handy." " She was impossible, Rose." "Bossy." "Self-righteous." "Nosy about things that weren't her business." " Like what?" " Trust me, we were better off without her." "Because she was bossy?" "That doesn't make sense." "I didn't wanna be around that." "I didn't want you around it." " What?" " The judgment, the blame." "For what?" "What did..." "What did she blame you for?" " Everything." " What everything?" " Just everything." " Dad?" "For your mother, all right?" "For her death." " She said that?" " She didn't have to." "She wanted her protected all the time." "Drugged." "But Caroline, she didn't want to live that way." "It made her foggy." "She couldn't take it if she was pregnant." "So, we hoped it would be enough, loving each other, loving you and Maggie." "There were so many good days." "We thought it would be okay." "Oh, God." "I'm sorry, Rosie." "I'm so sorry." "ELLA:" "Now, um, the only opening on Thursday she has is 5:00." " P.M?" " Yes." "That's right in the middle of dinner." " Well, take it or leave it." " I'll take it if she won't." " I'll take it." "I'll take it." " ELLA:" "Mrs. Stempel." " Ella." " Lewis." "Are you looking for a personal shopper too?" "No." "A date." "To the tea dance, and I'd be honored if you go with me." " I'd love to." " Pick you up at 4." "Lewis Feldman." "This place just keeps getting better and better." "What are you doing here?" "I live here." "What are you doing here?" "You live here?" "In an old folks' home?" "It's a retirement community for active seniors." "Wait, so you..." "You live with our grandmother?" "How'd you find out about her?" "I can't believe she wrote you without telling me." "That's so sneaky." "Does it offend your strict moral code?" "So how's it going for you down here?" "Who's buying your cocktails?" "No one." "Oh, no." "Is your mojo failing you already?" "My mojo's fine." "Just haven't felt like drinking." "Right." "Probably haven't felt like stealing or lying or having sex with inappropriate partners, either." "Did you come down here just to abuse me?" "(DOOR CLOSES)" "Maggie." "I hope you are prepared to be exceedingly rich, because I've booked you within an..." "Rose." "Oh, Rose." "Look at you." "Oh, look how lovely you are." "(ELLA LAUGHS)" "Do you remember me?" "Yeah." "I remember you too." "You're exactly the same, smiley and huggable and..." " Ooh, and engaged?" " What?" "Oh, yeah." "Holy shit." " To who?" " No one you know." "Champagne." "Now come with me." "Tell me all about it." "I can't believe you're marrying somebody I haven't even met." "What's he like anyhow?" "Why, you wanna screw him too?" "I don't expect you to forgive me, Rose." "But I am sorry." "(HORN SQUEAKS)" " Careful, Mrs. Haskell." " I'm always careful." "She hit somebody last week." "It was a big to-do." "And there's a store where you can buy eight different kinds of hemorrhoid creams." "Oh, and here come the queen bees." "Widows, they run the place." "Oh, watch out." "Hello, ladies." "This is my sister." "WIDOW 1:" "Maggie." "WIDOW 2:" "Hi." " WIDOW 3:" "Hi, Maggie." " Yep." "Have a good day." "WIDOW 4:" "Pretty girl too." "This is the exercise pavilion." "Hey, guys." " Hi, Maggie." " This is my sister, Rose." "Hello, Rose." "INSTRUCTOR:" "A good stretch." "That's it." " And left." "Right." " Looking good, Mrs. Klein." " Hi, Maggie." " Hi, ladies." " Hi." " Gonna repeat it now." "Come on." "I call these guys "The Bench." They're all former lawyers." "Gentlemen." "Hey." " LAWYER 1:" "Hi, Maggie." " This is my sister, Rose." " She's a lawyer, too, from Philadelphia." " LAWYER 2:" "Which firm?" "Actually, no firm right now." "I'm just taking some time off." "Me too." "What are you doing, Ella?" "Sit down, girls." "I've got some things here I thought you might like to see." "MAGGIE:" "God." "MAGGIE:" "Look at you." "ROSE:" "These are great." "Hey, look, our old living room." "Oh, God." "Can Mom have been any prettier?" "Oh, you look exactly like her." "Doesn't she?" " I wonder if there's a picture of Honey Bun." " That'd be pretty impossible." " Who's Honey Bun?" " Our dog." " You had a dog?" " For one day." "The greatest day." "Mom woke us up really early." "It was a school day." "It was still dark out." " It was winter." " And she put us in our best party dresses" " and dragged us to the kitchen, which was..." " A mess." "Covered, every counter, in fudge." "She'd been up all night making it." "We loaded it into the car, and she drove us right past school, straight up to New York, to Lord and Taylor..." "Which was closed, because we got there at 8 a.m." " That's right, and we hung out in the car." " Eating fudge for breakfast." "Mom had heard about Mrs. Fields, the cookie lady." "And she figured that her fudge was just as good as those cookies." "So..." "So she was gonna make a fortune." "When it finally opened, we went in and..." "Oh, God." "She was so beautiful." " She was wearing this long velvety gown." " At 8 in the morning?" "Oh, by this time it was 10." "I guess she talked to some of the store people about the fudge." "But I don't remember." "She spilled it all over the jewelry counter." "There was a guy who just looked at her." "I don't remember a guy." "There was a guy, and he looked at her." "Anyway, Mom said that we could each get one present." " And you got..." " A Nancy Drew book." "I asked for a puppy..." "And she got it!" "He was so cute." "I named him Honey Bun." "Why'd you only have it for one day?" "MAGGIE:" "I guess Dad thought it was a bad idea." "ELLA:" "Why?" "I don't know." "I think he thought I was too young." "No, he was just mad." "About a dog?" "Oh, about the whole day." "He didn't have any idea where we were, and school had called." "ELLA:" "Oh." "Really?" "Yeah." "He was really panicked and really, really mad at her." "They had a huge fight." "I don't remember a fight." "You were in your room with a record playing." " I was?" " Yeah." "I put you in there and turned the music on, so you wouldn't hear them." "ELLA:" "Why?" "What were they saying?" "He was saying she was "unfit."" "That's the word he used." "He said he was gonna send her away, put her away, something." "Kept saying "away."" "And her?" ""There's nothing wrong with me." "I'm a good mother."" "He'd say, "Away," and she'd say, "I'm their mother."" "ELLA:" "So he was..." "He was gonna have her hospitalized?" "Yeah." "Oh, God, the poor guy." "When exactly was this?" "November 3rd." "No." "No, it wasn't." "It was like..." " Months before that." " It was two days." "It was Tuesday, and she died that Thursday." "It was on purpose, wasn't it?" "The car." "The tree." "Was it even raining that night?" "You were so little." "How do you tell a 6-year-old her mom left by choice?" "Who told you?" "No one." "Oh, God, why can't I just stay mad at you?" "Because we're a pair." " Like Sonny and Cher." " They split up." "But they remained quite close." "I'm not engaged anymore." "Simon dumped me." "Why are you still wearing the ring?" "I like how it feels." " Do you know his name?" " MAGGIE:" "Simon Stein." " Doctor?" " Lawyer." "Oh, nice." "So you call information, "Simon Stein in Philly."" "Get his number." "Make a call." "And say what?" ""Hey, jerk, you broke my sister's heart." " "Come down here and make it right"?" " Maybe not that, word for word." "He broke up with her." "He's not gonna wanna come." "You don't know that." "Men can be very confused." "Yeah, too many options." "Be an astronaut, be a playboy." "Often a man needs help making the right choice." "How am I supposed to help him?" "He doesn't even know me." "He knows your sister." "And loves her, or he wouldn't have proposed in the first place." " So?" " So, what if he learned she was in trouble?" "Or sick?" "Or pregnant." "Dora." "Don't look so shocked," "Miss Come-to-Florida-to-Milk- Your-Grandmother-for-All-She's-Worth." "We know all about you." "So, dog walking?" "Oh, don't worry about it." "It's not forever." "It's just to keep me busy till I figure out my next move." "Well, when you figure it out, I hope you'll let me know." "You know, down here, if you don't have successful grandchildren to brag about, you're screwed." "What are we reading today?" "A little Emily Dick, a little..." "Did they move him?" "He died." "This morning." "Bummer." " Were you on duty?" " No, I..." "I don't work here." " This is his chart..." " You're his grandson." "The doctor." "Who are you?" "Nobody." "I just..." "I read to him sometimes." "You're Maggie." "He talked about me?" "Just a little." "(BAND PLAYING JAZZ MUSIC)" "(PEOPLE CHATTERING)" " Hey." " Hey." "Who's Fred Astaire?" "That's Lewis." "You're a very good dancer, Lewis." "Know what else I'm good at?" "(GASPING)" "Simon." "What are you doing here?" "I came as soon as your sister called." "Should you be drinking?" "(INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE)" " So you're not pregnant?" " No." " Never were?" " Don't you think I'd tell you" " if I were pregnant?" " I don't know." "You know, I hope so, but..." "Frankly, there were a lot of things you weren't telling me back there." "I promise, anything I kept from you had nothing to do with us." "It was about Maggie." "I was protecting her, because that's what I do." "You need to know this, because if by some insane stroke of fate you do decide to marry me, she will make your life a living hell." "You'll be begging me to kick her out, commit her, kill her, anything." "And I'll want to." "But I never will." "Because without her," "I don't make sense." "You look good." "You look like you." "I can't believe I'm in Florida." " ELLA:" "You'll come back?" " Yes, I promise." " Now, you hold her to it." " SIMON:" "I will." "Okay, don't buy a wedding dress." "It's gonna be my gift to you." "No way." "You'll have me in some hoochie-mama monstrosity." "Look, I'm good at this." "Trust me." "Are you sure this is the right place?" "CABBIE:" "Only one Jerk Hut in Philadelphia, ma'am." " Michael." " Ella." "This is my friend Lewis Feldman." "Lewis, this is Michael Feller, father of the bride." "Pleased to meet you." "Welcome." "Rose will be so glad you're here." "ROSE:" "Ella!" "BOTH:" "Oh." "I'm so glad you're here." "ELLA:" "Are you excited?" " ROSE:" "Yeah." " Yes?" "Perfect." "MAGGIE:" "She gets really mad if you leave the lid off the ice cream." " SIMON:" "I know." " Don't even think" " about using her toothbrush." " No." " And she hates the look of raw chicken." " I know." "And if she starts humming Hava Nagila, she's, like, really, really mad." "Like, mad." "Maggie, I know." "I know her." " Okay." " Okay." "I wore them in 1952." " Old." " But not to you." " Right." " And if I didn't give them to you?" " Borrowed." " Okay." "Look at the flowers." " Blue." " Yeah." "(GIGGLING)" "So, Simon... (CHATTERING)" "I'll be back in a few minutes." "ELLA:" "They are so loved." "You should be very proud." "I'm afraid I can't take much credit." "Well, it's not always easy taking care of yourself and someone else at the same time." "I owe you an apology, Ella." "Many, in fact." "I owe quite a few myself." " Yeah, just along here, down these stairs." " And will someone be escorting you?" "My dad." "Dad." "(WAGNER'S BRIDAL CHORUS PLAYING ON PIANO)" " Thanks, Dad." " Thanks, Michael." "And now a very special moment." "Young lady." "Uh, this isn't in the program, because it's a surprise." "I surprise Rose a lot." "Usually she hates it." "I think..." "Well, I hope she likes this." "It's a poem by E.E. Cummings." "For you." ""I carry your heart with me." ""I carry it in my heart." ""I am never without it." ""Anywhere I go, you go, my dear." ""And whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling." ""I fear no fate." ""For you are my fate, my sweet." ""I want no world, for, beautiful, you are my world, my true." ""Here is the deepest secret no one knows." ""Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud." ""And the sky of the sky of a tree called life." ""Which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide." ""Is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart." ""I carry your heart." ""I carry it in my heart."" "(GLASS SHATTERS)" "(CHEERING)" "(BAND PLAYING BOB MARLEY'S IS THIS LOVE)" "I wanna love you" "And treat you right" "I wanna love you" "Every day and every night" "We'll be together" "With a roof right over our heads" "Oh, look at that." "Now, you behave yourself." "...of my single bed" "Oh, that's sweet." "'Cause Jah provide the bread" "Is this love, is this love, is this love" "Love that I'm feelin'?" "Is this love, is this love..." "You'll make sure Ella gets those?" "Of course." "Seriously, you can't keep them." "(SCOFFS) I wouldn't do that." "He's kind of hot." "Simon." "Not funny yet?" "Oh!" "Bye." "MAGGIE:" "Here is the deepest secret no one knows." "Here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud." "And the sky of the sky of a tree called life." "Which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide." "Is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart." "I carry your heart." "I carry it in my heart." "I got you to wear my ring" "And when I'm sad You're a clown" "And when I'm scared You're always around" "So let them say our hair is long" "I don't care With you, I can't go wrong" "Babe I got you, babe" "I got you, babe" "I got you, babe" "Babe, I got you, babe" "I got you" "You, babe" "I got you to hold my hand" "I got you to understand" "I got you to walk with me" "I got you to talk with me" "You, babe" "I got you" "Babe" "You, babe" "I got you" "You, babe"