"Hurry up!" " What's eating you?" " Stop coughing on me!" "Your hands are all greasy." " And yours aren't?" " No, I washed them." "Here." "God, it's hot." "Hurry the fuck up!" "This is good smack." "How many are you taking?" " Two." "Who gave it to you?" "Climax?" ""Climax"... what a shitty name." "He used to hang out at the Climax, and now the name has stuck." "Hang out where?" "Who's Climax?" "Never heard of the disco Climax?" "No?" "Jesus, Vanda!" "No." "You never went to the Cellar?" "Hurry up and smoke." "Come on!" "Smoke!" "If it'll shut you up." "I'm not in the mood to cut the coke." " Give it here." "I'll do it." " Yeah, right." "Come on." "Give me that." "You done?" "Pango found a place to stay." " Who's Pango?" " Nhurro." "He did?" "Nhurro, Pango, Yuran, Chumbito... he goes by all those names." "He's staying where that girl lived who killed her baby." "Smoke." "God, my back hurts." "Hurry up with that, Vanda." "Smoke to get over the agonies first." "You gonna drink all that?" "No." "Then don't." "Watch it!" "It burned up." "IN VANDA'S ROOM" "Hurry up!" "Fuck, I'm totally wasted." "Come on!" "Scrub hard, man." "Don't be afraid." " Nhurro!" " Not now." "I'm busy." "Fuck!" "Look at that great dresser." "May the Lord help me." "Vanda, get out on your rounds!" "The scissors, Zita?" "I had them." "The old woman had it all over her head" "Me too, but I lost my head" "Here." "Wait a minute." "The strawberries aren't thick yet." "All this fuckin' noise is getting on my nerves." " Is this all?" " What are you talking about?" "Fuck!" "Look at yours and look at mine." "What about it?" "Fuck!" "You try to talk to her and she starts shouting!" "Damn right." "Shit!" "Goddamn it." "Look at the mess in this room!" "Look at the mess in this room!" "It's only the bed!" "It all just needs folding!" "That's what you always say." "It just has to be folded!" "Come clean this room, and Vanda will clean hers." "Yeah, and you'll clean yours." "Everyone will clean their own room, and we'll see who's done first." "One, two, three, go!" "Lena?" " What is it, Anita?" " You got any manioc?" "No, not until Friday." "Not until Friday." "Come in." "Don't touch that!" "It's not yours." "Boots, jeans... you help yourself to everything." "Stop the fucking shouting!" "You're pathetic." "You're a pathetic bitch." " You're the pathetic one." " Fucking pathetic." "Senhora da Luz, you want lettuce or cabbage?" "Senhora da Luz?" "Nuno, you want cabbage?" "See you later." "Beware Noah's Ark!" "Noah's Ark is coming!" "Noah's Ark?" "How am I gonna take these blankets?" "It's not much stuff, mostly blankets, but still..." "Ma'am, you want lettuce or cabbage?" "No, no money." "Thank you." "You don't want any?" "Thank you." "See you later." "Thanks." "Ma'am, you want any lettuce?" "So they pulled your house down, Geny?" "Geny, you'll have to sleep with me tonight." "You poor thing." " Throw that out for me, will you?" " Where?" "In the trash out there." " Go out to the fuckin' highway?" " Come on, do me a favor." "Empty those for me." " Go out to the highway now?" "Do me a favor." " Hold on a minute." " No, do it now." "I'm cleaning this place up." "Empty them for me." "I have to do it now?" "Can't you do that for me?" "Do me a favor." "Don't you see I'm cleaning up so we can feel at home?" "Give me a hand with this." " Over there?" " No, outside." " In the street?" " Yes." "Go on." "Now go empty those for me." "Okay, but let me shoot up first." "The guy went to get the coke, so help me out here." "Okay, I'll do it soon enough." "Let me shoot up first and then I'll go." "Just forget it." "Now you're gonna sit down?" "Don't sit there." "Go sit on the sofa." "On the sofa, out of the way." " I'm fine here." "Sit over there on the sofa." "Can't you see I'm cleaning?" "Lift it up." "Fuck this shit." "My arms hurt." "I gotta go to the can." "Fuck!" "Like this I can't..." "Shit." "You got it?" "Ouch." "Miranda..." "You know who used to live here?" "It belonged to a girl, a pretty thing who tried to sell her baby for 1,500 escudos." "That blond girl who put her baby in the trash can?" "Yeah, I know the one." "Whether she put it in the trash or killed it, I don't know." "Pango, the place has turned out cool, hasn't it?" "It's right on." "Give me a smoke." "Thanks." "Good luck, bro." "This can all go in the living room, where I put all the fruit." "Put it all over there." "I put all the fruit there." "And if you're looking for the red apples, they're under the bananas." "Look, Ma." "Look what I found." "Where?" "Out there." "Ah..." " Ah, what?" " What do you want that for?" "It's an antique, dummy." "Somebody must have taken it out of someone's house." "It's all in one piece, except some wires are broken." "It's an antique, isn't it, Miranda?" "Don't you think I could get at least 5,000 for it?" "Look, it's just the wire that's broken." "Didn't you see it, Ma?" "Out behind the streetcars?" "Just a few wires, but they can be fixed." "Nice, isn't it?" "There's one missing here." "I thought you'd seen it." "It was out there." "I went to get a box and found it there." "There's one missing here." "Look at the wax." "It's wax or oil or something." "Right?" "If Emilia saw it, she'd want it right away." "Don't put it there!" "It's dirty!" "Then clean it." "Get it off the fruit." "Put it down there." "Get it off yourself." "Not there." "We won't be able to reach the TV." "Did you see the ship?" "Over there." "Look." "It's all in one piece." " It's nice." "Hey, that's mine, damn it!" "I left it by the trash cans to clean it." " It was out by the streetcars." " I forgot to go get it!" "I left it there." "It's mine." "Listen, I've got blankets." "Just imagine if I'd been in there." " You'd have come out..." "... burnt to a cinder." "If they'd gotten hold of you and poured gasoline all over you..." "And me crippled, with crutches and all." "I'd have been a goner." "You couldn't even move." "Those boys are bad news." "Evil." "They have evil in them." "They're from Venda Nova, Nhurro's barrio." "There are five or six of them." "Three black guys and two white guys." "One of them was the one from that place where you and I used to sleep." "That's right." "He's the one pulling those robbery tricks too." "He's a sly one." "They thought I was still inside." "And they set fire to it?" "Right." "Pathetic." "If you'd really been in there, you'd still be there." "How would I have gotten out?" " With all the blankets and stuff." " Of course." "Gasoline does the job in no time." "Yeah, and with everything all so dry, you couldn't be out of there quick enough." "It all goes up in no time." "You remember an old sofa there?" " One of them big ones?" " Yeah, up against the drum." "They must have put a match to it." "It burned like straw." "Went up in smoke." "The blankets I had in the drum, the clothes and everything, all fucking gone." " That was pure evil." " Nothing but evil." "And then they..." "They scattered your blankets and stuff all over." "Yesterday and the day before, I was in the drum, and they started throwing rocks at me." "I had to start shouting and pretending they'd hit me for them to stop." "Day before yesterday I was walking past that school up there, and the guy who owned that house where we used to sleep, he and two black girls decided to wait there... and clean me out, you know?" "Because they knew I was tending parked cars." "They got it into their heads that I had money on me." ""Give us some change. "" "I said, "I ain't got a penny. "" ""Jump up and down." "We'll see if you have any. "" "So I jumped up and down, and I had money." ""Empty your pockets!"" "But I wouldn't give 'em shit." "Good thing Vanda's father showed up." "The old guy." "I was lucky he saw it." "'Cause they'd started ganging up on me, and he was there working in a bulldozer." "He came to your aid." "He was working in a bulldozer." "I headed straight for that bulldozer and jumped in the cab, and he brought me down here to Fontainhas." "Goddamn it." "I'll be too cold like this." "Cold, cold, cold" "I feel cold" "Ay, Mouraria" "On the old Rua da Palma" "One day" "I left my heart there" "When he passed right by me" "Oh shit." "With dark skin" "Fine lips" "And a beguiling look" "Vanda, Vanda..." "Leave me alone." "See ya, Nhurro." "You got a cigarette?" "Good luck, bro." "See ya later." "Fatima, give me a Martini, please." " In a glass?" " That's fine, thanks." "Or you want the bottle?" "Thanks." "Vanda." "I heard about your sister Nela." "It's so sad." "Night's coming on." "It's getting dark." "I better go buy some candles." "Here comes Crutch." "Nhurro!" "Oh, God." "Father, help me." " Lena?" " What is it?" "Goddamn it." "Fuckin' shit." "Yuran..." "I'm dying." "Go to sleep, Paulo." "Bad guys like us never die." "It's the innocent who die." "Tomorrow we'll have to do something about your hair." "Is Ma going to visit Nela?" "She already called today." " What did she want?" " Money." " Get out, you bitch!" " I'm not going fuckin'nowhere!" " I'm at the end of my rope with you." " Cunt!" "You have no idea." "And you have no idea how much I hate you." "Get out of my room." " I hate your guts." " No more than I hate yours." " I'll let you have it." " Go ahead!" " Get screwed." " Get screwed yourself!" "You've got the husband for it." "I don't." ""Find a husband. "" "Tell her, Diogo:" ""Find a husband. "" "Ma, this Tupperware is broken." "Ma, the cops will take that cake apart right in front of you." "They have to break it all up." "To see if you're bringing in drugs." "They'll break it all up, crumb by crumb." "And who knows if they'll let the ham by." "Help me clean this room." "Lena, hurry up." "The baby shit in his diapers." "He needs changing." "Where are you taking all this?" "You're going out with your hair like that?" " Put that in a bag for me." " My hands are dirty." "Call Zita." "Zita, put all that in a bag." "They only let those bags in." "The Tupperware containers first." "Put the hot stuff in first, down at the bottom." "They only let those bags in." "Give me the money." "No, put this in first." "Shut up." "Didn't you hear what she said?" " What did she say?" " The hot stuff first." "Hey, Zita." "How's it going, Vanda?" "She didn't even seal this." "You got any bananas, ladies?" "Did you find a place to stay, Paulo?" "Sort of." "Where is it?" "Maybe I know it." "With Blondie." "Some place up the hill, near Venda Nova." "You know, I saw my old lady today." "Did she speak to you?" "Seeing her brought tears to my eyes." "She was digging in the garden, tending her cabbage." "She looked at me." ""You're so thin. "" "Out of shame, I reached into my pocket." "I took out all I had and gave it to her." ""Look at you." "You're all dirty." "Your shoes are dirty." "You're breaking my heart. "" "Then she asked, "Do you get enough to eat?"" "I said yes, which is the truth." ""Now and then I leave some food in the oven to see if you come take it." "I always hope it was you who took it. "" "I can't bear running into my old lady." "It makes me too sad." "Yuran, you'll end up killing your mother." "Don't say things like that." "Paulo, I need to get new needles." "Leave me yours." "No, mine's brand-new." "I just opened it." " "Brand-new"!" "I'll go with you to get new ones later." " How many needles you got?" " Two." "I exchange them in Pontinha." "I exchange them in Pontinha." "I opened one just now and the other one a while ago." "They're both still real good." "They're both good." "If you saw some of the needles I've used." "This all goes in the trash." "You gonna take all day with that?" "I've got some things to do." "Good luck." "Yeah, good luck to you, Paulo." "May the Lord go with me." "What's this?" "Crutch's silver spoon that he eats his yogurt with." "Who is it?" "Don't you look in fine shape!" "It's real degrading." "They treat you like a convict." " Really?" " Like a convict." "Did they take you straight to jail from the station, Carla?" "Yeah." "At 5:00 a. m." "They took me straight to a cell at the station." "Shit." "In the meantime they did that..." "I don't know what they call it." "That "you're under arrest" thing?" "A piece of paper to take me to the women's prison." "I left the station at 9:30 and was behind bars by 11:00." "You can't wear jeans or anything." "You have to wear cotton trousers and an overall." "A blue one?" "Depends." "Different colors." "I'll be back." "It's probably just for the older ones." "No, all the women in prison have to wear that." "All over a few Knorr cubes!" "Fucked, isn't it?" "That's prison for you." "But she had a long record." "Eight years of stealing." "But Jesus Christ, doing time for a few Knorr cubes?" "Where else would that happen?" "Only here in Lisbon." "Three fuckin' years for a few Knorr cubes." "Vanda, didn't you hear what she said?" "She had a record as long as her arm." "Because she was caught so often, and they kept bringing charges." "Three times she was about to get out, and along came another trial." "I know four people who were inside and got out." "Then the cops discover something else, and they go straight back in again." "That's right." "They come and get you." "Take Zeninhas." "He wasn't out a week before they came for him again." "Why?" "More charges, a new trial, and off he went to prison." " How many years did he get?" " Don't ask me." "Shit." "That's really bad." "Worse than bad." "Going to prison." "Fuck, the very thought..." "It's not just that, Maria." "It's going to prison... over some fucking Knorr cubes!" "Where else would you see that?" "Going to prison for stealing Knorr cubes?" "I think she was the first person who ever did time for that." ""I'm doing time for stealing Knorr cubes. "" "That's pathetic." "Our country is the poorest, most pathetic of them all." "So many years suffering at the hands of that man." "After 24 years he left her with nothing." "It's sad." "She went hungry so she could feed us." "I'll never forgive him for that, never." "My dear mother." "Fuck!" "My sister Zita's lucky to be alive." "He trapped her belly, with her almost due, in between two armchairs and almost killed her." "God is my witness." "Geez, that makes me mad." "The N didn't turn out very well." ""No credit today." "Tomorrow. "" ""No credit today." "Tomorrow. "" "This sign is going up if it's the last thing I do." "Is this new house a secret?" "Can I move in with you?" "We won't say a word to Crutch." "You're getting old." "I'm gonna tell her," ""Nela, if you keep on making life hell for Ma, it's the last you'll see of me or anybody else. "" "I wasn't allowed to use the phone." "That's why I never called." "Else I'd have done the same as her, calling all the time." "But you wouldn't ask for what she's asking for, would you?" "I'd only ask for 1,000 escudos..." "in smack, not money." "What would I do with money in the hospital?" "And there was smack all over the place anyway." "Jesus, if I'd known sooner!" "I'll never forget the trouble I went to for a little foil." "All I could think was," ""Those drawers back home full of fuckin' foil, and me here. "" "Know what I did?" "I got hold of one of them iron things that they keep thermometers in." "I got hold of it, put the lighter to it, and, "I can smoke again!"" "I go, "Give me my fix. " He says, "I ain't got no foil. "" "Fuck, I had to find some foil." "I'd have used the fucking bedpan as long as the drops would run." ""Vanda, you're not taking that stuff in there. "" "I was bringing you foil, smack, the whole setup." "But Miranda wouldn't let me." "He took it all." "When he saw me come out with that mask still on..." "They'd caught my hair in the knot when they tied it on me, and I couldn't get it off." ""Miranda, get this off me. "" "This is dead." ""I'm too nervous to get this thing off." "Help me. "" "No one imagined what we had on us." "It's fucking torture, I'm telling you." "The real torture is knowing that other people can smoke." "That's right!" "Knowing that you were going home to smoke." "Fuck, you know what I did?" "I yanked out the drip and everything." "You know how many times I went over to the window?" "I kept falling down." "Thin as I was, I could hardly stand up." "I'd have escaped." "There's nothing but assholes around here." "Nobody helps." "All I hear is "in a minute. "" "Fuck, all you do is make me work." "What do you want now?" "You're pushin' it, you know." "Take it easy." "Let me shoot up first." "Then I'll take the trash out." "But I'm shooting up first." "What would look good here is some nice flowered wallpaper." "Talk about hematomas, man..." "I'm a fuckin'martyr." "Quit your moaning." "I've had loads of 'em." "If you'd taken all the shit that I have..." "Loads of 'em." "Seven or eight." "You'd be scared shitless." "I was a walking blood clot." "I've been jabbed so bad." "One time I just couldn't get the needle in." "This one was a real bitch." "An internal hematoma." "It covered all my tendons." "My leg went stiff." "I was in that vacant lot for three days and nights." "It rained." "The sun shone." "It rained again." "And me lying there under my blanket, until I finally burst it myself." "I was useless in the morning without my Serenals." "But then it got infected, 'cause I'd messed it up." "It was Serenals back then." "I didn't get it bandaged that weekend, and the one in my neck swelled up so bad that on my way to the clinic on Monday," "I began to squeeze it, and the pus was running out." "Without the Serenals I could hardly even walk." "I went to the clinic, and she stuck this huge needle in my neck." "My eyes were popping out of my head." "It was Antral or Anthrax, something like that." "If you ask me, all my hematomas were side effects from the Serenals." "I had two on my chest, on the left and right." "I burst the one on the right." "I have one on my left foot." " Which one?" " Two on my chest." "I had one on my neck and on my leg at the same time." " You had one on your neck." " The one on my neck burst." "No, I mean the one on your neck." "I took antibiotics for that one, straight into the blood." "Give me a drag, Nando." "Serum and all that." "But that was when I went to the hospital after I burst the one on my leg." "After I got back from the hospital, I got another one on my right arm." "What about me?" "One on each foot, remember?" "And one on my arm." "This one here." "So who won the championship that year?" "Benfica." "No, Porto." " I mean the Hematoma Championship." " Fuck you, Nhurro." "What really got to me was the old woman." "She looked like a hunchback, all bent over, with her walking stick." "An old woman in prison." "Get out on your rounds." "It's all old people in there." "But she's free to walk around." ""Bring me smack. " "Yeah, right." "We'll bring you money, but no drugs. "" "But I'll take her a few hits the next time." "I will." "If you get caught, you're on your own." "If I'm caught, I'm caught." "You liked it there that much?" "They have a cafe and everything." "And there aren't bars, like people say." "Just that wire in little squares, like we've got." "And there aren't bars on her cell either." "It's glass blocks." "But geez, what a haul from where they searched us to Block 3." "And finding Nela... like a needle in a haystack." "You can't find her." "She says she has a sword and she's gonna kill herself." "A sword?" "Says she made it out of bedsprings." " Come on." " It's true." "She's crazy." "She's lying." "But I'll take her some next time." "Just tell them it's for your own use." "No, Granny, I'll hide it in my dentures." "It'll fit." "Hurry up and get out on your rounds." "No, their machines only detect metal." "I can't take anything made of metal." "I left her talking with the wardens, with that woman I know." "It was a good thing she was there." " Who?" " A customer of mine." "Just imagine... she's a warden." "When she saw me, she said, "Hey, it's the vegetable girl. "" "I'm going back on Friday." "Senhora da Luz, any lettuce or cabbage?" "Forgive me, but I'm tired." "How many you want?" " One." "Thank you." "See you later." "Nuno, you want lettuce or cabbage?" "No?" "Thanks anyway." "You want any lettuce or cabbage?" "You want any lettuce?" "Shit." "Where'd I put my keys?" "You want any lettuce?" "Damn it, Blondie, stop that." "There's no need." "There's no need." "Please." "I told you that table's staying here." "Stop that now." "If you don't want the table, then I'll take it." "It's up to you." "It's up to you." "The table's staying here." "Blondie, where'd you put the water?" "It's right there." "Stop that now." "I'm sick of that shit." "Jesus... you're a stubborn fuck." "We're taking the white chair too." "We're not leaving that behind." "Is this mirror worth taking?" "For fuck's sake, Blondie." "Blondie!" "I see us spending another night here, and it's getting fuckin' cold." "The plates and utensils were here somewhere." "Don't worry about that." "We have everything there." "Pots, plates, forks." "Everything we need to eat." "Don't worry about that." "And the mattress is good and firm too, and since my back hurts sometimes..." "Then you should sleep on the floor." "On the fucking floor?" "Are you crazy?" "Didn't I just say that the firm mattress is good for me 'cause my back hurts sometimes?" "And you tell me I should sleep on the floor?" "Hey, guys, how are things?" "You got room for me, Yuran?" "No." "That jerk's got some nerve." "What else are we taking?" "Your sneakers?" "You're a stubborn fuck, man." "They're tearing this place down." "I'm not stubborn." "I'm tidy." "There's a big difference." "Being stubborn is one thing." "Being a fucking idiot is another." "Let me finish this." "I like things fucking tidy." "No harm done." "There are loads of people in Fatima on May 13th." "It's a fuckin' gold mine for vendors." "And pickpockets." "For anyone who knows his stuff." "I don't think I've ever been to Fatima on the 13th." "I've been, but not on the 13th." "Here." "Hold on a minute." "Pass the lighter." "May's the nicest month." "No doubt about it." "The month of cherries and of Our Lady." "And Vanda's month." "A classy month." "What's driving me crazy is I can't get Nela out of my fuckin' head." "That's why I don't like going there." "It was my first time inside a prison." "I hated it." "Same thing with hospitals." "I can't get those people out of my head." "Shit." "What awful places." "She came in looking all around, but she didn't see me." "I went, "Nela!"" "The poor thing hugged and kissed me." "You know, if I'd walked out of there like the rest of them..." "They were looking for Vanda." "But Vanda would be outside." "I messed up and put my name where I should have put hers." "I didn't see the word "detainee" or whatever it said." "I didn't read it right, and I put my name, and I put hers below that." "And where it said "relationship," I put "sister. "" "Then I heard the woman on the loudspeaker say," ""Have you got a Vanda on that block?" "Vanda Maria Pires Duarte?"" "And I went, "No, sorry." "I'm Vanda Maria." "My sister is Manuela Fernanda Pires Duarte. "" ""Then you filled this in wrong." "You'll have to fill in a new one. "" "The first block she called was Block 3, where her lordship was." "I didn't know a prison was divided into blocks and numbers and all that." "I only knew it was Block 3 'cause she wrote it on the paper." "Otherwise forget it." "I can't stop fuckin' thinking about her." "It's so fucking sad." "My hair's filthy." "I look like a tramp." "And the dirt makes your hair grow even quicker." "Soap and water... we'll see if that'll wash away all this grime." "I've really gotta wash it." "I've parked cars." "I've been a thief... a street paver." "I've helped out in construction." "I don't know what else... what else I could do in this world." "This is too much." "They're all over the place." "Vanda, how much are the red apples?" "140 or 170?" " 140." "170, right?" "140." "Give me the foil." "Here." "Check on Diogo!" "Zita, go check on him." "Go yourself!" "Damn it." "Maria?" "Wanna buy a silver spoon?" "150 escudos." "Whose place is this?" "Can we come here whenever we want?" "What the fuck you think this is..." "your sister's cunt?" " I was just asking." " And I'm answering... no!" " Aren't you the one with the crutches?" " That's me." " You know who I am?" " Yeah." "Blondie, watch out, for fuck's sake!" " This needle is fucked!" " Then try this one, for Christ's sake!" "The needle keeps on bending!" "Your neck's one big scar." "It's a huge vein, man!" "Yeah, but the needles are fuckin' bent." "Did you press the air out?" "Yeah." "Think I'm stupid or what?" "What's taking so long?" " You done?" " No." "Calm the fuck down, man." " Don't shoot before you're in right." " I won't." "I used to be addicted to coke big-time." "At one point..." "But you're better now, your face and everything." "Your color's better, and you've put on weight." "But I have a real hard time breathing." "Me too." "I can't get enough air." "And I get tired easily." "I walk for a bit and I'm beat." "And I have a cough in the morning." "I'll give you something, but you have to take it." "I will." " Pedro..." " Believe me." "It's what I take when I can't breathe." "I'm really suffering." "If you don't take them," "I swear on my grandmother's soul I'll never help you again." "I'll take one right now." "You have no idea what these cost." "They're capsules for shortness of breath." "Real good." " I can't get hooked on them, can I?" " No." "You know what scared me?" "I thought it might be tuberculosis or something." "Be careful." " We don't eat right." " That's it." "It's what you eat." "And never use other people's needles." "I never do, but at the place where I'm staying," "I got up one night, barefoot, and I got a needle stuck in my foot." "Be careful, Pedro." "Take these to help with shortness of breath, you hear?" "It really scares me." "That and going for the tests." "I take these so I don't have to use the inhaler." "You can get hooked on the inhaler." "You know that, right?" "Where the fuck is it?" "I use the inhaler when I can't breathe." " So you're asthmatic?" " No, it just started." "Well, maybe I am." "Everybody seems to be." "There's you, me, Paulo, and Geny's guy." "Did you hear about Geny?" "So sudden." "Poor thing." "Where the hell did I put them?" "I went over to Avenida do Uruguai." "A woman there, Dona Rosa, helps me out now and again." "She lives on the seventh floor." "I ring the bell, and the door of the building opens." "I walk in, and my face drops." ""Elevator out of order. "" "Lmagine walking up six flights... on crutches." "I had to walk up six flights." "I was fucked." "Absolutely exhausted." "I finally get there." "I ring the bell." ""Dona Rosa, how are you?" "Very well, thanks. "" ""And your husband?" ""Fine, thanks be to God. "" ""Could you help me out a bit?"" ""I'll see what I can do. "" "She comes back and hands me two yogurts." " Handed you what?" " Two yogurts." "Two fuckin' yogurts." "I was fuming." "I was expecting money." "Anyway, I put the yogurts in my bag and prayed the whole way down that they'd be strawberry." "I felt like strangling her." "I never expected... she would be so tight." "You don't want to be rude, but there are situations where you almost have to be." "I hope they're the ones with fruit chunks." "Well, a while back, I hit the jackpot... big-time." "I caught one of them blackbirds." "The gold ones, not the all-black ones." "It was all shiny and colorful." "I took it to the old guy in Urmeira who deals in birds." "Two packets of sugar." "I asked if he was interested in buying it, but he said no." "But when I said it was a gold one..." " This'll go down like honey." "He was hooked and told me to show him." "There should be a spoon around somewhere." "Get it for me, would you?" "He saw the bird, and he was hooked." "He paid me six hits' worth." "There was another bird there, but one of those regular ones." "In the yellow basket." "It's gotta be." "Not one of the gold ones." "Take the candle." "Be a pal." "My leg's hurting me." "He had no canaries, no nothin'." "Mine was the only cool bird there." "Come on, man." "I can't do it." "I'm really in pain here." "He asked if I could get him canaries." "I'm in pain here." "Hurry up." "I have to get things done." "I don't know where your spoon is, man." "We packed everything up." "It's all in the bags." "I can't eat my yogurt without my spoon." "Come on, will you?" "Are you fuckin' blind or what?" "Take these, then come back for more." "I'll give you a few, but make sure you take 'em." "How do I take them?" "Every eight hours." "At 7:00 a. m., 3:00 p. m., and 11:00 p. m." "That's the best way." "When you run out, come back." "But make sure you take 'em." "I'll give you some cough syrup then too." "I'll take one as soon as I leave." "They're for shortness of breath?" " Yeah, and the cough syrup too." "Be sure you take them at the right times." "Geny went out to take care of business, like she always did." "I don't know if you saw, but at one point they had to carry her." "From down here all the way up there." "It's so sad." "It is." "She went out to take care of business, and so did I." "When I got back in the evening, they told me, "Geny's dead. " I couldn't believe it." "Me neither." "I think she was close with Fragata." "I don't know who she was with." "She just collapsed." "Right at Fragata's feet, I think." "Poor thing." "They called an ambulance, but she didn't want to go." "But she had no choice." "When they called another one later, she did go, but she was dead on arrival." "That's how these things go." "Paulo wouldn't help at all." "Geny had to earn enough for their six fixes every night." "And he just sat there waiting." "He wouldn't even go out and get one lousy fix." "That wasn't right of him." "It was rotten." "He says he tried, but he couldn't make any money." " But you do, don't you?" " Of course." "When you really need it, you manage." " Exactly." "I told him that many times," ""When things get tough, you'll have to do it. "" "Now he goes out sometimes and gets enough for his morning hit." "You see?" "But only because he's selling cotton wool." "Me and Juliao are fed up with all the coming and going at the house." "If that ends, he'll have to get his act together." "Right." "Have you seen Juliao?" "He was doing so well." " He's at it again." " He shot up yesterday." "And today too, I'm sure." "I saw him this morning but then lost track of him." "He passed by a while ago." "He suffered so much." "Cold turkey..." "and he was using big-time." "Just imagine, cold turkey." " I couldn't take it." " Me neither." "I'm so scared of withdrawal." "That's the scariest thing." "Me too." "You want these flowers?" "I have no money." " I'll give them to you cheap." " I have no money." "Listen, keep them anyway." "Put them in a nice vase." " Thank you." "You might want to take them to the cemetery." "They wouldn't allow them." "Plastic flowers only." "I didn't know that." "At the new cemetery?" "That's news to me." " Plastic flowers only." "Thank you." " Don't mention it." "See ya." "Tell her to send me money if you want cigarettes." "I don't have a cent." "I can't." "A carton is too much." "Then tell her to come here." "I don't have a cent." "Yes, tell her to come here." "Okay, bye." "Same to you." "I haven't got a cent." "I can't." "Holy Mother of God..." "Hurry up." "It's almost over." "The sun wasn't covered completely." "You can see it better on TV." "The sun's bigger, isn't it?" "Time to abandon ship, guys." "This flea's been bugging me for a week now." "This isn't a flea... it's an elephant." "Gotcha." "The floor is all tiled." "The only thing it hasn't got is doors." "There are windows upstairs." "We'll close them when we go to sleep, and no one will come in." "The only problem is that the door's missing downstairs, but otherwise..." "The walls are painted nice and proper." "It's not dirty, but we can give it a good cleaning anyway." "I'm not sure I have everything." "That's all we gotta do." "My keys?" "It's a sin, the city tearing this down." "I'm telling you:" "You better start showing some respect or you'll pay for it." "There's still time to mend your ways." "That's what's wrong with Portugal..." "the way people act here." "Everyone thinks they can say whatever they want." "If you insult somebody, you should pay for it." "Who asked you?" " You swear at everyone!" " Yeah... fuck everyone!" "In Cape Verde you'd be locked in your room." " The fuck I would!" " You have a filthy mouth!" "Who made you the fuckin'boss around here anyway?" "This place still belongs to my father." "In this country you don't know what respect is." "A girl has to show respect where respect is due." "Yeah, right." "If not, she has to be punished... severely." " And I don't have respect?" " You?" "Respect?" "You lie in bed all day." "You never work, never get up." "All day and and night in bed with your door closed." "How can you live like that?" "You'll never find your way." "On my island... you'd have to get up at 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning to work in the fields or pick vegetables to sell to have something to live off of." "Sometimes you don't even get time to eat." "You're hungry and thirsty, but you keep working." "You're gonna have to shape up." "You'll never find your way." "Does he think I have to put up with him when he's drunk?" "Who's he think he is?" "He picked the wrong day." "Senhora Gracinda... wanna buy a silver spoon for 150 escudos?" "Zinha..." "Wanna buy a silver spoon for 100 escudos?" "When we were kids, we'd repeat to ourselves the whole way," ""Salt... salt... salt... "" "And when we got there, we couldn't remember." ""Ma'am, my mother said she wants... she wants..." "I forgot!"" "You remember Pitrolino?" "Didn't a man go around selling in your neighborhood?" "He sold paraffin and other stuff." "Right." "He was a greengrocer on wheels." "Pitrolino." "I don't remember very well." "I was just a kid." "Just a kid." "He still comes around today!" "And everybody still calls him Pitrolino." "He still does his rounds." "But now it's wine he sells, not paraffin." " And groceries." " Bleach." "And now he brings the cooking gas." "And he brings Anita her wine." "That was back then." ""Paprika, paprika, paprika... "" ""Ma'am, my mother wants... she wants... "" ""Wants what?" "I forgot. "" ""Go ask her again. " I'd come back." ""My mother wants..." "I forgot again!"" "I was too much." "I was always forgetting things." "That's why I'd run the whole way saying to myself," ""Salt, rice, paprika, salt, rice, paprika. "" "Jesus." "One time at school," "I was playing ball with a friend of mine." "I loved playing ball." "There was this barbed wire on the ground." "I lift the wire to get the ball, and she comes in behind me." "I let the wire drop again, and it tore into her scalp." "As she tried to get away, I heard a ripping sound." "She still has the scars today." "I tell her, "Paula, you'll never forget that. "" ""No, I still have the scars. "" "I was always getting into trouble." "It's like when my godmother down the way was really getting into it with Secundinha." "A real busybody, she steps outside, and this stool comes flying down and bangs her right on the noggin." "She won't forget that either." "Listen... we thought she'd learn her lesson, but no." "You know, we had a good childhood here in this neighborhood." "It's sad to have to leave it." "Makes me sad." "We had a good childhood here." " If I ever come back..." " Let me have a hit." "There were no drugs before." "There were, but..." "It was all hidden, not like now." "Who'd have thought that Geny was dealing?" "Our Geny." "Hey, don't pull on it like that!" "Look what you're doing to it!" "You're burning the whole thing up." " Just one puff." " You just had one." "How many you gonna take?" "I only take small ones." "Yeah, right." "That's how it ends up like that." "You burn up the whole thing." " I don't." " Like fuck you don't!" "The next person burns their fuckin' mouth." "What do you want, Nhurro?" "Give me some bread, Zita." "What?" "Some bread." "There's nothing left, Nhurro." "Thank you, ma'am." "NO ARTIFICIAL FLOWERS ALLOWED" "Listen..." "I brought my backpack, two pairs of trousers, a shirt... and my old sneakers." "That's all." "And I have you." "That's enough for me." "I'm not asleep." "I'm listening." "Sad, isn't it?" "I don't know what I'm gonna do." "This is the life we want." "I've always helped you, and I'll help you now." "I've never denied you anything." "We've known each other since we were small." "That's why I'm telling you, I know this is a girl's room, but..." "It's just that when you come in like that, I could have been undressed." "I know." "If you're here, I suppose you asked permission." "Yeah." "I knocked." "At least I learned that much from my father." "You don't come around more often 'cause you don't want to." "I know." "We never told you not to." "I don't like to be around people who're helping me so much." "They end up saying you're using them." "We've never said that." ""We helped him out a bit, and now he thinks he owns the place. "" "We never said that in all this time." "From here on, I don't know." "Every time I'm here, I feel at home." "That's why I'm asking you to take me in now." "You can come anytime." "If you don't, it's 'cause you don't want to." "And you never went without food." " It's true." "Food or a place to lay my head." "This is the life we want, doing drugs." "No, it's not the life we want." "It's the life we're forced to live." "You think so?" "I do." "It's like destiny, a path you have to keep..." "You were doing so well, and look at you now." "Countless times I saw you go by, and I'd ask, "You at it again?"" ""No, I'm coming from work. "" "But I was right, wasn't I?" "No, lots of time when I passed by... it wasn't to get drugs." "I was coming from work." "They'd drop me off here." "But lots of times I'd come down here..." "To score." "No, sometimes I didn't have a dime." "I'd meet a dealer and say," ""I need 2,000 escudos to take my girl out." "I'm broke." "The boss didn't pay me. "" "But instead he says, "Here, take 5,000."" "And what did you waste it on?" "Smack." "It's the life we want." "That's how I see it." "It's just how it is." "You know what it's like, what happened to me..." "Happened to me, you, and lots of others." "Yes, but you still have your mother..." "Who helps me a lot." "And I work like a dog for it too, don't I?" "But I must admit:" "There are very few mothers like mine." "Those mothers who..." "For me too..." "there's no one like my mother." "You only have one mother." "You can call anybody father." "She never refused me a thing, though she never had anything herself." "The little she had, she always..." " Gave to you." "She didn't give you more on account of your father." "But I tried not to ask her for money, because I knew she needed what little she had herself." "Right." "But I did her wrong too." "That's bound to happen, if you ask me." "But I think she always forgave me." "That's why I left..." "so I wouldn't hurt her more." "Now imagine a mother dealing with four like us." "I was enough to drive my mother crazy." "Now imagine four." "My mother stopped drinking." "You see?" "She's having a hard time with withdrawal." "She hasn't drunk for three months now." "Doesn't that mean anything to you?" "It does." "Look where my sister and brother-in-law are now." "Looks like that's where we're heading too." "I wish we were." "One day they'll reach a certain point and say, "Enough. "" "They won't have enough." "They won't have what they had here." "Even your mother is bound to give up eventually." "What choice does she have?" "But I work hard to help her." "They have to get it into their skulls and start cutting down..." "And then stop." "With two already in there, you and me don't need to join them." "We gotta stop and help each other, like we did when we were small, right?" "I lost my grandmother, and you have no one left to help you, right?" "I'm going out." "I can't take any more of this." " But you'll let me stay?" " Of course." " For a while." " You know I will." "Thanks." " You wanna buy a finch?" " I have no money." " Look how pretty." " No, no money." "Thanks, but I have no money." "Put it right there." "Put away our stuff, and Ma's too." "Vanda, wanna buy my finch?" "Vanda?" "What do you want Vanda for?" "Ma'am, any lettuce or cabbage?" "Lettuce or cabbage?" "VENDA NOVA FUNERAL PARLOR" "You want cabbage?" "Life has shown me nothing but contempt." "Living in ghost houses other people left empty." "I've lived in houses... not even a witch would live in." "But I've been in decent houses too... houses that..." "All the houses I've lived in were illegal." "They were houses abandoned by other people, but if there was a decent person living in them... they didn't tear them down." "That's the way it was... house after house." "I've paid more for the things I didn't do... than for the things I did." "They've started rehousing people?" "Where?" "Over where Carla lives." "In Boavista?" "Oh God." "It's not a bad area." "Not all neighborhoods are like ours." "And where will we end up?" "God only knows." "In the cemetery." "I'm exhausted." "Nhurro's gone." "Nhurro took off." "The girls' room was too much for him." "Where are my pants?" "This room's always a mess." "Is it cold?" "I gotta ask you for a needle." "Mine's blocked up." "I'll lend you a syringe." "It's the needle that's blocked up." "Unblock it." "Where'd I put that syringe?" "Here." "Take off the needle and clean it out with water." "Put some water in it, Fly." "But you have to hurry, 'cause it'll clot." "Don't pour it on the floor." "Pour it out here." " That's where I make my bed." " You sleep there?" "I'm afraid so." " Ma, what time are you going?" " Midnight... can't you see?" "She skips the morning and goes in the afternoon." " What of it?" " Shut the fuck up!" "You're really pathetic." "Are you staying here?" "You're not coming?" "Come where?" "They wouldn't let me in anyway." "Come on... just to get out." "And who's gonna look after the boy?" "Then stay here." "I mean, if he were asleep..." "Miranda, if you want to go, go." "You can stay in the car." "All that way just to get out of the house?" "Bye-bye, Lena." ""Bye-bye." "See you. "" ""I'm going to the cafe with my daddy. "" ""Let's go get a bite to eat. "" ""Let's go eat. "" "Tell Lena bye-bye." "It's fake." "Just one puff." "One?" "I only took one myself!" "Stop shouting!" "Shit!" "You're wasting it." "Me?" "I swear on Granny's soul." "Where'd it go?" "Here it is." "Give it to me." "I'm laughing, but it's only 'cause of withdrawal." "You never laugh?" "No?" "Then you're the only one." "You're special." "Not everybody has to laugh." "Some people cry, but that's when they're out of smack." "When they have some, they laugh." "Who wouldn't?" "You've done a lot of crying yourself." "You bet I have." "In the hospital all I did was cry." "Fuck that!" "Been there, done that." "And I've got the basket to prove it." "What basket?" "You're so stupid." "What basket?" "Your basket." "My basket?" "Watch what you're doing there." "What basket?" "The basket." "You really are thick." " You're the thick one." "You never heard," ""Been there, done that, and I've got the basket to prove it"?" "Know what movie that's from?" "The one where the woman pulls out a gun exactly this size from between her tits." "Police Academy." "It was on TV two weeks ago." " Take one puff and let me finish it." " Why just one?" "Because I only took one, that's why." " Come on!" " Come on yourself." "Give it here." "You going out on your rounds?" "You're gonna hurt yourself with that." "You're gonna hurt yourself."