"(SPEAKS MAORI)" "My name is Boy, and welcome to my interesting world." "My favourite person is Michael Jackson." "He is the best singer and dancer in the world." "Last month he put out a record called 'Thriller'." "It sold a gazillion copies and now he lives in a castle with a snake and a monkey." "He is so famous that you can even see him in the stars." "I live in a white house with my nanny and my cousins " "Hucks, Kiko, Miria, Chay and Kelly." "I have a pet goat called Leaf." "I also have a six-year-old brother called Rocky." "(PEOPLE JEER) BOY:" "Loser!" "He thinks he's got powers." "(BANG!" ") (PEOPLE SCREAM)" "He doesn't." "Bye-bye." "Yesterday my nan went away to a funeral." "While she's gone I'm in charge of the house." "(engine REVS)" "I go to Raukokore School." "I have many favourite subjects, including art... (LAUGHS)" "..social study... ..and Michael Jackson." "My friends are Dallas and her sister Dynasty." "They also have a sister called Falcon Crest." "Dynasty is the only girl around here with a job." "She does after-school gardening work for her dad." "Aunty Gracey is my mum's sister." "She has lots of jobs." "(GRUNTS)" "She's the tennis coach, the mailman, the school bus driver and she runs the local shop." "Aunty, can I have a free iceblock, please?" "(WHlNES)" "My real name is Alamein." "I'm named after my dad and he's named after some place where the Maori battalion fought during World War ll." "Dad's brothers and sisters are Faenza, Tunisia, Libya and Michael Jackson." "My dad's not here right now." "He's a busy man." "He's a master carver, deep-sea treasure diver, the captain of the rugby team and he holds the record for punching out the most people with one hand." "When he comes home he's taking me to see Michael Jackson live." "The end." "Thank you, Boy." "Tane, your turn." "Get up there." "TANE:" "My name is Tane..." "Young man, you're a liar." "Your dad's not overseas." "He's in jail for robbery." "Shut up, Kingi." "You don't know." "Yes, he's in the same cell block as my dad." "Not anymore." "He escaped." "How?" "He dug a hole underneath the fence." "With what?" "A spoon." "(siren wails)" "What about the guards?" "Aarggh!" "BOY:" "He wasted them." "BOY:" "With the spoon." "Aarggh!" "(GROANS)" "Bullshit." "Shut up, Kingi, you don't know." "(TANE SPEAKS lNDlSTlNCTLY)" "(whispers) Look at me." "Look at me." "Look at me." "Look at me." "Look at me." "Look at me." "Look at me." "Look at me." "Go and talk to her, bro." "A man needs to tell a woman how he feels." "I don't want to talk to her." "Tane would." "He'd probably French kiss her too." "You French kiss all the girls, eh, bro?" "Pretty much." "Not all the girls." "Well, here's my trick." "I tell the girls that I'm afraid of undies and when they want me to go away, they show me their undies." "(LAUGHS)" "Act cool." "Act cool." "Here she comes." "(whispers) Go do something." "Hey, Chardonnay, want to see some Michael Jackson dance moves?" "He did those moves at the Grammys." "Al, the boy's afraid of undies." "(giggles)" "Nits, nits, nits, nits, nits." "Who here has had nits?" "(ALL SPEAK indistinctly) Oi, shut up." "Now, who knows what disease this sheep has got?" "aids." "Not aids, you dork." "(ALL LAUGH)" "Yes, because it looks like Murray and he's got aids." "Don't be stupid." "Kids can't get aids - only gays." "He's a gay." "He goes out with Boy." "Shut up, Kingi." "Ohh!" "What are you gonna do?" "Get your brother on me or something?" "That picture looks like Kingi's undies when he shat his pants on sports day, remember?" "Fuck up, Boy." "You fuck up." "You fuck up." "You fuck up." "Fuck up." "Hey!" "Both of you fuck up or I'll send you to the principal!" "Now, who's heard of the plague?" "You." "Your mum had it." "Fuck you!" "Hey, you bloody kids, cut it out!" "WOMAN:" "Simon says touch your nose." "TEACHER:" "Move your bloody arse." "Now get all your crayons." "(SPEAKS MAORl)" "School's finished!" "Oi." "You alright, Boy?" "You want to talk about it?" "He made fun of my mum." "He's a dickhead." "It's just words, Boy." "People call me a dumb honky all the time." "I don't go around punching them out." "Why not?" "Because they're usually children." "That was a good speech you did." "Looks like we might have an orator on our hands, eh?" "What's that?" "(SPEAKS MAORl)" "Oh, yeah, my dad was good at that." "Yeah, I went to school with him." "Yeah, he was a good student." "Like you, full of potential." "Finish to the end here and go home, eh?" "Hey, Mr Langston, what does that word mean - 'potential'?" "Ah, it's 3:30, mate" " I'm off duty." "You have a good holiday, eh." "Touch my brother again and I'll kick both your nuts off." "Then you'll have none." "OK?" "OK?" "OK." "Oh, man." "This one has all got magic powers, this fella can jump real high, this fella can run real fast, this fella can blow things up and this fella can turn invisible." "Rocky, you have to come home." "But I'm drawing." "Hurry up, fool." "I got better things to do than this." "Finish it off later." "Bloody hell, you're a nuisance." "Making me walk all the way down here." "Bye, Mum." "I want you to stop hanging around down there." "It's creepy." "And stop being so weird." "Hurry up, egg." "Bloody egg." "What are you?" "An egg." "Rotten egg." "Scrambled egg." "Boiled egg." "Poached egg." "Bloody hell." "(SPEAKS MAORl)" "Crayfish again." "(MAN SPEAKS lNDlSTlNCTLY ON TV)" "So if you fellas live in the middle, may as well stay home because no bloody good anywhere else." "(ALL LAUGH)" "What do you want to do, eh, Leaf?" "We might as well just stay here, eh?" "Oh, man, had a massive day at school today." "There was a big-ass rumble at school." "Most of the children were involved." "I wasn't, because I'm a good boy." "I don't like fighting, eh." "Far, lots of things happened, but what else?" "Oh, yeah." "I seen my girlfriend, Chardonnay." "She invited me back to her house and we had McDonald's to eat." "It was yum." "Why do you like to eat other people's rubbish, eh, Leaf?" "(DOGS BARK AND THUNDER RUMBLES)" "Storm's coming." "Who are you?" "Boy." "What boy?" "Alamein." "Alamein." "Yeah." "Alright, I'm your dad." "Oh!" "Hey, Dad." "Hey." "Welcome back." "Good to see you." "Good to see you." "How's it been going?" "Good." "How's it been going with you?" "(CHORTLES) Good." "Now, where's Mum?" "My mum, you know, your nanny?" "Oh, she's not here at the moment." "She's at a tangi down Wellington." "Someone passed away." "When's she getting back?" "Sometime next week." "Rocky, come over here." "Meet Dad." "Dad, this is Rocky." "Rocky, this is Dad." "Yeah, how are you, Rocky?" "Good to see you, man." "Too much." "Say hello, egg." "Hello, egg." "(PASSENGERS LAUGH)" "That's Kelly." "Yeah, niece, I'm your uncle - Alamein." "Oh, great." "Another one." "Well, these are my mates Juju and Chuppa." "JUJU:" "How are you doing?" "ALAMElN:" "They're basically your uncles." "So, you guys want a cup of tea?" "Oh, yeah." "Yeah, a cup of tea sounds good." "(ALL SLURP)" "So, you fellas want to come inside?" "Yeah." "Yeah." "Yeah." "Yeah, let's do that." "Seen 'E.T.' yet, the movie?" "No." "What's it about?" "Spaceman." "Oh, space kid, really." "He gets trapped on Earth and him and this kid fly around everywhere on a bicycle." "I seen it four times." "(sighs) Nice house, bro." "It's a shithole." "Oh, yeah." "Oh, I don't know, bro." "These old houses are made of native timber - expensive stuff." "Not many people know that, eh?" "I mean, these door handles are made of copper." "Yeah, yeah." "Yeah, if I was a thief, the first thing I'd do is I'd take all the copper and I'd melt it down in a furnace or a fire and then sell it to a copper dealer, eh." "Alright then, I guess it's time for presents." "Go on, boys, go get them presents." "What presents?" "The stuff from the car." "Oh, yeah." "I might go give them a hand." "Hey, real milk!" "A new TV!" "Eh?" "Oh, thank you." "Here, you can have the rest." "Oh, thanks, Dad." "Now, don't go burning your eyes out or anything." "Share them with him too." "You know this used to be my room?" "Yeah." "Oh, well, you can still use it." "I'll sleep in the garage with my mates." "Not a problem." "Wow, look at that mop of hair you've got." "I should cut your hair one day." "Make you look like this fella." "I've seen 'Thriller' 1 0 times." "I did that." "Don't get into the Nazi stuff." "Night." "Night, Dad." "(DOOR CLOSES)" "How long is he here for?" "Don't know." "But we're leaving with him when he goes." "Why?" "Because that's the way families work, egg." "Is he the same as before?" "Yeah, better." "Do you think he remembers me?" "Yeah, of course, man." "From when I was being born?" "Yep." "I don't remember it." "No, of course you don't." "You were just a little baby and you still are." "What was she like?" "Not this again." "Well, she was pretty." "She was a good singer." "And her and Dad were always laughing." "How did they meet?" "At the beach." "She was swimming and Dad saved her from drowning." "And then he did a carving of her." "And then they had babies - us." "And he can do heaps of cool stuff." "He can dance as good as Michael Jackson." "And once, when he was a soldier, all these commies pinned him down to the ground, so he leapt out of his foxhole and just did this meanest haka and all them commies got scared and ran away." "And was he a soldier?" "Hell, yeah!" "He's a war hero." "He's even got a green beret." "What's that?" "A type of hat." "Shh." "Look." "Look." "There's that mental fella." "Hey, weirdo!" "Hey!" "Come on, Rocky, get him." "Aarggh!" "Get out of here, you weirdo." "Did you get him, Rocky?" "No." "Typical, egg." "Not too hard." "What's the Crazy Horses?" "It's my gang." "I'm the president and founding member." "Yeah." "Crazy Horses. (NElGHS)" "That's our sign." "It would've been that, but it was taken." "We're renegades." "What's those?" "Someone who lives outside the law, but they're still cool." "Like the A-Team or the Hulk." "Gee, even these samurais - they're the meanest renegades." "Hey, whose is this mean carving?" "Oh, mine." "Yeah." "Looks just like E.T." "It's based on one of yours, but it ain't finished yet." "Yeah, I know, 'cause you ain't done the eyes." "That's the last thing you do - them eyes." "Do you still carve?" "Nup." "I ain't got time for that." "(sighs) I'm a busy man." "Mmm." "(CALLS) Oh, Rocky!" "Hey, where you skating off to?" "What's that supposed to mean?" "What's wrong with him?" "You want to go for a ride in my car?" "Yeah." "Cool." "Let's go." "Far!" "(GASPS)" "(whistles)" "Phwoar!" "Mean car." "Hey, Uncle." "Who's this, then?" "Mouldy Smith." "(sighs)" "Well, see you at home, then, eh?" "What?" "Are you going?" "Can I come?" "Oh, I'm busy." "I've got a few things to take care of." "You hang out here with your mates, man." "Dukes of Hazard." "(GRUNTS with exertion)" "(HORN BEEPS)" "(girls giggle)" "Hmph!" "So he finally came home, eh?" "How long's he here for?" "Don't know." "Not long." "That'd be right." "Has he been to see your mum yet?" "Nah, not yet." "Fucking typical!" "Hey, Aunty, can I have an iceblock, please?" "No!" "Oh, it's not fair." "Get a job, man." "Oh, there's none left." "You got them all!" "Boy, can I have a go with one?" "Can't." "Saving them for a special occasion." "Hey, was that your dad?" "Yep." "Oh, he's got a premo car." "How long's he staying for?" "Not long." "But we're gonna be moving pretty soon." "Where to?" "Don't know." "Probably just cruise around in his mean-ass car." "Hey, you guys, I just did a massive shit in there." "You should go and check it out." "Oh, yeah." "I'll check that out!" "Don't touch, Falcon." "I want the lollies." "They're lollies for adults, not for children, Falcon." "Pest!" "Wow!" "What a mean one, Dally." "Alright, we're finished." "Let's go." "Tip!" "Hey, weirdo, do you live here?" "Shh!" "(whispers) Why do we have to whisper?" "Because it's dangerous on the river." "Sorry." "I live here with my mum." "My mum's dead." "I killed her." "Do you have any friends?" "Do you have a brother?" "No." "I've got a brother." "He's cool." "He's hanging out with our dad." "What's he like?" "Loud." "(CHUCKLES)" "(GRUNTS with exertion)" "Sorry." "I think I did that." "Hey?" "I think I made you fall over." "Sorry." "I have to watch out for my powers." "They're too dangerous." "My brother says that's how my mum died." "'Cause of my powers were too strong when I was getting born." "You gotta use them to do good, eh?" "Just like in the comic books." "What are we looking for?" "Anything." "Quick!" "Here they come." "Here come the cops!" "Quick!" "Quick!" "Here!" "Here!" "Alright." "Where am I?" "Here." "Here." "Dig. (GRUNTS)" "Forget it, man." "Something here." "It's right here." "That's where it is." "Not there." "So, I mean..." "I would've..." "I would've run further than that." "(sighs) I thought you knew, man." "I do." "It's a certain number of steps from the post." "I just can't remember the exact number of steps... (sighs) ..or the post." "If we're digging here, why didn't you draw a map?" "I was in a hurry." "Cops were right behind me." "I don't have time to start drawing maps." "Let's just get a tractor and dig it up, man." "Yeah, if I want to dig holes all day, I would've stayed in jail." "You know what" " I'm fucking sick of this shit from you pricks." "I'm making history here." "They're gonna write about me." "You can say, "l was part of that."" "Want to be part of it or not?" "If not, piss off." "Yeah, I want to be part of it." "Hey, Dad." "Hey, Uncle!" "Wave." "Hey." "What are youse looking for?" "Something." "What?" "Worms?" "Treasure." "We're looking for a package, OK?" "It's about this big." "Yep." "Covered in plastic." "When you find it... (LAUGHS)" "Hey, Dad." "Do you know what 'potential' means?" "What?" "Mr Langston says it." "Oi!" "Cut it out, you pricks!" "Quit pissing around." "Dad, what are you gonna do with the money?" "I don't know." "What do you reckon?" "You should buy a big-ass house." "Mmm." "Maybe I should." "Maybe I should buy me a dolphin too, ride around on him all day." "You can have one too." "And Rocky." "Yeah, all three of us on dolphins... ..that go anywhere... ..do what we want... ..be anyone." "Dad... ..look at this." "Oi!" "Where'd you get this?" "Give it here." "Oh." "Where'd you get it?" "Oh, I found it." "Where?" "On the side of the road." "Hey, you make sure you find any more of this, you bring it straight to me, eh?" "Straight to me." "OK?" "girl: (CALLS) Boy!" "Quick!" "Nan's on the phone!" "Keep digging!" "Where's he going?" "It's not really a gang." "There's only three of them." "Hey!" "Mum, it's me" " Alamein." "I'm good." "I'm home." "Well, how are you?" "Yeah, I got you a present." "It's a type of oven." "Only rich people have them." "Uh, when you getting home?" "There's all these kids here." "Yeah, we're getting on great." "Hey, um..." "Uh, do you think I could borrow some money?" "I'm just a bit broke at the moment." "Oh, it's not fair, man." "These kids get more than we ever got." "Oh, I know it's not a competition." "Never said it was." "Eh?" "No, you grow up!" "(LAUGHS)" "I will spend more time with those boys." "Quality time." "Eh, look at the skin under here." "Black as night." "You must be part African." "Shit." "Everyone will think Michael Jackson moved to town." "(BEEPS HORN)" "(GRUNTS)" "Aarggh!" "You!" "Yeah, you." "You stay there." "Is your name Holden?" "Is it?" "Yeah?" "Picking on my son, are you?" "Want me to pick on you?" "Man, I mean, E.T. is one of the ugliest buggers I've ever seen - big googly eyes, long neck." "But you know what - on his home planet, he probably looks normal." "Hey, what's that kid doing out here?" "Rocky... ..what are you up to?" "Does he actually know how to speak?" "Rocky, what are you doing, egg?" "Playing." "Well, Rocky, come on, man." "We're going to go to the beach." "Come with us." "(sighs)" "Hurry up, you egg!" "Come on." "Cool." "This is good, what we're doing." "Quality time." "Ah, it's nice here." "I like the waves." "They're romantic." "Did you and Mum meet here?" "Nah." "We met at school when we were kids." "Even then, I knew she was the one." "Why?" "You got a girlfriend?" "Oh, there's this girl that really likes me a lot." "But I don't know if I wanna, you know, get involved." "Mmm." "Mmm." "Well, don't get her pregnant." "That's all." "Hey?" "It's the number one rule." "Hey, you can show her your dick, feel her tit." "I'd be happy if you just got a hickey." "But don't have a kid, 'cause I don't want to be a koro just yet." "A hickey!" "Well, she ain't gonna touch you looking like that, man." "You want to dress up a little, like me." "Can I be on the Crazy Horses one day?" "(sighs)" "Oh, you're a bit young, man." "It's more of an adult's game and we don't muck around with toys and games." "Maybe when you're older." "Come on." "Gear up." "We're going over the top." "(YELLS) Let's get 'em, man!" "Charge!" "Charge!" "(lMlTATES gunfire) Move, move, move, move, move!" "Ohh!" "(lMlTATES gunfire)" "It's buried treasure." "What?" "Buried treasure, man." "Like a pirate's treasure." "Like gold?" "Yeah, but better - money." "How much?" "About a million dollars." "What happens if we find it?" "Then we're out of here!" "Buy a house in the city, buy a big car, buy some dolphins." "Probably dress up in tuxedos all the time too." "I don't wanna go to the city." "I bet ya there's even a swimming pool." "I can swim in the sea." "Go on, then." "Meanwhile, me and Dad will be relaxing in our swimming pool, riding dolphins and drinking cocktails." "And you'd better not tell anyone or I'll knock your bloody block off." "(lMlTATES gunfire)" "This party's dead." "It's not a party, egg." "It's a get-together." "There's a difference." "Rightio." "If it was a party, you'd know about it." "Whatever." "Rocky..." "Oh, see ya." "Hey, you having a good time?" "Yeah." "Yeah?" "Yeah, your haircut seems to be a bit of a hit." "Hey, you want a little sip of beer?" "Yeah." "Little one." "Good?" "Yep." "1 1, eh?" "That's pretty young for your first sip." "Oh, if you find any more of that stuff, bring it to me, eh?" "OK." "And can you stop calling me "Dad"?" "It sounds weird." "Besides, we're more like bros, you and me." "Then what shall I call you?" "I don't know." "What do you reckon?" "Alamein?" "Maybe." "What about 'Shogun'?" "I like that." "What's Shogun?" "Samurai master." "Like a commander." "He rules the samurais." "Like ariki." "Yeah, but he's a samurai." "Samurais are better." "BOTH:" "Shogun." "Yeah." "Oh, that sounds good!" "So what should we call me?" "I don't know. 'Little shogun'?" "That'd be funny." "Hey, Boy." "Oh, hi, Al." "ALAMElN:" "Hey, boys!" "Come in." "Come in." "Here, have a seat." "Go on." "Sit down." "Thank you, Uncle." "Nah, nah, nah." "Call me Shogun." "(PEOPLE SPEAK indistinctly)" "This is a party!" "Oi, why aren't youse out there making friends?" "We don't know no-one, man." "(MOCKlNGLY) "Don't know no-one, man."" "Hey, learn how to speak!" "(LAUGHS) (LAUGHS)" "Boy, you didn't make dinner." "We're hungry!" "Do I look like your bloody mother?" "Make your own." "Piss off, will ya?" "I'm sick of you kids hassling me." "Chill out, man." "Chill out, man." "It's a party." "Eh?" "Chill out." "Oh, too slow, you old man." "Hey!" "Come over here." "Here's a real man, right here." "This is a real man." "Not like you two eggs." "Hey, my son." "My best friend." "My main man." "And my other main man." "Who's this?" "Three main men." "Who's that?" "The three main men." "Who's that?" "The two egg men." "Look at you, man." "Oh, man." "I wish he was my dad." "I'm gonna be a Crazy Horse too." "ALAMElN:" "Shogun." "What's my name?" "Shogun." "I'm a shogun!" "I'm a shogun!" "(melodic music)" "(GROANS)" "Piss off, man." "Hello?" "Oh, hi, Chardonnay." "It's Boy speaking." "I was just wondering if you would like to come for a ride in my dad's cool car." "(lMlTATES engine)" "Whoo!" "Fetch!" "(lMlTATES TYRES squealing)" "I'm bored." "Hey." "Well... ..you can see my dick, but I ain't allowed to get you pregnant." "You fucking arsehole." "Look, I got a hickey." "Man!" "Yeah." "JUJU:" "Dig!" "Dig!" "CHUPPA:" "That's the way, bro!" "Good boy." "That's it." "That's the one." "Find my shit so I can get the hell out of here." "Good slave, Boy!" "Not a fucking slave." "Sorry, bro." "I wasn't really expecting a hickey." "Well, what?" "It just came." "It's on my neck - happened." "So you go to punch me and then I block it?" "Yep." "Aarggh!" "Fuck!" "You alright, mate?" "Not now!" "Is that it?" "(MOUTHS)" "(GASPS) Stop moving." "Just hold still, bro." "It's just hot." "Far." "Mean-as tatts." "Yep." "And now it's your turn." "What?" "(LAUGHS)" "Don't worry, man, you'll get the kids' version." "(MEN LAUGH)" "(JAUNTY POP music PLAYS) (lMlTATES whine OF F1 engine)" "(conversational CHATTER)" "(KNOCK AT window) Knowwhy I pulled you over, miss?" "(sighs)" "Probably can't even drive, anyway." "As if you can, egg." "Far, what happened to your head?" "It's a haircut." "It's the latest style." "It's late alright." "Alright, come on in, then." "Phew!" "This car smells like marijuana." "You shouldn't smoke it." "You'll end up like all the rest of them dopeheads around here " "laughing at nothing and crying at everything." "Where you been, anyway?" "Ain't seen you in ages." "Hanging with the old man." "So, who are you here with?" "My mum." "She's playing the pokies." "She win anything?" "Nuh." "But she reckons it's better to risk your money on something big, be real poor, instead of sitting around being a bit poor." "Far, you've been missing out on all the fun." "We pushed Murray off the wharf yesterday." "Ain't got time for that kids' stuff." "I'm working." "Trying to get out of this dump." "When you guys leaving?" "Don't know." "When my dad's free, I guess." "But he's a busy man." "They always are." "(conversational CHATTER)" "Oh, well, looks like we lost." "How do you know?" "'Cause we're going home." "See ya...dopehead." "Weirdo, do you feel sleepy yet?" "No." "(sighs) My powers must be stink." "Maybe power don't work on everyone." "Well, who, then?" "Please, Mum, I just need a little bit of money till I find my money." "I can't wait for you." "I've got places to be." "And don't expect me to take them kids." "They're too young to be Crazy Horses." "My gang." "Me and my two mates." "But that's not the point." "We're renegades." "Strictly no kids allowed." "Well, yeah, well, you obviously know nothing about gangs, so this conversation's over, OK?" "I won't be here when you get home." "Fuckin' hell!" "(PHONE dings)" "(GRUNTS)" "(EXHALES)" "(engine REVS) Shogun!" "Shogun!" "Take me with you!" "Shogun!" "Mate, where'd he go?" "Is he coming back?" "(sighs) I don't wanna live here." "(GRUNTS SOFTLY)" "Can I have a go?" "Nope." "You need muscle to do this." "And anyway, this is a man's work." "You're not a man." "Technically, I am." "And you're not." "Go on, piss off." "(EXHALES)" "(GRUNTS)" "(GROANS)" "(GRUNTS)" "820. 840. 860. 880." "Bloody hell, Leaf!" "We're rich!" "We're bloomin' rich." "You've got some potential too." "(GATE CREAKS)" "(whispers) We're rich." "(LOUDLY) Whoo!" "We're rich!" ""Potential." "Not now ma...ni...fest," ""or showing signs of ex...is...tence or activity."" "What the hell?" "Who the hell are you supposed to be?" "I'll take these." "(HUMS)" "Now, how many iceblocks can I get for $5, eh?" "$5 in the real world or Monopoly Land?" "Thanks, Boy." "Don't call me that anymore." "What, "Boy"?" "Yeah." "I don't like it." "Well, what about Fonzie?" "(SCOFFS) Just call me Little Shogun." "Thanks, Little Shogun." "Thanks, Little Shogun." "Thanks, Little Shogun." "Thanks, Little Fonzie." "No, you look like Michael Jackson in that jacket." "Yeah, bro." "Scored it from the old man." "There's Holden and Chardonnay." "They're going out now." "They've been French kissing and everything." "Yeah, they've been pashing at the beach, on a horse, at the back of the shop." "I heard they were pashing at the dump too." "So?" "Pashing's for kids." "Anyway, I'm not here for long." "I'm gonna be moving soon." "Hey, Boy." "Well, well, well, look at this cheeky fella." "Far, you got your patch already." "Tsk, of course, of course." "Shogun says I have to drink a gumboot full of beer before I can get one." "He doesn't want you in our gang no more." "You pissed him off." "What did I do?" "I don't know, but don't come back to the clubhouse or he'll kill you." "(sarcastically) How's Char-don-nay?" "She's cool." "I know she is, 'cause I already rooted her." "What?" "Bull." "Straight up." "In my dad's car." "Far, she was good!" "You're lying." "I'm gonna ask her, then?" "Go on, then." "She's a liar, anyway." "And if I see her round my pad again," "I'm gonna make you drink a gumboot full of knuckles and sandwiches, boy." "(engine REVS) Oh, shit." "(BRAKES SQUEAK)" "Boy!" "It's Big Shogun." "Shogun, you came back." "Look, look what I found." "Take it off!" "(GROANS)" "Take it off." "Take...it...off!" "Who said you could steal my jacket?" "Nobody." "That's right - nobody." "Now, where'd you get that iceblock, hey?" "Where'd you get the money for that iceblock?" "Answer me." "Where did you get that iceblock from?" "GRACEY:" "Alamein!" "What the hell is your problem, bro?" "What's wrong with you?" "I'm teaching him a lesson." "What?" "He's fine." "You're the one who needs to sort it out, bro!" "He needs to learn about not stealing!" "You are such a frickin' egg." "Oh, you are." "You're a major egg." "What the hell did she see in you, eh?" "Ah, shut your face." "Still a bloody nuisance!" "I know you are, said you are." "What am I?" "(REVS engine)" "Out of my way, you!" "Are you right, Boy?" "Don't worry about it, bro." "Want my iceblock?" "(white noise)" "(EXHALES)" "(THUMP!" ")" "(KNOCKS ON window)" "(TAPS ON window)" "(EXHALES)" "Sorry about today, B." "I'm under a lot of stress at the moment." "Got a lot going on, you know?" "People trying to bring me down and shit." "The government, mainly, and others." "And I'm getting frustrated, you know, I can't find my shit." "I'm sorry I am like I am sometimes." "I get angry." "A bit like the Hulk." "He gets angry." "He's usually helping people, but sometimes he loses control, but he's not a bad guy." "Mainly he's a good guy." "Think you can handle having The Incredible Hulk for a dad?" "Yep." "I love you." "See ya." "All good, bro?" "Yeah, bro." "Good." "(GROANS) Far." "(PAPER RUSTLES)" "(GASPS) LEAF!" "(electric buzzing) Eh?" "Where are the doorknobs?" "(BUZZES LOUDLY)" "Al, stop cooking the doorknobs." "Shush." "(BANG!" ")" "(GASPS) Ooh, I'm telling." "What's going on in here?" "What's that smell?" "Doorknobs." "Bacon." "Bacon?" "Even though he's hideous as, he's still got some cool powers." "He's got the light in his stomach." "I don't really know what it's for, but when he's happy, shit, it gets bright as!" "And the best thing about him is his finger." "And it can heal all wounds, be it a gash or cut on your neck, heartache." "Hey, Shogun." "Well, he'll fix that up, no problem." "Find anything yet?" "Oh, yeah, yeah, we're just digging for fun now, eh, Rocky?" "(LAUGHS)" "Hey, um, Shogun?" "Yeah?" "What if it's gone?" "Hmm?" "The, um, treasure." "What if someone's taken it?" "Who?" "WHO?" "Who?" "Man, I'll fuckin' kill them." "I don't know." "Where's my money?" "!" "(MUTTERS) Fuck." "It's not fair, man." "It's not fair!" "It's OK, Shogun." "We can find it." "We just need some time." "No more time, mate." "(MOUTHS lNAUDlBLY)" "(EXHALES)" "Come on, boys, come on." "Come on, man, fuckin' hurry up." "Go, man!" "They're coming behind you." "(SHRlLLY) Come on!" "Boy!" "Fuckin' move your black arse!" "(LOUD cheering)" "Horses!" "(ALL imitate HORSES)" "Come on, boys, let's bag these up." "How many bags we gonna use?" "As many as it takes, mate." "Whole lot." "(engine REVS)" "Give us a go." "Come on, then." "(MEN CHATTER)" "Oh, what are you doing here?" "I'm allowed." "He's my dad too." "So?" "You should have stayed at home." "But I wanna get to know them." "Why?" "Because he's here." "I'm like him." "I'm like him more than you." "Me and him have the most potential." "What's that?" "If you don't know it, you ain't got it." "That's what makes me cool and you an egg." "How did you get it?" "You get it when you're born." "It's too late for you." "Sorry." "Yeah." "Ka-ching!" "(GASPS)" "(EXHALES)" "(DOOR CREAKS AND SLAMS)" "(engine REVS)" "MAN:" "Just fuck him up, bro." "MAN 2:" "Yeah, I wanna fuck him up." "There's the fuckin' pricks, there." "(conversational CHATTER) Did you miss me, cousin?" "ALAMElN:" "What are you looking at?" "MAN:" "You ripped me off." "Don't know what you're talking about, man." "You know what you did." "I want my fuckin' weed." "Hit him." "(melodic music)" "Have a beer, man." "I don't want your fucking beer, man." "That was cool." "Hey, I mean, that's what it's all about, eh, boys?" "What's what all about?" "We got our arses kicked." "What fight were you in, man?" "We landed some good hits." "Like when you smashed his boot with your nose?" "Oh, yeah, focus on the negative, then." "Eh, Boy, you saw, it was a good fight, eh?" "Go on, tell them, who won that fight, Boy?" "I don't know." "What do you mean you don't know?" "What do you know?" "Nothing." "We'll get more members." "Hundreds." "We'll come back, smash them all." "More members?" "The three of us couldn't smash anyone." "This gang's all shit." "Yeah?" "You're out of the gang." "I don't want you in the gang." "Then there'd only be you." "That's not really a gang, bro." "That's all I need - me." "I am the Crazy Horses." "I'm the Shogun." "I'm all alone on this planet." "Shit, man, I'm E.T." "Keep your eyes on the road." "You keep your eyes on me, alright?" "Everybody blaming me for some shit that..." "Look out!" "What the fuck was that?" "Fuck, bro." "It was a dog, wasn't it?" "You nearly fucking killed us." "What was that?" "I don't know." "I think it was a dog." "It wasn't a dog." "Boy, you stop right there and get back in this car." "It's just a stupid dog, man." "Oh, come on, someone's just let a dog out and it got on the road and nearly killed us." "It was your dangerous driving, man." "You shut up." "Now, come on, man, get back in the car, eh?" "Shit, we got to go." "We got to pack, man." "We're leaving tomorrow." "Yeah, we're going to the city." "You're first in when we get there too." "I'm taking you to see Michael Jackson..." "live." "Come on, man." "I knew, it was just a stupid dog." "It's OK, Leaf." "It's OK." "It'll be alright, Leaf." "Are we going to the city now?" "Oi... ..what do you both think you're doing?" "We're doing nothing." "Eh?" "Taking my fucking stash?" "We're just cleaning up." "Eh?" "You stealing from me?" "Oh, you know, it was Chup, man." "Shut up!" "It wasn't me, man." "I said it was Chup." "ALAMElN:" "After all I did for you!" "Hey?" "It was Chup." "Oh!" "Piss me off, bro!" "Come on, get inside." "Hurry." "Fuck you, Alamein, and your Crazy Horses gang!" "Stop!" "(GRUNTS) Fucking..." "Fucking bastards!" "Fucking thieves!" "(GROWLS)" "(GROWLS)" "(PANTS)" "(CALLS) Boy!" "Boy!" "You've got to come home." "Sorry for what I did to Mum." "(lNHALES DEEPLY)" "Don't touch him." "Where were you, man?" "I needed you today." "I needed you." "That's your treasure." "My goat ate it." "What the fuck..." "You little shit." "Aarggh!" "Ow!" "Oi." "Come on, stop it." "I don't remember you!" "You weren't there." "You weren't there when he was born." "You weren't there when she died!" "Calm down, man, I mean it." "Where were you?" "That's enough." "Stop it!" "Where were you?" "!" "Stop it!" "That's enough, man, OK?" "OK?" "I thought I was like you...but I'm not." "I don't have any potential." "(HORN TOOTS)" "Nan!" "Nanny!" "(LAUGHS)" "(girl SPEAKS lNDlSTlNCTLY)" "Did he really go to Japan?" "Yeah, he's training to be a samurai." "They don't just let anyone in either." "You got to be one of them true professionals." "(GREETS in maori) Boy." "Hey, Rocky." "(GREETS in maori)" "(GREETS in maori) Murray." "(GREETS in maori)" "Tane." "(GREETS in maori)" "So, what you guys been up to?" "Just out muddy." "We're self-employed now." "What's your job?" "Chucking mud at those cows." "(LAUGHS)" "(PEOPLE SPEAK indistinctly)" "(lighter SPARKS)" "How was Japan?" "(WOMAN sings in maori)"