"Do you know the herd theory?" "No, what's that?" "Atheory." "But about what?" "(ALLTHE WOMEN) lt says we all belong to a herd." "Like animals." "Thousands of years ago we lived in groups of 10 or 15 people." "That group is the origin of everything." "The herd you came from and are still looking for." "Who told you that?" "But today, those 15 people from back then are a million and you're more linked to them than to anyone." "But you have to find them." "How?" "Trial and error." "We're doing something crazy." "Who'd drag you into doing that?" "Only someone with a lot of power over you." "Someone from your herd." "You know what that makes us?" "Animals." "Look." "We're here, all right?" "This is the A5." "They'll take a smaller road to avoid check points." "From here to here, it's about 125 miles, and then... they have to get to Portugal." "It's another 60 miles to the border." "The Portuguese guy will wait there." "ln Badajoz?" "No." "In Villanueva del Fresno." "Here." "They just cross over." "It's as easy as that." "And we go on Saturday." "Right, the day after tomorrow." "By then, the Portuguese will have shifted the bulls." "The bullocks." "The bullocks." "And he'll pay us." "OK." "No, Nacho, it's not OK." "You have to give them 2,000." "If you don't, they won't do anything." "And then what do we do?" "What do you do?" "The truck guys?" "They're coming." "And you have to give them the money." "You've got it?" "Fuck." "It's at home." "Well, get it." "We need it now!" "l know, the problem is... I don't want my wife to suspect anything." "Say you forgot something and you have to go out." "It's only 2,000." "Those bulls are..." "Bullocks." "The bullocks are worth 50 times that." "When we get paid, you'll see." "Are you sure about all this?" "Me?" "I couldn't be surer." "You're the one has to be sure." "Me?" "I couldn't be surer." "I'm not a bad person." "Laura..." "Why are you up?" "I'm covered in mud." "There's mud in the stables, in the corrals, on the road." "I was up to my balls in mud." "What?" "What's wrong?" "Nothing, why?" "That look says..." "What?" "That nothing's wrong, but everything is." "We inseminated 93 cows tonight, one after the other." "You can't imagine what it's like at -10?" ", at night, the cow starts moving because of the cold, and kicking..." "My back's screwed up." "I don't know why I keep doing this." "93 cows." "How about that?" "I've never inseminated so many in one day." "So in nine months I'm going to have 93 children." "What's up?" "It's two in the morning." "Christ." "Take off your boots." "l'm going out again." "Why?" "I was thinking of going to Jacinto's bar for a drink." "At two in the morning?" "Yeah." "Laura." "Laura, open the door." "What's wrong, Laura?" "How often have you lied to me?" "Never." "Another lie." "l swear..." "You've built a life based on lies and now you don't even know when you're doing it." "Does it hurt you?" "lt hurts me... lt disconcerts me..." "And now what?" "How am I supposed to feel now?" "Put down your case." "Why?" "You can't leave like this." "Like what?" "Like you were running away." "The taxi." "If we do this let's be civilized about it." "Civilized?" "You and I are happy." "Aren't we?" "We tried to be." "You think there's no other way?" "lt's best for both of us." "Where are you going?" "On the street, anywhere." "Anywhere is better than here." "Are you going to tell your father?" "I'm not a child." "I can cope with a separation on my own." "Or I should learn to." "l'm not a bad person." "I'm not a bad person." "The number you are calling ls unavailable." "The number you are calling..." "Where have you been?" "Where's the truck?" "Where were you?" "I tried to call you." "My battery's flat." "You were to be back in 20 minutes." "It's been seven hours." "lt got complicated." "The truck?" "They've gone." "We saw cars down there, and police, and Juanfran took off." "Where have they gone?" "To Portugal." "Are they crazy?" "Didn't I go for money last night to pay urgently, in advance?" "Yes, in advance, urgently, last night." "Now it's not in advance." "A lot's happened." "What's happened?" "Let's get in the car." "I'm frozen." "Got the money?" "Of course." "Give it to me." "Why?" "To give it to Juanfran." "Didn't they leave?" "You're right." "God, I can't even think." "I'm frozen." "It's so cold." "I was so fucking cold!" "And your wife?" "My ex-wife." "I've got a problem there." "You've got two problems." "Your wife and me." "I'm your problem." "I love that problem." "I need a coffee." "It'll all be OK." "l know." "lt's going to be great." "What's the plan?" "We'll meet in Portugal." "OK." "Were they happy about that?" "What do you think?" "We'll explain and they'll understand." "Anyway, they have the bullocks." "Yes, but when Juanfran doesn't want to understand, no matter how much you explain..." "The important thing now is to stay calm, be intelligent." "We've got two days, right?" "Saturday, we'll be in Portugal." "I love this problem." "Wow!" "I see why you don't want to leave." "This is the gingerbread house." "Fuck!" "Like it?" "lt's great!" "Shit!" "This was a cabin." "This part here." "And bit by bit..." "The silence!" "Some people can't stand silence." "Some people can't be silent." "I like that you like it." "And..." "She's really gone?" "Definitely." "You needn't worry." "It's over, she won't be back." "And I was the detonator." "The detonator." "Now what do we do?" "Whatever you want." "No." "Give me a kiss." "Aren't you answering?" "No." "Well, new plates for the truck would be another thousand, but we won't need them." "There aren't as many police in Portugal." "But we should paint it." "We'll paint it this color." "It's my favorite color." "We'll paint the truck and go to the Ben Harper concert." "He's playing in Lisbon next Friday." "I'd really love to wait for him backstage!" "You know you two have the same birthday?" "No, I didn't." "October 28." "Yeah?" "I think that's why I like you so much." "Not because we're from the same herd?" "Who says Ben Harper isn't?" "That's true." "Did you know we all used to be black?" "No." "Thousands of years ago, I mean." "So Ben Harper could have come from our herd." "Just like..." "Bruce Lee or Patrick Swayze." "I prefer Ben Harper." "Well, when we see him backstage we'll tell him we're following the whole tour." "Vigo," "San Sebastian, Toulouse, Barcelona, it'll blow his mind." "ls it your wife?" "No." "Who is it?" "I don't know." "Don't answer it!" "Maybe it's important." "Like what?" "If it was Juanfran he'd call me." "Nacho, come back!" "Nacho!" "The police." "You're kidding." "No." "What is it?" "Don't scare me." "What is it?" "A mile from Badajoz, near Villanueva del Fresno, a truck full of bullocks has overturned." "What?" "You heard." "Why did they call you?" "They know I lost some bullocks." "Oh, Christ!" "Three bullocks escaped." "The other two are dead." "And Juanfran?" "The driver ran off." "That's all they know." "What are you doing?" "Juanfran didn't call me." "I hope he's all right." "Who are you calling?" "Juanfran." "What about me?" "He's my brother's friend." "But if he was caught and you call him, they'll come for you." "Didn't you say no one was caught?" "Just in case." "Fuck!" "Nacho." "Maybe we've made a mistake." "Do you regret it?" "Not what we've done, I regret how we did it." "How should we have done it?" "With fucking time!" "Thinking!" "Not letting ourselves be carried away by an impulse, Christ!" "I'll never change." "I'm a disaster." "Nobody can stop this." "Why do we have to stop it?" "Let's go!" "Where?" "To Lisbon." "We've got no money now." "Would you rather stay here?" "Let's go, we'll think of something." "We'll find work." "What are you saying?" "So we can fix this." "Don't you see that the way to fix it isn't by going to Portugal now?" "What do you want to do?" "Find Juanfran and the others, so they don't go to the police." "Juanfran won't do that." "OK, fine." "We have to find him." "How do we do that?" "Nacho!" "Wait, let me think." "Nacho!" "Let me think." "Let me think." "Think." "Let me think." "Nacho." "Right, that's it." "We'll act as if nothing's happened, OK?" "We'll go to Praia Grande." "No." "Going to Portugal would be like walking into trouble." "Then let's just go somewhere." "Calm down, it's all right." "We're going to do the least bad thing." "We're going to go very calmly and find Juanfran, OK?" "Where?" "Where the truck overturned." "Villanueva del Fresno?" "Near there." "Are you sure?" "Yes." "Isn't it dangerous?" "Right now, everything is." "Juanfran won't give us away!" "OK, all right, but if the police catch him, in 24 hours you and I will be in prison and they'll be out on the street." "You know what happens?" "When people have problems they get nervous, they lose control and that's when..." "Juanfran won't do anything stupid." "Fine." "Neither will we." "If we do things right it might be OK." "Have you any clothes?" "Just what's in my bag." "Get your bag, I'm going to get some pants, tee shirts..." "OK." "lt'll all work out." "If we keep trusting each other it'll all work out." "Will I get it?" "No." "Yes?" "Are you OK?" "Yes." "What?" "Fuck!" "Where?" "Yes." "Fuck." "OK." "You stay there." "I'm on my way." "We're leaving now." "Take care, all right?" "What?" "Fuck!" "What?" "They stopped Roque and Bruno." "They've got them." "What?" "Juanfran rang Roque's sister and she told him." "Fuck." "How is he?" "He's OK, he thinks he's got a broken leg and he's got no money." "He wants us to go there." "Where?" "A bar that's at exit 38 on the A5, near Badajoz." "His leg's broken?" "So he says." "He jumped from the truck before it overturned." "Then he went to the bar." "He's going to sit there with a broken leg?" "What else can he do?" "What is it, Nacho?" "I'm thinking." "I think we shouldn't both go." "It's best if you go alone." "That's the best thing." "I'll give you the envelope for him." "You go and give him the money." "You want me to go on my own?" "Yes, to help him." "Here." "And you?" "l'll stay here in case the police want to talk to me." "How do I get there?" "From here there's a train to Madrid every half hour." "From there, take a train to Badajoz." "Then get a taxi to the bar where Juanfran is." "Call him and arrange it." "Come with me." "We can go on to Lisbon." "Tomorrow." "What?" "Call me from Badajoz." "I'll make an excuse so no one suspects if I disappear." "And we'll go to Lisbon?" "Yes, I'll pick you up." "OK?" "You won't regret this, I swear." "No, love." "Nacho." "What?" "Do you still love me?" "Lots." "Nacho..." "Are you there?" "I'm ln the bar, but I don't see Juanfran." "Where the hell are you?" "If this ls a joke, lt's not funny." "Where are you?" "Do you hear me?" "Marga?" "Marga, it's Nacho." "Nacho?" "Nacho Nacho?" "No, it's not urgent, but..." "Well, it is, a bit." "I've got a problem." "A problem, yes." "I'd like to talk to you." "Why me?" "You call me but you don't know why?" "It was instinctive." "Instinctive, yes." "And you said it, remember?" "Things change and one day I'd need you." "You can't warn about those things." "I swear I wanted to buy another five bullocks and give them back." "Why did you do it?" "That girl Ona got me mixed up in it." "A girl of 20..." "She's smart, you should meet her." "She arranged everything." "Then she's not that smart." "I had a feeling that it wasn't going to work out." "So why did you go on?" "l'd given my word." "Your word?" "Yes, my word." "It's easy to talk now." "Your word that you'd steal from your father-in-law and leave your wife." "Not leave my wife." "I didn't leave her, she left me." "You were going to Lisbon." "l'm here, I didn't go." "Because it went wrong." "And even so, I'm still here." "What do you want from me?" "Some advice." "Why didn't you call me before you got into this mess?" "You know the saying about St. Barbara and thunder.." "No." "I'm not in jail yet, we can do something." "Where's the girl now?" "ln Portugal." "And her friends?" "One's with her and the others are in jail." "They'll give us away, they're not going to take all the blame." "What does your wife know?" "Nothing." "She doesn't suspect you?" "l suppose not." "How much are the bullocks worth?" "A lot." "How much?" "5 or 6,000 each." "So, between 25 and 30,000." "More or less." "Can you get that money?" "Marga... lf l could get that money, I wouldn't be in this mess." "You can't borrow it from anyone?" "You know how much you could get?" "No." "More than two years." "l haven't got a record." "Even so, you'd go to prison." "Fuck." "What world do you live in?" "Why?" "You steal from your father-in-law, plan to run away with some girl, and you say you didn't know it could get complicated!" "This isn't a game!" "Don't give out to me... I'm not, I'm telling you how things are." "You didn't have to come for that." "You rang me." "To help me find a solution." "There is none." "There must be." "No, there isn't." "You've fucked up, OK?" "So accept it." "What do you mean?" "For once, get ahead of things." "That's what I'm doing." "Apologize to your father-in-law before he finds out." "No, I won't." "lt's the only way to defuse things." "But Marga..." "What do I say?" ""Look, I'm sorry..."" "lt's the best way." "Marga, please!" ""l'm sorry, I got carried away and I stole five of your bullocks"." ""No problem, champ"." "What world do you live in, Marga?" "Why won't you tell the truth?" "It wouldn't solve anything." "lt would solve a lot of things." "Like what?" "To start with, he mightn't report you." "And if he does, you'll have the mitigating factor of repentance." "It's your only answer." "Accept it and face up to him." "You don't know him, he's an animal." "Are you scared of him?" "No, it's not that." "Then what is it?" "Well... I'd thought of something else." "What is it?" "A solution along the lines of getting ahead of things." "l wanted to ask you about it." "What solution?" "It's heavy, but in my situation I don't have many options." "This is a letter to my father-in-law." "A letter..." "Apologizing?" "Asking him not to report me." "ln exchange for what?" "For me not reporting him." "Marga, my father-in-law is something else." "I've found out about a lot of things." "He's been swindling his partner for 16 years." "He fiddles the books and the other guy doesn't notice." "He's had four cases of mad cows while I've been with him." "And I didn't report him." "What?" "He burned them and buried them in a poplar grove on the farm." "That way, he didn't have to put down the whole herd." "How do you know that?" "l helped him." "You were his accomplice?" "You've built up a great CV these years... I was working for him." "Are you still working for him?" "l have the weekend free." "He'd have been charged with a crime against public health." "He'd have been ruined." "Now you want to blackmail him." "To reach an agreement." "This, Nacho, is insane." "Everything in there is the truth." "And you're going to mail it?" "I'd thought that my lawyer could take it to him." "Me?" "Don't be angry." "It's just an idea, you're a lawyer, tell him that to keep it simple the best thing is an agreement." "You want me to blackmail him?" "Don't get upset... I'll get upset if I want to." "Who do you think I am?" "What you are, a lawyer." "Do you always stick to the rules?" "Go to hell." "lt's just a suggestion." "Like hell!" "You're asking me to commit a crime!" "Just bring him the letter." "That's all?" "l'm sorry..." "You're not sorry!" "You're still a manipulator." "Who, me?" "You call, you ask me to come so I can help you to scare your father-in-law." "The bastard deserves it." "What about everyone else?" "The mess you could get me into?" "You don't understand." "Understand what?" "I'm trapped, I don't know how to get out of this." "I've lost everything, the bullocks, my job..." "Put yourself in my place." "I thought you'd changed but you're still as selfish as ever." "The same Nacho as 10, 15 years ago." "And 43 years ago. I was a bastard by the time I was crawling!" "Make the most of it, Marga." "I'm cornered, they're ruining me." "Marga, have some...!" "Some what?" "Pity." "You think I'm still the same idiot?" "l never thought that." "You don't remember what you did?" "You're hurt by what happened and you're mixing things up." "I'll mix whatever I want, it's my life and you fucked it up." "l fucked it up?" "Yes, you did." "Or rather, you tried to." "You realize now?" "lf that's what you think..." "No, that's how it was." "Don't you remember?" "All right, but you know what I think?" "That I did you a favor." "Afavor?" "Yes, we were very young and you've had time to rebuild your life." "You're beautiful, you have a good job as a lawyer, and look at me." "What?" "I'm 43, earning a miserable wage, one I'm about to lose, I smoke, I don't look after myself, I feel older than I am, I've got no savings, no pension plan," "the car l have is my father-in-law's..." "You have a house." "Half is my father-in-law's." "And if I don't pay what I owe him in two months, he'll take it." "You want me to feel sorry?" "No." "I want you to know that others have had a bad time." "l don't want to talk about that." "You started it." "Let's keep going." "Remember my plan to go and look after gorillas in Gabon?" "No, but I don't care." "And the fish factory in New Caledonia?" "We all make plans that don't turn out." "But none of mine turned out." "Not New Caledonia, not Gabon, not Morocco, not Brazil, not even looking after goats here in Gredos." "Know what I did?" "I was serving drinks for three years in a bar, paying a fortune for a lousy room in Madrid to go and sleep at 5:00 a.m. when I got off work." "And for my vacation?" "I worked like a fucking mule on a camp site until I got a spur from walking up and down the site in thongs." "A spur?" "A spur." "The most ridiculous fucking pain you can imagine." "Without an operation, I could go lame." "And obviously I can't pay for the operation." "So I can't run or walk." "I loved going for walks, remember?" "Now tell me again I fucked up your life." "And if I hurt you, I apologize." "I'm sorry." "More than you can imagine." "I wish I could go back 10 years." "What would you do differently?" "Differently?" "Everything." "So we'd be married, with three kids, and perfectly happy." "is that what you're saying?" "No, Marga, you and I would never be happy." "But there's a margin between what happened and this." "When did you realize?" "A long time ago." "You could have called and told me." "I'm telling you now." "I still think you should apologize to your father-in-law and your wife." "What I want is to be at peace with you." "What's peace for you?" "That there's no resentment or bitterness left." "I could say yes but it isn't easy." "Why?" "Because it isn't." "I spent many years with you, I was madly in love and one day I realized you didn't care about me." "l did care about you." "lt doesn't matter." "It does matter, take your chance." "Say what you want." "You'd love that." "What?" "Yes, with this crisis of yours, and that insecurity I notice, you'd love to remember that time when you felt capable of walking over anyone." "l didn't walk over anyone." "Over me, Nacho!" "Will I remind you of all that happened that morning?" "The sound of the lock when you came in, your footsteps, your voice, "Hi, Marga"." "I was at the window, drinking tea, and you stood at the sitting room door, without speaking." "We stood in silence for a while and then looked at each other." "You said you were going to do practical work in Marrakech." "You wouldn't be back for a while." "Then you took your things, your notebooks, some clothes, and your gum boots." "No one uses gum boots in Marrakech, Nacho." "As soon as you went out, I left after you and never went back." "I asked my mother to take everything." "Why didn't you warn me?" "Why didn't I warn you?" "You knew you were like that." "You knew I was crazy about you, you knew what would happen, why didn't you warn me?" "You can't warn about those things." "What'll you do?" "About what?" "You won't be able to go back to the life you've had." "And you're too old to be serving drinks." "Ask your mother for the money." "No!" "My mother is the last person I'd ask." "You still get on badly?" "Neither good nor bad," "but she wouldn't do it." "She's not short of money." "No, she's got more than enough." "She says I'm in debt to her, you know her." "Listen, if this ends up in court, would you defend me?" "Lots of lawyers would do it better than me." "Yeah..." "And if I don't want that?" "You're the fucking limit!" "What?" "Why?" "Mom!" "It's me, Nacho." "What do you mean "Nacho who?" Your son." "Fine, fine..." "Listen, there's something..." "Yes." "No." "You don't discuss those things with your mother." "I'm listening." "Whatever you have to say, say it now." "That way, I can relax afterwards while I'm having my tea." "Well, as you wish... I need you to lend me 30,000 euros." "Continue." "That's it, really." "You must have something more to say." "I could explain everything but you'd think it unimportant." "Why would I?" "Because, whatever it is, you'll think I did something wrong, so I'll just tell you the outcome, which is that I need 30,000 euros." "If you say no, you don't have to pretend that you're worried, I won't have to pretend I persuade you." "And you say I'm ironic." "l'm your son, it shows." "As you're my son I've got a right to know what happened." "But why?" "To decide if I'll give you money or moral support, which is good too." "Moral support?" "It's the least a mother can do." "But if it's any consolation, I brought my check book." "How did you know I'd ask for money?" "Call it instinct." "lnstinct..." "What did you call that Nazi who said:" ""Whenever I hear the word "culture" l reach for my gun"?" "I don't know..." "Don't get me wrong, but whenever you call me I reach for my check book." "Goering!" "What?" "The Nazi who said that was called Goering." "Goering... I took some of my father-in-law's bullocks to sell them in Portugal, and it all went wrong." "Now I have to pay what they were worth or I'll go to jail." "So you took some bullocks..." "You mean you stole some bullocks." "Yes, call it what you want." "Yeah." "You wanted to sell them in Portugal." "Yes." "And that's why Laura left you." "No, it's got nothing to do with Laura." "They're two different crises." "lt's odd, but my instinct tells me there's something missing here." "I don't know..." "What?" "Another woman, perhaps?" "That's got nothing to do with it." "Hey, it's not that intern I saw you with in Madrid one day, buying..." "What was it?" "Gloves for inseminating cows?" "Yes." "Don't tell me she was the one who got you into all this." "That isn't the problem." "lt's the origin of the problem." "The origin doesn't matter." "What matters is if you can help me." "Are you sure that giving you money is the best way to help you?" "What do you mean?" "It's obvious." "What's obvious?" "You're in your 40s and you still haven't grown up." "What do you mean by that?" "You can't go on like this." "At some point you'll have to learn to solve your problems yourself." "How often have I asked you for money?" "That doesn't matter." "lt does." "It seems whenever I have a problem I call you, and it isn't true." "lt isn't true?" "No." "lf you knew only half the things..." "Well, with half you nearly emptied my account." "What?" "Yes." "The money I gave you when you wrecked your first car." "When you decided to go and study in Paris, who paid?" "I was 19!" "And the fine when you stole in the camp site?" "And who paid for that animal documentary?" "How old were you then?" "Almost 40?" "l paid you back." "No." "No, only half, and as well you got angry because I said you couldn't go on like that." "Instead of being grateful you told me to go to hell." "You called me a usurer and said you'd never ask for anything again." "What are you getting at?" "Son, you have to learn." "I have to go to jail?" "Well, maybe you have." "I can't believe my ears." "Believe it, dear." "Do you realize what you've just said?" "How can you think that jail is healthy?" "Someone said jail was the university of revolutionaries." "Maybe it was Lenin, or Fidel Castro... I don't give a shit about them, I'm your son!" "Weren't you an anarchist once?" "Mom!" "Oh, Nacho!" "This may seem hard to you but really I'm doing you a favor." "Afavor?" "Yes, and you know what I regret?" "That I didn't do it sooner." "I'm sorry I spoiled you." "You didn't spoil me." "Oh, no?" "I gave you everything!" "From you were born, everything!" "You just gave me money, not because you were good and understanding," "but because you felt guilty." "Guilty?" "For not giving me other things." "Such as what?" "Such as a kiss, a hug, love, what you give to children." "You're talking nonsense." "Your check book fixed everything." "I don't call you and you reach for your check book." "You reared me like that." "Those are excuses." "lt's the truth." "You never gave a shit about me." "How can you...?" "Like I was to blame for the lousy way dad treated you." "That's a lie!" "Then why are you upset?" "l'm not." "You're shouting." "You're not telling the truth." "What truth?" "Yours, mine, the neighbor's?" "It's best if I go." "But I'm making tea." "Goodbye, Nacho." "That's too bad, I was going to talk about Javi Carrascosa." "What did you say?" "Javi Carrascosa, my friend, the radiologist." "Shall we talk about him?" "I don't know what you mean." "You don't know what I mean?" "No." "I met him the other day." "He asked about you." "He looks great." "Did you know he'd separated?" "What's that got to do with me?" "What's that got...?" "You know we're friends, do you think he didn't tell me" "about you two?" "There was nothing." "Really?" "No." "Then he's got an amazing imagination." "You were leaving, right?" "Thanks for coming." "And thanks for your moral support." "What did he tell you?" "Some tea?" "What happened with Javi has nothing to do with you." "In a way, it has." "He finished with you because I asked him." "What?" "I asked him." "You asked him?" "ln a way." "Why?" "Do I have to tell you?" "Of course." "No one likes his mother sleeping with his friend." "I have a right to know men." "Yes, and screw whoever you want," "but not a friend of mine." "Don't speak to me like that." "I thought it was ridiculous." "You're no one to judge me." "l'm your son." "That doesn't give you any rights." "No." "We each have our own life, and I don't have to give explanations to anyone." "Not even your son?" "Not even my son." "Get it into your head that I'm two different people, your mother and Amparo Jimenez, and you have no right over the latter." "Try to remember that." "From now on we won't mix things up." "What happened with Javi happened, that's all." "That's all?" "Why did you tell him to stop seeing me?" "No, I didn't tell him that." "l didn't..." "What did you tell him?" "I apologized to him, that's what I did." "Why?" "l told him I was sorry, and he should forgive you." "And he wasn't to hurt you, that's what I told him." "And he decided that the best way not to hurt you was to stop seeing you, but it was his decision." "lt was very embarrassing for me." "Then why did you do it?" "Common sense." "Common sense?" "Someone had to have it." "Why didn't you ask me?" "Why didn't you ask me?" "I didn't know how to." "You could have talked to me the way you talked to him." "It's not the same." "He's my friend, you're my mother." "And?" "You don't discuss that with your mother." "Why not?" "Because it doesn't make sense." "Yes, it does." "No." "Not for me, maybe it's something religious, atavistic... I can't say to my mother:" ""Mom, don't sleep with my friend"." "Can't I sleep with a man?" "ls it too much for you?" "Any son would do the same." "Liar, you did it because you're selfish." "I did it so they wouldn't laugh at you." "Who?" "People." "Like who?" "People, mom!" "Javi, his wife, my friends." "And you?" "Not me." "Not you?" "Not me." "Not me." "lt didn't make you laugh?" "Not at all, I was embarrassed." "You should have put up with it!" "l couldn't." "Because you're selfish." "Because no one likes his mother behaving like a whore." "It's for the bearer." "What?" "lt's for the bearer." "Why didn't you put my name?" "Tomorrow's Saturday, the banks are closed." "I thought you wanted to sort this out quickly." "You needn't wait until Monday." "But I can tear this up and write one in your name." "No, it's all right." "Are you sure?" "Yes." "OK." "It's for 15,000." "Yes." "I need 30,000." "For the moment, I'll give you 15,000." "For the moment?" "Then we'll see." "See what?" "How things go." "What things?" "Yours, mine... I don't understand." "There are two questions here." "Some dead bulls and a relationship that's over." "Oh, you're punishing me." "No, no." "OK, OK." "If I see that you're capable of resolving the business with your father-in-law I'd have no problem giving you the other 1 ,000 euros." "15,000." "Well, the other 15,000." "A prize." "Exactly." "And you know what?" "I wouldn't ask you to pay it back." "And you want me to thank you?" "No, I just want you to put it away." "And, for once, that we stop talking about money." "Well, I'm off." "Do you have a lawyer?" "No, why?" "ln case you can't sort things out." "Would you lend me yours?" "l want things to work out well." "As well as they can work out for 15,000 euros." "Bye, son." "I'll ask my sister-in-law to lend me a hand." "You get on well with her?" "Much better than with Laura." "You're not going to jump out of the frying pan into the fire?" "Nacho?" "What's up?" "Can you talk?" "Can you talk?" "Yeah, listen, it's..." "Can we meet?" "I'd like to talk to you about something." "On the road?" "The perfect woman." "Are you alone?" "Yes." "Of course." "How about "hello"?" "l'm sorry, hello." "How are you?" "Something happened, I'm a bit scared." "What's happened?" "I don't think anyone followed you." "Who'd follow me?" "I don't understand." "You know about the bullocks?" "Yes, Laura told me." "What did she say?" "That someone stole them." "What else?" "Nothing much." "What's up?" "Did you bring me out here to play guessing games?" "No, I'd no one else to call." "And you know that Laura left?" "Where is she?" "ln Marbella." "What else?" "That you had a row." "Does your father know we've split up?" "I don't know." "He probably thinks I'm behind all this too." "Behind what?" "Behind what?" "Look, tell me what's wrong!" "They tricked me." "Who did?" "That intern told me there was a stockbreeder in Portugal who paid double for bullocks." "You stole them?" "No, I wanted money to invest in the farm." "Your father always says I've no initiative." "I thought I could invest the money in computerizing the farm, in cutting costs." "With a computer we wouldn't lose a drop of milk." "You're a dickhead." "And what the hell do I do now?" "Tell me, what?" "First, calm down a bit." "Relax." "I'm a fucking coward." "I'm scared." "Why?" "If you saw what they did in my house..." "What did they do?" "I don't dare go on my own." "You want me to go with you?" "Shall we go?" "I'll follow you." "They tore out everything, windows, doors..." "There they are." "The worst thing is I'm not surprised." "By what?" "That my father would do this." "You think he did it?" "Don't you know him?" "Fuck..." "He loves his cows more than anything." "More than his daughters?" "You're asking that?" "I just know that your father or whoever did this has evicted me without throwing me out." "How about that?" "Very clever." "If it was your father, it all fits." "Nacho, what do you want from me?" "What's that?" "A check for 15,000 euros." "I'd like you to give it to your father." "It's not the full value of the bullocks, but in some way I accept responsibility for letting myself be tricked." "I'd like you to tell your father." "You think it'll calm him down?" "l don't know." "I can't do anything else, this is all I have." "I haven't got a job or anyone to help me, I haven't got a family, or bulls..." "Your father owns half of this house." "Don't be like that." "How should I be?" "I never see my father but, if you want, I'll give him this." "I've been worrying about this and thinking: "Call Carmen"." ""She'll understand, she knows her father"." "Of course I know him!" "No, some women have a strange thing about their fathers..." "Look at Laura, she adores him, she can't see any fault in him." "She'd blame me for everything." "I've got my faults, but..." "She never supported me." "l'm sorry for involving you." "lt's all right." "We're family." "Look... I'll tell my father what happened, try to get him to understand." "It'll be hard, but I'll try." "Thank you." "Thank you for being here, thank you." "I'm sorry..." "You needn't worry." "Yes, I do." "Yes, I do." "Yes, I do." "I let that girl get me mixed up in this... lt's possible." "She looks so innocent..." "You know her?" "I've seen her around." "She's very pretty." "Yeah..." "Yes, but I don't know if..." "She's a sly one." "She gave you something." "Yeah, well... lt's OK, I'm not judging you." "My sister always has the same problem with guys." "And what is it?" "They get fed up." "And if there's a pretty girl around... lt was no big deal." "Yeah." "Sure." "Listen to you." "You know she's not the kind of woman I like." "Why do I know?" "l've told you." "Me?" "What did you tell me?" "Forget it." "No, tell me." "Forget it." "I want to know." "You know the music I like, the books I read, the films I like, what I want in a partner, right?" "I don't know." "l don't know." "Come on, Carmen." "Don't you have an idea of the kind of woman I like?" "Why do you think I called you?" "I called you because at the worst moments you look for people you really connect with." "And I swear, when I thought of you I said, "Christ, no."" ""Don't get her mixed up in this"." "You know why I did?" "What are you doing?" "Telling you things I wanted to tell you long ago." "And why now?" "l've got nothing to lose." "I'm alone." "Remember the day we smoked joints here and watched that film?" "Remember the title?" "Of the film?" "Wait..." "No, I don't." "I remember your sister was upstairs and we were here until five in the morning!" "Telling each other things, giggling like kids..." "After that day, for two months I had you in here." "Stuck there." "Do you mind me telling you?" "No." "Are you uncomfortable?" "No." "No?" "No." "No, stop, stop..." "No, no, not this." "This isn't right." "No." "lt's not right." "No." "That window?" "What?" "Why didn't he take it out?" "l don't know." "We can call and ask him." "Can it be fixed?" "Why the fuss about a window?" "No, Laura and you." "Can it be fixed?" "Do you think I've got a choice at this stage?" "And if you did?" "lt doesn't matter." "It does matter." "I want to know." "Why?" "Would you leave your boyfriend for me?" "Your father will have a heart attack and your sister will hate you." "She hates me already." "Yeah?" "Surprised?" "You didn't tell her anything...?" "No, because there was nothing to tell." "I mean the chemistry that was always there." "No, she knows nothing." "Listen, Nacho, I'm going to be very honest." "Go on." "l don't think it's fair." "What?" "That you give that money to my father." "You should keep it." "The 15,000 euros?" "You did it in a moment of weakness." "You just wanted to help." "You'll never convince him with that." "I can use another reason." "What reason?" "All the money he never paid you over the years." "What money?" "He's being paying you a pittance." "The vet before you charged 300 and knew nothing about artificial insemination" "300 euros?" "320, to be precise." "How do you know?" "l use my father's accountant." "Yeah?" "He pays for it." "You know, guilt moves mountains." "Why did you never tell me?" "lt was none of my business." "And now it is?" "You'd look stupid giving back money that should be yours." "I calculated how much he saved with you, it's over 9,000 euros." "l can't believe it." "What?" "That you calculated how much he saved with me." "I care about you." "You do?" "After all this time I've got fond of you." "Say me how many cows have you inseminated since you came here?" "All of them." "Every year." "700 by 3 years, work it out." "It's like you've given life to over 2,000 creatures on my father's farm." "And none of them is yours." "Yeah." "And now you've taken five." "Who owns the other 1 ,995?" "Your father." "And you want to give him 30,000 euros?" "15,000." "You want to give him 15,000." "I'll think about it." "You should." "Why are you leaving?" "l have to teach a class." "As you told me something, I'll tell you something." "Laura never told you the truth." "About what?" "She knows I always liked you, I told her." "What did you tell her?" "That if I hadn't met her, I'd have gone after you." "I told her you were the perfect woman." "The perfect woman!" "For me, yes." "Yes, you're calm but you're lively, mature for your age, pretty, independent, you're sweet, you're..." "Shall I go on?" "What did she say?" "That you weren't perfect." "Nobody is." "But she told me why you weren't." "She said you had a pelvic disease when you were 15, right?" "You can't have children." "That's why you never dared?" "No, not at all, children for me..." "Your sister wanted kids and I didn't care." "That isn't the same as knowing you can't have them." "Well..." "Tell me one thing, honestly, why did you call me?" "Because I've always liked you." "What about you?" "I'm not sure you're a good person." "Good afternoon." "I'd like to make an appointment." "It's..." "I've got a problem." "My number is 696 88 28 64." "It's kind of urgent." "Thank you." "A scream." "l have to charge for travel." "Yes, you told me." "lt's 50 euros." "No problem." "Your house is lovely." "Yes, it's cozy." "Have you had it long?" "15 years or so." "You have no photos." "I said in the message that my wife had left me." "And you took down the photos?" "No, there weren't any." "We weren't into photos." "Maybe, as we'd no children..." "Listen, I came here because that story you told me about your father-in-law and the bullocks seemed like an anxiety attack." "And because I offered you 500 euros." "That's right, excuse me." "I'd forgotten, here." "Count it." "What I mean is that... whatever it is, I can't come here and cure it like it was a toothache." "I've come so we can meet and talk, but treatment is long, and you have to participate in the process too." "I don't want to be psychoanalyzed." "So why did you call me?" "So you can give me a temporary derangement report." "Excuse me?" "So you can give me a temporary derangement report." "Aren't you a psychologist?" "You sign the paper and you take the 500 euros." "I think there's some confusion." "No, it's the only way I can avoid being jailed for stealing the bullocks." "Look, have you spoken to a lawyer?" "Yes, and she told me to speak to a psychologist." "Did she say I'd give you a false report?" "No, no." "It won't be false." "You test me and you'll see if I'm deranged or not." "Really." "Do you know what temporary derangement is?" "I know what it is to spend 12 hours in cow shit, up to your eyes in mud, you get home and your wife says how great her father is and what shit you are, and how that can drive you crazy," "which in your language is:" ""temporary derangement"," ""how crazy you can be at times"." "I think there's a misunderstanding." "You've done it before." "What have I done?" "Derangement reports, I've seen it on Internet." "What did you see?" "You're in a lot of forums." "People talk well of you, they say you're shit hot." "And that I give false reports?" "No, no!" "They say you're good at this." "One guy said he got back custody of his son because of the great report you gave." "I do my job the most professional way I know." "That's what I want." "No." "You want me to do a report without an evaluation?" "That's what you want." "OK, that's true, sorry." "Come on, evaluate me." "I've been honest since you got here." "I screwed up with the bullocks." "But I don't want to go to jail." "This is very delicate..." "Fuck, you've had worse cases." "What cases?" "That guy who killed his brother's boyfriend because he panicked when he thought he wanted to rape him." "That was a case of real derangement." "Really?" "People are fucked up." "And the woman who burned her husband's testicles?" "That's on Internet?" "Christ!" "No!" "Javi Carrascosa told me that." "Don't tell him I told you." "I didn't kill anyone." "I don't know why you're surprised at what I'm asking." "A guy doesn't offer you 500 euros to get rid of his fear of spiders." "I don't care if your reports are true or false." "I just want you to help me." "Have you tried talking to your father-in-law?" "That's impossible." "Why?" "He's an animal." "When's the trial?" "He hasn't reported me yet." "What do you mean?" "No, it's..." "He only suspects, he doesn't have any proof." "Well, then?" "Sooner or later he will have." "I'm just getting a step ahead." "And if nothing happens?" "And if it does?" "A derangement report doesn't guarantee you'll get off." "But it'll help, right?" "Your father-in-law will get an expert to prove you're OK." "That's his problem." "No, judges aren't stupid." "This isn't like trying to avoid military service." "I have to risk it." "Have you ever considered going into therapy?" "If this works, I'll do ten years of therapy with you." "You see no other solution?" "None." "You're sure?" "Yes." "l'm sure." "l don't know." "What?" "Just imagine: we go to trial, I do a report, I sign it, it's proved you're all right... I've got my reputation." "What do you want?" "1 ,000 euros?" "It's not a question of money." "Then what is it?" "That you resolve it." "Your problem." "My problem is the trial." "No." "From what you say, your problem is that you did what you did." "I think we should look for the possibilities to correct what makes you function..." "Andrea, I'm not that stupid, really." "You write the derangement report and I guarantee that at the trial I'll make you look great." "And then if you want, I'll sign up for ten years of therapy." "If you say no, I'll find another psychologist, even if he's worse." "You're blackmailing me." "I'm just trying to be honest with you all the time." "That's not easy for me." "I'll tell you what, but I'm promising nothing." "Forget about the money and I'll ask you some questions." "What for?" "To draw up your profile." "To see if it fits with derangement." "l don't discount anything." "OK." "Age?" "43." "Marital status?" "Married, without children." "Profession, vet." "I've got no history of derangement." "l've never taken drugs." "No, I'll ask the questions." "OK?" "Sorry." "Try to define your character." "How do you mean?" "Quick tempered, impulsive, shy, phlegmatic..." "Not quick tempered." "No?" "I'd say shy, impulsive..." "Yes, impulsive." "Have you ever been on trial?" "Never." "Criminal record." "Nothing." "What do you think you need now?" "Not to be found guilty." "And what do you need for that?" "How do you...?" "If you go to trial..." "They have to understand me..." "And believe you." "And believe me." "Understand you..." "Who?" "Everyone." "Like who?" "Everyone, the judge, your father-in-law, me," "God, the fatherland..." "Yes..." "l need them to understand me." "And to believe you." "That'll be harder." "You'll try." "I'm going to try." "Describe simply what happened with the bullocks." "I wanted to change my life." "I was fed up." "So I decided to sell some bullocks in Portugal to get money." "On your own?" "No, with a girl, Ona." "Who is Ona?" "An intern, a young girl, we got involved." "And I lost direction a bit." "What happened with that girl?" "With Ona?" "What happened?" "She arranged with some pals who had a truck to transport the bullocks." "How many pals were there?" "4 or 5." "Four." "lt was planned." "Yes, of course." "Since when?" "A month." "A month?" "More or less." "So there's premeditation." "Forget about temporary derangement." "If I say I thought of it two days ago?" "What'll the others say?" "Right." "I'm a dickhead." "Well..." "How can we fix this?" "This..." "lt has to be fixed." "l'm sorry." "What if I said I've been deranged for a month?" "You can say you've been deranged all your life but forget about it being "temporary"." "What illness would fit me?" "Why not look for a solution instead of an illness?" "I'm looking for a solution." "Why do you keep postponing it?" "What?" "Your problem." "You stole the bullocks." "Instead of facing the problem you're looking for excuses not to face a trial that doesn't even exist when the easiest thing would be to apologize to your father-in-law." "l needn't apologize to anyone." "Then don't apologize." "Tell him why you did it." "What do I gain with that?" "What do you lose?" "I'm confessing I did it." "He's going to find out anyway." "Maybe you'll lose nothing." "Maybe he wants to hear the truth." "Why does everyone keep on about that?" "The fucking truth!" "Who's everyone?" "Everyone!" "Everyone!" "My lawyer, my mother, my sister-in-law..." "What do they keep on about?" "That I'm immature, I don't face up to things, and that's not true." "I'm 40 and I've taken a lot of shit." "Why do they keep on about it?" "l don't know." "They don't understand me." "Why do you think that is?" "l don't know." "I don't know." "Because there are parts of me they don't like." "I don't know." "What parts don't they like?" "l don't know." "For instance, Marga... I fucked up her life because I went off with someone else." "She says no, but it's true." "Who's Marga?" "My lawyer." "She's an ex-girlfriend?" "Yes." "She was the first one I rang when this happened. I trust her totally." "I don't know why I left her." "She's fantastic." "But maybe we wouldn't have got on." "Anyway... I'd like to have her as a friend." "I don't have a female friend." "It's hard, isn't it?" "Men and women..." "Do you have any male friends?" "What does your mother not like about you?" "That I'm a failure." "Are you a failure?" "Yes!" "Well, I don't know." "She doesn't like that I'm a vet." "She'd like me to work in an office in a fancy neighborhood and drive an Audi." "She doesn't like what I am." "Do you feel guilty about that?" "No, I do what I want. lf she doesn't like it, she can fuck off." "And your sister-in-law?" "She always... I've always had a special thing with her." "I rang her to intercede with my father-in-law." "You told her what you did." "Yes." "I told her." "I told her." "Why would she help you?" "Well..." "We have a special chemistry." "Really?" "Or we did, because here she suddenly started to say that I'm immature, that I don't face things, that I had to have done this 10 years ago, and all that after we'd screwed." "Just imagine." "You slept with your sister-in-law?" "Yes." "Yes, I did." "Nacho, are you aware of what you're telling me?" "Not really." "Nothing that you're doing will help fix things with your father-in-law." "It's as if you had to create a problem to cover the previous one." "You see?" "I don't see that." "We agree there." "You don't see it." "No, I don't." "It's a bit like what you're doing with me." "I've done nothing to you." "You want me to sign a false report to avoid confrontation." "Imagine you ask for a bank loan, you've no money, and instead of fixing it you get a loan from another bank, and another, until you explode." "So what do you advise?" "Become aware." "But what do I have to do?" "Do I tell my father-in-law about the bullocks, give him back the money, come clean...?" "Let me get my breath." "What'll I tell him?" "What would you tell him?" "Who?" "My father-in-law?" "The truth?" "Get it off your chest." "I'd say: "You bastard, you've manipulated me all this time"." ""l've worked for you"..." "Very good." "..."for three years"." ""You paid me 300 euros less than the other vet who hadn't a clue,"" ""and you didn't value me"." "But if I say that he's going to insult me." "lt doesn't matter." "He's an animal!" "You can keep the initiative if you stay coherent and respectful." "He's over there." "What?" "Talk to him." "Like he was there?" "What would you say?" "l want to laugh." "What would I say?" "Look, Andres..." "Andres, look..." "Don't hesitate." "He won't interrupt you." "That's good." "Will I tell him?" "Go on." "Andres, please don't interrupt me." "Yes..." "Andres, don't interrupt..." "Are you laughing at me?" "Of course not." "Sorry." "Andres, I stole the bullocks because I wanted to sell them in Portugal to get money to invest in the farm," "to computerize the farm and that way we wouldn't lose even a pint of milk..." "What's wrong?" "l can't say this." "Why?" "lt isn't true." "I'm lying again." "What do you mean?" "l wasn't going to do that." "No?" "No." "I wanted to keep the money, change my life and clear off." "That's the truth." "I'm doing it right." "Tell him." "Tell him what?" "Andres... I stole the bullocks." "That's it." "I stole them to sell them and start a new life because I can't take this anymore." "I know they were yours and one shouldn't do these things but I've done lots of things I shouldn't for you." "I buried sick cows, mad cows, so the Ministry wouldn't find out, and I didn't ask, I didn't judge you, I thought:" ""He'll have his reasons"." "Well, I've had mine too and you never considered them." "And you know I slaved for those cows." "I slaved!" "And you paid me shit." "You paid me 325 euros less than the other vet." "And I said nothing." "Go on." "I wanted everything to work out." "The..." "The bullocks..." "My marriage to Laura too." "Everything." "And I never said anything, and you know why?" "I thought: "One day they'll realize and they'll see what I'm worth"." "But it didn't happen." "You've never valued me." "It was always the same thing, you'd talk about responsibility for the family, for the bullocks, for children..." "You'll ask why I bring your daughter into this, but it's all the same, and the business with the bullocks is just a scream, a scream from someone who can't take any more!" "From someone who is asking for help!" "And I'm willing to pay." "I'll pay for what I've done." "But not just me." "To be fair, each one should pay for what they've done wrong." "Not just me." "And now...?" "Christ..." "This is heavy." "Shall we go outside?" "Yes." "l'll go to the bathroom." "Of course." "Are you all right?" "Yes, I want to splash my face." "I'll wait here." "What have I done?" "lt's strange." "What is?" "I've spoken to lots of people I know to see if they could help me and you turn up, we're total strangers, and in 30 minutes you help me more than anyone." "Everything looks easy from the outside." "Yes, I guess you have your problems." "Maybe it's a signal." "I want to tell you one thing." "l've never been in jail." "l know." "You know?" "And I don't want to go to jail." "I don't." "Well... I'm sorry you're leaving now." "It wasn't bad for a first session, was it?" "If you want to sleep here, I talk in my sleep... I'm not going to sleep with you." "Who said anything about that?" "See you next time." "I go to bed very late." "If you change your mind, call me." "Goodbye." "Thank you." "I mean it."