"Perv." "Patrick, your mother's watching." " She is not." " She is." "She's been there since last night, peering through the letterbox." "Don't be ridiculous." "She missed you." "A week's a long time." "Hey." "Come on." "Welcome home, darling." "Hello, Mum." " Hello, Ruth." " Hi." "You look pale." "Have you been working too hard?" " Not especially." " Frederick, they're here!" "Coming." " Hey, Dad." " Patrick." " Looking lovely." " Hi." "Lovely." " You'll get fat." " Nonsense." "His job's all nerves." "He needs a good, home-cooked meal." "Now, here's one we prepared earlier." "OK, what have I forgotten?" "It isn't a birthday." " Is it an anniversary?" " Oh, no, no." "Something much more exciting." "Come on." "I give up." "Dear old Mrs. Fisher passed away last month." " Oh, no." " And the Little House has come onto the market." "Seems she left it all to charity... cats, or orphans, or something." "Oh, I'm sorry, Ruth." " No offence." " None taken." "Anyway, after a life of thrift and caution, we went and did something rather rash." "You..." "No, you haven't, have you?" "Snapped it up, before it went on the market." "Oh, my God." "What did you pay?" "A lot less than if we'd waited, let's put it like that." "So how about we pop down after lunch and have a nose around, eh?" " Thank you." " If Ruth wants to, of course." "Yeah, yeah, sure." "It's just through the woods." "It's only a few minutes, just round the corner." " It's pretty." " Isn't it?" "Strange I've never noticed it before." "Can you see it from the house?" "If you know where to look." "It'd be a wonderful home for a young family." "They think they're buying it for us." " They're just getting over-excited." " Then put them out of their misery." "Please." "Come on." "We should go really, I've got loads of marking to do." "Oh, Ruth, come and look at this." "Isn't it fun?" "So much character." "Yeah." "I know that it isn't your scene, but it does have so much potential." "I'm sorry, Elizabeth, it's just not really me." "Just keep an open mind, that's all." "She's had a look around and that's all we can ask, isn't it, Ruth?" "How about a drink, before you set off?" "It's not that I don't love it, it's just that Ruth may need some convincing." "No need to rush anything." " Fancy a Pimm's?" " Yes, please." " Good." " That'd be lovely." "Thank you." " Are you OK?" " Fine." "Late, late, late, late, late." "You're quiet, this morning." "Yeah, sorry, I've got that deposition thingy." "Not thinking about the cottage, then?" "I am a bit." "This place is pretty poky and it is like a free house." "I'm just not ready for The Good Life yet, Patrick." "And, even if I was " "You wouldn't want to be down the lane from my parents." "Much as I love them, they're not my mum and dad." "Well, still, they'd have their uses." "Built-in baby-sitters for one." "That's a bit of a jump." "Yeah, sorry." "We're having our year in the States before we get into all that, aren't we?" "Yeah, absolutely, we are." "Finding my relatives is really important to me, Patrick." "I know, I know." "We're just talking." "It's castles in the air." "OK." "I will see you later." "Yeah." "Have a good day." "I will." "And you." "Bye." "Who can tell me which one is the biggest mammal?" " Blue whale." " Don't shout out, please." " The blue whale." " Very good." "10 flats is not what we agreed." "10 flats would be uninhabitable." "10 flats won't make you richer." "10 flats will be a bloody disaster." "Now, are you getting what I think about 10 flats?" "Ruthie, hey, it's me." "Yeah, listen, how about we try that new seafood place tonight?" "OK, I'll see you at eight." "Love you." "Bye." "Detention?" "No, Patrick's taking me out for dinner." "A bit like detention, then." "Fancy a drink?" "So what is it, anniversary?" "Uh-uh." "Need to put a bit of the old romance back?" "Sorry." "You were saying." "No, I wasn't." "No, his parents have bought us a place." "Right on their doorstep." "They want us to settle down and do the whole family thing." "Good for them." "What do you want?" "Well, I think Patrick's seriously up for it." "But what do you want?" "I dunno." "It's hard." "They're the only family I've got and I don't want to mess things up." "So you're gonna go along with it, out of politeness?" "No, no, I..." "Well, we've been married for five years, so maybe it is what I want." "Oh, shit." "I didn't realise the time." "I've got to go." "Sorry." "See you tomorrow." "Take care." "Sorry." "Sorry." "Sorry." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "What happened?" "I was having a drink with David and I lost track of the time." "So you were getting pissed with a bloke who's fancied you since college." "Not a great excuse, is it?" "It does have the virtue of being the truth." "What do you know about virtue?" "Anyway, he doesn't fancy me." "No, you're right, he loves you." "(LAUGHS)" "You could have dressed up a bit." "Why, are we celebrating something?" "No." "It's always nice to make the effort." "Well, primary school teachers do not dress up in stockings and heels." "That's a shame." "If I was your headmaster, I'd make it mandatory." "Really?" "And if you were behind in your marking," "I'd have to take you in hand." "Sounds ominous." "Patrick." "Look what you do to me." "Patrick." "I want you now." "What about?" "Lucky strike, like the old days." "Forget about it." "No." "Come on." "I love that red." "That's wonderful, isn't it?" "Looks good, doesn't she?" "Mmm." "# The First Noel" "They've had a lot of snow." "He does, doesn't he?" "I'm afraid so." "That's a stunning outfit." "Oh, little sweetheart." "Oh, leave that to me." "Please." "What is it, Ruth?" "I'm fine." "You look a little pale." "Too many Christmas parties, too much vodka." "I thought maybe you were harbouring a little secret." "What do you mean?" "Never mind." "We don't put the silver in the dishwasher." "You know what?" "I will leave it to you." "Thanks for lunch, it was lovely." "Ruthie, are you all right?" "No, not really." "What is it?" "Take a wild guess." "I look like shit." "I keep disappearing off to the toilet every five minutes and I've gone up a dress size." "You're pregnant?" "Well done." "Happy fucking Christmas." "Darling, that..." "That's" " God, that's wonderful." "No it isn't." "Come back down." "Come on." "Let's all celebrate." "Is this what you wanted?" "Is this your big plan?" "'Lucky strike, like in the old days.' No, no." "I am thrilled." "I" " I bet you are." "No more Ruth working." "No more trip to the States." "You're overreacting." "I'm not keeping it." "Let's not rush things." "I'm not rushing things." "All I'm saying is I have had days to think about it and I am not keeping it." "OK, if that's what you want." "A couple of observations." "There is no reason for you to stop work any longer than you want." "And they do let children on airlines, nowadays." "Do you think this is funny?" "No." "It's not funny." "It's not funny." "I need a cigarette." "You bastard." "Patrick rang while you were in the shower." "The meeting at the architect is going on late, so he'll be staying up in London." "Didn't he ask to speak to me?" "I thought you were in the shower." "Oh, I'll call him later." "I think he said he might have his phone switched off." "Look, I know you'll hate me for saying this, but don't cling, especially now." "Men can't bear it." "Robert?" "I thought you said this damp was being dealt with last week." "It's a bigger undertaking than I thought." "Is that 'builders speak' for 'I have too many jobs on'?" "Mrs. Clee" " This house MUST be finished by August." "My grandson won't wait." "Patrick, wake up." "I think the baby's coming." "What?" "Now?" "Mm-hm." "Oh, my God." "OK, let's stay calm." "Let's stay calm." "Breathe." "Mum!" "Are you all right?" "Is your bag packed?" "Mm-hm." "Yeah." "Remember, there's a beautiful baby at the end of it." "I'll call the hospital." "Oh, shit." "I'm not sure how much petrol I've got left." "Take my care." "OK." "Overnight bag." "Overnight bag." "All right, I'll just be a moment." "They've gone to the hospital." "Dear little Ruthie's gone to have our baby." "Ow!" "Ow!" "Ow!" "Ow!" "Ow!" "It hurts." "Patrick, it hurts." "You're doing really well, darling." "Come on." "Come on." "Darling, you're doing really well." "OK, OK." "Hello, Ruth." "Hi." "Hi." "If we just get you up on the bed, we can look at you properly." "Ruthie, on the bed, darling." "That's it." "Patrick, it hurts." "Come on, darling." "Fine." "Darling, you're doing really well." "I'm afraid we need to do an emergency C-section." "No." "No, no, no, no." "No, I'm having a natural birth." "The baby's breached and his pulse rate's too high." "Is there no other way?" "We need to get baby out now." "OK." "No, no." "I need your consent." "It's a general anaesthetic, I'm afraid." "No, no, no." "I think we should." "Come on." "Come on." "We need to be brave now." "All right." "Please, please." "All right, all right, all right." "It'll be over in a minute." "I don't want it to be over in a minute." "I want to feel it...feel it." "I wanna feel it." "It's all right." "Here, I brought you some coffee." "It's taking much longer than they said." "Oh, she'll be right as rain." "Lots of women choose to have a Caesarean, you know." "Mr. Clee?" "Here's your son." "Your wife's doing very well." "Can I...?" "Oh, it's a boy." "That's it." "Hold him close." "He won't bite." "It's a boy." "Oh, he is the image of you." "What a poppet." "May I?" "Yeah." "Come on." "Yes." "There." "Mm." "Shall I take you in to see your wife?" "She'll be coming round soon." "Yeah." "Yes, you go." "I'll look after Clee Junior here." "Here, I'd better take him, Mum." "He's beautiful." "Is he mine?" "Of course he's yours." "We don't get them mixed up, you know." "Isn't he lovely?" "Hey, what's the matter?" "I bought that suit for him?" "Yeah, we found it in your bag and we put it on after his bath." "Weren't you supposed to give him to me first?" "We thought we'd let you rest, darling." "Oh, look." "He's out for the count." "He must have got some of your anaesthetic." "Come on, young man." "Is he mine?" "Weren't you supposed to give him to me first?" "It's no good, he just won't." "Why not give him a bottle?" "No." "Just for now, Ruth." "You have to feed as soon as possible after the birth." "Everything all right?" "No, it's not." "He still won't feed." "Is it me?" "It just takes a little time." "I think this baby needs a bottle." "Have you tried using the nipple shields?" "I've tried everything." "Just for now, Ruth, then you can try again later." "No." "No, once you give a baby a bottle " "Well, he needs to eat." "All right." "All right." "All right." "There." "You have a nice rest and I'll take him outside and walk him up and down in the hall." "Aren't you lucky you've got your mum here to help?" "Hello?" "Hello?" "Ruth, I hope you didn't mind me popping in." "No, no, that's fine." "It smells delicious, thank you." "Oh, feel free to take the pictures down." "Just thought they might brighten up that rather sad corner." "Oh, no..." "Those ones of Patrick." "He's such a beautiful boy." "His whole life's there." "The one of him on the pony is priceless." "Fiona?" "Oh, I can see Patrick there as if it was yesterday." "I always say boys are like dogs and girls are like cats." "Dogs are more work, more rewarding, far more loyal." "I dunno." "Cats hide their own pooh, that's a big plus." "I have a friend who has two lovely girls." "I shouldn't say it, but I don't think she knows what mothering is." "Truly, I don't think you can, until you've had a boy." "I suppose you'd know, having one of each, I mean." "Yes." "I was 14 hours in labour with Patrick in a fly-blown, non-air-conditioned hospital in Nairobi." "But, when he came out, and I saw that he was a little boy, oh, they couldn't prise him from my arms." "Whereabouts was Fiona born?" "At home." "Finished?" "Oh, yes." "She just...came out." "No pain, no gain, as they say." "Oh?" "I thought you'd given up." "Oh, no, no, no, no." "Ooh, how's that?" "He really loves you." "Yes." "Yes." "Will you come home early, tomorrow?" "I need some sleep." "Not only am I going to come up early," "I'm going to cook, wash and dry." "You're gonna cook?" "Mm." "I'm gonna cook." "Does that mean we're having spaghetti Bolognese for tea?" "Are we complaining?" "We are not complaining." "When I was first pregnant with Thomas... ..every day, I prayed for a miscarriage." "Then you had a change of heart." "He knows." "I think he knows and that's why he prefers your mum." "Look, it..." "I know what this is about - what you're afraid of - but you're not her." "You're not your mother." "You're Ruth." "Thomas..." "Thomas is a very lucky boy." "Come here." "Thanks, Mum." "I really appreciate your help." "Are you all right?" "Oh, yeah, I'm fine." "I'll call you later." "Elizabeth?" "Elizabeth?" "Elizabeth?" "I'm not late, am I?" "Late?" "Aren't you taking him to the clinic, this afternoon?" "Oh, er, yes." "I forgot." "Oooh." "I completely forgot." "Well, I can take him, if you'd rather." "No, I'll take him." "Ruth Clee?" "Yeah, I'm coming." "Mum!" "Mum!" "Mum!" "Mum!" "Mum!" "Mum!" "Mum, wait!" "Ruth?" "Ruth!" "Ruth!" "Ruth!" "Are you all right?" "Frederick, what are you doing here?" "I was just out for a stroll." "Oh, dear, dear, dear." "Come on." "Come on." "Did you think your mother had gone off and left you?" "I saw my mother... ..at the side of the road." "I didn't think I saw her... ..I actually saw her." "But I know that's impossible." "And I know she couldn't have been there, so..." "So here I am." "And having the guts to face up to that discrepancy is commendable." "What's wrong with me?" "Have you heard of postpartum psychosis?" "Vaguely." "It's often confused with postnatal depression, but it's an unrelated disorder and a more serious one." "But, promptly treated and diagnosed, recovery is possible within a few weeks." "What are the symptoms?" "Feelings of intense confusion or agitation... ..memory lapses, or faulty recollection..." "..seeing or hearing things that others don't... ..and a basic inability to care for the baby." "Do you feel a bit distant from the baby?" "Yes." "Yes, it's like he's not mine." "It's like he doesn't want me as his mother." "But I love him." "I love him." "Any history of depression in the family?" "My mother erm..." "My mother suffered a bit from depression, yes." "I'm sorry." "No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "Ruthie!" "Mommy!" "Help!" "Mommy!" "Hello?" "David." "No, no, it's nice to hear from you." "Yeah, I'd love to see you." "I just won't be much company, that's all." "Hi." "I'm taking Thomas out." "Where?" "To a baby massage class." "What time will you be back?" "I dunno." "Maybe three." "Have you taken your pills?" "Yes." "All right." "Mind how you go." "I was so happy when I picked up the phone and it was you." "You're not gonna get all weepy on me, are you?" "I just don't have anyone to talk to, any more." "So does motherhood suit?" "I've been having some problems." "What...?" "I know it sounds crazy, but... ..everyone just picks him up and lugs him about." "My mother-in-law takes him to the shops, takes him in the car, she takes him everywhere." "And, when I pick him up, he just starts crying." "Well, he's not crying now." "Sometimes I don't think I even love him at all." "That sounds awful, doesn't it?" "No." "It does." "It does." "Well, I'm sure lots of mothers feel that way." "Really?" "Do you think they do?" "I dunno." "Probably." "I don't exactly have much experience." "I'm sure it's just a phase." "Yeah." "I'd better scoot, I've got a bloody departmental." "Bye." "Where have you been?" "I was about to phone Patrick." "We've been worried sick." "Sorry, my phone was dead." "We phoned the church hall." "There was no baby massage group today." "I took him shopping instead." "Oh." "We heard you were in a pub with a man." "With a friend." "So why lie about it?" "If you need to put your friends first, you can always leave Thomas with me." "Thank you, Elizabeth, but he's my son and I'll do whatever I want." "Ruthie!" "What's happening?" "I don't know." "What's the matter with him?" "You look at him, I don't know." "Oh, my God." "It's a burn." "It's a cigarette burn." "Well, I didn't touch him." "Somebody must have been in here." "You were smoking." "No, no, of course not." "I can smell it on your breath." "She needs help." "I'm gonna call Dr. MacFadden." "I think we need to do something a bit more decisive." "If we call in doctors and health visitors, we'll lose control." "Once you ask them in, you give them the power." "We could lose Thomas." "Oh, come on." "That's ridiculous." "Is it?" "Well, we've no experience of this sort of thing." "No-one in our family's ever been mentally ill." "The fact is that I love having Thomas." "But, unless I have sole charge, I can't guarantee his safety." "Half measures won't do." "Not until Ruth's made a full recovery." "Celia's daughter went to a marvellous man in West Sussex." "Say the word and we'll go ahead." "It has to be your decision, darling." "You have to put it to her." "It's just not our place." "Hey." "How are you feeling?" "All right." "Where's..." "Where's Thomas?" "He's here." "He's stayed here the last two nights." "I don't remember." "Do you remember me coming home?" "Do you remember the marks?" "The marks on Thomas?" "I didn't hurt him." "I couldn't." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "None of this is your fault, darling." "It's the illness, it's not you." "The only thing that matters is... ..is getting you better ASAP." "But that - that probably means you need... you need some expert and intensive help." "What do you mean?" "Ruthie, we've found a..." "We've found a clinic." "It's um..." "It's..." "It's a private clinic and it's got beautiful surroundings and erm...you know, it's good." "Is that what you want?" "No, it's..." "None of this is what I want." "Then, why?" "Why?" "Because there's just too much at stake now." "Sorry." "That's you packed." "What's happening with Thomas?" "We'll look after Thomas." "How long?" "Not long, darling." "Be brave." "The rest will do you good." "And then you can come back and start afresh." "Unless you'd rather not." "Rather not?" "Mm." "Unless you'd rather start again somewhere else." "Move away?" "If you wanted." "Perhaps go back to America." "With Patrick and Thomas." "No, no, no, Patrick and Thomas would stay here." "We wouldn't think anything less of you." "Ruth, this is Dr. Fairley." "Hello, Ruth." "DAVID:" "But you'll never be equal." "Patrick's got the career, the money, the parents on the doorstep." "There are three of them and one of you." "Change of plan." "He needs a new anorak." "That's just cruel." "What did you say?" "Ruth's yen to go back home is entirely understandable, so let her go." "No." "Now the heating's fixed, we're going to move back into the Little House." "Mad people never know they're mad." "It's textbook." "She's not suicidal." "Are you a psychiatrist?" "I wasn't mad." "Then maybe you are just bad." "Go near my son again, and I'll kill you." "It's my house and he's my boy." "Thomas?" "I always put the lid on." "Thomas!" "Just leave him alone, for God's sake." "I didn't leave them out!" "I didn't leave them out!" "One way or another, Ruth, you're going." "itfc subtitles"