"# Movin' in #" "# Makin' my connection #" "# Something's up #" "# I can feel it in the air #" "# Private eyes #" "# Never know who's watchin' #" "# Play it cool #" "# But you haven't got a prayer #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Makin' all the headlines #" "# Zoomin' via satellite #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Comin' through the grapevine #" "# Fletch is workin' overtime #" "# Bit by bit #" "# One way or another #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Running undercover tonight #" "# Have you heard the news Makin' all the headlines #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Gettin' to the bottom #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Nothing's gonna stop him #" "# Tonight ##" "My name is Erwin Fletcher." "I'm an investigative reporter for a Los Angeles paper." "You've probably read my stuff under the byline of Jane Doe." "It's better than Erwin." "Recently I've been loitering around the beach... trying to pass for a minor league junkie." "I don't nod out or drool;" "that's too obvious." "Act like you don't care and you fit right in." "Business has really picked up." "I'm still closed." "Is it a Colombian national holiday?" "What do you figure, Sam?" "No idea." " No idea at all?" " Some idea." "Like when?" "When it comes, it comes." "I got some reds." "You don't mean communists, do you?" "Is everything a joke to you, Fletch?" "Everything, Sam." " Hey, Gummy!" " Hey, Fletch." "Hey, Sam." "How's the eye?" "It's OK." "The cops did it." "They always beating up on me." " He doesn't know." " Son of a bitch!" "That's what he said." "He doesn't know?" "How come he doesn't know?" "I don't know." "He just doesn't know." "Son of a bitch!" "I wonder how he gets the stuff." "I have no idea." "Sam never leaves the beach." "He sits in that chair." "He's out of shit." "Suddenly he gets up, he's got shit." "Where's it coming from?" "The sand?" "That's highly unlikely, Grease." "I oughta get some sleep." "Grease, how old are you?" "Nineteen." "You're not taking very good care of yourself." "If you haven't guessed, there's been a lot of drug traffic on the beach." "I'm not talking about No-Doze." "I talkin' about the hard stuff." "A lot of it." "I've been trying to find out who's behind it." "It hasn't been easy." "I don't shower much." "Excuse me." "I have something I'd like to discuss with you." " What's that?" " We can't talk about it here." " Why not?" " Because we can't." "You on a scavenger hunt, or did I forget to pay my dinner check?" "Come to my house to talk." "Wrong gal, fella." "I'll give you $1,000 cash." "What?" "Come to my house and listen to the proposition." "If you reject the proposition, you keep the thousand... and your mouth shut." "Does this entail my dressing up as Little Bo Peep?" " It's nothing of a sexual nature." " Yeah." "One thousand just to listen?" "How can you pass that up, Mister..." "Nugent." "Ted Nugent." "Alan Stanwyk." "Alan, charmed." "For an extra grand, I'll let you take me out to dinner." "What a coincidence." "What?" "I almost bought this place." "Then I found out Hopalong Cassidy killed himself here." "Blew it for me." " Who?" " Hopalong Cassidy." "Bow and arrow." "Very weird." "Are you doped up?" "Don't talk to me like that." "I don't work for you." " Buenos dias." " Buenos dias." "Pup 'N' Taco." "Oh, you've remodeled the garage." "Must have cost you hundreds." "Good idea." "I oughta frame mine." "Will the Pope be in later?" "Here's my proposition." "I'm all ears." "I want you to murder me." "Here... on Thursday." "I'd like you to shoot me dead." "The reason I ask for this service... is because I'm already facing a very long... painful and most certain death." "You see, I have bone cancer." "I don't know if you know about bone cancer." "It's the worst kind you can get." "It just eats you up bit by bit." "You don't look sick." "I don't feel sick." "Not yet." "It'll get bad in a month." "After that, I'd rather not be around for it." "Why not try suicide?" "I've thought about it." "My company's taken out a large life insurance policy on me." "Suicide would nullify it, but murder does not." " Why me?" " You're a drifter." "A, uh... pardon the expression..." "a junkie." "Nobody would notice if you disappeared." "I've been watching you for a couple of weeks." "Maybe I'm just on vacation." "Not with the scum you hang out with." "No, I've watched..." "and I've thought." "It's an elegant plan." "I've even figured out your escape." "Swell." "Has it ever occurred to you I might not want to murder you?" "I've got $50,000 says you will." "50,000." "And a guarantee you won't get caught." "I'm still here." "I want it done Thursday around 8:00 p.m." "My wife will be out, and it's the staff's night off." " These will be open." " Wouldn't they normally be locked?" "Sometimes." "The staff usually forgets." "I have the same trouble with my help." "I'll be here waiting for you." "The safe will be open." "There will be $50,000 in it." "You'll be wearing rubber gloves." "Do you own rubber gloves?" "I rent 'em." "I have a lease with an option to buy." "Now in this drawer..." "Ah!" "A.357 Magnum." "My.357. You use it." "No one can trace it to you." "The room will be in disarray." "Like a burglary attempt?" "You come in and catch me stealing your ties and money?" "We scuffle." "The gun gets loose and I shoot you." "Precisely." " Are you a good shot?" " Yeah, I'm all right." "Get me on the first shot, if you can." " Do you have a passport?" " Can dig one up." "Good." "Now, after you kill me, take the Jaguar." "The keys will be in the glove compartment." " Take it where?" " L.A.X." "Pan Am will have a ticket for you." " Where am I going?" " Rio." "It departs at 11 p.m." "They serve dinner onboard?" "And a movie and drinks." "Stay down there for a year." "So?" "So..." "You certainly thought this out." "I don't leave a great deal to chance." "Those will be open?" "Take care of the gloves, the passport and the aim." "I'll handle everything else." "The gun, the money, the tickets... and the dying." "That's right." "Looks like you get the hard part." "What do you say?" "You'll be doing me a great service." "Will you kill me?" "Sure." "Hey!" "Good to see you." "Slouch, how are you?" "Can I steal you?" "If you promise not to return me." " Magic today?" " Yeah, Kareem's in the wash." "I need a favor." " Fletch!" " Did you hear something?" "See what we have on Alan Stanwyk in Beverly Hills." "I need this right away." " I take it the story's done." " W-Y-K." "Tell me I'm right." "You're right, but you're very peaked." "Want to vomit?" "Come on in." " The story's done, right?" " Uh... almost." "Almost is not an answer." "Yes is an answer." "And a damn fine answer." "Professional journalism time now." "Go back and finish the story!" "Frank, I will." "I swear it." "Something came up." "You've got a deadline tomorrow." "Did you see Sunday's ad?" "I don't read the paper." "What's the spread on tonight's game?" " Lakers by six." " Take a look." ""Shame of the City." That's very nice." "Try to follow this." "You can't run the ad and then not run the story." "You can't?" "Why not?" "Shit." "Really?" "I'm putting you on." "You'll get the story." "You'll be proud of it." "You broke it?" "You know the source?" "Practically." "Is it Fat Sam?" "You said you had pictures of him." " I do have pictures of him dealing." " Let's go." "We'll run them." "You can't do that." "Fat Sam isn't the story." "There's a source behind him." "Who?" "That's a gray area." "How gray?" "Charcoal." "May I help you with that?" "OK." "A little lighter." "Can you go higher?" "Over to the right." "Higher." "Perfect." "Nice and hard." "That's good." "Thank you." " That it?" " Perfect." "Everything's recent." "Let me see that. "Alan Stanwyk, commercial airline pilot... from Provo, Utah."" "Formerly a test pilot, member of the Jaycees." " Move on?" " Yeah." "Married Boyd Aviation." "He's no dummy." "That's big bucks." "His parents are Marvin and Velma, "were unable to attend the wedding."" "Those are three names I enjoy:" "Marvin, Velma and Provo." "Hold it there." "Cancer." ""Cancer Society Benefit."" ""Internist Dr. Joseph Dolan."" "I wonder if that's his doctor." "One way to find out." "There is." "Where do you know Alan from?" "We play tennis at the club." "California Racquet Club?" " Right." " That's my club too." "I don't remember seeing you there." "I haven't been playing because of these kidney pains." "Right." "How long have you had these pains, Mr. Barber?" "No, that's Babar." "Two B's?" "One "B." B-A-B-A-R." " That's two." " Yeah, but not together." "I thought that's what you meant." "Arnold Babar." "Aren't there children's books... about an elephant named Babar?" " I don't know." "I don't have any." " No children?" "No, elephant books." "Open wide." "Say, "Ah."" "Aah." "It's an odd name." "I haven't seen it on the club registry." "I don't formally belong." "I'm a guest of my aunt's." "Your aunt?" " Right." "Mrs. Smith." " Joan or Margaret?" "Uh-huh." "Which one?" "Margaret." "Funny old bird." "I could tell you some stories." "I bet." "You know, it's a shame about Ed." "It was." "That was really a shame." "To go so suddenly." "He was dying for years." "But the end was very sudden." "He was in intensive care for eight weeks." "But the very end, when he actually died... was extremely sudden." "Alan and I were recently speaking of dying." "He told me Boyd Aviation took out a large insurance policy on him." "You've got to be in perfect shape... to get that sort of a policy, I bet." "Drop your shorts and bend over, Mr. Babar." "No, really." "We don't need to." "We don't want to do that." "My kidneys feel better in this position." "Maybe it's that I'm not doing any calisthenics." "If I did sit-ups or bent over like this..." "I'd feel 100%/% bet..." "# Moon River ##" "Whew!" "Thank you, Doc." "You ever serve time?" " Breathe easy." " Breathe easy." "I was surprised Alan got that policy." "There's a history of cancer in the family." " There is?" " Yeah." "As a matter of fact..." "Aah!" "You using the whole fist?" "Just relax." "I saw Alan the other day." "He was looking peaked." "Are you sure he's all right?" "I can't discuss another patient." "You know that." "Well, I don't find anything wrong with you." "I'm sure it's not for a lack of looking." "12 noon." "I was anxious to return to my drug story." "But since Dr. Jellyfinger wasn't talking..." "I had to find out about Stanwyk's health." "May I help you, Dr., uh..." "Dr. Rosenpenis." "I'm here to check Stanwyk's file." "Doctor who?" "Dr. Rosenrosen." "Your name again." "It's Dr. Rosenhite." "Doctor who?" "Dr. Rosen." "Where's the records room?" " Next to Pathology." " Would you take care of these things?" "I'd like to check Alan Stanwyk's file." "Where the hell's the records room?" "Next to Pathology, B1." "Collate these for me." "Where did you say that was?" " B1." " Thank you very much." " Take the elevator." " Thank you." "Give me a hand, Doctor." "Me?" "Come on!" "Yeah." "Have you ever seen a spleen that large?" "No, not since breakfast." "Here." "Hold this." "I haven't sterilized my hands." "You won't make him any sicker." "I'll get it." "Ah, oh!" "You never get used to the smell, do ya?" "Oh, Doctor." "Are you all right?" "Where am I?" " The records room." " The records room?" " I'm fine." " Can I get you something?" "Do you have The Beatles' White Album?" "Never mind." "Get me a glass of hot fat." "And bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia." "Dr. Holmes was surprised you fainted." "He was surprised?" "I thought that body was my dead brother." "Oh!" "That spleen was the spitting image." "No, I'm fine." "Nurse, I'm hyperventilating." "Would you get me a paper bag?" " Yes, right away." " Thank you." "Here you are, Doctor." "Oh, thank you." "Can I help you?" "No." "Uh, yes, there is, actually." "One of my associates was doing a biopsy on this man." "They said he had a melanoma, carcinoma... some kind of noma." "There's no record of it here." "If he had one, it would be in here." "Wait." "Here it is." ""Surgical removal of two moles." "Tissue was benign."" "Benign?" "There's no mention of cancer?" "That's it?" "That's it." "This is one month ago." "According to this hospital, Alan Stanwyk does not have cancer." "I guess not." "He'll be so relieved." " Thank you very much." " My pleasure." "Have a nice day." "I'm not finished." " Sorry, Mr. Underhill." " Do I look finished?" "I guess not." " Now I'm finished." " Whatever you say." "You're expecting a nice gratuity, right?" "Maybe next time." "Gail Stanwyk?" "Yeah." "I haven't seen you since the wedding." "You look great." "I do?" "That's sweet of you." "I must've been plowed at your wedding." "I don't know you." "Not my wedding, your wedding." "Oh, my wedding." "Thank God." "Doesn't really help me." "Are you a friend of Alan's?" "Yes, we flew together." "I'm John." "Oh, John." "Oh, yes." "No." "John who?" "John Cocktoasttoy." "Beautiful name." "It's Scotch-Rumanian." " An odd combination." " So were my parents." "Do you mind if I practice some more?" "Go ahead." "You're a member of the club, senor?" "No." "I'm with the Underhills." "They left, senor." "He'll be back after his urinalysis." "Would you like some drinks?" "I'll put it on the Underhills' bill." "Yes." "I'll have a Bloody Mary... a steak sandwich, and a steak sandwich." "So how's Alan?" "He's been so busy lately, I hardly see him." " He's been preoccupied." " With what?" "I don't know." "Personal stuff." "Whoa!" "I hit one." "Lobs are important in tennis." "Sorry, sir." "I'll show you a couple things." "Stand here." "When the ball comes, face it like this." "Yeah." "And then pivot your body, step in with your left foot." "Just like this." "OK?" "Go ahead." "Try one." "All right." "Go ahead." "Get in position." "The ball's going to come." "Ready?" "How many are in the machine?" " A lot, I thought." " It's finished." "Good." "Much better." "I must be having an off day." "I'm usually a fabulous player." "I affect women this way." "I bet you do." "I bumped into Alan this morning." "You know what I can't figure out?" "Alan's in Utah." "I can't figure out what I was doing in Utah this morning." "I'm very flattered, but I'm also very married." "You're hitting on me, aren't you?" "How did you guess?" "I'm such a heel." "Don't know what came over me." "If I had a nickel for every one of Alan's flyboy buddies who tried to pick me up..." "I'd be rich." "You are rich." "See what I mean?" "The vice president knew I was opening the door... but the Secret Service..." "Whack!" "And blood..." "Washington." "Sugar, Mr. Poon?" "No, never, never." "Thank you." "Well, now, let me reiterate... that this is not a formal investigation." "If Alan Stanwyk isn't involved in improprieties..." "Alan Stanwyk is not involved in any improprieties." "How can the S.E.C. make such an accusation?" "You know that, and I know that... but somebody's bucking for a promotion." "It's probably that pederast Hanrahan." "If I don't go back with something... you and your son-in-law will be the scapegoats." "Unbelievable." "This is unbelievable." "They want to know why he's in Utah." "Jesus H. Christ on a Popsicle stick." "First of all..." "Alan Stanwyk does not own one single share of stock." "The $3 million for the ranch in Provo... was entirely provided by my daughter... who converted her personal, non-corporate holdings." "So, if any of your D.C. boys... want to challenge that, bring them on." "Otherwise, tell them to get out of my face." "God, I admire you." "Well... consider this case closed." "It stopped bleeding." "Isn't that something?" "My pleasure." "Thank you and good day." "By the way... what kind of a name is Poon?" "Comanche Indian." "Good-bye." "Madeline, Frieda lost the number for Alan's realtor in Provo, Utah." "Could you get me that?" " Jim Swarthout?" " Yeah." " Who are you again?" " I'm Frieda's boss." " Who's Frieda?" " My secretary." "I knew my junkie pals were awaiting my good cheer on the beach... but I needed a second wind, a beer and a wardrobe change." "As I pulled up to my imitation apartment building..." "I observed the Oldsmobuick of Mr. Arnold T. Pants, Esquire... attorney for the former Mrs. Erwin Fletcher." "Time to use the service entrance." "Refusal to pay alimony is a jailable offense, Fletch." "What about trespassing and loitering?" "I am neither loitering nor trespassing." "I've simply chosen an advisable location... to await my client's delinquent husband." "I prefer to discuss business inside." "Leave your rubbers outside." "A little one-on-one?" "He draws the foul." "You owe Wendy $918." "She doesn't need it." "She's been living with somebody for months." "I don't what you're referring to." "Wendy maintains her own residence." "This stinks." "I empathize, Fletch." "However, you threw her out." "She slept with everybody." "Prove that in court." "My lawyer was a bum." "I agree." "They slept together." "You may be right." "Are you serious?" "That's history, Fletch." "You owe us $918." "Hey!" "I think our problems may just be solved." "Ed McMahon." "I think I just won $1 million." ""Erwin M. Fletcher, you choose."" "Whoo-ee!" "I lost." "Sorry." "It's no joke, Fletch." "If some kind of payment isn't made, I'll have to garnish your wages." "I can't have my wages garnish-ied." "Tell you what." "Cash?" "I'm impressed." "I saw my pimp today." "Open your raincoat." "Come on." "Just once." "It's worth it." "That's $1,000." "Apply some towards next month." " Now scram." " Till then." "Keep 10 and get yourself a nice piece of ass." "Our guest is the most valuable player... of the National Basketball Association... from the Los Angeles Lakers... the all-time scoring champion of the N.B.A., Kareem Abdul-Jabbar." "He's coming off a game that was second to none in his brilliant career." "You must be proud." "Definitely, Chick." "It was a great effort." "But I had a lot of help, and we're just glad to be here." "How about Fletch?" "What can I say about Fletch?" "He's been fantastic." "He boxes out for us, gets the tough rebounds... and does what we need to win." "It's great working with him." "I don't know where we'd be without him." "Let's look at the play." "He's 6'5"." "With the Afro, 6'9"." "Good dribbler." "Comes in deep." "His club is behind by one point." "Fletch puts the ball through the legs." "What a great play!" "He puts it in!" "The Lakers have the lead!" "Was that some play!" "This kid from Harlem really creates excitement." "$4 million a year, but he earns every nickel." "Look how he shakes off four or five defenders with ease." "Fletch... he truly defines grace under pressure." "See if you've got anything on Stanwyk from when he lived in Utah." "Yeah." "And check out a realtor in Provo named Swarthout." "Shit!" "What's going on?" "Take off, Fletch!" "What are you doing?" "They're after Gummy again." "Slow down." "This is dumb." "Come on, man!" "He's defenseless." "Don't..." "Get up!" "What are you doing?" "Fletch!" "Let me out!" "Beat it, cop!" "Hey, you're really nuts." "You OK?" "Yeah." "I feel like $100." " They didn't do anything." " What are you talking about?" "I busted their window." "You're lucky." "It's not luck." "They didn't want me." "They wanted Gummy." "The cops and Gummy..." "Relax, Frank." "I need more time." "I could be onto something." "What?" "I don't want to spoil your surprise." "Read about it tomorrow." "What do you want?" "Don't point." "Speak!" " I need Fletch." " She needs me." "Nothing on Utah or Jim Swarthout." "I know." "Put this on the back burner." "Right here." "That's good." "You wanna give me just a little hint?" "All right, Frank." " There may be cops involved." " Did you say cops?" " Yeah." " That's one thing I found." " It's from last month." " What's this?" "More cops." "Frank, I need to go to Utah." "Utah?" "Yeah, Utah." "It's wedged in between Wyoming and Nevada." " What about finding the source?" " I have some ideas." "Say yes, Frank." "I'll buy you some new deodorant." "Go to Transportation." "Get a ticket." " My hero." " Nothing to it." "You're not recording this, are you?" "No." "Never." "Never." "Question." "Question." "Why does a man ask me to kill him... and lie about dying when he isn't dying?" "Gail Stanwyk converts $3 million of her stocks... to buy the ranch." "Why pay in cash?" "Mr. Jim Swarthout?" "I'm Igor Stravinsky." "I'm calling about some ranch property I'd like to buy." "What did you have in mind?" "Mm-hmm." "Are you a friend of Alan's?" "No, not exactly." "I overheard some people talking at the club." "$3 million sounded like a good price." "Oh, is that right?" "In that case, I have been very misinformed." "Excuse you?" "Yes." "I'd like to come out and see you anyway." "Is that all right?" "What's good for you?" "Well, I'm about to close up shop." "How about tomorrow morning?" "First thing in the morning." "Tomorrow." "Bye." "Hello!" "Anybody home?" "Hey, fella, what's your name?" "Fluff?" "Fifi?" "All right." "Bad dog." "Sit." "Stay." "I hate dogs." "Come on." "Smile." "Say, "Fletch."" "Look, defenseless babies." "Fell for the oldest trick in the book." "# Strangers in the night #" "# Exchanging clothing #" "# Strangers in my pants... ##" "Surprise!" " What the hell's..." " Police." "Spread 'em!" " Got a gun?" " Shamu's got one." "Borrow his." " What have we here?" " That's my dick." "Oh, funny boy." "What have we here?" "Looks like heroin, Gene." "You just planted that." " What'd you say?" " Wanna read me my rights?" "You have the right to remain silent." "You have the right to have your face kicked in." "Nice." "You have the right to have your balls stomped by him." "I'll waive my rights." "What's the booking, gentlemen?" "Possession of narcotics." "The chief wants to talk to him." "You'll like Chief Karlin." "He's a nice man." "I hear he's mellowed since he came out of the closet." "Take his picture while he still has a face." "That hurts." "You've been hurting." "Give him a buzz." "Come in." "Here he is, Chief." "Easy, fellas." "I'll be with you in a moment." "Did Mrs. Chief of Police help you decorate?" "So... what's your name?" "Fletch." " Full name." " Fletch." "F. Fletch." "I see." "What do you do for a living, Mr. Fletch?" "I'm a shepherd." "Officers, could you excuse us for a few moments?" "Go to the gym and pump each other." "Why are you doing this?" "I like men." "I like to be manhandled." "I like you." "For someone caught holding a bag of heroin..." " That was planted." " We're looking at maybe 10 years." "Is that what you want, Jane Doe?" "Your editor phoned me... to respond to allegations you're about to print... concerning police involvement in narcotics dealings." "Uh-uh." "I'm about to bust that beach wide open." "I don't need some penny-ante Woodward and Bernstein... to get in the way of my men." "Your men may be involved in this." "I would think that might interest you." "Idiot!" "All right." "Strictly off the record, OK?" "Yeah, OK." "I got that beach crawling with undercover cops." "But if you go nosing around, you'll make the bad guys more cautious." "Makes my job harder." "And listen, if you print your story this week... it might get some of my men killed." "I can't have that, Mr. Fletch." "You understand?" "Yeah." "I understand." "I got a deadline." "The name's Karlin with a "K"?" "You dipshit!" "Go back to that beach, you won't live to regret it!" "All right?" "Hey, you and Tommy Lasorda." " Yeah." " I hate Tommy Lasorda." "Hey!" "I'll take care of it now." "# Swing low, sweet chariot #" "I'll handle it from here." "# Comin' for to carry me home ##" "Can't keep me here." "Maybe I won't keep you." "Maybe I'll blow your brains out." "I do believe that's a violation of my rights." "After I shoot you, I stick myself with this knife... and place it in your dead hand." "Self-defense." "We don't do it anymore, but back in the old days..." "You're serious." "Ask anybody." "Can I ask anybody now?" "Can I call my mom, tell her I love her." "Uh... guess not." "I'm a newspaper reporter." "You don't blow away newspaper reporters." "Kinda stupid, isn't it?" "What will it be, Fletch?" "Hey, I hate the beach anyway." "It's not even my story." "I've got a deadline on the off-track betting... in the Himalayas." "Smaller story, but I know you've been following it." "You have things under control down there." "Your beach." "Come on out." "Come on." "May I?" "Thank you." "How could you call him?" "Fletch, I'm sorry." "You know how close to death I came?" "Yeah, it's awful." "He had a gun at my head and a knife in his hand!" "He threatened to kill me." "Hey, that's a shame." "He would've shot me." "Unbelievable." "You don't believe me." "Nope." " He thinks I'm lying." " Unbelievable." "I need an article by tomorrow." " You believe me." " Yes, I do." "I don't want unsubstantiated charges about dope-dealing cops... or paranoid fantasies about homicidal police chiefs." "Give me something I can print!" "Print this." "Me, too." "Hey, watch it." "You're on thin ice, Larry." "It was time to hang out at Boyd Aviation... to find out what Stanwyk was doing with that plane." "I splurged." "I invested 49 cents on some novelty teeth." "Hey!" " You the guy from Ajax?" " Yeah, you bet." "All right." " Thought you were bringing the eight?" " They're coming." "I'm the supervisor." "I don't carry the stuff." "Freddie's bringing them?" "Yeah." "Freddie." "You were supposed to be here an hour ago." "Traffic was murder." "A manure spreader jackknifed on the Santa Ana." "God-awful mess." "You should see my shoes." "Whew!" "Stanwyk's baby, huh?" "Yeah." "Uh-huh." "Looks well-used." "Travels to Utah every weekend." "Is that right?" "Is he a Mormon?" "I don't think he's doing a lot of singing... with the Tabernacle Choir." "These executives live high." "Know what I mean?" "I sure do." "That's a terrific wing." "I love this shape." "Do us a favor, pal." "Name's Liddy." "Gordon Liddy." "Take a look at the seventh Fetzer valve." "It's been sticking." "Probably the humidity." "That's funny." "I think it's the by-pass line." "It could be the by-pass line." "I should look at it." "Uh, Gordo?" "Back here?" "Don't tell me my business, boy!" "Just checking the luggage." "Somebody should clean these windows." "There's gook all over 'em." "Look at that." "You use a lot of fuel to go to Utah?" "I ask that, too." "Burns enough to go to South America and back." "South America and back." " Is that right?" " Yeah." "I always kid him." "I say:" ""You doing some stunt flying up there or something?"" "What's he say?" "Nothing." "He just gives me that look." "You know, he's got that look." "Yeah, he just gives him that look." "Sure." "He's the boss." "Let me look at this Fetzer." "Uh, Gord." "I know." "I'm getting a bird's-eye view." "Oh, ho ho." "It's the by-pass line, right?" "I think so." "Yeah." "Told ya." "I'll need some pliers... and a set of 30-weight ball bearings." " What?" " Yeah." "Tell ya what." "I gotta go to my truck." "If Fred gets here before I'm back, tell him to start without me." "Why do you need ball bearings?" "Come on, guys." "Maybe you need a refresher course." "Hey, it's all ball bearings nowadays." "Prepare that valve with 3-in-1 oil... and gauze pads." "And I'll need 10 quarts of antifreeze... preferably Prestone." "No, make that Quaker State." "And wash those windows." "They got muck on 'em." "Buenos dias, senor." "Hi." "Where's Mrs. Stanwyk?" "In her cabana." "I'm supposed to meet her." "Cabana six?" "Cabana one." "You would like something to eat or drink?" "Actually, I would." "Charge it to the Underhills?" "Right." "Do you have any caviar?" "Si, senor." "Beluga." "But it is $80 a portion." "I better just take two portions." "How's the Lobster Thermidor?" " I recommend it." " Good." "That'll be fine." "Bring two bottles of Dom Perignon." "Very good, senor." " Put down $30 for yourself." " Muchas gracias, senor." "Who is it?" "It's John." "John who?" "It's John." "John Levin..." "I don't remember." "John Cocktoastin?" "Hi." "Hi." "I was hoping you'd say that." "I just got out of the shower." "Yeah." "Can I borrow your towel?" "My car hit a water buffalo." "Nice place." "I'm surprised to see you." "What are you doing here?" "I ordered some lunch." "For here?" "I knew this is where my mouth would be." "I really should change." "No, you should stay the wonderful person you are today." "I mean put clothes on." "Make yourself comfortable." "Are you always this forward?" "Only with wet married women." "Get the door!" "Ah." "Very good, gentlemen." "Come right in." "Right in this way." "Right in here." "That's good." "That's very nice." "Want I set up?" "No, I'll take care of it." "Give each other $20." " Put it on Underhill." " Muchas gracias." "Sierra del fuego." "Oh, this is beautiful." "There we have it." "This goes on the Underhills' bill?" "I saved his life during the war." " You were in the war?" " No, he was." "I got him out." "Oh." "I can't believe I'm doing this." "This is great." "Let's eat." " Your bill, senor." " Oh, thank you." " $400 for lunch?" " Your guest, senor." "We didn't have any guests today." "Two bottles of Dom Perignon?" "$100 a pop!" " Jesus H. Christ!" "Where is he?" " With Ms. Stanwyk." " Where's she?" " Cabana one." "Can I ask you a question?" " Depends on the question." " More champagne?" " Yes." " Are you still in love with Alan?" "No." "I mean, no, you can't ask me that question." " Ask me another one." " Why'd you let me in?" "Um, because I'm bored." "If you're bored, why didn't you go to Utah with Alan?" "Utah's not exactly a cure for boredom." "Good point." "I've never been there." "I shouldn't say that." "What about his parents?" "He hasn't seen them for years." "I've never met them." "They don't get along?" " Mrs. Stanwyk." " Yes?" "I'm sorry to disturb you." "It's Ted Underhill." "Thanks for a great time." "I..." "Whew!" "...gotta go." "Wait a minute." "What is this?" "Someone of your acquaintance... has charged a $400 lunch to my account." "You don't know the Underhills?" "I'd like to discuss this matter with you." "I'm just out of the shower." " Wait a minute." " I have to wee-wee." "Yes, of course." " Why did you do it?" " You shouldn't have to pay the bill." "A $400 lunch tab?" "It's outrageous." "It's way over the line." "I'll cover it." "You can't go out looking like that." "He might spot you." "Hold on." "You look like you're the same size as Alan." "Put this on." " Nice suit." " Just return it." "Any other surprises?" "Yeah." "My name is not John Cocktoastin." " I wasn't at your wedding." " Who are you?" "I'm Erwin Fletcher." "I write a newspaper column under the name of Jane Doe." "So?" "So... your husband hired me to kill him." "Mrs. Stanwyk." " Mrs. Stanwyk!" " In a minute!" "Enough surprises." "What are you talking about?" "Sit down." "Your husband told me he was dying of cancer." "Is that true?" "It's not true." "That property you thought you were buying in Utah?" "Not true." "He's a bad guy." "He's involved in something very big and very bad." "Do you know Jim Swarthout?" "Yeah." "He's the man who sold us the ranch." "Wrong." "He sold you $3,000 worth of scrub brush." "I saw the deed." "You saw a forgery." "This is the real deed." "There's Swarthout's name." "If this were legible, you'd see what I meant." "This dog tried to bite me." "The motel, my car." "The Mormon Tabernacle." "Stop it." "Stop." "He's told me a lot of things." "So far, not one has been true." "I'm sorry to have to tell you these things." " Mrs. Stanwyk!" " Just wait a minute!" " I'll call my father." "He'll know." " No, you can't." "I know you don't know me, but you've gotta trust me." "Give me 24 hours." "Mrs. Stanwyk!" "You a Laker fan?" "No." " Just a minute!" " I'll take you to a game." "Mrs. Stanwyk!" "Sorry." "Thanks." "Bye." " What are you talking about?" " I'd like to take you to a Laker game." " If you need me, call the paper." " What do I do for 24 hours?" " Act natural." " I was afraid you'd say that." "Oh, Jesus." "What's he doing with the chief?" "Seeing Bone Cancer and Chief Karlin together... might lead to a page one item." "but without real evidence, Frank wouldn't print it." "I had to keep digging..." "without a shovel." "Smog Patrol." "Had your emissions checked?" " No, sir." " Fluorocarbons?" "Ozone?" " No, sir." " Well, let's check it out." "What do you say?" "Smells pretty good." "That's him." "Unit 12, in pursuit." "Catch some shuteye." "Lay back and enjoy." " Try to breathe through your nose." " Aaah!" "I use chewing gum on these rides." "It filters out the pollutants." "Aw, shit!" "You've got good grillwork." "Keep out the ozone." "I gotta get this thing up to 95, check out the fluorocarbon output." "Don't worry about the speed limit." "That's why we've got the police escort." " You a cop?" " As far as you know." "You gonna take me to jail for car theft?" " Why, did you steal the car?" " I sure did!" "I'm not even sure that's a crime anymore." "Pull over!" "Hey, look out for that truck!" "Just a game I play with my buddies." "Hide-and-seek kind of thing." "They love it." "What a day!" "Must be a stage two." "Do a little slip-streaming." "Whoa!" "There's Fred!" "Won't he be surprised!" "Don't you hear me?" "I said pull over..." "Uh-oh." "Got a license?" "Not on me." "You have one?" " No." " Pull over, buddy!" " Hey, Freddie, how's the herpes?" " Pull over!" " I did before." "I'll pull over later." " Pull over!" "That's it." "Turn your bike in!" " You're a disgrace to the force!" " Aaah!" "Get the door!" "Congratulations." "You passed the test." "Raise your left hand." "My men will be right with you." "Thelma Noble, Ellis Lee Hereford..." "Lee Weaver... and Harold Arthur." "I would like for you to meet our friends on the dais." " Hold your applause until I'm finished." " More coffee?" " Kitty Domaine, Selby Desner." " There you go." "Barbara Wattell, Walter Smith..." "Martha Sterling and Paul Fleming." "And to my right, Michael Kenyon..." "Olivia D. Williams..." "Otto Bailey..." "Bea Dorfman." "And now... the Father of Internal Bushings... our very own and beloved leader..." "A man who needs no introduction!" "Thank you very much, Sammy." "I couldn't wait." "That was a very nice introduction, and I am... very thrilled and proud to be here." "It's been a wonderful ceremony here on behalf of our own Fred..." ""The Dorf" Dorfman!" " Who is he?" " Fred was darn near death recently." "He wasn't ashamed to admit to me that he had syphilis." "Thank God he stopped it in its tracks." "It takes a lot for a man... to admit where he got it from and how he got it." "Look at him today." "Fred, you look just wonderful." "The nose looks normal again." "The face has come back into shape." "It's not drooling anymore." "And hats off to Marge, his wife, because that whole experience... the three weeks that she stayed at Trembling Hills has paid off." "No more alcohol or sedatives in her life." "There are many other things I wanna tell you about Fred... things that maybe many of you already know." "Sammy, you're not going to sing for us, are you?" "Did you know that Fred spent much of his life... honoring a profession that has gone largely unsung around here?" "Some of them are here tonight." "The profession is law enforcement." "I know Fred feels that too often our feelings are locked in... and we feel restrained and perhaps even embarrassed... to reach out and touch an officer of the law." "After all, they are people, aren't they?" "Stand up." "Pat them on the back." "Reach out." "Shake hands with any one of these men in blue." "Hug a cop!" "Yeah, go ahead." "I said it." "Yeah!" "That's a wonderful feeling!" "I'm so proud tonight!" "# Oh, say can you see #" "# By the dawn's early light #" "# What so proudly we hail #" "# At the twilight's last gleaming ##" "Hip, hip, hooray!" "Hooray!" "Hooray!" "Hooray!" "Hooray!" "Mr. Stanwyk, you are confirmed on Flight 441... to Rio de Janeiro tomorrow evening, 11 p.m., first class." "That's terrific." "Thank you." " You reconfirmed this morning." " You bet I did." "I'm a bear for detail." "I hope there's nobody sitting next to me." "I always travel first class, and I take both seats up." "I'm in bridge work." "Bridge construction." "These fold-outs take a lot of space." "There is someone next to you." "Oh, for God don don!" "Who is it?" "Mr. Singleton?" " No." "The name is Cavanaugh." " Cavanaugh?" "Ah!" "Morris or Pierre?" "Sally Ann Cavanaugh." "Sally Ann?" "Well, terrific." "In fact, you purchased the ticket for Miss Cavanaugh." "Doesn't mean I want her sitting next to me." "The flight's full." "She's connecting out of Provo." "Oh." "All right, fine." "Provo, Spain?" "Utah." "Utah." "Frank, don't give me crap about the beach story." " I'm at the airport." " The airport?" "There are two dozen cops after my ass." "I can't go home or to the office." "I'm a man without a country." "If cops are really after you, come in here." "You'll be OK." "I couldn't get through the front door." "I'm going to Utah." "You go to Utah, you stay in Utah." "I'm turning the story over to a professional reporter." "The story is Utah." "Trust me." "You're going to Utah?" "Fine." "If you're story is not on my desk by 11:30, you're fired." "Cujo?" "Who the hell are you?" "Get up!" "I'm up." " Door was unlocked." " Lock's busted." "There you have it." "I work for the landlord." "He told me to watch out for the place." " I commend him on his choice." " What?" "I commend him on his choice." "I was supposed to meet Mrs. Cavanaugh here." "Who are you?" "I'm Don Corleone, Mrs. Cavanaugh's cousin." "You know where she is?" "Moved out." "Moved out?" "Isn't that something." "I talked to her last week." "She didn't say a thing about it." " She moved out." " You're saying she moved out." " This morning." " This morning?" "God!" "Uh." "We had so much to talk about." "Mo Green is out of the Tropicana." "My sons, Mike and Fredo, are taking over." "What did you want under the bed?" "I have to pull rank on you." "I didn't want to have to do this." "I'm with the mattress police." "There are no tags on these mattresses." "I'm taking you downtown." "Give me the weapon." "I'm calling the cops." " This is for the cops." " Come on, man." "I'm her cousin." "Tell the cops." "OK." "You wanna call the cops, call the cops." "Better tie your shoelaces first." "Thanks a lot!" "Stretch, what's happening?" " Got an unbelievable story here." " Yeah?" "Great." " What can I do?" " Write this down." "Sally Ann Cavanaugh." "Sally Ann Cavanaugh." "Check every hotel in L.A. Start near the airport." "He's supposed to leave the country with her tomorrow night." "Got that, honey?" "I love your body, Larry." "Good afternoon." "Howdy." "They should recall these things." "Hit one bump and the window explodes." "You're Marvin Stanwyk?" " Yeah." " Hi there." "Harry S. Truman, Casewell Insurance underwriters." "Harry S. Truman?" "My parents were fans of the former president." "Isn't that nice." "He was a good man." " He sure was." " He showed the Japs a thing or two." " Dropped the big one, huh?" " He dropped two big ones on them." " He was a real fighter." " Yeah." "You're in insurance, Harry?" "That's right." " Well, I'm fully covered." " I don't doubt it, Mr. Stanwyk." "Actually, my company sub-insures a policy... held by Alan Stanwyk, who I believe is your son." "Yeah, he is." "Mr. Truman, meet my wife Velma." " My pleasure." " Nice to meet you." "Sit down and have a glass of lemonade." " Thank you." " Velma makes the most unusual lemonade." "It's hard to keep it cold on a day like this." "Where you from, Harry?" "I'm from California." "San Berdoo." "Yeah." "Utah is part of my route." "You folks don't mind if I ask you a couple of questions, do you?" " Shoot." " Thank you very much." "We'll start with some routine things." "You and your wife are currently alive, I take it?" " Harry, if there's..." " It's just regulations." "Now, you, Marvin, and your wife named Velma... are the parents of one Alan Stanwyk of Beverly Hills..." "Executive Vice President of Boyd Aviation." " Check." " Check." "And when did you last see Alan?" "Oh... uh... about 10 days ago." "10 days ago?" "He comes and visits about every three weeks." "Isn't that nice." "How long has he done that?" "Since he moved to L.A." "Pardon me if I seem a bit personal here." "I don't know how to put it." "We understand that there's a young lady friend in Provo... that Alan's been seeing." "What's this got to do with insurance?" "This is a comprehensive policy." "Forget about that lady friend business." "Alan is a loving husband." "He dotes on his bride." "Who?" "His wife." "You've met her?" "Of course we have." "He brings her with him." "Has Alan ever mentioned the name Sally Ann Cavanaugh?" "Has he?" "Boy, what in the hell's the matter with you?" " He has." " Of course he has." "That's his wife." "Of course." "His wife's name is Sally Ann Cavanaugh." "Cute as a button." "You wouldn't have a picture of them, would you?" "We've got lots of pictures." " Let me get you some." " Great." "Still married are they, Alan and Sally Ann?" "Yes, they are." "How long have they been married?" "It was before he moved to L.A." "Eight years April." "This gets heavier each year." "There we are." "Here it is." " That's the one." " Oh, my goodness." "She is a button, isn't she?" "Isn't she cute?" "Could I borrow this picture?" "I promise to send it back." " It's routine." "The actuarial people..." " That's all right." "We have more." " Want to see the reception?" " No, thank you." "I'm trying to quit." "How about Marvin's 65th birthday party?" " How about that, Marvin?" " They got a picture of me in here." "This is Alan?" "I can't believe this!" "It's really Alan, and it's really bigamy." " How long have they been married?" " About eight years." "Who is this woman?" "I think it's Alan's high school sweetheart." "Sally Ann something or other." "Alan's been keeping many secrets lately." "I'm calling the police." "No, Gail, don't." " I'm calling my father." " Give me one more day." "Why?" "Do you have any idea how humiliating this is?" "Yes, I do." "I really do." "Remember what I told you?" "Tomorrow night you have a club meeting." "Stay away from the house." "I'll take care of him." " Don't worry." " She looks like a hooker." "Look at her." "Could you love someone who looked like that?" "What are you talking about?" "Of course not." "5, 10 minutes tops, maybe." "It's funny." "I know." "Listen." "Why don't we relax and lie down and I'll fill you in." "This is a good time to make a pass at me." " Gum?" " Who?" "Go somewhere else." "Gum, it's me." " Fletch." "Really, is that you?" " Shut up." "Don't say my name." "Shut up." "Don't look at me." "I gotta talk to you." "All right." "About what?" "There are cops all around here." "They're after me." " You mean those surfers over there?" " Lay back down." " Don't point." "Just lay back." " OK." " Why they after you?" " I'm a newspaper reporter." "I'm nailing Chief Karlin as the major drug source on this beach." "Sit back." "Fat Sam's turning State's evidence." "What's that?" "He wrote me a nice deposition." "Said he received the drugs and you did the selling." "He said what?" "Fletch, he's lying." "I didn't sell nothing." "You gotta believe me." "I just carried the drugs from the chief to Sam." " Sure you did, Gum." " Honest, man." "That's all I did." "20 years in prison, Gum." "Unless you want to play ball." "You don't leave me much choice." " You all right?" " Yeah, I'm all right." "These robes..." "I got another question." "Where does the chief get his drugs?" "I don't know." "Have fun." "Don't bend over for the soap." "Fletch." "Fletch, OK." "It's somewhere in South America." "Mind if I sit here?" "Fletch?" "Man..." " You don't know me, Sam." " My pleasure, brother." "I'm a reporter, Sam." "I'm breaking the story on the drug traffic around here." "Gummy's turning State's evidence." "I got good proof it's the chief." "You gonna bust the chief?" "Gonna bust the chief." "I could use your help." "I'm a slave to that son of a bitch." "He busted me, third offense." "Said push for him or do 15 long." "All I get from this is free junk." " You don't have a piece of the action?" " No." "Free junk, that's it." "Hey, how you doing?" "Albert Einstein's forehead." "You like it?" "Won it in a raffle." "Fellas, stay with me." "Fletch?" "What's up?" " I'm quitting at midnight." " Who are they?" "This is Fat Sam and Gummy." "Come with me." "Their statements name Chief Karlin... as the number one drug pusher from here to Oxnard." "I want them to have Federal protection sponsored by the paper." "OK?" " This is wonderful." " I'm out, Frank." " You lost faith in me." " Fletch, I got nervous." "Forget it." "I'm writing the story." "Hold the last two paragraphs till 10:00." "You want an apology?" " You were going to can me, right?" " No, not really." " Not really?" " I was upset." "You know." "OK." "Jesus, I'm sick of this place." "Ow." "I'll try out for the Lakers." "They need a power forward." "This is a hell of a story." "Thanks." " About these guys..." " They're fine." "You don't have valuables in there, do you?" "Good evening." "I like your outfit." "Did you bring the 50 grand and the tickets?" "Of course." "Oh, oh, oh." "You forgot your rubber gloves." "You're planning on killing me, aren't you?" "You catch on real quick, Mr. Nugent." "That's a hostile thing to do." "You were gonna kill me." "I look at this as self-defense." "Now, if you would be so kind as to put your passport on my desk." "You're wearing my suit." "Where did you get that?" "Where did you get my suit, Mr. Nugent?" "The name's Fletcher." "I'm a newspaper reporter." "I write a column under the name Jane Doe." " What is this?" " Read this." " I don't have time..." " Cut the crap." "Come read this." "I'm not going anywhere." "Unless my people hear differently, that letter goes out at midnight." ""Dear Mr. Boyd:" "Alan Stanwyk murdered me tonight." "Charred remains found in the Jaguar are mine, not his." "Mr. Stanwyk, using my name and passport... boarded Pan Am Flight 306." " On arrival, he intends..."" " Pretty hefty." "Keep reading." ""...with his legal wife... the former Sally Ann Cavanaugh..."" "Don't stop, Alan." " Uh-oh." "The missus." " What are you doing here?" "I know most of it." "I want to hear the rest from you." "He doesn't read my stuff very well." "Let me take a crack at it." ""Sally Ann and Alan were married eight years ago... never divorced, making Stanwyk a bigamist, even in Utah." "Stanwyk is traveling with $3 million in cash... the result of Gail Stanwyk's conversion of Boyd Aviation stock."" "It's true, isn't it?" ""Sally Ann can confirm this... when the police pick her up at the Airport Marriott."" "Isn't that where she is?" ""By the way, Alan is a big drug smuggler." "But you can read about that in tomorrow's paper." "Sincerely, I.M. Fletcher." "P.S. Have a nice day."" "Bravo, Mr. Fletcher." "Bravo." "What tipped me was something your wife said while we were in bed together." "Oh?" "And what was that?" "She said we had roughly the same build." "From the waist up, I imagine." "Then I figured it." "You bump me off, plop me in the car... and burn me up." "What the heck, same bone structure." "You son of a bitch." "But I'm not a stupid son of a bitch." "I was prepared to commit one murder, assface." "What makes you think I won't commit two?" " Whoops." " What do you mean, "Whoops"?" "By the time your story's published, I'll be on the beach." "I understand extradition from South America's complicated." "For two murders, it's even more so." "That thing loaded?" "If you shoot me... you're liable to lose those humanitarian awards." "Tough shit, Hopalong." "Greetings, everyone." "Thank God, the police." "What are you doing here?" "Put the gun down." "I can take care of them." "Thought you had this figured out." "Nice going, Erwin." "Don't ever call me Erwin." "Fat Sam and Gummy left the beach today." "It occurred to me that maybe there are things happening I should be aware of." "I'll take care of this." "It doesn't involve you." "Go home." " I'll call you tomorrow." " What?" "Long distance?" "Overheard you say something about South American extradition." "Are you taking that $800,000 I staked you with on the next load?" "You two have a lot to talk over." "We'll just catch the last ten minutes of "Dynasty."" "Jerry, you're gonna have to trust me!" "I got a way to get rid of this asshole, and you're jeopardizing everything!" "Your way is gonna land my butt on the front page... while you're basking in the sun!" "With your money." "The second one's going to be more fun." "Go ahead, make my day." "Thanks." "No, this is getting absurd." ""One Bob Haldeman wig, a gorilla suit."" " A gibbon suit." " "Tennis shorts." "leather sneakers, wrist bands."" " It's business." "I hate tennis." " What's novelty teeth?" "Frank, it's all business." ""A nun's habit." "Six tubes of Crazy Glue."" "That's personal." " Take it out of my raise." " You're not getting a raise." "Come on." "I would think the D.A. would need these tickets for evidence." "Not necessarily." " Not necessarily?" " Larry!" "In the court ruling "U.S. vs. Fishbein"... a man subjected to potential incineration... while wearing another man's suit... is entitled to $10,000 worth of airline tickets." "It's an obscure ruling but very important one to me." "Why don't you say that you want to take me to Rio with you?" "There's a different slant." "The thing is, we haven't really dated formally." "I take first dates to Laker games." "I don't want to go to a Laker game." "I don't like basketball." "Maybe that's because you don't understand basketball." "You haven't learned the fundamentals." "The pick and roll." "Sounds like a fast-food chain." " Reverse stuff." " That I've done." "I'll bet you have, you little vixen." "The coroner had certified Stanwyk dead... or extremely sleepy." "And Chief Karlin was facing 20 years in the fun house." "I decided to accompany Gail to Rio... and personally assist her in her grief therapy." "On the beach, I explained basketball to her, but she didn't grasp it." " Fletch?" " Call me Erwin." "Why do they bounce the ball the whole time?" "Doesn't it seem a little childish?" "Well, it may seem that, but that's called dribbling." " "Dribbling"?" " If they stop bouncing the ball... they get called for traveling." "Traveling." "Aha." "That's what they call it when you don't bounce the ball." "When it came to basketball, Gail was a loss." "But we had our own version of one-on-one... and she thought I was the bravest man in the world, which I am." "By the way, I charged the vacation to Mr. Underhill's American Express card." "Want the number?" "# Bit by bit #" "# One way or another #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Running undercover #" "# Tonight #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Gettin' to the bottom #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Nothing's gonna stop him #" "# Tonight #" "# Movin' in #" "# Makin' my connection #" "# Something's up #" "# I can feel it in the air #" "# Private eyes #" "# Never know who's watchin' #" "# Play it cool #" "# 'Cause you haven't got a prayer #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Makin' all the headlines #" "# Zoomin' via satellite #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Comin' through the grapevine #" "# Fletch is workin' overtime #" "# Bit by bit #" "# One way or another #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Running undercover #" "# Tonight #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Gettin' to the bottom #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Nothing's gonna stop him #" "# Tonight #" "# Diggin' in #" "# Gonna break by mornin' #" "# Comin' out #" "# Read it in the Times #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Makin' all the headlines #" "# Zoomin' via satellite #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Comin' through the grapevine #" "# Fletch is workin' overtime #" "# Bit by bit #" "# One way or another #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Runnin' undercover #" "# Tonight #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Gettin' to the bottom #" "# Bit by bit #" "# Nothing's gonna stop him #" "# Tonight #" "# Tonight #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Makin' all the headlines #" "# Zoomin' via satellite #" "# Have you heard the news #" "# Comin' through the grapevine #" "# Fletch is workin' overtime #" "# Bit by bit ##"