"Oh!" "Whoa, careful." "[ whirring stops ] âª We are family âª âª We are -- are âª âª And now we're gonna do our own thing âª âª I'm not the kinda girl to sit home and wait âª" "âª For the phone to ring, waiting on some date âª âª Love changes with the weather, out like the tide âª âª Sometimes I just might change my mind âª" "âª It's Billy on Monday, Tuesday it's Jack âª âª Forget about Bobby, I don't want him back âª âª And before I'm gonna give my heart again âª" "âª I'd rather be with my friends âª âª We are family âª âª Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, now âª" "All yours." "âª Hey!" "âª âª Uh-huh âª âª What I like about you âª âª You really know how to dance âª âª When you go up, down, jump around âª" "âª Talk about true romance âª âª Yeah âª âª Keep on whispering in my ear âª âª Tell me all the things that I wanna hear âª" "âª 'Cause it's true âª âª That's what I like about you âª âª That's what I like about you âª âª That's what I like about you âª" "âª Hey!" "âª" "Where is my sweater?" "Holly, have you seen my blue sweater?" "It was in my closet in the blue-sweater section." "It's a baby-blue, long-sleeve, mock turtleneck with pockets in the front." "Hi!" "Once again, thank you for letting me live here." "I am so psyched I didn't have to move to Japan with Dad." "Once again, you're welcome." "Are you gonna hug me like this every morning?" "No, sometimes I'm gonna hug you like this!" "[ sighs ]" "Um, pink poodles." "Is that from the Barbie junior-executive collection?" "Actually, I was gonna wear something else, but I went in my closet and " "Hated everything in it?" "Same with me." "And then I remembered I have a new roommate with excellent taste." "Bet you didn't know you had this little number in there, did you?" "Actually, I -- excellent taste?" "You think I have excellent taste?" "Please." "Your closet could kick any other closet's butt." "If closets had butts and stuff." "Hey." "Hey." "You coming by the restaurant today after school?" "[ muffled ] Hot Pop-tart." "Hop hop hop." "Am I down with the kids or what?" "What are you doing here?" "Nothing." "I just came by." "I was wondering if you had a couple minutes -- maybe talk, chat it up..." "et cetera." "Ahh...et cetera." "Oh, no, no, no." "It's just we haven't had much time alone lately to talk or chat or..." "Et cetera." "I like your shirt." "It's so sexy." "You think pink poodles are sexy?" "It's been a very long time." "I know, baby." "For me too." "But it's just been really hard to find time with Holly here, and I still feel sort of weird with you spending the night and her living here." "Oh, no problem." "I totally understand." "You know, when you think about it, we're basically alone right now." "When you think about it, we basically are." "[ door opens ]" "What is with this city?" "Doesn't anyone watch where they're going?" " No." " No." "Sorry about your sweater." "I'll work on that stain when I get home." "Bye, guys." "See ya." "[ door opens, closes ]" "Hey, look -- we're alone again." "Yeah." "Just me, you, and some very sexy poodles." "You want to put a little club soda on that stain?" "Oh, God, you are so sweet." "Holly?" "Holly?" "[ chuckles ]" "Oh!" " Hey, welcome home!" " Hey, welcome home!" "What are you guys doing in my room?" "Watching "The Matrix" on DVD." "Why?" "Widescreen format." "Director's commentary." "No." "Why are you watching it in my room?" "My player's broken." "So I said it'd be cool if we watched it in here." "Oh." "Okay." "See, this is what I'm talking about." "How great is my sister?" "I mean, is she not the best?" "She better be the best, because if there's anybody better, that's just too much good." "What?" "Let it go." "Let it go." "Let it go." "We can start it over again if you want to watch it with us." "Yeah." "Please." "[ laughs ]" "Join us." "No, I don't think so." "I'm just gonna go in the living room and read on the couch, my second-favorite lying-down place." "She seem a little tense to you?" "Oh, she always gets flustered around me." "Oh, somebody's having a birthday?" "Yeah, looks like." "Want us to help sing?" "Oh, no." "We don't really do that here." "Well, that doesn't seem very friendly." "What kind of restaurant doesn't sing "Happy Birthday"?" "My restaurant, my rules." "I thought your dad owned this place." "Uh-huh." "He owns it, I manage it." "And you can't manage to sing "Happy Birthday"?" "I can manage to cut off your free cheesecake." ""Happy Birthday" is a stupid song." "Hey, guys." " Hey." " Hi." "Hi, honey." "Hi, Gary." "Hello, Val." "Nice to see you." "Uh, you have milk right here." "I know." "Gary and I are gonna go to the used-CD store." "You want to come?" "No, I think I'll hang out here for a minute." "Okay." "See you back at the apartment." "All right." "Hey, can you stick around for a while?" "Sure." "It's not like I'm in a hurry to get home or anything." "Uh-oh." "You guys aren't fighting, are you?" "I know how sisters can be." "You have two brothers." "But I have seen "Ya-Ya Sisterhood."" "That's about a mother and a daughter." "Weren't you paying attention at all?" "Yeah." "Oh, please don't make me watch it again." "We're not fighting." "It's just living with a 16-year-old is a little more problematic than I had expected." "Have you said anything to her?" "No." "I can't." "She's so grateful." "It's hard to yell at somebody for using all the hot water when they're constantly thanking you for saving their life." "Could be worse." "You could still be living with Roberta." "True." "At least Holly doesn't have dandruff on her arms." "The thing is I was kind of looking forward to having the apartment all to myself, you know?" "You're not sorry Holly moved in, are you?" "Oh, God, no, no." "No, I'm glad she's here." "It's just... [ sighs ]" "I thought it would be kind of fun to, I don't know, clean the hair out of the drain and know that it's all mine." "Uh...not that it matters, but how much hair are you losing?" "Just give it some time." "It's like Sandra Bullock said in "Ya-Ya Sisterhood" " ""I'll learn what you like, and you'll learn what I like, and everything will be fine."" "Sandra Bullock never said that." "Yeah, she did." "Maybe you weren't paying attention." "When?" "In the scene in the middle where -- where... oh, please don't make me watch it again." "[ telephone ringing ]" "[ ringing continues ]" "I got it." "Hello?" "Oh, my God." "Who is it?" "What's the matter?" "Are you serious?" "Where?" "How serious is it?" "Nana?" "Which hospital?" "Nana's in the hospital?" "Which hospital?" "St. Luke's?" "St. Luke's." "Okay, you go get dressed." "I'm gonna go down and get us a cab." "Where are my keys?" "Holly, have you seen my keys?" "Where are you going?" "To the hospital to see Nana." "Nana's in the hospital?" "Isn't that -- didn't you just " "Who are you talking to?" "My friend Liz." "She was at the hospital today." "She thought she saw Gwen Stefani, and she went up to her, and it totally wasn't her." "You are so lame." "[ laughs ]" "Gotta go." "So you scared me half to death because your friend saw not Gwen Stefani?" "That's a reason to wake me up at 1:00 in the morning?" "She looked a lot like Gwen Stefani." "My heart is racing." "I am never gonna be able to get back to sleep now." "I'm sorry." "I guess I just wasn't thinking about " "About me?" "No, you haven't been." "We really have to do something about these living arrangements, because this -- it just isn't working out." "It's not?" "No, it is not." "And to tell you the truth, I am not very happy right now." "And you are never to tell anyone you saw me in these glasses." "Val..." "I'm so sorry about last night." "You're right." "I've been so incredibly thoughtless, and I just want to make it up to you." "Great." "I have just the thing." "It's called the good roommate chart, or, as I like to call it, the G.R.C." "Everything you need to know about being a good roommate is right here." "You know what?" "This is exactly the kind of structure that I need." "How does it work?" "Okay, say you want to go into my room and borrow my DVD player, but you don't know if it's okay." "You look under "privacy issues,"" "cross-reference "borders and boundaries,"" "subheading "bedroom," and right there's your answer." ""A good roommate never enters another roommate's bedroom without permission."" "Kind of fun, huh?" "The best kind of fun, 'cause you learn something, too." "Hey." " Hi." " What are you doing here?" "Holly hasn't left for school yet, huh?" "It's Saturday." "It isn't 2006 either, is it?" "Stupid Palm Pirate." "Isn't it called Palm Pilot?" "Not if you buy it off a guy in a van." "Same guy who sold you the Rulex?" "So what are you so dressed up for?" "Oh, I'm meeting a client for breakfast." " Ooh." " I'm sorry, baby." "Were you hoping for some alone time?" "No, no." "I just came by to see your pretty face." "I had no expectations." "Oh!" "Ow!" "What is this?" "Barry White, "The Love Album"?" "Okay, I may have had some expectations." "I promise, promise, promise we will find time alone, but I got to go right now, okay?" "See you later, Bug." "Bye." "Bye." "Hey, what's that?" "It's the good roommate chart, the G.R.C." "Oh, yeah." "She gave me the G.B.C., good boyfriend chart." "It was issued to me right after a very unfortunate pull-my-finger incident." "I heard." "Hey." "You ready?" "Movie starts in a half an hour." "Hang on." "Let me put these dishes away." ""A good roommate cleans and puts away dishes within 20 minutes of use."" "Oh, so that's the G.R.C., huh?" "Definitely for girl roommates." "The guys would be like," ""Could you at least keep your pizza in your bed?"" "All right, I'm ready." "Let's go." "Oh, I need my "Matrix" DVD." "No!" "Wait!" "What?" "Girl, calm down, okay?" "!" "I'll get you one for your birthday!" "No, you can't go into Val's room." ""A good roommate never goes into another roommate's bedroom without permission."" "It'll only take two seconds." "Forget it." "This thing is my Bible, okay?" "You're kidding me, right?" "No, and neither was Val when she said, "I'm not happy."" "And if she's not happy, then I'm on my way to live with my dad in Japan." "I have got to get that movie." "It's really important." "Why?" "I told Patricia Franks that I'd give it to her when I saw her tonight, and maybe I can even weasel my way into watching it with her, if you know what I mean." "Do you know what you mean?" "No." "All right, you have two seconds to get in there and get out." "Be right back." "Fast!" "Holly, it's not in the box." "Look in the machine." "Hurry up!" "It's stuck." "What?" "I can't get it out." "Gary, come on." "Move." "[ grunting ]" "Aah!" "Oh!" "Oh, no!" "Oh, no!" "No, no, ." "It's okay." "See, it slides back in." "She'll never know we were in here." "The stuffed animals." "We'll throw 'em a tea party later and make it up to 'em." "She puts them in exact order." "Then she'll know we've been in here." "Calm down, calm down." "Okay, uh, uh, we'll figure out where they go." "Luckily, I've got a photographic memory." "Got it?" "Maybe I was thinking of peripheral vision." " Hey." " Hey, hon." "How's it going?" "There's two conventions in the hotel down the street, the kitchen's backed up, and we're all out of garnish." "Wow, it's too bad you're so busy." "Holly's going to the movies, and I'm gonna be home all alone... et cetera." "Ronnie, I'm going out for garnish." "No!" "Val would never put Mr. Noodles next to Pooh." "Well, what do I know?" "I'm the moron who thought that sneezer beagle would get along with cookie bunny." "It sounds weird, but she's done it ever since she was, like, 5." "She had a dream where all her stuffed animals came to life and played with each other when she wasn't around." "So she puts them in, like, playgroups?" "Yeah." "In case they do come to life?" "I'd rather not talk about this." "Ooh!" "[ giggles ]" "Val!" "Closet!" "Gary!" "Are you sure it's okay if you leave the restaurant?" "I've got an assistant manager." "Let him assist." "Hey, there's something different about this room." "Oh, yeah." "I'm in it." "Piña colada." "[ Jamaican accent ] I like it, man." "[ normal voice ] Hello." "Hello." "Mmm." "Hold on." "[ "Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Babe" plays ]" "I've heard people say..." "[ Jamaican accent ] I like it, man." "Come here." "[ normal voice ] Whoo!" "I don't know about that." "So, what was the very first thing that attracted you to me?" "The very first thing?" "We've shared love." "You want me to be totally honest?" "Yes." "Your teeth." "Hey, what's sneezer beagle doing on the top shelf?" "Tim turtle, Pooh..." "Everybody's all moved around." "Maybe they come to life when you're not here." "Kidding." "[ laughs ] I know." "âª Can't get enough of your love, babe âª âª Oh, some things I can't get used to âª [ springs creaking ]" "Ohhh!" "Oh!" "Holly, what?" "!" "It's all my fault!" "Aah!" "Oh, uh, I can explain." "I..." "I can explain." "It's all my fault." "Stop moving!" "Thank you." "Now, is there anyone else in my room I should know about?" "I believe I hear Barry White." "You, off my bed!" "Oh!" "Sorry." "âª Ain't no use âª" "Jeff, would you excuse us, please?" "I would like to talk to my sister." "Sure." "âª I hunger âª âª For your love âª" "Oh, I feel so bad." "This is all my fault." "What were you guys doing in there, man?" "I just went in to get my movie." "You like this movie?" "I love that movie." "I'm, like, obsessed with it." "It's one of those movies where I'm like," ""Man, I would love to be one of those characters."" "You want to be one of the "Ya-Ya" sisters?" "What?" "No, no, no." "I went in there to get "The Matrix," man." "This must be Val's." " You want free cheesecake for a year?" " Sure." "Make it disappear." "Aren't you gonna say something?" "Why don't you start?" "Okay." "Val, I feel terrible " "Okay, my turn." "You want to know how I feel?" "I feel, um, embarrassed." "I feel disappointed, hurt, angry." "And I have to tell you," "I feel a little taken advantage of here." "I never meant to do that." "I mean, I knew we would have to make adjustments, both of us, but it really seems like your adjustments are a whole lot more fun than my adjustments." "I'm sorry." "Me too." "I'm sorry, too." "I think the best thing would be for you to just " "I know." "You don't even have to say it." "I'll call Dad and tell him it's not working out." "What are you talking about?" "You want me to move out." "Isn't that what you were going to say?" "No, I was gonna tell you to have Gary go to the movies without you." "You want to move out?" "No." "I mean, I love living here, but...yesterday you said you weren't happy, and I'm assuming that destroying your bed and collapsing on your boyfriend wasn't exactly a mood lifter." "Listen... when I asked you to move in here," "I wasn't doing you a favor because you're my sister." "I want you here, and not just on a trial basis." "It's for as long as you want to stay, okay?" "Okay." "And from now on," "I'll follow the G.R.C. to every colorful letter." "Listen, maybe the chart system isn't for everyone, although it does work for Jeff, but he's special." "Why don't from now on, when things come up, we just talk about 'em?" "Okay." "That sounds good." "Wanna talk?" "âª It's us against the world âª" "[ Play's "Us Against the World" plays ]" "Fire in the hole." "[ blow-dryer whirring ]" "[ whirring stops ] âª I wonder if we are meant to be âª" " Ahh!" " Ahh!" "âª Don't start to like him too much âª âª Too so-o-o-o-o-o-o-on âª âª There is no one else that I can say this to âª âª And there is nothing better than to talk to you âª" "âª If you have a problem, I'll be here for you âª âª 'Cause, girl, you always know that âª âª It's us against the world âª" "We'll get it." "[ clanking ]"