"[Alison] Previously on The Affair..." "This is it." "Bunch of stuff came this week." "Mom said pile it here." "[children shouting]" "Joanie!" "Hey!" "Oh!" "[Alison] Can I talk to you?" "Six months." "No explanation." "No warning." "I have a lot to explain, and I will." "Or I'll try to." "I just need to see Joanie." "No." "Absolutely not." "I'm better now, and I'm back, and I'm not gonna leave her again." "[Linda] That's what you got." "One, two times a week." "I've tried to be patient with you, and then you just fucking disappear." "There's something deeply wrong with you." "She's my daughter." "You..." "you can't keep her from me." " We can, actually." " I wasn't well." "You don't understand." "I-I could..." "Nobody forced you to sign anything." "[gasps] Oh, sweetheart." "Oh!" " Thank you." " I'm not doing this for you." "I'm doing it for her." "♪ I was screaming into the canyon ♪" "♪ At the moment of my death ♪" "♪ The echo I created ♪" "♪ Outlasted my last breath ♪" "♪ My voice it made an avalanche ♪" "♪ And buried a man I never knew ♪" "♪ And when he died his widowed bride ♪" "♪ Met your daddy and they made you ♪" "♪ I have only one thing to do and that's ♪" "♪ Be the wave that I am and then ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "♪ I have only one thing to do and that's ♪" "♪ Be the wave that I am and then ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "♪ I have only one thing to do and that's ♪" "♪ Be the wave that I am and then ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "♪ Sink back into the o ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "♪ Sink back into the o ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪" "[♪♪]" "_" "[♪ soft dramatic music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "[Cole exhales]" "[Alison exhales]" "[heavy breathing]" "[Joanie] Daddy?" "[heavy breathing]" "[Joanie] Daddy?" "Can I watch a show?" "Baby, it's a school day." "[Joanie] But I want to." "Come here." "Come here." "I need to look at you." "Come here." "Come here." "Come here." "Come here." "[chuckles]" "Let me look at you." "Hmm." "[laughs] Hmm." "Mm-hmm." "It happened again." "What happened?" "You got even more adorable." "[kisses and grunts]" "Mmm." " Good morning." " Good morning." " [grunts]" " Come here." " [Joanie whines]" " Oh, please come here." "[yawns]" "Please come here." "Come here." "Oh, yes." "Yes." "Okay, come on." "Come on." "Da-ding da-ding da-ding da-ding!" "Oy!" "I got to pick up the balloons, buy a new camera battery, make the gift bags..." "I got the kids all personalized sunglasses with their names on the sides." "Pink for the girls, green for the boys." "Hey, um, did you confirm the entertainment?" "Already done." "She's gonna love it." "Who's picking her up from school?" "Um, I can." "I mean, either way." "She's seeing her mom today after school, so..." "I have a meeting at 3:00, but I could try and change it." "No." "It's okay." "I can take her." "You sure?" "Oh!" "Cole, I..." "I forgot I need to pick up the cake." "Mommy's making me a cake." "Is that right?" "Mm-hmm." "Did you know about that?" "How would I know about that?" "Can we cancel the one you ordered?" "No!" "We've already paid, and it was really expensive." "Well, we can eat the cost." "That's fine." "I can't believe she's coming." "Well, we did invite her." "I didn't think she'd show up." "She's Joanie's mother." "It's just so awkward." "Joanie wants her there." "It'll be fine." "You have gone above and beyond on this party, and Joanie is gonna have the best time." "So just try to enjoy it, okay?" "Yeah." "[Caleb] Come on." "Mom did not say that." "[Hal] Yes, she did, man." "I'm telling you." "[Caleb] She's going crazy in her old age." "I think she's just mad because you didn't name the baby after Scotty." " Mary Kate wasn't really..." " No, no, no." "I get it." "I get it." "Bad voodoo, right?" " Yeah." " She's into all that stuff." "[Hal] Bro, she's into all that stuff." "[chuckles]" "[Caleb] Bro, I think you're a gentleman." "[indistinct chatter] [laughter]" "Keep working." "Yes, captain." "One... wait a minute." "[indistinct chatter] [truck door opens and closes]" "Ordered the ipe for the deck." "They said two weeks." "Excellent." "Thank you." "Hey, I was looking in the southeast corner on the second floor... it's out of plumb." "I'll take a look." "But I really wish you'd let me bring in some more experienced builders." "Ah, don't worry." "I'm not letting those guys do the tough stuff." "But you should bring in some framers." "I want to get the whole place re-measured." "Got to get that roof on before winter." "Yes, sir." "[phone ringing]" "Hey, honey." "What's going on?" "Ah, shit." "Really?" "Call Caroline too?" "No, no." "You stay there for the shift." "I can pick her up." "Yeah, it..." "Luisa, it's no problem." "I can move the meeting." "I'll do it." "[laughing] Hey, sweetie, come here!" "Ahh!" "Oh-ooh!" "[laughing] [kissing] Hey, sweetie." " Hey." " Hey." "How's it going?" "Good." "I thought Luisa was dropping her off today." "She got stuck at work." "We're short a hostess, so... [sighs] Well, it's good to see you." "It's good to see you too." "Okay, do you want to go to the playground today?" " [Joanie] Yeah." " Yeah, okay, let's go." "Hello, Joanie." "Mama, does she have to come?" "[sighs] Yes, baby, she does." "What about me?" "Can I come too?" "Yay!" "Daddy's coming!" "Is that all right?" "Yeah." "Of course." "Is that okay with you?" "If Joanie's happy, I'm happy, Mr. Lockhart." "Great." "All right, kiddo, let's get you in the car." "Actually, this is technically Alison's visitation time, so I'd prefer she rode with Alison." "Right." "Yeah, of course." "I'll see you there." "Yeah." "Okay." "Should we race to the car?" "[♪ soft dramatic music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "[Alison] Okay, so, what should we do next?" " Monkey bars." " The monkey bars." " [Alison] You sure?" " [Joanie] I'm sure." "[Alison] Yeah, let's do the swing." "No." "Let's do the swing, Joanie." "Okay, let's go, let's go, let's go!" "[both laughing]" "Here." "[giggles]" "[♪♪]" "Hey." "[♪♪]" "Okay, that's high enough now." " Mom, why?" " Joanie." " [Joanie giggling] - [Alison] Joanie." "[Joanie giggling]" "Joanie, come down now." "Joanie." "Don't." "Joanie, Joanie, please." "Here." " Come here." " [Joanie giggling]" "Now." "Don't do that, okay?" "Okay?" "That's too high." "Look at me." "Okay?" "[Alison sighs] Good girl." "[Alison] All right. [kissing] Okay." " Where should we go now?" " Swings." "Swings." "Swings." "Go, go, go, go!" "Swings." "[♪ gentle music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "How was the rest of your day?" "It was good." "Roof joints are ready to go on." "I'm gonna have Sal put on a couple more guys, try to pick up the pace a little bit." "That's good." "How is Alison?" "They're good together." "What does that mean?" "Nothing." "I just haven't had a whole lot of opportunity to see them together since she got back." "What's good about it?" "They seem comfortable." "When is the next court date?" "Why?" "No reason." "Just asking." "Two weeks." "And that's the one to grant unsupervised visits?" "No." "We're not granting her anything." "It's for the court to decide." "I'm just saying Alison seems better." "She seemed fine before, until she abandoned her daughter and checked herself into an institution." " I just don't trust her." " Okay." "I'm sorry." "I don't think I ever will." "I get it, Luisa." "[upbeat music playing] [indistinct chatter]" "[♪♪]" "Nice shindig." "Hey-hey!" " Hey, man." " Look at you, huh?" "Ha!" "Wow." "I don't want to wake him up." "Oh, you won't." "He sleeps through anything." "Jenny burned toast the other day, set the fire alarm off." "Yeah, he didn't move." "Yeah, he is pretty damn cute though, huh?" "Where's Jenny?" "Oh, she's mingling." "She's a mingler." "I thought you were the mingler." "We take turns." " How's the house coming?" " Good." " Yeah?" " Good." "We should be in by April." "[sighs] Unreal." "What's that?" "You!" "You're all grown up." "All settled." "Luisa's been good for you, man." "I don't think I've ever seen you this happy." "I'm a lucky man." "[♪♪]" "Hey, Mary Kate?" "Will you do me a favor?" " Yeah." " Take some pictures?" " Sure." " Thank you." "[♪♪]" "[Joanie] Mommy!" "Oh, hi, sweetie!" "Hey!" "[kisses]" "Hey." " [Alison] Hey." " Welcome." "Wow, you guys went all out." "A pony." "[Joanie] I love ponies." "That's 'cause you come from a family of ranchers." "On one side, anyway." "Let me take that." "Oh." "Thank you." "Joanie, you want to show your mom all your presents?" "Okay." "It was a misunderstanding." "No, no, it's fine." "[all] ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪" "♪ Happy birthday to you ♪" "♪ Happy birthday dear Joanie ♪ [mouths words silently] [all] ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪" "[Luisa] Cole." "Get a picture." "[all cheering]" "Yahoo!" "Keep going, girl." "Yay!" " Whoo!" " Yes!" "[upbeat music playing]" "[♪♪]" "Hey, sweetie." "Hi." "Good girl." "Hey." " [all gasp] - [Cole] Ooh-ooh-ooh." " Oh, no." "Wait." "Joanie!" " [Joanie crying]" " [Cole] Wait, wait." " [Alison] Joanie!" "Hey." " What are you doing?" " Let her do it." "[Joanie crying]" "[♪ soft dramatic music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "That's it. [gasps]" "[Alison] Oh, come here." "Hey, kiddo." "You okay?" "Yeah, she's fine." " Any broken bones?" " We don't think so." "Good." "You ready to get back on the horse?" "Yes, you are." "That's what we do when we fall off horses." "We get right back on." "Right, Mom?" "[sighs and pats Joanie's leg] That's right." "Come on." "It's gonna be fun." "You're a tough girl." "You're gonna be fine." "I'll go with you this time, okay?" "[horse chuffs] [partygoers applaud and cheer]" "[mouths words silently]" "Luisa?" "You want to talk about what just happened?" "Where you going with that?" "[door opens and slams shut]" " [sighs] - [Jenny] Great party." " Thank you." " [Cole] Good seeing you." "[Oscar] Yeah, good to see you." " Hope you had fun." " I didn't." "He loved it." " Bye." " [chuckles]" " Good to see you." " Hey." "The four of us?" "Dinner?" "Soon?" "Absolutely." "I'll set it up." " All right, yup." " Bye." " Safe drive." " Okay." "Bye." "Look, I'm sorry." "I just reacted." "Mm-hmm." "I mean, the whole thing happened so fast." "Could you stop cleaning for a second and just talk to me?" "What do you want me to say?" "I can't stand feeling like this." " Like?" " Like I've done everything I can, everything that's been asked of me, and still..." "And still what?" "This town is not my home." "Joanie is not my child, but I've tried." "I love that little girl." "Now Alison gets to show up again after running away, and just takes everything back, including you." "That's not what she's doing." "That's what she's trying to do!" "You can't see it because you're so blind to her." "You see her as this fragile thing." "It's such bullshit." "I know this whole situation has been incredibly challenging, and you have been amazing." "But I'm yours, okay?" "Look, we're building a home together, a life." "And I'm just trying to do right by everybody." "By you, by Joanie, and, yes, by her." "I mean, I know she's made some mistakes..." "Some mistakes?" "Cole, she abandoned her daughter on our doorstep." " She is still Joanie's mother." " She doesn't deserve to be!" "Well, what do you want me to do?" "You want me to have her locked up?" "For depression?" "For being afraid?" "We lost our child!" "[♪ soft dramatic music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "I know." "How am I ever gonna compete with that?" "It is not a competition." "Of course it is." "It's not." "You are my wife." "[sighs]" "I don't even know why we're having this conversation." "[knocking at door] [sniffles]" " [man] Cole Lockhart?" " Yeah?" "I'm Detective Stanton of the Livingston, New Jersey, Police." "This is my partner, Detective Romero, and Officer Gibbons of East Hampton." "Hey, Mr. Lockhart." "So, what's this about?" "Uh, have you heard the news about Noah Solloway?" "He was attacked." "Attacked?" "Stabbed." "Look, would you mind telling us where you were last Wednesday night?" "Oh, get the fuck out of here." "[Stanton] It's just a question." "I didn't even know that piece of shit was out of prison." "Mr. Lockhart, we're just kicking all the tires here." "Between your ex-wife and your brother, this is one alibi we need to have." "He was home with me." "Good evening, ma'am." "And you are?" "I'm his wife." "Okay." "[Stanton] Well, I guess that's all we needed to know." "Thank you, folks." "Have a nice night." "Hey." "Is he alive?" "He is." "Too bad." "[♪♪]" "Where were you really?" "[knocks on door]" " [knocks again] - [door opens]" " Hey." " You could've warned me." " About what?" " The cops, Alison." "The ones asking me if I tried to murder your husband." "They came here too." "I'm..." "I-I'm sorry." "I-I didn't know they would go to you." "Well, they did." "They were looking for an alibi." "Do you have one?" "I was fucking home on Wednesday." "Okay." "Sorry." "When were you gonna tell me he's out of prison?" "I I, uh, I didn't think you'd be interested and..." "Really?" "You didn't think I'd be interested that the man who killed my brother is free to start his new life wherever he wants, whenever he wants?" "He's a fucking free man, and we're stuck here in this shit!" "You tell him that if he ever so much as sets foot in this town again, I will fucking murder him, and I'll do it in broad daylight, and I'll invite the cops to watch." "Okay, I'm not in touch with him anymore, okay?" " Look, do you want to sit?" " No." "I'm not staying." "Okay." "Look, I'm sorry about this." "The cops, they're just doing their job..." "I don't give a fuck about Noah Solloway!" "It's this shit!" "This drama that comes with you." "I don't need it in my life!" " Okay." "I'm sorry." " Stop apologizing." " Okay." " My life is good when you're not around." "Business is booming." "My family's doing better." "Luisa and I are solid." "And then you show up, and you see me settled, and you just think to yourself, "Nope, that shit can't stand." "I got to fuck that right up."" "No." "That's not what I'm trying to do." " Aren't you?" " No." "Jesus, Cole." "God, you..." "you have everything." "Okay?" "I'm sitting..." "You created this situation!" "You left your child in the middle of the night!" " I know." " So don't you fucking complain to me about the consequences of abandoning your baby!" "No, I did not abandon her!" "I left her with her fucking father!" "You can't possibly imagine how much I hate myself for what I did." "And that's why I'm doing exactly what you and the court and everybody tells me to, because I know that I deserve to be punished." "We are not trying to punish you." "We're trying to protect Joanie's safety." "Yeah, I know, and that's why I'm trying so hard to prove... [sighs] God, I..." "I see my own daughter once a week with a stranger watching me bathe her, feed her." "It's awful." "But I'm doing it, and I'm not complaining, so please just, like, cut me a little slack." "Cole?" "[sighs]" "Thank you for what you did today." "I'll try and leave you alone, okay?" "I-I don't want to make anything more difficult for you." "[♪♪]" "[belt buckle jingles and zipper rasps]" " [Alison] One, two..." " [Joanie] I got some more leaves." " _ - [Alison] More?" "Okay." "Ready?" "Three!" "Whoo!" "[laughs]" "Okay." "Ready?" "[giggles] Okay." "[gasps] Ah!" "Yay!" "[applauds]" "Good girl!" "Yeah!" "[kisses]" " Now you." " Now me?" "Ooh, okay." "Ready?" "Gonna take my shoes off." "Okay." "Ah!" "[both laugh]" "Aww." "You gorgeous girl." "Now, what do you want to do now?" "Monkey bars." "Monkey bars." "Okay." "[indistinct conversation]" "Monkey bars." "Yeah, let's go." "[indistinct conversation]" "Okay, you know what?" "That's a little high." "I'm fine." "Okay." "You all right?" "Okay." "That's en..." "Joanie." "Okay." "Hey, Joanie." "Joanie." "Wait." "[sighs] Joanie." "Okay, that's enough now, Joanie." "Joanie." "Jo..." "Wait." "Watch." "Here." "Okay." "Good girl." "That's it." "That's it." "Okay, that's it." "Right, good girl." "No." "Okay." "Hey." "Oh, look, you did it!" "Oh, you did it!" "Oh, my brave girl." "Hey." "Oh." "My brave girl." "Yeah." "[indistinct conversation] [sighs] All right, so, what shall we do now?" " Swings." " Swings." "God, you're so big now." "Look at you." "Hm." "Do you remember when I was born?" "Yeah." "Of course I do." "Was it a day or a night?" "Um, it was a night." "It was a rainy night." "It was a big storm." "The wind was so strong," "I thought the windows might blow out." " Hm." " Was Daddy there?" "Yeah, Daddy was there." "He was feeding me ice chips." "You know, that's really all daddies can do in that moment." "[Cole] We got to get going." "Come on, kiddo." "Right." "[Cole] Get up." " Got the water?" " Okay, let's go." "All right." "Good girl." " Okay, bye, Peppa Pig." " Bye, Mummy Pig." "[laughs] Oh." "Okay, I'll see you in, ooh, 20 hours and ten minutes." "[gasps] That's when your party is." "Exciting!" "Exciting!" "Muah." "Love you." " [Joanie] Bye!" " [Alison] Bye!" " [Cole] Buckle up." " So, Marlena left?" "Yeah." "She had another appointment." "Well, how did I do today?" "What do you mean?" "Well, did she say anything to you about, you know, my behavior?" "I saw you two talking, so..." "We were talking about her kids." "We don't talk about you." "That would be unethical." "No." "Right." "I just, you know, thought maybe she said something about..." "She didn't." "Right." "Okay." "Well, I-I think it went great." "Oh, uh, by the way, I want to bake a cake for the party." " A cake?" " Yeah." "Like a birthday cake." "Is that a problem?" "No." "No, but we're a... a no-nut household." "Luisa's got an allergy." "Okay." "Got it." "No nuts. [chuckles]" "Ah... one more thing, Cole." "Um, can Joanie spend the night on Tuesday?" "You know, for her actual birthday?" " Alone?" " Yeah." "That's an unsupervised visit." "No, I know." "But I-I think I've earned it, don't you?" "That's not up to me." "That's up to the court." "No, I know." "But if you say it's okay, then the court's not gonna stop you, right?" " I mean..." " [sighs]" "Never mind." "I'm sorry." "I-I shouldn't have asked." "It's fine." "I'll talk to Luisa." "But I'm not promising anything." " [car door shuts] - [engine turns over]" "Ooh, bye, baby!" "[kisses] Love you, sweetie." "Bye!" "[sighs]" "[Jessica Lea Mayfield's "Blue Skies Again" playing on stereo]" "♪ This heart of mine is ready for the spring ♪" "♪ Open up my window ♪" "♪ Winterbird take wing ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ Suddenly I can see blue skies again... ♪" "[♪♪]" " Oh, shit." " ♪ Beauty says nothing less ♪" "Shit." "Okay." "♪ And our hearts will mend ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ I... ♪" "[indistinct chatter] [car alarm chirps]" "Um, well, I've been swimming and doing yoga." "Just keeping healthy and trying to stay focused." "And of course spending as much time with Joanie as I can." "You know, we've gotten some real quality time together, and it's getting better and better." "Uh, the bond is there, and, um, my-my confidence has never been higher." "Okay." "Well-well, I suppose I just want to make sure" "I'm doing everything I can so that this next hearing goes my way." "You know, unsupervised visits are technically the next step, and, um, I'm ready for it." "And I really want this to happen." "So anything you can do to help would..." "You know it's not up to me." "Uh, yeah, I understand." "I just... but, you know, we both know that your opinion will mean a lot to the judge." "Maybe it will." "Maybe it won't." "If you really want my opinion, there are issues outstanding." "I've said this to you." "The forensic report is... not flattering." "Your issues with depression and your breakdown are described in some detail." "Yeah, well, they're in the past." "Still, the court-appointed psychologist questions how reliable..." "The report is old." "I've proven myself consistently." "I also really need to consider whether my client is ready for unsupervised visits." "The current situation has been and remains stressful for my client." "You mean my five-year-old daughter?" "I'm sorry." "I just find it a little strange when you refer to her as your client." "Well, whether you like it or not," "I was appointed by the court to advocate for her." "Yeah, uh, I know." "I'm sorry." "Please, continue." "Have you found a job, Ms. Bailey?" "Uh, well, I'm still the owner of The Lobster Roll, so that brings me a healthy income." "Uh, a-and... and recently I've been thinking of trying to reinstate my nursing license." "So, no job." "And, um, your marriage to the ex-convict who killed your brother-in-law?" "How's that going?" "I told you." "We're estranged." "But not divorced." "No." "I've got to be honest with you, Ms. Bailey." "The problem isn't me." " Fuck!" " [horn honks slightly]" "[gasping]" "[♪ somber music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "All right." "[♪♪] [engine turns over]" "[♪♪]" "[knocking at door]" "Ms. Bailey, I'm Detective Stanton." "This is my partner, Detective Romero." "Livingston, New Jersey." "You mind if we have a word?" "What is this about?" "Uh, my daughter?" " Oh, no, no, no, no, no." " No, no, no." "It's nothing like that at all." "Sorry." "We didn't mean to alarm you." "No." "This is about your estranged husband." "Have you heard from him lately?" "No. [scoffs]" "Well, you should know" "Mr. Solloway was stabbed in the neck Wednesday night." "What?" "What?" "It... well, is he okay?" "Oh, yeah, yeah, he's okay." "He's gonna be fine." " Well, where?" " In New Jersey at the college campus where he teaches." " [Stanton] Uh, Ms...." " Oh, my God, I-I, uh..." "Ms. Bailey, have you spoken to Mr. Solloway at all since his release from prison?" "No." "We-we haven't spoken in almost a year." "I... well, do... do you know who did this?" " [groans softly]" " We got a couple of leads." "You know, we're talking to people we think might've had a beef or two with Mr. Solloway." "Yeah, and speaking of which, would you have any idea where your ex-husband was on Wednesday night?" "Cole?" "He wasn't with you, was he?" "No." "Why... why would he be with me?" "I..." "No reason." "No, we're-we're just looking for an alibi." "You know what?" "We'll, uh... we'll just go talk to him." "Yeah, that's a good idea, you know?" "We-we don't need to waste any more of your time." "Here." "If, um... if anything comes to you." "Thank you." "Uh, wait, detectives." "I-I, uh," "I really don't want any part of this." "I-I'm in a custody situation, and I-I..." "I really don't need the trouble." "We understand." "We're sorry to bother you." "What are you making?" "Uh, um, frosting." "You know, for a cake." "[chuckles] My daughter's birthday." " [Romero] Nice." " Night." "[Noah] Hey." "It's me." "Um... [♪ somber music ♪] ...I know you told me not to contact you, but, uh... [♪♪] ...but I, um, I just needed to hear your voice, so..." "[♪♪]" "And now I have, so, so, uh..." " [line clicks]" " Oh, no." "[♪♪]" "[phone dialing]" "[Noah] Hey, it's Noah Solloway." "Please leave... [phone clatters]" "[♪♪]" "Oh, shit." "[upbeat music playing]" "[♪♪] [overlapping chatter]" "[♪♪]" "[guests chattering]" "[horse whinnies]" "[♪♪] [sighs]" "[horse whinnies]" "[inaudible conversation]" "[♪♪]" "I think yours looks better." "[both chuckle]" " Hey." " Hey." "Where's little O?" "Oh, Jenny's feeding him inside." "Kid can't eat in loud places." "Can you imagine?" "Me with an oversensitive son?" "[both laugh]" "No." "Hey." "Let's get a beer." "[indistinct conversation]" "[Oscar] Bailey, come on." "Let's get a beer." " [beer hisses]" " No, no, I probably shouldn't." " [laughs] Wow." " Yeah." "You get your cavities filled without Novocaine too?" "[scoffs] I'm fine, Oscar." "Then why am I so nervous?" "Hey, uh, let me ask you." "Are town council meetings still on Wednesday nights?" "Mm-hmm." "They are." "Why?" "You thinking about running?" "You can have my spot." "So over this town." "Was Cole there last week?" "Um actually, no, I don't think he was." " Why?" " Uh, no-no reason." "I was just, you know, wondering." "[Oscar] Mm." "[Cole] Wondering about what?" "Alison here is thinking of running for town council." "Really?" "Yeah." "Maybe." "One day." "So, how you doing?" " I'm fine." " [Oscar chuckles]" "All right, well, I'm gonna go check on Jenny, make sure the kid's not sucking her boobs off." " [all chuckle]" " I swear he's stealing everything from me." "Wow." "You guys really went all out." "It's great." "Well, it is her fifth birthday, so..." "Well, did you buy her a horse?" "[chuckles] No." "No." "That's a rental." "You know, pony rental." "That's not a pony, Cole." "That's a horse." "Her name is Sparkles." "Don't worry." "I'm not worried." "[indistinct chatter]" "[♪ somber music ♪]" "[Luisa] Ready?" "Cheese!" "[♪♪]" "Who wants to ride the pony?" " [children scream and cheer]" " Me!" "[Luisa] Pony!" "[♪♪]" "It's your birthday, so you get to go first." "[Joanie] I don't want to ride the pony." "I want more cake." "[Cole] Okay, you can have another piece of cake after you ride the pony." "[Joanie] I don't want to." " [Cole sighs]" " Look, I can take her for cake." " It's okay." " It's fine." "I can." "Joanie, nobody else can go before you go." "Look, she doesn't want to ride." "Of course she does." "She asked for this." "Yeah, and now she's scared, so let her watch some kids go first." " Alison, don't make a scene." " I'm..." "I'm not." "She doesn't want to go, Cole." "No." "You don't want her to go." "She sees you scared." "It's making it worse." "[Cole] It is your birthday, and you are a big girl now." "You're gonna be fine, okay?" "Up you go." "Hands on the horn." "Got her?" "There you go." "All right. [sighs]" "[Cole chuckles]" "[♪ tense music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "[breathing shakily]" "[breathing heavily]" "[♪♪]" "[Joanie screams]" "[♪ dramatic music ♪]" "[♪♪] [man] Call 911!" "[♪♪]" "[Cole's voice distorted] Alison, stop, stop." "Hey, she's okay." "She's okay." "[normal voice] She's okay." "Look." " [Alison hyperventilating]" " Look." "Look." " [Cole] She's fine." " [Luisa] Was it scary?" "No?" " [Cole] She's okay." " It wasn't really scary." "You're fine." "Look at you." "[sighs and whimpers]" "I'm sorry." "It happens to me too." "[sighs]" "Joanie?" " Mama!" " Hey, sweetie." "Come here." "Oh, oh." " Are you okay?" " I fell." "I know you did." "I know you did." "I love you." "Hey." "Oh, come here." "Hey, Alison." "I wanted to give this back to you." "No, that's okay." "You can keep it." "No, we'll never eat it." "Well, I-I made it for Joanie." "Yeah." "That was very sweet of you." "Do you have any idea how hard I worked on this party?" "Luisa, what exactly is the problem?" "Well, the problem is you seem incapable of putting that child's needs before your own." "Why?" "Because I suggested that horse was too big for her?" "It was." "No." "You don't get it, do you?" "You make her uncomfortable." "She picks up on your anxiety and your unhappiness, and she gets nervous that you're gonna leave her again." "That's why she fell off the horse." "She had to look for you, because as soon as you're out of her sight line, she's afraid you'll fucking disappear." "You can't do that to children, Alison." "You can't just come and go as you like." " Okay." "I'm sorry." " For God sakes," "Cole says your mother left you as a child." "How could you do the same thing to her?" "Please, just leave me alone." "No!" "I'm sorry, but somebody has to say..." "Just stop, will you, please?" " [sighs]" " Don't be a monster." "She is my daughter, okay?" "I know I fucked up, and I've apologized a thousand times." "And I am so grateful to you for everything you did while I was gone, but she is my child." "And she needs me." "And you can everything, okay?" "You can have the restaurant," "Cole, the house, but please, please, don't take her away from me." "I don't deserve that." "Nobody does." "[Allison Moorer's "She Knows Where She Goes" plays on stereo]" "♪ She stares through her memories ♪" "♪ And the places she's been ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ She knows where she goes ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ She's so full of fire ♪" "♪ But she carries no torch ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ Too much wind for those ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ She can walk out the screen door ♪" "♪ And never leave the porch ♪" "[♪♪]" "♪ She knows where she goes ♪" "[♪♪]" "[water running]" "[knocking at door]" "Hi." "What are you doing here?" "Do you really think that I would stab Noah Solloway?" "No!" "What?" "I... no, of course not." "Then why did you send the police to me?" " I didn't." " Oh, Jesus, Ali, would you just stop lying for a second?" "Well, I-I don't know what you're talking about." "They ca... they came here, and they asked me... all right, you know what?" "I, uh... never mind." "Look, I'm sorry." "About everything." "I..." "Did you build that?" "[♪ soft dramatic music ♪] [sighs] Yeah." "For her birthday." "[♪♪]" "Look." "Watch." "[♪♪]" "I thought if she stayed over, I could surprise her with it." "I know we're in a terrible situation." "And I-I know I-I'm the one that put us there." "I know I did an awful thing." "But I came back." "And I'm here, and I'm not leaving again." "I'm gonna stay in this town watching you..." "Watch... watching you love somebody else." "And watching you raise Joanie with somebody else." "And that's gonna have to be enough for me." "You know, and there are days like today where I look around and I think, "You know... [sighs] oh, God, this is it." "This is as good as it gets." "For the rest of my life."" "I wish I'd done it all differently." "But I didn't." "But the only thing I can do now is be brave enough to live with the consequences, and I will." "But please, please, you don't have to keep punishing me, okay?" "I promise you I am punishing myself already." "Alison." "[♪♪]" "[heavy breathing]" "Cole?" "[car approaching]" "[car door opens and shuts]" "I tried calling." "[sighs]" "You can have Joanie on Tuesday for her birthday." "Cole said you wanted that." "Uh, yeah." "Thank you." "Well, I-I don't want to be a monster, so..." "I-I'm sorry I said that." "I..." "Maybe he's right." "Maybe your bad decisions really are behind you." "Don't make me regret this." "[car door opens and closes] [engine turns over]" "[♪ soft dramatic music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "[bird squawks]" "[♪♪] [breathing deeply]" "[♪♪]" "[♪♪]" "[♪ dark music ♪]" "[♪♪]" "[♪♪]"