"National Television." "Steve Shorter." "Slate one, take one." "I would just like to say to you all... how happy I am to be back in Britain after my American tour." "The name of this young man is Steven Shorter." "He is being given the first ticker-tape welcome in the history of Britain." "But Steven Shorter is not a president or a politician." "He is a pop singer." "The reason given for the extreme violence of the stage act that you are about to see is that it provides the public with a necessary release from all the nervous tension caused by the state of the world... outside." "The performance for which Steven Shorter is now being prepared is based on the sentence he once served in prison." "And so successful has this violent act become that Steven Shorter now finds himself" "the most desperately loved entertainer in the world." "Britain in the near future." "I see it all before me" "My path's a restless wander" "My days and nights are torment" "A world of misery" "The bonds of retribution" "Now laid so carefully" "I cannot shed my pain so easily now" "My spirit's broken" "No will to live" "My body's all aching" "My hands are tied" "I need my freedom" "Not your sympathy" "Look, you needn't love me" "Just set me free" "Come on, come on" "Set me free" "Set me free" "Is there a way out for me?" "I kneel before you helpless" "Is there somebody out there?" "To take a chance on me" "I don't pretend to virtue" "I don't ask anything" "But if you want to help me" "My freedom's everything" "Now look!" "My spirit's broken" "No will to live" "My body's all aching" "My hands are tied" "I need..." "I need my freedom" "Not your sympathy" "Look, you needn't love me" "Just set me free" "Come on, come on" "Please set me free" "Set me free" "I see it all before me" "My darkest days of sorrow" "Salvation's been denied me" "No hope of liberty" "I only ask one question" "Please tell me if you can" "What good is retribution" "Without a helping hand?" "There is now a coalition government in Britain which has recently asked all entertainment agencies to usefully divert the violence of youth." "Keep them happy, off the streets and out of politics." "Very good show tonight." "The basic thing is that, when we get this European thing settled down..." "By the way, Martin, I'd like you to..." "I'd like to look over some of the press releases I've got." "This should be the greatest European tour he's done yet." "By the way, as I mentioned before, the Far Eastern thing..." " The potential there is tremendous..." " Did somebody give him a drink?" "Yes, I've offered..." "Steve, do you want a drink?" "OK, you can let them in now, please." "Come in, ladies and gentlemen." "There will shortly be 61 people in this room of whom 54 have nothing whatever to do with Steven Shorter." "They are what you might call "professional leaners."" "All right, take it easy." "That's it." "Have a drink." "Vanessa Ritchie." "Commissioned by the Ministry of Culture to paint Steven Shorter." "I first saw Steven Shorter at a press reception given for him about 3 months ago." "I couldn't get very close because of the usual crowd of people around him." "There was just something about him." "It was the way he stood and looked in the midst of all those people." "I found a strange sort of emptiness and I just wanted to paint him." " What was your name?" "Hedy, wasn't it?" " It's Betty." "It's Betty!" "And this, our American friend, is John B. Marshall." "I'd like to say howdy, folks." "Cool it, John." "We'll hear from you later." "Isn't he wild?" "Enjoy yourself." "Have a ball!" "All right!" "Hold it, everybody!" "Present time, Uncle Julie." "Right now, it's present time." " What's all this about?" " It's your birthday, Uncle Julie. 65." "For he's a jolly good fellow!" "For he's a jolly good fellow!" "Look." "My accountant..." "Do me a favour: count backwards." "On the left is Alvin Kirsch, Press Officer to Steven Shorter." "And on the right is Jules Jordan, music publisher to Steven Shorter and grossing £250,000 per year." "Beautiful." "Just beautiful." "Thank you, Steve." "You're so good to me." "You want to repeat the kiss?" "A replay for the kids." "Is that too much?" "The evening of August 8th." "We are in one of 300 Steven Shorter discotheques specially built within the last few years to spread happiness throughout Britain." "Not in a million, million years..." "Look after this, will you?" "It's not business with us." "We're just one big happy family." "Look at this kid: a doll, a prince." "I love this boy." "Beautiful." "We didn't frame it because we didn't know where you'd like to put it." "Vanessa..." "Vanessa." "Martin Crossley, personal manager to Steven Shorter." "Do you find Miss Ritchie's painting exciting?" "Well, I don't really know much about art." "Ask me about birds..." "I wasn't suggesting that you should know about art." "I was just wondering if you had an opinion." "Freddie, what do you think?" "I don't know much about art." "Ask me about bees and I'll tell you." "Adolescent display is not really called for." " I was just asking for an opinion." " About her work?" "On the right is Freddie K, musical director to Steven Shorter and self-confessed anarchist." "It's not what it's about anymore, is it?" "If you really go seriously into it you want to go to a place where something's hanging that's got a bit of something it!" "Not all this nansy pansy stuff." "I mean sort of..." "She knows what I mean." "When you see it and it's a bit of everything that he's ever done." "A bit of everything like... bathing and it should be going to the toilet and that." "Everything's in it." "A bit of a man's life!" "A bit of his soul!" "A bit of everything!" "That's what it's all about." "It's not this..." "Isn't it?" "I'm sure you'll agree." " Steven, can we help you?" " I was..." "I'd like to dance." "We were trying to have a conversation about painting." "You might ask Miss Ritchie, Steven." "Hey, little girl, I'm in a whirl" "I've been a bad, bad boy" "I'm on my knees" "Forgive me, please" "I've been a bad, bad boy" "They're all watching you." "Well, they always are, aren't they?" "I was watching you last night on television." "I mean, obviously I've seen your act before but... this time I was looking at it much more clearly." "Oh, yeah, I know..." "I'm quite a phenomenon, aren't I?" "How does it go?" ""His act is nauseating." "It's sadistic."" "There was one girl they were interviewing." "She was sobbing and she was saying she'd kill herself for you." "Yeah, I saw her." "And?" "I thought she was lovely." "Excuse me, sir." "Step aside please." "Alvin Kirsch is coming through." "Would you please excuse me?" "Hey, kids." "Everything all right?" "I hate to break in at this time." "Do you think you could just cool it for a couple of minutes?" "Steve, I'd like to talk to you." "I'd like to tell you about the agreement numbers." "Why don't you...?" "You'd like this, too." "Steve..." "Even closer to you." "Steve Electrics." "Guaranteed." "Refrigerator, dishwasher, TV set..." "If we haven't got it Steve will get it for you." "He will because he can." "Steve genuinely loves dogs." "He knows you do too which is why Steve Chunk dog food is specially reduced in price from 10/6 on the current market to 8/6." "but not reduced in chunky, tail-wagging nourishment." "You are now in what is called a Steve Dream Palace." "These are 300 of these in Britain each designed to keep people happy and buying British." "Steve." "His symbol, the arrow, is your guarantee of satisfaction." "Don't forget that when you buy in here you're buying Steven Shorter." "14 stone, 7." " Did you see the chick tonight?" " You're certainly putting it on, son." "I'm not putting it on." "It's a little chemical problem." "The body is still there." "The form is still there." "They run after Steve but the overflow I still get, I want you to know." "What are you doing to your teeth so much?" "All that gargling." "Too much with that stuff." "By the way, we've got to do something about his wrists." " What wrists?" " What do you mean?" "His wrists." "They're getting cut up, all smashed up." "Why does he have to lose blood for nothing?" "I've got his name tattooed all over me." "Steve, I love you." "Steve, wait for me." "Steve, be mine tonight." "I dream about him a lot and they're always horrid dreams because he always dies in the end." "When I wake up I say thank you to God because it was only a dream." "We're falling down on two items, I said:" "repentance and heart." "Did they give you anything?" "I'm not a knocker of this kind of music but the intro goes something like this..." "Is he still giving you those 4 bar intros?" " 8 bars." " It's 4 bars, Uncle Julie." "You're counting it in 2." "It's 4 bars." "4 bars, 8 bars..." "Anyway..." "I said to the boy who wrote it what made him think of that kind of a sound?" "How does it come here?" "And you know what he said to me?" "Maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned but he said to me..." "And you'll never believe this, Alvin." "He said to me that the sound came to him when he was in a traffic jam." "The hooters were blaring..." "And that's how he came to the idea of the theme line." "Still, who am I to complain?" "His last disc sold... 1 million, 200,000." " Wasn't it 400,000?" " 200,000." "Anyway, we got together and we worked out a song." "Alvin, this could be a minor sensation." "Now, it goes like this..." "The boy's sitting in the prison cell..." "You got the picture?" "Mother..." "I never thought I'd miss your cooking" "Mother..." "You're the nearest and dearest to my heart" " Mother..." " When is the hook-up?" "Wait, wait, wait for it..." "Can't you see, Mother?" "The bridge needs a little work here but get the pay-off: the last line." "The salt spray of my t-e-a-r-s..." "I don't want say that it needs a little work but..." "Never thought I'd miss your..." "I'll start again." "Mother..." "I never thought I'd miss your cooking" "Mother..." "You're the nearest and dearest to me" "Mother..." "Can't you see, Mother?" "The salt spray of my t-e-a-r-s." " Well?" "How's that?" " It's a nice tune, Uncle Julie." "Well, no, no." "It's not." "It's a horrible tune." "Do you know what that tune is, Uncle Julie?" "It's a nostalgic breaking of wind after a dinner of sentimentality." "You know..." "I mean it's nothing." "Where's the adventure in it?" "This book is about a fat mother figure who eats her children with her sentimental rubbish and your tune panders to this." "The very instruments you play, the very balance is expressed by the shape." "There's nothing to them at all." "Mr. Hooper, how would you describe your function as Mr Shorter's administrator?" "Well, one example I can give you..." "About 18 months ago Steven was threatened with a paternity suit." "So... what did you do?" "Well..." "I procured an abortion and arranged for the young lady to be paid £500." "I see." "And how did you account for this expenditure?" "I put it down to petty cash." "We'll start with the American tour, please." "Andrew Goddard Butler director of a merchant bank in the City of London and chairman of Steven Shorter Enterprises Limited." "Very well, gentlemen." "We'll begin by asking Martin to give us the results of the American tour." "Right, gentlemen..." "The tour lasted 25 days and we covered some 64,700 miles of travel" "The 25 days resulted in 64 appearances, 14 television appearances and charity functions." "How many days off were there?" "Three." "Is the boy all right?" "Have I..." "Have I said anything to indicate that he isn't?" "The schedule sounds a little punishing." "His schedule had the full approval of Dr Malcolm." "Gentlemen, let's be quite clear on one point." "Steven Shorter's personal life is his own business." "That's as it should be." "But his well-being... physical and mental..." "is very much of concern to us all." "The last time I saw him I thought he seemed nervous and withdrawn." "I hope there's nothing... disturbing the boy of which we have no knowledge." "Stay there, Steve." "Just relax." "You're awfully tense today." "I don't know what's the matter with you." "Don't go away." "Give him a ball someone." "Throw him a ball, will you?" "Get a few of you tossing this ball up in the air..." "Can we get a ball please?" "Someone give him a ball." "Greg, will you give him the ball please?" "Very nice." "That's it." "Stretch it out towards me, Steve." "Smile." "Don't forget to smile." "That's very nice!" "Our first problem was to naturally get rid of 35 pounds of excess weight." "So we put him on this special gymnasium-type gymnastic course with a lot of choppy and exciting exercises." "I don't know what they did but they fixed up the problem." "I'd say it took us about anywhere from 18 months to 2 years to get him into his present physical shape." "Now what about taking your jacket off?" "That towelling thing you've got on." "Get a few of you in your shorts." "Come on, that's a great idea!" "A few for the girls!" "Do I have to?" "Yes." "Come on, Steve." "What's the matter with you?" "You look wonderful." "Beautiful day." "Come on." "Steve, just for a couple of shots." "Can you just take it off?" "It won't take too long." " I won't take long, Steve." " Just a couple of shots, Steve." "Just a few." "Come on now." "It's great." "Wonderful." "Good." "Now, Steve..." "Smile, nice smile." "You're awfully tense." "Relax." "Right." "Now put your chest out." "Beautiful one for the girls..." "Now then, Steve, another one." "And smile..." " You got a fridge?" " No." "Better buy you one then." "Steve likes his chilled tomato juice about 11." "The following morning Bill Franks, personal bodyguard to Steven Shorter and 5 ft 11 inches in uplift boots inspects the amenities within Vanessa Ritchie's studio." "Got hot and cold then?" "Toilet upstairs I suppose?" "That's a bit strong, isn't it?" "Is this where it all happens, then?" "Darling?" "Yeah, I suppose this..." "Well, this ought to do us, then, darling." "When am I going to have another session with Steve?" "Tomorrow." "Yeah, tomorrow after the commercial." " What commercial?" " Apple Marketing Board." "Here, have one." "Good for your sex life." " I eat a bowl a day myself." " Well, they don't do much for me." "That's 'cos you don't eat the pips, isn't it?" "Darling..." "Isn't it?" "Anyone ever told you you're quite edible?" "Give us a bite, then." "Mr. Jackman, what exactly is the commercial purpose of today's advertisement?" "That's really quite straightforward." "What we've got is the largest national apple glut ever and unless something drastic is done in the next 3 weeks" "642 million apples will rot." "So the object of this commercial and the 34 others which are planned is to get every man, woman and child..." "The wind's changed direction." "Can you move the fog machine down to the water please?" "That is, babes in arms and old age pensioners excepted... to eat 6 apples a day for the whole of the summer." "Now, Mr. Arbutt, how would you describe your technique in shooting this commercial?" "Well, I've been very influenced by the work of the Moscow Art Theatre and certain of our modern philosophers." "I would describe my approach as existentialist." "Would you care to elaborate on that a little?" "Well, for example, today the actors must all think apples be apples and ultimately become apples." "You see, one must remember that there are millions of viewers sitting captive in their sitting rooms who are yearning for... for the reality and tranquility and the beauty of the countryside." "Right, thank you, Dave." "Head up, head up..." "Alvin!" "One more, Steve." " Can you get rid of them, please?" " All right, fellers." "Fellers..." "Steve!" "Thank you." "Alvin!" "Get rid of them!" "Fellers, ease up." "That's it." "All right everyone, let's have some quiet please." "We're going to have a few words from our sponsor." "Our sponsor!" "Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen." "This morning I received a telegram from our real sponsor the Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries and I'm sure that the unit and artists would like me to read it before we start shooting." ""Good luck today with commercial number 17 stop" ""Minister delighted campaign already bearing fruit."" "Now stand by everyone and quiet." "We're going to have a run-through from the top with music." "And remember everyone, please:" "for the next 90 seconds we are all going to be apples." "I reckon the director's a bleedin' nut." "Right." "Standby, ducks." "Stand by, swans." "Stand by, early morning mist." "Stand by, Sylvia." "Camera!" "Mark it!" "National Apple Marketing Board." "Scene One." "Take One." "Running on a Guide Track." "In this girl's ears the clangour of war." "About her the smoke of her burning childhood." "Her country has been raped, ravaged and rapined." "We see it in her eyes:" "the ugliness of war." "Man's inhumanity to man." "But then a glade, a glade of peace..." "The tortured, hunted look in her eyes becomes soft." "Peace!" "Beauty!" "Freshness!" "The soft touch of morning dew!" "The gentle lull of blossom!" "But what is in her basket?" "And why does she stand as though in expectancy?" "Are we eavesdropping on a secret tryst in the midst of war?" "And then a twig snaps in the forest!" "To the minute!" "To the hour!" "Steve has returned!" "He's been riding for 76 days." "22 horses have dropped from under him." "His eyes are rimmed with fatigue." "Caked with the dust of war." "With his own hands he has wrenched open the gates of Jerusalem!" "With his own hands he has crushed an infidel army of 30,000!" "He has fought the mighty fight!" "He needs sustenance!" "He needs apples!" "Now we know what's in the basket." "He wearily stumbles after her, his whole body demanding one thing in his eyes a desperate desire." "She leads him... she leads him into the glade of apples." "It is this that has given him his inner strength!" "Now we know what enabled this man to fight the mighty fight." "We know what it is that has succoured him what it is that has sustained him what it is that makes his eyes lose the ferocity of war!" "It can only be one thing!" "Apples!" "Apples!" "Apples!" "Apples!" "Apples!" "Apples!" "Mr. Jackman, how did you manage to get Steven Shorter for your commercial?" "I just had a few words with his manager, Mr. Crossley." "They must have been very persuasive words, Mr. Jackman." "£30,000." "Steve..." "Andrew's been very worried about you lately." "He was saying to me that he thinks you seem much too nervous." "I think he's wondering if there's anything that might be upsetting you." "Is there?" "Is that why...?" "I suppose that's why they've brought you in." "So they can... keep tabs on me." "Whose idea was that?" "Crossley's, I suppose." " No, it wasn't." " Bastard." "If you and Martin don't like each other why do you keep working together?" "Very simple answer to that... as far as he's concerned." "He takes 15%." "You'll probably find that's why Andrew's..." "What is it? "Concerned" about me." "Steve, what do mean?" "Well, you don't think... he's chairman of Shorter Enterprises for nothing, do you?" "I wonder if you'd be kind enough to ask Steven to come in." "I think he ought to hear what we're now going to discuss." "Steve, would you come in please?" "Are you well, Steven?" "Yes, sir." "Good." "Miss Crawford, gentlemen, we come to the central point of today's meeting." "Professor Tatham." "We live in difficult times." "We face on every side the danger of overthrow by the forces of communism and anarchy." "We must now for the sake of national cohesion and survival lock together into a single mould." "We must become one unit to resist these forces." "And, to ensure this move, we must of necessity subdue the critical elements in the country's youth." "This is why we first made Steven Shorter more violent than anyone else... because we knew this violence would have a more direct appeal to the youth of the moment." "Now we are going to use that appeal by changing it." "Gentlemen, in accordance with our planned campaign and because we've reached commercial saturation point." "In 10 days' time we're going to make Steven Shorter repent." "We're going to make him say, "I'm sorry for what I've done."" "We're going to make him say, "Now I want to go back into society."" ""Now I will accept law and order."" ""No longer will I criticize or rock the boat."" "We're going to make Steven Shorter say these things because we want, as we've always wanted the youth of Britain to say them also." "This is excellent, very exciting." "Now for clothes and new designs, Miss Crawford..." "August 14th..." "Item on the agenda:" "The Youth of the Future." "As you can see, gentlemen, the accent in about 10 days' time will dramatically swing to..." "Thank you, Tony." "Thank you, Daphne." "to respectability, cleanliness, social grace and, above all... a new-found innocence." "The masculine will become softer the feminine line more feminine." "And gone forever will be the prison motif." "Thank you, Tony." "You will notice that Daphne no longer wears the penal collar but has an open, soft look and that Tony no longer has restrictive stitching which imprisoned the body in the last two years." "He is freer, much freer." "Thank you, Tony." "Thank you, Daphne." "In other words, gentlemen, they are released." "Thank you, gentlemen." "Excellent!" "Quite Excellent!" "As we've seen, gentlemen, we are about to launch one of the most dramatic changes of popular image ever seen." "The only problem that remains is will the public, en masse, accept it?" "We believe so because of Steven's power." "But to make sure my research team and I suggest that when you present Steven in his new image for the first time you do so in conjunction with an Establishment event." "We have compiled a short list from many dozens of applications." "The Central Office of Information the Board of Trade, the Ministry of Defence the British Tourist Board..." "I've sounded out the Foreign Office and unofficially they've informed me they'd be delighted to sponsor Steven on a world tour." "The Air Ministry, the Inland Waterways Board and the Commonwealth Office." "Gentlemen... haven't we forgotten someone?" "Haven't we forgotten the one person who smiled upon us all?" "Onward!" "Onward!" "Onward, Christian soldiers" "Marching as to war" "With the cross of Jesus" "Going on before" "Onward Christian soldiers" "Marching as to war" "With the cross of Jesus" "Going on before" "Christ, the royal Master leads against the foe" "Onward into battle" "See His banners go!" "Onward, Christian soldiers" "Marching as to war" "With the cross of Jesus" "Going on before" "Like a mighty army Moves the church of God" "Brother, we are treading" "Where the saints have trod" "We are not divided" "All one body we" "One in hope and doctrine" "One in charity" "Onward Christian soldiers" "Marching as to war" "With the cross of Jesus" "Going on before" "Onward!" "Onward!" "Was that happiness?" "Was that pure happiness?" "Music lovers..." "And I know you are musical lovers..." "I'm sure that even He sitting in His celestrial soundbooth would have heard that and said, "Open thy mouth." ""Judge righteously and plead the cause of the poor and the needy."" ""Judge righteously and plead the cause of the poor and the needy"." "In other words, Reverend Holinesses, is it a hit... or is it a miss?" "Oh, a hit." "Yes, most definitely a hit." "Excellent!" "I think you've been influenced by Count Basie but excellent!" "A trifle noisy but I think it will serve our purpose excellently." "Yes, yes." "It certainly will." "Gentlemen, aren't we in danger of losing our spiritual bearings?" "We are in the process of launching Christian Crusade Week and the Steven Shorter Management Group have just agreed to lend us the services of Shorter." "The decline in church attendances according to poll figures is such that by 1990 only the clergy will be coming to church." "This is, of course, a slight exaggeration but we do feel the need of... something radical being done about the situation." "They seem to have more brains than I gave them credit for." "It's really quite simple." "Steven Shorter has the largest following in the history of the entertainment business." "We need a larger audience so we are using Steve's and we hope that through him many of these followers will return to the faith." "Would you mind sitting down?" "Sorry." "Is it only you on your radio?" "Can we try another station?" "And another?" "Do you know that's the first time I've seen you smile?" "Yeah, well, I am human..." "I was beginning to wonder." "You're always so tense." "What do you do to relax?" "I listen to music." "Always your own?" "Yeah." "Do you do anything else?" "I mean if you weren't here now what would you be doing?" "Well, I'd probably be asleep." "At 3 o'clock in the afternoon?" "Yeah..." "I usually sleep until about 5." "Then I get up and watch the television." "Children's programmes are on then." "I like them." "Are your parents alive?" "Yeah." "Steve, have you ever been really close to anyone?" " Yeah, well, Alvin and Julie." " Oh, come off it!" "We all know what they're in it for." "Yeah, but I mean someone's got to... bring me my tea in the mornings, haven't they?" "Well, I wouldn't like to see those two standing by my bedside." "I suppose you're right." "Especially Uncle Julie..." "Mr Jordan, what can you tell us about Steven Shorter?" "What can I say?" "It's like father and son." "It's a family relationship like..." "brother to brother." "Well, it's the relationship that counts." "I mean he is unbelievably adaptable to anything he does." "It's when calls me Uncle Julie." "It's when he confides in me." "It's like the other day, when he said to me" ""Uncle Julie, if ever I have a daughter" ""I'd like to see her grow up like your wife, Gladys."" "Believe me when I tell you he never gives us any worries at all." "So you've never really been close to anyone?" "No..." "Well, there was this girl once about a year ago." "She was nice." "But... we were on tour at the time and Alvin suggested I stop seeing her." "And you did?" "Well, yeah." "I mean, you must understand... that he is in every sense of the word a gilt-edged investment." "He is the most important personality in the entire history of show business and therefore has to be watched very carefully indeed." "And, as I tell him, God has given him something" "He hasn't given to anyone in the last 500 years." "He does not belong to himself." "He belongs to the world and therefore he no longer has any right to himself." "Yesterday he brought along a framed picture of Alvin... that Alvin wanted to give me." "I think Alvin has got a thing about me, if you know what I mean." "It had been signed something like..." ""With me it's not love but happiness."" "I thought this was very funny and I laughed." "And then he laughed as well and..." "well, it was nice." "But then he sort of drew back into himself and it was over." "And that's how it normally is." "It's very difficult to get near him... which is why, I suppose, the painting is... well, so far... empty." "You may not believe this but... a short while back we counted every hair on his head." "The reason being is that we're marketing a Steven Shorter wig and we'd like to guarantee that the placing of every hair is identical." "Another point of interest is that when we cut Steve's hair we do not sell this." "I must make a point of this." "We do not sell the cut hair." "We donate this to charity." "On August 20th the combined churches of Britain and" "Steven Shorter Enterprises Limited hold a press conference." "All right, fellas, could we have your attention, please?" "Could we have the proper decorum please?" "Gentlemen of the press can we pull on the cigars?" "Drink plenty of the champagne:" "it's from the Vatican Vineyards." "Ladies and gentlemen, you all know about the great event that's about to take place next week in the National Stadium." "Freddie, would you come here for a second please?" "Now this is the poster that will be displayed in prominent places throughout the country." "Do you notice something a little different about Steve's position?" "You do." "Right." "Well, we'll talk about that and we'll tell you more about that a little later on." "By the way, at the bottom sits a picture of the Reverend Jeremy Tate who'll be introduced to you a little later on as well." "You'll notice that the price of the tickets range from 10 shillings to £25 for those of us who are a little more fortunate." "At this time, ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce your friend, my friend and certainly God's friend... a honey of a chap and a million laughs, let's welcome the Bishop of Essex." "I feel sure after such an introduction that Heaven must be round the corner." "Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasant duty to introduce the brightest star in our clerical firmanent who will join with Steven Shorter in our great drive for God." "I give you... the Reverend Jeremy Tate!" "Is there anything you'd like to tell us about the Reverend Jeremy Tate?" "Yes, he's 35, lives alone and loves a good day of fishing." "In holy waters naturally!" "But hasn't the Reverend Jeremy Tate got any views himself?" "The Church's views and those of the Reverend Jeremy Tate will be found in the official pamphlet pages 3 and 4." "My Lord, isn't the Church using Mr Shorter for the purpose of gaining converts?" "At one time the Church used the methods of the Inquisition to gain converts." "We find Mr Shorter a little less painful." "Don't we, Jeremy?" "I thought I was the only one with the answers." "Steve, would you like to come up here for a moment, please?" "Now, ladies and gentlemen, as you can see this is the first time you have ever seen Steven Shorter wearing the colour red." "Now let me make this clear." "Red is the colour that is associated with the release of Steven Shorter which will be seen by the public next week at the National Stadium." "But naturally, for you fine gentlemen of the press we are now holding a sort of pre-release of this release... sort of giving him a slight temporary freedom." "Now here we have the keys to Steven's freedom." "Steve..." "There's one..." "There we go..." "There's two." "Steve, would you hold the hands up?" "Ladies and gentlemen, Steven Shorter is released." "What would you say if I... if I said I wanted to..." "I wanted to... stop all this?" "Well I'd say it was unfortunate." "More for us than for you." "You see, I believe you play a very important part in society, Steven." "How can I explain it to you?" "I..." "Come with me." "There are millions of people down there." "Millions of little people." "First we must be quite clear in our minds about one thing:" "that the liberal idea that, given enough education these millions will grow into self-aware creative human beings" "is nothing but an exploded myth." "It can never happen." "They're stunted little creatures with primitive emotions that are, in themselves, dangerous." "They've got to be harnessed, guided." "We've seen it happen over and over again for an evil purpose." "Germany, Russia, China..." "But now we've got a chance to make it work for their own good." "You..." "You're our chance, Steven." "They identify with you." "They love you." "Steven, you can lead them into a better way of life... a fruitful conformity." "Steven, may I say how delighted we all are to have you with us today?" "And I'm sure everybody will join me in... wishing you every success for tomorrow night." "I think I'd... prefer hot chocolate instead." "You'd prefer what, Steven?" "I'd like some hot chocolate instead." "You'd like some too, wouldn't you?" "Well..." "OK, yes." "You'll join us, Andrew?" "Yes, why not?" " And everybody else too?" " Yes, everybody else too." "Hot chocolate for everyone please, William." " Hot chocolate, sir?" " Yes, hot chocolate." "I prefer the wine... if you don't mind." "Oh, Martin, come." "You haven't tasted my chocolate." "It has the most exquisite bouquet." "Thank you, William." "Martin, can't you see that what Steven did was a protest?" "Don't be absurd, Andrew." "He had nothing whatever to protest about." "He was just being extremely tiresome." "It isn't as simple as that." "I'm getting sick and tired of people telling me how to do my own job." "You won't have a job to do unless you stop treating him like a machine." "Now look, let's get one thing..." "He's a sensitive boy and not unintelligent." "In 2½ years I have brought that boy up from nothing to what he is." "And during practically every single day of that 2½ years" "I have watched and moulded Steven." "And I think I'm going to know better than anybody else if that boy is psychologically disturbed or just being plain bloody-minded." "Today he was just being plain bloody-minded." "What he did today he did out of desperation." " Desperation!" " Yes, desperation." "Why don't any of them do anything?" "Why don't they stop me?" "Any of them!" "Just one!" "Butler or somebody!" "They just take it, don't they?" "They just drink the stuff!" "Why doesn't Butler stop me?" "He probably thinks you had a reason." "I thought you had a reason." "Oh God!" "Reason!" "I don't need a reason!" "None of them's got the guts to say "Get stuffed, Steve" once and for all!" "They don't need a reason." "They just take it and love it." "We'll drink your marvellous hot chocolate with our lobster and love it!" "Marvellous!" " None of them says no." " Some of them didn't want to do it." "All right so some of them didn't want to do it." "But every single one of them did it." "Not one refused." "You didn't even stand up and refuse to do it." "You're just the same as everyone!" "What about you?" "You never say no, do you?" "I've never heard you say no to anyone." "Not Alvin, Butler, Crossley, anyone." "I know nobody ever says no any more." "I know that!" "But who do you think made this happen?" "Who's responsible?" "What made it happen?" "You did!" "How am I responsible?" "What's so special about me?" "Steve, people admire you." "I admire you." "Butler admires you." "They look up to you." "You represent something very important to them." "What do you mean represent?" "Tell me, what do I represent?" "September 10th." "The National Stadium in London." "I can't reach it." "I can't reach it." "There." "Now can you reach it?" "May the love of God be always with you." "Amen." "What you are now watching is the largest staging of nationalism in the history of Great Britain." "Now is the beginning of Christian Crusade Week and praise be to God!" "Led by a section of the Durham Queen's Scouts detachments of Christian bodies from all over the country pulse with ear-tingling music and breathless precision into an unequalled expression of national solidarity." "We calculate that the gate money from each of these performances will gross on average approximately £135,000." "The coalition government of Britain formed because of the complete lack of difference between the policies of the Conservative and Labour parties has given both its blessing and a state subsidy to the mounting of Christian Crusade Week because, as the official pamphlet states" ""we need no longer have any disturbing political differences" ""When we are all of one faith and believe in one God and one flag."" "This black card will be issued to you as you leave the Stadium tonight." "On it there are three words." "They are simple words but they are vital words." "They are words which we must now, all of us, begin using because, since the end of the War, we in Britain have become apathetic, slack, loose in our morality." "National cohesion has become unimportant to us!" "We must fight this." "We must." "Now, all of us begin to use the words on the card!" ""We will conform."" "Those are the words." "We will conform." "And when I say the word conform" "I want all of you to shout in one clear voice in reply" "We will conform!" "Now, conform!" "We will... conform!" "Above all we must follow the example of a young man who found repentance... who found faith... who found God... who found all of these things... who found the Word." "And now he is here with you tonight." "To our shining example." "To the light." "To the path." "To a way." "And did those feet in ancient times" "Walk upon England's mountains green" "And was the holy lamb of God" "On England's pleasant pastures seen" "And did the countenance divine" "Shine forth upon our clouded hills" "And was Jerusalem builded here" "Among those dark Satanic mills" "Bring me my bow of burning gold" "Bring me my arrows of desire" "Bring me my spears o'clouds unfold" "Bring me my chariot of fire" "I will not cease from mental fight" "Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand" "'Til we have built Jerusalem" "In England's green and pleasant land" "Now it has been suggested that Steve's song which was specially written for this occasion may have certain auto-suggestive qualities to it from which the sick may derive some internal benefit." "Therefore those less fortunate than us will be brought before Steve in invalid chairs which we shall be providing, if I may say... free of charge." "I see it all before me" "My past of restless wander" "An evil heart within me" "An evil head to hold" "But in my hour of darkness" "A sun began to shine" "A sweeping spirit moved me" "A shining light was mine" "I see a pasture" "All green and gold" "A shepherd walking" "So brave and bold" "A congregation" "All on their knees" "His arms outstretching" "To you and me" "You and me" "We need His hand to guide us" "Along this chosen road" "We need His love to save us" "And bear our heavy load" "His pain was not for nothing" "His tears were not in vain" "What can a man believe in" "If not in Jesus name" "I see a chapel" "High in the sky" "Someone is waiting" "A tear in His eye" "I see Him calling" "I see Him smile" "And in His arms" "A little child" "His door is open" "To everyone" "I kneel before Him" "My time has come" "O Father, Father" "Your children call" "Defend our mothers" "Forgive us all" "Forgive us all" "In one evening in the National Stadium 49,000 people gave themselves to God and Flag through Steven Shorter" " Conform!" " We conform!" "Above all we must follow the example of a young man who found repentance... who found faith... who found God... who found all of these things... who found the Word." "And now he is here with you tonight." "To our shining example." "To the light." "To the path." "To a way." "What does he think I am?" "Steve, you could stop all this now." "And I want you to." "Why?" "I'm not asking you to feel anything for me." "It's not that at all." "It's just..." "I think you must go away somewhere." "You really need to." "Honestly." "My parents have got this place in the country and... they're away at the moment." "I think we should go there." "What did you say?" "What did you say?" "I said I think we should go away." "Oh, yeah?" "Like everybody..." "You want something." "It's obvious what you want, isn't it?" "What is it?" "Steve, let me see." "Steve..." "Take your shirt off." "Come on." "How long have you been like this?" "I thought your act was only pretending." "Steve, you've got to stop this." "You must stop it now." "Steve..." "What is it you want?" "What do you want?" "I then found out he was seeing this girl secretly." "And I say secretly." "Otherwise I would have known." "Yeah, I was about to break it up but I said to myself wait..." "Isn't he entitled to something?" "I mean, he gives of himself so much." "Isn't he entitled to his own small corner of the world?" "But I guess in this deal there just are no small corners." "What would you say if... if I asked you to marry me?" "Steve, it wouldn't work." "I'm very selfish probably when I say this but... it could only be on my terms." "Come here." "I'm a very private person." "I'm very possessive." "We'd never be alone together." "Not really alone." "September 25th." "The Federated Records Award Giving Dinner in London." "Miss Ritchie, is there anything you'd like to say concerning Steve's recent Stadium appearance?" "No, I've got nothing to say." " Nothing at all?" " No." "Well, what do you think about tonight's Award?" "I think it's very... remarkable." "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please?" "Thank you." "Now this is the moment you all have been waiting for." "What else can I say but..." "Steven Shorter!" "Now a little-known fact concerning the gentlemen about to make the presentation this evening is that before becoming a director of Federated Records" "Leo Stanley was a songwriter." "Now I don't want to say that his songs were bad but we had to re-write them before he could throw them away." "So, at this time, won't you join me in welcoming the Darling of the Wax world, Leo Stanley!" "My lords, ladies and gentlemen... and Steven Shorter." "I think I speak for you all when I say, "Steve, we're all your fans."" "What we have here is but a small token of our respect, admiration and gratitude." "In the last 3 years you've given great pleasure to an overwhelming number of people." "And, really, what more can I say but thank you, Steven Shorter." "You are more than an artist." ""From from the staff and executives of Federated Records" ""and its overseas subsidiaries in Germany, France, Japan, United States" ""to our platinum boy."" "You worship me as if I were... as if I were a sort of god." "I'm someone." "I'm a person." "I'm a person!" "I'm a person!" "I'm a person!" "When asked the reason for his overwhelming popularity 93.5% of the population of the British Isles said that they loved" "Steven Shorter because he so generously and willingly shared himself with everyone." "I am nothing." "This is me." "Nothing." "And this is you... because you've made me nothing." "I hate you!" "I hate you!" "I hate you!" "Forgive us all!" "All that Steven Shorter has just done has been to express the wish to become an individual." "But that, in an age of conformity, can become a social problem." "Alvin, out please!" "Thank you." "Out, Alvin!" "Hell of a row in the office." "I've just had Butler on the telephone." "We'll make a statement tomorrow." "Tell me what you're going to do." "You were the clever little boy." "Half an hour earlier you were making all the smart remarks." "Come on!" " Tell me what you're going to do." " Leave him alone, will you?" "Why did he do it?" "What do you think you are?" "A bloody preacher?" "Have you had a call?" "Have you had a vision?" "Why don't you leave him alone?" "You've done enough damage already!" "Don't talk to me about damage!" "You've done more damage than is possible to estimate." "You put more moronic thoughts into this boy's mind..." "It's incredible!" "It's impossible to estimate how great the damage is." "You're pleased, are you?" "You're pleased?" "Yes, I thought you would be." "You've done such a good job." "Marvellous!" "Alvin, I've told you!" "Get those men out of this room!" "Alvin!" "Get them out!" "It's now about 11.30 am and we are outside Steven Shorter Television Station no. 3 situated in a suburb near London." "Late yesterday night a statement was issued by the Steven Shorter Management Group to the effect that Steven Shorter would make a special television appearance today to explain the statement he made during yesterday's banquet." "The crowd are very angry here today because..." "Please keep your distance." "On September 26th with public endorsement..." "Steven Shorter is barred from this and any further appearance on television just to ensure that he does not again misuse his position of privilege to disturb the public peace of mind." "The public knows what it feels." "Its love for Steven has turned to hate." "That we must accept... like an act of God." "What about your business interests in Steven Shorter?" "I'll sever my connections with Steven Shorter Enterprises." "Do you not feel that's rather abrupt?" "Not at all." "My main responsibility is to my investors and I think it would be quite wrong to keep their money in a concern that I now consider to be a bad investment." "Mr. Butler, do you think it's possible that" "Steven Shorter could ever win back his popularity?" "I don't think so." "Perhaps in time to come after he's dead he may be remembered with affectionate nostalgia." "Within about a year all that remained of Steven Shorter were a few old records and a piece of archive film... with the sound, of course, removed." "It's going to be a happy year in Britain this year in the near future."