"The Schoolteacher's Dream (from the film "Welcome Mr. Marshall)" "My fellow Spaniards," "As your Leader, I owe you an explanation." "and this explanation I owe you I'm going to pay." "Because I, as Your Leader, I owe you an explanation." "And this explanation I owe you I'm going to pay." "Now that we're free from the yoke of the Austro-Hungarian Empire, the Americans have come to stay." "The U.S. is a great people, a great power with a great penetrating force." "Let's hear it for the Americans!" "The Leader has just issued a decree that sets down the distribution of the North American aid." "Every school will receive batches of products that come straight from the four cardinal points of the U.S." "Potatos from Idaho." "Corn from Almans..." "Al..." "Arkas from Arkansas." "From... from Alkansas." "Doughnuts!" "Movies from Hollywood," "And from Florida - the most developed and powerful state - powdered milk!" "Very well." "Regarding Florida," "I'd like for us to revise yesterday's lesson about the death penalty," "Because it was right here that this device first began to be used." "Alas, we're nothing, Florentino." "By the way, remind me to inform his parents as they must be worried." "Pepito, what is this ingenious contraption called?" "What?" "What's up?" "You don't remember?" "Nobody remembers?" "Damn!" "Fine then." "Seems we have to revise yesterday's lesson." "Let's start." "If we have a big post with a thick rope..." "And if we have a trap door, which when we open it the prisoner falls down, what do we call it?" " The gallows." " Yes, the gallows." "Be quiet, Garcia Sanchez!" "But what have we here?" "What is this, Fátima?" "A sandwhich." "Hungry, are we?" "Go up to the table!" "Get under there!" "Hunger in the war!" "Stick your head through this hole so you can observe what I'll be doing to your sandwhich." "Let's see..." "Why, it's a sausage!" "And in Lent." "Very well." "You'll now see what I'll do to the sausage." "Did you all get a good look?" "This, my dear children, this is the guillotine." "It's a very ancient execution method." "Maybe the oldest one in existence." "But there's one even more ancient." "Stoning to death." "And stoning is very simple." "Anyone of you can do it when visiting the beach with your parents." "Usually the prisoner, a female in this case, has to keep her head aboveground, while being buried up to her neck." "And let's get one thing straight, the girls in particular, we're not in this world to enjoy ourselves." "Certainly not!" "And we have a clitoris that serves us no purpose." "And if the clitoris serves no purpose, why keep it?" "Cut it off and be done with it." "Case closed." "This is called female circumcision." "And it's a thing of infidels." "So..." "On your marks." "Get set." "Go!" "Well done." "This is the stoning to death." "Is that clear?" "Study hard and memorize this lesson for tomorrow." "And now, does anyone know what this is?" "Nobody knows what it is?" "Let me give you a lead:" "it's made of wood" "And it's a typically Spanish method but no less effective for that." "And very cheap, incidentally." "Get up there!" "Not you, Gutiérrez-Aragón!" "Get back in your place!" "You're pardoned." "If you move away from your desk," "I'll have you shot, like my father did to yours." "Got it?" "Very well." "As you can see it's a wooden pole with a shackle." "It shuts like this." "And a crank, that you turn around many times, putting pressure on the neck until the prisoner is strangled." "Very well." "And this is called the garotte." " Do you know it?" " Yes!" "Oh, really?" "Seems we have a bright one:" "Pepito." "What are you laughing at, Azcona?" "Eh?" "What is so funny, Azcona?" "He's an ignoramus, and all he does is to laugh." "Well, step up to the podium." "Sit down!" "You watch out, Almodóvar!" "As the Leader says in his speeches." "we get a ton of good things from the Americans every day." "The greatest may be that of electricity." "But what is the greatest benefit of electricity?" "The iron." "The light bulb." " The electric chair!" " Yes, indeed." "As it name implies, the electric chair is a chair ...that produces electric charges." "Let's see then." " Any volunteers?" " Me." "Me." "Me." "The electric chair gives the prisoner the chance to repent in his final moments." "Rafael, you have two minutes to say the Apostles' Creed." "It's very important - above all, from the very start - to strap the prisoner firmly into the chair so he cannot escape." "Then, the electrodes are attached to the criminal's thighs." "What are you touching?" "Leave his private parts alone!" "You have one minute for a Hail Mary and another for the Lord's Prayer." "Finally, an electric charge is applied to the brain of the prisoner, which makes him die divinely." "Very well." "Very well, little Azcona." "These are your final moments." "What do you think?" "And this ball corresponds to your last wish." "What do you want before you die?" " Well, I'd like... well, I'd" " Well, you'd like what?" "What do you want?" "Wake up!" "We don't got all day." " I'd like..." "I'd like" " I'm sorry, Azcona" " But your time is up." " No." "Rest in peace." "Now who can that be?" "But what are you doing here, Morales?" "Ms. Eloísa, the Americans." " What is this?" " A refrigerator, absolutely wonderful." "It's a bit chipped from impact..." "They're doing air drops of great appliances free of charge." " How's that?" " A knitting machine." " What are you saying?" " A washing machine, the latest model." " A pressure cooker, even a mule!" " A mule?" "Dear Lord!" "Well, it burst after hitting the ground..." " What a pity." "They didn't drop the bicycle for the kid, though." "Apart from that..." "Let's go!" "No, don't leave yet." "If you don't mind, as you're strong, could you take the little hanged kid away?" "He's been there since yesterday." "Arcadio, Abelardo, go get the kid." "Don't bother about the other ones." "They're more recent." "Frankly, the kid is beginning to smell." "Yes." "Of course." "The kid already knows that." " Well, kids being kids..." " Right." "Mr Morales, now we've got three?" "Do we notify the police?" "The police?" "Can't you see this is a pedagogical issue?" "C'mon, beat it!" "They're just practical exercises for the class." " Miss, look." "Do you know what this is?" "." "Why, it's a Coca Cola, of course." " Have you tried it?" " No, I don't go in for such stuff." " Have some." " No." "Nothing for me." "Open your mouth." "Open it up." "Stick out your tongue." "Come on." "Suck it." "Come on." "It's good stuff." "It's the spark of life." "You like it?" "It's good, right?" "Yes." "I feel..." "I feel something strange." " You have an entire crate here." " Oh, inded." "Mr Morales, don't leave me." "I need you..." "The Coca Cola has penetrated me." "What do I feel?" "What do I feel?" "I've conceived." "I've conceived!" "Oh God!" "Good God!" "I'm pregnant." "And I've got stigmata!" "My God!" "Grant me the privilege of a death by execution." "The cleanest of them all." "The most purifying." "The most redeeming!" "The bonfire!" "My Lord!" "Kids, bring me the coat stand!" "Tie me down!" "I need redemption." "I need my body and the fruit of my sin to be redeemed." "Tie me down well." "I'm pregnant, my Lord." "Morales!" "Morales has been my vehicle to salvation." "Yes!" "Yes!" "And now, set fire to me!" "Thank you, my Lord." "Thank you." "Franco." "Franco." "If we see a big pole with a thick shackle that tightens around your neck until you die." "NO!" "YES!" "It's the garotte." "You've answered well." "Let's play the death penalty again." "And if you are a girl, you shouldn't enjoy yourself" "What's that clitoris for?" "Let's cut it off." "Yes, indeed, female circumcision, as ordered by religion." " And if they throw stones at you?" " It's called stoning to death." "You've answered well." "Let's play the death penalty again." "A very big post with a thick rope, the trap door is opened and you fall down." "I don't know!" "I do!" "It could be the gallows!" "You've answered well." "Let's play the death penalty again." "We have a chair made from wood that gives you electric shocks until you die." "It's the best!" "It's the best!" "The electric chair!" "You've answered well." "Let's play the death penalty again." "Garotte, gallows, stones and electrocution." "Lethal injections, and stoning to death." "Everybody likes, everybody enjoys singing the death penalty song." "Everybody likes, everybody enjoys singing the death penalty song."