"Hang on!" "Man, this guy will not die." "Dude, bust out that new axe." "It's got mad crits." "All right." "That's 40 sashes, so we're done, right?" "No." "We gotta turn these into Stonekeep, and then we're gonna farm Warnorsky the wise, so we can drop his mallet." "He drops freakin' clockwork bear." "Oh, okay." "Well, I kind of have a thing with Jenny soon." "I thought we were hanging out tonight?" "Well, we are." "I mean, we got pizza and fro yo." "We've been playing for like two hours." "Oh, I thought we could just like finish my quest line." "I'm sorry." "I just didn't realize that it was going to be so late." "Yeah, well Warnorsky is a two man raid, so..." "You know, it's fine." "Whatever." "I'll just party with someone else." "Hey, you know what?" "Jenny makes a great monk." "Maybe I can get her to come out." "I don't want you to change your plans." "No, Ted it's all..." "I don't want to be needy!" "Look, I didn't mean that." "Yeah, well..." "Let's get the stonekeep." "Finish the time quest." "Hi." "Need help with anything?" "How can I help you today?" "Anything I can do?" "I mean, it's just if we win tomorrow, we go to play offs." "If we lose, that's it." "The season's over, which is totally possible 'cause Stars Hallow high is crazy good at King of the Hill, and then I would be the VGHS captain that didn't get us to play offs, and you know what?" "I'm rambling..." "I'm gonna just shut up now." "What?" "What's so funny?" "Stop smiling at me, you weirdo." "What are you thinking about?" "That I love you." "Oh, um... that's good to know." "Uh, that's good." "Okay, no." "Now, I'm just thinking about how much I just blew this." "No." "No." "No." "No." "It's fine." "I should just get to bed because we have a big game tomorrow." "I" "I'll see you there, right?" "Jenny, I..." "Bye." "Yeah." "Good luck... to us." "Brian, what the hell?" "Brian?" "Ya in here?" "What is this?" "Hi, yeah, can I get 18 hot wings, family combo meal, and a double chocolate chip cake." "No motorbikes in the drive-thru, sir." "No, I'm gonna eat on my bike." "That's cool." "It's state law, sir." "I can't..." "No!" "No!" "I'm not goning inside." "I'm gonna eat it on my bike." "Sir, you're gonna have to come inside." "Sir?" "You don't understand." "I'm lost!" "Sir, I can't..." "I drove 200 miles thinking about my best friend." "Sir, I can't serve you." "I don't know how to get home." "Sir?" "Oh jeez." "Oh." "Right." "The thing." "Salutations, zoners." "It's the big day, a day like any other crappy big day but bigger because of e-sports." "More like OMG sports!" "I hate you." "Hello there!" "I'm ShotBot 2.0 activated just in time to watch VGHS take on Stars Hallow high in an old school King of the Hill slug fest." "First one to hold the hill for ten minutes wins the game." "Should be exciting, eh, Scott?" "Sure." "I think what you meant to say is "Absolutely!"" "but the real question is will Mary Matrix let The Law play now that he's cleared his name?" "One thing's for sure." "My best friend is gone." "I can be your friend, Scott." "Bouillon!" "What do you say to that, Scott?" "He's gone." "Morning." "Brought you coffee... and a danish but don't tell coach." "Thanks." "So, how are you doing?" "I'm good." "And you?" "Fine." "A little nervous." "Have a strap meeting with coach in a bit." "Big game today so..." "Yeah, big game." "So, how are you doin' with that?" "Get them new plays memorized?" "Jenny, if you don't want to talk about last night, that's fine, but don't come here and pretend it didn't happen, ok?" "Ok." "All right, I gotta go." "You should get to your meeting." "How you feelin' those flapjacks, VGHS?" "You havin' a good bruncheon so far?" "Who ordered blueberry?" "I did." "I know." "I know." "You're all thinking Shane..." "Ted!" "Aren't you going to Brian's game?" "Yeah, I guess." "Maybe I should." "Ki, the cart racers need more syrup." "VGHS is family, and I know around here certain family members get all the attention." "The FPS team!" "But today is about the rest of us, and by the rest of us, I mean the best of us!" "Now, students of VGHS I just have one more question, can you dig in?" "Tacoboy14!" "Come on." "Faster!" "Remember what I taught you in class." "Yeah!" "No!" "Woah, what's going on?" "Theodore, you said you'd be at your friend's FPS tourney." "What giveth?" "You guys are gambling." "You're breaking the rules." "Theodore, we're drifters." "We don't break the rules." "We bend them, and we drift around those bends." "Why don't you go fetch us some sodas?" "I call next." "I'm looking for a boy." "Fourteen." "Loves tacos." "Last seen getting thrashed by me in a lacerated pub server." "Then, running to the mods and calling me a cheater." "I tracked down his IP address to this lame ass school, and I'm not leaving until I take him down." "I'm Tacoboy14." "What?" "Wendell, if the school finds out you've been pubstomping, they'll..." "I know." "They'll throw me out of the fighting team." "I know." "I just..." "Ki, you have to help me." "I don't know how to deal with confrontation." "What was that?" "Yaaa." "Oh no." "No." "Nothing." "I just said that these pancakes..." "They, um, can't handle my massi-cation." "I am Tacboy14." "Interesting." "Did you... want your revenge now?" "Eat first." "Revenge later." "Sit." "Jax rushes to the left with double SMGs, providing you coverage..." "Jax should hang back." "Games should flank left, and then hold tight in that position until we're able to get back..." "That's rookie tactics." "We need to throw everything we have at them." "We need to be aggressive." "Come on, Jenny." "Focus." "Mom, I want to date Brian." "No." "Now, can we get back to this?" "We need to prep for the game." "Let me rephrase that." "I am dating Brian." "Oh." "Well, I've got a game to prep because you two are benched." "No!" "Could you listen to me for one second here?" "I swear, Jenny." "If you're screwing around with me, I..." "He says he loves me!" "I'm not doing this." "Brian means it, mom." "Why won't you listen to me?" "Can you do that for one second?" "I'm not gonna watch you screw up your career." "When we get to the play offs, you're gonna have pro contracts on the table now and when we're so close?" "The sad truth is that guys like Brian they get in the way." "Just like your dad did." "It was hard, ya know." "It was really hard to stand in front of those people and say that I'm the only that gets to call you mom." "You're not a mom." "You were never there for me, and dad, the one that "always got in the way," he was always there for me." "He did everything with me that a mother should do with a daughter." "He taught me how to fix my hair." "He showed me how to talk to boys." "He did everything that you wouldn't do because you weren't around." "So yeah." "Now, you can tell me whether or not I can play, but you cannot tell me who to care about." "I'm dating Brian." "Have fun riding the bench then." "That's your call, coach." "So, you're not Tacoboy 14." "Yes, I am." "Look, I played a lot of Laceration Force." "I think I would know Ki Swan, the daughter of the game's creator, when I see her." "Fine." "I'm Ki, but that doesn't mean..." "And I know you quit the pub circuit two years ago?" "You get bored or something?" "No." "I simply mastered the game." "It wasn't fun anymore." "That is called getting bored, Ki, which is not because Laceration Force rocks." "I've logged 30,000 hours, and I'm still having fun at it." "Jeez, you must get bored at everything." "I do." "Hey!" "We should fight." "Why?" "I don't know." "That's kind of why I wake up every morning." "Why do you get out of bed every morning?" "I don't know." "Tell you what, if I win, you tell me who Tacoboy14 is, and if you win, I'll leave." "What do you say?" "You're bored anyways, right?" "Nice." "You can't win 'em all, loser." "Or any of them." "I'm not done yet." "You've lost to every racer in this room, Ted." "I haven't lost to you." "Be careful, Ted." "And the last time we raced, I almost beat your kingly butt." "Know your place." "Admit it, DK." "You're afraid you're gonna lose." "You're a coward." "Can somebody spot me some cash?" "Oh, I don't race for cash." "I race for cars." "Let's drift!" "The little JV team that could." "What about your crap." "You're not underdogs." "You're VGHS." "Winning is what you do." "Victory is your business, so go out there and do your jobs." "Jax, Rapunzel, up the ravine." "Games, Moriari, cover the middle." "Brian and Jenny take point." "Sign 'em off, captain." "Let's go!" "Go!" "Where is everybody?" "They're all dead!" "It's been seven minutes." "We need to take the hill now!" "Grenade!" "Run!" "Law, you're up." "Please tell me you've been practicing." "I'm probably going to throw up again." "Ki wins." "Round two." "Fight!" "Where the hell have you been?" "We've been pinned down." "Guys, I've got this." "Just give me thirty seconds." "For ShotBot!" "Go!" "Rusty, Ki." "Or were you just never that good." "Ronan wins." "Flawless victory." "Final round." "Where are they?" "It's been two minutes." "Just stay sharp." "Remember no responds." "You good?" "Games," "Oh, sorry." "Door!" "Five minutes." "We can do this." "It's just the three of us." "I'll hold down the fort." "You two get 'em on the the way out." "Thinkin' what I'm thinkin'?" "I'm a chess master, D. I was thinkin' what you were thinkin' 10 thinks ago." "Now, get up that hill." "I've got like no life left." "Get in." "Fourty seconds." "They're gonna be on us at once." "Thanks for the coffee." "Hey, do you remember when we first met?" "Yeah, you were dueling in the quad." "You..." "Wait a minute." "How many guys did you beat that day?" "God, Cold Turkey was like the 12th." "Well, then six should be no problem." "You know, I wanted to fight you, but you got all welcome buddy on me." "Yeah, of course." "I didn't want to take you on." "You're Jenny Matrix." "Why do you get out of bed every morning?" "I don't know." "Jeez, you must get bored of everything." "Ki, you have to help me." "I don't know how to deal with confrontation." "I am Tacoboy14." "Help me, Ki!" "Thanks again, Ki." "I have no idea what I ever saw in that guy." "Thanks Ki." "You're welcome, Wendell." "I just want to say I appreciate it." "Thanks for the pep talk, Ki." "I'm glad I could help." "Oh, sorry." "I'm so sorry." "I'm..." "I'm so lost right now." "Do you know where Calhoun's office is?" "Yes, I do!" "Let me show you." "I'm Ki Swan. 1,360 points." "Fighter." "Brian." "Good to meet you, Ki." "Thanks for your help." "Why don't you go fetch us some sodas?" "I always hated you Ted." "No good loser for a son." "It's only for super serious racers." "This loser is the idiot." "You can't win 'em all, loser." "Or any of them." "Ted stays where he belongs!" "In my shadow!" "Wow, Ted, be more needy." "Total laceration." "Ki wins." "Ki!" "Yeah, Ted!" "Ki!" "All right, everybody." "Calm down." "Calm down." "Calm down!" "Wow." "Ki Swan, right?" "Who knew?" "You know I see students with dreams and untapped potential like Ki here everyday, and I want to help in a way that I know students like Ki so desperately need." "I mean, being head RA, it's cool and all, but it didn't give me the ability to help everybody." "And that's why I, Shane Stuffed Crust Pizza, am formally announcing my candidacy for student body president of VGHS." "Yeah!" "Right?" "And so am I!" "That's right." "I'm runnig for student president, too." "Me." "Ki Swan." "And Wendell Brixby is my running mate." "What?" "That is if you want to be." "You will regret you were born." "What?" "Ki and Wendell, everybody!" "That's going to be interesting." "I'll see you at the polls." "Ki!" "Wow." "I'll see you at practice, coach?" "Screw that." "I'll see you both at dinner." "Tonight." "And Brian, do somethin' about that hair." "What's wrong with my hair?" "What?" "The part?" "Law!" "I'm captain Ashley Barnstormer the third from Nepalm Energy Drink high." "Gotta admit." "A month ago we thought you were cooked." "I guess that dough just needed a little time to rise, but it's clear." "You don't belong here." "Let's say you ditch this team of square pegs and suit up with a crew of round holes." "Let me tell you something, Ashley." "I made my name here at VGHS." "I forged it like a piece of hot metal in the embers of triumph and tragedy." "This place flows through my veins like blood." "So, to answer your question, yes," "I won't sign any contract." "except yours!" "Let's hanglide out of this loser emporium." "See you at play offs, shitheads!" "Boom!" "Ted!" "I'm running for school president." "Wendell's my running mate, but you'll be first boyfriend if I win." "You're awesome, Ki." "You're awesome, too, Ted." "Hey, let's talk some campaign strategy... over pizza." "Yes!" "This sounds like a really good idea." "Okay, so what's you slogan gonna be?" "Okay, so I was thinking "Ki, the logical vote!"" "Okay, that's cool but boring." "I'm gonna say "Ki, the pizza vote!" "A vote for me is a vote for pizza!"" "Oh man, am I glad we didn't lose that one." "That would have been a terrible ending." "Jenny, you're awesome." "Thanks." "Let's go get some food." "Some protein?" "Yes!" "Ok." "Psych!" "We should still go." "Bye, you guys!" "So, pretty close out there." "Good thing I stepped in and saved your bacon." "Oh please." "I could have handled them on my own." "No problem." "Well, yeah, but I bet you're glad you didn't have to." "About last night?" "Ditto." "Are you kidding me?" "I love you." "Hey Ted!" "Dude, I gotta tell ya..." "Ted?"