"leverage s01ep04" "DO YOU KNOW THE SPEECH?" "I KNOW THE GIST OF IT." "YOU MEMORIZE ENTIRE HOMILIES." "HOMILIES ARE POETRY." "A PLEA BEFORE THE CITY COUNCIL IS DEMEANING." "ESTEEMED COUNCILMEN," "IN A FEW DAYS, ST." "NICHOLAS CHURCH WILL BE TORN DOWN." "I HAVE COME BEFORE YOU FOR THE FOURTH TIME" "TO BEG FOR YOUR CONDESCENSION " "CONSIDERATION." "WHICH YOU HAVE NEVER SHOWN BEFORE." "TO BLOCK THE SALE OF THE CHURCH." "BECAUSE WE'RE NOT JUST LOSING A BUILDING," "WE'RE LOSING A SACRAMENT." "THE COMMUNION WITH OUR NEIGHBORS IS OUR MASS." "NOT BAD, HUH?" "help!" "somebody help!" "somebody, please!" "FATHER PAUL!" "help, oh?" "we need a?" "leverage headquarters" "HEY." "SOPHIE'S HERE." "MAN, WHAT DO I TELL HER?" "ANYTHING BUT THE TRUTH." " HEY." " HEY!" "THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING TO MY PLAY LAST NIGHT." "LAST NIGHT WAS AWESOME." "THANKS, PARKER." "YEAH, IT WAS LIKE A HORROR MOVIE." ""ATTENTION MUST BE PAID!"" "OH." "YEAH, I MEAN, YOU'RE NOT THE FIRST PERSON" "I WOULD THINK OF TO PLAY WILLY LOMAN," "BUT YOU " " YOU WORKED IT OUT." "Yeah." "OH!" "THAT WAS THE WORST NIGHT OF MY LIFE." "COME ON, MAN, YOU'VE BEEN IN WORSE SITUATIONS." "HA HA HA!" "NO." "NO, THAT WAS THE WORST." "MM!" "HOW GREAT WERE YOU?" "I MEAN, THEY OUGHT TO CALL IT," "UH, "DEATH OF A SALESWOMAN."" "WHAT A GREAT COMMENTARY ON THE GLASS CEILING FOR WOMEN IN CORPORATE AMERICA." "NATE, I-I PLAYED THE PART AS A MAN." "YES." "AND BRILLIANTLY." "THANKS." "YEAH, I MEAN, YOU WERE " " HUH?" "HOLD ON." "I HAVE TO, UH..." "OH." "HI." "MAGGIE?" "is everything okay?" "WHO'S MAGGIE?" "NATE'S EX-WIFE." "HEY." "IF I THOUGHT I'D GETYOUTO VISIT," "I'D HAVE GOTTEN MY RIBS KICKED IN A LITTLE SOONER." "HOW YOU DOIN', PAUL?" "I GOT MY SHOTS IN." "I POPPED THE FIRST GUY IN THE SHOULDER BEFORE I BLACKED OUT." "YEAH." "I KNOW." "I " " I READ THE POLICE REPORT." "YOU READ THE POLICE REPORT?" "I DO THAT." "YOU TALK TO MAGGIE?" "DO YOU THINK IT WAS A COINCIDENCE" "THAT YOU GOT ATTACKED ON YOUR WAY TO BEG THE CITY COUNCIL TO SAVE YOUR CHURCH?" "NO, I DON'T." "YOU TALK TO MAGGIE A LOT?" "yeah, WHEN IS THE SALE FINAL..." "ON THE CHURCH?" "ESCROW CLOSES MONDAY." "WHY?" "CODE BLUE." "PEDIATRICS." "CODE BLUE." "I KNOW HOSPITALS ARE TOUGH FOR YOU." "PAUL, HAVE YOU TRIED LEGAL ACTION?" "I MEAN, MAYBE AN INJUNCTION " "WITH WHAT MONEY?" "I THOUGHT IT WAS GOD'S PLAN FOR ME TO SAVE THE CHURCH, NATE." "I WAS WRONG." "BUT WE'RE GONNA HAVE ONE LAST MASS ON SUNDAY," "AND I PLAN TO MAKE THE MOST OF IT." "YOU SHOULD BE THERE." "IT'S NOT GONNA BE YOUR LAST MASS, PAUL." "HEY, WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?" "NATE?" "JUST..." "MOVE GOD'S... plans along." "THAT'S ST." "NICHOLAS?" "YES." "SANTA CLAUS HAS A CHURCH?" "HE'S NOT SANTA CLAUS." "I KNOW THIS IS NOT OUR USUAL KIND OF CASE." "I REALI" " BUT BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING," "PAUL IS AN OLD FRIEND OF MINE," "AND HE HAS HELPED THE POOR PARISHES " " NATE." "NATE, NATE." " MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER " "WE'RE TAKING THE CASE." " OH." " YEAH." "OH." "GREAT." "GOOD." "OH." "ALL RIGHT." "WELL, UH, THIS IS OBVIOUSLY A STRONG-ARM MANEUVER" "THAT'S HAPPENED HERE " "GET RID OF THE ACTIVIST PRIEST" "AND THE SALE CLOSES ON MONDAY." "DO WE KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHO BOUGHT THE CHURCH?" "THE SIGN OUTSIDE SAID IT WAS SOLD TO CANNITY CORP." "NOW, CANNITY CORP IS A WHOLLY OWNED SUBSIDIARY OF STB INTERNATIONAL," "WHICH IS A PARENT COMPANY OF AKAI DIVERSIFIED," "WHICH IS THE U.S. SUBSIDIARY OF CANNITY CORP." "THAT IS A LOT OF TROUBLE TO GO TO FOR BUYING AN OLD CHURCH." "YEAH, SO, CANNITY CORP -- THAT'S OBVIOUSLY THE FRONT." "PARKER, CHECK ALL THE ADDRESSES FOR THE REALTY COMPANIES." "ELIOT, HARDISON " " FIND THE LOCAL TALENT THAT ATTACKED PAUL." "UM, HE MESSED UP ONE OF THEIR SHOULDERS, IF THAT HELPS." " SO..." " NO, NO." " LET'S GO, COME ON." " I DON'T DO GANGS." "COME ON." "WE GOT SOME FRESH AIR." "GET OFF THE COMPUTER." " I RAPPEL." " COME ON!" "DID NO ONE SEE ME RAPPEL?" "OH, I HEARD ABOUT IT." "YOU GONNA BE OKAY?" "HE'S AN OLD FRIEND." "I OWE HIM." "YOU THINK THAT WE JUST GONNA WALK INTO SOME RANDOM TUNNEL" "AND FIND SOME CHOLOS JUST ALL YOKED UP?" " YOU KNOW?" " HARDISON " ""YO, HOLMES, LET ME FIX..."" " DUDE, - ?" "QUIET." "LISTEN." "BOYS." "WE DON'T WANT ANY TROUBLE." "ALL RIGHT?" "WE JUST WANT SOME ANSWERS." "HOW'S THIS ANSWER?" "GENTLEMEN..." "I'M ASKING ON ONE OF YOUR COLLEAGUES," "SOMEBODY WHO ROLLED A PRIEST." "WHO WAS IT?" "YOU SEEING THIS, HARDISON?" "THE--THE SITUATION HAS MY ATTENTION, YES." "YOU SEE, THAT'S WHY I DON'T LIKE GUNS." "THEY HAVE A SPECIFIC RANGE OF EFFICACY." "SEE, MOST GUYS MAKE ONE MISTAKE." "THEY GET TOO CLOSE." "WHO ROLLED..." "A PRIEST?" "WE DIDN'T BEAT UP NO PRIEST." "WE ARE NOT ?" "." "DISLOCATED SHOULDER'S A BITCH." "PRIEST GAVE HIM THAT." "YOU BEAT UP A PRIEST?" "DO YOU MIND?" "BE MY GUEST." "YOU GOT A LONG PENANCE AHEAD OF YOU." "START BY ANSWERING THE MAN'S QUESTIONS." "NOW!" "WHO HIRED YOU?" "I DON'T KNOW." "I GOT A CALL ON MY CELL WITH AN OFFER," "AND I CALLED HIM BACK AFTER THE JOB WAS DONE." "HE PAID ME." "THAT'S ALL I KNOW." "I SWEAR." "YOU GOT A NUMBER?" "CAN YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THAT?" "SEVEN DIGITS." "I COULD FIND YOU ON MARS." "GENTLEMEN, WE'LL LEAVE YOU TO YOUR INTERNAL AFFAIRS." "COME ON." "HOW 'BOUT THAT?" "MAN, YOU " " YOU SEE ME?" "HE WAS INJURED." "WELL, SOMEBODY GOT TO FIGHT THE INJURED." "SHOOT, THAT'S MY NICHE." "?" "TRACE ON THE GANGBANGER'S CALL," "IT ROUTED THROUGH THIS DUDE'S NUMBER FROM A PAY PHONE." "SO WE GOT NOTHING." "HOLD ON." "HOLD ON." "THE PAY PHONE IS LOCATED HERE " "THE RESIDENCES AT 8th." "LUXURY CONDOS BROUGHT TO YOU BY ANDREW GRANT." "YEAH, I KNOW THIS GUY." "HE BUILT THE MEADOW MALL ON THE WEST SIDE " "YOU KNOW, THE ONE WITH THE MONORAIL." "NOW, THIS GUY DOESN'T HAPPEN TO OWN ANY OF THE SHELL COMPANIES" "THAT BOUGHT THE CHURCH, DOES HE?" "WELL, I " " I CAN'T PROVE THAT," "BUT " "LET'S JUST PUT IT THIS WAY " "THOSE SHELL COMPANIES HAVE THEIR DADDY'S LYIN' EYES." "ALL RIGHT, WHAT DO WE KNOW ABOUT THIS GRANT GUY?" "WELL, THE MAN'S A MEDIA WHORE." "HE WENT THROUGH LIKE NINE PUBLICISTS LAST YEAR ALONE." "HE'S, UH, CUTTING THE RIBBON ON THIS PLACE TOMORROW." "ALSO, GRANT SURVIVED A HELICOPTER CRASH LAST YEAR." "CHECKED OUT HIS PHARMACY ACCOUNT." "THE MAN POPS ANTIANXIETY PILLS LIKE PEZ." "WELL..." "PUBLICISTS ARE LIKE PRIESTS." "YOU GOT TO TELL THEM ALL YOUR SECRETS." "SO THAT'S OUR WAY IN." "THE QUESTION IS " " HOW?" "WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?" "IF THIS GUY BEAT UP A PRIEST WE'RE NOT GOING EASY ON HIM." "I GOT A DOZEN REPORTERS WAITING FOR ME DOWNSTAIRS," "AND THE BACKDROP FOR MY RIBBON CUTTING ISSCAFFOLDING?" "IT WAS A MISCOMMUNICATION." "ISN'T THAT WHAT I PAY YOU FOR, TOMAS?" "TO COMMUNICATE?" "STOP SCREWING UP." "MR. GRANT?" "KRISTI CONNELLY." "I'M A REPORTER WITHTHE LEDGER." "I WAS WONDERING IF I COULD ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS." "MISS CONNELLY, I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU GOT UP HERE," "BUT THE PRESS CONFERENCE IS DOWN IN THE LOBBY." " IT STARTS IN 10 MINUTES." " NO, NO, I UNDERSTAND." "I JUST WONDERED IF I COULD HAVE A MOMENT " " WHERE'S THE FOREMAN?" "!" " OF YOUR TIME." "FRANCO!" "WILLY WONKA'S HERE." "GOOD." "HIS RIDE'S ALMOST HERE." "OKAY..." "SHOWTIME." "ALL RIGHT, DID YOU REMBER THE BIG SCISSORS THIS TIME?" "DID YOU REMEMBER 'EM?" "OH, OH!" " OH." "OH, MY GOD!" "ARE YOU OKAY?" "YEAH." "YEAH, YEAH, YEAH." " I'M SO SORRY!" " ?" " I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT." " THAT'S OK." "THAT'S ALL RIGHT." "JUST BE MORE CAREFUL NEXT TIME." "OKAY." " OH, MY GOD." " I'M SO SORRY." "I'M SORRY, MAN." "I APOLOGIZE ABOUT THAT." "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" "!" "I HAD A LOT OF TEQUILA LAST NIGHT." "I'M SORRY." "WATCH YOUR FOCUS, CUERVO." "ALL RIGHT?" "I FEEL REALLY BAD." "YOU KNOW WHAT?" "FEEL BAD, ALL RIGHT?" " JUST GET BACK TO WORK." " OH, THANKS." "Capture:" "FRM@Evelyn~zx Sync:" "FRS@Ê¥µ®¿ìÀÖ" "OH!" "OH." "OH, I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" "THEY'RE FIXING UP THIS LIFT, RIGHT?" "THERE'S PROBABLY A FEW BUGS TO WORK OUT." "UNACCEPTABLE." "I'M CALLING THE CONTRACTOR." "OH, SERIOUSLY?" "NO SIGNAL?" "OHH!" "OKAY." "THAT'S..." "WEIRD." "YEAH." "I'M NOT CRAZY ABOUT HEIGHTS." "OR ENCLOSED SPACES." "WHAT IS THAT YOU JUST TOOK?" "XANAX." "For my nerves." "ACTUALLY, CAFFEINE." "WITH A DASH OF DEXTROAMPHETAMINE." "?" "ARE YOU GETTING ANY AIR AT ALL DOWN THERE?" "GOD, I THINK THEY'VE SUCKED ALL THE OXYGEN OUT OF HERE." "THEY'RE TORTURING ME." "IT'S LIKE THE WITCHES' OVEN IN "HANSEL AND GRETEL" OR SOMETHING." "THEY'RE JUST ROASTING US LIKE A TURKEY!" "YOU GAVE HIM SPEED?" "HE BEAT UP A PRIEST." "GET ME OUT OF HERE!" "?" "CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME?" "I'M GONNA FIRE EVERY ONE OF YOU!" "EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!" "YOU ARE SO FIRED!" "MR. GRANT." "IS ANYBODY EVEN LISTENING?" " MR. GRANT." " WHAT?" "THE PRESS." "THEY'RE STILL DOWN THERE." "WE'VE ONLY BEEN UP HERE FOR HALF AN HOUR." "OH, GOD." "OH, GOD." "OH, THEY'RE GONNA HAVE A FIELD DAY WITH ME." " I MEAN, LOOK AT ME." " SEND US HOME." "OH!" "SEE?" "NO." "NO, NO, NO, NO." "I CAN'T, I CAN'T " "COME ON." "YOU'VE GOT TO STAND UP AND PICK ME UP." "YES." "YES, TRUST ME." " COME ON." "TRUST ME." " WHAT?" "TRUST ME." "AND PICK ME UP." "SOMEONE?" "?" "SHE FAINTED!" "SHE FAINTED!" "SHE FAINTED!" "COME ON!" "COME ON!" "MOVE OUT OF THE WAY, WOULD YA?" "THIS WOMAN NEEDS MEDICAL ATTENTION!" "OKAY, COME ON." "COME ON!" "COME ON." "YOU'LL BE OKAY." "STAY WITH ME, SWEETHEART." "STAY WITH ME." "STAY WITH ME." "GET SOME " " WOULD YOU --?" "OKAY." "OKAY, OKAY, SWEETHEART." "OKAY." "YOU'LL BE OKAY." "MISS CONNELLY, YOU JUST GOT YOURSELF AN INTERVIEW." "OKAY, BACK OFF!" "NO MORE PICTURES, OKAY?" "SO, UM, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY HAS BEEN THE KEY TO YOUR, UM " "OH, THANKS." "METEORIC RISE?" "HUH?" "AN APPETITE FOR RISK?" "HARD WORK?" "A BIT OF LUCK HERE AND THERE?" "THIS INTERVIEW IS OVER." "I'M SORRY?" "KRISTI." "HOW DID YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO IN THERE?" "OH, THAT." "I'M A REPORTER." "YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND," "REPORTERS, WE'RE LAZY BY NATURE." "ALL WE WANT IS A STORY, A NARRATIVE." "AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE STORY THEY'RE WRITING," "JUST GIVE THEM A NEW ONE." "THEY'LL THANK YOU FOR IT." "I DON'T WANT YOU TO DO A STORY ON ME." "I DON'T UNDERSTAND." "I WANT YOU TO MAKE SURE EVERYONEELSE IS DOING A STORY ON ME." "I SAW THE WAY YOU HANDLED THE PRESS BACK THERE." "I WANT YOU TO BE MY NEW PUBLICIST." "I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY," "EXCEPT..." "WHEN CAN I START?" "!" "HOW 'BOUT TOMORROW?" "OF COURSE IF I'M GONNA BE YOUR PUBLICIST, ANDY?" "I'M GONNA NEED COMPLETE ACCESS TO YOUR BUSINESS." "THERE CAN'T BE ANY SECRETS BETWEEN US." "NONE." "LET ME SHOW YOU SOMETHING." "HE'S BUILDING ANOTHER MALL ON THE SITE OF THE CHURCH." "IT'S NOT EVEN A MALL." "IT'S A BLOODY "LIFESTYLE" CENTER." "EAT, WORK, SHOP, PLAY, ALL IN ONE PLACE." "I DON'T LIKE THIS GUY." "I HATE HIM." "HE DOESN'T WANT THE CLOSING OF THE CHURCH CONNECTED TO HIM?" "I'LL BET HE'S GOT THE CITY COUNCIL IN HIS POCKET" "AND GOT THE LAND FOR A SONG." "ONCE THIS DEAL CLOSES, HE'S FREE AND CLEAR." "BY THE TIME THEY BREAK GROUND ON THIS MALL," " HE'LL BE UNTOUCHABLE." " FORGET ST." "NICK." "WE'D BE BETTER OFF WITH THE PATRON SAINT OF LOST CAUSES." "NO, NO, NO." "HE TRUSTS YOU." "YOU CAN HOOK HIM." "YEAH, I KNOW I CAN, NATE, BUT THERE'S NO TIME." "I MEAN, WE NEED A LONG CON FOR THIS JOB." "RIGHT?" "IN THREE DAYS, HE OWNS THAT CHURCH." "SO WE GOT TO HIT HIM HARD NOW, INDIRECTLY." "YOU KNOW, STALL THE CLOSING." "AND BUY ENOUGH TIME TO BRING HIM IN FOR A LONGER GAME." "YOU REALLY THINK HE'S GONNA FALL FOR THAT?" "THIS GUY?" "I GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU " "WE'RE GONNA NEED A MIRACLE TO SAVE THIS CHURCH." "SO LET'S, UH, GO STEAL OURSELVES A MIRACLE." "WHEN THAT CHURCH MIRACLE AS THE WORK OF GOD?" "," "USUALLY THROUGH THE PRAYERS AND INTERCESSIONS OF A SAINT," "FOR SOME SPECIFIC PURPOSE," "FREQUENTLY THE CONVERSION OF THE UNBELIEVING." "HOW DO YOU KNOW ALL THIS STUFF?" "I WENT TO SCHOOL WITH FATHER PAUL." "TO, UH..." "SEMINARY SCHOOL." "SO YOU DROPPED OUT OF PRIEST SCHOOL TO BECOME A " "AN INSURANCE COP?" "AND NOW YOU'RE THE LEADER OF A BAND OF THIEVES." "NICE." "YOU'RE A CATHOLIC WHO WANTS TO FAKE A MIRACLE." "I'M PRETTY SURE THAT PUTS US IN MORAL-SIN TERRITORY." "SO NOW YOU'RE RELIGIOUS, TOO?" "NO, NO, I'M NOT DENOMINATIONAL." "IT'S JUST, I NEVER DO ANYTHING MY NANA SAID "DON'T DO."" "THIS, WHAT WE DOIN', IT JUST DON'T SEEM RIGHT." "WHAT DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT?" "LET ME GET THIS STRAIGHT." "WE'RE TRYING TO SAVE A CHURCH, RIGHT?" "SO, FAKING A MIRACLE, TO ME, SEEMS LIKE THE QUICKEST WAY TO DO THAT." "EVEN ANDREW GRANT'S NOT GONNA BUILD A MALL ON A HOLY SITE." "RIGHT, SO WE NEED THREE THINGS." "WE NEED A MIRACLE, WE NEED PUBLICITY," "AND WE NEED TO KEEP FATHER PAUL OUT OF THE WAY." "HE CAN'T BE INVOLVED IN THIS AT ALL." "REPORTERS FOLLOW GRANT AROUND IN PACKS." "LET'S " " LET'S USE HIM AS BAIT." "USE HIS OWN PUBLICITY TO WRECK HIS PROJECT." "THAT'S ELEGANT." "OKAY." "PARKER, WE NEED YOU TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL" "AND KEEP FATHER PAUL THERE NO MATTER WHAT " " UP TO A POINT." "BUT KEEP HIM IN THE HOSPITAL." "ELIOT, YOU'RE THE RETRIEVAL SPECIALIST." "GIVE HARDISON ANYTHING HE NEEDS." "AS LONG AS I DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING IMMORAL." "AH, ABSOLUTELY NOT." "NO, I JUST NEED YOU TO FIGURE OUT," "YOU KNOW, HOW TO FAKE A MIRACLE." "WE ALL GOING TO HELL." "YOU KNOW I'M GETTING OUT OF HERE IN A COUPLE HOURS." "YEAH, IT'S JUST A FEW LAST TESTS TO BE ON THE SAFE SIDE." "YOU LEAKED THIS?" "They're calling for his head." "IT'S A P.R. NIGHTMARE." "TRUST ME, HE'S RATTLED, VULNERABLE " "AWW, JUST RIGHT FOR ME TO KISS AND MAKE BOO-BOO BETTER." "HE'LL BE A MINUTE." "IT'S BUSY TODAY." "IT CERTAINLY IS." "SO, WHAT'S YOUR TAKE ON ALL OF THIS?" "THE NEW MALL?" "I MEAN LIFESTYLE CENTER?" "WE'RE BUILDING RIGHT AROUND WHERE I GREW UP." "I FIGURED IT WOULD SWEEP OUT THE GANGS." "GOOD ON YA." "YOU'RE A COMPANY MAN." "YES ?" "THANK YOU FOR YOUR OPINION." "OK, I JUST RECEIVED A THREATENING PHONE CALL " "FROM A NUN!" "WELL, MR. GRANT, THE PROBLEM IS THE REPORTERS HAVE THEIR STORY." "YEAH, "ANDREW GRANT, NEIGHBORHOOD WRECKER."" "LIKE THERE'S EVEN A NEIGHBORHOOD THERE." "IT'S A BUNCH OF LOSERS AND BURNT-OUT BUILDINGS." "THE PROBLEM IS, THEY HAVE THE WRONG STORY." "AND WHAT DO WE DO WHEN REPORTERS HAVE THE WRONG STORY?" "GIVE THEM A NEW ONE?" "YOU NEED TO TAKE CONTROL OF THIS." "MAKE AN OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT." "GIVE THEM THE OTHER STORY." "YEAH, SURE." "OF COURSE." "THE CHURCH." "DO IT AT THE CHURCH." "THE CHURCH'S DOORS ARE CLOSING " "AWW " " BOOHOO " "BUT YOU'RE OPENING NEW DOORS." "OPPORTUNITY FOR ALL!" "YES." "YES." "TOMAS?" "WE'LL MAKE THE OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT DOWN ON FIRST!" "HUH?" "CALL EVERY REPORTER IN THE CITY!" "WONDERFUL." "I'LL SET IT UP." "COME ON, COME ON.?" "COME ON, WE?" "GO?" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING, TOMAS?" "I'M COMING, MR GRENT." "ALL RIGHT, FATHER, I GOT YOUR TEST RESULTS RIGHT HERE." "MM. HIGH CHOLESTEROL," "ELEVATED SED RATE." "AND IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE PREGNANT." "I'M GONNA NEED YOU TO STICK AROUND AND RE-TEST." "BEHOLD!" "I HAVE MADE THE STATUES MULTIPLY." "WELL, I GOT TO SAY, IT LOOKS PRETTY GOOD, HARDISON." "I MEAN " " YEAH." "IT'S, UH POLYSTYRENE?" "AMONGST OTHER THINGS." "DON'T EAT IT." "OR BREATHE NEAR IT." "ALL RIGHT." "SHOW US WHAT YOU GOT." "TEST SUBJECT NUMBER ONE." "YEAH, NO, YEAH, I SAID BLEEDING TEARS," "NOT " " NOT BLEEDING EARS." "LOOK, LOOK, LOOK, MAN." "YOU'RE LUCKY, ON THIS DEADLINE," "I DIDN'T GIVE YOU A BAKING SODA VOLCANO." "YEAH, THIS " " THIS IS " "OKAY, WHAT ELSE YOU GOT?" "LOOKS RIDICULOUS." "STIGMATA PAINTBALL GUN." "WELL, NO, NO, NO, NO." "NO." " YEAH." " YEAH." "NOW " " HOW DOES THAT WORK?" "I'VE BEEN PRACTICING." "CHECK ME OUT." "OKAY, HARDISON," "WOULD YOU JUST MAKE THE STATUE CRY WITHOUT MELTING ST." "NICK'S HEAD?" "DON'T MELT SANTA!" " HE'S NOT SANTA!" " HE'S NOT SANTA!" "WHAT ARE YOU, 10 FEET FROM THERE?" "HOW CAN YOU MISS THAT?" " YOU STAND RIGHT HERE." " EVERYBODY CAN'T BE ELIOT." " UNBELIEVABLE." " SHUT UP." "SHUT UP." "GRANT LINED UP?" "UH-HUH." "YEAH, HE'LL BE THERE," "WITH THE PRESS." "OH, UM, I'VE BEEN " "I'VE BEEN MEANING TO ASK YOU." "UH, HOW WAS IT, YOU KNOW, TALKG TO MAGGIE AGAIN?" "UH, GOOD." "YEAH, STRANGE." "GOOD." "YEAH, I STILL FEEL, UH..." "WHAT?" "GUILTY?" "ABOUT SAM?" "NO, NO, NOT THAT." "WELL, YEAH." "I MEAN..." "YEAH, AND OTHER THINGS." "THINGS, BUT..." "YOU NEVER CHEATED ON HER, NATE." "I KNOW." "I KNOW." "TEMPTED." " NO." "NO, YOU WEREN'T." " I WAS." "NOT REALLY." "YOU'VE ALWAYS BEEN THE GOOD GUY." "THAT'S " " THAT'S WHAT MADE IT FUN." "WELL, PART OF WHAT MADE IT FUN BETWEEN US BACK THEN." "BACK THEN." "YEAH." "AND..." "WHAT ABOUT NOW?" "I DON'T KNOW." "WHAT ABOUT NOW?" "THAT'S WHAT WE HAVE TO FIGURE OUT." "BY "WE," UM, I MEAN "YOU" OF COURSE." "OF COURSE." "OF COURSE." "JUST, UM..." "DON'T TAKE TOO LONG." "A LIFESTYLE CENTER TO REVITALIZE THE LIFE OF THIS NEIGHBORHOOD." "A PULSING HEART OF OPPORTUNITY" " AND COMMERCE IN THE CENTER OF THE COMMUNITY." " EVERYBODY, COME QUICKLY!" "YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS!" "IT'S A MIRACLE!" "It's a miracle." "It's a miracle." "I WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT." "NOT TOO BAD." "IT WAS NOTHING, REALLY." "IT'S JUST BASIC CHEMISTRY." "AN OIL POLYMER THAT REACTS WITH A SECONDARY CHEMICAL IN THE CANDLES." "NO CANDLE SMOKE, ABSOLUTELY NO EVIDENCE." "LIGHT A CANDLE." "LOCAL NEWS WILL PICK UP THE EVENT," "GRANT WILL CRAWL BACK INTO HIS HOLE FOR A WHILE," "AND, WELL, AT LEAST FOR THE TIME BEING," "IT WILL STAY OPEN TO THE PUBLIC." "WHOA." "WHOA." "THAT'S A LOT OF PUBLIC." " I'M VERY GOOD." " YEAH." "A LITTLE TOO GOOD." "WHAT DID WE JUST DO?" "THE WEEPING STATUE OF ST." "NICK IS ON YouTube." "GOOD." "THIS CHURCH WILL NEVER SHUT DOWN." "THERE'S JUST SO MANY PEOPLE HERE." "I MEAN, WHAT IF THEY FIND OUT IT'S A...fake?" "HELL FIRE, DAMNATION, ET CETERA." "YOU KNOW WHAT?" "I'M GONNA STEP OVER HERE," "SO WHEN THE GOOD LORD THROWS DOWN ON ALL OF Y'ALL," "I DON'T GET HIT BY THE LIGHTNING." "WASN'T ZEUS THE ONE WITH THE LIGHTNING?" "GUYS, GUYS, THIS IS STILL A BIG WIN." "SOPHIE, UH, FIND OUT WHERE GRANT IS," " AND MAKE SURE HE'S " " WHAT DID YOU DO?" "UH, WHAT " " WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" "WHAT, YOU " " YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?" "THE WORD "MIRACLE" DOES NOT APPEAR ANYWHERE IN THE OLD OR NEW TESTAMENTS." "WHAT ABOUT THE WEDDING AT CANA?" "HUH?" "WHAT ABOUT LAZARUS?" "PLEASE TELL ME YOU HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS." "I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS." "NATE?" "YOU'RE LYING TO ME, RIGHT TO MY FACE." "IN CHURCH!" "There's a fake miracle in my church." "Shh." "YOU KNOW, THERE'S A REASON YOU DIDN'T BECOME A PRIEST." "I DO WHAT I CAN." "YOU CAN'T PLAY GOD, NATE." "JUST TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON," "AND WE'LL TRY TO FIX IT." "PAUL, LISTEN TO ME." "FOR YOUR OWN GOOD, I CAN'T TELL YOU WHAT'S GOING ON HERE." "BUT I CAN TELL YOU..." "THAT I " " THAT I GOT IT COVERED." "THEY'RE IN SPIN MODE." "IT'S A MESS." "I'M GONNA PUT A NAIL IN HIS COFFIN RIGHT NOW." "WELL, MAKE IT 10." "I DON'T WANT THAT SON OF A BITCH CRAWLING OUT." "SO..." "UGH." "ST." "NICHOLAS." "A MIRACLE." "OBVIOUSLY WE CAN'T " "YEAH." "I KNOW." "I'VE BEEN UP ALL NIGHT WITH THIS." "I FIGURED AS MUCH." " I DO HAVE A SPIN ON IT." " NO, NO, NO, FORGET IT." "I'VE KILLED THE AMERICAN TOWN." "THIS MIRACLE " " IT GAVE ME A REAL CRISIS OF CONSCIENCE." "EXCELLENT." "YEAH, THAT'S GOOD!" "WE CAN " " WE CAN WORK WITH THAT." "I LOOKED INTO MY HEART." "I PACED." "I CRIED." "BUT BY DAWN..." "I HAD MY ANSWER." "BIBLETOPIA." "IT'S A THEME PARK?" "AH AH!" "LIFESTYLE AND RECREATION CENTER." "HERE, LET ME GIVE YOU THE TOUR." "SO, THE CHURCH STAYS." "I MEAN, AT LEAST THE STATUE STAYS," "AND MAYBE THAT ONE WALL WITH THE STAINED GLASS." "BUT THE REST " " GONE." "NOW, FLANKING THE STATUE " " TWO FOOD COURTS." "SO, THE ORIGINAL PEWS " "THEY'RE NOW OUTDOORS, FOR MEALTIME SEATING," "HOLY CONTEMPLATION, WHATEVER." "SHOPS APLENTY ON THE PERIMETER." "BUT THIS " "THERE WILL BE A SEA -- AN ACTUAL SEA " "SURROUNDING THE PARK, THAT WILL PART EVERY 30 MINUTES." "HUH?" "AND THEN WHILE PEOPLE ARE WAITING TO COME IN," "THEY CAN ENJOY PREVIEWS, FOOD, AND SOUVENIRS AT THE TEARS OF ST." "NICK CAFee." "COME TO PRAY, STAY TO SHOP." "WE ALSO GOT THESE " "ST." "NICHOLAS BOBBLE-HEADS." "THERE YOU GO." "MM." "YOU'RE SERIOUS ABOUT THIS?" "COME ON, KRISTI." "YOU AND I BOTH KNOW, THIS IS NOT A REAL MIRACLE." ""A," BECAUSE MIRACLES DON'T EXIST," "AND, 2, BECAUSE THIS PAIN-IN-THE-ASS PRIEST WILL DO ANYTHING" "TO KEEP HIS CHURCH OPEN." "BUT, HEY I OWE HIM A DEBT." "I MEAN, I NEVER WOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF" "BIBLETOPIA WITHOUT HIS DIVINE INTERVENTION." "THIS STUPID PRIEST " "HE'S GONNA MAKE ME MILLIONS." "BIBLETOPIA?" "THE MAN CANNOT BE STOPPED!" "IT'S LIKE EVERYTHING WE THROW AT HIM JUST MAKES HIM STRONGER." "KIND OF ADMIRE HIM, THOUGH." "MY NEPHEW WOULD LIKE BIBLETOPIA." "OH, NO, SEE?" "THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU MESS WITH GOD." "HE RAISES UP YOUR ENEMIES WITH HIS RIGHT HAND," "AND HE SMITES YOU WITH HIS LEFT." "NO, NO, NO, NO, NO." "SO I CAN..." "WE CAN USE THIS." "JUST ME A SECOND TO " "I JUST NEED " "APOSTOLIC VISITATION." "COME AGAIN?" "IT'S THE VATICAN." "WHAT?" "APOSTOLIC VISITATION." "IT'S LIKE THE POPE'S CSI." "THEY COME, THEY INVESTIGATE A MIRACLE." "THEY DETERMINE WHETHER IT'S REAL OR A HOAX." "IF THEY FIND OUT THE TRUTH," "THEY'RE GONNA CLOSE THIS CHURCH DOWN," "AND BLAME FATHER PAUL FOR FRAUD." "I DON'T LIKE THIS, NATE." "EVEN GRANT, OKAY?" "HE WAS HOOKED." "ORDINARILY WE'D HAVE HIM" " UNDER CONTROL BY NOW." " WE'LL GET AROUND HIM." "WE'LL SAVE THE CHURCH," " AND WE'LL TAKE OUT GRANT " " YOU SCREWED UP." "YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO UNDO YOUR OWN CON." "GENTLEMEN." "AH!" "FATHER, FATHER!" "EXCUSE " " I AM HAVING JUST BIG SPIRITUAL CRIS." "YOU GUYS COULD UNDERSTAND MORE THAN ANYBODY." "I NEED TO TALK TO YOU RIGHT NOW." "YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE..." "I hope you weren't gonna do what I know you were just about to do." "What, tell the truth?" "You bet I was." "Nate, no more lies!" "The Vatican's here!" "You and I both know what that means." "Yeah, break out the grappa." "DOES MY GETTING DEFROCKED AMUSE YOU?" "NO, Listen, just let me explain this to you, okay?" "I just -- this is " "In here." "OH, THERE'S ALWAYS A LOOPHOLE WITH YOU." "That's my side!" "?" "?" "I GET IMMUNITY, OF COURSE." "NOTHING I SAY CAN BE REPEATED TO ANYONE," "NOR IS IT ADMISSIBLE IN A COURT OF LAW." "START IT RIGHT." "SO, THE STATUE." "BLESS ME, FATHER..." ""UH, BLESS ME, FATHER, FOR I HAVE SINNED."" "IT HAS BEEN " ""IT'S BEEN 2 YEARS, 3 MONTHS," "AND 15 DAYS SINCE MY LAST CONFESSION."" "I WAS AT THE FUNERAL." "SO, THE STATUE " " WE FAKED A MIRACLE." " I KNOW." "NOW, I HAD NO IDEA THAT IT WOULD GET AS MUCH ATTENTION " "AS AND GRANT " "THAT HE WOULD TURN AROUND" "AND HE WOULD TRY TO PROFIT FROM IT." ""I HAVE COMMITTED A STRING OF SELFISH" "AND HURTFUL ACTS..." "FATHER."" "WRONG ACTS, RIGHT REASONS." "OH, THE ENDS JUSTIFY THE MEANS?" "IS THAT IT, NATE?" "IS THAT IT?" "THE DETAILS." "GOD LOOKS AT HOW WE DO A THING," "AND HE JUDGES." "HEY, I'M OUT HERE HELPING PEOPLE." " I MEAN THAT..." " ARE YOU?" "OR ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF?" "MAYBE TAKE A COUPLE OF BAD GUYS DOWN WITH YOU." "I AM TRYING TO SAVE YOUR DAMN CHURCH." "SAVE MY CHURCH?" "YOU FAKED A MIRACLE!" "MY PARISHIONERS, MY FLOCK, MY CHURCH " "THEY " " THEY BELIEVED IN THAT MIRACLE." "AND NOW YOU ARE RIPPING OUT THAT FAITH" "AND REPLACING IT WITH A LIE." "MAYBE " " MAYBE I'M NOT HERE TO SAVE THIS CHURCH, NATE." "MAYBE I NEED TO LOSE THIS CHURCH TO SAVE YOU." "GO AND SIN NO MORE." "EXCUSE ME." "ANDY, UM," "THERE'S A BIT OF TROUBLE." "NOTHING ALARMING." "IT'S JUST, UM..." "THE VATICAN'S HERE." "I KNOW." "ISN'T IT GREAT?" "GREAT?" "IF THEY THINK IT'S REAL, WE GO FORWARD WITH BIBLETOPIA." "IF THEY EXPOSE IT WELL," "THEN I GET GOOD PRESS FOR CLOSING THIS FRAUD PARISH." "YOU SEE, WHEN PEOPLE SAY "CONTROVERSY,"" "I HEAR "ATTENTION."" " ANDY..." " HUH?" "YOU ARE SHAMELESS." "OH, GOD, YOU GET ME SO WELL." "HEY, COME ON, GET A PICTURE WITH THESE GUYS." "?" "?" "?" "IT'S GOOD?" "?" "?" "WITH YOU GUYS." "?" "I'M GOING TO CONFESSION." "I'M RIGHT BEHIND YOU." "THAT'S GREAT." "AS SOON AS THAT VAN FULL OF VATICAN CSI EQUIPMENT GETS HERE, WE'RE SCREWED." "THAT'S WHAT I WAS TRYING TO SAY," "BUT YOU GUYS WOULDN'T LET ME TALK WHILE WE WERE ALL in the closet!" "IF WE LEAVE IT HERE," "THEY'RE GONNA FIND OUT THE STATUE ISN'T REALLY CRYING" "AND BLAME FATHER PAUL FOR FRAUD." "SOPHIE, IF WE STEAL THE STATUE," "HE'S GONNA GET BLAMED FOR COVERING UP A FRAUD." "HUH." "THIS AIN'T FUNNY." "AS SOON AS THEY RUN A SCAN OR A PH STICK OVER THAT STATUE," "THEY'RE GONNA SEE THOSE AREN'T REAL TEARS." "YOU'RE RIGHT." "IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME." "YOU KNOW, FATHER PAUL " "HE CAN'T HELP BUT TELL THE TRUTH." "HE'S GONNA FLIP ON US." "I HOPE THIS IS THE PART WHERE YOU SUGGEST PRAYER." "No, the Weeping Statue of St. Nicholas is not gonna be stolen." "It's gonna miraculously disappear in the middle of tomorrow's mass." "I'M SORRY?" "In front of the priest, the Vatican, the entire congregation." "HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING, NATE?" "HOW MUCH DOES THE STATUE WEIGH?" " ABOUT 900 POUNDS." " GOOD." "I AM SO SORRY, NANA." "THE LORD BE WITH YOU." "AND ALSO WITH YOU." "A READING FROM THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO LUKE." "GLORY TO YOU, LORD." ""A MAN HAD A FIG TREE IN HIS VINEYARD," ""BUT IT DID NOT BEAR FRUIT." ""SO HE SAID TO THE MAN WHO TOOK CARE OF THE VINEYARD," ""'FOR THREE YEARS, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR FRUIT ON THIS TREE," ""'AND FOR THREE YEARS, I'VE FOUND NOTHING." ""IT'S A WASTE OF MY LAND." "CUT IT DOWN!" "'" ""'SIR,' THE WORKER REPLIED," ""'LEAVE IT ALONE FOR ONE MORE YEAR." ""'LET ME DIG AROUND IT AND FERTILIZE IT." ""'IF IT BEARS FRUIT NEXT YEAR," "ALL IS WELL." "IF NOT, THEN CUT IT DOWN.'"" "THE GOSPEL OF THE LORD." "?" "REPENT!" "OR PERISH!" "THAT'S LUKE 13." "TOUGH TO SWALLOW, HUH?" "BUT LIKE ALL PARABLES," "THIS ONE'S OPEN TO INTERPRETATION." "WAS THE WORKER JUST BEING LAZY?" "STALLING?" ""I'LL GET TO IT, BOSS, NEXT YEAR." "MAÃANA."" "OR DID THE WORKER HAVE A SECRET?" "A SECRET " "THAT ONLY OUR FAITH SUSTAINS US OVER TIME." "THE OWNER DOESN'T HAVE HIS HANDS IN THE SOIL." "ONLY THE WORKER IS THERE EVERY DAY IN THE DIRT," "WITH THE TREE." "HE HAS FAITH IN HIS SKILL" "AND FAITH THAT GOD WILL SUPPORT THAT SKILL," "AND MAYBE, IN A YEAR'S TIME," "THE TREE WILL BEAR FRUIT." "HE DOESN'T LOOK FOR THE EASY WAY OUT." "HE DOESN'T SAY," ""OH, WHY WOULD THE LORD DO THIS TO ME?" ""IF ONLY HE WOULD GIVE ME A SIGN." "IF ONLY HE'D GIVE US A MIRACLE."" "BUT THE WORKER DOESN'T ASK FOR A MIRACLE." "HE HAS FAITH IN HIMSELF AND FAITH IN GOD," "AND HE ONLY ASKS FOR TIME." "LET US PROCLAIM OUR FAITH." "WE BELIEVE IN ONE GOD," "THE FATHER, THE ALMIGHTY," "THE MAKER OF HEAVEN AND EARTH," "OF ALL THAT IS SEEN AND UNSEEN." "WE BELIEVE IN ONE LORD, JESUS CHRIST," "THE ONLY SON OF GOD." "ETERNALLY BEGOTTEN OF THE FATHER." "GOD FROM GOD, LIGHT FROM LIGHT," "TRUE GOD FROM TRUE GOD," "BEGOTTEN, NOT MADE, ONE IN BEING WITH THE FATHER." "OK." "THAT'LL DO IT." " WHOA!" " YEAH." "FOR US MEN, FOR OUR SALVATION..." "I SAW WHAT HAPPENED!" "AN ANGEL TOOK IT AWAY!" "CALM DOWN, PEOPLE!" "THAT'S NOT WHAT'S HAPPENING!" "I KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE." "THERE IS NO MIRACLE!" "SOMEBODY STOLE THE STATUE!" "AND I KNOW WHO IT IS!" "ANDREW GRANT." "HEY, THAT'S THE GUY THAT BOUGHT THE CHURCH!" "THAT'S NOT MY VAN!" "WHAT KIND OF MONSTER FAKES A MIRACLE FOR A PROFIT?" " YOU SICKEN ME." " THIEF!" "THE PRIEST IS DESPERATE." "LOOK, HE HID THE STATUE IN THE VAN." "HE FORGED THE REGISTRATION PAPERS TO FRAME ME!" " I DON'T BELIEVE YA!" " LOOK, LOOK, LOOK." "RIGHT HERE." "SEE?" "MY ASSISTANT -- HE WAS WITH ME THE WHOLE TIME." "OKAY?" "NOW, LOOK." "WE BOUGHT THIS PROPERTY " "WE'RE GONNA FIX UP THE NEIGHBORHOOD!" "RIGHT?" "NO." ""NO."" "NO!" "HE GOT THE LAND UNDER THIS CHURCH" "THE SAME WAY HE GOT THE REST OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD," "THE SAME WAY HE GETS ALL OF HIS PROPERTIES " "BY BRIBERY, INTIMIDATION, AND VIOLENCE!" "ANDREW GRANT..." "SENT A BUNCH OF THUGS TO BEAT UP FATHER PAUL!" "IF I GO TO THE POLICE WITH WHAT I HAVE," "I COULD PUT HIM IN JAIL." "AND ME, TOO, PROBABLY." "FATHER..." "WHAT CAN I DO TO MAKE THINGS RIGHT?" "Yes, I HAVE TO DO THE RIGHT THING?" "BIG BULLY!" "?" "?" "OK, GREAT." "GOOD." " OK." " COPS GOT HERE FAST." "IT'S ALMOST AS IF AN INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALIST CALLED THEM WITH A TIP-OFF." "KRISTI, SAVE ME, HUH?" "YOU CAN SPIN THIS, RIGHT?" "INSTEAD OF, UH, "FELONY,"" "MAYBE SOFTEN IT TO, UH, "CONTROVERSY" OR SOMETHING." "YOU KNOW, WHEN YOU SAY "CONTROVERSY,"" "I ALWAYS HEAR "ATTENTION."" "OH!" "ARE YOU EVEN BRITISH?" "!" "?" "TELL HER SOMETING?" "YOU USED ME." "YEAH, WELL..." "YOU USED ME, TOO." "YOU BROKE THE SEAL OF THE CONFESSIONAL" "AND TOLD EVERYONE THE STATUE WAS A FAKE." "TO SAVE THE FAITH OF MY PARISH." "WRONG ACT, RIGHT REASONS." "END JUSTIFY THE MEANS, FATHER?" "I'LL COUNT MYSELF BLESSED AND TAKE MY MIRACLE." "AH, BUT THERE WAS NO MIRACLE." "NATE, FIVE THIEVES SAVED MY CHURCH." "IT WAS GOOD TO SEE YOU, PAUL." "YOU BETTER PLAN ON BEING HERE NEXT SUNDAY." "I'VE GOT A GREAT SERMON ON MAKING AMENDS." "WE'LL SEE." "YOU'LL BE BACK." "I HAVE FAITH IN YOU." "LOOK AT THAT." "SAVED A CHURCH." "IT'S LIKE CHRISTMAS." "SEE?" "I TOLD YOU ST." "NICHOLAS IS SANTA CLAUS." "NO, HE'S NOT, PARKER." "WELL, WHO IS HE, THEN?" "ST." "NICHOLAS IS THE PATRON SAINT OF THIEVES."