"[ thunder crashes ] [laughsevilly] [ sawing ]" "[ electricity crackles ] it'salive!" "[ thunder crashes ] [laughsevilly] [ smooch!" "] [ laughs evilly ] andnowbacktodisney's "gargoyles."" "[scoffs] please stop saying that every" "Time we start to have sex." "honey,comeon ." "We are unattractive people." "I'm just owning it." "findmcclaneandbringmemy  detonators." "unlessyouwantittoget messy out there, I suggest you" "Start organizing trips to the bathroom." "And fyi -- the east bathroom is being redone and only has a" "Urinal." "fine." "[ door opens ] [ hostages scream ] attention." "If you are a male who has to go" "Pee really, really bad, raise your hand and keep it raised." "This is your bathroom pass." "When your group color is called," "You must show the leader your pass before your group can" "Proceed to the bathroom." "If you are a woman who has to go" "Poo, you are in the aqua group." "[ static ] hey,hans,Ijusttook adump in the east bathroom urinal." "regroup!" "Everyone hand back your" "Laminates." "uh,thisis thesourceofthe" "Transmission, but nobody's here." "shoulda coupleof space" "Truckers be making first contact with an alien ship?" "[shouting]sorryit's so messy!" "It's hard to get maid service in space!" "[chuckles] who are you?" "myname'sgordonshumway." "I crash-landed here." "How ironic!" "My ship goes down, my insurance" "Premium goes up!" "[ both laugh ] thatwashilarious." "Maybe we should take him back to" "The nostromo." "ripleyhere." "Quarantine procedure says we are forbidden from bringing any" "Alien life form on board, kane." "thanks,captainparanoidof" "The s.S. "rules"!" "We're bringing this hilarious" "Mother[bleep] aboard." "ooh,niceoutfit,brett." "I didn't know there was a goodwill in space!" "[ laughter ] thisguy'sjokesare obvious." "I want him off the ship." "thecrazycatladywho" "Doesn't want us to have any fun doesn't want us to have any fun?" "I'm gobsmacked." "seriously,brett,Idress" "Better than you, and I'm naked!" "[ laughter ] [coughing,choking] whoa!" "Someone get that guy a tums!" "[ laughter ]" "Ican'tnotlaughatthis guy." "yourfriendjustchokedto death!" "Your shitty jokes are going to kill my crew." "can'tyousee,ripley?" "He's the perfect organism." "His jokes are flawless in structure and delivery." "He nails it every [bleep] time." "butkaneis dead!" "theonlythingthatdied is your interior decorator." "Geesh!" "[ laughter ] [ all choking ]" "What a delicious-looking cat." "Allow me to introduce it to my" "Stomach." "Here, dinner, dinner, dinner." "[ cat yowls ]" "getawayfromher ,you hack!" "anotheroutfitchange?" "!" "What is this -- the oscars?" "Ha!" "I kill me!" "no." "I killyou." "hey,relax!" "Ever hear of decaf?" "That's gonna leave a mark." "Anybody got any bactine?" "justshoutingsomething" "Doesn't make it funny!" "isthisbecauseIdidn 'tuse" "A coaster-r-r-r-r-r?" "!" "[ wind whistling ] justa lizardwizardina" "Blizzard, yo." "Nothing to see here." "muckman,youstayhereand keep April safe." "We'll go after shredder!" "man,shredderandstuff." "Craziness." "yeah." "hey." "Question." "Is there a full banana peel" "Melting into my head right now?" "yes." "thatisunfortunate." "[ loud fart ]" "What the..." "Who did that, man?" "That was probably krang or" "Something." "krangwasneverhere." "It's just us." "nah,thatwasprobablykrang," "I bet." "So nasty!" "That guy, man." "uh,that'simpossible." "I would've seen him." "nah,man." "Nah, he was here." "He blew ass, and then he left." "muckman,I knowyou'relying." "freakingkrang,man." "thereisno waykrangcame" "In, farted for 10 whole seconds, and then left." "I absolutely would've seen that occur." "Look, I don't care!" "You had gas!" "It happens!" "Just please don't blatantly lie to my face!" "cool,man!" "No !" "Cool!" "Absolutely." "I'm sorry." "Cool." "We -- we are cool." "Krang, man." "itwasnotkrang!" "[panting] haveyouseenmysoap ona" "Rope?" "How did I manage to lose it?" "It's on a freakin' rope!" "Ha!" "it'sstillnotevenajoke." "I'mgladwe finallyadmitted we just don't work as roommates." "nowpeoplewillstopsaying we're gay." "ah,thisis mucheasierthan  one of us ever getting a" "Girlfriend." "[ knock on door ]" "Oh, that must be the new roommate." "I found him off craigslist." "um,isthatsafe?" "wherecanIput myspoons?" "Hey, bert?" "Dude, am I waking you up, man?" "Hey." "what?" "!" "youeverputaguninyour" "Mouth, just to get that taste on your tongue?" "no,sam." "hey,bert!" "Bert." "what?" "What?" "!" "doI havebloodinmy" "Mustache, bert?" "oh,isthisanother" "Harebrained scheme like ernie?" "Oh, my god!" "You're shitting in the sink!" "yourtoiletinsultedmy" "Spoons!" "[ mid-tempo music playing ] hey,kids!" "Do you have trouble tying your" "Shoes?" "Well, sam and I have a song" "About it!" "¶ tying your shoes is so much" "Fun ¶ ¶theamericangovernment" "Planned 9/11 ¶ uh...¶ youmaketwo loops" "That look the same ¶ ¶everyoneknowstherewasno" "Second plane ¶ whoops!" "Uh-oh!" "My tooth fell out!" "Guess another angel got his" "Wings." "hey,bert!" "Justwantedto" "Whoa!" "What happened?" "!" "oh,ernie,Itriedtomake" "Sam the new you, but instead, he made me the new smackhead dave!" "oh,bert,Ican cheeryouup." "[ pop ] [ raspy laughs ] hey,I cando that,too ." "[ grunting ] aah!" "Oh,god!" "don'tgo!" "Imust,johnconnor." "To protect the future, I must be destroyed." "wait!" "Of all the abusive fathers that" "Came and went, you -- a-a terminator -- were the only" "Positive influence." "Stay." "Be john's father." "dad?" "affirmative." "youweresupposedtopick me up from school and take me to a" "Dodger game!" "oops!" "Forgot!" "Iorderyounot toforget stuff!" "negative." "A string of neglectful father" "Figures gave you a strong distrust of authority." "That trait led to your role as leader of the resistance and" "Savior of the human race." "So go get me another beer, you" "Piece of shit." "[ can clatters ]" "What are you doing, idiot?" "writinga shortstoryfor" "School." "[ beeping ] wouldyoulikemyreview?" "This is terrible." "You don't write stories again." "You suck at it." "don'tworry!" "Iwon 't!" "[ sobbing ] [ whirring, beeping ] I am drunk!" "[scoffs]goodforyou." "don'tsmokein my house,boy !" "Icando whateverIwant in my room!" "[ beeping ]" "nowyourroomhas nowall ,so it's technically part of my" "House!" "Hasta la vista, butt-nut!" "hehasapoint,john ." "ifwe'regoingtosave this" "Ship, we'll have to tap into the navigation computer and -- winonaryder'son thisship?" "!" "Lock my trailer!" "My ipod's in there!" "Ha!" "Idon'tusuallyget involved in day-to-day operations, so I'm" "Smurfing undercover." "They'll never smurf it's me." "[ chuckles ] ohh, I haven't smurfed these" "Things off in nearly 300 years!" "Talk about crotch rot!" "so,you'remy newintern, huh?" "that'sright,farmersmurf." "Teach me to care about your sad," "Little life " " I mean your noble and fulfilling, uh, career" "Choice." "well,smurfsareathirsty" "Bunch, so we got to smurf them fresh milk every day!" "we'vebeendrinking caterpillar milk?" "!" "Oh, this is agony." "It feels like my hands are gonna" "Smurf off!" "yep,mycarpaltunnelgotso" "Bad, they had to fuse my wrist bones in place!" "butourhealthcareissmurfy, right?" "eh,mydeductibleis2,000 smurfberries." "what?" "!" "[ cash register dings ] dr." "Smurf,whyare  deductibles so high?" "boy,yousmurfalotof uppity questions for an intern." "Uh, just treat the next patient while I go for a jamba-juice run" "In my gold-plated helicopter." "Zoom, zoom." "actually,I 'mnotreally qualified." "I -- [ door opens ] weneeddr ." "Smurf!" "Handy had an accident!" "didsomeonegetasliver?" "Oh, my smurfing god!" "Isawedrightthrougha load-bearing mushroom!" "Half our building materials are fungus!" "Oh, trade school didn't prepare me for this!" "youcansmurfhis fingers, right, nurse?" "I'llcertainlytry." "I'llcertainlytried." "[crying]you can probably stop sewing." "no,no,no ." "I-I'm gonna get this." "So, grouchy smurf, how's the coffee today?" "Ihatecoffee!" "oh!" "Okay." "But how do you like working here?" "Ihateworkinghere." "oh,goodness." "Okay." "Well, is there anything that maybe papa smurf could do?" "Ihatepapasmurf!" "allright,whatexactlydo" "You do around here?" "I,um" " I..." "Hate stuff?" "I'mbeingdeadlyserious." "I..." "I..." "I hate shoveling dog shit." "well,nowthat'sactuallyan" "Appropriate reaction." "Carry on, dog-shit smurf!" "¶ba-bawkbawkbawk¶ ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶" "¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ¶" "¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶ ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶" "¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ¶" "¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶ ¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk ¶" "¶ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ¶" "Ba-gawk!" "Bawk." "hey." "Question." "Is there a full banana peel" "Melting into my head right now?" "yes." "thatisunfortunate." "[ loud fart ]" "What the..." "Who did that, man?"