"My last few days have all started the same." "Saying this to Kim:" "You're amazing." "Then whispering:" "I love you." "to our baby and and hoping that Kim wasn't wondering why I hadn't said the same thing to her." "There is something that just the diven doctors can't stomach." "That is so gross." "I might vomit." "Oh, is that the patient with the infected neck wound?" " Worse." " Hey guys." "Like the image of your ex fiancee." " How's it going, Keith?" " You ruined my life." " See you!" " Excuse me, nurse?" "Could you be a doll and give Bobby Franklin, there, a shot of penicillin?" "Why can't he do it himself?" "Because, Carla, he's Dr. "No shot"." "He's like the only pediatrician kids like because he never give shots." "Hey, remember when you wanted to be the doctor who never said "terminal"?" "I'm sorry but your grandmother has an inoperable brain tumor." "Is it terminal?" "I wouldn't say that..." " So she still has a chance." " No." "Yeah, it's okay." "I mean, Dr. "won't say terminal" has got all the mouthful, anyway." "Didn't I tell you to treat Mr. Meltzer?" "Yes but he won't let us, because..." "No, no." "Remember our new system so that I never have to hear your voice again?" ""He doesn't want to be treated by interns", with your "i" dotted with an heart and a little frowny face at the end." "It's incredible, your handwriting is actually more annoying than your voice." "Regardless, you interns are the future of this hospital, if you don't treat patients, you won't learn." "What you have to do is walk over to Mr. Mellsor and then say these words:" ""I'm your doctor, deal with it"." "Can you say that?" "I'm your doctor..." "Not you, never you." "I am your doctor, deal with it." "Peachy." " Why you looking so sad, now, lifer?" " You were right about Kim, I don't love her." "Oh, that's tough." "Do you wanna get some exercise and clear your head?" " Uh uh!" " Okay." "Thanks, buddy." "I needed this." " are you gonna break up with her?" " No way. we are having a baby, man." "Statistics say that the kids end off way better off if their parents stay toghether even if it's not a great relationship, so..." "I'm in for good." "Plus, Kim is amazing, so..." "Hopefully, one day I'll wake up and just be... hell over hills." "Yeah, that happens a lot." "Hi, guys." " Hi." " Hi." "Is Izzie in the room?" "Turk hadn't checked, so he had a 50/50 shot of answering correctly." "Sleeeping like an angel." "Really?" "Because she's on my back!" "That's unfortunate." "How can you come home and not checking on your own child?" "You know what?" "I'm so sick of this stupid videogame, that's it." "I want that out of that house." "Come on, I just got this thing." "I'm already on the 5th level." "Just let me finish!" " Carla, let him finish!" " Oh, you can have it!" "Family comes first, Turk." "Baby, studies have shown that using joysticks can improve a surgeon sexterity." " You can have this one." " I'm gonna kill you!" "That's my baby pager." "I'm having a baby!" "Oh, my God!" "I'm gonna be a "bluncle"!" " A black uncle." " Oh, right." "You guys, I know when I first brought this happy thought I was cheesy, but now that this actually happening, can we do a three-person celebratory jump hug?" "Pleeeeeeease?" "For you." " Wooooooooh hooooooo!" " Ah ah!" "You' were right, that was cheesy." "Should have listened." "Itasa Scrubs Team Proudly presents" "Scrubs Season 7 Episode 2 "My Hard Labor" VO subtitles" "Transcript:" "JDsClone, Teorouge, Matters, Supersimo, gi0v3" "Synch, revision: gi0v3" "Finally we get to meet Sam." "I wonder what he looks like." "Oh, I just wanna help you baby." "I mean what more can you ask for?" "Any second now..." "What the..." "So that's what that song's about" "I wondered where he was hiding..." "Jd, I know we've had our ups and downs, but I'm really glad we're going through this together." "Me too." "And I really was." "Ok Kim, you're still a few hours away, and I understand you'll be wanting an epidural?" "Yes, but I hate pain so much I'm hoping there's a pill you can give me so that getting the epidural itself won't hurt." " Ha ha..." " Ha ha..." "Why does she think I'm joking?" "I hate her and her chat monkey face." "Kim your quite voice is a little louder than usual." "The delivery nurses usually get the anesthesiologist to deliver your pain medication, but we are little under stuff, so.." " Jd!" " I'll be in charge of the epidural" "And as soon as you are ready, I'll have it make you so numb you're gonna feel like you 're passing a marshmallow." " But that sounds sticky and uncomfortable." " Passing a unicorn..." "That's a big horse with a horn!" " Passing a rainbow!" " That's better!" "Ok" "Uhm.." "Jordan." "Go away." "Let's go see mommy!" "Our daughter needs to go the hospital." "Her rash is spreadin' and she could use a steroid shot." "Why can't you just do it here?" "Jennifer has uropathy" "And over the next couple of years plenty of doctors are gonna be poking and prodding her." "I would like her to see me as her father, not as just anther white coat that she would forever associate with pain." "Totally legittimate argument." "Ah." "If three months olds didn't have the memory of an earthworm..." "Could you please just support us on this one?" "Fine." "I'm right behind you." "Wow that's real talent." "Babe I promise you, I would be home as soon as Kim delivers." "Yet JD needs me, and I really wanna be there for him." "Ok." "Hi people, listen up!" "I need to beat this videogame before Kim delivers Jd's bastard child," "It takes two people do it, so I can't do it by myself," " Who's with me?" " I would Turkleton, but I only play Pacman and that car jack game." "There's nothing like scoring a caddy and going down on street hos." " Sir what you're doing here so late?" " I live here." "Enid kicked me out of the house, six weeks ago." "She wheeled in and caught me hitting on her speech therapist." "C'est la vie." "Now, if you don't mind, I've got a zac coming." "Dude!" "We're friends at night." "I'll play." "Yes." "What are your thoughts on cloth diapers?" "'Cause if we got black ones with orange spots" " our kid would look like Bam-Bam." " JD." "You've been so great." "I'm feeling really connected to you, you know?" "How are you feeling about us?" "Oh no, wrong time for this conversation, but there's no way out." "Vivian." "Oh thank you Perry much." "We heard that you're having a baby, we just wanted to come by and say congratulations." " Really?" " No, I'm looking for the pediatrician." "It's not here." " Sorry, baby JD." " Her name's Jennifer Dylan, not JD." "I'm calling her JD forever and he can't stop me." "All the best there, Kim." "Please know that the entire world is praying that the dominant genes are yours." "Thank God, there's no way Kim remembers what we were talking about." "Hell, I don't even remember what we were talking about." " What are we talking about?" " I was asking how you're feeling about us." "Damn it!" "I've been work up the courage to tell you that..." " I'm falling..." " No!" "Don't say it." "Why not?" "Look, I think you're amazing, but..." "I'm just not ready to say it back yet." "That's ok." "I really hurt you, so it makes sense that you'd need more time to get there." "Bullet dodged." "Hey, what the hell..." "JD, I love you." "Cool!" "Dr. Cox!" "We heard that you were waiting for" " the pediatrician." " Oh, please." "Remember our rule?" "We..." "We heard that you were waiting for the pediatrician..." "Uh, he's at home so we paged him and he said that we should give your daughter the shot ourselves." "There is no way in hell that I'm letting an incompetent intern touch my child." "Oh, oh, but..." "But you said we are the future of the hospital and we need to learn." "You need to learn on patients not related to me." "Ones that I don't care if you kill or maim." " We are your doctors, deal with it." " Yeah, we are you're doctors." "Why don't you always talk that way?" "Because it hurts my throat too much." " Ok, all we have to do here is kill space goblins." " And what's my motivation?" "You're motivation is to kill space goblins." "Yeah, but like killing them because I hate them or because I don't share their space goblin values?" "Whatever you want." "Good shot." "What are you doing?" "I'm taking a few moments to speak on behalf of our fallen adversary." "Are you kidding me right now?" "Forgive me, space goblin." "If it weren't up for the Navas Level setting and the ten cups of coffee I had earlier today, you might have bested me this day in the marsh of Cathrick." "We're not too different, you and I. Just bide your arm-mounted cannon and your insatiable taste for human flesh..." "You realize that while you're talking this alien in front is shooting you in the face, right?" "Well, well that was just rude." "Get some!" "Ok." "Not answering Kim's "I love you" was akward, but at least it was over." "So, do you think you can ever be in love with me?" "Let it go, woman!" "Kim, let's focus on having the baby." "Answer the question." "Lie to her." "And don't lie to me." "Look, I think you're amazing, right?" "I have..." "I have mentioned that." "And..." "And even though I'm not..." "you know, in love with you right now," "I really hope that one day I wake up feeling what you said you feel, even though I kinda asked you not to say it." " Do you really hope that?" " With all my heart." "Because I always dreamed of finding a guy who hoped he can fall in love with me, someday." " Really?" "That's kind of weird." " No!" "JD?" "Do you actually think that's enough for me?" "There are a lot of guys out there who think I'm a good catch." "The words "Cute as a button" have been thrown around in more than one occasion." " I know that Kim, you're amazing." " Stop calling me amazing, ok?" "!" "Would you even be with me if I wasn't dropping this kid?" "I don't know how to answer that." "I think you just did." "You know what?" "We're done." "What..." "What are you talking about?" " We're having a baby!" " Yeah, we are, but" "I deserve to be with somebody who doesn't need to cross his fingers and hope that he falls in love with me." "Maybe, someday." "Ahhh, it's over, JD." "WHERE THE HELL IS THE EPIDURAAAL!" "?" "It's funny how even the best intentions can blow up in your face." "Don't worry." "I've practiced this on tomatoes like a hundred times." "Whether you meant to keep your daughter from associating you with pain." "Step away from the child." "Oh my... ok..." "Or you simply intended to get closure on a videogame." "This is what you call "Being there for JD"?" "Oh my God, I don't think I could be any angrier at you." "Oh yeah?" "Well, you're about to find out cause I'm finishing this videogame." "Hihihi!" "And though you have every intention of making a horrible situation better." "Ok, looks I could rally for this baby!" "No way!" "Wait!" "Wait!" "Wait!" "What about my epidural?" "Kim, you're fully dilated." "It's too late for the epidural." "You should have told told me sooner." "You often find out that you've made it worse." "YOUUUU!" "You're amazing." "WAAAAAH I HATE YOU SO MUCH JD!" "Don't worry all women say that stuff during labor, she doesn't mean it." " I DO!" "HE JUST BROKE UP WITH ME!" " What?" "Nonono, technically I didn't break up with her, I just told her I don't love her." " Who did he say that to?" " The mother of his baby!" "No, he didn't." "Man, she looks familiar..." "GET OUT!" "No, I'm not letting you go through this alone." "I have someone else I can call!" "Keith, I get it, I ruined your life, stop calling." " (Kim Moaning)" " Oh, hey, Kim." "Lok it, I know that I called you at home and I threatened to kill your dog, but thanks again for coming in there, Dr. Callahan." "No problem." "It's not like I need a lot of sleep to" " practice medicine on small children." " This'll only take a second." "My daughter needs a shot for a dermatitis." "Oh, I'm afraid I can't do that, I'm Dr. No-Shot." "You're kidding, right?" "You're a pediatrician, you must..." " give the occasional shot..." " Sure." "My name is Dr. Occasional Shot, but it's not." "Look, I have been a doctor for these kids for years," "I don't want them balling every time they see me because they associate me with pain." " That's insane." " Yeah." "And why aren't you giving your daughter the shot?" "I don't want her to forever associate me with... pain." "What?" "I didn't-I didn't catch that." "Pain." "Is it your inside voice?" "You can-you can pick it up." "Mydaughtertoforeverassociatemewithpain." "Ironic..." "We'll just have one of the nurses to give it to her." "I don't want any nurse in this town to touch my daughter." "I can't believe you're still playing this stupid game." " Hit him with the firesaber." " Hit him with a lamp." "There's no lamp in this game, sir." "I was talking to your wife." "Hit Turkelton with this lamp." "Oh, Carla, good." "Listen, I need you to give my kid a shot, it'll only take a second." "No, I can't do it." "I'm literally shaking with rage." "See?" "I would give her a shot, Perry, but this..." "is scotch, and I'm all Hasselhoffed out." "Allright." " Janitor, you're getting pummled." " That sounded like criticism." " I don't respond well to criticism." " Whatever, you still suck." " I'm out." " No, dude, come on." "Baby why'd you have to go and say that?" "I can't finish this game by myself." "Find all might leave, jump on that Warthog." "You drive, I'll mend the machine-gun and kill all the Jackals." "You've never been more sexy to me!" "Oh, that's disgusting!" "Uh." "Hey, Keith." " Burn in hell." " Hm." "I'm so sorry about you and Kim." " Is there anything I can do?" " Just take care of her." "Ok." "God, you're having a baby!" " Wanna do a celebratory jump?" " Nah, Turk, Carla and I tried one earlier," " turned out to be lame." " Oh, please..." "You privately loved it, though still don't want to admit it." "God, she knows me!" "Hey, you!" "D'Barbie go that way?" "Thanks." " GET OUT!" " Oh." "Dear God." "It is like Baghdad in there..." "Look, Noobie, I'm on the virge of losing of my mind," "Do you have the time to give my daughter a shot, now that you've ruined your life?" " Will you talk me through when I'm going to?" " Absolutely not." " Then find someone else to help you." " Oh, damn, fine." "Ok." "Fine." "But if you use the words "emotional rollercoaster" I am on your teeth." "Deal." "I just feel like I'm on this like emotional..." " ride of some sort..." " Oh..." "Kinda like a..." "Baby, you are awesome!" "Did you play this before?" "Listen," "I discovered the game when Izzy had colic and I was up all night, and I became addicted." "That's actually the main reason why I wanted it out of the apartment." "Oh..." "I thought you were mad because I'd rather play the game than play with Izzy." "Which I guess it's sometimes true, baby..." "don't get it twisted that girl is my world, but every now and then I gotta do my own thing." "You've heard of anger-pains?" "I get sports-pains." "And "watch Judge Dredd with JD"-pains" "Turk, you think you're the only one who gets pains?" "I get "Put on my tight jeans and walk down the street to see if anybody horns"-pains." "They do, actually." "I mean, how do you think I became addicted to this game?" "Every parent needs to take some time off." "You're damn right, they do." "Hell, my son Harrison is a grown man, and I still get urge to slip away during his visits." "Of course, it may have more to do with this new boyfriend he has." "I swear." "You could line up a hundred gay men, and Harrison would pick out the attention starved by poor ex-con everytime." "Oh!" "Harrison!" "Your ears must have been burning!" "And now, what do we do?" "We kill one more alien boss, and then we've finished." "I like your style." "Of course you had to break up with him." "No one you love should ever sell your car without asking and then blow all the money on meth." "The kid's not even born yet, and I'm already screwing up his life." "I just wanted him to be really happy, and normal, you know?" "Ok, first one, noobie, we're talking about your kid." "So the whole normal part was never gonna happen." " And... you didn't mess up his life." " Ah, come on, statistics show" " that kids whose parents stay together..." " "Statistics show" who... who cares, what statistic's showing?" "Look at medicine. 80% of people, with pancreatic cancer, die within 5 years, 95% of appendectomies, occur with zero complications." "But... we both know pancreatic cancer patient that lived, and appendix patients that unfortunately... passed." "Statistics mean nothing to the individual." "You're either gonna be a good parent to that kid, or you're not." "I mean, hell, your parents were divorcing, and somehow you managed to become a relatively successful doctor, and I'm sure there's... someone... somewhere... who would be proud to call you their son." " Would you be proud to call me your son?" " This conversation's over." " Carla, are you done yet?" " Not yet." "As I looked around the room, I thought about the things parents do for their kids." "Like going to extraordinary lenghts, to ensure their child never fears them." "Ok, let's keep looking." "Helping them mend their broken heart." "Oh, why can't you still be with Gary?" "I always liked him." "What do you mean "He stole your fillings"?" "Or staying up late, to make sure there's one less distraction around." "Game, and that's game, and that's how we do!" "And that's how... we do!" "That's right." "And I realized parenting is about sacrifice." "And I had to go in there and be there for my child." "Even if that meant taking some well-deserved abuse." "GET OUTTA HERE, YOU JERK!" "No." "Ok, I need you to stop pushing for a minute." " You're a piece of crap." " You're doing great." " I hate your hair." " Impossible, nobody does." "Almost there..." "Are you two ready to be parents?" "And right then I couldn't help but wondering." "Are you ever?" "Anyway, I hope you..." "I hope you want two words about us." "We'll be home real soon." "Bye." "I love watching her sleep." "I can't believe we finished that game!" "Oh, baby." "I finished it a bunch of times." " Word?" " Hmm, hm." "He's so beautiful." "I'm really glad you came back in." "Me too." "It's weird, you know." "This is the end of our relationship, but it's sorta just the beginning." "Can I hold him?" "Of course." "Here's your daddy." "Hiii." "Hi, handsome." "Welcome to the world, Sammy."