"frank:" "Hey, hey-- what do you" "Think of these, guys?" "mac:" "My god, frank." "My god." "dennis:" "You look ridiculous" "In those, dude." "charlie:" "Dude, why are you" "Wearing skinny jeans?" "because they're hip!" "And I want to stay young." "well, stay old, bro," "Because that looks terrible." "Dress your age." "I like 'em." "I think they make me look sexy." "I am getting a tremendous" "Amount of enjoyment watching you" "Parade around in those things." "So I say keep them." "yeah?" "yeah." "like a humpty dumpty vibe" "Going on with those." "it's like... sweet dee:" "Hey-oh!" "Big news, bitches!" "The ban's been lifted and we are" "Back in." "Flipadelphia, here we come." "(all exclaiming) all:" "Flip, flip," "Flipadelphia!" "Flip, flip, flipadelphia!" "flip!" "flip!" "flip!" "adelphia!" "yeah!" "what the hell is" "Flipadelphia?" "what is flipadelphia?" "it's a city-wide flip cup" "Tournament." "It's the best." "yeah!" "we were the bar to beat ten" "Years ago till we got muscled" "Out." "yeah, they very, very" "Unfairly accused us of poisoning" "Our rival team." "you got framed?" "uh, no, we did poison the" "Shit out of 'em, but they didn't" "Have any proof." "so you have a rival?" "oh, yeah." "Big time." "yeah." "this dive bar down the street" "Called molly's." "yeah." "yeah, yeah-- this year, we're" "Gonna jam it right up their" "Butt holes." "(charlie, mac  dennis groaning) um, mnh-mm." "yeah, me, dennis and charlie" "Will jam their butt holes." "you're not gonna come" "Anywhere near their butt holes." "let us handle the butt holes." "what are you talking about," "You guys?" "!" "I'm your number four." "I'm your "adelphia," and you" "Can't..." "I know, but, dee, I mean..." "What, do you, like, not remember" "The past?" "You choked under pressure in '98." "You blew the whole thing and" "We're gonna win." "And then you couldn't flip the" "Damn cup." "I know, charlie, that's why" "I've been practicing ever since." "I mean, you've got to give me" "A chance to redeem myself." "okay, fine." "You will have a chance to redeem" "Yourself." "In the meantime, what do you say" "We throw a little gas in the" "Rivalry fire?" "I thought you said this place" "Was a shithole." "yeah, it was, but it looks" "Like they've made a few" "Renovations." "well, let's not get ahead of" "Ourselves." "mm-hmm." "could be a scheme." "okay, you guys ready?" "bubblin', yeah." "guess who, bitches?" "!" "(gang screaming) oh, everybody have some lemon" "On it." "Honk!" "Honk!" "Honk!" "(charlie hooting and grunting) will the highest ranking" "Member of the staff please step" "Forward!" "art:" "I, yeah" " I'm art sloan." "I'm the owner." "(laughing) you're art sloan?" "Now, see, you look very" "Different from what I remember." "do I know you people?" "uh, allow me to refresh your" "Memory." "(gang exclaiming) whoa-whoa, what..." "What the" "Hell is that?" "flip cup." "huh?" "ten years ago." "we poisoned you, dude," "Remember?" "wait a minute-- we got really" "Sick." "(laughter) you acted sick." "but check it out, who's to" "Say we didn't out that very same" "Poison in the drinking water!" "(customers groaning, spitting) wait, everybody, relax." "He's lying." "He doesn't have any poison." "no, I don't have any on me," "But I do keep some in my fridge" "At home in the relish jar." "there's poison in that jar?" "I thought I was allergic to" "Pickles." "What's in the jar with the skull" "And crossbones?" "well, that's mayonnaise." "That's a decoy." "and the mayo?" "that's shampoo." "you tellin' me I've been" "Putting shampoo on my" "Sandwiches?" "!" "if you're using the" "Mayonnaise, yeah, probably." "I-I'm sorry." "Is there something that I can do" "For you people?" "yeah, we came to tell you" "We're reigniting the rivalry," "Dick worm." "it's back on, bitch." "you know what?" "I, I am not your rival, okay?" "I never was, and I am certainly" "Not participating in" "Flipadelphia." "ooh... flip, flip, flipadelphia." "looks like someone's scared," "Guys." "now you're just being" "Childish." "oh, yeah?" "how's this for childish, bro?" "(gang exclaiming) that's it!" "we pissed in your bar!" "I'm calling the cops." "we pissed in your bar!" "check it out!" "call the cops!" "Call the cops!" "see you Saturday." "Don't be late." "three, two, one, go." "go, go, go, go, go, go, go!" "chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!" "(clamoring) no, you're throwing too hard!" "get it!" "Get it!" "Get it!" "(sweet dee screams) what are you doing?" "!" "I don't know, you guys." "I buckled." "that was terrible!" "I'm sorry, okay!" "I thought you had been" "Practicing." "I have been practicing!" "I don't know what happened." "it's her bison-sized fingers." "I don't have bison fingers!" "I don't have bison fingers." "oh, yes, you do." "You mother had to have a" "C-section because of those" "Hands." "okay, you guys are just all" "Screaming at my face." "people are going to scream" "At the tournament." "that's it, she's off the" "Team." "shut up, frank!" "You're not even on the team." "that's true." "What is my role here?" "why did you bring that up?" "uh, yeah?" "All right, well, you're not" "Going to be on the flip cup team." "no, definitely not." "but maybe you could be, um, Team instigator." "yeah." "yeah, there we go." "that works." "sure, yeah." "I'll be the instigator." "okay." "okay, I'll instigate." "in the meantime, we need to" "Find a replacement for dee." "yeah." "okay, we need a replacement." "no!" "No-no-no-no-no, that's" "Not fair, you guys." "Don't replace me." "you're being replaced, dee." "okay, I'll tell you what." "Dee, if you can prove to us that" "You can flip ten cups in a row," "Under pressure, you're back on" "The team." "all right." "yes!" "You gotta practice." "That's all I need." "I've got to warm up." "See, I went into this cold." "I came in here cold, that's why." "yeah, that's what it was." "one mistake and you're off" "The team." "that ought to keep her busy" "For at least a week or so." "I don't think she'll ever get" "That." "okay, in the meantime, let's" "Find a replacement." "yes, and I know just the" "Place to go." "where?" "same place I learned to hone" "My god-given flip cup skills" "The delta omega lambda" "Fraternity house at penn." "wait, that was, like, 15" "Years ago." "I don't think you'd have any" "Clout there." "doesn't matter, man." "I was the king of that place." "I'm a legend over there." "(dennis sighs)" "This brings me back." "The alumni up here, nice." "(chuckling)" "Oh, man, this is the class." "Oh, man..." "There's ritter." "Oh, that's... "I chug dick."" "No." "What?" "I never" " I don't chug dick." "That's crazy." "What did..." "Why would you even" "Put-- that's not funny." "Come on, it's homophobic." "I mean, come on." "What the hell?" "(distant shouting)" "Goddamn it." "shake the ass!" "Shake the ass!" "Move the hips, man." "Yeah, there you go." "yeah, here we go, bitches." "Watch this." "frank!" "What the hell are you doing," "Man?" "I'm recruiting these guys for" "The flip cup thing." "I almost got this, dennis." "Whew!" "Whew!" "Whew!" "(cheering)" "(laughter) that's real funny shit," "Frank." "Step out for a second." "Let me handle this." "All right, guys." "I'm brother reynolds, class of '98." "dude, we were cruising the" "Sixth grade in '98, man." "oh, sixth grade?" "Cool, man." "Well, I guess I kind of blazed" "The trail for these sorts of" "Shenanigans you got going on in" "Here." "What's going on with this kid?" "uh, he's a pledge and we're" "Zapping his nuts with a stun gun" "Every couple of hours." "(electricity crackling)" "(laughter)" "Look at him!" "Look!" "that's brutal, man." "Wow." "Let me get in on that." "you want to?" "You want to get in on this?" "yeah, I'm sort of a legend" "When it comes to this kind of" "Shit, so yeah." "oh, yeah, yeah, yeah." "Cool." "let me see it." "here, man, here." "(electricity crackling)" "(dennis screaming)" "Down he goes!" "shit, that really hurts." "dennis, these guys are badass" "Shitheads." "Oh, man." "You got any ludes?" "ludes?" "I don't think they" "Make those anymore, man." "gum?" "we got rita-rall." ""rita-rall"?" "yeah." "what's rita-rall?" "Ooh, snortski." "Oh, mmm... (snorting)" "Oh!" "Ooh, that's tasty stuff." "Zap him again." "what?" "(zapping, dennis screaming) it's that easy, man." "It's that easy, baby." "don't do that shit again, you" "Little idiot!" "Okay?" "Have some respect for a brother," "Okay?" "I'm a legend around this place," "So don't zap me again." "All right, listen, I came here" "For a reason, okay?" "I came here to recruit you for a" "Flip cup tournament." "flip cup?" "!" "Flip cup?" "What are you, a freshman?" "That is so lame." "take a look at how loose his" "Jeans are." "okay, okay, all right." "(zapping, frank screams)" "(zapping, dennis screams) oh, no more zaps." "all right, I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "we're done." "(zapping, frank screaming)" "(laughing)" "all right, focus." "You can do this." "One more time just... dee, dee, it's getting hard" "To watch." "Really." "I can't stop grinding my" "Teeth." "I don't know how these kids" "Study on this goddamn" "Rita-rall." "yeah, I don't know, either," "And I don't give a shit." "hey, so how did the" "Recruiting go?" "oh, it was bad." "We both got punk'd." "yeah, we both got punk'd," "Frank." "we got punk'd out, just" "Punk'd." "we both got punk'd." "that's right." "these kids these days, I'll" "Tell you what." "They are nothing like we used to" "Be back when we were in" "Fraternities." "They have no respect for" "Anybody." "Okay, they're like stupid," "Little goddamn savages." "they're bitches." "They're bitches." "I mean, I came in there," "Right, and I was polite." "And I was nice to them." "I was cordial." "yeah." "and they completely goddamn" "Disrespected me." "Idiots!" "Idiots!" "I was completely respectful." "They're supposed to be my" "Brothers, right?" "They're my brothers?" "No, no, that's not fun." "What they were doing wasn't fun." "They kept zapping us and zapping" "Us!" "Idiots!" "Savages!" "Idiots!" "zap." "Zap." "Zap." "(charlie whistles) jesus christ, dude." "damn, man." "calm down." "all right, they" "Disrespected..." "I am a legend over there." "I know you're a legend." "Charlie knows you're a legend," "You know." "That's just the viciousness of" "Youth, you know?" "that wasn't fun." "That's not fun!" "That's not fun!" "Savages!" "I'll tell you what, dude." "Maybe you should step down from" "The fraternity thing." "Look, dude, we haven't gotten" "Art sloan to sign up yet." "he's not signed up." "why don't you focus some of" "That weird rage on him?" "Charlie and I will handle the" "Frat kids from here, okay?" "yeah, yeah." "I'll totally pull a good will" "Hunting on those kids, and" "That'll put them in their place." "how are you going to do that?" "well, you've seen the movie," "Right?" "yeah." "so all I've got to do" " I'll" "Ask them some, like, big shot," "Like, math or science," "History-type college question," "And then I'll totally stump" "Them by knowing a lot more about" "The answer than they do." "yeah, in that movie, matt" "Damon played a genius janitor." "You're just a janitor." "right." "Ah, you stumped me with that" "One." "yeah, you didn't have a" "Comeback for that." "You didn't have a comeback for" "That, so how're you going to" "Have a comeback in the frat" "House?" "all right, well, maybe you" "Ask them the math or" "History-type question." "Ah, but you're not a janitor." "don't do that, just... please, please take care of" "Those little savages." "got it." "Don't do that." "Don't do that." "it'll work if you just say" "Some lines from the movie." "It works." "flip." "That's too big, that's too... (dance music playing, party" "Chatter) oh!" "oh, my!" "what is going on in here," "Dude?" "oh, my!" "whoo-hoo-hoo!" "jesus christ." "It's like some kind of paint" "Party." "yeah!" "they're painting each other" "Up." "is this what college is like," "Man?" "I don't know, man." "I wish I went to college." "I feel like I got boned big" "Time, dude." "jesus christ, hey!" "oh, my god." "Yo!" "Hey!" "you painting here?" "That's nice." "yeah." "jesus christ, charlie." "oh, my god, dude." "my god, they're painting each" "Other." "No!" "No-no-no!" "Charlie, stay" "Focused, dude." "sorry!" "Right!" "stay focused." "We got to find guys for the" "Team, okay?" "nothing will distract us." "do not distract us." "hey, guys!" "hey!" "hey!" "hey!" "(all laughing) do you want to paint us up?" "yes." "uh..." "Paint you up?" "How?" "yes." "well, first we paint you and" "Then you paint us." "well, that makes sense, sure." "yeah." "yeah, uh... yeah." "how do we do the painting?" "with our hands." "yeah, we do." "yeah." "yeah, we do." "(laughing)" "Excuse us." "are you ready?" "yeah, no, we're ready." "We're ready." "artie sloan-- tying his" "Shirts in knots." "I like to humiliate guys," "Sure." "yeah." "I'm no different than those" "Guys are now, man." "You know, like, I used to be" "The same way." "I used to dress guys up like" "Bananas and walk them around the" "Quad." "Or I'd take a banana and stick" "It up some guy's ass in front of" "His best friend and I'd be like," ""hey!" "Banana ass, how're you" "Doing?"" "Or maybe I'd, like, uh, I'd take" "The tip of my penis and stick it" "In a guy's mouth for, like, just" "A second." "You know what I mean?" "Like, while he was sleeping." "I'm all about that shit." "You know what I mean?" "But you don't stun-gun a guy who" "Is a goddamn legend." "no!" "those guys, they need to" "Recognize that shit." "I was a" " I was a trailblazer!" "But these kids these days in" "Fraternities, it's like they" "Don't have any respect." "They don't care about anybody" "But themselves, you know?" "And I don't understand that." "It's like they live in a fantasy" "World where, "oh, no, there's no" "Consequences for my actions." "I can do whatever the hell I" ""want and treat people however" "The hell I want to treat them."" "And I don't get that." "What are you doing, frank?" "What is that?" "well, what I'm doing is," "Like, cutting the shower curtain" "In half waist-high so that when" "He's using it, people can see" "His junk." "wow, frank, that rita-rall" "Is having a very interesting" "Affect on the way you're" "Thinking." "I'm just feeling." "yeah!" "oh-ho!" "got anymore of it?" "does a bear shit in the" "Woods?" "well, cut up a couple rails," "Buddy." "I'm going to blast off." "all right." "Here you go." "all right." "Let's do this." "âª âª oh!" "and we're done." "that was awesome." "oh, that's so awesome." "that's so awesome." "and now you do us." "oh, man... and then for the best part." "there's a better part than" "This?" "there can't be a better part." "yeah, yeah, when we shower" "Together and wash each other" "Off... yeah, we do." "Oh, that's exactly what we're" "Going to do." "hey, what do you two clowns" "Think you're doing?" "that's awesome." "Nah, it's cool, man." "We're good." "we're good." "no!" "You assholes got to go." "no, man." "no, man, come on." "yeah." "yeah, yeah, you do." "You do, man, you do." "come on, man." "Hey, man... hey, hey, guys, guys, guys," "Guys, guys-- we're trying to" "Have a conversation, please." "no." "You're not in the frat." "Get out." "guys, you're killing me." "I'm going to pull a good will" "Hunting." "no, no, charlie, don't." "what's your major, dude?" "economics." "oh, I bet you read a lot of" "Gordon wood, huh?" "You read your gordon wood and" "Then regurgitate it from a" "Textbook and you think you're" "Wicked awesome doing that." "And how 'bout them apples" "And all that gordon wood" "Business?" "I have no idea what you're" "Talking about." "you are an idiot." "you are an idiot." "does no one know who gordon" "Wood is?" "you know what, cheese foot," "Go get the stun gun." "that's a great idea." "That's a great idea." "(groaning):" "Shit... (both sighing) oh, yeah!" "frank!" "Frank!" "Frank!" "Dude, I'm finished." "oh, yeah!" "I'm finished." "What are you doing?" "What do you got going on?" "What are you doing?" "I'm doing this jerk off's" "Taxes." "Next year, the irs will audit" "The piss out of him." "oh!" "That's so weird." "That's so-- that's long-term" "Shit." "I would-- yes!" "I like that." "I like that." "Hey, do me a favor, man." "Can you go upstairs and look" "Down onto the lawn?" "I have done it." "I've done it." "I've done something." "you've done it?" "yeah, give me the cigar." "I need that." "what'd you do?" "I have done it." "what?" "I've created a masterpiece." "So unfair, dude." "Yeah, dude." "So unfair!" "I mean, like, if I had known college was anything like that, the amount of book learning I would've put to my brain..." "Enough, dude!" "...to get there and stay there." "They shower together!" "And naked." "Oh!" "Boom!" "The rivalry's back on, boys!" "It is back on." "It's on big time!" "The rivalry's back on?" "Oh, yeah, it's back on." "All right, the rivalry." "ALL (chanting):" "Rivalry!" "Rivalry!" "Rivalry!" "Rivalry!" "Rivalry!" "Rivalry!" "Goddamn it." "This feels forced." "I'm not into it." "I'm definitely forcing it." "Why is it?" "Something's off." "Something's off, dude." "What's up, yeah?" "You know what it is for me?" "I can only speak for myself, but it's those goddamn punk ass frat kids, man." "They, they got to me, dude." "They really got to me." "They burned me and I haven't let it go." "Dude!" "They burned us, too, man." "Did they burn you guys?" "Is that why you're painted like that?" "Yeah, what's going on?" "All right, they have, like, this magical thing going on." "Dennis, things are different now." "Yeah." "You guys, watch this." "Oh!" "Hey!" "Oh!" "Oh!" "(all cheering)" "Ten in a row!" "With everybody watching!" "This guy!" "This guy did it!" "(cheering)" "That was amazing, Dee, and you just gave me a thought, okay?" "I think we need to rethink who our rivals are." "What do you mean?" "Well, bro, the Art" "Sloan/Molly's rivalry-- that's like ten years old." "That's old shit, man." "I think our new rivals are those punk ass frat kids." "Dude, those guys are dicks." "They're such dicks, man." "And I think with Dee's newfound flip cup skills, we can embarrass the shit out of those little bitches." "Tell you what, I will take excuse to get back to that party." "Okay, that's it." "It's a rivalry, the new rivalry." "(dance music playing, party chatter)" "What do you guys want?" "We want one game of flip cup." "If you guys win, you get to drink in our bar forever for free." "If we win, we get to come to your frat whenever we want." "And paint girls." "And get painted by them." "And take showers with them." "Lots of showers." "Okay, you're on." "All right, these guys are going to be really fast, so we need to get on to a quick lead." "So, Dee, I want you to start us off." "Really?" "Yes." "Charlie, you're going to take us home as the anchor." "Naturally." "Oh, you guys..." "You guys, I am not going to let you down, okay?" "I know you're not, sis." "I'm proud of you." "We're really proud of you." "All right, Frank, do you want to start us off in some kind of cheer or something?" "Yeah, that's a good idea." "(chanting):" "Paddy's!" "Paddy's!" "Paddy's!" "Yeah!" "Whoo!" "All right!" "Okay, both teams ready?" "Yeah." "Go!" "Go, Dee!" "Go, Dee!" "Go, Dee, go!" "Go, Dee, go!" "Chug!" "Chug!" "Chug!" "Chug!" "Chug!" "Come on, Dee!" "Come on, Dee, you can do this!" "Come on, Dee, let's go!" "Throw it in the air!" "(cheering)" "Dee, ease up!" "Dee, come on!" "Come on, Dee." "Come on, come on!" "Come on, Dee!" "(cheering)" "No!" "Your beer, free for us for life!" "For life!" "No, man!" "You guys, I'm sorry, I..." "You guys, one more time." "Let's just challenge them to one more, you know what I mean?" "I feel like we could really get these guys." "Don't you see, Dee?" "We've already won." "(Charlie laughing)" "What does that mean?" "What are you talking about?" "(stomach gurgling)" "Oh!" "Oh, God." "Hey, what?" "(gurgling continues)" "Whoa, what's going on with me?" "Oh, what's going on is that you just drank a cup of poison." "(cheering)" "You got poisoned!" "Paddy's Pub, bitches!" "You guys poisoned the beer?" "Yes, Dee, we did poison the beer." "That was the only way we could beat these little bitches." "I thought you guys believed in me." "You were so proud of me." "Oh, no." "We knew you were going to choke." "Yeah." "Yeah, we'd knew you pretty much choke under pressure, which is why..." "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "(vomiting)" "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "Flip!" "Flip!" "Flipadelphia!" "âª âª" "(Frank straining)" "Yank." "Rip 'em off." "Pull 'em off." "Yank 'em." "Yank 'em." "They're not coming off, man." "These pants are not..." "We're going to have to burn them off, I think." "Got to get them off, 'cause I got no circulation in my legs." "Yeah, I don't know." "You" "Whoa, whoa, hey." "Pump your brakes there, pal." "Slow down for a second." "What, what's your problem exactly?" "What's my problem?" "Okay, you know what?" "You disrespected my business." "You vandalized my home, all in the name of some stupid drinking competition." "And then when I finally cave in, you don't even show up." "Show up for what?" "Wha...?" "Flipadelphia!" "Oh, Flipadelphia." "Was that today?" "Yeah?" "Okay, you know what?" "I want a challenge." "Okay, my bar, flip cup today." "Let's go." "Nah." "No, we moved on." "Yeah, I'm over it." "You know what?" "That's going to be a pass for me, too." "Yeah, I don't feel well at all." "They poisoned me." "I'm not feeling it, either." "So that's going to be unanimous no from us." "Sorry." "God!" "Oh!" "(door slamming)" "Hey, now!" "Come on, man." "What was that?" "Totally uncalled for." "Who slams a door?" "Babies." "I mean, that guy's got some real growing up to do." "I mean, have some respect for" "Christ's sake." "Goddamn savage." "I am a legend."