"I want a girl." "He is naughty." "At 40." "He is sexy." "He is a hottie." "He is naughty." "At 40." "He is sexy." "He is a hottie." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "I know you want it." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "I know you want it." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "At 40." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "Want a girl." "I'm naughty." "Want a girl." "Want a girl." "Want a girl." "He is naughty." "At 40." "He is sexy." "He is a hottie." "He is naughty." "At 40." "He is sexy." "He is a hottie." "Ouch." "I want a girl." "'Britain's capital, London.'" "'The city of dreams.'" "'Everything here is unique.'" "'PeopIe from all corners of the globe come..'" "'..here to see the beautiful sights.'" "'And some come here to try their luck.'" "'Some go back.'" "'Some just embrace this city.'" "'This is Laxmi Narayan Kapoor who came..'" "'..to London from India a few years ago.'" "'And he just couldn't go back.'" "'The country changed." "The attire changed.'" "'So the name also changed.'" "'He went from being Laxmi Narayan to being called LM.'" "LM Kapoor." "Even to this day his dying youthfuIness experiences.." "..a surge when he sees beautiful girls." "Look, I lagged behind and lost." "And this is LM Kapoor's wife, Maya.." "..who is engrossed in her own world away from the real world." "She loves the one who created the world than the world itself." "hall the Lord!" "'And these are LM Kapoor's talented nephews." "'Sandeep and Randeep who have become..'" "'.." "Sandy and Randy after moving to London.'" "'They liked the air in the city so much..'" "'..that they spend every evening having fun.'" "'The manager of LM Kapoor's electronic store." "Sharafat all.'" "'See for yourself how decent he is.'" "Yes, madam." "Good morning to you." "I am the manager of this store." "Yes." "Can I help you?" "I am looking for a vacuum cleaner with a good suction." "Madam, you are holding a vacuum cleaner." "Now see the suction." "Look." "I will show it to you." "Yes." "See." "Check." "Look at this." "Up." "Up." "Up." "Stop it." "Sorry." "Sorry." "It has even got a very strong blower." "blower." "Yes." "You want to see it?" "'The life here is unique.'" "'LM is also off to enjoy the weekend like others.'" "'But what is this?" "'" "'His son Happy is not with him.'" "Come on." "Come on now." "Sorry to interrupt you, uncle." "But your dream girl is sitting next to you, isn't it?" "The tale of the dream girl ended with the birth of a son." "No more joy." "Oh, God!" "Okay, uncle." "Who is joy?" "Brother's name is Happy, right?" "hall the Lord!" "You don't watch your words in front of the kids." "Maya, the kids these days aren't kids anymore." "The London air turns them into an adult very quickly." "But our Happy is still simple and naïve." "Yes, he is as simple as a mystery." "What do you mean by that?" "I mean brother Happy never joins us on weekends." "I wonder what he must be up to sitting alone at home." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "And this is Mr. Kapoor's only son, Harvinder." "Everyone lovingly calls him Happy." "He is cent percent Indian in spite of living abroad." "I'm naughty." "I'm naughty." "At 40." "'He has never been able to lose his heart to anyone..'" "'..nor has he been able to steal anyone's..'" "'..heart thanks to his shy nature.'" "'He is 40 already." "But he is still single.'" "'He likes the inside world than the outside one.'" "'He likes it so much that he doesn't..'" "'..want to step out of his world.'" "'And nor does he share his feelings with anyone.'" "'That is why some people doubt his character.'" "Hi." "My son." "How was your weekend?" "Weekend is no weekend without you, son." "You tell me." "What did you do all alone at home for two days?" "What do I say?" "Why are you asking?" "Do you need to ask what a young son would do at home?" "You don't watch your words in front of the kids." "I will get it." "The luggage." "You will bring my luggage." "And all of you." "Go help." "You go and take rest." "You must be tired because of the journey." "Come on, brother." "You work and we rest." "How is that possible?" "No rest for the weekend, brother." "Very good." "Very good." "Brother, can I ask you something?" "Yes." "Did you invite anyone when we were not here?" "Was anyone here?" "Some girl." "Now what do I say?" "Why, brother?" "please tell us." "please." "So what?" "please tell us." "please." "Sandy." "Yes, Randy." "Brother did not say anything." "But he is not naïve." "He will speak out sooner or later." "He will reveal his feelings." "'There is no one more problem in Happy's life.'" "'He starts sIeep-waIking when the world sleeps at night.'" "It is all about sleep walking." "Yes." "He is sleepy." "sleepy." "'And while sIeep-waIking.." "..he smells girls and gets drawn to them.'" "'His disease of sIeep-waIking lands him in trouble.'" "'But it causes trouble to others as well.'" "Hi." "He is sleepy." "sleepy." "Oh, God!" "feel my body." "feel my soul." "Touch me, baby!" "Wow!" "She is doing it on a pole." "The pole is one amazing thing." "Sorry." "Sorry." "I am in heaven." "She is doing it so sweetly." "I am in heaven." "I am in heaven." "How come Happy has landed up here to make my Iife miserable?" "Mr. Sharafat all, before he exposes.." "..your decency, save your skin and hide." "Thank you." "Out of the frying pan and into the fire." "What is that?" "No." "No." "Send that tall pole dancer along with me." "Not again, baby." "I am tired." "Go to sleep." "darling, do you want some more?" "I don't mind." "Who are you?" "Who is he?" "I don't know." "I have never seen him before." "Yes." "Another one of your lovers." "I have never seen him before." "What are you both doing in my bedroom?" "Your bedroom?" "This is our bedroom." "This is my bedroom." "This is my bedroom." "Looks like it's everybody's bedroom." "Listen, call the security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "She is here." "I am not going to leave her tonight." "help." "Who else?" "Who else?" "Who knows?" "Security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "Security." "You!" "Oh, my God!" "It is my husband." "Oh, my God!" "What are they doing here?" "What are they doing here?" "What are you doing here?" "What am I doing here?" "Keep slapping on the butter." "Don't act stingy." "bless us, uncle." "bless us." "Okay." "God bless." "God bless." "Where is Happy?" "Happy is not in his room" "He isn't." "Oh, my God!" "Where did he go?" "Here he comes." "Where are you coming from?" "Now what do I say as to where I am coming from?" "What do you mean?" "I mean this should be none of your concern." "What do you mean?" "tell us the meaning of what do you mean?" "I mean I had been jogging, father." "What do you mean?" "What do you mean?" "Darn the meaning." "Henceforth, wear a track suit when you go jogging." "Got it?" "Sit." "Have breakfast." "Shift." "Don't irritate others." "Don't do that." "Leave her." "Leave her." "What?" "Moron." "My, my!" "Look.." "Look at that." "She should not frustrate others." "Hey!" "Don't frustrate.." "Don't." "Don't." "No." "No." "Are you okay?" "No." "I am Happy." "How can you be happy when you have just fallen down?" "Yes." "But nothing happened to me." "You know." "Except you." "flirt." "No." "I am happy." "You are so bad." "Hey!" "Don't frustrate me." "I told you I am happy now." "silly." "Surprising." "Father changed my name and did not tell me." "Brother Bitta, I was thinking of marrying some.." "..British girl and settling down here." "You are okay with that." "But I am supposed go to India and.." "..marry a simple village damsel.." "..and settle down over there." "Forget it." "Marry a village girl." "Then have kids." "And send them to school to teach them english." "It would better if you marry some British girl." "And you will not have to send the kids to school." "Because they will start speaking.." "..in english the moment they are born." "And you will save on the school expenses as well." "Very smart." "Very smart." "Look." "Brother Happy is also here." "Mr. Sharif." "I just don't understand." "But I have." "What have you understood?" "What you already know." "What do I know?" "What you are hiding." "What am I hiding?" "exactly what you want." "What do I want?" "Something you want to say, but you are not saying it." "What do I want to say that I am not being able to say?" "I can tell you what you are hiding." "But I won't." "Got it or not?" "I have been explaining to you since so long." "But you don't understand." "Understanding what you need to understand is an understanding." "According to me.." "..the one who pretends not to understand is silly." "You are silly." "Don't assume that I am fooIhardy." "My understanding is beyond your comprehension." "Understood, Mr, Sharif?" "Got it." "Got it." "Don't frustrate me." "You have become naughty." "He has become naughty at 40." "Naughty." "Don't call me naughty for no reason." "We have also understood, brother." "What have you understood?" "We had seen at night, brother." "You were not in bed." "What?" "Where had you been?" "I don't discuss my movements." "It is a secret." "He is Iying." "He gives the excuse that he is sIeep-waIking at night." "So do you know where he goes?" "No." "No." "No." "I don't know either." "Darn it." "Now I will have to do something." "Don't you do anything here." "Go and see what he is doing." "Go." "sheila has grown up darling for you." "hello, brother." "Hi." "What's up?" "Hey!" "Don't peek." "hello, brother." "AII is well?" "No." "They don't let you do something peacefully." "Look, I saw him at night." "He follows the same policy." "Eat, have fun and go to sleep." "He was with a girl." "I saw him with my own eyes." "What are you saying, brother?" "What's happening?" "Can't you see?" "Brother, what are your plans for tonight?" "The same that everyone else has." "Everyone has quite a Iot." "I will do a Iot." "To whom?" "To my guests." "Guests?" "There were no guests in our room." "Let us investigate." "Come on." "Come on." "Brother." "Brother." "What is it?" "Who are the guests expected?" "No guest is coming." "What is your problem?" "The problem is that we want to play.." "..cards with you during the night." "I hope you won't cheat." "No." "No." "I swear." "Why would we?" "You don't mix properly." "He doesn't deal properly." "I don't play properly." "How can three idiots play the game correctly?" "Come on, speak." "Brother, Iet us try if we can do something good." "Practice makes a man perfect." "Right." "But you know what?" "Dad doesn't like me playing cards." "Don't worry about him." "He has sent us." "hello." "uncle, this is Sandy calling from the shop." "Yes, Sandy." "tell me." "We have decided that we will check the stock tonight." "So we have asked brother Happy to help us." "Yes, son." "This is what I expected from you." "Maya, you see how hardworking my nephews are." "They are working at night as well." "And they have got Happy involved as well." "Thank you, uncle." "Are you going to have supper or be glued to the phone?" "Brother, you are fooling us." "Today, you will have to tell us who your girlfriend is." "Not girlfriend, brother." "girlfriends." "Friends." "You are done for." "Listen, if I tell you something silently.." "..but will you hear it quietly and not tell anyone?" "No." "We will keep mum." "So listen quietly." "And let this silence be." "Listen, mister, what is the big secret?" "Brother, are you going to remain silent.." "..or tell us something quietly as well?" "The truth is that I have no girlfriend." "Not possible." "impossible." "Not possible." "You'II be shocked to hear this." "I wonder what you will think." "I wonder what you will understand." "What!" "And what opinion you will form about me?" "So many possibilities." "Oh, my God!" "He is gay." "He is gay." "Right." "I am not gay." "I am a virgin." "Virgin." "Oh, no." "What a news!" "What a waste!" "You have promised that you will keep mum." "What will people say when they hear this?" "That LM Kapoor's son is a virgin in spite of living in London." "You will have to together erase the stigma.." "..attached to me thanks to my son." "Sharafat, convince him that decency is not everything." "You have to Iearn deception and trickery, too." "Teach him." "Show him what the world is." "uncle." "uncle." "Easy." "Easy." "I can understand the tragedy of your life." "Don't worry." "Eat." "Scratch." "Have fun and sleep." "I will transform your son into your daddy." "My daddy." "What say, boys?" "Yes!" "Come on, brother." "Hey!" "Dude." "Don't be a fool." "Hey!" "Dude." "Don't be a fool." "Hey!" "Dude." "Don't be a fool." "Hey!" "Dude." "Don't be a fool." "Listen up." "My friend." "Listen up." "My friend." "If haven't done anything, then your life is a waste." "Listen up." "My friend." "If haven't done anything, then your life is a waste." "Why are you living on?" "Chugging along." "There is no love or affection." "Nor are you anyone's lover." "Your life is empty." "Your life is worthless." "Understood?" "Oh." "Just shut up." "Keep quiet or say whatever you have to freely." "What should I do?" "How should I do?" "What should I do?" "How should I do?" "tell me something." "What I have to do?" "As I said, pal." "It is simple." "Dude, just use it before you lose." "Understood?" "Come with me." "Change your clothes." "Step out of the house." "We will explain everything to you." "Son, we will teach you." "Some fun." "Have a good time." "Some hot chicks." "We will show you in one night what.." "..you haven't seen in years." "Understood?" "What is this?" "What did this happen?" "But whatever happened was good." "You have transformed me completely." "You had said it." "Now I will say it." "What do I say?" "Just listen up." "Hey, dude!" "I am no fool." "Hey, dude!" "I am no fool." "Hey, dude!" "I am no fool." "Understood?" "Listen, dad has asked me to find a girl in London." "AII of you help me, please." "Brother Happy, that is why we have brought you here." "Brother Happy, the best girls of London visit this bar." "Yes." "Cream of the crop." "Forget the cream." "I haven't seen a mill yet." "Found one." "Brother, look over there." "Look over there." "The girl sitting alone." "She is even smiling at you." "I think she likes you." "Go, brother." "Go." "Go befriend her." "I think she is feeling your vibes." "folks, set me up with her." "I will take it from there." "Of course, brother." "Anything to make you happy." "Brother Happy, I am going." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Go." "Go." "Hi." "Beauty, I am Sandy." "Come on." "Come." "Brother, she is asking you to come to her room." "privately." "privately." "She wants to have a word with you." "I think the job will be done." "You also come with me." "Your mean we as well." "The two of you stand outside." "I will go in." "Good." "Good." "Made in China." "How is she?" "Very good." "Very, very good." "She took a right." "A right." "This is the room." "The door is open." "Very good." "I will stand outside." "You guys go in." "You said that you will go in and we will stand outside." "That is what I am saying." "You guys stand outside." "I will go in." "No." "I have a better idea." "You go in." "We will stand outside." "Okay." "Okay." "Shut up." "Thank you." "AII the best." "Why don't you make yourself more comfortable?" "I will be right back." "The voice is heavy." "I will have to check her out." "What happened?" "Very bad." "How was the girl?" "unimaginable." "What?" "How was she?" "She has all the qualities." "AII the qualities." "You liked her so much." "She seems like a girl from the upper body." "And she is a man on the basis of her lower body." "How come?" "The girl has urinating while standing." "But why?" "Because she is not a woman." "But a man" "Oh, dear!" "Hey!" "Why have you called me here?" "Dad, I wonder why at times, I feel that.." "..I am trapped within the circumstances." "I want to trap this trap." "Darn the trap." "Come to the point." "Stop beating aground the bush." "Dad, I want a girl." "What?" "Do you realise what you are saying to your father?" "Yes." "What?" "I want a girl." "Are you drunk?" "Open your mouth." "No." "Look, son." "A son shouIdn't ask for.." "..such things from his fathers." "Fathers don't arrange girls for sons." "shall I ask mother?" "You shouldn't be asking such things of your parents." "If I meet your demand, you know what people will call me?" "Don't you?" "Dad, you have fulfilled all my demands so far." "Who will get me a girl if not you?" "I am your father for God's sake." "So, dad, when mother married you.." "..she must have also spoken to her father." "That is called marriage." "I am not saying anything different." "Want to get married?" "Yes." "What are you saying?" "Why are you crying?" "Don't say such things, my son." "Find a girl." "I will get you married." "If you say, I can wait for 40 years more." "Maya." "Maya." "What happened?" "Why are you shouting?" "Maya, this is amazing." "Our son has asked something from me for the first time." "What has he asked for?" "He said he.." "What did he did ask for?" "He wants a girl." "Oh, God!" "So you have eventually spoilt him." "I haven't spoilt him, Maya." "He wants a joy for the first time in his life." "He wants to get married." "I also want to marry." "What nonsense!" "Oh, God!" "What are you saying?" "!" "Oh, God!" "I want to get my son married." "Not myself." "I have already asked my brother to find a nice girl in India." "And I have told Happy to go ahead.." "..if he finds some nice girl in London." "Oh, God!" "In London." "Wow!" "girls like her should give the massage." "Guys, Iet me know." "To what extent can clothes be removed here?" "Have patience." "And you will come to know." "A masseuse will be here." "And a masseur, too." "But for us, it will be a masseuse." "No worries." "I hope there will no problem." "Nothing is going to happen until you don't mess up." "But I never mess up." "But I do something, he goes wrong." "Yes." "Nothing is going to go wrong here." "only what you want will happen here." "Yes." "Yes." "Come on, guys." "Let me know." "Let me know." "But, guys, the question is when the girl comes.." "..should I lay her down face first or face down." "No." "She will lay you down." "Not you." "Why?" "You haven't come here to please her." "She will please you." "We have paid her." "We have paid her." "We will get the pleasure of pleasing.." "..others by pleasing ourselves." "It is such a pleasurable thing." "So be happy." "Shut up." "I am saying be happy." "So what is next?" "Don't be late." "Go straight." "Lie down." "should I lay her down or not?" "Lay her down." "I will do whatever is right." "Whatever." "See you, guys." "Bye." "hello." "Touch me baby." "Touch me baby." "You sleep." "I will give you a massage." "No." "I will give you a massage." "No." "I will give you a massage." "I am a professional." "please." "I will give you a good massage." "What kind of a massage do you Iike?" "Powder massage or oil massage?" "hold it." "It's okay." "She has asking what kind of a massage I want." "Powder or oil?" "Which one is safe?" "Take any one." "Both are safe." "I mean there shouldn't be any problem or trouble." "Here." "Here." "hello." "hello." "Whatever." "Whatever." "Okay." "please." "Where should I start from?" "Up or down." "hold." "Okay." "What?" "She is asking where she should start from." "Up or down." "From the back." "What?" "From the back." "Disturbing." "From the back." "Okay, please." "You broke my nose." "Excuse me." "Forgive me." "Don't give me the massage from the back." "I don't want a massage." "Mr. Sharif." "Mr. Sharif." "Mr. Sharif." "Just a minute." "Let me wrap the towel." "You have come at the wrong time." "Yes, tell me." "What happened?" "You do such disgusting things." "Mr. Sharif, the girl's nose is bleeding." "From the nose." "What have you done!" "I did not do anything." "She asked me to lie down face first." "Then she started climbing on my back." "I turned around to see what it was." "And she fell off." "He has made her nose bleed." "She will sue you." "She will sue you?" "What nonsense!" "Why would she 'Su-su' (Urinate)?" "Not urinate." "She will slam a case on you." "I say run." "Run." "Run naked." "Doctor's bill." "Medicines bill." "Massage bill." "My son came to your massage parlour." "Yes sir." "Happy." "To get a massage." "Yes." "And a girl gave him a massage." "Yes." "Your girl." "Are you sure it was a girl?" "I am hundred percent sure." "And Happy broke her nose." "Yes." "My Happy." "Yes." "Your son's name." "My Happy." "Happy." "Yes papa." "Darn your papa." "Why did you go to a massage parlour?" "You had told me to check out some girl." "I asked you to meet a girl." "Not to get a massage." "You had said that, Find a girl." "He never said where I should go and where I shouldn't." "Then go the path I take." "Where do you go?" "Where no one goes." "Which place is this where only you go and no one else does?" "To your mother." "You have been lying there for the past 40 years." "You are still stuck there." "I know where you go." "My son.." "You go for a jog and return after jogging.." "I am sorry, son." "Don't you eat anything?" "Son.." "I am a virgin." "I am not stupid." "Okay." "I understand." "You are not stupid." "You are only a virgin." "You are not happy." "You are not married." "You have no joy." "No marriage." "No joy." "So." "How much is your bill?" "Papa." "Papa." "Excuse me, Papa." "Excuse me." "It is a familiar voice." "Excuse me." "Stop running, please." "What are you doing here?" "Now you come so regularly to exercise." "well, I.." "What I?" "well, I.." "Sorry." "You are fooling the entire family." "Why have you come here?" "actually, I know that you are very sad.." "..after knowing that I haven't done anything yet." "Why are you crying?" "Let me finish." "Sorry." "Proceed." "Dad, actually.." "..the story in the story behind this story is a very tragic one." "Darn the.." "Forget the tale behind the tale." "tell me the basis of this story." "The basis." "But the story goes like this." "Don't look there." "I am telling the story." "What happened is.." "Papa, do you know how much people have irritated me?" "They do various gestures at me assuming that I am lonely." "That I am alone." "You are not alone or anything." "Now here's your father's story." "We will find a nice.." "..beautiful, weII-cuItured life partner for you." "Not here." "In India." "You are not alone." "You are my son." "'Happy's smart uncle and aunty live in India's Sundar Nagar.'" "'They are landlords." "They own gardens and orchids.'" "'They don't lack anything except brains.'" "Lord Krishna said.." "Who said what?" "You are getting into your own house like a thief." "Why don't you take the stairs?" "You are already a heart patient." "I am a heart patient, that is why Shambhu Sharan.." "..has asked me not to climb the steps with a smile." "Now who is Shambhu Sharan?" "My latest doctor." "I just performed his final rites.." "..in the graveyard with a smile." "Forget him." "Come up." "Put your hand out." "Come up." "It looks close." "But the height is a little too much." "You are up finally." "Today, you have pulled me up." "Look, God will also pull you up with a smile." "Who will look after you if I go to heaven?" "God will." "With a smile." "Do you know?" "An apple a day keeps the doctor away." "And your forefathers have left behind.." "..so many orchids of apples." "But you still run after doctors." "Shampa, I am not fortunate to have apples." "I am destined to have only grapes." "Go get a glass with a smile." "'So this is how Happy's uncle Chatur is.'" "'UncIe Chatur has fixed Happy's marriage..'" "'..with his brother-in-Iaw's wife's sister.'" "'He invited both of them to his house..'" "'..so that both the boy and girl's families could meet.'" "What has happened to him all of sudden?" "Oh, God!" "Where are you going?" "What happened?" "What happened?" "The girl is very nice." "But why did you run?" "I did not run." "I got excited and moved to a side." "You got excited." "Okay." "Come." "I will talk to them." "Come." "Come on." "Come on." "I am very happy." "Are you okay?" "Your daughter is really beautiful." "But I don't understand how come she was born to you?" "Sorry." "This is God's gift." "Yes." "Yes." "Oh, God!" "I Iike her a Iot." "Okay." "Son, what are you doing here sitting among us?" "What do you mean?" "Where should I go?" "No." "I mean take my daughter to a side.." "..and take her around the garden." "talk to her." "And try to understand each other, son." "We have to explain these things even.." "..to the kids of this generation." "will you please come to a side?" "Come on." "So this is your first marriage?" "almost." "What do you mean by almost?" "You almost got married before this?" "No." "The wedding did not happen." "The rest has happened." "The rest has happened." "Then what is left?" "The marriage." "I mean the marriage was fixed." "I got many proposals as well." "But no one discussed the proposal further." "Amazing." "If you were in London, you would have been teased a Iot." "really?" "You are so beautiful." "Worthy of being teased." "Now when I come with you to London.." "..I will be obviously be teased." "No." "Why would someone else tease you?" "Anyway, you must be weII-educated." "Yes." "almost." "almost." "Yes." "This almost is very nice." "Because I am almost Iiterate." "You ask something as well." "I have heard that your marriage hasn't been fixed yet." "Why are they taking so long?" "shall I go and find them, brother-in-Iaw?" "I'II be right back." "Hey, Iet them talk." "You answer one question." "Yes?" "Why are you throwing away the outer covering.." "..of the 'Samosa' (Indian snack).." "..and eating only the stuffing?" "The doctor has told me to avoid eating the outside food." "Which doctor?" "Shambhu Sharan." "Who Shambhu Sharan?" "My latest doctor Shambhu Sharan." "Sister, day before itself I have performed his.." "..funeral rites with a smile." "Brother-in-Iaw, will you have it?" "No." "Give it to brother-in-Iaw." "Brother-in-Iaw, have it." "Yes, give it to me, I'II eat it." "You will reach to Shambhu Sharan directly." "'Keep walking." "Keep walking." "Keep walking.'" "'You are so sleepy." "So sleepy." "So sleepy.'" "Stop it now. -'Oh, yes!" "'" "I am puking continuously." "I wonder what junk food I consumed." "Hey?" "Who is sleeping upside-down?" "Upside-down?" "!" "Oh, my God!" "please don't think anything wrong." "I see!" "He is Iying straight with you.." "..and I shouldn't consider it wrong?" "please don't." "Because she is telling you not to consider it wrong." "I am also telling you not to consider it wrong." "So the matter is not as wrong as you think it is." "I will explain to you how straight and reverse the matter is." "My son is characterless!" "He has not glanced at any girl since the Iast forty years." "In fact, he is a virgin." "A virgin!" "My foot!" "His proposal got fixed now." "And he slept on my wife's bed." "I wonder where he will sleep after the marriage." "I was not sleeping." "I was dreaming." "Why don't all of you try to understand?" "My son suffers from sIeep-waIking." "If he has a disease, keep it confined to your house." "At least don't spread it outside." "Mummy!" "Mummy, I don't want to marry a boy.." "..who sleeps on my bed, but wakes up from somewhere else." "Look, we've been entertained enough by the hosts." "We won't wait here even for a moment now." "So who has stopped you?" "AII of you go away." "Listen to me.." "Shut up, free-Ioader of in-Iaws." "At least listen to me.." "Shut up!" "Keep quiet!" "We will get many girls for our Happy." "I am telling you!" "Yes." "Come on, Iet's go." "Let's go." "We don't want to fix the alliance with such a boy either." "They are insulting us needlessly." "Look, Mr. Laxmi Narayan, it is really sad." "The first proposal is cancelled." "I have seen his horoscope." "There is only one possibility." "If this wedding doesn't take place he will never get married." "Papa, will I die a bachelor?" "Let your enemies die." "Look, priest, my son is behaving weird.." "..because he has not got married yet." "I can see that." "secondly, if you want any extra fees.." "..please go and find a girl." "You find God as well if you look for HHHim." "Right." "There is one girl." "Our Daya Shankar's daughter." "Okay." "But.." "But what?" "I want the girl." "Did you hear that?" "He wants the girl." "Yes, you'II get her." "So you go ahead with the proposal." "I don't want to get married." "No!" "No!" "No!" "Dear, you have grown up now." "Right?" "So you will have to get married, dear." "How is it possible, dear?" "Stop imitating and act wisely." "You have really grown up now, dear." "please get married, dear." "Papa, you have grown up as well." "Why don't you get married too?" "Dear, I'II think about remarrying later.." "..but at Ieast you marry for the first time." "I don't want to get married." "The boy is very decent." "He belongs to a good family." "You know, that boy lives in england." "After marriage, you will go and settle in england." "Whether the boy stays in england, GreenIand, White.." "..blue or some island, I don't want to get married!" "That's it!" "Gauri!" "Gauri, listen to me." "Gauri!" "I will not get married." "I will not get married." "I will not get married." "I will not get married." "I will not get married." "I will not get married." "If you won't get married, then what will you do?" "You have grown so old." "I.." "I am telling the truth, I will run away." "really?" "You'II run away?" "Where will you run away to?" "Bring that rope." "Unfasten that rope." "Okay, I'II unfasten the rope for you." "I'II show you right now." "Here." "I have unfastened the rope." "Come on, now run and show me." "I'II show you right now." "Look." "Yes, show me." "Show me." "Look at this." "slowly." "slowly." "Don't fall." "I am going." "I am telling you." "Gauri, be careful, dear." "Be careful." "slowly." "Be careful, dear." "Papa, I am your daughter." "Yes." "Don't fall, dear." "Go slowly." "carefully." "Be careful." "Very good." "Hey, listen!" "Listen!" "Hey, listen!" "Hey, listen, Gauri!" "Look!" "Look!" "Look!" "Fantastic!" "You have climbed down very easily, dear." "Gauri, you should join some circus." "Okay, enough of joking." "Enough of joking." "Come up now." "I will not come up." "Hey?" "She has really run away." "Watch your step, dear." "I am sorry, grandma." "Where are you going?" "I am running away from home." "My darling grandma." "Hey, where are you going?" "I am running away." "Yes, run away." "I will handle your father." "He said I will repent." "I replied that it's my fate." "It's my fate.." "uncle, why are you taking the spoon?" "Brother Daya, the disease is such." "Dr. Shambhu Sharan had told me while.." "..prescribing the medicine.." "..that I should take two teaspoons with water." "Why only two?" "Take four spoons." "Take the whole tea set." "It is your house." "But not Iike this.." "I don't want the tea set." "Where is the girl?" "The girl is not at home right now." "How is it possible?" "while coming you said that she is at home, come with a smile." "That time she was at home, but she isn't now." "Where has she gone now?" "The girl has run away." "What a shame!" "The girl has eloped before marriage with a smile?" "No, no!" "May God forbid!" "What nonsense are you talking, uncle Chatur?" "She has not run away like you think she has." "Then how has she run?" "She has run today like she runs away daily." "Did she use to run with.." "on her head daily?" "No, uncle Chatur, she is cheerful and lively." "Sometimes, she escapes through the door or the window.." "..or the terrace." "She has run away from the terrace today." "She will return in some time." "But I didn't see your nephew." "Where has he run away?" "Where will he run off to?" "He has come here running from London." "I had taken my bath early, so I came first." "He is coming with the priest after me." "uncle Chatur, he is your nephew, so you know him well." "Of course." "And Gauri has grown up before your sight." "Yes, definitely." "So what do you think?" "will they make a good pair?" "Brother Daya, as for making a good pair.." "..the boy's age is little.." "A little.." "It is a little more." "And the girl's age is..a little less." "They will definitely make a good pair slowly." "So you mean they will make a perfect balance with a smile!" "That's what I want, uncle Chatur." "That's what I want." "I say, get married." "This is one thing which is compulsory for everyone to do." "You know, my parents had married, too." "Whom did your papa get married to?" "My mummy." "And whom did your mummy get married to?" "My papa." "So whom should I marry?" "Mummy or papa?" "fool, you marry the person whom your parents want you to." "AII right." "This work should be done." "This is the girl Gauri." "Do you see that fruit?" "Yes, yes." "That upper one?" "That one?" "Yes, that one." "It's that one, right?" "Yes, pluck it." "The girl is good." "So should I go ahead?" "You will go ahead?" "Yes." "Why will you go ahead?" "You don't get involved in it." "It is my affair." "I will go ahead in this matter." "You go ahead in the matter where you are supposed to." "Gauri." "Yes?" "Can you pluck that fruit without climbing that tree.." "..and without hitting it with a stone?" "I don't think so." "Not possible." "hello." "Who are you?" "I am Harwinder." "My nickname is Happy." "You are Gauri, right?" "Why are you playing with the children?" "Hey, Mister!" "tell me." "Don't try to flirt with her." "She is going to get married soon." "Married?" "But why?" "I mean for what?" "I mean to whom?" "With a boy from London." "I know." "By the way, he is me." "What?" "What?" "Yes, by the way." "Oh, so you are that person?" "Yes." "You look good." "You look handsome, too." "Cute as well." "Wow!" "Yes." "Thank you." "He looks exactly like a hero." "How sweet!" "She is talking exactly like my grandma." "She used say this with her broken teeth." "tell me one thing." "Can you carry me on your lap?" "I have not seen such in films too." "I mean why not?" "So come on, carry me." "shall I?" "Yes." "Come on." "Create a pandemonium." "Oh, wow!" "He has carried me." "Have a blast." "Now put me down." "Okay, can you carry me on your shoulder?" "Yes?" "But why do you want to climb on my shoulder?" "Let us also see how much.." "please carry me." "Okay." "Aren't you overdoing it?" "Fantastic!" "Look.." "..they have become friendly as soon as they met." "No, they have mingled after being friendly." "Brother-in-Iaw, they have mingled with each other." "We have found our daughter-in-Iaw." "Radhe-Radhe." "And we have got a son-in-Iaw." "So both of us should also mingle with each other." "Brother-in-Iaw, you are wrong." "You are wrong." "I see." "Here." "You are wrong." "You are wrong." "Then where should I go?" "He is the person." "I am the girl's father." "They have mingled and you have also met." "If you say, shall I fix the wedding date?" "definitely fix it, priest." "What are you doing?" "No!" "No!" "No!" "Wow!" "You have done it!" "Wait a second." "Take the 'Naspati' (Pear)." "Come on!" "How strange!" "I have come become her husband yet.." "..and she has plucked the pear." "Look, Sharon.." "..you are trying to sell our clients bikini, right?" "Yes." "The concept is, Even though the water is cold.." "..one who wears the bikini is hot." "What is this game?" "Hide and seek with blindfold." "Turn around." "Which sort of a hide and seek game is this?" "You have to catch me." "Catch me!" "No sound." "Camera." "Action." "Even though the water is cold.." "..the one who wears the bikini is hot." "Sir, but this was not written in the script." "It was not in the script?" "Hey, out!" "Oh, God!" "Idiot, you have not caught Gauri, but a fair dame." "Cut!" "Idiot!" "You have ruined our shot." "Can't you see?" "Is it your age to play with the children?" "What?" "Have you found a new way to tease the girls?" "Security!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "It's okay." "It's okay." "Go!" "Go!" "It's okay, dad." "Let him go." "God bless you." "Why do you roam as Dhanno?" "Your tresses are so scattered." "At least grow up now." "I am." "I am 5 feet 5 inches tall." "None of my friends are so tall." "I am talking about your mind." "Mind?" "Grow up mentally." "So give me." "What?" "Brains." "I will make it large right now." "silly girl." "Okay, grandma." "Yes?" "You know what happened?" "Yes?" "That boy from London.." "What did you do with him?" "I didn't do anything." "Then?" "I was playing hide and seek with him." "while playing, he caught that fair dame instead of me." "You are going to get married." "Give up this childishness." "Grandma." "Yes?" "Why does one get married?" "By getting married, a home gets settled, a family is formed.." "..children are born." "really?" "Yes." "So where is your child?" "I have him." "Your father is my child." "Listen to this." "He is such a big man, he is not a kid." "Even though children grow up.." "..they are always children for their parents." "I don't understand anything." "Hey, you will understand everything." "When you have children, you will understand everything." "really?" "Yes." "Oh!" "It's you!" "Hi." "I am Happy." "I see." "I am sorry." "Are you happy or are you sorry?" "No, no, my name is Happy." "And I am sorry about that.." "It's okay." "I am Sharon." "Hey!" "would you Iike to come in?" "Of course." "I am naughty." "I am naughty." "I am naughty." "You know what?" "I have seen you somewhere." "Where?" "On.." "In London." "Oh!" "So you live in London?" "Yes." "Sit down." "Thank you." "would you Iike to have something?" "You!" "I mean no." "Thank you." "I am naughty." "What brings you to India?" "I Iove this country." "Okay." "And I am here for a modeling assignment." "Good to know that." "What about you?" "I have come here for marriage." "Not love marriage." "Arranged marriage?" "Yes." "What about love?" "They think once I get married, I will faII in love too." "What if you don't?" "Then?" "'So the wedding night is more important for Happy than love..'" "'..for which he is preparing with great excitement.'" "Yes?" "May I get that?" "You will." "You definitely will." "The shop is available for that." "Which one do you want?" "The one which is used." "AII of them are useful here." "What is the name of that thing of yours?" "Oh, my God!" "Brother, I want a packet of condoms." "Pappu, give him a packet of condoms." "Yes, sir." "Come on." "please come here." "What is the name of that?" "I was referring to what he is saying." "So say that you want condoms." "Which flavor should I give you?" "Strawberry, chocolate or vanilla?" "No, I don't want ice-cream." "I am not talking about ice-cream either." "Do you want ribbed or lubricated?" "Brother, don't confuse me." "Give all the varieties." "Pappu, make a gift box for him." "Rs. 199." "Mummy, what are you doing here?" "I have come to take the medicine for pain." "And you?" "I had also come here to take the medicine of my pain." "What pain do you have?" "I have a Iot of pain." "But no one tries to understand it." "Can I help you in any way?" "No." "It is a pain in which you have to help yourself." "Rimzim and Coca cola." "Ting-a-Iing." "Sharafat said after drinking it." "Ding-dong-ding." "We open a new lid every night." "They say whether you drink good or bad, whenever you drink.." "..drink wine decently with Sharafat all." "Right." "Drink and make merry, buddy." "tell me something, brother Jinn." "I mean, dear brother." "Shut up!" "You are serving us gin for the first time in life." "What's wrong?" "actually you know our friend Mr. Virgin." "Yes." "He is getting married and becoming a husband." "That's why I'm serving gin to everyone." "I want to be.." "So drink gin and say cheers to Mr. Virgin." "Cheers!" "Cheers!" "Cheers!" "Oh, my, my!" "I didn't sleep the entire night." "I caught my heart and wept." "It's unfair, beloved." "It's unfair." "Brother Sharafat." "Yes?" "But brother Happy is a little innocent." "On the top of it.." "..we have not given him complete training either." "So what will he do during his wedding night?" "What will he do?" "Yes?" "He will eat." "He will scratch." "Switch off the lights." "And?" "He will go to sleep." "By the way, brother Sharafat, I've seen many weddings in life." "But you know, by chance, I never got.." "..a chance to see a wedding night." "By the way, what do they do on the wedding night?" "What else?" "They do what we do here every night." "Yes." "By the way, if I had got a chance to go to India to.." "..attend the wedding, we would have danced and celebrated." "Yes, definitely." "And who would have worked here?" "Your father?" "Buddy, we would have incurred a loss of thousands of pounds." "As for partying, we are having a party here." "Yes." "Brother Happy is celebrating happily in India.." "..and we are celebrating here in London." "Say cheers once again." "Cheers!" "I am sorry." "How will our sister-in-Iaw be?" "She must be lying on the wedding bed and blushing." "She must be swaggering." "She must be showing-off." "She must be feeling restless." "Fantastic." "She must be feeling restless." "And she must be feeding him by calling him Happy." "But so many gifts?" "AII of them are mine." "Open them." "Open them." "Take this one." "It is very heavy." "Come on, give it to me." "Give here." "Let me check what it contains." "I'II open it." "Open it." "Open it." "Sister." "Yes?" "please check what it contains." "Yes, please open it." "Open it." "Open it." "Come on, open it." "Hey, wait!" "please open it, sister." "Wait." "Does it contain chocolates?" "Yes." "please open it and see." "The box is big." "balloons!" "balloons!" "Yes!" "balloons!" "Oh, my God!" "So many balloons!" "To whom do they belong?" "Me!" "You are very lucky." "So I am." "You know what we have to do." "Yes." "Yes!" "Mr. Daya Shankar, don't worry at all." "Okay." "till Gauri's passport and visa is prepared.." "..Happy will stay with uncle." "Why not?" "Of course." "It is your generosity, Mr. Laxmi Narayan." "Go, son." "Start the new journey of your life." "Your mother has taken an oath." "Now I will go on a pilgrimage with her." "Radhe-Radhe." "You go on a pilgrimage.." "..so something good will happen to me here." "Fantastic!" "Come on, darling." "How strange!" "'So that moment of wedding night did arrive in Happy's life..'" "'..for which Happy was waiting since many years.'" "Hey?" "What's this?" "I had a dream that today I'II enter the room.." "..raise your veil and you will feed milk to me." "But the glass of milk is Iying far away." "And you?" "You are lying there?" "Hey!" "Tonight is not the night to sleep, but do something else." "In fact, I say that it is the night to.." "..sleep after many things have happened." "Have a blast!" "Have a blast." "Have a blast!" "Have a blast." "Have a blast!" "Have a blast." "uncle!" "uncle!" "Listen!" "Listen!" "What is it?" "The screams are being heard from their room." "uncle!" "Let her scream." "It is their wedding night." "You had also screamed with a smile." "Go to sleep quietly." "Hey, she is not screaming, it's he who is shouting." "uncle!" "will you go and check or should I go?" "Keep quiet!" "Quiet!" "You don't shout." "Oh, why are they shouting?" "uncle!" "What's wrong, nephew?" "uncle!" "What's wrong?" "Gauri is not in the room." "What?" "Gauri is not in the room." "If Gauri is not in the room, she must be out." "She is not out either." "If she is not out, she must be inside." "She is not inside either." "If she is not inside, she must be up." "She is not up either." "If she is not up, she must be down." "She is not down either." "She must be in front." "She is not in front either." "She must be.." "She is not in the front.." "..the back, up, down, inside, out, nowhere." "If she is not in front, back, up, down, in, out, nowhere.." "..then where has she gone with a smile?" "That's what I am asking you." "Why are you asking me in return?" "Listen, honey, where has Gauri gone with a smile?" "Hurray!" "Come on!" "The bride has come." "Come on, pick up the palanquin." "Where has everyone gone?" "Come on!" "Come on!" "Where has everyone gone?" "I don't see anyone." "Just because I went to the bathroom.." "My sweet home.." "Hey, where has everyone gone?" "Hey!" "Gauri, no one has gone anywhere, dear." "Everyone is set on their places with a smile." "Come on, Iet's go home." "Everyone is searching for you." "Come on, dear." "Start loving quickly.." "Gauri, where had you gone?" "'Doodha' (milk). -'Doodha'?" "Yes." "Say again." "Doodha." "Doodha!" "I am not in a hurry to raise the veil." "But I wonder why I am feeling scared on hearing your voice." "Let me know who this is." "No!" "What has happened?" "How did it happen?" "When did it happen?" "Why did it happen?" "Listen." "I have heard that when someone is overjoyed.." "..her face changes." "Look, I beg of you." "please come in your real form." "This is my real face." "This is your real face?" "Yes." "Then you are my new woman." "Then this wedding is not a wedding." "You are not my wife." "I am not your husband." "In such a situation, the question is, Where is she?" "You were slim before marriage." "How did you become so fat now?" "Hurray!" "We have not celebrated the wedding night yet.." "..then from where have these children come?" "You have got us in dowry." "Understood?" "Quiet." "It is a crime to take and give dowry." "really?" "So it's a sin?" "Then you are the father of.." "..of us children, you drunkard." "Drunkard?" "!" "I am not a drunkard." "Come on, Iet's run!" "Let's run!" "Let's run quickly." "Come on, hurry up." "Make your darling daughter understand." "She was missing the entire night and our children, too." "It is the limit." "I'II explain to her." "I'II explain to her." "When will I be able to do it?" "You will be." "What would we have done if anything.." "..had happened to our children?" "She has no sense." "Shut up!" "Everyone is after my daughter." "Grandma, I had gone because of them." "They told me.." "To attend someone else's wedding." "So I went to attend someone else's wedding instead of mine." "What is my fault in it?" "Oh, grandma!" "calm down, Gauri." "calm down." "calm down." "calm down." "AII of you please go, I'II explain to her." "please go." "Let's go, children." "explain to her." "Why don't you explain to her?" "I am sorry." "I am sorry." "please go." "When will I be able to do it?" "What?" "That thing which should happen after the wedding." "Honeymoon?" "I don't know about the honeymoon." "It's enough if I can celebrate our wedding night." "When, where and how will I be able.." "..to celebrate my wedding night?" "Son, I can tell you when and where.." "..but how can I tell you how?" "I am the girl's father, after all." "If I can't ask you, should I ask grandma?" "It's useless to ask grandma." "She had got married many years ago.." "..she must not remember anything." "If I can't ask you, I can't ask grandma.." "..and she is not worth asking." "So whom should I ask, after all?" "Do one thing." "You ask your uncle." "I should ask uncle?" "Yes." "relax." "relax." "Be patience." "You may go wrong in haste." "Gauri is still a kid." "She is immature." "What does she know what happens after and before marriage?" "You will have to explain her, son." "uncle, first I was immature." "Now she is immature." "Do you understand what's happening in this immaturity?" "So you will have to explain to her." "How can I explain Gauri?" "Her family members will explain it to her." "I can tell you." "You are my dear one." "Look, son, it is not a foreign place." "It is our village." "A sweet village." "A small village." "The girls and women here first don't.." "..allow anyone to touch them." "And when they do, they surrender completely." "What?" "Take your aunt's instance." "It took me one month to touch her." "One month!" "Yes." "That's too much." "That's what I'm saying." "Don't make any fuss." "Nothing." "relax." "Don't get carried away in emotions." "Go quietly." "It is a calm place." "Sit there for awhile." "Look at the water." "feel the cool breeze." "I'II be back in some time." "Where are you going?" "I am going to do your work." "Life is..what do they call it in english?" "Adjustment." "Yes." "Understood?" "You adjust a little and she will adjust a little." "Then life will smile and keep smiling." "silly boy!" "Why do you become sad?" "Go and sit there." "I am not sad." "I am not sad." "I'II be back in some time." "I am thinking." "Okay, listen." "Yes?" "If anyone asks, say that you are uncle Chatur's nephew." "Okay." "Fine?" "The children nowadays don't know what adjustment is." "Is it called life?" "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "It is the account of love." "Think carefully before you invest." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "I am in a fixed deposit since many years." "I am standing where I was." "I am in a fixed deposit since many years." "I am standing where I was." "No interest." "No premium." "No per capita income." "How should I impress you?" "You suggest." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "It is the account of love." "Think carefully before you invest." "Someone tell the boss to send more money here." "We are standing on the edge, the waves hit here." "Someone tell the boss to send more money here." "We are standing on the edge, the waves hit here." "Yes, we can progress, have confidence in us." "Yes, we can progress, have confidence in us." "We love you, don't harass us." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "It is the account of love." "Think carefully before you invest." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "I'II adjust a little." "You adjust a little." "A little." "A little." "Adjust." "A little me." "Adjust." "please adjust." "Hey?" "beautiful!" "Isn't it?" "What?" "The wild weather." "Yes." "beautiful to look at." "Then just forget it." "Why?" "Why didn't you invite me to your wedding?" "I couldn't even call my cousins from London." "I had to get married instantly." "Okay." "Come home." "I have got a gift for you." "A gift?" "Hey, wait!" "I can't blow my balloon at all." "Wait." "Sister, run!" "Run!" "Run!" "Oh, come on, Iet's run!" "Let's run!" "He said I'II repent." "I said it's my fate." "He asked what do I want.." "Hey?" "There are so many apples on only this tree and safety on this?" "I had grown the tree of apples, but how did safety grow on it?" "Champa!" "Champa, do you hear with a smile?" "I have seen an unbelievable scene." "I am hearing." "Have you ever said anything?" "I am saying." "Now I have understood why there is a downfall.." "..in the harvest of apples this year." "Why?" "The safety measure which we used.." "..to use during our youth days.." "..now the trees have started using them." "What have they started using?" "Oh, shameless fellow!" "Do I Iook sexy?" "Very sexy!" "No, no!" "Good." "In this box, there is another night dress." "Give it to your wife from me and she will also look sexy." "Thank you very much." "Thank you." "Gauri!" "Gauri!" "Yes?" "Look what I have brought for you." "What have you brought?" "Come here for a second." "Yes." "please turn around." "should I turn around?" "Yes." "Why?" "please turn around." "AII right." "I have turned." "Hey, what are you doing?" "Whenever you come near me, you start undressing me." "I will complain to grandma about you." "But I am your husband." "Even I know that you are my husband." "So if you know that I am your husband.." "..why are you treating me like a stranger?" "What nonsense are you talking?" "I mean to say you.." "You be close to me." "Come closer." "Here." "I have come." "tell me." "Come closer." "Okay." "Now tell me." "Yes." "Look in my eyes now." "Why?" "Do you have any problem in your eyes?" "Yes, I have a big problem." "And you can get rid of this problem.." "..without taking any trouble." "And even if you feel a little pain, there is no problem." "Look at me with love." "Is it love?" "Yes." "Look like this." "Look more lovingly." "Keep on looking." "Keep on looking like this." "You are doing the same thing again." "I'II bite you." "Hey, I am thinking about spending my Iife with you.." "..and if you bite me, how will our life be spent?" "Hey!" "Why are you taking the rounds?" "How does she bite?" "What are you playing?" "Let's do something." "Come on, Iet's play." "Life is not a game." "I am talking about that game because.." "..of which you came into this world." "Because of the game I came to this world." "Because of the game this world is going on." "Because of the game the great ones come to this world.." "..they come and play and come while playing." "It is the game of love." "Everyone is playing." "I want to play it, too." "So shall we play?" "It's happening." "It's happening." "Very good." "Very good." "It's perfect." "Sit." "Yes." "Very good." "I was talking about this game itself." "What problem do you have in being close with me?" "Whenever you come close to me, why do you undress me?" "I undress you because I've brought new clothes for you." "Wow!" "Oh, yes." "really?" "Look!" "Look at this." "Oh, wow!" "Wear and see." "You will look like a normal girl." "This is.." "Just like others." "It is very beautiful." "Yes." "You wear it." "How can I wear it?" "Wear it for my sake." "please." "AII right." "Okay." "Very good." "So if I'II wear it, will you too wear it looking at me?" "Yes." "I'II wear it." "Promise?" "Promise." "Very good." "Oh, God!" "Why are you undressing before me?" "If I don't undress you, can't I undress myself either?" "AII right." "Remove them." "tell me when you wear it." "Okay?" "Yes, I am undressing." "Just wait." "Did you wear it?" "Did you wear it?" "shall I open my eyes?" "How do I Iook?" "Isn't it?" "You look mind-bIowing!" "Let's do one thing." "Let's play now." "Hey, I am not a toy." "Come on." "What's wrong?" "Did it catch fire?" "What's wrong?" "Come on!" "Yes?" "Oh, my God!" "Nephew, how did you become like this with a smile?" "When did I get a chance to smile?" "As soon as I tell her to smile with a smile.." "..she smiles and gives a new excuse for smiling." "What sort of a girl have you brought?" "I have brought a girl like a girl." "But tell me, why don't you look like a boy?" "Don't touch." "Why don't you look like a boy?" "As soon as I tell the girl to be like.." "..a girl and the boy like a boy.." "..the girl doesn't behave like a girl, she fights and.." "..makes the boy behave like a girl." "Is this the way?" "No experiments." "Is it.." "Forgive me, master!" "Mind blowing!" "I don't understand anything with a smile." "Hey!" "Hey!" "Hey!" "You can't do this to me." "You can't do this to me." "No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "Hey!" "Hey!" "I think she doesn't want anything." "And I shouldn't force the one who doesn't want anything." "Some people are frustrated about sex.." "..while the others have no interest in it." "She is so different." "She doesn't know anything about it." "Then you must teach her." "I can teach her." "But somebody should teach me first." "She is the best teacher in the world." "Here is a book on Kamasutra." "Study it together." "I have found a source." "Let's see if it works or not." "Chatur, what are you doing?" "Why are sitting with your mouth open under the lights?" "Is everything fine?" "Brother Daya, I am feeling heavy since last 2½ years." "really?" "Yes." "You know Dr. Shambhu Sharan." "Yes." "Before dying.." "..he had said that a heart patient should eat light." "Since then I change the bulbs and eat light." "Sometimes the 100 watt bulb or 40 watt bulb or zero watt bulb." "But what are you doing, uncle Chatur?" "Eat this heavy sweet." "You'II feel light by eating it." "really?" "Yes." "Eat it." "It is tasty." "You seem to be a doctor, too." "I am feeling very light." "Where is dear Gauri?" "I don't see her around." "You will see her if you look around for her." "She is playing in the garden." "You go and eat her head." "I am feeling light on eating the heavy sweets." "Okay." "You feel lighter." "feel lighter." "But don't become so light that you fly to Shambhu Sharan." "Oh, father, you have dropped my apples." "Oh, Gauri!" "Gauri, I was looking for you." "How are you?" "What do you mean by how?" "I am as I was." "You know, I had come to see you." "Why?" "Haven't you ever seen me?" "You are seeing me since years." "You will never improve." "well, dear, I am very happy to see you happy." "And you always be happy, okay?" "And listen." "Yes?" "Keep him happy too." "He?" "Who he?" "So you have come." "Yes." "What are you hiding?" "The thing which I can't show you." "What is it that you can't show me?" "What I am hiding." "What are you hiding from your aunt, nephew?" "The thing which I can't show aunt." "I can show you, but not here." "If you saw it here, you will lose your control." "Why will I lose my control?" "You will start smiling here." "Yes." "I am sorry." "AII right." "Go." "smile at leisure." "Hey?" "What is it that you understood and I didn't?" "It is a very normal thing." "You won't understand." "Do one thing." "Do all the household chores." "If you need anything XYZ..if you need anything, don't call me." "Okay?" "Go." "Oh!" "Today you.." "Don't torture me, girl." "Get aside." "Let me watch the cartoon." "Why do you always keep watching cartoons?" "If you want to watch, then watch me." "Why?" "Are you a cartoon?" "Don't talk nonsense." "You are a grown-up." "It doesn't suit you to watch the.." "..cartoon and play with children." "If you want to watch, then watch this." "If you watch this.." "..you will understand why you should watch this." "By the way, you can watch, but you are ignoring it.." "..inspite of watching it, I can see that." "Because you are not watching what you should watch.." "..and you are watching what you shouldn't watch." "What did uncle see in you after all?" "At least he should have seen whether.." "..you have the sense to see or not." "See!" "ChiII!" "ChiII!" "ChiII!" "Why do you always scare me?" "Oh, no." "Show me." "Good." "I am naughty." "Naughty." "Yeah." "Where has she gone?" "Where has she gone?" "Come." "It's happening." "It's happening." "It's happening." "It's happening." "welcome." "Come in." "Look, I have decorated it nicely." "Have a look." "Huh?" "In which melody should I sing?" "Which new song should I sing?" "What should I do?" "Where should I go?" "What should I do?" "Where should I go?" "Where should I go?" "Where should I go?" "What should I play?" "What should I sing?" "Where should I go?" "You never drink." "What's wrong today?" "Nothing happened today." "I mean nothing happened today either." "I mean if you understand carefully.." "..nothing has happened till date." "Your hard work." "My hard touch." "And touch." "Nothing happened." "The camel is better than me." "It walks in sun." "It doesn't get water till a Iong distance." "But at Ieast that happens." "The he-cameI and she-cameI give each other company.." "..like this till far off." "With such a huge body, the elephant.." "..the he-eIephant does the program with.." "..the she-eIephant in the river." "Okay, forget the elephant." "Forget the elephant." "A mosquito." "I mean a he-mosquito also does a.." "..program with the she-mosquito." "That's why so many mosquitoes are born.." "..in so many places in the world, right?" "I don't want to discuss dogs." "But the dogs don't have a problem anywhere." "They can do anything anywhere." "They don't have any problem in the world." "But a man has to be very careful." "I mean the husband belongs to his wife." "But inspite of me being her husband.." "..why does she has an objection?" "It means I am her husband now, but I am still a virgin." "Oh, baby!" "Don't be so sad." "I will make you happy." "It's all about sIeep-waIking." "sleep walking." "Oh, yeah." "feel so sleepy." "sleepy." "Oh, my God!" "Where are you going?" "Come back." "feel my body." "Hey?" "No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "Just a second." "I mean this is not right." "I mean this is not done." "I mean this is.." "Hey?" "I see." "So you raped her finally." "No." "She respected me and handed over.." "..her respect to me respectfully." "And you took it?" "But it happened by mistake." "But you did take it." "Yes, but I was not in my senses." "You were drunk?" "Then why have you come to file a report?" "You are too much." "Look, a man is innocent while being drunk." "Whatever happens after it is good." "But I can't face my wife." "Then wash your face and go home." "Take a bath and go." "Look, I don't take a bath and come to do my duty." "I take a bath here and go home." "It means I am not raped?" "Buddy, men don't have any respect." "What are you saying?" "I mean they have respect, but it can't be snatched away." "Okay, tell me, how did it happen?" "actually I didn't know all this." "What?" "I didn't have the knowledge about it." "I see." "About that.." "Yes." "So I had gone there to study." "And you got impressed there?" "No, no, I had gone there to study." "You had gone there to read and returned after writing." "No, no, she made me write." "Who is she to make you write?" "It is He who writes." "He has written everything as to who will write where." "Look at me." "I don't know to write anything." "I didn't write anything till date." "Inspite of it, I have four children." "really?" "What really?" "It really is a case of goodness." "Look, the good thing is that that girl did it to you.." "..without any payment." "And you are better than her as you supported her.." "..to do such a good thing." "And I am better than both of you who is not filing this case." "Because the case is filed against the person.." "..who hurts someone." "Now if I go to that girl and ask.." "..Did this boy give you any pain?" "She will say, I didn't feel any pain, I enjoyed it." "Can I make a case of having fun?" "Isn't it interesting?" "So you also get up and have fun." "Dance, sing, laugh and make merry." "Did the railway train start, nephew?" "It happened, uncle." "But what happened, nephew?" "What I wanted to do didn't happen." "What was not happening has happened, uncle." "It has happened?" "Yes, it has happened." "You mean it has happened with a smile, right?" "Yes, by meeting each other." "Meeting each other?" "Yes." "Listen, honey." "Listen!" "What happened?" "What had happened between us during youth.." "..has happened with him now." "But what happened?" "Something good must have happened with a smile." "With a smile?" "Yes." "Come on, we will smile, too." "We had smiled in the morning with a smile." "What's the problem if you smile a little more?" "I have withered after smiling so much." "I can't read the newspaper as well." "Come on!" "Pass it to me." "Give here." "Pass it to me." "Pass here." "Oh, yes!" "Give it here." "Come on, hurry up!" "Make it fast." "Give here." "Pass it here." "Be quick." "Hurry up." "Pass it here." "Give it to me quickly." "Hurray!" "Oh, what are you doing, sister Gauri?" "Sister!" "Sister Gauri." "Yes?" "Come on, Iet's go and play." "Yes." "Come on." "Look, sister Gauri is sitting there." "Let's go to her." "Sister Gauri!" "Sister Gauri!" "Gauri!" "Sister Gauri!" "Hey, you are sitting here?" "And we searched high and Iow for you." "You ran away from us yesterday, too.." "..and now you are sitting here with a downtrodden face." "You didn't come to play with us either." "Why?" "What's wrong?" "You know that rude guy." "I felt very bad seeing him with that girl." "I was felt like strangling him." "really?" "But I wonder why I was feeling so strange." "I know." "He is your toy." "Whether you play with him or not, it's your wish." "But you can never bear if someone else plays with him." "Yes." "Why are you breaking things?" "Gauri, what's wrong with you?" "Are you all right?" "I am fine, grandma." "But he has gone crazy." "You know my husband!" "He was hugging that girl before my sight." "So my fears have come true at last." "You are at fault." "Why are you blaming the others?" "Grandma, you are also taunting me?" "No, I am not taunting you, I am explaining it to you." "That's why I used to tell you to give up your childishness." "I didn't have a grip on your grandpa for.." "..40 years without making any efforts." "I used to dress up and adorn myself before he returned home." "He used to start roaming around me as soon as he returned." "He used to call me his sweetheart and darling." "Now you go home and adorn yourself as well." "Look, apply kohI in your eyes, grace the head adornment.." "..deck a flower braid in your tresses.." "..wear bangles in your hands and bedeck yourself." "And as soon as he comes, blush and touch his feet." "Then watch how he will get attracted to you." "He will not even glance at anyone else." "Yes." "really?" "Of course." "Oh, grandma!" "Hi." "You have come." "Gauri." "Yes." "You have come." "Gauri, please don't do this." "please." "I want to tell you something." "I also want to tell you something." "But you say it first." "Gauri, what should have happened here.." "..happened elsewhere." "And what happened elsewhere.." "..it can't happen here." "I fell in love with somebody else." "I am here." "And my mind is elsewhere." "I won't like it." "And it will be unfair to you, too." "I can be unjust neither to you nor to myself." "But listen.." "You said what you had to say." "When it was my turn to tell you.." "..you left without listening to me." "although late." "But I understood what you mean." "beloved." "beloved." "although late." "But I understood what you mean." "beloved." "beloved." "My arms call out to you." "Don't go away." "beloved." "beloved." "although late." "But I understood what you mean." "What happened?" "What happened?" "beloved." "beloved." "It was my immaturity." "I was a bit ignorant, too." "I recognized your love today." "Do justice." "Forgive me." "I realized your love today." "My arms call out to you." "Don't go away." "beloved." "beloved." "although late." "But I understood what you mean." "beloved." "beloved." "There are a few smoldering desires." "There are a few yearning needs." "Your heart is now my lair." "I crave for you all the time." "There is a sweet burning sensation in my breaths." "I have to win your love now." "My arms call out to you." "Don't go away." "beloved." "beloved." "although late." "But I understood what you mean." "beloved." "beloved." "beloved." "beloved." "beloved." "beloved." "beloved." "Sharon." "Where did she go?" "Hi." "Are you leaving for somewhere?" "It's time to move on." "And what about me?" "Happy." "I wish you all the happiness." "No." "I cannot be happy without you." "Don't you love me?" "Of course, I do." "You are my very special friend." "But I am a wanderer." "A free spirit." "Can you capture the wind in your hand?" "No." "What about what transpired between us?" "That was fun." "What?" "Why?" "Didn't you enjoy it?" "Yes." "Look, Happy." "Whatever lessons of love you learnt from me.." "..take them to your wife." "And make her happy." "It's time to go." "Bye." "Bye." "Bye, Happy." "Love you." "Learned people say.." "In a particular year, in a particular month.." "..on a particular day, when you make love.." "..to a particular girl in a particular way.." "..you will attain bliss." "But in London, in America, everybody is doing it." "And they are doing very well." "So what's the problem here?" "Foreigners have affairs." "They get married." "They get divorced." "They get divorced." "They don't get divorced." "But they do that thing for which they do all this." "If I do something.." "..why does this happen?" "I Ieft her." "She left me." "Where do I go?" "Stop." "I have stopped." "Gauri, stop." "You think I am Gauri?" "I am not going anywhere." "Sister." "Where are you going?" "Sister, stop." "Sister." "Sister." "Where are you going?" "Stop." "Gauri." "Gauri." "You fool." "You were going to commit suicide." "Now your life is mine." "You don't have any right to lay down.." "..your life which is now mine." "What are you blabbering?" "You had left me, right?" "Yes." "I had left you." "Now I have understood the difference between love and lust." "I understood it quite late." "only love can understand love." "What happened to you, uncle?" "Nothing." "For the first time, I am shedding tears of joy." "Go away." "You don't love me." "I Iove you." "That's why I tried to love you so much." "I suffered." "And you went on tormenting me." "So what if I tormented you?" "So what if you tormented me?" "You won't change." "I should jump." "No." "I won't torment you now." "please." "Let's play." "Again play." "You are still obsessed about games." "Not that game." "I am talking about the game that leads to procreation." "And the game that people play for procreation." "That game?" "Yes." "It's happening." "It's happening." "It's happening." "Our time begins now." "Why are you crying?" "I won't drink more milk." "It's not for you." "It's for the kids." "hold it." "And who are you for?" "For you." "What name have you decided?" "You decide." "Don't name him Happy." "His stomach will be like this if he is very fat." "You are so naughty."