"Alf: on the last episode of alf..." "Lynn: i think i'd rather sit next to jake." "Alf: who's dudley?" "This guy that i used to take a bath with..." "Oh, ha ha ha!" "I smuggled you some dessert." "Oh, goody, goody, goody, goody, goody!" "What is it?" "Guess." "Rubber vomit." "Pumpkin jello." "I have to get back to the ochmoneks." "While uncle rocky is carving the turkey," "Mr. And mrs." "Ochmonek are going to be singing das cornucopia" "From wagner strauss' der feaster famine." "It's an ochmonek tradition." "Well, thanks for the warning." "I'll watch for breaking glass." "Thanks, operator." "Happy thanksgiving." "Alien task force." "Sergeant fox speaking." "Hello." "I think i've just seen an alien." "What do i do?" "Captioning made possible by lions gate home entertainment" "Hello." "Ruff!" "Ruff!" "There's, uh, no need to pretend." "I'm not going to hurt you." "I'm sure you're not going to hurt me." "Ruff!" "Ruff!" "Oh!" "It's ok." "I'm friendly." "So are you." "[Whimpering like a dog]" "Look, i know you can talk." "I heard you." "Ruh-Roh." "Relax." "I'm a friend of willie's." "Your that bum who's been hanging" "Around our trashcans." "Hey!" "Bums have friends." "How do you know willie?" "I was talking to him just, uh, uh, a minute ago." "Ahem." "About this tall," "Glasses, social worker." "That's willie." "Well, he's the one" "Who told me to come in here" "And keep you company." "Willie told you about me?" "Ah, well, not specifically," "Which planet you're from, but, uh," "I figure it's a cold planet" "Because of your fur." "You're feet are suited to a muddy terrain." "They're probably reddish-Brown" "So that you'd blend in." "Your large ears" "Suggest a thin atmosphere" "That doesn't transmit sound waves very well." "And the big nose indicates" "A scarcity of oxygen." "Hey!" "Watch the wise" " Cracks" "About the schnoz." "Uh, sorry." "No offense intended." "It's a lovely schnoz." "Thank you." "Your's is nice, too." "Thank you." "So, let's see." "I'd" "I'd guess you were from planet..." "K-171." "K-171." "Oh, you mean neesbeck." "Ha!" "There's no intelligent life on neesbeck!" "How do you know?" "I've been there." "Their national bird is dust." "Well, then what planet are you from?" "Melmac." "But don't spread it around, ok?" "You can trust me." "Good." "You have any idea what would happen" "If people found out about me?" "I can't imagine." "Have you ever heard of the alien task force?" "Alien task force..." "No, i don't believe i have." "What do they do?" "Well, they hunt down innocent aliens" "And do bad, bad things to them." "How do you know?" "Interstellar grapevine." "[Raquel singing in german]" "[Singing in german]" "So we're cool about this alien thing, right?" "By the way, name's alf." "Heh!" "Hi, alf." "Name's pete finnegan." "[Telephone rings]" "Uh, pete." "What?" "[Rings]" "Your coat is ringing." "Oh, yeah." "Uh..." "Willie said i could" "Borrow the phone." "Uh, hello?" "Finnegan, sgt." "Fox." "Did you make contact with the alien?" "Oh, hi..." "Mom." "Uh, nice of you to call." "Everything's fine here." "Fox: good." "We're mobile." "We'll be there asap." "Well, and a happy thanksgiving to you, too, mom." "Can it hear you now?" "Yes, my friends are right here," "And they're terrific" "So friendly." "It may act friendly, but it could be deadly." "I just hope we can take it alive." "Oh, i don't think it'll be necessary to..." "Kill it." "That turkey's been our pet for years, mom." "That's our call, mr." "Finnegan." "You just keep it occupied until we get there." "Ahem." "What's his name?" "Who?" "Your turkey!" "Sgt. Fox." "Oh, he has a certain..." "Military bearing." "[Overlapping chatter]" "I'm so hungry i could faint." "Dog biscuit?" "They're good." "Strike 3." "Nice shot, jason." "Martin and i believe that it's important" "To encourage a child to develop athletically" "As well as intellectually." "Off to a good start." "Excellent squash, incidentally." "The colors are spectacular." "Green sky, orange clouds." "Actually, those colors should be reversed." "I used one of those cheapo, 12-Second photo places." "Oh!" "Oh!" "And this is me and my buddies" "In the orbit guard." "The melmackian orbit guard." "Here's our motto" ""To guard the orbits" "Whether they need it or not."" "Did they?" "Did they what?" "Need guarding." "Well, no, not really." "All we had were minor scuffles." "Name calling, mostly." "Sounds like a pretty peaceful place." "It was..." "Until that pesky nuclear explosion." "Nuclear explosion?" "How did that happen?" "No one's quite sure." "That's why i left the military." "I just didn't believe that anything" "Was worth blowing up a planet for." "So what did you do in the military?" "Oh, space research, mostly." "Sort of our version of the orbit guard." "Well, we have a lot in common" "Orbit guards," "Not having a home," "Sweet potato pie." "Are you the one who left the food out for me?" "Yeah." "Thanks." "I really appreciate that." "Thank you." "Why did you leave the milk out in saucers?" "Uh..." "I like cats." "Cats are great." "Over the years, i've had lots of cats." "Me, too." "[Telephone rings]" "You ought to get an answering machine in your pants." "[Ring]" "Hello?" "Fox: finnegan, we're about 30 minutes away." "30 minutes?" "Gee, uh, mom.." "You ought to let that simmer for at least 45." "What did you find out?" "Is it armed?" "Is it dangerous?" "Weapons, war, fighting" "Is that all you ever think about?" "Lighten up, mom." "Ok, when we're ready to move in," "We'll call and let your phone ring once." "You got that?" "Just one ring." "That'll be your signal to vacate the premises." "We'll take it from there." "How's mom?" "Getting on my nerves." "Brian: hey, alf!" "Have you seen the peanut butter?" "Alf, who's that?" "Oh, this is my new friend pete finnegan." "Flakey, this is brian tanner" "And jake ochmonek." "You call him flakey?" "He who is without flakiness" "Cast the first stone." "Nice to meet you two." "Alf, you're not supposed to let strangers in the house." "Relax, brian, the flakemeister's" "Not going to tell anyone i'm an alien." "He's a friend of willie's." "Oh, yeah?" "You know mr." "Tanner?" "Oh, yeah, sure." "Very well." "Matter of fact, this is his sweater." "What happened to your thanksgiving dinner?" "Uncle rocky's still carving it." "Come on, brian, let's go spoil our appetites." "Nice to meet you both." "Yeah, likewise." "The turkey is delicious, raquel." "And perfectly sliced." "Turkey is an aphrodisiac." "How is everything over there?" "They're ok, i guess." ""They"?" "Alf and that flakey pete guy." "Flakey pete the bum?" "The homeless person?" "Yeah, he's over at your house with alf." "He said he was a friend of yours." "We've had a lovely time, raquel." "Yes." "Absolutely lovely." "Come on, kids." "Alf!" "Oh, hi, willie." "Where is he?" "Who?" "Your little alien guy?" "If anything--Anything has happened to him," "You're going to be" "Hey, willie." "Alf!" "Willie!" "Alf!" "Willie!" "Alf!" "Willie!" "Alf!" "Willie!" "Alf!" "Willie?" "We were worried sick about you." "Really?" "Were you throwing up and everything?" "Well, no, but we're very relieved you're all right." "Willie, get your camera." "We want to preserve this moment of caring." "Never mind about my camera." "What are you doing in the house with a stranger?" "Chatting, snacking," "Swapping war stories." "Alf, this is dangerous!" "How much does he know about you?" "Why would you let him in here?" "!" "He's your friend!" "And any friend of yours" "He's not my friend!" "You two have a tiff?" "Alf, haven't i told you this?" "Never, never" "Oh, lighten up, willie!" "It's fappiano." "Besides, aren't you always telling me that" "Under the skin" "Or in my case, fur" "Or in pete's case," "A ratty overcoat" "We're all pretty much the same?" "A little needy," "A little insecure," "But decent and good." "Listen..." "Alf is stranded here." "He doesn't have any place else to go." "I know he looks like an alien to you," "But he--He's a member of our family." "We've got to protect him." "We can't let anything happen to him." "Do you understand?" "Yeah." "I do." "Could you stay and..." "Have a little supper with us?" "It may not be much." "If fact, i can guarantee it won't be much," "But you're welcome." "Well, thank you," "But i really think i ought to go." "Aw, please!" "Please!" "Please!" "Please!" "Please!" "We've got cold meatloaf" "And rubber vomit." "Good news-- There's turkey after all." "Well, turkey franks." "Oh, well..." "Maybe i could stay for a minute." "Please." "Hey, now, flakeonomy," "Isn't this what it's all about?" "Good food and good friends." "Well, good friends, anyway." "I'm going to be in a thanksgiving play" "At wallace park tomorrow." "You can come if you want." "Oh, gee," "I think i'll probably be busy tomorrow." "Wish you could see my play, alf." "Me, too, brighton beach." "Oh, wait a minute," "We have a little surprise for you guys." "Yeah!" "Let me guess" "A basket of imported calicoes!" "No, it's an empty picnic basket." "An empty picnic basket?" "What good is that?" "It's specially designed" "To enable you to view brian's play" "Without being seen." "It was my idea." "Give credit where credit is due." "Aw, you guys are the greatest." "We'll go over your lines after dinner." "I don't want to be embarrassed in front of the other parents." "[Telephone rings]" "Lynn: i'll get it." "Hello?" "Hmm, they must have hung up." "Uh, if you'll excuse me," "I think i'd better go wash my hands." "Don't be long!" "These turkey franks'll be ready in exactly 40 seconds." "Kate: all right let's sing the thanksgiving hymn." "Brian: * we gather together *" "All: * to ask the lord's blessing * * he chastens and hastens * * his will to make known * * the wicked oppressing... *" "Well, ah, ready to go." "What's the setup?" "Is he inside?" "What?" "Is wh-- Is who inside?" "The alien." "I'm the alien!" "What?" "Yep, yep, yep." "Yeah, you caught me." "I'm from outer space." "Neesbeck to be exact." "I want to thank you guys for coming on such short notice." "I really appreciate it." "You have a bowl of mercury i can drink?" "I don't believe this" "Another bum looking for a hot meal." "We missed the end of the game for this." "Forget it pal." "We've got your name in our database." "Don't ever call us again." "Out!" "[Grumbles]" "Where you going?" "I can prove i'm from neesbeck." "Our national bird is dust!" "All: * we all do extol thee * * thou leader triumphant * * and pray that thou still... *" "Everything all right?" "Everything's great, thanks." "* ...congregation escape tribulation * * thy name be ever praised * * o, lord, make us free *" "We pilgrims are townsfolk." "We know not of the outdoors." "How can we survive in this wilderness?" "Yo, pilgrim." "Oh, he's so cute." "He's ruined my feather duster." "My best belt." "Who are you?" "Squanto the indian." "The last of the patuxet." "You speak english?" "Many moons ago," "I was captured by the white man" "And taken across the great waters" "To the old world." "But i missed my people." "How did you get back here?" "I rented a car." "Alf." "I took a cab." "Alf." "I don't remember." "What's important is that i'm here." "We are so different from you." "Ah, do not be embarrassed" "Because your skin is a funny color" "And you wear stupid clothes" "The great spirit says that we're all" "Brothers under the skin." "And come the next full moon," "We will celebrate the bountiful harvest together." "And so it came to pass," "There was a bountiful harvest and reason for giving thanks." "And someday there'll be college football," "And department stores," "And a parade with a giant inflatable underdog." "Alf, that's not your cue." "In 1620, a hardy band of pilgrims" "Came to america" "In search of religious freedom and boundless opportunity." "Since then, millions have come here" "For the same reasons from all over the world." "And one from melmac" "Who crashed into a garage." "Well, now, if you need anything," "You got my card." "Oh, thanks, but i'll be fine." "Are you sure you can't stay?" "Oh, thanks, alf, but no." "I usually spend this time of year in florida" "Lots of rich widows with loose change" "And full of the holiday spirit." "Good-Bye, pete." "Bye, willie." "Bye." "Bye-Bye." "Bye-Bye." "Bye-Bye." "Bye, cornflake." "Bye, alf." "And thanks." "Gee, i hope he keeps in touch." "I'm sure he will." "He took our phone." "Captioning made possibly by lions gate home entertainment" "[Laughing]"