"Previously..." "Why do you always have to go to extremes?" "First it was taunting Casey and then breaking Rusty's nose." "And then, rubbing a townie in Frannie's face." " You're leaving." " It's just one month." " I love you." " I love you." "I'm with Max." "Why can't you find someone else is perfect for you?" "Because no other girl in the world compares to you." " It's old habits." " Old habits like having a great time together." "What does that tell you?" " It tells me that we can't be friends." " See you around." "I'm sorry for the douche move." "I knew you wanted her first and I made my move anyway." "Last night, under the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel" "I fell for you." "What do you think about this one?" "For dinner with Jordan or Desert Storm?" "Crap." "Why are you sweating this date?" "You ve been together for a week already." "I'm sure she knows by now you can't dress yourself." "This is different." "This isn't just hanging out." "This is a real date." "At a restaurant." "With reservations." "I even borrowed Casey's car." "Hey, is this still stylish?" "Was it ever?" "She just got out of a relationship with Andy, who dresses like a pop star." "And now she's dating me." "So I gotta step it up." "The crucial first real date." "Always awkward." "You know, I usually take the band-aid approach." "Rip the damn thing off, let the scab heal, and move on to the next one." "It's gonna be intimate." "Candlelit." "Amazing." "And scab-free." "And if everything goes well, you can stay at Jordan's" " and I can sleep in your room tonight." " Let's not get ahead of ourselves." "I thought things quieted down since Griffin and his girlfriend broke up." "They did." "But Griffin's getting over his heartbreak with a steady rotation of Tri-Pis." "You have no idea how much those girls love dirty talk." "Now instead of living in a porno, t's like I'm listening to the director's audio commentary." "If you need it, Dale's at a barn-raising this weekend trying to convert some Amish people so his bed's open." "Yeah, the futon's OK." " That one's not bad." " Really?" "Not bad, as in:" ""I'm so happy this guy is my amazing new boyfriend", not bad?" "Exactly." "It's Dale's." "Really shows it off, right?" "You might want to wear a jacket." "You know, I have to say, as weird as it is to be the one who's not going out tonight, watching the "getting ready" routine from this point of view is quite interesting." "Where's my sculpting gel?" "Jenny, you're a fricking klepto!" "And a little scary." "You know you love it." "You sure you don't want to come out with me?" "We're gonna go see some movie called 9 1/2 Weeks at the Titan." "And be the third wheel to a soft-core porn trip to the movies?" "Thanks, but not my style, Ash." "Bye, Jessicas!" "Don't drink too much." "Are you sure?" "Cause I hate the thought of you spending another night alone." "No way." "Since Max's been gone, I've gotten so much done." "Cleaning, organizing." "I'm thinking about taking up an instrument." "Besides, Max is gonna call me any minute and then it's going to be two hours of catching-up talk, followed by... gross-when-it's-other-people but-cute-when-it's-you phone smooching." "Melinda, Hilary." "Remember, sex isn't love!" "All right, if you say so." "Well that sucks." ""OK." "Love you."" "Don't you just love long, scalding hot showers, they're so invigorating!" "Totally." "So, Betsy, what are you up to tonight?" "I'm just going out to dinner with Vince." "What about you?" "I don't know." "I guess I might just hang out at the house." "Watch TV or something." "Really?" "Do they still have television on Friday nights?" "I think so." "Do you want to join us?" "=Greek 220=- "Isn't It Bro-mantic"" "Timing:" "Kappa Team" " Yeah, how're you doing?" " Good." "This is a really nice restaurant." "I know, they have reservations and everything." "I told you our first date was going to be special." "I thought you meant we'd sneak wine coolers into a movie or something." "May I help you?" "Reservation for two, please." "Under Cartwright, Russell." "I'm sorry, I'm not seeing anything here, Mr. Russell." "It's under Cartwright." "Russell's my first name." "Then why'd you say it second?" "I was... just being fancy." "We're preparing your table now, Mr. Cartwright, Russell." "Miss?" "Can you make sure it is your finest table?" "It's the only table we have left." "Wonderful." "Rusty, this is so sweet." "Thank you." "It's just you and me, and the romantic ambiance... and my sister." "Isn't that one of our pledges?" "So hot, man." "So hot." "You're missing quite the story in there." "Griff's Tri-Pi broke out a leather riding crop." "The riding crop." "I remember it well." "It was after the role playing, but before the toe sucking." "Good times." "I don't know why he wants to be a dermatologist because he obviously has such a jump start on gynecology." "Stop by around 3:00 this morning and ask him." "I'm sure we'll be up." "You know, I gotta run right now, but listen, maybe later we'll reopen that roommate request you'd asked about." "Yeah, Ev." "That'd be great." "Hang in there, man." " Mind if I crash your study spot?" " Yeah, Grant." "Pull up a chair." "That is, if you don't mind studying in the middle of a bachelor party." "It must get tedious for you, to listen to those hook up stories from all the brothers." "Whatever." "It's like watching an episode of Entourage." "Except cheaper." "And actually watchable." "But you don't feel isolated?" "Sometimes, but... it's a cross I have to bear being the only gay guy at Omega Chi." "Not necessarily..." "Marco?" "I so knew that Men's Fitnesssubscription had nothing to do" " with his flabby calves." " Not Marco." "Pierre?" "I thought he was just really French." "You?" "There it is." "Does anyone else in the house know?" "No, just you." "I've told a few friends from back home." "But I'm just not ready to announce it to the world yet." "That's great, man." "I don't know what to say." "Welcome to gay." "I hope I'm ready." " Who's your favorite singer?" " Britney." " Movie?" " Hairspray?" "Fashion designer?" "Too slow." "Thanks for playing." "No, but two out of three on your GaySaTs?" "You'll be fine." "It's so crowded in here." "I called for these reservations a couple of hours after our Art History midterm." "That's great." "I love it." "I'm so glad that..." "Sorry!" "Nothing to see there." "Please enjoy your night." "How long have you been together now?" "Six months last Tuesday!" "That's great." "I'm proud of you two." "It must make not drinking a lot easier when you have a partner who's an alco... not drinking." "Vince had to give his chip back." "I said I was sorry." "He went to a CRU game last week and ran into his old friend, Mr. Vodka." "But it's fine." "It's fine, really!" "It's fine." " Would you look at all these salads." " You know what's a funny word?" " Radicchio." " Well, everybody makes mistakes." "See?" "She gets it." "Why can't you?" "Radicchio is a funny word." "Let's not talk about it, OK?" "It's called Anonymous for a reason." "You didn't have a problem blabbing to my mom about it." "I never said anything about you being drunk." "She asked where you were and I said, "Asleep in the bushes."" "You guys, let's order." "Let me start with our specials." "We have a Penne ala Vodka." "That sounds good." "You are never gonna change!" " I gotta..." " Go." "So... can I start you off with an appetizer?" "That was bad." "It's OK, Casey." "It wasn't your fault." "No, they just left." "They were my ride." " We can give you a ride." " Really?" " That's so sweet." " But we haven't ordered yet." "It might be awhile." "That's OK, neither have I." "Have you seen how many salads they have on the menu?" "I can't decide!" "Maybe we could order a few different ones and then we can all share?" "Alice, right?" "You were in my Econ class last semester." "It's been a while." " Kha'y." " Kha'y." "It's good to see you." "Amphoras!" "Kha'y!" "I'm pleased to say that the Alumni and I have been impressed with each and every one of... you." "Tonight we give you your final task before we leave you to make of the Society what you will." "It is a Rite of Passage." "It is a task of critic..." " Grand Master Bowman?" " Mr. Cappie, does this question pertain to the Amphora Society?" "Is it relevant to our centuries-old tradition, and not just something about a society mascot, or if Joshua Jackson and/or Paul Walker will be speaking to the group?" "Yes, sir." "The first one." "The centuries-old tradition one." " What's your question?" " Thank you very much, sir." "I was wondering..." "Is there a secret dry cleaner for these robes?" "Just because, you know," "I don't really wanna get that out there in the... in the general public." "Plus, they do such a good job there at the... cleaners." "So, I was wondering, did... if you know of a place?" "You are the most... accomplished, and promising students at CRU..." "Believe me, if I could shoot myself a quizzical look, I would right now." "But tomorrow night, we will ask you to tell us about the people behind those impressive resumes by performing the traditional Amphora Emotional Purge." "In an effort to strip away the psychological masks and safeguards that would prevent your fellow Amphoras from knowing your true selves, you will stand before us and reveal everything." " Naked party." " Your disappointments, your mistakes, your embarrassments, your worst secrets and your most agonizing emotional heartaches." "Be prepared." "We'll see you then." "It sounds like we're about to get to know each other really fast." "I guess it comes with a secret society." "Know what else comes with a secret society?" "Me." "Hi, I'm Cappie." "Don't tell anybody." "It's a secret." "If I would've known she'll be here, I'd have suggested roller skating." "Well, for future reference, you should know" "I'm wicked at skee-ball and ass at air hockey." "Despite everything, I still had fun." "Really?" "Yeah." "I was with you." "You're so great." "I'm so sorry!" "I slipped." "Please." "Go back to..." "You know." " Oh, my god." " See you tomorrow." "I'm not sure Jordan liked the movie." "You couldn't just taken a cab home from the restaurant?" " But this is my car." " It was the worst first date ever." "First dates are always terrible." "I treat them like a band-aid and..." "Rip them off." "Yeah, I know." "I get it." "Let's just go." "You know, it's still pretty early." "You want to go bowling or something?" "Are you being serious right now?" " Dobler's?" " Let's go." "Are you mad at me or something?" "Oh my God, have you seen this movie 9 1/2 Weeks?" "So there's this scene where the mom from 8 Mile strips to this song..." "I think I've just reached my threshold." "Sorry, Ash," "I can't stomach any more straight sex stories." "Right." "Griffin." "Sorry." "So tell me about your night." "You know, nothing too exciting." "Hung out at the house, studied a little bit," " and a brother secretly came out to me." " Was it Marco?" "Oh my God, 'cause he's my pick in our "Next to Come Out at Omega Chi" pool." " His nails are nicer than mine." " I'm not telling you." "Because you're the one who outed me." "And every time you out a guy to his house," " a fairy loses its wings." " No!" "Come on, you have to tell me." " I learned my lesson." " Nope." "Tell me please." " Tell me, I'm dying." " All right, fine." "It's not Marco." " It's Grant." " What?" " Yeah." " It's always the hot ones." "Anything happen after that?" "What?" "Because we're both gay, we have to hook up?" "No." "Because Grant's awesome." "And..." "You guys would make the cutest couple." "Well, Grant does have a few of the..." "OK, all the qualities I look for in a prospective boyfriend." "But you know what they say, you can't have gay sex where you eat." "Then don't screw around in the kitchen." "Not gonna happen." "He hasn't come out to the rest of the house." "Why not?" "Omega Chi is fine with you being gay." "Yeah, one gay." "I mean, two of us hooking up?" "That's when they have to start worrying about having next year's Rush underneath a rainbow banner." "Stop making excuses." "Fisher and I were worried about how ZBZ would handle our relationship." "But we came out to everyone and now everything's great." "Yeah, This isn't really the same thing." "Fine, don't go after the hot guy you have tons in common with." "Your loss." "And his." " Hi!" " Hey, Case." "You want me to call Jordan over?" "You can ruin breakfast for us, too." "OK, so maybe your first date wasn't the best date ever, but from where I was sitting it looked pretty romantic." "And where you were sitting was very, very close." "You can't be mad at me." "No, I love having my sister go on dates with me." "It's not that big of a deal!" "Remember when Charlie Adams took you to see Planet of the Apes with Mark Wahlberg and I begged Mom to make you take me because I wanted to see it so badly?" " No!" "It's not the same..." " Yes." "The only thing different, is that you didn't get yourself sick on Sno-Caps and Mr. Pibb." "I'm so sorry, Rusty." "It's fine." "You've got to let me make it up to you." "How about a fun brother-sister mall day?" "We could have lunch, shop," "I can help you pick out some new shirts that are a little more  of the same because your shirts are so handsome!" "What do you say?" "I gotta meet Jordan for coffee in a little bit and I've got stuff to do at the house all day." "What about Sunday?" "Yeah." "Maybe." "What about brunch?" "Great!" " Sounds like a plan." " Great." "I'll call you." ""I'll call you." Great, brunch." "Alice in Wonderland." " Cappie, hi." " Hello." "You ready for tonight?" "Have you taken full inventory of your scarred psyche?" "I just had a conference call with all my therapists, even the one from when I was five." "And apparently, I used to cheat at Candyland!" "Kinda damaging." " What's going on, guys?" " Evan, hi!" "Cappie and I were discussing tonight's Emotional Purge." "That's funny..." "But listen," "I don't think the three of us should be standing around like this in public." "Because The Amphoras have a big presence in the Defense Department." "So a missile... could just, you know... come on and hit us at any moment." "Just..." "So, Evan, have you thought about what you're gonna say tonight?" "I'm not sure if I trust everyone in the group with my deepest, darkest secrets, so..." "We're all feeling that." "I'm sure you'll be great." "And I'm officially late for student government." "But I'll see you guys later tonight!" " You not find me trustworthy?" " You find that surprising?" "What makes you think I'm gonna purge secrets to Evan Chambers?" "Why do you feel the need to call me by my full name every time we talk?" "I like it." "It makes you sound like a comic book villain." "So why don't you trust me, Evan Chambers?" "Don't know, you just apologized for cutting in on Casey, now you're doing the same thing with Alice." " Is that trustworthy?" " Stop crying, Evita." "Firstly, Alice and I were talking, not picking out window treatments." "And second, you did not see her before me." "I seem to recall my hood being pulled off first." "You're unbelievable, you know that?" "You saw us and had to swoop in." " It's like a compulsion." " Your face is like a compulsion." " That doesn't even make sense." " Your face too." "Stop acting like a child." "Is someone projecting his insecurities on to me?" "Please, Cap." "I have no problem competing with you for Alice." "She obviously prefers someone with a little ambition." "You know, like everyone else in the Society except for you." "First I'm not trustworthy and now I'm the runt of the Society?" "Evan Chambers you dastardly menace!" "You've got me questioning everything!" "Rusty totally blew me off." " I thought he asked you to brunch?" " Yeah, "brunch"." "That's like Cartwright family code for:" ""I don't want to talk right now"." " Are you going to be OK, Case?" " Uh-huh." "Uh-huh, as in "yes," or uh-huh, as in," ""keep asking me questions until you figure out what's bothering me"?" "When did this happen?" "I've become the Rusty and he's become the Casey?" "I think you're just lonely, Case." "Which is what happens when your boyfriend runs off to England for, like, ever, trying to harness the sun's..." "Whatever for spacey stuff." "Long distance is hard." "Remember me with Travis?" "I was out of my mind." "I even joined the Curling team, until I realized it had nothing to do with hair." "You guys did long distance for years." " Max's been gone for three weeks." " Stop it!" "And you're not Rusty." "You have much, much daintier features than him!" " Except his hands." " You know what?" "You're right." "I'm not Rusty." "I have lots of friends." "I'm the Pledge Educator," "I have, like, 20 friends I'm supposed to be hanging out with right now." " It's like, my job." " Exactly!" "Now go force those Pledges to spend the night with you." "I didn't mean it like that." " Hi." " Hi!" "You're in a good mood." "I was worried." "Why would you worry?" "You seemed a little flustered at the end of our date." "Are you kidding?" "I always have my sister and her angry friends crash my first dates." "It's called lowering your expectations." "You'll see on our second date how much it pays off." "OK, well, now that I know your secret, you're really gonna have to wow me." "It's not that original, but there's a bunch of bands playing at the Union tonight." "Wanna go?" " I'd love to, but I can't." " What?" "Why?" "Casey just sent a text to pledges." "She's calling a mandatory game night at the house." "Come on." "I think I've found a solution to your roommate problem." "You castrated Griffin?" "That probably would've been easier than finding someone willing to live with, but no." "I found you a new room." "Seriously?" "How?" "First I talked to Trip and convinced him since they're both Econ majors, it made sense for him to move in with Benny." "Now, Marco's had his eye on Roosevelt's single." "He won't shut up about how he needs more closet space." "The man has more shoes than a Foot Locker outlet." "So I talked Roosevelt into moving in with Clyde, because, you know, they have the same water polo schedule." "I didn't know that." "But, OK." "Which left me with Clyde's roommate Aiden." "Who as it turns out, not only can sleep through anything, but is obsessed with porn." "It was a win-win." "And so, I'd like to present to you, Calvin Owens, your sanctuary of sex-free bliss." "It doesn't smell like wet rubber and candle wax!" "Yeah." "Anyway." "Sorry it took so long." "The house is a much happier place with you around." "Evan, this is incredible." "I owe you big time." "What are you doing tonight?" "Are you thinking wet rubber and candle wax?" "Thanks anyway, I got this thing I gotta go do." "But, rain check." "Wait a minute." "If I'm living in Trip's old room, that means my roommate is..." " Hey roomie!" " Grant!" "We're roommates." "How  unexpected." "We need to talk." "OK, but be quick." "I'm setting up for a pledge lock-in." "We're playing charades, and then a Hungry Hungry Hippos marathon." "You're doing it again." " Doing what?" " Ruing my date!" "I was supposed to take Jordan out to make up for last night's debacle and you're ruining it with your lock-in." " You've got to let her out of it." " But attendance is mandatory." "If I let Jordan out, I'd have to let everyone out." "So you could reschedule the lock-in later..." "Or you could just have your date another night, right?" "You owe me for ruing the last one!" "I didn't intentionally ruin it." "Don't you have anything better to do with your time?" "Sorry, Rus, it's already planned." "We've ripped up all the paper for charades and everything." "To cancel would be like slapping the rainforest in the face." "So you get your fun Saturday night and I get nothing?" "It's not about you, Rusty." "I need this lock-in for the pledges." "You're a smart, creative guy." "I'm sure you'll be able to figure out something you can do tonight." "Alice, good to see you, as always." "You look robe-tastic." " Thanks, Cappie." " "Robe-tastic." Clever." "Thank you, Evan." "Chambers." "Amphoras!" "Kha'y!" "It's time for the purge to begin." "Take your seats and remember," "These walls are sacred." "Do not hold back." "First up is Alice." "So, I guess I'll start with my childhood." "I grew up on a farm in rural Pennsylvania." "We always had tons of animals around because my mom thought that it would teach us about responsibility." "And my first pet was a gerbil, I named Miffy." "And I used to love to play this game where I'd just spin her around." "I called it Swing The Gerbil." "But one day, I  lost control and..." "Well I..." "I can still hear the crunch." "Sorry." "I also had a pet mouse, I named Elphaba who I took everywhere with me in my back pocket." "But unfortunately, my mom also thought having me do my own laundry would teach me responsibility and... well," "Elphaba couldn't really swim." "And since I was having such bad luck with smaller animals, my mother thought that she'd bring home something bigger." "And that's when she brought home Toto." "God, I hope Toto was a horse." "I loved that cat." " No." " He was just this big, sweet, warm ball of fur and I would kiss him and hug him and just squeeze him so tight." "Trying to show him how much I loved him." "But..." "One day I  guess I loved him too much." "Hair... no." "Baby..." "Thing with..." "A face?" "The Mirror Has Two Faces!" "Yes!" "What is that?" "Whoever's up for a cupcake break, follow me to the kitchen!" " What are you doing here?" " I'm breaking you out!" "I heard the bands at the Union are the best ever I don't want you to miss them." " I don't know." " Come on." "You can't seriously be turning me down for charades." " No, OK." " Put it down, come on." "We can't have cupcakes until we're all together!" "Traci, not yet." "Not until we're all together." " What are you so smiley about?" " Me?" "I'm just happy to be with you." "Yeah, me too." "Although I do wish I could see the look on Casey's face right now." " She's not going to be that mad, right?" " No." "Not at you, anyway." "You know," "I'm beginning to think this date is less about me and more about your sister." "No, no this date is all about you." "It's about us." "Getting you away from Casey is just a bonus." "You know I have three big brothers?" "As much as I love them and miss them, we fight all the time." "About everything." "We even fight over the remote for the TV." "But it's not really about the remote, it's just about the fighting, because that's what we do." "And I'm kind of starting to feel like yours and Casey's remote." "You're so not the remote." "You're more like the..." "whole entertainment center." "Fine..." "This purge has really got me thinking about us." "And..." "You totally saw Alice first." "You should go out with her." " Well... no, no..." " Yeah." "Well..." "No, because listen, I was out of line." "I would much rather see you with her than me." "It's funny." "We start talking again and  we end up fighting over the first pet-killing lunatic we meet." "It's like it's programmed in our DNA." " What's with that?" " I don't know." "Women always seem to complicate things." "Just the really interesting ones." "Amphoras!" "Please take your seats." " Kha'y!" " And..." "Kha'y." "And we'll continue with Mr. Cappie." "Well, ready to spill your guts in a roomful of strangers?" " I will if you will." " You're on." "OK, so when I was three,..." "To never again waking up to soft feminine moaning followed by the sound of Griffin grunting "checkmate."" "You got a new roommate." "Evan came through for me, I couldn't believe it." " There may be hope for him after all." " So who's the lucky guy?" "Grant." "Grant?" "!" "Hot Grant?" "Gay Grant that you supposedly can't date because of all the drama it might cause at Omega Chi?" "Yeah." "All three." "Too bad we didn't get a quad." "I guess it's a matter of time before you get your man hump on." "OK, first of all: "Man hump?" No." "And secondly, just because we're two gay guys doesn't automatically mean we can't control ourselves." "Please, come on." "It's human nature." "Two attractive people, at their sexual peak, living in such close proximity?" "I guarantee if Casey were a guy, she'd wake up in the middle of the night with a sheet, two comforters, and 123 pounds of me on top of her..." "Him..." "Hypothetical male Casey." "OK, anyways." "Grant and I are not like that." "It's going to be really refreshing to have a roommate who understands me." "At the very least, we'll have the cleanest room in the house." "You know, besides Marco." "Yes." "This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship." "Cal, I'm gonna head up." "Night." "A beautiful friendship based on doing it." "Night, Rus." "Bye." "There you are!" "And look who you're with." "Yeah..." "After that last charade, I came out to get some fresh air and ran into Rusty." "What a wonderful coincidence." "See you tomorrow." "Bye." "I can't believe you deliberately jeopardized my pledge night." "Sometimes people screw up other people's nights." "It happens." "I didn't screw up your night on purpose." "But what about tonight, when I pointed out that you were and you did nothing?" "Was that on purpose?" "I'm sorry, Rusty." "I guess I'm not as good at being alone as you are, OK?" " I don't like it." " I didn't like it either!" "So, now you're not alone and I am." "I guess everything's right in the world again." "Fellow Amphoras," "I want to congratulate you all on your complete honesty." "I have the utmost confidence that we are leaving the Amphora Society in worthy and capable hands." "Good luck to you all." "You both were unbelievable tonight." " Thanks, Alice." " Thanks, Alice." "Cappie, the way you opened up about your rootless childhood?" "And Evan, the battle you feel between your family and yourself?" "You both are so tortured!" "I just want to hug you." " No!" "Stop that." " You don't need to..." " Cappie's way more tortured than I am." " You're way more tortured." "You don't even know if you like your parents." "That's right." "You know, you are right." "I'm going to give them a call and talk it out right now." "That's..." " What?" "No." "You..." " Good night." "I feel like I have so much more inside me that I want to share." " Yeah I bet you do." " Would you want to take a long walk down by the river?" "No." "Maybe next week?" "I didn't get an answer from Dean Bowman about the dry cleaner thing, so..." " But..." " But we can..." " You know..." " If you want..." "OK..." " Hi." " No more meetings for you?" "Too bad." "I was getting used to your James Earl Jones impersonation." "The alumni will be around if you need us." " You gave quite the purge tonight." " Yeah, I purged my guts out." "Time for you to purge." "What am I doing here with all these driven, successfulover-achiever types?" "You're here, Mr. Cappie, because nothing teaches us more about who we are" "than seeing ourselves in the people we least expect." "No, I don't get it." "Crunches." "Awesome." "Just doing my nightly pre-bedtime crunches!" "I sleep better if I work off my nervous energy from the day!" "I didn't even get a chance to talk to you about this roommate craziness, it all happened so fast." "I hope you're cool with this new situation." "I've been trying to escape Trip and his snoring for months." "Yeah, man." "I'm the coolest." "Minty fresh cool." "Why wouldn't I be?" "It's just,I told you I was gay, I didn't want you to think" "I was gonna be forcing my gayness on you." "No..." "I wouldn't mind that." "I mean, if you had questions." "I would just try to answer them." "Great, because I'm all about boundaries." "I live for boundaries." " Great." " Great." "All right." "I am exhausted!" "Sleepy time." " Just gonna go to bed." " Me too." " After I hit the shower." " Yeah." "Hey guys, just checking on..." " We were just going to bed..." " Sleepy time..." " gonna take a shower." " Do some... crunches and..." "Have all this nervous energy." "That's cool." "I mean, that's good 'cause..." "It's important for roommates have the same sleep schedule..." "Glad you guys are hitting it off." " This guy..." " Match made in heaven." " Lovin' it." " Just lovin' it." "Well, as you were." "You know what?" "I just realized, I forgot..." "I left something... in the place where," "excuse me!" "Stupid Casey and her stupid lock in." "She's so stupid." "Spitter?" "You were saying "stupid" an awful lot there." "Figure out how to get through the next year without having to see my stupid sister." "Conflict in the Cartwright clan?" " Paging Danny Tanner." " So ridiculous." "Just because she can't be alone, she thinks it's fine for her to get in the way of me and Jordan." "Do you realize how many nights in high school" "I sat alone watching Joan of Arcadiawith my Mom while Casey went out with all of her friends?" "Joan of Arcadiawas the one with the Navy lawyers, right?" " No." "That's Jag." " Jag." "I watched that afterwards." "With my dad." "God, I missed a lot of great television by having friends." "I mean, she knows how much that sucked for me." "You'd think she'd be the one person who'd understand how important it is for me to have a social life." "Actually, you should be the one person who understands how much it sucks when you feel like you don't have one." "You're friends with her, can't you take her out to shoot pool or something?" "Sorry, buddy." "I don't think I'm the guy she's looking to spend time with." "God, I wish I'd gone to M.I.T." " What the hell is that?" " It's a school?" "In Mass..." "I'm so glad to see you." "Can I borrow your keys?" "I need to sleep at your place again." "Sure..." "Thanks, man." "See you at home." "See you, Cap!" "Are the Omega Chis hazing actives now?" "Look, before you say anything." "I'm sorry about the impromptu pledge night." "I know." "I let my needs come before other people's personal lives and from now on, all pledge events will be scheduled at least a week in advance." "OK, fine." "A month in advance." "That's gonna be hard, because I don't have an assistant," "I'm trying to apologize." "Right." "Please, go ahead." "I realized last night that maybe the reason you're so bad at being alone is because you haven't had to do it very much." "I thought I'd share something with you that helped me get through a lot of long nights." "Joan of Arcadia?" " Is this the one about the Navy?" " No." "It has angels in it." "It's a really good show." " Thanks, Rusty." " You're welcome." "I'm sorry I freaked out so much about my date." "Before me, Jordan was dating the star of the football team." "I have a lot to live up to." "Jordan wouldn't be with you if she didn't already think you were great." "Thank you." "You gonna be OK?" "I miss Max." "Ashleigh's busy with Fisher." "You've got a life." "I feel like my go-to's are just not very go-to-able right now." "But I'll be OK." "I'm actually thinking about getting one of those little purse dogs." "If you'd just told me that the other night," "I would've gone to Dobler's with you after you ruined my date." "Well, I probably would've taken a cab from Sabatino's instead of ruining your date if you told me about your intense, intense, but goundless insecurities" "Fair enough." "From now on, full disclosure." "Agreed." "Anything else you want to come clean about?" "Remember that blanket you used to have?" "The one that always smelled really funny?" "You want to know why?" "Maybe we don't have to tell each other everything... maybe we just start here and go forward." "OK." " I want to tell you." " I don't want to know." "It's not that bad." " It's not bad." " I don't want." "It's really not." "You're making it seem like it's so gross." " It's not that bad." " Get out of here."