"E. R." "Previously on E. R." " Where'd she go?" " Kisangani." " How long will she be gone?" " I hope just a couple weeks." "Everyone thinks I'm better suited for the lab." "Yeah, well, God forbid you disappoint them." "Mom, guess what." "Dad's here." " Oh, I failed my boards." " What?" "You're gonna be with Yuri and me." "Looking at the effects of ketamine on cerebral ischemia and tissue damage in mice." " What's happening to her?" " She's gonna be okay." "Give the medicine a chance to work." "That wasn't a real seizure." "The EEG doesn't lie." " I'm Abby Lockhart from Psychiatry." " I don't need a shrink." "Now I'm fighting to keep my son." "E. R. "ABBY NORMAL"" "The judge also said early July's looking good for a court date." "July?" "I'm trying to make it sooner." "Now, about the exchange this afternoon." " I need another day." " Kerry." "Get me another day." "Until the court determines a permanent arrangement you get two weekends a month..." " It's not enough." " ... at the discretion of the Lopezes." "I get to see my son at their discretion." "Does that make sense?" "The worst thing would be to violate the judge's order just as we're about to go into a custody hearing." "Mrs. Lopez will pick him up here at noon." " This isn't right." " No, it isn't." "But you'll get him back in two weeks." "Until then, you have to find a way to live with it." "Okay?" "Welcome to Chicago." "Please do not leave any personal belongings unattended at any time." "Thank you and enjoy your stay." "Daddy!" "Daddy!" "John?" "What if Watson had listened?" "Where would we be?" "No double helix, no genome theory." "The other way around, I believe." "Watson was a skeptic." " She's right." " Just get another ELISA cooking." "I've got one here." "Is this the right antibody?" " What are you doing?" " Starting over a new setup." "Just what we need, another med student with OCD." "We've checked all the reagents and run this how many times." " Seventeen." " Seventeen times." "Eighteen's my lucky number." "Why are you using a human anti-XIAP antibody with a murine substrate?" "Your protocol says to use anti-MXIAP, but this Eppendorf says anti-H." " You sure this is the right reagent?" " Do you have a boyfriend?" " What's that?" " Mnemonics." "I'm studying for the boards." " You haven't taken them yet?" " I liked them, so I figured I'd do it again." "Always go with TB." "If TB's an answer option, it's usually right." "Looks like they're ready for you in there." "Morning, dear." "Good morning." "Okay, Stanley's here." " George is here." " Hey, hey, who is he?" " We met last week." " I don't remember." "I sat right there." "We don't remember you." "George was referred by the ER." "He has a problem with" " Exhibitionism." " Let's see it." " I was over-sexualized at a young age." " Join the club." "I also have manic tendencies." "Where's Larry?" "Hello?" "Larry Jacobsen?" "Sad guy, talks about death a lot." " It ain't just talk." " What?" "He killed himself." "He took a bunch of pills, drank a bottle of gin slit his wrists and jumped into Lake Michigan." "Larry really wanted to be dead." "Man." "I" "Don't worry, dear." "You're really very good at this." " Yeah." "Everybody loves your sessions." " Yeah." "Everybody except Larry." "No, coach is fine." "I'm traveling with a baby." "Do you have a row with an empty middle seat?" "Do I need to book that right now?" "Okay." "Just hold on." "Elizabeth." "I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time." "I kept getting the machine." "I forgot to check the messages." "I have Ella's baby things." "Come in." "I took out all the girlie clothes." "There are some bibs, hats, pants, bootees." "My parents went mad for bootees after Ella was born." "Oh, this is one of my personal favorites." "Are you going somewhere?" "I have a friend in Seattle." "It's a cardiologist that I met in med school and she's just dying to meet Henry." "Wow." "You need a passport to fly to Seattle now?" "Yeah, I lost my license." "Thank you for dropping these off." "Are you all right?" "I'm fine." "Well, how long will you be gone?" "When will you be back?" "I'm not sure." "Kerry, don't do anything that you might regret later." "Thanks for the clothes." "What were you doing walking down Michigan Avenue with a sword?" "There were no buses." "Okay, I was more interested in the sword part." "The enemy is coming, but I will overwhelm him." " When he's" " What happened with the blood?" " Ask him." " Attack like the sea." " What happened with the blood?" " I was practicing for the battle royale." " On yourself?" " No, my guinea pig." "His name was Cookie." "Thank you for clearing that up." " I'd recommend taking him upstairs." " Gee, you think?" " Thanks for coming." " Twenty-nine-year-old woman..." " ... with tonic-clonic activity." " This isn't the first time." " Pulse ox, 98." " Gave her two of Ativan en route." " Did she hit her head?" " No, nothing like that." " Another two of Ativan" " Wait." "Hold it." "Hold it." " She doesn't need Ativan." " Abby, she's in status." " Did we see you last time?" " I tried to talk to your wife, Mr...?" " Dunn." " Dunn." "Haleh, take them to Trauma 1." "We'll be right there." " She's having factitious seizures." " Come again?" "She came in the same way last week and the EEG was negative." " She's faking?" " No." "It's a conversion disorder." " Was she hospitalized?" " No, they took off." " Can I try the husband?" " We'll up the oxygen, run some saline." " BP's 120 palp." " It's okay, Caroline." "No tongue biting or incontinence." "All right." "Let's up the O2 to five liters and run in 500 cc's of saline." " Saline?" " Let's see if it helps." " Is this the first seizure since last week?" " No." "She's been having three or four a day." "They usually stop, but not this time." " Pupils equal and reactive." " Mr. Dunn, can we speak outside?" "Jordan." "Jordan, squeeze my hand." "It's stopping." "Is she okay now?" " For now, yeah." " She needs a neurologist." "Your wife's condition is not neurological." "She's having pseudo-seizures." "We've been through this." "Did that look fake?" "I'm not saying that." "But last time Jordan was here, she had a normal CT and EEG." " Are you a psychiatrist or an ER doc?" " I'm a med student, actually." " Could I talk to a real live doctor?" " Of course you can." "But any doctor's gonna tell you the same thing I'm telling you." "If you want your wife to get better she's gonna need to be hospitalized in the Psych Ward." " Abby, do you have a minute?" " Sure." " Hi." "Dr. Nelson, please." " Have you spoken with Kerry lately?" "She was in this morning pretty quickly." "I'm concerned, and frankly, I don't know who else to talk to about it." "Is something wrong?" "Hi, could you ask him to come down to the ER?" "Lockhart." "I'm admitting a patient." "Thanks." "She seems extremely distressed." " Well, she's in mourning." " I know but I'm worried she's thinking of running off with him." "Henry?" " Maybe you should call her." " Me?" "I tried talking to her, couldn't get through." "Well, I'm sympathetic, but maybe we should ask someone..." " ... who's, you know, a closer friend." " Right." "Like who?" " Hey." " Hey." " How you doing?" " Good." "How's Alex?" "He wants to know if you got that plasma screen." " No, not yet." " Sorry I haven't called but I've just been, you know, trying to figure stuff out with Steve." "Sure." "I don't think he's gonna be staying too much longer." "We're not together, you know, me and Steve." "He sleeps on the couch." "There's a woman in 1 admitted for seizing." "Could you let me know if her husband's looking for me?" " See you later?" " Yeah." " How's it going?" " Never better." "Oh, my God." "What did you do?" "Oh, not much, some painting, redid the paneling." "I hung up those art-deco light fixtures that you liked from Marshall Fields." "Wait till you see the nursery." "Did you operate the screwdriver yourself, Mr. Fix-It?" "Oh, hey, I'm a nesting father-to-be." "I'll go to any lengths." "So this is our home." "I wasn't sure if you were coming in or not." "Neither was I." "Henry's grandmother is coming to pick him up." "I just..." "Why don't you wait here, and I'll come and get you when she shows up." "No, you have your Psych rotation." "Yeah, but I'm waiting on my supervisor, so I'm gonna be down here for a while." "I'm not sure I can do this." "Kerry, I know this part sucks, but he's gonna end up with you." "You're saying I'm not really sick?" "No, what we're saying is we believe the cause of your illness may be psychological." "I've never had trouble." "I've never been to a shrink." "That's what I told her." " If you continue to have seizures" " I don't wanna go to the Psych Ward." " I'm not crazy." " No one's saying that." "But you'll be safe up there until we can figure this thing out." "And then after that, you can go wherever you need to go to get healthy." "Look, you can go home and risk injuring yourself or your baby or you can come upstairs." "Okay." "I'll be back to take you up." "Perception of a psychiatrist, bedside manner of an ER doc empathetic eyes of an overworked nurse." "I'm the whole package." "All I have to do is actually pass my boards." " Are you Abby?" " Yeah." "I'll be right up." "Are you going to get my grandson for me?" " Yes, I'll tell Dr. Weaver you're here." " No, they asked me to look for you." " I thought Kerry's trying to avoid us." " No, she's expecting you." " Well, then shall we follow you?" " Can you just wait right here?" " Why, is there a problem?" " No." " We're here on time." " She'll be right out." " Is she here?" "Where is Henry?" " I asked you to wait outside." " And I asked, where is she?" " You're going to have to wait outside." "If that baby's not in our custody Weaver will be in breach of a court-ordered agreement." " Jerry, where's Weaver?" " I haven't seen her." "Why are you telling me this?" "If you're doing anything to help her, I'll come back here with an officer." "Shut up." "That's my boy." "That's my boy." "Kerry." "He likes to be held up to the sky." "That's my baby." "What is that?" "It's from the ER." "I was hoping for a puppy." " But I don't see any air holes." " It's big." "And heavy." " No." "It's not." " It's another crib." " Hey, are we having twins?" " You saw the sonogram." "All right." "I gotta get going." " Where?" " I got a board meeting." " I told you." " Yeah, right." "Here, let me." "Oh, my God, John." "We're having a boy." "Yeah." "I think you mentioned that." "What is this?" "What?" "You having a little prenatal jitters?" "Well, you don't think that maybe we...?" " What?" " We rushed into this." "Of course we did." "But we didn't overanalyze it." "We didn't reexamine it." "We didn't overthink it." "We just did it because it felt right." "This is a life that we're responsible for." " You and me." " We're ready." "Are you ready?" "Hey, you wanna come with me, see the house one last time?" " I don't think I need that." " You can see me ruffle a few feathers." " I don't think I need that either." " You could meet my father." "Your father?" "Jordan, Nick, this is Ken Sung." "He's the social worker I told you about." "Another expert." "He's here to talk to you about how things were going at home." " I understand you had a baby recently." " Caroline." "That can be a hard transition." "How have you been getting along?" "I've answered that about 20 times." "We're good." "I'm self-employed right now so I'm home to help with the diapers and everything." "I think he would nurse her if he could." "Any financial stress?" "We hired a nanny, but that's getting a little too expensive." "Our neighbor Frances gives us a hand." "Jordan, are you concerned about your ability to look after Caroline?" "What do you think?" "As long as I'm sick, I can't hold her." "I can't take care of her." " So you do wanna get better?" " What kind of question is that?" "Sometimes patients get sick, and they feel safer or more protected in a hospital environment." "No, no, no." "She wants to get better." "Yeah." "It's all I think about." "You're just another person who thinks I'm faking, aren't you?" "That's what you all think." " It's not true." " Then how come you can't fix it?" "She can be treated as an outpatient, but that's where things get dicey." "If she doesn't get better, I have to file a report." " You're gonna make everything worse." " There's a potential danger to the baby." "What if she has a seizure while carrying it down stairs?" " She's not a child abuser." " My job is to protect the baby." "Is that how you'd approach it if she had epilepsy?" "If she wasn't compliant with the treatment." "Okay." "What if I could get her condition under control before she leaves?" " She stops having seizures?" " Yeah." "Then there's no more danger." "And nothing for me to worry about." "Kem, this is my father." " Hello." " My pleasure." " It's so nice to finally meet you." " Well, yes." "Me too." "Well, we'd better get in there, John." "Here." "Hello, everyone." "This is Makemba Likasu." "She's going to be sitting in." "Makemba." "I apologize." "I don't know all of your names." "And introductions would take all day, so..." "First item on the agenda." "Northwestern has agreed to take over the management of the property for use as an institute of advanced health studies." "You're selling Mother's house?" "Donating it." "It will serve as a conference center for various public health issues and housing for visiting scholars and experts on foundation fellowships." "I don't understand." "Which part?" "This foundation was expressly created by your grandfather to support arts and cultural institutions." "And that's what we've been doing for almost 50 years." "Well, time for a change, then." "You're going to unilaterally overturn the legacy your grandparents left behind?" "I'm not overturning anything." "I'm simply redirecting some resources into other worthy causes." " What gives you the right?" " My grandmother's will gives me the right." "But if you don't believe in what I'm doing here maybe it's time you stepped aside." "Next." "Millicent dies, you run off halfway around the world." "Disappear for months only to come back like some sort of avenging angel..." " ... with a pregnant African girl in tow." " Her name is Kem." "You back using drugs?" "Hey, I made lunch." " Thank you, but I have to be going." " Oh, Dad, stay a while." "Come on." "Thanks." "I can't." "She left the money to me." "She left the house to me." "She trusted me to make the right decisions." "I doubt she'd agree that's what you're doing now." "Pleasure meeting you." "I look forward to getting the wedding announcement." "Are you glad I came?" "It really smoothed out those rough edges, huh?" " Soda machine stole my money." " Sorry, George." "What are you gonna do about it?" "Hello, I'm here to see the Dunns." "I'm their neighbor, Frances Burkett." "Hi." "They're in Jordan's room." "It's right through here on the left." "Can you believe a dollar for a soda and then no soda?" "Do we have to keep having the same conversation, George?" "Kirkland is all set in 2." "Young's getting his IV meds in the Treatment Room." "Do you have a hammer?" " Why don't you watch TV for a while." " I don't wanna watch TV." " In one hour of TV" " Mr. Dunn is in with Jordan?" "Yeah, and the neighbor brought the baby by for a visit." " How's the studying going?" " Microcytic anemias." "Dr. Nelson." " Please, we need some help in here!" " Oh, my God." "Come here." "Oh, no, no, no." "I got you." "I got you." " That's it." "I'm signing her out." " Calm down." "I want you to call different doctors." "I want a neurologist right now." " No!" " Your frustration could be exacerbating the seizure." "Wait in the hall." "It's okay, Jordan." "Jordan, it's okay." " When was her last one?" " Two days ago, also while he was visiting." "Looking for a stressor, maybe he's right over there." "Yeah." "She was fine yesterday when he was here." "So, what's the difference between now and then?" "The baby." "We need to get her talking about her past, her childhood." "Why won't it stop?" "I just want it to stop." "I was doing some patties and started to space out." "Got my feet tangled up and started to slip." "Caught myself by putting my hands on the grill." " At home?" " No, I work at a burger joint." "Dr. Pratt's on the way." "Does he need an IV?" "Just 50 of Benadryl, 6 of I. M. morphine and Thermazine dressings." " If you patch me up I can finish my shift." " I don't think that's gonna happen." " I need that job." " All right, what do we got?" "Elgin Gibbs, 17, burned his hands on a grill." " Elgin, what's popping?" " What's up, doc?" " No bullae or charred areas." " Nothing circumferential." " That good?" " You're golden." "Dr. Pratt." "Whoa." "If your BP were your IQ, you'd be a genius." " Too high?" " Pulse is normal, it can't be from pain." "And you're too young to have high blood pressure, E. So, what's the deal?" "I don't know." "You using something?" "Meth, coke, ephedrine?" "No way." "There's no cops." "I'm just trying to get you fixed up." "I don't do that stuff." "Okay." "We'll be right back." "Add a tox screen." "I bet you it comes back positive." "I've gotta run to the lab." "I shouldn't be more than 20 minutes." " What?" " I've got mouse brain defatting in ethanol that have to be removed in three hours for cresyl violet staining." "We've got a sick kid here." "Those mice are already dead." " Experiments are time-sensitive." " Hey, are you an ER doc or not?" "Last time I checked, but you're not the first one to ask." "Oh, sorry." "Are you off?" "Are you on?" " I've been meaning to call you." " Yeah, me too." " I'll try you tomorrow?" " Yeah." "You should deal with your slides and go home." "I'm working in the ER." "Then get back down there fast." "Yuri, say something." "Three minutes, total silence." "Maybe I need to up the dose." "Talk to me, man." "You're always so nonverbal." "Colin, is he okay?" "He's more than okay." " Where did you get that monitor?" " Dog lab." "Dude, she should leave." " It's okay." "It's all good." " It's not all good." "What's going on?" "It's a supplemental study we're working on." "Ketamine has a lot of potential applications." " Like for getting high." "I've heard of that." " No." "No." "We're psychonauts, astronauts of the mind." "We're explorers." "Ketamine disrupts downstream GABAergic connections gives us access to places we don't normally have access to." "It leads to hallucinations and dysphoria." "We control the dose." "One of us stays sober to record vitals observational data, subjective experiences." "The unconscious is the final frontier." " So it gets under the external inhibitors." " Yep, that's right." "No more ego overlay." "The real you." "The real me?" "Can I trust you?" "Of course you can." "I'm scared." "What if I don't get better, if I can never hold my baby again?" "Jordan, I know this is difficult, but you just have to try very hard." "You have to" "I told you I am trying." "You keep pushing." "I don't know what you want from me." "Well..." "Okay, at some level, we're all the same." "We all have things we hide, things we keep buried." " Like what?" "What do you keep buried?" " This is not about me." "You want me to tell you things, to trust you, but you don't have to say anything?" "Is that fair?" "Don't you trust me?" "Okay." "I can't follow through." "On what?" "On anything." "Once something gets in my way, it's like a chemical reaction." "I just shut down and I give up." "I'm just looking for an excuse to stop because in the end it's easier to do that than to risk being hurt or disappointed again." "You mean with men?" "Men my career, my family." "Pick your poison." "So that's me." "Well, your family must be proud that you're becoming a doctor." "Yeah." "Okay." "Well, that's enough for today." " Well, you don't have to go." " Well, we can talk some more tomorrow." "I" "I had a baby eight years ago." "His name was Charlie." "You have another child?" "I did before I met Nick." "When Charlie was 2 months old, he stopped breathing." "I'm sorry." "The paramedics came and worked on him, and the ER doctors but they couldn't do anything." "He died the same night." "What caused it?" "They said it was SIDS." "Why didn't you mention this before?" " I don't know." " Don't you see the relevance?" "No." "That was just a terrible thing that happened a long time ago." " I love you, Neela." " Yes, I know." " You rock." " Yes, I do." "You're curious, aren't you?" "I can tell." "I prefer to leave the real me buried under my inhibitors for the time being." "You're the coolest med student we've had up here all year." "Tachycardia." "Mild side effect." " It'll resolve soon." " Don't." "188." "He should've normalized by now." "Do you feel all right?" "Heart's pumping a bit, but I'm okay." " P-waves." "Do you see any P-waves?" " P-waves?" "Narrow complex." "Lie down." " Why?" " Get on the floor." "Hey, baby." "Don't skip all the foreplay now." " He's fine." " He's in SVT." " What?" " Supraventricular tachycardia." " Do you have any chest pains, dizziness?" " No." "Any medical conditions?" "WPW, but it's no biggie." "It's just a short circuit through my heart." " You idiot!" " Whoa, whoa, whoa." " You're making a big deal out of nothing." " His BP's 95/60." "No response to carotid sinus massage." "Okay, we're going to the ER." "Bear down." " You were gonna be 20 minutes." " I was." " That was an hour ago." " I know." "Take the bleeder." "We're jammed up and I need to push charts." " We need the monitored bed." " What's with the IV and the monitor?" "It's not working." "I can still feel it." " Somebody tell me what's going on." " In SVT." "Won't break vagal maneuvers." " Need a bed." " We were gonna keep this quiet." " Who is he?" "Who are you?" " It started up in the lab." " History of WPW." " Up in the lab." "Yeah." "We have special projects on the side." "You boys doing experiments on human subjects now?" " It's really starting to hurt." "90/55." "Adenosine?" " What's that do?" " Blocks the AV node." "Can lead to V-fib if there's anterograde conduction." " Six of adenosine going in." " Jam in the flush." "Still SVT." "Go again." "Double the dose." "I got the paddles." " You gonna shock him?" " Hopefully not." "Charge to 50." "Twelve mgs." "Mother of God!" " Did his heart stop?" " Just a glitch in his conduction system." " Normal sinus." "Feel better?" " Yeah." "I think." "Tox screen back on Elgin Gibbs, burned-hand kid in 2." "Okay, thanks." "Get him registered and start a chart." " Exam 4 is open." " He doesn't need a chart or anything." " We'll just get out of your way." " You could revert back to SVT any time." " Neela" " You didn't say anything about registering." "Let me guess." "Whatever you geeks were doing up there was strictly illegal." "No, it's legitimate science." "Word." " Did you just say "word" to me?" " Well, it wasn't exactly authorized." "We're saving lives and you're playing Jekyll and Hyde." " You wanna tell me what it was?" " Just" " We don't wanna get kicked out." "Forget it." "Just hang down here for 20 minutes then get back to wiring electrodes to your nuts for all I care." " Thanks, man." " Sorry about all this." "Hey, what's up, E?" " What's up, doc?" " How you doing?" " About the same." " Well, we got some good news." " Your tox screen came back negative." " I told you it would." "Yeah, you did." "I'm gonna give you something for the pain." "Just take one if you can't sleep." "Otherwise, stick with the Tylenol and leave that dressing alone till you come back for a check." "Dr. Pratt, do you have a minute?" " Maybe in a minute I might." " Hey." " Hello again." " Elgin." " Right." " Why don't you recheck his BP." "You think I could go back to work?" "Not for a few days." "Somebody coming to pick you up?" "Probably my mom, but most likely she'll bring along the kids." " Oh, you got brothers and sisters?" " Four of them." "I'm the oldest." "My mother works graveyard so she can be with the little ones in the day and I work nights to do what I can." " What about your pops?" " Never met him." " So your siblings, their fathers" " You know how it is, two fathers." " Either one of them help out?" " C. C. used to, but he went away and I never met the other guy." "BP's still high, 162/94." "Well, at least you're consistent, E." " Maybe it's just white coat fever." " What's that?" "Fear of doctors." "I even get it myself from time to time." " We'll recheck it when you come back." " All right, doc." "You ever seen hypertension in a kid that age?" "What do you care?" "You've got mice to impregnate." " Have I done something wrong?" " You tell me." "Gallant's in a war zone and you're playing Madame Curie." "I never asked Michael to cover for me, and I feel terrible." "Oh, yeah?" "I think he feels worse." "Look, I don't think it's right for you to hold me responsible." "Look, my friend took a hit and he's gone." "But you're running around doing everything under the sun except ER medicine." "Now, if that's how it's gonna be, then fine." "But hurry up and decide." "You're taking up space." "Pudding and tea." "Yum." "I don't like that tapioca they give us." "Well, I'll put a special request in." "From now on, nothing but chocolate." " I'd like to talk some more about Charlie." " Come on." "I told you what happened." "But you didn't tell me how you felt..." " ... how you reacted to losing him." " How would you react?" "I think I would need to talk to somebody." "Did you get any counseling?" "I didn't need someone to tell me how to cry." "If you can't talk, you won't get past it." "I'm already past it." "Well, the mind is very complicated, and I think yours is playing a trick on you." "That I'm sick because of something that happened eight years ago?" "I think there's a lot more going on in there than you realize." "And there is a medication I can give you that can help us learn more about what you're feeling and thinking." "You mean bourbon?" "It's called Amytal." "It's given intravenously." "It makes you kind of sleepy, but it opens you up." "Once you reach that drowsy state, I'd ask you questions and we'll see if we can learn something we don't already know." "Would you be willing to do that?" "How long has he been in there?" "About half an hour." "Do you have an extra P-20?" "Yuri's this close to his Ph. D., you know." "He's author on a paper coming out in Stroke next month." "Maybe he'll just get reprimanded." " Maybe." " Maybe this'll teach you to cut that out." " Shut up, man." " It's a laboratory, not a playground." "He's an idiot." "He doesn't get it." "The NMDA receptor is the key to understanding the neuropsychiatric filters..." " ...that separate us from our unconscious." " I didn't say anything." " It's cutting-edge stuff." " I don't think anyone downstairs did either." "I like you guys." "I really do." "I like working up here." "It's weird, but in some ways I'm much more comfortable here." "Social Work is talking about placing restrictions on her access to the baby and her insurance coverage runs out." " Sorry." "I can't do it." " Conventional therapy with Jordan could take months." "Sodium amobarbital is a way to jump-start the process try to get to the core issue of her reaction." "I'm glad to see you're prepared for the boards, but this isn't the standard." " It's not a cure." " Like getting a girl when she's plastered." "That's an interesting analogy." "Maybe we could talk about that another time." "Plenty of mothers of SIDS babies don't have a disorder." "Exactly." "There's gotta be something more going on that she can't access." " Which is why we should use the drug." " It's hocus-pocus." "Abby, even if it works, it could destroy the therapeutic bond you've established." " She wants to do it." " Did you tell her it's not safe that there are risks if the dose is not correct?" "She knows, and we'll have an anesthesiologist there." "No." "I'm not signing off." "You have to find another way." "I kind of already did." " Dr. Henriksen approved it." " Henriksen?" "What is he, 80 years old?" "He'd sign off on a lobotomy." "He was also in the Army where he saw Amytal used successfully a number of times in severe cases of combat stress reaction." "Is it better to let them take her kid away?" "Another 25 q. five to 10 minutes." "How are you feeling, Jordan?" "Like I'm floating." "What do you wanna talk about?" "How'd you meet Nick?" "I couldn't find a token for the El and he offered me one if I gave him my number." "So as this gets going, she may say things which will surprise you or upset you." "It won't hurt her, will it?" "We won't let that happen." "Two years." "He's a great guy." "He is." " How about you?" "Ever been married?" " I'm divorced." " Kids?" " No." "And what about you?" "You just have the one, right?" "Yeah, Caroline." "Charlie's gone." "That must've been hard." "The doctors, the paramedics they kept saying it wasn't my fault." "It wasn't my fault." "Jordan, can you tell me about the moment you realized there was something wrong with Charlie?" "Jordan?" "Is she breathing?" "Jordan, you all right?" " Do we have to stop?" " It's okay." "Okay." "I was holding him." "Tell me what happened." "Jake worked all night at the bar and we had a fight that morning." "And he said that I couldn't do anything right that I was a lousy lay." "I couldn't cook." "I couldn't keep the baby quiet." "Did Jake hurt you?" "He hit me." "He hit me a lot." "And what about that morning?" "He was asleep in the bedroom." "And the baby started crying." "And I was scared what Jake would do if he woke up." "So" "Were you trying to keep the baby quiet?" "He kept crying." "I bounced him." "I held him." "I gave him my breast, but he kept crying." "And then Jake" "Jake started yelling and throwing things, and he said he was gonna come out and kill us both." "And so I held Charlie tight." "He was wrapped in a blanket and I held him tight for a long time." "I just kept saying, " Baby, you gotta be quiet now."" "Until he fell asleep." "I thought he was asleep." "I thought he was just sleeping." "It's okay, Jordan." "You were afraid." "But I held him." "I held him too tight." "And you're afraid you're gonna do that again?" "Hey, we 're not in right now but leave a message for Kerry, Sandy or Henry after the beep." "Kerry, it's Elizabeth." "You haven't been in to work and I wanted to run the monthly morbidity stats." "Oh, damn." "Kerry, how are you?" "Look, I know how dreadful it is when someone you love isn't there." "So if there's anything I can do, anything at all please, please call me." "Okay." "Bye." "I hope this is gonna work out, Abby." "I think it will." "What do you mean?" "The seizures are gonna stop." "That's not what I meant." "She's responsible for the death of a child." "I can't just ignore it." "Wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "You" " You said" "If she posed no further potential harm, there'd be nothing to file." "But I can't in good conscience say that right now." "She was a battered woman, Ken." "It's not gonna happen again." "She's a good mother." "I'll monitor the family, I'll keep CPS apprised, and we'll see how it goes." "How's the husband?" "It's a shock to him, but I think he's relieved." "What you did was good medicine." "It might've been better if I just left it alone." "It was a tough situation, but you got to the truth." "That's always good." "Well, too bad the truth is so messed up." "You know, the cafeteria's still open if you're hungry." "I could drill you on developmental milestones, that kind of stuff." "The boards are laced with it." " Too late." " Too late?" " Why?" " Gotta go." "Lockhart, Abby." "Candidate identification number." "Keep it with you at all times during the examination." "You must enter your CID in order to begin." "Once you start a test block, you may not take a break until the block is completed." "Subtitles by SDI Media Group Ripped by subXpacio and TusSeries"