"***** a squid,i think." "since when do squid have wings?" "okay,miss accuracy, it is a bird with tentacles. happy now?" "no,you're right. squid with wings." "can we skip the semantics?" "all that matters is that it's from mongo, it shouldn't be here,and neither should those." "okay,zarkov,hit me,what's the bad news?" "i think these random rifts are like aftershocks from all the previous rifts, and every new rift weakens the dimensional fabric even more." "okay,so that's the bad news?" "yes. but the real bad news is that eventually the whole thing's going to burst, destroying all space,time,and dimension." "that's it,i'm done recycling." "so,is there any good news in there?" "somewhere?" "the good news is,the old bad news, which was ming, isn't as bad as the new bad news, which is that we're all going to die." "this is exactly what rankol and i predicted would happen." "okay,i'm sorry,did i miss something?" "when did we start trusting rankol?" "i know,i know,your relationship with rankol was different than mine." "no,no,no,no. ham and baloney are different. i got tortured." "if random objects from mongo are appearing on earth, wouldn't objects from earth pop up on mongo?" "well?" "if it's not a weapon,what is it?" "i believe it's a musical instrument of some kind." "as for the others... no doubt an acquired taste on earth." "but these objects pose no threat." "who sent them?" "someone on earth must have developed a rift generator." "i'm afraid the situation is far worse." "the very fabric between our worlds is becoming unstable." "hence,these spontaneous rifts." "if they're not stabilized by the time the aqueduct is complete, our entire plan for earth's water will fail." "so the tunneling project is proceeding on course?" "yes,and on schedule." "when the water comes,we will be ready." "but without a dependable rift... you solve this,rankol, and you will be the savior of our world." "but fail... well... oh,i would hate to think." "ah,it is a diglish." "diglish?" "on mongo,the turin keep them as pets." "so it's not dangerous?" "only during mating season,of course." "mating season?" "i would not fall asleep,if i were you." "this is bad!" "a whole cluster of rifts at the kozy korner motel." "isn't that near where we found the squid thing?" "diglish. that would make sense." "if these random rifts are the result of damage from all the previous rifts, then this motel must be the point of intersection... like ripples colliding on a pond." "only instead of dying out, the ripples become more frequent." "and it keeps opening up in the same place." "exactly. whoa... the motel is like rift central." "well,i know where we're going." "now... don't you go anywhere." "i like you just the way you are." "in a minute, you're going to like me even better." "hope so." "±¾×öä"½ö¹©ñ§ï°½"á÷£¬ñï½ûóãóúéìòµóãí¾" " =ææàãðü×öä"×é=- ê±¼äöá£ºð¡èý" "seems quiet enough." "what are we supposed to be looking for?" "uh,beats me. things from mongo usually have a way of standing out,though." "i stand out?" "oh,no. not at all. you fit right in." "but that doesn't." "this look familiar to anyone?" "of course. it is a verden walking staff." "not exactly a fashion statement on this planet." "i will survey the perimeters." "it's only a boot." "well,the maid service sucks." "either that, or something really big came through here." "like a tornado." "well,whatever it was,it's gone now." "isn't it?" "stay here." "be careful." "what is it?" "oh,we're good. all clear." "well,the only scary thing so far in this room is this... cowboy shirt." "uh,actually... this,uh... 38d... that's a good color for you." "my." "yeah,you know what?" "i think,uh... we've got the serious makings of a party here." "one of your guests reported hearing screams coming from room 12." "so what's your point?" "i mean,some of our parties can get pretty crazy." "we're talking about private parties here?" "we prefer the term "discreet clientele. "" "uh-huh." "my point is,if i were to go running every time i hear a strange sound... well,you get my drift." "so you didn't check to see if anyone was hurt?" "do i look like homeland security to you?" "okay,sir,i'll check out the room." "hopefully those screams you heard will just turn out to be cries of passion." "so." "this is the big story you had to cover." "joe!" "this is why you couldn't see me today,or last week." "why you've been lying to me all this time... you and him. in a dump like this." "it's not what you think." "really,really,really not what you think." "just how stupid do you think i am?" "look,there's a perfectly good explanation for all of this,joe." "so explain it." "i can't." "i'm really sorry,joe,but i can't." "that's what i thought." " joe-- - joe,please,you got to trust me." "what you touching me for,buddy,huh?" " today is not the day!" " look out!" "what the hell just happened?" "that... would be a rift." "and we just fell through it." "where are we?" "this... this is,uh... this is the planet mongo." "another planet?" "no way." "way." "this... is... insane." "it's a little crazy,but you'll get used to it." "what?" "you just told me that we're not on earth anymore." "it might take me a little while to get used to it." "yeah,okay,you know what?" "you're right. i'm sorry,i forgot how weird it was for dale and i the first time we got here." "dale?" "you brought dale here?" "no. not exactly." "it was an accident." "i'm listening!" "okay,well, there was a rift like that one, and i was going to go through it to try and find my dad, and dale tried to stop me, only it didn't quite work out like that." "this is insanity!" "you don't know what's over there, if you can come back." "dale,i have to do this." "i don't care." "hey." "hey!" "you see,joe,that's it." "there's no affair,okay?" "this is it,this is the whole secret." "it's mongo." "the biggest secret in history!" "and you kept it from me?" "look,we couldn't tell you,all right?" "the more people that know, the more dangerous it was for everyone!" "well,then you should have kept it away from dale!" "well,i tried,all right?" "but this is dale were talking about!" "i mean,once she gets her mind set on something... what was i going to do?" "we're talking about my fiancee." "i would have protected her." "dale doesn't need protection,all right?" "she's a lot stronger than you may think." "dale!" "what happened to you?" "i had a ming makeover." "i was supposed to be tonight's entertainment." "fortunately,i found a stand-in." "i was just coming to rescue you." "no,no,i was coming to rescue you." "are you kidding me?" "you not only put her life in danger,she almost got-- yeah,but she didn't!" "all right?" "all right?" "she escaped,so... we're all good." "okay." "i guess you deserve one free punch. now,can we move on?" "okay,you know what?" "now,that's one punch too many." "keep counting." "all right,now,can we just... calm down?" "hey!" "no,no,no,no,no,no!" "no!" "through a rift?" "both of them?" "how could this happen?" "but,more importantly,how do they get back?" "they don't have a rift blaster." "you don't need one with these ripples. they open on their own, so maybe joe and flash can catch another one back." "provided they stay alive that long." "if they're in the right place at the right time." "i feel like this is my fault." "but who knew those two would fight over me?" "i did." "me too." "really?" "you saw this coming?" "from,like,a mile away." "all right. so what now?" "now,i get to work." "joe" "what the heck?" "that's like hitting a brick wall!" "ah!" "bullet-proof vest. standard issue." "okay,that is so not playing fair." "give up?" "oh,god,i'm too tired to give up." "why don't we consider... quitting?" "suits me fine,pal,'cause i'm through with you." "oh,no,you can't do that,all right?" "this isn't maryland,this is mongo." "you can't just go walking off." "who didn't see that coming?" "more volunteers for the tunnels." "this has been a good day's hunting." "next time you want to go running off, try checking with me first." "maybe next time you'll tell me what's out there." "we're in big trouble here, in case you didn't get that part." "yeah?" "with who?" "who's the law around here?" "i'm the only law here." "remember that,if you want to stay alive." "strange weapon. won't need this where you're going." "up you get. take them to the tunnels." "told you,check with me first." "something from mongo was definitely here." "and it looks like it went that way." "monster!" "monster!" "are you okay?" "no!" "would you be okay if you saw a monster?" "what kind of monster?" "big monster!" "did you see where it went?" "no!" "and you know what?" "i don't want to know." "you go catch it. that's what you're good at." "you're good at that." "i've got enough dimensional frequency readings to work on the rift problem." "that's what i'm good at." "so,uh... you just go ahead." "i'm going to go back to the lab." "if there's anything you need,i'll be back there... not catching anything!" "this is bad." "what,there really is a monster?" "worse." "a deviate." "can't believe the government lets this happen." "the government makes it happen." "number-one rule on mongo-- avoid anyone in a uniform." "rule number two?" "don't break rule number one." "they can't all be bad." "what about asking to see the head guy?" "okay,that would be ming, and that'd be a seriously bad idea, trust me." "coming from the guy who couldn't trust me?" "believe me, you want to avoid being on a first-name basis with any of the local authorities." "i learned that one the hard way." "where is the imex?" "what's an imex?" "oh,well. i did try." "what did you do to provoke him?" "nothing. i just had something he wanted." "come on,there had to be more than that." "it takes a very special talent to run into homicidal aliens." "yeah,well,you should know." "you're saying aliens have come to earth?" "hi. i'm lillian." "that's not possible." "yeah,but neither is mongo, and here we are,right?" "remember the blackout?" "the time that you couldn't account for?" "right after i met lillian." "ding,ding,ding,ding,ding." "wait,you're saying she was an alien?" "ask dale. she was there with you. she saw it all." "joe?" "oh,my god." "joe!" "hey." "everything's okay,babe." "if it wasn't for us, you'd be the world's oldest detective." "i almost get zeroed out by an alien vampire, and dale didn't tell me?" "what am i supposed to say?" "a how bout thank you?" "after all,if it wasn't for dale... she came through for both of us." "wait. dale saved you too?" "ming forced me to duel. i was drugged, but she y to turn it around." "talk to barin. tell him what's going on." "i'm going to try to get to flash." "flash." "i just came to wish you luck." "she had a clever way of getting me the antidote to save my life." "you know,dale and that mouth of hers, she has a way of getting through to people." "if it wasn't for her,i'd be dead." "at could still happen." "chain them to the other volunteers." "who do we have to talk to to get out of here?" "there's only one way out. want to take it?" "no,no,no. he's fine. he's new in town. he didn't get the memo." "oth of you." "or you'll wish i killed you right here." "i can speak for myself." "yeah,clearly. no need to thank me." "hey,dactyl. what happened to him?" "the black dust." "everyone who mines the black rocks i will. you will too." "wait and see." "t's like halloween." "where do all these people come from?" "all over mongo. ming's what you'd call an equal-opportunity dictator." "that's a verden. usually friendly." "omadrian. usually not." "are you friends with all the tribes on this planet?" "i don't think "friends" is exactly the right word." "bring the tools of transformation!" "i thought you didn't allow men here." "these have been transformed." "transformed?" "their aggressions have been removed." "see how peaceful they are?" "oh,no,no,no. you're not turning me into one of those,all right?" "i- i need my aggressions. i'm very,very fond of my aggressions!" "look,i just came here for some medicine!" "my friend,he was bitten by a joy-bug." "so,luckily,i was able to avoid a close encounter of the painful kind." "what are these tunnels for?" "they say ming has found new source-water, but no one has seen it." "then why so many workers?" "those in the black tunnels die fast." "here it takes a little longer." "this just keeps getting better." "what'd you get us into,flash?" "flash?" "you're flash gordon?" "yeah." "this guy knows you?" "i spent some time with the dactyls." "they're a tribe of flying men." "i am darem." "i have heard the stories of how you helped our leader,vultan,find his son." "the kid whose friends said he was kidnapped by bird men." "you're telling me that was real?" "you listen to me!" "i am vultan of the dactyls, and you are my son, and i tell you now,you can do this!" "you have strength that others can only dream of." "okay." "we jump together!" "now!" "you see,joe,you already met a dactyl." "he just hadn't learned to fly yet." "you're here to work,not tell stories." "stay well,darem, so i can have the pleasure of killing you myself." "okay,easy. easy." "what the hell did you do that for?" "all dactyls owe a debt of honor to flash gordon." "besides... angering strake is the last pleasure i have left." "thank you,darem." "you must have done something right." "not everyone around here hates you." "thanks." "i think." "you'll clear 20 loads of rock by moonrise... or be sent to dig out the black tunnels." "whoa,whoa. hey." "easy there,big guy,all right?" "you just need to catch your breath." "no,he's right." "i can't make 20 loads." "strake has won." "grant me a favor,flash gordon?" "anything. name it." "when i die, take my crest." "sow the feathers on the wind, so that my brothers will know that i'm gone." "of course." "but nobody's going to die here today." "he's right." "we'll fill your quota." "the deviates were people once, but that was before they drank the gray water." "gray water?" "it's toxic. clear to the eye,but unhealthful." "then why would they drink it?" "no one knew until the mutations appeared." "then every generation was worse than the last." "they became animals, deformed in body and mind." "but now that people know... i see you have never been thirsty... truly thirsty." "your throat turns to clay." "you crave water more than air itself." "so they drink the gray water,knowing... knowing they will live and their children will live." "it is a sacrifice they choose." "but flash and i,we met a deviate on mongo." "he didn't hurt us." "well,you were lucky." "i have seen them tear a man in half." "this is hans zarkov... recording my attempt to save the world for future generations." "the rifts have entered a new and volatile state." "each rift is now generating more rifts at an exponential rate." "if we extrapolate the pattern frequency, and the process is not stopped, then the likely outcome... total collapse of the interdimensional fabric." "it will be like chernobyl on a cosmic scale." "great... i'm sharing the fate of the universe with a piece of flying sushi." "wait!" "believe me... death is the only cure for this curse." " it's afraid of us." " it should be." "but it's not attacking." "that's ice!" "it just wants the water." " wait!" " what now?" "it's a her!" "and i think she's pregnant." "don't do this. save yourselves." "i'm going to die anyway." "not a chance." "as long as we're breathing, you're breathing." "you are brave... but very foolish." "just once, i wish someone would leave out the "foolish" part." "hey,joe,i've got an idea." "something that'll get us out of here?" "possibly,but i got to admit, it's a little dangerous for both of us." "everything you do is dangerous for both of us." "if it doesn't work out, do your best to try and get out of here." "go back to where we came through." "zarkov says the rifts happen in the same place." "it's your only chance of getting home." "and leave you behind?" "if it comes to that." "don't worry,though. i'll be long dead by then." "take off your shirt." "that's right." "okay... there's more where those came from... strange. it does not attack us." "hey. hey,hey." "chocolate brings women together." "hey!" "strake!" "get over here!" "you got a problem?" "yeah. and i'm looking right at it." " get back to work." " hey,you know what?" "union break." "you don't like it,talk to the teamsters." "whatever tribe you're with,they'll never see you again." "piece of cake!" "walk in the park." "aw,is that all you've got?" "i'm getting bored here!" "how'd you know the flak jacket would work?" "had no idea. i just kind of went for it." "you really are nuts." "it's a crazy planet." "i'm just doing my part." "here's your gun. let's get these cuffs off." "here. come here." "here. here's the key." "everyone get out!" "all right,time to break up ming's little tunnel party." "i will tell my brothers of the bravery of flash gordon." "you risked your lives for us." "we will not forget." "neither will we." "take care of yourself,darem." "all right,let's find some daylight." "race you to the rift." "tick,tick,tick,ma'am. every hour goes by, i'm losing rent on that room." "the detective wanted me to tell you he still needs it." "he's collecting fingerprints." "well... what do you need the towels and linen for?" "collecting evidence." "evidence of what?" "i am not at liberty to discuss details of this investigation." "but you're a reporter." "i wouldn't do that if i were you." "the next thing you know,there's a news crew down here." "your sleazy little motel?" "all over the 6:00 news." "a little bad for business,don't you think?" "my plan is simple." "daring,if i do say so myself, but simple." "the rifts resonate at a specific sub-atomic frequency, so if i can access that using the proton gun and invert the amplitude, i think... i hope... that i can create a cancellation wave that will stop the rift ripples." "maybe." "ugh... if i am successful... the fabric of the universe will be restored." "of course,if i fail, and if that happens,well,i'm..." "really sorry." "are you sure about this?" "zarkov said the ripples had a point of origin, like the motel on earth-- he called it rift central." "which means?" "which means where we came through is mongo rift central." "that's where we need to be for our best chance at a ride home." "well,if there's a rift." "are you saying we have to wait for this thing?" "that's the way it works, if we can find it." "that's it?" "that's our master plan?" "unless you can think of a better one." "there's no way we can make our own rift?" "yeah,well,there is,but i'd advise against it." "zarkov and baylin already tried that and barely made it." "it's working!" "i did it!" "where's flash?" "we can't just leave him behind!" "we are outnumbered and my ip is empty. are you ready?" "no!" "good." "now!" "out of all the people you've met on mongo, there has to be someone who'd help us." "well,possibly." "well,at this point,i'd take "possibly."" "you got to take my word for it, she's more trouble than she's worth." "hello,aura. that ion pistol really brings out the color of your eyes." "if you're looking at my eyes,i'm insulted." "hey,hey,hey!" "don't think so." "i'd rather take my chances out here." "what is it with you and the women on this planet?" "what can i say?" "it's a gift." "you seem to know what you are doing." "never underestimate the educational value of cable television." "i've seen a hundred tv births." "plus,i covered a triplet birth in a taxi once." "i have deep misgivings." "breathe!" "okay... you need to keep breathing." "okay... and push!" "and push!" "okay,we are definitely getting close now." "more than close." "we're here." "so... now what?" "our ride home." "what the heck?" "didn't i just fry that guy?" "okay,okay,you caught us. we surrender." "i don't care." "oh,no." "breathe!" "push!" "push!" "who are you?" "witches!" "i beg your pardon?" "what omadrian magic have you worked?" "we are not omadrian." "where is this place?" "where are flash and joe?" "two men, strangers on mongo." "the volunteers?" "drop it,or this one dies." "do you have any idea how strong an angry deviate can be?" "what?" "oh,my god." "how efficient." "i think she just saved your life." "uh,wait... you're saying that's it?" "the rift's closed?" "we missed the bus back to earth?" "yeah,welcome to my life." "and wait till i tell you the bad news... that guy's in the motel?" "with dale?" " and baylin." " who?" "i'll tell you about it later." "right now,we get to wait for the next bus home." "joe,there's something i got to tell you, about dale and me... there is no dale and me. there never was." "you telling me this 'cause i have a gun now?" "no,i'm telling you this because whatever happened on mongo, dale never gave up on you." "don't give up on her." "breathe!" "i think i have the solution to all-- ohh!" "is that a dead body?" "is that a monster?" "a deviate." "oh,of course. i-i-is it doing what i think it's doing?" "birthing. would you like to help?" "oh!" "no,no,no,i-i-i'm fine right here." "honestly,just... just forget you ever saw me." "good. push!" "you're almost there!" "uh,hey,guys. uh,guys?" "hate to interrupt, but since the entire universe is in imminent danger of implosion,well... will that thing open up the rift ripples so that flash and joe can come back?" "actually,no." "if i fire it here at the cluster locus,it'll close them." "but before it does, it should open up a whole lot of rifts, briefly... then she can get back to where she belongs." "how briefly?" "a few seconds?" "if they're close to the locus on mongo, flash and joe can return." "and if they're not?" "i know... but if i don't do this now,none of it will matter. so... where were the last rift ripples?" "by the ugly guy." "stay back!" "come on. hurry!" "urry!" "hurry!" "it's okay." "go through. go." "his turn." "he weighs a ton!" "oh!" "the diglish." "ha!" "there's that rift!" "it's our ticket home!" "that's what you said last time." "what about flash and joe?" "i guess they did not make it." " you're here!" " you could say that." "and we're here. it worked!" "what worked?" "i saved the universe!" "temporarily." "we birthed a deviate infant." "it's been a full day all around." "so... so now i know." "everything." "and?" "and we've got a lot to talk about." "you are soiled." "where were you all this time?" "giving joe a crash course on mongo... which i'm going to explain to you later." "right now,i'm craving something earth-based, like hot dogs and mustard and a double-header baseball game." "i never played baseball." "what are hot dogs?" "you know what?" "nobody really knows."