"[ SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS ]" "[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]" "WEAREGOINGTOCONNECTYOUR EXISTING DATABASE TO YOUR ACCOUNTING SYSTEM, USING WHAT'S" "EXISTING DATABASE TO YOUR ACCOUNTING SYSTEM, USING WHAT'S KNOWN AS A JOINT..." "ACCOUNTING SYSTEM, USING WHAT'S KNOWN AS A JOINT..." "NOW..." "KNOWN AS A JOINT..." "NOW..." "[ AUDIENCE CHEERS, APPLAUDS ]" "NOW..." "[ AUDIENCE CHEERS, APPLAUDS ] JASON HERE IS ONE OF OUR TOP" "[ AUDIENCE CHEERS, APPLAUDS ] JASON HERE IS ONE OF OUR TOP SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS." "JASON HERE IS ONE OF OUR TOP SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS." "JASON, TELL THEM HOW THIS IS" "SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS." "JASON, TELL THEM HOW THIS IS GOING TO WORK." "JASON, TELL THEM HOW THIS IS GOING TO WORK." "JASON?" "!" "GOING TO WORK." "JASON?" "!" "[GASPS]" "JASON?" "!" "[GASPS] OH!" "[GASPS] OH!" "OH!" "SORRY." "OH!" "OH!" "SORRY." "SORRY." "OH!" "SORRY." "SORRY." "OH!" "SORRY." "OH!" "I'MSORRY." "OH!" "I'MSORRY." "WELL..." "ISAIDWE 'DSAVEYOU" "I'MSORRY." "WELL..." "ISAIDWE 'DSAVEYOU  MONEY, AND JASON'S ALREADY" "WELL..." "ISAIDWE 'DSAVEYOU  MONEY, AND JASON'S ALREADY THROWING IT AT YOU." "MONEY, AND JASON'S ALREADY THROWING IT AT YOU." "[ CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY ]" "YOU KNOW, JASON, I WAS HESITANT TO HIRE YOU AT FIRST, BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO BE A" "TO HIRE YOU AT FIRST, BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO BE A MAGICIAN." "YOU SAID YOU WANTED TO BE A MAGICIAN." "BUT, AS THE YEARS WENT ON, I" "MAGICIAN." "BUT, AS THE YEARS WENT ON, I COULD SEE THAT WAS GOING" "BUT, AS THE YEARS WENT ON, I COULD SEE THAT WAS GOING NOWHERE." "COULD SEE THAT WAS GOING NOWHERE." "AND I WAS PLEASED." "NOWHERE." "AND I WAS PLEASED." "I-I'MREALLYSORRYABOUT" "AND I WAS PLEASED." "I-I'MREALLYSORRYABOUT BEFORE." "I-I'MREALLYSORRYABOUT BEFORE." "I'MNOT." "BEFORE." "I'MNOT." "IT SHOWS ME THAT YOU DON'T WANT" "I'MNOT." "IT SHOWS ME THAT YOU DON'T WANT THIS AS A CAREER." "IT SHOWS ME THAT YOU DON'T WANT THIS AS A CAREER." "YES,I DO!" "THIS AS A CAREER." "YES,I DO!" "I LOVE DATABASES." "YES,I DO!" "I LOVE DATABASES." "[LAUGHS]" "I LOVE DATABASES." "[LAUGHS] DATABASES ARE BORING, BUT I LOVE" "[LAUGHS] DATABASES ARE BORING, BUT I LOVE THEM." "DATABASES ARE BORING, BUT I LOVE THEM." "THAT'S MY LIFE." "THEM." "THAT'S MY LIFE." "YOUR LIFE IS MAGIC." "THAT'S MY LIFE." "YOUR LIFE IS MAGIC." "AND THIS JOB IS " " IT'S STANDING" "YOUR LIFE IS MAGIC." "AND THIS JOB IS " " IT'S STANDING IN YOUR WAY." "AND THIS JOB IS " " IT'S STANDING IN YOUR WAY." "YOU'RE" "YOU'REFIRINGME?" "IN YOUR WAY." "YOU'RE" "YOU'REFIRINGME?" "DON'TLOOKAT IT THATWAY ." "YOU'RE" "YOU'REFIRINGME?" "DON'TLOOKAT IT THATWAY ." "IT'S A "FIRE-TUNITY."" "DON'TLOOKAT IT THATWAY ." "IT'S A "FIRE-TUNITY." YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO SUCCEED" "IT'S A "FIRE-TUNITY." YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO SUCCEED UNLESS YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT." "YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO SUCCEED UNLESS YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT." "[SIGHS]" "UNLESS YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT." "[SIGHS] IT'S NOT THAT EASY." "[SIGHS] IT'S NOT THAT EASY." "POOF!" "YOU'REGONE." "IT'S NOT THAT EASY." "POOF!" "YOU'REGONE." "HEY, I JUST DID A MAGIC TRICK." "POOF!" "YOU'REGONE." "HEY, I JUST DID A MAGIC TRICK." "[ LAUGHS ]" "HEY, I JUST DID A MAGIC TRICK." "[ LAUGHS ] [SIGHS]" "[ LAUGHS ] [SIGHS] UH..." "THATONE!" "[SIGHS] UH..." "THATONE!" "YES!" "UH..." "THATONE!" "YES!" "[ Laughing ] I WON!" "YES!" "[ Laughing ] I WON!" "HEY,BUDDY,YOUWANTTOMAKE" "[ Laughing ] I WON!" "HEY,BUDDY,YOUWANTTOMAKE SOME MONEY?" "HEY,BUDDY,YOUWANTTOMAKE SOME MONEY?" "SORRY,NOT" " NOTINTERESTED." "SOME MONEY?" "SORRY,NOT" " NOTINTERESTED." "COMEON!" "IT 'SEASY." "SORRY,NOT" " NOTINTERESTED." "COMEON!" "IT 'SEASY." "JUST FOLLOW THE PEA." "COMEON!" "IT 'SEASY." "JUST FOLLOW THE PEA." "COME ON OVER." "JUST FOLLOW THE PEA." "COME ON OVER." "IWANTTO PLAYAGAIN." "COME ON OVER." "IWANTTO PLAYAGAIN." "COOL." "IWANTTO PLAYAGAIN." "COOL." "ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO." "COOL." "ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO." "N-NO,NO,DON'TPLAY." "ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO." "N-NO,NO,DON'TPLAY." "IT'S A SCAM." "N-NO,NO,DON'TPLAY." "IT'S A SCAM." "AS LONG AS HE LIFTS THE SHELL," "IT'S A SCAM." "AS LONG AS HE LIFTS THE SHELL, IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO WIN." "AS LONG AS HE LIFTS THE SHELL, IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO WIN." "HEY,HEY,HEY,HEY ." "IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO WIN." "HEY,HEY,HEY,HEY ." "DO I MESS WITH YOUR BUSINESS?" "HEY,HEY,HEY,HEY ." "DO I MESS WITH YOUR BUSINESS?" "NO,I DIDN'TMEAN" "DO I MESS WITH YOUR BUSINESS?" "NO,I DIDN'TMEAN-- SHH!" "NO,I DIDN'TMEAN-- SHH!" "DO I MESS WITH YOUR BUSINESS?" "SHH!" "DO I MESS WITH YOUR BUSINESS?" "THEN, DON'T MESS WITH MINE." "DO I MESS WITH YOUR BUSINESS?" "THEN, DON'T MESS WITH MINE." "IF YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO PLAY," "THEN, DON'T MESS WITH MINE." "IF YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO PLAY, BEAT IT." "IF YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO PLAY, BEAT IT." "BUT LET THE WOMAN PLAY." "BEAT IT." "BUT LET THE WOMAN PLAY." "LOOK." "I 'MSORRY." "BUT LET THE WOMAN PLAY." "LOOK." "I 'MSORRY." "WAIT." "WAIT!" "LOOK." "I 'MSORRY." "WAIT." "WAIT!" "YOU PLAY FOR FUN, NO MONEY." "WAIT." "WAIT!" "YOU PLAY FOR FUN, NO MONEY." "TAKE YOUR MONEY, LADY." "YOU PLAY FOR FUN, NO MONEY." "TAKE YOUR MONEY, LADY." "HERE." "TAKE YOUR MONEY, LADY." "HERE." "ALL RIGHT?" "HERE." "ALL RIGHT?" "CHECK THIS OUT." "CHECK THIS OUT." "WE GOT THE PEA." "WE GOT THE PEA." "NO PEA, NOTHING HERE." "NO PEA, NOTHING HERE." "NICE AND SIMPLE." "NICE AND SIMPLE." "STRAIGHT LINE, TO THE RIGHT, TO" "STRAIGHT LINE, TO THE RIGHT, TO THE LEFT, BACK INTO A NICE" "THE LEFT, BACK INTO A NICE DIAGONAL." "DIAGONAL." "WHICH ONE IS IT UNDER?" "WHICH ONE IS IT UNDER?" "COME ON." "WHICH ONE IS IT UNDER?" "COME ON." "WHICH ONE IS IT UNDER?" "ALLRIGHT!" "WHICH ONE IS IT UNDER?" "ALLRIGHT!" "LOOKATYOU." "ALLRIGHT!" "LOOKATYOU." "JUST MADE 20 BUCKS." "LOOKATYOU." "JUST MADE 20 BUCKS." "CAN'T BELIEVE IT." "JUST MADE 20 BUCKS." "CAN'T BELIEVE IT." "HERE." "TAKE THE MONEY." "CAN'T BELIEVE IT." "HERE." "TAKE THE MONEY." "DOUBLE OR NOTHING." "HERE." "TAKE THE MONEY." "DOUBLE OR NOTHING." "IF YOU TELL ME WHICH SHELL IT'S" "DOUBLE OR NOTHING." "IF YOU TELL ME WHICH SHELL IT'S UNDER..." "IT'S YOURS." "IF YOU TELL ME WHICH SHELL IT'S UNDER..." "IT'S YOURS." "YOULETME LIFTTHE SHELL?" "UNDER..." "IT'S YOURS." "YOULETME LIFTTHE SHELL?" "SURE." "YOULETME LIFTTHE SHELL?" "SURE." "YOU LIFT THE SHELL." "SURE." "YOU LIFT THE SHELL." "BUT FIRST, YOU GOT PUT IN A $20" "YOU LIFT THE SHELL." "BUT FIRST, YOU GOT PUT IN A $20 TO MATCH IT." "BUT FIRST, YOU GOT PUT IN A $20 TO MATCH IT." "IPUTIN A$ 20,BUT IFI GET" "TO MATCH IT." "IPUTIN A$ 20,BUT IFI GET IT RIGHT, I GET BOTH BILLS." "IPUTIN A$ 20,BUT IFI GET IT RIGHT, I GET BOTH BILLS." "IT'STHATSIMPLE." "IT RIGHT, I GET BOTH BILLS." "IT'STHATSIMPLE." "GOOD STUFF." "IT'STHATSIMPLE." "GOOD STUFF." "VERY NICE." "GOOD STUFF." "VERY NICE." "WE HAVE $40." "VERY NICE." "WE HAVE $40." "ALL RIGHT, JUST FOLLOW THE PEA," "WE HAVE $40." "ALL RIGHT, JUST FOLLOW THE PEA, NICE AND SIMPLE." "ALL RIGHT, JUST FOLLOW THE PEA, NICE AND SIMPLE." "THE LITTLE GUY." "NICE AND SIMPLE." "THE LITTLE GUY." "HERE'S THE PEA." "THE LITTLE GUY." "HERE'S THE PEA." "NO PEA." "NO PEA." "PAY CLOSE ATTENTION." "PAY CLOSE ATTENTION." "STRAIGHT LINE, TO THE RIGHT, TO" "STRAIGHT LINE, TO THE RIGHT, TO THE LEFT, INTO A NICE DIAGONAL." "THE LEFT, INTO A NICE DIAGONAL." "WHICH ONE IS IT UNDER?" "YOU CHEATED." "ISAWYOUDOTHEMOVE." "I KNOW HOW IT WORKS." "ISAWYOUDOTHEMOVE." "I KNOW HOW IT WORKS." "YOUCHEATED!" "I KNOW HOW IT WORKS." "YOUCHEATED!" "NO,I KNOWMAGIC." "YOUCHEATED!" "NO,I KNOWMAGIC." "HEY!" "NO,I KNOWMAGIC." "HEY!" "YOU JUST STOLE MY MONEY!" "HEY!" "YOU JUST STOLE MY MONEY!" "NOPE." "WEBOTHDID ." "[ SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS ]" "STEVE,I GOTTO TELLYOU WHAT HAPPENED YESTERDAY." "HEY,BUDDY,I'MONTHEPHONE ." "HAPPENED YESTERDAY." "HEY,BUDDY,I'MONTHEPHONE ." "NOW LISTEN." "HEY,BUDDY,I'MONTHEPHONE ." "NOW LISTEN." "I DON'T WALK OUT THE DOOR FOR" "NOW LISTEN." "I DON'T WALK OUT THE DOOR FOR LESS THAN 400 BUCKS." "I DON'T WALK OUT THE DOOR FOR LESS THAN 400 BUCKS." "YOU'LL HAVE TO FIND SOMEBODY" "LESS THAN 400 BUCKS." "YOU'LL HAVE TO FIND SOMEBODY ELSE." "YOU'LL HAVE TO FIND SOMEBODY ELSE." "WHATISIT ?" "I'LLDOIT." "ELSE." "WHATISIT ?" "I'LLDOIT." "HANGON." "WHATISIT ?" "I'LLDOIT." "HANGON." "IT'S A MAGIC-O-GRAM." "HANGON." "IT'S A MAGIC-O-GRAM." "AWHAT?" "IT'S A MAGIC-O-GRAM." "AWHAT?" "TRUSTME." "YOUDON 'TWANTIT." "AWHAT?" "TRUSTME." "YOUDON 'TWANTIT." "YES,I DO." "ILOSTMYJOB." "TRUSTME." "YOUDON 'TWANTIT." "YES,I DO." "ILOSTMYJOB." "REALLY?" "YES,I DO." "ILOSTMYJOB." "REALLY?" "YEAH." "REALLY?" "YEAH." "GREATNEWS!" "YEAH." "GREATNEWS!" "I'VE GOT SOMEONE TO REPLACE ME." "GREATNEWS!" "I'VE GOT SOMEONE TO REPLACE ME." "HE'S A TERRIFIC MAGICIAN, AND" "I'VE GOT SOMEONE TO REPLACE ME." "HE'S A TERRIFIC MAGICIAN, AND HE'LL WORK CHEAP." "HE'S A TERRIFIC MAGICIAN, AND HE'LL WORK CHEAP." "How much?" "HE'LL WORK CHEAP." "How much?" "AHUNDREDBUCKS?" "How much?" "AHUNDREDBUCKS?" "$150." "AHUNDREDBUCKS?" "$150." "PLUS, $50 EXTRA FOR THE" "$150." "PLUS, $50 EXTRA FOR THE BALLOONS." "PLUS, $50 EXTRA FOR THE BALLOONS." "GREAT!" "BALLOONS." "GREAT!" "HE'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW." "GREAT!" "HE'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW." "TERRIFIC." "THANKS." "HE'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW." "TERRIFIC." "THANKS." "WEAR A TUX." "TERRIFIC." "THANKS." "WEAR A TUX." "ATUX?" "WEAR A TUX." "ATUX?" "WHY DOES EVERY MAGICIAN THINK" "ATUX?" "WHY DOES EVERY MAGICIAN THINK THEY HAVE TO WEAR A TUX?" "WHY DOES EVERY MAGICIAN THINK THEY HAVE TO WEAR A TUX?" "SOTHEYDON'TTHINKYOU'RE" "THEY HAVE TO WEAR A TUX?" "SOTHEYDON'TTHINKYOU'RE THE PLUMBER, ALTHOUGH THAT COULD" "SOTHEYDON'TTHINKYOU'RE THE PLUMBER, ALTHOUGH THAT COULD GET YOU LAID." "THE PLUMBER, ALTHOUGH THAT COULD GET YOU LAID." "[ BELL JINGLES ]" "GET YOU LAID." "[ BELL JINGLES ] [ DOOR CLOSES ]" "[ BELL JINGLES ] [ DOOR CLOSES ] HELLO,MYBROTHERS!" "[ DOOR CLOSES ] HELLO,MYBROTHERS!" "I HAVE RUBBER CHICKENS FOR SALE." "HELLO,MYBROTHERS!" "I HAVE RUBBER CHICKENS FOR SALE." "[ ALL LAUGH ]" "I HAVE RUBBER CHICKENS FOR SALE." "[ ALL LAUGH ] JACK,JASONHEREHAS JUST" "[ ALL LAUGH ] JACK,JASONHEREHAS JUST JOINED OUR RANKS OF PROFESSIONAL" "JACK,JASONHEREHAS JUST JOINED OUR RANKS OF PROFESSIONAL MAGICIANS." "JOINED OUR RANKS OF PROFESSIONAL MAGICIANS." "QUITTHEDAYJOB ,HUH ?" "MAGICIANS." "QUITTHEDAYJOB ,HUH ?" "PRETTYMUCH." "QUITTHEDAYJOB ,HUH ?" "PRETTYMUCH." "CONGRATULATIONS." "PRETTYMUCH." "CONGRATULATIONS." "I HEREBY APPOINT YOU AS THE" "CONGRATULATIONS." "I HEREBY APPOINT YOU AS THE NEWEST MEMBER TO THE" "I HEREBY APPOINT YOU AS THE NEWEST MEMBER TO THE THIRD-MOST-MOCKED PROFESSION," "NEWEST MEMBER TO THE THIRD-MOST-MOCKED PROFESSION, RIGHT BEHIND VENTRILOQUISTS AND" "THIRD-MOST-MOCKED PROFESSION, RIGHT BEHIND VENTRILOQUISTS AND MIMES." "RIGHT BEHIND VENTRILOQUISTS AND MIMES." "[Laughing]THANKS." "MIMES." "[Laughing]THANKS." "HEY, I'M GONNA NEED A PACKAGE OF" "[Laughing]THANKS." "HEY, I'M GONNA NEED A PACKAGE OF PAPER HAT TEARS." "HEY, I'M GONNA NEED A PACKAGE OF PAPER HAT TEARS." "SURE.$ 14.95." "PAPER HAT TEARS." "SURE.$ 14.95." "IACTUALLYLOSTMYWALLET." "SURE.$ 14.95." "IACTUALLYLOSTMYWALLET." "IT'S A LONG STORY." "IACTUALLYLOSTMYWALLET." "IT'S A LONG STORY." "DUDE, DO YOU MIND " " CAN YOU" "IT'S A LONG STORY." "DUDE, DO YOU MIND " " CAN YOU SPOT ME?" "DUDE, DO YOU MIND " " CAN YOU SPOT ME?" "YOUWANTME TO BUYYOURHAT" "SPOT ME?" "YOUWANTME TO BUYYOURHAT TEARS?" "YOUWANTME TO BUYYOURHAT TEARS?" "JUSTTHISONCE." "TEARS?" "JUSTTHISONCE." "I'M WAITING ON MY CREDIT CARD." "JUSTTHISONCE." "I'M WAITING ON MY CREDIT CARD." "[ CELLPHONE RINGS ]" "THATWASDONTARZIA." "WHO?" "OH,COMEON ." "WHO?" "OH,COMEON ." "YOU GOT TO KNOW THESE PEOPLE IF" "OH,COMEON ." "YOU GOT TO KNOW THESE PEOPLE IF YOU'RE GONNA GET ANYWHERE." "YOU GOT TO KNOW THESE PEOPLE IF YOU'RE GONNA GET ANYWHERE." "FROM THE SAN DIEGO CONVENTION." "YOU'RE GONNA GET ANYWHERE." "FROM THE SAN DIEGO CONVENTION." "I JUST GOT BOOKED FOR NEXT WEEK." "FROM THE SAN DIEGO CONVENTION." "I JUST GOT BOOKED FOR NEXT WEEK." "COOL." "I JUST GOT BOOKED FOR NEXT WEEK." "COOL." "MAYBEI 'LLTAKEDENISE." "COOL." "MAYBEI 'LLTAKEDENISE." "WHO'SDENISE?" "MAYBEI 'LLTAKEDENISE." "WHO'SDENISE?" "OH,SHE'STHISGIRLI'M" "WHO'SDENISE?" "OH,SHE'STHISGIRLI'M SEEING." "OH,SHE'STHISGIRLI'M SEEING." "SHE IS FANTASTIC." "SEEING." "SHE IS FANTASTIC." "SHE HAD HER HANDS ALL OVER ME AT" "SHE IS FANTASTIC." "SHE HAD HER HANDS ALL OVER ME AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "SHE HAD HER HANDS ALL OVER ME AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "I TOOK HER IN THE séance ROOM." "THE MAGIC PALACE." "I TOOK HER IN THE séance ROOM." "I HAD HER PICK A CARD." "I TOOK HER IN THE séance ROOM." "I HAD HER PICK A CARD." "AND THEN I PRODUCED IT..." "I HAD HER PICK A CARD." "AND THEN I PRODUCED IT..." "RIGHT OUT OF HER MAGIC BOX." "AND THEN I PRODUCED IT..." "RIGHT OUT OF HER MAGIC BOX." "OH-HO-HO!" "RIGHT OUT OF HER MAGIC BOX." "OH-HO-HO!" "YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TEACH ME" "OH-HO-HO!" "YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TEACH ME THAT ONE!" "YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO TEACH ME THAT ONE!" "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?" "THAT ONE!" "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?" "YOU SHOULD GO TO SAN DIEGO." "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?" "YOU SHOULD GO TO SAN DIEGO." "THE CONTEST IS HUGE." "YOU SHOULD GO TO SAN DIEGO." "THE CONTEST IS HUGE." "YOU SHOULD ENTER THAT." "THE CONTEST IS HUGE." "YOU SHOULD ENTER THAT." "AH..." "YOU SHOULD ENTER THAT." "AH..." "SERIOUSLY,MAN." "AH..." "SERIOUSLY,MAN." "THAT CONTEST HAS LAUNCHED MANY" "SERIOUSLY,MAN." "THAT CONTEST HAS LAUNCHED MANY CAREERS." "THAT CONTEST HAS LAUNCHED MANY CAREERS." "IT LAUNCHED MINE." "CAREERS." "IT LAUNCHED MINE." "LAUNCHED ME RIGHT OUT OF MY" "IT LAUNCHED MINE." "LAUNCHED ME RIGHT OUT OF MY EX-WIFE'S HOUSE, RIGHT INTO MY" "LAUNCHED ME RIGHT OUT OF MY EX-WIFE'S HOUSE, RIGHT INTO MY NEXT WIFE'S BOSOM." "EX-WIFE'S HOUSE, RIGHT INTO MY NEXT WIFE'S BOSOM." "[ LAUGHS ]" "NEXT WIFE'S BOSOM." "[ LAUGHS ] THATCONTESTIS LESSTHANA" "[ LAUGHS ] THATCONTESTIS LESSTHANA WEEK AWAY." "THATCONTESTIS LESSTHANA WEEK AWAY." "I DON'T HAVE AN ACT." "WEEK AWAY." "I DON'T HAVE AN ACT." "OH,COMEON ." "I DON'T HAVE AN ACT." "OH,COMEON ." "YOU GOT ALL SORTS OF GOOD STUFF." "OH,COMEON ." "YOU GOT ALL SORTS OF GOOD STUFF." "ICAN'TJUSTDOTHE" "YOU GOT ALL SORTS OF GOOD STUFF." "ICAN'TJUSTDOTHE CUT-AND-RESTORED ROPE WITH THE" "ICAN'TJUSTDOTHE CUT-AND-RESTORED ROPE WITH THE LINKING RINGS." "CUT-AND-RESTORED ROPE WITH THE LINKING RINGS." "I WANT MY MAGIC TO BE ABOUT" "LINKING RINGS." "I WANT MY MAGIC TO BE ABOUT PEOPLE AND RELATIONSHIPS, NOT" "I WANT MY MAGIC TO BE ABOUT PEOPLE AND RELATIONSHIPS, NOT ABOUT PROPS." "PEOPLE AND RELATIONSHIPS, NOT ABOUT PROPS." "HEY, WHY DON'T WE DO AN ACT" "ABOUT PROPS." "HEY, WHY DON'T WE DO AN ACT TOGETHER?" "HEY, WHY DON'T WE DO AN ACT TOGETHER?" "OH,NO,IDON 'TENTER" "TOGETHER?" "OH,NO,IDON 'TENTER CONTESTS ANYMORE." "OH,NO,IDON 'TENTER CONTESTS ANYMORE." "THEY'RE PAYING ME TO BE THERE." "CONTESTS ANYMORE." "THEY'RE PAYING ME TO BE THERE." "CHECKTHISOUT." "THEY'RE PAYING ME TO BE THERE." "CHECKTHISOUT." "THIS JUST CAME IN." "CHECKTHISOUT." "THIS JUST CAME IN." "I REALLY THINK YOU'RE GONNA LIKE" "THIS JUST CAME IN." "I REALLY THINK YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT." "NOW GIVE ME YOUR HAND." "MM-HMM." "NOW!" "MM-HMM." "NOW!" "OH,GOSH!" "UGH!" "NOW!" "OH,GOSH!" "UGH!" "[LAUGHS]" "OH,GOSH!" "UGH!" "[LAUGHS] WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?" "[LAUGHS] WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?" "THIS KILLS AT KIDS' PARTIES!" "WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?" "THIS KILLS AT KIDS' PARTIES!" "NO,THANKS." "THIS KILLS AT KIDS' PARTIES!" "NO,THANKS." "I AM A VEGGIE MAGICIAN." "NO,THANKS." "I AM A VEGGIE MAGICIAN." "FUNNY." "I AM A VEGGIE MAGICIAN." "FUNNY." "YOU JUST COME UP WITH THAT?" "FUNNY." "YOU JUST COME UP WITH THAT?" "YEAH." "YOU JUST COME UP WITH THAT?" "YEAH." "YEAH,DON'TPUTTHATINTHE" "YEAH." "YEAH,DON'TPUTTHATINTHE ACT." "YEAH,DON'TPUTTHATINTHE ACT." "[ CIRCUS-TYPE MUSIC PLAYS ]" "[ CELLPHONE RINGS ] HELLO?" "ISTHISJASONKANT?" "HELLO?" "ISTHISJASONKANT?" "YES!" "ISTHISJASONKANT?" "YES!" "ISTHISTHEJASONKANT WHO" "YES!" "ISTHISTHEJASONKANT WHO WON FIRST PLACE IN THE" "ISTHISTHEJASONKANT WHO WON FIRST PLACE IN THE MAGIC CAMP CONTEST 15 YEARS" "WON FIRST PLACE IN THE MAGIC CAMP CONTEST 15 YEARS AGO?" "MAGIC CAMP CONTEST 15 YEARS AGO?" "YEAH,THAT" " THAT'SME." "AGO?" "YEAH,THAT" " THAT'SME." "WHO IS THIS?" "YEAH,THAT" " THAT'SME." "WHO IS THIS?" "[Laughs]" "WHO IS THIS?" "[Laughs] Oh, my God!" "You were so good." "[Laughs] Oh, my God!" "You were so good." "I competed against you." "Oh, my God!" "You were so good." "I competed against you." "I did the act with flowers." "I competed against you." "I did the act with flowers." "Stacy Dietz." "I did the act with flowers." "Stacy Dietz." "OH,YEAH." "Stacy Dietz." "OH,YEAH." "I-I THINK I REMEMBER THAT." "OH,YEAH." "I-I THINK I REMEMBER THAT." "No,youdon't." "I-I THINK I REMEMBER THAT." "No,youdon't." "I DID A MIND-READING ACT." "No,youdon't." "I DID A MIND-READING ACT." "I WOULD NEVER DO A FLOWER ACT." "I DID A MIND-READING ACT." "I WOULD NEVER DO A FLOWER ACT." "OKAY,LISTEN." "IGOT TOGO." "I WOULD NEVER DO A FLOWER ACT." "OKAY,LISTEN." "IGOT TOGO." "I'm" "I 'mnewin town,and I" "OKAY,LISTEN." "IGOT TOGO." "I'm" "I 'mnewin town,and I don't know any magicians." "I'm" "I 'mnewin town,and I don't know any magicians." "I thought we could...get don't know any magicians." "I thought we could...get together and talk magic." "I thought we could...get together and talk magic." "OKAY,YEAH." "together and talk magic." "OKAY,YEAH." "THAT ACTUALLY WOULD BE GOOD" "OKAY,YEAH." "THAT ACTUALLY WOULD BE GOOD BECAUSE I'M WORKING ON A NEW" "THAT ACTUALLY WOULD BE GOOD BECAUSE I'M WORKING ON A NEW ACT." "BECAUSE I'M WORKING ON A NEW ACT." "Howaboutdinnertonight?" "ACT." "Howaboutdinnertonight?" "Um,okay." "Howaboutdinnertonight?" "Um,okay." "THERE'S A GREAT ITALIAN PLACE." "Um,okay." "THERE'S A GREAT ITALIAN PLACE." "IT'S IN ENCINO." "THERE'S A GREAT ITALIAN PLACE." "IT'S IN ENCINO." "CaféCarolina?" "IT'S IN ENCINO." "CaféCarolina?" "YEAH." "CaféCarolina?" "YEAH." "I THOUGHT YOU JUST MOVED HERE." "YEAH." "I THOUGHT YOU JUST MOVED HERE." "Yes,butremember." "I THOUGHT YOU JUST MOVED HERE." "Yes,butremember." "I read minds." "Yes,butremember." "I read minds." "8:00." "I read minds." "8:00." "I'LL BE THE ONE YOU WANT TO HAVE 8:00." "I'LL BE THE ONE YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH." "I'LL BE THE ONE YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH." "UM..." "OKAY!" "SEX WITH." "UM..." "OKAY!" "WELL, SEE YOU TONIGHT." "WHOISIT ?" "I'MHERETO DO AMAGIC-O-GRAM FOR PAUL'S BIRTHDAY." "I'MHERETO DO AMAGIC-O-GRAM FOR PAUL'S BIRTHDAY." "PAUL'SMYDAD." "FOR PAUL'S BIRTHDAY." "PAUL'SMYDAD." "HE'S NOT HERE." "PAUL'SMYDAD." "HE'S NOT HERE." "DO A TRICK." "HE'S NOT HERE." "DO A TRICK." "YOU'RELATE!" "DO A TRICK." "YOU'RELATE!" "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AT" "YOU'RELATE!" "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AT 2:00." "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE AT 2:00." "I'MSORRY." "2:00." "I'MSORRY." "IT'S, LIKE, 2:04." "I'MSORRY." "IT'S, LIKE, 2:04." "HE ALREADY LEFT?" "IT'S, LIKE, 2:04." "HE ALREADY LEFT?" "IHADTO RUINTHE SURPRISETO" "HE ALREADY LEFT?" "IHADTO RUINTHE SURPRISETO GET HIM TO STAY." "IHADTO RUINTHE SURPRISETO GET HIM TO STAY." "HE KNEW STEVE KRAMER FROM TV," "GET HIM TO STAY." "HE KNEW STEVE KRAMER FROM TV, BUT HE HAD NEVER HEARD OF YOU." "HE KNEW STEVE KRAMER FROM TV, BUT HE HAD NEVER HEARD OF YOU." "SO, HE LEFT." "BUT HE HAD NEVER HEARD OF YOU." "SO, HE LEFT." "YOU ANY GOOD?" "SO, HE LEFT." "YOU ANY GOOD?" "WELL,YEAH." "YOU ANY GOOD?" "WELL,YEAH." "I MEAN, I ACTUALLY GOT FIRST" "WELL,YEAH." "I MEAN, I ACTUALLY GOT FIRST PLACE AT MAGIC CAMP." "I MEAN, I ACTUALLY GOT FIRST PLACE AT MAGIC CAMP." "STEVE ONLY GOT FOURTH." "PLACE AT MAGIC CAMP." "STEVE ONLY GOT FOURTH." "THERE'SA MAGICCAMP." "STEVE ONLY GOT FOURTH." "THERE'SA MAGICCAMP." "Loser!" "THERE'SA MAGICCAMP." "Loser!" "SKIP,PUTTHATDOWNANDWATCH" "Loser!" "SKIP,PUTTHATDOWNANDWATCH  THE MAGICIAN." "SKIP,PUTTHATDOWNANDWATCH  THE MAGICIAN." "[ BABY CRYING ]" "THE MAGICIAN." "[ BABY CRYING ] AND JUST THEM ANYWHERE." "[ BABY CRYING ] AND JUST THEM ANYWHERE." "Shh!" "AND JUST THEM ANYWHERE." "Shh!" "YOULIKEMAGIC?" "Shh!" "YOULIKEMAGIC?" "HERE, YOU TAKE THE YELLOW PAPER," "YOULIKEMAGIC?" "HERE, YOU TAKE THE YELLOW PAPER, AND I'LL TAKE THE BLACK." "HERE, YOU TAKE THE YELLOW PAPER, AND I'LL TAKE THE BLACK." "HERE, TAKE THE PAPER." "AND I'LL TAKE THE BLACK." "HERE, TAKE THE PAPER." "TAKE THE PAPER." "HERE, TAKE THE PAPER." "TAKE THE PAPER." "NOW TEAR THE PAPER UP INTO TINY," "TAKE THE PAPER." "NOW TEAR THE PAPER UP INTO TINY, LITTLE PIECES." "NOW TEAR THE PAPER UP INTO TINY, LITTLE PIECES." "TEAR IT UP." "LITTLE PIECES." "TEAR IT UP." "ZACHISSLEEPING." "TEAR IT UP." "ZACHISSLEEPING." "AWESOME!" "ZACHISSLEEPING." "AWESOME!" "[ CRYING RESUMES ]" "AWESOME!" "[ CRYING RESUMES ] HERE." "I 'LLJUSTDO IT ." "[ CRYING RESUMES ] HERE." "I 'LLJUSTDO IT ." "TEAR THE PAPER UP INTO TINY," "HERE." "I 'LLJUSTDO IT ." "TEAR THE PAPER UP INTO TINY, LITTLE PIECES, LIKE I'D ASKED" "TEAR THE PAPER UP INTO TINY, LITTLE PIECES, LIKE I'D ASKED YOU TO." "LITTLE PIECES, LIKE I'D ASKED YOU TO." "I THINK WE CAN DO SOMETHING" "YOU TO." "I THINK WE CAN DO SOMETHING REALLY INTERESTING HERE." "I THINK WE CAN DO SOMETHING REALLY INTERESTING HERE." "IT TURNS INTO..." "REALLY INTERESTING HERE." "IT TURNS INTO..." "A HAT!" "IT TURNS INTO..." "A HAT!" "WHICH YOU CAN KEEP." "A HAT!" "WHICH YOU CAN KEEP." "YOUSUCK." "WHICH YOU CAN KEEP." "YOUSUCK." "[SIGHS]" "YOUSUCK." "[SIGHS] OKAY." "[SIGHS] OKAY." "WELL, THIS ONE I KNOW YOU'LL" "OKAY." "WELL, THIS ONE I KNOW YOU'LL LIKE." "WELL, THIS ONE I KNOW YOU'LL LIKE." "IF YOU SEE A BLACK CARD, SAY," "LIKE." "IF YOU SEE A BLACK CARD, SAY, "SMOKE," AND IF YOU SEE A RED" "IF YOU SEE A BLACK CARD, SAY, "SMOKE," AND IF YOU SEE A RED CARD, SAY, "FIRE."" ""SMOKE," AND IF YOU SEE A RED CARD, SAY, "FIRE." SMOKE." "CARD, SAY, "FIRE." SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "SMOKE." "FIRE." "SMOKE." "FIRE." "FIRE!" "FIRE." "FIRE!" "AWESOME!" "FIRE!" "AWESOME!" "I'M GONNA SHOW ZACH!" "AWESOME!" "I'M GONNA SHOW ZACH!" "IREALLYDON'TAPPRECIATEYOU" "I'M GONNA SHOW ZACH!" "IREALLYDON'TAPPRECIATEYOU SHOOTING CARDS AT MY SON'S FACE." "IREALLYDON'TAPPRECIATEYOU SHOOTING CARDS AT MY SON'S FACE." "IT'SJUSTAJOKE." "SHOOTING CARDS AT MY SON'S FACE." "IT'SJUSTAJOKE." "HE SEEMED TO ENJOY IT." "IT'SJUSTAJOKE." "HE SEEMED TO ENJOY IT." "DON'TCASHTHISUNTIL" "HE SEEMED TO ENJOY IT." "DON'TCASHTHISUNTIL TOMORROW, OR IT'LL BOUNCE." "DON'TCASHTHISUNTIL TOMORROW, OR IT'LL BOUNCE." "DO I HAVE TO TIP YOU, TOO?" "TOMORROW, OR IT'LL BOUNCE." "DO I HAVE TO TIP YOU, TOO?" "WELL,IT'SCUSTOMARY." "DO I HAVE TO TIP YOU, TOO?" "WELL,IT'SCUSTOMARY." "[ SIGHS ]" "WELL,IT'SCUSTOMARY." "[ SIGHS ] WELL,HERE." "[ SIGHS ] WELL,HERE." "HERE'S A ROLL OF NICKELS." "WELL,HERE." "HERE'S A ROLL OF NICKELS." "HEY,ZACH?" "FIRE!" "HERE'S A ROLL OF NICKELS." "HEY,ZACH?" "FIRE!" "[ ZACH CRYING ]" "DOYOUREMEMBERTHISGIRL  FROM MAGIC CAMP?" "WEHADGIRLSATMAGICCAMP?" "FROM MAGIC CAMP?" "WEHADGIRLSATMAGICCAMP?" "YEAH,DOWNSTAIRS." "WEHADGIRLSATMAGICCAMP?" "YEAH,DOWNSTAIRS." "ANYWAY, THIS GIRL, SHE CALLED" "YEAH,DOWNSTAIRS." "ANYWAY, THIS GIRL, SHE CALLED OUT OF THE BLUE." "ANYWAY, THIS GIRL, SHE CALLED OUT OF THE BLUE." "DIDSHESAYIHADSEXWITH" "OUT OF THE BLUE." "DIDSHESAYIHADSEXWITH HER?" "DIDSHESAYIHADSEXWITH HER?" "No!" "HER?" "No!" "'CAUSEI DON'TREMEMBERHER ." "No!" "'CAUSEI DON'TREMEMBERHER ." "NO,SHECALLEDME." "'CAUSEI DON'TREMEMBERHER ." "NO,SHECALLEDME." "We're having dinner tonight." "NO,SHECALLEDME." "We're having dinner tonight." "SHECALLEDABOUTYOU ." "We're having dinner tonight." "SHECALLEDABOUTYOU ." "THAT'S GREAT." "SHECALLEDABOUTYOU ." "THAT'S GREAT." "IS IT A DATE?" "THAT'S GREAT." "IS IT A DATE?" "I'MNOTREALLYSURE." "IS IT A DATE?" "I'MNOTREALLYSURE." "I DON'T THINK SO." "I'MNOTREALLYSURE." "I DON'T THINK SO." "I THINK WE'RE JUST TALKING" "I DON'T THINK SO." "I THINK WE'RE JUST TALKING MAGIC." "I THINK WE'RE JUST TALKING MAGIC." "HEY, WHY DON'T YOU AND DENISE" "MAGIC." "HEY, WHY DON'T YOU AND DENISE COME JOIN US?" "HEY, WHY DON'T YOU AND DENISE COME JOIN US?" "YEAH,ITDIDN'TREALLYWORK" "COME JOIN US?" "YEAH,ITDIDN'TREALLYWORK  OUT." "YEAH,ITDIDN'TREALLYWORK  OUT." "I DID MEET THIS NEW GIRL " "OUT." "I DID MEET THIS NEW GIRL -- CINDY AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "I DID MEET THIS NEW GIRL -- CINDY AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "SHE SAW MY CLOSE-UP ACT." "CINDY AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "SHE SAW MY CLOSE-UP ACT." "I BOUGHT HER A DRINK AND TOOK" "SHE SAW MY CLOSE-UP ACT." "I BOUGHT HER A DRINK AND TOOK HER IN THE séance ROOM." "I BOUGHT HER A DRINK AND TOOK HER IN THE séance ROOM." "IT WASN'T JUST THE SPIRITS THAT" "HER IN THE séance ROOM." "IT WASN'T JUST THE SPIRITS THAT MADE THE TABLE MOVE." "IT WASN'T JUST THE SPIRITS THAT MADE THE TABLE MOVE." "Great." "MADE THE TABLE MOVE." "Great." "Well, anyway, her name is" "Great." "Well, anyway, her name is Stacy Dietz." "Well, anyway, her name is Stacy Dietz." "We're going to " "Stacy Dietz." "We're going to -- HOLDON." "We're going to -- HOLDON." "DID YOU SAY STACY DIETZ?" "HOLDON." "DID YOU SAY STACY DIETZ?" "YEAH." "YOUKNOWHER ?" "DID YOU SAY STACY DIETZ?" "YEAH." "YOUKNOWHER ?" "Notpersonally,butIused to" "YEAH." "YOUKNOWHER ?" "Notpersonally,butIused to hear her name all the time." "Notpersonally,butIused to hear her name all the time." "Whatdidyouhear?" "hear her name all the time." "Whatdidyouhear?" "NOTMUCH." "Whatdidyouhear?" "NOTMUCH." "SHE USED TO WORK A LOT " "NOTMUCH." "SHE USED TO WORK A LOT -- ATLANTIC CITY, VEGAS." "SHE USED TO WORK A LOT -- ATLANTIC CITY, VEGAS." "THEN, SHE JUST VANISHED." "ATLANTIC CITY, VEGAS." "THEN, SHE JUST VANISHED." "I FIGURED SHE JUST WENT OFF TO" "THEN, SHE JUST VANISHED." "I FIGURED SHE JUST WENT OFF TO MAKE BABIES." "[ DOOR CREAKS ] THAT'SVERYCRISPY..." "STACY?" "YOU." "IBROUGHTBACKYOURWALLET." "YOU." "IBROUGHTBACKYOURWALLET." "THECASHIS GONE." "IBROUGHTBACKYOURWALLET." "THECASHIS GONE." "YEAH,WELL,WHYDOYOUTHINK" "THECASHIS GONE." "YEAH,WELL,WHYDOYOUTHINK  I TOOK YOUR WALLET?" "YEAH,WELL,WHYDOYOUTHINK  I TOOK YOUR WALLET?" "AND, BESIDES, YOU WERE GONNA BUY" "I TOOK YOUR WALLET?" "AND, BESIDES, YOU WERE GONNA BUY ME DINNER, ANYWAY, RIGHT?" "AND, BESIDES, YOU WERE GONNA BUY ME DINNER, ANYWAY, RIGHT?" "SO, WE CAN JUST THINK OF THIS AS" "ME DINNER, ANYWAY, RIGHT?" "SO, WE CAN JUST THINK OF THIS AS OUR SECOND DATE." "SO, WE CAN JUST THINK OF THIS AS OUR SECOND DATE." "OURSECONDDATE?" "OUR SECOND DATE." "OURSECONDDATE?" "ANDI WILL,TOO." "OURSECONDDATE?" "ANDI WILL,TOO." "AREYOUAPROSTITUTE?" "ANDI WILL,TOO." "AREYOUAPROSTITUTE?" "NO." "AREYOUANASSHOLE?" "AREYOUAPROSTITUTE?" "NO." "AREYOUANASSHOLE?" "WELL,YOUPICKEDMYPOCKET." "NO." "AREYOUANASSHOLE?" "WELL,YOUPICKEDMYPOCKET." "YOU KEEP OFFERING ME SEX." "WELL,YOUPICKEDMYPOCKET." "YOU KEEP OFFERING ME SEX." "IDIDN'TOFFERYOU SEX ." "YOU KEEP OFFERING ME SEX." "IDIDN'TOFFERYOU SEX ." ""I'LLBETHEONE YOU WANTTO" "IDIDN'TOFFERYOU SEX ." ""I'LLBETHEONE YOU WANTTO HAVE SEX WITH."" ""I'LLBETHEONE YOU WANTTO HAVE SEX WITH." "THINK OF THIS AS OUR SECOND" "HAVE SEX WITH." "THINK OF THIS AS OUR SECOND DATE."" ""THINK OF THIS AS OUR SECOND DATE." WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "DATE." WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "IWASJUSTBEINGFRIENDLY." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "IWASJUSTBEINGFRIENDLY." "OH." "IWASJUSTBEINGFRIENDLY." "OH." "[LAUGHS]" "DID YOU REALLY GO TO MAGIC CAMP, OR WAS THAT A LIE, TOO?" "OKAY." "OR WAS THAT A LIE, TOO?" "OKAY." "NOW YOU'RE JUST BEING RUDE." "OKAY." "NOW YOU'RE JUST BEING RUDE." "I'M GONNA HAVE TO STEAL YOUR" "NOW YOU'RE JUST BEING RUDE." "I'M GONNA HAVE TO STEAL YOUR WALLET AGAIN." "I'M GONNA HAVE TO STEAL YOUR WALLET AGAIN." "THAT'SNOTMY WALLET." "WALLET AGAIN." "THAT'SNOTMY WALLET." "IT'STHISGUY'SOVERHERE ." "THAT'SNOTMY WALLET." "IT'STHISGUY'SOVERHERE ." "[ CLEARS THROAT ]" "IT'STHISGUY'SOVERHERE ." "[ CLEARS THROAT ] E-EXCUSE ME?" "[ CLEARS THROAT ] E-EXCUSE ME?" "SORRY, SIR?" "E-EXCUSE ME?" "SORRY, SIR?" "YEAH." "SORRY, SIR?" "YEAH." "ITHINKYOUDROPPEDYOUR" "YEAH." "ITHINKYOUDROPPEDYOUR  WALLET." "ITHINKYOUDROPPEDYOUR  WALLET." "OH,THANKS." "WALLET." "OH,THANKS." "YOU'REWELCOME." "I'MSORRY." "WE DON'T TAKE CHECKS." "DO YOU HAVE A CREDIT CARD?" "WE DON'T TAKE CHECKS." "DO YOU HAVE A CREDIT CARD?" "IDIDHAVECREDITCARDS." "DO YOU HAVE A CREDIT CARD?" "IDIDHAVECREDITCARDS." "I HAD TO CANCEL THEM." "IDIDHAVECREDITCARDS." "I HAD TO CANCEL THEM." "YEAH,I KNOW." "I HAD TO CANCEL THEM." "YEAH,I KNOW." "IT WAS VERY EMBARRASSING." "YEAH,I KNOW." "IT WAS VERY EMBARRASSING." "CANYOUGIVEUSA MINUTE?" "IT WAS VERY EMBARRASSING." "CANYOUGIVEUSA MINUTE?" "[ SIGHS ]" "CANYOUGIVEUSA MINUTE?" "[ SIGHS ] [ LAUGHS ]" "[ SIGHS ] [ LAUGHS ] DO YOU HAVE ANY MONEY ON YOU AT" "[ LAUGHS ] DO YOU HAVE ANY MONEY ON YOU AT ALL?" "DO YOU HAVE ANY MONEY ON YOU AT ALL?" "YOUWANTME TO PAYFOR OUR" "ALL?" "YOUWANTME TO PAYFOR OUR  FIRST DATE?" "YOUWANTME TO PAYFOR OUR  FIRST DATE?" "SECONDDATE." "REMEMBER?" "FIRST DATE?" "SECONDDATE." "REMEMBER?" "THAT'SRIGHT." "SECONDDATE." "REMEMBER?" "THAT'SRIGHT." "DOYOUWORKATALL, LIKE ,A" "THAT'SRIGHT." "DOYOUWORKATALL, LIKE ,A REAL JOB, OR DO YOU JUST SWINDLE" "DOYOUWORKATALL, LIKE ,A REAL JOB, OR DO YOU JUST SWINDLE PEOPLE TO GET BY?" "REAL JOB, OR DO YOU JUST SWINDLE PEOPLE TO GET BY?" "IFSOMEONEIS STUPIDENOUGH" "PEOPLE TO GET BY?" "IFSOMEONEIS STUPIDENOUGH TO PLAY THE 3-SHELL GAME, THEY" "IFSOMEONEIS STUPIDENOUGH TO PLAY THE 3-SHELL GAME, THEY DESERVE TO LOSE THEIR MONEY." "TO PLAY THE 3-SHELL GAME, THEY DESERVE TO LOSE THEIR MONEY." "THIS IS NOT GONNA BE ENOUGH." "DESERVE TO LOSE THEIR MONEY." "THIS IS NOT GONNA BE ENOUGH." "VERYNICE." "THIS IS NOT GONNA BE ENOUGH." "VERYNICE." "[ LAUGHS ]" "VERYNICE." "[ LAUGHS ] AH!" "WAITAMINUTE!" "[ LAUGHS ] AH!" "WAITAMINUTE!" "WE NEED A TIP." "AH!" "WAITAMINUTE!" "WE NEED A TIP." "I MEAN, SHE WAS A PRETTY GOOD" "WE NEED A TIP." "I MEAN, SHE WAS A PRETTY GOOD WAITRESS, RIGHT?" "[LAUGHS] NICE." "THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TRICK" "NICE." "THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TRICK QUARTERS." "THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TRICK QUARTERS." "IDON'TTHINKSO." "QUARTERS." "IDON'TTHINKSO." "SUREITIS ,'CAUSEITCAN" "IDON'TTHINKSO." "SUREITIS ,'CAUSEITCAN PASS RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE." "SUREITIS ,'CAUSEITCAN PASS RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE." "[LAUGHS]" "PASS RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE." "[LAUGHS] VERY NICE." "[LAUGHS] VERY NICE." "HERE,THISTIMEI'LLCOVER" "VERY NICE." "HERE,THISTIMEI'LLCOVER IT." "HERE,THISTIMEI'LLCOVER IT." "GIVE ME YOUR HAND." "HERE." "PRESS." "NOW LET'S SEE IF IT WORKED." "PRESS." "NOW LET'S SEE IF IT WORKED." "OH!" "IT'S GOT TO BE HEADS." "NOW LET'S SEE IF IT WORKED." "OH!" "IT'S GOT TO BE HEADS." "HERE." "PRESS." "OH!" "IT'S GOT TO BE HEADS." "HERE." "PRESS." "NOW!" "HERE." "PRESS." "NOW!" "YOU PUSHED TOO HARD!" "NOW!" "YOU PUSHED TOO HARD!" "WENT RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE." "YOU PUSHED TOO HARD!" "WENT RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE." "SEE?" "WENT RIGHT THROUGH THE TABLE." "SEE?" "[LAUGHS]" "SEE?" "[LAUGHS] OKAY." "WATCH MY RING." "[LAUGHS] OKAY." "WATCH MY RING." "VERY JUMPY." "OKAY." "WATCH MY RING." "VERY JUMPY." "READY?" "VERY JUMPY." "READY?" "GONNA JUMP, JUMP BACK." "READY?" "GONNA JUMP, JUMP BACK." "JUMP, JUMP BACK." "GONNA JUMP, JUMP BACK." "JUMP, JUMP BACK." "HMM." "JUMP, JUMP BACK." "HMM." "LET'S SEE." "HMM." "LET'S SEE." "JUST PUT A LITTLE SALT ON THERE." "LET'S SEE." "JUST PUT A LITTLE SALT ON THERE." "AND WHOA." "JUST PUT A LITTLE SALT ON THERE." "AND WHOA." "[LAUGHS]" "AND WHOA." "[LAUGHS] NICELY DONE." "WHERE IS IT?" "[LAUGHS] NICELY DONE." "WHERE IS IT?" "HMM." "MM-HMM." "YEAH." "NICELY DONE." "WHERE IS IT?" "HMM." "MM-HMM." "YEAH." "YEAH." "CHECK THE SALT SHAKER." "[ BOTH LAUGH ] CANYOUPLEASENOT DOTHAT TO THE SALT?" "CANYOUPLEASENOT DOTHAT TO THE SALT?" "THATGOOD?" "THE SALT?" "THATGOOD?" "[ BOTH LAUGH ]" "THATGOOD?" "[ BOTH LAUGH ] HAVEYOUDONEESCAPESBEFORE?" "[ BOTH LAUGH ] HAVEYOUDONEESCAPESBEFORE?" "OH,SURE." "HAVEYOUDONEESCAPESBEFORE?" "OH,SURE." "HANDCUFFS, STRAITJACKETS, EVEN" "OH,SURE." "HANDCUFFS, STRAITJACKETS, EVEN ONE REALLY BAD RELATIONSHIP." "HANDCUFFS, STRAITJACKETS, EVEN ONE REALLY BAD RELATIONSHIP." "REALLY?" "ONE REALLY BAD RELATIONSHIP." "REALLY?" "JUSTANEVILMAGICIAN." "REALLY?" "JUSTANEVILMAGICIAN." "HMM." "I 'VEHEARDOF THOSE." "JUSTANEVILMAGICIAN." "HMM." "I 'VEHEARDOF THOSE." "[LAUGHS]" "HMM." "I 'VEHEARDOF THOSE." "[LAUGHS] OKAY." "[LAUGHS] OKAY." "NOW ESCAPE." "OKAY." "NOW ESCAPE." "[ BOTH LAUGH ]" "NOW ESCAPE." "[ BOTH LAUGH ] I-IDON'TACTUALLYKNOWHOW" "[ BOTH LAUGH ] I-IDON'TACTUALLYKNOWHOW TO DO A ROPE ESCAPE." "I-IDON'TACTUALLYKNOWHOW TO DO A ROPE ESCAPE." "IS THERE A TRICK TO IT?" "TO DO A ROPE ESCAPE." "IS THERE A TRICK TO IT?" "THERE'SALWAYSATRICK." "I'LL TEACH YOU." "MAYBEWECOULDDOTHEACT TOGETHER." "MAYBEWECOULDDOTHEACT TOGETHER." "YOU COULD BE MY ASSISTANT." "TOGETHER." "YOU COULD BE MY ASSISTANT." "YOURASSISTANT?" "YOU COULD BE MY ASSISTANT." "YOURASSISTANT?" "YOUKNOWWHATIMEAN ." "YOURASSISTANT?" "YOUKNOWWHATIMEAN ." "NO,I DON'T." "YOUKNOWWHATIMEAN ." "NO,I DON'T." "I'M A MAGICIAN, NOT SOME BIMBO" "NO,I DON'T." "I'M A MAGICIAN, NOT SOME BIMBO WHO'S GONNA GET INTO A SKIMPY" "I'M A MAGICIAN, NOT SOME BIMBO WHO'S GONNA GET INTO A SKIMPY OUTFIT AND CARRY YOUR PROPS" "WHO'S GONNA GET INTO A SKIMPY OUTFIT AND CARRY YOUR PROPS AROUND LIKE SOME KIND OF SEX" "OUTFIT AND CARRY YOUR PROPS AROUND LIKE SOME KIND OF SEX SLAVE." "AROUND LIKE SOME KIND OF SEX SLAVE." "I-IDIDN'TMEANTHAT." "SLAVE." "I-IDIDN'TMEANTHAT." "YEAH,I ALWAYSWANTEDTOBE" "I-IDIDN'TMEANTHAT." "YEAH,I ALWAYSWANTEDTOBE THE ASSISTANT." "YEAH,I ALWAYSWANTEDTOBE THE ASSISTANT." "PEOPLE GET CONFUSED WHEN THEY" "THE ASSISTANT." "PEOPLE GET CONFUSED WHEN THEY SEE ME ALONE ON STAGE." "PEOPLE GET CONFUSED WHEN THEY SEE ME ALONE ON STAGE." "ASSISTANT." "SEE ME ALONE ON STAGE." "ASSISTANT." "WHAT A STUPID, SEXIST LABEL." "ASSISTANT." "WHAT A STUPID, SEXIST LABEL." "HALF THE TIME, THE ASSISTANTS" "WHAT A STUPID, SEXIST LABEL." "HALF THE TIME, THE ASSISTANTS ARE DOING WAY MORE WORK THAN THE" "HALF THE TIME, THE ASSISTANTS ARE DOING WAY MORE WORK THAN THE MAGICIANS, AND YET, THEY DON'T" "ARE DOING WAY MORE WORK THAN THE MAGICIANS, AND YET, THEY DON'T EVEN GET A BOW!" "MAGICIANS, AND YET, THEY DON'T EVEN GET A BOW!" "THEY ONLY GET THEIR FIRST NAME" "EVEN GET A BOW!" "THEY ONLY GET THEIR FIRST NAME UP ON THE MARQUEE IF THEY EVEN" "THEY ONLY GET THEIR FIRST NAME UP ON THE MARQUEE IF THEY EVEN GET A NAME AT ALL!" "UP ON THE MARQUEE IF THEY EVEN GET A NAME AT ALL!" "[GRUNTS]" "I WOULDN'T DO THAT." "OH,YEAH?" "I ONCE DID A SHOW WITH A GUY" "OH,YEAH?" "I ONCE DID A SHOW WITH A GUY WHERE I CUT HIM IN HALF." "I ONCE DID A SHOW WITH A GUY WHERE I CUT HIM IN HALF." "SO, IT'S LIKE A ROLE REVERSAL," "WHERE I CUT HIM IN HALF." "SO, IT'S LIKE A ROLE REVERSAL, RIGHT?" "SO, IT'S LIKE A ROLE REVERSAL, RIGHT?" "BUT BECAUSE HE'S THE GUY, AND" "RIGHT?" "BUT BECAUSE HE'S THE GUY, AND I'M THE CHICK, HE GETS BILLED AS" "BUT BECAUSE HE'S THE GUY, AND I'M THE CHICK, HE GETS BILLED AS THE MAGICIAN, AND I'M THE" "I'M THE CHICK, HE GETS BILLED AS THE MAGICIAN, AND I'M THE ASSISTANT." "THE MAGICIAN, AND I'M THE ASSISTANT." "I MEAN, AREN'T WE BOTH" "ASSISTANT." "I MEAN, AREN'T WE BOTH MAGICIANS?" "I MEAN, AREN'T WE BOTH MAGICIANS?" "WE'RE BOTH DOING THE SAME MAGIC" "MAGICIANS?" "WE'RE BOTH DOING THE SAME MAGIC TRICK." "WE'RE BOTH DOING THE SAME MAGIC TRICK." "IT'S JUST SO STUPID." "TRICK." "IT'S JUST SO STUPID." "IAGREEWITHYOU ." "IT'S JUST SO STUPID." "IAGREEWITHYOU ." "OH,YEAH." "IAGREEWITHYOU ." "OH,YEAH." "YOUR DICK AGREES WITH ME." "OH,YEAH." "YOUR DICK AGREES WITH ME." "SHE'STOTALLYRIGHT." "YOUR DICK AGREES WITH ME." "SHE'STOTALLYRIGHT." "THE ASSISTANT IS ALWAYS SMILING" "SHE'STOTALLYRIGHT." "THE ASSISTANT IS ALWAYS SMILING WHEN THE MAGICIAN CUTS HER IN" "THE ASSISTANT IS ALWAYS SMILING WHEN THE MAGICIAN CUTS HER IN HALF." "WHEN THE MAGICIAN CUTS HER IN HALF." "SMILING!" "HALF." "SMILING!" "SHE SHOULD BE SCREAMING FOR HER" "SMILING!" "SHE SHOULD BE SCREAMING FOR HER LIFE." "SHE SHOULD BE SCREAMING FOR HER LIFE." "YOU'REOVERTHINKINGTHIS," "LIFE." "YOU'REOVERTHINKINGTHIS, MAN." "YOU'REOVERTHINKINGTHIS, MAN." "ASSISTANTS ARE NEVER TRAINED" "MAN." "ASSISTANTS ARE NEVER TRAINED ACTORS OR MAGICIANS." "ASSISTANTS ARE NEVER TRAINED ACTORS OR MAGICIANS." "THEY'RE JUST GIRLFRIENDS OR" "ACTORS OR MAGICIANS." "THEY'RE JUST GIRLFRIENDS OR WIVES." "THEY'RE JUST GIRLFRIENDS OR WIVES." "UNLESS THEY'RE A GAY MAGICIAN." "WIVES." "UNLESS THEY'RE A GAY MAGICIAN." "THEN, IT'S THE SISTER." "UNLESS THEY'RE A GAY MAGICIAN." "THEN, IT'S THE SISTER." "IT'S A DEAD GIVEAWAY FOR A GAY" "THEN, IT'S THE SISTER." "IT'S A DEAD GIVEAWAY FOR A GAY MAGICIAN WHEN THE ASSISTANT IS" "IT'S A DEAD GIVEAWAY FOR A GAY MAGICIAN WHEN THE ASSISTANT IS THE SISTER." "MAGICIAN WHEN THE ASSISTANT IS THE SISTER." "YOUJUSTGAVEMEA GREAT" "THE SISTER." "YOUJUSTGAVEMEA GREAT IDEA." "YOUJUSTGAVEMEA GREAT IDEA." "I GOT IT." "I GOT THE ACT!" "IDEA." "I GOT IT." "I GOT THE ACT!" "THAT'SGREAT." "I GOT IT." "I GOT THE ACT!" "THAT'SGREAT." "I'MGONNAENTERTHE CONTEST." "THAT'SGREAT." "I'MGONNAENTERTHE CONTEST." "TERRIFIC." "I'MGONNAENTERTHE CONTEST." "TERRIFIC." "WITHSTACY." "TERRIFIC." "WITHSTACY." "REALLY?" "WITHSTACY." "REALLY?" "SHE'S A LITTLE VOLATILE." "REALLY?" "SHE'S A LITTLE VOLATILE." "WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK ANY OF" "SHE'S A LITTLE VOLATILE." "WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK ANY OF THE OTHER FEMALE MAGICIANS?" "WHY DON'T YOU JUST ASK ANY OF THE OTHER FEMALE MAGICIANS?" "ALLFIVEOF THEM." "THE OTHER FEMALE MAGICIANS?" "ALLFIVEOF THEM." "NO,NO." "IT HASTOBEHER." "ALLFIVEOF THEM." "NO,NO." "IT HASTOBEHER." "THERE'S NOBODY THAT'LL DO IT" "NO,NO." "IT HASTOBEHER." "THERE'S NOBODY THAT'LL DO IT BETTER." "[ MUMBLING ]" "HEY,BUDDY?" "YOU WANT TO MAKE SOME MONEY?" "WHEREISSHE?" "WHERE'SSTACY?" "YOU WANT TO MAKE SOME MONEY?" "WHEREISSHE?" "WHERE'SSTACY?" "THECHEATER." "WHEREISSHE?" "WHERE'SSTACY?" "THECHEATER." "BEAT IT." "THECHEATER." "BEAT IT." "THIS IS MY TURF." "BEAT IT." "THIS IS MY TURF." "I'MNOTLOOKINGFOR ANY" "THIS IS MY TURF." "I'MNOTLOOKINGFOR ANY  TROUBLE." "I'MNOTLOOKINGFOR ANY  TROUBLE." "I'M JUST LOOKING FOR STACY." "TROUBLE." "I'M JUST LOOKING FOR STACY." "WELL,IFYOU'RELOOKINGFOR" "I'M JUST LOOKING FOR STACY." "WELL,IFYOU'RELOOKINGFOR STACY, THEN YOU ARE LOOKING FOR" "WELL,IFYOU'RELOOKINGFOR STACY, THEN YOU ARE LOOKING FOR TROUBLE." "STACY, THEN YOU ARE LOOKING FOR TROUBLE." "SHE'SANOLDFRIENDOFMINE." "TROUBLE." "SHE'SANOLDFRIENDOFMINE." "I JUST WANT TO TALK TO HER." "SHE'SANOLDFRIENDOFMINE." "I JUST WANT TO TALK TO HER." "I" " DO YOU HAVE HER NUMBER?" "I JUST WANT TO TALK TO HER." "I" " DO YOU HAVE HER NUMBER?" "LOOK." "I" " DO YOU HAVE HER NUMBER?" "LOOK." "EVEN IF I DID, STACY'S NOT THE" "LOOK." "EVEN IF I DID, STACY'S NOT THE KIND OF WOMAN YOU REACH BY" "EVEN IF I DID, STACY'S NOT THE KIND OF WOMAN YOU REACH BY PHONE." "KIND OF WOMAN YOU REACH BY PHONE." "LOOK." "PHONE." "LOOK." "I'LL GIVE YOU 20 BUCKS IF YOU" "LOOK." "I'LL GIVE YOU 20 BUCKS IF YOU HELP ME FIND HER." "I'LL GIVE YOU 20 BUCKS IF YOU HELP ME FIND HER." "$20FORHER,$20 FOR ME." "HELP ME FIND HER." "$20FORHER,$20 FOR ME." "[SIGHS]" "$20FORHER,$20 FOR ME." "[SIGHS] FINE, FINE." "THERE'SA MAGICSHOWUPON THE CANNON." "SHE USED TO WORK THERE " " NOT" "THE CANNON." "SHE USED TO WORK THERE " " NOT ANYMORE." "SHE USED TO WORK THERE " " NOT ANYMORE." "BUT ABOVE THERE ARE SOME ROOMS." "ANYMORE." "BUT ABOVE THERE ARE SOME ROOMS." "ROOMS?" "BUT ABOVE THERE ARE SOME ROOMS." "ROOMS?" "YEAH,KINDOF AHALFWAYHOUSE" "ROOMS?" "YEAH,KINDOF AHALFWAYHOUSE FOR MAGICIANS." "YEAH,KINDOF AHALFWAYHOUSE FOR MAGICIANS." "BLAINE ONCE STAYED THERE." "FOR MAGICIANS." "BLAINE ONCE STAYED THERE." "DAVIDBLAINE?" "BLAINE ONCE STAYED THERE." "DAVIDBLAINE?" "AFTERHEFROZEHIMSELFUPON" "DAVIDBLAINE?" "AFTERHEFROZEHIMSELFUPON  THAT BLOCK OF ICE, HE WAS PRETTY" "AFTERHEFROZEHIMSELFUPON  THAT BLOCK OF ICE, HE WAS PRETTY MESSED UP." "THAT BLOCK OF ICE, HE WAS PRETTY MESSED UP." "GOOD LUCK." "[ SAW WHIRRING ]" "EXCUSEME?" "[ WHIRRING STOPS ] THESHOW'SAT 8: 00." "[ WHIRRING STOPS ] THESHOW'SAT 8: 00." "COME BACK TONIGHT." "THESHOW'SAT 8: 00." "COME BACK TONIGHT." "[ WHIRRING RESUMES ]" "COME BACK TONIGHT." "[ WHIRRING RESUMES ] I'MLOOKINGFORSTACYDIETZ!" "[ WHIRRING RESUMES ] I'MLOOKINGFORSTACYDIETZ!" "[ WHIRRING STOPS ]" "I'MLOOKINGFORSTACYDIETZ!" "[ WHIRRING STOPS ] AREYOUAMAGICIAN?" "[ WHIRRING STOPS ] AREYOUAMAGICIAN?" "YEAH." "AREYOUAMAGICIAN?" "YEAH." "YOUDOCHILDREN'SPARTIES?" "YEAH." "YOUDOCHILDREN'SPARTIES?" "YES,I DO" " CHANGEBAG ," "YOUDOCHILDREN'SPARTIES?" "YES,I DO" " CHANGEBAG , COLORING BOOK, YEAH." "YES,I DO" " CHANGEBAG , COLORING BOOK, YEAH." "YOU'RETOONICE." "COLORING BOOK, YEAH." "YOU'RETOONICE." "YOU CAN'T HANDLE HER." "YOU'RETOONICE." "YOU CAN'T HANDLE HER." "[ WHIRRING RESUMES ]" "YOU CAN'T HANDLE HER." "[ WHIRRING RESUMES ] I-ITHINKICAN ." "[ WHIRRING RESUMES ] I-ITHINKICAN ." "I'M GONNA TRY TO HELP HER GET" "I-ITHINKICAN ." "I'M GONNA TRY TO HELP HER GET OUT OF THIS PLACE." "I'M GONNA TRY TO HELP HER GET OUT OF THIS PLACE." "UPTHOSESTEPS." "OUT OF THIS PLACE." "UPTHOSESTEPS." "YOU'LL NEED THIS, LANCELOT." "[ WAND RATTLES ]" "[ DOOR CREAKS ]" "[GROANING]" "WE'REFULL." "ISSTACYHERE?" "WHATAREYOU,ADEBT" "ISSTACYHERE?" "WHATAREYOU,ADEBT  COLLECTOR?" "WHATAREYOU,ADEBT  COLLECTOR?" "NO,I 'MA MAGICIAN." "COLLECTOR?" "NO,I 'MA MAGICIAN." "[LAUGHS]" "NO,I 'MA MAGICIAN." "[LAUGHS] WELL, YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE ONE," "[LAUGHS] WELL, YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE ONE, BANANA BOY." "WELL, YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE ONE, BANANA BOY." "7 OF SPADES." "BANANA BOY." "7 OF SPADES." "FIND IT." "HA!" "YEAH." "MAGICIAN." "HUH!" "NOT BAD..." "FOR A JUGGLER." "THAT'S NOT THE 7 OF SPADES." "NOWTELLME WHERESHE IS." "[SIGHS] KEEP THE DECK." "[SIGHS] KEEP THE DECK." "THEIR MARKINGS WILL LEAD YOU TO" "KEEP THE DECK." "THEIR MARKINGS WILL LEAD YOU TO HER." "THEIR MARKINGS WILL LEAD YOU TO HER." "ALL RIGHT?" "[SIGHS]" "CAN'TFINDTHEMARKINGS,HUH?" "I'VE SEEN JUST ABOUT EVERY MARK THAT THERE IS." "I'VE SEEN JUST ABOUT EVERY MARK THAT THERE IS." "AS A MATTER OF FACT, I'VE" "THAT THERE IS." "AS A MATTER OF FACT, I'VE INVENTED A FEW OF THEM." "AS A MATTER OF FACT, I'VE INVENTED A FEW OF THEM." "OH." "INVENTED A FEW OF THEM." "OH." "Y-YOUSEETHEM?" "OH." "Y-YOUSEETHEM?" "SURE." "Y-YOUSEETHEM?" "SURE." "IT'S BEEN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU" "SURE." "IT'S BEEN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU ALL THE TIME." "IT'S BEEN RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU ALL THE TIME." "REALLY?" "ALL THE TIME." "REALLY?" "IT'SNOTTHEBACKORTHE" "REALLY?" "IT'SNOTTHEBACKORTHE FRONT." "IT'SNOTTHEBACKORTHE FRONT." "THIS GETS A LITTLE STRANGE ON" "FRONT." "THIS GETS A LITTLE STRANGE ON THE SIDE..." "THIS GETS A LITTLE STRANGE ON THE SIDE..." "SORT OF LIKE MY EX-WIFE" "THE SIDE..." "SORT OF LIKE MY EX-WIFE BUT IF YOU USE THE GOLD TRIFECTA" "SORT OF LIKE MY EX-WIFE BUT IF YOU USE THE GOLD TRIFECTA CUT WITH THE HIGH FLIP AND" "BUT IF YOU USE THE GOLD TRIFECTA CUT WITH THE HIGH FLIP AND INTERNAL SHUFFLE..." "CUT WITH THE HIGH FLIP AND INTERNAL SHUFFLE..." "DOES "3  FAIRFAX" MEAN ANYTHING" "INTERNAL SHUFFLE..." "DOES "3  FAIRFAX" MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?" "DOES "3  FAIRFAX" MEAN ANYTHING TO YOU?" "THIRDANDFAIRFAX?" "TO YOU?" "THIRDANDFAIRFAX?" "ISN'T THAT THE FARMERS MARKET?" "THIRDANDFAIRFAX?" "ISN'T THAT THE FARMERS MARKET?" "ITSUREIS ." "ISN'T THAT THE FARMERS MARKET?" "ITSUREIS ." "THANKS,JACK." "ITSUREIS ." "THANKS,JACK." "OH,SURE,GUYS." "THANKS,JACK." "OH,SURE,GUYS." "[ BELL JINGLES ]" "OH,SURE,GUYS." "[ BELL JINGLES ] DOYOUKNOWWHATTHIS IS?" "[ BELL JINGLES ] DOYOUKNOWWHATTHIS IS?" "THE4 OFHEARTS?" "DOYOUKNOWWHATTHIS IS?" "THE4 OFHEARTS?" "WELL,YEAH!" "THE4 OFHEARTS?" "WELL,YEAH!" "OF COURSE YOU WOULD KNOW THAT" "WELL,YEAH!" "OF COURSE YOU WOULD KNOW THAT 'CAUSE I SHOWED YOU THE CARD." "OF COURSE YOU WOULD KNOW THAT 'CAUSE I SHOWED YOU THE CARD." "WELL, YOU WOULD PROBABLY KNOW" "'CAUSE I SHOWED YOU THE CARD." "WELL, YOU WOULD PROBABLY KNOW THAT EVEN IF I DIDN'T SHOW YOU" "WELL, YOU WOULD PROBABLY KNOW THAT EVEN IF I DIDN'T SHOW YOU THE CARD." "THAT EVEN IF I DIDN'T SHOW YOU THE CARD." "BUT WHAT KIND OF A 4 OF HEARTS?" "THE CARD." "BUT WHAT KIND OF A 4 OF HEARTS?" "I-I'MSORRY." "DO IKNOWYOU?" "BUT WHAT KIND OF A 4 OF HEARTS?" "I-I'MSORRY." "DO IKNOWYOU?" "IT'STHE4OFHEARTSWITHMY" "I-I'MSORRY." "DO IKNOWYOU?" "IT'STHE4OFHEARTSWITHMY DNA." "IT'STHE4OFHEARTSWITHMY DNA." "SEE?" "THE LIPSTICK." "DNA." "SEE?" "THE LIPSTICK." "WEHAVETO GO ." "SEE?" "THE LIPSTICK." "WEHAVETO GO ." "WAIT." "HOLDON ." "WEHAVETO GO ." "WAIT." "HOLDON ." "YOU SAW MY SHOW?" "WAIT." "HOLDON ." "YOU SAW MY SHOW?" "DON'TYOUREMEMBER?" "YOU SAW MY SHOW?" "DON'TYOUREMEMBER?" "I'M ELLEN." "DON'TYOUREMEMBER?" "I'M ELLEN." "LAST WEEK, THE MAGIC PALACE?" "I'M ELLEN." "LAST WEEK, THE MAGIC PALACE?" "YEAH,RIGHT." "LAST WEEK, THE MAGIC PALACE?" "YEAH,RIGHT." "SéANCE ROOM, RIGHT?" "YEAH,RIGHT." "SéANCE ROOM, RIGHT?" "NO!" "SéANCE ROOM, RIGHT?" "NO!" "YOU BROUGHT ME UP AS YOUR" "NO!" "YOU BROUGHT ME UP AS YOUR VOLUNTEER, AND I PICKED THIS" "YOU BROUGHT ME UP AS YOUR VOLUNTEER, AND I PICKED THIS CARD, AND YOU FOUND IT." "VOLUNTEER, AND I PICKED THIS CARD, AND YOU FOUND IT." "AND NOW I FOUND YOU." "CARD, AND YOU FOUND IT." "AND NOW I FOUND YOU." "YOUSUREHAVE." "AND NOW I FOUND YOU." "YOUSUREHAVE." "ALLRIGHT,GETHER NUMBER." "YOUSUREHAVE." "ALLRIGHT,GETHER NUMBER." "WE HAVE TO GO." "ALLRIGHT,GETHER NUMBER." "WE HAVE TO GO." "IKEPTTHISCARDUNDERMY" "WE HAVE TO GO." "IKEPTTHISCARDUNDERMY PILLOW THIS WHOLE TIME." "IKEPTTHISCARDUNDERMY PILLOW THIS WHOLE TIME." "WOW." "PILLOW THIS WHOLE TIME." "WOW." "THAT MUST BE A VERY HAPPY CARD." "WOW." "THAT MUST BE A VERY HAPPY CARD." "ICAMEHEREEVERYDAYLOOKING" "THAT MUST BE A VERY HAPPY CARD." "ICAMEHEREEVERYDAYLOOKING FOR YOU." "ICAMEHEREEVERYDAYLOOKING FOR YOU." "BUT I'M NOT A STALKER." "FOR YOU." "BUT I'M NOT A STALKER." "DON'T THINK I'M WEIRD." "BUT I'M NOT A STALKER." "DON'T THINK I'M WEIRD." "MEETMEAT THEFARMERS" "DON'T THINK I'M WEIRD." "MEETMEAT THEFARMERS MARKET." "MEETMEAT THEFARMERS MARKET." "I'M GOING." "MARKET." "I'M GOING." "WAIT!" "I'M GOING." "WAIT!" "CAN YOU JUST TAKE A QUICK" "WAIT!" "CAN YOU JUST TAKE A QUICK PICTURE OF THE TWO OF US FOR" "CAN YOU JUST TAKE A QUICK PICTURE OF THE TWO OF US FOR FACEBOOK?" "PICTURE OF THE TWO OF US FOR FACEBOOK?" "SURE." "FACEBOOK?" "SURE." "[ SIGHS ]" "SURE." "[ SIGHS ] [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ]" "[ SIGHS ] [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] Oh,wow!" "[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] Oh,wow!" "Oh!" "Oh,wow!" "Oh!" "GOING TO THE PARK WITH" "Oh!" "GOING TO THE PARK WITH STEVE KRAMER." "GOING TO THE PARK WITH STEVE KRAMER." "POST!" "STEVE KRAMER." "POST!" "[ LAUGHS ]" "POST!" "[ LAUGHS ] WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE" "[ LAUGHS ] WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE PERFORMING AT THE" "WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE PERFORMING AT THE B.M. CONVENTION, I THOUGHT YOU" "PERFORMING AT THE B.M. CONVENTION, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT BOWEL MOVEMENT." "B.M. CONVENTION, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT BOWEL MOVEMENT." "BUT NOW I GET IT." "MEANT BOWEL MOVEMENT." "BUT NOW I GET IT." "YOU MEANT B.M. " "BUT NOW I GET IT." "YOU MEANT B.M. -- BROTHERHOOD OF MAGICIANS." "YOU MEANT B.M. -- BROTHERHOOD OF MAGICIANS." "I MEAN, THE BIGGEST MAGIC" "BROTHERHOOD OF MAGICIANS." "I MEAN, THE BIGGEST MAGIC CONVENTION IN THE WORLD." "I MEAN, THE BIGGEST MAGIC CONVENTION IN THE WORLD." "I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY CALL IT A" "CONVENTION IN THE WORLD." "I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY CALL IT A BROTHERHOOD, BY THE WAY." "I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY CALL IT A BROTHERHOOD, BY THE WAY." "THAT IS SO SEXIST." "BROTHERHOOD, BY THE WAY." "THAT IS SO SEXIST." "THEY SHOULD TOTALLY CHANGE THAT" "THAT IS SO SEXIST." "THEY SHOULD TOTALLY CHANGE THAT NAME." "THEY SHOULD TOTALLY CHANGE THAT NAME." "NOWTHENEEDLEGOESTHROUGH" "NAME." "NOWTHENEEDLEGOESTHROUGH MY STOMACH." "NOWTHENEEDLEGOESTHROUGH MY STOMACH." "IMEAN,WHATABOUTTHEFEMALE" "MY STOMACH." "IMEAN,WHATABOUTTHEFEMALE MAGICIANS?" "IMEAN,WHATABOUTTHEFEMALE MAGICIANS?" "LIKE, ARE THEY PART OF SOME" "MAGICIANS?" "LIKE, ARE THEY PART OF SOME BROTHERHOOD?" "LIKE, ARE THEY PART OF SOME BROTHERHOOD?" "THAT IS SO SEXIST." "BROTHERHOOD?" "THAT IS SO SEXIST." "THEY SHOULD GO ON STRIKE." "THAT IS SO SEXIST." "THEY SHOULD GO ON STRIKE." "I'LLBERIGHTBACK." "THEY SHOULD GO ON STRIKE." "I'LLBERIGHTBACK." "OH,OKAY." "GOODLUCK!" "[ CROWD GROANING ] 9-1-1,ANYONE?" "GROSS." "9-1-1,ANYONE?" "GROSS." "[ GROANING CONTINUES ]" "[ GROANING CONTINUES ] [ CROWD APPLAUDS ]" "HALLELUJAH." "THERE IS A GOD." "ALL RIGHT." "THERE IS A GOD." "ALL RIGHT." "THAT'S THE SHOW, EVERYBODY." "ALL RIGHT." "THAT'S THE SHOW, EVERYBODY." "THANKS SO MUCH." "THAT'S THE SHOW, EVERYBODY." "THANKS SO MUCH." "I DID MY PART." "THANKS SO MUCH." "I DID MY PART." "NOW IT'S YOUR TURN." "I DID MY PART." "NOW IT'S YOUR TURN." "IF YOU ENJOYED THE SHOW, PLACE" "NOW IT'S YOUR TURN." "IF YOU ENJOYED THE SHOW, PLACE SOMETHING IN THE HAT." "IF YOU ENJOYED THE SHOW, PLACE SOMETHING IN THE HAT." "THANK YOU." "SOMETHING IN THE HAT." "THANK YOU." "IDIDN'TLIKETHE LASTONE." "THANK YOU." "IDIDN'TLIKETHE LASTONE." "OH,YOULOVEDIT." "ISAWYOU." "IDIDN'TLIKETHE LASTONE." "OH,YOULOVEDIT." "ISAWYOU." "COOLSHOW." "OH,YOULOVEDIT." "ISAWYOU." "COOLSHOW." "THANKYOU." "THANKS." "COOLSHOW." "THANKYOU." "THANKS." "GREATSHOW." "THANKYOU." "THANKS." "GREATSHOW." "ITCOULDN'THAVEBEENTHAT" "GREATSHOW." "ITCOULDN'THAVEBEENTHAT  GREAT IF IT'S ONLY WORTH A BUCK." "ITCOULDN'THAVEBEENTHAT  GREAT IF IT'S ONLY WORTH A BUCK." "ICAMETO APOLOGIZE." "GREAT IF IT'S ONLY WORTH A BUCK." "ICAMETO APOLOGIZE." "NONEED." "ICAMETO APOLOGIZE." "NONEED." "SO,WE'REGOOD?" "NONEED." "SO,WE'REGOOD?" "WE'RENOTHING." "SO,WE'REGOOD?" "WE'RENOTHING." "IWROTEAN ACTBASEDONWHAT" "WE'RENOTHING." "IWROTEAN ACTBASEDONWHAT YOU SAID ABOUT MAGIC ASSISTANTS." "IWROTEAN ACTBASEDONWHAT YOU SAID ABOUT MAGIC ASSISTANTS." "I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT THAT" "YOU SAID ABOUT MAGIC ASSISTANTS." "I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT THAT WAY." "I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT IT THAT WAY." "IT REALLY OPENED MY EYES." "WAY." "IT REALLY OPENED MY EYES." "AREYOUDOINGTHE CONTEST?" "IT REALLY OPENED MY EYES." "AREYOUDOINGTHE CONTEST?" "YES." "AREYOUDOINGTHE CONTEST?" "YES." "BUT I WANT TO DO IT WITH YOU " "YES." "BUT I WANT TO DO IT WITH YOU -- PARTNERS." "BUT I WANT TO DO IT WITH YOU -- PARTNERS." "WHAT'STHEACT?" "PARTNERS." "WHAT'STHEACT?" "WELL,YOU'RENOTMY" "WHAT'STHEACT?" "WELL,YOU'RENOTMY ASSISTANT, BUT YOU PLAY MY" "WELL,YOU'RENOTMY ASSISTANT, BUT YOU PLAY MY ASSISTANT." "ASSISTANT, BUT YOU PLAY MY ASSISTANT." "IT'S LIKE AN ACTING ROLE, BUT" "ASSISTANT." "IT'S LIKE AN ACTING ROLE, BUT YOU HAVE THE UPPER HAND." "IT'S LIKE AN ACTING ROLE, BUT YOU HAVE THE UPPER HAND." "UH-HUH." "YOU HAVE THE UPPER HAND." "UH-HUH." "AND WHAT PART DO YOU PLAY?" "UH-HUH." "AND WHAT PART DO YOU PLAY?" "THEMAGICIAN." "AND WHAT PART DO YOU PLAY?" "THEMAGICIAN." "J-JUST READ IT AND TELL ME WHAT" "THEMAGICIAN." "J-JUST READ IT AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK." "J-JUST READ IT AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK." "SURE." "THANKS." "YOU THINK." "SURE." "THANKS." "IT'S PERFECT." "SURE." "THANKS." "IT'S PERFECT." "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, ONE" "IT'S PERFECT." "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, ONE MOMENT, PLEASE." "LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, ONE MOMENT, PLEASE." "THIS MAN " " THIS MAN HERE WANTS" "MOMENT, PLEASE." "THIS MAN " " THIS MAN HERE WANTS TO BE A MAGICIAN." "THIS MAN " " THIS MAN HERE WANTS TO BE A MAGICIAN." "ISN'T THAT CUTE?" "TO BE A MAGICIAN." "ISN'T THAT CUTE?" "SO, WE'RE GONNA LET HIM DO ONE" "ISN'T THAT CUTE?" "SO, WE'RE GONNA LET HIM DO ONE TRICK." "SO, WE'RE GONNA LET HIM DO ONE TRICK." "SO, SIR, TAKE THIS AND TEAR IT" "TRICK." "SO, SIR, TAKE THIS AND TEAR IT UP INTO AS MANY PIECES AS YOU" "SO, SIR, TAKE THIS AND TEAR IT UP INTO AS MANY PIECES AS YOU CAN." "UP INTO AS MANY PIECES AS YOU CAN." "COME ON." "CAN." "COME ON." "RIPIT!" "COMEON!" "COME ON." "RIPIT!" "COMEON!" "DOIT!" "DO IT !" "RIPIT!" "COMEON!" "DOIT!" "DO IT !" "DOIT." "DOIT!" "DO IT !" "DOIT." "OH!" "DOIT." "OH!" "THERE YOU GO." "OH!" "THERE YOU GO." "YEAH!" "THERE YOU GO." "YEAH!" "NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SAY" "YEAH!" "NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SAY THE MAGIC WORDS." "NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SAY THE MAGIC WORDS." "ABRACADABRA." "THE MAGIC WORDS." "ABRACADABRA." "OH,LOOK!" "ABRACADABRA." "OH,LOOK!" "HE REALLY IS A MAGICIAN!" "OH,LOOK!" "HE REALLY IS A MAGICIAN!" "[ CROWD APPLAUDS ]" "HE REALLY IS A MAGICIAN!" "[ CROWD APPLAUDS ] HE'S GOT A WIZARD'S HAT." "[ CROWD APPLAUDS ] HE'S GOT A WIZARD'S HAT." "[ LAUGHS ]" "HE'S GOT A WIZARD'S HAT." "[ LAUGHS ] YES!" "[ LAUGHS ] YES!" "SHEISGOOD." "YES!" "SHEISGOOD." "GOT TO GIVE HER THAT." "SHEISGOOD." "GOT TO GIVE HER THAT." "AW,DON'TBE SAD." "GOT TO GIVE HER THAT." "AW,DON'TBE SAD." "I'LL BE YOUR ASSISTANT?" "AW,DON'TBE SAD." "I'LL BE YOUR ASSISTANT?" "REALLY?" "I'LL BE YOUR ASSISTANT?" "REALLY?" "WE HAVE TO PUT IT TOGETHER IN," "REALLY?" "WE HAVE TO PUT IT TOGETHER IN, LIKE, THREE DAYS." "WE HAVE TO PUT IT TOGETHER IN, LIKE, THREE DAYS." "HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON STAGE?" "LIKE, THREE DAYS." "HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON STAGE?" "[LAUGHS]" "HAVE YOU EVER BEEN ON STAGE?" "[LAUGHS] OF COURSE." "[LAUGHS] OF COURSE." "I'VE BEEN AN ACTRESS MY WHOLE" "OF COURSE." "I'VE BEEN AN ACTRESS MY WHOLE LIFE." "I'VE BEEN AN ACTRESS MY WHOLE LIFE." "I WON BEST ACTRESS." "LIFE." "I WON BEST ACTRESS." "ALLRIGHT." "I WON BEST ACTRESS." "ALLRIGHT." "LET'S GIVE IT A TRY." "ALLRIGHT." "LET'S GIVE IT A TRY." "DON'TI LOOKGORGEOUS?" "LET'S GIVE IT A TRY." "DON'TI LOOKGORGEOUS?" "HUH?" "DON'TI LOOKGORGEOUS?" "HUH?" "[ LAUGHS ]" "SAY, "LINKING RINGS." Both:" "LINKINGRINGS." "[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ]" "Both:" "LINKINGRINGS." "[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] I'MGONNAPOSTYOURPICTURE" "[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] I'MGONNAPOSTYOURPICTURE ON FACEBOOK." "I'MGONNAPOSTYOURPICTURE ON FACEBOOK." "OFF TO SAN DIEGO TO WIN A MAGIC" "ON FACEBOOK." "OFF TO SAN DIEGO TO WIN A MAGIC COMPETITION WITH MY MAGIC" "OFF TO SAN DIEGO TO WIN A MAGIC COMPETITION WITH MY MAGIC PARTNER." "COMPETITION WITH MY MAGIC PARTNER." "AND MY BOYFRIEND." "PARTNER." "AND MY BOYFRIEND." "[ LAUGHS ]" "AND MY BOYFRIEND." "[ LAUGHS ] POST." "[ LAUGHS ] POST." "IT'SGONNABE VERY" "POST." "IT'SGONNABE VERY COMPETITIVE." "IT'SGONNABE VERY COMPETITIVE." "I JUST WANT TO MAKE THE FINALS," "COMPETITIVE." "I JUST WANT TO MAKE THE FINALS, BECAUSE THEN YOU GET TO DO THE" "I JUST WANT TO MAKE THE FINALS, BECAUSE THEN YOU GET TO DO THE ACT IN A HUGE THEATER FOR, LIKE," "BECAUSE THEN YOU GET TO DO THE ACT IN A HUGE THEATER FOR, LIKE, A THOUSAND PEOPLE." "ACT IN A HUGE THEATER FOR, LIKE, A THOUSAND PEOPLE." "WELL,IT'SAGREATACT." "A THOUSAND PEOPLE." "WELL,IT'SAGREATACT." "WE'RE TOTALLY GONNA WIN." "WELL,IT'SAGREATACT." "WE'RE TOTALLY GONNA WIN." "AND THEN, WE'RE GONNA GET BOOKED" "WE'RE TOTALLY GONNA WIN." "AND THEN, WE'RE GONNA GET BOOKED TO THE MAGIC PALACE, AND THEN" "AND THEN, WE'RE GONNA GET BOOKED TO THE MAGIC PALACE, AND THEN WE'RE GONNA BE STEVE'S OPENING" "TO THE MAGIC PALACE, AND THEN WE'RE GONNA BE STEVE'S OPENING ACT." "WE'RE GONNA BE STEVE'S OPENING ACT." "AND WE'RE GONNA TRAVEL THE" "ACT." "AND WE'RE GONNA TRAVEL THE COUNTRY AND THE WORLD." "AND WE'RE GONNA TRAVEL THE COUNTRY AND THE WORLD." "YOUMINDIF IJUSTPUTON" "COUNTRY AND THE WORLD." "YOUMINDIF IJUSTPUTON SOME MUSIC?" "YOUMINDIF IJUSTPUTON SOME MUSIC?" "THAT'SA REALLYGOODIDEA." "SOME MUSIC?" "THAT'SA REALLYGOODIDEA." "NO,THAT'STOTALLYFINE." "THAT'SA REALLYGOODIDEA." "NO,THAT'STOTALLYFINE." "[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]" "[ LAUGHS ]" "♪ AND IT THREW OFF MY WHOLE DAY ♪ ♪ JUST THE LET THE MYSTERY BE" "MY WHOLE DAY ♪ ♪ JUST THE LET THE MYSTERY BE ABOUT THE BIRDS AND TREES ♪" "[ CROWD APPLAUDS ]" "[ MUSIC CONTINUES ]" "[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]" "I'MHERETO REHEARSE." "WHAT'SWRONG?" "NOTHING." "WHAT'SWRONG?" "NOTHING." "LET'S JUST DO IT." "NOTHING." "LET'S JUST DO IT." "WHYDOYOUHAVEYOUR BAGS ?" "LET'S JUST DO IT." "WHYDOYOUHAVEYOUR BAGS ?" "STEVEBROKEUP WITHME." "WHYDOYOUHAVEYOUR BAGS ?" "STEVEBROKEUP WITHME." "OH,GREAT." "STEVEBROKEUP WITHME." "OH,GREAT." "IT'SNOTGREAT." "OH,GREAT." "IT'SNOTGREAT." "NO,I KNOW." "I'MREALLYSORRY." "IT'SNOTGREAT." "NO,I KNOW." "I'MREALLYSORRY." "JUSTSTART." "NO,I KNOW." "I'MREALLYSORRY." "JUSTSTART." "GOODEVENING,LADIESAND" "JUSTSTART." "GOODEVENING,LADIESAND  GENTLEMEN." "GOODEVENING,LADIESAND  GENTLEMEN." "MY NAME IS JASON KANT, AND THIS" "GENTLEMEN." "MY NAME IS JASON KANT, AND THIS IS MY LOVELY ASSISTANT, ELLEN." "MY NAME IS JASON KANT, AND THIS IS MY LOVELY ASSISTANT, ELLEN." "ICAN'TDO THIS." "IS MY LOVELY ASSISTANT, ELLEN." "ICAN'TDO THIS." "I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO" "ICAN'TDO THIS." "I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS." "I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS." "WHATDOYOUMEAN?" "THIS." "WHATDOYOUMEAN?" "ITHINKYOUSHOULDGET" "WHATDOYOUMEAN?" "ITHINKYOUSHOULDGET SOMEONE ELSE." "ITHINKYOUSHOULDGET SOMEONE ELSE." "I'M TOO SCARED." "SOMEONE ELSE." "I'M TOO SCARED." "BUTTHECONTESTISTOMORROW." "I'M TOO SCARED." "BUTTHECONTESTISTOMORROW." "I'MSORRY." "THISISTOOHARD." "BUTTHECONTESTISTOMORROW." "I'MSORRY." "THISISTOOHARD." "YOU'REDOINGGREAT." "I'MSORRY." "THISISTOOHARD." "YOU'REDOINGGREAT." "YOU'RE VERY FUNNY." "YOU'REDOINGGREAT." "YOU'RE VERY FUNNY." "BUTI KEEPTHINKINGOFSTEVE," "YOU'RE VERY FUNNY." "BUTI KEEPTHINKINGOFSTEVE, AND IT'S MESSING ME UP." "BUTI KEEPTHINKINGOFSTEVE, AND IT'S MESSING ME UP." "AND WHAT IF THE AUDIENCE SEES" "AND IT'S MESSING ME UP." "AND WHAT IF THE AUDIENCE SEES WHAT I DO, AND I GIVE AWAY THE" "AND WHAT IF THE AUDIENCE SEES WHAT I DO, AND I GIVE AWAY THE TRICK?" "WHAT I DO, AND I GIVE AWAY THE TRICK?" "THEYWON'T." "YOUWON 'T." "TRICK?" "THEYWON'T." "YOUWON 'T." "HOWDOYOUKNOWTHAT ?" "THEYWON'T." "YOUWON 'T." "HOWDOYOUKNOWTHAT ?" "WE'VE BEEN REHEARSING IT" "HOWDOYOUKNOWTHAT ?" "WE'VE BEEN REHEARSING IT NONSTOP, AND I'M STILL MESSING" "WE'VE BEEN REHEARSING IT NONSTOP, AND I'M STILL MESSING UP THE MAGIC." "NONSTOP, AND I'M STILL MESSING UP THE MAGIC." "[ CRYING ]" "UP THE MAGIC." "[ CRYING ] IFYOUMESSUPTHETRICK ," "[ CRYING ] IFYOUMESSUPTHETRICK , I'LL COVER FOR YOU." "IFYOUMESSUPTHETRICK , I'LL COVER FOR YOU." "I HAVE OUTS." "I'LL COVER FOR YOU." "I HAVE OUTS." "IT'SLIKEWE ONLYGET ONE" "I HAVE OUTS." "IT'SLIKEWE ONLYGET ONE  SHOT, AND WE HAVE TO GET THE" "IT'SLIKEWE ONLYGET ONE  SHOT, AND WE HAVE TO GET THE LINES RIGHT, AND WE HAVE TO" "SHOT, AND WE HAVE TO GET THE LINES RIGHT, AND WE HAVE TO RESPOND TO WHAT THE VOLUNTEER" "LINES RIGHT, AND WE HAVE TO RESPOND TO WHAT THE VOLUNTEER SAYS, AND THEY HAVE TO MAKE" "RESPOND TO WHAT THE VOLUNTEER SAYS, AND THEY HAVE TO MAKE THIS MAGIC TRICK HAPPEN." "SAYS, AND THEY HAVE TO MAKE THIS MAGIC TRICK HAPPEN." "AND IT'S JUST TOO MUCH" "THIS MAGIC TRICK HAPPEN." "AND IT'S JUST TOO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY." "AND IT'S JUST TOO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY." "YOU'LLBEFINE." "RESPONSIBILITY." "YOU'LLBEFINE." "THIS IS WHAT ALL YOUR ACTING" "YOU'LLBEFINE." "THIS IS WHAT ALL YOUR ACTING TRAINING PREPARED YOU FOR." "THIS IS WHAT ALL YOUR ACTING TRAINING PREPARED YOU FOR." "ILIED." "TRAINING PREPARED YOU FOR." "ILIED." "I LIED!" "ILIED." "I LIED!" "I'VE NEVER ACTED BEFORE IN MY" "I LIED!" "I'VE NEVER ACTED BEFORE IN MY LIFE." "I'VE NEVER ACTED BEFORE IN MY LIFE." "I'M SO SCARED!" "LIFE." "I'M SO SCARED!" "I'M IN OVER MY HEAD." "I'M SO SCARED!" "I'M IN OVER MY HEAD." "PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME DO THIS." "I'M IN OVER MY HEAD." "PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME DO THIS." "YOU'REGONNABE FINE." "PLEASE DON'T MAKE ME DO THIS." "YOU'REGONNABE FINE." "YOU'LL GET UP THERE, AND THE" "YOU'REGONNABE FINE." "YOU'LL GET UP THERE, AND THE AUDIENCE WILL BE LAUGHING." "YOU'LL GET UP THERE, AND THE AUDIENCE WILL BE LAUGHING." "YOU'LL SEE." "AUDIENCE WILL BE LAUGHING." "YOU'LL SEE." "AND YOU'LL RELAX." "YOU'LL SEE." "AND YOU'LL RELAX." "YOUTHINKI'MFUNNY?" "AND YOU'LL RELAX." "YOUTHINKI'MFUNNY?" "ABSOLUTELY." "YOUTHINKI'MFUNNY?" "ABSOLUTELY." "[SNIFFLES]" "ABSOLUTELY." "[SNIFFLES] OKAY." "[SNIFFLES] OKAY." "OKAY, I'LL DO THE ACT." "OKAY." "OKAY, I'LL DO THE ACT." "YOU'LLBETERRIFIC." "OKAY, I'LL DO THE ACT." "YOU'LLBETERRIFIC." "WE'LL BE TERRIFIC." "YOU'LLBETERRIFIC." "WE'LL BE TERRIFIC." "YOU'REAWESOME." "WE'LL BE TERRIFIC." "YOU'REAWESOME." "UH..." "YOU'REAWESOME." "UH..." "MAYBE..." "MAYBE WE SHOULD KEEP" "UH..." "MAYBE..." "MAYBE WE SHOULD KEEP THIS PROFESSIONAL." "MAYBE..." "MAYBE WE SHOULD KEEP THIS PROFESSIONAL." "YOU..." "THIS PROFESSIONAL." "YOU..." "YOU DON'T FIND ME ATTRACTIVE?" "YOU..." "YOU DON'T FIND ME ATTRACTIVE?" "OFCOURSEIFINDYOU" "YOU DON'T FIND ME ATTRACTIVE?" "OFCOURSEIFINDYOU ATTRACTIVE." "OFCOURSEIFINDYOU ATTRACTIVE." "OH." "ATTRACTIVE." "OH." "OH." "OH." "OH." "I THINK I LIKE YOUR LIPS BETTER" "OH." "I THINK I LIKE YOUR LIPS BETTER THAN STEVE'S." "I THINK I LIKE YOUR LIPS BETTER THAN STEVE'S." "I'MSORTOF " " I'MSORTOF" "THAN STEVE'S." "I'MSORTOF " " I'MSORTOF SEEING SOMEONE." "I'MSORTOF " " I'MSORTOF SEEING SOMEONE." "[LAUGHS]" "SEEING SOMEONE." "[LAUGHS] LYING!" "[LAUGHS] LYING!" "STEVE TOLD ME YOU HAVEN'T HAD A" "LYING!" "STEVE TOLD ME YOU HAVEN'T HAD A GIRLFRIEND IN MONTHS." "STEVE TOLD ME YOU HAVEN'T HAD A GIRLFRIEND IN MONTHS." "IJUST..." "GIRLFRIEND IN MONTHS." "IJUST..." "I JUST THINK..." "IJUST..." "I JUST THINK..." "I JUST THINK IT MIGHT COMPLICATE" "I JUST THINK..." "I JUST THINK IT MIGHT COMPLICATE THINGS." "I JUST THINK IT MIGHT COMPLICATE THINGS." "AREYOUREJECTINGME?" "THINGS." "AREYOUREJECTINGME?" "'CAUSE I CANNOT TAKE A SECOND" "AREYOUREJECTINGME?" "'CAUSE I CANNOT TAKE A SECOND REJECTION IN ONE DAY." "'CAUSE I CANNOT TAKE A SECOND REJECTION IN ONE DAY." "YOU BETTER NOT BE REJECTING ME." "REJECTION IN ONE DAY." "YOU BETTER NOT BE REJECTING ME." "NO,I 'MNOT..." "YOU BETTER NOT BE REJECTING ME." "NO,I 'MNOT..." "I'M NOT REJECTING YOU." "NO,I 'MNOT..." "I'M NOT REJECTING YOU." "YOU'RESUCHAGOODGUY." "I'M NOT REJECTING YOU." "YOU'RESUCHAGOODGUY." "I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T SEE IT" "YOU'RESUCHAGOODGUY." "I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE." "THECONTESTMEETINGWILL BEGIN SHORTLY." "SHUTTLES BETWEEN THE MAGISH INN" "BEGIN SHORTLY." "SHUTTLES BETWEEN THE MAGISH INN AND THE SAN DIEGO HOTEL AND" "SHUTTLES BETWEEN THE MAGISH INN AND THE SAN DIEGO HOTEL AND DEALERS ROOM LEAVE EVERY" "AND THE SAN DIEGO HOTEL AND DEALERS ROOM LEAVE EVERY 15 MINUTES." "DEALERS ROOM LEAVE EVERY 15 MINUTES." "DIDYOUSEETHAT?" "15 MINUTES." "DIDYOUSEETHAT?" "DID YOU SEE THAT?" "DIDYOUSEETHAT?" "DID YOU SEE THAT?" "NO." "DID YOU SEE THAT?" "NO." "WATCHTHEWAND." "NO." "WATCHTHEWAND." "[GASPS]" "WATCHTHEWAND." "[GASPS] DIDYOUSEETHAT?" "WELCOME,EVERYONE." "POOF!" "[ WOMAN GASPS ]" "POOF!" "[ WOMAN GASPS ] SIM SALA BIM." "[ WOMAN GASPS ] SIM SALA BIM." "HOPEFUL CONTESTANTS HAVE" "SIM SALA BIM." "HOPEFUL CONTESTANTS HAVE APPEARED BEFORE MY EYES." "HOPEFUL CONTESTANTS HAVE APPEARED BEFORE MY EYES." "YOU HAVE COME FROM FAR AND WIDE" "APPEARED BEFORE MY EYES." "YOU HAVE COME FROM FAR AND WIDE TO SHOW YOUR SKILLS, YOUR" "YOU HAVE COME FROM FAR AND WIDE TO SHOW YOUR SKILLS, YOUR SLEIGHTS, YOUR SHOWMANSHIP." "TO SHOW YOUR SKILLS, YOUR SLEIGHTS, YOUR SHOWMANSHIP." "IKNOWI'MLATE,BUTI HAVEA" "SLEIGHTS, YOUR SHOWMANSHIP." "IKNOWI'MLATE,BUTI HAVEA  GOOD EXCUSE." "IKNOWI'MLATE,BUTI HAVEA  GOOD EXCUSE." "I WANTED TO MAKE A BIG ENTRANCE" "GOOD EXCUSE." "I WANTED TO MAKE A BIG ENTRANCE TO MESS WITH EVERYONE'S MIND." "I WANTED TO MAKE A BIG ENTRANCE TO MESS WITH EVERYONE'S MIND." "ANDSOMETO SHOWTHEIRLACK" "TO MESS WITH EVERYONE'S MIND." "ANDSOMETO SHOWTHEIRLACK  OF PROFESSIONALISM." "ANDSOMETO SHOWTHEIRLACK  OF PROFESSIONALISM." "THE CONTEST TOMORROW WILL BE" "OF PROFESSIONALISM." "THE CONTEST TOMORROW WILL BE RIGHT HERE, AT THE MAGISH INN." "THE CONTEST TOMORROW WILL BE RIGHT HERE, AT THE MAGISH INN." "EIGHT MINUTES WILL BE THE LIMIT." "RIGHT HERE, AT THE MAGISH INN." "EIGHT MINUTES WILL BE THE LIMIT." "DO NOT EXCEED." "EIGHT MINUTES WILL BE THE LIMIT." "DO NOT EXCEED." "NOW, ANY QUESTIONS?" "DO NOT EXCEED." "NOW, ANY QUESTIONS?" "YEAH,I 'MTHERAVEN,AND I" "NOW, ANY QUESTIONS?" "YEAH,I 'MTHERAVEN,AND I NEED A SOUND CHECK BEFORE THE" "YEAH,I 'MTHERAVEN,AND I NEED A SOUND CHECK BEFORE THE CONTEST BECAUSE I PLAY MY MUSIC" "NEED A SOUND CHECK BEFORE THE CONTEST BECAUSE I PLAY MY MUSIC REALLY LOUD." "CONTEST BECAUSE I PLAY MY MUSIC REALLY LOUD." "[ JASON LAUGHS ]" "REALLY LOUD." "[ JASON LAUGHS ] TODAYWILLTRANSFORMINTO" "[ JASON LAUGHS ] TODAYWILLTRANSFORMINTO TOMORROW." "TODAYWILLTRANSFORMINTO TOMORROW." "BEST BE ON YOUR WAY." "TOMORROW." "BEST BE ON YOUR WAY." "RUNAWAY, LITTLE RABBITS." "BEST BE ON YOUR WAY." "RUNAWAY, LITTLE RABBITS." "WAITA MINUTE." "RUNAWAY, LITTLE RABBITS." "WAITA MINUTE." "WHAT ABOUT MY SOUND CHECK?" "WAITA MINUTE." "WHAT ABOUT MY SOUND CHECK?" "IWANTTO SAYHELLOTOAN OLD" "WHAT ABOUT MY SOUND CHECK?" "IWANTTO SAYHELLOTOAN OLD FRIEND." "IWANTTO SAYHELLOTOAN OLD FRIEND." "OH,I WANTTO MEETHIM ." "FRIEND." "OH,I WANTTO MEETHIM ." "HI." "OH,I WANTTO MEETHIM ." "HI." "SO, YOU'RE COMPETING?" "HI." "SO, YOU'RE COMPETING?" "PERCEPTIVE." "SO, YOU'RE COMPETING?" "PERCEPTIVE." "THIS MUST BE YOUR ASSISTANT." "PERCEPTIVE." "THIS MUST BE YOUR ASSISTANT." "NO,SHE'SMY PARTNER." "THIS MUST BE YOUR ASSISTANT." "NO,SHE'SMY PARTNER." "I'MANACTRESS." "NO,SHE'SMY PARTNER." "I'MANACTRESS." "DO YOU KNOW THEY HAVE A" "I'MANACTRESS." "DO YOU KNOW THEY HAVE A SPOUSES' EVENT?" "DO YOU KNOW THEY HAVE A SPOUSES' EVENT?" "I HEAR IT USED TO BE CALLED THE" "SPOUSES' EVENT?" "I HEAR IT USED TO BE CALLED THE LADIES' EVENT." "I HEAR IT USED TO BE CALLED THE LADIES' EVENT." "IT'S PROBABLY SOME TUPPERWARE" "LADIES' EVENT." "IT'S PROBABLY SOME TUPPERWARE PARTY." "IT'S PROBABLY SOME TUPPERWARE PARTY." "I MEAN, WHAT IF YOU BROUGHT YOUR" "PARTY." "I MEAN, WHAT IF YOU BROUGHT YOUR SPOUSE?" "I MEAN, WHAT IF YOU BROUGHT YOUR SPOUSE?" "DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?" "SPOUSE?" "DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?" "NO." "DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?" "NO." "OH." "NO." "OH." "WELL, IF YOU HAVE A THING FOR" "OH." "WELL, IF YOU HAVE A THING FOR MAGICIANS, THEN YOU'VE COME TO" "WELL, IF YOU HAVE A THING FOR MAGICIANS, THEN YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE." "MAGICIANS, THEN YOU'VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE." "I ALREADY NABBED THIS ONE." "THE RIGHT PLACE." "I ALREADY NABBED THIS ONE." "[ LAUGHS ]" "I ALREADY NABBED THIS ONE." "[ LAUGHS ] OH." "CONGRATULATIONS." "[ LAUGHS ] OH." "CONGRATULATIONS." "THANKS." "OH." "CONGRATULATIONS." "THANKS." "BUT IF YOU DID HAVE A BOYFRIEND," "THANKS." "BUT IF YOU DID HAVE A BOYFRIEND, HE WOULDN'T WANT TO GO TO SOME" "BUT IF YOU DID HAVE A BOYFRIEND, HE WOULDN'T WANT TO GO TO SOME TUPPERWARE PARTY, ANYWAY, WOULD" "HE WOULDN'T WANT TO GO TO SOME TUPPERWARE PARTY, ANYWAY, WOULD HE?" "TUPPERWARE PARTY, ANYWAY, WOULD HE?" "[ LAUGHS ]" "WE'RENOTDONEYET ." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] YIKES!" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] YIKES!" "I'M RUNNING OUT OF ARMS." "HEY!" "ARE YOU " " ARE YOU READY?" "WHEN ARE YOU UP?" "ARE YOU " " ARE YOU READY?" "WHEN ARE YOU UP?" "IN,LIKE,FIVEMINUTES,AND" "WHEN ARE YOU UP?" "IN,LIKE,FIVEMINUTES,AND SHE'S NOT HERE." "IN,LIKE,FIVEMINUTES,AND SHE'S NOT HERE." "WHEREISSHE?" "SHE'S NOT HERE." "WHEREISSHE?" "IDON'TKNOW." "WHEREISSHE?" "IDON'TKNOW." "SHE WAS ON HER CELLPHONE DOING" "IDON'TKNOW." "SHE WAS ON HER CELLPHONE DOING FACEBOOK STUFF." "SHE WAS ON HER CELLPHONE DOING FACEBOOK STUFF." "SHE SAID SHE'D BE RIGHT OVER," "FACEBOOK STUFF." "SHE SAID SHE'D BE RIGHT OVER, BUT NOW SHE'S NOT ANSWERING HER" "SHE SAID SHE'D BE RIGHT OVER, BUT NOW SHE'S NOT ANSWERING HER PHONE." "BUT NOW SHE'S NOT ANSWERING HER PHONE." "I'M GONNA RUN BACK TO THE HOTEL." "PHONE." "I'M GONNA RUN BACK TO THE HOTEL." "NO,YOU'LLNEVERMAKEIT." "I'M GONNA RUN BACK TO THE HOTEL." "NO,YOU'LLNEVERMAKEIT." "OH,CRAP!" "NO,YOU'LLNEVERMAKEIT." "OH,CRAP!" "WHAT A DISASTER." "OH,CRAP!" "WHAT A DISASTER." "YOU PICKED A GREAT TIME TO BREAK" "WHAT A DISASTER." "YOU PICKED A GREAT TIME TO BREAK UP WITH HER." "YOU PICKED A GREAT TIME TO BREAK UP WITH HER." "GOODMORNING." "UP WITH HER." "GOODMORNING." "READY TO MAKE A LITTLE MAGIC?" "GOODMORNING." "READY TO MAKE A LITTLE MAGIC?" "MMM." "READY TO MAKE A LITTLE MAGIC?" "MMM." "WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN?" "MMM." "WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN?" "WELL,I GOTALITTLEBIT" "WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN?" "WELL,I GOTALITTLEBIT NERVOUS, SO I DID A POLL ON" "WELL,I GOTALITTLEBIT NERVOUS, SO I DID A POLL ON FACEBOOK TO SEE IF I SHOULD DO" "NERVOUS, SO I DID A POLL ON FACEBOOK TO SEE IF I SHOULD DO THE ACT." "FACEBOOK TO SEE IF I SHOULD DO THE ACT." ""GO FOR IT" WON BY A LANDSLIDE." "THE ACT." ""GO FOR IT" WON BY A LANDSLIDE." "WE'REUPNEXT." ""GO FOR IT" WON BY A LANDSLIDE." "WE'REUPNEXT." "WE'RE ON IN, LIKE, FOUR MINUTES." "WE'REUPNEXT." "WE'RE ON IN, LIKE, FOUR MINUTES." "GREAT." "DOIHAVETIME TOPEE?" "WE'RE ON IN, LIKE, FOUR MINUTES." "GREAT." "DOIHAVETIME TOPEE?" "NO!" "GREAT." "DOIHAVETIME TOPEE?" "NO!" "AREYOUALWAYSTHIS" "NO!" "AREYOUALWAYSTHIS HIGH-STRUNG?" "AREYOUALWAYSTHIS HIGH-STRUNG?" "YEAH." "HIGH-STRUNG?" "YEAH." "I'MNOTTALKINGTOYOU." "YEAH." "I'MNOTTALKINGTOYOU." "YOUR WORDS ARE INVISIBLE TO ME." "I'MNOTTALKINGTOYOU." "YOUR WORDS ARE INVISIBLE TO ME." "I GOT TO PEE." "YOUR WORDS ARE INVISIBLE TO ME." "I GOT TO PEE." "I'LL BE RIGHT BACK." "I GOT TO PEE." "I'LL BE RIGHT BACK." "WHATWASTHAT?" "I'LL BE RIGHT BACK." "WHATWASTHAT?" "WHAT?" "WHATWASTHAT?" "WHAT?" "THATKISS." "WHAT?" "THATKISS." "SHEWASUPSETBECAUSEOFYOU," "THATKISS." "SHEWASUPSETBECAUSEOFYOU, AND WE SORT OF HOOKED UP." "SHEWASUPSETBECAUSEOFYOU, AND WE SORT OF HOOKED UP." "NOW WE'RE SORT OF DATING." "AND WE SORT OF HOOKED UP." "NOW WE'RE SORT OF DATING." "WHAT?" "!" "NOW WE'RE SORT OF DATING." "WHAT?" "!" "ITJUSTHAPPENED,AND ICAN'T" "WHAT?" "!" "ITJUSTHAPPENED,AND ICAN'T REALLY GET OUT OF IT." "ITJUSTHAPPENED,AND ICAN'T REALLY GET OUT OF IT." "SHEISSO ANNOYING." "REALLY GET OUT OF IT." "SHEISSO ANNOYING." "LOOK." "I KNOW." "SHEISSO ANNOYING." "LOOK." "I KNOW." "BUT I CAN'T HAVE HER GET ALL" "LOOK." "I KNOW." "BUT I CAN'T HAVE HER GET ALL CRAZY ON ME, YOU KNOW?" "BUT I CAN'T HAVE HER GET ALL CRAZY ON ME, YOU KNOW?" "I NEED TO KEEP HER BALANCED." "CRAZY ON ME, YOU KNOW?" "I NEED TO KEEP HER BALANCED." "OH,SOYOU'REUSINGHER." "I NEED TO KEEP HER BALANCED." "OH,SOYOU'REUSINGHER." "WOW!" "OH,SOYOU'REUSINGHER." "WOW!" "WHAT?" "WOW!" "WHAT?" "IDON'TTHINKYOU 'VEEVER" "WHAT?" "IDON'TTHINKYOU 'VEEVER TREATED A GIRL THIS BADLY IN" "IDON'TTHINKYOU 'VEEVER TREATED A GIRL THIS BADLY IN YOUR LIFE." "TREATED A GIRL THIS BADLY IN YOUR LIFE." "OH,COMEON ." "YOUR LIFE." "OH,COMEON ." "WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE?" "OH,COMEON ." "WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE?" "IF I REJECTED HER LIKE YOU DID," "WHAT WOULD YOU HAVE DONE?" "IF I REJECTED HER LIKE YOU DID, SHE NEVER WOULD HAVE STAYED TO" "IF I REJECTED HER LIKE YOU DID, SHE NEVER WOULD HAVE STAYED TO DO THE CONTEST." "SHE NEVER WOULD HAVE STAYED TO DO THE CONTEST." "THEPUPILHASBECOMETHE" "DO THE CONTEST." "THEPUPILHASBECOMETHE MASTER." "THEPUPILHASBECOMETHE MASTER." "THEPUPIL." "MASTER." "THEPUPIL." "I WAS NEVER YOUR PUPIL." "THEPUPIL." "I WAS NEVER YOUR PUPIL." "[CHUCKLES]" "I WAS NEVER YOUR PUPIL." "[CHUCKLES] SURE." "[CHUCKLES] SURE." "NEXTUP,WE HAVEJASONKANT" "SURE." "NEXTUP,WE HAVEJASONKANT  AND ELLEN TAYLOR." "NEXTUP,WE HAVEJASONKANT  AND ELLEN TAYLOR." "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ]" "GOODMORNING,LADIESAND  GENTLEMEN." "MY NAME IS JASON KANT, AND THIS" "GENTLEMEN." "MY NAME IS JASON KANT, AND THIS IS MY LOVELY ASSISTANT, ELLEN." "MY NAME IS JASON KANT, AND THIS IS MY LOVELY ASSISTANT, ELLEN." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "IS MY LOVELY ASSISTANT, ELLEN." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] YOU FORGOT THE TRAY." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] YOU FORGOT THE TRAY." "[ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ]" "YOU FORGOT THE TRAY." "[ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ] UM, TODAY, I WILL BE PERFORMING" "[ LAUGHS NERVOUSLY ] UM, TODAY, I WILL BE PERFORMING THE WORLD PREMIERE OF A" "UM, TODAY, I WILL BE PERFORMING THE WORLD PREMIERE OF A BRAND-NEW ILLUSION, THE FLOATING" "THE WORLD PREMIERE OF A BRAND-NEW ILLUSION, THE FLOATING WATCH." "BRAND-NEW ILLUSION, THE FLOATING WATCH." "SIR, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" "WATCH." "SIR, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" "GEORGE." "SIR, WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" "GEORGE." "HEY,GEORGE,DO YOUMINDIFI" "GEORGE." "HEY,GEORGE,DO YOUMINDIFI BORROW YOUR WATCH?" "HEY,GEORGE,DO YOUMINDIFI BORROW YOUR WATCH?" "YEAH,SURE." "BORROW YOUR WATCH?" "YEAH,SURE." "DON'TWORRY." "YEAH,SURE." "DON'TWORRY." "NO HARM WILL COME TO IT." "THANKS." "CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST GAVE IT TO ME." "CAN'T BELIEVE YOU JUST GAVE IT TO ME." "[ LAUGHS ]" "TO ME." "[ LAUGHS ] THAT WAS TOO EASY." "[ LAUGHS ] THAT WAS TOO EASY." "HEY, GEORGE, CAN I BORROW YOUR" "THAT WAS TOO EASY." "HEY, GEORGE, CAN I BORROW YOUR CREDIT CARDS, TOO?" "HEY, GEORGE, CAN I BORROW YOUR CREDIT CARDS, TOO?" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "CREDIT CARDS, TOO?" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] WHERE'S THE BAG?" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] WHERE'S THE BAG?" "IDON'THAVEABAG." "WHERE'S THE BAG?" "IDON'THAVEABAG." "CANYOU..." "GETTHEBAG ?" "IDON'THAVEABAG." "CANYOU..." "GETTHEBAG ?" "WHICHBAG?" "CANYOU..." "GETTHEBAG ?" "WHICHBAG?" "THEMAGICBAG." "WHICHBAG?" "THEMAGICBAG." "OH,THEMAGICBAG ." "THEMAGICBAG." "OH,THEMAGICBAG ." "YES." "CANYOUGET IT?" "OH,THEMAGICBAG ." "YES." "CANYOUGET IT?" "YES,I 'LLGETYOURMAGICBAG!" "YES." "CANYOUGET IT?" "YES,I 'LLGETYOURMAGICBAG!" "HERE'SHOWTHEILLUSIONWILL" "YES,I 'LLGETYOURMAGICBAG!" "HERE'SHOWTHEILLUSIONWILL  WORK." "HERE'SHOWTHEILLUSIONWILL  WORK." "GEORGE'S WATCH WILL FLOAT" "WORK." "GEORGE'S WATCH WILL FLOAT 10 FEET UP IN THE AIR, AROUND" "GEORGE'S WATCH WILL FLOAT 10 FEET UP IN THE AIR, AROUND THE ENTIRE AUDIENCE, OVER YOUR 10 FEET UP IN THE AIR, AROUND THE ENTIRE AUDIENCE, OVER YOUR HEADS, AND BACK INTO MY WAITING" "THE ENTIRE AUDIENCE, OVER YOUR HEADS, AND BACK INTO MY WAITING HANDS." "HEADS, AND BACK INTO MY WAITING HANDS." "HERE'STHEMAGICBAG ," "HANDS." "HERE'STHEMAGICBAG , YOUR LORDSHIP." "HERE'STHEMAGICBAG , YOUR LORDSHIP." "THANKYOU." "YOUR LORDSHIP." "THANKYOU." "YEAH." "THANKYOU." "YEAH." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "YEAH." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] NOW,TOPROVETHATTHEWATCH" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] NOW,TOPROVETHATTHEWATCH  IS NOT CONNECTED TO ANY WIRES OR" "NOW,TOPROVETHATTHEWATCH  IS NOT CONNECTED TO ANY WIRES OR THREADS, I WILL PLACE IT INSIDE" "IS NOT CONNECTED TO ANY WIRES OR THREADS, I WILL PLACE IT INSIDE OF THIS PAPER BAG." "THREADS, I WILL PLACE IT INSIDE OF THIS PAPER BAG." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "OF THIS PAPER BAG." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "I'MFILINGMY NAILS." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "I'MFILINGMY NAILS." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "I'MFILINGMY NAILS." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] DOYOUHAVETODOTHATNOW?" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] DOYOUHAVETODOTHATNOW?" "CANYOUTHINKOFA BETTER" "DOYOUHAVETODOTHATNOW?" "CANYOUTHINKOFA BETTER TIME?" "CANYOUTHINKOFA BETTER TIME?" "NO,I GUESSNOT." "TIME?" "NO,I GUESSNOT." "CAN YOU HOLD THE BAG?" "NO,I GUESSNOT." "CAN YOU HOLD THE BAG?" "Oh,myGod!" "CAN YOU HOLD THE BAG?" "Oh,myGod!" "[ SIGHS ]" "Oh,myGod!" "[ SIGHS ] HERE'SWHATINEEDEVERYONE" "[ SIGHS ] HERE'SWHATINEEDEVERYONE TO DO." "HERE'SWHATINEEDEVERYONE TO DO." "I NEED EVERYONE TO FOCUS YOUR" "TO DO." "I NEED EVERYONE TO FOCUS YOUR ENERGIES ONTO GEORGE'S WATCH." "I NEED EVERYONE TO FOCUS YOUR ENERGIES ONTO GEORGE'S WATCH." "THINK VERY LIGHT, AIRY THOUGHTS," "ENERGIES ONTO GEORGE'S WATCH." "THINK VERY LIGHT, AIRY THOUGHTS, LIKE A FEATHER." "THINK VERY LIGHT, AIRY THOUGHTS, LIKE A FEATHER." "THINK VERY " "LIKE A FEATHER." "THINK VERY -- THINK VERY LIGHT, AIRY THOUGHTS," "THINK VERY -- THINK VERY LIGHT, AIRY THOUGHTS, LIKE A FEATHER, FLOATING CALMLY," "THINK VERY LIGHT, AIRY THOUGHTS, LIKE A FEATHER, FLOATING CALMLY, SOFTLY IN THE WIND." "LIKE A FEATHER, FLOATING CALMLY, SOFTLY IN THE WIND." "CALMLY, IN THE WIND." "SOFTLY IN THE WIND." "CALMLY, IN THE WIND." "ELLEN, WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO SIT" "CALMLY, IN THE WIND." "ELLEN, WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO SIT DOWN?" "ELLEN, WHY DON'T YOU JUST GO SIT DOWN?" "OKAY, BABE?" "DOWN?" "OKAY, BABE?" "CALMLY, IN THE WIND, LIKE A" "OKAY, BABE?" "CALMLY, IN THE WIND, LIKE A FEATHER." "CALMLY, IN THE WIND, LIKE A FEATHER." "WE'LL NEED ABSOLUTE SILENCE." "FEATHER." "WE'LL NEED ABSOLUTE SILENCE." "STOP IT!" "WE'LL NEED ABSOLUTE SILENCE." "STOP IT!" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "!" "STOP IT!" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "!" "IDON'TCARE!" "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "!" "IDON'TCARE!" "YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT OUR" "IDON'TCARE!" "YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP AT ALL!" "YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP AT ALL!" "ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOUR" "RELATIONSHIP AT ALL!" "ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOUR STUPID MAGIC TRICKS!" "ALL YOU CARE ABOUT IS YOUR STUPID MAGIC TRICKS!" "[ CRYING ]" "STUPID MAGIC TRICKS!" "[ CRYING ] UH..." "[ CRYING ] UH..." "GEORGE?" "UH..." "GEORGE?" "UM..." "GEORGE?" "UM..." "I DON'T " " I DON'T THINK I'M" "UM..." "I DON'T " " I DON'T THINK I'M GONNA BE ABLE TO FLOAT YOUR" "I DON'T " " I DON'T THINK I'M GONNA BE ABLE TO FLOAT YOUR WATCH." "GONNA BE ABLE TO FLOAT YOUR WATCH." "[ ELLEN WAILING ]" "WATCH." "[ ELLEN WAILING ] UM..." "HERE, LET'S SEE." "[ ELLEN WAILING ] UM..." "HERE, LET'S SEE." "I'LL DO ANOTHER TRICK." "UM..." "HERE, LET'S SEE." "I'LL DO ANOTHER TRICK." "NO." "I'LL DO ANOTHER TRICK." "NO." "UH..." "NO." "UH..." "[ DUCK SQUEAKS ]" "UH..." "[ DUCK SQUEAKS ] HERE, CARD TRICK." "[ DUCK SQUEAKS ] HERE, CARD TRICK." "THEY'RE ALL DIFFERENT." "HERE, CARD TRICK." "THEY'RE ALL DIFFERENT." "I'LL BRING CARDS A LITTLE BIT TO" "THEY'RE ALL DIFFERENT." "I'LL BRING CARDS A LITTLE BIT TO THE BOTTOM OF THE DECK A LITTLE" "I'LL BRING CARDS A LITTLE BIT TO THE BOTTOM OF THE DECK A LITTLE BIT AT A TIME." "THE BOTTOM OF THE DECK A LITTLE BIT AT A TIME." "ANYTIME YOU WANT, YOU JUST SAY," "BIT AT A TIME." "ANYTIME YOU WANT, YOU JUST SAY, "STOP."" "ANYTIME YOU WANT, YOU JUST SAY, "STOP." STOP." ""STOP." STOP." "OKAY,RIGHTTHERE." "STOP." "OKAY,RIGHTTHERE." "THIS IS GEORGE'S CARD." "OKAY,RIGHTTHERE." "THIS IS GEORGE'S CARD." "EVERYONE REMEMBER GEORGE'S CARD." "THIS IS GEORGE'S CARD." "EVERYONE REMEMBER GEORGE'S CARD." "OKAY?" "EVERYONE REMEMBER GEORGE'S CARD." "OKAY?" "GEORGE'S CARD." "OKAY?" "GEORGE'S CARD." "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?" "GEORGE'S CARD." "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?" "I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA HOW WE" "HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?" "I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA HOW WE MIGHT BE ABLE " " WHOA!" "I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA HOW WE MIGHT BE ABLE " " WHOA!" "I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA HOW WE" "MIGHT BE ABLE " " WHOA!" "I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA HOW WE MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIX GEORGE'S" "I THINK I HAVE AN IDEA HOW WE MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIX GEORGE'S WATCH." "MIGHT BE ABLE TO FIX GEORGE'S WATCH." "I'M NOT SURE IF I REMEMBER" "WATCH." "I'M NOT SURE IF I REMEMBER EXACTLY HOW TO DO THIS, BUT I" "I'M NOT SURE IF I REMEMBER EXACTLY HOW TO DO THIS, BUT I THINK THAT IF I PUT THE WATCH" "EXACTLY HOW TO DO THIS, BUT I THINK THAT IF I PUT THE WATCH PIECES INTO THE BAG, WE MAY BE" "THINK THAT IF I PUT THE WATCH PIECES INTO THE BAG, WE MAY BE ABLE TO FIND GEORGE'S CARD AND" "PIECES INTO THE BAG, WE MAY BE ABLE TO FIND GEORGE'S CARD AND RESTORE HIS WATCH." "ABLE TO FIND GEORGE'S CARD AND RESTORE HIS WATCH." "IWANTTO TALK." "RESTORE HIS WATCH." "IWANTTO TALK." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "IWANTTO TALK." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] RIGHTNOW?" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] RIGHTNOW?" "YES." "RIGHTNOW?" "YES." "CAN'TITWAIT?" "YES." "CAN'TITWAIT?" "NO,ITCAN'TWAIT." "CAN'TITWAIT?" "NO,ITCAN'TWAIT." "WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU, ME" "NO,ITCAN'TWAIT." "WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU, ME OR THIS ACT?" "WHAT'S MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU, ME OR THIS ACT?" "YOU." "OR THIS ACT?" "YOU." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "YOU." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] OKAY,SO,IWANTSOME" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] OKAY,SO,IWANTSOME  CHANGES, OR I'M LEAVING." "OKAY,SO,IWANTSOME  CHANGES, OR I'M LEAVING." "OKAY." "WHATCHANGES?" "CHANGES, OR I'M LEAVING." "OKAY." "WHATCHANGES?" "FIRSTOFALL,I'M TIREDOF" "OKAY." "WHATCHANGES?" "FIRSTOFALL,I'M TIREDOF GOING, "OOH" AND "AHH" WHILE YOU" "FIRSTOFALL,I'M TIREDOF GOING, "OOH" AND "AHH" WHILE YOU DO YOUR TRICKS." "GOING, "OOH" AND "AHH" WHILE YOU DO YOUR TRICKS." "I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A PORNO" "DO YOUR TRICKS." "I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A PORNO MOVIE." "I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A PORNO MOVIE." "OKAY." "MOVIE." "OKAY." "ANDI DON'TWANTTOBEYOUR" "OKAY." "ANDI DON'TWANTTOBEYOUR SLAVE." "ANDI DON'TWANTTOBEYOUR SLAVE." "I WALK AROUND CARRYING YOUR" "SLAVE." "I WALK AROUND CARRYING YOUR PROPS ALL DAY LONG." "I WALK AROUND CARRYING YOUR PROPS ALL DAY LONG." "FROM NOW ON, I WANT US TO DO THE" "PROPS ALL DAY LONG." "FROM NOW ON, I WANT US TO DO THE TRICKS TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL." "FROM NOW ON, I WANT US TO DO THE TRICKS TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL." "TOGETHER?" "TRICKS TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL." "TOGETHER?" "YES." "TOGETHER?" "YES." "A PARTNERSHIP." "YES." "A PARTNERSHIP." "WELL,OKAY,WE COULDTRY" "A PARTNERSHIP." "WELL,OKAY,WE COULDTRY  THAT." "WELL,OKAY,WE COULDTRY  THAT." "REALLY?" "THAT." "REALLY?" "SURE." "REALLY?" "SURE." "ILOVEYOU." "SURE." "ILOVEYOU." "ILOVEYOU,TOO ." "ILOVEYOU." "ILOVEYOU,TOO ." "OKAY,GEORGE,JASONAND IARE" "ILOVEYOU,TOO ." "OKAY,GEORGE,JASONAND IARE GONNA TRY TO FINISH THIS TRICK" "OKAY,GEORGE,JASONAND IARE GONNA TRY TO FINISH THIS TRICK TOGETHER." "GONNA TRY TO FINISH THIS TRICK TOGETHER." "READY?" "TOGETHER." "READY?" "READY." "READY?" "READY." "AND WITH THAT MAGICAL KISS," "READY." "AND WITH THAT MAGICAL KISS, LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENED." "AND WITH THAT MAGICAL KISS, LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENED." "OH,GOD." "LET'S SEE WHAT HAPPENED." "OH,GOD." "OKAY, THERE'S DEFINITELY A CARD" "OH,GOD." "OKAY, THERE'S DEFINITELY A CARD IN HERE." "OKAY, THERE'S DEFINITELY A CARD IN HERE." "IT'S THE 2 OF DIAMONDS." "IN HERE." "IT'S THE 2 OF DIAMONDS." "IS THAT YOUR CARD, GEORGE?" "IT'S THE 2 OF DIAMONDS." "IS THAT YOUR CARD, GEORGE?" "YEAH." "IS THAT YOUR CARD, GEORGE?" "YEAH." "GREAT!" "YEAH." "GREAT!" "BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, THERE'S NO" "GREAT!" "BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, THERE'S NO WATCH." "BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, THERE'S NO WATCH." "WELL, WE FOUND YOUR CARD, AND" "WATCH." "WELL, WE FOUND YOUR CARD, AND THAT WAS A PRETTY GOOD TRICK." "WELL, WE FOUND YOUR CARD, AND THAT WAS A PRETTY GOOD TRICK." "YEAH!" "THAT WAS A PRETTY GOOD TRICK." "YEAH!" "ANDELLENANDIHAVE MADE UP," "YEAH!" "ANDELLENANDIHAVE MADE UP, AND THAT'S WHAT'S REALLY" "ANDELLENANDIHAVE MADE UP, AND THAT'S WHAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT." "AND THAT'S WHAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT." "OH,MYGOSH!" "IMPORTANT." "OH,MYGOSH!" "ELLEN,WHAT" " WHATISTHIS" "OH,MYGOSH!" "ELLEN,WHAT" " WHATISTHIS  ON YOUR LEG?" "!" "ELLEN,WHAT" " WHATISTHIS  ON YOUR LEG?" "!" "IT'S A WATCH!" "ON YOUR LEG?" "!" "IT'S A WATCH!" "IT'S GEORGE'S WATCH!" "IT'S A WATCH!" "IT'S GEORGE'S WATCH!" "GEORGE?" "IT'S GEORGE'S WATCH!" "GEORGE?" "GEORGE,YOUWANTTOCOME GET" "GEORGE?" "GEORGE,YOUWANTTOCOME GET YOUR WATCH?" "GEORGE,YOUWANTTOCOME GET YOUR WATCH?" "HEY,WATCHIT ,BUDDY." "YOUR WATCH?" "HEY,WATCHIT ,BUDDY." "THERE YOU GO." "HEY,WATCHIT ,BUDDY." "THERE YOU GO." "THANK YOU VERY MUCH." "THERE YOU GO." "THANK YOU VERY MUCH." "THANKYOU!" "THANK YOU VERY MUCH." "THANKYOU!" "THANKS." "WEWEREFUNNY,RIGHT?" "YOUWEREGREAT." "I SWEAR." "YOUWEREGREAT." "I SWEAR." "WHEN YOU STOMPED ON THE WATCH," "I SWEAR." "WHEN YOU STOMPED ON THE WATCH, SOME OF THEM THOUGHT IT WAS" "WHEN YOU STOMPED ON THE WATCH, SOME OF THEM THOUGHT IT WAS REAL." "SOME OF THEM THOUGHT IT WAS REAL." "IKNOW!" "REAL." "IKNOW!" "THEY THOUGHT IT WAS REAL!" "IKNOW!" "THEY THOUGHT IT WAS REAL!" "HEY!" "THEY THOUGHT IT WAS REAL!" "HEY!" "IMESSEDUP ONEJOKE." "HEY!" "IMESSEDUP ONEJOKE." "NO,IT'SOKAY." "IMESSEDUP ONEJOKE." "NO,IT'SOKAY." "NOBODY NOTICED." "NO,IT'SOKAY." "NOBODY NOTICED." "YOU WERE REALLY FUNNY." "NOBODY NOTICED." "YOU WERE REALLY FUNNY." "IWANTEDIT TO BE PERFECT." "YOU WERE REALLY FUNNY." "IWANTEDIT TO BE PERFECT." "HOW WAS THE WATCH TRICK?" "IWANTEDIT TO BE PERFECT." "HOW WAS THE WATCH TRICK?" "ITLOOKEDGOOD." "HOW WAS THE WATCH TRICK?" "ITLOOKEDGOOD." "IT LOOKED REALLY GOOD." "ITLOOKEDGOOD." "IT LOOKED REALLY GOOD." "YOUTHINKSO ?" "IT LOOKED REALLY GOOD." "YOUTHINKSO ?" "YOU DIDN'T SEE THE MOVE?" "YOUTHINKSO ?" "YOU DIDN'T SEE THE MOVE?" "NO,YOUACTUALLYFOOLEDME." "YOU DIDN'T SEE THE MOVE?" "NO,YOUACTUALLYFOOLEDME." "ITWASGREAT." "NO,YOUACTUALLYFOOLEDME." "ITWASGREAT." "IT WAS REALLY GREAT." "ITWASGREAT." "IT WAS REALLY GREAT." "I WISH I HAD KNOWN." "IT WAS REALLY GREAT." "I WISH I HAD KNOWN." "IT'S REALLY WONDERFUL." "I WISH I HAD KNOWN." "IT'S REALLY WONDERFUL." "YOU TOO!" "IT'S REALLY WONDERFUL." "YOU TOO!" "NICE JOB." "YOU TOO!" "NICE JOB." "OH." "NICE JOB." "OH." "SURPRISINGLY." "OH." "SURPRISINGLY." "THANKS." "SURPRISINGLY." "THANKS." "IGOTTO GETREADY." "THANKS." "IGOTTO GETREADY." "I'M ON IN AN HOUR." "IGOTTO GETREADY." "I'M ON IN AN HOUR." "WILL YOU COME WATCH?" "I'M ON IN AN HOUR." "WILL YOU COME WATCH?" "SURE." "ICAN'TTELLIFSHELIKES ME OR HATES ME." "ATLEASTSHEACKNOWLEDGED" "OR HATES ME." "ATLEASTSHEACKNOWLEDGED YOU." "ATLEASTSHEACKNOWLEDGED YOU." "SHE'SSTRESSED." "YOU." "SHE'SSTRESSED." "SHE HAS TO GET READY." "SHE'SSTRESSED." "SHE HAS TO GET READY." "WELL,I 'MGONNAGO TO THE" "SHE HAS TO GET READY." "WELL,I 'MGONNAGO TO THE ZOO." "WELL,I 'MGONNAGO TO THE ZOO." "REALLY?" "ZOO." "REALLY?" "YEAH,THESPOUSES'EVENTIS" "REALLY?" "YEAH,THESPOUSES'EVENTIS WAY COOLER THAN I THOUGHT." "YEAH,THESPOUSES'EVENTIS WAY COOLER THAN I THOUGHT." "I'M GONNA GO SEE SOME GIRAFFES." "WAY COOLER THAN I THOUGHT." "I'M GONNA GO SEE SOME GIRAFFES." "OH, BUT FIRST I HAVE TO SEE" "I'M GONNA GO SEE SOME GIRAFFES." "OH, BUT FIRST I HAVE TO SEE THE RAVEN." "OH, BUT FIRST I HAVE TO SEE THE RAVEN." "ISTHATPARTOFTHEBIRD" "THE RAVEN." "ISTHATPARTOFTHEBIRD SHOW?" "ISTHATPARTOFTHEBIRD SHOW?" "HE'SINTHECONTEST." "SHOW?" "HE'SINTHECONTEST." "HEFLOATSADRUMSETWHILE" "HE'SINTHECONTEST." "HEFLOATSADRUMSETWHILE  PLAYING THE DRUMS." "HEFLOATSADRUMSETWHILE  PLAYING THE DRUMS." "OH, MY GOD, HE'S UP." "PLAYING THE DRUMS." "OH, MY GOD, HE'S UP." "I'M GONNA GO WATCH." "OH, MY GOD, HE'S UP." "I'M GONNA GO WATCH." "...THERAVEN!" "I'M GONNA GO WATCH." "...THERAVEN!" "[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]" "[ WATER RUNNING ] I'MBACK." "WHEN DO YOU LEAVE FOR THE ZOO?" "YEAH,I 'MNOTREALLYINTO ZOOS." "HOWDIDYOU" "ISSHEGONE?" "ZOOS." "HOWDIDYOU" "ISSHEGONE?" "DIDN'TYOUCATCHIT?" "HOWDIDYOU" "ISSHEGONE?" "DIDN'TYOUCATCHIT?" "THOUGHT I WAS BEING TOTALLY" "DIDN'TYOUCATCHIT?" "THOUGHT I WAS BEING TOTALLY OBVIOUS." "THOUGHT I WAS BEING TOTALLY OBVIOUS." "SWIPED IT FROM ELLEN." "OBVIOUS." "SWIPED IT FROM ELLEN." "I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND." "SWIPED IT FROM ELLEN." "I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND." "THE HOTEL WAS FULL, SO I'M" "I HOPE YOU DON'T MIND." "THE HOTEL WAS FULL, SO I'M STAYING OUT IN THE BOONIES." "THE HOTEL WAS FULL, SO I'M STAYING OUT IN THE BOONIES." "THAT'SFINE." "STAYING OUT IN THE BOONIES." "THAT'SFINE." "DID THE ZOO TRIP ALREADY LEAVE?" "THAT'SFINE." "DID THE ZOO TRIP ALREADY LEAVE?" "[CHUCKLES]" "DID THE ZOO TRIP ALREADY LEAVE?" "[CHUCKLES] DON'T WORRY ABOUT HER." "[CHUCKLES] DON'T WORRY ABOUT HER." "IF SHE COMES BACK, WE'LL JUST" "DON'T WORRY ABOUT HER." "IF SHE COMES BACK, WE'LL JUST TELL HER THAT YOU WERE HELPING" "IF SHE COMES BACK, WE'LL JUST TELL HER THAT YOU WERE HELPING ME WITH MY ACT." "TELL HER THAT YOU WERE HELPING ME WITH MY ACT." "OKAY." "ME WITH MY ACT." "OKAY." "HERE." "OKAY." "HERE." "COULD YOU PUT THIS STUFF IN MY" "HERE." "COULD YOU PUT THIS STUFF IN MY HAIR?" "COULD YOU PUT THIS STUFF IN MY HAIR?" "JUST, YEAH." "HAIR?" "JUST, YEAH." "JUST PUT IT IN THERE." "JUST, YEAH." "JUST PUT IT IN THERE." "MESS IT ALL UP." "MAKE IT CRAZY." "JUST PUT IT IN THERE." "MESS IT ALL UP." "MAKE IT CRAZY." "IT'S FOR THE ACT." "GREAT." "OKAY." "GOT TO GO." "SEE YOU OVER THERE." "GOT TO GO." "SEE YOU OVER THERE." "[ DOOR OPENS ]" "SEE YOU OVER THERE." "[ DOOR OPENS ] THISSCREENHEREISFOROUR" "[ DOOR OPENS ] THISSCREENHEREISFOROUR NEXT PERFORMER, A FEMALE" "THISSCREENHEREISFOROUR NEXT PERFORMER, A FEMALE MAGICIAN." "NEXT PERFORMER, A FEMALE MAGICIAN." "STACY DIETZ." "MAGICIAN." "STACY DIETZ." "[ PIANO PLAYS MID-TEMPO TUNE]" "IALWAYSWANTEDTOBEA MAGICIAN, EVER SINCE I WAS A" "MAGICIAN, EVER SINCE I WAS A LITTLE GIRL." "LITTLE GIRL." "I USED TO SAW MY BARBIES IN HALF." "I USED TO SAW MY BARBIES IN HALF." "I DID TRADE SHOWS, COUNTY" "HALF." "I DID TRADE SHOWS, COUNTY FAIRS, AND ENDED UP IN VEGAS." "I DID TRADE SHOWS, COUNTY FAIRS, AND ENDED UP IN VEGAS." "THAT'S WHERE ALL THE GREAT" "FAIRS, AND ENDED UP IN VEGAS." "THAT'S WHERE ALL THE GREAT MAGICIANS GO." "THAT'S WHERE ALL THE GREAT MAGICIANS GO." "DAVID COPPERFIELD, CRIS ANGEL," "MAGICIANS GO." "DAVID COPPERFIELD, CRIS ANGEL, PENN  TELLER." "DAVID COPPERFIELD, CRIS ANGEL, PENN  TELLER." "I PICKED A CORNER, PASSED THE" "PENN  TELLER." "I PICKED A CORNER, PASSED THE HAT, AND WORKED FOR TIPS." "THEN, I MET NATHAN." "HE HAD HIS PICTURE ON THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING." "HE HAD HIS PICTURE ON THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING." "HE WAS VERY PROUD OF THAT." "HE SHOWERED ME WITH GIFTS AND HELPED ME GET HIGH-PAYING MAGIC JOBS." "HELPED ME GET HIGH-PAYING MAGIC JOBS." "HE EVEN LET ME BE A GUEST" "JOBS." "HE EVEN LET ME BE A GUEST PERFORMER IN HIS SHOW " "HE EVEN LET ME BE A GUEST PERFORMER IN HIS SHOW -- 8 MINUTES ON STAGE, ALL TO 8 MINUTES ON STAGE, ALL TO MYSELF." "MYSELF." "AND THEN HE PRODUCED MY OWN" "AND THEN HE PRODUCED MY OWN SHOW " " SEVEN SHOWS A WEEK," "SHOW " " SEVEN SHOWS A WEEK, PACKED HOUSES." "NATHAN WAS RIGHT THERE, SUPPORTING ME ON OPENING NIGHT." "I WAS FINALLY MAKING SOME MONEY" "SUPPORTING ME ON OPENING NIGHT." "I WAS FINALLY MAKING SOME MONEY AS A MAGICIAN " " REAL MONEY AND" "I WAS FINALLY MAKING SOME MONEY AS A MAGICIAN " " REAL MONEY AND LOTS OF IT." "AS A MAGICIAN " " REAL MONEY AND LOTS OF IT." "BUT NATHAN AND I..." "LOTS OF IT." "BUT NATHAN AND I..." "[ SIGHS]" "BUT NATHAN AND I..." "[ SIGHS] ...WE DIDN'T ALWAYS SEE" "[ SIGHS] ...WE DIDN'T ALWAYS SEE EYE TO EYE." "...WE DIDN'T ALWAYS SEE EYE TO EYE." "AND SOMETIMES I DON'T ALWAYS" "EYE TO EYE." "AND SOMETIMES I DON'T ALWAYS SAY THE RIGHT THING." "AND SOMETIMES I DON'T ALWAYS SAY THE RIGHT THING." "[ SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS]" "SO, HE ENDED THE SHOW..." "AND HE ENDED US." "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ]" "[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]" "THATWASAMAZING." "IT WAS REALLY POWERFUL." "THANKS." "IT WAS REALLY POWERFUL." "THANKS." "ITREALLYMADEASTATEMENT." "THANKS." "ITREALLYMADEASTATEMENT." "IT WAS ABOUT SOMETHING." "ITREALLYMADEASTATEMENT." "IT WAS ABOUT SOMETHING." "NOBODY DOES THAT." "IT WAS ABOUT SOMETHING." "NOBODY DOES THAT." "EXCEPTYOU." "NICEJOBYESTERDAY." "THANKS." "SOUND SYSTEM WAS A LOAD OF" "THANKS." "SOUND SYSTEM WAS A LOAD OF BOLLOCKS." "SOUND SYSTEM WAS A LOAD OF BOLLOCKS." "AHEM!" "BOLLOCKS." "AHEM!" "IT IS MY PLEASURE TO ANNOUNCE" "AHEM!" "IT IS MY PLEASURE TO ANNOUNCE THE SIX FINALISTS." "IT IS MY PLEASURE TO ANNOUNCE THE SIX FINALISTS." "AH" "THE SIX FINALISTS." "AH-- THEY WILL PERFORM AT THE" "AH-- THEY WILL PERFORM AT THE HISTORIC BALBOA THEATRE IN THE" "THEY WILL PERFORM AT THE HISTORIC BALBOA THEATRE IN THE GASLAMP DISTRICT TOMORROW NIGHT," "HISTORIC BALBOA THEATRE IN THE GASLAMP DISTRICT TOMORROW NIGHT, FRIDAY NIGHT, IN FRONT OF A" "GASLAMP DISTRICT TOMORROW NIGHT, FRIDAY NIGHT, IN FRONT OF A SOLD-OUT AUDIENCE." "FRIDAY NIGHT, IN FRONT OF A SOLD-OUT AUDIENCE." "THEY WILL ALSO RECEIVE A FREE" "SOLD-OUT AUDIENCE." "THEY WILL ALSO RECEIVE A FREE ONE-YEAR SUBSCRIPTION TO" "THEY WILL ALSO RECEIVE A FREE ONE-YEAR SUBSCRIPTION TO TOP HAT MAGAZINE, ELECTRONIC" "ONE-YEAR SUBSCRIPTION TO TOP HAT MAGAZINE, ELECTRONIC VERSION ONLY." "TOP HAT MAGAZINE, ELECTRONIC VERSION ONLY." "IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, THE SIX" "VERSION ONLY." "IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, THE SIX FINALISTS ARE STACY DIETZ." "IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER, THE SIX FINALISTS ARE STACY DIETZ." "Yes!" "FINALISTS ARE STACY DIETZ." "Yes!" "HMM." "Yes!" "HMM." "THE PALINDROMES." "HMM." "THE PALINDROMES." "LARRY MABLE AND JEN." "THE PALINDROMES." "LARRY MABLE AND JEN." "KRISTOFF BRAYTON." "LARRY MABLE AND JEN." "KRISTOFF BRAYTON." "CONJURING CONRAD." "KRISTOFF BRAYTON." "CONJURING CONRAD." "YEAH!" "CONJURING CONRAD." "YEAH!" "ANDEDDIEFOX." "YEAH!" "ANDEDDIEFOX." "EVERYONE ELSE, COME TRY AGAIN" "ANDEDDIEFOX." "EVERYONE ELSE, COME TRY AGAIN NEXT YEAR IN BALTIMORE." "EVERYONE ELSE, COME TRY AGAIN NEXT YEAR IN BALTIMORE." "CONGRATULATIONS." "NEXT YEAR IN BALTIMORE." "CONGRATULATIONS." "I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU." "CONGRATULATIONS." "I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU." "ITSHOULDHAVEBEENBOTH OF" "I'M REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU." "ITSHOULDHAVEBEENBOTH OF US." "ITSHOULDHAVEBEENBOTH OF US." "LET'SGO." "[ROARS] AAH!" "[SIGHS] I'M GONNA TAKE A WALK." "I'LLCOMEWITHYOU ." "I'M GONNA TAKE A WALK." "I'LLCOMEWITHYOU ." "IJUSTNEEDALITTLETIME" "I'LLCOMEWITHYOU ." "IJUSTNEEDALITTLETIME ALONE." "IJUSTNEEDALITTLETIME ALONE." "[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ]" "ALONE." "[ DOOR OPENS, CLOSES ] [ ELEVATOR DINGS ]" "YOUKNOW,IDIDN'TGETINTO THE FINALS, EITHER." "I WORKED HARD FOR THIS, TOO." "THE FINALS, EITHER." "I WORKED HARD FOR THIS, TOO." "IKNOW." "I WORKED HARD FOR THIS, TOO." "IKNOW." "I JUST NEED SOME TIME TO THINK." "IKNOW." "I JUST NEED SOME TIME TO THINK." "YOUCAN'TTHINKWITHME" "I JUST NEED SOME TIME TO THINK." "YOUCAN'TTHINKWITHME AROUND?" "!" "YOUCAN'TTHINKWITHME AROUND?" "!" "I'M TOO LOUD?" "!" "AROUND?" "!" "I'M TOO LOUD?" "!" "[ ELEVATOR DINGS ]" "[ SLIPPERS SQUEAKING ]" "[SIGHS] YOU'REMEETINGHER." "NO,I WASN'T." "YOU'REMEETINGHER." "NO,I WASN'T." "OH,COMEON !" "NO,I WASN'T." "OH,COMEON !" "I'M NOT STUPID." "GO." "GO OVER TO HER." "I COULD USE A DRINK, TOO." "GO OVER TO HER." "I COULD USE A DRINK, TOO." "SHE PROBABLY SLEPT WITH HALF THE" "I COULD USE A DRINK, TOO." "SHE PROBABLY SLEPT WITH HALF THE JUDGES." "SHE PROBABLY SLEPT WITH HALF THE JUDGES." "PLEASE." "JUDGES." "PLEASE." "JUST GO BACK UP TO THE ROOM." "PLEASE." "JUST GO BACK UP TO THE ROOM." "YOU'RE REALLY BEING ANNOYING." "JUST GO BACK UP TO THE ROOM." "YOU'RE REALLY BEING ANNOYING." "AAH!" "YOU'RE REALLY BEING ANNOYING." "AAH!" "[ SLIPPERS SQUEAKING ]" "I'M TOO OLD TO START A BRAND-NEW CAREER." "STARVING ARTIST " " AM I KIDDING" "CAREER." "STARVING ARTIST " " AM I KIDDING MYSELF?" "STARVING ARTIST " " AM I KIDDING MYSELF?" "I CLEARLY DON'T HAVE THE DRIVE" "MYSELF?" "I CLEARLY DON'T HAVE THE DRIVE THAT YOU HAVE, THAT STEVE HAS." "I CLEARLY DON'T HAVE THE DRIVE THAT YOU HAVE, THAT STEVE HAS." "I'M GOING BACK TO SOFTWARE." "THAT YOU HAVE, THAT STEVE HAS." "I'M GOING BACK TO SOFTWARE." "IHAVEASURPRISEFORYOU." "I'M GOING BACK TO SOFTWARE." "IHAVEASURPRISEFORYOU." "REALLY?" "IHAVEASURPRISEFORYOU." "REALLY?" "MM-HMM." "CARD TRICK." "INDEX CARDS, EACH WITH A NAME OF ONE OF THE CONTESTANTS." "INDEX CARDS, EACH WITH A NAME OF ONE OF THE CONTESTANTS." "YOUWANTME TO PICKONE ?" "ONE OF THE CONTESTANTS." "YOUWANTME TO PICKONE ?" "SPRINGTHEMIN THEAIR ." "DO IT." "[LAUGHS] ISPEAREDYOU." "[LAUGHS] ISPEAREDYOU." "THE OTHER ONE'S MINE." "ISPEAREDYOU." "THE OTHER ONE'S MINE." "WHATARETHESE?" "THE OTHER ONE'S MINE." "WHATARETHESE?" "SCORECARDSFROMTHECONTEST." "WHATARETHESE?" "SCORECARDSFROMTHECONTEST." "HOWDIDYOUGET THESE?" "SCORECARDSFROMTHECONTEST." "HOWDIDYOUGET THESE?" "DON'TYOUWANTTOSEEHOWYOU" "HOWDIDYOUGET THESE?" "DON'TYOUWANTTOSEEHOWYOU DID?" "DON'TYOUWANTTOSEEHOWYOU DID?" "WE'RENOTSUPPOSEDTOSEE" "DID?" "WE'RENOTSUPPOSEDTOSEE THESE." "WE'RENOTSUPPOSEDTOSEE THESE." "IWANTEDTO DO SOMETHINGNICE" "THESE." "IWANTEDTO DO SOMETHINGNICE FOR YOU." "IWANTEDTO DO SOMETHINGNICE FOR YOU." "DON'TDRAGME INTOTHIS." "FOR YOU." "DON'TDRAGME INTOTHIS." "IF WE GET CAUGHT, I'LL NEVER BE" "DON'TDRAGME INTOTHIS." "IF WE GET CAUGHT, I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENTER THE CONTEST AGAIN." "IF WE GET CAUGHT, I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO ENTER THE CONTEST AGAIN." "PLEASE,YOUDON'TNEEDTHEM ." "ABLE TO ENTER THE CONTEST AGAIN." "PLEASE,YOUDON'TNEEDTHEM ." "COME ON." "PLEASE,YOUDON'TNEEDTHEM ." "COME ON." "YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO SEE HOW YOU" "COME ON." "YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO SEE HOW YOU DID." "OKAY." ""ORIGINALITY, 9." "PRESENTATION, 9." "SKILL LEVEL, 6."" "PRESENTATION, 9." "SKILL LEVEL, 6." WHATEVER." "SKILL LEVEL, 6." WHATEVER." ""EXECUTION, 8." "WHATEVER." ""EXECUTION, 8." "AUDIENCE RESPONSE, 10."" ""EXECUTION, 8." "AUDIENCE RESPONSE, 10." WOW!" "AUDIENCE RESPONSE, 10." WOW!" "TOTAL, 42." "WOW!" "TOTAL, 42." "WHAT?" "TOTAL, 42." "WHAT?" "42." "WHAT?" "42." "THATDOESN'TMAKEANY SENSE." "42." "THATDOESN'TMAKEANY SENSE." "I GOT A 40." "THATDOESN'TMAKEANY SENSE." "I GOT A 40." "WHAT THE HELL?" "I GOT A 40." "WHAT THE HELL?" "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE" "WHAT THE HELL?" "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE FINALS, NOT ME." "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE IN THE FINALS, NOT ME." "LETMESEETHESE." "FINALS, NOT ME." "LETMESEETHESE." "I WAS ONE OF THE TOP SCORES." "LETMESEETHESE." "I WAS ONE OF THE TOP SCORES." "I WAS AS GOOD AS ANY OF THEM." "I WAS ONE OF THE TOP SCORES." "I WAS AS GOOD AS ANY OF THEM." "WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS?" "I WAS AS GOOD AS ANY OF THEM." "WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS?" "WEHAVETO TALKTODON." "WHY WOULD THEY DO THIS?" "WEHAVETO TALKTODON." "WAIT." "THISISN'TRIGHT." "WEHAVETO TALKTODON." "WAIT." "THISISN'TRIGHT." "WE WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO SEE" "WAIT." "THISISN'TRIGHT." "WE WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO SEE THESE." "WE WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO SEE THESE." "YOU CAN'T SAY ANYTHING." "THESE." "YOU CAN'T SAY ANYTHING." "I'MNOTGONNAKEEPQUIET" "YOU CAN'T SAY ANYTHING." "I'MNOTGONNAKEEPQUIET ABOUT THIS." "I'MNOTGONNAKEEPQUIET ABOUT THIS." "YOU'REINTHEFINALS." "ABOUT THIS." "YOU'REINTHEFINALS." "YOU DESERVE TO BE IN THE FINALS." "YOU'REINTHEFINALS." "YOU DESERVE TO BE IN THE FINALS." "DON'T SCREW THIS UP." "YOU DESERVE TO BE IN THE FINALS." "DON'T SCREW THIS UP." "FINE." "I 'LLPUTTHEMBACK." "DON'T SCREW THIS UP." "FINE." "I 'LLPUTTHEMBACK." "NOBODY WILL KNOW." "FINE." "I 'LLPUTTHEMBACK." "NOBODY WILL KNOW." "IT'LL BE OUR LITTLE SECRET." "SAWYOUTALKINGTOSTACY." "WEWEREJUSTDOINGSOME CARD  TRICKS." "WEWEREJUSTDOINGSOME CARD  TRICKS." "HMM." "TRICKS." "HMM." "WELL, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU" "HMM." "WELL, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING." "WELL, I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING." "IT'S KIND OF HUSH-HUSH." "ABOUT SOMETHING." "IT'S KIND OF HUSH-HUSH." "OKAY." "IT'S KIND OF HUSH-HUSH." "OKAY." "THATACT" " ONEOFTHE" "OKAY." "THATACT" " ONEOFTHE JUDGES, FOO LING YU, HE THOUGHT" "THATACT" " ONEOFTHE JUDGES, FOO LING YU, HE THOUGHT YOU SHOULD BE IN THE FINALS, BUT" "JUDGES, FOO LING YU, HE THOUGHT YOU SHOULD BE IN THE FINALS, BUT FOR ME, IT NEEDED MORE MAGIC." "YOU SHOULD BE IN THE FINALS, BUT FOR ME, IT NEEDED MORE MAGIC." "O-OKAY,I 'LLKEEPTHATIN" "FOR ME, IT NEEDED MORE MAGIC." "O-OKAY,I 'LLKEEPTHATIN MIND." "O-OKAY,I 'LLKEEPTHATIN MIND." "UM..." "HOWMUCHWOULDWEHAVE" "MIND." "UM..." "HOWMUCHWOULDWEHAVE  TO PAY YOU TO GET YOU TO PERFORM" "UM..." "HOWMUCHWOULDWEHAVE  TO PAY YOU TO GET YOU TO PERFORM FOR THE CLOSING-NIGHT GALA" "TO PAY YOU TO GET YOU TO PERFORM FOR THE CLOSING-NIGHT GALA SATURDAY NIGHT?" "FOR THE CLOSING-NIGHT GALA SATURDAY NIGHT?" "REALLY?" "WOW!" "SATURDAY NIGHT?" "REALLY?" "WOW!" "ANYTHING " " NOTHING!" "REALLY?" "WOW!" "ANYTHING " " NOTHING!" "BECAUSEITWASVERYCREATIVE," "ANYTHING " " NOTHING!" "BECAUSEITWASVERYCREATIVE, AND WE THINK IT WOULD GO REALLY" "BECAUSEITWASVERYCREATIVE, AND WE THINK IT WOULD GO REALLY WELL WITH THE CLOSING-NIGHT" "AND WE THINK IT WOULD GO REALLY WELL WITH THE CLOSING-NIGHT SHOW." "WELL WITH THE CLOSING-NIGHT SHOW." "TECH REHEARSAL IS NOON SATURDAY." "SHOW." "TECH REHEARSAL IS NOON SATURDAY." "THANKS." "WE'LLBE THERE." "[ HORN HONKING ] CANI HAVETHELIGHTONHER FACE?" "CANI HAVETHELIGHTONHER FACE?" "IT'S TOO BRIGHT." "FACE?" "IT'S TOO BRIGHT." "TAKE IT DOWN TO 5." "IT'S TOO BRIGHT." "TAKE IT DOWN TO 5." "SO,DON,WHYWAS IPICKEDAS" "TAKE IT DOWN TO 5." "SO,DON,WHYWAS IPICKEDAS A FINALIST?" "SO,DON,WHYWAS IPICKEDAS A FINALIST?" "BACKUPTO 7." "A FINALIST?" "BACKUPTO 7." "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" "BACKUPTO 7." "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" "IMEAN,HOWDOESTHEJUDGING" "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" "IMEAN,HOWDOESTHEJUDGING WORK?" "IMEAN,HOWDOESTHEJUDGING WORK?" "WEHAVEASYSTEM." "WORK?" "WEHAVEASYSTEM." "IT'S CONFIDENTIAL." "WEHAVEASYSTEM." "IT'S CONFIDENTIAL." "SO,WHAT,THESCORESARE" "IT'S CONFIDENTIAL." "SO,WHAT,THESCORESARE BOGUS?" "SO,WHAT,THESCORESARE BOGUS?" "YOU JUST PICK WHO YOU WANT?" "BOGUS?" "YOU JUST PICK WHO YOU WANT?" "WEHAVESIXACTSTOTECH." "YOU JUST PICK WHO YOU WANT?" "WEHAVESIXACTSTOTECH." "CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS LATER?" "WEHAVESIXACTSTOTECH." "CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS LATER?" "IWASTHINKINGOFADDINGA" "CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS LATER?" "IWASTHINKINGOFADDINGA LITTLE CARD MANIPULATION." "IWASTHINKINGOFADDINGA LITTLE CARD MANIPULATION." "WHAT DO YOU THINK?" "LITTLE CARD MANIPULATION." "WHAT DO YOU THINK?" "OH, 40." "WHAT DO YOU THINK?" "OH, 40." "JASON KANT, 42." "OH, 40." "JASON KANT, 42." "MR. LUCKY, 41." "JASON KANT, 42." "MR. LUCKY, 41." "SLIDE JESTER, 41." "MR. LUCKY, 41." "SLIDE JESTER, 41." "ALL HIGHER SCORES THAN ON THE" "SLIDE JESTER, 41." "ALL HIGHER SCORES THAN ON THE FINALS." "ALL HIGHER SCORES THAN ON THE FINALS." "HOWDIDYOUGET THOSE?" "FINALS." "HOWDIDYOUGET THOSE?" "YOUUSEDAPIN-AND-TUMBLER" "HOWDIDYOUGET THOSE?" "YOUUSEDAPIN-AND-TUMBLER LOCK, DON." "YOUUSEDAPIN-AND-TUMBLER LOCK, DON." "THE YOUNG MAGICIANS' CLUB CAN" "LOCK, DON." "THE YOUNG MAGICIANS' CLUB CAN PICK LOCKS MORE SOPHISTICATED" "THE YOUNG MAGICIANS' CLUB CAN PICK LOCKS MORE SOPHISTICATED THAN THAT." "PICK LOCKS MORE SOPHISTICATED THAN THAT." "IT'SNONEOF YOURBUSINESS" "THAN THAT." "IT'SNONEOF YOURBUSINESS HOW WE DECIDE." "IT'SNONEOF YOURBUSINESS HOW WE DECIDE." "WHAT'STODECIDE?" "HOW WE DECIDE." "WHAT'STODECIDE?" "JUST ADD UP THE SCORES AND TELL" "WHAT'STODECIDE?" "JUST ADD UP THE SCORES AND TELL US WHO WON." "JUST ADD UP THE SCORES AND TELL US WHO WON." "IT'SA LOTMORECOMPLICATED" "US WHO WON." "IT'SA LOTMORECOMPLICATED THAN THAT!" "IT'SA LOTMORECOMPLICATED THAN THAT!" "HOW?" "THAN THAT!" "HOW?" "TELL ME HOW." "HOW?" "TELL ME HOW." "LOOK." "TELL ME HOW." "LOOK." "THE REASON YOU'RE IN THE SHOW IS" "LOOK." "THE REASON YOU'RE IN THE SHOW IS BECAUSE YOU'RE A WOMAN." "WHY?" "WHYWOULDYOU DOTHAT ?" "DON'TBENAIVE!" "WE HAVE A FULL HOUSE TONIGHT." "DON'TBENAIVE!" "WE HAVE A FULL HOUSE TONIGHT." "WE WANT VARIETY." "WE HAVE A FULL HOUSE TONIGHT." "WE WANT VARIETY." "OF COURSE WE TAKE THE TOP ACTS." "WE WANT VARIETY." "OF COURSE WE TAKE THE TOP ACTS." "WE TAKE THE TOP ILLUSIONIST, THE" "OF COURSE WE TAKE THE TOP ACTS." "WE TAKE THE TOP ILLUSIONIST, THE TOP MANIPULATOR, THE TOP DOVE" "WE TAKE THE TOP ILLUSIONIST, THE TOP MANIPULATOR, THE TOP DOVE ACT." "TOP MANIPULATOR, THE TOP DOVE ACT." "YOU'RE THE TOP FEMALE ACT," "ACT." "YOU'RE THE TOP FEMALE ACT, SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT." "YOU'RE THE TOP FEMALE ACT, SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT." "LAST YEAR, IT WAS JUGGLERS." "SOMETHING A LITTLE DIFFERENT." "LAST YEAR, IT WAS JUGGLERS." "THIS YEAR, IT'S YOU." "LAST YEAR, IT WAS JUGGLERS." "THIS YEAR, IT'S YOU." "OH,SO,I'MACATEGORY?" "THIS YEAR, IT'S YOU." "OH,SO,I'MACATEGORY?" "I'M A FREAK SHOW?" "OH,SO,I'MACATEGORY?" "I'M A FREAK SHOW?" ""OH, LOOK." "I'M A FREAK SHOW?" ""OH, LOOK." "A WOMAN CAN DO MAGIC " " HOW" ""OH, LOOK." "A WOMAN CAN DO MAGIC " " HOW UNUSUAL." "A WOMAN CAN DO MAGIC " " HOW UNUSUAL." "NEXT UP, TWO-HEADED BABIES"?" "UNUSUAL." "NEXT UP, TWO-HEADED BABIES"?" "IT'SANOPPORTUNITY." "NEXT UP, TWO-HEADED BABIES"?" "IT'SANOPPORTUNITY." "DOESN'T MATTER WHY YOU'RE IN." "IT'SANOPPORTUNITY." "DOESN'T MATTER WHY YOU'RE IN." "YOU'RE IN." "DOESN'T MATTER WHY YOU'RE IN." "YOU'RE IN." "SO, STOP WITH THE HYSTERICS AND" "YOU'RE IN." "SO, STOP WITH THE HYSTERICS AND BE A PROFESSIONAL." "SO, STOP WITH THE HYSTERICS AND BE A PROFESSIONAL." "PROFESSIONAL?" "BE A PROFESSIONAL." "PROFESSIONAL?" "I'VE BEEN A PROFESSIONAL SINCE I" "PROFESSIONAL?" "I'VE BEEN A PROFESSIONAL SINCE I WAS 10 YEARS OLD." "I'VE BEEN A PROFESSIONAL SINCE I WAS 10 YEARS OLD." "YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A HACK!" "WAS 10 YEARS OLD." "YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A HACK!" "ISTHATWHATYOU THINK?" "YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A HACK!" "ISTHATWHATYOU THINK?" "WELL, THIS IS MY SHOW, AND YOU" "ISTHATWHATYOU THINK?" "WELL, THIS IS MY SHOW, AND YOU ARE OUT OF IT." "WELL, THIS IS MY SHOW, AND YOU ARE OUT OF IT." "YOU BLEW IT." "ARE OUT OF IT." "YOU BLEW IT." "NOW GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!" "MR. EDDIE FOX, YOU'RE NEXT." "[CRYING]" "ELLEN,IT'SJASON." "YOU'VE BEEN GONE ALL NIGHT." "LOOK." "PLEASE CALL ME BACK." "YOU'VE BEEN GONE ALL NIGHT." "LOOK." "PLEASE CALL ME BACK." "I KNOW YOU'RE MAD AT ME, BUT" "LOOK." "PLEASE CALL ME BACK." "I KNOW YOU'RE MAD AT ME, BUT I'VE GOT REALLY EXCITING NEWS." "I KNOW YOU'RE MAD AT ME, BUT I'VE GOT REALLY EXCITING NEWS." "YOUNEVERTELLAWOMANSHE'S" "I'VE GOT REALLY EXCITING NEWS." "YOUNEVERTELLAWOMANSHE'S  ANNOYING." "YOUNEVERTELLAWOMANSHE'S  ANNOYING." "SHEWAS." "ANNOYING." "SHEWAS." "ANDNOWSHE'SGONE." "SHEWAS." "ANDNOWSHE'SGONE." "GOOD JOB." "ANDNOWSHE'SGONE." "GOOD JOB." "HERE'SHERLASTFACEBOOK" "GOOD JOB." "HERE'SHERLASTFACEBOOK POST." "HERE'SHERLASTFACEBOOK POST." ""OFF ON A SECRET ADVENTURE."" "POST." ""OFF ON A SECRET ADVENTURE." SHE POSTED THAT 30 MINUTES AGO." ""OFF ON A SECRET ADVENTURE." SHE POSTED THAT 30 MINUTES AGO." "YOUNEVERSHOULDHAVEGOTTEN" "SHE POSTED THAT 30 MINUTES AGO." "YOUNEVERSHOULDHAVEGOTTEN INVOLVED WITH HER IN THE FIRST" "YOUNEVERSHOULDHAVEGOTTEN INVOLVED WITH HER IN THE FIRST PLACE." "INVOLVED WITH HER IN THE FIRST PLACE." "YOU NEVER STICK YOUR WAND IN" "PLACE." "YOU NEVER STICK YOUR WAND IN YOUR MAGICAL BUNNY." "YOU NEVER STICK YOUR WAND IN YOUR MAGICAL BUNNY." "WHAT?" "!" "YOUR MAGICAL BUNNY." "WHAT?" "!" "BUSINESS/PLEASURE." "WHAT?" "!" "BUSINESS/PLEASURE." "SHEJUSTPOSTEDALINK ." "BUSINESS/PLEASURE." "SHEJUSTPOSTEDALINK ." "IT'S A MAP." "SHEJUSTPOSTEDALINK ." "IT'S A MAP." "CLICKIT." "WHEREDOESITGO ?" "IT'S A MAP." "CLICKIT." "WHEREDOESITGO ?" "TIJUANA." "CLICKIT." "WHEREDOESITGO ?" "TIJUANA." "NO!" "NO." "TIJUANA." "NO!" "NO." "DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT." "NO!" "NO." "DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT." "WE'REGOINGTO MEXICO." "DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT." "WE'REGOINGTO MEXICO." "YOUDON'TEVENKNOWWHERE" "WE'REGOINGTO MEXICO." "YOUDON'TEVENKNOWWHERE SHE'S GONNA BE." "YOUDON'TEVENKNOWWHERE SHE'S GONNA BE." "AND I'M ALREADY MISSING THE" "SHE'S GONNA BE." "AND I'M ALREADY MISSING THE BALLOON-ANIMAL LECTURE." "[ TRADITIONAL MEXICAN MUSIC PLAYS ] SHE POSTED A PHOTO " "PLAYS ] SHE POSTED A PHOTO -- EL CORTEZ MOTEL." "SHE POSTED A PHOTO -- EL CORTEZ MOTEL." "SHE'SSTAYINGOVER?" "EL CORTEZ MOTEL." "SHE'SSTAYINGOVER?" "YEAH." "SHE'SSTAYINGOVER?" "YEAH." "AND THEY'VE GOT A JACUZZI." "THERESHEIS ." "ELLEN, PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR." "ELLEN?" "OH,HEY." "ELLEN?" "OH,HEY." "THIS ISN'T THE BEST TIME." "OH,HEY." "THIS ISN'T THE BEST TIME." "ICALLEDYOU20TIMES." "THIS ISN'T THE BEST TIME." "ICALLEDYOU20TIMES." "IKNOW." "ICALLEDYOU20TIMES." "IKNOW." "I DELETED THEM." "IKNOW." "I DELETED THEM." "I HAD ENOUGH OF LISTENING TO" "I DELETED THEM." "I HAD ENOUGH OF LISTENING TO YOUR LIES." "I HAD ENOUGH OF LISTENING TO YOUR LIES." "YOUHAVETO COMEBACK." "YOUR LIES." "YOUHAVETO COMEBACK." "WE GOT BOOKED." "YOUHAVETO COMEBACK." "WE GOT BOOKED." "THEY WANT US TO PERFORM ON" "WE GOT BOOKED." "THEY WANT US TO PERFORM ON SATURDAY NIGHT'S SHOW." "THEY WANT US TO PERFORM ON SATURDAY NIGHT'S SHOW." "REALLY?" "SATURDAY NIGHT'S SHOW." "REALLY?" "YEAH." "REALLY?" "YEAH." "BUTI THOUGHTTHEFINALSWERE" "YEAH." "BUTI THOUGHTTHEFINALSWERE  TONIGHT." "BUTI THOUGHTTHEFINALSWERE  TONIGHT." "THEYARE,BUTTHISISEVEN" "TONIGHT." "THEYARE,BUTTHISISEVEN BETTER." "THEYARE,BUTTHISISEVEN BETTER." "THEY WANT US TO PERFORM ON THE" "BETTER." "THEY WANT US TO PERFORM ON THE SATURDAY-NIGHT GALA." "THEY WANT US TO PERFORM ON THE SATURDAY-NIGHT GALA." "WOW." "SATURDAY-NIGHT GALA." "WOW." "I WAS REALLY GOOD." "WOW." "I WAS REALLY GOOD." "BUT I CAN'T DO IT." "I WAS REALLY GOOD." "BUT I CAN'T DO IT." "WHYNOT?" "BUT I CAN'T DO IT." "WHYNOT?" "IT'SMYBIRTHDAY." "WHYNOT?" "IT'SMYBIRTHDAY." "WE'RE TRAVELING ALL OVER MEXICO" "IT'SMYBIRTHDAY." "WE'RE TRAVELING ALL OVER MEXICO TOGETHER." "WE'RE TRAVELING ALL OVER MEXICO TOGETHER." "ME..." "AND HERMAN." "TOGETHER." "ME..." "AND HERMAN." "HERMAN?" "THIS IS A HUGE OPPORTUNITY." "WE'RE GONNA BE PERFORMING SIDE BY SIDE WITH SOME OF THE" "WE'RE GONNA BE PERFORMING SIDE BY SIDE WITH SOME OF THE BIGGEST NAMES IN MAGIC." "BY SIDE WITH SOME OF THE BIGGEST NAMES IN MAGIC." "THERE'S GONNA BE ALL KINDS OF" "BIGGEST NAMES IN MAGIC." "THERE'S GONNA BE ALL KINDS OF IMPORTANT PEOPLE THERE " "THERE'S GONNA BE ALL KINDS OF IMPORTANT PEOPLE THERE -- PENN  TELLER," "IMPORTANT PEOPLE THERE -- PENN  TELLER, DAVID COPPERFIELD, CRIS ANGEL." "PENN  TELLER, DAVID COPPERFIELD, CRIS ANGEL." "IDON'TKNOWWHO THOSEPEOPLE" "DAVID COPPERFIELD, CRIS ANGEL." "IDON'TKNOWWHO THOSEPEOPLE ARE." "IDON'TKNOWWHO THOSEPEOPLE ARE." "THEY'REHACKS!" "ARE." "THEY'REHACKS!" "THEREWILLBE PEOPLEWHO CAN" "THEY'REHACKS!" "THEREWILLBE PEOPLEWHO CAN  BOOK US PLACES " "THEREWILLBE PEOPLEWHO CAN  BOOK US PLACES -- THE MAGIC PALACE, VEGAS CASINOS," "BOOK US PLACES -- THE MAGIC PALACE, VEGAS CASINOS, TV SPECIALS." "THE MAGIC PALACE, VEGAS CASINOS, TV SPECIALS." "LOOK." "TV SPECIALS." "LOOK." "I CAN PUT MY CONDOM ON WITHOUT" "LOOK." "I CAN PUT MY CONDOM ON WITHOUT USING MY HANDS." "I CAN PUT MY CONDOM ON WITHOUT USING MY HANDS." "[LAUGHS]" "USING MY HANDS." "[LAUGHS] I DON'T REALLY WANT TO BE WITH" "[LAUGHS] I DON'T REALLY WANT TO BE WITH PEOPLE WHO FIND ME ANNOYING." "I DON'T REALLY WANT TO BE WITH PEOPLE WHO FIND ME ANNOYING." "YOU'RENOTANNOYING." "PEOPLE WHO FIND ME ANNOYING." "YOU'RENOTANNOYING." "I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT." "YOU'RENOTANNOYING." "I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT." "I WAS AN ASS." "I SHOULDN'T HAVE SAID THAT." "I WAS AN ASS." "BUT THIS IS AN ACTING JOB." "I WAS AN ASS." "BUT THIS IS AN ACTING JOB." "THIS IS A SHOWCASE FOR YOU." "BUT THIS IS AN ACTING JOB." "THIS IS A SHOWCASE FOR YOU." "ITOLDYOU." "THIS IS A SHOWCASE FOR YOU." "ITOLDYOU." "I'M NOT REALLY AN ACTOR." "ITOLDYOU." "I'M NOT REALLY AN ACTOR." "THEN,WHYDIDYOU DOITIN" "I'M NOT REALLY AN ACTOR." "THEN,WHYDIDYOU DOITIN  THE FIRST PLACE?" "THEN,WHYDIDYOU DOITIN  THE FIRST PLACE?" "TOBENEARSTEVE." "THE FIRST PLACE?" "TOBENEARSTEVE." "BUT NOW I HATE HIM." "TOBENEARSTEVE." "BUT NOW I HATE HIM." "AND I HATE YOU!" "BUT NOW I HATE HIM." "AND I HATE YOU!" "LOOK." "AND I HATE YOU!" "LOOK." "THERE MUST BE 200 MAGIC" "LOOK." "THERE MUST BE 200 MAGIC ASSISTANTS RUNNING AROUND THAT" "THERE MUST BE 200 MAGIC ASSISTANTS RUNNING AROUND THAT PLACE." "ASSISTANTS RUNNING AROUND THAT PLACE." "THROW A RABBIT, AND YOU'LL HIT" "PLACE." "THROW A RABBIT, AND YOU'LL HIT ONE." "THROW A RABBIT, AND YOU'LL HIT ONE." "THISISN'TANORMALMAGIC" "ONE." "THISISN'TANORMALMAGIC ACT." "THISISN'TANORMALMAGIC ACT." "I NEED SOMEONE WHO'S REALLY" "ACT." "I NEED SOMEONE WHO'S REALLY FUNNY." "I NEED SOMEONE WHO'S REALLY FUNNY." "YOU'RE FANTASTIC IN THIS ROLE." "FUNNY." "YOU'RE FANTASTIC IN THIS ROLE." "I'MSORRY." "YOU'RE FANTASTIC IN THIS ROLE." "I'MSORRY." "GOOD LUCK." "OH." "EXPIRED." "SO,WILLYOUDOIT?" "EXPIRED." "SO,WILLYOUDOIT?" "YOUWANTME TO PUTONA DRESS" "SO,WILLYOUDOIT?" "YOUWANTME TO PUTONA DRESS AND ACT LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND?" "YOUWANTME TO PUTONA DRESS AND ACT LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND?" "WECOULDBE AGAY COUPLE." "AND ACT LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND?" "WECOULDBE AGAY COUPLE." "NO." "WECOULDBE AGAY COUPLE." "NO." "NO, WE CAN'T." "NO." "NO, WE CAN'T." "LOOK." "NO, WE CAN'T." "LOOK." "I'D LIKE TO HELP WITH YOUR ACT," "LOOK." "I'D LIKE TO HELP WITH YOUR ACT, BUT I DON'T HAVE TIME." "I'D LIKE TO HELP WITH YOUR ACT, BUT I DON'T HAVE TIME." "I HAVE THE CLOSE-UP SHOW" "BUT I DON'T HAVE TIME." "I HAVE THE CLOSE-UP SHOW TOMORROW AFTERNOON." "I HAVE THE CLOSE-UP SHOW TOMORROW AFTERNOON." "I HAVE TO REHEARSE." "TOMORROW AFTERNOON." "I HAVE TO REHEARSE." "AND, BY THE WAY, I'D LIKE YOU TO" "I HAVE TO REHEARSE." "AND, BY THE WAY, I'D LIKE YOU TO DO THE INTRODUCTION." "AND, BY THE WAY, I'D LIKE YOU TO DO THE INTRODUCTION." "OH." "SURE." "DO THE INTRODUCTION." "OH." "SURE." "WHYDON'TYOUHAVESTACYHELP" "OH." "SURE." "WHYDON'TYOUHAVESTACYHELP YOU WITH ACT?" "WHYDON'TYOUHAVESTACYHELP YOU WITH ACT?" "IDON'TTRUSTHER ." "YOU WITH ACT?" "IDON'TTRUSTHER ." "SHE STOLE MY WALLET, MY ROOM" "IDON'TTRUSTHER ." "SHE STOLE MY WALLET, MY ROOM KEY, THE SCORECARDS." "SHE STOLE MY WALLET, MY ROOM KEY, THE SCORECARDS." "SHE SEEMS TO BE PRACTICALLY" "KEY, THE SCORECARDS." "SHE SEEMS TO BE PRACTICALLY HOMELESS." "SHE SEEMS TO BE PRACTICALLY HOMELESS." "YOUSAWHERACT ." "HOMELESS." "YOUSAWHERACT ." "BREAKING UP WITH NATHAN MUST" "YOUSAWHERACT ." "BREAKING UP WITH NATHAN MUST HAVE REALLY MESSED HER UP." "BREAKING UP WITH NATHAN MUST HAVE REALLY MESSED HER UP." "OKAY." "HAVE REALLY MESSED HER UP." "OKAY." "WELL, I'VE BEEN DUMPED BEFORE," "OKAY." "WELL, I'VE BEEN DUMPED BEFORE, AND I DIDN'T BECOME A THIEF." "WELL, I'VE BEEN DUMPED BEFORE, AND I DIDN'T BECOME A THIEF." "I'VENEVERBEENDUMPED,BUT" "AND I DIDN'T BECOME A THIEF." "I'VENEVERBEENDUMPED,BUT THESE THINGS HAPPEN." "I'VENEVERBEENDUMPED,BUT THESE THINGS HAPPEN." "SHE'S AN ARTIST." "THESE THINGS HAPPEN." "SHE'S AN ARTIST." "SHE LIVES ON THE EDGE." "SHE'S AN ARTIST." "SHE LIVES ON THE EDGE." "I CAN RELATE." "SHE LIVES ON THE EDGE." "I CAN RELATE." "SO,YOU'RESAYINGI'M NOT AN" "I CAN RELATE." "SO,YOU'RESAYINGI'M NOT AN ARTIST." "SO,YOU'RESAYINGI'M NOT AN ARTIST." "NO,NO." "ARTIST." "NO,NO." "I'M NOT SAYING THAT." "NO,NO." "I'M NOT SAYING THAT." "YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE." "I'M NOT SAYING THAT." "YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE." "YOU PAY TAXES." "YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE." "YOU PAY TAXES." "YOUDON'TPAYTAXES?" "YOU PAY TAXES." "YOUDON'TPAYTAXES?" "IPAYTAXES..." "USUALLY." "YOUDON'TPAYTAXES?" "IPAYTAXES..." "USUALLY." "IREALLYLIKEHER ." "IPAYTAXES..." "USUALLY." "IREALLYLIKEHER ." "I JUST DON'T KNOW IF WE'RE" "IREALLYLIKEHER ." "I JUST DON'T KNOW IF WE'RE COMPATIBLE." "I JUST DON'T KNOW IF WE'RE COMPATIBLE." "SHE'LL PULL ME INTO HER SORDID" "COMPATIBLE." "SHE'LL PULL ME INTO HER SORDID LIFE." "SHE'LL PULL ME INTO HER SORDID LIFE." "WE'LL BE THE NEXT BONNIE AND" "LIFE." "WE'LL BE THE NEXT BONNIE AND CLYDE." "WE'LL BE THE NEXT BONNIE AND CLYDE." "SHEMAYBE BONNIE,BUT YOU 'RE" "CLYDE." "SHEMAYBE BONNIE,BUT YOU 'RE NO CLYDE." "SHEMAYBE BONNIE,BUT YOU 'RE NO CLYDE." "IT'SJUST,I'MNOT REALLY" "NO CLYDE." "IT'SJUST,I'MNOT REALLY SURE HOW SHE GETS BY." "IT'SJUST,I'MNOT REALLY SURE HOW SHE GETS BY." "I'M NOT SURE THAT IT'S LEGAL." "SURE HOW SHE GETS BY." "I'M NOT SURE THAT IT'S LEGAL." "I KIND OF SUSPECT IT'S NOT." "I'M NOT SURE THAT IT'S LEGAL." "I KIND OF SUSPECT IT'S NOT." "I WOULDN'T PUT IT PAST HER TO" "I KIND OF SUSPECT IT'S NOT." "I WOULDN'T PUT IT PAST HER TO HOT-WIRE MY CAR." "I WOULDN'T PUT IT PAST HER TO HOT-WIRE MY CAR." "WHYWOULDIHOT-WIREIT?" "HOT-WIRE MY CAR." "WHYWOULDIHOT-WIREIT?" "I ALREADY HAVE THE KEY." "WHYWOULDIHOT-WIREIT?" "I ALREADY HAVE THE KEY." "WHATAREYOUDOINGBACK" "I ALREADY HAVE THE KEY." "WHATAREYOUDOINGBACK  THERE?" "WHATAREYOUDOINGBACK  THERE?" "MYCARGOTTOWED." "THERE?" "MYCARGOTTOWED." "YES,BUTWHATARE YOU DOING" "MYCARGOTTOWED." "YES,BUTWHATARE YOU DOING IN MY CAR?" "YES,BUTWHATARE YOU DOING IN MY CAR?" "GOTTOSLEEPSOMEWHERE,DON'T" "IN MY CAR?" "GOTTOSLEEPSOMEWHERE,DON'T I?" "GOTTOSLEEPSOMEWHERE,DON'T I?" "YOUWERESLEEPINGINHISCAR?" "I?" "YOUWERESLEEPINGINHISCAR?" "NO,I WASSLEEPINGINMYCAR," "YOUWERESLEEPINGINHISCAR?" "NO,I WASSLEEPINGINMYCAR, AND THEN THOSE BASTARDS TOWED" "NO,I WASSLEEPINGINMYCAR, AND THEN THOSE BASTARDS TOWED IT, AND THEN, I SLEPT IN HIS" "AND THEN THOSE BASTARDS TOWED IT, AND THEN, I SLEPT IN HIS CAR." "IT, AND THEN, I SLEPT IN HIS CAR." "ITHOUGHTYOUWERESTAYINGIN" "CAR." "ITHOUGHTYOUWERESTAYINGIN A HOTEL OUT IN THE BOONIES." "ITHOUGHTYOUWERESTAYINGIN A HOTEL OUT IN THE BOONIES." "YOUEMBARRASSME NOW,AFTER" "A HOTEL OUT IN THE BOONIES." "YOUEMBARRASSME NOW,AFTER YOU'VE BEEN TALKING CRAP ABOUT" "YOUEMBARRASSME NOW,AFTER YOU'VE BEEN TALKING CRAP ABOUT ME?" "YOU'VE BEEN TALKING CRAP ABOUT ME?" "WAIT." "WHENARETHE FINALS?" "ME?" "WAIT." "WHENARETHE FINALS?" "AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE THERE?" "WAIT." "WHENARETHE FINALS?" "AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE THERE?" "IGOTKICKEDOUT OFTHESHOW." "AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE THERE?" "IGOTKICKEDOUT OFTHESHOW." "WHAT?" "IGOTKICKEDOUT OFTHESHOW." "WHAT?" "YOU TOLD HIM ABOUT THE" "WHAT?" "YOU TOLD HIM ABOUT THE SCORECARDS, DIDN'T YOU?" "YOU TOLD HIM ABOUT THE SCORECARDS, DIDN'T YOU?" "I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT." "SCORECARDS, DIDN'T YOU?" "I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT." "HEY,IFYOUWANTMETO DO" "I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT." "HEY,IFYOUWANTMETO DO  THIS ACT WITH YOU, YOU BETTER" "HEY,IFYOUWANTMETO DO  THIS ACT WITH YOU, YOU BETTER CHANGE YOUR TONE OF VOICE." "THIS ACT WITH YOU, YOU BETTER CHANGE YOUR TONE OF VOICE." "YOU'LLDOTHEACT ?" "CHANGE YOUR TONE OF VOICE." "YOU'LLDOTHEACT ?" "ANDSINCEYOURYAPPING" "YOU'LLDOTHEACT ?" "ANDSINCEYOURYAPPING GIRLFRIEND IS OUT OF THE" "ANDSINCEYOURYAPPING GIRLFRIEND IS OUT OF THE PICTURE, I'LL CRASH IN YOUR ROOM" "GIRLFRIEND IS OUT OF THE PICTURE, I'LL CRASH IN YOUR ROOM WHILE WE FIX YOUR ACT." "PICTURE, I'LL CRASH IN YOUR ROOM WHILE WE FIX YOUR ACT." "DOESITNEEDFIXING?" "WHILE WE FIX YOUR ACT." "DOESITNEEDFIXING?" "ITNEEDSMOREMAGIC." "DOESITNEEDFIXING?" "ITNEEDSMOREMAGIC." "SHE'SRIGHTABOUTTHAT." "ITNEEDSMOREMAGIC." "SHE'SRIGHTABOUTTHAT." "WE'LLFIXYOURACT ,AND THEN" "SHE'SRIGHTABOUTTHAT." "WE'LLFIXYOURACT ,AND THEN THOSE BASTARDS WILL FINALLY GIVE" "WE'LLFIXYOURACT ,AND THEN THOSE BASTARDS WILL FINALLY GIVE US THE RESPECT WE DESERVE." "THOSE BASTARDS WILL FINALLY GIVE US THE RESPECT WE DESERVE." "PULL OVER." "I GOT TO PISS." "US THE RESPECT WE DESERVE." "PULL OVER." "I GOT TO PISS." "IGOTIT ." "PULL OVER." "I GOT TO PISS." "IGOTIT ." "YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR ASSISTANT" "IGOTIT ." "YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR ASSISTANT COSTUME, AND SO YOU MAGICALLY" "YOU DON'T LIKE YOUR ASSISTANT COSTUME, AND SO YOU MAGICALLY CHANGE IT." "COSTUME, AND SO YOU MAGICALLY CHANGE IT." "OOH,I LIKEIT ." "CHANGE IT." "OOH,I LIKEIT ." "DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THAT?" "OOH,I LIKEIT ." "DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THAT?" "NOIDEA,BUTWE'LLFIGURE" "DO YOU KNOW HOW TO DO THAT?" "NOIDEA,BUTWE'LLFIGURE SOMETHING OUT." "NOIDEA,BUTWE'LLFIGURE SOMETHING OUT." "I JUST NEED TO FIGURE OUT" "SOMETHING OUT." "I JUST NEED TO FIGURE OUT EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE GONNA SAY." "[ SIGHS ]" "WHY THE CHANGE?" "WHATDOYOUMEAN?" "IMEAN,IS IT THATYOU LIKED" "WHATDOYOUMEAN?" "IMEAN,IS IT THATYOU LIKED MY ACT, AND THAT'S WHAT CHANGED" "IMEAN,IS IT THATYOU LIKED MY ACT, AND THAT'S WHAT CHANGED YOUR MIND ABOUT ME?" "MY ACT, AND THAT'S WHAT CHANGED YOUR MIND ABOUT ME?" "ITOLDYOUILOVEDYOURACT." "YOUR MIND ABOUT ME?" "ITOLDYOUILOVEDYOURACT." "IKNOW,BUTWHY ARE YOU HERE" "ITOLDYOUILOVEDYOURACT." "IKNOW,BUTWHY ARE YOU HERE NOW?" "IKNOW,BUTWHY ARE YOU HERE NOW?" "I MEAN, IS IT THE ACT, OR DO YOU" "NOW?" "I MEAN, IS IT THE ACT, OR DO YOU JUST NEED A PLACE TO STAY?" "I MEAN, IS IT THE ACT, OR DO YOU JUST NEED A PLACE TO STAY?" "WHYAREYOUSABOTAGINGTHIS ?" "JUST NEED A PLACE TO STAY?" "WHYAREYOUSABOTAGINGTHIS ?" "ARE YOU THAT INSECURE?" "WHYAREYOUSABOTAGINGTHIS ?" "ARE YOU THAT INSECURE?" "NO." "ARE YOU THAT INSECURE?" "NO." "I MEAN..." "NO." "I MEAN..." "I MEAN, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL." "I MEAN..." "I MEAN, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL." "I JUST WANT TO THROW YOU ON THAT" "I MEAN, YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL." "I JUST WANT TO THROW YOU ON THAT BED AND ATTACK YOU." "I JUST WANT TO THROW YOU ON THAT BED AND ATTACK YOU." "[LAUGHS]" "BED AND ATTACK YOU." "[LAUGHS] WELL?" "[LAUGHS] WELL?" "YOU'RENOTTHEEASIESTPERSON" "WELL?" "YOU'RENOTTHEEASIESTPERSON TO TRUST." "YOU'RENOTTHEEASIESTPERSON TO TRUST." "DIDYOUSWALLOWELLEN?" "TO TRUST." "DIDYOUSWALLOWELLEN?" "IS THAT WHY YOU WON'T SHUT UP?" "DIDYOUSWALLOWELLEN?" "IS THAT WHY YOU WON'T SHUT UP?" "IMEAN,WHAT'SWITHALLTHE" "IS THAT WHY YOU WON'T SHUT UP?" "IMEAN,WHAT'SWITHALLTHE STEALING?" "IMEAN,WHAT'SWITHALLTHE STEALING?" "ARE YOU SOME SORT OF KLEPTO?" "STEALING?" "ARE YOU SOME SORT OF KLEPTO?" "IUSEDTO ASKFOR THINGS." "ARE YOU SOME SORT OF KLEPTO?" "IUSEDTO ASKFOR THINGS." "AND I HEARD "NO" TOO OFTEN." "IUSEDTO ASKFOR THINGS." "AND I HEARD "NO" TOO OFTEN." "SO, NOW I JUST TAKE." "AND I HEARD "NO" TOO OFTEN." "SO, NOW I JUST TAKE." "ANDTHAT'SWHATHAPPENEDIN" "SO, NOW I JUST TAKE." "ANDTHAT'SWHATHAPPENEDIN VEGAS." "ANDTHAT'SWHATHAPPENEDIN VEGAS." "YOU STOLE FROM HIM?" "VEGAS." "YOU STOLE FROM HIM?" "NO,I DIDNOTSTEALFROM HIM." "YOU STOLE FROM HIM?" "NO,I DIDNOTSTEALFROM HIM." "AFTER WE BROKE UP, HE WENT" "NO,I DIDNOTSTEALFROM HIM." "AFTER WE BROKE UP, HE WENT AROUND AND TOLD EVERYONE NOT TO" "AFTER WE BROKE UP, HE WENT AROUND AND TOLD EVERYONE NOT TO HIRE ME." "AROUND AND TOLD EVERYONE NOT TO HIRE ME." "I WENT TO EVERY SHOW IN TOWN." "HIRE ME." "I WENT TO EVERY SHOW IN TOWN." "THEY ALL SAID NO." "I WENT TO EVERY SHOW IN TOWN." "THEY ALL SAID NO." "BUTYOUDIDN'TGIVEUP." "THEY ALL SAID NO." "BUTYOUDIDN'TGIVEUP." "PEOPLE SAY NO TO ME, I JUST GIVE" "BUTYOUDIDN'TGIVEUP." "PEOPLE SAY NO TO ME, I JUST GIVE UP." "PEOPLE SAY NO TO ME, I JUST GIVE UP." "YOUHAVEN'TGIVENUP." "I WANT TO THANK YOU." "YOUR ACT, THE SHOW TOMORROW -- IT'S GIVEN ME A SECOND CHANCE." "LET'S WORK ON THE COSTUME CHANGE." "TOMORROW." "CHANGE." "TOMORROW." "FIRST THING..." "I GOT THE MOST AMAZING IDEA FOR THE ACT, AND NOW SHE'S GONE." "THERE'S ONLY THREE HOURS TILL" "THE ACT, AND NOW SHE'S GONE." "THERE'S ONLY THREE HOURS TILL THE TECH REHEARSAL, AND SHE'S" "THERE'S ONLY THREE HOURS TILL THE TECH REHEARSAL, AND SHE'S GONE." "THE TECH REHEARSAL, AND SHE'S GONE." "RELAX." "GONE." "RELAX." "SHE'S PROBABLY JUST LOOKING FOR" "RELAX." "SHE'S PROBABLY JUST LOOKING FOR A COSTUME." "SHE'S PROBABLY JUST LOOKING FOR A COSTUME." "BY THE WAY, THE COSTUME CHANGE" "A COSTUME." "BY THE WAY, THE COSTUME CHANGE IS A GREAT IDEA." "BY THE WAY, THE COSTUME CHANGE IS A GREAT IDEA." "HOW'DYOUKNOWABOUTTHE" "IS A GREAT IDEA." "HOW'DYOUKNOWABOUTTHE COSTUME CHANGE?" "HOW'DYOUKNOWABOUTTHE COSTUME CHANGE?" "DIDN'TYOUJUSTTELLME?" "COSTUME CHANGE?" "DIDN'TYOUJUSTTELLME?" "NO." "DIDN'TYOUJUSTTELLME?" "NO." "YEAH." "NO." "YEAH." "I GUESS SHE TOLD ME." "YEAH." "I GUESS SHE TOLD ME." "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?" "I GUESS SHE TOLD ME." "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?" "THIS IS GOOD." "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?" "THIS IS GOOD." "THIS WOULD BE GOOD FOR YOUR ACT." "THIS IS GOOD." "THIS WOULD BE GOOD FOR YOUR ACT." "WHENDIDSHETELLYOU?" "THIS WOULD BE GOOD FOR YOUR ACT." "WHENDIDSHETELLYOU?" "IDON'TKNOW." "WHENDIDSHETELLYOU?" "IDON'TKNOW." "IN THE CAR, SOMETIME YESTERDAY?" "IDON'TKNOW." "IN THE CAR, SOMETIME YESTERDAY?" "THAT'SINTERESTING,BECAUSEI" "IN THE CAR, SOMETIME YESTERDAY?" "THAT'SINTERESTING,BECAUSEI CAME UP WITH THE IDEA LAST NIGHT" "THAT'SINTERESTING,BECAUSEI CAME UP WITH THE IDEA LAST NIGHT BEFORE WE WENT TO SLEEP." "CAME UP WITH THE IDEA LAST NIGHT BEFORE WE WENT TO SLEEP." "ISAWHERLASTNIGHT." "BEFORE WE WENT TO SLEEP." "ISAWHERLASTNIGHT." "WHEN?" "ISAWHERLASTNIGHT." "WHEN?" "LOOK." "WHEN?" "LOOK." "WHEN I LEFT YOU GUYS YESTERDAY," "LOOK." "WHEN I LEFT YOU GUYS YESTERDAY, SHE SHOOK MY HAND." "WHEN I LEFT YOU GUYS YESTERDAY, SHE SHOOK MY HAND." "OH." "SHE SHOOK MY HAND." "OH." "WELL, THEN, SHE MUST WANT YOU." "OH." "WELL, THEN, SHE MUST WANT YOU." "ANDSHEGAVEMEA NOTE ." "WELL, THEN, SHE MUST WANT YOU." "ANDSHEGAVEMEA NOTE ." "OH,MYGOD." "ANDSHEGAVEMEA NOTE ." "OH,MYGOD." "NO MORE PARTNER ACTS." "OH,MYGOD." "NO MORE PARTNER ACTS." "I AM SICK OF DEPENDING ON OTHER" "NO MORE PARTNER ACTS." "I AM SICK OF DEPENDING ON OTHER PEOPLE." "I AM SICK OF DEPENDING ON OTHER PEOPLE." "I'M GONNA MAKE A WHOLE, NEW ACT" "PEOPLE." "I'M GONNA MAKE A WHOLE, NEW ACT ALONE." "I'M GONNA MAKE A WHOLE, NEW ACT ALONE." "I DON'T NEED HER." "ALONE." "I DON'T NEED HER." "AND I DON'T NEED YOU." "OW." "OW!" "WHERE'SYOURASSISTANT?" "NOIDEA." "HOWAREYOUGONNADOYOURACT" "NOIDEA." "HOWAREYOUGONNADOYOURACT WITHOUT AN ASSISTANT?" "HOWAREYOUGONNADOYOURACT WITHOUT AN ASSISTANT?" "IHAVEABRAND-NEWACT." "WITHOUT AN ASSISTANT?" "IHAVEABRAND-NEWACT." "NO!" "IHAVEABRAND-NEWACT." "NO!" "WE HIRED YOU TO DO THAT ACT, NOT" "NO!" "WE HIRED YOU TO DO THAT ACT, NOT SOME CRAPPY THING YOU THREW" "WE HIRED YOU TO DO THAT ACT, NOT SOME CRAPPY THING YOU THREW TOGETHER IN THE DEALERS' ROOM." "SOME CRAPPY THING YOU THREW TOGETHER IN THE DEALERS' ROOM." "IT'SNOTCRAP." "TOGETHER IN THE DEALERS' ROOM." "IT'SNOTCRAP." "I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING." "IT'SNOTCRAP." "I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING." "OKAY,GOOD." "GREAT." "I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING." "OKAY,GOOD." "GREAT." "GO DO IT " " JUST NOT ON MY" "OKAY,GOOD." "GREAT." "GO DO IT " " JUST NOT ON MY STAGE." "GO DO IT " " JUST NOT ON MY STAGE." "YOU'RESAYINGNO TO ME ?" "STAGE." "YOU'RESAYINGNO TO ME ?" "THAT'SRIGHT." "YOU'RESAYINGNO TO ME ?" "THAT'SRIGHT." "IWON'TACCEPTIT." "THAT'SRIGHT." "IWON'TACCEPTIT." "I'VE EARNED THIS SPOT." "IWON'TACCEPTIT." "I'VE EARNED THIS SPOT." "CANWEBRINGINTHENEXTACT?" "I'VE EARNED THIS SPOT." "CANWEBRINGINTHENEXTACT?" "HEY,DON." "CANWEBRINGINTHENEXTACT?" "HEY,DON." "HEY,YOURHIGHNESS." "HEY,DON." "HEY,YOURHIGHNESS." "GOODTOSEEYOU ." "HEY,YOURHIGHNESS." "GOODTOSEEYOU ." "GOODTOSEE" "GOODTOSEEYOU ." "GOODTOSEE-- HO-HO!" "GOODTOSEE-- HO-HO!" "WHOA-HO!" "HO-HO!" "WHOA-HO!" "LET'SMAKESOMEMAGIC." "WHOA-HO!" "LET'SMAKESOMEMAGIC." "MERRYCHRISTMAS." "WHAT?" "SHE'SSTILLNOT BACK?" "NO." "SHE'S PROBABLY SLEEPING ON SOME" "NO." "SHE'S PROBABLY SLEEPING ON SOME BENCH SOMEWHERE BECAUSE SHE WAS" "SHE'S PROBABLY SLEEPING ON SOME BENCH SOMEWHERE BECAUSE SHE WAS OUT ALL NIGHT WITH YOU." "BENCH SOMEWHERE BECAUSE SHE WAS OUT ALL NIGHT WITH YOU." "ANDNOW,THESTARSOFMAGIC" "OUT ALL NIGHT WITH YOU." "ANDNOW,THESTARSOFMAGIC  CLOSE-UP SHOW, STARRING" "ANDNOW,THESTARSOFMAGIC  CLOSE-UP SHOW, STARRING STEVE KRAMER AND BRIAN GILLIS." "CLOSE-UP SHOW, STARRING STEVE KRAMER AND BRIAN GILLIS." "ANDRIGHTDOWNTHROUGHTHERE." "STEVE KRAMER AND BRIAN GILLIS." "ANDRIGHTDOWNTHROUGHTHERE." "HOLD IT LEVEL." "ANDRIGHTDOWNTHROUGHTHERE." "HOLD IT LEVEL." "LOOK AT ME, AND WHENEVER YOU" "HOLD IT LEVEL." "LOOK AT ME, AND WHENEVER YOU WANT IT TO EXPLODE, BLINK YOUR" "LOOK AT ME, AND WHENEVER YOU WANT IT TO EXPLODE, BLINK YOUR EYES." "WANT IT TO EXPLODE, BLINK YOUR EYES." "[LAUGHS]" "EYES." "[LAUGHS] [ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ]" "ONEMORETIME,ANEISZKA." "THISNEXTPERFORMER,YOU 'RE GONNA REALLY ENJOY." "HE'S A FANTASTIC MAGICIAN, AND" "GONNA REALLY ENJOY." "HE'S A FANTASTIC MAGICIAN, AND HE'S MY CLOSEST FRIEND." "HE'S A FANTASTIC MAGICIAN, AND HE'S MY CLOSEST FRIEND." "WE MET MANY YEARS BACK AS" "HE'S MY CLOSEST FRIEND." "WE MET MANY YEARS BACK AS TEENAGERS IN MAGIC CAMP." "WE MET MANY YEARS BACK AS TEENAGERS IN MAGIC CAMP." "WE COMPETED AGAINST EACH OTHER." "TEENAGERS IN MAGIC CAMP." "WE COMPETED AGAINST EACH OTHER." "I WON THAT ONE." "WE COMPETED AGAINST EACH OTHER." "I WON THAT ONE." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "I WON THAT ONE." "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] SINCE THEN, HIS CAREER HAS GONE" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ] SINCE THEN, HIS CAREER HAS GONE LEAPS AND BOUNDS." "SINCE THEN, HIS CAREER HAS GONE LEAPS AND BOUNDS." "HE WAS THE HOST OF TV's" "LEAPS AND BOUNDS." "HE WAS THE HOST OF TV's "MAGICIANS ON ICE."" "HE WAS THE HOST OF TV's "MAGICIANS ON ICE." YOU DIDN'T SEE IT?" ""MAGICIANS ON ICE." YOU DIDN'T SEE IT?" "YEAH, NOBODY SAW IT." "YOU DIDN'T SEE IT?" "YEAH, NOBODY SAW IT." "IT WAS TERRIBLE, ABSOLUTELY" "YEAH, NOBODY SAW IT." "IT WAS TERRIBLE, ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE!" "IT WAS TERRIBLE, ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE!" "HE IS A FREQUENT PERFORMER AT" "TERRIBLE!" "HE IS A FREQUENT PERFORMER AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "HE IS A FREQUENT PERFORMER AT THE MAGIC PALACE." "VERY POPULAR WITH THE LADIES." "THE MAGIC PALACE." "VERY POPULAR WITH THE LADIES." "DON'T GO UP TO THE séance ROOM" "VERY POPULAR WITH THE LADIES." "DON'T GO UP TO THE séance ROOM WITH HIM." "DON'T GO UP TO THE séance ROOM WITH HIM." "THE FLOOR'S A LITTLE STICKY." "WITH HIM." "THE FLOOR'S A LITTLE STICKY." "BUT DON'T WORRY, STEVE." "THE FLOOR'S A LITTLE STICKY." "BUT DON'T WORRY, STEVE." "I'VE HEARD THAT YOU GOT YOUR" "BUT DON'T WORRY, STEVE." "I'VE HEARD THAT YOU GOT YOUR PREMATURE-EJACULATION PROBLEM" "I'VE HEARD THAT YOU GOT YOUR PREMATURE-EJACULATION PROBLEM UNDER CONTROL." "PREMATURE-EJACULATION PROBLEM UNDER CONTROL." "[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]" "UNDER CONTROL." "[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL." "[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL." "HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US." "IT'S PERFECTLY NORMAL." "HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US." "AND YOU ARE CERTAINLY ONE OF THE" "HAPPENS TO THE BEST OF US." "AND YOU ARE CERTAINLY ONE OF THE BEST." "AND YOU ARE CERTAINLY ONE OF THE BEST." "SO, LET'S WELCOME STEVE KRAMER," "BEST." "SO, LET'S WELCOME STEVE KRAMER, THE AMAZING EJACULATOR." "SO, LET'S WELCOME STEVE KRAMER, THE AMAZING EJACULATOR." "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ]" "HMM." "THANK YOU, JASON, FOR THAT HUMILIATING INTRODUCTION." "THANK YOU, JASON, FOR THAT HUMILIATING INTRODUCTION." "DON'T WORRY." "HUMILIATING INTRODUCTION." "DON'T WORRY." "I WON'T BE ASKING YOU TO DO THAT" "DON'T WORRY." "I WON'T BE ASKING YOU TO DO THAT AGAIN." "I WON'T BE ASKING YOU TO DO THAT AGAIN." "HI." "AGAIN." "HI." "WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" "HI." "WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" "PEGGY." "WHAT'S YOUR NAME?" "PEGGY." "I'MSTEVE." "NICETOMEET YOU." "PEGGY." "I'MSTEVE." "NICETOMEET YOU." "WOULD YOU MIND HELPING ME OUT?" "I'MSTEVE." "NICETOMEET YOU." "WOULD YOU MIND HELPING ME OUT?" "SURE." "WOULD YOU MIND HELPING ME OUT?" "SURE." "GIVEHERANICEHAND ." "SURE." "GIVEHERANICEHAND ." "YOU WATCH TV?" "GIVEHERANICEHAND ." "YOU WATCH TV?" "YEAH." "YOU WATCH TV?" "YEAH." "HOWABOUTTHOSECSI SHOWS?" "YEAH." "HOWABOUTTHOSECSI SHOWS?" "YEAH." "HOWABOUTTHOSECSI SHOWS?" "YEAH." "YOUNOTICETHATTHEYALWAYS" "YEAH." "YOUNOTICETHATTHEYALWAYS SOLVE THE CRIMES USING DNA," "YOUNOTICETHATTHEYALWAYS SOLVE THE CRIMES USING DNA, RIGHT?" "SOLVE THE CRIMES USING DNA, RIGHT?" "MM-HMM." "RIGHT?" "MM-HMM." "SO,I THOUGHT,WOULDN'TITBE" "MM-HMM." "SO,I THOUGHT,WOULDN'TITBE FUN TO DO MAGIC USING DNA?" "SO,I THOUGHT,WOULDN'TITBE FUN TO DO MAGIC USING DNA?" "SO, HELP ME OUT WITH THAT?" "FUN TO DO MAGIC USING DNA?" "SO, HELP ME OUT WITH THAT?" "SURE." "SO, HELP ME OUT WITH THAT?" "SURE." "PEGGY,JUSTTAKEACARD ,ANY" "SURE." "PEGGY,JUSTTAKEACARD ,ANY CARD." "PEGGY,JUSTTAKEACARD ,ANY CARD." "MIX THEM UP LIKE THAT." "CARD." "MIX THEM UP LIKE THAT." "REMEMBER IT." "MIX THEM UP LIKE THAT." "REMEMBER IT." "SHOW IT TO EVERYBODY, NOT TO ME." "REMEMBER IT." "SHOW IT TO EVERYBODY, NOT TO ME." "AND THEN TURN BACK AROUND." "SHOW IT TO EVERYBODY, NOT TO ME." "AND THEN TURN BACK AROUND." "PEGGY, WE NEED TO MARK THAT CARD" "AND THEN TURN BACK AROUND." "PEGGY, WE NEED TO MARK THAT CARD IN SOME WAY, USING YOUR DNA." "PEGGY, WE NEED TO MARK THAT CARD IN SOME WAY, USING YOUR DNA." "WE CAN USE ANY DNA YOU'D LIKE." "IN SOME WAY, USING YOUR DNA." "WE CAN USE ANY DNA YOU'D LIKE." "I RECOMMEND A KISS." "WE CAN USE ANY DNA YOU'D LIKE." "I RECOMMEND A KISS." "SO, I'M GONNA TURN AROUND." "I RECOMMEND A KISS." "SO, I'M GONNA TURN AROUND." "I'LL MAKE MYSELF LOOK LIKE A" "SO, I'M GONNA TURN AROUND." "I'LL MAKE MYSELF LOOK LIKE A REAL DETECTIVE, AND PLANT A GOOD" "I'LL MAKE MYSELF LOOK LIKE A REAL DETECTIVE, AND PLANT A GOOD ONE ON THE FACE OF THAT CARD," "REAL DETECTIVE, AND PLANT A GOOD ONE ON THE FACE OF THAT CARD, WOULD YOU?" "ONE ON THE FACE OF THAT CARD, WOULD YOU?" "KISS THAT THING, WOULD YOU?" "WOULD YOU?" "KISS THAT THING, WOULD YOU?" "OKAY." "KISS THAT THING, WOULD YOU?" "OKAY." "SHEKISSEDTHECARD." "OKAY." "SHEKISSEDTHECARD." "IT'S A LOT MORE THAN I DID WITH" "SHEKISSEDTHECARD." "IT'S A LOT MORE THAN I DID WITH STACY." "IT'S A LOT MORE THAN I DID WITH STACY." "[ SIGHS ]" "STACY." "[ SIGHS ] SORRY." "[ SIGHS ] SORRY." "PUT IT BACK IN." "SORRY." "PUT IT BACK IN." "NOW, I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT" "PUT IT BACK IN." "NOW, I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT PEGGY'S CARD IS, AND I THINK I" "NOW, I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT PEGGY'S CARD IS, AND I THINK I CAN DO THAT IF YOU..." "PEGGY'S CARD IS, AND I THINK I CAN DO THAT IF YOU..." "KISS ME." "CAN DO THAT IF YOU..." "KISS ME." "[LAUGHS]" "KISS ME." "[LAUGHS] OH,YOU'REWITHHER ,HUH ?" "[LAUGHS] OH,YOU'REWITHHER ,HUH ?" "BECAUSE YOU LOOK PISSED." "OH,YOU'REWITHHER ,HUH ?" "BECAUSE YOU LOOK PISSED." "CALM DOWN." "BECAUSE YOU LOOK PISSED." "CALM DOWN." "ALL RIGHT?" "CALM DOWN." "ALL RIGHT?" "SERIOUSLY, GO AHEAD AND KISS ME." "ALL RIGHT?" "SERIOUSLY, GO AHEAD AND KISS ME." "IT'S OKAY." "SERIOUSLY, GO AHEAD AND KISS ME." "IT'S OKAY." "WHAT?" "IT'S OKAY." "WHAT?" "NO,REALLY." "WHAT?" "NO,REALLY." "GO AHEAD AND KISS ME." "NO,REALLY." "GO AHEAD AND KISS ME." "[Laughing]OKAY." "GO AHEAD AND KISS ME." "[Laughing]OKAY." "REALLY?" "[Laughing]OKAY." "REALLY?" "YOU WENT IN FOR IT?" "REALLY?" "YOU WENT IN FOR IT?" "YOU'RE GOING IN FOR IT?" "YOU WENT IN FOR IT?" "YOU'RE GOING IN FOR IT?" "SERIOUSLY, YOU WENT IN FOR IT?" "YOU'RE GOING IN FOR IT?" "SERIOUSLY, YOU WENT IN FOR IT?" "REALLY?" "SERIOUSLY, YOU WENT IN FOR IT?" "REALLY?" "NOBODY EVER GOES IN FOR IT." "REALLY?" "NOBODY EVER GOES IN FOR IT." "[LAUGHS]" "NOBODY EVER GOES IN FOR IT." "[LAUGHS] ISTHATWHATYOU THINKIDID ?" "[LAUGHS] ISTHATWHATYOU THINKIDID ?" "WENT AFTER YOUR GIRL?" "ISTHATWHATYOU THINKIDID ?" "WENT AFTER YOUR GIRL?" "HEY, DON'T LEAVE, JASON." "WENT AFTER YOUR GIRL?" "HEY, DON'T LEAVE, JASON." "TRICK'S NOT OVER YET." "THIS IS A CRIME SCENE, AND I DON'T WANT TO CONTAMINATE THE SCENE." "DON'T WANT TO CONTAMINATE THE SCENE." "SO, I'VE GOT AN IDEA, PEGGY." "SCENE." "SO, I'VE GOT AN IDEA, PEGGY." "KISS ME THROUGH THE GLASS." "SO, I'VE GOT AN IDEA, PEGGY." "KISS ME THROUGH THE GLASS." "GOOD IDEA, RIGHT?" "KISS ME THROUGH THE GLASS." "GOOD IDEA, RIGHT?" "YEAH." "GOOD IDEA, RIGHT?" "YEAH." "YOU'REOKAYWITHTHIS,RIGHT?" "YEAH." "YOU'REOKAYWITHTHIS,RIGHT?" "YEAH." "YOU'REOKAYWITHTHIS,RIGHT?" "YEAH." "YOU'RENOTGONNAGET JEALOUS," "YEAH." "YOU'RENOTGONNAGET JEALOUS, LIKE JASON, RIGHT?" "YOU'RENOTGONNAGET JEALOUS, LIKE JASON, RIGHT?" "GOOD." "LET'S DO THIS." "LIKE JASON, RIGHT?" "GOOD." "LET'S DO THIS." "OH, WE PROBABLY SHOULD CLEAN THE" "GOOD." "LET'S DO THIS." "OH, WE PROBABLY SHOULD CLEAN THE CRIME SCENE." "OH, WE PROBABLY SHOULD CLEAN THE CRIME SCENE." "DO ME A FAVOR." "CRIME SCENE." "DO ME A FAVOR." "PICK A WETNAP, ANY WETNAP." "DO ME A FAVOR." "PICK A WETNAP, ANY WETNAP." "IS THAT THE ONE YOU WANT, OR DO" "PICK A WETNAP, ANY WETNAP." "IS THAT THE ONE YOU WANT, OR DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR MIND?" "IS THAT THE ONE YOU WANT, OR DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR MIND?" "NO,THISIS GOOD." "YOU WANT TO CHANGE YOUR MIND?" "NO,THISIS GOOD." "BYTHEWAY,ONTHOSECSI" "NO,THISIS GOOD." "BYTHEWAY,ONTHOSECSI SHOWS AND IN REAL LIFE, THIS IS" "BYTHEWAY,ONTHOSECSI SHOWS AND IN REAL LIFE, THIS IS HOW THEY CLEAN CRIME SCENES." "SHOWS AND IN REAL LIFE, THIS IS HOW THEY CLEAN CRIME SCENES." "THEY USE WETNAPS." "HOW THEY CLEAN CRIME SCENES." "THEY USE WETNAPS." "IT'S TRUE." "THEY USE WETNAPS." "IT'S TRUE." "SO, KISS ME THROUGH THE GLASS." "IT'S TRUE." "SO, KISS ME THROUGH THE GLASS." "YOU JEALOUS, JASON?" "SO, KISS ME THROUGH THE GLASS." "YOU JEALOUS, JASON?" "WISH YOU WERE UP HERE, KISSING" "YOU JEALOUS, JASON?" "WISH YOU WERE UP HERE, KISSING PEGGY?" "WISH YOU WERE UP HERE, KISSING PEGGY?" "YOU JUST CAN'T BE HAPPY FOR ME," "PEGGY?" "YOU JUST CAN'T BE HAPPY FOR ME, HUH?" "YOU JUST CAN'T BE HAPPY FOR ME, HUH?" "YOU THINK I DON'T WORK HARD." "HUH?" "YOU THINK I DON'T WORK HARD." "YOU KNOW HOW HARD I WORKED TO" "YOU THINK I DON'T WORK HARD." "YOU KNOW HOW HARD I WORKED TO CREATE AN ACT THAT WOULD GET ME" "YOU KNOW HOW HARD I WORKED TO CREATE AN ACT THAT WOULD GET ME HIRED AND LAID AT THE SAME TIME?" "CREATE AN ACT THAT WOULD GET ME HIRED AND LAID AT THE SAME TIME?" "PEGGY, THROUGH THE GLASS." "HIRED AND LAID AT THE SAME TIME?" "PEGGY, THROUGH THE GLASS." "[LAUGHS]" "PEGGY, THROUGH THE GLASS." "[LAUGHS] OKAY, OKAY." "[LAUGHS] OKAY, OKAY." "AWESOME." "OKAY, OKAY." "AWESOME." "WOW!" "THERE IT IS." "AWESOME." "WOW!" "THERE IT IS." "LOOK." "LOOK UP THERE." "WOW!" "THERE IT IS." "LOOK." "LOOK UP THERE." "IT'S A BLACK CARD." "LOOK." "LOOK UP THERE." "IT'S A BLACK CARD." "IT'S A SPADE." "IT'S A BLACK CARD." "IT'S A SPADE." "IT'S THE 2 OF SPADES." "IT'S A SPADE." "IT'S THE 2 OF SPADES." "AM I RIGHT?" "IT'S THE 2 OF SPADES." "AM I RIGHT?" "YEAH." "AM I RIGHT?" "YEAH." "RIGHT." "MAGICWITHDNA ." "YEAH." "RIGHT." "MAGICWITHDNA ." "THANKS." "RIGHT." "MAGICWITHDNA ." "THANKS." "WHOA!" "THANKS." "WHOA!" "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ]" "WHOA!" "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ] HERE." "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ] HERE." "AS A PARTING GIFT, YOUR VERY OWN" "HERE." "AS A PARTING GIFT, YOUR VERY OWN WETNAP." "AS A PARTING GIFT, YOUR VERY OWN WETNAP." "TAKE ANYONE YOU WANT." "WETNAP." "TAKE ANYONE YOU WANT." "EXCUSEME." "TAKE ANYONE YOU WANT." "EXCUSEME." "HE'SLEAVING." "EXCUSEME." "HE'SLEAVING." "GUESS HE CAN'T HANDLE OTHER" "HE'SLEAVING." "GUESS HE CAN'T HANDLE OTHER PEOPLE'S SUCCESS." "GUESS HE CAN'T HANDLE OTHER PEOPLE'S SUCCESS." "WETNAP " " WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE" "PEOPLE'S SUCCESS." "WETNAP " " WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THE WHOLE DREAM." "WETNAP " " WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THE WHOLE DREAM." "[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]" "TIME FOR THE WHOLE DREAM." "[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] YOU'LL GET IT." "[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ] YOU'LL GET IT." "ALL RIGHT." "YOU'LL GET IT." "ALL RIGHT." "I WISH HE HADN'T LEFT, BECAUSE" "ALL RIGHT." "I WISH HE HADN'T LEFT, BECAUSE HE MISSED THE FACT THAT PEGGY" "I WISH HE HADN'T LEFT, BECAUSE HE MISSED THE FACT THAT PEGGY PICKED THE ONLY WETNAP THAT HAS" "HE MISSED THE FACT THAT PEGGY PICKED THE ONLY WETNAP THAT HAS A CARD INSIDE." "PICKED THE ONLY WETNAP THAT HAS A CARD INSIDE." "TAKE IT." "A CARD INSIDE." "TAKE IT." "OPEN IT UP." "TAKE IT." "OPEN IT UP." "DOES THAT HAVE YOUR DNA?" "OPEN IT UP." "DOES THAT HAVE YOUR DNA?" "[Laughing]YES ." "DOES THAT HAVE YOUR DNA?" "[Laughing]YES ." "SHOWTHEM." "[Laughing]YES ." "SHOWTHEM." "THAT'S PEGGY, EVERYBODY." "SHOWTHEM." "THAT'S PEGGY, EVERYBODY." "[ AUDIENCE APPLAUDS ]" "WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?" "YOU'RE MAD AT ME, FINE, BUT DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON ME HERE, IN" "YOU'RE MAD AT ME, FINE, BUT DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON ME HERE, IN FRONT OF MY PEERS." "DON'T TAKE IT OUT ON ME HERE, IN FRONT OF MY PEERS." ""THE AMAZING EJACULATOR"?" "FRONT OF MY PEERS." ""THE AMAZING EJACULATOR"?" "SERIOUSLY?" ""THE AMAZING EJACULATOR"?" "SERIOUSLY?" "I'VE NEVER PERFORMED SO ANGRY IN" "SERIOUSLY?" "I'VE NEVER PERFORMED SO ANGRY IN MY LIFE." "I'VE NEVER PERFORMED SO ANGRY IN MY LIFE." "AND THAT AUDIENCE HAS NO IDEA" "MY LIFE." "AND THAT AUDIENCE HAS NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON." "AND THAT AUDIENCE HAS NO IDEA WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON." "THEYSTILLENJOYEDIT." "WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON." "THEYSTILLENJOYEDIT." "IT WAS A GOOD SHOW." "THEYSTILLENJOYEDIT." "IT WAS A GOOD SHOW." "WHATEVER." "IT WAS A GOOD SHOW." "WHATEVER." "HEY,GOODSHOW" "REALLYFUN." "WHATEVER." "HEY,GOODSHOW" "REALLYFUN." "YOUWERETERRIFIC." "HEY,GOODSHOW" "REALLYFUN." "YOUWERETERRIFIC." "THATWASAREALLYFUNNYBIT" "YOUWERETERRIFIC." "THATWASAREALLYFUNNYBIT YOU GUYS HAD GOING ON THERE," "THATWASAREALLYFUNNYBIT YOU GUYS HAD GOING ON THERE, LIKE ABBOTT AND COSTELLO OR" "YOU GUYS HAD GOING ON THERE, LIKE ABBOTT AND COSTELLO OR SOMETHING." "LIKE ABBOTT AND COSTELLO OR SOMETHING." "THAT WAS A BIT, RIGHT?" "SOMETHING." "THAT WAS A BIT, RIGHT?" "YEAH." "THAT WAS A BIT, RIGHT?" "YEAH." "THANK YOU." "SEE?" "YOU TURN EVERY SITUATION INTO GOLD." "YOU TURN EVERY SITUATION INTO GOLD." "FOR ME, IT'S ALWAYS A DISASTER." "GOLD." "FOR ME, IT'S ALWAYS A DISASTER." "I CAN'T SEEM TO GET A BREAK." "FOR ME, IT'S ALWAYS A DISASTER." "I CAN'T SEEM TO GET A BREAK." "SHE'LLTURNUP ." "I CAN'T SEEM TO GET A BREAK." "SHE'LLTURNUP ." "DONKICKEDME OUTOFTHE" "SHE'LLTURNUP ." "DONKICKEDME OUTOFTHE SHOW." "DONKICKEDME OUTOFTHE SHOW." "HE WAS ONLY INTERESTED IN THE" "SHOW." "HE WAS ONLY INTERESTED IN THE ASSISTANT ACT, AND STACY MISSED" "HE WAS ONLY INTERESTED IN THE ASSISTANT ACT, AND STACY MISSED THE TECH REHEARSAL." "ASSISTANT ACT, AND STACY MISSED THE TECH REHEARSAL." "Wow." "THE TECH REHEARSAL." "Wow." "YEAH." "Wow." "YEAH." "YOUKNOW,IT 'SNOTMYFAULT." "YEAH." "YOUKNOW,IT 'SNOTMYFAULT." "I'M NOT HER KEEPER." "YOUKNOW,IT 'SNOTMYFAULT." "I'M NOT HER KEEPER." "WE WERE TRYING TO HELP YOU." "I'M NOT HER KEEPER." "WE WERE TRYING TO HELP YOU." "WE WERE BRAINSTORMING METHODS" "WE WERE TRYING TO HELP YOU." "WE WERE BRAINSTORMING METHODS FOR YOU COSTUME CHANGE." "WE WERE BRAINSTORMING METHODS FOR YOU COSTUME CHANGE." "YOUWANTTO HELPME?" "FOR YOU COSTUME CHANGE." "YOUWANTTO HELPME?" "YOU COME TALK TO ME, AND WE CAN" "YOUWANTTO HELPME?" "YOU COME TALK TO ME, AND WE CAN BRAINSTORM." "YOU COME TALK TO ME, AND WE CAN BRAINSTORM." "I KNOW WHAT I WANT FOR THIS ACT." "BRAINSTORM." "I KNOW WHAT I WANT FOR THIS ACT." "I WROTE IT." "I KNOW WHAT I WANT FOR THIS ACT." "I WROTE IT." "LOOK." "I WROTE IT." "LOOK." "I'VE BEEN VERY SUPPORTIVE WITH" "LOOK." "I'VE BEEN VERY SUPPORTIVE WITH YOU IN THIS ACT." "I'VE BEEN VERY SUPPORTIVE WITH YOU IN THIS ACT." "I WAS VERY PROUD OF YOU THAT YOU" "YOU IN THIS ACT." "I WAS VERY PROUD OF YOU THAT YOU WERE COMPETING." "I WAS VERY PROUD OF YOU THAT YOU WERE COMPETING." "IDON'TWANTYOU TOBEPROUD" "WERE COMPETING." "IDON'TWANTYOU TOBEPROUD  OF ME." "IDON'TWANTYOU TOBEPROUD  OF ME." "DON'T YOU SEE HOW THAT PUTS ME" "OF ME." "DON'T YOU SEE HOW THAT PUTS ME LOWER THAN YOU?" "DON'T YOU SEE HOW THAT PUTS ME LOWER THAN YOU?" "YOU'RE NOT PROUD OF A PEER." "LOWER THAN YOU?" "YOU'RE NOT PROUD OF A PEER." "YOU'RE PROUD OF A CHILD OR A" "YOU'RE NOT PROUD OF A PEER." "YOU'RE PROUD OF A CHILD OR A STUDENT." "YOU'RE PROUD OF A CHILD OR A STUDENT." "I'M NOT YOUR STUDENT." "STUDENT." "I'M NOT YOUR STUDENT." "OKAY." "I'M NOT YOUR STUDENT." "OKAY." "LET'S TALK TO DON." "OKAY." "LET'S TALK TO DON." "IT'STOOLATE." "LET'S TALK TO DON." "IT'STOOLATE." "NOWAY." "IT'STOOLATE." "NOWAY." "TECH REHEARSAL ALWAYS RUNS LATE." "NOWAY." "TECH REHEARSAL ALWAYS RUNS LATE." "AND IF STACY WON'T HELP YOU WITH" "TECH REHEARSAL ALWAYS RUNS LATE." "AND IF STACY WON'T HELP YOU WITH THE ACT, I WILL." "AND IF STACY WON'T HELP YOU WITH THE ACT, I WILL." "Y-YOU'LLBETHEASSISTANT?" "THE ACT, I WILL." "Y-YOU'LLBETHEASSISTANT?" "LIKEABBOTTANDCOSTELLO..." "Y-YOU'LLBETHEASSISTANT?" "LIKEABBOTTANDCOSTELLO..." "IF THEY WERE GAY." "COMEON." "AROUND TO THE STAGE DOORS." "IKNOWTHAT." "YOUFINDYOURASSISTANT?" "I'M,UH,I'MGONNAFILL IN." "OH,COMEON ." "I'M,UH,I'MGONNAFILL IN." "OH,COMEON ." "DON'T WASTE MY TIME." "OH,COMEON ." "DON'T WASTE MY TIME." "WHYCAN'TIHAVEAMALE" "DON'T WASTE MY TIME." "WHYCAN'TIHAVEAMALE ASSISTANT?" "WHYCAN'TIHAVEAMALE ASSISTANT?" "YOUCANHAVEANY ASSISTANT" "ASSISTANT?" "YOUCANHAVEANY ASSISTANT YOU WANT." "YOUCANHAVEANY ASSISTANT YOU WANT." "I DON'T CARE." "YOU WANT." "I DON'T CARE." "BUT WE LIKED YOUR ACT THE WAY WE" "I DON'T CARE." "BUT WE LIKED YOUR ACT THE WAY WE SAW IT, WITH A GIRL, AND SHE'S" "BUT WE LIKED YOUR ACT THE WAY WE SAW IT, WITH A GIRL, AND SHE'S UPSET, AND YOU MAKE UP, AND YOU" "SAW IT, WITH A GIRL, AND SHE'S UPSET, AND YOU MAKE UP, AND YOU KISS." "UPSET, AND YOU MAKE UP, AND YOU KISS." "THE TWO OF YOU DO THAT?" "KISS." "THE TWO OF YOU DO THAT?" "IT'S A FAMILY SHOW." "THE TWO OF YOU DO THAT?" "IT'S A FAMILY SHOW." "WHAT,YOUDON'TTHINKICAN" "IT'S A FAMILY SHOW." "WHAT,YOUDON'TTHINKICAN  PLAY A SEXY ASSISTANT?" "WHAT,YOUDON'TTHINKICAN  PLAY A SEXY ASSISTANT?" "NO!" "PLAY A SEXY ASSISTANT?" "NO!" "HOWABOUTNOW?" "NO!" "HOWABOUTNOW?" "[LAUGHS]" "HOWABOUTNOW?" "[LAUGHS] LOOK." "[LAUGHS] LOOK." "I CAN'T HAVE AN UNKNOWN TALENT" "LOOK." "I CAN'T HAVE AN UNKNOWN TALENT DOING AN UNKNOWN ACT." "I CAN'T HAVE AN UNKNOWN TALENT DOING AN UNKNOWN ACT." "STEVE, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE HIS" "DOING AN UNKNOWN ACT." "STEVE, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE HIS SLOT?" "STEVE, WHY DON'T YOU TAKE HIS SLOT?" "I COULD USE SOME COMEDY." "SLOT?" "I COULD USE SOME COMEDY." "NO,YOU'REMAKINGAMISTAKE." "I COULD USE SOME COMEDY." "NO,YOU'REMAKINGAMISTAKE." "HE'S GOT CHOPS." "NO,YOU'REMAKINGAMISTAKE." "HE'S GOT CHOPS." "HE'S AS GOOD AS ME." "HE'S GOT CHOPS." "HE'S AS GOOD AS ME." "AND HIS NEW ACT?" "HE'S AS GOOD AS ME." "AND HIS NEW ACT?" "IT'LL BLOW YOU AWAY." "AND HIS NEW ACT?" "IT'LL BLOW YOU AWAY." "YOU'VESEENIT ?" "IT'LL BLOW YOU AWAY." "YOU'VESEENIT ?" "WELL,NO,BUTIKNOW IT'S GOT" "YOU'VESEENIT ?" "WELL,NO,BUTIKNOW IT'S GOT A LOT OF ROPE." "WELL,NO,BUTIKNOW IT'S GOT A LOT OF ROPE." "WE'VEALLFELTTRAPPEDATONE" "A LOT OF ROPE." "WE'VEALLFELTTRAPPEDATONE TIME OR ANOTHER." "WE'VEALLFELTTRAPPEDATONE TIME OR ANOTHER." "TRAPPED BY A JOB WE THOUGHT WE" "TIME OR ANOTHER." "TRAPPED BY A JOB WE THOUGHT WE COULDN'T ESCAPE, A BAD" "TRAPPED BY A JOB WE THOUGHT WE COULDN'T ESCAPE, A BAD RELATIONSHIP, A REPUTATION THAT" "COULDN'T ESCAPE, A BAD RELATIONSHIP, A REPUTATION THAT WE COULD NO LONGER LIVE UP TO..." "RELATIONSHIP, A REPUTATION THAT WE COULD NO LONGER LIVE UP TO..." "OR ONE THAT WE COULD NOT SHAKE" "WE COULD NO LONGER LIVE UP TO..." "OR ONE THAT WE COULD NOT SHAKE OFF." "OR ONE THAT WE COULD NOT SHAKE OFF." "[ GROANING ]" "[ GROANING INTENSIFIES ]" "WHO IS IN SEAT I-17?" "RIGHTHERE." "SIR,WHILEDONTIEDMEUP ," "RIGHTHERE." "SIR,WHILEDONTIEDMEUP , YOU WROTE DOWN A WAY THAT YOU" "SIR,WHILEDONTIEDMEUP , YOU WROTE DOWN A WAY THAT YOU FELT TRAPPED." "YOU WROTE DOWN A WAY THAT YOU FELT TRAPPED." "THERE'S NO WAY THAT I COULD KNOW" "FELT TRAPPED." "THERE'S NO WAY THAT I COULD KNOW WHAT'S WRITTEN ON YOUR PAPER." "THERE'S NO WAY THAT I COULD KNOW WHAT'S WRITTEN ON YOUR PAPER." "IS THAT CORRECT?" "WHAT'S WRITTEN ON YOUR PAPER." "IS THAT CORRECT?" "YEAH." "IS THAT CORRECT?" "YEAH." "IWANTYOUTOTHINKABOUT" "YEAH." "IWANTYOUTOTHINKABOUT  WHAT YOU WROTE." "IWANTYOUTOTHINKABOUT  WHAT YOU WROTE." "CONCENTRATE." "WHAT YOU WROTE." "CONCENTRATE." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE." "CONCENTRATE." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE." "I AM GETTING AN IMAGE OF BRIEFS." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE." "I AM GETTING AN IMAGE OF BRIEFS." "YOU FEEL TRAPPED BY" "I AM GETTING AN IMAGE OF BRIEFS." "YOU FEEL TRAPPED BY TIGHT-FITTING UNDERWEAR." "YOU FEEL TRAPPED BY TIGHT-FITTING UNDERWEAR." "IS THAT CORRECT?" "TIGHT-FITTING UNDERWEAR." "IS THAT CORRECT?" "YEAH,THAT'SRIGHT." "IS THAT CORRECT?" "YEAH,THAT'SRIGHT." "ANDYOURWIFEGAVEYOUTHAT" "YEAH,THAT'SRIGHT." "ANDYOURWIFEGAVEYOUTHAT UNDERWEAR ON YOUR BIRTHDAY." "ANDYOURWIFEGAVEYOUTHAT UNDERWEAR ON YOUR BIRTHDAY." "IDIDN'TEVENWRITETHAT ." "UNDERWEAR ON YOUR BIRTHDAY." "IDIDN'TEVENWRITETHAT ." "ANDTHEPATTERNONTHEBRIEFS" "IDIDN'TEVENWRITETHAT ." "ANDTHEPATTERNONTHEBRIEFS IS LITTLE RED HEARTS." "ANDTHEPATTERNONTHEBRIEFS IS LITTLE RED HEARTS." "IS THAT RIGHT?" "IS LITTLE RED HEARTS." "IS THAT RIGHT?" "[LAUGHS]" "IS THAT RIGHT?" "[LAUGHS] LOOK." "[LAUGHS] LOOK." "THERE'S NO WAY YOU COULD HAVE" "LOOK." "THERE'S NO WAY YOU COULD HAVE KNOWN THAT." "THERE'S NO WAY YOU COULD HAVE KNOWN THAT." "WHOISIN SEATK-15?" "KNOWN THAT." "WHOISIN SEATK-15?" "THAT'SME." "WHOISIN SEATK-15?" "THAT'SME." "SIR,THINKABOUTWHATYOU" "THAT'SME." "SIR,THINKABOUTWHATYOU WROTE." "SIR,THINKABOUTWHATYOU WROTE." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE." "WROTE." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE OF YOU" "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE." "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE OF YOU RELAXING AND HAVING DINNER" "I'M GETTING AN IMAGE OF YOU RELAXING AND HAVING DINNER BEFORE THE SHOW, 'CAUSE YOU FEEL" "RELAXING AND HAVING DINNER BEFORE THE SHOW, 'CAUSE YOU FEEL TRAPPED IN THIS THEATER BECAUSE" "BEFORE THE SHOW, 'CAUSE YOU FEEL TRAPPED IN THIS THEATER BECAUSE THIS TECH REHEARSAL WILL NEVER" "TRAPPED IN THIS THEATER BECAUSE THIS TECH REHEARSAL WILL NEVER END." "THIS TECH REHEARSAL WILL NEVER END." "IS THAT RIGHT?" "END." "IS THAT RIGHT?" "WORDFORWORD." "IS THAT RIGHT?" "WORDFORWORD." "WELL,THISTECHREHEARSALIS" "WORDFORWORD." "WELL,THISTECHREHEARSALIS OVER!" "WELL,THISTECHREHEARSALIS OVER!" "'CAUSE I WILL SEE YOU TONIGHT!" "OVER!" "'CAUSE I WILL SEE YOU TONIGHT!" "NOWWAITAMINUTE." "'CAUSE I WILL SEE YOU TONIGHT!" "NOWWAITAMINUTE." "WHAT ABOUT ME?" "NOWWAITAMINUTE." "WHAT ABOUT ME?" "YOU PUT IN AN ENVELOPE?" "WHAT ABOUT ME?" "YOU PUT IN AN ENVELOPE?" "NO." "YOU PUT IN AN ENVELOPE?" "NO." "BUT I WROTE IT DOWN RIGHT HERE." "NO." "BUT I WROTE IT DOWN RIGHT HERE." "NOW, IF YOU CAN TELL ME WHY I" "BUT I WROTE IT DOWN RIGHT HERE." "NOW, IF YOU CAN TELL ME WHY I FEEL TRAPPED HERE, NOW, THAT" "NOW, IF YOU CAN TELL ME WHY I FEEL TRAPPED HERE, NOW, THAT WOULD BE A DAMN GOOD TRICK." "FEEL TRAPPED HERE, NOW, THAT WOULD BE A DAMN GOOD TRICK." "YES,ITWOULD." "WOULD BE A DAMN GOOD TRICK." "YES,ITWOULD." "IT CERTAINLY WOULD." "YES,ITWOULD." "IT CERTAINLY WOULD." "THISISN'THOWTHE TRICKIS" "IT CERTAINLY WOULD." "THISISN'THOWTHE TRICKIS SUPPOSED TO GO." "THISISN'THOWTHE TRICKIS SUPPOSED TO GO." "IKNOW." "SUPPOSED TO GO." "IKNOW." "IT'S A PRETTY GOOD ACT, BUT YOU" "IKNOW." "IT'S A PRETTY GOOD ACT, BUT YOU SAID I'D BE BLOWN AWAY, AND" "IT'S A PRETTY GOOD ACT, BUT YOU SAID I'D BE BLOWN AWAY, AND THAT HASN'T HAPPENED YET." "SAID I'D BE BLOWN AWAY, AND THAT HASN'T HAPPENED YET." "GIVETHEGUYABREAK." "THAT HASN'T HAPPENED YET." "GIVETHEGUYABREAK." "HE KNEW WHAT PATTERN MY" "GIVETHEGUYABREAK." "HE KNEW WHAT PATTERN MY UNDERWEAR WAS." "HE KNEW WHAT PATTERN MY UNDERWEAR WAS." "HECOULDHAVESEENYOUINTHE" "UNDERWEAR WAS." "HECOULDHAVESEENYOUINTHE  BATHROOM." "HECOULDHAVESEENYOUINTHE  BATHROOM." "IT'S NO BIG DEAL." "BATHROOM." "IT'S NO BIG DEAL." "OOH,LOOKAT ME !" "IT'S NO BIG DEAL." "OOH,LOOKAT ME !" "ANOTHER BIG ENTRANCE." "OOH,LOOKAT ME !" "ANOTHER BIG ENTRANCE." "NICE LEGS." "ANOTHER BIG ENTRANCE." "NICE LEGS." "WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN?" "NICE LEGS." "WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN?" "SAVINGYOURACT." "WHEREHAVEYOUBEEN?" "SAVINGYOURACT." "SHE'SNOTGOINGONMY" "SAVINGYOURACT." "SHE'SNOTGOINGONMY STAGE " " NO WAY." "SHE'SNOTGOINGONMY STAGE " " NO WAY." "DON'TWORRY,DON." "STAGE " " NO WAY." "DON'TWORRY,DON." "I'M DOING THE NEW ACT." "DON'TWORRY,DON." "I'M DOING THE NEW ACT." "IT'S A SOLO ACT." "I'M DOING THE NEW ACT." "IT'S A SOLO ACT." "WHAT?" "!" "IT'S A SOLO ACT." "WHAT?" "!" "OUT OF MY WAY, MERLIN." "THOUGHT YOU WANTED A PARTNER." "PARTNER?" "YOU WANT TO BE MY PARTNER, BUT" "PARTNER?" "YOU WANT TO BE MY PARTNER, BUT YET YOU SNEAK OUT IN THE MIDDLE" "YOU WANT TO BE MY PARTNER, BUT YET YOU SNEAK OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?" "YET YOU SNEAK OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?" "YOUWERESLEEPING." "OF THE NIGHT?" "YOUWERESLEEPING." "YOU GOT ME ALL EXCITED." "YOUWERESLEEPING." "YOU GOT ME ALL EXCITED." "MY HEAD WAS SPINNING." "YOU GOT ME ALL EXCITED." "MY HEAD WAS SPINNING." "BUTYOUHADALREADYMADE A" "MY HEAD WAS SPINNING." "BUTYOUHADALREADYMADE A PLAN TO MEET." "BUTYOUHADALREADYMADE A PLAN TO MEET." "YOU KNEW YOU WERE GOING OUT, AND" "PLAN TO MEET." "YOU KNEW YOU WERE GOING OUT, AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME." "YOU KNEW YOU WERE GOING OUT, AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME." "THEREARETHINGSTHATICAN 'T" "YOU DIDN'T TELL ME." "THEREARETHINGSTHATICAN 'T SAY TO YOU." "THEREARETHINGSTHATICAN 'T SAY TO YOU." "I'M NOT A GOOD PERSON LIKE YOU" "SAY TO YOU." "I'M NOT A GOOD PERSON LIKE YOU ARE, AND I COULD TELL THAT STEVE" "I'M NOT A GOOD PERSON LIKE YOU ARE, AND I COULD TELL THAT STEVE WAS A SCUMBAG, TOO." "ARE, AND I COULD TELL THAT STEVE WAS A SCUMBAG, TOO." "WHAT?" "WHAT?" "WAS A SCUMBAG, TOO." "WHAT?" "WHAT?" "LOOK." "I 'MDONEHERE." "WHAT?" "WHAT?" "LOOK." "I 'MDONEHERE." "JUSTWAITAMINUTE." "LOOK." "I 'MDONEHERE." "JUSTWAITAMINUTE." "IF YOU CAN'T SAY THOSE THINGS," "JUSTWAITAMINUTE." "IF YOU CAN'T SAY THOSE THINGS, HOW CAN WE BE TOGETHER?" "IF YOU CAN'T SAY THOSE THINGS, HOW CAN WE BE TOGETHER?" "[SIGHS]" "HOW CAN WE BE TOGETHER?" "[SIGHS] WHEN I WAS WITH NATHAN," "[SIGHS] WHEN I WAS WITH NATHAN, EVERYBODY ALWAYS THOUGHT OF ME" "WHEN I WAS WITH NATHAN, EVERYBODY ALWAYS THOUGHT OF ME AS NATHAN BURTON'S GIRLFRIEND." "EVERYBODY ALWAYS THOUGHT OF ME AS NATHAN BURTON'S GIRLFRIEND." "EVEN WHEN I HAD MY OWN SHOW," "AS NATHAN BURTON'S GIRLFRIEND." "EVEN WHEN I HAD MY OWN SHOW, NOBODY TOOK ME SERIOUSLY." "EVEN WHEN I HAD MY OWN SHOW, NOBODY TOOK ME SERIOUSLY." "BUT THEN, I TALKED TO STEVE, AND" "NOBODY TOOK ME SERIOUSLY." "BUT THEN, I TALKED TO STEVE, AND HE SAID NO ONE TAKES YOU" "BUT THEN, I TALKED TO STEVE, AND HE SAID NO ONE TAKES YOU SERIOUSLY, EITHER." "HE SAID NO ONE TAKES YOU SERIOUSLY, EITHER." "SO, THAT MADE ME FEEL BETTER." "SERIOUSLY, EITHER." "SO, THAT MADE ME FEEL BETTER." "I THOUGHT MAYBE WE COULD" "SO, THAT MADE ME FEEL BETTER." "I THOUGHT MAYBE WE COULD STRUGGLE TOGETHER." "IT'S DON'S." "I'VEDECIDEDTO DO THE ASSISTANT ACT WITH STACY." "I'VEDECIDEDTO DO THE ASSISTANT ACT WITH STACY." "NOWAY" " THAT'SNOT GONNA" "ASSISTANT ACT WITH STACY." "NOWAY" " THAT'SNOT GONNA HAPPEN." "NOWAY" " THAT'SNOT GONNA HAPPEN." "I'LLTELLYOUWHAT'SONYOUR" "HAPPEN." "I'LLTELLYOUWHAT'SONYOUR PAPER, AND YOU LET US DO THE" "I'LLTELLYOUWHAT'SONYOUR PAPER, AND YOU LET US DO THE ACT." "ALLRIGHT,YOUHAVEADEAL." "BEFOREI STARTEDTHEACT ,I PLACED A PIECE OF PAPER INTO MY" "BEFOREI STARTEDTHEACT ,I PLACED A PIECE OF PAPER INTO MY WALLET, A PREDICTION, IF YOU" "PLACED A PIECE OF PAPER INTO MY WALLET, A PREDICTION, IF YOU WILL." "WALLET, A PREDICTION, IF YOU WILL." "AND WRITTEN ON THAT PAPER..." "WILL." "AND WRITTEN ON THAT PAPER..." "SAYS, "I FEEL TRAPPED BY A" "AND WRITTEN ON THAT PAPER..." "SAYS, "I FEEL TRAPPED BY A 100-YEAR-OLD MAGIC ORGANIZATION" "SAYS, "I FEEL TRAPPED BY A 100-YEAR-OLD MAGIC ORGANIZATION RESISTANT TO CHANGE."" "100-YEAR-OLD MAGIC ORGANIZATION RESISTANT TO CHANGE." WOW." "RESISTANT TO CHANGE." WOW." "ALL RIGHT, BUT WHAT I WROTE," "WOW." "ALL RIGHT, BUT WHAT I WROTE, THAT DOES NOT LEAVE THIS ROOM." "ALL RIGHT, BUT WHAT I WROTE, THAT DOES NOT LEAVE THIS ROOM." "DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" "THAT DOES NOT LEAVE THIS ROOM." "DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" "SURE." "DO YOU UNDERSTAND?" "SURE." "YOU WANT YOUR WALLET BACK?" "I'MTIREDOF GOING"OOH"AND "AHH" EVERY TIME YOU DO A TRICK." "I FEEL LIKE I'M IN SOME KIND OF" ""AHH" EVERY TIME YOU DO A TRICK." "I FEEL LIKE I'M IN SOME KIND OF PORNO MOVIE." "I FEEL LIKE I'M IN SOME KIND OF PORNO MOVIE." "OKAY." "PORNO MOVIE." "OKAY." "ANDLOOKAT THEWAY I'M" "OKAY." "ANDLOOKAT THEWAY I'M  DRESSED!" "ANDLOOKAT THEWAY I'M  DRESSED!" "I MEAN, DO YOU SEE A POOL" "DRESSED!" "I MEAN, DO YOU SEE A POOL AROUND HERE?" "I MEAN, DO YOU SEE A POOL AROUND HERE?" "I'M COLD!" "AROUND HERE?" "I'M COLD!" "HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU HAD TO" "I'M COLD!" "HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU HAD TO WEAR AN OUTFIT LIKE THIS?" "HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU HAD TO WEAR AN OUTFIT LIKE THIS?" "[ AUDIENCE LAUGHS ]" "FROM NOW ON, WE DO THE ACT TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL." "STACY,WHAT'STHISONYOUR" "TOGETHER OR NOT AT ALL." "STACY,WHAT'STHISONYOUR  LEG?" "!" "STACY,WHAT'STHISONYOUR  LEG?" "!" "IT'S PAUL'S WATCH." "LEG?" "!" "IT'S PAUL'S WATCH." "PAUL,DOYOUWANTTOCOMEUP" "IT'S PAUL'S WATCH." "PAUL,DOYOUWANTTOCOMEUP HERE AND GET YOUR WATCH?" "PAUL,DOYOUWANTTOCOMEUP HERE AND GET YOUR WATCH?" "HEY,WATCHIT ,BUDDY." "Both:" "THANKYOUVERYMUCH ." "THECOSTUMESWEREAHUGE HIT." "THEYWEREALSOSTOLEN." "The cops!" "THEYWEREALSOSTOLEN." "The cops!" "JUST WALK VERY SLOWLY." "The cops!" "JUST WALK VERY SLOWLY." "THEN, WHEN WE'RE GETTING OFF" "JUST WALK VERY SLOWLY." "THEN, WHEN WE'RE GETTING OFF STAGE..." "THEN, WHEN WE'RE GETTING OFF STAGE..." "RUN." "STAGE..." "RUN." "[ SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYS ]" "[ ROCK MUSIC PLAYS ]" "♪THUMBTIP,HANDKERCHIEF, WATCH IT DISAPPEAR ♪" "WATCH IT DISAPPEAR ♪ ♪ ARE YOU READY?" "♪ ARE YOU READY?" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC ♪ FLASH BIB, A FLAME" "♪ FLASH BIB, A FLAME ♪ NOW YOU SEE IT," "♪ NOW YOU SEE IT, NOW YOU DON'T ♪" "NOW YOU DON'T ♪ ♪ ARE YOU READY?" "♪ ARE YOU READY?" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC ♪ EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG" "♪ EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG ♪ NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO," "♪ NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, I'M ALWAYS" "I'M ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD OF YOU ♪" "ONE STEP AHEAD OF YOU ♪ ♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC," "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC, FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS," "FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS, FRYING ALL YOUR BRAINS" "FRYING ALL YOUR BRAINS WITH MY PRESTIDIGITATION ♪" "WITH MY PRESTIDIGITATION ♪ ♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC," "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC, THE SLEIGHT OF HAND ♪" "THE SLEIGHT OF HAND ♪ ♪ YOU LOOK AWAY, AND IT'S GONE" "♪ YOU LOOK AWAY, AND IT'S GONE ♪ STACKED DECK, DOUBLE-BACK," "♪ STACKED DECK, DOUBLE-BACK, POCKETFUL OF COINS ♪" "POCKETFUL OF COINS ♪ ♪ AND I'M READY" "♪ AND I'M READY ♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC ♪ SPONGE BALLS, MAGIC THREAD," "♪ SPONGE BALLS, MAGIC THREAD, NOW I'M IN YOUR HEAD ♪" "NOW I'M IN YOUR HEAD ♪ ♪ ARE YOU READY?" "♪ ARE YOU READY?" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC ♪ EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG" "♪ EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG ♪ NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY," "♪ NO MATTER WHAT YOU SAY, I'M ALWAYS HIP" "I'M ALWAYS HIP TO THE GAMES YOU PLAY ♪" "TO THE GAMES YOU PLAY ♪ ♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC" "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS," "FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS, FRYING ALL YOUR BRAINS" "FRYING ALL YOUR BRAINS WITH MY PRESTIDIGITATION ♪" "WITH MY PRESTIDIGITATION ♪ ♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC," "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC, THE SLEIGHT OF HAND ♪" "THE SLEIGHT OF HAND ♪ ♪ YOU LOOK AWAY, AND IT'S GONE" "♪ YOU LOOK AWAY, AND IT'S GONE ♪ LONG GONE" "♪ LONG GONE ♪ AND NOTHING UP MY SLEEVE" "♪ AND NOTHING UP MY SLEEVE ♪ CAN YOU BELIEVE" "♪ CAN YOU BELIEVE I FOOLED YOU, FOOLED YOU?" "♪" "I FOOLED YOU, FOOLED YOU?" "♪ ♪ I FEEL THE MAGIC" "♪ I FEEL THE MAGIC ♪ HOLD IT IN MY HANDS" "♪ HOLD IT IN MY HANDS ♪ TRY TO UNDERSTAND" "♪ TRY TO UNDERSTAND ♪ TRY TO UNDERSTAND" "♪ TRY TO UNDERSTAND ♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC," "♪ HERE COMES THE MAGIC, FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS," "FLOWING THROUGH MY VEINS, FRYING ALL YOUR BRAINS" "FRYING ALL YOUR BRAINS WITH MY PRESTIDIGITATION ♪"