" ♪" " [doorbell rings]" " KIDS:" "Trick or treat!" " Nice try, guys, but you can't trick or treat your own house." " Why not?" " It's in the Halloween bylaws." "That's why." " Oh, sounds like someone wants his house egged." " Sounds like someone wants to spend tomorrow cleaning eggs." " Oh, touché." "Anyway, let's get to the important stuff." "Look at this haul!" "And best of all... no apples!" " Oh, I got a rock." "Oh, wait, no, it's a candy bar that fell out of its wrapper." "[teeth chomp]" "Oh, no, it's a rock." " Dave, it's a new record... thanks in large part to Miss Kroner." " Oh, don't tell me you took advantage of her again." " Dave, it's not like it's my fault she's got a bad memory." " [doorbell rings]" " KIDS:" "Trick or treat!" " Why are you at my house?" "I have nothing here you could possibly want." " Just some Halloween candy, 'cause that's the day it is." " Oh, yes, of course." "Why didn't you say so?" " KIDS:" "Thank you!" " And a second helping of trick or treat in three... two... one." " [doorbell rings]" " KIDS:" "Trick or treat!" " Why are you at my house?" " Are you sure she's not tricking you?" " Oh, please, Dave." " Oh, I feel bad." " Yeah, bad enough not to eat the candy?" " No." " MAN ON TV:" "Stay with me or the werewolves outside will get you." " THEODORE: [gasps]" " MAN ON TV: [evil laughter]" " Too scary." " But, Dave, it's Halloween, and in ancient Greek, Halloween means scary is good." " No, it doesn't." "Okay, now, come on, off to bed." " Oh, we never get to do anything scary." "Theodore, stop worrying." "No one's going to take your candy." " I'm not worried about you guys." "I'm worried about the Switch Witch." " [electricity zapping]" " The who?" "The what?" " You know... ♪ Switch Witch" "♪ She's gonna come" "♪ She's gonna come" "♪ For your candy" " I've never heard of her." " The Switch Witch." "She switches all the candy you get for Halloween with books and fruit." " What?" "!" " Theodore, there's no Switch Witch." "Hey!" " Ow!" " Dave said no candy till morning." " I was merely looking for rocks." " [birds twittering]" " Yes!" " Oh!" "Let the great candy trade begin!" " ALL:" "What?" " Books and fruit?" "[gasps]" " Guys, someone took all our candies and replaced them with..." " We know!" " ALL: [chattering]" " Order!" "Order!" " [duck squeaks]" " Order!" " Oh!" " Listen up, people." "All right, now obviously we've all been victims of a terrible crime." "Now when candy is taken away from you, in just the moment you can taste it in your little mouth, well, it's not a feeling any of us will soon forget." "But we must turn our attention to the culprit." " [door knob rattling]" " It's the Switch Witch." " Hey, what's goin' on down here?" " Here's a question:" "What are you eating?" " Oh, he's eating candy." " Where'd you get the candy, Dave?" " Yeah, 'cause I had candy just like that." " [gasps] Maybe the Switch Witch has switched with Dave's body." " Guys, stop, okay?" "This was left over from the candy" "I handed out to the trick or treaters." " KIDS: [gasping] There's more candy?" " [gasping]" " No!" " Books and fruit again?" "Dave, this is going to go a lot easier for you, if you'd just tell us the truth." "What did you and the Switch Witch do with our candy?" " I don't know what you're talking about." "I'll be upstairs." " Okay, now, we know for sure there's a Switch Witch." "We just don't know who." " Well, then, there's only one thing we need." " Epsom salts and sauerkraut?" " Uh, no." " Epsom salts and sauerkraut?" "Jeanette, name one instance where those two things would be at all helpful." " Guys, guys, come on, focus." "We need to catch a witch and how do we do that?" "We trap her..." "with a witch trap." " All right, guys, so, gather everything you think will attract a witch." "That way, we bring the witch to us." " ♪ Come out come out wherever you are ♪" "♪ Why do you run from me" "♪ And take what you want from me ♪" "♪ You got me chasing you around and around ♪" "♪ Yeah" "♪ I don't know what to do" "♪ I just wanna be with you" "♪ Oh what will happen" "♪ Are they bad things or... ♪ I don't know, I don't know" "♪ But maybe you know" "♪ I don't know, I don't know" "♪ But maybe you know" " [crow cawing]" " Possible witch approaching." "I repeat, a possible witch approaching." " Nope." "No." "That would be Cheesy, Theodore." " I cannot confirm that at this moment." " Theodore, it's definitely Cheesy." " He's approaching the witch trap." "On three, two..." " Oh, sweet, sauerkraut and Epsom salts." "These are like my favorite things." "Hey, is this a garage sale?" " Cheesy, get off our lawn." " Can I take the Epsom salts and sauerkraut?" " Uh, no." " It's not for you." " Oh, okay." "I guess I'll just take the candy." "Bye, losers!" " [foot thuds]" " Oh!" "Oh." "Oh." " I don't think it's working." "Not one witch." " Looking for witches, are you?" " KIDS: [scream]" " You might want to try check in on old Miss Miller." " [gasping] Miss Miller?" " Why look so surprised?" "In the meanwhile, I'll help myself to the Epsom salts and sauerkraut." " Hey, hey, wait." "Hold on a second." "Why did you say Miss Miller?" "Why did she say Miss Miller?" " ♪ Come over to my house my house ♪" "♪ I'm gonna give you candy" " KIDS:" "Nah." " ♪ Come over to my house, my house ♪" "♪ I'm gonna give you candy" " KIDS:" "Nah." " She's not the Switch Witch." " But why would Miss Kroner tell us to look at Miss Miller, when clearly she's not the Switch Witch?" " To deflect us." " Yes." "Yes, exactly." "We must have been getting too close and she knew it." "Oh, she's the witch." " But we don't have a shred of proof." " [apple thuds]" " [gasps] It's a sign from Paul Newman." " It's not Paul Newman, Alvin, it's Isaac Newton." " Oh, whatever." " [apple thuds]" " If she already had the candy, then why would she..." " Simon, to throw us off the track." "I mean, do I have to lay everything out for you on a silver platter?" "Well, I don't know about the rest of you, but I, for one, am not going to stand for this." "Listen, go up there and demand she return our candy." " Uh... no." " All right, fine." "Theodore, you go get it." " [gasps] No." " All right, Simon, you know, show him how to do it, would you?" " Uh, well, Alvin, since you're not going to Stanford, you should go." " Oh, fine." "It looks like it's up to me... again." " ♪" " [step creaks]" " ♪" " THEODORE: [screams] [muffled screaming]" " Switch Witch." "I'm going to come..." "I'm going to come... for your candy." "[cackling laughter] [laughter echoing]" " I told you guys she's the Switch Witch." "She's obviously headed to our candy stash." "Come on, let's follow her." " Into the woods?" " What choice do we have?" " Yeah, we've gotta get our candy back." " ♪" " [owl hooting]" " [creature howling]" " [bird screeching]" " KIDS: [gasp]" " Look!" " Oh, okay." "Well, I'm ready to go home now." "I'm trying to eat healthier anyway." "I don't even like candy that much." " KIDS:" "Yeah, we're good." "Let's go." " Yeah, yeah, candy is really overrated." " All right, guys, now let's..." "let's, you know, get a little backbone here." "If we all go together, as a team, we'll be fine." " Against the Switch Witch?" "Are you crazy?" " Look, Simon, we're on a very slippery slope here." "You know, I mean, one day, it's our candy, the next, it's our bikes." "I say it ends here." " He's right." " ♪" " [doorknob squeaking]" " KIDS: [gasping]" " No!" "No!" " Put it back!" " I'm sorry." "I'm trying." " [door creaks open]" " Who goes there?" " Um, no... nobody." " What do you mean "nobody"?" " W-We just w-want our c-c-candy." " Just... just some of it." "Like, uh, maybe half?" " Oh, you do, do you?" " KIDS: [scream]" " Well, let me tell you what I have to say to that!" " [Dave's body thuds]" " KIDS: [screaming]" " Well, you said you wanted Halloween to be more scary." " [light switch clicks]" " Here you go." " KIDS: [gasping]" " MISS KRONER:" "I guess you can't have Halloween without a little candy." "But if you really want a treat, read those books!" " KIDS: [chattering]" " I've always wanted to jump into a pile of candy." "Oh!" "I'm okay." "I was just kidding when I said I didn't love candy." "Oh, I love it so much." " Dave, that was the most amazing Halloween trick ever." " Thanks, Alvin." " But, but, Dave, next year, we should, you know, amp it up." "I'll help you really scare these guys." "You know, like scar them for life kinda stuff." " Uh, no, no, Alvin." "You know, I really don't..." " Dave, Dave, trust me." "We've gotta bring in some crazy clowns and... and then we'll..." " Alvin." " But, Dave, have you ever seen "Halloween Horror"" "or... or "It's Coming For You"?" " DAVE:" "Alvinnn!"