"The summer I was 8 years old, 5 hours disappeared from my life." "5 hours..." "Lost." "Gone without a trace." "I remember sitting on the bench at my Little League game." "It started to rain." "But what happened after that remains a pitch black void." "Brian ?" "You dork." "What the heck are you doing in there ?" "You're bleeding." " lt is terrible out there." " Mom !" "Hello, sweetheart." "What happened to you ?" "Brian got a bloody nose hiding in the cellar." "What were you doing down there ?" "Are you okay, sweetheart ?" "Poor little baby." "They had me all night in that mailroom." "I didn't even know it was raining." "Hold still." "Did another mom give you a ride home ?" " Goodnight." " l hope you're happy." "I knew he'd get hurt playing sports." "When I was a kid, I wasn't a star player either." "But at least I wasn't a quitter." "Sorry, dad." "Goodnight." "I told your father Little League was a stupid idea." "Hold your nose." "Mom made me quit baseball the next day." "This was when the nightmares began." "And the nosebleeds." "I wet the bed several times." "And then there were the blackouts." "I'd feel my eyes roll back in my head." "I'd crumple in the floor like a dropped puppet." "Darned thing's not even a year old yet." "Maybe it's screwed up from all the lightning last week." "Your father will be overjoyed." " What time's Dad getting home ?" " Not for another hour." "Mom." "Deborah." "Come look." "It's a UFO." "It's just a weather balloon." "Look what it's doing to the TV." "It's flying over the house." "Let's go up on the roof." "No, wait !" "Children, be careful !" "That summer, those were the two things I'd never forget." "The cramped, stale darkness of the crawlspace." "And, equal in power and mystery... ..that UFO, out there somewhere... ..traveling across the universe." "The summer I was 8 years old, I came for the first time." "I was watching my Mom going at it with her current boyfriend," "Alfred, in my old swing set." "Alfred was all Marlboro man, dumb as a fucking rock, what I would years later, come to call my type." "Only stupid things ever came out of his mouth." "But seeing him like this, whimpering, crying like a helpless animal..." "I couldn't take my eyes off of him." "I'd been masturbating for years." "But it was that summer that jizz first squirted out of my dick." "Couldn't wait to show Coach." "I should start at the beginning." "My Mom signed me up for Little League." "It was Alfred's idea, so they could fuck without paying a sitter." "Are you excited ?" "Coach Heider ?" "Desire sledge-hammered me." "He looked like the lifeguards, cowboys and firemen" "I'd seen in the "Playgirls" my mom kept under her bed." "I didn't know what to do with my feelings." "They were like a gift I had to open in front of a crowd." " Hello." " Hello, I'm Ellen McCormick." "And this is my son, Neil." "Hello, Neil." "Honey, won't you say hello to your coach ?" "Don't worry, it takes him a while to warm up to strangers." "I quickly became team star player." "Which wasn't saying much considering the other kids were all spazzes." "Our first game, I whacked a triple with bases loaded." "The crowd went fucking nuts." "But I didn't care about that." "All that mattered was it made Coach proud." "After that first victory," "Coach called my Mom to tell her he was taking the team to a movie." "Hey, big guy." "Ready to go ?" "Where's everybody else ?" "It's just you and me today." " Really ?" " Yup." "Cool." "I picked "Blood Prom" , an R-rated flick with cool gore and murders." "When this annoying blonde chick got her head chopped off, I cheered." "Then we picked up a pizza and headed back to Coach's." "Coach's house was awesome." "He had a giant TV, an Atari with Donkey Kong, Asteroids, Frogger." "All my favorite games." "You exploded." "My turn." " Sure your mom's not expecting you ?" " No, she works." "She's probably got a date with Alfred afterwards." " You spend a lot of time alone." " Yes, but I kind of like it." "I just ride my bike and watch TV." "It's cool." "Shit !" "You made me mess up !" "Sorry !" "Hold on." "Come here for a sec." "Bring one of those bottles." "This might seem a little weird at first." "But I need to record my team's voices, especially my best players." "Okay ?" "Take this." "Now just speak into it using your normal voice." "What should I say ?" "Whatever you like." "Start with your name." "Now take a big sip of pop and belch." " Shit." " Good." " Say that again." " Shit." "Again." "Shit." "Hell !" "Damn !" "Now, look up into the camera." "Now stick your tongue out." "Make a funny face." "Good." "Open your mouth wide." "Neil, that's perfect." "July second." "We had a 7:30 game against Taco Hut." "I know you'll kick their butts tonight." "Do it for your poor hard-working mom." " Getting a ride home with Coach ?" " Yeah." "You're mine and I love you and don't you ever forget it." "Boy, were you on fire tonight !" "It's the best you've ever played !" "Thanks, Coach." "Can we play more games tonight ?" "Sure, but let me show you something first." "I look stupid in this one." "No." "You look perfect." "Your expression." "Like you're having a wonderful dream." "Neil, I've been thinking a lot about you this week." "I'm hungry." "Sure." "You want a pizza ?" "I might have something you'd like." " What'll it be, little buddy ?" " My mom never buys these things." " She says they're a waste of money." " Let's eat then." "Which one do you want ?" " What are you having ?" " Corn pops." "Then I'll have..." "Cocoa Krispies." "Shit." "Sorry." "Here we go." "I like you, Neil." "I like you so much." "When I really, really like someone..." "..there's a way I show them how I feel." "Angel." "There's nothing wrong with kissing someone like this." "Don't ever let anyone tell you that it's wrong." "It happened." "That's what I told myself." "It just happened." "And after it was over, I looked down at the mess on the floor." "It was like a kaleidoscope had shattered." "And when I swallowed, the taste of Coach's tongue seared my mouth." "You liked it." "It's okay that you liked it." "Everything's gonna be okay." "Do you know him or something ?" "I met Wendy when I was 1 0 and she was 1 1 and a grade ahead." "What are you doing ?" " Damn." "No razor." " You're insane." "If I wasn't queer, we would have had sloppy teenage sex and contributing more fucked-up, unwanted kids to society." "But instead, she became my soul mate." "One true partner in crime." "Let's kidnap him." "His mom says we're supposed to take him home." " Where are you taking me ?" " A house with lots of candy." "Goody." "Beware !" "These are the eyes of the Axe Murderer's victims." " Come on, Satan." " Hurry up, chicken." "Never much cared for Halloween, but this particular year I couldn't shake the feeling something horrible was gonna happen." "And there was nothing I could do to stop it." "Wait outside for me." "I'll be done in a minute." "You hold him while I get something." " What are we doing ?" " Having fun." " What's the matter, "Satan" ?" " What did you say, punk ?" "Loser !" "Loser !" "Brian ?" "I thought that was you." "Lie down." "Lie down, retard." " What are you doing ?" " Shut up !" "Shut up, or we'll kill you." "Point the beam over here." "Open your mouth." "I said open your mouth." "Keep these in your fucking mouth." "Do what we say or I'll kill you." "I swear." "Give me the matches." "Give me the damned matches." "Shine the flashlight on him." "Neil, he's going to tattle !" "Don't worry." "There are things we can do to get him on our side." "That's it." "Just lay still for a minute." "You're my little green buddy and there's this cool thing to show you." "When I was little, a man used to do this to me." "You're really gonna like it." "There." "That's it." "That's my boy." "Wendy never looked at me quite the same after that night." "Sharing this part of myself I'd never shown anyone else..." "I knew we'd be bound together." "Forever." "I woke up not knowing where I was or what had happened to me." "Deborah said I'd been missing for over an hour." "But I couldn't remember a thing." "But I knew it was linked to the other time, when I woke up in the cellar." "And I also knew no matter how long it took... ..I had to find out what happened." "I had to find an answer to the mystery." "When I was 1 5, I overheard kids at school talking about a place." "A place you could find even in a hicktown like Hutchinson." "Bingo..." "Here we go." "How's it going ?" "Okay." "I'm Charlie." "Wanna go for a ride ?" "Sure." "You got cash ?" "I'll pay 50, no higher." "You've got to be careful out here." "The cops patrol this whole area and they know what's up." "I'm in Hutchinson on business." "I supply snack foods to the local markets." "Go ahead." "Take whatever you want." "Hungry ?" "We've only got an hour, so we'd better get busy." "Wait." "Let me." "Beautiful." "So, what do you like to do ?" "Tell me what you want me to do." "Whatever." "You like older guys ?" "Tell me." "Yeah." "That feels nice." "You are such a beautiful... ..beautiful boy." "I'm gonna come." "I'm gonna come." "I know what you're thinking." "That wasn't safe." "But we're in Kansas, thank God, not some big city full of diseases." "Plus, you're only a kid." "Maniac." "You scared me !" "Thanks for meeting me." "This better be good." "My mom'll kill me if she finds out." "I have something I wanna show you." "FRlDAYS  SATURDAYS 3 TO 4 YOUNG AND willing" "Yeah." "So ?" "That's me." "You're such a liar." "I don't believe you." " l'll prove it." " Okay." "How ?" "Oh, my God, what're you..." "Put that back in your pants, exhibitionist." " Look." " No way, pervert." "Look what the guy did to me." "Are those bruises ?" "Fucker gnawed on my dick like it was a candy cane !" "Didn't know he hurt me till I blew my load." "Well, you better watch out." "Next time someone might chomp the whole thing off." "Seriously." "Even Hutchinson has freaks." "You could end up dead." "Okay, "Mom"." "I wish there was a movie showing right now." "Me too." "A film about our lives." "Everything that's happened so far." "And the last scene would just be us standing right here." "Just you and me." "Yeah." "I hear something." "It's the voice of God." "I hear him." "I hear him." "Mom !" " lt's about to begin." " Alright, I'm coming." " VCR on ?" " l checked it twice." "It's probably going to be silly." "The commercial showed an old man... ..claiming aliens beamed him up right out of his bathtub." "If you're going to make fun, I'll just watch it by myself." "It's starting." "Tonight on "World Of Mystery"," "..we investigate the terrifying world of UFOs." "Is it mass hysteria or something all too real ?" "They kept me prisoner for hours." "They examined me like I was a frog in biology class." "And then they stuck a probe in my stomach." "I still got the scar here to prove it." "Look at that." "I always got scared anytime I watched movies about UFOs." "Even "E. T. " scared me." "Poor thing." "She looks so homely and sad." "Avalyn Friesen lives in the ordinary town of Inman, Kansas." "Inman ?" "That's only 30 miles away." "32 years old, she is unmarried." "Lives with her father and works as a secretary." "But there is something unusual about Avalyn." "For as long as she can remember, things have happened to her, things she cannot explain." "I'd heard about people who've experienced missing time." "Whole chunks of their lives they couldn't account for." "Under hypnotic regression," "I learned I'd been abducted more than 20 times." " Oh, please !" " Quiet." "The first time I was 6." "I was on my way home from a picnic with my grandparents." "It was dark and we got lost, driving down a dirt road." "Grandpa lost control and we went into a ditch." "There was this blinding white light." "But the aliens weren't interested in my grandparents." "They floated me up out of the car using a gravitational ray." "That's it. I've had enough." "I'm gonna get some ice cream." "Want some ?" "No, thanks." "I remember lying on a table." "It was cold, smooth and shiny." "The aliens surrounded me." "They were bald." "With marshmallowy heads and tiny arms." "But the worst part was their eyes." "The only way I can describe them is big, black diamonds, all liquidy and jelly-ish." "I'm finally getting out of this fucking nowhere town !" "You better let me know the second you're settled." "Or else." "You better come." "Or else." "New York City." "You're so lucky !" "Hey, assface." "What're you gawking at ?" "Faggots !" "Shit, go, go, go !" "Fuck you !" "Remember the guy I told you ?" "White Camaro ?" "That's him." "Parked by those trees." "I've fucked every john in this park." "Except for White Camaro." "So it's time for you two to get lost." "Stop scaring my business away." "You want us to pick you up later ?" "If you want." "I'll be done by 7." "We'll meet you." "I gotta get home and start packing." "Alright." "Call me tonight." "See you later." " You'd better be careful." " Of what ?" "I'm serious, you're not in Modesto anymore." "I see the way you look at him." "He's so beautiful." "I can't help it." "He's like a god." "You don't have to tell me, I was infatuated with him too once." "But I know all Neil's secrets and there's shit you don't want to know." "Once I'm gone, you'll be all Neil has and you have to understand one thing." "Where normal people have a heart," "Neil McCormick's has a bottomless black hole." "And if you don't watch out, you can fall in and get lost forever." " Brian, you home ?" " Yeah, Mom. ln here." "No class today ?" "I've got English Comp discussion group at 7:30." "You have mail." "Looks like one from your sister." "And one from A. Friesen ?" "I can't believe she wrote me back." " Who ?" " Avalyn Friesen." "The woman on TV." "She didn't have to dump a whole gallon of perfume on it." "What did she say ?" "She wants me to visit her in Inman." "Thanks for the ride, Preston." "Later." "You just missed it, sweetie." "This little old lady just won both showcases." " What did she get ?" " She got a trip to Scotland..." "A beautiful living room set." "A brand new car." "I can't remember the name of it but it cost over 27 grand." "Are you wearing cologne ?" "is work okay ?" "It's the pits." "When is our ship gonna come in, baby ?" "Soon, Ma." "Soon." "Oh, Neil, don't forget." "Tomorrow's my date." "That hot ltalian." "The guy who always comes through my checkout lane." "I'll be at work." "The last tournament of the season." "Vincenzo." "Patches !" "Patches, down." "Sorry, she gets a little excited." "Hi, you must be Brian." "I'm Avalyn, obviously." "Dad ?" "It's okay, Daddy." "It's that young man I was telling you about." "Don't mind him." "He's just a little wary of strangers." "I'm so glad you're here." "Come on." "It isn't showy, but it's home." "Here, have a seat." "I was in the middle of lunch." "I hope you don't mind." "No, go ahead. I ate earlier." "So, you saw the show ?" "Several times, I videotaped it." "They left some stuff out, but they got the major points across." "I think I was taken too." "You mentioned that in your letter." "You're where l was a few years ago, just starting to remember." "There are many of us and we need to know what happened." "So you think that's what happened to me." "Considering about the missing time and... I'm sure of it." "Feel like going on a walk ?" "What's that you're carrying ?" "It's a Dream Journal." "I keep a log of all my dreams." "Whatever bits and pieces I can recall at least." "I feel like it's slowly helping me remember." "That's a really good idea." "Your subconscious is where all your memories are buried." "For you and me and people like us almost every single thing we do stems from our being abducted." "I want to show you something they wouldn't allow on TV." "I've been tagged." "Part of their experiments." "Touch it." "When I was taken, my leg was bleeding, but I didn't remember being cut." "Under hypnosis I discovered that's where they implanted the tracking device." "Now everything I do, they know." "In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if they were spying on us right now." "When I was found that night, my nose was bleeding." "The old up-the-nose trick, so the scar can't be seen." "Don't forget to write." "Don't you forget what I told you." "You better come see me soon, asshole." "I will." "I will." "Stay out of trouble, you two." "Bye." "I can't believe it's so late." "My mom's gonna worry." "You still live with your mom ?" "My dad moved out 7 years ago." " l don't see him much." " Read me one of your dreams." "I just scribble them out in the middle of the night." " Sometimes I can barely read them." " That's okay." "This is from 2 nights ago." ""There's a blue light." "I'm in my Little League uniform and a tall alien is hovering over me." "Someone else is with me." "Another boy." "Also in uniform." "A Panther ?"" "That was the name of my baseball team." "Let's see..." ""The alien has big black eyes." "He's touching my face." "I want to cry out for help, but... ..I can't."" "You're on your way to uncovering the truth." "Think of yourself as a detective." "Concentrate on the other boy in your dreams, he could help you find the answers you're looking for." "Two outs." "Third baseman Jackson up with Hinton on deck." "Jesus." "Check out that Jackson." "Hubba hubba." "Are you joking ?" "I'd fuck him for free." "Please return all foul balls to press box, thank you." "You don't think Jackson's hot ?" "Dude, he's fat and bald !" "Different folks, different strokes." "My Daddy hit this." "Well, come here." "Collect your prize." "Thank you so much." "One second." "What will it be, big guy ?" "Cash or bubbles ?" "You can't decide." "Alright, come on, hold out your hand." " Thanks !" " You're welcome." "See you later." "What ?" "When kids do good, you gotta reward them." "Christ, it's Hinton, a.k.a. Ass of the Gods." "I am so fucking wasted !" "Oh, shit !" "Where's your mom ?" "She's probably out with her new boyfriend, Vincenzo." "I've got a wicked headache." " Do you have any pot ?" " Yeah." "Come on." "Here." "Knock yourself out." "There's a porno in the VCR if you wanna jack off." "Thanks." "You got a lighter ?" "Yeah." "Here." " You like that ?" " It tickles a little." "That feels good, doesn't it, Neil ?" "Should we put the blanket over our heads like last time ?" "Here we go." "Find what you were looking for ?" " Yeah." "Thanks a lot." " Glad I could help out." "I used to write for my school paper too." "This will really make a big difference to my article." " Maybe you'll win a Pulitzer Prize." " Maybe." "Just let me know if there's anything else you need." "Thanks so much." "You done already ?" "I'm on kind of a tight deadline." "Well, good luck." "That's two outs." "Garfield the batter, Heim on deck." "Scoot your chair back a little further." "That's better." "Wait." "Hold on a sec." "The score is Hutchinson First National Bank, 3..." "Wichita Coleman Industries, 0." "Okay." "Go on." " Where have you been ?" " Sorry." "I should've called." "I didn't realize the time." " Well, your dinner's cold as ice." " That's okay." "Brian, what's going on ?" "You've been acting so strangely." " Disappearing for hours." " lt's just school, Mom." " College is different." " Did you ever call your father back ?" "I've been busy." "I'll get it." "You finish your dinner." "He's eating his supper right now." " Who is it ?" " lt's that UFO woman." "I'll get it in the hall." "Got it." "I was just going to call you." "I found a photo of the boy." "The one from my dreams." "That's amazing." "What are you doing right now ?" "Nothing." "I need to show you something." "Can you come out here ?" "Sure." " Hi, honey." "How was work ?" " Fuck you." "I'm so fucking sick of this stinking little buttcrack of a town !" "Patches, shhh, quiet !" "You'll wake Daddy." " Thanks for coming." " No problem." "I stole this from the Chamber of Commerce." "That's him." "The boy from my dreams." "Look at his face." "You can tell he knows something." "What are you doing ?" "Start looking for him tomorrow." "Maybe he still lives in Hutchinson." "I have to show you something only you would understand." "I've fucked every single guy and his ugly uncle in this podunk town." "Twice." "You want one ?" "One of us has to drive." "I got a postcard from Wendy." "I think she's mad at me because I owe her 3 letters." "Yeah, her last P.S. is "Tell Fuckface to write me."" "So you wanna hear what she says ?" ""Hey ass." "So New York is insane and crazy in the best possible way."" "Pardon me." "Can we help you ?" "I was wondering if I might buy you boys a drink." "Fuck off." "You heard me, fag." "Fuck... off." "Stuck-up little pricks." "Harsh." "Wasn't he kinda your type ?" "No, I hate when they look like Tarzan and sound like Jane." "Let's get out of this shithole." "But we just got here ?" "Patches, get away from there !" "Farmers have been finding mutilated cattle around here for years." "I told "World of Mystery", but they conveniently edited it out." "Dad says it's "Satan worshipers" going around chopping up cows." "Come here." "Let me see your hand." "Feel that ?" "Sex organs." "They're gone." "The aliens experiment on cows because the poor things are so defenseless." "Us, on the other hand, they can't kill us." "They just leave behind hidden memories." "Which in a way is almost worse." "Notice anything else strange ?" "There's no blood." "They took that, too." "Here we go." "Oh, my God." "Brian !" "Tell him you like it." "Are you okay ?" "Oh, God." "Neil." "What are you doing ?" "Come on. lt's 2:30 in the morning." "You called me your fucking... ..angel." "Wendy's going to meet you at the station ?" "I don't want you getting lost in that crazy city." " You don't have to worry, okay ?" " Call me the minute you arrive." "Promise me, Neil." "We should've at least gotten you a decent hair cut." "I gotta take a piss." "We'll be right back." " What's the matter ?" " l don't know." "My fucking dick itches like motherfucking fuck !" "What do you want me to do about it ?" "Just look down there." "Preston, come on, help me out here." "What's wrong with me ?" "Dude." "You've got crabs." "I mean, it's no big, man." "You just go to the drug store and get this stuff called "Rid"." "You'd better be playing safe." "I stay in control." "Honey, your bus is boarding." "Alright." "My baby." "You're all grown up." "You'll be careful ?" "Yeah, I will." "You're mine and I love you." "Don't you ever forget it." "Come on. I'll buy you Dairy Queen." "So what now that Neil's gone ?" " l'll kill myself." " Eric, that is not funny." "Well, I start Community College next week." "Really ?" "That's so wonderful." "Pathetic is more like it." "You can always come over even without Neil around." "Thanks, Mrs. M. I may just take you up on that." "You better." "Who the hell is that ?" "Incognito Boy Scout ?" "Can I help you ?" " ls this your house ?" " Yes." "Sorry to bother you, I got your address out of the phonebook." "I've been checking every McCormick in Hutchinson and you're the last one." "Anyway, I don't mean to babble..." "What do you want ?" " l'm looking for an N. McCormick." " Are you fbi ?" "Sorry honey, you are shit outta luck." "You mean there's no N. McCormick living here ?" "I mean we just put him on a bus headed for New York City." "I'm Neil's friend, Eric, and this is his Mom." "His name is Neil." "Yeah." "I'm Brian." "Brian Lackey." "So you still haven't written." "Big surprise." "But Wendy says you're doing okay, which is cool." "I've been wanting to tell you about this strange guy I met 3 weeks ago." "No, we're not fucking." "Get your mind out of the gutter." "He's not even gay, I don't think." "In fact, his vibe is kind of weirdly asexual." "His name is Brian Lackey." "He lives in Little River and, like yours truly, attends Loser Community College." "Anyway, the day you left, your mom and I found him on your doorstep, looking for you." "He says you played Little League together 1 0 years ago." "He was the worst player on the team," "He's full of questions about you." "But I haven't told him much, i.e. about your "line of work"." "I did say you were queer like me, I figured you wouldn't care." "But now, are you ready for the good part ?" "He thinks that when you were little, you were both abducted by aliens." "How brilliant is that ?" "But he was completely serious." "You should've seen the look in his eyes." "So, what's the story, dude ?" "Were you abducted by a UFO or what ?" "P.S. Are your crabs gone yet ?"" "Yeah ?" " You have a visitor." " Hi Brian." "I was in the neighborhood and I thought I'd stop by." "I'll be in the front room if you need me." "Thanks, Mom." "Didn't care for that film." "That, I didn't see." "Your Mom doesn't like me very much." "She thinks I'm trying to steal you away." "Any luck in your search for "N. McCormick" ?" "I met his mom and his best friend, but he's in New York right now." "New York." "Really ?" "Here." "Sit down." "Had any more of those dreams ?" "Yeah." "But they seem to be slowly evolving." "And maybe it's just because I've been spending time with Eric," "Neil's friend." "But it's becoming clearer and clearer that he... ..Neil that is, is a key figure in all this." "Like he was there with me the night it all happened." "I can't." "Don't." "No. I can't." " l can't." " lt's okay." " No." "No." "Don't." " lt'll feel good." "Don't !" " l'm sorry." " You better go." " Please." " l'm sorry, Brian." "I pay 1 20." "Not a cent more." "Okay." "Shall we ?" "Fuck me !" "Fuck me up the ass with your hot, teenaged cock !" "Wait !" "What the fuck are you doing ?" "Okay." "Whatever." "I'll put it on for you." "There." "Well, come on, stud." "We're on the clock here." "We're not in Kansas anymore, Neil." "You have got to be so careful." " l know." " Don't "l know" me, Neil McCormick." "This is New York City." "You do the wrong thing with the wrong person and you die." "Period." "End of story." "Just promise me you'll be safe." "Here." "Are these the only kinds of movies you watch ?" "Why ?" "You don't like it ?" "No, it's cool." "So, has Neil gotten back to you yet ?" "Let me explain The Universe of Neil McCormick." "He's like a planet, Saturn, say." "And we're all like little moons orbiting around." "Now, do planets write letters ?" "But I do know he'll be in Hutchinson for Christmas." "His mom told me she sent him a ticket to fly home." "So I'll introduce you then." " Yeah ?" " How about a study break ?" "Thanks, Mrs. Lackey." "Thanks, Mom." "It's 1 1 :30." "If it's Avalyn..." "tell her I'm not here." "No, I'm sorry, Avalyn, he's out with his friends." "No problem." " l thought you kinda liked her." " l just..." "I don't know." "I think I just need a little space from her right now." "I always thought she was a freak anyway." "I'm off to bed." "Good night, boys." "I'm Zeke." "From L.A." "What are you doing in New York City ?" "That's a Vermeer." "Well, it's sort of a Vermeer." "You are exquisite." "I guess it's my turn, huh ?" "Hope..." "these don't frighten you too much." "They have a habit of popping up in the most inopportune places." "I know." "Don't be worried." "This is gonna be the safest encounter you've ever had." "If you could just rub my back." "Really, I need to be touched." "Make me happy." "You were 1 00 percent safe, right ?" "Yeah. I told you I just jerked off, he watched from across the room." "It was the first time in my life I'm bothered by it." "Maybe you should try and find another safer way to make money." "Like everyone else." "Yeah, maybe." "You are the only one I've ever told." "I know." "I never told Eric, or told my Mom." "I know some people might think it's fucked up, or terrible." "But what happened that summer is a huge part of me." "No one ever made me feel that way, before or since." "Like I... I was special." "Neil, you were 8 years old." "Yeah, but he really loved me." "I mean, there were other kids sometimes, but... I was his prize." "I was his one true love." "Happy birthday." "You didn't have to get me anything." "It's just a little something I picked out." "Cool." "I thought it'd go great with your hair color." "It's so cool." "Thanks." "You alright ?" "I'm drunk." "I've never been drunk in my life." "I'm corrupting you." "At last !" "That's pretty good." "Yeah, sure." "No, really." "You have definite artistic talent, my boy." "That's an interesting touch." "What's the "deep meaning" behind the baseball cleats ?" "I have no idea." " How was work ?" " Fucking boring." " You need a hand ?" " Sure." "I've got news for you." " Well, me too." " Okay." "You first." "Look what my Mom sent me today." "She wants me to come home for Christmas." "Your mom is the coolest." " Mine would never do that for me." " That's weird." "I hate Hutchinson more than anything." "But I'm kind of looking forward to going back, just for a short visit." " Plus you get to see Eric." " Yeah." "So what's your news ?" "I think I found you a job." "What ?" "I was talking to this friend at work about you." "It's only minimum wage at a stupid sandwich place, but..." " But ?" " You're not into it, it's cool." "No, tell me more about it." " Really ?" " l want to hear more about it." " You do ?" " Yeah." "You sure you're gonna be okay ?" "I'm just glad my Mom's working late." "Thanks for everything." "This has been the best birthday ever." "You're welcome." "Shit." "Who's that ?" "It's my Dad." "Dad ?" "Son." "I caught you." "Your Mother said she didn't know whether you'd be home or not." "Happy Birthday." "What are you doing here ?" "I'm not allowed to wish my son a happy birthday ?" "Dad, I haven't seen you for what, 2 years ?" "Well, maybe if you called back..." "Maybe I don't want to call back." "Maybe I just want you to leave me alone." "Brian, don't be like this." "I drove all this way." "Just to see how you're doing." "Well, let me tell you what I want to know." "Something happened to me when I was little." "Do you know what I'm talking about ?" "When I woke up bleeding in the cellar ?" "Where were you that night ?" "God, I can tell you don't even remember !" " You're drunk." " Quit avoiding the subject !" "I was bleeding, I kept passing out." "I wet my fucking bed and you never asked why !" "And what about that Halloween ?" "Something happened to me both those nights !" "What do you know about it ?" "Tell me !" "I'm sorry, Brian. I... I can't help you." "May I help you ?" " Redecorating ?" " Sort of." " How have you been ?" " Good." " How's Berkeley ?" " Hold on, you two." "Let's continue this in the front room over the peanut-butter peach pie I baked." " Good to see you, little brother." " You too." "Need a lift ?" "Sure." " Where we going ?" " My place." "Don't worry, I'll pay." " lt's Christmas Eve tomorrow." " No more talking." " Where are we ?" " Brighton Beach." "Bedroom's this way." "Do it." "Again." "Strip." "Open wide and suck it, slut." "What are you waiting for, slut ?" "Suck it !" "You like that, don't you, slut ?" "Take it deep." "Moan for me." "Slut knows what's coming next." " l'm giving slut what he wants..." " There're some things I don't do." "Wait. I gotta take a piss." "I'll be right back." "You're getting fucked, slut, whether you like it or not." "Slut !" "Are you ready ?" "Here it comes." "Mom." "Today is the day." " Now where are you off to ?" " l'm going out with Eric." "You don't want to stay and talk with your sister a while ?" " l'll be back soon." " Don't be late, young man." "Christmas Eve dinner's at 6 sharp." "Here we are." " Do I look okay ?" " Okay's a relative term." "I'm kidding." "You look fine." " Excited ?" " Yes." "And nervous." "Don't worry." "I'm sure you guys will hit it off." "I hope you're right." " Oh, hi, Eric." " Mrs. M., Merry Christmas." " You remember Brian." " Of course I do." " Hi, Brian." " Merry Christmas." " So where's the Man of the Hour ?" " l was going to call you." " What happened ?" " There's been an accident." "Neil got mugged on the way to the airport." "is he okay ?" "He's going to be fine." "He's asleep in his room." " Maybe we should come back tomorrow." " Maybe." "Or you stay if you'd like, have some cookies and see if he's..." "Honey, you're up." "The fuck are you staring at, Preston ?" "Brian says you both were in Little League together." "So how long has it been since you two last saw each other ?" "1 0 years... ..5 months and 7 days." "You must have a lot of catching up to do." "Turn right off Main by the fairgrounds." " So what the fuck happened ?" " Long story. I'll tell you later." "Just drive for now." "It's nice to see New York hasn't hardened you one bit..." "So you're the legendary Brian." " We have a lot in common, don't we ?" " l think so." "Make a left at the next stop sign." "is this starting to look familiar ?" "Pick us up in a half hour." "You ready ?" "Blue." "No one's home." "Let's go round back." "We have to get in." "I know a way here." "Voilà." "You were the best player on the team, weren't you ?" "That's what he always told me." "Help." "This was his bedroom." "At least the ceiling's still the same." "I used to get lost for hours staring at all the patterns." "Whirls, speckly sparkly things." "Come on." "What's up with these people ?" "He used to keep these things stocked." "This is it, right ?" "Why now ?" "Why did you search me out ?" "I'm tired of it." "I want to dream about something else for a change." ""Away in a Manger"... lt took till I actually laid eyes on you today to remember you." "When Eric wrote me, I only got the vaguest picture in my head." "Like a staticky TV." "Same here." "But seeing you here... ..in this room... I feel like he's watching us right now." "I have no idea what happened to him." "After that summer, he just disappeared." "I don't know if he's even alive or what." "Maybe it's his ghost watching us." "Tell me everything you can." "I was his favorite." "Out of everyone, he picked me." "I know it sounds kind of weird, but... ..when it first started happening... I felt honored." "Go on." "This is where the big TV was, all the cool video games." "That's the kitchen." "The first time happened there... lt lasted that whole summer." "Just me and him." "I saw him one other time." "On Halloween, a couple years later." "I was lost." "He said my name." "Brian ?" "Brian ?" "I thought that was you." "The game had just started." "I was sitting on the bench as always." "It started to rain..." "Sprinkles at first, then a downpour." "The ump called the game." "And no one came to pick you up." "My Mom was working and my Dad, who knows." "Everyone else drove off with their parents." "I was left there all alone." "Then you were in the dugout with me and you said..." "We'll take you home." "And we got in Coach's station wagon, remember ?" "He brought us here." "It's alright, Brian." "We're going to have a little fun." "And he didn't want you in the bedroom because that was just for us." "So it all happened here, in this room." "Keep going." "Don't stop until you've told me everything." "When there was another boy, it was always the same." "The Coach used me as a prop to pull you in." "He'd undress me and and I had to make it seem fun." "Like it was a really cool game." "Go ahead, show him, Neil." "Alright, here are the rules." "I kiss you, then you kiss me back." "And then it's his turn." "Are you ready ?" "Here we go." "My God..." "You want me to stop ?" "So I put my tongue in your mouth, getting it all wet and shiny." "Then it was his turn." "Watching his big lips sucking your face, I remember thinking he's going to swallow his head whole." "So, we took off your clothes and you made this whimpering puppy sound that Coach always loved." "Coach and me had this thing where he would wrap his mouth around my dick and balls." "He did that to me and I tried to do it to you but couldn't because my mouth was too small." "Then, he went down on you" "for what seemed like a really long time." "Now your eyes were closed mostly but every now and then they would flutter open, and had this glassy, faraway look." "And then... I leaned in and whispered..." "It's fun right ?" "Tell him you like it." "We're almost finished." "Can you be able...?" "Yeah." "Then we played the 5 dollar game." "When Coach would ask me to do things, crazy sex things." "And if I could do them, he'd give me a 5 dollar bill." "It's okay." "Go ahead, Neil." "He made us fist him." "Do you know what that is ?" "I went first, of course." "And on that night, the 5 dollars was mine if I could ram my fist up his ass all the way to the elbow." "And goddamn it, I did it." "I'll never forget how it felt." "It felt like his body was trying to suck me into it." "Devour me." "And then I did it too." "And then we drove you back to Little River and left you in your driveway." "The End." "And my nose was bleeding." "How did that happen ?" "When it was over and we were getting you dressed, your face looked like you'd been erased." "And you were just empty inside." "And you just fell." "Face first on the floor." "And when we pulled you up, your nose was bleeding." "Like this ?" "Like this ?" "Stop." " No one's even home." " No, someone's there." " l can see them." " Where ?" " l don't see anything." " Now I see them too." "What's going on ?" "I think someone's in there." "And as we sat there listening to the carolers," "I wanted to tell Brian it was over and everything would be okay." "But that was a lie." "Plus I couldn't speak anyway." "I wished there's some way for us to go back and undo the past." "But there wasn't." "There was nothing we could do." "So I just stayed silent and tried to telepathically communicate how sorry I was about what had happened." "I thought of all the sadness and suffering in the world." "And made me want to escape." "I wished with all my heart we could just leave this world behind." "Rise like two angels in the night and magically... ..disappear."