"(COUNTRY SONG PLAYING)" "RICH:" "Hey." "ANDREW:" "Hey." "(CHUCKLES)" "You find me okay?" "Yeah, sure did." "Good, good." "Normally, I have to come looking. (LAUGHS)" "Are you Rich?" "I am." "Okay." "(CHUCKLES) Hi, I'm Andrew." "Good to have you." "Pleasure." "Pleasure to be here." "That's Hannah." "Hi." "Hi." "Pleasure to have you." "How are you?" "Thank you." "(KISSES) All right." "Come on in." "Okay, well, you know..." "Kitchen." "Over here, we got the, uh, dining room, you know, uh..." "Living room, games room, uh, bedroom." "Bathroom over there and, uh..." "Oh, uh, the practice room, back over there." "You guys bring instruments?" "We did not." "No!" "No." "Oh, no." "Okay, well, we got some tambourines, stuff like that." "I only mentioned it because, uh, there's a crystal deposit that just runs right under the house." "You know, and it's just..." "(IMITATES DRILLING SOUND)" "Really good for making sounds, you know what I mean?" "Yes." "Yeah." "I knew you did." "I knew you did." "Okay, well, um..." "Let me see." "Hot tub, back here." "Let me show you." "Okay." "So you take this, and then you just, you put it in here and, uh, you know." "I mean, that's pretty much it." "Well, uh, you might need a lead time because it takes a while." "Uh... (PUFFS) What else, what else?" "Oh, oh!" "The wind." "It's going to come whipping through here like a panther in the night." "Okay, so make sure that those trash bins are locked down." "Got it?" "Okay." "Will do." "All right." "Bye." "Have fun." "(HONKING)" "(WOMAN GROANS) DAVE:" "Coming in hot." "Jesus!" "(GROANS) Hey!" "(EXCLAIMS) Whoo!" "That doesn't look like my old friend." "That does." "That looks like..." "Hi!" "Hi!" "I told you as soon as you got here..." "You look so pretty." "Thank you, so do you." "(KISSES)" "Hello." "Hi." "Hey, man." "What up, Captain?" "OWEN:" "Are we making meth or what?" "ANDREW:" "Yeah, that's exactly why I chose this place." "Hi." "Hey, how you doing?" "(GUITAR STRUMMING) ♪ Andrew I'm having a problem" "♪ You could help me with" "♪ I haven't been drinking enough" "♪ Water in the desert you've been warned" "♪ Ow, ow, ow!" "♪ He's pissing rocks He's pissing rocks" "♪ He's pissing rocks He's pissing rocks." "He's pissing rocks" "(YODELING)" "♪ Drain it Oh-Oh-Oh" "♪ Ya-ha-ha-ho" "♪ Ow, ow, ow" "♪ Oh" "DAVE:" "Oh, it feels good to be out here." "ANDREW:" "Right?" "DAVE:" "You know, I just love this house." "ANDREW:" "Me, too." "(METAL CLANKS) EMILY AND ZOE:" "No." "DAVE:" "It's graceful though." "(METAL CLANKS) BOTH:" "Oh!" "(CHUCKLES)" "(INDISTINCT CHATTER)" "DAVE:" "There's not enough points." "We got a point." "EMILY:" "He seems good." "He seems better." "HANNAH:" "Does he?" "EMILY:" "Yeah." "HANNAH:" "He was doing so well and then suddenly, he just... (MIMICS AIR ESCAPING)" "Check this out." "(ALL LAUGHING)" "HANNAH:" "Do you know what I was thinking about?" "Today, for some reason, that time that we tried to rent a trailer." "Oh!" "Oh, my God!" "We, uh, we..." "Well..." "We attempted to, um, rent a trailer and go on a road trip to Alaska." "With the stripping vegan!" "Dude, shut the fuck up." "What?" "What?" "All right." "I may have been involved at the time with a vegan dancer." "Oh." "Wow!" "OWEN:" "Dancer." "Dancer." "Sorry." "Yeah." "(WHISPERS) Dancer." "She was nice." "Her clothes just kept on falling off." "It was the strangest thing." "Not in front of us." "Anyway, enough about the stripping vegan." "I apologize, I apologize." "I would like to make a toast." "Uh, first of all, happy birthday, Andrew." "Oh, I'm not done!" "And to a vacation." "Or for those of us who, um, just work from home, Andrew and Dave, uh, to life." "Aw." "To having a great week." "To not dying of cancer." "(CHUCKLES)" "Wow." "I..." "Hmm?" "I have mouth diarrhea." "I'm sorry." "To no one else dying of cancer." "Hear, hear." "OWEN:" "Ah, there you go." "There you go." "Cheers." "(WHEEZES)" "DAVE:" "This pasta is delicious." "Thank you." "ZOE:" "Thank you so much." "All right." "OWEN:" "And the salad is also delicious." "(CHUCKLES) Don't stress about it." "So, um..." "Thank you all so much for being so great about..." "Everything." "You know, with the..." "With the service, and with the, uh, helping with the food." "Hey, we are here for you." "We love you, man." "Hmm." "Yeah, we love you so much." "Yeah." "I'm, uh..." "Still trying to deal with the fact that my mom is gone, and that's..." "I never really ever got to make peace with..." "Anything." "And I know that it was a trek to come out here." "And I know that, you know, it was last minute." "But, uh... (SIGHS)" "There is a reason I asked you all to come." "And, uh..." "I have decided that what I really want is, uh..." "To have sex with everyone here." "(LAUGHS) Oh, man." "(LAUGHS)" "(ALL LAUGHING)" "OWEN:" "Oh, God." "DAVE:" "Oh, my God, dude." "(ZOE LAUGHS)" "That's what I really want." "You want what?" "Like all of us, or..." "Just the boys?" "(CHUCKLES)" "No, just..." "Just the women." "Actually, um..." "I would love to have sex with all of you." "At the same time." "(ZOE SCOFFS)" "Is this a joke?" "I'm sorry." "I feel like this is a joke on me or something." "What, Hannah?" "ANDREW:" "No." "It's not a joke." "Mammals." "Mammals, you know, they need each other." "Mammals?" "Love is so powerful." "And I need it." "I need it." "I need like..." "A steroid injection of it." "To heal." "Holy fuck!" "I don't mean to put anyone in an awkward place." "I really, really don't." "I, uh..." "No one has to decide tonight." "We have a whole week here." "ANDREW:" "So..." "Oh, good." "We have a week to make this decision." "(CHUCKLES)" "♪ For he's a jolly good fellow" "♪ For he's a jolly good fellow" "♪ For he's..." "Don't, don't, don't." "So, is this something that you're considering?" "(SIGHS) My feeling has been that if I ignore it long enough, it will go away." "That's kind of my basic strategy." "Okay." "Um..." "Few questions." "(CHUCKLES)" "What does his therapist have to say about all this?" "Oh, did I not tell you?" "He stopped going." "EMILY:" "Hannah." "No more therapy." "The dude like, really needs to be in therapy." "You should..." "You should try to tell him that, 'cause he doesn't want to hear it." "Okay." "Wow!" "We got some work to do, huh?" "You realize that what..." "What position this puts us all in." "It's not, it's really not cool, man." "Uh..." "I totally understand that and I also..." "I also don't care." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "Oh, that's good." "I get it." "What?" "No, I get it." "I mean, think about it, you know..." "The worst thing in the world happens to you and you want to turn it into something positive." "I mean, his mom died of fucking horrible cancer." "And now he wants to use that opportunity to sleep with his friends' girlfriends." "Your girlfriend, man." "He's talking about your girlfriend." "I get that." "And you're just cool with that?" "Absolutely not." "All right, are we going to play pool or what?" "Yeah, I think we should have a game of cut-throat." "Okay." "(BALLS CLICK)" "You know, you guys just play, I'm gonna play winner." "Rack 'em, bitch." "Hey." "Hey." "What?" "I just feel so embarrassed, you know?" "Why are you embarrassed?" "You shouldn't be embarrassed." "It's like... (HUFFS)" "Just..." "The fact that he dragged all you guys into it and..." "(SIGHS) If you want to just leave..." "No, no, no." "I get it and..." "No." "We're here for you, too." "You know?" "Thank you." "Friend." "Thanks." "Yeah." "I'm sorry." "Thanks." "I scratched out." "(SIGHS) All right." "(HANNAH CHUCKLES)" "I'm going to bed." "Good night." "(BALLS CLICKING)" "I mean, I'd be pretty pissed off, too, if the roles were reversed." "Yeah?" "And what would you say in that situation?" "(STUTTERS) Uh, I would say, "Andrew," ""why don't you try to put yourself in Owen's shoes," ""who is on the very edge of a nervous breakdown."" "Dude, we're all on the very edge of a nervous breakdown." "It's called life!" "You know what I think?" "I think that you're just trying to get sex." "And you think that if you act fucked up enough, then no one will have the balls to call you out on what you're doing." "I don't want you to punch me in the face, 'cause that's my moneymaker." "(CHUCKLES)" "Oh, boy." "Oh, God, Zoe." "(KISSES)" "Oh." "I'm so glad you agreed to do this." "(GASPING AND KISSING)" "Oh, my God." "You're so beautiful." "(MOANS) Hmm." "Oh, my God." "You're really helping me with my healing process." "(GIGGLES) Ew!" "(MOANS)" "You taste so good." "Stop." "Oh, don't move." "Don't move." "No." "It'll be over in a second." "(MOANS AND KISSES) Oh, God!" "(GRUNTS)" "(CHUCKLES)" "I don't like it here." "(SIGHS)" "I don't suppose you have an answer for me about that other thing?" "I really want to go." "Like leave?" "Yes." "This is extremely uncomfortable." "No, he's not serious." "He's not." "He gets these ideas in his head, you just have to ignore him." "I think he's really serious." "He's like a brother to me." "I can't just walk out on him." "He wants me to have sex with him!" "No, he doesn't." "I mean, yes, he does." "Of course, who wouldn't?" "But... (GROANS) No, he's not serious." "You really want to leave?" "Yeah." "Okay, I'll talk to Owen." "I got to finish first." "No. (CHUCKLES)" "This will take me like 20 seconds, okay?" "He's just a fucking dick." "You know." "His mom just died." "Well, so, you know, if I lose a leg in Iraq, then do I just suddenly have permission to come all over your mom's face?" "(LAUGHS) What?" "Well, I'm just saying." "It's not..." "You don't get a free thing." "(LAUGHS) Right." "I just think that he's really sick." "He's a sick man, he's in a lot of pain." "I just..." "I feel bad for him." "Don't you want to sleep with him?" "No!" "No." "I just..." "(CHUCKLES)" "I just want to help him." "What?" "I just want to help him." "This is not happening." "(STUTTERS) You want to help him?" "(SIGHS)" "Have you ever taken a shower with him?" "You know, I need this conversation to be over..." "I need to know if you have ever seen his dick." "You're asking me if he has a nice dick?" "No, I'm not asking you If he has a nice dick," "I want to know how big it is." "Oh, my God!" "I'm not asking you because I care." "I'm asking you 'cause I want to know if it's going to hurt me." "I have no idea, okay?" "Well, but..." "(STAMMERS) I've, I've..." "I've never seen him with an erection, okay?" "So I don't know how big his hard dick is." "Uh, like some guys are growers, some guys are not." "And I don't know which he is, and I don't want to talk about it and I..." "My friend Andrew's penis that you're talking about, if it's going to hurt you?" "(SHUSHES)" "Why are we even talking about this?" "(WHISPERS) I'm sorry." "(SIGHS)" "I'm sorry." "I was just curious." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "That was a 24-hour joke, right?" "OWEN:" "Wait, we're not still talking about that, are we?" "DAVE:" "I'm not talking about it." "DAVE:" "No, I'm talking about not talking about it." "It's over and..." "Yeah." "Can I say something?" "Sure, Andrew." "Hmm." "Okay." "So..." "One hundred years ago," "Holy fucking mother shank!" "Shut your filthy mouth crater." "Right now." "What?" "He was going to try to convince you to sleep with him by reciting some sort of symbolic desert tale." "I bet you fucking spent all week memorizing." "I bet you googled it like 1000 times." ""Desert redemption orgy Joshua tree."" ""Native American California sandy cock rub."" "Plus, how to convince women." "Hmm." "(IMITATES BEEPING SOUND)" "Guys, he was not." "That actually was my plan." "OWEN:" "Unbelievable." "WAITRESS:" "Can I get you anything else?" "No, I think we're done here." "Really?" "So you're telling me that you couldn't do this for like the next 30 or 40, or 50 years?" "(CHUCKLES)" "No." "Oh, come on." "This is like, this has got to be like the greatest vacation you've ever taken, right?" "It's like, um, maybe the second best vacation you've ever taken." "Mmm." "I, uh..." "(CHUCKLES)" "Have to think about that." "ZOE:" "I mean, it's up there." "Hey, guys." "Would you mind if I joined you?" "Sure, buddy." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "(EXCLAIMS) Ooh!" "(HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) Ooh!" "This is nice." "Zoe, I know we're not super close, but I just wanted to thank you for understanding last night, and not laughing in my face." "Okay." "Are you on drugs?" "Not right now." "Yeah, but are you taking a bunch of drugs?" "No." "'Cause, man, I love you, but you're acting like a freak." "I know." "So, please stop." "I don't think I'm going to." "ANDREW:" "That one." "OWEN:" "That's too far." "Exactly." "That's the one." "(SHOUTS) Oh, yeah!" "Oh, you hit the rock?" "I'm sorry, I didn't see it." "Me either." "You guys are kidding me?" "Look, I'm, I'm sure that you hit the rock." "I'm just saying that personally, I did not see it." "That is also what I am saying." "(ROCK THUDS)" "Suck it, bitches." "Oh, did you hit the rock again?" "I..." "I wasn't paying attention." "I, yeah, I hit it again twice in a row." "I was looking right at it." "I didn't see it, but maybe I heard it." "I feel like I heard it." "Funny joke, guys." "This is cool." "ANDREW:" "Oh, you know what it was?" "I stepped on a twig." "DAVE:" "Oh." "And it sounded similar." "Let's, let's hear it." "(SNAPS)" "ANDREW:" "It's identical." "That's definitely what I heard." "DAVE:" "Listen, can we go catch up with the ladies and stop?" "Yeah." "OWEN:" "Mmm-hmm." "You just have to admit that I hit the rock." "Look, Owen, I'm totally sure that you totally hit that rock." "Okay, now say it like you mean it." "Can we just catch up with our beautiful ladies instead of sitting here having an argument about..." "ANDREW:" "Oh, don't." "Dude." "You just hit me with that rock." "Admit it." "Don't do it." "Admit it." "Or what?" "Or I'm going to throw this rock at you." "Couldn't hit me if you tried." "You don't think?" "(GRUNTS)" "Dude, those are too big." "There are no rules in a rock fight." "Argh!" "What are you doing, dude?" "Maneuvering." "(PANTS)" "OWEN:" "Andrew, that is too big, dude." "Here it comes." "Dude, that is too big!" "(YELLS) (GROANS)" "Ow!" "Ow!" "(PANTS)" "We were messing around." "You threw a rock at him." "It was just a game." "Yeah, he did it on purpose." "(GASPS) Dude, I did not..." "You did do it on purpose." "(SCOFFS) Okay." "Whatever." "You're an asshole." "You should..." "You know what?" "Mmm." "Ooh!" "(CHUCKLES)" "Ow." "Too much, too much." "I'm okay." "Can you do me a favor?" "Yes." "And then just..." "(ALL CHEERING)" "OWEN:" "The first time I saw him, the sun glinting off his flaxen-haired bodice in the waves, I knew." "What?" "Simon hated everything about his grandfather, but most especially, he hated his shiny little rat-eyes." "Mmm." "OWEN:" "Okay." "I grew up in three distinctly different and yet eerily similar religions." "Here you go." "Hey, you want to come to bed?" "Not right now." "Are you sure?" "Yeah." "Maybe you should come to bed soon and we'll have time to talk." "About what?" "I'm not feeling good." "Then take an Advil." "No, like..." "I'm having fun!" "(GRUNTS)" "Say something, bitch." "Say something, bitch!" "(GRUNTS)" "Yeah." "Dave wants to leave tomorrow." "No." "I don't want to leave Andrew alone." "I feel like I owe him one." "Are you serious right now?" "Yes." "He brought you fucking soup when you hurt your back." "That hardly entitles him to slip it in you." "He came over every single day." "I had a fucking job!" "You know what?" "Forget it." "(SIGHS)" "You know what?" "He's not dying." "He doesn't have cancer." "It's one step removed." "It was his mom." "You are your mom." "What?" "You are your mom." "It's like having cancer yourself." "You realize that if you do this," "I will never, ever forgive you." "It's not something that you can come back from." "You know that his dad left when he was like, 10." "He just left." "No note." "And his mom..." "You met his mom." "Hmm." "So you're saying I should fuck his brains out?" "No." "No!" "You don't seem that anxious." "How do you mean?" "I don't know." "Shouldn't you be more anxious, waiting for me to answer your question?" "Shouldn't you answer my question already?" "(CLICKS TONGUE)" "Toosh." "It's touche." "It doesn't rhyme with douche." "(CHUCKLES) I know it's touche." "It's an abbreviation." "An abbriev." "Hey." "I think you need help." "I think there's something wrong with you." "I think you don't know how to deal with all this pain and it's making you go crazy." "I understand." "(SIGHS)" "That's not a response." "I understand what you're saying and I will really think about it." "You need to go back to therapy." "I don't need therapy." "I know what I need." "To fuck all my friends?" "I need love." "I need a great wave of love." "And yes, I need it to be gigantic and astounding, and, and unreal." "What if we all do this thing for you and it doesn't change anything?" "Then at least I tried." "(THUDS)" "(WHISPERS) What was that?" "Probably like a desert mouse." "What?" "Like a rodent." "Maybe you should go see what it is." "(SCOFFS)" "I'll go see what it is." "Hello." "Hello." "Hello!" "We don't want your kind here." "Holy shit!" "Hi, who are you?" "Hello, are you friendly?" "You're friendly..." "Oh, you're really friendly." "Hi." "Hi, there." "Hi, there." "Were you here to sell me some crystal meth, or something?" "Look at you!" "Man, you stink." "You stink." "Are you nice?" "What's your name?" "No tag." "I'm gonna name you..." "I'm gonna name you Grously." "Yeah." "Grously." "Man, you are an ugly piece of shit, Grously." "Andrew." "Hey." "What are you doing?" "Just..." "Just talking to this dog." "Can you come back inside?" "In a second." "Hi." "(BELL DINGING)" "Did you hear that?" "Yeah." "Just some kind of desert..." "Bell?" "There it is." "There it is again." "I didn't want to disturb you." "No." "What can we do you for?" "(LAUGHS)" "Do me for?" "Oh, listen to you." "Well..." "Have you boys seen a dog around here?" "Uh, no." "What kinda dog?" "Just the regular kind." "No." "(BOTH SHRUG)" "Hmm." "You mind if I sit down?" "Yeah, course." "Phew." "Here, have a seat." "Yeah, I..." "The dog has been missing for about three days and" "I kind of thought he's dead." "But I figured I should take a look around anyway." "That's where I live." "That's my property." "All that, right onto that ridge." "Wow!" "(MAN LAUGHING)" "You all come over some time." "I..." "I used to have taco Tuesdays." "(ALL CHUCKLING)" "That was big." "You know, I've seen some jackrabbits jumping around out there." "Oh, yeah." "Jackrabbits, mmm-hmm." "Do you..." "Do you hunt 'em or do you..." "Oh, jackrabbits." "No." "I don't allow anyone to shoot any of the critters on my property." "Oh." "You understand?" "Yeah." "They're like children to me." "I mean, just the other day, finally," "I got a packrat to nearly eat right out of my hand." "But you gotta be careful because if they spot something shiny like, uh-huh..." "See that there." "They'll just snatch it and carry it right off." "The rats?" "Yeah." "Yeah, I... (LAUGHS)" "That's how I got this." "I was almost married once." "Hmm." "Yeah." "Okay." "Uh..." "I better be going." "Don't you boys do anything that I wouldn't do." "Wow." "You see the way he put that?" "Oh." "That's not all." "Yeah." "DAVE:" "He's playing harmonica." "OWEN:" "Amazing" "DAVE:" "Just walking away playing harmonica." "OWEN:" "Amazing." "I saw his dog." "What?" "I saw his dog." "What?" "Did you think you should have told him that?" "I don't know, I just saw it outside." "Don't you think he could have used that piece of information to put together some kinda timeline?" "Yeah, he's definitely putting together a dog timeline." "(DOOR CLOSES)" "(LAUGHING)" "Mmm." "Hi." "We're still here." "Yeah, I noticed." "But I'm gonna fix it, okay?" "Okay." "Oh, yeah." "Oh, yeah." "Right there." "Right there." "Give me the growl." "(GROWLING)" "I'm okay if we stay." "Okay." "This is a new regime, it's gonna make you feel better." "I think it's..." "(STRAINING)" "I think I'm gonna throw up, right now." "It hurt me." "I'm sorry." "Oh, yes." "Painful things." "Painful things." "Um..." "I told Andrew that he needs to go back to therapy." "And what did he say?" "He said he needs to fuck my friends." "Hmm." "Wise man." "Do you remember Jason?" "Motorcycle Jason or cousin Jason?" "Cousin Jason." "Do you remember that place he went to, I felt like it really helped him." "Andrew isn't cra..." "He's not crazy, Emily." "He's like going through..." "He's not like cousin Jason." "No, I know, but I just feel like it might help." "No." "Um..." "I'm going to deal with this." "It's my job." "Okay." "It's gonna be good, it's gonna be fun." "You have the edibles?" "Of course, man, I always have the edibles." "Oh, God." "Hello." "BOTH:" "Hey." "Hi." "Was looking for you." "Oh." "Did you just exercise, young lady?" "Yes, I did." "Kind of." "Uh, listen, me and the boys, I think we're gonna set out for a little adventure." "Today I think we're gonna go bowling." "Okay." "It's gonna be good." "Is it..." "Is that really what you're doing?" "Yeah." "Okay." "Have fun." "Okay." "Our little boys day." "Have a good cool down." "Enjoy the break from us crazies." "All right." "This is the worst idea ever." "Or the best." "ANDREW:" "Where are we going?" "OWEN:" "It's a surprise." "DAVE:" "Don't worry about it, okay?" "Is that..." "Is this where we are going?" "This is it." "Why is this where we're going?" "Come on, big boy." "You got the key?" "(KNOCKING ON DOOR)" "Hi." "Yes." "Hi, you Dave?" "Go." "All right." "Oh, no, no, no, no." "It's not for me..." "It's for..." "ANDREW:" "No, no, no, no, no." "Oh, no." "No." "No, no." "No." "Andrew." "Andrew." "ANDREW:" "No." "No." "ANDREW:" "No." "DAVE:" "Come on." "Andrew." "I'm sorry, ladies." "Can you just step out for..." "ANDREW:" "Get them out of here." "Vending machines or something." "But stay excited." "It's gonna be a big party." "Andrew, what the fuck?" "ANDREW:" "What is this?" "What did you do?" "We're just trying to make this fantasy thing come true for you, all right?" "The girls think we went bowling." "I don't think Hannah would like this." "DAVE:" "What?" "ANDREW:" "I don't think she would like this." "I think that this would upset her." "Are you kidding me about this?" "You asked her to sleep with you and her girlfriends." "You think..." "You think she's gonna get upset at this?" "That's different." "Hey, what is wrong with you, man?" "What is..." "I don't wanna do it." "Well, you are gonna fucking do it because they're here and you're gonna do it." "Those are like truck stop hookers, man." "They're miserable." "Hey, you know what?" "You know what?" "They're miserable." "Those are human beings and you need to learn some fucking gratitude." "I'm feeling really misunderstood right now." "I'm gonna hit you in the face so hard when you come out." "You already did that, motherfucker, with a rock." "DAVE:" "Hey." "Hey, what's the problem?" "I'm not a sex addict." "I'm not a fucking, like, porn addict." "I'm trying to fix something that is broken inside of me." "I have a dream of getting touched, and of getting rocked, and of, yeah, of getting fucked by some special women" "Okay." "Do you hear the words that are coming out of your mouth right now?" "Can you hear those words?" "Owen." "He's what..." "He's using psycho-babble to try to fuck our girlfriends, dude." "I don't think..." "That's not what I'm doing." "Yes, you are." "You shut your face and fuck those hookers." "You fucking do it." "No." "No, motherfucker." "You think this is my fantasy, huh?" "You think this is my dream?" "Andy, please." "We paid for this." "Just give it a try." "What's your name?" "I'm Miss Cum Police." "I'm here to confiscate your cum." "Don't do it, man." "What?" "We gotta be done with this shit." "You gotta stop trying to fuck Hannah." "What?" "I'm not even talking to your conscious mind right now," "I'm talking to your sub-conscious and I'm telling it to not fucking do it." "(CLEARS THROAT)" "Hmm." "I asked Zoe to marry me." "When?" "Right before we got here." "What did she say?" "She hasn't yet." "Uh-oh." "Yikes." "No, not yikes." "Not yikes." "Yes, yikes." "When were you going to tell us?" "It's just..." "It's just time, you know." "I just did it." "It's just..." "It was just time to man up, you know?" "It's grow up time." "Yes." "I'm not saying..." "Really nice." "Hi." "How was bowling?" "Hey." "Oh, it was good." "Can I have this?" "Yeah." "Well, what's wrong with Andrew?" "Nothing, he's good." "Hello." "Hi." "Oh, hey, buddy." "How's it going?" "Good, good." "You?" "I'm okay." "I'll let you do your..." "No, no, no, no." "Stay for a minute, let's visit." "House treating you well?" "Yeah, great." "We like it a lot." "Good, good." "Yeah." "No disturbances at the house?" "Nope." "Yeah, good." "An old man came by looking for his dog." "That's Bear." "That's the best dog in the world." "He belongs to crazy Old Man Carl, but I love him like my own." "Sweet dog." "You met him?" "Yeah." "Yeah, I miss that dog." "I had to move out when the wife and I split, but that's a whole different bowl of wax." "Look at you." "Come here." "Mmm." "There we go." "That's the guy." "Okay." "Yeah." "(SIGHS)" "You gone out to the park yet?" "Not yet." "Oh, okay." "Lost Horse Mine, Wonderland, the Teddy Bears, you got it?" "Oh, now you do." "All right." "Bye." "(MUSIC PLAYING IN PUB)" "Can I have a tequila and two beers?" "WOMAN:" "Oh-oh!" "Thanks." "Hey, baby." "Hello." "You want a beer?" "Sure." "Thank you." "Here you go." "Oh, thank you." "Okay." "My mom died." "Mine, too." "Recently?" "I don't know." "Maybe 10 years ago." "My husband left me." "That's really hard." "I'm so sorry." "He's in there." "I want him back." "I miss him so bad. (CRYING)" "Well, maybe he doesn't deserve you." "You know?" "He's a bastard." "You hear that, you're a bastard." "You think I care about you?" "I'm gonna fuck you." "I'm gonna fuck you so hard, cowboy, I'm gonna fuck you in my cowboy hat till I make you scream." "I'll ride your dick off." "You motherfucker." "(HICCUPS)" "With my hat on." "I..." "I have to get back inside." "Thank you so much for the..." "Okay?" "Mmm." "You..." "You..." "You take care, darling." "You too, you too." "(CRYING)" "Hey." "Make sure your husband knows how important you are." "And don't be afraid to ask him what you need." "Even if it's not popular." "Wow." "Thank you, baby." "(DOOR OPENS)" "Light." "Okay." "Light." "Now what?" "What are we doing?" "DAVE:" "Watch out, move." "Yeah." "What're you guys doing?" "We're going to bed." "Aah!" "Don't talk." "Don't talk." "ZOE:" "Okay." "Where are you going?" "Outside." "For fun." "Why?" "For fun?" "For fun." "You..." "Here you go, dirty fellow." "Yes." "You know, you are a real asshole, Grously." "You know, you're a real selfish dick." "Yeah, you're a selfish dick, you are." "You are." "Do you know you're a selfish dick?" "Can you hear, fucking piece of shit?" "(WHISPERING) You're a fucking piece of shit." "You're a dirty, filthy, useless piece of shit, aren't you?" "Aren't you?" "Aren't you filthy?" "You okay?" "Hmm." "Okay, come here." "I'm sorry." "Seriously?" "I'm not..." "I..." "You don't need..." "I'm not like a fucking, like, desperate housewife, okay?" "You don't need to fuck me till I need to feel better." "I'm sorry." "I'm high and I..." "I'm fine." "Yeah." "I..." "Emily." "(GROANS)" "Can you..." "It's bedtime." "Yeah, it's bedtime." "I don't wanna wake." "Hey, Emily, It's, um..." "Let's go to bed." "(EMILY GROANS)" "Just one quick walk." "Okay." "All right, it's bedtime." "Goodnight." "Goodnight, you guys." "Dave." "Mmm?" "Dave." "(GROANS)" "Shh." "You fell asleep while making breakfast." "Fuck you." "Are we good?" "Yeah, we're good." "Yeah?" "Good." "Now I can go back to sexing my girlfriend without looking over my shoulder." "Wait, what?" "What did you mean by we're good?" "Meant that you're gonna stop trying to fuck our girlfriends." "Oh, no." "That's not over." "I thought you were talking about the whores." "Oh..." "Oh, you..." "You thought I was apologizing." "Yeah." "Jesus, shit!" "That was not cheap, man." "It should have been." "I know." "You should have checked with Yelp!" "They don't..." "You can't do that on Yelp." "Sorry." "Go for it." "Thank you." "Hey." "Um, I think we're gonna leave." "Think I'm gonna stay here." "Do you not wanna go hiking?" "Stay here and read." "Okay, let's go." "HANNAH:" "Okay." "(DOG BARKING)" "EMILY:" "Well, at least we get to go hiking, right?" "DAVE:" "It's getting crazy out here." "(DOG BARKING)" "EMILY:" "Come on." "OWEN:" "He's hiding the dog." "What?" "He's hiding that dog in the guesthouse." "What?" "Oh." "No, no, no, no." "No, no, no." "No, no, no, no, no, no, no." "No." "Oh, my God." "It's too much, we gotta do something." "We're trying to do something." "I hope he's been feeding it at least." "HANNAH:" "Can we please stop talking about it?" "I'll take care of it." "ANDREW:" "Yeah, we're fat." "We're fat." "Eating like this, Grously." "We're fat fuck." "Ugly motherfucker." "You probably suck your own dick." "Motherfucker Grously." "(SIGHS)" "You fucking dick." "You're a dick." "It's just too cold." "It's just too cold." "Feels weird." "I like it." "Hey, so this is weird, but, um..." "I think somehow that dog from next door got into the guesthouse." "'Cause I heard barking and..." "Went over there and the dog was in there." "OWEN:" "Pushups are not as same as pull-ups, dude." "Anyway, I just let him out and he walked right on home." "OWEN:" "I'm just saying I don't think you have very good upper body strength." "I do have good upper body strength." "(GRUNTS)" "(PANTING)" "HANNAH:" "Has anyone seen Andrew?" "DAVE:" "Andrew." "You know, he's gotta be around here somewhere." "Andrew!" "OWEN:" "Hey, buddy." "DAVE:" "Andrew!" "I don't know, he's not back in the bedroom." "OWEN:" "Where is he?" "DAVE:" "Andrew!" "OWEN:" "I'm gonna go look outside." "(MAN CHANTING)" "DAVE:" "Andrew!" "Andrew!" "I got him." "Hey, hey, buddy." "He's freezing." "Let's get him up." "Come on, man." "Wait, wait, wait." "Come on, buddy." "Come on." "Come on, man." "(STRAINS) Come on." "Wait, wait." "All right, come on." "Come on." "We got you." "DAVE:" "We found him." "(COUGHS AND SHIVERS)" "I'm going to bed." "(GASPS) You're so cold." "Here." "Was he out there all night?" "Yeah." "Where'd you guys find him?" "He was just lying in a ditch." "Oh, my God!" "Andrew." "(SHIVERS)" "You look cold." "(SNIFFLES)" "Fuck you." "Fuck you!" "Fuck you!" "Fuck you." "Fuck... (CRIES)" "Can I have some tea?" "My throat really hurts." "(DOOR CLOSES)" "How does this feel?" "It feels amazing." "Okay, then I'll keep doing that." "Are you going to give up?" "Hmm?" "You're going to give up?" "Are you going..." "Are you going to give up now?" "Now?" "Are you going to accept defeat or are you going to shut the door on defeat?" "You are doing this." "I'm coming over." "I'm walking over to you now." "I'm not strapped to a bomb or anything." "I wanted to ask you something." "Is there a scenario in which you would rub my chest?" "Andrew..." "I will give you $100,000,000 to answer that question honestly." "Okay." "Yes." "Thanks." "Do you know?" "Yes." "No." "I have no idea what you're talking about." "Dave asked me to marry him." "What did you say?" "I haven't said anything." "Well, what do you think?" "Just, I don't want this part of my life to be over." "You know?" "I just want to have fun." "Come here." "ANDREW:" "Thank you." "EMILY:" "Mmm-hmm." "You know what would be scary?" "If that scary old dog came by right now." "That old man's dog?" "What old man?" "Just this dog man." "The dog's name is Grously." "(CHUCKLES) That's a weird name for a dog." "I named him." "(BLOWS AIR)" "I think I'm going to go inside and get another beer." "Does anyone want anything?" "I'll have one." "Thank you." "OWEN:" "Uh-huh." "Yeah, I..." "I'm going to get some wine." "I'll come with you." "Oh, shit!" "Oh, no." "You want to have mine?" "No." "(MOANS)" "(GLASS CLINKS)" "This fire is so hot, we don't even need clothes." "I think I'm going to keep my clothes on, buddy." "I'd rather my pubes not smell like a campfire." "Scotch pubes." "Chipotle BBQ pubes." "(CHUCKLES)" "(ZOE SIGHS)" "This is so nice." "I know." "It is, isn't it?" "(GASPING)" "(MOANS)" "(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)" "(PANTING)" "(WHISPERS) We should go back outside." "Yeah." "Okay." "(CRIES) It's okay, It's okay." "It's okay, it's okay, it's okay." "DAVE:" "Great story, Andrew." "ANDREW:" "What?" "It's a sad fucking story, man." "ZOE:" "It's a really sad story." "ANDREW:" "Yes, I need one of those." "What were you guys doing inside?" "What?" "ANDREW:" "What were you guys doing inside?" "You were in there like forever." "Were you grabbing a snack or something?" "We were fucking." "Yeah." "We were fucking, too, me and Andrew, we were fucking." "Was it hot?" "So hot." "(ALL LAUGH)" "(ANDREW CHUCKLES)" "(FAUCET RUNNING) (DISHES CLANKING)" "Do you need help?" "No." "Oh, well, you just do the dishes and I'll just... (GRUNTS)" "(GROANS)" "(PANTING)" "(SIGHS)" "(KNOCK ON DOOR)" "What?" "ANDREW:" "You're ready for bed?" "I'm coming." "OWEN:" "What are these things?" "EMILY:" "They're called Teddy Bears." "OWEN:" "Well, they don't look like Teddy Bears." "How beautiful they are!" "Yup." "Give me the digits." "(CHUCKLES)" "Um..." "Would you like to have sex with me?" "Did you hear me?" "Sorry, um... (SING-SONG VOICE) I kind of wasn't kidding." "Would you like to have sex with me right now, please?" "Right now?" "Here?" "Mmm-hmm." "Yes." "(ROBOTIC VOICE) Please do me in the..." "No." "the robot butt..." "No, no time for..." "Sorry." "I'm just, I'm out of it." "I'm sorry." "Really?" "No sex for me?" "I mean, you don't see a downside to getting naked and having sex in the..." "With all these..." "Cacti around." "Well..." "I scoped the whole spot over there where there are no cacti." "I'm..." "I want to smash your head into that cactus." "I think it's good for you to talk about how you're feeling." "I hate you." "I know." "I know." "Andrew, do you hear what I'm saying?" "What if we never get through this?" "What if this doesn't end, and then we're just done?" "Then it wasn't meant to be." "(SLURPS)" "LORIE:" "Hey." "Hey." "Baby, what're you doing here?" "Hi." "Where's Rich?" "(SNIFFLES)" "Who?" "Where's Rich?" "Oh, he's not here." "We're..." "We're renting this house." "What?" "(WEEPS) Oh." "Where is he?" "Well, where is he?" "Are you..." "Are you hurt?" "(LORIE SOBS)" "You tell him what I did." "Tell Rich." "Grously." "(GASPS) Grously!" "I just need him so bad." "Grously!" "I need him so bad. (WEEPS)" "Grously!" "No." "Grously." "(LORIE MOANS) Grously." "Who the hell is Grously?" "(WEEPING)" "You killed him." "You killed him, you bitch." "Get..." "HANNAH:" "Andrew?" "Andrew?" "HANNAH:" "Hey." "Is that..." "Is that fucking dog dead?" "DAVE:" "What the fuck did you do?" "Did you kill that dog?" "HANNAH:" "Oh, my God, what..." "EMILY:" "Oh, my God!" "What did you do?" "HANNAH:" "What happened?" "Emily, go inside." "OWEN:" "What the fuck did you do, man?" "DAVE:" "Go inside." "ANDREW:" "I didn't kill it." "I didn't do it." "I didn't kill it." "I didn't kill it, dude." "Get in there, man." "DAVE:" "You're losing your mind, man." "ANDREW:" "I didn't kill it, man." "I didn't kill it." "Get in there." "What do we do?" "I didn't kill Grously." "(CRIES) I didn't kill-kill him." "It was that, uh, crazy lady." "Crazy lady." "Who was at The Palms the other night." "I say we call the cops." "He brought it on himself." "I say we call the cops." "Is no one going to speak to me?" "I don't care what you do, I really don't." "(VOICE BREAKING) Hello?" "Hello?" "Hello?" "I didn't kill the dog..." "The dog." "If you don't call the cops, I'm going to." "I didn't kill the dog!" "I didn't kill the dog." "I didn't, I didn't kill that dog." "I did not kill the dog!" "Stop ignoring me!" "Stop ignoring me." "(KNOCK ON DOOR)" "RICH:" "Hey." "I'm so sorry." "I'm so sorry." "Holy shit, am I sorry?" "(SNIFFLES)" "He was a good dog, huh?" "(SIGHS)" "Lorie called me, and uh..." "She told me what she did." "She's crazy." "Well, she's crazy." "Where is he right now?" "(DOOR OPENS)" "I'm ready." "Uh..." "I'm going to go for a walk I think." "(GROANS)" "Seriously?" "Wha..." "Emily." "(DOOR CLOSES)" "(SIGHS)" "(GASPS)" "I slept with Owen." "(HANNAH SOBS)" "(CONTINUES SOBBING)" "I did..." "I did that." "I did that, Emily." "(CRIES) Andrew." "(CONTINUES CRYING)" "(SNIFFLES)" "(SIGHS)" "Dave?" "It's okay." "Dave." "Dave, where are you?" "What're you doing?" "Emily, I'm just..." "Don't just leave like this, okay?" "Let's just talk about it." "Let me explain what happened." "I..." "Listen..." "Don't..." "Please don't, please don't just leave like this." "Please don't." "Just..." "Can you just sit down and talk to me for two minutes?" "Please don't just leave." "(CRIES)" "Please don't just... (DOOR CLOSES)" "ZOE:" "Emily." "I'm so sorry." "Thank you." "I got to go." "(CAR ENGINE STARTS)" "Dave?" "What are you doing?" "What are you doing?" "Stop it!" "Stop!" "I have to go!" "No." "(GROANS) Argh!" "(PANTS)" "You have to promise me that you will never, ever, ever leave me." "Okay." "Yes." "Yes?" "Yes." "Yes?" "Yes." "We're going to get out of this hole." "We're going to get out of this hole." "(SNIFFLES)" "(SIGHS)" "(SIGHS)" "(SNIFFLES)" "(SNIFFLES)" "(LAUGHS)" "I'm going to kill you." "No, don't kill me."