"Season 20 Episode 09 Lisa the Drama Queen" "Worst couch gag ever~" "Why do we have to go to the rec center?" "I wanna play with my friends." "When you're older, you'll miss these fun activities." "You're older." "Why don't you do these fun activities?" "Uh, cause no one's making me." "Bye bye." "Welcome to Shaolin Kung Fu." "Ten thousand years of knowledge will be passed on to those whose parents have signed the permission slip." "Rest of you have just purchased very expensive pajamas." "Namaste(Ó¡¶È"°?" ")" "Pardon me, master." "But what does a big fat wad like you know about Kungfu?" "Uh, Kungfu is not about phisique." "But the channelling of ones energy or Qi." "If you doubt my skill, please feel free to attack at my signal." "Ooh!" "My Qi!" "Do we have any more paints?" "My orange isn't the orange of that orange." "Just paint the damn fruit." "Lower your expectation, Lisa." "Perfect program...perfect program..." "Mmm-hmm." "Mmm-hmm." "Mmm-hmm" "Stop!" "Stop!" "Juliet, this is terrible, your art is personally wrong!" "I was painting with my heart." "And if you look carefully, you can see that the knight is Josh Groban, our young centry's greatest vocalist." "Oh!" "Another Grobanite." "Umm, excuse me." "But I think her painting is very imaginative." "I suppose you'd like to teach this class." "Yes, I would." "Class, everyone please stop and admire juliet's painting." "I do not need this!" "My family owns a gas station." "If you two thoughtful and creative girls don't like the way i teach." "There's a world of fun outside." "See ya." "What are you staring at?" "Everyone paint me 20 laps." "Come on fatty." "Keep up." "So how come I've never seen you around the *** rec center before?" "My father just took a position at Springfield University." "Are your parents academics?" "Huh...kinda." "Let's do some Groban." "[singing]" "I need some candy for our fisrt play date, but I don't wanna come on too strong." "MMs?" "Well, if i pick plain, she'll think I'm cheap." "But if I pick peanut, she may have an allergy." "You just killed her, Bart!" "How about Charles***?" "What is it?" "****, don't you see stuff?" "You asked for my help, then you don't want it." "Excuse me, but why not consider a Norman Joy?" "It looks like you only bought something for yourself." "But then you just have fun to have two pieces." "Finally, a real suggestion." "If she doesn't like coconut, you're screwed!" "Mmm..." "Oh..." "Hi, juliet." "So what do you want to do?" "I don't know." "It's been so long since i've had a play date." "Not that i couldn't get one if i wanted, I..." "My parents bought me a membership card to the fake art museum." "Does it get you into special exhibits?" "On Wednesdays." "That's today!" "So Lisa asked if her new friend could stay for dinner." "She's finally doing something the book said she would." "Won't last." "Hey mom!" "Can Juliet sleep over?" "Are your parents ok with that?" "They never met us." "We could be murderers." "Could have been if we hadn't had kids." "Juliet's father is the world's foremost John *** scholar." "He found several undiscovered plot twists in the client, and he proved that the real villan in our time to kill is the leagal system itself." "Told you, Marge." "Told ya!" "Now we need a name for our imaginary kingdom." "I.." "I mean "queendom"." "How about equalia?" "Equalia~where everyone is equal, but we're in charge." "I mean somebody has to be, right?" "Ok, you two." "Lights out." "Lisa, do you want to be best friends?" "Gosh, this is all happening so fast, I don't know what to say." "Say yes!" "Say yes!" "I'd love to." "Woo hoo!" "Good night, Lisa." "I have a best friend!" "You heard me say that, didn't you?" "I did." "We're still cool, alright?" "We are." "My best friend is so cool." "Mom, I'm meeting Juliet after school." "Great, here are a few best friend tips." "Compliment her hair and shoes." "If her dog bites you, don't make a big deal out of it." "Friendship is like marriage." "The key is listening." "Also, if her dog bites you... don't make a big deal out of it." "I just said that." "Ok, honey." "If it is that important to you, you said it." "Mmm..." "We're at the end of chapter 4." "But we need a grabber, a whammy, a snaproo, some I-muster..." "I got it." "How about this?" "What if Queen *** found a rare two-horned unicorn?" "A twonicorn~" "Oh, I love your accent, twonicorn~" "You're definitely doing the book on tape." "And Queen *** and *** hid their beloved twonicorn from the hungry ogre, Homerony~" "Girls are so lame." "Isn't that right, headless starvader?" "What's that?" "You missed your girl friend armless Malibu Stacey wrapped in hockey tape?" "Remember, Juliet's family is very classy." "So be on your best behavior." "Use as many big words as possible." "I call computer." "Bart, you can have doorbell." "Mmuh..." "Nice doorbell, is it computerized?" "Hey, that wha..." "Homer." "Uh.." "Uh...we..." "I" "You come up with an excuse." "Homer, isn't it wonderful that my Juliet and your Lisa have become such fast friends?" "Huh huh...if you say so my lord." "Dinner is ready." "If you show me to your bath room, I'd like to pretend to wash my hands." "Ah, new friendship." "So full of promise." "Much like a young Mitch McTeer in John *** the firm." "When they make a movie for this book, does *** free tickets?" "It depends on the production company." "He had much to be happy about." "A brilliant mind and a solid body that did not gain weight." "and needed little sleep." "Attention, everyone." "Lisa and would like to perform a medley of Josh Groban's twelve most popular downloads." "Juliet, I'm worried this Josh Groban is becoming a bit of an obsession for you." "Let's just listen to James Horner soundtrack to the The Pelican Brief(ÌÁ¶ì°µÉ±Áî), shall we?" "Ah, track three, researching the brief." "I hate track three." "I hate it!" "I hate it!" "(sobbing)" "I'll go get her." "Could you take a look at the lump on my back?" "I'm not that kind of doctor." "Oh, I get it." "Here's ten bucks." "Mmm, that's chewing gum." "What a racket!" "Juliet, are you ok?" "I am now." "Don't you see them?" "See who?" "Our friends, the lords, the ladies of Equalia." "Juliet, you're scaring me just a litte..." "Oh, *** queen ****, we're so glad you're finally here." "I'm a giraffopus, I'm uncomfortable in water and on land." "Oh, a twonicorn!" "Toss me the treat." "I didn't know I could do that." "And now hit shuffle on the royal mypod." "[Josh Groban "so she dances"]" "These be mini pizzas made from dragon eggs, your majesties." "Mom, please don't do that." "Who is this mom of which you speak?" "Mom, stop!" "This is our thing, not yours." "Um, I'm just trying to...." "It's better if you don't." "Mr and Mrs Simpson, we need to talk about lisa." "She's unfocused, scribbling nonsense, living in the world of her own." "Huh huh huh, that's Bart for you." "We're talking about Lisa, your daughter." "Seems like you and I are always talking about Bart, my son." "Lisa has been seeing an awful lot of her new friend" "Ah yes." "The one I've seen on Lisa's facebook page." "I search all the children's facebook pages for unflattering references to me." "By the way, I enjoy the photos of your trip to your sanity." "Huh huh that." "We were actually just going out for brunch and I get lost." "But don't worry officer." "We'll definitely have a talk with the boy." "I can't see Juliet anymore?" "I thought you wanted me to have a best friend." "There are limits to how much two people should be together." "Well, you can't keep Juliet and me apart!" "I'll..." "I'll disobey!" "I'm Bart Simson's mother." "You think you've got any tricks I haven't seen?" "Bart Simpson, age three." "Bart Simpson, age ten." "Juliet, what're you doing here?" "I'm running away, and you're coming with me." "I'd love to!" "Oh, but I'm supposed to attend the model UN this weekend." "I'm the delicate from Azerbaijan, and I'm threatening a rice tariff." "Lisa, I know how important the model UN's work is." "But Equalia needs you, I need you." "Ok, best friend." "I remember when I was young, and I ran off to a land of equality." "Name." "Dr." "William McDougle." "From now on, you're ground keeper Willy." "Next." "This is where we'll live." "How did you find this place?" "My family ate here last week, it really went downhill fast, but if you just believe, any place can be Equalia." "Oh no, clam-elot is closed." "Um, I'm not surprised." "That clam cheddar smells like sope." "I wonder if Lisa has threaten the model UN with the rice tariff yet." "I doubt it." "Friday is usually just comedy assignments and procedure old rules." "Mrs. Simpson!" "Hi ya, Martin." "How's the model UN?" "Total chaos." "We're two minutes away from a roll call vote on the nonbinding resolution, and no Azerbaijan!" "Are you saying that Lisa's not there?" "To the extent you can trust the word of a Belgian, yes!" "Lisa ran away, and it's all my fault." "If I just let her continue her obsessive relationship with that troubled little girl," "Everything would have been fine." "If I know my sister, and unfortunately i do." "She probably ran off to some lamo, make-believe castle." "A castle?" "I know where they are!" "Wait!" "Is it some place I'd have to put on a tie?" "No!" "Is it a place I'd look overdressed if I did wear a tie?" "You probaly would." "What about a jacket and jeans with a nice T-shirt?" "Just go!" "You know what I think killed this place." "No one wanted to drive to the middle of the forest for clams." "Let's go get me a little girl." "My family's here!" "She's not here?" "Girls in our hideout?" "Now they'll tell where we go to stash our stolen peaches." "And to wait out our bad haircuts." "We'd better tie them up" "This place is where we came after my bar mitzvah." "You said you weren't having one." "Uh, it was just family." "All these pictures of see food are making me hungry." "We'll get some cream for the peaches while you guard the prisoners." "Don't screw it up, buttbrain." "At least my dad didn't smoke after his stroke." "Juliet, I'm scared." "Shut your eyes, and you'll be in Equalia." "Equalia is not real!" "Maybe not, but it's better than this." "So the armies of the nomes and the elves faced off on either side of the hollow broad access poised." "With the fearsome cry, they raise towards the center of the battle field banners are flat in the breeze." "What comes next?" "A battle to determine the fate of Equalia, but you wouldn't be interested." "I have a wide variety of interests." "Is there them dragon things?" "Isn't that a little cliched?" "Yes!" "I mean yes." "There are dragons, everywhere." "Green ones, Chinese ones, chubby bold ones." "I like those ones." "Tell me about those." "And so the queens..." "And the me dragon... dance the minuet of equality on a gossamer dew drop." "Whuh!" "What's going on here?" "What's this?" "An ambicious first novel by the two brightest young writers this site of the **** work shop" "I bet it'll burn up good~" "Put the book down." "Why should we, butt brain?" "For equalia!" "Well, it looks like we're safe." "Looks like~huh" "Juliet, I don't wanna go to Equalia anymore." "What do you mean?" "It's a special place, but I need to live in the real world." "The real world?" "The real world is for people who can't imagine anything better." "Goodbye, Lisa." "Goodbye, Juliet." "Cuckoo~" "We have received your manuscript The Chronicles of Equalia" "Sounds promising so far~" "Unfortunately, it is not what we're looking for at this time." "Thank you for thinking of us." "Re-jected!" "You got a letter all the way from New York City, and that's something." "And you know what else sweetie." "You and your friend, princess nutjob inspired me to write my own fantasy novel based on my experiences as a dad." "Ok, Chapter 1, Uh..." "UH..." "Oh~Writing is hard!" "Ladies and gentlemen, fall out boy!"