"Dinner's ready, kids." "Oh, boy!" "Eggs, yum!" "I slave all day trying to keep this caravan" "Tidy for your father" "And look at what you've done!" "What's he done this time?" "He's been using his imagination again!" "It's a drawing of our family, daddy." "What are us Crumpkins?" "We're parts people!" "We don't make things up!" "We take things to pieces!" "Always have, always will!" "5, 4, 3, 2, 1..." "Ping!" "Sleep in, eh, Barry?" "Scrambled- Just how you like 'em." "Eggs..." "Beats me how anyone can eat them." "Yaaiiiee!" "Unh!" "Aah!" "Stay." "Don't panic!" "Oh!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Right!" "Oh!" "Ah-Choo!" "Hello?" "Aah!" "Oooh!" "Hello?" "Nice one." "Heh heh." "It's the neighbors." "Oh, mate, this is Jenny." "Hello." "Oof!" "Heh." "Look, there!" "Eggs!" "Eggs!" "♪ eggs, eggs, eggs, eggs ♪" "♪ eggs poached and scrambled ♪" "♪ fried and quiched ♪" "♪ eggs ♪" "♪ eggs ♪" "Jesus, what a shitty fridge." "Anyway, back to me," "Here I am, mid-Thirties," "And I've finally realized my heart belongs in eggs." "You don't know how long" "I've waited to hear that, Duxton." "I mean, you have had such a dubious career path." "Kelvin, that's all behind me." "I'm totally hip to health now." "That's where this new century is going," "That's where I'm coming from." "I thought Roger fixed that." "He did." "Roger's our..." "Maintenance man." "Roger!" "Gymbal's jammed on number 3 yolk analyzer!" "Good as fixed, bob!" "Ooh!" "I understand you're the firm's biz wiz." "Just the accountant." "The boss here tells me" "You're well hung in the frontal lobe department." "So, happy with turnover, professor?" "It's been falling, but we're confident" "Things are really going to pick up in the next quarter." "That's what they said about the roman empire." "Profit isn't everything." "Thank you, Lyndon." "Duxton..." "I respect the egg." "This humble sphere has sustained human kind" "Through the ascent of civilization." "It's the symbol of life" "Natural, nutritious, perfect." "Our customers are like family..." "And a man's family deserves the best." "Right, audrey?" "The firm's policy has always been" "To value the quality of the egg." "What about the quality of your bottom line?" "Conservatism is the enemy of the entrepreneur!" "If the wright brothers didn't take a few risks," "There'd be no such thing as frequent flyer points." "Think about it." "Help!" "Ooh!" "Aah!" "Whoa!" "2 million free range eggs a day." "There we are." "There's the pair of leghorn layers daddy gave you." "How did you turn those 2 scrawny birds" "Into the biggest free range egg empire in the country?" "Love." "Love your customers..." "Love your workers..." "Love your chickens." "Beautiful." "So, what say I..." "Start you off as" "President of the company." "Ha ha!" "Well, with that kind of ambition," "Maybe one day you'll" "That day is today." "You're resigning, making me head rooster." "Just sign where I've marked." "Why would I do that?" "Eggs are my life." "Well, I'm poaching your factory." "Now sign." "Over my dead body." "That is your option." "I'm not scared of you." "Is that so?" "Maybe your girlfriend here..." "Would like a manicure." "No!" "I'll sign!" "But you're no longer a brother of mine." "Cool." "That'll save me a christmas card." "Kelvin wouldn't just leave without saying good-Bye." "Goes to show how unimportant employees are to management." "Maybe kelvin's brother would be good for the company." "I don't know." "He seems kind of scary to me." "Hey, you!" "Hey!" "What a loser." "No!" "Get me wheels!" "You can't just dump kelvin's fridge." "It's a rare 1959 freezemaster deluxe." "It's a classic valve model." "It's a disgrace." "These old refrigerators are an environmental nightmare." "They leak fluorocarbons into the ozone layer." "But the sum of its parts" "Is worth more than the whole fridge!" "I could dismantle it and" "Hey!" "Fella!" "We've only got one planet!" "But dumping's wasteful." "Why not recycle it?" "Recycle?" "From here, the scrap goes to the blast furnace for meltdown." "Straight to oblivion." "Beautiful." "Top of the range, state of the art," "Twin door, auto defrost, arctic prince 2000!" "He said he used to be a top executive" "For one of the biggest corporations in the world." "Then he told me he's come up with a vitamin-Enriched" "Hen food that'll produce super-Healthy eggs." "We should be reducing costs, not increasing them." "He's a fiscal playboy." "He'll destabilize our company." "But if his new chicken feed is even healthier," "Our chooks'll be happier" "So they'll lay more humpties." "What are we having for dinner tonight?" "I can cook anything you like," "As long as it's chicken." "I like tandoori chicken." "I like sweet and sour chicken." "I like garlic chicken." "I like southern fried chicken." "Good girl." "I like hawaiian chicken." "I love barbecued chi-Hold it!" "What?" "Where is that fleabag hitching a ride to?" "She needs a place to crash." "So get her a room at the pound." "She's lonely without kelvin." "He just deserted her." "Dogs have got feelings, too." "Haven't you, audrey?" "You know, Roger, you have so much love to give..." "If you could just find the right woman." "I found her, Lyndon." "I mean a female of your own species." "And now I'm hot" "A man's roses" "Bawk!" "Bawk!" "Bawk!" "Ha." "Whoo." "Hey, how about we hit the clubs tonight?" "What for?" "You're a hot-Blooded testosterone-Pumping male." "Sorry." "I'll be too busy." "Doing what?" "My hobby." "Roger, taking stuff apart is not a hobby." "What you've got is a compulsive-Obsessive" "Dismantling fixation." "If you ask me, it's you that's falling apart." "You need to get out, get a life." "Live a little." "Who'd look after audrey and Barry?" "Well, for one evening," "A dog and a goldfish can amuse themselves." "Well, don't look at me, I'm not a dog person." "Lyndon..." "You know I'm not very good with gi" "Gi" "Come on, Roger, you can say it." "Girls!" "♪ suck it ♪" "You know, babe, I'm a..." "Sucker for a well-Cut uniform." "Oi!" "Seiko." "What did you call me?" "He called you a psycho." "No..." "Your watch- Seiko." "Heh." "378 parts in those babies." "Main spring, rocker arm, spindle clips," "Timing gear, winder shaft" "I'm meeting somebody." "But i..." "Could do with a drink while I'm waiting." "2 margueritas." "Make 'em doubles." "Thanks, but I don't drink much." "Relax." "They're both for me." "And for you, ace?" "Milkshake." "Make it vanilla." "So, you're interested in parts." "Yep." "See ya." "Are you here by yourself?" "No." "I'm with him." "Fag." "Huh?" "Ah, no, thanks." "I don't smoke personally." "You're not one of those anti-Smoking fascists, are you?" "Yes." "I mean, no." "Go ahead, then." "Uh..." "Filter, filter wrap, outer wrap, tobacco." "That's about it." "4 parts." "Don't mind if I do." "Just the one." "♪ I'm the godfather of cool ♪" "♪ I'm hyper-Sexual ♪" "♪ it's autobiographical ♪" "Mmm." "♪ why I'm the godfather of cool ♪" "♪ I'm a skinny frickin' mess ♪" "Takes 7 seconds for the nicotine to reach the brain," "Stimulate the neurons," "And create a brief euphoric sensation." "♪ oh, my god, what's next?" "♪" "Cool." "In some cases, the brain can develop" "An instant addiction after just one cigarette." "♪ never learned in class ♪" "So, do you find people who smoke attractive?" "Ah!" "Moron!" "Roger?" "Do you know this dweeb?" "No." "Are you kidding?" "Pff." "Come on, you guys." "I only went out for a few hours." "Hmm." "Holy moley, the last steak Duxton cooked" "Was so tough he had to spend an hour..." "What do you call it, duxy?" "Masticating." "No, not that." "I meant chewing it up." "Do me a favor, chicken." "Don't ever change." "Bon soir, hanson." "Ca va?" "Trés bien." "Merci, monsieur chevalier." "The chateau de sade." "Is it to your taste?" "It's slightly corked." "Take it back." "I can cook just about anything," "So long as it's an omelet." "You know, before we met, Sunday won" "The bucket flats chicken sexer of the year award." "And the 1998 winner is Sunday Valentine!" "Twice actually." "1999 winner is..." "Sunday Valentine!" "Ugh." "Not again." "What the hell is a chicken sexer?" "A person who checks chickens" "To see if they've got nuggets or not!" "That was a long time ago." "Sunday was the princess of poultry." "Too bad she's got a brain to match." "Hang on, you lot!" "You got to admit..." "She does have a cute little ass!" "I don't like it when you're like this!" "Sunday, it was a joke." "Very funny." "Not." "Who's asking you?" "If it wasn't for me," "You'd still be up to your tits in chicken shit." "Without me, you're nothing going nowhere." "I'm trying to do something worthwhile with my life." "Of course you are." "Sunday's involved" "In her own very important scientific" "Research program, aren't you, chicken?" "Yes." "Trying to make contact with little green men." "I study the cosmos!" "I'm not a chicken!" "And I don't need you!" "That's that!" "Whoo!" "Oh!" "She'll come groveling back." "Always does." "And when you do, get some decent shoes!" "Ok, boys, fun's over." "Vern, I need to know I've got a steady supply." "No worries, dude." "We're sitting on a stockpile the size of everest." "Is that you, Lyndon?" "Aah!" "Whoa!" "What are you doing in this apartment?" "I live here!" "No, you don't!" "You're a prowler!" "In pajamas?" "This is my friend's place, and she's a police person!" "And she'll be back any minute!" "Now get out!" "Sorry." "I'm always doing something like this." "I must have wandered into" "Wait a minute!" "These are my things!" "That's my goldfish!" "Hello!" "Apartment 91!" "Maybe your tag's upside-Down." "Heh." "16." "Holy moley!" "How embarrassing." "Sorry." "Oh!" "I've been having a little trouble with my tap." "Huh?" "Hmm." "Where'd you learn plumbing?" "Didn't." "Where I come from," "If something doesn't work, you just fix it." "No biggie." "You're incredible with your hands." "Well, I've never seen a man use a banana like that before." "Bye." "No good with g" " G-Girls, eh?" "Lyndon!" "She was just fixing my plumbing." "Aah!" "Go to your room!" "So you found the place ok?" "No problem." "Eee!" "Ha ha ha!" "Come on!" "Oh!" "Don't you just long to be" "Back in bucket flats sexing chickens?" "Not!" "Not!" "â™ª a day never passes â™ª â™ª we don't check out chickens' asses â™ª" "What is it?" "Man trouble?" "Yeah." "Men are from mars." "Uranus, more likely." "Except for wayne." "He's totally supportive." "Can you believe we've been living together" "For almost a year?" "You know the secret of a good relationship?" "Loyalty." "Ohh, thank you, wayne." "Now, go on back to your room, big boy." "My big boy." "So, what now?" "You going back to bucket?" "Well, no." "There's nothing but chooks back there." "I mean, you got out and achieved something with your life." "Yeah." "Dealing with chicken shit every day" "Was perfect training for becoming a cop." "I guess I still have to find out who I am" "And why we're here..." "And the meaning of-Of..." "Of everything." "How long is this gonna take?" "This sleepover thing's only for a night or two, right?" "Oh, yeah." "It's just until I find a job." "Radio:" "weather jocks are saying" "It's the sizzlingest scorcher this summer" "And the forecast for the morning?" "Hot, hot, hot!" "â™ª ole, ole â™ª â™ª I'm feelin' hot, hot, hot â™ª" "â™ª I'm feelin' hot, hot, hot â™ª â™ª I'm feelin' hot, hot, hot â™ª" "â™ª feelin' hot, hot, hot â™ª" "Some pathetic sardine can." "You've got to get yourself something more practical." "Yeah." "A big v-8 1950's convertible." "Now, there's a piece of automotive poetry." "Huh." "As if." "Cuba-That's the place for you." "Why?" "They haven't been able to import cars there" "For 40 years," "So the streets are frozen in time" "With 1950's auto americana." "Cuba sounds like car heaven." "Since when did you start sucking the gaspers?" "â™ª I'm in love with my car â™ª â™ª some people may laugh â™ª â™ª but it's all right â™ª" "I thought you fixed the brakes!" "I did!" "Ohh!" "Aah!" "â™ª don't be afraid â™ª â™ª of me â™ª" "Aah!" "Aah!" "â™ª it's not unusual â™ª â™ª to fall in love with your vehicle- â™ª" "Gee, I thought this thing had airbags." "Tomorrow, I'm catching the bus." "Wow!" "Check out all these great parts." "Don't even think about it." "This place is weird." "Roger, come on!" "What do you suppose it means?" "Well, that's a volkswagen hubcap." "Oh, no..." "It's not a hubcap." "I might not know much about much, but I know about parts." "This here's an early 60's vw bug cap." "Ooh!" "So, how did a hubcap" "Get imbedded in a million-Year-Old rock?" "Hmm." "It's yours now." "Heh." "Whoops!" "I'm ringing about the job cleaning motel rooms." "A university degree in hospitality?" "Hello, I'm ringing about the cleaning job" "Hello, my name is Sunday Valentine, and I'm" "Hello-I'm calling about- Yes, hello" "That new vitamin-enriched chook feed of yours" "Is a hit with our chickens." "First farm figures in indicate" "This morning's egg count has gone ballistic!" "That's great." "Really great." "Is something up?" "My girlfriend chucked a wobbly" "And hasn't come home for days." "She must have another guy!" "I mean, why else would she leave?" "Well, perhaps she needed you to express" "More of your vulnerable, sensitive side." "You really think so?" "It's possible." "The bitch!" "Hello there!" "Oh!" "How's your pipes?" "Mmm." "Holy moley, I feel like such a drip" "For barging in on you." "You must have thought I was completely nuts." "No." "You're not completely nuts." "You're not nuts at all." "Sunday Valentine." "Roger Crumpkin." "Unh!" "Ooh." "Better get back to it." "Heh." "Me, too." "Do you ever think about space?" "Oh, yeah." "I'd like to have a lot more of it" "In my apartment." "Whoa!" "There are more stars in the universe" "Than there are grains of sand" "On all the beaches in all the world." "Wow, you're really smart." "Nobody ever said anything like that to me before." "Well, they should have." "You're not making fun of me, are you?" "No." "Do you think we're alone?" "I mean, in the universe." "Uh..." "Up here, it's like we're floating through the galaxy." "My dream is to..." "You'll probably think this is silly." "No." "Tell me." "My dream is to find proof that we're not the only" "Speck of intelligent life in the cosmos." "Imagine, if there were other thinking beings out there..." "Our tiny, little planet wouldn't seem so lonely." "It'd be nice not to be lonely." "What are us Crumpkins?" "We're parts people!" "We don't make things up!" "We take things to pieces!" "Always have, always will!" "No dinner!" "And you can stay out there" "Until all this imagination nonsense" "Is washed out of your silly little head!" "I never used my imagination again." "â™ª moon river â™ª â™ª off to see the world â™ª â™ª there's such a lot of world â™ª â™ª to see â™ª" "â™ª we're after â™ª â™ª the same â™ª â™ª rainbow's end â™ª" "I couldn't help myself." "I'm a shopaholic." "Well, at least you went out" "And bought something to cheer yourself up." "Mmm." "So, um, any nibbles?" "It's like you need a doctorate in stamp-Licking" "To get a crummy post office job!" "Hey, no offense," "But you're never gonna get anywhere dressed like that." "Anyway, um..." "Until you score a gig," "My dump is your dump." "Oh, thanks, Rikki." "You're a real pal." "Of course, I need some rent money." "Uh... of course." "Ah!" "Ohh!" "What do you think?" "It's the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen." "Careful." "I don't want egg on it." "Melons?" "A psychiatrist would have a field day with all this." "My lunch?" "It's sexy." "It's very sexy." "All curved food." "And what about this hubcap" "That you're totally obsessed with?" "It's curved, isn't it?" "See, jung said an obsession with curved objects" "Indicates an uncontrollable flowering of the senses." "I'm not obsessed with curved object" "It's that girl, isn't it?" "You've fallen for her." "No, I haven't." "Yes, you have." "No, I haven't." "Huh?" "Now, look, the secret with women is that" "The secret with women is that you have to show them" "That you're interested in the same things" "They're interested in." "So, what's she into?" "Tennis?" "Hiking?" "Movies?" "Extraterrestrial beings." "Jesus." "And listen to this one!" ""A pizza delivery man from bristol, England," ""Claimed he was abducted for 3 hours" ""Into a parallel universe." ""He said aliens stole 2 salami supreme pizzas" "Then conducted experiments on his sexual organs. "" "I hate that." "Come on, let's go." "Plus there's this whole lift-out guide in here" "To flying saucer spotting." "That'll come in handy." "Oh!" "Roger?" "Help!" "Whoa!" "Help!" "...at a rapid rate of knots is Jason Johnson" "Once again following up his good work..." "Taking number 28." "For pete's sake!" "It's junk!" "We don't know what it is." "It's obviously off an old volkswagen." "Then how come it's not listed" "In any volkswagen parts manual?" "Besides, vw bug caps" "Don't have this beveled lip." "I'll give you a beveled lip." "Not even warm." "This is the key to her heart." "Sunday." "Hi." "Guess what this is." "She'll think I'm an idiot." "I am an idiot." "No!" "I'm not an idiot!" "I am not an idiot!" "I'm not an idiot!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Whoa!" "Aah!" "Whoa!" "What the-Fish?" "Aah!" "Skiing is perfectly safe." "The chances of anything happening are..." "Avalanche!" "Ohh!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Oh, silly mummy, I forgot your bottle." "Waah!" "Excuse me!" "Hey!" "Hello!" "Excuse me!" "Waah!" "â™ª I like to party down on a thursday night â™ª" "Aah!" "â™ª wild going crazy with the crew â™ª" "Hey, where do you think you're going?" "â™ª we do what we want to- â™ª" "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "Huh?" "Huh?" "Huh?" "Huh?" "Is that you, wayne?" "Wayne?" "Who's wayne?" "Aah!" "No!" "Oh, Sunday." "Hi!" "Guess what this is." "Oh." "Sunday." "Hi." "Oh!" "What have you been doing?" "Just putting out the garbage." "Are you ok?" "This is part of an alien spaceship." "I'm pretty sure that was made by the volkswagen people," "Not by martians." "This wasn't made by martians." "They'd be beings" "From way outside our solar system." "You can't cut it, burn it, or dent it." "It's indestructible." "That's german manufacturing for you." "Look, if bits and pieces were falling off spaceships" "All over the city," "Don't you think a few million people" "Would have noticed?" "What if there were no people around?" "One more time?" "Ok." "Imagine this." "A flying saucer crashes to earth" "And sinks into a prehistoric bog." "Bog." "Then a volcano erupts," "And lava buries the alien spaceship" "Under layers of rock." "Right." "And then mankind comes along" "And builds a city on top." "And then one day they're excavating" "To build a skyscraper" "And-And-And then what?" "They almost uncover the space ship." "So, if this hubcap is part of it," "Then the rest of the thing" "Must be buried down there somewhere." "Holy moley, what an imagination!" "Do you really think" "That we can find a flying saucer?" "Huh?" "Another teapot." "Another teapot!" "Call me old-Fashioned," "But I think you're more likely" "To find a flying saucer up there." "Sunday!" "I'm coming!" "This is no teapot." "Perfect oval shape!" "It couldn't be, could it?" "Wow!" "Holy moley!" "Prepare yourself." "What we're about to witness may be too complex" "For the human mind to comprehend." "Oh." "Hmm." "Hmmph." "Bummer." "Major." "But everything points to this being" "Being off an alien spaceship." "Well, if I see a flying saucer" "With only 3 hubcaps, I'll let you know." "It's got to be down here somewhere." "Roger..." "huh?" "Maybe you should give intelligent life" "A rest for a while." "My bad luck is contagious," "And you don't need any more of it." "I've got to go." "Would you like to have dinner tonight?" "No, I can't!" "My life is..." "Well, it's complicated right now." "But you got to eat." "If you're hungry, that is." "Do you think you'll be hungry?" "I'll be starving." "Sunday Valentine," "You look like a dag!" "â™ª feel me, save me â™ª â™ª wear me â™ª" "Hip hip hooray!" "Come on, mr." "Grumpy, blow it out." "Geez, Duxton," "You've got your balls in a knot tonight." "The bitch didn't even send me a card." "Well, maybe she didn't know." "Of course she didn't know!" "Do you think I'd tell her I was turning 40?" "40?" "40?" "Happy birthday from a friend." "Me." "Thanks..." "For caring." "You know, I was fooling myself" "Pretending I'd have a lasting relationship" "With that dumb country kid," "So..." "let's party!" "Yay!" "Yay!" "You sure make that dress look pretty." "Actually, it's my friend's." "I just..." "borrowed it." "But most of all..." "I love your frog-Skin shoes." "Snake-Skin." "Thanks." "They're mine." "They're my favorite!" "Ah-Ha!" "Check 'em out!" "Ha ha!" "Travel much?" "The odd bus trip." "What do you know about cuba?" "Tropical beaches." "Hot music." "Cool people." "Hemingway called it paradise!" "So did Lyndon!" "Who's hemingway?" "A great writer." "He said he didn't need to use fancy $20 words" "To say what he had to say." "That's honest." "And then one day, he felt really, really bad," "So he shot himself!" "That's a bit too honest." "Yeah." "Your uniform is so tight I can hardly breathe." "Hello!" "She is?" "Merci beaucoup, hanson." "She's at mummies." "Alone?" "No." "She's with some guy." "But that's ok." "That's no problem." "Huhh!" "They reckon men and women have different physical needs," "But I read the average is 3 times a week." "It's not how many that counts." "It's all in your technique." "What's your favorite way of doing it?" "I like to beat it..." "Until it gets really stiff..." "Just eat your food, harvey!" "Until it can stand right up by itself." "The stiffer the better as far as I'm concerned." "Then what do you do?" "Well, it's delicious on its own," "Or you can use it for meringues or omelets." "You see, the thing about egg white" "Is it has absolutely no cholesterol!" "You sure know a lot of stuff." "Only about eggs." "I would never have known" "There were 14 parts to that pepper grinder" "Until you pointed them all out." "Ah, I've never been able to talk like this" "With a girl of the opposite sex!" "Me, either." "Well, is it to monsieur's taste?" "Very nice." "If you could be anywhere right now," "Where would you be?" "Here." "Me, too." "Do it now." "Kiss me, mr." "Perfectly right." "Smile!" "Somehow I never pictured you as a smoker." "Oh, I only smoke for taste." "I can give them up anytime." "No worries." "There you go." "I'm cuttin' down already." "Let me help you with that." "No, it's-Ok." "Ah-Choo!" "My earring." "Got him." "Ohh!" "I heard how they fix this." "Oh." "Why don't we just get the bill and split before..." "Whoa!" "Aah!" "Anything else happens." "Ok." "Maybe we should just go get a hot dog." "Holy moley, Rikki!" "Roger!" "Huh?" "I've got to go." "Right." "Come on." "Don't let me down." "Please, just this once." "Yes!" "Ha ha!" "Ohh!" "Bummer." "Major." "Sorry." "Thanks." "I'll get a cab." "Yeah." "You'd better stay away from me." "I'm a catastrophe." "Oh, Roger." "It's not all your fault." "It's-Well..." "It is all your fault," "And... and..." "That's that!" "Taxi!" "Ohh!" "Are you ok?" "Oh." "Crumpkin!" "Ohh." "Mr. Chevalier!" "Are you ok?" "My girl left me." "Same thing just happened to me." "Mine's as cute as a button," "But not very bright." "Oh... mine's real smart." "See, there's your problem right there." "Hey, if napoleon couldn't hang on to his girl," "What hope do a couple of jerks like us got?" "Women." "They're like some alien species" "Living amongst us." "They love to hurt us." "That's why men need business." "Our new eggs" "Hit the supermarket shelves tomorrow." "I hard-Boiled myself a 6-Pack," "And I'd like you to have it." "Oh, thanks," "But I don't actually eat eggs personally, and" "Management can always learn something" "From the little guy on the factory floor," "No matter how simple he may be." "Say, "ah. "" "Ah." "Have a couple more for breakfast." "Drop by my office," "Tell me how you feel about them." "I hope you get your girl back." "You, too." "â™ª been watching so much tv â™ª" "Nice guy." "â™ª I'm thinner than I should be â™ª â™ª I'm like a waterlogged ball â™ª â™ª that no one wants to kick around anymore â™ª" "â™ª an all-Day morning hairdo â™ª â™ª that no comb can get through â™ª" "â™ª I know every tune about guys and girls â™ª â™ª and hurts and hearts and moans â™ª â™ª I miss you like sleep â™ª â™ª and there's nothing romantic about the hours I keep â™ª" "â™ª the mornings when it starts â™ª â™ª I don't look so sharp â™ª â™ª now I've got a heavy heart â™ª" "Well, corporal, my command post is on the 29th floor." "What say I fix my bayonet, and we hit the trenches?" "You know, it's been a nice night, lionel." "Don't spoil it." "It's Lyndon." "Whatever." "See ya." "Man, that army babe was scorching." "Had to hose her down and return her to base." "You make friends so easily." "Oh, yeah." "How'd you do with the space cookie?" "I never got off the ground." "You're never going to pull chicks in that heap." "Hey, sport." "Your consideration for non-Smokers" "Would be appreciated." "Pickle it." "Sorry, Lyndon." "Didn't even realize I was doing it." "That's because the nicotine" "Is messing with your brain's receptors." "I've never been in love before." "Not ever." "You're right." "This is just a" " A lousy hubcap." "What was I thinking?" "Hey, don't worry." "If I know anything about women," "She'll be back." "I love your eyes." "I love your nose." "I love your..." "Ears." "I love your... toes." "Wait a minute." "This is a dream, isn't it?" "Quack!" "Roger, have you seen my laptop?" "Huh?" "Ah... no." "Oh, good luck, murphy." "What's this?" "Your laptop." "Sorry." "Couldn't sleep." "All you ever do is wreck everything!" "Maintenance man?" "What a joke!" "You know, the only reason that you hold down that job" "Is because every day of your life" "I cover for you!" "Passive smoking is carcino-Friggin'" " Genic!" "I tried to quit last night." "I tried everything." "Quit smoker's gum." "Quit smoking pills." "Self-Hypnosis tapes." "Nicotine patches!" "You're pathetic." "No wonder that girl walked out on you." "You've got nothing to offer her." "I love her." "Did you tell her that?" "I don't know how." "Exactly!" "Well, I'm fed up sharing this disintegrating dump" "With the egg-Eating fish" "And the short-Ass sports freak!" "I'm finding my own pad." "That's it." "I'm out of here!" "Lyndon!" "Can we still be friends?" "Bawk!" "Oh, no." "Your "use by" date is up, pal." "Aah!" "Ooh!" "Ohh." "Breakfast, right?" "At least this is good for something." "Breakfast, Barry?" "There you go." "Well, I lost Sunday," "And I lost Lyndon." "But at least I've still got you guys." "Barry!" "No!" "No." "Aah!" "Barry!" "Oh, Barry." "But it's commercial insanity to export." "You're moving way too fast." "When people feel the benefits," "They'll be back for more." "Why would other countries go crazy over our eggs" "When they've got eggs of their own?" "Because I improved the goddamn product." "You're on hold." "Your girl, right?" "Hmm." "How'd you know?" "Because I used to look at my girl just like that." "Listen, last night," "I was feeling pretty sorry for myself," "But you made me realize" "That everybody loses somebody," "And the world still goes on." "But it was my grandmother's." "It must be worth- 50!" "Take it or leave it, love." "Ow!" "Can you fly this monster?" "So, what information do you need from me" "To make this thing happen?" "Sugar?" "I'll need to know" "How many international markets you want to target." "6." "6?" "No, second thoughts, make that 7." "That'd be England, Japan, France," "Germany, Italy, the States, of course," "And I suppose you want a South American market." "What about Argentina?" "Chocolate on top?" "No." "Make it chile." "Ok, chile." "But you know, Duxton," "The more I think about this export gig," "The more I'm worried." "Are you sure you want chili?" "Don't be the conservative little prick" "I always thought you were!" "Just do it!" "Ok." "I said chile, and I mean chile!" "Fine." "But to meet these export figures," "We'll need to buy" "At least another 20 million laying hens!" "More!" "More!" "Make it twice that!" "You know, when Sir Walter Raleigh first brought tobacco to England, the government of the day tried to ban it." "They couldn't handle something that had no other function than to give man pleasure." "We've come a long way since those days, right, Roger?" "Right." "Wrong!" "Same thing's happening all over again." "The tobacco industry's being persecuted." "Cigarette?" "Oh, no, thank you." "Really?" "So, how'd you meet this chick?" "She just barged into my apartment" "And fell on top of me." "Popped the buttons right off my pajamas!" "Ha ha ha ha!" "Oh." "So how's your cappuccino, hmm?" "A little sweet." "A little hot." "Ha." "Going to hit yep." "A few balls?" "Oh, boy." "Ooh!" "Now, don't go blaming yourself for this, Roger." "Ok." "Where does this Sunday girl live?" "In my apartment building" "With her friend." "How did you know her name was Sunday?" "Because she's mine!" "Don't worry." "I'm going to make sure she never hurts any man again." "I just wanted you to know that before you go." "Before I go?" "Ah!" "Huh?" "Big chill time, Crumpkin." "You squashed your own brother!" "Recycled." "What the heck's going on?" "This is why you get the twin door." "Have you got your phone?" "Right." "We can call the cops." "Roger, under pressure, you are a genius." "There's not much power left" "Enough for one call." "Hello?" "Sunday." "You're calling babes?" "You're in Roger." "Deep trouble." "Yeah." "Rikki was pretty steamed about her dress." "It's nice of you to call," "But last night was a mega mistake." "Whatever you do, don't hang up." "Good-Bye." "She hung up." "You know, I've always envied you." "Me?" "You've got it all" "Great personality," "Top job..." "Women love you." "I don't know anything about love." "Come on." "You're always out with a different girl." "That's because they all leave me." "I can never keep a woman." "That's not true." "What about that inflatable one?" "You kept her for years." "Hello." "Lunch?" "No can do." "I've got my hands full downsizing staff." "Before we die," "I just want to shake the hand" "Of the best mate a bloke could ever have." "Lyndon, that's not my hand." "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "You saved my life." "Ooh!" "Sunday!" "I didn't expect to see you again." "Happy birthday." "You remembered." "That's one of the reasons I adore you," "You little minx." "It's not going to work." "One more chance, squirrel." "No." "Where are you going?" "We need to talk, possum, about you and me." "There's nothing to discuss." "I'm not right for anybody." "You're right for me, chicken." "It's over." "Get over it." "Well, then, for old time's sake, fluffy ducky," "At least let me drive you to wherever you're going." "Duxton, just back off!" "Kitty cat," "To be alone with you for even one minute" "Would make me as happy as a pig in poo." "Around you, I'm just a lovesick puppy." "Ok..." "You can drive me, on one condition" "No more stupid animal references." "They really bug me." "Aw, no." "Sunday!" "You know, dux," "There is one positive thing" "That came out of our relationship." "I learned to take control of my life." "Well, that's a good thing." "Hey, this isn't the way to the bus station." "Shortcut." "So, you got yourself a new toy boy?" "What?" "Where'd you get this?" "Doesn't matter." "You're right." "It doesn't matter." "I won't be seeing Roger ever again." "He may seem a little clumsy," "But deep down, he's a genuine" "Aah!" "Holy moley, what was that?" "Just a bump in the road." "No, Duxton, it sounded squashy." "We better check it out." "Back up." "Ok." "Back up." "Ok." "Aah!" "Stop." "We've definitely run over something." "I'm going to check it out." "When you left, it wasn't just my pride you tore apart." "You broke my heart." "I'm sorry, Duxton." "The last thing I want to do is to hurt anybody." "Roger!" "What happened?" "Car accident." "He wants to kill you." "He's brain damaged." "Well, that's because you ran over him." "Well, who are you going to believe" "Me or this goose?" "Well, bunny rabbit?" "Ooh!" "I said no more animal references!" "Aah!" "Egg?" "Uh-Uh." "Mind if I have one?" "Sure." "I think I backed the wrong horse." "Looks like we outsmarted him." "Maybe you need help." "Right." "I'll call the cops." "Thank you for calling the police response squad." "You'll be placed in a queue" "To be answered by the first available operator." "Please hold." "Roger, are you ok?" "No." "I think I'm addicted to eggs." "Eggs aren't addictive." "Man, it's a pigsty in here." "Stay back." "Or you'll beat me?" "Ohh!" "Ohh!" "Hello." "Police quick response." "Um, yes, hello." "Excuse me" "Ohh!" "You're in a lot of trouble, buster." "For what?" "Nowhere on these egg cartons does it say," ""Health warning- These eggs can kill you. "" "He's been putting tobacco in the chicken feed." "Management can always learn something from the worker," "Eh, Roger?" "I should've killed you first, then crushed you." "Simple mistake." "Won't happen again." "Look at this." "Ever heard of defrost?" "Ahem." "Ohh." "I don't know how people can live like this." "Ok, the place is a little untidy," "But that's nothing compared to getting innocent people" "Hooked on nicotine." "Ratbag lefty, greeny, do-Gooder." "Outside that window, the world's disintegrating," "And what's your solution?" "Kick the tobacco industry around." "Easy target, ain't we?" "I hate you turning defenseless little chickens" "Into tobacco junkies!" "You're fools if you think you can beat us." "We'll just keep coming back in a different form." "Eggs today, milk tomorrow." "Then what?" "Baby food?" "We're working on it." "You're one sick puppy!" "And you're butt-Dead." "Get in." "Both of you." "Got a cigarette?" "I'm sorry, Roger," "But I'm not spending the final moments of my life" "Locked in a refrigerator" "Breathing someone else's smoke." "Please." "I'm falling to pieces." "I got to have one last puff." "I can dig that." "It's a confined space in here." "Chill, baby." "It's not the cigarette" "That's going to kill you." "Ha." "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Nã­" "Roger!" "Aah!" "Yeow!" "Aah!" "Roger!" "Roger!" "Aah!" "Oh!" "Bye-Bye, bunny!" "Aah!" "Huh?" "Don't mess with a psychopath." "Aah!" "Ohh!" "Ohh!" "You killed my fish!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Ick." "The ambulance boys have got a mother of a mess" "To clean up down there." "I've been meaning to fix that ironing board, officer." "Lyndon." "Roger." "Ok." "Scram, you little runt." "She sure loves you." "Well, yeah, I'm a real dog person." "She's so pretty." "She was part of a music box." "I know." "I used to have one." "Why did you take it to pieces?" "That's what I do." "Do you ever put things back together?" "No." "Bye, Roger." "You can't go." "You've still got to prove we're not alone" "In the universe." "As if." "How could I be anything but a chicken worker?" "We are what we are," "And that's that." "Oh, well." "If you're ever passing through bucket," "I make a great omelet." "Sunday!" "Excuse me, lady." "It's for you." "Hurry up, lady." "Coming." "I have to go." "Better take it before I drop it." "You did this for me?" "You made me realize that..." "Parts are like people." "They belong together." "You on or off?" "Thanks." "Well, that's all I wanted to say." "Would you like to have dinner?" "I mean, if you're hungry." "â™ª moon river â™ª" "Are you hungry?" "I'm starving." "â™ª wider than a mile â™ª â™ª I'm crossing you in style â™ª â™ª some day â™ª â™ª old dream maker â™ª â™ª you heartbreaker â™ª" "â™ª wherever you're goin' â™ª â™ª I'm goin' your way â™ª" "â™ª 2 drifters â™ª â™ª off to see the world â™ª â™ª there's such a lot of world â™ª â™ª to see â™ª â™ª we're after â™ª" "â™ª the same â™ª â™ª rainbow's end â™ª â™ª waitin' round the bend â™ª â™ª my huckleberry friend â™ª â™ª moon river â™ª" "â™ª and me â™ª" "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "Action." "Barry, get out." "Camera." "Action." "Action." "Ee-Yaah!" "Too close." "Yeah." "Oh!" "â™ª you'll always be welcome â™ª â™ª here in my home â™ª â™ª welcome â™ª" "Aah!" "â™ª welcome â™ª" "Aah!" "â™ª even if you go away â™ª â™ª welcome â™ª â™ª yeah, my place is always open â™ª â™ª yes, you're always welcome â™ª" "â™ª yeah, yeah, yeah â™ª" "Ooh!" "â™ª whatever I can do â™ª â™ª I'll do it for you â™ª â™ª you will be welcome â™ª â™ª we know where you're from â™ª" "Aah!" "â™ª welcome â™ª" "â™ª my door is always open â™ª" "Aah!" "Barry!" "My dog." "â™ª wherever you roam â™ª â™ª yeah, yeah, yeah â™ª â™ª you always got a home â™ª â™ª my door is always open â™ª" "â™ª welcome â™ª" "â™ª welcome â™ª â™ª it's good to see the sun â™ª â™ª welcome â™ª â™ª yeah, my door is always open â™ª" "â™ª you're always welcome â™ª" "â™ª I just want you to know â™ª â™ª even if you go â™ª â™ª you'll always be welcome â™ª" "â™ª whatever I should do â™ª â™ª if I do it for you â™ª â™ª you will be welcome â™ª â™ª here in my home â™ª" "â™ª welcome â™ª"