"They won't." "She won't stop, you know?" "Day after..." "I was a maker." "I hope they do it tonight..." "When she's sleeping." "But I'm scared..." "She said that I gotta make a meat loaf." "I said we'd bring jell-o salad, but Kitty said meat loaf." "So..." "Hon." "So what's that, hon?" "I said it's Gordo's birthday tonight." "We're supposed to be at your brother's at 4:00, with meat loaf." "Sounds, uh, different today... don't ya think?" "Like, angry?" "I'm washing towels." "It's a towel sound." "Huh." "Kitty said they just got one of those fancy European all-in-ones." "Says it washes and dries." "One machine." "Can you believe that?" "Bet that set them back a penny." "He can afford it, your brother." "Kitty said he just got a big promotion after only working there a year." "Kitty said they also got one of those fancy new surround sound systems." "Guess I married the wrong Nygaard." "Oh!" "Heh heh heh." "That's what I said." "We had a good laugh." "Well, it's just slow now at the shop." "Oh, hon." "That's what ya always say..." ""slow."" "Well... better get back to it." "You make your own wins." "That's what Kitty said Chaz told her." "Salesmen make their own wins." "You gotta try harder, hon." "Smile, for Pete's sake." "Maybe wear a nicer tie." "You gave me this tie." "Well, if you were a better salesman," "I'd have bought you a nicer tie." "At least take a look." "I keep thinking maybe it's the settings." "Kitty says Chaz fixes things around the house all the time." "Says he took the toaster apart over the weekend." "Now it's good as new." "Browns to beat the band." "So that's, uh... like I said, there's two kinds of policies you should be thinking about." "You got your whole life and... your whole life plus, which covers the same benefits of whole life plus... a heck of a lot more." "Well, we just came in to get Charline on my health care." "On account of I'm having a baby." "Yeah." "A boy, we're hoping." "Or a little girl." "I'd just about hug the pants off a little girl." "Oh, yeah?" "Well, uh..." "Even more... all... all the more reason to, uh... because what happens... what happens if you have an accident at your job?" " I work at the library." " Okay." "What happens if you have a car crash and go out the windshield?" "O... or say you're up a ladder, cleaning out the gutters, and you fall off the darn thing and break your neck?" "These things happen every day." "And people fall asleep smoking in bed." "They burn to death." "What I'm saying is the morgue is... is full of guys thought they didn't need life insurance." "For... for peace of mind, I'm saying, to know that your little boy... or girl." "Right." "Or little girl is taken care of." "We're supposed to be at my mom's by 4:00." "Yeah." "So we're gonna..." "Oh!" "O... okay." "Well, at least let me give you a brochure." "Or... or I got these pens." "I got these nif-nifty pens." "Look at that, huh?" "With most of the colors..." "Okay, well, if you change your mind then, uh, give me a..." "Aw, heck." "Will ya look at that?" " What is it, dad?" " Yeah, dad." " What is it?" " Oh, h... hey, Sam." "That, there, boys... is a black man." "He don't look black, dad." "Yeah, dad, he don't look black." " More like a big pumpkin." " Ha ha." "Yeah!" "Yeah, like a big, stupid pumpkin." "Lester..." "Niggered." "Now, come on, Sam, it... it's Nygaard, just like in high school." "You went to high school with a black man, dad?" " Yeah, dad, did you?" " Shut up." "How you been, Lester?" " Oh, yeah, real good." " Yeah?" "Yeah." "Me too." "Yeah, trucking company's doing super." "Got rigs all over the Great Lakes." "Just bought a summer house up Bear sland." "It's pretty sweet." "Hey, you remember the story I told you of the boy I put in the oil drum and rolled onto the highway?" " Is that him, dad?" " Yeah, dad, is that him?" "Oh, you betcha." "Betcha." "Good old Lester pencil dick." " Oh..." "Ahem." " Hey, say, Lester, what was the name of that girl you went with in high school?" "You know, uh... the curvy one." " It's Pearl, yeah." " Yeah." "Pearl... what a rack on that girl, huh?" "Dad's saying she had big titties." "Yeah, I know what "rack" means, you fairy..." " Ow." " Yeah, dad, ow!" "You know, she gave me a tug once." "Homecoming senior year, with the nice, fat hands." "Real soft." "We're married now." "Going on 18 years." "Oh, dad, that's embarrassing." "Yeah, dad, super embarrassing." "18 years, huh?" "Yeah." "That's something." "Never knew what she saw in you, really." "Oh, well, I..." "No, I mean... help me out." "Is it your stupid pencil dick or your little rat face?" "Yeah, well, uh..." "I should get back to it." "Oh, come on." "Did I ever tell ya how I used to beat this little guy up in high school?" "And write my name on my fist in sharpie 'fore I'd punch him, so everyone else would know who did it." " That's a good one, dad." " Yeah, dad, real good one." "Remember?" "Yeah, I... it's a long time ago, but..." "Oh, what a day." "Excuse me..." "Miss?" "Do you think, uh... will it be much longer?" "This thing hurts like the dickens." " We'll call your name." " Yeah, but I've been here" " an hour already." " We'll call your name." " Could I have a sip?" " Hmm?" "Oh." "Heck, take the whole can." "Can't drink the darn thing without a straw." "Ahh." "Whew." "ICU resident on call, please contact..." "Obliged." "Mm." "What happened to your nose?" "Oh, it was, uh..." "It was just a... misunderstanding." "Now, was this you misunderstanding the other fella, or him misunderstanding you?" "Pardon?" "Who misunderstood whom?" "Oh, no, what I'm saying..." "It's, uh... it's not good to dwell on these things." "Why?" "Pardon?" "Why is it not good to dwell on these things?" "Especially things that put you in the hospital." "Uh..." "Well, I was... ahem..." "I was outnumbered, if you wanna know the truth." "Three to one." "I mean, big... big guys too... well, one of them." "Other two were just kids, but big for their age, you know?" "If I was any kind of man," "I'd have shown that Sam what's what." "Sam?" "Hess." "The bully in high school, and he's a bully now." "So why didn't ya?" "Show him what's what?" "Well, his... he had his sons with him and..." "You let a man beat you in front of his children" " to send them a message?" " No, that's not..." "Heck." "Just... heck." "In my experience, if you let a man break your nose, the next time, he tries to break your spine." "Sam... no way." "Mm-mm." "I mean, I don't think..." "It just, uh..." "I guess I, uh, embarrassed him in front of his boys." " You embarrassed him?" " Yeah." "By, uh..." "He was telling me about a time where he and my wife, they were, uh... hmm." "But he didn't know she was my wife is the thing, and when I told him..." " wha..." " This man has slept with your wife, and you're worried about embarrassing him." "Uh-uh." "Not slept." "No, they didn't, uh..." "He said it was just... she has soft hands, see, and, uh, I guess..." "No, mister, we're not friends." "I mean, maybe we will be someday." "But I gotta say, if that were me in your position..." "I would have killed that man." "Well, now..." "Come on." "You said he bullied you in high school, right?" "Four years." "Gave me an ulcer." "You know what, one time, he put me in an oil barrel and rolled me in the road." "Seriously?" "And now he tells you that... he had relations with your wife." "He bullies you again in front of his children." "This is a man who doesn't deserve to draw breath." "Yeah, okay, but, uh..." " Here's the thing." " No." "That is the thing." "Well, heck!" "I mean, o... okay." "Okay." "But..." "What am I supposed to do?" "Heck, you're so sure about it, maybe you should just kill him for me." "You're asking me to kill this man." "No, that was..." "I was joking." "Mr. Nygaard?" "Uh, y... yeah, that's me." "Ju... o... one second." "We... we... we... we're just two fellas talking, right?" "We're just... blowing off steam." " Sir, it's real busy." " Like I said, one second." "Sam Hess." "No, just... just one second." "That is not..." "Sir!" "Just one word." "Yes or no." "Sir, I'm going to give your spot..." "Yeah!" "Aah!" "Yeah, I'm coming, for..." "Pete's sake." "Cold enough for ya, Chief?" "Supposed to get down to -10 later." "Yeah." "Heard that." "Don't much like the sound of negative." "Thought I'd strip down to my shorts, work on my tan." "So what's this here then?" "Chief, I arrived on the scene at 1300 hours." "Found this '93 New Yorker." "Looks like she fled the road and crashed the fence." "I found a set of footprints leading away from the car." "Thought possibly our driver injured, you know, got confused, wandered into the woods." "I was just about to investigate." "There's blood here." "Hair too." "Yeah." "Saw that." "I was thinking maybe a deer, but, uh, couldn't find the evidence, so..." "Here it is." "Son of a gun." "Blood on the steering wheel." "Driver could have hit his head." "Or her head." "You check the trunk?" "No, sir." "Huh." "So you wanna take a look at those footprints then?" "Sounds good." "How's Ida?" "Any day now." "You got a name picked out?" "Can't get that woman to decide what color to paint the nursery." "Can't believe I missed that deer in the trunk." "Don't take it hard." "Been doing this a long time." "Never checked for a deer in the trunk." "Or any wildlife." "Chief." "Hi, hon." "In the kitchen." "Something smells good." "Your boy wanted a hamburger." "Sounds like my boy." "Molly found a wreck out on 71." "How's she doing?" " Molly?" " Mm." " Yeah, good." " I always liked her." "Yeah, she's a peach." "Anyhoo, looks like the driver tried to head out on foot." "He got lost and froze to death in the woods." " Oh, my." " Yah." "Funny thing is, the fellow was just wearing underpants." " That so?" " Yah." " No I.D., nothing." " Hmm." "Couldn't find his clothes anywhere." "Maybe he ate 'em." "Hmm." "I was thinking maybe blue." " For the nursery." " Oh, yeah?" "Mm." "Earlier I was thinking maybe blue." " Then I changed my mind." " Blue's nice." "Maybe green." "Well, I'm ready to get painting." "Soon as you decide." "You're a good man, Vern Thurman." "My sister was crazy telling me not to marry you." "Your sister is crazy." "Mm." "Ha ha." "Dad said we could take turns." "Yeah?" "Dad said that he also thinks you've got a potato brain, so..." "Hey..." "Shut up!" "You're doing it wrong." "You need to press your forearm into the back of his neck, grab your elbow with the other hand to choke him right out." "W... what you want, mister?" "Yeah, mister." "What do you want?" "Sign outside says Hess  Sons." " Which one's the older boy?" " Me." "I'm Mickey." "You know, so... that leaves me in charge when dad is gone." "Are not!" "Mom said..." "Mom has nothing to do with it, sister!" "Hey!" "Help you with something?" "Sam Hess?" "Who wants to know?" "Me." "Only two reasons to come to my shop, friend." "Either you need a truck or you drive a truck, huh?" "You a truck driver?" "I was just talking to your boys." "I think the younger one's a little dim." "What did you say?" "His IQ seems low, I'm saying." "Have you had him tested?" "Hit him, dad!" "Yeah, dad, hit him!" "I'm gonna restrain myself... you know, on account of you got an obvious head injury, and not beat you to death with a tire iron." "But I'm gonna ask you again... what the heck do you want?" "I just wanted to have a look at ya." "Okay." "That'll do it." "How does a grown man fall over his own feet?" "It was ice." "I slipped on ice." " We should have canceled." " Oh, don't be a baby." "Hi!" "Hey, we're here." " We're here." " Hi!" "Come on in." "Chaz is working the ham." "Oh." "Took the whole team down to Duluth Tuesday." "Big spread at the marriott." "Oh, I always wanted to stay there." "Yeah, it's real sweet... king-size bed, view of the lake... you name it." " Boss took me out for dinner." " Just the two of 'em." "Steak big as a catcher's mitt." "Said, "Chaz, you're going places in this world."" "Gave him a raise and a corner office." "Yeah." "Hear that, Lester?" "A corner office." " Yeah." "Real good." " And him, your younger brother." " Yeah, I said I heard." " Vice president, sales." "Midwest region." "Bought the surround sound to celebrate." "I mean, it's pretty sweet, huh?" "You're gonna have to marry that ham, you get any more familiar with it." "Saw it on Rachael Ray." "She said that massaging breaks the muscle down, makes the meat juicier." "Lester never wants to try new things." "Now, hold on." "That's not true." "We make Gordo try stuff all the time." "Chaz says we have to open his horizons." "Broaden his horizons." "It's a big world, you know." "There is more to life than just Minnesota." "Took a real tumble, huh?" "There's a... a spot over by the fire station... it's always icy." "Don't know what the heck I was thinking." "Lester." "Ohh!" "Come out to the garage." "Help me get some more beer." "Took Gordo to a specialist last month." "Think he might have the autism." "Hmm?" "Won't stop drawing on the walls, and Kitty... she said she found a mason jar in his closet." "I guess that he pees in it at night." "Huh." "What's that about?" "Hey, wanna see something cool?" "Sure." "Sweet!" "Yeah, not those." " Aw, jee... what is that?" " That there... is your m249 S.A.W. light machine gun, sometimes referred to as "the piglet."" "Are you allow... c..." "can you even have that?" "Is it legal?" "Technically, no way." "But I got a buddy works supply over at Camp Ripley, and, heck, I'm an American." "I pay my taxes." "You wanna take a look?" "It's gas-operated, air-cooled." "Shoots 725 rounds per minute." "Oh!" "Oh." "Oh, jeez." "You should've told me it was so heavy." " Is it okay?" " No, Lester!" "It's not okay!" "You..." "Here..." "You broke the darn..." "Why are you such a G-D screw-up?" "Hey, now." "Ever since you were..." "And now Kitty... she said she talked to Pearl last week, and she's had it... your wife." "Said you been acting plain weird... just moping around." "Said she caught you standing in the bathroom with your toothbrush in your hand just looking in the mirror." "Said foam was coming out of your mouth like a rabid dog." "Oh, come on!" "That's... not..." "How I may or may not be feeling." "And for your information," "I hadn't had a lot of sleep the night before, so... so the toothpaste, that was just nothing!" "Did you really trip on the ice and break your nose?" "Yeah." "Yes." "I..." "I told you, outside the fire station." "You know they run the hoses and wash the trucks, and it gets all slippery and wet." "Ohh, you know guys at work... they talk about how they look up to their brothers." "Their older brothers." "Sometimes I tell people you're dead." "I mean, heck, Lester, you're 40 years old." "When are you gonna get your act together?" "Your own brother?" "You didn't have to hit him." "I mean, seriously, what is the matter with you?" "Your own brother!" "Yes, one more." "Yes, one more time." "Before the 17th." "Do you need this to look like an accident?" "Figure it out and call me back." " Realty." " It's me." "St. Paul." "Your call was expected yesterday." "I got delayed." "Problems?" "Car troubles." "Fixed now." "But you finished the assignment." "Of course." "And when can they expect you in Duluth?" "The new client is anxious to begin." "Soon." "I took a detour." "And the nature of this... detour?" "It's personal." "Shouldn't be more than a day or two." "I'll let Duluth know." "All right." "Okay." "Yah." "Oh, yah, big fella." "Uhh!" "Oh, yah." "Yah." "Oh." "That's good." "Oh!" "Uh..." "Aah!" "Yeah?" "No." "Yep?" "Aw, jeez, where?" "Okay." "Pick me up, huh?" " Gotta go?" " Mm." "Homicide." "Molly's coming to get me." "Go back to sleep, hon." " Love you." " Love you too." " Thanks." " Ida sleeping?" "Yep." "What you want me to write for "cause of death"?" "Put "self-explanatory."" "You okay there, Bill?" "Oh, yeah." "Threw up a bit ago." " Not in here, I hope." " Oh, no." "Went out to the parking lot." "Wife made spaghetti for dinner." "Seemed a shame to barf it up." "I'm okay now, so long as I don't look." "Aw, heck." "That's Sam Hess." "Hess that owns the trucking company?" "Yeah, with the two boys both dumb as a dog's foot." "Hold on." "Isn't Hess tied to that syndicate of fellas out of Fargo?" "Gunrunners and such?" "So they say." "Never seen the proof." "Well, jeez, you..." "I mean, you think this could be, like, an organized crime thing?" "You know, a hit or the like." "I don't know what I think yet, except I was warm in bed half an hour ago." "How many times I gotta tell ya?" "You can't just take the sheets off of one bed and stick 'em on another." "It's "unsanitory."" "I shake 'em out first." "You don't have the sense God gave a clam, do ya?" "Go shovel the walk." " I need a room." " Just you?" " Pardon?" " Is it just for you, the room?" "What difference does that make?" "It's a different rate for two." "And if you got pets... dog, cat... it's an extra 10 bucks." "What if I got a fish?" "'Scuse me?" "Would a fish cost me $10?" "Or what if I kept spiders or mice?" "What if I had bacteria?" "Sir, bacteria are not pets." " Could be." " Sir, perhaps you'd be happier in a different motel?" "I just wanna know the policy." "You see, I'm a student of institutions." "Sir, do you have a pet or not?" "Oh, no." "It's just me." "Why do you let her talk to you like that?" "Aw, she's not that bad." "Son, she compared you to a clam." "Well, what should I do?" "A guy insulted me once." "I pissed in his gas tank." "Car never drove straight again." "Leroy's Motor Inn." "Oh, yes, ma'am, I'm looking out my window, and there's a young fellow urinating in the gas tank of a red Cavalier." "Son of a..." "Hey!" "Hey!" "You little..." " Warm ya up, hon?" " Yeah, thanks, dad." "Whatcha looking at?" "Murder file." " Oh, yeah?" " Yeah." "Sam Hess got himself killed last night over at the Lucky Penny." "You don't say." "Knife in the head." "You didn't hear that from me." "Hey, there, Molly, Lou." " Coffee?" " Sure." " Eggs over medium?" " Won't say no." " How's the leg?" " Eh." "Goes from my ass to the ground just like the other." "Thinking of doing some ice fishing this weekend." "Sorry to hear it." " Interested?" " No, sir." "The only thing I ever caught fishing in winter was a cold." "Say, Chief, listen, I been thinking about that fella in the snow with the underpants?" "Something odd about that." "You're saying other than the fact" " that he was just wearing panties?" " Yeah." "See, we know from the wreck that whoever was driving cracked their head on the steering wheel, right?" " But the fella in the snow..." " No head injury." " Yeah." "So you see..." " That's some good" " police work there, Deputy." " Oh, thanks." "But if he's not the driver, I guess we gotta ask..." "Who is he?" "Ran his prints." "Nothing." "Plus, turns out the car was stolen." " Oh, yeah?" " Yeah, yeah, over in Grand Forks." "I called the local pd." "I'm just waiting on a callback." "Any thoughts there on Hess?" "Uh, no, not as such." "The, um..." "lady that Hess was with?" "Didn't get a good look at the fella killed him on account of all the blood in her eyes, but, um, you know, we're checking the knife for prints." "Oh, also, Bill's going around to local stores, see if maybe the knife was bought here in Bemidji." "You'll make a good chief one day." "Me?" "What about Bill?" "He's got seniority." "Bill cleans his gun with bubble bath." "No, it'll be you." "If you want." "When you talk to the police, just keep it simple." ""Thanks, but no thanks," in other words." "I've already talked to Fargo, and they want to deal with this themselves." "They're sending guys." "Deal with what?" "He was in a whorehouse." "Glad he's dead." "Ma, don't talk like that." "Yeah, ma, don't talk like that." "Makes me live in the North Pole, and then he's got the nerve to..." "I'm not kidding." "I'm gonna sing at his funeral." "* La la la la la-la-la-la-la-la *" "Mr. Mickey, you have a phone call." "She said me, you doofus." " Can I come?" " No!" "Jeez!" "Just stay here with ma." " Hello?" " Mickey?" "Lewis Grossman." "Your dad's estate attorney." "First of all," "I'd like to say how sorry I am for your loss." "Okay." "Next thing is" "I'm responsible for overseeing the dispersal of your dad's vast estate." " You mean the money?" " Right." "Money, real estate, holdings, automobiles and, uh..." "Well, there's no delicate way to put this." "The will was very clear." "Your dad decided to give everything to your younger brother Moe." " Are you kidding?" " I know it's hard to hear." "But the will was very specific." ""I leave the entirety of my vast estate to my second-born and favorite son Moe."" "That's sweet." "He must have really loved that boy." "Anyway, that's it." "Once again, I'm sorry for your loss." "If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to call me." "Well, like I said, Mrs. Hess, we're checking some things on our end, but if there's anything you could tell us" " about your husband's business..." " Appreciate the visit, Chief, but Mrs. Hess had no kind of involvement with Sam's business." "Frankly, she's mystified, her husband being a pillar of the community and all." "I mean, heck, voted Bemidji businessman of the year, 1996 and '98." "Who was it?" " Yah." " Like I said, it's a puzzler." "Course, we both know some of your boys have had run-ins with the law in the past... stolen merchandise charges and the like." "And, you know, the staties had that case as to maybe your outfit's got ties to that crime syndicate" " out of Fargo." " Whoa, wh..." "You're gonna stand here..." "let me get this straight." "You're gonna stand here and call the victim a criminal in front of his wife, his kids?" "Well, no, no one's calling anyone a criminal." "Just trying to figure out what happened." "Chief!" "217!" "217!" "Uhh!" "Ugh!" "Don't need me to tell you it was a cold one out there." "And as of right now, nothing much has changed." "So let's take a look at where we are..." "What the heck..." "We got 5 degrees in Duluth..." " Hey, Lester." " Oh, hiya, Bo." "Jeez, what happened to your face there?" "You know that spot near the fire station?" " Where they wash the trucks?" " Yep." "Slipped on the ice." "Oofta." "Say, Lester, I need you to pull the file on Sam Hess." "On... who now?" "Sam Hess, you know, owns the truck depot over on winslow." "You know, big fella?" "Yeah, well, he's dead." " Oh, yeah?" " Yeah, shame." "It's a big policy." "Murder, they're saying." "Stabbed to death is what I heard." "You okay there, Lester?" "Sure." "Uh..." "Sure." "Y... you know I went to high school with him?" "You don't say." "Well, anyway," "I need you to pull the policy on that." "I have to get on the phone with his wife later." "Uh..." "Did you..." "Jeez." "Did you really kill him?" "Sam?" "Oh, my God." "Is Sam dead?" "How do you feel about that?" "Well, I mean... of course, it's, you know, a tragedy." "Well, why'd you kill him then?" "Now hold on a second!" "I never..." "Well, actually, you did." "Remember, yes or no?" " I never said yes." " Didn't say no." "No." "That won't... come on." "That won't... in a court of law..." "Who said anything about a court of law?" "I just mea..." "I... jeez." "And he had a wife, you know, and those boys." "Lester, he put you in a barrel and rolled you in the road." "Your problem is you spent your whole life thinking there are rules." "There aren't." "We used to be gorillas." "All we had is what we could take and defend." "The truth is, you're more of a man today than you were yesterday." "How do you figure?" "It's a red tide, Lester, this life of ours." "The shit they make us eat... day after day, the boss, the wife, et cetera, wearing us down." "If you don't stand up to it, let 'em know you're still an ape deep down where it counts, you're just gonna get washed away." "Phone call, Chief." "It's the wife." " Hey, hon." " White." " White what?" " I decided we're gonna paint the nursery white." " It's already white." " Well..." "I wanna paint it again." "The baby's room should have a new coat, don't you think?" "I do." "Any particular shade?" " What do you mean?" " Well, you got your bright white, your snow white..." "Eggshell." "Right." "There's eggshell." "Oh." "I hadn't thought of that." "I tell you what... why don't I stop by the hardware and pick up some different shades, and we'll figure it out tonight?" "We're having a baby, Vern." "That's true." "No." "I mean it's finally sinking in." "We're gonna have a baby." "I can't wait." "I'll see you soon." "Is there anything else you need there?" "Nope." "I'm good." "Come in, Chief." "This is Vern." "Go ahead." "Chief, I'm over at the hospital." "I was checking on the Hess boy, and, uh..." " How is he?" " Oh, you know, broken collar bone, got his bell rung pretty good." " That's a shame." " Yeah." "Hey, so I got to talking to Sue Roundtree, and I asked her if they had any head injuries lately... you know, my theory about the driver and the wreck... and she says they did, yesterday." "Real peculiar fella, she says." "Real intense." "And here's where it gets interesting." "'Cause she says the fella with the head injury was talking to another fella about Sam Hess." " Oh, yeah?" " Yes, sir." "Says the two was thick as thieves." "So suddenly I'm thinking, maybe these two cases, maybe they're connected, huh?" "Could be." "She say who the other fellow was?" "Uh, Lester Nygaard." "Really?" " Oh, you know him?" " Sure, I know Lester." "Sells insurance over at Bo's shop." "Yeah." "Yeah, I called over, and they're closed, so I was gonna go by Lester's place." "No, I know Lester." "I'll do it." "You call it a day." "Good work." " Lester?" " In the basement." "Whatcha doing, hon?" "I'm, uh, trying to fix the darn thing." "It looks like the motor mount broke." "You sure you know what you're doing?" "Seems pretty straightforward." "So wanna give her a try?" "There's nothing in it." "For... for a test, I'm saying." "Turn it off." "Turn it off!" "You killed it." " You killed my washing machine." " No, I was... it was the... the tide, you know?" "I..." "I was, um, standing up to the..." "I was..." "I was being a man." "But you're not a man, Lester." "You're not even half a man." "Honestly, I don't know what got into me marrying you." "My mom said, "don't do it, Pearl."" "She said, "he's the kind of boy that loses all the time."" ""And you know what those boys grow up to be, don't ya?" "Losers."" "Take that back." "Or what?" "What are you gonna do?" "You can't even face me when we're having sex." "Now, hold on!" "That is you not facing me!" "That's so I can picture a real man." "Oh!" "Hmm." "You take that back." "Or what?" "What are you gonna do?" "Oh!" "You gonna hit me?" "That's a lau..." "Oh." "Aw, jeez." "Aw, jeez." "Oh, jeez." "Oh, God, I'm sorry." "Oh, God." "Oh, God." "Uh, yeah, it's me." "You gotta help me out." "I've done something bad." "Leroy's Motor Inn." "Oh!" "Hi." "Can I have room 23, please?" " Yeah?" " Yeah." "Yeah, it... it's me." "It's Lester." "Uh... she's, uh... my wi... my wife, she's, uh..." "Oh, hell." "Um..." "Look, I think I, uh..." "she's in the basement dead, and, uh, look, I'm freaking out here." "I don't know what to do." "Lester, have you been a bad boy?" "Ha... jeez." "Yeah." "The hammer and, uh..." "look... can you come over?" "I'm on Willow Creek Drive." "Number 613." "Please!" "Please?" "Sure, Lester." "I'll be right there." "Thank you!" "Thank you." "Here we go." "What did you do?" "You killed her!" "What did you do?" "You killed her." "You killed her!" "Hey, there, Lester." "It'll get down to -10 tonight I hear." " Is Pearl home?" " Uh, no, no." "She's at my brother's." "Okay, then." "How's the nose?" "Ah, this, uh..." "It hurts." "How'd it happen anyway?" "Slipped." "Over by the fire station." "Ouch." "You go to the hospital?" "Yeah." "They set it." "You talk to anyone while you were there?" "Uh..." "What do you mean?" "Well, the reason I'm here..." "I'm not sure you heard." "Sam Hess got killed last night at the Lucky Penny." " Oh..." "Yeah." " Nasty business." "And, well, I heard you were talking to another fella about Hess before he died." "Over at the hospital." "No." "I don't think so." "What was his name again?" "The other fella?" "Ha ha!" "You okay, Lester?" "You seem a bit... seem a bit jumpy." "Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's just, you know, um..." "Pearl is gonna be home soon, and, um..." "Lester, listen to me very carefully." "I need you to get down on the ground." "Now, wait... wait just a second." " Lester, on the ground." " This is not what it looks like." "Now, hold on." "Hold on." "Don't... don't... don't go down there." "Don't... there's nothing down... that's not..." "I didn't do nothing." "I didn't..." "I just got home." "I just got home and... there's nothing down th... that's not..." "I didn't do nothing." "I didn't do nothing!" "I didn't do nothing!" "I just came home." "I just came home." "This is Chief Thurman." "I'm at 613 Willow Creek Drive." "Requesting backup, 613 Willow Creek..." "Chief." "Chief?" "Chief?" "Any more?" "Lester, are there any more cops?" "What did you tell him?" "Nothing." "He asked about Sam." "You got any more shells for this thing?" "No." "Is that the basement?" "Mm." "Ow, ow." "Ow." "The police are here." "I said the police are here!" "What do we d... do..." "Officer down." "613 Willow Creek Ddrive." "Roger that." "Confirming code 3." "Bemidji police!" "All units, officer in need of immediate assistance at 613 Willow Creek Drive." "Bemidji police!" "If there's someone in the house, come out with your hands up." "Okay." " Molly!" " Oh, God." "Down here!" "Husband's alive." "Oh." "Aw, jeez!" "Dad." "Come in, dad." "Over." "Yeah, dad here." "Come back." "My team's up by 13." "Over." "What happened?" "Over." "Kicked in another field goal." "Over." "Sweet." "You brush your teeth?" "Over." "Yeah." "Over." "Homework?" "Over." "Uh, did my math and science." "I still have to do English." "Over." "Okay, well, as soon as the game's over." "Over." "Evening, Officer." "Evening." "License and registration, please." "We could do it that way." "You ask me for my papers." "I tell you it's not my car, that I borrowed it... see where things go from there." "We could do that." "Or you could go get in your car and drive away." "Now, why would I do that?" "Because some roads you shouldn't go down." "Because maps used to say, "there be dragons here."" "Now they don't." "But that don't mean the dragons aren't there." "Dad." "Come in, dad." "Over." "You step out of the car, please, sir." "How old's your kid?" "I said step out of the car." "Dad, come in." "Dad, over." "Let me tell you what's gonna happen..." "Officer Grimly." "I'm going to roll my window up, then I'm going to drive away, and you're gonna go home to your daughter, and every few years, you're gonna look at her face and know that you're alive because you chose" "not to go down a certain road on a certain night, that you chose to walk into the light instead of into the darkness." "Do you understand me?" "Sir..." "I'm rolling up my window." "Dad." "Come in, dad." "Over." "Dad?" "Are you there?" "Over." "So I got two kinds of sandwiches... tuna and turkey." "Tuna's for the fish." "Unless you think they'd think that's cannibalism." "You know..." "I been looking for more help in the restaurant." "You know, someone to seat customers and answer the phone." " A hostess." " That what they call it?" "Yah." "Huh." "Anyway... not sure if that's something you might be interested in." "I'm a police officer, dad." "Well, sure, I know that." "I also know that people in this world are less inclined to shoot a hostess than, say, an officer of the law." "That's true." "So..." "That mean you're gonna help your old man out?" "Nope." "But maybe you could put that in the ad." "Listen, on second thought," "I think I'm gonna head into work." "Rain check on the fishing?" "Sounds good." "Love you, dad." "Love you too, hon."