"Come on, boys!" "That was pathetic!" "I wanna see sweat!" "Hey, you playin'?" "Timothy needs a ball!" "He needs my balls!" "You wish." " Ready, boys?" " Ready, sir!" "Ready, fancy feet?" "Excellent, men!" "Showers!" "Hey, you're gonna be late for that Shakes-queer crap." "Who cares!" "That crap's like 400 years old." "It doesn't make sense." "It does to anyone with a brain." "A brain, but no dick!" "All I know is rugby!" "Rugby rocks!" "Give it up!" "Good try." "We're so proud of you, Timmy!" "My name's Timothy." "My name's Timothy, too!" " Need some ice?" " I can handle it." "Nice eye shadow." "Gentlemen!" "You will not disrespect a soul in here." "Today, I challenge you to write in verse." "Remembering William Shakespeare, scribe away your thoughts and feelings boldly on a page." ""What angel wakes me from my flow'ry bed?"" ""What angel wakes me from my flow'ry bed?"" ""I pray thee gentle mortal, sing again."" ""I pray thee gentle mortal, sing again. "" ""Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind;"" ""Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind;"" ""And therefore is wing'd cupid painted blind."" ""And therefore is wing'd cupid painted blind. "" "# OH, TIMOTHY..." "TIMOTHY #" "# OH, TIMOTHY... #" "Timothy..." "Oh, Timothy." "A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM... the spring senior play." "Auditions are Friday." "I'm not an actor." "All the world's a stage." "Awaken and empower what's within." "I'd rather not." "Here he comes!" "Your boyfriend is... mmm!" "You like watching us out there?" "I love watching you play." "I bet you do." "Haaa!" "Someone's jumpy today." "What the hell happened to you?" "Ouch!" " Was it a golfball?" " Nope." "Right, no blood." "# POOR PATHETIC GAY FOOL, IN AN ALL-DUDE SCHOOL #" "# WHERE ARE THE POLICE OF STEREO TYPE?" "#" "# SAVE OUR BOY FROM ALL THIS OVERLY BELEAGUERED #" "# AND OBVIOUS HYPE #" " Was it a basketball?" " Not in season." "# OH I'M IN A TIZZY 'BOUT MY FRIEND TIMMY #" "# IT'S SUCH A PITY, MY FRIEND TIMMY #" "# POOR, POOR, POOR, POOR, POOR, POOR... #" "Baseball?" "# THE BALLS THEY JUST DON'T STOP COMIN'" "# TOO BAD THEY AIN'T THE BALLS HE'S WANTIN'" "# THE IRON Y IS JUST AS SAD #" "# AS THE POOR HORN DOG BEFORE MY EYES. #" "It was a dodgeball." "That's boring." "Where's the PE-free school?" "State law..." "Fags play one hour of sports a day and they get beat up." "Need a bodyguard?" "What you need to do is stand up and fight for yourself." "Since when did you start giving advice like that?" "Since I started my own personal revolution." "You gonna be in Ms. T's play?" "I don't have a choice." "Come on." " I heard she's a dyke." " Ms. Tebbit?" "Drinks soy milk." "I drink soy milk!" "Plays guitar... makes her own clothes, emancipated herself from her parents when she was 16." "I'm not a lesbian." "That's your fantasy!" "I'm hetero-flexible." "You know, why don't you two just get it on already!" "I've tried." "Have you?" "Hetero-flexible?" "I'm straight, but shit happens." "Let's go, lovebirds!" "# OH I'M IN A TIZZY 'BOUT MY FRIEND TIMMY #" "# IT'S SUCH A PITY, MY FRIEND TIMMY #" "Timmy?" "Timothy, sugar!" "I need your muscles a minute." "Thanks for the help, boys." "That's fine, honey." "I'll get it later." "You're home early." "No, I'm not." "What happened?" "It was an accident." "So was that." "Why do I work my ass off to put you in that goddamn school?" "You finally got a job?" "You're father was right." "I don't have a father!" "I should just lock you up in your room." "Do you know what I'm sacrificing?" "Tell him I did get a job." "It was just a dodgeball." "Honey!" "So what do you think of these?" "They're perfect, actually." "Harder!" " I look sexy." " You look really good." "Smile, bitch." "Just 'cause I'm wearin' this dress doesn't mean..." "Hey, girl!" "Hot fire!" "Hot fire!" "So what dead drag queen was it that you stole these boots from?" "It was my mom, actually." "Oh, your mom?" "She died?" "What?" "Night, sugar." "Don't screw this up." "Yes?" "Hi, I'm Donna." "Not interested." "What is it?" "I'm here for the training." "Oh..." "Donna." "Do come in." "It's quite atrocious out there." "I thought you were due to come on Thursday." "Oh, well, c'est la vie." "How are you this afternoon?" "Your spirits?" " I'm good." " Good" " No." "First lesson:" "You're never good;" "At Nora Fay, you're grand!" "Don't worry, darling." "It's only water." "Lu, lu, lu, lu, lu..." "I'm better without the piano." "I'll take your word." "This shit is thick." "Well, don't rub so hard, dear." "Here..." "Like that, you see..." "Gently." "There." "Now let's move on to lips." "Is that your normal shade?" "Let's see..." "With your coloring, I would say maybe..." "Lilac Delight." "Yes!" "Strong women wear lipstick." "Too strong." ""I see their knavery." "This is to make an ass of me." "To fright..."" "Is this a girl's part?" "You are dismissed." "Just so you know, I'm growing out a goatee." "Oh?" "Delightful!" "Time's up!" "We have ten minutes more." "What a team." "Your time is up!" "Your little warriors may enter in ten minutes." "Until then, the stage is ours." "That stage made for better storage." "Where were we?" "I was about to make a fool of myself." "My dear, do not limit yourself." "Nora Fay can take you to the edge of your imagination and beyond." "Is this you?" "Was." " You a singer?" " Was." "Was this your husband?" "Is." "Really?" "In front of Morgan Hill?" "Enough questions..." "My kid just started there." "Did yours go there?" "Oh, God, no!" "I bore no children." "I thank the Lord above for the grace he gave me just to spawn Nora Fay." "Come, dear." ""And the youth, mistook by me, Pleading for a lover's fee."" "I don't even know what I'm saying." "That will come." ""Shall we their fond pageant see?" "Lord, what fools these mortals be!"" "Agreed, indeed!" "Let's sing." "Sing?" "Now you." " I don't know it." " Follow me." "Lu, lu, lu..." "With the lyrics..." "A deep breath." "# WE FAIRIES, THAT DO RUN #" "# FROM THE PRESENCE OF THE SUN #" "# WE FOLLOW..." "DARKNESS #" "# LIKE A DREAM... #" "# LIKE A DREAM #" "Who's that?" "# WE FAIRIES, THAT DO RUN #" "# FROM THE PRESENCE OF THE SUN #" "# WE FOLLOW..." "DARKNESS #" "# LIKE A DREAM... #" "# LIKE A DREAM #" "# ALL BE AS THOU WAST WONT TO BE #" "# SEE AS THOU WAST WONT TO SEE #" "# BE AS THOU WAST WONT TO BE #" "# SEE AS THOU WAST WONT TO SEE... #" "Looks like I'm one of the lovers." "I'm not shaving." "At least you're not the jackass." "At least the jackass doesn't have to wear a dress!" "What is Thisby?" "Is that a chick?" "Congratulations, gentlemen." "Awaken and empower what's within!" "Nice pipes." "I heard your audition." "I saw the list." "Good afternoon." "It's going to be superb." "So many fascinating..." "I thought I told you my boys don't got time for those parts." "Must I remind you that Morgan Hill philosophy clearly states that academics transcends athletics?" "Larry'll side with me on this one." "I'll note you in my book of memory." "Puck!" "He's Puck in the play." " What play?" " The senior play." "He's the main fairy." " A fairy?" " It's a great part." "A fairy?" "!" "A kick-ass fairy." "You have lines to memorize." "We need a plan of attack." "This is great." "Sick, aren't they?" "Sick." ""I jest to Oberon and make him smile" "When I a fat and bean-fed horse beguile," "Neighing in likeness of a filly foal:" "And sometime lurk I in a gossip's bowl," "In very likeness of a roasted crab," "And when she drinks, against her lips I bob"" "This is for Helena." "Where's the rest of it?" "One of my personal favorites!" "Patience, Dr. Bellinger." "I've not forgotten about your frock." "These are for the Pyramus and Thisby finale, which I have reinvented as an incredibly hip song." "That's hot, Ms. T." "Shakespeare was meant for the masses." ""How now, spirit!" "Whither wander you?"" ""Either I mistake your shape and making quite," "Or else you are that shrewd and knavish sprite" "Call'd Robin Goodfellow:" "are you not he that frights the maidens of the villagery?"" ""Thou speak'st aright;" "I am that merry wanderer of the night."" "Now remember, my dear - there are no limitations." "You're early." "Oh... we could..." "Couldn't wait one moment more to show off my newest protege." "Nora Fay!" "I'm honored." "Did you bring the new lotions?" "Darling, we brought everything!" "Go ahead!" "She doesn't get it." "This year's varsity rugby team is one of the best in the history of our institution." "So, this has nothing to do with time requirements?" "We are concerned about the tradition - members of the rugby team portraying females?" "Truth be told!" "It's bad for morale." "You're embarrassing them!" "Only because you've trained them to cast judgement upon each other." "The Academy is concerned that we are sending the wrong message." "The Academy has been staging Shakespeare in this fashion for 56 years." "We live in a different time." "Your ignorance of the history of this Academy and the history of the theater is offensive." "Women were prohibited by law to act on the Elizabethan stage!" "Men filled the void." "If this confabulation is about your insecurities with sexuality or the sexuality of your warriors..." "I don't have issues with my sexuality!" "A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM is the senior play." "The cast is chosen." "Thank you, gentlemen." " Jock boy?" " I think he wants you." "I think he wants to kick my ass." "I think my star quality is rubbing off." "Why don't you rub up on Max a little bit?" "Maxie..." "It's never gonna happen." "Well, stop waiting for him." "# MAYBE THAT'S WHY MAX DON'T EVEN TRY #" "# TO RUB AND KISS AND SUCK MY THIGH #" "# OR GIVE ME THE TIME OF DAY #" "# 'CAUSE HE'S GAY, HE'S GAY, HE'S GAY!" "#" "He's not gay!" "Mom!" "Mom?" "!" "Hey, Ms. Tebbit needs a band for the play." "Really?" "Hey!" "Where we going?" "It's wet out here." "You'll catch cold." "You look beautiful." "Right." "Training was good?" "Apparently, I've got a lot of learning to do." "She said that?" "I know I could sell the shit if she'd just let me out the door with it." "I miss your daddy." " Dad's an asshole." " We were better off." "What?" " You didn't even try." " He kicked me out." "You left!" "You can have him." "I'm fine." "So, you'd rather live with Frankie again?" "She a better mother?" "You're my mother!" "Like it or not." "Why are you gay?" "What did I do?" "You didn't make me queer." "Don't use that word, Timothy!" "Nobody did." "I'm just queer." " So deal with it." " Go to hell!" "I do deal with it, Timothy." "Every day I deal with it." "You're not the only one who has it rough around here." "Every single day I come out of the closet just like you." "This is not just your problem." "It's both of ours and I'm trying!" "I'm open." "Over here!" "Good form." ""What angel wakes me from my flow'ry bed."" "Good form?" "He said that?" "Isn't he like super jock?" "Come on, keep going." "Demetrius says, "Yea, art thou there?"" ""Follow my voice:" "Will try no manhood here."" "You'll need that manhood for your jock boy!" "That's not what it means." "Manhood!" ""Courage!" "They're about to fight for love."" ""My gentle Puck, come hither." "Thou rememberest that very time I saw, but thou couldst not, Cupid all arm'd:" "a certain aim he took at a fair vestal throned by..."" ""Vestal throned by the west." "And loosed his love-shaft smartly from his bow," "As it should pierce a hundred thousand hearts;"" "Go on." ""Yet marked I where the bolt of Cupid fell:" "It fell upon a little western flower,"" ""Before milk-white, now purple with love's wound."" "Luscious." "Continue." ""Fetch me that flower;" "the herb I showed thee once:" "The juice of it on sleeping eye-lids laid" "Will make or man or woman madly dote" "Upon the next live creature that it sees."" ""I'll put a girdle round about the earth In forty minutes."" ""Having once this juice " ""I'll watch Titania when she is asleep" "And drop the liquor of it in her eyes."" ""The next thing then she waking looks upon..." "She shall pursue it with the soul of love."" "We'd love to have you stay for bible study." " I have wings to make." " It's a potluck!" "No, for my son." "He's a fairy." " A fairy?" " In a play." "Well, in real life, too." "He's gay." "My son is gay..." "Or queer." "But the wings are for the play." "A man shall not lie with man..." "Do you want the damn eye cream or not?" "Now, with the soul of love" "I ask of you the memorization of act three tonight." "Timothy." "How is your text coming?" "I'm trying, but I don't understand half of it." "Unite rhythm with words and they will unlock to empower you - like A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM come true." ""Take pains;" "be perfect: adieu."" "Down... up... 9!" "Down..." "up... 10!" "Who did it?" "Look who just flew in from Fairyland?" "Did you?" "Hey, bud, calm down." " Who did it?" " Let's walk." "Faggot!" "Fight!" "Fight!" "Look, guys!" "I caught a fairy!" "Leave the pansy alone." "Get out of here!" "He's not worth it." ""I'll put a girdle round about the earth In forty minutes."" "A girdle?" ""I'll put a girdle round about the earth..." "In forty minutes."" ""I'll put a girdle round about the earth..." ""I'll put a girdle round about the earth..." "Cupid's love juice..." "# I SEE THEIR KNAVERY #" "# THIS IS TO MAKE AN ASS OF ME #" "# TO FRIGHT ME IF THEY COULD... #" "# BUT I WILL NOT STIR FROM THIS PLACE #" "# DO WHAT THEY CAN #" "# I WILL WORK UP AND DOWN HERE... #" "# AND I WILL SING THAT THEY SHALL HEAR #" "# THAT I AM NOT #" "# I AM NOTAFRAID... #" "# I KNOW NOT BY WHAT POWER I AM MADE BOLD #" "# BUT STILL YOU FLOUT MY INSUFFICIENCY?" "#" "# THE MORE MY PRAYER THE LESSER IS MY GRACE #" "# MY EAR SHOULD CATCH YOUR VOICE #" "# MY EYE YOUR EYE #" "# MY TONGUE SHOULD CATCH #" "# YOUR TONGUE'S SWEET MELODY #" "# MY TONGUE YOUR TONGUE #" "# WERE THE WORLD MINE #" "# AND I WILL SING #" "# THAT THEY SHALL HEAR #" "# THAT I AM NOT #" "# I AM NOTAFRAID... #" "# FAIRIES AWAY #" "# FETCH ME THAT FLOWER #" "# UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN #" "# I WILL LEAD THEM UP AND DOWN #" "# FAIRIES AWAY SWIFT AS A SHADOW#" "# UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN #" "# I WILL LEAD THEM UP AND DOWN #" "# OH, WHY REBUKE YOU HIM #" "# THAT LOVES YOU SO?" "#" "# LAY BREATH SO BITTER ON YOUR BITTER FOE #" "# ON YOUR BITTER FOE #" "# WHAT ANGEL WAKES ME FROM MY FLOW'RY BED?" "#" "# I PRAY THEE GENTLE MORTAL #" "# SING AGAIN #" "# I PRAY THEE GENTLE MORTAL SING AGAIN #" "# MINE EAR IS MUCH ENAMOURED OF THY NOTE #" "# SO IS MINE EYE ENTHRALLED TO THY SHAPE #" "# I'LL FOLLOW THEE #" "# I'LL FOLLOW THEE..." "AND MAKE A HEAVEN OF HELL. #" "# I'LL FOLLOW THEE #" "# I'LL FOLLOW THEE..." "AND MAKE A HEAVEN OF HELL #" "# AND MAKE A HEAVEN OF HELL #" "# ALL FAIRIES AWAY!" "#" "# FETCH ME THAT FLOWER!" "#" "# UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN #" "# I WILL LEAD THEM UP AND DOWN. #" "# ALL FAIRIES AWAY #" "# SWIFT AS A SHADOW #" "# UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN #" "# I WILL LEAD THEM UP AND DOWN... #" "# ALL FAIRIES AWAY #" "# FETCH ME THAT FLOWER #" "# UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN #" "# I WILL LEAD THEM UP AND... #" "# ALL FAIRIES AWAY #" "# SWIFT AS A SHADOW #" "# UP AND DOWN UP AND DOWN #" "# I WILL LEAD THEM UP AND DOWN... #" "# MY EAR SHOULD CATCH YOUR VOICE #" "# MY EYE SHOULD CATCH YOUR EYE #" "# MY TONGUE YOUR TONGUE #" "# WERE THE WORLD MINE #" "Hey, I'm here." "Hold on." "Wait out there." "Hey, fairy boy, you start without me?" "What the..." "Are you OK?" ""How now, mad spirit?"" "Timmy?" "Oh, God, my mom!" "It's so hot in here!" "No!" "No!" "Timmy!" "Just stay in here." "Anything for you." "Shit!" "Mom, I... we're working." "Am I too old to date?" "We're really busy..." "You gotta see." "I almost finished your wings." "No!" "Mom, look, Max is gonna help me with my... stuff." "Fine." "Later?" "You should be proud!" "Your mom sold a lot of shit today!" "I missed you." "I'm not sure, but I think I did something to you." "No!" "Just stay there." "And put your shirt back on." "Where is that damn page?" ""I'll put a girdle round about the earth In forty minutes."" ""I'll put a girdle..." "Shit!" ""..." "In forty minutes."" "Don't they get how lucky they are to have you at their school?" "No, Max." "They don't." "That jock boy is really missing out." "Not for long." "Do you think these are too... small?" "Mom!" "You need to go home, OK?" "You need to go home and think about Frankie." "Don't tell a soul about this." "About us?" "My lips are sealed to quench your sweet desire." "Max, goodbye." ""Parting is such sweet sorrow!"" "What now?" "If you could make someone love you, would you?" "Shit." "Obviously." "I was asleep." "Max helped me with lines tonight." "Yeah?" "He really likes you." "Is that in danger of changing by tomorrow morning?" "He wanted you to know." "OK." "There was an accident." "What?" "I'll fix it." "I couldn't sleep either." "Isn't that your wedding dress?" "Was." "Don't run off and scare me like that again." ""But, gentle friend, for love and courtesy" "Lie further off;" "in human modesty."" ""Here is my bed:" "sleep, give thee all his rest!"" ""With half that wish the wisher's eyes be press'd!"" "Sleep!" ""Through the forest have I gone." "But Athenian found I none," "On whose eyes I might approve" "This flower's force in stirring love." "Night and silence." "Who is here?" "Weeds of Athens he doth wear." "And the maiden, sleeping sound," "On the dank and dirty ground."" "Fag." "Ahh, the fairy brought his own props." ""Churl, upon thy eyes I throw" "All the power this charm doth owe."" "Timothy?" "I can't see!" "What in hell?" "Careful there, Coach." "Timothy!" "What did you do to my boyfriend?" "I missed your bright eyes." " Come on!" " You promised!" "Don't leave me." "Gentlemen, this afternoon we focus on balance and coordination!" "Essential skills to hone for rugby won!" "Excellent!" "Onward to the field, gentles!" "Coach!" "I'll see you later, my prince!" "You're mocking me, right?" "You said he liked me." "How far I've chased you..." "Sweet, why flee so fast?" "You have practice!" "I can see your heart beating." "I'm not done here yet, sport!" "Is this the accident?" "You seducing my boyfriend?" " Boyfriend?" " Yeah!" "Max was the accident!" "I'll fix it, I promise." "Let's walk." "No!" "Timothy!" "What is wrong with you?" "What is wrong with all of you?" "!" "This is really fucked up!" "Donna, darling..." "I have got to say," "I vacillated after that first meeting, but you surprise me daily." "First impressions aren't my thing." "They must be." "Lawrence says from the moment he first laid eyes upon me, it was true love." "Was it?" "There are no limitations." "I have none and you, too, can rise above." "Remember, what you believe, you will achieve." "Timothy... that's my son!" "Timothy!" "You know her?" "That's my mom." "I'm Jonathon." "You have a brilliant son." "Oh, shit!" "Sorry." "We just had our nails done." "Nora Fay!" "Mom, we've got to go." "We've got a lot of..." "practicing to do." "Timothy..." "pleasure to finally meet." "And Jonathon Cordon!" "You look quite luminous." "I'm in love." "Yes." "This is exactly what I meant by rising above, Donna." "Your son, compatriots with Morgan Hill's star rugby player!" "We're not compatriots." "We're boyfriends!" "I'm sorry." "We have got to go!" "Johnny!" "Your son is a homosexual?" "Ummm..." "Yes, he is." "Has your coach lost his mind?" "I've outgrown you." "Is this a joke?" "Don't mock my love." "Who would not change a raven for a dove?" "What?" "Fly away." "How could he not desire a woman?" "It's unnatural!" "Let's go!" "Wait here." "You better pick me up at seven!" "You can take your ugly makeup and shove it up your unlimited ass!" "May God bless you and show you the light!" "I got your back, Mom." "Both of you!" "Get out of my way!" "Timothy!" "What the hell is that?" "Ohhhh!" "My mascara!" "Let her walk in one of my shoes a while." "My eyes are tingling!" "Donna..." "Donna, Donna, Donna, Donna, Donna..." "Be not so bashful, darling rare divine, these luscious kissing cherry lips are mine." "I'd like to welcome everyone to the 56th Annual Morgan Hill Spring Festival!" "We are honored to have several special guests to help us ring in this weekend's festivities." "First and foremost, the honorable Mayor Robbins!" "We were also hoping to have a representative from one of our sponsors - my beautiful wife, Nora Bellinger - but she is most likely still out soliciting some lucky townsperson." "Let's not go." "Why?" "You're different now." "What about Cotton Candy Mountain?" "I'm don't think you're ready for this." "I cross my heart." "Seriously." "I was beaten up for being queer before I even knew what that was." "Don't worry." "I'll protect you." "I don't need someone to protect me." "You didn't even like me yesterday, remember?" "Sure, I did." "But I fell in love with you today." " Come on." " Stop." " You are perfection." " That's the pansy talking." "Come on!" "It'll be fun." "There's a kissing booth." "And last, but not least, our very own, Coach Driskill!" "I love this man!" "If he's here with that fag, I'll kill him!" "You are completely prettier than him." "I love this school." "Our love for one another shines brighter than the lights on this midway!" "I hate this town." "I can't wait to graduate and get the hell out of this place forever." "It's not that bad." "Try looking at it through my eyes." "What about your family?" "You mean my mom?" "Everyone." "It's just my mom..." "on a good day." " I don't want to go back." " To what?" "Real life." "This is real." "But so, so far from where I woke up this morning." "People were staring at us." "Stare back." "People are just jealous... 'cause I'm with the best fellow in town." "People can change." "If they experienced that, they might." "Look." "How many people are in this town?" "Ten-thousand, maybe." "Let's go." " Why?" " I've got people to change." "Game's over, sport!" "What?" "I missed you." "Get the hell off of him!" "Leave him alone!" "He's just messin' with your head." "He's mine!" "Stop teasing him and go back to your cheerleader!" "Any love I had for her is gone, I swear." "Max, you love Frankie!" "You know I know." "Yes!" "Thank you." "I love you." "When I vow, I weep." "My tears do tell the truth." "I am going insane, officially!" "Found the fags!" "You asshole!" "Stop it!" "He's mine!" "No!" "No!" "Can you please let me in on this!" "Who is this goddess?" "Nymph!" " Perfect!" " Divine!" "Timothy, I love you." "I swear on my life I do." "I love you more than he ever could." "Prove it!" "You want to fight?" "You're on, jock boy!" "Max!" " You comin'?" " Let loose!" "Be certain." "I don't love you anymore." "Follow, if you dare." "Get off me!" "Timothy, have we had our fun yet?" "Go away!" "Donna!" "Darling, please don't leave me out here alone." "Think of what we could do together!" "I am not a lesbian!" "Nora!" "Darling!" "Lawrence!" "I can see your light on." "Driskill, I have a wife!" "If she doesn't ask, you don't have to... tell." "# THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE NEVER DID RUN SMOOTH #" "# THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE NEVER DID RUN SMOOTH #" "# THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE NEVER DID RUN SMOOTH #" "# NO!" "NO!" "NO!" "#" "# THE COURSE OF TRUE LOVE NEVER DID RUN SMOOTH #" "# NO, NO, NO #" "Jock boy, shed none;" "it's all mine." "I fought with everything I had, but it wasn't enough." "My heart belongs to Jonathon." " I don't exist without you." " You do." "It's late." "You should go home." "Be gone then!" "...where moments ago the Mayor made the shocking announcement that he will be leaving his wife of 11 years." "He also said that Kingston will begin issuing marriage licenses to any couple in love." "The mayor issued this statement:" ""The Constitution prohibits the making of laws based on religion." "Therefore, excluding legions of citizens from this sanctified institution because of religious belief is immoral, unconstitutional and silly. "" "I woke up this morning with an extra skip in my step." "Timmy!" "There are dozens of local couples who are ready to take the plunge." "We'd only be guessing at how many couples have driven long distances today to take advantage of this landmark turn of events." "We've known each other for 20 years." "We've been neighbors." "And this morning we looked at each other and we just knew this was the right thing." "We have a new perspective on life." "What about family values?" "What about 'em?" "We have families." "We have values." "Come on, Frankie, answer the damn phone." "Over there, look!" "Gay... gay..." "gay and gay!" "We'll find him." "Driskill!" "Why the hell are you still here?" "I missed you." "What the hell's gotten in to you?" "That speech last night, the dancing at practice..." "We were refining the essentials needed to play a skillful game." "My wife wouldn't let me in the house last night." "That makes two of us - unlucky in love this morning." "She said, "The course of true love... never did run smooth."" "Oh, Lawrence!" "Dr. Bellinger!" "Open up!" "Dr. Bellinger, my family was eating dinner last night and Cole said, "I love Cooper!" "And I want everyone to know it."" "This is not my little Cole!" "There's been something odd about him ever since he started that play." "And now..." "Has it ever occurred to you that I have problems too?" "!" "You need to fix this!" "Dr. Bellinger!" "Look!" "They're everywhere." "Who's that?" "Donna, darling!" "Oh, shit." "Donna!" "Donna!" "I found her!" "Oh, Donna, look at you!" "How fresh and lovely you look this morning." "Go!" "He hasn't been here." "He'll turn up." "Yeah, in a ditch somewhere with a hole in his head!" "Don't get it." " What if it's him?" " What if it's not?" "Good morning." "Frankie!" "How's your song?" "Where's Timothy?" "He didn't come home last night." "Where is my son?" "There's a meeting at Morgan Hill." "Is he in trouble?" "You should come with me." "What about the play?" "The play will go on... just don't you forget your guitar." "I am not leaving my son in this place one day longer!" "Please stay calm, sir." "No one needs to remove their child from this institution!" "Where is Ms. Tebbit?" "This is my son." "I found him this morning in bed with his best friend Russ." "They were holding each other and kissing." "Believe me, I taught them both a lesson." ""The course of true love never did run smooth."" "What did you say?" "My son said the same thing!" "Ladies and gentlemen, what we have here is a kind of coercive persuasion." " I'm in love!" " No, you're not!" "Has everyone gone insane?" "He's in love!" "Love!" "The Bible states that homosexuality is contagious - in all sorts of ways." "It's that alternative teacher and her Shakespeare!" "Shakespeare was queer, too!" " It's wicked!" " Do something!" "Ladies and Gentlemen," "A MIDSUMMER NIGHT'S DREAM is hereby cancelled." "No!" "That is entirely unfair to the boys!" "They've been working so hard..." "And I am putting Ms. Tebbit under a full investigation." "Firstly..." "Mr. William Shakespeare has never been proven to be a homosexual." "Bisexual, perhaps." "Regardless, if you will all kindly return this evening for the play, I'm sure we will all make amends." " My son's not coming!" " No!" "The play must go on!" "Your concerns will fade like a nightmare, or with any luck, a clandestine dream come true." "I must locate your son." "My words will appease them only momentarily." "We looked everywhere." "I have a notion." "# OVER HILL, OVER DALE, #" "# THOROUGH BUSH, THOROUGH BRIER, #" "# OVER PARK, OVER PALE, #" "# THOROUGH FLOOD, THOROUGH FIRE #" ""I do wander everywhere."" "# SWIFTER THAN THE MOON'S SPHERE... #" "# WHAT HAVE WE DONE?" "#" "# WE HAVE MISTAKEN QUITE #" "# AND LAID THE LOVE JUICE #" "# ON SOME TRUE LOVE'S SIGHT #" "# THIEVES OF LOVE!" "#" "# WE'VE COME BY NIGHT #" "# AND STOLEN LOVERS' HEARTS AWAY IN SPITE #" "Let me go!" "Let me go!" "# THE WILL OF MAN #" "# IS BY YOUR REASON SWAY'D #" "# WITH SUCH FORCE AND BLESSED POWER #" "# WITH ALL GOOD WILL #" "# WITH ALL MY HEART #" "# ALL THINGS SHALL BE PEACE #" "# SO FAR BLAMELESS #" "# PROVES MY ENTERPRISE, #" "# THAT I HAVE 'NOINTED THOSE POOR SOULS' EYES #" "Think of your friends, your family." "No!" "# SO FAR AM I GLAD IT SO DID SORT #" "# AS THIS THEIR JANGLING I ESTEEM A SPORT #" "# THE WILL OF MAN IS BY YOUR REASON SWAY'D, #" "# WITH SUCH FORCE AND BLESSED POWER #" "# WITH ALL GOOD WILL, WITH ALL MY HEART, #" "# ALL THINGS SHALL BE PEACE #" "# WE FAIRIES, #" "# THAT DO RUN #" "# FROM THE PRESENCE #" "# OF THE SUN, #" "# WE FOLLOW DARKNESS LIKE A DREAM...#" "# BE AS THOU WAST WONT TO BE #" "# SEE AS THOU WAST WONT TO SEE... #" ""Will you rent our ancient love asunder?"" "# TAKE COMFORT #" "# HE NO MORE SHALL SEE MY FACE; #" "# WHOM I DO LOVE AND WILL DO TILL MY DEATH #" "# BE AS THOU WAST WONT TO BE; #" "# SEE AS THOU WAST WONT TO SEE #" "# BE AS THOU WAST WONT TO BE; #" "# SEE AS THOU WAST WONT TO SEE... #" ""I have a device to make all well." "Crush this herb into the lovers eyes" "Whose liquor hath this virtuous property," "To take from thence all error with their might," "And make their eyeballs roll with wonted sight." "When next they wake, all this derision" "Shall seem a dream and fruitless vision."" "Don't haste, get to the play tonight," "And with some luck there, all things shall be right!" ""I swear to thee, by Cupid's strongest bow," "By all the vows that ever men have broke..."" "I'll be there." "# ALL THINGS SHALL BE PEACE #" "Hi, Sugar." "I've got to get you to the school." ""Follow my voice:" "we'll try no manhood here."" ""The villain is much lighter-heel'd than I:" "I follow'd fast, but faster he did fly;" "Come, thou gentle day!" "For if but once thou show me thy grey light," "I'll find Demetrius and revenge this spite."" ""Ho, ho, ho!" "Coward, why comest thou not?"" ""Where art thou now?"" ""Come hither:" "I am here."" ""Nay, then, thou mock'st me." "Thou shalt buy this dear," "If ever I thy face by daylight see:" "Now, go thy way." "Faintness constraineth me" "To measure out my length on this cold bed."" "He's gathering all the mixed up lovers so he can fix them." ""O weary night, O long and tedious night,"" "Free will must be restored." ""Abate thy hour!" "And sleep, that sometimes shuts up sorrow's eye," "Steal me awhile from mine own company."" ""Yet but three?" "Come one more;" "Two of both kinds make up four." "Here she comes, curst and sad:" "Cupid is a knavish lad, Thus to make poor females mad."" ""Never so weary, never so in woe," "Bedabbled with the dew and torn with briers," "I can no further crawl, no further go;" "My legs can keep no pace with my desires."" "Sing!" "# ON THE GROUND #" "# SLEEP SOUND... #" "# I'LL APPLY TO YOUR EYE, #" "# GENTLE LOVER, REMEDY #" "Go on." "# WHEN THOU WAKEST THOU TAKEST #" "# TRUE DELIGHT IN THE SIGHT #" "# OF THY FORMER LADY'S EYE: #" "# JACK SHALL HAVE JILL; #" "# NOUGHT SHALL GO ILL; #" "# THE MAN SHALL HAVE HIS MARE AGAIN #" "# AND ALL SHALL BE WELL #" "Goodbye." "This part of the show?" "Damn, this is cool." " Get off me, dude." " Sorry." "Come along, please." "The finale." "Frankie, you're on!" ""I will hear that play;" "For never anything can be amiss," "When simpleness and duty tender it."" "# GENTLES, PERCHANCE YOU WONDER AT THIS SHOW; #" "# BUT WONDER ON, #" "# TILL TRUTH MAKES ALL THINGS PLAIN #" "# THIS MAN IS PYRAMUS, IF YOU WOULD KNOW; #" "# THIS BEAUTEOUS LADY THISBY IS CERTAIN... # 2, 3, 4..." "# BY MOONSHINE DID THESE LOVERS THINK #" "# NO SCORN MET AT A TOMB #" "# TO WOO BY PALE MOONLIGHT #" "# THIS GRISLY BEAST, WHICH LION HIGHT BY NAME, #" "# THE TRUSTY THISBY, COMING FIRST BY NIGHT... #" "That's my girlfriend!" "She fuckin' rocks!" "# IF WE OFFEND, WE GOT GOOD WILL #" "# IF WE ARE CRUDE, OUR MEASURES PLAIN!" "#" "# OUR TRUE INTENT IS YOUR DELIGHT #" "# IT'S MERRY!" "TRAGICAL!" "AND BRIEF!" "#" "# OH, PYRAMUS, #" "# PYRAMUS LOVED THISBY #" "# AND, AS SHE FLED, HER MANTLE SHE DID FALL, #" "# WHICH LION VILE WITH BLOODY MOUTH DID STAIN #" "# ANON COMES PYRAMUS, SWEET YOUTH AND TALL, #" "# AND FINDS HIS TRUSTY THISBY'S MANTLE SLAIN... #" "# WHEREAT, WITH BLADE, #" "# WITH BLOODY BLAMEFUL BLADE, #" "# HE BRAVELY BROACH'D HIS BOILING BLOODY BREAST; #" "# THUS HE DIED #" "# HE DIED, HE DIED #" "# HIS SOUL IS IN THE SKY #" "# NOW THISBY'S PASSION ENDS THE PLAY IN TEARS, #" "# ASLEEP, MY LOVE?" "WHAT, DEAD, MY DOVE?" "#" "# ARISE!" "#" "# TONGUE NOT A WORD: #" "# COME BLADE MY BREAST IMBRUE: #" "# THUS THIS BY ENDS;" "ADIEU, ADIEU, ADIEU. #" "# ADIEU, ADIEU, ADIEU, ADIEU!" "#" "# IF WE OFFEND, WE GOT GOOD WILL #" "# IF WE ARE CRUDE, OUR MEASURES PLAIN!" "#" "# OUR TRUE INTENT IS YOUR DELIGHT #" "# IT'S MERRY!" "TRAGICAL!" "BRIEF!" "#" "# OH, PYRAMUS, #" "# PYRAMUS LOVED THIS BY... #" "# OH, PYRAMUS, #" "# PYRAMUS LOVED THIS BY #" "Nora?" "It's time to fly." ""If we shadows have offended," "Think but this, and all is mended," "That you have but slumber'd here" "While these visions did appear" "And this weak and idle theme," "No more yielding but a dream," "Gentles, do not reprehend:" "If you pardon, we will mend:" "And, as I am an honest Puck," "If we have unearned luck" "Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue," "We will make amends ere long;" "Else the Puck a liar call;" "So, good night unto you all." "Give me your hands, if we be friends," "And Robin shall restore amends."" "Donna, darling... will you join me for next week's seminar?" "OK." "Yes, of course." "You're very lucky to have such a marvelously talented son." "Goodnight." "You know, when I was in high-school," "I made quite a dashing Oberon." "I bet you did." "Good evening, Coach." "What a talented bunch!" "Indeed." "See you on Monday, Coach?" "Evening, Nora." "Goodnight." "You were unbelievable tonight." "Don't you feel..." "I feel like myself." ""It's not enough to speak, but to speak true."" "Dude, awesome job!" "You two love birds better be at my party." "It's gonna be beyond!" "Who's next?" "Subtitles by LeapinLar"