"[♪♪]" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Moving vans and boxes." "Packing and unpacking." "That's pretty much been my life for as long as I can remember." "My name is Davis Pell." "Because of my mom's job, we've had to move around a lot." "I only just moved to America from Australia." "When you're always the new kid, it's pretty hard to make friends." "Most of the time, it's just me hanging by myself." "Never having a chance to settle down can be a bit lonely, but I've found ways to keep things..." " MAN:" "Uh-aw!" " DAVIS: interesting." "Couldn't be." " MAN:" "Oh-ah!" "[♪♪]" " [grunting]" " Ah!" " Oooh!" " Rayzon, you followed me to America?" " I would go anywhere to finally destroy you," "Davis Pell." "Even suburban Seattle." " Let's end this." " [grunting]" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "It's possible" "I'm not the coolest guy in the world." "In fact, most people would say I'm kind of a dork." "And you know what?" "Uh!" "They might have a point." "I mean, look at this." "I'm having an imaginary fight, and I'm losing." "[grunting]" "But not anymore." "I'm at a new school." "Heck, I'm in a new country." "Things this year will be different." "I'm going to have friends." "I'm gonna be popular." "Maybe I'll even get a girlfriend for once." "Whatever it takes." "Starting this year," "Davis Pell isn't going to be a loser anymore." "Uh!" " [applause]" " I think you got 'em." " You didn't see all of that, did you?" " I think I can safely say" "I didn't see much as you and Rayzon did." " [nervous laughing] Rayzon." " Yeah." " Yeah." "So... you live next door?" " No, just a big fan of porch swings." "Travelling the country porch swing to porch swing." " I hope that works out for you." " Wait!" "Don't move!" "Shhhw." "There was one behind you." " Thanks, Katniss." " No charge." " Hey, I was wondering." "Maybe because I'm new in town and all that, that maybe you could..." " Uh, uh, uh, turn it around, ninja warrior." "I don't date boys who play make-believe." " Right, got it." "You're probably wondering about the kaleidoscopes." "My mom gets me one every time we move." "Told you we moved a lot." "I've been collecting them since I was a kid." "I don't know what it is about them." "I guess I just like having something to show for all the places that I've lived." "You also might have noticed that sometimes" "I like to imagine stuff the way I'd want it to be instead of how it really is." "You know, like daydreaming." "Let's just say that my daydreams are little more colorful than most." "[♪♪]" " [knocking at door]" " Hi, honey." " Hey, mom." " Are you excited to meet all your new classmates tomorrow?" " Excited?" "Um, have we met before?" " [laughs]" "I'm sure you could have plenty of mates if you tried." " Yeah." "Let me guess, if I just be myself." " [laughs] Oh, honey, it's high school." "Nobody's really themselves yet." " Mm." " Things will look brighter in the morning." "[♪♪]" " Yeah, you're right." "Things do look much brighter." " [laughs]" "Here's your lunch." " Weird health food?" " With all your allergies, yes." "Oh, and..." "Ta-da!" " [groans]" " Your lucky first day sweater." " No, mom, I thought you burned that." " You've worn it on your first day for the last five years." " And every year has been a complete disaster." "It kind of defeats the purpose of having a lucky sweater, now doesn't it?" "It's horrible, and it's too small, ma." "I can't wear it." " No, it's not." "It's perfect." "Your grandmother made it." " And Nana is legally blind." "Mom, okay, I'm not wearing it." "I'm not." "[♪♪]" " Can I help you?" " I'm supposed to get a schedule." " I'll pull it up for you." " Hi, everyone, I'm Caitlyn Crisp, reminding you that Forksley High is recycle friendly." "We can save the planet." "We only have one Earth, you guys." "So let's all pitch in and treat it right." "The Earth likes you, and I like you, too." "[♪♪]" " What's that?" " Your schedule." "You just asked for it." " Thank you." " [thunder rumbles]" " Pull it together, Davis." "You can do this." "Sorry, Nana." " CAITLYN:" "Hi, everyone." "It's Caitlyn Crisp again." "And on this edition of "Caitlyn's World,"" "I'll be talking about the hottest event of the season..." "This fall's Sweetheart Dance at Forksley High." "You don't want to miss a minute of it." " What's the matter?" "That last blog that you posted on your site was amazing." " I know." "And I love that people love my videos." "But still, I can't help but feel like there's something missing." " What do you mean?" " People in this school look to me to make their life more fulfilling." "And I just keep giving them more of the same." "There's got to be something new." " [struggling]" " I want adventure." " Uh!" " Excitement." " [thunder rumbles]" " Maybe even danger." " [struggling]" "Ugh!" "[♪♪]" " DAVIS:" "Okay." "Let's do this." " CAITLYN:" "I don't know what it is." "But I do know one thing." "It's out there waiting for me." " [thunder rumbles]" " [door squeaks open]" " [gasps]" " [thunder rumbles]" " [electricity buzzes]" " Who are you?" " I'm new." " Oh, the new guy." "You care to introduce yourself to the rest of the class?" " No." " Good, take a seat." "[♪♪]" " [heavy breathing]" " [indistinct chatter]" " [gulps]" "[♪♪]" " Here, let me help." "[giggles]" " Thanks." " Cool accent." "Is it real?" " Why would I fake an accent?" " To sound cool." " You think I sound cool?" " See you around." "There's definitely something interesting about him." " GIRL:" "Love the accent." " [bell rings]" " [sighs]" " [giggles]" " [sighs]" " How did you do that?" " Do what?" " Hey." "Who are you?" " I..." "I... see ya." " Who was that guy?" " I don't know." " [heavy breathing]" " CAITLYN:" "How did he get all the way down there?" " A vampire?" " I'm telling you." "He didn't have a reflection." "I didn't see it with my own eyes." "He could be exactly what I'm looking for." " What about Bon?" " The Bon's a little bit simple." "[gasps]" "Not you, Bon, another Bon." "He's so mysterious." " Look at him trying to eat human food." " ALL:" "Aw." " [gasps]" "I have an idea." " Bon, does that pizza have garlic in it?" " Yeah." " Perfect." "I saw you weren't enjoying your food." "You should have this instead." " Wow, that's really nice of you and all, but I..." "I can't actually eat that." "I'm allergic." " To the garlic?" " Uh, well... yeah, and the cheese and the yeast and..." "Basically the whole pizza." " Yeah, but one little bite can't hurt." " Yeah, I mean, one bite can't hurt that much." "I mean, how allergic can I really be?" " Mm-hmm." " [kids laughing]" " Uh... it was delicious." "Thanks." "[sighs]" " No, I don't like it." " What, Bon?" " The poster, I don't like." " Uh, yeah, I don't like it either." " Well, I guess you guys don't need me here for this." "I'm just gonna head out." " [laughing]" " We should take it down." " Yeah." " Wait, wait, guys." "We can talk about this, right?" "We can talk about this, please." " Did you see how he reacted to the garlic?" " Everybody saw!" " [squeals]" "What happened to Bon and the guys?" "[gasps]" "Oh, no!" " [indistinct chatter]" " [laughing]" " [gasps]" " Oh my gosh." " O-M-G, he's sparkling." "Pics or it didn't happen." " [gasping]" " You have to send that to me." "[giggling]" " Oh my gosh." " Wow." " [doorbell rings]" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Oh, please." "Kill me now." " Come with me." " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Looks like I'm gonna get my wish." "She does plan on killing me." "Probably leave my body in the woods." " Do you feel like you can be honest with me?" " Uh... sure." " You're pale and you dress strangely." " Oh, you're starting with the honesty." " Tell me what you are." " What do you mean?" " You're awkward." "You really don't say anything interesting." " Oh, you should be a motivational speaker." " But I find myself drawn to you." " What was that?" " You don't have a reflection in the mirror." "You can't eat normal food." "And you sparkle in direct sunlight." " I sparkle?" "I'm sparkling." " Say it." " Say what?" " I know what you are." " You do?" " Yes, I do." "Say it out loud." " Uh, I..." "I..." "I'm pale." "No reflection." "Uh, sparkling..." "like a vampire." " Uh!" "It's true?" " Sure." " [gasps]" "Please promise to meet me by the first tree at the school entrance at 8:30 tomorrow." " Okay." " [squealing with joy]" " [sighs] Oh, boy." "I'm dead." " [sighs]" "You look so cool." " Thanks." " Let's go in." " We just walk in like in front of everyone?" " Mm-hmm." "Come on." " [indistinct chatter]" " CAITLYN:" "Oh, hi, Bon." " BON:" "No way." " [indistinct chatter]" " Is it true?" " Is it true?" "What do you think?" " This is totally the most amazing thing to ever happen at this cool." "It's true, Davis Pell is a really, actually... a vampire." " Psst." "Does this happen to you a lot?" "Do you go to new schools and people think you're a supernatural creature?" "Oh, were you Rocky Raccoon at your last school?" " What makes you think I'm not really a vampire?" " You act like you're 14, not 400." "You go out during the day, which pretty much goes against the most basic tenant of vampire lure." "And you are in no way suave." "Oh, yeah, and vampires aren't real." "Don't worry, I'm not going to say anything." " Why not?" " Because you're making everybody look like idiots." "I kind of love that." "But some advice." "You're going to have to step up your game if you want to keep this up." "[♪♪]" " Ah!" "Ha!" "This isn't working." "Wah, wah, ha, ha!" "Ugh, no, no." "[♪♪]" " [phone beeps]" " Hey, Vi." "Thanks for helping me out with this." "You know, I've been up all night trying to figure this vampire thing out." " Well, I decided if you're going to make a mockery of my school's social order, then I want in." "And you definitely need my help." " That's true." " Now, I'm going to get you looking the part, but you've got to get yourself sounding the part." "Talk to me like you're really a vampire." " Okay." "[in accent] I'm totally a vampire." " What was that?" " It was a vampire." " For someone who already has an accent, you're terrible at accents." " Okay, well, first off, I'm not the one with an accent." "You are." " Oh." " And secondly, just tell me how I should sound." " Okay." "The modern vampire is more of a cross between a constipated model and a freshman poetry major." " What?" " Okay, repeat after me." "You wouldn't understand." " You wouldn't understand." " More like you don't want to deal with anything." " Should it really be this much work to seem like I don't care?" " For you, yes." " Thanks for helping me pick out all these clothes." " No charge, Edward Cullen." "[giggles]" "Okay, how's the vampire voice coming?" " Oh." "[clears throat]" "You wouldn't understand." " [giggles]" "Not bad." " Yeah?" "So what else is there to know about vampires?" "Like I know all the regular stuff like wooden stakes and sunlight and all that stuff." "But what else?" " There's a couple things." "For instance, vampires are terrified of rabbits." "They're incapable of singing "Happy Birthday."" "Oh, and this is an important one." "If you beat a vampire in a staring contest, it renders them powerless." " A staring contest?" " Mm-hmm." " Really?" " Mm-hmm." " I don't believe you." " Fine, you don't have to believe me." "Here's proof." " Doh!" "Okay!" " [laughing]" " Okay, you win." "But seriously, we really need to figure a way we can sell this at school." " Don't worry." "I have a few ideas." "Now you got the hair and the clothes." "Okay, let's start with the basics." "Wear these at all times." "[♪♪]" " Perfect." " [yawns]" " He showed me his fangs." "[laughing]" " GIRL:" "It's just like Edward." " Oops." " GIRL:" "Oh my gosh, he's so cute." " Okay, vampires' eyes are always changing colors." "So you're going to need to wear these contact lenses." " GIRL:" "There he is." "Turn around." "Look at his eyes." "[giggling]" " [laughs]" "[♪♪]" " And on this edition of "Caitlyn's World,"" "Forksley High's very own bloodsucker Davis Pell." " VI:" "Some vampires can fly." "So we've got to get you off the ground." " Look!" "[♪♪]" " [laughs] Oh, yeah." " [indistinct chatter]" " There's no way." "[♪♪]" " [indistinct chatter]" " How did he do that?" "[♪♪]" " CAITLYN:" "Today on "Caitlyn's World,"" "I have a story you can really sink your teeth into." "Davis Pell, undead and loving it." "How old are you?" " [laughing]" "Time... is for those waiting to die." " So true." "So true." "And this week's winner of the smile contest is Davis Pell." "Thanks to all my new followers for logging on to vote." "Looking towards the future, will you be attending" "Forksley High's annual Sweetheart Dance?" " If you'll be my date." " Of course." "[giggling]" "[♪♪]" "♪ So get your game on" "♪ Get, get your game on" "♪" "♪ So get your game on" "♪ Get, get your game on ♪" " This guy comes into our school, steals are girls, our friends, our pizza slices." "Why?" "Because he's a vampire." "Well, I'm a quarterback." "And I was here first." " Yeah!" "Let's go, baby!" "Whoo!" " I was more complaining." "It wasn't really anything to get excited about." " You were using your huddle voice." " Is that what I sound like?" " Hey, I have an idea." "I have this uncle who's way into vampires." "He can maybe help us." " Call him." " Okay." "But I have to warn you." "He's a little weird." " Call him!" " [phone ringing]" " Hello?" " BOY:" "Uncle Derrick?" " Oh?" " Is this..." "Baron Von Awesome?" " [giggles]" "If what you're saying is true, and I have been noticing a number of signs indicating just such an occurrence," "I will stalk the monster and I will kill it." " How do we know you can do it?" "What's your story?" " My story?" "[laughing]" "I was born in a graveyard at midnight." " Whoa." " And still an infant, I was abandoned." "I found myself nursing from a mother emu." "She took me in, and her family raised me as her own." "They taught me how to hunt." "And how to kill." " What does any of this have to do with vampires?" " My skills are vast, I assure you." "I have the yellow belt in nine different forms of "ka-ra-tay,"" "which technically makes me a third degree black belt." "And I've defeated the game Castlevania, every version of it." "And I have seen the movie "Van Helsing" 47 times!" "And I hated that movie." " That... that's all great, but how is it going to help you get this guy?" " [laughs]" "Mark my words." "I will hunt this creature down to the ends of the world." "There is nowhere he can hide." " Finding him won't be a problem." " Excellent." " Which one is he?" " He's right there." " Excellent." " So, what's your plan?" " This container is filled with water caught from the base of the Carpathian Mountains." "It is renowned for its vampire-killing properties." "When I spill it on him, it's going to be poof... goodbye, vampire boy!" "[laughing]" " [laughing]" " Sssh, sssh, sh, sh." "Sssh." "Hello!" " Can I help you?" " Yeah." "I am the water delivery person." "And I'm here to deliver the water." " TEACHER:" "No water here." "You probably want the teacher's lounge." " Or perhaps... or perhaps it was right here!" " [gasps]" " Ah!" "Evil creature!" "[manically laughing]" "Drink this up you nasty, smelly thing from beyond!" "[unintelligible] terror." "Yeah." " Mm." "I guess we're gonna need a mop." " Hey, Vi." " So, this is what your lair looks like." "I expected more candelabras and flowy curtains." " Ha, ha, very funny." " [laughs]" " So... how do I look?" " Not to feed your already rapidly growing ego, but you do look relatively presentable tonight." " [laughs] You're so sweet." " Mmm." "[giggles]" "So... what's with all the telescopes?" " They're kaleidoscopes." " Why do you have all of them?" " Oh, well, my mom gets me one every time we move." " Wow, you do move a lot." " [laughs]" "Yeah, I know it's weird, but it makes my mom happy, so... and actually, I..." "I kind of like them, too." "They're pretty much the only things I really have from all the places that I've lived." " I don't think they're weird at all." "I like them." "They're cool." " Thanks." " So... [giggles]" "You got your dancing shoes on?" " [chuckles] I don't know about that one." " Oh, of course." "Get over here." " What?" "Why?" " I'm going to teach you how to slow dance." " What makes you think that I...?" "Okay." "I don't know how to slow dance." " [giggles]" "Okay, so you're going to put your hands there." " Yeah." " And I'll put my hands there." "You rock back and forth." "You can start to spin." " Okay." " And you can occasionally look at the girl." "[laughing] Yeah." " [laughing] Yeah." "Am... am I doing it right?" " Yeah." "[♪♪]" " [horn honks]" " MOM:" "Davis, your girlfriend's here." " Bye." " Hey." "You should come to the dance tonight." " Definitely not my scene." " There's a good chance I might make a fool of myself." " Slightly more tempting." " [laughs]" " But alas, I don't have anything quite darling enough to wear to such an occasion." " Well, I'm sure you'd look good in anything you wore." "Anyways, see ya." " CAITLYN:" "You look great." " DAVIS:" "Thanks." "You, too." " [engine starts]" "[♪♪]" " [indistinct cheering]" " [applause]" " Let's go sit down." "[♪♪]" " You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen." " In all your lives?" " [laughs] Yes." "In every single one of 'em." " [giggles]" " That's not fair." "That's my girl." " Okay." "You know I am the head cheerleader." " Quiet, Not Caitlyn." " Ugh!" " Hey, hey." "Check it out." " [whistling]" "Hello." " Oh, hey." "Have you see Davis?" " No." " Hello, everyone, can I have your attention, please?" "It is now time to announce the Sweetheart Couple." "Now there were a lot of really cute couples this year." "But unfortunately, there can only be one." "This year's Mr. and Miss Sweetheart are..." "Caitlyn Crisp and Davis Pell!" " [crowd cheering]" " And now for the spotlight dance." " [applause]" "[♪♪]" " [music changes]" " Ooh, my gosh, I love this song!" "I have to go get the girls." "[♪♪]" "♪ Buckle up and hold on tight ♪" "♪ All abroad on this endless ride to forever ♪" "♪ Until forever" "♪ Every night I feel so alive" "♪ These are the signs of the endless night ♪" "♪ Forever" "♪ Until forever" "♪" " [cheering]" " Why aren't you doing anything?" " This guy is a clever one." "My plan is to study him and then destroy him!" " Oh, you are so fired!" "[♪♪]" "♪ Forever" "♪ Until forever" "♪ And ever" "♪ And ever" "♪♪" " [crowd cheering]" " [laughing]" " CAITLYN:" "Tonight was so much fun." " Yeah, it was the best." "Caitlyn, there's something I need to talk to you about." " Oh, no, not tonight." "Uh, I'm exhausted." "Let's talk about it tomorrow, okay?" " No, no, no." "It's important." "And I've been meaning to tell you this for a while now," "I just didn't know how." " You want to make our relationship official?" " No." "No, I mean, yes, of course I do." "It's just that..." " No, no, no, no." "I'm too excited." "I have to go tell the girls." "[gasps]" "Come over to my house on Friday, and we'll go over everything, okay?" " Yeah." "Okay, great." " GIRL:" "Do you really think that Caitlyn's going to go through with it?" " Why wouldn't she?" "Wouldn't you?" " GIRL:" "Totally." "It's like the coolest thing to happen to anyone." " I can't believe Davis Pell is going to turn Caitlyn Crisp into a vampire." "I'm so jealous." " Caitlyn is telling everybody that you're going to turn her into a vampire on Friday." " What?" "Oh, come on, she can't actually believe that." " Uh, you're talking about the girl that already believes you're a real-life vampire." "She's expecting you to bite her on the neck and turn her into a vampire." "You can't let this go on." "It's too far." " I tried to tell her." " But you didn't." " I thought we were having fun." " Davis, you're the only one who's having fun anymore." " Oh, I see now." "You're jealous." " [giggles]" "You think I'm jealous of Caitlyn?" " No." "I think you're jealous of me for being popular." "Why would you be jealous of Caitlyn?" " No reason." "No reason at all." "Have a great time Friday night." " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Okay, here we go." " [knocking on door]" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "I don't know what I'm worrying about." "I mean, she likes me, right?" "I can just confess, and we can just put all of this behind us." "Hey, Caitlyn." "I've got something to confess to you." "I'm not really a vampire." " Oh, Davis." "I don't care about that." "I like you for you." "Now kiss me." " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Come on, Davis, hold it together." "Just tell her the truth, and everything will be fine." "Besides, she can't really think" "I'm going to turn her into a vampire." "Uh-oh." "It looks like you've got a nice place here." "If I could actually see anything." " Come." " Caitlyn, there's... there's something" "I've been meaning to tell you." " Bite me." " Uh, well... you see, there's something that I really need to tell you." " Ssh, don't spoil the moment with your talking." "Just do it." " Okay." "Ugh, Caitlyn, there's a whole bunch of people here." " Mm-hmm." "Better not disappoint." " I have to pee." " [groans]" " Ready?" " Mm-mm." " [screams]" " How does it feel?" " It doesn't really feel like anything." " Uh, that's how it's supposed to feel." "That means it's working." "That means it's working!" " GIRL:" "You didn't even bite her." " He can't turn her." " May... maybe it just didn't take." "I'll try again." "Let me try again." " [gasps]" " It's ketchup." "I knew it." "He's a liar!" "He's a faker!" " DAVIS:" "Dude, it was just a joke." "Guys, it's just me Davis." "It's just me Davis, guys." "It's just me Davis." "Guys, I was joking." "It was a joke." "We can talk about this, right?" "Can't you take a joke?" " [crowd oohs]" " [gasps] I guess he wasn't a vampire after all." "Come on." "[♪♪]" " That is just what he wants you to think." "His time will come." "[chuckles]" " Hey, honey." " DAVIS: [groans]" " You okay?" " [sighs] Yeah." "I'm just gonna go to bed." " Are you sure you're all right?" " DAVIS:" "Yes, mom, I'm fine." " [sighs]" "I know it's tough on you sometimes with all the moving and the changes." "I am sorry you have to go through that all the time." " Okay." "Thanks." " Do you know why" "I get you a kaleidoscope every time we move?" " Why, mom?" " Because you look in it, and it's beautiful." "But the slightest turn of the wheel... can change everything." "Thing is, that change can be beautiful, too." "Sometimes maybe even more beautiful than it was before." " This change stinks." " I know." "You know, with everything that's happened since you arrived," "I'm sure there's something here you think is beautiful." "[♪♪]" " [indistinct chatter]" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Have you ever really not wanted to go to school?" "Like you have a zit or a test you didn't study for?" " Loser!" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "This was like all those times combined." " Liar!" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Times like 40 billion." " Jerk!" " Okay, it sounds great." " Okay, stop it right there." "Yeah, no, add that to the second clip." " Like a vampire." " It's true?" " Yeah." " CAITLYN:" "Play it back." "Please promise to meet me by the first tree..." " Hey, Caitlyn." " What are you doing here?" " I don't remember there being any cameras there." "What are you working on?" " Nothing." "It has nothing to do with you." " I'm not too sure that's true." " Would you just go?" "I can't even look at you." " [sighs]" " DAVIS:" "Okay, I just..." "I just wanted to tell you that what I did was wrong, and I'm a complete goon." "And..." "I'm sorry." " No, Davis, I'm sorry... for you." "You're a sad person, and you should go." " Yeah." " CAITLYN:" "Get back to work." "I'm gonna check my site." "[gasps] Oh my gosh!" "Ten thousand subscribers!" "I've gone national!" " [cheering]" " Oh, I just lost one." " [sighs]" " Psst, hey." " What do you want?" "Need more footage of me acting like a jerk?" " No, I've got plenty of that." "I want to give you something." " What is it?" " Just watch." "It'll help you, believe me." " Why are you helping me?" " [sighs]" "I too know what it's like to try to be someone you're not for a woman's affections." " For Rita?" " I like her, but I hate video cameras." " Cut." "Did you get that?" " BOY:" "Yeah, I got it." " You better have, because I'm not doing it again." " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Here it was, the ugly truth." "And no daydream could ever cover it up." "What I saw in that video was so shocking, so mind blowing, so life altering, if I ever hope to show my face at that school again," "I had to show everyone what I had just seen." "I had to fix everything." "But how?" "[♪♪]" " MAN:" "Whoo-ha-ha-ha!" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "I had set a plan in motion for the Creepy Carnival." "And I had just the right costume." "Actually, it was my only costume." " Ooh." " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "Now it was go time." "But first things first." "[♪♪]" " Dracula?" "Really?" " Don't be afraid." "I'm not actually a vampire." " I gotta get back to the haunted house." " No, wait." "I just wanted to tell you that when I started doing all of this, all this pretending..." "I thought it'd be the only way that I'd finally get some real friends." " I'd say you made plenty." " No." "Just one." "Here, I want you to have this." "Anyways, I'll..." "I'll talk to you later." ""Sometimes I pretend things are what they really aren't." ""But with you, I don't need to pretend." ""You make real life way better than make believe." "Davis."" " [applause]" " Hi, everyone." "And welcome to Forksley High's Creepy Carnival." "Tonight, we'll be showing" ""The Revenge of the Creature from the Black Lagoon."" " [crowd booing]" " What are you doing here?" " [crowd booing]" " Everyone, I've got something to tell you." "I have something to show you." " [booing continues]" " Liar!" " Liar!" " Loser!" " Loser!" "Lame-o!" "Those are all names that I deserve to be called." "And those are just the Ls." "I owe all of you a sincere apology." "Except for one person." "Caitlyn Crisp." " [crowd gasps]" " Caitlyn Crisp has used and lied to every single one of us." "And I have proof." "This is what Caitlyn Crisp really is." "[♪♪]" " [crowd ahs]" " [woman screams]" " [indistinct chatter]" " Okay, that's... that's obviously not Caitlyn Crisp." "That is the Creature from the Black Lagoon." "Looks pretty good." " I don't know what this hurtful liar is trying to prove, but we can all agree it's pathetic." " [audience agrees]" " Cut." "Did you get that?" " BOY:" "Yeah, I got it." " Is that thing off?" " BOY:" "I turned it off." " Good." "You know, I just can't stop thinking about all these idiots who actually believe this vampire stuff is real." "What a bunch of boosers and followers." " What?" " Are you helping Davis take down Caitlyn?" " Kinda." " I didn't think you had it in you." " Of course all the students at school are sheep who will do anything I say anyway." "Oh, no, no, no." "Bon, stop him." " [phone ringing]" " Wait." " It's Bon, again." "Oh, no." "When are you going to realize you're just high-school arm candy?" "What an idiot." "End call." "Okay." "Ah!" " This is your beloved Caitlyn." "She has made a fool out of all of us." " CAITLYN:" "That's not true." "The great thing about high school being a popularity contest..." "The rules are written by the winners." "That's not what I meant." "Oh, stop it!" "Agh!" " [crowd laughing]" " I don't know how he did this." "But you guys know I would never say anything bad about you." "You're all my friends, and I adore you." " [crowd booing]" " Hey, guys." "Guys!" "Listen!" "Hey, listen!" " [booing stops]" " This is high school, okay?" "No one really knows who they are yet." "And we're all still trying to figure things out." "I mean, you guys hated me like two minutes ago." "And I don't blame you." "Because I pretended to be something I wasn't so that you would like me, and I'm so sorry." "But take a look at yourselves for a second." "Is it any different for you?" "I mean, Caitlyn Crisp is no more Miss Perfect than I am a..." " Bloodsucker!" " Look, that's our water delivery guy." " Who are you?" " I am your arch nemesis." " Okay." " I'm Baron Von Awesome, a vampire hunter." " Dude, that's, uh, Stewart's uncle." "He still thinks you're a vampire." "He wants to kill you." " What?" "I think it's been pretty well established that I'm not an actual vampire." "I was getting way meaningful down here." " [evil laughing]" "It is not wise to ignore me, creature." "Especially when..." "I have your girlfriend." " Vi!" " [evil laughing]" " Where does that door go?" " Uh, the roof." "[♪♪]" " Come, demon, face your fate!" " What are you talking about?" "There's no way I could get up there." " Use your dragon wings." " This whole not really being a vampire thing just isn't sticking with you, is it?" " Uh, enough of your treachery, bloodsucker." "I am coming down." "[groaning]" " [crowd gasps]" " Bloodsucker!" " I told you, I'm not a vampire!" "[♪♪]" " At last!" "Ah!" "With such speed and agility, how can you claim to not be a vampire?" " You got me." " [laughs]" " I'm the real deal, and I'm real dangerous." "And right now, I'm real mad." "So I'd advise you not to challenge me." "Give up now." " Arm yourself!" " [crowd gasps]" " Okay." " Ah!" "Ah!" " Wait, wait, wait, wait!" "Uh... this is pointless, slayer." "You know that there's only one way to render a vampire powerless." " Of course." "A staring contest." " Exactly." "And I accept your challenge." "On the count of three." "One, two..." " Three!" " [crowd cheering]" " [crying]" " You fought bravely, human." " I see." "There's humanity, even in the undead." "I will spare your life." "I will spare his life!" " [crowd cheering]" " Uh, thanks." "Vi!" "I forgot Vi!" " Oh, move, out of the way!" " Go get her, Dracula!" " [crowd cheering]" "[♪♪]" " You just made the team." " Finally." " You're welcome." " So are you going to untie me now?" " Well, maybe." "But I'm thinking you're probably blaming me for all of this, and that you might actually hit me." " That's true." " [laughs]" " But I might also be grateful that you saved me and give you that kiss you've been looking for." " You don't need arms for that." " [crowd cheering]" " [laughing] [continued laughing]" " So cool." " I'm really sorry for everything that I said." " Yeah." " [indistinct chatter]" " Oh, oh, psychic." " So, we're like a couple now, huh?" " Yeah, don't get used to it." "You're not even my type." " How's that?" " Well, I'm more into werewolves." " BOTH: [laughing]" " Oh, by the way." "Thank you for the kaleidoscope." " You're welcome." "[♪♪]" "[♪♪]" " [crowd cheering]" " DAVIS:" "Oh, let me show you how to dance." " VI:" "Now this is my scene." "♪ Hold on tight" "♪ All aboard on this endless ride ♪" " DAVIS'S THOUGHTS:" "So maybe" "I'm not the coolest guy in the world, but who cares." "I made some friends, and I got the girl." "The right girl." "And they all seem to like the real Davis." "And you know what?" "That's pretty cool to me." "[♪♪]"