"Ruthie, Bethel is on the phone." "What's that smell?" "You know, Little Nicky's getting real good." "Chip off the old wood." "Honey, Bethel is on the phone because today is the last day for the finalists to turn in your favorite household hints, so that we can win the big prize and be on TV." "And the big prize is one of those darling Amana freezers, Nicky." "And I can't concentrate with Little Nicky banging away on those..." "Honey, but he's getting real good though, eh?" "Yeah." "You know, I didn't see my favorite shirt hanging up this morning." "Because there it is." "Where did this stain come from?" "Blood." "I didn't blood on my shirt." "Well, I did." "I bled all over it just so I could practice getting out the stain." "This is the third shirt you've ruined with Ruthie's household "hins."" ""Hints." Household "hints."" "What?" "Oh, never mind." "Bethel, here she is, the household "mence."" "Mence?" "!" "You know, like Dennis the "Mence."" "Oh." "Hello?" "Bethel?" "I..." "I can't hear you." "Nicky, please tell Little Nicky to stop." "Okay, okay, I'll go tell him to stop." "Thanks, honey." "Little Nicky, you have to stop now!" "Hi, Dad. I got it." "Yeah, right in the pocket, but you have to stop now 'cause your mother is on the phone." "Dad, can I sit in for one song with the band tonight?" "Oh, I don't know, Little Nicky." "Aw, can I, Dad?" "Gee, Dad, can I?" "You said I was sounding good." "Like Buddy Rich almost." "Well, I don't know, Little Nicky." "Well, okay, I'll talk to the rest of the guys in the band." "Oh, gee, Dad, will you?" "Really?" "Oh, wow!" "You know... I'll practice all day." "Listen to this." "Bethel, everything has to rhyme..." "Nicky." "Honey, the kid has to practice." "Listen to this, Dad." "No, no, no, you have to get behind the beat." "Behind..." "Behind the beat, behind the beat." "That's it." "Behind the beat, behind the beat, behind the beat." "That's it." "l can't find anything." "Yeah." "Behind the beat, behind the beat, behind the beat... I'm gonna have to call you back." "Quiet!" "I am just asking for one day of quiet." "Okay, okay, I'm sorry, honey." "But then you have to hurry up and finish up with the household hints business so that we can get back to life like normal around here, huh?" "Okay, honey." "Come on, Little Nicky, walk with me down to the train station, huh?" "Wait till you see how happy you are when I have that Amana freezer in the house." "We'll all sit in it and cool off." "And, Little Nicky, you come right back from that train station." "Yes, Mom." "Okay." "Oh..." "Whatever it is, we don't want it." "You've got roy-monia." "'Monia." "Need it." "What?" "Trade..." "Need 'monia." "Oh..." "Mister..." "Arter-bay." "I have the arter-things to bart-bay for ammonia." "You have ammonia, lady?" "Oh, yeah." "Come on in and sit down." "Ammonia." "l've got ammonia." "Ammonia." "Need-need ammonia." "Yeah, I got ammonia." "I use ammonia to take out carbon paper stains..." "Need ammonia." "...blood, grease-- the ten percent strength, being careful of silk and wool, of course." "Ew, this isn't wool, is it?" "No wonder you're fainting." "It must be a hundred degrees out there." "Foresby-breathe." "I eed..." "I need admonia." "Mister, I got a little lipstick on your suit." "I bet you need a glass of water." "O-nee, ne-watuper, no watuper." "Hey, what are you selling?" "Do you have anything to get out tobacco stains?" "All I have is ammonia." "'Monia. 'Monia." "But if you have something to get it out quicker and easier, I could win a Amana freezer." "Have many, many things in here." "Here, any many things for ady-trade for ammonia." "See?" "Here, have for opener, see?" "See?" "Opening, opening, opening." "Openings, openings." "Everything opening, opening." "Trade, lady, trade?" "You know, you don't sound so good." "And you look sick." "Maybe you should go home and rest for the day." "Let me get this lipstick stain out." "Let's see..." "Dear Harried Housewife," "Stubborn lipstick stain?" "Don't flip or kick." "Rub the stain with white bread." "Ah, brush away the crumbs Ta-da!" "Lipstick gone." "What a trick." "Aw, aw..." "How's about a... a ozer-kozer for ammonia, huh?" "See?" "Press, press." "See, see?" "Close." "Lipstick." "You know, if you really need ammonia that bad, I'm going to give you some." "'Monia?" "Have ammonia here?" "Oogy-googy, el-smell ammonia." "'Monia smell oogy-good." "I can smell 'monia at hundred miles." "Well, here it is." "Oogy-oogy, googy-good." "Ah." "Yes!" "Oh, no, no, don't drink that." "Oh, must drink, must." "Mmm..." "Oh, good golly!" "Oh, the antidote for swallowing ammonia is first you drink milk and then fruit juice." "Household hints, number ten:" "Drink this." "Don't drink that." "Good golly." "Oh, ervy-good." "Very, very oody-good-good." "You have more, lady?" "Are you all right?" "My name Klaatzu." "Not used to avity-gravity." "Your name is Klaatzu?" "Name Klaatzu." "You drank ammonia." "I did. I sure did." "I did, I drink ammonia." "I drink it." "And I have rader-traders in here for more." "I need three-year supply." "You're not from around here, are you?" "Oh, I stay here for three years." "And then, l-l watch and then I go home and I tell about you." "Rader-traders for more, lady?" "More ammonia?" "Mom!" "Mom!" "Dad said I could sit in tonight with the band, so I got to practice, okay?" "Oh, wait a minute, young man." "Mom, I got to practice." "Now we made a deal-- l get the morning, you get the afternoon." "But what if I don't get it right in the afternoon?" "I can't go back to the morning to practice before the afternoon, 'cause the morning will be gone." "But, honey, it's so hard to work when you're playing." "It's just a stupid household "hin."" "Hints!" "Household hints." "No one around here speaks English." "I'm gonna go practice now." "I'm sorry, mister." "Oh, it's kay-o, kay-o." "I got to go practice now." "Little Nicky...?" "And I must give you something for ammonia." "Oh, the only thing I need is to turn off Little Nicky for a couple hours." "Turn off Nicky?" "Just for a couple hours so I can get my work done." "Oh, yes, bio-stasis field." "We call it oper-stop." "Yeah, sure. that's what I need-- an oper-stop." "Mm-hmm." "Mister, if you've got something that will turn kids off for a couple hours, you can have all the ammonia in the house." "Ah, here is oper-stop." "Wow." "Hi, Mom!" "Wow!" "It works." "What do you think, Mom?" "Gene Krupa, eh?" "Oh, it sounds great, honey." "Oh, wow, I could win the household hints contest with this." "Do you have any more of these?" "Nicky, I'm home." "Ruthie?" "Ruthie?" "Hi, honey." "Look, all done." "Well, that's nice, honey, but I came home to pick up Little Nicky." "I thought he would be practicing." "Where is he?" "Here's your shirt." "Hey, what do you know-- no blood." "So these household "hins" are good for something." "Yeah." "Little Nicky!" "Oh, honey, he's been such a good little boy all day." "Let him play two numbers with the band tonight." "Why is he so quiet?" "Surprise." "What is wrong with him?" "Oh, he's just taking a little break." "He looks like a statue." "Hey, Little Nicky, that's a pretty good trick there." "That's a very difficult trick." "You see that?" "He don't blink." "Look, Nicky." "What's that?" "Well, it's an oper-stop." "It stops things." "Like you freeze." "And then you press this button here, see?" "And it stops the stop and everything goes back to normal." "Watch." "Oh!" "Oh, no." "Little Nicky?" "Very funny!" "What's going on here?" "!" "You know, I like jokes, Ruthie, but right now I don't feel like liking jokes." "Ooh, this can't be happening!" "Hey, Little Nicky, no more fooling around now!" "We have to go to the club, kid." "Little Nicky?" "What's wrong with him?" "Let me see that "thin."" "Oh..." "Who gave you this "thin"?" "Uh, Mr. Klaatzu." "It's an oper-stop." "Ave Maria... ?" "cuantas veces le he dicho a ella...?" "Klaatzu?" "Who the carajo is he?" "Oh, a very funny salesman." "Well, what was he doing here?" "!" "He needed ammonia." "Ammonia?" "!" "He drinks it." "Ruthie, this is no time for jokes." "I traded him ammonia for that!" "But you "ooper-stoop" our Little Nicky!" "How could you do such a "thin"?" "!" "Oper-stopped." "Well..." "I had to get blood out of your shirt and gum out of Little Nicky's hair so that I could win the freezer!" "Ay, chihuahua." "Oh, Nicky, what are we gonna do?" "!" "We are going to find this Mr. Klaatzu character and we are going to make him "unooper-stoop" our Little Nicky before I wring Mr. Klaatzu's neck." "Now where is he?" "I don't know!" "Little Nicky, way to go!" "Nicky?" "Ruthie!" "Ruthie!" "Did you fix it?" "Honey, I had him going." "Wait..." "Oh!" "Oh!" "Oh, stop it, Nicky!" "Oh, I can't stand it anymore." "Come and help me in the kitchen." "Oh!" "Caramba... I bought all the ammonia in the store." "Why so much?" "Well, Klaatzu said he can smell it from a hundred miles away." "It's what brought him here in the first place." "I thought it might bring him back." "Honey, this is what a flake must be." "Flake?" "You know, one of those weird "thins" that don't happen often." ""Fluke."" "Yeah!" "Well, I just hope this passing fluke is no flake, and that Little Nicky is not going to be a frozen statue in front of the drum set forever." "Oh..." "This stuff stinks." "Ugh!" "We don't want any." "Mel-smell 'moni-may." "Megadose." "Oh, smell 'monia." "Mighty googy-good." "Who are you?" "Ame-name Klaatzu." "!" "Sinvergùenza!" "You want art-bart?" "What?" "Arter-barter." "Barter." "You want trade?" "Ah, trade!" "Sure!" "We have ammonia for you." "All, all for you!" "See?" "You bring me back my Little Nicky, and-and, uh, you can take it all." "Ooh, I now have three years supply 'monia." "Well, take more." "You never know." "No, only need three years." "I go ome-home, where we do not have eavy-heavy gravity like Earth." "!" "Sinvergùenza!" "Who the hell are you?" "Please, please start him up again." "Easy to fix arter-start." "We have ammonia for you." "Honey, he don't want ammonia." "Well, what do you want?" "For three years to carry this." "Ammonia, 'monia..." "Mmm, smell oogy-good, oogy-good." "Nicey-nice I snay ammoni-nia." "He can't have my little baby." "Not for three years, not for one minute." "Tenemos que votar en este." "Morning." "Morning-zing." "Uh, we don't want our son to be oper-stopped the rest of his life." "We decided it's better for him to go with you for three years, if you promise he can come back." "Oh, three years no time in whole galaxy." "Well, if, uh, you will start him up, then we can say good-bye to him, and he can go with you." "Oh, oogy-googy-good." "Well, aren't you gonna have a little ammonia morning pick-me-up, Mr. Klaatzu?" "Oh, ery-very oogy-goog-good idea." "Morning-ing uppy-puppy." "Mmm!" "Moni-may!" "I'll never make fun of the way you talk again." "La-lee-loo-lee." "Oh, household hints, number ten:" "antidotes and poison!" "Honey, you do it." "Okay." "Little Nicky, I'll never ever tell you not to practice again." "Mommy and Daddy miss you so much." "Ah-ha!" "Oh, honey!" "Hey, Little Ricky, you sounding real good!" "Doing real good, son." "Hey, Little Nicky, stop!" "Stop it now!" "What's going on around here?" "Little Nicky?" "The hi-fi, she don't turn off." "Oh!" "Let me see that thing." "This button says "start."" "Well, that's what we wanted!" "We wanted to start him!" "But there's no stop button!" "There's no normal button!" "Don't tell me." "He's on permanent start!" "Little Nicky?" "Nicky?" "Little Nicky?" "Oh!" "Honey, he can't hear us!" "Now do you want to arter-barter?" "Trade?" "You remember to brush your teeth, sweetheart." "You don't want to get any more cavities." "I packed your blue sweater for when it's cold." "I'm so sorry, sweetheart." "I never meant to do anything to hurt you." "I love you so much, honey." "And you keep practicing to be good, huh?" "You know, behind the beat." "Behind the beat." "Be..." "And remember, you promised to bring him back to us." "Nicky?"