"Kyle.. "check the noob schoolbus, Jeremy".." "I don't wanna check it, it's a waste of my time Kyle.. same thing every time" "Could be playing games or something.." "Sup dude.. just wanna let you know that you ain't shit!" "I could own you any day at some game no one plays.." "Join my clan's server at some place I'm not gonna go.." "And we'll see who the *real* pwnerer is" "Oooh?" "What do you say about that?" "Well.." "Mr. Original" ".50 doorag 2pac wigga4life.. from L.A." "That's a big surprise.." "Hi wigga.." "You ... are a fag!" "Send.. there we go" "Dear Jeremy, I noticed that in the show you pronouce pwn as own.. but my friends and I say pone" "What gives!" "?" "Well Jeff J, I'll tell you what gives.." "Hi Jeff.." "You are a fag!" "Dear Jeremy.." "I think I like boys more than girls, but I'm afraid of  .." "I think I like boys more than girls!" "?" "But I'm afraid of people making fun of me if I express how I really feel.." "What should I do!" "?" "Oh Sean.." "Oh Sean D., of Vancouver B.C." "I'll tell you Sean.." "Dear Sean.." "You.." "Ooooh you.." "You see Sean, everyone is different.. y'know, and.." "As a gamer, I've experienced a lot of preju.. jizzes.. y'know?" "What really matters is that, y'know.. you stay true to who you are" "Basically, like anyone that makes fun of you for that.." "Is a.. total.. y'know.." "No wait, that's not what I'm trying to say.. that's coming out wrong" "Dear Sean.." "You.." "ARE.. a fag!" "To the noobschoolbus.." "I love the show.." "Jeremy and the rest, so funny.. especially Jeremy, he's the sexiest.." "I wanna have his babies.." "But man, Kyle.. ..." "You are the man?" "You don't get the credit you deserve.." "One day you'll be a famous Hollywood director" "Yeah,ifyoukeepfilmingme.." "Keep up the great work.." "Veronica sumthin'" "Ok, well, let's see.." "Hi Veron, you think Kyle's so great eh?" "Well.." "Lemme tell YOU something.." "Kyle still plays with He-man toys!" " Jeremy, it's for the show.." "I use them for work!" "Oh, I suppose you're doing the fighting sounds for fun?" " I use the figures to set up shots and lighting.." "Oh, so I guess maybe episode 11 we're going to Castle Greyskull?" "Or?" " Jeremy ..." "So am I Skeletor there?" "..." "Doug?" "Who's Doug?" "He's Beastman?" "* I have the power!" "bitches!" "*" "(translated by:" "Your Name)" "Episode 10:" "Teh best day ever" " Jeremy.." " Let's go, Jeremy.. time to get up!" "Chuck!" "Where are you Chuck?" "Kyle!" "Oh Kyle.." "I swear to God, Kyle.." " Jeremy time to get up, let's go!" "Kyle, what time is it?" " It's time to make the show!" " Jeremy, I've already booked the theatre.. people are already buying tickets" "That's not my problem Kyle.." " People are flying to Toronto to come and see the show and we haven't shot anything.. we have 2 weeks!" "You told me we'd make like 2 episodes.. now look at this, like.. waking me up again" "You think Brad Pitt has to put up with this?" " Ya, you're really Brad Pitt.." "Y'know obviously I pwn a bit more than Brad Pitt does.. don't wanna give him too much credit" "I'm just saying, like.. imagine I was Brad Pitt but also, like.. y'know.." "Smart, and funny, and good at games and stuff.." "Then, you think he'd put up with that?" "He'd fire you!" "I should.. fire you" " Jeremy what are you complaining about?" "I was sleeping Kyle!" " I know you were sleeping, but we have to make the show.." "Ok Kyle, when was the last time I went in your room and woke you up?" "When's the last time?" " When's the last time you got up before me?" "Well I mean.." "I just got up before you did tomorrow!" " Oh nice.. ya, that's great" "Y'know.." "like uhh.. welcome to my show" "This is episode, like.. whatever" "You might notice I'm in a new place" "'Cause me and Kyle, we moved out" "'Cause my Mom tried to come in with all this, kinda like.." ""Y'know you're not going to school, you just play games all day, so I'm gonna charge you rent"" "Thinking like.." "I'm gonna pay rent to live with my Mom, y'know?" "So obviously me and Kyle, like.. we went out and we found this place and I think it's great, y'know?" "I got.." "I got everything I need, right" "I've got my bed, so I'll like.. sleep on that and uhh.. y'know, I got my monitor and then Dave like, y'know.. he left his computer when he left, so.." "I figured he left it for me, so I took it.. and I'm using that" "Y'know it's pretty cool and stuff, like.." "We're learning how to, like.." "Eat.." "like uhh.." "Food that we made ourselves" "I may not be playing games, but.. it's like I'm totally pwning up this game called R-L, y'know.." "A-T-M, so.." "It's not like I'm totally bored" "Dave's computer is like.. pretty suck" "Like it can't actually play like.. y'know, any games or anything" "But it gives me an opportunity to read about stuff" "And to be honest that's OK right now, because.." "Y'know, I hate to say it.. but I think there's a serious problem with a lot of new games coming out" "In that they.. y'know.." "like they Suck" "Y'know, everyone's playing World of Warcraft.. and it seems like.." "Maybe other designers are playing World of Warcraft and they're not spending time designing their games properly maybe?" "Because.. it just seems like a bunch of crappity-crap like coming out at my face like all the time" "And you'd think, y'know.. you got millions of dollars, you got all these guys that are supposed to know so much about making a game.." "You'd think you'd be able to make a game that, y'know.. is like.." "like.." "Fun.." "And maybe.. put together properly, and y'know.. maybe have the basics, like.." "When you win, uhh, y'know.. you get counted as a win" "And when you lose.. maybe it's counted a lose" "Gaming, y'know.. it used to be all about the gameplay.. it used to be all about having fun and competing and stuff" "And now it seems to be, like.. it's all about fancy graphics" "Just kinda depressing, so I decided.." "Y'know.." "I'm gonna make my own game" "Because, I'm so pro.. and I know pretty much everything there is to know about games" "And so.." "I've just been kinda making this list of stuff" "Been writing that up, and.. kinda been writing emails to like a lot of game studios and stuff" "Saying "Hey, like.. why don't you make my game?" "'cause.. it's so good.." "like me.. and everyone will want to play it"" "But.. y'know.. they haven't written back like yet" "But that's OK.." "I'm expecting any day now I'll be making a game.." "And then that's what I'm gonna play, like.. my own game" " So what is your game gonna be called?" "It's gonna be called what it is, Kyle.." ""The only game on the shelf that doesn't lick my balls"" "I don't think this is how Dave used to make it, Kyle.." "Do you maybe wanna go get some New Gen or something, like?" "Not that this wouldn't taste good.." "I'm sure it would, but.." "Life's kinda funny sometimes, y'know.." "One day you're like super uber pro like me.." "And then the next day you wake up and you find out that you're like.. y'know.." "Even more awesome than like you were the day before, y'know?" "Got all these powers now and stuff.. can pretty much pwn anybody" "I could see how to an average man y'know, it'd pretty tough to kinda stay humble.." "Fortunately I'm also really smart, so.. it's not too tough for me" "Y'know like, don't get me wrong, like.." "You wanna be a pro, right.. but like.." "Sometimes you can be like too pro for your own good" "You don't wanna be like all pro up in people's faces, right.." "'Cause sometimes, y'know.. you're gonna start thinking that.." "You're probably better than you actually are" "And when that happens you're gonna start to lose focus, right.." "Next thing you know, you're losing to a n00b" " Jeremy.. hang on a second" " Can we take a break here?" "This camera is kinda heavy.." "What do you mean?" "Kyle, I'm hungry Kyle.." " Well my arm hurts!" " You wanna carry this?" "Oh!" "Kyle's complaining about his new camera!" "The big fancy camera he's got on his shoulder right now.." "That Mom bought him 'cause he got a couple good grades in school!" "How fair is that?" " Well I was the top of the class.." "I'm the top of how many ladders Kyle?" "What do I get?" "I get nothing!" "I get a loaner computer from the Masterer.." "And he takes it back!" "Mom takes my computer away Kyle!" "Oh you're top of your class, Kyle.. give me a break" "OMG Kyle!" "Kyle.. the whole world is against me, Kyle" " Well let's go to Maggie's?" "Ya!" "Let's go to Maggie's.." "Uhh.." "Kyle I only got like.." "like 5 bucks" " Well the meal costs 7.." "Ya but, like I mean.. maybe you could.." "like maybe.." " Maybe you could get a job and stick with it" "Kyle.. c'mon.. y'know.. jobs and me.." "It's kinda like oil and liquid, right?" "They don't really mix very good" " Ya, I agree.. if you can't hold down a job as a game tester, I honestly don't know what kinda job you're gonna be able to get" "Kyle, that was not like they advertised it at all.." "like seriously, that was not my fault.." "like really" "Take your pony to the next water station.." "Brush her hair.." "Your pony died 'cause it wasn't pretty enough.." "AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" " Well what about those other jobs?" "Weren't you working for some phone company or something?" "Ya.. for like.. y'know.." "A little bit" "Hello?" "Ya, ya.. for sure" "Ya.." "Ok, you're gonna wanna open up your control panel" "Your control panel.." "You don't know what your control panel is?" "I see.." "Ya, no I'm still here.." "I'm just thinking about how much of a n00b you are" "I appreciate that Kyle.." " Ya, ya, ya.." "I gotta figure out what to do about money, Kyle.. 'cause like.." "This whole "job" thing isn't really working out for me, y'know like.." "I mean lots of people write the show all the time, and they're like " ""Hey let's hang out and stuff, you look so cool.. we'd be best friends"" "So maybe, like.. maybe I should charge for that?" "You think?" "  You think someone's gonna pay money to hang out with you?" " You know what?" "Someone did write the show a couple months ago asking for some of your hair.." "Really?" "That's kinda creepy.." " Y'know, we could sell that on Ebay.." " Let's make an Ebay auction.. some crazy fan will buy a lock of your hair for like 400 bucks or something 400 bucks?" "For my hair Kyle?" "Kyle I grow that stuff back for free!" "I got hair everywhere!" "Kyle, that's genius" "Kyle.. it's like.. it's just like the auction house but like in R-L!" "OMG Kyle.." "I'm gonna sell so much stuff" "I'm gonna sell my hair.." "I'm gonna sell like.. my nails and stuff.." "I'm gonna sell my toothbrush!" " Well what are you going to use to brush your teeth?" "Kyle, we're not living with mom anymore.." "Oh Kyle.. we're gonna be so rich.. we're gonna be so rich!" "Hey man!" "Hey what's up Doug.." "Not much how's it going?" "Not too bad, me and Ky" "Check it out!" "Brought the Cube, man!" "Wanna play?" "Let's go play!" "Dude!" "This is a sweet room!" "Ya, it's not so bad I guess.." "Man.." "living on your own?" "PWNS!" "It's pretty cool, I got what a need" "Think about it!" "No parents bugging ya!" "You don't have to worry about Mom coming in and like.. busting ya playing vids, or.." "Think about all the times you can bring home, like.. new games and shit!" "It's pretty cool.." "Man, I got an idea!" "Let's have a party!" "Invite all your friends over!" "You got a.. you got a balcony man?" "!" "Ya, it's" "OMG!" "Oh man.." "I could spend all day out here!" "Dude check it out!" "Check it out!" "Holy shit!" "This is great, man!" "Don't you think?" "Ya, it's pretty cool.." "So.." "Have you talked to her yet?" "So you brought Mario Kart?" "Man you're right, Kyle, like.. he's not himself, is he?" "OMG!" "Dude, aren't you gonna like.. hump my head or something?" "That was fucking unbelievable!" "You bastard!" "How do you get away?" "How do you get away?" "Sometimes I don't even know, Doug.." "Oooooohhh!" "YEAH!" "That's what I'm talking about!" "Who's got the balls?" "I've got some balls!" "The big big big da balls!" "The balls!" "Who's got the balls?" "I've got the balls!" "The big big big da balls!" "The balls!" "He's got big motherfucking balls!" "My balls.. need sucking!" "My balls.. need some licking!" "My balls.. my balls.. my bal" "I knocked before I came in.." "Doug, maybe we should go make some toast or something.." "Dude, screw the toast.. this is really awkward" "Hi.." "Hey.." "Dude,yougonnafilmthis ?" "Ya,shit..hangon" "Shh..quiet" "Look I know you're really upset with me right now.. but I need to talk to you" "He was just somebody that I met at my cousin's wedding.. the guy that you saw me with.." "And he asked me out for dinner and I said yes.." "Maybe I shouldn't have said yes.. but it was just dinner.." "I mean it wasn't anything special" "It wasn't like the Westfall Stew Picnic we had at the Molsen Farm.." "Ya, ya.." "I know what kinda guys I guess you like to hang out with now.." "I guess I learned something" "I didnt say I liked hanging out with him.." "No, you're just gonna group with him then.." "I guess you probably group with lots of guys, y'know.." "Maybe that's common with WoW players huh?" "You like to group with lots of guys?" "Is that what you do?" "Look.." "I can hang out with whoever I want to, whenever I want to.." "Ok?" "I just.. sometimes it's nice to go out, y'know?" "Like you don't wanna do anything in RL.." "I told you!" "Bring your PC over if you want to go out!" "No!" "Out on a date!" "How do you expect to have a girlfriend if you never take her out on dates?" "I don't need to go out on dates!" "I'm famous now.." "I get girls writing me all the time!" "Do you know how many girls would love to bring their PCs over here?" "O RLY?" "YA RLY!" "Well why don't you just go group with some fan girl!" "Maybe I will!" "Maybe I'll group with a whole bunch of fans!" "Ya, I'm sure you're gonna get a really meaningful relationship from one of those girls, huh?" "Well.. better than this!" "I get lots of emails from guys too, and y'know what?" "Maybe I'm gonna go reply to them!" "And start having relationships with them too!" "Ya, y'know what?" "Maybe you should!" "Y'know I got four words for you:" "G-T-F-O" "Oh my G-!" "You're filming this?" "Why don't you just put this on your internet TV show too?" "OMG!" ""I'm always me, but you're not you"" ""Do my words have meaning to you?"" ""Now that you're gone, it's all gone"" ""Everyone's gone.."" ""We used to be.. so strong"" ""Get outta myspace.."" ""We used to be.. so strong"" ""Now the world's wrong, now the world's gone wrong.."" ""Turn all the lights off on the world, you don't care about society's feelings do you?"" ""Choices you make.. are all wrong"" ""Who will be on my side?"" ""We used to be.. so strong"" ""Get outta myspace.."" ""We used to be.. so strong"" ""But now the world's wrong!" "Now the world's gone wrong!"" ""Wrrrrrooooonnnggg!"" ""Everyone is fake.." "Everyone is fake.."" ""Everyone is fake.." "Everyone is fake.."" " Whoa.." "Jeremy, you're up?" "Hey Kyle.." " What are you doing?" "Just thinking about stuff, y'know?" "Can't really sleep with so much pain" " What, did you hurt yourself?" "No, Kyle.. just, y'know.. society, like.." "The whole world's in so much pain, y'know" " What are you looking at?" "Just society.." "How it's trying to societize me and stuff" "Just not fair sometimes I think, y'know.." " What's not fair about living in a society?" " You pay your taxes, you have roads to drive on, you have police and fire protection.." " What's wrong with living with other people?" "Living in a civilization?" "I wouldn't expect you to understand, Kyle.. you're a part of it, y'know" " Well, so are you" "I think that's what hurts so much.." " All you do is play games all day, I don't see why you're in pain?" " I don't see why you have anything to complain about?" "You don't understand, Kyle.." "Society doesn't understand.." "You're too busy societizing me and everybody else.." "You don't even stop to think about how you've societized yourself" " Well, we have to finish the show today.. so, let's go.. we've got some filming to do" "I'm not gonna do the show anymore, Kyle.." " What?" "I'm not, uhh.." " What do you mean, we have to finish this episode at least!" "That's pain, Kyle.." "Now maybe you feel what the world feels every day.." " Jeremy, Ok.." "Jeremy.." " Come over here.." "let's go over here" " Jeremy read this right now, Ok?" "What're you making me read now?" " It's an email we got today" ""An email we got today".. we get email every day" "Dear Jeremy.." "I love the show and I'm a huge fan" "I watch all the eps over and over" "You really pwn" "Kyle pwns too, but not as much as you" "I want to thank you for helping me, today was the best day of my life" "I'm small, 5'0".." "I'm in grade 10 and I get picked on a lot" "There's this one guy, Ryan, who pushes me around all the time" "Well yesterday, because of you I finally stood up to him" "He came up to my locker in front of everyone and made fun of my pants" "I told him he reminds me of ghey" "Everyone laughed" "And then I called him a n00b and he got really mad" "Turns out he knows what a n00b is" "So I challenged him, right there" "One by one went through all our PSP games" "I totally pwned him, with everyone watching" "Today, he was talking to me about it.. everyone was" "Even girls, Jeremy.." "Turns out they don't care if a guy plays games" "They only care that he pwns" "One girl even kissed me, Jeremy.." "So that's why I'm writing" "Thank you so much" "You've changed my life" "And I know I'm not the only one" "Please don't ever stop making the show" " We get emails like this every day" " Jeremy where are you going?" "Jeremy?" " Jeremy!" " Where are you going?" "I pwn n00bs, Kyle.." " Whose place is this?" "Look, my guild's in Blackwing Lair right n" "I'm tanking Nef, I gotta get back to" "Just let 'em wipe" ""Isaidyouremindmeof ghey"" ""Everything's Ok now"" ""'Cause I'm with you"" ""The Masterer showed me the way"" ""To pwn at games"" ""And I can show you, too"" " JEREMY!" "Hey n00bs, like.. welcome to behind the scenes at Pure Pwnage" "Lots of n00bs write the show still and they're like " ""Hey like we wanna see more behind the scenes like.."" ""We wanna see how the show keeps getting even more awesome and stuff"" ""And how you guys are doing it"" "And a big part of the way we're doing it is that we have the Noob Store, right.." "Which is a way that we kinda make some money from the show to buy stuff" "Like our new light over here" "I'll introduce to the new light.." "This is our new light here that we use in the show" "And uhh.. we named him.." "We named him Dave" "'Cause it's kinda who he ended up replacing" "In terms of his job" "And then here we have the store" "Doug wraps the shirts for us" "I kinda get the orders ready" "So I thought we'd kinda give you an idea of the process that's involved" "So for example, I'll come over here to the pile" "This is all the orders that came in" "And we'll take this guy's.. this is, uhh.." "This is Ja-ro-nee Why-mar of the Neanderthal-land" "Kyle you could've picked a better one!" "For God's sake.." "Hey.. can you pass me a Boom Headshot one?" "Wh-what kinda shirt do you want me to pass you, Doug?" "The blue one.." "Wh-what kinda shirt is that Doug?" "Come on, Doug, just say it one more time.. you said it so quiet" "Fuck off!" "Give me the shirt" "So anyways we go into the box.." "And then we'll pull out, uhh.." "Jaronee's order.." "And then basically, y'know.." "I just kinda.." "Give it a good rub.." " What the hell are you doing?" "I'm increasing the value of the shirts, Kyle.." " What!" "?" "By sticking it down your pants?" "Ya, I rub all the shirts on my balls.." " You rub all the shirts on your balls!" "?" "Come on, Kyle.. as if people aren't gonna love that!" " How long have you been doing that?" "Since ever, Kyle.." "I told you!" "I mean I told you the first day, Kyle!" " I thought you were joking" "Why would I joke about that?" "I thought it was your suggestion.." "Anyways, so this is Jaromee's shirt here.. uhhh.." "And then we kinda put it here and I just kinda pass it off to Doug.." "So ya, so that's like the Noob Store, pretty much.." "I mean, uhh.." "Y'know it's a business, and.." "Y'know.. it keeps me fed, I guess" "Thanks for watching the show, and uhh.." "Buy some shirts, y'know.."