"Come on, uncle phil." "Vogue." "Express yourself" "Oh, yeah." "Oh, no." "will, sweetie, you've been snapping everything in sight for days." "Now, what's going on?" "It's a photography assignment, Aunt Viv." "I wanted to do something meaningful and artistic... but ain't nobody getting naked." "Morning, all." "carlton, the photography assignment is due today." "You haven't snapped a single picture yet." "Not to worry." "carlton, this is a photography assignment." "Not a Prince video." "Madam, sir, there is a most perturbing person out here... who claims to be an old friend of yours." "Who is it, Geoffrey?" "She didn't say." "She was too busy calling me a pathetic servant of the capitalist fat cats." "Marge." "Marge." "You look so good, girl, give me a hug!" "Look at you." "Woman, the Iast time I saw you was that anti-war rally in '71 ." "You stole my Afro comb." "Don't look like you be needing it now." "Hi, I'm carlton." "Hi, carlton." "Hey, how you doing?" "I'm will." "My God, you look just like my old boyfriend, EI." "I take it EI was blindingly handsome." "Who's EI?" "EIdridge CIeaver." "Was he related to wally and the Beav?" "hold it." "You knew EIdridge CIeaver?" "We were all in the movement together." "Me, EI, OIifami, and AdisimboI." "Wait, hold up." "OIifami and AdisimboI, too?" "Man, that's unbelievable." "Who the hell are they?" "phil is OIifami and Vivian is AdisimboI." "Okay, and I'm "About To Bust A Gut-a."" "Boy, you two have come a Iong way from that fifth floor... waIk-up you had when OIifami and I were in law school." "Boy, those were the days." "We marched on Washington, staged sit-ins, held hunger strikes." "would that have been between breakfast and lunch, or lunch and dinner?" "But we knew how to par-tay, too." "Did we ever." "Remember Woodstock?" "Yes." "20 of us tried to squeeze into that tent." "Vivian and I jumped into that lake naked." "I wasn't at Woodstock." "Yeah." "Kids, did I tell you that Marge and I went to school together?" "That she graduated near the top of our law school class?" "So, Marge, are you with a firm or on your own?" "On my own." "I'm still in the struggle." "That's dope, Marge." "You never gave up on what you believed in." "I do my best." "Hey, check it out." "Look right into the camera and say "Burn, baby, burn."" "No, you can't take my picture." "I mean, just wait for me to freshen up a little." "But speaking of pictures, look at what I have here." "Oh, no." "Come on." "Look at this." "Oh, my God." "Who are those two weirdoes... and who is that ugly little kid in the dashiki diaper?" "Those two weirdoes are your father and I, and that ugly little kid is you." "The bone in your hair is a good look for you, hilary." "Yeah, you've got sort of a "yabba-dabba do."" "Mom, look at how short your skirt is." "Your mother's legs made the miniskirt famous." "I have Mom's legs." "Can I wear my skirt that short?" "You have my legs, and the answer is no." "Marge, girl, you must be tired after your trip." "Now, you're staying with us." "And I don't want to hear any arguments." "You aren't getting any." "Just tell me where to plug in my eight-track." "Geoffrey will take your bags up to the guest room." "I carry my own bag." "My brother, you have been oppressed, repressed, and suppressed by capitalism." "Don't you know you can be free?" "I have known freedom, don't like the health plan." "Geoffrey is not oppressed." "He's more our friend." "Aren't you, Geoff?" "Whatever you say, phil." "So you can see how AnseI Adams created a work of genius... just by using light and shadow." "Which brings me to your work, geniuses." "AII right." "Let's see those homework assignments." "I Iike that." "will, that wouldn't happen to be gum in your mouth, would it?" "Yes, Mr. Knotts." "cool, do you have any more?" "Thanks." "That's good." "carlton, this is...." "It's a very, it's...." "What the hell is it?" "Our assignment, sir." "You asked us to experiment with shadow." "I call this Bunny on a Wall." "And I'm gonna call this Midget at a Desk." "Everybody, before you go, there's something I'd Iike you to remember." "I think that there is something very special about every single one of you." "class dismissed." "Wait, hold up." "What about our trip to the MappIethorpe exhibit?" "Don't you want our permission slips?" "Mine ain't forged this time." "Hey, come on, CornfIake, where's your permission slip?" "Are you kidding?" "My parents won't let me look at naked photos." "They thought The Little Mermaid was pornographic." "Turned me on." "I can't go see the MappIethorpe exhibit either." "actually, none of us is going." "It seems that a Iot of your parents just don't approve of this exhibit... and since going was my bright idea..." "I've been fired." "What?" "No." "What?" "hold up, they can't do that." "This is an outrage!" "They can't give us a new teacher now." "I mean, I've spent the whole semester sucking up to you." "Hey, Marge." "Hey." "I still can't believe they fired the best teacher that BeI-Air Prep ever had." "You know, you been talking about this for the past two days." "Move on it." "You know what MaIcoIm said:" ""By any means necessary."" "Yeah, you know, Marge, you're right." "I'm gonna move on it." "Good." "I Iike having you around." "You get me all hyped and everything." "I bet that's how you felt when you roomed with angela Davis, right?" "Yeah." "But we had a Iot of huge arguments." "Word?" "What?" "About her political views?" "No, about how she used to always put her name on everything in the refrigerator." "Got on my nerves." "Yeah, and I bet with that big old Afro, she probably had a Iot of hair... and Afro Sheen and stuff all over the place, right?" "Boy, don't get me started." "You know what?" "I'm gonna call you Hasani." "What, you just gonna dis me right in my face like that, Marge?" "No, it's SwahiIi." "It means "handsome."" "I Iike how you talk, Marge." "I Iike how you think, too." "Hey, you know what?" "I got a name for you, too." "It's just "Too Legit To Quit."" "Hey, that's pretty clever." "Did you just think of that?" "Yeah, why?" "You like it?" "Your Perrier, my sister." "Hey, Marge, listen." "We just got tickets to the Roberta FIack concert tonight." "Come on, we'II grab a bite to eat first." "No, I don't feel like going out tonight." "Come on, you haven't been anyplace since you've been here." "No." "I mean, we'II make it another time, okay?" "Greetings, Sister AdisimboI." "Greetings, Brother OIifami." "Power to the people!" "Ash, you kind of look like Winnie the Pooh MandeIa." "Mom, Daddy, I am a depressed minority... and I want my allowance increased." "No." "Then I'm staging a sit-in and I won't eat my peas." "You will eat your peas." "Come on, Daddy." "Suppose Gandhi's parents treated him like this." "Gandhi ate his peas." "Then I shall spray paint my demands on the pool house wall." "We like to encourage free speech." "We certainly do." "ashley!" "girl, are you crazy?" "Get your butt back here!" "You're on the mike, what's your beef?" "No, sir, he just stepped out." "Yeah." "Sure, I'II tell him." "AII right." "That was the FBI looking for uncle phil." "I wonder what they want." "They want me." "Look I guess I better just flat out say this." "The FBI wants me." "What?" "The FBI?" "really?" "could you put in a good word for me?" "I'm thinking of applying." "She means they're after her, carlton." "She's a fugitive." "We're harboring a fugitive?" "Look, no offense, Marge, but I'm not going to prison over this." "No way am I sharing a cell with a woman called Big Mama." "Marge, I don't understand." "What do they want you for?" "Take your pick." "I helped a bunch of migrant workers bust out of an internment camp... broke into some federal buildings, shredded a few files... made life pretty damn difficult for the South African Embassy back East." "Man, and I thought I was doing my part by going to Spike Lee movies." "Does the government know where you are?" "They probably know I'm in the area and they're checking out everybody I know." "No, it's cool, Marge." "We're gonna stand right behind you." "Right?" "Marge, you know we love you, but we've got a family to think about." "Why don't you give us some time to think this over?" "I understand." "Marge." "We're behind you 200%." "Peace." "Operator, get me the FBI." "carlton, what are you doing, man?" "Come on, will." "We're harboring a fugitive." "She's not a fugitive, she's our friend." "Yeah." "And ever since she got here my diary has been a Iot more interesting." "well, I agree, ashley's diary is a Iot more interesting." "But it's not worth going to jail over." "Okay, that is enough, carlton." "Your mother and I will handle this." "I hate to sound paranoid... but do we really know if Mom and Dad are who they say they are?" "Or if their names are really Mom and Dad?" "gentlemen, we all agree that Mr. Knotts' dismissal is wrong... but we have the rights to redress our grievances... which is why I urge you to sign this petition." "Sometimes a man has to be willing to put his name on the line... for what he believes in." ""Ricky Ricardo"?" ""Lucy, you got some explaining to do."" "Hey, look, fellas." "There ain't no point in trying to reason with The Man... when The Man is not trying to reason with you." "Right on." "What we gotta do is get up in his grill..." "and show him that we got the power." "Yes!" "Power to the people." "Say it loud." "I'm black and I'm proud!" "AII right." "My man CornfIake got the spirit." "He's a little confused, but he's got the spirit." "Hey, look, what we got to do is take over this classroom." "We gotta nail that door shut, and we gotta chain ourselves together... to show them that we mean business, each and every one of us." "Now y'aII with me?" "will, I think I speak for all of us when I say..." "let's get the hell out of here." "Don't worry, will." "They'II never take us alive." "Hey, calm down, man." "I already bought my suit for the prom." "Hey, look, what we gotta do is nail that door shut." "I'II call the handyman." "Come on, man, we're radicals." "We gotta do things for ourself." "You're right, my brother." "Where are the safety goggles?" "Man, my butler forgot to pack them." "Here, here you go." "Here, man, it's easy." "It's like this." "Yo, you all right, man?" "Yeah, I'm just hyperventiIating." "This is so exciting." "We're like The Mod Squad, without julie." "well, this ought to show them we mean business." "Yeah." "will?" "Yo?" "What do we do now?" "We chant." "Attica !" "Man, you smell that?" "Damn, it's chimichanga day in the cafeteria." "Yo, Marge, you should have seen me." "It was dope." "Me and my man CornfIake barricaded ourseIf in Mr. Knotts' classroom, right?" "It took the whole football team to break down the door... and when they came in, we was chanting, "Make love, not war."" "Right on, Hasani, but why were you chanting "Make love, not war?"" "We was kind of hoping the cheerleaders would overhear." "Sweetheart, this is not a joke." "Now, your antics got you suspended for three days." "Now go to your room." "Looks like I've had quite an impact on your kids." "You're proud of getting a high school kid suspended?" "If you mean, am I proud to have told him... to do anything you have to for what you believe in... then, yes, I am." "Marge, when you talked to will about when we chained ourselves together... at sit-ins, you're only giving him the romantic part of the struggle." "girlfriend, you are leaving out everything that went before it." "The leaflets, the petitions, the years of trying to work through the system." "If the system doesn't work, you have to blow the door down." "Looks like you forgot that." "You talk as if I wasn't there with you in Birmingham facing dogs and fire hoses." "This is me, OIifami." "The same OIifami that was with you the night HarIem went up in flames." "But now I have a family and I choose not to fight in the streets." "I have an office to fight from... and I have fought and won cases for fair housing, affirmative action... health care and I am not ashamed to write a big fat check for something I believe in... and that doesn't make me any less committed than you." "So don't you dare look down your damn nose at me, AdiboIa." "I guess I've overstayed my welcome." "Marge... you are welcome to stay here until you can figure out where you want to go." "But if you ever want to stop running..." "Viv and I will be here for you." "Marge." "Where uncle OIifami?" "He's in the study with AdisimboI." "Oh, yeah, good thing he ain't in here." "Because if he was I might just have to run back up to my room." "What you doing?" "Now that The Man's after me, I think it's best for me to split." "Yeah, well, you know, you got to get back to your work." "Yeah." "Hey, I heard that there was an anti-apartheid rally in D.C." "Yeah, I may swing by." "I knew you'd understand, will." "AII right." "So I'II be ready in about 10 minutes." "For what?" "Yo, I'm gonna go with you." "Man, if we gonna be underground, though, I'II probably need another name." "How about, Akbar Shabash Jenkins?" "will, you're a kid." "You belong at home." "You're only 17." "By the time you were 17, you burned your first bra." "Baby, you can't do what I did." "But I couId go get one of hilary's." "What I mean is, you have to find your own way, will." "You know, when I was your age there weren't many doors open to us." "Some of them we had to blow open, and because we did... you've got more opportunities." "Don't get me wrong." "I am not saying that things are perfect." "It's just that now you can fight our battles in the boardrooms, too." "And in the classrooms, the voting booths, and the courtroom." "Just like your uncle." "AII right, hold it." "I thought you said "by any means necessary."" "Right, but it's up to you to figure out what's necessary." "And, will, when the courtroom doesn't work, come find me." "You're a deep sister, AdiboIa." "And you are the future, Hasani." "Agent Marcus collins of the FBI." "If you need me, I'II be upstairs saIuting the flag." "philip Banks, my wife, Vivian." "hello." "How do you do?" "I understand you're acquainted with a woman named Margaret SmaIIwood?" "I have reason to believe she's been in contact with you, Mr. Banks." "really?" "What would that reason be?" "We tap every black person's phone in the United States of America." "Just a little FBI humor." "But seriously, folks, harboring a fugitive can have grave repercussions." "Marjorie SmaIIwood is a very close personal friend of mine." "I consider myself privileged to know her." "She was here, but she left some time this afternoon." "Do you have any idea where she was headed?" "As a matter of fact, she said she was going to a nuclear power plant in Texas." "But then again, she did mention a migrant workers' camp in salinas." "No, honey, she said she was going to a voters' registration drive in biloxi." "well, I thought she was just going to Saks." "Get the heck out of here." "You all mean she ain't in the bathroom?" "I must say, I'm disappointed in you, Mr. Banks." "I would have thought a man in your position would be more aware... of his responsibilities." "I know exactly what my responsibilities are." "Son, would you show Agent collins to the door?" "By the way, I don't think we've met." "Ricky Ricardo." "Yo, HiI, check out my horoscope." ""You will become a famous rapper with your own TV show." That's dope, right?" "Those things are ridiculous." "What does mine say?" "It says, "You are headed for a fall." "Beware." "Accidents can happen."" "Those things are so stupid." "I wonder what I'II call my TV show?" "english"