"THE SPECTATOR Cinema Journal Year 1953" " N.1" "This issue's theme is LOVE in THE city" "CONTENTS" "Three Hours Of Paradise" "REPORT:" "Attempted Suicide" "Paid Love" "Marriage Agency" "Caterina's Story Italians Stare" "The city is made of stone, steel and people." "Two million people living and working, adoring and annoying one another, each in their own way and each with their own fortune." "This journal, a product of camera and film rather than pen and ink, is dedicated to love in a great city." "Not the love so often seen on this same screen, portrayed by macho men like Kirk Douglas and alluring women like Marilyn Monroe - a lustrous love, revised, retouched and re-scripted to make you quiver with passion." "The characters in our journal are not cinema actors, but real-life city dwellers." "We have chosen the actual people who experienced the events represented." "They each have their own dreams, thoughts and concerns, with someone waiting for them every day." "Love has three elements:" "Anticipation, encounter and farewell." "Have you ever heard what people say to each other?" "What they say in all in sincerity when they think they're alone?" "Piazza del Popolo, Rome, 5pm" " Shall we go to the movies?" " No..." "We need to talk." "What is it?" " What is it?" " l'm pregnant." " Pregnant?" "You're sure?" " Yes." "19 Trasimeno Street, 7:30pm" "Have you had many girlfriends before me?" " A few." " So I'm just one of many." "It's different with you." "Trinita dei Monti Church, 3pm" " How can I be sure you'll always love me?" " l swear I will." "How can I be sure you'll still love me in ten years' time, in 1963?" "I want a man who can give me that security." "I can do that." "Who else could know it better than I?" "I know myself. ln 1963, in '73..." "I can't live without you." "No doubt about it, but if you don't believe me, let's end it." " No, I believe you." "Swear it again." " l swear." "Gasworks, 12:10pm" "We've been married for a year and still no kids." " Darling, it's not the right time." " Why not?" " We both work." " We've only been married one year." " We'll get a loan." " l don't want any debts." "And I don't want to listen to a screaming kid when I'm old." "If I'm young I'll have fun when he's little, and when he grows up, I can take him to work with me." "It'll be one year tomorrow," "March 28th. it was five o'clock." "Right, yeah..." "These are your letters." "They're all there." "These are yours." " l'd also like my cigarette case." " l don't have it." "Not because it's valuable." "But if we're no longer together..." "You got your ring back." "Lungotevere Sanzio, 4.30pm" " Stop, it's late." " Just one more?" "One more." " You went with him, I know!" " No!" "They told me!" "Andrea doesn't understand me." "But you do." "Yes, I do." "Love is about sincerity, spontaneity..." "Go open the door." "I'll go myself then." "So?" "Let's go now." "Let's go there." "We'll be alone." "The landlady's out till midnight." "No, let me see the end of the film." "What's wrong with you?" "Calm down." " Darling..." " Have you gone mad?" "Of course not." "REPORT" "Certain issues come up frequently in the papers, to which even the boldest journalists offer largely vague and generic solutions." "I'm referring to the sex trade and to suicide." "We went to film the women on the street." "We spoke to some men and women who had attempted suicide and were snatched from death by a merciful twist of fate." "So, all the characters in this report are real..." "paid LOVE" "..and will tell their own stories in their own words." "At night, in the dimly lit streets of the outskirts, we find those who must avoid public places to conceal their degenerate situation or to better avoid the long arm of the law." "The station and the nearby streets are their other hunting grounds." "For, after nine, the number of travellers increases who, being so far from home, feel compelled to seek a quick fling." "Only the boldest and most experienced walk through the centre." "Here, raids are more frequent, but so too are the more fortunate encounters." "is it possible to shed light on the emotional lives hidden behind the professional front?" "is it possible to overcome the contempt and indifference or base desire that separates them from us?" "We interviewed some of them." "The first one we spoke to was Jolanda." " Could I ask your name?" " Jolanda." " How old are you?" " 32." " Would you like to change your life?" " You think that's easy?" "You tell me." " Do you live alone, miss?" " With my mum and my two brothers." " What do they do?" " They're unemployed." " Since when?" " A long time ago." "It's not always easy to spot them right away." "Valli looks like she's been out for the night and is just hurrying home." "Valli is one of the oldest ones, her sad career is almost over and she has no savings." "So she wanders around all night, looking for clients, often in vain." "Her colleagues call her "the wanderer"." "Valli, may I ask you a question?" "We know you walk a lot." "How many shoes do you get through every year?" " About twenty." " Twenty pairs of shoes?" " They fall apart." " Do they get worn through walking?" " Yes." " Do you prefer open or closed shoes?" " Closed shoes." " Closed?" " They're not elegant, but..." " They're warmer, right?" "Yes, especially now." "Do you suffer from the cold or do you not feel it?" "I don't feel it." "How many hours rest or sleep do you get every night?" "Not a lot, three hours..." "Four at the most." "Around midnight, the morality-crime unit increases its patrols." "Families leave the cinemas and this disgrace must remain hidden." "Women like Jolanda and Valli can be found in certain bars, where they are regulars." "These places, offering protection and shelter, are a haven for those individuals who could be described as "friends"" "or, ironically, "protectors"." "In this bar, we interviewed one of the youngest girls..." "May I?" "..the one drinking coffee." " What's your name?" " Tilde." " How many coffees do you drink?" " About ten." " Do you like coffee?" " Sure, but..." " Maybe it's not good for you." " Yes, it gives me the shakes." "How long are you allowed to stay in this bar?" "As long as we want." "If it gets busy, we have to go." "Otherwise we can stay till we please." "Tilde." " Who's he?" "Do you know him?" " Yes, I met him earlier." " What did he want?" " He wants me to work in a variety show." " Would you like that?" " Why not?" " lf it's well paid..." " You need a lot of money?" " Quite a lot." " Someone depends on you?" " l have a child." " Oh, a child." "Are you married?" "No..." "I'm not." "Did he walk out on you?" "Yes, but I kept the baby." "I was very young and lonely." "Does he live with you?" "I wish!" "He's with his nanny." " Do you have parents?" " No." " Did they die?" " Yes." " How old were you?" " Five." " Did you have anyone else?" " Yes." "I went to live with my godmother, but eventually I left." " Wasn't she nice to you?" " She meant well, but she wasn't my mum." "It's gone one o'clock, it's safe to wander around now." "But the streets are deserted and often an obvious proposal provokes cruelly ironic comments." "Get to bed!" "The most difficult hours of the night begin." "The last lights go out." "It's half past two." "This woman is called Anna." "Anna, how long have you been on your feet?" " Five or six hours." " How long will you stay out?" "I'll wait for a few more trains to arrive, till the nightclubs close, around three, half past three." "How long do you think you will do this for?" "Until I find someone to settle down with." "Where do you live?" "Can we come to your house?" "You may as well, I'm done for the night." "This is my room, this is a guesthouse." "There's a clerk, two students and me." " Do they know what you do?" " l don't even know them." " l never see them." " Do you have a boyfriend?" "He left me a month ago." "This is all I have left now." "I'll show you." "Two souvenirs." "A receipt for a coffee we drank together and two tram tickets." "There." "Three years." "He was with me for three years, then he ran off with my savings." " Can't you report him to the police?" " l'm scared and I still love him." "I had some savings and now I have to start from scratch." " You don't have anything left?" " Only the rent money." "I've got nothing else." "When you did have extra money what did you used to do with it?" "When I had some left over, I'd buy things like this." "It cost 35,000 liras." "What do you do at this time?" "You must be tired." " Do you go straight to bed?" " l read." " What do you read?" " Mickey Mouse." "Pecos Bill." "It's three o'clock." "Like Anna, they go home, one by one, almost always on their own." "Most of them live far away, on the outskirts of the city." "After many hours spent waiting, they wait on the night tram for the never-ending journey to start." "Often when they get home, it's dawn and no one's waiting for them." " Do you live here alone?" " lt's my friend's house." " You didn't marry?" " No, I was going to." "I prepared the documents three times, but I didn't get married." "I still have the favours." "I have them here, look." "Men make promises, but then..." "Nearly all of them, if sufficiently pressed, will tell you stories of abandonment and deceit." "I'm 21 ." "I was engaged." "I had a baby and was dumped." "My father kicked me out and I came to Rome... to find work." "But you can't find work with a kid." "They won't have me." "Liliana, who we met on the outskirts, among these derelict shacks, has only recently started going out at night." "A week ago." "She thought of killing herself, but gave up the idea." "She could be like any other mother." "So many women like her could be saved by a little genuine love." "ATTEMPTED suicide" "When faced with suicide one is always dismayed." "Facing death by choice is a mysterious and absurd act." "These people tried to commit suicide." "We invited them here so they can tell us what pushed them to it." "One might ask why they're here, especially in view of their pasts." "Each has an almost morbid need to talk about their experiences, to talk about the fact they wanted to die." "But this is not all." "They also realise that such sincerity and analysis can help them and others in dealing with the only truly irremediable act man can commit." "But one thing is certain." "Often, especially when the motive is love, the period of depression is fleeting." "And once overcome, the passion for life should be easily restored." "Sometimes the cause is a financial or familial problem." "Love can make anything bearable. lf it goes, everything falls apart, as we shall see now." "Piazza Santa Croce di Gerusalemme, October 12th, 1952." "It's two o'clock in the afternoon." "These children and passers-by are about to witness a shocking incident." "The girl sitting on the bench is Rosanna Carta, she's 25." "She's waiting for her boyfriend, who was with her a few minutes ago." "Rosanna lives alone, in a housing estate in Rome." "Where are you going?" "Stay here." "Rosanna has a dog that keeps her company in the winter evenings." "She loves him like a son." " How long were you engaged?" " Eighteen months, he was possessive." "He didn't want me to work or look for work." "Or even to read." "He found me with a book once and he made a big scene." " What book was it?" " Chekhov." "Tell us what happened that day, on the bench." "I found out I was pregnant." "We'd already argued because he didn't want a baby." "That day, we'd arranged to meet..." " What did he say to you?" " He said..." "He told me he didn't want to accept any responsibility and he left." " Did you stay there waiting for him?" " Yes, I thought that... it was all over because he wasn't coming back." "What were your thoughts as you sat on the bench?" "I pictured having a baby and not being able to feed it." "Time went by and he didn't come back." "So I got up, and I knew what I had to do." "I was thrown to the ground, then he arrived." "He hadn't run off." "He'd just gone for a walk." "He took me to hospital." "The driver of the car felt responsible and offered me 100,000 liras." "But I knew he wasn't to blame so I didn't accept it, even though I needed it, to buy lots of things." "And your fiancé?" "We split up, maybe it was for the best." " So you didn't love him." " l did." "But over time I realised he was selfish." " Would you have married him?" " Yes, the harder things are, the more satisfaction you get, but now..." "During the post-war period, these girls did variety shows." "They were sisters: "Sister Baby" and specialised in exotic dancing." "Then the youngest one married and gave up work." "She had two children, but separated from her husband after two years." "One morning, in an arcade in Rome, passers-by saw a blonde girl fall to the ground." "She'd overdosed on barbiturates, but not enough." "The doctors knew right away it was a staged suicide." "She told them she wanted her husband to take her back." "We asked her why she wanted to go back to him since they didn't get along." "When had you last see your husband?" "A few days before, in a car with a woman." ""l bet he's loaded," l thought, while I had to work all night in a bar." "But when he came to the hospital, I realised he couldn't care less about me." "So I tried to kill myself for real." "There was a window right by my bed." "I tried to throw myself out of it, but a stupid nurse stopped me." " Then what did you do?" " l tried to slit my wrists." "But they saw me and tied me up." "So I started screaming like a mad woman and they put me in a mental hospital for 23 days." "Meanwhile, I reported my husband who took me back, also for the kid's sake." "I'll get you your plane, just be patient." "You don't seem happy to be home." "It's not that. lt's the same old routine - the kids, the house... lf l could, I'd do it again, but this time I want to die." " Why are you so pessimistic?" " lt's my only way out." " Don't you think of the children?" " They're important, of course." "But sometimes you lose your mind." "Misery and desperation drove this woman to leave her house on April 12th, last year." "Should she have been able to take comfort in the man she loved, nothing may have happened." "But he'd vanished all of a sudden." "I walked along the embankment and seeing all those bridges, I had an idea." "It was at that moment... that I started thinking there was no point going on." "I decided to end it all, but there were too many people." "At the next bridge, I walked down the steps." "A boy was fishing on the bank." "But when he saw me crying he got scared and ran away." "I went in... down there." "Did you jump in?" "I walked in slowly, till the water reached my chest." "I remember that... I could still touch the bank with one foot." "So I pushed myself off and the current dragged me away." "I bumped into that pillar." "By then, I didn't know what was happening." "I could see lots of people shouting and leaning over." "Then an eddy dragged me down and I lost consciousness." "Some men from that boat rescued me." " Then what happened?" " We got our boat and went to rescue her." "She'd been in the water five minutes, her clothes had kept her afloat." "She was unconscious because of the water she'd swallowed." "I woke up in the hospital." "My family and some friends came." "He came too, the man who'd rescued me." "He tried to comfort me with kind words, saying that I was too young and hadn't lived enough and so on." "I just looked at him, without saying a word." "So he said, "You look like you hate me, like you want to kill me."" "I said, "That's right."" "Weren't you happy to be alive?" "What for?" "Don't you think life has its good moments?" "At that time, I didn't. I thought life was horrible, that there was no hope." " But you're happy now." " Now, yes." "A small guesthouse in the so called "existential" district of Rome." "A few months ago, a young woman tried to kill herself here." "She's a typical example of that confused youth we often read about in the papers." "She and her boyfriend were in love." "One day, she met a man in his fifties who started to court her." "Absurd as it was, a combination of naivety, recklessness and cruelty, that only an 18-year-old could possess, led her to accept." "It was a father-daughter kind of love, but people started to gossip." "Her fiancé found out and left her." " Slow down!" " Come on!" " Antonio." " Yes, miss." " l'm broke." " Same here!" "Pay tomorrow." " Goodnight." " Goodnight, thank you." "Goodbye." "In her desperation, she locks herself in her room... and coldly and calmly... I cut as hard as I could, then I stayed here about an hour." "There was blood everywhere." "Then I got dressed and went out to the pharmacy." "I met two policemen on the way and they took me to hospital." "I got seven stitches." "I thought dying was easier." "What were your thoughts as you waited for the blood to come out?" "Nothing, I felt confused... I was frustrated it was taking so long." "Did you think of your fiancé?" "How were you feeling towards him?" "Very strongly." "He was the reason I did it." "Did you want to hang on to life?" "Life!" "People criticise youngsters because they're tired of living, but in actual fact I'm like that too, I don't give a damn." "When we asked you to do this interview, why did you accept so quickly?" "What moved you to relive that experience?" "I don't know, a number of different emotions." "Positive or negative ones?" "Explain a bit more." " Both, really." " What do you mean?" "I thought about it and decided that by talking to someone about it, in an honest way, I'd be able to understand what I did." "And is that so?" "Yes, I think so." "I see everything more clearly now." " l've reached some conclusions." " Like what?" "You know what?" "The future looks so uncertain... I'm 19 and I still don't know what I'm going to do." "I'd like to..." "I've often thought that..." " lt's so difficult." " Go on." "The truth is, I'd like to be an actress." "But not like those beauty queens, I want to do it properly, starting from scratch, like the great actresses." "I want to go to stage school, to study..." " But maybe I'm past it." " At your age?" "Maybe it's unconsciously done, but mightn't you be exaggerating rather?" "All suicides have their own story and it may be that psychology is the only way to explain them." "Or perhaps, as one of our guests simply put it," ""Be it good or bad, life must be lived"." "THREE HOURS OF paradise" "From five to eight, there is dancing at the Astoria." "There are soldiers and servants." "There's tango, mambo, boogie-woogie and foxtrot." "Three happy hours, three hours of paradise." " Let's make up." " Stop it!" " You always start." " No, you do." "First you argue, then you want to make up." "The answer is no." "If you don't stop, I'm going." "May I?" " Why not?" " Because I said so!" " Do you make love to her?" " Yes." "Sorry, then." "Let's dance." "Nice place, this!" "Wanna dance?" " May I, madam?" " Yes, go on." "Fix your dress." " So many pretty girls!" " She's hot!" " Wow!" " What a doll!" "Richetto!" "May I, miss?" "May I?" " Thank you." " You're welcome." " Sit down!" " Hands off!" " l saw you." " You're crazy!" "It's Gregory "Pecker"!" "Let's dance, I love this one!" " No." " Go to..." "Gosh, my feet are killing me!" "Sorry, Maria, I told you I can't dance." "That's not true, you're great." "No, we split up, our personalities clashed." " Has it been long since?" " Three months." " Three months." " Yes." "I'm glad you split up." " l'm not, I sort of loved him." " You still do?" "No, come on!" "I'm getting over him now." " Waiter, two seltzers." " A slice of lemon in mine." "What a looker!" " Watch it!" " What?" " What?" " Baldy!" "Moron!" "Take it outside!" "Don't hold me so tight!" " Thank you." " You're welcome." "My goodness, it's seven o'clock!" "Wait!" "END OF PART ONE" "PART TWO" "A journalist'S REPORT marriage AGENCY I'm going to tell you about something that actually happened to me." "I was doing a report on marriage agencies." "I knew nothing about them." "Someone gave me an address." "It led me to a large, old building, in an old district of Rome, and on the top floor, practically in the attic..." " Where's the Cibele Agency?" " What?" " The Cibele Agency." " l don't know." " Try at the end of the corridor." " Can I help you?" "Hello, I'm looking for..." "is the Cibele Agency here?" "." " Oh, the..." "What was it?" " Cibele." "The Cibele Agency." " l don't know, what is it?" " A marriage agency." " Try down there." " Down there?" " Thanks." " You're welcome." " l know where it is." " Really?" "What do you know?" "I know where the agency is, I'll take you." " Good girl." "Thank you." " You're welcome." "Susanna, I'm coming too." " Where are you going, Anna Maria?" " To the agency." " We're coming too." " ls it far?" "Where are we going?" " Did you see some kids go by?" " No." " Where's the Cibele Agency?" " The ones that do certificates?" "Never mind." "Hello." "Excuse me, I'm looking for a marriage agency." " Can you tell me..." " Mister!" "Come this way!" "You want the agency?" "Have a seat." " ls there a long wait?" " Just a minute." "May I have a word?" " Are they all waiting to be seen?" " Yes, but they won't be long." "Could you tell me..." "Who's in charge?" " Mrs. Cibele." " Right." "Listen..." "I'm in a hurry, it's a delicate matter." "Could you ask her to see me first?" "I run this place, I'm an ex-policeman." "I find out the clients' details, I was in the police for 20 years." "I only need a few hours to know everything." " Do you smoke?" " Thank you." "Very kind." "We only ask women for their details, because sometimes they have children." "We need to be very careful." "Are all these people your clients?" "Come with me." "That old couple?" "They're from out of town." "They want their son to marry, that's him." "And listen to this." "They want a girl with long blonde plaits." "Strange, eh?" "That was their exact request. "Long, blonde plaits."" " Hello." " Hi, sweetheart." " Do you arrange many weddings?" " Of course!" "At least five or six a month." " Your agency arranges them?" " Yes." "Come in." "Have a seat." "And I suddenly realised I had no idea what reason to give for my visit." "I came up with some bizarre story." "I invented a childhood friend, the son of rich landowners." "Nice, bright, but restricted to the countryside due to a mysterious illness." "He'd have terrible epileptic fits when it was full moon." "A case of lycanthropy, or werewolf syndrome." "I told her the doctors said marriage was his last hope for recovery." "I had never imagined the lady would say..." " We'll see to it." " What?" "Let's see." "This one might do." "Does laundry, cooking, cleaning and she's pretty." "She has a son." " May I see?" " No, it's confidential." " Just the photograph." " No, you wouldn't understand." "They're my notes." "Only I understand them." "This one might be suitable." "She's a brunette, sweet and works for the Post Office." "Did you hear me?" "I told you he's mad." " He's a werewolf and wealthy..." " Right, but..." "Why would a well-to-do girl agree to marry a... lf you please, sir, we only have nice girls." "We choose them carefully." "Right, Attilio?" "Right." "This room is too small for all the photos we get." "We need a second one and maybe one more." "You wouldn't believe some of the things we see here!" "Some girls make vows to the Virgin Mary to marry a blind man or a disabled soldier." "A werewolfs got to be better than a blind man, don't you think?" " Your name?" " Antonio Cifariello." "You can count on us." "We've found wives for all sorts." "Once, a dumb man came." "We understood what he wanted and found him a dumb wife." "Sign this form." "We'll arrange a meeting in a couple of days." "In return for 50,000, broken down as follows." "10,000 straight off, 25,000 after the first meeting, and 15,000 once they've agreed to marry..." " Hello?" " N325?" " Who?" " ls that N235?" "Hello?" "It's Mrs. Cibele, from the marriage agency." " Good morning." " l've got good news for you!" "We found someone." "Hello?" "Sir?" "Are you there?" " Yes, I'm here." " lt's all sorted. I've found our girl." "She's pretty and very nice..." "we mustn't let her get away." "I went to meet the girl who'd accepted to marry a werewolf." "I was expecting a laugh." "We're over here!" "What a nice car!" "is it yours?" "Your friend's?" "I won't say a word." "See for yourself." "You can't go wrong with her." " But did you tell her about him?" " No, I didn't." "Let me explain." "I did it for the good of your friend." "Let him meet the girl first." "Once they know each other, we'll tell her." " But that's..." " Look, I'm the expert here!" "You do your job, let me do mine!" "We mustn't scare her off." "Relax." "Let me get her." "Rossana!" "Wait a moment." "Your handbag." " This is Miss Rossana." " How do you do?" "I have to go now, maybe you could go for a spin..." " You have a car." " All right." "Off you go." " Get in!" " From the other side." "In you get!" "Sorry, she's a bit shy." "I'll see you later." "All right." " Goodbye." " Goodbye." "Be sure to let me know what you think." "I'll be at the agency till seven." "Bring her there." "Just a moment." "Now, you're going to be a lady." "A real lady, understand?" "Goodbye, sir." "May I ask you a question?" "What did the lady from the agency tell you?" " That he's young and very rich..." " Anything else?" "That he's got a big house in the country and lots of land." " What did you think?" " l laughed." " lt sounds too good to be true." " Why?" "Why would a rich man like that marry me?" "Didn't she tell you he was ill?" "He suffers from a strange illness." "He's not like other men." "He's a lycanthrope, maybe you don't know what that is." "He's influenced by the moon." "He's a sort of werewolf." "I'm sorry the lady from the agency didn't tell you." "What happens to him?" "When he has a fit, he writhes on the floor, screaming and shouting." "He doesn't recognise anyone, not even his mother." "The doctors say marriage might cure him." "Poor thing!" "So you would consider..." "But, is he a nice man?" "No, maybe you haven't understood." "He's really very ill." "No woman from his town would marry him." "It'd be a life of great sacrifice." "He can't go out alone, he always needs his nurses." "And you'd have to stay there too, in the country." "No travelling..." "But there'll be plenty of space to wander around on a big estate." "I suppose so." "But tell me, honestly." "Why would you do such a thing?" "What do you mean?" "Shall we get out?" "I mean, why would you marry him?" " You smoke?" " No, thanks. I don't smoke." " For my brother." " You have a brother?" " Yes, there are nine of us." " Do you live in Rome?" " No, in a town called Olevano." " Nine brothers?" "Yes, seven sisters and two brothers, but they're all young." " Are you the oldest?" " Yes." "Shall we sit over there?" "Sit down." " My dress will get dirty." " No, it's only grass." " Did you hurt yourself?" " No!" "I'll come up there." "There we go." "You didn't answer my question." "Why would you accept such a man?" "Well, I left home last year." "We're not from Rome, but from Olevano." "I'm poor and so is my family." " Why?" "What does your father do?" " He's a farmer, but he never works." " Never?" " Never ever!" "There are lots of mouths to feed." "So I decided to leave." "My sister-in-law lives in Rome." "She said, "Why not stay with me for a bit?"" "But then she said, "l can't support you."" "So, one day I... I hadn't eaten for three days, I felt so weak!" "I was simply exhausted so I sat down on a bench." "I was in Piazza Risorgimento and there was a paper next to me." "I saw the ad for the marriage agency." "So I thought, "l'll get married."" "I went to see the lady and she said, "Leave it with me."" "And yesterday...she called me." "And told me about your friend." "And so... lf this friend of yours is a nice man, then... I know myself." "I'll grow fond of him." "And, the poor thing, he's ill." "I know it won't be wonderful, but at least I'll be looked after and it won't be that bad, because I'll grow fond of him." "Would you let him marry your sister?" "No." "Let's just leave it, forget about it." "You wouldn't be suitable, I'm sorry." "It's best if you just forget it." "I'm sorry." "I knew I wouldn't be suitable." "Let's go back." "We drove back to the city in silence." "I wanted to say something to her, not to justify myself, but to help her." "I wanted to tell her to be more confident, to look around her, to open her eyes to the countless possibilities that life offers us every day." "But I didn't want to be rhetorical and I knew it'd be no use." "Her problems, her daily hardships would still be all that mattered to her." "I didn't say anything." "When we said goodbye, I sincerely wished her... good luck." "A TRUE STORY" "CATERlNA'S STORY" "No, Caterina Rigoglioso didn't try to kill herself." "She came to Rome in '49 from Sicily to find work," "She was seduced, then abandoned." "She was sent home and her family disowned her." "She came back to Rome and was arrested." "She was released, and she gave birth on New Year's Eve." "No, she didn't try to kill her "child of shame", as drawing-room moralists would put it." "She kept him and paid a nanny 7,000 liras a month to look after him." "7,000 is an enormous amount of money for an unemployed maid." "No, she didn't resort to stealing." "This is an accurate reconstruction of the last act of her story." "The woman you're watching now is Caterina Rigoglioso herself." "The boy is her son Carletto and this is the very location where her story took place." " Hello." " Hello." "I can't let you in, they're sleeping." "I told them about you, but she wants to see your papers." " You told her you know me?" " Of course!" "It all needs to be above board." "This is a guesthouse and someone may come to check, so it all had to be in order." "But I'll even take 8,000." "Come in, I'll tell her." "But don't get your hopes up, we've turned two girls away already." "Come on, in you come." " l'll speak to Madame." " All right. I'll wait here." "Hold on." " And if she's got no papers?" " Then I can't help her." "I told you, I don't want any trouble." "You really have nothing?" "A piece of paper?" "I've got my expulsion order." "If I ask for my documents they'll know I'm still here and arrest me." "My girl, I wouldn't stay here in your situation." "Go home." "I can't go back to Palermo." "What can I say?" "There's no persuading her." "Can you give me 100 liras?" "I've got no money." " l can do that." " Thanks, I'll keep looking." "You'll find something." " Bye." " Good luck." "Bye, Caterina." " A hundred liras worth of cherries." " Right away." "Are they good?" "They're expensive!" "I'd like a kilo, but they get more expensive every day." " Hey, we're waiting!" " lt's a nice day for it." "Caterina, stop!" "I can't take him back, don't you understand?" "He's not mine!" "I've come looking for you two days in a row." "What am I supposed to do?" "You owe me three months' pay, my husband's in hospital!" "I can't get a job, I've got an expulsion order, see?" "I sleep on the streets like a tramp." "You have to take him, I told the police about you!" "Mother of God!" "What can I do?" "My husband's in hospital and I have to feed my kids!" "I turned down another mother for you." " But I can't keep him." " Give me some time." "Take him and I'll drop the charges." "Come to the police station." "I can't. I don't have any papers." "If they know I'm here, they'll arrest me." "Come to Ferentino, I know the officers there." "They won't ask for your papers." "I'll pay your fare, come on." "You can stay with me for the night." "Vincenza Marocco, nanny... declares that... she does not intend to press... further charges against..." "Caterina Rigoglioso... as she will be taking back... her son... and she will undertake... to pay back..." "Mrs Marocco what she owes her." "Read, signed and witnessed." "Elisa, hurry up, I need you to look after the baby." "Times are hard, my girl!" "The only way to earn money is to be a nanny." "I have to take on another baby now." "You're not leaving before the winter, what am I to do?" "I can't starve to death." "I work hard, but even if we really tighten our belts, we need at least 400 liras a day." "I can't do miracles." "I could have kept Carletto." "I wish I could keep him." "But then he'd starve to death too." " What about the money?" " l'll send it to you when I get work." " Can I trust you?" " l'll sign an iou." " What good is that?" " l'll repay you bit by bit." " You'd better, you see how I live?" " l will. I will." " Why are his eyes red?" " They always are in the morning." "Bye, Carlo!" " Lidia loves Carlo." " Bye, Vincenza." " See you." " Bye, Lidia." " Cateri, are you going to Rome?" " Yes, goodbye." "Cateri, if you see Donata tell her Tonino's fine." " Hi Tonino. I'll send Mummy your love." " And tell her I want my wages." " All right." " Say goodbye." " ls this a new baby?" " His mother's well off." " She comes in her boss's car." " Maybe it's his kid!" " Are you going, Catari?" " Yes, bye." "Bye, Carlo!" "We're here, Carluccio." "Be a good boy." "See?" "We're here, Carluccio." "Be a good boy." "lLLEGlTlMATE children'S association" " Where do I get my ticket?" " Over there." "36." " ls this the ticket office?" " Over there." "Calm down, you'll get seen!" "Can I have a ticket?" "181 ." " ls this the queue?" " Go to the end!" "181 ." " l'd like to leave my boy here." " You mean you want to admit him?" " Yes." " Are you sick?" " ls the child sick?" " l have no money, no work." " l see, but are you resident here?" " Yes." " What's your name?" " Caterina Rigoglioso." "Rigoglioso's file!" "I need your papers." " l don't have any." " Where's your identity card?" "I lost it." "Mr Testa, write out a request for information." "So, you were at the foundling hospital from January '51 to March '52." "You're the one who gave birth on the street?" "All right." "Listen. I'll give you a request for information." "Go to the police station then come back here." " The police station?" " Are you afraid?" " No." " lt's the only way." "If you want him to be admitted right away." "Mr Testa, is it ready?" " There." " Thanks." "Take this to the police station." "Hopefully, they'll reply right away." "Then come back here." " All right." " Goodbye." "Could you give me an advance on my month's allowance?" "Just a little?" "Are you hungry, Carluccio?" "It's nice, isn't it?" "More?" "Do you like it?" "No more?" "Waiter?" "Yes, miss." " How much is it?" " 80 for the biscuits plus the milk." " lt's 130 liras in all." " l've only got 100." "Give me that, then." "Take these." "Thanks." "Are you hot, Carluccio?" "Be a good boy." "Be quiet!" "Come and look." "Carlo!" "Carlo!" "What have I done?" "Oh, God!" "Can I look at the paper, please?" "HEARTLESS MOTHER ABANDONS OWN SON" "little BOY being LOOKED AFTER AT THE "MARAlNl" Institute" "police investigation" " What do you want?" " l'm Carlo's mother, the boy who was brought here last night." "Come in." "I've come to take him back." "Come." " Where is he?" "I want to see him." " Come." " Where is he?" " Don't worry, he's fine." " But I want to see him!" " Sit down." "Sit down." "What's your name?" " Where are you from?" " Palermo, but where is he?" " Sit down." " l want to see him." "Wait, calm down." "Wait here." "I'll just be a minute." "Mother of abandoned boy found." ""give ME MY SON BACK" SAYS MOTHER in TEARS" "Tragic story of a mother who gave all for her baby boy" "Maid who abandoned son to go on trial" "Maid who abandoned son sentenced to 4 months with reprieve, acquitted following appeal." "ACT NOT DEEMED A crime" "acquitted following APPEAL Italians STARE" " Really?" " l sent it express post." "I sent it express post." "VOTE liberal" "Excuse me, miss..." "The first issue of The Spectator ends here." "It hasn't yet explored all possible aspects of love in the city, but it has left out the obvious and less interesting ones." "Our journal wants only to explore reality in its most intimate and authentic, and to do so with the style and objectives of a new and conscious form of cinema." "THE SPECTATOR LOVE in THE city"