"You are mine, my dear." "You are only mine." "3 00:00:43,710 -- 00:00:53,500 Whisper once into my ear." "You are only mine." "You are mine, my dear." "You are only mine." "Kripa!" "I heard from Kripa's friends ,you know that he often goes and sits alone at the crematorium." "Is that so ?" "Why do you think he does that ?" "That is where he saw his mother last." "May be that's why." "Why don't you spend some more time with him ?" "Whenever I spent time with him" "I realized he's going through a crisis." "Tell me honestly Sarah did I cause his crisis?" "Sudhangsu..." "Sudhangsu..." "How does one avert this Freudian replay of events ?" "She is no longer alive." "Yet the two of you continue to fight over her memory!" "What should I do then?" "Sudhangshu, I don't know what to say." "You have Sarah but Kripa doesn't have mom." "Now if I try to be his mom you two will start a competition over me." "What's the matter Kripa?" "Are you going out this late?" "No, I heard the music and came down." "Sit here." "Can I say something?" "Yes." "Of course, tell me." "What do you want to say?" "I can't find the answer to some questions." "Which questions?" "I found a book on father's shelf" "Bramacharya Gandhi and his woman associates written by Girija Kumar." "The book was quite fat." "I leafed through, read a little." "I feel quite confused after reading it." "What is your confusion about?" "Bapu and Brahmacharya." "I don't understand." "Gandhiji once wrote to his disciple Prema Ben that inspite of his strict vow of discipline and celibacy." "few drops of semen passed out from him." "He was very disappointed." "My question is what is the connection between... semen coming out and Brahmacharya?" "Brahmacharya means abstinence staying away from sex." "I don't know anything more than this." "If Brahmacharya means staying away from sex then why did Gandhiji sleep naked with young women?" "Why don't you talk about all this with your father ?" "I can't talk to him." "He feels intimidated even if I look at him." "I'll makes you friends again." "Now tell me what were you saying ?" "What Gandhiji did with the young women, was it right?" "What Gandhiji did or why he did it I know nothing about it." "Do you think his behavior was appropriate ?" "Kripa, hang on." "Let me read the book first." "Then we can talk on it." "whatever you will read..." "I have already read And then I'm asking you." "Kripa..." "Are you sure you want to talk to me about Gandhi?" "Are you curious about Gandhi or about sex?" "Sarah, you are looking very beautiful." "Will you please dance with me ?" "Kripa..." "Kripa..." "Kripa..." "You..." "I'll" "What have you done?" "You killed your father!" "Can you please drop me home ?" "Please!" "Today, if you were not there what would have happen to me?" "I might have been lying on the road all night." "Those animals hit me so hard it's paining." "See." "What are you seeing?" "I am Devi." "I am the top w**** here." "I didn't let those motherf****** f*** my butt." "So they kicked me out of the car." "So late at night where are you going alone?" "Were you looking for someone like me?" "I think you need to go to a doctor." "I have my medicine at my home." "I'll give some to you too." "Why?" "I can see you are in pain." "So you too." "What is this?" "I killed my father and run away from home." "I'm the w**** and you a killer!" "What?" "Won't you come upstairs with me?" "Won't you like to feed me my medicine?" "He came in my dreams at night. the one with the flute." "Krishna is in my heart I chant his name." "Krishna is in my heart I chant his name." "He said, 'Oh!" "My Radha!" "Without you I am only half of myself'" "'My flute calls you, Come, run to the river bank to me'" "He said, 'Oh!" "My Radha!" "Without you I am only half of myself'" "'My flute calls you'" "Now, I will take my medicine." "What?" "Wont you feed me my medicine?" "Oh God!" "You have blood on your hand." "I too have blood on my hand." "Come on!" "Let's wash it." "Here, boy!" "Come." "Come here!" "Come!" "I'm telling you." "Oh!" "It is only on your hands." "Give!" "How do you feel?" "How do you feel, about me?" "What are you thinking about?" "Did you really commit murder?" "I can't understand what happened ..." "Do you want to run away?" "Come!" "Let's run away together." "But where will you run away?" "Instead..." "Come!" "Let's dance." "I'll make you sit on my rod and then ring your bell." "You will sit on my lap and lean against me." "Come my darling ride my Hero cycle." "Come my darling ride my Hero cycle." "I'll make you sit on my rod and then ring your bell." "I'll make you sit on my rod and then ring your bell." "You will sit on my lap and lean against me." "Come my darling ride my Hero cycle." "Oh Hero!" "Come let's dance." "I'll make you sit on my rod and then ring your bell." "I'll make you sit on my rod and then ring your bell." "You will sit on my lap and lean against me." "Come my darling ride my Hero cycle." "Come my darling ride my Hero cycle." "Get lost." "B****!" "Where did you find him?" "What is his name?" "Oh Mother!" "He is a mere infant." "You fooled him into f****** you... and forgot to ask his name?" "Hey!" "Your nose is quite long." "Your d*** must be pretty long too!" "100%" "Take this." "Do you know this place ?" "It's a brothel." "People come here and pay to f***!" "This house is mine." "And this w**** belongs to me too." "What are you doing here?" "Wear your clothes... and go home." "Let me explain." "Get out w****!" "Open the door motherf*****!" "Open." "Your mouth has become so dry," "Have you eaten anything?" "What is your name?" "Kripa." "Hey listen..." "Your lips are really very beautiful." "Will you give them to me?" "I want to go." "Of course you will." "But give me your lips before you go." "Please!" "Kiss me at least once before you go." "Won't you give me?" "Kiss me..." "Give me your lips." "No one can come in from the outside." "No one can go out from the inside." "Imagine, if this happens..." "Imagine, if this happens..." "You and I... locked in a room... and the key is lost." "You and I..." "I have seen you before at the cremation ground." "Do you go there often?" "Mother!" "Mother!" "Mother!" "Mother!" "Mother!" "Who are you?" " What do you want ?" " Ma" "Please listen to me." "I am not mad." "Don't be afraid." "Tell me what's hapened?" "Mother." "You are exactly my Mother." "When I saw you at the banks of the river Ganga ... my world turned." "Who are you?" "My name is Kripa Sankar Ray." "My mother passed away one year ago." "You remember your mother often?" "Yes." "But... last night I killed my father." "I ran away from home." "I met Devi on the road." "I went to Devi's house with her." "Another murder..." "The whole night I've just been killing... and running." "And then I met you Ma." "Listen Kripa Shankar!" "I am not your mother." "My name is Sadhana." "I am an ascetic." "Sadhana Mother." "Sadhana Mother." "Sadhana Mother!" "Sadhana Mother!" "Sadhana Mother, where have you gone?" "I'm calling you for so long." "Can't you hear me!" "The tides rise in the woman every month..." "The tides rise in the woman every month... at the place where the three holy rivers meet in the woman's body." "Ganga, Jamuna, Saraswati." "Ganga, Jamuna, Saraswati." "The three holy rivers in a woman's body, Ganga, Jamuna, Saraswati." "When the rivers are turbulent... it is the play of these three holy rivers." "One is black, One is white and other red." "When you bathe in these holy rivers... you become like the Lord." "The three holy rivers in a woman's body, Ganga, Jamuna, Saraswati." "Who knows the nature of woman?" "The Lord knows a little." "One of them he keeps on his head, one on his chest." "Women are of three kinds - they express... three different qualities of love" "The three holy rivers in a woman's body, Ganga, Jamuna, Saraswati." "This time after death I want to be reborn as a woman... and immerse myself in the sea of love." "I will learn from the holy ascetics, the practice of love." "This time after death I want to be reborn as a woman... and immerse myself in the sea of love." "I will learn from the holy ascetics, the practice of love." "Sadhana Mother..." "I have thought of a boy for you." "You know him." "He is a very devout boy." "Our Mansoor." "If you give your consent..." "I will talk to him for your marriage." "Marriage?" "I dont want to marry Baba." "Why?" "Ma." "When I was eight years old... you found me at the fair lost and alone." "Since then you have given me shelter." "Now if you again send me back out into the world." "It will be very difficult for me." "But Ma... our ashram is for spiritual practice... in order to live here you will have to learn all that." "And without a Master you will not be able to learn." "Whatever you say, Baba!" "Since your childhood, you have been to so many ashrams." "Do you have anyone in mind that you want as your Master?" "You are everything I have Baba." "I have no one in my mind except you." "You be my Master." "Oh!" "So this is what you have in mind." "You have already decided everything on your own." "Baba!" "Listen Ma!" "Those of us who are in the Fakiri tradition... and practice Dehotathya... believe that God is in the body." "You have grown up listening to so many of our songs." "All this is written in those songs." "I understand a bit Baba." "In our fakiri tradition it is said that... at the birth of creation the subtle and formless manifest itself." "I am the present form of that." "Because I have evolved from there." "I can say that I was the formless too." "But in the course of evolution the subtle 'I' has become gross." "And moved very far away... and forgotten it's own formless subtle self." "Now by going reverse in the creative act." "I can move up my gross self closer to the subtle self." "I will be again be reunited with the formless." "Do you understand Ma?" "The one who is worshipping and the one who is being worshipped... are both one and the same me." "That entity is formless... and this one has form." "That is why man is at the same time form and formless... known and unknown." "On the path to the subtle self the biggest obstacle is sexual desire." "Worldly people fall into the trap of sexual desire... and are never able to break free." "Baba, is it sexual desire that prevents us from becoming our real selves?" "Yes." "But then you cannot attain your true self by running away from sex." "Then how it is done Baba?" "In our body amongst the six senses... the main one is sexual desire." "Sexual desire is the main force for creation." "Because sexual desire is energy... it cannot be destroyed." "But it can be transformed." "You can through spiritual practice... transform your gross sexual energy into abstract love." "Only then will you be able to reach your real formless self." "The battle with lust is very difficult Ma." "Don't ever forget... from today you have joined this battle too." "Ruhul baba are you home?" "Mansoor has again brought fish." "Mansoor!" "have lunch here today." "Ok." "By practicing the tradition of the four moons, the lotus in my heart blooms" "with the light that grows." "This is the time to be at the feet of the Guru and pray." "Oh my innocent mind!" "This is the time to be at the feet of the Guru and pray." "By practicing the tradition of the four moons, the lotus in my heart blooms with the light that grows." "This is the time to be at the feet of the Master and pray." "Oh my innocent mind!" "This is the time to be at the feet of the Master and pray." "The tradition of the four moons comes from the family of the Prophet." "Learn this path, till you have the time." "The tradition of the four moons comes from the family of the Prophet." "Learn this path, till you have the time." "Oh my innocent mind!" "This is the time to be at the feet of the Master and pray." "Oh!" "Father..." "You have fallen in the trap of desire." "Beware!" "For the pleasure of your body... don't fall pray to desire." "Sadhana Ma!" "In our practice of the body... the woman is the Master." "And the man is her disciple." "It is by holding your hand... that I will be able to move up." "If you lose patience..." "I will become directionless." "Do some breathing practice." "Take in the breath from your left nostril... and breath it out from the right." "The most important aspect of our Dehotathya is the breathing practice." "Breathing techniques can help us stop our body juices from flowing out." "As our sexual juices come down we can control it's descent with breathing techniques." "In the sexual act by controlling the heat to the body... we can purify our juice and move it upwards." "This is the skill that you have to learn Ma." "Only then you can transform." "From the one who has sexual desire to the one who is in the bliss of eternal love." "Otherwise how will you meet the eternal lover, the God inside you?" "It is you who are the eternal lovers of the universe." "Will the Master allow me to be at his feet" "Day and night I make mistakes" "Will the Master allow me to be at his feet" "through the pangs of birth" "I came into this world through the darkness of the womb." "Which I have now forgotten after coming into this world." "Will the Master allow me to be at his feet" "I failed to recognise the worth of my Master." "I could not understand his practice." "I have to again repeat the cycle of rebirths." "Will the Master allow me to be at his feet." "One whose self is immersed in the image of the Master has no fear of death" "One whose self is immersed in the image of the Master" "has no fear of death." "Lalon says" " Oh my mind!" "Lalon says" " Oh my mind!" "Please help me to stay focussed." "Will the Master allow me to be at his feet" "Sadhana Ma please come here." "What's happened, Baba?" "I have just received news of my wife Amina's death." "As I am a Marfati fakir... so the Shariat people have given a fatwa... that Amina has no place in the village's burial ground." "They have also said that... whoever tries to bury her anywhere outside the village... they too will be thrown out." "In this way they are threatening the villagers." "This is what you get if you become a fakir." "But, Baba!" "But you always told me Amina Mother had followed the Shariat." "Then... what's her fault?" "Fault!" "Her fault is she hasn't given me Talaaq on the Moulavis orders." "On the contrary, she said in a meeting of the Shariat people that she does not have any allegation against me." "Amina Ma said that in their meeting?" "Yes." "Yes Ma." "There was no other human like Amina." "Then let's go there now." "Let's bury her somewhere else." "No." "No one will come with me." "I am punished for my faith." "I have to take the responsibility of my punishment alone." "I don't give anyone permission to go there." "Else they will also be victims of such punishments." "But Baba, where will you bury her?" "I took fakiri out of my own volition." "But why should she be punished for my faith?" "I'll bring her from the village." "I'll bury her in front of our ashram." "Baba... your village is five miles from here!" "Sadhana Ma... don't argue now on this now." "Go to the ashram and bring a shovel and spade to keep under the tree." "Tell everyone not be worried about this." "Everyone should stay inside." "They must not come out to help me." "I'll enter the ashram after burying her alone." "Dear Noor..." "Can you give me a cloth please?" "One whose body has been burnt fine by the Guru's touch" "This body cannot be destroyed by the soil the earth does not have that power" "The body has already been burnt and turned fine" "Allah, made man from the earth" "The Master made the man finer, more true." "Now the energy flows only upwards and never comes down" "The Koran says there is no death now" "The body has already been burnt and turned fine" "One whose body has been burnt fine by the Guru's touch" "All beings other than mankind their nature remains the same as the Creator made them." "But man is different, such a creation can't be seen anywhere in this world." "The body has already been burnt and turned fine" "One whose body has been burnt fine by the Master's touch" "By only doing good deeds will one find God?" "I don't think so." "Hassan has not yet been able to fulfill his master Israel Shah's expectations." "The body has already been burnt and turned fine" "One whose body has been burnt fine by the Master's touch" "Mansoor!" "Ruhul Baba's last wish was that his face be turned towards Ma Amina." "What are you saying Sadhana Ma?" "He was a Muslim." "Many renowned Fakirs have been buried with their heads turned towards the Kaba in the west." "It's impossible." "We can't go against traditional rules." "Mansoor!" "You tell them what our Master's last wish was!" "But, Sadhana Ma" "Was our ailing Master in his full senses when he said so?" "I think we should follow the time honoured tradition." "Mansoor and all who are here, listen to me!" "My Master was only a human being for you." "but to me... he was God." "He had taught me that human beings are actually none other than God!" "The poor and low caste people like us... have always been kicked around and beaten in the name of religion." "And insulted by people." "My Master's last wish was... his burial should be a symbolic protest against this religious torture." "If anyone of you... wish to bury my Master as per his wishes... please help me... or else go away." "Sadhana Ma, forgive me!" "Let us place his head as he himself wanted in mother Amina's direction." "Kripa Shankar Roy, age 18, father's name Dr Sudhangshu Sekhar Roy." "fair complexioned, height 5ft 10 inches." "This person is missing from last night." "If anyone has information regarding the missing person, please contact us at... 22145671." "You were right." "I do look like your mother." "Ma." "I have nowhere to go." "Please keep me with you." "You say you have committed murder." "You don't... look like someone... who could do such things." "Kripa in desparation you are running away from your life." "Your mother gave you birth and brought you into being." "I will give you another birth... you will transform from a being to a human being." "I will do what you say, Ma." "I can't take it anymore." "Don't worry, eat now." "After you finish eating wash the dishes and come to my room." "Why are you running away?" "Why are you so silent ?" "Say something." "No!" "I mean..." "Let me go to the other room." "Look at me." "Come and sit beside me." "Do you... feel sexual desire?" "I know you feel desire." "Isn't that so?" "Then why are you so far away?" "Come close." "fulfill your desire and be happy." "You are keeping your desire suppressed." "Inside you feel desire." "On the outside you show that you are cool... what's the use?" "What are you saying Ma!" "This sexual desire which is rising in you... can you tell what is the source?" "Source?" "First you feel it in the mind... then the body." "Your mind is your main faculty... without addressing the problem in your mind." "If on the outside you pretend all is well... what is the use?" "If I had been wearing clothes... the feeling of sexual desire could still have come." "Don't you masturbate?" "Don't you have wet dreams?" "Yes." "It does happen Ma." "That's why Baba you are wasting away... destroying yourself... with clothes on and also without them." "How are you free?" "Yes!" "Baba, you are a slave to your desires." "And in the race to fulfill these desires... there is so much hatred... and bloodshed amongst humans." "Where will you run away from here?" "Ma!" "Please save me." "I am tired of running away." "If you wish to save yourself... you will have to know Dehotathyo." "What is that?" "It is to engage in the sexual act... direct the sexual fluids... in to the body rather than outside, this game." "This is what we call Brahmacharya." "You are talking like Mahatma Gandhi." "He used to say that... to understand non violence." "One should practice Bhahmacharya." "What is that Brahmacharya?" "Gandhiji used to sleep naked with women." "Because he wanted to raise himself... up beyond sexual desire." "What was he doing sleeping naked with women." "He had so much self control... that he never got excited." "You have to give up sex to became a Brahmachari." "Is that possible Baba?" "There is a certain kind of Brahmacharya which is recognized by society." "By giving up women and wealth and by wearing a loin cloth... that Brahmacharya has to be protected." "But the practice of Brahmacharya along with women is disliked by them." "That is why they hate us." "You are talking of Mahatma Gandhi." "Ok." "Did he learn from a Master?" "And then practice Brahmacharya with a woman in the sexual act?" "How did he see woman?" "That is the real essence." "You cannot be in Brahmacharya by giving up woman." "We say that the Women's energy flows inwards... and the male's energy outwards." "In the sexual act by acquiring the ability from the female energy... to direct energy inwards Brahmacharya can be learnt." "Kripa." "If you waste a drop of your sexual juice... then know that death has occurred to you." "You killed your own self." "That is the beginning of your violence." "I will sleep now." "I have to rise at dawn." "Sadhana Ma." "I am sleepy." "Are you feeling alright?" "I have never felt better." "Can I go upstairs?" "How many times should I tell you... not to fall in the trap of desire." "Don't forget..." "I am your Master." "Your Mother." "Imagine your body as a cooking vessel..." "In which sugarcane juice is being heated." "With the heat the sugarcane juice swells up..." "It begins to overflow and that's when the fire is reduced." "In this way by repeated heating and lowering of temperature... the sugarcane juice is condensed." "After this stage even with heating the juice does not overflow anymore." "This is how I am heating the juice in your body." "Now it is coming down." "Kripa, keep looking into my eyes... or you will drown in desire." "your semen will drop out." "Oh!" "Ma" "This is how I stop heating your body... and the flow of the juice recedes." "If you worship the Mother you will know about your Father" "You asked me to meet you if I loved you, and I did so." "this is the hidden truth we learn." "If you worship the Mother you will know about your Father" "If we do not learn this secret truth we cannot know the mother either." "The one upon whom Allah has put the responsibility of the world" "If you worship the Mother you will know about your Father" "If you worship the Mother you will know about your Father" "It is said that the woman was made from the man's body" "The female is the real nature of the world" "from whom we learn about Creation" "I have learnt from my Master... there are three channels in the body." "On the left is Ira." "On the right side is Pingala... and at the centre is Sushumna." "All these three channels converge at a point in the human body." "at the door from where life emerges, the Vagina." "This is what we call in our songs... the confluence of the three rivers." "This Ira, Pingala, Sushumna are the three holy rivers Ganga, Jamuna,and Saraswati." "And this is where, there is high tide." "Ira is the path of high tide... to move up." "Pingala is the way of low tide... to come down." "During the sexual practice... the man has to bring down his juices... through the Pingala channel... and then take the juices up through the Ira channel... with regular practice... at one time it is possible to discard both these channels... and through the Susunmna channel at the centre take the body juice upwards." "One who can do this... he is the Ascetic." "During our menstruation, after three days... when the blood flow begins to reduce... due to the pull of the low tide... the creator descends down... to the confluence of the three rivers." "After long years of practice... the Ascetic is able to see the Creator... whom we in our songs call the formless one... the one who is in our heart... the simple one... the one who steals our heart... so many names we have for him." "The first three days of our menstrual cycle... is the dark phase or no moon... and the creator descending down is... the appearance of the moon." "Kripa." "Please come back home." "Don't misunderstand me." "Wherever you are, come back home." "Look..." "I am ok." "Kripa, I haven t forgotten you for a moment." "That night." "Your face and the pain in my body." "I can't tell you what is going through my mind and my heart." "Look, I've kept your precious locket so carefully." "I'll return it to you." "Please come back, darling." "Come back." "Kripa!" "I saw on television that my father and Jonaki are alive." "Did you really believe... you had really murdered them?" "I was afraid Ma." "My father is asking me to go back to him." "How can I leave you and go back to him?" "What do you want to do now?" "I want to leave this city and go away Ma." "Until I finish learning from you." "I don t wish to go anywere near that world." "Then where do you want to go?" "Can we not go and stay at Ruhul Baba's ashram Ma?" "It's been a long time since I left that place." "Does it still exist?" "All right." "let's go there." "You look familiar." "Where have I seen you before?" "On TV." "Hello..." "Hello." "Father, it's me, Kripa." "Kripa!" "Where are you?" "I am happy where I am." "You..." "You immediately come home!" "I've changed completely Father." "We'll talk about it later you come home right now." "It won t be possible for us to meet now." "I'll phone you from time to time." "You forget about that night Kripa." "That was an accident." "I'm absolutely fine now." "I feel relieved after hearing your voice Father." "You come back Kripa everything will be fine." "Father, you won't be able to accept me... the way I am now." "What are you saying?" "Please come to me at least once." "All right." "Come tomorrow night at 8 pm to the Ladies Park." "Park!" "Why at the park?" "You come home." "No, not at home." "Come to the park." "Come alone." "This is between you, me and my mother." "My God!" "Kripa... you are with your dead mother!" "Father!" "She's a living person." "She has given birth to me again." "What are you saying, Kripa!" "What am I seeing?" "What you are seeing... is the truth Father." "No!" "Kripa!" "Father!" "Father!" "Don't be afraid." "Father listen!" "Father!" "Father!" "Kripa!" " Do you remember me?" " Jonaki!" "You again!" "Yes." "Have you seen my father?" "Yes, I saw him." "I have come to take you to him." "Who are you?" "Who are you?" "Open the locket." "What?" "She is my mother." "Mother!" "I won't leave mother and go to father's house." "Fine, then come with your mother to my house." "I want to leave this city and go away Jonaki." "Don't try to stop me." "Like the other night don't try to use force... or else there could be another accident." "May be this time I'll get hurt." "May be that's what you want?" "No, Kripa." "I don't want that." "Do you know... that night I fell down and broke my bones." "I bled so much." "Even then I had your locket in my hand." "This locket saved me." "I knew it for sure that I would meet you some day... and I will put back this locket around your neck." "I have fallen in love with you, Kripa." "How can I live without you?" "Come with me, just once." "Mother!" "Please come with us." "We'll all live together." "Kripa!" "Leave my mother!" "Kripa!" "Leave my mother!" "Jonaki!" "You are being obstinate again." "Why have you touched my mother?" "Release her at once!" "Okay!" "I release your mother!" "But having found you." "I don't want to lose you again." "You are the Krishna of my dreams." "Lord Krishna has said in the Bhagawat Gita... that he appears in every age to rescue the saints... to destroy evil and to establish the Hindu religion..." "Lord Krishna has said that he appears in every age to protect religion." "Please don't throw bricks on us we are here to protect the Hindu religion!" "Please do not attack us!" "Please be peaceful." "Please do not attack us!" "Please do not attack us!" "Please be peaceful." "Kripa!" "Why are you running after him?" "He will not go to you." "Why not?" "Ma, you are a woman!" "There is a woman inside me too." "I too have feelings of love and affection." "Can't you understand?" "I love him." "Is love only physical?" "Is it not something from within?" "What you call love is it not lust?" "Why is there so much violence in your love?" "Kripa!" "Ma!" "Ma..." "Ma!" "Sadhana Ma!" "Khokon!" "What have you done?" "Ma!" "This is not what I wanted." "I did not want this." "Forgive me, Kripa!" "Forgive me." "Push harder...!" "Ma!" "Ma!" "Ma!" "Which way do I go, Ma!" "Ma!" "Which way is Ruhul Baba's ashram Ma?" "Ira!" "Pingala!" "Sushumna!"