"♪ Let me be your star ♪" "Previously on "smash"." "Go get me a Marilyn." "This girl feels like Marilyn." "You have to do another callback?" "It's Ivy's spark." "Marilyn the musical?" "No one is gonna buy it." "We know what kind of money you make." "You're a waitress." "I think she's a star." " I want to go back to work." " And what about the adoption?" " You got it." "You're Marilyn." " [Laughing]" "[Glass tinkling]" "SMASH S01 Ep 03" " Enter Mr. DiMaggio" "♪" "[Breathing heavily]" "Mm..." "That was incredible." "It was lovely." "[Both moaning softly]" "Tom hasn't sent you a copy of the new song yet, has he?" "I don't think it's finished." "Great." "Three weeks till we start rehearsing, we've only got eight songs and half the book." "You know, Derek, I've been reading a lot about Marilyn, and watching the DVDs, and I'd really like it if..." "I'd really like to get together sometime and just work on her." "Well, that's what we're doing, darling." "Mm." "[Chuckles] Oh..." "It's a joke." "Oh." "[Laughs]" "Of course we can do that." "I'll have my assistant call you." "We'll put it in the book." "'Kay?" "'Kay." "[Laughs]" "So, let me get this right." "You got the part, you get to play Marilyn, you're sleeping with the evil director," " who's a total fox." " He's not evil." "He may or may not be evil, but he's definitely a fox." "And the problem is..." "Okay, I'm just gonna say it." "Do you think he gave me the part because I slept with him?" " I can't imagine that it hurt." " I'm serious." "For heaven's sakes, Ivy, enjoy the sex, and don't think about it." "You got the part." "You got the part." " They're beautiful pieces." " Yes." "If you sell them on consignment, you make considerably more." "I think I'll just let them go." "Okay." "Those are fun." "They were inspired by a pair Marilyn Monroe wore in Seven year itch." "I can see that." " 50 bucks." " Oh, they're just knockoffs." "I'll take 'em." " Hi." " Karen, hi." "Thanks for coming." "Hey, another one of these, please, for her." "Oh, no, please." "Just a club soda." "So, I wanted to talk to you about what happened." "I know what happened." "I didn't get the part." "Look, the script and the songs aren't even finished yet." "There's a lot of changes coming fast." "We just needed someone with more experience with that." "Well, she's lucky." "It's a great part, and the songs are amazing." "Mm-hmm." "So, how do you feel about being in the ensemble?" "Well, it's a terrific opportunity." "Well done." "Very polite." "Well, what am I supposed to say, I'm pissed?" "Yeah, you should be." "You got way too much talent to be in the ensemble." "Then why did you put me there?" "Listen." "Life is long." "Theater is longer." "It could take five years for Mariynl to get to the stage, and a lot can happen in five years." "There you are." "Dev." "What are you doing here?" "Well, you said you were having drinks with the great director," "I wanted to meet him." "Sorry to crash." "[Laughs]" "Dev." "Dev sundaram." "Derek Wills." "Karen's told me a lot about you." "I imagine so." "Pleased to meet you." "Are you from, uh, South London?" "Well done." "I could hear it in the O's." "Oh, I'd forgotten this game." "University?" "Oxford, you?" " The other place." " Ah." " I expect you got a first." " I did, actually." "Mm." "That's a lot of pressure." "Sorry?" "Mum and dad just off the boat, all that hope wrapped up in little, old you." "Congratulations." " I'm third generation." " Of course." "I should have heard it in the O's." "I just don't know what you were doing there." "You said the guy was a jerk, he is a jerk." "He's a jerk who is now my boss, and I can take care of myself." "I know you can." ""Ooh, Oxford." "Ooh, the other place."" "What is the other place?" "Cambridge." "Of course!" "I can hear it in the "O" s." "Oh, we're Brits." "That's what we do to establish our place in the pack." "So who won?" "Well, I got to go home with the girl, didn't I?" "Oh, that display was not for me." "No, you're right." "Got something much better I want to show off to you." "Well, I'm looking forward to it, because all that British ranting about what school you went to left me pretty unimpressed." " How's this?" " Wow." "What movie are we doing now?" "Gone with the wind, baby." "[Orchestra warming up]" "♪" "[Baton taps]" "[Sighs] How many more do I need to see?" "My eyes are about to start bleeding." "We can take a five and start talking offers." "Yeah, that sounds brilliant." "Okay." "These are our top picks for DiMaggio, Arthur Miller, and JFK." "And I just got a call from the agent." "Michael Swift is available, if you're interested in making him an offer for DiMaggio." "He did a show with you, right?" "Yes." "Well, he's terrific." "Mm-hmm." "Well, is he..." "Is he right for this?" "I've never seen him." "Well, he's doing that Bruno Mars show at La Mama." "Well, let's check him out tonight." "♪ Yes, I would die for you, baby ♪" "♪ easy come, easy go" "♪ that's just how you live ♪" "♪ oh, take, take, take it all ♪" "♪ but you never give" "♪ should've known you was trouble ♪" "♪ from the first kiss" "♪ had your eyes wide open" "♪ why were they open?" "♪ Gave you all I had" "♪ and you tsed it in the trash ♪" "♪ you tossed it in the trash, yes, you did ♪" "♪ to give me all your love" "♪ is all I ever asked" "♪ 'cause what you don't understand ♪" "♪ is I'd catch a grenade for ya ♪" "♪ throw my hand on a blade for ya ♪" "♪ I'd jump in front of a train for ya ♪" "♪ you know I'd do anything for ya ♪" "♪ oh" "♪ I would go through all this pain ♪" "♪ take a bullet straight through my brain ♪" "♪ yes, I would die for you, baby ♪" "♪ but you won't do the same ♪" "Okay, he's sensational, but is he interested?" "Well, apparently, he's a huge baseball fan." "Is that the same thing as a "yes"?" "Jerry, hello." "Derek." "Great to see you." "Eileen, hi." "Hello, Jerry." "Listen, uh, Derek, I'm glad I bumped into you." "You have to give me one more chance to tempt you back to My fair lady." "Yeah, maybe we can talk about that in the morning, Jerry." "We could be going by the end of the month." "You look beautiful, Eileen." "Nice earrings." "Very quaint." "Who gave 'em to ya?" "Oh." "I'm sorry, I don't know why that keeps happening." "I'm such a klutz." " Should we get some menus?" " Sure." "Oh, well." "In this business, any job is a good one." "Only don't call it the "chorus," it's the "ensemble."" "Although, if you ask me, that's like calling garbage men "sanitation workers."" "[Laughs]" "It's a great project, and the music is incredible." "When does it start?" "Uh, well, it's a workshop, so they haven't finished casting it or even writing it, so their dates are flexible." " Ah, it's one of those." " Wait, one of what?" "Just you end up missing a lot of shifts with those things." "And you know they pay next to nothing, right?" "And you're already taking this weekend off?" "I'm going to Iowa for a baby shower." "Yeah." "If you're gonna keep doing a lot of those workshops, that's the kind of thing that goes out the window." "[Playing piano]" "♪" "Doesn't it want to be a little more ballad-y?" "I like the Sinatra swing idea." "I just think it..." "I think it needs more heart." "I think it sounds amazing." "Thank you, Ellis." "Oh, here, let me do that for you." "I know, I know, I'm going." "I have to get the dry-cleaning." "And you have to be at the dentist at 4:00." " Oh, no, no, no!" " You're doing it." "I'm getting my teeth cleaned." ""No, no, no."" "I like him." "Why do you not like him?" "I don't have to like everybody." " You don't like Derek." " Do you like Derek?" "I do, actually." "You like Derek." "I think he's talented." "You know what?" "Those two tigers that ended up eating siegfried and Roy were talented too." "That's ridiculous." "It's not ridiculous, it's true." "That was a tragedy." "That's my point." "[Laughs]" "Mr. and Mrs. Smith." "That's all Joe and Marilyn wanted." "They just wanted to be a normal couple." "That's not all they wanted." "At this moment, in this song, it is." "Speaking of Joe, Eileen and Derek apparently went to see" "Michael at that Bruno Mars thing down at La Mama." "They loved him." "[Tea kettle whistling] Well, if he's doing that Bruno Mars thing down at LA mama, how's he available for the workshop?" "It's closing on Sunday." "I heard it was extending." "Not according to the agent." "Oh, the agent." "Now that's a reliable source." "Why would he tell us his client was available if he wasn't?" "I just don't want you to get your heart set on someone who isn't available." "And I'm not sure he's right." "Are you kidding?" "He's perfect." "You know, I don't love DiMaggio as a character." "Maybe we don't need him." "Uh... great idea." "Let's do Marilyn the musical without Joe DiMaggio." "Hey, here's an idea." "Let's skip Arthur Miller too." "And JFK." "Let's do it without men altogether." "Chugga, chugga, chugga, chugga..." "No, don't do it." "Aah!" "[Imitates crash]" "[Laughs]" "That's a good one." "I have to go on the bridge." "All right, here we go." " Do it again." " [Laughs]" "I know, I like this game too." "When does it start?" "Uh, three weeks." "It's just a workshop." "It's Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio." "And they just offered it to you, right?" "It's a straight offer." "Yeah, my agent's working on it." "But, you know, it pays, like, 200 a week." "Artie'd have to go into full-time day care." "It's Joe DiMaggio, honey." "And Julia Houston and Tom Levitt are writing it?" "Yeah." "You told me you liked working with them." "I loved it." "So, if you have any questions, why don't you just call them?" "If I call, it's sort of like saying yes." "And that's a problem because..." "Maybe I should keep myself open for once." "There's a lot going on in television." "So, you're gonna pass on playing Joe DiMaggio for something that might turn up in television?" "Daddy's crazy." "[Chuckles]" " Want dinner?" " Yeah." " Pizza?" " Yeah, pizza." "You want pizza?" "I'm so tired of revivals." "Aren't you?" "What are the specs?" "Well, it's not going to be cheap." "But given that we're taking on Marilyn Monroe, you wouldn't expect it to be." "And what's Jerry's involvement, now that the two of you are split up?" "Jerry has no involvement." "Really?" "You think that you can raise all this money yourself?" "I'm producing it myself." "Which you've never done before." "And all your assets are in escrow." "[Laughs]" "It's only a workshop." "All I need is 200,000." "Oh, good!" "[Snickers]" "Ugh, I can never figure out what to pack for three days." "Maybe I should just stay home." "You've been looking forward to this for months." "Let's be real." "Baby showers are not that much fun." "She's your best friend." "And she's holding a baby shower in a karaoke bar." "I think that sounds like fun." "[Exhales]" "I'm worried about money." "If I go, I'll miss four shifts at work." "The workshop starts, I'll miss even more." "Karen, if you don't want to go, then don't go." "But you can't not go because of money." "I can cover us." "I don't know if I'm ready for that." "Well, you don't have to decide this second." "Go home." "Have a good time." "Then we can talk about it." "You've already paid for the plane ticket." "And besides, the entire state of Iowa would be crushed if you don't show up." "[Laughs]" "That's true." "Mm-hmm." "Come on, let's get you packed." "How'd you get that job anyway?" "I mean, you walk into New York, and Tom Levitt hires you to be his assistant?" "He's huge." "My mom knew his brother in college." "[Chuckles]" "Slept with his brother in college." " Are they paying you?" " Of course they're paying me." "Tom pays me." "I don't mean paying you to get coffee, paying you for the idea." "They should pay you for that." "I don't get paid for that." "It's your idea." "No, I'm good." " What did they want?" " [Plays piano]" "Joe and Marilyn." "What did they yearn for?" "They didn't want publicists around all the time." "They got tired of the phones ringing all the time." "What did they want?" "[Sighs] A nice, little house." "A home-cooked meal." "DiMaggio loved his sister's meatballs." "That's not what they wanted." "It is, actually." "They also wanted the phones to stop ringing, and their stupid publicists to leave them alone." "They wanted a simple life together that was uncomplicated." "Marriage is a good thing." ""Marriage is a good thing."" "Who's arguing with you?" ""Marriage is a good thing."" "What are you looking for?" "Um, my... my notebook." "I want to see what I put down for the first draft." "Where's my bag?" "It's in the kitchen." "I had Ellis call Eileen's office." "They made an offer to Michael." "[Scoffs] I'm telling you, Tom, it's a long shot." "He's not gonna do it." "♪" "There she is." " What happened to the beard?" " Oh, your mom hated it." " Oh." " [Laughs]" "Oh, look at you." "You need help, mom?" "Oh, let me get that, honey." "Y-you go on in." "Okay." "[Grunts] Oh!" "Bring half of New York with ya?" "[Laughs]" "She didn't get that big part." "She give you any details?" "What happened?" "You know, I can hear you." "Your... your mom was just filling me in." "I'm fine, daddy." "I didn't get the lead, but it was a total long shot anyway." "I'm gonna be in the ensemble." "I'm so excited." "It's a workshop, so I'm..." "I'm getting in on the ground floor, and the people who are writing it are, like, the top New York composers." "It's... it's totally a huge opportunity." "So, what does this workshop pay?" "200 a week." "Will they hold your job for you while you do it?" "Roger!" "I got it, mom." "Thanks." "Daddy..." "I'm really glad to be here." "And tomorrow I'm going to marlena's baby shower and for two days, I'm not gonna even think about Broadway." "[Applause, jazz music]" "♪" "Bye, guys." "We'll be at vintage." "Bye, Luce." "It hasn't been that long." "It's been three days." "Three days isn't long." "Yeah, if you're in high school, and your boyfriend is an idiot." "The theater is high school, and directors are the biggest idiots out there." "Right." "Are you two trying to make me feel better or worse?" "Look, why don't you just call him?" "Because I don't want to be pushy." "Every time Marilyn tried to be pushy, it backfired." "Marilyn was famous for knowing how to dial a phone." "What do you think it means that we never go to his place?" "Why don't you ask him?" "Why don't you just call Derek?" "I'm getting a call?" "What for?" "You've already got the part." "Derek, what're you doing here?" "Well, that's nice, I can go." " No, no, no." " See ya, Ivy." "We're outta here." "Mm-hmm." "I saw the show tonight." "You were terrific." "I look like a duck in that costume." "Mm." "A very fetching duck." "[Laughs]" "[Muffled laughter]" "[Moans]" "What's that?" "Julia's notebook." "Julia's notebook?" "What are you doing with it?" "I took it." "You took it?" "Well, you gave me the idea." "I did not." "Okay, you said they should be paying me, and they should." "And they're not." "That Julia has it in for me." "Seriously, she's a problem, and I'm not just gonna lie down for it." "I'm allowed to defend myself, right?" "By stealing from her?" "I'm gonna give it back." "I never said I wasn't gonna give it back," "I just want to see if there's anything interesting." "Is there?" "Mostly song lyrics, but..." "Hang on." "What?" "Uh..." "I wanna see it." "You little spy." "Oh, I'm a spy now." "You're a secret agent." " That's right I am." " [Laughs]" " He's so beautiful." " I know." "I just want to be a great father." "Theater's so irresponsible, and..." "I need to support us." "I need to support him." "You need to be the best man that you can be." "I think that Artie would love to see his dad play Joe DiMaggio." "Even for $200 a week." "[Sighs]" "[Sighs]" "Michael." "Julia, hi." "I didn't expect to see you here." "Likewise." "Um, I wanted to talk Eileen through the new outline." "She's not in yet." "Oh, um..." "Would you mind giving this to her, please?" "I'll put it right on her desk." "Thanks." "Show's great." "Well, it's not really a show yet." "It's just a concept and a few songs." "It's more than that." "I think what you have is terrific." "I'm in." "Wow." "Uh... that's great." "When we didn't hear from you right away," "I-I-I thought that you might pass." "Yeah, I thought I might too." "How's Frank?" " He's great." " And Leo?" "He's great too." "[Laughs]" " I got married." " I heard." "Yeah." "I have a kid." "Wow, that's..." "That's great." "[Elevator dings] You smell good." "See you in rehearsal." "Yeah." "[Soft piano music, quiet chatter]" "♪" " Excuse me, Mrs. Rand." " Yes." "A gentleman at the bar sent this over for you." "Ooh." "Someone at the bar sent me this?" "And he also thought you would like this." "It's a Manhattan." "It's for throwing." "I'm meeting someone, Jerry." "Manny Azenberg." "I bumped into him this afternoon." "He told me you were having dinner to talk about this "Marilyn" thing." "I said there had to be some mistake, because you and I were having dinner." "Oh, for goodness sake." "Eileen." "Have dinner with me." "I'm not having dinner with you." " You're divorcing me." " You're divorcing me." "Yes, I am." "Go back to your blondes." "Oh, they're boring." "They all blend together." "You never do." "You like the earrings?" "They're lovely." "You have exquisite taste." "When you weren't cheating on me, it was one of the things I really enjoyed about you." "I saw them in the window of a little boutique in Soho." "[Sighs]" "They look so much like you." "Come here." " Don't even..." " Come here." "Try touching me." "Fine." "Look, Manny is, in fact, interested in Marilyn." "He's ready to come in." "[Laughs] He hasn't even seen the specs." "I was gonna walk him through them tonight." "Eileen, I talked to him." "He's in." "Oh, for crying out loud." "What do you think you're doing?" "I think I'm helping you get your musical produced." "That's what I thought you thought you were doing, but you know what?" "That's not what you're doing." "One of the last great theater producers has signed on to your little... musical." "Because of me." "You know those earrings you made fun of?" "Well, clearly you thought someone else had bought them for me." "And that's what pissed you off." "And that's what this is all about." "Mm... come on." "I bought them myself, Jerry." "I bought those earrings for myself." "And you know what?" "This is my musical, and I am producing it by myself." "[Clears throat]" "This is great." "I didn't even know it was back here." "And the food is amazing." "So, how are things at Heaven on earth?" "Fine." "Terrific." "It's such a fun show to do every night." "I know your contract is coming up." "Well, yeah." "Unfortunately, I don't have a clue about the running costs, so I don't know what they're gonna be offering by way of a bump." "But I know everyone wants you to stay, and hopes you will stay." "I-I don't need a..." "That's not why I asked you to lunch." "It's not?" "No." "Actually, I was..." "I was asking you on a date." "A date." "Yes." "I was feeling kind of shy about it." "But Ivy..." "You know, she told me to go for it." "And I thought, "why not?"" "She's dating Derek Wills." "Why shouldn't I..." "Ivy is dating Derek Wills?" "It's not actually a secret." "They're having sex in the dressing room." "Really?" "It is completely unethical." "People have sex all the time, Tom." "It is hardly considered unethical." "He is taking advantage of her." "Maybe Ivy's taking advantage of him." "She did get the part." "She got the part because she was fantastic." "And sleeping with the director probably didn't hurt either." "[Scoffs] That's ridiculous." "And by the way, it proves my point." "I don't think it does." "It's show business." "In shows, people..." "They sleep together." "It happens." "It just happens." "So, you don't care." "Of course I care." "I guess I just don't judge." "[Scoffs] Well..." "I do!" "Oh, come on." "Don't walk away." "Come on!" "Tom!" " Hi." " Oh, Ellis..." "I didn't know that you were here." "I was just straightening up." "He sounds really upset." " Yes, he is." "Excuse me." " Can I just..." "I'm sorry." "What is it?" "I just feel like maybe you should give him a little space right now." "Well, I think that I don't need Tom's assistant explaining to me how to handle him." "You know what?" "I'm gonna get you a cup of tea." "No, I don't need you to make me a cup of tea." "What I really need..." "Actually, you know what I need?" "Is for you to go." "Can you go?" "Tom is upset, and he and I have a few things that we need to work out, and we're gonna need privacy to do it." "But I don't work for you." "I work for Tom." "You can't actually just order me to leave his apartment because I don't work for you." "Listen..." "You should be careful about what you say next." "You have a real problem with your temper, you know that?" "I fired you once." "I can do it again." "You can sure try." "And then we'll see if it sticks, because it kinda didn't the last time." "Did it?" "I'm really glad we cleared the air." "Oh, and you know what?" "I found your notebook." "It was underneath Tom's mail, and he looked all over for it." "And I knew you were really worried about it, so..." " Thanks." " You're welcome." " Oh, my God, there she is." " Oh, my God!" "Hi!" "Karen Cartwright, Broadway baby!" "Excuse me." "[Laughter]" "Sorry." " Hi!" " Hi!" "Thank you." "Oh, baby." "My baby." "[Laughs]" " Hi." " Amy." "You look so pretty." "Oh, my gosh." "That was a fast one you pulled on me, Manny." "Standing me up yesterday." "Jerry wants something, he can be pretty persuasive." "Yes, well, we're here now." "Let me run you through this." "Our Marilyn is a terrific musical theater actress by the name of Ivy Lynn." "She's a completely thrilling talent." " She did a year in wicked." " Yeah." "I heard you're going to do this without a star." "Well, I'm glad to hear people are talking about us." "Who'd you hear that from, Manny?" "Who do you think?" "Let me run you through this." "Jerry already did." "Jerry isn't producing this with me." "Well, when he is, let me know." "[Clears throat] No disrespect, Eileen." "But I'm just more comfortable dealing with him on the business side." "He wants to support you?" "Your boyfriend sounds awesome." "He is awesome, but I don't want him supporting me." "You know, feminism's overrated." " What does that mean?" " It means don't be an idiot." "It is awesome your boyfriend wants to support you." "And half our class is already married." "It's a pretty good deal." "This is adorable!" "Oh, my God, the baby's gonna love this." "It's for you, actually." "Really?" "For me?" "You're having a baby." "It's a big commitment." "You're gonna need a friend, so you..." "Hug him, and call me." "Oh..." "You know nothing about having babies, and you're gonna be totally useless." " [Laughs]" " That's true." "[Gasps] Time for some karaoke!" "Hey, Broadway!" " No." " You wanna give me a present?" "Get up there and sing." "Come on, come on, come on." "I just gave you a present." " You always..." " Come on." "Hurry, hurry." "Do I even get to pick my own song this time?" "Oh, it's my shower, you sing my song." " No." " Yes!" "Oh, great." "Like I've never sung this one before." "I love when you sing this song." "Ugh..." " Can I eat that?" " Thanks." "♪ Well, I ain't never" " Yes!" " Whoo!" "♪ Been the Barbie doll type Yeah!" "♪ No, I can't swig" "♪ that chic champagne" "♪ I'd rather drink beer all night ♪" "♪ in a tavern, or in a honky tonk ♪" "♪ or on a four-wheel drive tailgate ♪" "♪ I've got posters on my wall ♪" "♪ of skynyrd, kid, and strait ♪" "♪ some people look down on me ♪" "♪ but I don't give a rip" "♪ I'll stand barefooted" "♪ in my own front yard with a baby on my hip ♪" "♪ 'cause I'm a redneck woman ♪" "♪ I ain't no high-class broad ♪" "♪ I'm just a product of my raisin' ♪" "♪ I say, "hey, y'all," and "yee haw" ♪" "♪ and I keep my Christmas lights on ♪" "♪ on my front porch all year long ♪" "♪ and I know all the words" "♪ to every Tanya Tucker song ♪" "♪ so here's to all my sisters out there ♪" "♪ keepin' it country" "♪ and let me get a big "hell yeah" ♪" "♪ from the redneck girls like me ♪" "♪ hell yeah all:" "Hell yeah!" "Come on!" "Get up here, you guys!" "♪" "♪ hey, I'm a redneck woman" "♪ I ain't no high-class broad ♪" "♪ I'm just a product of my raisin' ♪" "♪ and I say, "hey, y'all," and "yee haw" ♪" "♪ I keep my Christmas lights on ♪" "♪ on my front porch all year long ♪" "♪ and I know all the words" "♪ to every ol' bocephus song ♪" "♪ so here's to all my sisters out there ♪" "♪ keepin' it country" "♪ let me get a big "hell yeah" ♪" "♪ from the redneck girls like me ♪" "All:" "Hell yeah!" " ♪ I said hell yeah - hell yeah!" " ♪ I said hell yeah..." " Hell yeah!" "♪ Yeah... ♪ Oh, yes..." "[Cheers and applause]" "Thank you." "All right." "All right, who's next?" "Derek, can I..." "Can I ask you a question?" "Sure." "Why don't we ever go to your place?" "Oh, God." "What?" "Uh, it's ridiculous, really." "Um..." "[Inhales]" "My neighbors on the floor below, um, they've just installed a new stove." " Stove." " Yeah." "You know, one of those giant things." "You know, it takes up half a room." "It's so big, it has to have entirely new gas pipes, so they've turned off the gas, and now they've broken the gas, and now I have no gas." "[Laughs]" "You can laugh." "But the whole building's a wreck." "My kitchen's a disaster area." "I can't even boil an egg." " No... [laughs]" " It's not funny." "No, no, I just..." "I thought you didn't want me in your home or something." "Darling." "I want you everywhere." "[Giggles]" "So, no worries, all right?" "[Sighs]" "[Plays piano softly]" "♪" "♪ nothing can beat the view ♪" "♪ when as far..." "Both: ♪ as the eye can see" "♪ there's... ♪ No one but Mr." "♪ No one but Mrs." "Both: ♪ Smith and..." "I'm sorry we got into a fight." "Me too." "I've got to tell you something." "No, it's okay." "I know I'm uptight about Derek, and I need to relax." "No." "Well, yes." "That's true." "But I've got to tell you something else." "Just the history with him is so terrible, and I just..." "I love Ivy so much..." "I had an affair with Michael swift." "Five years ago." "When we were working ready money." "I..." "We..." "Had a really..." "And it lasted for a while." "And it was really..." "And I didn't tell you." "And I didn't tell anyone, actually." " Frank doesn't know?" " No one knows." "Never should've happened." "How did it happen?" "Michael is just..." "He was so good in our show." "And you know what a huge turn-on that is, when someone is just so great in your show." "Yes." "That's all it was." "It was just..." "A show crush." "But then..." "I was down at city hall, and I was gonna walk home over the Brooklyn bridge, and we bumped into each other." "[Soft piano music]" "♪" " The Brooklyn bridge." " Right." "Right?" "[Chuckles] Oh, sweetie." "[Sighs] Oh, God." "It's over." "It's been over for a while." "I just..." "Need to help me not go back there." " Mm-hmm." " And..." "No one else can know." "[Sighs]" "[Laughs]" "[Acoustic guitar music]" "♪" "Girls are coming to pick you up?" "Yeah, they're taking me to the airport." "Listen, uh, Karen." " Dad, I..." " I wanted to talk to..." " Now, hear me out." " No, you hear me out." "I'm fine." "I'm great." "Do you know that even being in the chorus of a workshop is so much bigger than so many people ever get to do?" "This is good, what's happening to me." "It's good." "I'm good." "I know, I..." "I just, uh..." "Want to give you this." " Oh, dad, I..." " I'm your dad." "I got..." "I gotta help out." "Once in a while, you gotta let me, huh?" "[Sniffs]" "You smell like smoke." "Why do you smell like smoke?" "I don't know." "He missed church this morning, too." "Apparently, he was out late last night." "♪ I'm a redneck woman" "You were there?" "Well, I didn't want to miss my chance to..." "[Laughs]" "I haven't heard you sing in so long." "You're really good." "[Car horn honks]" "Come on, Broadway baby!" "Got to get you back to the big time." " Oh, yeah." " Whoo-hoo!" "Okay." "Thanks." "Go on." "Go." " By mom." " Love you." "I love you too." " Hi." " Hello." "♪ Call the justice of the peace ♪" "♪ but don't tell him our names ♪" "♪ don't put out a press release ♪" "♪ or mention baseball games ♪" "♪ book the nearest bridal suite ♪" "♪ one room will suit us fine ♪" "♪ for the desk clerk that we meet ♪" "♪ the only autograph we'll sign is... ♪" "Both:" "♪ Mr. and Mrs. Smith" "♪ simply the folks next door ♪" "♪ people without a single clue what ♪" "♪ an agent or grip is for both: ♪ nothing can beat the view ♪" "♪ when as far as the eye can see ♪" "♪ there's no one but Mrs." "♪ No one but Mr." "Both: ♪ Smith and me" "♪" "♪ for a home the man provides ♪" "♪ that cottage built for two ♪" "♪ we'll check the small town classifieds ♪" "♪ Variety won't do ♪" "♪ then we'll move to main street, U.S.A. ♪" "♪ and sign the deed of trust ♪" "♪ the mailbox at our hideaway ♪" "♪ will tell the whole wide world that we're just ♪" "Both:" "♪ Mr. and Mrs. Smith" "♪ merely the folks next door ♪" "♪ people who use their kitchen each night ♪" "♪ who've never been in toots shor ♪" "Yeah." "Both: ♪ nothing can beat the view ♪" "♪ for as far as the eye can see there's ♪" "♪ no one but Mrs." "♪ No one but Mr." "Both: ♪ Smith and me" "♪ no early calls" "♪ no big premieres" "♪ no lush romantic theme" "♪ we'll spend the nights" "♪ making our own" "♪ little league baseball team... ♪" "♪" "♪ we're no one you've ever seen ♪" "♪ movie stars don't live anywhere here ♪" "♪ except on the local drive-in screen ♪" "♪ yes, I'd gladly disappear ♪" "♪ if it might guarantee a view of ♪" "♪ no one but Mr." "♪ No one but Mrs." "Both: ♪ Smith and you" "♪"