" Is that the new Mandros?" "Yes, darling." " Can I see them?" " I've got to mail them before 5:00." "Did Mandro find the Princess?" "Not yet." "Next week." "What happened to the Evil Monk?" "I'll tell you the whole story tonight." "I promise." "Away you go." " How did it go?" " Another week." "We've got drinks with the Ryders at 6:00, right?" "Mmm-hmm." "Aren't you looking forward to it?" "You and Charlie just basically talk about your work and Kate and I just sort of listen." " I thought you liked to listen." " I do." "Those real estate people called." "There's a furnished sublet on 6th and 11th that sounds perfect." " Oh, how much?" " It's only $350 a month." "There must be something wrong with it." "Why do you always say things like that?" "It's just the thought of spending the winter in New York that's depressing." "We've already talked about all of this." "I've already been looking into schools for Lizzie and everything." "Well, maybe Lizzie should wait another year." "Look, I'm not trying to get out of it." "Anyway, I've gotta mail these to Karen." "Yeah, but the thing is that if we want to have the apartment, then we've got to give them a deposit over the weekend." "Without even seeing it?" "Tamara Willard saw it and she says that it's a steal." "It's not gonna be there Monday." "You really want this place, don't you?" "It's just that there are so many other things I want to do in New York." "You know." " Like joining the Origin Institute?" " That's one of them, yes." "You mean you want to take a course in Creative Living?" "I want to do something on my own." "I know." "Daddy, look." "How does the lizard know I'm doing that when there's no head?" "It doesn't know, darling." "It's just a reflex." "It moves quick when I put the stick near it." "You see?" "It knows." "Amanda." "I don't really think it was alive." " Come on." " I do." "Tell me about the apartment." "What did Tamara Willard say?" "Well, it's not too big." "In fact, she said it's kind of small." "How small?" "Living room, kitchen, bedroom." "Oh." "Where am I supposed to work?" "Anne?" "I thought you wanted to stay up here and work in the studio and come into the city a couple of days a week." "Stay here alone?" "But you said you did." "You told me several times that you'd never spend another winter in New York again." " I assumed you meant that." " You meant that's what you wanted." "You don't want me to go to New York with you, do you?" "That's not true." "That's not true at all." "What is then?" "Huh?" "Look out!" "Watch her!" " I see her." " Watch her!" " I see her!" "Get back, you silly cow!" "Jesus." "What is then?" "What is true?" " Well, I assumed..." " You assumed." "I assumed you meant that it might be all right if we were by ourselves for a while and did some thinking." "Thinking?" "About what?" "About our marriage." "Well, what about it?" " What's wrong with it?" " I don't know what's wrong." "I just think that it needs to be..." "To be reevaluated, reappreciated." "Oh." "With you in New York and me in Vermont, right?" "I'm not talking about a separation or anything permanent, or anything like that." "I just felt that we should be on our own for a while." "I thought you understood that." "I thought that was why you said that I could..." "Well, we obviously do not understand each other!" "There is no way I'm going to let you traipse off to New York with Lizzie leaving me here alone to pay the bills!" "No way!" "So you can forget that right now!" " Then I'll go anyway." " You'll what?" "Look out!" "Get back!" "Get back!" "Jon!" "Jon!" "Oh, Jesus, lady." "I'm gonna be holding him." "Hold still." "I think it..." "I think it stopped." "Tender?" "No." "There?" "We'll leave the dressing off from now on." "Try this exercise with your wrist." "Like you're twisting a corkscrew." "That's it." "How does it feel?" "Like they're still there, my fingers." "Like they're moving." "I feel them." "Well, that's quite normal." "You'll have phantom feelings for years." "Heat, cold, irritation, pain." "Your memory is still feeding familiar sensations of having a hand along your nerve endings." "You'll never quite get over that feeling." "I'll make an appointment for you in New York with a good prosthetic man." "He'll be working with you on a weekly basis." "Okay." "It must be awful, Daddy" "It was just one of those things, a freak accident." ""Freak"?" "Weird." "Unusual." "Sophie said, on TV, there was this hand and they sewed it back on this little boy." "But you have to find the hand right away to do that." "What happened to the hand?" "Mommy went to look for it, but it ran away." "Bedtime, honey." "Good night, darling." "God bless." "I'm glad you did that." "Showed her your hand, your wrist." "Well, she's got to see it sooner or later." "But it was good the way you did it." "Are you looking forward to New York?" "Yeah, very much." "I can't wait for you to see the loft." "It's so much prettier than the other place ever could have been." "Don't." "It's all right." "Anne." "It's so ugly." "I imagine if anybody has found it by now," " they'd have called the police." " Why?" "Well, wouldn't you, if you found part of a human body?" "I shouldn't think there's much left of it with all those birds, rodents, insects." "There's everything out there in that field." "It's probably just a few old bones by now." " I found my signet ring." "That was there." " You never liked that ring." "That's not true." "I wore that a long time." "You told me you only wore it 'cause Anne gave it to you and you felt guilty about it." "Jesus Christ, don't start that again." "You know you never liked her." "I was talking to Norman Kaufman about you." "Yeah?" "What's there to talk about?" "Well, he thinks the strip should go on." "It was never a blockbuster, but it did very well, especially out West." "Oh, yes, I am very big in the Sacramento Bee" "When I was in the hospital, the President of this community college in Northern California called me and he asked me to go out and teach." "Sounds interesting." "I've always wanted to live in California." "Norman Kaufman thinks the strip should go on." " Well, that's impossible." " You wouldn't have to do it yourself." "You could do the continuity, dialogue, rough out the action." "Somebody else could do the finished artwork." "It'd be a bit of a dead end, wouldn't it, for anyone taking it over?" "It wouldn't be easy to find the right person." "There's this young man, David Maddow." "He used to do underground comics." "He loves Mandro" "Thinks it's as good as anything Kelly or Feiffer ever did." "Maybe you could do him a plot line and he could do some test boards?" "I don't know, Karen." "I just hadn't thought of it." "Here, try this." "It's absolutely delicious." " Is everything all right?" " Fine." " May I bring you anything else?" " Maybe some more white." "More white." "It takes time to get used to things, the doctor said." "For the patient to understand that he's changed forever." "I mean, he's..." "He's lost a limb." "Jon, the reason you're hesitant about Mandro, about starting it up again, is because you know the moment you start earning a living," " the moment you're back on your feet..." " I don't know anything." "...Anne will leave you." "I'm sorry." "I just don't like what she's doing to you." "Okay, that's fine, Karen." "That is fine." "Thank you." "Breathe Drop the ribcage" "Yes." "Straight spine, guys." "Feel the energy coming up from the soles of your feet, bring your foot out to here, out to here, and drop the hip, drop the hip." "Good." "Nice." "Okay, up through the kneecaps, up the spine, out through the crown of the head." "Bring this kneecap up, would you, please?" "That's nice." "And inhale, other side." "Did I hear "ow"?" "I think I heard "ow."" "Did I hear "ow"?" "That's nice." "Yoga is not "ow." Yoga is "ah!" All right, breathe." "This is very nice, Ms. Fontaine, but it's not yoga." "Extend the fingers, all right?" "All right, keep the thumbs apart and tuck this." "Okay, guys, inhale, other side." "That's it." "That's it." "Okay, let's all do the sun salutation together." "Feet together." "And one, two, three, freeze." "You know, you could have been a little nicer to Bill." "He's not all that stupid." "God bless you." " Who?" " Bill." "Bill Richman, my teacher." "Do you know that he's traveled all over the world?" "Incredible places like Turkey and Australia." "He's got a degree in Psychology and he's going for his Master's." "You sound like you're coming down with a cold." "I don't know." "Tell me, how did the meeting go with Karen Wagner?" "Fine." "She wants me to meet my replacement." "A replacement?" "What does she have in mind?" "Did you see my signet ring?" "No." "It was in here." "Well, I haven't touched your things." "Are you all right?" "Yeah." "Maybe Lizzie." "Maybe she took it." "Why don't you ask her in the morning?" "I can never find anything in this bloody place." "And why is it always so cold?" "Darling?" "Mmm-hmm." "Do you remember what Dr. Silverman said about going into analysis?" "We can't afford it." "But it's so much more important than the money." "And I was thinking that if I saved on some things, then..." "If you think I'm gonna pay some parasite $100 an hour to listen to me rattle on about my experiences in my mother's womb, you're crazy." "After $1,000, he'll probably tell me I have a penis complex because I lost my hand, and after $10,000, he'll probably tell me I'm sane again." "No doubt we're all crazy in some ways, believe me, but that doesn't mean we have to go parading out our psychosis to some other psychotic just because he has a white coat and a degree, does it?" "Those bastards." "They just love to prey on our insecurities." "And if we didn't have them, they'd create them." "We can do other things with the money." "What is it?" "Sorry." " It'll smart." " It does." " It feels comfortable now, though?" " Yeah, it's okay." "Go ahead." " Do you want to try the harness?" " Yeah." "How does that feel?" "Seems comfortable?" " Yes, fine." " It's not binding anywhere?" " No, it's okay." " Okay." "Now, let me see if you can clench your fingers." " How do I do that?" " Extend your arm forward." "Yeah." "See, the more tension you exert here, the tighter the grip." "Yeah." " Good." " Good." "How strong is it?" "Here, put your hand in there like that and make a fist." " That's powerful." " Yes, it is." "With practice, you'll be able to pick up surprisingly small objects." "Drawing?" "Buttoning your shirt, changing razor blades, catching flies." "Just depends on what you want to do with your hand." "Drawing?" "And now the glove." "You can change it every month, month-and-a-half." "Well, you know, it just depends on you." "Your own personal taste." "Okay." "Clench your fingers." "Good." "Good." " Here you go." " Thank you." "So what do you think?" "Well, they're interesting, but they're not Mandro." "Well, it's not exactly your style, but this is very good." "All my enemies reincarnated." "Do you really think Mandro believes in crap like that?" "Well, there's a lot of scientific research being done" " on the possibility that reincarnation..." " He's even changed my outline." "Look." "These hallucinations." "Well, maybe he thought that it needed changing." "That's not what he was hired for!" "He was told to draw what I wrote!" "I can't talk to you if you're gonna shout at me." "I am not shouting at you." "I'm shouting at him." "Maddox." "I mean, this isn't Mandro." "This is some character he's made up." "But if he's gonna take over the strip..." " He is not supposed to take over the strip!" " Why don't you let him?" "Because I invented Mandro!" "I have lived with him for 10 years." "He is mine!" "I created him!" " That doesn't mean you can't give him up." " Give him up?" "Why should I?" "Because you'll get a good income out of it and we won't have to worry about Lizzie or the rent, or what we're gonna do after Christmas." "It's all right." "I'll phone Karen." "I'll see." "His style is original, different from mine, but interesting." "Thanks." "I'm glad you like it." "What did you think of the storyline?" "Why did you change it?" "Well, I didn't really change it." "I just sort of brought it up to date a little bit." "Oh?" "How?" "Well, what would you say was the point of your outline?" "The return of his queen." "His queen has been kidnapped." "Mandro goes to look for her." "That's it." "It's simple." "Not reincarnation." "Not left to stand here facing all eternity alone." "Not what you did to my character." " What did I do with your character?" " You weakened him." "How?" "By making him look too deep inside himself, making him too self-conscious." "That's not Mandro." "Mandro knows what he wants." "Mandro doesn't think." "You drew all those little fucking bubbles with him thinking." "Maybe Mandro should change a little bit, begin to explore himself, ask questions." "Oh, yes." "I've been told." "But you don't cut the balls off Superman." "It's not cutting the balls off of him." "It's the same thing Walt Kelly did with Pogo" "Mandro isn't Pogo." "No, but he could be." "The market is there." "Do you have any idea how many copies a book like Watson's Supernature has sold?" "That's what Norman Kaufman thinks, too, Jon." "He likes David's approach to the strip." "He thinks..." "You think I should leave this whole thing to you two, don't you?" "You think I should just sit here and take my piece of the action." "No, of course not, Jon." "I think we should take a look at David's boards, and if there's anything in particular you object to," "I'm sure David will be more than willing to..." "That's fine with me." "Jon!" "What is this?" "How could you?" "That's not Mandro" "Mandro doesn't think" "You drew all those little fucking bubbles with him thinking" " Hey." " Sorry." "Excuse me." "Hey, what is that?" " Wait." " Leave me alone." " You got no hand." " Let go of me." " Come on." " People like you should be..." " Who do you think you are, anyway?" " Bastards!" " The likes of you, bloody scum." " You think you're better than me?" " You'll see, you fucking dick." " Get out of here!" " Get lost!" " You shithead!" " Fucking bastard!" " Fuck off!" "Fuck you!" "That son of a bitch." "Shithead." "But you don't cut the balls off Superman" "It's not cutting the balls off of him" "It's the same thing Walt Kelly did with Pogo." "Maybe Mandro should change a little bit, begin to explore himself, ask questions" "Do you have any idea how many copies a book like Watson's Supernature has sold?" "Why?" "Why did you do it, then?" "Why?" "Why, Annie?" "Why did you do it?" "It's all right." "You're safe now." "You can talk." "You can tell the truth." "It's okay, Annie." "It's okay." " Hi, Daddy." " Hi, darling." "Tell me, did you see those drawings on my table last night?" " In the green envelope?" " Yeah." " What did you think of them?" " I didn't like them." " Why not?" " He made Mandro different." "Lizzie?" " Please listen to me." " I am listening." "Did you know I didn't like them?" " Did you hear Mommy and me talking?" " Yes." "Did you..." "Did you touch them?" "No." "What happened?" "Oh, the meeting?" "It was cut short." "Where is he?" "He just left." "Why were you crying?" " We were counseling." " Yes, I know that." "What was it you were remembering?" "I can't tell you." "You see, you're not supposed to talk about it afterwards." "What happened at the meeting?" "We decided to call the whole thing off." "The strip?" "Why?" "'Cause I can't get along with Maggot." "Maddox." "He's an arrogant little shit." "Well, is Karen gonna get you something else, then?" "Oh, no, I don't think so." "As a matter of fact," "I don't think Karen is ever gonna do anything for me ever again." "Why not?" "We're not supposed to talk about it afterwards." "What are we gonna do for money?" "I'll get a job." "Teaching." "Where?" "California." "Somewhere far away." " Isn't that a little sudden?" " No." "I've been offered a very good job in California." " Lizzie." " Yes, Mommy." "Come on, honey, time for our bath." "We got you a car and a house back in the woods that belongs to the college." "The rent's free." "Why not get a place in town?" "I don't think you'd want to stay there." "The hotel is ratty." " Are you associated with the college?" " Teacher." " What do you teach?" " Psychology." "Anything I can get 15 jerkoffs a year to enroll for." "One time I even taught bomb shelter management." "Don't laugh." "I think it's coming back." "Hammond told me you get paid by the course." "You've got to get 15 kids to put their names down." "Yeah." "Only after the first few classes, don't keep any attendance records." "The State refunds the college for each student." "You should be okay." "The kids have heard of you." "They used to follow that strip of yours." "Big culture hero." "Jon Lansdale." "I am very happy to be here in Saraville and I very much look forward to working with you all this semester" "It's going to take me a little time to get all your names, but..." "Why don't we go around the room and each one of you tell me a little bit about yourselves." "I imagine you all have your favorite comic strips." "Why don't we talk about them?" "Okay?" "We'll start with you." " What's your name?" " Billy Jenkins." "Okay." "All right, now, do you like comic strips, Billy?" " Yeah." " Which is your favorite?" "Do you have a favorite comic strip, Billy?" "No." "I see." " And you, young lady?" " Huh?" " Do you have a favorite comic strip?" " No." "Hello, Daddy" "Hi, darling How are you?" " Fine." " I miss you" " I miss you, too." " I love you" " I love you." " Mommy wants to talk to you." " Okay" "Hello." "Jon?" " Anne?" " How are you?" "Is everything all right?" "Yeah, everything's fine." "The countryside here is lovely." "Lizzie will really like it." "The house is a..." "It's a bit depressing, but we'll find another one when you get out here." "When are you" "Well, it seems awfully silly when we have to..." "When?" "When are you coming out here?" "It seems silly when we have to give up the loft anyway at Christmas." "Christmas?" "But that's two months away." "I know that, but" "Jon, Lizzie likes this school and she's made a friend here" "It is what we've been talking about, isn't it?" "I mean, it would be the perfect chance for us to be alone for a bit by ourselves" "It would be good for you, too" "I mean, you ought to go out and see people" "It would be different" "We would both grow as people" "Yeah." "And we have the phone We have the phone" "Do you think you'll be all right?" "Oh, yeah." "I'll be all right." "Don't worry." "Lizzie misses you very much She talks about you all the time" "Yeah." "I miss her, too." " Give her a kiss for me, will you?" " Of course" "Well..." "We'll talk." "Anger." "Mandro has changed minimally." "But the face on the right is now employing a new element, displaying violent emotion in a simple way, bared teeth." "In this manner, we have displayed the entire series of emotions with a minimum of expressive lines." "So..." "That will be all for today." "I have graded your sketchbooks." "Please pick them up on the way out." "Hi." "Hi." "Come in." "So I..." "I thought you want this back." " Did you just do these?" " In class, you've seen them all before." "Would you like a drink of something?" "Coffee?" " You got a beer?" " Yeah." "So, you think I'll ever make a cartoonist?" "You might." "The only class I was any good at was bookkeeping." " What's wrong with that?" " I'll take it from the can." "Well, who wants to be a bookkeeper?" "What do you want to be?" "I don't know." "I suppose that's why I picked this place, you know." "You never have to graduate." "None of that shit about having to make it in the world." "You can't keep taking courses for the rest of your life." "I don't want to do anything the rest of my life." "I've seen you with Brian." "Yeah." "He's dying to fuck me." "I never let him." "It drives him crazy." "He's always doing this number." "Walks around, hiking up his pants to show me how big he is." "He's so stuck on himself, you know." "Never looks at my ass." "With you it's different." "I like the way you look at me." "I feel like it's me you're looking at." "I'm kind of old-fashioned." "I like to make it in bed." "Okay?" "Okay." "You can leave it on." "It doesn't bother me." "Go on." "Do it." "Just don't hold off, okay?" "Go on." "Do it." "I'll give you a ride into town." "It wouldn't be cool." "You want me to come back sometime?" " Tomorrow?" " Okay." " Bye." " Bye." "Trauma." "A shock of some kind might cause it." "A hockey player gets cracked in the head, goes to the locker room, showers, changes, eats, finds himself driving home." "He can't even remember who won the game." " What sort of trauma?" " A thing like that might start it." "What have you been doing during these black outs?" "Misplacing things." "Finding them again." "My signet ring." " What else?" " Drawings." "I found this drawing and I don't remember doing it." " Was it obscene?" " Yeah." "Maybe you were tired and some automatic pilot took over." "No, I could never do work like that with my left hand." "This was like the work I used to do with my right hand." "You never know what you can do." "The unconscious is capable of anything." "Like what?" "A guy under hypnosis." "One subject spoke fluent German." "Never spoke a word of it before in his life." " We did experiments like that at Berkeley." " I see." "You think maybe I blacked out and switched hands." "Maybe." "Or maybe your prosthetic hand was receiving some fast impulses from your brain and was repeating a trance pattern" "But you can't do it when you're conscious." "No." "I'd be scared shitless, if I were you." " Why?" " Black outs are nothing to fool with." "All I did was a drawing." "How do you know that's all you did?" " Have you ever been drunk?" " Yeah." "Really drunk?" "I mean, you don't really remember what you did." "If you shouted some obscenity in the street or picked a fight with some innocent guy because he had a way with the women." "So you're saying that I could black out and rape somebody?" "You think rape's bad." "Man, you could kill somebody." "Shit, man, you could do anything you've ever dreamed of and never had the guts to do." "It's all up there and you'll never know." " Know what?" " Who you are." "Who the fuck you really are." "Stella." "Stella." "Excuse me." " Can you come to my place tonight?" " No, I'm..." "See you soon." "When is she coming?" "Tomorrow, in the afternoon." "How long for?" "I don't know." "She didn't say." "How about you?" "What are you gonna do for Christmas?" "Fuck Christmas." "I was thinking of going to LA." "Do you have friends there?" "Yeah, I have friends." "I gotta be going." "Why?" "I have to be at the supermarket." "Tonight?" "It's Wednesday." "Stella." "I've got a present for you." " A present for me?" " Yeah, a present for you." " What is it?" " Open it and see." "What's the matter?" "Stella?" "Do you want me to come back?" " Can you?" " Yes." " What time do you get through?" " At 10.00." "Great." " I'll wear it when I come back, okay?" " Okay." "I'll be at the Last Chance." "I'll come and pick you up, okay?" "No, I have to stop home after working." "And I'll be up here at 11:00, okay?" " Can you try and come back earlier?" " Yeah." "Bye." "Hey, Mandro!" "What do you say to a drink?" "I'm celebrating." "Me, too." "Happy Christmas." "Fuck Christmas." "I'm getting out of these pits for two weeks." " Great." "Where are you going?" " LA." "What will it be, partner?" "Scotch rocks." " You got friends there?" " Sure." "Friends." "Motel manager." "Two weeks shacked up at the beach with 115 pounds of pussy." "You know, it's always been a dream of mine." "A place at the beach, plenty of beer and food, and I get to screw her night and day, any time I want." "Anybody from around here?" "Who do you mean?" "The girl you're shacking up with." " In LA." " Hell, you know her." "The stuck-up bitch who works at the supermarket, Stella Roche." "I'm taking her." "I guess she finally saw the light." "I'll tell you, if there's one bitch in this town who needs her chains pulled, it's her." "Two weeks in LA and she'II..." "Jon?" "Jon?" "It's a bit rundown." "It's all right." "I've only got it by the month, so we can get something better." "Jon?" "Just a minute." "Wait just a moment." "I've got a little surprise." "Okay." "The bedroom's upstairs." "Turn left and it's on the left." " Mommy, look at the tree." " Yes, it's lovely, darling." "Lovely." " I'll bring your other case up." " Okay." " Is this for me?" " What?" "Yes, it is." "You like that?" "It's very pretty, but..." "What made you think of this, of all things?" "I..." "I thought you'd like that." " Have you been getting a girl in?" " No." "Why?" "I thought maybe one of your students could help out, or something." "No, I look after myself." "I've got plenty of time." "Don't you miss eating steak, darling?" "Uncle Bill says it's bad for you." "It makes you get angry at people." "And yourself, too." "What about protein?" "Well, there's a lot of protein in soybeans, lentils, cheese, all sorts of things." " You've given this up, too?" " It distorts things." "Yeah, I know." "Look, Jon, I came here to tell you something." "I..." "You never intended staying here, did you?" "You never even unpacked your other suitcase." "And you sent the rest of your stuff to San Francisco." "And that's where you're going to join him, isn't it?" " Who?" " Rickman!" "Bill Rickman!" " I wanted to tell you in my own way." " Tell me what?" "Something you parroted from some fucking textbook?" "All I had to do was to read his letter to you from San Francisco!" "You've torn open my mail and read this letter?" "Oh, yes. "My dearest, darling spirit."" "It sounds like a pile of shit, if you ask me!" "First of all, I am not joining him." "The Origin Institute is opening up a new branch." "They've offered me a job." "Bill Richman will be one of the group leaders." "Yeah." "But you wouldn't accept me, would you?" "You'd accept him, but you wouldn't accept me!" "What are you talking about?" "You've never been interested in any of the things we were trying to do." "He's been living in that loft with you, hasn't he?" "No, not living." " What do you mean, not living?" " Just that." " Why don't you answer the question?" " Not in that tone of voice." "All right, then, I'll ask it in another tone." "Has he been fucking you?" "I don't think that's any of your business." "What do you mean, it's none of my business?" "What do you mean?" "You're my wife." "You are the mother of my child." "I love you." "I love you." "You love me?" "I don't think so." "You loved your work." "You loved Mandro." "You love Lizzie, but I don't think you ever loved me." "Oh, and he does, does he?" "Bill Rickman does?" "Yes." "Bill Richman does." "So you have been sleeping with him, haven't you?" "Yes!" "And I like him." "He's helped me to grow, to think, to feel." "He's opened up new worlds for me." "You're trying to kill me, aren't you?" "You want to destroy me." " What?" " You want to crush me." "You hate me, don't you?" "You've always hated me." "Jon, I think you're being a little paranoid." "Does Lizzie know you're sleeping with him?" "It would have been wrong to keep her out." "And you know what, Jon?" "She didn't think anything of it." "Children don't at that age." "They don't..." "Stop lecturing me, God damn you!" "Lizzie is my flesh and blood." "And I will never let you take her away from me!" "Never!" "Why don't we ask Lizzie?" "Because you have brainwashed her with your crap." "What does she know anymore?" "And you think that you're in the proper frame of mind to make a decision?" "She doesn't belong to you." "I think that at least..." "I think you should get out of here." "I think you should get out of this house." "Get out of my life." "Look, The Three Musketeers" "Thanks, Dad." " Can you read this to me tonight?" " Sure, darling." "Sure." "Wait a minute." "Hold everything." "Lizzie, you forgot one." "Now it's from me." "Yup." "I can't get the car started." "You have to start it in neutral, not park." "I already tried that." "There's a market open on Spruce Street." "Do you know where that is?" "Take a left on the main street past the hotel." "Okay." "What's that smell?" "What?" "I wish you weren't so angry with me, Jon." "I'm not trying to take Lizzie away from you." "I just don't think that the two of us can raise her together." "Not now." "And she honestly likes Bill, you know, but like an older brother, not like a father." "But he could never replace you in her mind." "Never." "I..." "Where's Mommy?" "She may have car trouble." "Are you hungry, darling?" "Yes, but I'm on a diet." "Can I go to exercise class, Daddy, like in New York with Uncle Bill?" "I don't see why not." "Good." "When?" "Well, when we see where we're going to be." "Where we're going to live." "But aren't I going to San Francisco with Mommy?" "Yes, yes, of course you are." "Why are you so hot?" "Double fives." "That's her now!" "Sit down." "It isn't Mommy." " But it's Mommy." "It's her car." " Lizzie, sit down." "It isn't her." " Now be calm and sit down!" " It's Mommy!" "Lizzie, come here." "It is not your mommy." "Mommy, he said it wasn't you." "What's going on?" "I thought something had happened to you." "Oh, well, the car stalled as soon as I got it into town, that's all." "I couldn't start it by myself." "I had to call the garage and have them help out." " You want to help me?" "Come on." " Yeah." "So what have you and Daddy been doing?" "Are you hungry?" "Hey, Lansdale." "What happened?" "I thought you were in LA." "No, she copped out on me." " She changed her mind?" " Yeah." "I reckon something happened that just made her change her mind." "Where is she?" "I reckon she went to LA." "I drove out to her place." "The landlady said the last time she saw her was after work on Wednesday night." "Her bike's gone." "She never went back to her room that night?" "Why the hell do you care?" "What?" " What happened to her?" " Did you ever fuck her?" "No, never." " I only saw her in class." " What?" "I only saw her in the classroom." "If only I could have seen her, man, I could have talked her into it." "I had the money." "Shit." "We could be in LA now." "We could be..." "You made her, didn't you?" "You were fucking her." "But it wasn't enough for you, was it?" "No, you had to go and talk her out of going to LA with me 'cause you didn't want anybody else to have her!" "I didn't even know she was going away with you!" "You're a fucking liar!" "I told you so myself!" "You told me in the Last Chance the night before you were leaving, and I never saw Stella again!" "I drove straight to Reno!" "That's where you took her?" "You took Stella there with you?" "No, I went alone!" "I booked into the motel." "The Holiday Inn." "You just call and check it out." "I registered in my own name." "Why?" "Why did you go to Reno alone?" "Well, because..." "Yeah?" "Well, she was at my place that afternoon and we had a date for that evening." "And then I saw you in the Last Chance and you told me you were gonna take Stella to LA." "I just didn't..." "I just didn't want to see her." "So I got in my car and I drove straight to Reno alone!" "Well, how the fuck do I know what you did?" "You said you were having black outs!" "You told me so yourself." "I'm going to the cops, man!" " Brian, wait!" "Please!" "Please, Brian, listen!" " Fuck you, man!" "I went straight back to..." "Save me..." "When are you getting out of here?" "I'm leaving in the morning." "Alone?" "I'm taking Lizzie." "No, you're not." "I don't think you have any choice." "Lizzie wants to come with me." "Ask her." "You're not taking her away from me." "You're not." "Mommy!" "Mommy!" "Leave her alone!" " Stop it, you're hurting Mommy!" " Well, no, no." "No, I'm not hurting her." "I'm helping her." "I heard her scream, I came into the room." "He was in here." "He came in through the window." " He's out there now." " Mama!" " Are you all right?" "Wake up." " I can see him." " Lizzie, call the police." " Mama, please answer me!" " Dial "O" for Operator if you can." " Mama!" "Quickly!" "Operator?" "You all right?" " I..." " You okay?" " Yeah, yeah." "I must have passed out." "You're Jon Lansdale?" "That's right." " Teacher up at the college?" " Yeah." "Yeah." "My wife, is she..." "Oh, she's..." "She'll be fine." "She'll be okay." "Good God!" "There was a prowler." " Did you see him?" " Yeah." "Kind of." "What's the matter?" "Why are you looking at me like that?" " Like what?" " Like that." " You sure you're all right?" "Hey, Jim." "Do you smell it?" "Yeah." "I sure do." "Whatever it is, it's coming from in here." "You got the keys?" " What?" " The keys to the trunk." "Oh, yeah." "Yeah." " Would you mind opening it?" " No." "What are you looking for?" "Well..." "It's been a strange kind of night." "Your wife's been attacked." "We found an abandoned car down the road tonight." "Oh?" "It belonged to Brian Ferguson." "Brian?" "What's he got to do with what's in there?" "Why don't you open it and we'll see?" " Why should I?" " Because if you don't, we will." "And what do you think you're gonna find?" "We don't know." "Whatever it is that's stinking up the place." "You think I've done something wrong, don't you?" "You think there's something in there, don't you?" "You're damn straight I do." "Well, you're full of shit!" "There's nothing in there!" "You want to see?" "Take a look!" "Jesus!" "That's him." "Who is the other one?" "It's the Roche girl." "Stella." "It's an old rage, Jon." "An ancient rage." "Brian was an accident." "Well, you didn't really mean to kill him." "It was a man." "But his actions were threatening." "He interfered with your will." "So, once again, instead of facing the feeling," "you blacked out." "Once again, you choose to eliminate someone else's life in order to fulfill your own." "You left the bar, you drove back to the house, exactly like you had done the night that you killed Stella." "This time you wanted to kill Anne because she had betrayed you." "Is that really true, Jon?" "I don't think you have any choice She wants to come with me Ask her" "Is that really true?" "It was Lizzie that saved you." "Leave her alone!" "Some primitive, God-like power." "Love, Jon, love..." "Stop it, you're hurting Mommy!" "...brought you to consciousness." "Jon." "You ran, Jon." "You ran to the garage, ashamed of yourself, looking for this hand, wanting to destroy it forever, this evil in you" "And there you had a massive amnesiac attack." "You turned your rage on yourself." "The life and death struggle, Jon, it's not over yet." "Don't be afraid of the pain." "Just go into it." "Deep down!" "Sense it." "Feel it." "Touch it." "Don't deny it." "I'm here." "I'm here to help you through it." "I can handle your rage." "Jon?" "Yes." "I think that the experiments are going well." "I think you are reaching your subconscious." "I think you're giving up the lie and seeking the truth." "I think one day you're gonna be able to forgive yourself, to say, "I love."" "What are you feeling right now, Jon?" "I want to know." "What are you feeling?" "Tell me what you're feeling." "What is your image?" "You're trying to tell me something?" "Do you want to tell me something, Jon?" "The hand." "I see." "Where is the hand now?" "Near your neck." "What does the hand want?" "It wants to kill you." "Why?" "Why does the hand want to kill me?" "Because it hates you." "No, Jon." "No, Jon." "You hate me." "You!" "You!" "It's your hate!" "It's your will!" "Take responsibility for it!" "There is no hand, Jon!" "There is no..."