"As instructed by Pablo Picasso's heirs, we inform you that this film is a work of fiction, freely based on real characters." "Mr. Wilhelm Kostrowitzky?" "That's me." "We're from the police." "We have a search warrant for your apartment." "Why?" "An anonymous letter has linked you to the theft of the Gioconda." "What is it?" "Mr. Pablo Ruiz..." "Picasso?" "Is that you?" "Yes." "You have to come with me." "I have an order from the Prefecture." "There must be a mistake." "What's going on?" "This gentleman is required to testify to the examining magistrate at 9:00." " I can pay for a taxi." " Get on." "There." "We can't take a taxi paid for by the accused." "Rules are rules." ""THE GIOCONDA STOLEN"" ""Police hunting for INTERNATIONAL GANG."" "Mr. Ruiz, you are here to testify as a witness regarding the theft of property belonging to the French Republic from the Louvre National Museum." "Bring in the accused." "Mr. Ruiz, do you know this man?" "I've never seen him in my life." "SEVERAL YEARS BEFORE" "THE PICASSO GANG" " Excuse me." " Are you all right, Léo?" "Henri-Pierre!" "How are you?" "I'm fine, how are you?" "Very well." "You look very elegant." " I'm delighted to see you." " Likewise." "I was just advising these people who the people who have bought this painting." "Someone paid money for that?" " 500 francs, to be precise." " 500 francs." "Are they crazy?" "No, they're Americans." "And they've got..." "They're brother and sister." "Jews." "I'm their artistic adviser." "I think this is a good day for Matisse and for me too." "Excuse me." "You see?" "If you'd shown your "Acrobats"," "I bet you'd have sold them, and for more." "They can see them in my studio." "I'm sure that American whose jacket you've just ruined will love the filth in your studio and be captivated by the smell of kerosene and dog piss." "A portrait of the fat lady?" "Of the sister, free, of course, that never fails." "Why free?" "They've got money." "Not that much." "Maybe we'll leave the fat lady's portrait for another day." "Let's eat." ""A vast black sleep falls over my life." "Sleep, all hope." "Sleep, all desire!" "I see nothing." "I've lost all memory of good and evil." "Oh, the sorry tale." "I am a cradle" "Rocked by a hand in the depth of a vault..." "Silence!" "Silence." "I knew he'd do that." "He loves it." "I'd like to have your opinion." " The song of the..."ill-loved"?" " I'm the "ill-loved"." "By that girl who went to America?" "Lost loves are wonderful for poets." "Really?" "They make our spirit fertile." "With Annie, I had an explosion of incredible verses." "Kostro!" "Baron!" "You look great!" "I'd like you to meet my Spanish friends, Pablo..." "Hello, how are you?" "...and Manolo, the king of the Parisian underworld." "A pleasure." "Join us, baron." "I'd love to, but I'm on now." "Enjoy your lunch, and I hope you'll enjoy the show." "Ladies and gentleman, good day!" "I'm going to astonish you with some feats of juggling." "Who's that baron?" "A bank colleague." "I've told you about him." "No, you haven't." "He inspired my story." ""The sexual feats..."" "Adventures!" ""The Adventures of Baron d'Ormessan"." "He's an incredible guy." "His father was an important lawyer in Brussels." " Was?" " He killed himself." "The baron deserted from the army and ended up here." "Like me." "What does he live off?" "From what he finds." "He doesn't steal from wickedness or to get rich." "Like me, like me." "He likes challenges." "Things that test his mental strength or his physical capacity." "And sexually, he's a wonder of nature." "He's told me all sorts of adventures he's had with all kinds of beings." "No, that's not me, not at all." "He's an incredible guy." "Thank you." "Guillaume, you need a woman, the kind that doesn't make poets suffer." "The kind destined for eternal love!" "A woman, shit!" "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" "I'm sorry..." "Hey, there's no need to be rude!" "Wait!" " How much is left?" " Enough." "Let's go!" "Where are you going?" "To find some women!" "Verlaine is very good, but don't forget about Rimbaud." "Rimbaud is too much of a symbolist!" "Are you leaving?" "I'm staying." "POETS' RENDEZ-VOUS" "Oh, it's you." "Good day, gentleman." "Hasn't she arrived yet?" "What's that?" "The sketches of my bust." "You're still going on with raffle?" "For a bust that doesn't exist and never will!" "But no one knows that." "I just sell the tickets." "No!" "That's out of the question." "Let's stick to what we have here." "What will happen when people ask who won?" "I'll tell them the winner was the famous poet Max Jacob." "Thank you, I'm lucky at gambling, but..." "I'm sick of "wild fruits"." "Max, please." " I'm sorry." " I mean the dust you're raising." "It sticks to the paint." "Sorry." "We'll do it the Spanish way." "Fernande, where's the water jug?" "Behind the stove." "Is this it?" "She's here!" " Fernande!" " I can't." "Coming!" "Coming right now!" "Good afternoon." "You're very welcome." "Have you had an earthquake here?" "I'd like you to meet Miss Gertrude Stein." "A pleasure." "Guillaume Apollinaire." " Max Jacob." " Good afternoon." "Manolo." "And Pablo Picasso, the creator of these magnificent paintings." "His most recent work." "I've seen these paintings before." "This one has never been exhibited." "They look like tramps, but they're sorcerers, fairies and the harlequin Trismegistus." "It was interesting upside down, wasn't it?" "This is Alice Toklas." "She has just arrived from San Francisco and she doesn't speak a single word of French." "What is your date of birth?" "Good afternoon." "This is Miss Fernande, the muse and inspiration of our artist." "What are they saying?" "I don't understand it, it's American, not English." "Would you be interested in giving her French classes?" "I'm not a teacher." "But you are French, aren't you?" "Yes, I am." "Then that's settled." " I'm ready." " Good." "Our artist has to take advantage of his inspiration." "We should leave him alone with his model." "I'm an astrology enthusiast, that's why I asked your date of birth." "You know, you are very like a character in my novel." "Really?" "You can stay, if you wish." "I'd love you to read something to me while I'm posing." "Yes, why not?" "What do you suggest?" "Don't finish it too quickly, I know you." " Take your time, get to know her." " "Paradise Lost" by Milton," "Do you have that?" "No, but I have "Fantomas"." "Or "Nick Carter"." "Until she buys it, don't finish the portrait." ""Buffalo Bill"." "Take your time." "I'm not saying..." "I can't, it's not working." "I've had 80 sessions and the painting's getting worse." "Don't get obsessed." "You're "the painter of modern life"" "that Baudelaire announced." "He has to paint what he feels." "She has no interest in the "Acrobats", or in any other painting." "She hasn't even bought a sketch." "She hasn't bought anything." "And she stinks, with that tunic she never takes off, not even to sleep." "My acrobats?" "Your acrobats, puppeteers and Hermes-Trismegistus?" "What do you mean?" "All that melancholy..." "It's sentimentalism, literature." "It isn't painting." "It's shit!" "What matters isn't the theme, it's the painting, the form." "Matisse has understood that already." "He's the painter of modern life!" "Come on, let's go." "Whose idea was it to paint the fat woman?" "Come on!" "Where's Max?" "Kostro, do you know why it's called the "Mona Lisa"?" "Mona is a contraction of madonna which in Italian means madame" "Madonna, mona." "Certo, certo." "And why Lisa?" "Because it's a portrait of Lisa, the wife of Giocondo, a wealthy silk merchant in Florence." "Come on!" "What I'm going to show you isn't well known, but it's very special." "The Phoenician Room?" "You'll see." "Isn't it wonderful, Pablo?" "In this room there must be approximately 50 or more of these heads." "They're pre-Roman, aren't they?" "Undoubtedly prior to the 5th Century B.C." "These are from your country, from "Cerro de los Santos" in Andalusia." "I love those enormous ears." " They're votive statues." " What does that mean?" "They were offered to the gods to cure the sick." "They have magic powers." "Or so they say." "Do you like them?" "They're fantastic." "Fernande..." "Yes, all right." "But you could have got it." "I'm working." "Yeah, you're working." "I do work, not like you." "You just lie there all day and do nothing." "I can't even clean, the dust annoys you." "I can't work as a model because models sleep with the painters." "That's the usual thing." "Really?" "Well, you haven't slept with Gertrude." "She's not my type." "And I don't think I'm hers!" "I can't go to the market because someone might look at me." "Well, today you can go." "Yes, we have guests today, so go to the market." " Very well." " Yes." " I'm going." " Accompanied by Max, of course." "Of course." "And with about money?" "Have any of you got money?" ""Mercure" still owes me for three articles." "And I came here to borrow from you." "Ask Max." "You know very well Max hasn't got a cent." "Let him find it." "I don't know!" "See if they'll give you credit..." " Go on!" " Give us credit?" "You think people have nothing better to do?" "Well, to what do I owe this timely vist?" "We've brought you a gift." "A gift!" "Really, there are two." "I thought you'd like to have the happy couple." " They're the ones you liked." " Yes." "But, how?" "First one, and then the other." "In fact, it was very easy to steal from the Louvre." "I may have no money, but I do have some talent." "He doesn't do it for the money, but he has to live." "Guillaume, I'm broke." "When you finish the fat woman's portrait..." "Pablo!" "Please, Max." "Help me, we'll put him on the bed." " He's back on the ether." " It's my fault." "Keep him awake." " Max!" "Max!" " Max, say something." "Max!" "Onion." "Onion?" "Yes, of course, onion." "Cosmically speaking, there is an infinity of parallel worlds that co-exist, forming delicate layers, like those of an onion." " Very interesting." " What else have you discovered?" "There are angels living on some layers, demons living on others, all in an incredible equilibrium." "Of course, of course." "Can you imagine if that equilibrium broke?" "Let's hope it doesn't." "We're going to take you home." "Aren't we, Pablo?" "Where's Pablo?" "We'll lay him out there." "Put him on the bench." "Are you erasing it?" "Yes." "But this painting was your visiting card." "It was to open the Steins' doors." "Now I know how to finish it." "I've found the model." "It has strength." "I like it." "It combines admirably the three essential elements in any work of art:" "Unity, purity and truth." "Yes, but with regard precisely to unity, if the style of the face is changed, shouldn't the same be done with the rest?" "What do you think?" "Like that, it's as if" "Gertrude was wearing a mask." " A mask?" " Yes, a mask." "Yes, yes, of course, a mask!" "We all wear a mask, a mask of love or friendship." "In fact, during Carnival, we should take them off, not put them on." "Our "dear master" has arrived." "Have you seen this?" "The master found it on our way here." "In the junk shop in Rue de Rennes." "Yes, I know it well, "Le Père soulier"." " Exactly." "How are you, Manolo?" " I'm very well." "You know each other?" "Georges Braque, Henri Matisse, our "dear master", and Pablo Picasso, our "little toreador" and his group." "What do you think of my portrait?" "Do you like it?" "Is it finished?" "It's hard to find an artistic sensation in monochrome." "I'm not interested in color." "If you have to put it in, you do, but for me it's like adding salt to the soup." "It doesn't really look like her." "She'll end up looking like it." "Fernande, your best pupil has arrived." "Let's go and say hello." "I've brought her astral chart." "I really like it." " Hello, Fernande." " Hello, Max." "No, no, Gertrude!" "This is personal." "She is Taurus, like Shakespeare." "My statue, my dear man." "May I?" "Thank you." "The fact is, it's a little gift." " No." " Yes." "Thank you so much." "It's very thoughtful of you." "I'll have to find a place for it." " We have to act now." " Leave it to me." "Pablo, do you know Georges Braque?" "More or less." "Painter, musician, boxer..." "A real proletarian dandy." "Then you have everything." "Except that I don't speak Spanish." " A pleasure." " Likewise." "And congratulations." " You like it?" " Very much." " Would you like a cigarette?" " Yes, indeed." "Thank you." "Excuse me." "George, this was wonderful, But I have to go." " So soon?" " My mother will be worried." "Well, goodbye." " See you tomorrow." " Goodbye, little Laurencin." "Her mother is always worried." "Who is she?" "I met her at the Humbert Academy." "She wanted to decorate porcelain, and I persuaded her to concentrate on painting." "She has talent." "And charm." "She's ravishing!" "Forget it, she's inaccessible." "No father, a controlling mother..." "I tease her and tell her she is probably... a lesbian." "Excuse me." "A real lesbian?" "He has started a monumental canvas but he can't pay for it." "It would be a shame if he couldn't..." "It would be a great pity for modern art." "What is the subject of the painting?" " The theme of the painting...?" " A brothel." " Yes, a brothel." " What?" "A brothel?" "Yes, the first I ever went to, on the Carrer d'Avinyó." " In Avignon?" " No, not in Avignon." "On the Carrer d'Avinyó, in Barcelona." "I see." "It's a very interesting subject," " and very important." " Is it?" "You really think so?" "If it weren't for such places, husbands would have mistresses who would have illnesses and expenses, and the middle class would be infected and ruined." "Without the middle class we'd go back to the Middle Ages." "An interesting theory." "Only art can save us from the terror and nausea that Darwinian nature produces in us." "Very well." "I would like to make a humble contribution." "Just for the canvas, the labor and the paints." "So that our dear artist can live from his art." " I hope that is enough." " Léo." "Léo." "And now, if you'll excuse me..." "We did it!" "And if he's given you an advance, he'll buy the painting." " By the way..." " What is it?" " It's for..." " And, there, it's disappeared." " He's saving to go to America." " America?" "This will be enough for the ticket and expenses." "Your generosity amazes me." " You should change your acquaintances." " Really?" "I've found the woman for you." "You have?" "What's she like?" "I don't know." "I've seen her, but I don't know her." "She's a young girl, the kind you like." ""I don't know." "I've seen her, but I don't know her." "She's a young girl, the kind you like." "She has the childlike, melancholic face of those women destined for eternal love"." "Guillaume Apollinaire, Marie Laurencin." ""I'm telling you, I've found the woman for you," "She is ugliness and beauty." "She is like everything we love today." "And she must taste of laurel leaves"." "Pusiquette..." "Come here." "Oh, yes, very good." "They're very good, I like them." "They're very original." "I like them." "Really?" "They aren't influenced by other painters, neither in the composition nor the colors." "I like them." "They have something special, absolutely feminine." " Are you all right?" " Yes." "Is someone here?" "Yes, I'm with a friend." "Who is it?" "Someone I wanted to show my paintings to." "Very well." "Is anything wrong?" "My mother..." "Men aren't allowed in this house." "She's distrustful, every time she sees me with a man..." "She thinks he wants to take advantage of you." "She thinks I'll get pregnant, as she did." "What did she do?" "Did they get married?" "He was already married, with a family." "All I remember is that he was a gentleman with a top hat who appeared here occasionally and told me to call him "papa"." "Dear Marie, we are soul mates." "My real name is Wilhelm Albert Vladimir Apollinaris de Kostrowitzky." "My mother," "Angelica Marie Alexandrine de Kostrowitzky, whom I love very much, has such a strong Slav personality that she will always be jealous of whoever her son loves." "Her father belonged to the Russian-Polish aristocracy." "She was educated by the Sacred Heart nuns, who only accepted girls born of the aristocracy, from which you will deduce that I too am the son of a single mother." "Do you know who your father is?" "They say he was the son of L'Aiglon, Bonaparte's heir, who met my mother in Rome." "So I'd be the great-grandson of Napoleon." "It seems incredible." "It's more likely he was the nobleman Francesco Flugi d'Aspermont, who served under the king of the Two Sicilies." "My mother says she had me at 14, "without realizing"." "Here they are." "It's a collection I edit and for which I write the prologue" ""Masters of Love", Sacher Masoch." "And the Marquis of Sade." "Oh, marquis..." "The third theory about my father is that he was the bishop of Monaco." "Pablo thinks that's the most convincing theory." "And if you like the others..." " Wilhelm!" " Yes, mother!" "THE ADVENTURES OF BARON D'ORMESSAN" "Wilhelm!" "Albert has told me that you're leaving the Lepère Bank." "What does that mean?" "It's true, mother." "I've decided to live exclusively from literature." "I was afraid of that." "The nonsense you write won't feed you." "You should learn from your brother Albert." "You're always upsetting me." "The table is set." "Don't be long." "You know that annoys me." "What does G.A. Mean?" "They're the initials of Guillaume Apollinaire, which is my pseudonym and how everyone knows me." "She is joyful, she is kind, she is... generous and full of talent." "She's like a little sun." "She's like a female version of me," "You know I'm writing an article for "Physical Culture"." "And what is it about?" "I have the first article:" ""Is dancing a sport?"." "And I'm preparing the second:" ""Guy de Maupassant, athlete"." "Is something wrong?" "Is it Fernande?" "We argue all the time." "She wants to go out on her own and live her own life." "But we're a couple!" "At least they seem to get on well." "What about the work of art?" " The brothel?" " Yes." "Are the statues working?" "Yes." "It seems that African statues are in fashion now." " Did you see Matisse's?" " Yes." "Your picture will be the corner stone of new painting." "Léo will love it, he's got an eye for modern things." "Let me see." "This is good, very good." "Look what Pablo has drawn." "It's very good." "We could do a bestiary." " What?" " What?" "A bestiary." "A series of animals like that, drawn with one stroke." "And I'd do the poetic texts for each one." "For example?" "For example, the camel." ""The camel travels without drinking and I drink without travelling"." " Everything OK?" " Yes." " I have to go, my mother..." " I'll accompany you." "We're going too." "Pablo..." "I'm sorry, but..." "So long!" "What did you think of Fernande?" "I don't know, I haven't got much to say to her" "Why?" "All she talks about are dresses and perfumes." "I don't like that girl." "Why?" "She acts like an innocent young girl, but I don't trust her." "I'm sure she's with Guillaume out of self-interest." "What do you think?" " It's very good." " Perfect." "You'll see, it'll attract attention." "I want to give a big opening party." "I love Fernande's hat." "It isn't a hat." "No?" "Then what is it?" " It's a vase." " Oh, yes, a vase, that's right!" "I love it, I love it." " Here, I've read them." " Already?" "My mother gave me a love of books." "Well!" "She didn't read them, did she?" "No." "She'd die, poor thing." "Did you like them?" "Yours in particular." "Really?" "You have a rampant imagination," "But what I liked most is that..." "I don't know, it's feminine and cruel at the same time." "Feminine?" "What's your idea of feminine?" "The best moments of my life were when I was a child, when I was in a community of nuns." "Nuns?" "They'd take me in their arms, show me illustrated books, let me play the harmonium..." "They called me "Little Laurencin"." ""Little Laurencin"." ""Little Laurencin", I adore these artist's hands, this long, supple body, this hair that sends me into ecstasy." "I want to be your master," "I want you to obey me in everything, over and above what is polite." "You're frightening me." "Fear is the doorway to pleasure." "I want you always to be my docile slave." "You'll see, in a few minutes, the hottest geyser in the world will erupt." "Wait." "What is it?" " I don't want to get pregnant." " And you won't!" "I am very well acquainted with the nine doors of the female body." "I am your master and I have all the keys." "I'm like an ogre who is offered a child to eat." "I'll come back for the rest of my things." "What will you live on?" "I told you, I have my French classes." " You'll go back to modelling and..." " Yes, I know." "I'll end up sleeping with all the artists." "That's your problem, Pablo, your stupid jealousy." "My jealousy?" "I'm sick of having to account for all I do, I'm sick of being shut away." "Goodbye." "You'll be back!" "...dressed as a Breton sailor, like those in Quimper, and surrounded by women." "Are you going on a trip?" "Pablo," "I wanted to show Manolo how handsome I was in..." "But..." "I've disappeared!" "Is the sailor not there now?" "That's the brothel on the Carrer d'Avinyo." "In Avignon, according to my patron." "I swear, I was right in the middle." "Didn't you have a grandmother in Avignon?" "She looks like you!" "And that one looks like Marie Laurencin's grandmother!" "That other one is the image of Apollinaire's mother!" "Do you know Apollinaire's mother?" "Marry the mother of Apollinaire." "Who would you be like?" "The mother of Apollinaire." "You would be the step-father of Apollinaire." "We could make another Appollinaire." "It would be with the mother, of Apollinaire..." " Good day." " Apollinaire." "Sorry to interrupt you." "Gentlemen, come in." "Good day, Pablo." "Excuse us, we couldn't resist the temptation" " of visiting the brothel." " But it's not open yet," "I mean, not finished." "It's all right, don't worry." "These gentlemen are used to works in process." "What's that?" "A vision of the voluptuousness of the flesh against everyday horror." "Eros and Thanatos, life and death, permanence..." "I can only see a horrible mass of bodies." "Pablo, what is this?" "I'm trying something." "I'm looking for primitive language." "First it was the Iberian sculptures and now..." "The Iberian sculptures" "I'm looping for forms that are more universal, more synthetic," " more..." " Like that nose?" "Is that it?" "But Pablo is talking in the Platonic sense, the nose as the quintessence, as the ideal." "The ideal?" "That isn't the ideal of a nose for Plato or for... anyone." "It looks more like a quarter of brie." "Yes, a quarter of brie." "That's it!" " Very good!" "Excellent!" " Thank you." "What do you think, "dear master"?" "I think it's a very unfunny joke, and in extremely bad taste." "Is that why my African statue interested you?" " I think there's a misunderstanding." " Gentlemen, I have to leave." "You know what?" "You should work with a model." "It's the only way to learn." "Well, cheer up." "Good day to you." "I'll make him pay for this." "He'll pay for it." "Are you all right?" "I'm really sorry, I swung my arm too hard." " OK, boys, I'm leaving." " Don't you like sport?" "I like gymnastics, not violence." "You can run, practice athletics..." "Running is for cowards." "Are you hurt?" "Other blows hurt me more." "I heard something about that." "What did you do to Matisse?" " I told you, didn't I?" " Yes, it's incredible." ""Now for something even more difficult", like in the circus." "Yes, we painters will end up drinking gasoline, or, even better, turpentine, to breath fire." "Aren't you going to finish it?" "No." "Why?" "You saw Matisse's reaction." "As soon as I exhibit it they'll kick me back to Spain." "I'd get a worse drubbing than you gave me today." "It's a pity, because I think it's got some very interesting things." " Really?" " Yes." "But I have to say, the painting in itself is madness." "But there is a way." "And... it's brilliant." "Really?" "For example..." "The way you have of deconstructing forms so that they come together at a central point that comes from below and divides the strength." "Excuse me." "Georges, take my advice, join Pablo's gang." "No, that's..." "He does the same things as Matisse." "I don't do the same things as Matisse." "No, what I mean is:" "Just do it and we'll see how it turns out." "My gang has no future, you know that." "Pablo, let Georges be the school principal." "He's better looking than you, and gets on better with people." "Let's make a pact." "That's it!" "SOME YEARS LATER" "These days, you have to know mathematics and geometry if you want to be up to date." "Manolo, you're intelligent, you'll end up doing Cubism." "And you, Pablo, will end up wearing out my patience." "In any case, Cubismo is unstoppable." "It'll go farther than Fauvism, than Impressionism." "You think so?" "Here's the proof." "This incredible flowering." "A flowering, yes, but of mushrooms." " Well?" " It's a "Braque"." "And it shows." "Excuse me." "Marie, my dear, forgive me for being late." " Henri-Pierre!" " You remember Franz?" "I am in Paris four years ago." "No, no." ""I was in Paris four years ago."" "Remember your tenses." "This time he's staying until he masters French." ""I not Paris leave"." "No." "We thought you weren't coming." "Who'd review this painting in "Mercure"?" "Exactly." "I've written it already." ""Marie Laurencin has managed to express in painting an entirely feminine aesthetic." "Her art dances, as Salome would, between that of Picasso, the new St. John the Baptist who washes the arts with the baptism of light, and that of Rousseau..."" "But you're the school principal." "What's going on?" "It's Georges who has exhibited the first Cubist painting." "But you invented Cubism." "I don't understand why you refuse to exhibit." " Good bye, Marie." " Good bye." "I can't stand Henri-Pierre." "Your obsessions again." "Why are you being so aggressive?" "Henri-Pierre is everyone's friend." "Then he's no one's friend." "Kostro!" "Excuse me." "I want to greet a very dear friend." "...I dived in and thanks to my swimming skills" "I covered the 800 yards..." "Forgive me!" "And I was in America, land of the Wild West, indians and dollars..." "America welcomed me with open arms and made me vastly wealthy." "I'm very sorry, but I can't do it next week." "I'm going to the Pyrenees to paint with my Spanish friends:" "Manolo... and Pablo." "Pablo Picasso." "Mr. Picasso." "But I lost it all gambling." "That's life." "Now, all I want is to go back to my mother, some good steaks and French wines." "But I have a little problem." "I have nowhere to live." "But I was told that you've left your mother's." "You have your own place." "The train takes us to Perpignan." "And from there to the house?" "Two or three hours by carriage." "Just wait, you'll adore Céret." "It's an unbelievable town and the house is..." "I'm sorry I'm late, I had a few problems." " And Marie Laurencin?" " She's not going." " Neither am I." " Guillaume, surely not!" "You're not going?" "Nor Max?" "No, he fought with Pablo." "So now it's my fault." "You know what he's like." "We've rented a huge house with an enormous studio and lots of rooms." "Please forgive me, but I have to go." "Wait, I'll see you out." "I won't be long" " How's the baron?" " Same as ever." " Get rid of him." " I've thrown him out." "Well done!" "What about Marie?" "Come on, come to Céret!" "And leave her on her own?" " Do you think...?" " Yes, yes." "I know her well, I think she has a lover." "A lover?" "But, who?" "That's what I Intend to find out." "I ended up alone on the streets of Paris, with eight francs in my pocket and not a word of French." "I bumped into a man and he said:" ""Excuse me"." "I said to myself:" ""This is a civilised country"." "Tell them about the bakery." "The next day I went into a bakery and for 5 centimes the beautiful girl at the counter gave me a bread roll, white, wonderful, delicious, and she said:" ""Thank you"." ""No doubt about it", I thought, "this is my country"." "And I stayed." "Manolo, do you have no desire to cross now?" " The border?" " Yes." "Only when I'm sure I won't be arrested as a deserter." "Why risk it, Manolo?" "You have everything here:" "They speak Catalan, dance "sardanas" and they even have bullfights." "Yes, but..." "I miss the feeling of tragedy." " You want to be tragic?" " Yes." " The Spanish are very tragic." " That's true." "Disaster runs in our veins." "Not like the French." "You have reason and order In your veins." "But that doesn't stop me liking the French." "Cheers, my friend." "I am touched." "Manolo transformed into a model citizen." "I'm sure you'll be a famous sculptor." "I don't care about that." "Fernande." "I don't judge men by the sculptures, books or paintings they create." "Then by what?" "What interests me in a man is to know if he has been tested." "Tested?" "Yes." "What shapes men are the tests to which they are submitted and how they endure them." "I don't care about the rest." " It's unbelievable!" " What?" " The Gioconda's been stolen!" " Stolen?" "It's true!" "What does it say, Georges?" "It was on Monday, when the Louvre is closed." "Well, it's open, but just for thieves." "There's a reward of 50,000 francs." "Really?" " There's a telegram for you." " It'll be from Guillaume." "He'll be roaring with laughter." ""Louvre security in doubt." "Are the guards accomplices?"" " Is it from Guillaume?" " Yes." ""The baron has stolen the Madonna's heart."" "What?" "The baron!" "The Madonna.!" "The baron we know?" "It was the baron who stole the Gioconda!" "We're accomplices!" "We'll be arrested!" "We could cross into Spain." "Not me!" "I'm between a rock and a hard place." "But how does Guillaume know?" "I don't know." "What does he say?" ""Come!"" " What?" " Come?" "Guillaume..." "He's in big trouble." "Yes, he's in his house." "The baron, I mean." "Guillaume..." "He's an idiot!" "Pablo, you have to go." "I'll go with you." "Leave?" "Now?" "We can't abandon Guillaume." "What can I do?" "What use will it be if I go?" "These are the tests that shape men, Pablo." "THE GIOCONDA AFFAIR POLICE HAVE NO CLUES" "The mysterious lady that Da Vinci portrayed has wiped the smile off the French government's face." "Never in the history of Paris, except for Marie Antoinette, has a woman had so much influence on those who bow their heads." "Have you seen her, have you seen her, have you seen the Gioconda?" "Have you seen her, have you seen her, have you seen the Gioconda?" "Keep listening to learn how the story ends." "The police looked for her everywhere:" "In the Place de l'Opéra, in Montparnasse Station, in the brothels of Pigalle." "It could be a robbery, a farce, recklessness, a vengeful lover who has run away with her." " Hello, Pablo." " Take this." "Here." "Fernande, how are you?" "Awful, we've had a horrible journey." "Pablo..." "Don't say anything." "The song of the Gioconda!" "Are you sure it was the baron?" "When I threw him out he said he'd do something big." "I never saw him again." "Fortunately." "Pablo!" " Are you all right?" " Hello." " Everything OK?" " Hello, Guillaume." "Hello." "I thought you were in the Pyrenees." "Fernande, my dear, are you well?" " No, she's not well." " My God!" " That's why we came back." " Oh, no!" "The air in the Pyrenees didn't agree with her." "You two look wonderful." " You have a good color." " Yes, we do." "The Tuscan sun." "You should come, It cures everything." "Yes, it cures every illness." "You know they published my book?" "Yes, it's finally come out." "You are in it, Fernande." " Yes, the slave." " Melantcha." "I had to pay for the publication." "We had to fight with the editor." "He didn't understand Gertrude's style." "It's unbelievable, the book has irritated some people" " but everyone else adores it." " Of course." "My brother is in the first group." " Gertrude." " Yes?" "We're having our soirée on Saturday." "I hope you'll be better." "You can't miss it." " We've got a lot to tell you." " Yes." "The police are getting nowhere and they're desperate to find a scapegoat." "Calm down, Guillaume, don't be so fatalistic." "I had the material author of the theft in my home and I published harangues:" ""Down with museums that paralyze our imagination!" "Empty them!"" "It's obvious, I'm the gang leader." "What do you want from me?" "I want you to help me." "Why didn't you ask Max, or André, or anyone else in Paris?" "Come on, Pablo..." "What do I have that they don't?" " Money!" " Money?" "Hello, I wasn't expecting you so soon." "We had to come back early." "She isn't well." "Hello, Suzanne." " I'd like to rest." " Come with me." "Close the door." "Prepare an infusion for her and let her have some air." "Thank you." " Why do you want my money?" " To pay the baron!" "What?" "50,000 francs?" "What the "Paris-Journal" is offering?" "No, I'm sure he'd settle for a lot less, 15 or 20,000." "Do you think I'm a millionaire?" "Pablo, once you sell "The Brothel..."" " It isn't finished!" " Pablo, with that money, I could get rid of the baron." "He wants to go back to his mother, in Brussles." "That would end all the problems." "I know him well, I created him." "I know that..." "You made me come from Céret," "I never gave you this envelope" "And I don't know the baron." "Understood?" "My name will never be mentioned." "Never!" "Suzanne says Max's concierge came here." "What's wrong with Max now?" "He's talking to himself but he won't open the door." "One of his crises..." " When?" "Last night?" " Yes, last night." "I must go." "I have to deliver an urgent article." "Very well." "Now I'm the St. Bernard for a gang of scoundrels!" " Pablo, it's not my fault!" " Come on, Fernande!" "I'm exhausted too!" "Max!" " Max!" " We have to do something." "Max..." "Is it you?" "Or are you an apparition?" "No, it's us." "This morning, an angel came." "It was there, motionless." "And there were six monks who looked like me, carrying another monk, obviously dead." "He's got it bad this time." "I'll say." "And a woman, with her arms and legs covered in blood, wearing a half moon on her head." " Here." " Come along, Max." "Good evening!" "Allow me." "Well, Max, I see you're still in good form." "A divine angel is carrying me in his arms." "Am I ready?" "You're a lucky guy, Pablo." "A minute later and you'd have lost this great chance." "Evening, Fernande." "Baron, we have no time." "No, I'm not ready..." "It's one of those works of art that you like." "I'm sorry, I haven't got a cent." "Wait, wait!" "I'll make you an offer that you can't refuse." "I took another woman so that "Big Ears" won't feel lonely." "Is that the last thing you swiped from the Louvre?" "Yes, just before that guy stole the Gioconda." "He didn't do us any favor." "I can't go in and out of the Phoenician Room anymore." "The business is finished." "What if you give me..." "I'm not giving you a cent for that shit!" "OK, Pablo." "As you wish." "I was just doing you a favor." "I'll have no trouble selling it, and at a very good price." "Max, Fernande, it's always a pleasure." "Good bye, my angel." "Guillaume is completely insane." "I haven't seen the baron." "I have." "And..." "Guillaume, you're not the head of the gang." "What?" "Because the baron didn't steal the Madonna's heart." "What did he tell you?" "He tried to sell me the other stolen statue." "Yes, well..." "Is that all?" "What the hell's wrong with you?" "You made me come back from Céret, you imagine things." "Wait!" "Calm down, Guillaume." "What a surprise!" "I thought you were all in Céret." "Fernande is ill." "Heavens." "Are you meeting someone here?" "Maybe Henri-Pierre and his German friend." "I saw you all yesterday, You seemed to be having fun." "I don't believe it!" "You're spying on me!" "Is he your lover?" " It was before I met you." " When?" "We went to Munich to see Franz." "Did you sleep with both?" "No." "Tell me the truth!" "Henri-Pierre swapped me for two of Franz's mistresses." "I've got a goldmine here." "How many camels would I get for you?" "Did she confess?" "Henri-Pierre." "Henri-Pierre?" "Before she knew me, she says." "But I thought Henri-Pierre and the other..." "With him too!" "Him too?" "It seems they make a habit of swapping." " So they..." " That's not the worst." "No?" "The worst is that he is now her confidant." "I wouldn't worry about Henri-Pierre." "He's nothing, he just translates." "He himself is just a translation." "Imagine my perversions translated into five languages." "Have you brought me the envelope?" "I completely forgot!" " Are you leaving tomorrow?" " No, the day after." "We're seeing Gertrude and Léo." "Are you going?" " You should get out." " No." " And don't forget the envelope." " I won't." "Léo and I have decided to split the collection." "Unfortunately." "Don't worry." "I'm keeping the Picassos, he's keeping the Matisses." "As for the Cézannes and the Renoirs, nothing's decided." "We're still discussing it." "You keep the Cézannes and let him have the Renoirs." "Agreed?" "But what's happened?" "Léo doesn't understand Cubism." "He doesn't understand my relationship with Alice." "It's awful." "And he doesn't understand the things I write." "Of course not." "That's the fate of artists like us who break new ground." "Isn't that so, Pablo?" "Yes, of course." "All prophets are martyrs." "Alice says that you in painting and I in literature are the great innovators of modern art." "Thank you for the compliment." "For me, the sensation always appears first, and the idea comes after." "The Cubists, however, conceive an idea and then ask themselves:" ""What sensation does this give me?"" "There was a very nice article in the "Kansas Press"" "that we really liked." " Really?" " Excuse me." "Especially because we didn't even know that newspaper existed." "What is art for you?" "I dream of a balanced pure, peaceful art, the subject of which is neither worrying" "nor disturbing." "Continue, continue, dear master." "An art that relaxes the brain, rather like a good armchair that eases our physical exhaustion." "Very good, excellent!" "And you, Pablo, what do you think?" "I agree with our dear master." "I think that that "decorative" art is perfect for calming the consciences of the rich bourgeoisie who hang it in their drawing rooms." "It's like those hunters who hang their trophies on the walls." "Those horrible stuffed animal heads." "Translate, translate for our friend." "And tell him that he can get fucked without a woman being involved!" "Gentlemen, it has been a memorable artistic tasting." " Let's go, Pablo." " Fernande!" " You went a bit far." " What about you?" " Did you bring the money?" " No, I forgot." "Tomorrow..." "I knew it, I knew he wouldn't come." "If he needs money, why doesn't he just ask me?" "If he does, you won't give it to him." "Pablo!" " Wait!" " There he is." "You see." "Look." "Read that." "THIEF RETURNS STOLEN STATUE TO THE LOUVRE" ""The first time I visited the Louvre was in March 1907." "I had a lot of time to kill and little money to spend." "It was midday and I found myself in the Phoenician Antiques gallery." "A guard was sitting nearby, dozing." "The room was full of sculpted stone heads, all piled up." "I saw how easy it was to steal from the Louvre." "I chose a conical shaped woman's head," "I covered it with my coat which I had over my shoulders and then I walked calmly out of the museum." "The next day I did the same thing with the head of a man with big ears, which I loved." "I sold the statues to a painter friend for 50 sous." "Then I emigrated to America. "" "Suzanne!" "Suzanne!" "Come on, Suzanne!" "About time." "We forgot our keys." " Did you miss the train?" " No, well, yes." "Unfortunately I haven't prepared any food." "Don't worry about it." "Will this do?" "Come along, Guillaume." "Why are you taking my case?" "What if we give them back through "Paris-Journal"?" "Guillaume..." "We've never seen these heads." "Got that?" "Give me the heads!" "And I don't know the baron." "Is that clear?" " What about me?" " A little, by sight." "We deny everything." "And this has to disappear immediately." "Stavelot is a wonderful place where people go to take the waters." "It has a famous casino." "Yes, yes." "My mother, her young lover and I spent a marvellous summer there in a charming hotel." "The last evening, my mother and her friend went gambling." " They lost everything." " Even his shirt." "The worst thing is they left my brother and me with the unpaid bill." "What did you do?" "Climbed down a rope made of sheets, but they caught us." "Give me a hand." " Wait, wait." " What is it?" "I've got a record." "A record?" "Yes, a record." "The second time will be recidivism." "I've got a record too." "You?" "From when?" "When I got to Paris, because of my Catalonian friends." "Pablo, I'm petrified..." "This is the property of the French state." "If we're caught, they'll deport me to Russia." "That's the nationality on my papers." "They'll deport me to Spain." "Don't look, someone's coming..." "What'll we do?" "Give me a cigarette." "And tell me something." "But, you know, Russia isn't so bad." "In Moscow I'll have my samovar to warm me inside." "I could write Part Two of "Crime and Punishment"." "Kostro?" "Baron!" "Good evening, Pablo." "Did you follow us?" "Let's say I had time to spare and I was curious to see what you had in this mysterious case." "Don't say you were going to throw it in the Seine." "No, no." "They are works of art and, above all, my trophies." "It was very hard to get them." "Baron, wouldn't it be best for everyone if you disappeared?" "I'd love to visit my mother in Brussels, but with the pittance the newspaper gave me..." "That is easily solved." "Is that enough?" "For the journey, yes, but..." "Do you want my mother to see me looking like this?" "Thank you, Kostro." "You know I'd be incapable of doing you any harm." "My life is irremediably linked to yours." "I'm your literary creation, I only live through your pen." "Goodbye, gentleman." "Don't do anything silly." "Remember that every good deed has its just punishment." ""What if all my enchantments by night and day were only lies?" "Lies and calumnies of truth!" "Horror of the vices of a ridiculous imagination!" "If the sky is empty of the colors I discover then I have been robbed and my soul must be reborn."" "It's wonderful, Max." "You've been hiding them away for years." "It's a whole unknown work." "It's my life." "My dilemma was always that I want to "understand"." "Occult science in this case," "Or prayer, Judaism, Christianity..." " They're back." " What were they doing?" "Don't ask questions, just get into bed." "No, that's not the best solution." "Why did you take so long?" "Because Guillaume..." "That's enough!" "Max is in there." "You didn't get rid of them." "No, we'll do it through the "Paris-Journal"." " You'll do it!" " Of course." " I'll get some rest, and tomorrow..." " I'm going to bed." "I don't know where you can sleep." "Max is on the couch." "Don't worry, you know I sleep like a log." "THE LOUVRE RECOVERS ITS TREASURES" ""I am an art lover, and a few years ago" "I was offered some sculpted heads from the end of the Roman Empire." "Unaware of their origin, and given the reasonable price, I bought them," "I was enormously surprised to see their great resemblance to the statue recently recovered through this newspaper." "Convinced that they are from the Louvre," "I am returning them anonymously as I am a serious person and hate any kind of publicity. "" " You've come back?" " Yes." "Thank you for taking the first step." "You don't know what's happened to me." "It's unbelievable!" "Guillaume..." "I need to feel the vertigo of these mountains!" "You're going away?" "You're leaving me?" "Just for a while." "It's best for both of us." "Marie, marry me." "What's to stop us?" "If we still aren't married after four years it's because your mother despises me." "To hell with my mother!" "Marie, what do you say?" "I have to go and you should go too." "Go where?" "I don't know." "What's going on?" "I have to leave, let go of me, please." "Let go." "Goodbye, Guillaume." "Marie!" "Marie!" "Marie!" " Mr. Wilhelm Kostrowitzky?" " That's me." "We're from the police." "We have a search warrant for your apartment." "Why?" "An anonymous letter has linked you to the theft of the Gioconda." "Robert..." "Yes?" "Do you know a certain Guillaume Apollinaire?" "That's me." "It's my pseudonym." "I was finalist for the Goncourt Prize." "Mr. Kostrowitzky, you are here to testify regarding the theft of art works belonging to the French state." "Do you know the Belgian citizen Géry Piéret, known as "The Baron"." "Yes, but not very well." "We frequented the same literary circles." "We haven't met since he emigrated to America." "And the..." ""painter friend" mentioned by Mr. Piéret, does he also frequent your same literary circles?" " What do you mean?" " I want his name." "Nothing in the law obliges me to betray the sacred bonds of friendship." "In that case, Mr. Kostrowitzky," "I accuse you of collaboration with and concealment of criminals, and you will be imprisoned until your trial." "Is that the bell?" "Yes." "What is it?" "Mr. Pablo Ruiz..." "Picasso?" "Is that you?" "You have to come with me." "I have an order from the Prefecture." "There must be a mistake." "What's going on?" "This gentleman is required to testify before the examining magistrate at 9:00." "But I've done nothing." "Don't worry, we've got time, you can get ready." "Come in, please." "Thank you." "Suzanne, go back to bed, it's nothing." "Pablo!" "What are you doing?" "Get down!" "Don't be stupid!" "They're coming for me." "I've done nothing." "I know." "Get dressed." "Get dressed!" "They think I stole the Gioconda." "If they did, wouldn't they have sent more police?" "Let me do it." "You have to stay calm." "I'm sure it's a misunderstanding." "Mr. Picasso is honest, I know him well." "He's serious and hard working." "I don't doubt it, sir." "The new police uniforms are very flattering." "We're ready." "Don't worry, we'll sort this out." "Good bye." "Thank you for your collaboration." "Will you just tell me what's going on?" "We're getting off soon." "At the next stop." "Come on." "Mr. Ruiz, you are here to testify as a witness regarding the theft of property belonging to the French Republic from the Louvre National Museum." "Bring in the accused." "Mr. Ruiz, do you know this man?" "I've never seen him before." "Has the accused anything to say?" "You say you don't know me, but didn't my poetry inspire you in your pink period in painting?" "Didn't you introduce me to my wife?" "Don't I eat every week at your house and sometimes you eat at mine?" "What do you have to say to that, Mr. Ruiz?" "Yes." "It's just that... at first..." "It seems you've recovered your memory." "Do you know Géry Piéret, known as "The Baron"?" "I hardly know him." "A few times with..." "Did you buy the statues stolen from the Louvre?" "No." "I didn't buy anything." "Yet Mr. Kostrowitzky has stated he took them to your home." " Isn't that so, Mr. Kostrowitzky?" " Yes, indeed, your honor." "Mr. Ruiz?" "Yes." "It was a gift." "A gift." "Mr. Kostrowitzky, did you contact Mr. Ruiz to sell him the Phoenician statues?" "Lberian, your honor." "Yes, I contacted him." "Did Mr. Ruiz know that the statues were stolen from the Louvre?" "He had absolutely no idea." "I never told him where they came from." "Max, get rid of them." "I've had enough." "Pablo..." " How are you?" " Fine." "What happened?" " They let me go, but..." " But, what...?" " Guillaume's still there." " They arrested Guillaume?" " Guillaume?" " Yes, Guillaume!" "That's why they came for me." "He betrayed me." " What'll happen to him?" " I don't know." " He'll be in prison until..." " Until what?" "Until he goes on trial." "We have to do something." " Isn't today Wednesday?" " Yes." "La Closerie!" "It's the salon today, come on." "Come on, Pablo." "I'm not going." "Why?" "I was released under surveillance." "I have to be careful, Fernande." "So you won't do anything." " It's your fault he was arrested." " It was his own fault!" "And that of his friend, that idiotic baron!" "I'm a victim!" "Very well." "Look after your Russians." "Suzanne." "ART CRITIC GUILLAUME APOLLINAIRE ARRESTED" ""Paris awoke this morning, with surprise and excitement to the news of a police arrest regarding the theft of the Phoenician statues and probably the Gioconda."" ""The detainee, of Russian-Polish origin, whose name is Wilhelm Kostrowitsky, is known in literature and art as Guillaume Apollinaire."" ""An anonymous letter put Judge Drioux on his trail and led to his arrest."" ""Despite pressure from the press and public opinion, the police will not give further details but say they are on the trail of an international gang of criminals whose aim is empty the museums of France."" ""Our family is from Minsk, in Lithuania." "Several of our forefathers served Russia." "Our father fought in the Crimean War and was decorated." "Later he retired to Rome and was private assistant to Pope Pius IX."" ""It turns out that this Mr. Apollinaire is actually called Krakamosky, or something similar." "The art critic and his associate the baron, a thief by profession, were on close terms" "and lived in total intimacy." "A fine world!"" "So you admit that you had in your home the statues stolen by Mr. Géry Piéret, known as "The Baron"." "It's true." "They were in Piéret's case." "I gave shelter to the man, the case and the statues inside it." "My only sin was to follow the rules of hospitality that I was taught." "Nevertheless, such a degree of indulgence surprises me." "The baron is, in a way, my creation." "He is certainly a strange character." "So, after studying him," "I made him the hero of one of my stories in "Heresiarch"." "I think it would have been literary ingratitude to abandon him." "Mr. Wilhelm Kostrowintzky, given the oral evidence presented here and, as the case has been definitively resolved, you are released on bail." "I've been dreaming of this moment for a week." "Max!" "I never thought I'd hug you so passionately!" "We'll have supper at the "Lapin Agile", all of us, like before." "Excuse me for a moment." "Pierre..." "Pierre?" " Or should I call you Judas?" " You're the Judas!" "Why?" "Why did you give my name?" "They were going crazy about the Gioconda!" "They interrogated the concierge to know if I brought home young boys or girls!" "They threatened to question my brother, Marie..." "My mother!" "It was Henri-Pierre." " Henri-Pierre?" " He sent the anonymous letter." "Marie knew, she tried to warn me but..." "Her mother will never accept me now." "After this, you'll write a load of verses, "The ill-loved". " "But I'll never be a French poet." "I'll never get nationality." "I've dedicated a character to you in "The Bestiary"." " Guillaume!" " Coming!" "Let's have a drink!" "Really?" "The book that would link our names in the future, remember?" "Yes, we'll do lots of things." ""How cruel are those who love us!" "All our blood is spilled for them!"" "Which animal is it?" "Come on, Guillaume!" "The flea." "About time!" "Come on, I know a place..." "I don't understand it." "I can't understand it." "What could I do for Guillaume?" "He was the stubborn one." "Fernande thinks I'm the cause of all her problems..." "She'll get over it." "I don't think so, not this time." "No?" "Art is the only salvation from the terror and the nausea that Darwinian nature produces in us." "What is it?" "Guillaume wrote that." "Nietzsche wrote it!" "Max, what's wrong with you?" "I've decided to convert to Christianity." "Aren't you a Jew?" "Every good Jew is, at heart, a future Christian." "I've discovered that the Kabala and occultism are linked to the true essence of Christianity." "Now I want to live like a good Catholic." "A good Catholic?" " Know what that means in Spain?" " No." "A good Catholic... is a man who has a nice house, servants, a family, and a car." "Are you sure you won't come?" "Yes, there's nothing in Céret for me." "But now I won't be jealous of Guillaume or Georges." "I understand you want to talk to him about Cubism." "But I still don't understand Cubism." "I'll never leave you." "I know you've grown up, but you'll always be my little boy." ""If I'm too heavy to go towards God, stretcher bearers, carry me." "And if you have no stretcher weave one from my sufferings. "" "Before being arrested and deported to Drancy concentration camp where he died in 1944." ""I love men not for what unites them but for what divides them." "And what interests me about hearts is what corrodes them. "" "Before being mortally wounded during World War I, to which he went as a volunteer in order to earn Franch nationalilty." "Childlike by nature, exiled, wife of Germans, and what else?" "Before expressing her wish to be buried with Guillaume Apollinaire's letters by her heart." ""Human stupidity is greater than the ocean and egoism harder than flint. "" "Before crossing the border and becoming a reference for future generations." ""The years I spent with you, Pablo, were the only happy time in my life." "I arrived without luggage and I'm leaving without luggage. "" "Before writing her "intimate memoirs", a summary of the events in her life." "All that we may have or desire will never make up for what we have lost." "Before disappearing totally off the map." ""The mediocre man copies, the Genius steals. "" "Before becoming the icon of the 20th Century." ""I am just a patriot who wanted to return our Madonna's smile to Italy. "" "Employee at the Louvre, after being caught red-handed, in Florence, two years later, with the Gioconda."