"DAD IVAN" "August 26th, 1972." "To my children Ivan and Maria Inés..." "I write this letter, afraid that I won't ever be able to explain what happened to me... because I left you when you still needed me very much... and because I didn't come to see you ever again." "Even though I know very well that mother is going to tell you the truth..." "I would prefer to leave you my own words in case I die... before you reach the age at which you can understand things well." "My father died on May 29th, 1977." "When I began to make this film I knew some things." "What I had heard, which wasn't a clear description of the facts... always turned into the image of a very heroic person." "I once said that I would rather have a live father than a dead hero... because I spent my life in Mexico, and the times I went to Argentina... meeting people that saw me as the daughter of a hero." "I always remember him as... a good guy." "As a guy who didn't..." "Who had a good mood." "Who always helped." "He was never involved in unnecessary or superfluous things." "Nothing like that." "Your father was a man... very sure of himself... always believing that he didn't make one mistake." "And well, you have to pay a high price for being that way." "I really feel that... what I miss the most is his gaze." "The gaze of your parents confirms you." "It makes you, it constructs you... and that's like growing up in the dark." "I met your father..." "I believe it was in the summer..." "It must have been in '57." "It was amusing because your grandparents... my father and mother, would go to the country side... and they were very afraid that the we, the girls, would be left alone so your father would come with us... he would spend the night over with us... and as your father's father said, he acted like Clark Gable." "Like who?" "Like Clark Gable, as we would say in Argentina." "That's where the romance began." "We got married in 1963, on August of 63... and during the first years of our life together... we shared our teaching work in the Saint Francis of Asis School." "And when I was thinking about this interview, I remembered... that one of our projects was to create our own small school... maybe in Patagonia, or some place far away... a project we shared as part of our love of teaching." "I remember perfectly when I began turning into a revolutionary." "It was a very cold winter day, in which a boy in primary school fell down... almost frozen, at the door of the building where the classrooms were located." "I was about 8 or 9." "I noticed that all he had on was his school smock on top of a torn shirt." "And all of a sudden I felt very ashamed for my warm clothes... for wearing shoes and wool socks." "I felt as if I had taken the clothes from this boy." "His being so cold was an actual suftering for me." "His purple hands and face, and his stift joints frightened me like death itself." ""We Argentinians are rich, because Argentina is a very rich country,"... said the teacher, and she cited great production figures... for wheat, meat, sugar, and very high production rankings... among the countries of the world." "Nevertheless I knew school mates who ate nothing... before walking 5 kilometers to school... and who kept hunger away until evening with only a roasted sweet potato... which their parents would give to them before they left for school." "He was a lot more..." "He had a much sweeter character." "More tender, much more tender than I." "Thirty years have gone by since then." "We are thirty years older." "Probably thirty kilos heavier." "May be we have had thirty more disillusions." "The last class he gave us was on the 24th of November 1964... and in one of my private notebooks..." "I remember because I read it this morning..." "I said, "Iván came today wearing a blue jacket and gray pants..." ""and I would have preferred him to wear black ones."" "The image that I have is that of the spotless gentleman who came to teach us." "I don't keep memories in notebooks like her, criticism or classes we had..." "Before I came I quickly checked the notebook." "I found excellent notes in all of them... which suggests that I mustn't have had any problems, nor was there any indication... that he had to reprimend me or tell me anything." "I do remember... that I was in love with him." "The love of a teenager... the teacher who arrived with his two books under his arm... who arrived spotless to teach us... and who allowed us to interact, dialogue... who wasn't the authority figure before us... and who we listened to, fascinated." "I was a teacher and director of a high school where I learned that in the capitalist system... education is an instrument for distortion of minds... for systematic indoctrination of children and young in order to turn them into... remote control led puppets." "In that job I learned many more things about human beings..." "I loved and respected those young people, and I felt loved and respected by them." "I tried to expand their sense of freedom and to stop the things that... deformed them too much." "During the last hour of the evening of June 27th... the already tense situation within the Three Armed Forces was aggravated... which triggered various meetings of the Military High Command and the Executive Power." "The grave institutional crisis culminated with the separation of Doctor Arturo Illia... from his position as President of the Nation." "While this was happening the troops were taking over key places of the city... to maintain an order which had never been altered." "After the fall of Illia an event took place which served to define... a change in the way student groups acted." "They not only established alliances... with the workers unions and occupied key places... but they also determined that violence was not the sole providence of... those who controlled the power." "To respond to violence with violence and it was the death of Santiago Pampillon that triggered it." "My involvement in those years, after 1966... was in an attack group during the dictatorship of Onganía." "Street battles and massive protest." "With other four other comrades I was a leader of the..." "Santiago Pampillon Resistance Command." "This is the capital of Cordoba, downtown, Rivera Indarte and Rioja Street." "The metallurgic workers have made a barricade here and have started fires." "The Police force is currently receding." "So far there are two wounded." "Flores, with a bullet in his right leg and Hernández wounded in the shoulder, both hospitalized in serious condition." "I think there is one more wounded Is that so?" " Yes" "Three wounded so far." "While I was in the University of Philosophy the fascist groups arrived to attack the students... and then we got together in protest and went to take over the Dean's oftice." "Well, I usually arrived home around 9 in the evening imagine I arrived at 11... and I told your father: what happened is we took over the Dean's oftice because the fascists attacked." "And your father said, "Freedom or slight wounds" Do you understand?" "In what was neighborhood, among my friends." "There was a group of guys, with long hair." "They made leather handcrafts and all that." "The one who supported that group, and who later became great comrades with him some are dead, others are still alive was your father." "They made leather things, in some room, listening to really loud music..." "I don't know what they were listening to... and he came in and said, "Were did you bring me?" ""Wat is this..." ""The Jimmy Hendrix Command?" And well, this is where he met them." "I met him during the time in which... part of that student group was changing... from what was a student group into... what became the foundation... of the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Cordoba." "On one hand it was "Homeland or slight wounds..."" "which was the University or the guild... and on the other was really "Homeland or death."" "Your father was one of the founders." "He was the person who had the clearest objectives, strategies... and a sense of organization." "He was one of the most outstanding theoreticians we had." "Possibly the most outstanding." "I was closer to the FAR movement than to Montoneros." "But in the end I decided to work with that movement because there was no other." "Since I didn't formally belong to the movement, I wasn't obliged to respond... exactly to things, but I did do a lot..." "I did a lot of necessary things." "And do you know why I did them?" "Because I had a good cover, see this white hair," "And looking like a lady, a lady who's going to the market to buy cabbage and carrots..." "I did things that may be a young person wouldn't have done... but I know why I did them." "I had asked him to let me know when he was going on an operation." "Not where or what..." "Knowing meant to me that I knew when I had real reasons... to be worried, and with the anguish of waiting, and of being unaware, I was always in that state of mind." "Those two years were both wonderful and difficult for me and for mom who shared some secrets with me, and all the worries." "We understood what the possible outcomes were." "We loved and respected each other a lot." "We were both revolutionaries... but we knew that she could never follow me in the form of the struggle I had chosen." "She always had a constitutional impossibility to exert violence." "I asked a lot about my father." "And my mother would say that he had had to go away on a trip... but that he loved me very much and that he would contact us as soon as he could... that he would call, or write or come to visit me." "I was very frightened when I saw weapons in the house... or large sums of money... which were hidden there." " Were you ever in an operation with him?" " Yes" "And how was it?" "Wat do you mean, "How was it?" I can't." "I don't know how to tell you, because... it's all so demystified, isn't it?" "Some people make things sound simple." "I don't believe that any one can hate violence more than I, children, believe me." "Even more so, now that I have been forced to exert it over such a long time... and after seeing my most beloved comrades fall during the struggle." "When all the subterfuges and all the lies have expired... because the people have known them all... when all the traps and lies have been used, the truth rises up." "And the truth of the capitalist system is violence." "Violence is essential to this system responsible for hunger and pain... for the humiliation of our people." "Only brutal force can hold it together." "To be honest, I remember he had a certain attraction for militarism." "Without a doubt he was an experienced leader... and as I know, a bold man." "I mean of great audacity..." "A man of great personal courage." "Tell me about the Sánchez thing." "The operation against Sanchez..." "Let me tell you, I have the version..." "I know that Gabrielita went dressed as a schoolgirl." "I remember she was small." "She was the one who signaled that... the General's vehicle was coming out." "Everything after that was a chase... and to shoot him with a FAL rifle." "Tell me about the day he went underground" "Ooh!" "That was an unforgettable day." "Every Sunday the three of us... you, Ivan and I, went to my parents home... to the Quinta Santa Ana." "On that Sunday we had arranged like on all Sundays for you father to come... and pick us up at about 8 or 8:30 to go to the house in Barrio Jardin Espinoza, where we lived." "And about 6 in the evening there was a knock on the door..." "I opened it, and there was a man... he tells me he's looking for the teacher Roqué." "And I said: "What for?"" "And he said: "Well..." "I'm looking for him, you know I have to speak with him alone."" "As if to make it apparent that there was something clandestine." "So I understood right away that he was a policeman." "I said: "But what could you have to say to him that you can't tell me?"" "Then I felt desperate, maybe your father will be coming for us." "And the only telephone that I had, that I knew was the only way to communicate with your father... was Pardo's." " Do you remember me, from when I was a kid?" " Yes, yes, I remember." "You were very small, but I remember." "They bothered me playfully because sometimes I would rather... play w ith you... and not participate in some parts of the grown up meetings." "Yes, yes I remember." "So I called him and I said to him..." ""Flaco, I want to talk with Iván, I have a problem with the children and I want to talk with him."" "And he said, "Don't worry Azucena, he'll call you right away."" "And in a little bit your father called." "So then I told him:" "Look Iván, Ivancito has a bit of a fever..." "I want to stay here so my father can take a look at him." "Tonight I won't sleep at home." "Don't come for us." ""Fine, fine." "Stay there," he said..." ""I won't come to look for you."" "And about... ten, ten thirty, my father and mother took us three home..." "Your father without a doubt had been there and had taken a suitcase and some clothes." "And that was the transition into clandestine life." "And then I realized I had made a mistake, because I called Pardo's place... from my parents' home phone... that same night they searched Pardo's house." "Faced with the necessity to keep them from detaining us... we made the decision... to move to another place and to travel from Córdoba to Tucumán." " You and him alone?" " Yes" "Was it daytime?" "No, I think it was at night." "But I really don't remember exactly." " Is it really important?" " Yes, it is for me." "For me, it's an... important turning point..." "The moment in which family life can no longer be reconciled with political activity." "Wat was your great difterence, what kept you from being part of the movement?" "My rejection of violence." "I do not tolerate violence in any form." "I know that violence exists in many ways." "In the most subtle ways." "I know that there is violence in all human difterences... but I could not practice violence." "Not even against the ones who have arbitrarily practiced it." "Because I always felt that it was sacrificing your life... and I thought life is to be lived, it's not to be sacrificed." "Because I believe that the daily struggle is worth it..." "With your children..." "With what you do..." "With what you think..." "With what you build..." "And that this was ak project that led to death." "I'm against it, and I rebel against that." "And I remember saying:" ""I'm not going underground just because I'm your wife."" "Because you don't gounderground because you are someone's wife." "We didn't speak of a rupture, but we did confirm that... his going underground was his decision." "Not mine." "Something that not all of the couples did." "We didn't see this as the end of our relationship either." "Your mother was always great in this regard." "I had very contradictory feelings." "I both admired her and she upset me." "The worst part is that no one was willing to tell me... that Iván already had another companion." "My friends would tell me indirectly..." ""You have to live your lif e, you have to go out, you have to start your life again."" "But I was still emotionally attached to Ivan." "I admired her capacity to maintain an image... that in some ways I saw... wasn't the image of a human being, with strengths and weaknesses." "At the beginning of '72, after about 6 or 8 months of being underground... your father was able to come to Cordoba." "I don't know if he was in Cordoba..." "I don't know where he was." "It was my first encounter with my husband in over 6 or 8 months... in a moment I stretched my hand out and took Ivan's hand... and I saw how Ivan became agitated with this." "Afterwards we went to a place, a small hotel." "You had a nap, and we talked... your father asked me if I had another relationship, and I said no." "And he said of course for you it's more difticult, I do have a new relationship." "I felt as if the world crumbled down." "Since I had not accepted it as a real separation... not only physical but as a break up of a couple." "I don't even remember how we got to Córdoba." "I only remember that I had a terrible night... a night of total anguish." "And I also remember something that..." "I think I was denying to myself... admitting that Iván already had another companion... because when he told me "I have a new relationship," my question was..." ""They told me that Gabriela Yofre went underground, is it true?"" "I didn't think or know, but it was my question." "And your father answered "Yes." But he didn't say, "She's my companion."" "All the fabric of my life fell apart when your father came around." "Because it meant to feel that the bond with my husband still existed as a bond." "And at the same time Iván was with Gabriela, and Iván had another son." "I always cared a lot for Martín." "I was able to separate my pain as an abandoned woman from my love for Martín." "I was worried, and I said so, that Martín didn't speak." "He spoke a language that was only his." "And you know what else happened I don't know what you remember of Iván." "Iván was a person with discipline and I can see him here with a very strong discipline and a capacity to hide his feelings... as if being a revolutionary was part of being in control." "There was a big fight with your father, while he was detained in Devoto... because he wanted me to take you to Devoto..." "I opposed that, you were too little... and you were still terrified from the tim e they broke into the house... and you saw how one of the soldiers put a gun to my head... and whenever you saw a soldier, even if he was a conscript, you grasped me." "And I wrote a letter to your father, saying that I could not let you go through all the controls... to go into Devoto's Jail to see him... that I opposed that you go throug hall that." "Obviously he was the highest authority that had fallen, that was in Jail." "And he answered that I was a bourgeois, and that I didn't understand anything... and that the sons of the revolutionaries went there and sang the..." "International Socialist hymn, or the Montoneros hymn, I don't know... and I answered him that I was not just the person that was in charge of you... but the one who was in charge, and that I couldn't permit that while I was raising you... he could lay down the ideological line." "Wen we were living in Ramos, in a house... sim ple, but with a big backyard... one day I saw that a tree there had cuts from an axe..." "I asked Ivan, "What happened to that tree?"" "And he tells me, "Well, sometimes I hit it," kind of avoiding me." "And afterwards Gabriela told me that every tim e someone was missing or a comrade... was killed I imagine that it could have been someone close to the Commander... then he would hit the tree." "I wanted to talk with him." "We began a process of dissidence, with a lot of opposition, and well..." "I thought he would at least say, "Hey, have you gone crazy?" "Wat's happened to you?"" "That's what I kept inside, I never saw him again." "Every time I remember your father, I can say... his leaving us was very painful for me." "It hurt me very much, because he was the father I wanted for you... the father I had chosen." "His leaving me was very painful... but it hurts more for our children than for me... because I believed that he was the father my children needed... but I never doubted his honesty in our relationship." "I knew that when it was broken up it was broken, but while it existed, it was real." "And it hurts, it still hurts me a lot." "It hurts because..." "Because your father was essentially a man of very good feelings." "I think he showed this above all through his caring for children... his caring for animals, in how he related with living things." "And it hurts me because... maybe we could have had a lot of discussions about your education..." "I don't idealize the situation, I know we could have discussed many things... but I know... we hardly doubted each other, the truthfulness with which we spoke." "I loved our home" "There was nothing I liked more than playing with Maria Ines or having a barbecue in the yard, moisten it with lot of wine, and sharing it with you... with friends, and uncles." "Choosing the best pieces for you, my little one, and for your Mom..." "Nothing made me feel more important than teaching you your first things about the world." "Nothing made me happier than to play with you." "To go out with mom." "To the movies, eat something somewhere and come back home... not too late, to make sure you were well tucked in and to give you the last kiss... before bed time." "I suppose that I never stopped asking... because one day mother told me I could write him a letter." "And this was painful for me, because some time after I had written that letter..." "I found it in one of my mother's drawers." "It was as if my mother had deceived me... because it was important for me to know I had some way to communicate with him." "I am investigating the difterent versions of his death." "I would like to know the one you know." "I have the impression that it was an elderly couple who was the cover for the house." "The man was detained." "I don't know if he was able to let his family know." "That I don't know..." "His wife, I don't know." "But it was apparently a good cover, because they were an elderly couple." "They lived in the lower part of that house and in top part, I believe it had two bed rooms... and a big dining room, we lived there." "I lived there with my family and later this is where Lino lived." "And does "The Uncle" mean something to you?" ""The Uncle" was a nickname, for him." "We called him the uncle, the aunt They both lived in the house." "I was kid napped on October 14th, 1976." "I met Lino, Julio Roqué, in 1972." "He was Lino to me, do you understand?" "It was in a house, where at that time there was, among other things... the documentation service of what at that time was the Buenos Aires Wing." "of the North Column of the F.A.R." "The day that Lino fell.." "was a day of much turmoil in the School of Mechanics." "Inside the detention place, right?" "One of our comrades who had fallen some days before had broken up... and had given out some information." "From some of that information The Uncle was revealed." " Did you know my father?" " Yes, yes, yes." "And I have..." "Yes, I remember him..." "I can tell you how I met him." "Your father was responsible for the Montoneros." "So your father... first I had other comrades, they would rotate." "They stayed in my house... in my house, where I received them." "One of the missions I had was to contact others... who wanted to talk with the National Command." "So..." "I went out to look for the comrade... the one that had to speak with your father... and I had a small accident, just a scratch." "Now, later on, I understand that the accident was not by chance." "That scratch delayed me... until another vehicle came, and I saw armed people... people that people that were cufted... that were in shackles, they had pointed me out." "Because it's painful but it's the truth." "In that moment The Uncle broke up... and they found out that Lino was at the house, in Haedo." "Then they organized... another group in a hurry, to capture Lino." "So then I say, "They knew it all."" "I tell them, "Well you..." ""What I'm saying is true..." "There's no one in the house... just my family and I...", thinking that they had picked them up..." "So when they tell me, "No, in your house is..." I thought of my family... because you think about your family." "I have two small kids." "At that moment it came to me and I thought "They didn't raid the house..."" "See?" "First because of the time... because from Haedo... near Haedo to the ESMA... because of the time the house had to have been raided." "To the appointment it was a short distance... and I don't remember well if we had said thirty minutes as a maximum... or thirty five, something like that, it wasn't much." "In any case when the house fell..." "I had my family and your dad." "There was a phone call and a sequence gets organized... first one of the kids goes out, then another kid goes out... then The Uncle's wife goes to look for the kids." "Wen she goes out, Lino also goes out." "What happened then is what we all know..." "Well, those were difticult moments, it was there where..." "I... he resisted..." "I mean..." "The house was... hmmm?" "In terms let's say this is..." "The repressive forces found it and well, hmmm?" "The statements of the people who participated in this operation... say that a subofficial of the police force, which was one of the operative groups... tried to trap Lino from the back..." "Lino catches on and punches him away and runs into the house again." "He runs in and throws a grenade..." "When the grenade explodes it wounds another subofficial on the foot, and a shootout starts." "Lino was shooting from the first floor of the house." "Wat they said is that apparently Lino was shooting with a machine gun... and the ones who were shooting out front had shotguns..." "Apparently Lino had more fire power at that moment." "Afterwards another ofticial who participated in the kidnapping in this intended kidnapping... states that he was trying to enter the house through the backyard... when he sees that Lino is trying to go out through the backyard, and shoots him with a pistol." "He states that when Lino sees that he is shooting only with a pistol... the shot of a small gun, a hand gun... he tries to go out covering himself with the machine gun fire." "At that moment apparently a subofficial of the marines arrives with a heavy rifle... and starts shooting and forces Lino to turn back." "So he sees his intended escape frustrated... and he is unable to break the barricade they had put around the house... and goes back into the house." "This was a firefight that lasted a very long time." "Maybe it lasted hours." "During that time, you were able to see fire inside the house." "Possibly Lino was destroying... materials from the organization... that would have been dangerous in the hands of these army bands... of the Armed Forces." "In a moment there is a large explosion in the house." "The fire was... very large at this time..." "Apparently this is when they go in." "Well, the statements say they find Lino." "They say that he had committed suicide with a cyanide tablet... judging from the characteristics that are left on the body... that dark cyanotic look, right?" "I also got the famous anecdote from Miguel Angel Lauletta... the ex-Montonero who crossed over to the Marines." "Wo by the way, according to some testimonies that I have from some survivors of the ESMA... asked to participate in the capture operation... which culminated in the death of Roqué... and that he went wearing a military uniform and that he asked for a .38" "and opened fire on the front of the house or the back, I don't know... but that it was a balcon y and not a window... which apparently Iván had not looked out of much... it wasn't the place from where Iván had been shooting... but apparently he shoots that place, with the Marines." "Afterwards, when news of the death is out... that pathetic character boasts... about the death of Roqué." "He says, "It's good that this daughter of a whore is dead,"... feminizing him in a derogatory way." "It's so terri ble, so nauseating, the expression of this pig... that even the head of operations of the group 332 of the ESMA:" "Jorge Perren... the "Cougar" Perren, says "I don't celebrate the death of an enemy that dies... fighting that way." " Did you see the body?" " I don't remember seeing the body... what is a sure thing is that they must have incinerated the body... just like they incinerated the bodies of the ones that arrived lifeless or died... in the ESMA during torture." "Wat always tormented me about my father's death was the image of him... having blown himself up with a grenade or bomb." "I was tormented with the image of a body blown to pieces... of an unrecognizable body." " The description of the operation puts you in a very unfavorable light" " Yes." "Do you remember the anecdote?" "Let me see, what you are saying?" "I don't understand what you're trying to say." "It's uncomfortable to be..." "Sure, of course." "But, well..." "I'm not going to lie to you..." "I haven't spoken to any one... that had fallen or that had been there on those dates, someone who had fallen around those exact dates or a little bit before that date... although there is an anecdote that keeps being repeated" "through a lot of people's stories... that have been witness to this story, one way another... where it said that you proposed a toast to my father's death." "That's absurd, totally absurd." "It's the same thing I had said before, why should I describe myself as a fatso... with a mustache and greasy fingernails?" "It's the same thing, what's the sense?" "There wasn't a brotherhood... between the majority of those who where being held..." "Wo was I going to propose a toast to?" "It's very sinister but it's interesting to think that someone could construct that idea." "I live with the pressure of... letting others know what happens to me, with this." "And finally it's something very... very much my own with my father" "It's as if I couldn't tell anyone else..." "Wen you decide to take a path I believe that... he knew it well..." "Maybe, for example, in my case..." "I saw it more romantically..." "I don't know..." "Afterward, we continued to learn little by little." "But.. it's a hard..." "We knew it was a hard path to take..." "Also, I think that none of us could imagine that we would survive." "It's not that we wanted to die..." "We didn't want to die at all, we wanted very much to live... but truthfully even the statistics would frighten you..." "There was a phrase that he had, he said, "This is the last revolution I will be a part of"." ""I'm kind of tired, this is the last revolution I will be a part of."" "Sometimes we used to look at the younger ones, the smallest, and everything... and how the movement had grown, and we thought we couldn't lose." "We thought we had all the power to win." "And well, we were wrong and we will see how this process continues." "I was never able to tell my father not to go." "He never gave me the opportunity, he always left during the night." "Without me knowing that he was leaving." "I was never able to say goodbye Wo can I complain to?" "Our story is not easy..." "Well like a story, it's a story of drama, about a lot of sacrifice... a lot of pain... and also of a lot of happiness..." "But... we didn't live it like that I lived it with much pain in the end." "Because I wasn't convinced of what I was doing... but when I was sure of what I wanted to do..." "I lived it abundantly and with tranquility." "And I believe that he always lived it lik e that, at least until the last time I saw him." "I have nothing from him" "I haven't a grave..." "There's no body." "I haven't a place to put all of this." "I thought that this film would serve as a grave, but I realize that it isn't... that it's never enough." "And I can't go on with it anymore." "I don't want to know any more details." "I want to finish all of this." "I want to be able to live without this load every day... and it seems that I can not." "I liked his eyes." "I liked his hands." "I liked the way he walked with a loose body." "And above all I liked his tenderness." "His capacity to look at the other, his capacity to feel with the other." "I tell you that if I was the one to die..." "I would have wanted to die as he died." "Maybe, what I know are legends..." "I know some versions of the soldiers that were there... and they spoke of his integrity, of what he resisted, of how he fought... they had to demolish the house..." "He truly believed in what he did and he was consistent with that." "And I don't know if you could expect more of life." "I made this film to be able to understand why he had done what he did... and who he was in the middle of all of this... and I believe that I understood it, more or less." "But the question will alwa s be there... of whether he ever questioned himself." "Even though I know it hurt him." "Even though I feel that his loss is so great." "The question will always stay with me." "Well children, now that I have told you all of this, I 'm at peace... and if I was to die before I see you again, be sure that I will fall with dignity... and that you will never have to be ashamed of me." "I'm going to send this letter to mom... this way she will decide when it is time for you to read it." "You must surely love her very much, because she deserves it." "I love and respect her very much... and I'm sorry for all the pain I must have caused her." "A big hug and a lot of kisses from your disconsolate father... who never forgets you but who does not regret what he is doing." "Remember..." "FREEDOM OR DEATH, NEVER SLAVES." "DAD IVAN."