"(BELL CHIMES)" "(GUNSHOT)" "(TWO MORE SHOTS)" "(MAN) I know how to handle your type!" "(THUD!" ")" "Well, old faithful, that's your shooting for the day." "If we haven't run up at least two rabbits, we deserve to go home empty-handed." "Yeah, still, blessed are they who expect nothing, for they shall not be disappointed." "Fewer things in life give a man more pleasure than hunting." "It satisfies his primitive nature." "Striding through the woods, picking up his kill." "Come on, old faithful, there's plump rabbits waiting for the frying-pan." "If this can had four legs and a tail, we'd be eating it tonight!" "Clean through the heart." "For rice cake, I've done him in!" "Coooor!" "A harmless potshot at a rabbit and I'm a murderer!" "A killer!" "Mother always said I'd come to a bad end." "What in Hades were you doing here anyway?" "!" "I can't say that I've seen you around here before." "No." "If you're going to get yourself shot, do it where you're known!" "Mr Harry Worp, 87 Maple Avenue, Boston, Massachusetts." "Well, Worp, you're a long way from home." "And by the looks of it, you won't get back for Christmas." "Gonna have a cold, hard winter." "You might keep here a long time, an awful long time." "Too long for me, Harry." "Yes..." "Captain Wiles?" "!" "Yes, ma'am?" "What seems to be the trouble, Captain?" "Well, it's what you might call an unavoidable accident." "He's dead." "Yes." "I would say that he was." "Of course, that's an unprofessional opinion." "Do you... do you know him, Miss Gravely?" "No." "Doesn't live around here." "Well, he died around here." "That's what counts now." "Embarrassing." "What do you plan to do with him, Captain?" "Miss Gravely, without cutting the hem off truth garment,... ..I'm gonna hide him, cover him up, forget him." "Are you never going to inform the police, Captain?" "No." "Forget you saw him, Miss Gravely." "Chase it out of your mind, for heaven's sake!" "It was an accident." "He was poking around the clearing and I thought he was a rabbit or something." "It was a human error." "Now please, don't." "Don't say anything to anybody, Miss Gravely." "Do as you think best, Captain." "I'm sure you must have met many similar situations in your travels in foreign lands." "Yeah, I've seen much worse things." "I certainly won't say anything." "Much worse." "I remember on the Orinoco, we had a Turk, a great big Turk, running amuck, with a machete." "Captain, if I were going to hide an accident, I shouldn't delay." "Oh!" "You're right as rain, Miss Gravely." "You know something?" "I'm glad I meet you today." "I feel better for telling somebody as warm, tender, understanding as yourself." "On the contrary, Captain, it... it..." "I'm certainly glad if I helped you." "Perhaps you would care to come over for some blueberry muffins and coffee later on." "High-bush blueberries!" "Well, this is certainly something of an interesting surprise." "Perhaps a touch of elderberry wine." "Oh!" "After all, we've been neighbours for nearly three years now." "We've never exchanged social calls." "Alright." "It's high time I paid a call." "What time?" "Oh, say... early this afternoon?" "I'll be there, with a clean shirt and a hungry face." "Do that." "You'd better be going along." "Mustn't be an accessory after the fact." "You are a considerate man, Captain Wiles." "Goodbye." "Goodbye." "Overthere,Mommy!" "Hereheis ,Mommy,hereheis !" "What did I tell you, Mommy?" "!" "Don't touch it, Arnie!" "There he is." "No!" "It can't be!" "Harry!" "Harry!" "Thank Providence, the last of Harry!" "Who's Providence?" "A very good friend." "Don't you know who it is?" "You said Harry." "Can't you remember?" "Why don't he get up and do something?" "He's... asleep." "He's in a deep sleep." "A deep wonderful sleep." "How'd he hurt his head?" "Putting it where it wasn't wanted would be my guess." "Will it get better?" "Not if we're lucky." "Let's run home and I'll make you some lemonade." "Will lemonade put me in a wonderful, deep sleep?" "No, but it's better than no lemonade." "I don't understand." "Never mind." "You just forget you saw this man." "Is there a way to forget?" "Just think of something else." "I'll try, Mommy." "That's a good boy, Arnie." "Let's run home and get that lemonade." "She won't care what I do with him." "Couldn't have had more people here if I'd sold tickets!" "What's the big attraction, I wonder?" "!" "This could turn out to be the luckiest day of my life!" "Might as well sit here till the rest of the world comes to pay their last respects." "Sooner or later one'll be the deputy sheriff." "(MAN SINGS TUNEFULLY:" ""Train to Tuscaloosa")" "(SINGING CONTINUES)" "(SINGING CONTINUES)" "(HEARTY SINGING)" "(HUMS)" "(RESUMES SINGING)" "(DOG BARKS IN RESPONSE)" "(STOPS SINGING)" "Hello, Mr Marlow." "Wiggy, Wiggy!" "You haven't sold a painting!" "All my pictures in the same place." "There's so few cars." "They don't seem to..." "The cider takes their attention." "Cider, indeed!" "Throw it away!" "Drink it!" "No, I hate cider." "Not a picture sold." "Sorry, Mr Marlow." "Let's get a look at your new one." "Hold it up." "What good would it do to show it to you?" "You don't deserve!" "to see it." "How am I gonna eat?" "Mr Wiggs always used to thump his stomach when he got mad." "He busted something inside once." "(MOO!" ")" "Do you think we'd do any better on Fifth Avenue?" "If there's more people there." "Lots of people." "Hundreds and thousands and billions of people." "It might be better, then." "But what sort of people?" "What breed?" "I'll tell you." "Little people!" "Little people with hats on!" "How are your cigarettes?" "(CAR ENGINE STARTS UP)" "I'll buy the other half tomorrow." "What does your son do with those old cars he works on?" "Sells them." "Doesn't make much, but he needs the money." "Doesn't he get paid for being deputy sheriff?" "Police work?" "He gets paid by the arrest, I think!" "Oh, Mr Marlow, it's wonderful!" "I've been in a tortured mood lately." "What is it?" "Good old Wiggy, my sternest critic." "I don't understand your work but I think it's beautiful." "So does Mrs Rogers." "Oh?" "You talk about me?" "Well, I..." "Pretty woman with a little boy, isn't she?" "I brought up your name once when we were talking about strange people." "Huh?" "Er, strangers." "Oh." "People she hadn't met yet." "And what does the pretty little thing say about me?" "Nothing." "I think we'd better discuss business." "Here, my shopping list." "I'll go in and start putting it up." "Say, Wiggy, how do you spell Tuscaloosa?" "Sam?" "Hi, Calvin." "You hear any shooting?" "Nope." "I did." "And there shouldn't be any shooting' around here." "Why?" "It's posted land, that's why." "Why's that?" "Cos I posted it." "What have you got against people shooting?" "Let off a little steam." "Bullets and guns are dangerous." "They kill things." "No-one around here could hit a freight car with a cannon." "I guess you're right, Sam." "All the same, the law's the law." "I got a good mind to scout around and find out who's doin' the shootin', level a little fine." "Pick up a little piece work?" "Well, if I can do anything to make it any harder for you, let me know." "(HORN PARPS/ENGINE CLATTERS)" "How do you want your bacon, Mr Marlow?" "What were you saying?" "I asked how you want your bacon." "Sliced." "Where's Calvin?" "Off somewheres unimportant." "What a wonderful day!" "So was yesterday, but you didn't mention it to me." "What did you want Calvin for?" "These marvellous pictures!" "Someone told me they were yours." "Why don't you sell them?" "Make a lot of money." "Never thought of that." "I have to consider it." "That song, you sing it beautifully." "You wrote it yourself, of course." "What do you want to borrow?" "I think people need encouragement sometimes, don't you, Mr Marlow?" "How d'you know my name?" "It's on the pictures." "It's not meant to be readable!" "You can tell it's not meant to be." "Very, very, professional." "Don't you think, Mrs Wiggs?" "Well, Miss Gravely, all I know is nobody buys then." "Thanks for your encouragement, Miss Gravely." "I wonder how you know MY name?" "Easy, Wiggy just said it." "Wiggy!" "What a perfectly ridiculous little nickname!" "Do you mind if I call you Wiggy, Mrs Wiggs?" "Not if you pay your bills on time." "Alright, Mr Marlow, bacon, beans, cabbage, sugar, salt, tea, margarine... $1.95." "And half a pack of cigarettes." "Oh, yes. 10 cents. $2.05." "That much?" "I don't seem to be able to find the..." "I know." "As soon as we sell some of your paintings." "Just a minute, Mr Marlow." "Let me make my position clear" " Ssshh!" "What do you think?" "I think it'll hold coffee." "Would you try it, Mr Marlow?" "Put your finger through the handle, please." "How about the size?" "What about the handle?" "I mean, does it fit?" "Is it the right finger size?" "It's my finger size." "I'll take it." "15 cents." "And the saucer?" "10." "That seems a fair price." "What's the finger size got to do with it?" "Er, I wanted to be certain it would fit a man, a certain size man." "A man?" "A certain somebody is coming over to my cottage this afternoon." "Not really?" "For coffee and blueberry muffins." "Why, you old social butterfly, you!" "Old?" "Figuratively speaking." "Think we've got a near-sighted cider customer." "How old do you think I am, young man?" "Er, 50." "How old do YOU think you are?" "42!" "I can show you my birth certificate!" "You'd have to show more than that to convince a man." "What do you mean?" "!" "You have to show your character, the inner self, the hidden qualities!" "The true Miss Gravely." "Sensitive, young in feeling." "Timeless with love and understanding." "I can do it!" "At least, I think I can do it." "Do what?" "I'll go and see what - At a time like this?" "!" "Where are your scissors?" "Outside." "We're going to cut her hair!" "Cut it short, bring it up to date." "Make a nice romantic styling." "Take ten years off your birth certificate." "How are you fixed for ribbon?" "Should be some around somewhere." "Make-up?" "I think so..." "Nothing cheap or obvious." "Just youth, gentility, character." "I'll get the scissors." "You find the other things." "Ah, here they are." "Excuse me, young man, I " "Oh, well." "Alright, Ernest, let's go." "Well, always grow back, I guess." "(CAR DRAWS UP/HORN PARPS)" "Here's Calvin." "Is he alone?" "!" "Yep." "Guess he didn't sell his car." "Hey!" "Would you mind getting out of my picture?" "Next thing you know, they'll be televising the whole thing!" "This your body, little man?" "Oh, don't turn me in!" "It was an accident." "Just an accident." "I thought he was a rabbit or a pheasant." "It could have happened to you." "Suppose we straighten this out." "I guess it's the only way." "First thing I saw this morning was a robin, drunk as a hoot owl from eating fermented cherries." "I knew somebody was in trouble." "What I didn't know was that it was me." "The larder was empty and I got to thinking about fried rabbit..." "It stands to reason they can't touch you for it." "Nothing these days stands to reason." "It was accidental." "An act of God, perhaps." "Be grateful that you were able to do your share in accomplishing the destiny of a follow being." "Suppose it was written in the book of heaven that he was to die at this particular time,... ..and at this particular place." "And suppose that the actual accomplishing of his departure had been bungled." "Some problem." "Perhaps it was to be a thunderbolt and there was no thunder available." "Then you come along and shoot him and heaven's will is done and destiny fulfilled." "Your conscience is quite clear." "Nothing to worry about." "Sammy, I haven't got a conscience." "It's not heaven that's worrying me." "I don't expect I'll ever have to face it." "None of those noble thing you said." "Nothing like that." "What is it?" "Me." "It's me that's worrying me." "Me and my future life." "I know the police and their suspicious ways." "You're guilty until proven innocent." "I want nothing more to do with them." "Bury him, I say, and have done with him." "He's no good to anyone now." "Lay him to rest." "Put him under the sod." "Forget him." "I never did it and you never saw him." "What about the other people who saw him?" "The woman and little boy?" "Miss Gravely and the tramp, the doctor reading the book." "All of them?" "Well, nobody was interested, I tell you." "Nobody ever cared until you came along." "That's what you think." "Suppose they start to care after you bury him?" "I can't wait for people to start caring!" "I don't want an accident to turn into a career!" "Suppose that woman who called him Harry decides she loves him after all?" "She was downright hysterical with delight." "Hmm?" "What was she like?" "Pretty as a rainbow." "Wish I was two years younger!" "And a little boy?" "About four or five." "Got to be Mrs Rogers and her son." "What do you say we slip him under, now you've finished drawing him?" "Hey?" "Discuss the details later." "I don't like it." "The authorities like to know when people die." "Alright, Sammy." "Forget it." "You cut off home." "I killed him and I'll look after his remains." "Drag him around the countryside the rest of the day?" "I'll do my best." "That's all a man can do." "If you're not careful, you will get a murder charge." "Matter of fact, I'm beginning to suspect something myself." "See?" "!" "If an artist suspects the worst, what will the police think?" "That envelope with his name and address." "You should mail him back home." "Have you forgotten who carries the mail to the station every night?" "Calvin Wiggs, the deputy sheriff!" "Yes, you're right." "I'll tell you what we'll do." "Tell you what..." "We'll find out how well Mrs Rogers know this man, and whether she's going to notify the police." "Well, what good will that do?" "A lot of good." "If she doesn't intend to notify the authorities, I personally will help you bury Harry." "Oh, Sammy, you've signed on for the cruise!" "What time is it?" "!" "About noon." "I've got go home and spruce up." "I've a date with Miss Gravely!" "Not you...?" "You're not the one?" "!" "Oh, Sam!" "She could do a lot worse, you know!" "Couldn't do any better." "Just think, you'd be establishing a precedent." "I'm not establishing nothing." "I'm going over for muffins and coffee by her own invitation." "And possibly some elderberry wine." "Do you realise you'll be the first man to, er... cross her threshold?" "Hmm." "It's not too late, you know." "She's a well preserved woman." "I envy you." "Yes, very well preserved." "And preserves have to be opened, some day." "You trot down and see what Mrs Rogers has to say." "How about hiding Harry first?" "Holy smoke!" "Forgetting a little detail like that could hang a man." "Yes..." "Oh!" "Oh, I beg your pardon!" "(MUTTERS TO HIMSELF)" "I hope I never have to be operated on by Dr Greenbaugh!" "Come on, let's get going." "Good afternoon." "You're beautiful." "Wonderful." "You are the most wonderful, beautiful thing I've ever seen." "I'd like to paint you." "Was there something else you wanted, Mr...?" "Marlow, isn't it?" "You certainly are a lovely woman." "I'd like to paint you nude." "Some other time, Mr Marlow." "I was about to make Arnie some lemonade." "Oh, yes, of course." "Perhaps I've come at an awkward moment." "If you want to undress me, you have." "It wasn't exactly that." "I came to talk to you about something." "But after I saw you, it slipped my mind." "Couldn't have been important." "You're right." "Why don't you sit down on the porch?" "I'll get you a lemonade, and maybe you'll think of it." "Not only beautiful but considerate too." "Arnie!" "Hello, Mr Marlow." "Hi." "What've you got, a rabbit?" "It's dead." "What have you got?" "Oh, I got me a little frog." "There he is." "It's hungry." "It needs a mother." "I'll trade you." "Your mother for mine?" "The rabbit for the frog." "It's yours, Arnie." "I think you got the best deal." "Dead rabbits don't eat." "I'll take it to the kitchen and get him some lemonade." "Four rabbit's feet and he got killed." "He shoulda carried a four-leafed clover too." "No, a horseshoe." "Say, how do rabbits get to be born?" "Same way elephants do." "Oh, sure." "How come you never came to visit me before?" "I didn't know you had such a pretty mother." "You think she's pretty, you should see my slingshot." "Perhaps I'll come back tomorrow." "When's that?" "The day after today." "That's yesterday." "Today's tomorrow." "It was." "When was tomorrow yesterday, Mr Marlow?" "Today." "Oh, sure." "Yesterday." "You'll never make sense of Arnie." "He's got his own time." "Lemonade, Arnie?" "I already swiped two glasses." "I'd have given you two." "It's more fun swiped." "Can I borrow your rabbit, Mr Marlow?" "Sure, Arnie." "What are you going to do with it?" "You never know when a dead rabbit might come in handy." "It already got me one frog." "Arnie, where are you going now?" "To make some more trades." "Arnie, home in time for supper." "I'll try." "What's your name?" "If you don't want to tell me, make one up." "Jennifer." "Jennifer Rogers." "Nice." "Who's the man up on the path?" "What man?" "You know, Harry." "The dead man." "Oh, him." "That's my husband." "Your husband's dead, then?" "Is your lemonade sweet enough?" "Seems to be." "I like it tart." "Harry is Arnie's father, then?" "No, Arnie's father's dead." "So's Harry." "Thank goodness." "He was too good to live." "From his looks, he didn't seem too good." "Well, he was, horribly good." "I like your mouth, too, specially when you say good." "Will you have some more lemonade?" "Maybe later, thanks." "Where did Arnie get the rabbit?" "He found it." "I think Captain Wiles shot it." "I'd like to hear more of your life story, if you don't mind." "We don't know what to do with Harry." "Thought you might have some suggestions." "You can stuff him for all I care." "Stuff him, put him in a glass case." "Only I'd suggest frosted glass." "What did he do to you, besides marry you?" "Look, I've wanted to explain about Harry a lot of times." "But nobody could understand." "Least of all Harry." "But you, you've got an artistic mind." "You can see the finer things." "When I'm lucky." "Go on, tell me everything." "Let it all out." "It was a long time ago and I was in love." "I was too much in love." "What was his name?" "Robert." "We'd agreed to overlook each other's families and get married." "And did you?" "Oh, yeah." "And then Robert got killed." "Oh?" "I was heartbroken, for six weeks." "Then I discovered little Arnie was on the way." "Must have been a shock." "Well, that's where Harry came in." "Harry the handsome hero." "Harry the saint." "Harry the good." "I didn't catch his last name." "Harry Worp." "Robert's brother, his older brother." "And he fell in love with you?" "If he had, I wouldn't have minded." "He wanted to marry me because he was Robert's brother and felt noble." "But you thought he loved you?" "And I decided to let him love me because of Arnie." "It was on my second wedding night that I learned the truth." "You didn't learn on your first?" "This was a terrible truth." "The truth about Harry." "Just what happened?" "How old are you, Mr Marlow?" "About 30." "This is what happened." "I was in the hotel room alone." "I put on my best nightie." "You understand?" "Perfectly." "Although I had no true feeling for Harry,... ..I had worked myself into a certain enthusiasm because I thought he loved me." "Must have been hard work." "There was a moon and I sat by the window." "I thought it would show off my new nightie to advantage." "Naturally." "I don't know why I'm telling you this, you a perfect stranger, too." "I'm not boring you?" "No, no, not at all." "I'll get some more lemonade." "Soon." "Soon." "Where was I?" "Sitting by the window, a moon, you'd worked up a certain enthusiasm." "I said all that?" "Er, when does Harry come in?" "He doesn't." "He never came in." "He called the following morning." "The following morning?" "In the hotel lobby, the night before, he had bought a magazine." "His horoscope was in it." "Bad?" "It said..." "He was a Taurus." "It said don't start any new project that day." "It could never be finished." "And what did you do?" "I left him on the spot and went home to Mother's." "The end." "What a poignant story!" "I knew you'd understand." "Nobody else does." "Not even Mother?" "She thought I should live with him." "But I wouldn't" "He pestered me to go back, but I always refused." "Suppose some night I wanted him to do something, like the dishes, for example." "His horoscope just wouldn't let him..." "You're absolutely right." "There's some things I just don't like to do by myself." "No-one with any true understanding would blame you for it." "Soon as Arnie was born, I moved away to where I thought Harry could never find me." "I changed my name and..." "But he was persistent?" "This morning there was a knock on the door." "Before I opened it, I knew he was on the other side." "What did he want?" "Me." "He wanted me because I was his wife." "Because, as he put it, he suddenly felt some basic urge." "Loneliness." "What'd you feel?" "I felt sick." "Did you see his moustache and his wavy hair?" "But then he was dead." "He looked exactly the same when he was alive, except vertical." "He entered." "What'd you say?" "Nothing." "I hit him over the head with a milk bottle and knocked him silly." "Silly?" "Bats, tappy." "He went staggerin' up towards the woods." "He said he'd find his wife and drag her home if it killed him." "Apparently it did." "Have some more lemonade." "Why, Captain Wiles, what a surprise!" "But you invited me, Miss Gravely." "At least, that's how I remember it." "Of course I did." "But somehow it's still a surprise." "You know how to make a man feel wanted." "Won't you come in, Captain?" "Thank you." "I've looked forward to it" "Takes a real cook to make a blueberry muffin, stop the berries sitting on the bottom." "High-bush blueberries, that's the secret." "I picked them where you shot that unfortunate man." "A real handsome man's cup!" "It's been in the family for years." "My father always used it, up until he died." "I trust he died peacefully, slipped away in the night?" "He was caught in a threshing machine." "I hope I haven't distressed you, Captain." "Oh, no." "Not at all." "I'm used to looking on the rough side of things." "I'm a man who's faced death many times." "Rather recently, too!" "Arnie!" "What are you carrying?" "A rabbit." "(CAPTAIN) A rabbit?" "!" "What do you call it?" "Dead." "It ain't mine." "Whose is it?" "Yours." "You shot it with your gun." "You must have killed it today!" "Should make a nice stew." "I've finally killed a rabbit!" "Where did you find it?" "In the blueberry muffins." "What?" "Out in the woods." "Oh..." "One muffin for one rabbit, fair enough." "That was a two-muffin rabbit." "I gotta go now." "Oh?" "(SIGHS)" "It's certainly a nice afternoon, Miss Gravely." "Isn't it?" "Yes, and you're... a nice woman." "And I think you're awfully nice, Captain Wiles." "Er..." "Let's get back to our little problem." "Harry." "What's going to become of him?" "Don't worry about Harry." "He'll be underground before nightfall." "All that digging and work." "Couldn't you just let him slide off your pier into the pond?" "And have him pop up like a cork?" "No, sir!" "Nobody ever popped up from under four feet of ground." "Besides, they're cutting ice there this winter." "Now wouldn't it be a nice thing if they were cutting blocks of ice and" " Never mind." "You're right." "Yes, underground is the best place for Harry." "He seems comfortable, Sam." "Very comfortable and snug." "Better find a place and get it dug, the sooner the better." "If what you tell me about Mrs Rogers and her husband is right, I agree!" "Well, let's find a place." "No use making hard work out of it." "We need a place where the earth is soft." "And a place where the whole town won't stumble over us as we work." "With a certain attractiveness." "Facing west, so Harry can watch the setting sun." "Cosy in winter." "And cool in the summer." "You know, I'm half envying Harry." "It wouldn't take much longer to dig it twice as wide." "Thanks for your kindness, but some other time!" "This looks like a good place." "You're a lucky fellow, Harry Worp!" "Off with your coat." "Who, me?" "!" "Certainly." "It's your body, isn't it?" "I'm not much of a hand at digging." "Should have thought of it before you went hunting." "(CAR SPLUTTERS)" "Calvin Wiggs!" "What do we do now?" "!" "Think up the best story he's ever heard." "Lay down your shovel, Sam." "What's the trouble?" "I'm dead beat." "Good." "I was dead beat ten minutes ago." "I wanted to keep on until you gave up." "Gives me the creeps." "Yeah?" "Well, let's get Harry and pop him in." "With hasty reverence." "Would you like to say a few words, Captain?" "That I would." "Harry Worp, don't ever show your face around here again!" "(CAR SPLUTTERS)" "Let's finish this job and get out of here." "Cap, I think Calvin Wiggs is looking for something." "Do you suppose he knows Harry came up here?" "That's as horrible a thought as you've ever had!" "And he wonders what happened to Harry or where he is?" "Just keep on scraping, and fast." "You know, if you must kill things from now on, I wish you'd stick to rabbits." "The body's smaller." "I didn't tell you, I killed a rabbit today!" "Don't shout!" "I know." "I was at Jennifer Rogers' when Arnie showed me it." "Jennifer, eh?" "Didn't waste much time, did you?" "I don't blame you." "A very nice widow she'll make, very nice." "Let's discuss her when we've finished with Harry." "Don't get huffy." "I don't want to discuss your affairs, I've got ones of my own." "You mean my protegee?" "Come again?" "Miss Gravely, the lady I renovated down at Mrs Wiggs' this afternoon." "A most remarkable reversion to femininity." "I don't quite get you, Sammy boy." "She came in in high excitement." "Wanted a new cup and saucer, lots of things." "I gave her new make-up and hairdo." "Don't tell me you didn't notice." "Oh, she's a very nice lady, Sam." "Very nice." "We're all nice." "I don't see how anyone could help but like us." "That's just how I feel today." "I don't know whether I've grown rose-coloured glasses or - Or if you're in love?" "Ahhh!" "There's nothing like finding yourself in love." "No, it adds zest to your work, zest, zest!" "I think I've had enough zest for a while." "Let's sit down and rest, huh?" "Why not?" "We've earned it." "Tell me, Sam, what did Jennifer think of my shooting?" "You mean Mrs Rogers?" "I think I'm entitled to be on a first-name basis." "I brought her a happy release with one bullet." "One bullet?" "What about that No Shooting sign I found?" "One bullet for the No Shooting sign, one for the beer can and one for Harry." "How about the rabbit?" "And one for the ra " "What's the matter?" "Hey, what's wrong?" "!" "What's bitten you?" "!" "I only fired three bullets!" "Three!" "One for the sign, one for the beer can" " And one for the little man lying in the grave." "No, Sammy, that's it!" "One for the rabbit!" "If I shot the rabbit, I didn't shoot Harry." "What have you tried to make me do?" "!" "Trying to make a murderer of me!" "Don't sit there!" "Help me." "You helped bury him." "Even if you didn't kill him, why go digging him up?" "He's so beautifully planted." "I promised Jennifer we'd bury him." "To keep my word, he should stay down" "Besides, whether you killed him or not, you've incriminated yourself." "You'll have more of a job explaining away a body you didn't kill and buried... ..than a body you killed accidentally and buried, right, Captain?" "You're not meant to bury bodies whenever you find them." "It makes people suspicious." "You're supposed to tell the police, or advertise." "You don't understand!" "You don't comprehend one little bit." "You wouldn't want me to go through life not knowing if I killed him!" "Very inconsistent." "First you say you have no conscience." "But this sounds remarkably like one." "Sammy, come on, help me!" "I don't care if I killed him or not, for all that matters." "But I'll get the shakes whenever I see a policeman and it's no good saying I won't!" "Alright." "If I had my choice, I'd rather be thought a murderer than proved one." "Thank you." "Sammy." "With two of us, we'll have Harry up out of here in nothing flat." "You can't see much from here." "I'd better get down there and look at him." "Let me do the honour." "Well, alright, Sammy." "You've got good eyes." "Hey, that isn't a bullet-wound." "Isn't a bullet-wound?" "!" "Well, what do you know?" "!" "That's what they call a blow with a blunt instrument." "Huh?" "What are you thinking, Sammy?" "I think, Captain Wiles, we're tangled up in a murder." "Mu..." "If it's murder, who done it?" "Who did it?" "That's what I say, who done it?" "Apart from Jennifer, who else would want to kill him?" "Apart from Jennifer?" "Yeah." "Do you think she would...?" "It's ridiculous!" "You said she was surprised to see the body when she came up here." "You said she hit him on the head." "Coming from Madagascar, we had a fireman who hit his head on a brick wall, died two days later." "Where could he find a brick wall on a ship?" "That's what we always wondered." "It couldn't have been Jennifer, no." "Besides, what does it matter who did it?" "if he's buried and out of the way." "Nothing doing." "I'm not burying someone else's bad habits." "Suppose it was Miss Gravely?" "(LAUGHS)" "It's not as funny as all that." "You said she wasn't startled to see you dragging Harry." "You artists have no idea of etiquette." "Miss Gravely is a lady of gentle habits and upbringing, who hides her feelings." "If I hadn't been holding Harry's ankle, she wouldn't have mentioned him." "Really?" "When she said, "What seems to be the trouble, Captain?" it was nothing more than a pleasantry." "Like, "Nice day, isn't it?" Yes." "Or something like that." "Going to help me bury him again?" "I don't know." "Of course, it might have been Dr Greenbaugh, or the tramp." "Or Jennifer?" "I told you, it couldn't..." "Well, no point in arguing about it." "Let's get rid of him." "Alright, Sammy." "You helped me in my hour of need." "I guess it's up to me to help you." "We'll file Harry away once and for all." "And no more nonsense about it." "Come aboard, Miss Gravely." "Come aboard." "It's just an old salt's snug anchorage." "Small, not palatial like yours." "But homely, very homely..." "Won't you sit down, Miss Gravely?" "Thank you." "It's funny, you know." "Funny how we got to be so friendly in one afternoon." "I knew you weren't as prim and starchy as they made out." "Not by a long shot." "Really?" "No." "I'm a man who knows human qualities in a woman." "When I saw you where Harry " "Captain Wiles!" "Yes?" "Before you make your kind thoughts known to me,... ..I should like to offer some explanation of my sudden invitation this afternoon." "And my sitting with you here now." "No, ma'am." "You don't have to explain anything." "You came to my aid at a moment of crisis, for which I am truly grateful" "Thank you, but it's just that I owe you some reason " "No, no, no, I won't hear a word of it." "You saw the predicament I was in, with a body on my hands." "You shut your to eyes to it in a most sporting fashion." "Captain Wiles!" "Yes, ma'am?" "I'm trying to tell you the reason I asked you to coffee and muffins was because I felt..." "Sympathy." "Gratitude." "But I'm the one who should be grateful!" "No, I was grateful." "I am grateful." "I..." "I'm grateful to you for burying my body." "Your body?" "The man you thought you killed was the man I hit over the head with the heel of my hiking shoe." "You?" "And with the metal cleat on the end of it." "But why?" "He annoyed me." "I was walking towards home when he suddenly came at me with a wild look and insisted... ..we were married." "You'd known each other before." "Believe it or not, Captain, I had never seen him before in my life." "And if I ever had, I never would have married him!" "He must have mistaken you for someone else." "Oh, no, he very definitely pulled me into the bushes." "Yes?" "I came out again." "Go on." "He pulled me back." "Twice." "He swore at me, horrible masculine sounds." "I didn't understand them, of course." "Of course you didn't." "We fought." "Then what?" "I won." "My shoe had come off in the struggle, and I hit him." "I hit him as hard as ever I could." "You killed him." "I must have done it." "I was annoyed, Captain." "Very annoyed." "Naturally." "I don't think I've ever been so annoyed." "Consequently, I didn't realise my own capabilities." "Phew!" "Seems to me Mrs Rogers knocked him silly, and you finished him off." "Why should Mrs Rogers knock him silly?" "She was really his wife." "Poor woman!" "I thought she had better taste." "You know, when I ran away I decided I would never tell a soul what happened." "Then I met you and I thought... ..how convenient it was that you should think that you had shot him." "You must forgive me for thinking that." "Only natural." "That's why I felt, I still feel, under an obligation to you." "Not at all." "Let's forget it." "No, no, we mustn't do that." "It would hardly be fair to you." "I mean, for you to go through life knowing you had buried a man you didn't kill." "You'd have my crime on your conscience!" "It's a pleasure..." "Hic!" ".." "I'm sure." "But no." "Now I realise that Harry man was out of his mind and my action was justifiable,... ..there's no reason we shouldn't let the authorities know." "The authorities?" "!" "Everything will be cleared up nicely." "I'm sure Calvin and the police won't make a fuss when we explain." "It needn't get into the papers." "Don't you believe it!" "They love it, the papers, this kind of thing." "Murder and passion." "You let Harry be." "Forget it ever happened, as Sammy and I and Jennifer Rogers will." "Oh..." "Oh, but it isn't your body." "After all, I killed him, so it's only fair I should have a say-so." "Yes, but" " Don't you agree?" "In a way..." "I thought you would." "I tell you what, Captain." "You go and get a spade now." "But ma'am..." "After we've dug him up, we'll go to my place for hot chocolate." "Arnie's so tired he'll sleep all day and half the night." "You've got a pretty house, Jennifer." "The best I could do on Robert's insurance." "Sugar?" "No, black, thanks." "It's funny, but I feel awful comfortable with you, Sam." "I feel the same way too." "It's a good feeling." "Feeling comfortable with someone who feels that way too." "There is one thing I feel uncomfortable about." "Tell me what it is and I'll take care of it for you." "It's Harry." "What about Harry?" "Harry?" "Don't you think about Harry." "Harry's part of the earth." "He's with eternity, the ages." "Take my word for it, Harry's ancient history." "(KNOCKING)" "Come in, whoever it is." "What happened?" "!" "Sam, I've got something to tell you." "No, Captain, I have something to tell them." "Now who's going to tell what?" "I killed Harry Worp with the leather heel of my hiking shoe." "So it was you?" "!" "We're on our way to get Calvin to call the state police." "I tell her there's no need." "He's right, and it'd be indecent." "Harry's dead and buried." "Sam, I've got something to tell you!" "You haven't dug him up again?" "!" "Well, I..." "I insisted, Mr Marlow." "But don't you understand...?" "You have nothing to fear." "It's my concern entirely." "As soon as Captain Wiles told me the full circumstances, I knew there was nothing for me to hide." "You know all about Harry?" "I'm afraid I do, Mrs Rogers." "And nobody could possibly gossip about a lady and a maniac." "You'd be surprised." "You don't understand what murder involves, Miss Gravely." "Hours of questioning, photographs." "Your private life spread indecently in the newspapers." "What makes you think my private life is indecent?" "!" "I didn't mean that." "I meant the way they pry is indecent." "They'll hound you to death." "Newspapermen, detectives..." "I've made up my mind." "She certainly has." "Captain Wiles persuaded me to call and tell Mrs Rogers what I proposed to do." "After all, she is most closely connected with the business." "What do you think, Mrs Rogers?" "I can't see why you're all making such a fuss about Harry." "If he was buried, I don't see why you had to dig him up." "But as you have, you'd better do what you think best." "I don't care what you do with Harry as long as you don't bring him back to life." "I have a free hand, then?" "Free as a bird." "As far as I'm concerned, it's ancient history." "Wait a minute, wait a minute, Jennifer." "We forgot something." "If this comes out, all the details of your marriage will be public property." "Oh." "I must confess, I hadn't thought of that either." "Where's Harry this time?" "Over by the big oak tree." "I'll get my shovel." "I'm afraid I'm causing you rather a lot of hard work." "I'm sorry." "Not at all." "Well, let's all go up there." "I've never been to a home-made funeral before." "I have!" "This is my third." "All in one day." "Well, let's get it over with." "Yes..." "I think we ought to cement it over!" "Next spring, I'll set out some blueberry bushes." "Couldn't you make it something else?" "Lilac, maybe?" "Nature'll take care of it." "How about a little service?" "I can't think of anything to say." "Besides, my arms ache." "It's too late to say prayers." "Wherever he was going, he's there now." "Bye, Harry, I forgive you." "(PERSISTENT HORN-BEEPING)" "Trumpets welcoming Harry!" "You didn't know Harry." "I'd like to paint you like that, Jennifer." "You look beautiful in the moonlight." "(HORN) Sounds as if it's coming from near the village." "I know what it is." "It's the call of the phantom stage coach... ..that used to pass by here each night 200 years ago!" "Phantom coach!" "The old turnpike used to run across those hills there." "Oh, to be a highwayman on a night like this." "Listen." "Somebody's running." "Horses?" "If it's a horse it's learned how to shout." "What's she saying?" "We'll know." "She's coming this way." "(WOMAN YELLS)" "It's Wiggy!" "Old Wiggy!" "Mr Marlow!" "Mr Marlow!" "Wiggy, what on earth do you want?" "(INDISTINCT) Wait a minute." "Catch your breath." "He's a millionaire!" "Who?" "He wants to buy your pictures, Mr Marlow!" "Which?" "All of 'em, and more besides!" "He says you're a genius." "I am, but it's hard to believe he wants to buy all my pictures." "I'd be curious at least to talk to him." "Don't turn down a good chance!" "Alright, I'll talk to him." "(CAPTAIN) We've been digging sassafras root." "Mr Wiggs swore sassafras tea cured his arthritis just before he died." "What's the millionaire want to pay?" "I asked seven dollars for the one that's blobs of colour in a thunderstorm." "He said no, said they were priceless." "(CAP) Sounds like something I painted at kindergarten." "It's symbolic of the beginning of the world." "So was mine." "Yes, and my friend here, art critic for the Modern Museum, he says " "Don't think I'm rude, but I don't care about art critics." "Is that so?" "I know my paintings are good." "He doesn't want them, you do." "All that matters is what you think." "I think they're works of genius." "I want to buy them all." "Too bad." "Why?" "I've just decided I can't sell them." "And you couldn't afford them." "Money..." "Sammy, don't be a fool!" "Make him pay through the nose." "Go ahead, Mr Marlow." "Be reasonable." "Be unreasonable, if you want." "What do you say?" "It's your genius, Sam." "It's up to you." "Alright, then." "What do you like most in the whole world?" "I don't know." "Strawberries, I guess." "Strawberries." "Two boxes of fresh strawberries, first of each month, in season and out,... ..from now on." "Well, it's simple." "What else?" "What would Arnie like?" "A chemical set." "What kind?" "Whatever smells the worst." "Got that?" "Right." "One smelly chemical set." "Wiggy?" "What would you like?" "A cash register, chromium plated, one that rings a bell." "Got room?" "Yes." "Cash register." "Chromium plated, one that rings a bell." "Check." "Miss Gravely, a beauty parlour, fully equipped?" "What for?" "!" "A hope chest, filled with the things I should have put in it and didn't." "A hope chest." "Full of hope." "Captain?" "Good shotgun, plenty of ammunition, some corduroy britches,... ..a plain shirt, and a hunting cap." "A brown one." "Davy Crockett, the works." "That's it, I guess." "The paintings are yours." "Yes, but what about you?" "Yes, Sam, you've gotta ask for something." "Let's see..." "That's it!" "What's it?" "Pardon me. (WHISPERS)" "What do you think?" "Yes, I think that can be easily arranged." "Well, that's it, then." "I'll come back in the morning for all these paintings." "Mr Marlow, this has been a night I shall remember the rest of my life." "Come back again." "I'll have some more paintings next month." "And I'll be a steady customer." "Even if you raise your prices!" "Well, goodnight, everyone." "(ALL SAY GOODNIGHT)" "Alright, young man." "Congratulations, Sammy!" "Good boy!" "Did I do the right thing?" "You did just the right thing, Sam." "Good." "Because it's important to me that you think so." "Why?" "Because I love you." "I want to marry you." "Oooh!" "You wanna marry me?" "Uh-huh." "Why not?" "Because I just got my freedom today." "Easy come, easy go." "Besides, if you married me, you'd keep your freedom." "You must be practically unique, then." "I respect freedom." "More than that, I love freedom." "We might be the only free married couple in the world." "This is very sudden, Sam." "You'll have to give me a little time to think about it." "Only fair." "I'll give you till we get back to your house." "(DOOR OPENS)" "What's goin' on here this time of night?" "The most wonderful thing happened." "Mr Marlow sold all his paintings to a millionaire!" "Got more than I ever figured!" "Money?" "Not exactly money." "Always knew they weren't worth the space." "I found these on a tramp hanging round here." "Said he found them on a dead man." "Took me to where he said he found him and I didn't see any body!" "Montpellier 2000." "That's the state police number." "Uh-huh." "I think we'd better get going." "Thank you for the cash register." "It was a pleasure." "Goodnight." "Goodnight. (ALL SAY GOODNIGHT)" "Deputy Sheriff Calvin Wiggs." "I'll wait." "Ma?" "Hmm?" "This picture on the floor." "It's a new one." "He did it today." "But it ain't for sale." "Why not?" "You'll have to ask him that." "He left it on his way over to Jennifer Rogers'." "Guess he didn't have time to take it home." "You suddenly got interested in art?" "No." "It's just that it matches the description that..." "Hello, Sergeant." "Calvin Wiggs." "Got something that might interest you a little." "I picked up this tramp with a pair of stolen shoes... ..and a wild story about a corpse!" "What do you think, him walking in with Harry Worp's shoes in his hand?" "Then that call to the police?" "I don't know." "I may be wrong, but I don't think he's tied us into it yet." "The way he looked at me!" "If he'd known anything, he'd have kept us there." "But modern police methods are all psychological now, Sammy." "Psychological." "They just wear you down and wear you down until... ..you're almost grateful to get into the gas chamber!" "The police'll probably tell him if the shoes fit to keep them!" "Ah, well." "I've decided, Sam." "Decided what?" "I will marry you." "You haven't forgotten about asking me?" "!" "I'm very fond of you and I think you'd make a good father for Arnie." "And... ..for some other reasons best left unsaid." "Marriage is a comfortable way to spend the winter." "But right now we should be working on some good story for the state police!" "Can you believe I'd almost forgotten that proposal?" "I have witnesses, Sam." "Oh, I remember now." "Alright." "You've got yourself a husband." "I think I'll kiss you now to prove it." "Lightly, Sam." "I have a very short fuse." "What a pretty sight." "Sam?" "What did you ask the millionaire for?" "(WHISPERS)" "That's very practical." "Congratulations, my dear!" "You're a lucky man, Sammy." "I think you'll both be very happy." "Thank you." "If I grumbled too much at my share of the work in burying Harry, I'm sorry." "I can see now it was well worth it." "And if I can do anything else - Hold it, hold it!" "Hold it." "What's wrong, Sam?" "Harry." "We're not quite finished with him yet." "If anybody's through it's Harry." "He's been buried three times." "Before we can marry you have to prove you're free." "That means proving Harry's" " Dead." "What a horrible complication." "Oh!" "I don't know that it is." "What are you looking at me for?" "!" "Sammy, Sammy!" "I'll do anything to help you, but please, please don't ask me to dig up Harry again!" "Captain!" "No, we can't!" "If you're thinking of bad publicity" " No, I'm not." "I think Sam would be worth just about anything." "I'm thinking of you, Miss Gravely." "Murder is murder, no matter how exonerating the circumstances." "And it just wouldn't look nice at all for you." "That's right!" "Better let him stay where he is." "You only have to wait seven years to presume death, anyway." "Seven years?" "!" "I'll be an old man!" "Silly." "You waited far longer than seven years already." "But now I know what I'm waiting for." "I insist that you dig the wretched man up." "I don't care a hoot what they say." "They'd only have to know me to realise the man must have been mad." "I disagree!" "Really, Captain Wiles?" "I'll dig him up." "But we'd better get it done before Calvin Wiggs gets the state police snooping around." "I've been thinking." "I've been thinking maybe we could forget the way it really happened." "I could tell them Harry visited me and went off in a rage and that's all we know." "No." "Somebody else might get the blame." "Somebody else might not have such a good reason as I did." "What do you mean, somebody else?" "I can think of at least two people around here with a good reason for having killed Harry." "First you because you married him." "And now Sam." "Me?" "Why would I want to kill him?" "I'd never met him before." "You could still have a reason." "She means me." "Yes." "I didn't fall in love with Jennifer until after Harry was dead." "Try telling that to the police." "She's right, Sammy boy." "On second thought, we'd better stick to the truth." "What there is of it." "We'll have to think up a reason why the police weren't informed before now." "There's his condition." "That'll take some explaining." "We'll clean him up a bit." "It's horrible, but there's nothing else we can do." "We can't risk complicating Miss Gravely's confession." "As for the delay, I can explain I was so upset that I went straight home and rested." "Only natural." "They'll think you rested rather a long time." "I'd rather not spend the whole night debating." "Let's get Harry someplace and clean him up." "(MAN'S VOICE APPROACHES)" "Let's get out of here!" "(MAN CONTINUES TO TALK TO HIMSELF)" "(HE RECITES SHAKESPEARE)" "If this be error, and upon me proved, I never writ, nor no man ever loved." "I think he met with a bit of an accident, Dr Greenbaugh." "He certainly did!" "Which of you found him?" "Well..." "He was my husband, Doctor." "Mrs Rogers, I didn't know you had a husband." "I'm awfully sorry." "It's alright, Doctor." "It's just life, I guess." "What happened to him?" "Well, he" " That's what we'd like to know, Doctor." "Could you tell us what caused his death?" "It was so sudden." "In this light, my opinion'd be little more than a guess." "We could take him where you could see." "Yes, but I need my bag." "Where shall we meet?" "I'll take Harry home to my house." "Going home for the last time." "It better be the last time!" "Come on, Sam." "I've got about one more trip left in me." "I'll get your coat." "I'll get the suspenders on." "I can't wait for this to be ready." "I'll have to iron it dry." "Isn't it odd?" "After refusing for so long, here I am finally doing Harry's laundry!" "(MOANS)" "Ahhhh!" "It's nothing to get excited about, Captain." "It's only a closet door." "Oh..." "I thought it was Harry." "Relax, Captain." "Nothing to worry about." "What about the cut I made on his head with my hiking shoe?" "I'll put some adhesive tape on it." "They'll think it was done before he died." "After this is finished, it's just about everything." "(CAR APPROACHES)" "If that's who I think..." "Calvin Wiggs' car!" "(DOORBELL)" "(DOORBELL)" "Just one minute!" "(DOORBELL)" "Well, Calvin Wiggs!" "What a surprise." "Sam here?" "Yes, yes, he's here." "Can I see him a minute?" "Sam?" "Yeah?" "Calvin Wiggs is here to see you." "Tell him I'll be right out." "He says he'll be right out." "Why don't I just go on in?" "Evening, Calvin." "Evening, Captain Wiles." "Miss Gravely." "We've got 'em on the run in four spades." "They should have been in diamonds!" "Play much bridge?" "Never play it." "That's what I thought." "Something you wanted, Calvin?" "Where were you today, Sam?" "Working, as usual." "Somewheres down by Mansfield Meadows?" "Possibly." "I did quite a bit of sketching." "Why?" "Is that where... ..where you painted this?" "I left that with your mother." "What right do you have to take it?" "It might be damaged!" "It could be priceless, and Sam would lose a sale!" "I'll send blueberries the first of every month." "I wanna know - where'd you paint it and who is it?" "First of all, it's not a painting, it's a drawing." "It's a pastel." "And as for the model..." "It just came to me out of the blue." "You don't say." "Why are you acting like a deputy sheriff?" "That tramp I picked up, the one with the shoes?" "Said he got 'em off a dead man?" "He described him very carefully, and it fits this picture to a T." "A tramp, who maybe can't keep a job and drinks too much?" "I wouldn't think his word was reliable." "Got him locked up in the schoolhouse." "I took this painting to show" " Drawing." "I took the drawing to show him." "Almost fainted." "Said it was the same face." "Where'd you paint it, Sam?" "From my vast subconscious." "Sam, I hate to say this." "But I don't believe you." "With all this talk, I've lost interest." "If you'll forgive me, I'll run along home." "I'll see you tomorrow." "What do you mean, you don't believe me?" "I mean, Sam..." "I ain't educated in fancy art." "But I do know the face of a dead man when I see one." "And this is it." "Calvin, perhaps I can educate you to fancy art." "See this?" "Portrait of a sleeping face." "A man relaxed, far removed from earthly cares." "It was conceived out of memory and half-forgotten impulse." "It emerged from the shadows of abstract emotions until it was born full-grown... ..from the mechanical realities of my fingertips." "Now Sam" " I don't have to have a model to draw from." "Instead of a sleeping face, I could have chosen a different set of artistic stimuli." "My subconscious is peopled with enough faces to cover the earth." "The construction of the human anatomy alone is so infinitely variable... ..as to lie beyond the wildest powers of calculation." "A raised eyelid, perhaps..." "A line of fullness to the cheek." "A lip that bends with expression." "There." "Sammy..." "Do you know what you just did?" "Certainly." "I showed you how you misinterpreted my art." "You destroyed legal evidence." "Calvin, it appears to me you still don't understand." "I understand you've made kind of a fool outta me." "But I still got enough evidence to know something funny's going on." "I ain't going to sleep till I find out what it is." "Goodnight, Calvin." "Hey!" "What's he doing in our bath tub?" "!" "That's where frogs belong." "Oh." "Arnie, back to bed!" "State troopers'll be up in the morning." "I'll want them to have a talk with you." "So be around." "Back to bed!" "You can find me at my studio." "Just make sure. (KNOCKING)" "Where is he?" "He's in the bathroom, playing with his frog." "Oh...?" "Er, this way, please, Doctor." "It's Arnie, he's not very well." "(HORN HOOTS OUTSIDE)" "Someone's fooling around with my car!" "(HORN BEEPS)" "What are you playing with the horn for?" "!" "It ain't your car!" "Well, things are funny, you know." "Me and Miss Gravely are looking for a car." "Yes, had a look at this one." "It's a beauty." "I wanna keep it that way!" "Now, that's not the way to talk to a prospective customer." "You're no prospective customer." "You can't afford this car." "He's gone." "Well, I put the little..." "I put Arnie back to bed." "What did the doctor say?" "He said for me to get out." "I didn't like the look in his eye, either." "Something was bothering him." "Well, Captain, did you get over being frightened?" "!" "Frightened?" "Oh!" "That's not why I left!" "No!" "I'm not easily frightened, you know." "No, after all those years sailing the four corners of the globe, strange ports, rough men and..." "Miss Gravely, what would you say if I told you I was only the captain of a tugboat?" "On the East River." "I never got more than a mile or so off shore." "Well, I would say that... ..that you were the handsomest tugboat captain that ever sailed up the East River." "Or maybe not!" "No!" "Here, do you want to see something?" "Here." "Here!" "Captain!" "Where'd you get those?" "!" "Calvin Wiggs' car!" "I figured you were handling half the evidence, Sammy." "So it was up to me to take care of the rest." "You're the sweetest little tugboat captain I ever kissed!" "What's he doing in the bath tub?" "!" "Well,..." "what'd you find out, Doctor?" "Oh, that?" "It was his heart." "He had a seizure." "His heart?" "!" "Yes." "A seizure!" "Well, I'll take a trip to the Philippines!" "Death from natural causes." "Certainly." "Will somebody tell me what he's doing in the bath, half undressed?" "!" "Frankly, we didn't want Calvin Wiggs to see him." "Besides, he was awful dirty after we dug him up." "Dug him up?" "!" "I'd better explain, Doctor." "You see, Harry's been buried and dug up all day long." "What?" "!" "Finally he caused so many problems we decided to clean him up and put him where we found him." "I don't understand." "What problems?" "Well, he upset Captain Wiles because he thought he had shot him." "The hole in the head." "As it turned out, it wasn't." "It was the blow from Miss Gravely's shoe after he attacked her." "Capt Wiles attacked Miss Gravely?" "!" "No, Doctor, Harry." "He dragged her into the bushes thinking it was me." "He was dazed after I hit him on the head with a milk bottle." "(SIGHS)" "The Captain and Sam buried him first." "The Captain was so scared!" "Then he accounted for all his bullets." "So up Harry came." "Then Miss Gravely thought her shoe was responsible." "Her shoe?" "!" "So the Captain, rather gallantly, pushed him back in again." "Then he was out and back, I can't remember why." "He's out again now because Sam and I want to get married." "Yes..." "But why did you...?" "Hit him on the head?" "It wouldn't interest you." "It's purely personal and non-medical." "Besides, it's awfully late, so if you'll keep quiet about this... ..we'll put Harry back in the morning and no-one'll be any the wiser." "And then we'll be rid of all these problems." "Put him back, put him back, put him back..." "This is my first nightmare in 25 years!" "Kinda strange, isn't he?" "(GIGGLES) Well, er..." "we'd better get Harry dressed." "Yes, yes." "Wouldn't it be nice if Arnie found him all over again?" "He'd run and tell me and I'd phone Calvin Wiggs." "And Arnie could explain quite clearly..." "That he found Harry tomorrow." "You mean today?" "But to Arnie, tomorrow is yesterday." "Let's go get Harry." "Come on." "Here he comes." "(WHISPERS) Go on, Arnie!" "Run home and tell me!" "Don't touch him!" "Run and tell your mother!" "Beat it, you little creep!" "I mean, hurry home, son!" "Captain, you never told me your first name!" "Albert." "What's yours?" "Ivy." "Albert, let's go." "Just a minute, ma'am." "I want to ask Sam something." "Sam?" "What did you ask the millionaire to bring you?" "(WHISPERS)" "Albert, what was it?" "(WHISPERS) A double bed!" "(OTHERS GIGGLE)" "IMS Subtitles"