"Previously..." "Ever since I took my trust, I've become this person." " I buy my way out of everything." " You'll get used to it." " Look at Dad." " I don't want to be like Dad." "Vesuvius is a homecoming legend." "It's the party against which all other parties are judged." " They killed her, Cap." "Vesuvius." " No." "I'm with Max." "Why can't you find someone else perfect for you?" "No other girl in the world compares to you." " It's old habits, Cap." " Old habits?" "Like having a great time?" " What does that tell you?" " That we can't be friends." "I'll see you around." "I love blue." "I love alumni." "Hi alumna?" "Alumnus?" "Whatever." "Most of all, I love my first homecoming with my boyfriend." "Yay, homecoming." "But most of all I love having a best friend who won't hate me for forgetting that her boyfriend is far away doing sciencey stuff." "I don't need you to be sad for me, Ash." "I'm happy for you, but..." "All this focus on homecoming definitely makes me miss Max." "Well, you two will have your own homecoming in less than a week." "Trident fishermen stay up late." "Ties the flies and masters the bait." "Stay up late." "I do not love blue that much." " Nice suit." "Who died?" " A dear friend." " Really?" " No." "Now." "Get out of here, Evan Rachel Wooden." "Just keeping up appearances." " What the hell?" " It's okay, Ash." "No, not Cappie, Frannie." "OK, if everybody could please take their seats." "We'll get started." "I'll hand things over to our float contest chair," "Gamma Psi President Natalie Martin, and her co-chair," "Frannie Morgan, president of the Iota Kappas, the newest member to Panhellenic." "I've got it, Nat." "First, let me say how awesome it is to be back with you guys." "Officially." "I was supposed to say this part." "And I'm thrilled to announce our theme for this year's all-Greek float building contest" ""Love through the ages."" "Love through the cages?" "Which reminds me, Evan, the petting zoo called." "You're still banned." "Sorry." "This year's winning team will split a $2000 prize which was donated by one of our most illustrious alumni:" "Jonathan Chambers." "Maybe we should have taken back those Icky defectors after all." " I still feel a little sorry for her." " I've..." "We've randomly paired the houses by drawing names out of a hat." "Your partners' names are in your envelopes." "The Ikapps are with the Omega Chis." "Okay, I officially don't feel sorry for her anymore." "Feel sorry for us, instead." "Kappa Tau?" "Okay." "Good luck everyone." "So everyone should pair up with your partners homecoming float chairs if you brought them." "And start building your floats." "He lived and died for parties." "Like Clarence Thomas once said:" ""Do not go gentle into that good night." "Rage, rage against the dying of the light."" "All things must come to an end, Pickle." "The important now is to find a way to move on with our lives." "And the only way to do that is to let go of the past." "Goodbye Vesuvius." "Never have the words "ashes to ashes" been more appropriate." "Why don't we just rebuild Vesuvius?" "All we need is some money, a Remington Herzog Atmospheric Destabilizer, Scotch tape..." "We've gone through this." "It takes serious bank to rebuild the 8th wonder of the world and we don't have it." "But we would if we won the float contest." "KTs do not do floats." "I say we put it up to a vote." "Fine." "All in favor of spending countless hours building a ridiculous homecoming float with the ZBZs..." "So we can resurrect Vesuvius." " ... say "Aye."" " Aye." "Sorry Cap, it's for Vesuvius." "Great." "Then I guess we're building a float." "So now, before our new float chair, Rusty leads us to a likely defeat," "Pickle has organized a wake with plenty of beer, extra crispy chicken and a screening of Joe vs. The Volcano." " That's my favorite movie." " I know, Pickle." "We all know." "Come on." " I can't..." " Come on." "Yeah, I'll just go ahead." "I'll get started then." "Can I help, Spitter?" "Yeah, sure." "=Greek 221=- "Tailgate Expectations"" "Timing:" "Kappa Team" "I don't know what to do with..." "I know that the kts aren't bad guys." "It's just hard to do a project with people who can't focus." "And still need afternoon naps." "Ash, I think maybe I should sit this one out." "What're you talking about?" "No." "Your float design looks great." "Well, except, are you sure there was a giant broccoli in the Garden of Eden?" "It's a tree, not a broccoli." "I shouldn't be in charge of getting it built." "Maybe Betsy could do it." "She's social chair." "The only float she's ever built involved ice cream and vodka." "Look, I know things between you and Cappie are a little weird." "They aren't weird." "They just... aren't." "We're not really talking to each other." "It's just too awkward to be around him." "We can't let Frannie and the Ickies win their first contest out of the Panhellenic box." "It would set a very bad precedent." "Ash. "Precedent."" " You sound so presidential." " I know, right?" "I wanna be a great president and not lose." "So, you need to do this not just for me and for ZBZ, but for yourself." "If you really want Cappie to move on, you're going to have to be OK with this." "A new kind of Cappie and Casey." "Or maybe we could just go 90210 Classic and burn down Frannie's float Emily Valentine style." " Seriously?" " No." "Let's build a float." "I'll take care of running the truck and" "I figured you'd love to be in charge of the float." " Don't gay guys love floats?" " That's show tunes, jackass, you're mixing your stereotypes." "But even if I did love floats," "I do not love Frannie." "Mom." " Sweetheart." " It's so good to see you." " Hi, son." " Hi, Dad." " You remember Calvin." " Of course." "I hope our little president's handling the house well." "So much so, he just delegated the float to me." "Awesome." "So we could win and keep the prize money in the family." "Spoken like a true Chambers." "OK, well, since I don't speak Chambers, I'll let you get on with it." "Frannie and the homecoming float awaits." "Doesn't get much better than that." "I don't suppose there's any chance you and Frannie..." "Mim, leave your son alone." " You two are in a good mood." " We're just glad to see you, son." "And we are so proud of you." "Your grades are good." "You're president of Omega Chi." "And I'm assuming that that truly impressive vehicle parked in the driveway is yours." "Do they let guys my age drive things like that?" "I know things were a bumpy when we first handed over the trust." "We're just happy to see you doing so well." "And I'm starving." "Ready for lunch?" "Yeah, yeah." "Let's go." "You sure you're not dying or something, Dad?" "Trust me, Evan, when I'm dying, I will not be in a good mood." "We could build a huge castle over a running stream." "It could be like Romeo and Juliet." "That is the best example of "Love Through the Ages."" "What about Jennifer Love Hewitt?" "We could start at Party of Five, move on toTime of Your Life, which wasn't very good." "Can't Hardly Wait, Ghost Whisperer..." " Ghosts are pretty cool." " You can't see ghosts." "Yeah, but she can." "We don't even have to make them." "We could just be like:" ""There's a ghost." And people will be like: "Where?"" "We'll be like, "J.L.H. can see them." And they'll be like." "Or..." "Star Wars?" "Princess Leia and Han Solo." "Hey guys." "Casey, hey." "We were just discussing our float theme." "I have it right here." "We were thinking something more along the lines of" "Death Stars and moats." "And Jennifer Love Hewitt." "Neither of you have ever built a float before?" "No, but I did make a volcano rain beer." " Is that a giant broccoli?" " That is a tree." "Casey's trees always look like broccoli." "This is the Garden of Eden." "Beautiful, romantic and achievable with paper-mache and chicken wire." "Hey, Cap." "Come here and check this out." "We were discussing our theme." "Do you want in?" "I'm thinking Star Wars." "Casey wants the Garden of Eden." "Bert  Ernie?" "No?" "That's all I got." "Guess I'll just head down to Dobler's." "OK for the Garden of Eden, but only if we can put in a running stream and thunder clouds." "And Eve as a ghost." "Every flower has to be perfect if we're gonna beat Frannie." "I don't think anyone's going to notice incorrectly wrinkled tissue paper." "Tailgate supplies complete." "My work here's done." "And your fun begins." "So how are you showing your school spirit this weekend?" "You know, I guess I'm more of an internal spirit kind of guy." "You haven't found the right thing." "You just have to keep an open mind and jump in." "Maybe you could be in the card section, or..." " Pick fights with the other team." " Or..." "Maybe one of those crazy blue guys who runs around campus?" "No." "They're just embarrassing." "And they almost ruined my new white jacket last night." "Between work and school I don't have much time for that stuff anyway." "How about I catch up with you after the game?" "We'll do something then, OK?" "Cute, apathetic, and a good shopper." "My kind of guy." " If he wasn't already yours." " Which he is." "And I saw you put that snotty tissue in there." "I called ahead and rented the biggest truck they have." "I appreciate your help." "I gotta say, I was kinda surprised when you offered." "Well, Vesuvius was a big deal for you, right?" "Vesuvius was gonna be my legacy." "How I would be rembered long after I'm gone." "I was thinking the new Vesuvius could be my legacy also." "Three years in this house and I'm only known for is liking foosball and guys." "No... not really." "You ever notice that I'm the only guy without a nickname?" " What about Wade?" " Freshman year, couldn't swim?" "Then let's leave our mark." "Great." "So what's Wade's real name?" "Wade." " Pleasure doing business with you." " Thanks, man." "Appreciate it." " You sure you don't mind?" " Yeah, don't worry about it." "It's fine." "No way." "The kts are going through with this?" "The way Cappie left that meeting, I thought for sure you guys would..." " ... back out." " We're backing in." "Yeah, I don't know what that means." "Give Casey my condolences." "That's what he said, Frannie." "Good one, Spitter." "We're here for the twenty foot stakebed." " Homecoming, right?" " Yeah." "I love you guys." "The float thing has been great for business." "I'd love to help you, but I just rented it out." "What do you mean "just"?" "Guy before you paid me double the rental rate." "Evan stole our truck." "Come on, guys." "Let's get started on the float." " I'm gonna..." " Yeah, me too." "No, even if you throw in a bike rack, a Winnebago doesn't work." "I need a twenty-foot flat bed." "Thank you." " You still don't have a truck?" " Not exactly." "Rus, we need something with wheels, now." "At this point, I'd settle for a trailer or a donkey cart." "In order to do the stream, we need a truck." "And we have to do the stream because we have to guarantee that we win this thing." " Eden must be biblical." " Eden must travel to the stadium." "Fine." "I'll go get a truck." "A huge truck." "You just start building the float on those pallets and leave room for a stream." "Hello?" "Hey Ashleigh." "Oh, my God." "What are you doing in there?" "Let me in." "Why not?" "Ashleigh, look, no offense." "Just go away." "Please." "What are you doing?" "You're starting to scare me." "I can explain." "I didn't think anyone was going to be here." "Oh my God." "The reason I didn't tell you about this, is because" "I saw how you and Casey reacted to the Cru on the quad..." "You almost ruined my new white jacket." "Yeah, and then" " how you said the Cru was embarrassing." " Yeah, but I..." "But, Ash look..." "I have wanted to be a Trident Cru ever since I was a kid." "I always thought it was so cool." "You know?" "Total anarchy, dressing crazy, yelling whatever you want." "Ash, it's like all the things I'm not in real life  and  it feels great." "Look, Adam's light saber." "I don't think Adam had a light saber." "Look I'm Eve." "Who wants to help me find a snake?" "OK, Case." " The kts have gone native." " And some girls have gone with them." " Where's Rusty?" "He could help." " He's still getting the stupid truck." "We need to think like Kappa Taus." "What could we say to get their attention?" " What about Cappie?" " No." "This is the new kind of Cappie and Casey where we do things, without him." "What "new kind of Cappie and Casey"?" "Never mind." "You're a genius, Ash." "Come on." "Who wants to see Rebecca's boobs?" "That's your plan?" " Seen those." " I'll pass." "My boobs are awesome." "I'm dating your brother." "That'd be really creepy." "Who wants to see Ashleigh's boobs?" "All right." "Now that I have your attention." "Who gives the most kick ass parties at Cru?" "We do." "And what is the most kick ass party the kts have ever given?" " Vesuvius." " What do we need to get Vesuvius back?" " Money." " And where are we gonna get that money?" "Charge people to look at Ashleigh's boobs?" "No." "Build the float." "Build the float." "Build the float." "You are gonna be fine without Cappie." "Barkeep." "Two of whatever you got on tap." " Sound good?" " Yeah, it's fine." "This may sound corny, but I can't tell you how much I've looked forward to this." "Having a beer with my son." "Who is truly following in my footsteps." " I'm really proud of you." " Dad, come on." "Let me enjoy this." "You should, too." " Here's to you." " All right." "Is it ever weird for you though?" "What?" "The money?" "I mean it does change things, doesn't it?" "You know, do you ever worry that people only like you because of it?" "But then you felt weird if you don't pick up the tab or share it because you've got so much more than they do?" "You talking about anyone in particular?" "And yes." "Frannie, a little." "Some of the guys from the house." "And Patrick." "Your brother?" "Yeah, I gave him a small loan maybe a month or so ago." "It's really hard to say no sometimes." "It's a skill that comes with maturity." "You'll get there." " Where have you guys been?" " Getting a truck." "From where?" "Wyoming?" "The rental company didn't have anything left, so we had to go to five places just to get something that moved." "It's in the front." " We had to come in and open the gate." " So, what do you think?" "Cute?" "No." "Don't even think about it." " What?" " I know that look." "It's great." "It's finished." "This float will win." "Do not change anything." "Promise me." "All right." "I promise." "Thank you." "No one gets everything exactly the way they want it, Rus." " You really think this can win?" " Nope." "But we did promise not to change anything." "That is true." "But we did not say anything about improving it." "A cheerleader." "That's funny." "I never would have guessed that." "Why don't you show me some of your cheers?" " What..." "What happened to our float?" " Rusty." "What have you done?" "Wait for it." "I'll be Eve." "I'm Adam." "Tempted?" "What a beautiful baby." "Vesuvius." "One, I'm really pissed at you for not listening to me." "And two, this is amazing." "I can't believe you pulled it off." "It's out?" "We used the truck alternator as generator." "Without a regulator switch, it's problematic." "You think?" "Which is why Heath and I are going to pick one up now." "Meet us at the stadium parking lot for judging." "The keys are in the truck." "Tailgate." "Hey, I thought we were meeting at the stadium." "No, we wanted to talk to you." "What's going on?" "Your father told me about your discussion at the bar." "And we're concerned." " This is about Patrick?" " No." "It's about you." "I thought a lot about what you said about your feelings, about having more money than your friends, your sense of obligation to share it." "And that's a bad thing?" "We were just talking." "It made us realize that we might have overestimated your ability to handle this." " It's a lot of money." " Yeah, but it's my money." "I've been keeping my end of the arrangement." "I've applied for law school." "I haven't gotten married." "Been keeping my grades up." "I can't believe this." "We just want to help." "Hey Rebecca?" "Would you mind helping me get the food in Casey's car?" "I keep telling you, you're asking me all wrong." "Yes, I mind." "Thank you." "You're not cheating on Fisher with one of the blue freaks, are you?" "Because if you are, I'll take him." "Fisher is one of the blue freaks." "Never mind, all yours." "What can I do?" "I finally find the right guy and he turns out to be the wrong color." " Does that make me prejudiced?" " No, it just makes you sane." "And now he wants me to share it with him." "He wants me to dress up, and paint my face, and be a Crupie." "Cheerleader for a cheerleader?" "How redundant." "Welcome CRU students, faculty and alumni to our homecoming football game against the AM Farm Hands." "Cyprus-Rhodes University thanks all of you for attending." "So let's show our spirit and help send our seniors off with a victory in their final home game." "Nice barbecue, Pickle." "If you stare at the fire long enough, it starts to look like magma." "So where are you?" "I'm on my way, Rus." "I had to get gas." "Someone forgot to check the level of the tank when they picked up the truck." " What?" " Hello?" "Hey..." " Is there a problem?" " Casey's on her way." "Come on." "It's only a couple miles to the..." "No, you're fine." "Hey, Jordan, come here." "This fig leaf is really working its mojo with the ladies." "Why are you hugging me?" "I lost my fig leaf." "The front one." "I got it." "Spitter, I got it." "I got it, Spitter." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Heath, it's to your right." "The Omega Chi IKAP float is now on display." "Featuring Antony and Cleopatra." " Checking out the winning float?" " Yeah, if there was a "Most Likely to be Yawned At" category." "So where's the KT/ZBZ entry?" "You did know it had to be here to be in the contest?" "It's coming." "It just took a little longer than expected because Rusty added a few extras." "You mean, like this?" "Look." "Antony and Cleopatra are kissing." "Pretty cool, Rus?" " You did not build this." " Actually, we did." "But the hydraulics it would take to power this..." "Were designed by Dr. Robert Dimano." "So you hired a mechanical engineering professor?" " That's against the rules." " I thought some girl in your house" " designed this?" " I never said that." "As long as the float is built by the students, and isn't lewd or offensive, it's totally legal." "I so want to hit her." " Me too." " Yeah, me three." "Look, Rus, I'm sorry, I didn't know." "Where's my phone?" "Pick up, pick up, pick up." "Hey, this is Rusty." "Leave a message." "I'm sorry." "The voice mailbox of the subscriber you are calling is full." "Please try your call another time." "Thank you." "It's me." "Come on out and see who's going to win the $2000 prize." "For best float." "Rusty, the Omega Chi float is pretty good." " You think we can beat it?" " As long as Casey gets here." " Where the hell is she?" " Hey Spitter, almost forgot." "I found your cell." "Yeah, you left it on the table." "I used it for a cover when you looked for my fig leaf." "Good thing for me, it was a flip phone." "It's Casey." "The truck broke down." "She's not going to make it." "We're going to lose." "The Omega Chis are going to win." "It's over." "Vesuvius doesn't have to be our legacy, we'll think of something better." "I know you will." "It's too late for me." "What are you talking about?" "I just..." "I wanted to do something awesome before I graduated." "Heath, you're a junior, right?" "You have a lot of time." "No, I don't." "I'm graduating at the end of the semester." "Wait." "You're graduating early?" "I took a lot of AP classes in high school." "I started CRU as a sophomore." "I start medical school in the fall." "You're kidding, right?" "I saw the Iki float, and it's really good." "Where's Casey?" "The truck broke down." "She's not going to make it." "But we can't let the Ikis win." "Ash, they're not going to win." "You're going to have your legacy before you graduate." "All right." "Come on." "What?" "I know I technically violated our agreement to..." "You know, keep each others lives separate." "But..." "Is that the carburetor?" "Yes, that's the carburetor." "I don't think it's the carburetor." "Right." "Sorry." "I want you to know, it was a true emergency." "You were the only person I could get who wasn't too drunk to drive." "What did the Auto Club say?" "I  forgot to call the Auto Club." "Your car breaks down, you have an Auto Club membership, and instead of calling them, you call me, who you know knows next to nothing about cars." "Give me the card." "I'll call them." " Thank you." " Yeah!" "Heath?" "The beer?" "Genius." "It just seemed right." "And it was my idea." "The floats are that way." "It's a good thing your pretty." "So they're going to freeze my trust for six months, and they want me to see a therapist." ""Hey, Doc," ""I'm having trouble being a greedy bastard." ""Can you help me out?" "And do I have to pay you?"" "My dad sent me to a therapist because he was convinced I was a shopaholic." " Really?" " It was great." "The therapist helped me see that I was buying expensive crap, which i was, to get back at my father for treating me like some kind of prop in his political career." " Did you stop?" " No." "But now when I do it, I know why." "It makes it a lot more gratifying." "Not as gratifying as if he treated me like I was someone special in his life." "Think you'll ever stop waiting for that moment?" "God, I hope so." "And in the meantime, I guess you take what you can get." "Unless they change, what other choice is there?" "Do you want some gum?" "Why are you so pissed at me?" "It was an honest mistake." "It's like there's this tractor beam that seems to pull me toward you no matter what I do, and I am trying to shut it down." "I'm trying to make it go away." " It's nearly..." " You think I planned this?" "You think I rigged the contest?" "So the kts and ZBZs worked together, sabotaged the truck, then told Rusty not to answer his phone, got the girls drunk at the tailgate so they couldn't get me and forgot to call the Auto Club, so you could rescue me." "I don't want to wonder anymore about what you're thinking, what you're doing or who you're doing it with." "You were right." "I need to move on, but I don't know if I can if..." "Unless you stop." " Stop what?" " I'm sorry I called." "I'm sorry I keep talking to you." "I'm trying to do better." "What else can I do?" "I don't know." "Just, stop making me so crazy." " Stop being so paranoid." " Stop telling me what to do." "Stop wasting your life on stupid things." "Stop making me want your approval." "Stop always being there when I need you." "Stop yelling at each other and tell me what's wrong with the damn truck." " It's the alternator." " It's the carburetor." "Right." "How about I just tow it?" "But, you're not..." " You're not blue." " I know." "I just..." "I can't do it." "It's not me." " Wha..." "What do you mean?" " I mean, that I thought about it and" "I know you love doing this, but, I just, I don't think I can go that far  be that crazy and  wear what you're not wearing." "Of all people, I thought that you would understand." "This is my way of showing my spirit, OK?" " I just wanted to share that with you." " I know, Fisher." "But there's a fine line between spirit and spectacle." "You wear giant flowers and pom-poms and leg warmers on your arms." "These are not leg warmers." "And what?" "You think my clothes are as extreme as this?" "No." "But I think your clothes say you're open and adventurous." "Which are two things that make me so crazy about you." "I want to say "aw"" "but it's hard to take you seriously when your face is blue." "You said that I should keep an open mind, right?" "Well, that's all I'm asking of you." "May I have your attention, please?" "Float judging is about to begin outside Tunnel 2." "We chose Antony and Cleopatra, because what she did for Antony has inspired women through the ages." "Their legendary romance has captured the imagination..." "Poor Calvin." "Caught in the cross-fire." "What ever happened between you two anyway?" "You know how in baseball there's a pitcher and a catcher?" "Yeah." "Well, I didn't." "I'm not too big of a sports fan." "Calvin is, so..." "It didn't work out." "Frannie, I think we might want to stop the float." " What?" " This isn't good." "You're not dressed?" "We're already late" " for the Dean's reception." " I'm not going." " Excuse me?" " Dad?" "It's alright." "We'll talk tomorrow when you've had some time to think about our discussion, and cool down." "Like I did after you laid out the strings attached to my trust fund?" "It's not going to happen, Mom." "I've decided I don't want my trust fund." " For Pete's sake." " I'm serious." "It's no good to me if it can't buy what I want." "Which is actual parents, not two business associates who happen to share my last name." "Do you think I could buy that, with all the millions in my trust fund?" "See?" "I didn't think so, either." "So, it's not really much good to me." "It hasn't really brought me much but suspicion and grief." "And a very nice car." "I would like to keep the car." "Don't play this game with us." "You'll lose." "I've already lost, Dad." " I'm looking for a new game." " Evan, please." "No." "If that's the way he wants it." " Let's go home." " That's the way it is." " When you change your mind..." " Dad." "Goodbye." "You guys have a safe trip home." "Baby, Vesuvius!" "Your daddy would be so proud." "That float prank." " I love happy endings." " Too tight!" " It's too tight, Beav!" " OK." "I'm sorry." "The CRU football team actually won." "Andy had two interceptions, but all anyone is talking about is yours and Heath's float prank." "There was no big volcano, but that pyramid definitely blew a boatload of beer." "Look like you got your legacy after all." "Wasn't the legacy I was expecting." "It still bums me out that Natalie and the Gamma Psis won." "Heidi and Spencer's Fake Wedding?" " How lame is that?" " Totally." "But look on the bright side." "Maybe next year you can blow up their float too." "Trident Slow-Mo Machine!" "You are so weird." "Is that" "OK?" "From skeptic to Blue Man groupie in two short days." "Ash sure is unpredictable." "She's also very lucky." "You know, I'm going to go home." "You think they're blue all over?" "Good night Becks." "Night." "You don't seem too shook up about the volcano." "My legacy is going to be about something different than volcanoes and floats." "Whatever it is, try not to waste so much beer." " Have you considered whipped cream?" " No, I'm talking about brotherhood." "I helped Heath make his mark at Kappa Tau." "Yep." "He's going to medical school." "I hear he wants to be a heart surgeon." "I was thinking, we could give him a nickname." "Something like Doc." "Or..." "Dopey." "Something fitting." "I hope you're not stressing about the float contest." "So we didn't whip Frannie's Icky ass like we wanted to." "But at least she didn't win." "We'll get them next time." "I'm actually not thinking about Frannie or her Icky ass." "I'm thinking about the Garden of Eden." "The strip club on Highway 90?" "Adam and Eve." "You know, I never would've expected my "Adam" would turn out to be a blue guy in a fork hat." "I never expected to miss him so much." "Max'll be back in less than a week." "You're almost there." "I'm not talking about Max."