"LEAP YEAR" "Hello?" "Hi, Mom." "Fine." "And you?" "Good." "What are you guys doing?" "Oh, it's raining?" "Yeah, tomorrow is February already." "What did you have for lunch?" "Sounds delicious." "And who made it, you or Grandma?" "Delicious..." "Who?" "Really?" "That's nice." "Did you say hello for me?" "Good afternoon. I'm Laura López from Your Business magazine." "Fine, thank you." "And you?" "Good." "Let me explain." "In our May edition, we're offering 30 tips to take advantage of the economic crisis." "I was wondering if you could share your ideas." "Exactly." "You think he wants to build a house for my brother and I?" "But Dad left that property to me, Mom." "But, Mom!" "At the club I drink vodka." "I like the Mandarin." "So you're a designer?" "Listen, Raúl." "I think she's an idiot." "She's light-skinned so she thinks she's hot shit." "Well, it's up to you, but I don't think she's good for you." "OK..." "Yes, I ate already." "I ate with Miguel." "Actually, he just left." "Yeah, he left me a sink full of dirty dishes." "He made me some chow fan." "Chow fan." "A kind of Chinese fried rice." "He made it with shrimp." "He's fine, he's got a new boyfriend." "Yeah, they went to Acapulco." "Exactly." "It's like you're watching them." "That's because they're all the same." "Yes." "I know, except for you." "What time did you tell her you'd call?" "OK, then we'll talk tomorrow." "A big kiss." "I love you." "I always use one." "Big ones, small ones and in all flavours." "And there's no risk of infection." "It's great." "You add the amount of lubricant you want." "Hi, Mom." "Yeah, the phone battery died." "Nothing, having dinner." "I made steak." "Why don't we talk about it when I'm there?" "Yes, I'll think about it." "Mom, I'm having dinner!" "OK." "You too." "Would you pass me my pants?" "Hi, honey." "Were you asleep?" "Yeah, I'm sorry." "No, I'm on my way." "Give me about five minutes." "Yeah, I do to." "See you in a bit, OK?" "Did you make up?" "So what did you tell her?" "Oh, Raúl..." "Well, like Grandma says, "lt takes two to tango."" "Raúl!" "Nothing, just here..." "Hey, guess what." "They set up a funfair near my house." "And tomorrow, I'm going and buying pecan bread, I'm taking a ride on the carrousel and I'm going to be very happy." "You tell me." "OK, perfect." "Do you want me to go get you?" "OK, it's up to you." "Yes, I'll see you here." "OK." "Sleep on the bus, all right?" "Kiss kiss!" "How are you?" "I'm fine, and you?" "I asked you first." "How did it go?" "Good." "Very tiring." " Why?" " The bus took eight hours." "Eight hours?" "Yes." "Say, this place is looking good." "It's coming along, right?" "Happy to see you're using the StairMaster." "What did Mom say?" "Nothing." "Call her later." "How is she?" "With her boyfriend, same as always." "And Grandma?" "She still has that eye problem." "She has to have an operation." " When?" " At the end of the month." "I'll see how much work I have then." "How is it going with Sofia?" "It's going..." "What are you doing on the 1 4th?" "I guess a movie and then dinner." "And you?" "I get to meet Miguel's new boyfriend." "Are you ready?" "I'll take a shower and we'll go?" "Get your feet off my bed." "...governments end up broke, so they stop paying for health care, education, all the public services." "Since they're out of money, they sell assets." "Then, what's left?" "Security." "The only thing the US government takes care of." "And when security is your only political function and your only source of legitimacy, you've got to make people feel at risk." "That way, they need you and pay you." "Get it?" "Don't you miss Oaxaca?" "It's fucking hicksville." "I have lots of friends here." "I'm doing really well, I'm very happy." "Take care." "Have a safe trip." "Oso... hi." "No, not at all." "What's up?" "What happened?" "That's what he told me, I've got the recording." "But who told you that?" "And how do they know?" "Come on, how can he be a fraud?" "But you sent me the contact, you chose him as "Entrepreneur of the Year."" "How was I supposed to know?" "Yeah, maybe I should have checked." "You're my editor." "I thought it was the magazine's choice." "Well, fine." "Well, don't publish it, then." "It's already in all the stands?" "Sorry." "Forgive me, Oso." "How was I supposed to know?" "Sorry..." "Yeah... I understand." "But making the reporter the scapegoat isn't fair." "Until July?" "Of course I have other jobs!" "I'm with Adolfo and..." "Yes!" "I understand." "All right." "I'll wait to hear from you." "Bye, Oso." "Give me a second." "Did you come?" "Why do men always want to know that?" "My name is Arturo." "I know." "What did you say your name was?" "Why do you want to know?" "Adolfo, it's Laura." "López." "No, I'm with Your Business magazine with Oso." "Hello, how are you?" "We met at the Irish pub a couple of months ago." "Are you busy?" "OK, perfect." "Who's doing your news briefs?" "I just gave up a regular contribution and I have some time." "Perfect, I'll send them right away." "And is it OK if I call you Monday at 1 1 ?" "OK, perfect." "Have you got Carlos's phone number at Latin Enterprises?" "OK, perfect." "Thanks a lot, Arturo." "Adolfo, sorry." "So I'll call you Monday at 1 1 ." "Thanks a lot." "Hello, ma'am, may I speak to Carlos Guerra, please?" "Hold on!" "It's the green one." "What?" "Did I hurt you?" "No." "Do you happen to have any whiskey?" "Laura López Martinez?" "Busybody." "Have you lived in Mexico long?" "Do you like it?" "I like this building." "Downstairs there's an old couple who are like my parents." "I often have dinner with them." "My neighbour across the hall is my best friend." "Sometimes we go out with her boyfriend." "The day we met, they had just left." "I take the kids upstairs to the fair when their mother is busy." "The building isn't that nice, but I feel..." "..protected." "What do you want to know about me?" "Nothing." " Not even if I..." " No." "Do you know what time it is?" "I have to go." "THE ART OF loving" "Shut up!" "You lunatic!" "You're completely paranoid!" "You lunatic!" "Go on, get lost!" "Goodbye!" "Hi." "What's up?" "Where?" "And what are you doing here?" "It's that college expo thing, right?" "What time did you get here?" "Where are you?" "Yeah, come over." "DON'T COME OVER." "I HAVE COMPANY." "What's up?" "I've been knocking for ages." "How are you?" "Fine. I was blow-drying my hair." "Typical woman..." "Who is it?" "A friend. I'll call her later." "After the expo, will you take me out?" "Where do you want to go?" " What time should we be there?" " At 1 0 am." "Let's go." "OK then." "Who the fuck were you with?" "When?" "The text message you sent." "Don't play dumb!" "With my brother." "You're a fucking liar." "Thank you." "You're welcome." "I don't like it." "Can I borrow them?" "An elderly rat" "And a presser, at that" "While ironing her skirt" "To a crisp her tail burnt" "Some ointment she applied" "Then a rag on it she tied" "But the poor lady rat" "Was bobtailed, that's a fact" "Tell me something no one else knows about you." "One day, I'm going to have a son." "I'll name him Ariel." "And I'll love him dearly." "And the two of us will be very happy together." "Very far away from here." "My butt hurts." "Don't be a crybaby." "You know, I'm going to be an actor." "Oh yeah?" "About a year ago, I was in a commercial." "It was never on TV, but they paid me and everything." "Wow." "And I've also done lots of auditions." "Will you still talk to me when you're famous?" "Why is that day marked in red?" "No reason." "Come on, tell me." "On the 29th, it will be four years since my dad died." "How many people die on February 29th?" "I don't know." "The ones who have to, I suppose." "Move the table." "Move it!" "Close your eyes." "Face up." "Masturbate." "I said masturbate, goddamn it!" "Close your eyes." "Do you want some quesadillas?" "No." "If you want something else I can go to the store." "What does it feel like to be pissed on?" "Warm." "Tell me more about yourself." "What do you want to know?" "When did you lose your virginity?" "When I was 1 2." "Who with?" "It's none of your business." "What do you want to do to me?" "The other one." "Hello, Oso." "A little, but I'm listening." "Thanks a lot, Oso, but... there's a small problem." "I'm leaving the country." "No, to live." "To Switzerland." "To work at an embassy." "Yeah, the Mexican embassy." "Thank you." "The day after tomorrow." "Yes, I'm packing like crazy." "My mom has a friend who's a diplomat." "OK, perfect." "Yes, of course, we'll stay in touch by email." "Yes, I'll send you a postcard when I get there." "Of course." "All right, go to your meeting." "Thank you." "Why don't you cut me?" "Would you like to cut my throat while you fuck me?" "Come inside of me, while you watch me die?" "You start by cutting my breasts." "Can you imagine the blood coming out?" "You spread it all over my body." "Then you put it in me... ..and while you fuck me..." "..I'll be looking into your eyes." "You can make a hole here... ..and another one here." "And that way, I'll bleed to death." "But I can keep talking to you the whole time." "And since I'm dying anyway, you can hit me." "Cut me." "Burn me." "You can do anything you want to me." "Meanwhile I'll look into your eyes, and I'll tell you I love you." "And when I can no longer move, and I'm very weak..." "..and I'm dead,... ..you can come inside my corpse." "Would you kill me?" "Don't worry." "Nobody will find out." "No one knows you know me." "I can leave you clean clothes in the dining room." "And a bag so you can take the dirty clothes." "You can wear gloves so you don't leave any fingerprints." "And I'll leave you the neighbour's number, so they can find my body." "Can you come tomorrow at 1 0 pm?" "Please?" "What are you doing here?" "What happened?" "Come here." "She broke up with me." "There, there." "She says I'm taking things too seriously." "She didn't even let me explain." "There, there, Raúl..." "Come here." "Don't cry." "Calm down." "There will be other girls." "There will be lots of people who will love you." "We'll always have each other." "You're my little brother." "And I'm your sister." "is this Dad's?" "Yes." "When did you take it?" "The last time I went to Oaxaca." "Mom didn't even notice, did she?" "You know what day it is?" "When I was a girl..." "..I thought my dad was the greatest person in the world." "He was a good person." "Everything will be all right." "Everything will be all right." "He didn't come."