"Four years old." "Ready, steady, go!" "It's a pivotal age." "I'll tell teacher, then." "Watch where you're going." "This is where futures are formed." "I love tidying up beds." "I'm not listening to you!" "As adults, we take so much for granted in terms of the rituals of social interaction." "We have conventions that we can follow." "Thank you." "That's very nice of you." "Are you going to be my best friend?" "Four-year-olds, they are discovering all of that for the first time." "If you eat too many, you're going to die!" "In a nursery like no other, every corner has been rigged with cameras and wired for sound..." "Hello." "..so scientists can observe how children learn the skills fundamental to adult life." "Share, otherwise we won't give things to you." "Do I have to?" "With unprecedented access to every tussle... ..every whisper..." "..and all the raw emotion." "Why do you ask always to have it every time?" "As 10 children meet for the very first time, we eavesdrop on their secret lives." "It's October, and the children are making their first visit to this specially rigged nursery." "Here they'll be overseen by two highly trained teachers, and waiting to observe every moment are scientists specialising in childhood development." "As the morning gets underway," "Chaim is collecting as many toys as possible." "No!" "No!" "I need those two." "I need those two." "GIRL CRIES" "He's not going to give me my van back." "Did he just take it, did he?" "Yeah!" "I needed two people." "And then I needed one more." "But how did you get that other one?" "Did you just take it from what Aniya was using?" "Or did you ask first?" "Asked." "Are you sure?" "Some boisterous behaviour is very natural at this age and in fact, we are primates and we have a social order and boisterous behaviour amongst boys can be a very determining factor in terms of where they are in the pecking order." "I think it's every father's dream to have a boy, to carry on the family name and the icing on the cake was that he was a beautiful, blonde-haired, blue-eyed boy." "My husband totally idolises him." "Chaim's dad is a businessman and Mum is a solicitor." "I don't think Chaim struggles with anything, apart from maybe listening." "Chaim, didn't Daddy say no?" "If we weren't working parents, we'd probably be stricter." "Bang!" "But because he's so cute and so lovely and so sweet, we're easy going with him, you know?" "I don't want a spin." "He's got two very strong sisters." "So he's used to being assertive." "Stop it!" "Sometimes he's too confident, because I'd like him to have that fear factor to know the boundaries, but there doesn't seem to be any boundaries." "Honk, honk, honk!" "Chaim's moved on from gathering toys to playing chase with Christian and Luke." "Honk, honk!" "Watch where you're going." "Honk, honk, honk!" "Hey, I was sitting there first." "Get off!" "I was sitting down first." "Get off!" "Please don't do that to my friend." "I was sitting there first." "Doesn't matter." "You get up, you lose your seat." "Hey, that's not nice!" "I'm going to tell teacher on you." "We're telling." "I'd say Christian is fun." "He's also very particular." "He can't just wear any old shirt - it's got to be a particular shirt." "The trousers have to sit just right on top of the shoe." "Because it has to be just right." "Even if you saw him line up his cars, he'll line them up in perfect order." "I don't know where he's got it from." "His mum blames me, but I don't think so." "I think it's her." "Christian is a middle child." "His dad is an IT consultant and Mum runs a beauty business." "He's very much a right and wrong person." "For doing good things and helping others." "I hope he wouldn't be somebody's manager, because he'd really wind his employees up." "I can see him being a soldier or a general, because I can see him ordering about his troops." "He is a bit..." "Yeah, he is a bit of an old man!" "Yeah, he is." "He needs to lighten up sometimes and just be happy, be a kid." "CHRISTIAN CHUCKLES" "Chaim and Christian have the only two bodyboards in the playground." "I done bodyboard!" "Bodyboard!" "Chaim, after you, can I have a turn?" "But I'm doing bodyboard and I just started." "Why do you ask always to have it when everyone has just started every time?" "If they just started, uh...uh... everybody goes on different things." "Chaim feels unable to resist the temptation to hoard resources rather than share them out." "Sharing is really important, not just because it's a matter of fairness to the people around you, but because it forms the basis of friendships." "I think it's interesting that you are see in-groups forming and they're not including Chaim." "When the children are together in their in-group, it gives them the power to stand up to Chaim." "He cheated." "We didn't say it yet." "Ready, steady, go!" "I'll tell teacher, then." "How do you make friends?" "Say that you're a nice person, then they'll be your friend." "You just say hello to them and say your name." "Be nice." "Do lots of people want to be your friend?" "Yes." "Because I'm cute." "For a long time?" "The girls are bonding over at the water tray." "They're determined to keep it a boy-free zone." "Well done!" "I describe Skyla as high-energy, funny... likes to be the centre of attention." "Skyla's parents work in the performing arts." "When she was little, we didn't stop going out to shows or festivals." "We took her." "She's good with adults and children." "She needs to know that not everything she wants she'll get." "No kisses." "I don't want her to be spoilt." "When she's around adults, she wants the adults to be focusing on her." "She's got me wrapped around her little finger." "When we discipline her, she tries her method with us." "You know, the crying." "It's finished now!" "I like the proper, like..." "HE SOBS" "No tears." "No tears." "You can see the fakeness." "The fakeness..." "SKYLA SOBS" "Skyla has missed out on break-time cookies." "What can we do?" "Shall we have a look?" "Yeah?" "And see what we can find." "Skyla at the moment has a concept of herself in which she is usually at the centre of attention." "Simon says, sit down!" "When that concept is challenged, she doesn't deal with it terribly well." "SKYLA SOBS" "What happened?" "You want to be Simon?" "Well, would you like to do Simon Says again after this game?" "Because we're moving on to another game." "But everybody's finished doing it." "Skyla is a very interesting character, because when you see her in this group of other children, she's definitely not that forthcoming." "I can detect an unwillingness to venture into the territory of the other children." "Whenever there's an adult, she will go to the adult rather than another child." "Jessica is determined to make friends with Skyla." "You can't leave me alone!" "After two hours spent chasing, Jessica finally gives up on Skyla." "I know you're not finished, but you can do that in a minute, after you eat your dinner." "She loves playing at Mums and Dads." "The first visit to the nursery is coming to an end." "These 10 children who started out as strangers have become competitors... ..allies... and friends." "Thank you." "Thank you." "That's very nice of you." "Are you going to be my best friend?" "Yeah, cos I am your best friend." "Skyla was playing with me just now, but she's not playing with me now." "Is Skyla your friend?" "Yes." "We never see each other, cos we're new friends." "But are you my friend now?" "Yeah." "Well, kind of." "I'm not just your friend " "I'm just her friend and your friend." "That's what I mean." "Over the next six months, the children will develop rapidly as their experience of the world around them grows." "How will Chaim, Christian, Jessica and Skyla have changed when they meet again?" "No!" "Give that back!" "This time, joined by some new playmates." "Dad's cooking something and he doesn't know what he's going to be cooking." "We're following a group of children as they take their first steps towards independence." "What, you want some pancakes?" "After six months of rapid development, the children are back at the nursery, and this time they're joined by some new playmates." "Right, that needs to be washed." "Eavesdropping on every word are scientists, keen to examine how the children's skills have developed." "I'd like to come to the shop." "Will you give me some eggs?" "OK." "Bye!" "Six months may not seem very long to adults, but to children, it's an age, so there have been huge changes in the intervening time." "One is the child's language skills - how much they can talk, and secondly, their social interaction with adults and with peers." "We're trapped." "While the boys get to know each other in the den," "Jessica is trying to rekindle an old friendship." "Jessica, do you remember me?" "Yeah." "I don't remember you." "The first time I actually saw your face..." "Come on, what do you want to do, Skyla?" "Oh, I know!" "These, Skyla." "Skyla!" "Skyla!" "Skyla!" "I hate pink." "Jessica lives with brother Jake, Mum, a classroom volunteer and Dad, a welder." "Half-sister Millie often visits." "Jessica's always been a happy, bubbly little girl." "She goes round hugging everybody and she's quite caring." "The family has recently moved to Hastings." "Jake and Jessica have adapted really well to the move." "She's got a couple of best friends already, but when they're horrible to her, she gets upset, doesn't she?" "Yeah." "That's the side you don't see of her." "I can see a pirate and a mermaid!" "I'd like to see Jess see the world before she settled down." "She just seems to be a special little girl, really." "Jessica's come up with a new plan to impress Skyla." "When I was a baby, I got swine flu and swine flu is when you get a bit too hot." "I went at the doctors." "I was nearly dead and my heart couldn't breathe." "Yeah?" "And that's it." "So you died?" "Well, I didn't die, but I nearly." "No." "Hello?" "Hello." "I love tidying up beds." "That's my job." "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!" "Last time Chaim was at the nursery, he found it difficult to bond with some of the others." "Today he's making his own entertainment." "He wants old sparring partner Christian to join him." "Shall I show you where it is?" "Yes." "Come." "Look, I'm boxing." "CHAIM LAUGHS" "What do you have to do that for?" "Here we see Chaim trying to reach out to Christian, but Christian's really having none of it." "And I think it's because their play styles are very different." "Chaim like spontaneous, boisterous, rule-breaking play, whereas Christian likes rigid rules." "He likes things to be constructed." "So very got very diametrically opposite play styles here." "Can I play, guys?" "Christian is overseeing the construction of a police station." "Where's the door?" "Look, here's the door, in this corner here." "Christian's really evolved to become the dominant force amongst the boys." "He's got to this leadership position subtly, just by exerting control over the other members of the group." "And what's amazing is the other kids take it." "Can you go get me some more bricks?" "Let me put them down." "Do you need that?" "No, it's too small." "Here you go." "Not yet." "I need some more bricks to finish that half." "We did a very good police station." "Christian's masterpiece needs just one final touch." "What is that part?" "The chimney." "It sprays up in there." "Oops!" "Ooopsy!" "Cuba's very outgoing, very bubbly." "He's generally very happy." "His whole face lights up." "Cuba lives on a houseboat." "His dad's an ex-boxer and Mum is an artist." "Having only just turned four, he's one of the youngest at the nursery." "We have lots of fruit." "He's just so full of natural knowledge." "He can tell adults what berries you can and can't eat." "Oranges, pears, tomatoes." "The main thing with him, he's really inquisitive." "He likes anything new." "He gets bored really easily." "He has to be kept occupied." "What's that like?" "Too strong." "If Cuba doesn't get his own way, he can be a real horror, actually." "I'm making a fireplace, but mine's better than yours." "Look at my fireplace." "Yours is rubbish." "It's not nice to say other people's things are rubbish." "It's not really nice to say that." "Cuba..." "I can't make Cuba out." "In some senses, he's quite aware of the rules and is happy to enforce them." "On the other hand, he's quite happy to break the rules as well." "He doesn't seem to worry at all about crossing the line." "This is real, isn't it?" "I can't work out if this is just because he is still at a point where he's a little bit confused or whether there's also something a little Machiavellian in there, actually, and that's he's a rule-maker and a rule-breaker," "which would be very sophisticated." "What is sharing?" "When people want to play games with you and you let them." "Sharing is how you make friends." "Giving people stuff, or other people you are playing with." "I give my things to people." "Taking turns." "What would you say to someone who isn't sharing?" "Um...you've had a long go." "Please may I have a go?" "Out in the playground, there are two new toys." "A scooter!" "Wheeee!" "Why have they got scooters?" "I want a scooter." "Do you?" "Yeah." "Can I have a turn after you?" "Er...no." "Yeah, after me, but I'll say when it's your turn." "Can I have a turn after?" "Not yet!" "You can have one or more minutes." "That's not even long." "Two minutes." "Is that long?" "Yeah." "It's medium long." "Six minutes later, the girls still have the scooters." "I've got a red toilet upstairs and a green toilet downstairs." "In my house, I've got two toilets." "I've got two toilets too." "I've got a toilet upstairs and a toilet upstairs." "Really?" "Yeah." "Well, I'm not listening to you." "I'm not listening to YOU, then." "We're not listening to you because you're giving us a headache." "You're giving ME a headache!" "The girls have now had the scooters for nine minutes." "Can I have a turn now?" "No!" "It's my turn!" "The girls aren't letting me have a turn." "They're not sharing it?" "You've asked, haven't you?" "Cuba has decided to get involved." "You're just a tiny mouse in a purple toilet." "Give that!" "Ha!" "Your rubbish scooter." "You...just...you are actually a green toilet and I'm telling my cat to scratch your face!" "He actually threw that scooter!" "I'm telling you off." "Cuba has been observing the fact that Skyla has been hanging on to the scooter for a long time and he's decided to actually police the situation himself." "He smacked Skyla round the face." "Did he?" "Because they were being mean." "Girls, we do need to share now." "I shared with her." "What about the boys who have been waiting a very long time?" "Who are we going to let have their turn first?" "Even though the situation escalated into Cuba hitting her, which was wrong, there's almost a sense in which Cuba's risk-taking." "Not only has it taken Skyla by surprise, but it seems to have won a little bit of respect as well." "You can have the scooter." "OK." "Surprisingly, Skyla ends up giving Cuba the scooter." "Jessica, do you want to come to my house today?" "Morning in the nursery and romance is in the air." "Boys can't be boyfriends." "Spider!" "Eugh!" "Oh, my God!" "That is cool!" "Red lipstick!" "Wherever we go with Jayda, it's like having a little rock star following us behind." "Jayda's dad works in the film industry and Mum is a beautician." "Jayda thinks she's the boss." "Definitely. 100%." "Who told you how to lay the table?" "It's amazing." "I'm not sure if she's the parent or the daughter." "Like I said, eat it all up first." "Thanks very much!" "We both made the choice to have Jayda brought up in a bilingual family." "TRANSLATION:" "I try not to spoil her." "I'm quite strict with her." "She loves helping all her friends." "If she sees a girl crying, she'll pick them up give her a hug." "She's a very, very loving, larger-than-life character." "The girls are performing for the teacher." "Skyla's not taking part." "THEY SING" "Getting better!" "I heard a little bit of Jessica this time." "Right, you have to do it in a big loud voice, like this." "Watch me." "# See the donkey in a storm." "# Eey-ore, eey-ore is his call. #" "Go on." "Jayda actually has a very sophisticated understanding of what it takes to teach and that's quite special at this age." "She knew that Jessica lacked confidence and Jayda knew that" "Jessica needed some practice." "She identified there was a need to teach, and very touchingly, holding her hand in order to give her the emotional support she needed." "I was quite taken aback at that." "OK, sing with me." "Copy me." "Copy the words that I'm saying." "On the count of 3. 1, 2, 3." "BOTH: # See the donkey in a storm" "# Eey-ore, eey-ore is his call. #" "I'm going to give you a clap!" "Thank you so much." "Here we've got a great little love triangle emerging amongst the girls." "Today Jessica is playing with Jayda and Skyla can't get a look-in." "Jayda is quite dominant." "Skyla is quite dominant." "So Jessica is really being torn between the two." "Look at this beautiful dress." "Let me have it!" "I want to be the princess." "I'll tie it up for you." "It's a zip." "Are you ever mean?" "No." "What's a mean thing to do?" "Don't play games properly." "What happens if someone is mean to you?" "I'll be cross and sad." "Tell the teacher." "I walk away from them and see another kid." "Are you always nice to people?" "No!" "Let's go back home." "How about you're the mum, I'm the sister and Skyla's the baby?" "No!" "You're going to be the baby." "The girls have been playing Mums and Dads for the last 20 minutes." "Are you the sister or the mummy?" "Mummy." "What's your name, Mummy?" "My name's Katie." "OK, Katie." "Katie Ella." "My name's Katie Matilda." "So you are all Katies in the same family?" "Yeah!" "Are you in the game as well?" "Is Skyla in the game too?" "No, Skyla's not in the game." "She's Katie nothing." "Na na na na na na!" "Ready, steady, go!" "Woo-hoo!" "Here we see Skyla for the first time really on the fringes of the group." "Jessica and Jayda have built a friendship and they are cementing that friendship even more by excluding Skyla from it." "Skyla, I said I would tell." "I'm going to put that somewhere else now." "You don't need to fuss!" "Stop following me now, Skyla." "Skyla, come with me." "No!" "Come with me, Skyla!" "Skyla, I said over there." "No!" "My eye!" "You don't just..." "What?" "You just kicked that and water splat on me." "Go away from me!" "Do you know there's a chocolate cake?" "What?" "Do you know there's a big chocolate cake?" "Yeah." "I know, I'm going to eat it." "I don't think we're allowed, do you?" "A chocolate cake has been left out as an end-of-day treat." "No instructions have been given, and the teacher has left the room." "What?" "Don't eat it." "BOYS GIGGLE" "So far, Chaim's the only one who's given in to temptation." "Hey, come on!" "No!" "I don't want to eat anything." "I'm not starving anyway." "Naughty behaviours in children can often be a sign of intelligence." "They don't just accept it." "They say," ""How much can I bend these rules to find out how they work?"" "They can be a sign of courage." "Everyone else is scared to break the rules, whereas I'm not scared." "Do you want to eat some?" "You're not allowed to eat the cake, do you know, guys?" "I told you off, Chaim." "I didn't tell you off, Christian, because you only ate a little bit, didn't you?" "I just picked it up." "I didn't tell you off." "I only told you off." "Boys, has anyone eaten some of my cake?" "I have." "You have?" "I didn't!" "You didn't eat the cake, did you?" "He just licked the cake and the ice." "Christian, did you lick the cake and the icing?" "No, I just got it on my hands." "Did you put it anywhere near your mouth?" "Oh, you did?" "That wasn't for now - that was for later." "Cos if you've had some now, you won't be able to have any later." "I said you're not allowed it." "Did you really?" "So what do you think we should do, boys?" "Is it OK that they just miss out later, when we all have one together?" "Yeah, but not him, not Chaim, because he already had one." "We have got a challenge for you today." "Yo!" "Has anyone made a den before?" "Done any den-building?" "That's what we're being today - we're going to be builders." "The den-building challenge tests the children's skills of teamwork and communication." "Two teams are selected." "The less dominant children are on side..." "This is a bunk bed." "..while on the other, the more dominant." "That thing next to the door is the doorbell." "Let's go and get the materials and bring them over here." "A team-based task is actually a big ask for children of this age." "This is the children's door." "Teamwork requires not just creativity in coming up with ideas, but it means negotiating and reaching some kind of compromise." "The less dominant team get off to a flying start." "Me and Olly are working together." "Good work, Luke!" "On the other side, Christian is trying to rally his troops." "Chaim, not like that!" "But his builders have other ideas." "Stop!" "You're messing it up!" "We need to work together." "To get the best out of a team, it takes more than just having a dominant personality." "There needs to be a personality there who can actually engage others quite quickly." "Chaim!" "Chaim!" "Stop!" "Stop moving it." "Stop!" "I have the scissors!" "Give that to me!" "We need scissors!" "Ouch!" "That really hurt." "Unable to work together, the dominant children lose interest and abandon their den..." "..whilst the less dominant children put the finishing touches to theirs." "Do you remember earlier we said that there was going to be a winner?" "Are you ready?" "Who's going to be the winner?" "OK...my team!" "TEAM:" "Yay!" "Here we've got a team of dominant individuals used to being the centre of attention." "Suddenly the spotlight has been shifted to the non-dominant individuals and this is something our dominant team finds quite hard to cope with." "How are you feeling?" "We didn't win." "Sad." "With the challenge over, most of the children go back to playing." "Chaim!" "What's really interesting is Christian's response to adversity." "Rather than just giving up and doing something else," "Christian goes back and works harder at the task he's just lost at." "This is a personality attribute that's much studied by psychologists." "It's called grit and determination and it's something Christian's got in spades." "What is this bump?" "You'll find out when you open it." "It's a new toothbrush." "Well, find out." "It's the end of the final day at the nursery and the children are opening their leaving presents." "Skyla's found something extra in hers." "What did Skyla get?" "Chocolate and a stilt." "Chocolate AND the stilts." "Can you share the chocolate?" "What do you think, Skyla?" "You can have more than us." "I'll just eat it, before it melts." "Don't!" "It's good to share, Skyla." "I don't think there's enough for everyone." "Are you sure?" "How many children do we have, Skyla?" "1, 2, 3, 4, 5." "How many bits?" "1, 2, 3, 4, 5." "Yay!" "You have to share!" "We have one each, OK?" "What are we going to do, Skyla?" "Do I have to?" "We've got five children." "But..." "But what?" "It is mine." "Share, otherwise we won't give things to you." "We won't share things to you, if she doesn't share her things." "Er..." "What do you think, Skyla?" "Skyla is experiencing a real inner conflict here." "On the one hand, she wants to eat the chocolate." "On the other hand, she's surrounded by her peers asking her to share." "You can see that she doesn't want to do it." "The tension is written all over her face." "Errr..." "I'm going to let you have a think about it, Skyla." "Stay there and decide what you're going to do." "Can I have one, please?" "Please!" "One for me." "That's not fair, cos we only just got these and Skyla got chocolate." "Can I have one?" "Er..." "No!" "No, give that back!" "SKYLA SOBS" "Give the chocolate back!" "Oh, goodness, what just happened?" "He snatched it from me." "Goodness!" "He took the chocolate from Skyla, and he didn't even say please." "You've got it in the corner of your mouth." "Chaim, really?" "Do we do that?" "Even though Skyla has temporarily lost her chocolate, this is where she gets the payout for pausing and thinking and beginning to share." "She's got a little social network now to fall back on and that's a very important reward." "Don't worry, Skyla, sharing is caring." "What do you need to go say to her?" "Sorry." "I think you better go do that right now." "Sorry." "Go up to her." "Thank you." "Did you already eat it?" "Sorry." "Chaim, she asked you a question." "Er..." "I don't know." "Just tell me - did you?" "He did, Skyla." "I asked." "You didn't." "I did." "Not properly." "I'm not going to share a chocolate with you ever again." "Sorry." "Come on now, let's play." "You can have that piece." "In fairness to Chaim, he did, and I think it's a real step forward, that he actually begin an interaction for sharing appropriately." "He was asking nicely if he could have a piece of chocolate, but there was just that fatal moment of impulse where he saw it in front of him and he just snatched it and ran." "Did you snatch it out of her hand and pop it in your mouth?" "You tell me." "I want to know the truth." "Yeah." "Do you think you'd do that again?" "Chaim has actually come on quite a lot." "Six months ago, he would have just taken the chocolate and he wouldn't have actually confessed to it." "But now he's being more honest about it and he's also making reparations, which is both an acceptance of the fact he's done wrong, but also is a skill in itself." "Here you go." "Oh!" "Why?" "Why you draw a bunny?" "Because it's your favourite animal." "OK." "I've never had the opportunity to listen to the conversations of a group of children of this age group in such an intimate way and it actually has been a fantastic revelation." "We've witnessed first-hand as the children have discovered challenges of conflict..." "..and rejection... ..before developing the skills crucial to forming friendships." "They're beginning to recognise emotions that they have themselves and they're beginning to think about the emotional needs of the people around them." "You wanna try?" "I'm going to help you, yeah?" "The lessons these children are learning, they're tough lessons." "They can be hard to take, but they're lessons that are going to serve them really well in their later lives." "Life as an adult really isn't that different to life in the playground." "ALL:" "Yay!" "Did you have a good day?" "When I grow up, I want to be a policeman." "When I grow up, I want to be a chef." "When I grow up, I want babies." "I wanna be a fireman." "Boxer." "I don't wanna grow up!" "Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd"