"(crickets)" "(guitar music)" "(door slams)" "JT:" "Fuck you, man!" "Fuckin' bullshit." "Fuck the hell out of ya!" "Buncha fuckin' bullshit!" "Ladonna:" "What happened, JT?" "JT:" "Fuck off!" "Ladonna:" "JT!" "JT:" "I fuckin gave my heart to this place." "Fuckin' eat shit and die, goddamnit!" "I've been underappreciated - fuck you, bitch, what you lookin' at?" "Fuck you!" "Fuck you!" "Damn it to hell." "Ladonna:" "What happened?" "Calvin:" "I fired his ass." "Ladonna:" "What for?" "Darrell:" "Stealin' eggs from a salad bar." "Jesus Christ, JT, them frickin' eggs have been there for weeks." "JT:" "That's the way I like 'em, damn it." "Get off of me, boy." "Darrell:" "Good God." "What the hell ya gonna do?" "JT:" "Get me another damn job." "Darrell:" "You're right about that." "Hell, I reckon I can see if Harold needs somebody." "JT:" "That's a good idea, you think he does?" "Darrell:" "Might need somebody to drive a truck 'cause, hell, all he's got is a bunch of damn Mexicans at the site." "A lot of them can't drive." "Hell, they don't even have a license." "JT:" "Goddamn Mexicans." "Darrell:" "You know Harold swears by 'em." "Those sumbitches will work their asses off." "JT:" "That's what I'm sayin, man, they come up here " "Darrell:" "What the hell are you gonna tell Tammy?" "JT:" "Shit." "Darrell:" "You ever think about getting your job back at Cigarette World?" "JT:" "Hell yeah, I do, everybody wants to work there." "Darrell:" "How come you got fired from there?" "Were you stealing cigarettes or somethin'?" "JT:" "Hell no, man." "Hell, they fired me because they blamed me for settin the damn place on fire." "Hell, they put the damn thing out." "Darrell:" "What the hell you gonna tell, Tammy?" "JT:" "Shit, man, she's on my damn ass about Ladonna anyway now." "Darrell:" "I tell ya somethin." "You tell Tammy about this," "Ladonna's the last of your worries, bubba." "You're gonna be asking for trouble," "I mean, asking for it." "She's gonna whoop your ass." "JT:" "Ain't the first time." "Hell, she's gonna know, man!" "I gotta be at work tomorrow or she's gonna be all in my damn business." "Darrell:" "Shit, JT, all you got to do, you get up at noon, you go to work just like you always do." "Ain't no reason in hell she's gotta know where you're really goin." "JT:" "Well, where in the hell am I goin?" "Darrell:" "Jesus, JT, you go anywhere you frickin well want to!" "Go to the beach, go to a bar!" "Just don't go home." "JT:" "Yeah?" "Darrell:" "Hell yeah." "JT:" "Hell fuckin yeah." "I guess." "Darrell:" "Simple." "JT:" "Don't you tell Sheryl." "Darrell:" "Do I look stupid?" "JT:" "Goddamnit, don't you tell Sheryl." "Darrell:" "Kiss my ass." "What you gonna do for the Fourth?" "JT:" "Celebrate my fuckin independence." "Darrell:" "Well, Bubba, the rate you're goin, you just might get it." "JT:" "I'm gone." "Darrell:" "See ya, brotha." "(waves crashing)" "(engine trying to turn over)" "JT:" "Sonuvabitch, motherfucker!" "(engine trying to turn over)" "JT:" "Fuck this, sonuvabitch motherfuckin damn!" "Tammy:" "Stealing eggs from the salad bar." "Hell no, he didn't tell me, he ain't been home yet." "You believe those liars?" "That's what he always says, "I was with Darrell."" "Wait" " I don't know where Darrell is, but he ain't with JT 'cause JT's with that little whore from the steakhouse." "Mm hmm, Ladonna." "(laughs) Uh huh, whore." "I know." "Hold on, I gotta go in and get it." "Hold on a second, okay?" "Let me get my shit together." "Hold on, (grunts), okay." "JT:" "Shit." "Darrell:" "Hasta luego." "JT:" "I'll see you, man, thank you." "(car engine fades away)" "(door closes)" "Tammy:" "Where you been?" "JT:" "How're you?" "Tammy:" "Okay." "JT:" "Uh, shit, what'd you do today?" "JT:" "Want a beer?" "Tammy:" "Yeah." "Where ya been?" "JT:" "Workin." "Hell, Tammy, I been workin, shit." "What's wrong with you?" "Tammy:" "You lie, JT." "JT:" "Whatchu mean?" "Tammy:" "You lie." "You were with that trash from the steakhouse." "JT:" "Tammy, please, shit." "Tammy:" "JT, I know you been seeing that whore." "JT: (laughs) You're crazy." "Hell, I was just with Darrell!" "Tammy:" "I thought you was workin." "JT:" "I was, I was workin, then I was dropped off by Darrell." "Tammy:" "Uh huh, I know you been with her." "JT:" "My goddamn car broke down, shit!" "Tammy:" "So now it's about the fuckin car?" "JT:" "Shit, damn, hell!" "What's your problem?" "I can't win with you!" "What's wrong with you?" "Tammy:" "We saw you last weekend, JT." "We saw you comin out of the dunes." "JT:" "Un-uh." "Tammy:" "Uh huh." "JT:" "Un-uh." "Tammy:" "Uh huh." "JT:" "I wasn't comin out of no damn dunes." "Tammy:" "We went back there and saw your Larks scattered all over the dunes." "JT:" "I don't smoke no damn Larks no more." "Tammy:" "You don't smoke no damn Larks?" "JT:" "No, I smoke Pastorals." "Tammy:" "We found the condom, JT." "JT:" "That wasn't my condom!" "I didn't wear a goddamn condom, Tammy." "Oh, fuck!" "Goddamnit, Tammy." "What are you following me around for, huh?" "Tammy:" "JT, shit." "JT Broadrick." "JT:" "Oh, Tammy." "You act like you can't trust me." "Tammy:" "How can you run around with that trash, and look me in the eye, and lie?" "And now you ain't even got no job." "JT:" "What the hell you talkin about?" "Tammy:" "I mean, you just got fired from the steakhouse." "JT:" "The hell you say?" "Tammy:" "Aw, hell, JT, I know you got fired, shit." "JT:" "Fuckin Calvin, that manager, sonuvabitch bastard never damn liked my ass." "Jealous of my ass, I tell you right now he is." "Tammy:" "Well, what you gonna do now?" "JT:" "I'm gonna sue." "Tammy:" "You were stealing eggs, baby." "JT:" "So?" "Tammy:" "JT Broadrick!" "JT:" "I can get me another damn job." "Darrell's already looking for me one right now." "Tammy:" "Nobody's gonna hire you, JT." "You've been fired three times since Christmas." "JT:" "Why you think you're so damn perfect?" "You're like I gotta be so fuckin perfect." "Tammy:" "What?" "JT:" "Uh huh." "Tammy:" "No, no, I know that I'm not perfect, but I been at the Buylow five years and I ain't never been fired nowhere yet." "How many times you been fired, JT?" "JT:" "I ain't listening " "Tammy:" "You should." "JT:" "Hell no." "Hell with it, stick your ass up there and smoke some more menthols, and drink your damn six pack, goodbye." "Tammy:" "What you gonna do now, JT?" "JT:" "Gettin the hell away from you!" "Tammy:" "Jackass!" "(stomps)" "JT:" "And all she kept on sayin was," ""What you gonna do now, JT?" ""What you gonna do now?"" "Ladonna:" "What are you gonna do?" "JT:" "Damn, Ladonna, I don't know." "You're worse than she is." "(telephone rings)" "JT:" "Anyway," "I am tired of her always on my ass." "I mean, it ain't like we're married or nothing, you know?" "Ladonna:" "She acts like you are." "JT:" "She's gonna be mad now though." "(telephone rings)" "I ain't never stayed out all night on her." "Not a whole lot anyway." "Ladonna:" "I bet I can get your job back for you, JT." "JT: (chuckles) I wouldn't go back." "How?" "Ladonna:" "I'll talk to Calvin." "JT:" "Shit, that ain't gonna do a damn thing." "Ladonna:" "JT, I'll talk to him." "JT: (groans)" "Ladonna:" "So what are you gonna do now?" "JT:" "Ladonna, I just lost my job." "What the hell you think I'm gonna do?" "(birds chirping)" "Darrell:" "Yeah, no, ain't no problem, man." "All right, sure, all right, appreciate it, all right, bye." "JT:" "What'd he say?" "Darrell:" "Sorry, JT, Harold turned you down, man." "JT:" "What the hell, man, how come?" "Darrell:" "You got to have a valid driver's license." "JT:" "Damn, man, a regular damn driver's license ain't good enough?" "Darrell:" "No, dumbass, your DUI." "JT:" "Shit." "Darrell:" "What you gonna do now, JT?" "JT:" "I don't know, man." "(sighs) Tammy already knows" "I ain't got a damn job." "Darrell:" "What?" "How in the hell she find out?" "JT:" "She just knew, man." "It's like she's got this damn fifth sense or something, you know?" "You tell Sheryl?" "Darrell:" "Shit no, hell no, man!" "JT:" "Darrell!" "Darrell:" "Hell no, not me, hell no." "JT:" "Anyway, I'm tired of her bitching me out all the damn time." "I spent the night at Ladonna's house last night." "Darrell:" "Damn, I bet she's mad as a crab." "Tammy gonna knock your teeth out." "JT:" "Shit." "Darrell:" "Tammy gonna whoop your ass is what she gonna do." "JT:" "I can run fast." "Tammy:" "It's that damn whore." "Sheryl:" "Skinny bitch." "Tammy:" "She can have his sorry ass." "I thought he'd grow out of it, staying out all night, drinking, stealing eggs." "Customer:" "Pff!" "Tammy:" "Like some kind of teenager." "Sheryl:" "Well, hello, knock knock, you got yourself a wild one." "Tammy:" "I know I got myself a wild one." "Barely damn house broke." "But he needs me." "Sheryl:" "Whatever." "Tammy:" "Whatever?" "Oh, credit or debit, sir?" "JT:" "Thanks, man." "Bartender:" "Appreciate it." "Jimmy:" "JT?" "(laughs)" "Darrell:" "Aw shit, here comes Jimmy." "Jimmy:" "Jay, Jay, Jay, Jay, Jay, Jay, Jay," "Tee, Tee, Tee, Tee, Tee, Tee, my man." "JT:" "Good to see ya." "I'm all right, I'm all right." "Jimmy:" "What are you doin, you drinkin?" "JT:" "Hell yeah, I'm drinkin, man." "Jimmy:" "Yeah?" "JT:" "Just got fired from the fuckin steakhouse." "Jimmy:" "Aw shit, man, what for?" "Hey, man, you didn't burn the place down?" "JT:" "No, man, bunch of assholes, that's all." "Jimmy:" "So what you gonna do now, JT?" "JT:" "Shit, man, I gotta get me another damn job." "Jimmy:" "Aw man, don't fuckin do that." "Thank you, sir." "Don't get a job, man." "Am I right?" "Get the fuckin unemployment." "JT:" "Man, unemployment don't pay shit." "My damn car just broke down." "It's gonna cost about 500 dollars to get the sumbitch fixed." "Jimmy:" "Fuck, man, just take my van." "JT:" "Your van?" "Jimmy:" "Shit, yeah, you can." "Hey, man, you was the only one who came and visited me in prison." "Don't think I forgot that shit, man." "It's the least I can do, man, go on, take it." "JT:" "I appreciate that, Jimmy, I do." "Jimmy:" "Well, then go the hell on, man, take the damn keys right now." "JT:" "How you gonna get around?" "Jimmy:" "Oh, I get around, man." "Don't you worry about Jimmy Bobo." "I get around." "JT:" "Damn straight of ya, buddy, appreciate it." "Jimmy:" "Do not mention it again, all right?" "There it is, done." "Fuck the car, fuck the job, have a beer." "Darrell:" "I'll drink to that." "JT:" "Well, appreciate the damn keys, man." "But I ain't got a goddamn job." "Jimmy: (groans)" "JT:" "Tammy wants some damn income comin in " "Jimmy:" "Fuck Tammy, man." "Fuck Tammy, man!" "Fuck her!" "Seriously, fuck her." "JT:" "I mean, that ain't it." "And I got damn Angel on my ass about Camry for child support." "Jimmy:" "Shit, man, how old is that kid now?" "JT:" "Camry?" "Hell, I don't know, man." "I reckon about five." "Jimmy:" "Five?" "And she still wants child support, man?" "JT:" "Got to, man." "Jimmy:" "Fuck, man, she is taking you for a ride, boss!" "JT:" "Yeah, but - they take your ass to jail for that shit." "I gotta get me a damn job." "Jimmy:" "What, now?" "JT:" "Actually I do." "Jimmy:" "Right now." "JT:" "Right now." "I got an appointment at the unemployment office." "Jimmy:" "Well, do yourself a favor and zip up your fly there, boss." "JT:" "I guess it is down." "See y'all, Darrell, I'm out!" "Jimmy:" "I tell ya, man, ain't no good ever come from no work!" "Brunette:" "James T. Broadrick, okay." "Do you go by James or Jim?" "JT:" "No, JT." "Brunette:" "JT?" "JT:" "JT's fine, yeah." "Brunette:" "Okay, well, you filled out all your paperwork all right, but you left this part blank." "JT:" "Oh shit, um, I didn't know what to put down there." "Brunette:" "In the skills part, okay." "Well, I tell you what, I'm just going to ask you some questions and you just tell me where you fit in." "All right, now, have you ever worked with computers?" "That's where all the action is." "JT:" "Shit, no." "Brunette:" "No, okay." "Um, let's see, how about technical work?" "HVAC, electrical?" "JT:" "Uh, no." "Brunette:" "Okay, um, construction, drywall, roofing?" "JT:" "Nah." "Brunette:" "No, okay, all right." "Um, (clears throat), automotive?" "Any skilled mechanical work?" "JT:" "Yes, ma'am." "Brunette:" "Oh, okay." "JT:" "Yeah, my car's a Legend and I just changed the filter in it so I can do that." "Brunette Oh, um, actually I meant have you ever worked on cars, you know, as a job?" "JT:" "Uhhhhh." "Brunette:" "I'm just gonna put that down as a no as well, okay." "Um, have you ever thought about going back to school?" "Times are tight, but people always need skilled labor." "You could learn a trade or a craft." "JT:" "Hell no, baby, damn it, look here now " "I just want a job, that's it, all right?" "I just want a damn job, that's it." "Brunette:" "Okay, um, let's see." "It says here that your previous job was at a restaurant." "JT:" "Yeah, it was at a steakhouse." "Brunette:" "All right, and what did you do there?" "JT:" "I didn't do a damn thing there, I didn't do nothin." "It was that damn manager, he's an asshole." "Brunette:" "JT, JT." "A couple of things, um, a little less foul language and, um, also I meant what was your job?" "JT:" "Oh hell, I did all kinds of shit, I mean, really." "Brunette:" "Could you - could you be a little bit more specific?" "I don't really want to put" ""all kinds of shit" on your paperwork." "JT:" "If they needed me to fill the salad bar, I'd do that." "Brunette:" "Okay." "JT:" "And if they wanted me to clean the pots and pans, I did that too." "Brunette:" "Mm hmm." "JT:" "I made a beautiful salad bar, just assorted lettuces, and carrots, and onions, and tomatoes are all staggered everywhere, and the broccoli, and pickled beets, and goulash, and vinaigrette, and different kind of vegetables" "you can put on top in there, and the dessert bar, and the puddin bar." "Brunette:" "So the salad bar was your station so to say." "JT:" "Well, dessert bar too, assorted cakes, and cookies, and mints, gelatins, and whipped creams, and stuff like that." "It was real decorative, lots of greenery and shit around it." "Brunette:" "So you were sort of a jack of all trades." "JT:" "Oh yeah, that's me, jack of all trades." "But pretty much I just cleaned up and shit, you know." "Brunette:" "Just cleaned up and shit, okay." "You know what?" "Let's - let's start over, all right?" "What would you like to do, JT?" "I mean, you're still a young man." "You must have some sort of career goals or some idea of what you'd like to do with the rest of your life?" "I mean, is there something that you've always really, really wanted to do but maybe you never had the opportunity?" "JT:" "I always wanted to be a cop." "Brunette:" "Good, great, okay." "Now see, we have all kinds of programs for people interested in law enforcement." "Now the city has a program and the county." "And what kind of police work are you lookin for?" "JT:" "Oh shit, man, I don't know." "I just always liked the idea of wearing the damn uniform, carrying around a gun, you know, scare the shit out of people, stuff like that." "Brunette:" "Okay, that's not really technically what they do but okay." "I'm gonna put you down as maybe an entry level type program." "JT:" "Hey, man, that's fine." "Brunette:" "You know, hopefully somethin where you are not carrying a weapon." "All right - oh, did you get your diploma?" "JT:" "I didn't get it." "Brunette:" "Okay, well, you're probably gonna have to get your equivalency." "JT: (whispering) I gotta get shots?" "Brunette:" "JT, I just have one more question." "Have you ever been arrested?" "JT:" "Not yet." "Brunette:" "Really?" "Well, all right, okay." "JT:" "Unless you count DUls, but y'all don't count that so it don't matter anyway." "Y'all don't count that, do you?" "(scratching of pen on paper)" "Brunette:" "You know what, JT?" "This has been real, real informative and I am going to just take your paperwork and put it in my file and I will be in touch, okay?" "So we are all done." "(gentle music)" "(door closes)" "(waves crashing)" "Ladonna's Voiceover:" "What are you gonna do now?" "Darrell's Voiceover:" "What the hell you gonna do now, JT?" "Tammy's Voiceover:" "What you gonna do now?" "JT:" "Shit." "(fireworks exploding)" "(crunching)" "(gentle music)" "(crunching)" "(car tires spinning on gravel)" "(crickets)" "JT:" "Lord, man, I ain't no saint and I don't deserve no special favors." "But you know I don't ask for much." "Hell, man, fact is, I pretty much keep my damn mouth shut" "but I'm having me a bad streak here and I could use a break." "So if you're handing 'em out, you might want to think about your boy, JT." "And I know you work in mysterious ways and all that shit, but hell, man, maybe you might want to cut me some fuckin slack." "All right, damn it." "Amen." "Weird Voice:" "Who you talkin to, JT?" "You talkin to me, JT?" "You're going to " "Jimmy:" "Hell, JT (laughs)!" "JT:" "What the hell you doin in the back of your damn van?" "Jimmy:" "What the hell am I doin in my van?" "Whatever the fuck I want, man." "I didn't know you was a praying sumbitch." "JT:" "That ain't funny." "Jimmy:" "Hey, man, where you stayin tonight, huh?" "JT:" "That's a damn good question." "I don't know where I'm stayin at, boss." "Jimmy:" "Shit, man, why don't you stay at my place?" "JT:" "You serious?" "Jimmy:" "As a heart attack, brother." "All you gots to do is drink with me." "JT:" "I reckon I can come over and do that." "(crickets)" "Jimmy:" "Ahhh!" "(burps)" "You know, it was fortuitous" "I was to run into you the other day." "JT: (laughs) Oh shit." "Jimmy:" "Mm hmm, because I am the answer to all your prayers." "JT:" "Shit, shit, shit. (laughs)" "Jimmy:" "I'm serious, man." "It's fuckin fate, man, 'cause I am your salvation, brother." "JT: (laughs)" "Jimmy:" "Right friggin here, baby." "JT:" "Shit, Jimmy, uh huh, man." "Jimmy:" "The Salvationator." "No, seriously, man." "You're ready to take shit into your own hands, ain't ya?" "JT:" "Yeah." "Jimmy:" "All right, well, then let's do that." "Let's take shit into our own hands." "Let's rob the steakhouse, man." "JT: (laughs) Yeah." "Jimmy:" "Oh yeah." "JT:" "Mm." "Jimmy:" "Oh yeah." "JT:" "Stop while you ahead." "Jimmy:" "I'm serious, man, listen to me, man." "I mean, what's the biggest problem you got in your life right now, man?" "The biggest one?" "JT:" "The biggest one?" "Jimmy:" "Mm hmm." "JT:" "Shit, man, I don't know." "Damn, goddamn many." "Jimmy:" "You say you ain't got no fuckin money." "JT:" "Yeah." "Jimmy:" "That's what it all come down to, don't it?" "JT:" "Yeah, it does, I ain't got no damn money." "Jimmy:" "Yeah, right." "JT:" "Yeah." "Jimmy:" "How you gonna get money?" "JT:" "Shit, I don't know, man." "Shit, get off my ass, you're like Tammy, shit." "Jimmy:" "Plus that fuckin asshole." "Yeah, man, that asshole that fired you." "JT:" "Oh, fuck him." "Jimmy:" "I mean, we should get him back, man." "He treat you like fuckin dirt." "Let's kick his dick in the dirt, man." "Let's rob his fuckin steakhouse (laughs)." "JT:" "Shit, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy, Jimmy." "Jimmy:" "Hear me out, man, come on now." "JT:" "There ain't nothin to take from the damn steakhouse." "Jimmy:" "Oh, man, you ain't listening to me, brother, you ain't listening to me." "Where's the money in the steakhouse?" "JT: (laughs)" "Jimmy:" "Where is it?" "Hmm?" "JT:" "Jimmy, it ain't got but goddamn 100 dollars in the fuckin register and shit, everything else is in the safe so unless you got some fucking dynamite or something, you ain't gonna get inside of that." "Jimmy:" "No, man, where's the money in the steakhouse?" "JT:" "It's in the damn safe!" "Jimmy:" "Well, man, where is the money?" "JT:" "It's in the fuckin safe!" "Jimmy:" "Nah, man, the money's in the fuckin meat, man." "JT:" "The money's in the meat?" "Jimmy:" "The money's in the fuckin meat." "JT:" "The fuckin meat." "Jimmy:" "Mm hmm." "JT:" "What are you talkin about?" "What, did you eat the worm?" "Jimmy:" "No, man, all them steaks, you sell 'em." "I mean, I used to work at Hindleys, dude." "JT:" "You're gonna sell a bunch " "Jimmy:" "Shit, yeah." "They used to buy shit out of the back of old pickup trucks all the time," "I remember this one old boy " "Shit, yeah, they would, man, I know a dude, all right?" "JT:" "Oh shit." "Jimmy:" "I do." "JT:" "I don't know, what if we get caught?" "Jimmy:" "How we gonna get caught?" "JT:" "They know what I look like." "Jimmy:" "Shit, man, we wear disguises or some shit." "Masks or somethin." "We go in there late one night, make it look like a robbery." "JT:" "It is a fuckin robbery." "Jimmy:" "Well, fuck yeah, it is, man." "And how many steaks they got?" "JT:" "I don't know, man." "Jimmy:" "Ballpark, in there right now, today." "JT:" "Shit, man, I don't know." "They got a fuckin damn freezer." "They get it every couple days." "I don't know, it comes out about 500." "Jimmy:" "Five, 500 steaks, man, shit." "What is that, five bucks a piece wholesale?" "JT:" "Mm hmm." "Jimmy:" "Shit, five times 500, what is that?" "Huh?" "What is that?" "That's a shit ton of money, that's what that is right there." "That is a shit ton of money, man." "Ya split it between me and you, Jason and Lonnie." "JT:" "Jason and Lonnie?" "Jimmy:" "Yeah, shit, yeah, man." "JT:" "No, no, no, no, no, no." "Jimmy:" "We gotta have a crew." "JT:" "I ain't bringing no   damn Jason, that boy ain't right." "He ain't all there, that boy is retarded." "Jimmy:" "We gotta have a fuckin lookout." "We gotta have somebody to drive the van, man." "I'm telling you, this ain't no fuckin bullshit, man." "We gotta do this shit professional, man." "JT: (laughing) It's just gonna be smooth as glass." "Jimmy:" "Fuck yeah, it is, man." "Come with me, man, tomorrow." "We just sit out in front of the steakhouse." "We see what there is to see, watching." "JT:" "I ain't sayin I'm gonna do that shit." "Jimmy:" "Oh, come on, brother." "Huh?" "Give me that cup." "JT:" "I really don't want anymore." "Jimmy:" "Give me that cup." "Ain't no harm in that, is there?" "Huh?" "JT:" "I guess not." "Jimmy:" "Oh shit." "Yeah, there ya go." "Yeah, you don't worry about a damn thing." "You just live it all to Jimmy Bobo." "(gentle music)" "Tammy:" "Oh, Tammy." "What ya gonna do now?" "(birds chirping)" "Sheryl:" "Two nights in a row?" "Tammy:" "Skinny little whore." "Sheryl:" "You need to get rid of that loser." "Customer:" "Hey, that's my chips there." "Tammy:" "After all I been to him." "Sheryl:" "What if I got you a date?" "Tammy:" "Huh?" "Sheryl:" "A date, what if I got you a date?" "Tammy:" "Hell, he don't take me on dates no more." "He takes that skinny whore." "Sheryl:" "What are you gonna do now?" "(angrily shaking merchandise)" "Customer:" "Oh, not my choco-snacks." "Tammy:" "Cash, or credit, or debit?" "Customer:" "Oh yeah." "Sheryl:" "Turn it around." "Tammy:" "No, the other way." "Sheryl:" "The magnetic stripe, look at the picture." "Customer:" "Boom, boom, boom." "Tammy:" "I wrinkled it all up " "Customer:" "That's all right." "Hey, you know what?" "You're having a rough day." "Here are my digits and there you go." "And good day." "Sheryl:" "Tammy, you gotta hit that." "Tammy:" "Sheryl!" "Sheryl:" "What are ya gonna do now?" "Tammy:" "I'm gonna win him back." "Sheryl:" "Oh, why, Tammy?" "Tammy:" "I love him." "Sheryl:" "Why?" "Tammy:" "You can't help you who fall in love with." "But maybe if you try, you could stop from screwing it all to hell, right?" "Sheryl:" "No." "Tammy:" "Well, I think so." "(triumphant music)" "Tammy:" "Two, three." "Yes, I can." "Ugh, ugh!" "(keys jingle)" "Tebow:" "Hi-ya!" "JT:" "What's all this about, man?" "Darrell:" "Beats the shit outta me." "I was just told to get you over here for dinner." "(children screaming)" "JT:" "What the hell is that, man?" "Darrell:" "Hey, Tebow!" "Stop it, boy!" "Cool it!" "Tebow, stop it, boy!" "JT:" "How do you stand it?" "Darrell:" "Not a big deal, brother." "It's not a big deal, you just gotta keep em - ow, Tebow!" " just gotta keep em in line." "Sheryl:" "Can't I leave them alone with you for one second?" "And you forgot to get the charcoal and now I'm gonna have to fry those burgers." "Darrell:" "Hey, I was going to the store, I promise." "Sheryl: "I was gonna get it, I was gonna go."" "JT:" "How do you stand that?" "That's worse." "Darrell:" "Damn it, man - (doorbell rings)" "JT:" "Better get it." "Darrell:" "I'll see who's at the door." "(children screaming)" "Well, hey, Tammy, come on in." "Tammy:" "Hey, Darrell." "Darrell:" "How you doin?" "Tammy:" "Well, thank you, young man." "Darrell:" "Cold beer?" "Tammy:" "Something stronger?" "You can make me a screwdriver or somethin?" "Darrell:" "We can do that." "Sheryl's in the kitchen." "Tammy:" "Sher - Darrell:" "I believe you know JT, don't ya?" "Tammy:" "Hey, JT." "JT:" "How ya been?" "Tammy:" "Good, you?" "JT:" "Been good, you?" "Tammy:" "Good, you?" "JT:" "How ya been?" "Tammy:" "Good." "JT:" "Good." "Tammy:" "Good." "JT:" "Mm hmm." "Tammy:" "Mm hmm, okay." "So, um, where was you last night?" "JT:" "Oh, Tammy, come on now." "Tammy:" "No, really, I'm just curious." "JT:" "I was with Jimmy." "Tammy:" "Jimmy?" "Jimmy who?" "JT:" "Mm hmm." "JT:" "Jimmy Bobo." "Tammy:" "Jimmy Bobo." "JT:" "Yeah, we was back at his trailer, that was it." "Tammy:" "Oh my god, JT." "I can't believe you hangin out with Jimmy Bobo." "JT:" "Oh, Jimmy's all right." "Tammy:" "All right my butt, he's the devil." "You know he's been to prison." "JT:" "Tammy, you can't blame someone just for being in prison." "(whispering) You just don't like him 'cause he screwed your sister." "Tammy:" "He did not." "JT:" "Oh hell now, everybody knows" "Ashley did it with Jimmy Bobo." "Tammy:" "Well, that don't got nothin to do with nothin." "Jimmy Bobo's a no good loser, and he's gonna drag you down, and you're a fool if you let him." "JT:" "He's all right, Jimmy's a fine boy." "Tammy:" "That boy's the devil and he's gonna drag you down." "JT:" "What do you want from me?" "(whispering) Why are you always on my ass?" "Tammy:" "I ain't on your ass, JT." "JT: (whispering) Always, always on my ass." "Tammy:" "I'm trying to help you, JT." "JT:" "I don't need your help." "Tammy:" "But you do, JT, you do." "JT:" "I do not, I don't, I'm tellin ya, you just wait." "Tammy:" "Wait?" "JT:" "You just wait." "Tammy:" "Wait for what?" "JT:" "You'll see." "Tammy:" "What am I gonna see?" "JT:" "That's it, you'll see." "Tammy:" "Well, what am I waiting on?" "JT:" "I don't know." "Tammy:" "You ain't gonna explain it more than that?" "JT:" "I can't take anymore of this (opens door)." "Tammy:" "JT!" "JT:" "Nooo (closes door)." "Tammy:" "Sheryl." "Sheryl:" "Darrell, you can put back one of them burgers." "Tammy:" "Shit." "JT:" "I ain't said I was gonna do this, Jimmy." "Jimmy:" "Yeah, man, I know." "Just drink your beer and relax." "JT:" "It's fuckin hotter than hell balls out here." "Fuck, goddamnit, goddamnit." "It's so hot, fuck." "Jimmy:" "Goddamn, you is a wet fuckin mess, man, calm down." "JT:" "I ain't never done nothin like this before, nothin." "Jimmy:" "Yeah, shit, man." "Ain't nothin damn to it." "You just take it from old Jimmy Bobo." "JT:" "Ladonna?" "Goddamnit, shit, my ass." "Jimmy:" "Shit, man, sit your ass up." "She can't see you, man." "See that?" "That right there, that is professional grade, high performance resonated window film, man." "She can't see you." "So that's your little girl, huh?" "Nice, not bad." "JT:" "Yeah, she's all right, man." "Lot of fun too now, let me tell ya." "Jimmy:" "Hey, you ain't gots to tell me, man." "I got eyes, I can see that." "JT:" "Lot more fun than Tammy, that's for damn sure." "Jimmy:" "You mean to say that Tammy ain't a barrel of fuckin laughs?" "JT: (laughs) I mean, I love Tammy and all," "I do, all that shit, but she's just always on my ass." "I mean, always wanting me to get a damn job, wanting to tie me down." "Jimmy:" "Shit, she's into that?" "JT: (laughs through smoke)" "Jimmy:" "You let her do that?" "JT: (laughs) Tie me down, like keep me in a cage." "Jimmy:" "Oh." "JT:" "Oh." "Jimmy:" "Well, that ain't gonna damn work." "JT:" "No." "Jimmy:" "You is a free bird, man." "JT:" "Damn straight." "Jimmy:" "You're just like me, man, just a free bird." "JT:" "And this bird you cannot change." "That's right, man, I am a free damn bird." "Ladonna and I, we have so much damn fun together, I'm telling you." "She's just crazy about me." "Jimmy:" "So she loves you." "JT:" "Damn straight she does." "She's crazy, man, she loves me." "Jimmy:" "Well, then who the fuck is that?" "Oo, son, she's a two timer." "Oh shit." "(laughing) Oh shit." "Look at her go!" "JT:" "I'm gonna kill that fuckin sonuvabitch!" "Jimmy:" "Whoa, man, calm down, man!" "JT:" "Get the fuck" " I'll kill that sonuvabitch!" "Jimmy:" "You're gonna screw up this whole fuckin thing, man!" "JT:" "I'm gonna kill that - Jimmy:" "Calm down, man!" "JT:" "Get off me, get off me!" "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up!" "JT:" "You shut the fuck up!" "Jimmy:" "Calm down, man." "You trying to get your ass kicked?" "That's what's gonna happen." "Listen to me, listen to me." "Listen to me!" "You're gonna get your ass kicked." "He's gonna fuckin swear out a warrant on you and then you're gonna be in the shit, man!" "Listen to me, I know what I'm talking about!" "You wanna kick his ass?" "Let's kick his ass but be fuckin smart, man, use your damn head." "What's gonna fuck with him more?" "Him comin in to work one morning and there ain't no fuckin meat (laughs)?" "He's gonna be up shit fuckin creek, brother (laughs)." "We'll kick his ass." "JT:" "Who the fuck is that?" "Jimmy:" "We'll kick his ass." "We'll rob that fuckin steakhouse." "JT:" "What the fuck is she doin?" "Jimmy:" "Come on, man." "JT:" "What the fuck is she doin?" "Jimmy:" "And that little fuckin two timing twat, she's gonna come runnin on back to you, right?" "You just leave it all to Jimmy Bobo." "JT:" "Shit." "Jimmy:" "I know it hurts." "Bitches is like that." "Goddamn, she's all the way down that " "Sorry!" "JT:" "Oh man, what the fuck is she doin?" "Jimmy:" "Looks like she's a free bird too." "Drink your beer." "(engine starts)" "(road noise)" "(guitar music)" "JT:" "Yes, sir." "Clerk:" "Right." "JT:" "I need four ski masks." "Clerk:" "Four what?" "JT:" "Uh, ski masks, yes, sir, y'all got any?" "Deputy:" "Ski masks?" "JT:" "Yes, sir." "Deputy:" "You want four ski masks?" "JT:" "Yes, sir, that's correct." "Deputy:" "They got snorkeling masks over there, but I ain't never seen nobody ski in those." "JT:" "Yes, sir." "(playful guitar music)" "(crickets)" "Jimmy:" "Now we's all in this together." "One for all and all for one." "Jason:" "Hell yeah." "Jimmy:" "So when we get into the steakhouse," "JT's says there ain't but one old dude in there and he ain't gonna put up no kinda fight as long as we show them we mean business." "Jason:" "Hell yeah!" "Jimmy:" "And there ain't no I in team, but there is in team captain and I'm the captain so when I say jump!" "Shit, ya'll shoulda already jumped by now." "Jason:" "Hell yeah!" "Jimmy:" "When I says move, y'all - y'all shoulda already been movin!" "Jason: (whooping and laughing)" "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up, Jason." "Jason: (Hollering)" "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up!" "Jason: (audibly playing the guitar)" "Jimmy:" "Jason!" "Shut the fuck up!" "What have you been smokin, man?" "Jason:" "Dope." "JT:" "Just tell 'em the plan, tell 'em the plan." "There's a secret knock and everything." "Tell 'em the damn plan." "Jimmy:" "Come on down here." "Now this is the steakhouse." "This is us in the van." "Jason:" "Yeehaw!" "(hurried orchestral music)" "Jason:" "Time to rock and roll, yeehaw!" "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up!" "(knocking in sequence)" "JT:" "All right, that's the secret knock, okay?" "(knocking in sequence)" "(knocking in sequence)" "Jason:" "Bang on the fuckin door, man!" "Jimmy:" "Open this goddamn door!" "JT:" "Try the front, go, go, go, go, go." "(knocking in sequence)" "JT:" "All right, fuck it." "Stay, just stay, stay there." "Jimmy:" "Goddamn motherfucking bullshit!" "Goddamn, open the goddamn door, motherfuckers, open it now!" "Fuckin - get, get down!" "Fuck, I almost fuckin blew you away, bitch." "JT:" "What's goin on?" "Jimmy:" "You tell me what the fuck is goin on?" "JT:" "I don't know!" "They don't lock all the fuckin doors until" "Jimmy:" "Closed on Sunday." "JT:" "Yep." "Jimmy:" "What's today?" "Is today fuckin Sunday?" "Goddamnit, man, are you fuckin shitting me?" "Wasn't even fuckin open today?" "JT:" "I forgot." "Jimmy:" "You forgot." "What the fuck is the matter with you, man?" "JT:" "I forgot." "Jimmy:" "Shit, shit, shit, shit!" "(crickets)" "(violin music)" "Jimmy:" "Look at you pathetic sacks." "You know, you fall on your ass, you get back up and try again." "Y'all remember the story about the Little Engine That Could, don't ya?" "Trying to get up to that deluxe apartment." "Lonnie:" "It was a fuckin train, man." "Jimmy:" "Watch your damn mouth, man." "I'm telling a fuckin Bible story." "Lonnie:" "Sorry, sorry." "Jimmy:" "That little train, he slid, but he reached that deluxe apartment in the sky, man." "That's what we gonna do tomorrow." "We gonna try, try again." "(knocking in sequence)" "Jason:" "I can't see shit." "Jimmy:" "Shit, I gotta piss." "Come on!" "(door opens)" "(shot gun racking)" "All right, old man, we's here for the meat." "(hum of the freezer)" "JT:" "Holy shit." "Jimmy:" "Oo (laughing)!" "JT:" "We hit the mother lode, man." "Jimmy:" "Take his ass to the dining room and tie him up." "Jason:" "Yeah, yeah." "Jimmy:" "Go on, go." "Jason:" "Don't get feisty, don't be a hero." "JT:" "They don't usually got this many!" "Jimmy:" "What did I say, man, what did I say?" "JT:" "You did it, Bobo, I'm sorry I doubted you!" "Jimmy:" "What'd I say?" "JT:" "Thanks, brother!" "Jason: (grunting and struggling)" "Jimmy and JT:" "Woohoo!" "Jason: (struggling)" "Jimmy and JT:" "Woohoo!" "Jason:" "What?" "Jimmy and JT:" "Woohoo!" "(all three men yelling joyously)" "JT:" "Oh shit." "We got some meat, boys!" "Jimmy:" "Don't fuckin touch my gun." "Jason:" "Sorry." "Jimmy:" "Let's pack some fuckin meat." "Jimmy:" "Oh sweet mother of " "Take it, boys!" "(all three men laughing and talking)" "Jimmy:" "Go get Lonnie, man!" "Jason:" "Ain't Lonnie supposed to stay in the van?" "Jimmy:" "Fuck that shit, man, fuck that shit." "Go get Lonnie, do what I say!" "Everybody movin meat!" "(groaning) Come on!" "You're like a " "Lonnie:" "I got it." "Jimmy:" "Move!" "Let's get this out to the van!" "JT:" "Here." "Jason:" "These are frozen." "JT: 'Course they're frozen." "Jason:" "What happens when they thaw?" "JT:" "That's when you eat 'em." "Load the damn meat, boy." "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up." "You sound like a bunch of little fuckin girl mice squeaking about their fuckin periods." "Now move some fuckin meat, man!" "We ain't got all fuckin night." "Jason:" "I do." "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up." "Move meat!" "You!" "Fuckin you!" "Wake the fuck up!" "Go check the register, goddamnit!" "JT:" "That's a good idea." "Jimmy:" "Man go fuck your entire self." "(playful guitar music)" "Jimmy:" "Move fuckin meat, motherfucker!" "Jason:" "I'm, I'm, I'm " "Jimmy:" "I'm, I'm, I'm!" "JT:" "Where's the key to the register?" "Jasper:" "In my pocket." "JT:" "Which one?" "Jasper: (chuckling) JT:" "Stop, stop it!" "Jimmy:" "Come on, what's the matter with you people?" "(cash register dings)" "Jimmy:" "Move!" "Jason: (laughing)" "JT:" "Thanks." "Jasper:" "Sure thing, JT." "JT:" "I got the cash, man." "Come on, let's get the hell outta here." "Jimmy:" "Hold on, man." "There's somethin I gotta do." "(bottles clinking)" "(knocking on the door)" "Woman's Voice:" "Jasper?" "Jasper?" "Jasper, (pounds on door), open the door!" "Jimmy:" "Shit, who is that?" "Jasper:" "That's just Peggy." "Jimmy:" "What does she want?" "Peggy:" "Hey, Jasper, open the door!" "Jasper:" "Wants me to open the door!" "Jimmy:" "No shit, Sherlock, what for?" "Hey, what for?" "Jasper:" "I guess she wants her Singapore Sling." "Peggy: (pounding on door) Jasper!" "Jimmy:" "Goddamnit!" "Where's the key?" "Jasper:" "Get outta my pocket." "Jimmy:" "Hey, hey!" "Jasper:" "Hey, hey, quit playin with me!" "(keys jingle)" "Jimmy:" "Sonuvabitch." "Hold it right there or I swear" "I'll blast a B hole right next to your A hole." "Come on, nice and slow, hands up, get in here." "Hands up, hands up, nice and slow." "JT:" "Who the fuck is that?" "Jason:" "Looks like a lounge chair." "JT:" "What in the fuck is that?" "Jimmy:" "Well, it's Peggy apparently." "Jason:" "She don't look Peggy." "Peggy:" "Any of y'all smoke full flavored?" "JT:" "Jimmy, what the hell we gonna do with her?" "Jimmy:" "Goddamnit, put her in a chair and tie her ass up, cowboy." "JT:" "What the fuck for?" "Jimmy:" "Because we can't have her calling the goddamn cops, can we, shithead?" "What the hell, man." "Tie her ass up already." "(pounding on door)" "Fuckin Grand Central fuckin Station, man." "Who the fuck is that?" "(imitating a woman) Who is it?" "Calvin:" "Calvin, open the damn door." "Jimmy:" "Who the fuck is Calvin?" "JT:" "He's the fuckin manager, man." "Jimmy:" "Oh shit!" "JT:" "He's gonna know it's me." "He's gonna know it's me, man." "Jimmy:" "All right, all right." "Well, go hide in the kitchen, Tinkerbell." "Tie her up fuckin already and put your goddamn hood on your face!" "Shit!" "(keys jingling)" "You wanna come in?" "Well, come on in, join the fuckin party." "(tango orchestral music)" "Calvin:" "Listen, buddy, just take whatever you want." "Just don't hurt us." "And whatever you do, don't push the red button by the cash register." "Dispatch:" "211F, silent alarm, 879 Lindhaven, Panama City Steakhouse." "Older Officer:" "Sounds like old Jasper tripped the alarm again." "Younger Officer: 1305, 911, we'll take it." "We're right around the corner." "(bottles clinking)" "JT:" "What the hell, man?" "Lonnie:" "JT, ain't we better be gettin a move on?" "JT:" "Damn straight, this ain't cool, man." "(car doors slam)" "(bottles clinking)" "Jimmy:" "Shit." "JT:" "What's takin you so long, this ain't cool!" "You're lollygagging your ass damn around." "Jimmy:" "This got a hell of a lot cooler, man (laughs)." "(knocks at the door)" "Older Officer:" "Hey, open up, police!" "Anyway, that's how we do things up north." "You crackers, you ain't got a clue how to do things right down here." "JT: (whispering) This ain't cool, man!" "Jimmy: [Unintelligible whispering], damn." "Jason:" "What's wrong?" "Jimmy:" "Shh!" "Cops!" "Older Officer:" "You know, I said to him," ""Look, what you need is more" ""people like me down here." ""Bring some more people like me" ""down here and you'd have a real force."" "Younger Officer:" "I think we better just knock again." "Older Officer:" "Yeah, all right." "(bangs on door) Hey, Jasper, is that you in there?" "Open up!" "Jimmy:" "Sorry, officers, door's broke." "Jason: (muffled laughter)" "Older Officer:" "The door's broken?" "Jimmy:" "Yeah, you'll have to go around." "That's right, the door's broke." "Older Officer:" "All right, we're goin around in front." "Jimmy:" "Woo ahh!" "Jason:" "Fuckin A motherfuckin meat!" "Jimmy:" "Yeah, we got the meat!" "JT: 143!" "Jason: 143, we got the meat!" "(hollering and celebrating)" "Jason:" "We got the meat!" "Jimmy:" "Woo!" "(hollering and celebrating)" "Did you see the damn look on that manager's face?" "Jason:" "Shit, man, how much meat you think we got?" "Jimmy:" "How much meat do you need, brother?" "Jason:" "So shit, man, what ya all goin do with your cut?" "Lonnie:" "You know, I think I'm gonna get some crockery." "Jimmy:" "What you gonna do with your cut, JT?" "JT:" "Man, I don't know." "I might just put it in the bank." "Lonnie:" "Maybe a day at the spa." "Jimmy:" "Put it in the bank?" "Man, what the fuck is the matter with you, man?" "There is a shit ton of meat out there, man, and a fifth of it is yours, brother." "JT:" "I ain't never had this much money before, Jimmy." "Jimmy:" "And don't thank me." "JT:" "I mean, Tammy always wanted to have enough to move out of the duplex, but that don't matter no damn more." "Jimmy:" "Screw Tammy, man, shit." "As soon as they shit can that fuckin asshole manager over there, that little steakhouse honey, she's gonna come runnin back to you, my man." "JT:" "Yeah, and I'm - fuck it, man." "If I'd listened to Tammy, my ass would've been on the unemployment line, shit." "Jimmy:" "Don't ever listen to no woman, man." "Don't ever listen to no skirt, dude." "As soon as they do, you might as well just hand 'em your dick, man." "Jimmy:" "Fuck, here comes my favorite woman right now, Crystal, dear." "Oh, a goddess, the water bringer." "I love ya, baby." "JT:" "A fifth?" "Jimmy:" "Yeah, huh?" "JT:" "You said a fifth of the meat is mine." "Jimmy:" "That is correct, one fifth." "JT:" "There's only four of us here." "Jimmy:" "Oo, huh?" "JT:" "There's only four - there's only four of us." "Why ain't I gettin a damn fourth, Jimmy?" "Jimmy:" "Well, shit, man, the man who done all the organizing, he get more than one share." "JT:" "You mean you, don't ya?" "Jimmy:" "Well, fuck yeah, man." "I mean, me, I did all the damn organizing!" "JT:" "Goddamn your ass, Jimmy." "I knew you'd pull some shit like this." "Jimmy:" "Hey!" "You wanna do the fuckin organizing?" "JT:" "Get off me." "Jimmy:" "You bitches would still be over there fuckin thumb in your asses (laughing)." "It's on, there ya go, grab me one of these, mm, woo hee, did we do some work today or what?" "Get this shit on, mm!" "Sheryl:" "See, he's funny?" "Tammy's Date:" "It's cool because I do deal in electricity a lot of times, you know." "The copper wiring is, you know, it's a really good conduit for electricity." "You know you've got different gauges and man oh man did I get into with this kind of uppity sales manager the other day." "He was trying to move this one unit and then we got down to this warehouse with units of 16 gauge and this is 12 gauge we were talking about 'cause I can get you a really good deal." "Sheryl:" "Tammy!" "Would you forget about that loser?" "What do you want with that?" "What do you want chopped liver for when you've got practically hamburger over here?" "Tammy:" "Well, I'll need more drinks then." "Tammy's Date:" "Everything all right?" "You need more drinks?" "Tammy:" "Yes, more drinks please." "Sheryl:" "Jager bombs!" "Tammy:" "Something fruity." "Sheryl:" "Drinks please!" "We need more drinks!" "Tammy:" "A lot more drinks, yes." "Sheryl:" "Jager bombs!" "Tammy's Date:" "Yeah, let's get some jager bombs." "Sheryl:" "Jager bombs!" "Tammy:" "Fruity, something fruity." "A brandy sour please with an umbrella." "Jason:" "Soy, tofu, gotta watch out for that shit." "Makes your tits grow." "Sheryl:" "We need four jager shots!" "Jimmy:" "I tell ya, Muslims, Roman Catholics, same lot as far as I'm concerned." "Tammy's Date:" "I mean, it's good for electricity." "It's not like copper tubing, you know, you find in plumbing." "Jimmy:" "You know, Martin Luther King, Junior shot himself." "Tammy's Date:" "Jager bomb!" "Tammy:" "You can have mine." "Let me have a strawberry daiquiri with an umbrella." "Tammy's Date:" "Do you like to boat?" "Darrell:" "Would I like to what?" "Jason:" "They sure don't make mayonnaise like they used to." "Jimmy:" "You ever eat a meat-cicle?" "Sheryl:" "Jager bomb!" "Tammy's Date:" "Can we have four?" "JT:" "Salut." "Jimmy:" "There ya go." "Tammy's Date:" "I told him, I just went right up to his face and I said" "Woman:" "Bye, have a good one." "Jimmy:" "I do have a good one, baby (slap)." "(laughter)" "Tammy's Date:" "That just sounds dandy, make it three." "JT:" "There's my baby." "Ladonna:" "How are you?" "Man at Table:" "Better now (laughs)." "Ladonna:" "We've missed you." "JT:" "What the fuck is she -?" "Ladonna, hey, hey!" "What the hell ya doin?" "Ladonna:" "Hey, JT." "JT:" "Yeah." "Ladonna:" "Hey, did you hear somebody robbed the steakhouse?" "JT:" "Oh hell no, shit, no, what the hell you talkin about, get off of it." "Why would anybody want to rob a steakhouse for?" "Ladonna:" "That's what I'm sayin." "Calvin just called." "The whole police is up there with him" "JT:" "Ugh." "Ladonna:" "I mean, what's he gonna do?" "He's gonna be up shit creek for sure." "JT:" "Yeah, I guess so." "What the hell you doin?" "Ladonna:" "Why do you care?" "Tammy's Date:" "Jager bombs!" "Sheryl:" "Jager bomb!" "I'm drunk." "Tammy:" "Can't take him anywhere." "I might be drunker." "Tammy's Date:" "You're drunk?" "You're drunk?" "You know what you need?" "You need a jager bomb." "Sheryl:" "You can have mine." "Tammy:" "You stay away from JT." "JT:" "Tammy, stay back [unintelligible]." "Tammy:" "Stay away from him." "JT:" "Don't point your finger, no, no, no, no, no." "Ladonna:" "Too late." "Tammy:" "Shut up, you little whore." "JT:" "That ain't nice, honey." "Ladonna:" "What'd you call me?" "JT:" "Don't get her started." "Tammy:" "Did I stutter?" "Whore!" "JT:" "Shut the fuck up." "Tammy:" "I'll kick the crap outta ya!" "I'll kick ya into next week!" "Jimmy:" "Ladies, please, show some class." "Tammy:" "You stay away from JT." "You ain't no good for him or no one else and I'm not gonna let you drag him down." "Jimmy:" "She's just upset 'cause I screwed her sister." "Tammy:" "You did not touch Ashley." "JT:" "Yeah, he did." "Jimmy:" "Yeah, I touched Ashley just about everywhere." "Tammy:" "You piece of crap, get over here!" "Jimmy: (laughing) So what you doin tonight, girlfriend?" "You are cute as a speckled pup rolled in flour." "JT:" "Sorry about that." "Ladonna:" "I'm not worried about it." "JT:" "You know Jimmy Bobo." "Jimmy:" "Pleasure." "Darrell:" "Damn, brother, what a night." "JT:" "Yeah, it was." "Darrell:" "Tell you what - how you doin?" "Ladonna:" "Good." "Darrell:" "Hear some sumbitch robbed the damn steakhouse tonight?" "JT:" "What the fuck you talkin about, Darrell?" "Darrell:" "They sure did." "JT:" "Huh, I hadn't heard that." "Ladonna:" "Yes, you did." "JT, I just told you." "Jimmy:" "Time to go, sorry, time to go!" "Let's get on outta here." "JT:" "Please and thank you, see you later, take care, hey, baby, I'll call you later." "Ladonna:" "Sorry about that." "Jimmy:" "We gots to go, Jose's a'waitin." "Tammy:" "What'd you do, JT?" "JT:" "What you talkin about?" "Tammy:" "What'd you do, JT?" "JT:" "What'd I do what?" "Tammy:" "I heard them talkin in the bar." "What did Jimmy get you into?" "JT:" "I don't know what the hell you talkin about, hon." "Tammy:" "You look guilty as hell." "Jimmy:" "Come on, JT, it's time to go." "JT:" "I'm done, girl, I'm going." "Tammy:" "You call me if you in trouble, JT." "JT:" "I'm fine." "Tammy:" "You call on me, JT!" "JT:" "I'm fine!" "Let's go!" "(car door slams)" "Tammy: (crying) Shit!" "Jason:" "Come here, how'd you get out, now?" "Jimmy:" "Jason, get in the fuckin van!" "Jason!" "Tammy: (loudly crying)" "Ladonna:" "Means that much to ya?" "Tammy: (blowing her nose loudly)" "Well, he's a real catch." "(loud nose blowing)" "Well, hell, if you and JT's " "I mean, if you and him's really " "Tammy:" "It ain't you, it's him." "Oh shit." "Ladonna:" "Cigarette?" "Tammy:" "No." "Ladonna:" "Listen, I know you got no reason to want to listen to me and you probably think I got no reason to be straight with you." "But if I was you, hell, I'd forget about JT." "Tammy:" "I can't." "Ladonna:" "I don't mean for good." "I just mean how's he ever gonna decide what he wants to do if you always tellin him?" "Tammy:" "I'm just tryin to help him and I'm just tryin " "Ladonna:" "I know what you want, but you gotta let him find it for hisself." "How about a cigarette now?" "Jimmy:" "Jason, get in the fuckin van." "(door closes)" "Jason:" "Man, I petted the shit outta that dog!" "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up, Jason." "(engine starts)" "(birds chirping and flies buzzing)" "(Spanish television program playing)" "JT:" "Shit, man." "Oh, fuck, what time is it?" "Jason:" "Hell yeah." "JT:" "Fuck, it's almost two goddamn thirty, ugh!" "Jimmy!" "Jimmy!" "Come on, man, we gotta get up, we gotta get up!" "Jimmy:" "Whoa, the hell we do." "JT:" "We gotta sell the meat, man!" "Jimmy:" "Shit, the meat." "Phew!" "JT:" "Goddamnit, Jimmy, they're defrostin!" "Jimmy:" "Well, we'll say they're fresh." "JT:" "Oh hell, shit!" "Jimmy:" "Fresh frozen." "It'll work, you just leave it all to Jimmy Bobo." "Okay, man, pull around the back." "You guys let me do all the talkin." "Pull up to that guy over there." "Hey, brother, you want some meat?" "Got a whole lot of meat in here for ya." "If you could take it all, we got four guys that'll pack it wherever you want it." "All day long." "Well, what the hell's the matter with him?" "Jason:" "I guess he don't need no meat." "JT:" "You said you knew someone, damn it." "Jimmy:" "I said I used to." "JT:" "What the hell we gonna do now?" "Jimmy:" "Ah, relax, man." "Hindleys ain't the only game in town." "Jason:" "Ask him, man, ask him!" "Jimmy:" "Say, dude, you want some meat?" "Tattooed Man:" "What?" "Jimmy:" "Well, me and the boys in here, we got a lot of meat for ya, know what I'm sayin?" "You interested?" "Tattooed Man:" "What the hell you sayin to me?" "Jimmy:" "I'm askin if you're interested in our meat." "Tattooed Man:" "Sure (chuckling)." "Jimmy:" "That's one big fag, man." "JT:" "Damn, Jimmy." "You said you knew we could sell the damn meat." "You got us running all over town with big giant faggots grabbing our asses!" "Jimmy:" "Well, I guess it just goes to show you never can tell." "JT:" "It ain't cool, man, it fuckin ain't cool." "What the hell we gonna do now, huh?" "Ain't no one gonna be open, nobody!" "The damn meat's a'meltin!" "Lonnie:" "So how come we didn't steal a nonperishable?" "Jimmy:" "You ask the damn stick figure, Jimmy Bobo." "(imitating Jimmy) "The money's in the meat, man, it's gonna be easy!"" "Shit!" "Jimmy:" "Well, hell, man, did Bonnie and Clyde give up the first robbery they had?" "It didn't go so well." "It didn't." "You know why?" "JT:" "Oh Jesus." "Jimmy:" "You know why?" "Jason:" "I don't know." "Jimmy: 'Cause they loved each other." "So if there ain't no fuckin love in this van, man, just pull over, you can get out the goddamn - have an ice cream and get your fuckin asses happy or we can regroup, we can think up a new plan." "Maybe we should just rob a bank." "Jason:" "Hell yeah!" "JT:" "Hell no!" "Jimmy:" "Wow, put your panties back on, man, shit." "All the banks is closed up, it's too late anyhow." "But tonight we eat steak." "Jason:" "Woohoo, yeah!" "Jimmy:" "Tomorrow is a new day!" "Jason:" "Hell yeah, woo!" "Jimmy:" "Shut the fuck up, Jason." "(hurried orchestral music)" "(dog barking and panting)" "(dogs barking)" "(gun shot)" "Hunter:" "Dang, dog, where you goin?" "JT:" "Get outta here, get out!" "(claps)" "Let's go now, get outta here!" "(claps)" "Get outta here!" "(whistles and claps)" "Damn, man, they won't leave, shit." "They are cute though, ain't they?" "(whistles)" "Damn, Jimmy, you ain't gonna shoot 'em, are ya?" "Jimmy:" "No, I'm just gonna scare 'em a little bit." "(gun shot)" "Well, shit." "JT:" "What the fuck is " "Jimmy:" "What scares a dog?" "Lonnie:" "I don't know, a bigger dog?" "Jason: (barking like a dog) Woof!" "Woof!" "Hunter:" "That ain't right." "Jason:" "Woof!" "Hunter:" "Hello?" "Yeah, I'm out here on Highway 27." "There's a bunch of dogs out here and there's a guy barking at the dogs." "Yeah, the man is barking at the dogs." "(gun shot)" "They're firing shot guns too." "(phone beeps)" "Jimmy:" "Damn, man, they won't move!" "Jason:" "You guys figure this out." "I'm gonna get a snack." "(door slams)" "(hurried music)" "Jimmy:" "Shit!" "JT:" "What the hell we gonna do now?" "Jimmy:" "I don't know, man." "Maybe they just here for them dogs." "Officer:" "Officer requesting backup." "Car 21, I'm out Highway 27." "JT:" "They're gonna figure it out." "They're gonna figure it out when they see the damn meat." "Jimmy:" "Maybe they won't see the meat." "JT:" "They're gonna see blood drippin out of the back of the van, Jimmy." "Ain't no cop and police gonna see blood drippin out the back of a van, a whole shit ton of blood, and turn away and go home!" "Jimmy:" "You're a little bit smarter than I thought you were." "JT:" "Fuck!" "Officer:" "Go on, go!" "(police sirens)" "Jimmy:" "Shit!" "Shit!" "Shit!" "Shit!" "Shit!" "JT:" "What the hell you doin?" "Jimmy:" "What does it look like I'm doin?" "JT:" "No, no, no, no, no, hell no, man," "I never said I was gonna shoot a cop, no!" "Jimmy:" "What's the matter with you?" "You a fuckin pussy?" "JT:" "That ain't it, man, this ain't cool." "You don't wanna shoot a damn cop, Jimmy!" "Jimmy:" "Goddamn pussies!" "JT:" "That ain't cool!" "Jimmy:" "What, you wanna go to prison?" "(racking shot gun) I got somethin for ya, piggies." "JT:" "Oh shit." "Sergeant:" "All right, have a look." "Officer:" "Boys, we got somethin here." "JT: (dialing phone)" "(telephone rings)" "Tammy:" "JT?" "JT:" "Hey, Tammy." "Hey, Tammy, hey, uh, I been thinkin " "(gun shot)" "Tammy:" "JT, what was that?" "JT:" "Shit, that's" " I ain't hear nothin." "(shot gun)" "Jimmy:" "I ain't goin back to fuckin jail!" "Tammy:" "That don't sound like nothin, JT." "JT:" "Oh hell, that's just - that's Jimmy, Tammy." "Tammy:" "What the hell's he doin?" "JT:" "Oh hell, you know Jimmy." "He's just messin around." "Hell, he lives in his own world anyway, you know?" "(two gun shots)" "Officer: (on bullhorn) This is the police." "We know that you are armed." "Tammy:" "Aw, hell, JT." "Officer:" "If you do as we say, no harm will come to you." "JT:" "Look, you love that fella or what?" "Tammy:" "You done stole that meat." "JT:" "That ain't no answer!" "Tammy:" "This ain't about me, JT!" "Now where you at?" "JT:" "I'm at Jimmy's." "Tammy:" "How many police is there?" "JT:" "I don't know." "There's a few." "Tammy:" "You done robbed the steakhouse." "JT:" "It wasn't my idea!" "Tammy:" "I told you Jimmy was no good." "JT:" "I been thinkin, all right, I been thinkin, and, uh, I been thinkin and I might be a little too late." "Officer: (on bullhorn) At this time place your weapons outside the double wide." "JT:" "Maybe you was right." "(gun shot)" "Jimmy:" "Fuck you!" "Tammy:" "Well, what you gonna do now, JT?" "JT:" "I don't know, hell, I don't know." "I don't know what the hell I'm gonna do." "It's just that, uh, oh hell, I think I screwed up a little this time and well, I mean, I think that, uh, shit." "Tammy:" "Yeah?" "JT:" "I mean, well, what I think " "Tammy:" "Yeah." "JT:" "What I want and what I think is" "I think I wish you was here." "Tammy:" "Really." "JT:" "Mm hmm." "Tammy:" "You don't wish your little tramp was there?" "JT:" "Mm-mmm." "Tammy:" "No?" "JT:" "Mm-mmm." "Tammy:" "Okay." "You just hold on, JT, I'm comin." "Don't do nothin stupid, nothin else." "I mean, don't do nothin." "Don't do nothin at all until I get there." "Now how do I get there?" "JT:" "Oh hell, baby, it's at Jimmy's, uh - oh hell, just follow the sirens." "Tammy:" "Follow the sirens?" "JT:" "Mm hmm." "Tammy;" "Shit." "Jimmy:" "I ain't goin back to fuckin jail!" "(racks shot gun)" "(gun shot)" "(bouncy suspenseful music)" "Jimmy:" "Come on, man!" "Come on, take off that skirt and get the fuck out here and help us, man!" "JT:" "Jimmy, this is crazy, man." "They got us fuckin surrounded here." "Jimmy:" "Bullshit." "All we gotta do, we gotta get out to the van, man, Lonnie here, he used to drive dirt track." "JT:" "Shit." "Tammy:" "Come on, baby, I'm comin, hold on." "Commander:" "I guess I'll bring SWAT in, gas 'em." "01." "Dispatch: 01, go ahead." "Commander: 01, start SWAT to our location." "Tammy:" "Come on, grandpa, move!" "(beeps horn)" "Get outta my way, get outta my way, get outta my way!" "Stay in your lane!" "Fucker!" "JT:" "You're screwin us, you're fuckin screwing us, man!" "Jimmy:" "Aw, man, be a man for once in your fuckin life." "JT:" "Like him?" "You're screwin us, man!" "What the fuck, they've got us surrounded." "Jimmy:" "I ain't goin back to fuckin jail." "I ain't goin back to fuckin jail!" "Not for you and not for fuckin anybody!" "JT:" "Fuck you!" "Jimmy:" "So fuckin man up or put in a fuckin tampon and go fuckin crawl out to them and see what kind of fuckin mercy they got for ya." "Put you in a fuckin cage, boss, that's what they'll fuckin do." "Jason:" "Lonnie, you used to race dirt track?" "Jimmy:" "He was pretty good too." "Tammy:" "What are y'all doin?" "Sorry!" "Are you fuckin kiddin me?" "Ahh!" "Oh no, no, come on." "Shit, shit, shit, shit!" "Oh my god." "(engine dies)" "No." "Officer:" "Screw SWAT, let's charge 'em." "Commander:" "No, no, no, wait for SWAT." "Officer:" "Blast 'em out." "Let's set this place on fire!" "Tammy:" "I'm comin, baby!" "Ahh!" "JT:" "Come on, man, we're surrounded here." "What are we gonna do?" "Jimmy:" "I know what I'm doin." "What you gonna do, pussy?" "(fast violin music)" "Tammy:" "I'm his girl, I'm JT's girl!" "I can talk him out!" "Let me in, I can " "Commander:" "Hey, what are you doin?" "Tammy:" "I'm JT's girl." "You give me five minutes, I can talk him outta there." "Commander:" "Who's JT?" "Is he in there?" "Tammy:" "He called me on the cell phone." "Now let me talk him out." "Commander:" "He's gonna shoot you is what he's gonna do." "Tammy:" "Nobody's gonna shoot me." "Commander:" "There armed men in there " "Tammy:" "I know all those boys." "Nobody is gonna shoot me." "JT:" "You damn idiot!" "You're fuckin screwing us!" "Jimmy:" "Leave it all to Jimmy Bobo." "JT:" "I've left it with Jimmy Bobo!" "This is where the fuck we're at now!" "Jimmy:" "Well, I'll get us out, I got us in." "Fuckin have some damn trust, man." "Tammy:" "You give me five minutes you'll have your men." "Commander:" "Promise me?" "Tammy:" "Promise." "Commander:" "You have five minutes." "Hold your fire!" "Hold your fire!" "Hold your fire!" "I'm sendin Tammy in, JT." "She got somethin to say to you." "Dumbass." "SWAT:" "What the hell was that?" "Commander:" "The girl of one of the perps." "Said she can talk 'em out." "SWAT:" "So now they have a hostage." "Commander:" "Let's see you try and stop her." "(door closes)" "Tammy:" "Whoa!" "Jimmy:" "Hello, darling!" "Tammy:" "Darling, my butt, Jimmy Bobo." "Get that thing outta my face." "Jimmy:" "Where's your sister?" "Tammy:" "Nowhere, she's never gonna want to see you again, cockroach." "JT:" "Hey." "Tammy:" "Hey." "What you gonna do now, JT?" "(drops bag on floor)" "JT:" "I don't know." "I can't make nothin work." "Why can't I make nothin right?" "Tammy: (whispers) I don't know, baby." "JT:" "How come nothin works for me?" "How come every I do just turns to shit?" "Tammy:" "I'm sorry, baby." "JT:" "It ain't cool." "Tammy:" "No." "JT: (sighs) Like I'm some kind of loser or somethin." "Tammy:" "Sorry, JT." "JT:" "Can't do nothin." "Can't do nothin." "Tammy:" "No, you ain't gotta do nothin." "All you gotta do is let me love you." "JT:" "Shit, Tammy, shit." "Tammy:" "You ain't gotta do nothin else." "JT: "Lettin' you love me" ain't gonna stop them cops from comin in here and shootin my ass." "Tammy:" "Well, you done stole that meat." "JT:" "I did, yes." "Tammy:" "The cops got you surrounded." "JT:" "Jimmy says that there's a van " "Tammy:" "Oh, no, no, no." "JT:" "That we can get out of here." "Tammy:" "Jimmy says." "JT:" "Yeah." "Well, what do you think I ought to do?" "Tammy:" "What do you think you ought to do?" "JT:" "I don't wanna go to jail, Tammy." "Tammy:" "This is a big one, JT." "You're a free bird." "You do what you think you oughta do." "JT:" "What kinda damn answer is that?" "Tammy:" "But don't forget I love you." "I'll be damned if I know why, but I love you and I'll still love you even if you come out of this alive." "JT: (sighs)" "(bangs on door)" "Tammy:" "Aw, hell, put your damn guns down." "Commander:" "What did they say?" "Tammy:" "They said give 'em a minute." "SWAT:" "Listen, sooner or later, we're gonna have to send in the tear gas." "Tammy:" "Give 'em a damn minute." "Jimmy:" "Time to get up, Margaret." "JT:" "What the fuck do you not get about this?" "We are fuckin surrounded back there!" "Jimmy:" "First time I met you, man," "I knew you was a big fat fuckin pussy." "Commander:" "All right, boys, let's be smart." "Come out of the trailer one at a time with your hands in the air." "JT:" "We gotta do what they say, man." "Jimmy: (laughs) Like hell we do." "JT:" "They've got us surrounded, Jimmy." "Jimmy:" "You goddamn pussy, that's all you are." "JT:" "That's right, I am a pussy." "Call me a pussy." "Jimmy:" "Where you goin?" "The fuck you goin?" "JT:" "I'm a pussy?" "Damn right, I'm a pussy, Jimmy, damn fuckin right." "Jimmy:" "Pussy." "JT:" "That's it, say it louder." "Jimmy:" "Pussy!" "JT:" "Say it like you mean it!" "Jimmy:" "Pussy!" "Hey, don't shoot!" "Don't shoot the pussy!" "Commander:" "Stop right there, turn around, put your hands on your head and interlock your fingers." "Slowly walk down the steps." "Or that." "Follow the sound of my voice, walk backwards towards me." "Keep comin, keep comin." "Stop, slowly get down on your knees, carefully get down on your knees, okay." "You're doin good, JT, you're doin the right thing." "JT: (groaning)" "Tammy:" "The other ones said they're gonna fight to the death." "They had kinda crazy in their eyes." "I think you should get 'em, get 'em, get 'em." "SWAT:" "Tear gas, lock and load, lock and load." "(tear gas deployed and windows breaking)" "Multiple Officers:" "Police, get down on the ground!" "JT's Voiceover:" "Well, I made my decision." "Jimmy, and Jason, and Lonnie, they made theirs." "Parole Board Member:" "So what happened to them, JT?" "JT:" "Cops sent in tear gas and took 'em down pretty easy they said." "The judge was hard on 'em, I heard." "So I'm glad I did what I did." "Parole Board Member:" "What have you learned?" "JT:" "What have I learned?" "Parole Board Member:" "Yeah, what have you learned in the last 14 months?" "JT:" "Shit, man, I learned prison ain't cool." "Parole Board Member:" "Prison ain't cool." "JT:" "Hell no, it ain't cool, goddamnit." "I never want to come back here again." "Parole Board Member:" "Anything else?" "JT:" "Well, I used to think I was a free bird." "You know, free bird like the song." "Parole Board Member:" "Skynyrd?" "JT:" "Yeah." "And this bird, you cannot change." "Parole Board Member:" "This bird you cannot change." "JT:" "So you're thinking about it, really, I mean, who changes a bird?" "Besides, how are you supposed to be free if you cannot change?" "If you cannot change and you ain't free to change, hell, man, you ain't free." "Parole Board Member:" "So what you gonna do now, JT?" "(echoing) What are you gonna do now, JT?" "(echoing) What are you gonna do now, JT?" "What are you gonna do now, JT?" "To make yourself a better man." "JT:" "We're all men here, right?" "Y'all married?" "Parole Board Member:" "Oh yeah." "JT:" "Yeah?" "Well, I just figured that maybe if" "I settled down a little, then maybe" "I might just settle down, you know?" "With Tammy." "Hell, man, she always wants me to be like a normal fella, you know?" "Someone who ain't always doin kinda stupid shit, but I never would let her 'cause" "I always wanted to be free." "But if somebody loves you and you love her, then why the hell you want to be free?" "I mean, fact is, ain't no one a free bird." "Every bird's got a nest." "Parole Board Member:" "That's beautiful, JT." "JT:" "Damn straight, yes, sir." "(cell doors opening and closing)" "(door buzzer)" "(laughter)" "JT:" "Oh shit, all right." "Hey, baby." "Tammy:" "Hey, baby." "JT:" "Yeah?" "(Tammy squeals in excitement)" "Tammy:" "You're a free bird." "JT:" "Yes, I am, a free bird." "Both:" "For real!" "(laughter)" "JT:" "What's goin on here?" "Tammy:" "What is goin on here?" "JT:" "Woo!" "(laughs) Tammy:" "Woo!" "(laughs)" "JT:" "How about this now?" "Tammy:" "How about what now?" "JT:" "How about this now?" "Tammy:" "What are you talkin about?" "JT:" "Tammy?" "Tammy:" "What?" "JT:" "You got somethin you want to tell me, huh?" "Tammy:" "Are you saying what I think you're sayin?" "What do you mean?" "JT:" "I didn't mean nothin by it, I just thought " "Tammy: (whispers) You thought I was pregnant?" "Damn, JT, you're callin me fat?" "JT:" "I just thought that " "Tammy:" "Did you get out of prison just to call me fat?" "JT:" "Damn, hell, Tammy!" "Tammy:" "I shoulda left your ass in prison!" "JT:" "Well, shit, Tammy, I been locked up 14 months you're still on my ass, 14 damn months." "Tammy: 14 damn months." ""Welcome home, honey - you look like a house."" "JT:" "You bring me a glass of tea?" "Tammy:" "What?" "JT:" "In my damn favorite mason jar?" "Hell no!" "I been in there drinkin that saccharine-laden damn " "Tammy:" "There is no way to mistake a woman being pregnant." "JT:" "You ought to bring me a snack or somethin." "Tammy:" "A snack?" "What the hell you want, like some " "JT:" "I'm trying to turn over a new damn leaf here." "Tammy:" "Turn over a whole damn tree, that's what we're gonna do." "All right, all right." "JT:" "Open the door." "Tammy:" "Okay, shit!" "JT:" "Open the door!" "Tammy:" "It's open!" "JT:" "You always bring me a glass of tea." "Tammy:" "Well, I forgot, I'm sorry." "I got a whole jar of it at home." "Shit, I had other things on my mind other than making you tea." "Put your damn seat belt on." "Get out of prison and I'm gonna kill your ass on the way home." "JT:" "Just calm down." "Tammy:" "I am calm!" "You just called me fat!" "JT:" "I didn't - well, honey, shit," "I just figured that " "Tammy:" "What?" "JT:" "That we had a little somethin on the way there." "I just felt a bulge." "Tammy:" "Lord, I'm gonna stop at the liquor store, are you happy?" "JT:" "I don't want any more liquor." "I'm a new man, I want a glass of tea." "Tammy:" "I'll get you some damn tea when we get home." "JT:" "Five teabags " "Tammy:" "Are you seriously gonna argue with me about how I make my tea?" "You just got outta prison for 14 months." "Put your damn seat belt on." "JT:" "If you don't steep it all the damn properties and flavors don't come in." "Tammy: 14 months and you're still criticizing my ass, shit!" "(bouncy orchestral music)"