"Surprise!" "Thanks for helping this summer." "Have a great year at school, Paige." "Hey, what happened to the Lamborghini?" "I'm quite bored of the Lamborghini." "Ready to lose?" "I've won Grand Prix." "What have you won?" "Nothing." "And you're gonna beat me in your mummy's limo?" "To be correct, Mr. Irvine, I'm going to beat you in my mummy's limo, to which I've made numerous modifications." "So you should be afraid, my friend." "Not half as afraid as you're gonna be when your mummy finds out." " Hey, how was it?" " Oh, it was great." "They had a going-away Danish for me." "And as soon as I blew out the candle, Trey Carlson came in with this huge bloody gash on his forehead." " He tried to give himself a haircut." " Good going, Trey." "The cool part was they let me stitch it up for him." " Time check?" " 9:45." "Racers ready?" "Go." "Hi." "No!" "Look out!" "Hi." "Great dress." "Good race, Your Highness." "Not exactly the way I wanted to win." "It'd been better if you hadn't lifted your foot off at the end." " No, you did great." " Congratulations." " And then there were two." " It's not that bad." "No, they seem really happy." "I..." "I just remember how much we used to talk about getting out there and following our dreams." "There's a whole world out there to see." "You too." "We're the last holdouts." "Todd and I are engaged." " Don't hate me." " That's great." " Why would I hate you?" "No." " Oh, thanks." " OK, ladies." " Oh, look." "Betsy's throwing the bouquet." "Are you ready, ladies?" "One, two, three." "I caught it!" " He is late every time." " Yes." "It's OK, I've got it." "Thank you." "Thank you." " Edvard." " Hi, Ari." "His Majesty, the king." "Her Majesty, the queen." "His Royal Highness, the crown prince." "Her Royal Highness, Princess Arabella." "Here we are, honey." " Hope to see you at Thanksgiving." " All right, I love you, Dad." " Bye, sweetheart." " Bye." "Thanks." " Hello?" " Paige, hey." " How's it going?" " Oh, my God." "Good." "How psyched are you to be back?" "Yeah, but this year we do the dishes every three weeks whether we need to or not." "And by "we", I mean you." "Oh, look what my dad hooked me up with." "Yeah." "He may be totally inaccessible emotionally, but he does know how to install some really cool crap." "Well, enjoy it." "I'll be lucky if I'm ever home this year." "I've got a five-hour chem lab, plus med-school applications and work." "Hey, hey, classes haven't even started yet." "Before you start saving the world, you could come to the Rat with me, Stacey and Amanda." "So at this point in the trip, me and the other tour leaders are just..." " We're fed up with all these" " OK, OK." "rich, snotty kids and all of their complaining." "So one night in Rome, we go to this bar, and I kind of slept with a 45-year-old cheesy Italian guy." "Forty-five?" "Wow." "Well, he was cute in a Mussolini kind of way." " What are you gals talking about?" " Our love for older, virile men like you." "A few more of these and believe me, I'll be the best-looking guy in here." " Then you better take Stacey's away." " Oh, yes, please." " You want back on the work rotation?" " Yeah, definitely." " How's tomorrow?" " How's Thursday?" " How's tomorrow?" " Tomorrow it is." "All right." "This round's on me." " Thanks." " Thanks." " Cheers." " Cheers." "I can't believe you got to see all of Europe." "I wish I could fast-forward through the next five years..." "I hate when she starts to talk about her life plan." " It makes me feel so unfocused." " Tell me about it." "I'm a senior, and I've changed my major, like, six times." " I don't even have a major." " Oh, please." "By the time you get one, Paige will be done with Johns Hopkins." " That's if I get in." " You'll get in." "No." "Not after this semester." "I have to take Shakespeare." "Some sort of stupid humanities requirement." "That's it." "The next time you talk about classes or work, you have to do a shot." "It's just that Shakespeare is so useless..." "Stop." " Hey, guys, I need this." " Hey." " Here you go." " No." " No, come on." " Oh, yeah, definitely." " What is this?" " Drink it." "Drink it." " It's your first night." " Cheers." " Cheers." " That's good." "Oh, I hate you guys." "Did you read all the prepared research materials?" "Of course." "Edvard, one day, you will be the 51 st ruler of the longest continuous monarchy" " in the history of the world." " Yes, I'm aware, Father." "It's a monarchy that still requires the participation of the king in the workings and decisions of the government." "So if I ask you if you're prepared, it's not an insignificant question." "Father, I'm prepared, OK?" "His Majesty, the king." "And His Royal Highness, the crown prince." " Your Majesty." " I'm all right." " Prime minister." " Your Royal Highness." "OK, ladies and gentlemen, let's get started." "But a six-percent pay increase is the least the national unions will accept." " That's unconscionable." " Look." "If we can't agree, how are we gonna get the two sides together?" "This is blackmail." "All right, we'll have to make other concessions then." "Is there no end to the workers' demands?" "Our government must refuse to give in to the unions at all costs." "I appreciate your ardor, Thomas, but I assure you they are very serious about the deadline." "Without concessions, they will strike." "A nationwide strike will be disastrous for our economy." "Edvard, I'm sure we'd all like to know what you think." "Sorry, what was the question?" "I was..." "I was busy." "I see." "I don't know why my father insists I go with him." " I've always detested those meetings." " Yes, sir." "Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that," "I don't know, you're going to be king someday." "Yes, don't remind me, Soren." "You're very lucky you're not me, let me tell you." "If you want to change places, sir, call me day or night." "You know my mother's gonna go crazy when she finds out what happened today." "It's a speech I definitely don't want to hear." "I need to get out of Denmark, Soren." "I need to clear my head." "Oh, yes, and where would you like to clear your head this time, sir?" "I hear the slopes are opening early in St. Moritz this year." "Monte Carlo has opened a new casino." "Dropping a few hundred thousand kroner always seems to have worked miracles in the past." "Warning." "The following commercial..." "Wait, no time for that." "Watch this!" "For years, Desperate Dan has been talking real women into doing the most outrageous things." "And he's captured it all on tape." "And now Desperate Dan takes you to America's heartland to bring you Wild College Girls:" "The Girls of Wisconsin." "Oh, please." "Come on, take your top off for us." "Come on, Just once." " Wisconsin?" " Yes." "Why there, son?" "Because I've never spent much time in America before." "And I'd rather go to the heart of the country where I can meet ordinary Americans." "Plus, there's a well-respected university with interesting programs and a wide variety of extracurricular activities." "But this is absurd." "Look, I see this as a real opportunity to find myself." "Oh, Edvard, please." "This is just another in a series of escapades." "Which, by the way, we finance." "Inevitably ending up with you in some tabloid, embarrassing us and forcing you to come back to the palace to hide yourself until you convince us you have to go and find yourself yet again." "If I'm the embarrassment you believe me to be, then maybe you should cut me off." " Well, what are you saying?" " I'm saying I want to go and I'm going." "And I neither require your money nor your permission." " Edvard!" " I will do this on my own, Mother!" "Let him go." "We've tried evertyhing else, and it doesn't work, so..." "Frankly, it's encouraging he even wants to try." "Soren." "You will go with him." "Me, Your Majesty?" "On my own?" "Surely there's a caretaker better suited than..." "I will arrange for our departure." " Hey!" " Slow down." "Just look at them all, Soren." "Thousands upon thousands of young, crazy college girls getting drunk" " and taking their tops off." " Yes, sir, what a treat for us that it's happening here in America's dairy land." "Breeding ground of the coronary bypass patients of the world." "Look at her." "Your parents are expecting you to attend your classes," " Your Royal Highness." " Yes, I know." "Listen, Soren." "From this point forward, I do not want you to address me as the prince or Your Royal Highness." "You will address me as..." "Eddie." "Yes, Eddie." "The last thing I need right now is to have the press all over me." " I think it's gonna be fun." " I'm having a wonderful time already." " Are you unhappy, Soren?" " What gave me away, sir?" "I don't know." "Your expression never changes." " Do you even know how to smile?" " Yes." "Oh, Soren, this is us." "Good heavens." "I thought you had to be convicted of a crime before you lived somewhere like this." "It's not that bad." "Plus, we haven't seen the rest of it yet." "Apparently, this is the rest of it." "Well, I like it." "And I'll even let you have first choice of the beds." "Oh, heavens." "Which stained mattress shall I choose?" "You the new guys?" "I'm Scotty." "All right, all my food's labeled, so I'll know if you ate anything." "I'm allergic to dairy, shellfish, red meat, melon, nuts and kiwi." "So don't bring any of that stuff around here." "The Xbox is off-limits." "If you screw up any of my high scores," "I'll blind you with my laser pointer." "Now, this..." "This is the real university life I was talking about." "You see, here, we're just two typical college students." "Absolutely, sir." "I, for one, can't wait to raucously cheer on the fellows of the tackle football team as they challenge the Gophers, our hated rivals, who apparently hail from a place called Minnesota." "Minnesota sucks!" "Wisconsin rules!" "No, no." "Waitress, we'd like to see some menus, please." "I'm not a waitress, there are no menus, and the kitchen's closed." "Well, then what can you offer us?" "I can offer you beer and pretzel rods, my fine fellow, at ye old pub yonder." " Shall I go to the bar, sir?" " Yes." "Yes, two of these." "Two beers." "Very good." "Would you like another, sir?" " Yes, I'll get these." " Thank you very much, sir." " Hello again." " What can I get for you?" "I was hoping you could recommend something better than what we've been drinking." "Well, for the discerning out-of-towner like yourself," "I recommend Leinenkugel's." "You can really taste the extra 10 cents." "Yes, by all means." "Two, please." "You know, if we were in Germany right now, we'd be underground." " What?" " Rathskeller, it means basement." "OK." "Yes, perhaps I should've known better than to flirt in German." "Perhaps." "It's not a very attractive language, is it?" "No." " I'm Eddie." " Paige." " So will you take your top off for me?" " What?" "Take your top off for me like Wild College Girls." "Just a quick look." "No one's watching." "Just take it off for me." " You, time to go." " Just calm down." " No, you calm down." " Get off me." " You get out." " Get your hands off me." "Out." "Go on!" "Science is a never-ending quest." "For anyone planning a future in science, an open mind is a must." "Grading is as follows:" "Forty percent, procedure." "Fifty percent, lab work." "And ten..." "May I help you?" "Yes." "I believe I'm signed up for this class." "Fine, Mr. Williams." "Next time be here by 8:20, or you'll be locked out." "And what about you?" "I'm talking to you, sir." " I'm auditing." " Not this class, too small." "Take a seat, Mr. Williams." "As I was saying, forty percent, procedure." " Fifty percent, lab work." " You can wait outside." " You'll be all right, sir?" " And ten percent..." " Yes, just wait outside." " You know, if this is a "lovers' thing", could you please take it in the hall?" "Soren, just go." "Go." "My sincerest apologies." "Oh, please proceed." "And ten percent, attendance." "You will find a list in front of you of your supplies and the experiment you will be conducting." "Now, I want you to turn to the person next to you and introduce yourself." "Congratulations, folks, you've just said hello to your permanent lab partner." "Hey." "Hey." "You forgot your supply list." "Oh, right, thank you." " Listen, what's your name again?" " Eddie." "Eddie." "Right." "This class is really important to me because I need this teacher to get me into med school." "And if I'm stuck with you as my partner," "I can't afford to have you screw things up for me, OK?" "It's very important to me, as well." "I love organic chemistry." "I've recently discovered that large amounts of alcohol mixed with a carbon-based life form causes the life form to blurt out stupid things." "So apologies to the other night." "I was just having some fun." "Of course you were." "And I love being made to feel like a brainless slut by some sloppy lush." "Thanks." "I have learned me to repent the sin Of disobedient opposition" "To you and your behest, I am enjoined And beg your pardon" "Is he drunk now?" "It's a play." "Romeo and Juliet?" "Shakespeare?" "This is gonna be a fun semester." "Don't forget your half of the supplies next time." "You would think that after spraying somebody with high-powered soda, he'd get the message to stay away." "Well, I think he's pretty hot." "Hot?" "Oh, my God, Beth, he is so affected." "He was quoting Shakespeare, like some Shakespearean-duke-lord guy." "I hate phonies like that." "So are you saying you wouldn't take him up to the stacks?" "OK." "A, going at it in the dusty stacks of the library is fairly disgusting." "And B, you literally say that about every hot guy." "Oh, so you admit he's hot." "OK, I'm done having this conversation." "I need to concentrate on my applications." "And what's with his weird friend who's always hanging around?" "One partner is monitoring temperature and flow, while the other pours the hydrochloric acid into the separatory funnel." "Now carefully turn the stopcock to allow some of the solution to flow into the round-bottom flask." "Start over again." "Where is he?" " You're still in bed?" " Good morning, miss." "Would you care for some breakfast?" "I spent the last two hours looking like an incompetent idiot because my lab partner didn't show up." " Was that this morning?" " Yes!" "You know, I know exactly who you are." " You do?" " You do?" "You're a spoiled, little rich kid who sees college as a detour on the way to an easy life." "No character." "No accomplishments." " Just a royal pain in the ass." " You're completely wrong." "See, unlike people who are given evertyhing, I have to earn what I get." "But that is the beauty of a meritocracy." "People rise and fall based on how hard they work." "Would you like some more hollandaise?" " No, that's good." "Thank you." " You're making eggs Benedict?" " On a hot plate in a dorm room?" " Yes, just a typical student breakfast." "Would you care to join us?" "No, thank you." " So where's your statue?" " What statue?" "Someone as righteous as you must have a statue of themselves somewhere." "There's a difference between being righteous and being right." "I happen to be right." "Could you please put a shirt on or something?" "If you're going to be a doctor, you'll have to get used to naked men." "Dude!" "Dude, there's a chick in our room." " Just drop the class." " No." "Well, then you better be there, and you better be prepared." "She really meant those things, didn't she?" "Yes, she did seem rather upset, sir." "Though, regardless, I don't see why you would care." "Do enjoy the eggs, sir." "They were purchased with the last of your money." " We have some left, don't we?" " What you came with is gone." "Well, you're getting some sort of paycheck, aren't you?" "Hey, you cheap Swede." ""Skills: polo, fencing, speak French, English, German, Dutch," ""Danish and Flemish"." "Flemish?" "Is there a country called Flem?" "Look, that's all great, but it doesn't mean crap to me." "I need somebody with work experience, and you don't have any." "I really could do with the employment." "There are a lot of students who wanna work here." "Well, I have the highest recommendation." " Hey, Paige." " Hi." "Are you deliberately trying to make me miserable?" "No, I'm simply manning the delicatessen in the event that one of my fellow students wants a tasty sandwich." " Stu, did you hire this guy?" " Yeah." "He came highly recommended." " By whom?" " You." " What would you like?" " A turkey sandwich." "Paige, I'm busy." "Eddie's your boy." "You're in charge of him." "All right, it seems we're completely out of turkey today." "Dude, there's like ten turkey things in there." "Is this some sort of test?" "Did Johns Hopkins send you to see if I can handle pressure?" " Because I'm starting to crack." " Well, who's in charge of carving?" " Use the slicer." " What's that?" "You used me as a reference." "Yes." "Look, you were the only one I knew." "Despite what you think, I do need this job." "I have no money." "But you have a personal egg poacher." "No, no." "He's just another student." "Really?" "What's he studying?" "How to be a 30-year-old junior?" "Try the "on" button." "Look, Paige." "You were right about my parents back in Denmark." "They are from a certain wealth." "But I've cut myself off from them." "Dude." "Yes, just one minute." "Listen, Paige." "I realize I've taken advantage of you recently, and..." "But just give me a chance today, and if I cause any problems, then I'll quit." "OK." "Your right hand goes on the handle." "Slowly slide the meat back and forth." "And unless you want a turkey-thumb sandwich, don't put your hand near the blade when it's moving, OK?" "Right." "OK." " Slowly, slowly." " Right." "Right." "OK, nice and smooth." "That's enough." " Here, Paige, it's your turn tonight." " OK." "Hey, kid." "I need you to go outside and hose down the mats." "Are you sure you don't want a hand, sir?" " No, I'm fine." " Good night." "Hey." "You did OK in there." " You can't be serious, can you?" " Well, by "OK", I mean spilling a ton of beer and screwing up everyone's order." " Yeah." " No, you'll be fine." "You know, this Saturday evening, there's a dorm party at Brenner Hall." "A gathering." "I was wondering if you would like to accompany me." "Accompany you?" "Oh, right, yes." "How do you say it colloquially?" "Yo, dog, there's a mad party kicking at my crib, if you want to roll down there with me." "That was just sad." "Don't ever do that again." "Yes, I really hurt my finger." "So would you like to come?" "I..." "I'm actually kind of busy." "Oh, dear." " What?" " I believe you just got rejected, sir." "You know, I don't think that's ever happened to me before." "You've never been attracted to anyone who didn't know you were a prince before." "I wouldn't get too worked up over it, sir." "The chances of a relationship between yourself and Miss Paige are not promising." "You two are of a completely different caliber." "Soren, just because she isn't royalty doesn't mean she's not important." "The higher caliber I was referring to, sir, was hers." "What?" "Miss." "You really must get some rest, Your Majesty." "I'm relieved there wasn't more to it than this." " There'll be more of these tests, yes?" " I can't say for sure." " There'll be several tests?" " There might be." " Will this take many days?" " No, I'm pretty sure" " we can get them out of the way." " Thank you, doctor." "I don't think you need to go to this." " I promised I'd go." " Are you feeling ill, Daddy?" "There's nothing to worry about, my darling." "Yes, Arabella." "You shouldn't worry." "Just a little flu." "Excuse me, ma'am." "It's time for His Majesty to be going." "Sweetie." "So, what would you like to do today?" " Horse riding." " Good idea." "Duty calls." "Shit." "Positive for ketone." "Mr. Williams, please do something." "So you know the other day when you quoted Romeo and Juliet?" " Yes." " Well, it's funny because I'm actually taking a Shakespeare class myself and..." "I'm not struggling, I'm actually being graded unfairly." "But I was wondering, since you seem to be..." "Well-versed." "Yeah." "Well, I was hoping maybe you could..." "Help you." " No, I don't need help." " Oh, OK." "Just sounded like you were asking me for help, that's all." "Forget it." "Yeah, OK, I need help." "Yes, I'll help you." "It's not a problem." "Only I'm going to need some help of my own first." "Pour the bleach like this:" "And do not spill." "I bet you can't believe I've never done laundry, can you?" "Yeah, it's a real leap." "Cold." "Warm." "Cold, cold." "It's just so confusing." "I mean, how do you know what goes in which pile?" "It's a gift." "I guess you could say I'm the Rain Man of laundry." "OK, now it's my turn." "We did King Lear, and now we're on the Sonnets." "Next, it's Hamlet, which is about a whiny prince from Denmark." " What does that have to do with reality?" " More than you think." "Well, you're from Denmark, do you even have princes?" "Yes, I think we do." "Well, Beth read it, and she said he's a total loser." "Well, you can tell Beth that the prince was young and scared, and he didn't feel ready for the hard choices he had to make." "It's not easy facing that kind of pressure." "Right." "Sonnets, you say." "O me!" "What eyes hath love put in my head" "Which have no correspondence With true sight" "Or if they have Where is my Judgment fled" "That censures falsely What they see aright?" "It's beautiful." "It's gibberish." "I have no idea what he's saying." "Well, he's saying that love is magical, and that it makes people look at each other in an unspoiled way, without judgment." "Why doesn't he just say that?" "Why can't people just say what they mean?" "Well, people rarely say what they mean." "That's the interesting part, is is what's going on underneath the surface." "See, take line 12." "The sun itself sees not Till heaven clears" "What does that mean to you?" "That the sun can't shine when it's cloudy." "No." "You're being too literal." "See, don't just go for the obvious." "See, all these words, they have multiple meanings, and you have to explore the possibilities and then make your choice." "See, like the word "sun", that could mean the actual sun, or it can mean light." "But then "light" can mean knowledge or reason." "That could go on forever." "Yes." "Yes, it could." "But I think in this case it means reason." "And then "heaven" may refer to the pearly gates, or it could mean a state of being, you know," "like being happy or in love." "So now read it again, taking in all the possibilities, and tell me what you think it means." "The sun itself sees not Till heaven clears" "I guess it means that love blinds you." "And when you're in love, you can't think reasonably." "Do you agree?" "Yeah." "I mean, it's just a poem." "Yeah." "Yeah, it's just a poem." "Are you worried a union work stoppage will throw the country into a recession?" "That's something we're striving to avoid." " Mr. Prime Minister." " Do you think being part of the EU has been good for Denmark?" "The United States of Europe is a question of being strong together." "It's another boring photo opportunity of an old guy walking down a carpet answering the same questions he answered last week." " Where's Edvard?" " Now, you see, he was always good for a big disaster every few months or so." "I've got to find him." "Eddie." "Hey." "Look." "It's my Shakespeare midterm." "A-minus." "That's brilliant." "That's really, really good." " Well done." " Thank you." " Thank you, really, for helping me." " It's OK." "I did even better on my chemistry." "It's good." "That's really good." " How'd you do?" " How did I do?" "A minus..." "...three grades." " D-minus." " Yes, but it doesn't matter." " Sure it does." "You can do better." "I know you can." "And give up a brilliant career in the food-service industry?" "Hey, Eddie, do you have any plans for Thanksgiving?" "No, no." "I'll be here." "Have a good vacation." "Yes, you too." "I can't believe you." "I can't believe you, Paige." "You should've invited him home with you." "What?" "No." "That would be so weird." "Well, then you won't mind if I invite him back to Milwaukee with me?" "No." "No, of course not." "Why would I mind?" "I don't know." "Hey, Eddie, since you don't have any other plans," "I was wondering if..." "You wanted to spend Thanksgiving with me and my family?" "Yes, that'd be nice." " Thank you." " Sure." "I think I probably should come with you, sir." "Oh, no, not this time." "The thing is, you see, you'll be on your own." " Yes, and I'll manage." " All right." "Later, dudes." "Actually, sir, it's my duty to look out for you at all times." " Soren, I'll be fine." " With respect, sir," " that's not for you to decide." " Soren, yes, it is for me to decide." "What am I going to do here for five days?" "I don't know." "Just sightsee, relax." "Soren, you'll be fine, OK?" " I'll pick you up Monday." " Thanks again." " Thank you." " Hey." "Hiya, sweetie." "Oh, it's good to have you home." " Hi, Dad." " Hi, kiddo." "This is Eddie." "Eddie, this is my mom and dad." "Oh, we're so glad that you could join us." "The only college friends of Paige's we've ever met, they've all been girls." " Thank you." "I'm glad to be invited." " Hi, I'm Ben Morgan." "Ben, hello." "Hey, hey, Doc Paige." "Farmer John Sausage." " Hey." " Hey." "Oh, Mike, you look great." "Oh, well, you know, Kayla's got me on Slim-Fast, so I lost 15." "And he put five of it back on today at Rocky Rococo's." "Boys." "Who's this guy?" "This is Eddie." "Eddie's an exchange student from Denmark." " He's just a friend." " Hello." " Welcome to our home." " Thank you." "Mike, he speaks better English than you do." "Yeah, anyway..." "Pops, we'll see you in the morning." "Hey, we're watching you, Frenchy." "Come on into the house." " You can ignore the moron twins." " OK." "This is it." " Oh, you can put them right here." " Right." "Thanks." "What are all the pins for?" "The few red ones are where I've been, and all the green ones are where I want to go." "Ecuador, El Salvador." "They're not exactly tourist destinations, are they?" "No, but they're all the places that Doctors Without Borders brings good medical care and vaccinations and clean drinking water." "What?" "Nothing." "I just really never met someone who makes me feel so intimidated." "And believe me, I've met my fair share of intimidating people." "I'm not intimidating." "Look at me." "Yes, well, you see, that's pretty intimidating, as well." "Well, I'm not the only one with goals." "What do you want to do?" "I don't really have any choice." "I have to take over the family business." " No choice at all?" " No." "Careful, you're crushing Gus." "Oh, Gus." "Yes, Gus." "He's a very good watch-moose." "Not once was I attacked by a monster under my bed or something scary in the closet." "Isn't that right, Gus?" "Yes, that's right." "Hello, Gus." "Nice to meet you." "Very pleased to meet you, as well." " I like you like this." " Like what?" "Don't know." "Just like this." "Just Paige." "All right, Eddie, we got John's room made up for you." "It's just down the hall across from our room." " We sleep with the door open." " Thanks, Dad." "So, Eddie, would you like to see how things work around here?" "Maybe help us out tomorrow?" "No, no, I don't think that's such a good idea." " Oh, why not?" " Yes, why not?" "OK." "You know what?" "Go ahead and help out." "I'm gonna enjoy this." "Come on, let's get you settled in." "Stop." "Stop." "This one nearly hit me." "Haven't seen too many tractors, huh?" "Nicely done with the milking." "Yeah, I think you got a new best friend in Bessy." " Hey, should we get some dinner?" " What are those?" " They're lawn mowers." " Lawn mowers." "Really?" "Yeah." "Hey, hey." "Actually, we race these." "It's a huge sport around here." "Really?" " Yeah." " Do you mind if I have a look?" "No, be our guest." "Take a look at this one." "This is my baby." "Right." " I just put a new flywheel in there." " Yes, I see." "You know, no matter how dirty he races, there's no way we're letting Keith Kopetsky take the trophy again this year." " How fast do these things go?" " Well, we clocked it at 52." "I can make it faster." " Yeah." " OK." "Come on." "Let's go." " What?" " That's good." "Oh, you don't believe me?" "I can." " Might be a Thanksgiving pa, huh?" " Yeah." "Are you OK?" " Oh, you had me going." " Not until after the pie, all right?" " Milk?" " Oh, no." "I won't be drinking much milk in the near future." " Ma, great turkey." " Don't eat too much." "We got feeding to do, and I don't need you boys in a turkey coma." " All right." " You've got more work?" " Yeah, 24 hours a day." " Really?" " Have to." " If you don't milk them, the cows' udders will explode." " No." " It happened at Frank Monahan's." "And did you actually see it happen, Mikey?" " No." " You're so bad." "You see, we gotta work twice as hard as corporate-owned farms just to stay afloat." "At this rate, the family farm will be extinct in 20 years." " I don't think he needs to hear it now." " No, I'm interested." "What the big boys need to understand is that we're all interdependent." "And if somebody loses, eventually, we'll all lose." " What?" " Nothing." " Thanks, Dad." " So, Eddie," " what's up with you and my sister?" " Johnny!" "Look, Paige, someone had to ask." "Yeah, Paige, he's too good-looking." " Yeah." " That's right, you're too good-looking." " I'm not that good-looking." " He's pretty good-looking." " You're pretty good-looking." " Oh, yeah." " Guys." " If you combine that with the accent and your Euro-charm, you're a lethal combination." " Would everyone just stop?" "Please." " Paige, we don't even know this guy." "I don't know anyone from Denmark." "I've never heard of anyone from there." " Have you?" " Yeah, sure." "Eddie?" "Kierkegaard, Niels Bohr, Hans Christian Andersen." "Wow." "Hans Christian Andersen?" "Hans Christian Andersen?" "Lars Ulrich." " From Metallica?" " From Metallica." " Get out." " OK." " And Helena Christensen." " Whoa, whoa, wait a second." " The Victoria's Secret model?" " Yes." " OK." " That's gotta be the coolest country" " in the world now." " You should be a superpower." "Yes." "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the Manitowoc County Fairgrounds." "A beautiful day for racing and the 10th annual Mad Mower Derby." "Give them a hand." "We got the seniors' class." "We've got machines up to 15 horsepower." "They'll be blasting by the grandstand at a good eight to 12 miles an hour." "So hang on to your hats when they come by, folks." "Let them hear it when they come past the stands here." "Peterson's coming out of the pit." "Look at him go around that corner." " Come on." "Come on." " We've got a big deal today." "Check it out." "Kopetsky." "What's up, Keith?" "What the hell did you do to that thing?" "I bumped up the compression and a few other little modifications." "All right." "One lap to go, folks." "Let them hear it now." "The last of the five laps here in the senior class." "Osterhouse is pushing." "Now Peterson's moving up." "He's making his move." "Here he comes now." "And here comes Thompson." "There goes Peterson!" "Go, Mr. Peterson." " That's Mr. Peterson?" " He's so damn old." "What a good, clean race we had for the seniors." " Your brothers seem to like him." " Mom." " I like him too." " Yeah, I get that." "I really can't afford any distractions right now." "Chemistry isn't just in a class, kiddo." " And you guys have it." " Right." "Then what happens?" "I fool myself into thinking he's Prince Charming?" "We get married and live happily ever after?" "Then all my work goes down the drain because I'm too busy shopping for groceries and picking my kids up at soccer." "Sweetie, it really wasn't as bad as all that." " I didn't mean it that way." " I know." "But we're not talking about me." "I made my choice." "This is about you making the right choice for you." "OK, we're getting ready for the super-modified class." "OK, your brothers are getting out there." "We have a Le Mans-style start." "The engines will be off." "The drivers, on the gun, will be running on foot across the track," " Go, Eddie." " onto the mowers, start the mowers and start racing." "All right, this one's for all the marbles." "And they've set themselves up on the line now." "Boys, you've been waiting all summer for this." "They're getting ready here." "They're champing at the bit, folks." "All set." "Listen for the gun to start it off." " Shut up." " And they're off." "There they go." " Oh, Williams and Kopetsky collide." " Get up." "Williams is on the ground." "Get out of there before they run you over." "They're firing the machines up now." "Number five is up." "Number seven's up." "Kopetsky pulls right out." "Looks like Williams is having trouble getting his engine going." "And as they head into the first turn," "Kopetsky on number eight is in the lead." "Look at that." "Williams got it running." "But he's got a long way to go." "Go, go, go!" "It looks like the Morgan brothers are really challenging Kopetsky there." "They are chasing him down..." " Ride my tail." " Mike Morgan, on Moovover, second." "And his brother, John, on number seven, is right behind him." "Williams now is on the track, he's catching up." "At the back of the pack, he's starting to move up nicely." "And he's putting on some real speed, but he is way behind." "And it looks like we've got a duel shaping up in the front of the pack." "Mike Morgan is really going after Kopetsky." " Eat it, Morgan!" " Watch it!" "He's pushed Morgan towards the hay bale there." "It looks like he pushed him right off the track." " Damn it!" "God!" " Keep it clean there, Kopetsky." "John Morgan is moving up now to see if he can snatch the lead away from Kopetsky." " Come on, Eddie!" " Go!" "And here comes Williams on number nine." "He's catching up." "This could be a three-way race, folks." " Go, go, go!" " Get him!" "Kopetsky is trying to hold him off now." "Weaving back and forth to the inside." "Williams trying to go outside, now trying to cut inside." "Kopetsky will have none of it." "He's holding him off." "One lap to go." "Let them hear it, folks." "Going around the third corner..." "Go!" "Go!" "Go!" "Williams, the rookie, is really out for the gold." "He's coming after Kopetsky on the inside." "Kopetsky is trying to hold him off with some quick moves." "Watch out for him, Williams." "He'll mess with you." "It's Kopetsky and Williams now." "Oh, my God, they bumped!" "Did you see that?" "Williams is coming in first!" "Williams, the first-time rookie rider, takes the championship of the super-modifieds." "Skoal!" "That's great." " It's stupid." " He said it was for all the marbles." " I won them." "I'm going to keep them." " Hey, you." "Fine race, sir." "Hey!" "Right." " I'm gonna kick your ass." " Just try." "Mike." " Hey, you guys." "John, stop." " You couldn't get me, Kopetsky." " Get off me." " Get off." " Are you OK?" " Yes." "Here, come over here." "I still think we should've stopped at that biker bar, shown them your hog." "Why?" "Are we trying to set some record of how many times" "I can get beaten up in one night?" "If we were fencing, he would've been in serious trouble." "He still would have punched you." "Sorry." "I think that people around here are getting the wrong idea about you and me." "What idea is that?" "That we're involved." "Which we're not." "No." "Definitely not." "Because you hate me." "Yes, very much." "What?" "What's wrong?" "Nothing." "Absolutely nothing." "Which is why I am going to walk you to your door and bid you good night." "He's been like this since I got here yesterday." " Give it back!" " Back off, Clearasil!" " Stop." " You stop." "I'm studying." "Eddie, finals are coming up." "You need to be serious." "I am serious." "OK, I will study." "OK." "I am." "I am." "Study." "No." "Stop." "God, I've read the same sentence 15 times." "Come with me." " Oh, my God!" " Your Highness," " is she your new girlfriend?" " Go!" "Go!" " What's her name?" " This is great!" "Prince Edvard, is this what you've been doing?" "Here!" "This way!" " Come on, hurry!" " Prince Edvard!" " Hurry, hurry!" " Over here!" "Stop!" "Stop!" "Your Highness!" "Prince Edvard, look over here!" " Prince Edvard!" " What is up?" " Go down the stairs." " OK, OK." " Over here, Prince Edvard!" " This way!" " What's her name?" " Hurry!" "I think we have it." "What the hell was that?" "Why were they calling you Prince Edvard?" "Because that's my name." "What?" "That's crazy!" "You're a prince and that's why they were taking photos of us?" "Yes." "Are there a lot of princes where you're from, or are you kind of it?" "I'm it." " You must be freezing." "Let's get you..." " You lied to me!" "No, I didn't lie to you." "I just didn't want to be Prince Edvard for once in my life." "I never should have started this." "You are exactly the kind of distraction I was trying to avoid." "Are those pictures gonna be in the newspaper?" " Yes." "Lots of them." " Are you sure?" "Yes." "This isn't my first indiscretion." "I'm..." "I'm sorry." " Paige, wait." " Stay away from me." " I love you." " You love me?" "Why should I believe that?" " You were just pretending." " No, I wasn't pretending." "No, I wasn't pretending!" "Outside!" "I said, outside!" " Outside!" " Right over here." " I will not tell you again!" " I'm so sorry." "Let's go to work." "Eddie, I think this may be for you." " Hello?" " Soren, put Edvard on the line." "One moment, Your Majesty." "Hello?" " Edvard." " Hello, Mother." "Edvard, you have to come home now." "For your father's sake." "He's very ill." "Lady Macbeth may have convinced him to kill Duncan, but he knew it was his fate long before she even tried." "Destiny is not something that you can fight against." "But what about circumstance?" "Take Othello, for instance." "Was Othello fated to kill Desdemona, or did lago create the circumstance?" "I think it's both." "On the surface, lago is the bad guy." "But if we look closer, we see that the crack lago exploited" " was of Othello's own making." " But still, Othello made choices." "Bad ones." "Othello had love, but he chose not to listen to his heart." "Love doesn't come around every day, and when it does, you gotta grab it and hold on." "I mean, they could've lived happily ever after." "I know that that's a corny schoolgirl fantasy but what if the fantasy actually became true and..." "What if there really is a handsome prince?" " Miss Morgan..." " But he's a really good kisser." "And..." " What if you just know you're in love?" " Miss Morgan..." "And all the things you thought were important don't matter anymore, because the most important thing is to be with him." " Miss Morgan." " Then it's not some silly fantasy." "It's actually real." "I mean, don't you think those two people should be together?" " Yes." " Yes." "Yes." "I do too." "Hi." "Where's Eddie?" "Oh, you mean Prince Ate-My- Triscuits-and-Didn't-Replace-Them?" "He left after his last final." "Someone dropped that off for you." " Where are you going?" " Denmark." " Why?" " It's in the note." "The sun itself sees not Till heaven clears" "Still not really getting it here, Paige." "You've got to look underneath the surface." "So you're just gonna show up at some castle in Denmark," " knock on the door and ask for Eddie?" " I don't know what I'm going to do." "I've never felt this way before." "My stomach is all in knots." "Sounds like you're in love." "I'm not thinking like a sane person right now." "I just know that if I don't see him, I'll spend the rest of my life wondering." " So 310 on this one." " Two sixty on this one." " One thirty-seven on this one." " And 700 on this one." "What?" "Daddy." "Oh, thank you." "Excuse me, what's that building over there?" "This is the old stock exchange." "You see on the roof?" "You know, that's dragons twisting their tails." "Yeah, we're stuck here until it's over." " Until what's over?" " The parade." "Every time the royal family steps out of the house, you know," " they close down half the city." " Really?" " Yeah." " You know, it's OK." "I'll just get out here." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Long live the queen!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" " It's Paige Morgan!" " Paige Morgan?" " Paige Morgan?" " Paige Morgan." "Look, there's Paige Morgan from the newspaper!" "Hi." " Paige!" "Paige!" "Paige!" "Paige!" " Eddie, it's Paige Morgan!" "Paige Morgan!" "Eddie!" "Eddie!" "His Royal Highness, the crown prince, and a guest." " Just wait here." " OK." "Hi." "I now proclaim this session of Parliament open." "Let's go." " Oh, no." " What?" "You didn't tell me you lived with your parents." " Hi." " My word." " Miss Paige." " Soren!" "Oh, hugging the help?" "You're going to fit in very well around here." "Right." "I will see you in a moment." "And Soren will show you where to go." " May I?" " Absolutely." "My pleasure." "This is the south courtyard." "You, of course, came through the private gate." " Hi." " Miss Paige." "Right." "Hi." "This is where we keep the mops." " Absolutely not!" " I love her and she loves me." " Absolutely not!" " I love her and she loves me." " And we will do as we please." " Oh, love." "And when has it ever been about that?" "It has taken us a lot to get where we are today." "All we want is to be together." "It has taken you a lot to get to where you are?" "It has taken us 1200 years to get to where we are." "In a few weeks' time, you will ascend the throne as king, and I will let nothing stand in the way of that." "Certainly not some tawdry little affair with a gold-digging American girl who dreams of becoming the next Princess Di." "Mother, you cannot tell me whom to love and how to live my life." "Edvard, I am sure she has outstanding qualities." "But once the news of your father's illness becomes public, the people will require reassurance." "Yes, and I will proudly and confidently ascend the throne." " Good." " As soon as you allow me to choose my own bride." "Out of the question." "She is a commoner." "Well, then I hope you think that Arabella is fit to be the queen at the age of 12." "Oh, no, I'm forgetting about Nestor." "Oh, don't threaten us!" "Cousin Bartholomew's idiot son, Nestor." "The 47-year-old virgin in diapers." "Oh, the people will rejoice." "Enough!" "Edvard, you will be the next king of Denmark." " Do you hear me?" " Yes, sir." "Now, about your young lady." "If you say you love her as you do, and you believe she will make you happy, then marry her." "Haraald, you can't mean that." "Maybe this is not a good time to discuss..." "No, it's a perfect time." "It is at the end of a man's life when he realizes how important his decisions were at the beginning." "And in 1502, King Gustav iv fell, hit his head on a rock, had his famous moment of enlightenment." "Claimed he saw God at the bottom of this lake." "He went charging off through the castle to tell everyone." "Unfortunately, he was carrying a torch." "Curtains caught fire, burnt down half the palace." "Thus, observe the new wing." "He takes great pleasure in twisting my ancestors' history." "Today has been the most incredible day of my life." "Come with me." "I have something important to tell you." "Yeah?" "The reason I had to come back is because my father has decided to pass the crown to me." "So you're gonna be king." "Yes." "I love you so much." "And I know the sacrifices you would have to make." "What are you doing?" "Paige Morgan, will you marry me?" "Yes." "Oh, good morning." " Good morning, ma'am." " Good morning." " Coffee?" " Oh, I can get it myself if you show me where the kitchen is." "Or a Starbucks?" " Grande decaf nonfat latte." " Yes, ma'am." "Congratulations!" "You and Edvard getting married!" "It's so romantic!" " You must be Arabella." " Call me Ari." "Isn't it wonderful?" "We're going to be sisters." "More hugging?" " Whatever will we do with you?" " Thank you." "Well, then, I thought we might run through your schedule for the day." "I have a schedule?" "As of this morning you do." "Come on." "At 9:00, you have a groundbreaking with Edvard." "Also attending will be Countess Yungen." "Remember, if you're facing her, the good eye is the left one." "At 10:15, there's a photo opportunity." "Holding hands with Edvard on the royal yacht." "Opening of a Miro exhibit at the museum at noon." "12:40 is when you can call your parents." "Yes, a 1:00 luncheon with the queen." "Deep breaths." "You'll get through this in spectacular fashion." "After all, that's what the people expect of our future queen." "Oh, my God." "What?" "Queen." "I mean, I knew it worked that way, but I hadn't really thought about it like that." "Do you think that people are gonna mind if I'm gonna be their queen" " and all I've seen is the airport?" " No." "Anna." "Do you a have dress for Eddie's coronation ball yet?" " No." " You may come in now." "This is Margueritte." "She can design anything you like." "Chanel, Dior, Armani, Prada." " It's very nice to meet you." " Turn." "Excuse me?" "Turn." "Come, ladies." "Long torso." "Good figure." "Terrible American posture." "I don't work with hunchbacks." " When is the wedding, Miss Morgan?" " Good morning." "When these plants are completed," "Denmark will lead the European community in vegetable oil and specialty fat production." "Farm girl." "So where do the future king and queen go on their honeymoon?" "I was thinking Morocco." "It's really hard to organize security there." "Oh, right, OK." "What about Spain?" "Yes, Spain is good." "I'm sure King Juan Carlos won't mind lending us his private island for a few weeks in the summer." "I swear." "Well, it's hanging well in the front." "Is this part supposed to be loose?" " She doesn't speak." " At all?" "To you." "Well, is this part supposed to be loose?" "Well, it has been worn that way for the past 200 years." "The opening of this new wing of the Dangard Pediatric Hospital illustrates..." " Where's Paige?" " I don't know." "...our country's commitment to improving healthcare for all of our people..." "There she is." "I was just being nice to some kids." "Which every paper felt compelled to report." "Well, what's wrong with that?" "That you did it in a new, state-of-the-art, government-funded, billion-kroner hospital, which suddenly all these newspapers have no interest in mentioning." "We had an opportunity on the eve of a national strike, to show the people what their healthcare system can do for them." "Instead, all they know is that you are nice to children." "I'm sorry." "I'm trying." "It's gonna take me a while to get the hang of things." "Being royal is not like being famous or being rich." "It is something much, much more." "It is a way of being that can only be learned from birth." "It is an embodiment which requires you to sacrifice who you are for who you must be." "Well, I'm Paige Morgan from Manitowoc, Wisconsin." "Paige Morgan can no longer exist." "She is gone." "You are now the future queen of Denmark plain and simple." "Excuse me, Your Majesty." "Your Royal Highness, it's time to leave." "All right." "Thank you, Soren." "His Royal Highness, the crown prince." " Royal Highness." " Prime minister." "Good morning, ladies and gentlemen." "In the interest of expedience," "I've asked the lead negotiator for the national unions and the lead negotiator for our nation's corporate interests to join us." "Good morning." " I'm very pleased to meet you." " Nice to meet you again." "Your Royal Highness." "I know your exposure to these proceedings has been rather limited..." "Mr. Anderson, I'm well aware of the traditions and the protocols of this chamber, and while I respect them, we only have six hours before all hell breaks loose." "So don't you think the time for gamesmanship has passed?" " Yes, sir." " Then we are in agreement." "Please be seated." "And get comfortable because we're not leaving here until this is solved." "And where will this additional money come from?" "Well, perhaps management will tighten their belts." " Our belts?" " Yes!" "It might do you some good" " to go without." " These are businesses, not charities." "If we can't come to a resolution about wages, perhaps we can discuss concessions on benefits." " No concessions!" " You take and take" " and will give nothing in return!" " You are impossible!" "Gentlemen, please." "Let's remember this is not about us." "You know, when I was in America," "I spent some time with Paige's family on her farm." "And they explained something to me." "That we are all interdependent." "So we had better start caring for our opposition as much as we do for ourselves." "I wonder if anyone on this table knows what it's like to work for a tiny wage." "And then to see that wage get sliced up even further by taxes." "Now, I can tell you from experience, it can be a mighty struggle." "But then I suspect it would be substantially more difficult to see your job and your benefits disappear altogether." "Now, at the moment, we are six percent apart." "Correct?" "Now, if the goal is to let the workers keep more without damaging the corporation, then perhaps there's a third path to consider." "He was brilliant." "He got the unions to lower their demands, the corporations to raise their offer, and Parliament to cut the workers' wage tax to make up the difference." "Now, that's impressive." "OK, about the dress." "Am I supposed to be able to breathe?" " No." " Oh, well, then it's perfect." "Miss Paige, the queen would like to see you immediately." "Don't worry." "I'll be by your side the entire time." " Soren, get out." " Yes, Your Majesty." "Thanks." "These are my new babies." "My new hopefuls." "I know you think I don't like you." "I like traditions." "I like traditions, and I like consistency and continuity, and I don't like change." "But when that change is for the better when it helps turn a boy into a man then I have to reconsider." "Two weeks ago, I thought you were the end of the monarchy." "Now I see you may be the best thing that ever happened to us." "Thank you." "And now we have that settled we have to make you into the best queen that Denmark has ever had." "Come with me." "Between you and me, Paige, being queen is not without its charms." "So, my dear, what would you like to wear to the coronation ball?" "Very beautiful." "Your ears will be killing you by the end of the evening, though." "Trust me." "Harry Winston." "It's very appropriate." " Sorry." "Would you excuse me?" " Certainly, sir." "Yes, Your Highness." "Sorry." "Pardon me." "Paige, may I have this dance?" "Of course." "I hope you don't mind, but I've requested our song." "We have a song?" "We have a song." "Let's go somewhere." "It kind of bothers me." "Right." "Come with me." "Excuse me, sir." "I know that you and your father wanted to speak privately with the king of Norway before he left." "Right, of course." "Thank you, Soren." "Listen, when I get back, I've got a special treat for you." "Oh, good." "I was wondering when I was going to start being treated well." " Good to see you." " Good to see you, sir." "Edvard." " You remember my son, Edvard?" " Very nice to meet you." " Nice to see you again." " You too." "Father, I really think you should be sitting down." "Did those Egyptian photographers make you pose for all those photos riding on camels?" " Yeah." " Interesting creatures." "They store all that water, but they never seem to bathe in it." "Oh, yeah." "So down to business." "We have to talk about fishing rights." "We've both signed a treaty." "The main thing is to maintain stock and to respect..." "Right, I've got something to show you." "Stay there." "Now, relax, my dear, as I make you the perfect sandwich." "I think you'll find that the student has now become the teacher." "I can see how proud your father is of you." "Yes." "Eddie, this has all been extraordinary." "A real life fairy tale." "But I can't do it anymore." "What?" "What are you saying?" "I'm saying I can't stay." "Well, what's the matter?" "When I first met you," "I was so focused because I was scared." "And you got me out of that, which is the greatest thing anyone's ever done for me." "But I'm still me, and all the things that I want to do are still a part of me, and I thought I could make myself forget about that, but I can't." "What about us?" "You belong here, not me." "And your father needs you to be there for your mother and Arabella." "I mean, is that it?" "We never see each other again?" "I don't know." "I don't know." "I can't make you stay, can I?" "I can't make you stay." "Long live His Majesty, King Edvard lll." "Today marks a profound, though bittersweet, milestone for all of us as we bear witness to both an end and a beginning." "And while we must continue on, we must also be grateful" "to have been blessed with someone who has so ably guided us to where we are today." "When there has been so much love and happiness for someone it is natural to be reluctant to close such a wonderful chapter in our lives." " Excuse me." " For moving forward is rarely accomplished without considerable grief and sadness." "And while our sorrow may be profound the clouds will clear and the sun will shine on us again." "And in that warm, bright light we will find ourselves facing a glorious future." "A future of exciting challenges and infinite possibility in which the horizon will stretch out before us rimmed in the heavenly glow of the sunrise of our tomorrow." "Can everybody...?" "Can we get the girls together for a group shot?" "Just a quick one." "OK." "Great." "All right." "OK." "Amy, sweetheart." "All right, Amy." "Amy, here." "All right, girls?" "Girls?" " Say, "Cheese curds"." " Cheese curds!" "Excellent." "Beautiful, girls." "I'm so proud of you." "Let me see." "Oh, sweetheart..." "Thou art as wise as thou art beautiful" "I want you in my life, Paige." "I want to marry you." "If that means I have to wait until you finish medical school, become a doctor and anything else you want to do, then I'll do it." "I'll wait." "Denmark isn't ready for a queen like me." "Well, then they'll have to be because I am."