"masters.of.horror Season 2 Episode 12" "Oh,my." "Look at the messthat you're making." "When did my princessturn into such a little slob?" "Just like her daddy." "Come on!" "Wake up,people,and give me a break,will you?" "You people should know me better than that by now." "George rathbun speaks the truth!" "The simple truth." "I am amazed.No,I am flabbergasted, at how many american citizens continue to believe the horse crap our government is feeding us!" "Okay,folks." "Take a deep breath and listen to me!" "During the first gulf war there were something like 120,000 iraqis killed, and despite what we did or did not hear, not all of them were soldiers or little husseins in training." "Many of them were just ordinary men,women, and children who happened to live in the same geographical areas in which we were dropping our bombs." "Now,did we know that?" "No,we certainly did not!" "And why?" "I'll tell you why." "Because our news is controlled and filtered by our government." "Did you see bodies on the news?" "Are we there yet?" "Almost,baby." "Can we turn that off?" "that man's given mea headache." "Well,all that talk aboutdead bodies and blood might be a bit much,don't you think?" "Sorry about that." "It's just a long drive." "That's okay." "Here it is." "Do you remember it,amy?" "Yeah.I remember." "It gave me the creepsback then, and it's giving methe creeps right now." "Remember whatwe talked about?" "Try not to bescared of everything." "Try to be brave." "I'm not scared,daddy." "I promise." "Hello?" "That must be the guy's car I talked to on the phone." "Hello!" "Is anybody there?" "Sir?" "Well,hey there,folks." "I never heard youdrive up." "Sorry to interruptyour nap." "No,no need to be sorry,son." "I always liketo see new faces, especially when they're as prettyas these two." "I'm mike franks." "I believewe spoke on the phone." "mr.Franks,I am so sorryfor your loss." "I knew yourgrandmother very well." "She was a special lady." "It's never easy when someone crosses overto the other side." "But I thank the lord she swept offthat mortal coil without any painor suffering." "We should all beso lucky." "Thank you." "This is my wife pamand my daughter amy." "And I am samuel madison iii, and it is my honorto meet you and you family and little miss cupcake." "You can call me sam." "It's okay,amy.You can shake his hand." "This one's scaredof her own shadow." "And a pretty littleshadow it must be." "I do believe" "I do believethese belong to you now." "We can process the necessary paperworkafter the service." "No rush on my end." "I just hope you have a peacefulstay as can be." "Now,I have beensaving this for just the mostperfect day for just the mostperfect occasion." "I think I'd liketo give it to you." "It's my favorite flavor." "Cherry." "Thank you,sam." "Just let me know if there's anything elseI can do for you folks." "I think I just bettermosey yonder on." "Thank you." "I told you,you don't need to bescared of everyone." "Not everyone's going to reach outand bite you." "Come on." "Great grams used to make the best chocolatefudge brownies." "She used to putthose little sprinkles on top." "They were so yummy." "I don't remember them." "The car's unpacked." "Anybody hungry?" "I have to usethe bathroom." "It's down the hallwayaround to your right." "It's just aroundthe corner,honey." "Go on.You're a big girl." "She gets that from you." "I'm not afraid." "I'm not afraid." "I'm not afraid." "I'm not afraid." "I'm not afraid." "I'm not afraid." "I'm not afraid." "Amy!" "Daddy!" "There's a mandownstairs!" "Are you okay?" "Come here." "Come on,it's okay." "See?" "It's just a painting." "But I got to tell you, you're a lot braverthan I used to be." "When I was little,I'd never come down here." "That old paintingcreeped me out too much." "I don't know whythat door was open." "My grandma alwayskept it locked." "You doing okay?" "Yeah,I was just thinking." "We'll be the only relativesat the funeral tomorrow." "There's no one else left." "When my grandfather died, my grandmother hadeverything from the store packed upand moved down here." "I think it was her wayof keeping him close." "Your grandfather hada tobacco shop when you weregrowing up,right?" "In town." "It was more than justa tobacco shop." "He has shelves and shelvesof little artifacts from american history." "It was like his ownlittle museum." "You know,it looks like somebody's gone through these already." "I'm not afraid of you." "I'm not afraid of you." "I'm not afraid of you!" "I'm not afraid of you!" "Oh,my god!" "Amy!" "What in the worldwere you doing?" "I was just tryingto be brave." "Are you okay?" "Nice catch." "You okay?" "Let's go get youcleaned up." "I will skin your children and eat them." "Upon finishing,I will fashion utensils out of their bones." "Is it damaged?" "Jesus,you're scaring me." "Sorry." "Take a look at this." "This is bizarre." "I found it hiddenbehind this canvas." ""G.W."" "G.W." "No way." "George washingtonwas the father of our country." "He chopped up cherry trees,not the arms and legsof children." "Take a look at this." "Looks like bone to me." "Yeah." "Maybe even human bone." "You're serious." "You really think it was written bygeorge washington?" "I said it could have been." "So where didthe painting come from?" "I don't know.It's been around since way beforeI was born." "Do you knowhe was bn around here?" "Who was born around here?" " Washington." " Washington?" "Yeah." "I didn't know that." "Did you hear that?" "Hear what?" "What is it?" "I heard something." "Maybe it wasgeorge washington looking forsome children to eat." "Come inside." "We've got a long day tomorrow." "There they are." "Hello." "Good afternoon,mrs.Franks.Amy." "Mr.Franks, please allow meto introduce some lifelong friendsof your grandparents." "This is nancy arnold." "Hello." "I'm so sorryabout your grandmother." "She was a wonderful woman." "A true blessingto this community." "And you must be little amy." "I've heard preciousthings about you." "Name is jared barkish." "I knew your grandfatherback in the day." "We used to gather down in his tobacco shop." "We shared many a cigarand many a meal with him." "It's a pleasureto meet you." "I appreciate you all coming." "How old is yourdaughter,mr.Franks?" "She's-- amy just turned 10a month ago." "Just turned 10?" "Ladies and gentlemen,please." "Gather round,folks." "The service isabout to begin." "Let's meet later this evening,if you're up to it." "God bless you,son." "Today,we are gathered here to honor the memoryof jephine franks." "If I might ask,mr.Franks, what do you plan to do with your grandfather'sbelongings?" "Keep some things,sell the rest." "There you go." "You do know your grandfather was quite a collector?" "Yes,I do." "There might be something there worth more than the unexperienced eyecan see." "Not everythingyour grandfather did was what itappeared to be." "Oh,coffee's on me." "At least let meget the tip." "All right.Whatever." "You know,I appreciate all your help." "You've been very kind to meand my family." "The pleasure was all mine,good sir." "You know,I did find something in my grandmother's house." "Maybe you can tell mewhat to make of it." "Where did you find this?" "In the basement." "G.W.!" "George washington?" "You do know that george washington was bornaround these parts." "up north." "Virginia planter family." "My grandfather told methat story many times." "This letter, this could very well be an authentic pieceof american history." "May I ask,mr.Franks, what do you planto do with this?" "I haven't reallygiven it much thought." "Would you like meto hold on to it for you,check with somecolleagues of mine?" "I probably shoulddiscuss it with my wife." "If you wouldconsider selling it," "I'm sure I could findsome interested parties." "No,I-- wait,wait,wait." "Come to think about it," "I know a collectorwho might pay top dollar for something like this." "Would you mindif I gave him a call?" "He's very discrete,very powerful, and I ha every reasonto believe he'D." "be very generous." "No.I don't think so." "I'll call him for your right now,set it all up." "If this is the real thing," "I probably should get it in a museum somewhere." "I'm not sure you realizewhat you have here,mr.Franks." "This single sheet of paper could entirely rewrite the historyof our country." "This letter could foreverchange the image we have ofgeorge washington." "That's an immenseresponsibility,sir." "Think about it." "You want this knowledgeto be known?" "I'll discuss itwith my wife." "I appreciate everything you've done forme and my family, and being so quickwith my grandmother's estate and it was a pleasureto know you." "Thank you very much." "If I may,mr.Franks?" "I would like to suggestyou do something." "What's that?" "Sleep on it." "Sleep on this,old man." "Pam!" "Pam!" "Pam,where are you?" "I'm down here!" "What are you yelling about?" "Is everything okay?" "No,everythingis not okay." "Something weirdis going on." "What do you mean "weird"?" "First off,sam madison just provedthat he's a lunatic, and I was just followed homeby a guy on horseback." " What?" " It was the weirdest thing." "I'm driving along and I look outsidethe window, and there's this guyriding along side the car with his horse." "He's got thismakeup on his face and it's creepy as hell." "Honey,it was probablyjust come local having a laugh." "Pam,I almostwrecked the car." "Go on.What happenedwith samuel?" "I showed him the letter and he freaked out." "What,he thinks it's real?" "Look,you should haveseen his face." "I didn't think he was going togive this back." "That sweet old man?" "Sweet old man,nothing.I thought he was going toeat me for lunch." "Look,it's not funny." "He went on and onabout how this letter could change the courseof american history, how washington's imagecould be ruined if this letterwas made public." "So he really thinks that george washington wassome kind of cannibal?" "Nothing but meatas far as the eye can see." "Squirrel meat,rabbit meat,puppy meat." "Daddy!" "How are you folksdoing tonight?" "We're doing just fine,thank you." "Get you anythingto drink?" "Diet coke." "Do you haveany chocolate milk?" "Why,yes,we do." "Oh,my.Little sweetie, you're about cuteenough to eat." "Be right backto take your orders." "You're about cute enough to eat." "cute enough to eat." "You're about cute enough to eat!" "Here we go!" "And here's your chocolate milkjust for you!" "oh,my god." "They're lookingfor the letter." "Who?" "Sam and that guy on the horse,I'm telling you." "Where is the letter?" "I kept it with me." "Oh,no." "What on earthare you doing?" "It's gone." "What is?" "The fork!" "The bone." "Whateverthe hell it is." "It's gone!" "You said this isyour grandmother's house?" "You're here becauseshe recently passed away?" "Yeah,that's right." "Is it possiblethis happened because of somethingyour grandmother did?" "Do you know ifshe had any enemies?" "Was she involved in drugs?" "Guys,my grandmawas 86 years old." "They take anythingfrom the house?" "Anything at all?" "Maybe something thatthe heart could be considered some sort of trade for?" "A trade?" "An exchange." "Maybe the heartwas a gift." "Seems more likea warning to me." "Don't you thinkif it was a warning, they would have lefta head instead?" "Yeah,you're right." "A head would be better." "What the hell are youtwo talking about?" "Do you thinkit was a warning?" "You having problemswith anyone here in town?" "We just got hereyesterday." "I don't knowanybody in town." "Okay,listen,mr.Franks." "Tomorrow we'll come back and look aroundin the daylight." "If you can thinkof anything else,feel freeto give us a call." "I will.Thanks." "Just do us one favor,mr.Franks." "What's that?" "Sleep on it." "We're gettingthe hell out of here." "Right now." "She's sleeping." " Need some help?" " I got her." "Good night,princess." "Daddy?" "Do you want to come in?" "Amy!" "What's wrong?" "There's a manoutside my window!" "I don't see anyone." "Honey,are you sure it wasn'tjust a dream?" "It wasn't a dream!" "I promise." "George washington was standing right outside my window." "What the fuck?" "Give us the letter." "We know you have it." "Is it george washington,daddy?" "We know you're inthere,franks." "Give us the letterand you and your family will not be harmed." "Just give it to them,mike!" "Did you see his teeth,daddy?" "Give us the damned letter or we'll carve youinto pieces!" "Call the police!" "Now!" "We're calling the police!" "They'll be hereany minute!" "9-1-1." "Yes,we have an emergencyat 2285 edgewood." "Yes.Please hurry." "We will skinyour child alive." "It's okay." "This is your finalwarning,mr.Franks!" "Give us the letter!" "Fuck." "We'll be back." "They're gone." " Don't en the door!" " No,daddy." "I'll be right back." "Daddy,please don't go." "It's okay,baby." "I still don't understand why you didn't tell the policeabout the letter." "I told you,honey." "We don't know who we can trustand who we can'T." "We can't just give itto anyone." "I don't care whowe give it to," "I just don't want itin this house." "I'll just call-- why don't we justburn the damn thing?" "We can't burn it." "What if it's the truth?" "We have an obligation." "You saw those men,mike." "You saw them and you heardwhathey said." "Okay,let me just call professor hartkinson." "The man knew more aboutamerican history than anyone I've ever met,including my grandfather." "We can trust him." "Michael franks,what a nice surprise." "Thanks for taking my call." "listen,pro the reason why I'm calling, this is going to sound crazy,but." "last night me and my wifewere woken up by our daughter." "She said that she sawsomeone outside her window." "Then there wasa pounding on the door and I looked outside and on our porchthere are four men wearing powdered wigs and what looked likerevolutionary war clothes." "Did you see their teeth?" "How did you know that?" "Michael,tell meabout their teeth." "They were fake-looking." "Horrible." "Washingtonians." "Washingtonians?" "Washingtonians." "You're lucky you came to me." "They have spies everywhere." "What do you have?" "What?" "You must have something, otherwise they wouldn't be after you.What is it?" "I'd rather not talk about that on the phone." "No,no,no.Of course not.I'll come to you." "Look,my last classends at 6:30." "I'll see you then." "Listen,michael,be very,very careful." "You and your familyare in grave danger." "Professor." " Thank you for coming." " Been a long time." "Come inside." "In there." "The washingtonians?" "Who the fuck are they?" "The washingtonians." "they are the fringeof the fringe, and they are sworn to protect washington'strue legacy." ""I will skin your childrenand eat them."" "What does it mean?" "It's the truth." "What's in this letteris the truth." "George washingtonwas a cannibal,michael." "He was a fiend.A murderer,a child-eater." "He was also chosento be father of our country, and that image was more importantthan the actuality." "History,michael,is myth." "It's far more than a collection of names,dates,and places." "It's a system of beliefs, and ultimately it saysmore about the people who bought into those beliefs than the actual historical participantsthemselves." "We're taught in school george washington:" "Father of our untry." "L.C Freed the slaves." "That's our lastingimpression of them." "In fact,we arewho we are as a nation because of whatwe believe they were." "what we were told to believe." "Let me tell you something about historians,michael." "Historians are notinterested in the truth." "They aren't interestedin facts." "They aren't interested in teaching peoplewhat actually happened." "No,they're far more concerned with perpetuating the liesthat they were sworn to defend." "We're very much like politicians in that regard." "I want to show you something." "You know,it's a very exclusive club, those people that know the reasons we actuallyfought our wars, what actually happened behind closed doorsof our world leaders." "Very exclusive club,and they wantto keep it exclusive." "But there are those of usthat are altruists, people like myself," "who want to learnand share what we learned." "But,michael,the majority of historians, they're nothingbut pr people for the past." "No,americanswanted to believe that george washingtonwas a great man." "They wanted him to befather of our country, needed him to be father of our country, and so for that reasonthey were only too happy to believe what we historians told themto believe." "No,george washington was notthe gentle kind old man that we put him up to be." "He was a monster." "You've stumbled on something very interesting here, but they're notgoing to give up." "They're not going tolet this note get further than youand your family." "You said you have a daughter." "Is she a virgin?" "She's ten years old." "This is not good." "Why isn't that good?" "The washingtonianswear an insignia on their arm." "It's a cherry treeand a hatchet." "I've seen that." "Well,in this particular casethe cherry tree represents george washington'swell-documented." "fondness for the meatof virgins." "Michael,they all like virgin meat." "We know you'rein there,franks!" "Give us the damned letter!" "Take the letter." "If it's the truth,you got to get itto the right people." "I'll guard itwith my life." "Pam!" "Amy!" "What would they doif they catch us?" "Kill us.and eat us!" "Go!" "What's going on,mike?" "Here we are!" "Mike." "Mike,are you okay,honey?" "Come on,princess." "We're not going to hurt you." "That's right.We're just going to eat you!" "Where are you taking us?" "We've been awaitingyour arrival." "Won't you please join us?" "Welcome to the originalfeasting lodge of george washington." "We are thrilledto have you for dinner." "Oh,where are my manners?" "Mr.Franks,we are delighted to makeyour acquaintance." "Please,follow me." "I have somethingto show you." "Hey,pull up a chair,mr.Franks!" "It's all quite delicious." "Tastes just like beef." "Tastes morelike pork to me." "Pork?" "It doesn't tastelike pork to me." "Tastes like chicken." "Hey,there,little sweetie." "You're aboutcute enough to eat!" "Step this way." "There.Now, these forks were carvedentirely from the femurs of the firstcontinental congress." "And this fork which you found atyour grandmother's house completed our collection." "We have tothank you for that." "And now,this portraitwashington commissioned when he firstbecame president." "He first acquired the taste during the long winter at valley forge when he and his menwere starving." "Without suppliesor reinforcements, the army beganto eat its dead." "Washington found that he not only enjoyedthe taste,of course, but he found it gave himgreat power and clearness of mind." "Even after supplies began to arrive, he still killed a man a day for his meals." "Soon he began to realize that with the controlof his army he was in a position where he couldmake all the shots." "He could createa country of cannibals, a nation celebratingand dedicated to the eatingof human flesh." "Thomas jeffersongave his life to us." "Did you know that?" "Come here." "He sacrificedhimself right here." "His blood anointed this wood." "He allowed washingtonians to rip him apart with their bare hands." "And this isour prize possession." "These belonged topresident washington himself." "Priceless." "You're insane." "All of you." "Your hero george washington was nothing buta filthy monst-- you are not a guest here,mr.Franks." "You are a prisoner." "for now." "Later on,you may be supper." "Daddy!" "No!" "You two." "may be dessert." "Especial this one." "Don't touch them." "Eat me!" "Eat me,you sons of bitches!" "Don't worry.We will." "Your grandfatherwould have been so disappointedin you,michael!" "Yes,my son,he was a proudwashingtonian, a good loyal comrade," "and he is dearly missed." "Here,here!" "I'm only going to ask you this one time,mr.Franks." "Where is the letter?" "You'll neversee that letter." "As you wish." "Go ahead." "No.No!" "Mommy,no!" "No!" "No!" "You harm her,I swear, you'll neversee that letter." "I hardly think you're in any position to" "Everybody having a good time?" "You look disgusting." "Everybody okay?" "Okay.Check to see who's still aliveand shoot them." "Go." "Michael!" "Michael,you got to getyour family out of here." "Come on." "Guys,let's go.Quick,quick,quick." "Who are they?" "Federal agents." "How you doing,andy?" " Hey,bob." " How are they going toexplain all this?" "They workfor the government." "Roswell,all those other cover-ups." "This incidentwill never have happened." "Trust me,these guys will sweep everythingunder the carpet." "Let's get out of here." "What about the letter?" "Tell the world." "It's history!" "SIX MONTHS LATER" "Got it." "Allow me to quote my good buddy,jack nicholson." "The truth?" "You can't ha-a-andle the truth." "Two order fried tofu, two order vegetarian lo mein, one order with rice." "All right?" "That's right." "Hey,you no like meat,huh?" "What's this?" "That the new dollar bill." "They swapped georges." "No shit." "No shit." "No shit is right."