"Brooahhh!" "Coffee coffee coffee!" "Coffee!" "It's not as strong as methamphetamine, but it lets you keep your teeth." "Oh, this is just a walk-in freezer." "I don't want any snow cones." "I can't go back." "Ah, maybe there's another air vent." "Then I can crawl away forever." "Ice." "They need one of those safety signs." "Uhk!" "Pig guts." "You know, I'm starting to wish I hadn't gotten wet earlier." "It's cold in here." "Well, more blood." "Hey!" "Where's the party?" "Oh god!" "Ok, lead the way." "Where are we going?" "What?" "!" "You're going to hide in the corner?" "Are you five years old?" "!" "Man, now I'm almost out of bullets." "Are you happy?" "I'm not!" "You know what?" "You can stay in the corner." "You've earned it." "I'm gonna come back with a dunce cap for you and you're gonna wear it!" "God, look at how big that thing is!" "And the teeth!" "I need more bullets." "I can't be wrestling these things with my bare hands." "Or a chainsaw!" "That would be cool." "*makes chainsaw noise*" "I need a chainsaw and a hockey mask." "Then we'll see who messes with me." "YES!" "Some more thoughtful people left me their ammo." "Is that a hand grenade?" "Oh my god, it is!" "It's like Christmas around here." "People are gonna crap their pants if I wave this around." "They'll do anything I want." "I'm saving this for later." "I'm not gonna waste this on just anybody." "Yep, back to lead salad for the rest of you." "What's that noise?" "QUIET!" "Does the kitchen slaughter hogs in here?" "Yeah, that's right." "Just puke on my suit." "It doesn't matter anymore." "It's already got blood all over it." "Most of it's not even my blood- it's from the OTHER alien that puked on me." "I'm probably carrying a few blood-borne diseases on my suit." "I'm a walking CDC nightmare." "It makes me wanna hug someone." "You know, with all these meat slab hanging I" "DAMN IT!" "Will you stop doing that?" "!" "I can't concentrate when you do that!" "What was I thinking about?" "Oh yeah, how are they getting those meat slabs in here?" "I thought there'd be a loading bay." "Do they just hike them through the labs?" "AH, damnit." "I've gone in circles again." "This always happens." "HEY!" "There's my air vent." "Does it lead back there?" "Yeah, there's another dead guy." "That's a good sign, right?" "It's kind of a bummer." "Here I thought I was being original, but it looks like everybody's doing the air vent thing." "Why can't I start my OWN fad?" "I guess I'm the only one who hasn't died doing this." "That's kind of original around here." "I still can't believe those idiots crawled into the fan blades." "I once bet my old roommate to stick his hand in a blender and even he wasn't dumb enough for that." "But you are!" "HA!" "I bet you don't even have a frontal lobe." "I'll take that." "What's that thing?" "A car battery?" "That's not really worth pawning." "It looks heavy, I'll leave it." "Ah, nuts." "I forgot to make a dunce cap for that guy." "I was hoping I could find some poster board and a marker." "Oh, well." "I'm not going back for him." "I'm not going back for anybody." "Whoa!" "A human skull." "That would go great with my collection." "Hmm, maybe I'll wait." "I don't want to clean it myself." "Besides, I think Eddie said he was gonna get some more in for pretty cheap." "Where the hell am I?" "I should be careful." "If I were to die right now I bet NO ONE would find my body." "I can't let that happen." "When I die, for my funeral, I want them to be shootings bombs off in the air, and have two F-16 fighter jets doing barrel rolls overhead." "That would be AWESOME." "And really, it's what I deserve." "God, who designed this room?" "M.C. Escher?" "It's like one of those little gerbil mazes where you make them run through the tubes." "Except they get to cheat because th" "What?" "because their tubes are transparent." "And they're gerbils." "I bet you eat gerbils." "WELL I'M NOT A GERBIL!" "God DAMN those things are nasty!" "And it's flicking me off." "I think." "Why is there a ladder here if it doesn't go anywhere?" "I don't know..." "A scientist's job it to try and make sense of the world around him, but this whole building is crazy." "Blocked exits, Gordian Knot air ducts, a giant box-smashing room." "It doesn't add up." "The only time I feel like I know what I'm doing is when I'm shooting or breaking things." "No wonder we spend so much money making missiles." "I thought today's experiment might work, but instead we blew up everything." "That's what we do." "Man, fighting in this vent is kind of cramped." "It reminds me of that Jackie Chan movie where he fights some dude under a train car." "That must have been hard." "SURPRISE!" "Yo, security, WAKE UP!" "Yeah, little slow, buddy." "That other guy below us is way faster than you!" "Guard:" "Hey, don't count on the cavalry finding us down here." "Head for the surface!" "Yeah, what do you think I've been doing, Gomer?" "Standing around picking my nose?" "Guard:" "The elevators are out of order, but we can still climb." "Yeah, tell that to your dead co-workers." "I found a few of them in the vents." "OH GOD!" "Oh, man." "I thought I almost fell for that turret gun again." "Because this stairway looks EXACTLY like that other one." "I still don't understand why" "AHH!" "AH!" "See I was READY for that." "You can't teach this." "Let's face it, not everyone is cut out to be me." "I'm a physics crunching badass." "I'm the complete package." "Oh, HEY HEY!" "Can you open this door up?" "Why is he adjusting his tie?" "OH, it must be a one-way mirror." "I can't say I'm surprised by that anymore." "We're a monument to misspending." "I wonder if the CEO just rubs himself with money." "WHOA!" "That guy's got some moves." "Yeah see, your form sucks!" "Aw man!" "Why'd you have to kill that guy?" "He's the only cool person I've seen." "Anyone who'll dive through a window at his age is cool in my book." "Grandpa was a fighter." "Ohhh!" "More grenades!" "I think two will do me." "I'd test one right now, but I don't wanna level the building until I'm out of it." "Why is it so hard to get out of the building?" "It's like EVERYWHERE I TURN, there's another obstacle I have to dance around." "I bet there's spikes at the bottom of this shaft." "There may as well be." "Oop, got another dangler." "I bet somebody's wishing they could do a pull-up right about now." "Man, you have to be out of shape not to do one pull-up." "You'd think that elevator shaft would get the adrenaline going." "It does with me, and I'm not the one about to die." "Yeah, that the nice thing about staying fit in an academic field- you can beat up most of your co-workers if you have to." "Yeah, see I can do a pull-up." "ALRIGHT!" "Fucker..." "Okay, well..." "Hey, hey!" "Snack machine." "Gimme some Doritos!" "What is this?" "Plexiglass?" "Alright, alright." "I've got some change." "B-6" "*eating chips*" ""Nacho Cheesier"..."