"( theme music playing )" "( Middle Eastern music playing )" " ( music stops )" " FOOD, MORE FOOD, I'M RUNNING OUT OF FOOD." "WHAT KIND OF A HOTEL IS THIS?" " ( knocks on door )" " THAT'S THE ROOM SERVICE." "( chuckles )" "GOOD AFTERNOON." "I'M BILL BAMFORD," "PRESIDENT OF THE RAMAT-AMERICAN OIL COMPANY." " I'D LIKE TO SEE PRINCE SULLY." " COME IN, MR. BAMFORD." "GOOD AFTERNOON, YOUR MAJESTY." "IT'S A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU." "I'M HERE TO WELCOME YOU TO THE UNITED STATES." "THANK YOU." "YOUR MAJESTY, MY COMPANY FEELS THAT IF YOU COULD GET TOGETHER" "MR. BAMFORD, PLEASE, I WILL DISCUSS ANYTHINGYOU WISH" "AS SOON AS I HAVE FINISHED MY LUNCH." " AND THAT WILL BE..." " ..." "IN ABOUT FOUR HOURS." "( knocks on door )" " DO YOU WANT SOME HELP?" " NO.IT'S A REFRIGERATOR, YOUR HIGHNESS." "OH, UH, PUT IT IN THE CORNER, PLEASE." "TELL ME, ARE ALL YOUR AMERICAN GIRLS LIKE THAT?" "NO, YOUR HIGHNESS, SOME ARE REDHEADS AND BRUNETTES." "WHY DON'T YOU MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME?" "UH, PUT YOUR COAT IN THE CLOSET." "THANK YOU, YOUR HIGHNESS." "THIS IS 86 CALLING CONTROL." "THIS IS 86 CALLING CONTROL." "COME IN, CONTROL." "HELLO, CHIEF?" "MAX." "I'M IN THE PRINCE'S HOTEL ROOM." "WE THINK THERE'S A PLOT AFOOT TO KIDNAP HIM SO DON'T LET HIM OUT OF YOUR SIGHT." "I'VE CHECKED OUT EVERY CORNER OF THE HOTEL" "AND THERE ARE ABSOLUTELY NO SUSPICIOUS CHARACTERS ANYWHERE." "( grunts )" "( grunts, screams )" "CARLA, THE UNIFORM." "CARLA, HELP ME WITH HIM." "I'LL KEEP MY EYE ON HIM EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF THE TIME, CHIEF." "I ONLY HAVE ONE MESSAGE TO REPORT" ""DON'T WORRY." REPEAT: "DON'T WORRY."" " WHAT'S HE DOING NOW?" " HANG ON, CHIEF, I'LL SEE." "CHIEF, ABOUT THAT MESSAGE I JUST GAVE YOU" "CHANGE IT TO "WORRY."" "REPEAT: "WORRY."" "( theme music playing )" "MAX, TRY TO THINK HARD." "WHAT HAPPENED IN THAT HOTEL ROOM?" "HOW DID SULLY DISAPPEAR?" "THERE MUST BE SOME CLUE THAT YOU OVERLOOKED." "I'VE TOLD YOU, CHIEF-- NOTHING UNUSUAL HAPPENED IN THE HOTEL ROOM," "EXCEPT THAT THE PRINCE NEVER STOPPED EATING" " FROM THE MOMENT I ENTERED." " OF COURSE HE DIDN'T," " HE'S TRYING TO GAIN 35 LBS.!" " OF COURSE" " WHY?" " MAX, LOOK, THIS IS RAMAT, THE PRINCE'S COUNTRY." "EVERY YEAR HIS FOLLOWERS GIVE HIM HIS WEIGHT IN GOLD." "THAT'S THE MONEY THAT KEEPS THEIR COUNTRY SOLVENT!" "OH, SO IT'S THE SURVIVAL OF THE FATTEST." "A LITTLE PLAY ON WORDS." "IF THE PRINCE DOESN'T WEIGH 300 LBS...." " NO GOLD." " AND A NEW FACTION TAKES OVER THE GOVERNMENT," "A FACTION THAT HAS ALREADY DEMONSTRATED ITS UNFRIENDLINESS TO THE UNITED STATES." "WELL, CHIEF, THEN THAT MEANS THAT RAMAT'S OIL SUPPLY TO THE UNITED STATES" " WILL BE CUT OFF." " THAT'S THE PICTURE." "WELL, THEN, IF THE PRINCE HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED..." "WHY, THEY'LL BE TRYING TO REDUCE HIM." "THAT'S RIGHT." "WE HAVE EXACTLY 48 HOURS TO FIND HIM," "BRING HIM BACK AND FATTEN HIM UP FOR THE WEIGH-IN." "NOW, MAX, TRY TO THINK HARD." "ISN'T THERE SOME LITTLE SOMETHING" "THAT HAPPENED IN THAT HOTEL ROOM THAT YOU MAY HAVE FORGOTTEN?" "SORRY, CHIEF." "I'M AFRAID I'LL JUST HAVE TO SUBMIT MYSELF..." " TO THE GRILL TEAM." " THE GRILL TEAM?" "BUT THEY'RE ONLY USED TO GET INFORMATION OUT OF ENEMY AGENTS." "WE'VE NEVER USED THEM ON OUR OWN MEN." "I KNOW, CHIEF, BUT IF THEY CAN GET INFORMATION OUT OF THE ENEMY," "THEN MAYBE THEY CAN GET SOMETHING OUT OF ME." "MAYBE THERE'S AN IMPORTANT CLUE" "LOCKED IN MY UNCONSCIOUS MIND." "( grunts )" "AGENT 86, YOU MUST REMEMBER SOMETHING." "WATER, WATER" " I'VE GOTTA HAVE SOME WATER." " HERE, MAX.THIS'LL HELP." "DON'T GIVE ME ANY WATER, CHIEF!" "HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO BREAK DOWN AND TALK?" "SORRY, MAX, I JUST CAN'T THINK OF YOU AS AN" " AS AN ENEMY AGENT." " ( pants )" "THERE MUST BE SOMETHING," "THERE MUST BE SOMETHING UNUSUAL THAT I MISSED." "PLEASE HIT ME JUST ONCE MORE." "BUT, MAX, I CAN'T." "MY HAND'S BEGINNING TO HURT." "PLEASE, ONCE MORE, FOR CONTROL." "MAX, THINK VERY CLEARLY" "DID ANYTHING UNUSUAL HAPPEN IN THE HOTEL ROOM?" "I'VE TRIED TO TELL YOU 100 TIMES, CHIEF" "NOTHING UNUSUAL HAPPENED!" "THE PRINCE WAS SITTING ON THE SOFA;" "AND THE HAREM GIRL;" "AND THE BODYGUARD WAS SERVING THE FOOD;" "AND THE CHAMBERMAID CARRIED IN THE REFRIGERATOR." "All three:" "THE CHAMBERMAID CARRIED IN THE REFRIGERATOR?" "HOLD IT, CHIEF, I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING UNUSUAL." "THE CHAMBERMAID CARRIED IN THE REFRIGERATOR." "THE CHAMBERMAID WITH SUPERSTRENGTH" "( snaps fingers ) OF COURSE, MARY "JACK" ARMSTRONG." "RIGHT.WHO?" "MARY JACK ARMSTRONG, THE STRONGEST FEMALE COUNTERSPY IN THE WORLD." "MAX, YOU'VE GOT TO BE ESPECIALLY CAREFUL." "SHE IS GORGEOUS AND DEADLY." "SO AM I." "YES, SLIP ON THIS COAT, MR. SMART." "NOW, LOOK LOOK LOOK" "( chuckles ) WE'VE SEWN A HOMING DEVICE IN THIS SHOULDER." "I'LL TURN IT ON BY PRESSING THE BUTTON." "IT WILL LET US KNOW WHERE YOU ARE AT ALL TIMES." "OH, YOU MEAN I JUST DO THIS." "OH, NOW YOU'VE TURNED IT OFF." "LEAVE IT OFF, MAX, UNTIL YOU FIND OUT WHERE THE PRINCE IS." " THEN ACTIVATE IT, AND WE MOVE IN." " RIGHT, CHIEF." "AND HERE IS A NEW NECKTIE FOR YOU, MR. SMART." "AN AVOCADO TIE WITH A GREY SUIT?" "WELL, I SUPPOSE THIS WILL MAKE ME #11." " #11?" " YES, CHIEF." "I AM ONE OF THE 10 BEST-DRESSED SPIES IN THE COUNTRY." "OH, NO NO NO, THIS IS A VERY POPULAR SHADE AMONG SCIENTISTS," "AND IT'S NO ORDINARY TIE." "IT'S ACTUALLY A CONTAINER." "NOW THIS LIQUID IS A NEWLY-DEVELOPED" "INSTANT TRUTH SERUM." " POUR IT IN LIKE THIS..." " ( trickling )" "THE LIQUID GOES THROUGH THE TUBE IN THE BACK OF THE TIE," "AND WHEN YOU TURN" "THE SPIGOT ON THE CLASP," "THE LIQUID FLOWS OUT." "( whistles )" "IF YOU CAN GET THIS SERUM INTO SOMETHING THAT MARY JACK ARMSTRONG WILL DRINK," "YOU CAN FIND OUT IMMEDIATELY WHERE SHE'S GOT THE PRINCE CAPTIVE." "BUT YOU ONLY HAVE ABOUT 15 SECONDS TO QUESTION HER" " BEFORE SHE'LL LOSE CONSCIOUSNESS." " GOT YA, CHIEF." "CHIEF, DID YOU MAKE MY HOTEL RESERVATIONS?" "YES, YOU HAVE THE SAME ROOM THE PRINCE OCCUPIED." "I THINK YOU'LL BE ABLE TO CONTACT THEM FROM THERE." "THE HOTEL IS ONLY TWO BLOCKS FROM HERE," "SO IF ANYTHING GOES WRONG WE'LL BE THERE WITHIN A MINUTE." "NOW, MAX, THIS IS A DANGEROUS ONE." "THIS WOMAN IS RUTHLESS AND A POTENTIAL KILLER." "YOU'LL BE RISKING YOUR LIFE EVERY MOMENT." "AND..." "LOVING IT." "IT'S IMPERATIVE WE CONTINUE TO REDUCE THE PRINCE'S WEIGHT" "FOR ANOTHER 48 HOURS." "BY THAT TIME NOTHING WILL HELP." "I'M GOING DOWNSTAIRS TO SEE WHAT SMART IS UP TO." "( knocks on door )" "COME IN." "WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE THIS, SIR?" "I'M AFRAID YOU'VE MADE A MISTAKE." "I DIDN'T ORDER ANY CHAMPAGNE." "WELL, IT'S COMPLIMENTS OF THE HOTEL" " YOU ARE OUR ONE-MILLIONTH GUEST." "OH, REALLY?" "I DIDN'T KNOW THE HOTEL WAS THAT BIG." "IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO FOR YOU, SIR?" "UH... ( grunting ) YOU DON'T HAPPEN TO HAVE..." " A CORKSCREW, DO YOU?" " OH, I'LL DO IT FOR YOU, SIR." "HERE YOU ARE." "IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE I CAN DO?" "OH, WELL, AS LONG AS YOU'RE HERE," "WHY DON'T YOU HAVE A DRINK WITH ME?" "I HAVE NO ONE ELSE TO DRINK WITH." "IT WOULD BE MY PLEASURE, SIR." "THERE YOU ARE." "I DON'T BELIEVE I CAUGHT YOUR NAME." " MARY." " MARY.AH!" ""MARY" IS A GRAND OLD NAME." "WELL, MARY, HERE'S TO YOUR STRENGTH" "UH, YOUR HEALTH." " THANK YOU, MR...." " OH, I'M SORRY." "UH..." "BILL BAMFORD," " PRESIDENT OF THE RAMAT- AMERICAN OIL COMPANY." " I'VE SEEN MR. BAMFORD." "HE'S A TALL 60-YEAR-OLD MAN WITH GREY HAIR." " HE WAS A GUEST INTHEHOTELONCE." " OH." "WELL, HOW ABOUT FRED LAMISTER, MUNITIONS?" " I THINK I'VE SEEN HIM." " OH." "HARRY SCHLURB, TOY MANUFACTURER?" " WELL..." " MERVIN GRIBBS, CALLING- CARD MANUFACTURER?" " I'VE NEVER MET THE MAN." " AH!" "THEN MEET MERVIN GRIBBS." "HERE, LET ME FILL YOUR GLASS FOR YOU." "HERE WE ARE." "OOPS, I'M TERRIBLY SORRY." "COULD YOU GET A TOWEL FOR ME, PLEASE?" "OH, YES." "( fizzing )" " HERE YOU ARE, SIR." " OH.THANK YOU VERY MUCH." "OH, THERE YOU ARE." "WON'T YOU SIT DOWN, PLEASE?" "IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG?" "UH, WELL, NO." "UH, THE WINE SEEMS A LITTLE STRONG." "I THINK IT'S TRYING TO ESCAPE." "OH." "1955" "THAT WAS A TURBULENT YEAR." "YOU SEEM TO KNOW A GREAT DEAL ABOUT WINE." "AS A MATTER OF FACT, I SORT OF PRIDE MYSELF" "ON TRYING TO KNOW A LITTLE BIT ABOUT EVERYTHING" "WINE, WOMEN, FOOD." " WHAT ABOUT ART?" " ART?" "I'VE OFTEN WONDERED WHO PAINTED THAT PICTURE ON THE WALL BEHIND YOU." "I'VE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO MAKE OUT THE SIGNATURE." " WHAT PICTURE?" " THERE." "WELL, I'M NOT QUITE SURE," "BUT I THINK IT PROBABLY WAS THE SAME ARTIST" "THAT PAINTED THAT PICTURE OVER THERE IN THE CORNER." "HOW CLEVER OF YOU TO NOTICE." "THEN HE PROBABLY WAS THE SAME ARTIST" "WHO WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT PICTURE OVER THE DESK." " WHAT PICTURE?" " THAT ONE." " DO I HAVE TO LOOK?" " YES." "( scrapes )" " IS IT MY TURN?" " YES." "OKAY." "WELL, SHALL WE DRINK UP?" "WELL, MARY JACK ARMSTRONG," "IT LOOKS LIKE I'VE HAD THE LAST SWITCH." " DOES IT?" " YES." "AND IN EXACTLY FIVE SECONDS, WHEN THAT DRUG TAKES EFFECT," "YOU WILL TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO KNOW." "YOU WILL TELL ME" "MY NAME IS MAXWELL SMART, SECRET AGENT 86," "AND I WAS SENT HERE BY CONTROL TO RESCUE THE PRINCE" "AND FATTEN HIM UP FOR THE WEIGH-IN, AND YOU'LL NEVER GET ANYTHING OUT OF ME." "IT'S WEARING OFF." " WHERE AM I?" " YOU'RE IN MY PRIVATE MASSAGE PARLOR" "AND REDUCING SALON ON THE TOP FLOOR OF THE HOTEL." "WELL, I'LL JUST TAKE A LITTLE RUBDOWN" "AND A FEW LAPS ON THE BIKE" "AND THEN I'M AFRAID I'LL HAVE TO LEAVE." "VERY FUNNY, MR. SMART." "AND DON'T TRY TO GET FREE." "YOU'LL ONLY HURT YOURSELF IF YOU STRUGGLE." "LATER ON WE'LL DISPOSE OF YOU." "IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU'D LIKE TO SAY?" "YES.YOU'RE ALL UNDER ARREST." "MR. SMART, I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND." "YOU ARE MY PRISONER, AND THE ONLY REASON YOU'RE STILL ALIVE" "IS BECAUSE NOW THAT WE KNOW CONTROL IS ON OUR TRAIL" "YOU CAN HELP US TO LEAD THEM DOWN A BLIND ALLEY." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO THE PRINCE?" "MERELY GETTING HIM IN SHAPE FOR THE WEIGH-IN." "CARLA, WHAT IS HIS WEIGHT?" "HE'S DOWN TO 274 LBS." "Max:" "ARE YOU ALL RIGHT, PRINCE SULLY?" "YES, BUT I CAN FEEL MYSELF GETTING THINNER." "WELL, HANG ON, YOUR MAJESTY, AND THINK FAT." "RELEASE HIM." "YOU MAY LOWER YOUR HANDS, MR. SMART." "I CAN'T.MY SHOULDERS ARE LOCKED." "RHONDA, FIX MR. SMART'S SHOULDER." "THERE!" "NOW, MR. SMART, YOU WILL TELEPHONE YOUR CHIEF," "AND YOU WILL GIVE HIM SOME INFORMATION AS TO WHERE YOU ARE" "INFORMATION THAT WILL BE, OF COURSE, TOTALLY FALSE." "AND WHAT IF I REFUSE?" "THEN I SHALL MAKE YOU DO IT." "YOU AND WHO ELSE?" "GOT AN ANSWER FOR EVERYTHING, HAVEN'T YOU?" "TAKE MR. SMART TO THE PHONE." "NOW BE VERY CAREFUL, MR. SMART." "ONE WRONG WORD, AND RHONDA AND CARLA" "WILL SEE THAT IT'S YOUR LAST." "ALL RIGHT, JUST WHAT IS IT YOU WANT ME TO SAY?" "MERELY TELL YOUR CHIEF THAT EVERYTHING IS ALL RIGHT," "YOU'VE DISCOVERED NOTHING SO FAR," "AND YOU WILL CALL HIM BACK IF YOU DO." " HELLO?" " MAX?" " YES, CHIEF." " WHAT'S GOING ON?" "ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?" "I'M FINE, CHIEF." "YOU KNOW ME" " NEVER ANY PROBLEMS." "HE MUST BE IN TROUBLE." "WE JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT YOU'RE DOING A WONDERFUL JOB, MAX," "AND THAT YOU DESERVE A BIG PAT ON THE SHOULDER." " A PAT ON THE SHOULDER?" " THAT'S RIGHT, SMART," "A PAT ON THE SHOULDER." "UH..." "OKAY, CHIEF, AND DON'T WORRY ABOUT A THING." "I don't need any more help on this case than I did on my last case." "PARKER, HOW MANY MEN DO WE HAVE?" " OKAY, WHAT NOW?" " NOTHING." "YOU'RE FREE TO WATCH US REDUCE THE PRINCE, IF YOU LIKE." "CARLA AND I ARE GOING TO TURN THE MACHINE UP ALL THE WAY." "RHONDA WILL TEND TO YOUR NEEDS." "WATCH HIM." "YOU KNOW, IT'S GETTING AWFULLY CHILLY IN HERE." "UH, WOULD YOU MIND IF I PUT ON MY COAT?" "WHY NOT?" "THANK YOU." "AH, THAT FEELS MUCH BETTER." " ( beeping )" " OH, CHIEF, SMART'S SIGNAL JUST WENT ON." "GET A READING ON HIS LOCATION." " WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR?" " HMM?" "WHAT DID I DO WHAT FOR?" "YOU SLAPPED YOUR SHOULDER." " I DID?" " YES," "RIGHT HERE." " IT JUST WENT OFF." " WHAT?" "THE SIGNAL IS GONE!" "YOU MEAN, I JUST PICKED UP AND..." "SLAPPED MY SHOULDER LIKE THIS?" "THERE MUST BE SOMETHING REASON WHY YOU KEEP DOING THIS." "TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH," "IT'S KIND OF A LITTLE NERVOUS HABIT WITH ME." "LOOK, IT'S MY NERVOUS HABIT, NOT YOURS." "( falters ) WHAT DO YOU THINK IT'S HAPPENING?" "( sighs ) I DON'T KNOW." "COULD HE BE PLAYING LEAPFROG?" "THERE WE ARE." "NORTH..." "NORTHWEST." "THERE.THERE. I THINK THIS IS IT." "LISTEN, RHONDA, YOU LOOK LIKE A SENSIBLE GIRL." "I THINK YOU AND I CAN MAKE A DEAL." "WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY, MR. SMART?" "YOU LET ME ESCAPE" "AND I'LL SEE THAT YOU GET OFF EASY." " HOW EASY?" " WELL, I CAN'T MAKE ANY PROMISES," "BUT I CAN TELL YOU THIS MUCH:" "THE LAW HAS A VERY SOFT SPOT IN ITS HEART" "FOR BIG BEAUTIFUL SPIES." " MARY JACK!" " YES?" "SMART WANTS ME TO HELP HIM ESCAPE." "OH, HE DOES?" "WELL, LOCK HIM IN THE STEAM ROOM" "A LITTLE 150 HEAT OUGHT TO SOFTEN HIM UP." "COME ON!" " GET IN, SMART." " COME ON." "( Carla screams )" "ALL RIGHT, MARY JACK ARMSTRONG," "YOU AND I ARE GONNA TAKE A LITTLE TRIP DOWN TO CONTROL HEADQUARTERS." "YOU DON'T EXPECT ME TO FALL FOR THAT OLD TRICK, DO YOU?" " THERE'S NOTHING IN THERE BUT YOUR HAND." " ALL RIGHT," "GET YOUR HANDS UP AND DON'T MAKE ANY SUDDEN MOVES." "NOW, MR. SMART, I'M GONNA BREAK YOU IN HALF." "WHAT HAPPENED?" "!" "THE OLD FINGER-IN-THE-GUN TRICK." "THAT'S THE SECOND TIME I'VE USED IT THIS MONTH." "PRETTY CLEVER, DON'T YOU THINK?" "ALL RIGHT, MARY JACK, LET'S GO." "INTO THE STEAM ROOM!" "COME ON, MOVE OUT!" "( grunts )" "( sighs )" "WHAT KIND OF A GUN IS THAT, MR. SMART?" "IT'S A .22-CALIBER" "FINGER-- FIRES TWO SHOTS." "( rumbling )" "ALL RIGHT, STAY WHERE YOU ARE." "DON'T ANYBODY MOVE!" "YOUR FINGER'S EMPTY, MR. SMART." "THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE WRONG, MARY JACK." "I STILL HAVE ONE SHOT LEFT." " NO, YOU DON'T." " YES, I DO." "NO, I DON'T." "YOU HAVE BECOME A NUISANCE, MR. SMART." "AND YOU KNOW WHAT I DO WITH NUISANCES?" "YOU IGNORE THEM AND HOPE THEY'LL GO AWAY?" " WRONG." " WRONG." "YOU DON'T IGNORE THEM AND HOPE THEY'LL GO AWAY." "WRONG." " WRONG AGAIN." " I DISPOSE OF THEM" " ONCE AND FOR ALL!" " THAT WAS MY NEXT GUESS." "CARLA, RHONDA." "NOW WAIT A MINUTE, MARY JACK" "COME ON, THE WINDOW." "Chief:" "DROP THAT AGENT!" "TAKE THOSE TWO DOWN TO HEADQUARTERS." "LEAVE HER." " GOOD WORK, MAX." " ( groans )" "THANK YOU, CHIEF, BUT I WISH YOU WOULD BE" "A LITTLE MORE CAREFUL WITH YOUR CHOICE OF WORDS." "YOU KNOW, THEY COULD HAVE DROPPED ME THE OTHER WAY." "SORRY ABOUT THAT, MAX." "LISTEN, CHIEF, I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO WITH MARY JACK." "THERE'S NO PRISON BUILT THAT CAN HOLD HER." "SHE'S THE STRONGEST, TOUGHEST, MOST VICIOUS OPPONENT" "I'VE EVER FACED IN MY ENTIRE LIFE." "HELLO, MARY." "MARY?" "HELLO, THADDEUS." "UM, I'M THE CHIEF NOW." "OH, THAT'S WONDERFUL." "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU'D BEEN PROMOTED." "WELL, OF COURSE WE COULDN'T PUBLISH IT." "I'VE TRIED TO WRITE TO YOU, BUT THE" "WELL, THE ONLY ADDRESS I HAD WAS "CARE OF KAOS."" "WELL, IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME." "YES, IT HAS." "YOU'VE BECOME" "EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL, IF THAT'S POSSIBLE." "AND YOU LOOK RATHER DISTINGUISHED." "WELL, IT'S PROBABLY THE GRAY HAIR." "THAT WILL BE ALL, MAX." " I LIKE IT." " THANK YOU." "UH, MARY, I DON'T MEAN TO PRY," "BUT HOW DID A NICE GIRL LIKE YOU" "EVER GET INTO THIS ROTTEN BUSINESS?" "WELL, THADDEUS, IT'S A LIVING." "THEY KNOW EACH OTHER?" "YES, PRINCE, THAT'S THE WONDERFUL THING" "ABOUT THE ESPIONAGE BUSINESS" "YOU MAKE FRIENDSHIPS THAT LAST FOREVER." "DID THE PRINCE GET BACK TO HIS COUNTRY IN TIME, CHIEF?" "HE MADE IT JUST IN TIME FOR THE WEIGH-IN." "DID HE MAKE THE 300-LB." "MINIMUM?" "OH, HE WEIGHED IN AT EXACTLY 240 LBS." " THEN HE LOST HIS KINGDOM." " NO, THEY GAVE HIM THE GOLD ANYWAY." "HOW COME?" "THE PRINCE WAS IN SUCH GREAT SHAPE PHYSICALLY" "FROM THE REDUCING MACHINE" "THAT THE WOMEN OF RAMAT HAVE MADE HIM A MATINEE IDOL." "YOU'RE KIDDING." "THEIR WHOLE STYLE IS CHANGED." "THE ENTIRE COUNTRY IS ON A CRASH DIET." "THAT'S WONDERFUL, CHIEF." "OH, INCIDENTALLY, THE PRINCE SENT YOU A GIFT" "IN APPRECIATION OF YOUR SERVICES TO HIM AND TO HIS COUNTRY." "THAT'S VERY NICE OF THE PRINCE, CHIEF." "NOW, MAX, YOU KNOW THE POLICY OF CONTROL ON THINGS LIKE THAT." "CONTROL AGENTS ARE NOT ALLOWED TO ACCEPT GRATUITIES." "I KNOW THAT, CHIEF." "DON'T WORRY," "I'LL SEND IT BACK TOMORROW." "( Middle Eastern music playing )" "WOULD YOU BELIEVE THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW?" "( theme music playing )"