"Hey, gorgeous!" "How's it going?" "Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights." "Does it get better than this?" "Question:" "You're not dating, are you?" "I met somebody who would be perfect for you." "You see, perfect might be a problem." "Had you said co-dependent or seIf-destructive... ." "You want a date Saturday?" "Yes, please." "He is cute." "He's funny." "He's" "He's a he?" "well, yeah." "Oh, God!" "I just" "You're nice" " Oh, God." "Good, shelly." "I'm gonna go flush myself down the toilet now." "Okay." "Bye-bye." "The One Where Nana Dies Twice" "english subtitles by GELULA  CO., INC." "It's hard to enjoy Ramen noodles after that." "Is that ridiculous?" "Can you believe she actually thought that?" "When I first met you, I thought maybe..." "... possibIy..." "... youmightbe ." "You did?" "Then you spent Phoebe's birthday party talking to my breasts..." "... sothenIfiguredmaybenot." "Did any of the rest of you guys think that when you first met me?" "I did." "I think so." "Not me." "No, no, me neither." "although back in college, Susan SaIadore did." "You're kidding." "Did you tell her I wasn't?" "No." "It's because I wanted to go out with her too." "So I told her, actually, you were seeing Bernie SpeIIman..." "... whoalsolikedher ." "well, this is fascinating." "So what is it about me?" "I don't know." "Because you're smart, you're funny... ." "So is Ross." "You ever think that about him?" "Yeah, right!" "What is it?" "I don't know." "You just-- You have a quality." "Yes, exactly." "Yeah, a quality." ""A quality. " Good." "I was worried you were gonna be vague about this." "It's PaoIo calling from Rome." "Oh, my God!" "calling from Rome!" "So he's calling from Rome." "I couId do that." "Just gotta go to Rome." "Your Dad just beeped in." "Can you make it quick?" "I'm talking to Rome." "I'm talking to Rome." "Hey, Dad." "What's up?" "Oh, God." "Ross, it's Nana." "How you doing?" "Hey, Dad." "How's she doing?" "The doctor says it's a matter of hours." "How are you, Mom?" "Me?" "I'm fine, fine." "I'm glad you're here." "What's with your hair?" "What?" "What's different?" "Nothing." "Oh, maybe that's it." "She's unbelievable." "Her mother's" "Okay, relax." "We are gonna be here a while, it looks like." "We still have boyfriends and your career to cover." "Oh, God!" "The fuzzy little mints at the bottom of her purse." "Yeah, they were gross." "You know what I Iove?" "Her Sweet 'N Lows." "How she was always stealing them from restaurants." "Not just from restaurants, from our house." "Mrs. geiler?" "She looks so small." "I know." "well, at Ieast she's with Pop-Pop and Aunt PhyIIis now." "Goodbye, Nana." "Bye, Nana." "Nurse!" "What is going on?" "You know how the nurse said Nana had passed?" "well, she's not quite." "What?" "She's not passed!" "She's present!" "She's back!" "What's going on?" "She may have died." ""She may have died" ?" "We're looking into it." "I'II go see." "This almost never happens." "Now she's passed." "I just have to know, okay?" "Is it my hair?" "Yes, that's exactly what it is." "It's your hair." "Yeah, you have homosexual hair." "So did she... ?" "Twice." "Oh, that sucks." "You guys okay?" "I don't know." "It's weird." "I know she's gone, but I just don't feel... ." "Maybe she's not really gone." "No, no, she's gone." "We checked." "A Iot." "No, I mean, maybe no one ever really goes." "Ever since my mom died, every now and then..." "... Igetthisfeelingthat she's, Iike, right here, you know?" "And Debbie, my best friend from junior high..." "... gotstruckby lightning on a miniature golf course." "I always get this strong Debbie vibe..." "... wheneverI use a little yellow pencil." "I miss her." "Here, Pheebs." "Want this?" "Oh, thanks." "Sure." "I just sharpened her this morning." "I don't believe any of that." "I think when you're dead..." "... you'redead." "You'regone." "You're worm food." "So chandler looks gay, huh?" "I don't know who this is, but it's not Debbie." "I thought it'd be a closed casket." "well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice." "Sweetie, you think you can get in there?" "I don't see why not." "Here's my retainer!" "I was just thinking..." "... whenmytimecomes" "Dad!" "Listen to me!" "When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea." "You what?" "I wanna be buried at sea." "It looks like fun." "Define " fun. "" "Come on." "You'II make a day of it." "You'II get a boat, pack a lunch... ." "And then we throw your body in the water." "Gee, that does sound fun." "Everyone thinks they know me." "Everyone says, " Jack geiler, so predictable. "" "Maybe after I'm gone, they'II say, "Buried at sea?" "Huh. "" "That's probably what they'II say." "I'd Iike that." "Hey, gorgeous." "Look, I'm sorry about yesterday." "Don't worry about it." "apparently, other people have made the same mistake." "Okay." "Phew!" "So what do you think it is about me?" "I don't know what." "You just have..." "... aquality." "A quality." "Great." "It's a shame, because you and lowell would've made a great couple." "lowell?" "financial Services LoweII?" "That's who you saw me with?" "What?" "He's cute." "well, yeah." "He's no Brian in payroll." "Is Brian... ?" "I don't know." "The point is, if you were gonna set me up..." "... I'dIiketo thinkit'dbe with somebody like him." "I think Brian's a little out of your league." "Excuse me." "You don't think I couId get a Brian?" "Because I couId get a Brian." "believe you me." "I'm really not." "This one?" "I've shown you every dress we have." "unless you want her to spend eternity in a Iemon-yeIIow pantsuit..." "... gowiththeburgundy." "Whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrong one." "You're right." "We'II go with the burgundy." "A fine choice." "I'm coming out." "Wait!" "We need shoes." "How about these?" "That's really a day shoe." "And where she's going, everyone else will be dressier?" "could we see something in a slimmer heel?" "I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy." "I can show you something in a silver that may work." "No, it really should be burgundy." "unless we go with a different dress." "No, no, no." "Watch this." "Wait, I may have something in the back." "Oh, my God." "Is everything all right?" "Just Nana's stuff." "How we doing?" "You guys ready?" "Mom called to remind me not to wear my hair up." "Did you know my ears were not my best feature?" "Some days it's all I can think about." "Hi!" "I'm sorry I'm late." "I couldn't find my bearings." "You mean your earrings?" "What did I say?" "Are these the shoes?" "Yes." "paolo sent them from italy." "What?" "We don't have shoes here?" "Morning." "We ready to go?" "Don't we look nice all dressed up?" "It's stuff like that, isn't it?" "It was a really beautiful service." "It really was." "Come here, sweetheart." "You know..." "... Ithinkit 'stimefor you  to start using night cream." "What?" "Nothing." "Just your overcoat sounds remarkably like Brent Musburger." "Check it out." "Giants-Cowboys." "You're watching football at a funeral?" "No, it's the pregame." "I'm gonna watch it at the reception." "You're a frightening, frightening man." "Oh, no!" "My new PaoIo shoes!" "I hope they're not ruined." "God, what a great day!" "What?" "Weatherwise." "I know." "The air, the trees." "Even though Nana's gone, there's something almost Iife" "Ross, are you okay?" "No, I'm fine." "Just..." "... havingmyworstfear realized, but... ." "I'm just checking to see if the muscle's in spasm." "What?" "What is it?" "You missed a belt loop." "Okay, it's in spasm." "Here, sweetie." "Here." "I took these when I had my golfing accident." "Thanks, Mom." "Sorry." "Hi, I'm Andrea." "I'm Dorothy's daughter." "Hi, I'm chandler, and I have no idea who Dorothy is." "Look who's up!" "How do you feel?" "I feel great." "I feel great." "I feel great." "Wow, those pills really worked." "Yeah." "Not the first two, but the second two... ." "I Iove you guys." "You guys are the greatest." "I Iove my sister." "I Iove Pheebs." "That's so nice." "I Iove you, man." "And listen, if you wanna be gay, be gay!" "It doesn't matter to me." "You were right." "I Iove you the most." "well, you know who I Iove the most?" "You!" "Oh, you don't get it!" "What do you got there?" "Just a hearing disability." "What's the score?" "1 7-1 4, Giants." "Three minutes to go in the third." "beautiful!" "Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker?" "Your grandmother would've hated this." "well, sure." "What with it being her funeral and all." "No, I'd be hearing about..." "... whydidn'tIget  the honey-gIazed ham." "Or I didn't spend enough on flowers." "If I spent more, she'd say..." "... " Whywasteyourmoney?" "I don't need flowers, I'm dead. "" "That sounds like Nana." "Do you know what it's like to grow up..." "... withsomeonewhoiscritical of every single thing you say?" "I can imagine." "I tell you, it's a wonder your mother turned out..." "... tobethepositive, Iife-affirming person she is." "That is a wonder!" "So tell me something, Mom." "If you had to do it all over again..." "... Imean,if shewas hererightnow..." "... wouldyoutellher ?" "tell her what?" "How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail." "Like your hair, for example." "I'm not sure I know what you're getting at." "would things have been better if you'd just told her the truth?" "I think some things are better left unsaid." "I think it's nicer when people just get along." "More wine?" "Oh, I think so." "Those earrings look really lovely on you." "Thank you." "They're yours." "actually, they were Nana's." "Now I'm depressed!" "Even more than I was." "Hey, who's this little naked guy?" "That little naked guy would be me." "Look at the little thing!" "Yes, fine." "That is my penis." "Can we be grownups now?" "Who are those people?" "Got me." "That's Nana right there in the middle." "Yeah, Iet's see." ""Me and the gang at Java Joe's. "" "Monica, you look just like your grandmother." "How old was she there?" "Let's see, " 1 939. "" "Twenty-four, twenty-five." "It looks like a fun gang." "Look, look, look!" "I got Monica naked!" "Let me see!" "No, no." "That would be me again." "I'm just trying something." "Hey, LoweII." "Oh, hey, chandler." "So how's it going in financial Services?" "It's like Mardi gras without the papier-mache heads." "How about you?" "Good." "Good." "Listen..." "... Idon'tknowwhatSheIIytoldyou about me, but..." "... I'mnot." "I know." "That's what I told her." "really?" "So you can tell?" "Pretty much." "Most of the time." "We have a kind of radar." "So you don't think I have..." "... aquality?" "Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no." "By the way, your friend, Brian, from payroll?" "He is." "He is?" "And way out of your league." "Out of my league!" "I couId get a Brian." "If I wanted to get a Brian, I couId get a Brian." "Hey, Brian."