"THE EAR" "BASED ON AN ORIGINAL STORY BY JAN PROCHAZKA" " Put your shoes on." " Leave me alone." "You been bothering me all night, you know." "Hey... wait a moment!" "You can't leave me here without my hat." "Goodbye." " Give me the keys." " Go to hell." "You locked up, I was already in the car." "That's your bad upbringing - leaving before me." "Nothing to be proud of." "They're not here." "I know what I'm doing, I haven't gone mad yet." "I'm sure you put them in your bag" "Are you mad?" "There are people about" "You mean that car parked over there?" "Who would be sitting in a car with the headlights off?" "Do you think there was a bit of hanky-panky going on there?" "Number 117" " And we all fall down" " Enjoy yourselves" "None of your usual "don't drink" rubbish" "You can't boss me around all evening" "Keep your voice down." "You don't have to talk to me at all" "An orange." "Look what I pinched at the party." " Where the hell are those keys?" " How should I know?" "Just for once, can't you cut it out?" "At least for tonight" "If you've got time have a look at the calendar" "Why should I?" "Maybe you'll realise what day it is today" "I mean, for such a clever guy" "They're not here" "So, do something, we can't stay here all night" "We can ring the bell, can't we?" "It's not working." "I've got to pee, or I'll..." " I don't give a damn." " No need to remind me." "I've known for a long time how little you care for me." "I'm not that stupid." "How could you talk to Cejnar all evening?" "You keep saying that he's a moron" "Leaving me standing around like unattended luggage" "I'm looking for Anna." "Wake Ludek up." "The spare keys are in the kitchen." "Now break a window." "We're all idiots, but you are the genius." "Try the laundry room window." "He's out like a light." "Why did you climb over the gate?" "It was open." "Can't you get rid of that stupid thing?" "So you noticed me." " What was open?" " I've forgotten what it's called." "Something you go through to get to the garden." "Rubbish." "I haven't heard that from you for ages." "I knew I was missing something." "How else could I have got here?" "Over the fence?" "In this dress?" "Use your loaf!" "Klepac came back from Moscow two days ago." "The blinds have been down the whole time till today." "There was still no sign of them, even today." "At least when he comes back the missus knows she'll be catered for." "Don't pull the washing line!" "Blast it!" "They gave us a wonderful reception in Brno..." " In Bratislava..." "Kosic..." " Kosice." "They gave us a wonderful reception there." "When it's cold, comrade deputy minister when it's minus 20 or 30 degrees can you lay concrete?" "He's asking if we can lay concrete when it's very cold" "I understand." "What a nation." "Wouldn't let a soldier take a break!" " We can't lay concrete when it's so cold." " Dreadful." "And the civic leader of Plzen..." "Plzen - beer!" "We can lay concrete in heavy frost." "You must come and see." " Where were you born?" " In Mohelnice." "It's a town in a province called Kana." " Mohelnice is a village, isn't it?" " It's a town!" "You must come." "You must" "You don't have a minister for construction right now?" "Of course, we have one." "Comrade Kosara is our minister" "Our comrades told me you don't have a minister right now" " He should be around somewhere" " He excused himself" "He excused himself?" "Allow me to make a toast" "Soldiers and Czechs alike, present arms!" "He's blown the fuse again!" "I'd be interested to see if you tell him off!" "Did he tell you what he did to the radio?" "Yeah." "When?" "When was the last time you saw him?" "A week ago" "If someone's spoiling him, it's you" "Rascal!" "What a bloody mess!" "They'd have to be hanging here for me to find them." "Is it going to take you all night?" "How should I know where the keys are?" " They're hanging on the hook" " Crap" " Where else could they be?" " I have no idea" "How come it's unlocked?" "A moment ago it was still locked." "Like the gate!" "Can't you even tie your own shoelaces?" "What were you up to?" "I thought you were fixing the fuse" "It's not the fuse, it's a power cut" "But I saw you locking up" "And the key is inside" "When we go out he always gets up to mischief" "I told you, his mates are always over" "They've probably been mucking around in the house" "He wouldn't have left the key in the lock" "He would have hung it up so we couldn't find it" "So it must have been the Holy Ghost" "Ask him in the morning." "He might tell you what he was up to" "He's due a good thrashing." "Don't drink vodka from the bottle!" " You know who does that, don't you?" " Yes." "Can't you use a glass?" "I'm a publican's daughter, my boy!" "You should have got used to it by now." "Our comrade President also drinks from the bottle." "Sorry, the comrades don't sleep, they are listening!" "The meat will be off by morning" "These are my keys!" "Your keys were hanging in the kitchen!" "I locked up with mine" "I'll give him one for bringing his mates here" "Shall I put the meat on the window sill?" "It's warm outside." "Take it down to the cellar and put it on the floor." "It's still cold." "They must have only turned off the power a little while ago." "Look, the lights are on at the Klepac's!" "How could they have turned off only our electricity?" "It could be the fuse outside." "Where's the torch?" "Can't you ever keep anything in its place?" "I've got everything in place." "But I'm not sure you have." "It's about time I brought a little light into your life!" "Drink up, my son, down it in one..." "They know how to put it away." "What did you discuss at the cabinet meeting?" " Did you go through our report?" " You're not drinking?" "Our people are growing in strength!" "It's all the same whether they're Catholic or Muslim" "All that counts is whether they accept socialist goals" "Isn't that true, comrade minister?" "I went to see Marecek at the factory" "He had a picture of the Virgin Mary on his machine" "Next to his best worker's flag" "The Party chairman says he doesn't know what to do with him" ""Be broad-minded", I said" "Did we win the revolution or not?" "As long as a person accepts our socialist goals..." "Let him pray if he thinks it's good for him" "But we don't have to write about that in the papers" "We're not going to be heavy-handed about it" "I'm glad you're of the same opinion" "But it's only Tuesday" "Government sessions are on Thursdays" "But they summoned Kosara" "They phoned to tell him to come straight away" "I don't like standing near the..." "Don't you know what happened to Kosara?" " What's up with Kosara?" " Didn't they speak to you?" "Who?" "Excuse me, I have to speak to the Parliament leader" "See how he serves the food?" "None of them is a trained waiter, they're all spies!" "Give me a bit of salmon" "It's that red stuff over there" "They took him in!" "And Tondl, Klepac and Slesinger too!" "But why Kosara?" "Because his real name is Karpeles" "He was scared to do anything on his own" "We had to force him to sign that brickworks report!" "I'd keep that to myself if I were you" "Make sure you get rid of all the papers." "You might get your fingers burnt." " But why me?" " Just in case." "This is the surplus plan!" "Anna is looking for you." "Do you hear me, Ludvik?" "I'm looking for Anna." "You could wash the dishes some time." "I may, some time." "Put the meat on the floor." "I'll break his legs." "Where are you?" "What are you doing here?" "I'm running a bath." "The tank is full of hot water." "They must have only switched it off a little while ago." "What are you doing with those boxes?" "Where did we put all my papers?" "Those black books with my notes in?" "What do you need your notes for?" "I kept notes when I was working at the Secretariat." "I once read it to you in bed, remember?" "That's practically all you do to me in bed." "How could I remember?" "It's been nothing but brickworks for the past six months." "I know all the brickworks in the country." "There'll be no reading tonight." "Put theory into practice!" "At least once a week, even if it's bleak!" " Give me the torch" " Don't step on the custard!" "How come the phone isn't working?" "It should be working even with the power cut" "If a government phone won't work, what will?" "Who on earth are you phoning at this time of night?" "You shouldn't care who I ring anyway" "For Christ's sake, stop sighing." "It really gets on my nerves!" "No need to sigh because of me!" "I'm phoning for a man, if you want to know!" "Well, I don't!" "Didn't we put it all in my suitcase?" "The old one I used to have at Technical College in Brno" " I threw it away ages ago" " Just like you" "But there was nothing in it." "I've never lost anything of yours" "All you've ever lost, you've lost by yourself" "With me, you only lost your virginity" "Towels are for hands, not dishes!" "I'll write it on the wall for you" "Do you want something to eat?" "Where did you put those things from the case?" "All I remember is what happened today ten years ago" "What happened?" "See, something you don't remember!" "Actually, I tried to phone Klepac's wife." "They must have people round." "All the lights are on." "I brought her some stuff from the government shop." "She'd already paid for it." "Smoked salmon and four boxes of cheese." "They love cheese." "The manager asked me to take them for her..." "So he wouldn't have to deliver it specially." "Maybe she came to get it while we were out." "They might have been at the reception." "Maybe in the special lounge reserved for the President." "Tondl's wife said Klepac was going to be a minister." "Why did you close it?" "What did I say this time?" "Did I say anything wrong?" " Don't shout" " I can hardly hear myself talking" "At least tell me what I can talk about" "When can I talk normally?" "You said the kitchen, the bathroom and the bog were OK" "What about the President becoming a granddad?" "Is that classified information too?" "Can the Ear hear that?" "Listen, Ear:" "Comrade President is a granddad." "It's a boy." "Everything's fine." "The mother, unfortunately, hasn't got enough milk." "Come here." "Sit down." "Sit down." "I've got to tell you something." "Another little chat, what about this time?" "Didn't you get enough chance at the party?" "I don't want to hear about government mistakes now." "And I don't want you reading to me today." "What the hell was in that glass?" "Must have been the stuff I rub on my ankles." "Ten years ago, it was also the 17th of July." " Is it the 17th already?" " Every year, there's a 17th of July." "Every year it is only me who remembers." "Too bad." "But the phone was working earlier." "Jindrich phoned to say he'd be a bit late." "It was working." "Cepicka phoned me." "She wanted to know if the house is warm enough in winter." "Markus told her that we were moving." "What an idiot." "The cabinet housing official is an idiot!" "Do you have to keep up with your daily ranting?" "As long as you don't." "Undo this, will you?" "That tickles." "Comrades, we're going to bed." " Hi, Bedrich." " You're here?" "Why wouldn't I be?" "I thought that..." "Since so many people have gone away, I thought you..." "But I phoned you this morning about that report." "Yes, so you did." "Sorry, I've had so much on recently." "I'm looking for Marie." "Have you seen her?" "Aren't you getting undressed?" "Just in time, we would have been flooded." "Aren't you coming?" "In a minute." "Ludvik, my old mate." "I'm only friendly with those who they're after." "Number 117." " This is not my car." " It is, comrade deputy." "This isn't Jindrich." "You're not Jindrich, are you?" " We live in Bulharska Street." " I know where to go." " Are you sick?" " A bit." " Is it your stomach?" " Yeah." " Shall I make you some coffee?" " No, thanks." "Did Jindrich say anything about not coming to get us?" "No." "Who was it that took us home?" "He drove us all round Prague." "Didn't you tell him where we live?" "Make me some coffee." "You didn't eat any of those prawn sandwiches?" "No, I didn't." "We get this every anniversary." "Get a move on." "You do take your time." "Comrades, let us build up the people's politics from granite." "To throw ourselves into our work will not be an easy task." "Silence, the comrade is speaking!" "I sometimes wonder if I understand anything." "Why not admit it?" "But will the revolution wait?" "That way we couldn't knock the imperialism down." "So I'll make a decision and it will be good." "It wasn't that painful either." "Right now I could just rush back to the factory..." "On Sundays, it would be beer and football." "But we cannot afford to rest, comrades." "It is our mission to topple the world." "But not upside down..." "That's just what the capitalists have done." "Hear, hear." "He's 60, isn't he?" "But still going strong!" "But don't think it's clear to everyone" "They are still among us, those who only call themselves comrades" "Kosara, Tondl, Klepac, Slesinger..." "Kosara doesn't want to close the old brickworks and transfer the workers where they're needed saying that it might cause an imbalance" "No, Mr Kosara!" "An imbalance would occur if we let you and the likes of you attack the Party's principles!" "Do you want some scissors?" "Here's your coffee." "Your bath is getting cold." "Look out of the window." "Is that car still there?" " What car?" " The Party one." "The Party one?" "Well?" "It's the same one that was there before." "They moved it away from the street lamp." "Are they in the car or standing in the street?" "Why would they be standing in the street?" " What are you tearing up?" " Where's the plunger?" "There used to be a plunger here." "You've blocked the toilet!" "You're not going to unblock it, are you?" "Don't shout into their ears!" "Do you have to clear out your case right now?" " Why are you tearing that up?" " Keep quiet!" "Isn't someone banging on the gate?" "Who would be doing that?" "Put something on." "Don't run about naked." "Why should I get dressed?" "I've just got undressed." "Since when has it bothered you?" "Tell me." "You wouldn't mind Konvickova running around naked!" "And now both!" "So what do you say to that about Kosara?" "I just don't know." "But you prepared that report for him, didn't you?" "Kosara wanted to be in charge of everything." "He kept people at a distance." "I..." "We only got him the figures." "But Kosara was good for the job, wasn't he?" " He was a building engineer." " It depends on how you look at it." "He could be very difficult." " Have you heard about Kosara?" " Of course." "Do you understand what is going on?" "I'll call a Party meeting to take a stand." "Of course." " What have you got there?" " Pineapple liqueur and vodka." " Who thought up such slop?" " The comrade." " What is it?" " Open the door." " Why?" " Open the door!" "There is a man in the garden." "He's not moving." "Why are you burning everything?" "Why are you burning this report?" " You slaved over it for six months!" " Careful!" " They can hear everything." " You've burnt the seat!" "We'll suffocate here." "Close it, you idiot!" "Keep quiet!" "They've locked up Kosara." "And Klepac, Tondl and Slesinger." "They got them as soon as they arrived at the party." "They told them to go to that special lounge." "And they took them away." "What did that Cepicka woman say?" "She asked if the house was warm in winter." "What do you want me to burn?" "It doesn't matter now." "It must be a draft in the roof." "The attic window is open." "How can they put a minister in prison?" "They don't discriminate." "Do you have any idea how many are in prison over there?" " Imprisoned and then calmly bumped..." " Where?" "Maybe they just want to ask some questions" "Since I was his first deputy." "Was?" "You aren't a deputy any more?" "Why not?" "Maybe I am." "I don't know any more who is and who isn't." "We could have burnt it in the boiler." " They could see us from there." " We should have stayed in Olomouc." "We should never have moved to Prague." " We were OK there." " That's Ludek's school report!" "I'll put it in your drawer." "So you couldn't say you didn't know about anything." "Why do you always snoop around my things?" "My drawers, pockets and briefcase?" " Do I bother with your things?" " You never bothered about anyone." "You've always only been bothered about yourself." " Where are you going?" " To get dressed." "I'm not running around here as if I were in Hawaii!" "Are you going to spend the night in the toilet?" "He's not in the garden any more." "Can you see him?" "Don't volunteer any information." "Just answer their questions." "Don't tell them that Kosara is Ludek's godfather." "They'd read all sorts of things into that." " You closed the laundry room window?" " Yes." "You didn't." "You didn't close the door either." "There was a draft when I opened the window." "Didn't I put your things in that old medicine cabinet?" "I think I put them into something wooden." "It was in Aunt Bozena's old chest." "So she still hasn't taken her junk away?" "How many times have I told you that her stuff has got to go?" "Where can she put it?" "They took all her property and left her with one room." " Tell her to chuck it all out!" " Chuck out new sewing machines." "They're practically brand new!" "You told her not to sell as money had no value!" "Quiet!" "We can talk here, can't we?" "They didn't put a bug in here." "We told them that we would use it as a nursery." "Klepac's wife said they never put them in nurseries." "When they had guests, they shut themselves away there." "Now they've been shut away for good." "How will we explain all this stuff?" "I should have kicked that old bag out." "I really should have given her the boot!" "You told her yourself that she could put her carpets here." " What the hell is this?" " My petticoat." "Do you think they'll get into our house and into every room?" "They'll get into every corner of the cupboard!" "Do you remember when the comrade walked past you?" "You were standing there with Bilkova and Vagerova" "What did he tell you?" "The comrade knows you, doesn't he?" "You remember the party at his Lany mansion?" "We walked in the grounds and you lost your shoe" "He must remember you." "What did he say?" "I can't remember anything" " He did tell me something" " Can't you remember?" "Try to remember what it was" "Which of our comrades is celebrating a saint's day today?" "Come on, girls!" "Yes!" "I'm celebrating today" "But today isn't Saint Anna's day!" "I'm celebrating my tenth wedding anniversary" "Let's see your ID card then." "We can trust women but we must verify" "I've got the date engraved on my wedding ring" "How did my mother's glasses get into my pocket?" "The 17th of July." "Comrade Anna is not lying!" "Promises must be fulfilled" "I hope you have many offspring in order to increase our ranks!" "Let me wrap those in paper for you." "The vase has to stay here" "The comrade doesn't know about such details" "Did he call you Anna?" " I think so" " Well, yes or no?" " I can't remember." "I was a bit tipsy" " I'll say." "A bit!" "Did it look as if he recognised you?" "If he knows me why shouldn't he recognise me?" " Or is he past it?" " Try and concentrate!" "If he called you Anna and was friendly that would have political significance." "He knows you're my wife and if I were in trouble he wouldn't call you Anna." "He did call me Anna." "Look, there's a third man!" "They've been at the Klepac's place." "We forgot the old adjoining gate behind the compost" "But the gate was wired shut" "We undid it so that we could use it as a short cut" "Klepac's wife and I took turns cooking" "Do you think that they'll make her move out?" "Will they give her a flat if he's behind bars?" "I don't know what he did with the report in the end." "He did the final editing himself." "You know how he reacted to things." "I told you that we didn't always see eye to eye." " Who do you mean?" " Kosara." "But he thought highly of you, didn't he?" "Only when I agreed with him" "I told you about the row we had at that meeting" "No, you didn't" "I hardly knew Klepac, Tondl and Slesinger" "You're right." "It must have been mutual" "They're stealing our radishes." "At least he left the cabbage" " Where did he get the key from?" " The key is not a problem" "Isn't it just gossip about Klepac and Kosara?" "Who told you about it?" "We're mucking about while our comrades are probably getting 40 winks together" "Those yobs were probably living it up next door" "Do you have to keep on?" "Can't you ever let up?" " Didn't we put my things in the garage?" " Don't talk to me!" "Do you have to clean the holy seat right now?" "I like to see what I'm sitting on" "There are only the things from the pub in the garage" " I'd have to wear armour to sit on this" " In my army case?" " Where is my army case?" " I don't know." "I was never in the army" "I wonder where it is?" "Get the phone!" "That's not the phone" " Is it the gate?" " Yes, it is" "Don't turn the light off." "They'll notice" "Close the door, will you?" "Ludvik, Ludvik." "Don't cry." "Don't cry, please." "What will happen to us?" "To Ludek and I?" "I'll go and let them in." "Don't worry, nothing will happen to you." "Hide the savings books and your jewellery." "They'll search everything." "You'll need some money." "But you didn't do anything!" " I know you didn't!" " So you know what to do?" "Where shall I put it?" "Put it in Ludek's school bag." " Someone's ringing the bell." " Yes, just go back to sleep." "Go to the window and tell them that I'm just coming so that they stop that infernal ringing!" "He's coming." "I give you my word of honour that I didn't do anything." " Is he coming or not?" " He's just staring." "So tell him not to stare." "I put some things in your case." " His old woman is with him." " Don't come with me." "I put in your pyjamas and some shirts and socks." "Please... go back." "I just pressed the bell and it kept on ringing." "Do you always have trouble with the stupid thing?" "No, never." "But it could have happened" "I must have pressed it too hard" "We didn't need to ring." "Are these your keys?" "That small one is for the house, isn't it?" "Yes, I think they are ours." "My wife must have lost them somewhere" "We said that we'd bring them." "You left them there" " Standa told us to, but..." " He didn't survive the journey" "Pick him up so that his private parts don't catch cold!" "This is Ludvik, my best friend" "He's a minister, you clowns!" "And these are my best... schoolmates." " No, my best workmates!" " Careful." "No names." "Yes, all members of authority have pseudonyms." "They're writers." "The Brothers Grimm!" "Comrade Gibulka!" "Stay in that chair." " Comrade Kopackova!" " Don't you recognise me?" "Remember, we used to pick up girls in the army" "You climbed in through that window" "And I shacked up with that fast piece at the station" "It's me, Standa" "OUR COUNTRY WILL BE BEAUTIFUL AND AFFLUENT" "You'll sit next to the comrade" "Do you remember going to that bash?" "Wasn't it great going to a dance by tank!" "Sorovoviska!" " Could I buy more of these prints?" " Of course" "Come and have a drink of dynamite cocktail" "My wife is looking for me" "I'll take you somewhere where she won't be able to find you" "See that one over there with the boobs?" "She's enough to make you cry." "Meet my commander." "Hi." "Plum brandy should be old, but your wife should be young" "He was the greatest comedian in the world!" "Then we all got married and the cage door shut!" "Has the comrade gone?" "He went off to show the new ambassador Prague by night" "But I've lined up people for a photo session" "Do you want me to take the picture for you?" " Put a clean cloth on the table" " The laundry is still drying" " Haven't we got a clean table cloth?" " No" "I hope we didn't disturb you, comrade?" " Haven't we met before?" " I doubt it" "Make some coffee, will you?" "And get that brandy I brought back from Moscow" "Annie, give us the best brand of brandy..." "I remember her coming to visit you in the army" "We had to hunt you down when you were shacking up with that skinny bird" "What did you kick me for?" "I know how to behave in company" "Can we smoke here?" "Where are the sewage works around here?" "I have to make an inspection" "Can you get up these stairs?" "The one downstairs is blocked" "Take it easy." "I've also got a dragon at home" "A real old vampire" "How did they know those were our keys?" "Why did they come?" " Is this a pub or what?" " He can hear you" "I want him to hear me." "Throw them out!" "Is there or is there not a bottle standing there?" "Did lightening strike your bog?" "How come the seat caught fire?" "Come and wash your hands" "I left my jacket in there" "Drink up." "The comrade deputy needs his sleep" "There's no need to rush, boys" "It's only 8:30pm in Australia." "One for the road" "Cheers!" " Let's go, gentlemen" " So soon?" "We can't accept those, comrade" "Ludvik's great!" "I told you he's a brilliant guy" "If you see some guys hanging about, they are ours" "We did over next door." "You heard Klepac, didn't you?" "Yes, I did" "Maybe the security guys are still there." "Did you see anyone in the garden?" " No." "In the garden?" " They've probably called it a day" "Bye, guys!" "These are the best looking girls from Broumov" "Well built, aren't they?" "You don't think they're held up by scaffolding?" "Give him his award" " We've brought you this from Broumov" " It's upside down" "So you can take some good measurements at home" " Careful, the colour will wear off" " Where is this comrade from?" "From our office." "She's game for anything" "They've locked her husband up for opening his big mouth" "We finally got her to divorce him." "You should come and visit us" "Did you have to give them the cake?" "You would have given our house away!" "You stuff those louts with our anniversary cake!" "Forget the flaming cake" "I'm just happy things turned out the way they did" "You can clear up this mess." "I won't touch anything" "I wouldn't expect you to" "If I want to eat off a clean plate, I must buy it first" "I'll buy you two cakes in the morning." "Go and change" "I'm in no mood to play the scarlet woman" "What did they say about Kosara and Klepac?" "Why should they say anything?" "They must have told you why they took them in" "Didn't you ask them anything?" "I'll get you your things." "Where's your nightie?" "At least one of you has to ask about Kosara" "At least ask what has become of him!" "Let the Ear hear this" "Always having to shut the door!" "Not even gypsies have to make love in the kitchen!" "Not even the Hottentots do it on the floor!" "We can go in the bedroom" "I don't like being recorded when I'm enjoying myself" "If they took Kosara's wife, they'll have to let her go." "She's got children" "Who would look after them?" "She hasn't got anyone in Prague" "This is the last one" "Kosara didn't want to submit the report." "You should tell someone" " That would be a long story" " Let's talk then." "We can't sleep anyway" "Do I have to waffle on about it with you too?" "Do I worry about your plans?" "Where are my pills?" " Have you seen my pills?" " They wouldn't work for me anyway" "Don't play the poor boy with me" "How often have I lain awake with you snoring away?" "Why are you looking at me like that?" "How should I know why they took them in?" "Did I inform on Kosara?" "They could just as easily have taken me" "How do I know what order they do things in?" "But while Kosara's inside, they come here to live it up" "You know what?" "Yeah." "I shouldn't finish this bottle" "Because Ludek shouldn't see me in this state" "I remember all you've told me in the past ten years" " It's only ten sentences anyway" " Get stuffed" "Which makes it nine now" "Hey!" "That cigarette is mine" "Who's there?" " Who the hell are you phoning?" " I tried Kosara's wife" "Some man answered" "He used the other phone to call the operator to find out who was calling" "They'll think I phoned Kosara!" "No, they won't." "The Ear is listening!" "Why would you want to call him if he's inside?" "You're a big help!" "Put that down!" "That was not my husband phoning, it was me!" "You said Kosara needed you in Prague" "The truth is nobody wanted you in Olomouc" "You couldn't tell me where my pyjamas are?" "Where you last left them." "In the bathroom, I suppose" "They're not in the bathroom" "Don't look for them in my bed!" "Take the clean ones I gave you for the prison" "Are we going to bed or will you keep on preaching?" "Leave me alone." "I'm just talking to myself" " You know who does that?" " The comrade" "Kosara came to protect you" "He gave you the job because the Secretariat pressed him to" "God knows who else pressed him on your behalf" "Kosara was a little afraid of you, wasn't he?" "It must have taken you a long time to think all this up" "Did you think all this up on your own?" "Klepac didn't like you, either." "He was clever." "He wrote books" "Why have they never invited us over?" "Why, I wonder" "Klepac was also afraid of you" "Good night" "Do you know why they are all afraid of you?" "You leave a trail of corpses behind you." "All you care about is yourself" "You don't even care about your own brother!" "You didn't even tell personnel you had a brother because he was in England" "Help, he's beating me again!" "Comrades, help me!" "Do you want me to hit you?" "Remember how you danced for President Benes?" "All the way from the station to the hotel!" "And just for a change, you sang for Gottwald as well" "You sang all night until your voice was hoarse" "You would join any movement, of the right or left just to scrape your way to the top!" "That's right." "Just slap me." "You're good at that!" "You get drunk and start rambling on" "I know what I'm rambling about." "It suits you that I drink" "Haven't you got a hanky?" "You're counting on me drinking myself to death" "One day you'll dump me in a loony bin" "That's what comrades do, don't they?" "Even comrade Stalin" "Cut out this lunacy!" "But it's me who always gets your brother out of trouble" "Who got him out of that jam?" "He'd still be doing a nice long sentence!" "So he would." "But you wouldn't be doing what you're doing now" "Stop pretending that you're doing people favours" "You're not putting me under cold water." "I'll have a cold for ten days!" "Do you want to go on bleeding all night?" "Remember how the bed looked last time?" " Bend down." "If you don't, it will hurt" " Bastard!" "Is that how a teacher talks?" "The school threw you out after two days" "Take a look at yourself" "This is how I look after ten years with you!" " So why did you marry such a bastard?" " You'll never understand" "But I'll tell you why you married me." "Let me go!" " Only if you bend down" " I'll be all wet!" "Bend down or I'll break your arm" "Why didn't you marry Jitka?" "You had such a crush on that virgin!" "Why did you marry me?" "I'd slept with a whole football team!" "You knew that!" "Remember when I slept with you?" "When Jirka stood me up!" "Shut up!" "My father owned a house with a pub" "He told everyone what dowry I'd get" " To marry off his little whore!" " Shut up!" "It's cold!" "You bastard!" "You shit!" "To save your career, you didn't even break Jitka in!" "You wanted my money to set up a building firm!" "You didn't tell them you owned the firm!" " Please, stop!" " Only when you sober up!" " I'll drown you!" " You'd never do it" "You didn't even manage to keep the firm going" "Luckily, the coup of '48 brought you into politics" "Unlike many others, you're a failure at it!" "It's a good thing you're competent!" "Using the car for shopping, the hairdresser's" "They all know you sent the driver out for blueberries!" "I'll look really shitty now!" "Bend your head back!" "Not with the one you rub your feet with!" "Remember Victor?" "The driver with the curly hair?" "Go to bed." "Do you know what time it is?" "When you went to Moscow with that delegation for 20 days I taught him the kiss of life" "Do you know where we started?" "In the car in front of our house" "Now I know where all the money went" "It must have cost you a fortune" " Why all the sudden interest?" " Go to bed" "I'll sleep in the bedroom" "You don't have to do me any favours." "I'm not asking you for anything" " Are you sleeping in the cellar?" " Because of you?" "You're washing up now?" "Look, the birds are already up outside" "Up yours!" "Go to bed!" "Don't worry about little Annie" "Annie's not going to give you your little pleasures" "She's going to give you a hard time" "Look what I found" "What is it?" "The Ear!" "They wouldn't put it where we'd easily find it" "They'd know we'd find out!" "What did we talk about in the kitchen?" "We talked about everything in the kitchen" "How long do you think it's been there?" "It couldn't have been that long" "It really stinks in here." "Can't you open a window?" "There's one there as well" "The old one's gone!" "Tondl's wife said that when they want to listen a green van has to be parked nearby" "It looks like a little postal van" "It has a special aerial" "It looks like a kind of..." "Where can we talk?" "Now, nowhere." "Let's go out on the balcony." "Why do you always lock the boy in?" "If anything happened, he wouldn't be able to get out." "So he can't run riot about the house." "So he couldn't have got out of his room last night." "They put them there last night." "They were here before we came back" "We came back too early." "Do you remember that policeman?" "Weren't you enjoying yourselves?" "Number 117" " That's not my car" " It is, comrade deputy" "I wanted to ask you something" "You've still got a little time to smarten up" "Am I some kind of chorus girl?" "I've got a comb and the comrade will lend me a mirror" "I've still got a few hairs left, so I needn't worry" "Are you afraid the lens is going to crack?" "I wanted to ask you something." "I haven't spoken to you yet, have I?" "No." "Well, we can't change anything anyway" "They didn't come for booze." "They came to finish off the job" "They took the case away earlier" "It was definitely in the cellar" "Can't you write what you want?" "Or read what you want?" "You can do what you want" "As long as they don't hold something against you" "Something!" "But that Standa's your pal from the army, isn't he?" "When were we last in the army?" "Years ago!" "But tell me why?" "Now they know everything about me" "Half wouldn't be enough" "They did a sloppy job on purpose" "We would have found them in the morning anyway" "No way will they wait till morning" "Now when they can't hear us they'll come rushing over!" "Have you got a bottle tucked away somewhere?" "Little Annie?" "You've always got a bottle somewhere, haven't you?" "I've got a bottle somewhere too" "Wait here." "Are you there?" "Open the door!" "Don't do it!" "If you do it I'll do it too!" "What did you want to do?" "You couldn't have done it!" "You couldn't do this to us!" "You can't!" "Where's your gun?" "Give it to me." "Give me the gun." "You have to give it to me." "They took it away." "When they want to they'll do it themselves." "I won't let you go!" "I'm staying with you." "They can lock me up too!" "What are we?" "Still human beings?" "What do you want from us?" "What do you want, Ear?" "Do you want us to kill ourselves?" "Shall we kill ourselves?" "Even you, Ear, can't listen in the toilet!" "Nor in the bathroom!" "Nor the kitchen, do you hear?" "Even functionaries can speak in the kitchen and WC!" "I threw your bugs in the loo!" "I hope you send the plumbers round at last!" "It's the bog downstairs!" "We already reported it three times!" "And a good day to you!" "Come on, let him sleep." "No need to wake him up yet." "What did his teacher say about him?" "He was one of the boys who spat on that picture." "No one told on him, but when they started investigating he reported himself to the Head." "Did we drink to our anniversary?" "It was yesterday." "Today is the 18th." "Look, swallows!" "I've never noticed them before!" "Did you notice that nest?" "That's when they come - between 4:00 and 5:00!" "But it's the phone." "Speaking." "Yes, comrade." "I see." "Of course." "Goodbye, comrade." "He appointed me minister." "In Kosara's place." "How could they do that if they heard everything?" "Yes, they heard it." "I'm scared!" "THE END"