"[snoring]" "Ahh!" "Morning, Dipper." "Guess who." "Oh, what joy." "If it isn't Mr. Upsidedownington." "How long has it been?" "Third grade maybe?" "That's right, and I'm here to deliver you an Upsidedownington-tastic message!" "Is it the message that we're getting too old" " for this sort of thing?" " Um, kinda, actually." "It's that we're exactly one week away from our 13th birthday!" "Whoa!" "Our birthday's coming up already?" "[gasps]" "Soon we're gonna be actual teenagers!" "Finally I can stop reading pre-teen magazines, and start reading post-pre-teen magazines." "PG-13 movies, here I come." "And just one more year until high school." "High school, Dipper!" "Where girls become women, and they teach us stuff about..." " you know what." " Trigonometry?" " Oh, yeah, baby." " That's not the only good news coming up." "In one week, my senior citizen ponytail kit is coming in the mail." "_" "I'm..." "I'm kinda going through some things." "In one week, my grandma is finally letting me eat crackers on my bed." "The future is coming for us all, dudes." " The future." " The future." "The future!" "[chuckles] I'm sorry, I can't take you seriously" " with that face on your chin." " [goofy voice] What face, Dipper?" "You're doing the voice, so you obviously know what I'm talking about." "[goofy voice] I don't know what you're talking about." "[both laughing] There is something wrong with you." "MABEL:" "There's something wrong with both of us." "[title music]" "2x17" " Dipper and Mabel vs The Future" "Alright, party planners!" "In one week, we become teenagers, and summer vacation winds to an end, so we need to throw the greatest party of all time!" "I'm talkin' piñatas with tinier piñatas inside." "Boom, dreams comin' true." "I'm talkin' inviting everyone in town!" "Let's see." "Where do we stand with the gnomes?" "Not so fast, goofus and girl goofus." "After that zombie incident, no one's throwing another party at my house." "I keep finding little bits of the undead in the couch cushions." "But Grunkle Stan, we need some roof to raise." "Dude, you can rent out the Gravity Falls high school gym, and have your party there." "That place is empty all summer long." "The gym's a great idea, Soos." "To the high school!" "[loud crash]" "FORD:" "Dipper, my face is on fire!" "I'll just be a sec." " Hey, Uncle Ford, are you okay?" " Oh, yes, I'm fine." "I just said that to make sure you'd come in here quickly." " But your face is on fire." " Yes." "It's much faster than shaving." "Now listen, Dipper." "I have a very important mission, and you are the only one who can help me." "Remember the rift in dimensional space-time I showed you?" "It's cracking." "This is what Bill has been waiting for." "If it breaks, it'll cause reality as we know it to become completely unraveled." "A hypothetical and catastrophic event I call Weirdmageddon." "Bill is out there, and he'd use any trick from deception to outright possession to make this happen." "But for the sake of humanity, we mustn't let him." " What do we do?" " We patch the rift." "I'll explain on the way." " Wait." "What about Mabel?" " It's okay, Dipper." "You should totally go with Grunkle Ford to save the world or whatever." " Are you sure?" " We're gonna be doing birthday junk all week." "Plus, I packed those walkie-talkies." "Here's one for my party mission, and one for your smarty mission." "[laughing]" "Ahem." "I did mention that the fate of the universe is at stake, didn't I?" "Hurry!" "We haven't much time!" "Okay, Dipper, it's your first big mission with Ford, a chance to prove yourself." "Don't mess this up." "Ow!" "Ah. [chuckles] I'm all right." "Aah!" "[crashing]" "_" "Whoa, Soos, I thought you said this place was empty." " My dogs, what up?" " Wendy, what are you doing here?" "Ugh." "High school registration." "Oh!" "You know, I'm only a year away from high school myself." "Would you say your experience is more rom-com or wacky romp?" "More like teen horror movie." "High school is the worst." "Classes get super hard, your body just flat-out turns against you, and worst of all, everybody hates you." "Can't do it." "Can't do another year!" "My hormones are like a sweaty cage." "Why aren't they singing about following their dreams?" "TV taught me that high school is like some sort of musical." "TV lied, man." "If you can avoid growing up, do it." "I'd give anything to be 12 again." "Anyway, what are you guys doing here?" "[nervous chuckle] Just looking for a place to have my 13th birthday party." "Wendy Borduroy?" "I-I mean Corduroy." "[laughter] Corduroy." "See what I mean?" "Master Mabel to Dippity Dog." "We can have our party at the gym, but we gotta talk about high school." "I'm starting to think it's might not be the awesome future we were expecting." "Over." "[static] I'm going through a bad patch, Mabel." "We'll talk when I get back..." "[static]" "Dipper?" "Come in, come in?" "Hey, I know what will make you feel better." "Let's deliver some invites to your friends, huh?" "Yeah!" "_ [static]" "Mabel?" "Mabel, you there?" "[frustrated groan]" "Listen, Dipper, in order to seal the rift for good, it's going to take an adhesive stronger than anything on Earth." " Something... extraterrestrial in origin." " W-What do you mean?" "Tipper, look at the peculiar shape made by those cliffs." "Does it remind you of anything?" "Hmm..." "Shut... up!" "According to my research, the entire valley of Gravity Valley was formed when an extraterrestrial object crash landed here millions of years ago." "FORD:" "Did this craft cause the town's strange properties?" "Or, did the town's strange properties attract the craft?" " The answer is still unknown." " But that's crazy!" "Where did the saucer go?" "Sometimes, the strangest things in the world are right under our noses." "And our feet, in this particular instance." "Now, you might want to stand back." "This magnet gun could rip the fillings out of a man's mouth" " from a hundred feet." " Aah." "I used to raid this thing for parts for years." "FORD:" "Where do you think I got the materials to build my portal?" "You..." "I... words, not working from mouth." " Now, come." "And take this." " Whoa, Whoa!" "Don't worry, I've been down here countless times." "All the aliens have been dead for millions of years." "Probably." "I can't believe there's been a giant UFO under the town this whole time." "I wish my mind could be where yours is right now, Tipper." "When confirmation of extraterrestrials still had that punch." "Now it's just sort of, meh." "McGucket and I used to come down here all the time to raid their tech ad study their language." "This is so cool!" "[laughs]" "The substance we need to seal the rift is an alien adhesive, strong enough to keep the hull of a spacecraft together." "Just one dollop of this adhesive should be enough to seal a crack in space-time." "Also, if it touches you, it will seal up all the orifices in your face, so try so avoid that." "Now, use your magnet gun and follow me!" " Hup." " Great Uncle Ford!" "Your turn!" "Say "hup"." "It helps!" "[deep breath] Okay, just put on magnet, leap down hole." "Turn on." "Come on already!" "[powering up]" "Magnet!" "Hunh!" "Aah!" "A little help?" "Oh, hi, Mabel." "You're just in time for our one o'clock boy talk." "If you think that's good, boom!" "Me and Dipper's 13th birthday jam!" "Oh, man, your birthday's on the last day of Summer." " I'm not gonna be here." " What?" "Marius is flying me out to Austria to hang out his castle or whatever that week." "He's co clingy!" "You're gonna be out of town for my birthday?" "But at least you can come, right, Candy?" "Sorry, Mabel, my parents send me to music camp this time of year." "There is no escape from music camp." "So neither of you are gonna be at my birthday party?" "And you won't be able to wish me good-bye at the end of the Summer?" " CANDY:" "I'm sorry, Mabel." " Summer happens so fast." "[cell phone ringing]" "Ugh, Marius, now's not the time!" "I think I need to radio for emotional backup." "Dipper, please come in." "Our party mission is going down in flames." "Over. [static]" "Oh..." "This is their storage facility." "This place would have been heavily guarded, but now everything's defunct." "Go ahead, flip any switch." "They've all been busted for millions of years." "Clara, did you eat my farm?" "[mooing]" "FORD:" "The glue should be around here somewhere, so keep your eyes peeled." "Dipper, let me ask you something." " Have you thought much about your future?" " No, not really." "I mean, beyond graduating high school with a high GPA so I can get accepted to a good technical college with a photography and media production minor to start my own ghost hunting show." "[chuckles]" "It's like talking to a younger version of myself." "If you're so sure of what you want out of life, why wait?" "Why put up with the drudgery of school?" "Huh, trust me, I'd love to fast forward the whole thing, but it's not like I have a choice." "Dipper, I've been thinking." "I'm getting too old to investigate Gravity Falls on my own." "I need to train an apprentice to help me fight monsters, solve mysteries, and protect this town." "And I think I'd like to keep it in the family." " What are you saying?" " I've read your additions to my journal, and I'm impressed with your potential." "What would you say to staying in Gravity Falls after the Summer ends and becoming my apprentice?" " W-What about school?" " Dipper, I have 12 PhDs." "Your parents would be thrilled I could give you such an advanced education." "[sighs] There's also Mabel." "She'd be all alone in California." "Mabel will be fine on her own." "She has a magnetic personality." "I watched her become pen pals with the pizza delivery man in the 60 seconds he was at the door." "Gosh, we've never really been apart before." "And isn't it suffocating?" "Dipper, can you honestly tell me you never felt like you were meant for something more?" "I hav..." "I don't know." "Sounds like a dream come true, but I'm not sure I have what it takes." "I was tricked by Bill, I was wrong about Stan's portal." "Heck, I can't even operate this magnet gun right." "[straining]" "Ha!" "Yes!" "Dipper, you found the adhesive!" " I did?" " Oh-ho, you really did it, kid." "Huddle in, let's get a picture of this." "[alien noise]" "Uh, Uncle Ford, you said everything down here is dead, right?" "Yes, unless somehow we reactivated the... [gasps] security system." " What do we do?" " Listen to me very carefully." "I've studied these." "They're security droids, and they detect adrenaline." "You simply have to not feel any fear," " and they won't see you." " What?" "It's okay." "I've done it before." "Just take a deep breath, focus on your intellect, and control your fear." "Wh-Wh-What?" "That's crazy!" "I..." "Follow my lead!" " Great Uncle Ford..." " Focus, Dipper!" "[heartbeat]" "I, uh..." "I-I" " I can't." " Get down!" " Aah!" "No!" "Nooooo..." " Wait!" "No!" "Stay back!" "It's too dangerous." "Sealing the rift is what's important now." "Take this!" "You're gonna have to do it without me." "Use the adhesive." "Fix the rift!" "Save the universe, Dipper." "Great Uncle Ford!" "Hang on, I'm coming for you!" "Don't worry, I'll get you out of there!" "Where's that thing taking you?" "FORD:" "It's an automated prison droid." "And wherever it's going, I'm not coming back." "What?" "[gasps]" "No, no, no." "Don't worry, I'll think of something!" "Dipper, what on earth are you doing?" "[powering up]" "Hold on, Great Uncle Ford." "I'm getting you out of this one way or another." "[click, powering down] Oh, no... [fizzling] [beeping, buzzer blares]" "Come on, come on!" "Aah..." "Let go of my uncle!" "Ohh." "Aah!" "Aah..." " Oh, no." " Aah!" "[crying out]" "Great Uncle Ford!" "Okay, let's try magna-pulse." "[groaning] Huh?" "Oh, no." "Oh, no, no, no, no!" "Come on, wake up, man." "We gotta get out of here before..." "Hey, I'm warning you!" "I have a magnet gun!" "Oh, yeah?" "You think you can scare me?" "Do your worst!" "Nothing in this universe is gonna take away my uncle." "So go ahead, give me what you got." "[panting]" "[Ford laughing, coughing]" "I thought I was a goner, kid." "Are you all right?" "What happened?" "The orb didn't detect any chemical signs of fear." "It assumed the threat was neutralized and then self-disassembled." "[chuckles] I..." "I did it?" "You did it." "This is what I was talking about." "How many other 12-year-olds do you think are capable of doing what you've just done?" "[sighs]" "Hey, everything all right, pumpkin?" "I just can't believe the Summer's almost over." "And now that I know how awful high school's gonna be," "I'm in no hurry to start that train wreck." "Ah." "Nobody likes getting older." "But just because you're growing up doesn't mean you have to grow up, you know?" "I mean, look at me." "I'm pushing 70, and I still eat ice cream for dinner." "But I don't wanna say good-bye to Gravity Falls." "Hey, at least whatever happens after this Summer, you'll still have your brother along with you through thick and thin." "Not everyone can say that, you know." "Yeah." "At least when I go home I always have Dipper." "Good old reliable old... [radio static] DIPPER:" "Are you okay?" "Let's get you out of there." "Listen to me, Dipper, this town is a magnet for things that are special." "And that includes you and me." "It brought both of us here for a purpose." "Stay here with me, Dipper." "Become my apprentice." "Don't let anyone hold you... [coughing]" " I'll do it." "I'm gonna stay." " Excellent." "Now, who wants to save the world, apprentice?" "[both laughing] [radio static]" "Mabel, I just had the best day of my life." "UFOs are real, and there's one under the town, and I saved Great Uncle Ford's life and..." "Hey, are you okay?" "Tell me it's not true, Dipper." "Tell me you were joking." "[radio static, gasps]" "MABEL:" "Ford's apprentice?" "Seriously?" "Look, I was thinking, and this is a huge opportunity for me." "Well, it's a horrible opportunity for me!" "I had the worst day of my life." "When we turn 13, the Summer ends, and I have to leave everything behind." "You're the only person I could count on, and now you're leaving me, too?" "Look, I've been thinking about it." "I won't be gone forever, okay?" "I'll still visit you at home and we'll chat online..." "we'll make it work." "I don't want it to work." "I just wish Summer could last forever." "But it can't, Mabel." "Look, things aren't gonna stay frozen this way." "It's part of growing up." "Things change." "Summer ends." " Ugh!" " Unh!" "Mabel, wait!" "I didn't mean it like that!" "Mabel, come back!" "[music]" "Only party chocolate can cheer me up now." "Nerd bucks?" "Chewed up pens?" "Ugh, wrong backpack." "It's not fair." "I just wish Summer could last forever." "MAN:" "That might be possible." "Sweater Town is not accepting incoming calls right now." "M-M-Mabel, it's me." "What?" "Who said that?" " I-I can help." " The time travel guy?" "What are you doing here?" "You said you don't want Summer to end, right?" " Did I hear that right?" " Yeah." "Why are you asking?" "Look, maybe it's against the rules, but you once did a favor for me, so I thought I could help you out." "It's called a time bubble, and it prevents time from going forward." "Summer in Gravity Falls can last as long as you want it to." "Really?" "But how does it work." "I just need you to get a little gizmo for me from your uncle." "Something small... he won't even know it's missing." "Huh, maybe Dipper has something like that in his nerd bag." "Let me guess." "Mabel didn't take it well?" "I..." "I don't know." "Maybe I'm making the wrong decision." " I need to think about this." " Dipper, right now we need t o focus on the mission." "Now, come on." "I've got the glue." "Hand me the rift and let's make history." "What?" "Oh, no, the rift!" "Huh." "That's odd." " Is this it?" " Yes, that's it!" "Just hand it over and I'll do my thing." "Unless you're ready to leave Gravity Falls." "Just a little more Summer." " Oops!" " What?" "[maniacal laughter]" "Oh, no!" "Wait, wait, wait!" "[snap] Oh... [maniacal laughter]" "At last." "At long, long last!" "The gate between worlds is open!" "The event one billion years prophesized has come to pass!" "The day has come." "The world is finally mine!" "[wind whistling]" "[maniacal laughter] [all gasping]" "What's going on?" "What is that?" "!" "We're too late." "It's the end of the world." "[maniacal laughter]" "[wind whistling] [car alarm blaring] [cracking]" "[people screaming]" "[helicopter passing overhead]"