"Previously on "Chasing Life"..." "I just told a room full of reporters that I had a brain tumor and you're making this about you." "Why would you tell me I could break that story if you were never planning to give it to me?" " Hey, I'm Greer." " She's gay." "It seems like she's in to you." "We're just friends." " I have leukemia, mom." " What?" " I need to figure it out!" " Wait a second!" "I'm sorry, but as your mother, I can't..." "I have to get out of here." "Who is Natalie Ortiz?" " She's my sister, isn't she?" " Yes." "So my dad cheated on my mom." "11-41, copy." "Do we have a name on this one?" "Attleboro E.M.T.'s two minutes out." "What is your name?" "April Carver." "_" "Uhh... were you watching me sleep?" "No." "That would be..." "Creepy?" "Or romantic." "I'm a "glass half-full" kind of guy." "You must be dreading going home." "Why?" "Because I found out last night about my dad's two-decade-old affair that produced a love child?" "You know, maybe..." "It'll bring your family closer together now that the truth is out." "Can I whip you up some breakfast?" "I make a mean smoked salmon Benedict." "I love that you always want to feed me." "I'm Italian." "I'm not really hungry right now." "I get it, you're stressed." "Just hang in there until our date later." "I have a surprise planned." "Hey, what's the deal, woman?" "Where's my kiss?" "It's gonna be okay." "I hope so." "April?" "You're home." "Oh, thank God." "Mom, please tell me you weren't waiting up." "I texted I was staying at Dominic's." "I know." "I know, honey." "I'm..." "I'm so sorry..." "For the way I acted last night." "I was out of line." "No, it's okay." "There's no right way to react to the news that your daughter has cancer." "Well, I'm pretty sure panicking didn't help anything." "I know I have to start treatment." "I made an appointment to see George later today to figure out a plan." "You did." "Oh, April..." "Oh, that's such good news." "See?" "This is gonna be okay." "How are you feeling?" "Fine, I'm fine." "April..." "You've spent so much time being there for me." "Please just let me be here for you." "It's my job." "I don't know." "I'm... scared..." "And... overwhelmed." "And I just..." "I don't wanna die, mom." "Oh, honey." "Listen to me." "That is not gonna happen." "We're gonna figure this out together." "Would it be okay if I went to see" "George with you today?" "Yeah, sure." "Well, it has to be easier now that the cat's out of the bag." "Keeping that secret was really stressful." "No, I know, but..." "Watching their reactions last night was really stressful, too." "I mean, it's almost worse than finding out I had cancer." "Now I have to deal with my anxiety and everyone else's feelings." "Well, at least you don't have to worry about my feelings." "I don't have any." "What would I do without you?" "You'd be an empty shell." "A sad, shriveled up husk of a person." "I would, I swear." "So how's the job search going?" "Oh, actually, I have news." "As you know, it's my goal to find something that I love that could become a career." "Beth, I'm not letting you become a sex worker." "Oh." "Shut up." "Seriously, seeing "Pretty in Pink" with Brenna totally inspired me." "Don't you remember?" "You know, how she made her own clothes, and then in the end she made her..." " pink prom dress." " The pink prom dress, yeah." "I made you something." "Really?" "Oh!" "Open it." "Just open it." "Wha... this is... so..." " Unique." " Just try it on." "Trust me, just try it on." " Yeah?" " Yeah!" "It's, uh..." "It's awful." "It's a start." "Maybe I should have used some kind of measuring device." "It was the best bar mitzvah I have ever crashed." "Like, hands down." "You'll have to come with me next time." "Are you grinding on that rabbi?" "Hi, guys." "How's April doing?" "Okay." " Wait, what's wrong with April?" " I'll tell you later." "Well, if you wanna take your mind off all that heavy stuff," "I'm having a party tomorrow." "My parents are out of town." "Let me guess..." "Nantucket?" "Actually, yeah." "How'd you know?" "I have special powers." "Really?" "So do I." "I can tell when someone's making fun of me and they don't think I realize it." "Anyways, you're welcome to come to my party, too." "Wear blue." "It's a theme." "The Eco Club's raising money for Save the Bay." "Yeah, maybe." " We'll be there." " Great." "Gotta get to class." "See you." "Really?" "You wanna go?" "Yeah, who turns down a party in a freaking castle?" "Unless you have plans with your lover." "No, I think Kieran's working tomorrow." "Then it's on." "You think she has a moat around her house?" "Yesterday he told me that he couldn't handle it." "He said that he loved me too much to watch me die." "He actually used those words." "I know that he's been seeing that girl again." "I can smell her tacky perfume on his clothes, so..." "I punched him in the face." "I think I broke his nose." "Meg, I don't normally condone violence, but that guy's a douche bag and you're awesome." "Well..." "Um, I just found out that I have A.M.L." "I have to start treatment soon." "And I know this is such a trivial thing to worry about, but I'm terrified of losing my hair." "And just feeling... ugly..." "And weak." "I can't even climb the stairs anymore without getting winded." "It's... it's like every day I have to deal with losing something else." "The latest is my appetite." "I take a couple of bites and that's it." "But, I mean, I love food though." "I really always have." "And now not being able to find pleasure in something that I've always loved so much is just really... sad." "It's like..." "Everything that makes my life full..." "Is starting to slip away." "So you're starting to catch on to how much fun this is." "Okay, so as we discussed before," "I'm not gonna be handling your treatment." "I'm referring you to Dr. Susan Hamburg, who is a friend." "She's also one of the top" "A.M.L. specialists in Boston." "I want you to have the best care available." "So this is what will most likely happen first:" "Dr. Hamburg will review all your test results, and then she'll prep you for chemo, which will be in the next few days." "Would you like me to go over the specifics on that right now?" " Yes." " No." "Well, honey, I don't want you to be blindsided." "You need time to process everything." "I haven't done extensive research on purpose." "I'd rather learn details as they come up, otherwise I'm gonna drive myself crazy, obsessing about what's gonna happen down the line." " That's reasonable." " George..." "And she is the patient." "George, please." "Mom, don't you care what I want?" "Of course, but don't you think having the information up front just makes sense?" "April." " Fine." " Okay." "You'll be getting your first round of chemotherapy, which is called induction therapy." "And Dr. Hamburg will then determine what the next step is, depending on how the cancer responds to the chemo." "And what about consolidation?" "I read that that involves a stem cell transplant?" " Here, wait a second, I have..." " Yeah, but that's down the line." "But... no, no." "You really don't need the Internet now." "I'm right here, Sara." "I know, it's just... here, hang on." "I've got it right here." "Oh, and there were some experimental treatments" " that I think are..." " Mom, please." "I just have a few more questions." "But I don't." "And I'm the one who's sick." "I'm doing this for you." "I just..." "I have to get back to work." "Are you coming?" "I'm not done talking to George." "Fine, I'll see you at home." " Thanks, George." " Sure." "All right." "What are the side effects of chemo?" "I mean, I know April doesn't want to hear this, but I do." "I'm gonna be the one taking care of her." "Well, uh..." "Nausea, mouth sores, rashes, increased risk of infection and fever." "And there's a possibility of changes to her fertility." "Wait, what?" "What does that mean exactly?" "Well, she might not be able to conceive after chemo." "I'll let her know." "No, please don't." "The last thing she needs is another excuse" " to postpone treatment." " Sara, please." "It's unethical of me to withhold medical information which could impact her future." "I'm well aware of the ethics, George, but I need her to have a future." "Right, you can't possibly understand, because you've never been a parent." "You made other choices, as we both know." "That doesn't change my position here." "Then let me talk to her about it." "Where were you last night?" "I thought you were gonna call me after Beth dropped you off." "Yeah, sorry." "When I got home, things were kind of going down." "My mom found out about April." "God, I'm sorry." "You should have called me." "I can't find my punch card." "Oh no, that's okay." "You're in here a lot." "I recognize you." "Here, now you're only three coffees away from a free one." "Sweet." "Thank you." "God, that guy was so creepy." "Really?" "He was just being nice." "Yeah, I guess..." "In a creepy way." "Wait, are you jealous?" "You are!" "Fine, maybe just a little." "I'm usually above all that, but..." "I don't know... you bring it out in me." "Just don't make me get your name tattooed on my body." "How about really small, on your lower back or something?" " No." " Not even in Latin?" "What is Kieran in Latin?" "Kieran." "3:00, latest." "Hey, Paul." "I was just wondering if you had any open assignments for your "what the heck" column?" "I'm sure I do." "That'd be very helpful." "Let me think..." "I got a guy who's suing the donut place in south station." "Wants the company to admit you can, in fact, become addicted to donut holes." "I got a call from a man in Concord, who claims he got rabies from his pet turtle." "I'm pretty sure that's a practical joke." "Oh!" "Speaking of rabies, a rabid Sox fan super glued his butt to his seat at Fenway." "Fire department's there now." "At least that's breaking news, I'm in." "There's a few different angles you could take with the story, but make sure to approach it from behind." "April, not sure who you're sleeping with..." " Excuse me?" " but apparently, you have been personally requested by the Hendrie campaign for a one-on-one." ""Personally requested"?" "I just got a call." "Bruce and his family are shooting a campaign ad and you will be shadowing them on set." "Well, I'll be there." "And I will be at a luncheon at The Ritz." "American businesswoman's association Elizabeth Warren is speaking, so it's not like I could have gone to this Hendrie thing anyway." "Then it's a good thing you weren't the one they personally requested." "You still won't tell me?" "You'll see when we get there." "That's why it's called a surprise." "But it's the perfect way to celebrate." "Not too shabby... one-on-one with Bruce Hendrie." "I know, can you believe it?" "How did it happen?" "I don't know, Raquel just told me they personally requested me." "That must have killed her." "Who do you think requested you?" "Well, there's only one person in the Hendrie camp who owes me." "Leo?" "I just didn't think he had a conscience." "Wow, maybe he's not as bad as we thought." " This is it?" " Mm-hmm." "Amazing right?" "It's a food crawl." "A lot of the restaurants from that "best of Boston" list are participating." "Homemade papparedelle from Erdaluce, roasted bone marrow from Toro, oysters from Neptune." "Russo." "Wow, this is... this is great." "Thank you." "Hey, Graham." "So it looks like your secret's out." "What are you talking about?" "I'm a light sleeper, and I'm very familiar with those sounds." "My sister had all kinds of body image stuff in high school." "I wasn't purging." "That's terrible." "So, are you just..." "Oh." "Is Dominic the father?" "What?" "No." "Graham, I am not pregnant." "Well, if you are, just let me know asap, okay?" "'Cause if you're gonna turn my bedroom into a nursery" " then I'm gonna have to find" " Good night." "a new place, which takes forever." "You know, I don't want to end up on some random dude's couch." "This is also about me, you know!" "What's going on?" "Just the woman we've been waiting for." "I know what this looks like..." "A seance?" "No, it's a meditation circle." "George said you should try to reduce your stress before you start chemo." " So I..." " When did George say that?" "After you left the appointment." "I know you didn't want to know any more details, but..." "Well, I mean, if you already know them, just tell me." "Maybe I don't want to be blindsided." "What else did he say?" "Anything major?" "No." "Just that you need to learn how to calm your anxiety, so..." "Well, I don't know if I need..." "Come on, Ape." "It'll be fun." "We'll get in touch with our fundamental selves." "If I'm doing it, so are you." "Welcome to the beginning of a life-changing journey." "First, find a comfortable position." "Ideally, sitting up." "Rest your hands gently in your lap or on your legs, then close your eyes." "We're going to begin by focusing on the breath." "Take deep breaths, in through your nose, out through your mouth." "Do this five times." "Your breath should sound like a soft, gentle wind." "Now, try to clear your mind completely." "I can't do this." "April, no." "Look, I know it's hard." "A lot of my patients meditate." "And it does take practice, but it really works for them." "Please, just... how about you try five minutes?" "I wish I could, mom." "But I have a job." "And there's no such thing as just five minutes for me anymore." "Every minute counts." "That did not sound like a soft, gentle wind." "I'm Bruce Hendrie, and I want to be your next governor." "I will fight to make health care more affordable, and more accessible for all the people of Massachusetts." "After all, I have a very personal investment in this issue." " I want you..." " Hey, guys." "I'm the sick kid with the brain tumor." "I'm available for weddings and parties." "When I was first diagnosed, my father here was on a golfing trip." "And he stayed and played golf another three days" " before coming home." " Cut, let's take lunch." "What is this, Leo?" "What?" "You told me to be myself." "All you had to do was stand there." "You don't even have a line." "I want people to know that I have a very personal relationship with the health care issues." "You paid for my treatments in cash." "No no no." "Hang on, sorry." "Do you know anything about the health care reform before your staff prepped you this morning?" "Because I think I overheard you asking someone what the difference between medicare and medicaid was, and it's not just the letters, by the way." "You must be the reporter from "The Post."" "Bruce Hendrie." "April Carver." "It's so nice to meet you, sir." "Likewise." "How about I give you an interview after you eat?" "I'm not really hungry, so we could start now." " What's the matter?" " Nothing." "Is it 'cause we haven't defined this?" "I'm not usually into labels, but I'd go there for you." "Boyfriend, girlfriend... should we make it official?" "Or... or not?" "I don't think that I'm ready for that yet." "I'm just all over the place right now, and there's so much going on with April." "I know..." "I know that you must be scared to lose her, but there's this Socrates quote that I always remember when I think about loss." ""To fear death is nothing other than to think oneself wise when one is not."" "I don't know if that helps, but it made me see things differently." "So you don't see your investment in Anza Energy" " as a conflict of interest?" " Not at all." "I was never employed there." "I do have a financial interest in it, so..." "That was my next question." "Is there a reason you haven't revealed exactly how much that stake is?" "That information is private." "That information is private." "I'll redirect." "If you're elected, some people are concerned about your potential role in the State Utilities Commission." "Mr. Hendrie has to get back to the shoot." "No problem." "Thank you so much." "My pleasure." "And as a professional, can we assume you'll use only the material you received on the record?" "I'll have to discuss that with my editor." "I say use all of it." "The best stuff is always off the record." "Oh no, you know what?" "Drink this." "You need the calories before you pass out." "Trust me, you'll be able to keep it down." "You're the one that requested me, weren't you?" "I thought I'd... square my karma." "Leo, we need you back on set for the doctor's office setup." " And you have your line." " You know what?" "That's not happening." "If you really need Leo Hendrie in your ad, you're just gonna have to create him with C.G.I." "_" "Why'd you even show up, anyway?" "I always wanted to be in a TV commercial." "Now I can cross it off my bucket list." "Okay, it's impossible to have a real conversation with you." "Do you have any idea what it's like to be an adult and have your parents treat you like a child?" "Please, you are a child, living off your trust fund." "I didn't use to." "When I lived in Paris," "I didn't take a dime from my parents." "I paid my own bills," "I lived in a crappy apartment," "I worked at a crappy job at a bakery and I loved it." "I went on the roof of my building every night, and I would look out at the city and think about all the things" "I was gonna do with my life." "And then I got sick, I had to move back home and... it's all gone now." "My parents don't even have a roof you can stand on." "I get it." "I live at home, too, and my mom has started micromanaging my life." "I feel like I'm suffocating." "Well, at least she's trying." "My parents just use me as a prop in their lives." "I would never do that to my kids." "But then again, I won't be having any, and you probably won't either." "What?" "No one's told you?" "Well, that figures." "Chemo can cause infertility." " Why wouldn't someone tell me that?" " I don't know." "See?" "Everyone else is pulling the strings in your life." "You want to go for a ride?" " Get out of your head?" " Uh, no thanks." "Oh, are you scared?" "You play it way too safe, cancer friend." "I can tell." "I do not." "Then prove it." "Pull your own strings for once." "See how it feels." "I'll throw in three years free maintenance and two of those leather jackets you had your eye on." "One for your pretty girlfriend." "Almost sold." "I think all I need now is..." "To take it for a test drive." "Beautiful, I just need to make a copy of your license and I'll be jumping in the back with you." "Great." "Tell me you are not buying one of these." "Please, I may have a brain tumor, but I'm not insane." "Wait, don't we have to wait for the..." "Yeah, we probably should." "Hey, come back!" "Pull the car over!" "Seriously!" "Leo, this is a crime!" "I'm an accomplice." "Pull over!" "Pull over!" "Aww." "Oh my God." " What are you so scared of?" " Oh, where do I start?" "Uh, dying in a high-speed car chase," " going to jail." " They're not gonna take you to jail." "You have cancer." "And it's better to die in a high-speed car chase than from stress, which is what you're doing." "You're so uptight." "I don't know how you live your life like this." "Oh, you're making judgments about how I live my life?" "You just committed a felony!" "Oh, if you're gonna turn around and go back, fine, but it's a really boring decision." "You'll never get an opportunity to drive a beautiful car like this ever again, which is a tragedy." "But, you know, if that's what you want, it's no skin off my back." "It's your life." "Do you know how to paddle shift?" "Whoo!" "I guess you do." "I love that you actually wore blue." "Do you think people are gonna get that you're being ironic?" "I don't know, but they'll definitely get" " that you aren't." " Whatever." "I'm an oil spill." ""Save the bay." Save my ass." "She's only throwing this so she can get into Yale." " What are you doing?" " I'm kidding." "Dude, calm down." "You lost your sense of humor the second we got to Brookline." "Come on, let's give ourselves the grand tour." "Whoa, I could live in here." "Okay, you know, when you think about it, the concept of a bidet is, like, disgusting." "Oh my God, there's Chanel in here." "Okay, we're trying stuff on." "We're starting a Tumblr page." " You can do the captions." " Dude, no." "What if we ruin something?" "We won't." "It'll be funny." "No, you know what?" "Greer invited us here and..." "Whatever, the only reason she invited us here is because your sister has cancer and she wants to seem deep." "And I want to get back to the party." "Fine, but can you lend me your phone?" "Because mine's full." "Long story." "See you later." "_" "_" "_" "Mom, I love the car!" "Yeah." "Nice ride." "My son likes it, too." "Thanks." "He's really cute." "What is it?" "I might never have that." "Kids, the husband..." "Station wagon." "Well, you can still have the station wagon..." "If you're into that sort of thing." "And you can have the husband." "And you can have the kids too." "They just might not have your D.N.A., which, by the way, is a good thing, right?" "What are you doing?" "I have a boyfriend." "Don't worry." "I'll handle this." "Stay in the vehicle." "This car has been reported as stolen." "What do we do?" "Um..." "What are you doing?" "You heard them." "I'm, uh..." " I'm a..." " Leo, are you okay?" " Stay in the vehicle!" " Wait!" "Sir, back in your vehicle!" "Leo!" "Ma'am!" "Help him!" "He has a brain tumor!" "Passenger's having a seizure, 11-41." " 11-41, copy." " Do we have a name on this one?" " Attleboro E.M.T.'s two minutes out." " What is your name?" "April Carver." "Did you get in trouble?" "How are you?" "I repeat:" "Did you get in trouble?" "No, your seizure was pretty convenient." "See?" "Silver lining." "Cancer can get you out of all sorts of situations." "Being the son of Bruce Hendrie didn't hurt either." "Nah, I think it was the seizure." " Come here." " What?" "Come here." "I want to tell you something." "Come here." "You'll come around eventually." "You're gonna love me." "Can you leave us for a few minutes?" "I need to speak to the patient." "Oh, no no no." "She can stay." "Fine." "The seizure was definitely caused by..." "The tumor pressing against my brain stem, got it." "The M.R.I. results show that the primary tumor unfortunately has grown," " which means..." " Maybe I've got three or four months to live if I'm lucky." "Old news." "I'm so sorry." " S... so you're..." " Terminal." "Yup." "I was looking for you." "Same here." "Hey." "So how's April doing?" "Not great." "It's scary." "Everyone's always asking me if I'm okay, and I feel like I have to say "yes"" "or else they're gonna make me keep talking about it..." "And I don't want to." "Oh, I'm sorry I brought it up." "No, it's okay." "I didn't mean you." "I know you're probably gonna think this sounds stupid, but I don't believe life ends when you die." "Last year I was with my grandmother when she died." "Really?" "What was it like?" "I thought it was gonna be awful... and sometimes it was... but it was actually really inspiring." "She was completely lucid and said she felt this warmth surrounding her, like she knew she was gonna be taken somewhere beautiful." "Wow." "And then she told me she loved me and closed her eyes." "Anyway, after that, I did a lot of reading, and the stories are like mind-blowing." "I always thought that stuff wasn't true, like the white light people see is really electricity from the brain." "I mean, I don't know if there's a heaven..." "But I know April's going to be okay, no matter what happens." "Thank you." "That's the first thing anyone's said that's actually made me feel better." "So I know this is kind of coming out of nowhere, but I just wanted to tell you that..." "Wait." "Is that your boyfriend?" "I had no idea he was coming." "I'm sorry." "I'll find you later." "_" " Ms. Carver." " Uh, April, please." "April, I want to thank you for calling me and for helping my son." "We're very grateful." "I didn't really do anything." "We don't really care about the details." "We're just glad that he's here now" " and he's all right." " Despite what it may look like," "I do know the difference politics and family." "I love Leo, and we only just learned that he was terminal." "The thought of losing my son, my only child..." "Is unbearable." "Where's Leo?" "I'll call security." "Leo." "What are you doing?" "You heard the news." "I've got maybe three or four months left, so I figure why not speed up the process?" "I mean, today is as good a day as any." "What happened to living each day to the fullest?" "Screw that." "This'll make a better headline for "The Post."" " You're welcome." " No!" "Oh!" "You are such an ass!" "Did you really think I was gonna kill myself?" "Especially by jumping off a building?" "I mean, how cliche would that be?" "God!" "Do you take anything seriously?" "!" "Why should I?" "I'm gonna die." "What's the point in worrying about anything?" "It's liberating, really." "I don't have to worry about what my life is gonna be like down the line." "There is no "down the line" for me." "There isn't gonna be a station wagon." "There aren't gonna be any kids." "Worrying about the future is not living." "Today... we lived." "This... this right here." "This is living." "Pretending to die is living?" "Absolutely, yes." "What?" "Do you really think you're living your life to the fullest by sitting behind a desk every day?" "Don't you want to have adventures like we had today all the time?" "Or do you... do you want to spend the rest of the time you have left answering to other people?" "What are you doing here?" "What do you mean?" "You texted me." "This girl is into fish." "I don't think that we should be in Greer's room." "It's a party and the door's open." " Come here." " I don't know." "I don't bite, unless you like that." "Greer." "Sorry, we were just taking a nap." "Just leave..." "Both of you." "What's up, guys?" "What are you wearing?" "!" "Take that off!" "Oh, you would like that, wouldn't you..." "Oh God." "Where's the bidet?" "Hey, where have you been?" "I've been trying to get in touch with you." "Working." "Long day." "And starving." "Mom, where are the frozen waffles?" "They're in the trash." "They're full of high-fructose corn syrup and things I can't even pronounce." "This is now an organic, whole food household." "You've got to be kidding me." "I'm hungry for the first time in days, and all I want right now is a waffle." "Wait a minute." "What are you talking about?" "Why are you... have you not been eating, April?" "Seriously, mom, I'm fine." " April." " Stop it." "What is this?" "!" "What happened to my curtains?" "Where's my rug?" "They were full of dust mites." "You need a sterile environment so you don't catch anything before chemo." "And what did you do to my mattress?" "It's temporary, until I can buy an organic one." "And get the right anti-bacterial..." "How could you do this without my permission?" "This is my only personal space in this entire house." "It's like nothing is mine anymore ever since you found out I was sick." "You hijacked my doctor's appointment, you invade my privacy and cover everything in plastic." "You just decide what I get to eat?" "Honey, it's a mother's job to protect her child, whether you like it or not." "Well, speaking of being a parent," "I'm making an appointment to see a fertility doctor." " What?" " I found out that the chemo could make me infertile and I don't want that." "I cannot believe George." "What do you mean?" "I..." "He told you that?" "!" "Why wouldn't he tell me?" "I told him not to." "Wha..." "How could you do that to me?" "Your life is more important than you having biological children." "That is not your choice to make!" "It's my body!" "And if I want to have a baby..." "April, you are my baby!" " Don't you understand..." " Oh God!" "Mom!" "I am sorry, but I am an adult!" "The only way I am gonna get through this is I have some hope of having a normal life one day." "I'm going to see a fertility doctor." "You're scheduled to start chemo..." "Well, we'll reschedule it, because I am doing this first!"