"Is there anybody there?" "Is there anybody there?" "This is Radio 3." "Is there anybody there?" "(DISCO MUSIC PLAYING)" "You dancing?" "Who's asking?" "I'm asking." "You're asking?" "I'm asking, are you dancing?" "Am I dancing?" "I'm dancing." "Right, I'll have your chair, then." "Hello, good evening and welcome to the third in our series of Shakespeare Master Class.' An Actor Prepares." "Last week, if you remember, we were concentrating largely on the body." "Well, tonight, it's the turn of the voice and we'll be doing some vocal work." "Well, here's our space, where's our actor?" "Well, we're very lucky to have with us in the studio this evening Hugh." "Hello, Hugh." "Hi." "Hi." "What have you prepared for us this evening, Hugh?" "I have a speech from Troilus, 3, III." "It's the Ulysses speech." "The Ulysses speech, Tand C, 3, III." "That's on page 66 in your Cambridge editions if you'd like to follow at home." "So, Hugh, what I want you to do first of all is to imagine that you're a racing car going round a track, all right?" "Right." "Now, there's a video camera attached to you so as you go round the track," "we're all going to get a good view of it, okay?" "Okay." "Now, later on, Hugh, we'll be taking your engine apart, piece by piece, oiling it, putting it back together again." "Right." "All right?" "But first of all," "let's have a view, shall we?" "Okay." "Thank you, Hugh." "Yeah." "Hugh." "Yes?" "Why are you squatting?" "Oh, sorry, I thought..." "I don't think we're ready for that yet, are we?" "No." "Just the speech." "Okey-doke." ""Time hath, my lord, a wallet at his back" ""Wherein he puts alms for oblivion" ""A great-sized monster of ingratitude."" "Well, as you can see, Hugh, there's still a long way to go, isn't there?" "Yeah." "All right, let's start right at the beginning, shall we?" "Right, yeah." "What's the word..." "What's the word, I wonder, that Shakespeare decides to begin his sentence with here?" ""Time" is the first word." "Time." "Yeah." "Time." "Yeah." "And how does Shakespeare decide to spell it, Hugh?" "T-I-M-E." "T-I..." "M." "M-E." "Yeah." "And what sort of spelling of the word "time" is that?" "Well, it's the ordinary spelling." "It's the ordinary spelling, isn't it?" "It's the conventional spelling." "Oh, right." "So, why, out of all the spellings he could've chosen, did Shakespeare choose that one, do you think?" "Well, because it gives us time in an ordinary sense." "Exactly, well done, good boy." "Because it gives us time in an ordinary," "in a conventional sense." "Oh, right." "So, Shakespeare has given us time in a conventional sense." "Yeah." "But he's given us something else, Hugh." "Have a look at the typography, what do you spy?" "Oh, it's got a capital "T"." "Shakespeare's "T" very much uppercase there, Hugh, isn't it?" "Why?" "Because it's the first word in the sentence." "Well, I think that's partly it, but I think there's another reason, too." "Shakespeare has given us time" "in a conventional sense." "Uh-huh." "And time in an abstract sense." "Right." "All right?" "Yeah." "Think your voice can convey that, Hugh?" "I hope so." "I hope so, too." "All right, give it a go." "Just the one word, then?" "Just the one word for the moment." "Yeah, okay." "Whoa, whoa, whoa." "Hugh, Hugh, Hugh, where do we gather from?" "Oh, the buttocks." "Always the buttocks." "Sorry." "Hugh, we gather from the buttocks." "Right." "Thank you." ""Time!"" "What went wrong there, Hugh?" "I don't know." "I got a bit lost in the middle, actually." "What I want you to do now" "is to take the word "time"..." "Yeah." "...and to start adding some of your own feelings." "All right?" "Right." "Some of your feelings of ruin and hopelessness and tragedy and despair." "Feelings of loss and grief and bereavement." "But feelings, too, of hope and spirit and love and ambition, all right?" "Feelings of jealousy, envy and covetousness." "Right." "Wantonness?" "No, leave wantonness out, Hugh." "Oh, right, okay." "All right?" "So, one more time, then, all right?" "Right." "But I think what we'd better do first is do you feel ready for a little exercise designed to build up your confidence and help your voice projection?" "Yes." "You do?" "Good." "With me then, I want you to adopt the mime stance, all right?" "Right." "Mime stance." "Good, now hand on shoulder." "Good boy." "Now, what I want you to do, after three, with me, is to say the word "time" 1 0 times," "very fast." "Right." "All right?" "Yeah." "Without the script?" "Off book, yes." "So, three." "BOTH:" "Time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time, time." "You see?" "Oh, right." "You get that sense, that sense of..." "Uh, drivel." "That sense of what I like to call time collapsing into nonsense, Hugh." "A sense of nonsense." "Nonsense." "Shakespeare knew it was there." "We can't shirk it now." "Put it in with the others, all right?" "Gathering from the buttocks." "Thank you." "(SHRIEKING) "Time!"" "Much, much better, Hugh." "Thanks." "Well done, we make tremendous strides." "This is very exciting work." "I'm very excited." "I hope you're excited, too." "All right?" "So, Hugh, what I want you to do now is to see how great the strides we've made have been by reading the rest of the speech as well" "using what we've learnt." "Okay." "All right." "Right." ""Time hath, my lord, a wallet at his back Wherein he puts alms for oblivion" ""A great-sized monster of ingratitude."" "Well, as you can see, still a very long way to go there." "Well, we'll be returning to Hugh with that speech, later on, perhaps, in our 1 988 series." "But meanwhile, until the same time next week, from Shakespeare Master Class.' An Actor Prepares It, good night and God bless." "SHEARER (WITH RUSSIAN ACCENT):" "Ah, this is well in control." "I play queen d8 àollowed by knight h5 to à4, exploiting his doubled à-pawns and weak king side." "Yes, is strong move, queen d8." "SLATTERY:" "Well, what's he done that àor?" "It was all nice beàore that, it went black, white, black, white, all the way down in a kind oà zigzag." "I've got to balance it up, haven't I?" "I've got to balance it up." "I'll move this tall thrusting one." "SHEARER:" "Oà course, now he attacks my queen and gains a tempo." "What a good move." "What to do?" "What to do?" "I have the resource." "I must generate play on the black squares." "I'll play queen c7 with the idea oà rook c8 doubling on the c àile, exercising pressure on his isolated queen's bishop's pawn." "Yes, this is àine." "Queen c7." "SLATTERY:" "Well, he's a bleeding anarchist, this one." "I mean, what's the point oà having even squares like that là you're then gonna go and anarchist it?" "I'll have to move this horsey one here." "Oh, this is in the way." "Well, he won't notice." "SHEARER:" "The man takes on à6 check, oà course." "This is genius." "Now he threatens bishop à6, àollowed by bishop h 7, check king h 7, queen e4, check, my king side is destroyed." "And he gets mate in... 1 4 moves." "(SPEAKING RUSSIAN)" "What a player." "Oh, I have nothing." "I must resign." "Oi, you knocked your king over." ""The day the letter arrived, I was due in court on the intricate case of Melchett vs The Vatican," ""which was coming to a delicate and potentially explosive stage." ""The letter then came as a welcome diversion" ""and I tipped the delivery boy out of the window with more than ordinary generosity." ""Even then, I fancy I gave a momentary shudder as I unfolded the letter." ""But it was a cold morning, and in accordance with Mr Tulkinghorn's instructions" ""with regard to Melchett vs The Vatican, I was naked." ""The letter read as follows." ""'If Mr John Lawson Particle will travel immediately to Transylvania" ""'as the honoured guest of Count Dracula" ""'to personally advise His Excellency on a matter of great legal delicacy," ""'Mr Lawson Particle will be handsomely remunerated." ""'He is to bring on his journey no garlic," ""'no crucifixes, no wooden stakes." ""'Neither is he to look up in a dictionary the word "vampire".'" ""It seemed innocent enough." ""Excited at the prospect of escaping a dreary London August," ""I rushed into Mr Tulkinghorn's office." ""He read the letter through and eyed me carefully." ""Then he looked at my face." ""'You don't find anything strange in this letter, Mr Lawson Particle?" "'" ""'Ah, you noticed it, too, sir." ""'The split infinitive in the first sentence, yes.'" ""'No, I was thinking..." "Never mind." ""'You plan to go on this suic..." "on this fascinating journey?" "'" ""'With your permission, sir, I will go straight home, dress," ""'and take the first train to Southampton.'" ""Four days later" ""saw me standing at the gates of Castle Dracula," ""weary and travel-stained." ""Prudence had demanded that I leave her behind, so I was alone." ""Night was just falling as I knocked on the mighty oaken door," ""and heard the answering echoes ring through the castle." ""After what seemed a cliche," ""iron bolts were drawn back, the portal swung open," ""and Count Dracula's manservant stood before me." ""Of all the hideously disfigured spectacles I have ever beheld," ""those perched on the end of this man's nose" ""remain forever pasted into the album of my memory." ""Bowing low, this loathsome wretch introduced himself." ""'Travolta, sir, at your servile." ""'If you will follow me, I shall tell the master you have arrived.'" ""Walking with a pronounced limp, L-I-M-P, pronounced limp," ""he showed me into a waiting room."" "Sorry. "Into a waiting room and vanished." ""Presently, he returned with his master." ""'Ah, Mr Lawson Particle!" "' cried the Count." ""'Welcome to Castle Dracula." "Dinner is in half an hour, if you would care to change." ""'We can leave business until tomorrow." "Travolta will show you to your room." ""'Tell me, what blood type are you?" "'" ""'A.'" ""'I said, what blood type are you?" "'" ""'Oh,' I said. 'B.'" ""I tried to question Travolta as I dressed for dinner." ""I asked him the nature of the Count's business," ""but he made the sign of the cross and said nothing." ""I asked him why there were no mirrors in the castle." ""But this time he made the sign of the very cross indeed and spat accordingly." ""This was puzzling." ""I couldn't see myself spending a month in a house without mirrors." ""The man was either mad or both." ""'Capon for dinner, sir,' said Travolta, as we descended the vast stairway." ""'Capon." "Yummy,' I replied." ""'No, sir, the Count always insists that his guests put a cape on for dinner.'" ""And what a dismal repast it was." ""I passed a fitful night in my vast bedroom." ""Below me, I could hear the Count's footsteps echoing in the hallway." ""I arose early, made my toilet, sat on it and then came down to breakfast." ""Travolta informed me that his master had gone to bed at dawn," ""and would expect me in his study later that evening." ""It was a dreary morning." ""The greatest excitement I had to look forward to was the prospect of a total eclipse of the sun," ""which was expected during the afternoon." ""When the time came, I watched through a fragment of smoked glass," ""as the moon slid slowly across the surface of the sun" ""and darkness shrouded the Earth." ""I started at a sound behind me." ""By the dim light of a candle I had prudently placed on the table," ""I could see that it was Count Dracula, my client." ""He seemed a little excited." ""A tendril of spaghetti appeared to be protruding from either side of his mouth." ""'Why, good afternoon, Count!" "' I cried." ""'I wasn't expecting you until this evening." "Have you come to enjoy the spectacle?" "'" ""'Spectacle?" "'" ""'The solar eclipse.'" ""He looked out of the window." ""'Solar eclipse?" "'" ""'Yes, it's the first total eclipse I've ever seen." "Exciting, isn't it?" "'" ""'Oh, shit.'" ""'Is there something wrong, Count?" "'" ""'How much longer is it going to last?" "' he cried, and I could see fear in his blood-red eyes." ""'Well, it's just ending now,' I replied." "'Look at that." "Splendid, isn't it?" "'" ""I turned in time to watch the moon moving slowly away from the sun," ""and light once more flooding the scene." ""'Have you seen anything so..." ""'Oh." "Count?" "'" ""But he had disappeared, leaving his cape behind him." ""In his hurry, he must have upset the ashtray on the floor beside it." ""I never saw him again."" "And not many people know that the Special Patrol Group have been instructed by Margaret Thatcher to kill everyone in the world." "Have we, have we forgotten the lessons of Brixton and Toxteth?" "Luton." "Luton?" "Yeah, looting', rioting', pillaging'." "I mean, doesn't it seem strange, doesn't it seem strange, that like, every time there's a major civil disturbance on the streets, the police just happen to turn up?" "And they turn up with riot shields and water pistols." "Cannon." "Cannon." "I've had some really bad harasslement from the SPG." "Tell them." "Go on, tell them." "Right, I will." "Okay." "Like, only the other day, only the other day, I was trucking down the Bayswater Road." "Well, I wasn't trucking, I was walking, in fact." "And when suddenly, suddenly, this bloody huge Transit... panda car pulled up." "And from out of the inside of it flooded about..." "Well, how many, how many?" "Two." "Two." "There were two of them." "Two SPG officers, and one of them came right up to me and kicked me in the stomach." "(EXCLAIMING INDIGNANTLY)" "Well, not so much kicked me in the stomach as said, "Excuse me, sir, what are you doing with that aerosol can?"" "So I punched her." "Are you sure she was a woman?" "Oh, she was a woman, yeah." "Okay, but I mean, women have got every right to be as vicious as men." "Right, I mean, hello 1 981 ." "Two." "Two." "Welcome to the 20th century, okay?" "Now, we'd like to dedicate this next song to all the plainclothes SPG men in the audience tonight, all right?" "(PLAYING GUITAR)" "It's called Ià You Can't Smoke It, Kick It To Death." "# Well, the filth are out to get you" "# Every single one" "# Let the devil take the hindmost Just pick up your bags and run" "# They may tell you it's only their job But they love it every bit" "# So when they say it's not their way They're talking a lot of" "# Hypocrisy, they hate you" "# Everybody hates you" "# You better look out behind you To see them stabbing you between the eyes" "# Well, if you believe in friendship You're making a mistake" "# 'Cause everybody's out to screw you Everyone's on the make" "# The world is full of it Everywhere you look" "# All the bloody establishment figures Rum-te-tum-te-book" "# They hate you" "# Everybody hates you" "# You better look out behind you To see them stabbing you between the eyes" "# Everybody in this world is out for number one" "# You better forget it, baby If you're thinking of having fun" "# Never mind the bureaucrats You've gotta use your mouth" "# That's one of the things they taught me When I was at Charterhouse" "# They hate you" "# Everybody hates you" "# Well, you better look out behind you" "# To see them stabbing you" "# Stabbing you # Stabbing you" "# Stabbing you # Stabbing you" "# Between the eyes #" "Ladies and gentlemen, the Evening Star Award àor the best West End actress oà 1 98 1." "And the nominations are..." "Jacqueline Pike-Harding àor her peràormance as Ian" "in Botham.' A New Musical." "Sarah Platt, àor her part in Alan Ayckbourn's" "No Pyjamas In My Soup, Thanks, I'm A Satirist." "Diana Spencer, àor her part in The Revival Oà Manhood at the Prince oà Wales." "And Julianna Talent, àor her peràormance as Julianna in the play Julianna." "And the winner is..." "Ià I can just get the envelope open." "Ladies and gentleman, Miss Julianna Talent." "(ORCHESTRA PLAYING FANFARE)" "Your Royal Highness, my lords, ladies and gentlemen, àellow artists," "this award doesn't really belong to me." "I must just say how worried I was aàter Gonerill at the Warehouse, um, that I was going to be able to cope with...with Julianna." "I think the thing that worried me about her was that she might, as it were, start taking over." "I don't know how else to put it, really." "She might, as it were, start playing me." "But là ever I àelt her getting on top oà me, all I'd have to do would be to just turn round and say," ""Hey, lady, back oàà. "" "And she would, because that was the sort oà relationship we had." "At this point I'd like to say a very warm hello and good luck to Glenda, who's taking over àor me tonight." "Brave, brave lady." "And oà course I'd like to thank àrom the very bottom oà my heart my husband Lindsay, the director." "Actually, would it be all right là I did a little sort oà story thing here?" "Oh, please." "Would that be okay?" "It's not very long." "I don't think it'll bore you or anything." "Is that okay?" "Thanks." "Once upon a time..." "I can see Lindsay smiling, he's heard this." "Once upon a time, there was a little girl with a big ambition." "She wanted to become a stage actress." "And she had the great good àortune to meet a wonderàul man, whom she married, and who helped her, with his love and his dedication to become so." "And so, really, I'd just like to say to all those other little girls with big ambitions, là you have the love and the dedication, as I did, then all you need is luck." "I was simply lucky enough to have been born with the most colossal talent." "Thank you so much." "Thank you." "(SHOUTING AND CLAMOURING)" "(GAVEL POUNDING)" "SPEAKER:" "Order!" "Order!" "Order!" "MALE MP:" "What I want to know is why is there only one Monopolies Commission?" "Anyway, that's my diet gone to blazes." "I didn't know you were on a diet, Alan." "Not any more, I'm not, Bernard." "No." "(CHUCKLING)" "I'm not surprised." "Your lovely lady wife cooks a super supper." "Yeah?" "That really was a super supper, Sue." "Thank you so much." "Thank you, Bernard." "Come and sit down beside me." "Yes, that was very nice, darling." "Lovely wine." "Cigar, Bernard?" "Thankee, thankee." "Tell you what." "Why don't the pair of you come round to Ingleside and we'll give you a slap-up in return?" "What do you say?" "Well, you don't cook, do you, Bernard?" "No, when Mary gets out of hospital, I mean." "Look, I'll sit down here on this, then, shall I?" "Nonsense!" "Ben will take the pouf, won't you?" "Okey-doke, there you go." "Alan, coffee." "Yes, darling, that'll be lovely." "Thank you so much." "So anyway, Ben." "Right." "I'll make it, shall I?" "Look, if you want any help in the kitchen, Sue, I'm sure Ben can lend a paw." "Oh, no, no." "That's all right, Bernard." "We just bang it in the Colston, you know." "Oh, they're marvellous, those dishwashers, aren't they?" "Yeah." "Ours is in hospital at the moment." "Whoops!" "Sexist!" "So, any old way, Ben, what are you doing with yourself now?" "I must say, Bernard, he's grown out of all proportion." "You know, I remember when you used to bring him down to the Royal Oak in his pram." "Do you remember that, Ben?" "I bet you do, eh, do you?" "Hm?" "Ben, um..." "Ben wants to be an actor, don't you, Ben?" "Lot of actors out of work, Ben." "Just what I tried to tell him, Alan." "Would he listen?" "No, thank you." "Tell you what, though." "Sue and I happen to be fairly chummy with one of the usherettes at the Peterborough Quay Theatre." "We could maybe put in a good word for you." "I mean, you never know, it's worth a try, isn't it?" "Well, there you are." "You see, Ben?" "Thanks a lot, Alan." "Well..." "I must say, I never knew you were a man of the theatre." "Oh, yes!" "We always go up and see the Ayckbourn, you know." "Oh, he's marvellous, Ayckbourn, isn't he?" "Yeah." "Well, I've never actually seen any of his things, but I like him." "I think he's brilliant, Bernard." "He is quite, quite brilliant." "I've taken Sue to see all of his plays twice." "It really is uncanny." "It's almost as if you were holding up a microscope." "Alan, have you seen the After Eights?" "The what?" "The After Eights." "I left them in the dining room." "Whoops-a-didley-dandy-dee." "Um, yeah, well, there weren't that many left, Sue." "I did have a couple." "Sue, I was just telling Bernard how much you adore Ayckbourn." "I don't." "Oh, Sue, you're such an old reactionary." "So, any all way, Ben." "Got many girlfriends, then, have you?" "I bet you have, you old devil, have you?" "No, actually, I'm..." "No, Ben hasn't got anyone in particular at the moment, have you, Ben?" "He's just cruising, er, looking around, you know." "Playing the field, as it were." "(BERNARD CLEARING THROAT)" "Yeah, well, there's plenty of time, isn't there?" "Right." "Yeah." "I started late myself, which is just as well for you, Alan." "Or I might have found Sue first." "(BOTH GIGGLING)" "Sue." "Woof, woof!" "How is Mary?" "Oh, Mary's fine." "Well, I mean, it's a holiday for her, really, isn't it?" "Right." "There are always plenty of magazines in hospitals, aren't there?" "Right." "Have you any idea why she tried to kill herself?" "It was an accident, Sue." "Let's play a game, shall we?" "That's a good idea." "Let's do that." "What's that one where everybody hunts for a slipper?" "Oh, yes." "Hunt the Thimble." "Yes." "That's the one." "Why don't we play charades?" "Charades, is that the acting one?" "Oh, right." "Well, bags I go with Ben then, eh?" "No, no, no, no." "I'll go with Ben." "Right then, Alan." "All right." "You come over here." "We'll team up, for goodness sake." "Okey-doke." "Listen, what was that film we all went to see the other day?" "Oh, yes!" "It was called Ordinary something." "Ordinary..." "Ordinary..." "Ordinary People!" "BOTH:" "Ordinary People." "Ready." "Coming or not?" "So, if I give the first one to you, Ben, then you act it to Sue." "Sue, you're not to listen, okay?" "Are you ready, Ben?" "Come over here." "Now, then, what we've chosen for you is a film." "It's got two words." "And it's Ordinary People." "Ordinary People." "Two words." "Best of luck." "(STAMMERING) Wait!" "You can't start yet." "You got to be timed." "Oh, yes, timing." "We'll go by my Swiss one, shall we?" "Right you are, yeah." "Now!" "Film." "Two words." "The whole thing." "Ordinary People?" "That was good." "Sue, you were listening." "I wasn't listening, Alan." "(SCOFFING) Listening." "Well, you must have been listening." "How on earth does that mean Ordinary People?" "Yeah." "It's us, it's ordinary people." "(BERNARD SCOFFING)" "You can speak for yourself there, Sue." "Yeah, right." "Well, you go then." "Ben, you give me what you've chosen." "Okay." "What have you got for me then, Ben?" "Let's think." "Dog." "Is that it?" "Yes, it's a play." "Dog." "All right." "Alan and I have got a kind of telepathy running between us." "It shouldn't take too long." "Yes, this might be a little bit tricky, actually, Bernard." "It's one of those modern things, isn't it, Ben?" "That's all right, I've seen his bookshelves." "I know them all." "Oh, you have." "Good." "Are you ready?" "Yes, ready." "Off you go." "Right." "Right, so it's a book." "Oh, I mean a film, sorry." "Oh, no." "Oh, it's a television show." "(MUMBLING)" "A radio show?" "Oh, it's a bookshelf." "No, um..." "Ballet?" "Ballet..." "Uh, um..." "Opera?" "Operetta?" "Time!" "Time?" "Time's up, I'm afraid." "Look, he doesn't even know what that means!" "We can't start till he knows what that means, can we?" "It's a play, Bernard." "That's a play, Bernard." "A play?" "Yes." "Why?" "It's the curtains opening, Bernard." "Otherwise you wouldn't be able to see what was going on, would you?" "SUE:" "Alan!" "I'm sorry." "He said he knew." "Why don't we start again?" "We'll start again." "Off you go." "Right." "So it's a play." "One." "One..." "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest." "Erm, one man..." "Oh, I..." "I, Claudius." "(ALAN MUMBLING)" "Claudius The God?" "One, one, one..." "One word!" "One Word!" "One Word." "Oh, one word title." "One word title, play." "Sorry, Alan." "All right." "Cat On A Hot Tin Rooà." "One." "Um..." "Dog Day Aàternoon." "Yes." ""Afternoon" plus..." "Well, could you nod when I'm getting warm?" "For Christ's sake, Alan!" "It's not difficult, Bernard!" "A Tale Oà Two Cities." "(ALAN MUMBLING)" "One." "One." "Um, um..." "Cock O' The North." "Juno And The Paycock?" "Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory?" "It's a dog, you stupid bastard!" "You lose, Alan." "You're not allowed to talk." "(POP BALLAD INTRO PLAYING ON KEYBOARD)" "# Sitting all alone on my bed in my bedsit" "# Staring at the bullets on the floor" "# Magazine women all over the walls" "# And a bull's-eye on the door" "# Open my suitcase" "# Take my pick" "# Squeeze on the trigger" "# Feel the hammer go click" "# I'm going to shoot somebody famous" "# I'm going to shoot somebody big" "# I smile at the picture of John on the wall" "# So many to go, George, Ringo and Paul" "# I'm going to shoot somebody dead" "# Photographs of famous people strewn all around me" "# Just a blindfold and a pin so I can choose" "# Politicians laughing at me through the camera" "# But I am their judge and I accuse" "# I àix the time" "# I àix the place" "#Just need the courage" "# To show the world my àace" "# Staring at my àists" "#As I sit in the darkness" "# Waiting àor the hour I àeel is right" "# I'm just about to leave when I begin to cry soàtly" "# Someday I swear I'll go but not tonight" "# Close up my suitcase" "# Begin to wait" "# So many people" "# So many people to hate" "# Someday I'll shoot somebody famous" "# Someday I'll shoot somebody big" "# I've got to do better than shoot the Pope" "# Assassinate God, it's my only hope" "# Someday I'll shoot somebody dead #" "(SPEAKING GIBBERISH)" "Now, that's a lot of nonsense and you know it." "My darling, you're looking pale." "I am pale." "Don't say that, my darling, don't even think it." "You're going to be well, as well as anything." "I sometimes think I never shall be well." "You must prepare yourself, my dear, faithful darling, for the possibility that I shall never be well." "But my darling, what can you mean?" "The doctors..." "Doctors?" "What do they know?" "But, my peach..." "No, my dear." "If it's not to be, I shall be like this always." "A useless invalid." "Oh, never, my dear." "Never." "Never, never, never!" "You can be well, but only you can do it." "I read some more of your poems again last night." "They're so rare, so fine." "So absolutely fantastic." "Fantastic?" "Absolutely fantastic." "How fantastic?" "Oh, fantastically fantastic." "My dear, you're so talented, you have so much to offer." "Do you really think so?" "Yes, really." "Why, my dear, you're becoming really quite famous." "People might..." "People!" "What do people know?" "Oh, Robert, if only you understood how weak I felt." "I do feel so desperately weak." "Oh, but my darling, you must be strong." "You can be strong." "Be strong." "Be strong for me, Elizabeth." "Can you be strong for me?" "Be strong for me." "Take my hand and walk with me to the window." "Take your hand and walk with you to the window?" "Robert, what are you saying?" "My darling, you can do it." "Oh, Robert, if Daddy saw me?" "Oh, daddies, what do they know?" "Darling, don't say that." "It hurts me when you say that." "Daddy is good and kind and fine." "Yes, but you're going..." "You're going to marry me, Elizabeth." "You're not going to marry Daddy." "I am going to marry you, darling, aren't I, when I'm strong and well?" "Help me to be strong." "I do so desperately want to be strong." "It'll be such heaven when I'm well and strong again." "I will marry you and write more of my poems." "More of your absolutely fantastic poems." "More of them, yes." "You will help me, won't you, Robert?" "I'm so afraid." "So very afraid." "But my darling, you must be brave." "Every day I pray to God..." "God!" "What does He know?" "Oh, don't talk like that, my autumn rose." "It pains me when you speak so." "Come, take my hand and walk with me to the window." "Be brave and come with me." "Must I?" "Yes, you must and then you will be well." "Well, oh, how I wish I were." "If you wish you were, then come." "But I cannot, Robert." "Yes, you can, my Elizabeth." "I'm so desperately weak." "Come, take my hand, for me." "I'm so desperately afraid." "Put your hand in mine, I beg you." "But I cannot come." "My darling, if you take my hand and walk with me to the window," "I promise, I promise..." "Yes?" "I promise to whip you senseless." "(LIGHT POP MUSIC PLAYING)" "# Come join us in the noblest of causes" "# The battle for national improvement" "# The creaking of leather and uniforms" "# Is the hymn of a British Movement" "# We promise you riches and prosperity" "# Employment for the British working man" "# We promise you holidays in America" "# On exchange with the Ku Klux Klan" "# Eliminate the Paki, exterminate the blackie" "# Pull out this disease by the roots" "# The British Movement Government would repatriate the immigrant" "# To the tramp of Union Jack boots" "# Children in football grounds and classrooms" "# Are paraded in tidy rank and file" "# Incited to multiracial aggro" "# Exhorted by the war cry Sieg Heil!" "Sieg Heil!" "# Imagine our society with skinheads roaming wild and free" "# And not a pair of thick lips in sight" "# Fumigate the Underground And sterilise the cricket ground" "# White hope and white elephant" "# Whitewash and white Christmas" "# White horse and white rich and white poor" "# White dirt and white liquorice" "# White helmets, white truncheons" "# White face and white Willie Whitelaw #"