"Auntie, come here Grannie is not well" "I'm a failure I got beaten by Mum" "I got beaten by the fact of life by fate" "Mum shouldn't have died" "It was my fault" "My stubbornness killed her" "I killed her" "I just could not accept it" "At one stroke of fate" "I lost my dear mother" "I just could not understand why there are so many things about life simple facts of life that I can't figure out" "As Mum aged" "I drifted further away from her" "I left her to a helper's care" "I travelled a lot, entertained a lot" "Otherwise, I was busy at work and at home" "I thought she should be all right in the hands of a helper" "You know what my position is on this" "This is too stressful" "I have not been able to sleep for days" "No." "You've got to take responsibility" "Withdraw the book from the shelves" "Or else, I'll call off the deal" "You're getting married!" "Congratulations" "You're the best person to judge" "Sure I'll be there." "Bye" "The light bulb in the dinning room is gone" "I'll fix it" "Where is your car?" "You have just come home Where are you going?" "I've got to go see Mum" "My driver is off duty already" "Got this today for you." "Try on" "Mum" "Grannie, Auntie is here Hello" "Not the phone." "She is here" "Who is this?" "Grannie, it's your own daughter" "Can't you recognize your own daughter?" "Let me get you the letter from Shubao" "Mum, you have a funny gait" "What?" "Walk properly" "Oh, I just got up My joints are a bit stiff" "There's no mail from Shubao" "Grannie is acting funny these days" "She talks to the cat" "I have double vision lately" "Like now, I see two of you" "And at night I see people moving about" "Once I saw your daughter in three" "At first, I was scared" "Now I'm used to it" "Mum, you didn't eat much" "I can't taste anything these days" "I used to have a very good appetite" "Now, I just don't enjoy eating" "And I'm thirsty all the time" "Did you have salty food?" "She had gone downhill so quickly" "She got older every time I saw her" "Her health was deteriorating rapidly" "Mum, your favourite comedian is on TV soon" "I was not a good daughter" "I walked out of her life when she needed me most" "May I ask you something, Dr. Wong?" "Sure" "My mother's got cataract" "Her eyesight is poor" "Her doctor said she can't be operated on until the lens becomes completely cloudy" "But it's been years now" "Her vision is almost zero" "Shouldn't the lens be cloudy by now?" "There could be another problem" "Like a tumour pressing on the optical nerve" "How come her doctor never thought of that?" "Definitely an oversight on his part" "If only he looked into it deeply" "Simply the cataract should not reduce her vision to almost zero" "It seems to me it has more to do with the brain" "Or pressure on the optical nerve" "You should take your mother to have a thorough check-up" "Yue, grab that taxi" "Where to?" "To the hospital" "Mum, stay still" "We'll have the report in a few days" "Meanwhile take the medicine as prescribed" "She's got infection in the urinary tract" "Do you mind if I cook something?" "Takes only a few minutes" "Why would I mind?" "I don't want to come near that thing" "I fear I might smash it or something" "You can't It's not paper glued together" "Look, isn't it brilliant?" "Indeed" "Can you see?" "Put my glasses on" "My correction is worse than yours" "Just try" "Essence of Caterpillar Fungus" "Come on, you're seeing things" "Yue, remember" "Keep these out of the way" "Have you taken the food allowance that I gave Yue?" "No, I haven't" "Then what is this?" "You call this food?" "How can you eat this?" "They are all off" "These things give you heat" "Make your constipation worse" "Don't get mad" "I'll stop it" "Yue, what's that for?" "For wiping the bottom" "Why don't you use toilet paper?" "No wonder you get infection" "Oh I sterilise them every few days" "They are all right" "Toilet paper is a waste of money" "It costs several dimes a roll" "I can't waste your money" "You can't use them even if you sterilise them every day" "You are not using them anymore" "Don't throw them away" "A few dimes won't make me a millionaire" "Whatever you do won't make me rich" "Even if you stop eating you won't stop me from spending on you" "You are such a handful" "No wonder Dad never liked you" "No one can put up with you" "What a temper" "The tumour in her brain is quite big" "It has to be removed right away" "Her brain cells are also shrinking rapidly" "But the surgery might make it worse" "What is the prognosis?" "Senile dementia" "She might even become a vegetable" "Have you come across similar cases?" "In the worst cases we had patients who were not able to recognise anyone" "One even ate her own faces" "One picked food from garbage" "Isn't there a cure?" "We can remove the tumour" "But we can't stop the brains cells from dying" "What should we do?" "Check her in right away" "In my memory, she had never been sick" "Even when she was she took care of herself" "I never took much care of her" "I had to pull a lot of strings to get her admitted to that specialist hospital" "Doesn't it cost over 10,000 yuan?" "It does But I have no choice" "We've just paid Shubao's tuition" "You should try to get a loan" "I can't ask for a loan from my subordinates" "How long does this trip take?" "I'll be back in a month" "I came to say goodbye" "I'm going to the hospital tomorrow" "I wonder if I can see you again" "Of course you can" "You'll be up and about very soon" "Come have a seat" "They said it is a minor surgery" "How's your new apartment coming along?" "Fine" "Have you been there to see?" "Not yet There's a lot of work being done" "We'll move there as soon as I get out of the hospital" "Your writer daughter is wonderful" "She sent you granddaughter to study in the U. S" "And she takes such good care of you" "I envy you You have your family around you" "My daughter does take care of me" "But she is always so busy" "I try not to bother her with anything" "If I need help I'd rather come to you" "Anything we can do, just let me know" "Could you take care of my cat?" "She is well trained Pisses only in the bowl" "Don't worry." "We'll take care of her" "This admission business is not easy" "She must be stressed out by this" "She's pulled a lot of strings you know" "This is so difficult even for her" "Can't imagine what the poor people can do" "All set" "This must have cost you a lot" "I must have broken your bank" "Stop imagining things" "You have more imagination than a writer" "Too much hassle" "What do I do now?" "What do I do in a school?" "Shall I sit on the sofa or what?" "I'm discombobulated" "This is a hospital, not a school" "You are a patient." "You lie down" "Make yourself comfortable" "Your mother's physical condition and her preparation for the surgery don't look good" "She might not be able to survive it" "That's why we seldom operate on people over 80" "The general anaesthesia may knock her out for good or damage her brain permanently" "You've got to think twice" "If you insist to go ahead we'll do all possible to cure her" "Without the operation how long can she live?" "A month or two perhaps" "Or a year or two" "The operation does not help much" "Without it, she just goes blind" "You're terrifying me I can't sign this now" "Can't you talk to your family first?" "No" "Her daughter is in the U. S" "Her husband may give his opinion" "But it is her who calls the shot eventually" "I can't make up my mind" "What would you do if it were your own mother?" "I will talk to my mother" "No patient can take that dose of reality" "My mother is a strong person" "Wait." "Since Director Luo agrees to take the case he knows he can do it" "No surgeon wants to kill his patient" "It's his job to give you the worst case scenario" "What if something goes wrong" "What if we forget the surgery?" "The tumour may rupture, and bleed" "She may get a stroke, or go blind it'll be too late to operate on her then" "But Dr. Luo said the surgery can only stop her from going blind" "He said my mother's brain is like tofu anyway" "The brain cells are indeed dying" "But it is sclerosis" "The surgery is not making holes in her brain" "When the frontal lobe is held up it is held up by soft instruments" "We don't hold it up with bare hands" "What if she becomes a vegetable?" "It might happen when both frontals are turned over" "But we'll do only her right frontal" "So it's not likely to happen..." "What to do now?" "Shall I go ahead?" "She is so old" "What if she can't survive it?" "Well, it's your decision" "I don't know what to do" "You never listen to me anyway" "I couldn't lie to my mother" "She always knew my mind" "You can do without the surgery" "It can save only your eyesight" "I can be your eyes if you go blind" "Though the doctors said the brain surgery is a minor one your age compounds the situation" "You don't have to take the risk" "I do I insist" "I want to live with some quality of life" "I'll sign the papers if I have to" "You cannot" "Listen to your mother, for a change" "So I have never listened to you" "This only proves that I have been wrong..." "Put it behind us." "Don't dig up dirt" "I'll talk to the surgeon" "I want my life back I want the surgery" "We'll consider your wish" "Thank you" "You have just become part of my family" "I knew she was not going to live forever" "But if the surgery could make her live just a bit longer and better we'd take the chance" "Oh, I miss you so much" "Can you come home?" "I can't." "Exams are coming up" "Are you all right, Mum?" "Nan misses you" "Your going away has traumatised her" "But she is O.K., isn't she?" "How are you?" "I miss you a lot Otherwise, I'm fine" "I'll come home after the exams" "Take care I love you too Bye" "I am lucky to have a daughter like you and a good granddaughter" "Both of you are so good to me" "Makes all the hardship worthwhile" "Let's have a talk" "Shubao is going to get married next year" "She wants all of us to go to the U.S. For her wedding" "So you've got to make a nice suit for me" "Chinese style top" "And an ankle length skirt" "When we go there we'll tour around" "Eat properly when the family is not around" "You are a big girl now with a brilliant daughter" "I have nothing to worry about" "Time heals all wounds" "I've been lonely all my life I know" "Shall I get Shubao to come to see you?" "No, She's only starting her new life" "In any case, the air ticket is costly" "She's got studies to do" "I'll be around for at least 5 years won't I?" "If something terrible happens to me tell Shubao to stay put" "Her coming back can't change anything" "I don't want her to risk air travel" "Tell your daughter as long as she is obedient to you" "I'll lie in peace" "Oh, Mother Come now" "Don't cry" "We all die sooner or later" "I can't die I've got to look after you" "Bathing Mum was a pleasure" "After every bath Mum looked so clean and so fresh" "She had this content in her smile" "Her happy face was proof of the old saying" "Good fortunes come with age" "I became more guilty conscious of leaving Mum to someone else's care" "My parents are on the way" "I have sent a car to fetch you so you can meet them at the station" "I can't Why did you bring them over now?" "I can't stop them from coming to see me" "My mother is going under the knife tomorrow" "I may not able to see her again" "Couldn't you be a bit more considerate?" "I'll take them around when they are here" "Patient No.3 you have to get up soon for the preparation and shaving" "What is that?" "We've got to shave you" "Go get your Auntie here quick" "She is not around" "Well, find her" "She said she would be back soon" "Nurse, my daughter is not here" "We don't need your daughter" "Are you going to shave it all off?" "Of course, for the surgery" "Get yourself ready for it" "Yue, get a camera" "I want to take a picture before I go bald" "Hurry up" "When the barber shows up it'll be too late" "Grannie wants some shooting" "Shooting what?" "Pictures" "What's the number?" "A little bit to your left" "Move, to your left" "O. K, now, stay still" "Stop" "Let's get outside, under the sun" "Don't move3, 2, done Good" "There you are, your picture" "Shake it for a few minutes it'll come alive" "High tech" "A pretty good picture that was Thank you" "It's been 8 hours" "Where is the image?" "I shouldn't have gone outside" "The sun has melted it" "I'm sorry we caused you trouble" "No trouble at all We're delighted" "Is your mother well?" "She's fine" "Is she still living in that house?" "She'll be moving soon" "I haven't seen her for 6 years" "I look forward to seeing her again" "Do some sightseeing first" "Beijing has changed a lot over these years" "I'll take you to see Mum later" "Great." "I've brought her a lot of stuff" "How do I look?" "Bald" "Help me to the washroom" "Are you afraid of the surgery?" "No, not at all." "It's." "God's will" "Do I look like your grandpa?" "You sure do" "Can you get me a mirror?" "You'll be fined for looking into a mirror" "No way" "You are as pretty as ever" "I have never seen an 80-year old as smart and pretty as you are" "I have not left you any fortunes" "You gave me a life" "That's the best legacy" "The next day she'd go under the knife" "She didn't mention a word about her fears" "Not a word" "I was relieved that she was not nervous" "However, the way she accepted her fate and her possible departure made me sad" "Don't worry" "You've got your favourite Dr. Luo here" "If it hurts, bear it with a grin Don't scream" "If you terrify the doctors" "It's no good for the surgery" "The anesthesiologist might want to give you a heavy dose" "You can't go in" "Relax, Mum" "The operation went very well" "It was over in two hours" "Till this day I can clearly remember how Dr. Luo's face glowed with excitement" "Auntie" "It went very well" "Thank you so much" "Mum, can you see me?" "She looks so blue" "That's normal" "That's blood clots that can't be sucked out" "What is that dent on her skull?" "That's normal too" "Some patients got a big lump where we drill the skull" "You've got to be fair" "She is my only child" "This marriage is against my will" "Why did you give me these pants?" "The drainage bag should be higher" "You're draining too much out of her" "Look at me" "Remember me?" "Thank you, sir" "Let her rest Call me if anything comes up" "Of course I remember him" "He is the headmaster of the primary school" "Does your head hurt?" "No" "Do you feel queasy?" "No" "How many fingers are there?" "Three" "And this?" "Four" "You should not have stripped me" "And lay me on that table" "You are my daughter" "You shouldn't have made me an idiot" "I'm really upset with you" "That was for the operation" "We've got to prepare you for it" "I'm not upset with the doctors Don't you see?" "Stay in bed, Mum" "If you fall, you'll be in trouble" "Do you want to have some congee?" "I am dying to have anything" "Why didn't you say so earlier?" "The doctors were all over me just now" "I can't eat while they are here" "They might be hungry too" "I can't eat when the headmaster is not eating." "If I can't bear it any longer" "I can eat some of the computer" "How I want to get off the bed" "Just stand on your own feet" "You can do it" "There you are" "There's nothing wrong with your feet" "You are recovered" "You just need some exercise" "Don't push She's just had an operation" "How old is she?" "80" "And she survives an operation Amazing" "Everything went so well" "Most patients have edema hematoma" "Infection or fever after the operation" "You have none of that" "I did have a temperature 37.5 degress" "But it went down" "Both of us were blown away by the success" "In hindsight, it was in fact the prelude to something disastrous" "I was so thrilled about the recovery" "That I thought it was a piece of my work" "What do I know about the twists and turns of life" "Get out of here quick The place is haunted" "Come on, girl Move" "Go" "That's for your own good" "What do you mean" "I didn't tell the truth?" "Look here" "I have told you everything" "What's wrong with the computer?" "It is writing something ...about rice" "Mum, are you all right?" "Yes" "I feel awful" "I have to wee" "I can't do it" "Just squeeze your legs" "Squeeze harder Come on" "Hold me" "Oh, no What?" "Got caught" "Don't pull my legs so hard" "Do you really have to go every minute?" "Why are you doing this to me?" "Can't you hold longer?" "Can't you wait?" "I can't do it" "Forget it" "Use the potty" "I want to turn on my right" "I want to turn on my right" "I need to go" "Piss into the pot" "No I need to go to the toilet" "I need to go to the toilet" "I'll go by myself" "Hold it for a while" "Don't go until you can't hold anymore" "You'd get into the habit of going every minute" "Was she senile or was she not?" "If she hadn't lost her mind why did she torture me?" "If she was senile how come she knew how to pee into the pot?" "I don't feel well" "I don't feel well" "I'm talking to you." "I need to turn" "I've just straightened the covers" "Nice and tidy over the quilt" "Look what you've done" "Can't you pull the whole thing up?" "I want only one side of it" "You'll fall off the bed" "This is like a jail I don't want it" "Don't want it" "What if you fall?" "This is like being in a jail" "I'm out of here" "When you come to your senses I'll come back" "If you don't, I'm not coming back Never" "It's raining out there" "Dress warm before you go" "Bring me a bottle of cough syrup" "Cursor" "We were both damned" "I was no longer my mother's daughter" "She was no longer my beloved mother" "She did not mean to make me suffer" "She herself was torn by the decease" "If only I knew her days were numbered" "Even though I could not make her live longer" "I could at least make her life happier" "Is your mother getting better or not?" "She is only a ghost of her old self" "The doctors said it is normal" "Can't they give her tranquillisers?" "Or acupuncture?" "Nothing works" "I want my daughter" "Yue, go fetch your Auntie" "No one answered the phone" "Call her husband No answer" "Call her office" "Her colleagues should know where she is" "She must have gone out for dinner" "I don't know her office number" "Get the nurse to look it up" "Go" "Catch her before she leaves" "My girl" "What's all that noise?" "Oh, no." "The guard's here" "Get your Auntie here." "Quick" "If you stop shouting" "I'll call your daughter and get her here" "Oh, no." "I've got my daughter in trouble" "Don't touch it." "You'll upset Auntie" "She is my daughter." "Not your business" "Please, don't" "Your mother has made such a scene" "She's keeping everybody on edge" "You have to take her home" "But she is not fully recovered" "Come over here and sing me a song" "Sing" "I can't sing Sure you can" "I dashed here right away" "Almost got killed by the traffic" "Look, in the bus" "I almost tore the pants" "What did you call me here for?" "Do you want me to get killed?" "I'll do anything to make you well" "You've got me to take care of you now that you're old" "I have nobody to help me" "You can go to your daughter in the U. S" "I'm not going anywhere" "I've got you today's papers" "There is a picture of you" "Mum, the doctors have important things to do" "You don't bother them with small stuff" "They don't have time to do that" "When you have a real case of emergency they'd think you are just acting up" "See?" "Your Auntie" "She makes things happen" "Don't sweet talk me" "You don't know how many strings I pulled" "I need some water Who's going to get it for me?" "I need more" "It's not my fault" "I don't sleep well at night" "The fact is you stay up all night" "When you sleep, you are comatose" "You don't take naps during the day" "And you don't go to sleep at night" "When you do sleep you don't get up for hours" "We can't wake you up" "Then you act up again" "From now on you should take naps in the day and go to bed early every night" "If you don't like lying in bed sit up in the sofa here" "Until you get drowsy, then go to bed" "You've got to make an effort" "I need to sit up" "Then put the jacket on" "Look what you've done" "Is that the sleeve?" "Is that the sleeve?" "Mum?" "God, you are such a handful" "Can't you give us a moment of peace?" "You do this day in day out" "Have a heart" "I can deal with it" "But Yue is stressed out by you" "If she gets fed up with you and leave" "What are you going to do?" "Are you going to leave me?" "No" "She said no" "The minute I walked in the hospital" "I was swarmed by staff complaining about you" "They don't want to keep you here" "The old house is gone" "The new apartment is not finished" "Where can you go?" "Tell me" "Do you want to live with my husband?" "Good girl please don't send me to him" "It's up to you" "The colour is too dark" "I don't like the style" "Are you going to France?" "Not when you are sick" "Sometimes I'd rather be sick" "That way you can spend more time with me" "The doctor in charge said she is well enough to be discharged" "Did you talk to my Mum?" "I did" "What did she say?" "Nothing much." "I let her rest" "Did you push the contractor?" "I should have in the beginning" "I thought they should deliver according to the contract" "When I called them the other day they kept stalling" "Saying it would be soon" "I told Mum we'd move her to the new unit" "What am I going to tell her now?" "Can't you at least give me some help?" "My hands are full with you, and Mum" "And I have books to write" "I am snowed under by all these going on" "Just take it easy" "Where can I put my mother up?" "Our place" "We won't leave her in the street" "She is frightened to live with anyone" "You know that" "Frightened of what?" "You writers do exaggerate" "Is our place haunted or what?" "Don't make such a fuss" "She can sleep on the couch" "Your husband gave me these" "All junk" "What do you think these are?" "Just junk given to him and then to you" "Hush, he can hear that" "So what?" "I don't care" "He has not done a thing to help" "Not a thing." "But complains" "Look you're always busy" "And lately, you spend all your time with me" "It is not fair to your husband" "After all, he is the man of the house" "What man of the house?" "I did everything, everything" "I don't just take care of cooking" "I take care of everything" "But he had a heart surgery before" "Mum, I'm over 50 years old" "I don't need you to tell me how to live my life" "Let me deal with my own business" "What a pain" "Her face does not look right" "The doctor said it is caused by blood clots" "I'll bring the car here" "The comedian" "No, he is our driver" "That is your new home" "Is it being renovated?" "Almost finished" "New floor, new furniture" "Air con with heat pump" "You are spending too much on me" "This is so good" "This is like heavens" "You sleep on the couch, Mum" "It's warmer here It's easier for you to get off" "What if I have an accident?" "I might soil it" "Don't worry" "You can use this" "I don't like this" "There's nothing wrong with it" "I'm regressing" "I definitely am" "You wetted your bed a lot when you were little" "Don't drink anymore" "I know when to stop" "This is a very nice wine" "No wonder he has it every evening" "That's it" "I don't want to get addicted to it" "Or fight with him over wine" "It's growing fast Feel it" "Yes, it is" "Soon, I can get rid of the wig" "Yue, open the door" "Mum, this cat is crazy" "She cries all the way here" "How is the new apartment coming along?" "It'll be finished in a week" "Two bedrooms" "I'll take the bigger one with lots of sunshine" "I need a recorder in the room" "Flowers outside the window and a few pets too" "Persian cats, thoroughbred" "I remember this place" "When I was 6, my father took me here" "He said I needed the exercise" "I still need the exercise" "I don't want to leave you" "If I am alone, I don't mind dying" "You'll live, Mum" "I won't let you leave us" "If I don't let you leave us you can't" "You're right" "Hello, where are you?" "Give it to me" "You'll catch cold" "Yue has bathed me" "You don't have to worry" "Is your mother's lifestyle rather sedentary?" "No" "It's just that she is old" "I've got her a helper to do the household chores" "That is not good for her" "Her mind is deteriorating fast" "To stop it, she needs to stay active" "Whatever she can do, let her do it" "The less she does the less alert she becomes" "When I taught my graduate students" "I pushed them really hard" "That's the idea of training" "The harder I pushed the more they learned" "The best help is to get them to help themselves" "Get the scissors" "Don't hang around here Do your cooking" "I'm dizzy" "What is this fancy thing?" "What is that for?" "Working out" "I look like an American" "You feel younger when you have this on" "Watch me" "Feet firmly on this" "Start from the lowest level" "And then walk steadily" "Mum, just walk slowly" "Is this speed good for you?" "I am afraid of machines" "It's good for you" "Look, hold the rail" "The legs, not so far apart" "It's slow" "The operation..." "Fine." "Don't do it Just waste away" "I'll do it I'll do it" "Yue, get out here" "Let her do it herself" "Mum, Shubao will be back by yearend" "Didn't she say that she would take you to all the restaurants in Beijing?" "If you don't work out you don't have the strength to go out with her" "The doctors said they could tell from the biopsy that you never exercised" "It is not good for your health" "You need to work out to be fit" "So please do it for me" "Stand up on your own" "The physical strength is crucial to your brain" "If you don't even try to get up by yourself you'll deteriorate" "And you'll deteriorate fast" "My husband's back" "He can see you from here" "Shut the door, Yue" "Shall I?" "You know the toilets in the plane are tiny" "Only one person can fit into it" "You know you have to go frequently" "What if you can't stand up and I can't go in to help you up?" "Yue, come in here and help me" "You are paid to help me" "You should listen to me not her" "Mum, I've been keeping the truth from you" "I must tell you now" "Take a look at this" "Take a look at this" "You've lost a lot of brain cells" "If you work out" "You may recover quite a few functions" "Otherwise, your brain will shrink" "But then, you'll lose your life too" "If you go on like this you'll die in 3 months, Mum" "Auntie" "Mum Oh, Mum" "Am I going to die?" "If you do what you are told you won't die" "Not that soon at least" "Can I give you a hand?" "No, I'll do it myself" "Let me help you" "Please don't do it anymore" "I've got to" "Your Auntie will be mad if I don't" "She won't" "Yes, she will" "Why don't you support me?" "Auntie said you've got to do it yourself" "I have to listen to her" "I'm too old for this" "If I knew it, I'd not have agreed to do the operation" "You'd better stop" "Yes" "I need to go to the bathroom" "Mum" "Don't hold her arm" "Let her walk by herself" "When she walks don't hold her by the arm." "Just follow closely behind it'll be all right" "Why is the pace so slow?" "You are walking too slow" "For her to get any benefit do it quickly" "The more exercise the longer one lives" "You guys are just acting" "You are not serious" "Come one." "Do it properly" "I'm sweating" "That's good for the system" "I've got to be careful not to fall" "If I trip" "I'll get you guys into trouble" "I'm walking faster by myself" "Of course I'll press charges" "Everything is in a mess" "What a pain" "Of course I'm taking care of myself" "Could you find out for me about that..." "Hello, are you there?" "Where's Mum?" "Gone out for a walk with Yue" "Where to?" "How do I know?" "The Writers' Association told me" "I have to go to Sweden for a week for an award ceremony" "I can't take care of your mother" "Can Yue manage?" "I've got something to ask you" "Have you read Foster's The Last Frontier?" "No" "What a shame" "If you go on like this you won't have a career" "Forget about presenting awards" "Weird" "What are you talking about?" "The nursery downstairs is looking for new business" "They have established caring for the aged" "They are doing well" "Why don't you send your mother there?" "All my life I had been helping others" "I seldom helped my mother" "I thought Mum would still be around for a long time" "She would be with me for years to come" "I was silly to think that she was still young" "I don't feel well today" "She does that all the time" "If you ask her what is wrong she'd say I am fine" "I think I'm sick" "There she goes again" "If you ask her she'd say there is nothing wrong again" "Mum, you are fully recovered from the surgery" "I trust science the doctors, not you" "Everything went so well in the OT" "You're being hypochondriac" "Right!" "What do I know?" "I had the best surgeon the best hospital" "I can't contest the fact" "I need to go to the toilet" "Don't help her" "She can do it herself" "Auntie" "I was so insensitive then" "I thought Mum was just being negative" "I betrayed her love for me" "I betrayed the bond we had" "My love had turned to hatred" "I hated Mum for her stubbornness" "Those thoughts tore us apart" "And tore me apart" "All my efforts would go down the drains" "There was nothing I could do to save her" "Think of it as your bed" "Learn to get up from it" "Stand up" "Mum just turn on your side" "This is the couch, isn't it?" "Lean on it and stand" "O.K., you don't want that" "Try something else" "Go there by yourself" "Let me carry you" "Let's start from the beginning" "We can discuss about this" "No" "Mum, this is the couch" "Look, put your arm on it" "Push, and you're up." "Try" "Yue, go to the kitchen" "You have no business here" "Try, Mum, try" "That is my bottom line" "Do you want me to take you?" "Yes, I'm at your doorstep" "You can stay" "I want to stay" "But I've got to say goodbye to my daughter" "Mum, don't go Mum" "Don't yell" "You gave me the goose bumps" "I was just tired." "I dozed off" "I'm going to live for a few more years" "Yes, alive and kicking" "You've got a way with words" "Why don't you try this?" "Look, turn this way and put your leg... there, there" "Turn." "See if you can sit up" "Pretend we are the couch." "Push" "There you are!" "Doesn't take a minute" "I know you can do it" "Didn't take a second" "It's your will, Mum You can do it if you want to" "I'm all wet" "I'll bathe you" "Don't" "Are you hungry, Mum?" "Mum probably knew then that she was going to die" "She didn't tell me because she knew that I was not able to accept the fact" "I was trying to run away from my mistake" "I couldn't deal with my mother's suffering" "A sense of guilt stopped me from reaching out to her" "I am so sorry, Mum" "I left some money in the pants" "Take it out before you wash them" "You did not put money in the pocket" "It is in the pocket" "The money is there, isn't it?" "I need money to get by" "You can have as much money as you want" "Come here" "I like this candy" "I have not had it for a long time" "Not bad" "Can you remember when you were discharged?" "On the 14th" "You have a better memory than I" "I forgot the date" "Water the flowers." "They are wilting" "I just watered them And they are not wilting" "Though I'm old" "I think you are better off if I live" "You have to live" "There is nothing for me in this world without you" "I'll work on standing on my own" "Good" "That's enough" "Don't you want me to try?" "Yes, but you'll get worn out" "Do you know why I do this?" "You know life has been difficult for me" "I'll make sure when Shubao returns home she can have a good time with you" "Take you to places" "She'll be home soon" "By then we can move to the new flat" "We can go boating." "We can go to parks" "Go shopping and get you a new suit" "You look at the foreign old ladies" "They all wear colourful clothes" "You should wear colourful clothes too" "You can make dumplings again for us" "Oh, I miss your dumplings" "Mum, if you want to do all this" "You've got to regain some strength" "The surgery was perfect" "It is meant for you to live for a few more years" "So from now on, work with me" "Could you, Mum?" "I know you care about me" "And I shall persevere" "Why don't you kiss me anymore?" "Oh, Mother" "Why are you awake?" "I had an accident" "It's all right" "Do you want to go?" "Yes" "What is that fire?" "You've lost it again, Mum" "Why don't you install railings here?" "Then I can get up without you helping me" "We'll move in a few days" "The new flat has everything you need" "I don't want to go to bed" "Are you going away in a few hours?" "Let's talk for a while" "No, you go to sleep We'll talk tomorrow" "Tomorrow will be cold" "Make sure you dress warm for the trip" "You are such a worry" "Stop nagging." "Just go to sleep" "She asked me" "If she was going to live to 100 years old" "I said, Of course you can You are so fit" "She said she wanted to go to the U. S" "For Shubao's wedding" "She said she could take care of the great grandchildren" "Most of Shubao's classmates have become mothers" "I was time for Shubao to get married, she said" "She knew you are not happy in your second marriage" "And you always have your own ideas" "She was sad" "She said when we got to her age we'd understand her" "She knew you were depressed sometimes" "But you should learn to let go" "Otherwise you would go mad, she said" "She wept for you" "She said travelling was good for you" "But then air travel was so risky" "The contractor called" "The flat is finished" "Shall we all go and have a look?" "I'll go then" "My girl" "Mum" "Auntie, look who's here" "No, not the phone" "Who is this?" "Mum"