"The lady wants me to let you go, jeff." "You'd better take advantage of it and leave" "Before someone comes up with a better idea." "Poor christian..." "He loves roxanne and just can't tell her." "Imagine cyrano quitting a girl for another man, it's laughable." "Laughable?" "At the paris premier the tears of the ladies in the boxes" "Drenched the people sitting in the orchestra below them." "Darling, please tell us how it ends." "Be a dear, paladin." "It ends as all good plays should" "Early enough to leave some of the evening for talk," "And some for wine..." "And some for one thing or another." "Why, mr." "Paladin..." "Excuse me." "My name is chris sorenson, and I'm direct." "I noticed." "I could use a man like you." "I'm direct too, what for?" "Look, you could teach me something..." "The way you talk to the ladies..." "As if they were..." "How do you talk to the ladies?" "Oh, I don't." "I can talk with my fists and guns..." "But I can't use either of those on maria." "Women do inhibit a man." "You see maria..." "She just came over from Spain, and inherited the ranch next to mine." "I followed her here tonight hoping, you know..." "I'm doing just as badly in the city as I did back at the ranch." "Your problem is not a unique one." "I wish you luck." "I'll pay you a $1000 dollars you teach me how to talk to her and..." "Teach me how to..." "Well you know." "Is that maria?" "Yeah." "I'm sorry, I'd like to help you, but it's really not in my line, you see..." "I didn't know you were a professional gunfighter." "Well, doggone it, I've got to do something." "If your pain is that acute, I suppose the least I can do is get you started." "Excuse me." "Señora...?" "I still can't get over the way you waltzed right up" "To señorita de castro and invited her to dinner." "That was for you." "You were supposed to take over at that point." "I never know what to say to her." "With you along, everything is going to be fine." "Hey, where is everybody?" "!" "Clem, I want you to meet mr." "Paladin." "Bud, this is mr." "Paladin." "Bud." "It's about time you're back, chris." "Something happened on the roundup that..." "It can wait." "We've got company for dinner tonight." "The de castro's." "The lager is kind of low..." "We drove past enough raw material to cook a banquet fit for a queen." "All I've got is beans and biscuits." "There's a swamp back there that's bursting with wild rice." "That stuff's fit only for the indians." "Indians are the only ones who can afford it." "Bud, will you give this to your best shot, ask him to bring down some pheasant." "Send somebody to pick the mushrooms that grow out at the foot of the mountain." "Clem, we're going to need flowers, lots of flowers." "Well, you heard what he said, and from now on..." "Mr. Paladin is a ramrod around here." "And you start polishing up your manners the way I told you." "Señorita de castro..." "Well, come on..." "Come off it, will ya, chris?" "...Señorita, mi casa..." "Chris!" "Chris, will you listen to me!" "I gotta talk to you." "If it's about business..." "It is about business." "While you were off chasing that girl, we ran into some trouble on our roundup." "Whatever it is, you handle it." "I would if I knew how." "Look, you know we had a pretty fair idea of how many head we'd find." "What's the trouble, we come up short?" "No, that's the trouble." "There's about 300 more steers than we figured on." "You call that trouble?" "It is!" "Because the de castro outfit claims they've been missing about 300 head." "Bud, forget it!" "For the first time in my life, I found me somebody I want." "Everything else can go hang until she settles with me one way or another." "So just forget it." "We gotta do something about him." "Mi casa es suya." "Bienvenidos." "Apparently he can't worry about more than one problem at a time." "Well, this whole cattle problem is gonna blow up in his face." "Jeff brewer tried inspecting our herd." "If I hadn't stepped in, there'd have been some shooting." "Chris." "Bud's worried." "He's always worried." "There's one thing worrying me now though..." "When you decoy the aunt outside, and maria and I are alone," "What do I do?" "Talk about the play." "What play?" "Cyrano de bergerac." "The one you saw in san francisco." "Then what?" "You sit back, relax, and listen." "She'll tell you everything." "It works like magic." "All you have to do is nod your head and smile..." "Uh-huh..." "And she'll think you're the smartest man in the whole world." "Ho!" "It's not too late to turn back." "Why are you so anxious for me not to attend this dinner party?" "Sorenson's ranch is a pigsty, not fit for ladies." "Inviting you like this shows he's got something up his sleeve." "I'm sure he knows about our missing cattle." "Please maria, let us take mr." "Brewer's advice and go back." "Aunt anna, I am paying mr." "Brewer to run my ranch, not my social life." "Well, go ahead!" "You can't keep her waiting out there." "Bienvenidos." "Buenos noches." "Mi casa es suya." "May I assist you in removing your wraps?" "Thank you." "This is charming." "But we were told..." "My aunt didn't expect to see such" "Exquisite taste on the prairie." "Well, it's a..." "Ah, it's..." "Strange things grow in strange places, don't they chris?" "Yeah, that's right." "Orchids grow on swampy jungles." "How clever of you, mr." "Sorenson." "I never thought of orchids that way." "Oh!" "Oh, very amusing, mr." "Sorenson." "Oh, wait a minute clem..." "How many times have I got to tell you?" "Red wine is for beef, and the white wine is for foul." "Now you go back to the kitchen and fetch the proper bottle." "Will you ladies excuse me for a moment, please?" "Jeff brewer and a couple of his boys are out in back" "Talkin' up trouble." "I tell ya, paladin, they're just begging for it." "Well, chris is busy." "It's easy enough to get a job on the sorenson spread." "All you need is to get yourself a runnin' iron and stick it in your hip pocket." "Then if you're the kind of man who don't mind altering a brand," "You cut the fence between your neighbor's ranch..." "Sort of help a few cattle through to your side." "That's enough." "If you have any complaints, come back tomorrow and we'll hear them." "Who are you?" "My name is paladin." "We're having a dinner party and we don't want any trouble." "Well, that's too bad, mister." "We didn't make this trouble." "But we don't figure to back a way from it." "That's fine, but come back in the morning." "I don't want to be put off again." "This outfit's been making free and easy with a running iron." "I'm not polite to a crowd of rustlers." "Paladin, I'm not gonna take it..." "Whoa." "All right." "Brewer." "All right." "All right, bud, put them in the wagon and sit on them until the ladies are ready to leave." "I don't want anything to disturb mr." "Sorenson's party." "What's the name of that darn play?" "Cyrano, cyrano de bergerac." "Cyrano de bergerac." "That's right." "Just ask her what she thinks of it, that's all." "She'll do the talking." "Breath of air?" "It'd go well after that dinner." "And I'd like very much to hear the news of Spain." "I haven't been there for five years." "Not so far, thank you." "I do have my charge." "And you're not the kind to shirk your responsibility." "Still I would like to hear the news from Spain." "There was something I wanted to say..." "Chris?" "Oh..." "What did you think of the cyrano de bergerac play?" "Will you excuse me?" "We have nothing but trouble." "Excuse me, señora." "She beat me to the punch, and asked me about the play first." "Take it easy." "What am I going to talk about now?" "Talk about your guns, how you shot all those trophies." "Why couldn't I think of that?" "I should be really inside with maria." "Señora, you were speaking of trouble." "Trouble on your ranch?" "...Hunting buffalo now." "Well there ain't much..." "There isn't much danger in that." "It's a..." "See that big brown bear?" "When you hunt these, it's very dangerous." "Señora, can you be more specific?" "What things go wrong?" "Everything." "Fences breaking, cattle disappear into thin air." "Here." "You just feel the weight of this one." "That is heavy." "Every day brings another trouble." "What did you do to her?" "The gun was loaded." "He kicked back like a horse." "I'm sure chris can explain." "It was an accident." "Gentlemen do not hunt in houses!" "We never should have set foot in this terrible place." "We are going home at once!" "Chris sorenson appears low, mr." "Paladin." "Maybe if you talked to that gal for chris." "No..." "I tried that once in dodge city, bud, and almost had to marry the girl myself." "Besides, chris and maria are proud." "If I spoke for chris, they'd end up hating me and each other." "No, he's gonna have to learn to talk for himself." "The only time I ever hear chris really sound off, is when he gets riled up." "Mornin', chris." "Mornin'." "It's too bad about last night." "Yeah, well, here's your money, paladin." "Thanks for the try." "Wait a minute." "The job's not done." "No use trying to whip a dead horse." "First make sure the horse is dead." "We gotta get you back in shape." "Bud, what needs doing?" "Well, some fences need mending." "Good." "Chris, take care of those fences." "What are you going to be doing?" "I'll be over at the de castro ranch." "Some fences over there need mending." "You ride beautifully." "I could ride before I could walk." "You must have heard of castilian horses?" "Best in the world." "Are those superb castilian horses." "So fiery, difficult to manage." "I've never been thrown." "Now look over there." "The vastness..." "The quiet, the beauty." "I think everything is perfect." "Hold on, maria!" "Runaway!" "Are you all right?" "That was wonderful, wild!" "Why did you stop me?" "You looked pale." "Do I?" "You're sure you're all right?" "Of course." "Very well, let's be on our way, shall we?" "Did you have a nice ride?" "Of course, thanks to my escort." "I'm glad you are back." "Mr. Brewer made us another offer to buy the ranch," "And I think you should sell it to him." "But I'm not sure whether I want to sell or not." "It's a fair price, ma'am." "Just you sign at the bottom and the deal is closed." "Please maria, this wilderness is no place for you." "May I see mr." "Brewer's offer?" "If you have any objections, mr." "Brewer, speak up." "No, got nothing to hide." "Suit yourself." "You got any doubts..." "I don't know the price of ranches in this area." "Suppose I ask chris sorenson, he'd know." "Well, perhaps that's something mr." "Sorenson might be good for." "I'll be back this evening with his opinion." "I don't mean to be pressing," "But you know, as well as I do, that this ranch has been plagued by trouble." "I'm sure everything you say is correct, mr." "Brewer." "But, I would not like to discuss it anymore until mr." "Paladin returns." "Aunt ana..." "Start a fire." "We're seeding our neighbor's herd with more stolen cattle tonight." "Tomorrow, we're gonna find some cattle with fresh altered brands" "In the sorenson herd." "You think they'll fight this time?" "We'll push them real hard." "Then lead them on to the de castro ranch and shoot it out." "That'll scare the ladies into selling..." "Quick." "You're the boss." "I will be." "Get that wood." "Just where do you get the gall to come back here, after what you did?" "What did you say?" "I saw you today with maria." "Did you?" "I trusted you, I thought you were my friend." "That was some sneaky trick you pulled." "What are you going to do about it?" "Well, nothing!" "You're the kind of man maria wants?" "All right!" "I can't be like you, so I quit." "And you can get out of here anytime!" "Chris!" "I thought that girl meant something to you." "Don't you say nothing now." "It wouldn't take much more." "We got nothing more to say to each other." "I can't afford to waste any time standing around here making conversation with you." "I've got a date." "You seeing' her tonight?" "Well, I'm seeing somebody." "Nine o'clock, and tonight, aunt ana won't be there." "Now hold on, just a minute now." "Maria 's not the kind of a..." "Would you intend to marry her?" "Marry?" "Well, she's a very pretty girl, but..." "Hmmph!" "Ha ha!" "Hey, what are you puttin' my brand on your cattle for?" "Thanks very much, chris, you saved me a lot of trouble." "You knew what they were going to do?" "Well, I knew they were trying to stir up enough trouble" "For maria to sell the ranch." "I spoiled it for ya, didn't I?" "I followed you here..." "And I was the one who caught them while you lay off in the dark back there." "You didn't..." "Yes, he did." "Yes you did, chris." "Do you think maria will ever believe you?" "Well we'll just see." "Get on your horses!" "Maria, there's something you gotta know." "Chris!" "You've been hurt, what happened?" "Well, these fellas here..." "Well..." "They a..." "They were a..." "Well, they were..." "Paladin here..." "He..." "Brewer's the cause of your trouble, maria." "Now that's a black lie." "Here's the branding iron I caught them using." "They were putting sorenson's brand on your cattle hoping to provoke a gun fight." "And that would scare you enough to leave the place." "Is that the truth, brewer, or would you like to call me a liar again?" "No." "No, it's the truth." "I can turn them over to the sheriff, if you'd like." "No, just tell them to go." "The lady choses to be lenient, brewer." "I'd take advantage of that if I were you," "Before somebody comes up with a better idea." "Now, is there anything else I can do for you ladies?" "Mr. Paladin, I cannot thank you enough for what you've done already." "Oh, but you can, maria." "For since I first saw you, I've been longing to say something to you." "Mr. Paladin!" "Maria, since the first time I set eyes on you I wanted to tell you" "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." "I've longed to take you in my arms and say the gentle, tender things," "That a man should say to a woman." "You stay away from her." "Who's gonna stop me?" "I am!" "Oh?" "Excuse me." "I've got the whole story, maria." "I could marry you, settle down, spend the rest of my life..." "Don't you believe him." "He's just a professional gunfighter." "He's trying to smooth-talk you." "I hired him in san francisco" "To teach me how to tell you how much I love you," "That I want you to be my wife." "Chris!" "Chris!" "You're talking!" "Chris!" "Oh, chris..." "Oh maria, I love you." "Oh chris, I love you too." "Tell him to send my fee to san francisco." "He hired me to teach him how to talk to her." "Now he's started, and if he stops," "You send for me." "¶ have gun, will travel ¶" "¶ reads the card of a man ¶" "¶ a knight without armor ¶" "¶ in a savage land ¶" "¶ his fast gun for hire ¶" "¶ heeds the calling wind ¶" "¶ a soldier of fortune ¶" "¶ is the man called... ¶" "¶ paladin ¶" "¶ paladin, paladin ¶" "¶ where do you roam ¶"