"Goldfish!" "Goldfish!" "Young Master." "Here it is." "Yurakutei Yakumo" "This will be your home from now on." "Yu... rakutei..." "Yes." "I'm impressed that you could read it." "What a bright boy you are." "Now, make sure you do whatever your master says." "I'm sure he'll be good to you." "I know you're nervous, but given how things are right now, you're very fortunate." "I must take my leave now." "But in my absence, I hope that you will remain just as dignified as..." "Wait!" "Hold up!" "Hold it right there!" "Hey, you gettin' apprenticed to the Seventh Generation?" "And if I am?" "Do you have a problem with that?" "Get this!" "Startin' today, I'm your big brother!" "What, don't you know how this works?" "The first apprentice is the big brother!" "Anyway..." "Come on in, brother!" "And so passed the abrasive first meeting between Shin-san—later Sukeroku—and myself." "Hello there, Bon." "Thanks for coming by." "Episode Two" "I owe your mother from a few years back." "You're to be my apprentice and my family, so just think of this place as your own home." "Hey!" "Yes, sir." "Hey, Master!" "How tragic, though." "Unable to continue dancing due to an injury is a cruel fate." "Master!" "But then, women rule in the red-light districts anyway," "Hey!" "Master!" "so maybe it's for the best that you came to me—" "Hey, Master!" "Quit ignoring me!" "Hey!" "Shut the hell up, brat!" "Get lost already!" "No!" "He's a brat, too!" "How come you're takin' him in and not me, huh?" "Jerk!" "Listen up, kiddo." "There's a reason behind everything." "I'm taking in Bon here because he had someone to vouch for him." "I'm not obligated to put myself out for a nobody." "I'm not a nobody." "I was born to do rakugo!" "Seventh Generation!" "Leave the future to me, and it'll be bright!" ""Akegarasu," "Yokachoro," "Funatoku," "Shibahama,"" ""Rakuda," "Bunshichi Motoi," "Nozarashi."" "I can do 'em all!" "Now, c'mon!" "Take me on!" "All advanced works, eh?" "Impudent child." "But, you do sound like you're after more than just a free lunch." "Well, why not perform for me, then?" "Smart move." "The Seventh Generation is discerning." "Hey, mister!" "I'll tell it to you straight." "My wife can't stand me." "Where'd you get the girl from last night?" "Ah, you knew of that?" "I shall tell you the story, then." "It was dark all around me." "I was alone, listening to the melancholy tones of the twilight bell on Mt." "Benten." "Bwong... bwong..." "Cut it out, mister!" "You're scarin' me!" "Don't tell me you saw a ghost!" "Oh, please." "All that I saw were crows." "C-C-Crows?" "!" "They might have had a nest, so I checked the reeds, and I found a skull and corpse, recently dead." "I performed a memorial for it." "Then, that night, there was a fierce knocking upon my door..." "It was those bones thanking you, huh?" "Maybe I'll go fish up some bones, too!" "Hey now!" "Don't just take my pole!" "What's the matter?" "I can fish up a few bones, can't I?" "Take that!" "Like you losers could fish up any good bones!" "When that old bell rings, the incoming tide turns south." "The crow pops out, and la dee da..." "I'll find bones there, ta-daa..." "Hey!" "Su-chara-ka-chan!" "Su-chara-ka-chan!" "Hey now, Ghostie, that tickles!" "Ah, that hurts!" "The hook caught me in the lip!" "That hurts!" "It hurts, ow!" "Hey, look." "That man caught his own lip." "What a great fool." "This is no laughing matter!" "Anyway, it's all the hook's fault, see?" "Who needs a hook anyway?" "Get lost!" "Right." "I get the idea." "Enough." "You learned from watching someone else, right?" "It's nothing." "Total mimicry." "But, you managed to make sourpuss Bon here laugh." "That's no small feat." "Why did you come to me, anyway?" "'Cause I wanna become Yakumo." "I can only get that title from you, right?" "Do you have any idea how much effort it takes to earn this title?" "And I'm the only one who decides who can handle it." "Where are your parents?" "Ain't got none." "The old man who took care of me at the theater liked rakugo, so we did it every day." "But, he died a little while back." "So I came here." "Passed away?" "I see..." "I suppose there's no breaking through your brazen overconfidence, is there?" "Well then, here's 50 coins." "Hit the bath and do something about your filthy state." "Yeah!" "Hey, Matsuda-kun." "Yes?" "We have children's yukata, yes?" "Lay out two of them." "Got it." "Bon, you go along, too." "I realize this is all rather unexpected, but I think it will be interesting." "Go to the bath and talk with him." "Yes, Master." "It's that way!" "Straight down that way!" "Hey, you!" "This isn't funny, dear." "You're going to apprentice that filthy little boy here?" "I thought you said you wouldn't take any more!" "Children are a handful, and now we'll have two of them?" "!" "What was I supposed to do?" "I wasn't even in favor of taking in the first one..." "Now, now." "It's no big deal." "I don't have any other apprentices." "And that Bon is so stiff." "Letting him hang around with that ruffian might be just what he needs." "I'm the one who will have to look after them!" "What?" "What's with the froo-froo attitude?" "We're all guys here." "Nothing to hide." "It's not as if I asked to come here." "Let me do as I like." "Hey, Bon." "You were a dancer, so you can recite dodoitsu poetry, right?" "Do it for me." "No." "C'mon, don't be stingy." "The bath is a place for singing." "Really?" "Y'know?" "It's got good acoustics." "It feels good to step in, but once you're in the water..." "It's a slight imposition, using someone else's bath..." "Shut the hell up, brat!" "Whoops." "The truth comes out." "What, you were lying?" "Where did you learn that?" "That... rakugo." "The theater!" "I'd always come by and the old man started recognizing me, so he'd let me in for free." "Listen." "If you space out too much, you're gonna end up dead." "A kid all on his own needs to use his head." "You were abandoned, too, right?" "I dunno what happened to you, but I know it's rough." "Ending up all alone at a young age..." "Right, Bon?" "Ow!" "H-Hey..." "I knew rationally that there was no helping it, but it was still painful to hear someone else speak those words." "I had been abandoned by my parents." "The truth of the situation hit me all at once." "That in a geisha's house, no one would praise a boy for dancing." "That with my leg ruined, I would only be further shunned." "And that I would now have to do rakugo, in which I had no interest." "For some reason, I told Shin-san, from start to finish, all the painful things I had been unable to tell adults." "I'm sorry." "You probably don't want to hear about any of this." "Bon." "First off, you gotta start smiling'." "If you go up on stage with that sour face of yours, the audience won't laugh, even if you're funny." "Really?" "So, you gotta smile!" "How do I smile when there's nothing funny?" "C'mon!" "I've got a funny face, right?" "No." "And as I told him everything, the first day of my apprenticeship passed." "How about this?" "I don't see it." "Good." "Well-written." "Hatsutaro" "Kikuhiko" "Beginning today, these will be your names." "They indicate your venerable advancement in station." "Please be diligent." "I accept it humbly." "With things how they are, I couldn't give them to you for a while, but now, you can officially open for me." "Master..." "No complaining." "You'll debut at the theater immediately." "Can you perform the stories I taught you?" "Yes!" "Yes..." "You two are opposites in everything." "When one's sunny, the other's a dark cloud." "Just like the weather." "Hatsuta." "Your rakugo is too rushed." "You need to calm down a bit." "And you need to do something about your comportment." "You'll stand out the second you get into the theater." "Yeah, yeah." "Kiku." "Your rakugo is a bit boring." "You need to speak more from your diaphragm." "And be a bit friendlier to your senior apprentices." "I'm getting complaints that you're hard to work with." "Yes, sir..." "Hatsutaro" "Look at this." "It's got "opening act" written all over it." "I hate this name." "What can we do?" "We are his opening act." "Now, Kikuhiko, that's a nice name." "All dignified-sounding, just like you." "Oh?" "What, you don't like it?" "No, I do believe it's a fine name." "It's just, the thought of going on stage so soon..." "What's wrong?" "Not lookin' forward to your first time?" "I envy you." "Not a care in the world." "The date Master chose for our first performance turned out to be very soon." "Oh, I see." "Then if I see a child of about ten, I say, "Your child looks terribly young!"" "Hey, now." "Saying that a child looks young is strange." "With children, you compliment their size." "Well, in that case..." "You are still awake, Master?" "Yes." "Tomorrow is your first performance." "You should go to sleep soon." "The day is here whether I like it or not..." "Matsuda-san, I..." "Rakugo Collection Edo Short Story Collection" "I'm going to sleep." "Matsuda-san, I see you're working late, as well." "That is my job, after all." "Please, leave it open." "I'd like to feel the wind, tonight." "Very well." "Try not to catch a cold." ""I think I'm not cut out for rakugo."" "That was what I almost said to him." "I continued to do it so that I could keep living there, but how long could I keep lying about how I felt?" "At the time, I had not the smallest hope for the future." "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "You flatter me with your courtesy." "Flattery is a curious thing, indeed." "There are many tricks to learn when complimenting someone." "But, if you're not sure how to use them, it can result in some humorous situations." "Listen." "To an old person over 70, it's flattering to say you envy their good fortune." "To someone younger, it's flattering to pin them as younger than they are." "Oh, I see." "Then, if I see a child of about ten, I say, "Your child looks terribly young!"" "Hey, now." "Saying that a child looks young is strange." "With children, you compliment their size." "Oh, so in that case, if it's a boy of about seven," "I should say, "He's so big!" "Will he be joining a youth organization next year?"" "Come on, no seven year old is that big." "And if they're fresh baked?" "You make them sound like bread." "They're called newborns." "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "Oh, that reminds me." "My friend Take has a newborn kid." "How wonderful." "You should go compliment the baby." "Be very formal. "Is this your child?" "What a plump little cabbage!" "What did you say?" "A plump little... what?" "Plump what?" "Plump little cabbage." "Cab... cababbage baggage cabababag..." "What are you babbling on about?" "Say it slowly." "A plump little cabbage." "Oh, I see." "A plump little cabbage." "I understand." "Well, see you later." "Hey!" "Close the door behind you!" "Oh, don't mind me." "That's funny." "I'd better compliment them before I forget." "Take-san, there you are!" "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "Oh, welcome." "Come over here." "I was just pouring myself a drink." "Oh, really?" "I heard your wife just had a baby." "How old are they?" "How old?" "Just born, of course." "Oh, they're one, eh?" "Male or female?" "Hey, don't talk about my child like a dog." "By the way, I don't see them around." "Where are they?" "Out for a walk?" "Hey, cut that out." "Like a newborn child could go out on a walk!" "He's sleeping." "Sleeping?" "At this time of day?" "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "What a lazybones!" "What are you talking about?" "He's behind that screen." "Go see him if you'd like." "Here?" "Oh, there he is!" "My, my." "Look at how red his face is." "He's so lively." "Where's he been drinking?" "He wasn't drinking alcohol." "Did you boil him, then?" "What's wrong with you?" "Babies are "akanbou" because they're red." "Oh, I get it." "If they're red, they're "akanbou."" "If they're blue, they're "aonbou."" "If they're white, they're "shironbou."" "Would you stop talking?" "Take-san, is this your kid?" "What a rude question!" "Obviously, that's my kid." "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "Your child is very cute!" "Just like a skylark." "What a nice thing to say." "You think he's as cute as a songbird, eh?" "Well, when I poke his stomach, he chirps and twitters!" "What's the matter with you?" "Stop doing that." "You're gonna kill him!" "Why don't I compliment your child?" "Oh, compliment him?" "Well, now, this is your honored child, yes?" "Why are you being so formal?" "What's with 'honored child'?" "Your whelp, then." "Hey, don't say that." "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "Your baby's such a lumped baggage..." "I mean, dumped baggage..." "no, was it bumped baggage" "Why do you keep talking about baggage?" "So, how old is he?" "He was just born!" "I keep telling you that!" "Yurakutei Kikuhiko" "Just born?" "!" "But he looks so young!" "How is a newborn supposed to look young?" "No matter how you look at it, he looks half-born." "Were you that amused by my pathetic first performance?" "Hey, now." "I didn't say that." "How late were you out last night?" "You haven't even practiced, have you?" "There's no way you can do proper rakugo like that." "Well, just watch." "Okay?" "Hey!" "You all made it!" "We don't see it much nowadays, but back in old Edo, you saw a lot of soba stalls." "Yurakutei Hatsutaro" "Now, this one soba stall had a particularly obnoxious customer." "And what was so special about him?" "He just complimented the heck out of the shop!" "Is this soba hand-rolled?" "It sure does change the texture!" "It does!" "You're an artist, y'know?" "And this broth is a masterwork!" "Is the base konbu seaweed and bonito?" "I can tell." "Oh, I can!" "A lot of effort went into this broth!" "And this bowl is great!" "You chose this one out of thousands!" "Good eye!" "And the fish cake!" "Incredible!" "It's handmade, right?" "I can tell!" "The love comes out in the flavor!" "What?" "!" "Yurakutei Hatsutaro" "You say you bought the fish cake from your neighbor?" "Oh, I just knew it!" "Your neighbor's love comes out in the flavor!" "I'm all done, sir." "How much for a bowl?" "16 mon?" "Small change, eh?" "Let's count it together." "Okay?" "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight!" "Six, seven, eight!" "Hey mister, what time is it?" "Yurakutei Hatsutaro" "It's nine." "Ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen." "Sixteen mon, fair and square!" "So long!" "He played the guy so well, he saved himself a mon!" "Now, watching at the same time was a man with his head in the clouds." "He prepared his change, and..." "Hey, mister!" "Is this soba handmade?" "It's so soft!" "So easy to eat!" "Yurakutei Hatsutaro" "Wait, is this really soba?" "It's so thick, I thought it was udon." "Oh, well." "The real masterwork is this broth." "It's bonito and konbu seaweed, right?" "What?" "You didn't use either?" "It's just water with a little soy sauce?" "I thought it was pretty salty..." "But hey, this bowl is..." "Cracked..." "What's with this place?" "Yurakutei Hatsutaro" "Well, whatever!" "Mister, how much is one bowl of soba?" "16 mon?" "!" "Small change!" "Hold out your hand." "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight..." "Hey, mister, what time is it?" "Oh, it's four." "Five, six, seven, eight..." "Hey, mister, what time is it?" "Oh, it's four." "Five, six, seven, eight..." "Hey, mister, what time is it?" "Oh, it's four." "Five, six, seven, eight..." "Mister!" "Yurakutei Hatsutaro" "Show mercy already!" "You finally smiled." "Didn't I tell you?" "First, you gotta smile." "Storyteller" "Next time, Showa Genroku Rakugo Shinju Episode 3." "We appreciate your continued support."