"[a phone is ringing]" "Where are those projections?" "3, 6, and 9 are in your folders." " Can I have some more..." " Tea's at your seat." " Excellent." " [on the phone] Hello?" "Oh, hold on." "Ben Federman again." "Another pre-call." "[Carly presses the speaker phone.]" "We did the pre-call." "This is the post-pre-call-call?" "[Ben] The Board's gonna want some specifics for the push into the Asian market." "Ben, there are no specifics about Asia." "We came up with that as a Hail Mary at three in the morning to placate the board about International!" "[Ben] Carly, I'm just giving you a heads-up about Asia." "There is no Asia." "Let's talk about Asia." "We're in the preliminary stages of forming a strategic alliance with Credit Lyonnais." "Within three months you won't be able to walk four feet in Kyung Hong, South Korea, without seeing one of our beautiful models smiling at you from billboards and drugstore windows inviting you in." "That's incredible news, Carly." "We'd hoped to hear something about Asia, but had no idea plans were so far along." "Well, you know Asia." "Nothing's done until it's done." "[The board laughs]" "Carly, I was wondering, could you walk us through what you were thinking for other Asian territories?" "Absolutely." "India has over half a billion women." "In terms of spending power it's the single largest potential market in the world." "Um, we have retained a local firm to ensure that cultural differences are respected, um, however, I can't go into the specifics of my plan with you until tomorrow;" "right now I have a meeting and I need the room." "We were just getting started." "I know, and I do apologize." "It's last minute, but the meeting is with three State Department officials to smooth the way for China." "China?" "This is just incredible." "We'll be in touch." "Thank you." "What is it?" "I need a doctor." "I can't move my leg!" "1X14:" "CONTROL" "Original Airdate on FOX:" "March 15, 2005" "32-year-old female, paralysis and severe pain in her right quad." "Go." "How'd she get to you?" "She's the CEO of Sonyo Cosmetics." "Three assistants and fifteen VPs checked out who should be treating her." "Who da man?" "I da man." "I always suspected." "Dr. House, I know the chances are very slim, but" "I'm sure you recognize that she may have what you had:" "a clot in her thigh." "[coughs] A bit of a long shot." "What about a disc herniation?" "I don't know, Eric." "If her disc were herniated, she'd present with pain elsewhere, wouldn't she?" "Yeah, I suppose." "You're right, a clot's also the most deadly, right, Robert?" "True." "The clot breaks off, she could stroke and die." "Dr. House, I believe that they're right, and..." "Stop talking." "What?" "You read one of those negotiating books, didn't you?" ""Getting to Yes:" "Fifty Ways to Win an Argument."" ""The Hitchhiker's Guide to Being a Pal."" "In five seconds you just manipulated these two into agreeing with your point of view." "Fellas, this is known as "soft positional bargaining."" "It's not gonna work." "Dr. House, are you saying that she doesn't have a clot or are you saying that if she does have a clot she doesn't need blood thinners and an angiogram?" "Chase, put her on blood thinners, do an angiogram." "When that comes back negative, MRI the spine." "If that's clean, cut her open and biopsy the leg." "Excellent suggestion." "Read less, more TV." "It's rare for an individual to make a donation significant enough to impact an organization as large and unwieldy as a hospital." "This donation does come with one string:" "that he be made Chairman of the Board." "I think that's a reasonable request." "I think he should have the right to know what it is we do with his $100 million." "Please welcome our new Chairman of the Board, Edward Vogler." "Thank you, thank you." "When I was eighteen, my dad loaned me $20, 000 for a college tuition which he would have known was a mistake had he known that I wasn't actually in college." "[board chuckles]" "I took his money and invested in a friend who had a little business, and when my dad found out what I had done with his money, he and I didn't talk much after that." "But my friend's business took off, and I used the profits from that to buy another company, and another, and I must have been pretty good at it, had a good eye, because before I knew it people were making offers for my company." "And, uh, about a year ago I went public and overnight I was worth a billion dollars." "So I went to see my dad." "[Board chuckles]" "I'll admit, I wanted a little payback, you know, kind of shove the wind in his face, so I went upstate and sat in the kitchen I grew up in and, uh, he had no reaction." "It wasn't his fault, he didn't even know who I was." "Because his Alzheimer's had taken a turn for the worse, despite the best drugs and care out there, and that is why I'm here." "What if my contribution to this hospital is the difference between no cure and a cure for cancer?" "The difference between a man not recognizing his wife of 35 years and being able to look at her and say," ""Good morning, honey." "I love you."" "If there's a disease out there killing people, I am writing you a blank check to fight back." "So, things are going to change, a lot." "[Board clapping]" "I'm gonna have to ask you for the cell phone?" "Do what you need to do, I'm okay." "Pretty sure my x-ray machine can take your phone in a fight." "It'll fry it." "Fine." "How old is she?" "32." "Wow." "She's already the CEO of a public company." "She's a workaholic." "Okay Carly, hold still." "The x-ray machine is gonna pass over your leg." "Okay." "What'd you do with your time off?" "Snowboarding in Stadt." "Switzerland!" "Do you ski or board?" "You can come with, if you like." "Maybe we should start with a drink before we go 'round the world." "Oh, you want to have a drink with me?" "Oooh, very aggressive!" "I like that." "I want to run this place like a business." "What, you want to put more vending machines in the hallway?" "Maybe a roulette wheel?" "Nice one." "But I'm serious." "The product that you're selling is good health, it shouldn't be a tough sell." "You don't want to sell, it means people don't care about your product." "You care if people are healthy, or are you too proud for that?" "Who's that?" "That's, uh, just one of our doctors." "Aren't doctors supposed to wear lab coats." "He's... different." "Everyone's buddy." "No, not exactly." "Then why does he get away with it?" "It's just a coat." "He's very good." "Hmm." "Say "ah"." "Ah." "No, really belt it out, like you're gonna throw up." "Ah!" "[Coughs]" "Perfect." "Okay, that's it." "We should know in a couple of days what's growing in your son's throat." "Hello?" "He can't talk." "Excuse me?" "He had knee surgery." "Right..." "About a year ago, and then he couldn't talk." "Right, yeah, well, that happens." "You know, it's... it's very dangerous operating so close to the vocal chords." "Okay, well, we'll send your kid's culture to the lab and somebody will call you." " BOO!" " AAH!" "Just wanted to see if your dad, uh, sorry." "I need you to wear your lab coat." "I need two days of outrageous sex with someone obscenely younger than you." "Like half your age." "Wear the coat." "Man oh man." "Someone got spanked real good this morning." "Guy gives $100 million to cure cancer, pretty small concession to wear a lab coat." "Cure cancer." "Is the hospital getting out of the dull business of treating patients?" "You know that's not what he's doing." "I know exactly what he's doing." "He's using us to run clinical trials." "Oh, shame on him!" "Saving lives like that!" "It's unethical." "Oh, are you coming in, too?" "I thought I had you convinced." "Clinical trials save thousands of lives." "He's using patients as guinea pigs." "Pharmaceutical companies do that every day." "Are we a pharmaceutical company?" "We're gonna wind up pressuring desperate patients into choices that are bad for them, good for us." "You're gonna compromise patient care." "Who the hell am I talking to?" "Suddenly ethical lapses are a major concern for you?" "What's interesting is it suddenly doesn't bother you." "So, if you ignore ethics to save one person it's admirable, but if you do it to save a thousand you're a bastard." "All he's done is taken your game and gone pro." "He's not going to kill a few patients." "He's going to kill this hospital." "It took him three seconds to size you up, and surprise?" "He doesn't like you." "Wear the damn coat." "Hello." "I'm Dr. Foreman, I work with Dr. House." "Our initial tests say you're fine." "We think you may have had a clot but it resolved on its own, so we're gonna keep you overnight to be safe and you can go back home tomorrow." "Or, back to work." "Hey, you okay." "[Whimpers in pain]" "[SCREAMS]" "Get in here!" "I need a line in her, IV morphine, stat!" "[SCREAMS]" "Get any read on the new Chairman of the Board?" "Yeah, he took your parking space." "It's not necessarily bad news." "Do you ever watch "Gilligan's Island" reruns and really, really think they're gonna get off the island this time?" "We should introduce ourselves." "It couldn't hurt." "Make him a bundt cake." "Patient hit a ten on the pain scale." "What would explain that?" "There was no clot in her leg, the angio was totally clean." "What about the muscle biopsy?" "No neurogenic or myopathic abnormalities." "She's also negative for trichinosis, no toxoplasmosis or polyarteritis nodosa." "Robert, what was her sedimentation rate?" "Normal, Allison, therefore no inflammation, no immunologic response." "Do you mind sharing that number with me?" "Fifteen, Allison." "Are you mocking me?" "Duh, Allison." "I'm just suggesting we look outside the box." "What if her sed rate is elevated?" "Well, let's go further outside the box." "Let's say the angio revealed a clot, and let's say we treated that clot, and now she's all better, and personally thanked me by performing..." "My Aunt Elisa lives in Philiadelphia." "Oh, it's storytime!" "Let me get my baba." "Her normal temperature is 96.2, not 98.6 like you and me." "If her temperature were 98.6, she'd have a fever." "I'm just wondering if you think we could apply the same logic to Carly's sed rate." "That's absurd." "I love it." "If 15 is high for Carly, then she has inflammation." "Which could, in turn, mean cancer." "I'll talk to Wilson." "Next time, skip Aunt Elisa." "You're probably talking about a primary bone cancer." "Can be tricky to detect, you'll need a bone scan..." "That's why I'm talking to an oncologist." "Sure, I've nothing better to do besides departmental meetings and budget reports... new Chairman of the Board, you know." "Oh!" "I hadn't heard." "Right." "Clinical trials..." "Completely unethical." "And a very bad omen for you." "There's not much money in curing African sleeping sickness." "No, I have seen every scary movie ever made." "Six-year-old twins in front of an elevator of blood, boys' choirs: those are bad omens." "This is much more mundane:" "a billionaire wants to get laid." "Billionaires buy movie studios to get laid." "They buy hospitals to get respect." "And the reason you want respect?" "To... get laid." "Okay then." "You've just gotta think like a billionaire." "Let's see, big scary changes, and then," ""Oh, Dr. Cameron, we should have dinner to discuss your future on my G-5 private jet."" "Oh, come on." "You know how good you have it here." "Yes, I'm the big poobah, the big cheese, the go-to guy." "You do the cases you want to do, when you want to do them." "You're not going to get that anywhere else." "Relax, I've been through three regime changes in this hospital." "Every time, same story." "Just keep your head down, that's all I'm saying." "And put on your coat." "It itches." "So, are you going to do this bone scan for me or what?" "Yes." "Dr. Simpson!" "Did you hear?" "New management." "I'm thinking about switching to orthopedics." "How much do you guys get for massage now, without the happy ending?" "Dr. House, what do you want?" "You remember a guy named Van Der Meer?" "Not a big talker." "You fixed his ACL." "Well, not according to my medical malpractice premiums." "Didn't get hypertensive during surgery?" "No strokes?" "Maybe some connectivity loss?" "What, you're going to get involved now?" "I'm not involved." "Guy brought his son into the clinic." "I didn't touch the son." "I'm not taking any responsibility there." "The son's fine." "Can't shut him up." "The dad show any signs of cortical disease?" "Wernicke's?" "No." "Nothing." "And that's why we settled;" "because we couldn't find anything." "The guy got over a million dollars, don't tell me he's complaining." "He's not saying "boo"." "Your father wants to know when you'll be back from your trip." "Email back." ""It's taking longer than I thought."" "He doesn't need to see me like this." "What about your brother?" "No." "Hello." "I'm Dr. Wilson." "I was..." "Robin, I'm going to need a minute." "Oh." "Thank you." "There are two Dr. Wilsons in the hospital." "One in ophthalmology and one in cancer." "My eyes are fine, so I'm guessing you're here to tell me I have cancer." "There's no cancer in your bone." "You're not smiling." "There's something called referred pain." "You could have cancer in one part of your body that presents in another." "Given your age and your family history, I'm thinking your colon." "Great." "I was at Columbia when my mom died." "Now there's a blast." "Cleaning up her vomit and running to my econ final." "Look, if I'm a short-timer give me drugs, I'll go back to work, I'll die there." "Whoa." "There's a quick test to see if you even have it, a colonoscopy." "I know how you do that test." "If you have colon cancer, we can treat it, it's early." "That's what they told my mom." "She was dead six months later." "You're a smart person about to make a very bad decision." "You know, cancer treatment's come a long way in twelve years, but if you don't do this now..." "I don't want to be looked at!" "There is another way." "We could do a virtual colonoscopy." "Basically, we do a CT scan of your colon." "It's non-evasive, but it's very expensive." "I assume that's not a problem." "Say yes." "Mr. Van Der Meer." "What?" "["whats werong gwith ricky"]" "Relax, Ricky's going to be just "finkf"." "Strep throat, here's a prescription for an antibiotic." "He should be all better in a few days." "Although, this might sting a little." "I want to see you again real soon." "Virtual colonoscopy was clean." "No colon cancer." "What happened to a regular old-fashioned colonoscopy?" "She was uncomfortable doing any more tests!" "I had to convince her to do that one!" "Do you get that often?" "Women would rather die than get naked with you?" "She's scared." "But not of tests." "Just embarrassing ones." "Yeah." "It's not an inflammatory process, it's not a clot because Chase's angio says so, and it's not cancer because her toosh is perfect." "Anybody else got an Aunt Elisa with weird stuff?" "Maybe it's worth looking into..." "I thought you said Carly's angio was clean." "It was clean." "You guys see the problem here?" "There's no indication of any abnormalities." "No lesions, no spurs, no masses..." "Her toes are screwed up." "They're backwards." "Do you guys know how much surgery it's going to take to swap them back?" "What are you talking about?" "Either she literally has two left feet or you angio-ed the wrong leg." "That's impossible." "It can't be the wrong..." "Or maybe it was Jenny!" "How come some resident signed this radiology report?" "Were you even in the room?" " I'll redo her angio straight away..." " You'll do nothing!" "Foreman, you do the angiogram." "I can't believe I did that." "Why do we have to redo the angiogram?" "There was a shadow on the first test result." "A shadow?" "A shadow means there could be a blood clot, right?" "I read Colin's current therapy." "Real page turner." "No, it's not that kind of shadow." "My chest hurts." "It's from the tracer I injected." "Might also get a little nauseous, or have a metallic taste, all normal." "I'm a runner." "I shouldn't feel like this." "Carly, I'm looking at your vitals right now, and..." "I can't breathe." "Carly?" "My chest..." "My chest." "Respiratory arrest, call the code." "What've you got?" "She's drowning." "[Cameron] Foreman did a thoracentesis to drain the fluid from her lungs." "She's stable." "They sent the fluid to the lab, it'll be back in a few hours." "You'll be happy to know that Chase's mistake didn't cost her." "Angio revealed no clot." "I'm thrilled." "Okay, see, now you're just being stubborn." "It's cold, perfectly good excuse to wear your lab coat." "Carly needs a heart transplant." "Thoracentesis revealed a transudate?" "Haven't gotten it back yet." "Her MUGA scan, what was the ejection fracture?" "Maybe you could treat it, surgically." "Haven't done the MUGA." "How do you know she needs a heart transplant?" "I got my aura read today." "It said someone close to me had a broken heart." "Since when do I need the secret pass code to talk to you?" "I can't tell you anything." "Professional responsibility." "Like that matters to you." "Not my professional responsibility, yours." "New regime, you gotta keep your head down, too." "Now, that's good thinking, because I was going to go right to Cuddy and rat you out as soon as you were done talking." "I'm not saying you want to, I'm saying you'd be obligated to." "Because of my position on the Board?" "Because of my position on the transplant committee?" "Hey, you brought this up for a reason." "You need to talk to me." "I can't." "You sure you're doing the right thing?" "I've come up with a few really great rationalizations." "Sorry to interrupt." "We have a problem." "Thoracentesis revealed a transudate." "We did an echo." "She's in severe congestive heart failure." "She needs a heart transplant." "We'll get her on the list immediately..." "She's already on the list." "[Knocks on the door]" "Come in." "Thanks." "What is a "Department of Diagnostic Medicine"?" "That's Dr. House's department." "They deal with cases that other doctors can't figure out." "It's a financial black hole." "Department costs us $3 million a year, treat one patient a week." "He saves one patient per week." "What about everyone else?" "His department's not going to find the cure for breast cancer." "Uh, maybe not, but..." "Are you sleeping with House?" "What?" "No." "But you did, right?" "A long time ago?" "That's an incredibly inappropriate question." "If your judgment is compromised by prior or current relationship, that is my business." "I respect him, that is all you need to know." "He's still not wearing a coat." "Well, I told him..." "I'm sure you did." "And yet, he's not wearing it." "I'm just wondering if that's a reflection on him, or on you." "You're Dr. House." "I found a picture of you online at a conference..." "You need a heart transplant." "I run, I work out, I..." "You cut yourself." "Probably highly ritualized." "You play the same Sarah MacLaughlin song over and over while you do it, probably works better than anti-depressants." "I don't understand how that has to..." "You're a high-powered bulimic." "You make yourself throw up." "You have to find the most efficient way to vomit without revealing the tell-tale signs of bulimia, which is all, eugh." "Very unseemly, for a CEO." "So, you found a common antidote for accidental poisoning to do the job: ipecac." "Which is great, if your kid's just swallowed a bottle of aspirin, but really, really bad if it's a habit." "It causes muscle damage." "It caused the pain in your leg." "And it destroyed your heart." "How often do you do it?" "Three times a week." "In about an hour, there's going to be an emergency meeting of the transplant committee to discuss where you fall on the list should a new heart become available." "Problem is, I am required to tell the committee of your bulimia, it's a major psychiatric condition." "Ranks right up there with suicidal, makes you a very bad risk." "So you're here to tell me I have just a few hours to live?" "Unless I lie to the committee." "But if they find out, I lose my medical license." "This would be a very good time to offer me a bribe." "How much is your life worth, how much is my job worth..." "Why are you here doing this to me?" "What do you want?" "I want to know what's right." "Am I worth it?" "You think I'm pathetic." "Has a good job, everything in the world, but she just doesn't like the way that she looks..." "[Yelling] Oh, stop hiding!" "I'm asking you if you want to live or die, you can't even say that!" "What do you want me to do?" "Cry?" "Yes!" "I want you to tell me that your life is important to you, because I don't know!" "Because that's what's on the table right now:" "your life." "[crying] I don't want to die." "I don't." "This 32-year-old female was admitted by my staff because of paralysis and pain in her right thigh." "Patient rapidly deteriorated and now has severe congestive heart failure." "Pressers and vasodilators have not improved her conditions whatsoever." "Pulmonary function tests show an FVC of over 3 liters with EDD-1 of at least 90% of predicted." "And preserved FEB/FEC ratio and preserved DLCO as well." "Her MUGA had an ejection fraction of 19% with no focal wall or motion abnormalities." "Heart catheterization revealed clean left, right and circumflex arteries, and subsequent biopsy revealed irreversible cardial myopathy." "Which is why we're here." "Uh, Dr. House, I'm confused by your time and date stamps." "It appears that you put Carly on the transplant list before you did these tests." "I had a hunch." "You don't have hunches." "You know." "Look, if the tests had come back differently, obviously I would have taken her off the lists, but on the long shot..." "On the long shot I was right, I didn't want to waste time." "Is there any exclusion criteria we should know about?" "CAT scan revealed no tumors and Dr. Wilson found no trace of cancer." "What about any other criteria?" "No atherosclerotic vascular disease..." "Are there any..." "No pneumonia, no bacteriemia, no Hep-B or C or any other letters." "Substance abuse?" "Any history of..." "No alcohol, no drugs." "Any psychiatric conditions, history of depression..." "She's a little blue, but turns out she needs a heart transplant." "Dr. House, if you subvert or mislead this committee, you will be subject to disciplinary action." "Dr. Cuddy, do you have any reason to think that I would lie?" "I simply want you to answer the question!" "Is there anything on the recipient exclusion criteria that would disqualify your patient from getting a heart?" "No." "Beautiful organ donor weather." "You lied, didn't you?" "I never lie." "Big mistake." "Then you should have voted against putting her on the list." "You're my friend." "Oh, jeez." "Have some backbone." "If you think I'm wrong, do something." "Wait, you're getting mad at me for sticking up for you?" "You value our friendship more than your ethical responsibilities." "Our friendship is an ethical responsibility." "[Beeper beeps]" "What is it?" "My patient's getting a heart." "He's not gonna fire you." "I'd fire you." "Bye bye." "If I screw up, the patient dies, I'll never get another job." "So go stick your head between your legs and lick your wounds in Stadt." "Well, I like it here." "You guys don't think it's weird House knew the patient needed a heart transplant before we did any heart tests?" "That's House." "He knows things." "But usually, he's putting it in our face, telling us how cleverly he figured it out." "This time, nothing." "Just "I had a hunch"." "It is weird." "[IPECAC SYRUP]" "Okay, ready for the donor heart." "[The monitors flatlining]" "They just stopped Carly's heart." "And your dumb patient..." "They're all ?" "oh, the guy who can't talk." "Mr. Van Der Meer, he scheduled an appointment to see you." "Oooh, goody." "I wanted you to know Chase is worried you're going to fire him." "It's bad enough that screw-ups cost lives." "Now we've got Vogler, screw-ups cost jobs." "I want Chase scared." "I want him doing everything he can to protect his job." "Dr. House, if you were in his position wouldn't you be more likely to perform well if you were reassured and..." "Oh, will you stop it with the book!" "Why are you doing this?" "I'm not doing anything." "You're manipulating everyone." "People... dismiss me." "Because I'm a woman, because I'm pretty, because I'm not aggressive." "My opinions shouldn't be rejected just because people don't like me." "They like you." "Everyone likes you." "Do you?" "I have to know." "No." "[quietly] Okay." "5 hours, 23 minutes, that's fast." "Is that good or bad?" "It depends." "Either surgery went really well, or it ended really abruptly." "Textbook." "She'll outlive us all." "Thank you." "So, sing for me." "Oh, no, no, no, no... come on, look." "When you had your surgery, you were intubated." "Surgeon stuck a tube down your throat." "Now, it never happens, and it's never caught, but it happens." "Your vocal chords were paralyzed." "I treated the spastic dysphonia with Botox." "Ironically, a substance that tightens every other corner of your face actually loosens the tongue." "I have healed you." "You can talk." "Oh, well." "OOOO!" "Okay, you don't have to say anything, it can be our little secret." "If you can talk, blink twice." "But you're not going to, because you think you won't be entitled to the money you won in the settlement with Simpson." "Yesterday I would have said you'd have to give the money back." "Today... hospital's come into a lot of money, mum's the word." "Hey." "Hey." "I know the cardiologist has given you some guidelines, schedule of medications, and a strict diet:" "just what someone with an eating disorder needs." "So, I thought I'd get you started." "Fried chicken from the Carnegie Deli." "You're kidding." "Yeah." "Actually, I got it downstairs." "[Laughs a bit]" "Why did you fight for me?" "You risked so much, and you hardly know me." "You're my patient." "Don't screw it up." "[The Who's "Baba O'Riley"is playing, and House is playing air synthesizer on his desk]" "Love this part!" "[switches to air drums]" "[Vogler turns off his music]" "Okay." "He ruined it." "Just wanted to stop by and introduce myself." "I'm Edward Vogler, new Chairman of the Board." "In a way, I guess that makes me your boss." "I am sorry about the lab coat thing." "The dry cleaners destroyed it." "[Laughs]" "That was my very first heart transplant committee meeting, very exciting." "Trust me." "Six Flags, way more exciting." "Patient's very lucky to have such a passionate doctor who stands up for what he believes in." "Sweet of you to say." "Yeah. 'Fraid you've been duped, though." "The nurse found this in the patient's purse." "Oh, my." "If only I'd known." "Tough being a doctor." "You've got all that power." "The power to play God." "Yes, I don't envy the transplant committee their responsibility." "They basically would have been forced to kill that poor girl." "I'm not sure I could have done that." "This is not a game to me, Dr. House." "No." "This is actually more like we're dancing right now." "So let's get to the point." "You don't like me." "I'm pretty sure I'm not going to like you." "It's nothing personal, I don't like anybody." "But none of that really matters, does it, because you've got money, and I've got tenure." "You need full board approval to get rid of me." "I've got Cuddy." "Right." "And Wilson." "So, as long as we're stuck with each other, we might as well ignore each other." "[He turns on the iPod and quickly turned off.]" "That wasn't nearly as dramatic as I was hoping." "I looked into that tenure thing, and you're right." "It's actually easier for me to get rid of a board member like Cuddy or Wilson than to get rid of a doctor." "That's interesting, isn't it?" "Out here in the fields" "I fight for my meals" "I get my back into my living" "I don't need to fight" "To prove I'm right" "I don't need to be forgiven"