"Our strength lies not in words but in deeds." "In the Jewish genius." "In conclusion, just a few words, for time is short and the task is great." "The Jewish genius has again achieved the unprecedented, a feat never before accomplished by our people, returning to its homeland after 2000 years in order to construct great enterprises unequaled in any other place" "I am happy and proud to officially open this wonderful flower fair..." "Road." " What?" " Road." " Road" "This road." "This large road" "A two-lane road open to all vehicles and cavaliers." "Friends, I stand and my eyes ache from the beauty." "Is this a vision I see?" "Or a mirage?" "Well done, friends." "You and all here present, friends, our strength lies not in words but in deeds." "In the Jewish genius..." "Let us..." "There is still time." "We' re in the middle now." " Cut." " What?" " Cut." "Cut." "Congratulations." " Congratulations." "Please, may I?" "Bravo!" "Shaike Offir" "In an Efraim Kishon film" ""The Fox in the Chicken Coop"" "Shoshana Shani Zaharira Harifai" "Do you think I was long?" " The public wasn't orderly." "But in general?" " "Israel's Cavaliers", classic!" "I draw from the sources." "What now?" " Parliament." " You should listen today." "I mean to be very assertive today." "Clear cut." "MP..." " Very well." "But not on the worker's back." "Dolniker, Please!" " Okay, okay, I' m finished." "Get in, Zeev." "Did you notice the silence when I began to speak?" "They paled." " Fabulous, sir, you were great." "Gentlemen, I had to put him in his place." "Not on the worker's back!" "What now?" " Women." "And so, friends, when my wife says to me:" "Dolik, the girls want to know about emancipation," "I said:" "How can I say no to such sweet girls?" "Thirty years ago our ways parted." "I said: " Geula, you go your way in women's organizations and I' II go my public way." "And this was the beginning of women liberation." "Not in the American style, hanging brassieres on poles." "But most important..." " Thank you, Dolik." "Friends, coffee and pie in the foyer." "We' II meet next Thursday, good bye." "You had to stop me just before I made my point." "You spoke for over an hour." " It was extremely impolite." " Clean your mouth." "Hogwash I' II give them, not emancipation." "Not this side, the other side." "Silly pointless game." "Childish." "This is my last term in the sports administration," "I promise you." " Drop the promises." " Go!" "The factory has been on strike for several days." "The management is doing everything possible." "Gentlemen, let me briefly speak to them, and everything will be well again within minutes." "Thank you, Mr. Dolniker." " Camarade Dolniker." " Yes." "The situation is very tense right now." "They want an 8.5% raise." "It is not a question of percent, but of values." "I' II give them my "Israeli worker" speech." "No, Dolniker, we' re in a hurry today." "We have a ceramics exposition." "Stamps?" " Ceramics." " What ceramics?" "...Leave me alone now!" "Friends, workers," "Dear committee members." "Let me say to you, as a friend, of course, not 30 nor 60 pounds will make a change in the economy." " It will make a change, sir, in my home." " What will my kids eat?" "Friends, please, I beg of you." "Friends!" "We all bear the burden of developing the country." "What are you bearing?" "Friends, I represent you and not the management!" "Who asked you here anyway!" "Friends, I am flesh of your flesh!" "I have fought the worker's fight day and night!" "Written and directed by:" "Efraim Kishon" "What time is it?" " Sorry?" " Six thirty." "Radio, radio." " What does he want?" "The military channel." " Turn the radio on, friend." ""I am member of the spices committee and I tell you" ""there is enough pepper in..." " But no cumin, Mr. Dolniker." ""So there's no cumin." "This is much like the butcher" ""who was not allowed to blow the shofar on holidays." ""But rabbi, I heard you did not wash up."" "In Yiddish it sounds better." "Mr. Dolnikder must refrain for at least 3 months from any public activity." " Is he general secretary?" "Politician." " What?" "Same thing, medically." "What?" " Are you deaf or something?" "Mr. Dolniker must go away on holiday." "But Dr. Aronovitch," " It's okay, Dolniker, we' II go to Italy, to "Laguo Maggiore"." "We shall not leave the country." "Only on mission." "That can be arranged." "We' II call the center." "What are you talking about?" "Do you seriously think that Dolik can survive without meetings, assemblies, speeches?" "I will go incognito to some far-off village where nobody knows who I am." "If such a backward place even exists." "Are we there yet?" " Not yet, sir." "What is the name of this village?" " "Mount Cumin"." "They grow cumin." " Wonderful." "But I don't see any "Mount Cumin" here." "There it is." " Dolniker, that's Syria." "This is not a village, this is nothing." "Actually, a very backward place." "What time do the morning papers arrive, my friend?" "They don't." " They don't?" "Then how does the local intelligentsia follow world events, if I may ask?" "It doesn't." " It doesn't?" "Wonderful." "This will be a brilliant refreshing holiday indeed." "Without noise nor press." "What ails you, Zeev?" " I don't feel well." "Breathe deep." "Inhale and exhale alternately." "What does this resemble?" "The butcher who was not allowed to blow the shofar." "You know this, do you?" " Sure." " Yes." "The rabbi said: " I heard you did not wash yourself"." "The butcher says:" ""The water was cold"." "The rabbi said, this is funny," "The rabbi said:" ""Auf Kalatw blaz man nicht"." "You do not cool down what is already cool." "In Yiddish it's more..." "What are the transport possibilities from here?" "Sir, I am the transport possibilities." "When will you be coming back to the village?" "Usually I bring merchandise every two months." "Unless they send a dove before." "What?" " A dove." " And on foot?" "A week's walk to the nearest bus station." "It's exhilarating to be one with nature." "Even for a city man like yourself, Zeev." "Well, gang, let's go!" "Mountain air!" "We shall enjoy this lovely province for several days." "Very stimulating." "Excuse me, friends, perhaps..." "Good day, sir." "Excuse me, friend, could you recommend a hotel, we came for vacation." "They didn't recognize me, see?" "Watch out, Dolniker!" "Friend." " Excuse me, the luggage, could you..." "Working men." "Mostly, working men." "This building looks like a hostel." "Go in, friends, and book us two chambers." "Separate, of course." "South-east for me, if possible." "Yes, Dolniker." " Don't forget the incognito." "Of course!" " Not a hint." " Sure!" "Don't mention my name." " Trust me." "Hello, I' m Amitz Dolniker's secretary." "Sorry?" " Amitz Dolniker is here." " Malka..." "Come here a minute, Malka, I can't understand a thing." "What is it, Elifaz." "Hello, Madame." "I am Mr. Dolniker's secretary." "Mr. Dolniker would like a room." "Who is it?" " The parliament member Dolniker." "He's a central public figure, assistant manager." "Is he Turkish?" " No, Dolniker." "Too bad, then, we don't know him." "We only know one manager from PICA." "But he is a big figure." "No one bigger in the whole of Palestine." "He's an engineer." " An engineer?" "Engineer." " I see." "Well, Zeev, they recognized me, did they?" "Did they?" "Not yet." " Not yet." "Perfect." "That means the incognito is working." "I hope the room is south-east at least." ""It's so good to live in our village." ""We' re so very happy here." ""I drink wine all day, let's raise a toast." ""Every day is a holiday..." ""There's no place like Mount Cumin" ""There's no better place in the whole world" ""The rainbow's in the sky and I' m building my sty." ""I couldn't care less about the world outside..."" "Zeev." " What?" "What is she doing here?" " Who?" " Geula." "My wife." "Don't you see?" "Are you kidding?" "That's Elifaz's wife..." ""I couldn't care less about the world oustide."" "Dr. Hermenovitch?" "How did you get here?" "What's the matter with you?" "That's the bartender." "Are you alright?" "Nothing, just for a moment..." " Don't worry, it' II pass." ""..." "Life here is like a dream" ""There is no happier or healthier man than me" ""In the flowering cumin fields..." ""..." "Life here is like a dream" ""..." "Here life is happy and peaceful..."" "Good evening, Mr. Engineer." "All settled in your room?" " Charmed, ladies." "I' m sorry it's on the second floor." "We only have two rooms and..." "The other one is for the two of us." "We did not come for luxury but for a rustic holiday." "Never mind." "Feel at home." "And if you need anything, just knock on my door." "Charmed, ladies." "Okay." "Who's that?" " The village butcher." "What's he doing?" " Verifying the food is kosher." "Kosher?" "That's not legitimate." "You must admit it's surprising at first." "A spoon stuck in your soup like that..." "But kosher is legitimate..." "May I know where you know this maiden from?" "I live at her father's house." "Zemah Gurevitch." "The cobbler." "She's got a great body." "I do not like such vulgar humor at the dinner table." "She's deaf and dumb." " All the more reason." "Mr. Gurevitch, I believe." "First, greetings from the parliament, gentlemen." "I wanted to ask, friends, do all the courses here contain so much cumin as in the cumin soup I just ate?" "It's not me." "I didn't mean personally, of course." "Zeev, no pretending, you told them, didn't you?" "Me, how do you know?" " How do I know?" "I can see!" "They' re so excited by my presence they don't even dare look at my face." "These poor people are not used to official visits." "Nice village folk." "We shall give them a small speech." "No, no, not now." "Not now." " Why not?" "They certainly deserve it." "People of Mount Cumin," "Ladies, gentlemen, elderly members, newcomers, friends." "I would like to thank you dearly, for the informal hospitality, if I may say, friends..." "Let go!" "Let me go, Zeev, I am speaking!" "I am touched by the respect you hold for me." "Moreover, I am not inclined to unnecessary ceremony." "However..." " Quiet, we' re eating!" "The soup will get cold!" "Here we eat and only eat." "For god's sake, what is this?" "This is dinner." "Zeev, I' m in no mood for your childish games." "Neither am I. What else is there to do in this hole?" "You call this a village?" "A stinking dump." "They have no running water." "Nor electricity." "Did I want to come here?" " Who then?" "Me, maybe?" "Zeev, I will no longer take your advice on holidays." "With all the respect I hold for working men, these village folk not only are behind civilization by a few hundred years, but they are incredibly stupid as well!" "Ignoramus and vile, who haven't even heard of Amitz Dolniker." "And don't tell me..." "Zeev!" "Sorry, it was about my room." "Zeev, I see country life has a very negative effet on you." "Control yourself, or you' II lose your humanity." "Cumin, Dolniker, it spices things up." "Really, I've been with women." "Surrounded by them." "But always based on emotion and mutual respect." "And not on wild animal eroticism." "Okay, Dolniker, I didn't know it was a sacred cow." "Salutations, young man." "Hello, Mr. Engineer!" "I am not an engineer and I have no need for titles as long as my name is Amitz Dolniker." "Micha." "Have a nice day, Mr. Engineer." "Friend, I would like to see the head of the committee." "The cows just ate." " Where is the committee?" "Wherever I go, the cows follow me." "All of them." "Mr. Dolniker would like to meet your leaders." "Those who arrange things." "Well?" "There are no things here." " Arrangements." "The barber writes down lists for the truck and the merchandise that..." "it's..." "I don't know." ""I shall raise my eyes..."" "Hello, friends." "Finished." "Karmi, write down two boxes of wood nails for the truck." " Mr. Gurevitch, is this typical weather for this time of year?" "Alright." "Who's in line?" " Is there a line?" " Who's in a hurry?" "I have blood pressure." "I thank you for your kindness." "Shave?" " Please." " Rebecca." "I hope, gentlemen, that your blade is sharp, for my beard is known for its roughness." "What did I want to say?" "I wanted to ask, gentlemen, since you practice a public function of vital importance." "Did you consider, sirs, lending an official status to the functions you fulfill as a link to central government and as responsible for hospitality in the village." "Who?" " The baron!" "Finished." "A haircut, please." " Finished." "No, I wanted to ask you." " Finished!" "I thought I could expect a little politeness." "I am after all a figure of some importance... in the establishment's hierarchy." "Finished." " Finished." "Even the small tribe of Sheich Abu Suleiman" "Spread a red carpet at my feet." "He said to me, in front of all:" ""Mr. Dolniker, I am dust at your feet!"" "Today, no haircut." "Tuesday." "How much do I owe you?" " Here you don't pay." "Don't pay?" "Alright!" "Zeev!" "Zeev!" "Home, home!" "Where's the dove?" " In the coop, Dolniker." "My learned friend, you can stay." "I will not stay one day longer in this awful place." " Shhh..." "Don't shhh me," "I' II shhh you..." "Have you ever heard such a thing?" "Tuesday no haircut." "This looks like the coop!" " It's the coop." "Give me the message!" "Quick!" "Okay." " Here, here..." ""Help." "Send transport." "Mortal danger." "Dolniker" ""Mobile post Mount Cumin."" "Just add request for press." "They' II come anyway." " Good luck, friends." "Hold the ladder." " I' II hold it." "Where is it, goddamn it?" " It's in the basket." "I' II put my hand in." "Just a minute." "How long does it take, for God's sake?" "Tie a little message to its leg." "Not too tightly, don't stop the blood streaming." "Well?" "Well?" "Why doesn't it fly?" " Maybe it's happy here." "What's to be happy about?" "It has a mission!" " 11 Fly, fly!" "To the center." " 1, Dubnov st. - 11. - 11." "Don't confuse it." "Fly!" "Well, it's ignoring us on purpose." "Who are you?" "What are you doing here?" "We've been caught." "Let's get away immediately!" "Who are you?" "What are you doing here?" "Hurry!" "The whole village is after us!" "You stand around for half an hour with one dove..." "Why did you drag me to this awful village?" "A man my age?" "I wanted "Lagua Maggiore"." " Lagua Maggiore?" "That's what's in your head." "But to tie one little message to a little bird's leg, this you can't do." "You have to drag me along with you!" "Are you planning to take this home?" " No." "No?" "Then throw it away!" "Run!" "Run!" "Are you crazy?" "My husband is lying here in bed!" "Mommy, no, gentlemen." "No, my friend, let me explain." "Out!" "Old lover!" "Shame on you!" "This is the thanks I get for my hospitality?" "Allow me to clear this sorry matter up." "Damn all engineers." "Mr. Engineer." "Mr. Engineer." "Mr. Dolniker!" "Look at you!" "Oh, you men are all alike." "Allow me, ladies, to explain the situation." "What's to explain?" "Next time just be more careful." "Just tell me before." " Ladies..." " I' m Malka." "Show me your head!" "Oh, Mr. Engineer!" "How long are you staying at Mount Cumin?" "Unfortunately, not long." "For I cannot remain idle." "Not myself." " Myself..." "What a man!" "Talks like a school teacher." "Myself..." "What a sweet engineer!" "Firstly, ladies, I am not an engineer." "As for my sweetness, it was you who said it." "Tonight I' II..." "I' II wait for you in the woods." "What will you wait for me for, ladies?" "He's joking." "Tonight both of us, in the woods." "Just me and..." "Myself." "Someone's coming!" "Your caretaker." "If my husband asks, tell him you came in by mistake." "No, I cannot lie." "But..." "I' II make something up." "Good morning, Dolniker." "Did we fall down?" "Adventures aplenty." "Last night I went into the landlord's wife room." "I see, you made a mistake?" "Terrible back aches." " Wait." " The back, the back." " Here?" "A bit to the left." "Here." "Yes." "Like a crazy wolf." "It's alright." "We' II soon be out of here." "No hurry, Zeev." "Go on, go on." "After all, we came here to relax, I believe." "I have no real objective complaints, Zeev, concerning this nice village." " Nice village?" "Objectively." " Let's admit it:" "These village folk are potential human stuff." "Stronger, Zeev." "The other side." "There." "And if it weren't for their backwardness we could even create a solid village." " How do you feel, Dolniker?" "How's the blood pressure?" "The heart?" "I've never felt better." "Let's go!" "Zeev, I see I may be having some trouble walking." "But let's say, temporary trouble, nothing grave." "Hold on, Zeev." "Here, that's it." "There." "Let go, let go, Zeev." "It's alright." "Let go." "I' m alright." "Let go, Zeev, let me go." "There is no organization." "No administration here." "If only someone would teach these good people some elementary socialist political concepts." "What?" "What are they missing?" " What?" "Is it normal, ladies and gentlemen, that this village does not even have a leader, a head?" "No one takes public office without benefits." "Except you, of course." " That's true." "What benefits could they get here?" "This." " What?" " Transport." "What transport?" "Zeev, what are you talking about?" "Are you following me at all?" "For god's sake!" "Transport?" "Zeev, you've passed the test." "And by transport I mean personal vehicle." "Do you comprehend?" "Yes?" "Thank god!" "How was the idea?" " Excellent." "I see you' re starting to feel the political pulse." "Closed!" " Closed, closed, it's Thursday." "No shave, no shave!" "I have not come for that, but for public matters." "What does he want from me?" " A haircut." " We' re closed." "Friends, I only came here to help you." "I came to leave Mr. Hasidov a coach I rented for him." "A coach?" " A coach!" " Why for me?" "Because you are the Village Head." " What head?" "Head de facto." "It's not nice to talk to people like that." "Why?" "Is not your husband, Mrs. Hasidov, the village's official merchandise administrator?" "The village's..." " Quiet!" "Right, they always force poor Zalman to do it." "Now, ladies and gentlemen, he shall get his due." "The office vehicle will be at his disposal tomorrow." "Nonsense!" " Why not, Zalman, why not?" "Why don't you let your skinny legs rest?" "If Mr. Engineer has rented that thing" "For free." " Of course," "The vehicle is attached." " Just a minute..." " Attached." "...Woman, what will people say?" "I will not make a joke of myself, no, no, sir," "I will not sit in that thing, never!" "Mrs. Hasidov, what a shame!" " No, no, sir," "You don't know me." "When I say no I mean no, no, no!" "I got it as a gift." "I didn't want it." "It's just temporary." "I didn't want it." "I didn't want it." "Free." "Free." "Just temporary." "Zalman, the attached head." " Quiet, quiet!" "What?" "Let them know." "Zalman is head de facto!" "Rebecca, shame on you!" "It's temporary, I' m not..." "Zalman is head de facto." "Coachman, stop on the way at the cobbler's please." "Guess who?" " Myself." " That's correct." "May I sit?" " Why not?" "Charmed, ladies." "You have a nice neck." " You find it so?" "All my family had nice muscular necks." "It must be hereditary." " Hold me, please." "Me?" " Yes." " It is an honor, ladies." "I am no longer a youth." "But I still have my force." "But you' re an engineer?" " Yes, I have that." "I like being with you." " So do I, Malka." "I feel attached since I first discovered you." ""Discovered"." " Such emotions don't often occur." "My breath stopped and my heart beat like a drum." "Like a drum, my heart, like a drum!" "I only remember one other such incident, ladies." "In a wonderful spring, it was." "I was young and handsome." "When the party secretary called me and offered me the job of managing the campaign." "Then I felt I was no longer mere talent, but a bird about to fly skyward." "Imagine, my sweet little Malka." "Me, a young activist on the one hand and the party opening its arms to me on the other." "How I got to all this, I think today I may reveal this whole extraordinary tale." "So, the manager, camarade Finkelstein..." "What's that over there?" "I' II show him!" "What a character!" "It was worth coming here just for you." "It's great you can't disturb me by talking." "What?" "You wanted to ask something?" "How did we get here?" "The engineer is on vacation." "Vacation..." "I, as always, follow." "You know, you' re quite like Dolniker." "He doesn't hear when people talk to him either." "He never talks either." "He lectures." "Speeches." "Don't get me wrong, I don't really like the old guy." "Neither him nor the other old guys with their posts." "And now, if we may, I'd like to start second round." "The rabbi said: " I heard you haven't washed"" ""Well", said the butcher, "the water was cold"." "The rabbi said, this is funny!" "The rabbi said:" ""Auf Kalatw blaz man nicht"!" "In Yiddish it's much juicier, of course." "Why did I tell this joke?" "Oh, yes, I remember now." "Of course today this might sound strange ladies and gentlemen, but imagine, Malka," "Amitz Dolniker worked in road construction once as a simple worker." "Yes, yes, but not physically, as the clerk." "But it's an important function." "Later, well, I climbed higher and higher in public service." "In 36 years, 36 years," "I became deputy chairman of parliament." "Three fruitful terms." "I had big plans." "Big hopes." "Amitz Dolniker in the Israeli government." "But somehow, in the middle, I don't know what happened." "Mr. Dolniker, I would like to speak to you privately." "Why, why now?" "It's lunch!" "I would really like to, for both of us." "No, only in this forum, only in this forum." "My caretaker must be present." "Mr. Engineer, I would also like a coach." "Oh, is that it?" "Why didn't you say so?" "Zeev, don't lean on me like that." "Mr. Hermanovitch." "Unfortunately the coach is at the head's disposal." "I don't understand." "He's the stupidest man here." "He has tenure, friend." " I want tenure too." " Please!" "Talk to the barber." " Lf he wants..." "Gentlemen, for now let us keep the status-quo." "As for last night, believe me, dear Mr. Hermanovitch it was..." " A mistake." "A thousand apologies." "Let's not make a thing of it." " You made a mistake." "Surely, surely." "Why are you so sure?" " Mr. Dolniker, at your age?" "My age?" "What about it?" "Mr. Hermanovitch," "I would not recommend putting me to the test," "I may surprise you." "So please, please." "As long as you write me down for being head too." "With a coach." "Congratulations." ""How quiet and calm is" ""the cow" ""how it eats" ""its eyes are red" ""its udders round and filled with milk"" "Take that silly smirk off your face, my friend." "We are not in parliament but you have to keep" "Dolniker's reputation here as well." "What are you talking about?" " You know very well." "You and your mistress." " Oh, don't worry, sir." "Only me and Dvora saw you last night in the woods." "They won't hear it from me." "You were around?" " It so happens." " Thank you." "You' re welcome." "At your age, enjoy." "Well, did you hear what Hermanovitch said..." "Old fogey!" "And how's your little one?" ""...dear soul..."" "Join in, Zeev." " I don't know the words." "Sing la-la-la." "Never mind, Zeev." "Okay?" " A bit more salt." " Makes sense." "What's new in religion?" " Thank god, all is well but there are a few problems." "We don't have money for a synagogue." "But the barber's wife rides in a coach." "The wife of the head, friends." "Mr. Sefaradi, you will also have a function here and your important wife will have a vehicle." "You are a religious leader, if I' m not mistaken." "I' m just the butcher, Mr. Engineer." "You are a rabbi." " De facto?" " Something like that." "Sefaradi, grow a beard!" " Okay." " Rabbi or not?" "The head's soup doesn't need checking." "Right, engineer?" " True, true." "The head has immunity." "Everyone wants to be de facto all of a sudden." "We didn't even know we had a head here before." "They want, gentlemen, a change in power." "Shame on them, disgusting!" "What people don't do!" "A song of longing." " For whom?" " The cow." "Look who's coming!" "Listen, Zalman!" "I think it's not fair that you do all the work." "I will take the lists for the truck off you." "Writing." " Okay..." " I just wanted to tell you, that you, Zemah, are too busy." "And besides you don't write too well." "Woman, I' m talking to Zalman!" "Listen, Gurevitch, we' II leave it open for now." "Status..." "as the engineer says." "As for my shoes, Zemah, that I sent in yesterday, for you to repair." "I' II send the coachman to get them." "Mr. Engineer, I have a bad leg." "I want to go to the fields like a head in a coach." "Dear friend." "It is not I who decide, but a fair democratic fight." " I' m ready." "In a day or two the committee will assemble and the municipality will decide." "Please." "Let the municipality decide whatever." "Zalman!" "Barbarians!" "What have they done to your eye?" "Those animals!" " The generation of the desert." "Didn't you say the municipality will decide?" "Please, now he's crying." "Really, like a kid." "Each day another eye." "Still, I' m de facto!" " You?" "De facto?" "Midget!" "Quiet!" "Friends, what is wrong with you?" "What is wrong with you, for god's sake?" "Democracy is a fragile instrument." "Punches and kicking will not determine leadership, but free elections." " Isn't this free enough?" "Friend Gurevitch, I warn you, whoever uses violence as a weapon will lose his right to be elected head." "What head?" " Zalman." " Why Zalman?" "Because he has a coach." "Right, engineer?" " More or less, ladies." "Your husband is head in fact, that's right, but this forum will choose a head de jura." "De facto, de jura." "What's that, de jura?" " Zalman!" " Just a minute, we must first prepare ideologically." "What, please?" " Political parties!" "Political parties." " Oh, like friends of Zion!" ""Raise the flag of the Jehuda camp!" ""Who on foot..."" " Listen, listen, engineering office's memo a." "The head is the committee administrator..." "First we create a proper society and then we can return home triumphant." "And meanwhile?" " Meanwhile, friends, we start constructing the committee by social differences in the dominant classes." "Dolniker, what classes are you talking about?" "There are no classes here." "All farmers are alike." "A house, cumin, cows, stupidity." "No difference." "A shame, you see?" "A shame." " Why a shame?" "That's the goal of a socialist regime:" "Complete equality, isn't it?" " Right, it is, but don't forget we' re just beginning." "There is a certain process." "Let's see." "We have two big blocks." "The cobbler's is one and the barber's is the other." "Government and opposition." "Only, there's a problem." " What?" " They' re employers." "Yes, material people." "If we could find a hired hand in this village, oppressed." " There is one." " Who?" " Me." "What?" "I can't send my caretaker to the committee." "I am your secretary, Dolniker." " I know, it's just local jargon." "Friends, I think I found a dormant communist." "Hello, friends." "How much does it cost to fix soles and heels, please?" "It depends, two bags of cumin for a small sole." "And your monthly salary, if I may ask?" "I don't know." " Still, friends?" "Ask Zemah." " Indeed, Zemah!" "Obviously." "Zemah will pocket the profits, since you, friends, do not know." "But Mr. Engineer hasn't given me any shoe for repair." "You look hungry and thin, friends." "You should work less." "How many hours a day do you work here, Gurevitch?" "As much as I want." " That's too much!" "Too much." "Don't you see, they' re taking advantage of you." "You must go to Zemah and clearly say to him:" ""Zemah, starting today I will no longer work" ""as much as I want"." "And if he refuses, go on a wild strike, which is legitimate." " Alright." "Go to him and say:" ""Zemah, starting today" ""I want to work one hour less a day"." "You understand?" "He' II say half an hour." "We' II go down 10 minutes, you see?" "And if there's a confrontation or dead end:" "To the barricades!" " What?" ""Onward to the barricades..."" "Okay, now Mr. Engineer will go home." "I will arrange these matters." "No, you don't understand, friend." "This problem is the worker's essence!" "From now on you represent all the workers out there," "All the oppressed." " Zemah, Zemah," "Don't come in, he's here." "What is it?" " Now, go ahead." "Listen, Zemah." "Mr. Engineer wants me to work one hour less today." "Go ahead." " Not just today, every day." " Go ahead." "This old man has elementary rights!" "Mr. Engineer, my father works as much as he wants." "You don't have to remind me he's the owner!" "This is a cobbler's shop, I mean..." "What does it matter?" "It's yours, it's his..." "I just wanted to ask, I have a shoe it's tight, can it be repaired?" "Well, I' II come tomorrow." "Good day to you." ""Onward to the barricades..."" "Dear friends, dear parliament." " Mount Cumin." "Dear Mount Cumin!" "I am happy and proud to hereby open the first temporary committee's assembly of our village." "Friends, do not approach the desk." "Be seated." " Okay, we didn't know..." "What?" " All beginnings are difficult, Zeev." "Dolniker, much better, much better." "Do you think?" "My eye started twitching today." "It's a question of a couple of days till it's over." "Me, me!" " Please, friend." "I propose to build an office for Zalman." "What, the barber shop isn't good enough?" " Too small." "You' re too small yourself!" "First build a synagogue." " And a stove in my kitchen." "What else?" " Why do you need an office for a haircut?" "Why?" " Committee member Gurevitch" "I call you to order." "Erase that from protocol." " Erased." "Friends, friends, you must understand." "Each one of you may be head tomorrow." "Oh, sure!" "God helping." "General consensus, gentlemen." " I see." "Mr. Engineer, where do we take the money to build the head's office from?" " From taxes, of course." "Sure!" " I see." "Each farmer who has land will pay the committee." "Not good, Zemah has a lot of land!" "I' II pay by my kitchen's size." "Because you have a small kitchen, huh?" "Friends!" " Taxes should be payed by blades!" "By shofar!" "You' re just a bystander, you!" " Shut up, rabbi!" "Say what you wanted." "By shofar!" "Erased." "Friends, in my humble opinion the most just system will be to augment municipal taxes on luxury items." "I request a recess." " Why not?" "Recess, friends." "Secrets." " That's legitimate." "Very nice, Malka." " So, how's it going?" "Getting on the king's road." " Thank god." "So, tonight as usual?" " What as usual?" " Well..." "Oh, in the woods?" "Mr. Engineer, we propose as a basis for taxes:" "A big closet." " With three doors." " Why such a closet?" "Because we don't have one." "They learn fast, these guys." "Let them, let them." "There is one problem, Mr. Engineer." "No one has such a closet in the whole village." "Then, what is the point in such a proposal, if I may ask?" "That is the question, gentlemen." "Excuse me, Mr. Chairman, if I may." "I think it's not important who has such a closet, but who could have one." "Speak to the people." " Please, your honor." ""When we die let them bury us in a 3-door closet." ""There are people there..."" " Enough, gentlemen!" "Gentlemen, I am indeed happy about the festive atmosphere here" "But you must find a solution to a fair tax system." "I recommend we choose the head tax agent," "I recommend as the head tax agent:" "Mr. Gurevitch" "Senior." "Zemah, I' m a tax collector!" "Zemah!" "Zemah!" "Help!" "Zemah!" "Help me, help me, Mr. Engineer, they want to kill me because of that closet with 3 doors." " What closet is that?" "This is wrong, gentlemen." "Have you taken the law into your hands?" "Very grave." ""Onward to the barricades..."" "Get up, old man." "Stand straight." "You are a chosen official." "Don't forget that." "Get up, get up!" "This, friends, is called authority." "I don't want this, it's the cows!" "A law without teeth is like teeth... without law." " I don't understand." "You will, friends." "Shepherd, come forward." "Will you join in, friends," "In the effort to enforce law?" " I' m with the cows," "You look strong and intelligent, friends." "As temporary chairman, I propose you fulfill the role of village policeman." " Who?" "Policict, yes?" "I, I' m no cop." " Who said anything about cop?" "I propose head of Mount Cumin police." "Captain-major?" " Prefect." "Prefect to what?" " You' II end up colonel." "Colonel, that's something else, but..." "Not just a cop..." "But who' II take care of the cows if I' m Captain" "General Policeman?" " Who will?" "I will." "Yes..." "Cow engineer." " What of it?" "Amitz Dolniker will be the village shepherd." "I always believed in giving a personal example." "Today me, tomorrow you." "Well then, friends, to the meadow." "Who will be the first volunteer for tomorrow morning, take one step forward!" "Keep an eye on the black one." "She's rebellious." "You, brown cow, I call you to order!" "Dolniker, you' re not in parliament." "We are witnessing an unprecedented event." "What?" " Nothing, I stepped in some organic waste." "You did not pay taxes." " For what?" " No vulgarity, Zeev." "The committees meetings are going well, free elections are on the way..." "What's that?" "The committee building is coming along fine." "And all this..." "All this, Zeev, within one political framework." "You have to pay taxes." " Taxes." " You must pay." "A political framework?" " All beginnings are difficult." "Growing pains." "Stop that noise." "It's annoying me." "Leaf sounds." "A part of nature." "May I confide in you?" "I enjoy doing nothing." "Dolniker enjoys doing nothing!" " I can see." "Charming." " Eat something." " Where's the cumin?" "What?" "In front of your nose." "Malka, Malka, stop, your husband might see us." "Elifaz can't see a thing." "He's away." "Away where?" " He went to town with the truck." "Do you know what he' II bring?" "An oil painting, and a gold watch for me." "What do you need a gold watch for, Malka?" "Everyone is ordering all kinds of things." "And it's not really gold, it just looks like it." "But what do you need a gold-looking watch when you have god's gold watch above you?" "But it doesn't show the seconds." " So what?" "Dear Mr. Engineer, a woman in my position has to be punctual." "I mean I' m the wife of a committee member, not just a simple farmer." "And besides, excuse me, it's time we municipal village women got organized." " What for?" "To establish women's status in the village, and to strengthen my own status." "No, no, no!" "Dolek, Doliki, how you've changed!" "Wait, gentlemen, don't push please, there's a queue!" "Driver, did you bring a music box?" "What about my dishes?" " Everyone will get theirs." "Let me work!" "There's imported aftershave." "How many bottles?" "3. - 3. - 3." "Who else?" "Toffee!" " Caramel toffee next week only!" "What about my dishes?" " Dishes." "Where is my shofar?" " Here's an automatic one." "What do you mean?" " On battery." "Catch!" "You like it, kids?" " We do, teacher." " Let's go." "The head!" "Coachman, take my wife home and come back in 40 minutes." "Zalman, I need the vehicle." "I've got a lot to do!" " Rebecca, I asked you not to use the coach on working hours." "Go!" "Careful, careful!" "With feeling, slowly, it's a 3-door closet." "Take it to my home." "Then unload the office material." "What is this gathering, Zeev?" "It's your secretary's desk..." "Purchase." " Be careful." " Like children." "You can't leave them alone for one minute." "With feeling." "I said with feeling." "Slowly, slowly." "A very good joke indeed." "I can only see 4 pillars of the committee building." "But in turning this whole village to one big store, you've managed very quickly." " Careful!" "May I ask, gentlemen, how will the cumin harvest be if everyone is just idling about?" "Do you think the harvest will be good?" "No, no, definitely not." "If the harvest is poor, will not the village's income be poor as well?" "Please, not in this forum." " Why not?" "Listen, Mr. Engineer, if the harvest is bad." " That's very good." "Then there won't be enough cumin all over the country and the prices will rise." "I said be careful with that!" "A good harvest is a catastrophe." "Money, gentlemen, is not everything." "There is also world view." " Why is it a bad world view to make more money with less work?" "Just like that, the prices..." "Listen, at least us engineers, we understand each other, right?" "Excuse me, my chair has arrived." "Please, slowly, that's my chair!" "Slowly!" "Put it down, this is the place." "Good!" "Good!" "Stop that!" "A whole village going to ruins in front of your eyes and you don't care?" " What's the problem?" "No, Zeev, these are not the same sweet people" "I met here when I arrived." "God knows what happened to them." " A dibbuk." "Someone put a dibbuk in this village." "But how?" "We've been here all along!" "You ask me how?" "Maybe I've a little something to do with it." "I should have told them from the start that I will not take part in any public activity." "You could have reminded me, couldn't you?" "But your mind was elsewhere." "Come on, Dolniker." " Zeev, I' m very disappointed." "Very disappointed in you." " What is this?" " Propaganda for elections, but why this vulgar style!" ""How did the bald barber get money for a closet?"" "Why do they have to write "bald"?" " Because he is." "Zeev, Zeev, your wit!" "Go to the committee and tell them" "Dolniker said." " No, Dolnier, I' m sorry," "I' m sick of this whole business." "You wanted to raise the village's level?" "I think the level is very high." "I' m not playing anymore." "Consider me out." "I' m out." ""Why is the cobbler's daughter's belly growing?"" "Zeev, son of David, son of Israel" "Do you take this virgin..." "Dvora, daughter of Gurevitch?" "Strike." "Well?" " Well?" " Well?" "Look at you!" "I can't take you anywhere anymore!" "I' m working." "I haven't finished milking the cows." "Give me a break with those cows!" "No talking during the ceremony." " Just explaining." "Put more simply, Mr. Caretaker:" "Will you marry this young woman?" "Look, gentlemen." "How can I even be certain that it's..." "Sure I will. - " If I forget thee Jerusalem..." ""Song of the bride groom, Song of the bride"" "I now pronounce you husband and wife." "Son!" "Congratulations!" "My son!" "Gentlemen!" "I will register in my beloved son's name part of my fertile cumin lands!" "Where to?" " To see the bride!" "Don't worry, he just went out for a breath of air..." "Oh, you can't hear..." "Don't worry, wait here." "I' II go get him." "No, don't move." "Don't move!" "Zeev, what's the matter?" "The little girl is worried." "I congratulate you from the bottom of my heart, son." "This is the best thing you've done in 10 years." "Getting married." "Raising a new generation of workers." "Why are you sad, Zeev?" "Look, your public career has reached the top." "You were secretary to Amits Dolniker." "How much higher could you have climbed?" "Amits Dolniker's secretary?" " Yes." "The top?" " Yes." "A career... with you?" "Who are you anyway, Dolniker?" "What are you?" "What do you do besides babble for hours on end like an old record player." "Silly nonsense words." ""I' II raise a new generation of workers"" "Who are you preaching to?" "Poor dreamer." "Old fool." "Tell me, Dolniker," "When was the last time you held a pick in your hand?" "When did you ever grow one stinking flower in a pot?" "Do you have a profession?" "Any knowledge?" "You lead the workers." "Have you ever spoken to one?" "Dolniker, don't you feel you' re being laughed at?" "Do us all a favor." "Go to a rest home." "Give us a rest, we don't want any more Dolnikers!" "You don't?" "Fine." "Maybe I am just an old man, who hasn't done anything but babble all his life." "Maybe I am just a dreamer who hasn't built a thing, but this old man gave all his soul for what he did." "Or didn't do." "And you, my talented practical caretaker, you got to your status very quickly," "but with no faith and no joy." "Just for the career." "Yes." "When Dolniker goes to a rest home at last, he will go poor and innocent," "with nothing left from his whole life but the belief that he served his people." "And you, Zeev, you would even take this from me." "I' m afraid I won't be able to mention you in my autobiography." "Thank you very much, nice shoes." "Is that all?" "Gurevitch shoes vote for the cobbler!" "It's okay now." "Go." "I trust you, gentlemen." "Next!" "I trust you will vote for the almighty?" "God willing." " Very well." "God bless you." "You want a permit for ordering binoculars?" " Yes." "What kind?" " The kind that sees far." "Did you submit a request?" " In 7 copies." " Sit down, sir" "Sit down, sir." "Do you have a number?" " 17b." "We open a file." "Hello?" "Hey, phone call." " What?" "Secretariat, hello." " Hello." "Stay on line, the head wants to talk to you." "Good morning." "This is engineer Hasidov." "Yes, Mr. Head." "Is the line long?" " As you can see." " What?" "We' re managing, sir." "Continue till I tell you otherwise." "Understood?" " Yes" "Sign here please." "You will get a written reply." " And the permit?" "In 3 months." " That long?" "Who will you vote for?" " The barber." "Two weeks." " Thank you." "Password?" " "The head will be unemployed."" "What?" "The head is head is head!" "Dismissed." "Next!" " Me. 17 c." "Tell me, Zalman, do they have to wait in the office?" "Why not?" " They' re sweaty." "During elections, we must endure, my dear." "I will not endure!" " Shut up!" " Okay." "Where are you going, friend?" " Zalman the barber." "He's out." " What do you mean?" "I can see him." "Perhaps." "He's out." "Do you have an appointment?" " What?" " Sorry." "I' II fix you an appointment for Sunday." "You can kiss me." "You stammerer!" "I do not stammer!" "I' m a high official!" "For god's sake, Zalman!" "Why are you isolated like a king?" "The head is busy right now." "What is the matter, my friend?" "The matter is that you built yourself a barn with public funds." "Instead of the municipal building." "Want to file a complaint?" " I want to know the truth." "Mr. Dolniker, excuse me." "Look, Dolniker, the building has been delayed so we took the money and invested in a barn." "But that's corruption." "Corruption!" "A public official cannot take public funds." "From cement bag to shoe lace." "How many cement bags did you steal, baldy?" "No comment!" " No comment?" "May I ask, my fair lady, what are you planning to do with the four pillars?" "Listen, Dolniker, I know very well who is interested in such provocation." "Gurevitch got three cement bags too!" "Engineer, you really shouldn't get involved." "It's an internal matter." "What's the difference?" "He got some, I got some, people got some." "You shouldn't get involved..." " We' II manage without." "You've turned this place into Sodom and Gamora!" "That's what you've done!" " Police!" "I want the police!" "This man is disturbing the peace!" "Put him under arrest." " Your hour is approaching." "When I came here I was so taken by your simplicity." "By your honesty..." "You' re just a consultant, Dolniker, I' m the head!" "You have no right of existence without honesty!" "Blow up!" " Idiots, sitting in the most beautiful place and turning it into a madhouse!" " Crime!" "But the cumin fields, you idlers, go to work!" "Mr. Engineer, Mr. Engineer!" "Where am I?" "Among friends, Mr. Engineer, among friends." "We came to apologize for yesterday's incident." "It was not meant to be personal, sir." "I despise you." "I want to leave this place!" "I want to go home." "Home!" "Please!" "You' re free to leave, Dolniker." "What do you want from me?" " Mr. Dolniker, teach me how to make a speech." " Is that it?" "No!" "I will not help you be elected anew." "No, then you shall starve, friend!" "Here you shall be buried, old man." "Wait, wait, we' re talking, aren't we?" "Dear Mr. Hasidov, you speak very well." "You speak like a real engineer." "But I want to talk like you." "For hours." "Without anyone understanding one word." "Like you, Mr. Engineer." "Thank you!" "Such impertinence!" "Whatever." "Gurevitch has locked up your caretaker." "He's getting great ideas from him." "The future-head Gurevitch will bring water here." "You must help me, Dolniker, you must!" "Okay, let me eat." "Starving a person like that." "Where is it?" "Bring it forth!" "Just a minute, Mr. Dolniker." "Not that I don't trust you, of course, but first the first lesson in public speaking." "No, first food." " First speeches." " Food." "Speeches." " Food..." "Perhaps a little of each?" "Some chicken for some words?" "Fair enough." "But first I have to tell you what this is like." "Okay?" "So." "Yes." "Once there was a butcher..." " No, no, no He went to the rabbi and said:" "And the rabbi said:" ""Auf Kalatw blaz man nicht"" "In Yiddish it's better." "Well, then, if I were in your shoes," "I would address my voters thus:" "Friends, workers." "Mr. Engineer, Mr. Engineer..." "It won't work for me." "I can't talk nice like you." "But this is just rubbish to stun them." "And that's exactly what we want, Mr. Dolniker." "Perhaps you have some ready rubbish?" "Something I can read off paper?" "It so happens I have here with me an article I wrote before I came here." "No, no, no..." "What's on the menu for tomorrow?" "Turkey in garlic sauce." "Not too burned." " No, not too burned." "Cucumber salad." " White wine." "Condiment?" " Prune." " Here." "Editor's note." "If we open our eyes upon the door we placed behind, with the passing year of our renewal," "and if we resume what the future holds, a question inevitably arises:" "Where are we headed?" "Damn, it's working." " "Whether", that's good." "Damn!" "Whether we unbuckle instead of buckle our belts, and if we dive in the muck of property, and the hogwash of fight, all these burning questions have but one possible answer, clear cut." "See page 5." "I tell you, Zalman, there will be no page 5!" "4 pages is enough!" " There will be no page 5!" "There will be a page 5!" "Down with page 5!" " There will be no page 5!" "There will be a page 5!" " There will not..." "There will be only page 5!" "Long live the crowd!" " Boo to 5!" "Long live the page!" " Go, 5, 5..." "Your list S.R." "The page is great!" "The barber will be head!" "Yes, yes, yes!" "Page 5 will not be, the barber is stupid!" "S.R., S.R." "Auf Kalatw blaz man nicht" "The cobbler is a cobblerist!" "Auf Kalatw blaz man nicht" "There is a shark in the sea The cobbler is a jerk!" "S.H., S. H..." " Cancel class differences!" "Barber and cobbler are the same." "...Barber and cobbler are the same." "Fly, fly, bird." "The cobbler is a psychopath." "I can speak!" "Gurevicth is a widower." "Vote for Zalman!" "Zalman makes a mess." "Down with the barber!" "Boo, boo, boo..." "Winnipeg Shminnipeg," "The whole village can go suck an egg." "S.H., S. H..." "I am the head!" "I was head and I will stay head till I die!" "Weapons?" "To the shed!" "Dolniker, quick!" "No, Zeev, I have pains in my chest." "I won't leave you here!" "Halt, halt!" "Stop!" "Stop!" "You' re under arrest!" "You won't vote!" "Malka..." " What is he saying?" "It's a shame to ruin such a nice village..." "Old fool, huh?" "Dreamer, old record player, huh?" "Driver, to the rest home!" "Maybe I can organize something over there..." ""The Fox in the Chicken Coop"" "Subtitles:" "Noa Ziv" "Subtitles:" "Elrom Studios"