"The digital restoration of "Hyppolit, the Butler"" "was funded by the Hungarian Development Bank" "Visual content digitalised and restored by the Hungarian Film Laboratory" "Sound content digitally cleaned by the Hungarian Film Archive" "The restored copy was prepared at the Hungarian Film Laboratory" "Hyppolit, the Butler based on a stage play of similar name by István Zágon adapted for the screen by Károly Noti photography:" "István Eiben, Eduard Hösch set design:" "Max Heilbronner music:" "Mihály Eisemann" "directed by István Székely cast:" "Blackbird!" "Warbler!" "Gee up!" "For the love of God!" "You are in a bad mood today." "What's wrong, Tóbiás?" "Run out of horsepower?" "They're low on petrol but I'll soon fire them up!" "Tell me when those fat sausages start to move!" "This sausage could kick you out of that tin can." " Hey, hey!" " Hey, hey!" "I hope you can see, Father, that we could sell those two horses." "Leave them alone." "Your great-great grandfather couldn't have set up this firm without them." " Remember, mankind..." " I know!" "...can thank horses for its culture." "If Hannibal took an army of men on horseback to Moscow?" "Papa, that wasn't Hannibal." " Then who?" " Napoleon." " Who?" " Napoleon." "He didn't take a taxi either!" "Take a look at that!" "Poor animals!" "Don't feel sorry for the horses!" "It's theirjob." "Come in!" "Good morning!" "What's to report, Benedek?" "There's a mistake in the calculation for the poultry delivery." "How many times have I said that Terka sees to international work?" "Yes, sorry, but this is a local delivery..." "Oh, local?" "Really?" " She does them too!" " Let me have a look at that!" "Sorry, but I think the first mistake is here." "I'm sorry but the first mistake is that you are in these dreadful clothes again." "Really." "And there is a discrepancy of 100 pengõ here." "That really is too much!" "You haven't even shaved!" "True!" "What do you want from this man?" " A manager really can't walk around looking like this!" " No!" "Wear formal attire tomorrow." "Do you own any spurs?" " Indeed I do!" " Grand!" "Put them on!" "Don't come in here again without your spurs on!" "Go and look for the original order!" "Of course!" "May I?" "I know that ring..." "It's your mother..." "Oh, mother!" "Hello!" "Hello, Mama!" "Hello, Mama!" "What's that, Mama?" "What about Terka?" "Yes..." "Your mother wants to have a word with you." "Hello!" "What are you playing at, Terka?" "Our dear friend Makáts has been sitting here waiting for you for half an hour." "Half an hour and two minutes, madam, if you will allow me." "But I could sit for eternity for Miss Terka." "Very good!" "How nice..." "But you promised to come home early!" "Tell him that I am busy." "You could also tell him to leave me alone." "Yes..." "My daughter sends her warm regards." "It' my honour, madam..." "You make me so happy." "And did Miss Terka say nothing else?" "Oh, but she did." "She did?" "And what did she say if I may ask?" "No..." "I don't want you to blush, Mr Makáts." "Oh, madam, I am flattered..." " My modesty forbids..." " When are you coming home?" " But you had plans to play tennis." " I am far too busy, Mother." "Tell that Mr Makáts not to wait." "What do you mean he shouldn't wait?" "He has to wait!" "Hello!" "Hello!" "Oh, she's put the telephone down." "For the love of God, understand that the rubbish business depends on Makáts's uncle." "If we get it, you'll be a very rich girl." "I don't believe in this concession at all." " I do!" " You play tennis with him then!" "Tennis?" "Is that a sport?" "He can play me at cards, if he dares!" "I'll thrash him!" "How are you playing?" "I opened with a quart and I'll start with one hundred and thirty!" "You can't play with that!" "A round, a round!" "Jozsi!" "A round of drinks!" "A round for Mr Schneider!" "It isn't so easy to be a driver, you know." "A driver depends on two things:" " his horse and his boss." " True." "Well you can always get on with a horse because the beast has got a brain..." " But a boss like..." " Right you are..." "There you go, Tóbiás." "You see?" "It's the sixth beer that he's bought for me when he knows that I don't like beer." "You really could invite us over sometime." "He could but his wife wouldn't let him!" "We're not..." "We're not posh enough." "My wife?" "Am I afraid of my own wife?" "I say what goes in my own house." "It's seven o'clock." "We should be going!" "What do you mean?" "I still have a beer to drink." "I wouldn't." "It'll lead to trouble." "I want another beer!" "Should I ignore the mistress's orders?" "He can find himself another job tomorrow because" "I'm going to sack him." "All I am saying is that it would be best to hurry." "Shut up because it looks like I'm going to sack you in the morning." " You're too late." "He can't hear you." " But I told him." "He can't complain because I've told him now." "Right you are!" "Don't you give in!" " Do I give in?" "Do I ever give in?" " You shouldn't." " But I'll have to be going!" " You're scared of your wife!" "Mátyás, you're scared of your wife!" "I want to go now and that's different." "If I want to go, I go." "But, Chairman, another glass..." " Long live the chairman!" " Hear!" "Hear!" "Song Slaughterers on deck!" "Maestro!" "One, two, three..." "Oh, beer is a drink to sing about..." "But not that wine should be left out..." "I don't want a butler." "I want a chambermaid!" "Oh, heavens!" "Who has a chambermaid nowadays?" " A respectable household has to have a butler." " Yes, yes." "But..." "This butler served 27 years for a count." "Really?" "Good evening, sir!" "Very well then!" "Is the table laid?" " Not yet, sir!" " Not yet?" " Not laid at seven o'clock?" " But, sir, the mistress..." " And?" " He'll be there in half an hour." " Good day to you." " Good day!" "Your servant, sir." " Who was that old fiddler?" " He's the maid agent." " Mama, you don't want another maid." " I do." " You can't have enough maids." " Why not?" "Why not?" "It only takes one to get supper in time." "I need two!" " One is too many for me." " Leave me alone!" "Papa, I don't like the way that girl takes so long saying goodbye to Istvan Benedek." "Me neither." "I'm starving and she just stands there talking." "Thinking about your stomach?" "What should I think about?" "It's half past seven already!" "He's still just a common driver, who..." "That driver is now a manager and the company owes him a great deal." "Madam, Miss Terka is here." " At last!" "Where is she?" " She's gone to her room." "Julcsa, what is for supper?" "Cold roast goose, sir." "Bring a couple of spring onions with it... and a couple of sprung ones too!" "Onions with goose?" "!" "But, sir!" "What will the mistress say?" "!" "I'll turn away when I talk to her." "Good day!" " Who are you visiting?" " I want to see Mr Schneider." " Is he at home?" " Yes, he's at home." " Announce me, if you will." " What should I do?" "Go in and all you have to say is "Hyppolit"!" " What should I say?" " All you have to say is "Hyppolit"." "I can say it if you insist!" "Where's the supper?" "And where's Terka?" " That girl is so unreliable." " Let her be." "I've told you that I won't have onions on the table!" "No, I'll eat goose with violets and anemones from now on." "Hippodrome!" " What?" " Hippodrome!" "What's that?" "There's a man outside who said I should come in and say "Hippodrome"!" " But what's his name?" " I don't know." " All he said was "Hippodrome"." " Do you mean Hyppolit?" "You could say it like that but there'd be no point." "Very well." "Tell him to come in." "Mama, who is Hyppolit?" "I forgot to tell you that I've employed a butler." " A butler?" " Yes, I wanted it to be a surprise." " It is!" " I hope you're not angry, Papa!" "I'm not." "Why should I be?" "I'll kick him out so hard, he'll fly!" "You won't." "You'll put yourjacket on." "You can't greet him like this." "He served a count for 27 years." "He won't work here that long." " But, Papa!" " Leave it to me." "Madam..." "Sir!" " No... it's in my pocket." " Yes, sir." "Thank you." "Please take a seat." "Thank you." "You say something too!" " So, you are going to be joining us?" " At your service!" "Why did you leave the count?" "There was a conflict of interest..." " Financial?" " Oh, no." "Money was never an issue in the count's house." "You see." "Because one would never ask for more than one is worth." "It isn't worth discussing." "Good." "Let's not talk about it." "He must be a real gentleman, Julcsa." "I've got an eye for things like that." "If only we could travel to places like this together." "Paris, Berlin, Rome..." "Bruxelles and Soroksar." "We can't travel the whole world." "If you'll excuse me, I would like to note down your daily timetable." "When does the master wish to take his bath?" "Sunday... and Monday." " At what time?" " Eight o'clock." "And for the rest of the week?" "A quarter to nine." "Do you prefer a hot or a cold bath?" "A bit of this and a bit of that." "Madam, when does your masseur usually arrive?" " Who?" " The masseur." "You know, he comes every day." "Oh, yes... him, ah, him, he comes." " At nine." " Nine at night." "Morning!" "And in the morning!" "If he promises to come, he comes." "Of course madam keeps to a diet." "I beg your pardon?" " Weight control." " Oh yes, of course." "I will monitor the diet." "I am strict." "The countess did the same." "She would eat lettuce and cucumber for two weeks and for breakfast nothing more than a slice of toast with no butter and an apple." "No butter and an apple..." "I can reassure you, madam, that I am merciless in such matters." "Quite right." "That's what she needs." "Tóbiás..." "I think that the strange man came today because of Terka." " Don't be so silly, Julcsa." " You'll see." "There'll be a wedding here before too long." " Yes..." " We're not refined enough for that, Julcsa." "And small changes in the house, don't you agree?" "We have complete faith in you, Hyppolit, as a few small things need changing." "Because the furniture, you see..." "We will replace the furniture." "Is Italian Renaissance suitable?" " Italian?" " Resonance?" "Or Baroque?" "It is a very popular style." "And we will need more staff!" "So, as I said, discretion, discipline, and courtesy." "White gloves?" "Very good." "The mistress's diet is to be strictly controlled." " Crooked!" " What is?" "Shave every day!" "The master will soon be home." "Thank you!" "Madam..." "Thank you!" "Does madam find everything to her satisfaction?" "Oh, I am simply delighted, dear Hyppolit." "The house, the furniture..." "the staff... everything is superb." "I trust the master will be happy with the new fixtures and fittings." "Oh, he is sure to be delighted." "What do you want with my hat?" " Who are you?" " I'm the new second footman." " What?" " Second footman." "And where are the coat hooks?" "The cloakroom's in the basement." "Cloakroom?" "Are we in a theatre or something?" "Who are you looking for?" "Tell me, sweetheart, am I at the right address?" " This is the Schneider villa, isn't it?" " It is, sir." "Tóbiás, is that you?" " What's happened to you?" " Hippodrome." "Please hurry, Mátyás!" "The souppé is served at nine." " What will happen to what?" " The souppé is served." "And it is time you changed." "Get changed?" "Why should I get changed?" "What do you look like, Mama?" "Are we going to a ball?" "No but I got dressed for the souppé." "And you have to put your dinner suit on." "Me in a dinner suit?" "Are you mad?" "Ask Hyppolit." "The count dresses for dinner..." "I'm not a count and I'm not interested." "Mátyás, go and put your dinner suit on!" "Listen here, Mama!" "You have thrown out my furniture and I don't recognise my own home, fine!" "You call supper, souppé, fine." "Now you call me Mátyás, fine." "But put a dinner suit on to honour my own beef stew?" "Never!" "Understand, Mama, never!" "And I am going to kick Hyppolit out!" "But Hyppolit knows about etiquette." "Etiquette, etti..." "Oh!" "There'll be no dinner suit tonight!" "Hyppolit!" "There'll be no dinner suit." "Sir." "Dear Terka, don't do that!" "Can't you see that I want to talk to you?" "No!" "Thank you, sir, for loving me, and foryour protecting me." "But don't send me flowers again, sir." "Thank you, sir, foryour kindness, but it might not be time, as my heart belongs to another." "But why should I keep up this foolish pretence, when we can say farewell like two dearest friends?" "Thank you, sir, for loving me, and foryour protecting me." "But don't send me flowers again, sir." "A waltz says more than words can say." "It steals a lady's heart away." "A good Hawaii blues, that makes me choose you today." "Rich music, wonder and delight, a dance and a kiss to complete the night." "It takes nothing more for it all to be right." "She thanks me for loving her, and for my protecting her." "But don't send me flowers again, sir." "She thanks me for my kindness, though it might not be time, as her heart belongs to another." "But why should I keep up this foolish pretence, when we can say farewell like two dearest friends?" "Thank you, sir, for loving me, and you're your protecting me." "But don't send me flowers again, sir." " Tóbiás, there's trouble." " What?" "The mistress has just told Mr Hyppolit to throw Mr Benedek out if he arrives." "That..." "Mr Benedek is here." "Who might I?" "Mister Engineer, sir?" "You must be confusing me with someone." "I couldn't help recognise the young count's best friend." "Please, not a word to anybody, Hyppolit." "I hope I can count on your discretion." "As you wish, sir." "No engineer, only Istvan Benedek the driver, or, if you like, manager." "A driver with a degree on engineering?" "The degree isn't important but a good driver can always find work." "I understand, sir." "Miss Terka really is very pretty." "Dear Hyppolit, I think you go to the cinema too often." "I'm sorry, Mister Engineer, ...Mister Manager." "The manager." " Good day, Benedek." " Miss." " Are the files here?" " Yes, just as you asked." " Let's go into the conservatory." " Very well." "Hyppolit, tell Papa that" " Mr Makáts is waiting for him." " Yes, miss." "Have you seen the Kazilitzky furniture?" "Yes, I have." " After you." " We need to calculate the number of trucks." "The dining furniture will need an 8-metre truck." "It's all very cumbersome." "French Baroque and German Renaissance." "I'm sorry?" "French Baroque and German Renaissance." "And the bedroom has a Louis XV, beautiful, large bed." "For two." "It must be beautiful." "And there is a painting above the bed:" ""Faun with Protesting Nymph"." "And there's the collection of Murano glass." "How do you know about such things as Murano and Renaissance?" "And why have you come to a business meeting dressed as a marquis?" "I apologise." "This is really a very plain suit." "Really?" "Please continue." "That's nothing!" "Listen to this." "The teacher is explaining something in the classroom and sees Moricka's mouth is wide open." ""Moricka, your mouth's open!"" ""I know, sir, I left it open. "" "Each better than the last." "Interesting." "That dress is so simple, so sweet, and so feminine." "Nowwhere were we?" "Yes." "So the Louis XV large, wide bed and the collection of Murano glass that..." "That was enough for today." " We will continue tomorrow morning." " As you wish." "That's nothing." "I've got another." " Another?" " Yes." "A Jew is travelling on the train." "But they have beards this long." "No, he was clean-shaven." "You have missed a great deal." "Mr Makáts has been telling jokes." "I can imagine." "Dinner is served." "At last!" "The first intelligent word this evening." "One, two, three, four." "One, two... three, four..." " Enough!" "We're finished!" " Thank God for that!" "Nowwe'll pick up a little paper." " Couldn't we have a short break?" " Heavens, no!" "Madam has gained a little weight this week." "Knees straight when we bend." "Hyppolit, do I have to?" " Well, the count does." " Alright..." "I know, I know." "And it is madam's wish." "Very well." "One at a time, please." "Please finish while I am changing but one at a time!" "Mr Schneider, I'm here with the..." " Mr Schneider!" " Hippodrome." "This would be too much work even for an ant." "Allow me." "What is that red stuff?" " Beetroot?" " Salmon." " Good." "And the red?" " That's salmon." "Interesting." "Only a couple of months ago it was beetroot." " Thanks God, I'm finished!" " Congratulations." "I hope I've earned my breakfast." "Yes, but just an apple and nothing else." " Bon appetite, Father!" " Thank you." "Terka, what do you think this red stuff is?" "Salmon!" " How do you know?" " Well..." "Children today..." "I've asked Benedek here." "If I'm late, make him comfortable." " Alright." " And offer him a little breakfast." "Salmon!" " Good morning, Mama!" " Good morning!" "Mama, what do you think that red stuff is?" " Salmon." " Mama, you're going to laugh at me." "I always thought salmon was a fish." " It is." " Really?" "Aren't you hungry?" "No, I'm not hungry." "Eat something." "A little mouthful won't do any harm." "Your apple, madam." "Mátyás, I think that'll be enough, my dear." "But, Mama, I've had my..." "Very well, I'll eat a few more bites." " Mr Istvan Benedek is here." " Tell him to come in!" "No!" "I'll go out!" "Mr Benedek!" " Good day, madam." " Please take a seat." "Thank you." "Where is Miss Terka?" "Terka?" "In the country." "In the country?" " She asked me here." " Really?" "She is with Mr Makáts, who..." "And they are sure to announce it soon that..." "I see!" " So Miss Terka and Mr Makáts..." " Yes." "He'll soon be your boss!" "He'll be joining the company." "Congratulations!" "What is it, Mr Benedek, do you have news?" "Nothing new." "Only that I left the company today." "You sent that fine, young man away?" "I can imagine what Terka will say." "Leave it to me." " Give me that sandwich!" " Sandwich?" "You?" "Not a crumb!" "May I know your plans for the evening?" "We're having paprika chicken, aren't we?" "I mean do you intend to stay at home or do you prefer to appreciate the arts?" "What?" "What?" "Gentlemen of a certain age are great supporters of the arts." " The what?" " The arts." "Yes, they are..." "They are that." "Might I have the lady's address and name?" "What lady?" "I always arranged flowers for the count" " and small tokens." " Yes, very well." "Yes." "The lady's name?" "Erm..." "Erm..." "Mimi?" " Erm..." "Mimi?" " Mimi." "Mimi." "A fiery redhead..." "She was Baron Rappaport's girlfriend last year." " I trust I am well informed." " Yes, yes." "Better than me." "I know the lady." " Her telephone number..." " What is it?" "What is it then?" "435-15." "435..." "And?" " 15." " Correct." " I'll call her right now." " No!" "God forbid, no!" "This is a respectful house." "We don't call any women from here!" "As you wish." "Unheard of!" "Hello!" "435-15." "What are you eating, Tóbiás?" " Madam." " Stay as you are!" "I brought it from the Rezeda Tavern." " My stomach can't take the French cuisine here." " Why?" " It's too light for me." " For me too." "You see, madam, that's what a goose leg looks like." "And they do wonderful roasted potatoes!" "I had a platter there..." " with bacon and all the trimmings." " Tóbiás!" "So will I see you?" "This evening?" "Where?" "The Hummingbird Bar?" "Again." "The Hummingbird Bar." "Yes." "But it would be better to meet in the lounge..." "Yes, Councillor..." "Yes, Councillor." "I'll be there!" "What a charming scent!" " What is it?" " "L'heure bleue"." " What?" " L'heure bleue." "Yes." "Might I know your plans for the evening?" " Do you intend to stay in or?" " No, I shall be going out." " The theatre perhaps?" " Yes, the opera." ""Tosca" is playing." "The left proscenium box is the best." " The count always took it." " Really?" " Might I recommend it?" " Thank you kindly." "I don't understand." "Benedek was here?" " He was but he left." " And when is he coming back?" "I don't think he's coming back at all." "What happened?" "!" "I don't know." "I don't want to interfere..." "Your mother spoke to him and he left." "I think your mother chased him away." " And you let her?" "!" " Me?" "Well, he left..." "I took the liberty of reserving a box at the opera for yourself and Mr Makáts this evening." "Thank you." "Take that watering can out of here." "I can't stand it!" "Hyppolit!" "What happened to Mr Benedek?" "I think that there was a difference of opinion... between the mistress and the engineer." " Engineer?" " I meant manager." "But you just said "engineer'." "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that." "Really?" "You shouldn't have." "Mr Benedek, a lady is here to see you." " Me?" " Yes." " Who?" " She didn't give her name." "Let her in." " Miss Terka!" " Good evening, Mister Engineer, sir!" " Engineer?" "So you know." " Yes but that's not why I'm here." " I came to discuss business." " Of course." "You resigned and we have accepted your resignation." "Your pay is 348 pengõ 16 fillér with all deductions." "Here's the receipt, sign it please." " Of course." " I have the cheque with me." "The only thing to finalise is the poultry delivery." "Thank you." "You were right, there is a mistake in the calculations." "I think the first one is here..." "No, the first mistake is that I forgot to congratulate you." " Me?" "What for?" " Your engagement." "Who told you that?" " Bring me a platter with all the trimmings." " Yes, madam." " Goose liver pâté to start." " Pâté." "Then sweet dumplings with lots of cream." "Dumplings with cream." "Then cheese, fruit, cake with more cream, and black coffee." "It would seem that a happy marriage needs a good rubbish collection concession." "You're right there." "I don't think I have anything further to say." "Good bye." " Terka?" " Do you want to say something?" "Do you think I'll let you go just like that?" "I signed the receipt but I didn't get the cheque." "There!" "Cheerio, sweetheart, cheerio." "It's the end of the show, and I have to go." "Oh, don't be so sad." "No, it's not that bad." "But I've got a new beau." "No need for sorrow." "I'll write a note though, and post it to you tomorrow." "Cheerio, sweetheart, cheerio." "It's the end of the show, and I have to go." "Love's not such a tragedy." "It's just how it had to be." "There'll be another girl soon, so" "No need to make a big seen." "Don't think what could have been." "Our love made a beautiful tune, oh!" "Cheerio, sweetheart, cheerio." "It's the end of the show, and I have to go..." "Good evening..." "Mr Schneider!" "You said you were going to the opera!" " Yes, somewhere with music." " Yes." " And you?" " Doctors order." "What are you doing here?" " It's important." " Is it?" " I have to support the arts." " Where is she?" " She'll be here in a minute." " Ah, little Mimi?" "I'll help you with the support if you want." " Hello, Mimi, hello." " Good evening." "My dear, please allow me..." "Waiter!" "Quickly..." "Here you are, madam." " Dear Makáts." " Yes." "You have to get me out of trouble tomorrow." "Yes." "You know my wife is a little difficult about such things." "I understand." "I'll organise everything." "I'll come over tomorrow morning and there'll be no trouble if I'm there." "I'm so drunk that everyone looks like a monkey." "I swear." "Mimi!" "Makáts!" "We'll meet here tomorrow at nine... in the Hummingbrird..." "Humm..." "Bumminghird Bar." " Hummingbird." " Good..." "Good." "Rendez-vous at nine!" "Alright, sunshine." "A date is a date!" "Oh..." "Morning, Mama." "What's wrong with you?" " Are you ill?" " Very ill." "My head, my stomach." "It's that stupid diet." " You think so?" " Definitely." " I think so too." " Yes." "I don't feel so good either." " In fact, last night..." " Oh, the opera..." "There... there... yes, there." "No, not there..." "There or thereabouts." "I couldn't go." " What?" "Didn't you go to the opera?" " You know." "I know alright but I just wanted to hear from you." " What did Makáts say?" " He was distraught." "Distraught." "It was bad to look at him." "I need to talk to him." "I need to make your apologies..." " Are you sure you weren't at the opera?" " Sure." "I'm saying that you weren't there." "It's a funny thing..." "It is very unfortunate, madam, that you weren't able to enjoy the music last night." "It really wasn't fair on the audience." "CITY OPERA HOUSE." ""Tosca" was cancelled last night as Tita Buffo had a sore throat." "Tickets can be refunded or exchanged." "Unbelievable!" "Julcsa!" "Listen to me or you're fired." "If Mr Makáts comes, tell him:" "Mr Makáts!" "Whatever happens, you went to the opera last night." "Repeat after me!" "Julcsa!" "Listen to me or you're fired!" "No that bit." "Mr Makáts..." "Mr Makáts..." "Whatever happens... you went to the opera last night." "Stay here and don't move until he arrives." " How did Tita Buffo sing?" " You've never heard anything like it." "I'm sure, but you heard it!" "But of course!" "It was glorious." " Really?" " Yes." "And especially when Tosca attacked the other one with a dagger." "You know..." "The one who was with..." "She said," ""Cheerio, sweetheart, cheerio." "It's the end of the show, and I have... "" " Then she stabbed him." " Tosca?" "!" " The other one." " With a sore throat?" "Sore?" "I wish I could sing with her sore throat." "Really?" "Good morning, Julcsa." "Mr Makáts..." "whatever happens, you went to the opera last night or I'm fired." "What?" "Mr Schneider said that Mr Makáts, whatever happens, went to the opera last night." " Last night?" " The opera." "The opera." "I understand." "I'm going to get to the bottom of this." "Madam." "Madam," " the opera was wonderful last night." " Really?" "I have heard a lot of opera in my life but none like this." " Really?" " Really." "The applause." "Oh, the applause!" "The reviews were wonderful." "That tenor has such a glorious voice!" "He hit the top C with such..." "And the low notes were beautiful too." "You're right, Mr Schneider!" "The mad scene was sensational." "Yes, and when she collapsed..." "Don't waste your time." "You didn't go to the opera!" " Madam, but I did." " You did not." "Mr Makáts, we didn't go to the opera." "Mr Schneider, whatever happens, I did go to the opera." " Really?" " Really." " Here." "May I?" "Good!" "Ha-ha." "The councillor says he accepts our invitation." "You see!" "That's why I wasn't at the opera last night!" "Very good." ""I am delighted to accept your kind invitation." "Yours, Makáts"" "We were happy to accept the invitation that brought us to the most prominent exponent of international delirium." "Erm... delivery..." "To the home of dear Mr Mátyás Schneider and his charming wife." "Hear!" "Hear!" "Transporting furniture, works of art, meat and fish, game and poultry," " fruit and greens." " Cabbage!" "Very good, ha-ha-ha!" "Turkish coffee..." "Yes, coffee." "So, transporting coffee, ice-cream and cheese." "He delivers a thousand and one delicious delights to feed the hungry and he is aided in his efforts" " by his charming daughter." " Hear!" "Hear!" "Ladies and gentlemen!" "What a wonderful and varied life he leads." "I am delighted to be linked to this excellent man and his family in such close... family contact." "Yes, family contact." "Hear that?" "Contract!" "The rubbish business is ours." "Mátyás Schneider, sir, I propose a toast..." "Very good!" "Ha, ha!" "I lift my glass to salute the charming Schneider family!" "Hear!" "Hear!" "What do you think of my uncle?" "Isn't he a nice man?" "Charming!" "The Makáts men are all gentlemen." "Yes..." "But you are so nice, Terka." "Much nicer than we are." "Really?" "And ever since I fell in love with you," "I have been all in a spin." "Sorry, gentlemen, but come collecting at a later date." "Do you hear?" "!" "What kind of collecting?" "We only donate to charity on Wednesdays..." "Just who do you think we are?" "I thought you came from a charity of some sort..." "Charity?" "Beethoven, Beethoven, did you hear that?" "We are serious musicians!" "Tell your employer we are here." "Have you tried to call the Schneider villa?" "Mr Schneider is having a party." "Mr Schneider is giving a party?" "And he leaves me waiting here." "Just one minute!" "Crooked." "Tóbiás!" "In baby clothes..." "Don't laugh, Julcsa!" "Look!" "Oh, I look so ugly!" "Hello, boys!" "Why don't you come in?" "I'm sorry, sir, but their dress..." "They look so smart." "Especially this one." "We did our best." "It's my graduation suit." " Are you taking the gentlemen into the drawing room?" " Of course!" "But, no... of course not..." "I know a much better place upstairs." "Come on..." "Here we are." "It's lovely." "Beautiful." " This is better..." " Make yourselves comfortable." " I'll send up food and drink." " Good." "I second that." "Boys!" "Let's play a joke." "When the clock strikes one," "you all come down the stairs..." "And the five of you sing that quartet." "I'll pretend to be stupid..." "And I'll say:" "Stop that!" "There's no engagement here." " But don't stop..." " We'll sing the quartet." "Sing the quartet." "It'll be a good joke." " I'll go down and send food up..." "and drink." " Good... good..." "Don't forget the wine!" " Beer too." " Of course." " Beer!" " And cigars!" "Where have you been, Mátyás?" "What do you say to the good news?" "This kind gentleman has just asked for Terka's hand on Makáts's behalf." " I have already consented." " Of course..." " And Terka?" " Oh, Terka?" "She'll happily say..." "No, no, dear Makáts..." "Dancing is one thing..." "but getting married?" " Your boss?" " Mr Schneider is busy with guests." "You can say anything." "Will you call out your employer or will I go in?" "There is no way you can go in, miss!" " Then call him out!" " No." " Then I'll go in." " Please, no!" " Will you call him?" "!" " No!" "It would be good, Papa, if you announce the engagement right away." "Isn't that too soon?" "The young couple..." "No, not at all!" "My apologies but duty calls." "Papa, you discuss the details with this nice man." "Please!" " We are forming family contact..." " Yes, the contract is important." " The rubbish collection..." " No problem." "So family contact with your puritan" " and highly moral household." " True, true." "We think morals are important" " because good morals..." " Hello, sunshine!" " Who is this charming lady?" " I don't know her." "Hello, Makáts, darling!" "How are we?" "Good, very good..." "It seems I do know her." "You know her?" "She's a lady of the world." " Yes." "Half..." " What?" "I sort of half know her." "Good." "He-he-he!" " You're a fool." "Sort of half." " What?" " You here?" " You didn't come to the bar." "There's no bar here." "This is a family house." "Why didn't we meet here?" "My wife would have been delighted..." " What do you want?" " I want to bring life to this sad scene." "We've got enough life." "We don't need yours." " Come on, introduce me to the boys." " What boys?" "I can't see any." "They're all boys at heart, sunshine." "Nice to see you." " Leave!" "Leave!" " No!" " Go!" "Get out!" " I'm not!" " No?" "!" " Don't touch me or I'll scream!" "Go or I'll eat you!" "Leave!" "Do you want a scandal?" "Bravo, bravo, wonderful!" "It's no wonder that guests are left waiting for the host you naughty thing!" "Matyi, introduce me to this gentleman!" " Councillor Makáts." " Councillor darling." "I didn't know you had such sweet friends." "I didn't know you had such a sweet niece." " Me neither." " No?" "Please make friends." "May I offer my arm?" "I would be happy to introduce you to the lady of the house." "Hyppolit!" "Hyppolit!" "Sir?" "Nowwhat?" "There'll be a scandal, sir." "You say this so lightly?" "I served the count for 27 years." "Tell me, Hyppolit..." "What would the count do at a time like this?" "The count would do nothing!" "And what happened to the woman?" "The woman flew." "His secretary would normally organise it." "But I haven't got a secretary." "A friend or an employee could organise it." "Employee!" "Thank you, Hyppolit, thank you!" "Madam, look at the dear niece I have with me." "Delighted, I'm sure!" "Take a seat if you please." "Why so formal, madam?" "Oh, please forgive me..." "I was confused in all the commotion." "Do sit down." " A delightful creature!" " Oh, yes." "Hello, Benedek?" "Come quickly, for God's sake!" "If my wife realises who that woman is..." "Yes." "Come in a suit, or a dinnerjacket, or a coat..." "You can wear a swimming costume for all I care but get here soon!" "The mistress wants to see you now." "Tell me, Hyppolit..." "Do you knowwhere my passport is?" "Papa, do you see that woman?" "Mama!" "I swear I have never met her before in my life." "Then introduce yourself now!" " Why?" " Well, you are the host!" "Yes, I am the host..." "But look, Mama!" "No "Mama"!" "Do you know she is the councillors niece?" " Oh, heaven's!" " What's wrong?" "Oh... you know..." "I forget who is who in such a big crowd." "Come and entertain the guests." "Oh, it'll be very entertaining." "Let's rehearse then." " You first!" " After you!" "Are you mad?" "What's the whistle for?" "So he knows where to start..." "Dear fellow singer and friend!" "No good!" " Dear friend and fellow singer!" " That's better." "At this festive hour, surrounded by family and friends..." "Stop it!" "He'll only interrupt you!" "And now for the joke." "That niece is sitting very close to Makáts." "Must be a close relative." " I don't like it!" " Me neither." "But I have organised another suitor." " He'll get rid of Makáts." " Who?" "What's the problem, Hyppolit?" "There appear to be a few technical problems, sir." " How do you mean?" " Mr Schneider is waiting for you." " The driver was sacked yesterday." " Sacked?" "But he's there!" " Were?" " There." "In a suit." " You're here?" " Welcome, Benedek!" "It was good of you to come." "I have a pretty partner for you." "Come with me!" "We have to discuss a delivery..." "I mean a removal." " Mama, what is Benedek doing here?" " Papa invited him." "Papa?" "How come?" " The councillors niece is very interested in him." " Really?" "They are old friends." "If you do that, you can have whatever you want." "I'll take you at your word." "Can I relax?" "I'll dance with her and see what I can do." "What a lovely couple!" "Your cousin appears to be enjoying herself." "My cousin?" "Where?" "The young lady with the red hair, dancing with Benedek." "She's my cousin?" "Very good." "Ha-ha!" "I suppose Mr Schneider told you that." "Schneider can say what he likes but I still do as I please." " How do you like it here?" " Much more now." "Do you knowwhat?" "Let's slip away quietly." "With you?" "Why?" "Where to?" "Somewhere we can be alone." "Good!" "I'll leave now and wait for you in the car." " Follow me!" " Right." "Makáts, bring me a drink." "Drink?" "My pleasure!" "If you're not his niece then who invited you?" "No one invited me, I just came." "I know the host." " Papa?" " Papa?" "I met your father..." " at a concert." " Interesting." "But I'm leaving." "A gentleman said he'd take me home." " Your dance partner?" " Yes." "Pretty, isn't he?" "He's taking me home." "Really?" "Listen here..." "Very good!" "Very good!" "Oh yes, very good!" "I'm going to marry you." "I'm only going to marry you." "Ha-ha." " Only me?" " Only you." " Good!" "Let's drink to that." " Drink, sweetheart, drink!" "You can drink, can't you?" "Stop!" " This way, this way." " Thank you, so kind." "Sir, if you will excuse me, the room appears to be taken!" "What?" " I saw Mr Makáts go in." " And then?" "I am afraid he is not alone." "I see." "The young couple." " Let's not disturb them." " I think we should." "I'm going to marry you." " Only me?" " I'm going to marry you." "Oh, the young couple." "How sweet they are." "Mr Schneider, let me introduce my fiancé." " Your name?" " Mimi!" "Erm, erm... erm..." "What about the contract?" " I'm not the least bit interested." " The nerve!" "Please leave our respectable house!" "Respectable house?" "!" "Your husband invites me here and your daughter runs offwith a chauffeur before the engagement." "Nice little house, I have to say!" "Don't get agitated!" "Cheerio!" "Cheerio, sweetheart, cheerio." "I want to get married!" "I want to get married!" "Get off me, you fool." "Off to bed with you!" "Good night, everybody!" "Is this the house famed for its moral standards?" "I find myself faced with a new situation." "I am outraged!" "Madam!" "Sir!" "Good evening to you both!" "Who's to blame?" " Me?" " Quiet!" "Do I have to wear a suit to eat bread?" "Quiet!" "And who was to blame for the diet?" "Quiet!" " Who landed me with that dancer?" " Me, perhaps?" "We're not talking about that." "Who is to blame for your daughter running offwith a chauffeur?" "Hyppolit is to blame for everything." " But, Papa!" " But I'll show him." " I'll show him who I am!" " Papa!" "Hyppolit!" " Where are the guests?" " They left." " Why?" " Why?" "Hyppolit!" " Where is Hyppolit?" " I can't find him." " Bring him here and I'll kill him!" " Then I'll find him." "I would like a private word with you, Mr Schneider!" "Yes." "After the scandalous events of this evening with the dancer," "I am forced to take the consequences and resign." "We have arrived, Miss Mimi." "Shocked, aren't you?" "Terribly!" "In fact, I'm stunned." "You wanted to take your girlfriend home." "That's true." "But now I've ruined your plans." "If you like." "Take me home at once!" "Here. 34 Elizabeth Street." "The Schneider villa." "Please get out." "I'm leaving." " I'll take the cases." " The cases stay!" "That's bad!" "You're leaving now?" "No, no, no." "You're staying and working out your notice." "And every day you will have to watch me eat my supper not in a suit but in my shirt sleeves." "Like this!" "And I'll eat onions with my goose." "With everything." "I'll eat onions with onions." "And I'll eat fish with a knife." "Two knives." "My wife will eat as much as she likes." "She'll be this fat." "And I'll grow my moustache back." "It'll be this big." "What's going on?" "My dear friend and musical companion!" "At this festive hour, surrounded by friends and family..." "Forget that rubbish!" "Dear friends." "On the engagement of your dear daughter..." "What engagement?" "We know." "We know." "Just start!" "Watch out!" "Watch out!" "One, two..." "Three cheers forthe happy pair..." "Stop!" "You're mistaken." "There's to be no engagement!" "What's going on here?" "Don't joke, sir." "Here are the happy couple." "You can leave because there is no engagement." "Or am I wrong?" "You're even interfering in this?" "!" "I don't care if you go pop, this is the happy couple." "You see!" "Ready!" "One, two..." "Three cheers forthe happy pair, like turtle doves in the air..." "The End"