"Choose life." "Choose a job." "Choose a career, a family." "Choose a fucking big TV." "Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players." "Choose good health." "Low cholesterol and dental insurance." "Choose mortgage repayments." "Choose a home." "Choose your friends!" "Choose leisurewear and matching luggage." "Choose a three-piece suite on hire purchase!" "Wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning." "Choose watching mind-numbing, spirit-crushing game shows." "Stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth." "'Choose rotting away at the end, 'in a miserable home, 'nothing more than an embarrassment 'to the brats you've spawned." "'Choose your future." "'Choose life.'" "But why would I want to do a thing like that?" "I chose not to choose life." "I chose something else." "And the reasons?" "There are no reasons." "Who needs reasons when you've got heroin?" "Goldfinger's better than Dr No." "Both of them are a lot better than Diamonds Are Forever." "A judgement reflected in its relatively poor showing at the box office." "In which field, of course," "Thunderball was a notable success." "'People think it's all about misery 'and desperation and death and all that shite, 'which is not to be ignored.'" "Fuck off!" "Jealous cunt!" "'But what they forget... 'is the pleasure of it.'" "All dead!" "White meat!" "You prick!" "'Otherwise, we wouldn't do it.'" " You want me to do it?" " Yes." "Pure as driven snow, that shit." "'After all, we're not fucking stupid." "'Or at least, we're not that fucking stupid.'" "'Take the best orgasm you ever had." "'Multiply it by a thousand 'and you're still nowhere near it.'" "Oh, it beats any meat injection!" "That beats any fucking cock in the world!" "'When you're on junk, you've only one worry - scoring." "'When you're off it, you worry about all sorts of shite." "'No money, can't get pissed." "'Can't get a bird." "Got a bird, too much hassle." "'You worry about bills, food, 'some football team that never wins." "'About human relationships 'and things that don't matter 'when you have a sincere, truthful junk habit.'" "I'd say in those days he was a muscular actor." "With all the presence of someone like Cooper or Lancaster combined with a sly wit... to make him a formidable lead." "And closer in that respect to Cary Grant." "'The principal drawback is you have to endure cunts saying...'" "No way would I poison my body with that shite." "All they fucking chemicals?" "No fucking way!" "It's a waste of your life." "Poisoning your body with that shite." "Every chance you've had, son, you've blown it." "Stuffing your veins with that filth!" "'From time to time, even I have uttered the magic words.'" "Never again, Swanney." "I'm off the skag." "Are you serious?" " No more." "I'm finished." " It's up to you." "I want off it for good." " I've heard it before." " The Sick Boy method." " It really worked for him." " Well, he lacks moral fibre." " He's a Sean Connery expert." " That's hardly a substitute." " You'll need one more hit." " I don't think so." "For the long night ahead." "'We called him Mother Superior 'on account of the length of his habit." "'Of course I'd have another shot." "I had work to do.'" "Relinquishing junk, stage one - preparation." "For this you will need:" "a room which you won't leave, soothing music." "Tomato soup, ten tins of;" "mushroom soup, eight tins of - for consumption cold." "Ice-cream - vanilla, one large tub of." "Magnesia, Milk of - one bottle." "Paracetamol, mouthwash, vitamins," "Mineral water," "Lucozade, pornography." "One mattress." "Buckets for urine, faeces and vomitus." "One television and one bottle of valium procured from my mother who is, in her own domestic and socially acceptable way, also a drug addict." "Now I'm ready." "I just need one final hit to soothe the pain till the valium takes effect." "Mikey?" "Yeah, it's Mark Renton." "I wondered, could you help me out?" "'This was typical of Mikey Forrester.'" "What the fuck are these?" "'Normally, I have nothing to do with him 'but things were not normal.'" "Opium suppositories!" "Ideal for your purposes." "Slow release." "Bring you down gradually." "Custom fucking designed for your needs." "I want a fucking hit!" "It's all I've got, mate." "Take it or leave it." "Feelin' better now?" "I might as well have stuck them up my arse." "Heroin makes you constipated." "The heroin from my last hit is fading away and the suppositories have yet to melt." "I'm no longer constipated." "I fantasize about a massive, pristine convenience." "Brilliant gold taps, virginal white marble, a seat carved from ebony, a cistern full of Chanel No.5, a flunky handing me pieces of silk toilet roll." "But under the circumstances," "I'll settle for anywhere." "The worst toilet in Scotland" "Yes, ya fucking dancer!" "And now..." "Now I'm ready." "The downside of coming off junk was mixing with my friends again in a state of full consciousness." "They were so like me, I could hardly bear to look at them." "Sick Boy came off junk too, just to show me how easily he could do it." "When all I wanted to do was feel sorry for myself, he insisted on telling me his theory of life." "Certainly a phenomenon in all walks of life." "What d'you mean?" "Well, at one point you've got it, then you lose it." "Then it's gone forever." "All walks of life." "Georgie Best, for example, had it" " lost it." "Or David Bowie or Lou Reed." "His solo stuff's not bad." "No." "But it's not great either." "And in your heart you know that although it sounds all right, it's actually just...shite." "So who else?" "Charlie Nicholas, David Niven, Malcolm McLaren," " Elvis Presley..." " OK, OK." "What's the point you're making?" "All I'm trying to do, Mark, is to help you understand that The Name Of The Rose is merely a blip on an otherwise uninterrupted downward trajectory." "What about The Untouchables?" "I don't rate that at all." "Despite the Academy Award?" "That means fuck all." "It's a sympathy vote." "So we all get old, we cannae hack it any more and that's it?" "Yeah." "That's your theory?" "Yeah." "Beautifully fucking illustrated." "Give me the gun." "Give me the gun." "Have you got the beast in your sights?" "Clear enough, Miss Moneypenny." "This should present no significant problems." "For a vegetarian, Rents, you're a fucking evil shot!" "'Without heroin, 'l led a useful and fulfilling life as a good citizen.'" " Good luck, Spud." " Cheers, Cat-boy." "If they think you're no tryin', you're doomed." "They'll be on to the DSS and your giro's fucking finished, right?" " Right." " But try too hard..." " You might get the job!" " Exactly." " Nightmare!" " It's a tightrope, Spud." "A fucking tightrope!" "I get pure shy with the interviewer cats." "I can't answer the questions." "I get nerves, like footballers on big occasions." "Try some of this." "Some speed - just the ticket, man." "Naw, I went to Craigie - Craignewton." "I put Royal Edinburgh College to help get the job." "There's too much discrimination here." "They're both schools, right." "I put across the idea." "People get hung up on details." "Like how many O-grades I got." "Maybe six." "Maybe none." "It's not important." "What's important is that I am." "Do you mean you lied on your application?" "No..." "Well, yes." "To get my foot in the door." "Showing initiative." "You were referred by the Department of Employment." "Your foot was in the door." "Yeah, cool." "Whatever you say, man." "Sorry." "You're the man." "The dude in the chair." "I am merely here." "Obviously." "What exactly attracts you to the leisure industry?" "In a word, pleasure." "Like, my pleasure in other people's leisure." "Do you see yourself as having any weaknesses?" "Oh, yes!" "I'm a bit of a perfectionist." "For me, it's the best or nothin' at all." "Things get dodgy - I cannot be bothered." "But I'm getting good vibes about this interview." "Seems to me it's going pretty well, eh?" "Thank you, Mr Murphy." "We'll let you know." "The pleasure was mine." "'Spud had done well." "'He made me proud." "Fucked up good and proper.'" "Picture the scene." "The other fucking week there, down the Volley with Tommy playing pool." "I'm playing like Paul Newman, giving the boy a tanning." "It comes to the last shot, the deciding ball of the tournament." "I'm on the black, he looks biscuit-arsed." "When this hard cunt comes in." "Obviously fucking fancied himself, like." "Starts staring at me." "Looking right fucking at me as if to say, "Come ahead."" "You ken me." "I'm not the type that goes looking for bother but I had a pool cue and he'd get it in his puss!" "So I squares up, casual like." "What does the hard cunt do?" "The so-called hard cunt?" "Shites it!" "Puts down his drink and gets the fuck out of there." "And after that..." "well, the game was mine." "'And that was it." "'That was Begbie's story." "'Or Begbie's version of the story." "'Later, I got the truth from Tommy." "'You always got the truth from Tommy." "'He never lied, never took drugs, 'never cheated on anyone.'" "It was Wednesday morning." "We were in the Volley, playing pool." "That's true." "But Begbie is playing absolutely fucking gash." "His hangover's so bad, he can hardly hold the fucking cue!" "I'm doing my best to lose, trying to humour him." "But every time I touch a ball, I pot something." "Every time Begbie goes near the table, he fucks it up." "Fuck's sake...!" "So, he's got the hump." "But I set him up to pot the black, win one game, salvage his pride and not kick me in." "So, he's on the black..." "'Pressure shot... 'which goes wrong, big time.'" "'He picks on this wee gadge, 'accusing him of putting him off." "'He hadn't even glanced at us.'" " Fuck off!" " 'He'd have chibbed him.'" "Then I thought he was gonna do me." "The beggar's fucking psycho." "But he's a mate." " What can you do?" " Can I borrow this?" "'What indeed could one do?" "'Try not to get involved.'" "'Begbie didn't do drugs." "He did people." "'He got off on it." "His own sensory addiction.'" "Nobody move!" "The lassie got glassed." "No cunt moves till we know who did it." "Who the fuck are you?" "Yes!" "'As I sat watching 'the highly personal video 'stolen only hours earlier from one of my best friends, 'l realised that something was missing from my life.'" "How's it going with Gail?" "No joy yet." "How long is it?" "Six weeks." "Six weeks!" "Nightmare right." "She told me she didn't want our relationship to start out on a physical basis as that is how it principally is going to be defined from then on." "When did she come up with that?" "She read it in Cosmopolitan." "Six weeks and no sex?" "I've got balls like fucking watermelons I'm telling you." " I read it in Cosmopolitan." " Interesting theory." "Actually, it's a nightmare." "I'm desperate for a shag but watching him suffer was just too much fun." "Try it wi' Tommy." "It's the only pleasure I get from him!" " You know about my birthday?" " No." "He forgot." "Useless motherfucker!" "Useless motherfucker;" "that's what she called me." "I said to her, look I'm sorry but these things happen, let's put it behind us." "That's fair enough." "Yes, but then she finds out I've got a ticket for Iggy Pop the same night." "Was she upset?" "Very, "It's me or Iggy Pop, time to decide."" "So what are you going to do?" "Well I've paid for the ticket." "What are you two talking about?" "Football." "What are you talking about?" "Shopping." "'The situation was becoming serious." "'Renton noticed the haste with which 'the successful in the sexual sphere, 'as in all others, segregated themselves from the failures.'" "'Heroin had robbed Renton of his sex drive 'but now it returned with a vengeance." "'The impotence of those days faded 'and desperation took a hold on his sex-crazed mind." "'Post-junk libido, fuelled by alcohol and amphetamine 'taunted him with his own unsatisfied desire." "'Dot, dot, dot.'" "'And with that," "'Mark Renton had fallen in love.'" "Excuse me." "I don't mean to harrass you but I was very impressed with the way you dealt with that situation." " I think you're special." " Thanks." " Your name?" " Diane." "Where are you going?" " Home." " Where's that?" "It's where I live." " Great." " What?" "I'll come back with you but I'm not promising anything." "Does this approach usually work?" "Or have you never tried it before?" "You don't normally approach girls, right?" "You're a quiet, sensitive type but if I'm prepared to take a chance," "I'll get to know the inner you." "Witty, adventurous, passionate, loving, loyal..." "Taxi!" "A little bit crazy, a little bit bad." "But hey, don't us girls just love that(!" ")" "Well?" "What's wrong, boy?" "Cat got your tongue?" "I left something..." "Are you getting in?" "Do you understand?" "You will be a considerate and thoughtful lover." "Generous...but firm." "Failure on your part to live up to these very reasonable expectations will result in swift resumption of a non-sex situation." "Right?" "What?" "Shut up!" "Wake up, Spud." "Wake up." "Sex!" "Casual sex!" "Tommy, put the tape on." "What?" "I wanna watch ourselves while we're screwing." "So let's see what I'm missing." "Not much!" "'The captain, Archie Gemmill, 'picking it up from the outside..." "'He's going all the way..." "and he scores!" "'Oh, what a magnificent goal!" "'Gemmill at his very best." "'What a penetrating goal that was.'" "I haven't felt that good since Archie Gemmill scored against Holland in 1978." "Right." "You can't sleep here." " What?" " Out!" "Come on!" "You can sleep on the hall sofa or go home." "And don't make any noise." "Jesus!" "Gone?" " Where has it gone?" " It'll be here somewhere!" "I might've returned it by mistake." "Returned it?" "!" "Where?" "The video shop, Tommy?" "The fucking video shop?" "!" "So every punter in Edinburgh's jerking off to our video?" "Oh, God, Tommy, I feel sick!" " Hi." " Hello." "Fuck!" "Come in and sit down." "Like some coffee?" "Aye." "You must be Mark." "Aye, that's me." "Are you a friend of Diane's?" " More a friend of a friend." " Right." "Are you her flatmates, like?" "Flatmates?" "!" "I must remember that one." "Morning." "Good morning, Spud." "Morning, Gail." "Mr Houston." "Mrs Houston." "Mornin', Spud." "Sit down and have some breakfast." "I'm sorry about last night, by the way." "That's OK." "I slept fine on the sofa." "I had a bit much to drink." "Had a bit of an accident." "Dinnae worry." "Does a man good to cut loose once in a while." "This one could do with being tied up." "I'll get the sheets washed." "I'll wash them." "No need." " It's no problem." " Or for me." " I'd rather take care of it." " Really..." " No!" " Spud, they're my sheets!" " Why not?" " Because it's illegal." "What, holding hands?" " No, not holding hands." " You were quite happy" " to do a lot more last night." " That's what's illegal!" "Inside, they'd cut my balls off." " You're not going to jail." " Easy for you to say." " Can I see you again?" " Certainly not!" "If you don't see me again, I'll tell the police." "I'll see you around." "Now what?" "We're going for a walk." "A walk!" " Where?" " There!" "Are you serious?" "Well, what are you waitin' for?" "Tommy... this is not natural, man." "It's the great outdoors!" "Fresh air!" "We know Lizzy's giving you a hard time." "Don't take it out on us." "Makes you proud to be Scottish." "It's shite being Scottish!" "We're the lowest of the low." "The scum of the fuckin' earth!" "The most wretched, miserable, servile pathetic trash that was ever shat into civilisation!" "Some hate the English." "I don't - they're just wankers." "We, on the other hand, are colonised by wankers." "Can't even find a decent culture to be colonised by." "We're ruled by effete arseholes!" "It's a shite state of affairs." "All the fresh air in the world won't make a fucking difference!" "Sorry, man." "It's no' like..." "No, I appreciate it, Tommy." "'Around this time," "'Spud, Sick Boy and I 'made a healthy, informed, democratic decision 'to get back on heroin as soon as possible." "'Took about twelve hours.'" "Paul Newman, right, he were doing the world a favour..." "'Looks easy, this." "It's not." "'Looks like a doss, a soft option." "'But living like this is a full-time business.'" "Ursula Andress." "The quintessential Bond girl - that's what everyone says." "The embodiment, right, of his superiority to us." "Beautiful... exotic... highly sexual yet...totally unavailable to anyone apart from him." "Shite!" "Let's face it, she'd shag one punter from Edinburgh, she'd shag the whole fucking lot of us!" "I knew he was gonna do that." "Lizzy's gone, Mark." "She's gone and fucking dumped me." "It was that video tape." "And that Iggy Pop business and other shite." "She told me where to go and no mistake." "I said to her," ""Is there any chance of getting back together?"" "No way." "No fucking way." "Honor Blackman, aka Pussy Galore." "Right?" "What a total fucking misnomer!" "I wouldnae touch her with yours!" "I want to try it." "You're always going on about how it's the ultimate hit." "Better than sex." "Come on, man, I'm a fucking adult." "I can find out for myself." "I've got the money." "Personality." "I mean, that's what counts, right?" "Personality." "That's what keeps a relationship going through the years." "Like heroin." "I mean, heroin's got great fucking personality." "'Swanney taught us 'to adore and respect the National Health Service." "'lt was the source of much of our gear." "'We stole drugs." "'We stole prescriptions, 'bought them, sold them, forged or photocopied them." "'Or traded drugs with cancer victims, alcoholics, 'old-aged pensioners, AIDS patients, 'epileptics and bored housewives." "'We took morphine, diamorphine, 'cyclozine, codeine, temazepam, 'nitrazepam, phenobarbitone, 'sodium amytal, dextropropoxyphene, methadone," "'Nalbuphine, pethidine, pentazocine, 'buprenorphine, 'dextromoramide, chlormethiazole." "'The streets are awash with drugs 'you can have for unhappiness and pain." "'And we took them all." "'We would've injected Vitamin C 'if they'd made it illegal!" "'" "The First Day of the Edinburgh Festival" "May I use your bathroom?" "Thank you." "Now Rent-boy, no fucking skag." "'But the good times couldn't last forever.'" "Oh, my God, no!" "Please!" "'l think Allison had been screaming all day 'but it hadn't really registered before." "'She might have been screaming for a week." "'lt was days since I'd heard anyone speak." "'Though surely someone must have said something 'in all that time.'" "Allison?" "Allison!" " Help me, please!" " Cool down!" "Everything's gonna be just fine." "'Nothing could've been further from the truth." "'ln fact, nothing was gonna be just fine." "'On the contrary, everything was gonna be bad." "'Everything was gonna be even worse than it already was.'" "Fuck!" "'lt wasn't my baby." "'She wasn't my baby." "'Baby Dawn - she wasn't mine." "'Spud's, Swanney's," "'Sick Boy's... 'l dunno." "'Maybe Allison knew." "Maybe not." "'l wished I could think of something to say - 'something sympathetic, 'something human.'" "Say something, Mark." "Fucking say something!" "I'm cooking up." "Cook us up a shot, Rents." "I really need a hit." "'And so she did - 'l could understand that." "'To take the pain away." "'So I cooked up 'and she got a hit." "'But only after me - 'that went without saying." "'Well, we knew who the father was now." "'lt wasn't just the baby that died that day." "'Something inside Sick Boy was lost and never returned." "'He had no theory to explain this moment." "Nor did I." "'Our only response was to keep going and fuck everything." "'Pile misery on misery." "Heat it on a spoon 'and dissolve it." "'Then squirt it into a vein 'and do it all over again." "'Keep on going out, robbing, fucking people over." "'Propelling ourselves with longing 'towards the day it would all go wrong." "'Because no matter how much you stash or steal, 'you never have enough." "'No matter how often you go out and rob, 'you always need to do it all over again." "'Sooner or later, 'this kind of thing was bound to happen.'" "Shoplifting is theft, which is a crime, and there is no such entity as victimless crime." "Heroin addiction explains but doesn't excuse your actions." "Mr Murphy, you are a habitual thief, devoid of remorse." "I sentence you to six months' imprisonment." "I worry it will not be long till we meet again." "Mr Renton, you have entered a programme of rehabilitation in an attempt to wean yourself away from heroin." "The suspension of your sentence depends on your continued cooperation with this programme." "Stand guilty before me again and I won't hesitate to impose a custodial sentence." "Thank you, Your Honour." "With God's help, I'll conquer this terrible affliction." "'What can you say?" "'Begbie had a phrase for it.'" "It was obvious that cunt was gonna fuck some cunt." "Have you learnt your lesson?" "My son!" "I thought I was gonna lose you." "You're nothing but trouble but I still love you!" "Clean up your fucking act." " Cut that shite out." " Francis is talking sense." "Fucking right." "See, inside, you wouldn't last two days." "There's better things than the needle." "Choose life." "My wee baby." "# Oh, Mamma's little baby..." "# Loves shortening, shortening" "# Mamma's little baby loves shortening bread!" "I'm sorry, Mrs Murphy." "It wasn't fair, Spud going down and not me." "Well, it's no' our fault!" "Your boy went down because he was a smackhead." "If that's not your fault then I don't know what is." "I tried to get him off it." "I'll get the drinks in, eh?" "'Wish I'd gone down, not Spud." "'Here I was surrounded by my family 'and so-called mates 'and I've never felt so alone." "'Never in my puff." "'Since I was on remand, 'they've had me on this programme." "'The State-sponsored addiction." "'Three sickly-sweet doses of methadone a day 'instead of smack." "It's never enough." "'Right now, it's nowhere near enough." "'l took all three earlier." "'18 hours to my next shot 'and the sweat on my back's like a layer of frost." "'l need to visit the Mother Superior for one hit." "'One fucking hit 'to get us over this long, hard day.'" "What's on the menu this evening, sir?" " Your favourite dish." " Excellent." " Usual table, sir?" " Why, thank you." "Would sir care to pay for his bill in advance?" "No, stick it on my tab." "Credit limit was reached and breached some time ago." "Well, in that case..." "Ah, hard currency." "That'll do nicely." "Can't be too careful when dealing with your type, sir." "Would sir care for a starter?" " Some garlic bread?" " No, thanks." "I'll proceed directly to the intravenous injection of hard drugs." "As you wish, sir." "As you wish." "Perhaps sir would like me to call for a taxi?" "Open your eyes!" "Wake up!" "Come on, wake up!" "'l don't feel the sickness yet 'but it's in the post, that's for sure." "'l'm in the junkie limbo at the moment." "'Too ill to sleep... 'too tired to stay awake.'" "'But the sickness is on its way." "'Sweat, chills, nausea, 'pain and craving." "'Need like nothing else I've ever known 'will soon take hold of me." "'lt's on its way." "# Ooh, you've got green eyes" "# Ooh, you've got blue eyes" "# Ooh, you've got grey eyes" "# And I've never seen anyone" "# Quite like you before" "# No, I've never met anyone" "# Quite like you before" "We'll help you, son." "You stay here till you get better." "We'll beat this together." " I should go to the clinic." " No." "No clinics." "No methadone." "It made you worse." "You said so yourself." "You lied to us, son." "Your own mother and father!" "You can bring some jellies..." "No!" "You're worse coming off that than you are with the heroin." "A clean break this time." "We'll keep an eye on you." "I appreciate what you're trying to do but just bring me one more hit, plea..." "I need one more fucking hit!" "You fuck!" "Fuck it!" "Fuck it!" "Well... this is a good fucking laugh, isn't it?" "You sweat that shite out your system." "If I come back and it's still here," "I'll fucking kick it out." "OK?" "God!" "Question number one." "The human immunodeficiency virus is a...?" "Retrovirus." "Retrovirus is the right answer!" "It's a mug's game, Mrs Renton." "I mean, I'm not saying I was blameless myself." "The time comes when you have to turn your back on that nonsense and just say no." "Just say no." "It's Dawn!" "She's dead!" "Not baby Dawn." "Question number two." "HIV binds to which receptor on the host lymphocyte?" "Which receptor is that?" "CD4." "CD4 is the right answer!" "Better than sex, Rents?" "Better than sex?" "The ultimate hit." "I'm a fucking adult," "I can find out for myself." "Well, I'm finding out, all right!" "Tommy!" "Stop it." "Just fucking stop." "Stop it." "Is he guilty... or not guilty?" "Mummy!" "He's our son." "Stop looking at me!" "Stop!" "Mark!" "There's something you need to do." "Come alive, 35." "Box of tricks, 66." "Mark!" "Mark, you've got a house!" "House!" "House!" "For goodness sake, Mark." "'lt seems, however, 'l really am the luckiest guy in the world." "'Several years of addiction 'right in the middle of an epidemic, 'surrounded by the living dead." "'But not me." "I'm negative." "'lt's official." "'And once the pain goes, 'that's when the real battle starts." "'Depression, boredom - 'you're so low, you want to top yourself.'" "Tommy!" "Tommy, it's Mark, man." "All right, mate?" "Getting out much, Tommy?" "No." "Following the game at all?" "No." "Nah." "Me neither, really." "Did you take the test?" "Aye." "Clear?" "Aye." "That's nice." "I'm sorry, Tommy." "You got any gear on you?" "No." "I'm clean, man." "Well... sub us then, mate." "I'm expecting a rent cheque." "Thanks, Mark." "No bother." "'No bother." "'None at all." "'Not for me, anyway." "'Still, it's easy to be philosophical 'when it's some other poor cunt with shite for blood.'" " What do you want?" " Are you clean?" " Yes." " Is that a promise?" " It is, actually!" " I'm only asking." "Is that hash I can smell?" " No." " I wouldn't mind some." " It isn't." " It smells like it." " You're too young." " I'm too young for what?" "You're not getting any younger, Mark." "The world's changing, music's changing, even drugs are changing." "You can't stay in dreaming about heroin and Ziggy Pop." "It's Iggy Pop." "Whatever." "The guy's dead, anyway." "Iggy toured last year." "Tommy went to see him." "The point is, you've got to find something new." "'She was right." "I had to find something new." "'Only one thing for it.'" "Lifestyle Letting Agency." "A beautifully converted Victorian townhouse." "'ldeally located in a quiet road 'near to local shops." "'This one's two bedrooms and a kitchen/diner." "'Fully fitted." "Excellent decorative order." "'Lots of storage space, all mod cons." "'And it's going at..." "£320 a week." "'l settled in not too badly, 'kept myself to myself." "'Sometimes I thought about the guys 'but mainly, I didn't miss them." "'This was boom town 'where any fool could make cash from chaos.'" "I've got a beautifully converted Victorian townhouse." "'l enjoyed the sound of it - 'profit, loss, margins, 'takeovers, lending, letting, 'sub-letting, sub-dividing." "'Cheating, scamming, breaking away.'" "Who's got the keys to Talgarth Road?" "'lf society existed, I had nothing to do with it." "'For the first time, 'l was almost content.'" "'Dear Mark," "'Glad you found a job and somewhere to live." "'School's fine at the moment." "'l'm not pregnant - thanks for asking." "'Sick Boy wanted me to work for him." "'l told him where to go." "'Met Spud." "He sends his regards." "'l think that's what he said.'" "Tell Marky..." "Tell him..." "'No-one has seen Tommy for ages." "'And Francis Begbie has been on TV a lot." "'He's wanted by the police 'because of an armed robbery in a jeweller's." "'Take care." "Yours, with love, Diane.'" "'Francis Begbie...'" "Armed robbery?" "How could it be armed robbery with a fucking replica?" "A scandal." "And the gear." "Look." "Supposed to be solid silver - it's fucking garbage!" "There's young couples invest all their hopes in that stuff." " It's a scandal." " Fucking right." "Another one of the wee Pot Noodles?" "I'm fucking Lee Marvin!" "Hey, Rents." "'Begbie settled in in no time at all.'" "I've no fucking cigarettes." "Aye, right." "It's me." "Rents!" "'Yeah, the guy's a psycho." "'But it's true - 'he's a mate an' all so what can you do?" "'" "Nip down the bookies and put a line on for us." "Can you no' go yourself?" "Seeing as I'm a fugitive from the law and I cannae walk the fucking streets, you go." "Here." "Doncaster." "Four forty." "Five pound to win" " Bad Boy." "Fucking..." "Bring some fucking beer an' all." "Come on, Bad Boy." "Come on, son." "Come on, son." "Bad Boy!" "'Came in at 16 to one." "'And with the winnings," "'Diane was right - 'the world is changing." "'Music is changing, 'drugs are changing." "Men and women are changing." "'One thousand years from now, 'there'll be no guys or girls, just wankers." "'Sounds great to me." "'lt's just a pity no-one told Begbie.'" "Fuck!" "Fuck!" "'We're heterosexual by default, not by decision." "'lt's just a question of who you fancy." "'lt's all about aesthetics and fuck all to do with morality.'" "Fuck!" "'But you try telling Begbie that.'" "I'm not a fucking buftie!" "It could have been wonderful." "Fucking listen to me, piece of junkie shit!" "You mention that again and I'll cut you up." "You understand?" "'Since I last saw him," "'Sick Boy had reinvented himself 'as a pimp and a pusher." "'And was here, he said, to mix business and pleasure." "'Setting up contacts 'for the great skag deal 'that was one day gonna make him rich.'" "Good chips." "I can't believe you did that." "I got a good price for it." " I need the money." " It was my fucking telly!" "If I'd known you'd get so humpty about it," "I wouldn't have bothered." "Fucking rented, anyway." "You gonna eat that?" "Have you got a passport?" "Why?" "I met this bloke." "Runs a hotel..." "Brothel." "Loads of contacts." "Does a nice side-line in punting British passports to foreigners." "Get you a good price." "And why would I want to sell my passport?" "It was just an idea." "'l had to get rid of them." "'Sick Boy didn't do his drug deal and didn't get rich." "'He and Begbie hung around my bedsit looking to steal things." "'l decided to put them in the worst place in the world.'" "'But of course, they weren't paying any rent." "'So when my boss found two suckers who would," "'Sick Boy and Begbie were bound to feel threatened.'" "Lots of storage." "All mod cons." "320 quid a week." "'And that was that." "'But we had another reason to go back." "Tommy.'" "Tommy knew he had the virus but not that he'd gone full-blown." "Was it pneumonia or cancer?" "No - toxoplasmosis." "It's like a stroke." "How's that?" "He wanted to see Lizzy again." "She wouldn't let him near the house." "So he bought her a present." "This kitten." "Bet Lizzy told him where to fuckin' stick it." ""I don't want a cat," she says." "So there's Tommy stuck with this kitten." "You can imagine what happened." "To those gathered here today," "Thomas McKenzie filled a number of roles in our lives..." "The thing was neglected." "Pissing and shitting all over." "Tommy's lying about fucked out of his eyeballs on smack or downers." "He never knew you could get toxoplasmosis from cat shit." "He had a great lust for life." "Neither did I." "What is it?" "Fucking horrible." "It's like an abscess on your brain." "Fucking hell." "Then what happened?" "He starts getting headaches." "So he uses more smack, you know, for the pain, like." "And then he has a stroke." "A fucking stroke!" "Just like that." "Gets home from the hospital and dies three weeks later." "He'd been dead for ages before neighbours complained about the smell and got the police to break down the door." "Tommy was lying in a pool of vomit." "The kitten was fine." "All please rise for the committal." "# Did you think I would leave you crying" "# When there's room on my horse for two?" "# Climb up here, Tommy" "# Don't be dying" "# I can go just as fast with two" "# When we grow up" "# We'll both be soldiers" "# And our horses will not be toys" "# And I wonder if we'll remember" "# When we were two little boys" "Did you tell him yet?" " On you go." " What?" "Swanney's mate..." "You know him" " Mikey Forrester." "Aye." "He's come into some gear." " A lot of gear." " How much gear?" "About two kilos." "So he tells me." "He got drunk in a pub by the docks last week." "Met two Russian sailors." "They're fucking carrying the stuff." "For sale there and then, like." "He wakes up next morning, realises what he's done, gets very nervous." "He wants rid of this." "So?" "So, he met me." "I offered to take it at a reasonable price so I could punt it on to a guy in London." "We're just back from Tommy's funeral and you're discussing a skag deal?" "Aye." "What was your price?" " Four grand." " You haven't got four grand." "We're 2,000 short." "Well, that's tough." "Mark, every cunt knows you've been saving up down in London." "I don't have two grand." "You fucking do." "I've seen your bank statement." "For fuck's sake!" "Two thousand, one hundred and thirty-three pound." "Two kilos." "What's that, ten years?" "Mikey Forrester, Russian sailors - what the fuck are you on?" "Spud, you've been to jail." "You want to go back?" "I just want the money." "Keep your mouths shut and no cunt goes to jail." "'There were a lot of possibilities 'running through my mind 'about what might happen in London." "'Things I didn't want to talk to anyone about." "'ldeas best kept to myself." "'What no-one told me was that when we bought the skag, 'some lucky punter would have to try it out." "'Begbie didn't trust Spud 'and Sick Boy was too careful these days." "'So I rolled up my sleeve, 'l spiked my vein 'and I did what had to be done.'" "It's good." "Oh, it's really fucking good!" "'That hit was good." "'l promised myself another before I got to London." "'Just one, for old time's sake." "'Just to piss Begbie off." "'This was his nightmare." "'The dodgiest scam in a life of dodgy scams." "'Being perpetrated with three of the most useless 'and unreliable fuck-ups in town." "'l knew what was going on in his mind - 'any trouble in London and he would dump us." "'lf he got caught with a bag of skag 'on top of that armed robbery, he'd go down for 15 to 20." "'Begbie was hard but not so hard 'that he didn't shite it off 20 years in Saughton." "'This was to be my final hit." "'But let's be clear - 'there's final hits and final hits." "'What kind was this to be?" "'" "Did you bring the cards?" "What?" " I told you to mind the cards." " I've not brought them." "It's fucking boring without the cards." "I'm sorry." " Bit fucking late, like." " Why didn't you bring them?" "I told you to, doss cunt!" "Christ!" "These your friends, right?" "These are the guys I told you about." " Well, is he here?" " Yeah, he's here." "You didn't get followed or nothing?" "Didn't get followed." "OK." " All right?" " Hi." "'Straight away, 'he saw what we were." "'Small-time wasters with an accidental big deal.'" "Excuse me, gentlemen." "So... how much would you like for this?" "20,000." "I don't think it's worth much more than 15." "'He didn't need to negotiate." "'What would we do if he didn't buy it?" "'Sell it on the streets?" "Fuck that.'" "Well, 19." "I'm terribly sorry." "I can't go to 19." "Well, fucking 16 then." "OK." "Well, fucking 16 it is, then." "These, gentlemen, are £2,000 bundles." "That's two..." "That's four..." "'We settled on £16,000." "'He'd a lot more in his suitcase 'but it was better than nothing.'" "Thank you, gentlemen." "May I say it's been a pleasure haggling with you." "Fucking brand new." "'For a moment, 'it felt great." "'Like we were in it together, 'like it meant something." "'A moment like that can touch you 'but it doesn't last long." "Not like £16,000.'" "Spud, any investments planned?" "Gonna buy an island in the sun?" "For 4,000?" "One palm tree and a sewage outflow!" "I don't know, man." "I'm gonna get something for my ma." "And some good speed." "No bicarb." "Get a girl, take her out, treat her right..." "And shag her?" "No, man!" "True love." "True love." "But I could handle hot sex with a Jewish princess tonight!" "Ya daft cunt!" " Or a Catholic." " Don't waste it." "Get the drinks." "I got a round already." "I got the last one." "Your round, Franco." " OK." "Same again?" " I'm off for a piss." "See when I get back, that money's still here, OK?" "No, we're out the door." "I'll be after you." "You'll never catch us, flabby." "But when I get back..." "Be halfway down the street with the money." " I'd fucking kill you." " I thought you might." "Thought you might." "Are you game for it?" "What?" "Well?" "Are you serious?" "Don't know." "Don't know." "What d'you think?" " Still here, I see." " Oh, aye." " Wouldn't run out on a mate." " I would." "Where's Franco?" "For fuck's sake!" "Sorry." "I'll buy you another." "You ruined my fucking suit, you fucking idiot!" "I'm sorry." ""Sorry" won't dry me off, you cunt." "He says he's sorry." "Not sorry enough for being a fat cunt." "You can't even hold a pint." "Now fuck off!" "No, Franco, no..." "For fuck's sake!" "Fucking nice one, Franco(!" ")" " You cut me, man!" " You were in my way." "Anybody else wanna get in my fucking way?" "You?" "Hey, Rent-boy, bring me down a fucking smoke." "We'd better go." "To hospital." "You're not going to hospital." "Stay there." "You bring me down a fucking cigarette." "And the bag." "'Now I've justified this to myself 'in all sorts of ways." "'lt wasn't a big deal - 'just a minor betrayal." "'Or we'd outgrown each other, 'that sort of thing." "'But let's face it, I ripped them off - 'my so-called mates." "'But Begbie, I couldn't give a shit about him." "'And Sick Boy, he'd have done the same to me, 'if he'd only thought of it first." "'And Spud..." "Well, OK, I felt sorry for Spud." "'He never hurt anybody." "Bastard!" "Move away, everybody." "What's going on in there?" "Open up." "Open up now!" "'So why did I do it?" "'l could offer a million answers, all false." "'The truth is that I'm a bad person." "'But that's gonna change." "'l'm going to change." "This is the last of that." "'Now I'm cleaning up, going straight and choosing life." "'l'm looking forward to it." "'l'm gonna be just like you - 'the job, the family, the fucking big television, 'the washing machine, the car, the compact disc." "'Good health, low cholesterol, 'mortgage, starter home, leisure wear, luggage, 'three-piece suite, DIY." "'Game shows, junk food, children." "'Walks in the park, nine to five, 'good at golf, washing the car, choice of sweaters." "'Family Christmas, indexed pension, tax exemption." "'Clearing the gutters, getting by - 'looking ahead, the day you die.'"