"♪ There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation" "♪ And school comes along just to end it" "♪ So the annual problem for our generation" "♪ is finding a good way to spend it" "♪ Like maybe" "♪ Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy" "♪ or climbing up the Eiffel Tower" "♪ Discovering something that doesn't exist" "Hey!" "♪ Or giving a monkey a shower" "♪ Surfing tidal waves" "♪ Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain" "It's over here!" "♪ Finding a dodo bird Painting a continent" "♪ Or driving our sister insane" "Phineas!" "♪ As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do" "♪ before school starts this fall" "♪ So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all!" "Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!" "I think this might be the hottest day on record." "Wait..." "(SLURPS)" "Hi, guys." "Hey, Baljeet." "How was physics camp?" "Positively remedial." "How much more basic can you get than the surface tension of water droplets?" "Surfer tension?" "What's that?" "Surface tension is the property which allows molecules of water on its surface to form a sort of stretchy skin which allows it to retain its shape and durability at a small size." "Cool!" "Ferb, I know what we're gonna do today." "(WATCH ALARM BEEPS) Not me." "BALJEET:" "Really?" "What are you doing today?" "With the hurly-burly of my busy social calendar" "I often forget to have quality time with my pet goldfish, Biff." "So I shall smell you later." "(GATE CLOSES) Wow." ""Smell you later" sounds a lot more formal when you bow." "Well, Ferb, I know what the rest of us are gonna do today." "Speaking of pets, where's Perry?" "(WATCH BEEPS) MONOGRAM:" "Sorry I can't bethere,AgentP," "You'll be getting your mission today from Director Diphthong from Accounting." "Good luck." "(GAVEL BANGS) Uh, no, no." "No, Your Honor, I'm not speaking on a mobile device." "I'm, I'm talking to a wart on my hand." "Go away, wart!" "Go away!" "Hello, Agent P. It's me, Director Diphthong from Accounting." "Doctor Doofenshmirtz has been buying an exorbitant amount of negative ion generators and negative power cable and I'm positive that it can't be good." "Yeah." "Uh, so go find out what Doofenshmirtz is up to, and put a stop to it." "Descending Diphthong!" "It's my signature sign-off." "What do you think?" "Descending Diphthong!" "I'd stick with accounting." "CANDACE:" "Can you believe how hot it is today, Jeremy?" "Even my dollies are sweating!" "Not that I play with dolls," "I just happen to have a couple on my shelf next to my unicorn. (CHUCKLES)" "Cool." "So what do you want to do today?" "I don't know." "I thought maybe we could head to the mall." "I suppose we could go to the mall again." "(ECHOING) The mall again." "The mall again." "Really?" "The mall again?" "Wow, you are so predictable." "So ordinary!" "Predictable?" "Ordinary?" "I mean, come on, I play 20 instruments!" "Yeah, that all start with the letter B, as in boring." "♪ Tra-la-la-la..." "Who's that?" "Just pretend she's not there." "That's what I do." "JEREMY:" "Candace?" "Candace!" "Are you there?" "Uh, yeah." "Yeah, sorry." "Forget the mall." "I'm gonna think of something else to do that's really cool and totally different." "'Cause, you know, I got to be my unpredictable self." "So Candace is out." "Peace!" "Uh, you know what?" "That's so overused." "Candace is out." "♪ Tra-la-la-la-la!" "(KNOCK ON DOOR) Candace, I'm on my way to..." "You know, this feels awfully familiar." "I tell you I'm going out, later you'll tell me Phineas and Ferb are up to something, but there's nothing there to see, so we all have pie." "Just another ordinary day." "Ordinary?" "Do I ordinarily do this?" "(LAUGHING MADLY)" "♪ Tra-la-la-la-la" "Like I said, just another ordinary day." "CHORUS: ♪ Doofenshmirtz EvilIncorporated!" "♪" "Oh, man, why did I save all the manual labor on my newest Inator for the hottest day of the year?" "I might as well be doing hot yoga up in this piece!" "Can I get a "what, what"?" "Norm, where's my "what, what"?" "I'm sorry, sir." "People do not say that anymore." "How do you stay so current?" "Ah, Perry the Platypus!" "Won't you have a seat?" "That is not not how you sit on a chair." "Which means it is!" "Because I used a double negative." "Sure, it's grammatically incorrect, but it is the core of my newest creation, the Double-Negative-inator!" "It takes any negative statement and turns it into a double negative, which..." "Which in turn makes it positive." "I..." "Anyway, I was dreaming about cold weather, and I remembered how much I love the Minty Wink Egg Nog they make at Beverly's Lunch downtown." "So I went out to get one." "But then Beverly told me I couldn't have it, because they only make it in the winter." "No matter how I begged and pleaded, she stood firm." "No Minty Wink Egg Nog because it's not winter." "(GRUNTS) Anyway, once I recovered from the shock," "I did what I always do solve a simple problem by inventing a complicated and menacing machine." "All I have to do is blast Beverly with this and (BUZZES) she'll be like, "Oh, I guess you can have it because it's not not winter."" "And suddenly, I'm drinking Minty Wink Egg Nog, baby!" "Perhaps then I can make myself not not ruler of the Tri-State Area!" "Huh?" "Huh?" "You didn't see that coming, did you?" "(CHATTERS ANGRILY)" "Oh, don't be cranky, Perry the Platypus." "You can have a Minty Wink Egg Nog, too." "Nice work, guys." "with the world's largest drop of water!" "between water molecules so that the surface tension is virtually unbreakable!" "In your face, physics camp!" "Booyah!" "Come on, gang, let's surf the surface tension!" "Cowabunga!" "Totally awesome!" "(ALL CHEERING)" "BUFORD:" "Okay, today's the big day of the Danville Fish Show." "Are you nervous?" "Don't worry about it." "It's normal." "Just remember, today is your day to shine." "So are we gonna be scared?" "Just like we practiced, jump through the hoop." "You can do it, buddy." "Jump through the hoop." "Victory!" "(SIGHS) What am I gonna do, Stace?" "Jeremy wants to spend time with me but the best thing I could come up with is the mall." "That's how boring I am." "Well, there's a lot more interesting things to do." "The cafe, movie theater..." "It just all seems so, so ordinary." "I've just got to find something cool to do to get me out of my rut." "You want to come along?" "No, I'm sticking to the mall." "It's air conditioned." "CANDACE: ♪ I want to be extraordinary" "♪ Not just extra ordinary" "♪ It seems like everywhere I see" "♪ People far more interesting than me" "♪ I know that change is kind of scary" "♪ But, baby, I should try to vary (SIGHS)" "♪ Some minor detail, a small degree" "♪ A slightly different version of me" "♪ I could learn to cook vegetarian" "♪ or take a fashion workshop" "♪ Meditate, calculate, learn to knit a tank-top" "♪ Yoga, hula, clogging, jogging, walking on a tightrope" "♪ Take a correspondence course and learn to make my own soap" "♪ Jumping on a pogo-stick, standing in a wheat field" "♪ Going on a snipe hunt, got to keep my eyes peeled" "♪ Take a little time to really decorate my door" "♪ And change my hair to black and then I'll dye it back to orange" "♪ Underwater taxidermy, shopping for a suitcase" "♪ Peeling tangerines while placing second in a sack race" "♪ Lion taming, online gaming, trying to win a prize fight" "♪ Appearing on a talk show dressed up like a water sprite" "♪ Yeah, I'm gonna be extraordinary" "♪ I'm gonna stand out from the crowd" "♪ and shout out loud, you'll see" "♪ I'll be a brand new me" "On your marks, get set..." "(BLOWS WHISTLE)" "Spherical laps." "How cool is that?" "Awesome!" "The momentum from the swimming action is causing us to roll." "Looks like we're taking this pool party on the road!" "(ALL CHEERING)" "PHINEAS:" "Hey, you know what?" "We can totally steer this thing if we paddle opposite the direction we want to go." "Seems counter-intuitive, but okay!" "Full speed ahead, Ferb!" "Bumpy Street, dead ahead!" "And hang a right onto Zigzag Street!" "(ALL WHOOPING)" "PHINEAS:" "Whoa!" "Loop-de-loop Street!" "(ALL WHOOPING)" "MAN:" "At least it's rent-controlled!" "(CRASHING)" "I'm okay." "Happens all the time!" "(CAR ALARM RINGING)" "Okay, a few more tweaks and I'm ready to double-down on some negatives." "(GRUNTS) Wow, I... (GRUNTS)" "Now that double negative did not make a positive." "Ow!" "Oh, you're gonna get it now." "Oh, no, no, no!" "Oh, now it's stuck in random fire mode." "I don't know why I put that mode on there." "Not it!" "Not it!" "Not it!" "Not not it!" "We the members of the jury find the defendant..." "Not not guilty." "So I guess we find him guilty." "Funny, I could've sworn he was innocent." "(BLOWING WHISTLE)" "Hey!" "Can't you see the detour?" "This is not a through street!" "Like I said, it's not not a through street!" "Go ahead." "PHINEAS:" "All right!" "(ALL CHEERING)" "(GRUNTS) This isn't extraordinary." "It's just embarrassing!" "(CHEERING) PHINEAS:" "Hey, Candace!" "Phineas and Ferb!" "Thanks, Bobbi." "I'll see you next week." "Mom!" "Mom!" "Mom!" "Mom!" "Candace, what on earth is on your head?" "are rolling through town on a giant ball of water!" "Come on!" "Rodney Von Rodenstein and his pet piranha, Fluffy, with their hoop trick!" "(AUDIENCE GASPS)" "What a terrific new twist to a tired old trick!" "(AUDIENCE APPLAUDS)" "Let's see what the judges have to say." "(AUDIENCE APPLAUDS) Wow!" "That puts Rodney and Fluffy in the lead and almost impossible to beat!" "Next up are Buford and his pet goldfish, Biff, doing their version of the hoop jump trick." "Good luck topping that one, guys." "Okay, Biffy, we're up." "Jump through the..." "Oh, no!" "Public art!" "Right ahead!" "It must be part of the Public Art Relocation Program!" "(ALL SCREAMING)" "(ALL LAUGHING) PHINEAS:" "Yeah!" "You did it, Biff!" "We're number one!" "Congrats, guys!" "Thanks." "I'm gonna put Biff's prize money in a scholarship fund for that fancy fish school in the Maldives." "Wait until you see this giant ball of water!" "PHINEAS:" "Hi, guys!" "Come on in, the water's great!" "You're right, Candace, there is a giant ball of water." "Though most people prefer to call it a lake." "Wow!" "A party on the lake?" "I never would've thought of that!" "You come up with the best ideas." "You really want to go to the mall again?" "We're teenagers." "It's what we do." "Ha!" "You mi..." "Ow!" "(GRUNTS) Well, that was refreshing." "(EXPLOSION) Oh, that was not not the self-destruct button." "(GRUNTS) Well, oh, man, once again, the place is trashed, you just take off, leaving me here to clean it all up." "Does it ever occur to you, Perry the Platypus, how much of a mess is left after one of our little tete-a-tetes?" "that I keep talking to you for a while after you're gone!" "I mean, it's probably a sad commentary on my life that I'm wearing an apron and talking to a platypus that's no longer..." "How long have you been standing there, Vanessa?" "VANESSA:" "Long enough, Dad." "So, we all need to be prepared." "You want to find a safe place and establish a defensive perimeter." "Like in the basement?" "No!" "You never go in the basement!" "It's just our bi-monthly Zombie Apocalypse Preparedness lecture." "Yeah." "You're welcome to join us." "Please, Phineas." "There's nothing about zombies that I don't know." "Did you know there's one standing behind you?" "(SCREAMS)" "Very funny." "Ha!" "Good one, bro." "Phineas, Pinky's missing." "Oh, that's too bad, Isabella." "Chihuahuas." "That's the first thing zombies go for." "Uh, we've moved past zombies, Buford." "He's been gone all morning!" "He didn't even touch his breakfast burrito!" "What am I going to do?" "We could put up posters." "We could do nothing." "We could make a portable positronic canine detector using the olfactory receptors that Ferb and I were gonna use for our milligram-scale purification study." "Let's do that one." "You kids have fun." "but I have a lunch date with Jeremy down at City Hall." "City Hall serves lunch?" "I thought they only served subpoenas." "Oh, come on!" "What's a guy got to do to get a rimshot around here?" "(FRUSTRATED SIGH)" "For your information, I'm going down to City Hall because Jeremy's working in the Slushy Dawg concession stand at the food court there and we're gonna have lunch together." "But don't worry, Isabella," "I am sure Pinky will turn up." "Perry always does." "Speaking of which, where is Perry?" "And where's Pinky?" "And where's that breakfast burrito?" "(DRUM ROLL)" "Ha!" "There's my guy!" "Ah, Agent P. I believe you know Agent Pinky." "Agent Pinky informs us that Doof intends to steal the deed to the Tri-State Area from the City Hall archives." "It seems he's discovered that whoever has the deed automatically becomes the ruler." "It's an old law from a simpler time." "You'll find that Agent Pinky is quite an asset, Agent P." "He's good with computers, covert ops, and quite frankly, he needs the hours." "So get out there and stop Doofenshmirtz!" "Good luck, Agents P and, uh, P." "I guess you're just two peas in a pod." "(CHUCKLES)" "Carl, where's my rimshot?" "CARL:" "It's right in front of you." "How did you do that?" "Now I am here, but the best way to the food court is..." "Is by taking the mandatory City Hall tour!" "But..." "Wouldn't want a bunch of uninformed people wandering around City Hall." "I've been on this tour since this morning and I've been caught trying to escape twice!" "No talking back there." "Now follow me to a world of bureaucratic action and adventure!" "Perry the Platypus?" "No way!" "What a coincidence!" "Excuse me." "If you and your mullet will take one step to the..." "Thank you." "Oh, look, you brought your little dog, too!" "How cute." "Oh, FYI, I don't think they allow dogs in here, so, you know, watch out for that." "Anyway, I bet you're wondering why I'm in City Hall, right?" "Well, I plan to go down into the secret City Hall vault and steal the..." "Oh, you, you knew that, right?" "(HUFFS) 'cause that's probably why you're here, to stop me, right?" "What you probably don't know is how" "I will get into the vault without being noticed." "Behold!" "My Blend-into- the-Background-inator." "I will be able to search out and steal the hidden deed because, like they say, it's easier to find a hidden object when you're hidden as well." "What?" "(STAMMERS) That's a thing." "They say that." "Anyway, I place the Inator on my head, like so," "I press this button and I, I'm here, and I'm blended in." "I'm here, I'm gone, I'm here, I'm go..." "Oh, my head!" "(STUTTERS)" "I hope there's no long term damage from this, but, ugh..." "Anyway, I'll bet you think I forgot to trap you." "Well, surprise!" "You're already trapped!" "You see, you don't have a number, Perry the Platypus." "So by the time you and your little dog get into the archives," "I will already be ruler of the Tri-State Area!" "(LAUGHING)" "I'm sorry, you cannot go in there without a number, sir." "Oh, please don't tell me you brought your dog." "Behold!" "The Dog Sensomatic Helmet!" "It will amplify Buford's senses to those of a dog!" "Okay, Buford, uh, what do you smell now?" "I think I can smell the future." "It's working!" "Do you smell Pinky yet?" "I smell something." "(SNIFFING)" "I smell..." "(SNIFFING) I smell bacon!" "ISABELLA AND BALJEET:" "No, Buford, wait!" "PHINEAS:" "Uh-oh!" "Now this is a very old painting depicting John P. Tri-State and Otto H. Adjacent..." "Excuse me, I just need to get to the food court." "Please hold all your questions till the end, those are the rules." "And also, please refrain from gum chewing," "Also, there are no cutsies, or halfsies for funsies." "And absolutely no crossing the stanchions, please!" "No cruzar la cuerda, por favor!" "To the basement!" "(LAUGHS) Quit it!" "Fresh!" "All right, let's see..." ""Garage, basement," ""catacombs, pessimistic humanoid underground dwellings..."" "Ah!" "Here it is!" ""Gift Shop and Secret Vault!"" "Who's a good boy?" "It's me, right?" "Who's a good boy?" "You're a good boy!" "You mean me, right?" "Yes, you are!" "Yes, you are!" "Isabella?" "How does this help us with Pinky?" "Easy." "I've been rubbing his belly with Pinky's squeak toy." "Now he's got the scent!" "He's this way!" "I can smell it!" "Good boy!" "Yeah, I'm a good boy, right?" "Yes, you are!" "Huh?" "Oh, that had better not be the mailman." "No, Buford, you're supposed to be finding Pinky!" "(GRUNTS)" "(GROANS) What kind of elevator falls at the speed of gravity?" "Why did they even put an elevator there?" "I could just jump down the shaft or... (GASPS)" "The deed!" "Well, I guess it's not..." "Not all that hidden then, is it?" "Or maybe it's just easier to find 'cause I'm hidden!" "Yes!" "I knew that was a real saying!" "Come to papa!" "(ELEVATOR RINGS) (GASPS)" "Perry the Platypus?" "Oh, and your pet dog?" "How did you escape the clutches of bureaucracy?" "(STUTTERS) Oh, you took a number." "I guess the line wasn't as long as I thought." "Once I get outside, I will own the Tri-State Area!" "Wait!" "Which one is it?" "Oh, great!" "Now I'm confused!" "And over here are the spontaneous musical number dioramas." "The huh?" "Ooh, Danville is known for its spontaneous musical numbers." "For instance... ♪ used to be the Bi-State Area with an adjacent area over there" "♪ What people don't know is that originally" "♪ it was three distinct Single-State Areas," "♪ The founders of the area were independent thinkers" "♪ Completely unaffected by bureaucratic hurdles" "♪ And that's why the Capital Building was moved here from Sri Lanka" "♪ on the backs of seven giant sea turtles" "♪ It's the history of an area, the Tri-State Area" "♪ Formed mostly from adobe and seaweed" "♪ If you've heard it different elsewhere" "♪ That's historical hysteria" "♪ So, stop believing everything you read" "♪ Over here's a diorama of the first Diorama" "♪ Of Vincent Diorama who lived right here" "♪ When I say right here, I mean, in this very room" "♪ Till we moved him to a studio apartment last year" "♪ It's the history of an area, the Tri-State Area" "♪ Don't mean to cause a ruckus or a fuss" "♪ It's the purpose of the onion and the Danville Cafeteria" "♪ And home of Big Foot's hairless cousin Uzz" "♪ It's the history of an area, the Tri-State Area" "♪ Where planet Venus holds an office space" "♪ Try to think of someplace better" "♪ Well, I double-dog dare ya" "♪ But if you can't, then get out of my face" "♪ It's the history of the Tri-State Area ♪" "CHORUS: ♪ History of the Tri-StateArea,Area♪ for the history of the history of accounting." "(ALL GROAN)" "Okay, let's see." "The Declaration of Independence, the Magna Carta, the deed to the Tri-State..." "I mean, the Mayflower Compact." "Ha-ha!" "Goodbye, Perry the Platypus!" "BUFORD:" "Oh!" "Oh!" "In here!" "Follow Buford!" "Hey, you guys, he went in here." "Really?" "A doggie door in a municipal building that does not allow dogs?" "Wha..." "Uh, who did that?" "ISABELLA:" "This way, everyone!" "Let's see, how do you get out of here now?" "Hey!" "(BUFORD SNIFFS)" "(GRUNTS) (SNORTS)" "Huh?" "Another dog!" "This way!" "Oh, I hope it's Pinky." "(SNIFFING) Right here!" "Right here and..." "What?" "He should be right here." "Aw, man!" "Uh, maybe the helmet needs to be fine-tuned." "Yeah." "You guys do that." "I'm gonna go get a Slushy Dawg." "DOOFENSHMIRTZ:" "...R-I-D-E, colon." "Password?" "Oh, good, I'm really good at passwords." "Okay, let's see." "Uh, how about, uh, "reindeer flotilla"?" "Ah!" "And send." "Ha-ha!" "Yes!" "Now, I'll just take this deed outside and I'll be the ruler of the..." "Perry the Platypus?" "And your little dog, too?" "You're both persistent, I'll give you that." "But the security system is offline and there's nothing you or your little dog friend can do about it." "You know, unless one of you happens to be really good with computers." "MONOGRAM'S VOICE:" "Agent Pinky isgoodwithcomputers." "Good with computers." "Good with computers." "(WHISTLES)" "Wow!" "That guy is really good with computers!" "Now, who's ready to see the whole tour again?" "(MAN 1 SCREAMS) MAN 2:" "Run!" "Actually, the song part was nice." "Oh, you like the song, do ya?" "Well..." "Hey!" "Hold it!" "Is that a dog?" "Hey, it's Pinky!" "I'm sorry, no dogs allowed." "This tour is officially over." "Candace!" "Candace, you found him!" "Thank you!" "You said he'd turn up and he did!" "Oh, there you are, Perry!" "Way to go, Candace!" "Come on, you two wandering pets, who wants a breakfast burrito?" "I do!" "Exactly how long have you worked here at City Hall?" "Oh, I don't work here." "I was sent by Yarnak to help uninformed citizens in need." "Now, if you'll excuse me, I am needed elsewhere." "Whoosh!" "I'm sorry I missed lunch, Jeremy, but this weird guy made me go on a tour." "That's Don." "He's, uh, kind of a fixture around here." "I'm the ruler of the Tri-State Area!" "(DRUM ROLL)" "Oh, great!" "Now I'm confused!" "♪ It's the history of an area, the Tri-State Area" "♪ Don't mean to cause a ruckus or a fuss" "♪ It's the purpose of the onion and the Danville Cafeteria" "♪ And home of Big Foot's hairless cousin Uzz" "♪ It's the history of an area, the Tri-State Area" "♪ Where planet Venus holds an office space" "♪ Try to think of someplace better" "♪ Well, I double-dg dare ya" "♪ But if you can't, then get out of my face" "♪ It's the history of the Tri-State Area ♪" "CHORUS: ♪ History of the Tri-StateArea,Area♪"