"It's time to put on your munchkin shoes." "Give me your left foot." "No, no, that's your right foot." "This is a good time to teach you left from right." "I'm not busy." "Watch and learn." "This is my left hand." " Left?" " Wrong." "That's right." "What's right?" "Well, when I'm facing you, my left is your right." " I'm right?" " No, you're wrong." " That's right." " That's right?" "No, this is" " Well, actually" "You see, my left is your right, and your left is my right." "You're nuts." "She left." " You're right." " Hey, get--!" "[GROWLS]" "Hey, potato chips, come out." "I wanna eat you." "Michelle, are you eating our goodies?" "I'm trying." "Those are for the ride to the amusement park." "Aw, nuts." "[HORN HONKS]" "That's Kimmy's mom." "Dad, hurry up." "I need my sweater." "Okay, it's ready and it is perfect." "It has been hand-washed, presoaked and flat-dried according to manufacturer specifications." "Great." "I guess you won't be needing this garment bag, huh?" "Joey, where's the camera?" "Right here." "I went to the store." "I got you some extra batteries, some extra film, lens tissue and I attached the handy travel strap." "On second thought, I don't wanna lug all that stuff around." "I'll just buy some postcards." "In that case, how about just a picture of a guy who just wasted 20 minutes." "Yeah, I mapped out the whole park for you." "The best foods, the best ride and the best order to minimize the wait and maximize the fun." "That's okay, Uncle Jesse." "We don't need it." " Why?" " Well, all we're gonna be doing is riding Screaming Thunder over and over all day long." "Yeah, first you go up about 10 miles then you turn upside down and fall about a million miles an hour." "And the whole time you're going:" "BOTH:" "Ah!" "That's okay, I had fun making this anyway." "[HORN HONKS]" " Bye, I'll see you guys later." " Bye." "Oh, wait a minute, girls." "Aren't you forgetting something?" "BOTH:" "Money." "What's a hug compared to the joy of emptying one's wallet?" "All right, Michelle, here's a little tip." "Eat your corn dog, your taco and your ice cream after you go on the throw-up rides." "You got it, dude." " Bye, Dad." " I'll see you guys later." "Have a lot of fun." "Okay, honey." "We're all set for our picnic." "JESSE:" "Yeah." " You kids have a great time." " Thank you, Dad." " All right, let's watch some basketball." " Yes." "It's raining." "It's times like these I wish I had a big sister." "Hi, Tanners." "Here's your paper." "Guess what." "I mouthed off to my mom and she grounded me." " Why aren't you home?" " Because she grounded me here." "BOTH:" "No." "Yes." "She said if I stay home with her, she'll just be punishing herself." "Jess, what do you say we move this picnic to my place?" "What do I say?" "What do I have to say?" "Have mercy." "I have a better idea." "Let's have the picnic in my room." "Come on, Dad, you're gonna take me and Kimmy to the movies." "Let's play hide-and-seek." "Sure, I had nothing else planned today." "Sure." "JESSE:" "I really wanna go" " I'll play hide-and-seek." "D.J.:" "Dad, I think we're late." "KIMMY:" "Now we totally missed the show." "DANNY:" "Oh, come on." "Nice going, Mr. T." "Don't call me Mr. T." "Kimmy, it is not my fault the movie was sold out." "Well, Dad, you have to admit, you did drive a little on the slow side." "My grandmother goes faster than you." "Without a car." "What a great picnic." "Oh, yeah, for you." "You ate all the caviar." "Who knew stinky little fish eggs could be so delicious?" "Glad you enjoyed it, Steph." "Danny, you owe me $200." " I've gotta get going." "DANNY:" "See you later." "Bye, Danny." " Bye, honey." "JOEY:" "Bye, Becky." " Bye, Joey." " Joey?" "Joseph, what are you doing in there?" "I'm playing hide-and-seek with Michelle." "I found you." "Thanks a lot, Jess." "Hey, guys, good news." "The new ice-skating rink just opened today." "You guys can take us." "You don't have to wait in the parking lot." "You can come in and watch us." "Let's go get our skates." "Wait for me." "I got little legs." "When did we agree to take them ice-skating?" "They don't even ask anymore." "They assume their wish is our command." "And the worst part is, I don't remember one thank-you today, do you?" "Let's see: "Give me, get me, take me, make me, buy me, drive me, find me."" "Nope, no "thank you."" "Those girls are so unappreciative." "I cook, I clean, I iron, I" "I'm starting to sound like my mother." "Let's give them a taste of their own medicine." "Okay, boys, let's ride." "Girls, new plan." "Come over here." "We're gonna stay home and we are gonna play a new game called We're the Kids and You're the Adults." "So you get to be in charge." "We're the adults?" "You mean we can do whatever we want?" " Yep." " All right." "Yes." "There's gotta be a catch." "There better be a catch." "Danny, lay a catch on them." "Yes, there is a catch." "You girls have to assume all the responsibilities that come with parenting." "Okay, let's catch the end of that basketball game." "Not so fast." "Let's see if this works." "No watching TV until your rooms are clean." " What?" " Oh." "Guess that means I can watch." "I'm ready to ice-skate." "Forget it." "We're not going ice-skating." "Make up your minds." "[THUNDER RUMBLES]" " Party time." " Okay, you guys got the ice cream?" "Let's watch the Top 10 Video Countdown." "All right." "I love being grounded here." "I want my ice cream." "You want your ice cream." "That's what I said." "Don't you listen?" "Okay, on your mark, get set, pig out." "KIMMY:" "Yeah." "D.J.:" "All right." "Girls, lunchtime." "No thanks." "We skipped right to dessert." "No, I mean lunch for us kids, remember?" "The people you're responsible for." "The catch." "Come on." "I cleaned my room and everything." "Okay, we'll make lunch, but you kids have to set the table." "I'm gonna get out of here before they put me to work." "Don't touch my ice cream." "All right, peanut butter and jelly on wheat." "Ham and cheese on rye and egg salad on white, no crust." "If you guys will excuse us, we might still catch some of the top 10 videos." "Hurry, you're missing number five." " We're coming." " Let's go." "Hey, hold it." "This is grape jelly." "You guys know I like strawberry jelly." "How could that have slipped my mind?" "One peanut butter and strawberry jelly coming up." " Bye." " Oh, Steph, before you go..." " ...can I have some juice?" " Juice, of course." "Where was my head?" " Glass." " Hey, that sounds like a great idea." "Why don't you make that two." " Anybody else want juice?" " No." "Make mine milk." "Okay." "All right." "Peanut butter and strawberry jelly." "All right, PBSJ." "Steph, I wanted orange juice." "[GROANS]" "I'll take apple." "Apple for the big guy." "I will see you in the living room." "Hold it." "Still got grape on one of these corners." "Then don't eat that corner." "Once the sandwich is closed, it's hard to tell which is the grape-infested corner." "There, now you're safe." "Milli Vanilli is next." "Rock 'n' roll." "I'm coming." "Girls, before we drink, we need ice." "Ice?" "Ice it is." "Make mine cubes, not crushed." "Make mine crushed, not cubed." "Would anyone like them carved as little animals?" "Hey, this is chunky peanut butter." " Yeah, so?" " I'm just not in a chunky kind of mood." "Well, I'm not making you another sandwich." "I'm not asking you to." "What I am asking is if you can take these itsy-bitsy, ugly chunks of peanuts out of my sandwich." "That's it." "Lunch is over." "Could you make this half crushed, half cubed?" "I've had it." "Go to your rooms." "Right now." "March." "Great game, Danny." "We're being punished." "STEPH:" "And no talking." " Come on." " Go to your rooms, guys." " Go, boys." " Go." "Talk about your selfish, spoiled brats." "All I have to say is how rude." "Joey, we need to talk." "You guys snuck down here, man." "The girls grounded us." "We're all gonna get in big trouble." "It's a game, you idiot." "How did my plan backfire?" "We took them for granted, just like they did to us and they never even made the connection." "If we don't put a stop to this now we're gonna be waiting on them for the rest of our lives." "For the rest of our lives?" "Oh, man, I can see it now." "We're still living in the house." "The girls are still living in the house." "That dog Comet is still living in the house." "This is not a pretty picture." "Stay, Comet." "Play dead." "You are just playing, aren't you?" "All right, come on, dusty let's see if you still got any suck left in you." "Whoa, dusty!" "All right, boy." "[IMITATES POPEYE] Well, blow me down." "Where's me Olive Oyl?" "Oh, you dirt-obsessed old fool, you sucked up my chip." "I knew you were gonna drop it." "Do I look like I've dropped any chips?" " They're all in there." "Millions of them." " Yeah." "Hey, what are you guys muttering about?" "Every time I come around, you're muttering." "You're muttering to him, he's muttering to" " You guys, go home." "Boy, it's a beautiful day." "I remember when I ate a burrito in I994...." "We're muttering?" "We're muttering?" "You're muttering." "You think you're such a hot young stud you in your jungle jammies." "Well, at least I still have my hair." "Oh!" "Oh!" "Now I have your hair." "[LAUGHING]" "[KNOCKING]" "Hold it." "That's my date." "Put my hair, fast." " Okay, hold on." "Okay." " Go." "Go." "How's it look?" "Oh, very lifelike." "DANNY:" "Help me with the food, Joey." "Ooh, Jesse." "My main squeeze." "I wouldn't squeeze me too hard." "I just ate." "Thanks for the warning." "Hey, Becky, look out for that hippopotamus behind you." "Oh, sorry." "You know, you really ought to put some reflectors on that thing." "Have...." " A nice bowl of Cream of Wheat?" "JESSE:" "No." "It has nothing to do with breakfast." "Have...." "Mercy." "You old poop." "No, no, no." "It's" " It's: "Have pity"...." "Come on, babe, let's go down to the Smash Club and you can watch me do my thing." "I'm so proud of you." "My honey is the world's oldest Elvis impersonator." "[IMITATES ELVIS] Thank you very much, pretty mama." "Watch me shake." "Oh!" "Joey, did you leave me some donuts?" "Well, if I did, it was purely by accident." "Hey." "Hey, hey, hey." "Hey, don't look at my woman." "Where am I supposed to look?" "Your woman is everywhere." "Come on." "Let's take the girls their breakfast." "Okay, but try not to eat it all on the way up, Joey." " You fat guy." " Stop muttering." "Stop muttering." "Well, guess I'll just have a seat." "Better make that two." "Hey, hey, hey." "Drop that toast." "Get off my case." "I found it in my robe." " You're a slob, Joey." " You're a tall slob." "Okay, rise and shine." "Come on, get up, D.J." "Breakfast before noon?" "How rude." "I'm so disgusted with hearing "how rude."" "Dad, I can't take it anymore." "I need my own room." "This town is full of rooms." "Go rent one, the both of you." "Why would I leave?" "Uncle Jesse does my cooking Joey does my laundry, and Dad, you do my cleaning." "I love my life." "Your perkiness is no longer cute." "Danny, I think it's time for the "one day you'll appreciate your sister" lecture." "Girls, one day you'll appreciate your sister." " Good lecture." " Thank you." "Now hug." "MEN:" "Aw." "TOGETHER:" "Now move out." "Michelle." "Michelle, hurry up and get in here and get your breakfast before it becomes another chin for Joey." "Hi, people." "Michelle, just in time for breakfast." "Oh, I'm not in the mood for breakfast." "Do you have any ice cream?" "ALL:" "It's ice cream." "And I ate the last gallon this morning." "Aw, nuts." " Hi, Tanners." " Kimmy Gibbler!" "Oh, my God." "MEN [TOGETHER]:" "Whoa, baby." "Eat your hearts out, boys." "Too bad you weren't nicer to me when I was a kid." "[HUFFING]" "Come on, girls." "We gotta get to the mall." "Adiós, Tanners." "I'll get Dad's credit cards." "I'll go make a list of chores for the guys to do while we're gone." "And don't forget, we'll need a ride." "Whoever can make it downstairs first will drive you." "You got it, dude." "She was so smart when she was 3." "What happened?" "Well, did you hear one thank-you today?" "DANNY AND JOEY:" "No." "How could you let your kids get so out of control?" "Well, you can't blame me." "I'm just the old fat guy who lives in the basement." "Our lives are pathetic." "No, your hair is pathetic." " Get that." " Oh, no." " Catch the rug." " Don't take my hair." " Come on, now, boys." " I'm in the clear, over here." " No, Joey." " Yeah, I got it." "Joey, one more time." " Joey, throw it, my boy." " It's not funny." " Two points." " Give me my hair!" " Give me my hair!" " Get away from me." "My arm." " Oh, my bursitis." "My hip." " Give me my hair!" "Give me my hair!" "I hear you, for crying out loud." "And we all lived miserably ever after." " That was so depressing." " Yeah." "Can you imagine the girls still living here?" "No, not that." "My hair." "Well, it doesn't have to happen that way." "We can all learn something from that little story." "Yeah, I'm gonna start being really nice to Kimmy Gibbler." "Uncle Jesse, Daddy, I thought we sent you two to your rooms." " They snuck down without permission." " Kiss-up." "I think it's time we had a little talk with you boys." "Great, first we're punished and now we're getting a lecture." "You deserve a lecture after the way you behaved today." "We try and make you a nice lunch, and what do we get?" "Zippo." "Not a thank-you." "Not a "thanks." Not a "Hey pal, good going."" "Not a "Way to go, chum."" "Not a "Muchas gracias, amigo."" " Not a" " Steph, they get it." "Well, girls, let me ask you something." "How does it feel not to get a thank-you?" "Crummy." "Well, just imagine how much crummier you would've felt if you had to wash our sweaters." "Rush out for our film." "Shared your caviar picnic." "Dropped everything to take us to the movies." "Excuse us." "Did you say a thank-you for any of the things they did for us today?" "No." "Did you?" "No." "So this game was to teach us a lesson." "And you know what?" "We needed one." "I think we owe them a couple thousand thank-yous." "We really blew it today." "You guys do so much and you're so wonderful and sometimes we just expect you to be wonderful and we forget to tell you how much we appreciate how wonderful you are." "What we're trying to say is you guys are really wonderful." "And I just wanna say, thank you." "Thanks." "Hey, pal, good going." "Way to go, chum." "[SPEAKS SPANISH]" "Steph, just hug them." "Thank you." "Subtitles by SDI Media Group" "[ENGLISH SDH]"