"since I have to rely on other people to tell me who I am" "I don't get to spend that much time alone." "In fact the last time I had some peace and quiet was when I was in my coma." "I'm so looking forward to the day when I can be completely independent." "but in the meantime, it's pretty cool when I figure something out all by myself." " oh,no!" "Oh,no!" " Unplug it!" "Unplug it!" "What are you doing?" "Don't you know you're not supposed to put metal in a microwave?" "Well,I do now!" "God,you'd think something that important they'd have it written on there or something." "Why are you cooking in my apartment?" "Why aren't you home?" "Because my mom won't let me use the stove cause she said I'll burn the house down." "Oh,man." "What's wrong with your leg?" "Nothing.I just--I had to go up and down the stairs five times to get stuff from the grocery." "I swear when I get my own apartment," "I am going to live in a one-story building inhabited only by people who share my dislike of elevators." "Dislike?" "Is that what we call a paralyzing phobia now?" "Have you ever been in an elevator?" "It is like riding in a coffin falling down a mine shaft." "Look,I'm just frustrated with my learning curve or my relearning curve." "Someday I'm gonna have to be taking care of myself and I'm gonna have to learn how to cook." "Well,that'll be a first You never cooked before." "Yeah,well,I do now." "Check this out." "That'S,saucy." "Did you put oregano in that?" "Why?" "Oh." "so I'm allergic to oregano." " Whats oregano again?" " It's a spice." "you guys suck." "Oh,I would kill to have a food allergy It's like nature's diet." "I spent five years trying to become lactose-intolerant." "God,I can't take care of myself." "I can't even feed myself." "Okay,enough with sam time Now it's andrea time." "So.I remember this guy I dated named peter" "Can we make sure to leave" "Because sometimes we run out most of the time," " if not" "So,sam,you remember peter,right?" "We met him here the night we discovered sake bombs?" "No,andrea.I don't remember because I have amnesia." "Okay,back to me." "Anyway,I cannot remember his phone number, so I went to this hypnotherapist to see if she could help." " Ooh!" "Did it work?" " Not yet,but... wait a minute." "A hypno was it hypnotherapist can help you get your memories back?" "Oh,yeah." "They can help with lots of things insomnia,smoking." "fear of dinosaurs." "Can you maybe put me in touch with your hypnotherapist?" "Yes,that is a great idea!" "Yes,you were here the night peter gave me his number!" "Maybe you'll remember it!" "Um,actually." "andrea,I was thinking about you know maybe getting some of my memories back you know,about me it's still andrea time." "Okay,so guess what I remember?" "Samantha Who S01E06" "Samantha,you are not going to to see any hypnotherapist." "And what is wrong with me trying to get my memories back?" "Don't do it,sam.Those guys are charlatans." "We saw one in branson." "He made me think I was a duck." " Howard!" "That was a hypnotist" " I don't care what he was." "He made me quack the oscar mayer wiener song." "It was humiliating." "Why,why are you being like this?" "I mean,is there something that you don't want me to find out about?" "I just don't want you digging around in your past." "You know,most people would pay to forget the things you've done." "Well,it's too bad because they're my memories,and I want them." "Well,you may think you want them." " You remember when you were 8?" " No." "You thought you wanted a trampoline until you hit your head on that beehive." "Why would you put a trampoline underneath a beehive?" "To keep you from jumping too high." " Everything I have done is for your own good." " Really?" " Even when you tell me things that aren't true?" " I've never lied to you." "Two weeks ago,you told me that my best friend in high school was an exchange student from prague." " But you loved helena." " You made her up!" "Well,forgive me for trying to broaden your ctural experiences." "when I count backward from three, you'll open your eyes and remember everything we just uncovered." "Ready?" "Three.Two.One." "I'm adopted!" "I am adopted!" "Yes!" "I am not genetically destined to turn out like those two." "I wonder what your birth parents are like." "Maybe your mom's a princess.ooh!" "Maybe your dad's a ninja." "what if your dad's hot?" "I'm just saying." "You might wanna stay away from dating older men right now" " just in case" " I think something's wrong with you." "Why wouldn't they tell me about this?" "What?" "Who cares?" "You're adopted." "It is so in right now,I can't even tell you." "Really,get some bronzer You can be from anywhere in the world." "Did I mention the necklace?" "I remember that I had this heart-shaped necklace that my birth parents gave me." "Oh,god.I want it.Where is it?" "It's all very stressful." "Oh,I need a cigarette." " No,no,you don't smoke." " Well,apparently,I used to." "Thank you,hypnotherapy." "Actually,you started smoking because of me,you know?" "Yeah,we used to hide cigarettes in the vent in your room and smoke when your mom was out." "I thought it would make us fit in better with the cool kids." "It worked for one of us." "Guess which one?" "all right." "Well,I'm gonna go home and I'm gonna tell them that I know that I'm adopted, and you know what?" "We're gonna sit down and we're gonna have a grown-up conversation like grown-ups." "And ding!" "Did you remember peter's number?" " Mom - ad?" "I found out what you didn't want me to know." "I'm adopted." "adopted!" "No such luck,kiddo." "Is that what the hypnotherapist told you?" "Yes,but it's okay because families can be made in many different ways, and because you chose me,that makes me special." "Chose you?" "No.We didn't choose you." "Oh,honey,this is what I warned you about You let people fill your head with ideas." "It's like when you went to that guidance counselor and he told you you were gifted." "Okay.Well,then can I please see my birth certificate?" "You don't have one." "You drew all over it with a green marker when you were 4 years old." " Well,I can still see it" " No." " Then we lost it" " Hmm." "Well,then I will just order another one." "Well,good luck with that You were born in international waters." "Really?" "On a pirate ship?" " A cruise ship." " Almost named you "carnival."" "mm,wow." "You guys must have some really amazing photos from that trip,huh?" " We should tell her" " What?" "It's okay.Just tell me." "One night,your dad and i were out back in the garden, and somebody broke into the house and stole all your photo albums." "Oh,not someone." "It was that shawn miller kid." "And if I wanted to find this shawn miller kid." "turns out it wasn't even his real name." "Of course not!" "His family was here illegally." "They got deported before we got any of the pictures back." "Yeah,they were kurds or something." "Oh,honey,they were icelandic." "Yeah,see,no one suspects an icelander." "You ever noticed that "reykjavik" and "wreak havoc" are eerily s-- where'd she go?" " Maybe the hynotherapist was wrong" " Mnh-mnh.No." "You should have heard them They had an answer for everything." "Now I'm not worried that I was adopted." "I'm afraid I was kidnapped." " You have a very interesting life." " Mm,don't I?" "I just want the truth,that's all." "And a cigarette.Ugh!" "Ooh,you know,something funny did happen to me today." "well,my dog into my closet,and when he came out... that's hilarious.I gotta go." "damn it.I forgot to call "dena time."" "what about this?" "Huh,liars?" "What?" "What is that?" "Don't look,regina.She's trying to hypnotize us." "This is a necklace given to me by my birth parents." "I knew it!" "Admit it.I'm adopted." "No,no,samantha.Look,come and talk." "Why?" "So you can tell me more lies?" "Oh,no.No,let me guess.Um," "I'm from the future or maybe you rescued me from the pit of a volcano." " Okay,just calm down." " I'm not gonna calm down!" "I trust you two to tell me the truth but obviously,you can'T." "And you know what?" "I can't afford to have relationships that are based in lies because I need to know who I am." "I don't even care if I'm adopted, but I just don't feel safe here with you anymore." "You know what?" "I'm leaving,'cause you're not my parents and this is not my home!" " Samantha,don't do this!" " Ugh!" "I'm not a duck!" "I'm not a duck!" "bestfriends are there for you so.i just left" "Whoever those people are I just I couldn't be there anymore." "Well,good for you.You did the right thing." "so.where are you gonna stay?" "Well,I thought I would just stay here." "Mm!" "Oh,why would you think that?" " Because we're best friends." " Yes,we are!" "But we're also grown-ups and grown-ups take care of themselves." "This isn't--this is not how this was supposed to happen." "You're--you're supposed to say,you know," ""oh,sam,sweetie,you can stay as long as you want and--and--and then we eat cookies." "Well,sam,you're making me feel like a bad friend." "Well,you're being a bad friend." "Look at this.See that hole?" "That hole is when you and i tried to live together." "You threw a lamp at me." " Why did I do that?" " Because I threw a lamp at you." " Over what?" " I don't know.It was something about a scrunchie." " Point is,no." " But,andrea,I'm different now." "But I'm not,and I care about being your friend way too much to be here for you,okay?" " Yeah." " Get your bag." " Did you remember peter's nu-- - no!" "ex-boy friends are there for you" "Thank you for letting me stay here." "Is it okay if I move these pillows?" "Oh,it's your place.You can do whatever you want." "You used to freak out if the little one ended up behind the big one." "You know what?" "I apologize for everything that I have ever said." "I'm actually gonna make little cards that have that printed on it." "Well,it's not so much what you said, but the skin on your face would kind of pull back,and al your eyes." "teeth and skull." "You kinda looked like a great white shark." "you know,maybe I'll put these pillows back like they were." "No,no,no,no." "Please,it's fine.It's fine." "See?" "You were always straight with me,even if it makes me look bad." " Right" " That's what I like about you,though,todd." "You always tell me the truth." "You are just a good and decent human being, and there just aren't a lot of you out there in the world." "No,I promise you." "I will get out of here first thing in the morning." "I am gonna go find my own place." "Well,this is your place." "that's very nice of you,but I don't wanna get in the way." "No,I-I mean, this is your place." "You iughtt with your money that." " that you made." " Hmm." "You're telling me.that I own this apartment?" "Yeah." "This is my pie?" "There it is--the great white shark!" " You let me move out?" " You said you wanted to." "Beuse I thought that I had to!" "It would have been nice for me to be able to make that decision on my own." "Oh,god,and you just let me stand there and thank you for telling me the truth when at any point you could've just added that you're just a big,fat freeloading liar." "Get out." " Wait,sam - no,no.Get out.Out." "I cannot believe anything that you or my friends or my family tell me anymore so I am living in a liar-free zone." "Where am I supposed to go?" "Can't hear you!" "Liar-free zone." "Finally." "Samantha time." "[who needs 'em?" "] Uh,yeah,I'd like to order something." "Yeah,uh,that's the thing,actually." "I don't really know what it is that I can eat, so,um,kung pao beef--is that dangerous?" "No?" "Oh." "'Cause it says it says "pow" right in it." "Actually,uh,can you just bring me a bunch of stuff and stand next to me to see if I die?" "Gum.Cigarettes!" "Cigarettes.!" "That'll kill my appetite." "Okay." "(Mouth full) matches,matches,matches,matches." "Mm.Okay,no." "Oh!" "Oh,my god!" "ugar es grande." "finally,the truth" "Hey,frank." "Isn't it just great to just be all by yourself like you are just all day long?" "Please keep moving in a forward motion.Thank you." "Yeah,you know what?" "I can do whatever I want,too." "Like,just now,I just got back from the hypnotherapist." "You know what?" "I learned more in that 45-minute session than anybody in my life has been telling me in weeks." "First of all,I'm adopted.I don't know if I told youhat." "But I also remember this big,tall,bald man who I'm pretty sure is my birth father, and he gave me this beautiful heart-shaped locket, and I had all these friends and we would just sing all the time and have these amazing adventures." "And did you have a dog?" "Yeah!" "I did." " Named sandy?" " Yes." "How did you know that?" " Because that's "annie." " Annie?" " Who's annie?" " Maybe far away or maybe real nearby he may be pouring her coffee (coffee) she may be straightening his tie oh!" "That is "annie."" "I played annie.Oh,gosh,my parents.My mom!" "I said some very bad things." "I guess that means I didn't meet president roosevelt,huh?" "I feel so stupid for not remember this." "I was even in the play,too.See?" ""Understudy but you never got sick.Not one night,no." "Healthy as a horse." "My poor mom.I can neve hfaceer again." "Why don't you tell her you're sorry?" ""Sorry" is not gonna be good enough,not after what I said." "Thank you,though,for,um,being the keeper of all my memories." "You're welcome." "It's a little weird,you know?" "You have so many." "I know,but it's worth it." " shawn miller certainly thought so." " Shawn miller?" " The icelander?" " Mum-mmm" "He was real?" "How do you think I got this picture of your first dance recital?" "oh,no." "Hi." "Cheer up,miss newly." "The sun'll come out." " Guess when?" " Suck it,frank." "So in one day,I destroyed my parents, got kicked out by my best friend, made my ex-boyfriend homeless and almost burned down my own apartment." "Oh,yeah.Independence is awesome." " Oh." " May I come in?" "Mm-hmm." "Well,uh,I brought you tta lile something a little care package from my home to yours." "It's nothing special.Just,um,some decorations and some food,and-- food!" " I'm so sorry about what happened" " You can save what you wanna say until after you've swallowed." "I made the food.I don't need to see it again." "Sorry." "Oh!" "I brought you something else." "I looked for that for five hours last night." "It was in with your dad's tools, which means it was special to him It was special to me,too." "Think is still wet." "So?" "Look,I.I don't know what you want from me." "I just wanna know what is true and what is not true not what you think that I wanna hear." "The truth is,I never wanted you to go to that hypnotherapist in the first place." "Yeah,I know,because you were looking out for me." "No,'cause I was looking out for me." "I.I wasn't a perfect mother." "I was selfish sometimes,and--and I made mistakes, and I-I let you down." "And I was afraid that if you remembered who I was, that you." "wouldn't want me around anymore." "I was annie!" " What?" " I know I wasn't adopted." "I remembered playing "annie".in school." "Oh,that's right.Oh,that's right,you did." "Uh.and not--not your best role." "You don't play "adorable" well.It comes off as snide." "(Sighs) look." "I am so sorry for all those things that I said I do wanna have a relationship with you." "so I get to be your mother again?" "Mm-hmm.You're my mommy." "I need you!" "I need help." "I'm very hungry,but I keep starting fires." "poor baby.It's okay." "That's my girl.That's my girl." "That's my girl!" "That's my girl!" "Ooh!" "You're so naughty." " I learned it from you,slut!" " Oh,yeah.Oh,yeah.Oh!" "Peter!" "Watch my moneymaker." "Ah,ah-ah,ah-ah,oh." "312-555-0192." "now what are you saying?" "You're mumbling." "Nothing.Nothing." " can we please go home?" " Of course." "You always have a home with us." "Oh,n-now when you see your room you might notice your father's old soloflex." "I'll have him move it back out.Now don't get hysterical." "okay,so maybe I'm not ready to be completely independent just yet." "I mean,I'm trying to catch up on three decades of a life here." "Cut me some slack." "Look,I know I don't have to remember it all right now, and I guess sometimes I forget that figuring out who I am is hard on everybody." "We're all trying our best,and we're going to make mistakes." "We have to go easy on each other." "Oh,you know what?" "Uh,frank," "I called todd and he's--he's coming back,so you can just let him in." "He apologized and everything and I said,"it's okay.You know,I'm not really actually ready--"" "I'm sorry.Can I interrupt?" "Yeah.What is it?" "I'm sure I'll think of something." "So.how's the hypnotherapy going?" "Oh,that was a big bust.Total waste ofanime d money." "Oh,I wouldn't say that." " How come?" " I noticed you ok the elevator down." "What?" "the road to independence takes time, but no matter where you came from or where you're headed, the journey's always better when you get to turn to someone and say," ""thanks for being here." "How you can manage to get filthy walking from a building to a car is absotely amazing." "You get that from your father,not from me."