"Obsessional, negative thoughts about work." "The hours, ludicrous staff meetings the stink of the halls and the patients." "The patients...." "You find yourself searching for ways not to hate them." "You know, little tricks, like she shares a birthday with your mother or he looks like the brother of a friend." "It doesn't work." "You feel nothing." "Every drop of pleasure has drained from your life." "You can't sleep." "You can't think." "You can't concentrate" "Trouble sleeping?" "No, I was just catching up on some work." "I worry you're not getting enough sleep." "Are you okay?" "Fine." "What are you working on?" "Patient history." "Div...." "Listen, you go back to bed." "Okay?" "It's late." "Who is it?" "You think that I could maybe" "Come in?" "Thank you." "Rain stopped." "It's gonna be a beautiful day." "Have you seen my razor?" "I don't think so." "Sorry about the mess." "I'm amazed how much stuff women can fit in an overnight bag." "Just the bare essentials." ""Hydrating eye mask number four."" "Takes five years off." "Really?" "Are you packed?" "We'll be rushing tonight." "Yeah, except for my razor." "Good." "Oh, Mr. Button missed a hole." "Come here." "I'll pick you up after work." "We'll be in Nassau by morning, and the next three days you're mine." "Sounds good to me." "I tell you, I feel funny about you paying for everything." "Oh, please." "We both know you don't make any money." "You're a resident." "A pediatric resident." "You know what?" "That blue Armani shirt l got you would go better with this tie." "Happy Thanksgiving." "Malik, Happy Thanksgiving." "You too." "Nice shirt." "Thanks." "Hi, Dr. Ross." "Hi." "Excuse-- What's your name?" "Bob." "Happy Thanksgiving." "Happy Thanksgiving to you, Bob." "These are Halloween decorations." "We just took those down." "No, I put up." "See?" "Yes, I see." "Carry on." "Dr." "Ross." "Hey, Jer, what's the good word?" "I got a little interoffice minutiae for you here." "Your contribution to the potluck dinner?" "It's pecan pie." "I bought it myself." "Don't be shy." "Just help yourself." "Thanks." "Dr. John, what do you got over there?" "I'm practicing sutures." "What is that?" "Oh, it's a pig's foot." "The elasticity's comparable to human skin." "It's great for practicing. I've got half a dozen in my freezer at home." "Carter, are you snacking between meals?" "See what's holding up the blood gases on the wheezer in 3." "You got it." "Hey, Doug." "Good morning, Carol." "Still going to Bermuda, or can you work Saturday night?" "The Bahamas, and forget it." "I'm gone." "Jen and Rach coming down?" "And her folks." "Dinner with the reverend." "Kid with the croup in 3." "Thank you, Lydia." "Terrific." "When things slow down, I need to talk to you." "All right." "Carol...." "Thank you." "Who put this here?" "I believe it was Bob." "Can we move it somewhere?" "We can certainly try." "Thanksgiving." "What a farce!" "What do we gotta be grateful for, huh?" "Rwanda?" "Flesh-eating bacteria?" "Entertainment Tonight?" "Mr." "Luck, quiet." "Piss off!" "That's ironic, coming from a man with no kidneys." "Labs are back." "He's uremic." "Blood alcohol's .25." "And the media." "Brainwashers, all of them filling kids' heads with filth!" "I love you, you love me We're a happy family" "Mr. Luck, how long has it been since you were dialyzed?" "Those Nazis at the clinic won't let me in the door." "Apparently Mr. Luck was banned for abusing the staff." "I got a right to my opinion, don't I?" "Mr. Luck, you're an end-stage renal failure." "But don't worry." "We're going to save your life." "Such as it is." "Prep him for dialysis." "I'll get the machine." "And you know what really gets me?" "All this talk about an "information superhighway."" "Five hundred channels of crap!" "You know, the more I see of people, the more I like pigs." "42-year-old woman crashed into a bridge abutment." "She's alert and oriented." "Vitals are normal." "Should I bring anything for tonight?" "Tonight?" "Thanksgiving dinner." "Your mother invited me." "Carter, my mother isn't in control of her faculties." "So I'm not invited now?" "Don't your parents want you at home?" "My parents are in Switzerland visiting my sister." "Switzerland, huh?" "Have you seen Mookie?" "No." "Mrs. Carleton, I'm Dr. Benton." "We're gonna make sure you don't have any serious injuries, okay?" "Carter, take a look at the head." "This isn't gonna hurt a bit." "Okay." "Do you feel any pain here, ma'am?" "Okay." "What about here?" "A little blood in the canals." "Excuse me." "We've got a deep lac here." "About 1 0 centimeters." "Don't worry." "There won't be scarring." "Penetrating lac on the right side." "Ma'am, we have to remove your clothes." "Okay, if you could just turn on your side, please." "Okay." "Lower back looks good." "Upper back looks good." "A few scratches." "Contusion to the left scapula, no costal" "Dr. Benton?" "We seem to have a new piece of information here." "With superficial bruises along the co" "Coccyx." "Could somebody please get me a gown?" "Mr." "Carleton-- -l go by "Miss."" "Trauma coming." "MVA, 3 people, all critical." "Alright, Carter, take her next door and sew her up." "By myself?" "High-speed collision." "Two teenagers in one car." "Both thrown from the vehicle, one unconscious." "Head injuries." "Vitals?" "None." "Looks like a loser." "Doug, we need your help!" "What have we got?" "Talk to me." "Traumatic full arrest." "Here comes the second one." "Clear the way!" "He's conscious." "Broken right femur, pressure 90 over 60." "Pulse 1 1 0." "Let's go." "Someone call Ortho." "lt hurts!" "Where does it hurt?" "My guts." "What happened?" "Ran a red, hit a 22-year-old girl." "He the driver?" "Don't know." "Car belonged to Larry Parks." "Are you Larry Parks?" "No, Andy." "That must be the girl." "They left her there." "Decapitated." "Okay, Andy?" "Andy, tell me where it hurts." "Here?" "Here?" "Everywhere!" "Carol, we need to hold him down." "You gotta stay still." "lt hurts!" "Can we give him something?" "50 mg of Demerol." "Let's prep for lavage." "l need a catheter." "l got it." "Any heart sounds?" "Negative." "Give him more atropine." "A lot of gray matter here." "Oh, God." "is he salvageable?" "Call Neuro." "Get the saline and tube ready." "I'm not giving up yet." "Come on." "Wait!" "What are you doing?" "Relax." "They gave you an anesthetic so you won't be in pain." "Why are they cutting me?" "Listen to me." "My name is Carol." "I'll tell you what's happening." "They made a nick in your belly so they can fill your abdomen with fluid." "Once it's full, they'll watch as the fluid drains out." "If blood comes out, you have injuries and you'll need to have surgery." "What do you think?" "Call the O.R., tell them we're on our way." "You're going to surgery now." "Oh, God!" "Larry!" "Time of death, 9:33." "Oh, God." "Let's move." "I'll make sure we got a room." "Carol." "lt was me." "What was you?" "I was driving Larry's car." "It's my fault." "I killed him." "Oh, God, I killed him!" "The space shuttle." "Now there's a bright idea." "Let's spend 50 billion so six guys can sit in a tin can and test the effect of weightlessness on fruit flies." "ls that kid gonna make it?" "l think so." "One out of three." "What a waste." "When I see that, I think, "There but for the grace of God...."" "Tell me about it." "In high school, we'd race this guy's TR7 on River Road pin the speedometer at 1 20." "We'd climb those giant TV antennas up to the top." "Must've been 200, 300 feet." "You did that?" "Otto Jevitch." "His dad was a demolitions expert." "We'd steal dynamite and play chicken." "I don't believe you." "The worst thing Howie and I ever did was Chinese fire drills at the Velvet Freeze." "I guess you and Howie were born to be wild." "Did I miss something?" "Just being publicly ridiculed." "How about some coffee?" "Sure." "Hey, Doug." "John, glad you showed up." "This kid's elbow's the size of a grapefruit." "Sure, just give me one second." "Yeah." "I'll just go through my mail." "Sorry, Lydia." "Oh, don't be." "That's the best kiss I've experienced in months." "Find someone to cover you?" "No." "Keep trying." "Mom won't start supper till 7." "She's really looking forward to seeing you." "l'll try." "l gotta go, but..." "..." "I'll see you." "Bye." "All yours." "So what's your name?" "My name is John Carter." "You've grown awfully quiet, John Carter." "Oh, I see." "I had a friend once." "We would go to lunch, happy hours shopping." "Over drinks one night, I told her about myself." "She stood up, left the table and never spoke to me again." "I used to feel those things made me stronger more sure of who I was." "These days I spend three hours putting on my face before I dare go outside." "Plucking and waxing." "And even then, someone always notices." "I can see by the look in their eyes." "The disgust." "Maybe they're right." "Maybe I am disgusting." "Turn your head the other way, please." "Thank you." "Hey, Lydia!" "Hey, Al." "What you got?" "Guy needs to be cleared for booking." "He's bleeding all over my squad car." "Dr." "Ross, got a patient." "l'm not a "grownup" doctor." "We all know that, but there's no one else available." "What happened?" "He was attacked by a turkey." "A turkey?" "What's open?" "Trauma One." "Francis is an animal-rights nut." "Activist." "Whatever." "There's this Thanksgiving display in one of the malls." "Dried corn, straw, guys dressed like Pilgrims." "They also got this live, big mother of a turkey" "They were exploiting the bird." "It was disgusting." "So Francis decides to steal the bird." "To rescue it!" "You grabbed the bird, threw it in your car and took off." "That's stealing." "lt was being abused." "Now comes the good part." "During the getaway, the turkey attacks him." "It starts clawing and pecking at his head." "So what does Francis do?" "He breaks the bird's neck!" "And the upshot of it is, you guys get a fresh bird for your party." "Oh, my God!" "You better take that outside." "is that a Narragansett tom?" "It sure is!" "He's a big fella too." "I kind of doubt if Dietary will want to prepare it." "I'll do it. I used to pluck birds as a kid." "This one's a beaut." "He was listing all the symptoms of a major depression." "That explains a few things." "I know you've never liked Div, but please don't run him down in front of me." "Sorry." "It just hurts to see him like this." "I don't know what to do." "If he's depressed, he needs psychiatric help." "I don't want to back him into a corner." "Someone's gotta say something." "If he's that bad he shouldn't be treating patients." "Your concern for Div is touching." "Thanks for the advice." "l just think he should see someone." "l got that." "You should've seen the condition of his cage." "It was like a cell." "His water dish was dry." "That's no good." "People forget that we share the same biological heritage as every creature on the planet." "That first lizard who crawled out of the ooze is a distant cousin to us all." "I never thought about it." "You don't keep your cousin in a cage with no water." "You don't eat your family." "Oh, my God!" "Could you please shut the blind?" "Sure, Francis." "Are you okay?" "Doctor, can I tell you something?" "When I was under attack my most primitive fight-or-flight instinct kicked in and I was a beast!" "When I grabbed the bird's neck and heard it snap there was a part of me that secretly enjoyed it." "is your father still living?" "Yes, he is." "I didn't really know my dad until just a few years ago." "I hadn't seen him for ten years, when out of the blue he called." "Said he wanted to see me." "He had no idea." "So I put on a jade-green short-sleeved silk dress." "And that's how I answered the door." "Know what he said?" "He said, "Are you Henry's girlfriend?"" "And I said, "No, Dad." "It's me."" "And he said "You look just like your sister."" "Then he said he came to see me because he was dying." "Before he died, he said, "Henry you may wear a dress but you're still my son."" "I'm done." "You should stay here for about a half-hour to make sure there's no reaction to the antibiotics." "Dr. Greene." "Good morning, ma'am." "What kind of thread you using?" "4-0 absorbable sub-Q." "Nice apposition, well spaced." "Good job." "Thanks." "Bravo." "Thank God." "God?" "There is no God, lady." "When can I get the hell out of here?" "Very soon." "It took some doing but I talked the clinic into taking you back." "Who asked you?" "Your appointment is Tuesday." "I ain't going." "Mr. Luck if you don't go you'll come back here, and neither of us wants that." "Shove it!" "Excuse me?" "Are you deaf too?" "I said, shove it you little pinheaded puke!" "Excuse me. I'm trying to find my son." "What's his name?" "Andrew Bohlmeyer." "Andy." "Yes. ls he all right?" "He was taken to surgery." "They're removing his spleen." "Oh, my God!" "l'll take you up." "Please." "Edie!" "Andrea, I went by the house!" "l was out." "Where are they?" "Where's the other boy?" "Larry Parks?" "Are you Larry's mother?" "Yes." "Where is he?" "What?" "Mrs. Parks your son was brought in with injuries to his head" "Are you telling me he's dead?" "Yes, he is. I'm sorry." "I am not a baby, for God's sake." "Can't you just put it in my mouth?" "Hospital policy, Mr. Luck." "I'll be back in ten minutes." "Wait a minute." "How about a little privacy here?" "What's so funny?" "You never seen a guy get his temperature taken before?" "Andy...." "How you doing, honey?" "Tired." "Numb." "You're not in any pain?" "No." "The girl, is she okay?" "No, she's not." "How did it happen, honey?" "Larry ran a red light." "He was trying to beat it." "I told him to stop, but he said he could make it." "Oh, Andy." "How awful." "Sweetie." "Thank God you're all right." "I never said you were boring." "You implied it." "You're an extremely dynamic individual, especially in those glasses." "What's wrong with them?" "Nothing." "Going to surgery." "In college, every Friday night I'd go to the Rathskeller and drink lots of beer." "Pitchers!" "You're right. I've never done anything irresponsible." "lrresponsible is overrated." "l've never been arrested." "I've never spent money on something that I didn't need." "And I have never been to Bermuda with a horny saleslady." "It's the Bahamas, and I wouldn't go if she weren't paying." "She's paying?" "She pays for everything." "I feel like a kept man." "I have never been a kept man." "Dr. Greene!" "She came in with chest pain, collapsed in the waiting room." "How long have you been in pain?" "An hour. I was in the kitchen, cooking dinner and the pressure started here." "ls it a heart attack?" "l'm not sure." "Have you been sick?" "I was diagnosed with lupus last year." "She's been in remission." "Call Cardiology." "We need to get a consult." "Get an EKG, cardiac enzyme and a chest film." "Sir, you'll have to wait outside." "No!" "I want him here." "All right." "All right." "Here we go." "Sit down." "Lie back." "Just relax, breathe easy." "We're gonna take care of you." "He told you he was driving and you didn't tell anyone?" "Who am I supposed to tell?" "The police, for one." "Carol, the kid committed manslaughter." "He killed two people." "I'm not sure it's my place." "Well, you know how it is." "Patients think they're dying and tell us things they wouldn't tell their husbands or wives." "Or their priests." "This kid unburdened his soul to me." "I just don't feel right passing that on." "Mark." "You guys moonlighting as cardiologists?" "Gurunian and Bell are in surgery, Kayson's on his way." "Until he gets here, we're it." "Patient's 40, history of lupus, treated with prednisone." "Presented with chest pain, heart rate's 1 1 2, pulsus paradoxlus." "EKG shows an ST elevation." "Think there's an effusion?" "I do." "Sarah?" "Well, there's the silhouette sign." "Blood pressure's dropping." "She needs a centesis." "Ever done one?" "Lots of times." "She's unconscious." "Move her to Trauma." "We can't wait." "I'll need an 1 8-gauge PC needle and clip." "What's happening?" "There's a thin sack around the heart called the pericardium." "Your wife's is filling with fluid, so the heart can't beat properly." "We'll insert a needle and drain the fluid" "Stick a needle in her heart?" "Near her heart." "You know, Sarah I've never done one of these procedures and since you've done a lot" "You want to do it?" "Do it. I'll back you up." "Hey." "That's funny." "I was just thinking about you." "Pleasant thoughts?" "Very pleasant." "Have a seat." "Actually I feel like I owe you an apology." "I know that lately I've been difficult, to put it mildly." "I'm sorry if I've embarrassed you." "You haven't embarrassed me." "I'm worried about you." "Well, I've been pretty depressed." "Have you thought about talking to someone?" "A therapist?" "Things are starting to fall into place." "I wouldn't worry too much." "Are we still on for dinner?" "With your sister and her new beau?" "I wouldn't miss it." "Maybe we can talk afterwards." "I'd like that." "Mrs. Parks?" "Can I get you anything?" "Call you a ride?" "What?" "No. lf l..." "...could just sit down." "Sure." "Sure." "I just saw my son." "He was so cold." "I looked at his face and all I wanted to do was to slap him." "To hit him and to say "You stupid boy!" "How could you do this to yourself?" "That poor girl." "How could you leave me?"" "Oh, my God!" "What's wrong with me?" "You seen my patient?" "Middle-aged...." "She-male?" "Must've gone to the ladies room." "Insert the needle at about 45 degrees, gently aspirating as you go." "When you reach the pericardium, you'll draw fluid." "The EKG will let you know if you touch the heart." "I gotta be getting close." "Anything?" "No." "Pull back!" "You've hit heart muscle." "What's going on?" "Nothing's coming out." "The pericardium must be infected." "The fluid's too thick for the needle." "She's fibrillating." "Charging." "Ready." "Clear!" "Got a pulse." "Let's crack her." "Crack her and morbidity increases greatly." "If we don't release the pressure, she could die." "Do a window." "Make an 8-centimeter cut at the xiphoid." "Do it now." "Okay." "Open the diaphragm." "Cut out a window of pericardium." "Two inches." "Not too big or her heart will jump out." "You can do it." "Do it." "That's it." "Keep going." "Keep going." "That's it." "Suction." "Okay, here it comes." "We got fluid." "We got a beat." "Oh, man." "Pressure's back." "Stitch around the tube. I think you can take it from here." "Andy?" "How are you?" "I'm okay." "Police talk to you yet?" "They will." "Andy I heard what you told your mother." "And I understand why." "You're in a lot of pain." "You don't want to bring on more." "is it fair to let Larry's mother believe he killed that girl?" "I know you feel guilty, but it's only gonna get worse." "I know." "I've kept things from people." "It makes you hate yourself." "It makes it hard to live with yourself." "Ever kill anyone before?" "No." "But I've done things to hurt people." "People close to me." "And you told them?" "Not everything, no." "It's not so easy." "is it?" "What's going on?" "Jumper on the roof." "Some lady." "Looks like she's gonna go." "Oh, God!" "Excuse me." "She's my patient." "Miss Carleton!" "Please." "Please." "Don't come any closer." "Okay." "Okay." "Miss Carleton, I know you're feeling terrible right now but there's people in the hospital that can help you." "I can't pass for a woman anymore." "That's all I've ever wanted to be." "Could you just look at me?" "Just look at me and talk to me." "We could talk about it." "Carter." "Oh, thank God!" "Like to introduce me to your friend?" "Miss Carleton there's a doctor here who can help you." "is it okay if he talks-- No!" "Don't!" "Oh, God!" "That looks good." "This is really good" "Party time!" "Hey, Haleh, pass the yams, please." "It's a buffet." "Get your own yams." "You heard about the" "Yeah, awful." "Any luck getting off?" "No." "Can we take a walk?" "Sure." "Ready?" "Ready as I'll ever be." "Here's your ticket." "Oh, my God!" "These are coach." "Hold on." "Oh, to be a kept man." "Not one complaint out of you." "In an hour you'll be at the table with your wife your daughter and your family all around." "And I'm gonna be at 30,000 feet sucking down vodka gimlets with a woman who dresses me." "You have no idea how lucky you are." "If you don't want to go, don't go." "A little late for that." "l don't know." "Here she comes." "All fixed." "The limo's waiting." "Well, Happy Thanksgiving." "Okay." "Happy Thanksgiving." "Bye." "So is this good news or bad?" "Oh, boy." "I need to talk to you about something." "What?" "During the time that we've been going out I slept with Doug Ross." "When?" "Last winter." "Before you took the pills?" "Yeah." "Since then?" "No." "But two weeks ago he kissed me and I let him." "Tag, please." "Just go to hell, okay?" "Just go to hell!" "Am I supposed to sit back and smile while you screw your old boyfriend?" "What more do you want from me?" "I've been patient." "I've been faithful." "Should I treat you like garbage, like Doug?" "No." "I want you." "Why would you tell me this?" "Because I've been dishonest, and I need you to know." "Okay, great." "Now I know, okay?" "I know!" "What am I supposed to do now, okay?" "Tag." "Hey, Sarah." "Yeah?" "The heart lady's doing fine." "She'll be with her family tomorrow." "Good." "You start the fellowship next week?" "l leave tomorrow." "Yeah." "l'm sure you'll be just great." "Probably." "See you." "Sarah?" "I...." "Thanks, you know for letting me do the procedure and backing me up when things got crazy today." "This is a teaching hospital." "Helping those under you looking out for each other, that's what it's supposed to be about." "Yeah." "It was a great save." "I'll see you in the spring." "Carter if anybody's responsible, it's me." "She came in here because she crashed her car into a bridge." "I should've recognized that as a suicide attempt but I didn't." "So next time, we'll both be more attentive." "Come on, Carter." "Let's go." "What?" "My family's holding dinner until 7:30." "If we hurry, we'll catch the prayer." "Thank you, Dr. Benton." "I just want to be alone." "You promised my mother, didn't you?" "You're gonna back out?" "Come on." "Grab your coat." "Let's go." "Let's go, Carter." "Come and get it!" "Ronnie, come on." "Turn off the damn TV." "l guess we shouldn't wait for Div." "You snooze, you lose. I'm starving." "Chloe, how long did you cook this turkey?" "I don't know." "A couple hours." "A turkey this size needs at least six hours." "Try some. lt tastes good." "It's teeming with bacteria." "I'll put it back." "Maybe we can eat at ten." "Maybe Div'll be here by then." "Wait." "You gotta be kidding." "You can't read a cookbook?" "Why don't you shut up?" "All you did was watch TV." "That's what I do on Thanksgiving." "That is Thanksgiving." "Besides, who bought the groceries?" "Who bought the beer?" "With my money!" "Shut up!" "You act like two-year-olds." "Come on."