"Thank you for your patience." "Your call is important to us." "We will be with you shortly." "Thank you for your patience." "Your call is important to us." "We will be with you shortly." "Thank you for your patience." "Your call is important to us." "We will be with you shortly." "Thank you for your patience." "Your call is important to us." "We will be with you shortly." "Mrs. Greenslade, thank you for waiting." "I've consulted with my manager" "Now if you'll just stay on the phone for a moment and talk to me." "Just talk to me." "Of course." "I'm not even clear" " I mean, I don't actually understand what it is I'm trying to order." "Is wireless the same as Wi-Fi?" "And what do either of them have to do with broadband?" "Mrs. Greenslade, since the account is not in your name, before we can make any changes, we need to verify details with the account holder." "Can I please speak to the account holder?" "What?" "I'm asking if I can talk to the account holder." "Before we can make any changes" "You can't talk to him, no." "He's dead." "He died of a heart attack." "There's only me." "Mrs. Greenslade, since the account is not in your name" "Lord Justice Walton requests the pleasure of our company." " Had you forgotten?" " I hate retirement parties." "Crap cheese, crap wine." "Endless speeches." "Why do people do that?" "Nobody" " Nobody ever said about a retirement party, you know," "Well, this is great." "I can't wait to have one of my own." "it'll be yours one day." "One day very soon." "You've been saying that for years." "It was often said of Stancombe that his bark was worse than his bite." "But as the recipient of both," "I can testify to the fact that neither actually required surgery." "His relationship with all his pupils... was founded on respect." "We respected him, and he respected that." "Indeed, to this day, I recall his response... to the unwelcome news that I would trans" "praecipitium a tergo lupi." "This is the day." "Graham?" "This is the day." "And there's an unlimited range of leisure opportunities... just a stone's throw away." "So, as I say, what you're looking at here is very competitively priced." "You won't see better for your Grey Pound." "Another little feature- not necessarily right now, give it a few years- rails on the wall to help you get around." "And over here, a panic button." "In case of a sudden fall, brings the warden running." "What if we fell somewhere else?" "Sorry?" "It's just we might not manage to plan our sudden fall... in the exact corner where the button is." "Yeah, but" "And would it be possible to have the rail going through the middle of the room" "Darling. to help us get across, as well as around." "Um, c-c-could we have a moment, please?" "Thank you." "Yeah." "Thank you so much." "Darling" "Thirty years in the civil service, and this is all we can afford." "W-W-Would it help if I apologize again?" "No." "But try it anyway." "Could Dr. MacKenzie please make his way to Theater 7." "Dr. MacKenzie to Theater 7." "Young lady, I want a cup of tea." "And I want it now." "The trolley will be along shortly." "How hard do you have to fall to get proper attention?" "I've been lying here for hours." "Not a single doctor has come to see me." "Now that's not quite true, is it, Mrs. Donnelly?" "A doctor did try and examine you, and you sent him away." "What, that one?" "He can wash all he likes." "That color's not coming out." "I want an English doctor." "Oh, an English doctor." "Why didn't you say so?" "I'll get one right away." "Thank you." "Mrs. Donnelly, this is Dr. Ghujarapartidar." "Notes, please." "j Now here we go with the flow of the girls you know j" "J The ones seen in Argentina and Mexico JJ" "And after that, I worked as a systems analyst for a few years, but I just found it so dull." "What I really wanted was to do something more creative that matched" "Um, I'm sorry." "Um, on the form, they asked for our age bracket... and the age we wanted to meet." "And in both cases, I ticked 25 to 39." "That's right." "So did I." "Anyway, don't stop." "Uh- Something more creative." "How old are you?" "Early 40s." "And, you know, my interests are travel, theater" "Do you mean you were born in the early '40s?" "Judy, I know what you're asking." "It'S Judith." "Judith." "Trust me." "I've still got it." "Just can't ind anyone that wants it." "Hi." "I'm Norman." "This is crazy." "You're crazy." "You can't just up and leave like this." "And yet, if you watch me, that's exactly what you'll see happen." "What's going on?" "Your mother's lost it." " My mother never had it." " You talk to her." "She doesn't listen to me." "Nobody listens to you." "I still don't understand what's going on." "I just asked her to babysit, and now she says she's leaving." "But you love babysitting." "I loved it last night." "We had pizza and stayed up late." " And the night before?" " We had Chinese and stayed up late." "If you don't go, tonight we could do a curry." "It's tempting, darlings, but you know I have to leave." "We know." "Being here is stopping her finding a husband." "Another one?" "Bye, Granny." "Bye, Granny." "Don't let the buggers get you down." "How many husbands have you had anyway?" " Including my own?" " Mother." "Mother." "Mother!" "Thank you, yes." "Right." "Name the place, darlin'." "Where you going?" "I've absolutely no idea." "There's no other way." "There just isn't." "Harold told us this three months ago." "And I'm afraid matters have only got worse." "We can't wait any longer." "We need to put this flat on the market and at least start paying off Dad's debts." "I've talked it through with Polly and the boys." "Of course, we all agreed." "Ma will come and live with us." "I think that's best, Evelyn." "And it's what Hugh would have wanted." "Good." "Well, that's settled." "End of discussion." "Oh!" "That's just what your father used to say" " Ma." "When there'd never been any discussion at all." "I want to look after things for you." "What, like he did for 40 years?" "Look how that turned out." "How on earth do we know what Hugh would have wanted?" "And would he have seen Ht to tell us anyway?" "Obviously, the flat's got to be sold." "And you're very kind, and dear Polly." "But I shan't be coming to live with you." "You need a new hip, Mrs. Donnelly." "It's not a difficult operation." "That's easy for you to say." "You're not having it." "Regardless." "You do need a new hip." " I'm not gettin' it from you." " Not me personally, no." " No, none of your lot." " I see." "When do I have the operation?" "I'm afraid you'll be on the waiting list for at least six months." "At my age, I can't plan that far ahead." "I don't even buy green bananas." "There is another way." "Our hospital trust is funding a pilot scheme... that will enable us to outsource you to another hospital... where they can perform the procedure almost immediately... and at a fraction of the cost." "Is it local?" "They cover the cost of the flight out apparently." "When did you get a computer?" "How far along is the progress bar?" "That thing at the top." "It tells you" " I know what it is, Ma." "What are you showing me anyway?" "Come and spend your autumn years in an Indian palace... with the sophistication of an english country manor:" "Tucked away on the outskirts of Juipur, and graced wiih breathtaking surroundings" "" Lofty terraces, open courtyards, domes, arches... and canopied balconies abound with opulent comfort." "Indeed, the entire buildihg exudes historical ambience... and transports one back in time to the proud tradition of the Rej." "Is that good?" "It is." "It is." "Very good." "Thirty-six years, four months since the day we were called to the bar, and you've never once talked about India." "Do you want any of these books?" "You might be needing them again." " Mrs. Megson." " Sir?" "I want you to have this." "Are you sure?" "Oh, absolutely." "Th-There's a little crack there just on the bottom, but I think you know something about that already." "I used to live there... a long time ago." "There won't be any golf courses." "Well, that's just as well." "I can't afford the green fees." "But a retirement home?" "It's a luxury development... where all the residents are in their golden years." "Like the Costa Brava?" "Yeah, but with more elephants." "You know who'll be there" " Indians." "Loads of them." "Brown faces and black hearts." "Reeking of curry." "And you never see one on their own, do you?" "I mean, they always- they move in packs." "Makes it easier to rob you blind, cut your throat." "You know what?" "You can wheel yourself from here." "You're supposed to take me to my flat." "My wife's from Mumbai." "Well, don't blame me, mate." "You married her." "My wife's from Mumbai." "Has anyone thought about what happens when you get to the other end?" "They said somebody's going to meet us in Jaipur." "How are we going to know you're all right?" "Well, I'll call." "They do have phones there, you know." "Or you can read my blog." "Your what?" "On the lnterweb." "Just log in whenever you like and read my news." "Well, I hope the first item will be announcing your return." "I don't suppose they'll be paying for the journey back." "Look, before I go, I wonder, could you say one thing that's supportive?" "I've never done anything like this in the whole of my life." "You've never done anything at all without Dad." "I don't think you'll be able to cope." "Well, let's just find out, shall we?" "And the connecting flight to Jaipur is first class too?" "That's right." "I tell you. it's tough to get upgraded nowadays." "I had to flirt so hard with the travel agent, it was practically phone sex." "Oh." "Well, this is my lucky day." "Sir." "We'd like to take a look in this bag, madam, if you don't mind." "What have you got in here anyway?" "It's just PG Tips." "And some brown sauce." "Thirty-one packets of chocolate Hobnobs." "That's pickled onions and, yeah, pickled eggs." "And that's just pickles." "Pickles." " No liquids on the plane." " What's that mean?" "It means you can't take the pickled onions... or the pickled eggs." "The pickles fine." "Oh!" "Obviously, one has read one's Kipling, but we view this as an opportunity to explore another culture, as well as making new friends." "And a High Court judge is just the class of guest one was hoping for." "isn't it, Douglas?" "Sorry?" "And, um, is this your first time in India?" "Yes." "You don't look like an experienced traveler." "Oh, I'm not." "But one has read one's guidebooks." "It should be there." "No." "Oh." "Oh." "Hi." "Hello." "We haven't met." "Norman Cousins." "Madge Hardcastle." "A pleasure." "Play your cards right, and it could be." "Look." "My chair." "What?" "Oh, yes, yes." "Hang on." "May I have your attention, please ?" "We regret to announce cancellation of Flight 105 to Jaipur, owing to bad weather at the destination.." "We apologize for any inconvenience caused" "Right." "Of course it's a good idea." "Who can one trust if not a High Court judge?" "I suppose this way we see more of the country." "If anyone asks, say you're my mother." "I don't want people to think we're together." "In your dreams." "Douglas, these are not words that often pass my lips, but you may actually be right." "This country seems rather more civilized than one originally thought." "Okay." "Thank you." "The bus" " The bus will take us to the center of the town, and then we can get tuk-tuks the rest of the way." "What did he say?" "So it's down there." "Yeah, it's down there." "Down here." "The yellow one." "That one." "But look at the bus!" "There's not enough room!" "First rule of India- There's always room."" "There we are." "Ah." "Sorry." "In you go." "What larks, Pip!" "Well, let's hope so." "Oh!" "Oh!" "I'm really loving this." "Oh." "Thank you." "Are you insane?" "Avoid all food not from a reputable vendor." "It'll be washed in impure water." "It's just a sandwich." "Oh, marvelous." "Then I'll have ham, cheese and streptococcus." "Or perhaps bacteria, lettuce and tomato." "Huh." "Would you like some of this?" "I believe it's called aloo ka paratha." "No, if I can't pronounce it, I don't want to eat it." "How long since you've been here?" "Forty years." "Oh." "That's as long as I was married." "My husband died recently." "Oh, I'm sorry." "Do you think we'll be all right?" "God, don't ask me." "I'm more scared than you are." "Oh." "No." "It's going to be extraordinary." "What exactly is a tuk-tuk?" "Oh, look!" "What's that?" "Look!" "Oh!" "Ah!" "Is this it?" "Well" "Here!" "Watch it!" "Sorry." "Welcome to The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel!" "Oh!" "There's an Indian in there." "Ah." "This will do." "Bird in room." "This is a building of the utmost character, which means that perhaps not everything will function in the way you expect it to." "But, as the manager... and chief executive supervising officer of this Marigold Hotel," "I can tell you with great pride that the building has stood for centuries... and will continue to stand for many more in 100% shipshape condition." "Please follow me, carefully avoiding that naughty stone there." "Around this corner, leading us most successfully all the way to- your bedroom." "Where?" "Here." "In here." "My dear man, rooms have doors." "What you're showing me here is an alcove." "A door is coming soon, most definitely." "How soon?" "Let us not concern ourselves with details, Mrs. Hardcastle." "Rather than speaking of doors, we should instead take pleasure in the freedom to roam." "Does your room have a door?" "A most effective one." "Good." "Then that's where I'll be staying." "You will be coming to the hospital... once you he satisfactorily recovered from your journey." "The operation requires a stay of five days, and it is done under general anesthesia." "A hip replacement usually takes only two hours." "Your surgeon will remove the top end of the thighbone... and insert an artificial bone instead." "A most routine procedure." "Have you got a marker pen on you?" "Why?" "I want to mark it." "I don't want you to do the wrong hip." "I want to stay at the other hotel, the one that's in the brochure." "Mrs. Ainslie, prepare to be amazed." "This is that very building, madam." "You Photoshopped it!" "No." "I have offered a vision of the future." "Of course, I'd hoped that by now it would be the present." "But, you know, in India, we have a saying" "Everything will be all right in the end." "So if it is not all right, it is not yet the end." "What will start to make it all right is if you'll give us a refund." "Of course." "Of course." "If that is what you desire, then you must have it." "Absolutely no problem." "I'll refund you completely." "You will?" "Most definitely, madam." "Straightaway?" "I most definitely will." "Straightaway in three months, okay?" "Um, have you tried, um, jiggling it about a bit?" "Yes, I did that." "Did you kind of bang it lightly on the desk a few times?" "Yes, I did that too." "Okay." "Um" "Right." "How do you come to be in India?" "Oh, uh" " Oh." "I invested our- well, my retirement money... in our daughter's Internet company." "She assured me that as soon as the start-up actually, uh, started up... and the conversion from virtual to actual became sufficiently viable, then she'd be able to pay it all back." "I'm not sure I understand what most of those words mean." "Well, it turns out neither did she." "Ah." "There you are." "Good as new." "Really?" "No, of course not." "Now, would you like me to, um, not fix that chair?" "Because I could almost certainly do that as well." "How long have I waited for this moment... to present to you, in honor of your arrival, a special Welcome British roast for you all." "Cooked lovingly by myself... and my most loyalist helper and friend, Young Wasim." " Roast what?" " A wonderful taste of Blighty." "Roast what?" "Roast goat curry." "Gentle friends, you have found your way to this place, bequeathed to me by my beloved father, that I have raised from the ruins of his broken dreams... and renamed The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel... for the Elderly and Beautiful." "Yes." "I use these words most deliberately." "For you have all heard the chimes at midnight, and long in tooth have you become." "Who knows how many days you have left?" "But we are most honored that you have chosen to spend that time with us." "Please" "Oh!" "What's he got?" "Douglas, do something." "Let me through, please." "My brother is a doctor." "Sorry, please." "This man is dead." "Oh, my God!" "Please, we must cover his face." "We should preserve his dignity at this terrible moment." "I'm sorry, buddy." " He coughed." "I saw him cough." " He moved." "He's alive." "Did" " Did I nod Off?" "All is right." "He didn't die." "I was looking forward to that meal." "It's hell." "I was frightened." "I'm in hell." "Marigold Hotel, Jaipur." "Day nine." "Old habits die easier than we think, and new ones form." "No longer do I reach out in the morning for Radio 4." "My news comes instead from the Jaipur Herald." "Soon, I might even grow accustomed to the storm of car horns and vendors." "One moment." "The carburetor, sir." "Carburetor is broken." "Can there be anywhere else in the world... tha!" "is such an assault on the senses?" "Those who know the country of old just go about their business." "But nothing can prepare the uninitiated.." "for this riot of noise and color, for the heat, the motion, the perpetual teeming crowds." "Sonny is conducting his own personal assault on our senses... with a flow of exotic dishes he demands daily from the kitchen." "Mooli moong dal, bagara baingan, banjara gosht, paneer methi chaman, mutton vindaloo." "Initially, you're overwhelmed." "But gradually, you realize it's like a wave." "Resist and you'll be knocked over." "Mrs. Donnelly!" "Dive into it, and you'll swim out the other side." "Excuse me." "I wonder, could you direct me to this address?" "No more." "No more." "I don't have any more." "I haven't got any more." "This is a new and different world." "The challenge is to cope with it." "And not just cope, but thrive." "Graham was talking about this marvelous temple." "I thought you might want to come with me." "I'm your wife." "Have we met?" "Would you really rather stay here all day?" "Yes, given the alternative." "When I walk out in the morning, all the street kids smile at me." "That's 'cause you give them money." "Um, okay." "I'll go on my own." " This can't be right, surely." " I am thinking so, saab." "There used to be houses all along there." "These were homes." "I can take you some other place?" "No." "No, no, no." "No." "That will be all for now." "Thank you." "Here." "Thank you very much." "Thank you, sir." "Um, excuse me." "Yeah?" " Uh, there used to be houses here." " All knocked down." "What about the people, the families?" "They moved to a different place." "Uh, don't- don't grip it so tightly with your right hand." "The bat." "Yes, it's just there for guidance." "You keep your left elbow high... so you play through the ball." "Thank you." "Okay." "You're ready to go home, Mrs. Donnelly." "That's not my home." "I want to go back to England." "As soon as you can stand up and walk onto the plane, you can." "Until then, I will assist in your recuperation." "How is the hip feeling?" "They must have got lucky." "It's strange." "The more operations they perform, the luckier they get." "Oh." "I didn't realize." "Um, sorry." "Oh!" "Oh, I'm so sorry." "I'm dreadfully sorry." "Yes?" "Sorry." "I'm just looking for this address." "Yes." "Do you understand?" "Could you help me find this place?" "Yes." "Is that, yes, you do understand or, yes, you could help me?" "Yes." "Yes." "Oh." "Well, let's just go with both, shall we?" "Yes." "Oh!" "Yes." "Give me the ball." "I can take him." "Down is where you are going, uncle." "You do your worst." "Come on, Sanjay." "You can do it." "Come on, Sanjay." "I felt the need, the need for speed." "Yes!" "Are you all right, uncle?" "Yes." "Yes, I'm fine." "Oh." "We do appreciate your custom, which is very important to us." "And can I draw your attention to our special new" "Are you sure I can't offer you something?" "We have some, uh, English breakfast tea." "Building tea, as you call it." "A builder's tea?" "Builder's tea." "No, thank you." "I'm fine." "So, tell me." "How can I help you?" "I don't think you can." "I'm sorry." "I shouldn't have come." "No, wait." "It's just that I saw your advertisement in the local newspaper, and it specifically mentioned the ability to talk to older people." "But this wasn't what I imagined." " You came for a job?" " I'm sorry." "I've wasted your time." "Look, everyone working here is a graduate from a good university." "This is a place for ambitious people, young people." "Yes, I see that now." "I'm sorry." "No." "Please, sit down." "Sit down." "Please." "So it is really builder's tea?" "Yes." "We dunk biscuits into it." "You dunk?" "Well, it means lowering the biscuit into the tea... and letting it soak in there... and trying to calculate the exact moment before the biscuit dissolves... when you can whip it up into your mouth... and enjoy the blissful union of biscuit and tea combined." "It is more relaxing than it sounds." "Perhaps you can help us after all." "I thought you weren't coming." "Have I ever let you down?" "Um- Don't answer that." "I have to go." "Leave this place." "Come to work for me." "You can't afford me." "I can't afford anything." "I miss you." "Am I coming round tonight?" "Uh, let's meet somewhere else." "I will rent a hotel room." "Sonny, you own a hotel." "It has many rooms." "Some of which are now occupied with actual real guests." "Paying guests?" "Why must you nitpick?" "It is not an attractive quality." "Sunaina." "Hello, Jay." "Sonny boy." "Don't call me that." "If you're gonna mess around with my sister, don't do it in public." "Let's go." "Good evening, Your Honor." "Ah, good evening, Mrs. Ainslie." "You have a good day?" "What did you get up to?" "Well, I started in my bedroom, where I spent a happy couple of hours giving all the cockroaches names." "And then, after a lunch that will long have a place in my heartburn," "I came out here and stared blindly at a book, waiting for someone- anyone- to rescue me." "And how glad I am it was you." "Why would you not go out?" "There's so much to see." "All life is here, Mrs. Ainslie." "I tell you." "Oh, I could have a word with the chef if you like." "Perhaps some grilled chicken and plain rice?" "That would be much appreciated." "All right." "Good evening." "Good evening." "Please." "Please, sit down." "Oh." "Thank you." "I trust you had a good day." "I'd rather hear about yours." "I got a job- my first ever." "I'm going to be a sort of cultural adviser." "A role I'm sure you'll perform with great distinction." "Perhaps you wouldn't mind keeping that to yourself." "Well, I-I-I'm flattered you told me about it." "Good evening, the Ainslies." "Did you have a good day?" "Spectacular actually." "I went to the temple you told me about, a place of meditation and peace." "It was quite stunning." "So spiritual, I bet you never noticed the smell of elephant dung." "No elephants, sadly." "I thought I might see you there." "Where did you get to instead?" "Yes, where do you get to every day?" "Well, I-I've just been telling Mrs. Greenslade all about it." "I'm sure she wouldn't mind hearing it again." "Oh, I talked to the chef for you." "Absolutely no problem." "Did you hear that, Douglas?" "Plain grilled food." "Manna from heaven." "I don't have to have it too, do I?" "I can't thank you enough." "You really should see this temple." "Oh, I'd like to very much." "But maybe take a clothes-peg for your nose." "Good night." "Good night." "Um, Mrs. Greenslade?" "Evelyn." "Would you mind if I showed you something?" "I grew up here, just a short drive away." "It was a big house." "We had servants." "Oh, we knew their wives and children, and... one of the boys, uh, Manoj" "Oh." "He, um- He became my friend." "And, uh, we played lots of cricket together, and" "Well, we played everything together, and-and it stayed like that for a few years." "And then, um" "And then one night, it, uh- it became something else." "We had a few months together." "We had that." "And, um" " And then there was a weekend in Udaipur... where... we were sitting by a lake and watching the sun go down." "And, uh, I remember thinking that I-I would never be this happy again." "And" " And I was right." "Because, suddenly, it was over." "We'd fallen asleep, and they found us." "Well, it was bad enough for me." "But I knew who I was, and I think my family guessed." "But for- for Manoj, the- the disgrace was absolute." "His father was fired." "His family was sent away, all of them." "And, uh, well, I don't know what I could have done." "But it should have been more than nothing." "I just- I just let it happen." "I didn't put up any kind of a fight." "I" "And then, um" "Then I went back to England, to-to-to university." "And, uh, I always said, you know, I'm going to go back." "I shall go back." "And I never did." "Until now." "Until now." "And now I think" "What if I'm the last person in the world that he wants to see?" "Do you want to see him?" "Yes." "Yes, yes." "Then you must." "So now that we are fully operational, Mr. Maruthi, it is clear that, with a small injection of funds for the phase two development," "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel can rise like a phoenix... to its previous state of glory." "And, look, when I say small injection," "I mean small in the sense of, uh, medium-sized." " Possibly larger." " Well, this hotel was never glorious." "Just the phoenix part then." "How many rooms will there be?" "Many." "Mmm." "How many?" "A great amount." "Plenty of rooms." "No question." "I'm not a details man, Mr. Maruthi." "Nor was your father." "Mr. Maruthi, I present to you one of our beloved guests." "Dear Mrs. Donnelly, please can you describe to us in as much detail as you desire... your experience of the ambience and atmosphere... of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel." "Words fail me." "Ah, the English wit we love so greatly." "Thank you, madam." "See, the wheel is spinning, but, you know, the hamster is dead." " Mummyji, what are you doing here?" " You called." "I came." "No, I couldn't have called." "The phones don't work." "That's why I came." " Wait!" "Mummyji, this is my office!" " Who is that man out there?" "The contents of that desk are mine." "Do not open the drawers." "I must insist that you do not open the drawers." "Tell me." "Why have you come?" "Do I need a reason to visit my favorite son?" "No." "He's in his mansion in Delhi." "All right." "My second favorite." "He went to Canada to make his fortune." " And make it, he did." " As I will make mine!" "I have a dream, Mummyji." "A most brilliant one." "To outsource old age." "And it is not just for the British." "There are many other countries where they don't like old people too." "Sonny, your brothers own one-third of this hotel each." "They're also entitled to one-third of the profits, no?" "Success does not happen overnight, Mummyji." "This is blue-sky thinking, and it requires long-term strategy and-and-and patience." "How is your girlfriend?" "I look forward to you meeting her." "And I look forward to your meeting the girl you're going to marry." "She comes from a very good family in Delhi, beta, a very good family." "I can marry as I choose, Mummyji." "I don't need anyone's permission." "I presume it is your girlfriend who tills your head with this nonsense, huh?" "A very good reason not to marry her." "What if I love her?" "An even better reason." "Now go and get Young Wasim to come and get my luggage from the car." "He cannot carry." "He has a dicky back." "Wait." "Your luggage?" "How long are you staying?" "As long as it takes." "Dear, you won't get anywhere sweeping like that." "I was in service for years." "Looked after a lovely house." "Kept it spotless." "You need to put more pressure on the brush." "She won't speak English." "She's what they used to call an untouchable." "To a good Hindu, even her shadow is polluted." "Namaste" "Where do you go every day?" "Is it a woman?" "Go for a curry?" "Have a bit of afters?" "No, no, no." "I don't think so." "I'm, um- rm gay. uh" "Though nowadays, more in theory than in practice." "But I-I-I'll see you later." "The Viceroy Club was opened by the great Lord Kitchener himself, and many of its fixtures have remained unchanged since then." "Yes, I see that." "Perhaps you could tell me a little about the clientele." "Any maharajas, wealthy widowed landowners?" "It is not the policy of this club to divulge details of our members, madam." " Good morning, Your Excellency." " Very good morning." "Where do I sign up?" "The admission fee is 120,000 rupees, and, thereafter, it will be 15,000 rupees each month." "I wonder if I might get a little discount, owing to my status." "Your status, madam?" "Yes." "One was rather hoping to fly under the radar, but one is a member of the royal family." "Which member, madam?" "I'm Princess Margaret." "It is most certainly an honor to meet you, madam." "And may I say how well you look, especially taking into account that you died nine years ago." "Your real name please, madam, and 120,000 rupees." "You know where he goes." "I know you know, but you won't tell me." "I can get Hobnobs out here, you know." "I know a way." "As many as you like." "Milk or plain." "Public records office." "My mother doesn't want us to be married." "She hasn't met me yet." "She doesn't need to meet you." "She knows you're not from Delhi, that you have no family money, and you work in a call center." "You're part of a modern India she cannot welcome." "Then you must tell her what you want." "I'm trying." "Try harder." "Do you love me, Sonny?" "My feelings for you cannot be reduced to a single word." "It's a nice word." "People like hearing it." "You know, it will be easier to talk to my mother when the hotel is a success." "And what if it isn't?" "Everything will be all right in the end." "And if it is not all right, then it is not yet the end." "Sonny!" "It will succeed." "It has to." "Because then you can stand up to your family?" "Because then I can stand next to you." "Are you all right, auntie?" "Uh, yes." "I'm about to make the first public speech of my life." "Imagine them naked." "Sorry?" "It's the way not to be scared when speaking in public." "You imagine people naked." "Well, I'm afraid I gave that up several years ago." "Let's see." "Oh, dear." "Excuse me." "Would there be any wealthy single men in this evening?" "Uh, there is one." "Perhaps you could seat me next to him." "This way, madam." "His Royal Highness, Prince Michael of Kent." "I'll have that back." "Thank you very much." "Ready?" "Yes." " Ring me up." " Ring you up" "As you would." "You know, dial my number." "It's ringing." "Hello." "Good morning, madam." "And how are you today?" "Oh, no." "That won't do for a start." "That's much too nursie." "I feel as if I'm on my deathbed." "If I could just take a few moments of your time to tell you about" "How long will you actually take?" "Twelve minutes." "Then you've lied to me already." "No, I can't talk to you." "I'm watching TV." "Why does she need 12 minutes?" "Well, we believe the longer we keep our customers on the phone, the more receptive they'll be to our message." "It's my favorite program." "Yes, but I really think if you heard some of our special" "No, no." "Don't talk like a robot." "Now just talk to me." "You've heard I'm watching TV." " What are you watching?" " Oh, a marvelous program... where a chap talks to a panel of young women... whose boyfriends have all slept with their mothers." "Well, the girlfriends' mothers, I mean, not" "Although" "Anyway, the boys have come on, and everybody's fighting." "It sounds amazing." "Hang up right now." " I'm Sunaina." " Good." "Now that's very good." "Evelyn." "Evelyn." "Now can I speak to you about our special offers?" "Still too soon." "I obviously want to talk." "Is your husband watching with you, Evelyn?" "No." "No, he died." "Um, perhaps you" "You know, I've actually had a version of this call." "A little while ago, I talked to someone who was so constricted by the scripts, well, sales agenda, that she spoke without a trace of humanity." "As if she hadn't realized that..." "I was going completely to pieces at the end of the phone." "You must miss him very much." "Now, sympathy's fine." "But be more optimistic." "Um, but, you know, sometimes I find when one door closes" "The rest of them stay shut as well." "No, you're right." "Of course you're right." "It's a new beginning." "Now what do you want to talk to me about?" "There." "Three minutes?" "Well, either I've saved you nine, or I've talked myself out of a job." "I still think you're cramping my style." "Oh, please." "You have no style to cramp." "That lady at the bar keeps looking at me." "As one would something in a museum." "Why must you mock?" "I just want to feel young again." "To feel needed as much as I need, if only for one night." "One wonderful night." "Tell me you don't know how that feels." "Give me a minute and then come and join me." "Rejected again." "Many years ago that man over there gave me the most extraordinary night of my life." "To describe his bedroom skill as technique would" " Those drinks not ready yet?" " They say patience is passion tamed." " I'm Madge." " Carol." "And this is Norman." "How do you do?" "Carol." "As in Christmas." " I suppose." " Great." "So what brings you to Jaipur, Carol?" "Yes, Carol." "What, uh- What brings you to Jaipur?" "Actually, I've lived here all my life." "My father worked for the foreign office." " You're very Ht." " Beg your pardon?" " Oh, God." " You look like you keep yourself in good shape, physically." "Well" " I did join a gym last year." "It cost a fortune, and I didn't get any fitter." "Apparently, you actually have to go." "Ah!" "So, um, what do you do, Norman?" " Me?" " Yes." "Norman's in business." "Well, I" " Yes." " What business?" " You tell her." "Import-export." "Although nowadays, there's rather more easier than im." " If you know what I mean." " No, I'm afraid I don't." "I have to go and splash some water on my face." "Please, God, I drown in it." "Well, look." "It's been lovely chatting." "No, it hasn't." "No, it hasn't." "But I really have to go." "Look, Carol, Carol." "Can we drop all this pretense?" "Start again?" "I'm not charming." "I'm not good at repartee." "And" "My name's Norman, and I'm lonely." "My name's Carol." "So am I." "Day 22." "Like Darwin's finches, we are slowly adapting to our environment." "And when one does adapt, my God, the riches that are available." "There is no past that we can bring back by longing for it." "Only a present that builds and creates itself as the past withdraws." "Didn't sleep a wink last night." "The tap in there never stopped dripping." "Ah." "I spoke to Young Wasim about that." " What did he say?" " No idea." "It was in Hindi." " I thought I might fix it myself." " You?" "When?" "Well, no time like the present." "Where is this?" "Where are we?" "Janta Colony, Kachchi Basil" "Well, what happened to my usual route?" "Anokhi has invited you to her home." "Who's Anokhi?" "The one who brings your food." "She wants you to meet her family." "How soon can I leave?" "She wants to thank you for your kindness." "I haven't been kind." "You are the only one that acknowledges her." "I'm not eating that." "You will insult her very deeply if you do not." "It's good." "Oh!" "Get off there!" "The little bastards!" "Get off!" "Get up!" "Get 'em off there!" "Get 'em off me" "Ah." "I" " I di" "I didn't know they were playing." "I" "Sorry." "I'm sorry." "Sorry." "How much for this piece?" "One thousand rupees." "Thank you." "No, no, no, no." "Forgive me." "Forgive me." "No, no." "That's, um" " That's not how it works." "Uh, sorry to butt in." "But, uh, you don't ask him how much he wants." "You just tell him how much you'll pay." "She'll give you, uh" " She'll give you 200." "Absolutely no more, final offer." "One thousand rupees." "Pity." "Walk away." "Now walk away." "Oh, but" "I know what I'm doing." " The thing is I really wanted to buy that." " He'll come after us." "Do you think so?" "Absolutely." "This is how the game is played." "Just keep on walking." "He's playing it very cool, but he'll come." "Ah." "He's playing it very, very, um, cool." "850, 900, 950, 'I,000." "Thank you." "Sure." "You'll get him next time." "Why are you carrying a tap?" "You see, what I think, and of course, I'm no expert, is that the gland nut has come away from the spindle, so it needs to be tightened and resealed." "The washer valve has eroded." "Yeah." "Uh, well, uh, yeah." "It-It-It could be that too." " Um, uh, can you fix it?" " Not cheaply." "Not cheaply." "Most expensively indeed." "I was in a" " I was in a tuk-tuk the other day." "It didn't seem to be taking the usual route back to the hotel." "It turned out the driver had decided to take me to another hotel... he was sure I'd prefer." "Of course, one wants to believe that he genuinely had my welfare at heart... and that it wasn't run by his brother-in-law." "One wants to trust in general, don't you think?" "But you never really know." "I met my husband the day the fair came to town." "My girlfriend and I went on the carousel." "Her horse was fine, but when the ride started," "I felt mine give a little, as if it might collapse." "And then suddenly, I felt these arms around me, and a voice in my ear said, Just trust me, and I did." "Without question, till the day he died." "How wonderful." "The sale of our flat went through last week." "I had to sell it to pay off Hugh's debts." "I've been forced to get a job out here, which, in fact, I love." "Because even at Sonny's rates, I couldn't make ends meet." "Not after what happened to our life savings." "So, no, you're right." "You never know." "Off you go then." "Excuse me." "Off you go." "Go home!" "Go, go!" "But I've already filled this form in." "I've given it to you, many times." "There is a process." "You are making an inquiry, and for each inquiry, a form must be filled in." "But it's the same inquiry I make every day." "And, therefore, the same form you must fill in." "Mrs. Ainslie." "How can you bear this country?" "What do you see that I don't?" "Oh, the light, colors." "Smiles." "And" "And the way people see life as a- as a- as a privilege and-and not a right." "It-It teaches me something." "Is that milk pasteurized?" "Yes, ma'am." "Very, very pasturized." "But that's not true, is it?" "You're lying to me just now because" "No, no. it'll be fine." "Thank you." "It was a pleasant surprise to see you out and about." "Was it?" "Yes, yes." "it's progress, I think." "I was going to the bank." "To the bank." "Not that there's any reason to think that something has changed, but our daughter, Laura, she did promise, and one tries to remain optimistic." "Otherwise" "Otherwise" "Actually, I wasn't going to the bank." "I was looking for you." "In fact, I think I've been looking for you for a very long time." "Mrs. Ainslie." "Jean." "I'm gay." "As in... happy?" "Yes, yes." "Yes, of course." "I see." "I see." "Thank you." "What for?" "For averting my complete humiliation." "As I said, this country's driving me mad." "Shall we go?" "Anything?" "Not yet." " How about now?" " One second." "Oh!" " Good Lord!" " What?" "Listen." "And now" "No drip!" "Oh!" "No drip!" "High five." "No, sorry." "I don't know why I did that." "I've never done it before in my life." "Mrs. Ainslie." "Darling." "How are you?" "Did you have a good day?" "Well, let me tell you about ours." "Your husband of many a year, who's never known which end of a hammer to use, has finally managed- We have to get out of here." " What did you say?" " I can't stay in this country a moment longer." "Why?" "Excuse me." "Pick a reason." "Pick ten." "The climate, the squalor." "The poverty." "This whole trip is a grotesque fantasy." " It's time we went home." " Who's paying for the tickets?" "Look at us." "A group of self-deluding old fossils... traipsing around as if we're on some bloody gap year, humiliating ourselves." "Not us." "We couldn't pay." "And I don't see you asking our friends back home." "We should just face up to the truth." "That We're all old." "We're all past it." "That's the real truth." "The raw, unvarnished fact of the matter." "All we're good for now is a beige bloody bungalow." "With a sodding panic button in the... sodding corner." "We just have to make the best of things, darling." "I really think that's the best thing to do." "Yes, well!" "When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you." "Come on." "Come on." "Pick up." "Pick up." "Pick up." "Pick up." "Pick up." "Well, in that case, thank you for your call." "I'll get back to you as soon as I've discussed this with my manager." "Sunaina, I must see you." "I must." "If I cannot hold you in my arms tonight, I swear I will go mad." "I yearn for you." "I burn for you." "I think it's my sister you're burning for there, Sonny boy." "Thank you, Jay." "Thank you." " Hey." " Private line, Sunaina." "Do those words mean nothing to you?" "He took the phone." "What could I do?" "I miss you." "I miss you every moment." "Come and see me." "Tonight." "I cannot tonight." "It's our parents' 25th wedding anniversary." " Tell your mother that." " Come after." "Come late." "You will be asleep." "No, I'll be waiting." "You'll be asleep." "But I can wake you up in that special way." " You'll sneak in?" " I'm not ashamed." "No, no, no." "Neither am I. Absolutely not." "There is no shame." "You don't have to sneak." "Although, if you did want to be very quiet and not let anyone see, it couldn't hurt." "Su" " Sunaina?" "I wanted to tell you something." "Would you tell her I was glad to come?" "Glad she invited me." "Glad to meet her family- her grandmother and her kids." "She asks if you have children." "No, I looked after somebody else's." "Just this one family." "Years I was with 'em." "I ran the house." "Looked after the money, did it all." "Uh" " Cared for them like they were my own." "One day, they decided I needed some help." "I was grateful." "And they got this- this young woman." "And I tried to teach her." "Not just the books." "How to crisp up the bacon, the way the gentleman preferred it, you know." "And how the little one liked to have her hair brushed." "Just, you know, little things... you only know if you really care." "Well, I- I must've done a good job." "'Cause they said I was no longer useful to them." "They thanked me for my service... as if that was all it was." "I found, um, a flat in the end." "My problem was what to do with all the time I had." "I mean, the flat" " It's so small, I can have it spotless in half an hour." "And then, you know, what am I supposed to do?" "For the rest of the day?" " Give her these, will you?" " Sure." "John Smith." "Mr. John Smith." "That's right." "Me." "Ah, this way." "J Freak out J" "J Le Freak, c'est chic J" "J Freak out J" "J Ahhh, freak out J" "J Le Freak, c'est chic J" "J Freak out J" "J Have you heard about the new dance craze ?" "J" "J Listen to us I'm sure you'll be amazed J" "J Big fun to be had by everyone J" "J It's up to you It surely can be done JJ" "Hello?" "Marigold Hotel." "Is this it?" "This is it." "You're not worried about the danger of having sex at your age?" "If she dies, she dies." "Progress!" "Progress!" "Mrs. Donnelly!" "Mrs. Hardcastle!" "The wheel is turning most assuredly in our favor!" "Mr. Dashwood, everybody, great news!" "What is it, Sonny?" "They are working." "They are working!" "Well, that is good news." "What are working?" "The telephones of the Marigold Hotel." "I must tell everybody." "I must tell my mother!" "Congratulations." "Mr. Dashwood, wait." "Uh, you have a phone call." "No way they could find anything in that office." "They probably just picked an address out at random... just to- just to keep me off their backs." "I'm sure that's what happened." "It's going to be nothing." "Don't you think it's going to be nothing?" "I think you should just knock on the door and see." "Oh, I" " I'm sorry to disturb you." "Um, my name is Graham Dashwood." "And, uh, many years ago" "I know who you are." "L-I-I'm" " I'm sorry." "I-I don't know who you are." "I'm Gaurika, the wife of Manoj." "Oh, well, I'm very pleased to meet you." "Um, if you could, uh" " If you'd, uh, tell him that I called by," "I'd very much appreciate it." "What was she thinking?" "I beg your pardon?" "His wife." "Manoj's wife." "She knew who Graham was." "Had he told her?" "Do you think we'll find out tomorrow?" "Not me." "I'm heading up to the Badi Mahal Palace." "I'm very excited." "I've been reading all about it." "Tell me." "Well, I would if I could remember" "Please come." "Nice meal." "Romantic music." "Please come." "We've already eaten." "Thank you." "Please come." "Please come." "A midnight booty call, how utterly marvelous." "I'm sorry." "I'm so sorry." "I don't know what your name is, but I'm incredibly sorry." "Don't be." "It's the most action I've had in weeks." " If you would just please" " Don't worry, Mrs. Hardcastle!" "I can explain each and-and every thing." "Oh, my God." "You're naked?" "Mrs. Hardcastle, I must apologize with deep and profound sincerity." "How could you not tell me you weren't in your room?" "Yes, Sunaina, to you, too, I must apologize." "Now go." "Get out." "I'm going to" "What is going on here?" "Who screamed?" "No, no, no, no, no." "This is a respectable hotel, not a brothel." "You, take your things and get out." "Get out." "Mrs. Hardcastle, I expected better of you." "Actually, this is exactly what I expected of you." "Nevertheless" "Mrs. Kapoor, I'm Sunaina." "Since I will not be paying for your services, your name is of no interest to me." "How do you know mine?" "Because this- This is my Sunaina." "This is the girl you described to me as not too modern?" " This is getting interesting." " Mummyji, don't get the wrong idea." "Sunaina was not here to be with Mrs. Hardcastle." "She was here to have sex with me." "This is the kind of woman you are?" "Okay." "Each to her own." "But don't you ever tell me that you are a suitable wife for my son." "Just take your things and get out." "Sunaina?" "How did it go?" "I've seen the top of the mountain." "And it is good." "I saw someone yesterday." "A man I haven't seen for years." "A man that I've loved all my life." "A man?" "Yes." "Carry on." "I didn't know how he'd been in the meantime." "I" "I-I-I didn't want to guess, really, 'cause I'd brought disgrace on him and his family, and I imagined he might hate me." "Well, we talked all night." "Yeah, he's been happy." "He's had a peaceful life and, uh, he's never forgotten me." "That's what he said." "Hmm." "All that time, I thought I'd sentenced him to a life of shame." "But I was the one in prison." "But not any more." "Top of the mountain." "How was the night?" "Rather special." "Oh!" "You are back again." "It's been quite a remarkable night all around." "First you tell me your news." "First you tell me your news and th" "Day 45." "Of course, it was inevitable." "Put enough 0ld people in the same place, it won 7 be too long before one of them goes." "Graham died of a heart condition which he'd had for many years." "So he knew before he left that he would not be coming back." "He wanted to die in India." "He just didn't want any of us to know." "He kept his promise to lake me to Udaipur." "Manoj wanted him to have a Hindu burial there, by the lake." "At the place they had visited together." "Not a holy place." "Although, for them, perhaps it was." "It takes a long time for a body to be consumed" "Many hours for the mourners to remember their dead" "The fire must be W at dawn, and by sunset there must be nothing left but ash." "Is it our friend we are grieving for, whose life we knew so little?" "Or is it our own loss that we are mourning?" "Have we traveled far enough that we can allow our tears to fall ?" "When someone dies, you think about your own life." "And I don't want to grow older." "I don't want to be condescended to." "To become marginalized and ignored by society." "I don't want to be the first person they let off the plane in a hostage crisis." "Hello." "Oh, hello." "I wondered where you'd been." "We're all having a drink up top." "I went to see Gaurika, Manoj's wife." "Why?" "I wanted to ask her how much she knew." "The answer is that she knew everything." "That he loved another man, that he always would." "He told her when the marriage was arranged." "They had no secrets from each other." "None." "That's right, isn't it?" "That has to be right." "It made me realize how much I'd failed Hugh." "What's the use of a marriage when nothing is shared?" "Mrs. Greenslade." "Might I have my husband back now?" "Douglas?" "Forgive me." "Sorry." "Sorry." "Forgive me." "Sorry." "She was upset." "Oh, spare me your explanation." "Do you think I'm jealous?" "I don't see why else you would've embarrassed me and Evelyn." "You seem to be doing a perfectly good job of embarrassing yourself." "Can you imagine how ghastly it is for everyone... to see you mooning around after that simpering, doe-eyed ex-housewife, taking advantage of her loneliness?" "God, can you hear yourself?" "Can you?" "Do you have any idea what a terrible person you've become?" "All you give out is this endless negativity." "A refusal to see any kind of light and joy, even when it's staring you in the face." "And a desperate need to squash any sign of happiness in me or-or-or anyone else." "It's a wonder I don't fling myself at the first kind word or gesture... that comes my way, but I don't!" "O-O-Out of some sense of dried up loyalty and respect." "Neither of which I ever bloody get in return." "I checked my e-mails." "There's one from Laura." "Are you all right?" "I just want a glass of water." "That was a gin and tonic." " I know that now." " What's happened?" "Ah." "Good evening, the Ainslies." "How are you both?" "We're particularly well." "Douglas, tell them our news." "We're going home." "And so now I would ask you to loosen the strings on your purse, Mr. Maruthi, and-and do it most rapidly." "So that phase two development... of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel can begin with immediate effect." "Mrs. Donnelly, I believe." "Now if you please be following me to the ground floor" "How are things at the hotel?" "Mr. Maruthi." "Oh, they're better." "They're getting better." "You see?" "Profound satisfaction." "Such is the inevitable result of a prolonged stay at the Marigold Hotel." "What are those men doing?" "Working for me, Mr. Maruthi." "To create a home for the elderly so wonderful... that they will simply refuse to die." "Stare death in the face and say" "What are those men doing?" "Mummyji, what is going on here?" "Sonny, I have spoken to your brothers." "They have decided to sell the hotel." "These men are here to value the building." "They are valuing the land." "My brothers don't care about the building." "They will knock it down." "Well, they could wait for a month... for it to fall down of its own accord, huh?" "You joke, Mummyji, but inside, I know you're not laughing." "You don't want to see this dream destroyed." "Send these people away." "No, beta, it's too late." "Mummyji, please, if I could just show you these figures" "I don't need to see them." "I know they don't add up." "There is still time to turn things around." "With a small injection of funds, we can" "Who is going to be trusting you with this money, huh?" "You, who can't even run a Chai stand?" "Just like your father." "Do I remind you of him so much?" "Is that why you must be so cruel to me?" "You think I'm being cruel?" "You loved my father, and he loved this hotel." "You want to end up a broken man like him?" "Just say good-bye to all this and come back to Delhi with me." "Your life will be much easier." "No." "Not easier, Mummyji, Smaller." "Mrs. Donnelly." "Uh, can I help you?" "It depends." "Do you know how to work a computer?" "Mrs. Ainslie said she knew an address where I could get some things I need." "Some biscuits." "She said I could get them on the line?" "Well, I wish you luck." "The whole thing is actually tremendously exciting." "Not just getting on the plane, but getting on the plane and turning left." "Turning left?" "First class." "And home in time for our 40th wedding anniversary." "We haven't quite decided how to mark the occasion." "Perhaps a minute of silence." "Yes." "Okay." "Okay, sir." "I've confirmed your appointment for tomorrow morning at 10:00." "Thank you." "Now, Mr. Maruthi- Mrs. Donnelly, please." "Call me Bhanuprakash." "Too small." "One large should it us all, I think." "Actually, I think I'll walk." "Apparently, they're getting ready for some festival." "Perhaps y-you'd like one of us to accompany you?" " I'm happy to walk with you." " No, no, no, I'm fine." "I'm so pleased about your daughter's success and that it's all worked out so well." "Thank you." "Darling?" "Darling." "It's me." "I just wanted to hear your voice." "Oh, no." "No, sorry." "I didn't even think about the time." "How are you?" "And Polly and the" " How are the boys?" "Oh." "Good." "Good." "I'm glad you've been reading it." "Yes." "Yes, I made a few very good friends." "No, I'm fine." "Of course I am." "I'm fine." "Time's up in there, madam." "Um, I think the money's running out." "So I'll call you again, um, at another time." "Okay." "Bye, darling." "I'll call you again soon." "Bye." "Sonny." "Sonny!" "Mrs. Greenslade, where are the others?" "They're on their way back to the hotel." "What's the matter?" "I-I wanted to warn you of the most momentous changes that are occurring." "Absolutely all of them, without question, for the very positive." "What are you talking about?" "I am delighted to announce the closing of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel." "And the joyful return of all its inhabitants to their home country." "What?" "Please relax in the knowledge that your journey home... has been arranged and paid for by the hotel." "Our journey here was arranged and paid for by the hotel and look how that went." "I'd rather walk back to England." "I'd rather not go back at all." "Go back where?" "And for myself, the news is even better." "I shall be moving to Delhi to live with my mother." "And, furthermore, I shall be wed to a most suitable person of her choice, whom I look forward very much to meeting before I spend the rest of my life with her." "Didn't you have a girlfriend?" "She is my girlfriend no longer." "This is a disaster." "No, no." "Then we must treat it just the same as we would treat a triumph, madam." "Is that not what your Mr. Kipling tells us?" "Although, of course, here we have a problem, because I, Sunil lndrajit Kapoor, have never had a triumph." "So, of course, I do not know how to treat one." "No, all I've had is a constant series of disasters... interspersed with occasional catastrophe, an unending stream of total" "Sonny, do you love her?" "Sunaina?" "Most deeply." "Have you told her you love her?" "It is because I love her that I must not tell her." "She can do so much better than me, madam." "Women love it when you say that kind of thing." "It's a powerful aphrodisiac." "Really?" "No, of course not." "Go and ind her at once, before she starts to believe you and you lose her forever." "You can have anything you want, Sonny." "You just need to stop waiting for someone to tell you you deserve it." "My God." "Or you can just go on failing yourself and hurting" "Mrs. Greenslade, stop drilling." "You have struck oil, madam!" "I asked him to come and stay with me." "Is that wise?" "I'm not sure he's trained." "You think it's too soon." "It doesn't matter what I think." "It is too soon." "At our age, we can't afford the luxury of taking it slow, and it's either this or he goes home and" "I wish you both the very best." "You haven't met anyone?" "Single by choice." "Just not my choice." "I actually think it might be over." "For me." "With men." "And if that's gone," "I'm not quite sure what's left." "Did you know Norman brought pills the first night he stayed with me?" "It obviously did the trick." "They fell out of his pocket, and I didn't want it to be like that." "So I swapped them." "He went all night on two aspirin." "it's never over." "Can you make sure that small bag goes in the back with me?" "In the back, yes?" "In the back." "Do you understand?" "Excuse me." "Would you rather not see him?" "My wallet." "I-I've forgotten my wallet." "I'm so" " I'm so sorry." "I won't" " I won't be a minute." "She's not back yet." "Ah." "Right." "Well, then perhaps you could tell her that I said, um, good-bye." "False alarm." "I, uh- I had it all the time." "Let's go." "While I have you on the phone, madam, can I talk to you about our special offers?" "This is a particularly good time to be thinking of taking advantage... of our new and improved system." "Sunaina!" "Sunaina!" "Sunaina!" "I Jay 1 Hey, what's going on?" "Sonny?" "I need to see Sunaina." "Her shift's not over." "And when it is, she doesn't want to see you." "Jay." "You" " You are the son my mother wished I was." "An intelligent man with a strong head for business." "You see things as they are and not as you wish them to be." "So fuck off out of my way!" "Or you can give her a message." "Tell her from me what I should have told her the day we met." "What I will announce to anyone who asks and many who do not." " Including your mother?" " Including my mother?" " His mother." " Your mother." "I will tell every mother in the land." "What will you tell them?" "What will you tell them?" "The only thing that matters in this world." "That I love you and always will." "And by you I mean Sunaina, Jay, not you." "Although if you are to be my brother-in-law, I hope we can become better friends." "Why is he only saying this now?" "You ask him." "Why are you only saying this now?" "Because, Sunaina, love of my life, no more will I believe that I'm not worthy." "For only by loving you as you deserve will I become so." "it's funny." "They call this rush hour, and yet nothing actually moves." "Well, it's not that... funny." "Where do you think you're going?" "You may well ask." "We're moving in together, Mrs. D." " Already?" " That point's been made." "The hotel is closing, Mrs. Donnelly." "It doesn't have to." "I've been going over the accounts." "M ay I?" "Mummyji." "Mummyji, do you remember what my father used to say?" "That nothing happens unless first we dream." "And I have dreamt, Mummyji, and like him, I have failed." "The Marigold Hotel is crumbling to dust, and it turns out I can live with that." "But the one thing I will not do is live without this girl." "This is Sunaina Shantanu Palawar." "The woman I love and wish to marry." "I'm very pleased to meet you, Mrs. Kapoor." "No, Sonny." "I forbid it." "I forbid this match." "Utterly and completely." "Do you hear me?" "This can't happen." "What is he saying?" "Um" "He says that he's been with this family for as long as he can remember." "And that he remembers another tight." "Between two young people and their parents." "And he remembers the moment when the young man... stood up to his mother and said" " And said..." "Yes, I want to marry this woman." "Yes, she comes from a different community, but she's smart and she's beautiful," "and I love her." "I don't know who he's talking about." "Sunaina, I may have no right to judge, but I have a mother's right to worry." "Take care of my favorite son." "Sorry." "I'm not clear now." "Am I staying or going?" " Well, it depends how you read the accounts." " The accounts?" "It turns out the original plan for the hotel is good." "It works." "Just not in the hands of a lunatic." "I knew that plan was good." "What the place needs is money." "And guests, starting with the ones that are already here." "Unfortunately, my investor, Mr. Maruthi, has decided that, while he greatly admires my endeavors" " He's reconsidered." " You spoke to him?" "So long as there's somebody sane to help the manager." "No." "The manager needs no help, madam." "Sonny." "Hmm." " The manager needs a little help." " So will you stay?" " I'd like to." " In the shack on the roof?" "We have a- a double room, bathroom en suite, and a fully working door." "Mr. Dashwood, as you know, has recently checked out." "Oh." "Mrs. Hardcastle, you'll stay." " On my own?" " I know you're off your game, dear." "Lost your confidence maybe." "But, you know, you are a thoroughbred." "You'll be back." "What about you, Mrs. Greenslade?" "What about me, Mrs. Donnelly?" "We haven't talked much, have we?" "You and I." "My loss, evidently." "Will you stay?" "I'm not sure what I shall do." "Nothing here has worked out quite as I expected." "Most things don't." "But, you know, sometimes what happens instead is the good stuff." "Don't you have work to go to in the morning?" "Yes." "Now, if you'll excuse me." "If I can stand on my own two feet, I'm sure you can too." "Who's the new assistant manager?" "Mr. Maruthi had me in mind." "You thinking of applying for the job?" "Oh, chair, please." "That's quite enough exercise for one day." "Office." "Oh, steady." "Oh!" "This is absolutely ridiculous." "We could be here for hours." "There's no way we'll get out of here." " Well, maybe there is." " You!" "Can you get us to the airport?" "Sorry." "Long way." "Sore legs." "Not possible." "I'll give you everything I have." "Okay, step right in, let's go." "Can you get our cases out, please?" "Come on, Douglas." "Come on, Douglas, come on." " Sorry, no manage people and cases." " What?" "It's not possible, madam." "Two persons, no cases." "One person and cases." "Well, how about if I give you something else?" "I'll give you my watch." "Sure." "Thanks." "But still it's not possible, madam." "We'll get another flight." "Let's go back to the hotel and leave in the morning." "No." "Jean, he can't do it." "You heard what he said." " He can do one person and cases." " Yeah, but" "Could fate find a better way to tell us what we need to hear?" " Which is what?" " That it's over." "That it's been over for a long, long time." "This is not the time to talk about this." "Let's wait until we get home." "I have to go, Douglas." "I won't let you." "No." "You'll come after me." "You'll chase me to the airport, tell me everything will be fine." "But please don't." "Because the truth is" "The truth is we both deserve more than we've had." "And it's just because of your... kindness and your" "your loyalty that you won't admit it." "I'll be all right." "I'm turning left." "Good-bye, Douglas." "Day 57." "The any real failure is the failure to tly." "And the measure of success is how we cope with disappoinment." "As we always must" "We came here and we fried" "All of us in our different ways." "Can we be blamed for feeling that we are too old to change?" "Too scared of disappoinment to start it all again ?" "We get up in the morning." "We do our best" "Nothing else matters." "You're still here." "I-I-I missed the plane." "What about Jean?" "She didn't." "I had" " I had quite an interesting night actually." "I-I met the same, um, taxi driver, but this time I let him take me to his brother's hotel." "Wh-Which turned out to be less of a hotel and more of a- more of a brothel really." "And they" " And they gave me this pipe, said it was apple tobacco." "But that's not what they called it when I was a student." "So-So I made my excuses and left." "Uh, I need- I needed time to... think." "This city at night is extraordinary." "I think the apple tobacco helped probably." "I'm going to be late for work." "Right." "Um" "What time do you finish?" "I get back about 5:00." "Teatime." "Yes." "How do you take it?" "With a little milk." "All right." "But it's also true that the person who nsks nothing... does nothing, has nothing." "All we know about the future is that it will be different" "Just your signature, please." "Thank you." "Enjoy your stay." "Welcome." "Please." "This is a building of the utmost character." "But perhaps what we fear is that it will be the same." "So we must celebrate the changes." "Thank you." "Because, as someone once said, everything will be all nfght in the end." "And if it's nott all right, then trust me" "It's not yet the end"