"Hey, watch it." "Oh, come on." "Hey, Mike!" "Hey, Larry." "How you doing?" "Have you seen Nicky?" "I'm pretty sure he went with Erica." "It was half day today." "Parent Career Day." "Hey." "Hey." "Come on in." "You all right?" "Yeah, yeah." "Why didn't anybody tell me it was Career Day?" "What do you mean?" "Nicky said he was gonna tell you." "Oh, okay, I guess he forgot." "There he is." "How are you, Larry?" "Good." "How are you doing, Don?" "Good." "Can you believe this weather?" "Chilly, right?" "Chilly, chilly, Chilly Willy the penguin." "Leave me alone." "Hey, why don't I go tell the little corncob you're here." "Great." "Great, that's great." "Yeah, thanks." "Wow, your fiance really manages to squeeze a lot onto that belt." "Stop it." "What?" "What?" "No, it's like he's the Batman of stockbrokers." "Bond trader." "Bond trader." "Sorry." "Hey, how's it going with that virtual-reality driving range that you wanted to open?" "Getting there, still waiting for the technology to catch up." "It's not easy, there are a lot of moving parts." "Hey, do you think Nick would like Queens?" "Oh, no, Larry." "You didn't get evicted again, did you?" "I didn't get evicted." "I didn't get evicted, no." "I mean, I didn't...." "No, I didn't get evicted yet." "It's like" "Larry, listen to me." "I don't know how much more Nicky can take." "Every couple months, it's a new career, a new apartment." "If it wasn't for Nicky, I wouldn't say anything, I would stay out of it." "It's just, it's too much instability." "It's not good for him." "I'm trying to figure things out right now, okay?" "You know I don't think that Nicky should stay with you." "What?" "Just until you get really settled." "Hey, Dad." "Hey, ready to carve it up?" "Cool." "All right, good!" "Take it, Nicky!" "Break away!" "What are you doing?" "Hey, Nicky!" "Are you all right?" "You okay?" "I'm fine." "Would you get off the ice?" "Listen." "Their left defenseman is a very weak skater." "So you go left side, you got a clear shot at the goal." "Okay?" "Cool, thanks." "All right, man." "We're good here." "We're good." "All right." "As you were, skaters." "Game on!" "I'm good." "I'm telling you, you tore it up out there today." "Thinking the NHL is a serious possibility." "I don't really wanna be a hockey player anymore." "All right." "What do you wanna be?" "A bond trader." "A bond trader?" "Yeah, it's what Don does." "He took me to his office last week." "That's cool." "So you wanna dress up in a monkey suit and tie every day?" "Like an automaton robot?" "Trust me, you can't play hockey in a cubicle." "Kind of awkward." "Well, he's got a pretty big office." "That's not the point." "Come on, you love hockey." "I still like it, but bond trading's my fallback." "Your fallback?" "Wait a minute." "You're too young to have a fallback, okay?" "And also, where did you ever even hear that word?" "Mom was talking to Don about all your different schemes." "She called them schemes?" "She said it was time you found a fallback." "Are you really moving again?" "I don't know." "We'll see." "I mean there's some pretty cool places out in Queens." "Yeah." "Hey." "Hey, Nicky, look at me." "Look at me, man." "I wanna tell you something." "I know that things have been kind of up and down for me lately and that's been hard for you." "But I really feel like my moment's coming and when it does everything's just gonna come together, you know?" "What if you're wrong and you're just an ordinary guy who should get a job?" "All right, well...." "You know what, we'll figure it out, okay?" "All right?" "Come on, let's get you back to Mom's." "Mr. Daley, I can honestly say, in 43 years at this agency I've never seen a resume quite like yours." "All right." "That wasn't a compliment." "It says here you were the CEO of Snaptime lndustries." "Care to elaborate on that?" "Sure." "Well, that was the umbrella corporation for my invention, the Snapper." "You know, you snap, the lights come on." "Snap, they come off." "Didn't they already make that?" "No, no, that's the Clapper, which, obviously stole a bit of our thunder." "Personally, I don't really see what the big difference is, I mean:" "You know, whatever, but apparently there is a significant portion of the population that has trouble actually..." "...snapping." "Clapping's easier." "Debatable." "I can't help you." "Debbie?" "Can I call you Debbie?" "Because I felt a connection when I entered this office and I don't know, I feel like you did too." "I didn't feel a connection." "Look." "I need a job tomorrow, okay?" "If I don't have one...." "Well, I just need it, okay?" "Well, I don't know." "I might have one thing." "They've turned down everyone I've sent over there, but" "Great." "who knows?" "You might get lucky." "Excuse me." "Hi." "Hi." "I'm Larry Daley." "I've got a job interview with Cecil Fredricks." "Right." "He should still be in his office." "Great." "I'm Rebecca Hutman." "I'm a docent here." "Hi." "Let me point you in the right direction." "Great." "Teddy Roosevelt, right?" "Yes, a great visionary." "Yes, definitely." "He was our 4th president, right?" "Twenty-sixth." "Twenty-sixth." "Please don't touch the exhibits!" "I mean...." "Riffraff." "Miss Hutman." "I cannot tolerate this type of chaos." "I mean, this is a museum, not a...." "Do you know what "museum" means?" "It doesn't mean, "Daddy, it's a big Tyrannosaurus thing." "Can I touch its leg? " No!" "Work it out, please." "Will do, sir." "Thank you." "Dr. McPhee, the museum director." "Seems like a fun guy." "Control your young, please." "Can we?" "Hello?" "Just kidding." "Hi." "I'm Larry Daley." "Are you Mr. Fredricks?" "Mr. Fredricks was my father." "I am Cecil." "Good to meet you, Larry." "Nice firm handshake." "I like that." "Tells a lot about a man." "Come on in." "Let's talk turkey here." "The museum is losing money, hand over fist." "I guess kids today don't care about wax figures or stuffed animals." "So they're downsizing, which is code for firing myself and the other two night guards." "They want to replace us with one new guard." "Oh, sorry." "Well, what are you gonna do?" "I'd like you to meet my two colleagues here." "Reginald?" "Gus?" "Where is he?" "I'll beat him with my fist!" "Gus, this is Larry Daley, the kid who wants to be the new night guard." "Night guard?" "No, the lady at the agency said this was a museum position." "Most important position in the museum, Larry." "He looks like a weirdie." "Wonderful guard, terrible people skills." "Now, listen, lunch box." "Don't try anything funny." "I once went nine rounds with John L. Sullivan." "You never fought John L. Sullivan in your life." "Gentlemen, we have a job candidate here." "He's got an excellent resume, a winning attitude and I say let's give him a shot." "What do you say?" "Hang on a sec." "I think I might wanna have a little time just to think it over." "Do you want the job or not, snack shack?" "No, no, I want the job" "Welcome to the night guards, Larry." "Larry, meet me up on the second floor." "I'll slip into my orthopedics and give you a little tour." "Arthritic knees." "Not fun getting old, my friend." "Go on." "You really think he's the one?" "Oh, yes." "He's the one." "Gotta keep it moving, Larry." "I'm pretty spry for an old man." "This is the Diorama Room." "Oh, yeah." "I remember these little guys." "Cute." "Cecil!" "Hey, Cecil!" "Did I get you good?" "Yeah." "You got me." "Seriously, though, no fooling around in here." "This stuff is really old." "All right, then." "As you can see, it's pretty quiet in here these days." "On the left there is your Attila the Hun." "And here we have our Easter Island head." "Hey, Cecil." "And this, of course, is the Hall of African Mammals." "Ah, yes." "Monkeys." "I love monkeys." "Yeah." "Guy's cute." "Yeah, we call him Dexter." "He's quite a little ball of fun, aren't you, Dexter?" "Moving on." "And, finally, this is the temple of the Pharaoh Ahkmenrah." "And in that tomb right down there, the pharaoh himself." "Neat." "And hanging on the wall behind him was his most prized possession, the Tablet of Ahkmenrah." "Twenty-four-carat gold." "It's worth a fortune." "Very cool." "It is indeed, Larry." "Very cool." "All right." "Report here at 5 tomorrow." "We'll walk you through your duties." "Okay, 5." "I'll be here." "Moving on." "Hey, it's me." "So I got a job." "Larry, that's great." "What is it?" "It's a job at the Museum of Natural History." "Yeah, so you can tell Nicky that we won't be moving." "Larry, this is good news." "Yeah, no, definitely." "So I'll see you tomorrow?" "Okay." "Okay, bye." "Larry?" "Your keys." "Your torch." "Right." "You'll wanna strap those to your belt." "It can get a little spooky around here at night so you might wanna put a few lights on." "All right, flashlight, keys." "What am I for--?" "The instruction manual." "Instructions." "You start with one, two, three...." "Four?" "Are you cracking wise?" "I ought to punch you in the nose, hopscotch." "Leave him alone, Gus." "You got it covered, right, Larry?" "Yeah, yeah, I got it." "You better get it!" "Gus." "Larry, do them in order, do them all and do them quick." "And the most important thing of all to remember:" "Don't let anything in or out." "Out?" "Good luck, son." "Night, Gus." "Young buck." "Cracking wise." "Moving on." "Hello?" "Hello!" "Check!" "Check." "I am Larry." "Check!" "Larry!" "Larry." "Monday!" "Monday!" "Monday!" "Monster Truck Rally." "Cecil?" "Okay, very funny, Cecil!" "What is this, like a David Copperfield thing?" "This is weird." "Cecil?" "Come on." "Revolve." "Revolve!" "Name, please?" "Cecil..." "..." "Fredricks!" "One moment." "Connecting." "Hello." "Cecil!" "It's Larry Daley!" "Larry." "Yes, how can I help you?" "The dinosaur" " The dinosaur is alive!" "I'm having a little trouble hearing you, friend." "Tequila." "The dinosaur's alive!" "What do I do?" "Tell me what to do!" "Read the instructions." "It explains everything." "Okay, I got them!" "I'll see you tomorrow." "Wait!" "What--?" "What bone?" "Fetch?" "Play fetch?" "No way." "Dum-dum." "Yes?" "You give me gum-gum." "I give you gum-gum?" "You new dum-dum." "You give me gum-gum." "Okay, you know what?" "I have no gum-gum." "Sorry." "And my name isn't dum-dum, my name's Larry." "No, your name dum-dum." "Oh, you in trouble, dum-dum." "You'd better run-run from Attila the Hun-Hun." "See you later, dum-dum." "What is happening?" "Hey." "How you doing?" "Are you...?" "You're "Sakagahwahwaya"?" "You're "Sakagawaya"?" "Oh, Sakagawea." "You're Sakagawea?" "The glass." "I can't hear you." "You can't...?" "You can't hear me?" "Excuse me." ""Who assisted the Lewis and Clark--"" "Right, so that's Lewis and Clark and you're...." "Right." "You seem" " I'm Larry." "What's going on?" "What's--?" "Do you know what's going on here?" "Huns." "I gotta" "Hey." "Hi." "Tin Man." "Hey." "Hi." "How you doing?" "I'm new." "It says I'm supposed to lock up the lions or they'll eat me." "You're Galileo?" "No?" "Okay...." "Hey, I'm the...." "Hi." "I'm the new guy and I'm just locking up, so...." "If it's cool with you I'm just gonna get my paperwork and be out of your hair, okay?" ""Double-check your belt." "The monkey probably stole your keys."" "Monkey." "Hey." "Hey there." "Hi." "What's your name?" "Your name is...." "No, no, no." "Come back." "Come back." "Dewey?" "Is that your name, Dewey?" "No, no, no." "What's--?" "Dewey?" "Dexter?" "Dexter." "Dexter, right?" "Hey, Dexter, you wanna give me those keys?" "I just want to lock up." "Yes." "Oh, good." "Come to Papa." "Oh, thank you." "Can I have those keys?" "Oh, good." "What a good boy." "That's okay." "Oh, thank you." "Oh, no, no, no." "It's okay." "Thank you very, very much." "Bad monkey." "Stop that." "That's not right." "Are you done?" "Do you have an issue with me?" "Do you have an issue with me?" "Because if I have a problem with somebody, I don't pee on them, okay?" "And also" " Let me tell you something." "These keys?" "Hey." "Dexter, that's not funny." "Give it back." "Dexter." "Give" "Don't." "I know what you're thinking." "Don't do it." "Not a good idea." "Not" " Dexter, I need those." "322"