"Oh, yes ..." "A bit further." "Now we're going to see the whole film we made." "Olav, please!" "You're going to see the whole story,   from when we moved out of the flat till we moved into our own house." "Mind the coffee cups, Olav." "Will you begin soon, Olav?" "It's coming out the front now." " What do I do now?" " You've got to stop it right away." " Put it in, Olav." " Yes, it goes in here." "I think I'd better do this, Olav." "You put it down through there and then up." "Shall I do it, Olav?" "The holes are on the other side now." "There ... no." "Here it comes." "No." "Bugger." "That's funny." "There's something wrong with the film." "What if I put this on here?" "No." " Olav, stop the machine right now." " Here it comes." "That's it." "It goes in here, you see." " It's swallowing the whole film." " There's chewing gum in here." " No!" " Yes, there's a piece of gum here." " Well, it wasn't me." " Not you, no." "There, I've got it now." " What's with this big loop?" " It means the film's broken." "Ow!" "I'm just trying to see." " What if it doesn't come out here?" " Then it's the wrong hole, Olav." "This is no good, Olav." "Use the right hole." "Here it comes." "If I pull it quickly, it works." "See?" "Any minute now." " There!" "Turning the first sod." " That was Ingrid." "It looked ugly." "I shot this." "I had never done this before." "No, film is not your strong point ..." "There's Trygve, the carpenter." " Who's that?" " Høydahl, our neighbour." "At the flat, before we moved out." "He was nasty." " He must have hurt himself." " It's going to be a great house." " My tummy!" " It wasn't that big yet." "This was when we tried the ... self-timer." "I want to keep this." "We splice this in." "And this bit goes." "We cut this out." "This is the first time on our plot." "There's a lot of sun, as you can see." " Ingrid shot this before we decided." " There are no trees left now." "Did you hurt yourself?" "You didn't, did you?" " Mum?" "Is this mushroom edible?" " Shall we buy it, Ingrid?" "I'll have the kitchen here, so I can watch the children playing." " It's going to be incredible." " Isn't it a bit steep?" "We won't change anything." "We'll have a patch of wood with berries and all." " But can we afford it, Ingrid?" " No one can afford to build a house." "Imagine lying on a Sunday morning, listening to the birds,   and then we go out and pick our own mushrooms." "And you go off the pill, so we'll get a little girl the day we move in." "Have you come to a decision?" " Well, about the money ..." " We have made up our minds." "I don't have to force you into buying a house." "It's something you only do once in a lifetime." "You won't regret this." "Look." "You know what this is?" "A little house." "It's a finished house, which I will deliver in ten months." "Guaranteed." " I don't know ..." " Yes." "Can we afford this?" "All right, then." "But isn't there a lot to do before you can start the actual building?" "It's a neat plot." "And the total price is guaranteed?" "Hello!" "Could you find another place to sing?" "We can't hear ourselves thinking." "I'm trying to do business here." "Olav?" "What did you break this time?" " I tried to throw away a bottle." " You're the dumbest man in creation." "This sheet is seriously warped." "Sunlight doesn't do the material any good." "It's five to six inches." "We can take it out and put ..." "This is a responsible job, so ..." "We move in when we have the baby." "Or should walk about all bloated?" "Don't worry about the house." "Kleppe promised it'll be ready in two weeks." "It takes time." "We can't afford a thing like this." "Think of junkies and all that." " You have to spend the night here." " No one will break in here." "If it wasn't for the glazier, the house would still be open." "Well, well." "Been thrown out, have you?" "Our was it just the window that was thrown out?" "The boss is taking me fishing." " Fishing?" "I can see you've got your rod." " Spinning reel and stuff." " We're going to pull in some cod." "Cod?" "How do you know you haven't pulled something already?" "That wasn't bad." "Tell me ..." "Have you got the roof on the house now?" "Yes, thanks." "Not only do I have a roof ..." "You're about to go through the roof?" "Hey, be careful with the window when you shut the door." "Hey, Femte!" "You do know we're havening a maintenance night today?" "On Barøveien." "This is not a camping ground." "Heavens to Betsy!" "You scared me." "I'm sorry." "I thought you were a tramp, or a Pakistani ..." " Or someone from the EEC ..." " Didn't you see my car?" "I did, but I thought Kleppe must have bought himself a new car." "He bought one a while ago." "He's a sly one." "He's good at ..." "You gave me a fright." "I thought you were a Pakistani or some ..." " Who was that?" " Isn't he ..." "What's his name?" "He's the ..." "The electrician." "Steen, the rally driver." "You know him." "He was miffed because he said he had a meeting here." " Well, I was here." " I didn't notice that." " But I guess it wasn't important." " Not important?" "There's not a single wire in the whole house." "We move in 1 3 days." "He'll be around." "He's driven Monte Carlo." " He'll be back in a few weeks." " I think people are crazy." "You know electricians are very busy." "It's a good job." " I should have been an electrician." " Is the money good?" "Yes." "No straining, no heavy stuff to lift." "They earn loads." "Just wait till you get the bill." " What's this?" " This is ..." " Two inches, 1.75" " But ..." " It looks like a work top." " It is for a work top." " We can't have a work top like this!" " No, well, the guy had a crane." "What idiot delivered this?" "He said it was according to your specifications." "I was a bit surprised, you know." "The measurements are quite massive." "I just wanted a small one in the corner." " 30 times 35 was the idea." " I was wondering about it, too." "Because your pretty little wife will need a stepladder for this." " If she had been a big, heavy ..." " I measured it myself." "This is, if I measure it by eye ..." "Let's see ... 6 feet her and ..." "About 3.5 feet." "This is ridiculous." "I used your folding rule." " My folding rule?" " Yeah." "I ..." "My folding rule." "You folded it the wrong way." "This is in centimetres." "This is measured in centimetres, other things are measured in inches." " An inch equals 2.6 centimetres." " Bugger!" "That's why the measurements are not correct." "We can use the sink as a swimming pool." " Well, well." "Is this the new house?" " Yes." "Well, it's not bad." "Did you place kitchen upstairs?" "You'll get some good exercise." "Well, it's not my problem." "It's yours." " Oh, well." " At least I have my own house." "Well, it won't be yours for a while yet." "While we're at it:" "I've got a bill." "Where is it?" "Ah, bills." "The tenants' association." "You're not out of it yet." "Here's a bill. 17 hours at 14.50 each   and the statutory fine for not showing up for maintenance night." "1 00 crowns plus 34 crowns VAT." "Yes ..." "Would you like to see the house?" "Hey!" "Everybody was there for maintenance night except you." "You got slagged off." " I had to be out here." " Right." "Fishing." " This is the lounge." " The lounge, right." " Didn't you talk about a large room?" " This room is 50 metres square." " It says 42 on the drawings." " That's nearly 50. including that." "This house will make history." "The roof construction is illegal." "You'll have no end of trouble." "It will collapse in the winter." " Have you done much yourself?" " Yes, I've worked all winter long." "I can see that." "Haven't you heard of the building control department?" "Wait till they come up here." "Well, it's not my problem." "Out here we'll have the terrace, so we have a view of ..." "The rock face?" "Are you interested in rocks, then?" " And the windows are good?" " It's that new double glazing." "Yes, made in Norway." "That's twice as expensive." "And twice as bad." "Well, well ..." "This will be great." " When are you moving in?" " In thirteen days." " What?" " Thirteen days." "My hearing is not that good." "Thirteen days?" " Yes." " Thirteen days!" "That's an unlucky number." "It's not on a Friday, is it?" "Knock on wood." "I can't take any more." "Mr Femte?" "Should I start cutting the work top?" "Oh, God!" "That new chest has just gone up 500 crowns." "It's worm-eaten now." "With buckshot. 500 crowns." "Did I frighten you, miss ... madam?" "I hope not." " I thought you were hunting an elk." " An elk?" "Is there an elk?" "Where is it?" "Was it an old elk?" "Elk!" "Come out!" "Did the elk pass by just now?" " I'm looking for something from ..." " If only the elk had come closer." "... a Swedish women's magazine." "They called it sophink." " An elk called Sophink?" " It's for putting things in." "You can't put elks in boxes." "That's cruelty to animals." "No, it's something to put things in." "Sophink." "Right, so pink." "Not yellow." "I have a sophink." " There's one." "A Swedish magazine?" " Yes, Swedish." "Sophink." "Sophink means barber's chair." " Ingrid, what's that?" " I bought it." " This?" " It's a sophink." "It's just an ordinary barber's chair." "I've sat in one hundreds of times." "Sit down." "Picture a dining room with this in it." "We can paint it yellow and upholster it with ribcord." "Imagine 12 of them." " 12?" "In this house?" " Yes." "I say ..." "Listen, civil engineer Kleppe ..." "You don't have to say engineer when the owner isn't here." " What was it about?" " There's this ..." "I asked about holiday pay at the office down here." "I asked ... it's discrimination ..." " How long had this been going on?" " Well, jumping giblets ..." " Really?" "And what did you answer?" " "I'm going to speak to Kleppe."" " That was a very good answer." " I told him, didn't I?" "You'll get your wages tomorrow." "Probably." "I think you're very lucky, Mr Femte." "Oh, hello." "Your lady wife has excellent taste." "Look around you." "A first-class house for a cheap price." " It's not finished yet." " No, exactly." " These are the non-standard extras." " Non-standard?" "Look, Olav!" "I hope there isn't any more small print on this contract, Mr Kleppe." "Your wife ordered this." "Yes, Mr Kleppe invited me for a chat about the bathroom." "Look." " Our special service for housewives." " How much?" " Well ..." " How much?" " It will be ever so pretty." " How much?" " 11,234.50 crowns." " 11,000?" "What's this?" ""One toilet roll holder: 862 crowns?"" "You should bear in mind that it is French, hand-painted china." "I think I'll take you down a little, Mr Kleppe." "What do I need hand-painted china for in a bathroom without any plumbing?" "You fraud!" "I shall remember those words, Mr Femte." "Goodbye." "Gangster!" "Well, Kleppe." "Are you annoyed and edgy?" " You're fiddling with those pawns." " I've done everything for them!" "It's no good." "But what's up with this." "Femte harps on about it being done in two weeks." "That's right out." "Take the electrician." "He hasn't done anything yet." "He was to install hidden wiring." "It's not just hidden,   there's not wiring at all." "He's driving his car." "It's no good." " You ought to know it's like that." " It's the same with every house." "That's building for you." "I've been in this business ... since I was 15." "My dad did a little moonlighting." "I know a lot of stories about my dad." "Want to hear one?" "My dad was building a house for the vicar." "Then he didn't get paid." "While we're at it, I haven't been paid for two months." "Plus holiday pay." "The social office said you are responsible for that." " It's coming." " I don't mean to push you." "I just thought it was best to talk to you about it." "I've got problems with all this commuting." "It's no good living in a hut." "I get smelly feet in wellies." "So then I remembered what you said at the Christmas party." ""Dear employees," you said ..." "We would get plots of land   to build our own houses, so we wouldn't have to commute." "I can't afford to buy petrol to get home." "I've got a broken fence." " I've got a few cows ..." " Trygve, I have a proposition." "You take some time off, go home and fix the fence." " I could do that." " You should." "But then there's Femte's house." "It won't be finished if I do." "And he has to pay his bills first." "And he has to sell the flat." "That could take time." "And until he sells the flat, I won't get paid!" "Until he sells the flat I ..." "Kleppe!" "Let's see." "There." "A cabin on Hvaler." "A boat and a private beach, underhand." "Not bad." "65,000." "What do you think?" "This is rich." "Listen." "We send you a big box of sweets for your kids, who live in a warm flat." "We've got four children, who are homeless." "That was number 736." "Mulltiplied by 50,000, say." "That's a lot af noughts." "36,840,000 crowns." "How about that?" "Photos of homeless children." "Some house we could have bought." " What's the matter?" " Don't you see this is a tragedy?" "We're not to blame for the housing shortage in Norway." "We just have this flat." "Surely you understand that." " That's not how I meant it." " Us two ..." "Why should we sell at the going rate?" "Everybody sells at inflated prices." "Can we be that stupid?" "What are you thinking of?" "Listen, Ingrid." "The going rate for this flat is 14,000 crowns." "That's nothing." "We're swamped with bills." "Think of how lucky we are to get our own house." "So we can help others." "Think about that." "Yeah." "The devil knows." "A map of the camping ground ..." "There." " Olav!" "Olav!" " Here." " Did you find it?" " I'm fed up." "There's 735 ..." "Are you crazy?" "I promised we'd come." "Come on." "Seip?" "Hello?" "This is it." " Your pass, please." " We can't let them live like this." " Lots of people live in tents." " lmagine rainy weather." " Can't they move in right now?" " Impossible." "I need the twelve days." "Twelve?" "Not fifteen or 20?" "Or 25?" "Cross your heart?" " And hope to die." " There you are." " Are they asleep?" " Like angels." ""Lobster tails." "Garlic sauce."" "The kitchen costs 1 ,000 crowns more than expected." " Why?" " Just a few details." "It's almost as expensive as a new work top." " Why were you so nasty to Kleppe?" " Kleppe is a con artist." "He's very thoughtful." "Most men don't understand things like bathrooms." " I understand the price." " That was my fault." "I saw that ..." "He's a villain." "A bandit." "You should handle him with care." "He might seek revenge, you know." "He's welcome to try." "I'll give him more stick tomorrow." "Goodnight." " Aren't you Steen the electrician?" " Fine, thank you." "Aren't you putting up the lights in my house today?" " I can't hear you." " You have to connect the lights." "You have a problem with your lights?" "The headlights?" " I my house." " The low beam?" "That's the lever down there." "Must have blown a fuse ..." "Hey!" "Anybody here?" "Kleppe?" " Stop shouting like that." " Why isn't anyone out there?" "We had to move our staff for a few days." "My apologies." "If this is your revenge for what I said yesterday, I'm warning you ..." "I'll contact my lawyer." "It can't be legal to punish people like that." "Pick a card, Mr Femte." "Pick a card." "Read it to me." ""On account of good behaviour you get a pardon."" "You're lucky." "A pardon." "I always play by the rules." "Don't you play Monopoly?" "I'm sorry I called you a gangster." "The prisoner is released." "We shall say no more about it." "But there's nobody at the building site." "It's completely ..." "Easy." "I'm as sorry about this as you are." "It's most unfortunate." "So I want to offer you compensation." " We're not hyenas." " You will send more builders in?" "I'm offering you assistance from our gardening expert, Treholt, for free." "I don't need a gardening expert." "It's just clay and rocks out there." " Don't you want a nice garden?" " I want the house finished first." "You should be grateful." "We don't give this offer to all our clients." "Kleppe is not that bad." "I've almost begun to like him." "We've got the fireplace up and the skirting boards." "It'll be nice." " What are you doing?" " I'm painting the ladder." "The ladder to the attic?" "Has it come?" " This is Trygve's ladder." " Oh, no." "Don't you think he'll be glad to get a nice, white ladder?" "I think it takes more than that." " Hello." "This looks like a dungheap." " No, you heap dung on the ground." " Then the trees and bushes grow." " But what is this?" " It's ... a Sognsti Plant Nursery." " But what species is it?" "A weeping willow." "It'll weep and weep." " And what's that?" " A weeping willow." " That too?" " Yes, weeping willows here and here." " And the small ones down there?" " That's mock weeping willow." "Mock weeping willow?" " What's that puny thing?" " That's a weeping willow." " That tiny thing?" " It'll grow into a nice, big tree." "It will be right outside my window." "That one grows downwards." "That's a weeping willow, too." "What have you done?" "We wanted steps here." "It'll be a lane." "A lane of sorrow." "You can be sad here." "I ordered a garden." "What's this?" "Another weeping willow?" "No." "That's poison ivy." "If the kids get into this, they'll die like flies." "Is it poisonous?" "We don't want that." " What about this?" " That's Saron's lily." " And there's some weeds here ..." " That's Queen Elizabeth." "Not that good in bed, but great against the wall." "There's no such thing as a Queen Elizabeth." "They're just bags of rotten flowers." "What is this long thingy?" " It's ..." " Get it out of here!" " This grows in a heap of planks?" " It'll do fine here." "This won't grow anywhere!" "Get out of here!" "Out!" "Steen!" "Steen the electrician." "Do you plan to place any furniture here, Mr Femte?" "Yes, that'll be a cosy corner." "That's what we had in mind." "Have you made other illegal space dispositions, Mr Femte?" " Who are you?" " Bjerrefjord." "Building control." " Yes, yes ..." " We want to let to students." "These screws are too small." "They have to be anchored   with 30-inch galvanized steel bolts fixed to the ground." "Those are the minimum requirements." "Is this Kleppe again?" " I'll register a complaint!" " I think we will do the complaining." " And this door has been mounted?" " Yes." "It's a sliding door." "Isn't it finished?" "Where is the mechanism?" " There's just this little ring." " That's just a two-inch ring." "The minimum requirement is two doors between the toilet   and the living room." "It has to be at least two inches, with lead." "This is completely insane." "Kleppe takes risks." " This is the bedroom and ..." " I can read building plans." "Aah!" "Mazda, Toyota!" "Not approved." "No normal person would walk around and bang at the walls." "Normal?" " I'm just doing my job, Mr Femte." " Yes, but ..." "Can I have that hammer, please?" "The hammer." "I want ..." " Step back, please." " Right." " I'm looking forward to the gift." " The gift?" "The gift for the building inspector." "It's an old custom." "Some homeowners have started to cut down due to mortgage restrictions." "I've had as little as six bottles." "I'm not sure it paid off." "I saw your sleeping bag downstairs." "I've been spending the night here." "A window was broken ..." "You spent the night without a certificate of completion?" " It is my house!" " Thank you very much." "Hello." " Well, are you off?" " I just need some matches." "I've got matches." "I'm fine." "You're adding some colour to your life?" "You're the first real white man I've seen for some time." "It's in your eye." " Bye." " Bye now." " You've sold the flat." " Yes." "To somebody called ..." " Seip." " How do you know?" "I hear things." "You sold it at the going rate." " No one wants to break the law." " I can't take any more." " What?" " I don't want to break the law." "There's plenty of time for that when you start building." "What are you planning to do about all those bills in your mailbox?" "We died laughing when we saw them." "I can't take any more." "Darling!" "Darling!" " Are you bathing in white spirits?" " Almost 100%." "You know, Olav, I need to talk to you." " What is it?" " You know what skalbagge means?" "No idea." "It sounds Swedish." "I give up." "Give me my bathrobe." "There must be a context." "Skalbagge ..." "What was it you said?" ""Red and blue scarabs   with white dots will make a nice and friendly kitchen."" " Was that in Femina?" " Guess what we're having for dinner." " Deer cutlets with chanterelles." " Can we afford that?" " Didn't you get money for the flat?" " The money, yes." "It was paid into one bank, then transferred to another." " You know what I did today?" " No idea." "I took a big picnic basket and went to the Seips to talk about the flat." " Did you have to?" " They have such a sad life." "That's true." " You mustn't be cross." " Nothing to be cross about." "I told them they could move in tomorrow." "Tomorrow?" "Ten days early?" "Look, we've got our money, so it makes sense that they get the flat." "No way." "The building inspector was there." "All he did was shake his head." " So he won't come for some time." " We haven't even started packing!" "It has to happen sooner or later." "We would move in before the baby came." "I'm still fine, so I can help you pack." "It can't be done." "Forget about it." "It has to be done." "The Seips are moving tomorrow." "It was very hard to get a removal van." "And I got a baby-sitter." "Oh, my God." "Do you realise what you've done?" " We're moving for Femte." " For Femte?" " The furniture?" " Yes, for Femte." "We're not done here." "There must be some mistake." "Kleppe Sysiphos Builders ordered it." "Kleppe is a nice man, but he's jumping the gun a bit here." "You can go." "Here's the owner of the house, Mr Femte." "I just told him we're not finished." "So I asked them to leave." "You didn't send them on their way?" "Stay out of my removal." "We move, you build." "Get in there and do your job. ldiot!" "The staircase is a shambles." "I won't put up with it." "You can go home." "Go home!" "Home?" "All right, I'm going home." "And I don't have a phone." "Stay here!" "All right, go ahead." " Take the stuff on top first." " Yeah." " Perhaps I should give a hand?" " No, don't worry, he can manage." "Come on, I'll take it." "Just ..." "No!" "Olav, be careful with my old chairs." "Hurry up." "Mind the edge." "Don't lean on here." "Up!" "Come on." "That's it." "To the right, past the chair." "That's it. lnside, and up the stairs." "The sofa goes up here." "And the chairs." "Be careful." "This is antique furniture." " Where did you get this thing?" " I bought it from an antique dealer." "A scrapdealer, you mean." "We'll put it in the garage." "Take it down." " It has to go up." " Right." "It's going down." " Up." " Down." "Is it up, or down?" "Up." "Now that I'm lying here, I feel optimistic." "Not until now?" "You're weird." "Here we are in our own house." "With a fire and all that." "At least we've moved in." "Sort of." "Listen ..." " What if the water broke right now?" " I worry more about the power." "I didn't mean that." " That water?" " Yes." "Wouldn't that be great?" "I could be the midhusband." "You could have the baby here, on the very day we move in." " We should actually be celebrating." " What a pity." "But I can get a little goodnight kiss all the same, can't I?" "We should sleep now." "Olav, can you smell that?" "Do you smell something strange?" "It's fresh paint." "Just go to sleep." "It's the oven." "Hello!" "Mr Femte!" "Mr Femte!" "We know you're in there." "Come out immediately." "It's Bjerreford." "Oh dear, Mr Femte." "What have you done?" "All of us in the building control department were saddened by the news." "What a disappointment after our nice talk the other day." "To think that you could let us down like this." "That's serious stuff." "What's wrong now?" "You have moved into a house without having   a temporary permit or a certificate of completion." "We live here now." "That's no explanation, because that's precisely what's illegal." "You don't want to throw us out?" "I mean, it's our house." "This is madness." "We'll have to initiate an eviction procedure." "We live here with our children." "Can't we get respite until this afternoon?" "We can say quarter to five, and that's final." "This is serious." "All right, quarter to five." "I'll go to town immediately." " Olav!" "Where are you going?" " To town." " Don't leave without making coffee." " Coffee?" "There's no power." " Morning ..." " What is the speed limit here?" " 50 miles." " Answer the question." "What does it say on the sign?" " 10, but ..." " 10 is right." " And that was your speed, was it?" " No, I was just reducing ..." " The sign came so suddenly." " Most signs do." " But I braked right away." " So you drove 10?" "When I spotted it, I guess I was going 11 ." " I think it was more like 12." " We take this very seriously." "Dangerous, irresponsible driving." " You'll definitely get a fine." " I was driving perfectly." "You were not driving perfectly because there is this sign here ..." " You've never checked here before." " We're here now." " I can't get fined for that!" " 5,000." " A very serious offense." " You can't fine a guy 5,000 for ..." "Either accept the fine, or buy a lottery ticket from the basket." " I can choose?" " Yes." " It's very popular." " Then I'll have a ticket." " It's for our Christmas party." " Then I'd better buy one." " How many do you want?" " Two?" " That's not enough." " Far from enough." "Most people take five." "It's extremely popular." " All right." "How much is a ticket?" " 1,000 crowns." " What?" "1,000?" " And you wanted five, yes?" "I think I'd better." "Do I have to pay now?" "The draw is tonight." "Under police supervision." "Kristine Lund Way isn't what it used to be." "But we can swap." "I've got a two-room flat." "There will be a difference of 50,000 ..." " Kleppe?" " You shouldn't have moved in." " I didn't have a choice." " We'd better speed things up." "Can it be temporarily completed this afternoon." "Well ..." "You have to find the money for the rest of the loan first." "You're quite a character, Femte." ""Dog attacked milk delivery boy." "Suffering and damages, 100 crowns."" "Do you know about this?" "And what about your attack on Treholt?" "He doesn't know much about plants, but your behaviour ..." "You'll have to pay him for damages, too." " Plants are not cheap, you know." " I'm paying for the plants?" "First the loan." "The plants will last till next year." "I doubt it." "But we have get the house finished." "We'll put Treholt on the house." "Then it'll be done in a flash." "Excuse me." "Excuse me." "Is Mr Christiansen in?" " Go to the information desk." " Over there?" "Right." "Excuse me." "I need to speak to Mr Christiansen." "You should go to the loans department." "On the other side." " Ask at the information desk." " Over there ..." " "Can I help you?"" " Yes." "Listen." "Where is the department for mortgages?" " I don't know." " I want to see a Mr Christiansen." " Is he here?" " Yes." "Do you know his place?" "He must be the new man." "Oh ... no." "He is married." " Aha." "This is the information desk?" " Yes." " So can I get some information?" " I told you I didn't know." "Olav Femte." "Olav Femte to the service desk." "Yes, Mr Femte." "I'm here." "Hello." "I thought I'd never find you." "The thing is that I've sold the flat and moved into the house,   so I would like to have the rest of the loan today." "If possible." "With the final certificate, it will only take a few minutes." "I have to see the certificate and talk to the head of my department." "What will happen is that you have to convert your debt,   so it would be nice if our assessors got a statement of   any debts on your balance." "Because it wasn't too fine, if you'll allow the expression." "May I see the conversion agreement I gave you some time ago?" "You've got it with you." "Great." "And this must be the certificate ..." " No, it's a lottery ticket." " If you don't pay ..." "We don't have the certificate yet." "There are a few problems." "Pardon?" "We haven't got the certificate of completion because of a few flaws." "We haven't got electric lighting and some other minor stuff yet." "No certificate?" "And you want us to convert your construction loan?" "This is not a toy bank, Mr Femte." "You must understand ..." "You want money without a certificate of completion?" "I can fix that." "I need the money today." "Well ..." "This gentleman wants to   convert his construction loan without a certificate of completion." " He comes here and wants to ..." " It's not ..." " No money, no house." " I understand that." "I could present the matter to my father,   but I think he will laugh himself to death." " Have you come to inspect?" " Not bad." "Things are moving ahead today." "My, Kleppe really put things in motion, I see." "Not only Kleppe." "We all work together for the common good." " It's solid stuff." " It's a most solid ... construction." "An elephant could walk on it." "If you want an elephant to walk on it." "Where does it go?" "We were told to make this and put it on the foundation." " But where does it go?" " Here." " But what is it?" " Treholt, have you got the plans?" " This should be interesting." " We're thinking of a crossbeam." "And we'll put it across ..." "I can't hear what he says." " But where does it go on the house?" " Says it right here." "Specification." " Aren't you carpenters?" " We got a specification." "I'm going to have to check this." "Properly." "Don't do anything until I come back." "Kleppe!" "Kleppe!" "What do you want?" "Mind the side of the boat!" "This drawing ..." "What is it for?" "Trygve is working on it right now." "Come aboard." "Be careful." "That cost me 980 crowns!" "Come on." "But be careful, don't scratch the boat." "Get out of the water." "Dry your legs." "Remember that you must board a ship on the leeside." "Stand still." "Where is the drawing I brought?" "The building has come to a stop." "Why are they making this?" "I've been looking for this." "This is a drawing for a barn." "I'll get you a bathrobe." "Stay here." "I don't want my boat ruined by sea water." "This is some boat, Kleppe." "You must make a packet." "Here." "About the money:" "I don't have any, Mr Femte." "I trade." "I got this boat for a flat in Gyldenløve Street." "I haven't got enough cash to buy half a bottle of schnapps." "Money only means paying tax." "You should play Monopoly more often." "Come on, I'll teach you a couple of tricks." "In Monopoly ..." " This thing is in my garden ..." " We'll talk about that later." "Monopoly is about trading." "Yesterday I had Reading Railroad, but ..." "Of course." "Listen to this first." "Reading Railroad doesn't make money." "So I had to trade." "But with what?" " I traded with Park Place." " Boardwalk, darling." "May I introduce my wife?" "Mr Femte." "This is Miss Sørensen." "Well, cheers." " It's right in there." " Here?" "Are you out of your mind?" "I'm doing business here and ..." " Where is the handle?" " He thought the shower was the loo." "A towel for Mr Femte, please, Miss Sørensen." "One more thing:" "The house has to be finished today at five." " All right." "You take the element." " Do you want me to pay for it?" " It could be your garage roof." " I have a garage." "A carport, then." "You buy the thing, I get the work started immediately." " And it'll be finished at five?" " Of course." "Trust me." "I've never let anyone down." "I'll put everybody to work." "The dinghy is on the other side." "A towel for Mr Femte." "I've moved the dinghy to this side!" "Pull up the steps while you're down there, Miss Sørensen." "I can't get up!" "Help!" "Help!" "Hello?" "Hello?" "My name is Mrs Rognerud." "I live just down the road." " I thought I'd pop in and help." " Would you like a cup of coffee?" "Perhaps we shall see you at our club?" "We collect money to build a church down on Sølvbygger Way." "Not a kindergarten?" "That might be necessary." "Poor you, being pregnant again." "You should keep an eye on your son." "He's been on the roof all day." " What did you say?" " He's on the roof by the chimney." "Simen?" "Simen?" "Shall I put the kettle on?" " Simen!" "Come down this instant!" " No!" " Come down!" " No!" " You will, too!" " No." "I've been here all night." "Who told you you could park here, Høydahl?" "This is my property." "I had to polish the car, and this is the only spot where there's no sun." " I'm fed up with your Beetle." " You can call the house Shadowland." "Ha-ha!" "That silly jacket." "I've got a new pocket for the autumn hunt." "See?" "You can put money in there too, if you have any." " Which I assume you don't." " Finish up and get out of here." " You still have the car?" " Yes." "For the time being." "It'll probably go as soon as the power comes." "Get off my property!" "You kill me!" "Hi." "What happened to that huge dancefloor out there?" " What have you done with it?" " Trygve has ..." "Trygve put it behind the house." "25, 30, 35, 37." "It's been 37 minutes." " Who the devil has ..." " Did you hear what I said?" "Now what?" "People are such idiots!" "Using things like ..." "You can't have a thing like this!" "I told you loud and clear that   when we connect here, it will mess up the whole house." "Here I am without a cistern lid." "What a way to start this shitty job." "I was at home having a nice time, then this pops up." "Look at this." "Have you seen anything like it?" "It's totally stuck." "I can't have that." "People nowadays ..." "There's something wrong with the cistern. lnside ...." "It's ... crooked." "I just have to ..." "Well I'll be!" "There." "That's taken care of." "You see, people nowadays ..." "If I'd been dumb enough to connect, the whole thing would have flooded." "I don't want any part of that." "I've warned you now." "For example, you've got a little one coming." "Congratulations." "Remember what it says on the back of those damn nappy bags." "Don't use that crap." ""For disposal in the toilet."" " That's nice." " Nice?" "You know what happens?" "Babies don't piss that much, so the nappy swells up in the toilet." "We had a woman here who used nappies like that." "We had to dig up the whole garden." "It was all clogged up." "It was full of lumps." "We tried the plunger but it was no good." "So be careful." "With the hair, too." "It give us so much trouble" " Women who brush and brush." " I never do." "We'll see." "Just call and I tell you, no!" "I'll tell you right now." "If you don't follow the specifications, " " I'm not coming." "Then you might as well put in one of those ..." "Chemical toilets." "One of those bash and carry jobs, as they call it." "Why are cashiers at a cash and carry afraid to go to the loo?" "They're afraid of loo-ters." "That was a good one!" "I'll just flush, then I'm done." " Have you ever heard such drivel?" " Is he gone?" " There's no socket here either." " That's right." " Hasn't the electrician been here?" " He doesn't exist." "How can you cope with the kids without me or electricity?" "Mummy!" "Mummy!" " What is it, Simen?" " Say drum, mummy." " Why?" " Just because." "Drum." "I can see your mummy's bum." "Femte!" "Femte!" " Hello." " I think the electrician's here." "Oh, yes." "Wait!" "Wait!" "Thank God I finally caught up with you." "Finally?" "What do you mean by that?" "Are you unhappy about something?" "Because that was a damn unfortunate remark." "I'm leaving." "No, please stay." "I'm happy that we met." " You said "finally"." " You know how people talk." " It was an unfortunate remark." " I didn't mean it." "I was just saying how I felt." "I'm not quarrelsome, but if you say things like that, I'll leave." "Nice wallpaper." "Shame I have to ruin it." "No!" " I have to put the socket here." " You can't tear off the wallpaper." " Do you want light, or wallpaper?" " Light." "There's another thing I've been wondering about in the bathroom." " I don't get any light here." " In the bathroom?" " I don't get any light." " No?" " The ceiling light's connected." " I can't see a switch in here." " There is no switch." " No switch?" "You've been looking for the switch?" "I've made something special from an electronics fair in Germany." "When I drove a rally, I visited Deutsche Electronics." "To turn on the light, you need the ceiling fitting,   which I've connected directly to the hot tap." "You see?" "So to switch on the light in here, you just do this." "Clever, eh?" " A tap can't be a light switch." " It's all the fashion in America." "I can't have that." "Surely you understand." "Conservative, are you?" "Having trouble getting into new things?" " You can't turn the tap to ..." " Most people will like it." "I can't have this." "You must understand." "Sure." "My wife didn't want one either." "People are so conservative." "But if you want a switch, you get a switch." " I'll refit it." " Great." "Thank you very much." "Mr Femte?" "It's fixed now." "It was stupid of me to connect the light to the hot tap." " Yes, it was a bit silly." " Yeah. impractical and expensive." " I still don't see a switch." " For the ceiling light?" "I've connected it to the cold tap instead." "Look." "Let there be light." "The next day it rained." "Offe ..." "Olav, it can happen any minute now." "I know." "Any minute now the inspector can throw us out." "Nothing works in here." "And it's your fault." "You gave Seip the flat far too early." "You should've thought of that." "We're talking at cross purposes, Olav." "What?" "Why didn't you say so?" " I did." " You can't just stand here." " Here, easy." " There's no danger now." " We just have to hurry." " Come with me." "We'll go to the car." "Easy ..." "I'll take care of it." "Mr Femte!" "What do you think?" "The house turned out nice, eh?" "I guess it will, but it isn't half done yet." "I'm here to collect the remainder of the loan." " I need a certificate of completion." " And the house is not complete." "Trygve won't work without pay." "Two months without wages is a long time." " Trygve's pay is not my problem." " No ..." "But you can't move in without a certificate of completion,   and Trygve won't work without pay." " What can we do about that?" " Trygve is a very reasonable man." "I promised he could have your car." "That should take care of it." "You can't take our car." "We have to get to the maternity clinic." "You can borrow it to drive to the clinic." "Trygve!" "It's all fixed." "You had to bring that thing." "Even the colours are fine." "You look good in the green tent." "Will you answer that, Olav?" "It's probably some kids." "Take the biscuit tin with you." "This is totally messed up." "Can you rewind it?" "I'll answer the door." "Merry Christmas." "Good evening." "We're from the Daily News." "Sorry to disturb you, Mr Femte, but as I'm sure you've seen   on the news earlier, the airport planning commission ..." "We'll start again, guys ..." "Good evening, Olav Femte." "We're from the Daily News." "As you've seen,   the airport planning commission decided today   that Norway's biggest airport will be built right here." "The main runway will be right where your house is." "As the affected ..." "Let's start again from there ..." "Since you are the only one affected by the position of the new airport,   we were wondering what your reaction ..."