"...but if you could just help me out here I promise.... 105." "105?" "Get her into the bath." "He won't be there." "Susan." "Susie." "Cold." "I know." "Hang on." "Susan, stay with me." "Susan." "Susan!" "She said that she saw a man in her bedroom." "Are you cold?" "Okay, swing it." "Yes, it's clear." "Let's give her O2." "Ten liters." "Tap her right away." "How's her breathing?" "No pulse or rhythm." "Are you God?" "No." "My name is Seth." "Home." "Can Mommy come?" "No." "She won't understand." "...someday." "Yes." "What did you like best?" "Pajamas." "She definitely knew what she liked." "Pajamas?" "Flannel, with feet." "Pajamas." "Excellent choice." "What else?" "...but it made her turn and look at him in such a way...." "And they...?" "Yes." "It was a good day." "Touch?" "No." "Yes, you do." "Occasionally." "Yes." "Touch." "It's never 20 minutes." "My ass on a stool all day." "She always gets the good chair." "Six pounds, four ounces." "My daughter has a daughter." "Ah, shit!" "Jesus, wake up!" "Wake up!" "Angels aren't human." "Tell her the truth." "I told her." "She said, "What good would wings be if you couldn't feel wind on your face?"" "On the 101 through downtown L.A., no delays...." "Shit!" "Jesus!" "This diagonal looks tight." "Who cathed him?" "Rosenberg." "Be right in." "The patient wants to meet you." "He's pretty out of it." "The doctor's here." "We're just going to cool to 32 today." "Sucker." "Jimi." "Vein." "Three unassisted steps." "You failed as a father already." "How does that feel?" "Retrograde on." "We're clamped and off bypass." "Oh, shit." "Bummer." "Got it!" "Getting an attitude?" "Shit!" "V-tac!" "Charge to 2." "Charging 200." "Dr. Rice." "Clear!" "Buzz him again at 300." "Kill the alarm!" "Knife." "lnternal paddles." "Charge to 20." "Ready." "Hit it." "Go to 30." "No response." "Come on." "Don't do this." "He's not going anywhere." "Come on, don't do this!" "Damn it, come on!" "Tom!" "Come on!" "Mrs. BaIford?" "Where's the doctor?" "I'm the doctor." "I'm sorry." "How is he?" "He didn't survive." "What?" "Wait." "I'm sorry, I don't understand." "A what?" "I'm sorry." "Excuse me." "I'm sorry." "What did you say?" "What?" "Oh, my God!" "I'm sorry." "A graft occlusion?" "What?" "It was textbook." "It was textbook." "I'm so sorry." "How did I get so small?" "I should've massaged longer." "I should've gone back on." "Massaged longer." "I lost it." "I lost it." "Have you ever been seen, Cassiel?" "No, not by me, and not by the dying or the delirious." "Have you ever been seen... ln a diner once, a blind woman turned to me all of a sudden..." "But she was blind." "But she knew I was there." "That doctor in the operating room she looked right at me." "No one can see you unless you want them to." "Why do you want her to?" "To help her." "Open it now!" "Everybody down!" "Do it!" "Do it!" "Do it!" "Relax." "I'm doing it, okay?" "I'll never see my grandkids again." "What am I doing?" "Just be cool." "Be cool." "Be cool." "Holy shit!" "They don't need to see us." "You're early." "What's going on?" "Ferris was looking for you." "They canceled it." "Sheffield." "Maggie, you're sick." "I'm not sick." "It is unprofessional, and it embarrasses me in front of my staff." "I saw the chart on BaIford." "It wasn't your fault." "I know." "Then what's the problem?" "I don't know." "You put up a terrific fight." "We fight for people's lives, right?" "Don't you ever wonder who it is we're fighting with?" "You're tired." "You have moments." "Why didn't you call me?" "You never sleep whether I stay over or not." "You're good." "You know it." "Doctor?" "I'll see you." ""...she begins to pull away from the awareness she had once.... "" "What if I screamed?" "What if ljust screamed right now?" ""When a woman decides to sleep with a man.... "" "...as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen." "...it was as though a young person had died for no reason. "" "The "G" is soft, like "messenger."" "What?" "Am I slobbering here?" "Continue to eat like this I'd be sucking carrots through a straw in my arm." "What happened?" "I ain't "the procedure." My name is Nathan Messinger and I'm right here." "Hello, hello, hello...." "Floating, floating." "Don't pop it." "Don't pop it!" "Do you know the Muffin Man, the Muffin Man, the Muffin Man?" "...hide." "From what?" "Never date a man who knows more about your vagina than you do." "Poor little guy." "What's wrong with him?" "No insurance." "...from drug exposure to diabetes." "We got nothing." "May I?" "You hear a murmur?" "Worth a shot." "Okay, baby." "So what are you hiding from?" "My patient's wife." "...and that I have every confidence I suddenly have this feeling that none of this is in my hands." "Nothing." "...what do I do with that?" "Excuse me." "Are you a visitor?" "Yes." "Hours." "Doesn't it help the patient to be visited?" "Who are you visiting?" "Mr. Messinger?" "Right now?" "You." "No." "I'm one of the doctors here." "Are you in despair?" "I lost a patient." "You did everything you could?" "I was holding his heart in my hand when he died." "Yes, he was." "He is living." "Just not the way you think." "How did you know my name?" "What's yours?" "Seth." "You better get out of here, Seth or security's going to think you're a psych patient." "Where are we?" "Down a liter." "I am stuck on Band-Aid brand 'Cause Band-Aid's stuck on me" "No dying now, Mr. Messinger." "Not until you give me Seth's phone number." "I am stuck on Band-Aid brand 'Cause Band-Aid's stuck on me" "Those eyes." "The way he looked right down into me." "Seth." "What kind of name is Seth?" "I thought you'd be here." "My transplant tanked at 2 a.m." "You okay?" "You might want to return this." "What?" "I didn't give you this book." "You didn't?" "Where'd you get it?" "I can tell you when." "All right, give me 5 minutes." "Hello, Maggie." "Weird is nice." "You like Hemingway?" "Yeah, I'm starting to." "May I?" "...and their faint metallic taste I lost the empty feeling..." "He never forgets to describe how things taste." "I like that." "I live here." "What do you do?" "No, I mean, your work." "I'm a messenger." "No, I'm a messenger of God." "Got a message for me?" "You've definitely been beeped." "The operation went really well." "Yeah, I didn't kill anybody today." "You're an excellent doctor." "How do you know?" "That's pretty flimsy evidence." "Close your eyes." "It's just for a moment." "What am I doing?" "You're touching me." "Touch." "How do you know?" "Because I feel it." "You don't trust it enough." "Let's go somewhere." "Where?" "I don't care." "Anything." "What's that like?" "Describe it." "Like Hemingway." "...a pear." "I don't know what a pear tastes like to you." "...juicy." "Soft on your tongue." "Grainy like sugary sand that dissolves in your mouth." "How's that?" "It's perfect." "The first time I looked in a microscope, I knew I wanted to be a doctor." "Okay, let me have your hand." "We'll take a look at your blood." "Not a possibility." "...is 9 times higher than a man's." "Take a look at that." "That's bright." "That's me." "All those cells." "That's all you are." "That and all the space in between." "...these cells..." "I don't know." "I think so." "What?" "The enduring myth of Heaven." "But you didn't?" "No." "Because something happened in my O.R. and I got bigger out there." "Something bigger than me, bigger than you, and it...." "No." "...and I couldn't fix him." "That's not supposed to happen." "And I...." "You cried." "Yeah." "I mean, what happens physically?" "Why?" "Why do they overact?" "I don't know." "Your mind and your feelings become too powerful." "Your body weeps." "Don't go anywhere." "Stay right there." "It's because the tube is blocked." "How you feeling?" "I'm afraid your bodysurfing days are over." "You got a mean tattoo going there." "What does your wife think of that?" "That is my wife." "Check his vitals every 1 5." "I can't see you, but I know you're there." "Go back and tell them that I'm not going." "Not yet." "Oh, shit." "I totally forgot dinner." "Dinner?" "With who?" "What else?" "What?" "How about some olive oil?" "Rosemary." "So what did you and your friend-- What did you say his name was?" "What did you two talk about?" "Dying." "I hope you won't become a surgeon who prays in the O.R." "Jordan, I can't go camping now." "Doing what?" "Just being here." "Nothing but us." "What do I do?" "Just look at me." "You can't do it." "You flinched." "You lose!" "You cheat." "That old black magic called Iove." "Welcome back." "We've been talking to mothers who are members of the KKK." "You want to watch anything?" "Me neither." "How do you know when I'm here?" "I know." "Jeez, you look good." "I forgot how good everybody looked." "I got to tell you, I feel fine." "Unless...." "Could it be the doctor?" "Sure." "The doctor." "This is what they call "serendipitous."" "Thank you." "Set me up." "Guess I should introduce myself." "Come on, give me your hand." "Put it in mine." "There you go." "There you go." "Good grip." "...former celestial body, recent addition to the human race." "I don't believe you." "You hang out at a library." "You're doing it." ""Some things are true whether you believe them or not."" "To fall to Earth." "You just make up your mind to do it and you do it." "...so it's all real confusing and painful, but very, very good." "Human." "Listen, kid:" "Which gift?" "Free will, brother." "Free will." "Couldn't get a job." "No l.D." "Then one day, I was walking past a building site." "And I thought, "l could do that."" "That makes me uniquely qualified." "I'm good at it." "These things'll kill you." "Are there others?" "Others like you?" "You see them, but most of the time you just walk on by." "Then why'd you do it?" "...her stupid husband, Frank..." "Petie's 4, Hannah's 6." "And this is my wife, Teresa." "Did you..." "I started to try once or twice." "Do what?" "It's too much for them." "People don't believe in us anymore." "And sunset, yes." "Take me there?" "Can you hear it?" "No." "But you can't feel this!" "Nathan!" "Not until I catch the big wave." "Wait." "Wait for what?" "Swim!" "Fall?" "Dive." "You make up your mind to do it..." "And when you wake up, you're...?" "Yes." "To smell the air." "Taste water." "Through your teeth." "To feed the dog." "Touch her hair." "What are you waiting for?" "There is so much beauty up here." "Yes." "Here you are again." "His family's having a kind of a welcome-home party." "Will you be going?" "Will you be going?" "He told me." "Do you love him?" "Love?" "I don't know." "I was hoping you could tell me." "It's a word that describes a chemical react" "It's just crap." "I'm full of crap." "What do you want to know?" "Why won't you give me your phone number?" "No." "Are you homeless?" "No." "Are you a drummer?" "Why don't you ever touch me?" "I don't want to hurt you." "You won't hurt me." "Did you feel that?" "If I could make you understand...." "I understand." "I'll see you around." "Hey, Doc!" "No, give me the whole package." "Come here." "You look great." "Look at this." "Come on, let's meet some people." "You got an appetite?" "Have a beer, Seth." "Where you from?" "North." "Uh, Canada." "Listen." "Can you hear?" "I'm growing." "Smile, Hannah." "How long have you known Seth?" "Not very long." "Honey, that hurts." "You're just like Grandpa." "Come on." "Can I help you?" "Yeah, great." "How did you two meet?" "He works with me over at the site." "Construction work." "..."hyphenates."" "I'll be right back." "Here, can you cut this up?" "I wasn't born in Canada." "What are your parents' names?" "No parents." "Very pale hands." "Let me see." "No." "I don't." "Plate." "Seth Plate?" "I cut you." "I cut you." "I cut you with that knife." "I felt it go in." "You felt it." "Not the way you do." "The way a human does." "I have no sense of touch." "You freak!" "Who" " What are you?" "I came to take Mr. BaIford and I saw you." "I couldn't take my eyes off you." "How you fought for him." "And you looked right at me when you cried for your patient." "And I touched you." "Remember?" "Why are you doing this?" "Because I'm in love with you." "I don't believe you." "Do you feel that?" "You don't want to believe me." "I cannot conceive of it!" "Just get out!" "Get out!" "Doctor?" "Doctor?" "Hello?" "Seth?" "Are you here?" "I want to see you." "Let me see you." "Just stay." "Just stay until I fall asleep." "Oh, yes!" "Thank you." "The baby can't sleep." "I don't know." "Let's check him out." "Choanal atresia." "How did you know?" "I just knew!" "Maggie?" "Are you alone?" "Yeah." "Pretty intuitive call on the baby." "Think so?" "Well, that's a compliment." "What are you doing?" "I'm spending time with you." "Will you marry me?" "We can finally get up to Tahoe." "...honeymoon and be back before we miss a case." "We belong together." "We're the same species." "I'm not very good at matters of the heart." "I mean the proverbial heart." "Please be my wife." "Just think about it." "Breathe in." "Breathe in." "I'm good." "I don't understand a God who would let us meet, if we could never be together." "He didn't tell you." "Tell me what?" "No, I'm asking you." "...no pain no hunger." "He hears music in the sunrise." "He loves you that much." "I don't understand." "...one of us." "It's up to you." "How do you know this?" "Because I did it." "Seth, I need to talk to you." "Seth, please." "Please be here." "God, help me through this." "You are so beautiful." "You'll always be that way." "...and get married." "He knows me." "You don't love him." "He and I are the same." "And I want that." "And I want somebody who can feel my hand when I touch him." "You felt me." "I want to say goodbye." "I don't want to see you again." "Hey, buddy." "Do you see me?" "Do you see me?" "Can you see me?" "We can see you." "ls this blood?" "Red?" "ls it red?" "Color." "What color were the drugs you took?" "Better get your butt out of here." "You got somewhere to go?" "Maggie." "Down and down and down I go" "Round and round and round I go" "Round and spin" "Loving that old black magic called love" "Love!" "Hi!" "I was wondering if you could tell me how to get to the county hospital?" "I'll just take a moment to catch my breath." "Breath!" "Maggie Rice." "Are you a patient?" "Do you know where she is?" "No, sir, I do not know where she is." "You have this computer and all this technology." "Can't you look her up?" "Where's Maggie?" "So you're a friend of Maggie's?" "It's okay." "I fell." "Evidently." "Off a train?" "I fell in love." "Please help me find her." "Wait!" "Cassiel." "Are you there?" "Hello." "Where you headed?" "Tahoe!" "Tahoe!" "I'm going to Tahoe." "Hop in." "We'll figure it out when we get there." "Am I too late?" "Too late?" "Jordan?" "I couldn't marry Jordan." "I'm in love with you." "What happened?" "Free will." "I feel you." "Do you feel that?" "Yes." "And that?" "How's it feel?" "Tell me what it feels like." "I can't." "Try." "Warm." "Aching." "It's okay." "We fit together." "We were made to fit together." "I always asked the dying what they liked best about living." "Wrote it down in my book." "This is it." "This is what I like best." "You haven't even started yet." "We have our whole lives together." "Mr. and Mrs. Plate." "Please stay with me." "I'm scared." "I screwed up." "You will." "You came all this way." "I'm sorry." "God, no, Maggie!" "To touch you and to feel you." "Do you know how much I love you?" "Keep looking at me, okay?" "Look right in my eyes." "Someone's out there." "ls this what happens?" "Yes." "This is what happens." "I'm not afraid." "When they ask me what I liked the best it was you." "God!" "I can't see you, but I know you're there." "I'm sorry." "Get out." "No." "Why did He do this?" "What do you want me to say?" "Am I being punished?" "You know better than that." "That's life." "You're living now." "And one day you'll be dying." "What's it like?" "What?" "Warmth." "It's wonderful." "If you'd known this was going to happen would you have done it?" "I would rather have had one breath of her hair one kiss of her mouth one touch of her hand than an eternity without it." "One." "Subtitled by:" "GELULA  CO., INC."