" Hi, Frank!" " Who are you greeting?" "You have to keep time and say hallo?" "You got us imprisoned and now you want to kill us?" "Hold the hammer!" " I'll keep time." " Johnny, I've got a hernia." " Do as I say." " It's heavy." "Sheriff!" " Sheriff!" " What is it?" "Can we have another wedge holder?" "This is the 5th this week." "You're using them all up." "It's Jack's fault." "You're really making us look bad!" "Stop it!" "One of you will be the wedge holder." "Get rid of this rubbish." "Look what you've done!" "You've ruined my T-shirt." "It wasn't fashionable any more." "I was only joking!" " Very funny!" " Get the wedge." "I can't be a wedge holder." " Go over there." " I've got arthritis." " Don't argue!" " I've got arthritis in my hands." "I'll cure it!" "I hope I miss!" " Are you ready?" " Aim carefully." "Come on!" "Saved by the siren!" "You can thank heaven." "We have to do 50 years and you're laughing?" "I thought of a joke that made me laugh." "Tell us it so we can laugh too." "Well..." "Hey, listen!" " There's this coloured guy." " What colour was he?" " A coloured guy!" " Red?" "Green?" "A black guy!" "I'm not telling you it any more." " Go on." " No!" "Let him tell it." "A black guy knocks at the door of a night club." "I know." "It's the one where they open a spy hole..." "The joke you're telling is good, but that's not the one." " What's the one about the spy hole?" " I'm telling another joke!" " Tell another joke." "Don't interrupt." " All right." "A black guy knocks at the door of a night club." "Is that the one where he goes to another night club later?" "Yes." " But let me tell it!" " When do we laugh?" " At the end." " It's a joke and you laugh at the end." " I'm getting bored!" " You can wait." "They've given you 30 years, you can wait a while." "Then I'll wait." " Why did they give him 30 years and us 50?" " Johnny!" " I'm telling a joke!" " Sorry." "I hate this joke!" "This bloody black guy is waiting 2 hours outside this shitty club!" "The porter says to him..." " You can't come to this club." " Johnny," " you tell it so well!" " I'll kill him!" " The black guy says..." " You don't know who I am." "You don't know who I am!" "Johnny, you're great!" "The porter says..." " Look at that girl in the red skirt." " I'm killing myself laughing!" " Then that's not the one." " Is there an elephant that speaks English?" "Johnny, you're really good!" "Calm down, Ald." "Saved by the siren!" " The siren saved you!" " Ald!" " What?" " Everything's fine, sheriff." " The siren saved you!" " Ald!" "Leave him alone!" "Leave him alone, Ald!" "Get up." " Let's go!" " How does the joke end?" "If you break rocks in the morning, in the afternoon you dig holes." "If you dig holes in the morning, in the afternoon you break rocks." "If in the morning you break your balls, you do it in the evening too!" "This is not a re-educational programme." " You're right." " Ald." " Tell the joke." " But don't interrupt me." " The black guy goes to this club." " Enough of these jokes!" "Shut up and dig!" " I hate him." " So do I." "I can't stay here." "Hey, I've got an idea, boys." " What?" " Let's run away." " What a great idea!" " Let's run away!" "I can't stand it here." "This is the idea:" "Jack, you're hurt." " I'm fine!" " You're hurt!" " That's not true!" " Pretend!" "I've never been so well!" " Oh, the pain!" " Sheriff!" "Jack's hurt!" "Sheriff!" "Jack's hurt!" " Sheriff!" " I heard!" "I'm coming." " Johnny!" " What the bloody hell happened?" "A scorpion..." "Let's go!" "The dogs!" " I've got a stone in my shoe!" " Let's go, Ald!" " I can't!" " Lean on me." " I can't stand it." " Walk, Jack!" "I'm scared!" " Let's go to the thicket!" " I'm scared!" "Johnny, I can feel the dogs and the sheriff's breath down my neck!" " He must have eaten something heavy." " We have to get rid of the chains." "Get ready, Jack." " Johnny, be careful!" " Don't worry." " What have you done?" " Don't make a fuss. it rebounded." " Get ready, Ald." " Your hands aren't too steady." "Let's go, boys!" " Let's go!" " Leave us here." "Save yourself, at least!" " All three of us must be saved." "Come on!" " I can't!" "The pain!" " I'll die from loss of blood." " The swamp!" "There's no way out." " I can't feel my leg any more." " I've got an idea!" "Into the water!" " I'm losing a lot of blood." " Take the cane." " Why?" " Take the cane!" "The dogs are coming and you give me a cane?" " What should I do?" " Do what I do." "The film show's over." "Prisoners go back to their cells." "Don't worry, boys!" "I've already seen the film." "I'll tell you how it ends." "Anyone not jumping is a screw!" "Anyone not jumping is a screw!" "In your bunk!" "Go to sleep!" "Bancomat, he's gone." "Tell us about the film." "We were at the point where the crocodile's about to have tea." "Imagine the next scene." "It's a river of blood." "The smell of blood attracts animals from the mountains, the seas..." "There are pumas, sparrow-hawks, condors." "A myriad of animals." "At this point you realize that the film's only a film." "Or rather, it's a film within a film." "It's as though the film..." "Enough of this row!" "Everyone in their bunks!" "If there's any more talking, there'll be no hour in the open air tomorrow." "Don't worry, boys." "You didn't miss anything!" "LIFE'S LIKE THAT A true story" "Elena, are you awake?" " How about it?" " Forget it, Giovanni." "Are you sure?" "She's sure!" "Wake up!" "Wake up!" "Crapanzano, lucky you get out today." "I've had an hour's sleep in 2 years!" " Giacomo, the coffee's getting cold." " Don't you knock?" "I was the only one Mum and Dad left any manners to." "If they'd left two houses we wouldn't be breaking each other's balls the whole time." " So you didn't sleep last night." " No, so what?" "You're almost 40!" "You can't waste time with this nursery rhyme." "This is a character-forming novel!" "Get lost!" "The coffee's ready." "Good morning." "You can live without good manners." "Perhaps." "Is there any coffee left?" " Who?" " Coffee!" "You've got hands, the coffee-maker's there, get going." "Do you think you've got a maid?" " I'll prepare some more coffee." " It's late now." "I'll have a bun and then go." "What a shame, it's the last one!" "Breakfast!" "Good morning." "At least I'll eat, seeing that I haven't slept." "Perhaps be more careful next time." "Seeing as how I'm innocent, can I have a Sicilian "cannolo" with fresh ricotta cheese and pieces of chocolate?" "Crapanzano, cover yourself." "Why do you let yourself go like that?" "Bye, Ciccio." " What are you doing?" " Getting my keys." "Am I mistaken, or do I see desire in your eyes?" "You're right." "I'm right?" " You're mistaken." " I'm mistaken." "I've got an important appointment just the same." "Good." "Bye!" "I'll see you tonight." " Hi!" "What are you reading?" " Schopenhauer." " What?" " "The World as Will and Idea."" "Plato, why don't you read a Mickey Mouse comic?" "Gaber!" "Has something happened?" " This arrived this morning." " What is it?" ""Condominium meeting..."" "It says that we have to leave by this evening." "Where will you go?" "To my cousin for now." "After that I don't know." "I'm desperate." "I'll try and help you." " Look who's here!" " Here he is!" "What a nice picture." "Hey, Africa, do the stairs look clean to you?" " I've just cleaned them." " The good life is over!" "You owe me an explanation as to why I wasn't informed about this?" "Calm down, Malcolm X!" "We'll do this." "Instead of "unanimously" we'll write:" ""15 in favour. 1 against." You!" "Giacomo, friend of the blacks!" "Bye-bye, Congo." "It was you." "You played before." "Why is everyone playing now?" "Now I'll catch whoever it was!" " Was it you?" " Wrong again." "I'm not a punch-ball!" "It was him!" " Go on!" " Come on!" "Come along." "The judge wants to talk to you." " Just when we were enjoying ourselves?" " You want to piss me off?" " I'm coming!" " They're waiting for you in court." "Keep my place!" "Can I say goodbye to Crapanzano?" "He's leaving." "All right." "I don't want to see you in here any more." " Bancomat, if you need me, call me." " Can I count on you?" "From today, I sleep on the top!" "I'll miss you." "Bancomat, I love you!" "Hey, Serpico, I'll run you down next time!" " Are you already pissed off?" " Get going, we're late." "Great!" "There's been a change of plan." " What?" " Before going to the jail," " I have to do something." " What do you have to do?" "Giacomo, you have to give me a hand." " Give me a hand!" " What are you doing?" "Did you hear my heart thumping?" " Do you know what that means?" " I'm afraid so." "How many favours have I done you?" " Should I be sincere?" " Don't be a shit!" "I'm putting my life in your hands and you're being shitty!" "Don't do that!" "For you, I would..." "Give me a kiss!" "Watch the road!" " I really love you." " Catania!" "The regulation says I can't recuperate a delinquent alone." "What a friend!" "I'd go to jail for you and how do you treat me?" "Tell me how you're treating me!" " Screw you, Giacomo." "Give me a kiss!" " Watch the road!" "Who is it this time?" "You think it's a woman?" "It isn't a woman, it's a work of art, a sculpture." "She's as beautiful as a statue by..." "I can't remember the name of a sculptor, but she's perfect." "You take the prisoner to court alone." " I can get out here." " Catania!" "Let's exchange favours." "That's life!" "Have you finished your book?" "I'm a real friend!" "I remember everything." "Give me a kiss!" "Catania, do me a favour." "Get out this car and get out of my sight!" "Out!" "That's enough!" "I'll see you here at 11:00." "Three scratches on my new car!" "Not one, three!" "The "Corriere"." "Giovanni, I've lost my wallet." "Hold the baby." "I've got an important meeting." "Excuse me!" "Ciccio!" "Your mummy will be right back." "What's the matter?" "It's all right." "I found it." "Thank you." "Madam, get your baby seen by an exorcist!" "Is this a relay race?" "Where are we going?" ""To ask is legal, to answer is courteous." We're going to court." " I never touched you!" " You held me too tight." "Can I sit in the front?" "I feel sick at the back." "At the first curve I become a hydrant!" "Sit in the front, I can keep an eye on you there." "I could have strangled you from the back." "I said "could have"." " Could you take the handcuffs off?" " You're not on holiday leave!" "You could have done it when no-one was looking." "If you don't know the right way, let's stop and ask someone." " I know the way." " It doesn't look like it." "Shut up now." "All right?" "Mother, just for me your song flies." "I'm dying of boredom!" "Can't we turn the radio on?" " What station would you like?" " Radio Super Dance or 105,5." "The only radio you can hear in here is the police radio." "How nice!" " What's the name of this road?" " Via Marcel Proust, writer." " Get the road map." " The what?" " "About Town" is in the glove compartment." " How I love you..." "Well?" "Get the About Town book." "Hurry." "Via Marcel Proust..." "We've ended up at the other end of town!" " Come on!" " How I love you!" " What are you doing?" " These words of love..." "Don't do anything crazy!" " Let's turn the radio on." " Put the gun down." " Do you tune into 105,5?" " Don't do anything foolish." " Where are we in respect to the court?" " The other side of town." "We'll stay here as long as possible." "Since I'm innocent, we'll go for a trip out of town." "You do agree, right?" "How I love you!" "Start the engine." "The ball!" "Denilson!" " No!" " I'll go." "Bye, Denilson!" "Stop!" "They've just stolen my car!" " Get out the car, you won't regret it." " I am an honest citizen." "Well done, honest citizen." "Now he'll stay there and you get going." " I'm getting out..." " Keep still." "You carry on driving." " Don't fool around, guys." " Shut up." " What's going on?" " I said shut up!" " Where are we going?" " Maria!" "I've got an appointment." "I'll get out and we'll pretend nothing happened." " If he doesn't shut up, I'll kill him!" " Let's all keep calm." " What's your name?" " Aldo Baglio." "What's yours?" " Giacomo." " Are you exchanging addresses too?" "I hate him already!" "Put the gun back where you found it and we'll pretend that nothing at all happened." " I know you're a good guy." " It's too late now." "Do as he says." "Put the gun in the holster." "Go on!" "I actually found it in the glove compartment." " What?" " Right." "The gun was in the glove compartment?" " That is none of your business." " What kind of a policeman are you?" " These things happen." " He's supposed to look after us!" " He's a good guy!" " Who trained you, Mickey Mouse?" "Listen." "You don't realize what trouble you're getting yourself into." "I'm an important person." "I had a very important appointment." " Sure, with a pediatrician!" " I don't like to boast..." " But I've got a project which..." " Who are you?" "I'm an inventor." " We've kidnapped Gyro Gearloose." " We have?" " What do you invent?" " Play things." " What?" " Toys." " What kind of toys?" " I make the surprise toys that you find inside chocolate eggs." "Scales, tops." " Get lost!" " It's big stuff!" "I have a project here which could change... it's pointless talking to you, guys." "You don't understand a bloody thing!" " What kind of criminal is he?" " I don't know." "You never know anything!" "He might be a sex maniac." "For you any prisoner is a sex maniac!" " He has the face of a sex maniac." " I can hear you!" "Do you like fooling around?" "I'll give you a quiet weekend of fear." "Stop the car." "Stop the car!" "Stop." " Take your trousers off." " What?" "Take off your trousers." "Don't mess about." "Let's keep calm and..." "Take off your trousers!" " Do what he says." " You take yours off!" " Why should I..." " He hasn't got what you've got." " It's the attraction of the uniform!" " Control your instincts!" " Take a deep breath..." " Can I stay in the car and not watch?" "Mother, just for you my song flies." "Why are you dressed as a policeman?" "If they find us, the snipers won't shoot at a uniform." "Mother, just for you my song flies!" "Give me the phone!" "Who is it?" "Who?" "Giovanni Storti?" "Who are you?" "Oh, his wife!" " My wife." " Don't touch me." "You've got the right number but the wrong person." "Or perhaps you've got the wrong number but the right person." "She told me to get screwed!" "What a character!" "Confiscated!" "In fact, eliminated." "What's this?" " Behave yourself." " I can't touch a thing in this car!" "How boring!" "Don't do anything silly, Aldo Baglio." " I know what my name is." " Put the gun down." " It's too late." " This isn't just a break out, Baglio." " This is also kidnapping." " What?" "Seizure of squad car 182." " I know." " One, eight, two." "Have you got an ictus?" "You've kidnapped two policemen and Mr Storti." ""S" as in Savona, "T" as in Turin, "O" as in..." "I know!" "Inspector, come here." " What's going on?" " It's squad car 182." "The seizure of a police car is a serious crime." " Baglio!" " Don't talk any more, understand?" "Nod your heads!" "CATALDO BAGLIO known as Bancomat." "Presently held in San Vittore prison until 15.12.2002 for counterfeiting credit cards and lottery tickets." " Are we going to Michigan?" " I can't stand this sense of humour!" " Do I go left or right?" " Go where you want but go slowly because I want to throw up." "Then I'll turn right." "I'll go onto the 171 state road." " One, seven, one." " I heard!" "One, seven, one." "It's an isolated road with no traffic." "You're helping him!" "You're giving him all these directions!" "He's right." "Don't be offended, but you're not a very good cop." "I'm not offended." "I didn't want to be a policeman." "It would have been better if you weren't!" "Keep certain things to yourself." "People don't understand." " They're private things." "Silence is better." " You know what life's like." "Sometimes you have to make decisions." " Sure." " It's like the fork we came to earlier." "You don't know where to go." "You can take the wrong road." "And you took the wrong direction." "I'd like to take the road that leads me to the one I dream about." "I'll shoot myself in the knee!" "At least I'll suffer for that!" " I've written a book." " I can't wait to read it!" "It's a novel that talks about life, about death." " It talks about men." " Don't talk!" "But my real dream..." " I don't want to know!" " ...is poetry." "That's it!" "I can't bear you any more!" "You've got on our nerves!" "That's it, now!" "Excuse me!" "That's enough!" "What time is it?" " It's 11:40." " Where is he?" "Something's happened." "I'll ruin him!" "Inspector Pezza here." "I know you're near the kidnapper and can't talk." "Don't make him suspicious." "Say: "Hallo, Mum."" "Hallo, Mum!" "Good." "We don't think the man in question is dangerous." "The experts are studying his psychological profile and they advise the maximum caution." " Say: "Mum, I'm fine, thanks."" " Mum, I'm fine!" "Catania, we still haven't traced the car." "Try and tell me where the hell you are." "Do you understand?" "I knew it!" "I knew it." "He's ruined me!" "What the hell do I do now?" "Could you do me a favour?" " Punch me in the face!" " Goodbye!" "Who knows how often you've wanted to punch a policeman." "I don't have anything on me." " I love you." " Leave me alone." "Do you realize what I was asking you to do?" "Are you a man or not?" " Leave me alone!" " Spineless!" "Che Guevara was gay!" "What did you say?" "What was that?" "You've drawn blood." "Thanks, friend!" "I love you." "Fuck you!" "But..." "That man needs help." " Don't stop." " I can't." "Pretend we haven't seen him." "HELP!" "Shit police!" "He said "shit police" to me?" " Yes." " Brake!" "Reverse." "Did you get your driving license in an amusement arcade?" " License and documents." " My wife's pregnant and about to give birth." " The car broke down." " I told you we should stop!" " I said..." " Shut up, jailbird!" "You, get out." "They didn't want me to carry out my duties." "Let's call an ambulance." " No, a helicopter." " Sure, a spaceship!" "Jailbird, put your hands here." "You are a lucky man." "You found the right person at the right moment." "You come with me." "Let's go and see this pregnant lady." " Walk in front of me." " Do you know what to do?" "Sure, I've 6 brothers." "We were all born at home without anyone helping us." " You helped with the birth of your brothers?" " No, I was the youngest." " But I have an older sister..." " You keep on talking!" "Help!" " Help!" " The next time you try and escape I'll crush your ankle bones!" "You didn't put the hand brake on." "I did." "If you're as good at brakes as you are a policeman..." " Don't worry." " Have the waters divided?" "Have you done this before?" "Go away." "My colleague and I have to talk." "Leave her alone!" " Rosalba, you're in good hands." " Go away!" "Relatives always get in the way." "Take a deep breath, ma'am." "Breath deeply and blow as though you were blowing out lots of candles." "More candles!" " More candles?" " Sure." " She has to have something to..." " Yes, candles." "More candles!" "Hey, sir!" "Come over here, please." " Are you talking to me?" " Yes." " Help free me." " They arrested you..." "I'm not a delinquent." " But they..." " Come here." "Let's change the method because she's not concentrating." "Relax all your body muscles." "Look at a fixed point." "I'm the fixed point!" "Look at me!" "That bald one isn't a policeman." "He kidnapped us." " Help me get free." " No, he's a nice man." " He's helping my wife give birth." " He's a delinquent." "Help me!" " Come nearer." " We'll talk after the baby's born." "At this point..." " Call a doctor." " What for?" "Everything's fine." "You're like a talking grasshopper!" " Damn it!" " Two lives are in your hands." "Please!" "Madam, carry on suffering!" "You come with me." "Don't listen to him." "He's a dangerous madman." " We're taking him to a criminal asylum." " He told me" " that you'd kidnapped him." " Sure!" "Did he ask you to free him?" " Yes." " You see?" "Just like that time when he slit the throat of that guy who got out the car for a smoke." " He cut a man's throat?" " Yes." " Have you left my wife alone?" " I can't be in two places at the same time!" "Why do you do this?" "Why do you keep trying to trick me?" "And while I'm operating!" " The head's out!" " All right!" "Wait a minute!" "He waited eleven months, he can wait another minute!" "Why?" "Show me your hands." "Show me your hands!" "Absolute categoric imperative." "Keep calm." " It's got "O tu o io"?" " It's a play on words." " How do you work it out?" " Read it backwards. "Aiuto", Help." " Stop it!" " I'm a public official." "Keep still." " Now I have to shoot at your hands." " Why?" "it rubs off." " This washes better than bleach." " The writing comes off." " It's born!" " It's born!" "It's born!" "I helped with the birth!" "Let's go and see." "It's born!" " He's lovely!" "He looks like the father." " What small hands!" " Tanuzzo, say hallo to your uncles." " He's a baby, not a moron!" " What am I supposed to say to him?" " You're treating him like an idiot." "Look how lovely my son is." "He looks like me." "Tanuzzo, look at the bad man." "Don't worry, he's tied up." "Tanuzzo's not scared of you." "Do you know how many babies are born in one minute?" "This has been going on for million of years." "It's the miracle of creation repeating itself..." "That's enough!" "My brain is drying up!" "Turn left." "We'll go and eat a hamburger." "You owe me 50.000 lire." "I bought six cheeseburgers and nobody ate them." "I haven't eaten like this for two years and four months." " Do you want a cheeseburger?" " No, I have a special diet." "I don't mix carbohydrates with proteins because..." "Do you have to give me a clinical report?" "I understand!" "Tomorrow..." "On the seventh day the Lord created cheeseburgers!" "How can you..." "Maria!" "What have I done!" "I've blown his face to bits!" " I've blown his brains to bits!" " I can't feel anything!" " The body already stinks!" " I don't feel any pain." "He's foaming!" "I don't feel anything." "Of course not, idiot, it's ketchup!" "You killed a bag of hamburgers!" " Look what you've done to me!" " I really got a fright." "You don't hold a gun like that." "Am I clean?" "Look at this, boys!" "It's an invention of mine, the spare T-shirt." "Voila!" "It's the project of the century." "Something's about to happen." "There are two condors, bad luck signs." "What condors?" "They're crows!" "They'll find us now." "I really cocked-up!" "Look at the state of the car, it'll easily be recognized." "Don't worry, if all the police are like him, they won't find us in three lifetimes!" "Put your foot down on that bloody accelerator!" "Accelerate, do you hear?" "Go away or there'll be a massacre!" "I'm absolutely decided." "What do they want to do, "Apocalypse Now"?" "San Filippo da Scansiano, pray for us!" "San Luigi da Norcia, pray for us!" "Why have you got it in for me?" "What have I ever done to you?" "San Fernando, pray for us!" "All the saints, pray for us!" "There's a path further on, take it." "I said accelerate and take that bloody path!" "All clear." "Go onto the dirt road." " What's wrong?" " I'm going to be sick." "Give it some gas." "If the engine stops, I'll kill you." "We can't see them." "There's a deep ravine which will stop them from escaping." "I repeat, there's no way out for them." " What do you want to do?" " Leave me alone!" "With all this space, you had to choose a cemetery?" "And with all the hostages there are, I had to choose a chatterbox!" "I've missed the appointment for the project." " Oh, no!" " What?" "There was the football match!" "That's right, Italy-Nigeria!" " Italy-Norway!" " NR, NR." "The registration letters are the same!" "I'd like to be with Crapanzano to cheer our favourite." " Baggio or Del Piero?" " "Private" Di Livio!" "He's the idol of the Sixth Wing, maybe for his innocent face." "Innocent face!" "Just like that of a serial killer I was with." "Will you leave that watch alone?" "Ciccio, this isn't an ordinary watch." "It's a Ringoboys watch, it has a radio in it." " Does the Force issue you with it?" " Listen." " Cannavaro has the ball!" " The football game!" " Is Di Livio playing?" " I don't know, it's just come on." " What's the score?" " I've just turned it on!" " You can't hear it!" " It's on as loud as possible." "We see the Norwegian team coming through." "A dangerous cross!" "A great save by the goalkeeper, Pagliuca." "Maldini passes to Del Piero, the position's right." "He's all alone, but the ball just misses the post!" "What a shame, the goalie was just ahead of Del Piero." "The blues counter-attack and Vieri scores a goal!" " Goal!" " Yes!" "Yes!" "Goal!" "You'll be world champions!" "Goal!" "If Di Livio was there we would have got lots of goals." "Rejoice!" "Hey, guys!" "Guys!" "You rabbits, pant-wetters!" "You can run off after the game!" "How can you say it's nice sleeping in a cemetery?" "We begin the programme with the sports news." "Great celebrations for Italy's victory yesterday." "Christian Vieri scored a great goal." "The Norwegian team is going home." "News:" "The escape of counterfeiter Aldo Baglio ended in tragedy together with two hostages." "There is an improvement in the conditions of Officer Catania who was beaten and left dying after attempting to disarm the kidnapper." "Baglio, Officer Poretti and hostage Storti were killed in the accident." "Aid workers were met with a horrifying spectacle." "The authorities confirmed the death of the three men." "They took me for a cheeseburger!" "Let me say something." "Aldo, I've been thinking a lot and I know that you're really a nice person." "You're not a delinquent, it's not right for you to go back to jail." "Look, they think we're dead and no-one's looking for us." "Let us go, we'll go our ways and you can do as you want." "Can you repeat that?" "It's a bit complicated." "He's right, it's a great opportunity for you." "We can say that you were the only one who died in the accident." "Think about us." "He's got a wife at home waiting." "I've got a family, a nephew." " Think how they're suffering." " He's got a nephew!" "And where will I go?" "Without money, without papers, without anyone." " But you're free." " Free from what?" "You've got a family, who the hell have I got?" " Calm down, Ciccio." " Keep calm." "At least in jail there was someone who cared about me." " So go back to jail!" " We'll take you if you like." "To jail?" "After what I've done?" "It's your fault for leaving the gun in the front compartment!" " He's right, you're an idiot." " So now it's my fault!" "He shouldn't have looked in the glove compartment." " You should keep the gun in a holster." " He put it in the front!" "You should attend a course before being taken on." " You don't understand a thing." " That's enough!" "I'm going to leave this lousy world like a dirty stain!" " Don't do anything daft." " All you can do is laugh." " Nice friends!" " Friends?" "You kidnapped us and you're threatening us with a gun!" " We're friends?" " Here!" " Enjoy your freedom for me too." " Come back!" " Don't be melodramatic." " Give me one reason not to do it." "Right now I can't think of anything, but let me think about it..." "You see?" " You're a real bastard!" " Did you think of anything?" "Free me too, don't just think of yourself." "Go on, open it." "Excuse me." "Excuse me!" "Where can I find some water for the flowers?" " Goodbye!" " Hey, look." " He's with a girl!" " Yes." "That monster's with a girl and you're not doing anything?" "He's a delinquent!" "That doesn't mean he's a rapist." "You don't understand a bloody thing about human nature." "I've wanted to say something for two days, you're an idiot!" " What did you say?" " You're an idiot." "You're talking to a public official." "Have you seen yourself?" "You're dressed like a scarecrow, because you are a scarecrow!" " What did you say?" " Keep your hands off me." "Hey, friends!" "I invited her out for dinner." "It's like celestial music exploding inside you." " I've fallen in love like a baby." " All right!" " Christ, guys!" " I'm happy for you." "Good luck." "Hey, let's keep in touch." "I need you, you can't leave me now!" "I'm shy, I haven't any experience with women." "I haven't had an occasion like this for two years." " It's the last thing I'll ask." " That's enough now." " Go on, Giovanni." " I won't change my mind." " Oh, go on, Giovanni!" " It's a condemned man's last wish." " Not even if you beg me." " Look at me, but shut up." " Say "no" when I tell you to." " No." "Wait, you weren't ready." "Shut up." " Please, Giovanni." " No, I can't." " You said yes!" " No." " You said yes." " No, I said no!" " You rascal, you said yes!" " I said no!" "Clara?" "Yes." "That's a lovely name." "When I was a baby..." "And when I say baby, I mean baby." "I had a girlfriend whose name was Francesca." " Guess what I called her?" " Clara." "No, Francesca." "Her name was Francesca." " Is something wrong?" " No, everything's fine." "It's just a bit chilly." " Good evening." " Good evening." "Just a minute." " Thank you, sir." " You're welcome, waiter." " He's giving a tip before eating!" " It's his evening." "Leave him alone." " Can't you see he's in love?" " But he's using my money!" "You've got short arms!" "You said your name was Clara." "Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom." "Waiter!" " Where's the bathroom?" " The first door on the right." " Thank you, sir." " You're welcome, waiter." " Hey guys, what do I do now?" " Pay the bill and let's go." "You're ruining me!" "What should I do?" "Giacomo, think of something." " You could do what they do in films." " Hit her in the face?" " Not that kind of film!" " I was kidding." "I meant in love films." " Did you see "Prima dell'Alba"?" " Great, but not for him." "It's the story of two young people who have just met" " and don't know what to say." " Quickly!" "So they pretend to phone a friend to tell him what they would like to say to each other." "I see, they use the telephone to give them courage." "Right." "So you pretend to phone a friend." ""Hi, it's Aldo here." "I'm in love with a girl."" " You understand?" " I'm not deaf!" " Hearing is not the same as understanding." " I can't stand him!" "Thanks, Giacomino." "You're a real friend." "I'll take this back, at least." "You carry on eating, I'm the one who's paying!" " We're in a restaurant, what should I do?" " Starters, main dish, wine!" "Would you like some wine?" "Oh, you have some already." "I'm a bit distracted." "Drinking wine brought a game to mind." " Can I play a romantic game with you?" " Sure." "I pretend to make a phone call." "I saw it in a film." " Forget it, it's stupid!" " No!" "Well, I pretend to have a phone and call a number." "Hallo?" "Peppino." " It's Peppino." " I heard." "Everything all right at home?" "I wanted to tell you something." "I've met a girl." "No, you don't know her." "Wait." " Do you know someone called Peppino?" " No." "She doesn't know you, so you don't know her either." "She's beautiful." "Blonde." "More blonde than beautiful." "I mean, both things!" "No, I'm telling you this..." "What do you have to tell me?" "Just a minute." "The parcel's arrived?" "Where did you put it?" "On the ground?" "Are you crazy putting it there?" "Peppino doesn't understand." "Excuse me." "On the ground?" "You haven't understood a thing." "I'm having problems, I don't know what to do." " I'll talk to her." " No, please." " Invent something." " Tell her some stories." " I've got a story." " Tell me it." "She'll like it, I won my wife with this one." " It's the one about the lion and the gazelle." " I don't know it." "Go back, look her in the eyes and say:" ""In Africa, every morning, a gazelle awakens."" ""it knows it must run faster than the lion or it will be killed."" ""In Africa, every morning, a lion awakens."" ""it knows it must run faster than the gazelle or it will die of hunger."" ""In Africa, every morning, you can be a lion or a gazelle,"" ""the important thing is that you start running."" " That's beautiful." " Can you remember it?" "I'll win her over with this story." "It's easy." "Thanks." "I foresee a tragedy." " Where was the place?" " Africa!" "Africa!" "In Africa, every morning, a gazelle dies." " It dies?" " It wakes up, dead already." "Evidently, it wasn't well the previous day." "However, every morning, still in Africa, a lion, as soon as it wakes up, starts running." "So that it doesn't die like the gazelle did the day before." "While running, it sees the dead gazelle and says:" ""What am I running for?" "I'll stop here and have a bite."" "However, what I wanted to say is that it isn't important if you're" "a rattlesnake or a peacock." "The important thing is that if you die, you tell me beforehand." "Are you sure you know what you're doing?" " I think it's ridiculous." " You can't change overnight." "But last night I realized a lot of things." "You meet a girl and start doing crazy things!" "You have to go slow with women." "I'm happy with my wife because I waited for the right girl." "We were engaged for eighteen years!" "And me?" "If I'm not married there's a good reason." " It's different for you." " What do you mean?" "That's it, I've decided!" "I'm going back to jail." "I want to pay my debt to society." " Giacomino, will you come and visit me?" " Sure, every week." "But you won't be in jail for long, I'll fix it." " Right, Giovanni?" " If you're going to fix it!" "Will you bring me oranges?" " It's July, where will I find them?" " The thought's enough." "Goodbye." "I can't do it!" "I'm going." "Are you sure?" " Really, really sure?" " Yes." " Really, really, really?" " I don't change my mind every 5 minutes!" "I said I was sure!" " Let's stay in touch." " Sure." " We had fun." " Let's say we did." " We can have a pizza together." " I can't, I'm allergic." " We'll eat something else." " Like what?" "All right, goodbye." "The tram's coming." " Bye." " Bye." "The funeral will take place at the St. Gregory Church." "Furnished Room to Let." "Tell me you love me." "Give me a kiss!" "Not all human beings react to pain in the same way." "An Arab woman screams, she pulls her hair." "She exaggerates." "A Swedish girl, at the most, sheds a tear." "She doesn't suffer any less, she just reacts to pain differently." "My wife's reaction was like that, I think." " Yes, a bit Swedish." " A shock of affection." " Like my sister and brother-in-law." " Well, no." "Your sister and brother-in-law are real bastards!" " What?" " As soon as they thought you were dead, they rented out your room and threw away your autobiography." " What about your wife then?" " That was a different reaction." "She thinks you're dead for one day and screws somebody else!" " It was the shock." " What shock?" " Your wife's a whore!" " Watch your language." " You make me laugh!" " So laugh then!" "My wife's a whore?" "Imagine that!" "My wife, a whore!" " Weren't you supposed to go to jail?" " I changed my mind." "Only imbeciles never change their minds." "I'll go back in my own way." "Bancomat's great return!" "I want you to meet someone." "Clara, come here!" " "The return of Bancomat"!" " Piss off!" " Hallo." " Look at their faces!" "What happened, guys?" " I'll help you." " You will?" "Yes, together with Clara." "Is that all right?" "Yes." "Sign it and put yesterday's date." "For Plato." "Come on!" " Just a minute." " Are we making fruit salad?" "There, I've finished." "No, not yet!" "Everything happens to me!" "What do you think this is, a loo?" "You bastard, are you deaf?" "I'll teach you a lesson!" "I'll kill you!" "What's all this row?" "What the bloody hell's going on?" "What is all this?" ""I, the undersigned, Giacomo Poretti, leave to Mr Faledam..."" "Samia, will you bring me the grey case?" " "All my possessions."" " A holograph will." "Incontestable!" "Yes?" " Hallo?" " Who is it?" "Crapanzano Company, we have to deliver some parcels." "I'm coming." " Good morning." " We're looking for Giovanni Storti." " He's dead." " I'm sorry." "However, all's well that ends well..." " Are you his wife?" " Yes." "Your husband won some prizes in a competition." " We have to deliver them." " What are they?" "We just do deliveries, we don't know." " If you'll sign, we'll be off." " Very well." "Will you bring them?" ""I chose the right woman"!" " I'd hit her right here!" " Go on." "Are you Jehovah Witnesses?" " Will they really hurt her?" " Are you worried about your wife?" "Crapanzano respects women." "He won't touch a hair on her head." "Maybe!" "Bancomat's got an idea!" " How exciting!" " Is this really necessary?" "Think of their faces tomorrow morning!" " What if they shut us in?" " There's Clara." "I don't think this is a great idea." "There's a switch." " They have a funeral with empty coffins?" " It's the form that counts." " It's the death ritual." " Really?" "Man is afraid of what death represents." "Death in itself can even be good, it frees one from worries." "Giacomo, that's you!" "That means..." "I'm sorry." "Come with me." "Where the bloody hell are we?" "Look there." " That's our car." " We're inside it." "It's like a "flashblack"." " Didn't I jump out?" " And didn't he stop to throw up?" "But just the same, I put the handbrake on." "What's going on?" "Haven't you understood yet?" "Try harder." " Giacomo." " Giovanni, I think..." " What?" " You got this far, try a bit harder." " Try harder at what?" " You're really thick!" "Do I have to spell it out?" "You're dead, defunct, "remote past"!" " I had to tell him!" " You knew?" " Sure I did." " Why didn't you say something?" "You have to say these things delicately." "And her?" " She isn't a hostess." " No." " You don't mean that..." " That's right." "I see." "Don't ask her to fly away or vanish." "She isn't here to play silly games, she has a job to do." " Show them what you do with your hand." " No." " What does she do?" " Nothing." " It'll only take a minute." " No." "She puts her hand here and it goes through her." "Not now!" "This isn't the right moment." " Shall we go?" " Where?" " Giovanni, make an effort." " My legs feel weak." " It had to happen sooner or later." " Better later!" " Resign yourself." " But my legs feel weak, how can I?" "Do you know what I really mind about all this?" "That I didn't leave a little Giacomino behind." " Humanity will be grateful to yo for that." " What do you mean?" "Have you looked at yourself?" "Anyone looking at you gets the shivers!" "Life's strange." "One minute you're here and the next you're gone." "If you'd checked the handbrake, we'd still be there." "I'm not a mechanic, I'm a policeman." "Policeman!" "Policeman!" "Go on!" "You mean behind that..." "Go on!" "Aldo, go on." "Let's go." " But..." " I've got a telepass." "What about us?" "He's a witness, I did everything I could." "But I couldn't do it." " You have to wait a while." " What do you mean?" "He goes and we don't?" "What have we done?" " What's that?" " Read it." "What is this?" "But that's all pardonable stuff!" "Show me." " Who'd have thought you were such a rascal!" " Mind your own business." "You mean that we stay here and Aldo goes through?" "He's already done two years and four months of purgatory." "See you soon!" "We'll see each other up there." "I falsified these, try them." "Quick." "Hurry!" " Let's go!" " We weren't even struck by lightening!" "Come on!" " Ciccio?" " It was too good to be true!" " My clothes." " I only borrowed them." "Who knows what you thought!" "Are you walking around like that because of me?" "I saw you there and thought you wouldn't be going anywhere else." "It's strange the way you can think things will go." "Are you offended?" "However, all's well that ends well." "I thought you were thinner, all the clothes fitted me!" "But what's yours is also mine, we're all brothers here." " You're making us look really bad!" " There are only honest people here." "If it wasn't for me, you'd still be outside." " It's lovely here." " It's more than that." " It's magnificent!" " More than that." "There's that atmosphere that the novels of the 1800s had, where the relationship between man and nature was..." "Giacomino!"