"* I'M GOING DOWN TO SOUTH PARK *" "* GONNA HAVE MYSELF A TIME *" "* FRIENDLY FACES EVERYWHERE *" "* HUMBLE FOLKS WITHOUT TEMPTATION *" "* GOING DOWN TO SOUTH PARK *" "* GONNA LEAVE MY WOES BEHIND *" "* AMPLE PARKING DAY OR NIGHT *" "* PEOPLE SPOUTING "HOWDY NEIGHBOR" *" "* HEADED ON UP TO SOUTH PARK *" "* GONNA SEE IF I CAN'T UNWIND *" "* ( mumbling ) *" "* COME ON DOWN TO SOUTH PARK *" "* AND MEET SOME FRIENDS OF MINE *" "( male announcer ) THE YEAR IS 2006 !" "AND YOUNG ERIC CARTMAN CANNOT WAIT" "FOR THE NEW NINTENDO Wii TO COME OUT." "UNABLE TO COPE WITH THE WAIT ANY LONGER," "ERIC DECIDES TO FREEZE HIMSELF FOR THREE WEEKS." "BUT A FREAK AVALANCHE MAKES ERIC IMPOSSIBLE TO FIND" "AND SO HE REMAINS FROZEN FOR 500 YEARS." "( * "Buck Rogers" theme * )" "GRARRHGHGH !" "WHOA, STEADY..." "THIS WAY, OTTERS !" "THIS IS IT, NEW, NEW HAMPSHIRE." "WE HAVE RISKED MUCH BRINGING YOU HERE, TIME CHILD." "CAN IT" " YOU OTTERS MAY HAVE EVOLVED" "TO THE POINT YOU CAN TALK, BUT I DON'T NEED LECTURES." "DON'T LET THE TIME CHILD OUT OF YOUR SIGHT." "HE COULD TRY TO RUN." "WE HAVE A DEAL, BLAVIUS." "AS LONG AS I GET WHAT I WANT," "YOU HAVE NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT." "BWOOK, BWOOK !" "SOMETHING IS SPOOKING THE OSTRICHES." "SURE, THIS IS MONARCH LAND NOW." "PROBABLY JARVIS PROBES EVERYWHERE." "HERE IT IS, WE HAVE ARRIVED !" "HOLD !" "THIS IS IT, TIME CHILD-- THE OLD MUSEUM OF TECHNOLOGY." "ABANDONED LONG AGO." "LET'S GET WHAT YOU WANT, TIME CHILD" "AND GET OUT OF HERE." "OVER HERE !" "YES, HERE" " IT'S HERE !" "THE NINTENDO Wii..." "I'VE WAITED..." "SO LONG FOR THIS !" "ALRIGHT, TIME CHILD" "WE FILLED OUR SIDE OF THE BARGAIN." "NOW RETURN WITH US TO OTTER BAY." "SORRY, BLAVIUS, I'VE GOT OTHER PLANS." "NOOO !" "IT WAS A TRICK !" "SCIENCE DAMN YOU, TIME CHILD !" "I GOT IT, I GOT THE Wii !" "TIME CHILD, YOU'VE RETURNED !" "WE THOUGHT FOR SURE YOU HAD DIED" "IN THE THOBART PLANT !" "YEAH, LUCKY FOR ME THE OTTERS BELIEVED I WAS ON THEIR SIDE." "DO ME A FAVOR." "NEXT TIME I'M IN A RECESSED BIOCAVE," "DON'T SEND ME A LEVEL TWO HOMING CALL." "T.C., WAIT !" "OH, I CAN'T WAIT !" "THIS IS GONNA BE SO AWESOME !" "GET OUT OF MY WAY !" "YOU GAINED THE OTTERS TRUST ?" "!" "WERE YOU WEARING AN INFORMATION CRYSTAL ?" "HERE." "SCIENCE BE PRAISED !" "THIS COULD END THE WAR !" "YOU'VE DONE A GREAT THING, T.C." "HOW CAN WE REPAY YOU ?" "JUST SEND A MAINTENANCE GUY TO MY ROOM !" "I WANT THIS NINTENDO HOOKED UP TO MY FLOAT SCREEN NOW !" "COME ON..." "COME ON !" "DUDE, WHAT IS TAKING SO LONG ?" "I WANNA PLAY !" "UHHHH..." "WHAT KIND OF OUTPUT DOES THIS HAVE ?" "THIS IS SOME ANCIENT, SUPER-VHS OUTPUT OR SOMETHING." "I CAN'T CONNECT IT TO YOUR FLOAT SCREEN." "THERE'S GOTTA BE SOME WAY TO HOOK IT UP !" "IT'S THE FREAKIN' FUTURE !" "IT MAY BE THE FUTURE FOR YOU" "BUT I CAN'T HOOK UP ANYTHING TO A FLOAT SCREEN" "WITHOUT AT LEAST A LASER SEVEN OUTPUT." "YOU GOTTA BE SH---IN' ME !" "SCIENCE DAMMIT !" "I AM SO F--KING SICK OF THE FUTURE !" "T.C. WHAT'S WRONG ?" "I'LL TELL YOU WHAT'S WRONG." "I'VE BEEN WAITING 500 YEARS TO PLAY THE NINTENDO Wii" "AND IF I DON'T GET TO PLAY IT REAL SOON," "I'M GONNA BUST A NUT !" "WELL, WE'RE ALL GLAD YOU'RE BACK." "I KNOW SOMEBODY WHO'S MISSED YOU VERY MUCH..." "COME ON IN K-10 !" "BARK, BARK, HELLO, ERIC !" "I HAVE MISSED YOU." "SUCK MY BALLS, K-10, I'M NOT IN THE MOOD." "FELLOW ATHEISTS, THE TIME CHILD HAS RETURNED" "WITH INFORMATION ON OUR SWORN ENEMIES," "THE ALLIED ATHEIST ALLIANCE !" "THEY HAVE STARTED DIGGING FOR CLAMS." "IN SECTOR J-7." "IF WE MOUNT AN ALL-OUT ATTACK," "WE CAN WIPE OUT THEIR FOOD SUPPLY !" "BUT, THOSE ARE CIVILIAN OTTERS." "WE CANNOT TOLERATE THE OTTERS !" "THEIR SCIENCE IS FLAWED !" "THEIR ANSWER TO "THE GREAT QUESTION"" "IS DIFFERENT FROM OURS." "YES, BUT SENDING OUT ALL OUR SHIPS AT THE SAME TIME..." "IT WOULD LEAVE OUR CITY EXPOSED." "THAT'S WHY WE HAVE TO BE SUPER-DUPER SURE" "THAT NOBODY FINDS OUT WE'RE DOING IT." "THE UNITED ATHEIST ALLIANCE" "IS ABOUT TO SEND OUT ALL ITS DEFENSE SHIPS" "TO TAKE DOWN THE ALLIED ATHEIST ALLIANCE'S" "CLAM FIELDS !" "PRAISE SCIENCE !" "THIS IS YOUR CHANCE, YOUNG SHPECK." "TO AVENGE YOUR FATHER'S DEATH." "CAREFUL, SON, JUST BECAUSE THEIR SCIENCE" "LEADS THEM TO A DIFFERENT ANSWER" "TO "THE GREAT QUESTION"" "DOESN'T MEAN WE HAVE THE RIGHT TO KILL THEM ALL." "NO, OUR ANSWER TO "THE GREAT QUESTION"" "IS THE ONLY LOGICAL ONE." "OUR SCIENCE IS GREAT." "LET US NOT FORGET THE GREAT RICHARD DAWKINS" "WHO FINALLY FREED THE WORLD OF RELIGION, LONG AGO." "DAWKINS KNEW THAT LOGIC AND REASON" "WERE THE WAY OF THE FUTURE." "BUT IT WASN'T UNTIL HE MET HIS BEAUTIFUL WIFE" "THAT HE LEARNED USING LOGIC AND REASON ISN'T ENOUGH." "YOU HAVE TO BE A DICK TO EVERYONE" "WHO DOESN'T THINK LIKE YOU." "PREPARE ALL THE TROOPS." "WE WILL LEVEL THE UNITED ATHEIST ALLIANCE" "TO THE GROUND !" "WITH NEW GLADE MONVERT CLEANER," "YOU CAN MAKE YOUR MONVERT SPARKLE LIKE NEVER BEFORE." "MY MONVERT'S NEVER LOOKED SO CLEAN !" "GOD, I HAD FUTURE TV." "THERE'S TOO MANY COMMERCIALS !" "UGHHH..." "I'M SO BORED !" "THERE'S NOTHING TO DO !" "TELL ME ABOUT IT." "HEY, I KNOW !" "LET'S CRANK CALL PEOPLE IN THE PAST !" "HUH ?" "I JUST GOT, THE CRANK PRANK TIMEPHONE !" "* CRANK PRANK *" "* CRANK PRANK TIME PHONE *" "NEW FROM ZASBRO !" "IT'S CRANK PRANK TIMEPHONE !" "I JUST DIAL A RANDOM NUMBER ON THE KEYPAD," "ENTER A DATE AND YEAR ON THE DIVILIBRATOR AND" "WOW, SOMEONE FROM THE PAST IS ON THE LINE !" "HELLO, IS YOUR REFRIGERATOR RUNNING ?" "WELL THEN YOU BETTER GO CATCH IT !" "* CRANK PRANK *" "* CRANK PRANK TIMEPHONE *" "WHAT ?" "UH, HI" " IT'S THE YEAR 1973, RIGHT ?" "COULD I SPEAK WITH AL COHOLIC, PLEASE ?" "CRANK PRANK TIME PHONE COMES WITH DIVILIBRATOR," "ANTI-MATTER FUSION CONE," "AND THIRTY BLAINE H-F WATT TRIGGERS." "WHY DIDN'T ANYBODY TELL ME HERE WAS A TIMEPHONE ?" "!" "WHY DOES IT MATTER ?" "BARK, BARK." "DON'T YOU SEE ?" "IF I GET ONE OF THOSE PHONES" "I CAN CALL MYSELF IN THE PAST" "AND TELL ME NOT TO FREEZE MYSELF !" "THEN I CAN GO BACK TO MY TIME" "AND PLAY NINTENDO Wii." "BARK, BARK !" "THAT PHONE IS FOR CRANK CALLING ONLY." "USING IT IN THE WAY YOU DESCRIBED IS ILLEGAL." "I CARE !" "WHERE'S THE CLOSEST TOY STORE ?" "WORKING, BARK BARK." "THE JARVANIAN SHOPPING COMPLEX." "BUT IT IS NOT OPEN YET." "COME ON..." "COME ON !" "STORE IS NOW..." "OPEN." "WELCOME !" "UGH, FINALLY !" "WELCOME TO ZEEBOD'S TOYS !" "I WANT ONE OF THOSE TIMEPHONE THINGS !" "AH, THE CRANK PRANK TIMEPHONE, SURE !" "NOW, I AM REQUIRED BY THE STATE TO MAKE SURE YOU KNOW" "THIS IS FOR PRANK CALLING THE PAST ONLY, RIGHT ?" "YEAH, YEAH I'M ONLY GOING TO CRANK CALL PEOPLE." "ALRIGHT, THAT WILL BE 6,000 CREDITS." "6,000 CREDITS ?" "WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE TO YOU, A THERILIUM MINER ?" "THIS IS A PRETTY ADVANCED PIECE OF EQUIPMENT." "IT'S EXPENSIVE." "LOOK, I HAVE TO HAVE ONE OF THOSE PHONES." "OH ALRIGHT, THEN I HAVE TO HAVE 6,000 CREDITS." "BARK, BARK, I'M SORRY, ERIC." "BARK, BARK." "HOW ABOUT A ROBOT, HOW MUCH FOR THE ROBOT ?" "SORRY KID, YOU'RE JUST GONNA HAVE TO" "CRANK CALL PEOPLE IN THE PRESENT." "SCIENCE DAMMIT !" "WAIT, K-10..." "CAN YOU ACCESS THIS STORE'S SALES RECORDS ?" "WORKING..." "BARK, BARK." "ACCESSED !" "I WANT THE NAME AND ADDRESS OF ANYBODY" "WHO HAS BOUGHT A TIMEPHONE FROM THIS GUY IN THE PAST WEEK." "WORKING..." "BARK, BARK." "THE UNITED ATHEIST ALLIANCE HAS TAKEN THE BAIT !" "SOON THEY WILL SEND THEIR SHIPS OUT" "TO DESTROY OUR DECOY CLAM FIELDS." "AND WHILE THEIR SHIPS ARE AWAY," "THE UNITED ATHEIST LEAGUE INTENDS TO ATTACK THEM." "OUR PLAN HAS WORKED PERFECTLY." "FOR WHEN THE UNITED ATHEIST LEAGUE" "ATTACKS THE UNITED ATHEIST ALLIANCE," "WE WILL CHARGE IN AND KILL THEM ALL !" "OUR SCIENCE, OUR ANSWER TO THE GREAT QUESTION SHALL PREVAIL !" "HAIL SCIENCE !" "HAIL SCIENCE !" "HAIL SCIENCE !" "HAIL SCIENCE !" "HAIL SCIENCE !" "HAIL SCIENCE !" "AND I WILL PERSONALLY KILL THE TIME CHILD" "AND EAT HIS ENTRAILS ON MY TUMMY !" "( phone ringing )" "I'LL GET IT, DARLING." "HELLO ?" "...HELLO ?" "UH, YES, HELLO." "I'M CALLING FOR MR. WALL." "I'M SORRY, THERE'S NO MR. WALL, HERE." "OH, IS MRS. WALL THERE ?" "NO, THERE ARE NO WALLS HERE." "THEN HOW DOES YOUR ROOF STAY UP ?" "( snickering )" "OH, I SEE." "IS THIS THE JOHNSTON BOYS FROM DOWN THE STREET ?" "NO, WE'RE FROM THE FUTURE !" "VERY FUNNY !" "HI, I'M A PEPPER, AND I'M WONDERING" "IF YOU'D LIKE TO BE A PEPPER TOO ?" "GOD DARN YA !" "( laughing )" "THAT WAS A GREAT ONE !" "( doorbell ringing )" "HELLO, I'M WITH THE CUBIC WASTE DEPARTMENT." "I NEED TO CHECK YOUR LORTRAN FOR INHUBITORS." "OH..." "OKAY, I GUESS." "COME ON IN, BOB." "ALRIGHT, JUST LET ME JUST USE MY TOOLS..." "HEY !" "HA HA, STUPID ASSHOLES !" "* I GOT YOUR TIMEPHONE *" "BARK, BARK !" "SCIENCE H. LOGIC, WHAT A JERK !" "( excited otter chatter )" "SILENCE, OTTTERSSS !" "IT'S THE WISE ONE !" "THE WISE ONE SPEAKS !" "THIS IS NOT THE PATH WE SHOULD BE TAKING." "WILL MORE BLOODSHED END ANYTHING ?" "WISE ONE." "OUR ANSWER TO THE GREAT QUESTION" "IS THE ONLY ONE BASED ON GOOD SCIENCE !" "SCIENCE..." "REASON..." "IS THAT REALLY ALL THERE IS ?" "THEY ARE NOT A LOGICAL RACE, WISE ONE !" "THEY GO AROUND CHOPPING DOWN TREES FOR TABLES," "WHEN THEY HAVE PERFECTLY GOOD TUMMIES TO EAT ON !" "HOW LOGICAL IS THAT ?" "YES, THE GREAT DAWKINS SAID WE CANNOT TOLERATE THOSE" "WHO DON'T USE REASON !" "HOW REASONABLE IS IT," "TO EAT OFF OF WOOD INSTEAD OF YOUR TUMMY ?" "WELL, PERHAPS THE GREAT DAWKINS WASN'T SO WISE." "OH, HE WAS INTELLIGENT." "BUT SOME OF THE MOST INTELLIGENT OTTERS I'VE EVER KNOWN" "WERE COMPLETELY LACKING IN COMMON SENSE." "MAYBE SOME OTTERS DO NEED TO BELIEVE IN SOMETHING." "WHO KNOWS MAYBE..." "JUST BELIEVING IN GOD..." "MAKES GOD EXIST." "KILL THE WISE ONE !" "KILL THE WISE ONE !" "WHAT, NO-- WAIT, WAIT !" "ARRRRGHH !" "OH, GOD... ( phone ringing )" "HELLO ?" "( Future Eric in static ) HELLO ?" "AM I THERE ?" "WHO IS THIS ?" "THERE, I HAVE ME !" "ALRIGHT, LISTEN, LISTEN TO ME CAREFULLY." "YOU NEED TO BE PATIENT." "WHAT" " WHO THE HELL IS THIS ?" "IT'S ME !" "ME WHO !" "ME, YOU !" "WHAT ?" "I'M YOU IN THE FUTURE !" "YOU HAVE TO BE PATIENT" "AND WAIT FOR THE NINTENDO Wii TO COME OUT," "OR ELSE YOU'LL WAKE UP IN THE FUTURE" "AND HAVE TO DEAL WITH A BUNCH OF SEA OTTERS !" "OH VERY FUNNY, KYLE !" "IT'S NOT KYLE, IT'S YOU !" "YEAH" " WELL YOU CAN GO F--K YOURSELF." "I'M TRYING TO DO YOU A FAVOR, DUMBASS !" "JUST LISTEN TO ME !" "LISTEN TO THIS !" "( fart )" "DICKHEAD !" "( phone ringing )" "WHAT AN ASSHOLE !" "( phone ringing )" "HELLO !" "( Future Eric again ) BUTTERS, BUTTERS !" "ERIC ?" "IS THAT YOU ?" "BUTTERS, LISTEN TO ME !" "JUST LISTEN." "I'M ABOUT TO COME OVER TO YOUR HOUSE" "AND ASK YOU TO HELP ME FREEZE MYSELF." "DO-NOT DO IT !" "ERIC, ARE YOU PLAYING A JOKE ON ME AGAIN ?" "NO, THIS IS NOT A JOKE !" "WHATEVER I SAY TO YOU BUTTERS," "NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY" "DO NOT DO WHAT I TELL YOU." "BUT..." "BUT YOU'RE HERE RIGHT NOW !" "BUTTERS COME ON WE GOTTA GO !" "NO, DON'T LISTEN TO ME, TELL ME TO GO SCREW MYSELF !" "HUH ?" "COME ON, BUTTERS, IT'S GONNA GET DARK !" "BUT, YOU'RE TELLING ME NOT TO GO WITH YOU." "WHAT ?" "WHO THE F--K IS THIS !" "AW DAMMIT-- JUST LISTEN TO ME !" "IF YOU FREEZE YOURSELF YOU ARE GOING TO DIE !" "SUCK MY BALLS !" "NO, YOU SUCK MY BALLS !" "JUST LISTEN TO ME FOR ONE MINUTE !" "OKAY, YOU HAVE ONE MINUTE." "RIGHT BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR BUTTERS HOUSE," "YOU DRANK A BUNCH OF OVALTINE" "AND PUT CLYDE FROG IN THE CLOSET" "SO NOTHING WOULD HAPPEN TO HIM, RIGHT ?" "YOU SPYING ON ME ?" "NO, I AM YOU, YOU STUPID ASSHOLE !" "F--K YOU ASSHOLE, YOU CAN GO F--K YOURSELF !" "COME ON BUTTERS, WE'RE GOING." "OH, ALRIGHT THEN..." "GOD, I HATE THAT GUY !" "MY FRIENDS, THE TIME HAS COME." "MAY SCIENCE GIVE US THE COURAGE TO DO WHAT WE MUST." "LAUNCH ALL DEFENSIVE SHIPS TO SECTOR J-7 !" "TAKE OUT THE OTTERS' CLAM FIELDS !" "SIR !" "THE UNITED ATHEIST ALLIANCE HAS SENT OUT ALL THEIR SHIPS !" "THEIR CAPITOL IS NOW UNPROTECTED !" "THEN BEGIN THE ATTACK !" "SCIENCE BE PRAISED." "KILL THE TABLE EATERS !" "IN THE NAME OF ALMIGHTY SCIENCE !" "( phone ringing )" "HELLO." "( Future Eric ) HELLO..." "KYLE..." "HELLO ?" "YES, HELLO KYLE." "IT'S ERIC, HOW'S IT GOING ?" "WHAT DO YOU WANT ?" "KYLE, YOU ARE THE SMARTEST GUY I KNOW." "SO I THINK MAYBE YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON" "WHO CAN UNDERSTAND THIS." "YOU KNOW HOW EARLIER TODAY I ASKED YOU" "TO HELP ME FREEZE MYSELF ?" "I'M NOT GOING TO HELP YOU FREEZE YOURSELF, CARTMAN." "IT'S A STUPID IDEA." "NO, SEE, I KNOW IT'S A STUPID IDEA." "BECAUSE I ACTUALLY DID FREEZE MYSELF." "AND..." "YOU WERE RIGHT, KYLE, IT BACKFIRED" "AND I WAS FROZEN FOR 500 YEARS" "AND NOW I'M CALLING YOU FROM THE FUTURE." "UH-HUH." "NO, REALLY, KYLE, I'M SERIOUSLY." "HERE, TALK TO MY ROBOT DOG." "BARK, BARK, HELLO KYLE, BARK BARK." "I'M HANGING UP NOW." "NO KYLE, LISTEN, PLEASE !" "I THINK RIGHT ABOUT NOW, I'M IN MY MOM'S FREEZER." "SUCK MY BALLS, FAT ASS." "I WILL..." "I WILL SUCK YOUR BALLS, KYLE." "JUST STOP ME FROM FREEZING MYSELF" "AND I WILL GET DOWN ON MY KNEES..." "AND I WILL SUCK YOUR BALLS." "I'LL SUCK 'EM DRY, KYLE." "( horn honking, car leaving )" "OH GOD DAMMIT !" "NOW YOU'VE MADE ME MISS MY RIDE !" "MY WHOLE DAY IS SCREWED UP BECAUSE OF YOU !" "KYLE, KYLE !" "ERIC, I REALLY THINK YOU SHOULD STOP CALLING THE PAST." "YOU COULD CHANGE THE PRESENT." "WELL, I DON'T NOTICE ANYTHING DIFFERENT KIT-9, DO YOU ?" "I GUESS NOT, MEOW-MEOW." "HMMM..." "LET'S SEE... ( explosion ) WUGH !" "MEOW-MEOW !" "WAHHH !" "MEOW-MEOW !" "WAHHH !" "MEOW-MEOW !" "T.C. WE'RE UNDER ATTACK !" "BY WHO ?" "WE HAVE TO GET TO THE WAR ROOM, IT'S THE ONLY SAFE PLACE !" "THE UNITED ATHEIST LEAGUE IS BOMBING THE CITY !" "WE'RE DEFENSELESS !" "THIS IS TERRIBLE !" "I'M GOING TO DIE IN THE FUTURE" "WITHOUT EVER PLAYING NINTENDO Wii !" "SIR, THE SEA OTTERS ARE ADVANCING" "THEY'VE BROKEN THROUGH THE EAST PORTAL !" "WHAT ?" "!" "3-WAY FUN-CHAT ON SCREEN !" "WHAT ARE YOU OTTERS DOING ?" "THIS IS OUR ATTACK !" "YES, AND WE ARE ATTACKING BOTH OF YOU !" "YOU FOOLS, THIS WILL BE THE END OF US ALL !" "THEN ACCEPT OUR ANSWER TO THE GREAT QUESTION," "AND WE WILL WITHDRAWAL !" "YOUR ANSWER TO THE GREAT QUESTION IS ILLOGICAL !" "WHAT IS THE GREAT QUESTION ?" "WHAT ATHEISTS SHOULD CALL THEMSELVES." "UNIFIED ATHEIST LEAGUE IS THE MOST LOGICAL NAME !" "UNITED ATHEIST ALLIANCE MAKES MORE SENSE !" "NO" " ALLIED ATHEIST ALLIANCE !" "THAT WAY IT HAS THREE A's !" "THAT IS THE LOGICAL CHOICE !" "SO BE IT- WE CANNOT AGREE !" "PREPARE TO DIE !" "VIRAD MISSILES LAUNCHED SIR !" "I HAVE TO GET OUT OF HERE !" "WHY IS EVERYONE IN MY PAST SO STUPID" "THAT THEY THINK I'M CRANK CALLING THEM !" "BUT ERIC, MEOW, MEOW," "YOU KNEW THE WIFE" "OF THE SMARTEST MAN IN ALL OF HISTORY." "WHO ?" "YOUR TEACHER, THE ONE CALLED GARRISON." "GARRISON ?" "BUT HE'S AN ASSHOLE !" "( phone ringing )" "OH YEAH..." "YEAH, I'M A MONKEY !" "GIVE THIS MONKEY WHAT SHE WANTS !" "OH, MISS GARRISON !" "DAMMIT, WHO THE HELL IS CALLING ?" "I'LL TELL THEM TO CALL YOU BACK." "GARRISON RESIDENCE." "CAN YOU CALL BACK LATER, PLEASE ?" "( Future Eric ) IT'S AN EMERGENCY !" "IT'S AN EMERGENCY !" "AN EMERGENCY ?" "I NEED TO SPEAK WITH MR. GARRISON RIGHT NOW." "I'M SORRY, BUT MR. GARRISON HAS PASSED AWAY." "MRS. GARRISON IS THE ONLY PERSON HERE," "AND SHE'S RATHER TIED UP AT THE MOMENT." "LOOK ASSHOLE, THIS IS A REAL EMERGENCY," "JUST PASS THE PHONE TO WHATEVER GARRISON" "WANTS TO CALL HIMSELF SINCE THE SEX CHANGE OPERATION !" "SEX CHANGE OPERATION ?" "OH-OH..." "AGHGHGH..." "YOU'RE A MAN ?" "NOT ANYMORE, I'VE BEEN FIXED !" "RICHARD, HOLD ON I CAN EXPLAIN !" "EXPLAIN ?" "HOW COULD I BE SO STUPID ?" "RICHARD, COME BACK, PLEASE !" "WELL, GO AHEAD AND LEAVE, YOU ATHEIST FAGGOT !" "HAVE A FUN TIME MOCKING GOD IN HELL !" "YOU QUEER !" "MR. GARRISON-- MR. GARRISON ?" "ALRIGHT, ERIC ARE YOU ALL SET TO GO ?" "GO..." "RIGHT..." "WHERE AM I GOING ?" "WE TOLD YOU, WE'RE SENDING YOU HOME." "WITH THE CRANK-N-WANK TIME MACHINE." "DON'T WORRY, MY SON." "WHEN YOU RETURN TO YOUR TIME," "YOU WILL MERGE WITH YOUR OTHER SELF." "IT'S ALL VERY ZEN." "WAIT..." "ISN'T EVERYBODY AT WAR OVER ATHEISM ?" "ATHEISM" " NO !" "WE'VE LEARNED TO GET RID OF ALL "ISMS" IN OUR TIME." "YES, LONG AGO WE REALIZED" ""ISMS" ARE GREAT FOR THOSE WHO ARE RATIONAL." "BUT IN THE HANDS OF IRRATIONAL PEOPLE," ""ISMS" ALWAYS LEAD TO VIOLENCE." "SO THERE IS NO WAR NOW IN THE FUTURE ?" "OF COURSE THERE'S WAR !" "THE STUPID FRENCH-CHINESE THINK THEY HAVE A RIGHT TO HAWAII !" "YEAH !" "YEAH !" "BUT NOW THE MOMENT HAS COME TO SEND YOU BACK TO YOUR TIME" "WE UNFROZE YOU FOR A PURPOSE," "AND NOW THAT PURPOSE IS FULFILLED." "AND WHAT WAS THAT PURPOSE AGAIN ?" "WE EXPLAINED THAT TO YOU ALREADY." "RIGHT." "GOOD BYE ERIC, I WILL MISS YOU !" "SQUAWK, SQUAK !" "I'LL MISS YOU TOO, KOK-A-3." "SO LONG ERIC," "AND TELL EVERYONE IN THE PAST FOR US..." "THAT NO ONE SINGLE ANSWER, IS EVER THE ANSWER." "HEYYYY !" "I'M BACK..." "WOW, I'M BACK !" "THERE YOU ARE, ERIC !" "MOM, MOM, THEY DID IT !" "ERIC, YOU HAVE TO COME HOME." "YOU CAN'T JUST WAIT HERE FOR THAT GAME TO COME OUT." "NO, I KNOW, YOU'RE RIGHT, MOM." "I NEED TO LEARN TO BE PATIENT..." "I THINK I CAN WAIT THREE WEEKS FOR NINTENDO Wii TO COME OUT." "BUT HONEY, IT'S ONLY SEPTEMBER..." "THAT NINTENDO Wii DOESN'T COME OUT FOR TWO MONTHS." "WHAT ?" "NO..." "NO !" "YOU SENT ME BACK TOO FAR !" "AY, DO IT OVER !" "WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO, MUFFIN ?" "I CAN'T WAIT TWO MONTHS !" "I CAN'T !" "THERE HAS TO BE A WAY AROUND THIS !" "HEY KID, SOMEBODY'S ON THE PHONE FOR YOU." "HELLO ?" "( Future Eric ) HELLO ?" "HELLO !" "I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING." "DO NOT DO IT !" "YOU JUST NEED TO BE PATIENT, AND WAIT THE TWO MONTHS !" "DO YOU HEAR ME ?" "OH, SUCK MY BALLS, KYLE." "ME WHO !" "ME, YOU !" "WHAT ?" "I'M YOU IN THE FUTURE !" "YOU HAVE TO BE PATIENT" "AND WAIT FOR THE NINTENDO Wii TO COME OUT," "OR ELSE YOU'LL WAKE UP IN THE FUTURE" "AND HAVE TO DEAL WITH A BUNCH OF SEA OTTERS !" "OH VERY FUNNY, KYLE !" "IT'S NOT KYLE, IT'S YOU !" "YEAH" " WELL YOU CAN GO F--K YOURSELF."