"Find everything okay?" "I did." "Thank you." "You have a beautiful accent." "Let me guess, Madagascar?" "Nigeria." "Whoa, you're giving me too much here." "Okay, um, this is a dime." "This is ten cents." "This is a ten?" "Mmm-hmm." "And this is five." "But it is bigger." "I will never understand." "It's no problem." "So do you live around here?" "No, I am visiting for one week." "Then I'm going home to my husband." "Well, "married" is an interesting word." "It means different things to different people." "To me, it means everything." "I was afraid you'd say that." "Well, tell your husband that he is a lucky man." "Actually, I'm the lucky one." "Good night." "It's a jungle out there" "Disorder and confusion everywhere" "No one seems to care" "Well, I do" "Hey, who's in charge here?" "It's a jungle out there" "Poison in the very air we breathe" "You know what's in the water that you drink?" "Well, I do" "It's amazing" "People think I'm crazy 'cause I worry all the time" "If you paid attention, you'd be worried, too" "You better pay attention" "Or this world we love so much might just kill you" "I could be wrong now" "But I don't think so" "'Cause there's a jungle out there" "It's a jungle out there" "Wait, wait, wait." "I'm not finished." "Okay?" "Almost." "You done?" "Hold on, Mr. Monk." "I'm sorry I don't read as fast as you." "Nobody does." "Okay." "Hold on." "Natalie, why don't you buy your own copy?" "There's a newsstand right down the street." "Actually, Mr. Monk, that is my copy." "Okay, fine, take it." "Take it, read it." "You can finish it when I'm done." "Yeah, it'll be old news by then." "We'll have a new president." "What?" "What?" "You smell that?" "Is that you?" "Is what me?" "Are you cooking bacon?" "Does it look like I'm cooking bacon?" "It's coming from outside." "I knew it." "It's a hippie." "It's incense." "He's burning incense down there." "By the way, that's a perfect name for that stuff" "Because that's how people react to it." "They get incensed." "Get it?" "Incense, incensed." "You add the "D." Forget it." "Hey!" "You can't sell that stuff without a permit." "I am not selling anything." "Of course you're not." "Nobody wants to buy that junk." "Find another street." "Bye." "Peace and love, and Woodstock." "Woodstock?" "You heard me!" "How can you not smell that?" "Maybe we should call the cops." "We don't have to." "That was the cops." "We have a job." "Thank God." "Finally be able to breathe." "I can't breathe." "Open a window." "It is open." "Why don't we light some incense?" "Dr. Z says she's been dead 12 days, give or take." "Her name was Maria Fuentes, 37 years old." "She was the housekeeper." "Those are the owners out there," "John and Carolyn Buxton." "They just got back from Barbados." "Maria stayed behind." "She was supposed to lock up the house." "Excuse me, Lieutenant." "Randy." "Do you want some liniment cream?" "It'll kill the smell." "Nope, I'm fine." "It's not my first crime scene." "They got home this morning at about 8:30, came in from the garage, he saw his cell phone." "Yeah, Buxton left his cell phone." "I guess he was on vacation." "So when they came in from the garage, that's when the smell hit them." "Are you trying to impress that girl?" "What girl?" "The CSI tech." "You think that's a quality she's looking for in a man?" "Do you think she's saying," ""Why can't I meet an attractive," ""thirtysomething non-smoker" ""who's oblivious to the stench of rotting flesh?"" "I honestly have no idea what you're talking about." "Anyway, he came in, and he practically tripped over the body." "Is there anything missing from the house?" "No, they're saying no." "It might have been personal." "She had a boyfriend, or an ex-boyfriend." "He did two months for assault last year." "She was only hit twice." "Ah, so not a crime of passion." "What do you got?" "It's an earring." "One earring." "She took it off." "Hmm." "And this is a first aid handbook." "Did someone try to treat her?" "I asked the owners." "That book normally lives on the shelf down below." "It was open like that when they found her." "Maybe the killer felt bad, like remorse, and tried to help her." "There's blood on the book, but the countertop underneath is clean." "What does that mean?" "It means it was already there." "It was already like that when she was killed." "So the killer opened the book to the page about head trauma before he hit her over the head?" "So it would appear." "That's very unusual." "Are you sure you're okay?" "You're turning green." "Oh, I'm just hungry." "Green with hunger." "You're green with hunger?" "Yeah, it's a..." "You never heard that before?" "No, I never have." "Oh, it's a very common expression." "I've got to..." "I've got to go." "Somebody called maybe." "Just checking on some evidence." "Sergeant." "For the love of crackers." "I should have known." "Do you mind?" "It's 7:45." "People are trying to sleep." "They are?" "Yes, they are." "So cut out the jam session." "This is not the Fillmore West, and you are not Louis Armstrong." "Okay?" "Look, here's $5." "All right?" "Go to the park and buy yourself a drink." "I'm sorry, but I cannot leave." "Sure you can." "I'll help you." "You do not understand." "I cannot leave this corner." "Why not?" "My wife was killed here." "Your wife?" "Two weeks ago, on this corner." "This is sacred ground." "Here we are." "Please, make yourself comfortable." "I have some juice." "I'm very happy for you." "No, no, no, no." "I'm offering you some juice." "Would you like some juice?" "Oh, I'm sorry." "Thank you." "I don't know your name." "Monk." "Adrian." "What does it mean?" "It means nobody picks you for their softball team in seventh grade." "I am Samuel Waingaya." "Tell me about her." "Here, sit down." "Her name was Ansara." "It means "sunflower. "" "That is what she was." "She was a school teacher." "This is why she was here, a teaching conference, two weeks in San Francisco." "She was so excited." "What happened?" "I don't know exactly, but she was at the grocery store down the street buying food, Mmm." "And a vehicle, I think a van, drove through a red light." "It kept going." "Ah, a hit-and-run." "I remember reading about that." "I was out of town when it happened." "But it was in all the newspapers when I got back." "How do they know it was a van?" "They don't, but I do." "I saw the tire tracks on the street." "They were still there when I got here." "I know something about cars." "I'm a mechanic back home." "They were in the road." "They are from a headlamp." "Have you been to the police?" "Yes." "They are doing all they can." "That is what they say." "And you made these?" ""Reward for information." "12,000 naira. "" "That's very generous." "Not really." "It is $85." "I am not a rich man like you." "Yes." "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa." "What, what, what, what, what is this?" "What are you doing?" "Oh, I'm so sorry." "It's so rude of me." "Please, would you like one?" "No, no, no, thank you." "But do you..." "Do you have to..." "It calms my nerves." "You did say for me to make myself at home." "Did I misunderstand?" "No, no." "Okay, wait a minute." "Hold on." "Here." "Breathe it into this." "Okay?" "See?" "There you go." "And there you are." "I love it." "It's ingenious." "What do you call it?" "A smoking bag." "I've never heard of such a thing." "Is it new?" "Yes, it's brand-new." "This would be very popular in Nigeria." "Right, right." "Here you go." "I am sorry to wake you, Adrian Monk." "It will not happen again." "Thank you for the juice." "Yeah, Samuel, don't go." "Um, I'm..." "I'm a police detective." "I'm..." "I'm very good at it." "I'm sure you are." "Here's the thing." "I want to help you." "I..." "I'm going to help you." "We're gonna find the man who killed your wife." "You want to help me?" "But I don't understand." "Wow." "It's just like in the movies." "You've never been here?" "You said you spoke to the police." "Downstairs, just for 10 minutes only." "They said that they would call me." "Two weeks." "No calls." "No hope." "Until now." "Do you drink coffee?" "I love coffee." "Then you're gonna hate this." "What?" "What you said about the coffee." "It was very funny." "Am I that funny?" "No." "Hey, here it is." "Technically, you shouldn't be seeing this." "This is from a gas station surveillance camera." "It's about a minute after the accident, half a mile east." "Excuse me, Captain Stottlemeyer." "It was not an accident." "When he hit her, that was an accident." "Driving away and leaving her there, that was murder." "I appreciate that, Mr. Waingaya." "That's why we're here." "Oh, here it is." "8:17:02." "There." "We think that's the guy." "He's moving pretty quick, and he's missing a headlamp." "You were right." "It's a van." "What does that mean?" "You do not want to know." "Adrian Monk knows." "What about the headlight?" "Can we trace it?" "We've got Sergeant Kramer's report right here." "He already tried." "Every garage within ten miles." "Nothing turned up." "Uh, Mr. Waingaya, the case is open." "Sergeant Kramer's a good guy." "He's gonna do his best." "But cases like this are very, very hard to solve." "Do you understand?" "You can't expect miracles." "Ansara used to say, "Miracles happen every day." ""You just have to know where to look. "" "Excuse me, there's no smoking in the building." "It's okay, Lieutenant Disher, I know the routine." "I brought my smoking bag." "Your smoking bag?" "He's trying to quit." "He's down to two bags a day." "Did you hear that?" "She said "two bags" instead of "two packs. "" "Thank you so much, Natalie Teeger, for teaching me how to laugh again." "You know, there's a smoking section down at the end of the hall." "Natalie, Randy, why don't you take Mr. Waingaya and his bag..." "We don't have a smoking area." "Just go to the conference room and open a window." "Yes, sir." "Uh, Mr. Waingaya, if you'll follow me." "Yes." "Two bags, it's very funny." "Where is "picture go regular"?" "What are you doing?" "Well, I might have missed something." "No, no, no, I'm talking about your friend Samuel." "What are you doing getting his hopes up like that?" "You and I both know the odds against solving a two-week-old hit-and-run with virtually no evidence." "Monk, it's 1,000 to 1, probably worse." "Now this case," "Maria Fuentes, the murdered housekeeper." "This case, this case is fresh." "It's piping hot." "It's solvable if we act fast." "Now, Randy and I are going back to the house." "We're gonna walk the property, talk to the neighbors." "I can't help you." "I'm sorry." "I'm working with Samuel." "You're working with Samuel?" "He lost his wife, Leland." "They ran Trudy over and just kept on driving." "You mean Ansara." "Trudy was your wife." "Wait a second." "Picture, go back." "Make picture go back." "All right, all right." "There you go." "Picture go regular." "Is that the same van?" "He turned around." "The surveillance camera is there." "He was driving west." "He was getting away." "Then he turned around." "Why would he turn around?" "Guilt." "No, he did not come back to help my wife, or call a doctor." "There was no guilt." "Excuse me." "How are you guys doing?" "We're living the dream, man." "Great." "Are you guys here a lot drinking beer, hanging out?" "Slacking, you know, off?" "Slacking off?" "Are you a cop?" "Not technically." "It's a long story." "Hey, we got time." "And we love stories." "All right." "Well, I was suffering from what the doctors called a psychotic break..." "Mr. Monk, they don't care." "No." "Okay, there was a hit-and-run two weeks ago on Pine Street." "Did you hear anything about it?" "It was on the 17th, a Tuesday night." "Please try to remember." "Were you guys here that night around 8:15?" "Probably." "Do you remember seeing a van with a broken headlight?" "He was going that way." "He must have been doing about 80." "Wait, yeah, yeah." "Dude, they won't let us use the bathroom here, right?" "So I had to cross the street and use the one at that diner." "And some dude in a van almost hit me." "Do you remember this?" "There's a bathroom in that diner?" "I will never forget it, even if I live to be, like, as old as you, man." "Thirty seconds later, same guy, same van, flips a U-ey, almost hits me again." "Did you see his face?" "Did you see the driver?" "Nah, he was, like, hunched over, like he was on his cell phone or something." "Cell phone." "He was headed into the tunnel." "That's why he turned around." "He didn't want the call to be interrupted." "What about the van?" "What color was it?" "I have no idea." "Well, do you remember anything else?" "I have a dentist appointment tomorrow." "About the van." "You know what, I think it was, like, an exterminator van or something." "Exterminator." "Yeah, because I looked up and it had these big letters on it." "It said "poison. "" "Poison." "Yeah, I remember looking right at it and saying," ""Poison?"" "Okay, this is how we do our laundry in America." "These are your whites." "My whites, excellent." "Your off-whites." "Your off-off-whites." "These are the primary colors red, yellow, green, blue, and that's indigo." "Left socks, right socks." "I've labeled them for you." "But in Nigeria, we just wash all of our socks together." "Well, I don't like to judge people, but that's wrong." "So you mean you separate everything?" "But how much is that going to cost?" "$200." "But I've been watching the Friends on TV for years." "This is not how they do it." "What friends?" "You know, the TV show Friends." "Lisa Kudrow?" "Jennifer Aniston?" "Yeah, oh, we don't get the African TV here." "I've been looking at trucks in the street." "None of them say "poison. "" "Yeah, I know." "It doesn't make sense." "Exterminator vans usually say "pest control,"" "or something like that." "I can't figure it out, but I will." "I know you will." "Excuse me, are you using all the machines?" "That's right." "But they're empty." "That is the pre-wash cleansing cycle." "The pre-wash what?" "The cleansing cycle." "If you are going to live here, you should learn some of the customs." "Did you see that, with the finger?" "What does that mean?" "That means we're number one." "And we should hurry." "Adrian Monk, he's not an exterminator." "He's not?" "He works at a restaurant." "A French restaurant." "The boy made a mistake." "The truck did not say "poison. "" "It said "poisson. "" "Poisson." "Fish." "Very good." "Good work, Samuel." "We are gonna get this man, and he is going to pay for what he did to us." "To us?" "I mean to you." "What he did to you." "Adrian Monk, this is the van." "We can't just say that." "We have to be sure." "I am sure." "Look at this light." "It doesn't look new." "Exactly." "He is diabolical." "He has replaced the broken headlight with an old headlight, not a new one." "It's been repainted, see?" "Maybe." "Maybe." "What is it?" "Rice." "Ansara was buying food the night she died." "She bought rice." "I saw the sales receipt." "We have to bring this to the police." "What?" "Uh, yeah." "I need a bag." "This is the third bowl you chipped this week." "I don't want to hear your excuses." "I've been warning you for a month." "Mr. Nichols, please, I'll pay for the bowl." "You can take it out of my pay." "Just tell me what it's worth." "It's worth a hell of a lot more than you." "Adiós." "You're fired." "You can pick up your check on Friday." "Hey, hey, hey, hey." "The apron." "What does that mean?" "He is the guy." "Good morning." "Beautiful." "That's where she was killed." "Uh-huh." "But there's no marker." "It seems like there should be a plaque or something." "Monk..." "She is not Trudy." "I spoke to Natalie." "She's worried about you." "Yeah, well, I'm worried about Natalie." "Shut up." "Let me talk." "You and I both know what's going on here." "You're frustrated." "It's been 12 years since Trudy." "You're getting your wires crossed." "We haven't been able to solve her murder, so you're fixating on this case, on this woman." "I'm not fixating." "There's got to be six dozen flowers here." "Natalie says you've missed two appointments with Dr. Bell, and you're not eating." "I'm not hungry." "She also said that you and your friend Samuel have a suspect." "Kenneth Nichols." "And you're planning to go undercover in his restaurant to get closer to him?" "He's the guy." "Okay, um..." "You don't happen to have any, oh, I don't know, say, evidence?" "He has a record, drunk driving." "And we found some rice on the van." "Some rice?" "Well, doesn't he own a restaurant?" "Yes." "Well, it's not exactly a smoking gun, is it?" "I mean, there's rice all over this town." "It's the San Francisco treat." "All right," "I'll check the guy out." "I'm on it." "I promise." "But you, you need to step back, buddy." "Okay, I was there 12 years ago." "It ate you up." "You were crippled." "You could not leave your room." "I won't allow that to happen again." "So promise me that you'll think hard, long and hard, before you do anything stupid." "I promise." "Good." "Have a good day." "Looks good." "What is that?" "Is that a speck?" "We better make sure." "I need a plate." "Where are the plates?" "What have you been doing?" "Well, we did this fork and this knife." "We've been washing them American style." "What the hell does that mean?" "What about the potatoes?" "Oh, yeah." "What did you do?" "You were just supposed to peel them." "They look like dice." "American style." "Why do you keep saying that?" "That doesn't make any sense." "Is there a problem here?" "No, sir." "These are the new dishwashers." "Monsieur Adrian and monsieur Samuel." "I was just showing them the ropes." "Well, they can't be any worse than the two clowns we just fired." "Well, I stand corrected." "That's coming out of your pay." "Listen, I just did a fish run." "When they're done here," "I want you to have them unload the van." "Will do." "I'll be at the bar if you need me." "Please don't need me." "You heard the man." "Get back to work!" "Adrian Monk." "Adrian Monk." "Tuesday the 17th, the farmers' market." "Oh, Kenneth picks up fish and produce every week, if he's sober enough." "And where is the farmers' market?" "Uh, Vinton Street, near the wharf." "How far is that from where..." "It's close, maybe five blocks." "Then the puzzle is complete." "He was driving back from the farmers' market." "He's obviously an alcoholic." "He had been drinking, and he ran a red light." "Maybe, maybe." "No, not maybe." "Yes, this is what happened." "There's no proof." "Samuel, we need evidence." "When we prove it, if we prove it, and you want to... do something to him," "I'll help you." "Why would you do this for me?" "You didn't even know her." "Of course I knew her." "We were married for seven years." "What are they doing here?" "Who?" "John and Carolyn Buxton." "I was just at their house." "Their maid was killed two weeks ago." "Adrian Monk, what is going on?" "I don't know." "She was on the phone." "Who was on the phone?" "The maid." "The woman who was killed." "That's why she removed her earring." "Hello, my name is Adrian." "I'll be your server." "I have your soup." "Uh, we haven't ordered yet." "I just assumed you wanted soup." "Was I right?" "And for the lady, tiramisu." "Dessert?" "Why wait until the last minute?" "I understand you're friends of my employer, Mr. Nichols." "Yes, we've known Kenneth for years." "Why?" "Have we met?" "No, no." "I'm new here." "I'm sorry to hear about your housekeeper." "Someone mentioned that she was killed recently." "She was bludgeoned to death." "Is that right?" "More coffee?" "Hey, wait a minute, I do know you." "He was there." "He's with the police." "Are you a detective?" "Actually, um, I'm moonlighting." "As a waiter?" "Well, uh..." "You know our motto," ""To protect and serve. "" "When I'm a cop, I protect." "At night, I serve." "But it's day." "Exactly." "I..." "I've been thinking about your case." "The morning you returned from your trip, you said you found your cell phone." "That's right." "I forgot to take it with me to Barbados." "It's no big deal." "But when you got home..." "It was lying on the kitchen counter." "What's this all about?" "I'm just tying up loose ends." "How is that tiramisu?" "It's good." "Delicious." "Great." "I'll tell the chef." "Oh, yes, one more thing." "Does Kenneth Nichols have your cell phone number?" "Kenneth?" "Of course he does." "We talk all the time." "Especially during baseball season." "They talk after every game." "May we see the wine list?" "No." "Definitely..." "And we can prove it?" "We can't prove he killed Ansara." "But he committed another murder, a maid, a housekeeper, the same night." "Where's the phone?" "This way." "Who are you calling?" "Captain Stottlemeyer." "We need a copy of Nichols' phone bill." "That's the smoking gun." "Actually, this is the smoking gun." "Outside, the both of you." "I think it's time for your break." "The smell!" "I can't breathe!" "I can't get a break." "First the incense, then the dead housekeeper, and now this." "Oh, God, it stinks!" "It's like chemical warfare." "Adrian Monk, will you please stop talking about the smell?" "Sometimes you are like a big, crying infant." "We have other problems, Adrian Monk." "That's better." "Can I say something?" "Is it about the stink?" "No." "Yes!" "I can't breathe!" "No..." "You just think of something else." "You said that another woman was killed." "What did you mean?" "It stinks in here!" "Adrian Monk, just keep talking." "Here's what happened." "Kenneth Nichols was driving that night." "He was in this van." "He called his friend John Buxton, but Buxton wasn't there." "He was in Barbados on vacation." "The housekeeper, Maria Fuentes, answered his cell phone." "They talked for a minute." "While they were talking..." "Ansara." "Trudy." "Trudy." "Adrian Monk, what happened next?" "He hit her, and kept driving." "Oh, my God, I just hit somebody." "Maria overheard everything." "At that point..." "She knew too much." "He had to keep her quiet." "So he kept her on the phone." "He kept her talking while he drove across town." "I just pulled over, and she's hurt pretty bad." "But someone's called 911, and an ambulance is on the way." "Okay." "Hold on." "I have a book here." "Okay, it says to keep her warm and keep her head still." "Ansara." "She was a flower." "She was so young." "She was just beginning." "We are turning." "What is happening now?" "Now he kills us." "Fine with me." "We must go on." "Trudy, Ansara, they would want us to go on." "They would want us to be strong." "They are here with us now." "Do you not feel it?" "Not anymore." "Well, I am not going to give up." "And neither are you." "Samuel..." "This is your final lesson." "This is how we do things in America." "We cry a lot." "We confuse our dead wife with other people's dead wives." "And then we give up." "We're stopping." "That can't be good." "We've got to get these ropes off." "God." "I have an idea." "I have an idea." "Can you reach into my pants?" "Yes." "My cigarette lighter." "Ah." "I got it." "I got it." "Okay." "I got it." "Okay." "Okay." "What's that smell?" "My flesh, it's burning." "It stinks." "Sorry." "Look at her!" "Look at her!" "You son of a bitch." "Her name was Ansara." "Say her name." "Say it!" "Say it!" "Ansara." "Ansara." "And that's Trudy." "Say her name." "I didn't know her." "Say her name!" "I never met her." "Say her name." "All right." "Trudy." "Trudy." "Here." "Oh, what are these?" "A goodbye present." "It's comedy CDs." "It's Richard Pryor, Monty Python," "Bill Cosby." "If you think I'm funny, these guys are gonna rock your world." "Thank you." "But I know these guys, and they are not as funny as Natalie Teeger." ""Two bags a day. "" "How do you do it?" "I don't know." "I'm just funny." "I am." "I guess this is goodbye." "There is no such thing." "We will meet again, Adrian Monk." "Someday you will come to Africa to visit." "Maybe." "No maybe." "I'm saying yes." "Or you will come back here." "Either one, we'll see." "We'll see." "Nobody knows." "What's it like?" "What is what like?" "Knowing." "Knowing is everything." "But your turn will come, Adrian Monk." "You are next." "Do not give up." "Never." "This is for you." "Thank you." "No man has a greater friend than Adrian Monk." "No man has a greater friend than Samuel Waingaya."