"(Addison) There are basically five steps to the IVF process." "One, they stimulate and monitor the development of healthy eggs in the ovaries." "Uh, two, they harvest the eggs." "Three, they select and secure sperm." "Four, they, uh, combine the egg and the sperm in a lab and provide an appropriate environment for fertilization and early embryo growth." "And five, they select" "Identify the best embryos and transfer them to the uterus." "I'm at step one." "(Chuckles)" "And how are you feeling about that?" "I feel..." "Like... (Chuckles)" "Like I'm at step one." "I got hormones." "Congratulations." "You pulled the trigger." "It's not quite congratulations yet because I haven't pulled the trigger, uh, because the shots go in my ass." "Sam can't pull the trigger?" "I like to be sexy with Sam, and shots that stimulate egg production-- not sexy." "Enough said." "(Clicks tongue)" "Okay." "And this stays between us, right?" "I have no idea what you're talking about." "(Clears throat)" "God, I miss Naomi." "(Inhales and exhales deeply)" "What are you" "What are you doing?" "Just calm down." "Massaging the area helps to absorb the hormones." "I'm..." "Deriving absolutely no pleasure from this whatsoever." "(Sighs)" "Well... (Clears throat) Thank you." "Now it's congratulations." "Well, my FSH is really high." "I mean, I don't know if I'll get any..." "Good eggs out of it." "It's still congratulations, because there's no way to know unless you try, and you're trying." "(Closes zipper)" "(Chuckles)" "(Man) It's not safe." "(Woman speaks indistinctly)" "No one should go up there." "Oh, Wes, Wes, no one is gonna do anything to you, honey." "Remember, you wanted to give them your painting." "I'm not going up there." "I don't want to be here, mom." " It's not safe." " Honey" " Karen..." " No one should get in there." " Wes, what's going on?" " Dr. Bennett." " Everything okay?" " He's refusing to take his heart meds." "He's refusing to take any meds." "Okay." "Hey, hey, Wes." "Is this your painting here?" "(Mutters) It's really beautiful." "Is that this building?" "Wes?" "The elevators hear." "They hear you." "Right." "They want you to go in." "They-- they want to trap you." "You know who would love to see this painting..." "I'm not going up there." "Wes?" "Dr. Turner." "Dr. Turner, Wes." "(Mutters) Why don't we both take the stairs..." " They hear you and..." " Up to my office?" "They watch you." "He needs to start seeing her again." "(Speaks indistinctly) Ever since he stopped, he's in trouble." "Everything's gonna be okay." "Why don't you come with me, w" " Okay, all right." "I can't go up there." "I can't be in here." "I can't." "I can't." " Take that." " I can't." "(Indistinct conversations)" "(Door opens)" "(Inhales sharply)" "(Laughs)" "(Laughs) Ahh." "I can't believe you have been running around Italy for six months." "I'm jealous." "Don't be jealous." "Just go." "And get the pizza in Naples." "It is insane." "And then head straight to Rome, buy a large box of condoms, and never leave." "(Laughs)" "Italian men are ridiculous." "And they're everywhere." "Italian men in Italy." "Just standing around in Armani suits, eating gelato." "Waiting to get attacked by predatory American tourists?" "I'm never a tourist there." "I am che donna stupenda..." "A hot piece of ass." "(Laughs)" "(Laughs)" "(Indistinct conversations continue)" "When did your symptoms start?" "Couple months a-ago in Ravello." "Okay, we can try meds." "I mean, there are ways that we can manage your symptoms." "Amelia, thanks to you," "I had a beautiful six months in Italy, which..." "I wouldn't have had, and I am grateful-- so grateful." "But I'm not gonna..." "Die a slow death from Huntington's." "I am not going the way my mother did." " I'm not." " Michelle" " You promised." " I know, but y" "It's time, Amelia." "I mean, I've had great food, great sex, great love in my life, and a great friend." "I'm happy." "And I'm ready." "I need you to help me die." "(Knock on door)" "(Mouth full) All right." "You want to open it?" "All right." "Open it up." " Hi." " Hey." " Hey, uncle Sam." " Hey, buddy." "How you doin'?" "Hey, have you ever, um, baked anything, like, tried to bake?" "'Cause it's hard." "(Lucas speaking indistinctly)" "(Normal voice) Really hard." "I had no idea how hard it was." " It's harder than med school." " Yeah." "I got my little, uh, 2-year-old sous chef here." "Um... (Imitates motor whirring) Yay." " I want tv." " I, uh" "Yes." "You?" "Why are you here?" "It's Wes." "Do you remember him?" " Patient." "He was a painter." " Yeah, I know Wes." "He's off his meds." "Psych meds or heart meds?" "All of 'em." "He won't see Sheldon." "He won't listen to me." "You're the only one he trusts." "I know that you can't talk to him officially," " but..." " Damn it." "Unofficially, I was thinking maybe" " Yeah." "I'll get a sitter." " All right." " Can you watch him for a minute?" " Yeah." "What's happening, buddy boy?" "If you and Mason are gonna be seeing each other," "I thought maybe we should set some ground rules." "Ground rules?" "Okay." "Yeah." "Mm." "Thanks." "(People speaking indistinctly)" "First, your wife..." "Yeah." "Is not allowed to speak to Mason or be anywhere near him." "Charlotte should never have done what she did, but she-- she's sorry." "Uh, and she's actually very different once you get to know her." "No, thanks." "Secondly, I don't want you telling Mason that you're his father." "Ever?" "For now." "Okay?" "If you want to see Mason, those are my conditions." "Beautiful." "All of this is so beautiful." "The colors, the textures..." "Everything around us, it's-- it's life on a canvas." "Hey, Wes." "It's me." "It's Dr. Turner." "Do you remember me?" "(Chuckles)" "You're not Dr. Turner." "Yes." "Yes, I am." "Listen to me, Wes." "Do you remember when we started working together and you were living in a box on Venice Beach?" "Do you remember that?" "And I used to come visit you, and we would talk about how you were feeling, about the voices in your head, the-- the ones that frightened you?" "You're not Dr. Turner." "Do you remember what happened after that?" "You started taking medication and you kept coming to see me and you got better." "And you didn't live in a box anymore." "You had an apartment." "You paid rent." "The apartment on 3rd street?" "Yes. (Chuckles) The apartment on 3rd street." "And-- and you had a show in a local art gallery." "People loved my paintings." "They did." "You made..." "Beautiful paintings." "Don't you want to get back to that?" "You..." "Are not..." "Dr. Turner." "Wes." "The machines got Dr. Turner." "The machines took over her mind." " They made her leave me." " Wes..." "The real Dr. Turner would never have left me." "You're a machine." "And I'm" " I'm not talking to you anymore." "Michelle is 30." "Her CAG count is 43." "She should've had a couple more years before her symptoms started." "How advanced are they?" "Tremors, rigidity, seizures." "The younger the onset, the faster they progress." "Yeah, it's a daunting prospect, but there are support groups and therapy." "And she'll have time where she's lucid and functional." "But she doesn't want the time, does she?" "She wants me to euthanize her." "Your friend Michelle, is she a puppy?" "Because unless she's a puppy" "I promised her I would." "It was the only way" "I could stop her from killing herself when she found out she had the Huntington's gene." "Wait, Amelia" "You know, the puppy thing is kind of a good point." "Why are we more humane in our treatment of animals" " You're not actually considering this" " He did it." "Okay, okay, okay." "One..." "When I tell you something, just keep it to yourself." "Okay?" "And two, my patient was in his 70's, he was in excruciating pain, and he only had a couple of weeks to live." "What if you were seizing and drooling and losing control of your muscles, of your bowels, of your mind" "Would you want to stick around for that?" "You took an oath." "And you think I would do less harm by letting her die slowly and painfully?" "I know you're sad, I know you're scared," "I know you want to help your friend." "This is not how to do it." "Physician-assisted suicide is legal in Washington and in Oregon" "But in California, we're talking about murder." "You get that, right?" "You're talking about committing a murder." "(Clicking)" "I-I got one." "What do I do?" " What?" "What?" "Wait." " Reel it in." "Reel it in." "(Indistinct conversations)" "There you go." "Nice and steady." "Oh, my God." "Mason, you really got one." "Nice and steady." "Nice and steady." " Yeah. (Laughs)" " There you go." "Bring it up." "Bring it up." "Yes!" "Oh, look at that." "(Laughs)" "Yeah." "(Laughs)" "Ew-la-la-la." "Good job, man." "Check that out." "Look at that, man." "Wow." "I'm hungry." "You want a hot dog?" " Sure." " Hot dog?" "No, thanks." "(Laughs)" "You're pretty good." "You want to go again?" "Uh... (Indistinct conversations continue)" "Are you dating my mom?" "No." "We're just friends." "Well, whenever my mom has a friend that's a guy, it usually means that he's her boyfriend." "And her boyfriends are kinda dumb." "Oh, well, it's a good thing..." "I'm not her boyfriend, then, huh?" "I mean, do you think a dumb boyfriend could do..." "Like this?" "(Indistinct conversations continue)" "Um, if it's all right," "I kinda want to go find my mom." "(Laughs) Okay." "Go ahead." "(Indistinct conversations continue)" "Hey." "Hey." "So did you hear about my patient, my former patient, my schizophrenic patient Wes, who, because I was suspended and forced to stop seeing him, has stopped taking his meds?" "And is living on the streets talking to traffic lights." "I heard." "It's not okay." "It's not okay." " Okay." " I'm thinking about suing." "(Mouth full) You're gonna sue a homeless guy?" "The medical board." "A-and-- and if I can't sue, then I am gonna go to the press and I am gonna bring attention to this system, to this process that is so broken," "I don't even know where to start fixing it!" "(Voice breaking) Okay, are you angry at me?" "'Cause you're actually yelling at me." "No." "Oh, no, Addison." "I just..." "Ever since Pete's heart attack," "I feel like I've been trying to be the perfect wife and mother and not a doctor." "I haven't let myself realize the effect that my suspension has had on my patients, whom I just... abandoned." "(Mouth full) You didn't completely abandon them." "No, I did." "I did." "That's how it feels to them." "And it sucks." "Nai used to put..." "Food on top of feelings." "Addison, I'm a therapist." "I don't eat for comfort." "That's not healthy." "It's disordered eating." "Try a doughnut hole." "They help." "They're good, right?" "Hey." "Uh, I got an idea about Wes." "You got a moment?" "Yeah." "I got nothin' but." "How are you doing?" "You good?" "I'm great." "I have doughnut holes." "Oh." "You-- you want to lock my son up?" "Not exactly." "We just want to keep him in a psych hold." "Because of Wes' pattern of destructive behavior, severe delusions, which result in him not taking his heart medication." "He could die." "We think we could get a judge to sign off on the hold." "I've had him committed before, Dr. Turner." "It makes it worse." "Being held down and being straightjacketed, his paranoia goes off the charts." "And then when he goes off his meds, which he always eventually does, he trusts me less." "I need him to trust me." "I'm his mom." "I mean, the only way I can be there for him at all is if he trusts me." "I... (Voice breaking) I can't have him committed." "I-I mean, he" "He's still my boy." "He's in there." "He's somewhere in there, you know, in the cracks." "In the moments where those voices get quiet, he's my wonderful, wonderful boy." "I-I won't allow you to-- to hold Wes..." "Against his will." "And if you pursue this," "I will fight you." "How did you do it?" "Morphine." "My patient was halfway there on a cocktail of sedatives and sleeping pills so it didn't take much." "And what happened..." "After you gave him the drugs?" "Well, at first, he was ecstatic." "Maybe... because he was free from the pain." "But after his body started to shut down..." "Well, there was so much..." "Fear." "He said it was what he wanted, but I don't think he was prepared for the..." "How terrifying and-- and lonely and it was." "And what did you do?" "I stayed with him till it was over." "It takes an emotional toll on you." "Sometimes I wonder if I gave him the morphine because I was the one who couldn't take it anymore, that if I had been stronger for him, maybe he would've died in his sleep without any of that..." "Regret or..." "Despair." "If you knew then how you would feel now..." "Would it have stopped you?" "No, but that was different." "And no matter what Michelle says, she has no idea what it's really like to face death." "Believe me..." "It's not gentle or sweet or a relief." "I gave her my word." "Then take it back." "Take back your word before you ruin your life and your career." "Take it back." "So have you seen Amelia?" "I don't have her on GPS." "I'm just worried." "So am I." "You don't think that she would actu" "I don't know." "I don't..." "I'm sick." "I'm actually worried a little sick." "I mean, physically nauseous." "But I'm not her shrink." "I'm not her father." "That's the way you feel about her, fatherly?" "'Cause you two have been spending a lot of time together." "I don't know." "I don't know what I'm feeling except sick." " Hey." " Hey." "How was fishing with the kid?" "It was good." "He had never been before." "He did great." "He caught two fish..." "Which he couldn't care less about." "No, it wasn't good." "It was awkward." "It was weird and awkward and it was like he didn't want to have anything to do with me, and I just don't get it." "(Pete) Hi." " Hey." " Hey." "Hey." "Mm." "What now?" "Mason and I were getting along great until..." "Until what?" "If you're having an issue with him, it has nothing to do with me." "I only talked to the mother." "We hung out today, and it was awkward." "And it never was before, and if Erica hates you or us, that is gonna influence Mason." "Coop, I understand you're going through a rough patch." "But if you think you can blame me because an 8 year old doesn't want to share a corn dog with you, you have another thing coming." "(Speaking indistinctly)" "(Addison) Son of a bitch!" "Excuse me." " Hey." " Huh?" "Is everything okay?" "No." "I'm very definitely not okay." "I mean, you try to do one thing, one simple thing like rename the practice, and suddenly..." "I'm in a blizzard of-- of paperwork." "You know, I've got the building management people," "I've got the insurance company, oh, I've even got the guy who paints our damn parking spaces." "This is not what I signed up for!" "(Exhales deeply)" "Heavy is the head." "Seriously?" "Are you trying to piss me off?" "Because I'm looking for someone, anyone, whose face I can just... (Inhales deeply)" "(Exhales)" "It's not your fault." "(Crying) I'm sorry." "You have massive doses of hormones coursing through your veins, your emotions are elevated, your filter is gone." "You feel like you've been hit by a PMS truck." "No kidding." "How do I make this stop?" "Just breathe, okay?" "(Exhales)" "And if you start to feel like you want to cry or scream or rip somebody's face off, walk away." "Go someplace quiet." "Avoid emotional triggers, like" " Sam." " Hey." "Hey, man." "What's going on, sir?" "I was just giving Addison a pep talk on how to get through the paperwork." "Hang in there." "You okay?" "Yeah. (Chuckles)" "Oh, sweetie." "I'm right there with you." "(Groans)" "I hate this thing that's going on with Wes." "I feel so bad for his mother." "I feel bad for my mother." "I feel bad for all mothers everywhere." "Do you know that Wes was a perfectly normal kid up until he was Maya's age?" "So... you're worried that Maya might... (Chuckles)" "Have, um, a schizophrenic break?" "Yes, I am." "And I'm worried about a million other things because my baby girl's living in New York City..." "She's a blessing." "Maya is the biggest blessing..." "Of my life, but sometimes, I don't know." "Sometimes I just wonder if not having the burden of-- of the fear and the stress of having a child-- maybe-- maybe that's a blessing, too." "You know what I mean?" "Addie, where you going?" "I'm going for a walk." "Addie?" "(Cell phone rings)" "Addie?" "Yeah, this is Dr. Bennett." "Okay, I'll be right there." "So what happens af-- after I'm gone?" "I call the police." "I tell them I found you." "And they'll think I took pills?" "Hold this." "(Pills rattling)" "Put some fingerprints on it." "Sh" "Should I just take the pills?" "You could end up in an irreversible coma or with just..." "Really bad liver damage." "I don't want to get you in trouble." "I don't want you to suffer." "(I Hate You Just Kidding's "My Little Dove" playing)" "(Exhales)" "♪ Crows are crying ♪" "First I'll inject a benzo..." "To relax you, then a barbiturate." "♪ I keep trying ♪" "It'll put you under... ♪ But I can't keep up ♪" "And finally, potassium chloride." "♪ Coast is clear ♪" "It'll stop your heart." "Okay." "I'm ready." "♪ And then through the chatter ♪" "Okay." "♪ There's a... ♪" "♪ gentle song ♪" "♪ oh, little dove ♪" "♪ I can barely hear you ♪" "♪ won't you come more near?" "♪" "♪ you fill my ears ♪" "♪ with the songs I love ♪" "♪ they fill the air ♪" "♪ with ugly sounds ♪" "♪ but they could never drown out ♪" "♪ the song of my little dove ♪" "Thank you." "(Exhales deeply)" "♪ Oh, little dove ♪" "♪ I can barely hear you ♪" "♪ won't you come more near?" "♪" "♪ you fill my ears ♪" "♪ with the songs I love ♪" "I love you." "I know." "♪ Fill the air with ugly sounds ♪" "(Voice breaking) If you see my dad... ♪ Never drown out ♪" "You tell him I said hi, okay?" "Maybe I'll fix him up with my mom." "Yeah." "(Laughs)" "(Sniffles)" "♪" "(Exhales)" "(Sighs)" "(Gasps)" "Oh, why" " Why can't I breathe?" "You could be having an adverse reaction. (Gasps)" "I'm gonna keep going, okay?" "(Gasping)" "This barbiturate will depress your central nervous system." "(Continues gasping) Amelia." "Should I keep going or should I stop?" "(Continues gasping)" " I don't know what that means." " Stop." "Okay." "(Continues gasping)" "I'm stopping." "It's okay, Michelle." "I'm gonna call 9-1-1." "Michelle, it's okay." "Michelle, it's okay." "I'm stopping." "(Robotanists) ♪ ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "No!" "Get away from me!" "You're under their control." "He had a psychotic episode and collapsed on the street." "His mother called it in." "(Wes speaking indistinctly)" "He was upset." "He was ranting at-- at a kid on his cell phone" " and then he just dropped." " You can't listen to the machines 'cause they'll take over your mind!" "." "Can I get some help here?" "!" "Okay, he's got hypertrophic cardiomyopathy." "It's gone unmedicated." "It's probably arrhythmia." "(Wes speaking indistinctly) He came to in the ambulance and thought the EKG." " And every other machine was trying to kill him." " They're trying to attack me." "That's their plan." "Hard restraints, now." "No, can't you hear that?" "Can't you hear it?" "They're trying to send signals into our brain." " I have to get out of here." "It's not safe." " Look at me." "Okay, give me 5 milligrams of haloperidol IV." "I'm your friend, okay?" "You gotta trust me." "You're not my friend." "You're trying to poison me." " Sweetie, please..." "(Sam)" " Wes" " Let the doctors help you." " No!" " What are you doing to him?" "!" " We gotta put him on a psych hold for his own good." "Another 10 milligrams of haloperidol." "Make them stop!" "Don't let the machines get me!" " Haloperidol, 10 milligrams." " Please stop it!" "You're hurting him!" "Get her outta here." "No." "No!" "Aah!" "All right." "Mom!" "Mom!" "(Woman over PA) Dr. Wilder to the emergency bay." " Mom, don't leave me!" " Dr. Wilder to the emergency bay." "Don't let them do this to me, mom!" "It's respiratory distress secondary to benzo." "Okay." "I need .2 milligrams flumazenil IV and an O2 at 6 liters." "She got ahold of the drugs, Pete." "I don't know how." "But she did this herself." "I found her and... ♪ ..." "In all ♪" "She changed her mind." "She had a bad reaction to the benzo, and she changed her mind." "Okay, tox screen and pull an intubation tray." "Let me help." "No, Amelia, it's time to step back." "Please, Pete." "Amelia, it's time to go." "Go to the waiting room." "I'll keep you updated." "♪ ..." "So easy ♪" "♪ to be the ghost ♪" "♪ you're haunting ♪" "♪ the ghost ♪" "♪ you're haunting ♪" "♪ it's not easy ♪" "♪ to be ♪" "♪ the ghost ♪" "♪ you're haunting ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "So I've gotten to know all of the guys here, but you women are harder to crack." "You're like a coven." "Oh!" "God." "It's just the hormones." "Don't even pay attention to me." "I'm just being..." "(Sniffles)" "Ridiculous." "Oh, I've heard that before." "(Sighs) I feel like my brain is... broken." "And that." "I hate my boyfriend." "I've heard that the most." "Do you know he basically said it's a blessing that I can't have children?" "Doesn't sound like Sam." "Oh, yeah, yeah." "That's what he said." "It's a blessing." "A blessing?" "Really?" "For whom is it a blessing, him?" "I mean, is that the only reason that he's with me, because he thinks I'll never get pregnant?" "You know, because I prefer to think that it's because I'm awesome in the sack." " I don't know." " Addison, Addison, listen to me." "Okay?" "I can't get myself zipped." "You're brave to do this, okay?" "It's a brave and wonderful thing you're trying to do." "And all of the thoughts and tears and "I hate my boyfriend" talk, it's" "Oh." "It's just the hormones." "Okay?" "But the fact of the matter is, you cannot do this alone." "Oh, of course I can." "Lots of women do." "No, they don't." "Even single women, they have friends and family and book clubs." "(Chuckles) I mean, look, you're too afraid to tell anyone because you're trying to keep it a secret from your boyfriend." "I mean, what are you gonna tell Sam if you get pregnant or when you're 6 months along?" "What are you" " What are you gonna do when the baby comes, hide it in the liquor cabinet?" "I've seen the road you're heading down, and you're not gonna make it unless you have people on your team." "(Clears throat)" "Hey." "Hi." "Um, this isn't gonna..." "I have to cancel." "I'm sorry about the late notice." "What?" "Wait." "Why?" "Why?" "He had a meltdown ten minutes ago." "Sorry I didn't call you sooner, but I was kind of busy trying to talk him out of his bedroom." "It's not me." "Mason doesn't want to spend time with you." "Oh." "Did he say why?" "He's 8." "Who knows why?" "But if he doesn't want to spend time with you," "I can't force him." "Maybe that would change if he knew I was his father?" "You say you want to be a dad, but are you ready?" "I mean, I'm not talking about buying him stuff or pulling a quarter out of his ear." "I'm talking about, have you thought about making room in your life for him or your home?" "Have you talked to your bitch of a wife" " about" " Please don't call her that." "About how fatherhood would change your lives?" "Yes, I have." "I really have." "I get that she scared you off." "I get that you think that she's awful, and I must be awful if I'm married to her, but you really don't know her." "She's like a mama bear when she's threatened." "And you threatened her or she thought you were threatening me." "And so she, you know, growled loudly." "And she..." "Okay, the-- the metaphor wears thin." "But my point is, my wife loves me, and so she will love Mason, because I love him." "He's my son, and I love him." "And you were the one who showed up in my life to tell me that he exists, and I'm glad you did." "And maybe you wish you could take that back now, but you can't." "You wanted Mason to have a father?" "Now he does." "Now he does." "(The Bony King Of Nowhere's "Going Home" playing)" "Oh, hey." " Hey." " Have you seen Amelia?" "♪" "Are you okay?" "♪" "You're worried about him." "Yeah, I'm just waiting for Sam or anyone to come and update me 'cause I'm not allowed in his room." "That new lawyer is working overtime to reopen my case, so I am following the letter of the law." "No contact with my former patients." "But, um, yeah, I'm worried about him." "I'm worried about all of 'em." "It's gonna be okay, Violet." "♪" "How?" "I don't know." "I-I don't know how." "I just... ♪ Your hands waving ♪" "This is my favorite thing about you." "When I get the crazy eyes?" "(Laughs) No." "That's-- That's pretty cute, too." "But my favorite thing about you is how much you care about your patients." "I'm glad you're fighting the board." "♪" "I'm glad you're remembering things you like about me." "♪ The place I recently found ♪" "♪ is bound to fall ♪" "(Knock on door)" "(Sheldon) Amelia." "(Knocks)" "Amelia, open the door." "I know you're in there." "I saw yo car." "(Knocks)" "Amelia, open the door, because I'm not leaving until you do." "Amelia." "(Knocks)" "♪" "(Knocking)" "♪ Today ♪" "♪ I found ♪" "♪ my friend lying ♪" "Are you crazy?" "!" "Are you actually clinically insane?" "!" "Did you really do this thing?" "Because even I didn't think you were stupid enough and crazy enough to actually go through with it." "Do you get that you basically confessed your crime to me before you did it?" "You get that I couldn't should call the police?" "And-- and if that woman had died I would call the police, because I'm not gonna be an accesery to murder!" "What is wrong with you?" "!" "Why are you this self destructive?" "♪" "She didn't die?" "♪" "She's alive?" "Yes." "She's alive." "♪" "(Sobbing)" "♪" "(Continues sobbing)" "♪" "(Continues sobbing)" "(Sighs)" "(People speaking indistinctly)" "You ready to go?" "Yeah." "Whoa." "I got you." "You okay?" "I'm sorry." "I am so sorry." "Do not apologize to me." "I mean it." "I was so sure that I wanted to die, but now I don't-- I don't know." "I just" " I don't know if I panicked or" "Hey, you don't have to figure it out today." "Or tomorrow, for that matter." "I know it's not easy being alone." "Your mom had you, and you..." "You have me." "I will be there the whole way." "You can even move in if you want." "Oh, I couldn't do that to you." "You'd be helping me, too." "I know it doesn't compare to what you're going through, but..." "I struggle, too, every day." "Pills?" "Booze." "I'm branching out." "(Blows air)" "I didn't know." "I'm sorry." "(Sighs) You don't have to be sorry." "I mean, so we're both screwed up." "But maybe we can be there for each other, like some kind of..." "Like some kind of messed-up buddy system." "You know, I won't drink today if you don't kill yourself." "(Laughs)" "(Laughs) Deal?" "(Inhales)" "Deal." "(Monitor beeping rhythmically)" "We got his heart stabilized for now." "How you doing there, Wes?" "He can't hear you, not when he's like this." "That's why he could never stay on his meds." "He said it made him feel like he was 10 feet underwater." "Working with Dr. Turner helped." "But I knew it was just a matter of time." "(Beeping continues)" "We should talk about other options for Wes, what to do next." "I think that you should legally petition for a conservatorship." "You'll be able to make all of Wes' medical decisions, place him in a facility for his own safety" "No, we a" " We already went through all this." "Hear me out." "I'm not talking about a temporary psych hold here." " I'm talking about something" " I said no." "I'm not gonna put my son in some depressing clinic where they keep him locked up and drugged." "I can't" "I won't do that to him." "(Beeping continues)" "Uh, my sister Corinne..." "She was a lot like Wes." "She made a habit of disappearing, too." "My mother would do everything she could to keep her home." "But Corinne would always find a way out." "Uh, one day she left, and she never came back." "That was a long time ago, and I still don't know if she's dead or alive." "But I do know that my mother's never been the same." "I've never been the same." "I know that you love Wes and that you respect his right to be free." "But are you prepared for the day that he walks out of your life and disappears forever?" "I don't..." "My son is an artist." "He's a-a thinker." "He's funny and sharp and he's passionate." "Do you see that man, Dr. Bennett?" "I mean, do you see my son in this bed?" "If I keep him like this, then he's already disappeared." "(Beeping continues)" "Mm." "Mm." "Mm. (Chuckles)" "Carlos, Carlos, you have to leave." "(Whispers) My boyfriend's gonna be home soon." "Carlos?" "(Laughs) Mm-hmm." "(Laughs) (Normal voice) You know I have a soft spot for the Latin lovers." " You better watch it." " Oh!" "What's the matter?" "What happened?" "(Sighs)" "What's up?" "(Sighs) I started..." "I started IVF treatments a couple of days ago..." "Oh, okay." "And I" " I'm sore." "IVF." "Jake's been giving them to me." "Jake?" "Yeah, Jake's the only one who knows." "I-I didn't want the entire..." "Office gossiping about it." "I'm sorry." "No, no, it's okay." "Huh." "Um..." "I don't want to have another kid because I already got mine through." "What?" "Oh, I was..." "Terrified every single day of Maya's childhood." "But I got her through." "I mean, it was" " It was wonderful and it was terrible, both" " Equal parts." "And it's definitely an experience that you should have if that's what you want." "But..." "I just don't know if I have it in me to do it again." "But..." "That doesn't mean that I don't support you." "That doesn't mean that I don't love you." "And it doesn't mean that you get to keep secrets from me." "Okay?" "Okay." " Mnh-Mnh." "Mnh-Mnh." " Hmm?" " Oh." " Oh." "Hands off the ass." "(Whispers) I'm sorry." "Michelle, get in here." "We're doing girls' night in." "I got rocky road and a DVD of the second "Twilight" movie, the one with all the hot werewolves." "Michelle?" "(Inhales)" "(Exhales)" "She had a degenerative disease that was progressing rapidly." "It's painful, and she was taking oxycontin." "Those bottles hold 30 pills." "I found a bunch on the bed beside her, but..." "If she got half of them down, she didn't last long." "You all right, Dr. Shepherd?" "You have, uh, someone you can call?" "I'm all right." "You're sure?" "No." "I miss my friend." "So..." "I'm not all right." "But I will be." "I'll be fine." "All right." "(Door opens)" "(Door closes)" "Are you sure you won't ride in a taxi with me?" "Cars aren't safe, mom." "Please..." "Don't ride in cars." "The night sky is much better for you than cars." "Okay, honey." "You're gonna need some money." "Okay." "Okay?" "And I want you to have my phone number..." "And not lose it." "Thanks for saving me." "You're my hero." "You're mine." "You're still here." "Yeah." "I thought you might need a ride." "Thank you." "(Gate closes)" "(Door closes)" "(Footsteps approach)" "I'll be in the kitchen if you need me." "Okay, thanks for this." "Hey, Mason." "Hi." "So, uh..." "I had fun yesterday." "Um..." "And I'd love to, you know, keep hanging out." "If..." "If you don't like fishing, we can-- we can do..." "Something else, you know, whatever you want, really." "Um..." "Are you my dad?" "Um..." "I'm pretty sure you are." "I look like you, and mom acts weird when she talks about you." "Well, how would you feel about that?" "I don't know." "But if you're not gonna be around like all the other guys, we can't be friends." "(Amy Stroup) ♪ sunset ♪" "♪ I've waited for you all day ♪" "He is your dad, Mason." "♪ All day ♪" "I, uh, I am your dad." "And, uh," "♪ come quick ♪" "I'm not going anywhere." "♪ Always ♪" "♪ I'm ready for you always ♪" "So..." "You want to watch some "Phineas And Ferb"?" "It's good." "♪ You ♪" "Yeah." "♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ just you ♪" "♪ just you, just you ♪" "♪ just you ♪" "(Exhales)" "♪ Hear me out ♪" "♪ hear my feelings out loud ♪" "♪ I'm running ♪" "(Addison) Step one is the hardest." "I mean, they say that kind of about everything." "You know, it's like when you..." "Watch a baby take her first step." "I mean, she's spent days and weeks and months literally teaching her muscles how to function." "But once they do, it's never that hard again." "Okay." "You are all set." "♪ You, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "♪ ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh ♪" "Do you want to be my fertility doctor?" "I mean, mine's fine." "She's great, but..." "You're clearly the better choice for me." "I mean, that's assuming that you would still take me on." "I..." "I wouldn't blame you" " if you didn't" " Yes." "♪ Ooh, ooh, just you ♪" "(Man) So what muscle did you train in order to take this step?" "You'll laugh." "♪ Sunset ♪" "I won't." "♪ I've waited for you all day ♪" "Hope." "I had to..." "Learn to let myself hope." "♪ My love ♪"