"How long has your daughter had trouble breathing?" "About a week now." "The best dads wait two or more." "Yeah, no." "It's not like it's serious." "I checked online and it's asthma or something." ""Or something" is the number one killer of teens with no medical degree." "When was the last time he took you to see a doctor?" "Uh..." "Like five months ago." "We went to a clinic in Trenton." "I had strep throat." "Remember the antibiotic they gave you?" "Is it neomycin?" "Amoxicillin." "So, about the inhaler for my asthma, I was..." "Sorry." "Hospital policy specifically prohibits me from giving meds to unrelated homeless people pretending to be father and daughter." "Your pants are a size too short, so either you grew several of inches or you grabbed the closest size in the thrift store." "And only you have dimples, which are adorable, but they're also an X-linked dominant genetic trait." "Which actually doesn't prove anything." "The fact that she didn't burst into tears tells me that you never thought he was your dad." "Let's get out of here." "Since you're the brains of the operation, you might want to stick around." "What, so I can get busted by Social Services?" "No." "So you can stop bleeding out of your ear." "It's usually a sign of a skull fracture." "Someone been using your head as a soccer ball?" "No." "As much as I'd like to take your word for it," "I have no interest in taking your word for it." "No tenderness." "No pain." "Right." "Looks like you're telling the truth about something." "The ear canal is fine." "And you don't have a fever." "Pay the man." "He's late for a trashcan fire." "Would you tell me what's going on'?" "What's wrong with me'?" "I have no idea." "Why did you ask to meet us 30 miles away from the hospital?" "Because I can." "Also, Chris Christie's blog says the pancakes here are the best." "So, what do we got on this 18-year-old with the ear bleed and the breathing problems?" "CT confirms no skull fracture." "And looking at her confirms she's not 18." "Yes, she is." "Says so in the file." "We can't treat an underage patient without a guardian." "We need to call Social Services." "I cut a deal with the patient." "We don't call, she doesn't bolt." "Whatever age, living on the street makes her vulnerable to malnutrition, drug use, HIV..." "All things which could explain her symptoms." "No sign of malnutrition, lox screen's clear, STD panel was negative and is that Foreman?" "Oh, my goodness, it is." "Hi, Dean Foreman!" "Are you not gonna introduce us because we're married?" "No, wait, that's her." "She's a pharmaceutical rep, and this is a working breakfast." "In a restaurant that's nowhere near your home or the hospital'?" "Chris Christie recommends the pancakes." "Squamous cell middle ear tumor could've caused the ear bleed, paraneoplastic reaction caused the breathing problems." "Middle ear looks completely normal." "But there is thickening in the lining of the wall of the third ventricle." "Could be a sign of cerebral infection." "It would explain the lack of fever." "Pneumococcus is pretty common among the homeless population." "We should find out if she's been vaccinated." "Sure." "Ask her and when she refuses to tell you anything, start her on ceftriaxone for pneumococcus." "And if she says she has been vaccinated?" "Then don't believe her and start her on ceftriaxone for pneumococcus." "How about we don't believe she's gonna bolt and we call Social Services." "While I'm in the little boys' room, you can pretend I'm seriously considering that idea." "The bathroom's that way." "Pretty sure there's one in the hospital." "When I was your age, I ran away." "Lived on my own." "At the time, it seemed..." "Let me guess, life with mom and dad was kind of a drag so you just ran away, lived with friends and partied with guys that you knew your parents would hate, and then when you got tired of being a rebel, you just went home." "Being homeless isn't a vacation for me, and I'm not acting out." "My life at home sucked, so I got the hell out of there." "There are other options besides living on the streets." "Right." "Like group homes, where you're packed in with as many messed-up, delinquent kids as possible, foster parents, who only take you in because you're a meal ticket." "I can think of easier ways to make 175 bucks a week." "No, you're right." "I really should roll the dice and hope for a pair that don't ruin my life the way that my mom..." "Get your hands off my stuff!" "This stuff might tell us more about why you're sick." "A history textbook?" "You go to school?" "I don't plan on being homeless forever." "Hello, good sir." "My brother the general here gots the green apple quick step." "One of us is in the wrong time zone." "And if it's me, I need to talk to a stockbroker and anyone from the Kennedy family." "In that order." "He got the runs and we do need him up and at 'em for battle tomorrow." "It's hardly authentic, coming to a newfangled clinic, especially with a Yankee doctor." "Sir, are you questioning my resolve?" "Yes." "And your sanity." "I'm multi-tasking." "General, do not light out." "We swore that we would see the elephant together." "Far be it from me to come between two nut jobs and their elephant." "I could add some mercury if you want to make it more authentic." "The Confederacy thanks you, Doc." "I got House's phone, deleted all photos of you and Anita." "I owe you." "An affair?" "Never knew you were such a tramp." "Neither did I." "Anita, she's fun, smart, not looking for anything serious." "It's pretty perfect." "Except for the gnawing guilt about the husband, the lies she must be telling him." "But not guilty enough to stop seeing her." "She's smoking hot." "And ifs not his job to protect her marriage." "Aren't you supposed to be pointing a finger at your own life as a cautionary tale'?" "If not for cheating, I might still have a wife but I wouldn't have Sophie and Sophia." "Which means I wouldn't be preparing for their visit this week by child-locking all my cabinets, padding table corners and getting rid of every single magazine." "You could probably just hide the porn in your underwear drawer." "The magazines go away so I won't ignore my children." "I know I have to pay attention to them," "I want to pay attention to them." "But they're just so boring." "Did you learn anything at Jane Doe's school?" "They did a bunch of vaccinations, including pneumococcus." "Take her off the ceftriaxone." "So we're back to square none." "Not exactly." "The name she registered under seems to be fake, but the address is a foreclosed house." "We'll let you know what we find." "Plenty of food, water." "And beer." "She eats well, goes to school, makes good grades." "She's a homeless girl who's captain of the volleyball team." "How can you be okay with this?" "Your mom sends you to work with snacks." "I want and need parents." "Jane Doe is flourishing without them." "Maybe." "But this mold definitely is." "You went to my school?" "Now that they know they'll report me." "I can't go back there." "You may have a fungal infection, you need that medicine." "Fluconazole, right?" "I'll get it at a clinic." "I can't feel my legs!" "Is that the infection?" "I don't think so." "So, what causes an ear bleed, breathing problems and our runaway's inability to run away?" "Fungal infection's off the table." "What about transverse myelitis?" "Not with normal posterior column function." "I've been waiting to do this for months." "Pull!" "Sights seem to be off on this." "We didn't call Social Services before because we didn't want the patient to take off." "Now she can't." "There's no reason for us not to call." "How about the reason that there's no reason." "This is working fine for me." "Pull!" "That one clearly took evasive action." "You want to protect her, because you think she's fine on her own, outside the system..." "Does anyone have a position on our patient's medical condition?" "Could be endocarditis with septic emboli." "Pull!" "I'd turn around and shoot you, but apparently I'd miss." "There's no murmurs, no Osler nodes." "You've never done this before, have you?" "No, I have not." "But all the time I had my ankle monitor on' I was furious that I couldn't." "Vasculitis fits." "Start treatment with steroids." "If she's lucky, she'll be free to flee again." "Not once I call Social Services." "I'm not giving up." "You wanna bet?" "One shot, one birdie." "You hit, you make the call." "You miss, never mention it again." "No." "Why would I agree?" "Because your only other option is you call and I fire you." "Pull!" "She responding to corticosteroids?" "Looks like it." "And Social Services." "I thought for sure there'd be some yelling or profanity, possible bloodletting." "She's tired of living on the streets after all." "I'll bet House regrets..." "Could he know I'm good with a gun?" "I don't know how, but..." "Hiring a hooker to pretend to be a social worker?" "She took a bet that she knew she'd win." "Frankly, I feel violated." "What happened to the social worker I called?" "Apparently someone identifying themselves as Dr. Pujols called and said the patient ran off." "Come on, Poo-holes." "I've informed Social Services of the mistake and given Jane Doe's description to the cops." "They'll track down the parents." "Thank you." "I'll leave you and Dr. Pujols alone." "You should have told me you were treating an underage clinic patient." "I was giving you the gift of deniability." "Now I'm giving you the gift of additional clinic hours." "No, you're not." "You've got nothing on me." "Check your phone." "MY phone?" "Right, I guess I did have some pictures on that" "But I also have these." "Here's the two of you kissing over dinner." "Busting a move at a nightclub." "Is that your hand near her nether regions?" "Thanks again for taking out the ankle bracelet." "I'm not gonna let you blackmail me, House." "Of course not." "There's no way your selling out your integrity would let me compromise your job in any major way over some tawdry bit of gossip." "But what about compromising it in a minor way, reduced clinic hours, unlimited Internet porn budget." "That makes much more sense than the nuclear option of ruining both our lives." "You can keep these." "I got copies." "God, how I've missed the sweet smell of sticking it to the man." "Adams is right." "You're protecting this girl." "Oh, no, I was wrong." "That's the stench of moralizing." "I'm protecting myself from meddling bureaucrats and parents." "You admire this girl." "She had a horrible home life so she went out on her own." "She's your road not taken." "I've always dreamed of living in an abandoned house with mold." "House, all I'm accusing you of is having a connection with a patient." "This is a good thing." "It's not a good thing, 'cause it's not a thing." "It is a thing, which you'll prove when her parents show up, and you start protecting her from them." "The sound I make is "moo."" "And the sound I make is "quack."" "Moo!" "The sound is quack." "Quack, quack." "Quack, quack, quack." "I'm an ass." "On the plus side, I can now program my DVR from my phone." "They are kind of boring." "All kids." "Not just yours." "Very helpful." "You need to log more hours." "Eventually you'll pass boredom, get to bonding." "Like Stockholm syndrome." "I heard the nurses talking." "You called Social Services for real" "Because you shouldn't be living on your own." "Right." "Better my mom should use me as a punching bag." "If your mom abused you, Social Services won't let you go home with her." "Have I mentioned I don't trust the system?" "We don't know if you're better yet." "You can't just take off." "Uh..." "Can we help you?" "I'm Adele Brown from Social Services, and this..." "I'm Ellen Rogers, Callie's mother." "You haven't been that for two years." "I promise, things are different..." "Wow, two sentences in and you're already making promises." "Okay." "Maybe we need to take a minute here and give Callie some space." "No, I don't need a minute." "I need her out of my life." "Is she okay?" "I will be once you just... oh, my God!" "We need help in here!" "Go!" "You bet 100 bucks on a turtle race?" "I paid Mr. Chips 5 bucks to take a dive." "The bleeding stopped on its own." "She got worse after being on steroids, so autoimmune is out." "Diagnosis depends on whether the blood was coming from the sinuses, lungs or her guts." "Mr. Chips looks like he wants it." "100 bucks says he'll make soup out of Franklin." "You're on." "How'd the mom seem to you?" "If you're asking if she looks like someone who beat her kid, you're a moron." "Move your ass, Mr. Chips!" "You should have seen her face when mom walked in." "Callie hates her." "I don't think she's lying." "Because people never lie about people they hate." "Big sinus bleed could be sinusitis and a bleeding disorder." "She didn't complain about a headache." "If the bleeding is in her gut, could be Zollinger-Ellison." "Acid reflux causes asthma, and the acid erodes the stomach, causing the bleeding." "Yes!" "Franklin rules." "Mr. Chips drools." "Mr. Chips' owner only feeds him on apples and bananas." "Nowhere near enough Vitamin A. Pay up." "Do an upper endoscopy to confirm Zollinger-Ellison." "After mommy dearest has given her permission." "Ellen shouldn't have consent if she beat her daughter." "Doesn't matter if she beat her daughter." "Only matters if Social Services says she beat her daughter." "Good thing you made it all official." "Will the endoscopy be painful?" "Is that an issue?" "It's a medical procedure, there will be some discomfort." "I never meant to hurt my daughter." "And yet, you hit her." "She told you that?" "And now you're gonna tell me you didn't." "I'm a drug addict." "And I've been a lousy mom." "Especially since my husband died." "He was closer to Callie than I was, and I missed him so much." "And it was too hard, and taking oxy just made things easier." "Right up until it made me lose my daughter." "I hurt Callie a lot." "But one of the only things that I can feel okay about is that I never hit her." "Didn't peg you as the midday fun kind of guy." "So glad I was wrong." "Mmm..." "Unfortunately, that's not why we're here." "Remember that guy from the restaurant yesterday?" "Mmm-hmm." "He's got pictures of us." "He's threatening to show your husband." "I thought you said that guy was one of your best doctors." "Yeah." "Not one of my best people." "We've got to stop seeing each other." "Not necessarily." "I told my husband about you." "What?" "Why?" "He was saying that things had been better lately between him and I, that I was happier." "I said that I was, and that you were the reason." "And he was okay with that?" "Not initially." "It was a pretty tough conversation." "Neither of us is ready to give up on the marriage, and I am not ready to give up this." "You don't have to feel so guilty anymore." "You didn't need to shoot yourself." "I could have given you a Section 8." "We've hit the drills pretty hard, and by the fourth round, my hand went numb." "The gun slipped." "And I only had blanks in it but..." "It's funny how nearly shooting your toe off cured that speech impediment." "Ha!" "Yeah." "Sorry about that." "Sheldon's a progressive." "Compared to who?" "Rupert Murdoch?" "Progressives are reenactors who strive for complete authenticity." "They never drop character while in uniform." "Whereas you just dabble in crazy?" "Sheldon and I had a big falling out years ago." "We only really started talking again because of the reenactments." "They gave me my brother back." "That's a very moving story." "Be a lot more affecting if you hadn't bonded over something so completely idiotic." "Your mom didn't hit you, did she?" "No." "Then why did you lie about it?" "Because I wanted to get out of here." "People understand getting hit more than what my mom does." "Tell me, maybe I'll understand." "I was the mom." "She couldn't keep a job, spent all her money on pills." "I had to get a job." "Double shifts just to keep the power on, keep food in the house." "I couldn't tell you how many times she nearly OD'd and I had to clean her up and put her in bed." "So I decided if I was gonna be the grown-up," "I'd rather do it on my own terms." "Your mom knows she messed up." "She's determined not to do it again." "Yeah." "And she'll feel that way right up until things get too tough and she has to start using again." "Do you think people can change?" "No." "But I don't think that's gonna change your opinion because people don't change." "Stop." "Is that an ulcer?" "Yeah, it is." "But we haven't reached the stomach yet," "I'm still high in the esophagus." "Means it's not Zollinger-Ellison." "Ulcer's bleeding." "We need to lavage before she drowns in her own blood." "We cauterized the ulcer, stopped the bleeding." "Compromised immune system from living on the street could make her susceptible to HPV." "HPV was covered on the STD panel, she's negative." "What if she didn't get this from being homeless?" "What if she got it from her mom?" "I'm assuming you're thinking something genetic because..." "I'm thinking addiction." "Alcohol-induced esophagitis." "Explains esophageal ulcers and her other symptoms." "If only it would explain why we've never seen her drunk, drinking or detoxing." "Her blood pressure's been elevated." "Could be the DTs." "It's been mildly elevated." "Mildly elevated BP could put her at risk for a berry aneurysm." "Weak blood vessel in the brain gets pounded on by elevated BP, causes it to expand and contract, causes the symptoms to come and go." "CT didn't show any signs of an aneurysm." "Did I mention come and go?" "As much as your presence may cause objects to become engorged with blood, sometimes aneurysms just aren't in the mood." "Alcoholism and berry aneurysm are both valid theories." "I think we should discuss this with the patient and her mom." "Why?" "We've discussed it right here." "Tell them she needs a cerebral angiogram to locate the aneurysm, surgery to repair." "Brain surgery?" "When?" "We've booked the OR for an hour from now." "And Dr. House is sure that's what she has?" "He's confident in the diagnosis." "It's consistent with all of her symptoms." "But you don't buy it." "No." "I think your symptoms are the result of alcohol abuse." "But I'm not an alcoholic." "You came to the hospital with beer in your pocket, we found more alcohol at your house..." "Yeah, I use booze as payment." "I have an occasional beer with my friends." "That doesn't mean I have a problem." "I want the surgery." "Actually, it's your mom's decision." "I'm not an addict" "That's what I always said to you, Callie, but I had a problem." "I'm nothing like you." "Tell them to do the surgery." "I need a few minutes to think." "The patient asked me what I thought." "I pay you to think inside this room." "Outside this room, I pay you to parrot." "It's her choice." "She has the right to know." "It's a medical choice that you turned into an extension of your baggage and hers." "You told the mom something you want to believe because you don't want to believe that this girl might be doing fine parent-free." "Which also happens to be what the mom wants to believe..." "You think she wants to feel responsible for her daughter's illness?" "That woman sees everything to do with her daughter through guilt-colored glasses." "It's all her fault." "House, don't bully her, she's overwhelmed enough." "It's nothing compared to how she's gonna feel when her daughter dies from the aneurysm she decided not to treat." "You must be Dr. House." "I save my appearances for when parents are on the brink of doing something incredibly stupid." "Your daughter has a berry aneurysm, she needs surgery." "What she does not need is you making this or any other decision." "I can't just leave this up to her." "Then leave it up to me." "And just leave." "I'm not gonna abandon my daughter." "She hates you." "It's actually not such a big deal." "Plenty of kids hate their parents." "What makes it a big deal is that she should hate you." "Playing the biology card doesn't change anything except where she lives." "Your daughter's better off without you, so let her be better off without you." "I'm gonna do the surgery." "I'll take the fallout from Social Services." "Dr. House." "My daughter's care is my choice." "And so is this." "Treat her for alcoholism." "Peek-a-boo!" "Why would Anita tell her husband about our affair'?" "Probably just got sick of lying." "Look at it this way, now the sex is both commitment and guilt-free." "And men love commitment-free sex." "Yes, they do." "Oh, yes, they do." "They're gonna find out eventually." "Peek-a-boo." "How do you keep doing the same thing over and over with the same level of enthusiasm?" "First off, be a decent, empathetic person." "This is what you said you wanted, but you're actually more upset now that the husband knows." "Because I'm hurting him." "You always were." "But he didn't know that Which means he wasn't really hurt." "Yeah, I know it's a rationalization, but it went a long way to making me feel a little less guilty about seeing her." "Looks like you're gonna need a bigger rationalization." "Peek-a-boo." "Peek-a-boo." "Social Services report came in on your mom." "Let me guess, she passed with flying colors." "She always does." "I think she might make it this time." "House left a bottle of Vicodin to see if she'd steal it." "She gave it back." "You could at least let her sleep in the room." "She could have listened to me about my drinking." "Even if you are right about it, why take your word over mine'?" "I'm her daughter." "Because she's your mom." "And for the first time she's acting like it." "It's a little late for that." "Good night." "Morning." "I heard you went head-to-head with the mom." "Not for your reasons." "You're protecting the girl." "I'm protecting my diagnosis." "And you tested her, to see if you could get her back on drugs and out of her daughter's life." "That was to show Adams that mommy dearest hadn't changed." "I'm taking a principled stand against idealism." "Your patient's stable?" "Maybe Adams was right." "The illness is alcohol related." "I hope so considering that's what we're treating her for." "You hope you're wrong for the sake of the patient." "I hope that I'm right, but the aneurysm bursts without killing her." "Call me a softie." "Or the mom agrees to an autopsy so I can prove it." "Your patients love you because you're empathetic." "I also have kind eyes." "Why are you here?" "But you don't love all of your patients." "Of course not." "I'll bet some of them bore you." "Dull people get cancer too." "Why are you here?" "But you fake an interest in them because you need to, right?" "And if you do it long enough, it becomes real?" "Well, no, because the interest isn't fake." "Really?" "Because you realize they're not dull, it was just your misinterpretation of them." "I just haven't found a way to make them interesting yet." "It's all about common ground." "You find one thing you both like or hate." "John Woo movies, romance novels, kale." "Sometimes the best way to connect with someone is stop thinking about them and focus on yourself." "What is this about?" "Not everything has an agenda." "See ya." "I told him because it was the right thing to do." "Right." "This doesn't change anything between us." "It sort of does for me." "You want to stop seeing each other?" "No." "But I was thinking, maybe you could tell your husband that we did." "And then go back to sneaking around behind his back?" "Yes." "Why would you want to do that?" "I don't know." "This just feels wrong." "I think I'm gonna go." "Oh, God!" "We thought it was the salt pork..." "But all the menfolk been eating it and we're the only ones that sick." "Which one of you is the cheap bastard?" "Your uniforms are not wool They're polyester, cheap polyester." "Which gets processed with a heavy metal called antimony." "You wear badly processed polyester all day and night for days and nights, and you get antimony poisoning which causes your diarrhea and your numbness in your hands and your collective vomiting." "Polyester uniforms?" "I was being authentic." "With polyester uniforms?" "Confederacy gave men $21 every six months for uniforms..." "You poisoned us both." "At least I have principles." "Because they don't cost anything." "Brother against brother." "Now that is authentic." "I know you don't want me here, but they had banana muffins downstairs." "Reminded me of our St. Pete's trip." "Remember?" "We used to walk and get some every morning at that bakery." "I guess." "Were you high on that trip?" "Not when we were together." "I used to wait until you went to bed." "You can stay, if you want." "Okay." "Mmm." "It's not bad." "What's happening?" "Is this from the alcohol treatment?" "I was wrong." "The berry aneurysm must have just burst." "Temporal lobes are clear." "Parietal clear." "Get me a micro-vascular clip tray as well as the occlusion." "Check the ventricles." "Ventricles are clear, too." "Aneurysm must've leaked instead of burst." "Inject the dye." "Posterior cerebral clear." "Vertebral clear." "Circle of Willis also clear." "She doesn't have a berry aneurysm." "Her BP is dropping." "Start her on pressors." "Get her BP up before her organs start shutting down." "Adams." "With me." "The pressors will only give us a couple hours, max." "What causes breathing issues, bleeding issues, paralysis, loss of consciousness?" "What are we missing?" "That's everything bad that's happened." "What about the good stuff'?" "You mean, like, we should be more optimistic?" "She got a little better when we put her on steroids, which can attack tumor cells." "Maybe she has cancer." "No hypercalcaemia, no elevated blood proteins." "She and her mom mentioned a trip they took to Florida a couple of years ago." "What about dengue fever?" "Cholera?" "Great ideas." "If dengue fever or cholera laid in wall for two years before suddenly..." "Did your biological daughter go swimming in Florida?" "In a lake, or a pond, or an everglade?" "Yeah, there's a canal near my mother's house." "Do you know what's wrong with her?" "Family vacations kill." "Come with me." "Don't want to explain this twice." "You're letting in the flies." "And she needs an LVAD." "No, she doesn't." "Your daughter has ascariasis." "It's a disease caused by a parasitic worm found in feces." "Animals used the canal as a potty, and the eggs from the feces ended up in Callie's intestine when she went swimming." "Where they hung out, quietly and asymptomatically biding their time." "Until somewhere along the way, they got knocked loose, maybe a dive in volleyball practice, or maybe she slipped on her way into a soup kitchen." "But once they hatched, the worms got to work on her lungs, her ear, and the nerves in her legs." "The worms got agitated by the steroids we gave her, which started them on their journey to the esophagus." "And, ultimately, to the heart." "A few pills of mebendazole, and she'll be fine." "She's feeling much better, walking on her own." "Getting along with her mother?" "As long as I keep bringing her muffins." "Did someone come take her for a test?" "Callie agrees with you." "That people don't change." "She said when her mom slips again, she didn't want to be there." "She'd rather remember her like she is now." "Smart girl." "You got the ending you wanted." "Because I was only looking to solve the case, not their lives." "I don't care if the people who work for me are screwed up, in fact I even encourage it, but absolution, do that on your own time." "Or not at all." "Cause clearly you suck at it." "This is Aaron Rodgers." "Wow, 127 quarterback rating." "Do you know what sound he makes?" "Okay." "Ow!" "Um..." "This is Terrell Owens." "People call him T.O." "Do you know what sound he makes?" "This is Mark Sanchez." "Do you know what sound people make about him?" "Working late?" "Husband have her tonight?" "And every night." "She broke it off." "It's for the best." "I'm not really an affair guy after all." "Sure you are, buddy." "You just lost interest once it stopped being an affair." "That's why you're relieved." "But don't worry, it's not gonna end here." "You'll just have to get your adrenaline fix somewhere else." "When that doesn't do it anymore, you'll just escalate things somehow." "At least that's what I've been told." "I'm not like you, House." "True." "No limp."