"♪ Adventure Time ♪" "♪ Come on, grab your friends ♪" "♪ We'll go to very distant lands ♪" "♪ With Jake the dog and Finn the human ♪" "♪ The fun will never end ♪" "♪ It's Adventure Time ♪" "Yee-ow!" "Whoops." "And I dub thee sir Jake the dog." "You two now comprise the royal guard of the one true Princess of Ooo..." "That's me!" "As such, you may no longer own property or operate children and must render all treasure and wives unto your sworn princess within a hangman's fortnight." "Joke's on you, man." "We spent all our treasure the other day..." "Plus, don't even have any wives." "Wait, what?" "What about Lady?" "Lady's my girlfriend." "Wait, but..." "That was tree trunks." "Oh, yeah!" "We, the inhabitants of Ooo, owe you heroes our very lives." "As the once powerful and dignified Princess Bubblegum sulked off into exile, it fell upon you two to save us from the impending comet of doom and/or from the hideous Orgalorg, who aimed to eat the powerful comet" "and grow invincible!" "And for that, we are eternally grateful." "I know I am." "But now your bravery is essential to a new heroic task!" "Can you guess what it is?" "Uh..." "Come on." "Guess!" "Um..." "Fight a..." "Fight a dragon?" "Wrong!" "Follow me." "Man, this is stupid as heck." "I miss P.B." "Yeah, I guess." "Phew!" "I mean, except for this sweet armor, though." "This armor's hot like fire." "Nah." "The armor's stupid, too." "Dang King of Ooo, going around like D.J. Snappy." "This is it, fellas..." "The only spot in the kingdom left unscoured during my treasure census." "I'm afraid it'll explode or something if I open it." "But I really think there could..." "Nay, there might..." "Be precious treasures in there, so I want you two to do it." "Man, this seems like a really bad idea." "Yeah, well, it's an order from your princess." "Git, git, git!" "Hey!" "Come on!" "All right, all right!" "Hello." "We are the sworn protectors of the forbidden inner sanctum, heh." "Uh, to proceed, you must answer this ancient riddle." "I forgot the riddle." "That's okay." "I love you." "I love you, too." "Hey, there's stairs back here." "I love you guys." "Oh." "Whoa!" "Wait up." "It's a dragon..." "A candy dragon." "Look." "He sucks the vitamins from the roots and transforms it into candy juice." "And then..." "And then the juice goes in all those drains." "This..." "This is the lifeblood of the whole kingdom!" "Power, defense, recreation..." "This is everything!" " ♪ Mo-mo-mo-money ♪" " It cleans, it nourishes, and, and... ♪ Mo-mo-money, money, money ♪" "♪ Mo-mo-mo-money, money ♪" "Go on." "What are you talking about with all this money talk?" "Yeah, why are you singing the money song?" "What, you don't see it?" "They don't see it." "Look, everyone needs juice to live, right?" "And I control the source of the juice." "So by me charging a mere pittance for every single drop," "I can easily quadruple my treasure pile!" "Man, if you think we're just gonna stand here and..." "Although..." "If this dragon thing could pick up the pace a bit, we could have enough of a surplus left over to export worldwide!" "Hey!" "You there!" "What do you think about picking up the..." "Looks like the Candy Kingdom Empire is finished." "But the four of us will live like kings till the juice runs out." "What do ya say, boys, let's..." "Oh." "I wonder where they ran off to." "Princess, princess, princess!" "Princess!" "Princess, princess, princess, princess!" " Oh, hey, boys!" " Princess!" "Skliz is really blizzed up with the King of Ooo!" "He really blizzed up all the skliz!" "He blizzed it all up, man." "Yeah, well, maybe he should unblizz it, then." "Why do I always got to unblizz everything?" "But, princess, under the tree, there's..." "There's a dragon, and he took the juice." "Oh, no." "This is all my fault!" "Neddy." "Princess?" "Princess, what is it?" "That dragon you saw, he's my brother, Neddy." " Wha-a-a-a-a?" "!" " Wha-a-a-a-a?" "!" "We spawned together from the mothergum." "And now I'm all he has." "Neddy's very sensitive." "It's not safe for him out there." "He needs my help, and I'll need yours." "Wuh-oh." "Aaah!" "Ah!" "Hmm?" "Hmm?" "It's pretty quiet, huh?" "!" "Okay, guys, Neddy's in this cave." "I know because my bod-rod here is calibrated to our sister/brother bond." "Now, people frighten him, so I'm going in alone." "If he tries to run, stop him." "I don't think we can, he's a giant..." "Yup!" "Thanks, guys!" "This armor... is driving me... nuts!" "No way!" "I changed my mind." "I feel like a fancy shield." "Or if I was like a dangerous candlestick." "Like, a knight's candlestick." "You don't stretch, man." "This thing's cramping' my crimps!" "Whoo!" "Dude, I don't like that." "Aah!" "Neddy, you sweet weirdo." "Ooh!" "Ooh!" "Oh, no!" "I just want consistency!" "If the King of Ooo tries to come here again, you have my secret permission to stop him." "No holds barred..." "Moosewood stadium freestyle." "So what are you two up to now?" "Eh, guarding stuff, I guess." "Um... hey, Bonnie?" "You always act like a-a loner, right?" "But next to your brother, you're the light of the party." "Sorry, the light of the party." "I mean, yeah." "One of the first things I did after making sure Neddy was safe was to start making the candy people." "I was formed in the Mothergum." "My mind and my gum were in touch with dozens of others like a crowded womb." "I guess I miss that." "But Neddy's from the same place you're from, and he's a wet hot dog around everyone!" "People get built different." "We don't need to figure it out, we just need to respect it." "Maybe he likes his own company better than I like mine." "Well, do you miss the candy people?" "Hey, babaloos." "Good thing that juice is back on." "I was making a mint, but... hoo, doggy..." "My candles were starting to turn." "Thanks, Jake." "That's the stuff." "Hey, do you know if I can drink this?" "Like, is it like well water..." "Good for bathing, but not so good for drinking?" "You know what?" "I'm going for it." "Yep." "It tastes just like you'd think."