" Maybe Wilbur..." " Shut up!" "Damn it, damn it!" "Shut up!" "Shut up, you crappy alarm!" "Oh, yeah, Pickles!" " Pickles wakes up just like everyone else!" " What the hell are you people doing here?" "!" " Hi, Pickles!" " Oh, God!" "I forgot." " Will you be the father of my kids?" "!" " I hate Fan Day." "# Do anything for Dethklok Do anything for Dethklok #" "# Do anything for Dethklok #" "# Dethklok, Dethklok Dethklok, Dethklok #" "# I'll teach you #" "# Who rock #" "# Dethklok!" "Dethklok!" "#" "# Skwisgaar Skwigelf Taller than a tree #" "# Toki Wartooth Not a bumble bee #" "# William Murderface Murderface, Murderface #" "# Pickles the Drummer Doodily doo #" "# Ding-dong, Doodily doodily doo #" "# Nathan Explosion #" "It's being called the ticket of the century." "Mordhaus, the home of Dethklok will be open to the public for the first time... in celebration of this year's International Dethfan Day." "Banks have closed because customers are withdrawing all their life savings... in an attempt to purchase one of these coveted tickets." "An official statement from Dethklok calls this..." ""a psychotic day of insane celebration for regular jackoffs."" "Dethklok is opening their home to their fans." "It seems that their popularity is still growing at an alarming rate." "We get most of our Dethklok information by monitoring over 100,000 fan web sites... run by the Jomfru brothers Eric and Edgar." "They dropped out of Harvard to become dedicated Dethklok fans." "Their web site alone gets more hits than all of South America." "We can interrogate them later and find out what's really inside Mordhaus." "Yes." "Hey, pals!" "It's me..." "Face Bones." "Welcome to Mordland... home of the international metal band Dethklok." "Now, we got a big list of dos and don'ts because... we at Mordland like to run a really tight ship." "Remember: our snipers have new. 50 caliber rifles... that can kill you from almost 3 miles away." "And remember: deadly force is authorized, so do not ever enter into..." "And you have to use the restroom, make sure and don't go into the..." "And remember:" "no recording devices or cameras will be allowed... or your life will be terminated." "Now, Dethklok has decided to allow you to listen to one secret song... to be played one time only for you, the fans!" "Fan song!" "You hear that?" "!" "High-five!" "Why do I drink so much before stupid Fan Day?" "I believe you drink because it's Fan Day." "Don't talk to me about that." "Wait, where's Skwisgaar?" "Oh, I don't think he's gonna be here for a while." "He have a very big night with a very huge fan." " Yeah, we were all up late." " Not me." " I actually gots good rest." " Will you please just be quiet?" "What's wrong, Pickle?" "You just need to eat something." "Your name is Pickle." "Maybe you should try a pickle-herring sandwich..." "Famous from Oslo!" "Oh, yeah, Pickles!" "God!" "Everywhere I go, there's fans everywhere." "Can't I just throw up in my own house?" "!" "Oh, God!" "Don't!" "What are you, bulimia?" "Oh, great." "Now you're gonna start a whole chain reaction puke-a-thon." "Oh, blood puke!" "Good song title." "Someone write that..." "Oh." "That's right." "We already wrote that." "Good song though." "It should go back in the set list." "Oh." "I think I need another liver transplant." "Prepare to see one of the greatest sights you've ever seen..." "The fastest guitarist alive in his natural habitat." "Need paper towels." "OK." "My face is stucks to the wall." "Oh, crap." "In order to keep Nathan Explosion healthy... and because of the tremendous drinking it takes to entertain all Dethklok fans..." "Nathan must undergo a series of liver transplants." " Have you eaten anything this morning?" " Nope." " Are you sure?" " I mean, yeah." "I mean, no." "OK." "Anesthesia, please." "Hey, guys!" "It's me, Face Bones!" "Now is the time you've all been waiting for... your very own exclusive, super duper exclusive... fan song and one-time-only song video!" "Roll it." "You people out there give us something more than just record sales... you give us something to hate." "And we hate you, you brainless mutants." "# Hate, hate, hate, hate #" "# You hunched and blinded mutants Living in chat rooms #" "# You masturbate on the sheets #" "# Your mothers clean for you #" "# You have lined my pockets Overflowed with gold #" "# You're living with your parents And you're 35 years old #" "# You're a bunch of banks That I'd like to rob #" "# You're my online cash transaction #" "# You're my future stocks Transfer you like money #" "# To a Swiss account Spend you on an impulse buy #" "# And zero you all out #" "# Hate, hate, hate, hate #" "# I would like to get some sleep #" "# But you keep buying all our things #" "# My overhead is way too deep #" "# For us to not keep making these #" "# It's way too cynical, you see?" "#" "# Hating what's supporting me #" "# I am not you I thank the gods #" "# And if I were, I'd die like dogs #" "# Die, die, die, die, die #" "I'll be very glad when this is over with." "If they only knew how much we hated them." "I mean, they just keep crawling back like groveling putrid stupid zombies that... well, just want to eat out brains that is our art." " Hey, what are you doing?" " He's in a wheelchair, my lords." "I did not know what to do." "That does not means you get free lunch for entrance to everything." "Really?" "That's interesting." "What are you selling?" "You know, handicap stuff?" "No." "We want you to pay for a good review on our web site." "That's rich." "We are the fans." "We are the power." "Without us, your precious brutality means nothing." "Take a walk before I kill you." "Not so fast, Mr. Explosion... though I do appreciate your simplistic views... of smashing that which you don't understand." "Effective." "Oh, come on!" "Screw that Internet crap." "I mean, come on, what is the Internet, you know?" "Seriously." "What is the Internet?" "Perhaps you will give us more than a link when we debut this on our web site." "# Hate, hate, hate #" "# Hate, hate, hate, hate... #" "We've taken the liberty of appropriating your exclusive song which is ready... to be hyperlinked and sold exclusively on our web site with a single keystroke." "How about we have a link to the bottom of the stairs... by me throwing you to the bottom of the stairs?" "!" "I think not." "We'll give you the song back when we get the money and not a moment before." "Oh, whenever." "So..." "Where are you guys from?" "Sandusky, Ohio." "There's an amusement park there, right?" "Yes, there is an amusement park." "Well, that's always fun." "Your money's way down there... behind that door." "Can you see it?" "Hey, you better hurry up." "Closing time is in two minutes." "All the way over." "I'd serpentine if I were you." "It's showtime." "Why should we serpentine?" "Serpentine!" "Merci." "Bon café, Jean Pierre." "Thank you, my lord." "You give us something to hate." "But we hate you, you brainless mutants." "# You hunched and blinded mutants Living in chat rooms #" "# You masturbate on the sheets Your mothers clean for you #" "# You have lined my pockets Overflowed with gold #" "# You're living with your parents And you're 35 years old #" "# You're a bunch of banks That I'd like to rob #" "# You're my online cash transaction #" "# You're my future stocks Transfer you like money #" "# To a Swiss account Spend you on an impulse buy #" "# And zero you all out #"