"You'll need to take a shower with antiseptic soap in the morning to minimize the risk of infection." "I'll also prescribe a steroid, which will reduce the swelling in the brain." "It'll make, you know, removing the tumor easier." "Now, this is the surgical informed consent form." "This is the anesthesia consent form." " Shahir." " Hmm?" "I know all this." "I'm just being thorough." "This is a very important day for me." "For you?" "And for Charlie, of course." "And this is the consent for retention of pathology specimens." "Pen?" "Yes." "Cancer treatment during pregnancy is highly experimental." "There's an absence of clinical trials and very little information on long-term outlook." "I think Hope Zion can change that." "And..." "Am I boring you, Dr. Sekara?" "Uh, no, no, not at all, Dr. Lin." "Uh, your research pitch sounds awesome." "I think you're a shoo-in for fellow of the year." "He had a late night." "I did." "Because I'm single..." "Oh, please don't finish that." "And looking to mingle." "And Dr. Harris needs me... thankfully." "What happened to you two?" "When you arrived, you were hungry and driven and just dying to show me what you were made of." "And now you... you're yawning like a narcoleptic, and you're eye-humping Dr. Bishop so hard you need glasses with birth control." "Dr. Lin!" "I just don't want you to waste the opportunity that you've been given." "Having fun and enjoying life is not going to make us bad doctors." "It's not going to make you the best doctor, either." "Okay, Mr. Sandhu's hip replacement is at the end of the day, so you should go see him around noon." "That'll calm him down a bit." "Okay, well, I won't let you down, Dr. Harris." "Do I look worried?" "Actually, yes, you do." "Well, I'm not about my patients." "They're in good hands." "Thank you, Dr. Harris." "Oh, and good luck today." "Thank you." " Charlie." " Dawn, please don't ask me if I'm ready." "I always want to say I was born ready, and then we'll both be embarrassed for me." "you have always had a knack for lightening the mood." " Mm." " Let's go." "He was complaining of pain earlier." "It's in my stomach, not my chest." "I haven't eaten since yesterday, and my appetite's on steroids." "Well, I will bring you a bacon cheeseburger as soon as you're clear." "As a cardiac surgeon, I wouldn't recommend that." "See, that's why our marriage didn't work, Dawn." "You have no respect for bacon." "Pumping function is good." "You won't have a problem with the anesthesia." "You're in excellent health." "Please explain that to my brain tumor." "Which will be a distant memory as of noon today." "You have my stamp of approval." " Charlie?" " Hmm?" "Godspeed." "Alex, I'd like to talk to you for a second." "Sure." "Okay, well, I'll go track down Shahir." "He's probably not far, considering how important today is for him." "Everything okay?" "We should postpone your pitch." "The jury will understand, considering the circumstances." "No, Dawn, I'm ready for this." "And if you're not, you will jeopardize your shot at fellow of the year and all the money and the prestige that goes along with that." "Well, thank you for looking out for me, but honestly, I could use the distraction." "I'm needed in the ICU." "All right." "I'll see you at 5:00." "Okay." "Dr. Bell." "Good morning." "It is a good morning." "I had a fun time the other night." "So did I." "We should do it again." "Tonight probably." "You going up?" "I am, but you work on this floor, and you just got off." "Doesn't mean I can't go for a little adventure and see the world." "Are you gonna get that?" "I wasn't planning on it." "You're an emergency doctor." "It could be an emergency." "Whoa!" "Oh." "Can someone hit 2 for me, please?" "Yep." "Mm." "Morning, Dr. Bell." "Dr. Miller." "Have a nice ride in, Dr. Sharpe?" "I was a little cold, but there's a saying in cycling..." ""I can't feel my testicles"?" "Oh, this is my floor." "See you in the O.R." "You should be nicer to him." "He's saving the environment." "Get over here." "Oh." "What?" "Hmm." "How's our patient?" "She's not showing any signs of coming out of this coma." "Well, Charlie was like that for three months." "It can take a while." "There's also this." "That's why I paged you." "Her temperature's up." "Yeah, it has been since yesterday." "It could be a sign of infection." "Check her central line again." "I need blood, urine, and sputum cultures, please." " What did you do?" " Nothing." "Her B.P.'s sinking like a stone." "She's bradycardic." "Her O2 sats are in the 70s." "Heart rate's through the roof." "Her jugular veins are descended." "I'm thinking pulmonary embolism." "Get me clot busters and mannitol." "Come on, Kristine." "Stay with me here." "Doll's eye reflex is positive." "Someone page neuro!" "It's finally over, Charlie." "Now help me get to my baby." "We did everything we could." "It just... it just happened so fast." "She threw a clot, and we couldn't restore blood flow in time." "She's brain-dead?" "Well, I have to run an E.E.G., an apnea test, and a full neuro exam, but yes." "Charlie, what are you doing here?" "I paged him." "They were friends." "Oh." "I'm sorry for your loss." "But you should be in pre-op on a steroid drip." "Yeah, I'm headed straight there." "I just..." "I need a minute." "Let's clear the room." "Give Charlie a chance to say goodbye." "I've only ever helped palliative patients cross over." "It's pretty straightforward." "How does it work when you do it?" "Oh, I'm pretty sure it's the same." "I... ask them what they want." "They tell me." "I try and do it." "All I want is to be reunited with Maddie." "That's all I've ever wanted since the accident." "Well, maybe there's something you need to resolve before you... you go." "Help me figure out what it is." "Kris, I have surgery in an hour." "You can't leave me here like this." "Please, Charlie." "You're all I have." "All work and no play makes Maggie a dull girl." "All play and no work make you a cliché." "Oh, ouch." "I'll have you know I'm no longer doing that." "By "that," you mean the entire nursing staff?" "Meow." "I'm sorry." "It's this pitch." "It has me on edge." "I snapped at the residents earlier." "Well, they probably deserved it." "Don't worry." "You're gonna be great." "I know you're going to be." "Hot date?" "No, it's my ex who wants to talk." "I'll call her after work." "Want to get a drink after?" "Help me unwind?" "It's karaoke night at Clinton's." "That sounds great, actually, but, uh, I've got plans tonight." "Oh, yeah?" "With whom?" "You don't know her..m." "Did you just say "herm"?" "Yep." "Buddy Herman." "I call him... "Herm" for short." "Okay, do you want to bring him?" "It's been a while since we've done our "total eclipse of the heart" duet." "Let's give the people what they want." "River Wallace, 32!" "Severe abdominal pain and nausea." "History of liver disease." "Hi, River." "I'm Dr. Lin." "This is Dr. Miller." "Can I have a look at your belly, please?" "Yes." "How long has it been this swollen?" "A couple of weeks." "I'm just gonna take a little look here." "Okay." "Eyes are jaundiced." "Okay, let's check for fluid thrill." "What is that?" "It's just a cool name for fluid in the belly." "Okay, that's a positive." "I'm gonna run a F.A.S.T." "See if it's blood or ascitic fluid." "There's something wrong with her neck." "Spider angiomas." "I think I'm gonna be sick." "Okay." "Okay, it's clear." "It's not blood." "What's that?" "You said there wasn't any blood in her belly." "Uh, there isn't." "It means it's coming from her esophagus." "Someone get Dr. Bishop." "It's okay." "Dr. Harris' technique is immaculate." "Asha, no one's expecting you to be as good as he is." "I am." "Dr. Mirani." "Yes, Dr. Hamza?" "Why is my surgery..." "Dr. Harris' surgery bumped to this evening?" "I don't know." "Oh, so you have no idea why your hip replacement has taken his place?" "N-no." "Do you know anything?" "Depends who you ask." "Shahir." "I'm looking for you." "But I can see you already heard." " You bumped our surgery?" " Yeah." "Dr. Mirani worked overnight." "She's almost at her 30-hour max." "We need to get her into the O.R. while she's still fresh." "What about me?" "You're always fresh." "Yes, that's true." "Shahir, look, my brain can wait." "It's her first lead surgery." "Come on." "You remember your first time." "Yeah, I do." " Okay." " The blood you vomited... it's coming from ruptured veins in your esophagus caused by your liver disease." "Can you fix them?" "It's a relatively simple procedure." "We're gonna go through your throat and inject a solution into the abnormal veins, which will clot and shrink them." "Now, we rarely see liver failure in patients so young." "Yeah, I, uh, caught hep "B" at a nail salon." "They weren't cleaning their tools properly." "I guess that's what you get when you pay 15 bucks for a mani-pedi." "Her doctors caught it late." "Her liver was already in rough shape." "Are you on a transplant list?" " At the top, actually." " Good." "Just waiting for this thing to go off." "Could be any time now." "And we want you in top shape when that happens." "That sounds... really good." "Babe, what's wrong?" "Uh, just I'm having a bit of trouble catching my breath." "Okay, the diuretics aren't working fast enough." "I think the fluid in your belly is putting pressure on your lungs." "Your breathing won't get better unless we drain it." "I'll prepare a paracentesis." "Okay." "Okay, relax." "Stay calm." "We'll take care of you... of both of you." "Okay." "Oh, hey, you don't want that one." "It's expired, see?" "Mm." "That's disgusting." "Expire dates are just a recommendation." "Yeah, well, it's kind of hard to have steady hands when your stomach's doing back flips." "Not to mention the other possible outcome." "Now who's being disgusting?" "I'm just saying you don't want anything to distract you from those power tools." "Yeah, I still can't believe Dr. Harris is bumping his own surgery for me." "I'm sorry." "What did you just say?" "Excuse me." "This is a local anesthetic." "It'll numb the area so you won't feel anything." "Maybe you can put some of that in my hand." "My husband keeps trying to squeeze it off." "Sorry, babe." "Just trying to be supportive." "I know." "I'm gonna use the ultrasound to guide the drainage tube so we avoid the organs, okay?" "How long have you two been married?" " Two years." " 26 years." "You guys need to check your story." "Well, our families moved next door to each other when we were 5." "Two weeks later, I asked her to marry me with a ukulele string tied in a knot." "We had the ceremony on the tracks behind our house, and the train came before I could say "I do,"" "hence the discrepancy." "Can you feel that?" "No." "Yeah, we stayed friends all through high school, college." "And then we decided if we're both single at 30, we'd get together." "Yeah." "I mean, it was a little bit weird at first, but it didn't take long for me to fall hard." "I mean, look at him." "He's the best." "I'm gonna need you to look away for a second, okay?" "Hold on." "Why is her heart racing like that?" "That's not River's heartbeat." "That's your baby's." "Our what?" "By the looks of it, this little peanut is about 25 weeks along." "How... how is that possible?" "My doctor said that I was infertile because of my liver damage." "That's often the case, but not always." "Yeah, liver damage can mirror the symptoms of pregnancy... missed periods, nausea, bloating, headaches." "It's a miracle, River." "That's what this is." "We're gonna have a baby." "This complicates things." "Let's give them a moment before we tell them the bad news." "Male announcer:" "Dr. Carter, to obstetrics, please." "Dr. Carter, please report to obstetrics." "Hey." "I tried to call you." "Why did you bump your surgery?" "Asha's been on for 24 hours." "The truth." "Kristine needs my help to cross over." "Charlie, come on." "Alex, the last time she asked for my help," "I turned her away, and then she wrapped her car around a tree." "Well, you can't blame yourself for that." "I kind of do." "A little bit." "One last ghost." "How can I help?" "You told me a few months ago that you had a patient that couldn't cross over." "Is that what you called it?" "Cross over, pass on..." "I prefer "pop," but, you know, it's dealer's choice, really." "Well, you tried everything, but he didn't pop until he was removed from life support." "Could that be what's keeping Kristine here?" "It makes sense." "I don't know, but even if that was the case, there's no one to pull the plug." "Let me work on that." "I don't know if she's helping because she cares or just to get rid of me, but..." "Either way, I'm grateful." "I'm sorry for any tension I might have caused between the two of you." "Alex and I have weathered so many storms it would take a hurricane to break us apart." "Now, you said that you didn't have any immediate family." "What about long-lost relatives?" "I have a great aunt who lives in Flint." "But I'm not even sure if she's still alive." "It's a start." "Okay, let's, uh, take a few minutes." "Excuse me." "You're about seven hours early, Alex." "I need to talk to you about something." "What is it?" "How long would it take to have a consent and capacity hearing to review Kristine Field's case?" "She died." "I hadn't heard." "Yes, uh, had a stroke this morning." "Shahir pronounced brain death, but there are no next of kin, so I need the board to rule to withdraw life support." "Is that what she wanted?" "Yes." "She told Charlie." "Uh, well, Charlie, as her friend, can apply to be a public guardian, but that could take a week or so to file that paperwork." "A week?" "Yeah, these things take time, Alex." "Okay, well, there's got to be something we can do." "Why can't you just drain her belly like you said?" "Because it could cause premature labor, and the baby is barely viable as it is." "We'll up the diuretics, turn our attention to fixing the bleeding in your esophagus." "We want you as healthy as possible so you can carry the baby to full term and then have your transplant." "What do you mean, "and then"?" "River, we don't do transplants on pregnant women." "I'm sorry." "Nobody does." "There must be a way." "I-I've done the research." "It's a 50-50 chance that you wouldn't survive the anesthetic, and even if you did, there could be birth defects." "But she's next on the list." "Which is why we need to have a conversation about the realities of your condition." "What realities?" "If the procedure causes you to go into labor," "I need you guys to really think about whether you could care for a baby that premature." "Especially considering all the care River needs, and will need, even after your transplant." "We want you to do whatever you have to do to save him..." "Or her." "I don't..." "We didn't ask." "We don't know." "It's a girl." "It's a girl." "Our little miracle baby girl." "Okay." "I'm ready." "All right." "Let's get you up to endoscopy." " Ready?" " Yeah." "Why do I feel like whatever comes their way, they'll be fine?" "The benefits of marrying your best friend, I guess." "Maggs, I need you to sign off on your patient in bed one." "Okay." "Yeah." "Yes, I understand that, but if I could... if I could just speak with her." "I realize that." "Okay." "Thank you... for nothing." "Hey." "I managed to track down Kristine's great aunt Gertie." "The only problem is she has Alzheimer's." "She doesn't even have legal capacity over herself." "I need you to come with me right now." "Dawn called in a favor with H.R." "They dug up a name... someone who was listed on Kristine's benefits a few years ago." "This is him." "Arlo?" "Hi." "You must be Alex?" "Yes, thank you for coming." "Arlo Fields, this is Charlie Harris." "Thank you for being a friend to my wife in her final days." "Your wife?" "Uh, my ex-wife." "Sorry, I never really got used to calling Kristine that." "We're very sorry for your loss." "Well, you know, I haven't seen her in years, but I'm not sure I'm ready to see her on life support." "Well, if it helps, she's not in any pain." "Good." "She's suffered enough." "Oh, this is my family here." "This is my wife, uh, Julia." " Nice to meet you." " You too." "Hello." "Hi." "What's your name?" "Maddie." "Maddie's mine and Kristine's little girl." "Maddie, let's go for a walk so your dad can talk to the doctors." "Yeah." "Why don't you and Julia go to the café and get yourself a little breakfast?" "No cake pops, promise?" "I promise." "Can I have my magazine?" "What do you say?" "Please and thank you." "Good girl." "She's, uh... she's really into science." "She must have gotten that from her mother." "Something wrong?" "We didn't realize that Maddie was..." "Well, I don't really know how to say this." "Kristine told me that, um," "Maddie had been in a car accident with a drunk driver." "She was." "She told me Maddie died." "She what?" "Yes, Kristine was in an accident with Maddie, but she was the one that was driving... drunk." "And, uh, it wasn't the first time." "That's why I left her." "And you took Maddie with you." "Well, I had to protect her." "You didn't have any kind of relationship with her after that?" "Kristine never saw Maddie?" "Well, I tried to reach out for a couple years." "I invited her to every birthday party, dance recitals, but she never came." "She... she never even called." "I'd completely lost track of her until you called me today." "Will you excuse me?" "Sure." "You know, uh, Maddie hasn't seen her mother since she was 4." "And... and we told her in the car on the way over why we were coming here." "But I..." "I don't think she understood." "All right, let's get that octreotide infusion flowing." "We need her portal pressure down." "Will do." "You need something, Dr. Williams?" "Dr. Lin paged me." "I'm on baby duty." "I thought Dr. Bishop could use a buddy." "Dr. Sekara's performing an esophagogastroduodenoscopy before, if you'd prefer..." "No, if you can say the word, you can stay." "Okay, then." "River, this is Dr. Williams." "She's gonna be assisting us." "Okay, let's work fast." "I don't want us to be here any longer than we need to." "Do you want to help me with the monitors?" "Yeah, what are these for?" "This is a fetal heart-rate monitor, and that's a to-co to watch her contractions." "She's in labor?" "Nope, she's not." "And I want to keep it that way." "Nurse, will you page the lab for me, please?" "Make sure they have plenty of O-positive on standby." "If any of these mucosa tear, and we'll have a ton of bleeding." "Okay, settle in, little peanut." "Dr. Williams, would you like to administer the lidocaine?" "Sure." "Your esophagus is frozen." "All right." "Here we go." "Endoscope, please." "You played me." "You made me jeopardize my health." "For what?" "I-I don't know what you're talking about." "You used the fact that I was a father to manipulate me, sell me some sob story about your dead little girl and the bastard who drove you off the road." "Charlie, stop it!" "Maddie's alive!" "Game's over." "I'm done." "Why would you say those things?" "Why, Charlie?" "Charlie, what is it?" "I think I know why Kristine is still here." "All right, there they are." "In the sub-mucosa of the distal esophagus." "Wow, the veins are... is... is there a less gross word than "engorged"?" "There's less gross." "Not as accurate." "How's that sodium tetradecyl sulfate coming?" "Loading up. 0.75 milliliters." "3% concentration." "Good." "All right." "Why don't we start with that bad boy there." "Just injecting the solution into the base of the varix." "How's our baby, Dr. Lin?" "So far, so good." "Hmm." "There's nothing like that sound." "Do you want to have kids?" "In general." "Not with me." "Not... just not right this second." "Better not be." "I have my hands full." "Wow, it coagulates so quickly." "Yeah, it's like esophageal whack-a-mole." "Flush, please." "Dr. Bishop, can I do the next one?" "Feeling brave." "I like it." "Sharpe?" "It's not mama." "She's stable." "Everyone stop what you're doing." "River's having contractions." "I need an I.V. bolus and 100 megs indomethacin now." " Okay." " Dr. Lin, should we be doing that, considering her pulmonary function is already compromised?" "We don't have a choice." "These contractions need to stop." "The baby is barely viable." "Okay, River, River, it's gonna be all right, okay?" " Sharpe?" " I'm in." "Dr. Lin, we need to get back in there." "She's still bleeding." "Give me a minute." "Please." "It's not working." "Another 0.25 milligrams indomethacin right now." "Okay." "Okay, come on, little girl." "Relax." " Got it?" " Yeah." "No, damn it." "Okay, you're gonna have to help me turn her." "Aah!" "River, River, breathe deeply for me, okay?" " C-clamp stirrups." " On it." "We're gonna deliver this baby now." "That kind of break in reality..." "Kristine has some deep-seated psych issues." "Yeah, I practically tore her head off, and now I need her to trust me." "Well, just get her upstairs, and I'll do the rest." "Okay." "Kris, we need to talk." "I know how to help you." "You can't say those things about me... about my daughter..." "and then just take them back." "I don't know what I was thinking, okay?" "Maybe it's... maybe it's the tumor." "Maybe..." "Maybe I really am starting to lose it." "But after my surgery, I might not be able to see you." "And if that happens..." "I'll be stuck here." "Yeah." "Maybe forever." "I think I know how to get you back to Maddie." "But you have to trust me." "I have the informed consent form here, but there's no rush." "Are you sure this is what she wanted?" "She talked to Charlie about this, and she didn't want to be kept alive after brain death." "I-I still don't know what I'm gonna say to Maddie about all this." "Tell her the truth." "Tell her that Kristine loved her and that she never stopped thinking about her." "But she was too sick to be her mom." "And... and that's not her fault." "You... you seem to know a lot about this." "My father committed suicide when I was a kid." "It turns out he was sick... terminal." "I really wish I'd known that at the time." "It would have made a world of difference to me." "Kristine grew up in the foster-care system." "She got bounced around a lot, which was probably a good thing, considering some of the families they put her with." "She started drinking when she was 13." "She never mentioned that to Charlie." "Well, why would she..." "When she fought so hard for her sobriety?" "And when she was sober, she..." "She was the most amazing woman." "She was incredible with Maddie." "Maddie was the light of her life." "I can't imagine what Kristine felt struggling with her sobriety on top of all the other baggage mothers carry with them." "There were terrible times." "But whenever Maddie talks about her, she... she only talks about the good stuff." "I hope she finally finds peace." "Me too." "Daddy." "Sweetie." "Sweetie!" "Come here." "Come here and sit with me." "I need to talk to you about mommy." "She loved you so much, Maddie." "She loved you so much." "Thank you." "Now's our time to say goodbye." "But not forever." "She will always be with you." "She loved you, Maddie." "There she is... our little girl." "What should we name her?" "How about Mireya?" "It's spanish." "It means "miracle."" "Do you like it?" "It's perfect." "Is River okay?" "Yes." "But, Billy..." "Oh, no." "She was born with no vitals." "And we couldn't resuscitate her." "I'm so sorry." "Have either of you seen Dr. Lin?" "It's her turn to pitch." "I think she's in the lounge." "Okay." "Ah, Dr. Mirani, congratulations on your first lead ortho surgery." "Thanks, Dr. Bell." "We're going out to celebrate after shift, in case you want to join us." "Thank you for the invitation, but I will be hearing fellowship pitches all evening." "And I'm also your boss." " Right." " Okay." "Maggie." "Hey, I got your text." "What's wrong?" "Life's too short." "Today I met two beautiful people, and they fell in love after a lifetime of friendship." "They went through something horrible, and they had each other." "Come here." "It's okay." "I thought that all that mattered was this job." "What if we could be like them?" "What if we could have each other?" "It makes sense." "We love each other." "You have kids." "I'm great with kids." "Maggie, think about what you're saying." "I have... thought about it." "And life's too short." "Maggie..." "You know that I adore you, but..." "I know." "It's not there yet, but it could be eventually." "What you're feeling is not about me." "This is about your patient and her husband and her kid." "Well, we could try." "What do we have to lose?" "We're both single." "Maggie..." "Stop." "Are you seeing someone?" "Who is it?" "It doesn't matter." "Yeah, it does." "Dawn." "I have to go pitch my research project... to your girlfriend." "Maggie." "Hey." "Hey." "Punching out early?" "I'm just changing into fresh scrubs." "It's a little ritual I have when I lose someone." "You didn't lose that little girl." "She just wasn't strong enough." "Look, I'm not really in the mood for feeling better, but thank you for trying." " Jeremy, stop." " I can't." "I can't." "Look, with Charlie and the baby," "I just got to keep moving, all right?" "I don't know, I just can't." "Yes, you can." "Remember I told you it never gets any easier." "It can." "Dr. Lin." "Welcome." "Dr. Greengrass, Dr. Bell, Dr. Leroux." "I have prepared a presentation to support my pitch." "Finally, a little showmanship." "Cervical cancer treatment during pregnancy is highly experimental." "Dr. Lin." "Are you all right?" "Sorry, um..." "Um..." "Currently, the standard management of stage I-B1 cervical cancer in pregnant women is termination of pregnancy." "Dr. Lin, do you need to take a minute?" "I'm fine." "Sorry, just give me a second." "Uh..." "I really think you should take a moment." "I'm fine." "Dr. Lin, take a moment and come back when you're ready." "Whatever you think, Dr. Bell." "Excuse me." "Ariel, I really cannot deal with this today." "Because they're my kids, too, and you can't just move them to Vancouver." "Hello?" "You won't believe the day that I am having." "It's looking up, though." "So, Maggie Lin... has been laser-focused on winning this fellowship award since day one." "She's been working her ass off on her pitch, exhausting herself in the O.R." "And then today, it came time to cash in on all that hard work." "She fell apart." "She tanked her pitch?" "That's, um, 'cause she lost a patient." "I should go talk to her." "Do you know where she is?" "No." "Zach, I, um..." "I want you to disregard what's happened between us." "What are you talking about?" "It's a small hospital." "I'm the chief of surgery." "I shouldn't be getting involved with my subordinates." "Dawn, you keep forgetting I don't work for you." "Dr. Bell." "We're reconvening." "Okay, thank you, Richard." "What's going on here?" "Nothing." "Not anymore." "I got to go." "The jury's waiting." "Dawn." "I walked by the office earlier." "The new color looks good." "It was the right choice." "Hey, uh, could you just stop for a minute, please?" "I'll see you soon, huh?" "Alex..." "What if this doesn't, uh, take care of the problem?" "I love you, no matter what." "I love you." "See you on the other side." "Mm-hmm." "Take care of him, Shahir." "Of course." "Baby." "Babe, hey." "All right." "You ready, Charlie?" "I was born ready, Wayne." "Okay, chuckles." "Count back from 50 for me." "All right?" "50, 49... 48... 47..." "Here we go again." "Interesting tidbit about Beethoven... you know, his hearing loss might've been caused by habitually immersing his head in cold water to stay awake." "Yes, doctor, you've mentioned that." "I have?" "Déjà vu." "French psychic Emile Boirac coined the term." "Means "already seen,"" "a feeling of having already experienced the present situation." "science considers this a trick of memory, nothing else." "Perforator." "But one thing I've learned?" "There's a lot that science can't explain." "Turn up the music." ""God counts the tears of women."" "I say we start counting them ourselves by making women's health a top priority right here at Hope Zion." "Thank you." "Thank you, Dr. Reid." "Great job." "Alex, can I have a word?" "Of course." "Well-researched, articulate." "I don't know how he is yet." "The procedure just started, but I'll let you know." "I'm that transparent." "Kind of." "You did great in there." "You did not need to pitch today." "I know, but like I said, I was happy for the distraction." "He's in good hands." "The best." "Courage, right?" "Cassie, your heart's upside-down." "Sorry?" "Oh." "Thanks." "Don't mention it." " Dr. Reid?" " Mm-hmm?" "How's Dr. Harris?" "Uh, they just brought him in." "The tumor's small and benign, so nothing to worry about, right?" "Yeah." "Except maybe your own patients." " Huh?" " Oh." "This in-between place... some people call it purgatory, where you go to be cleansed, make you worthy of entering heaven." "And the atheists, well, I don't really buy what they're selling anymore." "That's another thing I've learned." "In our moment of reckoning, everybody worships something." "God, money, beauty." "I worship you, Alex." "And no matter what happens, I will find my way back to you." "Real-estate listings..." "Vancouver?" "Yeah." "That's where my ex is moving with our boys." "You okay with that?" "Nope." "But messy custody battle." "Nobody wants that, especially me." "So you thought you'd just move out there, cramp her style instead, huh?" "Considering it." "I don't know." "Look, holidays, weekends..." "that's what my old man did." "Look at me." "Superstar." "I don't know." "Change of pace." "Maybe I need something new." "Man, you're full of surprises this morning, Dr. Miller." "All right, thank you." "Get on it." "I am definitely full of something, Jackson." "Heads up!" "What do we got?" "Deshawn Lewis... 16." "Part of a talent showcase down at the waterfront." "He complained of shortness of breath before he collapsed during rehearsal." "Hi, Deshawn." "I'm Dr. Lin." "Let's take a look here." "My mom... she's in Halifax." "We'll contact her right away." "She doesn't even know I'm in Toronto." "What do we got?" "Take a listen to this, please?" " Yep." " This is Deshawn." "She thinks I'm crashing at a friend's house for the weekend." "That doesn't sound good." "Page Dawn." "Great." "The person I just bombed my pitch in front of." "Yes, I heard." "I was looking for you." "I'm not feeling so good." "Deshawn?" "Deshawn?" " He's seizing." " I need two milligrams of lorazepam, and get me some phenytoin in case he's not responding!" "Let's go!" "Well, Mrs. Donaldson, I'm happy to announce that you have the heart of a much younger woman." "Great." "Now if only these fun bags didn't sag so much." "Oh." "Right, then." "Hi." "I'm Dr. Williams." "Come have a seat." "I'm actually looking for Dr. Jeremy Bishop." "Oh." "Are you a patient of his?" "No." "I'm an old colleague of his." "Natasha Scott." "Know where I might find him?" "Well, we were just up in his office, so, um, I'm guessing on his way to surgery by now." "What were you doing in his office?" "Oh, I'm sorry?" "Erythema." "You're blushing." "I'm, uh..." "You know what?" "I will take that checkup after all." "I mean, it's been so long since I've been to my own doctor." "Who has the time?" "Being paged to assist in the O.R." "Lucky you." "You don't have to take your shirt off." "No, of course not." "All our brains are unique, but somehow, Charlie's... it's more unique." "Thank you, Shahir." "I think." "And there it is." "Okay." "Penfield #4." "Let's take a look at the medial site." "Yes, let's do that, shall we?" "Forceps." "Damn it." "Dr. Hamza?" "It's connected to the transverse and sagittal sinuses." "And what does that mean?" "It means it's far more aggressive than it presented in the imaging." "It means it's far more aggressive than it presented in the imaging." "Right." "This tumor isn't benign." "So you're saying it's cancer?" "Page Dr. Reid right now." "And this is how it happens." "In an instant, everything you think you know changes." "The ground shifts, then gives way, and suddenly you're falling, hoping to God there's someone there to catch you." "There weren't supposed to be any surprises." "I know." "But based on the size of the tumor and how aggressively it's invading the sinuses..." "You think it's cancer." "I've sent a sample up to pathology." "Shahir." "Yes." "Yes." "I think there's a very good chance the tumor could be malignant." "So cut it out." "I wish it were that simple." "It is, actually." "You're a neurosurgeon." "Alex..." "Alex, if I cut any closer, it could cause massive bleeding." "So what are the options?" "We dissect around the lateral and superior margins." "And leave the tumor in him." "Make a go for radiation." "It'll slow down the growth, buy him more time." "How long?" "A year." "Maybe more." "But there is a way to get it all." "Yes, but he could suffer a major bleed." "The chance of losing him on the table, Alex, it's..." "What do... what do we do?" "This is your call." "I'm gonna need some time." "Well, I can keep him stable, but every minute he's on the table..." "I know the risks, Shahir." "20 minutes tops." "But after that, I'll need a decision." "Okay." "You'll have one." "Charlie." "Alex." "I don't know what to do." "I've helped a lot of people in these halls... kids, nuns, even con men... guided them all to the other side." "But what's over there," "I have no intention of finding out." "♪The way you pull my hair♪" "Apparently our little Romeo is quite the youtube sensation." "He has almost half a million views." "Kid does have a great voice." "Yep, and he's as cute as a button." "They usually are." "Hello, Deshawn." "I'm Dr. Bell." "We managed to get your seizure under control with the lorazepam." "I'm going to give you an ultrasound, so I'm gonna need you to lift your shirt." "I am a heart specialist." "Me too." "I'm sure you're aware of the small army of girls that's out there waiting for you." "Ah, you sound like my mom." "She says all the attention will make my head big." "Speaking of your mom..." "What did she say when you told her I was here?" "Well, she's obviously concerned, and she's jumping on the first plane out." "Great." "So..." "If whatever this is doesn't kill me well, she's going to." "Okay, this might be a little bit cold." "So, I take it your mom's not too impressed with your music?" "That's an understatement." "She's never even seen me perform." "Mm-hmm." "What's going on?" "Okay, well, I think I know why you collapsed." "You have a hole in your heart." "A hole?" "Can... can you fix it?" "Absolutely." "What about the showcase?" "I can still perform tomorrow, right?" "Fixing this is more important right now, and I'm sure that your mom will agree when she gets here." "Oh, man, this sucks." "It does." "Dr. Lin, book an O.R." "Oh, Dr. Bell." "Couldn't we just put him on clopidogrel or warfarin?" "At least then he could perform tomorrow night." "No." "The risks are too considerable." "We need to operate." "Sometimes we don't get what we want, Dr. Lin." "No matter how much it hurts." "Alex." "I heard." "I'm trying to find case studies with a tumor in a similar position." "How's it going?" "Not good." "I can't..." "It's okay." "It's okay." "No, it's not." "I..." "I have an impossible decision to make." "I know." "And usually when I have an impossible decision, the first person that I talk to about it..." "Is Charlie." "Well, you've known him a long time." "What do you think he'd want me to do?" "I think, when it comes to Charlie, you always know what to do." "When he was in his coma, I could always feel him here." "And as long as I could feel him here," "I knew that we had to keep fighting to bring him back." "And now?" "I can feel him." "Does that make me sound crazy?" "No." "Just in love." "If I make the wrong decision, I could kill him." "What should I do?" "He's your go-to guy." "I say talk to him." "Thank you." " Ischemic bowel." " In all its glory." "Now, you see how the mesentery's on tension there?" "Yeah." "I can see the vessels clearly." "Great." "So what do I do next?" "Select avascular areas." " How many?" " Two." "And then?" "Safely go through the mesentery and clamp the vessels." "That's right." "Then we are in business." "Certainly are." "Natasha?" "What the hell are you...?" "We need to talk, Jeremy." "Uh, I am currently resecting a bowel right now." "Everyone, this is Dr. Scott." "She is a vascular surgeon visiting us all the way from sunny California." "How'd you get in here?" "It was surprisingly easy, actually." "I just lifted a pair of scrubs off a medical cart and flashed my lanyard." "Doesn't your lanyard say "L.A. General"?" "Well, that's the funny thing about lanyards..." "No one looks past the lamination." "How'd you know where to find me?" "Mm, the zygote you're sleeping with pointed me in the right direction." "What is she, 20?" " You jealous?" " That she can get into wonderland half-price?" " Absolutely." " Cautery." "I miss you." "This really isn't the time, Natasha." "When is the time?" "You won't answer my calls." "You left me." "You remember that, right?" "Yes." "And that's why, if I have to chase you halfway across the continent," "I will." "I still love you." "And I want you to come home." "I'm pretty sure I should apologize for something, but I don't know what it is, so..." "So you bought me a stuffed bear." "What am I, like a 9-year-old kid?" "No." "This is for Deshawn." "You know, I never really got the appeal of singer/songwriters." "I mean, big deal, so you can strum a guitar and make some words rhyme." "I mean, I pulled a doll's head out of a man's rectum yesterday." "Dawn." "Come on." "Seriously, what did I do?" "You tell me, Zach." "Look, I think you should know that I'm moving." "I know it's crazy, but I think I'm heading to Vancouver." "When are you leaving?" "My ex wants me to go check on a private school with her this weekend." "I booked an interview with our lady Grace while I'm out there." "Well, if you want a referral," "I know I'm not your boss but I'm happy to write you one." "Good." "Unless there's a reason why you think I should stay." "I got to go." "Deshawn's prepped." "I need to talk to you." "I'm here." "So, I have this decision to make." "I know, sweetheart." "Talk to me, Charlie." "Tell me what you want." "I want to grow old with you, Alex." "That's what I want." "Take it all out." "Can you give me a sign?" "Let me know that I'm doing the right thing." "Shahir!" "Alex, it's been 33 minutes." " I needed to be sure." " I said 20 minutes tops." "His pressure is dropping." "I need your decision right now." "I don't want a few months." "I need him for the long haul." "So does Luke." "Okay, what are you saying?" "I'm saying make the cut." "Alex, are you sure?" "Make the cut, Shahir." "Dr. Bishop, do you have a second?" "Hey, I'm just on my way to another case, Sekara." " I'm kind of busy." " It'll just take a second." "That second is quickly expiring." "Cassie's amazing." "She's thoughtful, crazy smart, unbelievably sexy." "Don't screw it up." "Excuse me?" "I know guys like you." "How you breeze in, you take whatever you need, and then you ditch out as soon as a better offer comes along." "That's a very uncomplicated view of things." "Wh... what are you doing?" "Waiting for you to hit me." "I'm not gonna hit you." "I'm actually kind of impressed." "You really care about her, don't you?" "Question is... do you?" "You really shouldn't be here." "It was Charlie's request in his chart." "If things went sideways, he wanted me to be here." "Well, it's highly unorthodox." "Welcome to my world." "Are you close?" "You can't rush this." "You're around the margins." "You've got it, Shahir." "I need to focus." "Okay, here we go." "Ah, the transverse sinus." " Did you nick it?" " I don't know yet." "Hemostatic mesh, foam, patties!" "All of it." "Alex, you can't operate on him!" "Foam, now!" "It's unethical for you to be even in here." "Right now, I'm just another set of hands." "Please." "Okay." "All right." "Give me patties." "We're going to need some more blood." "And call a code." "You're my compass, Alex." " My north star." " It's still obstructed." "I'll find my way back to you." "We have to move." "Please make it stop, please make it stop, please make it stop, please make it stop, please make it stop, please make it stop, please make it stop." "Please, please..." "You're gonna be okay." "Code omega, O.R. Code omega, O.R." "We need to control the CO2 concentrations." " Hyperventilating." " On it." "We need to be packing." "If we don't clip the source of the bleeding, no amount of packing is gonna stop it." "Bag him." "I still can't see anything." "What's happening to me?" "♪ every morning, every evening ♪" "♪ ain't we got fun?" "♪" "♪ not much money, oh, but honey ♪" "Hey!" "I'm not dead!" "Alex!" "How is he, Wayne?" "BP's still dropping." "He's tachy." " We're losing him." " No, we are not." "Hang more volume and clotting factors." "Hang some blood." "Charlie, come on." "Stay with me here." "There's too much blood." "I am flying blind." "I got it, I got it." "Okay." "Hand me a clip right now." "Suction." "BP's still dropping." " Dr. Hamza..." " I know." "Charlie, stay with me." "And this is what it feels like... to die." "Easy." "We don't want his brain to swell." "Give it to me." "Hand it over." "Death chill." "The cells in our bodies burst." "Our temperature drops." "But it's not cold in here." "How come I'm not cold?" "Remember the time we went to the beach and I wouldn't go in the water?" "Why wouldn't I go in the water?" "I'm ready now." "I'm ready, Alex." "Okay." "His bleeding's under control." "No, no, no, no, no." "BP's stable." "How long was his cortex without oxygen?" "Just for a few seconds." "Something's still wrong." "Shahir, I can't feel him." "Alex, please." "I can't..." "I can't feel him!" "You don't understand." "He's not here anymore." "He's stable." "You must have missed something." "We're monitoring him." "You have to stop." "No." "Shahir, don't close, all right?" "There's something you missed." "You have to go back." "Alex!" "This is my O.R." "I'm gonna have to ask you to leave." "Deshawn, we were able to fix your heart by pushing a small tube up through your leg." "It's sore." "It will be for a little while." "But the good news is, is that... here, and I will show it to you... we were able to plug the hole using these small little discs." "Pssh, no way." "Oh, sweet." "Thanks." "Now the blood will flow where it's supposed to." "Anyway, like I said, you should have a little bit of discomfort, but nothing to worry about." "Your heart is in great shape." "Have you heard from my mom?" "Uh, her plane just landed, and she should be here any minute." "I'll go put on my body armor." "I'm sure it's not gonna be that bad." "Yes, it will." "My dad played trumpet." "Jazz." "He, uh..." "He O.D.'d in some crappy club in the north end." "I'm sorry, Deshawn." "She blames the music." "So, me singing... she doesn't want me to get hurt." "Or worse." "What do you think?" "I don't think it's true." "I'm not him." "Have you told her that?" "No." "No, I can't." "Every time I try to tell her, the words get caught in my throat." "Except for when you sing." "Well, yeah." "Music lets you say things you can't normally say." "Th-the problem is that she never comes to see me play." "Play something for me." "Pretend I'm her." "Come on." "♪ Dr. Bell with the long golden hair ♪" "♪ you saved my heart by fixing its tear ♪" "I got one." "♪ secret heart ♪" "♪ what are you made of?" "♪" "♪ what are you so afraid of?" "♪" "You're right, Deshawn." "Letting your guard down, being vulnerable, that's terrifying." "For everyone." "You need to talk to your mom." "I guarantee you that she wants to hear what's in your heart." "Okay, ladies." "Let's turn it around." "He needs his rest, okay?" "Uh, Dr. Bell?" "This might be out of line, but is everything okay?" "What do you mean?" "I know I let you down earlier with the pitch, and maybe it's just that, but I'm sensing a little weirdness." "Come here, Maggie." "Uh, it's not the pitch." "This is not very professional, and I pride myself on professionalism." "I don't know if you know this, but Zach and I have been seeing each other." "And..." "I saw the two of you kiss." "Oh, my God." "Um..." " No, it's fine." " No, no, no, no." "I mean, I'm over it." "It's good." " Not what you think." " No, it's not?" "'Cause you guys were kissing." "It looked like you were kissing." "No, I kissed him." "Uh..." "I had a really bad patient outcome." "I was very nervous about the pitch." "He told me about you." "He did?" "Yeah." "He really likes you." "It was actually very sweet... as he was rejecting me." "Thank you, Maggie." "We're good." "We're great." "All's good." "Okay, I got to go." "♪ secret heart ♪" "♪ what are you made of?" "♪" "♪ what are you so afraid of?" "♪" "♪ could it be ♪" "♪ three simple words ♪" "♪ or the fear of being overheard ♪" "You got it all." "Tumor's gone." "It's gone." "I know I freaked out in there." "I just..." "I, uh..." "I can't shake this feeling." "I'm sorry I kicked you out." "We all love him, Alex." "He's gonna be fine." "Jackson!" "have you seen Dr. Miller?" "I think he's gone home." "Said something about going to Vancouver for the weekend." "Dr. Bell, are you okay?" "♪ it's the very same one ♪" "♪ you're dying ♪" "♪ to reveal ♪" "♪ now tell her how you feel ♪" "♪ secret heart ♪" "♪ come out and share it ♪" "I'm an idiot." "Yeah, you are." "I mean, I know I'm not supposed to say that 'cause you're a girl." "I saw you and Maggie kiss." "Remember when I just called you an idiot?" "I'd like to take that back." "Dawn... it didn't mean anything." "I know." "Maggie told me, and I think that I already..." "I just... oh, Zach, I'm such a mess." "Join the club." "Stay here." "Stay at Hope Zion." "I want you." "And every spare minute that we have, we will go and see your kids." "And... and I have a lot of air miles saved up." "My kids are animals." "Do you have any idea what chocolate would do to your white couch?" "Well, it'll beat another lonely TV dinner." "You're not lonely." "I'm not." "Not anymore." "Hey." "You mind, pal?" "I'm sorry." "Sweetheart." "Ohh!" "Are you okay?" "Define okay." "You know, um, a wise woman once told me, if you run into a wall, kick it down." " Did I say that?" " Yep." "And I've called on it on more than one occasion during treatment." "Well, we're glad to have you back." "Yeah." "I'm happy to be back." "I just wish they'd clear me for work already." "So..." "All in good time." "Yeah." "Patience has never been my strong suit." "You know that." "But I prefer doing something to, um... to sitting on my ass." "Why can't I feel him here, Dana?" "What does Shahir say?" "That they got the tumor en bloc." "That he's stable." "So why do I still have this feeling?" "Because you're exhausted." "All those days by his bedside..." "I didn't feel like this." "How do you feel?" "Can you tell me?" "Cold." "Like somehow we've used up all our luck." "No." "Ohh." "No." "Code blue to I.C.U. 34B." "Code blue to I.C.U. 34B." "No, no, no." "Where does it all lead, and what will become of us?" "I can't get a pulse!" " I'm taking over!" " He must have thrown a clot." "Switch in three, two, one, switch!" "Okay, push more fluids and bicarbs." " On it." " Come on, try to hang on!" "Charge to 360." "Alex, I need you to get off him." "Okay." "All clear." " Got it?" " Yep." "It all leads to you." "Nothing." "He's still in V-fib." "Go again!" "And we will become ourselves." "Charlie..." "Okay." "All clear." "Charlie, come back to me." "Charlie..." "One more time." "All clear." "Alex, all clear." "Alex, please!" "Keep going!" "Okay, let's shock him again." "Whatever you are, if you're out there and you can hear me..." "I get it now." "My dad, Luke, Charlie..." "It's me." "I'm cursed." "But Charlie is good." "He is good, and he needs to be okay." "Please let him live." "I'll..." "I-I will stay away from him, I swear." "Just please..." "Please, please, please let him live." "Dr. Reid?" "He's got a pulse." "A near-perfect surgery, three months of rehab, and now back to the land of the living." "Damn it." "No tumor." "You okay?" "No more ghosts." "Yeah." "I'm just nervous." "I went through the fire." "I was cleansed and found worthy." "And this-this is heaven." "yeah, you've been, um, kind of on edge lately." "Well, you know I hate public speaking." "Why don't you try the, um, picturing-everybody-naked thing?" "That's not gonna work." "I'm a doctor." "I'll start wanting to examine them all or something." "Well, you are gonna be great, because... because you're brilliant and you're gorgeous." "Go on." "And... and I kind of owe you, well, a couple, I think, since you've brought me back to life." "You do." "Twice now, right?" "Mm-hmm." "Nothing bad is gonna happen because I've got your back." "Yeah." "You killed your wife." "Same as you murdered that little girl." "You have no idea who you're messing with." "You're gonna rot in that prison cell, Tom." "You said you'd help me." "I'm not gonna forget this, Charlie." "Hey, there." "Can you tell me if doctor..." "Harris is on shift tonight?" "No, he's not scheduled." "Can I help you with something?" "No, I just wanted to talk to him." "What about his wife?" "Uh..." "Dr. Reid?" "Is she here tonight?" "Sorry, she's not here, either." "Okay." "Right." "Thanks." "They're probably at the fellowship awards." "Half the staff's there." "Thanks." "I can't believe we are at a work thing for Valentine's day." "Well, I guess our one true love is medicine." "Oh, yes." "Happy Valentine's." "Happy Valentine's day." "All right, next one's on me." "Three more whiskeys and an appletini." "What?" "Yeah, he drinks appletinis." "What?" "They're good." "I'm gonna sit this one out, guys." "I don't want to slur my acceptance speech." "Come on, Maggs." "We'll be like Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis." "Twist my arm." "Mmm." "To the dynamic duo." "Hey." "So, whose idea was it to combine your fellowship pitches?" "We've always brought out the best in each other." "Speaking of which, let's go run our words, shall we?" "Yes." "Congratulations." "Thank you." "You too." "Hey, let's paper-rock-scissors to see who has to talk first." "Okay." "Oh, you win." " Lin!" " Hey!" "Reid." "You guys, congratulations!" " You look beautiful." " Thank you." " So great to see you here." " You kidding me?" "Grabbed the last flight from vancouver." "Wouldn't have missed it for the world." "Can I buy you a drink?" "Actually, we are going to need a few drinks." "Congratulations, ladies." "Thank you." "You look, uh... athletic." "Jacob really wanted to see us off, and..." "Yeah, despite his penchant for car sickness." "My manolos didn't stand a chance." "Yeah." "Speaking of which, I should go see if they're dry." "And we have to go rehearse our drunken speech." "Yes, we do." "Good luck." "See you at the bar." "Okay." "Check one, two." "Check one, two." "Red leather, yellow leather." "The tip of the tongue, the teeth, the lips." "Let us eat lettuce leaves." "Okay, let's go." "Your glass slipper." "I am sorry that my son puked on your shoes." "Are you kidding me?" "That's what family is about." "Lucky for me, his dad is a prince." "Aww, come here." "I'm just gonna have a quick word with her." "Hey." "Hey." "You look nice." "Thank you." "So does she." "Well, she does." "Well, no more silent treatment." "I guess you could call that progress." "Yeah, well, you are moving back to L.A." "In the morning, right?" "Yeah." "This might be our last chance to talk." "About what?" "Cassie." "No, seriously." "What is there to talk about?" "Will you at least give me a chance to explain a few things?" " I told you I was married." " You did." "You also told me you were getting divorced." "I didn't realize how much I still loved her." "Till she showed up." "What do you want from me, Jeremy?" "I don't know." "I guess before I go I just want to make sure you're okay." "No, you just don't want me to be mad at you." "Look, I'm sorry." "For what?" "You're an amazing woman." "I don't need a pep talk." " You're leaving?" " Yeah." "Turns out I'm not really in a party mood." "Cassie." "See you around, doctor." "Thank you." "Tonight, we honor two of our own." "Our best and brightest." "Our co-winners combined studies in breast and gynecological cancer to propose a revolution in the treatment of women's health, an issue that has personal resonance for so many of us here at Hope Zion, and none more than Dana Kinney." "Dana." "You know, so often in medicine, our job is to be reactive." "You know, to clean up life's messy mistakes." "And it's in those moments that we test our mettle." "How we measure up with life hanging in the balance, it defines us as doctors." "But every now and then, something comes along that changes the game." "And with this new innovation, we won't have to wait any more." "We can bring the fight." "We can be proactive." "I've watched these women develop." "I've seen them make mistakes." "I've seen them break the rules." "And, yes, it's true, we've had our, um... we've had our share of disagreements." "But they pale in comparison to our triumphs." "These women, they give us hope." "They've shown us that with hard work and sheer damn determination that the world will open up." "And not just to those who strive for greatness, but for those who demand it." "For those who hold themselves up to a standard that, well, if you ask me, is pretty much impossible to meet." "But, um..." "Here they are." "Two surgeons united in a new fight with a plan that will change lives and the wherewithal to see it through." "So I stand up here, honored and amazed, to call up two of my closest friends, doctors Maggie Lin and Alex Reid." "Oh, I'm so proud of you!" "Charlie?" "You need to go." "Hey." "You broke your promise." "It's time to pay up."