"Okay, ready?" "Let's try one more time." "Ready?" "You can do it." "There you go." "One, two, three." "Ooh!" "Yeah, why walk when standing there smiling is so much fun?" "Alex, we got to go." "No, no, no, he's almost there." "We can't leave yet." " We don't have a choice." " One more time." "One more time." " No, I think we... what?" "What?" " We've got to go." "We've got to go." "We've got to go, got to go." " Ready?" "Go!" "Let's go." " Aah!" "Well, okay." "Wait." "Don't walk until mommy comes home." " Back... back up, back up." " What?" "What?" "We got to go." "'Cause I didn't get to kiss him goodbye." "I love you." "Mwah!" " I miss you already." " Okay, bye, buddy." " Mwah." " Bye-bye." "Okay." "Put some slippery socks on him till Alex gets home." "And jacket and, uh..." "Oh, and my file." "There we go." "All right, let's go." " Okay." "Bye, baby." " Good all right, let's go." " Bye!" " Bye." " Call me if anything happens." " Okay." "Dead eye, please." " May I ask?" " Hmm?" "What exactly is a dead eye?" "Well, it's coffee with three shots of espresso." "Seems a bit excessive." "Well, the first two are standard." "The third is to help me" " with the mountain of paperwork ahead of me." " Ah." "Took me six months to get my affairs in order" " when I first transferred here." " Any advice?" "Think of the salary awaiting you in Cleveland." " Did I hear someone say Cleveland?" " Alex." "You seem in remarkably good spirits, considering we're about to lose Dr. Lin to the midwest." "I'm not losing you..." "Because I am going to visit you as much as I can." " You are?" " Of course." "Look at everything your city has to offer." "You've got the rock and roll hall of fame, the world's largest rubber stamp." "And if we feel like a road trip, which I'm sure we will," " a giant building shaped like a basket." " Mm-hmm." "No, but seriously, you are embarking on an exciting, new, well-paid chapter of your life, and I am gonna be there for you." "Thank you." "Everyone knows long distance doesn't work." " Who's this guy?" " Oh." "Dr. Bell?" " Yep." " Great." "Okay, Lucille Ball once said," ""if you want something done, ask a busy person to do it."" "Apparently, she was wrong." "The deadline for the fellowship award application is today at 5:00." "I don't care how busy you are." "Get it in." "This is a career-defining award with a substantial cash prize." "There." "Now you all have one, in case you have misplaced yours." "I will see you all at the donor dinner this evening." "Now go." "Heal." "And beware the barrenness of a busy life." "Socrates said that." "You're very inspirational today." "Daily quote calendar." "It was a gift." "From someone who doesn't know you very well." "I was just wondering why you paged me when I'm leaving." "I need you to give a guided tour to the junior residents." "They keep getting lost on rounds." "I have so much to do before I leave for Ohio." "Until then, you work for me." "I believe the children are our future." "That's quite a calendar." "Actually, that one was all Whitney." "Funny." "Thought your application would be in already." "And I thought you were only staying here for a year." "I am, but with something like this up for grabs, it would be ludicrous not to throw my hat in the ring." " Right." " Do you want to throw your hat in early?" "I have to give the junior residents a tour" " of the hospital, and I..." " Uh, sorry." "I think that was my phone." " I didn't hear anything." " I did." "You know, a year ago, I would have had this application filled out in a second." "Well, now you have other priorities." "Like Luke walking." "He's gonna walk today, Maggs." "I can feel it." "And I have to get through this day as soon as possible so I don't miss it." "Do you need an extra set of hands?" "Or two?" "Ha ha." "Don't try to pawn that fresh meat off on me." "It was worth a shot." "Welcome to Hope Zion." "I'm Dr. Lin." "I am a surgical fellow and apparently your tour guide." "Hi." "I'm Cassie." "Or Dr. Williams." "It's up to you." "Obviously." "And I'm Asha." "After the tour, will we be scrubbing in to assist on any surgeries?" "If you want surgical privileges, you'll have to earn them." "Anything else?" "No." "No." "I'm good." "Good." "Dr. Miller, how was your evening?" "That accent... you're sticking with that, huh?" "I'm not really sure how to answer that." "Well, it doesn't really matter because I've forgotten what we were talking about." "We've got a possible O.D. on the way." "Ambulance is a couple minutes out." "Yay." "Best part of my job... saving patients who don't want to live." "Yeah, man." "You need to lighten up." "Do I seem heavy to you?" "I guess it has been a few days since I've had any fun." "This is the E.R." "Ask, and you shall receive." "Hi." "Come on." "Welcome." "You sleeping with Lin or something?" "Is everything about sex with you?" "No." "Sometimes after sex, it's about food." "Female, mid-20s." "She's bradycardic." "B.P. is 80 over 50." "I still have to pack." "Hey." "Hi." "What's your name?" "Ava." "I'm just gonna check your lungs now, Ava." "She's flushed." "Could be an ibuprofen O.D." "Oh, yeah." "Aah!" "Don't touch my face!" "This is the O.R. reception, named for obvious reasons." "I have to take this." "Wait here." "Last stop on the tour... the lounge, where you can all have a juice box and use the bathroom." "So, um, I need to borrow a dummy." "They're on a hospital tour with Lin." "Sorry. what are you asking me?" "I'm doing a talk on the trauma caused by CPR, so I need a-a visual aid." "Okay. check the lab and take whatever you need." "I need your help." " I don't miss your job." " Mm." "What do you need?" "Okay." "I'm seeing this lovely gentleman." "He's tall." "He's handsome." "He calls his mother once a week." "He volunteers at the humane society." " He's perfect." " But?" "I had a cardiac event in bed." " What do you mean?" " Sex, Dr. Bell." " We were having sex." " Yes." "I got that part." "I can't take any chances after my heart attack, and-and-and you shouldn't, either." "You know, I'm your top neurosurgeon." "Okay, yes." "Sure." "I'm happy to help." "We will wire you to the holter monitor, and we will go over the readout together before the donor dinner." "You seem different." "Are you on medication?" "Charlie, you mind putting that away just while I'm in here?" "Yeah." "Sorry." "Uh, I need you to, uh, walk me through the night that Amy died." "I know this is hard for you, but, uh, I kind of need to hear it from you and not from a police report." "Yeah." "Um..." "Amy asked me to draw her a bath before I went out for my run." "I came home an hour later." "I went to shower, and she was she was in the water." "I tried to pull her up, but my hands kept slipping." "Yeah." "Um... the prosecutor said that the, uh... the bruises on Amy prove that you, uh, held her down and drowned her." "I tried to grab any part of her I could to get her out of the water." "Okay." "What happened after you got her out of the water?" "I put her down onto the floor." "I started CPR." "Her body was still warm, so I knew I had a chance." "And how long did you do CPR for?" "Two, three minutes." "And then I stopped to call 911." "Um... but at that point, it was too late." "I put a towel over her body before the medics showed up, just, you know..." "Uh, the, uh... the coroner found a fracture in the back of Amy's skull." "Yeah, from when I put her down onto the floor." "Okay, well, how were you, uh... how were you holding her when you pulled her out of the tub?" "I had my arms wrapped around her chest." "What, like, um..." "Like that?" "Yeah, just-just like that." "You're sure about that?" "Well, I wasn't thinking about her head when I put her down." "I just wanted to start CPR as fast as I could." "Can you tell me how long you've had the pain?" "Just what every patient likes to see... their doctor in a rush." "You know what?" "You're right." "Let's do this again." "Mr.-Mr. Lively." "Hello." "I'm Dr. Reid." "Hi." "Call me Ralph." "Okay, Ralph." "What's up?" "My cancer's back." "Well, three years ago, you had curative surgery for colon cancer." "I can't go through this again." "Well, it might not be cancer." "I'll have to run some tests to be sure." "Excuse me." "Can you take Mr. Lively up to imaging?" "And this is emergent, so if you can bump him to the front of the line," " that would be great." " You got it, Dr. Reid." "See?" "There are some perks to having a doctor that's in a hurry." "No!" "Is someone using the microwave?" "What did I say when we toured the lounge?" "The fridge is not for urine samples?" " What else?" " The microwave messes with the wi-fi." "That's right, Dr. Sekara." "So no more microwaving until I'm in Cleveland, okay?" "Got your text." "What's up?" "We each have to take a rookie for the day." " What?" " Dawn's orders." "Fine." "But I get the best one, someone low-maintenance." "Good luck with that." "Okay, pop quiz." "Hurry up." "Let's go." "What is the primary indicator of reoccurring colorectal cancer?" "Uh, serial carcinoembryonic antigen in, uh, asymptomatic patients." "Great, but I didn't say my patient was asymptomatic." "Anybody else?" "Iron-deficiency anemia?" "Not bad." "What about you, Dr...?" "Williams." "Um, it depends on the size and location and if anastomosis is affected." "How would you like to assist in an abdominal exploration?" "Me?" "Oh, yes." "Um, yeah." "But Dev's answer was also correct." "Not as correct." "Let's go." "Hurry up." "Dr. Hamza." "Uh, uh, I apologize." "No." "It's okay." "I've been working out." "Are you all right?" "It's too soon to tell." "What can I help you with, Dr. Curtis?" "There's someone I'd like you to meet." "Okay." "Ava?" "This is Dr. Hamza." "If she overdosed, she shouldn't be on morphine." "It's a light dosage on a slow drip." "I did a full liver and blood work-up." "There's no permanent damage." "I didn't mean to take so many pills." "Ava's been suffering from acute facial pain." "Anytime she or anyone else touches her face..." "The pain is unbearable." "How bad is it, on a scale of 1 to 10?" "A 17." "Your brain C.T. will tell us everything we need to know to diagnose the issue, whatever that may be." "I'm supposed to be on a flight to Paris tomorrow." "Well, yeah, you might want to reschedule." "It may take us awhile to diagnose the issue." "Ava, the brain is a wonderful and mysterious organ." "Sorry." "I'm just frustrated." "I've been planning Paris for months." "What's the occasion?" "It's my boyfriend, Xavier." "I'm moving out there to be with him." "You may want to reconsider." "If you think you're in pain now, wait until the relationship ends." "He's, uh, obviously joking." "Angelo Marro." "That's me." "I got a little banged up on the job." "Okay, let's take a look at what we got." "Whoa, whoa." "Just give me a cortisone shot, and I'll be on my way." "Okay, well, I can't give you a cortisone shot until I take a look at what's going on." "I've never missed a day of work in my life." "I'm not gonna start now." "Okay." "Where do you work?" "You're looking at it." "Been a custodian in Hope Zion for 10 years." "Yeah, of course." "Hey." "You don't need to pretend you recognize me." "Look... you're one of our own, so all the more reason to be thorough, right?" "All right." "Okay." "Okay." "Whoa." "It looks way worse than it is." "Uh... okay." "Someone page Dr. Harris." "Will we be going in laparoscopically," " or are we gonna open him up?" " I haven't decided yet." "Oh, and by the way, don't ever do that again." " Do what?" " Try to give away a surgery." "I don't care if they're your friends." "Oh, Dev's not my friend, per se." "I mean, we share study notes and occasionally a futon, but..." "Dr. Williams, you're my junior resident, not my buddy, and if you make my workday any longer than it needs to be, you're gonna be sorry I picked you." "Got it?" "So, there definitely is a blockage in your belly." "We're just waiting for the lab to give us a blood and liver work-up to just help us narrow down the possible causes." "Whatever you need to do to help me." "Do you want us to call your family?" "No." "I don't want to worry them until we figure this out." "I'm sorry." "Who are you?" "This is Dr. Williams, my resident." " She'll be assisting me." " Her?" "No offense, but you look like a girl guide." "She's a junior resident." "And this is a teaching hospital." "Okay, but no mistakes, no missteps." "Can only cheat death so many ..." "Ralph, what's going on?" " It hurts!" " When you're breathing in?" "Pain in the right upper quadrant increases when breathing." "Gallstones." " Ohh!" " Okay, he's febrile, tachycardic." "Could be a gallbladder rupture." "I need 10cc of ketorolac." "I don't know where that is." "The nurse's station." "Hurry up." "Ralph, you're gonna be okay, all right?" " Okay." " Just try to breathe." "You're gonna be okay." " Sure." " Mr. Marro." "It appears as though you have mulched your elbow." " As you can see, the joint is in pieces." " Oh, no." "Looks like a map of the Philippines." "There's Manila down there." "I was "jeopardy!" champion of my living room." "Um, can you move your fingers for me?" "Peripheral nerve is good." "You are neurovascularly intact." "Great." "Slap a cast on it and send me on my way." "Uh, yeah, a cast won't work." "There's too many bone fragments." "We're talking about a total elbow replacement." "An implant?" "How long will I be off for?" "Four to six weeks." "I can't be off work that long." " File for disability." " Yeah, right." "And navigate that kafkaesque nightmare." " Kafka?" " Yeah." "I read." "Angelo, if you... if you carry on with your current occupation, a new elbow's not gonna last you two years." "And it's gonna be worse off than before." "We're talking about immobility, scar tissue, nerve damage." "Cut to the chase." "You need to start thinking about getting another job." "What are you... a surgeon or a guidance counselor?" "Come on, guys." "There's got to be another option." "Well, normally I would repair it using plates and screws..." "Fine." "Do that." "If it doesn't work, we can talk about me quitting my job." "Uh, actually, we need to talk about that right now." "I need your permission for both options..." "In case I open up your arm, and depending on what I find..." "All right." "Get me the consent form." "Bring it here, and I'll sign it." "Okay." "Guys's got no intention of quitting." "Ah, well, he better hope I can fix it." "Yep?" "What are you doing?" "Oh, uh, just a little visualization." "Dr. Reid, thank you for the opportunity to observe your cholecystectomy." "You're not observing." "You're assisting." "As long as you're in there, you're gonna be working." "Oh, great." "That's great." "Sink or swim, Dr. Williams." "Hey." "Um..." "Just promise me you won't overreact 'cause this is actually really good news." " What is?" " The nanny called, and Luke took his first steps." "Really?" "Oh, my god." "Oh, wow." "Look at him." "Oh, he's just so great." "I know." "I can't believe I missed this." "I know." "I'm sorry." "No, I..." "I'm s..." "I'm scrubbed." "Al." "It's fine." "I have to work." " Dr. Reid, are you okay?" " Knife." "Have you been crying?" "Dr. Williams, if you want to remain in this O.R.," "You will limit your conversations to the work." "Prepare to suction." "Yes." "Of course." "Is everything okay?" "I'm trying to rebook my flight to Paris, and the only seats left are way out of my price range." "You don't think this is all a sign, do you?" "Like maybe I shouldn't be uprooting my life like this?" "Well, it's a risk, of course." "But a leap of faith for love..." "What could be more exhilarating than that?" "Trigeminal neuralgia." " I'm sorry?" " It's what you have." "It's a chronic pain condition that affects this nerve." "It's the nerve that carries sensation from your face to your brain." "You may have a blood vessel constricting that nerve." " Can you fix it?" " Yes." "Through anticonvulsants and antispasmodics, many patients feel some relief within a few months." "I don't want some relief." "I want the pain gone." "I want Xavier to be able to touch me without causing me pain." "Okay, well, there are surgical options." "Okay." "Tell me more about those." "Microvascular decompression." "Right. 90% of patients feel permanent and immediate relief." " However..." " Okay." "There are risks." "The most common complications with MVD are nerve damage..." "Which can lead to hearing loss, facial numbness, double vision... paralysis." "Paralysis?" "What w... what would you do?" "I'd probably postpone the move and try the drug therapy first." "Don't answer me as a doctor." "Answer me as the romantic you obviously are." "Dr. Hamza is the best neurosurgeon in the country." "But, look, this has to be your decision." "I'd like to have the surgery." "All right, then." "I'll book an O.R." "Dr. Miller!" "Think I can I get some more pain meds before my surgery?" "I'm really starting to feel this thing." "I'm not a nurse, but I'll send one." "You're kind of a prick." "You know that?" "Joel always said you were the fun guy around here." " You knew Joel?" " Sure." "The custodians had a weekly poker game in the basement." "Joel used to come by whenever he had time to kill." "Joel was terrible at poker." "Why do you think I kept inviting him?" "He was a good guy, though." "Always trying to get me to drop the mop and go back to school." "Oh, he was just trying to get rid of you" " so he could win his money back." " Sure." "He even bet me 100 bucks once I couldn't pass the lsats." " How'd you do?" " 166." "He still owes me the $100." "Well, good luck getting that back." "Look..." "If you're some kind of genius lawyer in the making, what are you doing pushing a mop here at Hope-Zee?" "Same thing you're doing... making a living." "Looks like my ride's here." "We'll see you 'round." "Take me through the next steps." "First we identify calot's triangle." "Then we ligate the cystic duct." "Sounds good." "Oh." "You want me to do it?" "Let's see what you can do." "Forceps and right angle." "Thank you." "Okay, he has a lot of adhesions from his cancer surgeries, so be sure of the anatomy before you cut." "Do you have a good visual?" "Yes." "Okay." "It's tied off." "Next I'll be tying off the cystic artery, then mobilizing the gallbladder off the bed." "We have a general surgeon in the making." "Oh, crap." "What's wrong?" "Okay." "Assess." "Cassie, did you cut the common bile duct?" "Incise the visceral peritoneum overlying of the gallbladder fundus." "Cassie, snap out of it." "You got to do something here." "Grasp the dome of the gallbladder with a kelly clamp and elevate it superiorly." "Cassie, you got to back away so I can get in there." "Cassie, move." "Cassie, move." " Out." " Okay, 4-0 chromic suture." "Retract, please." "Damn it, I need another set of hands in here!" "I'll page another resident." "No." "Wait." "Let me throw in a couple of sutures, and then, uh, give me a minute." "He's stabilizing." "Give me a towel, please." "Unbelievable." " Is he okay?" " He's stable." "Dr. Williams, what happened in there?" "I thought I was cutting through an adhesion, and the bile duct was underneath." "So you fix it with a stitch." " I know." " Then why didn't you?" "I-I just kept hearing his voice..." ""no missteps, no mistakes"... and I-I thought, "he beat cancer, and I'm gonna kill him."" "So you walk out on him instead?" "I knew that you had it under control." "It was your mistake." "You needed to fix it." "I was right there beside you the whole time." "I was supporting you." "No, that's not how it felt!" "Look, I-I know that I shouldn't care whether or not you have any confidence in my abilities, but I do because I'm actually terrified." "Which is why you tried to give the surgery to Dev." "Cassie, look at me." "Look at me." "Everybody's terrified the first time." "And that in there... a version of it has happened to all of us." "But giving up on a patient, giving up on a surgery..." "It's inexcusable." "You need to suck it up." "Get your ass back in there and finish what you started." "Hey." "How'd the elbow do?" "Uh, no matter how many plates or screws I put in, the joint wouldn't hold." " So you had to give him a new one." " Yeah." "The best thing we can do for Angelo is convince him to find another line of work." "Unfortunately, I know guys like him." "They're very stubborn." "Well, we're gonna see him in another couple years when he blows the new elbow out then." "Yeah, and his arm's so messed up, he can't even tie his own shoes." "Thanks." "Hell of a surgery, doc." "Um... you saw that?" "Best show in town..." "Until I figure how to sneak into a leafs game." "Oh, don't do that." "That's... that's not worth it." "Beats rooting for the oilers." "I still can't get over '88." "Right." "That's when they traded "the great one," isn't it?" "I was 7 years old." "Cried like a baby." "First time I realized how unfair life could be, that you could invest so much time into something and it could all disappear because of someone else's mistake." "Yeah." "Well, I need to go see my patient, so..." "See you in the morgue." "Scissors." "Your technique is exquisite." "Did Dr. Bell tell you that I'm on the jury for the fellowship award?" "She may have mentioned it." "You don't have to suck up to me, Dr. Curtis." "Your record speaks for itself." "Hmm." "The superior cerebellar artery seems to be the one causing all the fuss." "It's adhering to the trigeminal nerve." "The compression must be causing her pain." "Okay, I'd like to prepare the sponge." "You were top of your class at Oxford." "You interned at King's College, did your residency at St. George's, and a fellowship year at Royal Berkshire." "You've committed my record to memory." "I'm flattered." "Don't be." "I have an encyclopedic memory." "But there's a 18-month gap, Dr. Curtis, where you completely fell off the grid." "What happened?" "Dr. Hamza, um... this surgery is so complex." "I-I really feel like I need to focus if I'm gonna absorb it all." "Fair point." "Okay, I'm gonna insert the sponge in between the artery and the nerve." "Perfect fit." "Hmm." "Are you having a nice little moment there?" "Who knew having a bionic elbow would be so itchy?" "I see Dr. Harris already told you the bad news." "Yeah." "Said it was like a jigsaw puzzle in there, couldn't be fixed." "You win some, you lose some." "You need to find another job, Angelo." "Otherwise, you risk losing the use of that arm." "What do you care?" "I saw the way you looked at me when I came in here." "Now all of a sudden we're friends because I played a couple hands of poker with your buddy Joel?" "You know, your whole hard-done-by, working-class thing..." "Sorry? "Thing"?" " It's a thing?" " Yeah, w..." "What do you think, that there's some inherent nobility in being working class?" "Marx said so." "There you go." "I knew it." "You like trying to prove to me how smart you are, don't you?" "I got nothing to prove to anybody, especially a..." "A what?" "A what?" "A rich prick in a lab coat?" "My father worked at Algoma Steel for 35 years and died of lung cancer at 56, so don't tell me about the working man." "Algoma?" "You're from the soo." "I grew up there, yeah." "Me too." "Elliot Lake." "Mm." "I was the first one in my family to go to university." "Same here." "My dad and my brother worked at the foundry." "I got a humanities degree." "A lot of good that did me." "What do you think is gonna happen if you do something else, something more than they did?" "You tell me." "I'm telling you, you have to do something more... especially when it means losing that arm if you don't." "Problem solved." "All right." "I want you to close." "Okay." "Needle driver." "Take a breath." "Better." "You've got this." "How's our patient?" "Still out from the anesthetic." "Good." "The rest will do her good." "I need help drafting a response to this e-mail." ""Dear Shahir, I don't understand what happened last night."" ""Call me."" "Okay." "So, what's a gentler way of saying," ""we won't be seeing each other anymore."" ""I'm afraid for my life"?" "Are you having me on?" "No." "Mm-hmm?" "Something is wrong with Ava." "It started when she came out of sedation." "Dr. Hamza, I can't make it stop." "Unh." "My heart." "Y-you fixed it." "I-I just gave it something to do." "Ava, look at me." "Follow this light with your eyes, okay?" "Ava, are you in any pain?" "Um, barely." "Dr. Hamza, what's happening to me?" "Pupil response is normal." "Do you have any vision problems, Ava?" "Dizziness?" "Any changes to your coordination?" "Um..." "Memory loss?" "Fatigue?" "No, nothing." "Why?" "The trigeminal neuralgia..." "I think it was masking an underlying condition, and now other symptoms are surfacing." "W-what condition?" "Multiple sclerosis." "We'll have to run some more tests." "Even then, diagnosing M.S. is difficult." "You see, it's a diagnosis of exclusion, which means we have to rule out everything else first." "But... that's what you think I have?" "Yes." "I thought you should hear it from me and know that I will be informing the chief of surgery of my mistake." "Am I gonna have any weird side effects?" "You shouldn't." "Then why so glum?" "I'm down a gallbladder, and my bile duct... whatever that does... has a couple stitches in it." "I'm alive." "I'm still cancer-free." "It's a great day." "I'll check in on you again before I leave for the day." "That's good patient care, Dr. Williams." "I take it you're feeling better?" "Well, a little tender, but compared to before, it's a breeze." "You know, they say gallstones are the closest pain to childbirth." "I should get my wife some flowers." "So you have kids?" "Three." "All girls." "Loves of my life." "You seem less wired than before." "Um..." "Mr. Lively, I owe you an apology." "I was hoping to get home before my son took his first steps." "They happened without you?" "Listen, when I was first diagnosed with cancer," "I had to get used to the idea that I was gonna miss everything... birthdays, graduations, weddings..." "Hopefully in that order." "Those milestones... they're not the end of something." "They're just the beginning." "You'll see." "There are my girls." "Easy on the hugs." "He's still sore." "Hey, guys." "Great to see you." "Did you forget something, Dr. Williams?" "I, uh..." "I couldn't help but overhear... about your son." "I'm sorry." "Cost of doing the job, I guess." "I'll get over it..." "I hope." "So, are you dragging yourself to this event?" " Yeah." " Yeah, I-I'll see you there." " Sure." " Dr. Reid?" "Yeah?" "For what it's worth, you were there for my first steps..." "So thank you." "Hello?" "Yes." "Nice to hear from you." "How is that... how is that possible?" "Hey." "Just handing in my application." "If I can't win mother of the year," "I might as well win fellow of the year." "Maggs?" "What's up?" "There's no job for me in Cleveland." "Uh, the funding fell through." "God, I'm-I'm sorry." "Hey, listen." "Let's get you an application." "There's no time to fill it out now." "Well, we can photocopy mine." "We can fill in a few things." "It'll be great." " I just..." " It's too late." "At least I get to stay here with you, right?" "You should go." "Dr. Hamza, you look so handsome." "Social worker stop by?" "Yeah, I asked her for some reading material, but these are actually making me feel a lot worse." "Ava, M.S. is not a death sentence." "Many of those diagnosed still continue their everyday activities." "Yeah, I know." "It says that right here, along with, "2/3 of individuals with M.S."" ""will not suffer paralysis or a major disability."" "Precisely." "You can still live your life and go to Paris." "I'm not going to Paris." "All these hopeful words..." ""most patients," "2/3 of individuals."" "I mean, I can't help but feel that those are terrible odds to build a future on." "Don't make any rash decisions, Ava." "This is all very new for you." "Have you ever been in love, Dr. Hamza?" "Yes." "Once." "What happened?" "We had three wonderful years, and then it all fell apart." "Would you do it all over again..." "Knowing it might end badly?" "Yes." "Even for one good week." "Okay, if it's bad news, I'd rather just hear it outright." "You're fine, Shahir." "Your heart rate was elevated because you were under stress." "And even then, your heart rhythm was normal." "Look." " But last night in bed with Jonathan..." " Okay, what exactly was going on when you had this cardiac event?" "I suppose I could draw you a diagram." "No, I mean was there anything other than sex going on?" "He said, "I love you."" "And what did you say?" "I'm-I'm not feeling well." "Okay, sit." "Come." "Sit." "Have you seen anyone since Victor?" "No." "Maybe you are just a little out of practice." "You want my advice, as your cardiac surgeon?" "Tell Jonathan how you feel." "You are a gorgeous woman, Dr. Bell." "And it's about time a man..." "ideally a heterosexual man... got to appreciate that." "Thanks, Shahir." "Wow." "You look, uh..." "Maggie. what are you doing?" "I know I said I would give you my support, but I really don't want to go to this dinner." "If I have to go, so do you." "Put it on." "Thank you all for coming." " We are here tonight..." " Good to see you." "To celebrate the inauguration of a very prestigious award, an award that was made possible by the generous donation of Mrs. Iris Ackermann." "Thanks to Mrs. Ackermann," "Hope Zion will be rewarding its top surgical fellow with the opportunity to pursue cutting-edge research, fully funded, for the next two years." "The surgeons who will be competing for this award are Jeffrey Richmond..." "Lila Bradley..." "Patrick Curtis..." "Alex Reid..." " Charles Saipan..." " You two keep it clean out there." "I can't make any promises." "And finally, Maggie Lin." "We owe Dawn 50 hours of free overtime." "Congratulations, and may the best surgeon win." "Cheers." "You never did answer that question about that 18-month gap." "I'm not inebriated enough to tell that tale." "Shall we have a few more?" "Well, I don't even drink." "Plus, I'm leaving soon anyway." "I have a date." "You move on quickly." "I called Jonathan to make amends." "He's a lucky man, Dr. Hamza." "Hey." "I didn't want to disturb you." "I just left you a little something there." "I can't accept this." "It's not a handout, Angelo." "I'm just clearing Joel's debt." "This is way more than 100 bucks." "I added the interest." "What?" "I'm a rich prick in a lab coat, remember?" "I can afford it." "Nah." "You're not a prick." "You got a chip on your shoulder, though." "Listen, I don't care how you spend that." "You can blow it all on beer and atvs for all I care, but..." "You and Joel are square." "What about you and Joel?" "Hmm." "Get some rest, Angelo." "Hey." "Poker game in the basement next saturday." "This is a start, but if I'm thinking law school," "I'm gonna need some more of your money." "I said thinking about it." "Get some rest." "We've never competed for anything before, not directly." "It's not gonna get weird, is it?" "I don't know." "Let's make a deal." "No matter how hard this year gets, we won't let it stand in the way of our friendship." "May the best surgeon win." "It's gonna be me." "I was so nervous." "Cassie." "I-I wasn't expecting you to be here." "I, uh" "I had this whole speech planned." "You know, this doesn't look anything like Amy." "You're a liar, Tom." "The average human skull can withstand 2,100 pounds of compression." "And you want to tell me that your wife's fracture was caused by you placing her on the floor too roughly?" "Look, I already told you what happened, okay?" "I came home." "Amy was in the tub under the water." " I tried to pull her out, and..." " Right." "Look, I was trying everything I could do, but I couldn't keep her alive." "I was so, uh..." "I shook her." "You shook her?" "You shook her?" "What?" "Like what?" "Like..." "like this?" "Like that?" " Please, Charlie, don't." " Was it more than once?" " Don't do this." " Was it more like this?" "And this?" "Or this?" "This?" "This?" "!" "Stop it!" "Stop it!" "It wasn't like that!" "I spent half of the marriage on suicide watch." "I-I leave for an hour, and she's gone." "So you were angry." "I know how this makes me look, Charlie... but I loved her." "I want to believe you, Tom." "So help me."