"I'm not an aggressive person, but I admit it," "I like killing things." "But only in-game!" "I've been over it with my therapist, and I won't pretend it's not a form of sublimation." ""Bam, rent check!" "Die, Meter Maid!"" "Thing is, I would never do anything like that in real life." "I'm a strict theoretical vegetarian, so when I saw that guy fall down the stairs, most of me wanted to burst into tears and run in the opposite direction." "But a tiny, tiny part of me was like, "Dude!" "I just owned that guy!"" "Tiny part." "I swear." "Oh, gosh!" "I'm so sorry!" "Are you okay?" "Don't move!" "Don't move!" "No worries, Red." "Just practicing for my gag tomorrow." " You're what?" " I'm playing a salty pirate." "Okay." "Wade Wei, Apartment 20." "Stunt man by trade." "Call me "Guns."" "Wow." "A stunt guy?" "That's cool." "I know." "I gave you a little scare there." "Can't say I'm sorry." "That meant it played." "Okay." "I'm Codex." "No!" "I'm Cyd." "Cyd Sherman." "I'm apartment 16." "Right." "Just moved in with your husband." "No!" "No!" "Not!" "Uh, that was just a temporary roommate situation." "He introduced you guys as "The Shermans."" "Mentioned flatware patterns..." "some kind of wedding registry." "Wow, that's funny." "No, no, that was just a joke." "He is not here anymore, thank God." "I mean, he's still a friend, it's just, um well, there were some misconceptions on his part..." " You're cute." " I definitely don't know how to respond to that." "Oh!" "Oh, gosh!" "I'm sorry." "I've got to go." "I'm late for this, uh, online appointment." "No, that sounds weird." "It's just, uh, it's a little hard to explain." "I can't..." "I've got to go." "I've got to go." "See you around, Red." "Sorry, everyone!" "I ran into a... really cute..." "neighbor." "I'm working on a strategy to earn your love, my priestess of passion!" "Please don't disturb my Excel loot tables." "You guys, the quest to activate this orb is balls!" "I'm not Old McDonald." "I don't have time to farm all this crap!" "You know, Tink, if you ever need a man to season with that spice..." "I just got rid of one." "I'm not rebounding with someone straight out of puberty, thanks." "You broke up?" "Dish, dish!" "Yeah, I dumped him." "He was totally smothering me." "Called me, like, two times last week." "Tink, Clara, can I see you in the other channel, please?" "Sure!" "One sec!" "Bye, my preciouses!" "Eat lots of cake for Mommy!" "Oh, say bye-bye to Mommy!" "She's gotta..." "Clara's ready to go!" "Why do chicks have to talk in private like that?" "Do they need to synch their periods or something?" "Codex probably needs lady support." "Being apart is, quite frankly, tough on both of us." "I mean, she's totally crying right now." "Stunt man?" "Oh, my God!" "I was always so into Chuck Norris." "I wanted his moustache all over my body." "I've only pushed ugly people down the stairs." "Jealous!" "Yeah, I don't normally interact with guys with muscle tone." "There was definite eye contact." "Is that unusual for you?" " Yeah." "It is." " Did he touch you?" "Did he grab the back of your head and thrust his tongue down your throat?" "Clara, gross!" " Did he?" " Uh, no..." "I went to help him up, but he jumped off the ground by himself." "Ooh, like when an orc gets stunned, then bounces up to start cleaving." " Oh, my God, hot!" " Totally hot!" "Okay, Vork, what steps do I need to take to win Codex's love?" "I tried wiping my pit sweat on her pillow for, like, a week, so clearly the pheromone route is a no-go." "I am sexually neutral with regard to Guild members." "A position of authority is an intoxicating equation for females." "I wouldn't want to abuse it." "Dude, take the Bladezz train to success... give her crap." "Now that she's single, Tink will be all over it." "Hmm, the old bag o' douche technique?" "See, with Tink, I would just finish her orb quest for her." "She's a total mercenary like that." "So, I could be 400 Fernbrush, 62 Lynx Hearts, 8 Horror Fangs, and, like, 300 other components away from the Orient Express to paradise?" "Yeah, dude." "If only Codex were that easy!" "Type high-five, my brother!" "Warning!" "Women, in general, only yield short-term returns." "They are not a suitable vehicle for long-term investments." "Also, in my experience, very low drop rate." " All I can say is, have fun grinding." " Oh, I will." "I meant grinding for game ingredients!" " Sure you did." " Bladezz!" "Go after this guy." "Figure out the encounter and down him." "I just got rid of Zaboo." "I'm not looking for a guy right now." "Besides, he's prettier than me." "Codex!" "You can't let reality get in the way of what you want!" "Yeah!" "Like, I want to get my own orb..." "Ugh!" "Get over it, already!" "...but it's my stupid sister's wedding this weekend." "So I just told my husband that the groom squeezed my boob last summer, and totally got out of the entire trip." " Ew, he squeezed your boob?" " No." "I lied." "Bonus, hubbie had to take the kids 'cause they're the stupid flower girls!" "I'm so happy right now!" " You skipped your sister's wedding?" " Half-sister." "Look." "The point is, lie, and good things will happen." "Okay, good lesson." "Let's play now." "Back!" "Let's get Mommy an orb!" "Clara, we are scheduled for PVP from 2:00 to 4:00 p.m." "We can't put one person's loot needs above the group." "But I skipped my..." "Right!" "Hey, Tink, you know, I've got dagger skills." "I could help you with the orb stuff." "Was that Bladezz?" " You'd do some of this work for me?" " Well, yeah." "You know, nothing more than I'd do for any other smoking' Guildie, meaning, just you." "Oh, my God!" "That would be totally sweet!" "Thanks!" "What the... who the... how... huh?" "Someone just killed me right in the middle of the Guild Hall!" "That's so weird!" "Why would someone do that?"