"For 400 years, Yu Putuan remains the best of the top 3 banned books with its depictions of carnal desires" "There lived a monk in the Yuan Dynasty who always carried a sack" "Known as the Sack Monk he was well versed in Buddhist sutra" "A scholar nicknamed Wei Yang Sheng" "Was licentious by nature" "He considered celibacy unnatural" "When he consulted the Sack Monk" "They got into a heated argument and parted on a sour note" "Sir" "Consider your current life" "If you screw someone's wife or daughter" "Someone will screw yours" "You'll get instant retribution" "I thought with your eminence" "You must be very insightful" "I'm disappointed with such triteness" "If there's retribution for carnal intercourse" "What if I have no wife or daughter?" "Where does retribution come in?" "How about a man with few womenfolk who screws many women" "Even if his kin were screwed" "He'd still come out ahead!" "The groom kowtows to his father-in-law" "The groom offers tea" "We must tease the bride" "Yes!" "We must!" "Let's have a toast for the bride" "You must drink up!" "Drink up!" "We're leaving!" "Get out!" "Do you know my nickname is Mister Iron Gate?" "Because I'm strict with my family" "I clamp down hard on them like a gate" "I let you be my son-in-law, because of your learning" "Whether you travel or be an official" "You have nothing to worry about" "This is precisely the reason" "With you watching his wife he won't get retribution!" "Sex is the most pleasurable thing" "It'll hurt the first time" "But I'll be gentle" "You'll learn to enjoy it" "Sex is the most shameful thing" "Since it is stipulated by etiquette" "I will perform my duty" "But I know it'll hurt please hurry and spare me the agony!" "This is anaesthetic" "Put some on for me to ease the pain" "This is pain killer" "Give me some afterwards" "I'm ready!" "Hurry!" "What are you doing?" "Don't rush me!" "I'm not ready!" "Why not?" "Just stick it inside!" "Alright, as you wish..." "It hurts!" "Why did you kick me?" "Give me the pain killer, hurry!" "I'm not done yet!" "I've done my part" "I don't care if you're not finished!" "But you're not even bleeding!" "Says who?" "There's blood everywhere!" "Why is there so much blood?" "There's blood on my ring!" "You must have cut your dick with it!" "I'm going to pass out..." "My pain killer" "Give me the pain killer" "I told you this is filthy" "This is a genuine Zhao Meng Fu!" "Read it after fasting and ablution" "This is disgusting!" "It's passed down from our forefathers depicting the process of copulation it's no big deal!" "Don't..." "Quit the act..." "You used to hate sex" "Last night you wouldn't let go of me!" "I want..." "You're so naughty!" "Don't laugh at me!" "No!" "Wonderful!" "You're the famous cat burglar Sai Kunlun?" "Pardon me..." "I'm an honorable man" "I pick my targets carefully" "Not the poor" "Not those holding a funeral" "Not those hosting a banquet" "Not those I've stolen from before" "No one I know" "Strangers want to get to know me" "Or fawn upon me it's hard to find a target these days" "Now we've become like old friends" "I don't mind telling you the truth" "I'm supposed to pursue my studies" "But I'm actually courting women" "Since you can break into anyone's house" "You can help me find my prey" "Damn!" "I'm late!" "Bye!" "I really want to come with you!" "He's weird!" "Did he pick your pocket?" "It's here!" "Is it empty?" "No, but he left me stones!" "I found your target!" "Big enough tits for you?" "Yes!" "Keep up the good work!" "Miss..." "Are you alright?" "Miss...did you drop this?" " No!" " Take another look!" "Shame on you!" "Here's your money and 10% interest" "Master Sai..." "With your ability you can help me with women" "Help me break into their chambers" "If you help make my wish come true" "I'm willing to pay you generously" "It's risky to seduce someone's wife" "You may succeed initially" "But you'll eventually get dumped" "With my looks and talents?" "If you really want me to help you tell me how big is your dick?" "About this..." "When you screw a woman can you last half a joss stick?" "No problem!" "With aphrodisiac, I can last longer!" "There's a silk shop in the west end" "The owner's wife is your cup of tea" "Go take a look!" "Just to look?" " Maybe there's action!" " Great!" "What was that noise?" "I tripped and fell down!" "Did you rip the fabric?" "No!" "No?" "No!" " Eat!" " Sure!" "Why is there no fish tonight?" "There's none in the market!" "Not one fish in the entire market?" "No!" "Just not the kind you like!" "Speak clearly!" "Listen carefully before you answer me!" "Did you rip the fabric when you fell?" "Yes!" "Then you deserve a beating!" "I never said I won't do it!" "I just want to eat first!" "Are you done?" "Yes, thanks!" "Get over here!" "Come here!" "Hurry!" "What are you doing?" "Let you broaden your horizon!" "Her husband can last 3 joss sticks!" "But you can only last half a joss stick" "Look how big his dick is!" "You may brag all you want" "But yours is tiny it's best used as a tooth pick!" "This is for over estimating your ability in seducing someone else's wife!" "This is for your stupidity" "I'm not a lecher" "Yet you want me help you" "Do you think I'm a pimp?" "You're right about slapping me" "But I still need your help!" "You have character!" "Unless your dick is long like a horse's" "Master Sai..." "We've been apart for a month" "I feel lonely and sad" "I miss your hugs, kisses, screws" "My vagina feels itchy like bugs bite" "Do you know how this letter is written?" "It is written with ink mixed with my secretion" "Get me a knife!" "Why am I plagued with such a small dick?" "How I crave for a few more inches!" "You gave me looks and talents" "But you screwed me on the vital part!" "Damn!" "I'll cut you off!" "No, master!" "Don't!" " Go away!" " Don't" "Blood!" "My God!" "Did it come off?" "Not quite, why?" "Why what?" "Why is yours bigger than mine?" "Vvhy?" "I don't know!" "Ask my mom!" " No, Master!" " I'm asking you why?" "What's gong on?" "See for yourself!" "Closed!" "Doctor Ye on vacation" "I'm dead!" "I'm dead!" "Specialized in broken limbs" "Tian Can Zi is open for business" "I'm looking for Tian Can Zi" " Please tell me..." " Say no more!" "The wound is caused by a blunt knife about 2 joss sticks' time ago!" "You out the vein, not the arteries" "I can cure you now" "You'll recover in 15 days, 20 taels in advance" "You have incredible skills" "It's such an eye opener" "Coaptation is my family trade for 7 generations" "Until my father with a stroke of luck found part of Hua Tuo's manual and learnt about surgery" "I've studied my father's work and branched out into transplants especially for sexual organs" "Transplanting an animal organ to human" "And make them man enough" "I'll be rich and famous" "Have you succeeded?" "I have mastered the basic techniques" " Please give me a dog's dick!" " All right!" "Quiet!" "I don't mean you!" "Yours is too small, I won't use it!" "What about an elephant?" "That's too big!" "It'll be like having 3 legs!" "How about a horse?" "Sai Kunlun promised to help if my dick is long like a horse's!" "Get me a horse's dick!" "A scholar should not talk like that" "Pardon me!" "You must hurry if you need a transplant" "I'll be leaving in a few days" "By then, it'll be too late!" "Burn some joss sticks!" "May Master Hua Tuo watch over us" "Bless us with a successful operation!" "Please undress!" "It better not rain tonight" "We'll start around 3 a.m." "Why wait till then?" "All sexual organs, human or beast are most excitable before dawn!" "If we operate at this hour we'll get the best result!" "Horses get excited when they see red" "Here we go!" "This is the anaesthetic" "After you drink it" "You'll feel nothing below the waist" "Give the wine to the horse!" "I said give this to the horse!" "Why wine and not anaesthetic?" "Anaesthetics have no effect on horses" "We'll intoxicate it with wine!" "Leave the last gulp!" "What is this?" "I learnt this from foreign books it's called a guillotine" "I made a small one for this operation" "Quite an investment." "Let me show you!" "Not bad?" "It shrunk!" "Don't be scared!" "I'm not!" "I just saw a rat!" "I'm afraid of rats!" " I'm afraid of the rain!" " Why" "On a rainy night when I was little" "I saw with my own eyes my mom raped and killed" "Since then, on rainy nights" "Especially with thunder and lightning" "I'll get extremely emotional..." "Doctor... it'll be dawn soon" "Hold this, kid!" "Put the bottle over there" "We start before the first joss stick burns out" "Or else it'll be useless" "What about the second one?" "We must wrap up before, the second one goes out" "Why the long face?" "Cheer up!" "Relax!" "I'm as relaxed as I possibly can" "Good!" "Let's do it!" "I've out it off" "and stopped the bleeding" " Is it done?" " Yes!" "Does it hurt" "No!" "You're useless, kid!" "Get up, you coward!" "What is it?" "Nothing!" "What's going on?" "Just continue!" "He's still sober after the whole jug!" "He can certainly hold his liquor!" "Damn!" "We're running out of time!" "The horse is sober" "Let's do this instead" "I'll put yours back" "And do it again later?" "No!" "It's a one-off deal!" "I won't let you!" "I told you we don't have time!" "You may die from the inflammation!" "Doggie, don't take that!" "Doggie!" "Give me back my dick!" "Don't!" "Give that back to me!" "No!" "Give it back..." "Well?" "Did you get it?" "I got it back" "But this is all that's left!" "I have no choice" "We'll use the kid's dick!" "What about me?" "Be a eunuch, what else?" "Forget it!" "I have human rights too!" "You're sold as a page boy" "You have no rights" "Human rights mean only food and clothes" "Not the right to keep your dick!" " No!" " Take it out!" " No!" " Come back here!" "No!" "I only have a small one" "Just the same" "Hurry and fetch the basin!" "Ready..." "Doctor..." "What now?" "Get up!" "Get to work, kid!" "Let me help you!" " Damn!" " What now?" "Why can't I move?" "I broke the jar of anaesthetic and poured it all over you!" "Fetch me that bottle of licorice root" "Bring the basin as well!" "Pour it on my hands!" "Well?" "Nothing!" "Can't move!" "That's trouble!" "Can't move!" "How long does it take?" "At least half a joss stick's time" "The joss stick is burning out!" "No!" "I'm doomed!" "Destiny!" "You can move!" "Master, he can move!" "Stop!" "Don't strangle him!" "Let go!" "What kind of wine is this?" "Taste good!" "The rain has stopped!" "Get back to work!" "No sex in the next 100 days or else you'll be impotent!" "Buddy!" "You sent for me and challenged me to a duel" "Here I am" "I'll lend you my blade." "Come on!" "That's just an excuse to lure you here" "I wish to repay your kindness!" "Are you being sarcastic?" "No!" "You're a man of your word" "That's right!" "When you lectured me what was the last thing you said?" "I'll give you a good beating" "No!" "Any tips?" "Something to do with horses!" " Horse racing?" " No!" "Horse's dick!" "You have one?" "Boy!" "Sound the gong!" "Damn!" "You can't fool me with that rod!" "It looks like a horse's dick" "But that can't be real!" "It's real!" "There's a scar at the base" "It also has a different skin color" "How did you do it?" "You have a discerning eye" "This is a genuine horse dick" "I met a surgeon who transplanted it!" "You have guts, my friend!" "I admire you..." "Get it up!" "Show me!" "No problem!" "Give him a hand, kid!" "Use your mouth!" "You went through hell for this?" "You're finished, pal!" "I wish I can help!" "It's useless!" "Save your breath, kid!" "Before it rots you better cut if off!" "Or else the poison will go to your heart" "I can help you with that!" " Come on!" " Wait..." "Keep waving the blade" "Are you kidding?" "I feel something!" "Go on!" "You get excited from waving the blade?" "Yes!" "Let's try..." "Yes!" "Go on!" "Keep going!" "Don't stop!" "My master never told me this secret about the blade!" "Can I help you?" "I want white silk" "Do you have any?" "Yes!" "Have a seat!" "This is not white enough" "We have the whitest silk" "I see!" "Compared to your hands the silk is yellow!" "Everything is a matter of matching" "With your stunning beauty" "In my opinion" "You should marry someone with my good looks and talents" "If you marry a brute who beats you and lets you go hungry" "And makes you do strenuous work until your fingers bleed" "that would be like..." "A flower on a pile of cow dung" "Just like your vulgar husband" "You bastard!" "I'll kill you!" "I'm come see you again!" "Come back!" "Damn it!" "Are you blind?" "You stepped on my foot!" "Do you own the street?" "Sorry!" "it's my fault!" "I didn't see you!" "Sorry!" "Get lost!" "It hurts!" "I'll be gone for 10 days" "If I find you with another man, I'll wring your head off!" "I don't trust her" "Come in" "You have left an indelible impression" ""l feel bad about your beating by that vulgar man"" "I'm sending you medicine" "It is quite effective" "I'll drop by at midnight tonight with food and wine" "We can bare our souls and recite poetry" "Yours sincerely..." "Have pity on my Iovesickness" "I'm a virtuous woman" "I'm not that casual" "I bear gifts for you as well as food and wine" "All I ask is a drink and a chat" "No!" "I can%" "I can't believe this is a coincidence!" "See for yourself!" "My husband has the key" "This is my friend Sai Kunlun" "He's a famous locksmith" "This is delicious!" "Put it down!" "Go away!" "You helped this lecher seduce my wife and made me a cuckold!" "I've become a laughing stock" "I can't beat you" "But have a heart!" "I'll fight back if you corner me!" "Now in front of my friends and relatives" "We must resolve this" "I don't want any trouble" "Have him give me 100 taels of silver" "I'll sell him my wife" "And I'll leave here for good!" "If you won't do this" "You might as well kill me!" " Damn!" " Spineless wretch!" "I'm resuming my post in the capital" "I won't have leave for at least 6 months" "I don't mind if you serve the Emperor" "You better not go whoring!" "Is that what you think of me?" "You contracted gonorrhea last time and lied about it!" "You played me for a fool!" "I made this for you" "Wear it if you go whoring" "I'll kill you if you contract anything" "This size doesn't fit!" "This is tailor made for you it'll fit your dick!" "It's not that crooked!" "I know you're bisexual" "I really don't understand" "How can your husband satisfy you?" "Is his dick crooked?" "Whip me!" "What were you doing with the pen?" "Painting!" "You paint lying down?" "What's this garbage?" "It's secretion" "I mean...it's ink and wash" "Ink and wash?" "What's so secretive?" "Why close all the windows?" "Pornographic painting!" "This is outrageous!" "What have I taught you?" "You read this trash while you write this filth?" "Master!" "Where have you been?" "I brought Wang Qi to meet the mistress" "Really?" "Master" "This is the young mistress" "Hello!" "Wang Qi is the new gardener" "You're not allowed inside the chamber" "Or I'll have you locked up!" "Yes, sir!" " Get back to work!" " Yes!" "Kneel down!" "Read Zhu Zhi's Four Books on discipline" "Don't get up until you memorized it!" "You!" "You should have told me about her" "Put out your hand!" "The other one!" "You'll have to kneel too!" "Madam" "What is it?" "Your cousin is barging in" "I'm unable to stop her!" "Hide..." "Over here!" "Help me!" "Take out the calligraphy and painting" "Hurry..." "You haven't visited me for a long time" "Your husband is away, are you lonely?" "Why are these on the bed?" "I want to dry them under the sun" "So the trunk is empty" "There are stones inside" "We agreed to stick together through thick and thin" "Yes!" "If you have something good" "Should you share it with me?" "Yes!" "Did you come across a giant dick?" "I don't know what you're talking about" "He left last night" "You're too late!" "What kind of juice is this?" "It's still warm" "Wait on him" "Where am I?" "This room is connected to" "Rui Zhu's room next door" "Our mistress is Hua Chen" "She's Rui Zhu's cousin" "She became a widow after 2 years" "There's a rumor going on our master died from over indulgence in sexual pleasures!" "That's not true!" "As I know more about life and my husband is on the road" "My loneliness becomes unbearable" "I had an affair with Wang Qi" "And is now bearing his child" "I'm ashamed to see you" "So I must leave you" "I'll pray to Heaven" "And wish for your health and longevity" "Your unfilial daughter, Yu Xiang" "Have some tea" "I hired a palanquin for you" "So the trip won't be too difficult" "Be careful, don't make it too bumpy!" "What are you doing?" "Help me!" "Wang Qi!" "Wang Qi, help!" "Where are you, Wang Qi?" "Let me go!" "Who are you?" "What are you doing?" "I'm Gu Xian Niang" "Your husband sold you to our brothel" "Here's the contract" "Don't!" "I'm pregnant!" "Precisely because you're pregnant" "The herbal tea you took is to induce an abortion!" "The massage is to help you abort the baby!" "No!" "Let me go!" "Help!" "Your Majesty, the rebels are in pursuit" "The tyrant Wei Yang Sheng raped women and massacred common people" "By virtue of the mandate from Heaven the tyrant is sentenced to torture and rape until death" "No!" "This is too crazy!" "Tyrant!" "You took a horse's dick" "The mare will be reunited with its mate" "No!" "Help!" "You only focus on 2 points and 4 positions" "First, write with your vagina regardless of the size of the words they must appear to be written by hand" "This will train your vagina and your waist" "Second, practice with your tongue" "taste the gall" "If you can tolerate the bitterness" "YOU Can OVSFCOITIG the odor from any body parts" "During this process your abdomen will contract" "This is a good practice" "When you accomplish all this" "You can revive your patrons" "Help them feel like a man again!" "If you possess this unique skill" "You'll be the top prostitute" "Watch your step" "I can see" "I'm not blind" "Be careful!" "They want me to give you this!" "My husband's sudden return forces me to part with you" "I miss you" "I'm losing appetite and sleep" "My husband tells me" "There's a famous doctor who can revive any man!" "Cure your imperial dick" "And when my husband leaves" "We can copulate again" "My cousin has prepared a surprise" "Your lover, Rui Zhu" "We'll visit the capital" "Would you like to come?" "I can't!" "A constable by the name of Iron Hand has come after me" "I must stay and challenge him to a duel" "What does the sign say?" "Chamber of Revolving Heaven" "Please come in, Master Cai" "Please sit down!" "Take your time!" "Here comes the doctor!" "This is Master Cai from Kaifeng" "How are you?" "We'll help you undress!" "Let the doctor examine you!" "He can't be my husband, he's too big!" "Well?" "How am I?" "You have a great gift" "But your over indulgence has resulted in kidney failure" "I can cure you with medicine" "You'll be well in no time" "She sounds like my wife" "This doesn't work!" "You have something incredible it's responding to my treatment" "But not quite" "If you wear a red scarf and try again" "I guarantee it'll work" "Red scarf?" "This is a transplant" "It used to be tiny, right?" "How do you know?" "Just a wild guess!" "It's you!" "I knew when I grabbed your tits" "In this world" "Only my wife has a petite body and tits the size of water melons" "You bitch!" "I taught you the techniques" "Now you're using them as a prostitute!" "Don't!" "Don't!" "Come back!" "Come back!" "Sir!" "Come back!" " Sir!" " Come out, bitch" "No!" "Come on out!" "I'll strip you" "Parade you through the streets in a cage" "And bring shame to your moralist father" "Who are you?" "How dare you start trouble here?" "The commander is my patron" "She's my wife" "I'll sue you for kidnapping" "Move away!" "Qiu Yan, don't worry!" "Break in!" "Qiu Yan...you silly girl!" "Bring me a stool..." "let her down" "She's dead..." "You're in trouble!" "I know my mistakes now, Master" "I believe in retribution" "I've done many evil deeds" "I lost my hands in the duel" "I must go in hiding" "I know my mistakes" "You have returned" "Please let me stay here" "You'll be tonsured and named Wanshi" "Please take me in as well" "Face the wall and meditate" "Summon Kumeng" "Have you made peace?" "Whenever I close my eyes" "I see Yu Xiang's baby coming at me for revenge" "Wanshi, turn around" "Do you know each other?" "Today you get retribution for yesterday's crimes" "Tomorrow, you get retribution for today's crimes" "Love and hate perpetuate retribution" "Set aside your hatred, be your true self" "Understand?"