"ALL RIGHT." "HERE'S THE BET." "FOR 10 BUCKS..." "I'LL DRINK THIS MUCH OF ANYTHING." "ANYTHING?" "ANYTHING." "AS LONG AS IT'S SOMETHING YOU CAN EAT." "OK, ONLY STUFF FROM THE KITCHEN." "NOTHING FROM THE BATHROOM AND NOTHING FROM THE GARAGE." "OK." "AND IT HAS TO BE FOOD, OK?" "NOTHING FROM UNDER THE SINK." "OK?" "NO CLEANSERS, NO DETERGENT," "NO FURNITURE POLISH," "AND NO CUT UP BITS OF SPONGE." "OK." "I'M JUST TRYING TO WIN 10 BUCKS HERE." "I DON'T WANNA DIE." "ALL RIGHT, NOW PUT ON..." "THE BLINDFOLD." "THE BLINDFOLD." "I DON'T WANT TO MESS UP MY HAIR." "ALL RIGHT." "AND NOW STEP INTO" "THE SOUNDPROOF BOOTH." "THE SOUNDPROOF BOOTH." "I'M TRUSTING YOU GUYS." "I'M TRUSTING YOU GUYS." "OK, PUT IN SOME MUSTARD." "IT'S AN IPECAC." "IT'LL MAKE HIM BARF." "DON'T MAKE HIMBARF." "MY MOM COOKS DINNER IN HERE!" "IF WE'RE NOT TRYING TO MAKE HIM BARF," "THEN WHY ARE WE DOING THIS?" "I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING YOU GUYS ARE SAYING." "COME ON, BILL!" "QUIT LISTENING!" "I CAN'T HELP IT." "THEN HUM SO YOU CAN'T HEAR US." "[HUMMING]" "CAYENNE PEPPER." "OOH!" "GOOD ONE!" "PASS ME THE PICKLE JUICE." "[HUMMING]" "YOU KNOW, MY COUSIN..." "ONCE DRANK AN ENTIRE JAR OF PICKLE JUICE." "HE HAD TO SIT ON THE TOILET FOR 10 HOURS." "OH, GOD, THAT'S NASTY!" "OH, THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT." "SALT..." "SARDINES..." "AW!" "DISGUSTING!" "OH, MAN!" "[HUMMING]" "VINEGAR!" "MMM..." "WAIT, WAIT..." "VINEGAR!" "SOY SAUCE." "SOY SAUCE!" "dd HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM dd" "CHILI!" "FOR TEXTURE." "THAT'S DISGUSTING!" "EXACTLY!" "AND JUST A LITTLE BIT OF JELLY." "SOME DAIRY CREAMER." "AND..." "TOP IT ALL OFF..." "A COUPLE OF AFTER-DINNER MINTS." "HA HA HA!" "ALL RIGHT." "NOW MIX IT UP." "ALL RIGHT." "ALL RIGHT." "dd HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM dd" "OH, GOD!" "OH, IT'S BUBBLING!" "HA HA HA!" "THAT'S DISGUSTING!" "ALL RIGHT." "dd HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM HMM dd" "OUCH!" "IT'S SHOW TIME!" "IT'S SHOW TIME!" "LET ME SEE THE MONEY FIRST." "LET ME SEE THE MONEY FIRST." "COME ON, DRINK UP ALREADY." "DON'T RUSH ME." "DON'T RUSH ME." "UH..." "EEW!" "EEW!" "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" "IT'S NOT BAD." "IT'S NOT BAD." "OH!" "EEW!" "OH, COME ON!" "[LAUGHS] IT'S MAKING ME SICK!" "CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY DREAMWORKS TELEVISION." "L.L.C." "dd I DON'T GIVE A DAMN 'BOUT MY REPUTATION dd dd I DON'T GIVE A DAMN 'BOUT MY REPUTATION dd" "dd LIVIN' IN THE PAST, IT'S A NEW GENERATIO dd GO AND DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO dd dd AND THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO dd dd AND I DON'T GIVE A DAMN 'BOUT MY BAD REPUTATION dd" "dd AND I DON'T GIVE A DAMN 'BOUT MY BAD REPUTATION dd dd OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO dd dd NOT ME dd dd WHAH!" "NO!" "dd dd NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO dd dd NOT ME dd dd ME, ME, ME, ME dd dd I DON'T GIVE A DAMN 'BOUT MY REPUTATION dd dd I DON'T GIVE A DAMN 'BOUT MY REPUTATION dd" "dd I'VE NEVER BEEN AFRAID OF ANY DEVIATION dd dd I'VE NEVER BEEN AFRAID OF ANY DEVIATION dd dd AND I DON'T REALLY CARE IF YOU THINK I'M STRANGE dd dd I AIN'T GONNA CHANGE dd" "dd AND I'M NEVER GONNA CARE 'BOUT MY BAD REPUTATION dd dd AND I'M NEVER GONNA CARE 'BOUT MY BAD REPUTATION dd dd NOT ME!" "dd dd NOT ME!" "dd" "HEY, LOOK!" "MAPLEFARM REALTY" "GAVE EVERYONE IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD FREE PUMPKINS!" "WASN'T THAT NICE?" "WELL, THERE'S NOTHING NICE ABOUT IT." "IT'S A CHEAP WAY TO GET CUSTOMERS." "THEY GIVE YOU A 20-CENT PUMPKIN," "YOU GIVE THEM 10 GRAND TO SELL THE HOUSE." "SOME DEAL." "WELL, I JUST THINK IT WAS NICE." "OOH." "HEY, CAN I HAVE THE PRIZE?" "MY BOWL..." "MY PRIZE." "COME ON." "COME ON." "[WHISTLES]" "[WHISTLES]" "SAM, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO, KILL ME?" "SORRY." "HEY, SAMMY, WHAT ARE YOU GOING OUT AS FOR HALLOWEEN?" "I-I'M NOT GOING OUT." "BILL AND I ARE GONNA SEETHE NUDE BOMBAT PARKWAY." "HEY, THAT'S A DIRTY MOVIE." "DAD, IT'S A GET SMART MOVIE." "WHOA, WHOA, WHOA." "YOU'RE NOT GOING TRICK OR TREATING?" "MOM!" "I-I'M IN NINTH GRADE!" "I KNOW." "BUT YOU WENT OUT LAST YEAR." "YEAH." "WELL, LAST YEAR I WAS IN JUNIOR HIGH." "YEAH, BUT SAM..." "HONEY, THE BOY'S 14." "HE CAN MISS A NIGHT OF WALKING AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD" "BEGGIN' LIKE A TRAMP." "HALLOWEEN'S FOR LITTLE KIDS ANYWAY." "HEY, LINDSAY," "YOU'RE STILL GONNA HAND OUT CANDY WITH ME, AREN'T YOU?" "REMEMBER HOW MUCH FUN WE HAD LAST YEAR" "LOOKING AT ALL THE LITTLE KIDS IN THEIR COSTUMES?" "YEAH, MOM." "I TOLD YOU I WAS GOING TO." "WELL, GOOD!" "'CAUSE WE'RE GONNA HAVE" "A REALLY GOOD TIME THIS YEAR," "I PROMISE." "I PROMISE." "HEY, LINDSAY." "LONG TIME NO SEE." "I SAW YOU OUT HERE YESTERDAY." "WHY ARE YOU WEARING A HAT?" "IT'S THE DAY BEFORE HALLOWEEN." "THAT YOUR COSTUME?" "IT KINDA SUCKS." "NO." "IT'S DEVIL'S DAY." "EACH YEAR, THE SENIORS BRING IN HAIR REMOVAL FOAM" "AND SPRAY IT ON FRESHMEN'S HEADS." "THEN ALL YOUR HAIR FALLS OUT." "REALLY?" "NO." "THAT STUPID RUMOR'S BEEN AROUND FOR YEARS." "YEAH, I KNOW." "I WAS JUST GOOFIN' ON 'EM." "NO, YOU WEREN'T!" "YES, I WAS." "Millie:" "HEY, LINDSAY." "HEY, MILLIE." "HEY, MILLIE." "WHAT ARE YOU DOING TOMORROW NIGHT?" "MY CHURCH IS HAVING A HALLOWEEN DANCE." "YOU WANNA COME?" "OH." "WELL..." "I WOULD GO," "BUT I GOTTA HAND OUT CANDY WITH MY MOM." "OH." "OK." "OH." "OK." "DO YOU WANT SOME LICK-A-MAID?" "NO." "YOU EAT CANDYNOW?" "MILLIE, IT'S 7:30 IN THE MORNING." "IT'S JUST LICK-A-MAID." "IT MAKES MY SPIT TASTE LIKE FRUIT JUICE." "IT MAKES MY SPIT TASTE LIKE FRUIT JUICE." "[VEHICLE APPROACHING]" "HEY, CHECK IT OUT." "IT'S LINDSAY." "HEY, LINDSAY." "WHAT'S UP?" "HEY, DANIEL." "HEY, KIM." "HELLO, BRAIN." "SO, THIS IS YOUR BUS STOP?" "[KIM GIGGLES]" "YEAH." "YEAH." "WE'VE HAD THE SAME BUS STOP SINCE KINDERGARTEN." "HOW FAST DOES YOUR CAR GO?" "150, IF I HOOK UP THE NITROUS TANK." "[KIM GIGGLES]" "YOUR CAR IS REALLY LOUD." "MY DAD SAYS YOU NEED A MUFFLER." "ONCE HE EVEN THREW A ROCK AT YOU WHEN YOU DROVE BY." "BUT..." "I GUESS YOU DIDN'T HEAR IT." "HE THREW A ROCK AT ME?" "HEY, KID, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU EATING?" "IS THAT LAUNDRY SOAP?" "IT'S LICK-A-MAID." "WANT SOME?" "MILLIE..." "U-UM..." "I'LL PASS." "UH, YEAH." "WE GOTTA GET GOIN'." "I'D GIVE YOU A RIDE, LINDS," "BUT I GOT AN ENGINE BLOCK IN THE BACKSEAT." "YEAH." "YEAH." "MMM!" "MMM!" "THANKS FOR THE CANDY, SKINNY." "[ENGINE ROARS]" "[ENGINE ROARS]" "SEE?" "MY DAD'S RIGHT." "HE NEEDS A MUFFLER." "HE NEEDS A MUFFLER." "SO ARE YOU GUYS GOING TO SARA'S PARTY TOMORROW NIGHT?" "YEAH, BUT I THINK I'M GOING TO JIM'S FIRST." "YEAH, BUT I THINK I'M GOING TO JIM'S FIRST." "HEY!" "IF IT ISN'T THE..." "AMELIA EARHART OF McKINLEY HIGH." "WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?" "WELL, YOU HEAD TO CLASS, BUT YOU NEVER SEEM TO GET THERE." "MR. ROSSO, COULD YOU NOT HUMILIATE ME IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE SCHOOL?" "COME ON, LINDSAY, DON'T TURN ME INTO THE MAN HERE." "I'M JUST TRYING TO HELP YOU." "AND IF, WHEN YOU GRADUATE, IT TURNS OUT I DID HELP YOU" "BUT YOU HATE ME..." "I'M OK WITH THAT." "I GOTTA GET TO CLASS." "SEE?" "IT'S WORKIN' ALREADY." "SEE?" "IT'S WORKIN' ALREADY." "EMBARRASSING." "THAT'S THE ONLY WORD I CAN THINK OF" "TO DESCRIBE THESE BOOKS YOU'VE CHOSEN TO DO YOUR REPORTS ON." "TO DESCRIBE THESE BOOKS YOU'VE CHOSEN TO DO YOUR REPORTS ON." "AL JAFFE'S SNAPPY ANSWERS TO STUPID QUESTIONS." "THE NOVELIZATION OF "STAR WARS."" "YES, I CAN..." "THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF SAMMY DAVIS, JR." "THE AUTOBIOGRAPHY OF SAMMY DAVIS, JR." "CRIME AND PUNISHMENT IS A GOOD EXAMPLE" "OF THE KIND OF BOOK YOU SHOULD BE READING NOW." "IN IT, FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY" "WAS ATTEMPTING TO CREATE" "WHAT SOME WOULD CALL" "AN EXISTENTIAL ENIGMA..." "AN EXISTENTIAL ENIGMA..." "A PROTAGONIST WHO WAS BOTH A NIHILIST" "AND A MORALIST." "NOW, I KNOW THIS SOUNDS CONFUSING TO YOU ALL," "BUT SOON YOU'LL ALL KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT," "BECAUSE I EXPECT YOU TO HAVE" "THE FIRST HALF OF THIS BOOK READ BY MONDAY." "[CLASS GROANS] IT'S TIME TO GROW UP, PEOPLE!" "[CLASS GROANS] IT'S TIME TO GROW UP, PEOPLE!" "YOU LIKE THAT?" "NO!" "GETS YOU HOT?" "WOULD YOU KNOCK IT OFF?" "YOU'RE MAKING ME SICK!" "HEY..." "WHY DON'T YOU MAKE OUT WITH NICKY THERE," "AND WE'LL CALL IT A FOURSOME?" "YEAH." "WHY DON'T YOU MAKE OUT WITH MY BUTT, AND WE'LL CALL IT LOVE?" "HEY, YOU GUYS, BE COOL." "THE NARC'S HERE." "YEAH." "WATCH OUT, OR I'LL BUST YOU." "HEY, MAN, I AIN'T JOKING." "I HEARD ABOUT WHAT YOU DID TO BRIAN STOKER." "SAW HIM SMOKING A "J" OUTSIDE THE QUICK FILL" "AND WENT INSIDE AND TOLD SOME COPS?" "BRIAN'S IN PRISON NOW, MAN." "AND I HEARD HIS BROTHER'S LOOKIN' FOR YOU." "WHAT?" "I DIDN'T DO THAT." "WHAT?" "I DIDN'T DO THAT." "YEAH." "I KNOW." "I WAS JUST MESSING WITH YOU." "SHE GOT ME WITH THAT SAME JOKE LAST WEEK." "IT'S KINDA FUNNY, THOUGH." "IT'S KINDA FUNNY, THOUGH." "HILARIOUS." "HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' FOR HALLOWEEN?" "OH, I HAVE TO HAND OUT CANDY WITH MY MOM." "I KNOW, IT..." "SOUNDS REALLY DORKY." "SHE GETS REALLY INTO IT." "OH, LINDSAY," "I DON'T THINK THAT SOUNDS DORKY AT ALL." "YOU KNOW WHAT?" "AT LEAST SHE'S BEIN' NICE." "JUST BECAUSE YOU HATE YOUR MOTHER" "DOESN'T MEAN THAT EVERYBODY ELSE DOES, OK?" "NO, EVERYBODY HATES HER MOTHER." "Kim:" "HA HA HA!" "WELL, WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?" "OH, WELL, UH, KIM, NICK AND I ARE GOIN' OUT." "BORROWIN' MY UNCLE'S BIG-ASS CADDY, AND..." "WE THOUGHT MAYBE YOU'D LIKE TO COME WITH US." "OH, YOU MEAN LIKE A..." "DOUBLE DATE?" "OH, YOU MEAN LIKE A..." "DOUBLE DATE?" "IF THAT'S WHAT YOU NEED" "TO CALL IT IN YOUR DIARY, PRINCESS." "TO CALL IT IN YOUR DIARY, PRINCESS." "I CAN'T." "YOUR LOSS." "[BELL RINGS]" "OH, THE BELL." "LET'S NOT BE LATE FOR CLASS." "[LAUGHS] YEAH, RIGHT!" "HEY, LINDSAY," "I--YOU KNOW, I THINK IT'S" "I THINK IT'S NICE THAT YOU'RE HELPING YOUR MOM HAND OUT CANDY." "SO..." "I'LL SEE YOU LATER." "YEAH." "SEE YOU LATER." "SEE YOU LATER." "THIS IS GONNA TAKE LIKE A TRILLION YEARS TO READ." "I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT IT'S ABOUT." "WHITMAN SAID IT'S ABOUT AN AX MURDERER." "THAT SOUNDS KINDA COOL." "I GUARANTEE YOU IT'S NOT GONNA BE COOL." "I MEAN..." "LOOK HOW SMALL THE PRINTING IS." "UH, PERHAPS YOU'VE NEVER HEARD" "OF A LITTLE THING CALLED..." "CLIFF NOTES?" "YOU STILL HAVE TO READ THEM." "WHITMAN IS SUCH A JERK!" "YOU KNOW?" "SHE SAYS YOU HAVE TO BE YOUNG ADULTS." "WE'RE NOT ADULTS." "WE'RE KIDS UNTIL WE TURN 18." "MAYBE YOU ARE." "BUT WHEN" "I HIT 13, I BECAME A MAN." "THAT'S ONLY IN YOUR TEMPLE, NEAL, NOT IN THE REAL WORLD." "HEY!" "WE SHOULD GO TRICK OR TREATING TOMORROW NIGHT." "IN CASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED," "WE'RE A LITTLE OLD." "NO, WE'RE NOT, OK?" "WE WENT TRICK OR TREATING LAST YEAR." "COME ON." "LET'S GO OUT TOMORROW NIGHT." "NO WAY." "I'M GOING TO THE J.C.'S HAUNTED HOUSE." "THE HOTDOG ON A STICK GIRLS" "FROM THE MALL ARE WORKIN' IT." "THE TALL ONES?" "YEAH." "JUDY." "THEY'RE HOT." "TOOTIE, TOOTIE!" "ALL RIGHT, THEN WHY DON'T WE" "GO TRICK OR TREATING BEFORE THAT?" "WHY DON'T WE JUST GO BUY CANDY?" "OH, YEAH, THAT'S REALLYFUN." "COME ON!" "IT'LL BE A BLAST." "IT'S BETTER THAN SITTING HOME READING SOME STUPID RUSSIAN BOOK." "SURE." "OK, YOU KNOW, I" "YEAH, I GUESS-- I COULD-- YOU KNOW, WE" "I--YEAH, I GUESS SO." "I DON'T KNOW." "YOU'RE NEVER GONNA DRESS UP AS GROUCHO AGAIN?" "YOU'RE NEVER GONNA DRESS UP AS GROUCHO AGAIN?" "WELL..." "[AS GROUCHO] THAT'S THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING" "I'VE EVER HOIRD!" "GROUCHO SUCKS." "GROUCHO SUCKS." "TOMMY!" "HONEY!" "HONEY!" "LINDSAY!" "LINDSAY!" "HEY, LINDSAY." "WHAT'S UP?" "MILLIE, WHO IS THAT?" "MILLIE, WHO IS THAT?" "WHO?" "MILLIE!" "MILLIE!" "YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO SEE." "THAT'S TOMMY, MY SECRET LOVE." "WE MET THIS SUMMER AT CHURCH CAMP." "YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?" "LINDSAY, YOU'VE GOTTA KEEP THIS A SECRET." "I MEAN..." "TOMMY AND I DON'T EVEN FRENCH KISS YET." "TOMMY SAYS THAT IF YOU DO" "BEFORE YOU'VE BEEN GOING OUT FOR 6 MONTHS, YOU GO TO HELL." "WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?" "I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE YOU FEEL BAD..." "SINCE YOU DON'T HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND ALL." "SINCE YOU DON'T HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND ALL." "COME ON." "NO WAY!" "I'M TELLING YOU, MAN." "IT'S TRUE." "WHEN I HEARD HIM PLAY AT COBO HALL, THE GUY WAS AMAZING." "WHOA, HOLD ON A SECOND." "SO THEY'RE CALLED SANTANA, RIGHT?" "BUT THAT GUY WHO'S SINGING..." "IS NOT SANTANA." "NO." "SANTANA'S THE GUITAR PLAYER." "THEN HOW DID HE GET THEM TO NAME THE BAND AFTER HIM?" "I DON'T KNOW, MAN." "MAYBE HE'S JUST A BAD ASS." "IF THAT'S TRUE, THAT'S..." "AMAZING." "HEY, MAYBE WE SHOULD NAME OUR BAND ZARIOS." "Lindsay:" "HEY!" "I'M GOING OUT WITH YOU GUYS TOMORROW NIGHT." "HEY!" "HEY, THAT'S GREAT!" "YEAH, BUT WHAT ABOUT YOUR MOM?" "HOW'S SHE GONNA HAND OUT CANDY ALL BY HERSELF?" "HOW'S SHE GONNA HAND OUT CANDY ALL BY HERSELF?" "WELL, SHE'LL SURVIVE." "WELL, WELL, WELL..." "WELL, WELL, WELL... dd dd YOU DID THE MASH d dd YOU DID THE MONTHSTER MASH d dd IT WAS A SMASH dd HA." "dd IT WAS A GRAVEYARD SMASH dd RIGHT?" "[GIGGLES]" "Sam:" "HEY, MOM," "NEAL, BILL, AND I DECIDED TO GO TRICK OR TREATING TOMORROW NIGHT." "OH, SAM, THAT'S GREAT!" "WE HAVE TO GET YOU A COSTUME." "NO, MOM." "I'M GONNA MAKE MY OWN." "I'M GOIN' OUT AS GORT." "HE'S THE ROBOT FROM THE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL." "OOH!" "GORT!" "HOW EXCITING!" "SAM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" "YOU'RE TOO OLD TO GO OUT TRICK OR TREATING." "OH, HAROLD, STOP." "WELL, IT'S TRUE!" "THERE WAS THIS KID IN MY NEIGHBORHOOD" "WHEN I WAS GROWING UP" "SCOTT BYRON." "HE KEPT ON TRICK OR TREATING UNTIL HE WAS WELL INTO HIS 20s." "YOU KNOW WHERE HE'S LIVING NOW?" "AT HOME." "WITH HIS 90-YEAR-OLD MOTHER!" "HE'S THE LAUGHINGSTOCK OF THE COMMUNITY." "NEVER TOOK A WIFE, EITHER." "I DON'T THINK THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG" "WITH ACTING LIKE A KID EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE." "I KNOW LINDSAY AND I" "ARE GONNA HAVE A GREAT TIME TOMORROW NIGHT, AREN'T WE, SWEETIE?" "YEAH, MOM." "WE SURE ARE." "dd HE DID THE MASH dd dd HE DID THE MONTHSTER MASH dd" "Both: dd IT WAS A SMASH dd dd IT WAS A GRAVEYARD SMASH dd" "[GIGGLING]" "[GIGGLING]" "THEN BILL AND I'LL COME BY YOUR PLACE." "AND BRING PILLOW CASES." "NO GROCERY BAGS." "IF YOUR BAG RIPS, YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN." "I'M GONNA BRING MY PLASTIC PUMPKIN." "DON'T BRING THAT." "IT GETS FULL AFTER ONE STREET." "NOT IF I EAT THE CANDY AS WE GO." "LAST TIME YOU DID THAT," "YOU PUKED BEFORE WE GOT PAST OUR BUS STOP." "HEY, GUYS." "I HEARD YOU WERE GOING OUT FOR TRICK OR TREATS TONIGHT." "HOW DID YOU FIND OUT ABOUT THAT?" "WORD GETS OUT." "PEOPLE TALK." "BUT YOU GOTTA BE ESPECIALLY CAREFUL, THOUGH." "THE HALLOWEEN CANDY'S GONNA BE REALLY DANGEROUS THIS YEAR." "THEY SAY THAT EVERY YEAR." "YEAH, BUT THIS YEAR THERE'S A BUNCH OF EVIL HIPPIES" "WHO DON'T WANT REAGAN TO BE PRESIDENT," "SO TO DISRUPT THE ELECTION, THEY'RE GOING TO EJECT THE CANDY WITH HEROIN" "AND TURN KIDS INTO ADDICTS." "THAT'S NOT TRUE." "YOU JUST HAVE TO WATCH OUT FOR PINS AND RAZOR BLADES." "YEAH, AND RAT HAIR'S A BIG ONE." "YOU'RE GONNA FIND YOURSELF WISHING FOR RAT HAIR." "WORD ON THE STREET IS THEY'RE PUTTING A POO" "IN FUN-SIZED CANDY BAR WRAPPERS AND HANDING THOSE OUT." "I LOVE FUN-SIZED CANDY BARS." "OH, THAT'S STUPID." "LIKE NOBODY'D BE ABLE TO TELL WHAT IT REALLY WAS." "THEY DIP IT IN CHOCOLATE FIRST" "SO YOU CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE." "SO YOU CAN'T TELL THE DIFFERENCE UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE." "SEE YA." "SEE YA." "ACTUALLY, IT SOUNDS KINDA FUN." "YOU MIND IF I COME WITH YOU GUYS?" "YOU MIND IF I COME WITH YOU GUYS?" "MOM?" "IN THE KITCHEN!" "IN THE KITCHEN!" "HEY, LINDSAY, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" "YOU'RE GONNA MISS THE FIRST TRICK OR TREATERS." "YOU KNOW THE CUTEST ONES ALWAYS COME EARLY." "YEAH." "WELL, I WAS HANGING OUT WITH MY FRIENDS." "LINDSAY..." "LO--AH!" "OW." "LOOK AT WHAT WE'RE GONNA HAND OUT THIS YEAR." "HALLOWEEN COOKIES!" "[GIGGLES]" "THAT'S GREAT, MOM." "Sam:" "WHAT'S UP WITH ALL THE COOKIES?" "SAM, I LAID YOUR ROBOT COSTUME OUT ON YOUR BED." "YOU DIDN'T RIP IT, DID YOU?" "NO." "BUT I WROTE, "MY SON'S THE CUTEST BOY IN THE WHOLE WORLD"" "ON THE FRONT OF IT." "LINDSAY, I GOT YOU A COSTUME." "GO PUT IT ON, SWEETIE." "I'M GONNA PUT THESE COOKIES BY THE DOOR." "WE ARE GONNA HAVE SO MUCH FUN!" "WE ARE GONNA HAVE SO MUCH FUN!" "KINDA HATE WHEN MOM GETS GOOFY LIKE THAT." "KINDA HATE WHEN MOM GETS GOOFY LIKE THAT." "MMM." "LOOKIN' FOR CHAPLIN..." "I'M ONLY SEEING HITLER." "I'M ONLY SEEING HITLER." "IF I WERE THE BIONIC WOMAN..." "WHAT WOULD I WEAR?" "WHAT WOULD I WEAR?" "THIS IS RIDICULOUS." "I LOOK LIKE TOM SELLECK!" "dd GONNA RAISE HELL dd" "MOM!" "MOM!" "dd GONNA RAISE HELL dd dd GONNA RAISE HELL dd" "I'M SORRY, STEVE AUSTIN." "I CAN'T MARRY YOU." "I'M MAD AT YOU RIGHT NOW." "WHAT?" "I'M SORRY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU." "HOLD ON." "I'M GONNA PUT THE PHONE ON MY BIONIC EAR." "I'M GONNA PUT THE PHONE ON MY BIONIC EAR." "THAT'S--THAT'S BETTER." "NO, DON'T TALK SO LOUD!" "DON'T FORGET, I'VE GOT BIONIC HEARING." "NO, THESE ARE NOT BIONIC." "THESE AREALLME." "THESE AREALLME." "I HEARD THAT CRACK, PAL." "OH--OH, IT WASN'T YOU." "OH, OK, I GUESS I'LL JUST" "[MAKING BIONIC SOUND] DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DO..." "OSCAR GOLDMAN, IT'S ME, JAIME SOMMERS." "STEVE AUSTIN IS TRAPPED IN THE--IN THE REACTING" "HI, MOM." "OK." "YOU CAN..." "USE THE PHONE." "[DOORBELL RINGS]" "OH." "HEY, LINDSAY," "HURRY UP, HONEY." "OUR FIRST LITTLE VISITORS ARE HERE!" "OUR FIRST LITTLE VISITORS ARE HERE!" "LINDS?" "OH!" "OH..." "HA!" "OH, MY..." "WHAT AN..." "INTERESTING..." "COSTUME." "OH, WA" "HERE YOU GO." "ALL RIGHT." "HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "ALL RIGHT." "HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "DO YOU--DO YOU WANT ANOTHER COOKIE?" "OK." "I'M, UH..." "I'M HERE TO GO OUT" "FOR TRICK OR TREATS TONIGHT WITH SAM." "OH, YOU'RE ONE OF SAM'S FRIEN" "I AM SO SORRY." "COME ON IN." "MY GOSH!" "SORRY." "MY GOSH!" "SORRY." "NICE COSTUME." "YOU LOOK LIKE" "RICHARD BENJAMIN INWESTWORLD." "RICHARD BENJAMIN INWESTWORLD." "SAY, DON'TYOU LOOK NICE?" "SAY, DON'TYOU LOOK NICE?" "WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE?" "I'M A GUY WITH A KNIFE THROUGH HIS HEAD." "OH." "WELL..." "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED." "HEY, MOM!" "MOM, I GOTTA TALK TO YOU." "[DOORBELL RINGS]" "GET YOUR COSTUME ON, HONEY." "THE TRICK OR TREATERS ARE HERE!" "OH!" "Both:" "TRICK OR TREAT, SMELL OUR FEET," "GIVE US SOMETHING GOOD TO EAT." "IF YOU" "HA HA HA!" "YOU GUYS ARE BOTH GREAT." "COME ON IN!" "GET IN HERE!" "HA HA HA!" "HA HA HA!" "WOW." "HARRIS, THAT LOOKS REALLY REAL." "HOW DO YOU KNOW IT ISN'T?" "HOW DO YOU KNOW IT ISN'T?" "OH!" "IF I HELD YOU ANY CLOSER, I'D BE IN BACK OF YA." "HEY, CUT THAT OUT!" "YOU KNOW, BILL, YOU LOOK REALLY LOVELY." "I'M JAIME SOMMERS, THE BIONIC WOMAN." "OH, OF COURSE YOU ARE!" "[WHEELS SCREECH]" "WHAT WAS THAT?" "[HORN HONKS]" "MOM..." "I'M GONNA GO HANG OUT WITH" "MY FRIENDS FOR A LITTLE BIT, OK?" "I'LL BE BACK." "WAIT, LINDSAY..." "MOM, I'LL BE BACK!" "SWEETIE, WAIT!" "COME ON, LINDSAY." "LET'S GO." "COME ON, LINDSAY." "LET'S GO." "YOU HAVE ANY FAKE BLOOD AROUND HERE?" "I WANNA FRESHEN UP MY WOUND BEFORE WE GO OUT." "WHAT?" "WHAT?" "SHE DID WHAT?" "!" "SHE SAID IT WAS ONLY GONNA BE FOR A LITTLE WHILE." "SHE'LL BE BACK." "YOU KNOW, SHE WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS." "YEAH." "WELL, SHE BETTER BE BACK." "THAT'S ALL I CAN SAY." "THAT DAUGHTER OF YOURS IS ON THIN ICE." "UNTIL SHE GETS BACK, WOULD YOU PUT THIS ON" "AND HELP ME PASS OUT COOKIES." "AND HELP ME PASS OUT COOKIES." "OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD." "WHOA-OH-OH-OH!" "DON'T FALL OUT." "DON'T FALL OUT." "BOO." "BOO." "HIS PLANS FELL THROUGH." "YOU KNOW?" "I'M SORRY." "dd SHE'S A ROLLER dd dd A HIGH-ROLLER BABY dd" "KNOCK IT OFF, BLONDIE." "YOU'RE GONNA BLOW THE SPEAKERS." "OH, I'M SORRY, GRANDPA." "I'LL TRY NOT TO BLOW ANYTHING OF YOURS FROM NOW ON." "I'LL TRY NOT TO BLOW ANYTHING OF YOURS FROM NOW ON." "HEY!" "WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?" "THERE'S THIS HAUNTED HOUSE" "THAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE REALLY SCARY." "YEAH." "HEY, DUDE." "THAT COULD BE KIND OF FUN, RIGHT?" "FOR WHO, LOSERS?" "HEY, SHUT UP." "I LIKE HAUNTED HOUSES." "HA HA HA." "I REST MY CASE." "OH, LISTEN." "CAN'T WE JUST DRIVE AROUND," "SEE WHERE THE NIGHT TAKES US." "IS THAT COOL WITH YOU?" "LINDSAY?" "YEAH." "I'M UP FOR ANYTHING." "Daniel:" "RIGHT ON, KID." "HEY, I'M REALLY GLAD THAT YOU DECIDED TO COME." "THANKS." "SO AM I." "SO AM I." "HA." "YOU TWO ARE ADORABLE." "YOU TWO ARE ADORABLE." "MOM, LOOK." "JESSICA, COME ON." "DON'T STARE." "IT'S NOT POLITE." "IT'S NOT POLITE." "WHY IS EVERYBODY STARING AT ME?" "I MEAN, YOU'D THINK THEY NEVER SAW THE BIONIC WOMAN BEFORE." "THEY JUST PROBABLY DIDN'T KNOW SHE WAS SO HOT IN REAL LIFE." "HA HA HA." "YOU--ARE YOU-- ARE YOU JOKING?" "YOU'RE JOKING, RIGHT?" "I SAW THE REAL JAMIE SOMMERS AT THE AUTO SHOW LAST YEAR." "HER BOOBS WEREN'T THAT BIG." "HEY, WE SHOULD GO TO THE RICH NEIGHBORHOOD FIRST." "THEY HAND OUT THE BEST CANDY." "IT'S NOT TRUE." "RICH PEOPLE TRADITIONALLY GIVE OUT THE CHEAPEST CANDY." "IT'S HOW THEY STAY RICH." "Bill:" "I JUST HOPE I GET SOME CANDY I CAN EAT." "YEAH, I'M ALLERGIC TO PEANUTS, LICORICE AND NOUGAT." "HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY BE ALLERGIC TO NOUGAT?" "HA HA HA." "I DON'T KNOW." "UH, MY DOCTOR SAYS I'M ALLERGIC TO MORE THINGS" "THAN ANYONE HE'S EVER SEEN." "THEN I GOT DIBS ON ALL YOUR MALT BALLS." "YOU CAN HAVE 'EM." "I LIKE PIXIE STICKS." "PIXIE STICKS RULE." "NO WAY." "CHUNKIES ARE THE BEST." "UH-UH." "CANDY CORN, MY FRIEND." "I MUST ADMIT, I'M A WAX LIPS MAN MYSELF." "Kids:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "WHY, YOU'RE THE CUTEST THINGS." "HEY, HAROLD, COME LOOK!" "AAAAH!" "Kids:" "AAAAAH!" "OH, KIDS!" "I WAS JUST KIDDING!" "I'M NOT REALLY A VAMPIRE." "I OWN A SPORTING GOODS STORE." "HEY?" "WHAT'S THE BIG IDEA," "SCARING MY KIDS?" "I--I DIDN'T MEAN TO." "NO, I--I'M SORRY." "I MADE HIM PUT THIS ON." "HERE." "GIVE THESE TO YOUR CHILDREN." "THEY'RE HOMEMADE." "ARE YOU CRAZY?" "I'VE BEEN LECTURING MY KIDS FOR WEEKS" "NOT TO TAKE UNWRAPPED CANDY." "THOSE COOKIES COULD HAVE RAZOR BLADES" "OR PINS IN THEM." "I--I WOULDN'T DO THAT." "I--I WOULDN'T DO THAT." "COME ON, COWGIRL." "ENOUGH OF THIS KID'S STUFF." "LET'S HEAD OUT TO THE BARN," "AND I'LL GIVE YOU A REAL GOOD ROLL IN THE HAY." "OH, HAROLD, NOT NOW." "OH, HAROLD, NOT NOW." "WHEN?" "I MEAN, THINK ABOUT IT." "ALL THE PEOPLE IN THIS TOWN ARE REAL RELIGIOUS." "BUT JUST 'CAUSE IT'S HALLOWEEN," "THEY'LL HANG PICTURES OF DEVILS, WITCHES, GHOSTS" "ALL OVER THEIR HOUSES." "IT'S A JOKE." "YEAH." "YEAH, I KNOW." "IT'S TOTAL WHITE, MIDDLE-CLASS HYPOCRISY." "YEAH." "RIGHT." "EXACTLY." "YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I THINK ABOUT IT?" "[BURPS]" "Ken:" "THAT'S LOVELY, YOU KNOW." "YOUR YEARS" "IN CHARM SCHOOL REALLY PAID OFF." "BY THE WAY, HOW ARE THINGS GOING AT ASS SCHOOL?" "GETTING ALL As." "OHH." "HEY, YOU KNOW WHERE WE COULD GO?" "WE COULD GO TO THE MOVIES." "THERE'S A NEW FRIDAY THE 13thPLAYING." "GOD, GREAT!" "WHY ARE YOU SO HUNG UP" "ABOUT DOING SOMETHING?" "WHAT?" "ARE WE BORING TO YOU?" "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" "WE SHOULD DO SOMETHING." "WE CAN'T JUST DRIVE AROUND ALL NIGHT, MAN." "HEY, MAN, WE AIN'T GONNA JUST DRIVE AROUND." "IT'S HALLOWEEN." "WE ARE... dd GONNA RAISE HELL, GONNA RAISE HELL dd dd GONNA RAISE HELL dd dd GONNA RAISE HELL dd" "[DOORBELL BUZZES]" "Together:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "OK..." "YEAH." "WHAT DO YOU WANT?" "UH..." "TRICK OR TREAT." "AREN'T YOU GUYS A LITTLE OLD FOR THIS?" "AREN'T YOU GUYS A LITTLE OLD FOR THIS?" "WE'RE ONLY FRESHMEN IN HIGH SCHOOL." "HIGH SCHOOL?" "THAT'S TOO OLD." "THAT'S TOO OLD." "WE'RE YOUNG AT HEART." "WE'RE YOUNG AT HEART." "OOH, CIRCUS PEANUTS." "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE ANYWAY?" "THE TIN MAN?" "I'M--I'M GORT." "HE'S THE ROBOT" "FROMTHE DAY THE EARTH STOOD STILL." "YOU LOOK LIKE THE FRICKING TIN MAN." "Bill:" "UM, MA'AM..." "I HOPE THERE AREN'T ANY PEANUTS IN THESE PEANUTS." "'CAUSE IF THERE ARE, I COULD D-DIE." "GOOD NIGHT." "GOOD NIGHT." "THESE ARE SO CUTE." "BUT, YOU KNOW, JEAN, THEY TRAIN THE KIDS" "NOT TO TAKE UNWRAPPED FOODSTUFFS." "YOU SHOULD SEE ALL THE PARENTS" "WHO ARE DUMPING THE COOKIES ON YOUR LAWN." "THEY'RE ALL COVERED WITH ANTS." "WHAT?" "!" "WELL, HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "WELL, HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "I GIVE UP." "I GIVE UP." "HAROLD, RUN UP TO FARMER JACK AND BUY SOME CANDY." "WHAT?" "DRESSED LIKE THIS?" "WHAT?" "DRESSED LIKE THIS?" "ALL RIGHT." "DON'T ANSWER THE DOOR TILL I GET BACK." "DON'T ANSWER THE DOOR TILL I GET BACK." "STUPID KIDS' HOLIDAY." "STUPID KIDS' HOLIDAY." "I SAY WE MAKE LINDSAY DO IT." "Daniel:" "NO." "I'M GOING IN." "HEY, NO, NO, MAN." "LET ME DO IT, ALL RIGHT?" "OK." "OK." "Daniel:" "HEY, RELAX." "IT'S HALLOWEEN." "WE'RE SUPPOSED TO DO THIS STUFF." "IT'S HALLOWEEN." "WE'RE SUPPOSED TO DO THIS STUFF." "Daniel:" "WHOA!" "Daniel:" "WHOA!" "WHOA!" "WHOA!" "OH, MAN." "THAT IS SO UNCOOL." "OH, MAN." "THAT IS SO UNCOOL." "I CAN'T BELIEVE WE JUST DID THAT." "YES, CONGRATULATIONS TO US ALL, INDEED." "I'M SO HAPPY I'M NOT AT THE TED NUGENT CONCERT." "I'M SO HAPPY I'M NOT AT THE TED NUGENT CONCERT." "GO." "GO AHEAD, LINDS." "GO." "YOU CAN DO IT." "YOU CAN DO IT." "OH, MY..." "OH, MY..." "Ken:" "OH, MY GOD." "COME ON!" "COME ON, LINDSAY!" "COME ON!" "COME ON, LINDSAY!" "HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "THIS ONE'S FOR YOU." "Harris:" "OH, LOOK." "IT'S FUN-SIZED." "YOU GUYS HAVING A GOOD TIME?" "YEAH." "HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "UM..." "THANK YOU." "UH..." "I'LL EAT IT-- I'LL EAT IT LATER." "UH..." "I'LL EAT IT-- I'LL EAT IT LATER." "WHOA!" "WHOA!" "dd YOU LOOK TOO GOOD TO ME dd dd YOUR BEADY EYES dd dd THEY CUT ME IN TWO dd dd AND I JUST CAN'T LET YOU BE dd dd WELL IT'S A FREE-FOR-ALL dd dd AND I HEARD IT SAID dd" "dd YOU CAN BET YOUR LIFE dd dd STAKES ARE HIGH AND SO AM I dd dd IT'S IN THE AIR TONIGHT dd dd IT'S A FREE-FOR-ALL dd" "BATTER UP, BABY!" "BATTER UP, BABY!" "WATCH IT, BABY!" "WATCH IT, BABY!" "dd IT'S A FREE-FOR-ALL dd dd IT'S A FREE-FOR-ALL dd dd YEAH, IT'S A FREE-FOR-ALL dd dd YEAH, IT'S A FREE-FOR-ALL dd" "ALL RIGHT." "THERE IT IS." "GO FOR IT, WEIR." "DO IT ALREADY." "OK, OK." "OK, OK." "WHOA!" "HA HA!" "WHOA!" "HA HA!" "GREAT." "THANKS A LOT." "I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS." "I CAN'T BELIEVE THE HOT-DOG-ON-A-STICK GIRLS SAW US." "THAT'S MONTHS OF GROUNDWORK DOWN THE DRAIN." "LIKE THEY'D EVER GO OUT WITH YOU." "HEY, SHUT UP." "THEY LIKE ME." "THEY ALWAYS GIVE ME FREE LEMONADE REFILLS." "Alan:" "WELL, WELL, WELL." "IF IT ISN'T THE GEEK PATROL." "OH, NO, NO, NO, NO." "OH, MY GOD." "HEY, ALAN." "WHAT'S UP?" "I DON'T KNOW WHOSE ASS I WANT TO KICK FIRST." "YOU BETTER WATCH OUT, ALAN." "WE KICKED YOUR ASS ONCE." "WE'LL KICK IT AGAIN." "I DON'T THINK SO." "THAT WAS 3 AGAINST ONE." "NOW WE GOT US A FAIR FIGHT." "IT'S TIME TO SETTLE THE SCORE." "Daniel:" "OH, YEAH." "HA HA HA HA." "NO, NO, NO." "I GOT IT." "I GOT IT." "LET'S GO SOAP THE SCHOOL'S WINDOWS." "NO, LOOK." "I SAY IT'S TIME WE GET DOWN TO SOME SERIOUS DAMAGE." "KENNETH?" "KENNETH?" "BREAKFAST, ANYONE?" "Nick:" "OH, MY GOODNESS." "WE DON'T WANT TO FIGHT YOU, ALAN." "Alan:" "YOU DON'T HAVE TO." "JUST GIVE US YOUR CANDY AND YOU'RE FREE TO GO." "OK, HERE." "OK, HERE." "Alan:" "NOW YOU, DORK." "FORGET IT." "WE WENT THROUGH A LOT FOR THIS." "SHUT YOUR MOUTH, YOU LITTLE GIRL." "I'M NOT A LITTLE GIRL." "I'M A BIONIC WOMAN." "YEAH?" "PROVE IT." "YEAH?" "PROVE IT." "Neal:" "NO, CUT IT OUT." "STOP." "JUST TAKE THE CANDY." "THIS IS MY GRANDPA'S COAT." "[CLOTH RIPS]" "OW." "FELL ON MY KNIFE." "COME ON, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE." "COME ON, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE." "Neal:" "THAT'S IT." "THAT IS IT." "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT." "I NEVER SHOULD HAVE LET YOU TALK ME INTO THIS." "I DIDN'T TALK YOU INTO ANYTHING." "OH, WELL, IT SURE AS HELL WASN'T MY IDEA." "OH, WELL, IT SURE AS HELL WASN'T MY IDEA." "OH, YEAH." "YOU'RE TOO COOL" "GETTING FREE LEMONADE REFILLS." "Bill:" "GUYS!" "LET'S JUST STICK TO THE PLAN." "THIS THING ON STRAIGHT?" "THIS THING ON STRAIGHT?" "KNOW HOW TO DO IT?" "DIG IN, CHILDREN." "AWESOME." "THANK YOU." "ALL RIGHT, JACKPOT." "JACKPOT." "COME ON." "ALL RIGHT." "WHERE?" "Kim:" "READY?" "OVER THERE!" "WHERE?" "YOU'RE SUCH A LITTLE BABY." "HAVE TO HAYOUR L ITTLE BABY'S EVENING." "OH, YEAH, AND GOING TO SOME STUPID HAUNTED HOUSE" "IS THAT MUCH BETTER." "YEAH, AND YOU'RE STUPID." "TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE." "WELL, YOU ARE ONE." "ENOUGH, GUYS." "COME ON." "MY BRA'S CHAFING." "LET'S GET HOME." "Lindsay:" "WHERE?" "I CAN'T SEE." "KIM, YOU'RE BLOCKING MY VIEW." "NOW!" "NOW!" "[CHEERING]" "AWESOME, MAN." "THAT WAS SO AWESOME." "Daniel:" "NAILED 'EM, BABY, NAILED 'EM." "WHAT?" "OH, MY GOD." "WHAT?" "WE JUST EGGED MY LITTLE BROTHER." "WE JUST EGGED MY LITTLE BROTHER." "OH, MY GOD." "WAIT, STOP THE CAR." "IT'S JUST EGGS." "HE'LL BE FINE." "NO, STOP THE CAR." "PLEASE, DANIEL." "JUST TAKE IT EASY." "TAKE IT EASY." "LET ME OUT OF THE CAR!" "HEY, DANIEL, STOP THE CAR, ALL RIGHT?" "JUST STOP THE CAR." "LET HER OUT." "DON'T GET OUT." "WE'LL GET HIM." "Lindsay:" "SAM?" "Lindsay:" "SAM?" "GENTLEMEN..." "I'M GOING HOME." "I'M GOING HOME." "OH, MY GOD." "THEY'RE COMING BACK TO FINISH US OFF." "RUN FOR IT!" "LET'S GO CUT THROUGH THEIR BACK YARD!" "LET'S GO CUT THROUGH THEIR BACK YARD!" "SAM?" "SAM, I'M SORRY." "LOOK, GET IN THE CAR." "LOOK, GET IN THE CAR." "SAM, I'M REALLY SORRY." "PLEASE?" "COME ON." "LET US GIVE YOU A RIDE HOME, OK?" "LET US GIVE YOU A RIDE HOME, OK?" "Daniel:" "KID." "IT'S NOT YOUR SISTER'S FAULT." "SHE DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT WAS YOU." "LOOK, SHE'S REALLY, REALLY UPSET, KID." "I SWEAR TO GOD." "IT'S TRUE, SAM." "I SWEAR TO GOD." "IT'S TRUE, SAM." "I SWEAR TO GOD." "SAM!" "SAM!" "GOD." "IS IT JUST ME, OR DID HE SEEM UPSET?" "WOULD YOU SHUT UP, PLEASE?" "HA HA HA HA." "JUST GIVE HER A BREAK, ALL RIGHT?" "MAN, I AM IN SO MUCH TROUBLE." "JUST TAKE ME HOME." "NO, HEY, WHY DON'T YOU JUST STICK AROUND" "JUST TAKE HER HOME, ALREADY." "GOD." "I TOLD YOU SHE'D BE A DRAG." "I TOLD YOU SHE'D BE A DRAG." "dd MOTHER dd dd MOTHER dd" "[DOORBELL RINGS]" "Kids:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "Kids:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "[DOOR OPENS]" "OH, MY GOD." "SAM, WHAT HAPPENED!" "I GOT EGGED." "WHAT'S THE MATTER?" "WHAT'S GOING ON?" "SAM GOT ATTACKED." "ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?" "DID YOU GET EGG IN YOUR EYE?" "I'M FINE." "OH, MY GOD." "OH, MY GOD." "Harold:" "WELL, WELL, WELL." "LOOK WHO'S HERE." "SO HAPPY YOU COULD GRACE US WITH YOUR PRESENCE." "Jean:" "WHAT KIND OF TERRIBLE PEOPLE" "WOULD DO THIS TO A LITTLE BOY?" "WHO THE HELL DID THIS TO YOU, SAM?" "WHO THE HELL DID THIS TO YOU, SAM?" "SOME FREAKS." "FREAKS?" "LIKE CIRCUS FREAKS?" "JEAN, I DON'T THINK THERE'S BEARDED LADIES" "RUNNING AROUND THROWING EGGS AT KIDS." "HE MEANS HIPPIES." "YOU KNOW WHO THESE FREAKS WERE?" "JUST A BUNCH OF DIRTBAGS." "OH, HONEY." "MY LITTLE BABY BOY." "I'M NOT A BABY." "I'M NOT A BABY." "CERTAINLY GLAD WE ALL DECIDED TO CELEBRATE HALLOWEEN." "LAST TIME I HAD THIS MUCH FUN" "I WAS PINNED DOWN IN A FOXHOLE BY THE NORTH KOREANS." "I WAS PINNED DOWN IN A FOXHOLE BY THE NORTH KOREANS." "I'M SORRY, HON." "YOU DID A NICE JOB." "YOU DID A NICE JOB." "AND YOU ARE ON THIN ICE, MISSY." "AND YOU ARE ON THIN ICE, MISSY." "WHEW." "I DIDN'T EXPECT YOU BACK SO SOON." "MOM, I TOLD YOU I'D BE BACK IN A LITTLE BIT." "WHO WERE THOSE PEOPLE YOU WENT OFF WITH?" "JUST SOME FRIENDS FROM SCHOOL." "ANYONE I KNOW?" "UNH-UNH." "NOT REALLY." "LINDSAY, IF YOU DIDN'T WANT TO HAND OUT CANDY WITH ME," "YOU COULD HAVE JUST TOLD ME." "I COULDN'T" "MOM, I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE YOU FEEL BAD." "MOM, I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE YOU FEEL BAD." "OH, I DON'T KNOW." "[SIGHS]" "THE WORLD IS SUCH A DIFFERENT PLACE" "THAN THE ONE I GREW UP IN." "EVERYONE JUST SEEMS SO MUCH MEANER THESE DAYS." "MOM, KIDS DIDN'T THROW EGGS WHEN YOU WERE IN SCHOOL?" "I DON'T KNOW." "I GUESS SO." "I DON'T KNOW." "I GUESS SO." "I JUST KNOW I NEVER DID." "I JUST KNOW I NEVER DID." "[KNOCK ON DOOR]" "[DOOR OPENS]" "[DOOR OPENS]" "NOTHING LIKE GETTING YELLED AT BY DAD" "WHEN HE'S DRESSED LIKE A VAMPIRE, HUH?" "WHEN HE'S DRESSED LIKE A VAMPIRE, HUH?" "THANKS FOR NOT TURNING ME IN." "THANKS FOR NOT TURNING ME IN." "I'M REALLY SORRY." "YOU KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU?" "I'M REALLY SORRY." "YOU KNOW THAT, DON'T YOU?" "NOBODY THINKS YOU'RE COOL, YOU KNOW." "NOBODY THINKS YOU'RE COOL, YOU KNOW." "TRUST ME." "I KNOW." "TRUST ME." "I KNOW." "[DOORBELL RINGS] Kids:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "[DOORBELL RINGS] Kids:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "Lindsay:" "MOM?" "OH, NO." "HA HA HA." "THAT'S THE WRONG COSTUME." "THAT'S THE WRONG COSTUME." "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE MY LITTLE PRINCESS." "YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE MY LITTLE PRINCESS." "WELL, I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO BE" "YOUR LITTLE PRINCE INSTEAD." "YOUR LITTLE PRINCE INSTEAD." "[DOORBELL RINGS]" "I'LL GET IT." "OHH." "Kids:" "TRICK OR TREAT!" "AREN'T YOU THE CUTEST THINGS?" "LINDSAY, AREN'T THEY CUTE?" "YEAH." "THEY ARE." "YEAH." "THEY ARE." "HERE YOU GO." "HERE YOU GO." "HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "HAPPY HALLOWEEN." "SAM?" "CAN I COME IN?" "YEAH." "YEAH." "YOU OK?" "YEAH." "I'M JUST READING A BOOK FOR SCHOOL." "YEAH." "I'M JUST READING A BOOK FOR SCHOOL." "IS IT ANY GOOD?" "I DON'T KNOW YET." "EVERYONE'S NAME IS REALLY WEIRD AND LONG." "EVERYONE'S NAME IS REALLY WEIRD AND LONG." "WELL, DON'T STAY UP TOO LATE." "I WON'T, DAD." "I WON'T, DAD." "CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY DREAMWORKS TELEVISION, L.L.C."