"Male announcer:" "And now, nickelodeon and dreamworks'" "Monsters vs. Aliens." " ¶ mva ¶" "¶ mva ¶" " ¶ monsters vs. Aliens ¶" "¶ it's us vs. Them" "¶ foe vs. Friend" "¶ brain vs. B.O.B." " ¶ it's a super-freaky job" " Oh, yeah, it's freaky." " ¶ mva ¶" " ¶ monsters vs. Aliens ¶" " [cackles] - ¶ monsters vs. Aliens ¶" "¶ monsters vs. Aliens ¶" "¶ mva ¶" "[upbeat rock music]" "¶" " Eyes and ears, people." "I've called you here for a very special presentation" "From our resident genius." " Wow!" "This is unexpected." "I-I didn't prepare any formal remarks," "But I'm happy to wing it." " I meant the other genius." " Greetings!" " Oh." "Of course." " [grunts]" "As part of my earth studies research," "I have made some interesting observations." " Great." " Hey!" "Be nice." " Specifically, your ground vehicles" "Are shockingly slow," "Which is why I created the x-25." "[engine revving]" " Ah!" "[tires screeching]" "If awesome married incredible" "And then had a beautiful baby," "That baby would be called..." "X-25!" "Wah-hoo-hoo-hoo!" "[imitates engine revving]" "That's, uh..." "Yeah, I was just saying..." "That is one sweet ride." " So sweet your teeth will fall out," "Which is exactly what happened" "To the first guy who tried to drive it." " It's too fast." " Still, the top brass" "Want the x-25 fully checked out." "So I need a guinea pi" "I mean, test driver of the nonhuman variety." " [grunting] - question." "Does this so-called "test driver"" "Need to know how to "drive."" " Yes, b.O.B., and you do not know how to drive." " I'm out." " General, I was hots for this job." " Make us proud, fish man." " General monger, I must object." "The car is alien technology." " Precisely, I am the logical choice" "For this task." " You?" "[laughs]" "Your tiny feet wouldn't even reach the pedals." " Hey!" "I created it." " For this job, I nominate" " I will drive to honor and glory." "¶ sta'abi, ah, ah, ah, ah ¶" " How long was she up there?" " Two days." " She likes to make an entrance." " I already made my road trip mix, so..." "Ping!" "[electricity crackling]" "Missy, you just opened up" "A can of carbonated link." " Ah, good." "We make the combat." " Whoa, whoa, whoa." "You both want to drive the x-25?" "Take it to the rampage room." "Winner drives." "Loser cries." "You will be put through a series of tests" "That will push you to the edge mentally and physically." "Whoever proves they've got the right stuff," "Pilots the car." " You will eat failure." " Not while these gills suck air." "[laughs] woot!" " As a fellow contestant," "I, too, wish to engage in trash talk." "I will win more points than either of you" "By a statistically significant amount." "Hey!" "I created it!" "Wait!" " Oh, the youth" "And their sense of entitlement, right?" "[chuckles]" " X-25 candidates," "The stress test begins..." "Now!" " [grunts]" " Begins when again?" "Let me know when you're ready to start." " I thought we were to be having contest," "Not the baby pampering." "[electronic beeping] [machine whirring] [grunting and whimpering]" "It's like fire moon of scorcherin." "Me like!" " Come on, general." "[grunts]" "Tell me you've got more than this." "Please, I was frozen in a block of ice" "For 20,000 years." "This is nothing." " I-I, too, am mocking this test." " You want more?" "Fine, hotshots." "Show me agility!" "[both panting]" "Stamina!" "Endurance!" "Concentration." " Hmm..." " Sense of whimsy." " What are we being again?" " Magic pixies." "I think." " Looks like we got us a tie." " Not for long." "The next event is swimming." " Game, set, match!" "Link will crush her." "[knuckles crack]" " You're okay on land," "But agua es mi casa." "It means I live in the water" "Or, technically, that my house is water." "Anyway, you're going down!" " I hope you swim the water" "Better than you trash the talk." " Ready, set... [whistle blows]" " [grunting]" " Huh, how braggy he was," "I thought link would be less drown-y." " He usually is." "He's a natural." "[link grunting]" " Ugh, this is pathetic..." "Suspiciously pathetic." " Ah!" "Quite a contest, eh?" "Both:" "Go, link!" "Go, link!" " [grunting]" " Ah, thought for certain" "The swamp monkey would do better." "Go, sta'abi." " Swim!" "Swim!" "Swim!" " Go, link!" "Stroke!" "Stroke!" "Stroke!" "No!" "Don't have a stroke!" " Miss link is crushed." " Alien power, huzzah!" " Sta'abi wins." "Somebody fish link out of the drink." " How?" "I just..." "I don't..." "I'm a fish man." "I swim..." "Like a fish..." "Man." " So sta'abi gets to drive the world's fastest car." "So what?" " [whimpering]" " Okay, okay." "Forget I said that." "Look, it was a fluke." "You know what you need to do?" "Get back on that horse and swim." " Horse and swim?" "You're sure you want to go with that?" " It's a sea horse, all right?" "Point is, link needs to get back in the water." " Right." "Go, link!" "He's doing it!" " He's sinking, b.O.B." " Which, if you think about it," "Is just swimming down." "Hey, way to go, pal." "Nobody sinks like you." " Swimming any other direction would be better." " Don't listen to the doubters." "You keep right on sinking." " He's down as far as he can go, b.O.B." " You did it, buddy!" "You hit rock bottom." "Yay, link!" " [whimpers]" " The x-25 is one pricey piece of hardware." "Last thing we want is to end up" "Parking it in the side of a mountain." "So just light her up," "Cruise at top speed for a couple of seconds," "And then shut her down." "Don't get fancy out there." " I never get fancy." " Why do I have to be here?" " It's called being a good sport." " Don't want to be a good sport." " Sta'abi might wipe out and crash the x-25," "Explosions, balls of flame." "You wouldn't want to miss that." " Really?" "You think that might happen?" " Oh, there's a chance it will." "0.8%." " I like those odds." " I think these things are broken." "Ah." "Much better." " Booster boots, activate." "I believe I am now sized appropriately for the task." " General, might I make one suggestion?" " No, but I got a feeling that ain't gonna stop you." " I am merely demonstrating" "The best candidate for this job is me." "[engine whirring]" "After all, I created... [screams]" " [screams]" " Aliens!" " Hey, guys, do you know sta'abi looks just like sqweep?" " What?" "Sqweep's in that car?" " No, sta'abi looks just like sqweep." "Aren't you listening?" " Sqweep, you're not authorized for this mission." "Power down a.S.A.P." " [stammering] sorry, general." "I seem to have made an unfortunate miscalculation." "I cannot stop it." " Monsters are on it, general." " This is an alien situation," "And aliens will handle it." "Latching onto the vehicle with my telekinetic powers," "I simply will... [screams]" "Ooh!" "Stop!" "Stop!" "I order you to" "Ungh!" "[grumbling]" " [trembling]" " Sqweep's coming back!" " [screams]" " I got this!" "Oh, man!" "Got the wrong alien." " I thank you regardless." "[groans]" " For honor and glory." "¶ sta'abi, ah, ah, ah, ah ¶" "Ungh!" " Agh!" " Given the fixed speed of the x-25," "I could calculate an intersection point." " The slingshot express." " Seriously?" " A kid's life is on the line." "Slingshot me!" " Agh!" " Now!" " [gasps] link!" " Hey, kid." "What's up?" "Whoo!" " If you're attempting a rescue," "Please hurry!" " Right." "Sorry." " I believe the earth expression is..." "Agh!" "Both:" "Agh!" "[screaming]" " Ah, fish sticks." " Your failed attempt to save me is appreciated." " Fail..." "Ungh." "[groans]" "Not while these gills suck air." "[electricity crackling] [explosion]" " I created it." " I feel your pain." "Good-bye, you big, beautiful dream machine." "My dream." " Explain yourself, little sqweep." " X-25 was for me to drive." " Exactly." "What was the point of me cheating for sta'abi" "If you were just going to take the car anyway?" "Answer me that, child." " Say that again." " Cheated?" " Um, well, yes," "Just a little bit" "To assure your victory." "Sort of a victory assist, if you will." " This is an insult to my ancestors" "And my descendants." "I must avenge their past and future honor." " Agh!" " Awesome." " Now fleeing for life!" " Well said." " Welcome to the end of the world." " I see." "Will it be catered?" " Mr. President, we're looking at a global disaster." "There is a wisonsin-sized meteor" "On a collision course with earth." "This is armageddon!" " And armageddin' hungry over here." "What's it take to scare up a deli tray?" " Mr. President-- - general." "I'm not worried about the planet," "Not with your crack team on the job." " Your confidence is well placed, sir." " Oh, I didn't mean you monsters." " Inferior life-forms," "I grace you with my presence." " [grunts]" "So top secret, high level" "Basically means anybody" "Can just stroll in whenever they please." " I have been studying" "The approaching meteor for months." "This hurtling hunk of doom," "Which I have nicknamed big ned," "Will be most difficult to destroy." " For a pathetic earthling, perhaps." "For an alien..." "Pbbt." "Child's play." " So you got the little cute one rolling on this." " Yes, sqweep is a busy bee" "Modifying one of your missiles" "To blast ned into space dust." " You don't know ned like I know ned." "He is a super-dense amalgamation of minerals." "If the rocket does not hit at the precise spot," "Kiss your thorax good-bye." " Did I hear someone express a craving for deli?" " [chomps]" "Go, aliens!" " I win..." "Again." " You, sir, forget we monsters" "Have defeated aliens in the past." " Must have been beginner's luck." " [grumbles]" " [grunts] I feel your pain, doc." "But what are you gonna do?" "They're aliens." "It's a space thing." " Not the point, link." "Dr. C was on the case." "He named the meteor, for crying out loud." " Which is kind of weird." "Think that was the deal breaker?" " It sounds like things got pretty tense in there." "Now, tell me again about the sandwich." " The sandwich was the least important" "Part of the story, b.O.B." " Not if you skipped lunch," "Which I did..." "Skip lunch." " It's 10:00 a.M., b.O.B." " I have low blood sugar." " You don't have blood." " Well, I told you it was low." " ¶ uh-oh, uh-oh" " Excuse me, guys." " Ungh." " ¶ oh, yeah" " [grunting] - oh, man." "Anybody seen my phone?" " ¶ uh-oh, uh-oh" " I thought it was a candy bar." " A candy bar with a ringtone?" " I thought it was a really cool candy bar." "[low rumbling] [dramatic instrumental music]" "¶" " [grunts]" " And what do you think you are doing?" " I have completed my modifications." "It is now time to analyze the meteor's flight path" "And plot the rocket's trajectory." " Ah, buh, buh, buh." "The president put team alien" "In charge of the launch." " Affirmative." " And I am in charge of team alien." "So..." " So this is one of your unpleasant bossy moments." " Smart child." " Pbbt." "[eerie music]" " Must have been beginner's luck." "[scoffs]" "Coverton will rue the day" "He mocked monsters." " Whatcha up to, doc?" " Working." " Doctor, your whatever this is." " Ionic disrupter, and do be careful." " [screams] [glass shattering]" " I work alone, b.O.B." " Gotcha." " [laughs diabolically] [eerie organ music]" " [laughs]" " I laugh alone as well, b.O.B." " [muffled] okay." " Ooh, brain wave." "Who's up for a rousing game of hide-and-seek?" " Ooh, can I seek?" " I was thinking you might hide." " Can I hide?" " Splendid idea, b.O.B." "Off you go." "Now, where was I?" "Ah, yes." "[laughs diabolically] [eerie organ music]" " [panting]" "Need to find the most awesomest hiding place ever." "Hmm?" "[laughs]" "Oh, yeah!" "[laughs]" "There it is." "[laughs]" " While I oversee the launch with the president," "I command you three-- agh!" " Choose new words." " I, uh...." "Request..." " [grunts]" " Humbly." " Better." " Look, I simply cannot have" "Those monsters ruining this." "Wherever they go, catastrophe follows." "Keep them out." " [growls]" " Attention, area-fifty-something," "Coverton here." "There is no need to panic" "Regarding the rapidly approaching meteor." "We aliens have got your back." " They gave him the mic?" "They never gave me the mic." " And while I have the mic," "I would like to point out that" "Monsters drool, aliens rule." "[laughs]" "Coverton out." "[microphone feedback]" " Drool not, fellow monsters." "I have done it." " Ordered a pizza?" " We will have sweet, sweet revenge" "Against coverton for his cruelty." " Unless he really hates pizza," "This does not seem like much payback." " Ah!" "[air sputtering] - yeah." " A whoopee cushion?" " No, no." "That's too crude." "It's a whoopee cushion with stealth mode." "[air sputtering]" " Next-generation pranking." "Killer!" " Classy, guys." "But I don't think pranks exactly advance the cause" "Of getting on the president's good side." " We don't get blamed if we don't get caught." " Indeed, and with b.O.B. Preoccupied," "The odds of inadvertent disaster are greatly reduced." " And in this case, preoccupied means?" " B.O.B. And I are playing" "A friendly game of hide-and-seek." " Except you're not seeking." " Oh, so "preoccupied"" "Means b.O.B. Could be anywhere right now." " Completely unsupervised." "Yeah, that usually guarantees disaster." " Maybe b.O.B. Picked" "A completely harmless place to hide." " Whoa!" "Kind of a rough ride." "[laughs]" " [growls] - vornicarn, down!" "It is fuel tank, not intruder." " Even if we split up," "I would have to put odds of finding b.O.B." "Somewhere between hopeless" "And utterly hopeless." " Don't sugarcoat it or anything." " Hey, I lose stuff all the time." "Last week, lost my phone." "Dialed it, hamper rang, phone found." " That would not work" "Since b.O.B. Swallowed your phone." " B.O.B. Swallowed my phone!" " ¶ uh-oh, uh-oh" " Yello, susan's phone." " B.O.B., it's susan." " Not likely." "If you were susan," "You would be calling me on susan's phone," "Which you are not since I'm holding susan's phone." " Okay, look." "You're using susan's phone," "But you're not susan, right?" " Yeah." "Where are you going with this?" " Well, I'm not using susan's phone," "But I am susan." " Susan!" "How you been?" " Yes!" "I've located the cell phone." " Uh, got to call you back, susan." "I'm being pumped into something." " What is b.O.B. Doing on the launchpad?" " Being pumped into?" " The rocket!" " Fueling sequence engaged." " [laughing]" " Would you care to do the honors, mr." "President?" " You bet." "We are go for launch." "Clear the launchpad." "All:" "Ungh!" " What the?" " Coverton has given strict orders:" "This is a no-monster zone." " As promised, another flawless team alien operation." "Beep!" " Launch in t-minus 30 seconds." " B.O.B. Is doomed!" " No, he's not doomed" "As long as he has friends like us." " And?" " How about a swim?" " Launch in t-minus 20 seconds." "[rapid beeping] [exciting music]" " Hey, sta'abi." " [gasps]" " Who's an alien-killing machine?" "Is it you?" "Is it you?" "Are you an alien-killing machine?" " [growls]" " Have at it, vornicarn." " Hello." " Greetings, bug head." "You wish to challenge sta'abi?" " If only, my dear." "Sadly, you are about to leave in a rush." " Bye!" " Well done." " No problem." "Just get b.O.B." " Of course." "I'm in!" "[screams]" "I'm out!" " Ignition." " Whoa!" " We have liftoff." " [grunts] [grunting]" " Aw, you found me." " Agh!" "[quirky electronic music]" "¶" "Sweet tooth." "This rocket's trajectory is all wrong." "It's time for the monsters to save the planet." "Won't take but a moment." " He did what?" " That cockroach put in his own coordinates." " Hmm." "Which means what exactly?" " That rocket does not blast that meteor out of the sky," "We are doomed!" " I see." "[high-pitched screaming]" " Shall we?" "[triumphant music]" "¶" " [growling]" " [screaming]" " Ow." " [growling]" "Boom!" " Susan!" "Nice landing." " All part of the, uh, plan." " I'd like to be briefed on this plan." " Isn't it obvious?" "Sabotage." " Actually, it appears" "The monsters have averted earth's destruction." "[explosions]" " Cheerio, big ned." " Monsters for the win!" " What?" " Coverton's unique blend" "Of arrogance and incompetence" "Prevented him from seeing his mistake." " [gasps] - hah, burn!" " [sighs]" " Permission to jiggle while yelling yay?" " Permission granted." " Yay!" " [giggles]" " But, general, you can't" "Ow!" " Why don't you take a seat, dude?" " Allow us lucky beginners to help." " I am not through here." "I will be heard." "[air sputtering]"