"Part Five" "Are you crazy?" "You will starve yourself to death." "Forgive me." "nor marry you." "You haven't stood like this all night?" "I have." "How sensible of you." "Won't you drink some tea?" "Will you have no dinner?" "I told you I wouldn't." "Forgive me." "Do you think you are frightening me?" "You can stand here and eat no food." "How frightened I am!" "Don't you feel any resentment against me?" "You are quite resentful at others." "Against you?" "Have you studied history?" "I haven't studied anything." "Do you know who is the Pope of Rome?" "I've heard of him." "He was very angry with a certain Emperor. till he should be forgiven." "And did the Emperor spent all the time vowing vengeance against the Pope?" "He did." "then you are doing the same." "And I will take it out of me"." "I don't know." "Maybe." "How come you don't know?" "I don't." "then? and I follow you with my eyes." "and my heart sinks. what you said." "I thought of nothing all last night. twice." "And you never thought that you had attacked me?" "Maybe I did." "What if I don't forgive you?" "What if I don't marry you?" "I will drown myself." "You'd murder me before you drowned yourself." "I'll marry you not because I'm frightened of you." "anyway." "How can I do it better?" "I'll be a faithful wife." "or worry." "You are not a flunkey." "I thought you were no better than a flunkey." "You are not." "No." "Pavlofsk." "June." "Old Princess Bielokonski provides most comforting news about that queer young prince." "She found him in Moscow." "He made an extremely favorable impression." "She invited him to visit her in the mornings." "and she is not tired of him." "I also inquired." "But the fortune proved to be not so big." "And the prince is not good at business. or just empty-handed." "And then? although half the claims were absolutely fraudulent." "There was no curing a fool." "But you approved of this particular fool's doings." "You begged princess Bielokonski to help him." "Nonsense!" "Who told you that?" "or Ptitsina already?" "Nonsense." "We won't receive her." "Aglaya Ivanovna!" " I've been waiting for you." " Why?" "Couldn't the prince find anyone better as his correspondent?" "Saint-Petersburg." "Wait for me." " Your Excellency!" " How do you do?" "Out!" "Get out of here!" "You shouldn't have!" "Just to show you respect." "He has gone to get his coat." "is he drunk?" " Never drinks in the morning." "He sometimes comes back drunk in the evening. because our mother died five weeks ago." "He ran off because it's hard for him to talk to you. and is thinking how best to do it." "when you have a new one?" "dragon-fly!" "she'll have convulsions." "Don't say that." "God bless her!" "my daughter Luboff. who died at birth." "This is my daughter Vera." "And this!" "I'm his nephew. for I have a determined character." "I want to be employed on the railway at 25 roubles a month." "He already gave me some money. as to lose the money." "You shouldn't have paid the bastard!" "I had to smarten myself." "I am really like a tramp." "Just look at my boots! and I promise to repay my debt in three months." "too!" "But he doesn't want!" "And he doesn't go away!" "I will not go away until I have got what I ask." "prince?" "but I think you are in the wrong." "I don't know this myself?" "But you don't know what life is!" "What he has been doing?" "How did he buy this house?" "if he has not cheated you and if he is not trying to cheat you again." "You don't believe me?" "This has not much to do with your affairs." "Lebedeff." "you can be business-like." "I have very little time to spare." "what is your Christian name?" "Ti-Ti-Timofey." " And?" " Lukianovitch." "He is telling lies!" "He's Lukian Timofeyovitch." "Why you lie about it?" "It is all the same." "Does the prince care?" "He tells lies simply by force of habit." "Is it true?" "I'm Lukian Timofeyovitch." "why did you?" " To humble myself." " What do you mean?" "I if only I knew where Colia was!" "no!" "I'll do it." "He spent the night here." "This morning he went after the general whom you let out of prison by paying his debts." "He probably slept at the hotel nearby." "or went to see the Epanchins." "He spends days out there." "he is either in the hotel or in Pavlofsk." "while you were away." "when he got back and even left his job." "Varvara married Ptitsin." "Gavrila Ardalionovitch came to visit them in Izmailovsky regiment." "Ferdishenko disappeared." "he's been drinking somewhere." "And you know about the General." "Best regards." "Totski divorced Alexandra Epanchin. and was to be carried off to Brittany." "He'll be fine with her." "I knew nothing about your home before." "Orphans... yes." "why I am here." "Your letter brought me here." "Lukian Timofeyovitch!" "Don't tell me lies." "Give up serving two masters." "Rogojin has been here these three weeks." "Have you sold her to him as you had done before?" "Tell me the truth." "He found out everything." "He did wrong to you." "He beat you?" "He did!" "He set a bloodhound on me in Moscow." " A terrible beast!" " Lebedeff!" "You seem to take me for a child?" "Is it a fact that she left him in Moscow?" "on the eve of their marriage!" "She slipped off to Petersburg." "Lukian!" "Say nothing to the prince!" "She is afraid of you." "She shows her wisdom!" "You brought them together again?" "how could I prevent it?" "I'll find out myself." "Just tell me..." " Is she with him?" " She is by herself. as I told you in my letter." " She is there now?" " Right." "Unless she has gone to Pavlofsk." "she says." "Only yesterday she boasted of her freedom." "A bad sign!" "It's a pity you're drunk." "not at all." "How is she?" "A woman who is seeking." "Seeking?" "as if she'd lost something." "The mere idea of her marriage disgusts her;" "It's an insult for her." "She cares as much for him as for an orange-peel." "treats him with fear and trembling." "She isn't talking about him." "They only meet when unavoidable." "He understands this!" "It must be gone through! violent..." "Deceitful and violent?" "She tried to pull my hair when I said something wrong!" "I tried to soothe her by reading the Apocalypse." "What?" "The Apocalypse." "I noticed that she has a liking for conversation on serious subjects." "For fifteen years I have studied the Apocalypse." "She agrees with me that whose rider holds a measure in his hand." "Everything is ruled by measure in our century." "All men are clamoring for their rights." "One measure of wheat or three of barley a for a penny. and all God's good gifts" "by pleading their rights alone." "The white horse comes next with his rider Death and is followed by Hell. and it impressed her." " Do you believe all this?" " I believe and explain it." "an atom in the scale of humanity." "Who respects Lebedeff?" "But in here I am equal to a noble man." "Such as the power of the mind! and my head aches." "Go to the country." "I am also going with all my children." " To Pavlofsk too." " Everybody goes there? so no wonder it is popular." "I'll stay in the lodge." " As to the villa..." " Let it to me." "I could tell you something that would interest you." "A certain person visits Pavlofsk pretty often..." " Aglaya Ivanovna..." " Enough!" "It's not my business." "Take care." "This is the hotel." "Take the luggage. he would be back by 3. and would dine there." "Your room." "Thank you." "Just arrived." "Parfen!" "it's all right!" "welcome. did you know that I was coming to Petersburg?" "I supposed you were coming and was right." "But how was I to know that you'd come today?" "Why are you asking? two eyes glared at me as yours just did." "Whose eyes may they have been?" "I don't know." "It was a hallucination." "Perhaps." "I often have them. when my fits were about to come on." "I like looking at that picture." "That picture?" "A man's faith might be ruined by looking at it." "So it is." " Shall you go abroad?" " I don't know." "we came up from Pskoff together?" "It was cold in the train." "You are staying here for long?" "I'm at home." "Where else should I go to?" "I guessed which was your house from one hundred yards." " Why?" " I don't know." "and I said to myself that it must be yours." "that this troubles me so much." "It was built by my grandfather." "used to live here." "It's dark in here!" "A very dark place." "Is that your father?" "Right you are." "Will you marry in here?" " Yes." " Soon?" "It doesn't depend on me." "and I will not interfere." "I didn't interfere." "That first time she fled to me from you and begged to save her from you." "These are her words." "Then she ran away from me." "You found her and arranged another marriage with her." "right? And I will never even come to see you again." "I've never concealed my opinion from you." "I have always told you" "I consider this marriage would be ruin to her." "and even more hopelessly." "I should be pleased." "But I have no intention of trying to part you." "You need not suspect me." "I told you before but with pity." "I think these are the right words." "You said then that you understood me." "But did you really?" "What hatred there is in your eyes!" "I came to relieve your mind." "You are dear to me also." "I love you very much." "Now I shall go away and never come back." "Stay a little." "I haven't seen you for long." "When you are not with me I hate you." "I could have poisoned you at any minute. there is no malice in my heart." "You don't believe me." "You are like your father." "You say you love her with pity." "I have no pity for her." "She hates me." "I dream of her every night." "She is laughing at me with another man." "She does laugh at me." "She thinks of marrying me as if she were changing her shoe." " She has disgraced me." " How?" "So you don't know?" "She ran away with you on the marriage-day." "You don't believe that she..." "She didn't disgrace me in Moscow with Zemtuznikoff?" "I know she did!" "After having fixed our marriage-day herself!" " Impossible." " I know for sure!" "Isn't she like that? but with me she certainly is!" "She looks on me as vermin. was simply to make a laughing-stock of me." "You don't know what a fool she made of me in Moscow!" "And the money I spent!" "And you can marry her!" "What will come of it all?" "I haven't been to see her for five days." "Afraid of being turned out." "I can't even talk of the marriage." "I steal past the house." "Once she saw me from the window." "She asked me what I'd do if I found she'd deceived me." "you know well enough." " Does she?" " Of course. but did not succeed." "And I beat her till she was bruised all over." " Impossible." " Possible!" "Lef Nicolaievitch?" " What do you think yourself?" " I can't think anything!" "I won't interfere with you." "I'll tell you this." "I can't understand your yielding her to me." "Don't you love her anymore?" "Why did you come post-haste after us?" " Out of pity?" " You think I'm a liar?" "but don't understand." "your pity is greater than my love." "You'll hate her afterwards." "and for all the torment you are suffering on her account now." "I don't understand why she marries you." "Your money?" "Nonsense!" "There must be some good reason for that. and some your good qualities." "when she married you." "Is it possible?" "As if anybody would go to death deliberately?" "How dreadfully you look at me!" "To water or knife?" "exactly because the knife awaits her." "You don't even see what's at the root of it all!" "I don't understand you." "Perhaps he really doesn't understand me!" "They do say that you are a..." "you know!" "She loves another man." "She loves another as I love her." "And do you know who he is?" " You!" " Me?" "!" "You!" "Didn't you know that?" "She has loved you ever since her birthday!" "Only she thinks she cannot marry you." "she says." "She's afraid of disgracing you." "She can marry me all right!" "if it were not for me!" "She doesn't do it because I'm scarier than the water!" "It is some malady of yours!" "All this is jealousy!" "You have exaggerated everything." "I seemed to know it." "when I was coming back to Petersburg." "I wished to forget all this!" "Good-bye!" "Come on!" " Do you cut pages with it?" " Yes!" " It's a garden knife." " Right!" " Can't I cut pages with it?" " It's new." "Can't I buy a new knife if I like?" "!" "I'm sorry." "I seem so absent-minded and nowadays ridiculous!" "I didn't mean to ask you any of these questions." "I forgot what I was to ask." "Take care." "prince!" "I'll show you the way. do you believe in God?" "How strangely you speak! many people are unbelievers nowadays." "As to faith..." "I had four conversations last week." "I met one scholar in a train and we were talking for four hours." "He doesn't believe in god." "He was speaking outside the subject." "and they don't speak on the subject." "they do. and a dreadful murder was committed there. and were going to bed." "One noticed for the first time that his friend possessed a silver watch." "and was a rich man." "But this watch so fascinated him that he couldn't restrain himself. "God forgive me!" "He cut his friend's throat and took the watch." "I like that! and soon observed a drunk soldier staggering about." "sir!" "You shall have it for four pence! I gave him four pence." "I could see by his face that and he went to drink." "I will wait awhile before" "I condemn this Judas." "Only God knows what may be hidden in the hearts." "carrying a baby in an hour." "for the first time." "I saw the woman suddenly crossed herself." "I asked her. when he sees from the skies that a sinner turns and prays to Him with all his heart." "This is what she said in which the whole essence of Christianity was expressed. the chief idea of Christ." "She may have been the wife of the drunken soldier. or acts of any kind." "It's something wrong here!" "And it will always be!" "They will always talk outside the subject!" "But what can we do..." "Good-bye." "Take care." "God be with you!" "Lev Nicolaievitch!" "Have you got the cross you bought from the soldier?" "I have." "Show it to me." "Give it to me." "What for?" "and you shall have mine." "You wish to exchange crosses!" "Parfen!" "That makes us brothers." "Let's go." "Mother!" "Prince Muishkin!" "We exchanged crosses." "He was like a real brother to me at Moscow." "Bless him as you would bless your own son." "let me arrange your hands for you." "yet she blessed you." "She wished to do so herself." "She can not attend services in the church." "goodbye." "We both must go." "Let me at least embrace you and say goodbye." "strange fellow! I'll not kill you for the watch." "take her!" "It's fate!" "Take her." "Remember Rogojin!" "Am I to blame for all this?" "Watch out!" "2nd class." "sir." "It's a sickness." "It's a sickness." "Rogojin told me I had been a brother to him." "That was what he said first." "What if he kills?" "My head goes round... that Rogojin will kill?" "Nastasia Philipovna left for Pavlofsk in the morning." "She may stay there for a few days." "Your name is?" "announce prince Lev Nicolaievitch Muishkin." "I understood." "Don't worry." "I don't believe!" "I don't believe!"