"Oh, the royal coach!" "Come on, Walter!" "Get her!" "Come on now." "Annyrose, Annyrose, look at these beauts." "Jemmy, they've torn it all up again." "People with doors don't have dogs in the parlor." "Look, I've promised you lodgings, haven't I?" "~ When?" "~ Soon." "Get your things and come on." "Proper lodgings." "You won't get a lot for those flowers I'll bet." "Come on, how much do you reckon, then?" "Uh-oh!" "Look out!" "Yes!" "Rats!" "Stop, stop!" "My roses!" "Look what you did." "Ratcatcher, give me those rats." "Not likely!" "I won them." "Do you know who I am?" "Who doesn't?" "I'm Horace, prince of Brattenburg." "~ Prince Brat." "~ What?" "What did you say?" "~ Prince..." "~ Nothing." "~ She didn't say nothing!" "~ Hand over those rats." "~ Now!" "~ Catch your own rats!" "I aim to sell these." "Walter, get him!" "Dear me, guv..." "Quick, run!" "Sorry, your Highness, the little bugger gave me the slip." "I'll track you down, Ratcatcher!" "Jemmy?" "Jemmy?" "Come on." "We've got business." "Come back with some money, old boyo, or don't come back." "~ Jemmy." "Annyrose." "~ Smudger." "He's got a new dog." "Eleven rats in three minutes." "~ Eleven rats?" "!" "~ Yeah." "So don't let Blind George fiddle you." "Thanks." "It's called gaming, not watching, gentlemen." "See to that." "More rats!" "More rats!" "More rats!" "..." "The sound is going to put me into an early grave!" "We've got to do something!" "Get me some more rats!" "Unfortunately, I don't need no rats today." "~ Is that so?" "I'll call back tomorrow." "~ Hold on!" "Hold on!" "Where are your manners?" "I didn't say I wouldn't look at them, did I?" "Oh!" "Oh!" "Sickly, peaked, the lot!" "Well, they'd faint at the sight of the hound." "Prime fighters." "Fisher's brewery rats." "Prime fighters?" "!" "And you want to grow up to be the king of the ratcatchers like your pop?" "~ Rest in peace." "~ Rest in peace." "~ Little Annyrose, she does look hungry...?" "~ No I ain't." "~ I'll give you tuppence and call myself a fool." "~ You'll give me tuppence each!" "And nothing less." "The prince himself had his eye on our rats." "The prince himself --- is that so!" "What have you been eating?" "You've been feeding her cauliflower?" "That'll do it!" "That'll addle you for the market!" "More rats, more rats!" "Nine pence." "~ You're trying to put me in the poorhouse." "~ We'll try to stay out of it." "~ Wait!" "Maybe she'll buy me roses." "~ Keep your flowers." "Come on!" "~ Where are we going?" "~ You'll see." "Ballads f or sale!" "Hear about the most horrible villain the world's ever known!" "Cuts up small children before they're full grown!" "Hold-your-nose-Billy and Cutwater, his friend." "If you meet them on the highway, your life you will defend..." "Hiding in the forest, they leaps out through them bones..." "You'll face a brace of pistols while they help you of your gold." "~ He gave me a shiver." "~ Come on, Scaredy." "Get out and don't come back." "Go!" "Can you believe that bloke?" "~ Mrs. Chestney, Ma'am?" "~ Is that you again?" "What do you want?" "We want to see lodgings." "I told you --- I've been saving." "I've got money." "All right, come on up!" "Go on." "~ Rent in advance, of course." "That's my policy." "~ We ain't said we'd take it yet." "~ Oh, Jemmy, I love it." "~ There's a view from the window." "~ You call that chimney a view?" "~ Can we stay?" "We'll take it 'til this Wednesday." "No running up and down stairs." "No shouting and no games." "Understood?" "There is a respectable house." "Is it true, Jemmy?" "Are we really live here?" "It's not much of a view." "We can't even see the river." "It's the best view in the world." "The sun's getting up." "So should you." "Hey, hey get off me." "What are you doing?" "Get off me." "I ain't done nothing." "He still smells strong enough to lift a Roman." "Where did you find him, in a sewer?" "Exactly, Molly." "~ What's the prince want him for?" "~ New whipping boy." "Poor lad!" "Leave me alone!" "I do not want these things." "I ain't wearing these." "~ Hold still, child." "~ I ain't staying here, neither." "~ My sister don't know where I am." "~ Walter!" "~ Let me go!" "~ Easy, lad." "Behave yourself, now." "~ You can't keep me here!" "~ Tuck in your shirt, child." "~ You again?" "!" "~ Ratcatcher, what's your name?" "~ None of your business." "~ His name is Jemmy, your Majesty." "~ I'm clearing out." "~ But you can't, Jemmy from the street." "~ You're my new whipping boy." "~ Not me!" "What's a whipping boy?" "When father wants me punished, he have you whipped in my place." "~ You mean they'll whip me instead of you?" "~ Of course. ~ Why?" "~ It wouldn't be proper to whip a prince...would it?" "~ Why not?" "I?" "The future king?" "I've never been spanked in my life." "And when you're whipped, you're to bellow, good and loud." "Understood?" "~ I'm not staying here." "~ Yelp and bellow." "Those are my rules." "Furthermore, you're to bow when I enter a room." "Yeah, pigs will fly first!" "Get off!" "You can't lock me up!" "I ain't done nothing!" "Let me out of here!" "But I ain't done nothing." "Jemmy?" "Jemmy, is that you?" "~ No, I ain't him." "~ Have you seen him, Smudger?" "No, I ain't seen him." "All I know is that that competition in this burg has become considerably less." "I can't find him anywhere!" "Look, you ain't me sister, and I ain't got time for tykes." "See?" "Time and rats wait for no man." "~ I assure you, he cannot possibly hear the peacocks from there." "~ Good, good." "Now this is a very delicate situation" "~ Lord Chancellor, I want no mistakes to be made." "~ There is really no need to worry." "King Philip's ambassador confounds me, Lord Chancellor." "He threatens me with war,... yet he brought Philip's court painter to do a portrait of the Queen Mother." "He encourages compromise, yet he assumes inflexible positions." "Yes, he's a very clever and a very demanding gentleman, Your Majesty... ~ but perhaps he's trying to throw you off balance." "~ I hope that is all it is." "Who dares to spy upon the king?" "Show yourself!" "~ Horace, what were you doing there?" "~ I wanted to remind you of our chess game today, Father." "~ I've been working on my opening." "~ I'm sorry, Horace, we will not be having our chess game today." "~ I have to continue ,y talks with the ambassador." "~ But you promised...!" "Leave us, Falconhurst, I'll join you in a moment." "Why can't you talk to the stupid ambassador some other time?" "Horace, you know we've had a continuing dispute with Cousin Philip about the borders between our two countries." "~ So?" "~ If I am to resolve our differences peaceably, it must be done quickly." "~ But you promised..." "~ Horace, you are NOT listening." "You always promise, and then you're too busy." "You are old enough to know that affairs of state take precedence over royal recreation." "Could we play tomorrow?" "Ambassador, welcome." "Will you walk with me in the garden?" "A pleasure, Your Majesty." "I am very pleased with cousin Philip, sending you along with the ambassador." "Everyone in Brattenburg has heard of your genius." "Oh, yes, and everyone has heard of the Queen Mother by Brattenburg, Your Majesty." "I was delighted when King Philip asked me to apply my poor talent... to strengthen relations between our two countries." "Well said, painter." "Horace, must you do that?" "~ I'm bored." "!" "Princes are supposed to be bored." "~ It's part of the burden we have to carry." "~ Father canceled out chess game." "Kings are not free to do everything they wish." "And tuck in your shirt." "The head, Your Highness." "I never do anything I wish." "Go and do it somewhere else." "You're driving me mad!" "Whatever is the matter with that child?" "Let me in." "I've got to see Blind George." "Ye'd better learn to fight rats, and fast." "And the same goes for the rest of me fine clientele." "~ You again?" "~ Blind George --- do you know where Jemmy is?" "Likely out making a pauper of some other honest entrepreneur." "~ I can't find him anywhere." "~ Well, he'll turn up." "I'll keep me good eye open." "Thanks." "What is that foul odor?" "Melady..." "~ Do you want some garlic?" "~ Mr. Bill and Mr. Cutwater... ~ Aye --- with the goods, too." "~ Been working, I see." "How much you give us for that?" "Well, it's a fair piece..." "Where do you think it was made, do you think?" "I do not know where it was made, sire, but it hatched for us in the Forest Lane." "~ And the original owner?" "~ He used to wear his head on top." "It made him a might muddled when we moved it." "Where is that infernal boy?" "Punctuality is the politeness of kings, but not always of princes." "True." "~ Are the new quarters to your liking, Your Excellency?" "~ Oh, yes, Your Majesty." "I can hardly hear the peacocks." "May I suggest we toast the Queen Mother... whose loveliness has inspired me to the highest standards of my art?" "~ A toast to the Queen Mother." "~ The Queen Mother!" "You are all too kind." "And to peace and tranquility in our two great nations." "~ To Rittenstein." "~ And Brattenburg." "~ How dare you?" "Where have you been?" "~ Helping the chef, father." "A dish in your honor, Your Excellency." "What is this?" "!" "A curious embellishment for a delicate negotiation, Your Majesty." "And one which does not carry the royal sanction, I assure Your Excellency." "We are deeply embarrassed." "Fetch the whipping boy!" "Fetch whipping boy!" "Come on, son, come on!" "You continue to try the royal patience, Horace!" "This time, you have thoroughly offended Royal Philip's ambassador." "And you know I won't stand for this kind of behavior." "Let me go!" "Where are we going?" "Six strokes!" "As Your Majesty commands." "What are you doing?" "You can't...!" "Let this be a lesson to you." "We have a kingdom to rule... ~ and it's time you understood your place in it." "~ Yes, Father." "Here's for your pains, Whipping Boy." "~ You didn't obey my rules." "~ I ain't springing no tears for you to go over." "~ You'll bawl rivers if I say so, Jemmy from the street." "~ Not by half I won't." "~ I'll have you thrown you back in the gutters." "~ Better there than here!" "~ I suppose you had all those fine nice clothes and..." "~ I had me friends." "~ Friends?" "In the sewers?" "~ More friends than you." "A prince doesn't need friends." "Open the door!" "Let me out!" "~ Give up, lad." "~ I won't stay here." "They can't force me." "Unfortunately, they can." "I'm Peckwith, tutor to His Royal Highness, for my sins." "~ And you're Jemmy, new whipping boy, are you not?" "~ Not for long." "Accept it, son." "You'll be well fed and clothed here." "You could have an education..." "But you don't understand, sir." "It's my sister Annyrose --- she's all alone." "She'll be worried sick." "Good morning, Master Peckwith." "I'm late again." "Six strokes, do you think?" "This once, I'll overlook it." "Now --- do you have your writing book?" "No, and I haven't even practiced my letters so that's 15 strokes at least." "Your Highness, one day, you will be king." "And you can't so much as write your own name." "What's the good of being prince if I can't get someone to write my name for me?" "~ Dismissed." "~ But I haven't been punished." "~ Dismissed." "~ That's all right..." "I'd rather go riding with my father, anyhow." "~ Dismissed --- that means you, too." "~ He can't even write his own name." "~ And you can, I suppose?" "~ Well, not so as to be proud... ~ but I did learn my letters with my Mom." "Rest in peace." "~ Rest in peace." "Do you expect me to believe that?" "A boy from the street who can write?" "She also taught me not to tell no lies." "Leastwise not to gentlemen." "Well, confound me, boy!" "You do know your alphabet." "Let me show you how to put those in the proper order." "~ Then you could write a letter." "~ Me?" "Who to?" "That sister you spoke of." "I'll see she gets it." "Can I put this in, so I'll know she can buy her vittles?" "Certainly." "I'll get some fresh paper." "~ Mrs. Chestney?" "~ Yes." "~ That's for Miss Annyrose." "I'll see she gets it, as soon as she nips back home." "What we have here, my dearie?" "Come into quite a fortune, haven't we?" "The slip of a girl won't never know the difference." "God helps those who help themselves, I always say." "~ Late as usual." "~ I can't be cross with you today, Horace." "I'm too happy." "I have been immortalized." "I'm looking forward to it, Grandmamma." "Gentlemen of the court of Brattenburg." "I reveal to you my masterwork." "The portrait of the mother of your country." "Presented as a gift of friendship gift from King Philip, by way of his distinguished ambassador." "~ Who is with us for this momentous occasion." "And now..." "A unique boy." "Once again, Your Excellence, please accept the apologies of this court." "~ Fetch the whipping boy!" "~ Fetch the whipping boy!" "~ 12 strokes." "~ 15." "And let this be a lesson to you." "~ I told you to yelp and bellow ~ Leave me alone!" "~ You'll yelp and bellow next time if you know what's good for you!" "~ Never, never, never, never!" "~ You will!" "~ Never!" "You are the worst whipping boy I ever had!" "Jemmy?" "~ Whoa, Dearie --- I've got a letter for you." "~ A letter --- all for me?" "~ Right tight, you'll notice." "Carefully sealed." "~ It has to be from Jemmy." "Nobody else knows I'm alive." "Would you read it to me?" "I never read other folk's mail." "I'll be needing your rent at the end of the week, Dearie." "You pays up or out you go." "~ Blind George, Blind George, give it a look for me." "~ This, you say?" "You want me to read this?" "Writing." "No good can ever come of it." "Who knows what's in here?" "You know, the Devil himself might have sent this." "Did you ever think of that?" "No, child, for your own good... ~ Can't you read?" "~ Of course I can read." "I can read the Lord's Prayer on the head of a pin if I'm of a mind to." "I get a pension from the King for not seeing, and that includes not reading." "~ Oh, please." "It is from Jemmy." "I know it is." "~ Oh, let's see here..." "Well, it says here..." "~ Why don't you use your good eye?" "~ Because I'm saving it." "It says, um..." "He ran off to the Sargasso Seam Jemmy has." "~ We don't have any sea." "~ Well, he took a boat downriver." "Jemmy can't even swim." "He's feared of the water." "Well, there's no need for him to be, with a stout ship under his feet." "Wouldn't I know that?" "Twenty years afloat I was!" "It says here that he'll be back one fine day with a fortune." "In the meantime, you are to get your sleep and eat your vegetables." "There you go." "You can't read." "God knows, sharper than a serpent's tooth is an ungrateful urchin!" "~ Sir, sir?" "Would you read this letter for me?" "~ Get away from me, you little guttersnipe." "~ Or I'll have the guards on you." "~ Oh, could you please?" "~ Sir, your handkerchief!" "~ Thief." "Thief!" "Here, I was thinking to hand it back to you, and none to clean it is, neither." "Cheeky little strumpet!" "She lifted my handkerchief right out of pocket." "I did no such thing." "It fell out." "I ain't fibbing!" "Well?" "Come along." "The king's justice takes a dim view of thieves." "I ain't no thief!" "Let me go!" "This is very impressive." "You had a good teacher in your mother." "~ Rest in peace." "~ Rest in peace." "Enter." "~ It's Prince Horace, Father." "~ Horace, what are you doing here?" "Why are you dressed like that?" "Shouldn't you be at your lesson?" "~ Look, Father, new boots." "Just like yours." "~ They're very splendid." "Wherever did you get them?" "You ordered them, Father --- from the royal bootmaker." "Yes, yes, of course I did..." "~ Can we go riding?" "~ Now?" "~ Please, can we?" "~ Not now, Horace." "There's much to be done." "~ This afternoon, then?" "Please?" "~ I'll have the Lord Chancellor put it on my agenda." "~ Promise?" "Without fail." "Four years in Waldbach Prison." "Next!" "~ Your first offense, I see." "~ No, sir, I never stole nothing in my life." "Confession is good for the soul, child." "I have been known to reduce sentence if only people would tell me the truth." "But I didn't nick that hanky, sir!" "We have a sworn affidavit here from a most substantial citizen that says otherwise." "Three years in Waldbach Prison." "But I didn't, sir!" "I didn't!" "Next, and quickly!" "Da Vinci's assumption was that if one could construct a winged apparatus... which had the essential qualities of a bird, one could duplicate the phenomenon of flight." "I have it, sir!" "I'm not sure if Mister da Vinci would approve." "But I suppose we should try it." "Let it go!" "Scientists must be daring." "~ Look, sir, look!" "It's flying!" "~ Indeed it is!" "Here, look at that!" "Come now, come on, my girl!" "I have to get down there!" "Let go of me!" "~ Jemmy, what is it, lad?" "~ It's Annyrose!" "~ That's my sister down there." "~ Hardly, lad." "Those are prisoners, judged and sentenced." "And on their way to Waldbach Prison." "Jemmy, I think our first flight was a great success." "Now, other designs of Mister da Vinci are much more elaborate." "Keep buffing them, Walter, until they shine like Father's!" "A message from His Majesty, Your Highness." "I'm sorry to inform you... that the press of events has obliged His Majesty to postpone your outing today." "~ But he promised!" "~ He did, and His Majesty regrets, but... he must ride with the ambassador to discuss counter-proposal on boundaries." "He promised...!" "Your Excellency, we'll ride by the river." "I hope you'll like the stallion." "Your Excellency." "Thank Providence you are unhurt." "Who is responsible for this?" "How could this happen?" "Goose grease..." "An insult to me, and an affront to my royal master, King Philip." "Your Excellency, once again, please accept our most humble apologies." "~ King Philip did not sent me to collect the royal apologies, Your Majesty." "~ Your Excellency..." "What I took to be the thoughtless conduct of am overly spirited boy seems to have a disturbing pattern." "~ Your Excellency, I can assure you it is pure coincidence." "~ That is of no consequence now." "Diplomacy has failed." "More drastic measures may be in order." "I'll return to my country immediately." "Come here." "Do you understand what you have done?" "You have endangered our entire kingdom." "I thought I was raising a prince." "~ Father..." "~ Silence!" "I am at my limit, Horace!" "There will be no whipping boy for you this time." "You yourself will be severely punished" "~ Punish me?" "~ Yes, You are willful, spoiled, and not fit to inherit this kingdom!" "not fit to inherit this kingdom!" "Now go to your chambers." "Clever of him to use his son like that to humiliate us." "~ It defies all conventions of diplomacy." "~ The poxy brat!" "~ Why did you bring that?" "~ Perhaps I can repair it." "The horse is really good." "~ Why are we stopping?" "~ Do you smell something?" "Stand and deliver!" "~ Highwaymen!" "~ And a pleasant evening to you, fine gentlemen." "Today is your good fortune." "You have been detained by them two world-famous paladins of the open road!" "Hold-your-nose Billy and Cutwater." "I give you me congratulations." "Now, if you would be so kind as to pass down some of that expensive-looking baggage, me good man,..." "Excuse me, sir." "Do you know who I am?" "I think not." "Whipping Boy!" "Wake up...!" "~ So there you are." "~ What are you doing here?" "I'm running away and I need a manservant." "Ain't going to be me." "Me sister's in Waldbach Prison, and I'm going to get her out." "~ Small matter to me where we go." "~ "We" ain't going nowhere!" "Now leave me be." "I know where Waldbach Prison is." "I'll wager you don't." "You stupid whipping boy!" "You'll never leave here without my help." "I know how to past the guards." "Well, bring the basket." "Quiet, he'll hear you!" "~ King's business, soldier." "~ Open up!" "How long we got to do this?" "I can't get me breath." "~ I think we're lost." "~ You told me you knew the way to Waldbach Prison." "~ So?" "~ That does it!" "I quit!" "~ From here on I can go faster on me own." "~ Wait!" "Stay here, I command you." "You command nothing." "I only went along because you said you could help me find my sister." "If your sister's in Waldbach Prison, she's a murderer or a thief." "She's neither one." "And you run away of your own self." "I command you not to leave me here alone!" "I command you not to leave me here alone!" "Do you smell something bad?" "Ow --- get your hands off me!" "~ What are you doing?" "~ I've got me another one, Mister B!" "~ Let go or I'll have you flogged." "~ Belt up, or I'll give you a cuff you'll never forget!" "~ Sparrows is all...food for pigs." "~ Let me go!" "Now, now, young sir." "A true gentleman of the road is my friend Billy here... but a stickler for good manners!" "You don't want to be taking the wrong side of him!" "~ Hold-your-nose Billy and Cutwater." "~ The very ones, young sir." "Famed in song, verse, and the annals of criminality." "~ Hey, they have some fine victuals." "~ Leave that alone!" "That's our lunch!" "La-di-da saddle on a fine beast, too." "Bright plumage for sparrows." "Mayhap we have ourselves a real prize here, Mister B." "What you'll have is your heads in a basket if you don't let us go." "I'm the crown prince." "And I'm the grand turnip of China." "We've topped a few ourselves, boy, so you'd better think on being more polite." "~ Polite to rogues, scoundrels, and thieves?" "~ You forgot "vicious murderers"." "But only in the line of duty." "Skin me!" "That there is the royal crest!" "~ I told you, didn't I?" "~ Oh, dear." "~ We stole it." "~ Aye, but first you packed a pretty picnic basket, hey?" "~ We stole that, too!" "~ I'm not a thief, I tell you!" "I'm Prince Horace,... heir to the throne of Brattenburg." "And if you know what's good for you, you'll bow down." "A word, Mister B. ..." "Aye --- if you try to flee, it'll go hard on you!" "~ The lad's tiresome enough to be a prince." "~ What suitable ransom do you think?" "His weight in gold." "Everyone agrees that's the usual ransom." "No more, no less." "90 pounds." "Oh, you're as good at measurement as ever was, Mister B. I count on your discernment." "~ 93." "~ Oh, you couldn't get a fairer verdict in church, says I!" "Mount up, lads!" "We got grand plans for you." "We'll be dog rich, we will." "I'm not going in there!" "I demand you let me go!" "Let you go?" "Not likely, boy!" "The first requirement for seeking ransom, Mister B., is a ransom note." "~ And that could present a difficulty." "~ Didn't we steal an inkwell once?" "Last night --- what we took off them toffs." "Paper..." "Pen, ink, wax." "The ones that had the painting of the lady and a horse...!" "I like that." "There's a more vexing problem, Mister B. Who's going to do the scribblement?" "We can't write." "Gentlemen born though we is, Mister B. nor I never did have much in the way of an education." "So, young sir, you'll write the ransom note." "I don't take orders from villains and cutthroats." "Now --- think of your poor old dad..." "He'd be very much obliged to know you're safe and hardy." "Now do us that document, or I'll shoot off a toe or two." "And then your fingers And then your ears, and then your nose!" "Mister B., Mister B., you're frightening the poor lad." "Now I'm sure that if we just talk to him real nice... ~ No, I won't!" "~ He can't write." "And crows don't caw." "Princes and the like are learned to write when they're tots." "Now hop to it, boy." "He's right." "I can't so much as scratch my own name." "~ Are you trying to pull the wool...?" "~ Give it to me." "I'll write it." "~ You?" "~ That's right." "My whipping boy's a wizard with letters." "Try him." "~ What are you thinking, Mister C?" "~ There's something amiss here." "~ The shipping boy writes but the prince don't?" "~ I smelt it right off." "They're trying to flummox us by taking each other's parts." "Now --- no more playing us for fools, you hear?" "Certain as eggs is eggs, you're the prince!" "Him?" "He's my servant." "An ignorant street boy!" "Ignorant?" "He can write!" "My whipping boy ain't got the sense of a gnat." "I'd be obliged if you sent him to the castle with the note." "So's I'll be shed of him." "You witless guttersnipe!" "How dare you!" "He's an imposter." "I'm the prince!" "Not a peep." "There's business being done." "Now what we want is Your Royal Highness's weight in gold." "That's exactly 93 pounds." "~ 93..." "~ Uh-oh..." "~ 87." "Exactly." "~ We'll stick with the 93." "Now: make it known to the King that we're desperate men." "You'll take the desperate measures... if you don't get the ransom." "That's the spirit!" "Tell him we're...dangerous men." "With reserved places in Hell, you might say!" "I refuse to be ransomed for a paltry 93 pounds in gold!" "My father'll pay far more than that." "You won't be ransomed no ways." "If we didn't have use of you to carry that message..." "I'd wear your head for a hat." "~ Perhaps there's a better plan." "~ You fool!" "Can't you see I've got their brains so muddled they'd turn you loose?" "~ I don't wish to go home." "~ This isn't some kind of lark." "If you stay here, they kill you." "This is a disaster." "Who knows what cousin Philip's reaction will be?" "Nevertheless, your compromise was well received by his ambassador, Your Majesty." "Lord Chancellor, the ambassador left here aggrieved and insulted." "I don't think he'll recommend any plan of mine to Philip." "~ What is it?" "~ Forgive me, Sire." "We've searched the entire castle." "There's not a sign of His Royal Highness" "~ The prince didn't come to his lesson, Your Majesty." "~ Is that so unusual?" "~ I'm sure you'll find him somewhere." "~ There's also a horse missing from your royal stables, Sire." "~ And I'm afraid the whipping boy's gone, too, Sire." "~ Yes, well, gentlemen:" "look again." "Children often hide when they're sulking." "I was a but harsh with Prince Horace yesterday." "I'm sure they'll turn up." "Now, where were we, the Chancellor?" "I do not know what move we should make next." ""Your obedient son, Prince Orris..."" "~ "Horace." ~ of Brattenburg." "Here..." "Here...what we took off one of them toffs." "The seal gives it importance." "~ Now you watch them boys." "They're slippery." "~ I treat them like they was my own." "Until we're ready to feed them to the bears." "~ Dog Rich!" "~ Hog rich!" "How are we going to keep from picking our own pockets?" "Too small...you stay if you want." "When Cutwater returns, you tell him I went up that chimney." "You'll leave me here alone?" "Your Prince?" "What were you saying?" "Where's the prince?" "~ My whipping boy is over there." "~ Where?" "Where is he?" "~ In the straw!" "~ Ah, you little blackguard!" "Come back here!" "He's only a whipping boy." "I'm the prince!" "Hold, you treacherous brat!" "Come back here!" "Stop and take your punishment!" "You don't stand a tinker's chance, boy." "I've got the eyes of a hawk!" "Nobody gives old cutwater the slip." "Whipping Boy?" "Jemmy?" "Bear!" "A bear...!" "Think." "Drop the basket." "Drop the basket." "Drop the basket!" "Come on!" "Come on!" "Quick!" "~ You're thick as a post." "How'd you get to be a prince?" "~ I was born to it." "~ And you pinched on me, too!" "~ You were going to desert me." "I should have let the bear eat you." "Open the gates!" "It's a royal horse!" "Easy now!" "~ I've decided to forgive you for deserting me, Whipping Boy." "~ I don't care in." "I'm on me way." "~ But I haven't dismissed you from my service." "~ I've dismissed myself." "~ Petunia?" "~ Watch out!" "Petunia?" "Petunia?" "Come to Betsy." "Petunia?" "Petunia?" "I've got some comb honey, Petunia." "May the devil take me...!" "~ We mean you no harm, Miss." "We're lost." "~ Are you lost coming from or going to?" "We're going to Waldbach Prison, to save me sister Annyrose." "She's innocent." "Aren't we all?" "Well, it's that way through the forest." "Just follow the river." "~ We couldn't find the river." "~ You two are on the way to being hopeless." "It's where it always has been." "Between the trees there, just follow it." "~ Thank you, Miss." "~ Hold on --- whyever were you hiding like that?" "We were chased by some villains and then a huge ferocious man-eating bear!" "~ A bear?" "A dancing bear?" "~ Well, it wasn't dancing when we saw it." "~ It's over there --- having a picnic." "~ Our picnic." "Much obliged to you." "Petunia?" "I recognize the ink, the paper." "And look: the royal seal of King Philip." "~ I can't believe it!" "~ Sire, consider the language." "Did not the ambassador warn us of desperate measures... when he left us so abruptly?" "~ True enough." "~ And he has a well-deserved reputation for using headstrong tactics." "The conclusion is inescapable: the ambassador has kidnapped your son." "~ By why?" "Why would he ask for gold?" "~ To embarrass our sovereign." "To make a mockery of our kingdom." "He is using this as a provocation." "He has already intimated that King Philip is bent on war." "He made the poor boy write it himself." "What are you talking about?" "Horace didn't write that." "~ Of course he did, Mother." "Here's his signature." "~ Your son cannot write." "Why didn't...why didn't you tell me?" "Your Majesty, with all due respect..." "I tried." "Should I marshal the army, Sire?" "No." "Send out a patrol." "Try to intercept the ambassador before he reaches the border." "Let us hope cousin Philip has no part in this and there may yet be peace." "But above all: find my son." "~ Mister B. ..." "~ How come you ain't guarding them boys?" "~ They slipped way." "~ Say what happened." "~ Or I'll pull your arms off." "~ I'm here to tell." "A huge creature, Mister B., the most fiercesome I've ever seen..." "like a bear." "But much, much larger!" "More like a hippopotamus with fur, it was." "Cutwater, you skinny lying scum!" "Look!" "Look!" "~ Does it look like gold to you?" "~ More like trouble for the likes of us." "~ Them boys foxed us good." "~ And you're the one that let them run free!" "The only thing to do is get them again!" "Aye." "Only this time, we'll know how to treat them." "~ I'm hungry." "~ You're a prince." "Go order up a banquet somewheres." "~ And I'm tired." "~ And I'm tired of dealing with you." "Go home." "Look out!" "Soldiers!" "~ They're looking for us." "~ Looking for you." "They'll get me in the bargain." "Ain't you had enough of this running away?" "Why don't you just call to them?" "I don't want to go home." "~ I didn't know you could catch fish with your hands." "~ You would have if you'd asked me." "Get it, get it!" "I got it!" "~ I got one!" "~ This is better than eating them!" "I've got one, I've got one!" "~ Give me a hand." "~ What do you want me to do?" "~ Blow." "~ How am I supposed to know that?" "You ain't got the sense of a flea." "~ That wasn't a very nice thing to say." "~ What?" "~ That I'm stupid." "~ I never said you were stupid." "~ That's what you meant." "And just because I don't know how to make a fire, doesn't mean I'm stupid." "Look, I'm just trying to say that if you want warm clothes and a fish supper, you better give me a hand." "~ I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings." "~ It's OK." "What kind of fish are these?" "The kind you eat." "They're trout." "Now help me clean them --- or we'll never eat them." "Why do you think your sister's in Waldbach Prison?" "Not for doing no harm top no one, I can tell you." "We taught her right from wrong." "~ Who did?" "~ Me and me mom." "~ How come your mother doesn't get her out?" "~ Winter fever carried her away." "Rest in peace." "Mine was thrown by a horse." "Rest in peace." "Your father must be having a fit by now." "I might as well be stuffed and hung on a wall like a stag's head... ~ for all he notices me." "~ But you've got to go back." "You're a prince." "I might never go back." "This is the best time I've ever had." "You know, Mama, he's becoming quite a good chess player." "~ Who would have thought I'd miss him so much?" "~ I know." "~ Can't you walk a little slower?" "~ Can't you walk a little faster?" "~ Stop!" "Stop!" "~ Whoa!" "Who calls?" "Whoa!" "Sir, would you take a passenger, please?" "I need to get to Waldbach to save my sister." "Hop on up!" "Saving sisters is serious business." "I'm going to the market meself." "I'm selling God's most amazing fruit: potatoes." "Captain Nip's specialty." "These I have in here are the finest in the world." "Stop!" "Wait for me!" "Stop!" "Captain Nip." "Please stop!" "We left me friend behind." "Well, why didn't you say?" "We can't have that, can we?" "Whoa, whoa!" ""My friend"?" "Good lads, now the two of you." "Hop in back." "You won't harm the potatoes none." "They're tough as a sailor ashore!" "Quit your grinning at me!" "Dinner's up, ladies!" "~ Oh, what are you in for, Dearie?" "~ For not pinching a noserag." "Dinner!" "We get free food in here." "It's that grand?" "~ Come and get your slops." "~ I ain't eating... until they admit I'm innocent." "~ Hey, Gypsy, have you seen anyone like this on the road?" "~ What's he wanted for, sir?" "~ That's Prince." "Can't you read?" "~ No, no, more's the pity." "I never had the time." "But he can read the signs and all, you know." "~ Look out!" "~ Please, Your Worship, put away the firearm." "~ I did see the prince, now that you mention it." "~ Where?" "In the royal carriage." "Cuddles in his blessed mother's arms." "Why is it you can never get sense out of a gypsy?" "Because you're up there, Your Worship, and we're down here." "Witless fool!" "~ Whoa!" "~ Stand and deliver!" "Raise them high!" "~ And be quick about it!" "Remember, it's me they want, not you." "Stand and deliver, I say!" "Come on!" "Potatoes --- that's all I'm carrying." "Would you like them with salt or pepper?" "~ We're looking for two runaway apprentices." "~ Apprentice Highwaymen?" "There's always something new in the world." "Well look what's here!" "The young whipping boy hisself." "~ Well, where is he?" "Where's your master?" "~ I don't know." "~ You don't know?" "Come on, I'll shake it out of you!" "~ I don't know and I wouldn't tell you if I did." "Haroo --- here's the potato we're after!" "Come here, me young sir." "Come here." "That's enough now." "Man on mere boys." "You'll deal with Captain Benedict Nip of the Queen's Ar..." "~ Now what did you write in that poxy letter?" "~ I don't get your meaning." "You don't, do you?" "Well, you'd better begin to." "That wasn't gold coming out of your old fellow's castle --- it was soldiers!" "Soldiers!" "~ Which means no good for the likes of us." "~ I don't have nothing --- nothing to say." "I'm going to lay a whipping on you you'll never forget." "A word, Mister B. Now there's mayhap good reason that gentry don't whip their own." "They have reasons for everything they do, even though some are a mite peculiar." "~ Aye." "What do you think?" "~ Do what they do." "Whip the whipping boy." "Like the gentlemen we are." "Hey!" "Stop it!" "Put me down!" "Oh, what are you doing?" "Let me go!" "~ Let him alone." "I'm the prince!" "~ And he's the whipping boy." "You won't fox us again, young sir." "We know what's proper." "~ Why are you holding that boy upside down?" "~ Fits." "Gets terrible fits if we don't rush the blood to his head." "~ Shake him again, Mister B.!" "~ Have you seen the prince on this road?" "~ What's he look like?" "~ Like a prince, you fool." "~ You mean with a crown and all?" "~ Witless fool!" "~ Lay on hard!" "~ Stop, stop!" "Do not tell them a thing!" "I command you." "You command?" "You're not better than us!" "Put a bit more sting into it, Mister C. You didn't raise a peep out of him." "What's going on here?" "Go on, take them!" "Go on, cry out!" "I won't tell anyone." "Shoot it!" "No!" "Run, run!" "Yes!" "Good girl!" "Don't leave me here!" "Wait!" "You should have given them what they wanted." "And cried out!" "~ You never did." "~ Fair enough..." "Where are they?" "I'll beat them red and blue!" "I crush their coconuts!" "Blackguards!" "Where'd they go?" "~ Betsy, is it you here, darling?" "~ Yes, it's me." "You can rest easy." "Petunia ran them off, good and proper." "A happy thing for them they didn't contend with the Captain of the Queen's Own." "I'd have paid them back ten for one!" "I have here herbs and ogrun." "Let me treat where they put those stripes on you." "Sweet Betsy." "Light of my eyes!" "Where've you been?" "I looked for you at the fair at Grosport.." "I keep losing you, darling." "So marry me and you'll have potatoes every day for the rest of your life." "Don't be daft." "Excuse me." "I am grateful, but we got to get to Waldbach right away." "~ Is it straight down the road?" "~ Bless you, boy." "Aren't we all going there?" "~ Just past the cathedral, boys." "You can't miss it." "~ Thanks!" "Well --- we're here." "~ What do you want?" "~ Me little sister's in there." "I need to see the governor." "~ Well?" "~ Please, sir...me sister's only eight years of age --- and she's innocent!" "Innocent?" "Jemmy, let me see to it." "~ Open up!" "~ What now?" "I command you to allow us to enter." "I am your prince." "Prince of ragamuffins!" "Clear out!" "I'm the missing Prince Horace." "I demand you to let us in!" "Let my sister out!" "Annyrose!" "Annyrose!" "~ Jemmy --- we'll think of something." "I know we will." "~ I've lost my sister for good." "It's me own fault..." "~ I know a way." "~ Not likely." "I do." "I'll ask my father to pardon Annyrose." "A king can pardon anyone." "You'd do that?" "But you'd have to go back to the castle." "Royals cannot always do what it wishes." "Come on." "Come on!" "~ We need some silver." "~ What do you have for me?" "~ Nothing." "~ More of a nature of a loan betwixt gentlemen." "~ But what..." "What would this loan be for, might I ask?" "~ Horses." "Well, of course, of course." "I can see it would be embarrassing in your profession not to have any." "It wouldn't be impolite to ask what prospects do you have for repaying this loan?" "Not that I have any I doubts, you understand." "But what are your prospects?" "Show him, Mister B." "We had the young prince here twice in our hands." "But he gave us the slip." "But we aims to get him again." "~ The other lad here is his whipping boy." "~ Aye." "And we whipped him good, too, when the price gave us trouble." "~ You flogged this boy?" "~ Right, the whipping boy, yes." "It's a way to much him up, it is." "Gentlemen, this is the prince you whipped." "The other is a street boy from around these parts here." "We flogged the wrong boy!" "No greater offense there is in the kingdom." "Now if you wouldn't mind leaving, boys..." "I'd prefer to hang for something I've done." "~ We whipped the prince?" "~ Ah, Mister B., that's a good one!" "We flogged the prince!" "We flogged the prince!" "If that little rat tells his father, there's no place to hide." "But a prince has always got to return to his castle." "Now if we could be there to lay our hands on them... ~ And wring their cheeky necks..." "~ No one will ever know." "We do think alike, don't we?" "Ever since I got this shot in me smeller, I knew we'd make a fine pair." "~ I've never been so weary in my life!" "~ We're almost there." "Quick!" "I've got you now!" "Stop them!" "They're thieves!" "Hurry up!" "This way!" "Down here!" "Go on!" "~ They're catching up!" "I can hear them." "~ Keep running!" "~ Come on, Cutwater." "~ Right behind you, Mister." "B." "~ Not that one!" "Stop!" "No!" "That's the brewery rats." "~ So ?" "You're a ratcatcher." "Not these!" "Everyone's afraid of them." "They get big on malt and barley." "And they're real mean drunks." "I don't like this place." "How do you like hung, drawn, and quartered?" "No, they are hiding in the dark cover." "They're everywhere!" "Get them away from me!" "Hey!" "State your business!" "Look closely at me, soldier." "I'm Prince Horace, returned." "Bless me!" "It IS you...!" "Open the gates --- it's the prince!" "~ Open the gates!" "~ Open the gates!" "Prince!" "General, prepare my horse." "I ride with the advance guard." "We depart within the hour." "Falconhurst!" "I want an emissary to King Philip immediately." "Tell him that I expect my son to be turned over to me at the border, otherwise I will invade!" "I want no excuses, no delays!" "~ Horace?" "~ Hello, Father." "What have they done to you?" "I'll have their heads for this!" "Prepare for war!" "~ Without delay, Your Majesty." "~ Show no mercy to these kidnappers!" "But I wasn't kidnapped." "I ran away." "You ran away?" "I didn't think you'd notice I was gone." "But why?" "How could you possibly think that?" "I think I should know the answer to that question." "But you've come home now." "That's all that matters." "~ Father..." "~ No, no!" "I think I should send the soldiers home now." "What do you think?" "I'm sorry, Father..." "For all the trouble I've caused." "No, no..." "I'm sorry." "Because, you see, I'd forgotten what it's like to be twelve years old... and the son of a king." "With this treaty is the border dispute resolved." "Cousin Philip has agreed that it would be shameful for us to destroy what our fathers... took so long to create." "A point that seemed to have been lost upon his ambassador." "And now, bring me the young rogue who stole away our son in the middle of the night... ~ But Your Majesty..." "~ And brought him back a better son." "To a better father." "~ Nevertheless, bring me the whipping boy." "~ Father, he's my friend." "And the best friend you've ever had." "So there'll be no more whipping boys." "~ But what about my sister?" "~ I'm coming to that." "As a result of the obvious injustice that she has suffered..." "Annyrose shall be given a full pardon." "No...!" "No?" "What is this, Child?" "I don't want no pardon." "I'm innocent, and nothing less." "~ Very well." "I declare you innocent." "~ I accept, Your Majesty." "An unusual child." "I now proclaim you both members of the royal household." "Show them to the chambers, Horace." "Cor, lodgings!" "Come on, Annyrose..." "Proper lodgings!"