"'Two twos are four' ' story of ourjourney from a 2-wheeler scooter to a 4-wheeler car.'" "'By us, i mean the duggal family.'" "'Papa duggal, mummy duggal, son duggal and me, daughter duggal.'" "'Our car-buying story starts on the day papa received an income-tax refund.'" "' To celebrate, mummy was going to cook chicken for dinner.'" "' It was a mere refund, of our own income... and yet everybody was celebrating as if we had got a huge bonus.'" "'That month, the duggal family had rs 7,600 extra to splurge.'" "'Heated discussion was on, to decide what to buy with the money.'" "'This is how our family normally holds discussions.'" "We're not going to buy a dish tv or a fridge." "We're going to buy an ipod." "It costs rs.9,000." "What makes you so knowledgeable about it?" "Have you ever bought one?" "I haven't bought an ipl team either... but i do know that shah rukh khan has paid rs.4 billion for the knight riders." "Shut up." " You shut up." "You shut up." "We'll sell this cupboard, and get a new fridge." "That's it." "It's in excellent condition." "Even makes the right sounds." "Papa, dish... makes a racket all night." "Doesn't let me sleep." "Plug your ears with cotton." " Whatever!" "That's why i say, papa... make a wish get a dish." "No." "Ipod, ipod, ipod..." "we're going to buy an ipod." "What are you guys up to?" "!" "Stop this ruckus!" "Deepu, you idiot!" "You'll finish all the hot water." "'We hadn't even decided how to spend the refund money when the phone started ringing.'" "'Phones!" "The root of all problems.'" "'Always wrong timing.'" "Hello, santosh duggal this side." "Urmi." "How are you?" "How come, so early... 'urmi." "Papa's one and only real sister.'" "'We call her phupho (aunt).'" "' Phupho lives in meerut with her husband's joint family.'" "'She called to give us some explosive news.'" "Okay." "Fine." "Urmi's youngest sister-in-law is getting married." "On saturday." "Phupho's husband's youngest sister's wedding so its compulsory for all of us to attend." "Everyone forget about dish tv, ipod, fridge." "Money comes as refund money goes as wedding expenses!" "At least we won't have to fight any more about how to spend the refund money." "The refund won't be enough i'll have to withdraw from the provident fund as well." "You deal with that... chicken cancelled!" "You'll get squash and okra for dinner." "That's it!" "No!" "Okra and roti." "Not for me." " Jam sandwich for you." "You're spoiling him." "Bye, mummy... how will i spoil him with jam sandwich?" "The potatoes were not properly cooked yesterday." "Starting tomorrow, cook for yourself!" "Potatoes were not properly cooked, so be it." "Good morning, mr." "Farooqi." " Good morning, good morning." "2,1... 2,2... 2,3... 'whether it's the excitement of the income tax refund or the stress of going for the wedding at phupho's in-laws' house. '" "'No matter how complicated equations at home are once in his class, duggal sir forgets everything else and histheorems and formulae take over.'" "Quiet!" "You, you, you... both of you three." "Stand up." " Sir... stand up." "What's going on here?" "Oh... so this what you are up to!" "It's not mine, sir." "Belongs to aryan." "Sir, better give it back." "Want it back?" "Go take it from the principal." "But sir, his daddy will scold him." "Will he scold you?" "No he won't... because when he scores a zero his daddy won't say a word to his son but he will not spare me." "Collect it from the principal if you score 60%." "Or else, the principal will give you a suspension note instead of this gameboy." "And mind it!" "Whoever scores less than 60% in the pre-board math exam... less than?" " 60%." "Correct." "The principal will not allow those who get less than 60% to take the final exams." "Then, don't blame me." "I've been putting in time for the extra classes." "But if you don't work hard... where are you off to?" "It's an extra class, not compulsory." "If you study my dear, you will pass." "We'll pass, duggal sir." "You'd better worry about your results." "'While papa was making an effort to make his students attend extra classes.'" "'I was bunking the class at my college trying to get a free t-shirt.'" "Now, we'll have another prize round." "'That's my life.'" "' I have to do all kinds of crazy things to get a new wardrobe.'" "One question each to both of you." "Right answer... you win brand new puma t-shirts." "Wrong answer... no t-shirt, only bye-bye." "Okay, payal, first question." "Which was the last book that mickey read?" "Biology help guide, for the exams." "Mickey, correct answer?" " Yes." "Okay, mickey." "How much money is payal carrying right now?" "Sixty." " Can't be just sixty?" "Okay even if it's 160, i will treat it as right answer." "But, if it's more than that." "You won't get any t-shirt." "Payal, show me your wallet." "'Stupid mc!" "What a weird question!" "'" "'Lf i had shown my wallet in front of that crowd the entire college would have gotten to know how broke i was.'" "Not showing my wallet." "To hell with your t-shirt." "What's wrong?" "What's wrong?" "Your loss... go on guys, play some music!" "What difference does it make?" "At least, you could have gotten the t-shirt." "Makes a difference to me." "Because there's just 45 bucks in my wallet." "Not even 60, just 45." "Makes a difference to me 'cause, i've six t-shirts in my wardrobe and not one of them is an original." "And i need to take part in such stupid competitions for original t-shirts." "All because, my dad's income is peanuts." "Why does a teacher have to be my father?" "!" "Why couldn't your dad be my papa?" "Forget it, we don't want their t-shirt." "All lousy colours." "Here..." "lets go for a drive..." "it will cool you down." "Otherwise you will screw up your chemistry test and mine." "You son-of-a-jeweller." "Only one thing you have done right." "That i was born to a rich father." " Okay two things." "You also bought this car." "How many friends do have on facebook?" "'My brother, deepu.'" "'Sorry, he gets upset if you call him deepu.'" "'My brother sandeep or sandy.'" "' Difficult to say this is the same duggal sir's son... who gets all worked up by the news of a wedding in his sister's family.'" "Sandy... chill!" "They have scored a goal!" "Sandy... hello, kumar sir." "Sandy here." "Sorry, sir." "Yes, sir." "May i come over, sir?" "Thank you, sir." "Here, cash for your rickshaw." " And ice-cream?" "This for the ice-cream." "Bye." "Hello, mummy." "There's a test tomorrow." "Can i go to bunty's place to study?" "It's an english test." "How can papa help?" "Kumar sir is coming to tutor bunty." "I'll study along with him." "Calling from a phone booth, where else?" "Please, mummy or else i'll fail." "Love you mummy, bye." "Faster buddy." "'Dear deepu is a very hard working student.'" "'Just because, papa can't afford a tutor he goes to his friend bunty's house to study with his tutor, kumar sir. '" "He's out." "Just three balls left." "They'll lose." "Go on sandy, bet on it." "If they lose, you'll get five for one." "You'll regret it later." "Hit a four." "Singles won't help morons." "What say sandy?" "Bet 100 bucks on them, they'll win." "Just one ball to go." "They'll surely lose." "They'll win." "Here." "Sandy has bet 100 on a losing team." "Go, go, go, go!" "Sixer." "Yes, yes, yes." "We've won." "What's going on here?" "Who is he?" " Sandeep... sandy." "Justjumping with joy because he won the bet." "With kids you start behaving like one yourself." "And you... go dance with your mum." "Have you paid him his money?" "I was just doing that." "Were you the one who'd called me?" "Come here." "I said come here!" "If you ever do it again first i'll remove your name from the list... then i will remove your entire family." "Here's your money." " Thank you, sir." "When it's time to pay, we will call you." "Get that." " Yes. - now scram!" "'Kumar sir, deepu's tutor.'" "'We found out what he was teaching deepu and what deepu was learning from him only after a big crisis.'" "'Really, a very big crisis.'" "'But until then, deepu really had a ball.'" ""It comes and it goes"" ""it goes and it comes"" ""it comes from one hand"" ""it goes from the other"" ""money money pushy money"" ""makes us dance to its tune."" ""So you know, you better know,"" ""cash is a bossy goon."" ""You have no choice, you have to accept"" ""money's your dad, it's your mum."" ""It's a cup of tea..."" ""half full, half empty!"" ""It's a cup of tea..."" ""half full, half empty!"" ""It comes and it goes"" ""it goes and it comes"" ""pinching pennies every day"" ""every day penny pinching"" ""makes the heart burn"" ""which new move, which new trick"" ""will get rid of the crisis."" ""Let it fly let it fly"" ""let the tension bird fly."" ""Let it come let it come"" ""do anything you can but make the money come."" ""Feast in fantasy"" ""with pockets that are empty."" ""Feast in fantasy"" ""with pockets that are empty."" ""It comes and it goes"" ""it goes and it comes"" ""hopes:" "So high..."" ""desires:" "Only daring..."" ""dreams:" "All extra large"" ""pockets:" "Big gaping holes."" ""Big gaping holes"" "sir." "Sir." "Just a minute, sir." " Yes." "Sir, my sum is right why have you given me zero?" "It's right by fluke." "The method is wrong." "Is this the differential formula?" " Sir." "You should be careful." " Mr. Duggal!" "Still not giving up?" "Don't you have to go for coaching today?" "I'm on my way, mr." "Jolly." "I'm on my way." "Why do you make such silly mistakes don't repeat them again." " Sorry, sir." "What's going on?" ""Oh no!"" ""Oh no no no!"" ""Oh no!"" ""Oho noooo!"" ""It comes and it goes"" ""it goes and it comes"" "old creep!" "You fatso!" "Yes, it's me this side." "Do we have about rs.2,000-2,500 extra?" "How can i tell offhand?" "Need to see the accounts." "How can you not know?" "!" "You're so careless... yeah, right!" "I do everything carelessly." "All the cooking and cleaning just happen like that." "I suggest, you appoint someone else to do all the housework carefully." "And pay her your entire month's salary in wages." "Now don't get started all over again." "Apart from monthly expenses, there should be about 1,200 bucks." "It's just the 21st of the month." "I don't teach math, but i do know how to read a calendar." "Why do you need it?" "The scooter has been ruined." "I'll call you at the next red light, this one has turned green." "Hang on!" "I am moving, am i not?" "'Ccc." "Chatwal coaching centre.'" "'The owner of ccc, bsc.'" "'Bittu singh chatwal.'" "'Bittu singh chatwal, is short... ' '... but owns a big car, and an even bigger temper.'" "Mr. Chatwal, just one more week." "Listen to me." "He's been taking free coaching for the past 15 days." "Come here." "After passing the exams, he'll become an engineer." "And then you'll disappear." " No sir, we are very honest." "We give coaching, not charity." "Pay up the fees, take the coaching." ""Pappu can't dance..."" "why have you turned the class into a discotheque?" "!" "Duggal sir hasn't come yet nothing better to do than disco." "If duggal sir hasn't come why don't you practice math on your own?" "We didn't pay the fees to practise by ourselves." "Quiet!" "How dare you talk back!" "Duggi." "Duggal. - 'papa spends half his day at the school... ' '... and the other half at chatwal coaching centre.'" "' No indian teacher and his family can survive... ' '... on a school salary ' 'and papa wants us to go to the best school... ' '... where we will learn to speak fluent english.'" "'And the source of extra income to pay the high fees... ' '... of the best school..." "chatwal coaching centre.'" "Duggi, your students are singing..." "..."pappu can't dance..."" "all of them are morons." "There are much better songs, which they won't ever sing." "Duggi, get rid of this fossil." "Bittu sir, don't insult my scooter." "You want me to call it a bmw?" "Because of this scrap the entire day's schedule gets messed up." "Just a minute, bittu sir." "It will leave a bad impression on the students." "Anyway i can't get it repainted before the first of next month." "Forget about getting it painted." "Buy a new one." "Work double shift." "I work single shifts, and reach home at 9pm." "If i work double shifts, i will get home at midnight." "My kids will forget my face." "Looks much better now." "Yes, it's all camouflaged, let's go!" "Bittu sir." "Thank you, sir." "I got it from your office." "Bittu sir, i have one request." "No, no." "No leave before engineering exams." "Bittu sir, hear me out!" "There's a wedding in my sister's in-law's family." "Now using your sister for an excuse." "I'm not asking for an increment." "Just leave." "I'll work double shifts, sir." "I'll cut your salary for the leave and won't pay extra for the double shift." "Can we go in now?" "!" "Please!" "What a rascal!" "'Eventually chicken was cooked for dinner.'" "'Because phupho had come home, directly from meerut.'" "'Ln the morning, she gave some explosive news on the phone and in the evening she landed herself.'" "'Surprise visit.'" "'To explode an even bigger bomb!" "'" "All four of you will have to come and you'll have to come by car." " By car?" "And where will the car come from?" "Buy one." "Buy one?" "!" "It's a pointless expense, urml." "What are you saying?" "And the traffic is so horrible... it takes hours to get anywhere." "Scooters are the best, you can squeeze your way through any jam." "Do you even know the mileage of a scooter?" "I get at least 60-70 km/ltr." "'Papa's old list of excuses for not buying a car.'" "'When phupho insisted papa pulled out his favourite red file.'" "I'll show you my red file." "Wait." "Just wait." "'Lncome tax returns, salary slips, the monthly expenditure budget papa showed everything in the file to make his point.'" "'The red file." "The red signal for any of our expensive requests.'" "Fine, if you can't buy one, then rent a car for two days." "But you'll have to come in a car, that's it." "I know who has been brainwashing her!" "Who are they to dictate how we should travel... forget the scooter, if we feel like it we will travel on a bullock-cart why do your in-laws get bothered?" "If it's such a big issue, then we won't even attend the wedding!" "What will i tell my father-in-law?" "Tell him, your brother and his family were coming by a big car." "Better." "Tell them they were coming in a mercedes." "But, on the way a truck rammed into the car." "The mercedes was smashed and so was your brother's family." "What nonsense!" "Who'll believe that you have a mercedes?" "Fine." "So make us die in an ambassador car." "Even in death i don't get the honour of driving a mercedes." "Quiet!" "Phupho is crying." "All my sisters-in-law and their maternal families have cars... only my brother doesn't have one." "They taunt me each time, you come vrooming on your scooter to visit us." "If you don't come at all, i'll die of shame." "But if you come by your scooter they will torture me to death with the taunts." "Please save me." "Go on... eat your food." "He always bullies me just because i am younger." " Hush now!" "All of us will come for the wedding." "By car?" "Yes, by car." "Wha?" "!" " What wha-?" "Her in-laws keep taunting her in meerut and we do nothing sitting in delhi." "I'll see to it that this stops right now." "'Mummy made the promise to phupho.'" "'But left all the calculations to duggal sir.'" "'A gift worth 5,000, cash for the groom.'" "'New clothes to wear at the wedding and now the new hassle of renting a car.'" "Mrs. Diwedi." "Mrs. Diwedi." "Mrs. Diwedi." "Mrs. Diwedi." "Hello..." " hello need to go to the toilet?" " No." "You can, if you need to." "I'll keep an eye on the class." "Hey, no cheating." "Aditi, do your own work." "Mrs. Diwedi." " Yes." "I read in the papers, that service tax will be charged on taxis." "Your elder brother has a taxi business, doesn't he?" " Yes." "Very nice." "How is it going?" "Very nice, excellent." "Actually, last diwali he bought four new cars." " Really." "Even i've taken out some money from my savings and invested it... in the taxis... in partnership." "It's a good side income." "Mr. Duggal, these days a side income is a must." "Why don't you also start something?" "It's easy for you." "Mr and mrs." "Diwedi, double income." "Very nice." "And if anyone in the school requires taxi services then can they approach you..." " yes, of course." "I even give a teacher's discount." "Really?" "!" " Yes." "Mrs. Diwedi, if someone needs a taxi to go to meerut only for two days, what will be the rate?" "For meerut, we've a package deal of one night and two days." "For 5,400 rupees." "All inclusive." "For our fellow-teachers, it's only 5,000 rupees." "Five thou!" " Yes." "Why, do you need one?" "No." "I was just asking for general knowledge." "Okay." "If someone you know needs a taxi, then do let me know, mr." "Duggal." "Come on, come on time's up." "Time's up." "Sir, just a minute." "Please, just a minute." "This disgusting woman, rejected the love of her god-like husband instead chose to romance the postman." "This treacherous woman continued in her wicked ways... with the help of her boyfriend she made fake stab wounds on her back." "And then... every day you watch this nonsense." "Have you finished your homework?" "Yes, it's sanskrit." "Do you want to check it?" "Sanskrit!" "Watch discovery channel." "Watch history channel." "Always watching this rubbish." "Papa, it's news i'm watching." " Don't try teaching me!" "Lower the volume!" "And then she lodged an fir against her husband." "Now don't stay awake all night." "All the car-rental stress will any way not let me sleep." "Minimum rental charges are 5,000." "You should have thought more before you made your big promises." "Now you don't have to taunt me." "I couldn't bear urml's despair." "But if you can't arrange for it, then just call her." "We won't go." " That's not possible." "You have given your word." "I have to honour that." "I will think of something." "We would've never faced such a situation if you hadn't made me quit my job." "17 years ago... 17 years ago, your income was more than mine you could have become the head librarian by now." "I know!" "Go to sleep." "The head librarian is entitled for an official car, with a driver." "Sorry." "I couldn't fulfill your fantasy of roaming around in an ambassador car with a hunky driver." "They give an esteem car these days." "No more ambassadors." "They might be giving japanese cars, who cares." "Don't bother me." "Go to sleep." "Blank... kusum." "Kusum." "Stop sulking, here read this." "What lousy handwriting." " You're missing the point." "Go on read it." "Dear respected sir, please give me passing marks." "For the marks that you give me, ...my daddy will pay you a proportionate amount of money." "For example: 20 marks is equal to 20,000 rupees." "One thousand rupees for one mark." "Please call on 9821611674." "Thanking you, sincerely roll no. 1393." ""Beware of this scoundrel..."" "deepu!" " "Don't go by his innocent face, behind this face is devilish rogue."" "The things these people do." "Aren't they afraid?" "What if they get caught?" "Is it a very big risk?" " Go to sleep." "'Don't misjudge my papa and mummy.'" "'For important things like electricity, water, telephone ration, they are not averse to paying bribes like everyone else' 'they are just too scared to accept it themselves.'" "'Scared of getting caught!" "'" "'They didn't have the courage to take money for giving marks... ' '... but they still had to arrange for a car, to go to meerut.'" "'Both of them kept tossing and turning all night.'" "'I don't know what complicated mathematical solution papa was trying to come up with.'" "'But mummy came up with a brilliant idea.'" "Mr. Farooqi." "Good morning." "Good morning?" "Good morning, good morning." "Good morning." "I always walk to most of my destinations." "But nowadays to buy milk you travel by scooter or car to buy veggies you travel by scooter or car." "Everybody has become slaves of their vehicles." "That's why i say, every child should receive army training." "You know, urml..." " the one who lives in meerut?" "Yes." "Her younger sister-in-law is getting married, in meerut." "Congratulations, mr." "Duggal." "We'll surely attend the wedding." "Does the card have only my name or does it say, mr." "Farooqi and family." "No, that's not what... no need to be formal." "Inflation has shot up like crazy." "If they invite even one member from each family then there'll be so many guests." "We need your car." " Car?" "Why?" "What's the problem?" "Urmi's sister-in-law..." "wedding... trip to meerut." "Two days, saturday and sunday." "This weekend?" " This one." "One that's coming up." " Coming up." "Tomorrow and the day after." "Right!" "Oh well... it's your car, you can take it whenever you want." "See, i told you." "But i need to get it repaired." "You'll be travelling on the highway." "If it breaks down, i'll feel bad." "Babu mechanic will deliver it back next week." "Then you can take it to agra, why only meerut." "Your younger grandson has to be admitted to school this year." "Right?" "But why should you worry duggal ji will get him admitted just like he got your elder grandson admitted." "Isn't it?" "He really values your family a lot." "He never bothers about anyone else's admission." "Do you even know what the other teachers are up to?" "!" "They charge at least 150,000 for arranging admission into nursery." "They have turned it into a business." "How very sad!" "You need the car only till meerut, isn't it?" "Meerut is almost delhi now." "It will get there without any hitches." "You take it." "No, but if you're insisting that we can't go then we won't go." " No, it will go." "Of course, it'll go." "Take it." " Now that you are forcing us... what say?" "We can't hurt your sentiments, farooqi." "Thank you very much, i'll come and collect the keys." "Where are they?" "He's testing." "Wonderful." "Wonderful." "I'm so proud." "You are an amazing driver." "Here." "Drive as carefully on the highway." "Thank you." "Thank you very much, farooqi." "Why are you sitting in the front, kusum?" "Sit at the back." "I'll sit in the front, i'll have to keep an eye on the road." "Let the driver keep an eye on the road, please." "Sit down." "Or else, farooqi might change his mind." "Oh... ok!" "Where's deepu?" "Deepu!" "Don't worry, farooqi." "We'll be back soon." "I won't go if papa sits at the back." "Quiet, wear your hat and pull up your pants." "Get in." "Duggal." " Sorry!" "Come on." "Take good care..." "look after it." "Don't leave it all alone... duggal." "It's allah's gift..." ""so what if the horse is borrowed."" ""Once mounted, we are kings"" ""so what if the dress is borrowed"" ""now we are wearing it, we are dudes"" "don't roll it down!" " Enjoy the fresh air." "What a foul smell." "It's freezing!" "We'll all turn into ice-cream." "Broke it." "Not done... farooqi on the phone." "Fix it, quickly." "And you drive slowly." "Hello, farooqi." "Everything is fine." "The car is also fine." "Don't worry." "Everyone thanks you." "Hey!" "Wake up!" "Enjoy the scenery." "Potato." " Potato." "Potato paratha: 15, cauliflower paratha: 18, cottage cheese: 45... cheese... 45!" "Alright, get me a plain paratha!" "Alright... i'll have potato as well." "Get me cheese." " Cheese?" "No cheese." "Cheese is 45!" "And the cheese here is not good." "It's not safe." "We're all having potato parathas, you also have potato." "He'll also have potato." " Yes, sir." "What's wrong with him?" "Where are you going with the keys?" "Are you planning to starve?" "Gosh!" "Farooqi again!" "Yes, farooqi." "No, that sound is not from the car." "We're at a roadside eatery." "It's all the background noise here." ""Pappu looks like a foreigner."" ""Foreigner."" ""Rado watch on his hands, and gucci perfume."" ""But pappu can't dance..."" ""below the blue sky..."" ""but pappu can't dance..."" ""the nature spreads it's love."" ""But pappu can't dance..."" ""below the blue sky..." - "but pappu can't dance..."" "payal, stop the car." ""The nature spreads its love."" " Stop the car." "Stop, stop here." " Stop." ""Like this..."" "fighting like kids all the time." "Kusum!" " Why can't everyone chill?" "!" "Sorry." "Now come on!" "Don't get mad." "Say sorry." " Sorry, dude." "Why should i apologize?" " Say sorry." "Sorry mummy, come back." "Okay, you sit in the front, i'll sit at the back." "I'll sit at the back, you sit in front." "Come on." "Come now." ""Hope no one finds out"" ""the feet are too small for the shoes"" ""hope no one finds out"" ""the grandeur and style are fake."" ""So what if the horse is borrowed."" ""Once mounted, we are kings"" ""so what if the dress is borrowed"" ""now we are wearing it, we are dudes."" ""So what if the horse is borrowed."" ""Once mounted, we are kings"" ""so what if the dress is borrowed"" ""now we are wearing it, we are dudes."" "Thanks sis-in-law for helping me save face... thanks." "Let it be." "The boys will move it." "Rabinder, gajender, come here." "Move this junk." "Speed up, you lazybones!" "Come, santosh." " Is he an aamir khan fan?" "Hey gajani, who will park this?" "Santosh, you never said anything about buying a new car." " Not new... no father-in-law, it's not new any more." "My brother thought of giving us a surprise." "It's a wonderful surprise." "Well done, well done." "Last time, you came here tired and sweaty." "I felt like telling you, why do you always come vrooming on that old scooter." "Buy a car." "But i felta bit awkward saying it." "So i didn't say it." "Mr. Bajaj, come here." "Meet urml's elder brother." "He's a professor in delhi." "Urmi, show them their rooms." "Let them freshen up." "Lets go, mr." "Bajaj, we've got loads to do." "Urmi." "Get them something to eat." "Indu, manju!" "How are you?" "Kiddoes, you don't remember them!" "They are phupho's 'famous' car-owning sisters-in-law." "You look tired." "If the car is nice, the journey is never tiring." "Right?" "They are so jealous to see the car." "What's going on, urml?" "New car, professor... why all the lies?" " Have you lied?" "No, you haven't?" "Relax!" "You haven't committed any sin." "It's not about committing a sin." "What if they discover the truth?" " It's just a matter of one day." "You'll be leaving tomorrow morning." "Can't you control yourself for one day, for me?" "Papa." "Please chill." "We've come in a borrowed car, and they have declared you are a professor." "Imagine, if we had come in our own car they would have appointed you vice-principal." "You can joke about it all you want." "But i've a very bad feeling about this." "Somehow the wedding should go smoothly, that's it." "Now what do you want, walking all over me?" "!" "Stop you thief!" "Stop." "Whose car are you robbing now?" "This time i catch you, you will be gone for a long time." "Fa... roo... qi." "Farooqi?" "Yes?" "Oh yes, yes." "Thank you." " Santosh." "Why are you hanging around with the ladies?" "What's that rubbish you are drinking?" "Come have a real drink." "Come with me." "Urmi, you didn't get flowers!" "Keep your hair back." "Why is it always so messy?" "Why are you dressed in your school uniform?" "For the wedding you should've dressed up... some decent clothes... phupho." "Help!" " Kusum?" "Just one bracelet, you should have worn some bangles." "Phupho." "Help!" "Santosh, this is mr." "Katiyar." "He organizes all the tents used in meerut weddings." "Hello." "This is prof." "Duggal from delhi." "He is urml's elder brother." " Okay." "What took you so long?" "Were you getting all the thieves and dacoits of meerut arrested?" "No such luck." "Some even followed me here." "Has some farooqi come here from delhi?" "I don't know any." "Can't say about the bridegroom's family." "But what has this farooqi done?" "No, he hasn't done anything." "Some thief was trying to steal the poor man's car." "Did he manage to steal it?" "Am i a good-for-nothing inspector?" "No way rawat!" "Nothing can go wrong when you are around!" "Please call farooqi." "His car is in the middle of the road." "Rab!" "Gaj!" "Come here quick." "Go look for this farooqi." "Give the car papers to him." "Are you farooqi?" "Are you farooqi?" "Farooqi?" "Farooqi?" "Your friend just asked me." "Rab gaj did you find farooqi?" "!" "We're looking for him." "Farooqi?" "Farooqi?" "Farooqi?" "Get lost." "There is no farooqi here?" "Mr. Sharma, i tell you this is becoming a big mess." "What should we do?" "The wedding procession is about to arrive." "What am i there for?" "You take care of the guests." "I will take care of farooqi." "Owner is missing." "No one is coming forward to claim it." "You check if it is listed under stolen vehicles?" "And inform the bomb squad as well." "I heard you are looking for me, commissioner." "Inspector, not commissioner." "Who are you?" "The owner of the car." "Farooqi?" "I had gone to the bathroom." "You would've been in big trouble." "I had even informed the bomb squad." "Now park it properly." "It's blocking the road." "And listen, take the papers." "What's the registration number of the car?" "Car... dl it's delhi car... dl..." " dl what?" "It's dl something." "Dl..." " dl." "Dl." "Come here." "We will together try to remember the number." "You don't even know how to drive." "What would've you told farooqi if i wasn't here to help?" "Don't you owe me one?" "Sure, sir." "I am at a loss of words... you have thanked me enough in words." "No harm using your hands." "Yes, of course." "Thank you very much, sir." "You are the teacher, why do i have to teach you everything?" "I am just a teacher, inspector." "Please, do try to understand." "Basic and allowances... all add up to rs.8,000 per month." "You make money from tuitions as well." "I know." "Not the envelope." "That's rs. 5,001." "I am not asking for any more than that." "What i will get from you, will go into my son's tuition." "You don't understand." "This is for the bridegroom." "How do i know you haven't stolen the car?" "Should i call mr." "Sharma?" "We will find out everything." "No, no." "That will be a disaster!" "Look, my younger sister her sisters-in-law, they all have cars... why should i care about sisters-in-law?" "Hey listen, call mr." "Sharma here." "No, don't." "Uncle!" "What happened?" " Get lost." "Not you." "Not you." "It's a tough job being a cop." "Not as easy as teaching take one or two classes and relax the rest of the time." "Mr. Sharma respects me." "Anyway, 5,000 is more than enough for me." "You can keep the change." "Go on, take it." "No hard feelings." "Next time, you borrow a car make sure you remember its number." "Now move along, the wedding procession must be arriving." "Tyagi, cancel the bomb squad." ""Is the bride a beauty"" ""or is she ugly and snooty"" ""he will marry her, only after seeing her face."" ""This condition, the groom has laid."" ""Without the music without the horse"" ""without even tying the knot"" ""the groom has barged into the bride's house"" ""making a big mess."" ""He is trying to sneak in." "Hiding in a corner"" ""he looks like an ace thief"" ""jumping over the walls..."" ""the crook talks nonsense..."" ""why is the bride going crazy"" ""over this stupid moron?"" ""Without the music without the horse"" ""without even tying the knot"" ""he looks stunned..." " oh yes"" ""he looks dazed..." " oh yes."" ""He is surely a goon..." " oh yes"" ""he is surely a rogue..." " oh yes."" ""The groom looks pale"" ""where has he been?"" ""Everyone's been searching for him." "Where has he been?"" ""So what mischief has he been up to?"" ""Whose lock did he break?"" ""What new mess has he made?"" ""Everybody should get to know."" ""He is in for a thrashing"" ""if the groom is trapped."" ""He is in for some whipping"" ""if the groom is trapped."" ""Without the music without the horse"" ""without even tying the knot"" ""watch out for that"" ""sharp kohl."" ""Is it her beauty"" ""or is it a long sword."" ""What a dress!" "How ornate!"" ""In each lock of hair"" ""are at least four guys trapped."" ""The bride is a flower in bloom."" ""The groom is a trash can."" ""A fairy is paired with a monkey"" ""how bizarre!"" ""The bride and groom are in a trance"" ""the rest of the world can rot."" ""Without the music without the horse"" ""without even tying the knot"" ""the groom has barged into the bride's house"" ""making a big mess."" ""The bride and groom are in a trance"" ""the bride is cute the groom is a dude"" ""love has exploded"" ""their eyes are glued."" ""It's a party!"" ""Let the world go and rot."" "Goodbye!" " Santosh, your presence added so much life to the wedding." "I'm so happy you could come." "Bless you." "Do come again in your car." "This is a gift from the bridegroom for all the sisters." "Thank you." "And this is for you." "No need for me." " I will take mummy's as well." "Thank you so much." "I love you, sister-in-law." "Bye." "Tata, tata!" "Three thousand for you." "And three thousand for me." "That makes rs.6,000." "What did i say... it comes in one hand and goes from the other." "Now we can get your bangles back, kusum." "Mr. Farooqi." "I mean mr." "Duggal." "Don't forget the car's number?" "Papa, how does he know uncle farooqi?" "You pull up your pants." "It's not even been a year and you have ruined their bottoms." "Who will buy new pants for you?" "Your father?" "Yes, who else." "Stop, stop." "The shop is right here." "Neel gagan jewellers." "Sunday closed." "Sunday closed!" "Let's go." ""The sweetmeat was tasty until yesterday."" ""Tasty." "Tasty."" ""It has become bland now."" ""Sweetmeat"" ""sweetmeat, sweetmeat, sweetmeat, sweetmeat."" ""Sweetmeat, sweetmeat, sweetmeat, sweetmeat."" ""The sweetmeat was tasty until yesterday."" ""It was so tasty."" ""It has become bland now."" ""The mare which we rode earlier."" ""It will kick us now"" ""come on."" "Hang on payal, i will guide you." "I'll manage, papa." " You will need guiding, i'll do it." "Move aside, deepu." "Come on." "Reverse it." "Come on." "Come on." "Keep coming." "Keep coming." "Keep coming." "Keep coming." "Steer left..." "left... keep coming." "Good, very good." "Papa." "What happened?" "Is there a calamity?" "Where are you off to with that beaming face?" "What has happened?" "Tail-light and bumper gone." "But there is no dent." "What happened, arora?" "Poor farooqi loaned his car to duggal and he has gone and wrecked it." "You should drive a borrowed car carefully." "Yes." " That's why we never borrow anything." "How much would it cost?" "Duggal, you should have driven it yourself." "It's not a toy that you give it to your children." "Why are you all butting in?" " Payal, please." "Why shouldn't they..." "otherwise you will sneak off." "Now don't pass personal remarks." "We will pay for the damages." "Who will let you go without paying!" "Who is going anyway?" "I had told you not to lend them our car." "But generosity is always bursting out of you." "Look, now the tail-light is busted." "It will cost around 5,000 to fix it." "Why are you complicating things, uncle arora?" "500 for the tail-light, 1,000 for the bumper with labour included it'll be 2,000 max." "It's a car and not your papa's scooter." "As if you have bought a lot of lights." "I haven't even bought an ipl team, but i know... deepu, both of you, go upstairs." "Come on." "Papa, look how they are... go home." " They are so rude!" "I said, go up!" " Payal." "Payal, take the keys." "Go." "Go." "I am very sorry, farooqi." "Look at that!" "Washing his hands off with a sorry!" "Sorry won't cover the damages." "Enough of this bickering!" "Here's the money... for repairs." "No, i will send the mechanic with the bill." "You pay him yourself." "When she is paying in cash, why don't you take it?" "Count it!" "It's rs.6,000." "You can keep the balance after paying for the repair." "Let's go." "Don't show off money.6,000." "You have made a business out of arranging school admissions." "Don't i know from where you are getting this money?" "!" "If you are making so much then why not buy your own car?" "Why come running to us to borrow our car?" "Stop it!" "That's enough." "There will be a car parked outside my house in the next 15 days." "I swear!" "Relax, duggal." "We have done the settlement." "Which car are you planning to buy?" "Do give us a treat, soon as the car is delivered." "Enough guys, don't needle him." ""What about them?" "How duggal growled at me... me a woman."" ""If anyone says anything to his brat of a daughter, he will coming charging."" "Didn't you hear what i said?" "We too are buying a car." "Your wish is coming true." "Jump around, sing and dance." "Your favorite song "paapu can't dance"" "you know it all the rent, their fees, medicines household expenses, dvd and tv." "...our total income is 20,000 and expenses are 24,000." "Always in the negative... where will the money come from for the car?" "The down payment will be approximately 40,000-50,000." "The monthly installments will be about 3,000-4,000." "How will you pay for it?" "I haven't bought the ipl team but i know." "Now we all will be insulted because of you, papa." "I am going to bunty's house." "I have a history test." "I was parking the car on my own." "This mess wouldn't have happened if you hadn't interfered." "The car we anyway won't buy... but now salma will make life miserable for me after 15 days." "So i am the villain!" "Everybody will be humiliated because of me!" "Take it easy." "We know our limits." "But i am saying that we will buy a car." "Don't my words hold any value?" "Will i have to prove myself to my own family?" "Fine then... now no matter what happens." "The duggals will own a car." "Wait and watch!" "'The hood is up, this cobra is ready to attack!" "It will spew venom!" "'" "'After the break, we will show you its next deadly move.'" "'Don't move.'" "'Don't change the channel.'" "'Keep watching. 'kaha suni.'" "Has anyone seen my glasses?" " How long will you take?" "Is it my fault we live in this tiny flat with only one bathroom?" "It's such a small house four people live in it, and no one has seen my glasses." "Check in the pants you wore yesterday." "'Life went back to normal.'" "'By the next morning, we had all forgotten... ' '... about farooqi uncle's car's incident.'" "'But papa made us remember it all over again.'" "Now i remember!" "God help us!" "I left my glasses in farooqi's car." "Deepu!" "Payal!" "Go get my glasses from farooqi's house." "Gotta rush." "Test today." " I will miss my bus." "No one is willing to help me?" "Now chill." "We've been insulted enough yesterday." "You don't go to their house either." "Better if you buy new specs." "Please." "More damage!" "Don't tell your wife about it." "My wife will come to know." "She is insisting on not returning your glasses till the car is repaired." "I must thank your wife, farooqi." "If she hadn't created the ruckus i would have never had the courage to buy a car." "So which one are you going to buy?" "Babu, your mechanic, was saying that he will get me a nice second-hand car." "Second-hand?" "!" " Yes." "Duggal, don't go for a second-hand." " Why?" "Banks don't sanction loans easily for a second-hand car." "Moreover, they will charge double interest." "It's a car-engine, not an algebra equation that you will be able to figure it." "It will work fine during the trial." "Afterwards, it will be stuck in the garage with the mechanic." "Really?" " Drop the idea." "No, no." "I have made up my mind." "Where will you get the money?" "It's no use buying a second-hand car." "You cannot afford a new one." ""Are you back with the milk?" "!"" "Oh no!" "Payal, come on." "I will drop you." "Papa, you carry on!" "Just listen to me... papa, how many times have i told you not to ask me to ride on the scooter." "I will take the bus." "There is only one or two weeks left before the car comes." "Then you won't get a chance to sit on the jumbo-jet." "You go on yourjumbo-jet." "You don't believe that i'll get the car, do you?" "When the car is delivered, parked in front of our house then i will believe it." "For now, please leave." "Okay." "Fine." "Off i go on my vehicle!" "Like the car will ever be bought!" "Stylish, smart, safe, value for money and indian, sir." "Sit in the car, get a feel." "You will look ten years younger." "You will look 50." "I am 51." " Really, sir?" "You look 41." "Actually i was looking for that one... - that one!" "The complete family car, sir." "Spacious, luxurious, hassle free value for money and indian, sir." "On-road rs.338,000 only, sir." "What happened, sir?" "Any problem?" "There is no problem." "Don't you have a nano?" "Nano?" "It's a nice car." "Their showroom is right next door." "Join the long queue to register for nano." "Your turn will come in a year or two." " A year or two?" "!" "No, i want a car in 15 days." "Okay don't you have... maruti 800 - 800, sir!" "800." " This way... good choice 800, even now it's every neighbour's envy every owner's pride." "But soon 800 will be history." "What if i get you an alto for the price of 800?" "Alto for the price of 800?" "!" "Rohan motors brings a special scheme, sir." "Dealer's discount." "Free insurance." "And accessories worth rs.5,000." "Only for you." "But only till the 31st. - 31st?" "!" "Just five days left to 31st." "That's why don't delay, just drive it." "You will yourself say, alto." "Payal will drive, not me." "Payal?" " Payal is my daughter." "Your daughter." " Yes." "So you'd like to test drive with your family?" " Yes." "No issues, sir." "I will come to your house with the car." "You will bring the car to my house?" "!" "Of course, sir." "You leave your address with us." "I will come to your house with the car." "Thank you for your assistance." " Sure sir." "Thank you." "Alto." "No way." " It's no ordinary car." "It's better than a maruti 800." "We don't want better, we want the best." "Mickey's car is the best." "Mickey's car costs 90,000 more than alto." "Ipl, you shut up." " Where will we get the extra 90,000 from?" "Good enough that we are somehow managing to buy a car." "She is never happy." "Sourpuss!" "Yay!" "Papa is buying a bullock-cart." "Everybody clap!" "Kusum, talk some sense into her, or else... i will die, but i won't ever sit in that car." "Yes, don't." " Yes, i won't." "You never should." " I will not!" "Ready for test drive?" "Alto?" " Alto!" "Wonderful." "No, you drive." "We will test it from the backseat." "Buzz off alto!" "Come on payal." "Come down." "Okay, then we are going." "Bye!" "Bye!" "Strange kids you have, kusum." "First time we go for a test-drive, one is sulking upstairs the other one went off to sleep." "Get up." "Please confirm it." " It's final." "I will prepare the papers and call you." " Okay, sir." "Thank you very much." "Thank you." "Yes!" " Argh!" "'Mummy had sulked when the cooler was bought. '" "'Deepu sulked when we got the tv.'" "'And papa... when we bought the fridge.'" "'Now, that we are buying a car, it's my turn to sulk.'" "'Whenever something new is bought in our house... ' '... invariably one of us has to sulk.'" "I love you." "I love you." "I love you." "I love you." "I love you." " We too have an alto." "Mom uses it for veggie-shopping." "Veggies!" "It's cool to go on a date too." "Payal dude!" "Oh wow!" "Oh wow!" "Oh wow!" "Oh wow!" "Where did you get so much money?" "Did your parents buy it for you?" "My parents!" "They have never even bought a car for themselves how will they buy one for me?" "Monthly installments from my own hard-earned call-centre salary." "I too want a call centre salary." "Then come along..." "you too can get a job." "Is it that easy?" "Yup... walk-in interview, walk outjob." "'Allms to lit." "Allms to airport." "Allms to lodhi road.'" "'The traffic is flying on these flyovers.'" "'But its slow-moving at pahardganj... ' 'because the cops have raided a hotel here... ' '... to arrest betting king kumar.'" "Sandy." " Shut up. - 'the cops have found phone numbers which will lead them to other betting-ring members. '" "Stop." "Stop." " Why stop?" "Stop the rickshaw." " 'And the police is looking for the rest of the gang members... ' - stop the rickshaw!" "'" "Sandy." "Listen, sandy." "Stop it, sandy." "Sandy, you are a psycho." "Stop it, sandy." "Sandy don't break your phone, your parents will scold you." "What's wrong?" "Let's go." "Let's go." "Let's get out of here!" "Go on, move... have you also gone psycho!" "Stop." " Let's go. - stop!" "You witch!" "What nonsense." "What happened?" "Do you have to go to the loo?" "You had gone for your tuition, hadn't you?" "Mr. Kumar didn't turn up?" "Did he ask for the tuition fee?" "Deepu, are you alright?" "Do you have fever?" "Let me check." "Leave me alone!" "Then tell me what's wrong." "I have a stomach ache." "Let me sleep." "Whatever!" "Mummy!" "Papa!" "Who opened the lid?" "Involved in betting, are you?" "!" " No!" "No!" "No!" "Tell me where have you hidden the money?" "Planning to buy an ipl team?" "Want to become a millionaire?" "Pull up your pants!" "Loser." "Oh no." "Don't open the door." " It's papa." "Come, come in." " Why shouldn't she open the door?" "My dear, i am home." "Come on!" " Where?" "Sit down." "I have to tell you something important." "I am tired." "Papa, i have got a job." "Job?" "Yes a job!" " Deepu... where are you going?" "The fish!" " Sit down." "I will give you something to eat." "Payal duggal got a job." "Starting salary is 10,000." "And after three months, 25,000." "Per month?" " Per month." "Call centre... what is this?" "She had gone to a call centre where her friend geetu works." "Walk-in interview, walk out with a job!" "Deepu!" "Where are you going?" "They are hungry." " You sit down." "I'll feed the fish." "Now, with your salary and mine put together... we can buy the car of my choice." "That's good!" "Very good!" "Work all night dark-circles under your eyes face all worn out you will look 35 at the age of 25." "Good!" "Then we won't need to worry about your marriage expenses." "Isn't that why you are so happy, kusum?" "Nobody will agree to marry her." "Go on, you make your plan to buy the car." "You are saying no, papa?" "You are saying no, papa!" "What's wrong with that?" "Everyone's working in call centres these days." "'Cause if she works at a call centre all her life she will be saying, 'how can i help you?" "'" "'Sorry for the inconvenience.'" "Hundreds of them start everyday and as many shut down!" "Look dear, if you don't have a degree in hand you won't get a job in any place other than a call centre." "First you finish your b." "Sc." "Then do an mba." "Then you think about doing a job." "Fine!" "Fine!" "Thank you." "Papa you are so... i know papa so bad, mamma so good... we know that." "What the!" "What is this?" "So much money?" "My dear, now that's very shrewd of you!" "What have i done now?" "All this saving!" "We can pay the down payment for the car with this." "Not mine... i keep my savings in the rice-box." "Deepu?" "I was about to flush all the money, papa." "Please, save me." "I am very sorry." "Police will come and arrest me." "Hang on!" "I don't understand!" "What did you say?" "Papa!" "'Betting king kumar.'" "'This brute trapped innocent children.'" "'Who are the parents of these children... ' '... who let their innocent kids get trapped?" "'" "'After the break, we will show you... ' '... the extensive network of this criminal.'" "'Don't move.'" "Oh, my god." "I don't believe this." "You idiot." "You moron... i don't know him." "Is this what you have learnt at school?" "You punish him." "You beat him up." "Calm down." "Calm down." "First we have to get rid of this money." "Deepu, this is a lot of money!" "'Papa got on the scooter and made deepu sit behind him... ' '... and quietly left with the betting money.'" "'Deepu was a nervous wreck!" "'" "'Scared, about the punishment papa would give him.'" ""Papa made deepu distribute every single penny of the betting money among the street children." "That's papa!" "He is weird, his punishments are weirder!"" "I've given away all the betting money." "Give me some for that kid." "Hey!" "That's a 100-rupee bill!" "Bye." "Let's go!" " Bye." "Are you still scared?" "No." "Now i'm hungry." "She just kept screaming 'psycho'!" "She was after my money..." "not a real girlfriend." "Why are you sad?" "That was just a rehearsal." "You'll finally get a real girlfriend." "But at the right time." "You didn't scold me even once, papa." "It was my mistake." "Why should i scold you?" "I didn't even realize when you grew up, and became sandy." "I didn't even know you have a girlfriend until recently you were sucking your fingers." "Papa!" "We would apply bitter oil on your fingers." "...bitter-gourd water and once, we even tried chilli powder." "But you still wouldn't stop." "You would cry, wash your hands and carry on sucking your fingers." "Then one day you just gave up on your own." "Now tell me, what do we do about betting?" "Oil?" "Bitterjuice?" "Chilli powder?" "Or you will give up on your own?" "I am sorry, papa." "Very sorry." "Two cheese parathas... two potato..." "two egg, two cauliflower two mince parathas..." "takeaway!" "Here's your change." "Come on people, don'tjust keep hogging, pay for your food." "Pay up." "Deepu was hungry so we stopped to eat parathas." "Yes, we are coming." "Yes, everything is fine." "Let me drive... no you can't... it takes time." "I... papa please - all right!" "Yes, on the way." "Sulking won't fill her stomach." "Tell her i am getting cheese parathas for her." "Careful!" "Oh yeah!" "Oh yeah!" "The car of my choice." "Oh yeah!" "Oh yeah!" "The car of my choice." "Yes we are buying the car of your choice but you don't ever talk about working until you finish your mba." "Promise?" " Promise!" "Not even once." " Not even once!" " Good girl." "Hey wait!" "These documents are for the car loan." "Drop them off after college." "Okay?" " Okay." "Hang on!" "There are originals too, for verification don't lose them." "Be careful." " Okay." "Oh yeah." "Oh yeah we started with the car at 2,500 per month installment... - yes." "Then we jumped to 3,400." "Now it's a leap to 3,800!" "Only 1,000 extra will be deducted every month." "And the down payment?" "That has sky-rocketed as well." "I will swing it... you earn!" "You splurge!" "This is hardly splurging... after the betting kumar incident, i have learnt a lesson." "Just paying the school fees does not make me a good father." "A father's duty is to make his kids happy." "And in that, there should be no discount!" "It's my oil massage that has made you so clever." "You are spoiling my hair." "I have to ask for a loan from the principal and bittoo chatwal." "Listen to me." "Pay the fees by tomorrow or else... bittu sir." "I need three months' salary in advance." "Advance?" "What advance?" "Sir, i need to buy a car." " Hold your ears." "Now do sit-ups!" "Have you checked and submitted the answer-sheets?" "Just a few are left, sir." " Please work faster, mr." "Duggal." "Sir, it'll be done by monday." "Sir, the advance payment..." " i said hold your ears!" "You earn such a meager salary, mr." "Duggal." "Three months' advance is hardly enough." "Are you really going to break your fixed deposit for the car?" "!" "Okay you'll work double-shifts to pay for the monthly installments but what about the down payment, duggi!" "You don't get it in private schools." "If you wanted an advance payment you should have gone to a government school." "Duggi, all the funds have already been budgeted." "You asked for a blackboard, didn't you?" "I have approved it." "You're a senior teacher." "We can even bend the rules for you but sanctioning an advance for a luxury item is not ethical." "Income tax agents will start making enquiries!" "Any of your enemies, at school or in the neighborhood will get a chance to lodge a report." "How did a teacher manage to buy a car with his salary?" "You'll be stuck in jail for 3-4 years." "A teacher should not buy a car." "Follow my advice..." "buy a new scooter." "And for that, start a double-shift today itself." "Cool then?" "So what if you're a teacher?" "Aren't you allowed to have any desires?" "Aren't teachers allowed to have any dreams, desires?" "But you must not suffer in pain if some desires cannot be fulfilled." "You must do power yoga." "Shouldn't you have first figured out how will we get the money for the down payment?" "I had." "I was confident that i'll get my three months' salary from the employers who i have worked for for the last 20 years." "Oh, my god!" "Forget about the car of my choice now we can't even get an alto." "Why?" "If teachers can't buy a car, then how... who said teachers can't buy a car?" "Who said that?" "I'll show you how a teacher can!" "I'm not a failure." "Oh charan!" "Come in." "Got all the detergent packets?" "Counted them?" "One thousand, aren't they?" "What's all this?" "Car!" "Car!" "Third prize food-processor!" "Second prize home-theatre!" "First prize car!" "Cut the packets." "Pull out the slip." "Look for the first prize car." "We will win a car!" ""When the iron is red hot"" ""go on, strike!"" ""When the oil of dreams is on the boil"" ""go on, fry your dreams."" ""When the iron is red hot"" ""go on, strike!"" ""When the oil of dreams is on the boil"" ""go on, fry your dreams."" ""If the fate has got punctures"" ""lts time to glue and fix them."" ""Two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""Think wisely, be careful."" ""See properly,"" ""you might get lucky."" ""Take a chance"" ""roll the dice"" ""make your move"" ""then wait and watch"" ""you might get lucky"" ""it slips away"" ""it eludes"" ""if you grab it"" ""ltjumps and flies away"" ""catch it, trap it"" ""tighten your fist"" ""hold onto your dream."" ""Two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""when the iron is red hot"" ""go on, strike!"" ""When the oil of dreams is on the boil"" ""go on, fry your dreams."" "Even if we don't win a prize, at least we will have enough stocks for the entire neighborhood to wash clothes... last one." "It's the last one!" "Wake up gang!" "The last one!" "Yes." "Who's going to cut it?" "My hands are shivering." " You cut it." "Not me." "Till now i haven't won a single prize in the thousand packets... give it to me." " I'll cut it!" "I haven't won till now cause i am destined to win the first prize car." "Sit down." "Now sit down." "Hang on!" "One sec!" "I had even applied probability to calculate that out of the 1,000 packets, even if we don't win a car surely we would win an expensive prize which we could have sold to get the cash for the down payment." "I knew we wouldn't get a carjust by cutting the detergent packets." "You won't even let me take up the call centre job!" "Hey!" "Don't start playing the call centre tune again!" "I'm going to sleep." "Don't wake me up." "Yes!" "Go to sleep!" " You forced me to quit my job." "Now you're not even letting her work." "You don't have to take on all the responsibilities." "Let payal work." "Give me the telephone number for charan's shop." "It'll take us two months to repay this debt." "I won't let you push us into any more losses." "Fine, i'll get the number myself." "I'm not a failure!" "Remember that!" "Call centre, huh!" "I'm not a failure!" "It's not a joke to be a math teacher!" "Where's my diary?" "Where's this charan?" "Here it is!" "Why is the diary all tattered?" "!" "Kusum!" "Why did i make the promise to urml in the first place?" "!" "I have told everybody at the college we are buying a car." "The prize is in one of the answer sheets and like a fool, i have been searching for it in detergent packets!" "Do you remember the roll number of the one who was willing to pay 1,000 for one mark?" "Will you make the call?" " Yes." "Do you remember the number?" "Of course i do." "His birthday!" "1st march, '93. 1... 3... 9... 3!" "1393!" "Brilliant!" "You should have been a math teacher, dear!" "1393... - fine, don't tell me any of your secrets!" "1393. don't get hassled!" "Here read this." "Dear sir, please give me passing marks, my dad will pay..." "thousand for each mark... oh yeah!" "What are you doing?" "Changing my voice to ask for money." "Don't do that!" "Why?" " Your number will still be displayed and traced!" "Call from the pco, at ito." "From the pco at ito..." " you're right!" "I'll go change." "Kusum, cup of tea please!" "Listen, are you sure we're not doing something wrong?" "I'm not giving him 100 out of 100." "I'm just giving him passing marks." "And anyway, whether 1393 passes or fails he's going to enjoy life with his father's money." "But my children will be stuck with a scooter." "Those who have been taught by me... engineers, mbas earn starting salaries of 150,000." "I'm 51, but i don't even have a dinky car." "There are flyovers being built everywhere." "All of delhi is furiously moving ahead like the metro but we are stuck where we've always been." "Everyone is buying cars but if a teacher's family wishes to buy one then we are questioned a hundred questions." "Why shouldn't we have a car?" "No." "We're not doing anything wrong!" "And don't feel guilty even for a second!" "Why would i feel guilty?" "...i just asked to make sure you are not doing this under any pressure." "I've been to the toilet early in morning." "Why would i now feel any pressure?" "Yes?" "Santosh duggal this side." "Yes, we're buying a car." "We'll need a loan too." "Where did you get my number from?" "Okay." "No, i'm going out for something important right now." "No, after my work is done." "Call me up in the evening." "Mention not." "Many thanks." "Offering a car loan." "With it a credit card too!" "Free!" "You are my hero!" "Best of luck!" "My 1... 3... 9... 3, happy birthday!" "Good luck, payal!" "Good luck!" ""The sea's bullying."" ""Makes the bubbles angry."" ""The sea counts cash."" ""While the bubbles remain paupers."" ""Oh the sea's bullying!"" ""Without the madness"" ""without a goal"" ""there's no excitement life is a big hole."" ""Tighten your pyjamas."" ""Pull up your pants."" ""Go bust the sea"" ""make its life hell!"" ""Two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""Two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" "Phone!" "Phone!" " Who could it be now?" "Hello." "Yes, i will need a loan, but please call me in the evening." "I'm kind of busy right now." "Papa." "Let's go!" " Yes, i am." "Anyone will suspect us if we sit with just a glass of water." "Do one thing, order the non-veg burger." "Non-veg?" "!" "We are going to get 60,000, aren't we?" "We'll get some non-veg stuff packed for mummy and deepu as well, on our way back." "Why did you ask for 60,000 only?" "If i had asked for 100,000, would it have taken care of all our needs?" "I just asked for what we require now." "We'll sit at different tables." " Why?" "What if he gets jittery seeing an extra person?" "He didn't come across as the jittery type." "Even then... hello." "Yes, i do need a loan, but i told you to call me in the evening." "Yes, thank you." "These bankers..." "your phone." "Yes, mummy?" "No, we're at mcdonald's." "Don'tjust keep calling every minute, dude." "No, i'll call you when everything is done." "No, i don't want to talk to deepu." " Why?" "No." "Payal!" "Payal!" " Give it to me." "Hello, payal." "Payal!" "Moron!" "She hung up?" "You're so intelligent." "How could you let them go?" "Just watch this." "'Lt may seem like patients are given treatment here, that diseases are cured but hidden behind the spotless clinic walls is an ugly reality.'" "They conduct stings all day." "This is a doctor's sting operation!" "There are army stings, actor stings, politician stings!" "Papa got me out of the betting mess, ...but now he has got into one himself... they will just chew him up... 'and infiltrated the clinic of this killer for a sting operation!" "'" "There hasn't been a sting conducted on teachers as yet." "I'm going." "I have a very bad feeling." "Deepu!" "'Look at this man's innocent face.'" "'Don't go by the innocence. '" "'Behind this face is a dangerous criminal!" "'" "Chattar, negi." "Stay at the gate!" "Papa, burger." "Papa, burger." "Mr. Duggal." " Papa, burger." "Mr. Duggal." " Make this moron shut up!" "They're here." " Where?" "Where?" "Chill." "Chill." "Don't be scared." "I'm handling it, papa." "Good morning, sir!" "Sir!" "Good morning!" "Who are you talking to?" "Teacher sir!" "Good morning, sir!" "Is he the teacher?" " Looks like him." "Quite a scoundrel." "He's called others too." "Sir, i've been greeting you for so long." "Good morning." " You're not listening to me." "Good morning, sir." " Good morning." "You had called." "Oh, looks like there's a long queue." "We have to wait?" " No... no." "My work is done." " Thank you for saving my son's future." "I said call me in the evening, i am in the middle of another meeting." "You look very busy!" "I spoke to just one man." "He's my father." "Sit, father." "You sit." " Get lost!" "Give the chair, or i will thrash you?" "!" "He's my brother." "We are a business family." "All three of us go together for every deal." " Yes." "I spoke to you." " The student is my son." "And i'll see the answer-sheet." "Show me, how many marks have you given him?" "Aryan?" "Are you 1... 3... 9... 3?" "He is the one who has to be given passing marks." "We brought him along so that he can thank you." " Yes." "Why thank him when we're paying?" "Sir, you tell everyone in the class not to eat pizzas and burgers." "Now you're eating it yourself?" "Many other things are said in the classroom." "Every word is not to be followed." "Come on, let's see the answer-sheet." "Mr. Duggal." "Duggal sir?" "Zafar." "Zafar Iqbal, 1994 batch." "I was in your class." "Bluffer?" " Sir, you knew our nicknames?" "!" "Just a second, sir." "Sabina." "Asma, come here." "Sir, this is my wife sabina and she's my daughter asma." "Duggal express!" " Oh, my god!" "Duggal express, sir!" "He's my math teacher." "Did he teach you tables?" "Not only tables but also algebra, calculus..." "he taught me to work hard." "He taught me not to make silly mistakes." "He turned even a person like me into a good boy." "I also know tables." "Two ones are two, two twos are four two threes are six, two fours are... eight." "Two fours are eight." " Yes, eight." "Sir, do you remember venky?" "Venky..." " venkatesh." "The one who wore 4.5..." " 4.5!" "Sir, he's even started a blog named duggal express." " Really?" "He lives in new york with his family." "We live there too, sir." "There are many others, sir." "Some from our school and some from your old coaching classes." "Whenever we meet we talk so much about you." "Zafar, i think we should leave." "Oh." "Sorry, sir." "You're busy." "Give me your number." "I'll come over to school to meet you." " Sure." "Sir, is your scooter still working?" "You must have bought a car by now." "No, i still have the scooter." " You do!" "The number of times you have given us a lift." "Four of us on one scooter!" "Thank you, sir." " Shall we?" "Sir, it was really great seeing you." "Come, dear." " Bye!" "Two ones are two, two twos are four two threes are six, two fours are... two fours are eight." "Is the long-lost teacher - student meeting over?" "Now show the answer-sheet, take your money so we can leave." "Payal... we don't want their money!" "It's okay if we don't buy a car." "Let's go." "Who is she?" " My best student." "Best student... hah!" "They want more money 'cause that ex-student from new york has done so much publicity." "It's respect and not publicity." "You've come to buy marks." "You won't understand." "What's it got to do with you?" "He is the one giving me marks." "If i give you marks that you don't deserve then both of us will fail." "You'll give marks and we'll give you money." "No one fails." "You'll fail because you'll learn that everything can be bought." "I'll fail because when you grow up you'll remember me for my dishonesty." "I want my students to remember me only for something i taught them and it helps them in life." "So that when they grow up, they should introduce me as "duggal sir, the man who made me a good boy or a good girl."" "And that means?" "That means, he'll get the marks that he deserves." "No more no less." "Hey, teacher!" "Are you done with your lecture?" "Now tell me how much you want to give him passing marks." "Stop him from playing video games in class." "He'll understand the lessons and you won't have to crack any deals for him to pass." "And if he is again caught with a gameboy next time then ask him not to paint on my scooter." "It's a request." "He did that!" "You!" "My son!" "My son!" " Papa!" "My son!" "What have you done?" "Who do you think you are?" "Idiots!" "Someone pick me up!" "What does she think of herself?" "!" ""Take it from one hand and give it away from the other."" ""Take it from one hand and give it away from the other."" ""Take it from one hand and give it away from the other."" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""Two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""Two twos are four!" "Two twos are four!"" ""By hook or crook you have to score"" ""when the iron is red hot"" ""go on, strike!"" ""When the oil of dreams is on the boil"" ""go on, fry your dreams."" "Keep coming... keep coming." "That's good." "Stop!" "Farooqi, the car looks as good as brand new." "Poor duggal was put through so much hassle." "Your estimate was 5,000, but it's all repaired within 3,000." "One must keep some margin." "Talk of the... duggal here he is." "Duggal, you've made a profit of 3,000." "Please take your balance money, duggal." "I don't want any money." "I don't want it!" "Looks like there's some big mess." "That's how they conduct stings." "So that everything seems normal." "The ones who he called his father and brother were the cops." "Those who were standing at the door were the cameramen." "They were shooting from far." "No, nothing will happen, papa." "You didn't do anything." "I was about to take the money." "The camera must have covered that." "But you didn't take it, did you?" "You did the right thing." "You can't be punished for doing the right thing." "Don't answer it, papa!" "Break it!" "Break the phone!" "Calm down." "It's farooqi." "Yes farooqi?" "Duggal, come to your balcony." " Why?" "Come on!" " Okay." "But what happened, mr." "Farooqi?" "Come out." " What's the matter?" "Look at me, to your left." "Look to your left." "Yikes!" "Where does the teacher stay?" "Some people are asking for your address." "I haven't given it." "They don't look like decent people." "What's the matter, duggal?" "I'm coming down." " Quickly." "We're just asking you where the teacher's house is." "Kaha suni's dedicated viewers, do look at him carefully!" "He has humiliated knowledge!" "He has disrespected education!" "He has murdered books." "With him is a whole gang, his family." "Your husband and father is being arrested!" "Tell me, how do you feel?" "Tell me!" "There is a beast hidden behind this innocent face!" "Just to buy a car he sold his honesty." "I didn't take the cash." "I haven't taken the cash." "What's the matter?" "What's the noise all about?" " No don't... yes?" "I do not want the loan!" "I'm caught in a calamity, and all you can think of is the car loan." "Idiot!" "Look, i'll surrender." "The matter might get solved if i talk to them." "You stay here." "I'll talk to them." "Listen to me... please listen to me." "Who are you?" " I am his wife." "It's not his fault." "Whatever has happened is all because of me." "I told him that we'll go to urml's in-laws' place in a car." "I persuaded mr." "Farooqi too." "His tail-light broke because of me." "I pushed my husband on the wrong path." "By god, he is innocent." "Madamji, what are you trying to say." "Please spare him." "Please." "Sir, please don't give that sting tape to any news channel." "But... - yes, we won't do it again." "Promise." "Please don't arrest him." "Why are you piling wrong accusations on to us?" "!" "I've told you so many times to pull out the visiting card when we meet strange" "yes." "Here you go, madam." "Popley sweets!" " Here." "You also take one." "Do we look like cops?" "We've been running popley sweets for the last three generations." "We make the best sweets." "No one in delhi can make them better than us." "Teacher, you also take my card." "Are you a math teacher or a physical instructor?" "Made me run around so much." "Come here, you moron." "Not you, send that elder moron's son." "Touch his feet!" " Touch his feet!" "Click a picture." "Say sorry to him." "Sorry." "Get lost." "Never mind, teacher." "It's okay." "Let my grandson fail." "But now you teach him so well... so well... that he passes the exams on his own." "Here." "Here's the money." "12 months' payment in advance." "It's not a bribe." "It's your tuition fee." "No... the school pays me a salary to teach him." "You don't have to be so honest." "With your teacher's salary, it would be impossible to provide for your family." "But i wont provide for them with charity either." "I know what you get paid..." "every class with fifty students... so much hard work... always writing on the blackboard... i know what you get paid... peanuts." "I know." "We work hard too, but we make sweets." "We sell them for 150 per kilo." "Its eaten and finished off." "But teacher... you make good human beings." "One small mistake, and the result is a "bad boy" who will grow up to destroy the country." "I'm giving this money for my own good... my grandson's good." "If you are broke, surely you will go ...around trying to make money by other means." "Then how will you find time to teach my grandson." "Go on take it, mr." "Duggal." "Don't worry it is tuition fee." "That's the spirit." "If i had a teacher like you... then even i would have become a good boy, and i would have made my moron sons good boys too." "Never mind." "Now you make my grandson a good boy." "Come on, morons!" "What were you going on about the tape?" "Do we look like journalists?" "We don't make bitter news, we make syrupy sweets they are so sweet you won't be able to stop licking your fingers." "'Not till an outsider tells you... ' ' do you appreciate the value of someone who is part of your everyday life.'" "'Others may not have realised it... ' '... but popley uncle instantly... ' '... figured out a teacher's value.'" "And because of him, i realised my papa's value." "Not like it turned out to be a "dramatic happy ending"." "'We didn't shift from a one-bedroom flat... ' '... to a three-bedroom one.'" "'Neither did mummy get a new fridge... ' '... nor did i get an ipod.'" "'Nor did deepu get his ipl team.'" "'But after that episode, i always proudly... ' '... tell everyone that my father is a teacher.'" "'No matter how many necklaces... ' '... mickey's father sells to buy new cars, no one introduces him... ' '... as, "the man who made me a good boy."'" "So what if we couldn't buy the car of my choice, we did get to buy a car." "Moreover deepu got out of betting." "And all these good things happened while buying a car." "'I wonder what will happen when we buy a home theatre.'" "Who says consumerism is bad." "'Whoever says that is an idiot.'" "Yay!" "Hey!" "Come out!" "I want to sit... i'm going to sit in front and guide!" "No." "If papa will sit in the front, then i won't drive." "Why am i always made to sit at the back?" "!" "I'm going, i'll catch a bus." " Dude!" "My dear, come here, no fear." "Come." "Come here." "Sir, should i make it a full-tank?" "Rates are being hiked from tomorrow." "By how much?" " By 5.5% on petrol." "From tomorrow?" " Should i fill it up?" "Rates are being hiked, not my salary." "Just fill 10 litres." "Now slowly release the clutch." "Slowly." "Slowly!" "It's not an express." "Wow, papa!" "You did it!" "Not bad at all!" "Well done, mr." "Santosh duggal!" "What's the use of going to the mall now?" "The movie must have already started." "On our scooter we would have squeezed our way through." "You have a car now." "Forget the scooter." "Now you look like a car owner!" "Is that your car, sir?" " Yes." "It's good, isn't it?" "I wonder what state it'll be in, when you get it back." "What?" " See for yourself." "Stop!" " Stop!" "It's new!" "Lt'll get spoilt!" " Stop!" "Please spare us!" " Stop!" "Come out here." "We are about to win the cricket match." "Duggal!" "And it's a big hit..." "it's a six." "India has won!" "India has won!" "India is the champion once again!" "Thank you!" "Thank you!" "India!" "India oye!" "India!" "India oye!"