"Singapore by night." "Time to say goodbye To the Yugoslavs who brought me here." "Sorry I didn't finish the painting." " Bye-bye." " Bye-bye!" "Thank you, chief engineer man!" "The cleanest engine room in the business!" "I'm late." "My connection to Hong Kong May have already sailed," "But at this moment it seems unimportant," "Such is the effect of a Yugoslav farewell." "I gather there's a rush." "Passepartout is not so cheerful." "The connecting boat has sailed, But she's lying four miles off Singapore" "And if we can get there, we'll board!" "It's nice to see you all again." "We've missed you." "Missed someone to carry The sound equipment!" "So this is Singapore, gateway to the Orient." "Or is it Leicester?" "I thought I'd see the world on this trip." "I can't see a thing!" "This is the second time i've been to Singapore and not seen it!" " I went through the airport..." " No Raffles Hotel." "After a sobering dash across The busiest harbour i've ever seen," "We come to rest below a wall of solid steel." "Watch your back against the gangway!" "Lit up, far above me, Are the words Neptune Diamond," "Up to now, just a name in a phone message." "It's 3.15 in the morning and i've made it!" "I've reached the southernmost point Of the journey," "Just 100 miles from the equator." "I've turned the corner And am heading north for the first time." "And, for the first time since Jeddah, I feel optimism creeping into my bones." "It may not be pretty, This floating metal island, but it is fast." "Phileas Fogg found a captain Who could do the 1,400 miles to Hong Kong," ""In six days, at most."" "Our captain promises 67 hours." "And this is our captain." "He's a Geordie, Norman Tuddenham, The only European in the crew," "But he has his wife Pat for company." "Here we are in the middle of the South China Sea with a Singaporean crew," "But the room here seems very much Like a little bit of Britain." "Is it very common for the wives of captains To be allowed on board?" "Years ago, it used to be Only the senior personnel was on," "But now a lot more wives travel" "And it's good for them to know what Their husbands do and their problems." "It's like two lives And sometimes wives can't cope with that." " And children, too." " How many children have you got?" "I have two, but they're grown up now." "160 miles off the coast of Vietnam, and the Wind is hitting the ship at 50 miles an hour." "It's typhoon season on the South China Sea." "There's a tropical storm heading north after us And a very severe developing to the east." "These ships are massive enough To withstand most weathers." "They may be modern and soulless," "But on a day like today, I'm glad Of every bit of technology we can afford." "How do you view the fact That there seems to be a trend" "Towards much more automation On these ships now?" "In ten years, how many people Will be running a ship like this?" "I think you're looking for An educated monkey, one." "Something like that." "We seem to find it difficult to understand The operations of ship owners." "Everything is commercial nowadays." "The old standard has gone." "Maybe it's good, I don't know, but it's gone." "Now we're electronic experts." "I've got a technical chief engineer And a technical chief officer." "I have to remember whether to go Left or right or quick or fast." "I've got to remember that money is the thing." "That's all the ship was built for, To make cash." "Everybody else gets involved in their work On the ship, I'm interested in money." "It feels like being in the fast lane Of a motorway." "You seem to pass everything else." "Does anything pass you?" "Only another container ship And we try not to let that happen." "We're so fast, basically faster Than most ships at sea," "That stopping is our problem." "Going to Hong Kong, I have to decide 47 miles before getting to a pilot." "That is 37 miles to slow down To manoeuvring speed" "And then ten miles to get down to the pilot, Down to stop, or whatever." "Hong Kong in the early hours of Day 42." "By the skin of our teeth, we missed One of the worst storms in years," "Typhoon Tess." "Talking of near misses, a container blew up On the Diamond as she left Hong Kong later." "But Capt Tuddenham Has delivered me speedily and efficiently" "To one of the most speedy And efficient ports in the world." "Feeling anything but speedy and efficient, I unload myself at 8.00 in the morning." "I'd expected to be met, But the weather has made me late" "And I resign myself To arriving in Hong Kong the hard way." "But a day of surprises Is only just beginning." "Good morning, Mr Palin, Welcome to Hong Kong." "Sir, there is a champagne service for you, If you'd like it." "I've been trying To write this into the script for weeks!" " Thank you very much." " You're welcome, sir." "Quarter to nine." "Time to start on this." "After..." "Ten days at sea, Your habits change a bit." "You tend to drink earlier and earlier." "You can take as long as you want." "Oops, hey!" "As I look out, the shining, impassive faces Of wealth and power stare unblinkingly back." "Do I really want to be back in all this?" "What the hell, for now i'll swallow A few principles and think of England!" "Mr Palin, five minutes, Arrival in the Peninsula." "Ah, this looks more like it - Like China, I mean." "I shouldn't sound so surprised, as Hong Kong Is and always was a Chinese city," "Despite some plausible attempts To prove otherwise." "The Peninsula Hotel, one of the oldest Surviving colonial buildings," "Has offered the best for over 60 years." "Inside, one enters a palace," "A glittering reminder that whatever excess The rest of the world can offer," "Hong Kong will cap it." "Good morning." "Palin." "Welcome to the Peninsula, sir." " Thank you very much." " Just sign here, please." " Just sign here?" " Yes, sir." "Do they know i've come off a container ship?" " Your room number will be 417." " Thanks." "I feel like a floating piece of wreckage." "I am afraid that one of my bags That has worked so well so far," "The strap broke as I arrived in Hong Kong." " Could you get it repaired?" " Sure, we'll do that." "This is the wrong room." "This looks like the bar!" " For me?" " Yes, sir." "We wish for you To enjoy everything here, sir." "I've had so many days at sea, This is like sensory deprivation..." " You can enjoy it." " It's like a fix." "Thank you." " Is the room satisfactory for you?" " It looks wonderful, yes." "Oh, it's a bed." "It looks like a chorus line!" "The waiter has saved these In your room for you." " Champagne." " I haven't drunk any for ten minutes." "Thanks very much." "What to do first?" "I can't ring home." "It's 2 a.m." "I'll just have an orange juice." ""Mr Michael Palin"." "Extraordinary coincidence." "That's my name." ""'Hong Kong Tatler' requests the pleasure Of the company of Mr Michael Palin" ""at a cocktail reception to celebrate the halfway Point of 'Around the World in 80 Days'."" "Oh, dear, I hoped I was anonymous." "Black tie." "Before I surrender myself To the temptations of the city," "I ring and check The next onward connection to China." "There's a ferry to Canton on Monday morning" "Which gives me time To go to this mysterious party." " Can you make me a suit by tomorrow?" " Sure." " Tomorrow, four o'clock?" " Four, yes." "Any time." " i'll take your measurements." " Now?" " Now, yes." " Wonderful." "Instant tailoring." "This is the way." "I see you've had a few famous customers." "Harold Wilson." "Getting his suit." "George Michael." "24.5 sleeves." "Any time George Michael and Harold Wilson Share a place..." "Dr Kissinger!" "I think I'm fairly stock size, aren't I?" "Derek Nimmo!" "Ohh, g-hosh!" "Oh, I would so frightfully like a suit." "Why do they all come to you?" "Because I am getting good name, sir." "Good word of mouth, that's your secret." "Who was in yesterday?" "Any crowned heads of state?" "The world has been here!" "David Bowie." " You like?" " I quite like a double breasted." "Which did David Bowie have?" " This one." " The Classic, yes." "Two buttons." "I'm going to be a bit different." "I'll go for the Contemporary." " One suit." " And I need a white shirt..." " and a bow tie." " When you need?" "Monday?" "No, I need it tomorrow to go with this gear." " OK." " I need it same time tomorrow afternoon." "The shirt will be ready tomorrow And the suit will be fitted today." "Right, so I write my name here." "It says, "Name and rank."" " Yes." " I don't have a rank, really." "...Palin, presenter third class." "On the streets of Kowloon, I can escape The world of schedules and deadlines" "And watch local life." "(BIRDS TWITTER)" "It's exhilarating and unfamiliar, Especially in the bird market." "A long street offers feathered friends For all your needs " "Singing, eating, fighting or just a chat." "Hello!" "Hello!" "I've been in a sketch with you once." "Yes, I 'ave." "Do you know John Cleese?" "John Cleese used to Thump you up and down on a counter!" "They think I'm mad." "Quite right." "It's a cross between a zoo and a club." "People walk their birds just to enjoy The company of other birds." " Is it like taking the dog for a walk?" " Yes." " Strange people." " Are these songbirds?" " Yes, but not now." " That's because we're on TV." "I can hear a lot of others singing here." "Does others singing make yours sing?" "Yes, but it's too young." "Vocal chords have got to grow yet." "So, the grasshoppers are food for the birds." "The small ones just take some meat." "The big ones eat the whole thing." " Live?" "Just wriggling about?" " Yeah." "Are grasshoppers a delicacy, Or just a basic food?" " It's one of the basic foods." " Is it?" "Have you ever eaten grasshoppers?" "No." "I know Thai people Like flying grasshoppers." "Thai people like them." "My new-found Francis of Assisi role Receives a setback" "When a cockatoo takes a fancy to my trousers." "A friendly peck turns into A full-blooded assault on the kneecap!" "I'd hate to see what would happen If I was in shorts!" "I want the evidence to be shown!" "I've only got three pairs of trousers!" "Now they're aertex!" "Hong Kong, like New York, Is a city of constant movement." "On the water, sampans, barges And cruise liners fight for space" "With the Star Ferries connecting Hong Kong island with the mainland." "On land, old Glaswegian trams, A derided form of transport in Britain," "Enjoy a heady retirement." "The only way, I think, to visit one's tailor." "I was..." "I'm having a double-breasted?" " Yes, but this is basic fitting." " Oh, I see." "Am I Henry Kissinger's shape?" " I think he's more bigger." " He's a bigger man." "Whereabouts?" "Frontal area." " How's the shoulders?" " That's fine." " Sleeves?" " That feels OK." "Seems OK to you?" "I like a looser one." "I like a little bit more room." "It's a long way to come for a suit, But I like Hong Kong," "So I could get all my clothes here." " This is..." " You are happy?" "I think so." "It's difficult to tell." "If you Can make it a bit looser, it's fine." "After such a hectic day, I think I might Spend a quiet evening in." "But it does seem a waste of Hong Kong," "Where an enormous amount of electricity Goes into luring out the night-time punters." "Happy Valley racecourse, One of the colony's legends." "Bang in the middle of the city, It's a spectacular setting and a success." "Hi, Chris." "Chris Collings, you're the racing Correspondent in the local paper." "Explain this phenomenon to me." "It looks the most prosperous racetrack In the world." "Is there money in racing?" "Certainly is." "It is the only game in town As far as the local people are concerned." "The turnover last season Was about 28.8 billion Hong Kong dollars." "(CHRIS) The Jockey Club is non-profit making." "The money goes into a charity." "They build hospitals, parks." "They do a lot of good for the community." "This is the first twilight meeting This season - afternoon start." "There will be 30,000-40,000 people here." "There's no live telecast today So everyone's here." "Why is horse racing so popular?" "They have a history of gambling." "The Chinese like to bet." "Go to casinos in Macao And there are people there 24 hours a day." "They've just got a love for horse racing." "Have you got a tip for the?" "Maybe the 6.30 would be best." "I've no idea at all." "Something that will make me money." "Hopefully, Super Gear will be all right." "Super Gear, right." "So, number eight, Super Gear." "Here we go." "Hello, I'd like $100 to win On number eight, Race Six." "And I'm going to also try..." "Yup." "And..." "I'm losing money here, you know." "And i'll try $100 to win on number five, Fantastic Season." "200..." "Yes, there you are." "Thank you." "Not funny." "It's a serious business for me, Losing money." "The Sport of Kings transferred lock, Stock and barrel to the Orient." "It's no longer the British, but Australians, New Zealanders and the Chinese" "Who produce the bulk of the owners, Trainers and horses." "This confident atmosphere was captured Months before the student uprising in China." "Happy Valley may never be As happy as this again." "(C0MMENTARY) In the stalls, They're ready and racing..." "Super Gear is in fourth position, tucked in." "Where is number five?" "Come on!" "Come on!" "Still in fourth!" "Eight has gone up to second!" "That's Super Gear!" "He's going to win!" "He's going to win!" "Ha ha!" "At one fell swoop, i've won More than on the last 12 Grand Nationals!" " Is an error." " There's an error?" "Oh, dear." "Tension." "Seven hundred?" "Wow!" "Thank you very much." "£57 sterling!" "Hong Kong, here I come!" "And it's too dark for Passepartout To follow me!" "Sunday morning, seven weeks out of London," "And I'm taking a day trip To the island of Cheung Chow." "It's been called the Hong Kong Riviera" "And it does have a seductive mixture Of the Orient and the Mediterranean." "It's also home to a friend of mine, Basil Pao," "An artist, designer, photographer And complete renaissance Chinaman." "For BBC expenses, I am hoping to lure him To Shanghai with me" "As interpreter and travelling companion." "We have come to spoil your Sunday." "All right." "Who are these people?" " This is Passepartout." " Oh, they're with you, are they?" "They're with me, unfortunately, but if we Walk, we may lose them in the crowd." "It's great to see you!" " Hello, darling, I'm home!" " Honey, I'm home..." "With 40 people!" "Besides seeing Basil and Pat again, There is another celebration." "I am about to meet their first child, Sonia, Who is exactly as old as my journey." "Oh, dear." "Hello, darling!" "Shall I take her?" "See how Basil handles..." "Very good." "She has lots of hair." "Now, don't tell me. 43 days old." "That's great." " Good thing she's got Mum's eyes." " i'll bore you in years to come." "Michael, a glass of champagne?" "A glass of champagne?" "Twist my arm." "If you insist." " Right, i'll..." " Want me to?" "So, she was born on September 25th, What time?" "Around 5.30 Hong Kong time, So there's seven hours difference." "Seven hours behind would be..." "About the time our train left" "Victoria Station." "Can I take you back, please, as a present?" "As a present!" " Hello, Sonia." " He's an old softie, your Uncle Michael." "Here we go." "To you both and to Sonia." "Welcome to our home." "And to anyone else Who has been on the road 43 days!" "You don't mind me taking Basil away to China For a few days?" "I think he would be very..." "He'd be very useful." "How are you with the language?" "The only problem would be dialects." "As you go through, dialects will change." "They will speak in the same language, But different slang," "To the point where my mother and my father Lived maybe 30 kilometres from each other," "Their ancestral villages," "And they can't understand a single word If they speak their local dialect." " What about road signs, station signs?" " The written is the same." "The written has always been the same." "The thing with the dialects Is that most of it cannot be written." "Cantonese, Which you hear everywhere here," "Most of it you can't write." "After this brief reminder Of things back home," "Like family life and lazy Sundays," "It's back into Hong Kong." "Somewhere in those canyons, A suit is waiting for me!" "(MAN) Christian is giving the party." "Thank you very much." "And this is my wife, Liz Hodgson, Who is Associate Editor of the "Tatler"." " Ah, got the plug in then?" " Yes!" "The guests are mostly foreigners Who have done well in Hong Kong." "The club is named after their second Favourite topic of conversation - 1997." "China has always used Hong Kong For foreign exchange." "I spend about one hour travelling." "Their favourite topic is money." "Everyone here is obsessed by money." "People do work hard." "Put them together And if you can pay for it, you can get it." "He was paying About 6,000 Hong Kong a month." "No, I can bargain for 2 million..." "2.5 million." " 2.5." " At 2.5, it's worthwhile." "Is China the Golden Apple That everyone wants to get at?" "Is there much money there?" "No money at all." "There is not a lot to be made." "Yes, it is really ridiculous." "(THEY SPEAK IN A CHINESE DIALECT)" "It is pretty clear that Hong Kong's future Lies with the business community." "If they stay on after '97, Then things won't change much." "But if they decide to go..." "I was a bit wrecked!" "It was a very fast boat." "It did 24 knots, Or almost 30 miles an hour," "And the captain was very cool." "He was British." "He said, "Oh, there's a storm Coming in from the east." "This is severe." ""Severe tropical storm, could be a typhoon." "And a small one from the west."" "I think if we'd left 12 hours later from Singapore, I probably would have died." "So, when are you leaving?" "We leave tomorrow morning." "The catamaran for Canton pulls in at 8.00." "It isn't the fashionable way to leave Hong Kong, but it's a great introduction to China." "China, here we come!" "I'm very badly prepared for China." "I know nothing about it, but I think It's too late to start reading now!" "It's impossible to prepare for it." "It'll surprise you." "You know how in some countries It's rude to cross your legs," "Is there anything in China One should avoid doing?" "No, they've been around too long, They do anything now." "This Chinese-operated ferry Was built in Norway two years ago." "It's capable of a brisk 30 knots, But it has to keep slowing" "For all manner of vessels Coming at us down the Pearl River." "One of the recurring delights of travel" "Is that countries a few miles apart Can look so different." "Hong Kong seems glamorous Beside its prospective owner," "Like a well-dowried bride About to marry beneath her." "China is still in another era." "Three hours after leaving Hong Kong, We are walking out into China," "At Canton, now called Guangzhou." "I have the feeling Of entering this vast country" "Through one of the smallest Of its back doors." " Chinese soil." " They'll probably give you hassle here." "Oh, dear." "I'll need my passport." "I don't think i've done anything To worry about." "I'm not a member Of any proscribed organisations." "I did declare diarrhoea on my health form." "The homely terminal is one of the bonuses Of not travelling by air." "The uniforms are Ruritanian," "The fittings Dickensian." "As one would expect in a country of over A billion people, there are no staff shortages." "We are dealt with briskly and efficiently" "And this is the first port of entry Where we've been allowed to film!" "We are let into the People's Republic In 40 minutes flat, another world record!" "Our hotel, the White Swan, Isn't easy to miss." "It's the real thing, a real replica Of a western luxury hotel," "Complete with bellhops, A roof-top golf range" "And a cold running waterfall." "My 16th-floor window looks out Over the wooded island of Shamian," "On which foreign traders Were confined 200 years ago." "Nowadays, one can go anywhere, Provided they know where you are." "The constant movement of people Reminds me of India." "The Chinese move purposefully, Intent on getting somewhere." "There isn't much of the drifting Curiousness of Indian street life." "And there isn't a quieter rush hour Anywhere, but for how long?" "Just imagine the difference on the day These people trade their cycles in for Toyotas." "This may look like a day at the zoo," "But it's a night at one of Canton's Most famous restaurants." "There's really only one ingredient." "I don't understand a word of it!" "There's a large variety here." ""Fried Snake..." " "Stewed, three different..."" " Three different snakes?" " Yeah." " We don't want three." ""Deep fried snake, Snake skin with mushrooms..."" " You can have slices, or shreds..." " It's all the same, really." "All the way through, it's all the same." "Which is the best?" "Let's lash out." "I don't want people to say, "You had snake?" "Did you have the head?" "Oh, blimey!"" "I think we should have some soup And then stir fried." " OK." " Just a taster." "And maybe snake balls?" "I mean..." "Minced..." "I'll give it a try!" "If they can find 'em, I'll eat 'em!" "What is special is that Many of these snakes are venomous." "This, I'm told, adds to the flavour, If not the life expectancy of the chefs." "Gourmet parties come here From across the border," "For good snake Is one thing Hong Kong doesn't have." " Is everybody here eating snake?" " I think so." "Ah, here comes our food." "From the way it's moving, it looks underdone." "Which one do you fancy, Mike?" "None of them at all, Basil, at the moment." "(SNAKE HISSES)" "What do we choose them on?" "Stripes?" "Nice design?" "I don't really like seeing what I eat first." "I've always been like that." "Having cows brought in the restaurant, Little lambs..." "I'd rather not." " Shall we say any one?" " They look the same to me." "What are we having?" " One each?" " One long one." "I couldn't eat a whole snake!" "What is he doing now?" "He is taking out the gall bladder." "That's the gall bladder?" "And is that nasty or nice?" "It is supposed to be a delicacy." "He's going to kill it now." "He's disembowelled it and now he'll kill it!" "It's like the Middle Ages." "They used to do this to bishops!" "It's like going to an abattoir to get a meal." "Yes." "I suppose If you have been around for 4,000 years," "There aren't too many things You haven't done." "That snake..." "The head is still wriggling about!" " Oh, that's quite..." " Nasty, isn't it, Michael?" "It's a little bit unpleasant." " He's doing it skilfully, I must say." " It's a first for me, too." "If that had been a lamb, or he'd taken The top off a squirrel or a budgie," "People would be..." "Just some ice cream for me, please." "Ten minutes later, it all looks so different." "There it is!" "This is the shredded..." " This is the shredded braised..." " Shredded cobra?" " Cobra!" " Shredded cobra." "This is a first!" "Double first." "First day in China And first time eating snake." "Ah, this is the braised snake's belly" "With mushrooms." "That looks too like what I saw on the floor." "I'll try this." "I hope it doesn't bite." "Actually, we can't get this in Hong Kong." "We can't get Most of these dishes in Hong Kong." "Why can't you get this in Hong Kong?" "There really isn't one restaurant..." "I suppose, in part because of supply." "Here, you know, They come from the provinces next door." "Poisonous snakes From the mountains and hills, etc." "The buyers go out there and get them From the villagers who catch them." " They catch..." " They catch wild snakes?" " Yes." " So these are free range?" "The free range ones taste better." "I guess they've had more exercise." "Great." "Lovely." "Next morning, We take the early express to Shanghai." "It's an overnight journey of 1,100 miles." "Recently, a train on this route Was delayed 40 hours by a landslide!" "If this happens again, I miss my boat Connections in Shanghai and Tokyo," "But Basil and I leave full of hope." "There are class divisions Even on Chinese trains." "We are in "soft class", Reserved for top party officials," "Generals and successful businessmen." " Want the bottom or top?" " I just want to sit for a moment." " Right." " But i'll go up on the top." "The majority of the passengers face A 35-hour journey on wooden benches," "Whilst us softies enjoy good food And faintly Edwardian luxury." "Very nice, yes." "I see you are going on a journey!" "Not very far And you will be extremely uncomfortable." "(SPEAKS IN MANDARIN)" "(CHINESE ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)" "This is yet another class - intermediate." "They look like seasoned travellers, Settling neatly into very little space." "They all seem to have things to do." "This is friendly class, this is." "One lady wanted to practise the English She'd learnt from the BBC World Service." " Where do you live?" " I live in Shanghai." "The people who are travelling in this car, Will they all be going to Shanghai?" " Yes." " Where are you going?" "Back home?" "I will first go back home." "I am staying In Shanghai and living in Shanghai." " Then I will..." "With my sister..." " This is your sister?" "Hello." "Next year, I will leave Shanghai To study in Australia." " Australia?" " Yes, the Sydney College of English." " You are going to Australia?" " Yes." "There we are!" "There is A railway employee about every 250 yards," "Standing to attention with his flag." "One thing they're not short of - people." "Public works is obviously still a big thing here." "Building roads, new railways." "Well, construction is big." "Very big now." "Later in the day, as we pull Into the station at Zhen-Zhou," "An unexpected opportunity arises To collect another of my proofs of travel." "In this case, Terry Gilliam's roof tile." "They've got some roof tiles." "The way to the roof is blocked by an object Which makes it even more of an adventure." "This is China, Where they still build steam engines." "I have to take a Chinese roof tile Back to Terry Gilliam." "I can kill two birds with one stone." "Look, above the steam engine." "I can get in the steam engine And get the tile." "Magnificent!" "And one Chinese roof tile!" "I feel like Richard Leakey with the skull Of the first Homo erectus." "As befits a station tile, It is absolutely filthy," "But cleaned, I can wrap it safely in my laundry." "The galley, meanwhile, is preparing one Of the best meals i've ever had on a train." "There are five chefs for one coach, But if this is what they produce," "It's one of the strongest arguments Against labour saving!" "The menu is adventurous." "Though snake is off, They do have crispy duck's gizzards." "He said I could bring back A Chinese roof tile." "He also said I could bring back Two types of cholera." "I thought I'd give that a miss." "I said, "If I do, you're the first i'll kiss."" "Many of my fellow diners Are Chinese from Taiwan." "This year, the Taiwanese Have been allowed back in" "For the first time since they fled From Communism in 1949." "They have evidently prospered." "It's a staff canteen, as well, mind you." "Most passengers can't afford it." "They eat from polystyrene lunch boxes Which end up strewn over the line." "As dusk gives way To a spectacular South Chinese sunset," "I get talking to another Occupant of the soft class." "She seemed the nearest thing To a Chinese yuppie." " Where do you live?" " I come from Shanghai, of course." "And where have you just been on the train?" "Oh, we just went to the Canton Fair, The 64th Canton Fair." "And it closed down on November 5th," "So we are..." "We are coming back to Shanghai." " Why were you at the fair?" " Oh, just doing some business." " Do some business." " Buying or selling?" " Selling." " You are obviously busy." "Yeah, very busy." "Do you have a boyfriend Or a regular man friend?" "Yes." "Good." "Do you expect to get married soon?" "I don't know." "Would you like to be married soon?" "Not very soon, Because I have my own career to pursue." "I want to do some..." "Unusual things before I get married." "If there was only one question you wanted To ask someone coming from Britain," "What would you ask me?" "Yeah, only one question?" "Do you carry an umbrella with you every day?" " Is that true or not?" " No." "If I set out with an umbrella, I'd lose it within a day!" "No, I don't." "I just get wet." "Ah, just get wet!" "OK." "You inscrutable Chinese." "You're all the same, aren't you?" "Yes." "I am getting the swing of this." "What do you think of that, eh?" "The morning after the night before In Jianxi Province" "And the first cold day of my journey." "Eight days ago, I was in Singapore, Almost on the equator." "Now I'm 2,000 miles further north" "And in a four-season climate For the first time since crossing the Alps." "There is a small army Of 50 staff on this train." "I'm not sure what they do." "Yesterday, I saw one energetically Sloshing a mop up and down our corridor." "Didn't seem to do the carpet any good at all!" "The light outside is becoming softer." "The countryside is golden brown." "After six weeks in the tropics, it's a shock." "I never expected The Chinese landscape to look familiar." "(SPEAKS IN MANDARIN)" "The on-train DJ announces request time." "Armed with Billy Joel and a Mozart flute Concerto, I go to try my luck." "She hadn't heard of Mozart, but at least The lyrics aren't ideologically unsound." "It's much better Than listening to it on cassette." "Will this go all the way?" "Will everyone on the train hear it?" " Yes." " An audience of hundreds." "(M0ZARTFLUTE C0NCERT0)" "To my considerable surprise, I have crossed China on time." "For once, I allow myself To be quietly confident." "We have still to reach Shanghai, of course, And find the boat to Japan," "And I'm not even halfway round the world yet," "But it looks like it's going to be A nice day tomorrow."