"Stop moving" "Stop rushing me" "You moron!" "What?" "You're wondering, what the hell is going on?" "Let's go back two days" "It's all because of this fool" "He won a prize in Beijing" "One Week Grand Tour to Taiwan" "The moment I bumped into him was the start of my worst nightmare" ""Beijing Security Guard" " Ocean"" ""Crime Boss" " Z"" ""Female Assassins"" ""Crazy Tour Guide" " Idol"" ""Clueless Tourist" " Jane"" ""Local Mafia" " Gangster Wu"" ""Taipei Security Guard" " Jay"" " Stop, right there" " Don't run" "Watch the painting" "Don't damage the painting" "The painting's gone!" "Reques for backup!" "Stay where you are!" "Don't ruin it!" "Stay at your position" "Repeat, stay at your position" "Jay, why did you do that?" "What the..." "Jay" "Why did you leave your position?" "I can handle this all by myself" "Security is all about teamwork" "If the team can't keep up with me" "It's not my fault" "What's important is that I got it back" "Just look at the painting" "Take a good long look" "In three days' time" "In three days this treasure will be exhibited at the National Palace Museum" "and this is how you'll protect it?" "Today's result is a FAIL" "You have three hours to prep and we'll do the drill again" "Dismissed!" "Respect the team." "Stop the one man act" "Priceless classic painting in cross-strait exhibition..." "is a first-time ever expected to draw large tourist crowds from China to come to Taiwan" "This is the captain speaking" " Here's the water, Miss." " Thank you." "... anareaof turbulence" "Hey!" "That's what this is for" "Thank you" "Are flights always so bumpy?" "Sometimes... it'sbumpierthanridinginacar" "What?" "So... sorry" "This airline is very safe" "Just breathe" "Yah!" "Welcome to Taiwan" "I'm Tour Guide Idol from the" ""Best Agency in Taiwan"" "Idol takes away your worries" "Idol never lets you be bored" "Dearest guests from China" "I am your humble guide" "My name is Idol" "This Idol follows you everywhere" "Anytime Anywhere" "Whatever you please" "Idol will whisk you there" "You are so lucky to have me" "Because I am a certified 5-star guide" "My rating is of the highest rank" "Higher than even Superman can fly" "But..." "My one rule is that nobody leaves the group" "Nobody travels independently" "If you dare leave the group" "I will personally hunt you down" "Of course our tour itself is wonderful" " Are you all right?" " You won't forget it" "I emphasize again, stick with the group" "No running off...hey, what are you doing?" "I said "No running off"" "Here we are at the National Palace Museum" "Idol takes away all your worries" "Idol whisks you everywhere" "We have arrived at the National Palace Museum" "Don't wander off alone" "Don't try to get ahead of Idol" "Back off back off, get behind me" "And keep up!" "The ones behind, don't get lost" "Come away" "Here we are, still at the National Palace Museum" "Keep up!" "Keep up!" "Keep moving along" "Sorry, are you ok?" "Let me clean that for you" "What?" "I didn't do it on purpose" "Ready?" "Wow, this looks so real" "Makes me feel hungry" "Ok, time's up" "My dear Chinese guests" "Time flies when you're having fun" "We have more exciting locations waiting" "The vacation of a lifetime" "But I'm not finished here yet" "That's right, we've only been in here for minutes" "All I saw was a cabbage and a piece of pork" "Always rushing us" "Pay attention!" "Please!" "Don't forget our most important rule" "Don't leave the group, don't wander off alone" "Before we go" "I'd like to remind you of my special theory" "When you travel, always be merry and spend every cent you carry" "So, before we leave and spend every cent you carry" "So, before we leave" "Remember to support the Taiwan economy, ok?" "Let's go" "Take a photo of me" "Photos are not allowed" "Oh, they won't know, come on" "My first trip to Taiwan...half an hour only so rushed!" "First time to Taiwan, and this is it?" "Yeah" "What a bummer" "Sir, this is Tamshui pearl 1 00% Authentic!" "Buy it or regret it" "Where are you from?" "Beijing, right?" "Beijing is great!" "Beijing men are generous" "Buy more than one" "Miss, your skin is so smooth" "This suits you just perfectly" "I'll give you a deal if you buy twenty" "Discount just for you" "Where can I buy a pearl necklace?" "Over there." "Go!" "Go!" "Go!" "Choose whichever one you want" "Can I have a look at this one?" "Ok" "Just a second" "Here" "I bought it" "I need to go to the washroom" "Go!" "Go!" "Go!" "These pearls are too small" "Give me bigger ones" "Take them out" "Watch out, security's ahead" "What exactly is Jay's problem?" "How would I know?" "Because of him, we haven't rested in days" "What you gonna do if we have a break?" "Go for a walk" "Let's eat" "Ok" "Code is 1 -2-0-3" "We're in" "Where's Jay?" "I don't know" "Captain John calling Jay" "Reply when you get this" "Calling Captain John" "The treasure's been stolen" "Send back up immediately" "No, you get back to the team right now" "I know what I'm doing, I'll take care of it" "You think you can?" "Get back here!" "Hey!" "Stop!" "Get out of there, now!" "Robbery!" "Sorry" "Robbery!" "How dare you in broad daylight?" "Don't you run" "Are you crazy?" "Don't you run!" "Stop!" "Thank you" "You're welcome" "I'm so lucky" "Let's go!" "Get on the bus" "We're going to our next stop" "Hurry and get on the bus" "That's all" "Get on the bus, here we go" "Where do you think you're going?" "Let me go!" "Security guard" "You know I'm a security guard and you still run?" "No, I'm the security" "What's this?" "See this?" "I'm on a mission" "You're...security?" "What about those two girls?" "Thieves!" "Are you working with them?" "I don't even know them" "I just thought they needed help" "Then what are you doing here?" "I..." "I 'monvacation" "My tour bus is over there" "Huh?" "!" "Where's the bus?" "The bus?" "!" "Oh no, I'm separated from my tour group" "Wait, there's a girl in your group with a lot of painting scrolls, right?" "You mean the girl with big eyes and a camera?" "That's the one" "What do you want with her?" "You screwed up my mission, come with me" "Help!" "Kidnap!" "I'm innocent!" "Stop struggling" "Let me go" "Where's your hotel?" "I don't remember" "We're the "Grand Tour"" "Jay and these two women" "Is he working with them?" "He's caught on camera" " and now he's gone" " Shut it!" "Just find him" "Ten years ago" "When my father was on his deathbed he told me that his dream was to acquire this particular piece of treasure" "He asked me if I would keep you two in the family business" "He was sure that your skills would be of great value to me" "But now" "After three years of planning" "Today we finally get to see what you're worth" "I've gotta say" "I wasn't very impressed!" "No more mistakes" "33, 34... 35...36...37...38... 38?" "Stop!" "Can you let me go?" "Can I have a look?" "Hey" "Are they here?" "Just ask" "The guest registration is here" "Look for my tour guide Idol" "I don't see Idol anywhere" "Do you remember or not?" "I didn't say for sure it's this hotel" "Look at the list again" "Where are you?" "I'm chasing down the treasure" "By yourself?" "I'm very close" "If I find this Idol, I'll find the treasure" "All right, let's figure this out" "But first, you come back" "Ok, right, I'll come back now" "Let me go" "Where are we?" "Help!" "Come back!" "Corner him when he comes over" "Don't let him go, got it?" ""I will retrieve the treasure"" ""and prove my innocence"" "Help!" "Help!" "Let me go, please!" "Are you crazy?" "If I'm crazy it's all your fault" "Fine, so you don't know the hotel name" "Do you know where your next stop is?" "Stop shouting" "Let me think" "I wrote down the schedule" "I can't read simplified Chinese" "Bummer" "I'm still so tired from jet lag" "Are you crazy, that's too loud" "I have a bad ear, I can't hear properly" "Then don't listen at all" ""Deng Dwa-lang, Deng dwa-lang"" "What does that mean?" "Medicine to make you grow taller, a con" "Hey, what's that for?" "Just look at yourself" "Don't touch, it's autographed by Wang Chien-ming" "What?" "Yao Ming?" "I like Yao Ming a lot too" "Every day my fellow guards and I would play basketball together" "You're really a guard?" "Senior security guard" "I even teach Taichi every day" "I'm warning you" "You take me back to my tour right now" "Or I'm going to be forced to show you my Taichi" "I'm looking for your tour group too" "You said you're on a mission" "What are you looking for?" "Is this your boy?" "That's ME!" "You looked better as a child" "That's my bro" "I'm the OTHER one" "Your brother?" "My best bud who used to work with me" "So that means your partner" "That's right, we need partners in our jobs" "He's gone" "Out of the business?" "Well, must be because of you" "Don't tell me this" "How can I call the cops?" "Just keep quiet, help me find the guy" "Don't I know I'm losing the 250k guarantee?" "Don't I know I'm losing my license?" "Yes, lost at the Museum, I already sent out his photo" "I'm dying here" "Please just help me find him" "Excsue me" "Is this someone's luggage?" "I gotta hang up, a tourist is causing trouble" "Just help" "Hey, lady, I beg you" "The bus is still in motion" "Please sit down, it's dangerous" "Are we missing someone?" "What?" "No, no, no, not at all" "Everybody is still here" "Please sit down right now" "But there was the guy in the red shirt" "What guy in the red shirt?" "I thought I saw..." "It's your eye that's red." "Sit down or your eyes are going to get redder" "Very dangerous, sit down right now" "What now?" "Do you need help?" "Help?" "Just get back in the car" "Can you do it or not?" "There's a saying" "At home, rely on parents;" "traveling, rely on friends" "If you need my help, just say the word" "Push" "You want to help?" "Then push" "Push the car" "I can push, no problem" "But your attitude is the problem" "I'm older than you, you should respect me" "Just push the car" "Just because I help doesn't mean you can order me around" "Attitude is the key to working together" "With your kind of attitude" "PUSH the damn car!" "Hey, look, this isn't working" "We gotta synchronize" "Listen to me" "I say "Turn"" "Then you turn on the engine" "Turn!" "I'm still here" "Slow...slow down" "Not yet" "I'm not in the car yet!" ""Headquarters"" "Why don't you pick up?" "Tell me honestly" "What are you looking for?" "None of your business" "Look at yourself" "You have no qualms ordering people around" "But when I ask you a question, you never answer" "How did your parents raise you?" "My parents raised me just fine" "None of your business" "How is it none of my business?" "I got lost from my tour because of you" "Whose fault is it?" "Seriously, man to man, what are you looking for?" "Family heirloom" "You could've shared with me earlier" "How about this?" "You help me find my tour group" "Then I'll help you find your heirloom" "Deal?" "Sir" "Have you seen a tour group from China?" "Look around you, they're everywhere" "Hey" "How can you eat at a time like this?" "This boss is really a nice guy" "Treats me to sausage" "Here's one for you, you want it?" "That looks like my group's bus" "It is my bus!" "Let's get in the jeep" "It's faster" "It's right there" "Sit tight" "I'm..." "I'm still a virgin" "Easy" "Hey hey!" "Stop!" "Stop the bus right now!" "Crazy bitch..." "Almost there" "Stop!" "Stop the bus!" "Take the wheel!" "What?" "No!" "No!" "No!" "I can't do it" "My dearest guests and customers" "What you're looking at now" "Ocean is a popular street performance group" "They are auditioning for the X Factor" "Because they all love Britney Spears" "Hey, is this yours?" "But I still like Simon Cowell best" "He's my number one!" "Hello, 91 1 ?" "Drive!" "No!" "I haven't driven in years" "Get your hands off me!" "Dearest guests" "Because you are from Great China" "To serve you is my greatest honor" "What does the bus driver live on?" "I highly recommend" "President's Green Tea" "Try it!" "Stop touching my ass" "Where are you going?" "Watch out" "Did you hear anything?" "Nothing" "Just an illusion" "Who are you?" "Weren't you outside just now?" "What are you doing inside?" "Don't be nervous, everyone, stay calm" "I gotta talk to my girlfriend" "We just had a fight" "What were you doing outside?" "Proposing" "Wow, crazy things people do for love..." "Proposing death?" "Get closer!" "Miss, this case belongs to me, please return it" "Mister, who's your girlfriend?" "I have excellent ears" "I heard what you said, ok?" "Prove that this case belongs to you" "And why is Ocean with you?" "I..." "Watch out, they're up there!" "Up there!" "No time to explain" "No!" "Bro" "Be careful!" "Let go!" "Stop kicking!" "Don't drop it!" "Get outta here!" "Where's the painting?" "Now you're gonna get it" "Mr. Ocean, I can't believe you're driving in Taiwan" "What are you doing?" "Get back here right now!" "Don't' go!" "If you don't come back, I'm ruined" "You asshole!" "Can they perform it one more time?" "You think it's easy to coordinate a show like that?" "Sorry, I lost my cool" "It's ok" "Please find it in your hearts to forgive me" "Are you all right?" "What's going on?" "Where did Ocean go?" "He should be fine" "I will bring him back, don't worry" "Sorry, I made a prank call" "It's all a misunderstanding" "Our tour group is doing fine" "Everyone is very happy and enjoying the tour" "And they love me as their perfect guide" "Of course, not a single person is missing" "Let me tell you" "Leaving the tour is a serious offense" "He's a simple guy" "Please don't get him in any trouble" "I took photos" "I've got evidence for you right here" "Don't tell anyone about him being missing" "I promise to bring him back" "Don't' worry" "Can I borrow" "Can I borrow your phone?" "Hello?" "Where did you drive off to?" "Is my tour group still there?" "Yes." "Look in the jeep for the case" "Oh yes, it's here" "So this is your heirloom" "That's right, keep it safe" "Where are you?" "Wait, let me see" "I'm in the mountains" "There is a beef noodle shop here" "Stay where you are, I'm coming over" "Stay there" "Hello?" "He hung up" "My number's in there" "Stay in touch" "Have a seat" "What do you want?" "What did you say?" "Foreigner" "I said what do you want today?" "What's good here?" "My specialty is beef noodles" "Spicy, non-spicy, you choose" "You decide, whatever's good" "Sure, coming right up" "Thanks" "Did you like the food?" "Great, it's the best beef noodles I ever had" "Thanks" "That's 2500 dollars" "How much?" "2500 dollars" "So expensive!" "I left my wallet in the jeep" "You think I'm a fool?" "Fool!" "You think you can get freebies?" "Calm down, my money's in the car" "It's in the car" "Easy" "I have money" "It's there" "Where's the money?" " Where is it?" " Where's the money?" "My money's gone" "Where is it?" "It got stolen" "No money?" "Tear the car apart" "No no, don't do that" "I am not trying to con you" "Con me?" "Gentlemen talk with words, not with hands" "Won't fight?" "Let's talk this through" "Talk?" "Everybody, freeze!" "I know Chinese kung-fu" "Stop!" "Why do you always get into trouble?" "Bro, you came right on time" "We can fight them off together" "You got a friend" "We got friends too" "Coming~~~" "Who wants a fight?" "Awesome!" "Where's the painting?" "The painting?" "It was there just now" "My wallet got stolen too" "Wait!" "There was a guy with a mole on his nose" "He looked really shady" "I almost got killed trying to get that case and you're here eating beef noodles" "What kind of loser security guard are you?" "Don't blame it all on me" "How did I know they were going to steal my stuff?" "If I hadn't met you" "I'd be enjoying Alishan by now" "Alishan!" "Alishan!" "Alishan!" "Don't kick my pineapple cakes" "You are a loser guard with loser Taichi" "Loser Taichi!" "You wanna take me on?" "Bring it!" "Fuck!" "You..." "Get back here" "If you are a man get back here and fight" ""Little Mermaid"" "One more time" "You're back" "And you're flirting with girls, Little Mermaid" "Who is calling me?" "Stud!" "Step out of the car, handsome" "Come on" "Get out" "What do you want?" "Your friend wanted info worth two betelnut packs" "I'll pay for three" "I found out where the thieves are" "Really?" "Thanks to this girl" "Stop messing with him, Ma" "You're her mother?" "We don't look alike?" "You do" "Of course we do" "I'll give you two free nuts" "Please don't" "No nuts, then how about kisses?" "I'll take the nuts!" "One more for you" "Don't you Taiwanese all eat betelnuts?" "Do you eat Peking Duck every day?" "I'm very sorry to have lost your heirloom" "Why don't you call your fellow guards and look for it together" "Them?" "Better to depend on myself" "Look bro, I hate to say this but you really need to change you're attitude" "Don't be so proud" "Even your best buddy left you because he couldn't stand you anymore" "How can you say that?" "Do you know why he left?" "Easy, easy" "Slow down" "Your friend came here to work?" "It's a nice quiet cemetery" "And your friend is..." "This..." "Yes, he really left me" "He was my best buddy" "Now he's here" "He died?" "Sorry, I didn't mean to blurt it out" "I didn't know" "A few years ago, we were on a mission" "I followed orders and stayed at my position" "instead of taking charge of the situation" "And my friend got killed" "From then on, I swore to work alone" "It's not that I don't trust a partner" "But I'm afraid of losing another one" "I guess I'm also lost from my group" "But at least I won't get anybody else hurt" "Right?" "I think you are too hard on yourself" "If your friend knew about this" "He wouldn't want you to always go at it alone" "The Chinese word "man" is written this way" "One stroke on the left, one to the right" "Supporting each other up, that's the meaning of "man"" "What's that you've been wearing around your neck?" "Let me show you this medallion" "My ancestors were imperial guards who fought foreign army in the Qing dynasty" "This was a present from the emperor" "Wow, such an honor" "What martial arts do you do?" "Taichi" "Well, I just do a bit" "I'm nothing like my ancestors" "I thought about serving in the army so as to bring honor to the family but you know I've got this handicap" "My bad left ear" "Brother" "I hope you can bless your best friend to find his family heirloom and bless me to get back to my group" "Sorry for the earlier offense" "Here's my respect" "Pineapple cakes..." "I will return to my tour" "The girl told me yesterday to ask for Brother Biao" "He knows where everyone is" "Young men" "You're not doing it right" "Let me show you the correct way to pray" "You go that way, we'll look on both sides" "All right" "Ma'am" "What do you want?" "Is there a guy with a bowl haircut and a mole on his nose in this village?" "I don't understand you" "I mean" "Sorry, sorry." "He's crazy" "Let's go" "I found the place" "You did?" "Where?" "What's this?" "Transformers" "Seriously?" "Stop clapping, come in and look" "Look for the guy" "Great dance" "He's the one" "Stop right there" "Stop" "Third Price..." "Princes" "Take that!" "Take that!" "Who are you people?" "Let me go" "Wait till you meet our boss, he'll tell you" "Get out" "You're afraid of dogs?" "No, not afraid, on the contrary..." "Get inside" "What you looking at?" "Who are you people?" "Why did you take the painting?" "Shut up!" "What the hell?" "I read faces for over 20 years" "I can tell right away you are criminals" "You look innocent, but have evil thoughts" "Nothing good can come out of you" "No wonder you committed such a crime" "What are you talking about?" "Yeah, what are you talking about?" "Take me as a fool?" "Show it to them" "You may fool others but not Gangster Wu" "You did it, and now it's all on tape" "Clear as day" "You took the national treasure" "Shameless idiots" "Hey, isn't that you?" "If I were in my younger days with a bad temper" "I would've fed you to the dogs" "You scum!" "I don't even know him" "Take them away" "Boss, I'll take the painting upstairs" "Here" "Thank you for retrieving the painting" "This is from our Museum" "Please accept our gratitude" "No way" "I can't possibly take this" "I'm just trying to be a good citizen" "Take it back" "What do I do with those two thieves?" "Someone will arrest them later" "Don't worry" "We need to take the painting back now" "Hope you will come to the exhibition" "Of course" "People who work at the museum really are different" "Real high-class" "Will you stop looking at the girls?" "Didn't you say it was a heirloom?" "How do you explain that video?" "Dumbass, can't you see it was a training drill?" "What?" "Drill!" "What did you say?" "I said it was a drill" "I don't believe anything you say anymore" "What are you doing?" "Stop moving, stop twisting" "I'll just do it myself" "What are you..." "Crazy!" "Why jump when you can just climb down" "Slow down" "Wait for me" "What is in that box?" "You better fess up!" "Boss" "That car just went by" "Yes, that's the one!" "It drove by!" "Those foreigners just go on Highway 78" "Repeat" "Highway 78" "Hmm... whyaretheygoingtoKaohsiung?" "That tall foreign guy is the boss of those two women" "They are international art thieves" "We've been watching them for a long time" "They stole a 400 year old painting being exhibited for the first time" "400 years" "That's priceless!" "I was hoping to find it before tomorrow's exhibition" "But now we have nothing" "Both halves are stolen and they've framed me" "What?" "!" "Why didn't you tell me the truth before?" "Why did you say it's a family heirloom?" "You little man" "Don't be so proud, ok?" "The meaning of "man" is to support each other" "Fine, everything is my fault, ok!" "Excellent" "Look, let's not get into a big fight now" "See this?" "My ancestors were imperial guards" "But me?" "I'm just a regular Joe in Beijing" "Even so, I dare not lose my family's face" "A national treasure's been stolen" "Ask not what your country does for you; ask what you do for your country" "Especially since we are both security guards" "Stop moping about like a girl" "As long as we work together" "There will be a way" "I am a top security guard" "Ace" "Cheer up!" "Take this" "It's cool and brand new" "Now you're cool" "I knew you wouldn't get far" "So tell me the truth, what really happened?" "I almost got the treasure back, but now it's gone" "Thanks to you, what do you want now?" "So you're really not the thieves?" "A misunderstanding" "This is a serious misunderstanding" "Hear me out" "I've been with this guy for two days" "I guarantee upon my life that he is not a criminal" "Those foreigners are behind this theft" "That's right" "Get lost" "Listen to me" "Videotapes... don't tell the truth anymore" "That's right" "I read faces for so many years but I never read foreigners' faces" "That's right" "We are all on the same team, we shouldn't fight" "This is the work of Z and his group" "They have staged heists in the past" "A celebrity thief" "Wait" "Didn't you say we looked innocent on the outside but on the inside, we're..." "One of a kind" "You didn't hear me correctly" "How did you know that I have a bad ear?" "See?" "I do know how to read people" "Listen, young men" "I lost the treasure" "So I will be responsible for getting it back" "From now on" "All my crew along the west coast of Taiwan will work for you" "Brotherhood" "Awesome!" "What does that mean?" "It's a compliment" "Right" "Awesome-ness!" "Dearest guests from China 1 23, you come to Taiwan" "Taiwan has a famous Alishan" "That's right, here we are, so very close but since you saw it on pixel-perfect TV" "We'll just drive right by and see Alishan through the window and let's go straight to Cape No.7 and write some love letters isn't this a great idea?" "So romantic and touching?" "Agree?" "Agree?" "Dearest guests, stay most calm" "There's a little change in plan" "If you don't like to hear me sing" "Not a problem" "Let me present to you my" "Taiwan one-man show" "Welcome to Taiwan Idol" "You can sing, but can you dance?" "Can you?" "This is Ryan Seacrest here" "I will teach you how to be an idol too" "Keep an eye out for me" "Three people" "In a car" "License plate 51 3503" "That's right" "Just shut up and listen" "If you see a man and two women in a car" "License plate 51 3503" "Just stop the car right away" "Gotta go" "Hello?" "It's me" "See three foreigners in a car" "Call me, ok?" "Another problem?" "No!" "No!" "No!" "The thing is" "Besides the treasure" "I have a wallet that was also stolen by your people" "What?" "That money is from my fellow guards for me to buy them Taiwan souvenirs" "Thief" "What did I teach you?" "How can you embarrass me like that?" "This is it, right?" "Yes, thank you" "You!" "I tried to change you with this mole" "Here" "Here's another good luck mole" "See if it can make you a better person" "And the hair" "Are you still listening to the Beatles?" "Get a perm!" "What flavor do you want?" "Mango" "Make sure my boat's on time" "The car you're looking for just drove into the harbor" "Let me know what else to do" "Thanks for your big help" "I'll take over from here" "That's all for today" "Come visit me on the west coast some day" "You hear that?" "I think the thieves are trying to deport form the Kaohsiung harbor" "I will go and stop them" "Ocean, you are here on vacation" "This has nothing to do with you" "Return to your tour" "It's just gonna get more dangerous" "I don't want you to get hurt" "Brother" "Since we call each other brothers now" "Don't say a thing" "You have that girl's number, right?" "Call her and get my tour guide on the phone" "Do it" "Hello?" "Are you ok?" "Yes, are you and Ocean ok?" "Give the phone to the tour guide" "Ocean wants to talk to him" "Hold on" "Idol, here" "Hello?" "Mr. Ocean" "Didn't I tell you that our No. 1 rule is never to wander off alone" "Where are you?" "What are you doing?" "Get back here right now" "Do you have any idea the trouble you're in?" "Idol" "Listen to me" "I know leaving the group is a serious offense" "I'm sorry for all the trouble I've brought you" "But please believe me" "I didn't do anything illegal in Taiwan" "I just have one last thing to help and then I'll return tomorrow" "But" "If I never return due to some accident" "Well, then I guess I owe you one" "I'll pay you back in the next life" "You can't pay me back" "You know what you cost me?" "Wandering off like this?" "250 grand, not 25 dollars!" "I have a family to support" "Can you stop trying to bankrupt me?" "Stop destroying me?" "I'm dying here, again and again" "Will you please come back?" "Instantly, promptly, immediately." "Right now!" "Shut up!" "You offend my friends, you offend me" "Why are you harassing him over such a small amount?" "Can't you handle it?" "You shut up, who the hell are you?" "Don't know me?" "Listen carefully" "I'm Gangster Wu" "Gangster Wu?" "As a tour guide, I've met all kinds" "Stop your bull!" "Listen" "I had a dog once, I called him Little Gangster" "Don't you dare play with fire" "What goes around comes around" "If you ever cross my path again you'll know what to expect" "Hello?" "Are we bros?" "If we are, then I'm in" "You're even wearing my shirt" ""Go kick some ass!"" "My bro" "Why can't I go in?" "Not allowed" "Calling back up, back up!" "Wanna come in?" "Cowboy?" "You got a gang?" "Call them, call them" "You stinky little losers!" "Go and stall them" "There's a car behind" "Leave it" "Let it pass" "Here, this way" "Just leave it" "It's following us?" "I didn't mean it" "I got one of them" "It's me!" "Watch out!" "Awesome!" "Watch out" "This way this way" "Lock it up" "How?" "Don't walk so fast" "Do you know where they are?" "My ass" "Brother" "Bro, you all right?" "Watch his feet" "You think I don't know that?" "So you're the traitor?" "No wonder the tapes got leaked" "Hey, don't call me that" "I only make 50k as a security guard and not even a bonus last year" "I got bills to pay" "What can I do?" "So you're a security guard too?" "You certainly make more money than I ever have" "But I'd never sell a national treasure for money" "Stop wasting time" "You be careful" "Don't fret, I'll help you find him" "West... yourwest" "He's to your west" "Didn't I tell you to watch his feet?" "East side, east side, he's coming from the east" "Don't you understand me?" "What's with east and west, can't you just say right or left?" "Sorry, that's how we say it in Beijing" "Left, he's on the left" "Didn't you say Left?" "I meant my left" "You stay out of this" "I'll handle it myself" "All right" "Yes" "You make 50k" "I only make half that" "I NEVER had a bonus" "You cut my benefits" "Talk behind my back" "Never give me tips" "Make me work overtime" "Traitor" "Here I come" "Stop" "I'll cut you guys 30%" "No way!" "What are you doing?" "Hot" "I'm hot too" "Now way!" "I'll count to three, and we'll jump" "You are too crazy 1 ..." "2..." "Don't 3..." "Bro, why are you doing this to me?" "Why?" "WHY?" "W-H-Y?" "Bro" "The most important thing in life, is to be happy" "Why aren't we there yet?" "Bro" "Bro, you all right?" "I'm fine" "Stop" "Wait" "You stay put" "I'll show him my Taichi" "Bro" "Thank you" "How come I don't feel any pain?" "What happened to me?" "Are you ok?" "It's not how much you hit, but how much you can take" "Watch out!" "Ocean!" "Ocean!" "Bro!" "Wake up, Ocean" "Bro!" "I knew I shouldn't have friends" "I always get them hurt" "I'm so sorry, so sorry" "So sorry" "Bro" "What the... ?" "I thought you were a tough guy but you cry like a girl" "Wait for me" "I'm hurt" "Help me up" ""Guard work together and retrieve national treasure"" "Dearest guests" "Time flies when you're having fun" "Now is the time to say goodbye" "Here's my business card for all of you" "Bro" "I'm right here" " Ocean" " Wow, you're late" "These souvenirs are for you" "What can I say?" "You still haven't visited many places or tried much of our food" "Bro" "Stop right there" "Come visit me in Beijing" "You treated me to Taiwan beer" "I'll treat you to Chinese wine" "We will get properly drunk" "Count me in" "You guys chat" "Miss Jane" "Nice to meet you" "You look nice" "Wait" "I told you I can hear everything, right?" "Including what your heart is saying, ok?" "Bro, is that ok now?" "Yes, it's ok" "Get lost" "Closer, closer" "Brother Wu" "I will really miss you" "If you come to Taiwan again remember to visit me" "Brother Wu" "Of course" "What are you doing?" "Old age eyes" "So you're the famous Idol who gave my friends crap for 250k?" "Dumbass!" "And who are you?" "Who am I?" "Who?" "Gangster Wu!" "Gangster or Lobster or Ghostbuster" "You're the Wu who almost lost a national treasure" "I know all about it" "Boss" "Idol offered us a grand tour of Taiwan" "Times are changing fast" "Get with the program" "Let's go" "You..." "Being a tour guide is a better living" "I'm heading off" "I'll wait for you in Beijing" "Take care" ""Jane Zhang's Photography Exhibition"" "Senior Guard Ocean Ni had a very successful trip to Taiwan" "To honor his achievement" "We are promoting him to a one-room apartment" "Now you can look for a wife" "Ocean, Ocean runs so deep!" "Ocean, Ocean I'd love to keep!" "You know, I already have a place to live" "Why don't you just give it to me in cash and I'll share with the rest of the guards and keep everyone happy" "Also, I wanna ask" "Can I please take off the sponsor's red shirt now?" "Rise"