"Just go to sleep." "A lovely approach." "He's considering it now." "I presume that a player like..." "Sand wedge or intermediate pitching wedge." "Oh, very exciting." "He's lining up the shot." "Look at me." "Hmm?" "I'm not standing for this." "Sorry?" "You keep my soul in a dungeon." "I'm leaving." "Jack?" " Jack." " If you leave me, I'll throw her." "You think that I won't, hmm?" " Please." " Do you think I won't?" "!" "I won't leave." "I won't leave you." "I'm sorry." "Don't ever do that again." "Don't ever leave me." "Don't ever do that again." "J' All things bright and beautiful I" "J' All creatures great and small I" "J' All things wise and wonderful I" "J' The Lord God made them all." "I" "I invite you to be seated at this time." "Oh, that's a very nice touch." "So maybe he can make a par." "And at worse from there you'd think he could stay his point total." "Now here we find him with a 7-iron at this par-3 hole." "I don't know if there was a problem with him slipping' with his right foot there, but definitely a pull." "He obviously had the thought in his head that he needed to give it a little bit extra, and he's found himself in a difficult spot." "All the expectations he had coming into this"," " Hello?" " Jack." "Betsy." "Your brother slipped away." "Oh oh, finally out of his misery." " Yes, he is." " Oh, I know, I know." "And how many times did I hear, "Why can't you be like your brother Bobby"?" "If I had a nickel for every time that was said to me..." "I'd be a rich man today." "That scar on his forehead that he had, he always had a story for it, but it was me." "I threw a hammer at Mr. Perfect when I was eight." "He never told though." "He covered for the people he loved." "That's how he was and I loved him for that." "And I wanted to be like him." "Everything" "I just want to say that..." "If it wasn't for Bobby, I'd..." "I" " I don't know..." "Where I would've wound up." "He taught me how to live, what was right." "I'm gonna miss him." "He lived right." "He lived right." "He was..." "What more could you s- want people to say about you?" "All throughout Scripture it talks about God being a just God." "I mean, I just read the parable about the unjust judge, where the woman kept coming and coming and saying..." "Caring, loving, forgiving..." "I'm wondering if you concur with what you've heard so far?" "I think that the choices, the idea of free will, and the fact that we have freedom of choice..." "The reality of the times we live in, this notion that- this angst that a lot of people are feeling in this country, that we've gone through some sort of fundamental transformation..." ""Barack Obama earlier today, crediting his so-called stimulus package that he signed four or five months ago, as "putting cash into the pockets of taxpayers. "" "If you're a taxpayer in the Detroit area who got cash in your pocket from the stimulus plan," "I'd love to hear from ya, and you can also check in via the internet, but we would love to hear from you personally." "Kevin in Warren." "We go to Kevin." "Kevin thanks so much for calling." "Welcome." "Hi, Pam." "Thanks." "No, it's true." "With God is my witness, I've changed." "With Jesus and my family..." "Oh my God, I'm sorry for what I've done." "I mean, I robbed a goddamn liquor store with a toy gun." "What kinda- what kinda idiot does that?" "Warden wants to see you." "Hi, Allie." " Hi, Mitch." "Janice." " Jack." " What's up?" " Shut the door, Jack." "This Deshawn Mackey guy." "~ This is yours?" "Your report, right?" " Yeah." "Yeah." "Why?" "It's an incompetent mess, Jack." "I mean, look, I know your head's already out on the golf course, but this is a travesty of proper casework here." " I got ya." " You got me." "Here." "Learn from the master of understatement." " Absolutely." " Keep 'em brief." "Now I need to get Janice up to speed before you're out the back door, so let's pass all your indeterminates eligible off to her." "Yeah yeah, of course, but I'd like to stay on my currents, if I can see them through to review- is that okay?" "Yeah, if you're willing." " I would like to." "Thank you." " Yeah." " We're good." " Okay." "Oh, hey, I'm sorry." "Excuse me?" "Your brother- I just recently heard, I'm sorry." "Thank you." " Okay." " Yeah." "S" " Stone." "Hmm?" "No, I-I'm Stone." "I mean, I know it say "Gerald" in the file, but I'm just saying I prefer Stone." "Gerald Creeson." "So what's Stone, like a nickname?" "That's something from here?" "No." "Oh no, man." "Fuck all these assholes." "Yo, that's what my people call me." "You know, people who know me." "Look, are we just gonna, like- are you just gonna tick the boxes and shit?" "I mean, can we- can we talk straight?" "I mean, you gonna help me out or what?" "'Cause I, you know, I don't think" " I deserve to be up in here no more." " Let's just slow down." "Slow slow down." "I've done a long bid, man." "Three more years ain't gonna" "Slow down." "Let's~let's talk about what got you here." "~ You want to tell me about that?" " it's right there in front of you." "~ Why you want to talk about that again?" " 'Cause now you're mine." "You moved up." "And just 'cause I like to chat." "All these scrubs in here, you know, these short-timers and meatballs, they're like, they're all innocent, right?" "Yeah." "But at least I admit it." "You know, I copped to what I did right away, and-and now I'm lookin' forward, man." "I got a job lined up and I'm sayin', why I got to talk about that shit every fuckin' time?" "'Cause I want to hear your side of it, that's why." "You know what?" "Just fuck this shit." "Fuck you too." "~ I ain't got time for this bullshit." " Hey, son" "No, you're just settin' them up so they can flop me, man." "So you write what you're gonna write and let's just get on with it, man." "~ 'Cause I'll take the flop." " Hey, son." "Stone." " Go ahead, max me, max me." " Son, calm down." "You don't think I'll do it, I'll see that max standing" " on my fucking head, man." " Stone!" "I'll see you outside before you see me, bitch." "Stone!" "In about two fucking seconds you're gonna go in the hole, and your file is gonna go to the bottom of my pile." "You understand?" "You see that door in front of you?" "You know where it goes- back." "You want to go back?" "Be my guest." "You want to go forward, you want to walk out of here, you want to find that door?" "Me, I'm that door." "And you will go through me." "If I ask you a question about the weather, you better fucking answer it or go back and I'll see you in three years." " You got it?" " Yeah." "~ Then sit the fuck down." " All right." "Well, we just shootin' the shit." "I like her, man." "She's hard." "Okay." "All right, look, look, this is a process." "We talk." "We're not friends, but just pretend we're friends, okay?" "Relax, just-just talk, that's all, and then maybe we both get what we want, okay?" "~ Okay, let's pretend." " Okay." "You're married." "Yeah." "Okay, that's good." "How long are you married?" "Nine years, man- eight of it up in this shit." "It's right in the file, man." "I don't want" "Let's talk about your wife." " Lucetta?" " Mm-hmm, yeah." " Has she come up here?" "You seen her?" " No." " She's a dime, dawg." " What's a dime?" "Perfect 10, man." "She's fine." "I'll tell you, between you and me, she's-she's a alien." "Alien?" "What do you mean, like an illegal?" "No, she ain't illegal, man." "She's whiter than you." "No, she's like- she's like a- she's an alien from another world, man." "She visit you much?" "Picnics most Saturdays?" "I don't want no picnic, man." "I miss my dick in her fuckin' ass." "You know, I miss her suckin' me till I can't take no more." "I mean, she's crazy." "She'll do anything." "Fuck her tits, come in her face, she'll just blink and keep on laughing, man." "It's- she- look, if we gonna talk about Lucetta, you better watch out, 'cause I'm gonna give you some pictures in your head gonna keep you up nights, man." "Oh man." "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." "I" " I got a mouth, I know." "I apologize, man." "You're givin' me that look, and I feel like you go down here and that's the end of this shit." "Look, I don't want no beef with you." "I just want to be vegetarian." "Is that your wife?" "You're married?" "Yeah." "~ A long time?" " 43 years." "Get the fuck out." "Man, that's true love, huh?" "That's great, and after 43 years and you still get it on and everything?" "~ Excuse me?" " No, I'm really curious about this." "It's like, say, I love my lady, right, but, you know, I wonder sometimes, like how you gonna do when the skin starts to go to the crepe, you know what I'm sayin'?" "I mean, what do- how does that work for you?" "Like you get hip to Viagra, so you can like hammer nails with it?" "Listen listen, look, I don't talk with anybody about my wife like that." "I ain't talkin' about your wife." "I'm sayin', for me, you know, I've been locked up a long time." "You don't need much more than two pumps and a swirl to get it done." "I don't consider this polite conversation." "I ain't tryin' to be rude, okay?" "I really want to know where does that go?" "Or where do you put it, if you- you get what I'm sayin'?" "I want to know how it works for you, how you keep a lid on that." "We're not- we're not talking about me." "We're not talking about me, okay?" "Man looks on the outward appearance." "God looks on the heart." "And certainly the heart of a man does matter, because out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks..." "Only in the choices that God decides to present to us." "Well, no, I'm not saying that." "I'm saying that I just believe that we're automatons and here's the deal:" " I did not choose to be born..." " This is very very serious." "...and I cannot choose to be born again." "She's four- can you believe it?" "I had no choice in that matter whatsoever, and yet" " there are so many people that..." " Where have you gone?" "...think they have a choice in the matter of their spiritual rebirth and their spiritual formation." "The fact of the matter is, a seed is planted and conception takes place," " which you had nothing to do with." " Amen." "All Voices Under God, WDDL, will continue here right after these very important messages." "Look, we was high as shit and we were lookin' for money." "You know?" "My poppy hears us." "Him and Teach have words." "Poppy goes and gets his gun." "And I was like, "Fuck this." "I don't want no part of this,"" "and I went outside." "So then, Teach done what he done and then the house got burnt." "It was- you know, it was terrible." "I was like a terrible mistake that I made." "I was tragic and it was a long time ago and I've paid" " I've paid..." "With a lot of hard time." "And I just think, you know, I'm so ready to be out and start my life again, and well, so what- you know, what-what-what can we do to make that happen?" "How can you help me make that happen?" "Well, we'll see." "We were just getting started, so" "A lot of good things have happened for me in here, you know." "I did my GED like that, man." "I held down this job- Textiles Unit, number one position the last two years." "I'm goin' home to my wife." "She's got a spot for me, you know," "Mount Elliot Chrysler, job lined up." " I'm-I'm going, you know." " Yeah, whose idea was it?" "Lucetta- she knows the branch manager at Mount Elliot." "No no, not your job." "Whose idea was it to go to your grandparent's?" " What?" " Whose idea was it?" "I told you- I told you it was Teach." "Teach, you know." "Like I said, I wasn't even" "I was" " I went outside the house." "Yeah, but you didn't stop them, did you?" "~ Stop 'em what?" " From killing your grandparents." "You-you-you ain't gonna do it, man." "You're not gonna" "You don't give a fuck, man." "Shit." "I was outside," "Teach" " Teach come out, and I didn't even know what he'd done until he told me." "Teach testified to that, man." "He- that's why I didn't even catch the rap for- for manslaughter." "I got accessory and arson." "I've done eight out of 10-15." "I mean, what- what more do you want from me?" "Okay, so, let's make today an extra special day." "Let's do one nice thing for someone else, but not tell anyone else that we did it, okay?" "Win with the seventh deuce, it's 10 bucks for everybody." "Win both ways with the seven deuce," " 20 bucks a head." " Jacks wild?" "Jacks definitely not wild." "Marsha, stay in?" "Hello?" " Hi, is this Jack Mabry's place?" " Excuse me?" "Oh, my name is Lucetta Creeson." "My husband's..." "Excuse me, I couldn't understand what" "~ Can I speak to Jack Mabry?" " Well, this is Mrs. Mabry." "Okay, can I speak to Jack?" "You need my husband." "I can give him a mess" " Hey, you get ahold of him?" " She was a little short." "You know?" "Like, I don't know." "Like she didn't want to talk or something." "Why-why-why you talkin' to her?" "Hey, Tommy, Tommy, we don't bite." "Huh-uh, no biting, okay?" "Do you understand what I'm sayin'?" "I need you to do this for me right now." "Right now." "Don't let it slide." "Okay, I will." "Okay?" "Call him tonight." "Call him tomorrow." "Call him tomorrow night." "Call him the day after." "Call him the day after tomorrow night." "That's what I'm getting at is do you believe what you did was wrong?" "What-what d'you think, because I grew up westside that like I'm one of these socio-delinquent types, don't know the difference between right and wrong?" "You want me to tell you about my bad childhood and shit?" "I don't know." "Did you have one?" "Well, you know, at the time, I thought a lot of shit was normal." "It was definitely unhealthy, but on the same token, you know, I didn't think" "I was a bad person to begin with." "So, you know, I mean, what, you want to know if I'm gonna light any more grandparents on fire?" " Are you?" " No." "~ You got any more?" " Yeah, I got one." "Yeah well, try to make a better effort with that one." "I'm not trying to be flip." "I think I deserve to be free, I do." "Why, because you did the time?" "That's it, you're ready?" "Now you're a clean slate?" "I'm clean as anybody, man." "I'm clean as you." "Well, maybe, maybe not." "Seriously, let me ask you something, you know." "Why are you- why are you- why are you gonna sit there, like, asking me these questions like you never done nothin'?" "I mean, you know, why do you get to walk around free and I don't?" "I wasn't convicted of a crime." "Oh, come you never did anything bad?" "Never did anybody no wrong, had to be forgiven for nothin'?" "No, never broke the law." "What, you never got a speeding ticket?" "You never backed somebody up in a bar fight or something?" "Shit, Vietnam you never killed some kid- you carry that with you?" "You step out on your wife, you fuck that little 15~year~old who looked at you sideways?" " Okay okay." " No, come on, man!" "Come on!" "How long you get to keep judgin' a person for one had thing they done?" "No matter how much I paid, I gotta keep eatin' shit with you?" "For how long?" "That ain't right." "It ain't." "I mean, I'm beggin' you, man." "I'm beggin' you." "I'm a person." "I'm a person." "Look at my record, you know." "Look at- look at what I've done in here." "I mean, I'm different than when I come in here, man." "I've grown a lot." "I'm like fuckin' reborn, man." "What does that mean to you, being reborn?" "What?" "What does that mean to you?" "Hi." "Yeah, I'm back." "~ Hey, Mrs. Creeson." " Hey, Jake." "Thanks." "Bye, guys." "Creeson!" "Oh, the rows look so nice." "I like 'em thick, baby." "~ Yeah?" " It looks really good." " I've been using that mousse you sent." " Yeah?" "'Cause Crystal said you put the rag on before you go to sleep, and when you wake up they're still all clean and nice- they look really good." "They look tight." "You look so fucking good." "I miss you so much." "What have you got to tell me?" "I mean..." "Well, I called him and he didn't call me back, so I left another message." "Okay, that's good, but you know you got to get with him person to person." " I'm on it." "Baby, I'm on it." " One on one, you know what I'm saying?" "I gotta have you with me on it." "I can't do this by myself." "Anything." "I would do anything for you, you know that, right?" "Yeah." "Okay okay." "Baby, I wore something special for you." "Did you?" "What did you wear?" " Nothing." " Oh God." "You're killin' me." "Oh no." "Okay okay okay." " What?" " This is too much." "No no." "Come on." "No no, I'm sorry." "Just come on." "Come here, come here." "Honey?" "I can't get no ticket." "I can't get a ticket, you understand, right?" "I'm too close." " Baby." "Baby." " Yeah." "Yeah." "Okay, I'm so close." "~ What am I gonna do?" " It's gonna happen." "~ I can't do much more of this." " Don't worry." "I can't." "I ain't gonna make it." "I'm serious, Lucetta." "I just think I want- like I want to kill myself." "You don't even joke like that, okay?" "Don't joke." "I love you." "You want something to eat?" "I got some cream puffs and some animal crackers and some milk and stuff." ""That the Father may be glorified... "" ""... the embrace of sin, the individual achieves perfect metaphysical pitch and transforms himself into a tuning fork of God. "" "I'm trying improve myself here, you motherfuckers!" "This is Jack and Madylyn Mabry." "Please leave a message." "Hi." "Hey, this is Lucetta Creeson." "Um, I called before." "I'm Stoney Creeson's wife." "I spoke to Mrs. Mabry, but Mr. Mabry, this is for you." "I would like to talk to you about my husband." "Um, it's kind of important to us." "And I work most mornings, but- well, no, look, I could rearrange things, so whenever's good for you is fine with me." "Shit." "I wasn't done." "Who goes to sleep at 9100?" "Hi." "Mr. Mabry?" "~ Officer Mabry?" " Sorry?" "Mrs. Creeson" " I'm Stoney's wife." "Oh oh, Mrs. Creeson." "Look, call me Lucetta though, please." "You're here to see your husband?" "No, silly, I'm here to see you." "Wait, I'm sorry, didn't you get my message?" "Oh yeah, okay." "Well, there's a way to meet with family, Mrs. Creeson." "You have to go through the office for me to see you." " Oh right." " The case officer too- meet and assess the home situation." " That's-that's how we" " See, that's the thing though, sir, because, I mean, I am the home situation." " Mrs. Creeson, just call the office" " Lucetta." "Lucetta." "Just call the office and make an appointment." " That's the way you have to do it." " Can't I just talk to you for a while?" "I mean, can't we just, sort of just you and me make a date or something?" " No, we can't." " Please please." "You know how much this means to us." "If you're coming to see your husband, fine, but we can't do it any other way." "And I'm late, really." "Well, Mr. Mabry," "Mr. Mabry, I wanted to give you a little something" " my kids made in class." " Yeah, I can't accept that." " It's inappropriate." "Thank you anyway." " But it's for the birds, see?" "And they- it's a nest and they come and they take their twine and their twigs and stuff and they make their little home." "Thank you." "Okay." " Nice to meet you." " Thank you." "Okay." "What the hell is this?" "~ What's that?" " This- your wife." "What, she sent it to you?" "She gave it to me in the parking lot just now." "Wait, what, Lucetta come and find you?" "She gave that to me in the parking lot." "Don't mess with me." "I ain't lookin' for any kind of trouble with you, you know." "I hope you didn't put her up to it." "The parole board's gonna send you a flop in the mail and you won't even see them." "Lucetta does whatever the fuck she wants." "I told you, man." "She's just boisterous." "Jesus, what a week." "Hey hey, I want to see what you think about something." "You ever- you seen this?" "I found it in the library." ""Zukangor, The Sound and Life God. "" "Yeah, you know it?" "No." "They say the sound part come first." "They say the- when you experience a spiritual truth that it comes to you as a sound, that it goes through you, changes your vibration, gets you back into harmony." "Like God's tuning fork or something." "And then if you let that happen to you, then- then you get the light, or you get illumination or something." "I wouldn't know about that." "I'm an Episcopalian." "They say it starts with small things, like little sounds, little vibrations, like a-just like a buzzing electric light or rushing water or the sound of a bee or..." " Yeah?" " Yeah." "And then it grows." "But there's no priest or nothing." "it's not like a religion." "There's just this one dude named Arnold who's the Zukmaster." "They say you do this practice all by yourself." "You can- you can hear better." "You can hear God speaking to you through sounds." "What's the practice?" " They chant "Hue. "" " Hue?" " And then they listen." " For what, a bee?" "Maybe, I don't know." "But you know, the thing is they say you got to keep coming back until you pay for all your shit." "That you've got to fix it over a lot of lives, you know, until you work it all out." "Well, what about this life?" "What about answering for the things that you've done in this life?" "Shit, I know I have." "Have you?" "Yeah." "Have you?" "This is the body of Christ, given for you." "The body of Christ, given for you." "The body of Christ, given for you." " I'll be right back." " Sure." "Here, you drive home." "I'm going to talk to the pastor a minute and then I'll walk." "Okay." "Hey yo, foul, bitch!" "Damn, that's a hard foul!" "Yo, that's a foul!" "Hue..." "Man, you should've dunked it!" "Okay, I've never done this before, so- well, I mean, I come to the..." "Church every week and I really try." "And I don't know, I mean, I guess I had hoped with time it would be easier and easier and..." "And I'd be..." "My family, people close to me, it seems to come to them easily, but for me it's..." "I mean I've..." "I don't know." "I mean I've..." "Sometimes the thoughts that I have, feelings..." "But, uh, sometimes" "I just think maybe you should shoot me or something." "Well, I don't believe that that's what God wants for you." "Well, what does he want?" "I wish I had a simple answer for you." "I'm not sure what God wants for you." "Is there anything..." "There's an old Biblical passage that says..." ""Be still and know that I am God. "" "Which is a way of saying sometimes God does, um, speak to us in mysterious ways." "Off the rail!" "I said off the rail!" "Hue..." "Hello?" "Hi, this is Lucetta Creeson." "We talked last week." "I'm sorry, what is your name again?" "Lucetta Creeson." "I was just wondering if Jack was home." "I'm afraid he's still- oh no, wait, hold on." " Jack, telephone." "~ Who is it?" "Who?" "Who is it?" "A friend of yours?" " Hello." " Hey." "It's Lucetta Creeson." "Listen, I was just wondering, um, when we could meet, when we could get together." "Uh, Mrs. Creeson, I don't know how you're calling my house, but I told you to call the office." "Well, look, I'm just," "I'm not that great at offices and, you know," "I just" " I just can't be real, like, in an office, you know?" " Look, Mrs. Creeson" " Lucetta." "Mrs. Creeson, I have business with your husband." "Well, that's why I'm calling." "I mean, what, did you think I had another reason?" "Well, no, I didn't." "Maybe we could go to lunch, you could bring Mrs. Mabry too." "You know, she's got a sweet voice." "What's her first name?" "Look, I admire that you love your husband and you want to do what's right for him, but you're not helping him." "I'm telling you that right now." "Listen to me, Jack." "I do love my husband." "I love my husband so much." "And all I'm asking you is for a chance to help you see him in a different light." "I mean, how many men at that place you work at have somebody loving them like that, huh?" "Doesn't that mean something to you, a man in a position like yours?" "It-it- no, it-it does, it does." "Don't misunderstand me." "I just want him home." "I want..." "I want him so bad." "I want his arms around me." "I want him in my bed." "I miss him." "Can't I persuade you?" "Who's it gonna hurt, hmm?" "Just let me come see you, please." "Let me come see you, Jack." "I got him." "It's gonna happen, baby." "Huh." "Honey, you okay?" "I'm so fuckin' tired." "Can't you sleep?" "No, it's too loud all the time." "So noisy I can't..." "I can't get out of my head." "I can't hear nothin'." "I can't listen." "This place is startin' to mess with my head." "I'm tellin' you, I'm having these weird~ass dreams." "Poor honey." "I thought I wanted to kill myself, right?" "Thought I wanted to hang myself in the solitary." "I don't get it." "You dreamed that?" "But then I got too scared to die and I just hung there for all of eternity." "I don't want to fuckin' be here." "I don't want to fuckin' be here." "Honey." "Honey, what'd you have to eat that night?" "It must've been something." "Was it spicy?" " Shoot it!" " All right, let's go." "That's the grandson I've been tellin' you about right there." " How cute." " His eyes are so..." "I got a grandchild." "Do you really?" "Yeah." "Her name's Katie, three years old." " Cute." " Oh, yeah." "Yeah, very cute." "Does she look like you?" "Hell no." "No no no." "I bet she loves you though." " Yeah well..." " You see her much?" "They live upstate, so we don't see her that much." "Aw, that's too bad." "She's getting a divorce, my daughter." " I'm sorry." " What are you gonna do?" "People are gonna do what they're gonna do." "Are you in pain?" "Yeah, it's just my back." "Oh." "What'd you get that, playing ball or like from some war?" "No no, it's just life." "So I don't know if I can" "I don't want you to get your hopes up." "About what?" "What I can do for you, for your husband." " There's a whole system" " Have you tried magnet therapy?" "For your back, I mean. it's like these magnets that you wear and stuff." "~ Magnets?" " Yeah, it's really good." "Actually, you should come over sometime, because I got these insoles this guy sold me and I wear 'em in my shoes and I don't get tired in school or anything." "And- yeah, and sometimes" "I even put 'em under my pillow before I go to sleep." "And what does that do?" "Well, okay, you know how we're all toxic and stuff, right, with like all the microwaves and cell phones and all that weird stuff flying through the air." "So it all builds up inside of you, right, and it makes you all achy and upset- and it can give you brain tumors, really" "I mean, it kills people." "So these magnets, they detox you." " Wow, that's..." " Yeah, it's real." "I believe it." "You don't believe it?" "I don't know, I guess." "No, it's real." "I mean, look, I'm all into the body, you know, and for me if the body's feeling good, the mind just follows, you know?" "Absolutely." "Ego?" "My kids made 'em." "Now I got 'em all and I have to eat 'em." "They're nice." "They're pretty." "Eat me please." "Why not?" "I'm just eating the healthy part." "Go on, just eat the whole thing." "Creeson, what's up?" "You haven't been to chow in two days." "You got a call out to go to Medical." "Get dressed." "Hold up there." "You feel anything?" "No." "Like a tingling?" "No, I don't." "I don't think I..." "Like a pull?" "It's not dramatic, you know." "It's just- it's kind of a sense." "Yeah well, you know, maybe a little something." "Yeah." ""To what extent is my commitment to obey God based on dos and don'ts or on a true love for Him?"" "Hmm." ""In what recent circumstance was I aware of God's leading?"" "Why don't you say the blessing?" "Yeah." "Blessed O Lord... blessed 0 Lord, this food to our use, and us to Thy loving service, and..." "Make us mindful of the needs of others..." " In Christ's name, Amen." " Amen." "You lose your place?" "You want an egg?" "Sin comes naturally to us from our birth." "We-we- it's inbred in us." "We are not sinners because we sin;" "we sin because we are sinners." "Even if you lived a life of perfect righteousness, you deserve hell." "You know why?" "Because "all of our righteousnesses," Isaiah says," ""are as filthy rags. "" "You're real sweet, Jack." "You're real sweet." "Fuck me harder." "You're good, Jack." "You're a good man for helping us," "I appreciate it." "You know that nobody can know about this." "You know that, right?" "I mean nobody." "That's very important." "Whatever you want, it'll all go bad if anybody knows." "Bad for everybody, you understand that?" "Of course, silly." "What's wrong?" "You're not eating?" "You ever think about things they say go on forever?" "What?" "Things they say go on forever- like..." "What's that mean, you know?" "The sky, like, they say the sky goes on forever." "But what is that really?" "That's" "I mean, you can't see nothing you can't see, so..." "It's like a big bowl of blue above you." "You can see clouds during the day or you can see stars at night maybe, but even with a telescope you can't see forever." "So how do they know?" "Know what?" "What it is." "Eternity- how do they know?" "So- so, Jack, he said the board's gonna review the whole thing, okay?" "And they're going to take into consideration your age and, you know, your mom and all that, and the fact that you were an addict back then, um..." " hey, Stoney baby?" " Hmm?" "Look at me." "Well, I was trying to tell you about your parole." "Yeah?" "Well, you weren't listening." "Oh yeah, I'm listening." "Lam." "Okay, so Jack said, um" "You call him Jack?" "Sure." "That's good." "What's he say?" "Okay, so, um, he's gonna talk to you and he's going over the whole thing and he's gonna decide in a few days to write up his notes in your case file to submit it to the parole commission so when they go over it next week" "they're gonna see it." "isn't that great, baby?" "Honey, this could be it." "isn't that great?" "Yeah." "Didn't-didn't-didn't I do good?" "Well, look at me." "What are you doing?" "Sometimes I think the best thing is..." "Is just-just listen." "Would you stop playin'?" "Is the kingdom of heav you think it should be a peaceful kingdom" " and we should all get along?" " That's great, but is it just going" " to be a constant struggle..." " That's a tough one." "...to have the kingdom of heaven here on earth?" "Crack 53!" "Just tell me, is it the 30th or the 31st?" "I've had about enough lip from you!" "God damn it, just tell me, which one is it?" "You can button that up right now and be nice." "And I mean it." "Creeson's here." "How do ask a person to..." "To explain something that- that they experienced to where another person's got no way to relate to the whole indefiniteness of it, you know?" "You don't believe me already, do you?" "I'm not saying I don't believe you." "I just, you know, I- look, I've seen the tape, it's quite a thing." "But nothing happened to you." "I mean, you weren't involved in any way." "Yeah, look, I don't know how to even" "I'm not" "I don't know." "I" "You had, what, a profound spiritual epiphany." "Shit, man, I ain't never even heard that word before." "Look, we don't have to talk about it." "You know, it really don't matter." "Well..." "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'd like to believe in such things, but" "Like what?" "Like me?" "You believe in me?" "Sure, I'd like to believe in you too." "I mean that's why we're all here, right?" "Wow." "Okay, you know, wait, look, there were something like..." "It was just a moment." "The static, it just all went away, you know?" "And I could really hear, like I could hear clear, for real." "I don't know." "It just made me see everything different." "It made me look at my life in a different way." "It was just all of a sudden I could" " I could see that my life in here isn't empty and pointless like I thought it was before." "Family and..." "~ Look, Stone, just drop it." " Drop what?" "Well, I know what you're trying to do, but don't." "Just-just-just don't." "it's not helping." "Just stop." "Hey look, man, it don't matter to me no more." " What doesn't matter?" " I don't care about what- what you're doin' or what anybody else is tryin' to make you do." "Make me do?" "What's that?" "Nobody's trying to make me do anything." "Okay." "You should do what you think is right, okay?" "I am whatever you say I am in there, so write what you feel." "Seriously." "I mean it." "I mean, judge me how you think." " Well..." " I mean, don't get me wrong," "I want to be out, but I'm gonna wrestle with the same shit if I'm out." "And I'm gonna keep this feeling if I'm in." "So you're all good now?" "No no no." "Look, I ain't sayin' I'm all happy all of a sudden." "You know, my middle finger's been up a long time, man." "I'm not just gonna start wavin' and smilin' at people." "I'm gonna pop off." "I'm gonna lose my temper, and- and say shit and do shit that I'm gonna regret, whatever." "I just" " I just- I am who I am, you know?" "And that's okay." "You know what I'm sayin'?" "No." "No, I'm afraid I don't." "Well, I told you I couldn't explain it really." " Are you okay?" " Yeah." "My back." " I'm gonna go sleep in the other room." " Oh." "You can take great comfort in that, but that can be a false comfort." "Sometimes in the twilight of a civilization, there can be a great cultural flowering, but in reality, there are cracks in the foundation of that society and that society is doomed." "If you really want to know," "I think it's some kind of play-acting or something." "It's all bullshit?" "No." "No." "Look, Stoney's just..." "You know." "I mean, he's screwed up." "He's got weird ideas about things." "Sometimes really weird." "But, I mean, he's always been that way." "Talkin' to him, he almost seemed like..." "Like what?" "Something- really, I don't know." "Different." "No." "Look, he-'s just trying to impress you, you know, trying to do whatever it takes to get out." "Can you blame him?" " No, it's okay." " What?" "Hey, sit down." "Come on." "Come on, sit down." "Sit down." "Look, he admires you a lot, you know." "He told me he learned a lot talking to you." "Can you be straight?" "Straight as you." "Is this all just a" " I mean, just-just-just tell me what's going on." "I don't do anything I don't want to do." "I like you." "I like you, Jack." "I would never fuck you if I didn't want to." "Well, thanks." "God, you're beautiful, you know." "You're beautiful." "Thank you." "I'm not gonna come over here anymore." " You're not?" " No." "Okay." "Maybe I should just take some antidepressants or something, I don't know." " Yes you will." " What?" "It's okay though." "I don't mind when they say, "Oh no, no more,"" "'cause then I just sit back and wait." "But you'll call, won't you, or drop by?" "Like maybe late again some night, won't you?" "Oh God." "Look, I don't care if you deny it." "It's funny to me." "St-stop this now." "I think about you so much, Jack." "All day long I'm thinking about you." "I think about you at work." "Don't say that." "You're sexy, Jack, and you know if you let Stone out, we can still befriends too." "He won't know." "He won't even care." "Look, I do what I do because I'm on my own, okay?" "And I got to make my own way, so don't you want to help us?" " Don't you want to help me?" " Don't talk like that." "I can't." "it's not that simple." "You can't leave, can you?" "It's sweet." "What the hell am I doing?" "God damn it." "Oh, come on, Jack." "He's a good man at heart." "You really believe that?" "Yeah, I do." "No different than you and me." "Do you go to church?" "Hell no." "There's no such thing as God." "They called again." "They need the Creeson report." "I just sent it!" "You don't have to yell." "I'm on the intercom." "You got your RGC recommendation." "Vocational counseling, psych therapy, GED, NA, NA program." "So the board needs to decide if it's safe to let you back into the world, that you're not a danger to yourself or others." "Rehabilitated, right?" "Yeah." "You know, in my book it says that chronic neck pain comes from bein' hanged in another life." "Well, it's my back." "it's not my neck." "Well, I'm just makin' conversation." "Look, if you're not interested in the details of your hearing, we're done here." " Done?" " We're done." "~ 1-low do you mean we're done?" " My report's already sent." "We're done." "Basically they want to hear that you take responsibility for your actions." "See, the thing about that, I don't know." "About what?" "It's funny, you know, 'cause you're always askin' me about that night- how it made me feel." "You know, when my cousin come out of the house and got me and we went back inside..." "It was trippy, man, because like two minutes before," "YOU know, my poppy, he was- he was alive." "There was color in his face." "There was light in his eyes." "And then I go inside there and..." "And then I see them" "Iyin' there all over everywhere." "There was this buzzing in my ears, you know, and I thought it was just the shit that we was on, but it kept growin' and it started scarin' the shit out of me." "Teach was bouncin' off the walls, yelling' at me, "We got to do something," "You gotta help me." "We gotta handle this. "" "But all I could hear in my head was this sound." "And then, I don't know how I knew, but I just knew that there needed to be a fire." "I went to the garage." "I got the can of gasoline and I got the match and I lit it." "You ever seen a fire take control?" "It's somethin', man." "it's alive." "And [watched it take them up and start to change them." "And the only thought that came in my head was "This is awesome. "" "Awesome?" "Yeah." "It was truly awesome." "Um, the thing is that" "I know I'm supposed to take responsibility for my action," "I know that I'm supposed to feel guilty about it, but I never did." "And I never knew why." "But now I think I can understand that it was just part of what was supposed to happen in my life's journey, you know?" "That was your decision- you did that." "No, I'm not sayin' I didn't." "I'm saying that we're all God's co-workers, and we don't even know it." "Your crime has nothin' to do with God." "Why not?" "God is everything." "You know, look at earthquakes and floods, and-and tornadoes, and all the bad shit that happens- why don't you think that we're a part of all of that too?" "What we do, you know, the shit that we carry with us from one life to the next, maybe there's a plan that includes all of us- you and me and my grandparents, and we just don't know it." "How can we know?" "Enough of this shit." "You know- you know- you and Lucetta," " she said that you were" " Lucetta?" "~ Your wife" " What, you call her Lucetta?" " She said" " Don't." " What?" " Don't listen to her." "What do you mean?" "Don't listen to what she's tellin' you, man." "Well, she believes in you." "Look, it's a game to her, man." "It's a game." "She" "I told you in the beginning, she's an alien." "She's a- she's like a freak." "That's not a nice thing to say." "No, listen, I'm tellin' it to you straight, okay, she's just workin' on you." "She's workin' on you." "She's fuckin' you over, man." "She's an animal." "You know, you're fuckin' nuts, you know that?" "You're fuckin' nuts." "You got a beautiful wife who cares about you, and" "Beautiful?" "You think she's beautiful?" "Okay, you're a con." "I've known that from the fuckin' start." "I don't believe you for one fuckin' second." "Never did, never did." "So you've both been conning me?" "Okay, I know." "I've been around the block a few times." "I ought to know better." "~ I'm Sick and fuckin' tired of it." " What'd I say, man?" "You expect me to eat this new shit you've been handing out?" "Write a nice little note about your goddamn fucking epiphany?" "You're the same bastard you've always been." "I know I am." "That's what I've been sayin', man." " You don't get it." " Get it?" "Oh no no, I got it." "I got it and I'm goddamn fuckin' fed up with you." "The both of you can go to hell for all I care." "I can't f- what have I done?" "Jesus Christ, I've been" "I mean, just goddamn year in and year out sitting across the desk from this and we pretend we're doing something, you pretend you've heard us and then we fall for it." "And then you come back in one year and you're sitting right back here across the same desk from us again and somebody out there is hurt or dead." "Well, I'm not buyin' it anymore." "Nothin' changed for the better. it's all bullshit." "No one changes for the better." "I've spent my whole fuckin' adult life doin' this goddamn bullshit." "I'm sick to death of this whole fuckin' waste." "You get no more of my time, pal." "Get the hell out of here." "Come on." "Let's go, Come on, get out." "Okay." "Oh God." "Oh God." "Hey, man, you have anyone?" "~ What?" " Anybody to stand behind you." " Are you all alone?" " I'm not" "Blow your motherfuckin' life up, man." "Blow it up all the way." "Do it." "Really, take it all the way." "It helps." "Hey, Peterson, we're done." "Just go ahead and burn your motherfuckin' life." "~ Now, God damn it!" " Blow it up." "Let it go, all of it." "Did anybody not fucking hear me?" " Let's go, please!" " Go all the way." " He's coming!" " Just embrace it, man." "Burn it up." "~ Get him the hell out of here." " it's awesome." "I'm pullin' for you." "~ No, really, I'm pullin' for you." " Fuck you, you sick son of a bitch." "This is Jack and Madylyn Mabry." "Please leave a message," "Hey, Jack" " Mr. Mabry," "I left messages at work, but you didn't call me back." "I'm kind of in the dark here." "Don't leave me dangling." "I hate that." "Let the machine get it." "Hello?" "Is Mom there?" "It's Candace." "Hey, it's Mom." "Mm-hmm." "Yeah, I understand." "What's up?" "Well, how's Katie?" "Did you know you started out as a stone?" "Hmm?" "Your soul- it started out as a mineral or a pebble, and then it was reincarnated as a plant, then as a fish, birds, animals and so on." "You had to work your way up to being a human." "Know what it's been doing, your soul?" " Hmm, what?" " It's been paying off debts- past sins from past lives, reducing its burden from one life to the next." "Where'd you get that?" "Junk mail." "You know what I think?" "I think we get this one life, I do, and..." "You account for what you've done in it." "And if you don't, you pay for it when you die." "You don't think?" "Shit." "Shit shit, son of a bitch." "Fuck fuck." " Okay, I get it." " Motherfucker." "Why don't you make me another fucking drink, you cocksucker?" "Who is that?" "Hello." "I'll take care of this." "Will you just pick up the phone sometimes?" " Oh, Mrs. Creeson, please, really." " Pick up the phone when you're here?" " This is inappropriate." " Hi, Mrs. Mabry." "~ Did you get my messages, Mrs. Mabry?" " Look, I'm sorry, please." "Young lady, I'm going to take you to your car." "Let's go." " Look, I'm a little bit worried." " I don't care if you've been worried." "You've been worried?" "I understand if you're worried, Mrs. Creeson, but try and have a little patience." "Get in the fucking car and get out of here." "What's wrong with you?" "Why are you being like this?" "And what's wrong with my husband, huh?" "Please" " You're not supposed to be here." " What did you tell him about us?" "There is no us." "Get the fuck out of here." "~ I just needed a friend to talk to." " Thank you, Mrs. Creeson." "You've got no fucking idea, man." "We'll talk at the prison." "Fucking idiot." "Inexcusable, coming to our home like that." "You know, we can't alter reports once they've been submitted for review." "I know, I know, but I made a mistake." "Ehh, you're only human." "Mitch, I-I-I'm asking, please." "Please." "The hearing's in an hour." "You're kidding, right?" "I know." "I need a little something more to go on here." "I can't go into it." "I just missed something." "I made a~" " I made a mistake." "If you want to plead your concerns, it's fine, or if you want to submit additional evidence, that's okay too." "But you know as well as I do his fate's already been determined." "It's luck and quotas." "Nothing I say will make a difference?" "Well, don't sweat it, Jack." "I mean, you're less than a month to go." "Sleep easy." " Hmm?" " All right." " I'm going out." " What about the Creeson hearing?" "Thanks, Paul." "Revelation 3:20." ""Behold I stand at the door and knock." "If any man open the door," "I will come into him and sup with him and he with me. "" "Revelation 3:20." "All right, the next one is..." "It says Christ died for the ungodly." "Yeah, that's in Romans, chapter 5." "Romans 5:8..." "So we're getting to the commandments next," "I guess, huh?" "Do you believe in all this?" "What?" "Do you?" "You read the meditation." ""What request is on the top of my prayer list for today?" "Is it a selfish request or one that will bring God glory?"" "I know what I want." "How about you?" "You lost your place again." "You have something you want to say to me?" "You don't?" "I can't even think of what you'd want me to say." "You want to talk about it, man?" "What's that?" " Her comin'..." " Hmm?" "...or me going or anything you want." "Look, I'm a little concerned about you, man." "You're seeming a little ragged to me." "Yeah well, put your mind at ease." "So that's it for us, huh?" "You want to ask me any more questions or go over some shit?" "I'll sit in the chair, we can do that thing, you know." "You'd better be smart or you're gonna be right back in here again." "Hey, I got my release, Jack." "You ain't got to concern yourself about me no more, man." "You got it, all right, but make no mistake:" "I can have 'em watch your goddamn ass 24 hours a day." "You got me?" "I got you." "Shit, man, you don't believe in nothing, do you?" "I believe you're one fucked up son of a bitch." "I know you don't believe in me, but you don't believe in yourself." "You don't believe in God." "I don't think you feel that anything is true inside of you." "I'll give you true" "I'm glad you're out of my hair, Gerald Creeson." "Now you can be somebody else's headache." "Oh..." "Man, life is just taking you by the neck, and rattling your whole frame and you don't know which way is up." "It's scary as shit when the wheels come off like that, man." "I feel you." "I've been there." "I mean it." "But that's when you got to start listening, man." "Where the fuck is she?" "You don't want to shoot the shit with me anymore, man?" "I'm gonna miss shootin' the shit with you." "Not me, boy, not me." "Time for you to go." "I've enjoyed chopping' it up with you, man." "Anybody here yet?" "Hey, just keep listenin', Jack." "That's all I'm saying, 'cause I think something's coming for you, but when it comes, man, just stay open to it, you know." "~ Don't close it off." " Here we go." "In there." "Well, happy day." "So, well, can I kiss her?" "Ready?" "Yeah." "Well, good luck to you, Stone." "Hey, I want to thank you." "Seriously, I appreciate everything that you've done for me." "Yep." "Good luck to you too, Mrs. Creeson." "Lucetta, Jack." "I mean, we're all friends here, right?" "Lucetta." "Take good care of him." "I will." "And you take good care too, old man." " See you later, Jack." " Mmm." "Oh, hey, you know, I meant to say," "Lucetta, she did tell me that you fucked her." "I know that must be against some kind of rules around here, right?" "I knew what you two were doing." "Oh, did you know what you were doing when you let my wife suck your cock?" " Good luck to you." " I'll see you out on the bricks." "Good luck to you." "Right now we enjoy the Constitutional freedom to keep and bear arms." "If that were ever infringed, if that were ever repealed or just flat out violated and..." "Madylyn?" "As a Christian, would we be within our rights, because Thomas Jefferson says these rights are inalienable because they come from our creator..." "Madylyn?" "...within our rights as Christians to revolt against the government and its denial of those fundamental Constitutional rights, or would a Christian have to respond differently?" " Some mail." " We would have to respond." "And we as Christians would have to rise up against any government that said we didn't have a right to protect ourselves, because" "I guess I would ask the question, why do they want to take our guns away from us?" "I like you." "I like you, Jack." "I would never fuck you if I didn't want to." "Madylyn!" "Wake up!" "Wake up!" "Madylyn!" "Madylyn, wake up!" "Wake up!" "Come on!" " I got to get to a phone." " Where are you gonna go?" "~ What about Steve and Helen?" " No, they're away." " Well, what about David?" " it's too far. it's too late." "Ah!" "Look at this!" "Oh my G" "Oh God." "You motherfucker!" "God damn it." "God damn it!" " Don't say that." " What?" "Taking the Lord's name- stop that." " Jesus, Madylyn, please." " Stop it!" "I won't stand for it!" "What are you talking about, for Christ's sakes?" "This means something to me." "It may not mean anything to you anymore," " but it means something to me!" " Jesus, Madylyn, we just almost got incinerated in our sleep by some fucking nutjob who I let out, and you're fucking bothering me about my fucking language?" " Nobody did this to us!" " Give me a fucking break!" " Nobody did this to us." " What?" "!" "It wasn't anybody." "It was an act of God." "I've got a pretty good fucking idea who did this to us." "This was an act of God." "I'm going to tell the firemen that." "What are you talking about, Madylyn?" "About the frayed wiring in the kitchen wall." "What are you talking about?" "What wire?" "In the kitchen wall." "And the- the basement." "~ What?" " There are all those rag- rags down there, all those old rags." "I'm gonna tell them to go down there." "Why would you say that?" "Because it's as good a story as any." "it's not that sunny out." "Everybody knows you can still get sunburned on a cloudy day." "Ah, look at the barns." "Remember that?" "Not really." "I don't know how you stuck it out as long as you did." "I think you'd have done this sooner." "I almost did once." "So what happened?" "What happened?" "He's free!" "Yeah!" "He's free!" "That's a free man there, huh?" "You do not want to make it a two-way conversation with them, because they have nothing on their minds but- well, they may have nothin' but time to just think about ways to work on you and to get under your skin." "You cannot make yourself a person to them." "Oh, believe me, I've learned that lesson." "Well, I mean, they'll test you for sure." "A good lookin' woman like you..." "Oh, Jack." "Well, I'm" "I'm retired, I'm not dead, you know." "Come on, Jack, we're friends, okay?" "You're the best." "I wanna have a little fun." "Send me off into the sunset." "Huh-uh." "Let's just keep it pro, okay?" "You want to be a pro?" "Fuck pro." "They're gonna fucking chew your ass up in there." " Okay, Jack, that's enough." " No no, it's bullshit." "Jerking my chain like that, you fucking cunt." " Gimme some respect." " Hey, buddy, let's throw some darts." "Yeah yeah, I'm in." " Up yours." " Whoa whoa whoa, buddy, hey." "I'm just fucked up." "I should go." " No, ride with me." " No, I'm-I'm gonna get a cab." "I'm good, I'm good." "I'm gonna get a cab." "I'm good, word of honor." "I'm good. it's a cab." "...get us to the reality that God has already deemed is going to happen, and nothing is going to change that." "And so it's not like there is this cosmic battle between good and evil, and good might not triumph." "The reality is that there is a battle going on where you would see a huge boxer holding a guy's head back, and the little scrawny guy is flailing his arms, waving at the guy, trying to beat him." "That's exactly what God- God has Satan subdued, but in the flailing of his arms- and this is particularly brought out in Revelation, chapter 12" "Satan flailing his arms is able to do an awful lot of chaos and damage and bad things happen." "And it's because he is enraged because he knows his time is short." "Revelation 12 said that." "Hey!" "This is some shit, man." "Wait whoa!" "You ruined my whole life." "Why?" "Fucking why?" "Why?" "Why what?" "Why did you do if?" "Why did you..." "Okay okay okay okay." "Hey, man, you ain't gonna do this." "You think I won't?" "You think I won't?" "You think I won't?" "No." "No, I don't." "Yeah, at first, I thought I was crazy." "Was this really happening to me?" "Was it all in my head, or is there really a God who can breathe life into me and make me feel his presence?" "So this is actually what encouraged me to write the book." "And honestly it completely changed the way that I look at life..." "Assume that there was a Higher Power, that It created the universe, until God set a bush on fire..." "And maybe I did." "...and said, "Oh, by the way, you were right. "" "You know, and..." "I think" " I think I'm ready to get out." "Next up here is Gerald from southwest Detroit." " Welcome, Gerald." " I just want to say," "I got this book and they say that when you experience a spiritual truth, that it comes to you through sound." "If you let this sound go through you, it changes you, you know?" "It puts you back into harmony, you know, makes you like a tuning fork of God." "Okay." "Yeah, they say they say it can start with small things like little vibrations- you know, the sound of a bee, the sound of a buzzing light" and then it grows." "All right, that's interesting." "Well, they say that everything that happens to you is what was supposed to happen to you for you to advance, that you've got to come back lots of times, you know, cycle through many lives until you learn, until you..." "Well, thanks for your input." "Next up here on the WDDL listener line is" "Kathy in Farmington Hills." "You're on All Voices Under God."