"okay?" "[Today's "Gin Tama" is a two-parter!" "Part One's guest stars are Michael and Marilyn.]" "[Part Two's guests are those black shiny things!" "Sit back and enjoy the show.]" "Who's there...?" "My name is Gankeimaru." "drop the sword you are wearing and leave." "I see..." "So you are the ogre who has been hunting swords and causing a public disturbance." "Very well." "then come and take it... by force!" "Die!" "That was too easy." "eh?" "This is far from the strongest sword I've found..." "I heard there is a samurai's blade that can cut a star... but it seems coming to Earth was a big waste of time." "Star Destroyer"?" "["Don't Panic-There's a Return Policy!"]" "Ouch!" "My god!" "Long hours as a manga artist have turned my stomach into a double cheeseburger!" "Jennifer's going to hate me if I look like this!" "Michael?" "Did a fountain pen pierce your biceps and make them explode?" "at my stomach!" "You need to be careful." "Fountain pens are sharp enough to kill people." "stupid woman!" "It's my stomach!" "Don't worry!" "Use this: the "Round-and-Around Fat Burner"!" "and your stomach fat will completely disappear." "Marilyn?" "!" "Act now and but two colors and we'll throw in the red one for free!" "and you'll achieve the body of your dreams!" "Say goodbye to this double cheeseburger!" "Yahoo!" "Yahoo!" "Yahoo" nothing." "Where did you get that?" "I called that number and they gave it to me." "too." "Yahoo!" "Good god!" "this is called a shopping channel." "It's a TV show where people buy things." "Those things weren't free; you bought them." "Seriously?" "return them immediately." "There's still time if you do it right now." "Johnny!" "Who're you calling Johnny?" "!" "give me a hand." "We're returning all of this." "Right." "Stop right there!" "Maxwell!" "dammit!" "Don't you care if I end up with a double cheeseburger?" "!" "Stupid Gin-chan!" "Adults don't know anything!" "either..." "Hey!" "What're you doing?" "!" "What're you doing walking around with a bunch of swords when there's a sword ban?" "That's not good... at least." "that's three million." "What a filthy wooden sword!" "too?" "You're asking me to buy this from you?" "Yes." "I want to buy stuff from the Shopping Channel." "but I can't buy this from you." "though." "Damn you..." "Do you realize we're Bakufu officials...?" "Phew!" "It reeks of curry!" "isn't it?" "I don't want it." "Surrender!" "The sword..." "Where is the sword...?" "I don't eat Earth foods." "I don't like the taste." "Especially curry." "What?" "A wooden sword? young lady." "Why won't anyone buy this good-for-nothing stick from me?" "!" "Useless thing!" "I don't even get a real salary!" "How am I supposed to buy the things I want?" "!" "I got paid in pickled seaweed!" "How sour a wage can somebody get?" "!" "H-Hey!" "The bridge!" "Am I supposed to spend my youth with just pickled seaweed?" "!" "This isn't it...or this..." "A monster!" "What is that wooden sword?" "!" "The bridge is gone!" "Wooden sword?" "Can't even go home if I want to." "I took his precious sword without his permission." "Gin-chan's going to be angry for sure." "Who are you?" "Young lady." "Where did you get that wooden sword?" "The way it cut a bridge in two..." "I've found it at last...the enchanted sword..." "Star Destroyer!" "I'll take your life!" "young lady!" "Huh? "Sword Collecting"?" "That's right." "There seems to be a lot of attacks around town..." "The culprit is apparently an Amanto training to become the strongest warrior in the universe." "He's apparently really strong." "Seems many Bakufu retainers and ronin have already fallen to him." "Wasn't that his work we just saw?" "you say?" "but the stupid things men do don't change." "Is he pursuing a dream or something?" "All of these guys read too much JUMP." "Gin-san." "That wooden sword is much more powerful than an ordinary metal one." "It can cut through anything." "What on earth is that sword?" "well... a hermit who lived there..." "Huh?" "what'd I do with it?" "Who was that guy?" "Sada... young lady." "Hey!" "Look what you've done!" "too!" "Pay up!" "That guy will pay!" "You're not getting away!" "but your sword... is the enchanted sword I have been searching for all these years." "The Star Destroyer!" "sword freak." "You underestimated me." "young lady?" "But we of the Genbu Clan have bodies so tough that even bullets bounce off us." "no one can stand against me." "The strongest sword should be wielded by the strongest warrior." "admit defeat and hand it over." "this must be my punishment for bad karma." "It's because I stole someone's cherished possession." "God is punishing me." "God..." "He didn't pay me a real salary." "And he took away all my cool crap." "Maybe I should hand over this wooden sword and make it easy on myself." "then I would be exactly like him." "it's impossible for Gin-chan to change his character." "But Kagura..." "There's still time for you." "Grow up!" "Kagura!" "Dammit!" "What have you done?" "What?" "!" "Sadaharu." "I'm still a little mad." "after all." "I'm home!" "Ouch!" "My god!" "I can't believe I'm being threatened by samurai!" "Today's my date with Jennifer." "What rotten luck." "Shit!" "Michael." "Hey." "What're you doing here?" "!" "Nobody said anything about this." "I heard you call me "Frankenstein"!" "you bastard!" "I'm going to take this enchanted sword "Star Destroyer and cut off your ripping muscles so hard you'll never recover." "000 year-old Diamond tree that only grows on a distant planet!" "meteors and even your muscles." "we'll even engrave the hilt!" "can become an invincible samurai!" "thats right." "Engrave it with "Lake Toya" as always." "That's "Lake Toya." "Isn't that awesome?" "!" "I think I'll stick with that design again." "what are you doing?" "Kagura-chan." "I made a killing at the Pachinko parlor..." "I splurged on a new one." "What?" "A wooden sword..." "You mean like that one?" "[Enchanted Sword "Star Destroyer"]" "That's right." "Don't tell Shinpachi." "I want to keep it mysterious." "okay?" "What would you like?" "Pickled seaweed?" "doesn't it?" "Huh?" "I haven't seen my sword for a while..." "So you had it?" "Hey!" "Why'd you break it?" "Why?" "!" "I'm beat." "Let me sleep." "["I Told You to Pay Attention to the News!"]" "Help!" "Health!" "Health me!" "You mean "help me"?" "What's wrong?" "A c-c-c-coackroach!" "In my room!" "What's the matter with you?" "The strongest being in the universe is afraid of a cockroach?" "I can't stand them!" "They're creepy!" "Shape!" "Shape up now!" "Help me." Okay?" "living in Edo is all about... living together with cockroaches." "Good morning." "Something wrong?" "A co-cockroach!" "One hell of a cockroach!" "Pulp!" "Pulp fiction!" "You mean "help me." "Huh?" "A cockroach?" "What is it now?" "Living in Edo is like... doing club activities with fellow cockroaches." "Shimura." "Behind you." "Hump me!" "Hump me!" "You mean "help me." "I am Kusano Hitoyoshi." "we interrupt our normal programming for an in-depth look at the giant cockroach infestation throughout Edo. a renowned authority on interplanetary zoology." "are these really cockroaches?" "Prince Hata] but they are probably not from Earth." "They most likely entered Edo aboard an alien ship that came to Earth." "So they are alien cockroaches?" "They are space cockroaches." "alien cockroaches." "they say." "Space cockroaches." "Damn." "I hope we don't have any..." "You looking for a fight?" "Stop the cameras!" "What was that?" "How could that exist?" "!" "Is that really a cockroach?" "I don't know." "You don't know?" "!" "Isn't this your home?" "!" "You created that monster." "Gintoki-kun." "too!" "but I think this has something to do with it." "Ah!" "My pickled seaweed..." "It's been chewed on." "eating pickled seaweed must've caused a terrible reaction in their bodies." "Seriously?" "!" "This is dangerous." "we'll be bagged and pummeled." "don't let it out of this house!" "what'd you do with the bug spray?" "Oh no!" "I left it in the other room." "You're such a..." "Shinpachi!" "That's why you're always Shinpachi!" "What?" "!" "Are you dissing my entire Shinpachi-tude?" "!" "Unforgivable!" "Unforgivable!" "for Christ's sake!" "dammit!" "And who cares if I get killed?" "!" "I'm just a stupid Shinpachi!" "Bring it on!" "We have been receiving calls and e-mails from one Alien-Cockroach victim after another." "There are even frightening reports of people being attacked." "Idi..." "Prince?" "weren't you?" "Prince?" "so I would advise caution." "you must not kill them." "That would bring disaster." "Disaster?" "What mysteries do these carnivorous monster roaches hold?" "They are carnivorous monster cockroaches." "Like I said." "Giant Roaches." "eh?" "I said Giant Cockroaches!" "Do you want to fight again?" "That was close." "I was just about to kill one." "What're those guys doing?" "Die!" "Damn bug!" "What's the big idea of turning into a monster?" "!" "And after all the food we've left out for you!" "Hey..." "Where's Shinpachi?" "I don't see him." "you don't think Shinpachi was eaten by this thing?" "Don't be silly." "It's just a huge cockroach." "It wouldn't." "Shinpachi!" "damn bug!" "What'd he taste like?" "!" "Like corn potato?" "Or salted cod roe?" "!" "Oh?" "It's crying." "What a baby!" "idiot!" "what should we do with this thing?" "do not kill the cockroaches." "it will call its brethren to its aid!" "are you to attempt to kill it!" "that means there is no way to combat the cockroaches." "you clearly just said "idiot." "we've just been connected live." "Hey!" "Don't change the subject!" "are you at the scene?" "Announcer Ketsuno!" "where the monster cockroaches have caused the greatest damage." "Just look at this disaster. are currently attacking all of Edo." "What will become of Edo from here on?" "Is there a reason why the cockroaches are concentrated in Kabukicho?" "Prince..." "Idiot Prince?" "Why'd you say that?" "!" "You could've just continued on your way!" "I'm definitely going to kill you all later!" "No..." "I won't have to dirty my hands." "You'll eventually die." "Listen to me." "The reason they're gathering there is probably because the queen is there too." "They are all siblings born from a single female." "the queen builds her nest on a planet and lays a large cache of eggs." "The hatchlings eat their way through the entire planet." "they have destroyed several planets." "they will continue to multiply." "it will most certainly be the end of this planet." "So the only way to save ourselves is to exterminate the queen?" "Idiot?" "at least add the "Prince" title!" "Is there any way to tell the queen from the others?" "Nope." "Their queen is identical to an ordinary cockroach." "wait." "There is one thing different about it." "What could that be?" "She has the characters for "Goro" written on her back." "What?" "What does "Goro" mean?" "It's just the name I gave her." "running away from her cage on her own after I took such good care of her." "What did you just say?" "What?" "Did I say something I shouldn't have?" "Uh..." "[Please Stand By.]" "They say it has "Goro" written on its back." "Who cares?" "We're done for." "It's the end of Earth." "you nimrods!" "Don't you get any closer!" "What the hell is going on?" "!" "Is this "Revenge of the Roaches"?" "!" "I should've been nicer to cockroaches!" "this is no time to be sleeping." "Three cockroaches." "Four cockroaches." "Five cockroaches." "Kagura-chan?" "!" "Don't fall asleep counting cockroaches!" "slimy room!" "snap out of it!" "Goro" on its back." "Got it? "Goro" on its back!" "the other cockroaches will die off." "Please." "The fate of the Earth is at stake." "The fate of Earth is in your hands!" "What's this?" "Why's it say "Goro"?" "That's really weird." "As if this thing isn't creepy enough already." "But under these conditions... roach's...thread." "This damn well better be worth some good karma." "Shinpachi have returned!" "Shinpachi!" "You're alive!" "You actually thought I could be killed by a cockroach." "I bought an ultra-powerful bug spray." "I guess that karma stuff works." "Gin-san!" "All right." "It pays to do good deeds." "These things are everywhere!" "The city is going crazy!" "There are pickled seaweed cockroaches crawling all over the streets." "they'll chop our heads off." "There is a strange rumor going around." "Something about these being man-eating cockroaches that came from space to take over Earth." "with "Goro" written on its back." "people will believe anything!" "Shinpachi-kun...say that again." "Earth is doomed." "Is that stupid or what?" "!" "Sure is stupid... like being the man who destroyed the world." "What else can I do but laugh..." "You've seen it?" "You saw Goro?" "!" "I had it in my hand and I let it go." "I've doomed Earth." "Wh-Wh-Where?" "!" "We have to find it right away." "It's no use." "It ran off somewhere." "Forget it." "Let's go eat steak." "you can eat all you want today." "anyway." "pull yourself together!" "It's as though I've condemned us all to death." "Kill me now." "Gin-san!" "12)}[Preview]" "Excuse me?" "May I say something?" "I think the culprit is a pauper." "So I think..." "What's going on?" "What's next week's story about?" "The next episode: "Even Teen Idols Act Like You Guys." "[How a live street performance touched the heart of a young man about to self-destruct.]" "[A young girl's singing gave this young man a reason to live.]"