"♪ Legend of the Seeker 2x18 ♪ Walter Original Air Date on April 24, 2010" "Lord Rahl." "Have you brought what I asked for?" "The Scroll of Valdaire." "Did the Seeker read it?" "I took it from him before he could break the seal." "Then he still has no idea what to do with the Stone of Tears when he finds it." "And he never will." "No!" "Do not destroy it." "It is the Keeper's will that you take the scroll to the Mord-Sith temple at Jandralyn, without breaking the seal." "They will deliver it into my hands, and my hands only." "In the World of the Living, you are nothing more than a spirit." "Into what hands am I to deliver it?" "If I were you, Marianna, I would worry more about making sure that the Seeker does not kill you and take the scroll bere you reach Jandralyn." "Because I am quite certain that my intrepid brother Richard is already on your trail." "Her tracks lead that way, but they're at least a half a day old." "We have to pick up our pace." "Fortune has smiled upon us." "A Sister of the Dark has escaped with the scroll, she's hours ahead, and you call that fortunate?" "Can't you smell that?" "Smell what?" "Pine trees?" "Lamb, butter, a touch of fennel." "And there it is, on the wind, the sound of distant laughter." "Leads me to conclude we're fast approaching a roadside tavern, and the balm of all weary travelers." "We don't have time to feed your belly." "None of us have eaten in days." "We'll all move a lot faster once we're fortified, and I'm certain the good tavern keeper will be more than happy to pack up our victuals for the road." "Compliments of the house." "Oh, no, please, let us pay you." "After all you and your friends have done for the Midlands?" "Let me express my gratitude in what little way I can." "Thank you, sir." "May the Spirits watch over you." "To the Seeker!" "To the Seeker!" "Yes, to the Seeker." "May he burn brightly in the fires of the Underworld." "I don't think I heard you right, sir." "No, you heard me." "Damn the Seeker, and all the fools who helped him bring down Darken Rahl." "Darken Rahl was a wicked tyrant." "Oh, I'll grant you that." "He'd conscript your sons, violate your daughters, lock you up for looking at him funny." "But at least when he was around we had order." "Nowadays, if the highwaymen don't get you, the banelings will." "May the Creator forgive me, I miss the good old days." "To the good old days!" "Well, there's at least one other sensible man in this province." "I once came damnably close to bringing back those good old days." "To returning Darken Rahl to his rightful place among the living." "Sounds like quite a story." "Oh, Oh, that it is, my friend." "And I'd be happy to tell it, if, uh, ahem, my damn throat weren't so dry." "Two tankards of your best, barkeep." "You promised me a tale." "That I did." "But I assure you, it is no tale, my friend." "It is the Creator's honest truth." "It all started in a flea-bitten backwater by the name of Sheephaven, back when Darken Rahl was still in power." "One of the locals had found a way to profit from the general hatred for Rahl." "Step right up, ladies and gentleman." "Give the villain who is the cause of all your suffering the tribute he deserves!" "Three tries for a farthing." "Mm-hm." "D'Harans!" "Real ones!" "Aah!" "No!" "Please don't kill me!" "I'm just some poor sod trying to make a living," "I didn't mean any offense." "You're quite famous." "Do you know that?" "Word of your unique talent has reached the ears of the true Lord Rahl." "He'd like to meet you personally." "Think of it, Lord Rahl." "He could appear in your stead at ceremonial obligations that interfere with more pressing affairs of state." "He could serve as a convincing decoy to would-be assassins." "Hm." "Very impressive, Captain Malray." "Thank you, Lord Rahl." "Very impressive indeed." "He is the very image of me." "Were I to have a belly the size of West Granthia, a nose trampled by a horse, and hair the color of mouse droppings." "Perhaps a year spent breaking stones in the quarries of Groth will improve your powers of perception." "As for him, feed him to dogs, before my enemies find use for him." "Lord Rahl-- We are finished here, captain." "Humbly, respectfully, sir," "I brought this man here not as the finished work of art, but as the raw clay from which it would be sculpted." "If you would only let me show you the wonders I can work, you will not be disappointed." "What do you think, Egremont?" "I !" "gree withou of course, My Lord." "This rogue doesn't have the slightest trace of your natural radiance or nobility." "But if he could be improved upon, as Captain Malray claims, he may be of some use." "One day, you may have the need to convince an adversary that you were dead." "He would at least make a convincing enough corpse." "The man is the height of a toadstool." "What do you intend to do, put him on stilts?" "Please!" "I'm tall enough now." "I swear I am." "Thank the Spirits." "Hm." "Two finger-lengths more." "What?" "Just close your eyes, Walter, and imagine yourself by the sea." "No." "And in time, we solved the problem of Walter's stature and colored that hideous hair." "But there was still a great deal of work to be done." "Coming along." "Hm?" "Though I still don't see a way around that nose." "Oh." "It happened the first time I was mistaken for Rahl." "This drunk took a swing at me and knocked it out of joint." "When I'm entertaining," "I just shade it with a little bit of charcoal and the crowd is none the wiser." "Well, that might fool some provincial bumpkins." "But if you're going to be of any use to Lord Rahl, you will need to convince even those who know him personally." "Oh, no, I have seen wonders done with a little plaster of gypsum and honey in the concealment of unsightly features." "Mm." "There's no need for that." "Perfect." ""P-People of D'Hara," ""a-as we march proudly into the dawn of a new era, united by faith in our cause--"" "Stop, before my ears bleed." "If people hear that, they'll know they're being deceived." "And if that happens, Lord Rahl will order all of our heads to grace the pikes at the palace gates!" "General." "Walter doesn't need to say anything at all." "All he needs to do is stand on the balcony, act the part, and give the crowd the renowned Lord Rahl wave." "Go on, Walter, show the General how beautifully you've mastered the wave." "Now if you really want to be the one to interrupt" "Lord Rahl's revelry to inform him that he needs to come here to lead those dreary devotions, go right ahead." "Very well." "Make your appearance." "And may the Spirits be with us all." "And in time, under my tutelage," "Walter eventually mastered the accent as well." "We became great friends, Walter and I." "And the gold we were paid for our service, well, that financed many a debauch." "Yes." "We'd come a long way from the day I found him on the filthy streets of Sheephaven." "Heh." "But alas, those good old days were few in number." "And when the cursed Seeker put an end to our patron, well, the palace fell into ruin, and was soon overrun by an angry mob hungry for loot and revenge." "Take that down." "Look!" "It's the tyrant, Darken Rahl!" "He's not dead after all!" "Darken Rahl is dead." "And the Seeker killed him, I'm just his double." "How do we know the one who died wasn't a double, and you're not the real Darken Rahl?" "Yeah!" "Malray!" "Bless you, old friend!" "Get him!" "And then the mob swept him away." "And you never saw him again?" "Oh, no, no, no." "I saw him again." "I've only told you the beginning of the story." "Still ahead of us lay the treasure, the blood, the betrayals, and most of all the women." "Well don't stop there, man." "Go on!" "Ah, that, my friend, would require another tankard of ale." "After the fall of Darken Rahl, it was hard for a D'Haran officer." "No more wages, no more plunder." "No more pillage." "But I had a plan to restore my fortunes." "But to do that required finding my old friend Walter again." "How did you manage it?" "Well, I knew he had a taste for stout ale, so I searched all the taverns in D'Hara." "It seemed hopeless, until one night," "I walked into the very watering hole where we are sitting at this very moment." "Thought you could slip me a lead farthing, did you?" "No, I thought they were copper, I swear to you." "I'm the one who's been cheated here." "You rotten, lying scoundrel!" "The tyrant lives!" "Walter." "Anyone who wants a taste of him gets a taste of me too." "Go on." "Malray." "Old friend." "It's good to see you again, Walter." "This is the second time you've saved my skin." "I just wish you could help me wriggle out of it." "I wish I looked like someone else." "Walter, it's how you look that's going to be our salvation." "All you have to do is convince a few Mord-Sith that you're the true Darken Rahl." "Mord-Sith?" "Are you out of your mind?" "The good sisters at the temple of Jandralyn are protecting a hoard of treasure stashed there by Darken Rahl." "Now, when their true lord and master orders them to return it, we will have enough gold to last us the rest of our lives." "Do you have any idea what those women can do to men with the" "The torture sticks they carry?" "They would never dream of using those torture sticks against their one true lord and master." "Which I am not." "And we would have to get close to them, and then they would know." "Walter." "Just close your eyes and imagine yourself by the sea." "The last time you told me to do that, my shoulders were nearly pulled from their sockets." "Yeah, but this time I mean it, Walter." "We'll get the treasure, and then we'll sail to Merilandria, and we'll ljve a life of ease by the shimmering ocean, strolling on the golden sands, a different woman every night." "I'd be happy with just one." "If she were the right girl." "Then we'll find you the right girl." "But first, we need the treasure." "What do you say?" "Lord Rahl, it's true... you are still alive." "Arise, Sisters of the Agiel." "How may we serve you, My Lord?" "I've come for my treasure." "At once, My Lord." "But first, Lord Rahl and I would require a meal, and a hot bath." "Lord Rahl is weary from his travels, and wishes to indulge in those particular pleasures which only the skills of his Mord-Sith can provide." "Of course, Captain Malray." "Immediately." "Why are you standing there?" "Are you as deaf as you are stupid?" "No, mistress." "I'll see to the bath at once." "And supper." "Now." "Yes, mistress." "I don't think we should delay our departure much longer," "Captain Malray." "After all, the future of D'Hara is at stake." "Your devotion to duty is admirable as always, Lord Rahl." "But I beg you for once to think of yourself." "After the hardships of the past months, you deserve one night of pleasure." "How dare a lowly slave look directly into the eyes of Lord Rahl." "Don't!" "My Lord?" "You will treat the slave gently, or you will feel the sting of my wrath." "Yes, My Lord." "Are you trying to get us killed?" "The real Lord Rahl would never show kindness to a slave." "They were being so cruel." "And how cruel are they going to be to us if we're discovered, you idiot?" "I am the one who said we should get out of here." "If we try and leave now, before Lord Rahl indulges in his famous appetites, they'll get suspicious." "Lord Rahl, your bedchamber is in readiness." "May I show you there personally?" "Um..." "I have affairs of state to attend to." "But I command you to show Captain Malray here to his bedchamber." "And do not fail to extend to him every courtesy you would extend to me." "As you command, My Lord." "I will fetch you a robe, captain." "Walter." "Hm?" "You are the best friend a man has ever had." "The night that Walter and I spent in that temple was nearly worth all the trouble that came after." "Nearly." "I assure you, My Lord, the treasure has gone untouched since you entrusted it to our care." "Good." "Load it onto the wagon." "At once." "Must you leave us so soon, My Lord?" "I have many enemies in the Midlands." "More than we can fight at present." "So I will sail to the Lands of the South where I will use the treasure to raise a mercenary army with which to return to re-conquer D'Hara." "A wise plan, My Lord." "You and your sisters will provide us with an escort to see us safely to the port." "Our real plan was to catch a boat to Merilandria, but I knew we needed protection to get us past the marauders and the bandits of the Iron Mountains." "And we almost made it..." "Halt!" "...if it hadn't been for the meddling of those Mord-Sith wenches." "Lord Rahl, it is your most trusted officer," "General Egremont." "It was the one man in the entire world we knew we couldn't possibly deceive." "What is he doing here?" "We sent word to him, My Lord." "You will need all the swords you can get if you are to restore the glory of D'Hara." "Are you a fool?" "Do you not know that Lord Egremont is a traitor?" "He tried to usurp the throne." "Yes." "I had no idea." "Please, Lord Rahl, forgive me." "Your only hope of forgiveness from Lord Rahl is the death of Egremont and all his nefarious followers." "Order yours sisters to attack, before he slaughters us all." "You heard Lord Rahl!" "Destroy them!" "When the life went out of that first Mord-Sith..." "I knew our troubles had only begun." "What do you mean?" "Well, she was dead, man." "Her soul was travelling down to the Underworld." "Imagine her surprise when she finds herself in that fiery pit of anguish, facing the real Lord Rahl." "And imagine his displeasure when he's told by his faithful Mord-Sith that some impostor is making off with his gold." "I fought bravely at Walter's side, but we were overcome." "Why did you attack us?" "Lord Rahl commanded me." "Lord Rahl is dead!" "So I can only conclude that man's an imposter, a double once in Lord Rahl's employ." "You will beg my forgiveness for your impertinence, Egremont." "Or you and all your men will pay for it with your sorry lives." "Gladly." "If you can prove that you are indeed the true Lord Rahl." "Which you can do by telling me what was the chief entertainment at the fateful birthday party of Princess Violet of Tamarang?" "A clown." "No, Walter." "It was a puppeteer." "You have been deceived." "Um..." "No." "No, no." "You know" " Oh!" "Aah!" "No." "Do not kill him." "My Lord, he was impersonating you, and stealing your gold." "Yes, so I've just been informed by a recently dead Sister of the Agiel." "But this charlatan was useful to me in life, and may one day be useful to me in death." "Throw him in your dungeon, but maintain his appearance in case I have need of his services in the future." "Stay at the temple with your men." "Guard him with your life, until I appear to you again." "No, please" " Aah!" "That was nearly half a year ago." "I haven't seen poor Walter since." "No doubt rotting in that Mord-Sith dungeon as we speak." "Here's to you, Walter." "I don't understand it." "We should have caught up to her by now." "Maybe we have." "Zedd." "Command me, Confessor." "Remove the dacra." "Oh." "Oh, thank you, Kahlan." "The Scroll of Valdaire." "Do you know where it is?" "Answer him." "Forgive me, Confessor." "I don't know anything about a scroll." "A Sister of the Dark took something very valuable from the Seeker and ran off." "Where is she?" "That must be Sister Marianna." "She ordered us to stay here and attack you and the Seeker, and at least slow you down if we couldn't kill you." "Please, forgive me, mistress." "Which way did she go?" "West." "Let's move." "General." "This woman claims Lord Rahl ordered her to meet him here." "Sister Marianna, faithful servant of the Keeper." "The day we have been waiting for has finally come." "But Lord Rahl is not here." "I have the power to summon him." "Do you still have the scroll?" "I wouldn't have dared to appear before you without it." "My Lord, I have done asou've commanded and personally supervised the incarceration of the prisoner." "I'm so pleased to hear that." "Because now it is time for our old friend Walter to die." "It's so cold down here." "Please don't tell anyone, but I managed to steal a few tots of rum." "It should warm you up a bit." "Put these on." "Hurry!" "What's going on?" "I'll explain once we're outside." "Quick." "There's nobody coming." "There will be." "Why are you helping me?" "You were kind to me." "Nobody's ever been kind to me before." "We have to keep going." "He's gone!" "My sisters will get him back." "My riders will catch him faster." "Go!" "Rahl?" "No, no, I'm not him!" "I swear I'm not." "I'm just this sod who looks like him." "It's true." "I saw a Sister of the Dark summon the spirit of the real Lord Rahl." "I can't be him." "See?" "I'm not a spirit." "Go ahead." "Touch me." "Uh, but not with that." "Nobody needs to touch you." "It's obvious you're not Rahl." "This Sister of the Dark." "Did she have a scroll with her?" "Yes." "Please, help us." "They're planning to kill Walter." "Thank you for saving us." "We'll just be on our way now." "We don't want to be any more trouble." "Okay." "You're not going anywhere." "Oh." "The Sister of the Dark is in that temple with the scroll." "We need to go in and get it." "We don't need extra cargo." "Think about it." "Darken Rahl keeps a look-alike alive in his castle, where he has summoned a Sister of the Dark to assist the Mord-Sith." "He has all the magical ingredients he needs to return to the Land of the Living in this man's body." "What?" "We can't let him run off and risk Rahl recapturing him somehow." "We'll storm the temple, get the scroll, and then we'll decide what to do with them." "You'd better burn these bodies before Rahl sends them back as banelings." "What an unexpected pleasure to see so many old friends in one place." "Though I must say, Walter, I have seen you looking better." "We know what you're planning to do to him." "And we're not going to let it happen." "No, something tells me you'll do more than let it happen." "You are going to kill him for me too." "And then your new Sister of the Dark friend here will summon my soul into his body, and Cara's lovely lips will blow the Breath of Life into my new lungs." "You're out of your mind." "On the contrary." "I'm thinking quite clearly." "Are you, brother?" "Or do I need to remind you that without the Scroll of Valdaire, you will never repair the veil?" "The Keeper will win, and every living person in this world will die." "But if you do as I ask," "I will hand you the scroll personally." "Suddenly you want to defeat the Keeper?" "I want to live again." "You of all people must understand that, brother." "I miss the taste of a crisp apple." "The warm press of a woman's flesh against my own." "But I must admit, being a spirit does have its advantages." "For instance, I can appear to Sister Marianna much faster than you can get to the temple." "I have but to command her to burn the scroll and your failure is assured." "So do we have an agreement, or don't we?" "If we turn down Rahl's proposal, the scroll will be ashes before we get to the temple." "I never thought I'd say this, but that devious bastard has us firmly by our nethers." "We can't just kill Walter." "Maybe we don't have to." "How attached are you to the body you were born with?" "I'd do anything to have a different face." "I think that can be arranged." "How?" "We have the magical means to put your spirit into one of these bodies, and bring you back to life." "And put Rahl's spirit into Walter's body." "Exactly." "Take your pick, any one you fancy." "But quickly." "Uh..." "You choose." "Me?" "Yeah." "If I'm going to have a new body," "I want one that pleases you." "Come." "Zedd, once we give Rahl his new body, we can't just trust him to bring us the scroll back." "You could confess him." "Rahl's soul is immune to confession." "But there is another way." "You sure this is gonna work?" "Don't worry, I went through it myself, and it worked fine." "Okay." "Oh." "Is--?" "Is this going to hurt?" "I'll try to make it quick." "Okay." "Um!" "Does it really have to be a knife?" "Just sit back, okay, and try and relax." "Take a deep breath." "That wasn't so bad, now, was it?" "Don't be afraid, Walter." "I'm right here." "Now." "Mika, it's me." "I'm back!" "Ah, it's good to be back." "I knew you'd do the right thing, brother." "Sister Tyra is going with you to the temple." "You're going to get the scroll and bring it straight back." "Otherwise, she'll release the magic of the dacra, and you'll be dead again in a heartbeat." "This really wasn't necessary." "I would have done exactly as I promised." "Well, I won't have to take that on good faith now, will I?" "My Lord." "How is it possible you've returned without the help of Sister Marianna?" "And how did you get the prisoner's body when my men have yet to return with him?" "I don't know what rabbit trail your men are following, Egremont." "Fortunately, their ineptitude was redeemed by Sister Tyra here." "You flatter me, My Lord." "Not only did she recapture and kill Walter, she performed the ritual of resurrection." "What Mord-Sith did you find to administer the Breath of Life?" "I was revived by Tyra, who had the foresight to kill a Mord-Sith and take her han." "It appears you and your sisters are not as indispensable as you think." "Now give me the scroll." "My Lord, you do seem very much yourself, but in light of recent misunderstandings," "I believe you would want me to verify the identity of anyone who claimed to be you." "Of course." "I'm sure you could tell me, for example, what was the gift you gave your sister Jennsen last year when you were trying to earn her trust?" "A kitten." "And unless you want to share that poor creature's unfortunate fate, you will hand me the scroll right now." "Hm." "How very interesting." "You may be on your way now, Sister." "Sisters!" "You will of course want refreshment, My Lord." "And company." "Yes, I would." "But unfortunately, I have time for neither." "I must be on my way." "Prepare a wagon for my treasure." "At once, My Lord." "The Mother Confessor said nothing about treasure." "Now that I'm alive again, I have no intention of being penniless." "I won't allow you to displease my mistress." "Well, imagine her displeasure if the Seeker never has a chance to read this scroll." "Oh, you may command the magic of the dacra to kill me, but by then this parchment will be nothing but cinders." "My Lord." "Your wagon is being prepared." "Shall I assume we're returning to the People's Palace to reclaim your throne?" "You are to remain here, Egremont." "My Lord, I am most eager to help you resecure your domain." "The time is not yet right." "Before I return to the palace," "I must pay a visit to Ravensberg." "When I'm ready, I will send for you." "Is that clear?" "Yes, My Lord." "I need your best archers, at once." "Why?" "Lord Rahl was sending me a message." "He was once ambushed at Ravensberg and almost killed." "He's telling me he's in danger again now." "And we're going to get him out of it." "suspenseful theme playing )" "Do you have the scroll?" "I think you'll find it interesting reading." "I know I did." "Hand it over." "Of course, brother." "But in case your plan is to have your pet Sister of the Dark here kill me once I relinquish it, you should know that I would then be forced to tell the Keeper what is written on the scroll." "And then he will know exactly where you'll be going next." "I imagine he would send an army of banelings to greet you." "You win." "She won't release the magic." "Now give me the scroll." "Now get this thing out of me." "I'm thinking maybe we should leave it in." "You're much more cooperative this way." "Lord Rahl is under the Seeker's control." "And will be as long as the Sister of the Dark lives." "Kill her." "Let's go." "I know a place we can be safe." "And happy." "Hyah!" "For D'Hara and Lord Rahl!" "Hyah!" "Walter's getting away with the treasure." "We have no use for it." "Let them go." "They're not the only ones that got away." "Rahl's gone too." "We can track him." "Maybe." "We didn't come for Rahl." "We came to find out what we're supposed to do with the Stone of Tears." "What does it say?" ""The instructions inscribed upon this scroll" ""will only appear in the glow cast by a Night Wisp."" "All this trouble and the instructions are invisible?" "Only until we find one of Kahlan's tiny friends." "Well, I guess we know which where we're headed." "So does Rahl." "A tankard of stout ale, barkeep." "Aha, a brother in arms!" "Brings to mind the good old days." "You know, I once came damnably close to bringing back those good old days." "It's quite a story, and I'd be happy to tell it if my, um, ahem-- If throat weren't so damn dry." "I already know that story." "In fact, I know a part of it you don't." "The happy ending." "Oh, what's the matter, Malray?" "Don't you recognize your old friend?" "Walter?" "How?" "That's quite a story too." "Which I'll tell you on the road." "That is of course if you're still interested in going to Merilandria." "Oh, I-I'm a little short of funds, I'm afraid." "I've recently come into a small fortune myself." "Found a girl too." "The right one." "She's outside in a coach right now." "And I've bought passage for three on the next ship out of Wynnmore." "Is" " Is this really possible?" "Walter!" "Just close your eyes, Malray..." "And imagine yourself by the sea." "Cheers."