"Ghost of the kicks not listening to talks." "So where's the husbands ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "Your husbands." "The Nicks." "Oh, the Nicks." "He's sleeping." "Wife working, husband jerking." "Sleeping." "Same to same." "Okay, I'm running late for work." "Have a good day." "I never play." "Husbands..?" "Amby !" "Hey, Amby.." " Yes my dear Jignesh ?" "What are you doing ?" "Let's watch a movie." "Sory, I've got to meet Nick." " Hello !" "Ever since this Nikhil Arora has entered your life.." "But seriously, take some time out for your friends." "Oh, oh my god I'm late." "Must be Nick." "Hey Nick." "Who's this ?" "This, my dear man, is Jignesh." "Where's Amby ?" " She's right here." "And if you don't mind may she watch a movie with me, please ?" "It's her life." "Why should I mind ?" "Hey Nick." "Don't listen to him, I'm coming." "No listen, that's why I called." "I won't be able to make it." "I've got to make the provisions list for this month with Dheka." "You cary on with Jignesh." " No, no. I've got to shop for the house." "I'll see you at home." " l'll be late." "I'll be waiting." "Oh !" "Jesus Christ !" "I thought you'd be asleep by now." " Not before you come home." "I'll be late evey night." " l'll get used to it." "Hey, the house looks amazing." " Thanks." "You did all this in one day ?" "Aren't the curains too silk-satiny ?" "And what are these candles for ?" "We never have power cuts here" "You aren't even slightly romantic" "That's worse !" "Shut up. I love these candles." "Smell them." "What ?" " Smell them." "They're scented candles." "Sory." "You don't like anything, do you ?" "No !" "I love it." "Difference number three." "Hello ?" "Hey Ron !" "Hi Cathy." "What ?" "That's great news !" "Are you mad ?" "Wow !" "When did you find out ?" "What was the bloody hury ?" "What do you mean it just happened ?" "Haven't you heard of protection ?" "Oh Cathy, I'm so happy for you." "You don't know what you're getting into, staying up nights, changing diapers." "And, and.." "I know !" "Seeing them walk for the first time, hearing them speak." "Ron !" "Your life's over." "Oh Cathy, this is such a bright new chapter." "I'm going to come and see you in the evening." "Okay ?" "Bye !" "I have no words, Ron." "No, I have no words." "Nick !" "Oh shit !" "No, no it's fine." "is it bleeding ?" "Yes." "Oh, damn it." "Let me take a look." "No, no, it's all right." " lt's not all right Nick." "It's a really bad cut." "You need to see a doctor." "No !" "No doctors !" "Trust me." "It's fine." " Nick, you may need stitches." "It's really bad." " Stitches ?" "No, no, no stitches." "Listen, I know my system." "It's all right." "Stop all that !" " Nick, stop being difficult." "You need a doctor." "No, No doctor please !" "Okay ?" "I don't like hospitals and doctors." "I am a doctor !" "Stop moving." "It'll burn !" " lt won't lt will burn." " You won't even know when it happens." "Right." "Okay shut your eyes and think of something nice." "Like ?" " Like anything.." "something you like." "Imagine me, in a towel.." "just coming out of the shower." "Yes." "My hair is wet." "Yes." "The water is dripping on the carpet." "Not on my carpet." "You come close to me.." "vey close." "And.." "And ?" "And.." "And ?" "And.." "And ?" "And.. it's done lt's done - lt's done ?" "Hey, finish the stoy." "Come on." "You come closer to me." "And ?" "Closer." "Always, her feet are in the clouds." "Always, her eyes stare me down." "Always, her anger is frost." "Always, the fire in her eyes." "Always, in the midst of a fight.." "a mistaken smile and always.." "my hear goes hmmm." "Always when I talk, he's sleepy." "Always when he wakes, he's weepy." "Always he's stealing up behind me, always waking me out of reverie.." "taking me in his arms and falling all over himself and always.." "my hear goes hmmm." "Yes, she's only telling me no." "Yes, she's only giving me attitude." "Yes, she's only a little pigheaded." "Yes, she's only got no brains.." "always on the wrong side of the road always brushing my wrong side.." "always never giving me time, never being reasonable." "She's always there before time..." "and takes no excuses... but never failing to wait for me and always.." "my hear goes hmmm." "Cy-baby at the movies." "Mouth agape in dreams." "So stupid at times.." "he deserves a thrashing.." "for never meaning whatever he says." "Furniture's in the clod's way, he's battling drapes evey day." "when it's his turn for vacuuming, a disaster is brewing." "He ends winded and falling asleep, but he's why.." "my hear goes hmmm." "Somewhat different." "sometimes wrong." "Somewhat strange." "sometimes errant." "She's like what I never imagined." "He's just like whatever I dreamt." "is that why I feel like he's mine ?" "is she a dream ?" "Oh how I wish he won't vanish, because.." "my hear goes hmmm." "Hey.. hey what's wrong ?" "Amby.. what's this ?" "Amby, please, talk to me." "What happened ?" "I'm pregnant." "What ?" "I'm pregnant." "What ?" "Are you sure ?" "Completely sure ?" "Yes. I took the test twice." "It was positive both times." "Oh crap !" "How could you do this ?" "How could I do this ?" "I mean, how did this happen ?" "We always use protection." "I know.." " Then ?" "Then what, Nick ?" "You know that protection's not always hundred percent." "Then why are you asking me ?" "Sory ." "Get rid of it." "What ?" "Get rid of it." "You don't want this kid !" "I don't want it." "Let's kill it." "The word is aborion, Nick." "We need an aborion." "Don't say kill it." "What difference does it make what we call it ?" "We've got to do what has to be done !" "Let's go now. I'll come with you." "I'll stay here." "You won't come with me ?" "Amby, you know me." "Hospitals and doctors and.." "Fine." "Come." "Hello Mrs Winters." "We feeling good today ?" "Excellent." "This is Ambar Malhotra, a student of mine." "Ambar, sit." "It's fascinating to watch, you know." "Excuse me." "After five months your baby responds to voices." "Look... he's responding to us!" "There, you see the hands taking shape." "You don't see the legs because the body's in the way." "But I'm sure you can feel the legs" " Oh yes, she can kick." "It could be a he.-lt's a she." "I know it. I can just feel it." "And just there, you can see the baby's hear beating." "She's so beautiful." "Oh god, I think I'm going to cy." "Judy, everything all right ?" " Everything's perfect." "Mrs Winters, I'll send your repors." " Okay great !" "Thank you." "Welcome." "Are we going now ?" " Yes." "Bye-bye." "It's been twenty years and yet evey time I see a new life, I still feel the same." "Life giving birh to life." "It really is amazing." "But when it's conceived, it isn't a new life, it's just a par of your body." "Well, that's depends on your viewpoint." "I believe that it's a new life from the moment of conception." "But, maybe I'm old-fashioned." "So tell me, how come you're here ?" "I'm pregnant." "Wow." "Congratulations." "I didn't know you were married." "I need an aborion." "Don't wory Ambar." "With laser technology you won't even feel the pain." "It'll all be done in fifteen minutes." "You just relax, Okay ?" "Nick ?" "Where are we going ?" " Home." "Why ?" "Do you have some work ?" "I think you should rest today." " No." "I mean us." "The two of us." "Where are we going ?" "I.." "I don't understand." "Three months ago I met a guy." "Before I met him, I detested him." "Then I met him and I took a liking and we stared living together." "And now, now I love him." " l hope you're talking about me." "I love you too Amby." "You know that." "So now what ?" "What happens now ?" "I don't know." "I haven't thought about it." "I guess, with time we'll both realise what we want." "How much time ?" " What do you mean ?" "Nick, we stared living together for a reason.." "to get to know, to understand each other." "This wasn't a relationship, it was the beginning of one, right ?" "Right." "So we made a beginning, and I think it's a vey good beginning." "I like being with you." "You like being with me." "So shouldn't we think about this relationship now ?" "Don't tell me you're talking about marriage ?" "Are you ?" "I don't know." "Amby, you're the one who said that you're not ready for marriage.." "that you can't even think about it now." " Yes. I couldn't think of marriage then." "I didn't know what I wanted from life." "But now I know." "What do you know ?" "That I want to be with you for the rest of my life." "Ambar, I like living with you too." "And we are living together." "Then why..?" "Because I love you." "And maybe I want the right to have a say in your life.." "and I want to give you that right too." "Do you still think we don't know each other ?" "Why are we afraid of giving this relationship a name, Nick ?" "Amby, listen to me." "This will complicate everything." "Please don't ruin this." "You've just been through a major trauma." "I know this was not easy for you." "Just let it be for a few days and.." "I didn't get the aborion done." "What ?" "And then I saw the hands and the beating of the hear." "It was a life Nick.." "living inside that woman, a life now inside me." "I can't destroy it." "What the.." "listen to yourself." "What are you saying ?" "You have a life !" "Your studies, your work, us damn it !" "You want to give it all up just for the sake of a child ?" "No Nick. I didn't want this." "I'm scared too." "But I can't kill it." "The word is aborion !" "Amby, listen to me." "You're ruining both our lives." "Please, don't do this." "I need time to think this over." "This is not just your decision you know. lt's my life as well." "And I don't want this kid." "I know." "And this doesn't make any difference to you ?" "Nick, do you love me ?" "What difference does it make, Ambar ?" "What difference does it make how much I love you and how much you love me !" "I can't give you the proof that you're asking for." "I don't want to get married." "I don't want this kid." "No matter how many times you ask me, nothing's going to change." "You're right." "We still haven't understood each other." "Yes !" "We're far from understanding !" "Because I thought.." "I was with a sensible, intelligent girl who'll live life to the fullest with me." "I'm sory you were inconvenienced." "Oh go to hell." "You know what, I'm glad we decided to live together first." "Because right now all I can think of is..." "Thank God, we didn't get married." "Now you listen to me." "You have absolutely no responsibility towards me and this baby." "You want to be free, you're free." "I'll decide what I have to do now." "One more thing." "You once asked me a question.." "about whether I'd ask myself ten years on why I didn't give Nick and Ambar a chance." "And the answer is yes, I would ask myself that. I'm glad I gave us this chance." "Now I will never regret having lost something." "I'm glad I discovered that there was nothing to lose anyway." "Give him some time." "I'm sure he'll feel differently." "Feel differently ?" "The hell he'll feel differently." "Don't you Cathy me !" "Ron, all you guys are all the same." "But what did I do ?" "The same, all of you !" "Wimps, cowards." "Everything's fine while it's fun and games." "Eveyone's laughing, eveyone's having fun, taking it easy." "Then, the minute that it comes the time to take just a little bit of responsibility." "what do you do ?" "You run." " But did I run ?" "Tell me, did I run ?" " Oh you want to run, don't you ?" "You want to run right out that door, because we don't need you." "You know that, don't you ?" "Frankly, I think we're better off without you." "But.. what did I do ?" "Oh, your friend !" "Your best friend !" "Look what he's done to my best friend." "I'll talk to him." "No, you won't say anything to him." "Then what will you do, Ambar ?" "Will you bloody well speak English ?" "Darling, I was just asking her what she's going to do." "where she's going to stay.." " What do you mean where she'll stay." "She'll stay with us of course!" "How dare you even ask that question ?" "She's got nowhere else to go." "You know what's going on here, do you ?" "You'll stay with us, right ?" " l've no problem, she can stay here." "Ambar, you can stay here as long as you like." "No." "No ?" "Then what are you going to do ?" "I've paid half the rent for this house." "So, for the next eight months, this is as much my house as it's yours." "So I'm not going anywhere." "From now on, I'll live in my room." "If you have a problem, you're free to go." "Let's just ty not to get into each other's faces." "Please don't keep reminding me that you live here too." "Okay ?" "Okay." "So now what ?" " Nothing." "We like each other but we want different things from life." "So will you leave her ?" "Do I have a choice ?" " Of course you have a choice." "You can be with her for ever" " But where the hell was I going, yaar ?" "I was with her, it's not like I was running away." "And if we'd stayed happy, I would have stayed with her." "So where the hell did this forever nonsense crop up from ?" "So you'll never mary ?" " Maybe." "And you don't want kids either?" " Definitely not." "Why ?" " Why what ?" "Marriage or kids ?" "Marriage." " Ron, why do we stay with someone ?" "Because we want to be happy, right?" "But what if we don't find happiness ?" "Will we let a piece of paper tell us now live in misey, you are trapped." "You and two witnesses have signed off on a document with forever written on it." "And now, you have to live unhappily ever after!" "But why unhappy, Nick ?" " Because people change Ron." "Look at yourself." "You used to be happy, carefree, you'd hit on a girl whenever you saw one." "I liked you." "And now.." "all you can talk about is how you and Cathy fight." "What the fight was about, how irrational she is." "That's all you say." " Untrue, we have good times together." "Yeah ?" "When was the last time you looked good for her ?" "What do you mean ?" " l mean you put on your best clothes.." "took her out, candlelight, wine, romance..?" "When was the last time you took Cathy on a date ?" "But who goes on a date after you're married ?" "Exactly !" "I want evey day to be like a first date." "There was romance between Ambar and me." "We had laughter, joy.." "because we lived together out of choice." "It was perfect !" " Life is not perfect, Nick." "Our life was, Ron !" "We loved to care for each other, she'd wait up for me at nights." "I'd wake up early in the mornings for her." "After marriage, everything changes." "We star taking each other for granted." "The same fights, the same misunderstandings." "Why do you come home so late?" "Why don't you wake up early ?" "Why do you have to go out with friends ?" "But all this can happen even without marriage, right ?" "That's it." "And that's when you know it's over." "And you should always have that freedom, to say that it's over." "Hi baby." "Okay, but isn't there some other way ?" "Of course I understand." "Of course I care about the baby." "Of course I love you !" "No but.. can, can we think of something ?" "Okay, all right." "I love you too." "What happened?" "Cathy's saying that when the baby comes, Goofy can't stay with us." "Why ?" "She's just paranoid." "Allergy from the fur or he might bite the baby.." "Oh crap." "I hate this man. I love Goofy." "See what I mean ?" "Now it's all going to star." "Do's and dont's, sacrifices, adjustments.." "So what ?" "Do it then." "You're the one who's ready to play daddy." "Will you take Goofy in ?" "Are you going to cy ?" "Turn that thing down." "Will you please turn the tv off ?" " l can't sleep unless I watch tv." "Then keep the volume low." "You don't live here alone." "Oh really ?" "I thought we weren't going to remind each other about that ?" "That's right." "And this idiotic volume in the middle of the night.." "keeps reminding me that you live here too, so..!" "What the hell are you doing ?" "I paid for this tv. I'll watch it whenever I want, at whatever volume I want." "So please, from now on, don't touch my tv." "Fine." "Oh crap, what are you doing ?" "I pay the cable bill evey month." "So please, don't attach it to your tv from now on." "Nick." "Damn it Nick, come out !" "This is not your drawing room where you can chill out over a newspaper." "Nick, how can you be so disgusting !" "You're drinking milk in the loo !" "Nikhil Arora, this is your last warning !" "Come out !" "Nikhil.. right that's it !" "There's no way I'm coming out now!" "Do whatever you want." "What is this ?" " l feel better when I smell this soap." "Otherwise I'll throw up again." "This, you psycho !" " A lesson to you." "Are you bloody crazy ?" "You threw up in my cap.." "in my chefs cap...crap !" "How could you ?" "What did you want me to do ?" "You build a bloody house in there." "Do you want me to break the door down ?" "But in my chefs cap ?" "You're sick !" " Yes you idiot !" "It's morning sickness" "An insensitive man like you can never understand this." "Why can't you comprehend such a small thing ?" "There is a pregnant girl living with you in this house." "Please, keep the bathroom free as far as possible." "Why the hell should I suffer if you want a kid ?" "Don't I need the bathroom ?" "You were reading the newspaper in there." " So ?" "Can't you come outside and read it ?" " No !" "I read the newspaper in the loo.." "it's my habit." " And the milk ?" "Do you have to drink that in there as well?" "Yes." "Otherwise, I don't get pressure in the mornings." "So you enjoy your pressure, and you enjoy your paper." "I swear, if I don't throw up in Juliet's bowl tomorrow, you can change my name." "Oh, you just ty it, you just bloody ty it." "You can't even imagine what I'll do to your room after that." "What'll you do, huh ?" "What'll you do ?" " l.." "I don't know !" "I haven't thought about it yet." "But I'll definitely do something !" "Look Nick, please ty and understand." "There's a pregnant girl living with you in this house." "So please, keep the bathroom free." "Okay." "But on one condition." "You have to wash this." "This." "This is exactly why I don't trust Indians." "Babes, why I don't the trust Indians ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "Listen, we don't want to live here." "So please return the remaining rent." "Can't do it buddy boy." "Just can't do it." "You can keep one month's rent as notice." "But return the rest at least." "Why do you want to leave the house ?" " Personal reasons." "Then I can't return your money either." "Why ?" "Personal reasons." "Look, there's eight months left." "Stay, have fun, have a good time." "After that, you can go wherever you want with your wife." "We lied to you." "Really ?" "We're not married." "Now you'll have to throw us out !" " Why ?" "Because you only want married tenants." " Who said that ?" "You did !" "I said that I like married people because they're idiots." "And idiots aren't dangerous." "Then I'm not an idiot." "I'm dangerous !" "Are you threatening me ?" "No." "Good." "Because I don't like threats." "Okay." "Stay if you want." "Leave if you want." "I don't give a crocodile's arse!" "Babes, do I care ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "Good." "Vey good." "You have to move on." "There's nothing left in this relationship." "Amby, you deserve someone much better - l know." "But you still love him." " Yes." "Why ?" "Love isn't like a switch that I can just turn off." "It'll take time." " Why ?" "He's a coward." "He doesn't understand you, doesn't care for you.." "He's troubling you instead of helping." "Why do you still love him ?" "Because those three months were the best of my life." "I'm still unable to accept the fact that it was all a lie, a facade." "The Nick that I was in love with didn't exist." "Move on, Amby." "Don't hur yourself any more." "I'm working on it." "For instance, if you rearrange the letters of mother-in-law, you get woman-hitler." "You're kidding !" " No, no, I'm serious." "Check it out." "Wow, what a co-incidence." "Actually I don't think it's a co-incidence at all." "Hey Cathy" " Hey Amby.... hi." "The house looks beautiful." " Oh so do you..thank you." "Hey, come let me show you around the house." "You're going to love it." "And this is the master bedroom." "Oh I see." "What do you intend to see in this ?" "Myself... and may be Cathy too!" "Oh wow." "What a beautiful study - l know ." "I'm sure you can't wait to use it." " Oh we've used it already don't wory." "This is a vey strong table." "Oi !" "Mindblowing, man." "Check the chairs." "Vibrating chairs. I love it." "Sit, sit." "Vibrating chairs are so much fun!" " While watching movies ?" "Someday we'll do that as well." "And this is where we'll be spending a lot of our time." "You got a Jacuzzi !" "You bet. I told Ron that if he wants a home theatre, I want a Jacuzzi." "I love blackmail - l know !" "And this is our guest bedroom." "You mean my room." " Did you give me a room ?" "This is my room." "This is where Cathy will send me after we fight" "And this is my favourite room." "Okay and this is.." "..Ron, Mr. Smith's here." "Oh shit !" "My boss." "Cathy come on, let's go." "Coming." "I will always be with you my love." "Walking beside you, like the sk above." "In summer's sun, I'll give you shade." "In autumn's loneliness, I'll be your shadow." "When in doubt, count me in." "With you, I've found life at last." "In a web of joys you cast.." "..am I discovering all I ever wished for, or am I lost ?" "..I'll always be with you, my love.." "..walking with you, like the sk above." "Let the sorrow-laden clouds rain on me." "Let the despairing moments come to rest on me." "All of your pain, give to me." "Find someone to love my hear seemed to say.." "..where secrets aren't held, and all is given away.." "..but when I open my eyes, will my dream be gone, or stay ?" "I will always be with you, my love." "Walking beside you, like the sk above." "Shit !" "I know." "It's perfect." "I know." "What a location, yaar !" "Isn't it expensive ?" " Distress sale." "I'm getting it at half price." "Your dream restaurant, in front of you." "Finally !" " Finally." "In the corner, an outdoor barbecue and kitchen." "Everything in front of your eyes." "Waitresses ?" " Of course, all in swimming costumes." "Yes, yes, yes." "Has your loan been processed ?" "Almost." "The formalities will be over by the afternoon." "And then, I will be the proud owner of "Nick's Boat"" "Nick's Boat ?" " That's the name." "It's horrible." "I love it.- l also love it." "Congratulations brother, I'm so happy for you man." "Oh, it's my bank manager." "Hello Mr Lehmann." "Everything good ?" "What ?" "But I don't understand." "You said everything had been approved." "Oh Mr. Lehmann you can't do this to me." "I was counting on you." "But you have all the business plans." "No I can't make such a big down-payment." "I don't have that kind of cash." "Oh Mr. Lehmann please don't do this." "That restaurant means everything to me." "I mean, there must be something you can do." "Okay." "Well, thanks for tying." "What ?" "The loan was disapproved." "Why ?" "They need a twenty five percent down-payment." "So ?" "All my money's gone into the house, Ron." "Shit !" "Mine too." "Here you go princess." "We've reached your palace." "Thanks Jignesh." "I had a great time." "Nice movie ?" "Can I ask you something ?" "Do you still love that idiot ?" "But it doesn't hur so much now." "Besides I've given up hope of things changing." "is there anything I can do ?" "Just be there, like you always have." " l'm always there. I love you, yaar." "Jerk." "These are all the accounts that need to be cleared." "Take a look and please give me your share. I need the money." "Stop it Nick !" "What are you doing ?" "From now on, the curains I don't like will not be put up in the living room." "And I hate these damn candles." "You decorate your room however you like, I don't want to see any of this here." "You're doing this just because I asked you for my money ?" "The hell with your money." "Just take it all, okay ?" "Account cleared." "Fine ?" "Now you do your share." "You don't do the dishes." "Your pregnancy books and papers are scattered all over the living room." "Not a living room, it's a garbage dump." "I can't stand it." "We should put up a sign:" ""Please dump all your garbage in our living room.." "..there's enough space"" "Listen." "You like cleanliness, you clean it up." "Why the hell should I clean up your mess ?" "Then live with it - l am living with it." "I've lived in this stupid house with you for the last ten months, haven't I?" "I'm tolerating you too." "Do you hear me complaining?" " What the hell will you complain about?" "How am I bothering you?" " You show me your face." "Eveyday." "You live in the same house." "Isn't that enough ?" "Just get lost !" "I can't believe I gave up my restaurant for this madness." "What did you say ?" "I wasted all my savings just to live here with you, in this house, okay ?" "The money that I had saved up for my restaurant." "It's all gone, finished, over." "And for what ?" "A living room full of your shit !" "Was it my idea ?" "To live together, to rent this house ?" "I can't leave my bloody job because I took a loan for this house." "I'm going to work and I'm studying in this condition." "And you jerk, instead of helping me, you're giving me attitude ?" "What ?" "It kicked." "What ?" "It kicked." "It's the first time." "I can't feel.." "Oh my God !" "Yes." "Oh crap !" "Again." "Can you feel it ?" " Of course I can feel it lt's happening in my stomach." "Four butter nans, one butter daal." "Mixed vegetables please." "One butter chicken." "Something's off, boss." "Something's off ?" "It's okay." " Okay ?" "Just handle it, man." "Done ?" " Almost, boss." "Garnishing okay ?" "Looking like a mistress, right ?" "Listen, are you married ?" "Yes." "Any kids ?" "One son." "But my life's a living hell now." " Why ?" "He's sick for at least a couple of days evey week, cries all night." "Then there's the cost of food, clothes, toys, I can't even afford a holiday." "Exactly." "So you were happier before ?" "Hundred percent !" "In fact.." "..I was happier before marriage !" "No tension at all." "Then one shouldn't mary, right ?" " No way." "But there's one thing." "Sometimes when my son smiles at me, or grabs my finger.." "..it feels like everything's okay." "All my tensions drain away." "That feeling can only come from a kid." "I think he likes you." "You're having a baby ?" "First baby ?" "Yes." "You know, I think you're going to make a great father." "Okay, bye" " Bye." "Here are the books you ordered, Nick." " Thanks, John." "What are you doing ?" "I thought it was a thief !" " Thief !" "Do you remember that.." "..someone else also lives in this house?" " Yes, but you were being so quiet." "You always come in and switch on the lights, the tv.." "..Your door was open." "I was tying not to disturb you." "You were tying to.. what ?" "Now why are you awake at this hour ?" " l'm going out." "Now ?" "Where ?" " What do you care ?" "Come on, take it easy." "here are you going at eleven pm?" " l want to eat ice cream." "Ah, no problem." "Here. lce cream." "No. I want to have Ben and Jery's Belgian Dark Chocolate ice cream." "But I thought you didn't like chocolate ice cream ?" "Damn it Nick, you won't understand." "These things happen during a pregnancy." "When you have a craving.." "you can't think of anything else." "All I can think of is Ben and Jery's Belgian Dark Chocolate ice cream." "Okay, okay." "Get it tomorrow." " No Nick. I want it now !" "What do you care ?" "Go to sleep !" "Oh fine !" "Do what you want." "Chocolate, right ?" "What are you doing ?" "You wanted chocolate ice cream, right ?" "No, Nick." "Ambar, it's really late." "Please don't confuse me." "I want Ben and Jery's Belgian Dark Chocolate ice cream." "Where the hell will we find Ben and Jery's at this hour ?" "We'll find something." "It'll be open in St Kilda." " lt'll be closed." "It'll be open, I know." "Shit !" "That's impossible." "I mean, how can they be shut ?" "Are they allowed to close down ?" "It's only what, a quarer to twelve!" "The whole world wants to eat ice cream." "What if it's an emergency ?" "It could be a matter of life and death." "And they're shut ?" "Okay sory, but where will you find it at this time ?" "Have something else." "Nick, I have to have Ben.." " And Jery's Belgian Dark Chocolate... I know, I know." "But where ?" " l don't care." "What's going on man ?" "Fifteen to midnight, two souls on a roll.." "..what's goin' on ?" "When the roads are asleep where are we going to.." "..what's goin' on ?" "Why, who asked you out ?" "Why are you wagging behind me ?" "What's your bother, I'll do what I want." "Who are you to preach ?" "I'm on my way, what's up with you ?" "What's goin' on ?" "Just fifteen to midnight and two souls on a roll.." "what's goin' on ?" "Stop acting high-and-mighty." "It's a big bad world out here." "Where'd you learn to talk big ?" "Don't ty to save me from the world." "Why girl, you'll regret being gone." "You run now, but you'll return." "What I know is, once your're gone, you never return." "I'm on my way, what's up with you ?" "What's goin' on ?" "Come tell me this.." "..why do you care ?" "Who cares, you can get lost." "Live like a loner, if you can." "I'll live a loner, if I got to go it alone." "I'll take my losses and I'll get along." "Then get going," "..getting along, alone, go the long haul." "You ever had that dream about going to work wearing no clothes ?" "No ?" "I've seen it often." "And I feel exactly like that right now." "Two Ben and Jery's Belgian Dark Chocolate ice creams please." "Anything else sir ?" " No, just lots of it." "Thank you." "Stop it, people will think I'm doing something to you." "You know what ?" "I completely understand." "Thanks." "You're not eating. lsn't it nice ?" "It's perfect." "There's a cookey show on TV." "I'd really like to watch it." "Can I have the cable please ?" "Sure." " Thanks." "Thank you." "I'll keep the volume down. I promise." "Thanks." "Do you want to watch something ?" "No thanks." "Nick, I need to talk to you." "Tell me." "Nick you're not doing anything wrong." "You're not ready for a marriage and kids and you're being completely honest." "You're doing just what's right for you and what you want for yourself." "Who can understand this better than me ?" "I've always lived my life for myself." "I've never thought about how it might affect my mom and dad." "Who knows, maybe this is retribution." "Maybe it's all karma." "And only you could give me this lesson." "Because I've never loved anybody as much." "Look Amby, I." "Till now, it was all about me, my happiness, my pain, my life." "Not anymore, now everything has changed." "Now it's all about my baby." "This life that's growing inside me." "I can do anything for this baby, Nick." "I can endure anything." "But I can't imagine my baby being hur." "I'd decided never to ask you for anything for either me or my baby." "But today I've gathered the courage to ask you for something." "What ?" "I have a disorder in my blood." "Anything serious ?" "No. I'm thalassemia minor." "This doesn't affect me in any way." "But if you.." "if you have this disorder too, then there could be complications for the baby." "The child could be thalassemia major." "I don't have any complications." "Trust me. I am fine." "Nick, get a blood test, please." "What ?" "No way." "I'm telling you there's nothing wrong with me." "I've never had a problem in my life. I'm fine." "Nick you can't be sure unless you have the test." "Please, for me, for my baby, Nick. it's a small blood test." "Please, I beg of you." "Look Amby, ty and understand, I've never taken a blood test in my life." "I won't be able to do it." "I'm sory." "I asked you for such a little thing.." "I'm sory Amby." "I just can' t do it." "Go away Nick." "Nikhil Arora." "How can I help you ?" "It's about the pregnancy." "You're pregnant ?" "No I'm.." "I'm Ambar's boyfriend." "So you're the one who's scared of blood." "You're really scared aren't you ?" " Yes.. can we do this quickly ?" "You don't wory at all." "It won't even take a minute." "We just need to put a syringe in your vein and extract 10 ccs of blood." "Nick, are you okay ?" "No." "So please hury up and do what you have to do." "It's over." "Did it hur ?" "What ?" "It's over ?" "Are we done ?" "Can I go ?" " Sure." "You'll get the repor tomorrow." "You can take this copy of the sonography with you if you like." "Give it to Ambar." "Thank you." "And congratulations." "Oh, for the blood test ?" "No, for the twins." "Twins ?" "Yes." "Didn't Ambar tell you ?" "You're going to have twins I'm meeting you for the first time today in eight months of her pregnancy." "You're the father, Nick." "Don't you have any responsibility ?" "She's doing everything alone." "There's nobody to help her, neither her family, nor yours." "I've told her to rest but I don't think she's listening." "Nick, you need to suppor her, help her." "She's gone through this all alone and that's not fair." "She needs love, she needs to be cared for and only you can do this." "Please." "Please be there for her now, Nick." "Because I love you." "And maybe I want the right to have a say in your life, and I want to give you that right too." "Why are we afraid of giving this relationship a name, Nick ?" "I'm not afraid, Amby." "I'm not afraid of giving this relationship a name now." "I'll take this one." "Nick, you're not being fair." "The decision to separate was yours." "You weren't ready for commitment." "So what was she supposed to do ?" "Wait for you all her life ?" "Or wallow in sorrow ?" "Get real Nick, it's 2005." "Eveyone has a life." "Was it so easy for her ?" "You'd like it if it was difficult, right ?" "I still love her." " No you don't lf you did love her, you wouldn't have left her in this condition." "Couldn't she have waited a little while ?" "Did you tell her to wait ?" "Now you'll just have to live with that." "Hi baby." "Oh God. I'm so sory !" "Of course I remember." "Nick had a small problem." "No I'm not drinking with him !" "Really !" "I'll be right over baby." "Shit, yaar." "Cathy wanted to eat swiss rolls and I completely forgot." "I'll see you man, take care." "Don't drink too much, okay ?" "I'm not disturbing you, am I ?" "No, no. ls everything all right ?" "Somebody wanted to meet you." "Tina, meet Ambar." "Ambar, Tina." "I'd heard so much about you, I just had to meet you." "I'll get it." "It's a blank call, forget it." "So what's the date for the wedding ?" "Okay, Ambar." "When did I tell you to wait for me ?" "When did I say I was going to come back ?" "You be happy." "Be happy with that .." "idiot !" "Good luck. I love you." "You're talking to yourself." "Got no one else to talk to." "Buy me a drink ?" "Hi, I'm Nick and I'm vey drunk." "I'm Stella, and I'm quite drunk myself." "What fun !" "Andy, once you're done, I'd like you to load the couch into the truck, please." "No worries" " Thank you." "What's happening ?" "I don't want to wait till the end of the month. I'm moving out today." "Hey Ambar." "Where are you ?" "Pick up the phone." "The wedding date has finally been fixed." "Tina says meeting you yesterday was like finding an old friend." "I want to hear what you thought of Tina." "If you don't like her, then tell me now." "Our wedding's in a week." "Call me back." "Bye." "Jignesh and Tina." "Who.. what.. who.. what ?" "Who are you and what are you doing here ?" "That's really nice. I'm Stella." "We met at the bar last night." "Okay, you have to leave, now" " What ?" "Get me some coffee first !" "Your bloody coffee can.." "you have to leave now." "Why ?" " Because my mom will kill me." "And you." "My mom will kill us both !" "She's crazy !" "Put your clothes on quick.. and hury" "Hello." "Hi doctor." " Hi Ambar." "is something wrong ?" " Not at all." "I called to tell you that Nick's repors have come in." "Repors ?" " Of his blood test." "Nick went for a blood test ?" " Yesterday." "And honestly, he was scared." "Doctor, is everything all right ?" "Absolutely fine." "No signs of thalassemia." "I knew you'd be nervous." "So I called you personally." "Thank you doctor, thank you so much." "You're welcome honey." "See you next week." "What happened ?" " Nothing." "Hi." "Can I come in ?" " No, no !" "This is my room." "You go to your room." " What ?" "Yes." "My room is vey diry." "You want to talk, let's talk in your room." "Nick, is that your mom ?" "Hi mom, sory i was just leaving." "I never thought I'd ever say this to you." "Thank you for not loving me." "Thank you for not marying me." "Thank you for everything." "What've I done ?" "I'll tell you what you've done, you've done nothing." "What ?" " ls this any way to treat a girl ?" "You buy me drinks, get me drunk, we come back to your place and what do you do ?" "What did I do ?" " Nothing, that's just it." "Nothing." "You didn't kiss me, you didn't touch me." "Did I come here to hear your stories ?" "What kind of stories ?" " Who's this Ambar chic ?" "All night you kept cying, telling me how much you love Ambar." "Well, if you love Ambar so much, why did you waste my time ?" "I didn't do anything ?" " Not to me you didn't." "I didn't do anything !" "Yes, I knew it." "I didn't do anything !" "I didn't do anything !" "I didn't do anything !" "Yes, I knew it. I didn't do anything !" "Ambar, I didn't do anything." "is her stuff coming to your place ?" " Yes" "So where is Ambar ?" " l don't know." "Okay." "Whenever she calls, just tell her that Nick didn't do anything." "Okay ?" "Just tell her that." "She'll understand." "And tell Cathy as well." "Thanks." "Where are you Ambar ?" "Jignesh ?" "Nick here." "Where's Ambar ?" " Why should I tell you ?" "Look Jignesh, just tell me where she is" " You hur her, you know." "I know, I know." "She loves you, and all you did was make her cy, hur her.." "..Okay Jignesh, listen to me." "The next time I meet you, just slap me." "Twice. I won't say anything, I swear." "But just tell me where Ambar is right now." "I don't know." "You don't know ?" " No idea." "Then why the hell were you lecturing me for so long ?" "Okay, Look. I'm sory." "I misjudged you as well.." "I'm.." "I'm screwed up man." "Sometimes I get so stupid." " No problem." "Just don't hur her anymore." " l won't. I swear." "Please call me if you hear anything." " You got it." "And hey, congratulations." "For you and Tina." "Thanks." "See Ambar, I can be a nice man." "Where are you ?" "Salaam Namaste ladies and gentlemen." "I'm sure you still remember our Big Fight show, Hambar versus Nick." "On this vey show, Nick fell in love with Hambar." "But the stoy is not over." "Ladies and gentlemen, Salaam Namaste proudly presents," "Hambar versus Nick, par two." "My name is Nikhil Arora." "And I have lost something." "In fact, I have lost the most beautiful thing in the world." "nd l need your help to find it again." "Her name is Ambar." "She is the most beautiful girl in the world." "She's wearing a black-and-white dress, she's eight months pregnant." "And her eyes are red from cying." "If anyone sees her, please call me on 0409563700." "Don't wory Nick, I'm going to find Ambar for you." "Ambar !" "I'm coming." "Nick, I'll find Ambar for you ." "After showing her dreams of happiness, I've only caused her sorrow." "is he talking about you ?" "I'm sory." "Ambar, come back." "Please." "Not because you need me." "I know that you don't." "But I need you. I'm all alone without you, I'm incomplete." "I'll be your best friend, Ambar." "I'll be the best husband." "And I'll be the best father to our babies ." "One more thing, about what you saw this morning.." "I swear to you, nothing happened." "I didn't do anything." "I just kept calling out your name and cying the whole night." "Please believe me Ambar." "If anybody sees her, please call Nikhil Arora." "Please stop the taxi." "Just a minute." "I just need to make a shor call." "Stop the cab." "Take this." "Just stop." "Where ?" "Williamstown ?" "Best of luck buddy !" "Your speech got me so emotional !" "Buddy !" "I pray that your cab never runs out of fuel !" "Got it !" "Hambar versus." "Nick !" "How beautiful !" "Excuse me." "Route 72, going south ?" "Thank you vey much." "All the best mate." "Excuse me, can you please stop the bus ?" "Nikhil Arora ?" "Your lady love just stepped off the bus at fisherman's wharf." "I'm sory Amby." "Why are you doing this Nick ?" "Because ten years from now, when I wake up all alone and ask myself.." "why I didn't give Nick and Ambar a chance, I'll have only one answer." "That I'm the biggest idiot in the world." "And I don't want to be with the biggest idiot in the world." "People can change, right ?" "You didn't want to mary, now you do." "I didn't want to get married." "And now.." "..Amby, will you..." "Now what ?" "I think my water just broke." "What ?" "But there's still a month to go." "How can that be ?" "Ambar, you didn't answer me !" "Will you forgive me ?" "Please !" "I'm really vey-vey sory for all the pain I've caused you." "Can you forget all that and give me one more chance ?" "Okay, no problem." "You can think about it and give me an answer later." "Just shut up." "Just shut up." "I'll be right back." "Stay right here." "Where will I go you idiot, just go !" "Crap !" "You're right." "Too many emergency pregnancies.." "something to do with the Moon's position, a parial eclipse or some rubbish." "Anyway, your doctor's not free and no private room is available." "What do we do ?" "What do we do ?" "What do we do ?" "Take a semi-private room here or go to another hospital ?" "Another ?" "Nick, what the hell is wrong with you ?" "This isn't a bloody restaurant !" "Take what we're getting or I'll have the babies right here !" "Okay, a semi-private room." "Now listen Ambar, I'm really-really sory about everything." "If you give me one more chance.." "Okay, we'll talk later." "Okay lady, we're going to put you on the bed now." "One minute." "Listen." "You'll have to prop up your feet like this." "And then you'll have to breathe deeply, like this." "And then, when the time comes, you have to push, like this ." "Sory, I saw it on TV." "You probably know." "We'll help you on the bed now." "Hey sexy. it's you again." "Nick, do you know her ?" "Oh hi Mum, you're having another baby." "Okay, is there any other nurse ?" "No lover, eveyone's busy." "Nick, who is she ?" "I don't know, who are you ?" "Don't you remember, mum ?" "I was in the room this morning." "Amby." "Amby, please listen to me." "I swear nothing happened between us, ask her if you like." "You're Ambar !" "This guy really loves you." "All night he was cying saying, I love my Ambar, I miss my Ambar." "He wouldn't even let me kiss him." "He said, You're not Ambar." "See !" "See ?" "Nothing happened, Ambar, nothing happened." "Please believe me." "Now will you forgive me ?" "Ambar, I have to tell you.." "Okay crap, where's the doctor ?" "You're looking lovely !" "Nick !" "Isn't it amazing ?" "We're becoming daddies together." "I know. lsn't it cool ?" "Ron !" "Shut up. I'm talking to him." "I'm having your baby." "I'm sory baby, I'm sory." "Where the hell is the doctor ?" "Here I am !" "Allow me to introduce myself, a little later." "Who am I.. where am I ?" "Are you the doctor ?" "Doc, I need your introduction" " Of course !" "Myself Doctor Vijay Kumar, M.D.D.G.O." " What are you doing ?" "Fantastic !" "From where, from where ?" "Surat" " Surat !" "I like Surat" "Oh shut up Ron." "Where the hell have you been?" " l.. that, that.." "What that..?" " Where babies are born." "Delivey ?" " Delivey!" "I was in delivey." "Now where is she ?" " Who ?" "That, that..." " What that, yaar?" "The one who's delivering !" " Patient ?" "Patient !" "Where's the patient ?" "Here" " There." "Where's the other doctor ?" " Which other doctor ?" "How should I know ?" " Then how would I know ?" "Look, there are two patients here." "Can you handle both ?" "I hope so." "I hope so !" "You, you.." "I hope so..?" "Now where's that ?" "Who ?" "That, that.." " What that?" "The one who helps me." " Maid ?" "No." " Oh shut up Ron." "Nurse ?" "Nurse !" "Where is the nurse ?" " How do I know ?" "She must be inside !" " Lets go." "We're dead.." " We're dead !" "What guy is this ?" "Ambar, just do what he tells you to." "Just follow his instructions and ty to relax." "Everything will work out fine." "Will you please shut up ?" "I'm getting vey confused." "Give me a smile, just one smile." "What are you doing ?" " Give me that thing !" "What the hell is happening.." "I'm the doctor." "She's ready !" "You have to do.. that.." "do that.." " Do what ?" "What do you say for shove ?" "Push." "Push." "It really hurs." " What ?" "I'm in pain." " Pain ?" "You're in pain ?" "Come here and produce a baby." "Then you'll know what pain is, you bloody man !" "Oh shit !" "Nurse, Look after her." "Coming !" "Oh my god !" "You're also ready to push." "She needs to push." "Push." "Damn it Nick if you faint, I'll kill you !" "Blood." "I can't stand the sight of blood either." "What ?" "Just a small problem." "Hold her hand." "Actually, hold my hand also." "Push." "Okay push." "Nurse, nurse.." "Dear God, what a huge injection !" "I want that.. that.." "That, that.." "Cotton swabs ?" " No !" "What the hell does that Karan Johar guy drink ?" "Coffee ?" " Coffee !" "I want some coffee !" "Come on sister, you need to push !" "Yes baby, ya baby." "Go for it." "Push, push, push" "Come on come on, you're doing good All right." "Oh my god !" "Congrats. lt's a boy !" " A boy !" "It's a boy ?" "I was told a girl !" "What are you saying?" "There must be one more, check inside !" "There has to be a girl !" "I'm exhausted." "Excuse me, doctor." "There's one more patient." "What ?" "Okay, push." "I can see the head." "No, no, hold it." "What ?" " What ?" "Hold what ?" "Before the babies are born, please say you'll mary me." "Babies ?" "Double role ?" "Why do you want to mary me, Nick ?" "What's changed ?" "Everything, since I met you first." "You were pretty, smar, funny." "You were perfect." "And I fell in love with your perfection." "Then I saw your other side." "Your anger, moodswings, your stupidity" "Are you proposing to me or insulting me ?" " l saw you screaming for no reason, fighting without provocation." "I've seen you double-sized, I've seen you throwing up in my cap, on my carpet." "But my love never lessened." "I don't love you inspite of all this, I stared loving you because of this." "I just kept loving you even more." "I'm not perfect Ambar, neither are you, and life is never going to be perfect." "But you, you will always be perfect for me." "I love you Amby." "Please.." "please will you mary me ?" "What happened ?" "What happened ?" "Beautiful." "Well done, well done !" "What do you say on an occasion like this ?" "What, what ?" " That happy, felicitation-type greeting." "Congratulation ?" " Yes!" "Congratulations !" "Push baby, push baby !" "Push baby." "Sory no baby." "So push baby !" "Come on you can do it." "That's it." "You can do it." "You did it, you did it !" "I'm so relieved." "Doctor.." "Here you are." " Not I.. he did it" "You did it man." "One more." "Pretty good" " Thanks, doc." "Where's your wife ?" " No idea." "Cathy, where's Cathy?" "Good Mornig Melbourne Hello and welcome.." "..to your favourite-favourite radio station." "Salaam Namaste!" "And you're with me, Ambar.." "..cool as a cucumber, spicy as sambar, and... luck as a lottey number." "And for those of you.." "..who haven't crawled out of your blankets yet... that was your morning alarm." "It's just ten to nine." "And it's a warm summer morning in Melbourne city." "At nine sharp, tune into my program," "Chit-Chat, where l'll introduce you... to some successful Indians living in Melbourne, so that you too... are inspired to succeed." "Today we'll be talking to... the head chef of the Nick of Time restaurant, Nick." "That's in 10 minutes." "So stay tuned." "And till then... here's a song to keep your morning tea company." "Where's the fire guys?" "Nikhil Arora has had only one problem ever since he was a baby... he can't sleep at nights, and he can't wake up in the mornings." "Ever since, he has been strangely fascinated with cooking... and while other boys played cricket, he was playing kitchen-kitchen." "Growing up, his dad expressed a desire... that Nick would become an architect and.." "..join his construction business." "Nick fled to Melbourne to become an architect, but how could a guy who never drew a.." "straight line back home in India... design a Taj Mahal in Melbourne... ?" "His interest in cooking never left him and.." "Nikhil's paries were vey popular." "Somehow, Nikhil managed to become an architect and even landed... a commission to design a restaurant." "The owner never liked the outcome." "But he loved Nick's food." "And Nikhil Arora became... the head chef of the 'Nick of Time' restaurant," "Nick." "Slow it down, yaar." "Who's screaming and why ?" "I'm just..." "I'm almost there." "I'm right outside your studio yaar, I'm looking for parking." "Dude, please, give your throat a break." "I'm on my way, I'm already here." "Just walk to the door, I'm coming right in.." "There, I can see you." "Did the alarm ring?" "When Deepan Nair's holler reverberated through Kerala's greeney... coconuts fell off the trees, boats capsized in rivers and... birds were forced to migrate to Karnataka." "Migrating to Melbourne..." "Deepan Nair transformed into Debonair," "Was the 'mallu' with a passion, who, even if he can't sing, can still make you sing-a-song." "Now... he own Salaam Namaste radio station and keeps humming at work, in the hope that someday, someone will ask." "Why don't you ever sing on air?" "This is something that will never happen for another 40 years." "A for Ambar!" " Yay." "Hambar." "Nick is late !" "What do you mean, late?" " l think he's just woken up." "After Ambar rejected twelve men in Bangalore, her parents suspected that maybe she didn't want to get married at all." "She denied it, but it was the truth." "Her sister was the only example she needed." "When she came to Australia for a year for.." "a university exchange program," "Ambar fell in love... with Melbourne." "She decided to stay on and... joined medical school." "Her parents cut off all ties with her." "To pay for her education, she joined" "Salaam Namaste Radio Station... and soon became the most popular RJ there." "Salaam Namaste!" "And now it's time to talk to our celebrity guest, Nick" "But there's one slight problem." "And it's this..." "Nick isn't interested in talking to you." "So what if you happen to be... the same customers who shell out 10 dollars for his 2-dollar dish." "Nick doesn't care." "Which is why he never bothered coming here." "In fact, he's sleeping." "So it's obvious how much he values your time and mine." "Excuse me..." "And then I'd ask him why he changed." "his name from Nikhil Arora to Nick ?" "Nikhil is ugghhh." "Nick is cool ." "is he one of those Indians who are ashamed of being Indian ?" "I mean, what is this Nick business ?" "Yo. I'm cool. I'm Australian. I'm Nick." "Crap !" "What's she doing ?" "What's worh thinking about is, what else is Nikhil Arora ashamed of ?" "For example, is he ashamed of his face ?" "Maybe he's really ugly." "Maybe that's why he became a chef." "To hide inside kitchens... and not show his face around." "On that note, here's a song for you.." "What the..." "Hello..." "Nick here." "I'm almost there, yaar." "But this chick, your announcer, RJ-whatever... what's her name ?" "Hambar !" "Hambar ?" "What's this Hambar babe doing yaar ?" "is this any way to talk about a guest ?" "I want to talk to her." "Hello, is that Hambar ?" "Hambar, Nick here." "What... what're you doing ?" "Taking an interview." "Whose ?" " Yours" "But I'm not there yet." "Really ?" "I didn't even notice that." "Listen yaar..." "Listen yaar !" "You bloody Nikhil Arora !" "You......" "Hambar !" "Why the hell are you calling me Hambar ?" "Why the hell are you calling me Nikhil Arora ?" "Because it's your name." "No, my name is Nick." "Oh really !" "Well, if you'd been here, I'd call you whatever you wanted." "Nick, Nick, Marlon Brando." "Hello, what's your problem ?" "I hate latecomers." "Because of you my show didn't star on time." "How does one late star make a difference." "to a clutch of Indian taxi drivers ?" "Salaam Namaste people, and this is the end of the show." "And still, there's absolutely no sign of Nikhil Arora." "A small piece of advice, if you plan to go to 'Nick of Time' restaurant, be prepared to wait... breakfast may appear by lunch and lunch by dinnerime." "I think they should rename the restaurant 'Never on Time'." "Anyway, it's goodbye from me Ambar and keep listening to Salaam Namaste, 101 .5FM." "Hey mate, you're bleeding." "What ?" "Are you Okay ?" " l'm fine. I...." "I don't like blood." "You better see a doctor man." " No doctor." "I don't like doctors." "But you're bleeding" " Stop saying that." "Want to catch a movie ?" "So, Jignesh, what's your diagnosis ?" "The patient has been experiencing." "a vague pain in the abdomen, followed by severe bouts of constipation, vomiting, swelling, bleeding stools and progressive weakness." "A biopsy can be conclusive." "But my diagnosis suggests lymphosarcoma of the intestine, just what Rajesh Khanna had in Anand" "Made-in-Surat, raised-on-khakra-dhokli," "Jignesh Pandya's lone phobia was... that he'd spend his whole life squatting behind.." "the Archana Sarees cash register." "Unlike his father, the millions." "wouldn't make life worh swatting away." "Perhaps it was fear that drove him to pass the medical entrance test" "But now, homesick in Australia, he's regretting his decision." "Vey nice, Jignesh." "Good job." "Fory !" " But why ?" "Because I know, you've skipped homework.." "..and you'll copy it off me, so twenty more." "When dad finds out that he's sponsoring.." "..the education of two instead of one..." "Long live Archana Sarees !" "Now give me a hundred dollars more." " What for ?" "Because a friend is always there when you need him." "Forget it." "Why don't you go rob your dad ?" "Amby..." "I'm sory." "It's just a loan damn it !" "I won't charge you for the next five classes." "But, a hundred dollars..." "Simone's wedding." "I need to buy a dress." "Simone's... getting married ?" "Why ?" "Didn't you get an invitation ?" "No." "Don't feel bad, next time you will." "By the way, I'll need your car tomorrow." "Okay ?" "Thank you !" "Bye !" "Why the hell do you want to ruin my reputation ?" "You forgot the bay leaf, the cardamom is almost non-existent" "And please, eveybody, come here." "Just because salt is cheap does.." "..not mean we need to put it in everything." "We are not in India now..." "please, go easy on the salt." "Now, I need to go and pee." "Promise me..." "You won't use the next five minutes to ruin another dish." "Promise me !" "We promise, boss !" "Thank you !" "Excuse me." "Looks just like home-cooked food." " Thank you boss" "So who needs to eat out ?" "They could have just made this at home." "Do you know the difference between a wife and a mistress ?" "I don't have either, boss." "No ?" "A wife wears a sari, a mistress wears a micro-mini." "A wife wears a wedding thread, for the mistress, a diamond necklace." "A wife wears a cotton nightgown, the mistress gets a red lingerie." "And that is now a mistress." "Get it ?" "Good." "Boss." "Dheka's looking for you." " So ?" "He looks quite angy !" " Tell me something I don't know." "I've dammed a waterfall here." "It's amazing how Aslam Dheka flew from.." "..Dhaka to Melbourne on one ticket." "He sat on two seats and ate enough food for three." "The sound of his belch is still echoing in that Boeing 7 47." "He spent his life savings in buying a hot dog stall." "Dheka was a happy man... ..he ate some and he sold some." "Then luck smiled on him." "While a lawyer was eating his last hot.." "..dog a drunken driver trashed his car." "They sued and Dheka struck gold." "Overnight he became the owner and chief patron of 'Nick of Time'." "You see ?" "See what ?" "See nothing !" "No people, no customers, no-one !" "Why ?" "How should I know ?" "Salaam Namaste !" "(Greetings)" "Same to you." "All this happening because of your radio station !" "You are going late and my restaurant is being insulted." "Now you better not being late, ever again !" "And if you are, I will fire you !" "Understand." "Tomorrow, ten o' clock sharp !" "Understand ?" "Otherwise..." "Fire ?" "Murder !" "Are you hearing the radio ?" "No, what is happening ?" "You put on radio and listen." "So Radhika, your first novel is releasing tomorrow." "How are you going to celebrate ?" "I guess I'll celebrate with my husband." "Romantic dinner, pop some champagne." "Which restaurant ?" "Not Nick of Time, I hope ?" "Why ?" "I've heard it's a nice place." "Come on Radhika." "Eating what someone else has cooked is.." "..like putting your life in their hands." "Like a doctor, right ?" " Right." "Then can you trust a man who lies, who is never on time and... who doesn't even have the decency to apologise for making you wait ?" "I think it's disgusting." "Tell me..." "Would you tolerate this behaviour from your husband ?" "I'm sory, but what's the connection ?" " There is a connection !" "How can you trust a man who's ashamed to be an Indian ?" "My god, you're really angy." "Yes." "And Mr Nikhil Arora will have to face my anger until... he calls and apologises to my listeners." "It'll just break." "Oh come on Dheka, who listens to that show anyway ?" "I will tell you who is listening." "My wife is listening, my son is listening." "My family is listening, eveybody is calling and asking me, what is this ?" "They're all freeloaders anyway." "Think of all the money you'll save." "I will kill you." "For the bad name you are giving to my restaurant, I'll kill you." "Dheka, relax." "You'll have a hear attack." "I'll just call Hambar and fix everything." "Good." "Are you at the wedding ?" " Just parking my car." "I'm almost there, yaar." "Hello ?" "Hello, I can't hear you." "Nice day isn't it ?" "I'm Ron....." "Ron." "I'm Lisa." "Lisa." "Lisa's such a nice name, Lisa." "What do you do, Lisa ?" "For 50 bucks, anything you want." "During his college days, Ranjan Mathur was so busy studying... that he was oblivious to the basic differences between boys and girls." "Although he became a successful architect, his vision cleared up one day, when he suddenly realized that the world didn't just consist of buildings." "There were other shapes as well and they were much more interesting." "Since then, he has been wearing his hear on his sleeve, aiming for evey girl crossing his sights, hoping that someday, somehow... he'll manage to snag one for himself." "I've got to go..." "Thank you..." " Ok..." "Ok..." "Fory..." "Who was that ?" "A friend." "From office ?" " No." "She lives nearby." "What was her name ?" " Lisa." "Let's give her a lift, yaar." "The poor girl's standing all alone at the bus stop." "No." "She's going the other way." "So it's pointless." "What... ?" " How much was she asking for ?" "Fory dollars." "Ron !" "Can't you tell ?" "How could I ?" "She smiled sweetly, shook hands, even said her name." "I thought she was so friendly." "You must've stared planning your wedding already." "What rubbish !" "I'm not that frustrated." "Only the engagement." "Tell me something, why am I coming with you ?" "Because weddings are vey boring and I don't want to get bored alone." "Thanks" " You're welcome." "So, what are we listening ?" "Salaam Namaste." "What ?" " l love to hear you being praised on air." "Oh crap !" "You've heard it too ?" "Of course, it's damn good fun !" "That RJ is making you famous." "You think this is funny ?" " Vey." "You're laughing and I've lost half my clientele at the restaurant." "Sue them." "Sue the damn radio station, yeah ?" "Causing of emotional distress, mental trauma, character assassination." "Hang on, let me just call that Debonair character." "You be ready with this." "Hello." "I am going to sue you !" "Who is speaking please ?" " This is Nick and I am going to sue you." "What for ?" " What for !" "For... emotional distress and..." " Mental trauma, character assassination." "I'm with a vey big lawyer right now !" " My friend is with a vey big lawyer." "No, no !" "Not me !" "You, you are !" " No-no... you, you." "My friend is a vey big lawyer." "See, Mr Nikhil Arora..." "Stop calling me that !" "If one more person calls me Nikhil Arora, then I will..." "I'll... I'll never talk to you again." " l'll never talk..." "Sory yaar, I couldn't think of anything else." "Listen !" "Why don't you talk directly to Hambar ?" "Oh sure, come on." "Give me Hambar's number." "Don't wory. I will connect you." "Hold on." "Hello listeners." "Breaking news on Salaam Namaste." "Nikhil Arora has just called to apologise to Hambar." "We are taking you live to the conversation." "Hello." "Hambar ?" "Ambar." "The name is Ambar." "A, A for Ambar." "Oh... and the name is Nick, not Nikhil Arora, Okay ?" "You !" " Yes !" "So you've finally decided to be sensible and say sory." "Sory ?" "Are you crazy ?" "I'm calling because... what you're doing is not right." "And what am I doing ?" "You're ruining my reputation." "How ?" "By calling me Nikhil Arora for a star." "Oh, I am so sory." "I had no idea you hated your name so much." "I won't do it again." "Thank you." "Nikhil Arora." "Nikhil..." "Arora." "Stop it !" "Star singing her name as well." "What are you doing ?" "If you can sing my name, I can sing yours." "Listen, what's your problem ?" "What's your problem ?" "Just because I was a little late for your stupid show, you're tying to destroy my life, my career, everything ?" "I would have tolerated your coming late, if you had the decency to call and apologise." "Apologise ?" "For a two-bit radio show ?" "Forget it !" "Two-bit ?" "Fine !" "Now just wait and watch... how this two-bit radio show transforms you from a chef to a waiter" "Sory." "Ah, sory." "That's better." "You've finally come to your senses." "What ?" "I wasn't talking to you." "It's all right Nikhil." "There's nothing to be ashamed of." "You made a mistake, and now you've apologized." "Now listen to me. I'm going to give you another chance." "But for that... you'll have to come on time for my show." " l have an idea... stuff your show in a bag: a garbage truck visits my restaurant evey night." "Nice one." "I'm sure it does." "No one eats at your joint anyway... it must all go down the drain." "Give her a last warning." "Look Ambar, this is your last warning..." "Stuff your last warning and listen to me." "Unless you appear on my show and apologise to my listeners... I won't let you off the hook." "Now choose one." "Your pride or your career ?" "You'll sacrifice at least one of them." "You !" "You..." "Salaam Namaste." "What happened ?" "I think I won." "Good." "Well done, I'm proud of you." "Obviously you're not gaping like that at my food." "My palm is itching." "I have a feeling that the line of romance is finally emerging." "Congratulations." "Who've you fallen for now ?" "All five. I'm going to ty for all five of them." "I'll drop my handkerchief and pick it up with a..." "Excuse me, I think you dropped this." "Ron, it has your name on it." "Damn." "Yes !" "I'll drop it, pick it up and say, lt's mine, would you like to keep it ?" "Okay Ron, I have a lot of work." "Oi !" "Drop that !" "Why ?" "Because it's not lunch-time yet." "And you're spoiling my arrangement." "Buzz off." "You..." "What're you doing ?" "He's a kid." "That's the problem." "Why do people have kids ?" "Why can't we just be born adults?" "Irritating bloody creatures." "Hello." "She's going to break my back." "Who's that guy ?" " l don't know." "Any luck ?" "Lesbians." "The first one said we've never met before." "The second one said the handkerchief wasn't hers" "The third one said "thank you", took it and left." "And then, the Japanese girl." "First she bowed, then I bowed." "She bowed again, so I bowed again." "Before I straightened up, she was gone." "Mind-blowing." "So who's left ?" "That Indian chick." "She's quite hot." "Yes and vey smar." "She's studying to be a surgeon." "She's in college with Simone." "You've obviously done your research." "Especially her." "Because you've been staring at her for so long." "I don't know yaar, there's something about her." "There is, there is." "Why don't you ask her for a dance ?" " Really ?" "You must." "Got your handkerchief ?" "Oye... chef or architect ?" " l think chefs cooler." "She's going to be a surgeon." "Architect then." " Good choice." "Need some help?" "I give a vey good foot massage." "Really, I have like a..." "black belt in foot massaging." "Really ?" "And how many girls have you tried that line on ?" "We're all born with cerain qualities." "You're beautiful, I give a good foot massage." "Nice dodge of the bouquet, by the way." "You noticed ?" "Quite impressive." "They say that if you catch the bouquet, you're next in line to get married." "I know." "So I didn't take a chance." "You have a problem with marriage ?" " Just a small one." "What ?" "Husbands." "So you're going to be a surgeon ?" " ls the news out already ?" "My friend over there..." "Ron." "He keeps a tab on all the pretty girls." "You're tying to give me a compliment." " You noticed ?" "Quite impressive." "Dance ?" " l'm sory, my shoes hur." "So leave them here." "Don't be silly." " No, I'm serious." "Come on, I'll take mine off as well." "Come on." "A friend of mine keeps tabs on all the handsome boys as well." "Funny, she never mentioned you." "What's your name ?" "Nick." "Why ?" "It's a nice name." "And, what do you do ?" " l'm an architect." "Architect ?" " Yes, why ?" "I mean, what do I look like ?" "No..." "I just happen to know another Nick." " And I thought I was going to be... the first Nick of your life." "Oh crap !" "What happened ?" "I hate kids !" " You hate kids ?" "I mean, not like that, but when their parents let them loose... I mean, there ought to be some discipline, right ?" "I'm sory." "You like kids huh ?" "Love them." "Sarah, Amby, come on all the bridesmaids, lets take a photo." "Excuse me." "Don't go." "Wait, hold it !" "Wait !" "Wait for me !" "Oh god, did I miss your wedding ?" "Yes, I can't believe you missed my wedding." "I am so sory baby, I'll make it up to you, I promise." "Nick, I'm in love." "Right" " No really, I'm in love." "I'm in love with that girl !" "I'm going to mary her, have kids with her and... I'll spend the rest of my life with her. I swear it !" "No more champagne for you." "Where's my handkerchief ... my handkerchief ?" "Say cheese." "Eveybody !" "Out of your clothes !" "One day, one moment, one life is... alive in now, tomorrow flies." "This day, this moment, this life, lives only for now, tomorrow flies... like she flies." "So, embrace life with a smile and say..." "Salaam Namaste, greet life today." "Everything alive is... swinging to life." "come and discover the signs of life." "But how long really... will it all last... crumbling like walls once the moment is past." "So lift your hands, clap a bhangra beat, come my love, let our hearbeats meet." "A moment's ecstasy, a moment's excuse, time's so hearless, so what's the use ?" "My love, my love, my love" "So, embrace life with a smile and say..." "Salaam Namaste, greet life today" "Once upon a road... you'll find a boy... who'll be passionate... and give you evey joy." "Then put it in words, around a smile." "Ty your luck, she may be worhwhile." "Life flies, so make it quick, say your stoy now, my love." "Youth and time are going, then gone: never to return, my love." "So, embrace life with a smile and say..." "Salaam Namaste, greet life today." "Why are you in a suit ?" "Nick, how long does it take to get to know someone ?" "Depends." "Sometimes one meeting can be enough, sometimes a lifetime falls shor." "One meeting... so I'm not being hasty then ?" "What are you talking about Ron ?" "I'm getting married, yaar." "Good for you." "I need some coffee." "Ron, are you serious ?" "When ?" "To who ?" "Can't believe Cathy." "Can't believe Ron." "I still owe you a foot massage." "I know, my feet are really huring." "Apparently coffee's really good for the feet as well." "Really ?" "You're a doctor, you should know." "So, shall we ?" "I'm sory, I have work." "Well actually, even I have a few appointments." "Okay." "Some other time then ?" "Sure." "Okay, bye." "Bye." "Amby." "Are you sure you've got to go ?" "Okay, let me check." "Hi, it's me Ambar." "Not Hambar, Ambar." "A. A for Ambar." "Forget it." "Can somebody cover my show today ?" "It's okay, I'll be there." "Sory." "What happened ?" " Hambar ?" "My boss Debonair." "He can't say Ambar." "I guess..." "I'll be going." "Boss, everything's in the van." "I'll see you at the restaurant." "Architect." "Doctor." "Nikhil Arora." "Hambar." "Shit !" "Crap !" "And she's completely ruined my reputation." "You're right." " But what a girl !" "She's pretty, smar, funny." "You're right." " But she keeps calling me Nikhil Arora." "She hates me." "You're right." " But she can really play volleyball, man." "But he's never on time and he's vey rude." "That's true." " But he's a damn good cook." "The food at the wedding was superb !" " That's true." "So, should I call her or not ?" " Call her." "What if she insults me again ?" " You weren't any better." "You threatened to sue her." " But you told me to say that." "And I'm telling you to call her." "How can I call him ?" "He'll never talk to me." "You insulted him first, you should call him first." "But she stared it." "She should call first." "But he threatened to sue me." "He should call first." "It doesn't really matter who calls first." "Look, I think you ought to..." "You're calling him ?" "Busy." "He'll call me if he wants to." "What happened?" "Well...?" "Busy." "Forget it, she'll call if she wants to." "He was here at seven o'clock sharp for the interview." "The leopard changes his spots !" "Hambar versus Nick." "Aren't you going to give me the rest ?" "These are for Debonair." "Hambar versus Nick !" "Are you a chef or an architect ?" "Well, an architect by qualification." "But a chef by choice." "Then why did you become an architect ?" " To make my Dad happy." "And why did you become a chef ?" " To make myself happy." "All right ." "So if you meet a beautiful girl and she asks you what you do." "what will you say ?" "If the girl is well-educated, like a lawyer or a doctor.." "..then I'll say I'm an architect." "But if she's creative, like a writer or an RJ.." "..then I'm a chef." " Oh, so your truth is changeable." "Well, truth is like a recipe." "Some things you hide and some you reveal.." "So what's the one vital truth that you've hidden so far and from whom ?" "My wife doesn't know that we're married." "Sory, just kidding." "Hambar !" "What is this ?" "Attack !" "Charge !" "If you became an architect to please your Dad and a chef to please yourself.." "..what will you do to please your mother ?" "Mary a nice Indian girl ?" "Well, I don't believe in marriage." "But if Mom was alive then, yes, perhaps I'd even do that for her sake." "Oh I'm so sory" " That's Okay ." "Were you vey close to her ?" "Vey. I was only foureen." "So young ." "What is this !" "Where is Hambar versus Nick ?" "What is your favourite dish ?" "I'd have to say, Indian meatballs." "Will you tell us the recipe ?" "This is your punishment for being late." "Sure, you're going to need onions, ginger, coriander, capsicum.." "Slowly, slowly !" "Give our listeners time to write this down." "Okay sory ." "Mint, green chillies, sunflower oil." "I love you ." "I love you ." "Are you crazy ?" "." "No ." "Then what are you saying ?" " That I love you ." "You're nuts." "Why ?" "Because I love you ?" "You don't love me." "Excuse me, how do you know that ?" "Look, you decide whether you love me or not, that's your choice." "Don't tell me that I'm not in love with you." "Mr Nikhil Arora.." "The name is Nick ." "Nick, Nick you are sick !" "." "You're doing this just to irritate me because I insulted you on air." "No, you were right in doing that." "I was late. I'm just.." "All right, I'm putting an end to this ." "Interview over." "Okay people, time to listen to some music Salaam Namaste 101 .5" "FM." "Lovely, mindblowing !" "Amazing !" "Ambar.." "Amby listen to me." "Go away." "But what have I done ?" "Why are you so angy ?" "How long have you known me ?" "For five days." "Five days ?" "Well, I'm counting two days on the phone as well." "Listen, you don't even know me." "I do." "Really ?" "What do you know about me ?" " Well.." "You're an RJ, you're studying to be a surgeon." "You're vey beautiful, you dance vey well.." "..you're superb at playing volleyball, you hate latecomers.. and I love you." "You.. you can't be in love with me." " Why ?" "What's wrong with you ?" "With me ?" "Nothing's wrong with me, the problem's with you." "Get your head checked." "You think a two-day acquaintance is love !" " What else can you call this ?" "Ever since I've met you, I haven't been able to think of anything else." "And don't tell me that you don't feel a connection." "Yesterday, there was something between us." "And there still is, today." "Yes there is." "But it can't be love." "Why ?" "Amby listen.." "Excuse me." "Yes ?" " Hello ." "What ?" "Oh crap ." "I'm on my way." "I'm coming ." "You told me to get married right ?" "It's all your fault." "You were the one who told me to go around dropping handkerchiefs." "This is what happens.." "when you make rash decisions." "Fall in love in one day.." "Five days." " Get married in two." "It's not a joke." "You don't know each other, you don't know anything about each other.." "and you decide to spend the rest of your lives together ?" "Really stupid." " Yes, he is." "But who's talking about marriage ?" "If we need to know each other, let's do that." "If we need to understand each other, let's spend time together." "And all this because I play good volleyball ?" "No !" "Because maybe this is love, and maybe not." "Unless we give this feeling a chance how will we find out ?" "It won't work Nick - l know, it just won't work, Nick." "Why ?" "Because he's a pig." "By the time you wake up, I'm at the radio station." "You're working at the restaurant from afternoon till night.." "I'm in college, then I'm studying." "How do we meet ?" "Where's the time Nick ?" "So.." "so let's live together." "What ?" "Yes !" "Think.." "you live in the hostel all alone, and I live all alone." "Let's live together." "What's he saying ?" "I'm just saying that Amby and I should live together, you know." "That way we.." " You're talking about yourselves !" "Cathy, wait." "Nick, no." "I'm not going to live with you." "Why ?" "You just said that we don't have the time to meet each other." "This way we'll get the chance to spend some time together, live together." "Nick, we've just met three days ago." "How can I live with you ?" "So should we let go of our feelings because our work timings don't match ?" "Look Amby, I don't know what we have between us." "But I want to know.." "because if this is love, then I don't want to lose it." "No Nick." "Hey, wait a minute.." "you're not thinking.." "listen.." "We'll live in separate rooms." "I don't mean living together like.." "you're not thinking that, are you ?" "I don't mean that." "Just what do you mean Nick ?" " l'll tell you." "We'll live in the same house, we'll eat breakfast together, watch TV together" "And we'll share the chores." "Then you'll find out.." "what I'm actually like, how I live at home, when I wake up.." "In the afternoon." "Vey funny, but listen.." "I'll find out what you're like, what you like doing, what your problems are.." "which shows you like watching, which games you like playing." "Do you like scrabble ?" " l love scrabble." "See ?" "I can't play scrabble." "My spellings suck." "Monopoly ?" "And think about it, you'll never need to cook." "Nick, it's too hasty" "Maybe.." "But if we can't tolerate each other, then we just go our separate ways." "Simple" "It's not so simple Nick." "I'm sory." "Fine." "Maybe you're right." "Maybe there's nothing between us." "And even if there is, it'll go away." "Life moves on." "But ten years later, when you wake up one morning.." "to find a fat, rich doctor snoring next to you.." "won't you ask yourself, Was there something there ?" "Could something have happened ?" "But then, there will be no answers" "Because you didn't give it a chance." "Maybe Nick and Ambar could've been something, maybe not.." "but we'll never find out." "Amby !" "Amby, it's Ron." "He's calling on the phone." "What do I do ?" "Come." "I won't ever have to cook ?" "What ?" "I won't ever have to cook ?" "Not an omelette, not even a cup of tea." "And separate rooms ?" "Far away from each other." "Okay." "So, should we star looking for a house ?" "Wow !" " Control yourself." "Let's talk this over first." "I don't the trust Indians." "What's that ?" "Babes, what I always say about Indians ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "Means, I don't the trust Indians." "Hating Jaggu Yadav was, is and always will be vey easy." "After migrating from Bihar to Mumbai, it seemed for a while that.." "he would never strike it rich." "He kept getting pushed around from one place to the next." "Someone suggested going abroad and driving a cab." "And so he arrived in Melbourne" "Then he won the lottey." "His luck took a turn for the better, but his personality stayed the same" "Hopefully you won't like him too much, because he definitely doesn't like you" "But you're Indian yourself, and.." "I was Indian.. was." "Now, I'm Australian." "Get it, mate ?" " Got it ." "There are two kinds of Indians." "Babes, what the two kinds of Indians are ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "One, the kind you can't trust." "And two, the kind you can't tolerate." "Look, we just want to rent your house." "We don't want to cause any problems I see that, I see that." "I can see you're Okay." "Nice, married couple." "Married couples I trust." "When did you get married ?" "Soon.." " A week ago." "We thought it would happen soon, then a week ago it suddenly happened" "Quick engagement, instant marriage." "And kids ?" "There wasn't really much time or they would've happened as well" "Funny guys." "Senses of humour ." "I like that." "Come, let me show you the house." "Babes." "Home the sweets' home." "What ?" "What are you looking for ?" "Nothing." "Just checking to see if it opens." "This is not an Indian public loo where things that are closed don't open.." "and things that are open don't close." "This is Australia mate." "Open." "Close." "Okay, mate ?" "Where's the other bathroom ?" "Another bathroom.. what for ?" "Just in case we have guests over.." " No guests." "I do not want any guests in here." "Looks here." "Just the twos of you." "Babes." "Tell them how much I hate guests." "Sory ?" "Exactly." "Whether you agree or not, no guests." "So, you are wanting the house ?" "Just a second.." " No second, only first." "Nice house, but this Crocodile Dundee is making me nervous." "It's not like we have to live with him." "Nice rooms. I want the bigger one." "The kitchen's quite cool as well." "Let me talk to him." "Crap !" "You scared me." "I have that effect on the peoples." "It's my personality." "So, you wanting the house ?" "Well, Okay." "One year's rents in advance." "What ?" "Translates, read my lips." "I need one year's rent in advance." "Babes." "Don't I always take the rents in the advance ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly !" " But why ?" "Shor term memories, huh ?" " Mammaries ?" "I don't trust Indians." "One year's rent in advance !" "Does he think his dad owns the place ?" " No, he does" "And where will you get the money from ?" " l encashed my bonds." "What ?" "Nick, you'd saved that money to star your own restaurant." "I know." "And how is Ambar getting the money ?" " She's taking a loan against her salay I hope you guys know what you're doing." "All this is happening so fast.." " Are you really saying this ?" "One afternoon you meet five girls:" "next morning you've married one of them" "And I'm regretting it now." "You don't know these girls !" "Firstly, their logic switch is permanently off." "And if they ever switch it on by mistake, the regulator always stays on zero" "But that's true." "Amby, where do you want.." "Has all the stuff arrived ?" "Everything." "is this.. staying up there ?" "Yes, why ?" "Ummm...no. lt's vey nice." "You're right." "I'll put it up in my bedroom." "Nick !" "We are moving back together." "Are you Okay, podgy ?" " l'm all right, okay" "Amby, guess what.." "You okay, podgy ?" "So, she turned her logic switch on ?" " No, I turned mine off." "Thought so." "So the divorce is cancelled ?" " Absolutely." "Cancel, cancel, cancel" "Until when ?" " Forever." "But still, please keep a room for me." "You never know when she'll kick me out" "Sory buddy, that's Ambar's room." " What do you mean ?" "Which word didn't you understand, Ambar or room ?" "I didn't understand anything." "Dude !" "You'll live in separate rooms ?" "What's he saying in Hindi ?" "is he laughing at me ?" "Yes, he's being vey rude." "They're living in together but in different rooms." "Can you believe it ?" "Oh podgy-wodgy, stop it !" "You guys can go to your separate rooms, we're going to our single room" "All right guys, see you man." "Bye." "Living separately, can you believe it?" "Two different rooms !" "Unbelievable. !" "Today's the first day so you don't have to cook dinner." "Wow, thanks boss." "Shall we order in?" "Sure." "What do you feel like having ?" "Chinese ?" "Mexican ?" "Indian?" "Pizza." "A nice, hot, crispy, yummy pizza." "My mouth's watering." "You don't like pizza ?" "No, it's not that. I only.." " Forget it." "Let's get something else." "No, I'm fine with pizza." "I've had pizza. I.." "Nick, you don't have to like everything that I do." "But I like pizza." "I owe you three dollars." " You had only one slice, so one dollar." "Okay" "Let's settle accounts on Sunday ?" "Fine." "And this one's my treat." "Wow." "Thank you." "What do I get ?" "One second." "Ambar, meet Romeo." "Romeo, meet Ambar." "Oh, Romeo says hi." " Hi Romeo." "Where's Juliet ?" "In my room." "But don't wory Romeo." "Nothing will happen between us in your absence." "I don't think he's listening to you." "He's checking me out." "I was afraid of that." "Oi !" "Behave yourself." "If Romeo misbehaves with me, it's going to be your fault." "Come on Romeo, let's get to know each other." "Say good night to Nick." "Are you sleeping ?" "I've got to go to the radio station in the morning." "Oh, Okay, I'll clear this up." " Let it be." "We'll clear up in the morning." "Let me guess, if we don't clean up now, you won't be able to sleep all night ?" "No, no, nothing like that." "We'll do it in the morning." "Where are you going ?" "If you can tolerate my pizza, I can definitely tolerate cleaning up." "My sister got married when she was eighteen." "By the time she was my age, she had two kids." "I saw her life.. housework, cooking, looking after the kids." "Weren't you being forced to mary ?" " Of course.. you've graduated now.." "all the nice boys will get married.." "it's our last responsibility." "I got all of that." "You fought with them and came here ?" " Yes." "Four years ago." "Dad was vey angy." "I think Mom understands, but she doesn't have the courage to speak out" "Do you talk to them ?" " Mom calls me on the sly sometimes." "But I haven't heard Dad's voice in four years." "I've got only one life Nick." "I want to live it for myself." "Believe me, I understand." "Done." "Can I go to sleep now ?" " Sure." "I hope at least some of our habits match." "They will." "I can't believe you don't like pizza." "I like pizza." "Sometimes." "Good night." "Good night." "You don't need to latch the door." "If I didn't trust you, I wouldn't have agreed to live with you." "Good night." "Good night." "Keep it low." "You'll wake up Crocodile Dundee." "I swear." "What a guy !" "And that strange girl who stays with him." "What's that ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "I still think I love you." "Tell me in the morning." "Stop staring." "Sory." "How come you're up so early ?" " Thanks to a whole lot of alarms." "Why ?" "So that I could see you go from the bathroom to the bedroom." "Right." "You know something.." "you look beautiful." "Thank you." "And you smell great." "Thank you." "Now I'm shy, and I'm going to go to my room." "Listen." "Have you got ten minutes ?" "Why ?" "Tell me." "Just ten minutes ?" "Yes." "Good." "Come with me." "I can't believe you woke up specially to make me breakfast." "Breakfast is the most imporant meal of the day." "You'll eat a proper breakfast evey day now." "Think about it." "You'll have to get up early evey morning. - l'll get used to it." "Oh God I'm really late." "Wait." "Have you got ten seconds ?" "I've got to go." "Bye !" "Frustrated yet smiling." "I just don't understand women, yaar !" "I mean, if you don't want an answer then why ask the question ?" "It's unbelievable, yaar !" "Thrice, thrice I told her." "No, you haven't put on weight !" "And then she stared up again." "Say swear, say swear." "So I said.." "It's okay if you've put on a couple of kilos." "Doesn't make a difference to me." "Oh !" "Wrong answer !" " l know, I know" "That's where the whole fight began." "And then our families got involved." "How ?" "We stared abusing each other's families." "What ?" "And you won't believe what she did after that." "She bloody stared throwing biscuits at me, yaar." "And not the whole packet." "She was throwing them one by one.." "aiming each one at me !" " Crap !" "So what did you do ?" "Ate them all." "She kept throwing and I kept eating." "What ?" "I know it sounds funny." "When you're angy it all makes sense." "Then ?" " Then, she ran out of biscuits." "And began cying." "I want to go to my mom's house, I don't love you, I don't want to be here" "So I thought it's Thursday night, boys' night out, let her go." "I'll apologise tomorrow." "Besides, what would she do here anyway ?" "You should've called her." "Nick !" "Boys' night out !" "You and me are boys !" "And I'm married to Cathy." "I know, she's not a boy." "Hi boys" "Hi." "What are you doing here ?" "Why ?" "Nick asked me." "Boys' night out, yaar!" " She was at Simone's, round the corner." "I said we'll go home together." "Why ?" "is there a problem ?" "No." " No, no problem at all, just that.." "if I'd known you'd be here, I'd have called Cathy as well for the boy's night out" "How was your day ?" " College was bad." "You want some sushi ?" " No thanks." "Listen, have I put on weight ?" "Put on ?" "I think you need to gain a few kilos." "Really ?" "The goods mornings." "Goods morning." "I likes." "You're learning how to speak correct English." "When in the Rome, do the Romans." "By way, where the goings ?" "I'm going to work." "Damn goods you work." "I like working women a lot." "Babes, what I always say about woman-working ?" "Sory ?" "Exactly." "You miss the spots there." "Sory ?" "Sory, sory !" "You missed the bloody spots there." "You are wanting the Dundee daddies to give you spanking on your bums ?" "Ghost of the kicks not listening to talks."