"Is he stupid?" "!" "Yes, John!" "Yes, I got the cards and the flowers and the chocolates." "Yes, I got the cushion, as well." "But it's finished." "Sorry!" "[John on the phone] But please, don't leave me!" "Don't cry!" "Oh, goodbye!" "Oh, and happy birthday!" "Ah!" "Men!" "Come on Charley, come on." "Post, Bridget." "Charley and I have the post." "Haven't we, Charley?" "Give me the post, Charley." "Give me the post, Charley." "Drop it, Charley." "Oh, good boy!" "Oh, telephone bill, gas bill, electricity bill." "Oh." "Ah, what's this?" "Mmm, a parcel for you, Bridget." "Oh, good." "What is it?" "Oh, it's from mother." "Oh, 'Bridget darling, this arrived for you and I made you this." "Love Mummy.'" "Oh, ho-ho, oh very you, Bridget!" "Mother!" "Ooh, this is from Argentina." "Argentina." "Who from?" "What does it say?" "[Erm], it says 'Hello, do you remember me?" "'" "No." "'Seven years ago we was pen pals.'" "'We was' - we were pen pals." "Oh yeah, now I remember, it's Hector!" "Who's Hector?" "He was my pen pal seven years ago." "Oh..." "'I speak English good now.' I speak English good." "I speak English well now – 'and I am coming to England.'" "Oh, Latin Americans!" "'I would like to sleep with you." "Do you have a bed for me?" "'" "Oh, he wants to stay here!" "[Oh]." "Ah, ha, ha." "But [erm] what about the rules?" "Ooh, a Latin American here, ooh, like Ricky Martin!" "Tall, handsome, rich!" "So [erm] when is he coming?" "Oh [erm] let me see." "It says 'November 5th.'" "Oh, November 5th." "But that's ..." "Aaaah!" "Oh, oh it's you Nick!" "Hi, babes!" "Hello Nick." "How are you?" "Gr-eat." "Nice muscles." "Here's your milk." "Our milk." "You mean our milk you borrowed three weeks ago." "Oh, thanks Nick." "[Speaking in a mock Italian accent] I forget nothing!" "Would you like a drink, Nick?" "Would you like a drink, Nick?" "Uhh." "I said, would you like a drink, Nick?" "Oh!" "Sorry." "No thanks." "Oh, erm, Bridget's friend is coming." "Oh yeah." "Aha." "From Argentina." "Wow!" "From Argentina!" "What's she like?" "She is a he!" "Huh?" "Not a girl, a boy." "Oh." "Tough guy, ay!" "Why don't I show you how to do it properly!" "Nick, I've told you before." "Nobody uses my bike, nobody, is that clear?" "Why not?" "Why not!" "If you touch my bike again, you are out!" "O-U-T, out!" "Clear!" "What?" "!" "I said ..." "Hello." "Hello." "I am called Argentina." "I am from Hector." "You mean 'I am called Hector.'" "You are called Hector?" "Oh, no, no, no, I am called Annie." "I am called Annie." "No!" "She means 'I am called Hector," "I am from Argentina.'" "You are from Argentina!" "Oh, come in!" "My cars." "You play with cars?" "!" "Yes, you play, no?" "I play with cars." "He plays with cars!" "I read." "I love the library." "Fascinating!" "We go to the library, too." "Don't we, Bridget!" "Yes, it's great!" "Good." "I live here." "You live in a museum?" "Full of old things?" "Old things?" "Yes, I have lots of old things." "I live in a museum." "OK." "I live in a museum." "Well, thank you Hector and now we'll show you the flat." "This is the bedroom." "Thank you." "Who-hey!" "Where do you sleep?" "[Erm] no you don't understand, we only have one bedroom." "One?" "I have twenty." "Twenty?" "Yes, he lives in a museum, with twenty bedrooms." "Oh!" "Ha-ha-ha, very funny, ha, twenty bedrooms!" "Well, you can sleep here." "Oh, thank you." "Oh, no, no, no, Hector!" "It's a bed." "A bed?" "Ah, oh ..." "Here's a cushion." "Oh, thank you." "Oh, this of course is the TV." "But just relax, I must go to the bathroom." "Psst!" "Annie!" "Bathroom!" "Now!" "Oh my goodness, what are we going to do?" "He plays with toy cars!" "He is not a sexy Argentinian." "But he is sweet." "And he is polite." "But those clothes!" "Oh, he is so old-fashioned." "Mm, he must go." "Room service." "Hello." "Who are you?" "Oh, you who are quick, good" "Ay?" "My luggage is downstairs." "What?" "Bring it up, please." "What are you doing?" "I pulled, you come, you are the butler." "The butler?" "!" "I am Nick, I live next door." "Oh, I, ..." "I am Hector." "Oh, Hector, from Argentina." "Yes, from Argentina!" "Where are the girls?" "The girls?" "Yeah, Bridget and Annie." "Oh they live here." "Yeah, I know." "Where's Bridget?" "Does she know you are here?" "Bridget, she gave me this." "Oh." "Hello Nick!" "Oh, this is Hector from Argentina." "Yeah, I know." "Isn't he wonderful!" "Wonderful." "Are you hungry?" "Uh?" "We'll buy your lunch." "What would you like to eat?" "Fish and chips?" "Oh, fish and ships!" "[Erm] Nick, Hector, make friends." "Nick, teach Hector some English." "Yeah, OK, I'll teach Hector some English." "OK, this is the oven." "This is the ov-en." "Annie's dog sleeps in the oven." "Annie's dog sleeps in the oven." "So you say "Annie!" "The dog is in the oven!"" "Annie, the dog is in the oven!" "Gr-eat!" "Now, Bridget." "Oh, oh dear." "Well Bridget likes strong men, especially strong legs." "Well I am strong." "Yeah?" "Can you cycle fifty kilometres?" "Yes." "No way!" "Yes." "Well go on then, show me." "Yes, look!" "Adios, Amigo!" "Ah, Bridget, Annie, lunch!" "Fish and chips!" "Yes, lunch, Hector." "Look Bridget, fifty kilometres." "Oh, Annie, the dog is in the ov-en." "What?" "Oh!" "Hi, everything OK?" "Gr-eat!" "Pouf!" "I am, how do you say?" "Dead!" "Hot." "Hot.Yeah," "I am hot, I need a .." "... Shower." "Yeah, I need a shower." "Be my guest!" "Oh, thank you." "Right, that's it!" "He must go!" "Why?" "He is so nice." "He used my bike!" "Oh!" "Yeah, and he said that the dog was in the oven!" "What a horrible joke!" "Where is Charley?" "Charley!" "What a bad, bad boy." "He must go!" "Can he stay with you, Nick?" "Ah-ah, sorry ladies." "Oh please Nick, you have a spare room." "No way, not my problem." "He must go now!" "But he's in the shower." "I don't care!" "Hector, please come out, we want to talk to you." "I like fish and ships, I ..." "Hector, please come out, we want to talk to you." "OK, one moment please!" "I like fish and chips!" "Yes, you want me." "We think we  We, we, we have a problem." "It's like this." "Go on then, tell him." "Yes, Bridget" "Hector, the thing is ..." "Stay there, I'll talk to him." "Hector, can I have a word please?" "Oh ..." "Ricky Martin!" "Hector, is this you?" "Yes, and my parents." "The Romero family." "One of the richest families in Argentina." "Who are these?" "My   Servants." "Yeah, my servants." "Your cars?" "Yeah, my cars." "Hector, you are rich!" "Why stay here?" "I want friends, good friends" "People like you for your money?" "That's awful!" "[Erm] listen, keep it a secret." "Sshh." "OK!" "Perhaps he could stay here." "Yes – poor boy" "Shut up, Nick." "Hector will stay with us, won't you, Hector." "Hector, come and – sit down." "Hector please, call me Gigi!" "Oh, Charley, there you are." "Oh Annie, the dog is in the ov-en." "The oven?" "Yes, Nick is a good English teacher." "Yes, a very good English teacher!" "I'd love to see your photos again." "Oh, me too!" "Oh, your sweet toy cars!" "They are not toys!" "Today Hector arrives and it's Bonfire Night." "Let's party!" "What sort of music do you like?" "Music?" "Yeah, music, you know, soul, funk, dance." "Watch me, like this." "Interesting." "I dance – like this. [Oh!" "]." "I'll get it, I'll get it." "Hello." "Oh, yeah, that's great, sure, come up." "It's the landlady!" "The tarantula!" "Quick, hide, Hector." "I'm off, I owe two week's rent!" "Aaah!" "Next time in EXTRA – the flat mates go shopping for Hector." "Hector goes shopping for the girls." "But what happens when Hector goes shopping for himself?" "EXTRA – don't miss it!"