"♪ beautiful dreamer ♪" "♪ it's a great big world ♪" "♪ don't be discouraged ♪" "♪ by what you've been told ♪" "( camera flashes )" "♪ it's a sunny day ♪" "♪ in califor-ni-ay ♪" "♪ when you're rollin' the dice ♪" "♪ you're winnin' the game ♪" "( camera flashes )" "♪ the road to riches ♪" "♪ can pave over the heart ♪" "♪ you're on a lucky streak ♪" "♪ so roll it again... ♪" "Woman on p.A.:" "A million people visit los angeles every summer." "Our blue skies..." "Sea and attractions" "Often keep them here for good." "More tourists become residents here than any other city in the nation." "We are now approaching the los angeles broadcasting system studios." "Labs is one of the oldest studios in los angeles." "Those of you visiting "easy money"" "Will be met at the gate." "♪ but pray for the fools... ♪" "( camera snaps )" "( cheering, show theme music plays )" "( laughing )" "Host:" "And we're on the clock starting..." "Now." "It sweats, it competes." "A race horse." "It keeps score." "Madonna?" " It drinks evian." " A fashion model." " ( buzzer sounds ) - ( audience groans )" "Ooh, you are out of time." "Too bad, joanne." "The correct answer was "athlete."" "( applause )" "Mary, you were our champion..." "It's been fun." "We hate to see you go." "But now it's time to bring out our contender" " For that..." " Audience: $50,000 question!" "Let's give a big round of applause" "For our celebrity guest, joanne smart," "( applause )" "And our contender, jack waters." "( applause )" "Are you ready for your three questions?" "We are." "We are ready, john." "Host:" "At the bell, you will have 25 seconds" "To answer these three questions." " Jack, do you have the questions?" " Yes." "This is for $50,000." "Yes." "And we are on the clock starting..." "Now." " Thrust." " Air." " Circulated." " "jet propulsion."" "( applause )" "New question, 18 seconds to go." ""summa theologica," "summa contra gentiles."" " "best known works of thomas aquinas." - whoa!" "Wow, that was great." "And now for the final..." "All:" "$50,000 question." " 10 seconds to go, ready, jack?" " Yeah." "One word clues to the questions." "Go!" " Birds." " Things with feathers." " Airplanes." " Things that are aerodynamically sound." " Kites." " Airborne inventions." " Fastballs." " Babe ruth?" " Bats." " Baseball players with names of birds." "No, no, no..." "Vampire bats and fruit-fly" "One-word clues, jack." "Joanne:" "Things with radar." "Two seconds." " Birds." "Birds." " Alfred hitchcock." " ( buzzer sounds ) - oh, there's the bell." "That means we are out of time." "Sorry, jack." "Alfred fucking-hitchcock?" " Jack?" " How the fuck could you get" ""saint thomas aquinas" and not get "things that fly"?" "What the hell's the matter with you?" " You just cost me 50-fucking-thousand-- - oh, my god." ""things that fly."" "$50,000!" "She cost me $50,000!" "You!" "You're in this!" "You are too!" "Announcer:" "We'll see you next time on "easy money."" " Jack:" "It's a phony quiz show-- - please disregard the activity." " You tell 'em." " Exit to your left and have a nice day." "...Get your fucking hands off me" " Announcer:" "Thank you for playing "easy money"..." " Wait, I get prizes" "America's favorite game show." "Exit to your left and have a nice day." " C'mon!" " Thank you for playing "easy money,"" "America's favorite game show." " Exit to your left and have-- - and you too, fuck you." "Once again, thank you for joining us today on "easy money."" "Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain." "Hey, hey!" "What are you doing to that car?" "What's it look like?" "You're the guy on "easy money." I just saw you." "Really?" "What are you, a cop?" "If you're not a cop, keep moving." "Just relax." ""relax"?" "You ever had 50 grand" "Snatched out of your hands?" "I guess that is kind of a lot of money." "You can say it is a lot of money." "Money is like blood and blood was spilled in there today." "You got it?" "Yes, sir." "Bitch, there you go." " Mr. Waters." " What?" "First of all, my name is henry fields." "I'm from texas." "I'm jack." "I'm out of here." "Mr. Waters?" "I'm really not familiar with the area and I was..." "I was told this is a nice place to stay." "Could you point me in the right direction?" "Uh, henry..." "That's a dump, you don't want to stay there." "Why don't I..." "Take you someplace?" "We'll have a drink." "I'll fill you in on our fair city." " We'll go have a drink?" " Yeah." " Us?" " All of us." " Hop in." " All right." "Mc:" "This hour only" "$5 off all table dances." "$5 off." "( applause )" "Jack:" "Pay attention." "Heads." "It's really..." "It's unbelievable." "I'm amazed." "You want to examine the coin again?" "What are you doing?" "There's a girl coming this way." "That's claudette." "Nice smile, huh, henry?" "Yeah, very nice smile." "Hey jack, another scotch?" "Yeah." "Claudette:" "How about you, cowboy?" "I just got to buy you a drink." "Henry:" "Isn't that nice?" " I'll have a whiskey then." " Whiskey?" "That's just perfect." "Never bought me a drink." "You just don't look like him, jack." "So, cowboy," "How'd you like a picture of a pretty girl?" "Where is she anyway?" "Moira's up next." "I see you got your contestant suit on." "You win anything?" "You want to get those drinks?" "We're kind of busy here." "Yeah, I can see you're working." "Picture's 10 bucks if you like it." "All right, I got about half the money on the table." "What do you say?" "Double or nothing," "Everything on the table-- one flip of the coin." "I think my luck is about to change." "What do you think?" "All right double or nothing." "One flip." "Heads." " It's amazing." " It's amazing." "It must be my lucky night." "It's been-- like that all night." "Mc:" "Coming up right now, we've got a special treat." "Trained in the mystic arts of the far east." "What's the matter?" "Aren't you going to watch?" "I promise you, you've never seen" " Do you mind?" " A kimono move like this." "She's a friend of mine." "( asian-style dance music starts )" "Henry:" "Who is she?" "That" "Is moira." "She's absolutely beautiful." "( music ends )" "Mc:" "Yes, let's hear it for her!" "( applause )" "Show your appreciation for your favorite ladies." "These girls are working their way through college." "It's like they've never seen a woman before." "All right, I'm getting ready to leave." "You want me to drop you someplace?" "Now, a special salute to the armed forces." "Henry?" "Do I hold in my arms the nouveau riche?" "Hello, moira." "Oh, that's n a "jackpot" face." "I had it right here." "One question away" ""things that fly."" "It was just like that money." "Swoosh" "It just flew right away, didn't it, jack?" "Jack, who's your friend?" "Oh, I'm henry fields of texas." "Moira kennedy of everywhere." "You were" "You were really good up there." "I mean, that getup is so-- feminine." "Why yes, it is." "Where'd we find him?" "He found me." " Where are you staying?" " I was going to stay downtown," "But jack said it was no good, so" "I don't really know." "Really?" "I think there might be a space" "Where jack and I live." "You and jack-- you live together?" "Separate floors." "Oh, well, isn't that good news?" "Yeah, that's fine, but this boat is leaving." " You're leaving?" " Come on, henry." "We'll see whether there's room for you at the "arms."" "Well, that'd be right kind of you." "It was a pleasure meeting you, miss..." "Kennedy." "Pleasure's all yours." " Say good night, henry." " Good night, henry." " Henry?" " All right." "Good night." "Mc:" "Let's hear it for sherry" "On the side stage." "Who is that boy?" "Henry fields." "Well, isn't that nice?" "Taj mahal." "There ought to be a spot in there for ya, henry." "C'mon in." "Sit tight a minute." "Let me make a phone call." "All right." "( music plays softly )" "You a gambling man, jack?" "'fraid so." "I don't care much for gambling, myself." "What about that coin toss?" "Couldn't stop, could you?" "Figured any minute, something would change, get better." "That is hope, henry" "The strongest of all human emotions and not to be ignored." "You like all your riches lumped together, huh?" "Looking for lumps, henry?" "Become a gambler." "Yeah, mrs." "Green?" "Jack waters" " You know what time it is?" " Yeah I know it's late, but" "Listen, I have an old friend from texas." "Yeah, he needs a place to stay." "We won't accept anyone unless they have money in advance." "I have something to discuss with you." "Those tickets you gave me for mexico didn't work, jack." "I went down and they just didn't work." "I'll send him down." "You're in." "That's real kind of you, jack." "What comes around goes around." "That's the way the odds work." "I do something nice for somebody," "Somebody does something nice for me." "Well then, I owe you one." "I do believe in karma." "Me, too." "Good night." "Oh, good night." "Mrs. Green." "101." "Don't get scared if she's wearing a mud pack." "Or if she isn't." "Radio:" "A city of commerce man was awarded $1 million" "In a case against salk's chocolates." "John berry of commerce sued salk's candies, inc." "After a debilitating reaction to the insecticide-laden" "Mummified remains of common cockroaches" "Which contaminated the candy bar." "Million dollar settlement was paid" "As berry was paralyzed from the waist down." "Lucky son of a bitch." "( knocking )" "Jack:" "Henry." "( knocking ) henry!" "Who is it?" "Jack waters." "Open up." "It's open." "Come on in." "Wake up, henry." "Get dressed, I'm taking you to the studio." " The studio?" " You ever been on a game show, henry?" " Heck, no." " I've been on all of 'em." "You can make big bucks." "I have." "I'm going to "roads to riches" right now," "Are you in or out?" "I can be on a game show just like that?" "I'll show you how it's done, henry." "All right." "Just give me two minutes." "Let's do it to it." "She gave you the bay suite, huh?" " Yeah..." " Get dressed." "We'll stop on the way." "I'll let you buy me breakfast." "Take me to "roads to riches."" "When you first get into the selection room," "Don't smile." "It makes you look eager." "After a long day of eager people," "It makes them sick." "So, ignore them." "That always gets somebody's attention." "Are you listening to me?" "No, I'm sorry." "I was thinking about moira." "I'm not going to waste my time on you." "Forget it." "Come on, jack." "Man to man." ""man to man"?" "Yeah, what's her story?" "They've been coming here for centuries." "Why moira?" "Do you believe in fate?" "Depends on how it goes." "Come on, jack." "Just tell me about her." "Come on, where'd you meet her?" "When I first met moira she was sitting at a bus stop" "In front of county general hospital." "She had sold herself" "On some kind of phony modeling gig in japan." "And..." "You know what happens to girls that model in japan?" "Ah, well" "It took her a long time to get home." "Ever since I've been..." "Looking after her." "That's it." "What was she doing in front of that hospital?" "Let's say moira has a flair for the dramatic." "Let's say you get the check." "We're late." "Miss, can we get the check, please?" "Your breakfast is on me." "Isn't that nice?" "Am I missing something?" "Woman:" "I want to thank all of you" "For auditioning for "roads to riches,"" "The only live game show in america." "We have made our contestant selections," "So when your name is called" "Please exit to the right." "Jan smith," "Lisa kane, willie jones," "John ingram, henry fields" "Oh, that's me!" "That's me!" "That's me, I'm henry fields!" "Thank you, mr." "Fields, please step up to the front." "Can you imagine that?" "( laughs )" "Good for you, henry." "Wish me luck, all right?" "Thank you, thank you." "All right!" "All right!" "Woman:" "Thank you, everybody." "You may audition again in three months." "Hmm." "( knocking )" "Henry:" "Hey, jack!" "( knocking ) jack, you in there, buddy?" "( knocking ) hey, jack, you in there?" " I'm working, henry!" " Aren't you gonna ask me how it went?" " How'd it went?" " It wasn't bad." "They were gonna ask me to come back." "It could have been six months, only a contestant for today didn't show up." "They put me on the show on the spot-- live tv!" "Did you win anything?" "Just $1,000." "Come on in." "Today must be my lucky day, jack." "And tomorrow I'm the new champion." "The studio people must have liked me" " Because they kept asking me about my life." " It's a game show." "The host is supposed to ask questions." "I'm in the middle of something." "What do you want?" "Oh..." "Here you go." " What is this?" "The way I see it, I never would have" "Gotten on that game show if it weren't for you." "It seems fair we split the money down the middle." "People don't give each other money, henry." "You don't walk up to somebody and say," ""howdy, I owe you money," when you don't." "Even if you did get on the show and I didn't." " But jack-- - so take it back." "Why don't you think of it as a commission" "Like one of them hollywood agents gets." "That seems right to me." "You mean, if I didn't share the experience" "None of this would have happened?" " Right as rain." " Right as rain." "See you tomorrow." "What if I don't win anything tomorrow?" "Impossible, henry fields." "You are a winner." "I hate guys like you." "Goodbye." "Goodbye." "Maybe we could have a drink." "My treat, of course." "Some other time, henry." "All right." "But you'll join me for the show tomorrow?" " I wouldn't miss it." " Good night, jack." "Thanks, buddy." " ( knocking ) - what now?" "Hello." "Oh, where's henry?" "Not here, is he?" "I'm sorry." " How are you?" " Busy." "Jack..." " I need a favor." " ( groans )" "If it involves a president's picture" "Don't ask." "It's only for a week." "I'm just a little short on rent." "One week?" "Two at the most." "Is 50 okay?" "Ooh, where'd you get that?" " Forget it." " No, I'm interested." "Henry hit a hot streak with my dime." " He did?" " My shot at "roads to riches,"" "Bam, just like that." " That made you happy." " He goes back tomorrow." "Probably win a million." "See what happens when you got my luck?" "Do somebody a favor, they wind up with the pot." "He figured I was due half the money." " A million?" " Keep your shirt on." "You don't need half that to live forever in mexico." "So how much did henry win?" " A thousand." " And he gave you half?" "Mmmm..." "I know that look." "You're thinking you could've done better." "Well, half a grand ain't gonna get you to mexico." "Yeah, but you're a big picture person." "Your head's ticking." "I can hear it from here." "You ought to know what that sounds like." "Hmm." "So henry goes back on the show tomorrow?" "Leaving?" "Thanks for the 50." "That's a franklin in your kimono" "And..." "Don't try to horn in on this one." "Henry is mine." "What makes you think I'm going to see henry?" "I don't know." "What made the soothsayer so insightful of caesar?" "What?" "Forget it." "Jack." "Henry is all yours." " Good girl." " I am a good girl." "And this good girl is so..." "Sleepy, I'm barely gonna make it downstairs." "( yawns )" "Thank you." "( knocking )" "Remember me?" "( moira laughing )" "Moira:" "Tell me about this game show." "Henry:" "Nah, it'll be over before it's started." "Moira:" "Yeah, jack thinks you're pretty lucky." "Henry:" "Jack's the kind of guy who believes in luck." "Moira:" "Yeah, that and head-on collisions." "Henry:" "We all got to run into something." "Shoot." "So, what are you good at, henry?" "Well I was a carpenter." "Some great men in history started out as carpenters." "I built a good house, once." "Yeah?" "Where is it?" "It's still there." " ( laughs ) - weren't you gonna drink a real drink?" "No, it destroys me." "One sip and I'd be likely to fall over myself." "Your shot." "Well, I guess I better take it." "What do you think?" "Double or nothing?" "All right." "( laughs )" "Huh." "Where'd you learn how to shoot like that?" "Jack:" "Reform schools." "Wasn't it?" "Hey, look who the cat dragged in." "What are you doing here?" "I was just wondering the same thing myself." "She's a pretty mean shot, jack." "Sure is." "Henry:" "How about a drink there, buddy?" " Scotch." " All right." "What are you doing?" " Oh, relax." " "oh, relax"?" "He's a yours." "As if opportunity is the only reason" "I'd want to be with him." "( laughs )" " What?" " You protecting henry." "Don't do that." "I hate it when you do that." "No, jack, you don't hate anything that I do." "Here you go, buddy." "Look at all these faraway places." "I come all the way to l.A." "I think I'm traveling." "What about y'all?" "You ever been anywhere special?" "Nope." "Moira's been to japan." "Henry:" "I hear that's not such a great place." "Every place is the same." "Wasn't that where you got that pretty red robe?" "Yeah." "That is a geisha's robe." "Some of those girls are thousands of years old." "Nobody laughs at them." "You put one of those robes on," "And no one can hurt you." "But enough about me." "Moira." "Henry, you remember "gabby grazer"?" "Yeah, the fat kid on the "miki myers show."" "Forget it, henry." "Guess who played that fat kid?" "You were "gabby grazer"?" " In the flesh." " Well, what happened?" "It got canceled." "Oh." "Thank you, very much." "No, thank you." "How about we play a little bit of pool?" "We've got three, how about a little "cutthroat"?" " Care to wager?" " You're on." "All right." "I'll take six through 10." "I'll take the high balls." "Now, let's get a little bit serious here." "Announcer:" "Five, four," "Three, two..." "We're back!" "Okay, folks, simmer down." "( applause )" "They still got the "applause" sign up." "What the hell's the matter with these guys?" "Host:" "You folks really want this guy to win." "Okay, all right, welcome back." "You ready?" "What is the chief crop" "Of machu picchu?" "( clock rhythm music plays )" "( laughs )" "Come on, henry." "You've got to get this." "I don't know, I" "Henry:" "Machu picchu?" "All right-- er..." "Host:" "We're waiting." "What's your answer?" " Henry:" "Machu picchu?" " Host:" "Yeah." " Oh, he's losing." " Jack." "Don't forget the parting gifts, henry." "Host:" "Henry, what's your answer?" "Cocoa?" " ( horn honks ) - oh, henry." "I'm afraid that's your bust." " Bankrupt." " ( crowd boos )" "Hey, don't get mad at me." "Thanks for playing." "That's all we have time for." " We'll see you all tomorrow - girl:" "I love you, henry!" "On america's only live game show," ""roads to riches."" " See you then." " ( applause )" "Welcome back to the mundane, henry fields." "I have to go." "You want to buy our loser a drink?" "You're happy he lost?" "A little." "Go on, maybe you can cheer him up." "You're jealous of henry." "Jealous?" "Really?" "What?" "Of what?" "Come on, please." " Moira:" "Jealous." " Jack:" "Not me." "I have to go, jack." "Will you please tell him that I said goodbye?" "I'd be delighted." "Moira:" "Bye, jack." "See you." "Host:" "And we need you to go home now." "Could you help me out here, jim?" "Announcer:" "Thanks for joining us today today on "roads to riches."" "America's only live game show." "Host:" "Thanks for playing, henry." "Man #1:" "Get me business affairs." "Don't let henry fields out of the building." "They love this kid." "Man #2:" "Why am I in your office, dan?" "Henry fields, jim." "Henry fields." "That kid's gonna be a star." "Why not here on "roads to riches"?" "I'm telling you." "We put that kid in the spotlight," "He's gonna hit." "You want good, all-american clean-cut family values?" "I'm telling you," "We have found our new host." "I'll bet my career on it." "Okay, dan." "That's why I hired you." "Do it." "Whatever you need." "The network is a heartbeat away from canning us." "So if it screws us up, it was all your idea." "Henry, "roads to riches" may soon be" "America's favorite game show." "They loved us today, henry." "And why?" "Because the people loved you." "That's right, henry." "They loved you." "Come on up here." "Come on!" "Don't be shy, come on." "That's it." "That's right." "Oh, you look great." "Come on over here." "I want you to stand right here." "Right there." "Now, you look great, henry." "Now, henry, I'm gonna ask you a question." "Just a simple question." "But the answer you choose" "Could have a great impact on your life." "But I don't want you to think about that." "Say the first thing that comes into your mind." "You ready, henry?" "Yes, sir." "All right." "Henry," "How would you..." "Like to be..." "The new host for "roads to riches"?" "( show theme music plays )" "Are you interested in prosperity, henry?" "You want me..." "To be the new host of "roads to riches"?" "Yes, yes!" "Yes, yes!" "All you have to do is sign on the dotted line." "Right re, henry." "Destiny, henry." "It's calling." "Opportunity is knocking." "No, no, no" "Opportunity is pounding on you door!" "Are you ready to open that door, henry?" "You're gonna have to slow down, mr." "Smith." "Dan, call me dan." "Henry, this could all be in motion by tomorrow." "All you have to do is sign right here." "I don't like to rush a thing, if that's all right, mr." "Smith." "Right." "Right!" "Take your time." "Tomorrow's fine." "But you look great up there, henry." "( laughs ) you really look great!" "I've never seen anything like it." "I'm having a party at my house tonight." "They're probably firing up the barbecue as we speak." " Hey, you like barbecued steaks, henry?" " Yeah." "Cold beer?" "Corn on the cob?" "Sure." "Chit'lins?" " You're kidding." " Why don't you come?" "Oh, come on." "You're new in town." "Lots of pretty girls there." "( both laugh )" " Come on, henry, what do you say?" " Henry!" "Hey, jack, buddy, I thought you up and left me." "Boy, did you walk into an interesting conversation." "Really?" "Jack waters." "Ah, what's this I hear about a party?" "( country music playing )" "♪ I can give up smoking ♪" "♪ anytime you say ♪" "♪ stopped my late night drinking... ♪" "Dan:" "Oh, yeah, you got that right." "Reality tv, that's the wave of the future." "No, that's great." "Contract's in, great." "You get a bad apple once in a while..." "But it's cheap." "I'm telling you, it's so cheap." "No, you find the right guy..." "Excuse me." "Henry!" "Henry!" "Oh, look at that face." "This is some place here." "Smells like back home." "♪ left home for nashville, ♪" "♪ from a town called nowhere ♪" "♪ walking down the highway ♪" "♪ with my thumb in the air... ♪" "Dan:" "Excuse us, girls." "♪ sing and play my guitar... ♪" "Is that your best scotch?" "♪ with some help from the lord above, I'll be a country star. ♪" "Let me ask you something." "When did you know that you wergonna work this party?" "About two hours ago." "You know-- last-minute thing." "Yeah, I did know." "♪ I wanna hear that fiddle ♪" "♪ and the sound of the steel guitar... ♪" "Hey, dan!" "Great party." "Thanks for the invite." "Anytime." "And it's an interesting theme, too." "Something you tossed together or what?" "Henry here tells me the two of you met at a game show." "That's right." "I got henry his first job in showbiz." " First job?" " Ain't that right, henry?" "First dime you made in show business you got because of me." " That's the truth." " I want to talk to you." " You know, henry." "There's someone I want-- - hey, dannah!" "Holy moly, henry!" "Do you know the odds against something like this happening?" "Who were you in your last life?" "Martin luther king or somebody?" "I'm not even sure I understand what's happening." "What is this "it" dan smith keeps talking about?" "It, henry?" "It, henry, is this." "You got it, and I'm concerned." "Concerned?" "You got tricky people in this business." "Well, dan smith, he seems all right." "Forget this guy." "He's like a fox in a henhouse." "You can't trust anybody when money is involved." "Don't forget that, henry." "Jack, I trust you, you know that, right?" "In that case, I better help you with this." "And believe you me, I know how this thing can turn." "You would do that, for me?" "That's what friends are for, henry." "All:" "♪ kum-ba-yah, my lord ♪" "♪ kum-ba-yah ♪" "♪ kum-ba-yah, my lord ♪" "♪ kum-ba-yah ♪" "♪ oh, lord, ♪" "♪ kum-ba-yah ♪" "♪ kum-ba-yah, my lord... ♪" "( humming )" "You may be saved." "This could change everything." "Henry fields may save us all." "Gabby grazer, you smart guy." "We are back in business." "How'd henry hold up after his big loss?" "It's 3:00 in the morning." "He's so cute about all of it." "Moira, are you" "It's bad this time." "Not even the light helped." "That's all right, let's get your pillows." "My nightmares never follow me up here." "Are you the least bit curious about what happened today?" "Henry lost big." "Poor thing." "He was so excited about all of it." "He'll be back in texas before he knows what hit him." "I'm going to give you a lesson in faith." "Patience-- something you always come up short on." "Go on." "Would you like to wager" "On who the next host of "road to riches" is?" "I will bet you $100" "That you cannot guess who the next host" "Of that show is." "Why in the hell would you care who the host" "$100 I can't guess--?" "Forget it, I already gave you too much." " Henry?" " This guy is capable of anything." "He's the best thing that ever happened to me." "Our henry's going to be the host of a game show?" "I am gonna be rich." " You, rich?" " You are looking at" "Henry fields' personal manager." "No, you didn't." "I know something about this business." "I'm going to make a deal I can retire on." "I'm going to give these guys a taste of the" "That they gave me." "This is uncharted territory." "You better be careful." "I made an option deal," "But I know he's gonna hit." "And then I will take him to the cleaners." "They called him, "mr." "Clean."" "Some christian tv took over the show," "They think he spells american family values." "He is nice, isn't he?" "He's too nice." "He's the kind of guy that winds up on the news." "He's probably got more skeletons than arlington." "Oh, gosh, don't be so cynical." "Sure, you let your guard down..." "And you get what you deserve." "He is perfect, isn't he?" "I" "Am the only perfect individual" "In this parallel universe." "Perfectly strange." "( laughs )" "Sweet dreams, sweet moira." "Jack...?" "Good night, moira." "Dan:" "Come on in." "Have a seat." "Be comfortable." "I got places to be, dan." "Well, you just might want to take a look" "At this." "And..." "What is this?" "A lot of money." "That's a lot of money." "It's got my name on it." "Why?" "That gives him to us for five years" "At his current price." "Making me out to be a genius." "And for your trouble, this generous bonus." "You can take that to the bank, jack." "Who knows how long henry will keep you around?" "Hmmm?" "Something..." "Nothing." "It's a sure bet, jack." "All I got to do is screw henry?" "Well, yes." "$20,000?" "Pretty simple math, jack." "You hesitate, you lose." "You know what losing feels like." "You think that I'm gonna let you buy me off with this?" "What, do you think I'm a beginner?" "You think I'm stupid?" "Let's say I say "fuck you."" "You have to be a lot sweeter than this." "What?" " What are you, crazy?" " Out of my fucking mind!" "I know who you are, jack waters!" "You're a loser!" "And I'm gonna crush you like a grape!" "Your art stinks!" "What are you looking at?" "( tv theme music plays within )" "Moira?" "Henry:" "Jack?" "Jack." "Jack." "Hey." ""prince valiant."" "Where's "gypsy rose lee"?" "Actually, that's what I want to talk to you about." "I don't want to talk about her anymore." "Whoa, easy, buddy, come on." "You know why the public likes" "Your white, clean persona?" "Because they can't wait to get it dirty." "All right, jack." "Let's just get upstairs." "Come on." "Come on, I'll help you." "If I rubbed you, would you squeak?" "No, wait, what's so great about you?" "Really." "Do you think I need you?" "I got something" "So much better than the henry fields phenomenon." "Would you like to see it?" "I will only ask once." "It's..." "A lifetime of plotting," "And scheming" "Rolled into one" "Foolproof," "No-horseshit great-fucking-idea." "All right, let's just get you upstairs." "Come on." "Close your eyes," "And you'll benefit from my council." "What the hell is that?" "Oh, you opened your eyes." "You took away my moment." "Jack, what is that?" "It's a million dollars." "That's a million dollars?" "Ask me how it works." "What's in that can, jack?" "( squeaking )" "There's a rat in the can." "I got him little so he could get in the can." "Why would you want to do that?" "You feed him in the can." "You raise him in the can." "When he gets big enough you put soda in the can." "And then you take a sip and then..." "Oh, my god!" "There's a dead rat in my can!" "I'll sue them for two and a half" "I'll settle for a million." "Happens every day." "How long has he been in that can?" "Hmmm." "Since you came." "What does moira think about all this?" "Moira is not to know." "It is a surprise." "Going to surprise moira." "What do you think?" "I think it's weird, jack." "It just isn't right." "Oh-hh," "What do you know about what's right?" "You'd probably walk out of here and get hit by a brinks truck." "Me, I am going to drown the rat" "And take moira to mexico." "( laughs ) you don't know about mexico, do you?" "No, she doesn't tell you everything, does she?" "What?" "Genius, and it's too big for you to grasp." "Oh, you think because I don't like it that makes me an idiot?" " Something like that." " You think you know me." "You don't know anything about me." "You know what the difference is between me and you?" "You move sideways while I move forward." "How are you going to take on a corporation for a million dollars?" "You're small-time." "That rat is going to go gray with the rest of us" "By the time that you build up the nerve." "Get out." "Get out." " I don't need you." " You do need me, jack," "Just like any one of your other sure things." "Need you?" "I was fine before I met you." "My rat in a can is a million times better than you." "What, you can't hear the truth?" "Watch!" "This is going to make me millions!" "Where are you going?" "Mc:" "You gentlemen are in luck this evening." "We've got a manager's special going on right now." " Don't go up there." " What are you doing here?" "Please, don't go up there." "What is this?" "Moira, please." "I'm in love with you." "Trust me." " I don't know you, henry." " How can you not trust me?" "It doesn't work that way." "Moira, I love you." "And I want to change your life." "By this time, tomorrow" "I promise your life will never be the same." "♪ as you're sleeping ♪" "♪ I can't believe them ♪" "♪ my sweet thing ♪" "♪ trouble deep within... ♪" "Moira?" "♪ to be absolved, amen... ♪" "Moira?" "♪ ..." "That false smile down into a frown ♪" "♪ no one here ♪" "♪ by yourself ♪" "♪ ..." "You could find your health. ♪" "( faintly ) no..." "No." "No." "( sobbing )" "No!" "No!" "( gasps )" "Are you okay?" "Did you have a bad dream?" "Yeah." "It's okay." "It's okay." "I'm dancing in this ballet..." "Like when I was a kid." "Suddenly the music goes funny..." "And I can't keep my step." "And then this person in the back of the house" "Starts laughing." "It just-- and then it spreads through the house." "Like cancer, everyone" "Laughing." "It just rises like this tidal wave..." "And strips my skin off." "And I'm up there naked." "Boy, you sure have some funny dreams." "They're not so funny to me." "What does that mean?" ""no surrender."" "Okay." "I'm up." ""didn't want to wake you." "I'm at the studio." "I'm putting moira on the show."" "Moira on the show?" "Producer:" "Beautiful." "Now all you have to do is take her hand." "Escort her down." "Take it a little slow so you don't trip." "Okay, very good." "Perfect." "Great." "You look beautiful, darling." "Just beautiful." "Producer:" "She's a natural." "She's a pro." "Sure as shooting, huh?" "Just look at you." "Born natural." "I can tell the camera's gonna love you." "Producer:" "Great, why don't we take five?" "Dan:" "Good idea." "Henry, why don't you come with me?" "We'll look at the wardrobe for our new star." " Henry:" "You're all right?" " Moira:" "I'll be fine." "Henry, wait until you see the suit we got for you." "It is unbelievable!" "Pure silk." "All right?" "We'll discuss all this later, all right?" "Dan:" "Henry!" "Henry!" "( knocking )" "Who is it?" "The new hostess of "roads to riches."" " Oh." " Did you get the note?" "I was there." "Are you mad?" "At what?" "That you're on the show?" "I'm delighted." "Now I get two commissions." "Can you believe this?" "It's like magic." "It's like a dream." "It could change everything." "I could do something with all this." "I could save some money." "Invest." "How'd he do it?" "He asked." "See?" "That henry" "Always going forward, never sideways." "Things have happened so fast." "I thought, "here's this guy." "I'll hang out with him, spend a little money,"" "But now this." "Whew." "Jack, I walked on that set" "And everyone loved me." "It's your big chance." " Please don't say that." " What?" "Now that you're getting" "A shot of a lifetime, don't tell me you're getting scared?" "No, I'm not afraid of anything." "That's right." "That's the attitude." " Yeah." " Yeah." "I am scared, jack." "I'm scared I'll blow it." "I'm scared I'll want it so badly," "That when I blow it, I'm going to fall to pieces" "And I won't be able to pick them up again." "No..." "You're a warrior." "You're not going to fall to pieces." "You're not going to blow it." "You can handle this." "An idiot can handle this." "You get dealt four aces, you fly without a net." "Think of mexico." "What, you're gonna make me cry." "What is this?" "This is the best thing that's ever happened to me." "So why this unhappy face?" "( laughs ) I don't know." "This is what you've been waiting for." "This is what you wanted your whole life." "No more smoky clubs, no more scams," "No more-- you know." "No more you?" "I'm not going anywhere." "Things have gotten so complicated." "My head's so full of stuff, I just" " I can't think." " What's complicated?" "You show up, walk out on stage," "You go home, you get paid." "Am I dreaming?" "We can't both be." "You are going to be the best hostess they ever saw." " You think so?" " Yeah." "Should I change something?" "Let me take a look here." "I wouldn't change a thing." "You lie." " No." " No?" "Oh, so sorry." "No, it's okay." "It's not all right." "No, it's not all right." " I shouldn't have done that." " Jack, it's fine." "Can I see you on the set and talk abo it later?" " No, we should" " I don't want to talk about anything." "It's okay." "Relax." " It's fine." " It's not." "Excuse me." "See you tomorrow." "Damn it." "Moira!" "Have good luck tomorrow..." "You hear?" "Thanks." "( humming )" "Dan:" "The whole thing's been looked at by attorneys." "Henry:" "I haven't had time to read all this." " That's the last." " What's he doing?" "Jack, we've been trying to reach you all morning." "I was home." "Well, we must have had the wrong number." "Henry, what are you signing?" " It's the contracts, jack." " The contracts?" "We couldn't go forward with moira" "Until we had a firm commitment from henry." "You let this scumbag sell you that line of crap?" "They weren't gonna let moira on the show, until" "You let this scumbag use you like that?" "You believed him?" " But jack-- - henry..." "What about me?" "I made sure your percentage was taken care of." "Don't worry about that." "Yeah, it should be $5,000." "At least." "You son of a bitch!" " ( intercom buzzes ) - get me security." "Fuck you, dan." "I know the way out of here." " Jack." " Easy, easy, henry." "Let him blow off a little steam." "He'll calm down." "Just relax" "You fucked with the wrong guy!" "Jack!" "You, I don't want to see you, ever!" "Those are for you." "( mutters ) son of a bitch..." " ( tires squeal ) - assistant:" "I've got her." "We need you in make-up, moira." "Come on." "It's okay, come on." "How could you do that, moira?" "Jesus!" "You have five minutes." "I can't do this." "It's your first day." "You're a little nervous." "This always helps." " Oh, no." " You want to blow it out there?" "One go swig, calm you right down." ""roads to riches" is gonna go right up your ass, dan." "You watch." "You watch." "Do another." " Hey watch it, jerk!" " Hey, you, too!" "Son of a bitch!" "Showtime." "These fucking guys, I'm telling you..." "Dan, I oughta stick it up your ass, dan." "( laughs )" "Boy, is jack waters sorry now." "( laughs ) oh, jim." "I'm glad you're here." "I got henry." "Boy, did I "got" him." "What?" "I thought you'd be pleased." ""the world inquisitor" may run a story on henry." "That's great!" "No, dan, that's not great." "You see, your girl, moira-- she's a stripper." "And one of her stripper-friends sold her out." "This-- this is not family values." "Oh, shit." "They won't print the story, if she doesn't walk on stage." "You job depends on the next few minutes." "So you better get down there and stop her!" "God, how could you be so stupid?" "Ready in five, four..." " ( cheers ) - welcome to "roads to riches,"" "With america's newest game show host:" "Henry fields from texas." "( cheers )" "Hello, y'all." "How y'all doing out there?" "You okay?" "You look great." "Henry:" "Oh, that's fantastic." "Welcome to "roads to riches."" "America's only live game show." "What you see up here is what you get at home." "First things first, let's bring out our new hostess..." " Three, two, go." " ( gasps ) ...Ms. Moira kennedy." "( music plays )" "( crowd cheers )" "Oh, fuck this!" "( horn honks )" "Dan, I'll fuck you up." "Let's meet our first celebrity contestant of the afternoon." "She's the star of "all my nurses,"" "Ms. Jackie jackson." "( music plays, applause )" "Moira, please show ms." "Jackson to her seat." "Please." "( music resumes, applause )" "Thank you." "Ms. Jackson, you will be selecting your partner for the afternoon," "So please go ahead and do that now." "( music plays )" "Oh, three, that's my favorite number." "Okay, let's meet contestant number three." "She's an elementary school teacher out of wheeling, west virginia," "And a mother of two." "Welcome nancy greenwald to the stage." "( music plays, applause )" "Where is she?" "Okay." "The first category for the afternoon is "commodities."" "Are you ready to play for that fortune, ms." "Greenwald?" "Ms. Jackson?" " Moira-- off the stage!" " Come on, get off the stage!" "Floor director:" "Get off the stage." "( laughs )" "Moira...!" " Come on!" " Get off the stage!" " Get off!" " Moira, come on!" " ( crowd gasps ) - oh, my god!" "Announcer:" "Well, that's a little unusual." "My goodness, a little pratfall there." "All part of the show." "So, relax and enjoy yourself" " No I can do it!" " Come on, come on!" "I can do it!" "Please, I can do it!" "I can do it!" "( sharp ripping )" "( laughter )" "This is the only live game show" "Let her go." " ( crowd gasps ) - announcer:" "Oh, look at that." "My goodness, isn't that funny?" "They think they can do anything they want." "( tires screeching )" "All right." "All right." "( horns honk )" "Give me a hand with this." "Okay, we're here." "Henry:" "She looks mighty peaceful." "I was so angry at her and now I'm scared to death." "I'm sorry, jack." "I'm sorry for what happened." "I'm just a fool, I guess." "That dan smith, he spun me like a fly in a web." "He told me he wasn't going to use moira unless I signed right there." "She was all I could think about." "She didn't know anything about it, jack." "She wouldn't have hurt you." "I acted like a damn fool, jack, and I'm sorry." "It's over now." "Yeah." "Yeah, I guess it is." "She's gonna be okay." "She's gonna be okay." "Thank you, sheila." "Who'd have thought a month ago I'd be here today?" "I'm a washed-up game show host in 30 days." "Moira's gonna be okay." "That's all that matters." "I'm going back to texas." "And I'm taking moira with me." "You can't take moira to texas." "Why not, jack?" "I can give her the life she's always wanted." "A little house, the great outdoors." "No more running around uncertain about tomorrow." "No more run-ins with the things she does to survive." "Maybe moira doesn't want to go back to texas with you." "You ever think of that?" "Maybe she likes it here on the edge." "You think I made her into what she is?" "No, she came that way, henry." "She's got more moves than bobby fischer." "You watch that girl in action" "It's like poetry." "And I like having her around." "You bring her to texas..." "What, put an apron on her?" "She'll shrivel up on you." "Texas, jesus, get out of here." "It's the best thing for her, jack." "And you know it." "You and her, in texas?" "You're right." "She just gets hurt here." "I'll take good care of her, jack." "When she gets ready to come home I'd like..." "To pick her up by myself." "How come you neveloved her?" "Uh..." "Because I can't, henry." "Not me." "All of 'em." "Eight." "All righty, 20 bucks." "What, no "national inquisitor"?" "And one scratcher." "Yes." "( knocking )" "Don't recycle those." "P.A.:" "Patient transport to m.R.I." "Moira?" "What is it with you and me and hospitals?" "They say you're gonna be fine." "I blew it." "I'm sorry, jack." "I blew it for all of us." "I had it right there" ""things that fly."" "It's only money." " ( laughs ) - what?" "You, walking on eggshells." ""it's just money."" "Moira," "I lost my head with you." "I took a drink to calm down." "That was stupid." "How did I get so stupid all of a sudden?" "You got a bad break." "No." "I had a handful of aces," "And I blew it." "So is henry gone yet?" "What makes you say that?" "He's not here, is he?" "He might surprise you." "I think another one of henry's surprises" "Might kill me." "Aw..." "You were here all night, weren't you?" "Hmm..." "I had noplace else to go." "What do you say?" "Feel like getting out of here?" "Yeah." "I'll get you home." "Oh, wait a second here." "Put this on." "That's it." "Okay." "Come on." "Ready?" "You're gonna be okay." " Hi." " Hi." "What's wrong with coming upstairs?" "I wanted to be someplace neutral." "Neutral?" "Henry's going back to texas tomorrow on the bus." "Isn't that perfect?" "You want to sit down?" "I don't want to sit down." "Come on." "Henry asked me to marry him." "Like he's doing me a favor." "Like I should be sent off somewhere." "He's got everything going for him, hasn't he?" "Young." "Who doesn't like young?" "Good looking." "Who doesn't like good looking?" "And lucky." "He's a lucky son of a bitch." "But maybe there's something for me here." "If I had a reason to stay..." "I wouldn't leave if I had a reason to stay." "I'll be glad when I don't have to hear about texas anymore." "How did you feel when you kissed me?" "I told you" "Forget about that." "I thought that maybe we should be" "More than friends." "You know we're more than that." "Jack, I need to know..." "Should I get in that taxi tomorrow morning?" "You'll have something with him." "Nobody gets me like you do." "Nothing good happens to you here." "It wouldn't work." "You don't feel anything?" "Not for a long time." "Okay." "Where are you going?" "I'll see you in the morning." "Moira?" "It's the way I am." "I know." "( squeaking )" "Last meal." "Showtime." "( pops )" "( squeaks )" "Henry's voice:" "That rat is going to go gray with the rest of us" "By the time that you build up the nerve." "( squeaks )" "Henry's voice:" "You're small-time, jack." "You move sideways, I move forward." "Moira's voice:" "I wouldn't leave if I had a reason to stay." "( squeaks )" "♪ well, I could sleep forever ♪" "♪ but it's of her I dream ♪" "♪ if I could sleep forever ♪" "( squeaks )" "♪ I could forget about everything ♪" "( squeaks )" "♪ if I could sleep forever ♪" "♪ if I could sleep forever ♪" "♪ if I could sleep forever... ♪" "( horn honks )" "She's leaving." "All right." "Oh, jesus." "No..." "Maybe... ( squeaking )" "Yeah." "Oh!" "Moira!" "What have you done?" "Moira?" "Oh, you scared me." "You scared me to death." "I couldn't do it." "I'm a coward." "I'm a coward." "No." "Yeah." "I'm just a failure." "I couldn't do it." "You're strong, moira." "Living is the hard part." "This is the tough stuff." "You're my strong girl." "I don't want to be without you." "Oh, baby." " Just take me to mexico." " Yeah." "I don't care if we don't have anything." "We can live in a shack." "We can live on a beach." "Yeah." " Promise?" " Anything." "Anything you want." "We'll be fine as long as we're together." "I will never let you go again, moira." "I've always loved you." "Will you tell henry?" "( salsa music begins )" "♪ báilalo, báilalo ♪" "♪ como lo baila olga, olga ♪" "♪ báilalo, báilalo ♪" "♪ como lo baila olga, olga ♪" "♪ gózalo, gózalo ♪" "♪ como lo goza olga, olga ♪" "♪ gózalo, gózalo ♪" "♪ como lo goza olga, olga... ♪" "( waves crashing )"