"What do you think you're doing, Doc?" "An impromptu auditory exam." "Did I pass?" "With flying colors, which leads me to believe that you did hear me when I requested you meet me this morning." "You're right." "I forgot." "I see." "I realize your Sick Bay training is purely voluntary, but you haven't spent any time there in several weeks, and when I... try to find you, you're always in the holodeck." "Correct me if I'm wrong, Doc, but we haven't been treating anything more serious than an ingrown toenail." "That's beside the point." "If an emergency were to happen, you must be prepared." "You're too far behind in your medical texts to be wasting your time in the holodeck!" "If it's any consolation, I have spent most of the morning immersed in a complicated surgical procedure." "Really?" "A classic case of atrophied shocks." "They needed to be extracted to prevent chrome abrasion." "It was touch and go for a while, but the prognosis is excellent." "You'll be ready for neurosurgery in no time." "Take a look at this, Doc." "This is a fully stock 1969 Chevy Camaro-- one of the earliest muscle cars ever made." "Imagine:" "Northern California, late 20th century." "You're cruising up Highway 1." "The woofers are pounding." "The wind is whipping through your hair." "Medieval safety constraints... internal combustion system producing lethal levels of carbon monoxide." "Hmm. I stand corrected." "This may be just what you need to get you back to Sick Bay." "I guess I should have known this wouldn't interest you." "It's too much fun." "This isn't about fun, Mr. Paris." "Serving in Sick Bay is a privilege." "I'd expect you to realize that." "Oh, I do." "I'll be there." "Soon." "Lieutenant Paris, report to the Bridge immediately." "I'm on my way." "Somebody call for a driver?" "Take your station, Tom." "Anything on scans, Harry?" "I'm picking up another spatial distortion 2, 000 kilometers away." "Source?" "I have no idea." "It looks like space is folding in on itself." "Shields to full." "It's an alien vessel." "One occupant aboard." "Captain, it looks like that ship is being powered by a coaxial warp drive." "Coaxial what?" "It's a hypothetical propulsion system." "Starfleet engineers have been dreaming about it for years." "In theory, it can literally fold the fabric of space allowing a ship to travel instantaneously across huge distances." "The alien warp drive is overloading." "In theory, a coaxial drive explosion... could collapse space within a radius of a billion kilometers." "In theory." "Well, let's keep theory from becoming reality." "Red Alert." "Scan the vessel." "Can we beam the pilot out?" "Too much interference." "That ship's about had it, Captain." "The coaxial core is breaching." "We should vacate this area of space at once." "We can't just leave him like this." "Try one more hail." "Nothing." "Maybe he's ignoring us." "Or maybe he's unconscious." "We've got to do something." "Suggestions?" "A symmetric warp field." "That should contain any instabilities in his space folding core." "How can you be sure?" "Advanced subspace geometry." "It's the one course at the Academy where l actually paid attention." "We'll tractor him in to kill his momentum and generate a warp field around his ship." "His flight path is erratic." "We'd be risking collision." "Captain, I can make this work." "Do it." "Passing through the residual folds in space." "Steady." "Got him!" "I've extended our warp field around his vessel." "His core is powering down." "Nice flying, Tom." "My pleasure." "We're finally receiving a hail." "Open a channel." "Captain Janeway of the Federation Starship Voyager." "Do you need medical attention?" "I'm fine, Captain." "Unfortunately, my ship is not." "If you need to make repairs, we might be able to help." "That's very generous." "We'll beam you aboard in a few minutes." "Stand by." "Thank you." "Tuvok." "Energize." "Welcome." "Captain." "I know you put yourselves in danger to rescue me." "I want to thank you." "I'm glad we could help." "I was so eager to test my new engine, I pushed it beyond its limits." "Coaxial warp doesn't seem to be the smoothest way to travel." "It's a violent procedure, but it allows a ship to travel through space at incredible speeds." "Considering the dangers, this method of travel hardly seems logical." "That's probably true, but if I were worrying about danger, I wouldn't have become a test pilot." "Where are you from?" "The fourth planet in the Benthan system." "That's about 20 light- years from here." "I'll speak to my engineers about helping you with repairs." "Without your coaxial drive, it's a long way home." "Come in." "I'd like to ask you a favor." "I need a change of pace." "I'd like to help Steth repair his ship." "This isn't a good time to ask." "What do you mean?" "I've been reading a report from the Doctor." "You didn't show up today." "Well, I was a little busy this morning... saving someone's life, as I recall." "is there something wrong, Tom?" "Anything bothering you?" "Nothing is wrong." "Since when is not wanting to spend time with the Doctor a capital offense?" "You'd have to throw the whole crew in the brig for that one." "Maybe. I was just wondering if there's something on your mind." "You're showing up for your duty shifts, you do what's required, but your heart doesn't seem to be in it." "You seem preoccupied." "Like I said, I think I need a change of pace." "You're a different man from the one that came on board four years ago." "You've taken charge of your life, turned yourself around." "I'd hate to see you ruin it." "I won't." "With your permission, I'll report to Sick Bay." "Permission denied." "Report to Steth's ship instead." "Assist in the repairs." "We need our best man on the job." "And on my way back, I made the mistake of flying the prototype through restricted Entaban territory." "And?" "And, uh... the Entabans weren't too pleased to see me." "I limped back to the engineers on Benthos with phaser holes through their brand- new exatanium fuselage." "I think they would have been happier to see phaser holes through me." "When I was 16, I followed an ancient human custom." "I took my father's shuttle out for a joyride and proceeded to fry all the relays." "I'm guessing he wasn't happy about getting it back." "Actually, he didn't." "As far as I know, it's still at the bottom of Lake Tahoe." "Here it is." "The coaxial induction drive." "It draws in subatomic particles and reconfigures their internal geometries." "And this is what makes folding space possible?" "At least in spurts." "Unfortunately, particle instabilities keep overloading my engines, but I'm going to make it work." "I have to keep in motion." "I don't like the thought of settling down-- too many new ships to drive, too many intriguing women." "Yeah. I guess so." "When I get this ship back, I'm going to be doing the first test on a new Mithran- class fighter." "I'm told it's more advanced than any warship in the Quadrant." "Why don't you come with me?" "We'd have a great time." "You can meet up with Voyager afterwards." "I- l'd love to do that." "It sounds very exciting... but I have responsibilities here, people who count on me and B'Elanna would be furious." "B'Elanna." "I have to go." "So, you started without me." "I finished without you." "You're a little late." "Uh, sorry." "I was helping Steth repair his ship." "How's it going?" "Um...pretty slow." "We're both stuck on how to prevent the particle overloads in his propulsion system." "Have you tried an isokinetic containment field?" "Yeah." "That's the first thing we tried." "How long do you think these repairs are going to take?" "I don't know." "I was just hoping that maybe you could help me recalibrate the plasma manifolds tonight." "Uh..." "I, uh... I probably should go help Steth." "Tom, is there something wrong?" "Why are you interrogating me?" "I didn't think I was." "It sounds more like you want me to account for every minute that I'm not with you." "That's ridiculous." "Can't I have some time to myself?" "Can't I do what I want without having to report every detail of it to you?" "Tom, you can do whatever you want." "I just wanted to know if there was something wrong." "I mean, lately, you've been canceling dates, you hide out for hours in the holodeck... I am not hiding anything." "That is ridiculous." "is it?" "You haven't even told me what holodeck program this is that has you so fascinated." ""The Dancing Girls of Ninipia Prime."" "It's very entertaining." "Very funny." "You're overreacting." "I am not overreacting." "There is obviously something going on and you're refusing to admit it." "Good evening, Lieutenants." "I see you don't have your dinner yet, Tom." "Can I get you something?" " l'm really not hungry." " Excuse me." "Are you going to talk to me about this?" "Because if you're not, I don't want to sit here anymore." "If you can carry on an adult conversation without all the histrionics..." "Good night, Tom." "Computer, run a DNA stability analysis." "How long before my genome reverts to its previous form?" "Time to reversion:" "Three hours, 13 minutes." "Complete genome recovery is imminent." "So I was lying in bed last night when it hit me." "What you need is a carburetor." "A carburetor?" "Yes. lt's a device that's hundreds of years old." "I can't believe I didn't think of it yesterday." "Wait." "Hundreds of years old?" "Surely that couldn't be of any use to us now." "It all goes back to basics." "You would be surprised at how often I find solutions to 24th century problems in 20th century technology." "Computer, access Paris program Alpha 1:"Grease Monkey."" "Grease monkey?" "Mechanic lingo." "A car's engine can't run on pure fuel, so the carburetor supplies it with a mixture of vaporized fuel and air." "And you think we need a device like that to dilute the particle stream as it enters the coaxial drive." "Exactly, and a spare polaric modulator from Voyager's impulse drive should do the trick." "Subatomic dilution!" "Oh!" "It never would have occurred to me." "I think you've solved it." "Well, we can run a few simulations on the holodeck before we actually try it." "Oh..." "I owe you a lot." "Well, you can thank my lucky toolbox." "It's gotten me out of hot water more than once." "Mmm." "You're lucky to be stationed on a ship like this." "Replicators to feed and clothe you holotechnology to cater to every whim, hallways filled with women." "Yeah." "It's great." "Well, you don't sound convinced." "Aren't you happy here?" "Of course I'm happy." "I'm very happy." "I mean..." "I pilot one of the most advanced ships in Starfleet." "I have a beautiful girlfriend." "I'm respected." "I have everything that I've ever wanted." "You're lucky." "You're part of a family, part of a structure." "You have rules to guide you." "You don't have to worry about making a lot of choices." "I usually go to bed at night not knowing what the next day has in store... what trouble I might get into." "You don't have to worry about those things." "You're very settled." "I remember those days." "I used to be a lot like you-- going anywhere... doing whatever I wanted... making my own rules." "Well, then there's hope for me yet." "Maybe someday I'll settle down, too, but...for now..." "I prefer to stay on the move." "Sometimes..." "I wish that's what I was doing." "Things'll turn around for you." "I've always found that change is inevitable." "It comes when you least expect it." "Yeah, I suppose." "Now, are we ready to try this carburetor idea on my ship?" "Just give me five more minutes to finish up here and I'll be right with you." "Five minutes." "And, Tom... don't dismiss the suggestion I made...about coming with me to fly the new ship." "It might be fun to escape the shackles for a while." "Hmm." "Computer, access all files pertaining to Lieutenant Tom Paris." "Download into Memory Core Alpha." "Please enter authorization code." "Access granted." "Commencing download." "Hello." "I'm Steth... a guest of your Captain." "I have been apprised of your presence on Voyager." "You are not authorized to access the ship's computers." "You must be Seven of Nine." "That is correct." "Tom mentioned you." "He thinks you're extremely intelligent." "Lieutenant Paris' opinion of me is irrelevant to your being in this room." "Well, uh..." "Tom felt we needed some files for polaric modulators, but he was called away before we could access them." "I thought I'd find them myself and help out." "You were mistaken." "He must be present to download these files." "Oh, I'm about to meet him at the holodeck." "We can find the files there." "Voyager's hierarchy is complex." "See that you familiarize yourself with it." "Good advice." "I'll do that." "Captain's Log, Stardate 517 62. 4." "The repairs to Steth's coaxial drive have been completed well ahead of schedule." "Everything here looks good." "Just give me one more second to check the flow- field parameters." "Go ahead." "It's my box wrench." "I've been looking all over for this." "I know. I should've asked you, Tom, but I needed it for an experiment." "To, uh...check your new carburetor?" "Not quite." "You're the first humans I've met and that wrench had enough cellular residue on it for me to check your DNA." "I have good news." "We're compatible." "Consider this a favor." "I know how unhappy you've been with this dreary, settled life, so I'm taking it off your hands." "I'm betting there's still some fun to be had here." "Voyager is a great ship, Tom." "I'll take good care of it." "Sorry I'm late." "We were beginning to wonder if you were ever coming back." "His ship is powering engines." "Something wrong, Tom?" "It's nothing." "I'm just really going to miss that guy." "Mind if I join you?" "Not at all..." "Commander." ""Chakotay" will do, Tom." "You don't have to carry this"rules" thing too far." "I've been discussing your engineering report with the Captain." "She was wondering if we could implement some of Steth's technology here on Voyager." "Really?" "We thought maybe you could start on a shuttle." "Do you think you can do it?" "I'm sure I can." "Great." "You can start right after you finish with the Doctor." "The Doctor?" "He needs your help in Sick Bay." "I told him you'd be there." "Of course." "Lieutenant." "Hi." "I know you've been avoiding the Doctor, but don't tell me you've forgotten where Sick Bay is." "Oh...not yet." "I was just trying to figure out if there's a more efficient route between Sick Bay and my quarters." "I didn't realize you were that eager to get there." "So tell me-- are they ready yet?" "Uh...not yet." "But they will be soon." "Great." "Hey, let me know if you have any problems." "Polyduranide can be tough to replicate." "Oh, it sure can be." "I can't wait to get my hands around one of those clubs." "Ensign Kaplan won't know what hit her." "What?" "We're going to play golf with her." "We scheduled a rematch, remember?" "Oh, of course." "I can't wait." "Have you been working on your putting?" "You missed both those two- footers last time." "I won't let it happen again." "All right." "Give the Doc my best." "I will... if I ever find him." "You're early, Mr. Paris." "I see some good came from my report to Commander Chakotay." "Let's put these extra few minutes to good use." "Begin with a thorough bio- bed diagnostic." "I want you to recalibrate each physiosensor, making sure to enter every metabolic referent precisely." "Okay." "When you're through with that, run a protein structure analysis and then continue your review of the 37 steps of a cardiopulmonary reconstruction procedure." "I'll leave you to your bio- beds." "Did you forget to disengage the scan emitters?" "Sorry." "Mr. Paris!" "I don't know what's wrong." "I realize it's complicated, but you must try again." "Actually, I'm not feeling so well." "How fortunate you're already in Sick Bay." "I'll run a few scans." "Uh, no, no, Doc." "That's all right." "To be perfectly honest with you, uh...this is so frustrating for me." "I usually pick things up a lot faster than this." "You're here to learn, Mr. Paris." "It will get easier with time." "Well, that's easy for you to say." "Excuse me?" "Well, no offense, Doctor, but... you were programmed to be a medical genius." "Things always come easy to you." "Me, I'm just a pilot, a...grease monkey." "And as hard as I might try to become a better assistant to you, it's clear to me now that I'll never be half the healer that you are." "Do you mean to tell me you've been trying to live up to my standards?" "I'm afraid I have." "It all makes sense now." "The misplaced aggression, the shirking of responsibilities... all classic signs of an inferiority complex." "I had no idea my superior abilities were affecting your psyche so strongly." "Take the rest of the day off." "Reflect on your strengths." "Realize your worth." "I'll do that, Doctor." "Thank you." "B'Elanna." "What do you think you're doing?" "Putting." "In my quarters?" "I can't putt in your quarters?" "No." "Since when?" "Tom... what is this?" "That is... a sand wedge." "It's used for getting out of traps." "Why is it here?" "I replicated it for you." "I thought we could play a little game of golf on the holodeck before dinner." "So this is your idea of an adult conversation?" "I don't know what you are trying to accomplish with this little stunt, but let me assure you, it is not working." "I am sorry if you are bored because Steth is gone, but that doesn't mean that you can just walk in here and pretend like you haven't been shutting me out." "You're being a little hard on Steth." "If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here right now." "Really?" "I mentioned to him that we were having some problems and he urged me to... come and talk to you, to try to work things out, to admit I was wrong." "I made a mistake, B'Elanna, and I'm sorry." "I won't shut you out anymore." "In fact, I went to the Doctor and begged to be excused from my duties." "I realize it's only a few extra hours, but they're hours I want to spend with you." "Steth...turned out to be a positive influence on you." "Computer, where..." "Com" " Computer, where are we?" "Navigation matrix 17 1 1, the Kotaba Expanse." "Coaxial leap complete." "How far are we from Voyager?" "Computer, lock in Voyager's last known coordinates and activate differential induction drive." "Unable to execute command." "Why not?" "The differential induction drive has been secured." "A security access code is required to implement the coaxial leap." "This is Commander Avik of the Benthan Guard." "We're taking you into custody." "Prepare to surrender the vessel to us at once." "Benthan?" "I need a second to explain, Commander." "I'm not who you think..." "We do not negotiate with thieves." "No...you don't understand!" "I- l need this ship to get back to Voyager." "Surrender the vessel peacefully or we will use force." "Why is everybody trying to shoot me today?" "You know what I'm here for." "I don't know what you're talking about." "Who are you?" "I'm Steth." "What?" "Look at me." "You did wear this body for nearly a year before you switched it with mine." "That's my body you're in now." "I want it back." "Bear with me for...for a second." "We have more in common than you might think." "This better be good, Tom." "I left Vorik right in the middle of an EPS recalibration." "You can thank me later." "So what's my big surprise?" "What would you say to 24 glorious hours on the famed fourth planet of the Kendren System?" "You mean the planet where Neelix is gathering food samples?" "Mm- hmm. I ran a few scans and found the most incredible beach on one of the smaller continents." "I replicated a picnic lunch for us." "Voyager isn't leaving orbit until tomorrow." "We'd have an entire day." "Only a day?" "Oh, I think that we would need at least a week." "Oh, I wish we could, but we've only got a day." "You're serious, aren't you?" "Completely." "Do you know how much trouble we would be in?" "What could Janeway do, execute us?" "Tom, I am swamped." "I can't get away for an hour, let alone 24." "B'Elanna... I have responsibilities here." "We both do." "Responsibilities?" "I don't care!" "Tom, you're hurting me." "You're a real disappointment to me." "Do you know that?" "I don't know what I ever saw in you." "Seven." "What brings you here at this hour?" "We were supposed to meet in the shuttle bay at 2100 hours." "Did you forget?" "I did." "I got so caught up with my reading, I guess it slipped my mind." "Sorry." "The capillaries in your eyes are swollen, Lieutenant, and I see signs of vascular congestion in your cheeks." "Are you intoxicated?" "No, not at all." "I was just exploring the replicator-- trying some alien beverages." "Only a few were alcoholic." "You are not officially off duty for another 78 minutes." "I'm on break." "Would you like to join me?" "I could replicate another Trakian ale for you." "That will not be necessary." "Oh, relax, Seven." "You're not on the Borg cube anymore." "We could finish our work on the shuttle tomorrow." "That would be an inefficient use of our time." "I will complete the work myself." "Fine." "Before I leave, I would like to know why you were reading the Captain's personal logs." "I wasn't." "I saw the padd." "It was unmistakably the Captain's logs." "You're wrong." "You're...confused." "You couldn't possibly have seen anything." "You know I possess an eidetic memory." "I require only seconds to commit what I see to memory." "Would you like me to quote the passage you were reading?" "I'm warning you-- stay out of my way!" "Don't interfere in things that don't concern you." "If you bother me again, I will make things very unpleasant for you." "Remove your hand from my arm." "Don't be foolish." "You'll regret it." "Enter." "You wanted to see me, Captain." "Yes." "I received a rather disturbing report from Seven of Nine regarding your conduct last night." "She claims you were drinking on duty." "She's mistaken, Captain." "Don't lie to me, Tom." "I checked the computers." "You replicated five alcoholic beverages in the Mess Hall." "She also said you threatened her." "I'm sorry, Captain." "B'Elanna and I had an argument." "I was upset." "And is that why you were reading my personal logs?" "I wasn't." "Seven recited a passage I'd written word for word." "She probably accessed those files herself." "Captain, you can't take the word of a Borg over mine." "This has to stop, Tom." "Your conduct lately has been bizarre and I've heard far too many complaints from far too many people to dismiss it" "Chakotay, the Doctor, Seven of Nine." "They're all worried about you, and so am I." "You're right, Captain." "I need some rest." "I'll go right to my quarters." "Tom... as your Captain and as your friend... I want you to report to Sick Bay for some tests." "We have to find out if there's something physical that's causing this behavior." "This is crazy." "I don't need any help." "That's an order." "Security, I need you in the ready room now!" "Are you hurt, Captain?" "No." "Take him to Sick Bay." "Keep security with him." "The coaxial drive will be on line in a few minutes." "Good. I've just about overridden all the lockout commands." "No offense, but I'd like to get out of your body as soon as possible." "The alien seems capable of some sort of selective DNA exchange." "He absorbs new DNA while depositing his current genetic material into his victims." "Let's hope he can reverse that process." "That's the last lockout command." "We're set for coaxial warp." "Let's find Voyager." "Captain's Log, supplemental." "The Doctor has treated Mr. Paris' phaser wounds, but has been unable to wake him." "The motive for his attack remains a mystery." "Neurological scans yielded very little, but I did find something very interesting in his blood analysis." "There are traces of a second DNA pattern in his nucleotide structure." "Possibly the result of a genetic virus." "Could this be the cause of his recent behavior?" "I don't know, but I'm running more scans to see how this might have affected his neurological functions." "Captain, a vessel just emerged from coaxial space off our starboard bow." "Keep me informed, Doctor." "Hail them." "Captain Janeway." "Welcome back, Mr. Steth." "I know this sounds crazy, Captain, but I'm not Steth." "I'm Tom Paris." "I beg your pardon." "We're dealing with an alien who's some sort of identity thief." "He traded places with me." "Please beam us aboard." "Maintain your position while we consider your request." "End transmission." "Hold him in a tractor beam until you hear from me." "Aye, Captain." "I have a feeling Steth and his new friend are behind whatever's happened to Tom." "Captain?" "No time to explain." "I'll be in Sick Bay." "Captain?" "Commander, I'm reading an unauthorized shuttle launch." "It's the Captain." "She's in the shuttle Tom's been working on." "Try hailing her." "She's not responding." "Hail Steth's ship." "Look, I don't know who you are, but I want to know what's happening here." "Who's on that shuttle?" "Captain Janeway." "No. I'm betting the alien switched my body..." "Tom's body for hers." "You've got to let us out of this tractor beam." "We can catch her with this ship." "Chakotay... it's me." "How do I know that?" "The other day in your office, you told me I'd turned my life around." "Well, give me the chance to prove it." "Let me go after the shuttle." "It is the only way we can get everybody back into the right body." "Harry... disengage the tractor beam." "20, 000 kilometers and closing." "Has he detected us yet?" "I'd say he has." "Gentlemen, I'd advise you to reconsider this pursuit." "Killing me will only keep you trapped in those bodies." "He's right." "We can't risk killing him." "Yeah, but nothing's keeping him from killing us." "Damn!" "The ship's not nearly as maneuverable as a shuttle." "Shields are down." "I'm surprised you're so eager to reclaim your life on Voyager, Tom." "I was just as disappointed with it as you were." "Then I guess we were both wrong." "It's time to move on again." "Oh, Tom...be sure to send my best regards to B'Elanna." "Hmm?" "He's charging the coaxial drive." "Set the sensors to track him." "I can't." "He's blocking us." "We won't be able to follow him once he goes into coaxial warp." "We're losing him!" "The carburetor!" "We added a polaric modulator to the coaxial drive." "If I can target the modulator, hit it with a chromoelectric pulse, that'll disrupt his engines." "Here goes." "I hope you still have my box wrench." "Faulty carburetors can be a pain to fix." "Captain's Log, Stardate 5177 5. 2." "While the alien intruder remains trapped in the body of his last victim, the Doctor has found a way to return Tom, Steth and me to our own bodies." "Doctor, I can't thank you enough." "You've given me my life back." "All in a day's work." "There were times when I thought I would be stuck in that body forever." "And believe me, I'm just as happy to be back to the old Tom Paris." "What do you plan to do now?" "I'm going to take her back to Bentha." "I hope to find the person who belongs to that body." "But who knows if that's the end of it?" "We have no idea how long she or he has been switching identities." "It may take a while... but I will do whatever I can to find everyone you've violated." "A security team will escort her to your ship and erect a force field to contain her." "So this is where you've been hiding?" "A garage?" "It's more than just a garage." "This is a monument to hundreds and hundreds of hours... that I probably should have spent with you." "Probably?" "Definitely." "It's a lovely garage, Tom, but I still don't understand why you brought me here." "Well, consider it a symbolic gesture." "It's my less- than- subtle attempt to..." "let you in." "I see." "To make it clear that I mean almost as much to you as a... a cam- a- ro." "It's a mint condition 1969... ca- mare- oh." "And, yes...you mean a lot more to me."