""Nothing." "She supposed." "This was real life." "And real life was difficult." "At best." "Hadn't she learnt that  when she was a little girl?" "Why did she think falling in love  would make it easier?" "Why did she think  falling in love  would make it any..." "easier?"" "#... in ancient time" "# Walk upon England's mountains green?" "# And was the holy Lamb of God..." "# On England's pleasant pastures seen?" "# And did the countenance divine" "# Shine forth upon our clouded hills?" "# And was Jerusalem builded here" "# Among those dark satanic mills?" "# Bring me my bow of burning gold!" "# Bring me my arrows of desire!" "# Bring me my spear:" "O clouds unfold!" "# Bring me my chariots of fire!" "# I will not cease from mental fight" "# Nor shall my sword sleep in my hand" "# Till we have built Jerusalem" "# In England's green and pleasant land" "What were you talking to Tess's mum about?" "She just invited us back to the reception." "And she wanted to know where Rob was." "...and he couldn't explain why," "I couldn't explain why," "I suppose my dad couldn't explain why." "And my grandfather couldn't explain why... except beg forgiveness." "Tradition doesn't do anything for anybody." "Tradition doesn't put bread on the table." "It doesn't pay the bills, doesn't pay the mortgage..." "Where's your mum and dad gone?" "They're on holiday." "I've got to go and see the nurse." "Be back in a bit." "And then we'll finish packing." "OK, Mum?" "Are you all right there, Mum?" "Steady." "All right?" "Gail?" "Gail?" "Nice to have you back, Nan." "Your bed's been made up for you." "Just pop your bag down there, I'll bring it in a bit later." "Is it him again, Rach?" "Yeah." "Fuck, does Larry always phone this much?" "Sometimes." "He knows you're seeing someone else?" " No." "Maybe you should tell him." "Why?" "You know, just give him a little excuse to hate you." "That'd get rid of him." "You're gonna have to go." " Why?" "Gonna fuck him?" "Who you been trying to phone?" "No-one." "How's your Granddad?" "He's all right." "Coming out soon." "So he's better now, then?" "I don't know if he's fully better, like." "I've got to go and pick him up." "Gran asked me." "I had to say yes - I felt a bit guilty, else." "Yeah, I ain't been to see either of them since he went in." "Yeah, picking him up is the least I can do." "It gets me away from work and all." "How long have they been married?" "God." "Fuck knows." "Along time." "I've missed you." "Good." "Nice game, Joel." "Saw Tess's mum the other day." "Did she say anything to you?" "She didn't see me." "I just sort of hid." "What for?" "I didn't want her asking me why I wasn't at the funeral." "Why didn't you come, Rob?" "Just... couldn't face it." "I'd never inject." "How's Rob?" "Don't know." "Haven't you seen him?" "No." "How was he at the funeral?" "He wasn't there." "You didn't tell me." "You didn't go." "Did he love her?" "Yeah, he did." "Why didn't you come?" "You know why." "I only come back for you now." "Please don't look at them." "I don't mind them." "I do." "Do you think Rob's injecting now?" "I don't know." "You know he must be if Tess was." "Maybe." "Promise me." "I know." "I wouldn't." "I saw it with you." "You do love me, don't you?" "Yeah." "Are you sure you're not up to it?" "Look, I'm sure." " Why ever not?" "I just don't feel like it today, OK?" "OK, fine, if that's how you feel." "Have they got anything at the library for you?" "I think there's a few you didn't pick up last time." "Just get those." "And can you get me some fags?" "Have you got any money?" " No." "Well, how do I pay for them?" "You still owe me for last week." "Can you just take it out of my disability benefit?" "OK, I need to cash that anyway." "Thanks." "I won't be long, just a few hours or so." "Fine." "Can you look after Nan?" "You can make her a cup of tea." "Don't keep making her loads." "I won't." "Bye, then, love." " Bye, Mum." "70, 80, 85... 88... and 64." "Rob!" "Hello, Granddad." "Thank you for bringing him home." "And I worry." "About me?" "And about us." "About you being here without me." "You know I don't do what they do." "Never lie to me, would you?" "No." "Please don't ever do anything to make me leave you." "I wouldn't." "So, are we still seeing each other?" "I dunno." "Are you coming to bed?" "No." "Wake up." "Not yet." "I'll see you in a minute, OK?" "Gail!" "It's gone midday, love." "Your lady will be here soon." "Please don't make her wait again." "Can you hear me, Gail?" "And the last time you were outside?" "What was that like?" "I can't explain." "It just felt like I couldn't make any connections between my thoughts." "Could you explain a little bit more about your thoughts and what they were like?" "I would feel like my body was falling apart just... dissolving like I was going to just disappear." "But the new prescription's better?" "They seem OK, but they make me sleep more." "Well, that's to be expected." "It's just your body getting used to the dosage." "Is there anything else you want to talk about, Gail?" "I wish you could come more often." "I'm afraid that er these visits are as regular as my schedule will allow." "Home visits like this are quite difficult to arrange." "Still, it's progress that the new medication's working." "Rachel!" "Get on with it." "Frank!" "Frank?" "I'm going now." "I'll be back in about an hour." "OK?" "# If I got on my knees and I pleaded with you" "# Not to go but to stay in my arms" "# Would you walk out the door" "# Like you did once before?" "# This time be different" "# Please stay" "# Don't go" "# If I call out your name like a prayer" "# Would you leave me alone in my fear?" "# Knowing I need you so" "# Would you still turn and go?" "# This time # This time" "# Be different # Be different" "# Please stay" "Oi!" " What?" "Why didn't you fucking tell me?" "Tell you what, Larry?" "You fucking know what- about that cunt with the bike." "Touch me." "# AFX:" "Reunion 2" "Out the fucking window, dickhead." "My mum smells this shit a mile off, man." "Fuck, I need a piss!" "That was a beast." "Told you." "Stop there." "Have I taken quite a bit?" "Yeah, put more in that." "Carry on." "You can stop." "Another one?" "He looks like he needs one, though." "Pack the fuck out of this one." "He's gonna die, ain't he?" "Oi, man, this is for you, mate." " No, I'm all right." "We just made this for you." " He doesn't fucking want one, Joel." "What?" "Cunt by name, cunt by nature." "What the fuck's wrong with you?" "... when we love somebody." "Because loving is a painful thing." "That is its nature." "Today, even though we are not sure that the pain will pass, it has to be said  that our loving is hurting us." "It's a three-month waiting list for the methadone programme." "I take it you want me to recommend you?" "I don't want to come back." "The next time we see each other I don't want it to be here." "Has Sarah gone back?" "Yeah, she went back this morning." "How's her course going?" "It's all right, I think." "We didn't really talk about it that much." "Nice to see her, though?" "Yeah, it was good." "Sound." "Still getting shit off your parents?" "What?" "To get a job, you mean?" "Yeah." "No." "They've eased off over the last few weeks." "Probably because of Tess." "How was the funeral?" "What do you want to know?" "How was Tess's mum?" "Yeah, she was all right." "As good as you could expect..." "I guess." "She asked about you, Rob." "I think she used to quite like me." "We got on well for a while, you know..." "me and Jean." "I saw you there, Rob." "I thought you did." "So why didn't you come in?" "Why did you leave?" "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry I didn't call before the funeral." "I couldn't have gone in." "They all know what she fucking died of, David." "And I was her boyfriend." "Couldn't handle them all talking, fucking staring at me." "I was a coward." "I've been a stupid fucking coward." "You haven't." "It's just a fucked up thing." "I never used to think about getting old, growing up or dying." "I never used to think about those things." "It wasn't your fault, Rob." "No-one makes someone do that." " I know." "But I'll never see her face again." "What the fuck's a month?" "What?" "You forget that fucking easy?" "I haven't forgot... forgotten anything." "I just want to be on my own at the moment, OK?" "Am I meant to be fucking blind?" " What are you talking about?" "You know fucking well what I'm talking about." "Don't play fucking dumb with me." "Why do it in my face?" "What's it got to do with you?" "We're not seeing each other." "You're fucking him, aren't you?" " No." "Have you done anything with him?" "Don't do this." " I'm not doing anything." "You're fucking doing it to me." "It's you." "I haven't done anything to hurt you." "You're doing it to yourself." "Doing what?" "Texting me and phoning me all the time." "You know I'll answer because I care for you and then you just hurl abuse at me." "So you don't want me to call you?" "Not if you're going to shout "bitch" at me all the time." "Well, you fucking are." "Then don't phone me." "I hate you so fucking much." "I don't care." "You made me stop loving you." "You can't get that this is hard for me too." "I have to let you go but it's making me hurt." "You don't look like you are." "You don't make it easy to show." "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" "I've got to go." " No, don't go." "What does that mean?" "You know what you're like, everyone does." "Always accusing me of trying to fuck your friends." "Of flirting round them..." "You know all that's bullshit." "You just enjoy making me feel like shit." "We're finished." "So leave me alone." "I'm going." "And don't phone back." "My mum wants me." " I don't give a shit." "I'm going." " No, don't go." "Don't put that fucking phone down." "Talk to me." "Fuck!" "I fucking hate her." "I wish we didn't have to score off such a fucking bitch." "She did say half-six." "I know she did." "She's just playing God." "Where are you going, Nan?" "Nan?" "Nan?" "You can't go outside, Nan." "Nan, you're not allowed outside." "Yes, I am." "No, you're not." "Nan..." "Please." "Go back inside and I'll make you a cup of tea." "Enough tea." "I want to go out." "Did you like being out?" "I thought it was beautiful out there." "The trees always look special at this time of year." "I prefer summer, mind." "He liked autumn, though." "Who?" "He loved this time." "The leaves changing colour." "Then, in spring he used to bring me blossom." "Who did?" "Michael." "Who's Michael?" " You are a good girl." "You are, you know?" "And this is a good life." "And as long as you don't weaken..." "Food's ready!" "You've forgiven me?" "It was such a long time ago." "Why does it still matter?" "Because I can't forget it." "Do you still love me?" "Do you think that someone could die of a broken heart?" "What do you mean?" "There was this couple in the hospital, older than us." "They shared a private room." "I only noticed them because they seemed so close." "She couldn't do much for herself." "He had to care for her." "Feed her and so on." "She passed away a few days after I arrived." "Didn't see much of him then." "But when I did... he looked different." "He died the night before I came out." "I knew then how much I wanted to come home." "But when I saw you, something still wouldn't let me touch you." "But I wanted to." "I'll just get you a cup of tea, Nan." "Gail!" "See you later." " See you." "Have you noticed he's stopped wearing T-shirts?" "Do you think he injects now?" "I know he does." "When are your mum and dad coming back?" "Tomorrow." "Have you never seen that before?" "No." "Keep it." "Hi, this is Sarah." "Leave me a message and I'll get back to you." "I don't remember Granddad." "You wouldn't." "He died when your dad was very young." "He was the youngest, you see." "The youngest of ten." "They had ten kids?" "Imagine losing your husband when you've got ten kids." "She brought them up on her own, you know?" "Why didn't she ever re-marry?" "Your dad said... she was only ever interested in one man and when he died, she didn't want anybody else." "I think she felt she'd already had her family." "Blessed, as she would say." "I'm gonna have to go and see your dad." "Will you come?" ""Nothing." "She supposed." "This was real life." "And real life was difficult." "At best." "Hadn't she learnt that, when she was a little girl?" "Why did she think falling in love would make it easier?" "Why did she think..." "falling in love  would make it any... easier?"" "Subtitles by LeapinLar"