"On "one tree hill"..." "You...are fired." "Brooke:" "i want to have a baby," "And i realize that what i actually want is to have a family." "Carrie!" "What are you doing?" "!" "This is not okay!" "You have to get out of here!" "It's okay, nathan." "Haley, this isn't this, okay?" "I want you to get the hell out of my house right now!" "No, you stay away from us!" "This marriage is over!" "Haley!" "I want a divorce." "I still love you, lucas." "Peyton, i..." "I'm sorry, lucas." "I can't marry you." "Jamie!" "Nanny carrie!" "Jamie!" "Won't mama be mad?" "Carrie: no." "Besides..." "I'm gonna be your mama now." "If you decide to go anywhere near my family ever again..." "I'd have no problem killing you." "Mama!" "Oh, baby!" "Come here!" "Sweetie, what happened to you?" "Are you okay?" "I'm fine." "Grandpa dan saved me. capture:frm@óåñåµä±ù sync:frs@will one tree hill s05e13" "Hey, dan." "Grandpa!" "Jamie!" "Jamie!" "Hey, buddy." "Jamie." "I got to go now." "You go back to your mom, okay?" "Go on." "Go on." "Grandpa." "Thank you." "I guess i still find it hard to let jamie out of my sight.Its just..." "It's only been a month since he was abducted." "Is it so crazy that i would still hear echoes from that day," "That i would still be a little overprotective?" "Protective or overprotective?" "You said overprotective." "Okay." "You said it yourself." "Identification is the first step to recovery, right?" "How have things been going since nathan moved home?" "Better." "We've spent the past four sessions discussing you and nathan as a couple," "As parents to jamie." "Let's talk about you as individuals." "Who are you, haley?" "You mean, like, what do i do for a living, or what are my hobbies, or..." "No, i mean who are you?" "Well, my name is brooke davis," "And i own a fashion line called clothes over bro's," "Which, before you read too much into it," "Is very boy-Friendly, just clothes-Friendlier." "Anyway, i attended the orientation," "So i took the liberty of drawing up a statement of my financial worth." "I think you'll be very pleased." "How old are you, brooke?" "Um, 22." "But i lead a rather accelerated lifestyle" "With the fashion line and the magazine." "And..." "I did read somewhere that 25 is the average age for women to " "Do you own your own home?" "Mm-Hmm." "Are you sexually active?" "Lately, no, but not for a lack of trying." "Sorry." "No." "Anyway, as i said," "I have my financial statements and a copy of my medical history," "A copy of my birth certificate " "And do you drink?" "Sorry?" "I noticed the bar." "Oh, um, some." "Not really." "The bar is more for my roommate." "And that would be peyton sawyer, correct?" "Mm-Hmm." "You should see her knock 'em back." "She's a champ." "I mean..." "The boy that she loves" "Recently almost married someone else and kind of went awol," "So, unlike me, who is perfectly stable and normal," "She's struggling a bit." "I guess that's what happens when you fall in love." "She can move out if it's a problem." "Peyton:" "my mom used to sing to me." "I don't think i've ever really told anybody that before." "It was " " It was like our little secret." "But..." "Every night, she'd come in, and she'd tuck me in," "And she'd sing me something like..." "Lullabies or..." "Album rock stuff." "And then," "After she was gone, i remember..." "Lying in bed for the first time and just feeling silence, you know..." "And then realizing that for the rest of my life, it was gone." "All her songs were gone," "And her voice, and the way it used to soothe me." "Just all of it." "So i guess i tried to find new songs to fill that quiet." "But none of them ever really have, you know?" "Now she's gone" "And mia's gone..." "And luke is gone." "It's just silence." "It's just silence" "Andy: you hear that?" "Do i hear what?" "Nothing." "Silence." "It's nice, huh?" "Yeah, i guess so." "Luke, you got to get her out of your head." "It's been a month, man." "You got to let it go." "Let it go?" "A month ago, i had my whole life ahead of me " "A second novel, basketball team," "And a girl i was gonna spend the rest of my life with." "Well, you still have all those things yet." "If i did, do you really think i would have spent the last four weeks at sea with you?" "Which brings me to this um..." "What are you doing out here?" "What do you mean?" "Well, i mean, it's not like we haven't loved having you, but..." "It's time for you to get back to your life." "And that all starts with a simple question." "What do you want?" "I want my family back." "And i want haley to trust me again." "I want her to look at me the way she used to" "And see a better man than maybe i'll ever be." "And then i want to be that man." "And i will be," "For her and for jamie." "I want to believe in nathan again." "And i want to believe in the goodness of people." "And i want my son to be safe," "And i want him to be great," "And i want that greatness to be seen and appreciated." "That's what i want." "I want to have a family." "I want to use my success to help a child" "Who maybe never really had a chance at all." "I want to be a mom." "And i'm ready to be one." "I believe that." "I want to believe in it all again " "Music and art, fate and love." "And i want to believe that i've made the right choices" "And that i'm on the right path" "And there's still time to fix the mistakes i've made." "And i guess i want hope." "And i want lucas." "I want lindsey." "I want her to be my wife, and..." "I just want to go back, you know?" "I want to go back to a month ago, when..." "We were happy and life had meaning and purpose and direction." "That's what i want." "Good" "Cause i have a way you can get all that." "Brooke:" "what did you write?" "Something good, i hope." "Sorry." "It's just that i kind of feel like i'm being judged, so..." "You're not being judged, brooke." "You're being evaluated." "It's to help clarify your reason of wanting to adopt" "And to explore your capabilities, maturity, and emotional readiness." "And does it take very long," "The whole decision-Ming process?" "No." "The home study is the last of it." "So i'll know if i'm gonna be a mom by the end of this meeting." "Essentially, yes." "Wow." "Well, how am i doing?" "Let's talk about your past." "Nathan: my problems with my past are of my own doing." "I'm stubborn, and i have a temper," "And i don't always make the best decisions." "It must have been very difficult for you," "Coming so close to the nba." "Do you think about that much?" "Sometimes." "Yeah." "I mean, sometimes, i wake up in the middle of the night," "And i walk through town," "Past the school, past the gym." "I can still hear the echoes, you know?" "You never told me that." "It's not something i'm all that proud of." "It's like " "Look, i'm not " " I'm not good with being vulnerable." "In fact, this is probably the closest i've come to it..." "Well, the second closest." "What was the first?" "When i was a junior in high school," "I took some...stuff to help me with my game " "Drugs " " And it was a stupid thing to do." "I ended up collapsing on the court," "And my father was all about," "You know, covering it up for the scouts." "Anyway, when i left the hospital," "I went to see haley," "Because i needed to know if she could forgive me." "I wanted to see if i still had the chance to be great in her eyes." "And when she did " "She forgave me " "That was the moment that everything changed for me." "That was the moment i fell in love with her," "This girl who could see past all the mistakes i've made." "I don't know." "I guess maybe sometimes i screw up" "Because i want to feel that again." "I suppose that sounds pretty broken." "You're not broken, luke." "You might think that you are, but " "Hey, you remember when i left your mom the first time" "To go back to new zealand?" "It was one of the hardest things i've ever had to do," "Because i still loved your mom, but..." "I knew there was a place in her heart that i would never occupy," "A place reserved for someone else." "Somehow, i just couldn't get past it." "Is this sounding familiar at all?" "Yeah." "Yeah, she said my heart was conflicted." "Well, here comes the good news." "There wasn't a day while we were apart" "That i wasn't completely in love with your mom." "And all it would have taken was for her to simply say," ""I love you, i miss you, and i need to be with you."" "I don't think it's that easy, andy." "Lucas, it is that easy." "Lindsey needs to be convinced that you love her." "And did i mention that i have a private jet" "And new york's not too far from here?" "No." "I tried calling her, andy," "And she didn't want to talk to me." "All right, well, tell me this much." "Has a day gone by since the wedding" "Where you haven't thought about her or wanted to see her," "Wanted her back?" "No." "Then you owe it to yourself to tell her that." "You owe it to lindsey, too." "Just trust me." "Over time, not knowing is way worse than to know." "Haley: i think not knowing is the hardest part " "Just not knowing what our marriage means to nathan," "If he still wants the same things out of our relationship that i want," "If he still finds me sexy, or if he still wants me." "How could you not know that?" "The name carrie comes to mind." "Why didn't you just tell me about the flirting?" "I don't know." "Did you like it?" "Maybe." "Maybe i just needed it." "Why, because i don't flirt with you after a long day of wrestling with high-School students and parenting our son?" "No, because you don't look at me like that anymore." "And i get it, yoknow." "I haven't been worthy of that look from you in a long time." "But, god, haley, i just -- I miss that." "Olivia:" "when was the first time you felt a sense of accomplishment, nathan?" "It was when i started playing basketball." "And the support of your father?" "When i started playing basketball." "And this year, all that stopped " "All the praise and adoration " "At least until your nanny started swimming naked." "It's not the craziest case of transference i've ever heard." "So, what, i need to start swimming naked for my husband's ego?" "No, you don't -- Haley," "This is not your fault." "It's not." "Why not swim naked?" "You could try it together." "It might be fun." "After all, you are 22." "Tell me something." "When was the last time the two of you did something really" "Young and foolish together?" "With all due respect," "We have been married nearly 6 years." "We have a son who's almost 5." "We don't get to be young." "Everyone gets to be young..." "Especially when you are." "Max: hey, i'm here about the car for sale." "It runs great, even though it's kind of...old." "My parents said i could finally get one." "Hi, max." "Hi, buddy." "Okay, for the first six months," "You're not to leave the state without notifying my office." "You must have a job or show an attempt at gainful employment" "At least twice a week." "Any legitimate employment is normally acceptable." "So, running for mayor again doesn't count?" "You may obtain help with problems" "Concerning employment, residence, finances, or other issues that often trouble a person" "Trying to adjust to life upon release from prison." "Take a look at that." "It's a good-Looking boy, huh?" "That's jamie." "That's my grandson." "You have kids?" "I'm your case manager." "This isn't "the view."" "I know." "I just thought you might appreciate a little small talk, get to know each other, you know?" "There's no small talk." "It's just i haven't spoken to too many people in a long time " "At least none that i haven't paid to listen." "This is the balance of what the state owes you" "For your work detail in prison and to help you get situated." "Count it, sign for it, and you can go." "$3,437." "750 bucks a year, huh?" "And they say crime doesn't pay." "How'd you like to make 3 grand for a little small talk?" "So, anyway, like i was saying," "He's a great kid." "Smart " " He's got his whole life ahead of him." "The other day, he looks up at me, and he says..." "They won't let me outside the fence." "Yeah, trust me, i know the feeling." "Can you really go to jail for not cleaning your room?" "No, but the guy next to me got 10 years for not eating his peas." "I don't believe you." "Good man." "How's my favorite guy?" "Okay, except uncle lucas is gone." "Well, i get a feeling he'll be coming back soon." "Your parents " " They good?" "Daddy came back home." "But he mostly sleeps on the couch again like before." "Yeah." "You know, i miss you, jamie." "I know." "I miss you, too." "Okay." "Well, i better get going before i start looking pervy." "What's pervy?" "Nothing you need to worry about." "Go ahead and play." "I'll see you again." "Okay." "Bye, grandpa." "Bye, buddy " " Hey..." "Remember, our secret." "Hey, kid." "You see that little boy?" "You mess with him, you answer to me." "You hear me?" "All right, pass it around." "Olivia:" "let's talk a little more about basketball, nathan." "I find it interesting that when you describe yourselves," "You describe being parents and spouses and siblings and friends." "But, nathan, you never once described yourself as a basketball player." "That's because i'm not anymore." "Why not?" "That's what happens when your spine gets crushed." "And the doctors definitively said you couldn't play?" "There's no such thing as definitively, but..." "Nobody's ever come back from something like this before." "But you're nathan scott." "I'm not that nathan scott." "And, haley, you never refer to yourself as a musician." "Uh, yeah." "Well, i haven't recorded in a really long time." "Why not?" "I had a son to raise, and nathan's accident." "And now?" "And now i still have a son to raise" "Because i haven't found a really unattractive nanny yet." "Look, i'm only as intelligent as the diplomas on my wall," "But here's a thought." "Maybe you aren't the people you fell in love with" "Because neither of you is trying to be the people you fell in love with." "Do you think you're ready to be a mother, brooke?" "Yes, i do." "Why?" "Because..." "Sometimes all a child needs to succeed is love " "Love from a parent who can provide" "A stable and caring environment, and i can do that." "And was your home life safe and caring?" "No." "Do you think you'll ever get married?" "I don't know." "If i met the right person, i suppose i would." "But you haven't met the right person yet." "Owen the bartender?" "Bar manager." "Chase adams, or lucas scott?" "Why'd you close the store?" "How long you been home?" "A few months." "And have you heard any new music?" "Yeah, a lot." "Didn't get it at my store, did you?" "Oh, oh." "Okay, i see." "It's my fault." "No, it's no one's fault." "I buy all my music online, too." "That's just the way it is." "Yeah, but the store really was a lot more than that." "I hope so." "I'd like to think it had something to do with this cool new record label." "This place is really awesome." "It's like the batcave in here." "Tell me you fight crime at night, like, secretly, in a leather cat suit." "Oh, my god!" "Max, you are the guy that lives at home, huh?" "You think about him much?" "Lucas?" "Every day." "Brooke: i don't understand what lucas scott has to do with my decision to adopt." "You said peyton was a mess" "Because the boy she loves recently almost married someone else." "You also had a relationship with him." "Oh, we dated in high school." "So what?" "So, lucas scott falls in love with someone else," "Peyton hits the bar," "And you decide to find love elsewhere." "By adopting?" "Look, i want to say this as politely as possible," "But that logic is awfully cynical," "Not to mention completely wrong." "It's just the timing seems a little questionable." "Well, i've been thinking about having a child since before i moved back to tree hill." "And i know that i'm young." "But i explained to you i have an accelerated life." "And on average, most women have their first child at the age of 25." "I looked it up." "Okay." "Let's move on." "Any drug use?" "I don't use drugs." "But in high school, didn't you run a campaign based on partying and promiscuity?" "I think this was around the time you were arrested for shoplifting." "I am not who i was in high school." "And you recently housed a drug addict named rachel gatina." "I would never let my child do drugs." "And i can't say that i know where you're getting all this information," "But i don't know how it affects my ability to be a good " "You spoke to my mother." "Have you spoken with peyton?" "Not since the wedding?" "No." "Jamie went missing." "Then i had to deal with dan,and..." "Then we left." "And the book, this whole comet business" "That lindsey was going on about at the altar?" "So peyton drives a frickin' comet." "What the hell?" "I mean, thank god the guy in the book didn't see a white bronco." "They'd all say i'm in love with o.J." "Man." "What kind of car does lindsey drive?" "Oh, that's not fair." "It is not fair that you spoke with my mother." "We always speak with applicants' families." "I understand that, but did mine tell you" "That she was just let go from my company?" "Yes, she did." "Sour grapes, don't you think?" "I think it's got to be pretty busy for you in the absence of your c.E.O." "I'm really not that busy." "That's 17, by the way." "That's 17 phone calls this afternoon." "A lot of them are e-Mails." "Brooke, we ask our adoptive families to take at least six months off" "To smooth the transition for the new children." "It's much easier in a two-Parent household." "Were you from a two-Parent household?" "My parents were divorced when i was 12." "I'm sorry to hear that." "But some of the best people that i know" "Are from single-Parent households." "Are you from a two-Parent household?" "Something tells me you already know the answer to that." "I'd like to hear it from you." "I'm from a no-Parent household." "My father cared a lot more about his golf score than he ever did about me," "And my mom went heavy on the scotch and prada." "The good news is that thanks to them, i know exactly" "What kind of parent i won't be." "I won't be an absentee parent." "If i have to sacrifice some things, then so be it." "Olivia:" "that's noble, haley." "But it also might be part of the problem." "You both have individual passions," "Individual gifts, individual dreams." "And you should, especially at your age." "Maybe if you spent a little more time" "Being selfish 22-Year-Olds," "You might love yourself a bit more" "And resent each other a bit less." "I don't resent haley or jamie." "I mean, they're the two best things that ever happened to me." "Yeah." "I agree with that." "We're the best things that ever happened to him." "No, i agree that nathan and jamie are the best and most important things that i have." "What about music?" "I asked nathan this before." "What was it like," "Hearing the cheers of enthusiastic, sold-Out crowds every night?" "Incredible." "It was humbling and wonderful." "But it took you away from nathan." "Yeah, we really struggled then." "I mean, i'm not avoiding music now" "Because i'm afraid that that's gonna happen again." "Good." "Leaving jamie out of all this," "Would you say those were your best days," "Where you were happiest with yourself?" "I wasn't proud of myself," "Because i knew nathan was hurting." "But personally, i guess i loved it, yeah." "What about you, nathan?" "Best days ever " "Playing basketball in front of thousands?" "The road trips sucked because i was away from haley and jamie," "But for me...yeah." "If you could have those days back," "Do you think you might do things differently " "Maybe treat each other a bit differently in the face of those dreams?" "Yeah." "Definitely." "Maybe you can." "Maybe you will." "I wish i could change some of the things" "About how i've acted in the last couple months." "I guess i'm just disappointed in myself." "You know, i told lucas that if he loved his fiancée," "Then i would learn to be okay with that" "Because i wanted him to be happy." "But..." "Really, i just wanted us to be happy " "Me and him." "Oh, and then when he didn't marry her," "I mean, i felt terrible for her" "And for him, you know?" "His heart is..." "Breaking right now, and..." "I come in here," "And i sit in silence and..." "Hear the echoes of who we used to be." "And so i wish for patience..." "And grace..." "And the strength to just let him be happy." "And mostly, i pray for the strength" "To not make his life worse 'cause of what i want." "That's the toughest part " "Letting go, you know?" "And that's the part of grace that really sucks." "Today for show and tell, i brought my bunny, chester." "Chester's my best friend ever." "My nanny carrie used to be my best friend," "But she tried to put stuff in my hair and take me away." "Now i guess it's a tie" "Between my uncle skills, my aunt brooke, and chester " "Oh, and my grandpa dan." "He brought me home." "You know how i got this scar, sam?" "I was helping my son nathan." "You see, family is important to me." "And didn't you go to prison for killing your brother?" "I've changed." "Come on, people don't change." "Take it from me -- Most of the people who walk through that door" "Walk right back into prison within a year's time." "That's not gonna happen to me." "Well, we'll see about that." "Scott." "I can't keep this." "My debt to society is square." "Donate it to charity " "Evil for good, right?" "Nice talk, sammy." "This wasn't a good talk, was it?" "I mean, i didn't pass, did i?" "You're not gonna recommend me?" "No, i am not going to recommend you for adoption, brooke." "I'm sorry." "But the truth is, is you are very young" "And you're single." "And i can't remember another case" "Where an applicant's mother said" "She'd make a terrible candidate." "Well, it's too bad nobody interviewed her before she had a kid, right?" "I'm sorry we can't help you." "You're not sorry." "But you should be." "Do you know what my mother said to me when i told her i wanted to start a company?" "She said, "your chances are one in a million."" "And i said, "maybe i'm that one."" "And she said, "you're not."" "And she was wrong." "And whatever she thought she saw in me was wrong..." "Because i am one in a million." "And there is a child out there who has something" "So special inside of them" "But whose life is miserable" "Because they think that nobody wants them." "And i could be a great mother to that child," "No matter their age or race or sex." "I could help them find what makes them special." "And if you can't see that, then you're wrong..." "Just like my mother." "Why don't you go ahead and write that down?" "Where's mama?" "Hey, sleepyhead." "She'll be back soon." "How'd you sleep?" "I had a dream about daddy." "Oh, yeah?" "Mm-Hmm." "And you were there." "And you were sad." "But daddy said everything's gonna be okay." "It's all gonna be okay." "I know that." "It's just some days are kind of messy, you know?" "Well, it's only life," "At least according to mia catalano." "You ever wonder where she'd be if you didn't decide to start this label?" "She would be fine." "Maybe not." "You changed her life, peyton." "So maybe that's why you came home " "In order to change the life of the next artist or the one after that..." "Maybe change your own life at the same time." "I think you're good here." "You just need a little patience." "Patience." "Time heals old wounds, huh?" "Time, music." "Let me ask you something." "When's the last time you got in that cool car of yours," "Turned up the stereo, and just drove?" "You might try that sometime " "Maybe find something there to heal that broken heart of yours." "Then again, i am -- 36 and still living at home?" "Yeah." "So what the hell do i know, right?" "Thanks." "Now, we're nearly out of time, so let's end this session as we have every week." "Haley, tell me some things you love about nathan." "I love that he's here with me every week without fail." "And i love that he holds himself accountable for his mistakes." "And i love that he's so protective over me and jamie." "And i love that shirt that he's wearing..." "And maybe the way he wears it." "Olivia: nathan?" "It's okay, really." "I'm not that great at taking a compliment." "Oh, well, we'll be working on that next week, then." "You two are going to be okay." "I really think so." "Thanks." "Can you pick up line one for me, please?" "Hi." "Well, i've been traveling with my mom since..." "Yeah, i talked to haley." "I'm glad jamie's okay." "Yeah." "Look, i know i owe you this," "But i'm not gonna publish it." "Luke." "Look, i know you promised your boss a second book out of me, but..." "I can't." "You have to." "They'll void your deal." "They'll make you pay back your advance." "And on top of that, it's too good not to publish." "I miss you." "I do." "Lindsey, i love you." "Every day i wake up, and i have this ache in my chest." "And sometimes i just sleep in because i know when i wake up," "You're not gonna be there." "I love you, too, luke." "You know that." "But i can't be with you." "It's okay." "I'll publish the book if you edit it." "Luke." "That's it." "That's my offer." "There'll be long nights, heated arguments." "It'll be like we're married." "I'll edit the book because i believe in it." "And i believe in you." "But we can't be together." "We will be." "One of these days, you're gonna wake up," "And you'll feel that same need in your heart, and you're gonna realize how much i love you." "And whenever that day is," "I'll still be waiting for you." "And you'll come home to me." "Hi!" "Hi, buddy." "Quiet around here without jamie." "Yeah." "He's with brooke." "Baby steps." "Yeah." "How you sleeping these days?" "So-So." "Jamie tosses around like a tasmanian devil." "He should probably get back to his own bed soon " "Separation thing." "Or he can sleep in the spare bedroom with me." "You know, sometimes i find your goodness staggering." "I didn't get a chance to tell you in the session, but..." "Your kindness is overwhelming, haley." "I mean, you saved my life." "If i haven't said it lately," "You're also sexy as hell." "Hey." "I was thinking, um..." "Not sleeping in this bed" "Might not be so bad tonight if you wanted to try it with me." "You got any more of that sexy talk?" "What, the kindness stuff or the sexy stuff?" "You have a serious ass, haley james." "Peyton: make a wish and place it in your heart." "Anything you want " "Everything you want." "Lucas: do you have it?" "Good." "Now believe it can come true." "You never know where the next miracle is gonna come from, the next smile," "The next wish come true." "Peyton: but if you believe that it's right around the corner..." "And you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it," "To the certainty of it..." "Brooke: you just might get the thing you're wishing for." "Nathan:" "the world is full of magic." "You just have to believe in it." "So make your wish." "Do you have it?" "Haley: good." "Now believe in it with all your heart."