"Okay, Michelle, it's time to go over to the big-girl wall..." " ...and see how much taller you are." " Yay!" "JOEY:" "Okay, up against the wall, young lady." "I'm very tall." "All right, Michelle." "Arms down." "Now stand up straight." "Okay." "Let's see." "Now you're cheating." "No tippy toes?" "No tippy toes." "Oh, nuts." "Okay, Michelle." "But look at this, it's good news." "You're half an inch taller!" " Yay!" " Yay!" "Big deal." "See you." "All right, bedtime, Michelle." "You got a big day tomorrow." "It's your first day of preschool." "I'm not sleepy." "Oh, yes, you are." "Now hop into bed." "Hop, hop, hop into bed." "Hey, Michelle, isn't this a pretty dress?" "Oh, it's beautiful, but I think you need that in a husky." "Let's go to school now!" "No, Michelle, where are you going?" "Preschool doesn't start until tomorrow." "If you go to school now, you'll be the only one there." "You could come too." "I need a ride." "Why don't the four of us mellow out Michelle with a little bedtime story about her first day at preschool?" " Great." " Okay." "What?" "Oh, no, no." "No, no, no." "I'm not the story guy." "I'm the dress guy." "See?" "I pick out dresses." "That's my specialty, that" "What am I bragging about?" "I'm in." "Okay, once upon a time, there was a beautiful little princess who went to Meadow Crest Preschool for the very first time." "And can you guess the name of the beautiful little princess?" "Miss Piggy." "No, Princess Michelle." "And when Princess Michelle opened the door she saw...." "A magic land of fun." "It was like Disneyland, with a nap." "And Princess Michelle made lots of new friends and they all played with their toys and then...." "What?" "Oh." "And then" " And then they played with their toys some more, and then...." "And then they all cleaned up the mess they made." "And then, Princess Michelle said:" ""My first day of preschool was the most wonderful day of my life."" "Awesome." "Okay, Miss One-Night- Away-From-Preschool." "Into bed." "Good night." " Good night, munchkin." " Good night." "Night." "I can't sleep." "This is nuts." "Five, six, seven eight, nine, 36, a hundred." "Ready or not, here I come." "Where are they hiding?" "I don't know." "I'm not behind this pointed-headed guy on the mushroom." "I know where Danny is." " I found you." " Oh, nuts." "This game is so hard." "I never win." "Ha-ha-ha-ha!" "Where are you?" "Ha-ha-ha-ha!" "I see you." "Ha, ha!" "You didn't find Cowboy Jesse!" "The princess is coming, the princess is coming!" "[IN UNISON] Yay!" " Hi, people." " Hi, Princess Michelle." "You're the prettiest princess in all the land." "You got it, dude." "Yay, yay!" "The princess is here!" "We love the princess!" "Her name is Michelle!" "Yay, yay." "Princess Michelle!" "I like that song." "Sing it again." "Yay, yay." "The princess is here!" "We love the princess!" "Her name is Michelle!" "Yay, yay." "Princess Michelle!" "Yay, yay." "Princess Michelle." "Wow, I love preschool." "I'm going now." "I need a car." "D.J., D.J., how come you're going to school so early?" "Because I am." "What kind of answer is that?" "The kind you get when I don't want to tell you something." "Are you meeting somebody?" "Is it Kevin?" "Is it Kimmy?" "Is it Kathy?" "Is it anyone who starts with a K?" "Here's what starts with a K:" "Keep your nose out of my business." "I gotta say it." "How rude!" "Michelle, what are you doing?" "Making lunch for preschool." "Michelle, come here a minute." "Let me take a look at you." "Michelle, your dress is on backwards." "Did you dress yourself this morning?" "Yes, I did." "And did you look in the mirror?" "Yes, I did." "And did you think you looked good?" "Yes, I did." "Well, here's a little fashion tip." "Walk backwards, and maybe no one will notice." "That's easy." "See you later." "Michelle...." "Comet, I think our friend D.J. is up to something." "Let's just take a little stroll over to her secret hiding place take a peek into her diary." "Just for fun." "Ah-ha." "Hey, there's a note on here." ""Dear Stephanie, if you read my diary this room will be all mine, because you will be living in the back yard."" "There must be something really juicy in here." "I'll just get the key from under Melvin's derby." "It's gone." "I can't believe she doesn't trust her own sister." "There's gotta be a way into this thing." "[GRUNTS]" "Comet, I just broke the lock on D.J.'s diary." "I've gotta fix this before D.J. gets home." "[KNOCKING ON DOOR]" "Ah!" "Hey, Steph." "You ready?" " Where are we going?" " Oh, I don't know." "Paris, Rome, school." "School?" "Oh, yeah." "I go there." "Comet, what are you chewing on?" "Give me that, give me that, give me that, right" "Oh, gosh, doggy drool." "This is D.J.'s diary." "You better put it back in her secret hiding place." "I think it's in the pillowcase this week, isn't it?" "Right." "Comet, you rascal." "MICHELLE:" "Come on, Daddy." " Oh, Michelle, here we go." "Another major milestone in your life, your first day of preschool." "Come on, Daddy." "Don't worry, you're gonna have lots of fun and make new friends." "Come on, Daddy." "You know, I'll never forget my first day of preschool...." "Bye, Daddy." "Michelle, honey, wait for me." " Hi, Miss Petrie." " Hello, Mr. Tanner." "Michelle, I'd like you to meet your teacher, Miss Petrie." "Well, hi there." "Nice to meet you." "Nice to meet you too." "Boys and girls." "Let's say hi to our new friend Michelle." "Hi, Michelle." "Hi, people." "I'm the king." "Michelle, this is Aaron." "Aaron gets to wear the sharing crown because he shared his toys today." "Want to see Dave?" "Okay." "Who's Dave?" " The birdie." " Dave is our class pet." "He's right over there." "Go say hello." "Well, I guess I'll just hang out here today." "Well, Michelle seems to be adjusting very quickly." "But if it makes you feel better, you're welcome to stay and have cookies." "I'll check with Michelle." "Michelle, honey?" "Do you want Daddy to stay here with you today?" "Go home." "I'm a big girl." "Okay, then I'm gonna come and pick you up as soon as school's over, okay?" " Okay." " Okay." "Drive safely." "Thanks, honey." "So, what do I do now?" "I cleared my whole day for this." "Oh, that's really not your problem, is it?" "We'll see you in a couple of hours, Mr. Tanner." "Thanks." "I know!" "I can wax the kitchen floor." "All right!" "Yeah." "Okay, boys and girls, let's meet on the magic carpet for story time." "Come on, all right, everybody." "Hi, Dave." "You're a pretty birdie." "Ready for a story, boys and girls?" " Yeah." " Come on, it's story time." "Miss Petrie, Dave flew out the window." "Michelle did it!" "Well, it was just an accident." "I'm sure Michelle didn't mean to do it." "I'm sorry, I'm a bad girl." "A very bad girl." "I'm a very bad girl." "Dave, come back." "Where are you?" "Yo, Dave, if you're out there, come back, give the kid a break, huh?" "You should've seen Michelle in preschool today." "No other kids would play with her." "She sat in a corner all by herself saying:" ""I'm a bad girl."" "Dave!" "Dave, the bread is yummy!" "Guys, we gotta do something here." "Jesse, come with me." "Joey, please pick up this bread." "[WHISTLES LIKE BIRD]" "There, that should hold it." "Uh-oh." "They should put a warning on this glue." "Oh, they did." "Hey, Steph, what's going on?" "Oh, nothing." "Nothing at all." "Just another day full of nothing here in my room." "You know, I was thinking, we never hang out like we used to." "So you wanna go to the mall with me?" "This is cool!" "This is rad!" "This is a real bad time." "I am bushed." "Hi." "I'm taking Michelle for ice cream." "Who wants to come?" "I do not." "Thanks, Joey, but I'm going to the mall." "She's acting very strange." "Even for her." "Steph, what are you hiding under the pillow?" "Nothing, see, nothing at all." "Nothing." "Hey, how'd this get here?" "Steph, give me D.J.'s diary." "Heh-heh-heh-heh." "Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha." "Heh-heh-heh." "Ha-ha-ha-ha." "You're in big trouble." "Go find Dave." "Fly away." "You're no help." " Guess what, Michelle?" " We got you a new birdie friend." "That is not Dave." "This is Sammy." "Say hi to Sammy." "Hi, Sammy." "Where is Dave?" "All the kids are gonna love Sammy when you bring him to preschool tomorrow." "I'm not going to preschool." "Oh, yes you are, honey." "No way, Jose." "No one likes me." "Whoa, whoa, whoa." "Hold it there, ankle biter." "Now, we love you very, very much." "If you don't want to go to preschool, you don't have to go to preschool, okay?" "Thank you!" "All right." "There you go." " No more school!" " Daniel, problem solved." "No." "Problem made worse." "Jesse, Michelle has to go to preschool." "How can you send her back?" "The kids don't like her." "Look, I know you just want to protect her but we can't be by her side 24 hours a day just to stop every bad thing that might happen." "We have to help her get through this, not run away from it." "I know what the kid's going through." "In kindergarten, I was the goldfish monitor." "Part of my job was to take the goldfish home for the weekend." "I learned an important lesson." "When taking a goldfish home, take the bowl with you." " You killed the kindergarten goldfish?" " Hey, back off, man." "I'm still trying to get over it." "To this day, I can't eat sushi." "What happened?" "My parents made me go back to school and the kids teased me." "They called me fish-hater." "Ooh." "Brutal." "Well, how long did this go on?" "Well, actually, it went on until show-and-tell." "Oh, yeah." "Luckily, Barry Fox brought in his toenail collection, and the kids turned on him." "I suppose you were right and I was wrong." "Okay, she should go back to school." "And who better to tell her than the man that was right?" "Congratulations, Daddy." "Thanks." "Thanks, Joey, you saved my life." "When you break something you're not supposed to touch be very careful with this Permaglue." "Because as you know this could happen." "Joey!" "What are you doing with my diary?" "Ouch!" "Well, nice seeing you all again." "Steph, isn't there something you'd like to say to D.J. about her diary?" "Yes, there is." "D.J., Joey did not steal your diary." "Michelle did." "[CLEARS THROAT]" "Maybe it was me." "You know how I am with names." "Joey, may I have a word alone with my nosy sister?" " Sure." " Joey, don't go." "Steph, I have to go." "I really wish I hadn't done that." "Sit." "I am not gonna yell at you." "I'm just gonna talk in a very firm voice for a very long time." "Now, why are you always snooping around in my stuff?" "I can't help it." "You fascinate me." "Listen, you have no business to" "I fascinate you?" "Of course you do." "You go to school dances you have seven different teachers in the same day and you carry a purse." "You're a woman of the world." "True." "But I still need my privacy." "I tell you what." "If you really promise that my diary is off-limits I'll try to tell you more about my fascinating life." "I promise." "Forgive me?" "I guess so." "Besides, I keep my really hot stories in my journal." "You have a journal?" "Where is it?" "What does it look like?" "What's in it?" "Michelle, you wait right here." "I'm gonna talk to the other boys and girls." "You stay with me all day." "I promise I won't leave unless you say it's all right." "Thank you very much." "You're welcome." "Now, you stay right here where I can see you." " Hi, Miss Petrie." " Oh, hello, Mr. Tanner." "Boys and girls, Michelle's daddy wants to talk to you." " They're all ears." " Thanks." " Hi, kids." " Hi." "I'm Danny Tanner." "I have my own talk show, Wake Up, San Francisco." "Well, we are on opposite Sesame Street." "Guess that's why you're so impressed." "My sweet little girl Michelle has brought someone for you to keep here at the preschool because she likes you all so very much." "Come on in, Michelle." "CHILDREN:" "A birdie." "Now, talk to the boys and girls." "This is Sammy, and he's a nice birdie." "I give him to the preschool." "Michelle, that's very generous." "Why don't we thank Michelle by clapping our hands." "CHILDREN:" "Thank you, Michelle." "See, honey?" "All your new friends are saying thank you very much." "Welcome very much." "Everyone, come say hi to our new birdie." "Here, Michelle." "You can wear the sharing crown." "Thank you." "Daddy, I'm a princess." "Yes, you are, Michelle." "You're my little princess." "Sweetheart, I am very proud of you for being so brave and coming to preschool." "Do you want me to stay with you today?" "No, thank you." "They like me now." "I think you're going to have a real good time here in preschool." "I like being a big girl." "Go play with your new friends now, honey." "You okay?" "Yeah, I'll be fine." "But if she's ever crowned Miss America I'll be crying like a baby." "People, don't open that door." "Remember?" "Subtitles by SDI Media Group" "[ENGLISH SDH]"