"You gonna get up today, Hannah?" "What's this?" "That's orange juice, Hannah." "Don't ya know I'm allergic to orange juice?" "Is that on your chart?" "How the hell should I know?" "It should be." "You're sure you're allergic to orange juice?" "Well, better safe than sorry I always say." "Let's getcha a little milk instead." "We go through this every other week, it's always news to her." "Wouldn't you like to get dressed today and eat with the others?" "I wanna see Rachel." "Hannah, Rachel's very sick." "I know she's sick, goddammit." "Only her family can see her." "I'm family!" "Don't get yourself all ruffled." "I'll have to give you something." "You know your blood pressure." "You tell Marge I wanna see her mother." "All right, I'll tell her." "But I told her day before yesterday and she said no;" "it would just upset you both." "Rachel's gonna die alone!" "Her daughter comes to see her every day." "But Rachel needs to see me." "She must be an old friend, isn't she?" "Friend doesn't even say it." "Please..." "You could dress and powder me..." "I'll go sit with those basket cases down the hall if you'll just let me see her." "You let the nurse's aide dress you." "You have a good lunch, then we'll see." "It'd mean a lot to both of us." "Well, that's what we want." "That's what we're here for." "Can you imagine?" "Doing that for a living?" "She'll end up in here herself when she's 80." "At least this room's got a view and a window that opens." "The freight train goes by at two every morning..." "I listen for it." "I'd kill myself if all I could see was parking lot." "I wonder if you can hear the train?" "You guys are getting real good at this." "Good morning, Hannah!" "Oh, you have got some mail this morning!" "Oh, I know I saw something in here somewhere..." "Oh, there it is!" "It's a postcard from Alaska." "Oh, look at the size of that fish." "It's a... it's a..." "Halibut." "Oh, it's a halibut." "Look!" "356 pounds!" "How would you even catch something like that, huh?" "How would you like to go swimmin' and see something like that in the water with you, huh?" "No thanks." "So would you like me to read it to you, hon?" "I'll just read it to you like I usually do, okay." "It says, "Hey, Hannah." "The mud got another one." "Love and regards, Nettie Bobo."" "What on earth does that mean?" "Do you have any idea what that means, huh?" "Well, I'm sorry, honey I have just got to go." "But I'll see you tomorrow." "That's some fish." "My hubby would sell his soul to hook into a fish like that." "Alaska." "How do you know someone in Alaska?" "It's people like that drive me nuts." "Trap us like rats and then talk us to death." "I can't just walk away like I used to." "I didn't like somethin', off I'd go." "That's how I ended up in Alaska." "No roads." "Everybody flew." "I flew over that tundra like it was my backyard." "Nettie's still there..." "82, canoes to work." "Digs tourists out of the mud flats." "They sink down in that ooze and stick like cement." "I loved it there... but I had to come back." "I always had to come back..." "For Rachel." "She'd never leave Michigan." "Had the kids." "Peaches to can and pies to bake." "She looked like someone dipped her in flour." "She looked like Mt." "McKinley." "I like that - being compared to a mountain." "It was a compliment." "You were gone so long that time" "I thought you were never coming back." "You got married." "To escape my father's temper, not you." "I had to get out." "And girls are supposed to marry." "Well, at least I married the dullest man I could find." "Yeah, well, he was a good provider, but you'd have been trapped for the rest of your life." "If Mr. Johnson hadn't had the misfortune of dying on that excursion boat." "Everyone ran to the side to wave goodbye and the boat capsized." "Never marry a weak swimmer." "You waited months to write, till after the twins were born." "You tried to mourn him, but it was always me you wanted to cook for." "Don't be smug." "You always thought we were the only girls who did what we did." "Whenever and wherever we could." "Of course after it was over, you'd ask me to leave and you'd go back to your Bible." "Never seemed to be on my side." "Neither was your family." "They still aren't." "Your daughter sits with you for hours but she won't let me see you." "Has the nerve to tell me it's for my own good." "I'd like to look at you just once and die." "Be a nice way to go." "Isn't this a switch." "For once you're staying in one place and I'm the one leaving." "I had to go." "I had to see things." "Oh, Alaska, New Mexico, Paris." "My Lord, even Ohio." "Now why Ohio?" "It's Michigan, only flat." "Some of Ohio is very pretty." "You've just never seen it." "Every once in a while you just had to leave me." "You knew I'd be wild for you when you finally got back." "I've been everywhere..." "Even South America." "That's where I found the seeds for your moonflowers." "Mr. Johnson... used to walk around with his eyes down on the ground, like he was looking for lost change." "He wouldn't know a moonflower from a lilac bush." "What do wives find to talk about with their husbands?" "Mr. Johnson and I ran out of conversation in less than two years." "You and I never did." "Nope." "Sometimes we'd sit in the yard and watch your moonflowers come out;" "they'd unfold in seconds, just blooming' in the night." "Then later in the night I'd call you my moonflower... when I was pressed up under your nightgown." "And by morning the moonflowers had shriveled and you had your hairnet back on." "How was I supposed to cook breakfast without my hairnet?" "You have the most beautiful hair." "Oh, Hannah." "Don't start something we can't finish." "Hello, Hannah!" "Jesus, Marge, I can hear!" "I just can't walk or see worth a shit." "The nurse says you've been wanting to see Mom." "Of course I have." "We can't have you upsetting her." "Upset?" "!" "Wh..." "When did I ever upset your mother?" "All her life." "Well, if that's the case, it was her choice." "Marge, please let me see her." "We need to see each other." "This is no way for us to end our lives - in two separate rooms." "She has her family." "I'm her family!" "Please." "Don't." "I used to tuck you in!" "I told you stories." "I sat with you when there were storms." "You never knew your father, but you knew me." "You knew I'd always look after you." "When you weren't busy..." "Going to Alaska or New Mexico." "I sent you postcards." "I sent you presents." "I sent your mother money." "Don't act like you were there for Mom." "You weren't." "We were!" "Roy and I were there!" "Dammit, you were children." "You had to be there!" "Hannah, I grew up a long time ago." "I lost my Barbara, my daughter, in a car accident." "I have grown grandchildren." "I cook, I clean, I can peaches." "I recycle my newspapers." "And once a year we drive to the Mackinac Bridge and I have a little piece of fudge by the water." "And then we drive home." "And I mow the lawn." "But when Mom needs me, I come." "You always came when you darn well pleased." "You don't know anything about it." "I will tell Mom you asked after her." "She was a cute little girl, but she's been a pain in the ass ever since she joined the Baptist Church." "Hi." "Are you Grandma Hannah?" "What?" "!" "The nurse told me" "I should speak with 'Grandma Hannah' about my project for school." "Grandma Hannah?" "Jesus Christ, don't call me that." "Sorry, she must have... uh..." "What?" "Women's Suffrage?" "The Civil War?" "What is it you want my sage advice about?" "I'm busy." "The Depression." "I went to Alaska." "Caught everything I ate except chocolate." "Are you writing it down?" "I voted for Roosevelt because I liked Eleanor." "The war broke out, I lied about my age," "I joined the WACS, and I flew planes." "I invested in computer stocks in the 50s." "That's how come a Depression rat like me can afford this beauteous single room in Hotel Hell." "That's it." "Posterity." "You get asked this a lot." "They send all you in here." "Perk me up." "What in the hell do you think I am - the public library?" "Go ask your parents what it was like getting raised in the 60s." "My parents are dead." "Well, so are mine." "Please, take me home!" "Please, take me home!" "Mama!" "Mama!" "Mama!" "What an awful place." "Always have a gun handy to shoot yourself in case you fall off a goddamned roof." "In Alaska if I'd fell off a roof a bear woulda ate me and made some use out of me." "Sit down." "You've been to Alaska?" "I lived in Alaska." "Look at this..." "From a friend of mine who's still livin' up there." "Lord, now you're robbing the cradle." "And I thought I'd seen it all." "Nonsense." "Living in Alaska's nonsense?" "Nah, I'm just mumbling to myself." "Old people do that." "No, Alaska was great." "I was real happy living there." "How'd you survive?" "Had a high school diploma." "Taught school in Barrow." "Skinned things." "You get by." "You just went and did it?" "Most people dream and stay home." "There is nothing wrong with staying home." "I'd really like to go to Africa, but I'm afraid if I need a blood transfusion..." "Why?" "You sick?" "No." "So don't get sick." "The blood supply in Africa is so tainted with AIDS." "What if something did happen?" "God forbid something should happen." "Trust me, kid, you can 'what if' yourself into a real boring life." "I really don't care to listen to this." "You call this something?" "I went to your wedding!" "What?" "She's being ridiculous." "Uh... nothin'." "Forget it." "So you married?" "Nope." "It's hard to tell." "I wonder..." "Girls used to wear pinky rings and men's socks." "How old are you?" "Twenty-one." "Maybe she doesn't know, but I sure knew by then." "Have you ever been married?" "Not to a man." "Oh, yeah?" "You gonna put that in your paper?" "Maybe." "Is she dead?" "Almost." "They got her in some other wing in this dump." "They won't let me see her." "She's in a coma, they still won't let me see her." "Trying to protect us from each other." "People were always doing that." "Is she who you talk to?" "I can't go to her, so I bring her to me." "And she comes on her own." "I still talk to my parents..." "especially when I can't sleep." "You're the only person I've told." "Well, I'm pretty damn safe." "I won't tell." "They died last year." "Car accident." "Rachel's been in a coma a while..." "Stroke." "I was in the hospital all busted up or I woulda taken care of her." "And now her damn daughter..." "That's her legal family, you know, so, anyway, here I sit." "And Rachel's right here in this nursing home?" "Beats the hell out of me what they think I'm gonna do to her." "I just..." "I wanted to say goodbye." "Her daughter's with her all the time?" "Well, she goes home at night." "God, I'm just so afraid that she's gonna die alone." "Late at night." "That'd be her way, slip out real quiet-like." "But if it was up to her, she'd want me there." "Don't be too sure." "You're so funny." "She's being funny." "A nurse told me that people can visit 24 hours a day if they want." "Nobody wants to." "But they can." "I mean, I could." "Could come by at three in the morning, swing by your room, visiting you." "Take you for a stroll to Rachel's room..." "You mean that?" "Um..." "You'd have to help me into my chair." "Is your back strong?" "Don't worry about it." "I play softball and basketball." "Uh huh." "So it's no problem." "Good." "Because she could go in a year, or she could go tonight." "And I don't wanna miss her." "Then let's go tonight." "Three o'clock sound good?" "Yeah." "How come you're goin' outta your way for me, kid?" "I don't know." "Maybe so somebody'll help me out when I'm old." "Yeah, don't count on it." "You seen my horses?" "Nope." "Got nothin' in here but goats." "You might want to check the TV room down the hall." "I'll just do that." "How the hell they got outta the barn, that's what I wanna know." "This way?" "Turn left at the drinking fountain." "See ya around, toots." "He a regular?" "Never seen him before." "At least he's got all his parts." "It's those diabetics with stumps for legs that depress the hell out of me." "Especially when I knew 'em before, you know." "Some of these kids are from school." "Is there anything you need?" "Anything I can bring you tonight?" "Just Rachel." "Three o'clock." "Thanks, kiddo." "That's not the first time you've waved somebody under my nose." "That missionary... followed you all the way from Brazil." "Do I have to hear about her again?" "I mean it's ancient history." "Clean food and American toilets is what looked good to her, not me." "Everything she ate down there gave her the runs." "Why do you have to give every little detail?" "You always were one to pull the curtains." "Some things are private." "You mean hidden..." "Pretending." "Your dead husband's photograph on the mantel and flowers on his grave on Decoration Day." "And there you were with all the good widows at the cemetery." "Then you'd come back home and hop back in bed with me." "I can't talk to you." "You sure used to." "I'm going back to my room." "Fine." "Used to be we'd make up by doing the deed." "I'd stay after you until I had all your clothes off." "Don't you dare follow me." "Baby, I'll only be in Brazil for a month, and the money is good." "My God..." "A whole month without your apple pie." "A month without the smell of your hair." "A month without your eyes..." "Shut up." "I'm still mad at you." "I know." "I still feel it." "I want you just like I always did." "Not the way I am now, plugged in like a lamp." "Well, it's that time again, Hannah." "Let's put you on the toilet." "But I haven't eaten anything." "I don't need cleaning out if I haven't eaten anything." "You know we do it every three days." "It's on your chart." "But I'm not bound up, dammit." "Well, that's thanks to this." "My body's gonna forget how to shit on its own if you keep shoving that up me." "Just leave me alone." "Hannah, we don't want to have to restrain you." "Just try it." "Doctor knows what's best for you." "I haven't seen that little asshole in three months." "How does he know what I need?" "Look, I don't get paid a fortune for doing this." "I've got enough on my plate without having to argue with you." "I don't have the time." "There's more to taking care of people than reaming them out every other day." "Don't I have any rights?" "There's endless beauty in Alaska, Rachel, but some days it's almost too much." "I want beauty I can hold..." "You." "The bald eagles are just like everything else here - bigger than you can imagine." "And the mountains grow like wildflowers." "It'd be heaven on earth if you were here." "Rachel, what's so wrong with wanting to see the world?" "I can't spend my life lookin' out just one window." "But mountains, eagles, Broadway marquees - what's any of that when I hold it up to you?" "Well, I gotta sign off." "This is gonna cost me an arm and a leg in postage as it is." "I wish you'd write." "A penny postcard, something?" "Don't stay mad." "Please..." "I had to leave." "I couldn't stay there and see you with him." "I love you, Rachel, I truly do." "And I wish you well." "Think of me sometimes..." "Your old friend, Hannah Free." "Hannah, wake up." "It's time to go see Rachel." "I found her room." "The coast is clear." "Let me just get your wheelchair." "Uh, do you have to go to the bathroom?" "I'm sorry, yes, I do." "I always have to go when I wake up." "No big deal." "Do you use a bedpan?" "No!" "Don't you let her go in that bathroom with you." "Get a grip on yourself." "Get a grip on me;" "Let me help you up." "I can't believe I'm finally gonna get to see her." "Don't wake me." "I'm sleeping soundly." "We'll be quiet." "What?" "Ghost." "Don't call me a ghost." "These aren't my slippers." "Yeah." "Bought you a new pair." "What, are you adopting me?" "Maybe." "You are hard up." "Lean on me." "Bring the chair." "I can do it, I can get in." "You're always so darn independent." "Always so damn independent?" "Right here." "Lock the wheels." "I appreciate this." "Dammit, Linda!" "Dammit, Linda!" "I'll just be here, out of the way." "God, you could run a farm on all this fuckin' machinery." "All these goddamn tubes." "Poor kid." "You go ahead and sleep, Rachel." "I just wanna be here." "We were together all our lives." "Together and apart..." "Right, Rach?" "It's just that I've never seen her look unattractive at all in some... in makeup." "And I said, I said..." "Oh, bring your husband..." "Gimme, gimme!" "Hannah!" "You're in the wrong room." "No, I'm not." "Look, Hannah, you should be asleep." "You're gonna get yourself sick." "How in the world did you get yourself in here?" "I drove." "Hannah, you know how her family feels." "I'm her family." "Let's take you back to your room." "No!" "What is the harm?" "Rachel should not be here alone, not now, not just before dawn." "That's the soul's midnight." "And that's the time all us old folks die." "Trust me, people die all day long." "Please let me stay." "I'm sorry, hon, but you're not supposed to be in here." "Let's wheel you back to your room." " No!" " Hannah..." "No!" "Hannah, you are not the only person in this home." "I've gotta get back to the desk." " You come with me." " Leave me alone!" "This is my great grandma." "I brought Hannah here tonight." "I take full responsibility." "I haven't seen you before." "I flew in a couple days ago." "Now look." "This is Grandma Rachel's best friend." "Of course she should be here." "It's a funny time of night to come visiting." "It gives them more privacy." "Why don't you just go on back to your desk." "Well, maybe for another 15 minutes, then you take her back to her room." "I don't wanna find her in here when I check again at... 3:45." "I'll take her back at dawn." "She's not hurting anyone." "Oh, all right." "I guess she's not." "But if that daughter of hers comes before Hannah's gone," "I didn't see either one of you." " Deal." " Okay." "What a load of bull." "I think I'm rubbin' off on ya." "I hope so." "Did ya hear that, Rachel?" "I get to stay." "This is Marge." "I want to make sure that..." "King me." "Okay..." "Hannah, I'll check in with you later, okay?" "That Greta..." "she reminds me of somebody." "I'm not lookin' at her." "Even the squirrels move slow around here." "Pretty day." "Yes, sir, I was in the CCC." "We planted rows and rows of trees." "Lots of discipline..." "Good preparation for WW II." "And what did you do after the war ended?" "Whaddya mean 'ended'?" "Oh." "Say, aren't you Betty Grable?" "Greta?" "Why, I had no idea you were in town." "Nope." "Weren't you gonna stop by?" "Wasn't planning to." "Are you a friend of Betty's?" "Betty?" "Betty Grable." "Uh, sir, I would like you to meet Tallulah Bankhead." "I'm sure that's some kind of insult." "What kind of a name is Tallulah?" "What are you doing here?" "Same thing you are - visiting." "Well, that's nice, I guess." "If you won't spend time with me, at least you're visiting Mom." "I enjoyed talking with you." "Have you seen my horses?" "No!" "Maybe you should check down the hall?" "Much obliged." "Save me a dance, eh?" "Well, how long are you gonna be in town?" "As long as I want." "Must you be so rude?" "Yes, I think I must." "I messed up with your mom." "I wish I could do it over." "That's something." "Please stop by for lunch some day." "I'll think about it." "Maybe I'll even bring my lover." "She likes a good lunch." "Oh, is this some kind of test?" "It's just the truth." "Why am I not surprised?" "Yeah, why aren't you?" "You just knew I was gonna turn out bad, huh?" "I didn't mean..." "I need to, uh..." "make sure they turn Mom." "I don't think they do it often enough." "Marge?" "Grandma?" "Yes?" "Make sure you're not doing it again... screwing things up between Great Grandma and Hannah." "I don't know what you mean." "I'll bet you don't." "It's sad, it's really sad." "It's not the same thing." "It's not the same thing at all!" "Can you believe Katie got in trouble again?" "I'm not that surprised." "She gets in trouble a lot." "We better not." "There." "Don't do that." "Don't wipe away my kisses." "You want me to go get Dewey Russell?" "You wanna kiss him?" "I don't want to kiss anybody." "So it's not just me?" "Especially not you, Hannah." "Rachel!" "If you don't feel funny about this, why are we in this chicken coop?" "I'm shy." "Don't laugh at me." "I wasn't laughing at you." "It's just you make me nervous... like you're gonna kiss me again." "Do ya want me to?" "No..." "Yes." "Oh, my." "You liked it?" "Why aren't you a boy?" "Do you really want me to be a boy?" "No..." "You kiss me this time." "I have to go." "I have chores to do." "Meet me here Saturday." "We're going into town for supplies." "How 'bout Sunday after church?" "I can't do this on a Sunday!" "Monday after school?" "All right." "But just for one kiss." "# Rachel, Rachel #" "# Give me your answer do #" "One, two." "You're gonna be awake all night, drinking coffee." "Oops!" "I'm sorry." "More mail." "My, you are popular." "You get more mail than all the other people in this place put together." "That's pretty damn sad." "Hmm..." "Hallmark?" "That's for me to know." "You look very tired today, Hannah." "Couldn't you sleep last night?" "Now if your eyes are tired," "I'd be very happy to read that..." "I can still read!" "Well, would you like to buy some stamps?" "I haven't any money up here." "Yes, you do." "Your little friend left $20 next to the front desk so you could buy yourself some little extras." "You want me to get you a pop from the machine?" "Guess not." "Well, the offer stands." "I'll be back tomorrow." "You are always gettin' somethin'." "I suppose there are some people who think she means well." "Wars break out every other week 'cause of some asshole who means well." "What do you think?" "You think anyone in here knows you're gonna be my lady tonight?" ""My Lady." Wow..." "Unbelievable." "So... who's that from?" "Friend." "New Mexico?" "Yes, and don't get all agitated." "Look at me." "One minute... thirty seconds..." "I'm going back to my room." "No, wait, wait, wait." "I'm paying... attention." "Your mind's in New Mexico." "She's just an old friend." "I'm sure after all those years working at Los Alamos she glows in the dark." "Don't tell me how that woman glows in the dark." "When I'm gone, you'll probably conjure her up for company." "Her life is full." "You like that about her." "Yes." "Honey, you don't have to envy her." "She was no match for you." "You always said she was witty." "So are you." "Why doesn't she visit you?" "I'm sure that Jackie wants to remember me the way I was." "I guess I would, too." "I don't want to see me in her eyes." "So..." "Are you coming tonight?" "Hope so." "That girl's bringing you?" "It's the only way I can get there." "Why is she helping you?" "Because I'm just so fascinating she can't resist." "Oh, speak of the devil." " Hi." " Hey!" "I was here earlier, but you were napping." "I'm surprised you're out of bed." "I'll have you know I've been up here roaming the halls." "Wow, kid, you really know how to have a good time." "So how are you?" "Tired..." "And grateful." "No problem." "I left you a little money at the front desk." "Now you've got them tipping you." "I hope you don't mind." "I just know that you can't keep money up here in your room or else it might get stolen, so this way you can treat yourself to something." "She is thoughtful." "Well, thanks, kid." "I don't want anything." "Not even a stamp?" "Pair of shoelaces?" "A magazine?" "Read?" "Tie a shoe?" "God it makes me tired just to think about it." "I had so much energy, but I squandered it." "Now my body parts are all worn out." "But I'm still here." "Got my hands, my heart, my mind..." "I'm refining myself down to the essentials." "So we goin' on vacation again tonight?" " You willing?" " I am askin'." " Three o'clock?" " I'll be here." "Thanks." "It's all right." "Hey..." "I wanna give you something." "I thought of what you might like." "Just keep your clothes on, Hannah." "In there." "It's my journals." "You'll find the Depression in there someplace." "You mean it?" "You'd let me read 'em?" "I can quote from 'em?" "I thought somebody should get some good out of 'em." "I'll try to skip over all the personal stuff." "It's all right." "If you can read my handwriting, honey, you're welcome to 'em." "So there you go." "Maybe you'll learn something." "I bet I will." "I bet she will." "See you tonight." "It's a date." "It's a date." "Aren't you just the nursing home Romeo." "Well, she is pretty cute." "Something 'bout the way she walks reminds me of you." "You have such a great ass." "Is that why you couldn't keep your hands off of it?" "Near death has really brought out your racy side." "You old flirt." "You never let me read those." "You're in 'em." "I hope you were kind." "Not always..." "They're not just journals." "I wrote a novel when I was snowed in." "Beat alcoholism." "Am I in that too?" "I think you'll recognize yourself." "Why'd you give them to her?" "I want somebody to know I was here." "Well, I know." "I want somebody to know you were here too." "The real you - not the you smiling at church bake sales." "I wanted people to know about us... who's not afraid of what 'us' means." "I want somebody to know that I took you to bed..." "and I loved you." "We know." "Yeah, but what about posterity?" "Posterity?" "Yeah." "Good Lord, what next?" "Well?" "Well what?" "What are you doin' in here?" "Isn't this my room?" "No!" "You old men are in the basement." "Go ask the nurse to show ya." "I'm lost." "I know you're lost." "Ask the nurse to take you to your room." "Do I know you?" "I wish I had a picture of you when you were younger." "What's your name?" "You wanna take a guess?" "No." "Well, then tell me who you are." "How soon do ya have to know?" "Here you are." "He never knows where his room is." "Come on, let's get you back to your room." "I know you." "Not anymore you don't." "Your friend, she don't talk much." "You should take a nap." "Your little friend will be waking you up before you know it." "I used to wake you up." "I'd wake up and my nightgown would be unbuttoned." "Honey, it's light out." "I've gotta get up." "It's cold outside the covers." "Gotta feed the chickens, make breakfast for the kids..." "I'll feed the chickens." "Take your long johns off." "You first." "It is cold." "I hope that's not in those books you gave that girl." "I wonder if she has a little girlfriend." "I'll bet you anything that she's just like us." "I never could convince you that we weren't the only ones." "You never thought what we did was right." "Don't be silly." "Didn't we sit on my front porch holding hands, watching the sunset?" "Maybe not when we were 30, but when we were 60." "Well, then they just thought we were a couple of cute old ladies." "No one ever thought you were cute." "Everyone in this town knows what you are, Hannah, so they know about me too." "I sat there knowing full well" "I was hanging out my bed sheets." "It meant so much to you that I finally just let go of my privacy." "And let people, family, neighbors... know exactly who I am." "Now..." "You show me somebody in one of your magazines from California that does that." "I stood my ground, lived my life, and I loved you... despite everything I was brought up to believe." "I'm tired." "So am I." "I wish we could take a nap together." "I'll be there." "Quiet around without them." "I'm sure they're having a great time camping with the Wilsons, mosquitos and all." "The Wilsons are a little churchy for me." "I suppose you want me to find some heathens to take my children camping." "Might be more fun." "Ohhh!" "It's almost time for Arthur Godfrey." "You want me to turn it on for you?" "He makes you fall asleep." "I need my rest." "Mmm... that's good." "I already pulled the shades." "You keep after me to write you more than three sentences." "It took me half an hour to find a pencil, but here goes." "The ground is frozen." "We've had snow." "The Canada geese are on the lake, taking a rest on their way south." "I miss you, Hannah." "I wish you'd stay home, but at least this time" "I know you're doing war work." "New Mexico sounds beautiful." "You've been having dinner with the same woman all the time." "What's that mean, 'dinner'?" "Well, I'm not knitting you any more warm socks, if you're down there 'having dinner' while I'm up here squirming in my sleep." "I know people read your mail, so I won't say any more." "I don't know how many more times" "I can let you leave me." "At least I'm busy." "I'm working three days a week at the hardware store, bookkeeping." "The man who used to keep their books is serving in Italy." "I'm so thankful you're not overseas." "Be careful in New Mexico, Hannah." "Watch out for snakes." "Check your boots." "Come home soon." "You know I love you, but I'll say it anyway." ""Know ye the Lord, He is God;" "it is He that hath made us, and not we ourselves;" "we are His people..."" "Who the hell are you?" ""...and the sheep of His pasture." "Enter into His gates with Thanksgiving..."" "I said who the hell are you?" ""...and into His courts with praise."" "You can't just waltz in here and start spouting' over me." "Mary, I'm here to help you." "And my name's not Mary." "Don't call me Mary." "It says Mary H. Freed on your door, Mary." "Well, I don't give a rat's ass what the door says." "Profanity is not the language of our Lord." "Don't you want salvation?" "Don't you want to sleep in the loving arms of Our Lord Jesus Christ?" "No." "Now Mary, you don't mean that." "My name is Hannah..." "Hannah Free." "No one has ever called me Mary, not even my own mother." "So why don't you just go talk to some other poor joker who can't talk back." "I can see I haven't caught you on a very good day." "I don't have good days anymore." "Knowing Jesus would lighten your burden." "Believe me..." ""The Lord is Good;" "His mercy is Everlasting."" "So you're on the road to Heaven?" "I have my mansion reserved." "And I'm going to hell?" "If you don't accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior." "You paint a pretty mean-spirited picture of Jesus." "Don't you think that Judgment belongs to God?" "Mary, you are an old woman." "God may be calling your name soon." "The next time the friendly hand of Salvation reaches out to you, Mary, I'd grab it." "My name isn't Mary." "It's the name you were baptized with." "It's the name the Lord will call." "What a friend we have in Jesus." "Never forget that, Mary." "Have a nice day." "You can have your mansion!" "I'll be just fine in hell!" "I hate this about gettin' older." "Think I'm just flapping' my gums to stir up a breeze." "Rachel?" "Rachel?" "Well, if you're not gonna come I'll get a radio... drown out those crazy people in the hall." "Course they probably think I'm crazy too." "Sittin' here alone talkin' my head off." "Jesus, someone's got "As The World Turns" on?" "What in the hell are they doin' spending' their last minutes on earth listening to "The World Turns"?" "I know." "You loved that show." "Lisa and Nancy and Dr. Bob." "Bedpan." "Full." "Rachel?" "One last game of checkers?" "I'll let you win." "My turn?" " Yeah." " Okay." "King me." "Shit." "I don't think that was fair." "I'm gonna have that kid bring me a radio." "I can choose my own noise." "You don't hear anything, do you, Rach?" "You're barely here." "You're tryin' to leave us all behind, and they won't let you." "Rachel..." "Are you still there?" "Guess I shoulda knocked." "Yes, you should have." "They yours?" "Yes." "You were busy while I was in Alaska." "Still pissed at me?" "Yes." "And must you use that language?" "Yes." "You didn't write you were coming." "Didn't wanna warn you." "You just visiting?" "Are you a widow?" "Yes." "I believe I'm back." "I appreciated the money you sent me from Alaska." "I didn't want to use it." "I shouldn't have..." "You don't have to explain, Rachel." "In fact..." "I wish you wouldn't." "I wasn't paying for anything." "If you ask me upstairs," "I don't want you mixed up about why." "I haven't asked." "I bet you will." "I'm a mother now." "So?" "Get out!" "I'm sorry." "You left me, remember?" "You got married!" "I didn't think that meant I was going to lose you." "If I had stayed, what were we supposed to do?" "Trade recipes?" "I needed you, Hannah." "Don't need me..." "Want me, Rachel." "It isn't right." "Why?" "Because Mr. Johnson went belly up in the lake like a dime store goldfish?" "Only you would put it like that." "This is right for us, Rachel." "Tell me you don't want it." "You know, up in Alaska when they're lighting' dynamite someone'll yell," ""Fire in the hole!"" "I think that kinda sums us up." "You're just terrible." "The more you shake your head, the wilder you are under the sheets." "Put those babies down for a nap." "If we start..." "If we start..." "promise you won't leave?" "Cute babies." "They got names?" "Promise?" "Tomorrow I want you to bake me some biscuits wearing' nothin' but this apron." "Hannah, I need an approximation." "How long will you stay?" "I don't know." "I don't wanna know." "Rachel, I need life to surprise me." "If I bake you those biscuits... will you promise to stay till spring?" "You make me those biscuits I'll stay through the summer." "Maybe till the fall..." "You can carve me up for Halloween." "Let's put Marge and Roy in their cribs." "Marge and Roy?" "Yes, Marge and Roy." "I shoulda been here to help you name 'em." "I gotta go home soon, Mama." "You know how Mason has to eat on time." "When I started coming up here every day, he said that was my business - just so long as I got home in time to cook his supper." "And I do." "Faithfully." "Sometimes I cheat a little bit, mix it up ahead of time and heat it up in the microwave." "He doesn't seem to care." "Just so long as when he sits down at exactly 5:30 and leans forward with his fork he's got something to stick it into." "My goodness, sounded a little racy." "And we both know Mason is anything but racy." "The only time he gets romantic is after the Super Bowl." "I talked to Roy." "He said that he can't fly down right now." "His youngest is still in drug rehab, and Linda is on her third divorce." "He does have his troubles." "Glad my family never got into that dope." "At least not that I know of." "Course you never can tell about Barbara's girl, Greta..." "I know." "You warned me." "I said, "Barbara, you have a choice to make." "You can either ruin your life with that godless commie or you can come home."" "What are they gonna do in a big town like Minneapolis?" "He's a passionate young man..." "and she loves him." "Marge, don't make her choose." "Mama, he's a Buddhist!" "I could never understand why a woman with your good sense would spend her life with that darn Hannah." "It's wrong." "And everybody says it's wrong." "The Bible says that it's wrong." "Not that I would ever admit that you did what everybody in this town knows you did." "If somebody baits me," "I just say how weird Hannah was, and that you have always been kind enough to stay her friend." "Not that you two didn't have your knockdown, drag out fights." "I would hear you through the heating vents." "The two of you would rather lose an arm than say anything against each other in public." "I should do that with Mason." "At least he doesn't bore me with his talk." "He doesn't ever really listen either." "Did Hannah ever listen to you?" "I guess she did." "She finally stopped traveling and stayed home." "You would always look at her like she could cure cancer." "She wants to see you, Mama... and I want you to die in peace." "And Hannah never brought you peace." "I've gotta go." "Mason's gonna be cuttin' that placemat up into tiny little squares." "I love you." "Goodnight." "Sleep tight." "I'll see you tomorrow." "Why can't you do that in the garage?" "'Cause it's cold out there and there's not enough light." "Besides, you're in here." "Oh, baloney." "Why don't ya come to bed, huh?" "I could wear something else to Lily's funeral." "My bowling shirt's clean." "It's not like I'm gonna be the star attraction." "They're all gonna be lookin' in at Lily to see what hair color they went with." "Wait." "You know I've never been good at waitin'." "Come on." "Your neck hurt?" "I'll never get over this." "Now you kiss me." "You're in so much trouble." "Get in here." "Dear Jackie," "You write such lively letters I can't compete." "We don't do much whitewater rafting up here at the home." "Yes, I think about New Mexico." "But that's not where my life is..." "My life's here." "I guess it always was." "Go watch the sun rise over the mountains for me, will ya?" "And good luck with your golf swing." "Yours truly..." "Much love, Hannah." "Hi." "Hey." "Feeling down?" "No." "Why do you keep comin' back every day?" "If I was your age," "I sure as hell wouldn't be wastin' my time listening' to some old broad beat her gums." "Well, maybe you just weren't as sensitive as I am." "Hannah?" "Still here." "I hope you won't be mad." "Don't worry." "Whatever it is, you can outrun me easy." "You know those books you loaned me?" "Yeah what happened to 'em?" "Your dog ate 'em?" "Hannah, they're wonderful." "Especially the novel." "I couldn't put it down." "So what's so bad about that?" "You said it wasn't any good." "Well, that's what I was told." "Hannah, I hope you won't be upset..." "I faxed the first chapter to this professor friend of mine." "She loved what she read." "And if you let me send her the whole thing," "I know she'll publish it." "It's not a big New York publishing company, but people could read your book." "Jesus, I'd love to see that." "But you'd better tell 'em not to keep it too long at the printers." " Hannah!" " Well..." "Why wasn't it published years ago?" "Hell, I tried." "I sent it out." "And I got it back." "A lot." "Some guy at Random House or Scribners wrote me a really lousy letter." "He said he wanted to 'save me from further embarrassment'." "Why?" "Because it doesn't have some guy jacking off in a bullring in Spain?" "I suspect the reason was because it was about two women together." "But it's good." "Doesn't that count?" "Happens all the time, honey." "What the hell." "I've had a good life." "I did what I wanted, pretty much." "Except now." "Well, even now... if I could just be with Rachel." "It's not so bad coming to the end if you're not alone." "Shit." "You're awful." "So why do you keep comin' back?" "The truth?" "Always." "She really is my great grandmother." "She who?" "Rachel." "I wasn't lying when I told the nurse that." "Are you kiddin'?" "No, I'm not." "But I met all her family." "And you met me." "Years ago, you took me fishing so I wouldn't hear" "Marge and my mom fighting about Daddy." "And we never came back to Michigan after that." "But I always remember" "Rachel's hot chocolate and going fishing with you." "You're Barbara's girl." "And you were wearing a yellow dress." "Boy, I sure didn't have you figured." "I had you figured." "You and Rachel." "I came out a couple years ago..." "I've always had crushes on girls." "So you want me to be your lesbian heritage?" "You gonna write a song about me?" "I just wanted to get to know you better." "You and Great Grandma Rachel." "Jesus Christ..." "That means Marge is your grandmother." "Sorry." "That's why I wanted you to get to like me before I told you." "So..." "You seen the old battle-ax?" "Only once up here." "And not on purpose." "And last year at Mom's funeral." "Rachel and I were in here by then." "Mom was kind of like how Rachel is now..." "Lots of tubes and machines." "It was up to me." "I had to let her go." "I wish I could do that for Rachel." "Well, why don't you?" "I mean, what's the worst anyone could do, arrest you?" "Lock you up somewhere?" "Got a point there, kid." "You must hate seeing her like this." "I just don't know if I've got the guts to say that last goodbye." " Hey." " Hey." "What are you doing with that suitcase?" "What suitcase?" "The one under the bed." "You just kicked it under there when you heard me coming." "Where do you think you're going?" "The Himalayas." "Why?" "I just need a change." "Michigan doesn't have any mountains." "I mean, I know you've got the Porcupines..." "Michigan has me." "Well, you could come." "Hannah, I'm older than dirt." "Right." "And you've never crossed the state line." "I've never needed to." "What are you looking for?" "I don't know, exactly." "I just need something different." "Different just for the sake of different?" "Yeah." "Well, that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my life, and I've been listening to you for over 40 years." "I'll be back by spring." "Don't you dare!" "What?" "If you walk out that door, don't come back!" "Get your junk out of my garage!" "And don't send me a Christmas card!" "Just go." "Go!" "Jesus." "Don't you know where your home is?" "Don't you know that yet?" "Hannah, a dog is smarter than you." "Well, what about what I want?" "All our lives have been about what you want." "This is about what I want." "You've had your chance to roam." "Now, dammit, stay home!" "Sit on the porch with me, and mow the lawn." "Put your clothes in the closet." "Clean the cat box." "Don't just visit..." "be with me." "I know every inch of this place - every flower, every nail, every bullfrog." "There's just never anything new for me to see." "If you can't find yourself, be yourself, here with me, where can you?" " Rachel." " It's not out there..." "It's here." "I'll try..." "I'll try." "Do better than try." "It's almost dawn, Hannah." "Just let me sit with her for a few more minutes." "Well, sure." "Look, we don't have to do this tonight." "We can wait till tomorrow." "I never liked doin' that." "Neither did she." "Wash the dishes now, don't leave 'em." "Right, Rachel?" "It's time." "Rachel..." "What am I gonna do without you?" "You'll never be without me." "I look at you two and that's what I want." "I'm just sorry you never got to really know Rachel." "I do..." "Through you." "Goodbye, kiddo." "Shit, I heard that." "So, finally it's your turn to leave me, huh, Rachel?" "I just wish we coulda had Greta and her gal over." "You know, sit and eat your potato salad on the porch?" "Wouldn't we have liked that?" "We coulda gone to visit Greta in Minneapolis - if I ever coulda gotten you outta town." "Ah, Rachel, there are parades and festivals, newspapers, and women's bookstores, that we never in our wildest imaginings..." "I just wish it could've come sooner." "So, is that, is that, uh, is that the one?" "'Cause I don't wanna just unplug the clock." "You're sure this is what you want?" "Hannah, I've had a full life - oh, my God, what a life - but it's over." "Let it be over, please, Hannah." "What is going on here?" "I'm giving your mother her life back." "You get away from her!" "Grandma, let go of her." "Where do you get off?" "Hannah's just trying to do what you should've done months ago." "You wheel her down here?" "How could you?" "She has every right to be here." "She does not!" "Of course she does." "They're lovers." "Oh, I hate that word." "I don't give a shit." "That's what they are." "You shut up." "You shut up." "You have no idea what this is about." "Of course I do." "Just stop it, both of you." "Marge, I'm glad you came." "Oh, I bet you are." "It's time, Marge." "You and I oughta do this together." "It's not about you;" "it's not about me." "It's about her." "We both love her." "And saying goodbye to her... hurts us more than anything in this world." "But it's time." "I can't." "She's ready to go..." "We gotta let her go." "I love her so much." "And I've always been so jealous of you." "And I always wanted her to myself." "Did you hate us?" "I never hated you." "Remember the moonflowers?" "I still have some in my garden, but I'm the only one who appreciates them." "I would." "Please." "What was that?" "Her." "Can't be." "Listen." "Please." "She said please?" "She wants you to help her, Grandma." "Why don't you turn off the I.V." "Greta..." "You unplug that." "If anyone asks, if there's ever any trouble," "I will say I did it." "It's okay." "I'll be so lonely." "Oh, Mama..." "I love you." "Rachel." "Wait!" "Wait for me!"