"Subtitles by Aaslund" "So that's what you look like?" "Three." "Rufus has broken three paws and his tail." "He could fill a room with joy,  and now he's just an out-of-level bookend." "He is trying to pull himself forward with his healthy paw,  but the three legs in cast just wont move." "When he's giving you his paw, he falls on that cute, little nose of his." " Like a cheese!" " Yes, like a cheese." "Yes, I had a really bad day." "You had a bad day?" "Do you think that's what Hitler thought when he walked into the ghettoes?" ""I'm sorry, I'm just having a really bad day."" "You monster." "He was just a tiny whelp." " Whelp?" " Yes." " I will pay this, of course." " Bloodmoney." "Judasmoney." "The doctor says he will never fully recover." "Imagine that for a small dog." "Staggering through his life like a drunken Norwegian." "It's a disgrace." "He plays with him every day for three-four-five hours." " Ten hours!" " Seven." "Seven hours a day he's playing with him." "And now..." "He doesn't have a family to blame for his shortcomings." "He blames a beaver." "Do you want to talk about it?" "I told myself I wasn't going to drink for a year,  and here I am again." "Goddamnit." "I have a picture in my head where I am dancing  and everyone around me are seventeen." "Like a corpse fresh out of the grave and electrocuted back to life." " Bobble head Elvis, you know." " Yeah, I get it." "If they were 17-18 you'll never see them again." "Tell that to the voice in my head." "Worst thing is that back in the day I could have gotten any one of them." " Does that matter?" " No, not anymore." "You couldn't have removed the dishes first?" "You know what else I can't have?" "Your brother." " Is that what you want?" " Well, I don't know." "No." "Here." "File it under Operating costs." "I can't see." "So what is this?" "It is proof that I can't be around living things." " When's the first couple?" " They're in your office." "Hey, Dag?" "Why aren't you serving tea to your patients?" "Chai or Rooibus, something relaxing." "I want them to be on top when I see them." "If they're calm and harmonius,  they're in a different state of mind than where the problem is." "It seems more fair that they just go in and fight." "It save them money and me having to see them more than necessary." " And they've been served?" " Both of them." "Doubles." "Great." "Alright, here we are again." " So, what can I do for you?" " My wife drinks too much." "If you ask him." "Can you blame me?" "You want sex all the time." "I need something strong." "Shut ut, or I am going to slam it into your number 2." " And before you ask." "No." " No, what?" "I'm not an alcoholic." " So how much do you drink?" " Enough to make it through." "Could I have some more espresso?" "Malin, turn off the intercom." "This isn't radiotheater." " Haven't you had enough?" " There it is." "That's exactly how I feel." "It's my turn now." "The point is that she drinks when she is cooking,  and then she has wine when she's eating,  and then she has a drink to relax when she's doing the dishes." " So what do you do?" " I don't drink." "Can I get up, or should I just sit?" "Do what you want." "How long have you been together?" "Seven, seven, seven." " Years?" "Seven years?" " More espresso, maybe?" "Malin!" "Yes..." "You are now in what we call dead relationship walking- syndrome." "Your relationship is going full speed ahead towards the electric chair  with just a few feet to go." "I'll gladly let you arrest me,  but lsak, I think your wife is the one more bored in this relationship right now." "Your outlet is sexual and she needs wine." "So she should just continue drinking?" "To quote Sinatra." "I am for everything that gets you through the day,  be it pills, prayer or a bottle of booze." "If I understand you correctly we don't have to be together anymore?" "Use your money on something else before Isak goes down on the corner to score some espresso." "Stop touching your breast!" "Okay." "I'm out." "Goddamn women." "Should've pounded your deuce." "Don't think I want you when you behave like this." "Let's see." "Here we go." "Bernanders Moving Co." "Say hi from me, you'll get a discount." "But don't curse." "He's christian." "I told him he could take a cup." "Your sister came by." "I told her she could wait in the office,  but she'd rather meet down at the coffee shop." "She looked sad." "Does she have any problems?" "Or do you?" "Is there anything between you two?" "It's great, Malin." "Just great." "Right, that should do it." "Yes, yes." "Malin said you came by." "She looked like she was going to bill me for looking sad in the waiting room." "That's pretty much what we're doing." " Sad?" " Yes." "Or no." "Theo is thinking about moving to his dad." "He's seventeen." "At that age I thought I was the dumbest person on earth." "His dad is the dumbest person on earth." " What are you doing?" " I am going to be a father." "But I'm still young." "I've got hair and everything." "And that's why you're nailing your head to the bench?" "When you pierce your ear," " Can I put the ring in right away, or should I wait until it heals a little?" "Lend me a hand here." " You met him when he was very vulnerable." " He is a halfwit." "You're not a real person to Theo." "He is only 17." "You're just his mother." "If he gets someone else to compare you with, and in this case  the bottomfeeder of humanity, you'll be coming out on top." "That's how you have to think about this." "The apartement isn't half empty, it's half full." "Which is less than what you can say about my sofa guest." "Eva?" "Is she drunk?" "Yes." "She's moving out today, by the way." "She found an apartment." "She took it without seeing it first, so..." "You have to ask her out on a date." " Why?" " She wants you to." " She was asking for it." " Asking for it?" "She asked for it." " Well, it has to be tonight then." " Why?" "Because this day is already ruined, and because you'll keep nagging until I say yes." " There aren't any." " Nobody?" "What do you mean there aren't any?" "As in "There aren't any more patients."" " Well, today?" " No, at all." " Why not?" " 90% of all you patients  only come here once before they get a divorce." "And then they don't have much reason for couples councelling." "You've used up all the customers you had." "Cured." "What about the others?" "Stokstad is in a discount week for couples with sexual problems  and Torgersen is still doing his anger management." "Torgersen?" "He doesn't know anything." "Torgersen." "Hello, Lars." "So you've started with anger management?" "We've been working on impulse control." "He's fine now." "Looks very fine." "How many hours have you had?" " Ten." " Ten, you say?" "Well, my wife left me after we went to see you." "I think it got to be a bit much for her when you used $20.000 on a couple of ninja swords and a few melons." "You are no fruit platter, Lars." "But your wife was warm and inclusive   and witty and smart." "And in addition she was very beautiful." "You are more, and feel free to correct me, compost." "It doesn't seem he is fully cured, Torgersen." "You could ask for your money back, Lars." "Put him down for another hour." "I just realized I know a guy working for the newspaper." "I can put an ad in, so you don't have to bankrupt everybody." "Yes, do that." "I think you need a cold cloth." " What time is it?" " Quarter past ten." "Quarter past ten?" "Not more?" " No." " Good god..." "Malin, why do you work here?" " I like it here." " Come on." " Honestly?" " Yes, honestly." "I love human disappointment." "Not disappointment, suffering." "People completely eradicating their pride." "To see people voluntarily run their heads through the wall with their heart in their hand." "I love it." "That's my cup of tea." "I'll put that ad in." "While I have you here, take your building manager job seriously, and fix that elevator." "Yes, I know." "Wait in the hallway." "I've had a fucked up day." "I don't know if I have the strength to listen." "There are two kinds of stories, Dag." "There are the sad ones, that your patients give you,  and then there are the ones that make you feel better  because someone is worse off than you." "And that's me." " Today, not even you." " Oh yes." "I once again woke up from my smokers cough,  bathing in sweat." "Lungs howling." " Smoke addiction help line." " I just quit." "I'm going to crack in the next 15 if you don't give me some good tips." " Who am I talking to?" " Eilin." "Ok." "My name is Benedict." "I..." "You have a very beautiful voice." "Hvor lenge har du holdt på, Benedict?" "To be completely honest, I quit just now." "Or, I just woke up and decided to quit." "Eilin, was that your name?" "My future is in your hands." "You can always call us when you're going through tough times." "You've reached the Smoke addiction help line." "We're busy, but please leave a message." "Hi, Eilin." "It's Benedict from this morning." "I'm really struggling, so I was wondering if you could call me back." "Ok." "Hear from you soon." "Bye." " Hello." "Benedict." " Hi." " This is Eilin from Smoke addiction help line." " I can hear that." "Is there anything I can do for you?" "Unfortunately she didn't get off work until four o'clock." "That was a delicious martini." "Can I have another one?" "I'm just a hunk, a hunk of burning love." "Come to papa." "She was the local champion of standing high jump in Sogndal as an 18 year old." "Once at a community festival she jumped over Tone Damli Aaberge." "You're just so incredibly beautiful." "After the third time I fell asleep, she couldn't be bothered anymore." "For two hours I slept with my head in that mini bar." "When I got down to the garage I ran into Mia's butcher brothers." "They were screaming that they were going to kill me if I didn't sign the paternity papers." "Try to run 60 meters when your head is at 17 degrees." "Check this." "Frostbite." "Hurts like hell." "I needed something to warm my head with." "Not funny." "I look like a mix between a hot dog salesman and a Sikh." "I don't want to be like that." "I'm not the kind of guy who just sleeps around." "What's working against you are labels, I'd say." "You're a multi-faceted, well-read, smart, soft man." "But deep inside you're still just a man whore." "You feel that that label is reducing the other ones, but it doesn't." "You don't remove the fact that you're a man whore with a pillowcase on your head." " No..." " No." " What do you think?" " Same shirt as last time." " Girls notice these things." " So do you, apparently." "Don't open it." "They're here." "Hi." "Come in." "Are you playing hide-and-seek, or is someone getting executed?" "The latter." "I thought we were going to meet up at the restaurant." "Yeah, I was just very early." "And in the shape I'm in," " I didn't have the guts to go in there alone." "I'm just going to change my shirt." " Bad day?" " Very." "Me too." "Anything special?" "Some problems with this lady I know." "Several ladies, really." "Yes, should we go?" " Good luck." " Thanks, have fun." " I don't know if I can handle this." " Yes, come on." " What are you getting?" " Carbonara." "Always carbonara." "This is fucked up." "Not meeting you, but being out among people right now." "Yes, always is." "So why are you here?" "Because Marianne said you wanted to see me." "Do you?" "What is that?" "It's not a what, it's a who." "He is the best medicine against dating, anxiety and socializing." "Better now?" " What?" " I can hear him calling." "Come to mama, my cute, tiny bear." "No....no.." "You can't have any more now, Eva." "He is very, very kind, but he can also be very, very bad." "Are you feeling dizzy?" "It was nice while it lasted." "You have to portion that panda a bit." "It hits hard on us laymen." "I will." "I promise." "I know you don't like company after a date." "Good night." "(If today wasn't an endless road)" "(If tonight wasn't a winding path)" "(If tomorrow didn't feel so eternal)" "(Then loneliness would be a word that didn't exist.)" "(But only if my love is there, waiting.)" "(If I can hear her hearts gentle beat.)"