"Previously on Greek:" "Spitter and Pledge Spidey have successfully stolen the AM goat!" "Are you trying to seduce me again?" "I hear it's even better the second time." "Laura, I enjoy our time together, but I don't wanna hide it." " I wanna take it outside the pantry." " No." "The minute we fight with KT, you help your boyfriend Heath and his friends humiliate us." " That is not what I intended." " You guys are cool?" "They let me resign to avoid impeachment." "It's gonna take some time to get back in their good graces, but I'm working on it." "Thousands of people graduated in May, and none of us are owed anything." "You have to think short-term as well as long." "Every time I get rejected from yet another job," " I think about it." " I can't believe" "I wasted my time trying to help you." " Then go!" " Can I buy you a drink?" " I would love one, professor." " Call me Simon." " What are we doing?" "What is this?" " It's a fairy tale." "Wake up, Titans, this is 89.1 FM." "It's Homecoming Day here at CRU, and do we have a game for you, as the Titans take on the AM Farmhands!" "To say that these two teams have a past, whoa, that's an understatement." "Kickoff just three hours..." "Touchdown!" "Oh!" "Hey, Cap." "Why have we never had a slumber party at ZBZ before?" "This duvet?" "Heavenly." "And the bathroom, no mold." "Please tell me no one saw you." "Don't worry, I was stealthy." "And it was only number one." " And I wiped the seat." " Surprisingly thoughtful." "Ash didn't come home last night." "Well, she would have gotten quite a show." "Especially around 3:00, 3:15." "I didn't know my body bent that way." "Oh!" "OK." "You've got to get dressed." "If you get out of here now, then Ash will never know we slept together." "She'll just misinterpret everything and think that we're getting back together." "Would that be such a bad thing?" "It's what the people want." "Cap, I'm so sorry, but last night doesn't change things." "We're still the same people with the same issues." "OK." "Well, thanks for the evening of meaningless sex." "I shall now commence my walk of shame." "Great, um, but can you make it a leap?" "Thanks." " Is this safe?" "Ah!" " OK." "Rusty?" "Rusty." " You OK?" " What?" "Looks like you had quite the night." " What happened?" " This shirt chafes my nipples." "What's on your face?" "Man, did Beaver find out where I hid the markers?" "Well, I either kissed a girl or gave a clown mouth-to-mouth." " You don't remember?" " I blacked out." "Oh." "What the hell?" "Please tell me there were no clowns at this party." "No clowns." "Just a goat and two heroes." "Rusty, thanks to that goat," "I made out with a Titan cheerleader!" "A cheerleader!" "Well, she's a base in the pyramid, but she's still a solid seven." "A seven!" "This totally makes up for missing prom." "Please." "I'm very happy for you." "Just no loud and sudden movements, OK?" "Rusty, if I smooched a seven, your girl must have been a ten." "Rusty, what are you doing out here?" "Just resting my eyes." "What are you doing in here?" " You don't remember?" " Why?" "Did I do something stupid?" "Please tell me I didn't break dance." "No." "Casey and I got in a fight and you said I could crash here while I find my own place." " But if that's not OK..." " No, that's OK." "What was the fight about?" "Did you eat in her car?" " I've been there." " No." "Um, just life stuff." "I'll tell you about it later." "But right now I need to go pack." "So, thanks." "Oh, my life..." "Hey, Rusty, thanks for the heads up that Ashleigh was sleeping on the couch." "I got up last night to get a drink of water, and she saw my full monty in the fridge light." "I'm so sorry." "I was really drunk last night." "I know." "I have the voicemails to prove it." " What are you talking about?" " You wanna hear 'em?" "No." "Hey, Dale, it's R-r-r-rusty!" "I got your goat." "You get it?" "'Cause usually that phrase is used in situations that have nothing to do with goats." "But this time I've actually got your goat!" "Dale, why are you not at this party?" "You have "Goat" To check it out." "Enjoy your 15 minutes, Rusty." "Hey, Calvin, I'd stop and talk, but I'm making a dramatic exit." " What was that about?" " He's upset that I got his goat." "See?" "It's funny." " What's with the eye wear, Snooki?" " I found these at the house." "The sun's killing my eyes." "I think I turned into a vampire last night." "I don't remember anything." "But I have this feeling that something really good happened to me last night." " And something really bad." " You wanna veg here, uh, watch the game, order a pizza?" "Maybe something will come to you." "You're not going to the game?" "Well, you know, we haven't hung out in a while." "So I thought it might be fun to catch up." "Come on, you love football games." "Yeah, but my seats were with my Omega Chi brothers." "And I could just use a day away from fraternity today." " You "Goat" it." " OK, I'm calling it." "No more goat jokes." "You're calling me." "Hey, Katherine, I am so sorry I am late!" "But I have a really good excuse." "I was in this half marathon this morning and this guy ahead of me started to have a heart attack so I had to give him, um, CPR." "And it just took forever to get a pulse!" " Katherine?" " Hm?" "Oh, um, I'm so sorry, Casey." "I'm just a little distracted this morning with a personal dilemma." " You see, I've taken a lover." " My, how classy." "I've read enough Victorian literature to know that I cannot afford to be careless or the next thing you know" "I'll be out on the street begging for tuppence to feed my bastard love child." "So you and your stable boy need birth control?" "He's not a stable boy, Casey." "In fact, he wants to be a kindergarten teacher." "Wait." "Beaver?" "His given name is Walter, but yes." "We made a connection during our night in Rio." "But do not worry, we have been using condoms." " Yay!" " So many condoms." "The thing is, I would prefer to have a second layer of defense, one that I control." "Yeah." "So, um, wait, you're sleeping with Beaver, and his name is Walter?" "Casey, can you please stay focused on the issue at hand?" "All right, all right." "Which is...?" " Birth control pills or the vaginal ring?" " Oh." "Wow, the v-word." "I have a prescriptions for both, then I did my research, and now I need to choose one." "The pill will regulate my menstrual cycle, but with the vaginal ring," "I do not have to swallow pharmaceuticals." "Which is fantastic 'cause I've notice that I recently have a horrible kind of a gagging reflex." "What do you use?" "Well, I was on the pill." "Then when Cappie and I broke up" "I went off it because it just made me so bloated." "Better bloated than pregnant." "Anyway, enough of my prattling." "Shall we dive in?" "Let's get my phone and let's get out of here." "All right, all right!" "Listen up, everybody!" "Last night, this man stole a goat and made Titan history!" "Hey!" "No!" "He's got a hangover." "It's like going to the mall with Justin Bieber." "It is an honor to shake your hand, my friend." "You're a legend." "A legend?" "No." "What does that even mean?" " OK." "Let's just get your phone." " Right, right." "Here you go, man." "You know, you left your coat here, too." "Oh, thank you." "Hey." "OK, there's got to be some evidence on here of what happened last night." " Who's that?" " I don't know." "She looks pretty." "No, she is blonde and a mouth." "She could be the good thing that happened to me last night." "I woke up with lipstick all over my face." "I hate to remind you that you just broke up with Dana, but, man, this has rebound written all over it." "Remember that green girl from Comic-Con?" "I'm still embarrassed for you." "This is different." "I know" "I kissed the girl of my dreams last night." "OK, how are we gonna find this magical mystery mouth?" "We have no clues." "Not so fast, we have a... flash drive?" "Ooh, maybe she's a Russian spy." " Her name's Carol." " Or a local librarian." " We need to talk." " You can't stop thinking about last night either?" " I keep replaying it over and over again." " Me, too." " What was your favorite part?" " What?" "No, I'm trying to remember if we used a condom." "Let me check." "Well, I've still got Ol' Yeller." "Looks like we went commando." "That's what I was afraid of." "Hey, what's the big deal?" "I just got tested, you're on the pill." "Not anymore." "Well..." "I did not know that." " Oh, so this is my fault?" " No, you know what?" "Let's take a deep, cleansing breath, OK?" "We don't even know if anything happened..." " ...in there." " Well, we both know that I could be pregnant." "You could be the p-word, but you're probably not." " But I could be." " But you're probably not." "OK, you know what?" "Forget I even said anything." "After all, it's my problem, not yours." "We're 30 minutes away from kickoff and the name of the game today is defense, defense, defense." " Yes, how can I help you?" " Hm, where to begin?" "Well, I got into this huge fight with my best friend Ashleigh last night..." " And then you had unprotected sex." " Yes." "Not with her..." "How did you know?" "That's where all these stories end." "Well, I was hoping that you carry, um, that pill you can take, you know, the morning after." "The Morning-After Pill?" "I just need 30 bucks and an ID." "Now, you might experience some mild side effects:" " headaches, dizziness, nausea." " I'm way ahead of you." "Casey?" " Katherine?" " You'll be happy to know that after our chat this morning," "I've decided to go on the pill." "Gag reflex be damned." "So I'm just here to pick up my prescription." " Yay, birth control." " I know." "I was just..." "I was here..." "I was just, um..." "Perhaps you'd like me to ring up your friend while you finish testing out reading glasses?" "Oh, yes." "Of course." "Law school is really giving the ol' peepers a workout." "Prescription for Parker, comma, Katherine." "With a K." " Now, these pills take three weeks..." " To become effective." "I've read all the literature online," "I feel well-versed in the side effects." "Thank you." " Wow." "You're very prepared." " Well, I'm also not an idiot." "Like Whitney Houston, I believe that children are the future." "It's just a far distant future after I've made partner." "Am I right, Casey?" "Yes, that is the plan." "No, and our kids can have play dates." " My God, I think my little Anastasia would love that." " Oh, my God!" " So I'll call you." "I'll pencil it in." " Yes!" "Thank you for your help here today." " I'm gonna have so much fun tonight." "Bye!" " Ooh!" "Bye!" "Ok..." "Everybody gets one." "And it goes in your mouth, not the floor or the furniture." "You have five minutes to go upstairs and get yourself presentable." "Everyone is checked in, and I'm ready to hand this thing over." " Hand what over?" " We're baby-sitting faculty kids during the game to score philanthropy points for the house." "Because it's nice and whatever." "Did I forget to tell you?" "Yes." "But it looks like you've got it under control, so here's your pat on the back." "Casey, you of all people should know that as president, my job is strategic planning." "Execution is up to the staff." " You, Dale, Laura." " I'm not staff," "Rebecca." "I'm philanthropy chair." "Right." "My bad." "At least you get a paycheck." "Tick-tock, four and a half minutes." "Hello?" "Are you Carol?" "I'm Tawny." "That's Carol." "Yeah." "That looks like a Carol." "Goat boy!" "Life of the party!" " We partied together?" " I was the party photographer." "You really don't remember?" "You were in practically every shot." "Everything about last night was a little hazy." "Including why I have this." "So first you stole the AM goat, then you steal my flash drive." "Dude, you're a legend!" "Wait here." "I wanna take your pic and put it on my celebrity wall." "Right next to Gary Coleman," "God rest his tiny soul." "So this appears to be a dead end." "What do you say we go back to your couch and watch the game?" "Not so fast." "The girl I kissed had to be at the party last night." " So was half the university." " He was the only photographer." "And he just said I'm in almost every pic." "Don't worry, I'm about to leave." "My awesome future awaits." "For someone who wants me gone so bad, you could at least get out of my way." " Where are you headed?" " None of your beeswax." "OK, well, just, you know, don't blame me if someone steals your InStyle." "Fine, I'm staying over at Rusty's till I find my own place." "Rusty's?" "Ash, wait." "Case, you really hurt my feelings." "And a simple apology isn't gonna fix this." "Well, don't forget your flat iron." "You can't have a serious job search with frizzy hair." "That would be great." "OK, I'll be right back." "Ash, are you OK?" "You look like you're about to fly coach." "I'm fine." "I just gotta get out of here." "OK, but you're still my date to the game, right?" "I'll meet you there." "Ashleigh?" " Professor Segal." " Come on." "I think after last night," " you can call me Simon." " You look like Beyonce." "Thank you." "That is the best thing that's happened to me all day." " Ashleigh, this is my daughter, Hailey." " Hi." " Hi." " I'm gonna check out the snack situation." "OK." "I'll be right there, sweetie." " All right." " So you have a daughter?" "Yeah." "I also have an ex-wife." "I thought you graduated." "I did." "I was just crashing here with Casey." "She's the house mother, and it's a long, boring story." "I can't imagine there's anything about you that's boring." "And that's the kick-off." "Hold on to your seats, folks." "Things are just getting started." " Oh, my God." " It's like watching Bizarro Rusty." "Whoa, wait a minute." "Go back." "Deirdre and Jasmine?" "If you kissed one of them, then we need to get you to Student Health ASAP." "Katherine." "I must've kissed Katherine last night." "The Farmhands have come out so strong, they're already knocking on the Titan's front door." " Hey, can I talk to you?" " It's really not a good time, Cap." " It'll just take a second." " What is it?" "Look, I'm really sorry for freaking out on you earlier." " It's no big deal, Cap." " But if you are the p-word, then we'll deal with this together." "Really?" "Because you can't even say the word." "I'm listening." "Yes?" "Pregnant!" "See?" "OK." "Well, you know what?" "Everything's fine, Cap." " I took the Morning-After Pill." " Oh, thank God." "What's the Morning-After Pill?" "I bet you can't count all the cats in this room over here." "OK, uh, the game has started." "You should just go." " You sure you're OK?" " I'm hung over, hormonal and surrounded by screaming children, so no." "Then let me stay and help." "Our house needs philanthropy hours, anyways." "Thanks, but these kids need adult supervision." "You know what?" "I've seen" "Adventures In Babysitting, like, 19 times." "OK?" "I can handle these kids way better than Elisabeth Shue handled her career." "OK, fine, just man the arts and crafts table." "But don't sniff the markers." "What a play!" " Oh!" "Yeah." " I can't believe he caught that." "Touchdown for the Titans." "Look at how crowded the stands are." "Good thing we're here with all this space." " Katherine?" " No." "She must be in a marathon study session." "So she handed you her virginity on a silver platter, and you just sent it back to the kitchen." "Why would she, all of a sudden, give you a second chance?" "Because that goat made me a legend." "Plus, we have so much in common." "We're both smart, we're both ambitious, we're both..." " ...here." " Rusty, what a pleasant surprise." "Happy Homecoming to you and your friend." " What are you doing here?" " If you must know," "I have entered into a consensual sexual relationship with Walter." "And, in fact, we're spending the entire day in bed ravishing each other" " and I will not be ashamed of it." " You go, girl." " Who's Walter?" " Pretty lady!" " Hi." " Should we try pina colada or black cherry next?" "Spitter!" "You were drunker than I was last night." " I'm, uh, thinking cherry." " OK." "You and, uh, Beaver?" "I thought we made out last night." "Actually, it was quite the opposite, though not for your lack of trying." "I think your exact wording was, "OK, you can have me now."" "OK, I'm sorry, Katherine." "I was really drunk." "I'm just trying to piece together my evening." " And, apparently, his dignity." " Well, if it helps," "I think you left the party to "Storm the lab."" "Storm the lab?" "I think you might have misheard me." "You got up on the coffee table and you said," ""Let's go storm the lab!"" "I have someone waiting for me." "I think we found that bad thing." "Dear Lord, please give me the strength to survive this infestation." "Someone spilled grape juice in the kitchen." "We need you on it pronto, Mr. Belvedere." "Why don't you clean it up with your mop-like hair?" "Dale, need I remind you that I am one of your employers?" "I swear, ever since you started pledging Omega Chi, you've developed quite an attitude." "Or maybe you dumped me because I was a nobody." "And now that I'm a somebody, it really bothers you." "There are many things that bother me about you." "That is not one of them." "It must be torture seeing me every day." "The one that got away." "Oh, it's torture all right." "Hey, Dalie!" "What's the score?" "Dale one, Laura zero." "The Farmhands are up, 14-zip." "Damn!" "I mean, darn it." "Hey, how'd you...?" "I wish I'd thought of that." "So I noticed you're friends with the lady in charge?" "That is our current status, I believe." "It's hard to keep track." "They're telling me I can't climb the rock wall because I'm not 12." "It's flat-out age discrimination." "Maybe you could put in a good word for me?" "I don't know." "See, we used to date, and I'm trying to prove to her that I can be responsible..." "Oh, look, I get all my drama from One Tree Hill, OK?" "If you can't help, can you at least point me to the bathroom?" "Yeah, it's upstairs." "I'll get someone to take you." " I think I can handle it." " Well, see, I can't let you go upstairs alone." " 'Cause that would be irresponsible." " OK, then you take me." " That could look bad." " Dude, I'm not from Perverted Justice." " You'll wait in the hall." " Got it." "First down, Titans!" "Rebecca, something good happened!" "We're bouncing and cheering!" " I don't feel like bouncing." " Good, 'cause neither do I." "I don't know what bothers me more:" "that Evan hasn't texted me all day, or that I care?" "Do you wanna talk about it?" "What else is there to say?" "I'm pathetic." " No, you're not." " Let's just talk about you and Casey, OK?" "Please?" "OK." "All right." "I don't know what bothers me more:" "That I'm so mad at her or that I can't ask her for advice." "You can ask me instead." "OK." "Well, there's this guy..." "Pedro." "Loving it already." "Pedro." "Names have been changed to protect the innocent." "But all you need to know is that Pedro is wrong for me." "And yet, I'm just so drawn to him." "But if I pursue it, Casey may never forgive me." " Then say no to Pedro." " But I really like Pedro." " And, in fact, last night we kissed." " Ash, forget about Pedro." "If he threatens your relationship with Casey, he's not worth it." "Period." "OK, not what I thought you'd say." "Look, say you go for it with Pedro." "You really decide to let your guard down with him." "Then, little by little, you find yourself needing him more and more." "Then one day you realize that you love Pedro so much that the thought of him leaving scares you." "Then he starts pulling away..." "Are we still talking about Pedro?" "It's a long pass down the field." "Touchdown, Titans!" "I can't believe I used my own name." "Well, at least the goat is alive." "So no harm, no foul." "The wire is gone." "OK, my wire's gone." "OK, just don't panic." "You'll just, you know, build a new one." "Yeah, sure." "I just need $100,000 and the last year of my life back." "Sarcasm doesn't solve any problems," "All my work is gone." "God, man, I'm gonna get expelled and end up an electrician like my bitter Uncle Steve." "Rusty, these aren't letters, they're numbers." "Oh, God, do you think I changed my ATM pin?" "No, I think it's a telephone number." "Call it." "Please have my wire." "And be my soul mate." "But just mostly, have the wire." "OK." "You scrub that wall, I'm gonna find out whose phone this is." "Yes, sir, goat man." "Hey, Little Miss Sunshine, you about done in there?" "The name's Hailey." "And don't rush me." "I've never seen this much makeup in my life!" "No, no, no, no, no." "Hailey, that's not your stuff." "OK?" "Just put it down and come on out." "As soon as I finish my smoky eyes." "OK, listen, usually I'm all about the mischief, but this is so not cool." "Don't make me bust down this door!" "What's going on?" "This little girl locked herself in the bathroom." "Touch my concealer and I swear to you I will kill Santa Claus!" "Jeez." "The shade has been discontinued." " What are you two doing?" " Not my fault." "It's a funny story." "This little girl needed to go to the bathroom." "So I escorted her up here, and then she locked the door." "And might be overdosing on cosmetics." "Well, these things happen." "We'll just call her parents and see if they have any advice on how to get her out." " What's her name?" " Uh, Hailey." "Hailey, Hailey, Hailey..." "Hailey." "Hailey Segal." "Oh, my God!" "Hailey Segal?" "What?" "What happened We were being so calm." "It was nice." "You let my torts professor's daughter lock herself in the bathroom!" "Hey, how was I supposed to know she'd do that?" "Oh, I don't know, maybe because she's an eight year old girl." " Well..." " Wait." "Where'd she go?" "Man, she is sneaky." "You were supposed to keep them under control." "I'm a sorority girl, not SuperNanny." "All right, listen up, you little vermin!" "I didn't grow up with your nannies and your private schools and your liberal elite ideas." "I grew up on a small farm in Arkansas where I was a junior rodeo champ." "So either shut it, or I'll hog-tie each one of you in under eight seconds flat." "Now, go get a juice box." "Quietly!" "You're totally turned on right now, aren't you?" "I am." "I'm not." "Laura and Dale have corralled the other kids into one room of the house." " Any sign of her?" " No, but she couldn't have gotten far." "Unless she's in the back of a van." "Listen." "I'm here with you, we're going to find her, OK?" " OK." " When you guys are done with your tender moment, can someone help me down?" "Wait, oh!" "How did you get up there?" "Um, where is the safety guy?" "Across the street in his truck listening to the game." "OK." "I will go get him." "No, I got it, Case." "OK, Hailey, I want you to let go." " And I'll catch you." " Catch me?" "Are you kidding?" "You let me lock myself in the bathroom." " Get me a grownup." " OK, fine." " Have fun falling." " Where...?" "OK, fine." "Here I go." "One, two three!" " See?" "I got you." " Oh, my gosh!" "Are you OK?" "I'm fine." "How did you get your eyeliner so thin?" "Well, it's good to know that you're OK." "This is the address I found in the phone." "We had to bring the goat?" "I couldn't just leave her in the lab." "How do you know it's a her?" "Rusty!" "And a goat." " Please tell me you have my phone." " Uh, yep, here you go." "Did I leave it in the lab?" "We ran out of there so fast last night." "I know, that was crazy." "We were running..." "You don't remember me, do you?" " Nope, sorry, I don't." " I'm Calvin." "Ah!" "Rusty's gay friend." "I'm Denise." "You really don't remember me?" " I pierced your nipple." " Why would you do that?" "Well, you asked me to." "You said that wire we stole was a part of you, and you wanted it implanted closest to your heart." " You pierced my nipple with my wire?" " OK, weird." "We need to find said wire so Rusty here doesn't get expelled." "I tossed it in a dumpster somewhere along Greek Row last night." "Well, why didn't you just leave it in my nipple?" "We saw that campus cop and you told me to get rid of the evidence." "Denise, it's been a pleasure." "Rusty, let's go." "Hey, did, uh, we make out, by any chance?" "God, no." "You look too much like one of my ex-girlfriends." "Titans have beaten the Farmhands 17-14." "CRU thanks you..." "Hi, there." "You, uh..." "You hiding from me?" "No." "No, I was just..." "I was just admiring this girl's hair." " It's so soft." " OK." "It's because I have a kid." "That totally freaked you out, didn't it?" "And you're also Casey's professor." "And you're way older than me." "So the daughter was just the icing on the crazy cake." "OK, first of all, I'm not way older than you." "You make me sound like I'm Larry King." "Second, you're not my student." "Third, Casey is an adult." "I think she could handle..." "you and me dating." "Wait." "Who said anything about dating?" "We barely know each other." "That's exactly why I want to take you to dinner." "To get to know you." " Simon." " Well, think about it." "At the very least, it's a free meal." "Ok." " Bye." " Bye." "Let's just tie the goat to the back of the bus, then we'll hit the Dumpsters." "Can't wait." "Come on." "Thattagirl." "I forgot how to tie a sheepshank?" "Some Eagle Scout." "Rusty, we gotta get out of here, like right now." "Cartwright, is this your new girlfriend?" "Shut up, Trip." "Uh, that's a freaky three-way." " Damn it." "I did not need that." " Don't worry about it." " They'll get over it." " No, they won't." " They're your brothers." " And they're having serious issues" " with my loyalty." " You're the most loyal guy I know." "If they can't handle that," " that's their problem." " No, it's my problem." "Because while you've been out stealing goats and becoming a hero, I've become a villain." "And I don't know how to change it." " Goatboy!" "Can we get a pic?" " Yeah, sure." "I'll catch you later, Rusty." "Good luck finding that girl." "Here you go." " Thanks." " Bye." " Thank God I'm not pregnant." " I couldn't agree more." "Being a parent sucks." "Let's go back to being kids again." " See ya, Cap." " Did I say something wrong?" " I'm just tired." " Hey, talk to me." "You always get to be the kid." "And that means I always have to be the adult." "Well, you were pretty kid-like last night." "And we had unprotected sex." " Listen to me." "I sound like a mom." " No, you sound responsible." " You push me, and I like it." " But I don't." "And this is why it won't work between us." "Because one day you'll start resenting me for pushing." "And then I'll start to resent you for having to push." "And our whole relationship will implode, and I just..." "I love you too much to let that happen." "Damn it." " Why are you in our dumpster?" " I don't..." "Well, I'm looking for my wire." " I'm so confused." " Me, too." "I'm never drinking that much again." "I screwed up big time." "Join the club." "Cappie and I got drunk and studied." "Boy, he's really taking the major thing seriously, huh?" " What are you talking about?" " What are you talking about?" "Studying is our euphemism for sex, remember?" "Well, he declared a major: philosophy." " I don't believe it." " It's true." "He talked to this rich alum yesterday about a job." " He's even taking a 10am class." " Tuesday/Thursday?" " Monday/Wednesday/Friday." " Oh, my God!" "Calvin said Cappie hasn't even fallen asleep once." "Well, that was two weeks ago when I was dealing with the Dana situation." "I said I'd call him back, and I never did." "You kind of went on a little detour there." "But you were saying about Cappie and major..." "My wire!" "Well..." "All right, I gotta go clean the blood off this and return it to the lab." "I've gotta run, Case." "Rebecca, listen, before you go in there..." "Casey, spare me the lecture." "Chaperoning our events is part of your job." "Plus, I figured it's good practice for you since we all know you'll end up being a stay-at-home mom." "Not that there's anything wrong with that." "OK, good night." "Casey!" "Calvin!" " What are you doing here?" " I came to apologize, but I didn't want to make things worse by ringing the doorbell." " Look, Rusty, don't worry about it." " I want to worry about it." "I haven't been..." "I haven't been the best friend to you recently." "And you said your brothers question your loyalty, and I don't want you to question mine." "You've been wrapped up in your own stuff." " It happens." " Not to us." " What's been going on?" " There's nothing you can do." "I can listen." "Cappie, if you're planning on jumping out and scaring me, I'm really not in the mood." "Welcome to Cappieland!" "Where even the most frazzled of house mothers can be a kid for a night." "What'll it be?" "You wanna test your limits on the Puke-a-tron?" "Or fly to the moon on the Astrorider?" "Cap, before all that, Rusty told me..." "Not another word, young lady, or you won't get a piece of pie later." "Now, pick your ride." "I pick the Astrorider." " 'Cause it sounds naughty." " Good choice." "Come on." "Take a seat." "Coming around back." "Here we go." "Ok, let's get some height here." "Oh, yeah, I think this is high enough." "The truth is, I did resent you, Case." "You kept pushing me to think about the future, when I just wanted to live in the present." "But then you pushed me so high, I finally saw it." " Saw what?" " What my future could look like." "A job I actually like, friends that I love and the girl of my dreams on my arm." "Cap, this moment could be so much better if I was on the ground." "Not yet." "Right now, just let go and enjoy this." "I got you." " My shoe!" " Oh, I got it." " No, it's OK, I got it." " It's fine, it's right here." "Oh, God, Cappie!" "Oh, my God!" "Cappie!" "Are you OK?" "Are you all right?" "Gosh." "Sorry." " Hey, what's up, Ash?" " Hey." "You look like you're feeling better." "I pieced together most of my evening." " You did?" " Except I know something good happened to me last night." " Maybe some mysteries are never meant to be solved." " Maybe." " You look nice." " Thanks." "I'm heading out on the town." "Lots of victory parties tonight." " Well, have fun." " Thanks." "Ash, is that you?" "I'm really drunk." "I didn't know where else to go." " Casey and I got in a fight." " Did you eat in her car?" "'Cause I've been there." "I don't know what's wrong with me." "Hey, you were just hungry." "That's all." "I can't get a job." "I have $84 in my bank account." "And then I get in a huge fight with my best friend." "But on the plus side, a man who's old enough to be president bought me a drink." "That's funny 'cause you were president once of ZBZ." "The sad thing is I actually thought maybe this hot old guy could take care of me." "What is wrong with me?" "Nothing is wrong with you at all." "In fact, you are gonna do amazing things with your life." "How do you know that?" "Because... you are a human magnet." "And people are drawn to you." "They are?" "Yes." "Nipple!" "Um, Rusty, it's late." "Ok." "I..." "And I'm really drunk." "I don't know if you know that." "And I need some air." "Rusty, wait!" "You have some lipstick on your..." "You got it." "Wow." "You," " You look amazing." " Oh." "Thanks." " Shall we?" " We shall."