"Chapter 3 - "Schooltown Follies"" "♪ Don't know who she is or ♪" "♪ how she is or when, what, why she is ♪" "♪ but as for where she is, she is where we will go ♪" "♪ to Adelaide, to Adelaide ♪" "♪ come on and join ♪" " # the Adelaide parade #" " No." "♪ Adelaide, to Adelaide ♪" "♪ let's go to Adelaide's house ♪" "I need to fix that last part, but that's the idea." "So, Beatrice, you sing the high part." "Wirt, you sing the really" " high part." " What?" " Oh." " And ..." "Nobody is singing anything anymore." " And, Wirt, keep moving." " But I-I have to ... ugh." " All right." " But we have to do something fun." "You know, we really don't." "We can just keep walking silently, you know?" "And ... ugh." "Wirt, let's go." "Come on." " Sorry, sorry." " But shouldn't we ..." "Greg, don't you want to be more like your brother ..." " just always doing what you're told..." " Huh?" "...just a pathetic pushover who relies on others" " to make all his decisions?" " Hey!" "What?" " I'm not a pushover." " Hold on, Wirt." " Let me get to my point." " Fine." "See, Greg?" "No willpower whatsoever." " Hrmph!" " You need to be more like that." " But that doesn't really sound that fun." " The world is a miserable place, Greg." "Life isn't fun." " Then I'll do what I need to do, I guess." " Thank you." "We'll just focus on getting you guys to Adelaide's so I can wash my hands of this whole affair, and if you could pick up the pace a bit, that'd be great, okay?" "Okay?" "Hey, where's Greg." "Oh." "Uh, wondered off, I guess." " Cheese and crackers!" " We need to do our part to make the world a better place!" "Yeah." "Huh?" "Whoa!" "School?" "!" "Not today." "Greg!" "Greg!" "Greg?" "Oh." " Greg?" " Excuse me?" "Please, take your seat, children." "You're late." "You know the rules ... "once the bell has run, class has begun."" "Oh, sorry, everybody." "Sorry." "No, he doesn't have a brain." "He can't learn anything." "Let's go, Wirt." "Come on." "Here, boy." "What?" "Did you say something?" "I can't hear you because I'm too" " busy doing what I'm told." " What?" "What are you ..." " No, no." "Let's go." " Oh, no." "See, I'm a pushover, remember?" " I have to do what she tells me to do." " Ohh." "Wirt, your brother could be in trouble somewhere." "Mnh-mnh." "Yeah!" "Bluebird's have a short life span." "You two are literally killing me every moment I'm forced" " to spend with you." " Oh." "Young man, I will not stand for such nonsense in my classroom." "I got enough nonsense from that no good, two-timing, low-down handsome man of mine." "Oh, Jimmy Brown, why did you have to leave me so?" "And now, with my father threatening to close the school and that wild gorilla on the loose, why, Jimmy, I just have one thing to say..." "♪ "A" is for the apple that he gave to me ♪" "♪ but I found a worm inside ♪" "♪ "B" is for beloved that I... ♪" "Ouf." "That lady's got some baggage." "What's that?" " Young man, go to the dunce box." " Oh." "Sure, okay." " No, no." " Sure." "No, no." " Aw." " Now, where were we?" "Oh, yes." "♪ "G" is for the gentleman I thought he was ♪" "♪ when he first said hi ♪" "So, my theory is hot dogs are not actually dogs, regardless of what they teach you in school." "But you guys don't go to school, huh?" "I'm gonna stick with you guys." "Hey, I got an idea." "Let's play "two old cat."" "Do you guys know how to play "two old cat"?" "It's fun." "I'll show you." "Here we go." "Here's one old cat." "You found another one!" "Wait." "No." "I think that cat is too old." " Rowr." " Sorry, kitty." "We'll have to find another old cat." "Hey, Jeffrey, I think there's one behind you!" "Gorilla!" "Run!" "# And "Y," yes, why is the question that's on my mind # # oh, why?" "#" " Hey, dunce." "This is dreadful!" " Good." "I'm glad you feel that way." "♪ I remember like ... ♪" " Huh?" " Gorilla!" "Mealtime already?" "Well, come along children." " Huh?" " Mm-hmm." "We don't want to be late for mealtime." "My father will be visiting today, and we'll need to be on our best behavior." "Quick!" "In here!" "Oh, boy!" "Mealtime!" "This is way better than being chased by a gorilla." "Aw, what's the matter?" "Mm." "Kind of bland." " Hey, nobody ordered you to eat yet." " Yeah, but..." "Mm." "Hmm." "Ohh." "Hey!" "I know what to do!" "Here, Miss Langtree." "Play something like this." "Oh, like this?" "Mm... good enough." "♪ oh, potatoes and molasses ♪" "♪ if you want some, oh, just ask us ♪" "♪ they're warm and soft like puppies and socks ♪" "♪ filled with cream and candy rocks ♪" "♪ oh, potatoes and molasses ♪" "♪ they're so much sweeter than algebra class ♪" "♪ if your stomach is grumbling' ♪" "♪ and your mouth starts mumbling' ♪" "♪ there's only one thing to keep ♪" "♪ your brain from crumbling' ♪" "♪ oh, potatoes and molasses ♪" "♪ if you can't see 'em put on your glasses ♪" "♪ they're shiny and large like a fisherman's barge ♪" "♪ you know you eat enough when you start seeing stars ♪" "♪ oh, potatoes and molasses ♪" "♪ it's the only thing left on your task list ♪" "♪ they're short and stout, ♪" "♪ They'll make everyone shout ♪ ♪ for potatoes ♪" "♪ and molasses ♪" " # for potatoes and ... #" " That's enough!" " Father." " Is this what I've been paying for?" "!" " Hey, we just wanted to have a little fun." " I didn't invest in this school for fun." "I thought we were trying to do important work here, teaching animals to count and spell." "We are!" "Oh, please, father, don't close the school." " It won't happen again." " I should say it won't." " This..." " Pbht!" "...this and this are all coming with me." "Now send them to bed!" "You heard father." "Off to bed with you." "Mm." "I just wanted to have fun, change the world, and make it a better place." "But I just made everything worse." "Okay, Wirt, I'll admit it ... you seem like a pushover, but you're not." " Oh?" " Deep down in your heart, you're a stubborn jerk." "When are you gonna give this up?" "Maybe never." "Maybe I'll never give this up." "Hmm." "Yeah!" "Wirt's right ... never give up!" "Come on, Wirt." " Let's go save the day." " Okay, if you say so." "Come on." "So, what's the plan, Greg?" "Plan?" "Ohh." "I don't know." "Ohh!" "Who would've thought making a primer school for animals was a bad idea?" "My life savings, my home ..." "everything I had went into that dear, dear school." "And now I'm forced to sell these instruments just to keep it open." "All the while that loathsome Jimmy Brown is off gallivanting who knows where!" "Not to mention that wild gorilla on the loose." "If only something would go right for a change." "Okay, I think he's asleep." " Let's go steal his stuff." " What?" "The instruments!" "They've been stolen!" "Who would do such a thing?" "!" "Huh?" " Here you go." " Oh, here you go, sonny." "What is this?" "It's a benefit concert for the school." "Ah, isn't it grand ... all these fine people giving out of the goodness of their hearts?" "Not like my Jimmy Brown." " Ohh, here we go." " All he ever did was steal" " my heart away." " Gorilla!" "Young man, do something!" "Uh..." "Whoa!" " Finally." " Jimmy?" "That's right, darlin'." "I was the gorilla." " But why did you do it?" " Got a job in the circus so's" "I could finally buy ya that wedding ring." "But when I got stuck in the dang suit, everybody was too" " doggone scared to help me out." " Aw, Jimmy." " Oh!" " Darlin'." "I guess the world really is as sweet as potatoes and molasses." "♪ oh, potatoes and molasses ♪" "♪ if you want some... ♪" "So, want me to tell Greg it's time to get going?" "Nah, let him have his fun." "♪ filled with cream and candy and rocks ♪" " Hey, Wirt." " Yeah?" " Tie your shoe." " Hmm?" "Oh." "Mm." "Okay." "♪ ...algebra class ♪" "♪ if your stomach is grumblin' and your mouth... ♪" "Chapter 4 - "Songs of the Dark Lantern"" "Stop!" "No!" "Oh, no!" "The beast is upon me!" " Shh!" " Greg, is there a beast out there?" "Mmm..." "I found a duck." "Do you know how to make eggs from a duck?" "I'm hungry." " What about the beast?" " The beast is upon me!" "I didn't see any beast." "That driver is nuts." "Mmm, nuts." " Whew!" "Well, that's good." " Good?" "!" "That crazy driver's taking us way off course!" " Really?" " Yeah, who knows where we are by now with that guy acting all bananas." "Ooh, banana nut duck bread." " Whoa-ah!" " Well, finally some good luck." "Let's go to this creepy tavern and ask for some directions." "But..." "But it's creepy." "Why don't you guys go ask for directions, and I'll just wait out ..." "no, wait, I-I don't want to be out here by myself." "How about you guys ..." " Just go to the tavern!" " Okay!" " But you ask for directions." " Fine, yeah, I'll do everything." "I'm hungry." " Go on!" " I-It's stuck." "Oh." "E-Excuse me, there." "Excuse me." "Hmm?" "You." "Wait." "Here." " I'll get some food." " Well, at least it has music." "Well, hey, there, peach pot." "Whatcha doing around ..." " hey, what's that bird you got there?" " It's a ..." "I am Beatrice!" "These two sweet kids and I got a bit lost in the ..." "No birds allowed in my tavern!" "No birds allowed in your ..." "It's a bad omen when a bluebird enters through your door." "It's bad luck!" "Lady, bluebirds are good luck!" "We bring joy and happiness to the ..." "Good luck, bad luck ..." "I don't need any of it!" "Curse you, lady!" "Curse you!" "You'll die someday, and I'll laugh ..." "laugh!" " Ohh!" " Forget this." "I'm out of here." " Wirt, you get directions." " W-Wait, no." " I-I don't want to ..." " Just do it!" "Who are you two anyway, bringing bad luck to my tavern?" "I'm Wirt, and this is Gregory." "And that's a horse!" "That's great, but who are you?" "I'm..." "Wirt." "I'm ..." "I'm just a-a guy, I-I guess." "Um, w-what do you mean?" " Well, he's the butcher..." " I'm the butcher." " ...the baker..." " Yeah!" "...the midwife the master and apprentice... the tailor." "and I'm the tavern keeper." "Who are you?" "!" "I am hungry!" "I-I-I don't know." "I don't really like labels." "I'm just sort of, like, myself, you know?" " Maybe he's simple." " No, I-I'm just ..." "I'm just lost." "See, w-we're trying to get to ..." " I'm the highwayman." " Okay, good to know." " Well, so, you see ..." " # I'm the highwayman #" "♪ I make ends meet ♪" "♪ just like any man ♪" "♪ I work with my hands ♪" "♪ if you cross my path ♪" "♪ I'll knock you out ♪" "♪ Drag you off the road ♪" "♪ steal your shoes from off your feet ♪" "♪ I'm the highwayman ♪" "♪ And I make ends mee-e-e-e-t ♪" "Hey." "Are you wearing lipstick?" "♪ La la la la ♪" "Hmm?" "Who's out there?" "♪ Chop the wood to light the fire ♪" "What kind of person goes out chopping trees in the middle of a thunderstorm at night?" " # Light that fiery fire #" " What kind of a person talks to a horse?" "Ooh Ah." "Hmm." " Excuse me?" " Huh?" "I was wondering if you knew the way ..." "uh, I mean, I-I'm ..." " her name is Adelaide, and ..." " Oh, it's a girl you're after, eh?" "No!" "I-I mean, yes, but ..." "Oh, you're not the witless simple-minded fool everybody takes you for." " Everyone thinks I'm ..." " You're the young lover." " What?" "Young lover?" "No, uh ..." " If you really want to get" " with this Adelaide gal..." " I-I don't." "I-I mean, I-I ... well, here's what you do." "♪ Write a loving letter, boy ♪" "♪ that swoops and sweeps and curls ♪" "♪ calligrapher's just the thing to help you win your girl ♪" "♪ then you'll need to dress up smart ♪" "♪ the tailor's here by chance ♪" "♪ He'll stitch your trousers, hole your belt ♪" "♪ in fine couture of France ♪" "♪ your shoes, my goodness, how they're worn, ♪" "♪ but you're too young to know ♪" "♪ Nothing courts a woman's scorn more than scuffs on the toe ♪" "♪ The cobbler can attend to that ♪" "♪ Meanwhile, you must have cake ♪" "♪ The baker and patissier need work for goodness sake ♪" "♪ high, dee, diddly, um-de-dum-de-day ♪" "♪ What a merry time we'll have upon your wedding day ♪" " What?" " # High, dee, diddly, #" "♪ um-de-dum-de-day ♪" "♪ there's work for all when little boys get married ♪" "No, no, no, no. y-you guys, I-I-I'm not getting married." "I'm just trying to find ... ♪ That pointy cone upon your head ♪" " Oh, no, please." " # You can't be wearing that #" "Mm." "If I have to be outside, then those jokers do, too." "Oh, hey, Beatrice!" "Do you want some food, too?" "No." "How's Wirt doing getting directions?" "Mm, pretty good." "♪ High, dee, diddly, um-de-dum-de-day ♪" "♪ What a merry time we'll have upon your wedding day ♪" "♪ High, dee, diddly ♪" "What about that woodsman?" "I bet he knows these woods better than anybody, huh?" "All right, horse, good riddance!" "Lover!" "Lover!" "No, y-you guys, Adelaide" " isn't ..." "I-I'm just ..." " Young lover, sing us your love song!" " Love song?" " Yeah, lover!" "Sing us your love song!" "No, I-I-I don't have a ..." " Sing, lover, sing!" " No." "Sing, lover, sing!" "Sing, lover, sing!" "Sing, lover, sing!" " Sing, lover, sing!" " Sing, boy, sing!" "♪ My name is Wirt, and his name ♪" "♪ is Greg ♪ ♪ we're related 'cause my mom ♪" "♪ Remarried and then gave birth to him with my stepdad ♪" "♪ We're not from around here ♪" "♪ can you all give me ♪" "♪ Some directions today?" "♪" "♪ So we can be on our ♪" "♪ wa-a-a-y ♪" " This ain't no love song." " It's a metaphor." " Keep it together, tailor." " Hey!" " Uh, yes?" " I know what you are!" " You're a pilgrim!" " What?" "What, like the ... the guys who eat turkey and cranberry sauce?" " No, you're a pilgrim!" " A pilgrim?" "You're a traveler on a sacred journey." "You're the master of your own destiny." " The hero of your own story!" " A pilgrim." "Tell us your feats, pilgrim!" "What other challenges" " have you overcome?" " Regale us with your travels, pilgrim!" "One time, Wirt fell on a gorilla." "And helped me find this frog." " More!" "Tell us more!" " Tell us more!" "Let the cat out of the bag!" "We want to hear it!" "And, oh, uh, I met this helpful woodsman who told us which direction to go to avoid beast." " The beast!" " The beast." " Oh, goodness." " Oh, you guys have heard of" " the beast, too?" " We all know the beast, pilgrim." "♪ He lurks out there in the Unknown ♪" "♪ seeking those who are far from home ♪" "♪ hoping never to let you return ♪" "♪ ooh-ooh, better beware ♪" "♪ ooh-ooh, the beast is out there ♪" "♪ ooh-ooh, better be wise and don't believe his lies ♪" "♪ for once your will begins to spoil ♪" "♪ he'll turn you to a tree of oil ♪" "♪ and use you in his lantern for to burn ♪" "Wait, wait, wait!" "Lantern?" "The woodsman was the guy with the weird lantern, not the beast." "Pilgrim, he who carries the dark lantern must be the beast." "What?" "No, the woodsman's a good guy." "He warned us of the beast and told us which direction" " to go to avoid him." " And now you're more" " lost than ever, huh?" " Yeah, but..." "Oh, yeah, hey, can you give us some directions?" "Our friend Beatrice is trying to take us to Adelaide of the pasture, the good woman of the woods." " She can help us get home." " You don't need directions, pilgrim." " You follow that compass inside your heart." " Uh..." "No, I think we need directions." " Beatrice!" " Go save your friend and get yourself home!" " Pilgrim!" " You got it!" "Uh..." "Okay." "Never say die, never say die!" "Oh, boy, I guess I'm really doing this." "Horse, I'm just gonna pretend like I can ride you, all right?" "Beatrice!" "Beatrice?" " Another one of those trees." " Halt!" "It's you!" " Hey, Mr. Woodsman!" " I told you to leave these woods!" "Beatrice!" "You're turning her into an edelwood tree!" "You were the beast all along!" "Huh?" "!" "Whoa!" "Huh?" "!" " What is this?" " Greg, get Beatrice!" "What are you doing?" "!" "Boys, the beast is upon you!" "Agh!" "Oh!" " Beatrice, you all right?" " Yeah, I just ..." "I saw a weird shadow and then stupidly flew into a tree and got knocked out." "Oh, well, we're all right now." "Wirt was amazing!" "He sang a song, rode a horse, and saved you from the axe guy!" "He's the pilgrim!" "That's all well and good, but you were supposed" " to get directions." " I did." "We just got directions from Fred before you woke up." " Who?" " Oh, uh, Beatrice, meet Fred the horse." " Nice to horse your acquaintance." " You can talk?" "!" "It seems you're running out of oil, woodsman." "Why not let me take the lantern for awhile?" "Begone, beast!" "I've fought you for the lantern before, and I'll fight you again!" "No need for violence, woodsman, but be sure to keep it lit, or your daughter's flame will go out... forever." "Now, what direction did those children go?" "You leave those children be!" " Beast!" " # La la la la #" " Beast!" " # La la la la #" "♪ Chop the wood to light the fire ♪"