"OK, one last time." "These are small but the ones out there are far away." "Small." "Far away." "Oh, forget it!" " Are you all right, Your Grace?" " Yes, l-I..." "I had a minor heart attack last year." "I have to take it easy." "I got a bit of a fright there." "(Ted) Right." "It's not a problem but if you could just give us a warning before you do anything sudden." "(Yells)" "Dougal, what are you doing?" "!" "Sorry, Ted." "I just remembered - Aliens is on after the news." "Who'd have thought being hit by lightning would land you in hospital?" "What?" "What?" "Of course it can land you in hospital." "Well, it's not usualy serious, is it, Ted?" "I was hit by lightning a few times, I never had to go to hospital." "Yes, but you're different from most people." "All that happened to you was balloons kept sticking to you." "You're not going to believe this!" "Clint Eastwood has been arrested for a crime..." "Oh, wait, no." "It's a film." "We'll toss for it." "Whoever wins can go as Elvis." "OK, all right." "Right." "Heads or tails?" "Heads or tails, Dougal?" "Heads." "No, tails." "Heads." "Tails." "Heads." "Dougal, you have to give me a choice between the two." "Sorry, Ted." "I just got a bit excited." "Here we go again." "Heads or tails?" " Heads." " Are you sure?" "Absolutey pos..." "Tails." "Heads." "Tails." "Heads." " Dougal!" "Calm down." " Heads." "Tails." "Heads." "Tails." "Heads." "Dougal, are you all right?" "I am." "I'm fine." "I'm just not the best at making decisions." " Look..." " Or am I?" "Dougal, you should've seen him." "He's just a shadow of a sheep." "I'm not surprised, Ted." "If I was a sheep, I'd be watching my back now." "Why?" "Because of the beast." "They say it's as big as four cats and it's got a retractable leg so as it can leap up at you better." "And do you know what?" "It lights up at night." "And it's got four ears - two for listening and two are backup ears." "And its claws are as big as cups." "And it's got a great fear of stamps." "Mrs Doyle was telling me it's got magnets on its tail - so if you're made out of metal, it can attach itself to you." " And it has no mouth and four arses." " Dougal!" "Remember that film where your man has his head transplanted onto a fy and the fy's head goes onto the man?" " Oh, yes, what was that called?" " Out Of Africa, I think." "You know, your man has the head of the fy and he's chasing his wife all over the place." "She's trying to hide the jam and stuff so he won't get stuck in it." " I have to stop you there." " Yes, Ted?" "No reason." "I just have to stop you."