"[Baby crying]" "Next in line!" "What is your reason for visiting Urkesh?" "Woman:" "I'm going to see my sister." "Next in line!" "What is your reason for visiting Urkesh?" "Man:" "To see my family." "What is your reason for visiting Urkesh?" "Woman:" "Travel for work." "What is your reason for visiting Urkesh?" "I am going there to die." "Excuse me." "You'll never believe who just applied for a travel visa." "[Foghorn blows]" "[Pigeon cooing]" "[Grunting]" "[Wheezing]" "[Exhales deeply]" "[Toaster dings]" "Is that the telephone directory?" "If that's your way of telling me you want the sports section..." "There are dozens of Weinraubs living in this very city." "The chances are I'm related to one of them." "[Sighs]" "Of course." "How thoughtless of me." "Now that you know your original last name..." "I can find my family tree." "Whoa, whoa, whoa." "Hey." "Here's one." "Lives on Park Avenue." "Park Avenue!" "We can start uptown and work our way down." "Wait a minute." "No, no." "No." "I'm the one who's being thoughtless now." "I..." "Don't beat yourself up." "I'm used to being ignored at the breakfast table." "No, no, what I mean is," "I don't need a family tree to tell me who my real pops is." "Oh." "Nor I my real son." "Henry:" "Why do we feel compelled to trace our roots?" "Those names in the family tree are just that... names..." "And yet the kinship we feel to them is powerful." "Does the fact that we're rooted in history make us feel more secure in our present?" "But what if our family trees are more like vines, twining aimlessly throughout the ages?" "[Police radio chatter]" "False alarm, doc." "Rookie who called it in flagged it as a homicide." " Lucas:" "Yep." " Jo:" "No sign of foul play, though." "Other than pigeons pooping all over him." "[Pigeons flapping]" "Flying rats!" "How can you be so certain?" "I'm no expert, doc, but I'm pretty sure it was the lung cancer that got him." "Aha." "Yes, now I see it." "Swelling of the hands, jaundice of the skin, and hair loss..." "Telltale signs of radiation therapy." "Well done, detective." "The guy was wearing a medical bracelet." "We called the number, got an oncologist." "Right." "That would work, too." "Okay." "Well, I'm famished." "Anybody up for a bite?" "Uh, will you hold on a moment, if you don't mind?" "Lucas, what would you say that is?" "Old appendectomy scar?" "The shape..." "It's rather unusual." "Must have had a sucky surgeon." "Or else his physician didn't have a proper operating theater." "We mustn't presume anything, Lucas." "Let's take him back to the lab for further analysis." "[Train whistle blows]" "__" "Well." "This is lovely." "I can't believe we're finally alone." "I do hope Abraham's all right." "[Scoffs] A month with my parents in Oxfordshire?" "I'm sure he's in heaven." "This trip was supposed to be about us." "Henry..." "I was thinking..." "What if we were to have a baby?" "[Sighs] Look, we've been over this before." "The pain of bringing a child into the world..." "Just think of how much joy Abraham's brought to our lives." "I thought this trip was about us." "[Chuckles]" "[Knock on door]" "Are you the doctor?" "Come with me." "[Train whistle blows]" "[Boy moaning]" "Hello, young man." "Now, let me see." "[Groans loudly]" "It's acute appendicitis." "We have to operate." "[Groans]" "Doctor." "Thank you." "Dare I ask what that is?" "Starter fluid." "It contains diethyl ether." "It's a general anesthetic." "Careful... don't breathe it in." "I need you awake for this." "[Boy groaning]" "Where are the child's parents?" "His appendix has burst, and his life is..." "Is more precious than you know." "You will save the boy..." "Or else." "Well, if you're gonna threaten me, you might as well tell me who he is." "He is the son of the king." "Heir to the throne of Urkesh." "[Groans]" "Courage." "You're the son of a king." "[Rattling]" "Don't suppose you can tell the conductor to slow down?" "Lucas:" "Excuse me, m-ma'am." "We don't usually identify the bodies in person." "Uh..." "Please." "Ma'am, do you mind telling us your relation to the deceased?" "He was my husband." "Armen Aronov..." "Son of Amin Aronov." "So, you're from Urkesh?" "You have heard of it?" "We're sorry for your loss." "You should feel sorry for Urkesh." "Today, they lost their king." "Da zdravstvuyet korol." "Spasibo." "It's Russian for, uh, "long live the king."" "I don't get it, Henry." "A person would have to live 10 lives to pick up everything you have." "Or just one very long one." "[Bells jingle]" "Abe:" "So, it turns out that one of those Weinraubs in the phone book..." "Larry..." "Is a distant cousin on my father's side." "Oh, and Larry said that we have another cousin, who's a dry-cleaning baron in the Buffalo area." "Hey, what if I turned out to be related to someone really famous?" "You know, like Charlemagne, or, uh, Napoleon, or George Washington." "I don't believe any of those gentlemen are Jewish." "Sorry." "All right." "Uh, what about Albert Einstein or Karl Marx or Groucho Marx?" "All this after one day of research." "Who knows what else I'll dig up?" "Watching you do all this makes me wonder..." "Did you ever want children?" "Well, I..." "I had a few close calls, you know." "I... uh, uh..." "I always expected the urge to kick in, but it just never did." "Do you ever think about your legacy?" "What do you mean, an heir?" "Now, why would I need an heir?" "I have you." "So, uh, part of me, spiritually, will go on forever." "That's very sweet of you." "I think." "Can I ask you a question?" "Sure." "What do you want with my ring?" "Your ring?" "Yes, my ring..." "The one you and mom gave me when you ditched me to go on the Orient Express." "Look, this ring belonged to the king of Urkesh." "Really?" "Must be worth a fortune." "Compared to its sentimental value, that's nothing." "I'm sorry, Abe." "I'm going to return it to its rightful owner." "[Scoffs] Urkesh..." "Is that a real country?" "According to Wikipedia, it is..." "And with a turbulent history." "Their king was deposed in a coup that left him and his entire family dead." "Minus the dead guy downstairs." "Well, he has been living here in exile under an assumed name all these years." "In a rent-controlled three-story walk-up." "Small countries can make big stinks." "Call the consulate, see what they want to do with the body." "Henry's still working on it." "An 80-year-old man with lung cancer who died on a park bench..." "Is there something I'm missing here?" " No, Loo." " Good." "Let's just try to put this one to bed without creating an international incident." "[Knock on door]" "Doctor." "How can I help you?" "It belonged to your husband." "It belongs to you and your children." "My husband and I were never blessed to have any." "Where did you get this?" "In addition to being a medical examiner," "I dabble in antiques." "Mind if I come in?" "Yes, of course." "[Classical music playing softly]" "Proper cup." "My husband used to joke that tea was the only thing I could cook." "[Chuckles]" "Beautiful samovar. 18th century?" "One of the few heirlooms that survived the revolution." "But you didn't come here to talk antiques." "No." "I know this is going to seem like an odd question, but..." "Did your husband have a good life?" "You would think that a man who was born to sit on a throne would have resented this life, but not my husband." "He left this world without regrets." "Well, no..." "One." "He wanted to return to Urkesh before he died." "How was he going to go overseas if he was receiving radiation therapy?" "I'm sorry..." "My husband elected not to have treatment." "How else could he have been exposed to such toxic levels of..." "Excuse me." "What have you done with the king?" "!" "Whoa!" "don't yell at me." "They took him." "[Elevator bell dings]" "Hold that elevator." "Hey!" "Hi." "Hey." "Mind if I scooch in here?" "Thanks, guys." "Oh!" "Room for one more?" "[Sighs] There we go." "[Guns rattle]" "I can assure you, I am unarmed." "I'm clean, too, if you guys were wondering." "[Device beeping]" "Man:" "What is that?" "It measures radiation." "Excuse me." "Here." "Sorry." "Official..." "[Strained] Excuse me." "Hey." "Coming through." "There we go." "[Beeping intensifies] What does that mean?" "He was poisoned..." "By an isotope whose half-life is tens of thousands of years, which means everyone aboard this elevator is technically being irradiated, too." "[Men gasp]" "Whoa." "[Elevator bell dings]" "[Men speaking Russian]" "What the hell's going on?" "Well, doc thinks we're looking at a murder." "Kings aren't murdered." "They're assassinated." "Well?" "What are you waiting for?" "We've got work to do." "I think I'll take the stairs." "[Elevator bell dings]" " What is your reason for visiting Urkesh?" " Yes, we are visiting family." "Next in line!" "[Scanner whines]" "[Scanner beeps]" "Officer:" "Arms up, please." "[Device whirring]" "Remove, please." "Thank you." "Henry, what are you doing?" "A geiger counter?" "Really?" "Well, anything or anyone that comes into contact with the poison will have trace amounts of radiation." "Well, as long as we are in this consulate, we are guests on foreign soil..." "Making this my first time out of the country." "You should get your passport stamped." "Well, not all of us can go to the real Urkesh." "When were you there?" "It was on my honeymoon." "You and Abigail?" "Yes." "That's a great story, Henry." "We went from Budapest to Istanbul on the Orient Express." "Now, that's insanely romantic." "Where did you honeymoon?" "Sean and I went to the Taj Mahal." "[Chuckles]" "As in Trump Taj, Atlantic city." "[Chuckles]" "We were both busy working on cases when we got married, and we thought we'd always plan our real one." "Guess you never know what fate has in store, huh?" "[Baby crying]" "[Bell clanging, train whistle blows]" "[Exhales deeply] So, where were we?" "Debating the liabilities and virtues of expanding our family." "Don't be a bore, Henry." "[Knock on door]" "[Moans]" "[Laughing] No." "No." "Mm." "Don't answer it." "Is there something the matter with our young patient?" "The young prince is recovering quite comfortably." "My apologies." "Um..." "Your Highness." "You saved my son's life." "I bow to you." "[Chuckles]" "[Abigail chuckles]" "How can I ever repay you?" "At the very least, join me for dinner." "We'd be delighted." "Whoa!" "Excuse me." "Waiter:" "Pardon me, Your Majesty." "The champagne needs a moment to chill." "And the coup de grace..." "Roast yak shank." "You had no idea your king lived seven blocks from this consulate all these years?" "He was no king of mine." "Don't you think it's strange that the king wanted to return to the country that murdered his entire family?" "I imagine a king forever expects to get what he wants." "Yet you approved his visa?" "Urkesh is governed by laws now, not the whims of a monarchy." "I am merely a bureaucrat of the system." "A well-paid one, obviously." "Henry?" "You are aware that the FBI keeps track of all foreign emissaries working on American soil, monitoring their personal finances?" "Sit down." "This is a lovely piece." "Dates back to the reign of Nicholas I, am I right?" "It is a... reproduction." "The original would be extremely valuable." "If you don't mind..." "Henry, why don't you give him his vase?" "Of course." "[Breathes deeply]" "If you'll excuse me, I must be getting back to work." "Some cultural attaché you are." "Look who's hungry." "I will talk to you, but only if you promise to leave the FBI out of it." "Why couldn't we talk in your office?" "Man:" "That will be $7.50, please." "Thank you, buddy." "The monarchy is not a popular subject in my office." "Better to talk on American soil." "So, what did you want to tell us about the king?" "All I know is that he comes to visit me, says he's dying, wants to go back to the old country, so if I could please expedite his paperwork..." "What's the going rate for that?" "He reached into his pocket, offered me a diamond the size of a grape." "Figured it was a fair price for the exchange." "Now do me a favor and go before someone sees us talking." "A diamond the size of a grape?" "Sounds less like assassination, more like good old-fashioned greed." "Hold this." "Um... what is it?" "It's the old guy's stomach contents." "[Cellphone ringing]" "[Device clicking, beeping]" "[Cellphone beeps] What's up?" "Hey." "Did you get an I.D. on the poison?" "Polonium-210." "Did you ever hear of polonium-210?" "A radioactive isotope discovered by Marie Curie in 1898." "It was later used to assassinate Alexander Litvinenko." "Well, that's what they found in the king's stomach." "What else did you find?" "I don't know..." "Food?" "Put Lucas on." "Hey." "It's the doc." "Oh." "Yeah." "Hey, boss." "Lucas, in exacting detail," "I need you to describe what food you found in the victim's stomach." "Okay." "[Sniffs]" "Smells like a stew." "I'm detecting notes of curry and some sort of a gamey meat odor, like a-a goat, maybe." "Could it be yak?" "Yeah." "I've never tasted yak, but sure." "Why?" "It's the national dish of Urkesh..." "A meal that a homesick man would eat before dying." "So, where in New York could one find authentic yak stew?" "Taste of Urkesh." "How did you know?" "It's where the victim ate the day he died, according to his credit card." "Very clever, Hanson." "Thank you." "[Cellphone closes]" "Excuse me." "Are you the owner?" "Mm." "Do you recognize this guy?" "[Eastern European accent] No." "According to his credit card, he was here two days ago." "Who are you... food inspectors?" "Close." "NYPD." "I take it you're from Urkesh." "What gave me away?" "Mind if I ask your feelings on your country's former monarchy?" "I'm an American now." "I have no feelings." "That was a lifetime ago." "Some scars never heal, such as lingchi, a torture invented by the Han Dynasty..." "Literally a death by 1,000 cuts, a technique employed by the royal guard, if I'm not mistaken." "You must have been but a child." "Why do you think they let me live?" "[Device beeps]" "I forgot to turn it off." "[Beeping] You can't come in here." "[Beeping intensifies] The bowl absorbed trace amounts of radiation." "Looks like we're gonna have to call that health inspector after all." "What are you talking about?" "The king of Urkesh was killed in your restaurant." "Let me summarize your list of woes..." "We got motive, opportunity, and now we got a murder weapon." "A bowl with trace amounts of polonium-210..." "That's the poison we found in the victim's body." "You wanted the king dead, so just tell us how you did it." "If I knew he was heir to the throne of Urkesh, you think I would have poisoned him, like a woman?" "No need to get sexist, pal." "I would have stabbed him in the heart with a knife and told him to rot in hell for what he did." "What exactly did he do?" "Guy was just a kid, same age as you, when the revolution went down." "He had his father's blood in his veins and my people's blood on his hands." "Okay, supposing you didn't do it." "Someone in your restaurant did." "Why don't you talk to the young woman he was dining with?" "Young woman?" "His wife?" "Green eyes, American accent, acted more like a mistress." "What makes you say that?" "The way they were talking..." "Friendly at first." "Then she got upset, started yelling." "Then she left." "Without eating anything?" "Any idea where she was headed?" "She shouted at him..." "Something about going back to her cage." "So, what are we looking for here, huh?" "Lipstick on the collar, hickey on the neck?" "Swab his pudendum to see if you can recover the mistress's DNA." "Dude." "He's..." "He's 70 years old." "You don't think he was actually, like, having sex sex?" "I've known men who have remained sexually active very late in life." "[Slaps clipboard] Okay." "[Sighs]" "That's interesting." "Oh, thank God." "Look at his hand under the black light." "How curious..." "A birdcage." "You were right, doc." "This guy does like to get his freak on." "Excuse me?" "That stamp right there is from the Gilded Cage..." "Hot new club in the Meatpacking District." "Bouncer wouldn't let me in last weekend, but guess who's rolling up with a search warrant." "Booyah." "How'd you like to go clubbing?" "I just said "booyah."" "Oh, you're talking to Henry." "Got it." "Yeah, I recognize him." "You sure?" "Sure I'm sure." "Old people tend to stand out around here." "No offense." "Was he with someone here that night..." "A young woman with green eyes?" "You mean Lydia?" "You know her?" "She's at the bar." "Excuse me." "Is your name Lydia?" "Yeah." "You're a cocktail waitress." "You're observant. [Chuckles]" "Uh, do you mind, uh, answering a few questions?" "Sure." "I've been working here about a year, putting myself through school." "Whatever this is about, [Chuckling] I'm pretty sure you've got the wrong girl." "You recognize him." "How?" "Uh..." "Well, he started coming in a month ago..." "By himself." "Always did the same thing..." "Ordered a coke, nursed it, then left a huge tip." "Look, why are you even asking about him?" "'Cause you're the last one to see him alive." "He's dead?" "What happened?" "He was poisoned." "Mind telling us what you were doing dining with the victim?" "He was my father." "Or, at least, that's what he said." "He and his wife never had children." "Right." "My mom was not his wife." "[Chuckles]" "I never knew her, either." "I grew up in foster care." "And then, one day at work, this nice, old guy just shows up and tells me what every foster kid dreams of - giving me up was a mistake, that I wasn't just an orphan, that I was special." "That still doesn't explain why you were fighting at a restaurant." "Well, then he dropped all this crazy stuff on me..." "Like how he was secretly a king and wanted to take me back to his old kingdom and give me all these diamonds." "Did he show you the diamonds?" "I've seen enough diamonds to know that ones that big aren't real." "And clearly, he was a fake, too." "He told me that I had to keep everything a secret because if his wife found out about me, she would kill him." "[Chuckling] You don't believe me." "I don't blame you." "It's so ridiculous." "Lydia, I, uh, I'm not sure how tell you this..." "Because everything he said was true." "Your father was a king..." "The last king of Urkesh." "But that would make me..." "A princess." "[Voice breaking] And an orphan." "All over again." "Yo, Lydia." "Break's over." "Sorry." "Looks like this princess is back on the clock." "No, no, no, not that one." "Just say the one before." "[Scottish accent] Many a mickle makes a muckle." "[Laughing] I still can't get it." "Hey, Henry!" "Come." "Say hi." "Hi." "Aye, aye, min." "That's my cousin Lachlann. [Lok-lahn]" ""Lohk-lunn."" "Yeah, like I said." "[Sheep bleating]" "I have to go now and take care of me sheep." "Oh." "Cheerio the nou, Abraham." "Cheerio to you, cousin." "[Beep] [Chuckles]" "How do you like that?" "That's my third cousin twice removed, mm?" "He's Scottish." "Well, no wonder I love scotch." "Turns out my family has their own tartan pattern." "Hey, do you think I could pull off a kilt?" "You know, I-I have the legs for it." "[Chuckles]" "Henry." "What's wrong?" "[Groans]" "I just worry that [Sighs] your mother and I deprived you." "Of what?" "That... family." "All the aunts and uncles and cousins on the Morgan side whom you never met." "Well, I never met them because my dad was immortal." "Would have made family reunions a bit awkward, wouldn't you think?" "[Chuckling] No, no." "The three of us were all the family I ever wanted." "Did it ever get lonely for you, being an only child?" "Other than the summer you left me on that crappy farm in England?" "No." "Why?" "Did... did you and mom ever think about having other kids?" "There was a moment." "[Bells clanging]" "King:" "Look what I've done..." "Bored your bride to sleep on your wedding night." "[Chuckles]" "I'm sure she'll forgive you." "Our wedding night was a decade ago." "I thought this was your honeymoon." "It is. [Sighs]" "We just never got around to taking it the first time." "You mean children got in the way?" "[Chuckles]" "Yes." "Yes." "One..." "Abraham." "Hm." "A gift for young Abraham." "It was given to me by my father, and to him by his father, going back to the first of our line." "[Scoffs]" "N-no." "Your son should have this." "I don't wish to burden my son." "Do you know what I wish for him?" "That he grows up to be something other than a king." "[Chuckles]" "That's why he's leaving Urkesh." "And you?" "I will return to face whatever fate awaits me..." "A sacrifice I will make happily, knowing that my son may follow his own dreams, whatever they are." "Isn't that what every father wishes?" "And mother." "Good night, doctor." "Best of luck to you both." "Henry?" "Yes." "Sorry." "Thank you." "I-I'm good." "Thank you." "I'm..." "[Clears throat]" "So..." "How can I help you?" "Um..." "Just a couple quick questions about your husband." "Look, we know this isn't easy for you." "But were you aware that he was ever, uh..." "You know, unfaithful?" "That was 25 years ago." "Do you mind telling us the circumstances?" "When my husband and I realized that we could not have children..." "I became very depressed." "Having lost his throne, he had already suffered so much." "Then, to know that the bloodline would die with him..." "I blamed myself." "Even after you found out about his illegitimate child?" "What did you say?" "[Cup clanks]" "He didn't tell you about his daughter?" "When your husband found out he was dying, he reached out, offered his daughter a bunch of money." "Diamonds, actually." "Part of the royal treasure he used to grease the consulate into issuing his visa." "[Breathing heavily] Did you kill him to keep him from leaving the country with them?" "You think I killed him?" "My husband was everything to me!" "In another life, I would have been a queen," "I would have lived in a palace." "Does this look like a palace to you?" "!" "Do you think I care for riches?" "!" "[Diamonds clatter]" "I married my husband for love, and I loved him until the day he died..." "[Gasps] Is she having a heart attack?" "I'll call an ambulance." "She'll be dead long before they get here." "[Device beeping] She's been poisoned..." "Polonium." "I need a length of tubing." "Okay." "For what?" "To pump her stomach, obviously." "Right." "Right." "[Groaning]" "Excellent." "Ambulance is on its way." "[Grunts]" "What are you doing?" "We need to get the radiation out of her system before it's absorbed." "[Inhales deeply]" "Here." "[Spits] Here it comes." "That's it." "Excellent." "Well done." "[Coughing]" "Is she gonna be okay?" "[Sighs]" "God save the queen." "Ugh." "Some things in this job, you wish you could unsee." "Our killer used bolt cutters to get in." "Yeah, and left all those diamonds." "It wasn't about money." "It was about ending the monarchy forever..." "In and out within a few seconds." "All he had to do was slip polonium into the tea." "Hanson:" "Well, [Sighs] maybe we can pull a print." "We don't have to." "Our killer's hands were stained with ink." "It's the same shade used at the consulate." "Someone must have recognized the king standing in line." "And got the queen's address off his visa application." "The consulate only stamped the thumbs." "The person who broke in here had ink on multiple fingers." "No, we're not looking for someone who was standing in line with the king." "We're looking for the person who fingerprinted him." "As my assistant explained to you on the phone, we are not obliged to share with you the personal information of consular employees." "Even if they commit murder?" "Do I need to remind you that you are on Urkesh soil, doctor?" "If we could just talk to the person who takes the fingerprints..." "And who killed the heir to the throne of Urkesh." "Allegedly." "I wish that I could help you." "As I wish that I could help the young woman who visited earlier..." "And claimed kinship to the king." "Lydia." "Detective." "You forgot your newspaper." "[Siren wailing]" "Jo:" "So, who is he?" "Asif Karimov..." "Military service in Urkesh." "He was exposed to Soviet spycraft, no doubt." "[Cellphone ringing]" "Hello?" "This is Detective Martinez." "I need you to make sure all of your windows and doors are locked." "Why?" "What's happening?" "Well, hopefully, nothing, but until we find your father's murderer." "you think they're coming after me now?" "You just hang tight until we get there, okay?" "[Sighs shakily]" "[Window creaks]" "[Wind whistling]" "I just heard something." "Lydia, is somebody there?" "[Door creaks]" "No!" "Lydia, can you hear me?" "Are you still there?" "[Engine revs, tires squeal]" "Please don't hurt me." "Did royal guard listen to my parents when they begged for their lives?" "I haven't done anything." "You're wrong, princess." "In Urkesh, blood must be repaid with blood." "No!" "[Whimpering]" "[Baby crying]" "[Panting]" "A child?" "No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "No!" "[Tires screech, siren chirps]" "[Baby fussing]" "[Gun cocks]" "[Door bursts open]" "NYPD!" "Lydia." "She's alive." "[Baby crying]" "Get the baby." "[Whispering]" "Okay." "Okay." "Look out!" "[Panting]" "[Asif groaning]" "Clear!" "[Lydia panting]" "[Weakly] I'm bleeding." "[Groans]" "H-help me." "[Siren wailing]" "He must have nicked the iliac artery." "[Crying] My baby." "My baby." "Your child is safe with the police." "I don't want him to grow up like me... an orphan." "Oh, my God." "I'm gonna die." "[Train whistle blows] Please don't let me die." "[Bell clanging]" "[Groans]" "Courage." "You're the son of a king." "Courage." "You're the daughter of a king." "[Chuckles weakly]" "[Siren continues]" "[Monitor beeping steadily]" "Henry?" "[Baby cooing]" "Ah." "Who do we have here?" "I told child services I'd look after him until his mom wakes up." "Shh." "[Baby cooing] What?" "Nothing." "I'm just used to you kicking down doors and shooting perpetrators." "Do you want to hold him?" "Mm-hmm." "Ohh." "Your baby is gorgeous." "Oh, actually, he's not ours." "We're partners... professionally." "Um..." "[Baby cooing]" "I think he likes you." "Mm." "Did you and Abigail ever..." "Think about having children?" "[Sighs]" "Fate had other plans." "The answer is "yes."" "You're certain you want another child?" "I'm certain I want to try." "After all, it is our honeymoon." "What changed your mind?" "[Sighs]" "Instead of just thinking about me and some... future heartbreak," "I realized that you're here... now." "Yes." "I'm here now." "[Sighs]" "Have I got a doozy for you." "If it's all the same to you, can we do this tomorrow?" "I've been babysitting for the last four hours." "Henry, sit." "[Sighs]" "So, what..." "You've discovered some intriguing, long-lost ancestor?" "Yes." "Guess who." "[Sighs] Please." "I'm not in the mood for any guessing games." "You." "What do you mean?" "You, Henry!" "I'm related to you!" "But how is that possible?" "We have a common ancestor, which means we have the same blood in our veins." "or at least a drop or two." "Are you certain?" "According to my research, 200 years ago, a child was born out of Wedlock to a gentleman by the name of Dennis Longworth." "There!" "My Uncle Dennis?" "W... y-you knew him?" "I would hardly call him a gentleman." "The man was a cad and a scoundrel and died in a duel, shot in the groin... not coincidentally." "But who cares?" "We're related." "[Laughs]" "Isn't that the greatest news you ever heard in your whole life?" "!" "It's truly wonderful." "[Laughs]" "Take a look." "We have the same cheekbones." "How did I never see it before?" "Yes." "Look at 'em." "Mm." "Yes!" "[Both laugh]" "Henry:" "The truth is, each of us is related." "It's just a question of how far back you trace your family tree." "Deep down, all of us have shared blood in our veins." "Yak stew." "Mnh-mnh." " Mike:" "What?" " No." "There's a reason they call it "yak."" "What are you talking about?" "It's good." "Although, individual tastes may vary." "I hope you don't mind that I'm holding him." "I-it's just, uh..." "He looks so much like his grandfather." "Someday, this will be yours." "And if we're all related, then all of us have royal blood, which is why every child should be treated as a king or queen..." "No matter how old our children may be."