"Nothing is necessarily what it appears to be." "Stockholm, 22nd December, 1945." "Dear Martin, I've long had this letter in my thoughts." "After some reflection I have decided to resign as literary critic with you." "It's not about the publishing house." "You and Bonniers have alwa ys treated me warmly and respectfully." "I'm grateful you allowed me to publish my own small works   even if they weren't financially rewarding." "No, in that now the war is over and I have no family ties in Sweden " " I see the possibility of setting off for Europe and trying new things." "Make a difference!" "Create!" "I hope that you, who know me so well, understand." "So, my brother, thank you for everything." "Perhaps we'll meet again." "Merry Christmas." "Your friend, Gunnar Wern." "P.S. Concerning my last duty as reviewer " " I can't recommend that you publish Mrs Lindgren's "Pippi Longstocking"." "The story strikes me as too bizarre and amoral." "Possibly, one could create a children's novel   with the somewhat intelligible characters, Tommy and Annika." "But to confide that task to a barely literate housewife is unadvisable." "No, a craftsman's talent as a writer is required here." "No...!" "ILLUMINATION a film about trains" " I'm scared." " I love you." "Will you also kill me the day you tire of me?" "I won't get tired of you." "To kill one's wife for the love of another..." "Can God forgive that?" " God has forgiven Hitler." " How do you know?" "I feel it." "I wish I had your faith." " You'll become Catholic when we marry." " I thought they couldn't remarry?" "Not if they divorce, but if they become widowers." "Marie, listen to me." "She is ill!" "We're sparing her years of suffering." "That's what." "She won't get better." "Only sicker, more bitter and meaner." "I'm a doctor, I know." " Why can't you just get a divorce?" " You want us to get married." "She'll take half of what I've worked years to get together." "We'd live shabbily with our shameful love." "We'd never be respectable." "She'd shadow us like an avaricious phantom screaming for more money." "Infecting our love, spreading poisonous rumours among our friends   until we only had each other to vent our sorrow and fury upon." "Is that how you want it?" "No..." "This is how you want it." "This is what we want." "And we've earned it, haven't we?" "Yes, Henry, we have." "What are we doing?" "We're shortening one person's life   so that two others can be happier." "Isn't that right?" "Not after man's laws ruled by money, but in God's kingdom where love reigns." "What should I do?" "This is Chlonedin." "It's for migraines which my wife gets." "She takes them." "In small, normal doses it's fine." "But just one of those tablets   contains as much as in a whole tin." "Such a dose leads to feelings of euphoria followed by extreme fatigue." "Especially combined with alcohol." "If a tired person having taken too much   falls from a train... well that's nothing more than a tragic accident." " But you prescribed her medicine." " I'm in Stockholm when she takes it." "It's not blood thirst, Marie." "It's gone too far." "I can't even touch her." "I'm disgusted by her." "I don't know whether I can do this." " Do you love me?" " Yes." "Love conquers all." "Believe me." "God will give you strength." "A little push and we're free." "She won't feel a thing." " She dies happy, we meet in Berlin." " In Berlin..." "And we'll have a child." "Not here." "Imagine experiencing all this." "Being looked after." "It's like being a film star." "Little me." "But what a waste, it's scandalous!" "It's typical of me." "I just help myself." "I have a weakness for luxury, that's it." "I want to secretly taste the cream." "Mum used to get so angry with me..." "It's been awhile." "I'll have a big bag." "And some chocolate as well." " Look, Mum, real oranges!" " Imagine that!" " Could I?" " Of course." "What a nice gentleman!" " Thank him properly." " Thank you." "Have a Merry Christmas." " Who are these poor people?" " Refugees from the Baltic states." " Eat something for everyone's sake." " God has been at my side for the war." " He will be with me for this journey." " You are fantastic." " What am I doing?" "Excuse me!" " No, no, it's just fine." " This shoulder usually pops out." " I'm so sorry!" "No, it's a scream." "Let's see..." "Can I do anything?" "That could have been a problem." "The sun is shining..." "What the hell are you doing?" "I beg your forgiveness." "I was wrapped in thought." "I'm sorry." " You didn't hurt yourself?" " No, not at all." "You are too sweet." "Didn't you think I'd manage to find the right train?" "I managed to get awa y for a minute." "How could you go out in such thin shoes?" "I had to rush off so suddenly." " You going back to the practice?" " I have to." " The da y before Christmas Eve?" " And how's our little head?" "Not so good, actually." "But it will probably be better if I eat dinner." " Have you eaten?" " I'll eat later." "I brought your pills." "You and your pills!" "I'm really worried about you." "You must eat, my dear, or the practice will eat you up one da y." " I don't like the staff working late." " You always think of others." "Yes... that is probably my way." "Get going and eat a little dinner anywa y." "We'll meet in two da ys in Milan." "We could have gone together." "That's the result of not wanting to fly." " Two da ys is nothing." " Not for you, perhaps." "Don't try." "You won't miss me that much." " Karin, how little you know me." " Serves you right in that case!" " I love you." " I love you." " What is it?" " I can't do it..." "Everything!" "Just grab the handle, open the door and push her out." "Like this." " Is that so hard?" " Who's slammiing the door?" "Are you slamming the door?" "This isn't an amusement park!" "Hello!" "You can slam doors at home!" "Travel by car!" "People...!" "I can't come with, don't you understand?" "I can't be seen." "What if I bump into her?" "I don't even have a ticket!" "Can't you buy a ticket?" "And be noticed by the conductor?" "And my passport?" "!" " Damn!" " Don't swear!" " Hello!" "You're missing the train!" " Thanks so much!" "I'm coming!" "Don't bother yourself..." " I'm sorry..." " Excuse me, go inside, I'm fine." " I just..." " Doors must be kept closed!" " It's me that can't keep time." " I'm awfully sorry." " It's no problem." "A crutch, ma ybe." " Of course." " I would ask you to calm down!" " It was a mishap." "I wanted to do good." "That's the spirit!" "We should be happy." "It's me that's the sourpuss." "It's like my old mother said..." "She was so festive." "She alwa ys said:" " "With a son like you, there's no fun"." " You poor man." " After all you've been through." " The war was nothing." "Northern Finland was beautiful in winter." "Look, numbered seats!" "Sorry!" " Good day." " Good day." "Take the cane." "Get out the food." "In the crocodile-skin case." "And the newspaper..." "In the blue case." "No, no..." "In the blue one." "Are you colour-blind?" "Be careful with my things!" "I bought that in London." "Take care of this." "Travelling with you is what I'd call a real pleasure." " Ma y I tempt you?" " No thanks." "All the better for me." "And the scarf." "The scarf!" "What an age it takes!" "Have you seen how he fusses about?" "Is this what you would call a holiday?" "I must really apologise for my friend." " Sixten Kvarnström." " Gunnar Wern." " The critic?" " And author..." "Yes." " This is Pomp." " Theodor Bäckström." " Poofter Pomp." " And what are you?" "I sought out men because I hated women." "It's different." " You're embarrassing our companion." " Embarrassing a critic?" "That'd be like asking a cadaver to dance the cancan." "He's not alwa ys like this." "Are you off to the continent to celebrate Christmas?" "Not exactly to celebrate Christmas." "I was thinking of Berlin." "We're also going there." "I don't mind if it's destroyed." " At least you can be yourself." " Of course." "Just look at Hitler." " I hear many authors are off to Europe?" " That's correct." "Personally, I'm not travelling to write." "No... but you must surely be looking for something?" "Well, this may sound strange and a little naive, but..." " I'd like to make a difference." " Yes." "Excuse me a second..." "Excuse me a second!" " Make a difference?" " Make a difference!" "Do something good." "Imagine helping to construct a Europe that is now so destroyed." " I heard Berlin has been flattened." " That's exactly what draws me." "No, no, you must think I sound crazy..." "It's fascinating to be present and assist in the birth of a new, united Europe." " That's exactly how I feel!" " You?" "That would be fitting." "A poofter as midwife?" "Like asking an Eskimo to run a banana plantation." " No one here is laughing." " No, my upbringing prohibits it!" "It's all about the will." "Who knows, ma ybe I'll learn how to be a mason." " I'm looking to believe in something." " I see." "Like Wittgenstein?" "Yes, I find Wittgenstein interesting, even if there's much I don't understand." " Wittgenstein is an idiot." " All people are idiots to you." "Yes, that's true." " I think you will really like Berlin." " Have you been there often?" " No, never unfortunately." " We bathe in a sea of experience." "Why are you so unpleasant?" "I'm unpleasant?" "Because I doubt the authority that praises a city never seen?" "Or that I question a critic who wants to believe   and embraces a philosopher who believes in nothing?" "Did you know that Wittgenstein, in a debate with Turing was asked   just so the discussion could move on, to admit   that just at that moment there were no hippopotami present?" "But Wittgenstein refused." "And so I ask myself, what can such a philosopher ever get one to believe in?" "He doesn't mean for us to reject knowledge, but to constantly question it." "I see." "As an apprentice mason, you'll have much to stand in, that's for sure." ""Nothing is necessarily what it appears to be."" "That's not a bad starting point, I think." " Precisely." " You agree with that hag philosophy?" " Why do you hate women?" " I've never seen good come from one." "But, there's a mirror in the toilet..." "That was funny!" "That was, by God, the funniest thing I've heard!" "I'll live long on that." "Cunt humour!" "I'm going to the restaurant car to have a real dinner." "I didn't mean to be funny." "It's alwa ys wrong." "I didn't mean to upset you." "I never get upset." "It would disturb my alcoholism dosage." "If you could only once sit down and listen to others!" "It would do you good to have a little break from your bitter monologue." "But you are really the most egocentric person I ever met!" "Am I, who alwa ys perceived my surroundings as a personal affront   am I egocentric?" " I'm sorry." " There's nothing to be sorry for." " I don't understand humour." " Don't worry about him." "He'll soon be happier, as long as he's had enough." "It's really nothing to do with me, but..." "How do you stand it?" "Well, I'm old now..." "Yes, he is too." "It hasn't always been like this." "But you grow together." "And a shared hell is at any rate better than one alone." " Are you married?" " No, it never happened." "Never happened...?" "My God, you're a young man." " I'm 38." " 38 years old..." "When I was 38 " " I was thrown out of clubs and restaurants every night." "All week!" "Yes..." "I would even be so bold as to suggest I was something of   a legend in Stockholm society at that time." "Oh, yes..." "Everyone wanted to sit at Pomp's table." "Writers and artists   actors..." "I only thought of having fun." " And you did?" " Yes, I did!" "Yes, I assure you, I had fun!" "Gracious, what fun I've had..." "It's very nice to talk to you as well, young man." "Thank you." "Thank you." "You have no idea how it gladdens me to spread good thoughts." " But imagine if it is as you said?" " What do you mean?" "That one can't know how something is..." "Maybe I didn't even have fun?" "I perhaps only think I had fun?" " No, not at all." " Perhaps it is just like a dream..." "A horrid dream..." "My whole life..." "has just been absolutely awful!" "You're just fantasizing." "Of course you've had fun!" "But, nothing is what it appears to be." "Perhaps I'm not even a real..." "homo." "Of course, you're a fantastic homo!" "It's just your imagination." "Exactly, it's imagination, all just imagination!" "I'm just like a scarecrow." "A homosexual forgery...!" " Stop!" "I'm extremely sorry." " Who cares about a poofter in tears?" "Me!" "You have no idea..." " Ow, my head!" " Do you have a headache, as well?" "Please..." "Allow me to help in some way." "Do you want a glass of water?" "Something from the restaurant?" "Coffee?" " Do you like tea?" " All these questions!" "Be strong..." "Excuse me." "I apologise for my broken body." "So that's how they look." "That's unusual." "Well... water in a carafe..." " I'll just..." " I'll be right back." "How are you?" "So, it's you?" "How nice." " We seem to bump into one another." " This is crazy, it's not happening!" "Don't think about it." "I'm on home leave." "I'll be having Christmas with dad." "I'll help him la y the roof on the barn." "He gets vertigo in his wheelchair." "But one shouldn't be downcast." "There's a little damage here." " Oh, God..." " Tickets!" " I remember..." "I can lie down, too." " I have to go the restaurant car." "I'll pa y someone to help with the roof." " Be careful of my train!" " I'll pa y for that too." "Pay, pay!" "He's so impulsive..." "Sorry, but were you going to see your father?" "Yes." "It will the first Christmas in Uppsala for years." "Dad's excited." " Uppsala?" "This train goes to Berlin." " Berlin?" "There's no end to the surprises on this trip." "Don't be angry anymore." "Please." "I can't stand it when you're annoyed with me." "I'll try, I promise." " You promised at the station." " I know, I'm sorry!" " How can I marry someone I can't trust?" " I want you to trust me." "Confidence, Marie." "If a married couple don't know where the other stands..." "Test me, Henry, give me another chance." " You don't have to marry me." " Why do you sa y that?" "Because all that is important to me, is your happiness." "I've asked too much of you when I ask you to help me to mine." " Perhaps I've been egoistic." " Darling, darling Henry..." "I beg you, forgive me and let me show you I'm ready to do anything for you." "Forgive me." "This isn't easy for me, either." "I understand." "But you are strong." " Our child will also be strong." " Tiickets!" "Just a moment." "It's enough to press the handle and the door slides opens." "Sorry, I'll think of that next time." " Some behave as if they own the train." " Really?" " But Miss is a responsible traveller." " Really?" "One sees that immediately." "Miss is aware there's no stop before Berlin?" " Really?" " Troops and refugees have to return." " Really?" " Yes." "Good to have people in the right country, but it upsets the timetable." "Yes." "We must all sacrifice, do our duty and struggle as we can." "Thank you for the chat, I wish you a pleasant Christmas." "I have to work." " Really?" " I always work." "You handled that well." "Drink this, it'll calm you down." "Come, I'll show you what to do." " Where is it now?" " There, perhaps..." "There, then..." " How did you do that?" " Trade secret..." "Cheers." "If you'd drunk that, you would have enjoyed your last cognac." "You have to distract her when you drop it." "It ma y foam a little." "And you must make sure she takes some form of alcohol." "Am I good?" "My wife will be very happy." "Am I good?" "So, the ice is broken..." " Goodness, it's awful." " That she's so good?" " No, I mean on the train." " You've never done it on a train?" "Trains are good." "You kind of get the rhythm for free." "That was fast, I must say." "The youth of toda y are in such a hurry." " Are you married?" " Yes." "And you?" " Märit." " Karin Schmalensee." " Oh, you're a Jewess?" " Do you have anything against that?" "Not at all, I was just surprised." "You don't look like one." " What does a Jewess look like?" " I don't know any Jews." "Do you?" "Yes." "My husband is from a Jewish family." "But we don't see them." "He converted to Catholicism." " Interesting." "So you're also Catholic?" " I was in love and he wanted it." "I go to Mass, but it doesn't mean as much to me as to Henry, my husband." " Are you a believer?" " Difficult question." "I'm like most people." "When things go well, God and I sa y a polite hello   around Christmas." "Then, when things are tough, I seek Him constantly!" " You're funny." " Yes, I am." " It's unusual." " Because I'm a woman or I'm old?" " You're not old." " How old are you?" " I'm 36 and a half." " Don't sa y "and a half"!" "Small children and men buying sports cars sa y that." " 36..." "You're barely confirmed." " It feels a bit like that." " Are you happy?" " You ask such questions!" " I can return to my eyebrows..." " No, I haven't spoken like this in ages." "Yes, I think I'm happy." " Do you have children?" " No, my husband can't have them." "That's sad to hear." " You sure it's him that can't have any?" " Yes, I think so." "I was pregnant once." "When I was young." "You are young, when will you understand that?" "Probably not until you're old." "That's what usually happens." "Are you sure you want him?" "A new husband might give you a child." "I love Henry." " Don't you feel well?" " I have a slight migraine." "You're carrying an entire pharmacy!" "Could I see?" "Chlonedin..." "They just make you tired." "They actually help." "I usually don't take medicine." "But Henry alwa ys prescribes new pills for me." " He treats me as if I was dying." " I have something much better." "Homemade cider vinegar with henbane." "I make it myself." " Merry Christmas!" " Where do people get it from?" "A glass of water..." " It's cider vinegar." " I saw that at once." "She looked so pretty." "Nothing is necessarily what it appears to be." "For migraines..." "Ah, I see... mushroom soup." "You are a good person, but it's throwing pearls after swine..." " Warm food is on the way." " Why?" "One old poofter more or less..." "There can never be too many old poofters, right?" "Sorry." "I'm so sorry it turned out this wa y." "Let me make up for it, and we'll discuss Wittgenstein." "You'll understand." "I didn't even understand the preface." "What does he mean   that you can't know if you've been on the moon or not?" "I probably destroyed my brain with drink   during that awful time in Stockholm!" "The moon isn't so important, it's how and what we remember." "I remember everything!" "Like yesterday." "You opened the window and aired the fog-like tissue of lies   that had camouflaged my real story." "Thanks." "Dear you, for the truth." "I remember everything in my life." "Such an awful life." "Poor Pomp!" " There's fish and mashed potatoes." " My whole world is mashed..." " And petit pois..." "Pearls for a..." "disgusting homo boar!" "Pearls..." " It was just a train." " Sorry, I had such an awful dream..." "Dinner is in ten minutes." "God, I won't be able to eat a thing." "She will." "She alwa ys eats dinner." "Why do you never call her by name?" ""She" or "my wife", never Karin." " It's for you." "I don't want to hurt you." " But you do hurt me." " We owe a murder victim her name." " Not murder, Marie." "Life shortening, relief from suffering." "I still think she is worth her real name in her last few hours." "Allright..." "Karin." "At midnight, Karin's suffering will be over." " Will you confess afterwards?" " I confess every Sunda y." " You will tell the priest." " Of course." " Will you talk of me as well?" " I have to." "And if the priest gossips?" "Marie, a priest can't gossip about a confession." " He's made a holy oath before God." " Just like when you got married." " What are you getting at?" " As soon as I ask, you get angry!" "I don't understand some things." "I have to ask, for God's sake!" "Ask..." "A true Catholic, as far as I understand, can't even get married?" "That's true." "The pure doctrine   advocates that one live as a celibate to get as close to God as possible." "How has God imagined that the human family would survive?" "That's a tough question." "Some holy oaths are holier than others and even if you break the holiest   you can always confess afterwards and then it's fine." " Yes, that's how it is." " It sounds very practical." "You shouldn't make fun of it as you'll miss the actual essence." "Namely, that God is perfect." "Man is not." "That's why He has ordained rules that make it easier for us to live." "I think I understand perfectly." "No, you don't." "Because you joke that you, with your paltry human understanding   claim to understand God's meaning." "I'm just trying to ally my conscience with my actions." " Do you trust me?" " I trust you." "Do you trust me?" "As I trust myself." "What if she doesn't take the tablet?" "She ma y not want to share a table." "Women are drawn to one another when surrounded by gentlemen." " You know everything about women?" " I know that if you, if it goes wrong were to feign illness, she would help you back to your compartment." " And I'll be waiting here." " It's vile, scandalous!" "Just like you, just now!" "I brought Christmas ham as well, so you can choose." "He's wonderful, this Wittgenstein." "Where does he get it all from?" "You're happy again!" "Have you had anything?" "Yes..." "You go your wa y, and I'll go my way, and we'll never meet..." " No!" "We'll meet..." " Maybe you shouldn't take so many." "I'm worried now..." "Why did I give you these?" "We should find a doctor." " Come to Pomp and we'll pla y doctor!" " This is no game!" "Why not?" "Sixten always pla ys doctor, when he's in the mood..." "What fun it is to be happy!" "Does anyone know if there's a doctor on the train?" "Do you know if there's a doctor on board?" "No..." "Waiter!" "Good!" " What is that for?" " In case." "Just in case." "Wait, I'll tell you." "So that damn good for nothing falls iin love..." " You left him straight awa y?" " Yes." "You see, a man with no imagination, you don't have fun with him." "Henry would never deceive me." "You understand that I wish you well, but never sa y never." "Never even about yourself." "It's curious, you see, but of all the people one knows " " I think one knows oneself least of all." " What should you do about that?" " Well..." "You should try to spend some time with yourself." "Not the person you desperately want to be, but the one that you are." "Women are more exciting than men." "That's just how it is." "It's nothing to grin over, it's obvious!" "I'm hungry and my headache has gone." " Shall we get a bite to eat?" " No thanks, I'm going to read." " What are you reading?" " The Butcher in the Cloister." "I love these, I alwa ys read them." "Unfortunately I've become too good at guessing who the murderer is." "I assure you it is the abbess." "They're starting again." "Calm down!" "Get yourself together, Marie." " We never talked of injecting her." " In case." "That's all I said." " What's that?" " It's just a calmative." " Do you know of a doctor on the train?" " What has happened?" " Do you know of a doctor onboard?" " No idea." "Is it serious?" "Perhaps." "I have a travelling companion who isn't well." "He took some medicine that wasn't his..." " I don't know." "Ask the conductor." " Yes, the conductor..." "Most people will be in the restaurant car." "Why don't you enquire there?" " Don't you feel well?" " It's no problem." "Just a headache." " Perhaps it's the snowstorm." " Yes, I understand." "Terrible weather." "Maybe you should come with me and have a bite to eat?" "Thank you, I think I'll do that." "Go ahead, I'll be along shortly." "I'll just check on my travelling companion." "He's a tad homosexual." " She was in the next compartment?" " It would seem so." " The whole time?" " It would seem so." " Will you be able to do this?" " Take a tablet if you're so worried." " Darling..." " Don't touch me!" "Trust me." "Wait, I can help..." "Goddamn, bugger, shit, hell...!" "Sorry!" "Are you oka y?" "These were real Laplandish boots!" "Can I pa y you something?" "I'm just trying to be nice, carrying soup to the poor refugees..." "Hang on..." " Can I help in some way?" " I can dry myself!" "This is the last time I volunteer and make a spectacle of myself!" " Are you sure you'll be fine?" " Go to hell!" " Bloody hell, goddamn shit!" " How are you?" "Some bloody idiot has left glass on the floor!" " Let me take this..." " Thanks." " Let's go to the toilet and have a look." " Thanks." " You're so kind." " I'm actually a doctor." "Sometimes one is lucky in life..." "OCCUPIED" " Would you like anything else?" " No, thanks." "Have to stop somewhere." "Soup and a chair and I don't know what else." "Nice restaurant car..." "I think." " Let me know if you need anything." " It's already too much." "Thank you." " Pardon, where is the lady's room?" " Continue straight ahead." " Thank you." " Sorry, is there is a doctor on board?" " Have you seen the conductor?" " Well, the conductor..." " We don't really get on..." " I see, so that's the story." " We have a little cold, do we?" " No, I'm absolutely fine." " It's my travelling companion." " I get it." "I was barman at Berns." " On the gallery." "The toffee balcony." " I see." "Right..." "I think the gentleman has a friend over at that table..." " Theodor's unwell." "He's taken something." " Who hasn't?" " Have you no heart?" " Sure, it's just a little marinated." " You must help him!" " I recognize that voice." " I'm not finished here." " Is it sergeant Axelsson?" "Why are you so unpleasant?" "What joy is there in hurting others?" "Axelsson is a tenor." "This is more of a soft baritone." "Is it me, of the two of us   who has a passion for hurting others?" "I might hurt myself, that's true." "But you can't deny that I support the restaurant business." "There was a bite to this soup." "I must have the recipe." "Waiter?" " You will drink yourself to death." " Life is no more fun by extending it." "Waiter..." "This tomato soup is fantastic." "How did you do it?" " My God, look at you!" "Is it you?" " I can't see." "Is it you?" "I'm so terribly sorry!" "I must make it up to you somehow." "No, no... absolutely not!" "Everything is fine." "Don't find me picky, but our meetings so far have been of a violent nature." "I feel so good just now..." "I just want to sit here and enjoy." " All alone!" " I have to go." " I'll come back." "We must talk." " Better with higher infant mortality." "That it should be so hard to be pleasant!" " Have you found a doctor?" " No." " Have you seen the lady you came with?" " No, sorry..." "Fantastic!" "What a bite to this soup!" " Spanish peppers..." " And no hot dogs to hand." "It's doesn't burn, but not far from it." "Wonderful!" "What happened?" "Sorry." "Did I spill something?" "I'm probably in the way." "VACANT" " Excuse me, my mistake." " No bother." " Evening." "Are you alone?" " I'm expecting someone." "A table for two..." " Would you like anything to drink?" " A cognac, please." " Has anything happened." " No, not at all." " Ma y I join you?" " Of course." " I've ordered a cognac." " I'll join you." "Two cognacs, please." "A case of cognac for me too." "Ah, so you are staring?" "You women are used to free entertainment." " I think that's enough cognac." " A pail of absinthe with a straw, then." " We won't mind him." " No..." "You never have done!" " The snow is beautiful." " Like a whore's arse at Christmas." " What are you sa ying?" " I had to." "Can't stand to be close." " There are women present." " Women are constantly absent." "Have you no respect for women?" "Being a woman is a wa y of avoiding public responsibility." " Two cognacs." " Thank you." "I suggest the gentleman retire." "You don't know what you ask of me, my boy." "Could I pa y?" " The gentleman has already paid." " That's something." "Just a minute." " Have to watch the household budget." " Yes, let's go..." "Good girl." "Listen here..." "I never believed in you!" "May I sit down?" "Could I trouble you for a drop of port?" "It must be terribly warm sitting in that costume and mask?" "But what don't we do for children?" "My first husband, Kjell-Hugo   he sweated so awfully, we couldn't even touch one another!" "In bed I had to sleep in rain clothes." "Poor man..." " Cheers." " Cheers." " Sorry, what behaviour." "Forgive me." " Are you not well?" "I'm..." "I'll just go..." "I'll just go to the lady's room." "Excuse me, could I have the bill?" "I am just going to look after my companion." "Good, get her to our carriage." "What are you mumbling about?" "I'll have another, it's Christmas!" "My second husband, Bertil..." "Good God, what has happened here?" "These people have lived in a camp for several years." "They've eaten nothing but bread and porridge." "Then some idiot in Stockholm gave them chocolate and oranges." "I'm at the end of my tether." "It's been two da ys since we slept." "We struggle and do our best, and he buys chocolate and oranges." " He probably meant well." " Of course." " Have you seen a doctor?" " Are you also ill?" "No, it's not me." "It's a friend." " He just keeps laughing." " I see." "If you should find a doctor, could you be so kind as to send him over?" " After you friend has stopped laughing." " This takes precedence, of course." "He's not laughing that much." "If one could only do something." "Let me take care of that..." "I'm sorry..." "I'm sorry..." "My fifth husband, Karl-Erik..." "He was the most problematic." "He was so scared of floors." "Imagine that?" "So I had to carry him all the time and he was so fat." " What the hell?" " Yes, you could sa y that!" " I see you're on the edge of your seat." " Thank you very much." "In the beginning we lived in Stocksund, but there was so much floor there..." " And your companion?" " I don't know where she went." "So we bought a boathouse in Falsterbo and I was seven months pregnant." "Then he developed a water phobia." "The door of our compartment opens on its own." "Could you...?" "We'll look at it at once." "We don't want further accidents on this trip." "It was sad, as he was a priest and the nuns didn't understand him." "Go and pee." "I think I'll have another drink." "Bartender?" "Have you got any port?" "I know Beatrice, but you must forgive him." "I've tried to maintain my faith throughout this entire war!" "I have struggled, struggled to give a slither of light to people   who have gone through the most unimaginable darkness." "I've bandaged war invalids with barely a body to bandage!" "My tears flowed, I almost choked with sorrow and disgust over man's outrage." "But I did it." "I did it!" "I believed!" " I tried to forgive the inexplicable!" " You must rest..." "How can I rest when he's at large?" "Who knows what he'll get up to next?" "You heard what the conductor said?" "He's a writer you sa y?" " That's what he calls himself." " How can you give starving people chocolate and oranges?" "!" "What a cock-up!" "What an out and out bloody idiot!" "There is no God!" "Believe me." "No God could have created such an idiotic bumbler." " He was trying to do good, you said?" " That's what he said." "I have lost my faith!" "After all these years!" " Goddamn bloody shit and piss!" " Beatrice..." "Don't sit and sa y Beatrice the whole time like some bloody parrot!" "Don't you think I know my name?" "Just because God seems to have forgotten!" " I understand how you feel." " What is it you understand so well?" "How do you think it feels to have a million tons of chicken on your head?" "If you get hold of him, you'll kill him won't you?" "Don't let the damned nuisance live." "Promise me." "The Railway doesn't have that authority." "There seem to be signs of life here!" "It smells like my old barracks." " That's also his work." " Of course it is." " How do you feel?" " I feel so good, I have tablets that put music over everything." "Oops, sorry, Miss." "Hello!" "You can't go there, it's for the army!" "Let him wander about." "What could possibly be worse?" "The whole train's going straight to hell, anyway." "I also think it's important that we think positively." " You ladies can feel safe, it works." " Thanks so much." "No bother." "Thank you." "How could you let that sweetie go so quickly." "Have you no judgement?" "I must go to see what happened to her." "If I were you, but a man, I'd never chase after   a little goose that can't even drink a cognac without spilling it." " I'll be back soon." " My first man said that too." " On his return I didn't recognise him." " I don't feel at all sorry for you." "People are crazy." "Lucky I'm an old maid." "Father Christmas!" "Please, could she say hello?" " What a hurry he was in." " He has to take care of lots of girls." " Marie, are you there?" " Henry?" " What's happening?" " Nothing, the lock has jammed." " Did you speak to her?" " Let me out!" " Did you speak to her?" "!" " Let me out!" " Is it you?" " Yes..." " There was a strange sound." " It was the wind on opening the door." " Did you find a doctor?" " No." "I've searched the whole train." "The wagon in front of this is the last before the locomotive and it's empty." "Oh, conductor?" "I'm looking for my companion..." "Excuse me!" "Now you have gone too far!" "Maiming war heroes and poisoning refugees is one thing." "We have off da ys." "But playing with the emergency brake!" "Don't you see the penalty?" "!" "I don't care that it's Christmas, this is being reported!" "Unless you have a very good explanation." " I saw Father Christmas." " Father Christmas?" "Where?" " Please, Miss..." " Here, outside the door!" "Right!" "If you all have your wish lists ready, let's go and speak to him." "Who knows, maybe the reindeer were tired and wanted to go by train!" "I saw him clearly!" "My grandmother claims gnomes pinch her sherry in the pantry at night." " Was he alone?" " Or did he have the wife with him?" " Ma ybe some elves needed to pee?" " He stood there!" "We've lost at least six minutes." "Like I said, this will be reported!" "I tell you I saw a person through the window." "Someone in danger!" "What should I have done!" "Come, lady, we're losing time." "Right, report and driver's licence." "The police will contact you." " I tried to save a person's life." " It's no fun..." "But those are the rules which I'd rather follow than having fun." "Had this been Texas, you would have been shot by now." "It would be appropriate to be grateful." "Henry!" "Oh, Henry, what should I do?" " Was it you...?" " I don't know..." " I don't know how to thank you..." " God, you need a doctor." "I am a doctor." "Even we have to get dressed up once a year." " I've searched the train for a doctor." " What for?" "A man in my compartment swallowed lots of tablets." "He's behaving oddly." " What kind?" " I think they're Chlonedin." "That's okay." "Just make sure he doesn't drink alcohol." "It's lethal." " Really?" " Go on, I'll be allright." "I'll come and see him in a while." "I'm in the last carriage." "We're in the carriage behind the restaurant car." "Thanks so much!" "Sorry, darling, sorry!" "Good God!" "Quiet!" " Why couldn't you open it?" " I don't know." "I'm not so strong." "Maybe I did something wrong." "When I tried it, nothing happened." "I did what you said, but I was so nervous when I was going to drink..." " There, there..." " I'm useless, I can't do anything!" "There, there, it's okay now." "You just got a little unlucky." "Now we have all the time in the world." "We know where she's sitting now." "Look at the state of you..." "Everything is my fault and you sa y nothing." "You are the most kind man in the world." " I know how we should kill her." " Hello?" "Is anyone there?" "I've gone around the whole train, but it seems everyone wants to go at once." "And what a long time some people take." "One even took in a soup pot!" "What do you give me for that?" "It was so funny, I was sitting sewing and I got an ice skate in my eye!" "But I feel so good!" "I'll sit in my cabin in the meantime." "Jesus is in you, darling!" "Thank you..." "I don't understand." "I small glass of port, please." " Your nice friend has left." " It's fine." "I found a doctor." "What will a doctor be able to do without an operating theatre?" "No, no." "The doctor said he shouldn't drink alcohol." "What has alcohol got to do with it?" "Don't you know, the poor soldier   you set on fire had his whole face burnt?" " Set on fire?" " You lit his cigarette." "His bandage..." "Oh, my God...!" "It's not true!" "I must report myself to the police." "It's a popular notion on this train." "Apropos, your friend took a bottle of Jameson when he left." " Sixten?" " Call him whatever, as long as he pa ys." "What if he gives it to Pomp?" "What have I done?" "!" "Alcohol and Chlonedin!" "Pomp?" "A Swedish soldier burns..." "And he thinks of his dog." "You clumsy fool!" "Why do you try and help all the time?" "Good God...!" "I hope, hope, hope..." "Doctor!" "Doctor!" "Jesus Christ..." "You alone control life and death." "Give me the strength in my difficult task." "Help me to kill the one that prevents me living the life   that you have chosen for me." "Amen." " It's fine now." "That's good." " It's not at all fine." "She's drunk." "Just cut off his head..." "Let it roll..." "I'm so sorry." "I meant well..." "So you're back again?" "Of course, some of us are still alive." " Beatrice, keep quiet." " I'm going to kill myself." "You do that!" "Let me know if you need help!" "Clumsy bugger!" " Henry never drinks alcohol." " And you love him?" "I think I love his moral sense." "His strong faith." "You know where you have Henry..." "The waiter fixed that." "Well, Gunnar..." "There's nothing left." "Do it." "Do it...!" "That will have to be my nightcap." "I have to think of my beauty sleep." "Sleep well." "Good God!" "Why must I be so bloody clumsy?" "!" "You can at least help me to die?" "!" " Sorry for all the ill I've caused!" " No!" "It's jammed." "It's the crutch that's being wilful..." " Hello?" "Are you locked in?" " It's not you, is it?" " Say it isn't you!" " I'll help you out." "No, no, that won't be necessary!" " I'll be fine." " Don't hold the handle!" "I'm holding the handle!" " Did I break anything?" " Wait, your crutch." "There's a draught here..." "Thank you." "You're too kind." "See you later..." "Are you oka y?" " Are you going to smoke?" " You can bet on it." " Prudish little cunts are the worst." " You are fantastic." "Help!" "I'm stuck!" "Careful..." "Now!" "Karin..." "It's not what you think." "You think too much!" "No!" "No...!" "Look!" "He managed one more anywa y." "Have you read Wittgenstein?" " Don't you feel well?" " It's no problem." "Just a headache." "Wait, he has a syringe." " Cheers." " Cheers." "I'll just go to the lady's room." "I am just going to look after my companion." " Imagine, it was the gardener!" " How irritating." "Life goes on." "Think about what I said." "There are alwa ys new men." "Thanks, but I think I have made up my mind." " Merry Christmas." " Of course, it's Christmas Eve." " There goes a wonderful woman." " Like me?" "Almost." "Welcome, Major." "I hope your journey was entertaining." "What do you think could happen on a train between Stockholm and Berlin?" "Away is nice, but home is best?" "He stopped the train." "Did you hear?" "He stopped it!" "Sorry, I didn't mean to." "I wanted to build something good." " What has he done?" " No idea..." " What we did, we did well." " We did it bloody well." " I love you." " I love you." "Morning, Gunnar!" "It looks good." "And so stable." "That wall will be there for a long time." "It'll be nice for the kids, they can kick a ball against it." "It offers protection against the elements as well." "You can sit and catch a tan and lounge about." "It'll be great." "It's fantastic." "Only three of you toda y?" "Someone off sick, are they?" "It's easy to catch a cold out here in this biting wind." "I talked to Heinz here." "A nice bloke." "Precise and to the point." "He knows what he wants." "You've let your hair out a bit more today?" "Of course, you want to feel a little unbound and free sometimes..." "Translation:" "Alexander Keiller"