"(tense and ominous orchestral music)" "(birds chirping)" "(wind howling)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(clock ticking)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(ominous orchestral music)" "(man screaming)" "(throaty growling)" "(man gasping)" "(throaty growling)" "(punctuated, ghostly wailing)" "(growls continue over tense orchestral music)" "(glass shattering)" "(man shrieking)" "(body slams to the ground)" "(birds chirping)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(phone ringing)" " Hello?" "Yes, who should I say is calling?" "Agnes, phone!" " Take a message, I'm in the tub!" "I couldn't move if my hair were on fire." " It's Devon Lauder." " Oh my God!" " Ooh, nice outfit." "I'll be it's difficult to find accessories, though." " Hardy har har." "Hello, um, Mr. Lauder?" " Good evening, Dr. Goldberg." "I , uh, trust you read about the accident last week." " Uh, yes, I'm, I'm sorry." "I assume the negative publicity will delay the inn's opening?" " [Devon] You assume correctly." " May I also assume that you're calling because you've reconsidered my proposal?" "(teletypes clacking)" " Yes, assemble your team as quickly as possible." "(Whitney panting)" " [Agnes] Hello, Whitney." " Agnes, I gave you my answer last night." " I can't accept it." " Try." " Whitney, you have a gift!" " You mean a curse." " I mean, a gift!" "And if you believe God gave it to you, you must believe he wants you to use it." " Ooh, that's a cheap shot, Agnes, especially coming from you." " Why, because I'm an atheist?" " It scares me, you understand?" "I can't control it." " But I can." " I hope so, for everyone's sake." "(distant siren blaring)" " Morning, Susan." " Good morning, Mr. Jackson." " [Levi] Hey, Tony, what's up?" " Oh, man, we gotta meet Murphy downtown in 40 minutes." " You know, you're supposed to iron your shirts at home before you put them on." " I haven't been home, I've been here all night, workin' on your department store case." " What for, it was obviously an inside job." "Just have all the employees take a lie detector test." " No, I'm not convinced." "The alarm system was tampered with." "Oh, man, we're late, gotta go!" "(distant traffic humming)" "(teletypes clacking)" " [Whitney] Ginger, I have a bad feeling about this one." " Don't worry about it, it'll be fine." "(phones ringing)" " Good morning, everyone, uh, my name is Devon Lauder, thank you for appearing on such short notice." "Dr. Goldberg informs me that she's worked with many of you before, so, Doctor, if you could briefly introduce your staff." " Certainly, this is my husband, Felix, the best mental medium I've ever known." "Next to him is our video technician, Ginger Kowolski, and next to her is our physical medium, Whitney O'Shea." "And, uh, these three gentlemen I'm afraid I don't know." " I assume than that one of you is Mr. Murphy." " Uh, yes, sir, Frank Murphy." "We spoke on the phone." " Certainly." " Uh, these are Tony Vincente and Levi Jackson, my best operatives." " His only operatives." " (gasps) That makes us the best!" " Fine, I realize a lot of you have questions, so allow me to give you a brief history." "Two years ago, my uncle Avery died, and left me his home in Solano County." "It's a gothic mansion built in 1861, which would be worth five to six million dollars, if it were surrounded by prime vineyards." "Unfortunately, the adjoining property is a county-owned cemetery." "This, for me, makes the house uninhabitable, but a stipulation of my uncle's will forbids me from either selling it or tearing it down." "If I attempt to do either, the property will be donated to the county, no doubt to add onto the cemetery." "Because of this, I've tried renting the property out several times, but no one's ever been able to stay longer than three nights." "They've all been driven away, scared off by the ghost of my uncle Avery." " Excuse me." " Yes?" " Are we on Candid Camera?" " Let the man finish, Vincente." "(teletypes clacking)" " I realize it's hard to believe, but I've been there." "I've heard those horrible, ungodly shrieks and moans." "The house has remained unoccupied ever since." "I had pretty much decided to let the county have it when I read of a bed and breakfast inn in New Orleans that claims to be haunted, and because of this, it's doing incredible business." "Suddenly, haunted houses are the in thing." "This seemed like the perfect solution to my problem, so I quickly renovated Lauder House into a bed and breakfast." "Then, in order to publicize its opening," "I hired The Amazing Azimov to spend the night in it." " The Amazing who?" " I understand he was a fairly popular Las Vegas magician." " Yes, correct, and with his death," "Lauder House has finally lived up to its nickname," "Slaughter House." " His death, what are you saying, you saying ghosts killed him?" " He jumped from a second story window, yes." " Because a ghost scared him." " That's what we believe, Mister, um." " Vincente." " Vincente, may I ask you a question?" "Why are you here?" " Why am I here?" " Because I said so." " Because he said so." " Mr. Lauder, am I mistaken, or did you agree that my team and I would photograph and exorcize the Lauder House ghost?" " Yes, but only if Mr. Murphy and his associates go along to protect you." " What?" " What?" " I will not be responsible for another tragedy." "If I could afford to just let Lauder House go and absorb the loss, believe me, I'd do so, but the restoration was just too expensive." "I need to make this bed and breakfast work." " But they'll only get in the way!" "They know absolutely nothing about psychic phenomenon!" " They go with you, or you don't go." "(teletypes clacking)" " Dr. Goldberg, my men and I are professional security operatives, and if there is something, well, dangerous in that house, then your three best chances of survival are sitting right here." "(teletypes clacking)" " [Levi] I love it when Murphy talks like a detective novel." " Yeah, Sam Spade lives." " Never say spade to a brother." " Sorry, all the ghost talk must have me spooked." " Very funny, hey did you see that butt on that video tech?" "I think I'm in love." " You love anything in a skirt." " Hey, man, I got a bad feeling about this case." " [Tony] Don't tell me you're afraid of ghosts!" " I'm afraid of anything that makes a man jump out of a window and kill himself." "(distant traffic humming)" "(patrons chattering)" " I wouldn't drink that if I were you." " What?" " [Frank] Your beer, it's as flat as my ex-wife's chest." "Let me get you another one." "We'll take two more, please." " What're you doin' here, Murphy?" " Lookin' for you." "I got it." "Tony, we have to talk, it's important." " Well, it must be, Murphy." "I mean, buying me beer, calling me Tony." "How'd you find me here anyway?" " Jackson told me." " Thank you, Levi." "What else did he tell you?" " Well, that you're not planning on going to the Lauder House with us." " So, what do you care?" "You like me even less than I like you, and I like you less than I like trench mouth." " Maybe so, but we need each other." " Speak for yourself, pal, I like girls." " You don't like anyone, not even yourself." "Just remember, I take shit from you only as long as you're worth it." "You put up with me because, Q.T. was the only firm that would hire you as a detective after you left the force." " Detective?" "Come on, Murphy, who the hell are you kiddin'?" "You're goin' up there to take on Casper the fuckin' Ghost, you don't need a detective." "You need Bill Murray for Christ's sake!" " So that's what this is all about!" "You don't like the case?" " No, this is not a case." "This is a joke." "Look, you want us to go up there and babysit this grade-A group of chuckleheads while they sit around in a circle, hold hands, and talk to dead people!" " What makes you so sure they're chuckleheads?" "Maybe this house really is haunted." " Yeah, well, yeah, and maybe your parents aren't really first cousins either, Murph, but I wouldn't lay odds on it, 'cause see, if you're not a direct product of inbreeding," "than there really is a God and he's got a personal grudge against you." " One of these days, you're gonna go too far, and then, I'm gonna take you down a peg." " Yeah, fascinating." " Look, this is the bottom line." "Devon Lauder is offering us an incredible amount of money to babysit these chuckleheads, as you put it, so that's what we're gonna do." " What is this we, white man?" "He's offering you an incredible amount of money." "Me, I go home with the same paycheck every week no matter who the client is." "So, if you don't mind, Murph, just count me out on this one, all right?" " [Frank] Well, I don't wanna count you out." " Look, you and Levi can handle this just fine without me." " Fuck Levi, he's gonna spend all weekend tryin' to get in that video technican's pants!" " That's bullshit and you know it." "He may be a walkin' hard-on with feet, but he's a good detective, he does his job well." " Well, nevertheless, I want you there in the morning, and so does Devon Lauder." "He, uh, asked for you specifically." " Ho-ho, so that's it, I don't go, you don't get your incredible amount of money!" " And you won't have a job, 'cause if ya fuck this up, I will fire you!" "Count on it!" " Well, that'll take me down a peg, won't it?" " I'll fire your buddy Levi, too." " You are so full of shit, Murphy, you're not gonna fire a good detective just to get even with me." " Detectives like Jackson are a dime a dozen!" "I only kept him around because, well, he was the only person you seem to get along with." "But if you go, he goes." " You're serious." "Goddammit, I gotta hand it to ya, Murphy, I'm impressed." "I always knew you were a scumbag, but I never knew how scummy a bag you could be." " Well, it's a dog eat dog world, my friend." "You gotta play hardball if you wanna beat the rats at the rat race." "How do you think I got to be the head of Q.T. Security?" " Suckin' the boss's dick?" " Just be there in the morning, bright and early, or you and Jackson can keep each other company on the unemployment line." " Say hi to the other weasels for me, will ya?" "(Tony sighs)" "(liquid sloshing)" "(patrons chattering)" "It's OK, he's had his shots." "(birds chirping)" "(engines rumble to a stop)" " Man, look at this place." "I wonder how much a place like this costs?" " Your very soul!" " Man, I told you to knock that shit off!" "It ain't funny, man!" "(Tony chuckling)" "(door rattling)" "(hinge creaking)" "(clock ticking)" " I don't like this, I can feel the evil in this house." " Yes, so can I ." " Me, too." " Aw, get a grip, Jackson." " He's right, boss, we're not alone." " What are you talkin' about?" "What is it?" " Cremation urn." "(coughs) Somebody's home." " Oh, man, this is bullshit!" " Mr. Vincente, if you're finished showboating, please, put it back." " Somebody we know?" " Avery Lauder, it was another stipulation of his will that he be cremated and placed here in his home." " Mr. Lauder was quite a character, wasn't he?" " Well, it would appear he's not the only one." "If there are no objections," "I suggest we have our first sitting right now." " I'm gonna need some help with the equipment." " Uh, Vincente?" " I'll get it." " Uh, Vincente, you check the upstairs doors and windows and I'll check the downstairs, and make sure everything's secure." " Wait." "There's something behind those curtains." "(swell of ominous orchestral music)" " Yeah, probably a window or something." " I'm serious." "(ominous orchestral music)" "(Vincente screams)" "(Ginger gasps)" " These are filthy, these are absolutely filthy." "(clock ticking)" "(both laughing)" " Let's go get the gear." "(jarring orchestral accent)" " Who the fuck are you?" " I'm Elwin, the groundskeeper." " The groundskeeper?" " Yes, I'm afraid I forgot to mention him." "He was Avery Lauder's stage assistant." " Stage assistant, what, this Lauder was an actor or something?" " Hardly, he was a very famous psychic and illusionist." " Wait a minute, wait a minute, this rings a bell." "Wasn't this guy a serial killer?" " Oh, yeah, the Venue Slasher." " That was an unproven rumor." " No, no, no, no, it was a lot more than a rumor." "He was a prime suspect, as a matter of fact, they were just about to arrest him when he turned up dead." " That's right, and they found him in this house with his heart cut out." " Now why wasn't I informed of any of this?" " You didn't ask." " He never does, except how much." " Now, I resent that, Vincente." " I resent your mother for taking drugs when she was pregnant." "Is there anything else you've forgotten to tell us?" " No, that's it." " Yeah, sure, I'll be back in 15." " Uh, would you mind if I went along?" "I'd like to see the rest of the house." " Sure, come on." "(birds chirping)" " (sighs) Elwin, will you take everyone's bags up to their rooms, please?" " Yes, ma'am." " We might as well get the gear, too." " Might as well." " Mr. Murphy, do you always allow your subordinates to address you with such total disrespect?" " No, but Vincente's never been able to keep any of his opinions to himself." " Then why do you put up with him?" "Is he married to your sister or do you merely have a soft spot for ill-mannered troglodytes?" " You ever heard of the Thomas Knox case?" " The, uh, TV actor and his family who were murdered in L.A." " Right, triple homicide." "It was on the books for 20 years." "Every cop on the force took a shot at it, but no one could solve it, and then some rookie, fresh out of the academy, cracked it in two months." " Mr. Vincente." " [Frank] Yup, I get 90 percent of my business because Tony Vincente's on my payroll." " If he is such a master sleuth, why isn't he still a member of LA's finest?" " 'Cause they didn't like his smart mouth either." " [Agnes] Well, I suppose it's none of my business, but if I were you, I would fire Mr. Vincente in spite of his reputation." " Oh, well, I think you may be right, Doctor." "It's none of your business." " Felix, did you hear that?" "Are you gonna just stand there and let him talk to me like that?" " Well, dear, the man does carry a gun." "(clock ticking)" " So what do you videotape with all this stuff?" " Ghosts, if they show up." " You're shittin' me!" " No, really, even though you can't see them with the naked eye, sometimes the camera will pick them up and put them on tape." " Well, scratch my ass." " Not until I know you better." "(Levi chuckles)" "(ominous orchestral music)" "(mysterious orchestral music)" " This is weird." " Not really." "A lot of these old houses had private chapels in the attic." " With an inverted cross?" " Son of a bitch." " Mr. Vincente, are you a religious man?" " Oh, I'm sorry, I never discuss religion on any day with a y in it." " I didn't mean to pry, it's just that I'm very religious and well" " Miss O'Shea," "why don't you just say what you followed me up here to say." " Avery Lauder was more than just a psychic." "He was an extremely powerful warlock." " You mean a witch?" " Yes." "The police found his body on this very altar." "His chest carved open, burning candles everywhere." "Neither his killer nor his heart were ever found." " You know, San Francisco's close by, maybe he left it there." " Sure, make stupid jokes, but I believe the police interrupted a satanic ritual that would have given Avery Lauder immortality, if he'd had the time to complete it." " I don't mean to be rude, Miss O'Shea, but I think I'm due back on Earth." " You said you wanted the complete history of Lauder House." "I just thought you should get it, because Agnes certainly won't tell you." " Why's that?" " Because Agnes doesn't believe, and if she doesn't believe, then it doesn't exist." "She has no idea of what a ghost really is." " [Tony] And what is that?" " The very soul of someone who has lived and died." "If he was evil, his soul is evil." "If he was powerful, his soul is powerful." "Avery Lauder was both, and as long as we're in his house, we're all in very grave danger." "(birds chirping)" "(device beeping)" " [Agnes] All right, it's working." "(device beeping)" " [Frank] All secure?" " Here, Whitney, place this in your lap." "(device beeping)" "I'm addressing myself to the spirit of Avery Lauder." "If you're here, I wish to speak to you." "(device beeping)" " I'm not getting anything." " Neither am I ." " Nothing here either." " Avery Lauder, I know you're here." "The man sitting next to me is a mental medium." "You may speak through him." "(beeping grows faster)" "(eerie orchestral music)" " Who are you?" " [Agnes] I am here to free you from this house." " I do not wish to be freed." " [Agnes] Then I will force you." " You are not strong enough." " [Agnes] I believe I am." " I will rise like the phoenix and destroy you, all of you!" " And how will you do that?" "All you've ever managed to do for the last two years is make noise." "I'm not some silly magician who can be scared into killing myself." " You would mock Avery Lauder?" " I would give you a chance to prove your words." "The woman sitting across from you is a physical medium." "Through her, you can show us the extent of your power." "(device beeping steadily)" " Perhaps later." " Why not now?" " Later." " Are you afraid?" " Oh, no, but you will be." "(crescendo of fluttering, unsettling strings)" " Felix, Felix, what's (Felix groaning) what's wrong?" "(Felix groaning desperately)" "(Felix shrieking and gasping)" "Help him!" "(all chattering anxiously)" " [Frank] Get ahold of his legs!" "Hold him!" " [Levi] I'll get his legs, man." "(desperate groaning continues)" " [Frank] Hold him down." "(Felix whimpering)" "(Felix gasping)" " Is he all right?" " He's still alive." "(Felix gasping)" " Thank goodness you're safe!" "(Felix gasping)" "How do you feel?" " (groans) Fine, but who's been using my head as a basketball?" " Dr. Goldberg, if you have no objections, maybe we should take this opportunity to unpack." " Yes, all right, but I want everyone back down here in an hour to try again." " Uh, Jackson, why don't you take a quick look at the grounds." " What for, you and Tony already checked all the windows and doors." " Humor me." " Oh, no wonder my mouth tastes like leather." "Sorry about the drool." " It's waterproof." " Oh." " (clears throat), um, Mr. Vincente?" "Your quick thinking saved my husband from injuring himself." " Yes, it did." " And, um, I was pretty useless." " Yes, you were." " (sighs) You're not gonna make this easy on me, are you?" " Mm, no, I'm not." " I, uh, just wanna say thank you." " You're welcome." "(both sigh)" " [Felix] Now, if you two are quite finished," "I'd like to explore the basement." " Why?" " Something down there is very important to our Mr. Lauder." "I , I sensed it while he was speaking through me." "(eerie orchestral music)" " So let's go check out the basement." "(device beeping steadily)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(quietly unsettling orchestral music)" "(music grows slightly more eerie)" "(unsettling string accent)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(door rattling)" "(birds chirping)" " Hey, fool!" "Don't you know you can go blind doin' that?" "(Elwin growls)" "(footsteps clacking)" " Wish I knew what we were lookin' for." " Don't worry, we'll know it when we find it." " Can I ask you a question?" "That box, with the green light on it, what was that?" " An invention of mine." "You see, Whitney is a physical medium." " As opposed to your husband who's a mental medium." " Yes, Felix is like an intercom, allowing ghosts to actually speak through him." "Whitney, on the other hand, is like a doorway." "A spirit may actually pass through her and physically manifest his presence here in our world, usually by moving inanimate objects." " Couldn't that be dangerous?" " Without my invention, yes." "All living things have an aura of electromagnetic energy, and when we die, this energy usually dissipates into the atmosphere, but sometimes, it remains intact and here on Earth, and then, you have a ghost." " So this is some sort of, uh, an electromagnetic vacuum type" " Exactly, and that's why I gave it to Whitney." "If Lauder's ghost had tried to pass through her, the vacuum would have trapped him immediately." " [Tony] Then what?" " Then I would have removed him from this house and dissipated him." " Eh, I don't know about this, Doc." "I haven't had this much trouble swallowing something since my mom fed me okra." "(Agnes laughs)" " I found it!" "(Felix sighs)" "For some reason, this pentagram was very important to Mr. Lauder's ghost." "Even now, I , I can actually sense its evil." "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(shower hissing)" "(Avery growls)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(beeping increases in pitch)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(beeping further increases in pitch)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(paper rustling)" "(Whitney gasping violently)" "(frantic orchestral music)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(shower gurgles)" " I don't fuckin' believe this!" "(Ginger grunts)" "(Ginger sighs)" "Huh?" "(menacing orchestral music)" "(shower crunching into flesh)" "(Ginger gasps)" "(Ginger groans and gasps)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(Whitney panting)" "(Whitney sighs)" " Now, what happened here?" " A breeze, maybe." " A breeze, all the doors and windows should be locked up!" " [Tony] Yeah, they should be." " Are you saying I missed one?" " I'm not sayin' anything." " The hell you're not!" "Lemme tell you somethin', hot shot," "I didn't miss a thing." " Yeah, except maybe the last stage of evolution." " Don't push me, Vincente." " Whitney, are you all right?" " I don't know, I feel really drained for some reason." " [Tony] Maybe you should sit down." "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(door thumps)" " Is everybody all right?" " Yeah, what the hell happened to you?" " I caught that groundskeeper spying on one of the women and the son of a bitch jumped me!" " Elwin?" " Yeah, where's Ginger?" " Takin' a shower." " Go!" "(dramatic orchestral music)" " Oh!" "(unsettling string accent)" " Aw, Jesus." " That motherfucker, I'll kill him!" " Keep them outta here." "It's gonna be OK, man." "We'll get him, I promise." "Come on." " What happened to Ginger?" " She's dead, stabbed through the throat." " Oh my God!" " I, I'm calling the police." " [Tony] Good idea." " Oh, maybe not." "It's dead!" "(switchhook rattling)" " It's dead all right." "(phone rattling)" " That son of a bitch cut the line!" " OK, that's it, party's over." "Murphy, I suggest we pack it up and get the hell outta here now!" " Wait a minute, let's not panic, there's no reason for all of us to leave." " You wanna reason?" "Take a look in there, lady!" " I believe that Mr. Murphy is in charge of security, not you." "Mr. Murphy, couldn't we stay while one of your men goes for the police, after all, the groundskeeper is probably miles away by now." "I don't think any of us are in any real danger, do you?" " A-Agnes, maybe Mr. Vincente is right." " Felix, please!" "So, Mr. Murphy, do we stay or do I tell Mr. Lauter that we were forced to quit because of inadequate security?" " No, that won't be necessary." "Jackson, you're going for the police." " Jesus Christ, Murphy!" "How do you manage to stand upright without a backbone?" " Vincente, shut up!" " I'm not goin' anywhere." "I'm gonna find that overgrown abortion and give him a .38 caliber enema!" " You're gonna do what I say or I'm gonna kick your black ass down those stairs!" " Try it and I'll tap dance across your face like Bojangles Robinson!" " Hey, spare me the macho bullshit for now!" "You're gonna have to go for the cops." "Now, hurry back." "You, you're a real neanderfuck, you know that?" "I'm gonna go down and check the rest of the locks." " I think we should try another sitting." " [Frank] Well, I think you should all lock yourselves in your rooms until Jackson gets back with the cops." " [Agnes] Look, it's important that we try" " Like you said, I'm in charge of security." "(eerie and unsettling electronic music)" "(door rattles shut)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(whirring and groaning low tones)" "(engine rumbles to life)" " Shit!" "(birds chirping)" "What the fuck?" "Son of a bitch!" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(Whitney gasps)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(Whitney gasping violently)" "(engine rumbling)" "(car slams into gate)" "(Levi groaning)" "(tires crunching on gravel)" "(Levi screaming)" "(birds chirping)" "(tires crunching on gravel)" "(Levi screaming)" "(approaching engine rumbling)" "(Whitney gasping violently)" "(Whitney moaning)" " Miss O'Shea?" "Miss O'Shea?" "(Whitney moaning)" "Are you all right?" "(Whitney gasping)" "Miss O'Shea?" " What?" " [Tony] Are you OK?" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" " Oh, yeah." "No, oh, I don't know." "I feel so strange." " Maybe you should go lie down for a while." " Yeah." "Oh, first, I need to check the video equipment to see if we've gotten anything strange on tape yet." " [Tony] Like what, reruns of My Mother the Car?" " Mr. Vincente, I know you do not share my beliefs, but is that any reason for you to be so insensitive to them?" " Insensitive, me?" "Nah, I'll have you know I cried like a weenie when Bambi's mother was killed." "I'm sick about it." " [Whitney] Do you honestly find me that amusing, or have I done something to offend you?" " No, I'm sorry." "It's just that I have a real hard time believing in two super-beings eternally struggling for man's immortal soul, come on!" "Doesn't it sound like a premise of a bad comic book to you?" "I'm a detective, I deal in fact and reason." " Nevertheless, there are two very real, very strong forces in the universe, one good, one evil, constantly at odds with one another on a much higher plane of existence than ours." "God does exist and so does Satan, and Avery Lauder is one of his minions." " How can you be so sure?" " [Whitney] Because I've seen it." " Seen what, this higher plane of yours?" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" " When I was nine, my parents took me to the beach." "I couldn't swim, so I just went wading, but I got caught in the undertow and before I knew what was happening, it sucked me under." "As the saltwater quickly enveloped the world around me," "I sank into a dark, peaceful cocoon." "I was drowning but I wasn't frightened, and then high above me, I saw a bright, white light shining down on me, as if from the far end of a long, long tunnel." "I looked down and below me was a vacant, bottomless pit," "and I knew I was standing on the threshold between heaven and hell." "When I regained consciousness," "I was in a hospital bed and I had gained psychic abilities." "And that's how I can be so sure." " You're not gonna believe this, but when I was on the force," "I had a partner who had the very same vision." "He described it to me exactly as you did, then fell off his bar stool and threw up all over my shoes." " This is all just one big joke to you, isn't it?" " No, no it isn't." "You see, Miss O'Shea, I've had to listen to people like you talk about God all my life." "You claim he's the supreme being that's watching over all of us, but then you let him off the hook by blaming all the horrors of the world on the devil." "I don't buy it." "I spent seven years on the street." "I've seen abused children, I've seen rape victims," "I've seen a 12-year-old hooker with a $200 a day habit, and you tell me there's evil in the world," "I say yeah, there is." "I've seen it, but darling, it wasn't wearing horns and a tail." "As for God, ghosts, and the rest of that spiritual mumbo-jumbo, well," "I believe in that as much as I believe in the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, and honest politicians." "(eerie orchestral music)" " I feel very sorry for you, Mr. Vincente." "I'm afraid you're doomed like everyone else in this house." " Oh, why's that?" " Because you can't fight against something if you don't believe it exists, and neither can your two partners." " [Tony] Oh, what about your two partners?" " Agnes and Felix, they think Lauder's ghost is some kind of mass of energy that they can switch on and off like some kind of light." "No, I'm afraid they're doomed also unless we all leave this house right now." " That's the first thing you've said that made any sense." "Unfortunately, the rest of our little group wants to stay, so I suggest you go up to your room, you wait there, and let me finish securing the house." "You can come down and check the rest of your video equipment later." "All right?" "OK?" " All right." " Thank you." "(tape recorder fluttering)" "(tape recorder clicks)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(static crackling)" "(birds chirping)" "(water splashing)" " Indulging in a quiet moment of introspection, or just, uh, looking for blemishes?" " I was just wondering." " Wondering about what?" " Why would Elwin kill Ginger?" " I don't know." "She was naked in the shower, maybe he raped her first." " Probably so, it just seems so senseless." " Name me a killing that isn't senseless." " I suppose, but it has more of an impact when it's someone you know personally." " We didn't really know Ginger all that well, dear." "We only worked with her that one time at the Stonedy Mansion." " I know, but I can't help but feel responsible." "After all, we did bring her here." "We brought all of them here." " And they're all consenting adults over the age of 21." "We didn't put a gun to any of their heads!" " What about Whitney, are you saying you didn't put a gun to her head?" " Whitney is a big girl, Felix." "She didn't have to come if she didn't want to." " Yes, she did, she felt obligated." "You made sure of that." " Felix, have you forgotten what it is we're trying to accomplish here?" " No, of course not." " Then what is bothering you?" " My God, Agnes, are you so blind with ambition that you can't see that you're willing to sacrifice anything or anyone in order to get what you want?" " No, of course not, don't be ridiculous!" " Then why did you insist on staying here when you knew that there's a very good chance that that maniac Elwin is still out there somewhere?" " You know why, because this haunting is the most important we've ever had, and if we left, we might never have gotten a chance to return!" "Think about it, Felix, we could be making history here!" " But at what cost, Agnes?" "We've already lost one of our team!" " And it has absolutely nothing to do with this haunting." "It was tragic, yes, but it doesn't affect what we're doing here." " Doesn't affect what we're doing here?" "Agnes, that girl is dead, and it's our fault!" " No, it isn't!" " Well, it, it will be if somebody else gets killed." " No one else is going to get killed." "You, me, and Whitney are all locked safely in our rooms." "Mr. Murphy is right next door." "Mr. Vincente is securing this house even as we speak." "They're both trained professionals, well-armed and well-equipped to deal with the situation." " Are you honestly that convinced of our safety?" "Or is it you just don't give a damn?" " Felix!" "This is my one chance to finally see the culmination of nine years work!" "My one chance to capture the physical evidence to prove my theory about ghosts!" "Do you have any idea what this could mean to us?" "The respect, the prestige, not to mention the hundreds of thousands of dollars in research grants and private donations?" "It could even mean a, a chair at one of the better universities, or a position with a governmental parapsychology research department!" " Or maybe even a guest appearance on The Tonight Show." "(Agnes sighs)" " Felix, either you're with me or against me." "Which is it?" " Well, darling, of course I with you." "You're my wife." " Good, then as soon as Mr. Vincente has finished securing the house, we'll have another sitting and do what we came to do." "With any luck, we'll be finished before Mr. Jackson even gets back with the police." " I pray to God you're right." " I am." "Now, come back to bed and finish your book." "You'll see, we're all perfectly safe." "(Whitney gasping violently)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(menacing string accent)" "(Frank grunting)" "(crescendo of tense orchestral music)" "(cracking roar)" "(blood splattering)" "(body thumps to the floor)" "(clock ticking)" "Did you hear that?" " No, I didn't hear anything." "(Whitney gasping violently)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(latches rattling)" "(distant clacking)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(menacing string accent)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(distant clacking)" " I'm gonna go check on Whitney." "(clock ticking)" "(Whitney gasping violently)" "Whitney, are you asleep?" "(knocking on door)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(Whitney gasping)" "Oh, God, Whitney!" "Whitney, wake up!" "(knife rips off wall)" "(knife thwacks into post)" "Whitney, snap out of it!" "(Whitney gasps)" " Oh no, oh no (gasping)!" " What happened?" " Lauder's ghost tried to pass through Whitney." " I told you, I couldn't control it!" " It's all right, we caught it before anything happened." " Did we?" "(Whitney gasping for breath)" "(birds chirping)" "(Tony grunting)" "(Tony sighs)" "(Elwin growls)" " You can't stop him!" "He'll rise from the ashes like the phoenix and destroy you!" " Ya, ever heard of mouthwash, you big, ugly fuck!" "(punch thudding)" "(slap cracking)" "(Tony groaning)" "(punch cracking)" "(tense orchestral music)" "(Tony groaning)" "(punch cracking)" "(both grunting as punches continue)" "(glass shattering)" "(punches cracking)" "(Elwin grunts)" "(punches cracking)" "(both grunting as punches continue)" "(knocking on door)" " Mr. Murphy, Mr. Murphy!" "(Felix gasps)" "Oh, God!" "(Tony shrieks)" "(tense orchestral music)" "(axe whooshing)" "(both struggling and groaning)" "(axe whooshing)" "(gunshots cracking)" "(door thumps)" "(gunfire cracking)" "(Elwin grunting)" "(crickets chirping)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(Tony sighs)" " Oh my God, man, what, what happened to you?" " Looks like our friend Elwin isn't miles away from here after all." "Where's Murphy?" " [Agnes] He's dead." " What, are you sure?" " Lauder's ghost tricked me." "He came through Whitney when she was alone in her room." " What are you tellin' me, the ghost killed him?" " Yes, and probably Ginger, too!" "We have to get out of this house right now!" " Gee, why didn't I think of that?" "I want all of you to stay put until I get back." " It's OK, it's OK." "Over here." "(Tony gasping for breath)" "(gun cocking)" "(ammo case rattles)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" " Murphy wasn't killed by any ghost." "He was shot, probably by our pal, Elwin." "Here, wait here, I'll get the van." "(door rattling)" "(ominous and eerie orchestral music)" "(menacing string accent)" "(sighs) Elwin's been a busy boy." "(gunfire cracking)" "(bullets zinging)" "(tense orchestral music)" "(gunfire cracking)" "(explosion rumbling)" "(Tony grunts)" "(explosion rumbling)" "(fire crackling)" " Mr. Vincente, Mr. Vincente, are you all right?" "(gunfire cracking)" "(Felix groans)" "(gunshot cracking)" "(frantic orchestral music)" " Oh, oh God!" "Oh, Felix, Felix!" "You're wounded!" " Yeah, I know." " Is it bad?" " He's not gonna be doing any sit-ups for awhile, but he'll live." " We've gotta get him to a doctor!" " That loud bang you just heard, that was the sound of our bus leaving' without us." "The sun's gone down." "Your husband's in no condition to travel, and I still got the hunchback of Lauder House runnin' around out there!" " I've gotta get out of here!" " [Tony] Now, don't panic!" "We're safe here, we're just gonna sit tight until Levi gets back with the cops." " You don't understand!" "Avery Lauder is trying to complete the immortality ritual that was interrupted two years ago, and he needs a physical medium to do it." "You are not safe as long as I am in this house!" " Fine." " [Agnes] It's OK, Felix, we'll get you to a hospital," "I promise, I promise!" " Here, as long as you got that, you're safe." " This has never actually been tested before!" " What?" "Is that true?" " That's why this haunting was so important to me!" "If my vacuum works, it'll be the most important accomplishment in the history of parapsychology!" " And if it doesn't, we're all ghost-toasties, right?" " Mr. Vincente, the urn is gone." " What?" " The urn with Avery Lauder's ashes, it's missing." "Elwin must have taken it." " So what?" " It's necessary for Avery Lauder's reincarnation." "His soul must be physically reunited with his remains." "You're all in danger unless I leave right now!" " Whitney, that is a lot of religious mumbo-jumbo." " Look, Doctor, up until now, it's been your show and you blew it, so I say we give the religious mumbo-jumbo a shot, 'cause I gotta tell ya, Doc, right now," "I'm willing to swing a dead chicken over my head and howl at the fuckin' moon!" "So how do we stop this reincarnation thing from happening?" " [Agnes] It's only a legend!" " How?" "(Anges sighs)" " Supposedly, if you find Lauder's missing heart and rejoin it with the rest of his remains, then the soul will finally be laid to rest." "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" " OK, I got a good idea where the heart is." "We just gotta find the urn." " Where's Whitney?" " What?" "Oh, shit!" "All right," "I'm gonna go after her." "Elwin shows up, you give him a lobotomy with this." "You understand, you know how to use it?" " I pull this little thingy here, and the bullet comes out here." " You can always throw it at him." "(Felix whimpering)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(crickets chirping)" " (sighs) Agnes, I , I think we should try another sitting." " [Agnes] What?" " Maybe you can trick Lauder's ghost into telling you where the urn is, and even if you can't, I may be able to get a feeling for it while he's speaking through me." " No, Felix, I'm frightened!" " So am I , but I don't see that we have any other choice." "(eerie and ominous orchestral music)" "(Whitney panting)" " [Growling Voice] Whitney!" "(Whitney gasps)" "Whitney!" "Whitney!" "(ghostly howling)" "(swell of ominous orchestral music)" "(jarring orchestral accent)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(jarring percussion accent)" " Shh, shh, shh!" "It's OK, shh!" "Come on, this way." " So, do you still feel strong enough to defeat me?" " Yes, because now I know where your heart is." "In the wall of the basement behind the pentagram." " Very good, but you have discovered my secret too late." " Where is the urn with your ashes?" " [Avery] You cannot prevent what is meant to be." " You're already beaten, Lauder." "The physical medium has left the grounds, and you're powerless without her!" " What, no!" "That's impossible, you lie!" " And the mental medium you now speak through will know where your ashes are, just as he knew where your heart was!" " No, no, no!" " Yes, yes, and he'll tell me, and I'll finally destroy you, you unholy son of a bitch!" " No, the medium will tell you nothing!" "Nothing!" "(Felix groaning)" " Felix!" "Felix, Felix!" "(Felix screaming)" "(splattering explosion rumbling)" "(wind howling)" " Oh, shit, what's the car doing here?" "Oh, God!" "(Whitney gasps)" "That son of a bitch, Elwin!" "I'll blow his fuckin' brains out!" " Don't you understand?" "Elwin didn't do this, Avery Lauder did!" " Either way, Levi's just as dead!" "Look, it's up to you now." "You have to go for the police!" " No, come with me." " I can't, I can't leave the Doctor and her husband alone, and he's in no condition to travel!" "Please, you have to go alone." " OK, OK, you're right." "I'll hurry back." " Good girl, get in the car." "(wind howling)" "I'll get the gate." "Shit." "(gunshot cracking)" "(gate rattling)" "Get the hell outta here!" " OK." "(Elwin growls)" " Hey!" "(tense orchestral music)" "(gunshot cracking)" "(Elwin groans)" "(gunshot cracking)" "(body thumps to the ground)" "(Whitney whimpering)" "It's all right, it's all right, he's dead." "(Elwin growls)" "(gunshots cracking)" "(Elwin groaning)" "Say good night, Gracie." "(Elwin growls)" "(gunshot cracking)" "(Whitney shrieks)" "(Whitney whimpering)" "You OK?" " He was spawn of the devil!" " [Tony] He was a tough motherfucker, I'll give you that." " Believe what you want, but I know he was a demon." " Whatever he was, he's lunch meat now." "Get the hell outta here!" "(engine rumbling to life)" "(Whitney panting)" "(ominous orchestral music)" "(crickets chirping)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(Tony gasping for breath)" "Dr. Goldberg, are you all right?" " He's dead, Felix is dead." " Yeah, well, there's been a lot of that goin' around lately." "C'mon, we gotta get the hell outta here." " No, that bastard murdered my husband, and I am not leaving until I destroy him!" "(Agnes sobbing)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" " Great, suddenly she's Conehead." "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(Agnes panting)" "(water dripping)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "Uh-uh, wait, I'll trade you." " You didn't have to bring this, you know." "We're not in any danger anymore." "With Whitney gone, Lauder's ghost can no longer physically manifest itself in our world." " I just watched our friend Elwin take more lead than a number two pencil, so you'll excuse me if I play it safe." "(Tony grunting)" "(engine rumbling)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(ominous orchestral music)" " OK, Lauder, you son of a bitch!" "I gotcha now!" "(engine revs)" "(truck horn honking)" "(Whitney screams)" "(truck engine roaring)" "(tires screeching)" "(Whitney gasping for breath)" "(engine idling)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" " That's it, Avery Lauder's heart." "(distant thud)" "(water dripping)" " Shh." "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(engine rumbling to a stop)" "(Whitney sighs)" " Oh, thank God (sighs)!" "(distant car horns honking)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping steadily)" "(distant car horns honking)" "(door rattling)" " Shit!" "(Whitney gasps)" "O'Shea, what are you doin' here?" "Did you bring the cops?" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral accent)" " Oh, my God, it was all just an illusion!" "Lauder tricked me, I never even left the grounds!" "(Whitney gasping violently)" " Give her the vacuum." " [Agnes] It's too late, Lauder's ghost is coming through!" " [Tony] What do we do?" " [Agnes] I don't know!" " [Tony] You're supposed to be the expert!" " Look out!" "(shovel whooshing)" "(body thuds)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(door slamming)" "No, (whimpers)!" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping intensely)" "(Agnes gasping)" "(Agnes screams)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(Agnes gasps)" "(axe whooshing)" "(axe crunches into bone)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping intensely)" "(Whitney gasping violently)" "(Tony groans)" "(Whitney gasping and moaning)" "(throaty growl)" "(ghostly wailing)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping very intensely)" "(low rumbling)" "(axe clangs to floor)" "(low rumbling)" "(Tony groaning)" "(Whitney gasps)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping intensely)" "(Whitney gasping)" "(Tony sighs)" " (gasps) What happened, is it over?" " Yeah, I trapped him in this." "Looks like Dr. Goldberg was right after all, huh?" " No, it's not gonna hold him." " What?" " I can feel him in there, struggling to get out." "It's not gonna hold him, he is too powerful." " All right, that's it." "We're gettin' the hell outta here!" " No, there's not enough time!" "We have got to destroy him by rejoining his heart with his ashes." " All right, all right." "Look, here's the heart, I don't know where the urn is." " We have to find it fast!" " I know that, it could be anywhere!" " Well, you're the detective, think!" " I thinking, I'm thinking!" "OK, if I were an urn full of ashes, where would I be?" "All right." "(eerie and ominous electronic music)" " [Both] The chapel." "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(electromagnetic vacuum beeping intensely)" "(beeping increases in pitch)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(intense, high-pitched beeping)" "(low rumbling)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(intense, high-pitched beeping)" "(low rumbling)" "(wind whooshing)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" " It's not here." " What, am I holding a white cane," "I can see it's not here, what now?" " I don't know." " God, this has been a lousy day!" "(both gasping for breath)" "(intense low rumbling)" "(clock ticking)" "(water dripping)" "(intense, high-pitched beeping)" "(intense low rumbling)" "(whooshing electronic effects)" "(water dripping)" "(crickets chirping)" "(water dripping)" "(explosion rumbling)" "(tense and menacing orchestral music)" "(throaty growls)" "(ghostly wailing)" "(Whitney gasping)" "Whitney, Whitney!" "(throaty growls)" "(Whitney grunts)" "(Tony groans)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(drawer creaking)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(ashes rattling)" "(eerie and unsettling orchestral music)" "(urn thuds to the ground)" "(mysterious and eerie orchestral music)" "Miss O'Shea?" "Miss O'Shea?" "(crickets chirping)" "Miss O'Shea?" "Miss O'Shea?" "Wh-Whitney?" "Whitney?" "(jarring orchestral accent)" "(Tony gasps)" "(Avery chuckling)" "(ominous and menacing orchestral music)" "What did you do with Whitney?" " It's ended, I've won." " Yeah, here's your trophy, asshole!" "(gunshots cracking)" "(glass shattering)" " You'll have to do much better than that, Mr. Vincente." " (gasping) I'm open to suggestions." "(Avery growls)" " I'm going to enjoy killing you much more than the others, Mr. Vincente, and then I'm going to eat your soul, just as I ate my own ashes (cackles)!" " Eat this!" "(gunshot cracking)" "(Tony groans)" "(menacing orchestral music)" " You can't kill me, I'm immortal." "I have no heart." "(eerie orchestral music)" " OK, I'm a believer." "(gunshot cracking)" "(Avery grunts)" "(gunshots cracking)" "(Avery grunting)" "(gun clicking)" "(Avery growling)" "(Tony groaning)" "(tense orchestral music)" "(Tony groaning)" "(glass shattering)" "(Avery groaning)" "(box splattering)" "(Avery groaning)" "(Avery shrieking)" "(fire roaring)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(flesh oozing and splattering)" "(eerie orchestral music)" "(menacing orchestral accent)" "(skull cracking)" "(crickets chirping)" "(Tony gasping for breath)" " Mr. Vincente, you're still alive!" "(Tony gasping for breath)" " I'm glad you think so." "I'm not so sure what I believe anymore." "(Tony gasping for breath)" "(eerie and ominous orchestral music)" "(birds chirping)" "(phone ringing)" "Vincente Detective Agency." " [Woman On Phone] Yes, are you the people who worked that haunted house?" " No, I'm sorry, you must have the wrong number." " [Woman On Phone] Is this Tony Vincente?" " Yes, this is Tony Vincente." "No, I don't do haunted houses." " [Woman On Phone] Well, I was just reading an article" " I do unfaithful wives, runaway husbands, every now and then, I'll get a cat out of a tree if I can get a clear shot at his lil' tabby ass." " [Woman On Phone] Well, the article in the New York Times distinctly said you had done" " I don't care what the article said, lady." "I don't do haunted houses." " [Woman On Phone] This just must be a joke, then." " No, I don't think it's a joke, and I don't think you got a ghost in your house, either." "It's probably just faulty wiring." " [Woman On Phone] Well, how can you be so sure of that?" " How can I be so sure?" "Because if you had a ghost, lady, you wouldn't have to ask me." " [Woman On Phone] Is that right." " It's not something you forget." "Believe me, I've tried." "It just kinda stays with you for the rest of your life." " [Woman On Phone] Listen, Vincente," "I don't care much for your attitude." " Yeah, well, I don't care too much for my attitude, either, but I'm kinda stuck with it." " [Woman On Phone] Just take a plane and leave, mister." " Yeah, same to you, and the broom you rode in on!" "(phone rattling)" "(distant traffic humming)" "(eerie and ominous orchestral music)" "(crescendo of menacing orchestral music)" "(Tony gasps)" "(Tony sighs)" "(distant traffic humming)" "(rhythmic and unsettling orchestral music)" "(rhythmic funk music accent)"