"Well, I'm off to dinner..." "at Todd's." "Todd's?" "Wasn't the brother in love with your girlfriend?" "Yeah, well, apparently that's over." "And I'm just supposed to let it go." "And I'd like to let it go, Bowie, I would." "I'd like to wheel his wheelchair into traffic and let it go." "You going to hell, Nate." "And I'm bringing the wine." "Hey, Bowie, who do you think does a better National Anthem" "William Shatner or Justin Guarini?" "Well, now, that depends." "Do you want a simple headache, or would you like actual blood to come out of your ears?" "It's for Ryan's peewee basketball tournament." "I'm assistant coach." "Which means only 88 more hours of community service to go." "Well, uh, for something as important as our National Anthem," "I think it'de better if you had a professional singer do it live." "And I think it'd be better if I had a point guard who knew how to properly wipe himself." "I was talking about me." "Bowie, it's peewee basketball." "Why would you wanna do it?" "Because you never know who's gonna be in the audience." "I heard a rumor Christina Aguilera was discovered singing in the shower." "I'm guessing by the record producer she was showering with." "That's what I'm saying." "It's all about networking." "Committed" " Season 1 episode 12 The Perfect Person Episode Part 1" "Hi, you!" "Ooh, hold on, Marni." "Heh heh." "We don't want to make the new girlfriend jealous." "Oh, what the heck-- what she doesn't know." "Right, Nate?" "Oops." "Turned my head!" "Awkward!" "Well, come in, come in, come in." "I wanna introduce you guys to Natalie." "Sweetheart..." "Oh!" " Hi." " Hi." "Todd's told me all about you." "Natalie just finished her post graduate work at MIT." "Wait a second-- didn't you go there, too, Nate?" "Uh, yeah, I did, actually." "Really?" "What department." " Logistical Mathematics." " Get out!" "Applied Mathematics." "Whoa!" "Geek alert!" "Well, listen, since we're exploringan Asian theme tonight, I thought it would be cool if we all sat on the floor." "So, Marni, I want you sit there." "And, Natalie, Sweetheart, I want you to sit right over there." "Mm-hmm, just sit there." "That's perfect." "And, oh, actually-- excuse me." "I was thinking that we sit girl-boy, girl-boy." " Yeah, but I'm a boy" " Just sit right there, Nate." "Thank you." "Mm-hmm, mm-hmm." "Sit, sit, sit." "Yes, yes, yes." "Well, isn't this nice?" "Isn't this nice?" "You're a little flaky up top there, Nate." "Marni, you have to try one of these grapes." "So, Nate, what have you been doing since you graduated?" " Well, I-I've been working on" " Oh, my God, Todd, they're delicious." "Working in what?" "Try one of the black ones." "They're even sweeter." "Nate, you said you've been working..." "What?" "Oh, I'm-- Uh, in a used record store." " Get out!" "That is so cool!" "I collect vinyl." " Oh, you do?" "Yeah!" "Oh, I got so irate when I read this article in the Village Voice about how" "Coltrane's Love Supreme sounded better on CD." " Yeah, I wrote a letter to the editor." "I was Pissed Off in Manhattan." " I was Angry in Cobble Hill." "Isn't that cute?" "You two both wrote letters, Nate-alie." "Oh...did I just say Nate-alie?" "Huh, it's funny how your names just kind of fit together like that." "Marni, would you like an egg roll?" "Whoa!" "Whoa, whoa." "I think Natalie might like an egg roll." "Here..." "Marni, you want some grapes?" "Here, you want some more grapes?" "Here, I'll give you grapes." "Yeah." "I would give you grapes all night long." "I am not being ridiculous." "He's still in love with you." "My God, what is it with you and Todd?" "He has girl friend." "Yeah, who he didn't pay attention to all night." "Hello." "Oh, hi, Todd." "Oh, no, I'm so sorry." "Okay, well, try to get some sleep." "Okay...bye." "Todd and Natalie just broke up." "Aha!" " Of course he broke up with her." " What's that supposed to mean?" "Marni, he planned this." "Todd's girlfriend wasn't there for Todd." "She was there for me." "For you?" "Don't you see?" "It's so obvious!" "He's" " Oh, ho ho ho ho!" "He found a girl that went to the same school as me, has the same interests as me, is exactly my type." "And then-- then he breaks up with her, hoping that I'll go for her, which would leave him free to pursue you, which was his intent all along." "She's exactly your type?" "I-I didn't say that." " Yeah, ya did!" "You're missing the point!" " Look, Todd found the perfect woman for me because he's still in love with you!" " Oh!" "Oh!" "She's perfect now?" "!" "On paper!" "Not as a person!" "As a set of characteristics that--that-- I love you." "I love you so much." "But if you didn't-- if you'd never met me you would ask Natalie out, wouldn't you?" "She's pretty, smart, a huge nerd." "But--but I did meet you, Marni." "I met you, and it's fate, and we're together!" "I thought it was fate, but maybe it's fate for you and Natalie." "Maybe you needed to meet me to meet Todd to meet her." "That's asinine." "Is it?" "You both say words like "asinine."" "What are the odds that two people who are so perfect for each other would be at the same dinner at the same time, huh?" "Hmm, well, when you factor in the statistical probabilities in a city of this size, and you cross-reference it and you cross-reference it with the fact that, uh, Todd planned it that way!" "Pretty damn good." "You're gonna have to go out with her." "What?" "!" "You have to go on a date with her." "If you don't, we'll always wonder." " I won't!" " Well, I will." "Nate, you have to do it." "For us." "If you're at all committed to this relationship, you'll go out with someone else." "So, Bowie, the big game's tomorrow." "You all set for your big number?" " You know this." " Great." "Lay it on me." "* Oh, say, can you see *" "* By the dawn's early-- *" "Oh, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop." "What?" "Did I go flat or something?" "No, your singing's fine." "It's just, you know, do you have to, like, grab yourself like that?" "What?" "Did I do that?" "Like you're checking a French bread for freshness." "Okay." "Okay, okay, cool." "It's cool." "A'ight, it's cool." "I got this." "Right on." "Here we go." "Okay..." "* Oh, say, can you see *" "* By the dawn's early-- * *" "Bowie!" "What?" "!" "I did it again?" "Man, I hate to tell ya..." "I think your crotch is your crutch." "I'm glad we're doing this, Nate." "I have to tell you, the other night" "I really thought you were with Marni." "I was a little surprised when you asked me out." "Yeah, me too." "Oh, oh, no." "We don't need candles, um..." " Wow, this is nice." " You think?" "A little dark." " Uh, you know, Natalie" " Excuse us for interrupting, but we just had to tell you what a darling couple you are." "Oh, no, we're not a" " This is just a date." "Oh, we had our first date here too." "50 wonderful years ago tonight." "Oh, that's sweet." "Yeah, old people are sweet until you realize most of them are racist." "Nate?" "It's for you." "It's...your mother?" "He'll have to call you back." "Clown..." "I did something really, really stupid." "I sent the man I love on a date with a woman who's perfect for him." "Yeah, I thought that was a little weird too." " I can't believe you ordered champagne." " No, no, it wasn't me." "Nate, this is all so romantic." "Yeah, pretty much defies the"odds of how perfect your first date can go, doesn't it?" "Ha ha ha, Yeah, it does." "Oh, no." "This is gonna be weird." "Todd did not take it well when I broke up with him." " Wh-whoa, what?" "You broke up with him?" " Yeah." "I thought he broke up" " Oh, God." "Nate!" "What are you doing with my girlfriend?" "Excuse me, I need to get through here." "I am so sorry." "Thank you." "Pardon me, pardon me." "Thank you." "The man stole my girlfriend!" "Excuse me." "I'm sorry." "Pardon me." "That man right there!" "He took my girlfriend!" " Look, Todd, I'm sorry!" " You two together?" "This is just like being hit by a semi all over again." "Todd, I thought you wanted me to go out with Natalie." "I thought you broke up with her." "No, Nate, I was just on my way by to try to convince her to take me back when I looked in the window, and I saw you two hold" " Oh, God, this hurts so much." " Todd, you'll find the right person." "You just have to have everything I want, don't you, Nate?" "Marni, Natalie." "Why stop there?" "Why don't you just take my chair, Nate?" "Todd-- No, come on." "I want you to take my chair." "Excuse me, can you come dump me out of this chair so I can give it to the guy who stole my girlfriend?" " Just give me a little push." " Todd, please!" "Todd, stop, please." "I don't want your chair." "I don't want his chair." "Well, I guess this is good-bye." "Excuse me." "Guess there's nothing else to say but congratulations, Nate." "You win again!" "Excuse me." "Oh, no, I'm so sorry." "Pardon me." "Excuse me." "I guess happy endings really only happen in the movies." "* And the home *" "* Of the *" "* Brave *" "Very nice." "You touched yourself fourteen times." "Damn!" "It's like I don't even know I'm doing it." "Yeah, I know, but, Bowie, there's gonna be a gymnasium full of kids." "You gotta do it without... your backup singer." " Hey." " He's not back yet." "Oh, I know." "At first I was worried." "But I figured it all out." "They go to the restaurant, ten minutes of chit-chat." "Half hour of Nate questions for the waiter." "Dee dee dee, talk, talk, talk." "Seven minutes for him to tell her he's in love with me." "She says, "Marni's so pretty." "I can't compete with that."" "They hug like friends." "20 minutes for him to walk back, and he should be here right... now!" "Now!" "Now!" "Now!" "Now!" "Now!" " Marni!" " Now!" "Marni, Marni, Marni." "You have absolutely nothing to worry about." "That boy loves you." "I know." "Why is this making me so crazy?" "Well, if it helps, you had a running start." "This is silly." "I'm just being ridiculous." "Now!" "Okay, come on." "I want you to go home and take a warm bath." "Okay?" "And chill." "Seriously, you gotta get a hold of yourself." "You, not so much." "Nate?" "Well, what are you doing here?" "Did you decide to take some of my home furnishings too?" "I have a fondue pot that I happen to love." "Shall I wrap that up for you?" "Look, Todd..." "I'm sorry." "I'm not into Natalie." "I-I thought you were setting me up." "And Marni made me..." "Look, it was just a huge misunderstanding." "That's all." "And I-I just wanted you to know that I" " I'm sorry." "I appreciate that, Nate." "And you know what?" "Other than you having every advantage in life, we're not that different, you and me." "Can't we try and be friends?" "Uh, okay, sure, Todd." "I'd--I'd like that." "Come here." "Ohh, Nate!" "You know what?" "This calls for a drink." "We must toast to our new friendship." "Bond as men do." "Yeah." "You know what?" "We should go to the local barand toss back a couple of ice cold pineapple mojitos." "I'm serious!" "I'm serious." "We should do it." "We should go to Mount Rushmore." "Whoo!" "Road trip!" "Road trip!" "No, no, no, I'm serious." "No, no, no." "I'm being serious." "We should" " We have to do this." "We have to drive to the Mount Rushmore." " Well, then, it's on, baby." " It's on." "Whoo!" "You know, I don't usually drink so much, you know?" "'Cause I don't like to lose control." "But--but yum, yum, yum, yum!" "Why do I feel like I'm rolling?" "Oh!" "Because I am!" "Give me a hand, Nate." "Oh, here we go." "Oh, thank you, Nate." "Nate, Nate, Nate." "Why has it been so hard for us to become friends?" "I don't know." "I mean, it did sort of bug me when you told my girlfriend you loved her." "Oh!" "That bothered you?" "I did not know that." "We have to talk about that." "It'sool, it's cool." "We're buddies now." "Hey!" "Hey!" "Gimme a hug." "Oh, God." "You know what?" "You know what?" "I would like to propose a toast." "Oh!" "Oh!" "Ha!" "To Nate Solomon." "A man who can't hold his liquor." "From a man who can." "Ahem." "Revenge is sweet, Nate." "And I do still love Marni." "And nothing will stop me from having her." "Well, who's ready for that road trip?" "Good morning." "On behalf of the Manhattan Youth Peewee Basketball, I'd like to welcome you all and remind those of you that need to use the potty, please do it now." "And now, here to perform our National Anthem is singer/songwriter Bowie James." "Currently seeking representation." "* Oh, say can you see *" "* Oh, say, can you see *" "* By the dawn's early light *" "* What so *" "* Proudly we hailed *" "* At the twilight's last gleaming?" "*" "* Whose broad stripes and bright stars *" "* Through the perilous fight *" "* O'er the ramparts we watched *" "* Were so gallantly streaming *" "He still hasn't called." "Thank you." "Come on, Nate." "Pick up, pick up." "Where are you, anyway?" "Hello?" "Nate, God." "I've been trying to call." "Oh, yeah, I guess I had my phone turned off." "Oh..." "I was worried." "Where are you?" "I'm, uh..." "I'm not sure." "Good morning, sleepy head." "I'm gonna have to call you back."