"Stop thief!" "They fear me, Hastings." "The criminals, they fear Hercule Poirot so much that they have repented of their naughty ways and they have become citizens of the most upright." "Rubbish, Poirot." "I say, look at that schooner!" "Rubbish, do you say, Hastings?" "I don't imagine that most of them have ever heard of Hercule Poirot." "Uh!" "You strike a man while he is down, eh?" "I wish you were right." "Then I would be retiring early." "It strikes me they're getting even cleverer, I'm affraid, my old friends." "I had a case last week you would have liked, Poirot." "At the moment, my dear Inspector, I would like any case at all." "Burlington Arcade, broad daylight." "Fellow walks in, pulls a gun and helps himself to a handful of precious stones." "My dear Japp, that sounds quite ordinary." "The good it is still to come." "Now, this robber hasn't gone five yards when he is seized by a couple of passing citizens and held until a Constable arrives." "Constable marches him after the station, and there's the stones in his pocket." "Very good, very public spirit of work by the worthy passes by." "Except..." "Except that what, Inspector?" "The stones in his pocket aren't the real stones." "He's passed the real ones to a confederate, one of the before mentioned worthy citizens." " I say!" " Not bad, eh?" "I hope he gets ten years." "Yes, very good." "Mais pas de finesse, seulement de l'audace." "But yes, it is not badly imagined." "You know, Hastings, sometimes I wish that I was not of such a moral disposition." "Really?" "Would not Hercule Poirot do better than any criminal?" "Hercule Poirot would use his little grey cells." "Hercule Poirot would change his modus operandi for every crime." "Scotland Yard would never be able to pin me down." "Ah!" "Hastings, Hastings..." "To work against the law, for a change..." "I think it would be quite pleasing." "Imagine it, every morning, a new crime, eh?" "" Read all about it!" "Monsieur Big reveals everything! "" " Yes, Miss Lemon?" " A lady came to see you, Mr. Poirot." "Ah, bon!" " What sort of lady, Miss Lemon?" " Well exactly, Cpt.Hastings, it was hard to tell." "You couldn't see her face, for the veil she was wearing." "Where is she now, Miss Lemon?" "She said she had a matter of the utmost importance to consult you about and would you go to see her at the Athena Hotel." " And what does she call herself?" " She wouldn't leave a name." " Room number at the hotel?" " She wouldn't leave a number." "Is it any wonder that my business it is crumbling about my eyes." "Bonjour, mademoiselle." "You must be Monsieur Poirot." "I'm sorry I couldn't stay at your office, but I think I am being watched, you see." "Watched, mademoiselle?" "I can hardly believe that anyone can help me, but I've heard such wonderful things about you." "Perhaps you can do the impossible." "The impossible, it pleases me always." "Allow me to introduce you my associate, Captain Hastings." "How do you do?" "Continue, I beg of you." "You've heard of Lady Millicent Castle Vaughan?" "The Earl of Killarney's daughter?" " I am Lady Millicent." " Oh, I say!" "..." "Thank you." "You may have read of my engagement to the Duke of Southshire." "Yes, indeed!" "They say it will be the marriage of the year." "I did not know that you were such an expert on the social calendar, Hastings." "It's too public, here." "I shall trust you." "My, well!" "So kind." "There is a man, horrible man..." "His name is Lavington." "There was a letter I wrote..." "I was only sixteen, at the time." "A letter that you wrote to this Monsieur Lavington?" "Oh, no!" "To a young man, he was going to an expedition up the Orinoco." " He never came back." " Rotten luck." " I was very fond of him." " I understand." "It was a foolish letter, an indiscreet letter, but nothing more." "But there were phrases in it which might bare a different interpretation." "I see." "So, it is this letter that has come into the hands of Monsieur Lavington?" "Yes." "And he threatens to send it to my fiancé unless I send him an enormous amount of money." "Dirty swine!" "I beg your pardon, Lady Millicent..." "How much is he asking?" "Twenty thousand pounds." "It's impossible!" "I doubt if I could raise thousand, even." " And you have seen this letter?" " Yes, I went to his house, in Wimbledon." "He held it out for me to see." "I tried to snatch it, but he was too quick for me." "So, where is it now?" "He folded it up and put it in a little wooden box." "A Chinese puzzle box, he called it." "" It will safe in there ", he said." "" And the box itself is hidden in such a clever place," "" that you will never find it "." "It is repelent to me that you should pay to this man even one penny!" "Hear, hear!" "No, the ingenuity of Hercule Poirot will defeat your enemies." "Yes..." "Please be so kind as to send to me this Mr. Lavington." "I don't see why this Lavington fellow should give up the letter just because we ask him to." "What a stunning girl, though..." "I sometimes think, mon ami, that you are too easily stunned." " Thank you." " Thank you, sir" "Whitehaven Mansions, please, driver." "This is interesting, Poirot." "" Englishman found mysteriously dead, in Holland. "" "Always they say that, Hastings." "Later, they find that he has eaten the tinned fish and that his death is perfectly natural." "Oh!" "If you're determined to look on the black side..." "He won't come now, will he, Mr. Poirot?" "But perhaps he is frightened of us, eh, Miss Lemon." " I'll stay, if you like..." " Non, non, non, thank you." "But Captain Hastings and I, we'll manage." " Well, good night, Mr. Poirot." " Good night." " Good night, Captain Hastings." " Good night, Miss Lemon." "I hope you have a pleasant evening." "It's him!" "It's him!" "I'm sure it's him!" "Calm yourself, Miss Lemon." "It is a simple blackmailer." "There's something nasty about blackmail, Mr. Poirot." "You have nothing to fear of that, I'm sure." "Now, please be so kind as to let M. Lavington in, as you go." "Mr. Lavington to see you." "Well, well, well..." "So, this is the famous Hercule Poirot, is it?" "It is, Monsieur." "The Castle Vaughan girl said that you wanted to see me." "Does she think that I'm going to change my mind?" "Perhaps she does." "She must think that I'm an idiot, then." "Perhaps you are." " Try me." " Very well." "Lady Millicent does not have twenty thousand pounds, or anything like it." "Really?" "Just because she's got a title, doesn't mean she is rich." "Oh, I'm sure some of her gentlemen friends will be willing enought to oblige such a pretty women with her level." "Particularly if she went the right way about it, right?" "..." " You swine!" " Hastings, please." "I say, what an excitible office boy you have." "Lady Millicent might rise with difficulty the sum of five thousand pounds." "Five?" "You will have you little joke, won't you?" "Hercule Poirot does not joke, Monsieur." "Well, gentlemen, we don't seem to be going much further." "I have something for sale." "Either I get my price or I don't." "There's no room for bargainning." "It would appear, Monsieur Lavington, that you are quite experienced in these matters, uh?" "All right..." "I'll let the Lady Millicent off cheaply, as she's a charming girl." " Go on." " Will say... eighteen thousand." " That is not so cheap." " Take it, or leave it." "I'm off to Paris today, I should be back on Tuesday." "Unless eighteen thousand is paid by Tuesday evening, the Duke gets the letter." "À toute à l'heure, Messieurs." "Hastings?" "Hastings?" "Hastings?" " Lost him." " Monsieur Lavington?" " He got into a cab." " What did you want him for?" "I was going to follow him, to find out where he lives." " We know where he lives." " Well, I don't." "Oh, yes." "Lady Millicent has already told us." "He lives at Wimbledon." "Oh, yes!" "Wimbledon is a pretty big place, you know?" "I had an aunt who lived in Wimbledon." "And an uncle, actually." "I used to go and stay there sometimes..." "Buona Vista, Cedars Avenue." "Oh..." "I see." "Its a volume packed with useful informations, Hastings." "You never think of looking for other people's addresses in the telephone directory, do you?" "Yes, Hastings, I do." "Why did you wish to know where Monsieur Lavington lives, Hastings?" "I don't know." "It was so beastly, the way he talked about Lady Millicent." "I wanted to kick him down the stairs." "You wanted to do it in the comfort of his own home, yes?" "What?" "Well, no..." "I dunno." "Something has got to be done." "Something is going to be done, Hastings." "You're going to his house!" "You're going to his house while he is in Paris!" "You're going to his house, while he's in Paris  and you're going to burglar it!" " You should be around the side." " Comment?" "Tradesmen around the side." " You're not selling onions, are you?" " Pardon?" "You people, coming over here doing that a lot." " M. Lavington came to see me." " He sees a good many people." "I'm not responsible for all that." "I'm only the housekeeper." "And I am the locksmith." "I specialize in burglarproof locks." "He didn't say anything to me about it." "But I can't say I'm surprised, the way the things are, round here." " You better come in." " Thank you." "Wipe your feet." "It hasn't been the same round here, since they started the tennis up the road." "They get all this riffraff (scum) come to watch." "Very hard alarmed to hear them speach, but you're not safe at your own home, are we?" "All these people asking directions, wanting café..." " I don't know where they think they are." " Indeed no, madame." "It's been beyond all, since that Fred Perry won again this year." "Now, M. Lavington was most eager that I should fix this special locks whilst he was in Paris." " Oh...!" "That's where he is, is it?" "I can't keep up with him." " Well, you get on with it, then..." " Thank you." "Uh, madame, Monsieur Lavington omitted to tell me your name." " You're called, madame?" " Godber." "Charming." "How come you being a locksmith here, when you're French?" " Because I am not French, madame." " No?" " No." " Where are you from, then?" "Madame Godber, tell me, what is the country that is very full of the mountains, and divided into cantons?" "You're never Chinese!" "Non, non, madame." "Switzerland." "A country famous for its watches, fot its clocks, and for its locks." "I heard about the watches." "My late husband had one, God rest his soul." "Never did it much good." "Well, I can't stand here talking." "I get to have my work done and get home, to Streatham." "Ah!" "I was under the impression that you lived in, madame." "Oh, no!" "I certainly don't!" "I'm finished here at six, don't matter what." "I shall be back at the same time tomorrow, madame." "Until then, please don't let anyone touch the windows, they are connected up, already." " Connected how?" "To the electricity." " I can't see any wires." " Naturally." "Hastings!" "Use caution, the policeman patrols every seventeen minutes." "How did you do that?" "Do not put on the lights." "The neighbors will see." " Anything?" " No." "Me neither." "Is Hercule Poirot to be beaten?" "Never!" "I've searched everywhere, I've even taken the fruit out of the fruit bowl." "Hastings, let us be calm." "Let us reason." "Let us ... enfin!" "Let us employ the little grey cells." "I am an imbécil!" "The kitchen!" "The kitchen?" "That's impossible!" "What about the servants?" "They'd be bound to come across it." "Exactly!" "That is just what ninety nine people out of one hundred would say." "And for that very reason the kitchen is the ideal place to choose." "En avant!" "It can't be buried under the coal." "If you use your eyes, you'll see that is not the coal that I examine." "Officer!" "Officer!" "Hold the light for me, Hastings." "Your knife, if you please." "Well done!" "Gently with the voice." "Extraordinary place." "Any one might have used the logs." "In July?" "And it was hidden at the bottom of the pile." "A very ingenious hiding place." "You know, I think this will be quite a tease to open." "All right, boys, the game's up." "I want you to come quietly now." "Officer, I want to explain..." "My friend and I are here at the request of M. Lavington..." "It's him!" "He's the main one!" "Never mind about the other one." "Madame Godber..." "It makes you shiver when you use your own name, doesn't it?" "I knew it would be him." "Pretending to talk in that silly accent..." "Right, my lad, you coming down to the station." "He tried to tell me some cock-and-bull story about being Chinese..." " Madame..." " Don't you "madame" me, you tyke!" "Inspecting the joint, that's what he was doing." "I fooled him, though!" "Told him I didn't live here." "I was suspicious right from the start, you see." "Look at his his eyes." " Officer" " Look at his shifty little eyes." " You can always tell, can't you?" " Come on, "Sonny Jim"." "It's time to lockup, for you.!" " Morning, Sir." " Morning." "Vicious looking character, isn't he?" " He hasn't been any trouble." " Nah, he's too clever for that." "We wanted to get our hands on him for months." "Apart from not giving a name." " What is his name?" " This is not funny, Japp." "Well, nobody knows his real name." "But everyone calls him " Mad Dog "." "Mad Dog, eh?" "One fancy ring." "One pair of pince-nez spectacles." "One..." "What is that?" "That is my moustache comb." "Moustache comb?" "You didn't tell me he was one of this "unnatural sort"." "Just give him his things." "What I don't undestand is how did you get to Lavington's house so quick, Poirot." " I only heard myself last night." " Heard what, Inspector?" "Well, about Lavington being murdered in Amesterdan." " Murdered?" "When?" " When?" "Last week, of course." " Last week?" " Last Tuesday." "But you knew that." "Yes." "Yes, of course..." "Good morning, Hastings." "You are well, yes?" " This is impossible, you know!" "I am glad to see you so rested this morning, Hastings." "And what a turn of speed, you displayed last night." "What agility to jump through the window, uh?" "..." "And to leave your poor old friend Poirot "in the soup"." "Oh!" "If I hadn't manage to escape and get Japp to bail you out, you would have ended before the Wimbledon beak (Judge), this morning." "Housebreak, in the very least." "I didn't have a very good night, anyway, as a matter of fact." "Couldn't sleep a wink trying to get this thing open." "My heart goes out to you, Hastings." "I don't think it's a box at all." "I think it's a solid block from wood." "Really?" "I'm usually pretty good at anything mechanical." "You try." "I think we should take a hammer to it ." "Un moment, mon ami." "Perhaps poor old Poirot can do it." "Hastings, what a cracksman was lost when Hercule Poirot decided to become the world's greatest detective, hm?" "Is that it?" "Lady Millicent's letter?" "Oh!" "You're not going to read it?" "How will I be able to tell it, if it is Lady Millicent's letter, if I do not read it?" "First, burglary..." "Now this." "Oui, c'est charmant." "It's her, Lady Millicent." "She wants to see you." "But..." " At her hotel, in one hour." " She says her hotel isn't safe." "Well, where then?" "Strange circomstances arisen which will be of use, I think, Hastings." " Oh, really?" " Mr. Lavington is dead." "Good Heavens!" "In fact, he was already dead when he came to see us on Friday." "Already dead when he-- ...?" "He was your " Englishman found misteriously dead in Holland "." "Found dead in Holland?" "But how did he get to London?" " It must've been someone else!" " Good, Hastings." "Very good!" "Oh, Monsieur Poirot!" "How wonderful!" "How did you do it?" "By the methods rather reprehensible, I'm afraid, my Lady." "Oh, dear..." "In an operation very difficult and dangerous Captain Hastings was particularly valuable." "But I'm sure Monsieur Lavington will not prosecute." "Oh!" "How can I ever thank you both?" "Where was it hidden?" "In the Chinese box, just as you said." "And the Chinese box was hidden inside a fire log." "And you found it!" "Oh, you are both wonderful, wonderful men!" " Where is it now?" " Comment?" "The Chinese box." "Where is it now?" " The box?" " Hm." "I don't know." "You don't know?" "One would hardly lose a like that, surely." "Hastings, whatever did we do with that box?" "Didn't you throw it away?" "Oh, surely not!" "It was such a beautiful little box!" "No, I remember, now..." "You put it in your pocket." "Voilà!" "There it is." "Isn't it lovely?" "I looks pretty ordinary to me." "You can buy it for the top, over in Limehouse." "Oh, no!" "I would dearly love to keep it as a souvenir, to remind me of such a very clever French gentleman." " Belgian." " How quaint." "And I had hopes that you permit me to keep her, to remind me of a very beautiful English Lady." "Oh, but I shall give you a much bettet souvenir than that, on my wedding day." "You shall not find me ungrateful, Monsieur Poirot." "And I have far more pleasure, my Lady, in serving you than to receive the money check." "You must permit that I retain the box." "But Monsieur Poirot, you don't understand..." "I simply must have" "I think not." "What do you mean?" "Inside this box is a cavity." "This cavity is divided into two halves." "Observe, please." "Into the one half, was the compromising letter." "And in the other..." "If I am not wrong, the jewels from the necklace stolen in the Burlingto Arcade robbery." "Precisely." " Oh, no!" " Hello, Gertie." "Good, nabbed!" "You know each other?" "Gertie runs the best tomfoolery gang in the country." " Tomfoolery?" " Jewelry." " Does he know everything?" " Non." "How did you go get yourself mixed up with this East Lavington fellow, Gertie, that's what I can't make out." "Me neither." "Nasty bit of work, that he what he was." "Blackmailer in all sorts." "Don't I know it?" "He done the dirty on us." "But he was in it, to give me the hint of the robbery in the first place." "He found out about the jewels for one of the poor devils he was was blackmailing." " And he rode himself in." " That's right." "He persuaded me to let him be one of the civilans who caught up Shiner." "And this Shiner handed the "tomfoolery" over to Lavington?" "That's right." "Lavington agreed to meet us in his house, in Wimbledon, but he didn't show up, did he?" "The crook." "And I didn't know where he'd hidden the tom, either." "But he showed me before, where he put the letter, and so, I guessed perhaps he might had hidden the jewelry in the same place." "And so, my dear mademoiselle, you decided to call in Hercule Poirot to do your searching for you, uh?" "Well I'd heard you "was" good." "So, you put the fix on Lavington and then your people followed him to Holland and that's where they killed him, eh?" " All right, you!" " Sorry?" "Sorry you'll be, my lad." "We've got reasons to believe you've got stolen museum exhibits concealed about your person." "What?" " Wait!" "She's getting away!" " Sapristi!" "Elle s'en va!" " Do you have the box?" " Never mind the box!" "I've got the tom!" " Look at the warrant card!" " Ah!" "We know that you're armed." " He is not armed." " Look at it!" "Oh!" "..." "We "was't" to know - "was" we?" "..." "It's Lavington!" "Never!" "That's Joey Wetherley!" "Gertie got him to impersonate Lavington after the real Lavington was killed in Holland." "Wetherley!" "Shh!" "Hey, Joey!" "I've just found one of your relations." "You're not go to get away, you know, Joey?" "Come on, Gertie." "You better give yourself up!" "You're really in bad company, here." "They're here somewhere, Poirot." "It is a waiting, I think, mon ami." "Not my way of doing things." "I am going to have everyone of these dust covers off." "Well, the museum will not be delighted, I think." "I don't care about that." "Benson!" "Tidmarsh!" "They're here!" " Joey!" " Go on!" " All right, Joey, come quietly." " Give yourself up, Wetherley." "Not in your life, Mr. Japp!" "Come on, Gertie." "Hand them over." "Sit here, Hastings." "Now, I hope that you will not again wound my feelings by saying that I am unknown to the the criminal classes." "Oh!" "I didn't mean that, exactly..." "Parfois, they even employ me, themselves, when they do not know which way to turn." " What do you think?" " Well..." "I think that we have made a good choice, Hastings." " Not bad, eh?" " Poirot!" "Hastings!" "I thought she'd never stop talking." " What do you think?" " That's a beauty." " I thought you're gonna get a small one." " I'd feel silly with a small one." "Are you going to try it out now?" "Captain Hastings has not brought it here for the good of his health." "Did you ever think to go in the sea, Poirot?" "Non, non, my friend." "This is as close as I like to get." "I used to dream about the sea." "Translated, resync and corrected by titta"