"Grrr!" "Agh!" "Ohh!" "We've never faced an enemy so powerful." "Looks like we've finally met our match." "We should never have doubted the awesome skills and power of..." "Dave the Intern?" "(Laughs)" "And now my wrath shall rain down upon you like... um..." "like rain!" "But painful rain!" "Like when you're not expecting it and then bam!" "Rain!" "Now prepare to meet your doom!" "Ohh!" "(Growling)" "Aargh!" "Agh!" "Please, Dave, I'm begging you for mercy." "I have no mercy." "I work in the fast food industry." "(Laughs)" "(Woman) David, what are you doing down there?" "Nothing, Mother." "Are you gonna play with your dollies all day or are you gonna go out and try to be a villain?" "They're action figures." "And I am a villain, remember?" "I'm a founding member of the Lightning Bolt Society." "A bunch of losers!" "Why can't you be more like that Dr Eggman?" "He is such a wonderful horrible person." "I'm horrible too." "You don't know what I can do or what I'm gonna be." "You don't know." "I'm bad!" "I have bad things that you don't know about." "I'll be evil, you'll see!" "This may very well be our most devious scheme yet." "Yeah, when people try to pick up these coins we've glued down, they'll be terribly disappointed." "(All laugh)" "Dave, you want in on this sweet action?" "Sorry, but my mom says I can't hang out with you guys any more." "You're not a bad enough influence on me." "(Groans)" "Ooh, a quarter!" "Let me grab that before the owner comes back." "Evil schemes..." "dastardly plots..." "I've got it!" "I may not have super villain powers, but maybe I can replicate them." "Once I activate this freeze ray," "Sonic and his friends will be immobilised in ice forever." "(Laughs)" "(All sigh happily)" "Now, that's what I call a cool summer breeze." "(Sighs)" "With this magnifying glass" "I'll harness the power of the sun to fry those fools." "(Laughs)" "Cool!" "(Disco music)" "(Sighs)" "Minions of the jungle," "I command you to attack and destroy!" "(Squeaking)" "Yes!" "Nibble!" "Nibble with... vengeance... (Happy squeaking)" " (Groans) - (Clapping)" "Wow." "That's some A+ villainy you got there, kid." "Did you learn nothing as my intern?" "Step aside, son, and watch a master at work." "Feast your eyes on my brand spanking new electro-cage, a sure-fire way to capture Sonic and his dingus friends." "Ooh!" "Villainy!" "To be a super villain, you need super villain technology." "What do you have?" "A dinky cardboard helmet and an employee discount at Meh Burger?" "That's not true." "You don't get a discount unless you're management." "I'm sick of everyone saying I'm worthless." " Ohh!" " (Squeals)" "Aargh!" "Uh... what's going on?" "Where am I?" "(Heavy breathing)" "You're in my evil underground lair." "Looks like a finished basement." "I said it was underground, didn't I?" "You'll never get away with this." "I bet Orbot and Cubot are on their way to rescue me." "Do you get the feeling something's missing?" " I don't know." " Wait!" "I know." "My cup and ball toy." "Now I think about it, I'd better get comfy here." "Breaking news from the world of villainy." "Perennial powerhouse Dr Eggman is no longer the top villain in town." "We've received this shocking video from that loser who always gets my order wrong at Meh Burger." "Dr Eggman has been replaced by me, the newest King of Villainy, Dave the Intern." "No, wait." "Dave the In-vincible!" "Sonic, as your new arch-nemesis," "I challenge you to battle." "Cower in fear before me!" "(Mother) David!" "Come upstairs and try on your new pyjamas." "I got the ones with the race cars you like." "Mom!" "You're embarrassing me during my manifesto." "With me is Sonic the Hedgehog." "Sonic, what do you make of this?" "Well, to be frank, I'm happy to have Eggman out of the picture." "Ha!" "Hear that, Dave?" "Sonic's happy I can no longer attack him." "I win!" "Oh, wait, I'm in a cage." "As for Dave... honestly, he's never really been a threat." "Unless you consider serving under-cooked beef a threat." "(Both laugh)" "Food-borne illnesses are not to be laughed at." " But Dave the Intern is." " (Both laugh)" " (Laughs)" " Silence!" "I'll show Sonic not to laugh at me." "Oh, you get used to it." "All I need is a little muscle." "And I know just where to get it." "Don't even think about going to my lair and taking control of my evil technology." "I was just gonna join a gym and work on my biceps." "But stealing your technology is a way better plan." "(Laughs)" "Why did I disrespect Dave?" "Why?" "Vengeance shall be..." "Come on, you stupid thing, turn!" "Whoa!" "Vengeance shall be..." "Whoa!" "He seems to think vengeance shall be something." "I'm just not clear what." "This is really hard to watch." "Whoa!" " We got to stop that thing." " I'm on it." "Stay here and keep Dave from hurting himself and/or others." "I'm gonna heroically leave to get help." "(Grunting)" "Grrr!" "No wonder Sonic hates being captured." "This is unpleasant." "Next time I design a trap, I should include some amenities like magazines, a beverage dispenser, shuffleboard..." "Stuff to make the prisoner feel welcome and appreciated." "Eggman, Dave is running rampant with your Octopus-Bot." "He's not using the ink, is he?" "Those cartridges cost a fortune." "That's how they get you." "Can I rescue you first?" "Rescue me?" "I'm not getting rescued by my arch-nemesis." "My friends won't let me forget it." " What friends?" " I got friends!" "I don't need to prove anything to you." "Just let me break you out of here." "I can break myself out, thank you very much." " What's going on down there?" " Nothing, Mrs Dave's Mom." " You almost got us in trouble." " You started it." "Quit being a baby." "Let me rescue you." " I'm not a baby!" " Don't make me come down there." "Oh, no." "She's coming." "Fine, let me out." "The controller's over there." "Just don't tell anyone you rescued me." " Hey, guys, I rescued Eggman." " Oh, jeez!" "Come on!" "Whoa!" "So, Egghead, how do we shut this thing down?" "Like I'm gonna tell you how to shut down one of my robots." "Be careful!" "I just had him waxed." "Ha-ha!" "Yee-ha, I'm Billy the Echidna!" "Ouch!" "Right in the tentacles." "You got to tell us how to shut it down." "I don't got to tell you squat!" "Oh, come on!" "If you're gonna use the ink, at least hit the guy." "Oh, man, this is so gonna cost me." "Why don't you get the off-brand refill kit?" "Why don't I just flush my money down the toilet while I'm at it?" "Those things never work." "Fine, I'll help you shut it down." "There's a switch between the upper and lower beak." "Where's that?" "On the undercarriage, near the siphon." "It's basic Octopus anatomy." "You're not getting anywhere near my undercarriage." "Whoa!" "I'm finally gonna make Mom proud by destroying Sonic the Hedgehog." "I should capture this moment for posterity." "Whoa!" "Oh, he moved the mirrors and changed all my presets." "And the change cup is empty." "I know I had money in there." " (Woman) Get me out of here!" " Mother?" "David, are you responsible for destroying my house?" "(Sighs) Yes, Mother." "That's a terrible thing you did." "I am so proud of you!" "So I'm not a loser?" "No." "You're... a villain." "I think our work here is done." "Come on, gang." "Let's go home." "Hey!" "A quarter!" "Ugh!" "(All laugh)"