"I don't know whether it's a liability or an asset." "Because sometimes I feel like I'm three or four different people." "I want to paint a while, and it just burn within me just to paint, paint, paint, paint." "Then that cools off and then I wanna play my music, you know." "That cool off,I wanna write poetry." "I wanna do this, I wanna do something else." "Actually, I feel sometimes like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde." "I met this young lady in 1932... who was an undertaker's daughter." "So she invite me to see her father's undertaker shop." "Then she began to explain to me about all the different coffins... uh, half couch or full couch." "All that I didn't like anyway... because I wasn't interested in death nor dying." "So one night she came to a party where we were playing." "At that time my group was called the Four Keys." "And so she was a little tipsy, so she walked over to each member... and she walked over to Mr. Martin and she says..." ""I know who you are." "You are Duke Ellington. "" "And so she came to Bogan, the guitar player, says, uh..." ""You are Ted Lewis. "" "Then she sauntered over to me and she says..." ""You're Armstrong." "I know you're Armstrong." ""But you're not Louie Armstrong, that Louie." "You're just plain ol' Louie Bluie, that's what you are. "" "And so I used the name to record under later." "That'll get that rheumatism out of your old bones." " My fingers." " It's not your fingers, it's your mind." "You didn't miss anything on the table this morning with your fingers." "I know I didn't miss nothin', 'cause I didn't have nothin'after you got through with itl" "Hey, uh, Mr. Yank Rachell, how you like those goodies?" "I wouldn't let you play in my backyard." "Why you won't let me play in your backyard?" "'Cause I ain't gon' let you in my backyard." "What about Bogan here?" " Bogan can come in there." " He can come in?" "Yeah." "But you can't." "Oh, you don't think so much of me." "No." "Hey, Ted, when did you make this tune?" "You forgotten when you recorded this thing?" " No." " Well, what year?" " When did we record this old tune?" " It was right here in Chicago." " What year?" " 1934." "That was down at Merchandise Mart, wasn't it?" "The guy told us if we played any faster the thing would catch on fire." " You remember that?" " Yeah." "It's my greatest hope and fondest joy." "To talk about Mr. Bogan here..." "And how I brought him out of the land of the valley of the shadow." "But he's never been anything but a Casanova all ofhis life." "If I'm lyin', I hope something'big comes out of the woods and grabs me." "The dude..." "There wasn't a thing wrong with his look." "Women fell for the dude head over heels." "We used to call him Mr. Black Gable." "He had that smile, you know, and some chick bought him a gold crown." "And every opportunity he was showin' that piece of gold, you know." "Women fell over all kinds of ways about this dude." "He was so greedy after women..." "Just like a one-eyed cat watching'two rat holes." "Wasn't that right, Bogan?" "Tell me when you hear nothing, say nothing." "But really, this dude had a way with women." "That's why right today he's no good... as, uh, marriage material." "See what I mean?" "Women would just see him and wanna take him down..." "You married two, and they both divorced you." "Anyway, I had pretty nice handwriting'." "And when I met Ted, Ted saw..." "He couldn't believe all the curlicues and all the stuff I used to make." "He said, "Hey, man. " I said, "What is it, dude?"" "He says, "I want you to drop a few little scrawls to my women. "" ""Your women?" "What women?" "How many you got?"" ""Well, I just got two we gonna write to today. "" "I said, "Okay, uh, I'll write it. "" "And I put all..." "You shoulda seen what I wrote to this gal." " Shouldn't he, Ted?" " Yeah." "I wrote some beautiful letters." "And so I said, "Well... " I was getting ready to put 'em in an envelope." "I said, "Dude, I might as well"..." "I backed the envelope." "Sure did." "Put the right name on the envelope, didn't I?" "Only one catch..." "I put the wrong letter in the envelope." "I put one in one wrong and one in the other one wrong." "But to me that was a righteous deed." "What did the women say that got the letters, Ted?" "I haven't heard from 'em since." "They gave him the silent treatment!" "What you think they said?" " You enjoyed that, didn't you?" " Oh, that was the sweetest day of my life." "I'm enjoyin' what they call the golden years..." "'Cause I can function yet like a man." "I don't get in bed and go do some pretense." "I don't care if the woman is young, middle-aged or old." "Just like one time my girl she says, I forgot to ask you how old you are. "" "I said, How old I am?" I said, Hell, I didn't know you wanted agel" "But if you wanna know how old I am, by God, here's my birth certificate..." "Stickin'straight up where you can see itl"" "Nothin' wrong with your jaw bone nor the muscles of your mouth... 'cause you got a mouth like the Mammoth Caverns." "Thank you very much." " You know, the only thing wrong with you..." " What's that?" " You got too much mouth." " Thank you, sir." "Did you hear what he said?" "You couldn't hear 'cause you're chewing'too loud." "I'll tell you somethin' if you wanna hear somethin'." "Huh?" "What's that?" "If I had one biscuit and you hadn't eaten nothin' in a month..." "I'd break it in two and eat both pieces." "I believe ya." "And he tell the truth about that, isn't he, Ted?" " Yeah, I reckon so." " Good as I been to him." "I brought him up here and introduced him to the best woman you ever saw." "The best gal..." "You know who she was." "He married her, and then he regretted it." "How many kids did y'all have, Yank?" "Never had one." "Never could have one, no." " Well, your wife had a bunch of'em." " Well, that was her." "You'll have to ask her." "You're taking care of somebody else's then." " We all do thatl" " You, maybe." "Now, wait a minute." "What is that?" "Pants?" "That's what they are." "You always did like a lot of color." "I've seen clowns in circuses wouldn't wear that crap you got." "You could play checkers on that damn suit you got there." "You know, when I knew you you wore kind of conservative clothes." "Now you just wear anything you can get, don't you?" "That's the shirt I want..." "that orange one with the green stripe in it." "See, you oughta give me that one..." "On account of I let you have your first pair of store-bought shoes that you ever wore." "What?" "You give it to me?" "If you can give me $5.00 for that." "Okay." "Put that on account, on account of that I haveth no money." "You done quit drinkin'now, haven't ya?" "You used to drink sweat off a grape." "Anything, you know." "But that's... that's "used to. "" "No, I liked you a whole lot better when..." "You know..." "You see, I liked you when you were a drunkard... because you were an honest drunkard." "But now you are a hypocrite and a big liar." "You stopped drinking'." "You were honest when you were drinkin'." "I cannot relate to you the way you are, man." "Can't even play my good, old-time, low-down, funky blues anymore." "I seen the time if I asked you for this ol'jive shirt..." "You'd say, Here, take it, Louie Bluie." "Take it and go. "" " I told you to take it and go." " Oh, you did?" " Yeah." " You know, I'm gon'tell you somethin'." " You the best fella ever I saw in the world." " You see that?" "I'll tell you some more good ones..." "Hey, look." "You see this picture here?" "Yeah." "That's the old blast furnace." "All this I drew from memory." " Didn't have photographs and things." " Yeah." " That's what we used to do on our..." " Who are they?" "They were wash women." "You just go out to a tree and wash." "And this is me when I used to lead a blind man around and pick up nickels and dimes... and pennies for him." "And this is the guy they called Cheese." "Used to play piano." "From Birmingham, Alabama." "This was Old Lady Satterfield, the village mother, you know." "She was over 100 years old." "That's the old hearse." "And this is the house where I used to live." "I been exposed to music all my life." "The town that I grew up in is called LaFollette, Tennessee." "There were 11 of us in the family." "All those older than me could play some instrument." "So I started off playing music by listening to my dad." "He gave me some instructions on the mandolin and whatnot..." "Because after he got into the preaching business..." "They decided... he and his church members..." "that that was the devil's instrument..." "And it wasn't becoming for a minister to play string music." "So he threw his old mandolin in my lap." "See, this is a picture I know you'll recognize..." "old photograph." " Sure." " We used to play in all 'em hedges and highways." "Street corners and everywhere." "Country fairs." "And, you know, during that time there was a whole lot of black fiddlers... who could really play." "But they couldn't get in to compete with the white fiddle players." "Never could." "They never let me get in on a fiddler's contest." "There were guys in there fiddling' and scraping'." "Couldn't play a damn 'nough music to keep the flies off a dog's dick." "Many people didn't know, especially those in the cities..." "That black people, you know, black musicians, string bands, whatnot... played country music too." "We used to play hoedowns and all that sort of music..." "Like Ida Red, " "John Henry" and Cacklin'Hen. "" "But that's really a hard number to do." "Chorus!" "I ain't seen you in ages." "Well, it's good to be back, but anyway it's kinda like walking in a dream." "My brother Roland was playing..." "In a band I was playing in in Knoxville... so we had a little engagement at that radio station, WROL." "Everybody all up and down the strip had their little sets turned on..." "'Cause they know we were gonna come over big, you know." "And all I used to do, Ed, just take a piece of music and run it down... and then I had it, you know, and I had that." " Yeah, you could play any kind of mu..." "Anything." " Yeah." "And I had it on until the man announced the band." "He says, "Now, ladies and gentlemen, our feature for the evening..." ""is, uh, Tennessee Chocolate Drops." ""And they're gonna play as their first selection..." "'I Miss a Little Miss Who Misses Me in Sunny Tennessee. "'" "My mind went just as blank as the Red Sea." "So, I didn't know how to start it." "Sometimes you played intro back then, you know." "And I "fiddle-dee-deed. " I fiddled all the way from "C" to E-flat." "My brother Roland chewed tobacco..." "he played the bass... and he leaned over and tried to whistle the song so I would get the start... and got strangled on his tobacco and started coughing." "It tickled me." "And it came to me." "And then we picked up the song." "So the next day all the cats on the street said, "Man, you guys really were cooking last night." "But lookee here, that was the craziest intro ever I heard. "" "I said, "You don't know how near you came to not even gettin' a song. "" "That's when we used to play up on Vine Street." "Used to be another blind guy played over there at the boarding house." "That was a guy I left here with." "Mm-hmm." "He had a great big bass violin." " His brother Carl played the bass fiddle." " Boy, they made good..." "I didn't know you knew that old boarding house was over there." "Well, I been here 66 years!" "What you talkin' about?" " Watch yourself now." "It's all right." " I'm proud of it!" "Well, the first string bands that I, uh, came in contact with..." "Were just local bands in the hills around LaFollette." "They were made up of fellas who even worked in the mine, dug coal, worked at the blast furnace." "Most of the string bands composed of just whatever came to hand." "They had mandolin, fiddles, guitar." "Once in a while you would see a sax..." "But they didn't figure that they belonged in a string band." "Black musicians played so many things... stovepipe, cue sticks, broom handles, jugs..." "I mean, could really blow at y'all." "I organized a little string band." "I played the fiddle..." "And my brother Roland played a homemade bass my dad made out of a goods box." "My brother L. C. Played the guitar..." "And F. L., the baby boy, six years old..." "He played the banjolele or ukulele." "My band played all the same kinds of jobs as other black string bands did in those days." "We would play for outings, picnics, fish fries." "Our biggest plays were done for the elite of..." "White people, you know." "The upper crust, as we used to say." "The elite white people." "We would play for those banquets and all those different things." "Maybe they would have a political campaign." "They would hire us to go out, play on excursions and things like that." "We couldn't play the blues, you know, for the white people." "We learned how to play the pop songs, you know..." "Like, um, Brown Eyes, Why You Blue?"" "If you came out there playing some low-down blues..." "They'd pack up and leave, or either you'd have to pack up and run... because they'd put some heat on you that you couldn't stand." "This is my sister-in-law." "I don't care how many times she been married." "She's still my sister-in-law." "The feeling hasn't changed." "She was married to my brother, Reverend Roland Armstrong." "You know, your brother was a good musician, Willie Osmond." " Yes, he was." " Arthur was a good musician." "And your dad, you know, he played everything, nearly, Mr. Osmond." "Yes, he did." "And my dad..." "You know, Rev. Armstrong, he used to play..." "As a matter of fact, he taught me how to play on an old tater-bug mandolin." "He also taught me the ukulele." "But I didn't know that your sister Mary could play all that much music." "Yesterday, when we came by..." "She seemed to be very, very shy." " But she really can set that thing on fire." " She sure can." "So they said we'll have a recitation... by Marvin McDowell." ""Grosner beats the little sandpiper"..." "That's enough of that, you know." "So the teacher, after about three, got up there and said..." ""The next one says anything about that doggoned sandpiper..." "I'm gonna take him to the cloak room. "" "But the sad part, you see, my poor ol' mother was sittin' back there... and some other parents... and that old chicken-eating preacher they called Rev. Parks, I didn't like him very well." "So after they'd recited the thing about three times... well, they called on me." ""We gonna have a recitation by Master William Howard Armstrong. "" " You know what I mean?" " Yes." "Uh-huh." "That was me!" "Mama just looked back and smiled so pretty, you know." "Say, "You tell 'em, tiger!"" "And all the kids were very happy 'cause they knew they were gonna hear somethin'..." "Unusual, at least different, you know." "I got out with my little Boy Scout shoes on, you know..." "And got the right stance, just like I was Abraham Lincoln, you know... and I even addressed 'em." ""Faculty, student body and friends," I says, "I'm gonna talk about a bird..." ""but it's a different bird;" "it's not gonna be a sandpiper." "One that you're all familiar with. "" "Mama nodded." ""You tell 'em, son. "" "I reared back, and that old woman was just beaming' with pride." "I said..." ""The woodpecker flew to the schoolhouse yard." "He wanted to peck because his pecker was hard. "" ""The woodpecker flew to the schoolhouse door." "He pecked so long till his pecker got sore. "" "Then they were gettin' up." "I saw 'em gettin' up." ""The woodpecker, he pecked all night till the break of day." "When the sun rose up he flew away. "" "And 'bout that time they had me by the ear, by the feet." "Even old man Parks had me." "They upped and liked to beat all the hide off me." "That was my last time, I think, appearing on..." "On... in school." "Oh, my goodness." "What are you..." "What you laughin' 'bout?" "You forgot that, girl?" "Now, here's somethin' that you got that used to be common, you know." "This little ol' hen here?" "I guess you don't know where the salt shakers went." "That was the old hen." "We've had that for many a year." "That belonged to my wife." " Really?" " Yeah." "These were all her things here." " Well, look..." " I don't remember you." "No, well, I..." "I lived on..." "I lived on Seventh Street years ago." "And the houses were so close together you could piss out one window... and puke out the other." "The first screen doors and things that I saw..." "I thought they were put up there to keep the flies in the house... not out of the house." "And if Mama's favorite preacher was there eatin'up my daddy's good fried chicken..." "I fanned the flies and they would give me the wing." "See, that was awful fine, eatin', you know, the chicken wing." "But that old preacher..." "ol' Reverend Parks..." "Mama had the chicken cut up so it would look like a whole lot of chicken, you know." "And they started in on the tender parts, you know, like the breast, you see." "And that melted in his mouth." "Then they got down to the drumsticks and he just drank those, almost." "But when he got round..." "And he just indiscriminately he stuck his fork in... whatever part of the chicken was close to him... and he happened to stick the fork in one of my wings." "Man, I fell on the table." "Cried, screamed like a wildcat." "Mama had to drag me to the woodshed and lambasted me." "Well, look at this dude." "He done ate up all the chicken." "He got one piece... and he's gon' save that for his supper tonight." " How much did he start with?" " I don't know." "I think he had..." "Look!" "There's a whole thing and it's empty." "A whole, big thing." "He just like the old woman that save her supper for her breakfast... and died before morning." "Well, chicken ain't nothin' but a bird, you know." "You sure love it, don't you?" "You have a love affair with a piece of chicken." "Chicken ain't nothin' but a bird." "But there's one thing I can say about that bird, Mr. Rachell." "He hadn't long to live when you get your grippers on him." "You sink your 32-20s in him, he won't live long." " Ain't no way." " I done told the truth." "32-20s"?" "You know, them big graveyard toothpicks they got up there." "He love the Colonel 'bout as well as you love McDonald's." "There were different ethnic groups here in this part of Tennessee where I was..." "And they had, of course, Jim Crow, the discriminatory practices and whatnot." "We weren't supposed to cross over the line, but bein'little ol'kids and things, we did." "I played with the little Italians, the little Hungarians..." "The little Polish kids, you know." "Well, I was speakin'better Italian, grammatically, than I was English." "And so, when I first came to Chicago in the '30s..." "It served me in good stead." "Mine was the only black group that could go among these different ethnic groups..." "Because I could make out and speak in the language..." "And also playin'the type of music most of'em liked." "How you like that, Brother Rachell?" "Well, it'll do, but I have seen better." "I've seen better"?" "You act like you haven't heard anythingl" "No, I didn't." "Neither heared or see'd it." "We start pulling doors right after we got here." "Pullin'doors was like, uh, three or four guys just to get together." "Didn't matter what the instrumentation was." "And, uh, we had no particular place to play." "You know, didn't have any gig, that is." "And we..." "I said, "Well, look, man." "I'm gonna pull the door, the first door. "" "You don't know whether you're gonna get a cuspidor thrown in your face or thrown out... or maybe invited in." "And we ran on a little Italian place they call La Casita." "And I didn't know that they were angry becauseJoe Louis beat this big fighter..." "They call Primo Canero." "And I walked in front with my violin..." "And the little place was hazy with these little stogies"they'd call 'em... little Italian cigars, you know." "The smoke was everywhere." "Just blue in there." "The atmosphere was really..." "really hostile." "I tried to back out, and I backed up on the guitar player." "He backed up on the washboard player." "And he backed up on the bass fiddle player who blocked the door." "So something told me..." "I don't know, the devil might have stuck his tail in my ear..." "He said, "Talk Italian. "" "And I started rattling off my Tennessee Italian... and so right away the whole atmosphere changed." "And I told 'em I could play Italian music." "And he says..." "Presto!" "Play right away." "And we almost tore the lid off that old raggedy fiddle case I had... tryin' to get it out fast enough." "Then after we had gotten full on that good old dago red and whatnot..." "That they was servin'us, the boys got a little tipsy." "And, uh, we were playing one particular song they call Oh, Marie"..." "And, uh, some of the guys thought they were really singing Italian... and they were sayin', "Oh, my leg," "Oh" anything, you know." "Italians say, "Oh, you boys sing good Italian," you know?" "Some of the guys were singing..." ""Oh, my leg," and "Oh" whatever... anything." "Anything they could think of, they'd say." " Yeah." " And that's what got us out of that little scrap." "And every time... "Where you dudes goin' on Monday, man?"" ""We goin' out, play for 'em in Italian. " "Uh-uh." "Not me. "" "And we played over here at that place." "What was that pretty song that you told me?" "I don't know it so well, but you said..." " The one you..." " Oh, that... that..." "Oh!" " "My Four Reasons"?" " Yeah, "My Four Reasons. "" " Oh, yeah, I wrote that in jail, man." " Did you write it in jail?" " Yeah." " What were you in jail for?" " Well, you see, that's gettin' a little personal." " Oh, excuse me." "I thought it was the time that you found a rope in the street... and the reason they put you in jail..." "they didn't put you in jail for the rope..." "He had a pig on the other end of the rope." " Is that right?" " All right now." " Well, anyway..." " You want me to play a little..." " so you can see what this is?" " Yeah, play a little bit for us now." "Pick up on it, Tommy." "Go on." "I don't care." "I'd hate to wake up anywhere and see that." "You know, at nighttime, daytime, summertime, winter... any other time." "See, I'm a realist." "If you're gonna be an artist, paint something that looks like something..." "At least you can relate to." "That, I don't know." "It's just like something that jumped out of The Twilight Zone." "That's the way I feel about it." "Whole lot of money, a big bunch of bullshit went down the drain, you know what I mean?" "You could pick that up most anywhere." "You know, it may not be quite as big as that." "Just put it right together and pile it on deep." "I don't think the people who got it... they know what the hell they were doing in the first place." "Crayola crayon..." "You know..." "And then I took it home and painted it." "How did you come to be an artist?" "Well, that's a pretty long story." "I'll tell you a little bit." "See, I was raised down in Tennessee." "And, um, there was a big family of us." "My dad was a painter, but he had to work hard, see?" "And so I used to..." "I didn't even have paint to use." "I would go out and get pokeberry ink to make my red." "Steal my mother's blue ink to make blue." "And get walnut stain to make yellow, you know what I mean?" " And you know what else I did?" " What?" "To get my brushes, I pulled the hairs out of a cat's tail... and jammed... put 'em in a quill." "You know?" "Goose quill." "And made me a brush." "There wasn't a cat in that neighborhood liked me." "Then the first time that I saw it rain..." "On some crepe paper, it solved my problem." "I saw that there dye running out of the paper, you know what I mean?" "All colors, you know?" "And then I got me some scraps of crepe paper, squeezed it out in a ball..." "Then I had me some nice ink to paint with." "And the first Christmas that I got a set of watercolors... a whole, brand-new set... four colors..." "I slept with them." "Ofttimes, people would see me paint, hear me play or something like that..." "And sometime they would say, Oh, you're not all black." "You must be mixed with something. "" "Aw, gee." "And my wife says, Yes." "I can tell you what." "To be exact, he's a half-breed." "He's halfblack and half jackass. "" "And so that was awful bad on me." "I didn't like that." "If I'd have been a wife-beatin'man..." "I would've gone right upside her head..." "Put five of clubs on her and trumped her little act." "They're twin brothers." "Usually one half is in jail most of the time." "I'm a heathen." "Shit." "I can give my money to a whore..." "We can give it to a damn preacher." "What do I give a damn for?" "Preacher's a regular legalized pimp." "Start talking about hell and damnation lookin'right dead in a sister's drawers." "A lot of people didn't care too much aboutJesus 'cause he was too humble and meek." "Who in the fuck cares about somebody who's nodding'his damn head..." "When a guy's gettin'ready to kick his ass?" "Ike, I want to show you something..." "some of my artwork, you know." " Yeah." " This is something." "I'm sure you've never seen anything like it before." " See?" "Special book, you know..." " Yeah." "That I drew myself, wrote and everything." " It's called A Whorehouse Bible." " It is?" " You take a look through that." " Ooh, yeah." "And if you see anything that make your ears wiggle, you know." "Yeah." "You can open it up and see what it's like, you see." "All like that." " More truth in porn, see?" " Yeah, I see." "Actually this is called the ABC's of Pornography." "Each letter tells about some particular act, you know, what it stands for." "It's not about intercourse all the time." "But I think there's a little knowledge that can be gained..." "If you read the book all the way through." "About different things that we don't ordinarily hear about." "You see, a lot of people think that pornography..." "Is something vicious or ugly and all like that." "But it is a basic part of our life, believe it or not." "Yeah, I imagine that." "You got a lot of writing." " Huh?" " A lot of history and writing." "Well, a lot of it was done sporadically, you know." "I took a little over a year, I think." "I even got some things in here about Cleopatra and the Queen of Sheba." "Well, what is it he's cookin'?" "Sure." "But you see who's coming in the door, don't you?" "Jody." "See, he got it open..." "a chitlin pot, you know." " Well, he's been up here..." " And the woman's husband's coming in." " Oh, my goodness." " Of course, you know what happened, don't you?" " Yeah." "I got an idea." " He was a candidate for an early funeral." " See that woman sticking' out so far behind?" " Yeah." "Well, anyway, that's what we call steatopygic." "And that means that you have a lot of fat in your gluteus maximus." " You know, your buttocks, you see." " Uh-huh." "Many women in this country, especially of African origin..." "Have a lot of fat behind, you know?" "Some of them stick out so damn far... you can put a saddle on 'em and ride, you know." "This guy told me..." "said a certain part ofhis anatomy..." "When he looked at one of those women sticking' out... got harder than a Chinese arithmetic problem." "Man, turn that page." "Boy, I guess." "This is some book." "Why, sure it's some book." "It's a special book, see?" "Make a weak-minded fool go stone crazy." "That's all there is to it, see?" "Now there's the man Death." "He's the biggest pimp of all." "That's Death." "I don't care how good you feel or what you're feeling for." "When he says, "checkmate," my man, it's all over." "Did you use models for this?" " Uh, yes." "Mental..." "Mental models." " Mental models." "Oh, my God!" "This was in a J ET magazine about this black woman... born with two vaginas, man." " You didn't know that?" " No, I didn't catch that." "She had five kids..." "three out of one and two out of the other." "Really." "But what I can't understand... how the heck did they keep score on which one she had the babies out of?" " That's..." "That is something." "That's something." " Now that's what got me." "That's right." "No wonder you keep this book locked up." "Well, I have to keep it locked up to keep the man from locking me up." "Do it." "Right on!" "Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen." "Thank you very much." " I'm an old record collector." " Oh, yeah." "Uh-huh." "And I've got a record here... an old 78 R.P.M. You made about 40 or 50 years ago." " Who did?" " You did." "That must've been my daddy made that." "Maybe." "But I could've sworn it was your fiddle I heard just a second ago." "You have any idea how rare that is now?" "Oh, yes." "I know it is because we never did even get to see the record." "The guy who bought us a hamburger..." "man, he flew the coop." "He did the Houdini." " You played the fiddle on this back then." " Sure did." "I played the fiddle on there." "And I also played the mandolin too." " "Vine Street Rag. "" " Okay." " Yeah." " What you want me to sign?" " Didn't even put my name on it, did they?" " I know it." "That's not much credit." " What is your name now?" " Ron Brown." " R" " O-N B-R-O-W-N?" " That's correct." " I wish I could write..." " I can't believe that." " Ain't that something?" " You got the finest cursive I've ever seen." "This guy's an artist, man." "You oughta see some ofhis painting." " Do you play any B.B. King music?" " Uh, well, I don't..." "Now that's..." "Now listen." "I'm glad you phrased it like that." "Ofttimes when we'll be playing in clubs and places, some white will come up..." ""Hey, man." "Can you play B.B. King?"" "I say, "Yeah, if you put some strings on him, tune him up and give me a fiddle bow." "I'll play the hell out of him, you know. "" "I just play my own thing, you know what I mean." " Yeah." " It's a heterogeneous thing." "I played here when we didn't have electric guitars and fiddles." "We used to play on the corner, man." "We had a dude you call Washboard Sam." "Another guy played a guitar." "I played my fiddle." "And we'd come over here and set up shop." "The guys that you know along back then like Bumble Bee Slim..." "Tampa Red, Memphis Minnie." "And, man, we passed a hat." "We got all kinds of chips." "Hey, my man." "Wanna check it out, see what we got for you." " How you doin'?" "Got your sunglasses, earrings." " Everything's cool." " Yeah, man." " Posters." "Well, I wanna see what you got in here." "Check out some of these new-wave sunglasses." "Come from that new-wave music... that punk rock." "Toys for the mind." " How much are those smaller posters up there?" " Those are two dollars." "The large is three." " You got the one with the butterfly on it?" " Think we should have it." " Is this the right one, Howard?" " Yeah, that's the right one, man." " Turn it up the other way, right?" " A dragon." "Yeah, I'm gonna put that right over my bed, man." " And I got a black light." " Black light?" "Okay." "You put that on, then that child will jump right at you, man." " Right." "Right." "Look like it's right before you." " Yeah." "Oh, hell, yeah." "Well, I wanna wish you success." "Look, you know what old-time people used to say?" "I'm just as proud to see you if I'd found a strand of hair in my bread." " I'm really glad to meet you." " Glad to meet you too." " See ya, man." " You have a good day now." " Will do." " Who's next with the paper?" "You next?" "What do you say, bro?" " Who them with ya?" " I don't know." "I'm just looking." " Do you wanna buy something?" " Well, how do I know if I don't look?" "Is there harm in looking, or is there a price?" "Is there a price on looking?" "What's that in that brown bottle?" "Where you put it?" "Under your arms, or between your toes, or where?" "When I was up in West Virginia, Martin and I, we joined this black man." "And I knew he was black as I was." "But he said he was a Hindu." "Then he call himself Leon Debondara..." "And he made snake oil, and he had..." "They call 'em trailers and campers now, but we called them house cars back then." "We hit the road." "There's one thing I must give the man." "He had the gift of gab." "He could make you see where fat meat wasn't greasy almost." "'Cause when he..." "When he brought out his medicine and things... the bottle was worth more than what was in the bottle." " Smells pretty good." " Does it?" "And that's a dollar, huh?" "It was really a quackery." "He would look over the audience..." "used to be mostly men in the crowd." ""What's wrong with you?" ""It's your kidneys." ""Poison has pervaded, or invaded your whole system." ""And not only..." "That's just the beginning." ""When your heart is palpitating..." ""you got bags under your eyes..." ""That's just part of what I want to tell you about." ""I'm not gonna point you out." ""But some of you men out there..." "you're not functioning as a man." ""Oh, I'm not gonna call you a name." "You know who it is that, uh..." ""When's the last time your wife came to your bedroom?" "Don't tell me, 'cause you don't have to." "I know. "" "He says, "But I guarantee you..." ""if you take just one bottle of this..." ""wonderful medicine for three days..." ""she'll be breaking the door... you'll have to get a new door, that's all there is to it..." ""'cause she'll break the door down to get into there." "You'll be performing like you should as a man. "" "If it was a pretty prosperous medicine show..." "They would get fellas to play music." "That's where we came in." "I was playing a banjo-mandolin." "And I was really plunking the thing, and Martin was singing." "And not only could Martin sing and pick his guitar, he could dance too." "And he knew how to do buck and wing. "" "Tap-dancing wasn't as well known as it is today." "But it wasn't nothin'but just come from old buck dancing', you know?" "They ain't no sound like the old days, 'cause they ain't got that spirit in them." "They ain't got that kind of stuff in 'em to play that sound." "This man..." "This man here..." "This man is doing something that when he plays and sings the blues with that mandolin..." "If you've been down in my part of the country..." "And sleep of mornings and hear a guy going to work... in a deck of overalls and a overall jacket... with creases in the pants..." "And he's on his way to work and hear him strumming on a mandolin and singing the blues... or a guitar and singing the blues, then you've had it." "You don't hear that now." "Chicago's Westend Nightclub..." "Welcomes back Howard Armstrong, Banjo"Ikey Robinson..." "Tom Armstrong, Yank Rachell..." "And Mr. Ted Bogan." "This is the last tune, ladies and gentlemen." "Mr. Bogan won't mean for you to drag your feet or drag your hand." "Get it, take it and get." "Get with it." ""Divin' Duck Blues. "" "It's a song I made in 1929." "You mean, uh, A.D. Or B.C.?" "Which?" "In 1929, I'm 30 years old... 35 however." " Soon you'll be old as Jack Benny, won't you?" " I'm trying to tell you." "Blues is more than that." " Blues has been a way of life..." " From way back in the fields of the cotton." "Absolutely." "Absolutely." "Because I remember back in Tennessee..." "I would go to one of these old Saturday night catfish fries, you know?" "And we'd be just whamming away." "We'd be laying it down, man." "The atmosphere was really getting ripe." " You know what I mean?" " Yeah." "Whole lot of cats... they didn't know what soap and water was nohow, man." " And the place was catfish..." " We didn't care what it was." "Well, you know all them chitlins and catfish goin' on, man." "It was hell in there, you know what I mean?" "And I start some more old-down funky blues on the upbeat, you know." "And them chicks got to wiggling their bellies and their rear end." "'Aw, do it, baby." "Throw it in Tug River, man"... that's all." "I got down on my knees and start crawling cross the floor, playin'my fiddle." "And then got so smart, I put it behind my head and started playing my thing." "I'm tellin' you, man." "That's real blues." "Uh-huh." "That's real..." "That's real..." "That's history, man." "Well, that's our history anyway." "You always were a grouch." "He put that nickel in." "That mean Armstrong put up first." "Hey." "Shit." "But my dollar..." "Put something else up there..." " I'll wait him out." " He putting' in." "That's a friend." " He's a friend." "He's a friend." " Don't fall out, y'all." "Kill a man over a nickel." " I know people got killed over two cents." " I know of a man got killed over a nickel." "But he was reachin' in the pot takin' money." "I know a man got killed the other day over nothin'at his own place." " A man come in there and shot him." " Mm-hmm." " Shot him?" " Somebody got killed up in there near me." "Up there on 71 st and something." "Man and woman... somebody come in there and kill the both of'em." " Oh, no, you don't." " Top card." "Top card." "Well, put it over here." "What you takin' it back for?" " Gimme that money." "Shit." " You got two pair." "Sure I have." "Then fold." "Give me a dime." " Now you put all this back now." " Yeah, and some more." " Man, you're already in there." " I'm already up." "Now, let me know when you're through scrambling' over the money." "See, this is an old-time, slave-time tale, you understand, all right..." "Told in poetical form, see." "Now, Jack met the devil with a pot on his back..." ""A-tippin' through the morning dew." ""He say, 'I'm lookin' for a nigger that's long and black..." ""'case I craves a nigger stew." "I love lean meat." "Don't like 'em fat." "Lean meat's tasty and sweet." "You see, I go for a heap of that." "When I find this nigger, jack, I'll have a feast." "The white folks say he's a lazy coon who likes to kick up his heel." "He possum hunts by the light of the moon..." "And fucks the wenches when the men's in the field. '" ""Jack knowed the devil couldn't see too well..." "But his nose got a great big whiff.." ""Of that great big funky pussy smell." ""So the devil say, 'Boy, you smell just right'..." ""and he begin to grin." "But in a second, Jack was out of sight, running just like the wind. "" " Who made what?" " That pussy." "No, the book." "Who made the book?" "I ain't talkin' about the book." "I'm talkin' about the pussy." "That's what I'm interested in." "I ain't interested in no book." " What kind of answer do you want for that?" " Well, I can't do nothin' with a book." "I tell ya, I belong to the church now and everything." "I belong to a church too." "Well, if you belong to church, you oughta know a lot about it." " The preacher's usually the biggest..." " I know the man who in the church preaching'." "Woman shed all her clothes and the preacher said, Don't peek. "" "Said, "Do, you'll go blind. "" "I said, "Well, I ain't gonna peek, Reverend, but damned if ain't gonna risk one eye. "" "He looked like hell." "I'm not ashamed to tell anybody my age." "I'm 75 years..." "not old, but 75 years young." "Because I have most of the attributes that young men should have." "I have interest in life." "And full of energy, full of pep." "Most of all, I'm full of curiosity..." "Because that is one thing that keeps you young." "I'm doing with my life every morning that I get up." "That is my life." "And whatever activity for the day I want to get in..." "That's what I get into." "I don't know what the heck is coming." "I guess I must be gonna wind up in The Twilight Zone."