"I don't want to go someplace else." "My home is here." "I live in this jungle." "I've already lost my father." "I don't want to..." "I don't want to lose my home, too." "Ah!" "Timeout, Dad, timeout." "Well, give up?" "Not a chance." "Exactly." "You haven't got a chance." "Oh, yeah?" "Try it again, and I'll knock your spots off!" "Listen to you." "If talk were a left hook, you'd be king of the jungle." "Just like his father, a smooth talker." "Aw, honey, don't get the wrong idea." "We were just, um..." "Hmm, well..." " He was just talking..." " Huh?" "about how pretty your eyes get when you're mad at him." "I was?" "Oh, yeah, I was." "Don't play dumb." "You both deserve a smack on the bum." "Wow, you're a poet, Mom." "Very funny." "You, be quiet." "And, you, stop fighting." "Are you trying to turn my son into Rambo overnight?" "Honey, he needs to learn self-defense, doesn't he?" "I'm making him a man." "Exactly." "He's not a man." "He's a cub." "Mom, please, chill." "Don't tell me to chill." "What if you got hurt?" "You two have no idea..." "No idea how a mother feels." "Fine, go ahead and joke, but don't come crying to me." "Hmm!" "Uh-oh, I've got a feeling you're gonna be sleeping outside the cave tonight, Dad." "Don't worry, Yuvi." "I know a secret way of getting back on her good side." " How?" " With a song." "Sultan!" "Yuvi!" "Go." "Sultan!" "Oh, No!" "Yuvi!" "Papa?" "Yuvi!" "If Papa was here and it was one of us who had gotten killed, do you think he would have said we should all run away?" "The rest of us aren't like him, Yuvi." "We're not as strong as your father was." "But he always said it was all of you who made him brave and strong." "It was all 'cause of you." "Very nice of him to say, I'm sure, but today he got shot." "Tomorrow, it might be one of us." "Besides, what's the difference if we stay or go somewhere else?" "I mean, let's be honest, if you've seen one jungle, you've seen them all." "We should go." "You call yourselves wild animals?" "Bunch of cowards!" "Our king's dead, so what?" "Our army's still intact." "So what are we gonna do, let the humans drive us from our home, or splatter their guts all over the jungle?" "My men are just waiting for me to give the word." "One minute syllable." "War!" " War!" " War!" "War!" " War!" " War!" "War!" "Aw, shut up." "What's your problem, chimpo?" "Always with the war and the violence." "Man, chill." "I know it's a hard concept, but fighting's not the answer to everything." "Yeah, you're right." "We should just walk up to the guy tomorrow and say," ""Good morning, boss." ""Oh, by the way, it'd be so cool if you stop killing us and took your bulldozers away,"" "and he'll say, "Sorry, Fuzzy, I had no idea." ""No problem." "We'll pack up and leave right away." ""You want a cup of coffee?"" "You don't get it." "I know all about humans." "They shoot each other every day of the week." "Think they'll lose any sleep over shooting you?" "Ka-bang!" "Bang!" "Hey, listen, chimpo." "They can't all be like that." "There must be some who prefer a more civilized approach." "You know, like a talk, chit-chat, uh, sharing gardening tips." "All right, let's pretend for a second that they're willing to listen." "How the heck are you gonna talk to them?" "Does anyone here know how to speak their language?" "Anyone?" "!" " I know somebody!" " You do?" "What?" "Who?" "Wait, what was I saying?" "Aw, don't listen to that feather brain." "Right, right, wait, I think I've got it." "I know just the somebody you're looking for." "He not only speaks animal, he speaks human like a native." "Who?" "His name..." "His name?" "His name is..." "Hold on." "What was his name?" "I know I wrote it down somewhere." "Ah, "Call Mother."" "Uh... "Laundry."" "No, no, no, no, no." "What's in a name anyway?" "Knock it off!" "Sorry, sorry, sorry." "Think this is some kind of a joke?" "It's serious, you idiot." "Talking won't work." "We have to make war!" "Enough!" "Be quiet, Bajrangi." "No more talk of fighting." "It's over." "We've already decided." "In two days, we're leaving the jungle." "Ah." "Time to go, dear." "Ohh..." "Uh, Pigeon?" "What?" "Huh?" "The one who can talk to humans, where does he live?" "What?" "Who are you?" "Oh, Pigeon, it's me." "It's Yuvi." "Huh?" "Hmm... who are you?" "Yuvi." "Ha, so it is." "You should be getting back." "Hurry up, now." "We all must go." "I must go." "I know, but go where?" "Go where?" "Well, I..." "Mmm, hmm!" "Good question." "Uh, my home is..." "Right here." "Yes, it is." "His name is Alex." "He's the pet parrot of a big film director." "He couldn't fly across a room to save his life, but talk about multilingual..." "Hindi, English, German, French, Klingon... and those are just the ones I remember." "And by the way, why do you want to know?" "I think I have a plan." "Your temper is your enemy, seriously." "All this anger's gonna give you an ulcer, I'm telling you." "Loosen up, stop and smell the bananas, or make a smoothie." "You'll live longer, you loveable hothead little monkey." "Next time you feel like you're about to flip out, just stop yourself right there, take a deep breath in..." "Watch out below." "Ohh!" "Just remember these wise words." "A-one, a-two, a-one, two, three." "I call this the Bagga bear hug." "I hug the little monkey..." "Never liked this song." "In the second place, the words are silly." "And in the first place..." "In the first place, that's now why we're here." "Oh, my point exactly." "Now, I don't know very much about acting, but just pretend to believe what you're saying, and you'll be fine." " Okay." " Good." "All right then, ready?" "Huh?" "Oh, ready." "And action!" "No way, totally ridiculous." "It's true, really." "Oh, stop it." "You're pulling my wing." "You don't believe me?" "In the second place, it's impossible!" "Impossible!" "Oh, I guess you don't know Bajrangi, do you?" "Bajrangi?" "Is he real or mythological?" "Ooh!" "What's up, squirt?" "Need a hand?" "Hey, there's Bajrangi now." "I was just talking about you, about how you're the strongest beast in the whole jungle." "Pretty much." "Well, he doesn't think you are." "He doesn't, huh?" "I'll have to show him then I guess, the flying rat!" "Oh, no, no, no, no, it wasn't like that." "You see, I told him that you, uh... you could take two on at once in arm wrestling and win, and then he said..." " Ahem!" " Oh!" "Then he said..." "Oh, oh!" "No one could ever do that." "Oh, yeah?" "Watch and learn." "So who's got the guts to take me on?" "Anybody at all?" "Uh..." "Wasn't talking to you." "Bharela!" "Marela!" "Get over here!" "What are you trying to do, make me look bad?" "Ha ha!" "There's something going on." "Yeah, I wouldn't trust that cub if I was you." "Know what I also told him you could do?" "I told him you could shake the tallest palm tree like a hurricane and make all the coconuts fall to the ground." "And you know what he said?" "Ah!" "Impossible!" "Oh, yeah?" "Watch!" "Boss, I think maybe these guys are messing with you?" "They're playing him like a cheap sitar." "They're playing him like a cheap sitar." " Just forget it, boss!" "Come down!" " Yeah!" " Aah!" " Aah!" "Oof!" "He came down." "So what do you say, sucker?" "Hope you're satisfied." "Well, actually, there was one more thing." "Oh, there was?" "Yeah." "I said you could rescue Alex the parrot, who's being held prisoner by a cruel human in the city, but he just said..." "No way!" "Shut up!" "Where is he?" "Where is this Alex?" "War!" "Here's how we do it in Bollywood." "Karaoke, baby!" "Unh..." "Agh!" "Bharela!" "Sorry, my bad." "Too many mangos." "Huh?" "Yuvi, hurry!" "Get down!" "Get down!" "Get down!" "Duck!" "Ohh!" "Aah!" "Welcome to my world, baby." "Wow!" "Really nice place you've got here." "What a hottie." "Little help!" "Hoist, hoist!" "What's the problem?" "Alex, what a cutie-wootie you are." "Shall we check out the view?" "Nice." "I thought we could go over the opening scene." "I've always wondered what it's like having a pool, you know, to swim in." "It's never too late to find out." "Anyway, about that scene, I was thinking..." "But I'm not in the opening scene, Mr. Khosla." "But that's just what I wanted to talk to you about." "I've been thinking of beefing up the part of the slave girl." "I mean, if you'd be interested." "Are you serious, Mr. Khosla?" "Of course, I'm serious." "Ah." "Huh?" "Quiet!" "Aaah!" " Please, Mom, let me explain." " Stop." "Oh, Bagga, he's just a child, but you..." "That's why I went along, because he's just a kid." "I was what you call the designated adult." "Taking him into the humans' world and almost getting him killed, that's being an adult?" "And you, Bajrangi," "I can't imagine why you would have been a part of this." "You hate the humans." "Uh... well, you see, it was your son... your son's idea!" " He played you." " Like a sitar." " You never listen." " It's embarrassing." " Sad, sad, sad." " True, true, true." "Sorry, ma'am, you were saying?" " No offense, really." " Apologies." "Did you ever stop and think how dangerous it is for our kind out there?" "What if Yuvi had been..." "Nothing was gonna happen." "I was with him, wasn't I?" "Everyone's so scared of the humans." " I say bring it on, you hairless..." " Sultan wasn't scared of them, but they shot him anyway while I stood there watching." "His courage..." "a lot of good that did." "We were both so helpless." "Helpless." "I'm sorry, Mom." "I should have asked you before going out there," "I know, but Papa told me to make sure what happened to him doesn't happen to me and you and everyone." "Papa came to me last night, Mom, and he said... he said, "Yuvi..."" "He's gone, Yuvi." "Your father's dead, and the dead don't come back." "Come on!" "Where am I, a PETA convention?" "Get me outta this soap opera and take me back home!" "I mean, right now." "Right now." "Right now, do you understand?" "!" "Uh-oh, loony alert." "We got a parrot who keeps repeating himself over and over." "Oh, wait a second, I forgot." "That's all you dodos do, right?" "Shut up, you ape." "Why don't you go and peel a banana?" "How about I peel you?" "Whoa, chimpo." "Yes, in the second place, why would you want to give up all of this, this fresh air and freedom, to go back to a prison?" "Freedom, my foot!" "You think this is freedom?" "Think again, dude." "I'll tell you what freedom is." "500 channels of action, comedy, drama, and reality television." "And the best thing of all is there are no irritating monkeys." "That does it, let me go!" "Chimpo!" "Now listen, dodo, just 'cause you're from the city, doesn't mean you're not one of us." "Don't forget your jungle heritage." "Take a chill pill, dude." "The jungle's your thing, not mine." "I checked out of this place a long time ago, man." "Hey, what good's this flightless turkey gonna do against the humans?" "Forget him!" "We don't need him!" "I keep telling' you guys, the army's pumped and loaded." "All we gotta do is give the word, and it's war!" " Go for it." " Why me?" " You're shorter." " You're dumber." " I'm what-er?" " Tall." "Oh, yeah, that's true." "Okay, war!" "Oh, monkey, that's impressive, man." "What an army." "That's all you've got, and you're gonna take on humans?" "Are you off your nut?" "That does it!" " Bad monkey!" " You better run!" "Don't you dare touch me, you..." "you-you dumb simian." " Simian, huh?" "Come here, you!" " Aah!" "Come here and say that again!" "Did you know kidnapping's a crime under section 364A?" "Uh, what'd he just say?" "We're all very, very sorry, Alex, but you're our only hope." "Only you know the humans' language." "If we're gonna reach them, we need you to be our voice." "Have you lost your mind?" "Like I've got time for that kind of runaround." "Going from the builder to the developer to the mayor, then the governor, and when they're no help, I suppose you think" "I'd walk all the way to Delhi!" "Delhi?" "Uhh..." "What's Delhi, Alex?" "You gotta be kidding." "You don't know Delhi?" "It's the capital of our country, bonehead." "You know, CNN, IBM, BBC, ministers, committees, kickbacks, blackmail, scandals, Parliament." "Parliament?" "That's right, Parliament." "Do you go to school?" "Where the people sit who, like, run the country" "You know, ministers and all." "Ministers?" "They're the ones who sit around and listen to the country's problems all day and try to solve them if they can." "So if we have a problem, we go to them?" "Finally, you got it." "Oh, oh, no!" "No, no, no." "Get that idea right outta your head." "Forget it." "The only place I'm going is home." "You couldn't get me to Delhi if my life depended on it!" "Aah ha ha!" "You were saying?" "If Papa was here and it was one of us who'd gotten killed, do you think he would have said we should all run away?" "Leaving this jungle would be like leaving Papa." "It's full of his memories." "Alex must be made to change his min." "We will go to Delhi." "Delhi?" "Are you kidding?" ""D" for dirty, "e" for influenza, "I" for losers." "Influenza doesn't start with a..." ""H" for holy... yeah." "Now you know why." "Now you know why you are the followers and I am your leader, so pay attention, and I'll spell out for you just what I've got in mind." "Heh!" "We're going to Delhi, or towards Delhi at least, but we're never going to get there, 'cause at some point along the way, that little green wisecracker, Alex, is going to have a fatal accident," "and what happens then?" "They'll come crawling to us." "Us!" "Crawling on their knees, begging us to save them from the humans!" "And then at last, the Age of the Monkeys will come!" "And then, my friends, ahh!" "Uh, war?" "Ohh!" "Trust me, it's gonna be great." "I'm not going, and that's that." "Aw." "Ugh, You're crazy." "Yeah... all of you." "Hey!" "I rest my case." "Forget it." "Oh." "Aah!" "Aah!" "An animal!" "A wild animal!" "What was it?" "A leopard, I think!" "What's going on?" "Oh, no, it's the zoo for all of us!" "What are they saying, Alexander?" "They know there are animals on the train!" "But how did they find out?" "Who gave us away?" "Why don't you ask the monkey here?" " Bajrangi, did you leave this car?" " Uh-uh." " You sure?" "Tiny bit?" " Uh." " Not at all?" " No." "Not even a little?" " What part of no don't you..." " Shh!" "I wasn't doing anything, just standing guard." "I wasn't doing anything, just standing guard." "Not gonna believe him, are you?" "Hey, the parrot hates me for some reason." "He'd say anything." "Shh!" "Shh!" "Watch out!" "Someone's trying to get in!" "Mom?" "Yuvi?" "Are you here?" "Hey, over there!" "Down at the other side!" " Where?" " Down here, hurry!" "Come here." "It went inside here." "Break it open." "Come now, we have to do the thing right." "Show me." " Follow me." " That's weird." "Shine the light here." "What is it?" "I could have sworn I saw it." "Yeah?" "It's not here now." "I told you to stay with the others." "You almost got us caught." "I know." "I wasn't gonna come, but just as I was falling asleep, Papa came to me again." "Yuvi, you were only dreaming." "It wasn't a dream, Bagga, I swear." "Papa was as real as you are, and, Mom, I'm not making it up." "He was really there." "Could it be a father's love has cheated death, or is little Spotty off his meds again?" "Tune in next week." "Music swells, fade to black, and credits role." "But I object, Milord!" "Milord, the last witness' testimony is irrelevant." "May I remind the court that this is a case of attempted murder?" "Milord, I will prove that in the middle of the night while the parrot was asleep, utterly defenseless, this monkey, with a knife the size of a machete, did attempt to make the parrot an ex-parrot!" "Can he deny it?" "Yeah, good luck with that one." "Baj, what have you got to say?" "You're not gonna believe a paranoid parrot." "The guy's got an obsession." "He even dreams about me." "Objection, Milord!" "My dreams are irrelevant." "In fact, I was dreaming about a cockatoo named Aspasia, but I woke up just in time to see you trying to butcher me!" "Listen, you bird brain, what do you mean "trying"?" "If I wanted you dead, trust me, you'd know it." "Bang bang!" "And nothing's left but a pile of feathers!" "Enough!" "All this childish fighting has got to stop." "It's not getting us anywhere." "Bajrangi, not one more word." "As for you, listen to me carefully, Alex." "Without you, we have no chance of getting to Delhi, that's true." "Without us, you'll never get back home again, so it's in everyone's interest for you to stop all your shenanigans!" "Fine, fine." "On one condition." "Clint Eastwood over here leaves the guns behind." "Otherwise, forget it." "Count me out!" "Ha!" "You can take my guns from my cold, dead fingers!" "Oh, don't be so melodramatic." "You're a big, brave monkey." "You don't need those silly weapons." " Come on, drop 'em." " Hey!" "No!" "Come on!" "Never!" "There." " Gah!" " Now, isn't that better?" "I feel so violated." "Take away his gun and his machete and look what happens to him." "Tsk tsk tsk." "Freud would have a field day." "Hey, maybe we could find you a really big banana." "All clear." "Good." "Huh?" "Knock it off!" "I see you!" "Sheesh!" "Sir, uh..." " I got it." " You sure?" "I got it!" "Sir, is it really true?" "Did they take away your weapons, sir?" "'Cause if they did, we think the only thing to do now is to forget the whole thing." "We always knew your plan was ridiculous." "Now it's just pointless." "Huh?" "Uh, we did?" "Well, not me." "I love it." "Still, it makes the whole plan trickier, those guys taking your hardware away." "Pointless, you might say." "Again, we see why you guys are the followers and I'm the leader." "So I ain't packing heat, so what?" "You guys are still packing heat, aren't you?" "Uh, depends on how you define "heat."" "Huh?" "Heat?" "Oh, sure, we're packing." "Good." "So wait for my signal, and then when they're least expecting it, we'll..." " War!" " War!" "Hey!" "Shh!" "Wait for it." "How will we ever get to Delhi now?" "The train's the only one who knew the way." "Man, oh, man, are you clowns lucky you have me here." "Where was the train headed?" " Delhi." " So where are the tracks headed?" " Delhi." " And if we follow the tracks?" "Delhi!" "Common sense." "Follow me." "Huh?" "A fork!" "Hmm." "Oh, this is just perfect." "Common sense?" "Nonsense!" "Leave it to the monkey!" "We could end up in Madagascar." "Let's turn back." "At least that way, we know where we're going." "What do we do, Mom?" "When the wind of fate slams the door, it opens a window that wasn't open before." "A bat!" "Precisely that." "I am a bat." "Raju is the name, travelers aid is the game." "On our way to Delhi, are we?" "How'd you know that?" "Everyone knows that." "News of your great quest has traveled on the jungle telegraph." "I kid." "You never heard of the Internet?" "Now, where'd I put that?" "Ah, here it is." "Huh?" "Topographical chart, baby." " Uh?" " A map." "Thanks a lot." "Do you have a map to help us read the map?" "Hey, I'd go easy on the sarcasm if I were you." "That'll get you nowhere and slowly, too." "Guys, guys, please, I can't take another step." "Sorry." "We tried to get you a private jet." "Stop complaining!" "No, kidding." "I've had it." "Just kill me!" "Kill me!" "Finish it!" "Guys, I think Polly here's finally gone crackers." "Yes, I've gone mad!" "Put me outta my misery!" "Hey, just for the record, this was not my idea." "You all see that, right?" "I'm being forced to squeeze his scrawny neck till he dies." "We're all together on that!" "Bajrangi, quiet!" "You too, Alex." "There's an oasis just ahead." "But take care." "Come on, guys, we're getting a little outta hand here, don't you think?" "Boy, they're really gone, aren't they?" "They've been transported, dear." "Their spirits are in paradise." "Yes, lovely, but you see, we've still got to get Delhi, and we can't do that with those two in lotus land." "Oi." "It's hard calling them back once they're there." "Stuff two chilies up their nose." "That might bring them down to earth, you know?" "Stop teasing, dear." "This is nothing to joke about." "Try twirling clockwise for a week while chanting and burning incense." "That often works." "Or make a pilgrimage to the holy shrine of the..." "Thank you, but I think let the two of them sleep it off and we'll be fine by morning." "Will you help us find our way?" "To Delhi?" "Of course, of course." "Though why anyone would want to go there, I don't know." "The stories I could tell you about Delhi." "Maybe not." "Anyway, we'll set you on your way first thing in the morning." "The important thing to keep in mind, though, is no matter where you go, stay far away from those caves on the other side of the valley." "The lair of Kalia and his hyenas." "Stumble around in there and chances are, you won't be back." "I'll spare you the gruesome details, lad, but trust me, they're dreadful animals." "You don't want to run into them, so just keep away from those caves." "I knew you'd come, Papa, I knew it!" "Quiet, Yuvi, you'll wake the others." "But that's just what I want to do, so they'll see that you're really here!" "Nobody believes me, Papa, but they'll have to believe me now." "It won't make any difference, son." "They still won't be able to see me." "But..." "But why can't they see you, Papa?" "They all thin I'm somewhere far away." "None of them know how close I really am, only you." "So Mom can't see you, either?" "She'll see me, Yuvi, but only when the time is right." "In the meantime, I've come to warn you." "You must be extra vigilant for your enemies are at work even at this hour, and enemies need not be outsiders." "Sometimes they can be one of our own." "Yeah, why not let the hyenas do my dirty work?" "No one needs to know I was here at all." "But, Papa?" "Bajrangi?" "Was that you laughing?" "Hey, why aren't you back with the others?" "Get outta here!" "Go on!" "Oh, where am I?" "Bajrangi, what are you doing?" " Shh!" " Why is Alex there?" "Shh shh!" "Hey, wait a second!" "Where are we?" "Oh, my gosh, the caves they warned us about." "We've gotta go!" "Hurry, come on!" "Oh, no, no, no!" "You're our special guests." "We're having you all for supper!" "Uh, and you are?" "Call me anything." "Just don't call me late for chow." "My friends call me Kalia..." "Kalia..." "Kalia!" "Kalia!" "Kalia!" "Kalia!" "Oh, Pierre?" "Oui oui, monsieur?" "What's on the menu tonight, huh?" "For starters," " we have parrot pancakes..." " Yum!" "then roasted rack of leopard cub, and finally some marinated monkey brains!" "Oh, I'm crazy about Indian food, especially when the ingredients are fresh." "I've got news for you." "You've just bought yourself a whole heap of grief, fool." "Okay, men, attack!" "The code word is war!" "War, guys, I said war!" "War..." "Shh." "I wouldn't." "Okay, if you guys are out there, you're fired!" "Hit it, boys!" "We're sorry." "This was all an accident." "Will you please let us go, Kalia?" "Sure, why not?" "Mon dieu!" "All you gotta do is kill us, and you're free to go." "Sound like fun?" "I love a meal that puts up a fight." "Oh, you're not scared of us, are you?" "Just 'cause we got lots of teeth, and these big, what do you call 'em, claws?" "And you're outnumbered 20 to 1?" "You're right to be scared." "What have you got, kid?" "You've got nothing, nothing!" "Well, I've got one thing." " Yeah?" " Mom." "Gonna need a bigger pot!" "I can't fly!" "I can't fly!" "I can't fly!" "I don't want to die." "Oh." "Uh... huh?" "Aah!" "Oh, nice, hyena!" "Ohh!" "Ohh!" "Aaah!" "Hmm." "Oh." "Aaah!" "Oh, boy." "No, no, no, no, no, please!" "Tag team." "Ooh!" "Someone needs a bath." "Ohh!" "Ooh!" "Mom!" "Mama!" "Ow!" "Ooh hoo hoo hoo!" "Oh, little brat!" "Nice kid you raised there!" "Oh, I think it's broken!" "Let's start over." "Uh, hi." "Hey!" "Hey, gotta run!" "Bye!" "Hey, where you going?" "What about dinner, huh?" "So long, Kalia!" "Guess you won't be in such a hurry to put monkey on the menu again, huh?" "Go on, run!" "And don't come back, or I'll finish the job, you mangy mutt!" "Ah heh heh... uh..." "When I think I nearly got you killed, Yuvi," "I never would have forgiven myself." "I've been a very bad monkey." "I see that now." "What I did was wrong." "Forgive me." "Bagga, tell Bajrangi he's no longer part of our quest." "He must go." "There's one thing he will never understand... the way of the protector is more righteous than the way of the destroyer." "Trying to silence Alex, the one voice we have for speaking to the humans?" "I cannot forgive that, but his voice was not silenced, and no one's going to stop us from getting to Delhi." "Actually, Mom, I've got some bad news about Alex." "I don't think he can talk to the humans." "He can't even make a sound." "He's lost his voice." "Bajrangi, can't you see what you've done?" "You've ruined everything." "Hmm..." "Yes, this is a very serious case." "Very serious indeed." "Fortunately, we have experience in this sort of thing, don't we, dear?" "Mmm." "Didn't Vijay lose his voice that time we played Vegas, and you had to go and..." "Never mention Vegas!" "Oh, yes, now I remember." "It was Rajiv, actually, and we were playing in Chicago." "I remember it well because the reviews were particularly flattering." "They liked my legs." "Mm-mmm, dear, remember?" "The Chicago reviewers skewered your legs, but they were a smash in Sheboygan." "At least I get reviewed, which is more than some of us can say, right, dear?" "Wait, wait, what about when I opened in Dubai?" "You think these people care about your stupid reviews?" "Yeah, no, I suppose not." "Can you help us get his voice back?" "Go on, dear, if you're such an expert, you tell them." "Uh, well, I suggest plenty of fluids, bed rest, medication..." "Did I say bed rest?" "Oh, you're of no use at all." "They need to get to Delhi." "They don't have time for all that." "Just tell them how to find Jadi Butti Baba, the wise old hermit." "You know." "Jedi Fruity Mama?" "Oh, he lives deep in the mountain on the banks of the river." "No one's seen him for years." "I'm not sure if he still keeps regular office hours." "Whoa, just look at this place, huh?" "It's like a temple or a shrine, you know?" "You could almost feel the healing power." "Just wait." "This old holy man will have Alex squawking his head off in no time." "Holy man!" "Hello?" "Yoo-hoo!" "Baba!" "Uh, Bagga, I think you're sitting on him." "Whoops!" "Sorry!" "You need a hand?" "Hey, easy, easy, easy!" "Show a little respect." "We're dealing with a saint." "Master?" "Sensei?" "Yo, mahatma!" "I wonder if this is a kind of test or riddle" "I have to solve or something?" "I accept your challenge, Master!" "Who is it whose cries I feel in the depths of my soul?" "If Baba's here, then Baj..." "This is good." "Baj, you getting close?" "Ahem, uh..." "Gah!" "Suffering Shiva, this guy's breath is awful." "No wonder he's a hermit." "Mmm..." "Sir, this is Alex." "Alex lost his voice last night." "Alex, open your mouth." "Ah, yes, it's m-m..." "Malaria?" "Mm-mmm." "M-m-m..." "Milk allergy?" "M-m-malignancy." "It afflicts kings and princes." "But what is it called?" "T-t-t..." " Tumor!" " Tummy tuck?" "T-t-t... tension!" "Hypertension." "High blood pressure leads to stroke, aneurism, heart attack." "I recommend m-m-m..." " Machete!" " Macaroni!" "M-medicating it with a compound consisting of ch-ch-ch..." " Cha-cha lessons?" " Cheddar cheese!" "Chi-chi-chicory, mustard seed, and aloe, the bark of the sandalwood tree, ground very fine, saffron, just a pinch or two, wild yellow roses, cinnamon rhubarb, camphor, pomegranate, and fresh guava fruit." "Which of you will g-g-gather all this for your friend?" "Uh..." "Oh, boy, I guess I deserve that one, huh?" "Mm-hmm." "Ah!" "This one!" "What are you doing, you crazy monkey?" "Sandalwood bark, see?" "It's fine." "Whoa..." "Aah!" "Black "soots" you." "Sorry." "Why you little..." "Aah!" "Oh, watch your step." "These thorns are killers." "Ah!" "Oh, yeah!" "Ahh!" "Was it red or, no, yellow, yellow, yellow." "Perfect." "Ah!" "Mmm!" "Aah!" "A-6, miss." " D-11, hit." " Eee!" "D-12... hit!" "Eee!" "Aah!" "Uh-uh!" "Eee!" "Here." "Alex?" "Well?" "Uh... uh-uh." "Huh?" "Okay?" "Ahh... hmm." "Eh!" "What was wrong with that one?" "Uh..." "You're outta your mind!" "There's no way I'm climbing out there!" "Forget it!" "Ahh!" "Ahh!" "Ah ahhh!" "Oh!" "Okay, okay!" "Aah!" "Okay." "Mmm!" "Oh, no!" "Aah." "Aah!" "Pump out the monkey." "Pump out the monkey." "Pump, pump, pump, pump, pump." "Blah!" "Blah!" "Who's laughing?" "It's not funny." "You can't keep this up, Baj." "No food or rest, you're wasting away." "I know that, but I swore to myself for all the terrible things I did," "I won't eat or rest until Alex's voice returns." "As heaven is my witness, I will sacrifice everything to get him well again." "Well, well, looks who's here." "We once had a leader, a mighty monkey leader, and a mighty monkey leader was he." "Uh... he's gone." "I wonder where he went, don't you?" "Our leader would never go crawling around on his knees for a parakeet." "Our leader is a warrior, not a glorified waiter!" "Whoa, whoa, whoa, what are you doing?" "That's my line." "You imposter, you!" "You're not our leader!" "Fine, then you're not my followers." "We're not?" "Are you kidding me?" "How about when I was all alone out there with crazy Kalia and hundreds of hyenas?" " You hung me out to dry!" " True." "And all this time, I've been killing myself, gathering stuff for Alex." "Did you guys offer to help?" "Course not!" "True." "True." "I could carve better followers out of liverwurst, real followers who are willing to do anything for their leader, sacrifice anything." "Yeah, what if I asked you to chop off the tips of those pinkies you keep waving around?" " Okay..." "Uh, no." " No." "See?" "Go on, the two of you!" "Go on, get lost." "Who needs you?" "I'm better off without you, believe me!" "Go on!" "At least they could've put up an argument." "Awk!" " What do you want?" " Awk!" "Awk!" "Uh, hold on a sec." "I can explain." "Bagga?" "Do you really think Alex will get his voice back by the time we get to Delhi?" "I don't know, kiddo, but the way things are going," "I'm more worried about Bajrangi making it to Delhi in one piece." "He hasn't slept, eaten, or left Alex's side for three days." "He's dead on his feet." "Bawk!" "Do you know the story of Hanuman, Alex?" "Uh-uh." "Well, Hanuman was a brave and mighty hero who was always facing danger or being attacked by one demon or another." "But he never got depressed, because along with great strength, he had endless patience." "He knew that no matter how bad things got, no matter how many demons he had to fight, he could always turn to his master," "Lord Ram, God of Virtue, and say..." "Wow, what a hottie." ""Wow, what a hottie."" "Awk." "What'd you just say to me?" "Awk?" "No, I mean, before that." " Uh..." " Not the squawking!" "Before that!" "Uh... aah!" "So help me, if you said what I think you said, it'll be the last thing you ever say!" "Should they be doing that?" "I don't think that's very good for hypertension." "Poor, Baj, and he's been such a good monkey." "Bajrangi!" "You traitor!" "Your voice won't be the only thing missing when I catch you!" "Stop, Bajrangi!" "Bajrangi, I'm warning you!" "Thought you could make a fool out of me, did you?" "Did you?" "Well, we'll see about that!" "Aah!" "Uhh... aah!" "When I think of all I've done for you, boy, what an idiot." "I didn't eat, drink, or poop for three days because of you!" "People act like I'm such a big stinker, but you, you're worse than that!" "You little traitor!" "Okay, now for the last time, what did you say?" "Say it!" "Try again!" "Talk to me, you little feathered liar!" "I'll give you one last chance." "What was it that Hanuman would say when things got really bad?" "Hail Lord Ram." "Right." "Hail Lord Ram." "Ehh." "Oh, no!" "Company, atten-tion!" "Yes, sir!" "Right, chaps, look sharp!" "Let's show these bogies what's what, wot?" "Been a while since we've had a good tallyho!" "Maybe if I put the rock down... and run away!" "This doesn't mean you're off the hook!" "I'll have to deal..." "Aah!" "Deal with you later!" "Shut up and run!" "Don't you tell me what..." "That's funny, look!" "Now Alex is chasing Baji." "No, no one's chasing the other." "Obviously both are running away from something else." "Should we be running away?" "Well, let me think." "After careful deliberation, I would vote yes, run!" "Sir, the enemy has rendezvoused with support units." "We count five!" "Right, current position?" "90 degrees east, 100 meters and closing." "Roger, all units alert." "Ready, lads, we're going in!" "Aah!" "Artillery, ready?" "Ready, sir!" " Aim!" " Yes, sir!" "Fire!" "Yeow!" "Hurry, Bagga, hurry!" "Wait!" "Hurry, everyone in here!" "Unh!" "Must run faster." "Go!" "I'm going, I'm going!" "I'm going!" "Mom, I think it's a train!" "Come on, hurry!" "All aboard!" "And to think we trusted you, Bajrangi." "You couldn't resist, could you?" "You had to go after Alex." "I swear I didn't." "Oh, shut it!" "I wouldn't believe you if you swore on your own grave." "Wait, give me a chance here." "You don't understand." "Believe me, I understand plenty." "Both of you shut up!" "Aha, the bird can talk!" "Uh..." "The bird can talk." "Your voice has returned?" "Yeah, amazing, isn't it?" "Good news all around." "I'm wondering if he ever really lost it!" "I say, what say we try out that new formation, eh, lads?" "Yes, sir!" "Air-to-surface missile formation now!" "Jolly good!" "Well, are you satisfied?" "You did this, you know?" "Me?" "Oh, sure!" "This is all because of me!" "Yeah, I was the one who whacked a bee's nest, right?" "Did I say go to Delhi?" "Did I say, "Please come kidnap me" ""from my beautiful home" ""and drag me into the jungle!"" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Oh!" "They're behind us!" "Get down, Yuvi!" "Hide!" "While you're down there, Yuvi, see if there's anywhere for me to hide!" "Permission to attack, sir?" " Right-o, in you go!" " Sir!" "Hiyah!" "Aah!" " Bagga!" " Aah!" "Mom!" "Yuvi!" "Bajrangi, Alex!" "Jump!" "We're coming!" "Come on, get over here!" "What are you waiting for?" "Bajrangi, my foot's stuck!" "Serves you right." "You ever hear of a thing called karma?" "No, probably not." "You've never even heard of Hanuman." "Give me a break!" "Look, can we talk about this later?" "Please?" "I ought to just leave you!" "Bajrangi, please!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Oh!" "There's no time, Bajrangi." "Go on, jump!" "Get going!" "Jump!" "Engage and destroy?" "Negative." "Curse the luck!" "They're out of our sector now." "Afraid we'll have to toddle back to base." "Bloody rum show, wot!" "Bbbbbb!" "All clear." "So anyone want to do that ride again?" "That's not funny, Bagga." "Now, the first thing we have to do is find a way out of here and hope the others are all right." "Bajrangi, are you out of your mind?" "Why didn't you jump, you suicidal monkey?" "The protector way is better than the destroyer way, at least according to Begum." "She could be right." "In fact, I'm sure she's right." "She's not the only one." "You were right, too." "I've been a traitor to my own kind, going on about my cushy life in the human world when all the time the humans were tearing your world apart." "I'm sorry, Baj." "Heh heh." "You've got nothing to be sorry for." "If anyone should be sorry, it's me for hating you when all you were trying to do was help." "I wasted so much energy thinking of ways to kill you." "Hey, you know something?" "I got more happiness out of that one moment when you and I went off the cliff together than I ever got out of all the days of plotting your death." "You know, I think there was something funny about that coconut milk we drank, like, it was fermented or something." "I'm feeling funny in my head." "You sound just like my human when he comes home late from a party." "Then he usually leaves all the lights on and falls asleep in his underwear." "Hey, am I your new best friend?" "Better not say it right now." "It'd just be the coconut milk talking." "Aw, come on, dude, you're my best friend." "You won't tell me if I'm your best friend?" "Okay, you're my new best friend." "So I'm your closest friend, and you won't even tell me?" "Ohh!" "I think I need some water." "Aah!" "Aah!" "No, no, no!" "No, no, no, Mr. Tiger, please!" "Please let me go!" "Meow, meow!" "Please, stay away!" "Don't kill me!" " Don't kill me!" " Don't kill me!" "Stay away!" "Stay away!" "Bad food!" "Bad food!" "Bad food!" " Bajrangi!" " Just in time!" "I was almost a goner!" "I looked up, and there was this tiger!" "No, no, no, I'm only a cat." "Just a cat!" "Brother Tiger?" "Not a tiger." "Just a cat." "A cat." "Meow, meow." "Talk to me." "They've killed all the tigers around here." "If it were up to the humans," "I think they would kill all the tigers everywhere." "I didn't want to die like the others, so I made believe I was a cat." "I've been pretending so long," "I've forgotten what it's like to be a tiger." "I know." "I know what you're thinking, that I'm a coward, and you're right." "I am a coward, but at least my head is still on my shoulders, not hanging from some hunter's wall." "You're not a coward." "At least you had a good excuse for doing what you did, not like me." "You did it to save your life." "I did it for HDTV, but I see now this isn't about one jungle." "It's about every animal whose home is being destroyed." "You said it, dude, and that's why we need you to be our voice." "No, he will not be our voice, because we're not going to Delhi." "What fools we've been." "Did we really thin we'd get them to change by complaining to one set of humans about the misdeeds of another, when all humans are the same?" "Cruel and heartless." "They'll spare none of us." "Not you, not me." "Not..." "I won't let them do that to Yuvi." "I'm taking him back now." "We must all go back now while we still can." "We're not going to Delhi." "There's only one person Mom will listen to now." "If he doesn't come..." "Look, Mom, it's Papa!" "I knew he'd come!" "He's there!" "Can't you see him?" "Look!" "Stop this, Yuvi." "I know how much you miss him, but your father's gone." "He's never coming back." "But, Mom, how can you say that?" "He's right there!" "Please, can't you see him?" "No, I can't, and no one else can, either." "Actually, I think I can." "It's Sultan, all right." "It's Sultan big as day!" "Yes, yes, you can see him." "All you have to do is look, but not out there." "Here, in Yuvi, in his tiny, courageous heart that got us all started in the first place." "He's here in the friendship between Alex and Bajrangi." "I mean, what kind of crazy miracle is that?" "He's here in your love for the cub that you and he brought into this world." "That courage, friendship, and love, they're the essence of Sultan." "They're what keep him alive." "Whoever says that they can't see Sultan, well, they're just not looking, 'cause he's right here." "I've been wondering what my role in this whole journey was." "To provide comic relief and a bit of shade?" "Maybe this is it, to make you guys understand that Sultan is alive in Yuvi and alive in each and every one of us." "Begum, you're almost there." "So this is Delhi." "I never thought we'd make it." "Next stop, Parliament." "Terrific, but how do we find, let alone get into this Parliament, huh?" " I have a plan." " I got an idea." "You first." "Go ahead." "After you." "No, no, no, go ahead." "You first." "No, you go first." "No, I insist." "You first." "Will you stop?" "Just go on, spit it out." " You first!" " What's your stupid plan?" "Aw, shut up, the two of you." "You can stuff your plans." "I doubt either one of 'em's any good." "Well, what is the plan, fearless leader?" "I'm all ears." "What?" "Good God, we don't have a plan?" "What were we thinking coming all this way without a plan?" "!" "We're finished, toast, kaput!" "We've got to have a plan!" "We can't just hop out of the truck." "It'd be total chaos..." "fleeing crowds, screaming in terror, old ladies with cameras, TV news reporters." "Live from Delhi, Animals Gone Wild!" "Bagga, you're a genius." "Huh?" "Aah!" "Aah!" "Ohh!" "Honey, you're not gonna believe this." "Well?" "That's not very nice." "Everybody run!" "Faster, faster!" "Okay, nice and slow." "Bajrangi, for the first time in my life," "I'm starting to wish I had a gun." "Oh, no, no, no, you could never lift it, and your feathers would get stuck in the little trigger thing." "CNN, coming through!" " Excuse me." " Hey!" "CNN and all that." "It's just like you said." "The whole world of humans is listening." "Alex, it's your cue." "Oh, brother." "I..." "I..." "I, um..." "You don't see that every day, do you?" "Alex, what's the matter?" "Why don't you say anything?" "What's wrong?" "Stage fright, dude." "Give me a minute." "Stage fright?" "Huh!" "Are you a professional or what?" "Come on!" "Ahem." "Hello?" "!" "This parrot's watched too much Bollywood." "Maybe they're shooting a commercial or something." "Who knew he could sing?" "Yeah, who knew?" "And now he's got his own radio show." "I always sensed that parrot was going places." "Didn't you sense that parrot was going places?" "Yeah, to Delhi!" "Not bad." "They should put him on TV." "Yeah." "Look, it's Bajrangi." "So it is." "MARELA He made it to Delhi." "Of course, he gets all the glory." "He never would have gotten close if it weren't for us." "How do you figure that?" "Shut up." "Whose side are you on?" "Alex, knock it off." "What do you think you're doing, huh?" "Hey, everyone's watching." "Don't look so ferocious." "I'm feeling a little ferocious, and better that than being a laughingstock." "Are you making fun of us, Alex?" "Look at them, they're all laughing at us!" "What are you doing?" "He's right, you know." "How are they gonna take us seriously if they laugh at us?" "Guys, chill, I'm working a tough room here." "You gotta trust me." "I was just warming them up a little." "If I'd gone right to the heavy stuff, they would have been out the door." "Thank you!" "You like the singing parrot, huh?" "Pretty funny, right?" "Yeah." "But did anyone bother to hear the words of the song?" "Anybody?" "Didn't any of you even wonder why a parrot, a leopard cub and his mother, a bear, and a monkey would all risk their lives to come here?" "We'd tell you if you'd just listen." "I know, it's easier to laugh or switch the channel than it is to listen, isn't it?" "People are listening now." "What would you like to say?" "Thank you, but not yet." "When someone from Parliament comes here, someone with the power and the will to help us, then I'll talk." "The city has come to a complete standstill as we await developments here." "It's a scene of utter chaos inside Parliament House right now." "A debate is underway on whether the government should send a representative." "A vote is finally expected at any minute." "This just in, the vote has been postponed again." "No word yet on when the vote will take place." "Meanwhile, the entire nation holds its breath." "We've been here for hours now, but no one in this crowd is going anywhere, as we all wait to see if Parliament will accede to the animals' demands for a meeting." "Breaking news, the resolution has passed, and a representative will be sent to meet with the animals." "They've done it!" "This parrot, monkey, bear, and leopard cub have shocked us all!" "Hey." "Yes, I've got to see." "Please make way!" "Hello." "What can I do for you?" "Go on, tell him." "Tell him our troubles, Alex." "Make him understand." "You can do it!" "Sir, we've come to tell you that..." "That... that humanity is doomed!" "Right now, millions of animals are on their way here to attack you all!" "Your cities, your families, your homes, all will be destroyed." "We won't stop until all of you, the entire human race, is extinct or in a cage." " He's inane!" " Shoot them!" "So what do you think?" "Makes you feel scared and angry, doesn't it?" "Having your homes and families threatened." "Man, you think we'd really do any of that stuff?" "Who do you think we are, you?" "'Cause that's how you've made us feel every day for centuries." "You attack us with your guns, your bulldozers, your pollution, and deforestation." "A lucky few of us, you keep in your homes as pampered pets for your children to play with, while the rest of us, you hunt down and kill for our skins or feathers or just because it seems fun for you." "Do you think we feel nothing?" "Isn't our habitat our home?" "Aren't our little ones children?" "What has this cub ever done that he should have his father killed?" "He should be playing and goofing off." "Instead, he's traveled all this way to try and reason with you, to plead for his own life." "A kid shouldn't have to do that." "And when he finally got here, when we showed ourselves to you, what did we hear?" ""Kill 'em all!" "Kill 'em!"" "We may come from the jungle, but you're the ones who look like savages to me." "When we first set out, Delhi seemed so far away." "We didn't realize that reaching Delhi would be the easy part." "We'd still have to reach your hearts." "If there's anyone out there who's been touched by these words, stop killing us." "Stop bulldozing us." "Live with us." "We've only got one world." "Let's share it in peace for all our sake's." "Who will stand with me and say," ""Let's share the world"?" "Share the world!" "Share the world!" "Share the world!" "Share the world!" ""Share the world."" "I like it." "Share the world!" "Share the world!" " Share the world!" " Share the world!" "Share the world!" " Ya-hoo!" " Share the world!" "Done." "Ha ha ha ha!" "Whoo!" "Whoo!"