"Translated by Roberto Calandra" "Ouh, Look there!" "Fast, Up Up Up" "Hey wait, why should I climb?" "I don't get it..." "It's the two of us, so if i'm not climbing, you go" "No wait, we will play it as we always do" "Ok, think a number" "Did you think it?" "Yes" " You lost, c'mon climb" "Wait a minute!" "Odd or even?" "Even" "C'mon, Let's make it quick..." "Go" "First the hand and then the feet" "Climb up!" " Calm down!" "Quiet" "Fast" "What are you saying?" "Silent !" "Climb !" "Grasp the window !" "Quiet!" "if you fall, you wake the whole town..." "Bring me down!" "Salvo !" "Valentino !" "BORN TIRED" "Music:" "Tinturia" " Dumani Dumani" "Six months before" "All the stories begins with:" "There once was..." "The story that i'll tell you, instead begin with:" "There always was..." "Yes, because, there always was in Sicily..." "A town where the life flow normally" "Where people work, marry, get honor, and die" "The one your are seeing, in white dress, with the wife, is Don Ciccio Milazzo." "For the judges he is the big fish of the town" "For the Town he is someone who made some small mistake during youths" "Anyway, here in Cardaci there is a quote:" ""Doesn't fall leaf, without him to know"" "The one you see down there, is the bar "Passalacqua"" "And this is Gino Passalacqua with his common problem" "Do you think it's possible?" "Every night, around 2-2.30 am" "Some bastards ring at my door" "Driiinngg" "Every night." "For months." "I cannot stand it anymore" "Here they are." "These are Salvo and Valentino." "These boys has only one dream in their lifes" "Extend this period which see them unemployed and without responsability about that, they are talking about public office entrance examination" "No, because they partecipate..." "But attention !" "not to win..." "Just to escape the hard grasp of the girlfriends, and take some day of vacation" "So, we have:" "Rome, Post office, 3 days, half board" "Rome no. we have seen everything dude, there is nothing left to see" "When in Rome you see: the colosseum, San Pietro, and Totti's house; what else do you want to see?" "But there are the (female) tourists" "For this, there are the (female) tourists also in Venice" "Stop with Venice" "Ok, stop... but i said it..." "Then we have:" "Milan, Librarians, 3 days, full board" "What can you do in 3 days in Milan?" "what can you do?" "To see Milan you need at least, at least, one month" "But really going fast" "But there are the (female) top models" "Well, for this reasons, there are top models also in Venice" "There they pasture freely. it's their natural habitat" "Stop with Venice Salvo !" "Stop, can you do me this favour?" " Stop Venice..." "Can you do me this favour?" "let's end it" " Stop Venice..." "Here your coffees" "Sorry for the wait guys" "But today my mind is gone" "Even tonight those bastards rang to me" "Gino, please, kindly." " We are talking about job" "About job?" "the 2 of you?" "Let's Hope!" "Let's Hope!" "You know that i care about you" "For me you are like sons" "Keep talking" " Thanks..." "And as the law of opposites want: to two sluggards" "Correspond two girlfriends who work" "And clearly know theirs goals" "What do you think?" "are we gonna make it?" "Sure!" "anyway we don't have alternatives..." "In a month we have the meeting" "Everything will go well, don't worry" "Now let's go, that we have "that" thing to do..." "So, Milan?" "Milan..." "Milan, models, females we will make a massacre" "Always the same plan?" " sure!" "listen, but Padre Renzino..." "Careful !" "Do we really must go To Padre Renzino?" "Again pal?" "Always the same story?" "Sure we must go, but first to the girls." "This time i have a bad feeling Salvo this time they wont' leave us go" "We will to the same end of the football game, that it's 3 months we cannot go there, Salvo." "What are you saying?" "That was because i was injuried." "Then i'll tell her, that we go to Milan and also that tonight we go playing football" "Do you wanna go?" " If there is place..." "I'll show you." "Let me talk. let'go" "She is still alive, it was to check..." "We congratulate for the wide selection that increase day by day" "Clients crowd the shop happily" "Yes, as you can see" "Congratulation for the shop ma'am." "The girls?" "Over there!" "goodbye. thank you, we can continue alone." "Good morning, females!" "what's up?" "Why are you here?" "No, nothing, we were walking by when i thought:" "let's ask something to Loredana" "Do you have something to ask?" "Nooooo" " Then let's move that we don't have time to loose" "Just don't start again with the football, because it's the wrong day" "What football?" "I cannot play..." "I have a groin on my arm that i cannot...." "Tell them as well." "A groin on the arm." "What is it, Valentino?" "In practice there is an examination for Librarians that we didn't believe it, but they accepted us" "Again, with the examinations thing?" "Again, with the examinations thing?" "What should i do with you?" "Why do you embarrasse me?" "5 Years that he carry me all along Italy" "We have been everywhere" "Naples, Rome, Genova" "Only in Venice we have never been" "Do you wanna do that Vale?" "Well, Sandra, missing any alternative" "Did you ever thought about it?" "About what?" "An alternative" "What alternative?" "forget it, whatever" "Great, great!" "Go, Go, GO!" "Post!" "Do that again.." "Make you mother happy, do that for us" "Try it another time, just one time" "Everything useless, how many of these damned examination i did?" "Yes, but..." " Shut up!" "Always talking, let him breath!" "We know, and we really appreciate it always tossed around Italy" "Mum, don't make me think about it..." "That more that suffering from distance..." "How much money i had you wasted for nothing" "But we are happy to spend these money" "Now you are adult" "And see you realized is our only wish" "No, sorry, i cannot... too many delusions" "Tell him something" "Should i slap him?" "And make Padre Renzino having his usual sermon" "Because working is a duty and looking for it, is a duty and find it, is a God's gift and you cannot refuse a God's gift" "Do you remember the Miracle of the Loaves and Fishes?" "also that one was a God's gift" "No, sorry Sir but i don't like fish, don't you have breadstick?" "No one refused" "What do you say boys?" "No, but not like that" "Alleluja!" "it's done." "They accepted" "They will have the examination in Milan" "(Cheering)" "Came here my son." "Now you are really a man" "Music:" "Tinturia" " Fusu e Confusu" "and clap... hey guys, did you heard?" "This time Toni seems resolute" "I heard that Tania left Toni" "Guys, we are talking about a couple that in the last year, broke up 12 times" "We all know that she is difficult... don't do this, don't do that, Toni don't came here, Toni don't go there" "Oh, in the 20th century..." "Guys, are you joking?" "Freedom in the couple is essential, otherwise it's over." "Isn't it Love?" "Of course" "Anyway, with the marriage everything will fix" "Why what happen with the marriage Vale?" "Nothing Love, just, you must think about house, childrens and you don't have time to waste anymore" "No guys, here the problem is another," "He doesn't want to do anything" "A woman need certainty, and what was he offering to Tania?" "30 Years, without a job, and doing nothing from morning till dawn" "About it, when are you leaving for the new examination?" "Tomorrow" "But after all i have gone trough, i do that just for my family" "I do that for me because if this time goes well, me and Sandra will marry" "Love, what is it?" "is it because they didn't have truffle in the pub?" "No problem, we won't go there anymore. we are not forced to go there." "What is it?" "nothing" "It's that you say this thing of the marriage in front of everyone" "Hey, the announce of the marriage was a celebration in the past." "They did also serenade." "Yes, but you could have told me, alone, before" "These are intimate things, between you and me" "Do you see Salvo how is discreet?" "I got it, it's the thing of Valentino telling Sandra that they will get married..." "Love, i didn't told you because i marry you everyday... i don't need to tell it... do i need to tell it?" "and i tell it.... i'll find a job and marry you, because i don't have...." "Good night Salvo!" " Good night Love and i told it like that... it's not important.." "What?" "it's not important?" "No stop Love, it's a very important thing" "I'm strongly agree to the marriage what i meant is that it's something different..." "Good night Valentino!" "Good night..." "Loredana." "No no i'm alone" "Ah, and what he told you?" "Slow Slow" "Where did you got this idea of telling about marrying in front of everybody?" "!" "I told it like that... i'll pass i'll pass?" "you didn't heard Loredana did you see Valentino?" "He promise, he do. and you nothing" "Ok, maybe it was a mistake, c'mon" "Just maybe" "Tonight i feel a bit tired" "I don't feel like waiting one hour, do we really must go?" "what does it mean "do we really must go"?" "shall we change plan now?" "sure that we must go. instead, let's go earlier so that we can go home" "Slow. brake and clutch. brake and clutch" "You ruin my day... the important is that you solved... in the end, what did you say to Loredana?" "I told her, that this is the way I am." "I'm against marrying." "Take it or Leave!" "It's my turn" "Bastards!" "Sons of bitches!" "If i find out who you are, I'll kill you" "Ciccio..." "Ciccio..." "Came to sleep, it's late" "Ciccio..." "Son, remember that in Milan, females are all..." "Shut up!" "let him breath" "Here i gave you 2 sandwich with meat and 2 with mozzarella and ham, just as you like and then there is the Pasta and here the Arancine (Fried meat balls) that will stay warm till tonight, do you got it?" "Mom, the train is leaving..." "Yes Mom, i'm coming, i'm coming..." "Ouh, are you still angry?" "do you must remain angry?" "Do you want me to leave like that?" "What does it change..." "Once that you are there, buy a Panettone, but a good one..." "Mom, do you let me say goodbye to Sandra?" "Bless god, One minute, are you in hurry?" "This one, has been delivered this morning from the Di Blasi's cakeshop" "They say that has been sended by Mr. Milazzo" "If you could kinldy give it to a friend that live in Milan there is the address and everything, could i ever say no?" "!" "Love, it happens to do mistake" "The important is to understand what is the error" "Thanks god, you are 5 years that make me understand my mistakes" "Every single day" "I stay with you, because you make me better" "C'mooon..." "C'mooon...." "Listen, i would like to apologize for yesterday" "Don't worry, go that it's late" "Fast Vale, let's go" "My little, let's go." "Don't tell him anything?" "Should i slap him?" "Fast Salvo, it's late" "Ok, start taking seats that i must greet Loredana" "Ciao Love" "Love, will you call me?" "In 15 minutes, and then every 5 minutes, just like you teach me..." "Ciao Love" "Ciao Ciao!" "Sad... sad..." "I feel dying..." "WTF, exaggerated but i'll survive..." "Be carefull of females in Milan" " Ciao" " Ciao" "Pal, tomorrow disco, i already have the address here" "Females, models, tomorrow will be a massacre" "But we should take another cabin for your mother's stuffs" "She filled us" "This is not her, I must deliver this to Milan for Mr. Milazzo" "Ah, it's not enought her stuffs, also... also others, is it ok?" "Pal, but Mr. Milazzo is..." " Don Ciccio" "Could you put it..." " There is no space!" "i'll put it here then" "Pal, i don't get you..." "Your mother give you a package from Don Ciccio, and you take it without saying anything?" "!" "What is the problem?" "There could be anything inside:" "Drug, weapons, granades sure, machineguns..." "Ok Pal, you took the package, and you are responsible for it..." "I don't want to know anything, I don't know you." "Tomorrow i'll introduce myself." "Goodnight - goodnight" "so..." "Don Ciccio gave me the package with the weapons inside" "Ok Pal, you are right, you are right." "Sleep, goodnight ...to convince you..." "If you want, there is a reason, you have no previous convictions." "you are building a castle for nothing Salvo..." "I'm like this, a builder, good night - good night" "And do you think that all the people with no previous convitions, transport weapons?" "That's the reason, just because not all the people with no previous convitions transport weapons, once in a while, they use a person without previous convitions to make him do something shady" "So for you all the shady people don't have previous convictions" "Pal, relax, sleep we will talk tomorrow..." "No, i don't want to talk tomorrow, for me it's over" "Anyway, you took the package..." " Goodnight" "This is the street" "Pal, we are here in Milan, and you must still deliver the package" "We are losing one day, we look like the Pony Express" "I don't care, now you deliver it, and I go back to the Hotel" "I must prepare for the Disco, I don t care" "Is it here?" "Yes" " Ring him, and let's go" "Commendatore Di Fatta" "Go, don't tell me anything, go" "Good morning ma'am" "We should deliver..." "He should deliver, because i have nothing to do with it this package to the Commendatore Di Fatta" "The Commendatore was waiting for you" "Do you get it?" "he was waiting" "Please come inside" "No ma'am, don't worry..." " Please" "Thank you" "I don't like this story, pal you are in a bad position don't worry, now we deliver the package and blow up" "Finally. why are you late?" "The train was late, right?" "Ah, did you come with the train?" "You have such nice faces of good boys" "Above all without previous convictions" "Speak for youself, because there would be some many things to say about me..." "Who are these?" "Let's see what sent me my friend Ciccio" "Very well" "Valentino Picone and Salvo Ficarra" "The smell of Sicily" "It's true." "Sicilians are the only ones that can do some things" "I don't know if i'm clear..." "Now we try it" "Do you see that there was nothing to worry about" "Relax, stay calm" "Do you remember "The Towering Inferno"?" "me and you..." "Do you have the address?" "Here it is" "This time i feel emotional" "Pal, we are here in Milan, we must be colds and resolutes" "Here we will make a massacre, trust me" "Tano 1 to Razzo 1, here there is something strange" "The nest has been visited by two carrier pidgeons" "It's needed to get them and don't loose their sight when they flight away" "I'll call a patrol now" "Everything fine, they are out, i got them" "I'll think about them, keep in touch" "Is it for us?" "I think it's exagerated" "Pal, here the girls care about some things" "I don't care, i want to do a massacre tonight, c'mon" "Salvo but why don't we do it tomorrow night?" "Tonight Pal, because if something go wrong we have another chance tomorrow to try again" "But if everything goes well, think about our prestige with the friends" "We keep them as relics" "Ok, let's do that tonight..." " Let's go" "Attention, these two have something big in mind, and they want to do it tonight" "I got them" "Now we go to the hotel, and i'll lay down" "But you are crazy!" "Now we are finally in Milan, away from the girls, and we go to the hotel to lay down..." "In the Hotel i'll put my feets like this" " C'mon" "But i have feets like elephant paw - tie your strings" "You are like babies, you shoes are always un-tied" "Give your position" "Via Petrarca, over" "Ouh, Pal, see this - what's that?" "Passalacqua" "It will be a Gino's parent" "I don't care who he is, but we must ring" "No no Salvo!" " He deserve it!" "Are you joking?" "we are in Milan" " Who cares?" "We do that with politeness" " No No No Salvo No!" "Are you near the number 2?" "Yes, it could be the number 2, why?" "Of course, what could i expect from someone who wear the skirt for the Girlfriend?" "Really?" "i'll show you. came here" "Attention, the Judge Clarioni live there." "We are sending support" "In that building live Clarioni, Judge of the Anti-Mafia pool we are ready to intervein" " Crap" "Ring, who cares?" "!" "c'mon" "Stop, Police" "Don't move or I shot" "Who the hell did you ring to?" " I don't know" "Detective, we retired everything, IDs are original the police of their town guaranteed that they are clean and are here for an examination and then, Detective, in their town in their town I know them, they are good boys" "Mr Detective..." " It's not for being..." "It's very easy to explain... - exactly" "I don't even know this one because he has the bad habit, when he go around and see Passalacqua, to start ringing and these are things that really..." "Ouh!" "Silence and shut up!" "Who you told you to sit?" "Sit" "You must bless god that you don't have any previous conviction without previous conviction, us?" "Tell him, tell him..." "It's the ringing thing that they don't stand..." "Skirt or not skirt, outside Sicily, I won't ring anyone else" "Leave them alone, they didn't had respect" "Do you see?" "they put the uniform and they think to be someone" "It'll tell you what." "I will never forget their faces" "If i get them outside the police station and i'll show you what.... let's go, c'mon" "Ouh Salvo, do you have any coin?" "Pal, do you want to buy tickets?" "Of course Salvo, it's normal..." "Let me understand, you want to buy tickets!" "Yes, it's normal" "Not only these people, took us from one side of Milan and bring to the other" "But now i must pay to go back to the Hotel" "You want to make me crazy." "Walk with me" "Salvo" "Ticket?" " Travel card" "When he turn, you go" "Travel card" " Show it" "What?" " The travel card" "So, Ehhmmmmm...." "So, calm, calm , calm, calm..." "I can vouch, the Mr. is a subscriber" "I know because i know him since always, we live togheter and every morning we use it togheter" "Then you show it as well" "What?" " the travel card" "But i already passed, tell him" "Yes, it's true, i can vouch" "What can you vouch?" " no nothing i self-vouch..." "Don't vouch anything, I can control whenever i want, show me the travel card" "Show him, the travel card, so we can go, c'mon - ok, bravo" "So you control me 4-5 times, and in the meanwhile everyone else came and go as they please..." "This is always the same Italy that doesn't work, and the weakest must pay for it" "Juridical fierceness" "Tickets... must be... paid..." "Right?" "Tickets must be  paid" "Paid !" "you go to the kiosk, or the machines or wherever you want the important is that the tickets must be paid" "Look, i'm not joking!" "Now, my two friends, you go to dinner, to your room, and then you sleep you go to your room and then you  paid" "Good evening, thank you" " Farewell" "Good evening, we go to sleep, that we are very tired..." " Sleepy... but first we wait for the green light, we cross the street and we buy the tickets two each - just to be sure because tickets must be paid..." "Good morning so, good morning, ouh!" " good morning 2 tickets of 1.50€ for this wonderful metro and also to this kiosk which i find wonderful and we are experts because we travel a lot of metro and kiosks. here they are" "thank you.... congratulation for the hand hairy just enough" "Farewell, congratulation 'ad maiora', beautiful also the city" "Tickets" "First of all, good morning" " Hello do you want to validate yourself?" "because it's full of bad people that obliterate..." "Thank you, good day" "Do not cross the line, forbidden to talk with the driver." "A moment of attention, please." "The sealed envelopes containing the test, has been handed" "From this moment you can open the envelopes. you have 2 hours of time to complete the examination" "Good work" "Music:" "Tinturia" " Cori Granni" "Psss, what's your name?" "On this side, please" "Did you finish?" " Yes yes" "Are you sure?" " Yes, what is done is done..." "A signature please" "Put your hand on your heart and another one here" "Well, we are done, I thank you..." "With him, that is more..." "Goodbye" "Goodbye" " Goodbye, have a nice day" "I feel excited, you conquer him... i feel really..." "Stop it, Salvo." "He look like a serious person." "I think he want to marry you" "Do you wanna stop it?" "Do you prefer the white dress?" " Stop it" "Should I talk with your mother?" "Stop it!" "You are you calling?" " Sandra" "I see, you want to tell her that you have someone else..." "Do you wanna stop it?" "..." "End of Examination call" "Ready?" "Ready Sweety?" "Ciao sweety, we just get out. yes, everything fine." "Yes, perfect." "We answered all the questions." "I wrote that the Capital of France is EuroDisney" "Volume of the cube: side x side x3.14" "Don't be stupid !" "How are you behaving in Milan?" "Don't worry, we are behaving good. they already arrested us twice." "Can't you be serious?" "What are you doing tonight?" "Don't worry." "Now we are going to relax a bit in the Hotel" "Yes, and then we go eat, and straight to sleep. because tomorrow we have the train very early" "Okay." "No, it's not need." "I'll tell him." "Ciao" "Ready Sweety?" " She drop it..." "Ready?" "How stupid ?" "!" " What can you do?" "Shall we talk now with the Mrs?" " let's go" "Mrs?" "Good evening" " Hello" "Can we get inside?" "At this time?" "Yeah, i know... but we lost the address..." "But we really care to pay the ticket... how much is it?" "You don't pay entrance. there is the "drink card"." "the drin...?" " drink card" "So you don't pay..." " Only the drink" "It will mean free in English..." "Driiin card...." " Thank you they were honest..." "Why did you let them in?" "It's too early!" "If they are happy..." "To be beautiful... it is." "Unfortunately it's late, because i told you... the go sleeping early, because the day after they work... anyway" "Stop it with your hand!" "I don't like this thing here, it is ugly" "It's the brand pal, it's cool..." "When you have the brand on your shirt, do you walk with the hand like that?" "It doesn't matter, it's a matter of tastes" "The first thing female look is the here. to see how much do you spend trust me, it's perfect i wish i had it..." "C'mon let's go to the bar" "Good evening good evening" "What do you want?" "I don't know, the same as you." "Then let's take two "Nigers"" "50 Euro" "50 Euro each?" "25 each sure, because.... but i don't... "Nigers"..." "Two cokes and rhum?" "One coke and rhum 50" "A beer?" "always 50..." "Well, maybe we have a look around." "because this is the first bar we visit..." "Let's see around...." ""see you later"" "But you are sleeping..." "I know, but Disco kill me..." "I see, but this way i get bored alone..." "We came later pal, this is the truth" "Let's leave." "But we had fun..." "Yes, but let's leave." "This way we let them close the place." "The also deserve to sleep" "Good evening" " Please..." "Good night, we are leaving. we had a lot of fun..." "This Disco is really nice" " Amazing - we really like it" "But we are leaving because is late." "and let you free to rest." "We will not miss another time" "Here is the Drink card clean, so we are done." "Are you pulling my leg?" "Are you pulling his leg pal?" "you know i don't like it..." "Definitely not, i would never." "calm, calm, calm... what is happening?" "It happen that you must pay 50 Euro each, one drink is compulsory." "sooo.... first of all, keep it civil..." "What you do otherwise?" " I don't know what i do, but i'll do something go home, poor man poor me to me?" "Stop !" "listen, listen, you have a man between your hands" "Pal, help him because i will hurt him!" "help him!" "Help Help!" "I'll kill you" "Good pal, keep going" "Who are these people, what planet are they from?" "They are all getting inside now!" "Let me go" "It's my cousin and my uncle don't want her to stay alone." "Here, second wagon" "You stay here, i'll take care of these two." "C'mon let's go" "Good morning" "Sit, these are you seats" "Mr Detective..." " Silence, silence" "Stop it ?" "!" "Who told you to sit?" "Sit" "Don't try to be smart, because i won't move from here until the train leave." "Because finaly you..." "Sleep?" " paid?" "Leave!" "You see, this was easy..." "Life is a jungle." "Life is a jungle" "I had the brand here, and they tear it apart but what do you want to know..." "I'm so sleepy" "Lucky you that are sleepy, i'm still nervous..." "That one!" "if they didn't pull him away, i was going to bite his head off because.. he was already... all the... taking him..." "Quiet, stop it, silence, stop it" "He is terrible... more than previous convitions..." "Stop it stop it" "Do you mind if i take off the shoes?" "Please, do you as wish..." "Please, no problem." "No because sometime I...." "It's normal in Milan to have hundred girls, hundred different stories..." "Maybe it's because they work and are stressed..." "They are horny..." "How do they show you?" "Are they taking the first step?" "You are walking in the Disco and they touch your ass." "But this is too easy" "There isn't any pleasure of conquering" "See us for example." "In two days, how many girls did we have?" "Four" "In two?" "Each!" "Yes, 4 each." "Yes, you have sex, sex, sex... sex..." "But what is left after?" " nothing" "This is the difference: in Milan males are prey while in Sicily, we are hunters" "Excuse me for a minute." "You two, come with me." "I must talk to you" "How many night have you been missing?" "We... three, why?" "No one ring me for 3 nights so, given that i'm not stupid as someone think" "I understood who torture me" "Who is it?" "Him !" "Ciccio Candela "The single" "He was ill in the bed for 3 days, and no one rang me for 3 days." "Gino, Stop it!" "Even we could have been..." " Sure" "C'mon boys." "You are joking, but this is serious for me" "He never forgive me because i have a family, while her remained single" "But tonight I screw him." "Come with me, i'll show you something" "Rosina, i'll be away for a minute!" "come with me..." "This one cover the door 24 hours a day." "It's connected with a screen, close to my bed, and a recorder so, even if I fell asleep..." "So, for example, here i'm seen?" " Yes" "And here Gino?" " Too" "Where does it end the view, Gino?" "Here" "So, someone here is not seen, right?" "No, but how long should his arms?" "unless he ring with the horns..." "Unless he ring with the horns..." "He can never make it..." "The Spring pass slowly" "And the Summer bring us the political campaing to elect the new Mayor of Cardaci and it's a challenge to death" "Because it's time to end with this administration that after making you believe of bring novelty stole everything they could destorying the land, making compromises with the Mafia" "I can read in your eyes that Sicily is ready for changing and it's your duty, dear friends and citizens to give a clear and strong signal" "Look this virgin mountains!" "They are waiting for our dream." "what is the dream?" "We dream of Cardaci as a skiing resort!" "a skiing resort with hotels, restaurants and chalets in one word:" "Work for everybody!" "But someone might say" ""It's three years that doesn't rain in Cardaci"" "well, i answer:" "we need 5... just 5... snow cannons and we will make of Cardaci the Sicilian's Cortina and when the snow will melt in spring because I promise, in spring, I will make the snow melt!" "we will solve also the problem of the drought" "Three, Two, One" "Go go go" "Bastard!" "Hell, this time i fuck you!" "Bring the record back Rosina, so we can see who is it..." "Here you don't see anybody" "How you don't see anybody?" "Show it to me" "Pamphlets, posters, dinners, everything for the political campaign." "But not everybody low himself to this things" "The important people use just signs, subtles, but efficients" "In short, doesn't fall leaf..." "News from the snow." "That idiot of pretender Mayor, say that we need just 3 snow cannons" "Andnowtheweatherforecasting continue the muggy weather all over Sicily  due to the strong Scirocco (Ndr:" "South-Est wind) even today the max temperature will be around 40 degrees numerous the calls to firemen that worked till night to fight the flames" "... Nothing" "Good day to everyone" "Again?" "I already told you that now there are 4 cameras" "One show the bell and the door" "One the street, One the road and this one has a general point of view" "and now, he also reduced the walking time from the bedroom to the balcony" "Because it's not 24 seconds anymore" "He is pulling down the walls of the living and dining rooms to avoid two corners" "This man is giving us an hard time..." "We would need a stick like... spiral..." "That reach the bell, and avoid the cameras" "But are 4 the cameras, you need a tunnel..." "This man is thinking everything..." "Good morning ma'am" " Good morning" "There is a mail" " Yes, thank you" "I have an idea, but..." "Which?" "A radio controlled airplane a radio controlled airplane?" "Pal, if we can build a lane..." "Salvo" "Salvo, this mail is for you maybe is the answer from the examination in Milan" "Ok, and so... and so what?" "don't you want to open it?" "Ok mom, we will open it later in this moment we are studying, we are doing something else what are you saying?" "do you want me to be on pins and needles?" "Why do you deceive yourself, that then you are deluded" "C'mon Salvo open it, do that for your mother." "Maybe it's the right time." "Ok i'll do that for you. even if you will be deluded, i know you..." "It's a jungle Ma'am. we are fighting all the day..." "Here it is object, ministerial examination... etc etc regarding you partecipation... etc etc ministerial examination... etc etc" "Librarian..." "Milan... etc etc we comunicate that you result you result?" "Result?" "how do you result?" "Accepted" "Bravo, my son" "I was feeling it, i'm so happy, my son thank you lord!" "Congratulations!" "We did it!" "You did it, my male" "Hi, ma'am, it's Salvo, is Valentino there?" "thank" "Hey, Vale, did you get the mail too?" "I see, you got it." "Did Sandra remember about the marriage promise?" "got it, she remembered" "If it's Salvo tell him to call Loredana" "Loredana, it's Sandra at the phone" "Yes?" " Loredana, did you heard the good news?" "Maybe they wanted to reward the creativity of our answers they could have send a mail of compliments not like that, sending us to work" "And who go now to the Bar?" "no one?" "!" "This mean don't respecting our region" "This is putting on his knees the economy of a region because ours is an economy based on the Bar" "and this thing of you and me in Milan don't tell anything." "Now with Sandra we don't talk anything but marriage, marriage, marriage..." "Don't make me think about it..." "Why?" "what it's you problem?" "Nothing. thanks to you that promise Sandra to marry her, now i have Loredana stressing me and so?" "i don't get it and so i had to promise to marry her as well." "and when did you promise her?" "what day is today?" "Monday 3 months ago, when you promise as well" "What what what pal?" "It's 3 months that you are making me crazy about me carrying the skirt and you you are a" "Then i'll tell you." "I didn't want to go to Milan." "I wanted to go to Venice" "You cannot drive a Gondola with this build" "Why what build do i have?" "build for skirt!" "tomorrow morning at 10 there will be a demostration this snow removal is a hand to the future vote, and make others vote Valvo and the snow will change our lifes what did we smoke?" "Ciccio. come to sleep. it's late what are you doing out there?" "Stop with these sigarettes there must be something we can do" "I still have an idea..." "Please, the attorney is waiting" "so... tell me" "So... we are Ficarra and Picone first of all, good morning. we came here 20 days ago regarding that story of the examination" "Sorry" "Ready?" "yes, we appeal it" "Ok, do you prepare it?" "fine where you saying?" "so, we came here to oppose to the results of the examination" "Yes?" "How much time i didn't hear you.." "Yes" "Yes, anyway there is also the supreme court all right." "Sorry again" "So.." "Then.. when we came we ask if it was possible to make a complain about the examination" "Excuse me" "Yes, tell him i'm not here" "I think it's the word examination don't try to use it again" "Tell him that i had to leave and i'll stay away for 2 days" "So..." "We did, a lot of time ago an application for... an application and we get the result of the... like in the official paper of the... in the official paper and i didn't say it. and it know that... now, when we get the answer" "that we really didn't expected that we didn't expect. and i can swear on my sons that i still don't have but in the future... and anyway it don't care and now, we don't like the result of the... of the test. yes. of the proof" "So.. an examination" "Exactly, of the examination" "I apologize" "Yes, we will challenge the trial smoothly all right" "sorry. i remember perfectly" "Miss, bring the papers about Ficarra and Picone all right" "Examination" " Excuse me" "Please please..." "Loan request" "Well, now I can only wish you luck" "Thank you" " So it's done?" "Yes it's done. congratulations and see you soon." "Thank you" " Goodbye" "Here are the papers" " Thank you" "I definitely agree with you what happen is scandalous" "Shameful" "I told you. it was impossible" "With this exam as you sustain it" "I'm sure that we can have the result changed" "Are we really sure?" "are you joking?" "You listed in alphabetic order the names of all Ossianic poets" "What did we list?" "There was also a question about the plate tectonics that only a geologist could answer and did we know it?" "Sure. the tests are perfects" "Are you sure that this are ours?" "are you being modest?" "is it your signature?" "Yes is it your signature?" "all right" "only now i understand what you felt when you got to know that..." "Heck!" "You won!" "Music:" "Tinturia" " Luna" "If we want to make a good impression we must use the triptych of the triptychs" "The Tris Madam De Pompidu" "Wait" "A Tris of exceptional fish" "Covered of smoking hot cheese" "Then we move to the first plates the tris, Luis XXIII that bring us to the necessary and emotional moment of the tie cut and we move to the second of the seconds (plates)" "I'll go to the bath for a moment, dear a tris of meat, Salamon and the Queen of Saba" "A pig who will enter the room" "You are making a mess you are doing so you can clean afterward do you know that you are polite?" "do you want to teach me the politeness?" "what does it mean?" "Mean?" "it mean, that opposite to you" "I make conjecture, think, ponder and in the end, I understand!" "what did you understand?" "That was your mother-in-law to make us win the examination my mother-in-law?" "your mother-in-law, my dear because you told to the daughter that you would marry her, she spoke with the mother, and the mother did everything she could to make us win the examination even so?" "even so!" "even so!" "The invisible enemy" "Here is their problems" "Theirs hypotesis about the responsabiles" "Start to widen and include everybody from closer parents to far parents from friends to enemies" "All probable guilties" "And all with possible reasons until reaching... the most incredible hypotesis" "so you think that secret services are involved ?" "!" "of course Pal." "Two like us, that don't work and are happy are loose cannons for this society" "In fact, we are troubles" "Troubles?" "we are revolutionaries, like Che Guevara" "Who?" "Scechevara who is that?" "I don't know, someone who make shirts..." "This is why I told you that, if our line was accepted, it would have been the end of global economy" "They used every mean to stop us" "But who would have guess... my mother-in-law a secret agent... it was clear..." "I repeat it again." "You mother-in-law is able to do:" "Goulash, Sacher cake and Polenta" "Three foreign recipes" "How would she know that is 40 years she don't move from home?" "!" "So in you opinion all secret agents know foreign recipes?" "sure, because they travel sorry, but you told that my mother-in-law never move from home..." "I don't know." "I said it clear before" "You cannot ask me to repeat it..." "Palermo defeated with a definitive 3-0 the Hamburg and see now the open doors for the European final" "We now move to the lottery extraction" "Milan:17..." "Here it is" "Two double big coffe" "For the heros that conquered Milan" "Guys, it's while that I see you tired." "What do you do during the night?" "We study" "For the examination?" "didn't you already win it?" "and we want to over-win..." "I reach the conlusion... that who ring my the night, are professionals" "Professionals who came from Palermo but the person behind is always that bastard of Ciccio Candela" "He don't deserve to be on my board" "I took out his picture" "You did well Gino, you did well" "Salvo" "This is the Commendatore Di Fatta" "Valentino Picone and Salvo Ficarra" "It was a recommendation and this one is the judge of the examination" "a signature here, and another here" "He make us sign twice!" "This one, has been delivered this morning from the Di Blasi's cakeshop" "They say that has been sended by Mr. Milazzo" "He ask if you could kinldy give it to a friend that live in Milan" "Fuck!" "Don Ciccio" "I'm telling you that the horses will be delivered tomorrow morning" "Not decapitated!" "delivered!" "Tomorrow" "No no no, regarding your friend, take it easy" "He is already mayor rather, do you know what i say?" "one minute..." "Mastricano." "I told you that I didn't want to be disturbed" "I apologize Don Ciccio." "I tried to explain that it wasn't possible... but they are insisting" ""They" who?" "Mastricano. go out. please. and close the door" "Don Ciccio." "Why?" "because then... i'll tell you a story about when i was small. a boy." "Don Ciccio." "Why?" "because then... it's better... that we speak clearly" "There isn't respect anymore and even this kids. this modern youngster" "Watch your face. and laugh." "They don't know who you are. who you were." "And if they know. they don't give a shit." "Don Ciccio." "Why?" "Are you headstrong?" "Then, we are not speaking the same language" "Are you still like that?" "It's late!" "My mother is waiting, we must bring her to the cemetery and then we must also go to the aunt." "And look how much you smoke!" "Do I have the emphysema?" "!" "Next time you cry during the night for the cough" "I'll make you swallow the cigarettes and what is it that stupid face?" "Good morning Ma'am" "Sorry" "Take your time dear" "I'll solve it on my own" "That it's" "The life... that you two always dreamed" "I dreamed it before" "Free. like the air" "Like birds" "Without problems. without work and especially, without one woman" "That count your steps" "That yell at you" "I dream that life and you will dream it as well" "Go out!" "Shout it" "Don Ciccio is envious of two loosers" "but..." "I cannot do anything now" "If you want to ask me..." "Something" "I... can help you... even, as if..." "It is my presence..." "let's say... for the wedding" "Who so?" "I'm talking and you leave?" "Is it politeness?" "I'm talking and you leave" "and you even close the door" "Fuck!" "the phone" "Ready?" "No i'm talking with friends" "No... we speak tomorrow without doubt... no it's nothing" "It's everything quiet" "Nothing changed..." "Leave the..." "Leave the world as it is" "Please" "And is with great pleasure" "That I toast to Toni and Tania" "That finally, after many years" "Find the courage" "To put away their problems" "And to start again" "About it..." "I want to have a nice toast" "A toast to the freedom I lost." "But i'm happy to have lost." "What does it mean?" "How what does it mean?" "!" "I was joking..." "You know what?" "keep your freedom for yourself" "No, Tania!" "Tania... what did i say?" "Here, with this one it's 13" "Lucky you, that don't have this kind of problem anymore about it, I took the rings" "But tomorrow you should came to try them" "Yes, but it's the last though. we have other things to do" "We still have time" "It's everything ready" "Only if the city hall burn, you won't marry..." "Ouh, Look there!" "Go." "First the hand and then the feet" "Grasp !" "Grasp the window !" "I got it. wait a minute." "Quiet" "Fast" "Fall." "Fall, i'll wait you here" "Salvo." "Do something because we have no hurry..." "Take your time...." "Sorry" "Make yourself light" "I'll open you the door. see you there" "The tanks!" "Fuck pal." "We don't see anything" "Here we don't see anything" "You could have bring a flash light" "You have a light and you don't tell me anything?" "why..." "Easy..." "I didn't bring the light..." "Loredana !" " Sandra !" "What are you doing here?" "What are we doing in here?" " Nothing dear... in practice..." "Salvo was looking for Loredana" "Exactly." "I asked where Loredana could be." "I was worried" "I was worried. and I asked where is Loredana?" "where is my love?" "They I said, let's go looking..." " In the city hall" "Bravo, because she has this bad habit..." "When she has one spare minute, she go to the city hall" "You have this bad habit... that when..." "What are those?" "This is cold Thè ... Peach taste" "Offered from a pitchman here..." "Nothing... pay 2 take 3" "Good..." "Valentino" "What are?" "Gasoline Cold" "Sure... iced..." "Guys stop. i must say something important because i cannot bear it" "I was thinking togheter with Salvo this thing" "This story of the work, of the examination, of the wedding" "I don't think that they are all connected" "It's not you fault, it's not your fault..." "Absolutely" " It's us that are not worth" "Exactly" " Vale let's say it..." "We sucks!" "We don't sucks..." "We don't sucks, but we like to stay with friends" "At the Bar, with Gino" "It's our nature" "I mean that we sucks, because we are not serious people" "We are a bit lazy..." "So Valentino thought this..." "Me?" "Couldn't we remain as we are?" "So to remain as you are, you wanted to burn the city hall" "Yes, but not because we don't love you. at least I love you Loredana" "Ouh what's that." "I love you too Sandra" "Sandra I love you too" "Ok, I see..." " Maybe they feel confused, clearly... maybe tomorrow morning, with a clear mind yes, you wake up, stand up, have a shave.. and everything..." "Sure, because also the girl, after the shave feel like another person... make it thinner also - yes yes" "So..." " So we are leaving" "What are you doing?" "Leave them alone. maybe we want to stay a bit longer" "Because the city hall is beautiful during the night. if you don't like it the night... anyway" "Ah, did you bring the tanks as well?" "No, I bring the lighter" "Who those belongs to then?" "Ours" "Maybe we should be clear as well" "Everything fall on you suddenly. and now we are confused" "Because we also want to have our life" "Exactly..." "Just our idea of life is different from yours" "While your were spending hours at the Bar, or ringing Gino's bell" "We save some money - and we loan more from the bank" "And now we want to open a business" "This is not the moment of being, the wife, the mother or the daughter-in-law of someone" "Wasn't it you to say let's marry, let's marry" "It's wasn't us to say it..." "We played our role" "This is what everybody expected from us" "Our relatives... you two..." "So, you don't love us anymore?" "Nooo, it's not this" "Just that?" "Just that?" "We love you too" "But..." "Guys do make that face" "These 4 tanks are the proofs that we all think the same way about weddings" "Then?" "What do we want to do?" "Oh Yes." "Salvo, Valentino, Loredana and Sandra took an hard decision" "Maybe the most brave." "Surely the most right at this point of their lifes" "The choice of not marrying anymore, and stay a bit away" "But today is a day of celebration for our town" "In fact we are all here, emotioned and happy well, maybe not all" "Two persons are missing" "The first one is Don Ciccio." "He disapper some day ago" "Some malicious say that he took a vacation at the Caribbeans" "Far from the wife, indefinitely" "The Alps-friendly mayor lost the elections" "For some he was a victim of a too much ambitious plan" "Other says that he was harmed from the absence of Don Ciccio" "About it, there is a curious coincidence" "The Milan's examination won from Salvo and Valentino" "Has been revoked" "Apparently, the Judges open an enquiry, based on a anonymous that called for Caribbeans" "So..." "Doesn't fall leaf..." "But the absence really unexplained is the one of Gino Passalacqua" "In nomine Pater, Filius et Spiritus santus" "Dear brothers and sisters" "We are here gathered" "Because today, ours Toni and Tania are marrying" "And now, let's start the ceremony" "Have you seen them?" " Yes I did, but pretends nothing happened" "Hey, see who it there ...They are watching us" "You'll tell me later" " Go" "We are leaving girls, bye" " Wait, why?" "Nice ceremony" "Yep" "I have fun, beside, how do you say..." "There isn't wedding where you laugh, and funeral where you cry" "So, guys, I heard that tomorrow night you have a football final" "Who?" "We?" "I have a strain on my arm..." "No way" "We don't do that anymore." "We changed" "No, because we are free and we thought about coming to see you" "Yes - and where were thinking... if you come, we could go eating something togheter later" "Guys is it all over?" "Gino go inside" "No, because..." " Gino, you make it" "You did it Gino. take the rice and go inside" "What is it Gino?" "It happen that..." " In our invitation there was another address" "It would have been a mistake" "No, it was that bastard of..." " Gino !" "we are in the church" "Ciccio Candela. he never stop to torture me" "Let's go. let's go" "so, do you agree?" "tomorrow dinner togheter?" "Yes - sure, so maybe we chat a bit" "The married" "So we reach the end of the story" "Everybody in the town is speaking about the missed wedding between Salvo and Valentino" "Everyone, in his house, made the most imaginative hypotesis" "The most likely has been discussed in the square during the night" "The most beautiful will reach the Gino's Bar" "Where they will became official" "After all, to tell a story you often leave the truth" "And you will forgive me, if I, somewhere exagerated" "I hope you liked this story" "A story I told you, with the only voice you could hear" "The one that I do not have" "Romeo, Romeo, the picture" "Pardon me, they are calling me" "Fast !" "come here!" "Ready?" "Stay still!" "Tania!" "what did i say?" "To my father Vincenzo Ficarra" "Did you finish to rest?" "C'mon, otherwise we will never finish." "We spend two hours for every thing" "No no, not that one." "Too light, someone darker" "This one is fine" "Now you can put the light one, so they alternate" "Fast. you still have to do these, then that, and then we are done" "Why do you leave the newspaper in the middle?" "they will blame us" "European Examinations" "Hey Pal" "European examinations" "I don't want to know anything Salvo" "No no no Stop it" " A pity..." "London" "Barcellona" "Wien" "Athens" "Cyprus" "Guys?" "how is going?" "Everything fine" " We are done" "Did they find it?" " Yes" "Pal, this time, I'll choose" "Amsterdam, the Venice of North" "Thank you for watching the movie." "I hope you like it :)" "and if you pass by Sicily, give me a call ;)"