"You know, when I first discovered the lump" "I just knew it was something, you know?" "Even though the doctor told me I had fibrous breasts." "Yeah, a double mastectomy later," "I learned how to trust my gut." "That's terrifying." "You know, it was really hard, you know." "I was sick as a dog." "But enough about me." "They lopped off my tits." "So what, right?" "Mm." "Do you want a showery or a bathy?" "Are you a showery or a bathy?" "I'm a showery." "I used to be a showery." "But I..." "I'm becoming a bathy." "Okay, um..." "Are you comfortable sharing a room?" "I am." "Yeah, I guess you could say I'm NATO." "What is NATO?" "Not Attached to Outcome." "Well, that's very pretty." "What is this?" "It's a bracelet." "Is that real turquoise?" "It is." "Thank you." "Here." "Want to spoon?" "Am I the spooner or the spoonee?" "You're the spoonee." "That's good." "You like to be spooned?" "I do." "Your heart's beating pretty fast." "Is this rude?" "No, it's good." "Trespassers." " Ha, ha." " Get in." "Come on, it's so warm." "You guys high?" "Not anymore." "Come in, come in, come in." "All right." "Ready?" " Fuck, that hurt!" " Did that hurt?" " Did it?" " Oh, my God!" "You guys think that the beginning of the end of the Pfeffermans was, like, the day we stopped swimming in this pool?" "There was an actual day?" "It was like a summer." "I remember that." "That was the summer I got my period." "And I was wearing maxi pads." "And I wanted to come in with you guys but I wouldn't." "And then, like, two months later, the, um... the, uh, pool guy quit." "Unrelated to your period." "Yes, unrelated to my period." "Why would it be related to my period?" "Sounded like it was related." "No." "It was a coincidence." "The pool guy quits." "Then the pool fills up with leaves, and goes fully leafy for two whole years." " Well..." " Because no one will scoop it." "Yeah, the bottom got all gray and green and brown." " And copper." " It was, like, slick." "You could slide on it." "Oh, my God, doesn't this feel amazing?" "I actually do feel like I kind of turned a corner out there in the woods." "I'm thinking that, I don't know, maybe I'm just gonna, like, look into religion," "God or get my goddess on." "No, seriously." "I'm actually thinking about, like, looking into Judaism more, and finding out, you know, my spiritual mojo." "Oh, Judaism." "Just, you know... you gotta promise me..." "What?" "What?" "No Raquel." "Not Raquel." "Guys." "Tea party." "Tea party, tea party, tea party." " Tea party." " Okay." "Ready?" "Ready?" "Ooh." " Vickie." " Yeah?" "I don't know what to do." "What would you like?" "I'm not sure." "You want to see me?" "What about this?" "On or off?" "Uh, off." " Off." "Okay." " No, no, no, no." " On." " Okay." "For now, on." "Yes." "Oh, God!" "My God!" "I love where the rock wall takes you." "You notice all the extra spaces." "You guys, I just realized that this is the first time that we're all single at the same time." "Since, like, I don't..." "Forever." "Oh, my God." " We should, uh..." " That's so weird." "We should all get married in a thrupple." "Incest is best, yo." "Will you help me take care of my kids?" " I could not have got a..." " a better space for myself." "I like this, too." "Who'd have thought of that?" "Sure, I mean, I really was feeling, like, one of the most important things that we could use this space for..." "Can I have this?" "Please." "I want to start doing work right now." "And all your medical books would be stored on the bookshelf." "In fact, there's a ton of storage space." "See, under... under here..." "Oh, I see that." "Right, so you have nice little storage area here in the ottoman." "Bring it inside." "Open up this big panel..." "I had this recurring dream that I have a finite amount of time." "It's like I have one hour, and in that hour I have to say goodbye to someone I love who is about to die, and I have to say it perfectly." "Because it's so important." "And every time I look at the clock, the clock ticks forward one more minute, and that is one minute that I have lost." "I don't even know who it is" "It might be my mom." "I have no idea." "What's she like?" " My mom?" " Yeah." "My mo..." "I haven't seen my mom in a while." "I mean, I'm embarrassed to say." "Go on, say." "I haven't seen my mom in three years." "Was it because she didn't support your transition or..." "No, it was different things." "I mean... she's never seen me... as Maura." "Would you come with me?" "To see my mom?" "I, uh..." "Going to see peoples' parents is just..." "It's too intimate." "I'm not..." "I'm not ready for that right now." "I get that." "I admire that." "Boundaries, right?" " Yep." " We need boundaries." "And you have some great boundaries." "They're hot." "You have hot boundaries." " Yeah." " It was iconic." "Yeah, it was bi..." "it was bionic." " Leslie:" "It's was bionic." " Fucking bionic, yeah." "It was, it was..." "Sprout." "Hey." "Howdy." "See you guys later." "Come on in." " You're late." " I'm sorry." "Drop your shit." "Get on your knees." "Pull that up." "This'll do." "Thanks." "Oh, hip." "Easier than dealing with cash." "Yeah, cash is so dirty." "See you next week, Sarah." "Okay." "Thanks, Pony." " Hey." " Hey, yourself." "Is my mom home?" "Oh, she's out getting a haircut." "Right." "Um, can I come in?" "Sure." "Yeah, so, um, it's official." "I am no longer a career undergrad." "Diploma's in the mail." "Well, that is tremendous." "That's great, sprout, I'm..." "I am..." "I'm proud of you." "Thank you." "It's kind of weird." "Big change." "Plus, I'm still recovering from Idyllwild." "Is that normal?" "Uh, well, you know, it kind of depends on the year." "I mean, sometimes the Idyllwild hangover can take a few days, and sometimes it can take a few weeks, and then my Red Bull budget, man, just goes right... right through the roof." "Is Maura okay?" "I don't know." "I think she will be." " But..." " Yeah?" "Yeah, I just, I guess..." "Wish I'd known." "You know?" "About the divisiveness in that whole community." "Yeah, well, I..." "I would have told you if..." "if you'd told me that night you were bringing her." "Yeah." "But it actually kind of relates to what I've been thinking about, you know, this whole pain and anxiety that's just been passed down through the generations, and not just the Holocaust, or the pogroms or the Jew shoes," "it's just sort of more like, uh... like metaphorical Holocaust." " It's..." " Ali." "You don't have to perform for me." "I'm..." "I'm not, I didn't..." "I didn't know that I was." "Just be yourself." "Okay." "I want you to be one of my TAs next year." "Oh, my God, really?" "Thank you." "That's great." "That's great." "Um, but let me just..." "Let me just toss an idea at you." " Okay." " Okay?" "You and I, we... we really... we had some fun at the fest." "Did we not?" "Mm-hm." "Yes, we did." "I..." "I didn't know if we were gonna bring that up." " It's up." " Okay." "Honestly, you are... you're..." "you're someone that I would really like to take my time with." "I would really... like to take my time getting to know." "But it's against the faculty code of conduct for professors to fuck students." "Mm." "Even their grad students." "Even grad students." "So, take your pick." "You want to be my student, or you want to be my old lady?" "Band's good." "Really good." "Goin' on tour." "Eight different cities." "You learn more by traveling with somebody for two days than you do knowing them for two years." "Um, what about you and Mom?" "You guys seem to be getting pretty close pretty quick." "That's true." "You okay with that?" "Of course." "I mean..." "I think so." "I mean, is it..." "It's not really my business, right?" "Yeah, it is." "It's important to me what you think." "What was that?" "I don't know." "Is that a goose?" "It's a duck." "Uh, hang on." "Take your jacket off." "Yeah, take it off." " Shh, shh." " Why?" "Hold it out like a shock blanket." "Like..." "like in front of you." "Hold it out." "Stretch it out in front of you." "Like this?" "Good, yeah, now you're gonna wrap it around him so he can't flap his wings so he doesn't hurt himself, okay?" " Okay." " Easy." " You want me to carry him?" " Yeah, yeah." "Yeah, yeah, that's good." "Okay, let's get him out of here." "Keep him safe." "Okay." "I'm really sorry." "I'm sorry, um..." "I'm really sorry." "What are you sorry about?" "I'm sorry about the weekend." "I wouldn't have brought you if I'd known." "I..." "I think I might study." "With Leslie in the Fall." "Oh." "You know, I don't know Leslie, and I don't know the people in the Gender Studies program, but I suggest, uh, it's always wise to steer clear of people who are overly attached to dogma." "But that's... that's me." "Okay." "You okay?" "I'm nervous." "How do I look?" "Pretty." "Deep breaths." "Yep." "Rose Pfefferman." " Okay?" " Yeah." "Okay." "Mom." "Hi, Mom." "It's Morty." "They call me..." "They call me Maura now." "Maura." "Hi, Mom." "You know Ali." "Hey, Bri." "1139 Soto." "1139 Soto." "1139 Soto." "1139..." "There it is." " Sure you want to go in?" " Yeah." "He might be paralyzed, he might be crippled." "He better be fucking crippled." "Oh." "How do I look?" " You look pretty." " No, I don't." " Yes, you do." " No, I don't." "Stop it." "Yes, I am..." "I'm looking for Chaim." "Who are you?" "I am his wife." "This is his daughter." "Who are you?" " Chaim." " You are also his wife?" "Hi, baby, you made it." "On our own we made it." "No thanks to you." "You're lucky we found you." "We had no idea how to find you." "Well, I gave your mama my address." "You lie to her." "You lie to her!" "She still loves you." "Don't lie." " Where's Gershon?" " He stayed behind." "He stayed be..." "What you couldn't get him a visa?" "What, you can't..." "You can't nothing him." "You couldn't get him a visa?" "You can't any..." "Who is this, huh?" "Who are they?" " Muriel." " Muriel, did you know that he promised to find us a home?" "Hm?" "To send for us?" "Rosie, I am still your tate." "I will always be your father." "You like books, right?" "There's a book store." "I'll buy you a book." "Hm?" "Huh?" "Yeah?" "About a knight, hm?" "Or about, uh, what, what?" "Sewing?" "Hm?" "France?" "Huh?" "I just don't want you to look at me the way you're looking at me right now." "Can you... can you not..." "Can you look away?" "Rosie, please." "Please?" "Can you look away?" "Stop looking at me the way you're looking at me right now." " It's okay, it's all right." " Can you look away?" " Yes, come in." " Hello?" "Where..." "What are you doin'?" " What are you doing?" " I'm..." "I'm sorry." "I'm a little late." "You're not a little late, you're a lot late." "I was on the 405, there was an accident." "What can I tell ya?" "My meetings got pushed, so it's no big deal." "Perfect." "I finally sold that Creative Campus on Skid Row." "Oh." "Good for you." "Gentrification wins again." " What are these chairs?" " We just got these." "They're so low." "I mean, look." "That's the idea." " Well, they're designed..." " They're terrible." "No, it's a specific thought in mind to make..." "This Melanie's idea?" "It was one of her ideas." "I got something." "This is why I'm here." "I present... restitution." "What is it?" "This is a $485 color palette." " I knew it was you." " Okay." " I knew it was you." " Well, anyway," " I'm sorry." " You're so stupid." "It was an accident, though." "Like, I didn't mean to take it." "I was just admiring it, and then it fell..." "Anyway, I'm sorry." "Well, did you get a gift receipt?" "Why?" "Melanie, uh..." "Ditched me." "What do you mean?" "She's, like, gone?" "She said something about she thought that she rushed into this relationship, or that I might just be too boring for her." "What?" "What a bitch." "You're not boring." " It's just a bummer." " It's like..." "Well, I'm sorry." "Nothing's adding up." "It's like I thought stuff would add up by now, but it's like everything's slipping through." "Can I say something?" "Yeah." "Well, it... it seems pretty clear to me that, uh... you're in shock." " I am?" " Yeah." "About what?" "Well, lots of things, but mostly I'd say the loss of your father." "What do you mean?" "Joshua, your father died." "I mean, I see Mop all the time." "You know." "I mean, when somebody dies, you can't really see them, so..." "Maura is not Mort." "Yeah, but I..." "I did not like him." "So?" "Why, you think I still miss Mort?" "What do you think?" "Well, it's like politically incorrect to say that you miss someone who has transitioned, so..." "This isn't about correct." "Joshua, this is..." "This is about grieving." "Mourning." "Have you grieved and mourned the loss of your father?" "Him?" "Like losing him?" "No, I'm..." "I don't know how to do that." "That's okay." " Hi." " Hi." "Hi." "Hi." "Do you have a minute?" "That's it, push." "It's taking too long." "It's taking too long." "I think something's wrong." "Nothing's wrong, Yetta." "Give it a second." "Doctors these days, they know what they're doing." "She doesn't even have a name." "Rosie doesn't even have a name." "I picked out a name." "There's nothin' to worry about." "I'm gonna call her Fay." "Fay?" "Fuh!" " You don't like Fay?" " Fay Pfefferman." "Fay Pfefferman." "It sounds like a movie star." "What makes you so sure it's a girl, huh?" "Well, a father knows these things." "That's it." "Congratulations, it's a boy."