"Sam:" "You think Adam's okay?" "Adam:" "No!" "No!" "Dean!" "Dean:" "Doubt it." "Cass either." "[grunts] [all screaming]" "The cage you sprung Lucifer from... you can shove his ass back in." "The key to the cage..." "four rings from The Horsemen." "Dean:" "Well, we got War's." "We nicked Famine's." "That's two rings down." "Collect all four." "Crowley:" "I can give you Pestilence." "Do you want The Horsemen ring's or not?" "What are we dealing with?" "Do you know?" "Sam:" "Croatoan." "It's a virus of Plague and Pestilence." "More like demonic germ warfare." "They want our vaccine." "They need our vaccine." "It's called "demand," people." "Now, supply!" "Sir, great news." "The vaccine trials..." "the results have been... [chuckles] really quite grotesque." "I think you'll be pleased." "Oh, hello, Death." "You make a wish." "I can give you anything you want, mate." "Up to and including Death's coordinates." "All I need is..." "Bobby:" "My soul." "Say we can open the cage." "But then what?" "What if you guys lead the devil to the edge and I jump in?" "Dr. Green, how was your trip?" "Oh, very productive." "And how are we tonight, Celeste, my favorite patient?" "The nurse says you can't sleep." "Oh, I just feel worse and worse." "Well, that's because you're suffering from a combination of the common cold..." "Dengue fever... and a nasty, nasty case of Japanese encephalitis." "What are you... [chuckling] I'm sorry." "I..." "Oh, you heard me." "Oh, and look at that." "You never had chicken-pox as a child." "Oh, this is gonna be fascinating." "[weakly] But I..." "h-how could I..." "Have all those diseases at once?" "Well, it's a proprietary blend." "I mix it up in a petri dish." "The petri dish being... you." "[gasps]" "Try and relax." "It'll be all right." "Are you... gonna c-cure me?" "No." "You're going to die." "In four, three..." "[coughing]" "Two..." "[gags]" "Interesting." "Season 5 Episode 21 "Two Minutes to Midnight"" "Dean:" "What the hell is wrong with you?" " Sam:" "Dean..." " Dean:" "No, don't "Dean" me." "I mean, you... you have had some stupid ideas in the past, but this..." "Did you know about this?" " What." " About Sam's genius plan to say yes to the Devil?" "Well, thanks for the heads up!" "Hey, this ain't about me." "You can't do this." "That's the consensus." "All right." "Awesome." "Then, end of discussion." "[cellphone rings] [sighs]" "This isn't over." "Hello?" " Dean?" " Cass?" "Is he okay?" "We all thought you were Dead." "Where the hell are you, man?" "A hospital." "Are you okay?" "No." "You want to elaborate?" "I just woke up here." "The doctors were fairly surprised." "They thought I was brain-dead." "S-so, a hospital?" "Apparently, after Van Nuys..." "I suddenly appeared, bloody and unconscious, on a shrimping boat off Delacroix." "I'm told it upset the sailors." "Uh, well, I got to tell you, man... you're just in time." "We figured out a way to pop Satan's box." "[weakly] How?" "It's a long story, but, look..." "[grunts]" "We're going after Pestilence now." "So if you want to zap over here..." "I can't "zap" anywhere." "What do you mean?" "You could say my batteries are... are drained." "What do you mean, you're out of angel mojo?" "I'm saying that I am thirsty and my head aches." "I have a bug bite that itches no matter how much I scratch it, and I'm saying that I'm just incredibly... [chuckles]" "Human." "[sighs]" "Wow." "Sorry." "Well, my point is..." "I can't go anywhere without money for... an airplane ride." "And food." "And more pain medication, ideally." "All right." "Well, look, no worries." "Uh, Bobby's here." "He'll wire you the cash." " Dean, wait." " Bobby:" "I will?" "You said "no" to Michael." "I owe you an apology." "Cass..." "I-it's okay." "You are not the burnt and broken shell of a man that I believed you to be." "Thank you." "I appreciate that." "You're welcome." "[receiver clicks]" "Be careful." "[engine turns over]" "So this is Dr. Evil's lair, huh?" "[sighs]" "It's kind of more depressing than evil." "It's like a four-color brochure for dying young." "Of course, to Pestilence, it's probably dolly-wood in there." "[scoffs] Great." "A whole building full of people." "We don't know who's human, who's demon, and who's Pestilence." "So what do we do?" "Hang on." "[door opens]" "Hey." "Hi." "Uh, I'm looking for my Nana." "Uh, her name is Eunice Kennedy." "Go around front and see the nurse." "You mind just helping me out, sir?" "Uh, she's about, uh, about that small and gray hair, wears diapers." "Dean: [grunts]" "Eunice Kennedy?" "That's the beauty about improv, Sammy." "You never know what's gonna come out of your mouth." "[both chuckle]" "So, what are..." "Hey." "What are we even looking for?" "Well, he's Pestilence, so he probably looks sick." "Everybody looks sick." "[groans]" "Hey." "Oh, now we're talking." "Dr. Green, how was your trip?" "Oh, very productive." "And how are we tonight, Celeste, my favorite patient?" "[elevator bell dings]" "Nurse:" "Sir... the Winchesters are here." "We should go." "[chuckles]" "Are you kidding me?" "They have a track record with Horsemen." "You mean my brothers." "What they did to my brothers." "No." "The only reasonable thing to do here is to... take it out of their healthy young asses." "We're under strict orders not to kill the vessels." "Oh, if Satan wants them so bad, he can glue them back together!" "Come." "Come." "Now then." " Page me if she's dying." " Yes, Doctor." "[coughing, gagging]" "[choking]" "[wind howling]" "[coughing] [coughing]" "[both coughing, gagging]" "Ugh..." "Must be getting close." "You think?" "Dean?" "[coughing] Get up." "The doctor will see you now." "Sam." "Dean." "Come right in." "[coughing] [coughing, gasping]" "Hmm." "You boys don't look well." "It might be the, uh, Scarlet fever." "Or, uh, the meningitis." "Oh!" "[chuckles]" "Or the syphilis." "[clicks tongue] [groans]" "That's no fun." "[grunts]" "However you feel right now?" "It's gonna get so very, very much worse." "Questions?" "[grunts]" "Disease gets a bad rap, don't you think?" "For being filthy, chaotic." "Uh, but, really, t-that just describes people who get sick." "Disease itself... very... pure... single-minded." "Bacteria have one purpose..." "divide and conquer." "[bones crunching] [grunting]" "That's why, in the end... it always wins." "[sighs]" "So, you've got to wonder why God pours all his love into something so messy... and weak." "[groans]" "It's ridiculous." "All I can do is show him he's wrong." "One epidemic at a time." "Now... on a scale of 1 to 10, how's your pain?" "Dean:" "Cass." "How'd you get here?" "I took a bus." "Don't worry, I... [coughing, gagging]" "Well, look at that." "An occupied vessel, but powerless." "Oh, that's fascinating." "There's not a speck of angel in you, is there?" "Oh!" "Maybe just a speck." "[screaming] [screaming]" "[knife plunges, squishing] [moaning]" "It doesn't matter." "It's too late." "[sighs]" "Well, it's nice to actually score a home run for once, ain't it?" "What?" "Last thing Pestilence said." ""It's too late."" "He get specific?" "No." "We're just a little freaked out that he might have left a bomb somewhere." "So please tell us you have actual good news." "Chicago's about to be wiped off the map." "Storm of the millennium." "Sets off a daisy chain of natural disasters." "Three million people are gonna die." "Huh." "I don't understand your definition of good news." "Well..." "Death, The Horsemen..." "he's gonna be there." "And if we can stop him before he kick-starts this storm, get his ring back..." "Yeah, you make it sound so easy." "Hell, I'm just trying to put a spin on it." "Well..." "Bobby, h-how'd you put all this together, anyways?" "I had, you know... help." "[glass clinks]" "Don't be so modest." "I barely helped at all." "Hello, boys." "Pleasure, et cetera." "[sniffs]" "Go ahead." "Tell them." "There's no shame in it." "Bobby?" "Tell us what?" "World's gonna end." "Seems stupid to get all precious over one little... soul." "You sold your soul?" "Oh, more like pawned it." "I fully intend to give it back." "Well, then give it back!" " I will." " Now!" " Did you kiss him?" " Sam!" "Just wondering." "No!" "[clears throat]" "Why'd you take a picture?" "Why do you have to use tongue?" "All right." "You know what?" "I'm sick of this." "Give him his soul back now." " I'm sorry." "I can't." " Can't or won't?" "I won't, all right?" "It's insurance." " What are you talking about?" " You kill demons." "Gigantor over there has a temper issue about it." "But you won't kill me... as long as I have that soul in the deposit box." "You son of a bitch." "I'll return it." "After all this is over, and I can walk safely away." "Do we all understand each other?" "[sighs]" "Let me guess." "We're about to have a talk." "[chuckles]" "Look, Dean, um..." "[clears throat] for the record..." "I agree with you about me." "You think I'm too weak to take on Lucifer." "Well, so do I." "[chuckles]" "Believe me, I know exactly how screwed up I am." "You, Bobby, Cass..." "I'm the least of any of you." " Oh, Sam..." " No, it's true." "It is." "But..." "I'm also all we got." "If there was another way... [train whistle blows] but I don't think there is." "There's just me." "So I don't know what else to do." "Except just try to do what's got to be done." "Crowley:" "And... scene." "There's something you need to see." "Niveus pharmaceuticals is rushing delivery of its new swine-flu vaccine, to quote, "stem the tide of the unprecedented outbreak."" "Uh, shipments leave Wednesday." "Niveus pharmaceuticals." "Get it?" "[sighs]" "You two are lucky you have your looks." "Your demon lover, Brady?" "V.P. of distribution..." "Niveus." "Ah, yes, that the sound of the abacus clacking?" "We all caught up?" "So, Pestilence was spreading swine flu." "Yeah, but not just for giggles." "That was step one." "Step two is the vaccine." " And you think..." " I know." "I'll stake my reputation..." "That vaccine is chock-full of grade-A, farm-fresh Croatoan virus." "Simultaneous, countrywide distribution." "It's quite a plan." "They don't get to be Horsemen for nothing." "So, you boys better stock up on... well, everything." "This time next Thursday... we'll all be living in zombie-land." "[Jen Titus' "Oh, death" plays] [rhythmic humming]" "# oh, death # # oh, death # # oh, death # # won't you spare me over another year?" "# [rhythmic humming]" "# but what is this that I can't see # # with ice-cold hands taking hold of me?" "# [rhythmic humming]" "Watch where you're walking, pal." "# when God is gone and the devil takes hold # # who will have mercy on your soul?" "# # oh, death # # oh, death # [humming] # my name is death, and the end is here #" "What's your problem?" "This is what they mean by "the 11th hour," right?" "Pretty much." "Well, it's the 11th hour, and I am useless." "All I have is this." "What am I even supposed to do with it?" "Point it and shoot." "What I used to be..." "Are you really gonna bitch... to me?" "Quit pining for the varsity years... and load the damn truck." "Dean:" "All right, well... good luck stopping the whole zombie apocalypse." "Sam:" "Yeah." "Good luck killing Death." "Yeah." "[chuckles]" "Remember when we used to just..." "hunt Wendigos?" "How simple things were?" "Not really." "Well, um... you might need this." "Keep it." "Dean's covered." "Death's own." "Kills, golly, demons and angels and reapers and... rumor has it, the very thing itself." "How did you get that?" "Hello... king of the crossroads." "So, shall we?" "Bobby, you just gonna sit there?" "No, I'm gonna river-dance." "I suppose if you want to impress the ladies." "Bobby, Bobby, Bobby." "Really wasted that crossroads deal." "Fact... you get more if you phrase it properly." "So, I took the liberty of adding a teeny little sub-a-clause on your behalf." "What can I say?" "I'm an altruist." "Just gonna sit there?" "[breathes heavily]" "Son of a bitch." "Yes, I know." "Completely worth your soul." "I'm a hell of a guy." "Thanks." "This is getting maudlin." "Can we go?" "[car door opens] [car door closes]" ""Yes" to Lucifer, then jump in the hole." "It's an interesting plan." "[scoffs] That's a word for it." "Sam:" "So?" "Go ahead and tell me it's the worst plan you ever heard." "Of course." "I am happy to say that if that's what you want to hear." "But it's not what I think." "Really?" "You and Dean have a habit of exceeding my expectations." "He resisted Michael, maybe you could resist Lucifer" "But there are things that you would need to know." "Like?" "Michael has found another vessel." "What?" "It 's your brother, Adam." "You must have considered it." "We were trying not to." "Sam... if you say yes to Lucifer and then fail..." "This fight will happen." "And the collateral... it'll be immense." "There's also the demon blood." "What?" "What are you talking about?" "To take in Lucifer, it would be more than you've ever drunk." "But... why?" "It strengthens the vessel." "Keeps it from exploding." "But the guy he's in now... is drinking gallons." "And how is that not the worst plan you ever heard?" "[reverse alarm beeping]" "Yup, they're loading up hotshots of Croatoan in the trucks." "Okay." "First truck don't leave for an hour." "We get in, we plant the C-4 every 25 feet, then we pull the fire alarm." "That truck is leaving." "Balls!" "Okay, new plan." "[alarm beeps] [horn blaring]" "[electricity crackles]" "It's the Winchesters." "Well, then, let's bake them up a little treat." " Woman:" "Help!" " Side door!" "[knocking, banging]" " Get back." " Help me, please!" "Get back!" "[gunshot]" "Go." "Come on." "Go." "[indistinct grunting, thumping]" "[grunting, thumping continue]" "[gunshots]" "Woman:" "Help me!" "Please, help!" "There's still people here." "Sam, no!" "Wait here." "Damn." "Hey, let's stop for pizza." "Are you kidding?" "Just heard it was good, that's all." "Up ahead." "Big, ugly building." "Ground zero." "Horseman's stable, if you will." "He's in there." "How do you know?" "Have you met me?" "'Cause I know." "Also, the block is squirming with reapers." "I'll be right back." "Boy, is my face red." "Death's not in there." "You want to cut the cute and get to the part where you tell me where he is?" "Sorry." "I don't know." "Whoa, whoa, whoa." "Wait a minute." "You don't know?" "Signs pointed." "I-I'm just as shocked as you." "Bobby sold his soul for this!" "Relax." "All deals are soul back or store credit." "We'll catch Death in the next doomed city." "Millions, Crowley." "Millions of people are about to die any minute." "True." "So I strongly suggest we get out of here." "[thunder rumbles] [whimpering]" "[gunshot]" "You okay?" "Go!" "Go!" "[gun cocks] [gunshots]" "[electricity crackles] [groans]" "So, what?" "Call in a bomb threat?" "1,000 bomb threats?" "I men, how the hell am I supposed to get three million people out of Chicago in the next 10 minutes?" "Come on!" "What?" "I can't hear you!" "I said I found him." "Death..." "he's in there." "You coming or... not." "Go!" "Go!" "All clear." "Sam!" "[gun clicks]" "[gunshot] [gasping]" "Actually, these things can be useful." "Can we commit our act of domestic terrorism already?" "Let's go." "Thanks for returning that." "Join me, Dean." "The pizza's delicious." "Sit down." "Took you long enough to find me." "I've been wanting to talk to you." "I got to say..." "I have mixed feelings about that." "S-so is this the part where..." "[clears throat] where you kill me?" "You have an inflated sense of your importance." "To a thing like me, a thing like you, well... [slurps]" "think how you'd feel if a bacterium sat at your table and started to get snarky." "This is one little planet in one tiny solar system in a galaxy that's barely out of its diapers." "I'm old, Dean." "Very old." "So I invite you to contemplate how insignificant I find you." "[thunder crashes]" "Eat." "Good, isn't it?" "Well, I got to ask." "How old are you?" "As old as God." "Maybe older." "Neither of us can remember anymore." "Life, death, chicken, egg." "Regardless... at the end, I'll reap him, too." "God?" "You'll reap God?" "Oh, yes." "God will die too, Dean." "Well, this is way above my pay grade." "Just a bit." "So, then why am I still breathing... sitting here with you?" "Uh... w-what do you want?" "The leash around my neck... off." "Lucifer has me bound to him." "Some unseemly little spell." "He has me where he wants, when he wants." "That's why I couldn't go to you." "I had to wait for you to catch up." "He made me his weapon." "Hurricanes, floods, raising the dead." "I'm more powerful than you can process, and I'm enslaved to a bratty child having a tantrum." "And you think..." "I can unbind you?" "There's your ridiculous bravado again." "Of course you can't." "But you can help me take the bullets out of Lucifer's gun." "I understand you want this." "Yeah." "I'm inclined to give it to you." "To give it to me?" "That's what I said." "But what about..." "Chicago?" "[thunder crashes]" "I suppose it can stay." "I like the pizza." "There are conditions." "Okay." "Like?" "You have to do whatever it takes to put Lucifer in his cell." "Of course." "Whatever it takes." "That's the plan." "No." "No plan." "Not yet." "Your brother." "He's the one that can stop Lucifer." "The only one." "What, you think..." "I know." "So, I need a promise." "You're going to let your brother jump right into that fiery pit." "Well, do I have your word?" "Okay, yeah." "Yes." "That had better be "yes," Dean." "You know you can't cheat Death." "[thunder stops]" "Now, would you like the instruction manual?" "[crackling]" "Well, how'd it go at the Rockettes audition?" "Well, high kicks... fair." "Boobs need work." "I walked up and down stairs all night for no damn reason." "[laughing] I'm sore." "Feels so good, I'm scared it's a dream." "But then I remember that the world's dying bloody... so, drink?" "[bottle opens]" "Check it out." "[crackles]" "Hmm." "Oh." "So Death told you how to operate those?" "The whole deal?" "Yeah." "It's nuts." "Of course, I got bigger problems now." "Really?" "Like?" "[smacks lips]" "What do you think Death does to people who lie to his face?" " Nothing good." " Yeah." "What'd you say?" "That I was cool with Sam driving the bus on the whole Lucifer plan." "So death thinks Sam ought to say yes, huh?" "I don't know." "Yeah." "Hmm." "But, I mean..." "of course he'd say that." "He works for Lucifer." "Against his will, I thought he said." "Well, I'd say, take his sob story with a fat grain of salt." "I mean, he is Death." "Exactly, he's Death." "Think of the kind of bird's-eye view." "Seriously?" " I'm just saying..." " Well, don't." "I mean, what happened to you being against this?" "Look, I'm not saying Sam ain't an ass-full of character defects." " But..." " But what?" "[sighs]" "Back at Niveus..." "I watched that kid pull one civilian out after another." "He must have saved 10 people." "Never stopped." "Never slowed down." "We're hard on him, Dean." "We've always been." "But in the meantime... he's been running into burning buildings since he was... what, 12?" "Pretty much." "Look, Sam's got a... darkness in him." "I'm not saying he don't." "But he's got a hell of a lot of good in him, too." "I know." "Then you know Sam will beat the devil... or die trying." "That's the best we could ask for." "So I got to ask, Dean." "What exactly are you afraid of?" "Losing?" "Or losing your brother?" "Edited by Scooby"