" Permission to enter?" " Come." "Where's the rest of the company, captain?" "Where do you think?" "Moved out with the battalion." "I've been waiting here for you." " You took your time getting back." " I got lost in the smoke." "What happened to your gun?" "Have you ever seen a shell-shocked horse?" "He stomped all over me and got my rifle, knocked it to smithereens." "Well, I suppose horses have as much right to go crazy in this war as men have." "What do you think?" "What the hell is it?" "It's a "one." First Infantry Division." "The Red One." "You think General Pershing will like it?" " Oh, sure." " I got the idea from a cap of a Hun I killed." " When?" " Oh, about an hour ago." "Did he yell out anything?" "Well, the same old kaiser stuff, you know, "The war is over," all that junk." " Finish it." " Sir?" "Finish it." "The armistice was signed at 11:00 this morning." "The war's been over for four hours." "Well, you didn't know it was over." "He did." "A quarter of a century later, that piece of red cloth from the dead Hun's hat had become famous all over the world." "It was the insignia of the 1st Infantry Division." "The Fighting First, the Big Red One." "Twenty-four years later, the Big Red One was fighting the Krauts again." "It was World War II this time." "We were invading North Africa." "Hey, Griff." "Great!" "Thanks, sergeant." "We were his rifle squad." "First Squad, 1st Platoon, I Company, 16th Infantry." "He called us his wet-noses." "Griff, he was a hell of a sharpshooter." "Johnson was a pig farmer with hemorrhoids." "Vinci was a street kid who played hot jazz on the saxophone, and that's me, I'm Zab." "I thought I was the Hemingway of the Bronx." "You really a book writer?" " Yeah." " What book did you write?" "The Dark Deadline." " Never heard of it." " Never read it." "It's an unpublished mystery novel." "I left it with my mother." "Why's a book writer a rifleman?" "To come out with a war novel, meathead." "Why else, huh?" "What about you, Griff?" "You gonna be a cartoonist for a big newspaper or something?" "Say, Griff." "You do everything left-handed?" "Everything but shoot." "And play with my pecker." ""Watch out, Vichy." "Here comes the Big Red One."" "Vichy?" "I always thought Vichy was some kind of soda pop." "No." "Vichy's the French, fighting on Hitler's side." "Yeah, that's why we're wearing these so they don't shoot Americans, huh?" "We dropped leaflets so they know we're coming." "But if they start a fight, we'll have to kill them." "We were in this war to fight Germans, not Frenchmen." "We were kind of hoping they were feeling the same way." "Put your rubbers on and keep the salt water out." "Thanks, Griff." "I'll bet the guy that invented these never figured they'd be used on a rifle." " I never could screw with them." "How about you, Johnson?" "Not me." "Over on the Algerian beach, a lot of French soldiers were reading our leaflets and also wondering if they were gonna fight." "The colonel is stupid not to believe these leaflets." "We are no good." "You, me, all of us here." "Defending this miserable Algerian beach for Marshal Pétain and Adolf Hitler." "I can't kill an American." "There were four things you could hear on the boat:" "The waves, the engines an occasional muffled prayer and the sound of 50 guys all heaving their guts out." "French troops, don't shoot." "We are Americans." "Don't shoot." "We come to fight Hitler, not to fight with you." "Don't shoot." "Hold your fire!" " Yes, colonel." " Open fire." "Not on Americans." "Medic!" "Medic!" "Nail him, Griff!" "How the hell could you miss him?" "Hell, he was close enough to kiss on both cheeks." "What the hell's the matter with you?" "I never saw you miss." "Medic!" "Over here." "Sixteenth Infantry, hold your fire!" "Americans, this is Captain Chapier." "General Tavernier is dead." "Americans!" "I surrender my troops to your hands." "Frenchmen, we do not accept your surrender." "You surrender only to the enemy." "If you're Vichy, fight us." "If you're Frenchmen, join us!" "We were feeling cocky as hell." "Except Griff." "In the middle of the battle, he froze." "It got to Griff." "He kept away from the rest of us." "Nobody wanted to use the word "coward," not yet." "How come we're not pushing inland?" "Red Company's carrying the ball." "Take your malaria pills." "Smoky-smoky for zigzag." "Smoky-smoky for zigzag." "Bladder juice." " Jeez." " Not bad." "Hey, how come you never miss?" "They always take off backwards." "Smoky-smoky for zig-zig." "Smoky-smoky for girl." "And I'll bet you can get a whole harem here for a pack of smokes." "Girl." "Zig-zig." "Girl." "Zig-zig." "I wonder what they gave you in the other war not to get a hard-on?" "The same stuff you're wolfing down now." "It has saltpeter." "Griff's back." "I can't murder anybody." "We don't murder, we kill." "It's the same thing." "The hell it is, Griff." "You don't murder animals, you kill them." "The truth is, none of us had the faintest idea what war was all about." "I'll send your relief up in an hour." "I'm not gonna tell you again, no lights at night." "Third Squad lost five men." "I heard that they bury wounded men alive." " Know what else I heard?" " Tell it to the chaplain." "A lot of good he does if you're buried alive." "Well, maybe it'll do him some good, huh?" "Do you think Bedcheck Charlie's gonna tuck us in again tonight?" "Well, he's never on time." "But a couple of bombs and a little strafing good for you." "Keep you on your toes, keep you alert." "Hello, suckers of the Big Red One." "This is your German lovey-dovey bringing you the latest war news." "The Germans are in Moscow." "Don't look for the truck playing this record." "Seven Gls from the 34th Infantry tried it last night and they're deader than the Unknown Soldier in Washington, D.C." "Adolf Hitler has nothing against you American dogfaces." "I wonder what she looks like." "If she's half as good as she sounds, I'd eat her on sauerkraut." "You know Hitler's beef is with England." "Hey, how old do you think she is?" "I'll bet she's old enough to shove a swastika up her." "All those limeys hate your guts for licking them back in 1776." "Why fight for them?" "Knock off the bratwurst, Brunhilda." "And sing us a lullaby." "I'll get to the song in a minute, honey." "Now, news from the good old U.S.A." "The workers in the defense plants are striking for a raise in pay." "While you suckers are getting all of $10 a month extra for combat pay your wives, your sweethearts, are shacking up with draft dodgers and deserters." "You think of your women back home in the sack with these lucky, lucky 4-F's." "Zab." "Quit poking me with your rifle." "That's not my rifle, Johnson." "Sounds like we found the lost squad." "Where the hell's that radio?" " Where's the radio?" " Dead!" "Pull the squad back to those arches." "I'm gonna see what's on the left." "Chapier, blind that tank." "Get these horses out of here." "This is gonna blow." "Move out!" "Will you get them out?" "Get them out, get them out!" "This is gonna blow." "I never smoke them." "Lieutenant just got word from Battalion." "No more swapping smokes with the Goums for Kraut ears." "The Goums have been cutting off American ears." "Sergeant, my Goums never kill Americans." "I didn't say killing them." "I said, cutting their ears off." "But these are Kraut ears." "After a fight, you can't tell the difference between an American and a Kraut ear so there will be no more swapping cigarettes for any kind of an ear." "Not in my squad." "Communications Center caught an American bomb." "These wet-noses found the phonograph and one record undamaged." "Look at the faces of these puppies, Schroeder." "They think the Horst Wessel song is so..." "Horst Wessel was a pimp who supplied Hitler with baby faces like you." "He was killed in a brawl, over a whore in Berlin." "A poem by a pimp became the hymn of Hitler's party." "Is that right, Schroeder?" "Don't want to disillusion these infants, huh?" "You're getting soft." "Schroeder used to be tough." "In Libya, I saw him murder a German officer." "I didn't murder him, Gerd, I killed him when he ran from a fight with the British." "Murder." "Killed." "It's the same thing." "We don't murder the enemy, we kill." "Everything is on the move." "Battalion is sending us to the Kasserine Pass." " We're going to choke on panzer fumes." " Not me, Schroeder." "Let Rommel's panzer grenadiers march behind those tanks." "But not me." "I want no more." "I'm no damn Nazi fanatic like you." "Germany is through singing for Adolf Hitler." "Our brilliant generals had figured that Rommel's push would come at a place called Speava so they massed most of the Allied forces over there." "But they sent our regiment around the back way through a shit-hole called the Kasserine Pass." "Our squad was on point." "We got an eyeful, all right." "The whole damned Afrika Korps was coming through the Kasserine Pass." "Rommel had caught us with our pants down." "We got tanks, boys, and infantry with them." "They'll be looking behind the rocks for antitank guns, so let's go!" " Oh, shit." " Let's go." "Sergeant, where are we gonna run to?" "They'll spot us out in the open." " We're not running, we're digging in." " Digging in?" "Are you crazy, sergeant?" "All right." "Dig in and let them roll over our heads." "Hey, they're going off to the right!" "Guess again, jerk-off." "Look over there." "Tanks!" "They're all over the place!" "You are in a temporary German hospital in Tunis, sergeant." "The war is over for you." "We won." "You lost." "I speak good English." "Our doctors cannot understand what is keeping you alive." "How could such a decayed country like America produce such a magnificent soldier like you?" "You are a very beautiful man, sergeant." "I adore supermen." "I can understand your being horny, Fritz, but you've got bad breath." "We'd better get out of here." "You heard what that orderly said." "This is an unmarked hospital, and they'd just as soon blast us." "Anybody here from the Big Red One?" "Sixteenth." "Eighteenth!" "Where's that Big Red One man?" "What happened at the pass?" "You with the 16th?" "You one of them goons?" "I Company, 3rd Battalion." "What are you doing wrapped up in that Arab bed sheet?" " What happened at the pass?" " We counterattacked after you jokers ran." "We took Kasserine, Gafsa, El Guettar, Tunis." " We ran Rommel right out of Africa." " You mean the Big Red One took Tunis." "We sure as hell did." "This is Tunis." "You're right." "We took Tunis." "Where's the 1st Squad?" "Where's the 1st Squad?" "Out of the original 12-man rifle squad, the four of us were the only ones left." "This invasion wasn't gonna be like North Africa." "The beach would be heavily defended." "So now at least, we could all go to Sicily and get killed together." "I gave the supply officer a Luger for it." "By the way, what were you doing in that Arab bed sheet?" "They were shanghaiing all the combats and noncoms and training replacements for those rebel devils." "Where'd you steal it, stupe?" "My name's Shep, not "stupe." I got it from the St. George Hotel in Algiers." "I understand you're an Italian, Vinci." "How come they let a wop in this man's Army?" "I don't think a wop's gonna fight a wop." "I think all you'll do is drink dago red and sing "O Sole Mio."" "I like "O Sole Mio."" "The creepy thing about battle is that you always feel alone." "All you can see are the guys right next to you and the bodies you keep tripping over." "Sergeant!" " Sergeant!" " Ho!" " Throw me a hot one!" " I'm out of them!" "Johnson!" " Johnson!" " Ho!" " Throw me some live ones." " I'm out of them." " Zab." " Ho!" "Throw me live ones." "I'm out!" "Griff!" " Griff!" " Ho!" "Throw me live ones!" "I'm all out." "Hey, Shep, you got any grenades on you?" "Shep?" "Shep?" "Shep." "You chicken bastard." "Hey, Zab." "I got some live ones for you." " Johnson!" " Sergeant!" "Vinci!" "Give me another one!" "Zab!" " Johnson!" " Sergeant!" "Vinci!" "Why are we always sent out?" "It's the only damn squad in the whole U.S. Army?" " Where's the rest of the Army?" " There are eight patrols checking the villages for diehard snipers." "Anybody wants to transfer, just let me know." "I want to transfer." "Okay, Vinci." "You're transferred to the point." "You know how you smoke out a sniper?" "You send a guy out in the open and you see if he gets shot." "They thought that one up at West Point." " Are you okay, sergeant?" " Why?" " You just let Vinci walk into a sniper." " That's why he's here." "We got plenty of wet-noses here too." "You really want to finish that book, don't you?" "That's why I'm here." "Vinci made it." "Come on, Carlos, your turn." "Let's go." "Come on!" " Hey, Vinci?" " Ho!" "You know where he lives!" "Work to your right, I'll go left." "It's your ball." "Bravo!" "Bravo!" " You had him in the sights all the time." " All the time." "You just wanted to see me sweat." "It's punishment for transferring me to the point." "May I rejoin the rear echelon now?" "You are transferred back to the point." "Oh, my aching butt." "By now, we'd come to look at all replacements as dead men who temporarily had the use of their arms and legs." "They came and went so fast and so regular that sometimes we didn't even get to know their names." "Truth is, after a while we sort of avoided getting to know them." "I..." "I brought some water." "Do you know what they call you four guys down at Battalion?" "Sergeant's Four Horsemen." "I don't get it." "You guys lived through North Africa." "You didn't even get a scratch." "That's because replacements keep getting hit instead of us." "You think...?" "You think maybe I'll get it?" "Why not?" "You something special?" "I'll go get some, all right?" "I'll..." "Excuse me." "Water." "You'll live, Smitty." "You did tripwire the mine." "They're not designed to kill you, just to castrate you." "Castrate me?" "!" "Oh, my God!" "Hey, here it is." "I found it." "Hey, that's my cock!" "Give it back to me!" "Give me back my cock!" "It's just one of your balls, Smitty." "You can live without it." "That's why they gave you two." "I still got my cock!" "I still got it!" "I got my cock!" "They're supposed to be coming this way." "Hold it up." "I said, hold it up!" "I'm eating." "Okay, let's try this." "Come on." " Keep an eye peeled for snakes." " Yeah, and bats." "Bats?" "I love bats." "Sergeant, what's the word from Headquarters?" "Yeah, what did the lieutenant say?" "The lieutenant said that Hermann Göring's panzers overran the 2nd Battalion." "If they break through the division we're in the sea." " Where are they headed?" " Right for us." "Our big guns will clobber them." " They're still on the water." " None of them have unloaded yet?" "Not yet." "Patton's got tanks." "Still on the water." "Jesus." "We're sitting in our own coffin." "We knew he wanted to run for it but we knew he wouldn't way before he did." "Anyway, the sergeant would've shot him if he tried it." "Those American guns?" "I thought they were still on the water." "It beats the hell out of me." " Relays!" "Relays!" " Come on, relays!" "Radio!" "Lieutenant." "Yeah, 1st Squad, 1st Battalion." "You're kidding." "Yes, sir!" "You know who fired that artillery?" "The United States Navy." "That was the crews of Savannah miles offshore, all right?" "Right." "Can you believe that?" "The U.S. Navy saved our ass." "Hey, where's our planes?" "Why can't they spot that gun?" "I don't know, but Battalion's got 20 patrols out looking for it in this quadrant." " They think it's an SP." " So why send us?" "That's right." "We got a break coming." "The Army's made of the 1st Division and 10 million replacements." " Where the hell are they?" " Being stuffed with mattress covers." "Five to 10, when we get off this island, we'll get our feet wet invading Italy." "You don't know geography well for a writer." "We're in Italy." "No, this is Sicily." "Here they say, "I'm a Sicilian," not an Italian." "My old man was bo..." "I figure close to 2500 bucks!" "I'm sending every lira home." "Mussolini money's good for one thing." "It's Victor Emanuel loot." "It's kosher." " Who told you that?" " The captain." "Enlisted man can't send home more than his pay." " That's to discourage black marketing." " But the lieutenant can." "It's for my old man." "Always wanted his own bagel shop." " I didn't know bagels were Italian." " Sure they are." "The pope eats gefilte fish on Friday, don't he?" "It's his mother." "He's hauling her to the beach." " Tell him we'll bury her." " I did." "He'll put her next to his father." "She's decomposing already." "The sun's blowing her up." "We've gotta find that SP." "Ask if he knows where the gun is." " Hell, he doesn't know what an SP is." " You knucklehead." "Tell him it's a self-propelled gun with wheels." "He knows where it is." "The smart aleck wants to make a business deal." "Shell out some bagel money." "He'll take us to the gun we get an ambulance to take her to the cemetery in Gela." "He wants a casket for his mother to sleep in." "And it's gotta have four handles." "All right, he'll get it." "Tell him we'll leave her in the wagon in the shade if he leads us to that gun." "Either we take her with us or we find that gun on our own." "Boy!" "I don't know how long I'm gonna be able to take this stink." "Can it, Johnson, will you?" "Talking about it only makes it worse." "Hey, sergeant." "Think this kid is leading us into a bushwhack?" "Well, we're getting closer to some kind of gun." "Can you see what it is, sergeant?" "Yeah, it's an 88 all right." "On a Tiger tank, in a house." "They got women working in front of her under a Schmeisser." "Yeah, makes a nice, peaceful picture from the air." "What's-your-name, you stay behind." "When you hear us fire, you take out the Schmeisser." "Those Sicilian women cooked us a terrific meal." "Too bad they were all over 50." "We were more horny than we were hungry." "A little mothering is good in any war, but this beats them all." "There's not a man in the whole village." " Hey, Vinci." " Ho." "Tell Matteo the meat wagon is on its way for his mother." "Oh, and that the general is sending up a casket, silk-lined, with six handles on it." "Matteo!" "Matteo!" "All right, Matteo, it's okay." "Thank you." "I told you, kid, a deal's a deal, right?" "That's all right." "That's okay." "No, no, no." "I'm mucho gordo, huh?" "That's okay." "Thanks a lot." "You're okay, Matteo, any time." "It was the first time in ages that we had all felt really good." "It lasted about an hour." "Then we got our orders to move out." "Where's my helmet?" "The Krauts are gonna spot that garden a mile away." "I like the smell." "What's she want?" "You didn't kiss her goodbye." "The American idiot's wearing flowers on his helmet." "Come on." "Hey, Wilhelm, give me back my rubber doughnut." "How about it, Johnson?" " Who are you?" " I'm Lemchek." "Lemchek, remember?" "We been on dry runs for this invasion for seven months in England." "I'm Lemchek." "How about what?" "Will you swap with me?" "Nope." "Eleven is my lucky number." "Try Vinci, he might do it." " Do what?" " Hey, listen." "Swap numbers in the Bangalore Relay with me." "My number two for your number 10." " How much?" " Ten thousand dollars." "Ten thousand dollars!" "Where the hell are you gonna get $10,000?" "It's from my GI insurance." "I'll make you my beneficiary." " Can you do that?" " Hey, I could put Eisenhower down for my beneficiary." "I can put down anybody I want." "Lumnuts, I am really shocked." "You know, you told me your mother was your beneficiary." "What's the matter?" "Don't you love your mother?" " I love my mother." " Sure." "I love my mother." "Sure, sure, I love my mother." "But she ain't number 10 on the relay." "Swap with him." "He gets hit, you get 10 grand." " What if I get hit using number two?" " Ten thousand dollars will buy a lot of bagels." "No, I like my number 10, like Griff likes number eight." "Zab, nine." "Johnson, 11." "The sergeant, 12." "It's bad luck to change numbers." "Don't worry, Lemchek, you'll make it." "You know why?" "Only be dead Germans on that beach." " Yeah." " That's right." " You sure?" "I mean, are you really sure?" " Sure, I'm sure." "You don't think I wanna blow $10,000, do you?" "He don't wanna blow 10,000." "Relax, Lemchek." "You heard what the captain said." "It's a couple of schnell battalions, combat rejects defending the beach at Colleville-sur-Mer." "First Squad!" "First Squad, over here." "Son of a bitch." "This beach hasn't been touched." "Either our shells and bombs fell too far inland or in the English Channel." "Vinci!" "It's Lemchek." "You just blew 10,000 bucks." "Hey, throw me his helmet." "Second Squad!" "Those combat rejects sure know how to lay down fire." "Those aren't rejects up there." "That's infantry." "We couldn't move forward, we couldn't move back." "Exit E- 1 was blocked by a huge barbed-wire tank trap." "Our Navy was supposed to shell it, our planes were supposed to bomb it our bazooka teams were supposed to blow it up." "If all else failed, we were the last resort:" "The Bangalore Relay." "First Squad!" "First Squad!" "Bangalore teams two and three knocked out!" " What about our bazooka team?" " Dead." " Bazooka team?" "!" " Killed." " Break them out!" " Naturally, all else failed." "The Bangalore torpedo was 50 feet long and packed with 85 pounds of TNT and you assembled it along the way, by hand." "I'd love to meet the asshole who invented it." "Ready!" "Number one." " Number two." " Dead!" "Number three." "Number four." "Number five." "Six." " Number seven." " Dead!" "Number eight." "Number eight." "You'd better make it, Griff, you son of a bitch, because my number's up next!" "Nine!" "Hang on." "Come on." "Zab, tell the colonel." "Tell the colonel his Exit E-1 is open." "Colonel." "Private Griff I Company, 3rd Battalion." "Blew the breach." "E-1's open, sir!" "There are two kinds of men on this beach:" "Those that are dead and those that are about to die." "So let's get off this goddamn beach and die inland." "Come on." "Get up." "Go." "Move, move, move." "Get up." "Go, go, go!" "Come on, men, let's go." "Move." "Hey!" "Layton, 2nd Division, right?" "Denham, 29th." "Get some coffees, boys, doughnuts." "We'll chew the fat later." "Hey, come on." "Throw the ball." "Just another buzz bomb headed for London." " Buzz bomb?" " Yeah, V-1 rocket." "How do you like the book?" " Damn good." " Hey." "My mother sent it to me for my birthday." "I'm Zab." " Welcome to the 1st Squad." " I'm Kaiser." "Nice to meet you, Kaiser." "That's my book." " Your book?" " Yeah." "What do you mean, your book?" "I got this from the Repple-Depple in St.-Lo." "I wrote it, baby face." "And I printed it." "You speak good German." "Since 1940, everybody in Paris speaks good German." "I'm sorry." "Where did you get wounded?" "North Africa." "A stupid German machine-gunner shot me from his tank." "A German shot you?" "Everybody shoots everybody in the fight." "And that wound?" "Sicily." "The American idiot wore flowers on his helmet." " Your husband?" " Yes." "He would not surrender, so you, German, shoot him." "He was stupid." "A good soldier surrenders when he's defeated so he can live to kill his enemy another day." "You, I don't want any infantry around the panzer." "Put that dead panzer gunner hanging halfway out the hatch." "Second radio man, here, behind that man." "Put yourself in a good position." "As we slogged through the hedgerows and across France the sergeant began keeping to himself." "It was a little spooky." "He told Vinci he fought around here in the first war." "He kept ahead as if looking for some old ghost to rise up out of the mist." "Kaiser, your turn at bat." "Would you look how fast they put up the names of all our guys who got killed." "That's a World War I memorial." "But the names are the same." "They always are." "Enemy scout advancing." "Give him a round-trip ticket." "I don't want any of you to be where I didn't plant you." "No fingers on triggers." "One shot in panic and we've lost what I want:" "A platoon of dead Americans." "Don't twitch any muscle." "Look dead or you will be dead." "Give him a round-trip ticket." "Nothing but a bunch of dead Germans." " No dead dogfaces?" " None." "Let's go." "Enemy scout returning with patrol." "These dead guys give me the creeps." "Shit, Kaiser, something's always giving you the creeps." " Well, how come there aren't any dead Gls?" " Shut up." "Keep your eyes open." "Just like I said, sergeant, just three dead Germans." " What color is that piping?" " White." "White's infantry." "Radio." "Get me the lieutenant." " Lieutenant?" "Lieutenant." " Yeah, go ahead." " Yeah, this is Sergeant Possum." " Possum, right." "Where are you?" "We're at point 33, Christ on the Cross." "You're in an ambush, huh?" "Nothing here." "Just a bunch of dead Krauts and a knocked-out tank." "All right, sir, we'll wait for you." "Wish we could help, sergeant, but you're on your own." " What's that?" " Good luck." "Over and out." "What?" "Yes, sir." "Well, I'll be damned." "To hell with all officers." "He's afraid the platoon's gonna get lost coming up here so we gotta go back and handhold them all the way right here." "Well, I'll be a son of a gun." "Let's go." "Don't panic." "Live people are watching us." "It's a bushwhack." "I'm hit!" "Check for wounded Krauts." "You're pretty good at that, Johnson, you should have been in the Medics." "Yeah, I was one in Indiantown Gap." " Where?" " Back in Indiantown Gap, Pennsylvania." "Never heard of him." "Is he dead?" "Hey, Johnson, you ever notice how no one ever talks about home anymore, or women?" "Yeah, I noticed." "On the double, boys." "There's a woman in there." " Is she wounded?" " Easy." "Wounded, hell, she's pregnant." " Christ, she looks like she's about to pop." " That's what the man said." "Jesus, sergeant, what are we gonna do?" "Get the dead Krauts out of the tank and get her in it." "Johnson, you're gonna deliver a baby." " What baby?" " Her baby." "Her husband said she's got labor pains five minutes apart." " Why me?" " You're qualified." "Let's go." "Her legs gotta be higher." " Higher?" " Yeah, and spread them apart." "Wide apart." "Face the bullets the other way, away from her." "It's okay, lady." "Relax, would you?" "Okay." "Okay." "Go to work." " We need some hot water." " What are you talking about?" " No time for hot water." " Some rubber gloves." "Hey, Griff, break out the condoms." "I need a mask." "I can't get germs on the baby." " There's more germs in this tank than..." " No mask, no baby." "That's fine." "That's fine." "Give me a diaper pin." "Oh, the rubbers, the rubbers." "Easy, easy..." "That's the United States Army for you." " Take it easy, would you?" " Put them together." "Hey, sergeant I'm getting horny." " Just go to work." "Hey, look." "Lady I'm a hell of a lot more scared than you are, okay?" "Just take it easy." "Get her hands away." "Okay?" "Hey, Johnson, your dog tags." "Come on." "I don't see the head yet." "You're never gonna see it if she don't push." " She gotta push, I think." " What do you mean?" " I think she's gotta push." " You don't know?" " I know." "She's gotta push." " You're sure?" " I'm sure." " You're sure?" " Yeah." " Then do it." "Come on, damn it, push." "Push..." "It's no use." "She ain't gonna push." "We might as well write this kid off." " Can't you push for her?" " No, she's gotta..." "Look, how do you say "push" in French?" "No, you knot-head, not "pussy."" " That's what I'm saying." " No, you said, "pussy." I said, poussez." "Hey, Johnson, look." "You get the head, I'll do the poussez- ing." "All right." "Easy, lady." "Hey, we all love you." "Hey, hey." "I can see it." "I can see his head." "That's it." "That's it." "Push." "Push." "Don't stop, lady." "Come on." "Don't stop." "Keep it up." "You're doing great." "Push." "Push." "Push." "He's coming out." "Great." "He's out!" "He's out!" "It's a boy." "A boy!" "Look at that." "We got a bunch of medals not for delivering the kid, just for killing Krauts." "In September, we slipped across the Meuse River into Belgium ahead of the main American push." "The regiment figures there's a railway gun chopping them up." "Forward observers in a monastery right here." " Why don't we shell it?" " Throw a couple of bombs on it." "There's an underground fighter living in there." "It's a woman, she's a killer." "Her name is Walloon." "She has a squad plan to wipe out the Krauts without firing a shot or killing one civilian." "A woman in a monastery?" "It's really not a monastery." "It's an asylum for retards and insane people." "I say division should bomb it." "Killing insane people is not good for public relations." "Killing sane people is okay?" "That's right." "Let's go." "The Americans are coming" "The Americans are coming" "Two men in the tower." "Squad." "Come on." "Bayonets." "Bayonets." "Beautiful..." "I am one of you." "I am sane." "I am sane!" "We hole up here for the night." "Did you ever figure out what those palm trees are doing here in Belgium?" "Yeah, that monk had a yen for them." "Speaking of yens did you...?" "Did you score with Walloon?" "No she's too old for me." "Good thing Ben Franklin didn't hear you say that." "Ben Franklin?" "That 2nd Squad meatball?" "No." "Benjamin Franklin." "The guy with the kite and the key and..." " Bifocals, potbellied stove." " Declaration of Independence." "What's he got to do with it?" " Well, he wrote this letter." " Yeah?" "What was in the letter?" " He wrote this famous letter." " Well, tell me about it." "He wrote it to a young punk with your problem and he went on to tell this guy he said there's many reasons for hitting the sack with an older woman." "An important reason was she wouldn't saddle him with a kid or give him a disease." "That might be more important." "She also would give it everything as if it was her last lay." "He wound up advising this young Romeo if you can't stomach old Juliet's face, stick a flag over it and shoot for Old Glory." "You're so full of shit." "No, I'm serious." "Listen, Griff do you like her?" " She's beautiful." " Now, don't be a schmuck." "Hello Benjamin Franklin." "I'll be tender." "Benjamin Franklin was never in a rifle squad." "He didn't know the score." "I'm giving it everything I've got." "Because it might be my last lay." "I'll be tender." "Hey, you fellas." "Wave to your folks back home." "That's good." "That's good." "Okay, little girl." "There, smile at me and wave." "At me, at me." "Look right in here, look right in here." "Smile." "Very good." "Give me a little smile." "Give me a little wave." "That's good." "Now I come back here." "Give me a little smile." "That's good." "Smile at me, at me." "That's good." " Give me a wave, now." "Keep waving." " Hello, Mom." "Keep waving at me." "That's good." "Now I'm gonna go this way." "All right." ""In spite of devils and death and the cries of our enemies we will swing together and Germany will be free." "Adolf Hitler."" "Where's the 1st Division now, general?" "Resting in Germany's romantic hunting grounds, the Hurtgen Forest." "I'll be a son of a bitch." "My mother sold my novel to Hollywood." "For Humphrey Bogart and Edward G. Robinson." "Hey, hey." "For how much?" "For 15,000 bucks." "We got another Rockefeller in the company here." "So, what you gonna do with all the moola?" "Well, first, I think I'm gonna blow 1000 bucks on a squad party." "Only you guys gotta think of the damnedest things you wanted to do to a girl." "Hey, Griff." "I'm working on it." " Vinci?" " Hey..." "Come on." " I'll tell you in a minute." " Hey, Johnson." "I think I'd like the most beautiful..." "I know what I want." "Who the hell are you?" "Kaiser." "You patched me up behind that tank in France." " What tank?" " I was the one that liked your book, Zab." "Yeah, baby face." "Yeah, so, what do you want?" "What do you wanna do?" "I want a big, zaftig girl stick her plump butt against an ice-cold window..." "Yeah?" "And just hold it there." " What are you gonna do with a frozen butt?" " Thaw it out." "It may take a while." "Three bursts." "Making millions of splinters, lieutenant." " They spot your position?" " They're not aiming at us." "They're just hitting the trees." "They've got us pinned down." "Take them out for us." " But watch out, they've got snipers too." " Yeah." "Let's go." "Here." "Now." "I can't see a goddamned thing." " Griff." " Ho!" " Zab." " Ho." " Vinci." " Ho." " Johnson." " Ho!" "Kaiser." "Kaiser?" "I'm hit." "Where are you?" "Find me..." "Did I kill that guy that killed me?" "Yes." "Egg on a steak." "I like the way these Belgians eat." "I like anyplace in the rear, if it's a permanent rear." "Pulled out for good." "Right, sergeant?" "You know, none of you guys showed up to the doctor for frostbite." "My toes are okay." " So's mine." " Mine too." "You know, eight guys in the 2nd Platoon got trench foot." "Sergeant?" "Down here." "Fifty thousand Belgian francs." "That's pour vous." "Yeah, it's for you." "Count it." "That's 1000 bucks for one night in your hotel for la squad party." "I had to get rides all the way back to division rear to come up with all that cash." "Et maintenant, beautiful, les femmes pour mon party." "Yes, beaucoup femmes." "Ecoutez." "Listen to what I want." "Like yours, but I mean bigger." "But I want her to plant her ass against la fenêtre." "Let me show you." "I just want you to put your derrière right against the fenêtre." "Okay, I'll show you with my ass, all right?" "Here, watch." "What she's gotta do is, she's gotta be bare-assed when she does this." "It's very important." "La femme keeps her ass against the window until her ass is beaucoup froid." "Because it's très important that she gets her ass frozen." "Fou." "What's fou?" "She thinks you're nuts." "Me, nuts?" "I'm not nuts." "No fou." "No fou." "It's not for me." "No." "It's for my friend." "Kaiser." "He's dead." "He's mort." "The frozen ass is for my dead, mort friend, Kaiser." "She's right, Zab, you're off your rocker." "You want a girl for a dead man?" "Well, one of you guys gotta pinch-hit for Kaiser." " Why don't you?" " I don't particularly go for frozen asses." "Besides, I'm a big-tit man." " What about you, Griff?" " You okayed what I want." " What about you, Vinci?" " You promised me a girl with a flat belly." "Look, Zab." "Five dead guys aren't gonna show up, so forget them." "Okay, no replacements, no party." "The hell with you guys." "Pass on the party, eh?" "Hey, wait a minute." "I'll pinch-hit for Kaiser." "Well, okay, that's more like it." "Kaiser, I'm beginning to see what you like about big butts." "Hey, Vinci, come on." "That is my girl." "That one, right there, she's mine." "It's my party." "Sergeant, can you come here so we can talk about it, you know?" "I'm gonna like winning this Purple Heart." "He was that close, that's where he was." "Easy target." "Easy target." "So he asked me why I didn't get him." "I guarantee it." "Okay, Zab, you know it's time to take the hill." " Take the hill." " Wait a second." "Excuse me, my dear." "Would you help the young lady down, please, sergeant?" "Okay, now let's see." "I..." "I paid for this party so the hill will be took when I say it's to be took." " I beg your pardon." " Well, okay, sir." " Now, move." " Yes, sir." "Come on, let's get on with it." "Don't forget your pieces." "Let's go." "Keep your front sight covers on, or else you'll get a rusty bore." "Let's go." "Move it." "Come on." "Come on." "Come on." "Sergeant?" "Corporal Kolowicz." "Can't you read?" "That sign says "private party."" "Lieutenant Stockwell wants your squad on the double." "Krauts busted through." "They're in Belgium." "We thought we'd push through, but the Krauts regrouped and counterattacked and bumped us back into France." "Lieutenant, we got tanks and infantry coming at us at point 33." "Three-three." " Dead." " What do you mean, dead?" "He wasn't hit or anything." "He's not the first dogface to die from a heart attack." "Now, let's go." "Tonight's the last time we'll be sleeping in beds." "We're being moved to Monschau." "She spotted him by the way he was eating." "Get that Kraut out of here." "Get him out!" "Goddamn infiltrators." "We spent the whole winter freezing our asses off just to take back Belgium." " Switolski?" " Yeah." " You speak German, don't you?" " Well, Polish with a Jersey accent." " My aunt was German." "I know a few words." " That's all it takes." "Tell them." "He says that they're the Volkssturm, the People's Army." "He says that Hitler himself told him not to let one American Schweinehund get past." "Okay, you tell him that I'm gonna count to three and if they don't let us pass, Herr Green Shirt's gonna get the first bullet." "One." "Two." "Three." "Get on your feet!" "Get back, all of you." "Come on, let's go." "The whole German army was on the run now." "We were right on their heels." "There they go." "Switolski, you're a good man." "Griff, I'll tell you how it was." "I mean, the shop was burning." "I couldn't let all this beautiful schnapps go to waste." "Okay, boys." "A little toast." "To the late FDR." " To FDR." " To FDR." " To FDR!" " To FDR!" "I always liked him." "The 2nd Platoon is carrying the ball." "We're getting away with murder!" " Murder!" " Oh, no." "We don't murder, we kill." "Isn't that what you told us in North Africa, sarge?" "Well, that all depends on a watch a pen and a piece of paper." "When the second hand of that watch calls the shot and the kaiser picks up that pen and scratches his name on that paper then you gotta call it quits." "Kill all the Huns you can before then, but never after." "Never." "Switolski." "Keep your eye on that Thompson because that fräulein has her eye on it." "She's just a German, sergeant." "She's not a Nazi." "Has the major left?" "Yes." "He has other places to protect." "But not a castle like this one." "He said as soon as you are finished with the fuses, you are to rejoin your own company." "Cognac?" "Thank you, contessa." "That was good." "How fast do the safety fuses burn?" "Ten feet per minute." "And how much time will I have to get away from here after I light them?" "Ten minutes." "You look exhausted." "You were exhausted." "You were not?" "Hopeless." "With a good night's rest I think I..." " Oh, not you." "The war." "It is far from hopeless." "When a woman of your rank will blow up her castle for the Reich." "Even if an American general and his staff make their headquarters here and I do blow them up, we have gained nothing." "We will still lose the war." "You are wrong." ""Hitler will live for a thousand years."" "Oh, no." "Not that quote, please." "They were your husband's last words." "I see nothing to laugh at, contessa." " He died a hero." " He died a shit." "He told me about his plot to kill Hitler." "We were winning then and I was a Nazi, so I shot him." "Hitler gave him a state funeral and personally eulogized him as a hero killed in battle." "What is your name?" "Schroeder." "Schroeder." "Schroeder." "You can come out of this war alive." "If I shoot you." "Not a serious wound, of course." "I'll tell the Americans I shot you to save their general from being blown up." "I will show them all the hidden explosives, the fuses." "They will take you prisoner." "They will not confiscate my castle or my money." "You will be alive, Schroeder, and rich." "When did you begin to hate Hitler?" "When?" "From the first time he was my guest here." "But like so many others, I had to go along with that fanatic to keep my castle and my money." "I couldn't tolerate that impotent, perverted Austrian peasant." " Hot soup?" " That's right." "You twist something on the can, and the soup turns hot." "I had some myself down at Battalion CP." "Hitler youth!" "We got orders to kill anyone that kills us." "I say we shoot him." "He killed Switolski." "We'll use his body as an example for Hitler kids." " Makes sense." " Shoot him." " Shoot him." " Shoot him." "All agreed?" "Shoot him?" " Yeah, what the hell are we waiting for?" " He's all yours, Zab." " Well, why me?" " Vinci!" "Johnson." "Griff!" "No volunteers, huh?" "I think you got him." "Jew?" "Polish." "Czech?" "Russian?" "He walked around for half an hour before he could bring himself to put the kid down." "Sergeant!" "Sergeant!" " Sergeant!" " Sergeant?" "Over here." "Where the hell have you been?" "I'm not gonna tell you again." " No lights at night." " Sergeant, the war's over." "Look, nobody's firing at us." "One minute after midnight, official." "The war's been over for four hours." "Hey, sarge, the dead Kraut, he's still warm." " You didn't know it was over." " He did." "He's still alive!" "Sulfa." "Come on." " Pills?" " Right here." "Live, you son of a bitch." "You're gonna live if I have to blow your brains out." "Saving that Kraut was the final joke of the whole goddamned war." "We had more in common with him than with all our replacements who got killed whose names we never knew." "We'd all made it through." "We were alive." "I'm gonna dedicate my book to those who shot but didn't get shot because it's about survivors." "And surviving is the only glory in war, if you know what I mean."