" Hey, guys." " Hi, Tomas." " Good day?" " Yeah, two pages." "Is that good?" "Hmm." " How 'bout you?" " Ah, we got two perch." " Is that good?" " Ah, yesterday we had 24, so..." "Well, you ain't writing and the fish ain't biting." " Ah, no." " Come on." "Good for ya." "See ya." "Hmm." " Hi." " Hi." "I was just thinking about you." "You coming home soon?" "Uh, no, I'm just..." "I'm not finished yet." "Oh." "Okay." "How is it going?" "Well, I'm not getting anywhere." "Tomas, don't lose faith." "You have it in you, you know that." "Will you stop saying that?" "It's, it's not that simple." "And listen, I was, I was thinking about what we discussed yesterday." "Do we have to talk about it on the phone?" "I might just as well tell you now." "I'm, uh..." "I'm not ready for all that." "Keep goin', keep goin'." "We're closed." "?" "The weight of the world is getting so heavy" "?" "Restless helpless people get ready" "?" "Remember the sun remember the sun" "?" "Remember the sun" "?" "Remember, remember the sun" "?" "Oh" "?" "It's the middle of the day nothing seems right" "?" "You lost the morning in the middle of the night" "?" "Remember the sun" "?" "Remember the sun" "?" "There's so much to do" "?" "That ain't gettin' done" "?" "The hopes of the people are under the gun" "?" "Remember the sun" "?" "Oh remember the sun" "?" "Remember, remember the sun" "?" "Goin' round and round" "?" "Remember the..." "Please." "Well..." "Alright, alright." "Hey, you okay?" "You're lucky." "Come here." "You're fine." "You scared me." "Here." "Put this on." "Is that where you live?" "Come on, bud, come on." "You cold?" "What's your name?" "Is your mom home?" "Not talkin', huh?" "Alright." " Sara?" " Tomas." " Yeah?" " Maybe you were right..." "Uh, I can't really talk right now." " Something happened." " Uh, are you okay?" " Every thing's fine." " Okay." "Um..." "listen..." "I know that lately I've been edgy." "And you've been so kind." "I just want you to know that... that everything's gonna be different." "Okay." "Okay." " Uh, I'll wait to eat with you." " Yeah." "I'll be home soon." "Okay, bye." "Alright, Christopher." "Everything's gonna be fine, okay?" "Did you make those snowmen?" "You do it alone or with a friend?" "That one's kind of pudgy." "Alright, let's go." "Come on." "Wanna ring the bell?" "Hi, uh, we almost had a little accident down at the road." "Uh, everything's alright, but..." "I think Christopher got a little scared." "Where's Nicholas?" "Where's Nicholas?" "Oh!" "Would you want us to come in with you?" "I'm so sorry, Mr. Eldan." "Don't blame yourself." "I'll contact you if we need any other additional information." "I wish you all the best." "Tomas." " Tomas!" " Uh!" "Let me sleep." "What's going on?" " I'm sleeping." " No, no, no!" "Not here." "You'll freeze to death." "Come on, come inside." "What's going on?" "I need to know." "There was an accident." "With... with the car." "I ran over someone." " Oh, no." " I wanna sleep." "What..." "What happened to that person?" "I don't wanna talk." "It's not getting any better." " What?" " You and me." "We have to stop pretending." "Can't this wait?" " I can't do it anymore." " You've just been through something so..." "I can't do it any longer, Sara." "What do you mean?" "I mean I don't wanna do it any longer." "Neither of us is fine." "And we're not gonna be, and you know it." "I..." "Let's not talk about this, not now." "We want different things in life." "Look, I, I just wanna write." "You want kids." "I don't." "It's that simple." "We just want different things." "Thank you for coming." "I gave 'em your number." "I didn't have anyone else." "That evening..." "I know what happened that evening, Tomas." "It's a small town." "You should have told me the whole thing." "It's not your fault." "It was an accident." "Uh..." "How have you been?" "I'm tired too." "I haven't slept properly the past four months." "Have I been gone that long?" "Do you want me to come home?" "You can't ask that." "You have to tell me what you want." "That's what I want." "I wanna come home." "I don't know." "I, I don't know." "We're still the same." "It never occurred to me that you could do something like this." "The doctor says that it was half-hearted." "The dosage was too small." "That you did it at a time when you knew you could be found." "How am I to understand that?" "Why didn't you just hang a 'Do Not Disturb' sign on the door?" "Can you not do anything properly?" "Do you want me to try again?" "Oh." "Let's see if we can get you out of here." "Sara, you don't have to worry that I'm gonna try something again, okay?" "I feel, I feel better now." "I think I'll start writing again." "Hmm." "Good." " I have some ideas." " You can use my study." "You finished?" "Hmm." "Back among the living, huh?" "Yeah." "How have you been doin'?" "You don't sound so good, dad." "I'm just doing nothing." "Nothing all day long." "You were looking forward to that." "I was wrong." "To tell you the truth, I'm down..." "But not without reason." "What about you?" "Are you out of your mind?" "A suicide attempt?" "Trying to be an artist, is that it?" " Anyway..." " Dad." "What happened at the lab?" "I don't know why you still go there." "You always come back depressed." "I was just grabbing a coffee with old colleagues." "Well, new people like to do things their way." "You should know this." "I mean, what do you expect?" "Some respect, for instance?" "I look at pictures of your mother, Tommy." "And no matter how hard I try I can't remember what it was that we had together." "Dad, please." "Hadn't you been around, we'd have split up." " So it's my fault?" " I never said that." "I don't know why you speak so bitterly about her." "Bitter?" "Was she unfaithful to you, is that it?" "Your mother?" "Unfaithful?" "If only I'd been so lucky." "But she was far too boring to venture into that sort of thing." "Man, why don't you just leave her alone?" "She can't defend herself anymore." "Hmm." "I have done everything wrong." "The years with her." "The years spent on meaningless research at the lab." "Just letting time pass..." "Until it's too late." " It's never too late, dad." " What?" "Every time you come here, all you give me are platitudes." ""It's never too late, dad." Huh?" "Please, do not come here out of duty." "You must have better things to do." "Come if you like." "But do not come because you feel you should." "That's just belittling." "I'll keep that in mind." "What about Sara?" "I haven't seen her in such a long time." "She's, uh, she's out looking at apartments." "Here?" "You're thinking of moving into town?" "We're considering it." "Hi." "I couldn't sleep." "When did you start smoking that stuff again?" "Don't worry, I'll quit soon." "Hmm." "It's kind of selfish." "And I am worried." "Just trying to relax and take my mind off things." " Is that okay?" " No." "Because it's not making things go away." "Tom." "It's great seein' you, man." "Come in." "Ann, can you leave us alone for a sec, please?" "Yes." "Excuse us." "Sit down." "How're you doin'?" "Fine." "I know what happened to you." "We can talk about it." "Not right now." "Maybe later." "I was just feeling really down." "But I'm better now." "The paradox with your kind of work is that..." "Nearly everything, in one way or another can one day become a resource." "How do you mean?" "Those three chapters you sent me last week." "They definitely show..." "Something new." "So you liked it?" "I liked it a lot." "Yeah." "But I rather don't wanna..." "You know, interfere at this stage." "Just continue writing." "Take all the time you need." "You're on to something." "I need help." "I can't do this on my own." " How's Sara?" " Ah, it's difficult." "Yeah." "You know we've had our problems, but..." "I can feel little things coming back..." "Then other times I just feel like giving up and starting over." "With somebody else?" "No, just on my own." "But... she's really been there for me." "Have you talked to her about this?" "She might have similar feelings as you." "I don't think so." "You should talk to her." " Okay." " Wait for me." "Hold it, please." "I'm Ann." "I handle the French language books now." " I'm Tomas." " I know." "George let me read the first chapters of the new book." "Did he?" "I think it was out of pure enthusiasm." " He liked it so much." " Me too." "I liked both of your previous books but I think this one could be even better." "Well... there's still a long way to go." " Go ahead." " Uh, no." "I'm going down to the garage." "Okay." "I'm so excited to move." "Leave Oka." "You're going to love the place I found." "What are you thinking?" "Talk to me, Tomas." "What is it?" "No." "No, come on." "You're kidding me." "Where did you leave him?" "Thank you, everyone, that was very nice." "Thank you." "They love you." "This book, it's gonna do a lot of good for ya." "Hey, uh, Tom." " Yeah?" " Uh, I hate to bring this up." "But, um..." "I need you to renew the contract." "Oh, yeah, I'll sign it." "You had it for 6 weeks." "You worry too much, George." "Come on." "Come on." "Hi." "Why are you here?" "I thought I needed to see this place again." "I couldn't let it go." "So why today?" "If I could I would do anything to..." "To change what happened." "I wish..." "Is that what you came to say?" "Maybe." "Walk with me a bit." "We can only try to believe that there's a meaning to this." "We've been praying for you too, Christopher and I." "And we don't blame you." "It's not like that." "How could it be your fault?" "Uh, well, I..." "I don't know if I could see it that way if I was in your place." "How have you been?" "Well..." "I've been pretty bad." "I mean, I'm... a little better now, but..." "Look, uh..." "I, uh, I hope I haven't made things more difficult by coming here." "I just wanna say that..." "If there's anything I can do..." "Anything to help, I'd like to." "It would make me feel a lot better if I could..." "Do something for you." "Could you wait here for a moment?" "I'd like to give you something." "Maybe this can help you." "Uh..." "I'm not really a religious person." "Look at it anyway." "You said you'd do something for us." "Didn't he wanna come in?" "He was in a bit of a hurry." "Will he be back?" "Perhaps." "Goodnight, my love." "I'll leave the door open." "Goodnight, mom." "Hello?" "Uh, I'm sorry to phone you at this hour." "No, it's alright, I was up anyway." "Can't you sleep well?" "Well, I've..." "I often... stay up to work." "What do you do?" "Uh, I write." "You're a writer?" "Yeah, I..." "I suppose I'm a writer." "Have you had anything published?" "Yes. 3 novels." "The... the 3rd one just came out." "Was that why you were a bit dressed up today?" "Yeah, it was a... small reception." "You're efficient." "How do you mean?" "Well, you've already started on your next book." "No, I just..." "I had a few ideas I was putting down." "Was that why you came today?" "What do you mean?" " Looking for ideas?" " No, no, no." "Don't think that." "I just... need to start something new, you know before the reviews come out and everyone has an opinion." "So, when is the next one coming out?" "Couple of years, if everything goes according to plan." "Does it usually go according to plan for you?" "Well, it depends." " What's your work?" " Uh, I make illustrations." "For magazines, catalogues, books." "So you're an artist?" "No." "My drawings are commissioned." "They're... made to order." "You also work at home then?" "I need to work at home, for the boys." "Is that Christopher?" "Can you wait just a second?" "I'll..." "I'll just check on him." "Yeah, sure." "Hello?" "Hmm." "Are you there?" "Yes." "Hmm." "You don't have kids, do you?" "No, is it obvious?" "Yes, it is." "By choice?" "No... no." "No, I..." "I can't have kids." "Oh, I'm sorry." "Oh, just wasn't in the cards for me." "Something you learn to live with." "Thank you for coming." "There's something I'd like for us to do." "A little ceremony." "Do you like Faulkner?" "Um..." "I don't like him and I don't not like him." "Uh, most..." "Writers don't mean much to me." "I knew you'd say that." "I think I know you a little already." "They shouldn't have been outside anymore." "It was getting late." "I should have taken them in." "But I..." "I couldn't put that book down." "He writes too well." "I put a... name-tag on his jacket the day before." "I shouldn't have done that." "Don't think that way." "There's no connection." "How do you know that?" "I just do." "It's only in your mind." "I shouldn't have done it." "Shh." "This is how he remembers that day?" "Mm-hmm." "I should go before he wakes." "I won't see you again?" "Thank you for asking me to come." "He'll wake up soon." "You should get going." "Hey." " Hi." " Hi." "Isn't mummy coming?" "Umm-umm." "We're gonna go meet her." "Uh-huh, Mina." "This way." " Aren't we going home?" " Mm-hmm." "Where are we going then?" " So many questions." " Are we going to see a film?" " Don't you like surprises?" " What does it start with?" " What do you mean?" " The surprise." "What's the first letter?" "Uh, F." "One more letter." "Mm... it'll be too easy." "One more, please!" "Alright, I'll give you a letter from the middle." " Okay." " G." " I know what it is." " Oh?" "What is it?" "Alright." "We'll just see if you're right." "The teacher said that you were in the paper." "Did she?" "And what else did she say?" "She asked me if I was proud to have such a famous dad." "Mm-hmm." "And what did you say?" "That you're not my dad." "Can you see what she's reading?" "It's your book, Tomas!" "I'm sure she wants your autograph." "No." "Hey, no." "Hey!" "Mina!" "Hi, do you like that book?" "That's the author over there." "Do you want his autograph?" "Oh!" "Yes!" "I would love that." "She does want your autograph!" " I'm sorry about this." " She wants an autograph." "I would love you to sign the book." "Okay." "Sure." "No problem." "Hey, ta-da!" "Tomas has been signing his new book in a park." " Wow!" " It's the first time." "Is it?" "Yeah, I mean, I've signed books before but never out on the street." " He's a celebrity." " No." "It only counts if they ask for it, not if somebody pushes it on them." "No, wait, keep it there, keep it right there." "Keep it right there." "You got it." "You got it!" "Oh!" "Champion!" "Alright." "Look at that." "?" "Doesn't feel too nice I'm gone" "?" "Turn around baby I'll be gone" "?" "Everybody talking trash" "?" "Everybody else digging for cash I'm gone" "?" "Turn around baby I'll be gone" "?" "I'm tongue-tied what I'm trying to say" "?" "I'm so tired of being treated..." "Is somebody sad?" "It's just rain." "Can we still go on the Ferris wheel once the rain has stopped?" "We didn't come here just to sit around and eat, did we?" "Well, hopefully, the rain will stop soon." "But since we have a little time..." " We have something to tell you." " What?" "We've decided to move in together." " Where?" " Into Tomas' house." "We're there most of the time, anyway." "Yes, but now we'll move there permanently with all our things." "Do I get my own room?" "You'll stay in the room you stay in now." "So it's all the same, really." "No." "How did I ever get such a rational daughter?" "We'll live together." "We'll be a little family." "Are you going to get married?" "I don't wanna be a flower girl." "I know that deep down inside she's happy about it." "She just doesn't show it." "She's such a mystery sometimes." "What are you thinking about?" "You're so quiet." "Nothing." "I'm just feeling a little drained." "Sorry." "Can I go shoot some targets now?" "Where'd she go?" "Mina?" "Oh, my God!" "Mina?" "Hey, you okay?" "Hey, Mina?" "Hey, wait." "Wait, wait, wait." "Let's lift it." "Ready?" "Okay, two, three." "Alright, pull her out." " Pull her out!" " I know!" " Goodnight, my love." " Goodnight, mom." "Mmm." " Sweet dreams." " Sweet dreams." " I love you." " I love you." " She going to sleep?" " She'll be fine." "Hmm." "I don't understand..." "How you can sit there and read..." "After a day like today." "It's just my way of coping, Ann." "You have your own way." "Is there nothing that can get to you?" "What would you like to happen?" "Umm, I don't know if I like this." "What don't you like?" "I watched you helping that woman." "You were so calm, so sure of yourself." "Is there something wrong with that?" "You would think you did this kind of thing everyday." "It's what happens in an... an emergency." "You get focused and rational." "The emergency is over now." "So you want me to crack up a little?" "Look at me, Tomas." "I'm shaking." "Look at me." "Show me your hands." "Show me your hands!" "I'm not gonna show you my hand." "I'd like to know exactly what you're accusing me of." "There are different ways of dealing with a crisis." "You have your way and I have my way." "Stop patronizing me." "You..." "You would think..." "After all you've been through in the past, that you would at least be a little upset." "That you'd be a little bit..." "Troubled." "I should have known that one day you would use that against me." "I didn't mean it like that." "I'm sorry, Tomas." "You're not an easy man to live with." "You know, you were right about that word." " Which word?" " The little word like." "You said all my friends are using it all the time, remember?" "Yeah, they do use it all the time." "It's a disease!" "I didn't, like, notice it myself before, that they can't, like, say a single thing without, like, adding that word." "And it, like, means nothing." "It's, like, a lot of, like empty space in the, like, conversation." "And it, like, flutters up, like, everything." "Well, it's a good thing that you, like, noticed that." "So that you don't, like, fall into that trap." "Oh, like, totally awesome!" "Yes, I got it." "Thanks." " It's not me." " It's not finished." "Come on, go back." "You're getting more difficult to draw." "I don't know why." "Dad?" "There was this man with a dog at a bus stop..." "And it was really windy." "And all of a sudden, a... a big gust of wind and he just toppled over." "He looked really funny." "I couldn't help but laugh." "Other people were laughing too." "I swear even his dog was laughing." "When he got back up, he started, like, taking it out on the dog." "You know, pulling at its leash as if he was to blame." "Poor thing." "Yeah." "I felt really bad for the dog." "You're making this all up, aren't you?" "Where is the boy?" " What boy?" " Did he quit?" "Come here." "Here we go." "How do I look?" "You look great." "He is looking old, that old man." "Old, old, old..." "No one looks as good as you, dad." "This old man is looking old" "That old dog" "Here." "He's not gonna make it." "Dad." "It's gonna be okay." "Let's go." "Come on." "Okay." "Here we go." "Look." "The river." "I want to go to the river." "What?" "Dad." "Ann." "Hey." "Yeah, we're... we're on our way." "Uh, but..." "Like the concert, I..." "I don't think it's gonna work." "He's tired and confused and..." "No, we'll still go." "Yeah." "Alright, I'll see you in a bit." "It's okay, dad." "Tomas." "You don't have to worry." "?" "Do we need anymore?" "?" "Do we need anymore?" "?" "Do we need anymore?" "?" "Don't let the cynical world come and tear us apart" "?" "Break us into pieces pull us back in ways that we aren't" "?" "I don't believe you when you tell me" "?" "That you don't really care" "?" "That you don't really care" "Don't you like the concert?" "Sara." "Were you bored?" "No." "Uh, no." "Did you see me in there?" " From the balcony, I saw you leave." " Oh." "You're still sitting near the exit, just like always." "And I've seen you in the papers." "You're doing well for yourself." "Yeah." "It's going okay." " How about you?" " I'm fine." "Well, what are you doing these days?" "Still working at the school." " In Oka?" " Yes." "You... seem the same." "Is that good or bad?" " It's a compliment." " In that case, thanks." " Are you here alone?" " No." "I'm with someone." "Are you married?" "I have a husband." "Any children?" "2, a boy and a girl." "It's what you always wanted." "You got away easy." "I'm not sure what that means." "No one ever hurt me the way you did, Tomas." "I wasn't very nice." "I was only thinking about myself." "It took me years to get back on my feet." "Sara, that's not who I am." "Things happened." "I can understand your anger, but you shouldn't demean yourself." "?" "Won't you shine" "?" "Aa aa aa aaha" "?" "Aa aa aa aaha" "Dear Mr. Eldan, I hope it's okay that I'm writing to you." "You probably don't remember me." "It's more than 11 years ago since we met that evening when my brother, Nicholas, died." "I hope you don't think that I blame you for what happened." "It was an accident." "It wasn't anyone's fault." "I'm 16 now and still live with my mother." "I read a lot and like to write." "Your books are among my favorites." "One day, maybe I'll be a writer like you." "I bet you're wondering why I'm writing to you." "During my childhood, there's been all sorts of issues." "I guess I've been some sort of a problem child." "The school psychologist thinks it would be good for me to meet you." "That it can help a few things to fall into place." "I would really like to meet and have a chat." "I hope that's okay for you." "It would be good if you could write back and say when and where we could meet." "Oh, PS, mother doesn't know that I'm writing this letter to you." " She's my favorite character." " Why?" "She is best friends with her." "They're always fighting though." "Dear Christopher, thanks for your nice letter." "As you might imagine I was very surprised to hear from you." "Even though many years have passed I've never forgotten the day we met." "How could I?" "You want the two of us to meet for a little chat." "To be honest, I'm afraid of what feelings might be stirred up by that." "At least you would have to wait for a while." "I'm in the final phase with my new novel." "At this stage, I can't risk becoming emotionally unbalanced." "I was pleased to hear that you like my books." "They're really not written for people of your age." "I wish you well." "Sincerely, Tomas." "What time is it?" "Mmm." "Hello?" "Why don't you want to meet Christopher?" "It's the middle of the night." "It took him a lot of courage to contact you." "There are things he needs to sort out." "Look, all I said was that maybe there was a better time." ""I can't risk becoming emotionally unbalanced."" " He's only 16." " Look." "You know I wrote that letter for him, not for you." "I found it." "He hasn't tried to hide it." "Alright." "That came out wrong." "You said you'd do something for us." " Have you forgotten?" " No, I haven't forgotten." "I'll talk to him whenever he wants to." "Who was it?" "Uh, just a reader." " At this time of night?" " Yeah." "In the last book, there was something she couldn't understand." "She sounded a bit disturbed." "Hmm." "I have a question for you." "Umm..." "There's a chapter in "Winter" where..." "This man carries a boy on his shoulders." "Is that me?" " Is it you?" " I don't know." "I've always felt as if it was me." "You know, he... he has the boy on his shoulders like this, holding his legs." "Well, I..." "I..." "I have a daughter." "It's a fairly common way to carry children." "It's only your stepdaughter, right?" "How do you know that?" "I must have read it somewhere." "You said that you write a little bit?" "Now and then." "Then maybe you understand that when you write..." "Ideas can come from all different kinds of places." "You know, some come from experience and others are based in imagination." "And it's not always easy to tell them apart." "My school psychologist says I'm a bit hung up on you." "What you and I went through..." "That day..." "Was out of the ordinary." "It was an experience that causes scars." "Permanent scars." "And over time..." "Maybe you start thinking differently about it." "You know, memory can play tricks on us and you maybe even start blaming yourself..." "It just seems a little unfair." "What's unfair?" "I mean, look at your success compared to my mom." "That doesn't have anything to do with it." "Look, I..." "It took me years..." "To put that accident behind me." "I was in a very bad place." "I was at a bottom." "But then I moved on." "Books from before the accident weren't as good." "I'm a writer." "It's what I do professionally." "I write books." "And with each new book, hopefully I get a little better." "That's all there is to it." "I, uh..." "I don't think we're gonna gain anything by stirring up all this." "It's been years." "Excuse me." "Can you sign these for me?" " Alright." " Bye." "See ya." "Then you can follow me to the storage place, alright?" "Yeah, alright." "Okay." "Where do you want your award?" "It doesn't matter." "Don't pretend you don't care." " Where do you want it?" " On the mantle." "Good choice." "Who did not close the window?" "That is one meaningless question." "Why?" "Maybe it opened by itself." "I'm serious." "I didn't open it." "The point is the last one out closes it." "Alright." "Maybe... maybe I did it." " I'm the one who sinned." " It's not a sin." "Maybe a little ghostie did it." "I hate coming home when the window is open." "Gives me the creeps." "Well, these shoes are killing me." "I think the ending's finally falling into place." "So what's the answer to the big question?" "Will he come back?" "Yeah, I don't..." "I don't feel like any of the other options make sense." " You don't like it?" " Hmm, I do." "No, you don't." "I can tell." "Frankly..." "It just seems a little..." "lame." "Ah!" "Lame?" "Well, the editor said the same thing." "He just wasn't so blunt about it." "Maybe you're right." "What's that smell?" " Ann, get up." " What's that?" "It's pee, Tomas." "Someone peed on our bed!" "Is there anyone you suspect that might have done something like this?" " Umm-umm." " You in conflict with anyone?" "Any of the neighbors?" "No." "Not that I know of." "Any of the children in the street that may have something against you?" "I don't think so." "Where were you when this happened?" "We were in Toronto." "I had a reading." "My daughter and my wife were with me." "After, we went to dinner and then flew back and drove here." " A reading?" " He's a writer." "He received the Giller Prize." "Oh, I'm sorry." "I should probably know you." "It's okay." "So what are the chances of catching this person?" "Chances of finding this person are not great." "Get in touch if you find that there's something missing." "And, uh, try to think about who might bear a grudge against you." "Not very helpful, were they?" "We can't sleep here tonight." "Why don't you two go and stay at your parents?" "Hey, I'll stay here." "I'll get a cleaning crew to come here and we'll clean the entire place." "Hmm." "Do you do this often?" "Pee in people's houses?" "Only on beds." "A man of principles." "That's good." "I'm impressed." " Impressed?" " Yeah." "Takes guts." "How's your mother?" "Fine." "She sold the house." "Hmm." "I'm in college now, so she started traveling again." "She's in England visiting grandma." "Okay." "Over here." "Up." "Up." "Okay." "That's fine." "You gonna make it in time for school?" "Yeah, easy." "Hey."