"We should have gone to Toscana instead of seeing this stupid play." "Janice is my best friend." "This is her only son." "I think it was very nice of him to invite us." "He's usually a very private person." "I'm not going to go find him afterwards and tell him" " what a brilliant director he is." " Yes, you are." "Why do people invite anybody to anything?" " I have no idea." " Two, please." "Let's go home, Masha!" " I'm staying here tonight." " Masha, let's go!" "The baby must be hungry." "Nonsense." "Matryona will feed him." "It's a shame." "Three nights now without his mother." "You are becoming tiresome." "In the old days, at least you'd philosophize, but now it's always home and baby, home and baby." "That's all I ever hear from you." " Let's go, Masha!" " Go yourself!" "What is going on?" "I'll try." "Peter?" "Will you come home tomorrow?" "Yes, tomorrow!" "Stop bothering me!" "What's this for, Mama?" " Pyotor asked us..." " Peter?" "Asked us..." "There's something wrong with my husband." " Please, shh!" " He, um..." "Oh, uh, did he ask us to make up a bed for him in Kostya's room?" " Honey, talk to me!" " Yeah." "Old people are like children." "Well, I'm going." "Goodbye, Masha." " Goodbye, Mother." " Um..." " Peter!" " Oh my God." "No!" "What should we do?" "What's wrong?" "Hello?" "Hello." "Who is this?" "Who is this?" "Where is my wife?" "And where is my daughter?" "Hello?" "Nate, it's Maggie." "Are you okay?" "What's wrong?" "Um, I'm sorry to bother you." "I didn't know who else to call." "That's okay." "What's going on?" " Who is it?" " Oh, God." "David, I can't find the Sports section." " Have you seen it anywhere?" " No." "The delivery guy probably forgot to put it in again." " He stinks." " Then I'm out of here." "I'm gonna be late for Roger's." "That's fine." "I have everything under control here." " Hand it over!" " You know..." "I hope you've been noticing how much I've been watching my temper." "I am really trying to be patient," " but those boys are not easy." " Yes, I know they're not easy." "And if I forget you remind me once a day." "Would you listen to him?" "He's just a sweet little kid, basically." "Yeah, I guess so." "Yeah, yeah." "Durrell, what the hell are you doing now?" " Watching TV!" " David, turn that off!" "I can't find the remote." "I can never find the remote!" "Where did you find those?" "Those tapes were in a locked box underneath a pile of old Ralph Lauren sheets underneath our bed." "Then you know where I found them." "Uh..." "Durrell, from now on when something is in a locked box underneath a pile of old sheets, that means it's private." "Fine." "Great." "Can we get ready for school?" " We're gonna be really late again." " Shit." "I mean, shoot." "Get dressed, you guys." "Come on." "Now." "Let's go!" "That went well." "Hey, Kirsten, are you coming to Doc's tonight?" "Yeah, baby!" "I was going to my parent's, but thank God, my mom has a staph infection." " Hey, Johnny, you coming?" " Yeah, baby." "How about it, Claire?" "Uh, hang on, I just have to finish this one thing." "There." "Yeah, a bunch of us are going to Doc's after work." "The bar in the mall?" "Doc Hannigan's?" "That's just 'cause it's the closest place, and they have pitchers." "Everyone from work goes there." "I'm sorry." "I didn't mean to..." "Come on, Claire." "You think your shit don't stink?" "No, I think my shit stinks." "Great." "So you coming then?" "Um, maybe another time." "Okay, fine." "I guess we'll just have to talk about you all night." "Yeah, baby." "There's something nice about being alone." "It's like finally I can just relax." "I made George the focus of my life." "First when we got married, and then even more so when he got sick." "It's just not healthy, right?" "Mm, one person's "healthy" is another person's "sick."" "Some women have to make someone else the focus of their life or they lose their minds." "No judgments." "It's an exciting time for me." "There's a world out there I've been missing." " Are you keeping yourself busy?" " Am I ever." "There are so many cultural events in this city" "I've always wanted to participate in." "Last week, I learned all about Cabbala at the Skirball Center." "And Dutton's in Brentwood is having a Jay Mclnerney reading the day after next." "Now who's that?" "He's the guy who wrote "Bright Lights, Big City."" "I knew his old coke dealer." "Sweet guy." "It's the 20th anniversary of that book." "I figured it was time for me to finally read it." "Oh, Victoria, your get-together is tomorrow night already..." "Don't worry, everyone's invited." "Do you need anything?" "I could bring my famous potato salad." "That's sweet, but please don't worry." "Everything's taken care of." "Mm." "Mm." "So it's between this one and this one." "Which one do you like better?" " I like this one." " Yeah?" " But..." " This one's nice too." "Exactly!" "Oh, they're both great." "Excuse me." "Thanks." "Hello?" "Yes." "Yes." "Okay." "Okay." "Sure." "Uh, thanks." "So have you decided?" "Uh, I'll come back sometime." "I didn't have this appointment in the books." "Maggie called me in the middle of the night." "The deceased is a friend of hers from church." " Maggie is a Quaker?" " Yeah." "George was a Quaker?" "No no." "She converted when she got married." "What exactly are Quakers?" "They're very peaceful..." "Yeah well, everyone knows that." "Have you seen Rico?" "He said he had something important to do." "I'll be right in." "Hello?" "Obviously these are not the results we expected." "But there's no reason to assume the worst." "The blood test was positive, which indicates potentially that the baby may have some sort of disorder..." "Like what?" "Such as Down's or spina bifida." "However, this test is extremely inconclusive." "Over 95% of babies who test positive have neither of these two things." "So what's the point of it then?" "To get more information." "Given these results I recommend we do an amniocentesis." "I didn't even want to take the stupid test." "Everyone said it would be fine." "I want to schedule the amnio for as soon as possible." " No need to panic yet." " Yeah, right." "Hey." "What are you doing home?" "Well, uh..." "I made up a story and got off of work for a few hours 'cause I knew it was your day off." "Day off, right." "I went grocery shopping, cleaned up the kitchen and I'm in the middle of my fourth load of laundry." "It's been a real party." "You don't look busy now." "This is my first chance to get a breath." "I'm reading." "Mm-hmm." " Rico?" " Yeah?" " What are you doing?" " Trying to relax you." "I can relax myself." "As long as you're here you can take out your stuff in the back closet like you said you would three days ago." "Oh." "Sure." "I don't know why you wouldn't go out with those people." "Sometimes you think you're better than everyone else." " Hopefully I am." " Well, you're not." "Anyway, I'm exhausted." "I had no idea doing nothing all day could be so tiring." "When I was your age I had so much energy." "Besides, I want to try to do some work tonight." "Oh, what are you working on now?" "Actually, nothing." "I am totally dry." "I haven't even been to my desk in weeks, because every time I sit down and try to think of how I want to express myself I just come up empty." "It's like this giant abyss with total, like, stillness." "It's kind of the loneliest feeling in the entire world." "Oh." "Well, uh, you'd better hurry up and change." "Dinner will be ready soon." "Those stupid telemarketers!" "You know, I'm gonna become more involved in those organizations that get them outlawed." "Hello!" "Oh, hello, George." ""Come over tonight"?" "No." "I don't see why this..." "Fine." "I'm very busy, but I'll try and stop by tomorrow afternoon." "I'm sorry, George." "I can't chat now." "Okay." "Bye." " Is he okay?" " I'm sure he's fine." "Whatever's going on with him I'm not gonna get sucked into it." " I have my own life now." " Maybe he's just lonely." "You seem a lot more sympathetic to him now than you did when he was living here." "It's always easier to be nice to people when you don't have to see them." "You don't even know what a integer is." "I do so." "I mean, I have a basic idea of what an integer is." "Integers are numbers..." " Am I in trouble?" " Of course not." "But maybe you should listen to your music in the other room." "I'll just stay here and be quiet." "Okay, where were we?" " Integers..." " David?" "I thought you said you were gonna be quiet." " I think something's burning." " Fuck!" "All right, it was wrong of me to say that." "We don't use language like that." " Can I get that?" " Of course, you live here now." "You don't have to ask if you can get the phone." "Hello?" "Oh, hey." "It's your lover." "Do I have a lover?" "From now on you can just say it's Keith." " Yes, master." " I told you I don't like that joke." " Give me my Discman!" " You're hurting me!" "Both of you, out of here, now!" "Just get out of this room!" " You boy!" " You half a man." "Hello?" "Hey, I'm not gonna make it for dinner." "Uh, Sissy and the kids are in town." "I've got to take them to Geoffrey's in Malibu." " Well, lah-di-dah!" " What's that supposed to mean?" "You know what?" "Nothing." "I'm just in the middle of five things here." "You have fun and I'll see you later." "Ow!" "I hate you, you pig." "Ew!" "You smell like cow manure." " What are you doing?" " I was just cleaning things up." "You were reading my private stuff." "I thought we had rules about other people's private stuff!" "She suffered from some form self-esteem issues, Dr. Benett?" "Yes, a lot of those stem from her childhood traumas." "But some stem from the size of her nose and her weak chin." "Those are the ones I can do something about." "Are you pleased with the results?" "I am, but Mary's going to be the real judge when she looks into the mirror for first time tonight." "Oh, you didn't tell me what time I need to get off work tomorrow." "Just come home whenever you want." "No, I mean did you hear what time we're supposed to go in for the, uh, the amnio." "I've been thinking I don't think the amnio's such a good idea." "Well, Melnick seemed to think it was." "She acted like we had to have it." "No no, she said the results were very inconclusive." "I think we should just move on and try not to think about it." "But I thought we decided that we were gonna..." "No, I didn't decide anything." "I don't want an amnio." "You know, they can cause miscarriage." " What are we gonna do?" " We wait for later... ultrasound, and then we get more information." "But if there's a problem we should know about it now." "Why?" " So that we can take care of it." " What does that mean?" " You know what that means." " I don't want to get rid of this baby." "And I'm not going to no matter what." "If we find out there's a problem, we'll deal with that then." " Okay, if that's how you feel." " Yeah, that's how I feel." "Is it how you feel?" "I don't know." "So what's the big deal?" "Durrell's in some assembly and he didn't invite us." "So what?" "So we're his parents, Keith." "We're supposed to go see him in school things." "What did he say when you asked him why he didn't invite us?" "Uh, he just mumbled something about killing us if we tried to go to it." "Well, maybe we should listen to him and not go." "I couldn't sleep all night thinking about having all this porn in the house." "Shit!" "Just help me, you asshole." "Okay." "What's his reason for not wanting us to go to the assembly?" "This one we're keeping." "Do you think it's because we're gay and he's ashamed of us?" "He's not the one that's ashamed about us being gay." "This is not about being gay, it's about porn." "It's probably something as simple as he doesn't want us there to see him forget his lines and get that dumbass look kids get on their face in those things." "Maybe." "We better get going." "We've got another huge bag in the back." "Federico... can you tell me if this mayonnaise has gone bad?" "All mayonnaise smells bad to me." "Making your potato salad, huh?" "What's the big occasion?" "I'm going to a party tonight... at Victoria Adams's house." " She was in "More for Me."" " Oh, I saw that show once or twice." " It seemed sort of stupid." " She's a friend of mine." "Oh, I'm sorry." "So, uh, how are things with you now?" "Now that you're, you know, single?" "They're wonderful." "I've been to a lot of interesting cultural events lately." "In fact, if you want to, you could come to a Jay Mclnerney reading with me tomorrow." "Oh..." "I'll take a pass." "I've got be with Vanessa and the kids." "I understand." "Do you think this has too much dill?" "You must be very happy now that you're back with Vanessa." "Vanessa's a very forgiving woman." "Actually, she isn't." "She never wants to sleep with me." "No matter what I do or say I can't get her to look at me with that same hunger she used to have." "It's so painful." "The most horrible part is when I look at her," "I still get so fucking hard." "You know, masturbating can relieve some of the tension." "There were long periods in my marriage to Nathaniel when he was constantly masturbating." "I want passion!" "I want my wife to want me so bad that every time I walk by she wants to squeeze my ass and grab my..." "Federico?" "Uh, yeah." "Too much dill." "Hmm..." "So finally I say to these guys at the next table," ""Look, here's the line and here's you."" "Hey!" " Oh, hey, Ted." " Hey." "Marianne, you think I can get those asbestos documents later today?" " Oh, yeah, sure." "Is 5:00 okay?" " Yeah, baby." "That's great." "What is that?" "Oh, it's nothing." "I'm Ted, by the way." "We haven't met." "Claire." "Yeah, Ted's the lowest-paid lawyer in the office, so you don't have to suck up to him as much as the rest." "You guys looked like you were having fun last night." "Marianne, were those guys at the next table trying to pick you up?" "Yeah, baby." "Are you gonna go tonight?" "I'm gonna try and make it." "Later!" " Mm." " Bye, Ted." "Later." "Oh, hey." "It's me." "Do you want to have lunch?" "Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late, darling." "But I was just in the middle of all this paperwork." "Yeah, so I see." "Okay, okay." "Cat's out of the bag." "What do you think of him?" " Did you see his ass?" " No, I didn't." " Who is this person?" " Oh, he's this brilliant therapist who studied with Gareth Feinberg." "Actually, I think you met him once a long time ago." "Anyways, so we ran into each other at a party a couple of weeks ago." "And, you know, one thing led to the other." " You know how that is." " No, not really." "Come on, don't judge me, dear." "God, I wonder if anybody else saw us." "What's the big deal?" "Don't you and Olivier have rules like you and Dad did?" "Oh, if only Olivier were that emotionally mature." "No, he has some very antiquated ideas about relationships." "Yeah, well, people are strange." "Darling, let's try and have some nice girl time, shall we?" "Isn't that why you called?" "Yeah, I guess so." "So, I've been thinking this baby is going to wreak havoc on your body." "Let me give you the number of this brilliant Gyrotonic trainer" " who will just change your life." " Hmm." "I can't wait." "So that's the end of the walk-through." "Don't worry about tomorrow." "We will take care of everything." "Uh, one more thing... there isn't going to be another funeral in the other room?" "No, of course not." "I can assure you you won't hear anything during your silent centering time." "Except a few grumbling tummies, I suppose." "Oh, Mrs. Burns, if you wouldn't mind signing some of those forms I told you about..." "Of course." ""Silent centering time"?" "Silent worship." "We believe that God is within all of us." "If we get together and are silent hopefully we each hear something from God." "What if you don't?" "You make something up." "At least I do." "How do you... how do you know God's not telling you what to make up?" "Nate, is something wrong?" "Are you sure you don't want anything?" "I had an enormous sandwich for lunch." "Oh, okay." "You didn't happen to read" "Paul Krugman's editorial this morning, did you?" "He had this marvelous take on Bush..." "George, why did you want to see me?" "This, uh, period of being alone has been very difficult for me, Ruth." "Well, I've been doing a lot of thinking..." "I'm not getting back together with you." "I know that." "I just wanted to talk to you about getting a divorce." "Well, of course that's what I want too." "Apparently, we just have to live for six months in separate residences, then file some papers." "Um..." "I think we should get a quicker divorce." "I've been doing some research, and if one of us flies to, say, Haiti for the weekend we can take care of this thing a lot sooner." " Is this really necessary?" " I think it will be healthier for our psyches if we just, you know, move on." "You want to fly to Haiti for a quickie divorce just for our psyches?" "Ruth..." "I'm engaged." "Her name is Joy Solomon." "I met her at a tea at Dean Kekalos's house." "She's a Women's Studies professor, visiting this semester." "We were both raised in Missouri." "I guess I should have expected this." "Boy, I am some fool all right." "Listen, I know how this must sound to you, but..." "I'm in love." "I think I should go." "Do you want to talk about your feelings?" "Strangely enough, I don't think I have any." "Goodbye, George." "First off, the chances are that everything's going to be okay with this baby." "But even if it's not... it could still be okay." "How can you of all people say that?" "When the doctors first told me that Jesse was sick..." "I was so scared." "We had to give him all these shots that made him scream." "And then there were all the useless operations." "But, Nate... all the horrible things don't take away from what he gave me." "The first time that Jesse laughed?" "He used to..." "He used to get so excited to look at the moon." "He was only two, but he was a person." "An amazing person." "And he was here such a short time," "I feel just incredibly lucky that I got to know him." "It made me a bigger person." "And that's something all children do." "You guys don't want your parents going to school things, right?" "Not really." "Mom always tries to get the teachers to validate her parenting." "And Dad always slobbers over Mr. Janetti, the guy who teaches shop." "I knew I was right." "David thinks that we should go to Durrell's assembly against his will." " But you agree with me?" " Absolutely." "It sounds like Durrell is trying to assert his individual identity." "At least for now." "Gradually he'll come to have some familial identity." "The important thing is not to force it." "Let him initiate at his own pace." "I've got write these things down for David." "Oh, don't worry." "I'll do it." "Oh, um... thanks." "All right, Kirsten, meet me at the elevator." " First, I have to go potty." " Yeah, baby." "Hey, Johnny, you coming?" "Yeah, baby." "But I'll meet you there." " Uh, Johnny?" " Hey, have a good night, Claire." "Oh, I was wondering, are you guys going to Doc's?" "Ruth!" "I'm so glad you could make it." "I really want you to meet my friend Mitchell." "And what is this?" " It's nothing." "I just..." " Your famous potato salad." "Now I remember." "I told you not to bring anything, you devil." "Here." "Let's just put it here with everything else." " It's too big." " Nonsense." "Let's just push this stuff aside." "There." "Perfect." "Now start mingling." "No one's gonna bite you." "Well, maybe if you're lucky someone will." "You know, I'm really not drawn to mechanical animals." "Me neither." "I'm actually not really drawn to live animals." "So are you seeing anyone?" "Oh, I was living with this guy for a while." "What happened?" "Uh, we broke up." "And now I hear he's left town." "Probably to go to some overpriced loony bin." "He's kind of a nutjob." "I don't know why I just said that." "He's a great guy." "He's really unique." "And the whole thing was just..." "I don't think I was ready for something real, like something with challenges." "And he was in a different place than me." " He's a little older." " I'm seeing an older guy." "Actually, he's just a year and half older." "Really?" "What's he do?" "Lawyer." "Yeah." "From the office." "We're trying to keep it quiet." "Oh my God." "Who is he?" "What?" "Ted?" "Oh." "I've never seen you two together." "Oh, well, we're trying to be cool about it." "I mean it's still sort of new." "See we hooked up at Hong Fu's birthday party in November, then we didn't talk for like a month." "Then we were both here a couple of weeks ago and ended up fooling around in the guys' bathroom." "It's really rank in there." "So now you're dating?" "I think we will be soon." "We just need to take it to that next place as soon as he deals with some of his intimacy issues." "Sure." "I get it." "I really should watch more sitcoms." "I keep meaning to, but I never know when they're on." "I just did a spot on the new Jennifer Love Hewitt show." "Sweet girl." "Well, uh, Mitchell..." "Yeah." "Ruth!" "You look so forlorn standing here all alone." "Let's circle and see if we can find some nice quirky guy for you." "Thanks, Cindy." "But I don't think so." " Oh, come on, Ruth." "It'll be fun." " No, it won't be fun." "I am seven million years old." "And I have this emptiness that won't go away." "I've gone everywhere and I've done everything." "I even went to the stupid Skirball Center." "And I am still all alone." "Everyone else gets to find someone just like that." "So I'm done." "That's it!" "I just want to be left alone so I can shrivel up in peace." "Please!" "Okay." "Thanks." "Yeah, baby!" " Yeah, baby!" " Yeah, baby!" " Claire!" " Oh, hey." "I've been doing some research on you." "Oh, really?" "Yeah, I heard you're, like, this amazing artist, had a show and everything." "That's pretty impressive." "Oh, I think you have me confused with someone else." "Really?" "I don't think so." "So what are you, like, some guy who always knew he wanted to be a lawyer?" "To tell you the truth, it was just the easiest path for me." "I like being a lawyer." "It's just one part of my life though." "Sounds interesting." "If you're really interested, maybe some time I could show you the other parts." "I should be getting back to the table." "Do you want to join us?" "Uh..." "I should get back to my friends." "I don't care what those two freaks of nature said." "I am going to this assembly tomorrow, and that's that." " Why?" " Because it's important." "Kids should look out into the audience and have someone rooting for them." "You know when I was in seventh grade I was a sailor in "Anything Goes."" "I know." "You bring it up once a week." "Well, my mother came but my father didn't." " Why not?" " Plane crash." "He had to deal with a whole family that died." "We had this ritual in my family that whenever one of us was in a thing at school we'd always go to Marie Callender's for Boston cream pie after." "I hate Boston cream pie." "Anyway, we went without him but it wasn't the same." "I still say Tate and Enzo have a point." " Of course you do." " What's that supposed to mean?" "Keith, you'll seize on anything not to be a parent to these two kids." " You're barely here." " I have to work." "And when you are here, you hardly talk to them." "I'm not allowed to." "You made sure of that." "I just don't want you to yell at them." "That doesn't mean you have to avoid them." "This whole thing sucks." "I'm doing this all alone without getting any credit for being a single parent." "Fine." "Then you can go by yourself tomorrow because I think it's the wrong thing to do." "Don't you feel anything for these poor kids?" " Don't you have a soul?" " Of course I have a soul." "That's a terrible thing to say about your partner." "Yeah, well, it's a terrible thing to feel about your partner." "Whew." "Wow." "That was amazing." "That's nice, sweetie." "That's okay." "You don't have to do that." "What do you mean?" " Don't you wanna come?" " No." "I'm good." "Okay." "So now my mother is fucking this guy once a week after his Gestalt seminar." "Don't you think she's depressing?" "Not really." "What's depressing is her being with some asshole who pontificates about art all the time." "I think it's great your mother's having a good time." "What about Penelope?" "Who's Penelope?" "A name for the baby if it's a girl." "I don't really feel like talking about baby names right now." "Well, is there something you want to talk about?" " Yes!" "I hate the name Penelope." "Penelope's pretentious." ""Penelope thinks she's so great when she's not."" "I don't even know anybody who'd want a Penelope." "You're really mad at me, aren't you?" "Oh, spare me." "Okay, so you want me to go to a doctor, make sure everything's all right with the baby." "And if it isn't, you want me to kill it?" "Jesus, you don't have to put it that way." " Well?" " Yes, that's what I want." "And I don't see what's wrong with that." "We can try again." "I was just talking with Maggie, and she was telling me how difficult it is and how many sacrifices she had to make when her child was sick." "How many financial problems she and her husband ended up having." "And just how fucking hard it is." "Did she regret having him?" " Look, that is not the point." " Why not?" "Because you and I aren't Maggie." "She's better than we are." "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" "And what about Maya?" "Bringing a sick child into the house would be very difficult for her." "It's not fair." "I mean, did you ever think of her?" "I think Maya would love whoever this child is." " She's a very loving person." " Oh, unlike me?" " Brenda!" "Yoo-hoo!" " Oh, shit!" "Brenda, honey!" "Honey!" "Didn't you hear me?" "Oh." "God, no." "Sorry." "Oh, well, don't mind me." "I'm just dropping this off." "It's for the baby." "You just popped in unexpectedly to drop off an expensive gift?" "Uh, well, Olivier was asking some questions about how come lunch took so long." "I see." "Oh, I need you to cover for me, honey, just in case he calls you in one of his drunken rages." "Mm-hmm." "Well, why don't we just open this up so you can tell me why the baby won't like it?" " Oh." " Honey?" "I'm really glad you decided to come." "It means a lot to me." "Yeah, well, I've always wanted to see the musical celebration of, uh, "biodiversity."" "Now remember if you see Durrell look in our direction just scrunch down." "What do you mean?" "I didn't tell him we were going to be here." " Why not?" " Because I'm scared of him." "I thought the whole point of this was to give him emotional support." "We are." "He just doesn't know it." "Let's keep it that way." "Ooh, it's starting." "# We are plants #" "# We are animals #" "# We are people and we share this planet #" "Oh, really, darling." "I don't see what the big deal is." "Oh, thanks, Mom." "That makes me feel a lot better." "Oh well, all couples have these kinds of disagreements." "You think I didn't want to abort you and Billy?" "But your father talked me out of it both times and the rest is history." "Honey, the most important thing is that you and Nate are a team." "You have to see each other as allies not as enemies." "Well, how do I do that?" "Well, honestly, by looking at it from his side." " Do you really think he has a point?" " Actually, I do." "I mean, life is so fucking hard even when it's easy." "So why not try and make it less challenging if we can?" "I-I understand." "No, I can hold." "Is someone there?" "Hello?" " How can I help you?" " I'm not sure." "I was supposed to go to a Jay Mclnerney book signing, but I somehow when I got in the car" "I drove over here and looked you up in the directory." "And now here I am." "I'm Ruth," "George Sibley's wife." "You're Joy Solomon, his fiancee, right?" "Um..." "No, I'm still here." "But I think I need to call you back." "# But if I mine too much # # lt'll cause water pollution and such #" "# I am an elm tree, don't overplant me #" "# I need to be surrounded by other trees #" "# Or else I'll die of Dutch elm disease #" "# I am a coral reef... #" " David." " Oh, sorry." "Why did you even have a bomb shelter?" "That's not the point." "The point is he barricaded himself down there looking like some kind of mountain man." "When they finally pulled him out and put him in the mental hospital, well, that's when the really crazy stuff began." "Please, stop." "Please, just..." "I knew he seemed a little too good to be true." "But I didn't care." "I was just so happy to meet someone who said he wouldn't mind having children." "Oh my God!" "Children?" "George means well, I suppose, but he's not exactly great father material." "What do you mean?" "I can give you his son Kyle's phone number." "He's sweet, but scarred for life." "Maybe it's not in here." "I can just call with it later." "You seem... how do I know you're not just some crazy person?" "Do I look like a crazy person?" "A little." "I'm trying to protect someone like I wish someone had protected me." "Well, maybe none of this is really true." "Maybe you're just some bitter angry psychopath." "I am not angry!" "Oh!" "Did you tell her how you feel?" "Yeah." "Yeah." " I'm sorry." " Thank you." " Hey." " Hey." "Hi, Brenda." "Hello, Maggie." "Well, I guess I will take my seat." "It's sort of a bad time, but I can talk for a second." "What's up?" "I came here to say that..." "I felt I'd been a bit stubborn." "That somehow this whole thing has come down to a choice between my marriage and this child." "And it seemed reckless to risk my marriage... over taking some stupid test." "Great." "But now that I'm standing here looking at you..." "We've been so separate for a long time." "It's like we're together, but we're not together." "And I've been thinking that it's me." "That it's my fears or my hormones." "But I think that it's you." "It's us." " Listen, Bren..." " No, don't touch me." " Can we...?" " Don't." "How can I make you feel better?" "What do you want me to do?" "Oh, God!" "Just do what you want!" "For once in your life, just do what you want." "Not what you think people want or what you should do." "'Cause I don't give a fuck anymore." "Just... would you wait?" "Oh, hey." "Hey." "Sorry." "Excuse me." "Oh, sure." "You know, I was an artist before I started working here." "Yeah." " What?" " I was in art school, I mean." "But I dropped out 'cause I was sick of it." "And I thought I would have more time to just create." "Except I've been a little uninspired, so I haven't really been doing much of anything." "And now it sort of feels like maybe that's over, which is kind of scary because that's how I've always defined myself." "But then again, maybe it's kind of freeing in a strange way." "Anyway, that's to answer your question from last night." "Oh, I'm glad you told me." " Why?" " I don't know." "I don't know what Kirsten told you about anything." " She hasn't told me anything." " About what?" " Anything." " Oh." "Well, she and I had sex once and we made out once, and that was that." "I just wanted to make that clear." "So now I have and..." "I'll go now." "You're home again?" "Yeah." "I just came home for lunch." "You?" "Lunch." "Good." "I'm not gonna try to make love to you again, if that's what you're afraid of." "What's..." "what's going on here?" "I don't know what you're talking about." "I'm eating a tuna salad." "No, I mean with us." "I thought we were back together." "We are." "Then what about sex?" "What about it?" "You got some last night." "You didn't." "You got what you wanted." "You're back in your house with your kids." "What's the big fucking deal?" "Wow." "Well, you obviously still hate me." "Why did you do this?" "Huh?" "Why did you ask me to move back in?" " My goodness, what the..." " Ruth!" "When did you start locking this door?" "George, I'm busy right now!" "Go away!" "What gives you the right to say those things to my fiancee?" "It's none of your business!" "It was my business when I had to clean up your goddamned mess!" "Please, I want to be alone right now!" "You don't want to live with me!" "You don't want to let me go!" " What the hell do you want?" " I don't know!" "I'm completely out of control, doing crazy things!" "And missing my Jay Mclnerney reading at Dutton's in Brentwood!" "Maybe I need help of some kind!" "All I know is I hate you and I wish you would leave!" "Come back here!" "Ruth!" "You dickwads went to my show!" "Durrell, you know we don't use language like that." "And that was in my private Kenneth Cole shoebox." "You know what I said about people's private things." "Yeah." "Well, was I okay?" "Are you kidding?" "You were an incredible elm tree." "I totally believed you." "Hey, what about me?" "Don't you want to know what I thought?" "You were amazing." "Let's go and celebrate and get some pie at Marie Callender's." " Marie Callender's is stupid." " Yeah, that's true." "Well, go get Anthony, and tell him to turn off that horrible music." "We'll go somewhere else." "Anywhere you want."