"THE GRAND DUKE'S FINANCES" "An adventures tale by Frank Heller, adapted for motion pictures in six chapters by Thea von Harbou." "Chapter 1, wherein we will know an incredibly small island which might be in the Mediterranean Sea, the Great Dukedom of Abacco, its charming tyrant, Ramon the 12th (Harry Liedtke), last heir to a little crown and to a quite big public debt," "Don Esteban Paqueno (Adolphe Engers), its pitiful Secretary of Economy, and the earthly Grand Duke's gods:" "Augustina, his chief cook," "and Joaquino, his personal aid (Hugo Block)." "Unfortunately, we won't be able to help making awkward aquaintances:" "Two people with no manners or conscience, Semjon Marcowitz (Guido Herzfeld) and Mr Bekker (Hermann Vallentin), and some more evil characters, the four conspirators:" "the Dangerous (Georg August Koch), the Mysterious (Max Schreck), the Hunchback (Hans Hermann), the Miser (Walter Rilla)." "And now begins the story." ""His Highness cannot be found anywhere in the castle!"" ""Your Excellency, the Secretary of Finance, Don Esteban Paqueno."" ""... but His Highness is still sleeping."" ""Then I'll wait until he wakes up."" ""His Highness enjoys throwing away what's left of his patrimony!"" ""Marcowitz insists he must meet with His Highness!" "The payments are due in three days time!" ""His Highness must speak with him personally!"" ""Well, dear Mr Marcowitz, what is it that you want?"" ""My money, Your Highness!"" "But these are not the only grey clouds in the Great Dukedom of Abacco's skies." ""Were I not to get my money within the next 3 days, I'll keep your entire island!"" ""My knowledge is gone, Your Highness!" "How will we be saved now?"" ""Yes, dear Paqueno, we'll have to find another solution..."" ""Your Highness' marriage to the Great Duchess Olga would save Abacco."" ""God knows how grateful I am to the Great Duke Nicolai for opposing to his sister's wedding to a man whose Dukedom is nothing but debt."" ""Howdy, gentlemen!"" ""I must speak to the Grand Duke!"" ""His Highness, the Grand Duke of Abacco, does not wish to speak to anyone!"" ""A great sum of money wouldn't do the trick?"" ""Take a sit, I beg you, sir!"" ""My name is Bekker, Your Highness, and I am here to buy Punta Hermosa."" ""Punta Hermosa!" "?"" ""If I were to give you 5 million Francs for Punta Hermosa, you shouldn't care what I want it for."" ""If it was up to me, even 10 million."" ""Either you speak more clearly, Bekker, or..."" ""Mr Bekker, His Highness has terminated this meeting"" ""This means I have discovered a vast deposit of sulfur at Punta Hermosa!"" ""Sulfur...?" "!"" ""...and, you intend to exploit the deposit with the help of my countrymen?"" ""... for ten million...!"" ""Never!"" ""¿Paqueno, do you really expect me to become a scoundrel to my subjects?"" ""Someone, such as yourself, who is endebted up to his neck cannot be so choosy!"" ""Maybe you think ten million is not enough, sir!"" ""Maybe you want part of the profit!"" ""Wait for me, kid!" "I'll get you this time!"" ""Thank God!" "Abacco is saved!"" ""I see no other solution for Abacco, unless it comes down from the sky!"" ""Argggh, what a disgusting fellow!"" "I have decided to become the Grand Duchess of Abacco." "I know you as little as you know me, but I like you since I heard the trouble you went through... to help the shipwrecked people from the "Palestrina"." "It doesn't matter that you don't have money, I have plenty." "I'll get your economy under control!" "Summing up " "Yours, Olga, Grand Duchess of Russia" ""Isn't she great?"" ""Get the Grand Duke now!" "Throw him out of the island, which isn't even his anymore!"" ""Revolutions cost money, gentlemen!"" ""Never mind, gentlemen..." "I also have some unfinished business with the Grand Duke of Abacco."" ""All right, then?"" "End of Chapter 1." "Chapter 2, wherein we expand the number of our aquaintances including Philipp Collin, aka Profesor Pelotard (Alfred Abel), a gentleman who changes name and trade, and Mr Isaaks, businessman and recently elected Congressman (Julius Falkenstein)." "(His still recent follies of youth grant him our simpathies beforehand)" ""Mr. Isaaks, can I congratulate you for being elected?"" ""If you're not able to help me, my career in politics is over."" ""One upon a time there was a spicy young lady..."" ""... and those letters of mine, those incredibly reckless letters, belong now to the greatest blackmailer in the world."" ""Trust me, Mr. Isaaks, it will pass."" ""You haven't found the letter yet?"" ""I must confess to something to His Highness"" ""Your Highness, I wanted to... get a deferment from Marcowitz with the Grand Duchess' letter."" "It doesn't matter that you don't have any money, I have plenty." "I'll get your economy under control!" "Summing up " "Yours, Olga, Grand Duchess of Russia" ""No, dear, I'll keep the letter"" ""So, the letter, the Grand Duchess' letter," "Marcowitz has it now?"" ""Then, we'll have to go get the letter!"" "Meanwhile, Philipp Collin was considering the matter." "Mr. Semjon Markowitz, I hereby let you know that I have come to own a letter for which certain people would pay great sums of money." "If you're interested, you may find me between 5 and 6 at Melchiorstr. 12, by the greenhouse, Boston and Klix."" "Grand Duchess Olga - Grand Duke Ramon " "It doesn't matter that you don't have any money, I hace plenty." "I'll get...!" ""Out!"" "Boston and Klix Animal voices impersonators." ""Better is better."" ""Now, professor, what are the fees?"" ""50 thousand Pounds, Mr. Isaaks"" ""As a loan."" ""¿What the heck will you do with all that money, professor?"" ""An amazing gamble in Abacco's treasury stocks."" ""The head you just pulled from me is worth more than the whole of Abacco."" ""And I can assure you that, if you buy Abacco's treasury stocks, you'll be able to buy India's throne within the next 8 days."" "Should Philipp Collin not hurry with his Stock Market's scheme, some people may ruin his plans." ""I therefore give you enough money to start a revolution and I support your Presidency." "In exchange, I get Punta Hermosa as it is."" ""We're leaving tonight... in secret!" "I don't anyone to find out about this trip to the continent." "I believe we'll be back within the next 8 days."" ""..." "You'll govern in the meantime."" ""This is cracking."" ""We must tell Mr. Bekker."" ""Telegram, telegram!"" "Today, at the Stock Markets in London, Paris and Rome, 80 % of the Grand Dukedom of Abacco's public debt was purchased by an unknown buyer." "There's great unrest in all financial circles." "What's going on?" "Wire your answer." "Perez Agency." ""A play with Abacco's stocks..." "That's the end of the world."" "End of Chapter 2." "Chapter 3, wherein two misterious cars play an important role, and a young lady shows up who doesn't want to be recognised for now (Mady Christians), because a descendant (Robert Scholz) from Ivan the Terrible is chasing her." "Stock Market's sensation!" "Stranger buys Abacco's stocks." "Who is behind this play?" ""Save me, sir, if you're a gentleman..." "Talk to me as if I were your fiancée."" ""Brandy, quick."" ""I get dizzy when someone passes out."" ""Is that car gone now?"" ""I'm fine now." "I'll pay the bill and then leave."" ""How much for the brandy?"" ""Will you... will you accept a ring as surety for your expenses, sir?"" ""So far, my lady, you have granted me the honour of considering me a gentleman..." "Surely I am not a pawnbroker!"" ""Will you not tell me what I can do for you?" "Are you running away from someone?"" ""Would you be so kind as to take me to the Hotel I'Europe?"" ""Turn around, driver, turn around."" ""I have seen the red car drive past, but he wasn't in it!"" ""The train for the South leaves at 7:45, your Imperial Highness!"" ""To the station!"" ""I'd rather be dead than found!"" ""Do you trust me... unconditionally?"" ""How long does it take to get to the station?"" ""Twenty minutes!"" ""Unconditionally!"" ""I always pictured my wike like this!"" ""Not in the train either!"" "End of Chapter 3." "Chapter 4, wherein Mr. Philipp Collin meets the greatest problems caused by professor Pelotard, whom he had taken under his wing unsensibly." ""I have called you, professor, because I've been at the bank and I want to settle my account."" ""First, let's see the bill!"" ""No, some brandy first."" "Mr. Philipp Collin sees a light!" "Berlin Diary Stock Market's sensation!" ""Find out, Paqueno, when we'll be able to resume our journey," "I cannot leave so quickly my world fame!"" ""..." "In Abacco!"" "Revolution at Abacco!" "The Grand Duke overthrown!" ""Enjoy, Mr. Collin...!"" "The Grand Duke's missing, possibly murdered." "The Grand Duke overthrown!" "Louis Hernandez, President of the Republic." ""For God's sake, does His Highness know...?"" ""In the long run, dear Paqueno, my abdication would have been inevitable."" ""My throne in India!"" ""Do you happen to know who's worst off in this story?"" ""Can you imagine how quickly he will come here?"" ""I know who is behind this!"" "For overthrowing the Grand Duke all the people mentioned below will be paid 2.000 $." "Should the Grand Duke lose his life, the pay will rise to 5.000 $." "The delivery of Punta Hermosa" ""We must return to Abacco at once!"" ""All communications with Abacco are interrupted."" ""Some boat must go there!" "Listen, I must get to Abacco!"" ""Perhaps Captain Treponte..."" ""I've been told at the Port's Office captain, that he's a man who doesn't fear a single thing..."" ""I must get to Abacco!"" ""Yes,... this is the Grand Duke Nicolai's car, 200 powerhorses!"" ""I've been told at the Port's Office captain, that he's a man who doesn't fear a single thing..."" ""My Stork has just been chartered for another trip to Abacco." "By professor Pelotard."" ""By my wife!" "?"" ""I appeal to your sense of justice, madam!"" "It would be far worse than mere unsolidarity to leave for Abacco without me."" ""Professor, see us as two simple travellers who must go to Abacco inexcusably."" ""If you want to get to Abacco you don't need my consent, but my wife's!"" ""I believe he's well tamed!"" ""Two gentlemen from Abacco."" ""Revolutionaries?"" ""Friends to the Grand Duke!"" ""Are you out of your mind, getting down with no disguise?" "Don't you remember you're being chased?"" ""I hope you want to go to Abacco to help the Grand Duke."" ""I must go to Abacco at once!"" ""Wait!" "Wait!" "I'm going too!"" ""Didn't I tell you Marcowitz is in a hurry?"" "Philipp Collin has had a new moment of inspiration and decides to address all his travel companions as "Highness"" "from then on." ""What ship is this?"" ""It's a single engine... to the service of His Imperial Highness, the Grand Duke Nicolai of Russia..."" ""I'll go to Abacco on that ship!"" "End of Chapter 4." "Chapter 5, wherein some people reveal their identities and the Republic of Abacco is threatened." ""Admiral!" "I beg of you!" "I must get aboard, Admiral!"" ""No way!" "His Imperial Highness is in a terible mood!"" "Semjon Marcowitz, who can show recommendation from" "Her Imperial Highness, the Grand Duchess Olga." ""Destination Abacco!"" ""Are you aware that your interest in Abacco may be dangerous for your life?"" ""I'm... a journalist!" "I have to be where things are happening!"" ""And your wife?" "Is she a journalist too?"" ""You wouldn't be asking that if you knew my wife!"" ""For God's sake...!"" ""What an extraordinary effect a little sea breeze has had!"" ""I can't wait to get to Abacco!"" ""What newspaper does your husband write for?"" ""I..." "I've known him only for a little time!"" ""Ah, you're on your honeymoon?"" ""Good afternoon, Mr. President!"" ""What have you done to Joaquino and Augustina, you rascals?"" ""... at the White Pavilion!"" ""It's too much for your nerves, Your Highness." "Get some rest." "I'll manage to find the White Pavilion."" "End of Chapter 5." "Chapter 6 Heil the Grand Duke!" ""Nice gallows, Your Highness!" "Wouldn't you say so?"" ""Revenge is sweet, my son!"" ""Let's hang the Grand Duke of Abacco!"" ""..." "He's the Grand Duke!"" ""..." "I'll buy his life from you!"" ""How much is it worth for you, honey?"" ""A million francs... each, will it do?"" ""Don't let her fool you!" "If she has that much money, let's take it from her!"" ""Don't touch him!" "As true as I am the Grand Duchess Olga," "I tell you I'll take your lives if you take his!"" ""Well, you'll see him hung!"" ""My brother!"" ""Are you the Grand Duke of Abacco?"" ""Get the gallows ready now!"" ""Will you tell me why?"" ""A man who uses the letters of the woman who loves him as an exchange item, deserves hanging."" ""You'll have to prove it first!"" ""Will you be deceived by this ridiculous forgery of my handwriting?"" ""If this letter is false, where is the real one?"" ""Here!"" ""Caught!"" ""Get the ship's chaplain!" "Get him to arrange a wedding!" "A punishment must take place!"" ""I must have something, I always pass out when someone gets married."" ""A toast for your marriage to be as happy an operation as mine with Abacco's public debt has been!"" "THE END"