"Come on!" "Move your ass, motherfucker." "I'm coming." "I'm coming." "Come on!" "Open it!" "Want me open the doors?" "What are you doing?" "Huh?" "Here." "The keys." "Take them." "Why are you speaking in English?" "Why you talk English, huh?" "What?" "No!" "No, no..." "Ohh..." "Ahh..." "Gambling destroyed my life..." "Me, my family, everything I loved." "It was like a robbery, only I was the thief." "It's amazing, the stories you tell yourself to justify it..." "The lies that lead you to just one more hand, one more spin, one more roll of the dice." "This is our deal, okay?" "Marie, no." "You guys are not lifting a finger." "I mean it." "Yeah, we're bringing everything, so..." "This..." "This is not up for debate, okay?" "Great." "Now, sweetie, don't worry, okay?" "We're not going to say one word about the bills." "We just want to bring everyone up to speed, okay?" "All right." "I'll see you soon." "Bye." "So... tonight's the night." "No turning back." "Well..." "Okay." "Let's do this." "Okay, so first I assign point values, correlate to the effect of removal." "You going to split the 8s?" "Skyler, please." "Now, the mathematical principle, known as the Kelly Criterion, upon which I devised my own strategy not dissimilar to the MIT system." "Walt, you're not teaching them." "I thought you wanted me to be thorough." "Just play." "You're taking too long." "What, you don't think it behooves me to be able to explain any of this?" "It behooves you to be a pro, that's all I'm saying." "That's the fiction, so chop-chop." " Don't chop-chop me." " Walt." "Now, we both know that the first decision is whether or not to split or surrender on" "8s." "Split 'em." "Mm-hmm." "Good on both." "Next decision is whether to double down or not." "What you should be doing." "On 11, yes." "Double." "Okay, this hand over here, we have a soft 18." "The final decision is whether or not is to hit or to stand." "Hit it." "Becomes a hard 15." "Dealer has a 9." "I see that." "Hit it." "Oh." "Okay, let's see what I got." "And 21." "Damn." "Yep." "Okay, this..." "The key thing to remember here is that it's not about any one hand." "The key is the number of hands per hour." "Ooh." "Let's go again." "Zero, minus 1." "Okay." "Walt." "It's not as if I don't know how to play." "I certainly more than understand how to count cards." "Let's just keep going, okay?" "No, you know what?" "I'm in recovery." "Remember?" "I shouldn't even be playing." "And that is the fiction that we should be sticking to." "You know what?" "You're right." "Yeah." " Wow." " Okay." "Um, we're not leaving anything to chance." "All right, let's get started." "I've got a lot of, uh..." "Walt, we've got a lot of ground to cover." "What is this?" "We have to get our stories straight." "We've got to be on the same page." " Is this a script?" " Bullet points." "Bullet points?" "Like a novella." "This is smart." "You really want to try to sell a DEA agent some... ill-prepared, half-assed, full-of-holes story about how we suddenly have enough money" " to buy a car wash?" " Am I supposed to memorize this?" " We need to practice, Walt." " Yeah." "We need to be word-perfect." " Within reason." " We need this story to be solid and sympathetic and most of all completely believable." "A story that you already told Marie and you think that she hasn't told Hank?" "Ha!" "Come on." "This is Marie we're talking about here." "No, she hasn't." "She hasn't." "Hank thinks his insurance is paying for everything." "Marie's not telling him that we're paying his therapy bills, and neither are we." "And why is that again?" "Really?" "If we have the gambling story..." "Did you take money, Walt?" "You remember Gretchen and Elliot?" "Because I seem to recall that you'd rather sell drugs than take help." "Fine." "Marie will tell Hank in her own time, and at least we'll have laid the groundwork." "And coming clean with Hank and Jun..." "Appearing to come clean will be the best thing for everyone." "We talked about this, okay?" "We agreed about this." "Yes, we did." "It's just..." "What?" "Never mind." "Just..." "Okay." "So I really think we should tag team the narrative, okay?" "We'll each be responsible for certain portions of the story, and then we can, uh, we can hand off so we don't leave anything out, and it'll seem the most natural." "Okay, so I'm going to launch with the exciting news that we are buying a car wash..." "Yay." "The next logical question" "Hank will probably ask is "Where are you getting the money?"" "Hmm." "To which I'll say" ""We want to tell you the whole story." ""It's a doozy, so hold on to your hats."" "Do you like that?" "Sure." "It accomplishes two things." "It keeps it light while letting them know to expect something big." "Uh-huh." "Yeah." "No." "It's a doozy." "Hmm." "Okay." "Anyway, that's where you will take over, starting with your diagnosis, pages 1 and 2." "Okay, and it's..." "It's pretty much going to run parallel to the truth, which makes it easier, but, um... just make sure to really hit the cancer, really touch on the fear and despair." "It's good to remind them and to get their sympathy right off the bat." "We want them to understand why you could do something so stupid." "Now, after that, per pages 3 and 4, after you say..." ""Gambling became an addiction, and I just couldn't control it."" "Do you see that..." "Yes." "Right there in the middle of the page?" "Okay." "Oh, and I put in that line about robbery." "You know, from the G.A. meeting?" "I thought that was good." "So next I'll chime in about how it affected our marriage, uh, starting with the confusion, uh, the deceit, why we couldn't tell anyone." ""...terribly, terribly ashamed of my actions."" "Yeah." "There's two "terriblys"?" "It's supposed to show contrition." "Well, I just wouldn't use that word." "I would never say the word "terribly."" "Phrase it however you want, okay?" "You're jumping ahead." "Now..." "And why..." "Why am I so ashamed?" "Do I really need to answer that?" "I was and am providing for our family." "Let's just pick up where we left off." "I'm weak, and I'm out of control." "I mean, this whole thing makes me look like crap." "This has to be a warts-and-all story, Walt." "That's how we'll sell it, and we both look bad." "Oh, well..." "How do you look bad exactly?" "Where is the "I slept with my boss" bullet point?" "I can't seem to find that anywhere." "For a fired schoolteacher who cooks crystal meth," "I'd say you're coming out pretty much ahead." "I don't like it." "I don't want Junior thinking less of me." "At least you won at gambling." "I'm just the bitch mom who wouldn't cut you any slack." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry that I put you through all of this." "How's that sound?" "Hmm?" "Here." "Two "sorrys."" "I believe we were on page 5." "So, after you say how very sorry you are..." "In your own words, of course..." "We're almost to the end, and I say how proud I am of you for joining a 12-step program, and..." "And this is where I think we should enact how we're feeling, you know?" "Just a..." "Just a suggestion." "You might look down on the floor with remorse." "Hmm?" "What?" "You don't have to mean it." "You just stare down at your feet, Walt, okay?" "Then, uh, I'm gonna..." "I was thinking of taking Marie's hand and saying something emotional like "It's such a relief to tell you." ""We're just so glad we have a strong family" ""to help us through this, that we can all support each other."" "And then maybe I'll tear up a little." "I don't know." "I'll just have to see what happens in the moment." "You're going to cry?" "On cue?" "I said I don't know." "Maybe." "When you dab your eyes, you going to do it with your right hand or your left?" "It's just an idea." "One tear?" "Two tears?" "This has to be convincing, especially to Hank." "I'm doing the best I can here, Walt." "And yes, I'm thorough." "Maybe lying doesn't come as easily to me as it does to you." "Hey!" "Guys!" "Come on in." "Hi." "Good to see you." "Hey." "Put her there, you little punk." "Hi." "Hey." "Great to see you, Hank." "Hey, buddy." "How you doing?" "Oh, look at my little princess." "She's getting big, huh?" "And heavy, too." "Whoa, is that actual food I'm smelling?" "I might get an honest-to-God meal here for once?" "You look good." "Thank you, sweetheart." "Your aunt Marie, she's cute, but she could burn water, you know what I'm saying?" "You are so very hilarious." "Go show the boys your new rock collection." "We're going to get things organized." "Yeah, it'll be about 20 minutes." "You have a rock collection?" "It's a mineral collection." "Uh, just a little something I..." "You guys want to see it?" "Want to see it?" "Sure." "Let's go see it." "Oh, hey, let me." "Hey, it's all right." "I got it." "Come on, guys, it's down the hall here." "Now that one there, that's Rhodonite, okay?" "It's manganese inosilicate." "Cool." "What..." "What makes it be all pink like that?" "Well, that's the manganese part, okay?" "It..." "It oxidizes, you know, like rust." "Exactly." "Manganese can have an oxidation state of between -3 and +7, which takes it through a range of colors..." "Purple, green, blue." "But its most stable state is +2, which is usually pale pink." "So..." "Exactly." "Whatever the hell he said." "Anyway, you, uh, you get the idea." "Yeah, it's, uh, interesting." "Interesting stuff, that." "Really." "Oh, hey, uh, here." "Give me that file, will you?" "You got to check this out." "I, uh, have been working on something here." "Been a little, uh, little consulting..." "You know, weighing in on a case for APD." "Put that in, will you?" "Put that in over there." "Uh, Hank, what is this?" "It's not a dead body..." "No, no, no, no." "Nothing like that." "You guys..." "Seriously, you got to check this out." "This is good." "Ready?" "Here we go on here." "Look at this guy." " Look." "♪ A ship is waiting ♪" "♪ All systems are go ♪" "♪ Are you sure ♪" "♪ Control is not convinced ♪" "♪ But the computer has the evidence ♪" "♪ No need to abort ♪" "♪ Countdown starts ♪" "Oh, man." "You can't make this stuff up." "♪ 4, 3, 2, 1 ♪" "♪ Earth below us ♪" "Who is this?" "That, my friends, is Albuquerque's public enemy number 1." "♪ ..." "Weightless ♪" "♪ Calling, calling ♪" "♪ Home ♪" "It's such a relief to finally tell you." "We're just so glad that we have a strong family to help us through this, that we can all support each other." "Jesus." "I don't even know where..." "Holy shit." "Yeah." "Walter H. White." "Man of hidden talents." "Dad, you're such a stud." "How much did you win exactly?" "Dad?" "I..." "I don't think I have exact figures." "It's, uh, it's enough to..." "Uh, after taxes, of course..." "To buy the car wash." "Maybe even pay for a couple of halfway reasonable college educations." "Damn, Dad, why'd you quit?" "I can totally get a car for my birthday now." "Right?" "Son, I'm... terribly, terrible ashamed of my actions." "Would you excuse me, please?" "I need to use the restroom." "Wow." "Walt?" "Hey." "Whoa, whoa." "Oh." "Sorry." "I..." "I thought you might have fallen in there." "Uh, no, no." "I just, uh..." "Hey, man, that was some big stuff back there." "Yeah, we wanted to be thorough, so..." "Yeah, well, it's quite a tale." "It couldn't have been easy to talk about." "You know, Walt, if you... you can always bend my ear, right?" "I mean, if you ever need to talk or..." "Or just blow off some steam." "I'm..." "I'm here." "Not going anywhere." "Thanks, Hank." "Same goes for me, you know." "If you ever want to bounce anything off me." "I don't know, case work, anything, really." "Sometimes just talking something through, you know, really can make a difference." "I mean, we're definitely not talking, you know, bathtub crank here." "This is a big-ass operation." "You know, hundreds of pounds a week, maybe more." "So, uh... who is this person?" "What do you know about him?" "Other than the fact that he's deader than a Texas salad bar and has a decent set of pipes?" "I'd say he's my guy." "Your guy?" "There's this, uh, mystery man" "I've been, uh, chasing for the better part of a year." "Cooks the purest meth that, uh, me or anyone else has ever seen." "Goes by the name of Heisenberg." "Hmm." "Yeah." "Pretty weird, huh?" "I..." "I..." "I looked him up." "It, uh, it was one of these physicists..." "One of Hitler's guys, a physicist named Werner Heisenberg." "Real cute, huh?" "Anyway, I figure with a handle like that, you know, my guy's got to be some sort of an egghead." "No offense." "And here we go..." "Gale "Major Tom" Boetticher." "Anyway, I..." "I..." "I just want to see if I'm, you know, not barking up the wrong tree chemically speaking." "Uh, as far as I can make out, he's writing about phenylacetone cook, right?" "Yeah." "Yeah." "That's pretty rare these days, but it..." "It does jive with the blue stuff I've been tracking." ""2 sticks dairy free soy margarine, 2/3 cup turbinado sugar"?" "It's a recipe for vegan s'mores." "Hmm." "There's all kinds of crazy crap in there." "Yeah, like, uh, you know, top ten recumbent bicycles, indoor composting tips." "All right next to the..." "The mother of, uh, of methamphetamine synthesis." "This guy was a, uh..." "Man, he was a real character." "Yeah, he seems, uh, unique." "Here, let me..." "Let me..." "Let me show you something." "Give it..." "Give it." "Right here at the, uh..." "And here's the top." "It says, uh," ""To W.W." "My star, my perfect silence."" "Huh." "W.W." "I mean, who do you figure that is, huh?" "Woodrow Wilson?" "Willy Wonka?" "Walter Whyte?" "You got me." "W.W." "Hey, man, let me see this... for a second because I think I remembered..." "Ah." "Here." "Yes." "Yeah." ""When I heard the learn'd astronomer..."" "Learned." ""And from time to time" ""looked up in perfect silence at the stars."" "It's a poem by Walt Whitman." "Your W.W." "You frickin' braniac." "Ha." "You frickin' braniac." "Ha ha ha!" "I must have skipped that day in school or something." "I don't know." "Hee hee!" "I've been chasing my tail about that one, you know?" "I bet you're right." "Well, I'm glad I could be of help." "Yeah." "Walt Whitman, huh." "So, uh, you think this" "Gale person is your Heisenberg?" "Yeah, I think so." "I don't know." "God, I wanted to get this guy." "It looks like you did." "No, I mean, you know, me personally." "I wanted to be the one to slap the handcuffs on him, that kind of shit." "Popeye Doyle waving to Frog One." "If I recall, at least from the first French Connection," "Popeye Doyle never actually caught him." "Ha." "Yeah, I guess me and old Popeye, huh?" "A day late and a dollar short." "What about the person who killed him?" "APD's problem, not mine." "Any leads?" "My buddy Tim says he's got some fingerprints they're trying to ID, and an eyewitness saw a person of interest." "Might get lucky there." "I guess somebody knows something." "They'll track down the shooter eventually." "Jesse!" "Excuse me." "♪" "Jesse?" "What's up?" "I need to talk to you, okay?" "Now." "Go ahead." "Would you stop doing what you're doing, please?" "When I'm done, yo, that dude's next." "What the hell?" "What is wrong..." "I have some business to discuss." "So discuss." "Jesus." "Let go of me." "Gale's murder is being investigated." "Uh, duh." "And I have it on good authority that they found fingerprints at the scene." "Not mine." "We done here?" "No, we are not done here." "What if they are yours?" "How can you be so sure?" "Because I'm here, all right?" "Your brother-in-law's got such a hardon for me that if the cops would have found my fingerprints..." "Shh." "The cops would have found my fingerprints within five blocks of that place, they would have picked me up by now." "What about the casing?" "Or casings?" "How..." "How many times did you shoot him anyway?" "Jesse, did you pick up the casings?" "Did you pick them up?" "No." "Listen, uh, we've got to go over this step by step..." "Everything." "I want you to tell me exactly what happened from the moment you got there." "I got in, I got out." "No." "No, I need to know specifics." "Now, we'll start from the beginning." "You..." "You drove there." "You drove over there." "You went to his door, right?" "Jesse, I need you to concentrate." "This is very important." "Did you knock or ring?" "Knock or ring?" "Uhh!" "Knock." "Okay, good." "That's very good." "Now listen." "I assume that Gale answered the door." "Now what happened after that?" "Did he recognize you?" "Did you say anything to each other?" "Did you walk into the room, or did you shoot him right then and there?" "What?" "Who wants to make a hundred bucks?" "Huh?" "Look, the kid's probably right." "If they had anything on him, he'd be locked up already." "What about my brother-in-law?" "He suspects Jess..." "Hell, he knows Jesse is involved in the sale of blue meth." "That was Hank's one and only lead." "Now what if he puts 2 and 2 together and he goes after Jesse for the murder?" "He goes after him how, on his Rascal Scooter?" "Ahem." "That, perhaps, sounded insensitive." "Uh, but if he goes after him," "I'll sue his ass for police brutality, harassment, assault, and 16 other things." "Now, the history that those two have together being what it is, you got to figure your brother-in-law's smart enough not to go down that particular road." "Goose egg, bupkis..." "That's what the cops got." "I wouldn't worry about it." "What else should I not worry about, Saul, hmm?" "Should I not worry that Gus plans to murder me at the first chance he gets?" "Should I not worry that my drug-addicted partner doesn't seem to care whether he lives or dies?" "You should see his house." "It's..." "It's like Skid Row." "He has actual hobos living there." "Now how long before Gus decides that he's too big of a risk?" "Geez, that Mike, that grunting dead-eyed cretin sucker-punching me in the..." "In the face." "I've got Gus wielding a box cutter." "I mean, Western Union..." "Message received." "It..." "Let me ask you." "When did this stop being a business, hmm?" "Why am I the only person capable of behaving in a professional manner?" "No, I..." "No, any way you slice it, everyone's in danger." "I mean, how..." "How can I protect anyone?" "My family, Jesse, myself?" "My name never comes up with those guys, does it?" "Meanwhile, we're buying this stupid car wash." "Oh." "Yeah." "That ship has sailed." "Bon voyage." "We are committed." "We already told our family about it, and now Skyler, I'm sure she believes..." "She needs to believe that everything is neat and tidy, and she's telling herself that I work in this nice quiet little lab with a white lab coat and a pocket protector and when my contract is up" "I'll just simply hang it all up, tip my hat, and walk away." "Oh, God." "How did everything get so screwed up?" "Yeah, you do have a little shit creek action happening." "You know, FYI, you can buy a paddle." "This is a last resort back pocket kind of thing, but if you really got to protect yourself, uh... disappear." "Poof." "Poof?" "There's a guy who can make it happen." "Call him a, uh... disappearer." "For a substantial fee, and I do mean substantial, you and your loved ones can vanish, untraceable." "I mean, he sets you up with a whole new life." "What, like a... witness protection kind of thing?" "Beyond." "I mean, off the grid." "New identities, new everything." "No one would ever be able to trace you." "Now, be clear, this is an end game, if you get my meaning." "I mean, there's no coming back." "Sh..." "You want his card?" "Ahh." "God, there's got to be something else that I could do." "Some way to keep everything from spiraling out of control." "Well, I mean, from what you told me, it sounds like, uh, Pinkman is first up in the imminent demise department." "Gus won't risk letting the police find Jesse." "I know him." "He won't." "I'm not even kidding because if you really think about it, you can't even see it, so how can you know just how bad radio frequencies and microwaves and cell phones and stuff are getting you?" "I mean, you could be strolling through security at the airport on the way to visit your grandma or..." "Wake up, bitches!" "And then you get waved through a full-body X-ray scanner, and the next day you could be dead or dying from all the radiation that they say is safe, but there's no way." "It could be because they have to deliver a concentrated dose, okay?" "Enough to penetrate through clothes, and so the accumulated amount could definitely be dangerous to susceptible individuals..." "Hey, yo." "Especially if you're from a rural area and the ozone layer's already thin..." "Yo." "Because of the cow farts." "Yo!" "Oh, hey." "Will you make sure there's pizza here when I get back?" "Enough for everybody." "Oh." "Oh, yeah." "I can do that." "I can definitely do that." "All right?" "Not a problem, all right?" "I can get the stuff, the pizza and stuff, but as..." "As far as the financial situation, you know." "Just hang on, hang on." "Oh, yeah." "You know, and, you know, if there's a concentrated dose, it's really..." "It's gonna..." "It's gonna fuck with your bone marrow, and it's really gonna mess up..." "Because..." "Because..." "Because, especially, if you have cancer, and you know, because if you got to get a bone marrow transplant, your odds are..." "Are 60%." "You have a 60% chance." "Hey." "Oh." "Hey." "Hey!" "Get some dipping sticks too, yo." "Yeah, I can..." "I can definitely get dipping sticks." "All right." "I can get them." "♪" "Hey." "Smoke it up, bitches." "Gotcha!" "Wake up." "Wake up." "What's up?" "What's up with your ear?" "Downstairs now." "Where is everybody?" "I invited your guests to leave." "Know who this is?" "No." "You ought to." "He's been at your house for three solid days." "Okay." "He stole your money." "Okay." "That $78,000 or so look familiar?" "This is it?" "That's it." "Okay, thanks." "You want to know what's next for Little Miss Pissed In His Pants?" "No." "You sure now?" "Yep." "Don't even want to take a wild guess?" "You're gonna kill him." "Is this the part where I'm supposed to beg you not to do it?" "Aw, please, please." "And then what?" "I'm supposed to promise, cross my heart, to, like, straighten up and fly right or toe the line or some other crap that I'm not gonna say?" "Is that what your little show here was all about?" "You're on thin ice, you little shit head." "You know that?" "You ain't gonna smoke that dude in there." "You know how come I know?" "Because you went through the trouble putting a blindfold on him." "I'm going back to bed." "Let yourselves out." "I'm sorry to keep you waiting." "How's the ear?" "Mending." "What can I do for you?" "It's Pinkman." "He's become increasingly incautious." "He's a risk, a liability." "I know he and Walter come as a team and that Walter won't like it." "But something's got to be done." "Got to be kidding me." "Hey, it's me." "Wait for the thing." "All right, this is message number 3." "You better be ready in two minutes because I am right outside your door." "Jesse!" "Jesse!" "Damn it." "Hey, it's me." "Wait for the thing." "Oh, great." "Jesse!" "Oh, this is perfect." "You are a piece of work, you know that?" "Jesse?" "Jesse." "Jesse?" "Hey, it's me." "Wait for the thing." "Where is he?" "Going to ask where we're going?" "Nope."