"Check." "Check." "Check." "Check." "Hey,Dan." "Jerry." "Newsign?" "Samesign,Jerry." "New suction cups." "Come on." "No." "I was" " Iwas actually callingaboutthereunion you know, 'cause it's right around the corner." "...fromBarkledge High School." "...well,I .." "HerbertFarber just hung up on me." "Jesus,dude,howmanytimes have you been married?" "Well, bring 'em all." "MayI speak with Jeff Suttleson, please?" "Jeff?" "Dan Landsman." "From high school." "The D man." "No?" "Nothin'?" "Neil Boitress, D Money." "Dan..." "Landsman." "It was a nickname." "Everyone used to call me that." "Uh, they -- yes, they did." "They definitely did." "Class of '94?" "Yes, there we go." "No, I don't think I still suck." "Yes, it's that time." "20 years." "Can you believe it?" "Well, we sent out a paper invitation and followed that up with an E-vite and a link to the Facebook page." "Oh, you did?" "Great!" "But you're not " " Got it." "There seemed to be a little indecision in your voice." "I'm gonna see if I could flip ya." "Flip you to a yes." "Oh, okay." "That's not very mature." "Whoop!" "Craig?" "Randy?" "So, uh.." "I'mupforbeers." "Whatareyouguysdoing?" "You guys grabbing beers or.." "Yeah,I don'tthink.." "I'mgonnaheadhomemyself." "Yeah." "Somaybenexttime ." "Yeah,yeah." "Alright,buddy." "Okay." "Maybenexttime." "Okay." "Yeah,I 'llcallyou." "Well,I'maskin'you whatthe" "Whatisthefuture ofPirates'baseball?" "Theproblemis hereinPittsburg weknowthatwecan't spendasmuchonsalary, sotheyconstantlyhaveguys  thattheydevelop, thenleavePittsburg." "Well,youknowwhat ?" "Youcan'tbring DaveParkerback." "Yougottago  withwhatgotyou there." "Butdoyouthink" "Yougottago withprospects." "Doyouthink McCutchenisenough toleadthisteam toa WorldSeries?" "Theyinviteyoufor drinks?" "No." "Didyoutellthem that you wanted to go like we talked about?" "Yeah." "Theyjust weren't goin' tonight." "Oh." "I thought they said that last time" "Yeah,well,theyweren't doing that this time." "Zach,wannatellyourdad about your new girlfriend?" "Girlfriend?" "She'snotmy girlfriend." "Just heard this girl Heather likes me." "She'solder." "Itoldhim heshouldaskher out ." "YouthinkIshould?" "Hmm." "I'd do a little more investigating." "These girls usually like older guys." "I think that's what I'm bumpin' up against, but you know.." "...put some feelers out there." "Idid." "And her friend said it's true." "Yeah,well,youneverknow ." "I mean, the friend could be lying." "by all the girls at school to get you to ask her out and then they all laugh and make fun of you?" "Dan!" "What?" "for certain realities of high school." "Goodmorning." "ShurmurConsulting." "MayI helpyou?" "No.." "Comeon." "Come on!" "Whatthefuckisthis ?" "Wherearethey?" "Idon'tgetthis." "Bill,haveyougot asecond?" "Oh,yeah,Daniel,comeonin ." "Ihateto bringthisupagain  but the Internet connection is so beyond frustrating." "Whatdoyoumean,thecord?" "No,notthecord." "The speed." "We got to get with it, you know." "That'swhywe lost the Harkin account." "No." "Iwentto highschool with Dale Harkin and he won't work with us?" "Thereasonwe lost the Harkin account is 'cause Dale's dad is a liar." "Dale's dad is a perjurer." "Andhewantsthingsfaster." "He emails." "Uh- -uh,I'vebeendoing this job for 40 years without a computer, and I'm doing fine." "Okay,butwhathappened to the Bill Shurmur" "I always wanted to work for?" "The Bill Shurmur who always loved catching' that big fish!" "Daniel,I getit ." "I hear you." "I just don't have the funds for these toys." "I can't." "Don't do that." "That -- that's, that's not fair." "Come here." "Alright, you're my guy." "You know that, right?" "Yeah,but" "Andyou'vebeen telling me to think bigger for -- for -- for years, but I " " I need to have a little more cashola first and then I promise you the Dan plan is a go." "I " " I promise you." "Get out of here." "...nowon sale atCabinetsTo Go ." "We'vegotsolidwood, high-qualitykitchencabinets withfeatureslike self-closingEuropean stylehardware dovetailjoints andguaranteedmoisture.." "Comeonin ." "You'll find the quality.." "Theoceanandthe sun ." "Both beautiful...both deadly." "Now, the ocean, I can keep that safe pretty easily." "Butthesun.." "The ocean and the sun." "Both beautiful...both deadly." "Stacey?" "Honey?" "Thisismy beach." "AndI needto protectit." "Now,theocean,Icankeep thatsafeprettyeasily." "But the sun..." "I leave that to Banana Boat Triple Defense Sunscreen for men." "What?" "Youdidn't notice anything there?" "Idon'tknow what we're looking for." "FuckingLawless!" "Oliver Lawless." "Fromhighschool?" "Yes,fromhighschool." "On a national commercial." "He did it." "He made it!" "Zach, that was one of daddy's good friends." "Really?" "No,itwasnot ." "Hewasafriend." "Thisiswhat you woke us up for?" "It's gonna take me half an hour to put her back to bed." "Go to sleep, Zach, please." "Alright." "Jesus!" "Let'swatchit  one more time." "...Sunscreenformen ." "Hey,dad, can I ask you about Heather?" "Notnow,Zach, we're watching." "We'veseenit abunchnow." "It'scrazy,right?" "Yeah,I guess." "Youguess?" "What.." "Oh, right?" "Howmanyof yourclosebuddies areonanationalTVspot,  comeon." "And I'm recording." "Theoceanandthe sun .." "Nope." "No,no ,no ,stop." "You got to start earlier, then hit play, then exit so the bar goes away before it starts." "Okay, let's do it again." "Run it back." "Back it up and give me some volume!" "Mom,saidthatI--  Don'tworryaboutmom !" "I'll handle mom." "Come on, Zach." "One more time, we're so close." "And play." "BananaBoat." "The only boat en route to protecting your skin." "Excuseme." "Good?" "Haa!" "Zachary!" "Hangupthephones." "Hang up the phones!" "Okay." "Boop." "Boop." "JesusChrist!" "Whatareyoudoing?" "Andboop." "Huh.." "Whatthefuck?" "I'lltellyou what the fuck, Randy." "D-Fresh has an idea." "Who'sD-Fresh?" "It'sme,Jerry." "Focus." "I have an idea." "It's gonna take this thing to the next level." "And get every single person from our class to RSVP yes." "How?" "Taj,bringup thereunion Facebook page for me, please." "Everyone gather around." "Gatheraround?" "Comeon." "Chopchop." "Why?" "Whywouldwedothat?" "Pressplayforme, Taj ." "Theoceanandthe sun ." "Andfullscreenit for me, Taj." "Bothbeautiful..." "both deadly." "Whatthefuckisthis ?" "Mm." "Mm?" "IsthatOliverLawless?" "Yes!" "It'sOliverLawless!" "He'sa big Hollywoodactornow." "We get Lawless to come, the whole class will follow." "It's like one of those bullshit charity events." "They bring out the celebrities." "If Dave Schwimmer goes, everyone goes!" "Look,aschairman of the alumni committee -- Thereisno chairman,Dan ." "Okay,thenhowcome I am the only one with the administrator password to the Facebook page, Lucy?" "Becauseyousetitup and you won't give it to anyone." "Whatever!" "I'm telling you he's the answer here, guys." "Okay." "Let'sjustassume that you're right and I'm not sayin' that you are but let's just, uh, let's assume it for a second." "Okay." "How'rewesupposed to get him?" "Yeah." "Mm." "Hehasn'tresponded to anything." "Maybe I should be the one reaching out." "We're old friends." "Um,youwerenot friends with Lawless." "Oh,wasInot ,Randy?" "Well,youcould've just recorded it off your TV." "Mm-hmm." "Yep." "That'sexactlywhat" "Guys,guys,we 'regetting away from the issue here." "Okay,okay,Iwant to go to the other issue then." "The one where you're, like, lying about being friends with Lawless." "Idon'tneedthis." "I'm going to get my friend Oliver Lawless to come to this reunion and then we'll see which issue is which." "What?" "Oliver!" "What'sup dude?" "Haven'tseenyou ina longtime,bro ." "Sincehighschool?" "Hasitbeenthatlong ?" "Jeez !" "Solookingverylikely I'llbeheadin'out  tothewestsideonbiz." "Thoughtmaybe wecouldgrabsomebrews ontheoldexpenseaccount." "Holleratme ,dawg." "Youcanmessagemehere or youcanhitmeupon my email ." "Peace." "D-Rock." "Morning, Shelley." "Hey,Dan." "James." "LosAngelesbusinesses." "DrazenPartners." "Voila." "KentDrazen." "Hello,sir." "Bill, you got a sec?" "Yeah,comeon in ." "Gota very exciting prospect." "This firm in LA just fired their whole team." "I got wind of it." "Made a couple of calls." "Ended up havin' a pretty substantial email exchange with the CEO Kent Drazen." "He wants me to fly out there and meet him." "Here, check out the email." "Kent Drazen." "Oh,well,Iguess-- He'stheCEO." "Ipressedsomething.." "Oh." "Here,no problem." "Thereitis ." "No." "Uh,forgetit." "Just" "I don't.." "Isthatbetter?" "Areyousure?" "No,no." "Youcanseeit." "Please." "Well...righthere,he says how he likes doing things the old-fashioned way, face to face." "Reminds me of you, Bill." "Mm-hmm." "And right here he says, "I would love to do business with your company."" "I mean, that's a strong email." "Youhave an instinct here, Daniel?" "Ido." "This could be big." "Let'sdoit ." "Yeah?" "Yeah." "You, uh, book two tickets." "Economy." "Well,uh.." "...oh, you want to, uh.." "Yeah,I shouldmeethim ." "Oh,yeah." "Well, I mean I hope it doesn't spook him but " "Well,whywould it spook him?" "Yeah,right." "Well,letme check theairlines." "See if I can grab you a seat." "Thursday flights, sold out, sold out, sold out." "Cross-checking with the other carriers." "Ugh!" "Nothing!" "Andyoucansee that on the phone?" "Yeah,it'sanew app ." "We tried." "Holdon." "Lookslike a solo mission this time." "Igotan idea." "Let me just...call Roselle." "She'sbeenmy travelagent-- She'sgonnabe lookingat the same screen I'm looking at." "Neverhurtsto try." "I " " I got to tell you, I " " I, I don't trust the web." "Yeah." "Roselle,please." "Youdidasoulpatch?" "Yeah." "Zach, don't drag the suitcase." "Oh." "Sorry." "Thisishuge!" "Youfoundthisguy ." "Does Bill know that?" "Uh,yeah,he knows." "Areyougonnahavetime  to do something cool, dad?" "Zach,thisis  a business trip." "Not a lot of room for dicking' around." "Get the suitcase out, please." "You'regonnakillit!" "I'm so proud of you." "Whowasdoubtinghimself?" "Iwas." "Andwhotoldyou  Youdid." "Iloveyou." "Loveyou." "Daddy'sgot a business trip." "Ladiesandgentlemen, injustafew minutes we'llbecoming throughthecabin.." "Thisisaniceplane." "Yeah." "GladRoselle was able to get you a seat." "Oh,yeah,rightaway." "I told you, online, it's crapshoot." "I want to go over the itinerary just once more with you." "Okay." "Welandat 4: 40." "There should be a Marathon rent-a-car shuttle at baggage claim." "We go, we wa.." "Youokay?" "Hmm?" "Areyounervous?" "Uh,no." "I haven't heard from Drazen actually." "Ever since I emailed him that you were joining." "Uh-oh." "Yeah." "Listen,nexttime you email him can you add me to it?" "I've seen those where there's multiple " "Uh,yeah, the thing about that is if it doesn't start as a group thing.." "...it's tough to add someone later." "Well,thatmakessense." "Tworooms." "Tworooms." "Thankyou." "You'rewelcome." "Hi,I 'dliketo leave a message for Bill Shurmur." "It's from Kent Drazen." "Meeting canceled." "Oh, hold on one sec." "Hello?" "IsthisDaniel?" "Oliver!" "What'sup ?" "Hold on." "Can you hold on?" "Iguess." "Yousure?" "Yeah,go." "I'llcallyouback." "Uh,notmuch." "You know actuallyI goby Dannow ." "Oh,great." "Right?" "Yeah,it 'sshorter." "Daniel's kinda " "Yeah,man." "Dan's better." "Yeah,thankyou." "I'm glad you like it." "Sowhat'sup ,Dan?" "Why -- why'd you call?" "Uh,well, like I said on my VM" "I'm in town on business." "Okay." "Hey,youwannaget beer?" "Uh,no ,man,thisweek 's kindatoughforme." "You,uh-- howlong youintownfor ?" "Areyoucomin'outatall  againthisyear?" "No,I don't have that planned at all." "Hmm." "Alright, fuck it." "I'll meet you." "Redburyin30 ." "Redbury?" "Okay, is that a.." "You know what, I'll find it." "Hello?" "Sir?" "Hmm?" "Again,ifyour whole party's not here" "I'm gonna need the couch." "He'sparkingrightnow ." "Please just cut me a little slack." "3minutes." "Thankyou." "Dan?" "Hey." "Dude,yeah." "What'sup?" "Youalright?" "Yeah." "I gotus acouch." "Hey,let'ssitatthebar." "Oh!" "I'm not gonna need the couch." "Yeah, it's a little consulting firm." "Um, meeting with a big firm." "Hopin' they'll contract us to, um -- uh, this is so boring." "What am I rambling on about?" "I'venoidea,man ." "Youarekillingit, sir ." ""Banana Boat." ""It's the only boat en route to protecting your skin."" "Fucking sick, bro!" "Yeah." "Itturnedout alright." "Alright?" "Do you have any idea how many people around here are trying to do what you're doing?" "And you know how many of them fail?" "Goodforyou,dog ." "Justlikein highschool." "Uh-oh, there's Lawless." "What's he doin'?" "Steppin' back for the three." "Boom!" "So wish." "Fuck!" "I haven't thought about that in a while." "Hey,youknowwhat?" "You should come to the reunion." "20years,comin'up." "Nah,man." "That'snotmy thing." "Yeah." "Damn." "You must be crushin' on out here with the talent level off the charts." "I mean, the acting thing must help with the girls." "Girlsandguys." "Whatwithguys?" "Well.." "I mean.." "Are- -gay?" "Are you -- are you gay, dude?" "I mean it's totally cool, if you are." "I'mnotintolabels." "I don't know, I..." "like whatever." "Cool." "Cool." "Scoopsection listsseveralapproaches toonlineprivacyalongwith  theconventionalwisdom abouteachone.." "Hereyougo ." "Okay." "I've never taken a muscle relaxant before." "Down the old hatch." "Yeah,man,it 'sagoodbuzz  when you booze." "Oh,yeah,yeah,yeah." "I'm feeling it already." "Alright,sowhat, you got married uh, right after high school?" "College,actually." "Yeah." "We, uh, got pregnant." "And then, uh, bought a house down in Clarkstown." "It's a nice area, you know." "Goodschools." "Then, you married Stacy Polster?" "14years." "Wow." "She was cute." "Yeah." "She'snoHollyJames,but.." "Oh." "Oh!" "Fuckyou,man." "HollyJames." "It'sbeenawhile since I've heard that name." "Ibet." "Oh." "Her pussy, man Yeah?" "Sotight." "Ooh." "Like,almosttootight." "Oh,shit." "Hey." "She'll be there." "Where?" "Atthereunion." "You should come." "Fuck that tight pussy again." "She'llbe all over my shit, wouldn't she?" "Totally." "No,no,no ." "There's no way I'm going to that." "No?" "Okay." "Yeah." "Yeah, I don't really.." "Okay." "Makeafist." "Okay,herewe go ." "Herewego ." "Andwejust have to snort it?" "Yeah?" "Alright." "Herewe go ." "Holyshit." "Is that Dermot Mulroney?" "Oh,yeah,thatisDermot." "Waita second." "You -- you just called him Dermot." "Are you guys friends?" "Well...yeah." "Thatisso weirdhow you guys all know each other." "Oh,he'sbigtime, but the business is small." "Small." "Right." "You should go talk to him." "Yeah?" "Yeah." "Nah,man." "Yeah,go." "Yeah,probablyIshould, I should say hi." "Yeah." "Yeah." "Hey,what'sup ,buddy?" "Oh,hey." "Howyoudoing?" "Uh,dowe knoweachother?" "Uh,no." "Uh, uh." "No, no." "No." "I'm " " I'm just a big fan of your work." "Hey,thanks." "Yeah." "Thank- -thanksalot ." "I'manactortoo ,so.." "Righton,brother." "Um, it's great seeing you." "Ba" "BananaBoatad right now." "Cool." "Um.." "Did you ever do any commercials or.." "No,I startedin , uh,studiofilms." "Films?" "Yeah." "Of course you did." "I'veseeneveryone ofthem ." "Thanksa lot." "Yeah." "Thankyou." "DermotMulroney." "Yeah." "Goodtoseeyou ." "Oh,thankyou." "Oliver." "Yeah,oh,Oliver." "Yeah." "Good to meet you, man." "Alright,nowyouguys.." "...keep rockin'." "Whathappened?" "What did he say?" "Hewasjusttalkingshit ." "He wanted me to sit down." "I was like, "I gotta go, man." "My buddy's here, so.."" "Oh." "Youdon'twannaget  caughtupin that,man ." "Oh,yeah." "He'lljust,he 'lleatup your whole night." "Yeah?" "Let'sgohaveadrink." "Alright,yeah." "Hello?" "Hey,honey." "Whatareyoudoing?" "It's...4 in the morning." "Oh,shit." "I'msorry." "Hey, did you see my Facebook?" "I posted a new pic." "You gotta check it out." "Ugh, Dan, I'm sleeping." "Oh,please,please." "Just go down there to the computer really quick, honey, please?" "Christ." "He's gotta be kidding me." "Youon thereyet ?" "Baby, you on there?" "Ijustwalked into the living room." "Okay." "Areyouon therenow ?" "Wait,isthat.." "Yeah,itis ." "Oliver Lawless." "I'm hanging out with him." "And you know, we just saw Dermot Mulroney." "And he just seems like a normal guy." "Just a totally regular dude." "Well,that'sgreat,honey, but what abo.." "How was the meeting?" "Whatmeeting?" "Oh, right, yeah." "Good, really, really good." "Okay,well, so is it -- is it happening?" "Uh,youknow,it'sclose." "There's contingencies." "I'mcooked,man." "Oh,you'recooked." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "Okay, I gotta go." "I'll talk to you tomorrow." "Love you, bye." "Mwah." "Ugh." "Dude,I 'msohappy." "Yeah." "Bestnightever." "Best night ever." "Okay." "Itwasgreat." "Canwedo it again?" "Absolutely,man." "Hey, take care." "Tomorrownight?" "BringDermot." "Alright,man." "Uh, yeah, I'll text you." "Andthereunion?" "Nah." "Alright,brother." "Hello?" "What's up, man, you okay?" "Yeah,canIcomein?" "Getinhere." "Doyouhaveamini bar?" "Idon'tthinkIhave one." "Oh,fuck." "Righthere." "Isthatwhatitis?" "15bucksabottle, no big deal." "Mm." "Ifucking couldn't sleep, man." "Yeah,meneither." "Man,youeverfeellike  you're just.." "You're just lying to yourself?" "Whatdoyoumean?" "Well,whenyoulie  toyourself you lie to the whole world." "And that's a shit heavy thing to carry around." "It'slike do you ever feel like you're so on the same page with someone that you don't even know what to say to that person?" "Huh?" "AskmewhyI'm here,Oliver." "Why I'm really here." "You'rehereforyour b -- business meeting, right?" "Uh-huh." "That's what my wife thinks." "That's what my boss, who's sleeping right above us thinks." "But the truth is, I came here to get you to come to our high school reunion." "I'm on the alumni committee, Oliver." "I'm actually chairman of the damn thing." "Jesus." "AndItoldthem .." "...if I got you to come, then everyone else would too." "Youreallythink they'd give a shit?" "Areyoukiddingme?" "They would shit themselves." "You're Oliver Lawless." "Yeah,whateverthatmeans." "Okay." "Uh, do you know what I did when I graduated high school?" "Hmm.." "Iwentto communitycollege." "Down the street from high school." "Tookthefirstjob Igot." "I never left home." "I did what every other asshole did." "Butnotyou." "Hmm?" "Yousaid,"Fuckit. "" "You went after your dream." "Yeah." "Andyoufuckin'fulfilledit." "You're the Banana Boat's spokesman?" "Excuse me?" "Banging hot chicks all over town." "BoyswithMulroney." "Mmm." "Youarethebestthingto ever come out of Barkledge, bro." "By a long shot." "Andifyoucometothisthing you will be giving those people a gift that they will remember for the rest of their pathetic lives." "Sowait.." "What'd you tell your boss?" "Oh,no,no ." "I'm so fucked." "I told.." "I told him that there's a CEO in town that wants to work with us." "Whywouldyoudothat ?" "Ididn'tthinkhewouldcome." "It's so stupid." "Whatareyou gonna do about it?" "Idon'tknow." "But he's gonna find out that I made up the whole thing." "Wait." "Maybe he doesn't have to." "Andthankyou,Mr. Drazen, for reconsidering." "That's very kind of you." "Well,firstof all call me Kent." "Okay, let's just get that right out of the way." "And can I just say?" "This man is a superstar." "He -- he single-handedly got me excited about this andI don'tgetexcitedeasy ." "Yeah,that'sDaniel." "Thanks,Mr.Drazen." "Now,letme tellyou  why this deal still isn't gonna happen." "Oh." "Ah." "Italkedto theboard this morning." "We ran the numbers forward and backward." "And " " I mean, we really wanted to make this work but sadly we are just maxed out right now." "Damn." "Yep." "Now, here's what I propose." "We put a pin in it." "Alright?" "We come back next fiscal." "When the flow's a little healthier." "We revisit." "Ilikethat." "That sounds good, thank you -- Uh,justhang,justhang on one -- one second, Daniel." "Um, I won't be able to sleep tonight if I don't say this but there got to be some way we could make this work." "Bill,youknow, they ran the numbers." "The numbers have been run." "Sorry." "I'm very sorry." "Um...howabout if we cut our fee?" "Alright?" "25%." "That'sverygenerous, but, uh," "I'm afraid this still won't get it done." "50%." "Whoa." "Bill,canwe even-- Shh!" "Alright." "Comeon,Kent." "We both know this deal makes sense." "And this guy.." "...Imean,he candeliver." "So, um, I " " I just don't know how you can say no to this deal?" "Mm-hmm." "Man, I don't know what to say." "Sayyes." "Okay,yougotyourself a deal." "Yes." "Excellent." "Thisfeelsright." "Thismakessense." "Wow." "You see?" "Okay, um.." "Okay, well, I'm shaking." "I'ma littleshakyaswell ." "I'mgonnaget the best champagne this place has." "Whoa." "Alright." "Fuck me!" "That was awesome!" "Wow." "Imean,we justhad  it back and forth." "It was like it just fucking evolved, you know." "Thatwasgreat." "That was great." "Ididn'tgo toofar ,did I?" "Imean, that felt natural to me." "Yeah,I mean,youknow, the part where you accepted the deal might have been a little bit." "Yeah,but,Dan,itwasreal." "Oh,yeah." "IfI saidno ,it would've been false, totally false." "He would have seen right through it." "Uh,maybe." "I mean.." "I was buying the whole out of cash argument." "God!" "It was fucking good, man." "No,well,Imean.." "Nah, nah, nah, Dan." "That's fine." "You get to look great." "Nobody gets hurt." "Oh,but,Bill.." "What?" "Youkiddingme?" "Look at him." "He's having the time of his life." "Guy couldn't be happier." "Yeah." "Comeon,look." "We're in the catbird seat." "Okay?" "We can pull the plug whenever we want." "Either way there's no deal." "Just get that in your head." "No deal." "Okay." "Whydon'twe  sit for a little bit?" "Have a little fun with it." "I don't know." "You know?" "Yeah." "I mean, maybe you're right." "MaybeI 'mright?" "Fuck you." "Damn right I'm right!" "Damn right I'm right." "Now, we're gonna celebrate." "Okay." "We'regonnadrink somebubbly.." "Yes,andthen.." "...andhaveagoodtime ." "...tomorrow you call him and say.." "Yeah,whatever, we don't wanna do it." "Yeah." "A weekfromnow , we'lldoit tomorrow." "Norush." "Butrightnow,we're notgonnathinkaboutit." "Probablythesooner the better." "We'recelebrating!" "Youdon'tknowwho thatis?" "Idon't." "Youhaven'tseen hisnationalcommercialspot?" "No." "BananaBoat." "He's the Banana Boat guy." "That's the fucking guy!" "Hey!" "Thatguyis thisguy  and this guy is that guy." "We're friends from high school." "What'sup,A-time." "A-time." "Comeon." "Goon." "Whoa!" "Aah!" "Time out." "Billy,K.D.here." "Listen, man, just wanted to say it was a pleasure meeting you and, uh, I look forward to doing some biz." "Drazen out." "Aah!" "Hey,ladies!" "Givemethat." "That'ssogood." "No,no,no ,no ." "Come on." "The coke." "Oh,thecoke." "Oh, sorry." "Yeah,rightthere.." "Alright, cool." "Thank you." "Alright." "Oh." "Oh,fuck!" "Oh,myGod." "Dude.." "...I haven't had a night like that in a long time." "Oh,man,I" " Ihad  such a blast too." "Dan.." "...thank you, man." "Oh,thankyou,man ." "Comehere." "Hmm?" "Oh, alright." "I'llcometo reunion." "Oh,myGod." "Hey,bro." "Hey." "Itwasfunlastnight,yeah?" "Yeah." "Youwantsomecoffee or something?" "Uh,no,no ,I'm" "I 'm good." "Oh,gee,Ihatethis ." "What's up, babe?" "What are you doin'?" "Justwakingup ." "Yeah,leftmy phoneback.." "Sorry,babe." "Whatdidyouget  intolastnight?" "Yeah, it was fun." "Uh,shirt?" "Seconddrawer." "Yeah." "Itextedyou." "Fuck you." "You're full of shit." "Check your phone." "Babe...howwasit ?" "Ah, come on, baby, not again." "It'stooearly forthisshit." "Yeah, nothin'." "Igotta.." "Justgiveme asec ." "Myplane." "What?" "Hang on a sec." "Alright, man." "Just come pick me up." "We can go from here." "Itdoesn'tmatter.." "Mimosa?" "Mimosa?" "Wow,wow,wow." "What a trip, huh?" "Closin' that deal like the old days, huh?" "Mimosa?" "Herewego ." "One of the perks of first class travel." "Mimosa." "Youearnedit ,Danboy ." "Mimosa?" "Congratulations." "Billmustbe thrilled." "Didyouaskfor araise?" "Notyet." "It 'sjusthappened." "Well,yougotta ask him about it." "This is all because of you." "Iknow,Iwill." "AndwhataboutLawless?" "Did you get him to come?" "What?" "Ishegonnacome to the reunion?" "Possibly." "I mean.." "...he wants to, but it's a big expense." "Have to fly him out here and put him up." "What'sthis?" "Hmm?" "Thereareno buttons on this shirt." "Huh?" "That'sweird." "Were there buttons on them when you bought it?" "Yes,I wouldn'tbuy a shirt without buttons." "Sowhatgoesonnow?" "People just try shit on and then throw it on the ground?" "Step on stuff and buttons come off and then just put on the rack and sell it?" "Okay,I 'llreturn it tomorrow." "Areyougonnasay somethin'?" "'Causesomethingneeds to be said to the manager." "'Causethat'sfucking bullshit." "It'sLawless." "Olli." "D-Smooth." "What's up, my brother?" "Hey, that was some fuckin' fun ass shit out there in LA." "The LA." "It's like uh, a great place, shit." "So, yeah, give me a call back." "I wanna talk reunion with you." "I " " I'm feeling like the more I think about it the -- the lamer it gets, you know, I'm.." "I don't know, I'm thinking about bailin' on the whole thing to be honest with you." "Who needs to see all those.." "...clowns." "So, yeah, give me a call back." "I'll shoot you an SMS as well." "Alright." "Peace, bro." "What's goin' on here?" "What is all this stuff?" "Theseare brand new computers." "Top of the line, just what you wanted." "Oh." "Puttin'theDanplan into action." "We're gonna give this office a face lift." "Hip up the place." "Well,that'sgreat but do you think maybe we're getting ahead of ourselves a little bit?" "I mean, what if the deal falls through or somethin'." "I mean, we haven't even signed the paperwork yet?" "No,no,no ." "It's as good as done." "I'm a very good judge of people and I " " I " " I trust Drazen." "Yeah,I dotoo-- Andguesswhat?" "I sent Dale Harkin an email." "Getthefuckouttahere ." "Idid." "Itoldhim about the Drazen deal and I told him about what's going on here and he wants another meeting." "Oh, man, you -- you scored." "Danny, I'm so proud of you, bucko." "Oh,thanks." "Comeon,enjoy." "This is for you." "You feel good?" "Yeah,I 'mstartin' to feel good." "What's this?" "Dan,uh,letmejust start by sucking' a little shit here." "LawlessRSVP'd." "Andthenabunch of others RSVP'd." "Yeah,andIturned several no's into maybes." "Severalno's now maybes 'cause of you, your plan." "Well,youknow, thanks, guys, but " "Wedoubtedyou,pal ." "We wanna apologize for that." "Shouldwejustskip this bullshit and go celebrate?" "Yeah." "Yeah,we should." "Yeah." "Yes." "Alright,yeah." "Ithinkyoucan doit,dude." "Goodjob,Dan." "You,bigman." "Sowalkusthroughit." "Howdidyoudoit?" "Yougooutthere." "Yougivehimacall ." "Yeah,itsoundslike youturnedhim,Dan ?" "Youknow,it 's a very delicate dance, guys." "It was just, I think, you know, the key was makin' it seem like it was his idea." "Ah." "How?" "How?" "Exactly." "Yeah,howexactly did you do that?" "Youknow,Idon 't even really remember it." "I just sort of flipped the script." "Sort of like reverse psychology and, uh, a subtle -- I did then all of a sudden he was eatin' out of the palm of my hand." ""Oh, dude, when is it deem -- slice." "W -- w -- what do I wear?"" "I said, "Calm down." "It's not for few weeks." "We'll be in touch."" "But, fuck, he's been blowin' me up ever since." "Whoa!" "I...yeah." "Whoa!" "Yeah." "Yeah." "Whoa." "Wow." "Yeah?" "Yeah?" "Yeah?" "Wow." "Wow." "We should do that more often." "Well, what are those?" "Oh,uh,CK ." "Boxer brief hybrid." "You like?" "Yeah,theyarereallycute ." "Look at that tush." "Justthecutest.." "So,Heather, you like Zach, huh?" "Dad?" "Ido." "Mm-hmm?" "What do you like about him?" "Well,I thinkhe 'sfunny." "He's smart." "Super hot." "Dad,thephone?" "Zach,I know." "I'mgettingit." "What's up, dude?" "Huh." "Myson'sin thecar ." "What's goin' on, dawg?" "You get my VM?" "No,man,Idon't checkthose." "Uh,cool." "Hey,Mr.Lawless, I love your commercial." "Okay,justhangon one sec, Oliver." "Butwhy?" "Justforasecond." "I'm gonna finish the call, then you can get back in." "Go, go, go, go, go, go, go." "Alright,alright." "You've put the child lock on." "Goddang!" "Thankyou." "Andclosethedoor, close the door behind you." "Close the door." "Sorry about that." "Where were we?" "I haveno idea." "Oh,yeah, I know the, uh, reunion." "Yeah, what do you think?" "Should we bail?" "Bail?" "Why?" "No,man,I'mdown." "Yeah,I " "I couldbe down." "I could be down." "It's just...my head keeps on going back to when we were in LA partying and saying how fucking stupid it was, right?" "I mean, you even said there's no way you would go." "You remember sayin' that?" "Yeah,butthenyoukinda  soldmeon it ." "Imean,HollyJames." "Thoughtit'llbe funtocrash withyouandStacey." "Ooh,yeah." "It 'sjust,uh.." "Mmm." "Do we have the room, the baby.." "No,worries." "I'lljuststayatCraig's." "Oh,youguystalked?" "Yeah,he says he'sgotplentyofroom ." "Youknowwhat?" "I'm sure we can make it happen." "Have you stay with us." "Unless that's weird." "No,whywouldthat  beweird?" "Yeah." "No,it 'snot." "Alright,man,eitherway." "Oryeah,justthe way  we just said." "Hello." "Okay." "Okay, alright." "Come on." "Let's go." "Let's go!" "Come on, guys!" "There he is." "See my sign?" "Like I'm your driver." "Wherearewe ?" "Whichway ?" "Thisway." "Alright, I'll just put it put it over here if anyone needs it." "CareifIsmoke?" "Notatall." "God no." "Ah, please, go on ahead." "Mind if I bum one?" "I mean, unless you're low." "Thank you, kindly." "Uh, make yourself comfortable, yeah." "Alright." "Hey,uh,realquick, just to clear up any.." "What happened in LA.." "...if we could just keep that.." "Oh." "Oh,yeah." "Yeah,ofcourse." "Cool." "I mean, I don't even know what that.." "Dan,it'sin thepast." "Hmm." "Let'shaveafun weekend." "Yeah." "Yeah, absolutely." "That'swherewe did." "Where else were we gonna hang out?" "Yeah,I don'tknow how you did it, man but you bagged yourself a good one." "Yeah, I had a huge crush on her." "What?" "Okay." "Youdidn't." "Comeon ,youknew." "No." "Yeah,youknew." "I would stare at you everyday in that class that we had." "Oh." "Rememberwith the freak teacher?" "He wears fucking pants up to here." "Oh,right,whatwas his name?" "Yeah." "Oh,Milsomething." "Milman?" "Milton." "Jesus." "Oh." "Dad,canIask you something?" "Yeah,yeah." "In -- in a bit, Zach." "Milburk?" "Milhorn." "Milhorn." "Milhorn." "Yes." "Yeah." "That's right." "Milhorn." "Ah, the memories..." "with the pants." "Milhorn." "Wereyouin thatclass?" "Wehadthatotherclass together, remember, too?" "Which one was that?" "Um.." "I don't, I don't know, man." "Drama." "That'swhatitwas." "And that teacher was a character." "Wasshe?" "Whatwashername?" "Spicer." "Yes,Spicer,thankyou ." "It'samazing." "Sheremembersallthe things." "Okay,I hadto ask you something." "Jenny Lehmer." "Oh,God." "Shesaidthatyou guys hooked up." "Was that true?" "Letmetellyou  what happened with Jenny." "She's,like,always passing' me these notes.." "It'sHeather." "She's maybe too fast." "Shh." "Shefollowsme  into the locker room." "Oh,shit." "Shetoldme  about the locker room." "I'mgettingready to do some crazy shit." "Uh-oh." "Shewantsto havesex  and she wants it to be threesome." "What do I do?" "Zach,notnow!" "What'sthematter?" "Nothing." "Zach'sjust.." "It's fine." "What -- what's the rest of the, uh.." "Zach?" "Ishe upset?" "Idon'tknow." "Youalright?" "I'llgocheckonhim." "No,honey, Oliver's mid story." "Zach?" "Icantellthatstory anytime." "It's no big deal." "Zach?" "Honey?" "Areyoucrying?" "Zach is really upset." "You should talk to him." "It's a girl stuff." "He's not gonna talk to me about it." "Okay,I will." "So what was up with the whole Spicer thing?" "What?" "Youcamein  with the name right away." "Whatareyoutalkingabout?" "Youguysweretryin' to think of Milhorn's name going back and forth, but then when Oliver and I were tryin' to do the drama teacher you just came out and said it." "You killed the whole thing." "Killedwhatwholething?" "I knew her name." "IknewMilhorn's,but Istill let you have fun with it." "Whatisgoingon with you exactly?" "What?" "Youareactingsoweird." "HowamIactingweird?" "Dan,Wi-Fipassword?" "What?" "It'seasier if I do it for him." "Yes,go." "There'slotsof numbers and letters, case sensitive." "Hey,man." "Oh,hey,what'sup?" "I'm just, uh -- Ijustgotoff the phone with your boss." "What?" "Hecalledyou ?" "Yeah,man,he called.." "Oh, dude." "Oh,yeah,yeah,sorry." "So how did he get your number?" "Hesaidhe haditfrom  when I left him that message." "Helearnedhowtocheck his recent calls." "Fuck, he's getting smarter." "What did he say?" "Hewantedto know where we were at?" "Whether or not he should send paperwork?" "Shit!" "Yeah,thisis  out of control, man." "Now, he is callin' me." "You gotta put this into bed today." "Oh,today?" "I was gonna hang with you." "I already called in sick." "No,no,no ,man." "You gotta handle this." "It's uncool." "W- -wait." "Oliver?" "Are you mad at me?" "What?" "No, I'm not mad at you." "I just can't have him callin' me, you know?" "Now, it's just weird." "Itisweird." "Totally." "Fixit,dude." "Gotit." "I " " I " " I'm on it." "Consider it done." "Shedoesn'tsleep, that's the problem." "When she does.." "Dan?" "Sowemoveamouse to the search bar." "Thisis--  this is the mouse?" "That'sthemouse." "Weclick and the cursor will appear." "SowejusttypeBill .." "Lowercase?" "Entersearchbar here." "Myscreenlooksdifferent." "Sorrytointerrupt." "Bill, can I steal you for one second?" "It's important." "Yeah." "Canyoujust give me 5 minutes, please?" "Yeah,I 'llberight outside the door." "IthinkIhit .." "Wouldyouhelphim please?" "Enter." "Oh." "Return." "Andclick"Search."" "Hey,youalright?" "What's with the pink?" "Well,thisis  my sister's room." "My dad made me move in since you were comin'." "Thatsucks." "I could have stayed at Craig's." "You should have told him to fuck off." "Iwouldnever.." "Well,sometimes you got to, man." "Everybody'sgottheirline in the sand, you know?" "Right." "Alright,whatelseyou got ?" "Well,mygirlfriendHeather?" "Mm-hmm." "Shewants to have a threesome." "Guyorgirl?" "Girl." "Okay." "So what's the problem?" "I'mnervous." "Aboutwhat?" "Ithinkshethinks I'm more experienced than I am." "Howmanygirls have you fucked?" "None." "Why?" "Well,I 'm14." "Uh-huh." "What'd your dad say?" "You talked to him about it?" "I'vetried." "I feel like he's weird about sex stuff." "Yeah." "Hethinksyoushould only have sex with someone if you love them." "YouknowwhatIthink?" "I think you should find a way of loving both these girls." "Simultaneously." "Hey,uh,what'sgoin'on?" "I'm in the middle of my internet class." "Didyoucall.." "Wait." "What internet class?" "Well,I gottalearn how to use these machines." "Steve just taught us how to search for someone on Google." "Okay,firstof all,I'm not  even sure that's the best way to search for stuff." "Google has kind of a dated thing, you know?" "It all depends on what web browser you are using and if the, uh, search engine is compatible." "I don't wanna confuse " "Holdon,didn'tyou -- didn't you call in sick?" "Yeah,I 'm,uh,I'mfine." "I'm feeling much better." "Did you call Drazen?" "Daniel,I cannotafford to get sick now." "You'renotgonnaget sick." "Did you call Drazen?" "Yeah,I call" " Icalledhim just to check in." "What's wrong?" "I was just -- just checking in." "Okay,I reallywish you would run that kinda thing by me first." "It turns out he did not love that call." "Oh,why?" "Becausehe'sbeendealing with me." "Exclusively." "He's been, you know, communicating with me." "We got a rapport and now, he just seems really rattled." "Damnit,Bill." "I'm sorry." "It'sokay." "It 'sjustIfeel  bad you spent all this money." "Canyoufixit, please?" "Please?" "Idon'tknow." "I'lltry." "But I doubt it." "He's genuinely pissed." "But I'll try." "Ithankyou." "And again, I'm sorry, I just blew it." "Butnomorecalls." "Youknowwhat?" "I'm not calling anyone." "Okay." "Ever." "God damn it." "Sorry, guys." "Soyou'rekissin' Heather,right?" "Uh-huh." "Focuson her." "She's number 1." "You don't let her forget that." "But you also now want the other girl." "What's the other girl's name?" "Jill." "Jill." "Now,youdon 'twant Jill to feel left out." "Ofcourse." "Alright?" "So you're gonna do one these guys." "Okay,thatmakessense." "Okay?" "Now,let'ssay , things are heating up." "Clothes start comin' off." "We're fucking." "Obviously you got one cock." "So you can't do 'em both at the same time, right?" "Right." "Wewannatry and get as close as possible." "How?" "Youstack'em." "You know, man, like, lawn chairs, one on top of the other." "Likelawnchairs?" "Thinkaboutit ." "Visualize it." "Works." "Uh,okay." "Oh,hey." "Don't forget." "Wear a condom." "Right." "Then,ripthatthingoff." "Hose down those lawn chairs." "Sure." "It'sLawless." "Yo,yo,yo ." "What's up, dawg?" "It's the D man." "Just wanted you to know, the Bill's itch?" "Handled, dawg." "You will not be receiving another call from him, of that I can assure you, sir." "Headin' out of the office now." "Guess I'll see you back at the crib." "And we gotta figure out what we're gonna get into tonight." "You and me, playa." "Okay." "Cool." "Late." "Sowhatdidhesayexactly?" "He was going " "Hedidn'tsay." "They were just going out." "They?" "Yeah." "Craigalreadycameby topickhimup." "Weallhadadrinktogether andthentheyleft." "I said that you would text him when you got home." "Yeah,I 'vebeentexting, Stace." "I've been texting." "It'sLawless." "Hey,um,it 'sgettinglate." "I guess you're still out." "Not getting texts." "If you could just let me know maybe ballpark wherein you're gonna.." "Or whatever." "I can just leave a key under the mat." "The one right at the front door." "I'll leave it under there." "Alright." "Hope you're having fun." "Goodnight, Oliver." "Whoo!" "Oh, man, this is our night, okay." "Bye, Craig." "Later." "Lookinggood." "Later." "Later,dudes." "Idon'tknow ifhe'llkillme." "Don'tworryaboutit." "Oh." "Shit." "Are we being too loud?" "Alittle." "Okay." "Sorry, bro." "We'll try and keep it down." "Actually...hi." "Hi." "CanI talkto you for a second?" "Rightnow?" "Mmm." "Yeah,man." "What's up?" "Sorry." "So...iseverythingokay.." "...between us?" "Whatdoyoumean?" "Uh,I don'tknow,I'm just feeling a little bit of a distance." "Has something changed that I'm not aware of?" "I mean, maybe we should talk about it." "I don't know, we haven't really talked about what happened." "Oh.." "I mean, I'm kind of in the middle of something, you know?" "Hey, sit down." "Uh, fuck me." "Dan, LA was fun." "Wedidit up ." "Mm-hmm." "Butitwasaonetimething." "Oh,yeah." "Iknow,totally." "I " " I " " I don't want that to happen again." "I need you to know that." "I'm not...gay." "I'mnot,either." "Right." "I mean,I'mmarried, I have a family.." "Exactly." "But,but-- but.." "...uh, w -- what if we were in like an alternate universe where I wasn't?" "Whydoesit matter?" "Idon'tknow." "Dan...gotosleep." "Yeah." "Yeah." "Ow." "Ow." "Dan." "Jesus!" "No!" "I'm sleeping." "Get off of me." "Sorry." "Sorry." "It'sdelish." "Oh,I justput ittogether,guys." "Homecooking,man." "Imissit ." "Aw,stop." "Lyingin thetallgrass.." "Goodmorning." "Youjuststayfocused." "Wegotabig night." "What'sgoingon here?" "What'sup,buddy?" "Hey, man." "You remember Alyssa." "Hithere." "Yeah." "All cleaned up." "So, uh, what were we laughing about?" "Z-Bone'sgothimself a big night lined up." "Z" "Z-Bone?" "What is that?" "NicknameI gavethekid ." "Idon'tthink that works at all." "He'sgoingto have his first threesome." "What?" "Right?" "I mean,Iwas  16 before I did that." "Didwhat?" "Nothing." "Uh-oh." "Alyssa, would you like some potatoes?" "Mmm." "Yes." "Iwouldlove some ." "Thank you, Stacey." "Hey,man,he 'sreadytogo." "So,whereis this supposed to go down?" "AtHeather's." "Tomorrownight." "Oh,theyaregoing to be at your reunion." "Oh,theyare?" "That'sperfect." "Yeah,itactuallyis." "So,I 'mjustthelast to find out about this?" "No,man." "Stacedoesn'tknow ." "Pleasedon'ttellher ,dad ." "Hey,he'snot gonna tell her, dude." "He's cool." "Yeah,I 'mcool." "But I should have known about this." "Itriedto tellyou  but you wouldn't listen." "So I asked Oliver." "Oh,soyouencouragedthis ?" "Yeah,whywouldn'tI?" "He's14." "Whatareyougettin' so upset about, Dan?" "You should be celebrating this." "He's a stud." "Youknowwhat?" "I want you out of here." "What?" "Youheardme ." "I want you out of this house!" "Dan!" "D" "S " "Stacey, this does not concern you!" "It'sokay,Stacey." "No,butit 'snotokay!" "Itisokay!" "MaybeI overstayed my welcome." "I'mgonnagetmythings and crash at Craig's." "Iamso sorry,Oliver." "Dan, what is the matter with you?" "Sosorry.." "Soyoucansee thatthe ladies are on the dance floor underneath this beautiful railing." "If you get a chance later, have a free moment of time come and check out the model." "It's almost to scale." "Uh,ifyouactually could hold on that for a second, Louise?" "Thank you so much." "Uh, I just got a text from Lawless and he needs the password to the Facebook page." "Uh.." "Whatdoeshe needitfor?" "Oh,JesusChrist." "Hewantsto postaphoto of us from last night." "Who gives a fuck?" "Dan,you'renotthe  gatekeeper of the Facebook page." "Please give him the password." "Oliverisnot a committee member, Lucy." "Yeah,butCraigis." "Buthe'sjustgonna give it to him, Jerry." "No,I won'tgiveittohim." "Because I can only give it to people who are on the committee." "Okay,everyone heard him say that." "You're on record." "Uh.." "Okay,fine." "R..." "E.." "...U..." "N.." "...I.." "...O.." "...N. It'sreunion?" "Withthreeexclaims on the end." "Goodpassword." "Randy, come take a look." "Oh,look." "He 'sdoingit." "Uh,no,we 'retalking about something else entirely." "Oh,really?" "What are you talking about?" "Justgiveme asecond." "WishI hadFacebook." "Metoo." "Okay,youknowwhat?" "This has gone off the rails and, uh, what are we doing?" "We're giving passwords to non-committee members we're letting them upload unauthorized photos." "Dan,I 'mgonna ask you to calm down." "Lucy,I 'mtotallycalm." "What the fuck is going on here?" "This is ridiculous." "Okay?" "It's one guy and we're gonna build the whole fucking thing around him?" "Wha -- wha -- what the fuck do you care?" "Renina, you never ever talk, and now you pipe in?" "She'sright,Dan." "We- - Okay,sowhat?" "So I made a mistake." "Am I not allowed to make a mistake?" "Am I not human?" "This reunion is for everybody." "It's for all of us!" "Not just him!" "God!" "Okay." "Announcement." "I think I'm out, guys." "Alright,man." "No,I mean,outout ." "No,wegetit." "We know what you meant." "Youknow, it's honestly fine." "I mean, all the work's done, so.." "Okay." "Anyway.." "Whatthat?" "Yeah,look,andthen." "Isthereapicture of just me and him?" "Hey,Daniel." "Hey,Bill." "Areyouokay?" "Alotof stuff,Bill." "Yeah,well,Ihatetopileon more, but, um, we got a problem because I am..." "I am 90% sure that this is not the guy we met with." "And I do not know what is going on." "But I think we're being duped in some way." "And see w.." "...when I click this like Steve said thepicturestaysthe same." "Now, if I could enlarge this then we would know who this is." "But I..." "I can't.." "I don't know." "There's no way to enlarge this." "Yeah,there'sno  way to enlarge it." "Right?" "Fuck." "Maybe if I hit this." "No." "Bill." "Yeah." "Thereisaway toenlargeit." "That'snothim." "No." "Itisn't." "And Google is a great way to search for stuff." "It'sactuallythebest engineoutthere." "What?" "Andyoucanadd someone to an email chain at any point." "It's so easy." "Daniel,what'sgoingon?" "Iliedto you." "There'snodealinLA." "Kent Drazen isn't real." "The guy you met, his name is Oliver Lawless." "And he was the coolest guy in my high school and.." "...Ijustwanted togooutthere and convince him to come to the reunion." "Youfakedadeal?" "So you could..." "take a trip to LA?" "Why didn't you just buy a ticket and go on the weekend?" "Yeah." "Yeah." "In retrospect, that would have been a lot easier." "But I needed an excuse for my wife, so.." "Okay." "I gotyou." "So couldn't you have just told her it was a business trip and.." "...and left me out of it?" "Icouldhave." "Icouldhave." "I could have done that." "Actually, I'm not sure why I didn't." "So what now?" "I mean, I assume I'm fired." "Firedfromwhat?" "I don't even know if we have a company anymore?" "Right." "Ispentso muchmoney.." "Iknow,right." "Right." "Idon'tknow whattosay,Bill." "I mean, I'm so sorry." "I never meant for it to go this far." "Youknowwhat'sfunny?" "I actually liked Drazen." "Ididtoo." "Yeah,youknow it just felt good, you know chasing the big fish again, you know." "Helikedyou,Bill." "That was real." "Itwasn'treal." "Well,right,Imeanhe wasn't really Drazen, but.." "Didyougethim ?" "Who?" "Yourfriend,Lawless." "Igothim." "Good." "Bill...arewecool?" "Havefun at the reunion, Daniel." "Ready?" "Yep." "Dan,thisis gorgeous." "StaceyPoster." "Oh,myGod!" "Oh,myGod!" "WendyFleur." "Howareyou?" "I'mgood." "Um ,it 'sactually, uh, Stacey Landsman now." "You remember Dan?" "Hi,Wendy." "Hi." "Math,Spanishandchemistry." "Oh." "I'mgonnago getsomedrinks." "Oh,okay." "Perfect." "Thanks." "Justawhitewine ." "Yeah,um,two." "Yeah,Lawlesscrew." "Hey." "Dan." "DaleHarken." "What'sup,buddy?" "We'regonnabe seeing you next week, right?" "Hey,I hearbigthings are happening over there." "You know, uh, Sherman tried to FaceTime me the other day." "I didn't even know the old man had a phone." "Yeah." "Hey,didI, uh .." "...did I hear right?" "You got Lawless here?" "Yeah,I mighthavehad  somethin' to do with that." "Nicejob,dude." "Oh, man." "Hey, not to sound gay or anything but I always thought he was just the shit." "Like I would've done anything to have been his friend, you know?" "Anyway,let'sget fucked up, right?" "Hey,Dan." "Hey,fuckin'A,  guys, you did it." "Howyoudoin'?" "I'mfuckinggreat." "How are you doin'?" "Smoking?" "Youknow,whatever,Ismoke when I drink, sometimes I'll have a smoke." "What -- what's the big deal?" "Areyouokay?" "I'mfuckinggreat." "It's a party." "You know what?" "I'm partying'." "Just loosen the fuck up." "Whoareyourightnow?" "You'rewasted!" "You're obsessed with Oliver." "Wearin'thesame underwearashim." "Howdoyouknowwhat  kind of underwear he wears?" "You fuckin' him?" "What?" "I did his laundry, Dan." "Dan." "Jerry." "Wasthatcocaine?" "Comehere." "Okay." "Jerry,Jerry,Jerry." "Let me ask you somethin'." "How about this?" "D-Nice." "What?" "Havepeoplejustcall me that from now on?" "Uh,I don'tknow." "It feels forced." "It'sa littlebitforced." "That's what I was thinkin' too." "Okay, come on, give me some options." "You just have to find what works for you, you know?" "Like me, it's -- it's J-Dawg." "It's obvious." "Fuck." "You've got it all figured out, don't you?" "Don't you?" "Uh.." "I don't know." "I don't think." "Youhavesuch an easy life, J-Dawg." "Let'sgoback to the party, okay?" "Yeah,let'sgetbackin." "J-Dawg wants back in." "Why wouldn't he?" "Whoo-hoo!" "Holly James!" "Lovebirds back together." "Whoisthisguy ?" "Youalright,Dan?" "Isthatit ?" "You're not gonna say hi?" "You're here because of me and you're not gonna say hi?" "That's pretty fuckin' rude." "Whydon'tyougositdown for a little bit, buddy?" "HowwasCraig'shouse?" "Bye,Dan." "You'regonnafuckthatpussy?" "That tight puss?" "He said you have one." "Probablynot anymorethough,right?" "Probably gotten a little loose." "Alright,let'sgo ." "Whatareyoudoin'?" "Excuseusforasec." "Wherearewe goin'?" "Are you gonna.." "We're gonna go talk over there?" "Ow!" "Why do you gotta squeeze so hard, huh?" "Ah!" "Whatareyoudoin'?" "Whatareyoudoin'?" "What's happening?" "I mean, we.." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "Can we.." "Can we start over?" "Let's just start over." "Startwhatover?" "Hey." "I'm Dan Landsman." "We went to high school and never had sex with each other." "Dan,gohome." "What?" "No,no ,no ." "Comeon." "Wait." "Wait, what.." "Whycan'twe justtalk?" "There'snothin' to talk about, Dan." "Oh,really?" "'CauseIthink there is stuff to talk about." "Why won't you talk to me?" "Talk to me, Oliver!" "Okay." "What do you wanna talk about, Dan?" "Youknowwhat I wanna talk about." "Yeah?" "And what do you wanna hear?" "Huh?" "You wanna hear that I wanna be with you?" "What,Oliver,wait, why did the music stop?" "Wouldthatdo it  for you, Dan?" "Tell me." "You wanna hear that I can't stop thinkin' about when we fucked?" "No,no." "Outside." "ThatI 'mrockhardrightnow justthinkin'aboutit?" "How'sthat?" "Oh, Dan, I can't wait to get my dick back in your mouth." "I'msodyingtomake youcome,  sinceyoudidn'tlasttime ." "How'sthat?" "Maybethat's whatyou'relookin'for ." "Oliver- - No,no,no ,let's fuckin' talk, man!" "You wanted to do this." "Let's talk." "Let's get some closure." "How do we end this?" "How'sthis?" "It meant nothing to me." "You weren't even a blip on my fuckin' radar." "Goddammit, Dan." "JesusChrist." "Dan." "I need you to take Zach to school." "I'monit ." "I'll just.." "So, uh.." "...how was your...three-way?" "Didn'thappen." "Oh,damn." "It wasaprank." "No,dad." "It justwasn'tme." "Look,I know.." "...I've been a little absent lately." "You've tried to talk to me about this stuff.." "I just want you to know, you can talk to me about whatever." "And I wanna talk to you about some things." "Likehowyou had sex with Oliver?" "Youheard." "Howdidit even-- Idon'tknow,buddy." "We were out in Los Angeles, one thing led to another." "I mean, you know, these things happen." "Theydo?" "Yeah,you'llsee." "When you're older, a lot of different factors come into play." "I mean, a lot of it had to with.." "Dad,arey- - youokay?" "It's -- it's okay." "It'll be okay." "Uh,I fuckedup ." "I really fucked up." "Mommy hates me." "Idon'tthinkshe hatesyou." "I just think maybe " "Shedoes." "Maybeshe'sjust weirded out." "Areyou?" "Imean,yeah." "It's messed up." "Well,whatdo Ido?" "Idon'tknow." "Figure it out with mom?" "Willyoucomewithme?" "Ihaveschool." "I'm gonna get a lot of shit today and I just have to deal with it." "So do you." "Hey, babe." "Hey,Mr.Landsman." "Hey,Heather." "Heardaboutlastnight." "Oh,youdid?" "Great." "Well,it'sprettyepic." "It's all over Facebook." "Itis?" "Yeah,you'refuckedup, dude." "I like it." "Oh." "Yeah." "Thanks." "Yeah." "Itwasso awesome havin' you here, man." "What a great weekend." "Hey,itwasweirdallthat shit you blasted Dan with last night in front of everybody, but, you know.." "...classic Lawless." "Thanksforthematerial." "That  stuff's gonna last us for years." "Foryears." "Yeah." "Guys." "Oh,buddy." "Icould'vefucked either one of you." "Mm-hmm." "Atanypoint." "Uh.." "ButI didn't." "Uh.." "Whyisthat?" "Alright, fellas." "Sotherewerebuttonson that shirt when I bought it." "And I yelled at that manager.." "...for no reason." "Yeah." "Howdidthebuttons come off the shirt, Dan?" "Heripped'emoff ." "Hmm." "Yeah." "Stace,I 'mnot.." "So,whatwasit, Dan ?" "Can you please explain it to me?" "IwishIcould." "I don't " " I don't " " I.." "If you had asked me two weeks ago what the odds of this happening " "Oh,myGod." "Stop." "I'mjusttryin' to talk about it." "I mean " " I mean " " I, to deal with it." "You know?" "I mean, because we have to." "Right?" "Fuck!" "Isthisabad time?" "Um.." "Whatareyoudoin'here ?" "Iwasjust heading' out and, uh.." "...I don't know, I kinda feel like I needed to apologize." "I said some things -- Yeah,weheardthem." "Look,Stace, you gotta know.." "...I did this." "Not Dan." "It was all me." "Isthatsupposed to make me feel better?" "Well,canI at least come in?" "I'llcomeout." "It's okay." "Dude,listento me ." "Last night, ripping' you to shreds like that.." "It was.." "It must've been embarrassing for ya." "I'm sorry." "Well.." "...thanks for saying that." "InLA.." "...I treated you like a piece of meat, man." "It wasn't right." "Yeah." "Uh.." "...thanks for that as well." "Idon'twannabedoin 'that ." "You know, I don't wanna be that guy." "Yeah,I don't wanna be the guy I was in that scenario." "It'sjustyouput meup on this pedestal, you know?" "It was like.." "I don't know, it was a lot of pressure to deal with." "Huh?" "Itkindamademefeel like  I needed to play the part." "Didn't wanna let you down." ""Playthepart?"" "Dan.." "...you gotta open your eyes, man." "I'm a mess." "That Banana Boat spot.." "...it's pathetic." "That'sa nationalspot." "Ah,yousawmyapartment, man, I'm broke as shit." "I don't know fuckin' Dermot Mulroney." "ButI sawyouguys." "Imean,he 'sasuper down-to-earth dude." "He's fucking normal as hell, but.." "...he didn't have a clue who I was." "Because we'd never met." "I'm nothing, man." "I peaked in the 11th grade." "Hangononesecond." "Hey,Mac." "Relax,man." "Iamrelaxed." "You wanna miss your flight, I don't give a fuck." "It's on you." "Your call." "Yeah." "What'sthat?" "It'syours." "I borrowed it." "After you fucked me." "And you probably, uh, don't remember." "It's just a blip on your radar, but, uh.." "Keepit." "You weren't just a blip, Dan." "EvenifIwas ." "Takecareof yourself,pal ." "DearGrantBarkledge, classof'94." "Funtimeslastnight." "AlthoughI doapologize formypersonallife takingcenterstage likeitdid." "Thatwasunexpected." "Hada greatDJ  who,ifyouask me gotunfairlyovershadowed." "Sorryaboutthat,Tyler." "Butit'sfunny." "Ibroughtit allonmyself." "Ithoughtif Icoulddeliver" "OliverLawless,I'dbea hero ." "Single-handedly savingourreunion." "Butwedidn'tneedhim,  didwe?" "Wedidn'tneedthe most popularguyfromhighschool." "Wedidn'tneedthe face ofa national BananaBoatcampaign." "Weneededasymbol ofsomethingmore." "AndI forone wasreadyto risk everythingI had forthechancetofind it." "Butittookall this tomakeme realize.." "...OliverLawless wasinsideme allalong." "There'sa Lawless insideallof us ." "Sometimesyoujustgotta givehimalittlenudge andwakehimup." "AfterI postthisupdate andleaveyouall  ampletimeto readit" "Iwillbe deactivating thisFacebookaccount." "ForI amtheonly oneinpossession ofthenewpassword." "ButI shall leaveyouwiththis." "Begratefulforwhatyouhave andyou'llenduphavingmore." "Ifyouconcentrate onwhatyoudon 'thave.." "...youwillnever.." "...ever.." "...haveenough." "That'sOprahWinfrey foryourightthere." "Tellin'itlikeitis." "Goodbye,oldfriends." "I'llseeyouall  ontheotherside." "AndI willforeverbe.." "...yourchairman oftheAlumniCommittee." "DanielGregoryLandsman" "AKA.." "...TheD-Train."