"What's going on, Hop?" "You back again?" "Oh, sick!" "Find good one?" "Ten Tigers of Kwangtung." "This is gold." "Bride With White Hair." "Chinese, no subtitles." "You have any early Shaw Brothers?" "This one guy does Leopard style..." "Leopard style, Dragon style fly through air ...fight on water." "Crouching Tiger..." "Spanking Monkey." "I know you." "Another white boy who wants to know gongfu." "Kick the ass." "Get the girls." "Only storage back here." " Where did you get this?" " It was here when my grandfather opened this shop." "A hundred years ago." "He waited for a man to come pick it up return to rightful owner." "Man never came." "My father took over the shop." "Waited, too." "Long time." "Now me." "That's a Northern Temple-style bo staff." "The kind the 13 monks used to save the Tang Emperor." "I've seen it before." "That exact one." "I've had dreams about it." "You know why?" "You watch too much "Hong Kong Phooey"." "Come." "I give you five awesome Bruce Lee movie for very sick price." "You're the man, Hop." "Jason!" "What's up?" " Not much." "Just cruising." " I mean Chinatown." "What's with that?" " Gongfu." " Are you serious?" "I can't talk about it..." "gongfu code." "Look... the new kid's marking time with the hoodsies." "You still riding this loser cruiser?" "Get a motor for this shit." " What we got here?" " Just some bootlegs." "Enter the Dragon." " Bride With White Hair?" " That's actually very good." "Let him go." "He knows gongfu." "What?" "You think you're Chinese?" "You hang out with them Chinks in C-town?" "What's up with you?" "Let's see some, man." "Come on." "Let's see some gongfu." "Gongfu master." "Want some tae kwon do, huh?" "Yo, Lupo." "He hangs out with that Chink who cashes checks." "You in tight with the old man?" "Just shut up and do it!" "It's late." "He's probably gone." " He's not here." "Let's go." " Who's there?" "Gongfu boy." "You back for more good-price movie?" "I told you... best deal in Chinatown." "Come in." "Want some tea?" "Red Sox game is on." "Yankees winning." "Very bad." " Who is with you?" "Friend?" " Where do you keep the cash?" "Where's the cash?" "Come on, old man!" "You stay here!" "I found your Xbox." "Hop!" "Jesus, Lupo!" " What the hell?" " You shot him!" "Take it." "Must return to rightful owner." "Run." "You didn't see that." "You didn't see that!" "Come here, you little shit!" "Lupo, come on, man!" " You didn't see nothing!" " Calm down." " Hey, chill." "Man." "Put the gun down." " Shut up!" "I pulled the trigger, but we're in this together!" "But this little cockroach ain't one of us!" "Excuse me." "I don't know where I am." "I don't know how I got here." "I remember falling." "What?" "This?" "You want this?" "I don't know what you're saying." "I can't understand you!" "That's because you're not listening!" "Behind you!" "I don't know where I am how I got here, or who those guys trying to kill me were." "But what you did back there was sick." "No." "Drunken Fist." "Secret gongfu from the South." "I am Lu Yan, traveling scholar." "What land do you come from, monk?" "I'm not a monk." "I'm Jason Tripikitas, from South Boston." "Is this a dream?" "No." "Where you came from is the dream." "Through the Gate of No Gate." "Is that like a wormhole or something?" "No." "It means you are either a Zen master or you carry something very special." "This?" "It was in a pawn shop, waiting for a man to pick it up and return it to its rightful owner." "What?" "It's long been foretold that a seeker will come to return the staff and end the reign of the Jade Warlord." "Return it to who?" "The Monkey King." "Born of a stone on a mountain of fruit and flowers." "With his weapon in hand, his qi became like fire his stick fighting like magic." "He defied the order of the land but the jade army could not defeat him." "The Monkey King crushed every soldier sent to stop him." "With his magical staff he was unbeatable." "Word of his disobedience traveled deep within the Forbidden Kingdom to the Five Elements Mountain, land of the immortals." "Once every 500 years the jade Emperor hosts the Peach Banquet." "Here, the heavenly ministers gather to celebrate their longevity and drink the elixir of immortality." "One sip of this heavenly brew will give everlasting life free from mortal suffering and desire." "Into the banquet, the Monkey King crashed, uninvited." "The jade Emperor was enchanted by the Monkey King." "But the jade Warlord was not amused." "As master of the army, the Warlord demanded that the Monkey King bow down to him." "He's a bit unrefined, that's all." "Give the naughty monkey a title and let him go." "Satisfied all was well in heaven and earth the supremely high Emperor left to begin his 500 years meditation leaving the jade Warlord in charge by mandate of heaven." "Rather than obey the jade Emperor's command the Warlord challenged the Monkey King to a duel." "High atop Five Elements Mountain in the Warlord's palace the battle of immortals was fought to prove once and for all whose skills were supreme." "Most excellent stick fighting, Sun Wukong." "But without your weapon, you're just a lowly hermit!" "No more weapons." "No more qi magic." "Fist against fist." "The Monkey King was too trusting and believed the Warlord laying down his magic weapon." "Realizing he'd been tricked, the Monkey King cast the staff out into the Middle Kingdom." "Martial art is based on deception my friend." "Being immortal, the Monkey King could not be killed only trapped in stone, where he waits for the seeker to return his great weapon to him and finally free him." "That's what I heard, anyway." "A long time ago." " How long has he been imprisoned?" " Five hundred years, give or take a few decades." "They say when the Monkey King is free, the Jade Emperor will return." "How do I get home?" "You must return the staff to Five Elements Mountain." "You must free the Monkey King." "I can't free the Monkey King." "I have to get home." "Innkeeper!" "More wine." "Geez, Don't you think you had one too many?" "Wine is my inspiration." "In some parts, I am known as the Poet." "Ganbei." "In other parts, I am known as the Beggar." " What do we now?" " How good is your gongfu?" "He who speaks does not know." "He who knows does not speak." "Surely, you are masterful." " Where'd you get that weapon?" " It's a fake." "You can find anything these days on the Silk Road." "Out of the way, old fool." "Hand it over." "Hand over the weapon..." "or die." "Go!" "Lu, help!" "Protect yourself!" "Let's go!" "Where are you going?" " Jump!" " I don't think so!" "Don't think!" "Just do!" "Come on!" "Thank you!" "Such skill!" "Are you from the north mountains?" "She is Golden Sparrow, from the south." "You saved our lives back there." "I don't know what we would have done if you hadn't come along." "She does nothing." "The Drunken lmmortal did not need his life saved." "You're immortal?" "What do you run from, child?" "Bounty hunters trying to stop her from reaching Five Elements Mountain." "I suggest you keep riding west and only stop to water your horses." "You're not coming?" "The journey to the mountain crosses barrens and deserts." "Unspeakable dangers." "Worst of all, no wine." "His elixir." "Every immortal has one." "I'm very sorry." "Without wine, I would perish." "You must understand this." "No." "You must understand this." "This is insane!" " Do you wish to get home?" " Yes." "Then listen well!" "If you die here, you'll be found dead in the world you left behind." "Do you understand?" "My jug is getting low." "I must say good-bye." "Bye-bye." "Lu!" "Wait!" "Let him go." "You are the one to return the staff, not him." "How good is your gongfu?" "He has no gongfu." "None!" "Lu, wait!" "Teach me." "Teach me to fight!" "Swing soft, cut hard!" "At the same time!" "He's terrible." "I've been your weed-whacker for two days while you sit like the King of England." "When do I learn gongfu?" " You want to learn gongfu?" " Yeah." "I'll teach you gongfu." "That's a strike." "Tomorrow I'll teach you to block." "Let's go!" "Swing soft." "Cut hard." "Will I learn the No Shadow Kick?" "And the Buddha Palm Technique?" "There's a guy in "Virtual Fighter 2" who uses Buddha Palm... thanks, Lu and he does the Iron Elbow and One-Fingered Death Touch." "The cup's full." "Stop!" "It's full." "Exactly." "How can you fill your cup if already full?" "How can you learn gongfu?" "You already know so much." "No Shadow Kick." "Buddha Palm!" "Empty your cup." "Hopeless." "It is hopeless." "It is said that music is a bridge between earth and heaven." "That's beautiful." "It belonged to her mother." "My Lord..." "How dare you..." "can't you see I am busy?" "The divine staff of legend." "It was seen in the Middle Kingdom." "Impossible." "The villagers are beginning to whisper of prophecy." "Mortals are always whispering of prophecy." "It's their opium." "What other offending news do you have for me?" "That is all, My Lord." "Summon the Witch..." "the one born of wolves." "Where were we?" "Lu Yan?" "Lu Yan?" "Lu Yan?" "Lu Yan!" "Sparrow!" " Are you all right?" " Jason, what happened?" "He took it!" "The staff!" "The Jade Warlord has sent a bounty hunter." "We are doomed." "That's his horse." "He must be inside." "Why would he take refuge in a temple?" "That's what I intend to find out." "Wait with the horses." "Ah!" "Good to get off my feet." "Long day." "So, where are you from?" "Shandong Province?" "You look like the Shandong Province type." "You come here often?" "That staff doesn't belong to you." "You have to give it to me, or somebody might get hurt." "What kind of monk are you?" "Huh?" "Stealing from travelers." "A silent one, I see." "Or deaf." "I'm speaking to you, monk!" "Praying Mantis." "Very good for catching bugs." "But not tiger!" "You try to steal the staff for the Warlord!" "No, fool!" "I'm on a mission to find the seeker of the staff." "You found him." "He's not even Chinese." "We are all the same inside, aren't we, Monk?" "Heaven help us." "What, you find it a sin?" "Yes, it is sinful not to share." "Cheers!" "How long have you searched for the staff?" "As long as I can remember." "An old man and boy." "They took tea here." "Yes?" "A Soldier Monk rides with them." "Who else?" "I do not know who you speak of." "Men are such liars." "Sparrow. ...where do you nest?" "Jason, go deeper!" "Must taste bitter before sweet." "Horse stance." "Grow roots." "Horse stance." "Very good..." "for taking a dump." "Enough from you!" "He's my student, not yours!" "Two tigers cannot live on the same mountain." "Two masters cannot teach the same student!" "Ma bu!" "If he is really to learn the gongfu he must develop speed, accuracy and power." "Hey!" "I know that." "It's the Way of the Intercepting Fist." "Bruce Lee?" "I will punch." "You block." "Ready?" "What did I teach you about the Snake?" "Now you punch me." "See?" "Again." "You punch him again." "Snake!" "He's not ready for Snake." "Perhaps Eagle." "Crane!" "Crane!" "Okay?" "Stop!" "I've had enough!" "No more!" "No more silent riddles!" "And no more empty cups!" "First, you show respect to your teachers!" "So..." "What about the two tigers on one mountain?" "We can kill each other when it's over." "Gongfu." "Hard work over time to accomplish skill." "A painter can have gongfu." "Or the butcher who cuts meat every day with such skill his knife never touches bone." "Learn the form, but seek the formless." "Hear the soundless." "Learn it all, then forget it all." "Learn The Way, then find your own way." "The musician can have gongfu." "Or the poet who paints pictures with words and makes emperors weep." "This, too, is gongfu." "But do not name it, my friend, for it is like water." "Nothing is softer than water yet it can overcome rock." "It does not fight." "It flows around the opponent." "Formless, nameless the true master dwells within." "Only you can free him." "Behold the tyranny of the Warlord." "He must be stopped." "He must be killed for his crimes and his head put on a post." "One must not feel hatred towards him, or he wins." "If he speaks of compassion for this devil he should go back to his temple and pray." "Our mission is not one of peace." "Go back to your mother and father." "You are but a child." "They are dead." "And she's not a child." "Not anymore." "Her father was a government official who opposed the Warlord." "And so, to set an example the Warlord dispatched his troops into the night." "Legion upon legion poured out of the Five Elements Mountain into the lowlands of the Middle Kingdom." "Screams of innocent people hung in the night air." "When it was over, charred ruins were all that remained." "That, and a lonely child, hidden in the well by her mother ruthlessly murdered by an arrow from the Warlord's bow." "When she reaches the Warlord's palace she will not offer him forgiveness monk." "She will offer him this a jade dart that can kill an immortal." "Long has she practiced." "Vengeance has a way of rebounding upon oneself." "Master of sensitivity." "It is them." "They're headed towards the desert." "They are between me and the River of Sand." "Isn't itjust like King Monkey?" "Summoning a boy to do a man's job?" "Damn." "This desert is hot." "This is not a desert." "That is the desert!" "I hope you know where you're going!" "Crazy monk." "A monk on a mission!" "And where does he lead us?" "Across a desert to nowhere!" "We're not going to make it, are we?" "Even if we do, we still must face the Jade Army." "What if I can't handle it?" "What if I freeze?" "Don't forget to breathe." "If we don't find water soon, we will perish." "Perhaps a Taoist immortal can make rain." "If he truly is a Taoist immortal." "You are an insult to the name of Buddha!" "Blasphemy!" "No!" "I lead you to the mountain!" "Out there!" "Can you see them in the clouds?" "A two-headed lion." "Right there." "See?" "Yeah, I see." "See that one?" "There, coming up behind it?" "Like a wave?" "Looks like the Green Monster." "Green monster?" "You mean dragon." "No, I mean Fenway Park." "They call the left field fence the Green Monster." "It's true." "It does kind of look like a dragon, though." "Have you family, back in this land you come from?" "My mother." "Father?" "Never knew him." "Do you ever long for him?" "Wonder who he was?" "Maybe the only thing I've ever been good at is pretending I don't." "She is sorry." "How romantic." "Men will tell you what you want to hear, Sparrow." "But in the end, they will leave you with nothing." "You survived the River of Sand." "Impressive." "And you, boy so far from home." "I can ensure your safe return." "Just bring the weapon forward." "I don't think so." "Why do you want the staff?" "When I deliver the lost weapon the Jade Warlord shall grant me the Elixir of lmmortality." "An orphan girl, a lost traveler an old drunk and a monk who has failed at the same task for half his life." "Misfits following a misfit in hopes of rescuing... a misfit." "Kill them." "Lu!" "Are you okay?" "Just thirsty." "It's okay." "He's immortal." "Right?" "I mean..." "He is, right?" "Wine." "He needs his wine!" "There is nothing we can do." "What?" "!" "We have to do something!" "I'm afraid the wound is too deep." "He will not survive it." "He needs wine." "He's one of the Eight Immortals." "Wine is his elixir." "Please." "We will send a walking monk." "Don't you have a running monk?" "When I was your age I was a scholar-warrior in training." "My arrow was good." "So, too, my gongfu." "So I was chosen to take the civil examinations." "To pass would place me in the very short line of scholar immortals." "I failed." "You're not an immortal?" "If one does not attach himself to people and desires never shall his heart be broken." "But then does he ever truly live?" "I would rather die a mortal who has cared about someone than a man free from his own death." "I don't want to lose you." "Forget about me." "There is only one Elixir of lmmortality." "It is the Emperor's mix ofjade cinnabar and salts of mercury." "It is forever stored in the realm of the Jade Palace high in the Jade Firmament, rarely touched by mortals." "To reach it, one must take the north road and cross the border of heaven and earth only to face the Jade Army." "I'm sorry." "There is no other way." "Yes, there is." "In two nights, there will be no moon." "We can take the south side of the fourth peak under cover of darkness." " We have to go now." " No!" "He's going to die!" "We go now, we all die." "There is more at stake..." "an entire kingdom." "Your passage home." "We will advance in two nights, when the moon has ceased." "So be it!" "When she met you long ago in a tea house you were a lost boy and frightened." "Not the kind she would stand and fight with." "You have made a most excellentjudgment." "The seeker from the prophecy." "Not quite what I expected." "A man is dying back on Song Mountain." "I need the Elixir." "And why should I give it to you?" "Because I brought you the staff." "The life of your friend for the power to rule a kingdom?" "A most reasonable offer." "This man is a good friend?" "And a good teacher." "The man who honors his teacher honors himself." "However, there is a bit of a problem with your request." "You see I've promised the Elixir to someone else." "But she didn't bring you the staff." "I did." "The boy has a point." "My Liege, you made a promise." "There is but one way to resolve such matters." "A martial challenge..." "to the death." "With pleasure." "The Elixir of lmmortality." "The prize goes to the winner." "Enough!" "The seeker from the prophecy." "I find that quite amusing." "Did you really think, even for a minute, you stood a chance?" "I didn't think so." "She will kill you, witch!" "Not if I kill you first, orphan bitch!" "Ganbei!" "Remember what I taught you!" "The statue!" "Use the staff!" "My turn!" "My Lord." "Who are you?" "The youngest daughter of a family you murdered." "Come drink with me." "No!" "Sparrow!" "Sparrow." "Come on." "Come on." "You're going to be okay." "Jade Warlord?" "He's dead." "I I thank you." "Is there anything you can do?" "Her destiny was written by her own hand." "I am sorry." "Traveler you came far, through the Gate of No Gate to fulfill the prophecy of the mortals." "What do you desire, please?" "I just want to go home." "Very well." "It is said master and student walk the path side-by-side." "They share their destiny until their paths go separate ways." "I'll never forget you." "I guess that's what being immortal truly means." "You freed me, traveler." "Now go free yourself." "So what's it going to be?" "You gonna shut up?" "Listen, pissant!" "I ain't gonna ask you again!" "Come on, maggot, get up!" "You want some more?" "You want some more?" "Uh?" "Come on!" "We don't have to do this." "Take it easy, sir." "You'll be fine." "Hop!" " How is he?" " It missed his heart." "He'll live." "Of course I'll live." "I'm immortal." "Did you return the staff to rightful owner?" "I did." "You're the man." "Will he be all right?" "Looks like it." "I saw what happened." "I work across the street." "You were very brave." "See you." "Absolutely." "And so the legend is told that the Monkey King began his journey west in search of truth while the traveler returned to his world to walk the path of the warrior and find his own truth." "As one tale ends so another begins."