"[Don] Last time on "The Ridonculous Race..."" "New Zealand took many of our remaining teams on a roller coaster ride of highs and lows." "Dwayne tried to impress his son with a tattoo." "Cool." "That's for girl's only." "Noah and Emma hit a roadblock when she put the brakes on their romance." "Ouch!" "But Devin went from super-sad to super-mad and pulled the best friends up from the bottom three to second place!" "Someone's bound to be going home tonight." "But who?" "Can't wait to find out on this episode of..." ""The Ridonculous Race!"" "[Don] Yesterday's chill zone is today's starting line." "First to depart, the king and queen of Ridonculous comebacks, the Ice Dancers." "Two wins in a row, five wins overall." "We're not just back, we're on fire." "Golden fire and the competition's about to get burned." "[both hiss]" ""Go to Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump."" "Huh?" "Buffalo." "Is that a place or a threat?" "[Don] It's actually a little of both." "It's located here, along the foothills of the Rocky Mountains in Alberta, Canada." "Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump was going to be called Concussion Valley but the name was already taken." "Teams must fly to Lethbridge, Alberta, then drive to this spot to receive their next travel tip." "Yes!" "Let's do this." "I had a few "minor outbursts" in New Zealand." "Oh, you weren't that bad." "But don't worry." "The rage has left the Devin." "[sighs]" "I'm not angry at Shelley for dumping me any more." "In fact, I want you back, baby." "And I'll do anything to prove it." "I'll climb to the top of a tree!" "[grunts]" "And hello to stage three of breaking up." "Desperation." "[Devin screams and groans]" "Yeah, this is gonna be great." "Dude." "We're goin' to a dude ranch." "And we're dudes." "We can't lose!" "It's an us ranch!" "[laughs]" "Dudes at a dude ranch." "Pfft, that's fair." "Maybe the next challenge will be for something you're good at," "like complaining." "[growls]" "I am not a complainer." "How dare you call me that?" "You never listen." "And your shirt is so ugly it hurts my eyes." "Yeah, you don't complain at all." "[growls]" "[Don] While our first six teams are off to a serious start, team seven isn't being taken seriously at all." "Taxi!" "Taxi!" "Taxi!" "Airport, please." "[laughs]" "Go, you rotten..." "Dad, your chin's costing us the game." "OK, sure." "This tattoo may be for girls but I shall wear it with manly pride." "Until we win the million and I can afford laser tattoo removal." "Taxi." "Shouldn't we wait for Noah and Owen?" "I mean, we are in an alliance." "What?" "No." "If Noah and I are on a break, the alliance is too." "[groans]" "OK, buddy." "We've almost got a cab." "See, Noah's never had a girlfriend before so he's definitely never been dumped before." "But I'd say he's handling it pretty well." "[gasp] Oopsies." "I gotcha, buddy." "There we go." "[Don] Teams arrive at the airport and it's a mad dash to get tickets." "Turns out there aren't enough seats for everyone on the first flight." "[all sigh]" "[Don] Flight number is Alberta-bound with most of our teams but flight number two will be arriving a half hour later." "I think Noah looks a little better... right?" "I didn't wanna squash my thing with Noah but I had no choice." "You saw it, love turns me into a total nightmare." "Nightmares don't win races." "Unless they're about being chased so you start running really fast." "[giggles] Roar!" "[squeals] Ahem." "[Dwayne and Junior laugh]" "You know, Junior and I have made a real connection thanks to this race." "[chuckles] He even called me cool!" "That was before I found out his chin tat's meant for girls." "You still said it. [chuckles] And it was great." "You know, even if we get cut from the race," "I'll go home a happy man." "Dad!" "Don't jinx us." "[scoffs] Jinxes aren't real." "[Pilot over PA] Folks, a storm over Montana's going to delay our landing." "I bet the first flight was delayed too." "[Co-pilot] Just a freak storm, folks, that only affects our flight." "Coinkidink!" "[Don] Flight number one, carrying the first six teams, has landed in Alberta." "They'll now drive a pick-up into the Wild West." "[thump, tires screech]" "[Josee] Eat our dust, wannabe coppers!" "We're hit." "Tyre wounded." "Tyre wounded." "You'll have to get out there and patch 'er up ASAP." "You're not gonna stop first?" "Ugh." "New plan." "[both scream]" "Boo-ya!" "[crash] -[Jacques] Ow." "What can I say?" "You mess with the bull, you get the horn." "Huh." "Weird." "No sign of the cadets or the dancer dudes." "Two possibilities, bro." "Either aliens got 'em or..." "Nah, I'm gonna go with aliens." "It's simple, Carrie." "If I come home a winner with half a million in my pocket," "Shelley will totally take me back!" "Argh!" "Why won't this truck go any faster?" "You have to put it in drive." "[Don] Flight number two has finally landed, a full hour after flight one." "Go!" "Hurry, hurry!" "[Don] And these teams know they'll be racing each other to avoid elimination." "See the panic on their faces?" "Priceless!" "I only have a learners permit so I gotta have a fully licensed passenger with me at all times." "Noah's breathing so he still counts, right?" "Whoa!" "Whoa!" "Oh!" "Oh, boy." "OK." "This wasn't taught in my drivers ed class!" "[Geoff] Bro, check it out." "We're the only car here!" "We are so in first place." "Thank you, aliens!" "It's an all-in." ""Tip your hat, split your jeans and eat like a cowboy, by all means."" "Working together, teammates must eat an entire pot of pork and beans." "At the bottom of the pot, they'll find their next travel tip." "Whoa." "My fave food to nosh on is totally pork and beans, dude." "[both] Boom!" "I can scarf most things and Brody's got an iron stomach with the taste buds of a dude that doesn't have any taste buds." "We're golden." "See?" "Dude advantage." "But we're in second so all is not lost." "Only our love for each other." "Exactly!" "[bubbling]" "[Stephanie] Beans?" "Beans?" "!" "Beans!" "I'm not usually a picky eater but beans are the grossest food on the planet and should never be consumed by human beings, ever." "That's it." "[coughs] Chicken." "What was that?" "Ugh, I can't do it!" "More teams are showing up." "What's taking you so long?" "Eat, eat!" "[sighs]" "This place reminds me of my grandmother's farmhouse." "I spent a lot of summers there." "We're fourth?" "Oh!" "OK, don't panic." "We can still win this." "Let's hustle-hustle-hustle!" "[sighs] At least he's not crying, right?" "Faster, Ryan!" "Eat faster." "This is an all-in challenge, partner." "That means we both have to eat or we'll be penalized!" "I know that." "I know, OK?" "[gags]" "Come on, woman." "You ate scorpions and worms." "This is pork and beans!" "I am trying!" "[Stephanie gags]" "Check it out." "We've climbed from seventh to fifth." "[chuckle] Things are looking up." "Say, ain't that a ladies' tattoo?" "[growls] That settles it." "I need a marker and a mirror." "Later, Dad." "We gotta eat." "Relax, kiddo." "It's a huge pot." "No-one's gonna finish this for quite a -- -[Brody belches]" "Done!" "[both] Those dudes can eat." "Jinx." "Dad, stop it with the jinxing!" "Oh, there's no such thing as jinxes!" "Those beans are yours." "It's a random botch." ""Whoever isn't holding the tip has to ride the mechanical bull."" "There's a mechanical bull?" "!" "The Bull Buster 3000." "The most dangerous mechanical bull in the world." "Riders have to stay on the bull for eight full seconds." "Once they complete the task, it's out that door, down this path... to the chill zone." "Last team to arrive may be out of the race." "Hah!" "Sweet!" "This is going to be awesome." "Woo-hoo!" "Was that eight seconds?" "It was, like... no seconds." "[panting] Oh!" "The Don Box!" "Hustle!" "Hah!" "In your face!" "We made it." "Safe and sound." "[horn honking] -[Owen] Look out!" "[Emma screams] -[crash]" "Sorry!" "I may need to practice my driving a teensy bit more." "[squeals]" "MacArthur!" "Over here!" "[groans]" "Nice impact positioning." "Ha-hah." "I like her." "[sniffs] A disgusting amount of pork and beans?" "For free?" "!" "Whoo!" "Get your own pot!" "Someone has a bit of a sharing problem." "You're right and I forgive you." "[groans and screams] [groans and screams]" "[belches] [weeps]" "There are worse things to be forced to choke down." "Like a silver medal." "[Brody screams and groans]" "Here's the choo-choo train!" "[chuckles]" "Maybe it's just a coincidence he, you know, went into a state of shock and despair the moment I broke up with him?" "Can you just agree with me at least?" "[Kitty sighs]" "[Don] While the rest of our teams choke down pork and beans, our current leaders are trying not to choke." "The Brode-man's not doing so good." "But no-one else has even tried the bull yet so we're still golden." "[both groan] -[buzzer]" "[Ryan] Come on, babe." "You can do this." "You're stronger and scarier than anyone I know." "Take a deep breath." "[panting]" "That's it." "Just... [gags] [sighs] You know what?" "Maybe you can't do it." "Maybe you're not as strong as I thought." "You're not a winner at all but a loser!" "[gasps]" "I... am not... a loser!" "As a certified trainer, I know how to motivate people who lack confidence." "[gags] I'm confident..." "these beans aren't gonna stay down..." "[stomach growls] -...much longer." "[stomach rumbles]" "Uh-oh, beans are shifting!" "[chuckles] [farts]" "Man, can that guy airbrush his boxers!" "[burps] Whoa, that was a lot of beans!" "What's the challenge?" "[Brody screams]" "Oh!" "Oh, boy." "Bro, other teams are catching up." "No worries, Brody." "Ten times is the charm." "You got this." "Yeah, dude!" "I do got...[screams]" "Dude. [sobs and mumbles]" "But dude. [sobs and mumbles]" "[sighs] MacArthur, it's an all-in." "We both have to eat." "You want some?" "Prove it." "Prove it?" "!" "Look, we... [gasps] Hey, is that guy stealing from the cash register?" "What?" "!" "[messy eating sounds]" "Well played, partner." "First place... here we..." "Whoa!" "See?" "Don't feel bad, dude." "That bull is like, pfft, not beatable... at all." "Come on." "Riding mechanical bulls is way easier than real bulls." "I don't wanna talk about it." "There." "I did it." "Super." "Now grab the tip." "Why don't you grab the tip?" "I wish I'd taken the tip, then you'd be the one riding the bull." "[both grumble]" "[Stephanie] Hey!" "Get your bean sweat away from me!" "Hah!" "[groans] [Stephanie chuckles]" "I'd hang my hat now but..." "I don't have one!" "Wait, bro!" "I have a hat." "Here, wear it with pride and get ready to seriously rock this." "Trust me, there's no way you can't do it now!" "Dude." "Dude." "Whoo!" "I did it!" "Whoo!" "Whoo!" "Awesome!" "Now lets boogie, dude!" "Way to vice that pile of bolts with your beefy thighs, Brody!" "[burps] -[laughs] Yeah!" "Whoo!" "[Don] As the Ice Dancers find themselves behind the Cadets again, the Goths and Surfers are in a race for first place." "Surfer dudes." "It pleases me mildly to tell you... you're in first place." "[both squeal and cheer]" "I don't do emotion. [squeals] [both laugh]" "[Don] As the race for first ends, the race to not upchuck pork and beans all over yourself is still going strong." "Woo-hoo!" "I did it!" "[stomach rumbles]" "Uh-oh. [retches]" "Grab that tip, would ya, sporto?" "I still don't believe in jinxes." "But just in case, there is no way I am letting Junior ride that bull." "Whoo!" "Yeah!" "Bring it, bull!" "I hate you almost as much as I hate beans!" "That's right, babe." "Feel the hate!" "[ding]" "Yes!" "All right!" "Wow, I could almost see the hateful venom coursing through your beautiful veins!" "And your eyes were " "Snap out of it." "Good call." "Thank you." "It's not every day you get to slap someone and they thank you for it." "Ryan, Stephanie, you're in second place." "[both] Yes!" "In your face, third place!" "Er, no offense." "So we're in third?" "Agh!" "I'm never gonna win Shelley back, am I?" "Don't worry, homie." "Maybe next race we'll get first." "Thanks, Carrie." "You know what?" "I couldn't have asked for a better partner." "What happened to you two?" "You were the first to finish the bull ride." "Yeah." "But then we found a skull rotting in the sun so..." "Nope, no, no." "Stop talking." "Forget I asked." "You're team number four." "Go." "[Don] Back at the restaurant, the Ice Dancers finally finish their beans and line up to take on Buster." "Slow your roll, meatball!" "[ding]" "Eight seconds!" "Nailed it!" "Hah!" "[both groan] [giggling and cheering]" "[ding] -[both] All right!" "I have to say, I'm seriously impressed, Kitty." "Finally!" "All right, Noah." "You can do this!" "Just try to stay loose." "Yeah, like that." "Noah's faking it, right?" "He has to be!" "Otherwise, I've broken the most amazing piece of perfection that ever walked the Earth and there's no way I did that, right?" "That would make me feel terrible." "This is the part where you pretend it's possible!" "[Don] It's down to three teams in the race for failure of the day." "[screams]" "[ding] -[screams]" "Are you finished?" "[ding]" "Way to go, buddy!" "You're fifth." "Whoo!" "Sixth place." "[both] All right!" "Yes!" "You're up again, Dad." "You know, cos there's no-one else left." "[sighs] You were right, Junior." "I jinxed us." "It's hopeless." "No, it isn't, Dad." "You can still do this!" "If you stay on the bull this time and we run super fast," "we might beat the pros to the carpet!" "You think?" "Yeah." "Sure." "Maybe." "Junior, the feeling of blood pooling in my spine calls for emergency care but the feeling of your unwavering faith in me is all the medicine I need." "This one's for Junior!" "Please don't kill me!" "Please don't kill me!" "[ding]" "[laughs] I'm alive!" "Whoo!" "[Dwayne groans]" "Jacques, Josee, you're seventh place." "[both cheer]" "[Don] With our final team besting the bull, it's a foot race to be not last." "Sort of congratulations, Reality TV Pros." "You're in eighth place!" "Yay!" "[groans]" "Noah?" "I'm so sorry I broke you." "I didn't mean to." "I still really like you and I want us to be together." "[gasps] You..." "You do?" "Yes." "I just can't do the romance thing until the race is over." "But after I win, you and I and so on." "Great!" "So when one of us wins " "Are you not listening?" "When my team wins." "So if we win, she won't date you?" "I guess not." "Wow, that is cold." "I know." "Isn't she just the best?" "Dwayne." "Junior." "You're the last team to arrive." "[sighs]" "But I'm happy to tell you that " "It's a non-elimination round?" "We get to stay!" "All right!" "Woo-hoo!" "We get to stay!" "No, no." "You're cut from the competition." "I'm sorry." "Well, what was it you were happy to tell us?" "I can't recall." "That's what happens when you interrupt people." "Sometimes they forget what they we're saying." "[sighs]" "Thanks for this, Dad." "It was a lot of fun." "[Dwayne] Ah, I can't be too upset." "The race has really changed Junior and me." "My son's going home a man." "[Junior] And thanks to his new tattoo, my dad is going home a woman." "[both giggle]" "[Dwayne chuckles] I'm gonna grow a beard." "[Junior] Probably for the best." "[giggles] Hey!" "You wanna go home and binge-watch "Total Drama:" "Pahkitew Island"?" "Only if we can laugh until soda squirts out your nose." "Of course we can, son." "Of course we can."