"(man) please state your name for the record." "Violet Maryann Turner." "Why are we here today, dr." "Turner?" "I'm here for my son lucas." "I want to share custody of him." "Your son is almost a year old, yes?" "In two weeks." "In--in 2 weeks, he'll be 1." "So why now?" "After virtually no contact for almost a year," "Why are you now ready to be a mother to lucas?" "âª" "(violet) I'm here for the job interview." "Dr. Sicher is waiting for you." "Right this way." "Dr. Turner is here." "Dr. Turner." "Hi there." "I'm dr." "Ellen sicher." "Come on in." "Boy, your rÃ©sumÃ© looks great." "You have no idea." "Oh, I have been looking and looking" "For someone who shares my philosophy" "To take over for me while I'm on maternity leave." "So can I ask what, uh, what brings you to new york?" "E-excuse me?" "Can I ask why you're leaving l.A." "And your current practice?" "Oh, um, well, I was..." "Um, on vacation in costa rica," "And, um..." "I'm sorry." "I didn't..." "I didn't know you were... âª" "(voice breaking) you're having a baby..." "Which is, um..." "Violet." "Yes." "Uh..." "You're crying." "I'm sorry." "I'm so sorry." "I will go." "No, no." "Violet..." "Do you want to talk?" "âª" "(toilet flushes)" "(man) âª and carry me away âª âª to the place âª âª" "(addison) so what do you want me to say?" "(pete) just do what the lawyer said." "Be respectful and emphasize the fact that I've been" "The constant caregiver in lucas' life." "So you want me to be nice?" "Be honest." "No, see, honest isn't nice." "I mean, this is a custody ttle." "It'sot nice." "You're just nervous." "No, I'm not, pete." "I mean, you're trying to keep lucas out of violet's hands," "And I want to help, but, you know," "I work with violet." "You know, I mean, she's a friend of mine..." "Sort of." "So, you know, you gotta tell me what you want, pete" "Honest or nice?" "Be honest." "âª" "(woman) do you believe" "That violet turner is a fit mother?" "(judge) please answer the queson." "âª" "No." "I do not believe violet turner is a fit mother." "âª" "Captioned by closed captioning services, inc." "(judge) ms." "Broome?" "(broome) mr." "Parker, you have an 8-year-old daughter?" "(dell) yes." "Your wife died in a fire caused by her drug abuse" "A fire that your daughter almost died in, too, correct?" "Uh, I thought my wife was clean." "Uh, I didn't--I didn't know." "Mr. Parker, I'm sorry, but isn't it true that you" "Didn't allow your daughter to say good-bye" "To her dying mother?" "(inhales sharply)" "Mr. Parker?" "Y-uh... (sighs)" "Heather's--my wife's face was badly burned," "And I didn't want--I wanted to spare my daughter" "Seeing her that way." "Is that the reason?" "Or did you feel your wife was unstable" "And undeserving of seeing your daughter?" "No further questions, your honor." "She looks upset." "I'm gonna go in now." "No, leave her alone." "She got beat up in court today" "Char." "Hey, can I get you some food?" "Or a martini?" "You don't give someone liquor who's clearly upset about" "Liquor is exactly what you offer someone-- I'm fine." "I'm fine." "I'll be fine." "I just need to, um..." "Hey, uh, this is the third message I'm leaving." "Please come back." "I need, uh..." "I need someone who's on my side." "I'm on her side." "You sure about that?" "(sighs)" "So when violet found out she was pregnant," "You moved in with her?" "Yes, I wanted to lend her my support." "You're a very good friend, dr." "Freedman." "It's easy to be a good friend to violet." "She's a good frien me." "Dr. Freedman," "Did you meet your girlfriend on an internet sex site?" "I met my ex-girlfriend on a site" "Where adults go to meet other adults." "Do I--do we--is this" "Ms. Broome, unless you can get there real fast..." "Different area, then." "You have a reputation as a pediatrician who'd go" "To any length to protect his patients, do you not?" "I believe in keeping my patients safe." "In fact, didn't you recently spend some time in jail" "Protecting a child you believed was being abused?" "Yes." "I'm proud of that." "Are you really prepared to turn a baby over" "To a woman with obvious mental health issues?" "(woman) objection." "Argumentative." "Sustained." "If lucas were your patient" "And not the child of your closest friend," "Would you think that shared custody" "Would be in his best interest?" "Given everything she's been through," "You really think violet turner is a fit mother?" "I'm just saying" "That maybe the two of you should talk, pete." "You know, there's a way to be decent about this." "Do you have any e-mails from violet where she mentions lucas?" "We work in the office next door to each other." "We don't e-mail." "I'm just asking." "Well, I'm just telling you." "What do you want me to do, lose this thing?" "Do you want me to-- to hand over my kid to her" "For half of every week?" "Shared custody is not the worst thing" "No." "Pete" "No!" "(crying)" "Okay, shh, shh." "Okay, shh." "Shh." "It's okay." "Here." "Okay, here." "It's okay." "Shh, shh, shh." "Give him to me." "Give him to me." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "(continues crying)" "Oh, sweetie, it's okay." "I'm sorry." "(continues crying)" "Oh, I'm sorry." "(kisses)" "(paper rustles)" "Where is she?" "She said she'll be here." "She'll be here." "(speaking inaudibly)" "Your honor, our next witness is traveling" "From quite a distance." "S just moments away." "I'm afraid if your witness is not here, then" "I call dr." "Naomi bennett as our next witness." "It's easy for everyone else" "Just to talk about how violet should just get on with her life" "And just move on," "But when life throws you a curveball, it's not easy." "So you can empathize with violet's, uh," "Inability to move on?" "I do." "Because of your relationship with your own daughter?" "You are estranged, correct?" "Much the same way that violet is estranged from her son." "We were for a brief time, but things are better now." "So you support" "Your 15 year old's pregnancy and marriage?" "No." "Are you talking with her?" "We just n-need a little space." "Do you believe that your need for space" "From your own child" "Allows you to accept violet's behavior toward her child?" "No, no, no, that is not it." "No, I was..." "I was with pete." "I was there when he found her," "Just minutes after the tack..." "I mean, and her baby in a pool ojust gone.Blood." "(exhales)" "(voice breaking) there are no words" "To adequately convey" "The horror of what she went through" "And what I witnessed." "The image of her like that..." "It still haunts my dreams," "And, uh..." "And so does the guilt" "Of being powerless to help her" "Or help her find lucas." "If that still terrorizes me, I-I can't even imagine..." "How it's affected violet." "And, uh, I have compassion for her..." "For my friend." "(mouths words)" "Whew." "(indistinct conversations)" "(ellen) so what happened when you opened the door" "And katie was on the other side of it?" "I already told you." "I was attacked." "Yeah, but what happened?" "What did katie do?" "How did you react?" "What were you feeling during the attack?" "I can't talk about the attack anymore." "You've discussed it?" "With whom?" "I have worked through the attack," "And now I want to focus on getting back to my life." "We have talked about this." "I mean, I've told you that." "I--no." "Just..." "No." "Violet, you cannot shrink yourself." "I know that you want to have control over this situation," "Most likely because you didn't have control over the attack." "I get it." "But it's not gonna help you get through this." "Now you've been seeing me for some time now." "And I assume that you..." "Came to me because you want my help." "So let me help you." "Okay?" "Okay." "So..." "What happened when you opened the door?" "(rainfall)" "Katie jabbed a needle into my arm." "And then?" "(thunder rumbles)" "Sometimes p.T.S.D." "Causes flashbacks or intense fear," "Hypervigilance, numbness or avoidance." "Have you treed violet turner for p.T.S.D.?" "Counseled her?" "Well, I'm her friend, her ex-boyfriend," "And..." "It's a funny story, actually." "I... (laughs)" "I was almost lucas' father." "Excuse me." "How exactly is that possible?" "Well, violet and I were dating" "When she srted sleeping with pete." "Uh, which is to say, uh..." "Not that she's promiscuous." "She's not." "It's just that she, um..." "Well, it was a confusing time for all of us, I think." "And, um..." "My point was" "That none of us knew who the father was" "Until a few weeks after lucas was born," "So I naturally became very attached to him." "Dr. Turner didn't know dr." "Wilder was the father" "When she turned the child over to him?" "Not definitively, no." "Back to the question." "Have you ever treated violet turner?" "No." "Given our history," "Being her therapist would be a breach of ethics." "So given her behavior," "Her inability to connect with her son" "After the attack," "Do you believe that violet turner" "Suffers from p.T.S.D.?" "Objection." "Dr. Wallace is not called as an expert witness" "Nor as dr." "Turner's psychiatrist." "You don't have to answer that." "(speaking inaudibly)" "I suspect violet suffers from p.T.S.D." "Hey." "Thank you so much for coming." "Oh, god." "I wouldn't have missed this for the world." "Oh, I'm just so sorry." "I'm so sorry" "That you have to go through all this." "And, uh, I hope this isn't my fault." "When you were gone and you couldn't be there for lucas..." "I..." "I encouraged addison to be there." "Thank you." "Thank you." "We're gonna fight this." "We're gonna fight, and you're gonna get your son back." "Okay." "Absolutely." "Alright?" "All right." "We call dr." "Amelia shepherd to the stand." "P.T.S.D. Causes identifiable neural correlates." "Uh, and we can see them clearly in an m.E.G. Scan." "Here we see that violet has" "High abnormal activity in the temporal lobes" "As well as atrophy in the hippocampus." "Both are consistent with p.T.S.D." "Can you interpret these findings?" "There is evidence that p.T.S.D. Is a physical disease." "Which means?" "It's treatable." "Talk therapy, antianxiety drugs?" "Both are traditional routes." "Personally, I would treat it with beta-blockers." "P.T.S.D. Manifests with a host of physical symptoms" "Rapid heart rate, shortness of breath." "Take away the physical response from the memories," "And you've taken away the condition." "So what you're saying is, dr." "Turner could be treated" "As easily as prescribing a heart medication?" "That's what I'm saying." "This is a physical ailment." "War vets, victims of abuse," "People who have beenn accidents--they all get it." "We're not trying to take their kids away from them." "Give the woman back her child." "(addison) pete" "Okay, you..." "Are not welcome here anymore." "Whoa." "First, screw you," "And second, this is not your house." "This is addison's house." "Come on." "Amelia" "Look, look, we have to go pick up lucas anyway." "Let's just stay at your house tonight." "No." "Pack and leave." "Pete, let's just-- I was called to testify, I got on the stand, I told the truth." "You've been out of medical school for five minutes." "Okay" "You come to my custody hearing, a custody hearing for my son..." "Who do you think--what?" "Okay, you guys-- I am a board certified neurosurgeon." "And you start spouting some psuedo-sentific crap-- (amelia and addison yelling over each other)" "U know what?" "I'll be at my house if you need me." "Addie, what are you doing?" "I mean, you are letting him" "It's his child." "(door opens and closes)" "Yeah?" "Well, the way he's acting," "Maybe he's the one with p.T.S.D." "(woman) when you say "abandonment"" "That's what it was." "Violet abandoned our child." "That's a strong word, "abandonment."" "Another strong word is "hate."" "Have you ever hated anyone, dr." "Wilder?" "Not that I know of." "You were married, correct?" "Yes." "What happened to your wife?" "(clears throat) she died." "How did you feel about her death?" "Did you ever say that you hated your wife" "And you felt nothing about her death?" "Yes." "I don't care who she's been to you in the past." "Today violet is your enemy," "And we're fighting for lucas' life." "Now do you want to win this or not?" "Violet turner's a great mother." "(broome) it doesn't give you pause" "That violet gave her baby away to pete?" "Violet knew her limits and asked for help." "She did more for her child thant mothers do." "She coulda kept her child, hired a nanny, spent her days" "Locked in her room with the vapors like my mother," "But she didn't." "Do you think" "I'm not finished." "She handed lucas over to his father" "Out of love for her child." "Now she's spending all her time" "Apologizing for taking care of herself." "As far as I'm concerned," "She doesn't have to apologize to anyone for anything." "She's getting on with her life the best way she can." "She's ready to spend time with her son." "I don't see why we aren't all supporting her." "So violet talks to you about wanting to be with lucas," "Shows you photos of him, talks about milestones?" "Milestones?" "God, no." "Violet and I are friends 'cause she isn't that kind of mother." "I hate babies." "So does she." "I mean..." "We don't like other people's babies." "But she likes lucas." "She does." "She loves him." "(indistinct conversations)" "Violet hates babies." "That's a nice one." "Really?" "After what you said," "You're coming to discuss my testimony?" "She was counting on us." "At least I tried to be loyal." "I know I messed it up, but you didn't even try." "So don't you come and try to push your guilt on to me." "I'm not taking any of it." "Why don't you stuff it where the sun don't shine?" "(woman) do you think addison ntgomery" "Is a good influence in lucas' life?" "I need a verbal answer, dr." "Bennett." "I-I don't know." "Have you seen her with lucas?" "Yes." "Have you seen her feeding him and bathing him," "Playing with him?" "Yes." "Does she seem comfortable?" "Enough." "Dr. Bennett, can you think of any reasons" "Why addison montgomery" "Might not be a good influence on lucas..." "Or reasons why violet turner would be?" "Dr. Bennett," "She asks, you respond." "Right." "You know what, your honor?" "We're done here." "Sam." "Sam, what was that?" "They asked me questions, and I answered." "That was it?" "That was all you had to give?" "You know this was important to me." "I couldn't." "You should've gotten up there-- I-I wanted to..." "Well, why not?" "And I-I couldn't." "B-because of me?" "Because you--- I'm in love with addison...." "I love her, and at the same time, I hate her." "Seeing her with pete is killing me." "Last night, I was out on my deck," "And I could hear all three of them next door." "And lucas was laughing, and if I had gotten up on the stand" "And said what I wanted to say..." "I want to tear them apart." "I want to take that baby away from them." "But it's for the wrong reasons." "So I'm sorry." "I'm so sorry." "But I-I need to be able to look myself in the mirror" "And know that I'm a good man." "I'm trying to be a good man." "So I said nothing..." "Because if I had said what I wanted to say," "I wouldn't have been testifying for you." "I would've been testifying for me." "(broome) dr." "Turner," "If you win, if partial custody is granted to you," "What do you look forward to with lucas?" "What are you looking forward to?" "I... (chuckles)" "I can't wait to watch him sleep again." "After he was born, uh, b-before I gave him to pete," "I used to watch him sleep, and he just..." "He looked so peaceful." "And, uh..." "Well, now he's trying to walk and form words" "And, um..." "And I want to be a part of all that." "I don't wanna..." "I don't wanna miss anything else." "Do you want to take a minute..." "Get some water?" "No, I'm okay." "So you're glad you had lucas." "'cause you did think about aborting him, didn't you?" "Just like you aborted a number of other babies, right?" "Here." "Me." "(speaks indistinctly)" "What if I lose?" "We're not gonna lose." "We." "What if I lose?" ""we." "We." what if we lose?" "What if we lose?" "It's not losing anyway, all right?" "Violet is lucas' mom." "It's not like she's gonna hurt him." "It's not like I said she was gonna drown him in the bathtub." "You know what?" "It's past his bedtime." "He should've been asleep, like, a half-hour ago." "I'm gonna put him down, okay?" "(doorbell rings)" "It's just--we don't need her, this." "We don't need this." "Can you, uh, get the door, please?" "Yeah." "All right." "Ready?" "Say good night." "Good night." "Say night-night." "Night, big man." "Night-night, daddy." "I went to your house first, but you weren't there." "So I figured, I mean, addison's, it" "I mean, I know it's late and my lawyer would... (clears throat) be upset if she knew that I was here, but-- what?" "H-how did we get here, pete?" "I mean, here, in court." "You sued me." "I know that, but isn't..." "Isn't there a more civil way of doing this?" "Your lawyer knows all these personal things about everyone." "So does yours." "Well, that's why I'm asking, how did we get here?" "Violet, you put lucas in my arms" "And made me solely responsible for his well-being." "I have to do what I think is right for him." "Really?" "Because it feels like..." "The way-- the way you look at me," "****" "****" "Well, sam sa a thing." "He said that he loves addison, but that he hates addison." "So it makes it hard for him to..." "Look, clearly, you hate me." "But are--are you doing all this because... (sighs) are you still in love with me?" "(indistinct conversations)" "Violet." "Leave me alone." "Hey, hey, come on." "Come here." "Hey, what the hell was that?" "What?" "Fellas, keep it together." "That's good advice." "No, screw that." "Do you have any idea what you just did?" "You don't understand." "That's crap, cooper." "I have a daur, okay?" "That's crap." "Where is she?" "Inside." "Hey, maybe we should give her a minute?" "You okay?" "(sighs)" "(exhales)" "You want me to fire cooper?" "(laughs) 'cause I can." "I'll fire arlotte." "I been looking for a reason to fire charlotte." "Say the word, and I will." "(sighs)" "Who knew?" "Who knew that everyone thought I wasuch a horrible person?" "What'll happen if I lose?" "******" "What would you tell a patient" "If she were going through this?" "I don't know." "Come on." "Yeah, you do." "Yeah, you do." "(whispers) I'm still in love with pete." "(sighs)" "(normal voice) don't tell anyone." "Okay?" "Okay." "(ellen) okay, let's go back." "Let's go back." "At what point during the attack did your mind drift to lucas?" "Why is this significant?" "Because we've recounted this numerous times," "And at no point have you mentioned your baby," "Not once, and I want to talk about him." "Okay, so let's go back." "You're on the floor-- well, blood was pouring out of my body" "And I was ruining the rug." "I don't know." "Stick with me, violet." "(sighs)" "Just stay with me." "Do you know how much I begged her not to do it?" "Do what?" "To cut him out of me." "(indistinct convsations)" "***********" "What am I gonna say, no?" "(sighs) how did we get here?" "How did we let it get this bad?" "I don't know." "You like playing house with my son, addison?" "Violet" "There are two people who knew about my abortions," "And I am sure naomi was not the one who told." "I-- you want to fight dirty?" "Let's fight dirty." "But you started it." "(chuckles)" "Remember that when you're on the stand." "(broome) do you believe" "That violet turner is a fit mother?" "Please answer the question." "No, I do not believe" "That violet turner is a fit mother." "She's made no contact with the baby." "I've tried to fill that void." "I know I'm not hisother." "I didn't, uh..." "It was not my intention to, but it just sort of happened," "And, um..." "I-I'm glad that it did." "He's a very special little boy." "Well, I commend you, dr." "Montgomery." "*******" "Of raising another woman's child." "No further questions." "Would you call yourself" "An honest person, dr." "Montgomery?" "Yes, I would." "You were married, right?" "Yes, I was." "I'm--I'm divorced now." "And why did your marriage dissolve?" "Objection." "Why is dr." "Montgomery's marriage relevant?" "Well?" "It goes to her credibility, your honor." "Answer, dr." "Montgomery." "I, uh..." "Had an affair, and my husband left me." "And who did you have an affair with?" "He was my husband's best friend." "Didn't you also have an affair with your patient's husband," "A, uh..." "Dr. Noah barnes, I believe" "We never slept together." "Broken your vows when it served you, haven't you?" "," "Which begs the question," "How much trust can we put in your credibility here today?" "Objection." "Seriously, this is abusive." "All right, moving on." "Why don't you have children, dr." "Montgomery?" "I can't." "Did you ever want to have children?" "Yes, I tried, but I was not able to." "So would you lie on the stand to keep lucas," "To protect your one last chance at motherhood?" "Object" "No, I want to answer." "You're right." "I'm a cheater and a husband stealer," "************" "So good times." "I..." "I never wanted any of this to happen." "I never wanted to hurt violet." "Yes, she's a mess." "I'm a mess, too." "I..." "I'm here for lucas." "He's a baby, so he can't speak for himself." "But I'm pretty sur," "He'd say that he wanted to feel loved and safe" "And have cereal for dinner." "I just want lucas to be happy." "So if that means you tearing me apart" "And making me look like the most horrible person on earth," "Then please, go ahead and do it," "Because..." "Lucas is worth it..." "To me." "So..." "Next question..." "Ms. Gibson?" "(violet) are you still in love with me?" "I'm sorry..." "Everything that's happening has hurt you." "But I can't let you hurt lucas the way you hurt me." "I have to protect him." "You--you didn't answer the question." "What do you expectm me?" "I don't know." "I-I mean, we made a baby together." "I mean, the least we could offer each other is honesty." "Honest?" "Fine." "I'm done." "I have moved on." "I'm over you." "I wish you well." "Best of luck in all your future endeavors." "****" "And you walked away from our child." "I have moved on." "I don't love you." "You want me to be honest?" "Honesty isn't nice." "You were fantastic on the stand today." "If that doesn't win it for us, I don't know..." "Is the baby asleep?" "What?" "Is Lucas asleep?" "Yeah, he went down fine." "(exhales deeply)" "How did your lawyers know about violet's abortions?" "Answer me." "I had to do something to help us win." "(scoffs) I don't even know what to say to you." "Wh" "Pete, I don't know." "Addison, why don't you start" "I don't know." "It's like you--you have done" "Some horrible things during this trial, but I told myself" "It's because, you know, you're worried and you're scared." "But now--now it's like you've shut down pete" "And become this cold, hard, mean-- you know what?" "Mind your own business." "Mind my own business?" "Yeah, stay outta this." "This is my business." "You made it my business" "When you put your son in my arms." "If I didn't love that kid, I'd sit back" "And I'd watch you and violet tear each other to shreds." "But I do love him, and that is who I am concerned about here." "And I'm not?" "You better think about what you're gonna say to him" "When he asks you one day, "why did you do this to my mother?"" "And what are you gonna say?" "I hope you're gonna have something good to say, pete," "Or else otherwise, he's gonna-- what, what, he's gonna hate me?" "No, he is gonna be ashamed of you, like I am right now." "(cooperwhy are we here?" "I mean, all we ever wanted since Lucas was born" "Was for violet to be a part of his life." "How many times did she walk out of a room that he was in?" "How many times did she walk around him or by him" "Or pretend that Lucas didn't exist?" "And every time, you and I, we'd run into a corner" "And have a hushed conversation," "Hoping and praying that she would just lk at him." "Exactly." "That's" "Okay, but she did." "She looked at him." "You know, violet did what we all asked of her," "And instead of supporting her or breathing a sigh of relief," "Because, yeah, it's about time..." "We're in court, you know," "Telling her, "no, violet, you can't be a mother to your son."" "It's a little hypocritical, don't you think?" "Cooper, she's not ready." "Deep down, I think you know that." "(broome) do you believe" "That violet turner is a fit mother?" "Dr. Freedman?" "(judge) answer the question, Dr. Freedman" "(clears throat) no, I violet..." "Violet, I should've..." "I should've told you how I was feeling." "I didn't because I wanted to be there for you." "I was going to be there for you, and I got up there" "And I realized that this is about Lucas." "But I shoulda talked to you first." "I'm sorry." "(sniffling)" "All right, I'm gonna give you five minutes." "You've got five minutes" "To sulk about what everybody said about you in there." "You got five minutes to cry and scream" "And to call them every single bad name in the book." "Nai" "Then when those five minutes are up," "You're gonna walk back into that courtroom" "And you're gonna fight for your son." "I can't." "I can't." "I'm sorry, but the clock's ticking." "Damn it, naomi." "You know, maybe he's better off without me, okay?" "Maybe I am a terrible mother." "Well, that does not mean that you quit." "Yes, there will be times when you let your child down." "There will be times when you do the wrong thing." "There will be times when you are a horrible mother." "But that does not mean that you quit." "It means that you fight harder." "I mean, that's-- that's what I shoulda done." "So go back in there and fight." "Fight for the both of us." "(ellen) stick with me, violet." "Do you know how much I begged her not to do it?" "Do what?" "To cut him out of me." "I begged and I begged and I begged." "And when--when I knew she was gonna do it," "I-I told my baby..." "I told Lucas" "That mommy was very..." "Sorry" "For letting this happen." "And, um..." "And then I..." "And then I let her." "Let her what?" "I told katie how to cut him out of me" "Where to cut, how deep the incision should be," "How to see through the blood." "I helped her." "I helped her take my baby away from me." "Violet..." "Listen to me." "Â¶" "What could've happened to Lucas" "Had katie made the incision incorrectly?" "She--she could've cut him." "And what could've happened to Lucas if she cut too deep?" "(voice breaking) she could've cut him." "That's right." "And what could've happened to Lucas" "Had you not helped katie see through the blood?" "E could've cut him." "Yes." "You helped katie to cut Lucas out" "Because you were trying to protect him." "You brought Lucas into this world safe and unharmed." "You did that..." "Even as you almost bled to death." "Do you understand what that means?" "I chose Lucas..." "Yes." "Over me." "I chose Lucas." "Yes." "And you chose him again when you gave him to pete." "Do you hear me?" "(cries) you saved your little boy." "(sobs) I saved him?" "Yes." "(crying)" "(man) Â¶ I will reside Â¶" "Â¶ 'cause I'm gonna make it Â¶" "Â¶ with every smile..." "Â¶" "Please answer the question, Dr. Turner." "How many abortions have you had?" "Two." "And you considered aborting luc." "I-I hadn't planned on becoming a mother," "So, yes, I considered it, but then I changed-- so did you have any doubts" "About being a mother before the attack?" "Every woman has dots about becoming a mother." "Answer the question." "Yes, I had normal amount of uncertainty" "About becoming a mother." "Why didn't you do a paternity test?" "Until I understood what motherhood meant to me," "I couldn't consider the feelings of a partner," "So not knowing seemed to be the best option." "And aftehe was born?" "Let's get this straight." "Lucas was noborn." "He was ripped from my body." "And afterwards, I was fighting for my life and my sanity," "So I couldn't quite focus on who the father was." "We all understand the amount of stress that you were under," "But in that situation, in any situation," "Don't you think putting your own needs first" "Is the antithesis of being a good mother?" "Â¶ ..." "Gonna make it Â¶" "I've spent a lot of time thinking like that, ms." "Broome," "A lot of time thinking" "That I was poison for my child." "Â¶ I'm gonna make it, yes Â¶" "(voice breaking) but now I know that that is not true." "I have gone to therapy." "I have done the work." "And I know with every fiber of my being" "That I am ready to be Lucas' mother." "(normal voice) and when I wasn't ready," "I gave him to the one person I knew" "That would put Lucas' life before his own." "(sighs) and that was pete." "And my friends stepped in and helped." "And they are protective of Lucas." "And..." "As hard as it is to hear their concern for me," "I'm glad that they're protective." "(exhales deeply)" "But I'm back." "And I am not gonna apologize" "Or be made to feel bad" "For doing what was best for my child and for me." "I am here today..." "Becausi'm healed." "And I want to share custody of my son." "I am ready to share in the burden of parenting," "And I deserve th chance," "Because I did the work, because I got better... (voice breaking) and because I am Lucas' mother." "Â¶" "I am Lucas' mother." "And no one else can say that." "Â¶" "(shower running)" "(water runs in sink)" "(water turns off)" "(toothbrush clatters)" "(bome) last question, Dr. Wilder." "Given everything that's been said," "Given your personal experience," "Would you say that violet turner is a fit mother?" "Dr. Wilder." "May I please..." "I'd like to say something." "Of course." "He's just like you, you know that?" "He's stubborn already..." "And sensitive." "He observes people," "Laughs all the time, for no reason whatsoever." "He's just like you." "And I want him to know you, violet." "I do." "It's just, he doesn't know pain yet." "And I know it's coming one day." "It's inevitable-- he'll get his heart broken." "But I want to hold that off as long as I possibly can." "And I think that if you're ready to be part of Lucas' life..." "I know what you're like when you love someone." "I know what that feels like." "(voice breaks) and it's the best feeling in the world." "(normal voice) a-and I want Lucas to know that love," "Because you're his mother." "And I think that if you can love him..." "And I think you will be able to soon..." "I think we have a chance to raise the happiest," "Most loved little boy in the world." "But please, violet..." "Be ready." "That's all I ask." "Dr. Turner, you suffered a great tragedy," "And I sympathize with everything you've beethrough." "I commend you for going to therapy" "And getting yourself ready" "To have a relationship with your child." "It's a testament to your strength." "Over the couof this trial," "Many people who know you best and care for you most" "Expressed that they don't believe you're ready" "To be a mother right now." "And as much as I appreciate how far you've come" "And the intensity of your desire to be with Lucas," "I cannot simply substitute my judgment for theirs." "Therefore..." "I grant full custody to Dr. Wilder," "With supervised visitation to Dr. Turner." "Dr. Turner is free to file a petition" "To revisit this arrangement in the future." "(bangs gavel)" "(woman) Â¶ and one is lost Â¶" "Hey." "Hey." "How's william?" "He's really sick." "I'm sorry." "Â¶" "All right." "Well, I should get going." "It's good to see you." "Maya's eight months pregnant," "And I've never even felt the baby kick." "I haven't helped with the nursery." "I haven't bought one stitch of baby clothing." "Â¶" "Nothing." "Â¶" "Well..." "She needs more baby clothes." "All I got was this..." "Tiny little baseball cap." "(chuckles)" "Thing is in the nursery except a bassinette." "So you could go crazy in there." "And the baby kicks on cue when there's music playing," "So..." "If you wanted to spend time" "Singing to maya's belly..." "You could do that." "Â¶ ..." "Is ruthless Â¶" "It's too late?" "You're her mother." "It's never too late." "Â¶ ..." "From the forest Â¶" "This is something, isn't it?" "Yeah." "It's something." "Â¶" "Â¶ and when he asks me to rest with him Â¶" "That was you..." "Pete's testimony." "Â¶" "It's okay." "It's okay." "You don't have to..." "It's just..." "Well, we've--we've been through a war this week," "And, uh, and I lost." "So I'm trying to appreciate the small things." "So if you helped pete," "And if he hates me a little bit less because of you," "Then..." "Then that's something I can appreciate." "I'm sorry." "God, I didn't expect-- I-I thought the judge" "No, don't." "It's not the end of the world." "It's a step." "It's a small step, but it's a step." "Â¶ ruthless Â¶" "I'm going to see Lucas, and I'm going to be happy." "Â¶" "Are you?" "I don't know." "Â¶ it's easier Â¶" "Â¶ when I'm fast asleep Â¶" "Â¶ but I don't want you to come to me anymore Â¶" "Pete doesn't hate you." "Â¶" "Â¶ so I don't want you to come to me anymore Â¶" "Â¶ oh, oh, oh, oh Â¶" "Â¶ and out of ashes comes morning Â¶" "Â¶ and the ritual of bathing Â¶" "Â¶ in the pools..." "Â¶" "Violet's not here." "Look... (clears throat) I don't know where I'm headed" "Do I look like a gps to you?" "Could you just shut up and let me finish," "Let me talk?" "Figuratively speaking, I don't know where I'm headed." "I do know I haven't been myself lately," "And even though I'm trying to get back there," "I don't know how long that's gonna take." "Where was I going with that?" "I..." "I had this memorized." "You were saying you don't know squat." "Right." "Okay..." "What I do know..." "What I realized from this whole ordeal," "Is what's important..." "Like, um..." "The people that you love." "Â¶" "And you are important to me, charlotte." "Â¶ and you have my bones and my skin Â¶" "Â¶ haunting my..." "Â¶" "You're important to me, too." "Â¶ love is ruthless Â¶" "Have dinner with me?" "Â¶ oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Â¶" "Â¶ and the tall trees all fell down Â¶" "(mouths words)" "Â¶ and they scattered seeds on the ground Â¶" "Â¶ and one is lost and one is found Â¶" "(babbles)" "Â¶ ..." "Look around Â¶" "Â¶ and you're the one who showed to me the sky Â¶" "Â¶ it's so much more than you and I Â¶" "Â¶ and, darling, I wish I had the time Â¶" "Â¶ the river is whispering good-bye Â¶" "(speaking inaudibly)" "Â¶ bye Â¶" "Â¶ bye Â¶"