"The fear in her eyes and the knife in the chest" "That's my last memory of my mother" "That's why I had to go to prison for four years" "Even though she survived it" "After that it went good for a while" "Until I met that 70 year old" ""Oh my god" were her last words" "Then she was dead" "I didn't know her and I didn't steal anything" "That damned idea was suddenly there" "I just had to" "I couldn't explain it" "So I went to prison for 10 years" "Then the psychologists got interested in my inner life" "When they asked me about my dreams, I told them about flowers" "Flowers" "Always just flowers" "Apart from that, I could phantasize in my mind whatever I wanted" "It helped me control this urge to..." "Just let it all out" "Prison exists so one can better oneself" "But that urge to torture a human, that's one thing I never could get rid of" "If you sum everything up" "Then I've been behind bars more than half of my life" "Only, I never commited a crime out of pure joy" "There was always a little something, that was added to it." "I knew:" "It will happen again" "It has to" "But this time they won't get me" "Nobody came to pick me up" "No family Nothing" "I would've been to excited anyway" "I couldn't sleep the whole last night" "Finally free" "I already had a concrete plan" "The details were all fixed" "Now it was only neccesary to find somebody" "But I didn't know where I was" "I've lived in this town for 10 years" "Only, behind bars you can't get to know a city" "My first question was: "Where to?"" "I thought." "Where can you meet somebody?" "So I went to the first Café that was open" "There were really two sitting there" "They were still pretty young" "But that would've worked" "I felt a bit awkward, dressed as I was" "But after 10 years of prison, you can't be dressed modern" "They stared at me" "I was on it immediately" "They literally provoked me" "My fantasy immediately began to go wild" "I wondered how I could approach them" "That excited me enormously" "I immediately imagined the greatest things" "But it would've caused too much attention in the Café" "Everybody could've heard us" "That wasn't a good opportunity" "It was absolutely neccesary to find a quiet place and everything would've gone by itself" "Then a coincidence helped me" "Where to?" "Straigt ahead, please" "The opportunity in the Texi was just great" "It shouldn't be a robbery, I wasn't interested in money" "That woman reminded me of my first girlfriend, Anna-Marie" "A real whore" "I was 14 at the time, and she was significantly older than me" "She nearly could've been my mother" "We sat on a bench in the park" "I had to remove a shoe" " She took the shoe away from me..." " What are you doing?" "...and she only would return it to me" " ...if I gave her a kiss" " What are you doing there?" "Anna-Marie then took me home with her" "She seduced me" "That's when I was able to get active for the first time" "First I tied her up, then sealed her mouth shut..." "Then I hit her" "With a belt and later with a real whip" "She couldn't get enough" "I really enjoyed it" "I became that Anna-Marie's slave, and it really excited me" "What are you doing there?" "Nobody had followed me" "Where to and how long I'd run, I don't know" "I didn't know that area" "I'd never been there" "The house seemed desolate to me" "I wasn't sure if somebody would live in there" "I noticed nobody and didn't hear anything" "No human soul around" "I thought, that's a paradise for me" "The house was well protected by the park and the trees" "I didn't have to be afraid of neighbours here" "The locating was perfect" "No danger of being spotted here" "I could hardly breathe" "I was incredibly excited" "The opportunity to meet someone in here... nearly made me go mad" "I thought I couldn't take it much longer" "I was sure someone lived in here" "My victims" "I was afraid" "Da-dy?" "Not of the law" "I was in a state of mind that excluded every kind of logic" "I was afraid of myself" "Already earlier in my life, I had been in great fear" "For example, as a child it was impossible for me to be alone in a room" "My grandmother once locked me alone in the dark room for a whole night" "I thought she was trying to kill me" "That I'd die of fear" "The only thing that helped me were those sounds" "What luck I had" "What luck I had" "This house was perfect for me" "My plan would work" "Mommy" "Daddy is here" "Don't be stupid, he's long been dead" "As a child, I always had to fear for my life" "First my mother threw out my father" "Then she lived with another man" "My stepfather" "And she tried to kill me" "She winded me in wet diapers and put me in front of the open window" "I should get cold at the windows and freeze to death" "Sylvia!" "Sylvia" "Sylvia" "I was never safe of my mother" "She hated boys" "For my mother, I was only an attempt to get a girl" "She didn't want a boy like me" "She developed a real infatuation for my sister" "I didn't exist for her" "My sister could do with me whatever she wanted" "My mother always just laughed" "But one time, I caught my sister alone" "I really gave it to her then" "I wanted to hit her until she was dead" "In her eyes I saw that she was afraid of me" "That excited me enormously" "Because my mother didn't want me, I grew up at my grandmother's" "But she always just said that she had to be ashamed of me" "That I was a shame for the whole family" "Because I was a illegitimate child" "She was incredibly religious ...and to purge the guilt, she sent me to a convent" "I didn't want to" "But I had to become a priest" "Whe students lived in that convent ...and the nuns and priests had a farm there" "There were all kinds of animals there" "One afternoon, I secretly snuck into the barn ...and used a knife until the blood fleow" "It was a pig" "It was afraid of me and squeaked so loudly that the nuns came and caught me" "After this incident I had to leave the convent" "For my grandmother, a world collapsed" "She was so religious..." "No I was no longer allowed to become a priest" "After the incident ant the convent, my mother said that my family had to be afraid of me" "For her, I now was a monster" "She punished me by not letting me back to my grandmother" "That was because my stepfather decided to take over my ubringing" "But he hated me" "He was always good to my sister" "He only couldn't stand me" "She was never treated badly" "One time, he hit me so badly, that I had to crawl on the floor" "My mother and my sister just stood there and laughed at me" "I wanted to take revenge on my stepfather" "I wanted to kill him, out of rage" "Da-dy" "But I was too weak" "So I had to run away from home" "I slept in the park" "There I observed a swan" "First I strangled it" "Then I cut off its head" "It was expelled by his group and didn't go back into the water" "It lived all by itself in a corner of the park" "It liked humans very much" "But it was afraid of me" "I imagined, that I was taking my revenge then" "Everything went wrong" "Everything happened to fast" "I had it imagined totally differently" "Much much more dramatic" "At least now I wanted to stick to my plan" "First the mother should visit her dead son" "She should observe very carefully ...how he no longer could move" "That would teach her some respect" "But...she wasn't moving anymore herself" "I thought she was playing a trick on me" "Like a fox that pretends to be dead" "I really thought she was simulating" "Then I noticed that there was really something wrong with her" "Nobody can act that well" "That's impossible" "But she shouldn't be unconscious" "She had to experience every phase very thoroughly" "I had lost control" "A catastrophe!" "That couldn't happen to me" "What are you doing?" "Mother is ill" "She needs her medicine" "In the kitchen" " She could help me" " Please" "The old one had to stay concscious no matter what" "I wanted to strangle her after all" "And the daughter should watch how her mother slowly died" "She should see what it meant to die" "The young one tried to get me" "Either she liked me that much or she was just trying to rescue herself" "But that didn't matter, she just didn't know it yet" "I had planned something very special for her" "She would take the most, that was obvious" "The thing with her is going to be very special" "In the kitchen I had already noticed various tools" "With her, I'll do it in the most precise manner" "Exactly that, what I had always imagined" "But first I had to get up the old one" "She had to gain consciousness again" "After all, she was supposed to whimmer and be afraid of me" "Then the daughter would have to watch how she would die" "She can't give up" "Just like that" "I finished her" "Now only the girl was left to me" "You!" "You" "You" "You" "You..." "You" "I didn't want to leave the corpses in the house like that" "I decided to take the family with me" "The thought that I could have the corpses with me all the time ...excited me tremendously" "I no case would I leave without them" "I had my plans with the corpses" "I was determined that this all was only the beginning" "I wanted to live out my fantasies" "At that moment, I didn't care where that would lead" "I didn't think about it at all" "I wanted to get new victims as soon as possible" "I was crazy about it" "I made a new plan" "I wanted to show the corpses to the new victims" "I was convinced that I could really scare them with that" "I had the idea, that I lock the new victims together with the corpses" "That would scare them enormously" "Some would surely die of fear" "They couldn't stand being tortured that way" "And then I would finish them off" "After the act I felt very well" "My head felt lighter" "Also my whole body felt lighter" "I thought that everything I did was easier now" "As if I was floating" "I was in a bright, yes even cheerful mood" "Of course I knew that this state of mind .that this relief wouldn't last long" "That this urge would return" "Hey!" "Hey!" "Hey, get out of there!" "Get out of there already!" "Hey!" "Come on!" "I can't pity the victims" "I wanted to continue to murder" "I already had a perfect plan" "The two women were sitting there again" "I was on it immediately" "My fantasy immediately began to go wild" "It was irresistible" "Just phantastic" "I thought" "How could I approach them?" "Then I decided:" "I'll take them all" "I'll take all four of them right now right here" "Show me your registration" "I don't have anything to do it with!" "The registration!" "I got that car from someone else, I don't know how that happened" " I don't care, show me your registration" " I..." "What now?" "Do you have a registration or don't you?" " It's not my fault, that's not my car..." "I don't care, show me your registration" "The moment was very enthralling" "It really excited me" " But I don't have anything to do with it!" " Open up the trunk!" "Now everybody's going to be scared to death" "Now everybody is afraid of me" "I'm famous" "It's a pity about those girls, though..." "That would've been a nice tango" "Excerpt from the psychiatric opinion" "The patient planned and commited the crime consciously to get physical satisfaction" "His personality is labile and perverse" "The worst mental disorder is a pronounced sadism" "A mental illnes wasn't diagnosed, though" "That by hurting somebody and by using violence on other people, he could get sexually excited is known to the patient since earliest childhood" "His relation to society is severy disturbed" "This is because already as a baby he was abandoned by the mother and would later never know a stable family" "The patient is 100% responsible... but one cannot speak of guilt in the common sense in this case" "The prospect of punishment didn't stop him from murdering" "Sentence on behalf of the public:" "Prison for life" "Subtitles created by Kane32 for karagarga.net"