"Abby:" "Previous on "the L.A. Complex":" "Look, if you guys have any constructive criticism," "I'd love to hear it." "You should quit." "There's this girl I'm kind of in love with right now," "But she wants to keep it casual." "The casual stuff, that's my bit." "Uh, no it's not!" "We came up with that bit together" "When we were in bed!" "I'm gonna burn your life down." "How come we're not good together?" "Raquel:" "Who says that?" "We do." "Look, I know I want youwith me." "I want to build a life, just us." "Hey, Kal." "What the hell are you doing?" "!" "Kal?" "!" "Faggot!" " Are you okay?" " Not really." " What's wrong?" " I'm not good enough." "♪ Do this thing, this type of thing ♪" "♪ put a little money in this type of thing ♪" "♪ I've got nothing to worry about ♪" "♪" "♪ Negative ♪" "♪ why always so negative?" "♪" "♪ if you have problems ♪" "♪ why don't you go solve them?" "♪" "♪ Trouble seems ♪" "♪ trouble seems to follow you ♪" "♪ lit's always 'round you ♪" "♪ like some thing you subscribe to ♪" "♪ be prepared ♪" "♪ There must be something in you ♪" "♪ turning boys to men ♪" "♪ and then back again ♪" "♪ Do this thing, this type of thing ♪" "♪ Put a little money in this type thing ♪" "♪ I've got nothing to worry about ♪" "♪ I've got nothing to worry about ♪" "Stohn:" "Have you lost your mind?" "!" "Rook:" "He was defending' himself!" "Stohn:" "Defending himself?" "You felt your life was being threatened," "Is that it?" "The little queer tried to kiss him!" "What'd he expect was gonna happen?" "Pretty sure he didn't expect that!" "Well, you provoke a wild dog, you gonna get bit!" "Stohn:" "Mr. King's not a pit bull!" "He's a public figure with a criminal record" "Who is currently out on parole in the state of california!" "It's not like the kid is dead!" "If this kid talks to the cops," "He's going back to jail." "That's all there is to it!" "So we find him first," "And we make sure he knows what happens to people" "When they talk." "Absolutely not!" "Me and kal have been friends our whole lives," "And been through a hell of a lot worse," "So I think I know how to make our little problem go away." "What are you going to do to this kid" "That you haven't already done?" "!" "Don't answer that!" "We need to get him to sign a confidentiality agreement" "And pay him off." "That's how we deal with this!" "I'll find him." "I strongly recommend you let me handle this." "Kal, trust me, I got this." "I'm telling you." "I'm telling you!" "I'm gonna take care of it." "♪ nothing to worry about ♪" "Beth, look!" "That's not for us." "But I'm hungry though!" "No." "Get over it." "Help yourself." "There's like 30 different muffins here." "Look, that's banana bacon." "It's ridiculous." "You need to try it." "Yeah, what do they charge?" "Five bucks for those muffins?" "No thanks." "Yeah, no..." "Oh, you're serious!" "No, no, this is- this is free." "No one's keeping track, really." "Help yourself." "Simon, I" "You have my permission." "Oh, this is so good!" "Watch your fingers." "Thanks." "No problem." "Have a good one." "Can you eat some fruit?" "So that's it?" "We're gonna miss you around here." "I'm gonna miss you guys too." "Who knows, I might be back." "Eddie:" "I hope not!" "For her sake." "For your sake, I mean!" "I'm sorry;" "that came out wrong." "You know what I mean." "I'm proud of you though." "You did it," "And you did it on your own terms." "Yeah." "Aw, geez." "You okay?" "I'm going to be." "You take care of yourself, okay?" "are you sure you're gonna be okay without me?" "No." "Bye, Nick." "Bye." "And, hey, don't do anything I wouldn't do." "Hello?" "Hey, Nick, I gotta talk to you." "Is this Nick Wagner?" " Yeah." "" " This is Scott Cray." "I saw your set last night for the Montreal festival" "And budd gave me your number." "Okay." "Nick, it's important." "I just..." "Listen, we're putting together a writing room" "For a new late-night talk show" "And I was wondering, do you have a packet?" "Uh, like a..." "Like a writer's packet?" "It's for a writers room, so that's what I'd bring," "But I don't want to clip your wings." "I have a writer's packet." "Of course I do." "Nick, it's important." "Great!" "I've left a drive-on for you at the Jefferson lot." "Come on by in a couple hours." "Seriously?" "!" "No, no, Nick, this whole call is a lie." "Yeah, I like to play elaborate practical jokes on people I've never met before." "You know, that thing that no one does." "Couple of hours, I'll be there." "All right, already regretting it." "Okay." " Nick." " Yes, what?" "!" "You gotta pay more rent." "What?" "Why?" "You got two people living in your room." "No I don't." "Oh, you don't?" "no." "Hey, what's up?" "You know the rules, Nick;" "more occupants, more rent." "I want $400 more per month." "Yeah, but we're not living together." "I'm just crashing here just for a little while." "Duh-duh-duh-duh-duh!" "Your commitment issues are not my concern, okay?" "You're- bu-bu-bu-bu-bu!" "You both live here, you pay more rent, get over it." "I can't afford another $400 a month." "Eddie, I just booked a movie part, so I'm about to be hundreds of dollars richer." "Could you at least give us till the end of the week?" "You got a week to make the rent or else one of you has to leave." "Are we living together?" "Guess so?" "it's not too soon?" "I actually need to have this conversation later." "Right now I have to figure out what a writer's packet is." "I need a writer's packet and I don't know what it is." "A writer's packet." "Raquel:" "Thanks for coming over." "Just..." "Let me get this out, okay?" "I'm pregnant, and it's yours," "and I don't know what to do about it." "Hi." "That's weird." "Can I come in?" "Sure." " Everything all right?" " My house burnt down." "What?" "!" "What happened?" "!" " Bad wiring." " Are you okay?" "Yeah, I never really liked that place anyway." "No, no." "Are you okay?" "Yeah, I'm fine." "I just was wondering if I could crash here for a little bit?" "Here?" "Yeah, I don't really like the idea of a hotel." "This is a hotel." "You're right." "It's probably a terrible idea." "Sorry." "Thanks for the drink." "Hey, hey, hey, hey!" "It's not that I don't want you to, okay?" "You just..." "Caught me off guard." "You and me, huh?" "Yeah." "Be just like a sleepover... with fewer clothes." "Maybe just for a little while." "Oh, come on, I'm injured." "oh my god." "Hello?" "So, hi." "Hi, Ron." "I got you an audition today for that "saying grace" show." "It shoots this week, could be a good gig." "I can't this week, ron." "I'm doing that movie, remember?" "Ron:" "Oh, did I..." "I didn't call you about that?" "About what?" "Oh, Jacob Schwartzman's schedule's been pushed," "So the movie's been put on hold." "For how long?" "Uh, indefinitely." "Abby:" "No!" "Do I still get paid?" "!" "Ron:" "Oh, I don't imagine so." "Abby:" "Ron, I really need the money." "I'm kind of in a tight spot right now." "Ron:" "And that's why I got you the audition." "I'll email the sides to your email address." "damn it." "Is everything okay?" "Uh, yeah, no, everything's fine." "Are you sure?" "'cause it sounded like everything was not okay." "No, I'm just late for an audition." "I'm still getting paid on Friday, right?" "Absolutely!" " Where is he?" " Tariq?" "I don't know." "Did he not come into work?" "Is everything all right?" "It's all good." "I can't believe you came to the lux." "It's so public." "An escape in every bite!" "And eat it!" "Eat the yogurt, kid!" "That's a cut." "Okay, that's a cut." "Okay, reset." "Oh, that main kid is really crashing and burning, huh?" "I get paid just to run around and play?" "I get to sit over there and get told what to do" "Beth, we're making money!" "You're right." "You gotta eat it." "That's the job, all right?" "You say the line, you take a bite." "But I can't eat dairy;" "I'm allergic." "You're- it's an intolerance, not an allergy." "He can eat it." "He'll be fine." "Honey, we talked about this." "But it makes me really sick!" "Yeah, maybe this is something you could have mentioned" "Before we hired him." "Uh..." "Hey, craft table kid, you like eating, right?" "Can you say" ""an escape in every bite!"" "Exactly!" "Okay." "You..." "Uh, sorry, what are you doing?" "He can do it!" "Take the rest of the day off, kid." "Good, good." "Okay, so when I say action, you're going to" "Say the line, take a bite," "And smile into the camera." "Where have you been all day?" "I was over there." "No, I know, I just" "Okay, let's just go real quick, people!" "Beth:" "Sorry, sorry." "What is going on right now?" "Your brother's saving our ass and is about to make a lot more money, okay?" "How much more?" "I dunno, double." "Can we just talk about" "No." "No deal." "Beth, shut up!" "You just said simon's about to save your ass." "Seems to me that's worth at least..." "Triple, don't you think?" "Are you his sister or his agent?" "I'm whatever he needs me to be." "Fine." "Triple." "Can I shoot my commercial now, please?" "Yeah." "Let's go!" "Simon, don't screw this up for us, okay?" "Great pep talk." "1st ad:" "Background!" "Camera!" "Action!" ""an escape in every bite!"" "Cut!" "Perfect!" "I wanna do one more!" "Cheers, roomie." "No." "No?" "No." "It's 10 a.M." "I just don't feel like drinking." "Let's do something else." "Okay." "No." "Something not here." "Like what?" "I dunno." "You're about to be a big TV star." "Maybe we should go do something" "Before people start swarming you" "When you walk down the street." "But what about all the people swarming you?" "I'll wear sunglasses." "Where do you want to go?" "I dunno." "What do you do when you're not working," "Or drinking, or having meaningless sex?" "Um..." "I dunno." "What do you do?" "Well, this is sad." "We could do runyon." "Runyon, great." "Yeah, okay." "We can walk and talk about things." "Talk about what?" "Raquel:" "I don't know." "Justgrabyourkeys." "♪" "Do you ever think about that?" "What?" "Shopping at L.L. Bean?" "No." "Having a family." "yeah." "Oh, god, this is stupid." "What are we doing up here?" "I don't know." "You're the one who said you wanted to do "something else."" "I kinda like it up here." "Look at this view!" "All I see is smog." "Come on, look at the trees." "That bush - whatever that is." "I hate nature." "This is not na" "I don't think you can call runyon canyon nature." "There's a coffee bean like a 100 meters away." "When we were kids, my dad used to make us go camping in algonquin." "Four days of blackfly bites and endless hikes," "Burnt hot dogs, warm soda pop." "I wanted to shoot myself." "That doesn't sound so bad." "You never talk about your family." "Not really anything to talk about." "It's pretty much just me and my dad." "Did he ever take you camping?" "Connor:" "Once." "What happened?" "He drove a tent spike through my hand." "By accident?" "Well, that depends on who you ask." "This is the guy who raised you?" "He taught me everything I know." "Look, are we done here?" "Yeah." "I guess." "I mean, you're not really feeling this, right?" "Can we just back to the lux, have a drink?" "No, no, you know what?" "We're not giving up that easy." "Come on." "Come on." "You're not gonna make me go camping, are you?" "♪ hey, hey ♪" "♪ you can't take back yesterday ♪" "♪ you gotta just let it go ♪" "♪ hey-ey-ey ♪" ""you're my twin brother, Charlie." "I can tell when you're lying."" "Brandon:" ""so what?" "Loaded a couple movies off the internet." "So what?"" ""It's stealing, Charlie."" ""Well, it's not hurting anyone""" ""It's hurting you, your soul." "Theft is a sin." "There's no way around it."" "You're right." "What did I do?" "!" "it's okay." "Casting assistant:" "Abby Vargas, you're up." "Abby:" "Hi." "Hello." "Any questions before we start?" "Nope." "I wasn't expecting everyone to be here." "Well, our pick-up was late this year, so we went straight to testing." "Oh my." "Did your agent explain this character to you?" "She's a missionary." "She's married to god." "I know." "okay." "Well, let's just try one." "Hi." "Hi." "And action!" ""Africa?" "!"" ""if you and Grace have taught me anything," "It's that you can do anything you put your mind to."" "Brandon:" ""I'm just worried about you." "It's not gonna be easy over there."" ""but those who hope in the Lord"" "will regain their strength." "They'll soar on wings of eagles and..." "Uh, and soar on the wings of eagles... and keep it happening no matter what." "Filipinos 4:13""" "Philippians." "Pardon?" "It's Philippians, not Filipinos." "sorry." "Thank you, abby, that'll be enough." "I kinda messed up." "Should we run it again?" "I just don't think you fit the tone of our show, but thanks for coming in." "I really, really need this." "Could we please just try it one more time?" "You're dressed like a prostitute." "Okay." "You know, there are a lot of shows on tv, there aren't a lot of shows about something." "You guys are actually making a positive change in this world." "I wanted to be a part of that." "A part of god's work." "Brandon:" "Amen." "Abby:" "Thanks for the opportunity." "I'm really sorry I let you down, but let he who is without sin cast the first stone." "God bless you." "♪" "Hi." "Uh, Nick Wagner." "I have a meeting with Scott Cray." "Sabrina:" "Thank god." "I was worried there was gonna be some steep competition for this job." "Hello, Sabrina." "Receptionist:" "Great!" "You can just have a seat and we'll call you in when we're ready." "What are you doing here?" "Scott saw my set last night" "My set." "You did my set last night." "He saw me perform and thought I might want to" " And you said "yes"?" " Of course." "I'm not gonna" "You realize you can't do this job, right?" "You're not a complete idiot." "Why wouldn't I be able- it's tv." "Do you know how much material you have to generate every day?" "I think I have a pretty good" "You've been working on the same five minutes of stand-up for months - months!" "" "And even then you had to steal a bit from me just to make it work." "I apologized!" "I didn't realize" "Do you think you can be funny every day?" "Every day, Nick?" "That's adorable." "I know what you're doing." "You're trying to get in my head before I" "Yeah, and it's working;" "that should worry you." "Comedy writing is a blood sport, Nick." "You're too sensitive." "You don't perform well under pressure." "They're gonna eat you alive." "You won't even make it past the interview." "Receptionist:" "Nick Wagner?" "You're up." "Hey, all kidding aside, break a leg." "Knock 'em dead, sweetheart!" "we're in love." "Eddie:" "No, rosa, no." "I cannot cover for you today." "I'm busy." "I have a prior engagement." "Okay, rosa," "Can you callate your boca, please?" "Okay, if all the rooms aren't cleaned today, management's gonna kill me." "Don't make me play bad cop with you, Rosa." "Rosa!" "Damn it!" "Rosa bailed again?" "One day a week she has to come in, and that's it." "I don't know what to do." "Why are you wearing a suit?" "I signed up for some acting classes." "I know it's stupid." "It's not stupid." "I just wanted to get back into it, you know." "Not to be famous or anything." "If that happens, that's great, but..." "Now I gotta miss class and clean all the rooms, because I hired the laziest cleaning lady in L.A." "It's not a racial thing." "How much do you pay Rosa?" "Twenty-five bucks an hour." " I'll do it." " Really?" "Yeah, I just had the worst audition" "So I really need the money." "You're still gonna make rent this week, right?" "Yeah, yeah," "Oh, I just mean like extra money for whatever." "Okay, great." "'cause, you know, you miss the first class then you can never catch up and there'll be all these little cliques and I'll be on the outside." "So where do I start?" "Right this way." "Lady's choice." "Twenty-five dollars an hour." "Twenty-five dollars an hour." "♪" "This is where you wanted to come?" "Yeah, I love this place." "Why is that so hard to believe?" "I don't know." "It's just all this... old-timey hollywood stuff." "Like Grauman's, the walk of fame," "It just seems all a bit sentimental for you." "Hey, I'm capable of sentiment occasionally." "Don't!" "We said we'd never walk away angry." "Hi!" "Would you be interested in a free personality quiz?" "Would we ever." "Are you two new to los angeles?" "We are!" "We're on vacation." "It's our honeymoon, actually." "Well, congratulations!" "Are you familiar with dianetics at all?" "No, but I would like to be." "Is that anything like diuretics?" "I don't think so." "It's a system designed to relieve psychosomatic disorders by cleansing the mind of any harmful mental images." "Oh, so it's like diuretics for your brain." "What kind of mental images?" "You know, anything that's troubling you." "Things from your past, the way you see yourself." "Basically anything that's holding you back." "How does it work?" "Oh, we actually have a film that will explain the entire thing, so if you'd like to step aside" "And give us your personal information" "Raquel:" "Uh, you know what?" "Wecan't, 'cause we're running late" "For the universal studios tour." "Well, how long is the film?" "How long is the film?" "!" "Thank you very much, but we already have one of those." "Thanks." "What is wrong with you?" "What?" "I just wanted to hear what she had to say." "It sounded interesting." "Hey!" "Hey, look." "Hey, hey." "Let's get you back to the lux before someone invites you to a timeshare seminar." "Yes!" "Can we go and get drunk, please?" "How about this?" "How about we order some mr." "Chow, watch a movie, curl up, just you and me." "That sounds great." "Think I can get that book online?" "No." "Promise me you won't." "Oh." "Yo, you find him?" "Hey, you sure you know what you're doin'?" "D's here." "Says he wants to talk to you alone." "I don't know what rock your boy's hiding under, but you let him know" "The studio has security cameras." "They record everything day and night, all onto one little hard drive." "You watch what's on there?" "Look, I don't know what you think you saw" "I know what I saw." "What do you want?" "You to make this right with Tariq." "Can't find him." "I know where he is." "How is he?" "I had a doctor take a look at him, one who doesn't ask a lot of questions;" "that way, we can keep this real quiet." "But Tariq's got a couple requests." "Requests?" "It's starting to sound a lot like blackmail." "Look, I'm your producer, so I can make this sound" "Any way you want it to sound, but personally, I think the best way to handle this situation is to keep the volume way down." "Now, you owe him and you know why." "So you make this right with Tariq, or I'll hand over that hard drive to the press." "Your choice." "Hey, super boy, thanks for saving the day." "You're welcome." "I think they laid out some candy, why don't you go power up?" "Simon, no!" "You're gonna make yourself sick!" "Yeah." "Great." "Thanks for that." "Director:" "Aw, he deserves it." "He has his moments." "Why isn't he in L.A.?" "You know, a kid that good, not a complete nightmare, he'd work." "No, this was just a one-time deal." "The little treasure answered the ad on Craigslist" "Without asking, so..." "How about you?" "You ever thought of giving it a go?" "No." "Come on." "I actually think the whole thing is kinda lame." "ah..." "Not to- no, that's fair enough." "That's fair enough." "I do think he's great." "If you ever do find yourself in L.A.," "Drop me a line." "Thanks." "Cool." "All right." "This is the greatest day of my life!" "Here, I got a candy for you." "Thank you." "Okay, let's go." "I, uh, some of that stuff is pretty old." "I haven't been very diligent keeping the packet fresh." "Oh, sorry I'm late." "Hey." "No, no, no!" "What?" "What's he doing here?" "What are you doing here?" "What am I...?" "It's my show." "The Paul F. Tompkins show." "You don't even know what job you're interviewing for?" "All he said was a talk show." "He didn't say" "This is the guy you told me to bring in." "It most certainly is not!" "Yeah, Nick Wagner." "That is Nick Wagner." "It is?" "Yeah." "No, I meant the other guy, the funny guy." "This is the canadian plastic bags kid." "I did that bit one time." "I liked him." "You know, he had some decent material." "How's the packet?" "It's okay." "It's "okay"?" "!" "Did I hear you right?" ""it's okay."" "Oh, please, sir, my apologies," "Welcome aboard." "It is rare to see someone provoke such enthusiasm from our head writer!" "Look, I know you don't like me, but I took your advice, all right?" "I threw out the bag joke and I wrote all new stuff" "I tell you what, Nick, I tell you what..." "Make me laugh." "What?" "Yeah, make me laugh." "It's a comedy show, you claim to be a funny person," "It's not unreasonable for me to request that you provoke a sense of mirth in me." "Make me laugh and you're hired." "What, like do a bit or something?" "Okay, uh..." "Sabrina, I'm good in bed, right?" "Sure, if you can get over the crying, the erectile dysfunction, and the it's-so-childish it's-creepy pillow talk, he's still an impossibly lousy lay." "Then there's the endless needy texts:" ""What are you doing?" ""Where are you?"" "And that's the healthiest relationship I've ever had." "Right." "Thank you for your time." "See, I didn't realize I was his first." "It's like an episode of "murder she wrote."" "Like, in hindsight, there were so many signs." "♪ I see the devil in the faces that I meet ♪" "♪ I'll find a new way ♪" "That took forever." "Well, do you want it done right?" "Rosa does it way quicker." "Wow, that's a pretty outfit." "Oh, I'm just helping Eddie out." "I think you pull it off." "I should..." "I'm gonna go." "Connor, my man, those critical unit promos are the bomb!" "What's that song they use?" "I don't know." "It looks great, man." "And you're gonna be a tv star!" "Hey, we should have a party, celebrate!" "Yes, absolutely." "No, no, no, hey, we have plans." "Here." "Take that." "Just make sure there's enough booze for everybody." "Um, uh, what should we buy?" "Just get one of everything." "I love this man, listen." "all right." "Bye, Raquel." "What?" "We're prepared to make you a substantial one-time payment" "In exchange for signing this confidentiality agreement." "It encompasses all of your dealings" "With Mr. King." "You're forbidden from disclosing this incident or any others you may have witnessed during your employment here." "For all intents and purposes, after you sign, your time with Mr. King never happened." "Do you understand?" "How much are we talking about?" "What do you want?" "I want a plane ticket home." "And?" "That's it." "Tariq... you can ask for anything you want." "You don't get opportunities like this twice." "That's what I want." "Hey, if he wants to leave, then let him go." "We done here?" "Tariq:" "No." "I wanna talk to you without all these people around." "That's not a good idea." "Hey, whatever, man." "If that's what it takes to make this little thing go away, then so be it." "Just give us a minute." "don't apologize." "he's right." "You can't admit any fault." "Ain't nothin to admit." "Just get the drive... and make sure he signs." "I'm sorry." "I don't want your apology." "Nothing you say means anything." "You told me you loved me." "I do love you." "Look at my face." "I'm gonna carry this with me for the rest of my life." "Tariq- any time I start to feel something for someone," "I will always feel this because of you." "Just tell me how to fix it." "Just tell me what I need to do." "Please!" "You know what I want?" "Tell me, I'll do it." "I want all of this to have never happened." "That was easy." "I never wanna see you again." "Thanks, Mike." "Are you sure you don't want me to wait for you?" "No, it's okay." "We're gonna pick up a few things for our parents" "And then we'll get a cab home." "Thanks for the lift." "Bye." "Did you see when Greg the grip let me play with the crane?" "He didn't let you play with the crane." "He was pretending." "He goes wherever the crane goes." "Wouldn't that be the best?" "Come on." "Let's go in and brush your teeth before the mall closes, or have they already fallen out of your head?" "Can we play Texas Hold'em tonight?" "What, I didn't take enough of your pennies last time?" "Brush your teeth and we'll see." "Yes!" "♪ oh, let's lie down for another night ♪" "♪ I'll hold you close under these skies ♪" "♪ your brother's in the basement ♪" "♪ doin' hot knives ♪" "♪ your brother's in the basement ♪" "♪ doin' hot knives ♪" "♪ we struggle to tear ourselves apart in the night ♪" "♪ we struggle to tear ourselves apart in the light ♪" "♪ but your father's on his way back home from... ♪" "Eddie's office." "Tariq:" "Abby?" "Tariq!" "Where have you been?" "Kaldrick was looking for you." "Is Eddie around?" "No, but I can leave a message for him." "Can you ask him to pack up my stuff and forward it to my parents' place in Montreal?" "What?" "Tariq, what's going on?" "I can't talk about it." "Okay, um, did something happen to your family?" "Yeah, something happened to my family." "Just tell Eddie for me, okay?" "Abby:" "Of course." "Are you moving back for good?" "Tariq:" "I don't know." "When is enough enough, Abby?" "Tariq, what happened?" "I gotta go." "Tariq" "Abby!" "So, how did it go?" "Great!" "The teacher said I was astonishing, so..." "That's great." "Um, I just finished up, so do you mind if I get paid now?" "Oh, yeah, of course, of course." "Awesome." "Let's see here..." "Fifty bucks." "There you go." "Fifty?" "You said twenty-five an hour." "Yeah, that's what we pay Rosa," "But she, uh, does everything in two hours, so..." "I worked for six hours, so that's a hundred and fifty." "A hundred and fifty dollars?" "What, are you nuts?" "I'm not gonna pay you three times as much for working three times as slow!" "Come on!" "Eddie, you lied to me!" "Look, Abby, I am in a fantastic mood." "People don't always get what they want." "It's fifty bucks." "You can take it or leave it." "♪ ..." "Tonight!" "♪" "Partiers:" "I'm gonna have a drink." "jump!" "Jump!" "Jump!" "Jump!" "Hey, no!" "Connor, no!" "Stop it!" "Jump!" "Jump!" "Jump!" " No!" "Shut up!" "Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no." "♪we're hanging out on muscle relaxants♪" "Woo!" "♪ trying hard not to see the worst ♪" "♪ that could happen now... ♪" "Okay, come on out." "Eddie!" "Yeah." "Hey, yeah..." "That was awesome." "But, uh, you know," "We're not really supposed to jump from" "There's a sign up there." "Sorry." "I'm sorry." "It's, it's not me, you know?" "It's just for insurance reasons." "I would be completely liable." "Won't happen again, all right?" "Let's hug it out." "No, please don't!" "I gotta keep the t-neck dry." "It's cool, just..." "It's a nightmare." "Did you see me?" "Did you see me jump?" "Yeah." "You're an idiot." "You're not drinking." "I can fix that." "Hey, let's just get you out of these wet clothes, okay?" "Come on." "Okay." "♪ and our hearts will slow ♪" "♪ though I know you hold me tight ♪" "♪ wouldn't you try to find ♪" "♪ someone else to do you up ♪" "♪ and you don't know what you like ♪" "Let's get married." "What?" "You're a mess." "I know I am." "I'm tired of it." "So is that your proposal?" "Got a ring?" "How 'bout a champagne cork?" "You're all I have here." "That's not true." "Fine, don't marry me." "Take it one step at a time:" "be my girlfriend." "Why do you wanna be with me?" "Why wouldn't I?" "You're beautiful, you're smart, you're independent." "You have a great ass." "oh, that's hot." "Shut up, okay?" "We're good together and you know it." "So if I say that you're my girlfriend, you're my girlfriend." "Got it?" "Got it." "Trying to act like they don't know who I am." "The party don't stop until I say it stop!" "Oh, you're in charge, daddy." "All right, y'all make some drinks, start losing those clothes, and I'm gonna go fill the tub." "Kaldrick:" "Do somethin'." "Do somethin'!" "Do somethin'." "♪ what'll I do if you never find me again ♪" "♪ sittin' in a province ♪" "♪ a million miles from my friends ♪" "Abby?" "Hello?" "Yeah, hey, Nick, it's Scott." "How's it going?" "Nick:" "It's uh..." "Look, it doesn't matter." "Here's the thing:" "we've been talkin' about it and we're gonna hire both of you." "You..." "Wait, I'm sorry, both of us?" "What is- what is- but what is the "both of us"?" "Scott:" "You and Sabrina." "We just loved that back and forth chemistry you have;" "the way she just totally tore you apart." "That was hilarious, man." "Very, very funny." " Okay, so we start at 9:30 tomorrow." "We can work out the details then, okay?" "Uh, yes, thank you!" "Scott:" "Great!" "And Nick..." "I fought for you;" "Paul did not want you." "So don't let me down." "I won't." "♪ sometimes it's hard to be a woman ♪" "Nick:" "There you are." "I didn't feel like partying." "Bad day?" "What's this?" "Abby, the sex is free, I swear." "It's every penny I own." "My movie got canceled." "No." "Mm-hmm." "Yup." "I'm sorry." "I cleaned every room of the lux and I only got fifty, so" "Wait, you what?" "!" "Yeah, I'm gonna figure out a way to get the rest," "I promise." "Whatever it takes." "I don't wanna move out." "I like living with you." "I like living with you, too." "I got the job." "What?" "!" "I start tomorrow." "Oh my god!" "That's amazing!" "You don't have to clean the rooms any" "It's weird if I put it in there " "But you don't have to clean rooms anymore." "Just take it back." "Wait, have you ever" "Have you ever been in a writers room before?" "No." "I'm terrified." "Do you at least know anyone?" "Uh, no." "Well..." "You are gonna be great." "Yeah, super-great!" "♪ stand by your man ♪" "♪ give him two arms to cling to ♪" "♪ something warm to come to ♪" "♪ when nights are cold and lonely ♪" "♪ stand by your man ♪" "♪ and tell the world you love him ♪" "♪ keep giving all the love you can ♪" "♪ stand by your man ♪" "♪ stand by your man ♪" "You ready for us, papi?" "♪ show the world you love him ♪" "♪ keep giving all the love you can ♪ oh!" "Oh!" "♪ stand by your man ♪"