"Here's what you missed on Glee." "Puck tried to steal an A. T.M. And got stuck in juvie." "As far as badasses go, I'm number "wah."" "Sam and Quinn are sort of a couple, and so are Mike and Tina." "Artie and Brittany went out." "He sort of dumped her." "Now he sort of wants her back." "Kurt's pretty lonely all by himself, and so is Coach Beiste." "Sue keeps trying to get her to quit." "She even baked her cookies." "Are those dog poop cookies?" "That's what you missed on Glee." "[Water Gurgling]" "[Sam Exhales] Ooh!" "Dude." "How do you stand that cold tub?" "I'm used to cold showers dating Quinn." "[Fire Crackling]" "[Quinn] Mm-mmm." "No." "How about a little somethin'-somethin'?" "A little something-something always leads to something more." "I've been there." "Remember?" "When we're prom king and queen, it'll feel just as good as a little something-something." "Been there, dude." "Actually, still there now, but" "How do we find the only two girls in high school that won't put out?" "What do you do though?" "Well, easy." "I just think about the opposite of what I'm doing." "[Screams] Oh, my God!" "I've never actually almost killed a civil servant before." "Well, you have to find something to be your own buzz kill." "You know, something that is totally not hot." "[Beiste] I don't care!" "If you're on this football team, you'll wear a cup." "Hey, ever notice that when the Beiste gets all fired up... her underpants go right up her butt?" "...in your groin with that helmet?" "You think The Nutcracker is just a musical?" " Do you want some 200-pound" " Looks like I found my mailman." "Yes, you did." "[School Bell Rings]" "I take it we have a lot of sweater trains to look forward to this season." "Are you okay?" "[Sighs] Yeah." "Fine." "[School Bell Rings]" "[Will] All right, guys." "Let's get down to business." "First, let's welcome back Noah Puckerman." "Puck, I hope your time in juvie has taught you a lesson or two about right and wrong." "Are you kidding me?" "I ruled that place." "All I did was crack skulls and lift weights all day." "Wow." "What a catch." "Can't believe I ever let you go." "And now, drumroll, Finn... because I have in my hand our competition for sectionals next month." " [Cheering]" " First, the a cappella choir... from the all-boys private school in Westerville... the Dalton Academy Warblers." " All right." " Yeah!" "Okay." "Hold up." "Like a million awesome gay jokes just popped into my head." "And the other team to beat, the Hipsters... a first-year club from the Warren Township continuing education program." "Now, they are a glee club composed entirely... of elderly people getting their high school G.E.D.'s." " Is that legal?" " How are we supposed to compete against adorable old people?" "Are you kidding?" "Brittle bones." "Give one of those old ladies a good-luck pat on the rear, it'll shatter her pelvis." " [Murmuring Agreement]" " Moving on." "Since it seemed... to get you guys jazzed about sectionals last year..." "I want to make this week... our second-annual boys versus girls tournament." "[Cheering]" "So, split up into two groups... and figure out what songs you're gonna sing." "[Rachel] Okay." "I have mashup ideas in my emergency mashup list." "Kurt, gonna say it again." "Boys' team." "[Mercedes] Okay." "How about you put your suggestions" "[Sam] I say we do a whole AC/DC medley." "The lead guitarist drops his pants at every concert." " [Chattering] - [School Bell Rings]" "I know it's not my place to ask, but can you push me down the back staircase?" "My injury should be the same, but it's more lightly populated... so the humiliation won't be as bad." "Relax." "I'm here to take care of you." "You're my boy now." "I don't understand." "I got out of juvie early because I agreed to do community service." "But I ain't picking up trash along the freeway." "That's ghetto." "So I told my proble officer that I knew a cripple that needed some help, and she went for it." " I'm your community service?" " There's no way I'm going back to juvie." "There's no chicks and no kosher meal options up in that place." "Cool." "So we're, like, friends." "Slow down, Professor X. I never said anything about liking you." "Now shut up right quick." "We're gonna steal some food from the cafeteria." "This chair's a great place for hiding stuff." "What is your problem?" "You talking back to me?" " You want a piece of the Fury?" " The Fury?" " That's what I named my fist." " Ooh." "With that level of creativity... you could easily become assistant manager at a rendering plant." "I don't know what that is, but if I find out it's bad... the Fury's gonna find you." "[School Bell Rings]" "Is there anything that I could do?" "No." "This is my hill to climb alone." "Can I be honest?" "I think it's getting to you." "Usually this stuff rolls right off your back." "But lately you've been belligerent, angry, pushing people away." "Can I be honest with you?" "You, like everyone else at this school, are too quick to let homophobia slide." "And your lesson plans are boring and repetitive." "Boys versus girls?" "That doesn't challenge any of us." "You mean because I didn't let you join the girls like you wanted." "[Sighs] To answer your question, yes, I'm unhappy." "And yes, being the only out gay kid at this school gets me down." "But most of all..." "I'm not challenged in the least here." "[School Bell Rings]" "[Will] I'm not tossing the baby out with the bathwater here." "I've totally done that." "We're just making an adjustment." "Boys, you are now doing songs... traditionally sung by girl groups." "And, girls, try some classic rock." "The Who, The Stones." "The more opposite your choice, the more points you get." "Don't worry, gentlemen." "I have this one under control." "Now, obviously for this medley to work..." "I'm gonna have to sing lead... and, of course, when you're singing Diana Ross..." "Bob Mackie-esque marabou feather boas are a must." "Isn't this lesson about opposites?" "I mean, you in a sequin gown and a feather boa is exactly what you'd expect." "Who said anything about a gown?" "Dude, why don't you make yourself useful... and go put some rat poison... in them old folks' Jell-O or visit the Garglers." " The Warblers." " Whatever." "See what they're up to." "You can wear all the feathers you want." "You'll blend right in." "Fine." "Is this hot enough for you?" "Say my name, Sam." "I said say my name." "I said say my name." "Beiste." "You" " Are you okay?" " Yeah." "I could do this for hours." "I know what I heard." "There we were making out, and he said it:" "Beiste." "I think he was picturing making out with her." "That is the most horrific image I can imagine." "Coach, I need help." "I've done everything I can to rehabilitate my image." "I'm getting straight A's, dating the cutest guy at school" "Who would rather be dry-humping She-Hulk." "Oh, dear God." "Why did I say that?" "Now that's what I'm picturing." "You know what kind of disgusting images I'm gonna have to look at to get this out of my head?" "I'm gonna have to go straight to the wound care center." "I'm gonna have to stare at some wounds." "Coach, I really don't know what to do." "Wait." "This may be the opportunity I've been waiting for." "A way to get Beiste out of the school... and your Macaulay Culkin stunt double back in your arms." "What do I have to do?" "We need to go public with your pain... get people talking about this... make Beiste into the next Mary Kay Letourneau." "And you need to give him a piece of your mind- loud and in public." "Show him who's the boss." "Oh, man." "Now I'm picturing the two of them making out during an episode of Who's the Boss?" "[School Bell Rings]" "Shouldn't we be studying geometry?" "Aren't you failing?" "One thing I learned in juvie:" "Cash is king." "Lets people know we're not doing it for free." "You think people are gonna pay us to sing?" "I don't think busking is allowed in school." "Watch and learn, young Jedi in a wheelchair." "This is so badass." "I've never broken the rules like this." "## [Continues]" "# One love #" "# One heart #" "# Let's get together and feel all right #" "# Hear the children cryin' #" "# One love #" "# Hear the children cryin' #" "# One heart #" "# Sayin' give thanks and praise to the Lord #" "# And I will feel all right #" "# Sayin' let's get together and feel all right #" "# Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #" "# Let them all pass all their dirty remarks #" "# There is one question I'd really love to ask #" "# One heart #" "# Is there a place for the hopeless sinner #" "# Who has hurt all mankind just to save his own #" "# Believe me #" "# One love #" " # What about the one heart # - # One heart #" " # What about love # - # Let's get together #" "# And feel all right #" " # As it was in the beginning # - # One love #" " # So shall it be in the end # - # One heart #" " # All right # - # Give thanks and praise to the Lord #" "# Oh #" "# And I will feel all right #" "# Yeah #" "# Let's get together and feel all right ##" "[Girl] Whoo!" "All right!" "Whoo!" "Holy crap." "There's, like, 300 bucks in here." "Yeah." "You really can't put a dollar amount on the value of talent plus fear." "I can." "It's about 300 bucks." "What are we gonna do with it?" "Buy a buttload of clove cigarettes, then I don't know." "[Chattering]" "You want her?" "You don't need any cash for that." "She's free." "She was my first." "Now I" " I think I want her back." " So go get her." " It's not that simple." " I was kind of mean to her when I blew her off." " This is perfect." "The thing about chicks is you only have to be a fraction as nice to them... as you are mean to them to get them to like you again." " So what do we do?" " Here's a little community service comin' at ya." "You and I are gonna take this dough... and go on a double date with Santana and Brittany to the Sticks." "Yeah." "Best community servicer ever, right?" "[Chattering]" " [Boy] The senior commons." " [Boy #2] Right." "Excuse me." "Um, hi." "Can I ask you a question?" "I'm new here." "My name's Blaine." "Kurt." " So, what exactly is going on?" " The Warblers." "Every now and then they throw an impromptu performance in the senior commons." "It tends to shut the school down for a while." "So, wait." "The glee club here is kind of cool?" "The Warblers are like rock stars." "Come on." "I know a shortcut." "[Chattering]" "Ooh, I stick out like a sore thumb." "Well, next time don't forget your jacket, new kid." "You'll fit right in." " Now, if you'll excuse me." " ## [Vocalizing]" "# Before you met me I was all right #" "# But things were kind of heavy You brought me to life #" "# Now every February #" "# You'll be my valentine #" "# Valentine #" "# Let's go all the way tonight #" "# No regrets #" "# Just love #" "# We can dance until we die #" "# You and I will be young forever #" "# You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream #" "# The way you turn me on #" "# I can't sleep #" "# Let's run away and don't ever look back #" "# Don't ever look back #" "# Let's go all the way tonight #" "# No regrets #" "# Just love #" "# We can dance until we die #" "# You and I will be young forever #" "# You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream #" "# The way you turn me on #" "# I can't sleep #" "# Let's run away and don't ever look back #" "# Don't ever look back #" "# I'm-a get your heart racing in my skintight jeans #" "# Be your teenage dream tonight #" "# Ooh, ahh #" "## [Vocalizing]" "# Yeah #" "# You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream #" "# The way you turn me on #" "# I can't sleep #" "# Let's run away and don't ever look back #" "# Don't ever look back #" " # No # - # My heart stops #" "# When you look at me #" "# Just one touch #" "# Now, baby, I believe #" "# This is real #" " # So take a chance # - # Whoa, whoa, don't ever look back #" "# Don't ever look back #" "# I'm-a get your heart racing in my skintight jeans #" "# Be your teenage dream tonight #" "# Let you put your hands on me in my skintight jeans #" "# Be your teenage dream tonight ##" "[Applause, Cheering]" "[Chattering]" "[Tina] Wait." "That's hilarious." "Picturing Beiste helps cool you off?" " That's what Sam said." " Really?" "Well, then let's get a room." " I love making out under the stars." " Mmm." "With those abs, you could be my very own Situation." "Slow down." "Can't get caught in here." "We should probably cool off." "But I'm so turned on right now." "This'll cool you down a little bit." "Beiste." " What did you just say?" " Nothing." "I gotta go." "I'll see you in Glee Club." ""Beiste"?" "[Quinn] Just be honest with me." "I won't get mad at you if you tell me the truth." "I'll be relieved." "Really?" "Because it looks like you're gonna be mad, no matter what I say." "You said another woman's name while you were kissing me." "Look." "I get it." "She's in a position of power over you, which can be exciting... and you clearly like women who give you a hard time." "I'm not cheating on you with my football coach." "Look." "Can we talk about this in private?" " Why?" "Am I embarrassing you?" " It's not what you think." "What I think is that I'm not putting out for you... so you're getting it wherever you can, including the locker room with the Beiste." "What's this?" "This is a lovers' quarrel, and it's your fault." "Watch your tone with me, missy." "You crap on my leg, I'll cut it off." "I'll leave you two." "Everything okay?" "L" "Stay away from my woman." "What the hell's goin' on around here?" "What's going on, Sam?" "How many of the guys have done this?" "All the guys whose girlfriends won't put out." " It's the girls too." " This is really bad, guys." "What if Coach Beiste were to find out about it?" " Think about how hurt she'd be." " It's not personal." "Of course it's personal." "Look." "Coach Beiste is like us- like Glee Club." "She's an outsider at this school." "No one appreciates her or her talent... because they've decided that she's too different." "And for you guys to abuse that, even in private... is the opposite of everything we're trying to achieve in here." "But we're just thinking about it." "It's not like we're actually making fun of her to her face." "I need you to stop." "And spread the word to all the other Glee guys- and girls." "This ends here and now." "And Coach Beiste can never know about this." "Okay." " Sorry." " [School Bell Rings]" " [Blaine] Latte?" " Thank you." "This is Wes and David." "It's very civilized for you to invite me for coffee before you beat me up for spying." "We are not going to beat you up." "You were such a terrible spy, we thought it was sort of endearing." "Which made me think that spying on us wasn't really the reason you came." "Can I ask you guys a question?" "Are you guys all gay?" "[All Chuckle]" "Uh, uh, no." "I mean, I am, but these two have girlfriends." "This is not a gay school." "We just have a zero-tolerance harassment policy." "Everybody gets treated the same, no matter what they are." "It's pretty simple." "Would you guys excuse us?" "Yeah." "Take it easy, Kurt." "I take it you're having trouble at school." "I'm the only person out of the closet at my school." "And l-l-l" " I tried to stay strong about it... but there's this Neanderthal who's made it his mission to make my life a living hell." "And nobody seems to notice." "I know how you feel." "I got taunted at my old school, and it really" " It pissed me off." "I even complained about it to the faculty, and they were sympathetic and all... but you could just tell that nobody really cared." "It was like..." ""Hey, if you're gay, your life's just gonna be miserable." "Sorry." "Nothing we can do about it."" "So I left." "I came here." "Simple as that." "So you have two options." "I mean, I'd love to tell you to just come enroll here... but tuition at Dalton's sort of steep, and I know that's not an option for everybody... or you can refuse to be the victim." "Prejudice is just ignorance, Kurt." "And you have a chance right now to teach him." "How?" "Confront him." "Call him out." "I ran, Kurt." "I didn't stand up." "I let bullies chase me away, and it is something that I really, really regret." "[School Bell Rings]" "The boys beat us the last time we competed against them." "We've gotta bring the noise hard this time." "[Quinn] To be fair, they didn't officially beat us." "We got busted for vitamin "D" possession before the vote." "Wait." "Something's definitely wrong." "Why isn't Rachel talking?" "Yeah, she should totally be bossing us around right now." "The idea of the assignment was to do the opposite of what we normally do." "I'm just trying to stick to the lesson plan, which is proving nearly impossible... since you're gluing those sequins on backwards." " Spies!" " Lighten up." "We're here to talk to Santana and Brittany." "Remember." "Don't trust your instincts." "Hmm." "So, how does it feel to be a free man?" "All I can say is that I don't want a long-term relationship with either of you." "Especially Brittany, since I'm not in love with her." "Do you guys want to go out to dinner tonight?" "Not really." " Oh." " Tell you what." "You two show up at Breadsticks tomorrow night around 7:00... and if we don't find hotter chicks to date tonight, we might show up." "[Santana Chuckles]" " You are totally cool." " Awesome." "[Mouthing Words]" "I can't believe it." "You're a genius." "[School Bell Rings]" "Hey, Will." "Can I talk to you for a second?" " Yeah." " What's going on with your Glee Club kids?" "They've been mouthing off to me." "One of them even said to stay away from their girl." "I don't get it." "You know, I'm the coach here, Will... and if the students here don't respect me..." "I can't do my job." "Well, Coach... I" " I don't know what to tell you." "Will, please." "Be straight with me." "You're the only person at this school I trust." "Please." "[Sighs]" "Why don't you have a seat." "Uh" "This is really awful." "And I don't want you to take it personally." "I mean, they're just kids." "You know how they can be." "Just" " Just tell me." "[Sighs]" "I guess... it's become sort of a- a thing... that, when the kids are making out, and... you know, they- they sort of want to... cool off a little... they think of you... in compromising positions." "Like what?" "Like... in lingerie." "Coach, don't take it personally." "I do take it personally, Will." "I take it very, very personally." "No, Shannon." "Shannon, wait." "L" "[Groans]" "[School Bell Rings]" "So there I was, at juvie, in the breakfast line in the mess hall... when I noticed me and the guy behind me going for the same waffle." "This guy's 6'11 ", 300 easy." "He's got his teeth filed into canines, tats everywhere." "It gets better." "So I turn around..." "I flex my left pec, and I flex my right pec, and I say to the guy..." ""Leggo my Eggo."" "And you know what he does?" "He lets go of my Eggo." "That's right." "You should be our nation's president." "Maybe." "I've been squeezing your leg for like the last hour and a half." "Are you not attracted to me?" "Sorry." "I was really distracted by our waitress." "She's totally into me." "I can take that when you're ready." "Thank you." "All right, guys." "Let's move." "This meal has been comped." "What?" "Dude, I don't pay for food." "It's my thing, yo." "So we're going to dine and dash." "Let's go." "Do you need any change?" "Keep it." "Thanks." "What the hell was that about?" "Sorry." "I couldn't do it." "She gave us free refills, and I figure she's got kids." "I'm not gonna do that to her." "Whatever, dude." "You wussed out." "So have fun taking the short bus home, 'cause I'll be escorting these lovely ladies... back to Chez Puckerman for a little sookie-sookie." " Wait." "Seriously?" " Damn straight." "I'm giving you all my trade secrets here." "If you don't want my help, then fine." "You're on your own." " ##[Rock] - # Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa #" "# Start me up #" "# Whoa, whoa, whoa #" "# Start me up #" " # Oh, Tommy used to work on the docks # - ## [Vocalizing]" "# Union's been on strike He's down on his luck #" "# It's tough #" "# Oh, so tough #" "# Oh, we gotta hold on ready or not #" "# You live for the fight when that's all that you've got #" "# Start me up #" "# We're halfway there #" "# Oh, oh #" "# Livin' on a prayer #" " # If you start me up # - [All Grunt]" "# Kick on the starter Give it all you got #" "# You got, you got #" " # You got # - # I can't compete #" "## [Vocalizing]" "# With the riders in the other heat #" "# Yeah, yeah #" " # You gotta hold on # - # I'll make a grown man cry #" " # I'll make a grown man # - # Give it a shot #" "# Start me up #" "# We're halfway there #" "# Oh, oh #" "# Livin' on a prayer #" "# Livin' on a prayer #" "## [Electric Guitar Solo]" " # Oh, we gotta hold on, ready or not # - # Ready or not #" "# You live for the fight when that's all that you've got #" "# Oh #" " # We're halfway there # - # We're halfway there #" " # Oh, oh, livin' on a prayer # - # Oh, livin' on a prayer #" "# Take my hand and we'll make it, I swear #" "# Oh, oh #" "# We're livin' on a prayer #" "# Livin' on a prayer #" "# You gotta start me up ##" " [Will] Whoo!" " [Applause]" "[Chuckles] Ladies, very, very impressive." " What was it that made you, uh, guys choose those songs?" " Well" "Coach said to give you this." "[Santana] I guess 'cause last year was so bad." "Take a good look, William, because Sue Sylvester's got two things to show you." "To my left, I have one confetti cannon." "To my right, you'll find another confetti cannon." " You know what that means?" " [Scoffs] No, Sue." "We got Beiste fired." "And my full budget is restored." "[Beeps]" "[Cackling]" "Wait." "What?" "Well, actually, she quit, but I'll take the "W."" "And it was your kids who made it happen, Will." "It finally occurred to them to stop singing all that nonsense... about how awesome it is to be alive or ugly... or whatever the point is you guys are always trying to make... and instead, they just got mean." "Congratulations, Will." "Wait." "Coach Beiste quit?" "I believe I just said that, Annie Sullivan." "You want me to sign it into your palm?" "And now, if you'll excuse me" "And if you wouldn't mind just cleaning all this up, that'd be great." "[School Bell Rings]" "Hey!" " I am talking to you!" " The girls' locker room's next door." "What is your problem?" " Excuse me?" " What are you so scared of?" "Besides you sneaking in here to peek at my junk?" "Yeah." "Every straight guy's nightmare:" "That all us gays are secretly out to molest and convert you." " Well, guess what, ham hock." "You're not my type." " That right?" "Yeah." "I don't dig on chubby boys who sweat too much and are gonna be bald by the time they're 30." " Do not push me, Hummel." " You gonna hit me?" " Do it." " Don't push me." "Hit me, 'cause it's not gonna change who I am." "You can't punch the gay out of me any more than I can punch the ignoramus out of you." " Get out of my face!" " You are nothing but a scared little boy... who can't handle how extraordinarily ordinary you are!" "[Door Opens, Closes]" " [School Bell Rings]" " Well, I genuinely hope you guys are happy... because Coach Beiste has quit." " Wait." "What?" "That's terrible." " Yeah, that's not what we want." "That's the opposite of what we want." "The football team is actually winning." "Then you'd better put your heads together and find a way to get her back, fast... because I am actually ashamed of you." "You really hurt someone who is a great addition to this school." "I'm sorry." "What exactly did we do?" " No, no." "It's us." "The boys." " And Tina." "We sort of figured out that picturing Beiste while making out... was even better than a cold shower." "Uh, I" " I mean, I don't ever." "Oh, wow." "I'm" " I'm sorry." "Can I just say that this is what happens when people don't put out." "If everyone just put out, we would have a winning football team." "William, I need to see you and Noah Puckerman in my office, please." "This is garbage!" "I've been doing my community service." "When you wrote "hanging with a crip" on your probation application... we thought you were gonna do outreach with a local gang." "But I've totally been helping Artie." "I got him a date." "I made him some sweet cash." "Please, Mr. Schue, you've gotta help me out here." "Ms. Martin, there's gotta be some way Puck can make up for this." "He's been a model student since he got back." "Three whole days' worth." "Impressive." "Look." "There are rules." "If Mr. Puckerman doesn't find a suitable alternative... for his community service by tomorrow, his probation will be revoked... and he'll have to go back to the Mondale School for the Boys." "Screw that." "I am not going back there." "Mr. Puckerman, calm down." "No, you calm down!" "All of you calm down!" "I told you." "I'm not going back there." "What are you writing?" "Give me that." "Puck!" "This isn't helping." "Helping?" "Since when does any one of you care about helping me?" "None of you care about me." "L" "[School Bell Rings]" " Thanks again for coming." " Don't worry about it." "Just let me do the talking." " There he is." " I got your back." "[Blaine] Excuse me." "Hey, lady boys." "[Scoffs] This your boyfriend, Kurt?" " Kurt and I would like to talk to you about something." " I gotta go to class." " Kurt told me what you did." " Oh, yeah?" "What's that?" "You kissed me." "I don't know what you're talking about." "It seems like you might be a little confused, and that's totally normal." "This is a very hard thing to come to terms with... and you should just know that you're not alone." "Do not mess with me!" "You have to stop this!" "[Exhales]" "[Exhales]" "Well, he's not coming out any time soon." "What's going on?" "Why are you so upset?" "Because, up until yesterday, I had never been kissed." "Or at least, one that counted." "Come on." "I'll buy you lunch." "[Sniffles]" "Didn't make you for a quitter." "Don't, Will." "You have no idea what it's like." "For what it's worth, my kids feel awful." "And they like you." "They respect you." "Isn't that just what every girl wants to hear from a guy?" "Nah." "Screw this." "I'll find my bliss somewhere else." "I need a life change." "You know, maybe I'll get a job as a cooler at a honky-tonk bar." "I don't know." "Maybe an ice road trucker." "Stop." "Just stop." "I get it." "All of us are scarred by high school." "Next to our parents, nothing screws a person up more." "And" " And people like us- [Chuckles]" "We're stupid enough to come back here and relive that pain every day." " [Chuckles] Right?" " Yeah." "I'm not gay, you know." "I know I can be a little intimidating sometimes... but deep down inside, where no one can see..." "I'm just a girl." "Am I nuts that I just want to be reminded of that sometimes?" "Well, that's what dating is for." "[Scoffs]" "Last date I went on, the guy was a freak." "All he wanted to do was wrestle." "Well, let me help you out then." "I'm sure there are plenty of guys" "No, there aren't." "I'm kind of a specific type, Will." "Well, you gotta put yourself out there, try online dating." "I've never been kissed, Will." "It's the simplest thing." "A kiss." "It's the doorway to everything else, you know." "Promise, hope." "A" " A future with someone." "What's that say about me?" "I'm 40, and I haven't even taken those baby steps yet." "What that says to me... is that you are a beautiful... amazing woman... whose heart is just too big for most men to stand." "You really think I'm pretty, Will?" "Inside and out." "And now you've been kissed." "Come to the choir room, tomorrow at 4:00." "The guys want to apologize to you in person." "Are you tricking me into a make out session, Schuester?" "[Both Chuckle]" "[School Bell Rings]" "I didn't see you in Geometry today." "Jackpot." "No, you didn't." "I'm gettin' out of here." "Skippin' town, genius." "My probation officer says hanging out with you isn't real community service... so if I don't spend the next six weeks picking up garbage on the highway... they're gonna send me back to juvie." "So?" "What's wrong with picking up trash?" "Are you serious?" "That's ghetto, dude." "I'm not a garbageman." "You know how humiliating that is?" "I'm not doing it, and I'm not going back to juvie." "Why?" "I thought you loved it there." "Yeah?" "I lied." "It was frickin' terrifying, dude." "On the first day, three gangbangers jumped me... and before the security guards could pull 'em off, they'd already tore out my nipple ring." "I thought I was a badass." "There are some hard dudes in there." "Guys with no families, guys who look at you... like you're some kind of dog they can't wait to kick the crap out of." "And they kept taking my waffles." "So, you'll be my community service." "What?" "I owe you." "You got me a date with Brittany." "You made me feel cool, which is not the easiest thing to do." "I really like hanging out with you, so... let me tutor you in geometry while you pick up garbage by the highway." "Geometry's easy, yo." "There's no excuse for a guy as smart as you not to get at least a "B."" "I was kind of a jerk to you at Breadsticks." " Whatever." "Just pay me back for the pasta." " [School Bell Rings]" "[Door Opens]" "Running out without paying was a stupid idea." "If I got caught, I'd be screwed." "You need to start hanging around someone who's a good influence on you, Puck." "Give me six weeks." "If you don't ace your geometry midterm..." "I swear I'll buy you all the waffles you can eat." "That's dope, dude." "You got a deal." "[Whistles]" "I don't get it." "It's boys against the girls... but what's the winner get?" "We were hoping for your forgiveness." "Yeah." "We just wanted to apologize for hurting your feelings." "Coach Beiste, we think you're awesome." "And even though you're all hard and tough on the outside... it doesn't mean you're not the opposite on the inside." " Like a chocolate turtle." " Totally." "You're nougatty." "We totally get that now." "You're like a mashup." " Why don't you guys just get to the song." " Totally." "This mashup is dedicated to you, Coach- hard and badass on one hand and soft and girlie on the other." "We hope it makes you smile, 'cause when you smile, you're pretty... and it lights up the room." "Seriously." "## [Pop]" "# Here we go #" "# Stop in the name of love #" "# Before you break my heart Think it over #" "# I wear tight clothing high-heeled shoes #" "# It doesn't mean that I'm a prostitute No, no #" "# I like rap music wear hip-hop clothes #" "# That doesn't mean that I'm out selling dope #" "# No, no, no #" "## [Vocalizing]" "# Before you can read me you've got to learn how to see me #" "# I said Stop in the name of love #" "# Before you break my heart #" " # Think it over # - # Free your mind #" "# And the rest will follow #" "# Be color-blind Don't be so shallow #" "# I've known of your your secluded nights #" "# I've even seen her maybe once or twice #" "# But is her sweet expression #" "# Worth more than my love and affection #" "## [Vocalizing]" "# Before you can read me you've got to learn how to see me #" "# I said Stop in the name of love #" " # Before you break my heart # - # Before you break my heart, no, stop #" " # Think it over # - # Free your mind and the rest will follow #" " # Oh, oh # - # Be color-blind, Don't be so shallow #" "# Don't break my- Don't break my heart #" "# Stop in the name of love #" "# Free your mind #" " # Stop # - # Free your mind #" "## [Vocalizing]" "# Before you can read me you've got to learn how to see me #" "# I said #" "# Stop in the name of love #" " # Before you break my heart # - # Before you break my heart #" " # Free your mind # - # Stop #" "# In the name of love #" " # Stop, stop # - # Before you break my heart #" "# Think it over #" "# Free your mind and the rest will #" "# Stop ##" "[Cheering]" "It was really good." "I liked it." "Thank you." "Get over here." "Come on." "[Will] All right." "[Beiste Chuckling]" "##[Vocalizing]" "##[Harmonic Vocalizing]" "##[Ends]" "English" " US" " SDH"