"THE LAND WHOSE KING IS A CHILD" "A new school term brings anxiety." "Will our boys have changed?" "A good year so far." "God blesses our work." "As a whole, the standard is high." "Behaviour is good." "The comfort this school brings must not allow us to forget that in spite of an increase of 17 communions on last October," "faith is, as always, our weak spot." "I know what I'm doing." "I want, and until now have had, a healthy college." "Healthy not only morally but also in the mind, for a Christian cannot compromise high-mindedness." "We are a family, we must feel at ease." ""Flies... but one fly, dying in the perfume will spoil its fine aroma."" "Sevrais!" "I'm waiting for Souplier, Sir." "Friends from another section are forbidden." "And he's bad company." "Everybody complains." "His teachers, classmates, parents..." "He promised to change." "He promised you." "So you did see each other?" "Briefly, at my father's funeral." "I'm a boarder now." "Oh, no!" "We won't see each other much." "Only on Sundays at 10 o'clock, when school breaks." "When I'm away this is what I miss, the smell of the school." "Guess what?" "You know Maisonfort." "The one we call Warbler." "He said: "Scratch my barnet."" ""Your what?" "My hair."" ""Why?" "Because it makes me purr."" ""You purr?"" ""Yes, I purr inside."" "His legs are fat." "You're no judge." "He has great legs." "Like the Romans had." "No, he's clumsy." "Clumsy!" "He's winning the race!" "Sevrais, Linsbourg, what about your Greek class?" "These ink stains!" "Always hot and grubby paws!" "Hair never combed, never!" "It's my knee that hurts." "It's nothing." "Just a graze." "Use your handkerchief." "Is it clean?" "Not very." "Ink-stained, of course." "Take mine." "Give it back to me after prep." "But don't tell anyone I lent it to you, there'd be a fuss." "Wash your knee in the fountain." "He must learn!" "It won't happen again, will it?" "No, Sir." "Good evening." "Monsieur Prial... someone will call for this tomorrow, it's the article they want for Te Living God." "I look forward to reading it." "Well, answering the question "Who is God?"" "In 9 pages of double spacing..." "But metaphysics allow one to say many things..." "Good night, Monsieur Prial." "It will be cold tonight." "Your handkerchief, Sir." "Your friendship with Sevrais must end." "But, Sir... no one says anything to the other boys." "Never mind why we occasionally turn a blind eye on..." "All right, I'll explain." "As everyone knows, I take an interest in you." "Why should my efforts be spoiled by this boy I hardly know?" "I know him by repute!" "Sevrais's the best!" "The best?" "He's intelligent, bright, they say he's noble-minded, but he's a humbug, independent, sure of himself." "As for you, you're a trouble." "You met Sevrais in the hall today." "Only for a moment, I know!" "It was when the day-boys go home." "What did you talk about?" " Nothing." " Naturally." "Twice this year, you were to be expelled, twice I persuaded the Supêrieur to keep you with us." "My intervening constantly makes me look foolish..." "Are you listening?" "Yes, Sir." "Repeat what I said." "You said... that I don't pay attention during mass." "I said nothing of the sort." "Please stop fiddling with the things on my desk." "You know I'm badly brought up." "Yes, I know that." "I'm tired of you, Souplier, terribly tired of you." "You are a pitiful soul." "I wonder if you're worth the trouble." "I promise this time..." "I'm tired of your promises too." "Say that I'm with the headmaster and cannot be disturbed at present." "Where were we?" "Yes, I'm tired of your promises." "The other times, I just promised." "Now I swear it." "I know only too well..." "If you know only too well..." "No, you musn't think your word means nothing." "I think about you a great deal." "Even last June when... my father was dying" "and you faced expulsion, you were uppermost in my thoughts... even then." "I told you that, you remember?" "You don't?" "I don't want to be tactless." "You don't care, do you?" "When thinking of you lately" "I told myself" "I knew you as though you were my own son." "You smile?" "No, I'm not." "One of your little smiles." "Something silly made me smile." "What silly thing?" "Please, one moment of sincerity." "I smiled because you were doodling." "Yes, I was doodling on my blotting-pad... thinking of you." "Why are you so good to me?" "Because you deserve it." "How is your work going?" "I have German homework." "Leave it, and tomorrow I'll help you with your German." "Not doing too well at the choir, are you?" "You have a nice voice, yet you spoil even that." "Is it so difficult for you to be polite?" "Yes, it's very difficult." "At times, I wonder what you think of me, how you judge me, if in that obstinate head, you are in favour or not." "Sir, in favour!" "All right, then." "Run along to the dormitory!" "Here's a note for the master." "Look at the time!" "From Monsieur de Pradts." "Go to bed!" "There's a note under your pillow." "Sevrais gave it to Denis in Physics, and Denis gave it to me at supper." "Dear Serge," "I don" mind your being a boarder." "Anyting des'ined 'o be good for you can only be good." "How am I 'o know you better, unders'and you better and be a good influence, seeing you once a week?" "If you're no' kep' in on Sunday, come 'o 'e Cave and paddle inside." "Do no' read; "Piddle."" "I have a cold." "You always have colds." "Do you hide my letters?" "In my desk, under my books." " If De Pradts looks..." " He won't!" "I wouldn't mind if he did find them." "Hope no one else does, though." "He gave us a talking-to today." "Everyone in my section." "And he gave names." ""There will be no more of those friendships."" ""Linsbourg-Denis, Sevrais-Souplier..."" "All the names, all the incidents." "So what will you do?" "I say we go on." "And you?" "It's forbidden, so I'll go on too." "Just once more before we go." "In line!" "Well, what is it?" "Sir," "I know you think my influence on Souplier goes against yours." "If my influence is bad, I'm prepared to break with him." "Sit down." "So, you offer to break with Souplier." "If it's to put us at ease, we are not meant to be at ease." "But if you feel it's for the best," "I'll admit that I agree." "Has he talked about me?" "What does he think of me?" "He speaks well of you." "But tell me, what has he said?" "You don't want to say." "How long have you been friends?" "Since January 14th." "January 14th." "And we're in April." "I congratulate you." "You fooled us." "No, we didn't." "We behaved." "You behaved." "I marvel at your discretion." "Boys can be so discreet." "Just as discreet as women, if not more so." "I had no other choice." "January 14th." "There must have been something very special about that day, for you to remember the date so well." "We had a misunderstanding." "He said I didn't care for him." "I told him:" ""I do care for you."" "And that was all?" "Yes, that was all." "One moment." "Come in." "Your surplice, Monsieur I'Abbê." "My wife starched and ironed it, but the lace is fraying and in her opinion..." "It can wait." "Thank your wife for her trouble." "We won't be disturbed now." "By the way, who is your confessor here?" "I go to a priest in my parish." "That fits with the rest." "Everyone knows that you're the only day-boy in your section." "Free." "To act as you please." "To have as few ties as possible." "Except with Souplier, of course." "Any tokens of eternal friendship?" "We exchanged our pens." "No pledges?" "No romantic words?" "He said: "For always."" "I said: "For as long as possible."" "Since then, meetings, little gifts, notes." "Notes, you a day-boy, he a boarder." "Long letters from you, notes from him, always marked "To be burnt"," "dated midnight, at least yours." "Have you seen them?" "Do you think yourself original?" "Does your mother know?" "Just as well." "Parents and the school are two distinct worlds, do not mix them." "I'd rather you stopped concealing." "You have loyalty, your presence here proves it." "That being so, perhaps an alliance would be better... than war." "I may take a gamble on your loyalty and allow you to go on seeing Souplier, if I have your word" "you'll be beyond reproach." "Sir, I give you my word." "I believe... in the power of true affection." "Its power is such, it could carry the world away." "God grants us the grace to love someone." "Thank you, Sir, it's so good of you." "Please note that I may be "good" sometimes, but that I'm not "a good fellow"." "Make subtle differences." "I always do." "Like "behaviour" and "hypocrisy"." "Come again, at any time." "If you find a lady here, come straight in." "It will a boy's mother, she'll leave..." "Thank you, Sir." "For everything." "And also for being what you are." "Oh, what we are..." "You pig!" "Brute!" "Sevrais, protect me!" "Why didn't you hit him?" "They call him Bonbon." "He's rat poison!" "I have to talk to you." "How he talked about you!" "He knows all about kids." "The same man that stormed at us last Sunday." "I'm overwhelmed." "What happened?" "I don't want to let him down, he wants you to improve." "I've hurt you, it seems." "So I decided I'd change my ways, and we'd be serious." "I saw De Pradts and told him about this change." "Don't you remember what you told me in the cave?" "Yes, I asked you what you would do." "You said: "I'll carry on."" "Then I said:" ""I'll go on too, because it's forbidden."" "I've changed." "I've found the good in me." "Now I know the truth, the truth for you and for me." "All right, if you think it's best." "I'll be to you what you want me to be." "It will be different!" "A new life!" "A comradeship-in-arms, like in the days of chivalry!" "What a relief, not to hide, not to lie!" "Sevrais and Souplier..." "I saw them go into the storeroom." "It's quite all right, I'll explain." "We'll talk more on Sunday." "Not Sunday, I'm being kept in." "Not again!" "Why?" "I larked about at Gym." "I like larking about at Gym." "Is it really fun to act the fool?" "It's fun at my age." "Look, I can't wait a whole week, it's impossible." "Come here tomorrow before prep." "Tell your master you've got choir practice." "The storeroom will be locked." "I have a key." "I sell tuck at break," "I'll say I'm checking the tuck money." "You say you want to be a good influence on me, but you want me to skip prep and tell lies." "But De Pradts gave us permission." "If I can come, I'll draw a cross on the lavatory door." "Bless us, O Lord, bless this food, those who prepared it and grant bread to the hungry." ""After Jesus fed the multitude, when the day began to wear away, he went up alone into a mountain to pray" "while his apostles sailed the Lake of Tiberias to go unto the other side." "Suddenly a storm arose." "The water raged, the wind blew, and they were sorely afraid." "You men of little faith, said Jesus," "Why did you not trust my love?"" "Souplier approved of!" "I can't get over it!" "You haven't heard?" "After that speech against Sevrais-Souplier," "De Pradts now says that this friendship is allowed, and almost exemplary." "I must say, the Sevrais-Souplier friendship seems most odd." "Yet officially approved of!" "The school's best and the school's worst!" "De Pradts likes Souplier to act as a whipping-boy." "Then he can be soft-hearted." "De Pradts is a remarkable man." "He and the Supêrieur are both remarkable, but he's a man of passion." "True, education is a passion." "Especially Souplier's." "It's a bit much!" "Wasn't De Pradts to go to Rome?" "He refused so that he could stay on here." "How humble of him!" "He's so condescending to the masters." "You know what he says!" ""We welcome teachers here out of charity."" "As for us assistants!" "He treats us as he treats the caretaker." "Gentlemen, quiet!" "You'll be kept in!" "I'm already being kept in." "Well, on the following Sunday too." "Well done!" "A shrewd move!" " What?" " You and De Pradts!" "Nothing shrewd, I don't want my influence to upset the Abbê's." "Yet here you are, with official blessing!" "The others might resent that." "Listen, about our new friendship, Souplier said:" ""If only the others did the same!"" "You'd better be on our side!" "You really do love him?" "Is it so incredible?" "Souplier's parents are behind with the fees." "Never pay on time." "It's De Pradts that insisted on free singing lessons." "Now he'll know I love him!" "If he knew, he wouldn't grasp it." "If he did, he'd be afraid." "Does your mother know?" "Does your mother know?" "Not in detail." "Just like Gaboriau." "He says he confesses everything, but leaves out the details." "So she accepts Souplier?" "Yes, so that I may accept her." "I don't get it." "She knows he's teacher's pet?" "No, I didn't tell her that." "All the same..." "What?" "She said De Pradts is jealous." "What did you say?" "A woman's reaction!" "I'm not jealous of anyone good to him." "She can't understand." "Go on." "Be quick." "Thank you, Sir." "Still those holes!" "Holes, Sir?" "There." "That's an aperture." "Reflections on Fallen Priests by l'Abbê de Prad's" "I was afraid I'd be late." "You'd have waited, wouldn't you?" "Until when?" "Until five to." "Too risky after that." "Thanks!" "At break, everyone pushes," "I give the wrong change." "I'm losing money." "De Pradts talked to me." "For an hour and ten minutes!" "Imagine!" "You said I'd soon be fed up with our new life." "I said: "I hope he won't be fed up."" "It's not the same." "What else?" "I never believe bad things about you." "Such as?" "Well, he's not too keen on you." "Then why let us be friends?" "Something escapes me." "Did you offer to break with me?" "If he'd accepted, what then?" "Would you have ignored me in the street?" " Would it upset you?" " Not you?" "I don't know what I'd have done." "These stupid socks keep slipping!" "He asked if I loved you." "What did you say?" "That with us, it was a matter of death and life." "And what did he say?" "That my French was incorrect." "You must do better from now on." "Finish it." "It makes me feel sick." "Next week, I must have 16 in conduct." "No, that's too high." "13 or 14." "He said I must improve." "He makes you cry, he consoles you" "but as he consoles you, you cry again." "He knows how to win you over!" "He wants me to go to his country house for a week with other boys in my section." "To get me away." "From whom?" "From me?" "Still, he's very fond of you." "You ought to go." "You know it'd be good for you." "I so dearly want for you to become someone really good." "What's your worst subject?" "All of them." "I'm a difficult child." "I'm a bother to my parents." "Honestly, I'm impossible." "I just won't obey anyone." "What a shame I'm not your brother!" "You do so much for me." "Would you die for me?" "Supposing I were drowning..." "I'd dive in." "But not after eating." "How about you?" "If I fell down a precipice..." "That depends." "How deep a precipice?" "If it was 500 feet deep then obviously I wouldn't go down but... if it was a small precipice, yes." "Later, Monsieur Habert." "As it's "a matter of death and life", we could make a blood pact." "Do you know about that?" "Linsbourg and Devie did it, four years ago." "Devie was only ten." "So did Lasseille and Béchaud." "But we keep quiet about it." "I swear that our friendship shall remain the same." "Do you agree?" "And I swear I'll never act in my own interest, only yours." "Well, I never want you to be disappointed in me." "Unhappy, perhaps." "Never disappointed." "What about Souplier?" "Where is he?" "Let me by." "Move aside!" "Did it hurt?" "No, not in the least." "Yes, I can see it hurt." "A little." "It should." "And if I gashed your face, for fun, what would you say?" "I'd forgive you." "I'm going to!" "Do it then, so I can forgive you." "How right I was to love you!" "I love you but..." "I'm not in love with you." "You do know that?" "I know." "Who's in there?" "André Sevrais." "I'm checking the tuck money." "I'm in charge of that." "It was the gardener." "I'd better go." "Why?" "We're allowed to see each other, aren't we?" "Goodbye." "I'm not staying." "Till Sunday then, after detention." "And be good with De Pradts." "De Pradts is coming!" "Let's wait for him, then." "Don't hide." "It'd give the wrong impression." "Come out of there, you idiot!" "Open the door!" " Who's there?" " The Abbê de Pradts." "What are you doing here?" "I'm checking the tuck money." "I'm in charge of it." "Checking the tuck money." "But you're a day-boy and you should have left the school by now." "I noticed there was 300 francs missing in the box so I had to check before I asked my mother for it." "I locked the door so I wouldn't be disturbed." "Why did you lock the door?" "Why did you hide?" "You made me lie, now everything looks odd." "Why are you afraid?" "Don't be afraid!" "Don't be!" "That's what frightens me, not him." "I'll go tell him everything." "No!" "We'll never see each other again." "You're crazy!" "We'll never see each other again." "It's all over." "You were asked to be of some guidance to this child and this is how you behave," "you little rascal." "You called yourself his friend." "I've been true to my word." "Was it to catch flies that you locked yourselves in?" "A fine result, I trusted you." "I'm to be a good influence over him." "But how?" "Where?" "When?" "Only on Sunday mornings, if he's not kept in." "Stop that, they say you're bright, your defence is that of an imbecile." "Go home." "This is not over." "I will take all the blame." "I should hope that you will take the blame." "Just once more." "Well, Serge," "I think this will have at least one good result." "It has cleared the air." "He'll no longer meddle with your upbringing." "I really must take you in hand again." "This incident shows how weak you still are." "You said your mother would refuse to let you come to the country." "It's up to you to convince her." "I've prevented your expulsion twice." "I can do it a third time but you must help me a little, willingly." "Try to persuade your mother, will you?" "Yes, Sir." "You'll enjoy a holiday in the country." "My old mother will like you, I'm sure." "You'll go boating on the river." "You'll be there with 6 or 7 other boys." "So you'll persuade your parents, won't you?" "You promise?" "Yes, Sir." "Those of you in Philosophy," "I have marked your papers." "I'm first." "First, Giboy." "14 out of 20." "You're first, Giboy but 14 is only fair." "Second, Linsbourg... 13." "Third, Verniquet... 10." "It's only average, Verniquet." "Fourth, Salins... 9." "Fifth, Cathulle... 8." "Sixth, Frécourt... 5." "It would be cruel of me to continue." "The rest is not worth mentioning." "I will now hand out the 5th year's Geography papers." "Less than 5." "It isn't possible." "Yes it is." "Now I understand!" "I'm dismissed like a dishonest servant!" "But no one dares to tell me!" "No one gives me my marks, as though I no longer existed." "You're all cowards!" " You've been expelled." " And my exams?" "They're in 3 months' time." "A new school, new teachers!" "I'll fail!" "You're a bright pupil." "You won't fail." "Other boys meet there, they're not punished!" "Why me?" "If I was in charge here, there'd be no special friendships." "But you, you shut or open your eyes as it suits you!" "I'm sure you're sincere when you despise the indiscipline here." "An indiscipline which you brought about, then took advantage of." "Those words of yours..." ""I believe in the power of true affection." "God grants us the grace to love someone." "Love has the power to carry the world away."" "Why those words?" "What did you mean?" "Those were not my words but those of the Supêrieur." "They were memorable and I have often quoted them." "You were to believe them, but with understanding." "Don't take too tragically this episode of your schooldays." "You'll smile over it when you're twenty." "Never." "There is one thing that may surprise you after what I just said." "You are leaving here esteemed by us all." "Esteemed, but expelled?" "And Souplier?" "Why should we expel him?" "You were the instigator, the one to blame, and I must add, you made free use of the key which we trusted you with." "For Souplier, it's just another folly in the endless chain of his follies." "And to be frank, it may be only now, with you gone, that we can do something for him." "I believed the friendship you felt for him might help him, that is why I tolerated... just tolerated its existence openly." "Are you taking him to the country?" "He told you." "Well, maybe." "He needs a cure, like a drug addict." "That is why it's best you disappear but disappear completely." "What do you mean?" "You must never see him again." "Never see him again?" "Not even outside the school?" "That's unfair!" "Outside, I have every right!" "A word to your families, you'd have no rights at all." "You still threaten me." "Be a good loser." "A good loser." "Is this a game?" "Well... is it a promise?" "Is it a promise?" "I promise." "You are brave." "Did I give him up too quickly?" "I love him enough to give him up." "Loving him less would be easier." "I've hurt others before!" "Boys, mothers, even fathers!" "I've seen those tears before!" "I'm only trying to do what's best for that child." "Your sacrifice may well be your greatest gift to him." "I'm sure he'll be grateful." "I've brought string for..." "A moment, please." "One last thing." "Yesterday you defended yourself, I did not believe you then." "Forgive me, I'm a priest." "I'm like a doctor or a lawyer." "I never believe I'm hearing the whole truth." "Now I do believe what you said," "I want you to know it." "Can't I see him one last time to say goodbye?" "I'm afraid it would be a little melodramatic for something so trite?" "Yes, so trite." "We'll tie up your books." "So you can take them all today." "Best you don't come back." "Now do you see it was a trap?" "Everything was done to lead you on." "From the start." "I know those agen's provoca'eurs!" "I don't know what you mean." "He wanted you out of the way." "I hindered his influence over a pupil he takes care of." "To meet in the storeroom is against the school rules, it's natural that I be expelled." "Your coat." "Don't forget it..." "Being expelled is no reason to fall ill." "Sevrais?" "What do you want?" "To go out, please." "But I've not heard the bell for the day-boys to leave." "I've been expelled." "In that case..." "Well..." "What's keeping you?" "Leave!" "So Sevrais leaves this school for ever, cast out by us, without a farewell to his friend, classmates or teachers." "But this boy shook his hand furtively" "for no apparent reason, or perhaps so that this bleak moment be lit by a spark of human kindness..." "God often acts through children, as we know." "Perhaps this innocent child was an instrument of a higher charity or justice..." "In the future, where will they find justice?" "If only they could find it just once at school, in their priests' souls." "But there you are..." "Poor children." "We too push them about, pulling them this way and that." "We too confuse them." "Poor children, so defenceless." "So defenceless?" "Yes, I repeat, so defenceless." "You say they take advantage of us." "But don't we live with them endlessly taking advantage?" "Certainly not." "Any trouble we cause them, they repay us tenfold." "How did Sevrais take it?" "With a cold distress which I rather liked." "Tears?" " Quickly mastered." " Too quickly!" "We know you love boys' tears." "Mothers' tears." "As some do lovers' tears." "You're a master hand at making matters worse!" ""Rise up, O longed-for storms!"" "That Sevrais loved Souplier, that they were separated, that he confronted me, that he was expelled, all that is good for his education." "By being hurt by us, and hurting us he learnt who we are." "And that will be what this school gave him." "And might it not also have made him a Christian?" "I saw Souplier last night after our talk." "He's the one who locked the storeroom door." "And yet when you accused Sevrais, he didn't deny it?" "No." "To protect the child." "It's tragic that I had to sacrifice this boy because of you." "You made this a drama that could have been avoided." "Why not come to me?" "But to lose Souplier!" "It could have been hushed up, you made a fuss and I had no choice but to expel Sevrais." "Souplier isn't there?" "How do you know?" "I don't hear his voice." "What's wrong?" "Is he ill?" "Is he being punished?" "Has he been suspended from choir because of what happened?" "You would not..." "That's not possible." "It is." "What?" "Souplier is no longer here." "What?" "But last night..." "I made this decision this morning." "You will not!" "The letter was taken to his parents at two." "The Souplier experiment is over." "It has barely begun!" "I thought we could use Sevrais." "You were only too happy to discuss Souplier with him." "Even with me, for any or no reason, you only spoke of him." "Ought I have lied?" "Been more discreet?" "All right!" "His name flew from my heart to my lips." "All my soul..." ""All your soul..."" "What was I saying?" "You know full well." "I would remind you it was not I who first spoke his name." "On Saturday going to class you stood aside to let him pass." "It caused comment." " Children are owed respect." " Agreed." "What about Sevrais?" " He's no child." " A subtle distinction." "Don't press me." "I heard your arguments when I tried to expel him before." "You insisted that I reduce the boarding fees, so much did you want to have him in your power!" "I ask you again, don't press me." "But I must." ""The Souplier experiment is over."" "What do you know of him?" "Did you spare him any time?" "Have you ever spent more than ten minutes with him?" "Please!" "We have 500 pupils." "I believe in the human being!" "I believe in the human being." "A child may be saved by a man's intelligence." "Monsieur le Supêrieur..." "Why hide it?" "I admit in all simplicity, and if I must, in all humility," "that the expulsion of this child would be the greatest grief of my priestly life." "I would wish you to have other griefs in your priestly life." "You say too much." "Such deep concern..." "You are so persistent that I must ask of you another sacrifice." "After Easter need I talk of a love that sacrifices itself?" "I musk ask you to give up your apostolic duty towards this boy, should you intend to see him again." "I was consistently on my guard." "I never allowed him to show any feeling." "Not one word or one gesture too affectionate." "If you can't assure me you'll never see him again" "I'll send him to a country school." "I will not yield." "Spare me that." "For a misunderstanding the best in me is broken." "Only one thing matters." "Love for another being." "Not his love for you." "One's own love." "And who told us that?" "You did." ""Love has the power to carry the world away."" ""God granted us the grace..."" "It is the very essence of our faith." "If you understood differently..." "To have that love brings you closest to what Heaven must be." "Don't make me say more than I did." "I had love for that child." "You've destroyed it and in a way tarnished it," "though it was so pure." "I wish I could forgive you, you meant well." "I can't." "You'll forgive me some day, as I must forgive you your remarks." "Who will I love?" "Whom can I love?" "Who will love him?" "What will become of him?" "I've been his father and mother." "When he arrived here with holes in his socks, buttons missing, who took care of that?" "Who gave him money to buy soap or a nail file when his parents forgot?" "When he lost or gained weight, who noticed but me?" "It is an attachment from which God is excluded." "There is a fire in you!" "It burns but gives no light." "O God, did I never give him light?" "At last!" "God's name on your lips!" "Did you talk to him about God?" "I could have done so more often." "I didn't because he's not meant to have faith." "So you decided!" "And Sevrais?" "Nor him." "They'll always remember their emotions and religion will last in those," "at least an odour of religion." "An odour!" "O God, do I run a school where faith is an odour, not the basis of everything we do?" "Unbelief, in this very school!" "Despite the religious instruction..." "Be quiet!" "It would be..." "No..." "Does one sing like that when one has no faith?" "It's Lartigue." "A fine example." "Shall I tell you what I know?" "The more moving is the singing the more corrupt is the spirit." "It's not true!" "You're making this up!" "You speak rashly!" "Unbelief among the staff too!" "The staff!" "What impels you to..." "I think I know!" "It's my turn to suffer, is that it?" "Enough!" "You've gone too far." "Do you accept the sacrifice I deem necessary for you?" "Always sacrifice!" "Generosity can only exist through sacrifice!" "That's what we learned, that's what we teach." "I forbid you to go on!" "Answer my question." "I accept this sacrifice." "But what does it prove?" "Very little, true, unless one accepts whole-heartedly." "I accept." "I'll never see Souplier again." "Isn't that enough?" "What else do you want?" "I can guess." "You'll ask me not to see him one last time." "It would be "too melodramatic", wouldn't it?" "Like Sevrais, for the same reasons," "Souplier has just left." "How did he take it?" "Did he cry?" "He said:" ""No one will miss me here either."" ""I left a bad memory everywhere I went."" "I told him:" ""You're leaving us a vivid memory."" ""A bad memory" and "a vivid memory" is not the same." "These last weeks when I stayed up late," "I could see your window lit." "The last light, with mine, above the sleeping school." "Of what, of whom were you thinking?" "Now I know." "I was thinking of you then." "However, I prayed for you a prayer that I'm not sure you've ever prayed for that child." "I prayed in my own way." "Tenderness too is a prayer." "I also experienced early in my priesthood" "too exacting a devotion for a soul too frail" "which I wearied." "I was told to entrust it to others." "It was very hard for me." "I did it." "Years later, when the confessor of that soul died, this soul naturally came back to me for advice." "Time had passed, I welcomed it." "One day you'll find Souplier again." "It'll be too late." "Too late?" "What do you mean?" "Are you so far from being Christian?" "Too late!" "You haven't loved a person, you've loved a face, and you admit it!" "Ecclesiastes says: "Woe to the land whose king is a child!"" "You tried to catch me out by quoting my words on love." "Yes, our religion is founded on love but not the love of faces as you very well know." "Our love is another love, even for man." "When it reaches the Absolute, with the Self forgotten, it comes so close to God's love that man seems to have been conceived only to lead us to his Creator." "May you experience such a love and may it lead you in its flowering to that final, all-embracing Love beside which all else is nothing."