"I don't really pray but if you could just help me out here I promise..." "105." "105?" "Oh, my God!" "Run a bath, call the doctor." "Get her into the bath." "Dr. Carter, 655..." "He won 't be there." "What is a thermometer?" "Mercury." "How does it even work?" "Maybe I can page him." "Susan." "Susie." "Mommy says get up now." " Cold." " I know." "Hang on." "Cold!" "It just feels cold because you're so hot." "Susan, stay with me." "Susan." "Susan!" "Has she been disoriented?" "Confused?" "She said that she saw a man in her bedroom." "Are you cold?" "Okay, swing it." " Move it, people." " Is room 2 clear?" "Yes, it's clear." "Get her pressure." "Let's give her O2." "Ten liters." "Tap her right away." "How's her breathing?" "No pulse or rhythm." "Are you God?" "No." "My name is Seth." "Where are we going?" "Home." "Can Mommy come?" "No." "She won't understand." "She will someday." "Can I ask you something?" "Yes." "What did you like best?" "Pajamas." "She definitely knew what she liked." " Pajamas?" " Flannel, with feet." "Pajamas." "Excellent choice." "What else?" "In the elevator of the Bradbury Building a man touched a woman's bare skin by accident but it made her turn and look at him in such a way..." "And they...?" "Yes." "It was a good day." "Do you ever wonder what that would be like?" "Touch?" "No." "Yes, you do." "Occasionally." "Yes." "Touch." "I'm not asking for it every night." "Just twice a week." "Blue eyes." "He's never going to leave her." "20 minutes. 20 minutes." "Everything in this damn city is 20 minutes." "It's never 20 minutes." "My ass on a stool all day." "She always gets the good chair." "Six pounds, four ounces." "My daughter has a daughter." "$ 20,000 at 21 percent." "Pay it off with another card at 14 percent." "Ah, shit!" "Federal 595 heavy, slow immediately to match preceding aircraft." "Over." "Jesus, wake up!" "Wake up!" "The little girl asked me if she could be an angel." "They all want wings." "I never know what to say." "Tell them the truth." "Angels aren't human." "We were never human." "What if I just make her a little pair of wings out of paper?" "Tell her the truth." "I told her." "How did she take it?" "She said, "What good would wings be if you couldn't feel wind on your face?"" "On the 101 through downtown L.A., no delays..." "Shit!" "Jesus!" "What do we got?" "50-year-old had a huge anterior wall MI this morning." "Collapsed while jogging." "Paramedics resuscitated him, but his EKG's pretty ugly." "He's hypertensive." "This diagonal looks tight." "Who cathed him?" "Rosenberg." " Be right in." " The patient wants to meet you." "He's pretty out of it." "The doctor's here." "We're just going to cool to 32 today." "Sucker." "Jimi." "Vein." "Kid started walking." "Three unassisted steps." " Get it on video?" " I wasn't even there." "You failed as a father already." "How does that feel?" "Retrograde on." "Come down to half flow, give me a little volume." "Down to half flow, here's your volume." " Ready to come off?" " Ready." "Let's come off." "We're coming down." "We're clamped and off bypass." "Oh, shit." "What are you missing?" "Sponge." "Bummer." "Got it!" "Thank you, everybody." "Presbyterian's on line 2." "His rhythm will be irritable." " She's getting good, huh?" " Yeah, she's getting that attitude too." "Getting an attitude?" "Shit!" "V-tac!" "Christ!" "Paddles!" "Kill the music." "Get her back." " Charge to 2." " Charging 200." "Dr. Rice." "Clear!" " No pressure." " You give him lidocaine?" "100's gone in." "Buzz him again at 300." " Still nothing." " Start compression." "Kill the alarm!" "Hold up." "It's not working." "Got to open him." "How long to go back on?" "It'll take me 10 minutes." "Come on!" "Nothing." "Knife." "Internal paddles." "Charge to 20." "Ready." "Hit it." "Go to 30." "Hit it." "No response." "Tom, I got to get back on bypass here." "Almost there." "Give me 7 more minutes." "Come on." "Don't do this." "He's going." "He's not going anywhere." "Come on, don't do this!" "Damn it, come on!" "Tom!" "Come on!" "Mrs. Balford?" "Where's the doctor?" " I'm the doctor." " I'm sorry." "I operated on your husband." "How is he?" "He didn't survive." "What?" "We were able to restore blood flow to the heart but he developed a lethal arrhythmia and we couldn't resuscitate him." "Wait." "I'm sorry, I don't understand." "A what?" "I'm sorry." "Excuse me." "I'm sorry." "What did you say?" "What?" "Oh, my God!" "On the table, on my table." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "What happened?" "What happened?" "A graft occlusion?" "What?" "It was textbook." "It was textbook." "I'm so sorry." "The room got so big." "I was so small." "How did I get so small?" "I should've gone back on." "I should've massaged longer." "I should've gone back on." "Massaged longer." "I lost it." "I lost it." "Have you ever been seen, Cassiel?" "You're looking at me." "No, not by me, and not by the dying or the delirious." "Have you ever been seen like you were a man?" "In a diner once, a blind woman turned to me all of a sudden and asked me to pass her the mustard." " But she was blind." " But she knew I was there." "That doctor in the operating room she looked right at me." "She didn't see you, Seth." "She can't see you." "No one can see you unless you want them to." "And if I want her to?" "Why do you want her to?" "To help her." "Open it!" "Open it now!" "Everybody down!" "Do it!" "Do it!" "Shit!" "Just give him the money." "Did I leave the lights on?" "I left the lights on." "I should have gone to Ralphs." " Do it!" " Relax." "I'm doing it, okay?" "I never saw the Grand Canyon." "I'll never see my grandkids again." "What am I doing?" "Just be cool." "Be cool." "Be cool, man." "Be cool." "Holy shit!" "They don't need to see us." "You're early." "What's going on?" "Ferris was looking for you." "Don't I have a mitral valve to do?" "They canceled it." "Who canceled it?" "Sheffield." "Why are you telling me?" "He was busy." "He was chickenshit." " Maggie, you're sick." " I'm not sick." "You're sick." "You can't operate." "They've rescheduled for Monday." "An elective valve, no big deal." "It is unprofessional, and it embarrasses me in front of my staff." "I saw the chart on Balford." "I'm on the committee." "It's on review." " It wasn't your fault." " I know." "Then what's the problem?" "I don't know." "You put up a terrific fight." "We fight for people's lives, right?" "Don't you ever wonder who it is we're fighting with?" "So I'm crazy and chemically imbalanced." "You're tired." "You have moments." "Why didn't you call me?" "Because I never sleep when you stay over." "You never sleep whether I stay over or not." "You're good." "You know it." "Come back Monday and get back on the horse." "Doctor?" "I'll see you." ""As I walk along the stony shore of the pond in my shirtsleeves..."" ""..." "Amazon basin in the north, once an island sea..."" ""The highest truth on the subject remains unsaid probably cannot be said." "For all that we say is the far-off remembering of the intuition..."" ""...she begins to pull away from the awareness she had once..."" ""Commencing search." Searching my soul." "What happened to the cards?" "You could touch the cards." "She's been looking at me for half an hour." "Maybe if I just hang here..." ""This is a delicious evening, when the whole body's one sense..."" "What if I screamed?" "What if I just screamed right now?" ""When a woman decides to sleep with a man..."" ""You knew there would always be a spring as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen." "When the cold rains kept on and killed the spring it was as though a young person had died for no reason."" "All right, they have rescheduled the operation for Monday." "What happened yesterday?" "They had a golf tournament." "Who knows with these people?" "Good morning, Mr. Messinger." "The "G" is soft, like "messenger."" "What's on your lip?" "What?" "Am I slobbering here?" " Where did you get that?" " What am I, a prisoner?" "You want to get well, or you want Ben  Jerry's?" "This operation is a big deal." "Continue to eat like this and you might as well skip it." "Save the 30 grand." "If you'd have performed the operation yesterday like you were supposed to I'd be sucking carrots through a straw in my arm." "What happened?" "Circumstances were not optimal for the procedure." "I ain't "the procedure." My name is Nathan Messinger and I'm right here." "Hello, hello, hello..." "Floating, floating." "Don't pop it." "Don't pop it!" "Do you know the Muffin Man, the Muffin Man, the Muffin Man?" "Hi, Anne." "What are you doing here?" "I was on my way up to x-ray and I thought I'd stop in and just hide." "From what?" "I should've gone into pediatrics." "Oh, no." "Every guy you meet is either married or a gyno." "Never date a man who knows more about your vagina than you do." "Poor little guy." "He never stops crying." " What's wrong with him?" " No insurance." "Found him in a dumpster behind the House of Pies." "We worked him up the wazoo for everything from drug exposure to diabetes." "We got nothing." "May I?" "Did you do an ultrasound?" " You hear a murmur?" " Worth a shot." "Okay, baby." "So what are you hiding from?" "My patient's wife." "She wants me to tell her that her husband is going to be okay and that I have every confidence and I don't." "And after all this time, and after all this work I suddenly have this feeling that none of this is in my hands." "Nothing." "And if it isn't what do I do with that?" "Excuse me." "Are you a visitor?" "Yes." "Visiting hours have been over since 8:00." "Why do they have that?" "What?" "Hours." "Doesn't it help the patient to be visited?" "Who are you visiting?" "Mr. Messinger?" "Right now?" "You." "I don't need a visitor." "You're not ill?" "No." "I'm one of the doctors here." "Are you in despair?" "I lost a patient." "You did everything you could?" "I was holding his heart in my hand when he died." "Then he wasn't alone." "Yes, he was." "People die." "Not on my table." "People die when their bodies give out." "It's my job to keep their bodies from giving out." "Or what am I doing here?" "It wasn't your fault, Maggie." "I wanted him to live." "He is living." "Just not the way you think." "I don't believe in that." "Some things are true whether you believe in them or not." "How did you know my name?" "What's yours?" "Seth." "You better get out of here, Seth or security's going to think you're a psych patient." " Where are we?" " Down a liter." "Suction." "I am stuck on Band-Aid brand 'Cause Band-Aid's stuck on me" "No dying now, Mr. Messinger." "Not until you give me Seth 's phone number." "I am stuck on Band-Aid brand 'Cause Band-Aid's stuck on me" "Those eyes." "The way he looked right down into me." "Seth." "What kind of name is Seth?" "I thought you'd be here." "Salty." "My transplant tanked at 2 a.m." "You okay?" "You might want to return this." "That part about the spring?" ""You knew there'd always be a spring."" "How did you know that...?" "What?" "I didn't give you this book." "You didn't?" "Where'd you get it?" "Hi." "I'm a physician, and I think a patient left that in my office." " Can you tell me who checked it out?" " I can't tell you who." "I can tell you when." "All right, give me 5 minutes." "Hello, Maggie." "It's nice to see you again." "It's weird to see you again." "Weird is nice." "You like Hemingway?" "Yeah, I'm starting to." "May I?" ""As I ate the oysters with their strong taste of the sea and their faint metallic taste as I drank their cold liquid from each shell and washed it down with the crisp taste of the wine I lost the empty feeling and began to be happy."" "He never forgets to describe how things taste." "I like that." "Do you come here a lot?" "I live here." "What do you do?" "Read." "No, I mean, your work." "I'm a messenger." "What kind of messenger?" "A bike messenger?" "No, I'm a messenger of God." "Got a message for me?" "I already gave it to you." "Did you use my pager?" "I usually don't get my messages unless you beep me." "You've definitely been beeped." " How is Messinger?" " He's good." "The operation went really well." " It was a good day." " It was." "Yeah, I didn't kill anybody today." " You're an excellent doctor." " How do you know?" "I have a feeling." "That's pretty flimsy evidence." "Close your eyes." "It's just for a moment." "What am I doing?" "You're touching me." "Touch." "How do you know?" "Because I feel it." "You should trust that." "You don't trust it enough." " Let's go somewhere." " Where?" "I don't care." "What do you want to do?" "Anything." "What's that like?" "What's it taste like?" "Describe it." "Like Hemingway." "Well, it tastes like a pear." "You don't know what a pear tastes like?" "I don't know what a pear tastes like to you." "Sweet juicy." "Soft on your tongue." "Grainy like sugary sand that dissolves in your mouth." "How's that?" "It's perfect." "The first time I looked in a microscope, I knew I wanted to be a doctor." "Okay, let me have your hand." "What for?" "We'll take a look at your blood." "Not a possibility." "Men." "I suppose you know a woman's threshold of pain is 9 times higher than a man's." "Take a look at that." "That's bright." "That's me." "All those cells." "That's all you are." "That and all the space in between." "If this is all you are these cells then when they die, that's the end." "I don't know." "I think so." "How do you explain it?" "What?" "The enduring myth of Heaven." "I used to think that I had it all figured out." "But you didn't?" "No." "Because something happened in my O.R. and I got this jolt." "I got this feeling that there's something bigger out there." "Something bigger than me, bigger than you, and it..." "Does that sound crazy?" "No." "I couldn't fix him." "I did everything right and I couldn't fix him." "That's not supposed to happen." "And I..." "You cried." "Yeah." " Why do people cry?" " What do you mean?" "I mean, what happens physically?" "Tear ducts operate on a normal basis to lubricate and protect the eye." "When you have an emotion, they overact and create tears." "Why?" "Why do they overact?" "I don't know." "Maybe emotion becomes so intense your body just can't contain it." "Your mind and your feelings become too powerful." "Your body weeps." "I have to go." "I got to go." "Stay right here." "Don't go anywhere." "Stay right there." " Get the tube out." " He can't breathe." "It's because the tube is blocked." "How you feeling?" "Ready to hit the waves." "I'm afraid your bodysurfing days are over." "You got a mean tattoo going there." "What does your wife think of that?" "That is my wife." "Check his vitals every 15." "I can't see you, but I know you're there." "Go back and tell them that I'm not going." "Not yet." "Where have you been?" "Oh, shit." "I totally forgot dinner." "Dinner?" "With who?" "A guy I met." "I bumped into him and we got something to eat." "Did you pack my backpack?" "What else?" "We talked and then I got beeped and he disappeared." "Why did you pack my backpack?" "Earl, what are you doing?" "I thought we'd fly up to Tahoe, use your uncle's cabin maybe do a little hiking." "What?" "God." "Is it...?" "Maggie, it's just a tick." " Get a match." " We're not going to burn him, Jordan." "It'll have to back out." "Can't leave the head in." " We can't just be burning tick heads." " Then get some alcohol." "I don't have any." " You don't have any alcohol?" " I don't operate here." "How about some olive oil?" "Which kind?" "Jalapeño or rosemary?" "Rosemary." "So what did you and your friend..." "What did you say his name was?" "Seth." "What did you two talk about?" "Dying." "Come on, we deal with life and death every day." "Why can't we talk about it?" "I hope you won't become a surgeon who prays in the O.R." "Can we talk for a minute?" "We'll talk while camping." "Jordan, I can't go camping now." "We need some time together." "All right, let's see if we can just spend 5 minutes." "Let's see if we can just stand still together for 5 minutes." "Doing what?" "Just being here." "I'll get the trail map." "No, I mean it." "Nothing but us." "What do I do?" "Just look at me." "You can't do it." "You can't do it." " You flinched." "You lose!" " You cheat." "That old black magic called love." "Thank you very much." "Welcome back." "We've been talking to mothers who are members of the KKK." "You want to watch anything?" "Me neither." "How do you know when I'm here?" "I know." "Jeez, you look good." "I forgot how good everybody looked." "30 years of silence." "You got guts, kid, showing yourself like that." "I appreciate that." "I do." "It'll make it easier." "I got to tell you, I feel fine." "You might want to check your orders because I sure don't feel like I'm dying." "You're not dying." "Right." "Then how come you're hanging around my room all the time?" "I'm the only one with his ass hanging out of his dress." "Unless..." "Could it be the doctor?" "Sure." "The doctor." "She's pretty." "A little flat-chested but all you need's a handful." " Who are you?" " This is good." "This is what they call "serendipitous."" "Look that up in the dictionary, you'll see a picture of you and me." "Thank you." "You ready to deal?" "Because I can answer all your questions, friend." "How's the French toast?" "Fabulous." "Set me up." "Guess I should introduce myself." "Come on, give me your hand." "Put it in mine." "There you go." "A little tighter." "Tighter." "There you go." "No, that's too much." "There you go." "Good grip." "Nathaniel Messinger." "Glutton, hedonist former celestial body, recent addition to the human race." "I don't believe you." "You want proof?" "You hang out at a library." "You can speak every language." "You travel with the speed of thought and you're reading my mind right now." "Stop that." "You're doing it." "It's impossible." ""Some things are true whether you believe them or not."" "How?" " You choose." " Choose?" "To fall to Earth." "You take the plunge, the tumble, the dive." "You jump off a bridge." "Leap out a window." "You just make up your mind to do it and you do it." "You wake up all smelly, and aching from head to toe and hungrier than you've ever been only you have no idea what hunger is or any of that stuff so it's all real confusing and painful, but very, very good." "Human." "Listen, kid:" "He gave these bozos the greatest gift in the universe." "You think He didn't give it to us too?" "Which gift?" "Free will, brother." "Free will." "Couldn't get a job." "No past, no training." "No I.D." "Then one day, I was walking past a building site." "A skyscraper." "And I thought, "I could do that."" "You see, these people down here a lot of them are afraid of heights, you know what I'm saying?" "That makes me uniquely qualified." "And besides, it feels like a little bit of home up here." "And I like what I do." "I'm good at it." "These things'll kill you." "Are there others?" "Others like you?" "Yeah, they're out there." "You see them, but most of the time you just walk on by." "Nobody likes to think of the old life." "You know, what they gave up." "Then why'd you do it?" "My daughter, Ruth her stupid husband, Frank and my grandkids." "Petie's 4, Hannah's 6." "And this is my wife, Teresa." "Did you tell her who you were?" "I started to try once or twice." "Then I thought, "Why do that to her?"" "Do what?" "It's too much for them." "People don't believe in us anymore." "Do they still gather together at sunrise?" "And sunset, yes." "Take me there?" "Can you hear it?" "No." "I can't hear that!" "But you can't feel this!" "Nathan!" "You have to go back." "Not until I catch the big wave." "Wait." "Wait." "Wait for what?" "Swim!" "And then you just fall." " Fall?" " Dive." "You make up your mind to do it and you do it." "And when you wake up, you're...?" "Yes." "To smell the air." "Taste water." "Read a newspaper." "To lie." "Through your teeth." "To feed the dog." "Touch her hair." "What are you waiting for?" "There is so much beauty up here." "Yes." "Here you are again." "We'll release your friend Messinger tomorrow." "That's good." "His family's having a kind of a welcome-home party." "Will you be going?" "Will you be going?" "This is Earl." "He told me." "What else does he tell you?" "He worries that you never sleep." "And he loves to see you smile." "Sometimes I think Earl's the only one who understands me." "What about your boyfriend?" "Do you love him?" "Love?" "I don't know." "What does that mean?" "I was hoping you could tell me." "It's a word that describes a chemical react..." "It's just crap." "I'm full of crap." "I wait all day, just hoping for one more minute with you and I don't even know you." "What do you want to know?" "Why you wear the same clothes all the time." "Why won't you give me your phone number?" "Are you married?" "No." "Are you homeless?" "No." "Are you a drummer?" "Why don't you ever touch me?" "I don't want to hurt you." "You won't hurt me." "Did you feel that?" "If I could make you understand..." "I understand." "I'll see you around." "Hey, Doc!" "No, give me the whole package." "Come here." " Hi." " Thanks for coming." "You look great." "Is this heaven?" "Look at this." "Come on, let's meet some people." "You got an appetite?" "Have a beer, Seth." "Where you from?" "Up." "North." "Uh, Canada." "Listen." "Can you hear?" "I'm growing." "Smile, Hannah." "How long have you known Seth?" "Not very long." "But I feel like I've known him forever." "Honey, that hurts." "You're just like Grandpa." "Come on." "Let's see if the cookies are done." "Come on, Seth." " Can I help you?" " Yeah, great." "How did you two meet?" "He works with me over at the site." "Construction work." "I thought he was a messenger." "Yeah, he's one of those "hyphenates."" "I'll be right back." "Here, can you cut this up?" "So in what province in Canada were you born?" "I wasn't born in Canada." "What are your parents' names?" "No parents." "You have very delicate hands for a construction worker." "I'm not a construction worker." "Very pale hands." "Let me see." " Why did you do that?" " Let me see your hand." "No." "What's your last name?" "You know my last name." "I don't." "Plate." "Seth Plate?" "I cut you." "I cut you." "I cut you with that knife." "I felt it go in." "You felt it." "Not the way you do." "The way I do?" "What does that mean?" "You mean the way a doctor does?" "The way a woman does?" "What?" "The way a human does." "I have no sense of touch." "You feel that?" "Don't be frightened." "You freak!" "You liar!" "Who..." "What are you?" "I came to take Mr. Balford and I saw you." "I couldn't take my eyes off you." "How you fought for him." "And you looked right at me like I was a man." " "To take Mr. Balford"?" " I was there." " We're always there in every room." " What are you talking about?" "I was there in the stairwell when you cried for your patient." "And I touched you." "Remember?" "Why are you doing this?" "Because I'm in love with you." "I don't believe you." "Do you feel that?" "You don't want to believe me." "I cannot conceive of it!" "Just get out!" "Get out!" "Doctor?" "Doctor?" "Hello?" "Seth?" "Are you here?" "I want to see you." "Let me see you." "Just stay." "Just stay until I fall asleep." "Oh, yes!" "Thank you." "The baby can't sleep." "Has anyone ever seen the baby sleep?" "I don't know." "Let's check him out." "Choanal atresia." "There's hardly any air getting through." "How did you know?" "I just knew!" "Maggie?" "Yeah." "Are you alone?" "Yeah." "Pretty intuitive call on the baby." "Think so?" "I couldn't have done it better." "Well, that's a compliment." "What are you doing?" "I'm spending time with you." "Will you marry me?" "We can finally get up to Tahoe." "Get married on the Nevada side honeymoon and be back before we miss a case." "What do you want me to do?" "Get down on my knees?" "What do you want me to say?" "We belong together." "We're the same species." "I'm not very good at matters of the heart." "I mean the proverbial heart." "Please be my wife." "Just think about it." "Breathe in." "Breathe in." "I'm good." "I don't understand a God who would let us meet, if we could never be together." "He didn't tell you." "Tell me what?" "Maybe you should ask him." "No, I'm asking you." "Seth knows no fear no pain no hunger." "He hears music in the sunrise." "But he'd give it all up." "He loves you that much." "I don't understand." "He can fall." "He can give up his existence as he knows it." "He can give up eternity and become one of us." "It's up to you." "How do you know this?" "Because I did it." "Seth, I need to talk to you." "Seth, please." "Please be here." "God, help me through this." "You are so beautiful." "You'll always be that way." "Jordan asked me to go away with him and get married." "He knows me." "He knows the demands of my work." "You don't love him." "He and I are the same." "And I want that." "And I want somebody who can feel my hand when I touch him." "But you can feel me." "You felt me." "I want to say goodbye." "I don't want to see you again." "Hey, buddy." "You can't be in here." "Do you see me?" "Do you see me?" "Can you see me?" "We can see you." "Is this blood?" "This is blood!" "Is it red?" "Red?" "Is it red?" "Color." "What color were the drugs you took?" "Better get your butt out of here." "You got somewhere to go?" "Maggie." "Down and down and down I go" "Round and round and round I go" "Round and spin" "Loving the spin I'm in" "Loving that old black magic called love" "Love!" "Hi!" "I was wondering if you could tell me how to get to the county hospital?" "Can I help you, sir?" "I'll just take a moment to catch my breath." "Breath!" "Maggie Rice." "Are you a patient?" "No." "I just need to find her, please." "You'll have to call her office." "Someone there can help you." "Do you know where she is?" "No, sir, I do not know where she is." "You have this computer and all this technology." "Can't you look her up?" "Where's Maggie?" "So you're a friend of Maggie's?" "What happened to you?" "Sorry." "It's okay." "I fell." "Evidently." "Off a train?" "I fell in love." "Please help me find her." "She went to Lake Tahoe." "Her uncle has a cabin on the Nevada side." "Wait!" "Cassiel." "Are you there?" "Hello." "Where you headed?" "Tahoe!" "Reno!" "Tahoe!" "I'm going to Reno." "I'm going to Tahoe." "Hop in." "We'll figure it out when we get there." "Am I too late?" "Too late?" "Jordan?" "I couldn't marry Jordan." "I'm in love with you." "What happened?" "Free will." "I feel you." "Do you feel that?" "Yes." "And that?" "How's it feel?" "Tell me what it feels like." "I can't." "Try." "Warm." "Aching." "It's okay." "We fit together." "I know." "We were made to fit together." "I always asked the dying what they liked best about living." "Wrote it down in my book." "This is it." "This is what I like best." "You haven't even started yet." "We have our whole lives together." "You and me." "Mr. and Mrs. Plate." " I'll get help." " You're here." " Stay." " I should get help." "Don't go." "The driver went." "Please stay." "Please stay with me." "I'm scared." "I screwed up." "I wanted to show you everything." "You will." "You came all this way." "I'm sorry." "God, no, Maggie!" "To touch you and to feel you." "To be able to hold your hand right now." "You know what that means?" "Do you know how much I love you?" "Keep looking at me, okay?" "Look right in my eyes." "Someone's out there." "Don't look at them." "Please don't you look at them!" "Is this what happens?" "Yes." "This is what happens." "I'm not afraid." "When they ask me what I liked the best I'll tell them it was you." "God!" "I can't see you, but I know you're there." "I'm sorry." "Get out." "Was it you?" "Were you the one?" "Were you there?" "No." "Why did He do this?" "I don't know." "Because her number was up?" "What do you want me to say?" " Am I being punished?" " You know better than that." "That's life." "You're living now." "And one day you'll be dying." "What's it like?" "What?" "Warmth." "It's wonderful." "If you'd known this was going to happen would you have done it?" "I would rather have had one breath of her hair one kiss of her mouth one touch of her hand than an eternity without it." "One."