"Previously on rescue me..." "Let me help you." "I can make" "A better life for the both" "Of us." "OK, we could, um... we could buy a place on the" "Beach, OK?" "Or we can spend the" "Next 30 years just watching" "All the kids" "Grow up and get married, and" "Their grandkids play in the" "Ocean and in the sand." "I left him alone for like" "Two minutes with a couple of" "The guys, and he slipped away." "He said you guys were making" "Fun of him." "That you called him" "A retard." "Nobody called him a retard." "That's ridiculous." "I'm not" "Saying that he's a liar," "All right." "He's probably just" "Confused is all." "I think you should go." "I had an epiphany, Tom." "I'm turning over a new leaf." "A new leaf?" "I got closure." "Here's my transfer form," "Chief." "I want out." "From what I hear, you're" "Already out." "If I hadn't snooped, then I" "Wouldn't have found out what" "Damien's been doing." "What's he been doing?" "Holy shit." "Roofies and viagra." "You can't let anyone at my" "Job know about this." "I got it." "First of all, it's against" "The rules obviously." "Second of" "All, I'm an illegal." "You want to get married in" "A bar room, or the back of" "A taxi, or a friggin' rest stop," "That's fine." "Just tell me where," "And I'll meet you, OK?" "God..." "I knew you'd come around." "Janet's pregnant." "It wasn't planned." "It just" "Happened." "I want this." "Whether it's" "His or yours." "I want this" "Child to replace what we lost." "We're out, we're out." "There you go, there you go." "Watch it." "There you go." "OK." "You're good." "You know, it's a mask, man." "Not a spittoon." "Jesus." "Anybody" "Got a rag?" "You guys gotta get back up" "To five." "Probe and Garrity were going" "Up to five." "No, they're gonna need a" "Hand." "I just spoke with the" "Super." "The front of the" "Apartment is vacant." "There's" "A guy living in the back." "It's" "Gonna be tough getting him out." "Fat guy?" "Just the opposite." "Really?" "Hey, guys." "Hello." "Garrity!" "Are we in the right place?" "This is where they said," "Right?" "Holy shit." "Hey, guys." "This is amazing," "Right?" "Hey, are you OK, son?" "Wait a minute." "Give him a" "Second." "He can't talk." "He's got" "The tubie thing in his throat." "He types the words into the" "Computer and it reads the words" "For him and says the sentences" "For him." "Get me out of here." "That chair looks kind of" "Heavy." "Give me" "A hand here, probie." "It's not gonna work, guys." "Oh... it's gonna take all 5 of us." "Guys, I'm telling you." "It's" "Not gonna work." "There's water" "Damage on the stairs between" "The third and fourth floors." "All the weight plus the weight" "Of this thing, the whole thing" "Will collapse underneath us." "Wait a second." "He's trying" "To say something." "Will you assholes" "Stop talking and get me out" "Of here." "How do you" "Usually get... he's not deaf." "He's just in" "A wheelchair." "Oh." "How do you usually get... down the, uh... guys, from now on, probably" "Yes or no answers." "Why don't we just take him" "Out of the wheelchair, guys?" "That's what I'm saying." "I'll die," "You dumb shit." "Franco, take out the window." "Bring the bucket up." "You two" "Come with me." "Find something we" "Can use for a ramp." "He can't" "Sleep in that chair, for" "Christ's sake." "You all right?" "I just shit myself." "Sorry to hear about that." "It's OK." "That's how I always" "Do it." "* on another day," "Come on, come on," "With these ropes I tied," "Can we do no wrong?" "Now we grieve" "'Cause now is gone," "Things were good" "When we were young," "With my teeth locked down" "I can see the blood" "Of a thousand men" "Who have come and gone," "Now we grieve" "'Cause now is gone," "Things were good" "When we were young," "Is it safe to say?" "Come on, come on," "Was it right to leave?" "Come on, come on," "Will I ever learn?" "Come on, come on," "Come on, come on," "Come on, come on *" "Pretty much, you're an" "Idiot." "How?" "How am I an idiot?" "How are you an idiot?" "Well, ask anyone." "Blueberry" "Pie counts as a fruit." "OK." "Blueberry pie is not" "A fruit, OK?" "Do you get it off" "Of bushes?" "Do you pluck it off" "Trees, huh?" "Do you walk out to" "The field and harvest blueberry" "Pie?" "No." "Oh, but Tom, what a wonderful" "World if you could." "OK, you know what?" "What's in" "Blueberry pie?" "Blueberries," "True or false?" "Yeah, amongst other things." "OK." "So it's a fruit." "Get in the truck." "Oh, mother of God!" "Get me" "Off the fence." "Sweet baby Jesus" "Who I worship in the dark, come" "And get me off the fence please," "Lord!" "Calm down, lady." "You moving" "Around ain't gonna do any good" "At all." "What's your name, honey?" "Oprah." "Really?" "Hey, how's the book club" "Going there, oprah?" "Oh, shut your face." "You think" "There's only one?" "Oprah's a" "Common name." "You don't got to tell us." "You're our third one today." "What do you think, sawz-All?" "Nah, too much vibration." "Partner saw" "Is the way to go." "What you talking about" "A saw." "Ain't nobody sawing" "Nothing here." "Franco grab the partner saw." "Make sure you get the right" "One, huh?" "Aluminum oxide blade." "Got it." "Stop talking about a saw." "Come down and help me!" "Oh, Jesus." "You're gonna have to calm" "Down now, OK, hon?" "Don't tell me to calm down." "I'm standing here bleeding," "Stuck like a pig, and you're" "Telling me to calm down." "I'll get off this fence, and" "I'll take your calm down and" "Shove it up your stupid white" "Ass." "Well, that was very" "Un-Oprah like." "OK, we're gonna cut it" "Here, down here, same thing" "On this side." "That'll give the" "Hospital plenty to work with." "Ain't nobody cutting nothing." "Get away from me, cracker." "Here we go." "The saw's coming." "Just relax." "Oh!" "Oh... grab her!" "Grab her!" "My God." "It's like iwo jima" "All over again." "You got her?" "Yeah, yeah." "What happened?" "I burned my eggs." "I was gone, what, 15 minutes?" "You almost burned the" "Goddamn house down?" "I told you" "I was gonna make your goddamn" "Eggs for you." "It was only part of the" "Kitchen." "Is there a fire there" "Now?" "No." "Well, I put it out." "I'm not" "Completely helpless, you know?" "Can you keep it down, I'm" "Trying to read." "You know what?" "We gotta talk." "This ain't" "Working out." "You know?" "What if you hadn't put it" "Out?" "What if you had burned" "The whole goddamn building down?" "Huh?" "Huh?" "What then?" "What if you fall down and I'm" "Not here, Sheila's not here," "Lou's not here?" "I mean, we got" "To start thinking of other" "Options, OK?" "Now you hear this, boy-O." "Because I'm only saying it" "Once." "You talk about putting me" "In some goddamn home ever again," "And the next fire I start... will take out me, this whole" "Apartment and quite possibly" "You, too." "Oh, yeah?" "Yeah. 37 years on the job." "And you don't think I can't" "Do it." "Hey, what are you doing?" "Oh, you know." "You want to go grab like a" "Brew or something?" "Uh, Maggie's coming over." "We were gonna take a walk." "Get" "A bite to eat." "You wanna come?" "Uh, no." "That's cool." "I mean," "You guys don't want me" "Hanging around." "I mean, besides," "I like Maggie and everything," "But she makes me kind of, like," "Nervous." "Really, nervous, how?" "Like if she looks at me too" "Long, I might cry." "Yeah." "I get that, too." "Except" "For me, it's a little more hot" "Than it is scary." "Hey, uh, guys." "I need a" "Little input here." "This is" "Gonna sound kind of strange, but" "I think I'm getting submarined" "By a retard." "One of you guys buy a sub?" "No, no, no." "I'm not talking" "About them." "I'm talking about" "Natalie's brother." "Richie." "Hey, but how neat would it" "Be to have your own sub?" "Yeah, totally, dude." "That would be sick." "I know that he's retarded," "But I swear he's playing me," "Lou, you know?" "I mean, sometimes" "I catch him with, like, this" "Smile on his face, you know?" "It's kind of like he's trying" "To sabotage what I got going" "On with his sister or something." "I buy it." "Yeah?" "Oh, yeah." "They're crafty" "People, the retards." "I mean," "Case in point, the special" "Olympics." "They call their" "Olympics special." "What does" "That make our olympics?" "Not" "Special." "Ordinary." "Run of" "The mill." "And what about their" "Needs?" "They're special, too." "What about my needs?" "Hey, I" "Know my needs, gentlemen." "And a couple of them are pretty" "Goddamn special." "Not to mention" "Perverse." "Yeah, so what's his game?" "Well, it's pretty obvious." "Oh, this will be good." "He probably feels threatened." "You know, I mean, he sees you" "And his sister getting close," "And he's afraid that he might" "Lose her to you." "You know, and" "Who's to say he'd be along for" "The ride if that happened?" "He's scared." "Frightened." "I'd be" "Worried about the same thing if" "I were him." "Holy shit, mikey, I think" "You might, uh, I hate to say" "It, be absolutely goddamn" "Right there." "Lou?" "What can I say, he speaks" "Retard, we don't." "We gotta find a place to" "Eat." "I'm starving." "All I had" "Was a pop tart and two olives" "All day." "Oh, that's a good diet." "It's healthy." "Hey, this is nice" "Though, right, just walking out" "In the fresh air?" "Doing a little" "Window shopping?" "My mom and dad," "They used to do this when they" "Were courting." "They'd just walk" "And window shop." "Did you just say courting?" "Yeah." "Christ, what is this, little" "House on the goddamn prairie?" "Hello, that's what they used" "To do back then." "Yeah, and they got" "Diphtheria." "Oh, Jesus look." "Wow, that's" "Gonna be me someday soon." "You're gonna get a job as" "A mannequin?" "You're not marrying" "Me in a monkey suit, Sean." "No way." "I'm starting to feel like" "We're really not on the same" "Page here." "No, I don't think we're in" "The same book." "OK, well, look." "I'll do it" "However you want, OK?" "What's" "Important to me is that we are" "Just standing there, taking our" "Vows in the eyes of God." "All right?" "Where in the eyes of God?" "What do you think, Maggie," "In a church, all right, in his" "House." "Can't he come to our house?" "Maggie, please, will you do" "This for me and for my folks?" "I'm no good in churches," "Sean, they creep me out." "All those statues looking down" "At me, judging, knowing all the" "Dirty, promiscuous, unprotected" "Sex I've had." "Whoa, whoa, OK." "You know" "What, that's a lot, but why" "Don't you, just how much" "Unprotected... don't ask, and definitely," "We're not getting married in" "The church, Sean, no way." "I can't do it." "It's not just about my" "Folks, Maggie." "It's about me," "Too, you know." "I mean, the world" "That we live in and the job that" "I had and how we are together." "Listen to me..." "I love you, OK?" "I love you in" "Letters 8 miles high." "But you," "You gotta do this for me." "I'm telling you, it's a deal" "Breaker." "OK, fine." "So we'll get" "Hitched in the church." "Big deal." "All right, I'll call the" "Priest." "Mmm mmm." "Holy cats." "A terrific meal, prepared by" "A beautiful woman." "I may as well" "Just take a gun to my head." "'Cause it does not get any" "Better than this." "That's a terrible thing" "To say." "Besides, we are just" "Getting to the best part of" "The evening." "Aren't we?" "Jerry?" "The best part?" "Look, karlene... look, you're a terrific woman," "You know?" "But I just, I need" "A little, uh..." "I don't know" "If I'm ready for this yet." "You look more than ready." "Well, I am, I am, b-B-But" "Not tonight." "I know you're" "Gonna think I'm crazy, and I'm" "Sure I'm gonna be kicking myself" "In the ass as soon as you walk" "Out that door, but..." "I need to just take some time" "Here." "I'll be ready for you" "Soon." "You know, for a man" "Looks like a garden gnome," "You got a lot of demands." "I suppose I better leave now." "So you can start kicking" "Yourself." "I'll be waiting." "Oh... uh... sorry." "A friend of Lou's." "I'll just," "I'll be a minute." "OK." "Hey." "Nice." "Yeah, she's cute, huh?" "Yeah." "How was she?" "Oh, come on now." "Nice guys" "Don't tell." "Get out of here," "Punk." "You're ruining my" "Afterglow." "All right." "Good night." "Sorry... about that." "Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah." "Right." "OK." "OK." "See you." "Bye." "Get out of the bed, whore." "What?" "Get up." "What's the matter?" "Tell me I didn't just" "Witness what I think I just" "Witnessed." "What did you witness?" "She's not really a nun," "Right?" "She's wearing, like, a" "A nun costume, like her French" "Maid costume was at the dry" "Cleaners or something, right?" "OK... um... your confusion is expected as" "Was this conversation." "What the mind sees is sometimes" "Not that which is real, but" "Rather the reality which is" "Brought to it." "Really?" "I'm brushing up on buddhism." "The buddhist approach to" "Thought and deed." "Ask yourself" "This, Tom." "If a tree falls in" "A forest, and there's no one" "There to see it or hear it," "Would you still be such an" "Asshole?" "Actually, you might" "Have done me a favor there by" "Discarding one of my" "Possessions." "That's part of the" "Path to enlightenment." "OK, my foot is about to take" "The enlightened path up your" "Ass." "Is she a nun, or is she" "Not a nun?" "She's a seml-Nun." "She's a seml-Nun." "What does" "That mean?" "She's in the nun" "National guard?" "Huh?" "She's the bride of Christ one" "Weekend a month, what the hell" "Does that mean?" "Why don't you sit down and" "Calm yourself, and I'll make" "Us some green tea and we will" "Talk." "I'm not sitting with you" "And doing anything, OK?" "You" "Have crossed a boundary," "My friend." "Oh, you have boundaries?" "I have one boundary, Lou." "One boundary and one boundary" "Only." "No sex with nuns in the" "Place where I live." "Her name is teresa azzurro." "Teresa azzurro." "Na na na na." "I met her at the market" "Last week." "Jeans, t-Shirt," "Leather boots." "The body, you" "Just got a glimpse of." "We talk." "I tell her what I do." "She tells" "Me she's a nun." "She's a nun" "Until the end of the month, OK?" "She's leaving the order." "They" "Know all about it." "She's trying" "To spend a few days every week" "Outside of the convent trying" "To adjust." "Adjust what, her vagina?" "For a couple more weeks," "She's living under their roof." "She has to abide by their" "Rules, and then she's out." "This could be really big for" "Me, Tom." "I'm sure it is." "It's a nun." "What's bigger than a nun?" "A saint?" "Oh, you know, Tom." "I mean," "You know, I got a chance here." "She's only been with two other" "Guys." "One was some clown way" "Back in high school, and the" "Other is, you know, Jesus." "Yeah, Jesus." "Our lord and" "Savior who died for our sins." "That Jesus, right?" "Yeah, well, the word on the" "Street is, I was created in" "His image, you know." "And there" "Are those people who say I, too," "Move in mysterious ways." "Uh-Huh, OK, and she's" "Technically still married to" "Him." "So that means she's" "Cheating on the son of God" "With you." "I got a hundred pounds on" "The guy, and look, no holes" "In my hands." "Bring it on, Jesus." "OK, you just crossed the" "Second boundary." "Get away" "From me." "Get away from me." "What?" "I need to lie down." "You all right?" "What's that smell?" "What smell?" "It's either the kitchen," "Or I think you might have" "Actually burned a hole in" "My soul." "Oh, yeah, that's it." "Oh, yeah." "Right through the" "Middle of the soul." "Yeah." "Hi, it's me." "Are you almost done with" "Your shift?" "Well, I got stuck on a" "Call." "Why, what's up?" "He's gone." "I said that I" "Was gonna come back here and" "Check up on him, make him" "Dinner, and he just took off." "Who, Damien?" "No, not Damien." "Your dad." "He's gone." "Where could he go?" "He's 83" "Years old." "It takes him 20" "Minutes to walk to the toilet." "From the tub." "He left you a note." "What's it say?" "Did you try and burn down" "The kitchen?" "What?" "That's what the" "Note says?" "No." "I'm just asking you." "Read the note." "It's just the same old shit." "It says that he's ashamed of" "You, you're a terrible son," "And that you couldn't give him" "A male heir, blah blah blah." "That's all it says?" "No, he also said that he was" "Gonna kill himself." "Whose rosary" "Beads are these?" "What?" "I found these rosary beads" "Behind the door in the bathroom." "Whose are they?" "Um... those are Lou's." "Lou's a catholic?" "I didn't know he was into that." "Actually, he just got into it" "The other night." "What else does" "The note say?" "Say where he's" "Gonna kill himself?" "When?" "No." "Of course not." "Old people." "They've got to be" "So mysterious." "Look, you better" "Start going out and trying to" "Find him, and I'll just stick" "Around here and see if he shows" "Up, OK?" "All right." "Thanks." "Aah!" "Hey." "Hey." "You got problems, pal." "Nah, it's just an ingrown" "Nail." "I'm serious." "People around" "Here feel like you're getting" "A free ride." "You know, 'cause" "You're already somewhat of" "A hero around here based on what" "You did." "Now you're getting" "Free sex." "We gotta make it" "Look good." "How?" "You gotta get a job." "Shit!" "A job and a wife." "It's getting to be just like on" "The outside." "What can I tell you," "Life sucks." "Even when you might" "Be doing life." "That's funny." "That ain't funny." "It's funny." "You know, I appreciate you" "Coming with me because I know" "It's probably speed dating" "Night at the convent or" "Something." "That's very, very, very" "Comical." "Wait a minute." "Is that him?" "That's an old lady, for" "Christ's sake." "God, that is one ugly old" "Lady." "Hey, I was thinking about the" "Three of us, you know, having" "Dinner." "The three of us?" "I hope you're talking about" "The old lady and us because" "I know you're not talking to" "Me about the nun because you've" "Already gotten me so many" "Minus points on the get to" "Heaven roster." "No, I am talking about the" "Nun, Tom, all right." "Her name" "Is teresa, OK?" "She happens to" "Be an amazing woman." "She happens" "To be very smart." "She happens" "To be very brave, too." "A brave nun?" "Oh, that's" "Great." "I mean, making that kind of" "A life change after what she's" "Been through, you know?" "She's got me thinking about," "You know, my own changes." "The whole fishing boat thing." "Again with the boat?" "Yeah." "Again with the boat." "You know, my cousin just called" "Me." "He's bringing it up from" "Florida next week." "Going out" "To montauk, meeting him." "He's" "Gonna take me out for the" "Day, show me the ropes." "Sun in" "My face, wind in my hair." "It's" "Gonna be nice." "Look, you want the boat?" "Get on the boat try the boat." "I hope you like the boat." "But" "Just stop talking about it." "Boat this, boat this." "The boat," "The boat, the boat." "I'm sick of" "The goddamn boat." "OK." "You're supposed to be helping" "Me look for my old man, OK?" "Let's, let's go over to mcphees." "He used to drink there." "Let's" "See if he went back." "Mcphees is gone, Tom." "It's" "A korean nail salon now." "You're shitting me." "No, I'm not shitting you." "I mean, those places are like" "Ragweed." "Christ." "You go to the" "Movies, you get up to go take" "A piss, you come back, korean" "Nail salon." "Yeah." "Yeah, let's go over" "The list one more time, OK?" "Yeah." "Piper's den." "Nail salon." "Uh, molly noonan's." "Too far." "Irish mahoney's." "Too crowded." "Scratcher?" "It's all black now." "The corkscrew." "Gay bar." "OK, what about the galway" "Gael?" "Gay nail salon." "Jeez, they've got their own" "Nail salons now." "They do very well." "You know, Tom, I've got to" "Be honest with you." "Yeah." "Part of me, you know, is kind" "Of glad my parents passed" "When they did." "Saves me from" "Having to watch them grow old," "You know, fall apart." "I'm a selfish prick, aren't I?" "I know where he is." "* but the sea is wide" "And I can't cross over" "And I have wings to fly" "Build me a boat... *" "Build me a boat." "What the hell" "Am I gonna do with a goddamn" "Boat?" "Teary-Eyed, pissant song." "I hate it." "But she loved it." "Well, Martha." "Here we are." "Should be the other way around," "Huh?" "Hey." "Yeah." "What's going on?" "Say hello to your mother." "Say hello to your mother!" "OK." "Hey, ma." "She never liked that being" "Said to her." "Yeah, she said it sounded" "Like sheep." "She was the best woman I" "Ever knew." "The best years of my life were" "Spent with her." "What are you talking about?" "The two of you fought like two" "Wet cats in a bag." "Well, the day to day was" "Rough, I admit." "But the years... were wonderful." "Come on." "Don't patronize me." "I'm not... patronizing." "I know why you want me out." "I know why you want to put me" "In some home." "I never said I was gonna... it's not because I'm some" "Old, ancient bastard." "It's because... this is what's" "Waiting for you." "This is your" "Future." "You were a bright lad." "Maybe not bright, but popular." "I thought you were gonna kick" "Life's ass." "Now look at you now." "You got nothing." "There's not" "That much time, Tommy." "God, so little time." "You know... this is what you're gonna be." "Drunk in some graveyard." "Crying like an old lady." "Come on." "Let's go home." "I'm not gonna... no, no, no." "Put you in a nursing home." "We'll figure something else out." "All right?" "Leave these, leave these." "Those were her favorites." "She may want to listen." "Come on." "Put that down." "Let's go." "Come on." "You're always touching me." "Now cut it out." "I'm trying to help you." "I don't need your help." "Careful." "Don't let me fall." "Hold on to me." "Do you want me to touch you" "Or not?" "I'll tell you when to touch" "Me and when not to touch me." "Now get your hands off me." "Come here." "Hold on to me," "For Christ's sake." "Jesus Christ." "I want my sundae." "Yeah, yeah." "It's on its way," "Rich." "So, uh..." "I, uh, I thought we should" "Get together, you know, the" "Two of us and talk over some" "Stuff." "Like what?" "Well, uh, like how I think" "Your sister's real great." "And" "I care about her." "And I wouldn't" "Want anything or anyone to mess" "Up what we got going." "I want my sundae." "Yeah." "They're making it," "All right, Richie?" "Promise." "Nigger." "Uh, he didn't mean anything" "By that, sir." "He's got a little" "Tourette's thing, that's all." "Yeah, I got a tourette's" "Thing, too." "I keep it loaded" "In my glove compartment." "Sorry." "Look, Richard." "I know" "What you're doing, OK?" "You're playing a game." "Now look," "I don't blame you, all right?" "It's worked before, why" "Shouldn't it work now?" "Your" "Sister gets serious about some" "Guy, you see the balance of" "Power starting to shift." "You" "Kick the retard thing into" "High gear, and the guy in" "Question beats feet." "Well, look," "You can cut that shit right now." "Because you and me, this ain't" "About power, Richie." "It's about" "Both of us loving Natalie," "All right?" "It's about both of" "Us being man enough to share" "Her without, you know, acting" "Like a couple of retards." "I think we got some stuff" "In common." "Like what?" "We're both smarter than" "We look." "Yeah, well, could be." "So, uh, if it's OK, I wanted" "To ask your permission to" "Continue seeing your sister." "You know, because, I really" "Dig her, Richard, I do." "And I want to spend more time" "With her." "And you." "Nobody ever asked me for my" "Permission before." "For anything." "So you gonna pull back on" "The retard shit?" "Deal." "All right." "My man." "There you go." "I asked for nuts." "Could we get some nuts over" "Here, please?" "My brother asked" "For nuts." "Could we get some" "Goddamn nuts over her?" "You're crazy." "Maggie, hey, don't." "Don't do that." "What?" "I'm having a nicotine" "Fit." "I walk inside any holy" "Building and my body chemistry" "Goes completely ape shit." "Don't swear in here." "Ape shit is not a swear word." "It's a zoological term." "Good evening." "Hi." "I'm father Daniel chaffe." "Call me father dan." "Hope I" "Haven't kept you waiting" "Too long." "No, no." "Not at all, sir." "Yeah, 20 minutes." "But, like," "Who's counting?" "OK, so, Sean and Maggie." "Congratulations on undertaking" "The holy sacrament of marriage." "Let's be sure we got all your" "Information." "I assume your" "Given name is Margaret?" "Gavin." "What?" "You said given name, it's" "Gavin." "I was asking about her name" "At birth." "Oh, right, sorry." "Just" "Trying to help." "Is it Margaret?" "Uh, no." "Uh, then what is it?" "It's none of your beeswax." "Maggie, hello, could you..." "OK, fine." "Can't he look it up?" "I'm sorry." "Peggy sue." "What?" "Peggy sue?" "Your father was a buddy" "Holly fan?" "Did he name me buddy?" "Is this a first marriage in" "The church for both of you?" "For me, yes, it is." "And it is for me, too, well," "Not counting the three stinkers" "I have under my belt, but they" "Weren't in the church." "First time, I got married by" "A monk." "Second time by a" "Priestess, and third time by" "Some guy in a cape on a beach" "And one of us was naked." "Can I smoke in here?" "Maggie, Maggie, don't," "Maggie." "He works around burning" "Incense all day." "What's a little" "Bit more smoke gonna do to him," "Right, Sean?" "Right, Danny?" "There's no smoking in here." "Fine." "Got it." "He's probably gonna smoke" "That when we leave." "Could you cut it out, please?" "Jesus." "Sorry." "The two of you haven't come" "Here on a dare, have you?" "No, no." "Seriously, father." "Please forgive my fiancee." "She's having some issues with" "The church." "And, um, we're" "Working them out." "In counseling." "Uh, yes, marriage, catholic" "Issue counseling." "It's really" "Very helpful." "I see." "And where are you receiving" "This counseling?" "Murphy's pub on 48th." "Maggie, could you..." "I think we're done here." "Should you actually find a" "Church that's willing to" "Marry you, I want to wish you" "Both the best of luck." "How dare you walk out on us," "You sanctimonious tool." "You have no idea how important" "This is to him." "I assisted during an exorcism" "In a small village outside" "Nairobi in 1977." "Or did we meet" "Somewhere else?" "5 bucks says we made the" "Front page of the bulletin." "Jeez." "Hey, Tom." "Hey, Chief." "Sorry I'm late." "Oh, no, that's all right." "Look, I just wanted to catch" "You before you went into" "The back." "It's kind of on a" "Personal matter, you know?" "What?" "Well, I, uh, I don't know" "Where to start." "I started seeing" "This woman, and we hit it off," "You know?" "Right?" "And she wanted to have some" "Fun the other night, and I had" "To back off, you know?" "Why, I thought, didn't you" "And rose kind of... yeah, that's different," "You know?" "Different how?" "Well, rose is almost my age," "And she's white, and this girl" "Is black, and near 40," "And she's hot and big, and I" "Mean, I like it, but, uh, I'm" "A little scared, you know?" "Scared." "Yeah, I mean, like, you know," "Tapping Mary tyler Moore's one" "Thing, but eartha kitt's another" "Whole story, you know?" "Jesus, Mary tyler Moore and" "Eartha kitt." "I'd need a" "Blindfold, 4 viagra and a" "Strap on to do either" "One of them." "I'll check into it." "OK." "Sooner the better." "All right." "Thanks." "OK, fellas." "I think I can" "Take it from there." "Hey, am I glad to see you, baby." "You know they want me to work" "Now?" "I gotta take a goddamn job." "Can you believe this shit?" "Hey, I've been behaving like" "A choir boy." "I've been cleaning" "My cell." "Been nice to the" "Guards." "I even brokered a peace" "Pact between the gay aryan" "Alliance and the goddamn" "Straight aryan alliance." "I mean, that alone took me 2" "Goddamn weeks." "I'm like" "Kissinger in here." "Oh... baby?" "Sweetheart?" "What?" "You know, how come you never" "Ask me about my day?" "Well, I mean, if, potential" "House, this one here is pretty" "Cool." "A tiki bar?" "That's enough" "To make me start drinking again." "So that would be my number one" "Pick." "And number two, I'd... number two, and number three." "You know what, let's just take" "These three and put them into" "A big what if Stack, OK?" "Gosh." "What?" "We totally picked" "The same order." "You're shitting me, really?" "All three?" "Mm-Hmm." "Well, I mean, Jimmy and I" "Always did kind of have the same" "Taste in almost everything." "Cars, clothes... so anyway, what did you want" "To ask me?" "Um, right." "All right." "Yeah." "This is gonna sound a little" "Strange." "What?" "And you're gonna want to" "Scream your head off." "What?" "But please resist." "What?" "The urge to, stop saying" "What, OK?" "I might need you to" "Rummage around in Damien's room" "And find one or two tablets of" "Viagra." "Hmm?" "Viagra." "I need some viagra." "... OK." "It's not for me." "OK." "I'm serious." "It's for the" "Chief." "He's got a new" "Girlfriend." "He's afraid about" "Performing." "OK." "Just stop saying OK." "I have things to say." "It's not for me." "OK, I'm not" "Sleeping with anyone else, or" "You right now, OK." "So it's" "Really for the Chief, OK?" "It's" "For him, OK?" "You've got me" "Saying it." "You know what... just call me later, and if I" "Happen to find some, then you" "Can just come by after work" "And pick it up." "OK?" "Ow!" "OK." "Sexiest girl in the world." "Thank you." "You know, she could save your" "Life." "What's left of it." "Yep." "Hey, stopped by my uncle" "Red's house before I got" "To work today." "Get up there and" "Hear moaning and groaning" "Coming from inside." "Ah, ah, ah, I don't want" "To hear it." "I let myself in, I found him" "Lying naked in the bottom of" "The tub." "That's better than what I" "Thought you were going" "To tell me, OK?" "Should've seen him." "One long," "Ugly wrinkle with four teeth." "He slipped in the shower last" "Night." "Spends the whole" "Goddamn night lying flat on" "His back in the bottom of the" "Tub." "He's got an imprint of" "The drain on his scalp." "You know what that's payback" "For?" "What?" "Your little nun thing." "Oh, yeah, anyway." "He had a" "Date last night. 78 years old." "Came home, decided he wanted to" "Wash the stank off him." "His" "Words not mine." "How much did he pay for" "The date?" "25 bucks." "That was a rhetorical" "Question." "Anyway, I'm yanking his" "Skinny little Irish ass out of" "The tub this morning, and I'm" "Suddenly struck by the image" "Of killing two birds, two very" "Old birds, with one stone." "Uh, no." "Why not?" "No." "Forget it." "Tommy, Tommy." "My uncle and" "Your father." "We move them in" "Together." "OK?" "They can keep" "Their one good eye on each" "Other, we don't have to worry." "I mean, what's gonna happen?" "They gonna die at the exact" "Same moment?" "I mean, I wouldn't" "Bet on that." "Are you insane?" "Are you" "Completely, completely out of" "Your mind?" "You know what this" "Is?" "It's stephen king's next" "Novel, OK?" "Between the drinking" "And the fighting and the black" "Rage, you're creating a sick" "Evil vortex which could" "Basically wipe out most of the" "Eastern seaboard." "You want to know something?" "I ran it by my uncle and he's" "Onboard." "It's amazing what" "Lying 10 hours naked on the" "Bottom of a tub will do to some" "People." "And we called your" "Father, he said, no problem." "Uncle red's tidying up the" "Joint right now, says we can" "Move your dad in tonight." "What do you think?" "It's on your head." "Hey, look, what are you" "Worried about?" "OK, besides the" "Vortex and the subsequent" "Millions of innocent lives" "Lost, I don't see the downside." "You should be thanking me." "Uh-Huh." "Now, if it's a boy, OK," "What about, roman?" "Roman?" "Yeah." "As in polanski?" "No, like in Gabriel." "Oh, Gabriel." "I like that." "I like Gabriel." "You do?" "Yeah, it's strong, but it's" "Sexy." "Yes." "Yes, it is." "OK, but, just bear with me," "I got it." "All right, you ready" "For this?" "Uh-Huh." "Namath Gavin." "Huh?" "How cool" "Is that?" "Namath?" "Yeah, it's sexy, it's strong." "Uh-Huh." "Honey, let me ask you" "Something, is that whole list" "Just a list of names of past" "And present nfl quarterbacks?" "Well, yeah." "Yeah, and that's where you" "Came up with the idea of namath" "Gavin?" "Well, actually, I was" "Thinking more along the lines" "Of Joe montana, but then, you" "Kind of latched on to the whole" "Roman Gabriel last name angle," "So I called an audible, right," "I scrambled." "Nice." "But I truly believe that" "Namath Gavin is an original," "Great name." "Huh?" "No?" "Go to work." "Yeah." "Just think about" "Namath." "It's sexy and it's" "Strong." "And do me a favor and think" "About a new list." "Pension?" "Oh!" "What the hell?" "Crunching some numbers, huh?" "Thinking about getting out?" "No." "Just, you know, you've" "Been talking about, you know," "Your pension and retirement," "Blah blah blah." "I just thought," "Hey, you know what, I never" "Really sat down and thought" "Based on my overtime, you know," "This year, and my salary," "What would I leave with if I" "Wanted to leave, not that I'm" "Thinking of leaving." "And it's" "Not as bad as I thought it" "Would be." "I mean, it would be" "Tight with Janet and the" "Divorce and the kids and" "Everything, but... but it's tempting, right?" "Hey, maybe I can get you on" "The boat." "You know, there might" "Be room." "I'll put in a call." "I don't know about tempting," "You know?" "But you know, figures are" "Figures, Lou." "You start really" "Thinking about this shit, and" "You know, I think about those" "Kids I saw over at needles'" "Firehouse, man." "I mean, they're" "Kids." "They're really kids." "You know, and then I think" "About our probie, you know?" "What he was like when he first" "Came in here." "He didn't know" "His ass from his elbow." "And" "You think about this kid in" "A fire, then you think about" "What he did just in the" "Stackhouse thing, man he was" "Key." "He was the man that day," "And he learned all that shit" "From us." "Those kids in needles'" "Firehouse, like that's what" "He's doing." "I think you have" "A responsibility to teach them" "Enough so they can handle it" "Before you leave them on their" "Own." "Yeah, you know, but, at what" "Point does it stop, t?" "I mean, what point do you" "Stand back and say to yourself," "Jeez, you know, I'm lucky to" "Still be alive." "And there's a" "Little time left." "I mean, you" "Know, you've got two kids," "What about them?" "Tommy?" "Oh, Jesus!" "What the hell?" "Sorry." "Why is everybody sneaking up" "On me today?" "Can I talk to you for a sec?" "About what?" "It's sort of about the gay" "Thing." "Mikey, I really don't feel" "Like talking about the gay" "Thing right now." "I know you've just been so" "Supportive, I thought maybe I" "Could get some advice, you" "Know?" "About what?" "Well, I was in barney's" "Yesterday, I went to get a new" "Shirt, and I wandered around" "For like 3 hours." "That can happen with anybody." "You're looking at ties and" "Whatever." "You lose track of... well, they were selling" "Face cream." "You know, like" "Face cream for guys, and I" "Tried a sample, and my pores" "Felt great." "Franco uses face creams." "I mean, that doesn't mean" "Anything." "On my way home, I stopped," "And I got a pedicure." "Again, I mean, that's not... and then, I got my ass" "Waxed." "Whew... you got any girls left on your" "Cell phone?" "Any numbers?" "Yeah." "Well, you need to call some" "Girl that you know." "Some girl" "That you can, you know, screw" "Around with." "I mean, that's" "The best thing I can tell you." "You just gotta remind yourself" "How, how great... chicks are." "You know, remind yourself how" "Soft their hair is." "How soft" "Their skin is, what they smell" "Like." "You know, the curve of" "Their hips." "Tits, kid." "Think tits." "Thanks, t." "Yoo-Hoo, Tom, it's Sheila." "I got a little message for you." "I found a couple of those" "You know whatskis in Damien's" "Room that you were looking for," "So, I don't know, call me back," "Or just stop by after work and" "Pick them up, OK?" "I gotta go," "OK, bye." "Hi." "Sorry, sorry," "Sorry." "Ms. Keefe, janine klein." "Pleasure to meet you." "Nice to meet you." "So, I understand you're" "Interested in our beachfront" "Properties." "I am." "I am actually" "Interested in this one" "Specifically." "That's my" "Favorite." "And my friend, my" "Male friend, my male friend" "That I was just on the phone" "With whose actually my late" "Husband's cousin who may at" "Some point be living with me" "In this home, it's so" "Complicated, I'll tell you" "About it later." "Anyway, this" "Is his favorite, too." "OK." "It's still available, right?" "Oh, yes." "Good." "I'll take it." "Um, don't you want to see" "The property first?" "Well, does it look like it" "Does in the pictures?" "Yeah, yeah, absolutely." "And, um, it's pretty on" "The inside?" "It's adorable." "Then it's mine." "Who should I make this out to?" "Hey." "Hello." "You ain't returning any of" "My calls, and that is just not" "Very polite." "Yeah, well, you're the" "Expert on polite." "Oh, wait." "No, you're not." "I got you a present." "Two avocados?" "Yeah, well, I was trying to" "Come up with a peace offering." "So I thought I'd make you a" "Cake or something only I don't" "Know how to cook or any of that" "Shit, so I thought I'd go to" "The store, and I'd buy you a" "Cake, only they're too" "Expensive." "And I can't go to" "My bakery because I told the" "Guy that his cannolis tasted" "Like cat piss." "So I got the" "Avocados." "I think they're ripe." "OK, well, I, um, I talked" "To father dan, or tried to," "Turns out we've been banned" "From getting married anywhere" "Near the diocese much less" "In it." "Well, Sean, I am sorry." "I really am." "Can you not hear" "Me saying it?" "I am sorry." "Maggie Gavin is saying she's" "Sorry." "She must really be in" "Love, huh?" "She is, Sean." "In letters 8 miles high." "Well, you know what," "Maggie, after your performance" "The other day with the priest," "I went home, and I was really" "Upset, and I was thinking" "About you, and I threw up." "And I thought to myself, you" "Know what, I'm not the smartest" "Guy on the planet, but maybe" "You shouldn't get married to" "A person that actually makes" "You throw up." "OK, I don't like to puke." "It's not gonna work." "Sean." "You're making me cry." "You're" "Such an asshole!" "Sean, that is so unfair!" "Here you go, Mike." "Sangria." "My own kick-Ass recipe." "I made a great, big batch of it" "In honor of your moving in." "Hey, you hear that?" "Never got any goddamn sangria" "At your place." "So listen up, before you two" "Punks hit the bricks, I got a" "Couple of things I want to make" "Clear." "This is my house, we go" "By my rules." "You hear that, dad?" "Hey, I'm not talking to him," "Ass face, I'm talking to" "You two." "Ass face?" "That's a good" "One, red." "You don't show up" "Unannounced." "You call first." "'Cause we might be busy." "Or we" "May not be in the mood to look" "At your ugly mugs." "If we need" "Something from you, we'll call" "You, otherwise, back off." "I catch you snooping around," "Checking on us, there'll be a" "Beating in it for you." "Look at 'em, red." "You know" "Dumb and dumber, this is" "Dickless and dicklesser." "Ready to go?" "How do you feel?" "So much better." "That was" "Incredible." "I'm always here to help," "Mike." "You have another crisis," "Just give me a call." "You think I'm OK?" "What do you think?" "I think I'd like a sandwich." "Good for you, slugger." "You know your... your hair's like, so soft" "And silky." "It smells so good." "What do you use, like some kind" "Of, like, nice conditioner or" "Something, 'cause you know," "My 'do's really been bumming me" "Out lately." "I feel like I got" "This, like, dry hair and split" "Ends and, what are you doing?" "We gotta go again." "Oh, God!" "Oh!" "Whew!" "Oh, man!" "Oh, yeah, wicked." "Wicked man Mr. Reilly." "That I am." "Everything" "All right?" "Glorious." "I'm very impressed" "By your stamina." "I mean, Mr. Wonderful here," "We had a little help." "Oh, and they say it's hard" "To find good help these days." "Madonna." "Yeah." "She's awesome, man." "She's a badass bitch." "I can't believe I'm actually" "Hearing this." "The wifey wanted to go" "See it." "You know, so we wanted" "Nd some qt together." "And don't make the obvious" "Queer time joke either." "That's old." "Look, this ain't about" "Queers." "I mean madonna's whole" "Show is full of them." "Right?" "There's about 40 of them" "Dancing up on stage." "Maybe 15" "Costume changes for her and" "The guys." "It's deep, bro." "Oh!" "Oh, Jesus." "What's wrong, baby?" "God, my chest." "Jerry, what is it?" "I can't breathe." "Tell me what's wrong." "Oh, God." "I think you better" "Call somebody." "Oh, God!" "You're gonna be OK, Jerry." "Please, call somebody." "Don't worry." "You're gonna" "Be fine." "Karlene, call 911." "You don't need to call" "Anybody." "You need to call somebody." "I need help." "Nobody can know about this." "They'll find out I was here." "I'll lose my job." "I'll lose" "Everything." "I was never here, Jerry." "You gotta remember that." "Karlene, you gotta... karlene, please, wait." "Help me here." "I got one word for you." "Faggy?" "No." "Cher." "Oh, Jesus." "It's 4:30 in" "The morning." "This is no time" "To be having this discussion." "Hey, there's no smoking in" "The car, bro." "Take the smoke" "Out." "You're gonna mess up my new" "Shirt." "Listen, luis, luis." "Let me" "Break it down to you, all right?" "Cher, she invented that shit." "I saw her live like 10, 12" "Years ago." "And every outfit" "That she changed into, every" "Pair of pants... yeah?" "Assless." "You mean like those... yeah, I'm talking no" "Material covering the ass area." "Bare assed, assed out, dancing" "On the stage for two hours." "And Cher's got a gold medal ass." "You tell your little friend" "Madonna to match that action." "Does Cher have a song where" "All the gay dancers rollerskate?" "Madonna had rollerskating?" "Johnny!" "Johnny!" "Johnny, Johnny, hey, hey!" "Hey, you OK?" "Can you hear me?" "Johnny!" "Jesus!" "Jesus!" "Dispatch!" "Dispatch!" "10-13." "Officer down, dispatch." "Officer down." "We need an" "Ambulance asap." "Where are we," "Where are we?" "131St and" "St. Nick." "We need an ambulance" "Now." "Partner shot." "Three shots" "To the chest." "We need backup." "We need an ambulance. 10-13." "Hey, Johnny, you OK, Johnny?" "Can you hear me?" "They're coming," "Johnny, they're coming!"