"Yes, ma'am, how ya doin'?" "Is this Rose Hill?" "Good, This is Ed Couch." "I'm Vesta Adcock's nephew." "I need to get up there and see her, but I'm gonna be late 'cause I'm lost out here." "We're off the Alabama interstate but I don't know where." " Did you hear that?" " What?" "The train." "No, I didn't hear no train." "Oh, nothin', I guess." " Where's "Whistle Stop" on the map?" " I can't find it." "Why did you tell me to turn right 10 miles back there?" "God, you got a negative sense of direction, hon." "I'm sorry." "Oh, Ed, your aunt's gonna be so disappointed we're late." "I know she's been looking forward to this visit all week long." "Bless her sweet, little ol' heart." "Hey, how's my sweet Auntie V this afternoon?" "Remember us?" " Don't you look pretty!" " We brought you something." "Let me look at you." "Don't you know Evelyn loves you?" "Well, honey, I guess it'd be better if you wait out here for me." "I'll get all this stuff." " Well, if you think it's best." "Yeah, I do this time." "Okay?" "Have a nice day, Aunt Vesta." "Don't you pitch a fit like that'" "Did you know they took my gallbladder out?" "No, I didn't." "Oh, yes." "Still in the hospital in ajar." "I guess that's where they keep 'em." "I guess." "When I was in the hospital, the nurse gave me one of them Fleet enemas they're so fond of." "Mrs. Cleo Threadgoode, 82 year old widow, imagine that." "Actually, everybody calls me Ninny." "'Course I'm just visitin' here." "Did you ever have one of them Fleet enemas?" "Um, well?" "No." "You'd remember it." "Me and my friend, Mrs. Otis, come from Whistle Stop." "You ever been to Whistle Stop?" "Why, yes." "I just passed by there today." "She's lived down the street from me for 30 years or more." "After her son died, her daughter-in-law had a fit for her to come live at the nursing home." "They asked me to come and be her roommate." "Mrs. Otis don't know it, but I'm going home just soon as she gets settled in good." "Does the name "Idgie Threadgoode" ring a bell?" "Um, no, ma'am." "I don't think so." "You'd remember her." "You see, I was practically adopted by the Threadgoode family." " I married her brother, Cleo." " Oh, uh-huh." "Idgie and her friend Ruth, ran the Whistle Stop Cafe." "Oh." "Idgie was a character, all right." "But how anybody could've thought... she murdered that man is beyond me." "I beg your pardon?" "You sit and relax a while." "I'll tell you all about it." "Oh, now, let's see." "I 'member the day they pulled that truck up out of the river." "That same rainy summer day..." "Idgie Threadgoode was arrested for the murder of the owner of that truck," "Frank Bennett." "I guess, to understand Idgie, you'd have to start way back with her brother, Buddy." "Idgie was Buddy's pet from the day she was born." "I 'member the day we was all gettin' ready for Leona's weddin'." "The war had just ended, the Great one, you know." "And another one was about to begin in the Threadgoode house." "Sipsey hone )4 is that finished?" " Buddy, get dressed honey." " Mama?" "Leona, what is it?" "Idgie's upstairs in her room... and says she won't come out as long as she lives." " She is gonna ruin my weddin'!" " Shh." "Leona, you're gonna be the most beautiful bride." "Of course she is, Papa." "Your papa has spent every last nickel he has just to make you happy." "Now, you try to act a little grateful, young lady." "Imogene Louise Threadgoode!" "This is your mama!" "You come down here right now." "Do you hear me?" " Buddy, fetch her." "She'll listen to you." " Come on down, little bit." "There's no firing' squad waiting' for you." "Ohh!" "Come on, honey Let us see you." "You look so pretty." " I see London, I see" " Hush!" "Julian, hush." "Come ahead, sweetheart." "You look awful nice in that." " Mama!" " You look fine." "She looks like a monkey" "Julian, stop it right this second!" "Take it back!" "Take it back!" "Idgie, hey!" "I told you she was gonna ruin my weddin'!" " Idgie, get up." " Take it back!" "Take it back!" " I'll get you for this." " No, Buddy." "We have to be careful when she's dressing up." "She's just a pain!" "Leona, will you stop shrieking'" "This is your weddin ' day'" "I oaks like you got yourself up a tree, little bit." "I'm sick of people makin' fun of me." "So you're gonna stay up here all day long." "Yep." "The hell with them." "Who wants to wear that stupid ol' dress anyway?" " I ever tell you about the oysters?" " Oysters?" " I tell you about the oysters?" " No." "Think about the millions of oysters lying' around the ocean." "Then one day..." "God comes along and sees one and he says," ""I think I'm gonna make that one different."" "You know what he does?" "He puts a little piece of sand in it." " Guess what it can do that the others can't." " What?" "It can make a beautiful pearl." "What if God made a mistake?" "Well, the way I figure it, he never makes mistakes." "I mean, he made sure we got together." "He made sure you got the best looking, most charming' brother in the world..." " who's gonna beat you to the chocolate cake." " You will not." "Got you out of the tree, didn't I?" "Did not!" "Into this estate, these two come now to be joined" "If any man present can show cause... why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him speak now or forever after hold his peace." "Please be seated." "If either of you know any reason... why you may not justly be joined together in holy matrimony do you now confess it?" "It is then your will to proceed." "Do you, Charles Osgood justice" "Thank you." "I don't know what we'd do without your generosity." "Sipsey, especially you." "Look what you've clone!" "Thank you, Mrs. Threadgoode." "Gimme that, you rascal!" "John!" "Jump on my back" "I don't think there ever was a sweeter boy than Buddy Threadgoode." " You look beautiful, Lily." " Yes, Lily, you sure do." "I had the biggest crush on him." "He was a terrible flirt!" "But his heart belonged to Ruth Jamison." "She was the daughter of a friend of his mama's... who was visitin' that summer." "Ruth Jamison, you're just the one I've been lookin' for." " Are you thirsty?" " Let's go visit someplace else." "Think that's a big lake, you should've seen the one next to our house." "We used to swim in it and fish." "I sure do miss it." "Sure do." "What happened to it?" "Did it dry up?" "No, worse than that." "Last fall, a ﬂock of ducks, 40 or 50 of 'em, landed right smack in the middle of it." "This ﬂuke thing happened." "The temperature dropped so fast that the whole lake froze... in three seconds, just like that!" "Those poor little ducks." "Did it kill them?" "No, they ﬂew off and took the lake with 'em." "To this very day, that lake is somewhere over in Georgia." "Buddy Threadgoode." "Come a little closer." "I wanna give you something." "Come here." "Whoop!" "Come back here, hat." "Where do you think you're gain'?" "Whoa!" "I got it." "Hold on, Ruth." "Hold on, little bit." "It's all right." "I got it." "Come here, you damn hat." "Got it!" "Oh, I meant to do that." "I... got it!" "Ta-da!" "All right." "Damn!" "Come on." "Come on." "Get out." "Get out." "Buddy!" " Buddy!" " Buddy Threadgoode!" "Come on, Buddy!" "Get out." "Get out of there." "Buddy!" " Come on, Buddy!" " Buddy'" "Buddy!" "No-o-o!" "Buddy!" "Buddy, no!" "No!" "No!" "Buddy!" "No-o-o!" "No!" "Buddy!" "Let me go!" " No!" " Buddy!" "You got to go back to the house." "Come on." "We're gonna go home." " Buddy!" " You have to be strong." " It'll be okay." " Buddy!" ""The Lord is my Shepherd," "I shall not want."" "Oh, it like to have killed us all" "But nary a one took it as hard as Idgie," "everyone thought she 'o' die right along with him." "Night alter night, she stayed by the river." "Big George was the only soul she'd let near her, and he watched over her night and day" "You know, a heart can be broken, but it still keeps a-beatin' just the same." "Miss Idgie, you'll have to keep this blanket on... or you'll catch your death of cold, you hear me now?" "That's so sad." "Ah." "Would you like one of these?" "Oh, thank ya, honey." "Evelyn?" "Honey, we gotta get goin'." "The Braves' game's fixin' to start... and you're gonna miss your... thing." "Excuse me." "That's my husband, Ed." "Hi, ma'am." "How you doin'?" "Um." "I can't believe Buddy died." "Neither could I." "Oh, well, I enjoyed talking' to you, honey." "What's your name?" "Evelyn..." "Evelyn Couch." " I've got to go." " You come back and see me, you hear?" " Okay." " Bye-bye." "First of all, I want you... to truly dedicate yourselves... to finding little ways to putting that magic, that spark... back into your marriage." "When we think of romance and marriage," " what is the first thought that comes into your mind?" " Divorce!" "Remember when counselors used to tell you to wrap yourself in cellophane... to put a little charge into your marriage?" "Do we really pay for these lectures?" "You can see, it is truly up to you... to put romance back into your relationship." "Evelyn, have you gone insane?" "My God people can see you!" "What if I had been the paperboy?" "Get in there!" "What are you thinking about?" "Evelyn?" " Evelyn!" " Oh." "You know, what we really need instead of this baloney... is an assertiveness training class for Southern women." "But that's a contradiction in terms, isn't it?" "Especially you, sweetheart." "You're livin' in the Dark Ages." " Hi, honey." "I need one of those." " Hi!" "Mmm, you smell good too." "I need one of these." " Oh, this looks good!" " Uh-huh." "Yes, indeedy." "Ed." "Why don't you come in?" "and sit down at the table..." " and have dinner with me?" " I'm sorry." "The game's almost over." "I just want to see a little bit of it." "Why you so dressed up?" "Honey, don't get in the way." "Scoot over a bit." "Ed?" "If I'd answered the door wearing only cellophane, would you still be watching the baseball game?" "No, honey." "I'd probably be checking you into a looney bin." "Hi, sugar." " How's my dumpling'?" " Trick or treat!" "You 're not gonna throw them hissy-fits, are you?" "Happy Halloween!" "Oh, no." "No, no, no!" "You 're meaner than a damn snake." "I'm glad you're feeling better." " Get back in bed" " Good thing your eyesight's failing." " Hey!" " Mmm." "Oh." " Hey." " I was hopin' you'd be here." "My roommate, Mrs. Otis, said I could visit her family, but I said, "Thank you kindly, but I think I might have my own visitor."" "And here you are." " Well, sit down." " Thank you." "And doughnuts to boot!" "You can't beat that." " Well, help yourself, Mrs. Threadgoode." " Thank you." "How's your friend?" " Mrs. Otis?" " Uh-huh." " Well, not so good." " Oh." "Looks like I won't be gettin' home for quite a while, and I sure miss it." "Funny what you miss when you're away from home." "I miss the smell of coffee... and bacon frying'." "Oh, what I wouldn't give for a plate of fried green tomatoes... like we used to have at the cafe." "Ooh!" "I never told you about the cafe, did I?" "No, ma'am." "Oh, well..." "now let me back up a bit." "You see, Idgie never quite got over losing Buddy." "She hardly ever come home." "Only Big George knew how to find her." "She just didn't seem to care about anythin' anymore." "Then, one summer day her mama sent for her." "Like they say" "God never shuts one door without opening another." " That was also the day Idgie met Frank Bennett," " Mama!" "The man whose murder got her arrested" "Well, hello there, miss." "And who might you be?" "Towanda to you." "Who are you?" "Oh, Frank Bennett's the name, Miss Towanda." "I must say you are lookin' mighty fine today." "You a politician... or does lying just run in your family?" "Mama!" "Well, there you are!" "Well, it's about time, Idgie." "If you don't look like the wild man of Borneo." " Here you go." " Well, thank you." "Guess who's here?" "Who?" "Ruth." "She's stayin' with us this summer... and will be in charge of all the young people's activities at the church." " Is that why you wanted to see me?" " We have so many things planned." "Ruth?" " You remember my youngest child?" " Of course I do." "Hi, Idgie." "Hi." "Maybe this isn't such a good idea." "Oh, it's got to work." "Somebody's got to help her." "I can't." "Are you sure you want to go to this river club, Miss Ruth?" "These ain't no churchgoing folks." "I'll do just fine, George, thank you." "Oh, excuse me." "Is Idgie Threadgoode here by any chance?" "Come on in, honey." "She's right down here." " Here?" "Okay." " Uh-huh." "I'll see you, Grady Kilgore, and I'll raise you twenty." "You ain't got nothin'!" "Maybe I do and maybe I don't." "Put your money where your mouth is, Mr. Sheriff." "Well, look what the cat drug in!" "I came to talk to you." "You're gonna have to wait." "I'm busy." "Come on, Grady, this is your big chance." "You in or out?" "I'll make you a rich man." "You just bluffing' again as usual" "I'm afraid you're gonna have to excuse Idgie." "She's goin' home for dinner." " Say good-bye, Idgie." " Where you goin'?" " Where the hell you goin' with my money?" " We're goin' home!" " Who are you to boss me around?" " The one holdin' your money!" "Give it back." "Now, get in the car." "All right." "I'll get in the car." "You win!" "Come on." "Sucker!" "I'll leave when I want!" "I don't know how you can break your mother's heart like you do." "I'm not doin' anything to my mother." "Oh, no?" "Why do you think I'm here for the summer?" "Your mother was so worried, she thought I might be able to talk some sense into you." "But you're too busy being selfish!" "What are you talkin' about?" "You're not the only one who lost Buddy." "We all miss him... but turning your back on your family is not gonna help." "What's he got to do with anything?" "I oaks like you 're the one with the problem forgetting my brother." "Why just ten miles a way .." "Down by the river, there lurks a den of the devil..." "Where liquor and gambling'... and sin abide!" "Snakes and serpents" "Hey, Scroggins!" "You're finally preaching' about somethin' you're kin to... snakes!" "As I said, snakes and serpents take many disguises." "Let's turn to page 53 in our hymnal." "Yoo-hoo!" "Big George thought I might find you here." "If you give me a chance, a chance to get to know you, maybe it'll be fun!" "Fun?" "Idgie, just spend some time with me." "Please?" "Suit yourself." "You sure you don't wanna back out?" " It's not too late." " I'm sure." "Here, hold this." "Tell me now, you like trains?" " Yes." " Good." "We'll get along just fine!" "Boy, did we luck out tonight." "Hop in." "Hop?" "Oh." "Give me your hand." "Put your foot up there." "Hold that." "Ooo-ooo!" "Look at all this!" "Don't you think we should get off the train?" "It's startin' to move." "No." "The fun just started!" "You all right?" "Well, sometimes I get a little dizzy lookin' down." "Don't look down." " What are you doin'?" " Come on." "Look." "They're throwin' away food!" "You talk about "give unto others."" "Yes, but this food isn't yours to give." "That's church talk." "I've seen those same people over at church on Sunday... over at the river club every other night of the week, doin' anything but pray." "Come on." " More!" " Give me some." "Okay, time to get off." "We gotta jump." "Lump?" "Yeah jump." "The next stop's five miles down the tracks." "I don't wanna walk that far back." "Are you crazy?" "You're not kiddin'." "Well..." "I give up." "Jump." "I'll tell Mama I'm not a good influence on you" "You'll never jump, will you?" "Don't say "never" to me." "Towanda!" " You all right?" " I'm fine." "I'm all right." "Ow!" "Does this hurt?" "Guess so." " We better get you to a doc-doctor." " Shit!" "Which way is it?" "About two miles down the tracks." "All right." "let's go." "You'll never be able to carry me that far." "I know." "Never say never." "I'm not carryin' you." "You're walkin'." "Thank you, Julian." "I owe you one." "Uh." "Ow." "Aren't you ready yet?" "What?" "This doesn't have anything to do with trains, does it?" "You like honey?" "Yeah, I like honey." " Fresh honey?" " Yeah." "Me too." "There it is." "There what... is?" "You'll see soon enough." "Now... stay here." "No matter what happens, don't move." "What are you gonna do?" "Ah." "Here you are, madam." "This is for you." "Why did you do that?" "You could have been killed." "I'm sorry." "Don't you want the honey?" "I got it just for you." "It's all right." "I do it all the time." "I never get stung, honest." "Don't be mad at me, Ruth." "Idgie." "I'm not mad at you." "No foolin'?" "Is it bad, what I did?" "No." "I thought I might be crazy or somethin'." "No, no." "I've heard there were people who could charm bees." "I've just never seen it done..." "before today." "You're just a bee charmer, Idgie Threadgoode." "That's what you are, a bee charmer." "Here, you want to taste it?" ""Satan started to laugh at job's devotion." ""He bet God that job would never have so much faith..." ""if he didn't have so many blessings." ""He went on and on so long and so much that God finally agreed..." ""to let Satan put Job to a test." ""Suddenly from bein' on top of the world," "Job was plunged down into the deepest pits of misery."" "Surprise!" "Idgie Threadgoode!" "Tonight we're gonna have a real party." "Drink this... and then, we're gonna play some poker." "I don't know how to play poker and I never drink... but thank you anyway." "Here comes the windup." "Burn that ball in here." "Burn 'em in here!" " Right in the pocket." " I don't know how to bat." "And you don't drink, either." " It's gonna be a spitter." " Hold the bat and swing" "Spitter?" " She gonna spit at me?" " She's gonna spit on the ball" "Swing that bat!" "Take another crack at it." "I'm gonna take another crack at it." "Get 'em in here." "Now run, Ruth." "Run!" "Come on around the bases!" "Don't kiss everybody." "Run!" "I have never had so much fun... in my whole life." "I even got a home run." "A clean one at that!" "A straight beats three of a kind." "You know, poker isn't half bad." "What's your mother gonna say... when she sees us both..." "drunk?" " You gotta stop worrying about what people think." " I know." "You've always done the right thing." "You took care of your daddy, the preacher, when he took sick." "You take care of all the kids over at the church school." "You're gonna take care of your mama." "And I'm gonna marry the man I'm supposed to." "You gettin' married?" "As soon as the summer's over." "Oh, am I gonna miss you." "This is the best birthday..." "I ever had." "Ruth invited Idgie to the weddin', but Idgie never did write back." "No, but she did drive all night to Valdosta, Georgia, to watch from afar." "Oh, here we go!" "And she swore she'd never see Ruth again." "No sir!" "Whew!" "Now, Mama Jamison, you put that down." "Oh, my Lord!" "During these next few weeks, we will be learning to reclaim our own power as women!" "Hallelujah!" "And tonight, we're gonna begin to explore... our own femaleness... by examining the source of our strength... and our separateness." "Our vaginas." "So if ya'll will just slip off your panties... and straddle your mirrors." "Ms. Couch!" "Ms. Couch!" "Um, I need to be excused for a minute." "Um, Missy, could you come with me to the ladies' room?" " Do you find this threatening?" " Uh, well, um  do you have a problem with your sexuality?" " No, ma'am." "But I do have a problem with my girdle." "All right, fried chicken!" "My favorite." "Ed?" "Ed?" "Those classes I've been taking aren't helping' us one bit." "Let's go to Florida... like when we got married." "Kyle's gone, busy with his own life." "It'd be just the two of us." "Well, honey, it's just the two of us here now." "Boy, you got a good scald on that chicken!" " I'm tellin' you, that's really good." " Thank you." "We could rent a boat... and drift around in the hot sun." "What do you think about it?" "I'm just gettin' used to it being quiet around here." "Honey, if those classes aren't doin' you any good, then don't go to 'em." "Everyone needs a miracle in their life." "Damn, game's blacked out!" "Yoo-hoo, Mrs. Threadgoode?" "Hey." "Evelyn!" "Do you like it?" "Oooh!" "Well," " who did it for ya, darlin'?" " Believe it or not," "It was a student, a little bitty thing, no bigger than a midget from the beauty college." "Sometimes they come out here and do our hair for free... just for the practice, you know." " Is Ed with ya?" " No, ma'am." "His aunt said she didn't want visitors anymore, especially us." "It's a shame." "I know he feels bad, but Lord if he'll talk to me about it." "Oh, thank you." " Merry Christmas." " Merry Christmas." "Mrs. Threadgoode" "How about tellin' me some more..." "about Idgie?" "Oh, well, now, let me see." "Where were we?" "Ruth had just gotten married to Frank Bennett?" "Wasn't that the man Idgie was arrested for murdering'?" "That's right." "After Ruth left, Idgie went back to her old ways," "Hangin' out with Grady and the boys at the river club." "But after a few years, temptation got the better of her." "I don't wanna wake you, Miss Idgie, but it's an all-day drive to Valdosta." "Your mama said if you're goin', she wants you to take this pie to Miss Ruth." "How does she know where I'm going?" " I told her." "Don't you go stirring' up no trouble for Miss Ruth now." " Yes, ma'am." " Don't "yes, ma'am" me." "You can stay in my house as long as you want, but don't treat me like you treat your mama." " Grandma!" " Yes, ma'am." "Hi there." " Yes?" " Uh, is Ruth at home?" "Who's callin'?" "You just tell her it's the bee charmer from Alabama." "Ruth, there's some bee person here to see you." " Idgie." " Hi." "You got a real nice home, real nice things and all." "Mm-hmm, thank you." "Mama said to give you this pie." "So" "Idgie Threadgoode, how are ya?" "You look so..." "so grown up." "All the guys must be wild about you." "Tell me, do you have a fella yet?" "A... couple." "I haven't decided on any." "Grady's the most persistent, but" " Grady Kilgore?" " Don't say it so loud." "Ruth, honey who's down there?" " Hey" " Well" " What happened to you?" " Nothin'." "Nothin'!" "Where'd you get the shiner?" "Well, I- Who's down there?" " You'd better leave now." " Did he hit you?" " Did he beat you?" "Somebody's got to talk to him." " Idgie." " You're not gonna do anything." " I'm gonna kill him." "I'm gonna have a conversation with him about..." " You're not gonna do anything." " ...pickin' on somebody his own size." "You're not gonna do anything, understand?" "If you care about me, if you really do, you'll turn around and leave this minute." "You understand?" "Well, what'd she want?" "Nothin'." "Ruth's a grown woman, and she knows what's best for her." "Mmm, I'm not so sure about that." "Idgie?" "Grady." "Hi." " Idgie, will you dance with me?" " No." "Come on." "It's only a dance." " Miss Idgie Threadgoode..." " Get your butt off the ﬂoor." "Will you dance with me?" "I will not dance with you, and I will not marry you." "Go marry Gladys Moats." "She just adores you." "But she did fall on her head when she was a child." "You're just a goofy girl, Idgie, a goofy girl." " Who're you callin' a goof?" " Ow-ow-ow!" " Who you callin' a goof?" " Stop that before I get mad and hurt ya." "Oh, yeah." "You try it." " Grady!" " There now, you give up?" "No, I'll never give up!" "Grady finally got dizzy and give up." "Try as they might, none of them fellas could tame Idgie." "Now, a little while later, a letter come from Ruth." "Oh." "It's an obituary." "Oh, no, honey, Ruth's mother died." "Oh." "And this is from the Bible." "It's from the book of Ruth." ""And Ruth said, whither thou goest, I will go;" ""where thou lodgest, I will lodge;" "thy people shall be my people."" "All right Julian, you and Big George wait here." " Mama died." " I know." "And I'm pregnant." "Julian, I got another box here when you're done!" "I never seen anybody with so many hats." "Why don't we put three in one box?" "I don't think we can fit all these in the car." "We're gonna need a separate truck for all your stuff." "What the hell is going on here?" "Looks like your wife's leavin' you, mister." " Sure she is." "Don't you touch her!" "Let go." "You bastard!" "Put her down!" " Bastard!" " Whoooo!" "Stop it!" "Don't you hurt her!" "Frank!" "I wouldn't do that if I was you, mister." "See, the thing is, you might upset Big George." "And he's crazy" "There's no tellin' what he might do." "Go on, get outta here." "Hey!" "Come on!" "Hey hey!" "Come on now!" "Let's go." "Come on." "You okay?" "Let's get Miss Ruth and get outta here." "Come on, Miss Ruth." "Come on." "If you ever touch her again, I'll kill you." "Well, I sure as hell scared him, didn't I?" "Yeah you sure scared him." "Towanda, the amazing Amazon woman!" "Towanda?" "Towanda!" "Towanda!" "Evelyn?" "Evelyn!" "Oh!" "I'm sorry." "I was just lookin' at the pictures, Missy." "They have the greatest stories in that magazine, don't they?" "Will I see you in group tonight?" "We'll be talking about masturbation." "No, I don't think so." "I think I've had enough learning' for the time bein'." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Oh!" "Excuse me." "Screw you!" "Excuse me, young man." "There was no reason for you to be so rude to me." " Get away from me, you fat cow." " What did you call me?" "Beat it, you old bitch." "Why are you being so mean to me?" "What did I ever do to you" "I don't understand!" "Look at my Stove Top!" "BOO!" "Oh, honey, what in the world is the matter?" "I don't know." "Come on." "Come on." "I need some exercise." "Now, you tell me what's botherin' you, sugar." "I just- I just feel so useless." "So- So powerless." " Everybody goes through that." " But I can't stop eatin'." "Every day I try and try and every day I go off." "I hide candy bars all over the house." "A candy bar ain't gonna hurt ya none." "One, no." "But 10 or 11?" "I can't even look at my own vagina." "I can't help ya on that one." "I wish I had the courage to get it over with and get really fat." "Oh, Mrs. Threadgoode, I just" "I'm too young to be old and I'm too old to be young." "Maybe I'm just goin' crazy." "You get hot ﬂashes?" "Sometimes." "You get the sweats and your hearts starts a-poundin'?" " How did you know?" " Simple, honey." "You're going through the change." "I used to burst into tears for no reason at all." "You need some hormones." "Hmm?" "Maybe some Stresstabs number 4 for good measure." " Really?" "Is that all?" " Sure, honey." "You get yourself some hormones." "Then you get outta the house and get a job." "With your pretty complexion..." "I'll bet you'll be great with cosmetics." "I know how you feel." "I was about your age when I had my child." "Then I went through the change of life." " I didn't know you had a child." " Yes, I did." "Albert." "When he was born, the doctor said it would be best if I didn't see him." "He said his mind would never develop past the age of five, and I should just put him in an institution... because the burden of raisin' a child like that would be too great." "Well, I thought about Ruth." "She always said... there was a separate God for children." "Sol smiled at him and I asked for the baby." "Oh, how could anybody think that sweet, precious baby... could ever be a burden?" "Why, from the minute he was born, Albert was the joy of my life, the Lord's greatest gift." "I don't believe there was a purer soul ever lived on this earth." "I had him with me till he was 30." "Then he went to sleep and didn't wake up." "Sometimes I can't wait to get to heaven to see him again." "Whoa!" "Shit!" "It's a boy!" "I think a prayer of thanksgivin' would be in order." "Goddamn it to hell, son-of-a-bitch, she did it!" "Here's to Ruth!" "Idgie always did have a way with words around the reverend." "Well, Ruth had a baby" "She named him Buddy- Buddy junior." "Papa went out and borrowed money so Ruth and Idgie could start a cafe, the Whistle Stop 6.22%." "Miss Idgie can you get the door?" "Yes." "Big George." "Miss Ruth, me and the missus want to thank you... for sendin' that soup over last night." " I'll pay you when I get ahead." " You don't owe me, Ocie." " Thank you." " I'm just glad they're better." " How is this, by the way?" " It's good, very good." "I'm not happy till I see clean plates." "Can't go on, Idgie." "I'm talking to you as a friend." " There's people in this town, paying customers too" " There you go." "But some people don't like you... selling' to coloreds." "Here you go." "Tell you what." "Next time those "some people" come here," "I'm gonna ask if they don't want anybody to know... who they are under those sheets... when they go marchin' in those stupid parades, how come they don't have sense to change their shoes?" " Hold on there." " Y'all ain't foolin' anybody." "I'd recognize those size 14 clodhoppers you got anywhere." " Just a minute, Idgie." " More pie, Grady?" "No, thank you, Ruth." "Idgie, I'll talk to the boys." "You just keep them on out back there, ya hear?" " Bye, Ruth." " Bye, Grady." "You're gonna get yourself in a heap of trouble." "What, Grady?" "He's harmless." "You shoulda seen that big ox down by the river." "Three solid days, drunk as a dog, cryin' like a baby... 'cause Joe, that ol' colored man that raised him, died." " Remember that, Sipsey?" " Yes'm." " He sure ain't' jokin' now, is he, son?" " No, ma'am." "He won't even sit in the same room and have a meal today." "Don't make no sense." "Big ox like Grady won't sit next to a colored child, but he eats eggs- Shoot right out of a chicken's ass." "Come on, Smokey, let's go for a walk." "I'm sorry about spilling' my food, ma'am." "I'll just head on." "See that piece of land over there?" "See it?" "That used to be a lake." "Yeah." "This one November, all these ducks come by... and they landed on that lake." "Then the temperature dropped so fast, the whole lake just froze." "Then the ducks took off and took the lake with 'em." "Now that lake's somewhere in Georgia, the way I hear it." "Go on now." "God bless you, ma'am." "Here, try this." " So what do you think?" " They're okay." " The truth." " Well" "They're terrible." "Oh, well, don't be shy." "Tell me how you feel." "I will." "What'd you go and do that for?" "I just thought you needed a little cooling' off." "You're right." "Try these." "I think we need to make a little paste." "What in the name of Christmas are you two doing?" "She's tryin' to teach me how to cook." "Look at those fried green tomatoes." "You better stop this." "I'm gonna have to arrest you for disorderly conduct." "Arrest us then." "Let me handle this." " All right." " Grady." "Ha-ha-ha!" "Arrest us." "Go ahead, arrest us." "Ruth, I have to say it." "I believe Idgie's been a bad influence on ya." "I agree." "I'll be back in a minute." "Y'all keep the show going till then." "We ain't goin' nowhere." " ...down again." " She's still poorly." "Where's the baby?" "Who are you?" "What do you want?" "Frank!" "Get outta here." " Get on outta here!" " Go on, get outta here and leave us alone." "Come on now, Ruth." "You wouldn't deny a father the right to see his son, would ya?" "You git, I say." "Scat you!" "Damn!" "Gimme that." "Let it go!" "Well, that's my boy, isn't it?" "Everything all right, ma'am?" "Our guest is just leavin'." "Come on, Frank, let's go." "I'll be back." "In the end, you and the baby gonna be back." "I ain't scared of you!" "No, sir!" "You should be." "Mind your manners, boy!" "Grady, what does Gladys think of you stayin' out late... and losin' your money to me in poker night after night?" "She likes it just fine." " They got Big George." " Idgie!" " Let go of him!" " Let me handle this!" "We seen how you treat your niggers around here and we don't like it." "I'm the law in these parts." "I don't care what you like or don't like." "Turn him loose." "Don't get riled up, nigger lover." "You deaf or somethin'?" "I said, let him go!" " Before you get yourselves in a whole lot of trouble!" " Calm down." "We wanted to have a little get-together... and make sure we see eye to eye on some things." "You hear me now?" "Let's let him go, boys." "We've had enough fun for one night." " Turn him loose." " Come on." "No, you're gonna get in trouble." "Well, now, that's more like it." "Seems I don't recognize any of you boys." "Y'all ain't from Whistle Stop, are you?" "This ought to do it." "I want to thank you, Miss Idgie." "Forget it." "You'd have done the same for me." "Try to get some sleep." "Who the hell were those assholes?" "They's just some old boys from Georgia come over here to put a scare in you." "Well, it worked." "One of 'em was here the other day for something, seen you sellin' food to coloreds." "They decided to come back, shake you up a bit." "I told 'em we don't need anybody from Georgia comin' over here... tellin' us what we can or cannot do." "They won't be back." "I guaran-gol-damn-tee you that." "One other thing, little Miss Smarty-pants," "I do not wear a size 14 shoe... and I don't much care for parades, bedsheets or otherwise." "Hey." "What's the matter?" "It was Frank." "He saw the baby." " You sure it was him?" " Yes, I'm sure." "So that's why those Kluxers were here." "Let me take him." "Don't worry." "I mean, if he's dumb enough to come back here," "Grady and the Alabama boys will take care of him." "If they don't, I'll think of somethin'." "Don't take any chances." "Promise me you won't do anythin' crazy, no matter what." "Me?" "Not me." "I'm gonna put him down." "Hey little Buddy" "That was the last anyone saw of Frank Bennett... until the night of the town follies." "Ruth was away at one of the Reverend Scroggins' many revivals." "One thing a woman expects when she gets married... is sympathy." "Haven't you got that since you married me?" "I sure have..." "from the whole town." " Hey there!" " You got to come quick." "Well, the show has hardly begun." "You got to come quick now." "You hear me?" " Run, get help!" "Run, quick!" " Where's the baby?" "Never mind." "Excuse me, sir." "I don't believe you should be goin' anywhere... with Ruth's baby." "Thank you." "Hi there." "What can I do for you boys?" " Idgie." " Grady." " This here is Sheriff Curtis Smoote." " Hi there." " He's over here from Georgia." "He's lookin' for a fella." " Oh." " You recognize him?" " No." "That's my husband, but I haven't seen him in months." "I heard he got run over by a Brinks armored truck." "What's he done?" "Nothin' that we know of." "We're tryin' to find out what's been did to him." "He told his hired man he was comin' to see his wife and baby, but he ain't never showed up back home." "Hell, I told him if he showed up in this town, we'd all have known." "Looks a little sissified to me." "From what I hear, most you boys in Georgia... are a little light on your feet" "That's the way I heard it." "Could I interest you in some pie?" "No, ma'am, but that barbecue sure smells good." "Best damn barbecue in the state of Alabama." "Here you go." "That's your 4th one today." "I swear you're about to eat up all my barbecue." "Sit down." "Sit down." "You ain't foolin' me, girlie girl." "I know who you are." "I heard from Bennett's hired hand that you threatened to kill Frank." "He ain't showed up dead yet." "But if he does, you in a whole mess of trouble." "You understand?" "What we talkin' about is murder here." "Runnin' afoul of the law and nobody gets away with that, not even a bunch of Alabama smart alecks." "If I find so much as a hair of his head," "I'll arrest you faster than you can slap a tick, 'cause I'm the law, and you cant beat the law" "Hey there." "Tell me what he said." "Smoote's?" "I told you." "He said... that was the best damn barbecue he ever had." " That's all?" " No." " What else?" " He said the pie was pretty good too." "You sure you ain't never seen this man, boy?" "Yes, sir, and I already told ya, I ain't never seen him." "You'd do anything for Miss Idgie, wouldn't ya, boy?" "Yes, sir." "Would ya kill for her?" "Did ya kill for her?" "No, sir." "Well, now, maybe one of these days you'll tell the truth." "Just remember, we hang lying' niggers in Georgia... just as fast as they do in Alabama." "Yes, sir, I remember." "Sorry." " What are ya doin' in here?" " No milk in the house." "Where were you?" "Takin' care of business, havin' a good time." "I've been thinkin' maybe I should move on... because of Frank and all." "I just don't want you to feel like... you have to look out for us." "I just... don't want to be selfish, that's all." "Maybe if I wasn't here, you'd settle down." "I'm as settled as I ever hope to be." "Then... why can't you tell me where you were?" "I had a dream..." "the other night." "I dreamt that Buddy was gone." "I ran to his crib and there he was, sleepin' like an angel." "You know, I thanked God... for lettin' me still have Buddy." "And I remembered... havin' the same reaction after Frank would beat me, thanking' the Lord for givin' me the strength to take it." "And I remembered... thanking' the Lord for each day my mother lived," "even when she was spittin' up blood... and prayin' for me to kill her." "I looked in my mother's eyes pleading' for me to help her... and all I could do was pray." "While you were gone, as I was holdin' Buddy," "I thought if that bastard, Frank Bennett... ever tries to take my child," "I won't pray." "I'll break his neck." "Ruth, you don't have to worry about Frank Bennett anymore." "How can you say that?" "It's his child too." "He won't give up on his blood." "I'm only gonna tell you this one time." "Frank Bennett won't be bothering you no more." "Understand?" "You killed him, didn't you?" "No!" "You don't believe me." "Right now, I don't know what to believe." "Believe me when I tell ya I don't want ya to move out." "Finally." "Thanks, I've been out here all day." "Excuse me." "I was waiting for that space." " Yeah?" "Tough!" " Face it, lady, we're younger and faster." "Towanda." "Ha-ha-ha-ha!" "Yeah!" "Whooo!" "Towanda!" "Yes, ma'am." "Whoooo!" " Help, someone!" " What are you doing?" "Are you crazy?" "Face it, girls." "I'm older, and I have more insurance." "I never get mad, Mrs. Threadgoode." "Never!" "The way I was raised it was bad manners." "Well, I got mad and it felt terrific." "I felt like I could beat the shit outta all those punks!" "Excuse my language." "just beat 'em to a pulp!" "Beat 'em till they begged for mercy." "Towanda, the avenger!" "After I wipe out all the punks of this world," "I'll take on the wife beaters, like Frank Bennett, and machine gun their genitals." "Towanda will go on the rampage." "I'll put tiny bombs in Penthouse and Playboy... so they'll explode when you open 'em." "I'll ban all fashion models who weigh less than 130 pounds." "I'll give half the military budget to people over 65... and declare wrinkles sexually desirable." "Towanda, righter of wrongs, queen beyond compare!" "How many of them hormones you takin', honey?" "what I can't understand is... how in the hell you can hit someone... six times by accident." "Oh, Ed, don't make such a big deal about it." " What the hell is this?" " A low cholesterol meal." "Happy Valentine's." "My God!" "Are you tryin' to kill me?" "If I was gonna kill ya, I'd use my hands." "I'm worried about my little friend Evelyn." "She said her husband... will just be watching his sports on TV... and she has an urge to hit him in the head with a baseball bat." "Hell, that seems normal to me." " Hi Janeen." " Mm-hmm" "Mrs. Threadgoode, would you like some crudites?" "Thank you, but this raw stuff don't sit good with me." "Mrs. Threadgoode, you have to tell me something." " Did Idgie murder Frank Bennett or not?" " Hold your horses, honey." "Where were we?" "You didn't kill Ed, did ya?" " Not yet." " Oh, good." "Anyway, five years had passed since Frank Bennett disappeared." "And Smokey Lonesome been missin' ever since that same terrible night." "I member the day when he showed up again." "My God, son." "You're the spittin' image of Ruth." "Buddy Threadgood, Jr." "Nice to meet you, sir." "Well, sir, Smokey Lonesome." "Curtis Smoote was making one of his visits to Whistle Stop, Alabama, still hunting' and peckin' for any scrap of evidence... about Frank Bennett's whereabouts." "Who wants to begin?" "Oh, I do." " I do, Miss Ruth." " Thank you." "We'll begin on page five." "Life has a funny way of working things out." "Well, hey there!" " Smokey!" " Idgie?" "Smokey Lonesome!" "If it isn't old home week." " How are you?" " Well, I'm rattlin' but I'm rollin'." " What brings you to these parts?" " Smell of good cookin'." "Hey, Smokey." " Sipsey." " Let me fix you some lunch." "You know just about everybody except Curtis Smoote." "He's the officer from over at Valdosta, Georgia." "He's been lookin' for the same man for almost 5 years." "Very stubborn fella." "He loves our barbecue." "Mommy!" "Mommy!" "Buddy." "Everybody outta the way." "Give him here." "Let him go." "I've got him." "Come on." "You're gonna be all right." "Open the door!" "Put him in the car." "It's all right, honey" "I can understand... having a funeral for an arm." "I just don't know why she insists on callin' him "Stump."?" "She say everybody else gonna be callin' him that... so we might just as well be the first." "Okay, ice cream and cake for everybody." "Go on." "My daddy always used to say there was a separate God for children." "The good Lord was watchin' over stump that day." "But then it started to rain that month." "It rained and rained and it ﬂooded parts of Whistle Stop." "That's why Grady's deputies stumbled on to Frank Bennett's pickup truck, and I just knew Idgie'd never get out of this mess." "Now, you in or out?" "Remember, I didn't take any cards." "Look at me and let me see your face." "Idgie, I have to talk to you." "You're bluffin'." "Why don't you sit in?" "I'll deal you a new hand." "Gladys won't mind." "In private, Idgie." "Excuse us, Ruth." " A-ha." " I'm just tryin' to teach you not to fall for any tricks." "You're doin' a great job." "What's your hurry?" "And what is so important?" "What's that?" "Somebody found Frank Bennett's truck in the river." "What's that got to do with me?" "Officially, you and Big George are under arrest for murder." "You're in my custody until tomorrow." "I'm supposed to take you to Georgia first thing in the morning." "Unless, of course" "Well, some people have been known to pack up... and sneak out of town in the middle of the night." "What about Big George?" "Well, the way I figure it, they'd be satisfied if they had him." "Idgie." "this is serious." "We're talkin' murder of a white man." "Someone's gonna have to pay." "Nobody wants to hang a woman." "No deal." "Idgie, I know how you feel about Big George." "Hell, we all do." "But these just the facts of life." "I can't do that." "Take me to jail if you have to." "Well, that's what I thought you'd say... 'cause you're absolutely, unconditionally, positively the most stubborn person I've known in my life." "Idgie and Big George went to the county jail in Valdosta... to await trial for the murder of Frank Bennett." "They didn't have to wait too long." " Did you know Frank Bennett?" " No, sir." "You mean, you never met the man..." " whose wife, Ruth, is your business partner?" " That's right." "You never threatened to kill Frank Bennett at his home... in front of his hired man in June of 1932?" " The same Frank Bennett you did not know." " Oh, that was me, all right." "I thought you wanted to know if we'd ever met..." "and the answer is no." "Um, I threatened to kill him, but we were never, what you might say properly introduced." "Is it not true that in September of 1932 you came to Valdosta... and took Frank Bennett's wife and child back to Alabama with you?" "Um...just the wife." "The child came later." " How much later?" " The usual." "Nine months." "I suggest that you bribed... this poor, weak woman with promises of liquor and money, and she lost control of her senses momentarily." "When her husband came back to get her and take her home, you and your colored man murdered him in cold blood." "No, sir." "Well, where were you on the night of September 30, 1933?" "I was at the town hall doing a show." " And after that?" " I was at my mother's house." "Oh, yeah?" "Who was with you?" " Just Big George and myself" " What about your mother?" "Can she confirm that?" "No, sir." "She died a year ago." "I'm sorry to hear that." "But do you expect 12 intelligent men to believe you, although one witness is dead and the other is a colored man, known to be a worthless, no-good, lying nigger?" "You expect these men to take your word for it... just because you say so?" "That's right, you gump-faced, blown-up, baboon-assed bastard!" "One more outburst like that... and I'll hold you in contempt of court." "You understand?" "Yes, sir." " Oh, Lord." " Next witness." "Did you know that you were pregnant'... at the time you left Valdosta?" "Yes." "And yet, you tell us ave-rand over... that you went with this woman... willingly?" "Yes." "I wouldn't raise my child with Frank Bennett." "But why?" " Did this woman promise you money?" " No." "A bigger home?" "No." "No." "Then tell us, Mrs. Bennett, why would a respectable Christian woman..." " go anywhere with this Idgie Threadgoode..." " I object." "Whose reputation is known far and wide..." "As a notorious Afar and drunkard?" " Objection!" " Sustained!" "Why did you leave... with Idgie Threadgoode that day?" "Answer the question, Mrs. Bennett." "Because she" "She's the best friend I ever had, and I love her." "Thank you, Mrs. Bennett." "That will be all." "The defense calls as its last witness... the Rev. Herbert Scroggins." "Place your right hand on the Bible, please." "I brought my own, if you don't mind." "You swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth?" "I do." "You have information about the whereabouts... of Idgie Threadgoode and her colored man, known as Big George, on the night of September 30, 1933?" "Yes, sir, I do." "It has been suggested here... that she and her colored man were at her mother's house." " Can you confirm that?" " No, sir." "That is a lie." "Oh, shit." "It has been my habit to write all the dates..." "Of the activities of the church in my Bible." "I show that the night of September 30, 1933... was the start of our annual revival... down at the Baptist campground." "Sister Threadgoode was there... along with her hired man, George Pullman, who was in charge of the barbecue as he has been..." " for the last ten years." " Objection." "That doesn't mean anything." "Murder could've taken place any time the next couple of clays." " Have you ever been to one of our revivals, sir?" " Well, no." "Do you attend church regularly, sir?" "'Course I do." "Good." "Well, maybe if you attended one of our revivals, you'd know they last three days... and three nights, Your Honor." "Approach the bench." "Percy, it don't look like you got a case at all." "In the first place, there's no body." "Second, we got us a preacher nobody's gonna dispute." " But, Your Honor" " I'm tellin' you." "What you got is a lot of nothing." "I say Frank Bennett got himself drunk, drove into the river and was long ago eaten up... and I don't give a good goddamn!" "What we got here is a case of accidental death." "Case dismissed." "Whoo!" "See you in church, Sister?" "Reverend." "I can't believe he actually swore on a Bible." "Well, not really." "If that judge had looked closer, he'd have seen it was really a copy of Moby Dick." " But why did he do it?" " For the sheer joy of seeing you in church again... which I suggested to him might be your penance." " You didn't promise him, did you?" " Yes, ma'am, I did." "And I never break my word." "If I live 1,000 years, I will never forgive you." "I don't know what's worse, church or jail." "There now." "Don't you look pretty?" "Oh, yes, honey." "You'll have me lookin' like Ginger Rogers before you're done." "Don't let Mr. Dunaway see me." "He's liable to go wild." "I'm glad to see you're in a good mood." "You've slimmed down quite a bit in the last few weeks." "I'm just so happy Big George and Idgie got off." "I would have killed Frank Bennett if I could've." "Did anybody really think she did it?" "Some said yes, some said no." "'Course the only one who really knew was Frank Bennett." "And you know what they say." "Dead men tell no tales." "Towanda-a-a!" "Evelyn, what in the hell are you doing?" "I need some light and air." "Why don't you take one of your walks or your jog... or whatever it is you do?" "There's no dinner either!" "Ed, you have any idea why I've been goin' to all these classes?" " No." " I've been trying to save our marriage." "What's the point of my trying'... if you're gonna sit on your butt drinking beer... and watching baseball, basketball, football... bowling and hockey and golf... and Challenge of the Gladiators?" "Mrs. Couch, I'm Sue, Mrs. Otis' daughter-in-law." "How are you?" "I've heard about you from Mrs. Threadgoode." "She is so sweet." "She's been lookin' after my mother-in-law." "Now, how is Mrs. Otis doin', by the way?" "Much better, thank you." "It takes time getting used to a strange place." "I'm glad to hear it." "Mrs. Threadgoode's been anxious to get home." "Mrs. Couch, Mrs. Threadgoode doesn't have a house anymore." " They tore that down." " What?" "They had to." "It was falling apart, and it was condemned." "Oh, no." " Does she know that?" " No, well, we didn't see any point in telling her." "It would just break her heart, poor old thing" "But I am so glad I got a chance to meet you." "You take care of yourself now." "Bye-bye." "Oh, Evelyn. hey!" "Hey" "Do you like my roses?" "Since I can't get home to look at my own roses..." "I made myself a paper garden." " Got everything but the bugs." " They're lovely." " You been here long?" " Happy birthday!" " Oh!" " I shouldn't have woken you up." "'Course you should've." "Don't you never let me sleep through a visitor's day, honey." " I look forward to them all week." " So do I, Mrs. Threadgoode." "Oh!" "I can't believe you remembered." "You made me fried green tomatoes!" "Mmm!" "They're delicious." " It's your recipe." "Are they cold?" " No." "They're just the way..." " we used to have 'em at the Whistle Stop Cafe." " Mmm!" "You couldn't be sweeter to me if you was my own daughter." "Here's your napkin." "And wait-wait-wait." "Queen, queen." "You know, I don't feel 83." "It sorta slipped up on me." "I never expected to live this long." "'Course, the Lord takes us home when he wants us." "Are you all right?" "I was thinking about Ruth." "After the trial was over," "Everything went back to normal... till that fall when Ruth lost her appetite." "By the time Doc Hadley looked at her, he said the cancer was so bad she only had a couple of weeks." "Well, we moved her to the Threadgoode house... and put her downstairs so she'd be more comfortable." "Sipsey moved in with her and never left her side." "Hold on, baby I'm right here." "Idgie just prayed for a miracle." "Now, listen to me." "Make sure he graduates." "And don't..." "let him come to the funeral." "I don't want him going through that mess." "Would you quit talkin' like that?" "What funeral?" "You're gonna be back on your feet feelin' just fine... in just a few days." "Just you wait." "Oh, what's the matter, son?" "Well, let's go for a walk." "Did you get into a fight?" "I got punched in the nose." "I can't play like everyone else." "Did I ever tell you the story about... the oysters?" "All the millions of 'em just lying around" " And God put sand in one of 'em, and it makes a pearl." " Oh." "Did I ever tell you about Eva's three-legged dog?" "How it never felt sorry for itself... and howl ought to be smarter than a dumb dog and not feel sorry for myself." "You listen to everything I say, don't you?" "You get real mad at me when I don't." "Well, you know about your mama." "She's sick." "Mm-hmm." "See, now is the time for courage." "I guess you already know that there are... angels masqueradin' as people walkin' around this planet, and your mom's the bravest one of those." "Come here." "Mama, I can hit!" "You should see me." "Idgie, she hit me in the back with a curveball." "I didn't duck, and I hardly cried." "She hit you?" "Well, she did that to me once too, but I think I did cry." "Mama, I'm sorry if you're sad." "Well, give me a big kiss then, and I'll never be sad again." "And you best not be sad neither." "You understand?" "You promise?" "Promise." "Attaboy." "You go and wash up." "Sweet baby." "You two be alone now." "Hey, girl." "No." "That's nice." "Will you do one thing for me?" " Yeah, anything." " Be good to yourself." "Even... settle down if you can find someone... who can beat you in poker." "There's so many things I want to say to you." "No." "I love your stories." "Tell me a story, Idgie." "Oh, God." "Go on, you old' bee charmer." "Tell me a good tall tale." "Tell me the one about the lake." " What lake?" " The one..." "that used to be here." "Oh." "Well, that was just a lie." "I know that, fool." "Tell me anyway." "Tell me the story." "Well... one time... there was this lake." "And, uh, it was right outside of town." "We used to go fishin' and swimmin' and canoeing' in it." "And see, one November... this big ﬂock of ducks... came in and landed on that lake and, uh, and then the temperature dropped so fast that the lake just froze right there." "And the, uh, the ducks, they... ﬂew off, you see, and took that lake with 'em." "And, uh." "Now they say that lake is somewhere over in Georgia." "Can you imagine?" "It's all right, honey." "Let her go." "Let her go." "You know, Miss Ruth was a lady." "And a lady always knows... when to leave." "When I think on our departed sister, Ruth Jamison," "I'm reminded of our Lord's Sermon on the Mount... and how his teachings" "It's funny how strong Ruth affected everyone." "even Smokey Lonesome." "When he died a few years back... he had one possession on him," "A picture of Ruth." "He was in love with her from the first time he saw her." "We all were." "I shouldn't a-told you this." "I hate death." "It scares me so." "Death is nothin' to be afraid of!" "Look at me." "I'm at the jumping'-off place, and I ain't afraid one bit." "Oh, Ninny, you're so brave." "Ruth and Idgie were brave, not me." "I wouldn't be afraid of death if I was you." "I'd be more afraid of driving in rush-hour traffic." "Hi, honey." "Look what I got you." "Ah..." "Ed, how sweet!" " Lilies!" "My favorite." " Yeah." "I know." "Sometimes I even amaze myself." " What's the occasion?" " Oh, honey, I just... feel sorry about the past few months." "I don't know what you're really up to and what's going on with you, but I guess I could've been more helpful with your job and everything, you know." "Well, why are you... puttin' up this wall where you just tore one down?" "Well..." "I changed my mind." "I don't mean to seem dense or anything," " but what's changed?" " The air and the light." " Ed" " Hmm?" "You remember how you used to tell me... you always wanted two women in your house?" "Oh, God." "Yeah." "Well... what if I was the younger of the two?" "I don't believe I get your drift." "I want something more than I've ever wanted anything before." "I want to bring Mrs. Threadgoode... to our home." "I want her to live here with us." "I want to give her the love she's given me." "You're kiddin' me, aren't you?" "I'm absolutely serious." "That's why I'm puttin' the wall to Kyle's room back up." "Well, honey, this isn't something you're just go and do." "I mean, she's an old woman." "What if she got sick?" "Who's gonna take care of her?" "I will!" "I can't leave her in that place." "She's not a stray cat." "Hell, she isn't even family." " She's family to me." " Now, Evelyn." "Evelyn?" "Honey?" "Ah, look... have you mentioned this harebrained idea to her?" " Not yet." " Well, good!" "Then we'll just pretend it never happened." "I'm making my own money." "I'll pay for everything." "You don't have to do a thing." "Evelyn... it's never gonna happen." "So just forget about it." "Don't you ever say "never" to me." "Someone helped put a mirror up in front of my face, and I didn't like what I saw one bit." "You know what I did?" "I changed." "And that someone..." "was Mrs. Threadgoode." "She needs my love and care, and I'm gonna give it to her." "If you'll excuse me, I have to go to the gym." "And if you won't listen to reason... there's always Towanda." "Hey, Nin" "What are you doing?" "Those are her things, Mrs. Threadgoode's things!" " What are you doing in here?" "Where's Mrs. Threadgoode?" " Who?" "Mrs. Threadgoode!" "The woman who lives here." "Are you deaf?" "I'm sorry, miss." "All they told me... was that the woman who lived in here died this morning." "Oh. my God!" "Wha" " What are you sayin'?" "She died early this morning." "They were shorthanded so they asked me to take all this stuff down." "That?" "all I know." "Stop that!" "What is the matter with you people?" "Can't you wait a goddamn day, for Chrissake?" "Do you have no respect?" "These are her things!" "I'm sorry, but they told me to get this room ready for another patient." "She may be just another patient to you," " but she was my friend, and I loved her." " I'm sorry." "I'm just following orders." " What is going on?" " Why didn't you call me?" " You could've called me before you sent that idiot" " I'm sorry." "It never occurred to me that you would take it this hard." " I didn't even get to tell her good-bye." " Oh, I know." "These things are difficult, but she died peacefully in her sleep." "To tell you the truth, I thought you'd be happy for Mrs. Threadgoode." " Happy?" " Why, yes!" "This is what she wanted." "What?" "To be dead?" "No, to go home." "You just missed her." "She left in a yellow cab about a half hour ago." "I don't understand." "What?" "A cab?" "She said there wasn't no reason for her to stay now that Mrs. Otis had died." "Mrs..." "Otis is dead?" "Oh, Mrs. Otis died." "Mrs. Otis died!" "Mrs. Otis!" "Oh, God!" "Not that..." "I'm glad that Mrs. Otis died, it's just" "Oh, God." "I've gotta stop her." "Hey, Evelyn, somebody stole my house." "It was right here when I left." "Unless" " Oh, Evelyn, you don't reckon I'm crazy, do you?" " It was here when I left." " No, honey, you're not crazy." "This is the place." "Why would anyone want to steal an old lady's home?" "Wasn't worth nothin'." "Oh, honey, nobody stole it." "They had to tear it down." "It was condemned." "I'm sorry." "I shoulda told you." "Well, somebody shoulda told me." " I'm old." "I'm not a child." " I'm sorry." "My husband Cleo and I lived in this house... for more than 40 years." "Now, it's... it's gone." "83 years worth of livin' and all that's left of me... is what's in this box, a bunch of old cards and pictures." "Come on." "I'll take you home." "This is my home!" "And now it's gone." "And Mrs. Otis is gone." "I..." "I don't quite know what to do." "This is the first time I can remember when I don't have a soul to look after." "You can come look after me and Ed." "Oh, you're sweet, but I think you're doin' just fine on your own." "Don't you know you'd be like a gift for us?" "You're the reason I get up every morning... and that Mary Kay's havin' such a good year... and I don't look like some blob from a horror movie." "Well, with a little help from Idgie and Ruth." "Come on." "I've got your room all ready." "What does Ed say about all this?" "He'll learn to love it." "Did I ever tell you that Mrs. Otis was Sipsey's baby sister?" " No, ma'am." " Yes, she was." "Mrs. Otis was with Sipsey and me the night Sipsey died." "Sipsey told me a story that night I've never told a living soul, Evelyn." "A story about what really happened..." "The night Frank Bennett disappeared" " Hey there!" " You got to come quick." " The show has hardly begun." " You got to come quick." "You hear me?" " Run, get help!" "Run, quick!" " Where's the baby?" "Never mind." "Excuse me, sir." "I don't believe you should be goin' anywhere with Ruth's baby." "Like I said, you ain't goin' nowhere." "Damn, you a thickheaded son-of-a-bitch, ain't you?" "I told you... you ain't goin' nowheres with Miss Ruth's baby." "Come on, angel." "Come on." "Come on, sweetheart." "It's all right." "Come on." "It's all right, baby." "it was self-defense." "I don't know why any white jury would care why I did it." " Well, I saw it, and I can testify." " Excuse me here." "I don't mean no offense here, but I don't know who's less likely to convince a jury, my mama..." "or Mr. Smokey." "No offense taken." "You're a good man, Mr. Smokey." " You did good." " The sun's almost up." " George?" " Mm-hmm?" "I think... it's hog-boiling time." "No, ma'am." "It ain't cold enough." "It's hog-boiling time." "Big George?" " Uh-huh?" " When is that barbecue gonna be ready?" "It's gonna be ready any time now." "Smells so damn good I just can't wait to get me some." " Now, don't you forget to call me when that's ready." " All right." "Here you go." " Miss Idgie?" "Smokey left town." " Yeah?" "I thought it'd be best under the circumstances." "He asked that you tell Ruth good-bye." "Shame he had to go." "Hold on!" "I'm comin'." " What you want?" " We want some barbecue." "Not today you don't." "Go on." "Why, this is about the best barbecue I ever ate!" "The secret's in the sauce." "Sipsey?" "My God!" "That frying' pan did more than fry chicken that night." "Did Idgie really barbecue Frank Bennett?" "Are you pullin' my leg?" "Secret's in the sauce, or so I've been told." "Now you know why Idgie had to go on trial." "She knew the law would never believe Sipsey." "No!" "Sipsey or Big George or anyone else of color... would've been hangin' from the nearest tree." "To this day, I'm still not sure... whether Ruth ever believed... that Idgie didn't kill Frank Bennett." "Truth's a funny thing sometimes." " I feel better now." " Good." "I feel better 'cause all these people'll live... as long as you remember 'em." "You reminded me... about what the most important thing in life is." " Do you know what I think it is?" " No, ma'am." "Friends." "Best friends." "Oh." "Ninny!" "Look." "Oh!" "Idgie?" " Idgie's alive?" " Oh, yes!" "She's still out and about Charmin' bees and selling honey." "Sometimes I think I catch a glimpse of her." "Maybe we'll see her today." "Maybe." "Let's go." "After Ruth died and the railroad stopped running', the cafe shut down, and everybody just scattered to the winds." "It was never more than just a little knockabout place." "But now that I look back on it, when that cafe closed... the heart of the town just stopped beating." "It's funny how a little place like this... brought so"