"Sam, it's Cheers." "It's a romantic bar." "As many people fall in love here as get sick." "Sam and Diane will get more familiar." "I liked the lift part." "Diane and Sam have a relationship." "That's not giving away much." "It's obvious from the last two shows." "And it's very hot." "Norm is out of work." " Afternoon, everybody." " Norm!" "I've gotten a little dumber, I think, if truth be known." "It's not like I'm stupid, is it?" "Coach will remain sweet." "Have an accident, Sam, or are you just glad to see me?" "Carla has a baby." "I tried to hold out before they left." "It was my last shot at a pity tip." "John Ratzenberger's still a mailman." "They've asked me to test drive a new postal vehicle." "What else?" "That's about it." "The interesting thing is that each week we find new ways to go." "It is like having a relationship." "We don't plan too much ahead." "We get them in interesting situations, but a lot of the time when the scripts hit the table, the situation from the previous week has affected this situation, so the relationship changes, the dynamic changes, so the relationship goes a totally different way." "I mean, this show we shot tonight was..." "They got together originally at the end of the show and now we have them somewhat at odds, so it's an interesting process." "The only thing that's left is that you want your physical lust satisfied and that's where I come in." "An emotional contagion takes place when you're seeing the show shot." "Audiences know the characters and situations and respond immediately." "We've seen the contrast." "Early on, when our ratings were so terrible and there was a lack of excitement, we knew what the opposite was." "There's a real nice feeling that we've arrived." "We've been found and now we just continue to build and take advantage of that firm foundation we've laid." "Glen and Les Charles are so funny." "They work so hard." "Jim Burrows was really kind of, of course, the director, and he gave lots of feedback, but those guys..." "They would sit there and just stew over everything." "They laughed, of course, when things were working." "But I remember back to looking at Glen and Les's faces when something was basically working and the audience was loving it and they'd just be there, really pondering whether it was exactly right." "Sometimes they'd throw it out and start all over again." "It was pretty impressive." "A great work ethic." "How do you cheer someone up with six months to live?" "I'll tell 'em I have five." "Chemistry, I think, begins with the writer, really." "When you write interesting characters, you'll get chemistry with good actors." "I guess it won't kill me to come out and say... congratulations" "Thank you, Carla." "I never ad-libbed one line." "Maybe one, but I wouldn't remember it." "I don't remember anything." "But we kept to the script." "We rarely, if ever, maybe in rehearsal, for a joke, would ad-lib and make the writers laugh." "But they would never include it because we said it and they didn't." "It was very proprietary." "They owned the words and we said them." "And that's fine with me, because, you know, unlike George, say," "I don't come from Second City and improv comedy and that scares me." "I think other people write better than I do." " Who would use a line like that?" " Not me." "One reason the show stayed fresh was they created great characters." "They hired interesting individuals that were different from each other." "The actors had different styles and were different people and came with their own baggage." "Everybody was in a really..." "It became more evident as the years went on that each person was highly individual." "In this play, Andrew Schroeder, my discovery, will act the role of Othello." "Shelley has comedy chops." "I'm going to make a funny face." "I don't think it will help, but go ahead." "We had the same background at Second City in Chicago." "She knew that she had the best-written woman's role in a sitcom in a long time." "Fitzgerald, Faulkner, they all virtually drank themselves to death." "So can I get you another round?" "She made the most of every joke." "I used to see her relish those slam-dunk jokes." "It was great." "I said I wouldn't call you stupid while we were being intimate." "I loved Ted." "I only got to kiss him once." "Darn it." "But who doesn't love Ted?" "Ted's a smoothy." "You'd do a lot better for yourself if you'd stop meddling in other people's sex lives and concentrated on mine." "When you have somebody like Ted who understands what's funny about a moment, it just kicks it up a notch." "The kind of guy who can't pass a mirror without checking himself out." "Thinks he's God's gift to women." "Rhea is not like Carla." "I believe you are a big dink." "I really wanted the role." "First of all, I thought those guys were brilliant." "I thought they were great from "Taxi" and I read the script and I loved it." "It was obviously such a great character to get to be." "This mean, miserable..." "It's always fun to be mean." "What a scuzzy, egotistical, greasy, rotten sewer rat." "There's no bitterness." "You know." "I mean, she is sexy." "Thank you for letting Normie go." "He's such an animal." "George Wendt is exactly like Norm." "I'm dragging my thirst behind me." "We had a ton of fun." "They called me in to audition for a guest role." "My agent said, "It's a really small role, but you know these guys" ""and I think you ought to do them a favour and go on in. "" "So I went in and the role actually had one line, one word, really. "Beer"." " Afternoon, everybody." " Norm!" "It's pretty amazing how recognisable I am." "As a matter of fact, I get recognised from behind and that's not a fat-butt joke." "How did he die, some mysterious ailment turns your flesh to cardboard?" "The back of my head and this shoulder." "Over the shoulder on Ted for all those years." "People can bust me from behind, three lanes over on the freeway at night." "They come waving by." "It's amazing." "Sam, telephone call!" "I'll say you're breaking in a new waitress." "Everyone said, "You're doing great work." "The show's wonderful." "Keep it up." ""Don't worry." "You're doing great stuff. "" "The media found us." "The critics loved us." "So we, as actors, were always buoyed up." "It was a great space to be in, because it didn't impair our work." "We just assumed we were a hit." "We were always going to be on." "We were having a great time." "Step back." "This thing will sheer your knee caps off." "Grant Tinker had just been voted in to save NBC and he had this mandate to put on what he perceived to be quality programming and leave it till the audience found it and we benefited from that philosophy." "Don't you want to spend your nights with a woman who's fulfilled, independent, self-actualised?" "Well, it's worth a shot." "Have you got her number?" "Ever hear of the lone wolf, Carla?" "The lone wolf." "C'est moi." "John Ratzenberger, Ratzy, turned into my comedy partner, actually." "I didn't see it coming, but we'll be forever joined at the hip, I suppose." "Remember when you thought I was drinking too much and I really ought to stop?" " As a friend, I appreciated that." " Yeah, you didn't stop, Norm." "I decided you were wrong, but er..." "You couldn't ask for a better guy to be joined with." "He's a real man's man and a real free thinker and a lot of fun." "I never thought I'd say this about a man, but Coach could be a good postal carrier." "Dedication and single-mindedness." "The inability to recognise the word "fragile"." " It's French." " What does it mean?" "Because of the idiomatic peculiarities, it can't be translated into English..." "I wonder who she's talking about, Norm." "He's an intellectual pit bull." "If he senses fear, he'll attack." "He'll reduce you to a pile of blubbering flesh." "Like all artists, the man is a homosexual." "You think everybody who's a bit different is gay." "I've given you the benefit of the doubt." "You're not by any chance Cliff Clavin?" "Sure am." "You heard of me?" "Your name is kind of a symbol around our branch office." "Is that right?" "Yeah." "Just the other day, I messed up, you know, and my supervisor told me to get my head out of my Clavin." "As you see, the roots of physical aggression in the male is found in the old DNA molecule." "Hold onto your hat, too, because the very letters DNA are an acronym for the words Dames Are Not Aggressive." "Statistics show that 33% of the time, a guy carrying a gun will not use it." " So?" " If he's shot two today, you're in luck." "Let's talk about the gas turbine engine for a while." "You misspelt Massachusetts, first of all." "On the face of it, this is all prima-facie non corpus-interuptus." "So I'm not a pretty boy." "I have impossibly high standards for a woman." "She has to like you." "What a pathetic display." "I'm ashamed God made me a man." "I guess I should have known." "She said she invented all those things it takes years to learn." "Man was not made to be monogamous." "It's an artificial, unnatural phenomenon imposed from without." "The male can never have enough women." "Or in your case, any." "Well, early cavemen went out to hunt for food that graced their simple table." "Women stayed in the cave and developed art, culture." "You know what they say." "Healthy body, healthy mind." "Pick one you got a good shot at." "Men, down through the centuries, have always been hunters and adventurers." "Cogito, it is not in man's nature to sit alone and be passive and docile." " It doesn't seem fair." " What?" "That I have so much knowledge when there are people who go to bed stupid." "You slime!" "You are a total scuzzball." "You're not fit to live with sewer rats." "She was the first person cast." "They'd seen her in a play about a baseball fan." "And they knew Danny really well, Jimmy, Les and Glen." "But I think she was cast before any of us." "I know she was." " This is obviously not..." " Put it on or I'll tear off your clothes." "You have been cruising on your looks too long." " I won't fight you." " Let's go." "I'm warding off evil spirits." "If you weren't so stupid, you'd do the same." "Damn!" "Tonight the three of us joined together and were able to make another human being eat his liver." "Life, I love you!" "He touches me and I'm a woman." "A total, quivering woman." "The name of the game is intimidation." "Real men have done it for centuries." "And it can work for guys like you, too." "I'm too desirable." "I'm a vermin magnet." " Could we get some coffee?" " Get real." "I don't love that rat and I never did!" "So what's your problem, droopy drawers?" "Is this a bad time to ask you for a favour?" "For you, there's no good time." " Hank?" " Yeah." "How do you do?" "Shut up and answer a few questions." "Before I do you a favour, I'd rather be dragged around town by my tongue." "The women of America..." "Come on." "You know my philosophy." "If you can't say something nice, say it about Diane." "You get thirty seconds." "If you blow it, I'll send you out and your face stays here." "Diane's mouth has sprung a leak again." "Let's kill her!" "Let go." "Carla." "Carla, please." "Please, Carla." "Let me go." "Hey." "Would you watch it?" "I'm in a family way here." "The kid's going to be a swimmer." "Old widows and spinsters get together and play connect the liver spots." "Listen up!" "I'm in the worst mood of my entire life!" "Watch out, don't bug me and stay out of my way." "This is the only warning you get." "Come on." "Turn that frown upside down." "He won't budge." "I'm going to be pregnant for the rest of my life." "Just like it said in the yearbook." "This is Diane!" "She's smart!" "It's remarkable when you look at the re-runs and the first year or two." "She was just spectacular." ""We ran together." ""Spring set the pace through the wild heather's bloom... "" "I'll have you know that when I was in high school," "I was voted the girl most likely to marry into old money." ""'A bug, ' you say, crushing it." ""I smiled, but just a little. "" "You know what I always say?" "Life is like a Chinese banquet." "Between Peking duck and sweet and sour fish, you expect chicken feed soup." "You all think I'm nothing but a hothouse orchid, unequipped to survive in anything but a rarefied atmosphere," "I'll have you know, there's weed in me." "Love can be a rebirth for any man and woman." " I feel better about that." " Wasn't it Dante who said..." "Fitzgerald, Faulkner, they all virtually drank themselves to death." "So can I get you another round?" "I am an excellent judge of character." "And I say she's loose." "That little smut-peddler?" "How would we manage without Carla's wit?" "Carla, how do you manage?" "I'm proud of us." "Women have taken our place in society as never before, working, doing, rising, on merit, through the ranks." "We are taking our place alongside and, in many cases, above men." "Once exploited, now we are equal." "Shake it up." "I'm dry over here!" "Excuse me." "Come on!" "Quit it!" "I mean it, Heather!" "There's a theory that late-born babies are more intelligent." "I was born late." " So was I." " It's just a theory." "That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard." "I thought you said you weren't going to call me stupid now that we're intimate." "I said I wouldn't call you stupid while we were being intimate." " Is it in foreign tongue?" " No, it's English." "In your case, that qualifies." "Sam is a heartless, mindless cretin and he disagrees." "You are an idiot." "That is the most avaricious, rapacious thing you have ever done." "I hate you with the white-hot intensity of 1,000 suns." "You have sunk so low, you would need a ladder to kiss a snake's hiney." "I'd rather be staked out on an ant hill naked." "Maggots." "It stirred my ire just watching that bait bucket." "Men are beginning to disgust me." "Even more than before." "What?" "Do you know what the difference is between you and a fat-brain ass?" "The fat-brain ass would." "You see how, if you start telling the truth right away..." "Well, you've made my life a living hell." "I didn't want you to think I was easy." "Fine gourmet dining is truly one of the greatest pleasures of life." "Coach, do you want to rocket those Cheese Doodles down here?" "We have reservations for 8:30 at Maison Robert." "Good." "I tell you, I've been looking forward to this weekend." "Where?" " Will it be the three of us?" " Hey, you and me both, honey." "Coach, rocket those Cheez Doodles down here." "They should have had the funeral in Boston." "This is where his pals are." "I let her say the line, didn't I?" "Where are we?" "Would you stop?" "Let's all stop." "What is the line?" "If you ever come back, put a bag over your head!" "A gunny sack will cover more." "Something not making progress is you and me." "Well, we can change..." "I'm glad we had Coach along." "I've been on that road so long, they..." "I'll tell you what..." "Sam, we need more red wine." "All right." "OK." "Listen." "What do I have to say?" " Sam..." " Hold it." " Yeah." " Sam, we need..." "You're drinking a lot of wine!" " Stand by." " Are we starting with wine?" "The only line I know." "Stand by." "Sam, we need more red wine." "These are very severe accusations." "I hope you have something that will back this up in law..." "I'm afraid they'll take a gentle, guileless guy like..." "I did it right the first time, right?" "Hutch..." "Gee, I wish..." "Once again." "English, Bonus"