"*I love to live alone* *'cause I'm in my cleaning zone*" "Gabi, hi!" "How are you?" "How's Switzerland?" "Have you learned how to yodel yet?" "You ask me that every week and the answer is still no-de-lay-hee-hoo!" "Gets me every time." "Wait a minute." "It's not Sunday night." "Why are you calling me now?" "I just missed ya." "How did flambe week go?" "Fla-mazing." "I learned how to make a peppercorn steak with brandy, how to burn down a restaurant, how to make Crepe Suzette..." "Wait, wait." "Back up." "So, the secret is actually lemon zest..." "Back it up a little more." "Something about burning a restaurant down?" "Yeah." "There may have been a teeny-tiny major fire." "The French alcohol that I was using was a little higher proof than I realized." "I blame the metric system." "Did they?" "No, they blamed me." "Oh, you poor thing." "What are you gonna do?" "Come home?" "Oh, my god!" "You're here!" "They kicked me out." "Aw, you okay?" "No-de-lay-hee-hoo!" "Well, overall, it sounds like you had a great time." "But don't you think we should talk about the elephant in the room?" "Yes, Sofia, listen, I'm going to get a job and I'm going to be able to pay rent." " I promise." " No, I was talking about Josh." "Oh, that elephant." "So, what's your plan?" "It's funny you should ask." "I was gonna go to his place straight from the airport," "I was going to look him right in the eye and say," ""The way that I left was hurtful and horrible and I am so, so sorry." "Can you ever forgive me?"" " Well, why didn't you?" " I got scared." "When I was in Switzerland, I tried reaching out." "I called him and I texted him." "But then I felt like I should just leave him alone." "Why?" "'Cause he wrote back, "Leave me alone."" "But now that I'm home, I really want to see him." "But why?" "Because you feel guilty?" "Because you want to apologize?" "You still have feelings for him?" "Yes, yes, and I don't know." "Oh, my god!" "Do you think that I subconsciously burnt down that restaurant so that I could come home early and see him?" "No!" "And that is what you will tell the police and everyone." "I still can't believe you're controlling that with your phone." "Yeah." "With my app, you can control it with any phone." "It's kind of like a universal TV remote, but for drones." "Two things that everyone loves." "Drones and people always on their phones." "I want to buy it." "Like I told you before, the app isn't for sale." "Well, here's something new." "How about I buy your whole company?" "Not interested." " I'll give you half a billion dollars." " Interested." "Yolanda, if Josh sells his company to Kal," "I will be the publicist to one of the richest men in San Francisco." "And I'll be washing the underpants of one of the richest men in San Francisco." "Yours sounds better." "Josh is about to hit it big and his whole team will share the glory." "Except you." "You're new." "No one cares about you." "Who hurt you?" "I'll get it!" "This is the best day ever." "Hi!" "Oh, my god!" "It returned!" "Go away!" "Please, Elliot." "I just need to talk to Josh." "No!" "You will never set foot in this house again..." "Oh, my damn, Gabi!" "Come on in!" "No, Yolanda!" "I forbid it." "Forbid this." " Gabi?" " Hey, Josh." "Is it me or did it just get awkward in here?" "You're back early." "Yeah, about that." "Listen, I kinda wanted to talk to you about something." "Elliot, maybe we shouldn't stand here and watch this." "You're right." "Let's stand over there." "If this is about your job," "I actually hired a new chef." "Yeah, I know, Yolanda told me." "Here she is." "Adriana." "This is Gabi, my ex-- chef-- ex-chef." "Oh, you're Gabi." "Or as Elliot calls you," ""She who must not be named."" " Pleased to meet you." " Very nice to meet you." "So, is now a good time for us to" "Never!" "He doesn't want to talk to you!" "Is that true, Josh?" "Do you not want to talk to me?" "Of course he wants to talk to you!" "He's got a lot of feelings he needs to let out!" "Because I have feelings that I need to let out, too." "Starting with I'm sorry." "You can save your apology!" "He has moved on!" "The hell he has!" "Yolanda, stay out of it!" "Stop!" "You!" "You!" "Out!" "Someone's wound a little tight!" "Look, Elliot's right." "You don't need to apologize to me." "I've moved on." "Everything's cool." "In case you were wondering, a seagull ate your dessert, not me." "I better be off." "Kal, this is my former chef Gabi." "She just got back from a really fancy apprenticeship in Switzerland." "Ooh, an apprenticeship in Europe." "You must be good." "I'm looking for a chef." "Are you interested?" " Excuse me?" " Excuse me?" "I'm sorry." "We haven't been properly introduced." "I just moved in next door." "I'm kal." "I'm a billionaire." "Next door?" "Listen, Josh, the last thing I want to do is make you feel awkward." "What?" "Me?" "No." "You!" "Awkward!" "Me?" "What?" "Look, we had a little thing before she left." "Actually, we didn't." "We almost did." "Well, I really don't want to get into the middle of a thing." "There was no thing." "Did you not just hear me?" "No thing happened." "And since there was no thing, there's nothing to get in the middle of." "Just a bunch of-- air." "So, you're cool if I take the job?" "Cool!" "Me!" "What?" "Yes!" "Cool!" "Me!" "Yeah!" "Job." "Take." " You're sure?" " I mean, is no one hearing what I'm saying?" "Is this thing on?" "Take the job." "Okay." "I guess I'll take it." "Thank you." "Great!" "Can you start right away?" "I've got a very important business dinner tomorrow night," "And I really have to impress the guy." "Oh, who's the guy?" "Me." "I still can't believe it." "Only you would get a job that just so happens to be across the hall from the elephant." "I know!" "But I asked the elephant a hundred times and he said he was cool with it." "So what am I supposed to do?" "I need a job." "Well, on that note, take a seat." "Sofia, I don't need one of your pep talks that's actually a lecture." "Oh!" "But you do." "This new job is a fresh start." "SO, TO HELP YOU STAY ON TRACK," "I've put together a little list of "dos and don'ts"." ""Do act professional." ""Don't have sex with your boss." ""Do wear pants." "Don't take them off."" "Sofia, I'm not gonna sleep with" ""Do prepare a delicious dinner tonight for Kal and Josh." ""Don't engage with Josh." "Don't look at him." "Don't talk about the past." "Don't talk about the future."" " But what if" " Don't." " But what if he" " Don't." " But what if he" " Don't." "Okay, fine." "You're right, Sofia." "Man, how did I ever make it in switzerland without you?" "You didn't." "You burned down a restaurant." "Oh, my god." "Gabi, this looks amazing." "Well, your place is amazing." "I especially love the piano." "is it a grand?" "oh, it cost way more than that." "Listen, Kal, I just want you to know" "That tonight's dinner with Josh is going to be completely professional." "why wouldn't it be?" "it would be." "That's Josh." "I'm going to go in the other room." "Could you announce me how they do on Downton Abbey?" "Yes." "Okay." "Be professional." "Don't talk about the past." "Don't talk about the future." "We need to talk." "Gabi, this is a really important night." "I know!" "For me, too!" "We finally have a chance to talk." "I'm talking about the deal with Kal." "This is really important to me." "But I know that you're feeling things." "Like annoyed?" "Good." "That's good." "Go on." "Look, I meant what I said yesterday." "I'm cool with you working here, so can you please just act professional?" "Fine!" "Can I get you a glass of wine, sir?" "No, thank you. $500 million deals and alcohol do not mix well." "I was waiting to be announced, but how long can a man hide behind his own door?" "Sorry." "May I please introduce" "The moment passed." " Hello, Josh." " Good to see you, Kal." "Before we get started, there's something personal I wanted to discuss with you." "Sure, what is it?" "All right." "I'll get right down to it." "I'm hot for your chef." "I hope it's not a problem." "Problem?" "Hell no, it's great!" "She's fantastic." "I know we only just met," "But we've got the most amazing connection." "I love it!" "It's fun." "Fun news." "Great!" "I'm going to ask her out as soon as we're finished with dinner." "Okay, the first course is ready." "This looks divine." "Gabi, you're a godsend." "I can't believe you let me steal her away from you." "It's not stealing when she wasn't even working for me." "Gabi, more wine?" " Oh, I thought you" " More wine!" "Gabi, your oyster is perfection." "I'm so glad you like it." "There's plenty more where that came from." "All right!" "You know what?" "I don't need this big fancy dinner." "I've had Gabi's oysters." "Do you have the initial offer for me to sign?" "A man who knows what he wants." "All right." "Let's get down to biz-natch." "Now feel free to take your time and look over" "No." "Blah, blah, blah." "Lots of zeros." "All looks in order." "Signing." "Letter of intent off to the attorney's." "Great doing biz-natch with you." "Cheerio!" "Tut-tut!" "Must be off!" "May I now introduce the second course" "You've never seen downton abbey, have you?" "No." "I'm going to ask her to hang out tonight." "Hey, Kal, guess what?" "I don't care!" "Champagne!" "Like that's going to impress her." "Holy cow, I think it did!" "Is it too soon to go to the bedroom?" "No!" "Wait!" "Adriana?" "Oh, no!" "No, no, no!" "No, no, no!" "Ohh, drone down!" "We have a drone down!" "Thank you!" "Good first day?" "You' will be happy to know, I kept my pants on." "Here's to baby steps." "Kal was great." "I had no problem with Kal." "But when josh showed up for his business dinner, he wouldn't talk to me." "I tried to get him to talk to me, but he just wouldn't." "And then he was all like, "Tut-tut." "Cheerio." "I must be off"." "Why are you looking at me like that?" "It's just-- all your stupid, crazy, drama" "I missed you!" "Come on." "I'm not all stupid, crazy drama." "Gabi, open the door quick!" "Gabi!" "Gabi!" "Gabi!" "I flew a drone into Kal's penthouse and I crashed it and I need you to get it back for me." "I can't believe I thought learning to knit could fill this void." "Okay, what are you talking about?" "Look, gabi, I need you to get that drone back for me." "I could lose $500 million." " Okay, I'll help you." " Great." "Let's go." "If-- if you agree to have a talk when we're done." "A real talk." "A feelings talk." " Do you have the key to Kal's apartment?" " Yes." "Feelings talk it is." "Let's go." "I think the drone is over by the piano." "Okay." "Wait here." "Josh, I got it." "That's a roomba." "A vacuum." "Now would be a good time to tell you," "I don't know what a drone looks like." "It's a quad copter with four rotors." "Four rotors!" "Why didn't you say so?" "What the hell?" "Kal!" "What-- what am I doing in here?" "Is the question you're probably asking." "Gabi, I know you're looking for Josh's drone." "Oh, that's a drone!" "Yep, you caught me." "That's what I'm here for." "But not because he put me up to it." "I'm here completely on my own-- with Josh." "Josh, what the hell is this doing in my apartment?" "Kal, I can explain everything." "The drone's artificial intelligence is too advanced." "This could be the start of a robot uprising." "Cut the crap." "Why are you spying on me?" "Kal, I'm not spying on you." "What's going on out here?" "Adriana?" "I think the question is what's going on in there, sexy robe?" "Oh, I get it." "I knew you were bothered when I asked if I could date your chef." "You were spying on Adriana." "Wait, Kal, you asked Josh if you could date his chef?" "Did you think he meant me chef and not she chef?" "What?" "I know what's going on here." "Listen, he wasn't spying on you." "He was spying on me." "I don't care who he was spying on." "The point is he was spying!" "I need to trust the people that I work with." "The deal is off." "And you, you're fired." " What?" " What?" "But what about my perfect oyster?" "But who's gonna cook for you?" "Actually, I'm going to." "Josh, I'm sorry, I quit." "I'm going to go work for Kal now." "Wait a minute." "You're going to cook for the same guy you're sleeping with?" "Girl, I have a dos and don'ts list for you." "Well, thanks a lot, you just got me fired!" "Yeah, well, you just cost me a $500 million deal!" "Me?" "Me?" "That was you." " That was all you!" " Oh, whatever!" "Okay." "Deal's a deal." "Time to talk." "Okay." "I'm upset." "I think my drone's broken." "And now you know how I feel." "What the hell is the matter with you?" "When I first got back, you said you'd moved on." "You were good." "And now, all of a sudden you're spying on me" "Because you think I'm sleeping with your neighbor?" "What is that all about?" "Do you really want to know what that's all about or are you just gonna jump on another plane when things get too difficult?" "So you are mad." "You pulled the rug out from under me, Gabi!" "You left me like a smiling idiot at Elliot's engagement party!" "I told you I loved you, I kissed you, and I know that meant something to you." " It did." " Then why would you leave me like that?" "Because" "Josh, if I saw you then I wouldn't have been able to go." "When I first left, I kept asking myself how I could leave when we were just getting started." "And what did you come up with?" "Because I couldn't come up with anything." "Being with you would have been too easy." "This is easy?" "Josh." "You would move mountains to make me happy." "And I want to move my own mountains." "Does that make any sense?" "I know what mountains are." "I went to Switzerland because I want to be the next Julia Child." "And if you did everything for me," "Then I would lose my own drive to make that dream come true." "Do you understand that?" "I know what dreams are." "Josh..." "Look, Gabi-- when you left, it was horrible." "I was a mess." "So I threw myself into work-- and-- actually it kinda got me to a place where I almost made $500 million." "So, me leaving was a good thing?" "Yeah." "My accountant thinks you should ruin my life more often." "But, Gabi..." "I can't go through that again." "Josh, I am sorry." "I am really, truly, very, very sorry." "And you for..." "I forgive you, Gabi." "Josh, you did not have to say that." "So, where do we go from here?" "How about we go back to doing what we do best?" " Being friends." " I would love that." "Me, too." " So, we're good?" " We're very good." "Good." "Feelings talk adjourned." "All right." "I got to get out of here." "I gotta get up early and start the job search." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "What?" "I can't believe I'm about to say this." "What?" " Do you want..." " Yes!" " ...your old job back?" " Yes!" "Yes, I do, thank you!" "Thank you!" "Thank you!" "Now I don't have to get up early." "Thanks for the feelings talk." "What are friends for?" " See you tomorrow, chef." " See you tomorrow, boss." "Elliot, I have some news." "The deal with Kal's off." "Damn it!" "All that money!" "Okay, well, I'll just be the publicist to another cutest guy in San Francisco." "I have some other news" "Adriana quit." " Good morning." " No!" "It lives!" "No!"