"Good evening." "Do you believe in ghosts?" "Of course not." "I knew you didn't." "Noise is the mortal enemy of good motion picture making... and television broadcasting." "That is why I hired this particular house." "It is deathly quiet" "Most of the time." "And its reputation for being haunted... keeps away the curious." "The shifting of scenery also seems to be better here." "The human element has been removed." "So, if you would just lean back and relax..." "I'll tell you a little ghost story." "Please don't hesitate to turn out your lights." "I'm sure the warm glow from the picture tube... will be sufficient to melt all your fears of the dark." "But before we view with alarm... allow us to point with pride." "It's Brown Meadow leading by two lengths... from Harry's Rose." "Then Headstrong, then Pretty Polly, and Sabrina." "Then Curly Top, then Healtheon, and Nutmeg falling well behind." "Two furlongs to go." "Hello, Stephen." "Derek." "Have you got something on this race?" "Naturally." "What horse?" "Brown Meadow, the favorite." "But he won't pay anything." "You can't have got better than 3-to-1." "Two and a half, but I've got to win." "I'm in the red nearly £600 here at the Club..." "I've got to report to the Admiral the day after tomorrow." "I'm being called up, you know." "But so am I." "England expects every man to do his duty, and pay his debts." "Come on, Curly Top, come on, let's go, Curly Top." "Let's go!" "Come on!" "...Curly Top, if Lanning could hold the pace." "Yes, it's Curly Top by half a length." "I had £500 on Curly Top." "Well, I'm in £1,000 now." "I had £500 on Curly Top." "No, not really." "Yes." "Listen to that, will you." "Latimer had £500 on Curly Top at 10-to-1." "However did you pick him?" "Well, I had got a tip from the hall porter at my hotel." "He needs £5,000 like he needs another oil well." "Do you know him?" "An American, name of Latimer." "Does he play poker, do you suppose?" "Probably." "I think I should like to meet Mr. Latimer." "Why don't you ask him to join us in the bar?" "All right." "Stephen, I'd like you to meet a friend of mine." "Mr. Howard Latimer, this is Stephen Hurstwood." "How do you do?" "Sir Stephen, I am honored." "Have you been in England long, Mr. Latimer?" "No, sir." "Only a couple of weeks." "I'd been on the Continent the last few months." "I have no family to worry about... so I've been trying to see as much as I can, while I can." "I have a feeling this "phony war" won't last much longer." "I quite agree." "Things will probably get started any day now." "Derek and I were organizing a game of poker for tonight." "Would you care to join us?" "Well, thank you very much, but could we make it some other time?" "It's just that I feel in the mood for something more frivolous... maybe a show and then a nightclub." "Thanks, anyway." "Would you care for a drink?" "Fine." "Good." "What will you have, Latimer, whiskey and soda?" "Yes, that will be fine, thanks." "Maybe we could play poker tomorrow night?" "I'm afraid, I can't make it tomorrow night..." "I've got to go down to Hurstwood." "The government is taking over for the duration." "Make a rest home of it, or something, I suppose." "You know, it must be very satisfying, and sort of wonderful... to own a place like Hurstwood, you know, with everything that's back of it." "Yes, I suppose it would be." "I'm afraid I don't understand." "It's only that with the mortgage holders and the death duties... my inheritance of Hurstwood is purely nominal." "Stephen's father died only a few months ago." "And as I am being called into the service day after tomorrow..." "I shan't be around." "So, the death tax people, and the mortgage holders... can fight it out with the ghost for possession." "And good luck to all of them." "The ghost?" "The Hurstwood Ghost." "It's very well known." "You're kidding?" "Not at all." "Do you mean to say that you actually believe a ghost exists?" "Have you seen it yourself?" "No." "It doesn't appear to members of the family." "It only appears if you try to spend the night in the Cromwell Room." "You know, I really believe you're serious." "Well, I just don't happen to believe in ghosts, you see." "Really, a lot of people don't, you know." "Of course." "They've never seen one." "Do you mean to say that whenever anyone tries... to spend the night in this room, the ghost appears?" "That's right." "I don't suppose..." "I could spend the night there?" "I should be very happy to let you try to spend the night in the room." "Wonderful." "You know, I always wanted to" "I should also be very happy to bet that you can't do it." "By all means, let's have a bet." "You name the stakes." "Very well, £1,000." "£1,000?" "Well, if you feel you can't afford It." "Of course I can afford it." "It's just that it seems ridiculous to bet £1,000 on something..." "I'm certain to win." "I'm sorry, I never bet less than £1,000." "All right, it's a deal." "Good." "Well, good haunting." "Latimer?" "Derek?" "Please." "None for me, thanks." "I want to be certain that any spirit I see is genuine." "Non-spiritous?" "Exactly." "Here you are." "Thanks." "Now, just to be certain we all understand the terms of the bet..." "I have your check for £1,000 and I have Stephen's." "If you spend the entire night in the room, you have won." "If you leave it for any reason before 6:00 tomorrow morning..." "Stephen wins." "Right?" "Right." "Correct." "And you're to be allowed one candle and one match only." "You'll understand that better when you know more about the ghost itself." "That's just what I've been trying to find out." "Whose ghost is this, anyhow?" "What is supposed to be the story" "You'd have to use candles in that wing, in any case." "It's never been wired for electricity." "That's all right about the candle, but what about the ghost?" "Oh, yes." "There's one other thing." "So that you may be absolutely certain that anything which does appear... is not mortal... you can have this." "Really, I'm afraid I don't need it." "I don't know too much about guns." "Nonsense, it is very simple." "Here's the safety." "You have seven shots in all." "Here, try It." "Try it?" "Well, how am I gonna try it?" "Just shoot it into the fireplace." "You won't hurt anything." "Really, this isn't necessary." "Go ahead!" "You'll see how simple it is and then you can take it or not, as you please." "All right." "There." "Now just aim it into the fire and pull the trigger." "You'll have to be a bit more accurate than that, old boy... unless it's a very large ghost." "Of course, I don't suppose you'll need it... unless the ghost comes quite close to you." "There, now the safety is on again." "Well, do you want to keep it or not?" "I think I shall." "And I think I should tell you that I shall use it if the occasion arises." "You still want me to keep it?" "By all means." "Then at least you'll be prepared for anything... human." "Well, are you ready?" "Yes." "Come along, then." "Well, here we are." "You can't have a fire, of course, under the circumstances." "I hope you won't be too uncomfortable." "That's all right." "In fact I sleep better in a cold room." "Sleep!" "Do you actually mean to sleep?" "Of course." "Interested as I am in the phantom... especially since I can't pry any information from either of you..." "I'm afraid I can't sit up all night for it." "Yes, if the ghost wants to have any dealings with me... it can wake me." "Yes." "You were interested in the ghost." "You'll find it all in here, I believe." "Yes, here it is." "Really?" "Sir Stephen, I had no idea that the ghost was written up." "Let's see now." ""The Hurstwood Ghost."" "Yes, very interesting." "I see." "You wanted me to read this, while I was alone in the room... so that the shadows and the silence would make it that much more convincing." "No need to read it at all, if you'd rather not." "It's not in the bet." "I shall." "I wouldn't miss it for anything." "Well, here's your candle." "You have the pistol, and here is the match." "You haven't any others, I take it?" "No." "Here's my lighter, though." "Thank you." "Would you care to light it now?" "No, thank you, I think, I'll wait until after you're gone... so there won't be any drafts." "Good idea." "Yes, very prudent, I should say." "Here is the key." "Goodnight." "Goodnight." "Goodnight." ""The tale of the Hurstwood Ghost..." ""dates from early in the 19th century..." ""when the great-great-grandfather of the present baronet..." ""first inherited Hurstwood." ""He was expecting his two young daughters to return from school..." ""on the Continent..." ""but as it happened, they came a day early..." ""and he was away when they arrived..." ""so there was no one to greet them but an elderly caretaker..." ""who finished her work and left before dark." ""Indeed, they could find only a stump of a candle..." ""with which to light their way to bed." ""But once there, the two girls were not dismayed..." ""especially Julia, the more venturesome of the two." ""They lay chatting for a time in the candle's feeble light..." ""when, suddenly, they thought they heard a sound from somewhere below." ""A sound, as of someone moving about the house." ""Geraldine was frightened, but Julia said she was going to investigate." ""Geraldine tried to dissuade her, but it was useless." ""Julia took the candle and departed..." ""while Geraldine fearfully awaited her return." ""Presently, after a long silence, she heard a muffled sound..." ""which she could not identify." ""She waited, straining her ears, but the noise was not repeated." ""Finally, she heard the sound of footsteps coming up the stairs." ""They came along the hall and turned into the room." ""She called out to her sister, but there was no answer..." ""as the steps came on across the room." ""Geraldine laughed anxiously and begged Julia not to play jokes..." ""but only silence answered, as the footsteps paused beside the bed." ""Geraldine reached out her hand and felt a wave of relief..." ""as it touched the soft edge of her sister's dressing gown." ""She lifted her hand to touch her sister's face..." ""but felt instead something wet and warm." ""When their father arrived the next morning..." ""his eyes were assailed by a dreadful sight." ""On the stairs, a trail of blood..." ""the footsteps leading upward..." ""and on the floor in the girls' room..." ""Julia's body, its head severed from the trunk..." ""and on the bed his beloved Geraldine..." ""her hair snow-white..." ""her lips mumbling the tortured fancies of a maniac." ""In time they pieced the story together from her ravings..." ""but she remained completely mad." ""The deed was attributed to a homicidal lunatic..." ""who had just escaped from the nearby Sunnyview Sanitarium. "" "What a lot of tripe." "What's that?" "Well, here we go." "Hello, Sir Stephen, or is it Derek?" "Now, I'm glad you showed up, because things were getting pretty dull." "By the way, old boy, you forgot something." "Your head." "I'd ask you in, but it seems a little late for that." "That was a neat trick, coming in." "How did you do it?" "A sliding panel?" "Now that's a nice effect, I'd love to know how you did it." "You do this professionally, or just to entertain friends?" "By the way, old boy, when you get to the foot of the bed... you can hold up there, if you don't mind." "You're a mighty taciturn ghost, aren't you?" "I think I should tell you that I have a gun..." "I'm quite willing to shoot, if you don't stop now." "Look, don't come any closer, do you hear me?" "Don't come any closer!" "All right!" "All right!" "Look, didn't you hear me?" "I said don't." "I said..." "Don't come any closer!" "You want me to run." "But, I'm not gonna run!" "I won't run!" "I suppose it is better than having the old place pulled down." "But it's a gloomy business, anyhow, isn't it?" "At least I come out of it with a bit of money this way." "More than it's worth, really." "Yes, there's that." "You say it's a Canadian who's buying?" "Yes, a flyer." "He stayed here a few weeks once... when he was wounded in the Battle of the Bulge and liked it." "Very wealthy." "Oil, I believe." "Like that American." "Lorimer, or whatever his name was." "Do you remember him?" "Did you ever hear from him again?" "Yes." "Latimer." "No, I never did." "I suppose he went back to the States and joined up once they got in." "Seems a century ago, doesn't it?" "I wonder how he came through." "Yes." "Why, it's the gentleman from America." "Mr. Latimer." "Hello, Latimer." "You seem to have come through the recent mess very well." "Looking very fit, I should say." "Thank you." "It's nice of you to say so." "I feel quite well, in fact." "Latimer, how nice." "And how odd." "You know, we were just now wondering about you." "Yes." "Stephen here got himself a game leg, but we all made it... and I suppose that's the main thing." "Yes, isn't it?" "You know, you gave us quite a fright that night you stayed here." "When you passed out." "We thought you were dead." "Yes." "It took us forever to find a pulse." "We thought the doctor would never get here." "It was a tremendous relief when we telephoned the doctor next morning... and he told us you were simply in a state of shock... and would come out of it all right." "Always meant to get in touch, you know, but never quite got around to it." "I paid Stephen the money, of course." "We decided that a faint from fright was equivalent to running." "Seems obvious that you would have run if you'd been able." "And of course, Stephen needed the money so much more than you did." "It was a life-saver, really." "Yours was one of the most successful apparitions... we ever staged, I believe." "I've always thought it was the way we handled the blanks." "The blanks?" "Yes." "By putting one real bullet into the clip and letting you fire it into the fireplace... you'd be less likely to realize that the remainder were blanks." "I always thought that story about Julia and Geraldine... and the headless ghost and all of it was far too theatrical." "Yet- Julia." "Then you're the one!" "You won't escape this time!" "To murder an innocent girl!" "What's the matter, you fool?" "Get away from me!" "Come here." "No, you won't escape this time." "To murder an innocent girl!" "What's wrong with you?" "Have you lost your mind?" "Get away!" "No, you don't!" "Never escape from me again!" "Never!" "Get away from me!" "Get off." "Stephen, are you all right?" "I'm terrible sorry, sir." "He gave us the slip." "Lucky we knew where to come to right away." "Always comes here, he does." "Comes here?" "From where?" "From Sunnyview." "It's the sanitarium right over the hill, sir." "You know." "Yes." "No." "No, no." "Harmless as a baby, he is, between his attacks." "But he'd kill a man just like that, when one of them's on him." "And that's a fact." "Seems he's got some idea his sister, Julia, was murdered." "And he's got to be revenged on the man that cut her head off." "Julia!" "Julia!" "Goodbye." "May God have mercy on us." "And just because a silly girl..." "lost her head over some imaginary noises years before." "Apparently some people can't read." "It's all right." "Just a young lady... who needs help to put the chains on her car." "I'll be back shortly." "Meanwhile, considering the gravity of our next announcement..." "I think this is more appropriate." "A very interesting experience." "It's been years since I saw a Stutz Bearcat." "Now for a few posthumous announcements." "The bullets used on tonight's program... were made with new enriched gunpowder." "Furs by Feline." "Tonight's guests were flown to Hollywood... by the world's oldest airlines." "Next week, we shall fly some more in... if space is available." "Until then, good night."