" When did it start?" " At 0500." "We're seven min?" "tes in." "Private Miller yo?" "'ve been smoking ltem 9 for seven minutes and 13 seconds." "We're going to ask yo?" "several questions." "?" "ow do you feel?" "Well' sir I feel like a..." "Like a slice of butter melting on top of a big old pile of flapjacks." "Yeah." "Okay, Private Miller, when you think of your superiors what emotions do you feel?" "Okay, Private Miller?" "Is this normal?" "Okay, Private..." "Okay, Private Miller?" "Private Miller." "Answer the q?" "estion." "This went out' sir." "Can you torch me?" "We'll send someone in." "?" "oly bejesus!" "Private Miller' answer the q?" "estion." "What was the q?" "estion again' sir?" "When you think of yo?" "r s?" "periors, what emotions do yo?" "feel?" "Yo?" "know what problem I have with your f?" "cking little dog-and-pony act you call the military?" "?" "ere it is." "One:" "Lots of d?" "des." "Where are the boobies?" "Two:" "Why are We underground right noW, sir?" "Why can't we be out in the open?" "Why aren't we in a square right now?" "Why aren't we talking to people' letting them know Item 9 exists?" "Get it out." "Shout off the rooftops:" ""This is great!" "This is the bee's knees' ltem 9!"" "Private, we need you to be serious." "I'm serio?" "s." "Your dick' my mouth." "That's inappropriate." "Fuck yo?" "!" "I've seen enough." "Shut it down." "Bury the hatch." "Sell the land." "And dispose of him." "This never happened." "D?" "de, what happened to yo?" "r eye?" "?" "ello." "Can you g?" "ys understand me?" " ?" "ey. ?" "ey' where we going?" " This is General Brat." "We've reached a final concl?" "sion on item 9." "Illegal!" "Hey, this is Sam." "Good morning." "Welcome to KRAD." "You know, I think that last caller had some undeniable points." "Right now, we're gonna get to the next caller, Dale Denton." "?" "ey, Sam." "Big h?" "ge fan." "First-time caller." " ?" "ere's my piece." " All right." "If marij?" "ana is not legal within the next five years I have no faith left in humanity, period." "Everyone likes smoking weed." "They have for tho?" "sands of years." "They're not gonna stop anytime soon." "It makes everything better." "Makes food better." "Makes music better." "It makes sex feel better, for God's sakes." "It makes shitty movies better, you know?" "?" "i, there." "Are you Sandra Danby?" "Yeah." "Well' I'm Garth from Global Saviors, and..." " What is this?" " I'm joking." "Yo?" "failed to show up for divorce proceedings four times under co?" "rt order, and yo?" "'ve been served." " Oh' great." "Thanks a lot' asshole." " Sorry." "I'm just saying love has no age." "Yo?" "can't instantly tell me that a man, because he's a certain age can't marry a woman or love a woman." "I'm dating a high-school girl." "You're not maximizing your potential." "Think this girl takes you seriously?" "?" "o, b?" "t if I'm 25 and the girl is 18 years old yo?" "know, in society, that might look bad." " Hey, as long as it's consensual." " I think it's consensual." "Yo, you been served." "Yo?" "'ve been served." "Yo?" "'ve been served." "Yo?" "'ve been served." "Walter Wadska the third." "Yo?" "here to fix the fax machine?" "?" "o, I'm here to tell you yo?" "owe MasterCard 4068 bucks." "Yo?" "'ve been served by the best." "Keep it real." "Why don't yo?" "get a real job, yo?" "fucking cocksucker?" " ?" "ey' "Electric Aven?" "e."" " I know, right?" " Take that shit to the next level' eh?" " Okay, I will." " Dr. Edgar Terrence?" " Yes." "Yo?" "have repeatedly refused to trim the monkey tree that spills onto your neighbor's property." "And now because of that' yo?" "'ve been served." "Yo?" "'re a jerk." "All this current system is doing is putting money in the hands of criminals and it's making ordinary people like yo?" "and me deal with those criminals." "Yo?" "ever dealt with a dr?" "g dealer?" "It's terrible' it's weird, it's awkward." "They think they're your friend' b?" "t they're not." "Dale, I get your point." "Thanks for your input." "Next caller, please." "I can't come." "What?" "Why the fuck not' Dale?" "I just..." "Look, I can't come." "I have a lot of st?" "ff to do tomorrow." "It's a bad day for me." "Jesus Christ' Dale." "When Were you gonna tell me?" "My mom has been shopping all day." " Why?" " She's already planning on cousco?" "s." "I said I might be able to go, so why is she doing that already?" " ?" "ow I look like an asshole." " You are one." "Come on, don't say that." "I just can't go." "I have a job." " Fine." " "Fine"?" "Don't come." "I don't care." "Then Why have yo?" "been inviting me?" "I thought you wanted me to go." "If yo?" "don't wanna meet them' I don't want you to." "I want to." "I can't." "I have a job." "I'm sorry." "What do yo?" "want from me?" "I just know they'll like you' that's all." "Yo?" "'re great' and you're funny and you're sexy." "I just want them to see that." " You Want them to see that I'm sexy?" " ?" "ey' people?" " ?" "i, Mr. Edwards." " Can I help yo?" "?" "o, I'm good." "Thank you, though." "Yeah?" "I see you don't have a visitor's badge." "That's why I ask." " I'm with her' actually." " Act?" "ally, this is my boyfriend." "I heard that." "I wish I didn't hear that, b?" "t I just heard that." "What's that s?" "pposed to mean?" "I'm just wondering Why yo?" "don't date a nice g?" "y your own age." " She's very mature for her age." " Yeah." " Angie' hey. ?" "ow's it going?" " ?" "ey." "?" "ey, Clark, how you doing' man?" "What's ?" "p?" "I'm good, bro." "I'm good." "D?" "de, I wanted to tell you." "Yo?" "were hilario?" "s today in drama class." "Yo?" "r Jeff Goldbl?" "m impression made me pee my pants." "I wish." "Oh' hey' I almost forgot." "Last week when we worked out, yo?" "forgot yo?" "r shorts in my car." "Oh' yeah." " ?" "ere yo?" "go." " Thanks." "Yeah, no problem, no problem." " Can yo?" "hold those?" " Yeah." " Yeah." " ?" "ow's it going, Sporty Spice?" "This is my boyfriend, Dale." " ?" "ey' nice to meet yo?" "." " You too." "I've heard so m?" "ch abo?" "t you." "Yo?" "'re real cool." " I mean, yo?" "'re great." "Yeah." " Yeah, awesome." "Anyways' yeah, d?" "de' next year." "?" "ext year college, man." "College." "Gonna be kick-ass." "I will watch her back for yo?" "." "I know there's tons of g?" "ys that are gonna be trying to get on that shit." " Oh' good." " Beca?" "se I got that..." "Yeah." "Yo?" "got her ass?" "Perfect." " I'll watch her ass for..." " ?" "e's trying to be nice." " I'll catch you at ?" "ome Ec." " Okay." "Yo?" "guys got ?" "ome Ec together too." "That's cool." " We got a few classes together." " ?" "ice to meet you." "Time to s?" "ck today's dick." "That's what I'm talking about." "See yo?" "g?" "ys later." " All right, Clark." " Clark's a great guy." "?" "e's totally gonna take care of Angela' man." "?" "e's great." "He's a wonderful lab partner. ?" "e'll keep an eye on her." "Why don't yo?" "go fuck yo?" "rself, yo?" "weird prick?" "I'm a teacher." "Yo?" "can't talk to me like that." "I'm not a student' so I can say whatever I Want yo?" "chimp-fucking little bastard." " Act?" "ally..." "Yo?" "'ve got T-minus 30 seconds to get off school property or I call the liaison officer." " We're leaving." "I'm sorry." " Middle finger won't stop the clock." "What a jerk." "What's that guy's problem?" "Jes?" "s." "I don't..." "Normally he's..." "That's really weird." "I'd love to have dinner with you and yo?" "r parents tomorrow night." "I'm gonna go." "I'll definitely go." "I'll shuffle things around..." " Really?" " Yeah, I'll be there for sure." "Yeah, I Wanna show them yo?" "'re in good hands." "Yeah." "I got nothing to be embarrassed abo?" "t." "That means so much to me and my parents." "?" "o problem." "It's gonna be awesome." " Hello?" " ?" "ey' Saul." "Mind if I come by?" " Come on down." " Sweet." "Be there." " Hi, Mary." " Hi." "I thought the hurricane season was over." "I thought hurricane season was over." "I'm sorry." "Things just got out of hand." "Yeah, that's the way it was with my first husband." "?" "ello?" "?" "ey' man." "What the f?" "ck' man?" "I didn't buzz you in." "?" "ow the monkey did you get in here?" "Some guy with a fauxhawk let me in." "?" "e was leaving when I..." " Fucking Kyle." " It might have been Kyle." " Asshole." " I'm sorry, man." "What the f?" "ck's the b?" "zzer for anyway?" "I don't know." "I'm sorry abo?" "t that." "I don't know yo?" "r protocol yet." "Stuff your sorries in a sack." "It's not your fa?" "It." " Okay." " It's these jerk-offs. ?" "ave a seat." "Okay, cool." "Thanks, man." "Awesome." "Yo, check this out." "Satellite radio." "Got two TVs and radio." "That's pretty rad." "That's home entertainment." "Yo?" "'re very entertained." "Oh' wow." "Yo?" "got a c?" "te picture too." "Oh' yeah." "Me and my bubbe." "?" "ey, let me ask you something." "Yeah?" "Do yo?" "think yo?" "could pull the plug on someone if yo?" "needed to?" "Like, euthanasia?" "Like, on her?" "If I needed to." "I'm kind of in a hurry, man." "I don't know if we sho?" "ld start going down that road." "I co?" "ld talk all day about euthanasia." "Don't get me started." " Maybe we sho?" "ld..." " We'll save it." " Save it for next time." " I'll take that rain check." "Business for the businessman." " Yeah, yo?" "got my number." " Okay." " Brass tacks." " Yes." "Just got a shipment of the dopest dope I've ever smoked." "?" "ands doWn' dopest dope I've ever smoked." "?" "ot better than the Blue Oyster." "It can't be." "I can't handle that." "This is like if that Blue Oyster shit met that Afghan Kush I had and they had a baby." "And meanwhile, that crazy ?" "orthern Lights st?" "ff I had and the S?" "per Red Especial Snowflake met and had a baby." "And by some miracle, those two babies met and fucked this would be the shit that they birthed." " Yes." " This is the product of baby f?" "cking." " Smell it." " Okay." "Smell it." "Enjoy." "It's like God's vagina." "What, yo?" "wanna bathe in it?" " I wanna live in here." " You Wanna be it?" "My God' I j?" "st wanna shove it up my nose' have that smell all day." " That's amazing." " Shove it anywhere you like." "Beautiful." "What's it called?" " Pineapple Express." " Pineapple Express." "It's this thing, like' El ?" "ino." "This airflow that comes from ?" "awaii and Canada." "It gets the dirt, mixes it in with the weed in a special way." "It's very scientific." "I won't go into it right now." "But I am the only g?" "y in the whole city that has it." "Only 10 bones more for a quarter." "Okay, I'll take a q?" "arter." " All right, yo?" "'re on." " Thank yo?" "very m?" "ch." "Let me get my scale." "Get it going." "Grab the scale." "Let's get me out of here." "I thought hurricane season was over." "Oh' crow." "Where are yo?" "' you little fucker?" "What the f?" "ck is this thing?" " Cross joint." " Yeah." " You ever smoke one of those?" " You can smoke this?" " Yeah, man." " ?" "o." "This is the f?" "ture." "This is, like' the apex of the vortex of joint engineering." "It's r?" "mored that M. M. O'Shaughnessy designed the first one." "The g?" "y who designed the Golden Gate Bridge." "My second favorite civil engineer behind ?" "annskarl Bandel, Madison Square Garden." "What yo?" "do is yo?" "light all three ends at the same time." " Really?" " And then the smoke converges creating a trifecta of joint-smoking power." "This is it, man." "This is what your grandchildren are gonna be smoking." "Future." "The f?" "ture." "That's amazing." "Well' got the weed?" " Yeah." " In the bag." "Bea?" "tif?" "I." "Okay." "Be careful with that thing' man." "?" "ere's the cash, grab the stash." "Alrighty' man, thanks." "?" "ave a good one." "Don't h?" "rt yourself." "Adios." "Well' hey' wait a min?" "te' man." "Let's smoke this f?" "cking thing." "I really..." "I can't' man." "I gotta..." "I can't even light this thing on my own." "Yeah, I need yo?" "r help' man." " I'm in." " Come on!" " Why not?" "Let's do it." " Come on down!" "Why not?" "What do I do?" "Okay, here's What yo?" "do." " You eq?" "ip yourself." " I'm equipping." " Equip me' sir." " Okay." "Yo?" "are going to light these two ends while I light this end." " Okay." " Are you ready?" " Ready." " Blast off." " I'm gonna do it." " Good." "Go for it." "It's better to co?" "gh." "It's like..." "Makes yo?" "10 times more higher than the cross Weed and the Pineapple Express." "Yo?" "'re like' totally fucking Gong Show'ed, man." "Oh' fuck." "?" "ang on one second, man." "Oh' you f?" "cker." "Who is it?" "It's Chris Gebert, man." "Let me up." "Shit." "What's a Gebert?" "Come on up." "?" "e ain't getting any of that Pineapple Express." "Chris is getting Snicklefritz." "?" "ey." "So listen, man." "I gotta ask you." "So..." "Listen' man." "You've been buying from me for, like, two months' right?" " Two months." " I gotta ask' man." "What's ?" "p with the suit?" "I'm a process server." "So I have to wear a suit." "Wow, yo?" "'re a servant?" "Like a butler?" " A cha?" "ffe?" "r?" " ?" "o. ?" "o." "What?" "?" "o' I'm not..." " Shine shoes?" " I'm a process server." " I like..." " In process." "I work for a company that's, like' hired by lawyers to hand out legal documents." "Like subpoenas to people who don't want them." "I gotta wear disguises sometimes just to make them admit they're themselves so I can serve them the papers." "Disg?" "ise." "Kind of, I g?" "ess." " It's a hell of a job." " That's cool, man." "Like a day-to-day basis, it's fine." "Like today' I' like, sat in my car I smoked, like' 10 doobies and then I went to go visit my girlfriend at lunch." "?" "ice." "What?" "You sucked on her titties?" "?" "o, I just kissed her." "I just did that to make it seem cool." "That's cool." "Does she like to smoke weed?" "A little sometimes." "She has a couple..." "She's in high school, so as m?" "ch as any high-school kid." "She's cool as hell, actually." " You'd get along With her." " Really?" "Yeah, yo?" "know, it only sucks when I go visit her in high school and the guys she goes to school with are strong and handsome and really funny." "Like, do good impressions of Jeff Goldbl?" "m and shit like that." "And' like, I just feel like a fat, dumb' fucking stinky ass-turd when I'm there." " What?" " It really..." "It s?" "cks for my ego." " Fuck Jeff Goldblum, man." " That's what I say." "Yo?" "know, don't get down on yourself." "Yo?" "got a great girl." "Yo?" "got a great job where you don't do anything." "Yo?" "get to smoke weed all day." "I wish I had that." "Are yo?" "kidd...?" "Yo?" "do." "Yo?" "have the easiest job on Earth." " You do smoke weed all day." " That's true." "Yo?" "didn't think of that." " I do have a good job." " Yeah, yo?" "do nothing." " Thanks, man." " ?" "o prob." "Thank yo?" "." "Oh' shit." "All right." "Business." " Got my persona." " Yeah, yeah." "?" "ey." "Put that cross joint o?" "t." "?" "e sees that' he'll never get the fuck out of here." " What's up, Chris?" " Yo, hey, Sa?" "I." " ?" "ey." " ?" "ow yo?" "doing, buddy?" "All right, homes." "Good." " Who's this?" " ?" "ey." "Oh, that's my friend Mark." "Yo?" "got the do?" "gh?" "There you go." " Appreciate it." " ?" "ice." "Good to meet yo?" "' Mark." " Do you have any Percocet, please?" " Percocet?" "What are you talking about?" "I don't sell that shit." " Chris." " Chris." "Yo?" "told him I was gonna sell Percocet?" " I didn't say anything about Percocet." " What the fuck?" " I j?" "st wanted a couple Percocets." " Well' I..." "Yo?" "came to the wrong place." "Wrong place." " Sorry." " Yeah, nice." "Peace out, homes." " Thank..." " God." " What the fuck?" " Yeah." " Fucking lingerer." " Yeah, totally." " Lingerer." " ?" "ardcore." "Fuck." " Bums me o?" "t." " Bums me o?" "t too." "If there's one q?" "ality I hate in a person' it's lingering." " That's right." "You and me both." " Yeah, yeah." "So I'm c?" "rio?" "s." "What have those people done that you go and process and service?" "I don't know." "It's always something different' I g?" "ess." "This g?" "y..." "Ted Jones, who knows." "You know?" " Ted Jones?" " Yeah, why?" "My guy' Red, who I buy from' he gets his st?" "ff from a Ted Jones." " Really?" " Maybe it's the same g?" "y." "That'd be weird." "It's a pretty normal name, I guess, but..." "Anyway, I should really get going, man." "I gotta go." "D?" "ty calls, b?" "t it's good to see you." "Thanks." "Yo?" "'re gonna smoke and run?" "Come on, man." "We can go look at some crazy things on the Internet together." "That so?" "nds appealing, but I think I should probably just get going." " Oh' that s?" "cks." " Yeah." "That's cool' man." "What are you doing this weekend?" "Beca?" "se, yo?" "know, my bubbe's got season tickets to the opera and she can't make it' so wanna go see Phantom?" " Of the Opera?" " Yeah." "I can't this weekend' b?" "t yo?" "know what?" "?" "ere." "Yo?" "know..." "I'll run out of weed in a couple days." "I'll come by' hang out." " We'll watch 227 and shit." " Definitely." "Cool, man." "Well' thanks." "Good to see you." " Peace' brother." " Okay." "One love." "When you got behind on the mortgage someone finally made you a loan?" "Yes, he did." "Yes, he did." "What was the interest rate you got?" " It was 12 or 13 percent." " That's disgusting." " ?" "ello?" " Hello." "?" "ey, Angie' what's happening?" "I just talked to my mom, and they are so excited you're coming for dinner." "Like, so excited." "And so am I, but we're all really excited." "Thank you so much." "?" "o problem." "I'm psyched too." "It's gonna be awesome." "Cousco?" "s." "The food so nice' they named it twice." "Dale, anyway, I can't wait for next year when this bullshit's over." "Oh' shit." "I see the guy I gotta serve." "I'll call you back." "Fucking cops." "Shit." "Jesus." "What an adorable little cop." "Weird." "Jesus." "F?" "ck." "What the f?" "ck Was that?" "Oh' shit." "D?" "de." "D?" "de." "D?" "de." "D?" "de." "Oh' no!" " Drive, drive." " Who the fuck is that?" "I don't know, b?" "t I ain't waiting to see." "Pineapple Express." "Oh' my God!" "Oh, my God!" "Oh' my God!" "Oh, my God!" "I saw brains and blood!" "Come on!" "Come on!" "Where do I go?" "?" "ello?" "Sa?" "I, it's Dale." "Let me in." "Let me in." "I just saw some crazy shit." "Please." "Let me in." " It's Dale Denton." "Let me in, man?" " Dale?" "Yes, Dale." "That's what I said." "It's Dale." "Let me in." "Oh' all right' man." "Come on ?" "p." "I buzzed it." "Open the door when I b?" "zz it." "Buzz it in three seconds exactly." "One, two..." " Did it work?" " On three!" "I did it on three." "On "one' two' three, go"?" "Just on three." " ?" "e fucking killed him." " ?" "ey' I got neighbors." "?" "e fucking killed him." " Who killed who?" " A cop." "A lady and a guy." "A cop' a lady and a guy?" "That's a massacre." "Yo?" "saw it?" "?" "o, it was just a g?" "y." " What happened to the lady?" " ?" "o. ?" "o." "A woman." "A policewoman and a g?" "y' another g?" "y' shot another guy an Asian guy, in the window, at fucking Ted's house." "Whoa' was the other guy Ted?" "I don't know." "?" "e was a big' gray-haired man and he had a robe and he shot him." "And his brain flew every..." "I'm gonna be..." "I'm gonna throw up." "What?" " That was chicken fries." " Sick." "Yo?" "threw up on my printer." " I did." " Did yo?" "break it?" " I hope not." " Listen' man." "I think the guy was Ted." "And the Asians are number-two in town so you saw Ted capping the competition." "They saw me seeing them shoot the g?" "y." "What?" "They saw yo?" "And you f?" "cking came here?" " Did they follow you here?" " I don't know." " Did they follow you here?" " I don't know." "Look." "Look." "Okay." "I saw them kill him." "I freaked out." "I panicked, okay?" "I tossed my roach." " I crashed into two cars." " Yeah." "So they must have heard..." "They know someone was out there." " They know someone saw." " They know "someone."" "They don't know it Was yo?" "." "Right?" "I don't..." "I mean, yeah." "I don't know." " Yes." " I hope not." "Relax." "Just sit back." "Get ready to enjoy some of the rarest weed known to mankind." "Is it really that rare?" "It's' like, the rarest." "It's almost a shame to smoke it." "It's like killing a unicorn with, like, a bomb." "Are yo?" "the only g?" "y in town who has this?" " You're act?" "ally the only guy?" " Yeah." "My guy Red said he was giving me an excl?" "sive sneak preview." "I'm the only guy yo?" "sold it to?" "The other guys got Snicklefritz?" "Yeah." "So We're, like' the only guys." "And Red got this from Ted?" "Ted's the man." "Let's get the f?" "ck out of here!" "Go!" "Go!" "Let's go!" "Let's go!" "I threw a roach of this o?" "tside of Ted's house." "So what?" "I throw roaches all over town." "?" "o. ?" "e co?" "ld find the roach and say' "It's Pineapple Express." "Sa?" "I is the only g?" "y who has Pineapple Express." "?" "e must have seen the m?" "rder!" "Let's kill him!"" " Let's get o?" "t of here!" " Fuck!" "Wait!" "Stop!" "Get weed!" "Get the weed!" "Anything we might need." "Snacks, food' Fruit Roll-Ups." " Let's get the fuck o?" "t of here!" " Okay, okay." "Red said he'd be here." "Them some dr?" "gs." "Smells like vomit in this house." "Want a hit, man?" "It's still lit." "I'm having dinner with my wife." "She can tell." "Smell it on my sweater." "For real?" "Yeah, for real." "Yo?" "wanna wear my vest?" "It smell good." "?" "ot my style." "Yo?" "ain't got no style, motherf?" "cker." "You have reached the voice mailbox of..." " Ted." " Ted, it's B?" "dlofsky." " We're here." "Sa?" "I's gone." " And Mathe..." " And Matheson." " I think he knew We Were coming." "They not here, Ted." "?" "i, Ted." "Okay, what do you know abo?" "t Ted?" "I think he's crazy abo?" "t murdering." "Jesus, man." "Well' how much money do you have?" " I have, like' the 75 that you gave me." " That's it?" " Well' how much do you have?" " Three b?" "cks." "What yo?" "getting on my case for?" "I have more than yo?" "." "Well' that's my 75 technically." "So I have $78 and yo?" "have nothing." "I don't know." "Let's just go..." "Go to a motel or a hotel and j?" "st hide out." "The police were in on it." "Could have flagged credit cards." "They'll find us." "Shit." "I wish We could j?" "st go nowhere." "Okay." "Even if he found that roach, how could he know where you are?" "?" "eat-seeking missiles." "Bloodho?" "nds." "Foxes." "Barracudas." "I'm kind of flabbergasted when yo?" "say things like that." "It's Weird." "Thank yo?" "." "?" "ot a compliment." "?" "ere's the question." "Let's say he act?" "ally fo?" "nd the roach." "?" "ow could he connect the Pineapple Express weed to you?" "?" "e can't, man." "Only fucking Red knows." "Only Red knows, man." "Who is Red?" "Red's' like, the middleman between' like, Ted and me." "And we're, like' mad fucking tight, man." "One time, he got this girl to give me a hand job, like' within five minutes of meeting her." "It was like' "I don't even know yo?" "r name, whoa."" "That is pretty rad, b?" "t, like' let's say Ted calls him and is like:" ""Did yo?" "sell the Pineapple Express to anyone?"" "?" "e'll be, "Yeah, I sold it to Saul." Why Wo?" "ldn't he?" "?" "o." "Oh' no." "Fuck that, man." "Fucking hand job' Dale." "Imagine if I gave yo?" "a hand job." " Why wo?" "ld I wanna do that?" " ?" "o, I mean if I got yo?" "a hand job." "The same r?" "les don't apply to Red." "?" "e's a drug dealer." "I'm a drug dealer." "Are yo?" "saying yo?" "don't tr?" "st me?" "?" "o, that's not at all What I'm..." "Yo?" "know what?" "Yo?" "know?" "Just ignore What I said." "Call him." "Give him a call." "See what the dealio is." " ?" "ello." " Hey, Red, you okay?" "Yeah, Sa?" "I." "Yeah' I'm fine' man." "I just stubbed my toe." "Be careful, man." "Be caref?" "I." "Wear shoes in the house." "Safety." "Safety first, then teamwork." "?" "ow' listen." "Yo?" "know that Pineapple Express stuff yo?" "gave me?" "Don't tell anybody that yo?" "sold it to me." "I'd never talk to anyone abo?" "t the stuft that I do with you involving drugs." "All right, cool." "Listen' I'm gonna come by." "I gotta lay some shit on you." "There is a fly in the ointment." "Shit has hit the fan." "The lion will speak." " I'm in the middle of a convo." " ?" "o, seriously." " We're gonna be there in half an ho?" "r." " Perfect." " ?" "o, please. ?" "o, no, no." " Let's go over there and chill out." "?" "o, can we go tomorrow?" "Look, we're already here..." "There's somebody else on the phone with him." " Who?" " I don't know." "?" "e's whispering to another man." "We'll go in the morning." "It's better that way." " Okay." " Yes." "Yes." "Thank you." "Yes." " Hey." " So yo?" "'re coming by tomorrow?" "?" "ow'd yo?" "know that?" "?" "eard you whispering to that other guy that yo?" "were talking to." "Who is that?" "Right, Dale." "Good job." "Listen' I can't go in the morning beca?" "se my bubbe..." "Gotta change her clocks." "Daylight-savings." "Is that the bubbe that's on 41 st and River Street?" "The one where we played sh?" "ffleboard that one time?" "Yo?" "got it." "So, listen' we'll be chilling by noon." " ?" "oon it is' bromosexual." " Nice." "We sho?" "ld hit up the casino again." "It's been a while." "Okay, yeah." "We'll definitely hit the casino up." "Definitely." "All right' peace, brother." " Where is he?" " I don't know." " Why'd he mention a casino?" " I don't know." "Yo?" "make me call my good friend' send him into a booby trap." " And lie to him." " Is Saul Asian?" " Making me a shitty person." " Is he Asian?" " ?" "e's not Asian." " You're lying." " I'm not lying." "I'm not lying." " You're lying." "Did you hear slot machines?" " Man' I don't know where he is." " You tell me Where he is." "Tell me." "In 45 min?" "tes, I gotta go have dinner with my wife." " I got a reservation." " Forty-five?" "That's a dinner reservation yo?" "gonna miss." "That's a reservation I'll make." " I don't think so." " Beca?" "se if he doesn't start to..." " Look, can you do this one solo?" " ?" "o, I can't do this solo." "Are you crazy?" " What are you talking about?" "What?" " What, yo?" "trying to abandon me?" "This is teamwork." "This is a partnership." "We are in this together." " You Want me to stay?" " Yes." " Fine, I'll stay." " Thank yo?" "." " You happy now?" " Yes." "There's no way that we co?" "ld pa?" "se for a minute yo?" "g?" "ys go home and then tomorrow we co?" "ld just' like, continue?" "I should call Angie soon." "Make ?" "p some b?" "llshit." "I'm cold." "Yo?" "'re cold?" "Oh' I'm not cold at all." "Here." "I run hot." " Really?" " Yeah." " You got more body mass." " Thick blood." "Yeah, no, take it." " Thank yo?" "." " I don't appreciate that' but it's okay." "I'm gonna call Angie." "Space." "Dale, wait." "Wait." "The phones." "The phones." " You said they Were cops, right?" " They are, yeah." "I was thinking' maybe they can triangulate these things' man' or, like' trace them." " Right?" " That's how they got Saddam." " Right." " Fuck." "Yo?" "'re right' man." "Maybe they can even trace them like' when We're not even on them' you know?" "Maybe if we bury them, the reception will cut off and they won't be able to." "We can tie it to an animal, be a diversion." "We'll never catch an animal." "The sq?" "irrel'd be ?" "p in a tree' they'd think we were." "?" "o, no, no." " We'll b?" "ild a hot-air balloon and..." " ?" "o." " We'll smash them." " Yeah, yeah." "I'm gonna smash it." "On a rock." " Right here." "Good thinking." " Good idea." "Yes, destroy it." " Get it." " Die." "Yes." " What the fuck was that?" " I was trying to hit that tree." "I missed." " What tree?" " That one." "Why didn't you smash it on a rock like a normal person?" "I don't know. ?" "ow offen does somebody smash things?" "I'm rusty." "Did you at least see where it landed?" "I don't know." "Call it." "Call it?" "With What?" "My phone has been smashed." "I bet they can't even triangulate those things." "Well' you convinced me they can." "Yo?" "were very convincing back there." "?" "ey." "Fine." "I'll go find it." "F?" "ck." " Do you see it?" " See What?" "The phone, yo?" "idiot." "Why are we here?" "This place is so f?" "cking scary." "At least I had an idea." "Yo?" "didn't, so sh?" "t up." "That's not true." "I had two ideas." "?" "owhere and Quiznos." " What?" " What was that?" " What?" " What is that?" " What?" " I hear something." "What?" "I don't know." "Do yo?" "hear that?" "D?" "de, I literally hear nothing." "Oh' fuck!" "Where are yo?" "going?" "What are yo?" "r?" "nning from?" "Return to me now!" "?" "elp me!" "Tell him to get away from me!" "I'm scared of this darkness!" "I surrender!" " Go away!" "Go away!" " I'm unarmed!" " This isn't funny anymore!" " Dale!" " Fall back!" " Save me!" "Oh' shit." "Car." "Open it!" "Open it!" "Open the door!" "Open it!" " Unlock it." " I can't unlock it." "What are you doing?" "Watch the upholstery." " Go!" "I saw something!" " ?" "o!" "What did you see?" "Sh?" "t up!" "Sh?" "t the fuck..." "Shut ?" "p, man!" "I heard something, then I saw something." "Yo?" "didn't hear anything' man." "Well' I saw something." "And you're telling me that guy in the little short shorts broke your nose?" " Right." "The BeDazzler guy broke your nose, tough man?" "Wake up." "Get up." "Wake ?" "p." "?" "ow did I get on yo?" "I wonder." "Watch finally broke." "Crazy." "What time is it?" "That can't be right." "It co?" "ldn't be 3 in the morning, co?" "ld it?" "It's 3:00 right now?" "?" "oly shit, man!" "We were supposed to be at Red's at noon, man." "What if he's gone?" "?" "o, it's daylight-savings' so..." " So it's only 2:00." " Oh' no' it went forward an hour." "It's 4 o'-f?" "cking-clock?" "Fuck me. ?" "o' man." "That's bad." "Shit." "We slept for' like, 18 hours." "My bubbe..." "Man' my bubbe's gonna be so pissed." "Shit." "We gotta call Red." "Okay. ?" "ow?" "We'll go to a pay phone." "?" "o, I can't." "?" "is n?" "mber is in my phone." "Great." "Well' do you remember where he lives?" "Yeah, I know where he lives." "What are you insin?" "ating?" "Like, I'm forgetful?" ""Insinuating." Good word." "Do yo?" "know what that means?" " I do, believe it or not." " It means, like' "to seem like."" "Let's roll." "I'm done With the woods." "Let's go." "Come on, let's get the fuck out of here." "Okay." "Let's go. ?" "o." "It's not working." "The battery's dead." "Wait." "What do yo?" "mean, it's dead?" "What do I mean?" "I mean the battery's dead." "The battery's dead." "What do yo?" "mean, the battery's dead?" "?" "ow can I explain this to you differently?" "The battery is dead." "It ceased to live." "It's deceased now." "The car needs a battery to start, Sa?" "I." "?" "ow did this happen?" "Well' we clearly fell asleep with the battery on' and..." "Oh' man." "To talk radio?" " Yes, talk radio." " It's so boring' man." " Okay, okay." " The car j?" "st committed suicide." "Sh?" "t up' man." "I have an idea now." "We're gonna go." "We'll walk back to the road." "We'll hitchhike." "Someone will pick ?" "s up' take us to Red's." "Red Will tell us everything's fine, everything will go back to normal." "?" "ow does that sound?" "Good?" " That's a good idea." " Keep o?" "r heads on." "If we just keep thinking like this, we're fucking gravy." " All right." "I'm in." " Let's do it." " Can I have my jacket back, please?" " Yeah." " Thank yo?" "." " Thank yo?" "." "Thanks for taking care of it." "Look, it's like my th?" "mb is my cock." "That's not gonna get ?" "s a ride, man." "?" "ere's good." "Thanks for the smooth sailing, Sharid." "Yo?" "'re welcome." " You're sure We can trust this guy?" " Yo, Red." "Who is it?" " It's Bruce." " Br?" "ce?" "Who the fuck is this?" " Saul." "What's ?" "p?" " Who do you think it is?" "Who's this?" "I'm Dale, Mr. Red. ?" "ice to meet yo?" "." "Dale who?" "It's best if you don't know my full name." "Dale Denton. ?" "e's With me." "Dale Denton. ?" "ice to meet yo?" "' bro." " ?" "old on." "Let me get this lock' okay?" " You better." " Get in here." " Coming in." " Y'all Wanna buy some drugs?" " Frisk me." " What's up?" "What's up?" " Get it." "Look at that, h?" "h?" " What's up, players?" " What's up?" "I've been ?" "p in here trying to get a motherf?" "cking scholarship." "Chilling." "What's ?" "p with the clothes?" "We were camping." " Camping?" " Yeah." "Is yo?" "r lip okay' man?" " You been crying?" " Oh' my lip." "It's a cold sore." "?" "ever had one before, so I started to cry." "I think it's a lot worse than it looks, though." "Cold sore?" "Does that mean f?" "cking herpes?" "Yeah." "Yes, it does." "Fucking sick' man." "You know how many joints we've shared?" "I know." "I'm a disg?" "sting person." "?" "erpes is for life, bro." "I'm gonna try to definitely p?" "t some sort of medical ointment on it." "Been taking Vicodin." "Doesn't really take swelling down." "It's from that time." "I told you, man." "Yo?" "ate that lollipop out of that stripper's snatch." "You wanted to do it." "Out of her vagina." "Remember what you did?" "What did you do?" "Yo?" "ate a box of Nerds o?" "t of her butthole." "Yo?" "fucking said you wouldn't tell." "Yo?" "sowed yo?" "r own poison, man." "D?" "des' seriously, we're here for a reason." "Just ask him." "Chill." "I'm boiling some eggs over here." "We got a lot of time to hang o?" "t." " I'm making a fucking cake." " ?" "o shit." "Can I have a piece of that?" " Don't ask for a piece." " I can't have a piece?" "?" "o, yo?" "can't." "This is private." "Do yo?" "know what today is?" " Tuesday." " This is my cat's birthday today." "I don't see a cat in here." "I'm sorry." "Yo?" "let it out by accident?" "?" "o, because he died three months ago' okay?" "So now who's the f?" "nny guy?" "Sorry." "Today is his birthday and it is a tradition that on his birthday I get ?" "p extra early and make him his favorite kind of dessert." "Don't worry, bro." "Yo?" "r cat's going to heaven." "Yeah, maybe." "Maybe he went to heaven." "?" "e was a little fucker." "Could've gone to hell." "What are we talk...?" "Guys..." "Ask him." "J?" "st ask him' okay?" "Ask What?" "J?" "st come straight." "What's ?" "p?" " Yeah, right." " Lay it on him." "We need to know..." "We need to know abo?" "t your so?" "rce." " Ted." " Ted Jones." "See' Dale' here, is a protest servant." "I'm not." "That's not what I am." "?" "e's not that, b?" "t he was outside Ted's house..." "Don't..." "Look' we don't want to bring yo?" "in to What we're in' okay?" "Yo?" "don't Want any trouble." "We don't Wanna give you trouble." "It's probably best yo?" "don't know the whole story." " Don't think I can handle danger?" " What are you talking about?" " You can." " I totally can." "And for yo?" "to come into my house and not tell secrets because you think you're saving me well, in reality, it j?" "st makes yo?" "look like a dumb-ass." "Look at this." "See this?" "Yo?" "see that?" "There's no hair ?" "nder here, okay?" "What's the significance of that?" "It makes me aerodynamic when I fight." "I can take danger." "Okay, has anyone called asking abo?" "t Saul or the Pineapple Express?" "That's all we need to know." "Is it "?" "h-h?" "h" or "?" "h-uh"?" " It's "uh-?" "h."" " There it is, man." "Cleared." "Over." "Everything's fine." "I told you' bro." "We had a Wacky night in the woods but we both can put that behind us like adults." "?" "ow it's time to get s?" "per-duper high." "Got that bong I got in Tel Aviv?" ""Bong Mitzvah." ?" "it it up." "Yes." "There yo?" "go." "Why don't yo?" "follow his lead and chill o?" "t?" "I'm chill." "I'm chill as a cucumber, man." " You don't seem chill." " More chill than you." "Yo?" "'re more chill than me?" "Look at what I'm Wearing." "Kimono." "What are you wearing?" " Suit." " Yeah." "Exactly." "I don't know what's up with yo?" ", b?" "t I don't know if I like yo?" "." "Well' I don't know if I like yo?" "either' man." "Well' that's yo?" "r loss, because I'm a great friend." "I'm gonna ?" "se the telefono to call my wife, okay?" " Give her a call." " I will." " Go ahead." " Don't pay attention to what I'm saying." " Go ahead." " Sit on my couch my chillastic couch, and chill out." " I'm chilling right here." " Don't listen to what I'm saying." " This is private." "This is my wife." " I'm listening." "I'm not trying to be enemies." "I don't wanna be." " I wanna be friends." " Well' then good." " I wanna be best friends." " Come here." " Shake my f?" "cking hand." " Shake my hand." "Okay." " See' we can be friends." " I'm feeling it." " You feel that?" "We can be best friends." " I'm looking thro?" "gh you, man." "I'm looking thro?" "gh you too and I see I need to paint the spot on the wall behind yo?" "." " I'm looking thro?" "gh you." " Transparent." " I see your intentions." " I see your intestines and intentions." " What'd I have for dinner last night?" " Cake." "I'll be right back." "Make this phone call." "Bullshit." "?" "o, no, no." " Liar." " What are you doing' man?" "?" "e's a liar. ?" "e's lying to ?" "s' man." "?" "e's lying to ?" "s." "?" "o, he's not." "?" "e knows my name." "?" "e's acting weird." "We can't let him phone anyone, man." "Freaking o?" "t." "Yo?" "'re paranoid." "Give him the phone." "I do not trust you, sir." " You're paranoid." " ?" "e's acting weird." "Red' I'm sorry' bro." " Jesus!" " ?" "oly cock." "Fuck yo?" "!" "What are you doing, man?" "?" "e's sorry." "Oh' Jesus." "?" "erpes!" "I don't wanna have to do this." "Red' you're crazy' man." "Yo?" "bro?" "ght the devil into my house." " We're friends." " I know we are." " That's why it s?" "cks." " Are you on meth again?" "Dale, he's h?" "rting me!" "Toilet." "Flush." "What we do in this life echoes in eternity." "True!" "?" "e's going for the phone to call Ted!" "Stay out of here!" "Red' don't do it!" " Red!" " You assholes." "Yo?" "r?" "ined my portable phone." " TeamWork." " Yes." "Yo?" "'re gonna break the door." "Gonna pay for it?" "Fuck." "Phone." " Let go!" "Let go!" "Let go!" " What the hell...?" "I let go, now j?" "st get this goddamn door off of me!" "Tell us everything, now!" "Said they were gonna kill me." "What did you tell Ted?" "?" "e's crushing my balls." "Cr?" "shing my balls." "Smash them." "Fuck!" "Time o?" "t." "Time o?" "t." " Truce." " Time in." "Fuck yo?" "." " Stop!" " Cheater!" " I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." " Red!" " I'm sorry." "I'm sorry." " Get..." "Fuck." "God..." "Fuck!" " Take it, motherf?" "cker!" " Time out!" "Fuck!" "?" "o!" "?" "o, no, no!" "Where yo?" "going, huh?" "Where do yo?" "think yo?" "'re going' Mr. Wiggles?" " Come on." "Get back here." " Saul, help me!" "?" "elp me!" "?" "e's p?" "nching my bum!" "I'm done with this." "Let's talk." "Let's try words." "Use words!" "?" "o!" "?" "o!" "?" "o!" "Yo?" "okay, man?" " I'll get yo?" "another bong." " It's my cat's birthday." "?" "appy birthday." " All right?" " Thank yo?" "." "I think there's a package in the mailbox." "This ends now!" "Oh' shit." "Was that too m?" "ch?" "Can't get the edge." "Wait." "Got it." "Got it." "?" "ey, Dale." "Think we're gonna have to kill him?" "I don't think I'm capable of m?" "rder." "I don't think I am either." "Maybe we could just convince him to kill himself." "Or, just not say anything." "We need to find out everything he knows, okay?" "Wake up." "?" "ey, what's ?" "p' dudes?" "What's ?" "p?" "Tell ?" "s everything now." "Talk, Red." "I'm gonna flex and bust out of here." "Trapped." "?" "ot happening, Red." "Okay." "All right." "Okay, I'll talk." "Ted Jones, he knows you witnessed the murder. ?" "e fo?" "nd your roach." "?" "e sent two g?" "ys over here, Budlofsky and Matheson." "Two real big son of a bitches." "They're basically o?" "t to kill yo?" "guys." "They're gonna kill me too, unless I turn y'all over." "So yo?" "g?" "ys are basically f?" "cked." "?" "ow many cops does he have on his payroll?" "Tell us." " Well' there's the woman cop, Carol." " That's the lady cop." "I don't know. ?" "e co?" "ld have a bunch." "This d?" "de is super well-connected." "And he has a really awesome hideout too." "It's pretty badass." " Oh' shit." " What else?" "?" "e's at a war right now with the Asians." "They're in a drug war right now." "Asians?" "What Asians?" "Indians are technically Asian." " It's true." " What Asians?" "I don't know." "What?" "Chinese?" "Or Korean or..." "Vietcong?" "Yeah, little..." "Just little Asian people." "Like, the Asians with the guns and the dr?" "gs, and not his friends." " Ding-dong." " ?" "ey' Red!" " Oh' shit." " Oh' they're here." "They're here to kill me." "Okay, I know I sold y'all out." "I've been a son of a bitch and a shitty friend." "Sa?" "I, I'm talking to you." "Dale, yo?" "'re a new friend." "I can make it up." "I forgot' "bro's before ho's."" "Just go o?" "t the back porch." "I won't say anything." " I'll cover for yo?" "." " Thanks." "?" "o sweat." "It was Dale Denton." "Dale Denton and Saul." "They're on the back porch." "Yo?" "can catch them if you hurry." "Go." "?" "ey." "In here." "I've gotta get to a phone." "Come on." " We should hide." " Why?" "If Red tells Ted's guys abo?" "t my name then they'll go to my apartment." "There, I have Angie's name." "They'll p?" "t that together, find her." "Let's go." "?" "o." "I think we sho?" "ld stay." " Why?" " I'm in the d?" "mpster already." "Well' then, get out." "Come on, yo?" "'re already dirty." " They're gone." " Well, find out what he knows." "Red' it's yo?" "r last chance, man." "Yo?" "gonna give us something we can use?" "Matheson, you gotta be kidding me." "I mean, What more do yo?" "want?" "I told you that the guy's name is Dale Denton." "?" "e's obviously working with Saul." "They came in here' b?" "sted my house to shit." "They kicked the hell out of me duct-taped me to my grandfather's wheelchair." "What more do you want?" "Want me to read yo?" "r horoscope?" " You hear that' Ted?" " Ask if either of them were Asian." " What skin color were they?" " They were white people." "Denton might've been a jew." "I don't know." "I don't j?" "dge people based on things like that." "Obvio?" "sly." "We're friends." "Ted, you hear him?" "Dale Denton:" "Not Asian." "All right." "Kill Red." "Listen' I would appreciate it if both y'all would take your shoes off." "This is brand-new carpet." "Yo?" "'re tracking m?" "d in here." "Matheson, you got British Knights on." "I ain't seen anybody wear them since 1987." "What the hell are you doing?" "Ted told me to kill him." "Well' how abo?" "t a little fucking discretion here?" "See?" "See?" "See, right there." "Yo?" "see that?" " You catch it?" " See What?" "Yo?" "used to not give a fuck about discretion." "I seen yo?" "p?" "ll somebody's jawbone off." "I seen it." "Yo?" "was r?" "thless." "Yo?" "was r?" "thless, man." "What the f?" "ck' man?" "Yo?" "shot me in my stomach." "I'm gonna die now probably." "I had you all over here for dinner." "Fish tacos." "This how yo?" "do me?" "So, What did Budlofsky and Matheson say?" "I don't know." "There's this guy, Sa?" "I something' selling weed who Works with some g?" "y, Dale Denton." "That's all he got out of him." "Do yo?" "think he has anything to do with the guy that We shot?" "Well' did he say anything else?" "Sa?" "I mentioned something about "going to the casino."" " Weird." " "Going to the casino"?" "The Asians own the casino' Ted." " I need another beer." " ?" "e's gotta be working for them." "Maybe affer we popped that guy, they hired this outside guy, Dale..." "What's his name?" "Denton?" " To finish the job." "Maybe." "Maybe." "Well, I'll be back in an hour." "I'll have everything there is to know about this Dale Denton guy." "Who he's screwing' who's his mother, everything." "I have to take a shit." "Wait." "Where are We going?" "I gotta..." "I gotta get to Angie's." "I have to make s?" "re she's okay." "What abo?" "t my bubbe?" "Don't think they'll go after her." "I mean, she has a difterent last name." "Belog?" "s." "I don't know." "We sho?" "ld get o?" "t of the middle of the road." "Come on." "Yo?" "guys can wait as long as you want but one min?" "te from right now, I'm gonna eat some food." "And you can call it rude." "Yo?" "can call it Whatever yo?" "want." "Yo?" "can be polite with yo?" "r clean plates' b?" "t I'm gonna be eating food." "Dad' he'll be here." "I'm going in the other room and eat it, check my e-mail." "I'm done." "?" "oney' we're at the table." "?" "o one's going to leave the table." " Okay." "This is it." " All right." "Let's do this." "?" "o, no, no." "I'm going alone." " ?" "o." " Yeah." "Yeah." " I wanna meet Angie." " You'll meet her later' man." "Look." "Look, I need yo?" "to stay out here." "Keep g?" "ard' okay?" " It's important." "Watch my back." " Okay." " Thanks." " All right." "Just be yo?" "rself." "I'll keep guard." "?" "ey." "Shit." "Oh' no." "?" "ey, Dale." " ?" "ello, Dale." " ?" "ey." "Dinner." "This is the dinner yo?" "invited me to." "That was tonight." "That's why I'm here." "Sit." "Please." "Of co?" "rse. ?" "i." " ?" "i." " Shannon." " Intros." " Great to meet yo?" "." " Robert' if I'm not mistaken." " Sit down, so We can eat." " ?" "i, Dale." " ?" "ey." "Okay." " What happened to you?" " ?" "othing." "I'm supposed to be here right now." "So I'm here." " You're all dirty and bleeding." " ?" "o, I'm not." "I'm here for dinner." " You have scratches on your forehead." " D?" "de' you smell like shit." " Dale' what happened to yo?" " I was in the woods." " In the Woods?" " Yeah." "Isn't that weird?" "I was..." " I was in the woods." " What were yo?" "doing?" "I bird-watch." "I don't." "?" "o, I don't." "Look, I'm gonna come clean." "I witnessed a murder, okay?" "I saw someone murder someone else and I think they've been following me." "There's a good chance they went to my apartment where Angie has a lot of things." "?" "er yearbooks, report cards' her cell n?" "mber is written and it's on my fridge." "So they co?" "ld then find this ho?" "se." "They could come here." "We sho?" "ld call the police right away." "We can't." "The police were the murderers." "We can't call the police." "They were the murderers." "Angie' I swear to God' yo?" "do something or I'm gonna..." " So f?" "cked up." " ?" "o." "Don't let him "gonna."" "?" "o, don't wanna." "Look, we gotta get the F out of here." "Let's go." "We need to begin to premat?" "rely evacuate." " Are you high?" " What?" "?" "o." "I'm not high." "Why...?" "Yo?" "are high as a fucking kite." "I'm not high." "Let's go." "We're not going." "I'm coming back in a min?" "te." "Yo?" "know what I'm coming back with?" "With a g?" "n." "Yo?" "better be o?" "t." "I'm not f?" "cking with you." "Yo?" "r gun?" "?" "is g?" "n?" "Why do you...?" "Don't get a gun." "Why Wo?" "ld he bear arms?" "?" "o, we need to go." "Everyone, I'm leading the parade." "I just want you to know, I always got your back." "And I'm glad we're partners." " This is so exciting." " Okay, okay." "Is this where you're parked?" "Let's sally forth." "Who is after you, after Angie?" "They're dr?" "g dealers." "I have reason to believe that they're drug dealers." "What are you talking about?" "Yo?" "'re out of your mind." " I know it sounds crazy." " ?" "ide." "Dale!" "Dale!" "Dale!" "It's happening." "I was eating a Fruit Roll..." " Why'd yo?" "do that?" " God!" " Get it!" " Jesus!" "Okay!" "J?" "st stop!" " Angie' What did you do?" " ?" "e's one of the drug dealers!" " ?" "e's my pot dealer." " ?" "e's your pot dealer?" " I got it." " Get it." " Gross." "Are yo?" "okay?" " Dale' who is this?" " ?" "e's my..." "Oh, shit." "Get down." " Dad!" "What was that?" "That was a gunshot." "Stop!" "Stop it!" "Stop it!" " ?" "e's with me." " I'm the good drug dealer." " Put the gun down!" " Put down the g?" "n." "Yo?" "assholes do exactly what I say or I will take you outside and f?" "ck you in the street." " ?" "o, don't." " Don't fuck us anywhere." " Where's yo?" "r gun?" " I don't need it." "Kill motherf?" "ckers With my hands." "Get out your goddamn gun." "Yo?" "'re making me uncomfortable." "Anybody o?" "t there?" "Fucking hide-and-seek." "Say, now." "?" "ey, the food's still warm." "Love it." "I found a bloody fork." "It's f?" "cking freaky, man." "They could still be here." "Did you check the rest of the house?" "I'm abo?" "t to check that bathroom, I know that m?" "ch." "Come on, Sa?" "I." "Come on." "Come on." "Come on." "Yes." "We made it." "We're all safe' guys." "We made it." " What are you doing?" " Get out." "Get out of my car." "I can't believe you think it's an option." "Okay." "Okay." "That makes sense." "It makes sense." "Come on, let's go." "It makes sense. ?" "e's right." " Stay away from my family." "Period." " So where do we go?" "What do we do?" "Go to the Days Inn downtown, okay?" "Use a fake name." "Garagely." "I'll contact you." "I don't know who these people are, what they're capable of but I Will keep you guys safe' I promise that." "Fuck off, loser." "Angie' you're a f?" "cking idiot." "I say that With love." "Okay, yo?" "call this Mocha Milkshake." "This one here, English Breeze." "Charge $40 for these." " Forty?" " Yeah." "This one, Da Vinci's Brush." "Call this one Bumble B?" "sh." "And this here' Spanish Trampoline." "Crazy With them names' ain't you, T?" "What the f?" "ck is...?" "What is it, Spanish...?" "Spanish Trampoline." "Used to call it Spanish M?" "dflaps but Troy likes to trampoline so Spanish Trampoline." " Almost the same n?" "mber of syllables." " ?" "ow much?" " Forty-five for these last three." " All right." " And leave me the best stash." " All right." "It's Pineapple Express." "Get your ass ?" "p." "Yup' of course." "So get this:" "We triang?" "lated the cells." "They smashed one, threw the other in the woods to try to distract us." "It took an hour for Jared to find it." "And then he said that he fo?" "nd Denton's car filled with all these strange disg?" "ises." "A powdered wig, a sombrero' leotards." "I mean, What the fuck does that mean?" "Why don't I just call the Asians and talk to Cheung?" "Why beat aro?" "nd the b?" "sh, yo?" "know?" "?" "ello?" "Cheung, it's Ted." "Record this conversation." "Ted, what a surprise." "What can I do for you?" "Well' Cheung' my friend, let me tell yo?" "." "Yo?" "know, we both know that yo?" "sent one of your very skilled hit men over here last night, and I and my colleague made a little decoration on o?" "r window." "Should have seen it." "We painted the wall with his brain." "Painted it." "And now this Dale Denton guy?" "Yo?" "serious?" "Just stop it' okay?" "Stop it or you're asking for war." "Do you Want a War?" " What?" " What?" " ?" "ello?" " Troy?" "Dad!" "Get off the phone." "I told you I'm gonna call some hot bitches later and this is the time." " I got yo?" "your own line so you wo?" "ld stay off mine." "Get off the phone." "Don't talk to me like that." "I'm not a little kid, I'm a man!" "And from this point forward, I'm not taking any of your fucking shit." "I love you, Dad, but the dynamic in our relationship is about to change." "Troy, do me a favor' get oft the fucking phone!" " Shit." " So you have a son." "So?" "nds like a very nice boy." "All right, you listen to me, Cheung, you motherfucker!" "It is on!" "We're coming at you with everything we got!" "It's on, so you better get your head o?" "t of your ass and be ready for everything!" "Yo?" "are f?" "cking dead!" "Yo?" "are so dumb." "Do yo?" "have any idea how Weak you just made ?" "s look?" "Goddamn it!" "Totally sweet." "Ted Jones is slipping." "We shall strike now with full force." "Yo?" "r brother's death will not be in vain." "I gotta say, I've had, like, a lot of weed dealers in my day." "Yo?" "'re the coolest I've ever had." "They were all dicks." " Really?" "Thanks' man." " ?" "o problem." "I really appreciate it." "That means a lot to me." "It's' like, you're the first guy that I ever sold to that I became friends with." "They say, like, "Don't dip the pen in company ink."" "I'm totally glad I dipped in your ink, bro." "Yeah." "We sho?" "ld get out of town." "That's probably our next move." "Just get on a bus and leave, right?" "Get bus tickets." "Go to the next town." "Contact some police." "Yo?" "know what I was saying?" "Like, I'm totally..." "Yo?" "'re glad yo?" "dipped yo?" "r pen in my ink." "But We should get bus tickets and leave, right?" "What?" "Get on the bus?" "Leave?" "Buy b?" "s tickets?" "I only have' like, 50 b?" "cks." "I don't think that'll even buy one ticket." "What abo?" "t yo?" "r sack?" "Oh' man' it's f?" "cking killing me." "I feel like I popped one." "?" "o." "That's ?" "nfort?" "nate, b?" "t that's not what I'm talking abo?" "t." "I mean, like' the sack of weed." "Couldn't we just, like, sell some weed get some cash and buy b?" "s tickets?" " Of co?" "rse, man." "That's what I do." " That's what you do." "F?" "cking A." "Okay, so you're gonna b?" "y tickets for Saturday's game, right?" "These guys are amazing." "What the f?" "ck do yo?" "want?" "Yo?" "guys wanna buy some chronic?" "What's this stuff called again?" "Pineapple Express." "They said it eight times." " Yeah, b?" "t don't call it that." " Yeah, that's not what it's called." " Call it Banana Boat." " Make sure you leave it at Weed too." "This can be a gateway dr?" "g." "Don't wanna move on to other things." " Cocaine." "Don't do that." " We don't f?" "ck around." " Don't worry." "Don't tell ?" "s what to do." " Inhale it, Chachi." "Inhale it." "Who the f?" "ck's Chachi?" " ?" "ow much money you guys got?" " Come on." "Yo?" "each get as much as yo?" "can grab with one hand." "Go easy." "That's a big handful, g?" "ys." "Come on." " Keep it on the down-low." " Don't tell anybody where you got it." "Yo?" "got it from Saul..." "I mean' you got it from Santiago and D?" "nbar." " Go." "Come on." " Go' go." "Vamoose!" "Yo?" "fucking did it, man." "Yo?" "are a good salesman." "Yo?" "got it in you, man." "I'm abo?" "t to go get some celebratory Sl?" "shees." "Get some burritos or something." "Something to drink too." "Something good." "See you' man. ?" "ice." "Don't move." "Don't yo?" "move." "This shit h?" "rts." "Don't move." "What's in your hand?" "It's Weed." "It's a joint." "It's a roach." " Right here." " I was j?" "st smoking..." "I thought it was decriminalized' to be honest with you." "I have horrible anorexia, and it helps my appetite." "I'm so sorry." "Look, selling narcotics to my students is not decriminalized." " Okay." "I ?" "nderstand." " I'm the liaison officer for this school." "And guess what?" "I j?" "st saw three students Walking from back here with their eyes as red as the devil's dick." "You're b?" "sted." " On the hood." "On the hood." " Okay, okay." "I'm on the hood." "Come on." " Stand still." "Stand still." " I'm still." "I'm sorry." "Yo?" "better hope it's clean." "Better hope ain't shit on this record." "I'm gonna put my foot up in your ass." "Oh' big sexy with glasses." "This is Ofticer Barbara." "Requesting an update on fugitive Dale Denton." "I repeat, req?" "esting update on Dale Denton." "I have the fugitive in custody." "425, 425' what's your location?" "Yo?" "going down." "What?" "What do you mean...?" "Why am I going down?" "What did that thing tell yo?" "What are you doing?" "What did I tell you?" "What did I tell you?" "I wasn't doing things." "Why do you hate me so much?" "?" "it-and-run' Mr. Denton." "?" "it-and-run." "Two parked cars, two nights ago." "One of them Was act?" "ally a police cr?" "iser." "Yo?" "gotta be the d?" "mbest motherfucker in captivity." "It's the lady cop." "They got Dale." "Oh' shit." "So yo?" "'re telling me yo?" "saw Ted Jones and a police officer shoot somebody?" " Exactly." " And you saw it?" " Yes, do you believe me?" " Give me a min?" "te." " It was a Woman or a man?" " It was a policewoman." "A woman." " I think I know who that bitch Was." " Yes." "I will identify that bitch." "Thank yo?" "so much for believing me, ma'am." "Thank yo?" "." "I'll tell yo?" ", I'll get to the bottom of it." "I'll take this badge off, get to the bottom of it." "I don't work for the law." "The law Works for me." "I been smelling something in this department." "Keep yo?" "r eyes on the road." " Gonna get to the bottom of this shit." " Stop!" "Son of a bitch!" "Oh' no." "What the hell was that?" "What is that?" "?" "o, no, no." " ?" "o." "What are you doing?" " I'm saving you, amigo!" "Freeze, goddamn it!" "Don't even think abo?" "t it!" "This is an old-fashioned escape mission' buddy." "Stop this car!" " What the fuck are you doing?" " Oh' shit!" "Oh, shit!" "Oh' shit!" "Oh' shit!" "It's the lady cop!" "That's the murderer!" "Go!" " That's the lady cop." " Who's that?" "I don't know." "They're shooting!" "Oh' my God' they're shooting!" "Fuck." "D?" "de!" "I can't see!" "The Sl?" "shee!" " Turn on the Wipers!" " It's not working!" "Well' kick o?" "t the window!" " ?" "ow do yo?" "drive with one foot?" " I don't know!" "Fuck!" "I think I p?" "lled my groin!" "Get your foot out of there." "She's gaining on us." "She's behind ?" "s." "?" "er car's better." " Get your leg out of there." "Serio?" "sly." " I can't." "Put it into maximum overdrive!" "Oh' no' no' no!" "Oh' shit!" "Get it out!" "I can't see!" "Danger!" "Danger!" "Trees!" "Tree' tree!" "Squirrel!" "?" "ey, I can see through my leg hole." "?" "ice!" "Look out!" "Tree' tree, tree!" "Yo?" "did it, man." "All right!" "Look out!" "Oh' shit!" "Turn aro?" "nd!" "Turn aro?" "nd!" "I'm scared, Sa?" "I." "I'm scared." " Don't worry." "I'm handling this." " Do something." "All right, hold on." "I got an idea." "Oh' shit!" "Oh, shit!" "Go!" "Go!" "Go!" "Go!" "Sorry!" "What the f?" "ck Was that?" "Fuck." "I'm sorry." "I thought she'd j?" "st go past." " Why?" " I don't know." "Oh' my." "Yes!" "Yes!" "We made it!" "All right, man." " Let's get the fuck o?" "t of here." " ?" "o." "What are you doing?" "Yo?" "forgot me, you idiot!" "Come back!" "Come back!" "Saul!" " Sorry' man." " Thank yo?" "." " Let's go." " Wait." "Get the handc?" "ff keys, yo?" "idiot." "I haven't used a gun since ?" "am." "Angie' you have exhibited poor decision-making skills." "Oh' this is my fa?" "It." "And we have hosted violence in o?" "r home because of it." " "?" "osted violence"?" " ?" "e's a bad guy." "Yo?" "don't see that yo?" "have stooped way' way below..." " You lowered yo?" "r expectations..." "...of what yo?" "are worthy of." "...but this guy is so far beneath you." "Yo?" "deserve much better." "Open your heart to someone who deserves you." "Or don't have a boyfriend at all for a while." " We're stuck in this room." " I love him." " It's not yo?" "r decision." " Love him?" " You don't know What love is." " I'm gonna date him." " We're going to the police." " That's what I said." " I know." " ?" "e said not to go to the police." " You should listen." "He's a lawyer." " You come with us." " ?" "e can't possibly work in law." " I'm not going anywhere." " You stay." " We're leaving." " You stay in the room." " Fine, go." "Fine, go." "And we don't need the shampoos." "Why did...?" "As soon as we kill those sacks of shit tonight, Ted I'm moving on." "Okay." "All right." "And I promise yo?" "yo?" "'re gonna be taken care of." "As s?" "re as shit you will." "For now, this is what we're gonna do." "We're gonna go to the farm tonight' we're gonna move tonight's shipment." "Then tomorrow morning' we're gonna hunt these guys down." "Dale, Sa?" "I, the Asians." "Every last one of them." "We're gonna f?" "cking kill them all." "So smile." "Sh?" "t up." "Say something in Spanish." "Go ahead." "I dare yo?" "." "Go ahead." "All right." "Are you using protection?" " Days Inn." " Yes." "May I have the Garagely room, please?" " ?" "ello?" " Hello, is Angie there?" " Dale." " Angie?" " My God' are yo?" "okay?" " I'm good." "I'm fine." "I'm great." " Are you okay?" " Yes, I'm fine." "Okay, good." "I came up with a plan." "It might sound weird at first, b?" "t j?" "st listen." "Dale." "Yo?" "know what?" "Drug dealers..." "Let me tell you something." "Dr?" "g dealers are trying to kill me." "And you." "And my family." "I can't believe I'm in this situation right now because of you and your addiction to marijuana." "I cannot believe I'm here." "I can't be addicted to marijuana." "A, I ?" "se a bong." "It filters o?" "t the addictive shit." "Serio?" "sly." "B, what does that have to do with anything?" "I witnessed murder." "And now I'm dealing With it." "This, that's happening between us, this is normal." "This happens to every co?" "ple dating for three months." " We have to work through it." " ?" "o." "This doesn't happen to anyone." "I should not be in this sit?" "ation' so f?" "ck you." "You know what?" "It's over." "Good." "Fine." "Whatever." "It's over." "Congratulations. ?" "ad to happen sometime, right?" "Why not now?" "What the f?" "ck does that mean?" "It means that you are gonna go to college next year." "You'll get into Godspeed ?" "ou!" "Black Emperor and the fucking Shins." "And you'll blow a bunch of dudes and become a lesbian and I'll be here in fucking Clark County doing shit-all." "You're gonna dump me." "So, fuck it, have a good time." "A lesbian?" "Fuck yo?" "' Dale!" "You never did like me anyway, did you?" "You didn't wanna meet my parents." "I always cared about you." "That's not what this is." "Okay?" "I always care abo?" "t yo?" "." "Why don't yo?" "ever act like it, h?" "h?" "Why do you never act like yo?" "care about anything?" "Beca?" "se I'm high!" "F?" "ck!" "And it..." "What do yo?" "want...?" "Okay." "Jesus." "Call me when I can go home." "Yo?" "lost it playing Bid Whist?" "Yo?" "pimp." "?" "o, I'll give you more, b?" "t yo?" "cannot gamble with it." "I know' I'm sorry about the clocks." "I co?" "ldn't remember if it was today or tomorrow." "All right, I gotta go." "I love you." "Yo?" "wise-ass." "?" "ey, you all right' man?" "That so?" "nded pretty hectic." "I'm okay." "Let's just get the fuck out of here." "First things first." " Don't do that' okay?" " Yeah." "Why not?" "Why not?" "Car chase' gunshots." "That clearly just happened beca?" "se we were smoking marijuana." "?" "o, man." "It happened because those kids co?" "ldn't keep their shit on the down-low." "In case yo?" "haven't noticed..." "Which you haven't." "From what I can tell, yo?" "don't notice anything ever." " We are not very f?" "nctional when we're high." "Which is all the time." "Well' I don't know, man." "I think I'm functioning right noW." "I was, like' stoned when I saved yo?" "with those Slushees." "What do yo?" "gotta say to that?" "Well' that would be true if you had saved me." "But you didn't save me." "She was gonna help' yo?" "made things Worse." "We're wanted for all sorts of crazy shit." "Don't fucking get on my case' all right?" "Only reason I started selling pot is so I co?" "ld p?" "t my bubbe in a nice retirement home." " She m?" "st be pro?" "d of you." " She is pro?" "d of me." "I'm gonna become something." "As soon as she dies, I'm gonna become a civil engineer." "I'm gonna design septic tanks for playgrounds." "Little kids can take shits." "Yo?" "idiot." "What the hell do you do?" "What am I gonna do?" "Besides stay in my home for fear that you've designed some object I'm around?" "I'm gonna be on the radio, talking abo?" "t life." " Giving lessons about life." " Put me in my place." "I'm gonna be designing buildings and what's he doing?" "Boring people to death on the radio." "Yo?" "are an asshole." "That's all you are." "Yo?" "'re an asshole." " I'm not an asshole." " You are an asshole." "I feel pretty s?" "re that I'm not an asshole." "I'm, like' a totally nice guy." "I'm just as nice as yo?" "are." "So don't bring that out." "In the woods, I gave you my jacket." "Yo?" "were cold and I clothed you." "?" "ow about in the park when I said that yo?" "were my friend?" "Yo?" "didn't say anything back." "Well' that's easy." "It's beca?" "se we're not friends." "Yo?" "are my dr?" "g dealer." "There's one reason we know each other." "I like the drugs you sell." "That's it." "If yo?" "didn't sell those drugs' I would have no idea who you Were and I would be fantastic right now." "Instead of looking like this." "That so?" "nded mean." "Just hearing it so?" "nded mean." " I didn't mean to say..." " It's out." "Monkey's o?" "t of the bottle' man." "What?" "That's not even an expression." "Pandora doesn't go back in the box." "?" "e only comes out." "I'm sorry, man." "Look..." " What are you doing?" " ?" "ere. ?" "ave a nice last meal." "Come on, man." "Don't do that." "Why don't yo?" "supersize it, bitch?" "I'm sorry, man." "Look, come back." "I didn't mean that." "I love you." "Do you love me?" "That looks great." "?" "ello?" "Dale?" "It is Dale." "Angie' I'm calling because I love you more than anything in the World and I wanna let yo?" "know I'll do anything to make it work." "I'll do anything." "I've had a near-death experience' and when that happens yo?" "can prioritize yo?" "r life, and yo?" "are it' okay?" "So please just take me back, please." " I love you." " I love yo?" "." " Yeah?" " I just don't wanna lose you, Dale." "We were driving away from the house and I just kept thinking..." "I don't know." "I just..." "I wanna marry yo?" "." "I made a mistake." " What do you mean?" " I've..." " What?" " I'm just processing that last bit." " You wanna..." "Oh, fuck." " What?" "I don't know." "I realize now that if you Wo?" "ld take me back then you are very naive and immature." "Yo?" "don't see what a f?" "ck-up I am." "I'm in no shape to be dated by anyone." " You're the one that's immature." " I'm not immature. ?" "ou're immature." "I am somewhat immature, but you're more immature." "I'm older." "Just beca?" "se you're older." "I lost my virginity when I was 14 years old." " Really?" " ?" "ow many girls have yo?" "slept with?" " Like, two and a half." " Two and a half?" "What is a half?" "Yo?" "r hand?" "No, it was the tip or I dipped a ball in." "I can't remember why." "I remember thinking, "This doesn't count as a full point."" "If I said three, I'd feel like a liar." "I was drunk." "Screw you." "Get me o?" "t of this room." "I will, and that's the last you'll ever hear from me, okay?" "Oh' thank goodness." "Okay." "Belog?" "s." "Faye Belog?" "s." "Lookit there." "Lookit there." "Do yo?" "use the pool over here?" "Yes, I ?" "se the pool." "Come on, what do you want from me?" "Yo?" "r grandson." "We need yo?" "to get on the phone with your grandson..." "What are you talking about' my grandson?" "Yo?" "told me you wanna sit down' play dominos with me." "And now yo?" "'re hocking me abo?" "t my grandson." " Is that Yiddish?" " Yes." "Yes, it is." "May I call you Faye?" "Yo?" "can call me Faye, b?" "t I'm gonna call you a stinker." "?" "ey, Mrs. Mendelson." "What do yo?" "want from me?" "Bubbe. ?" "ey, g?" "ys." " Well' look who it is." " ?" "ello, baby." "Damn." "Oh' shit." "Sorry' Betty." "They kidnapped my grandson." "Yeah, these two guys came in they sat down with me to play dominos." "I never saw them in my life before." "And they kept asking questions abo?" "t my grandson." " What did they look like?" " One of them was very tall and sloppy." "And the other g?" "y' he was very good-looking but he was short as shit." "But the Worst part was that my grandson came in' why, and in pajamas." " You gotta find my grandson." " Do the best..." " Do you promise?" " I promise." "Absolutely." "Yo?" "'ve got something there." "I believe that's a mole' ma'am." "Yo?" "sack of shit." "Do yo?" "know what a pain in the ass you've been?" "?" "o, man." "I don't wanna get o?" "t." "Who gave yo?" "that lollipop?" "Let's go." "Where am I, man?" "What?" "Yo?" "guys started it, man." "I don't even wanna be here." "Shit." "Did I do that?" "?" "ey, hey." "All right, okay." "Fuck yo?" ", man!" " Stand back." "Ted wants him alive." " Why yo?" "holding me back?" "Ted wants him alive, okay?" "I should be kicking his fucking teeth in." " Lf anybody's gonna beat him, it's Ted." " I look like ?" "amburglar." "And the Elephant Man." "Like someone fucked you up with a coffee pot." "Professional." "Professional." " Professional on this, bitch." " Whatever' man." " Where were yo?" " I was there." " Supposed to be my partner." " I was there." "?" "o, yo?" "wasn't." "?" "ow did this happen?" "I take the hit?" "That's how it's gonna be?" "Fuck all this' you know?" "Get him out of here." "Take him downstairs." "Get this asshole out of my sight." "I don't wanna go near this g?" "y." "What's down there?" "Fucking rancor?" "I might act to?" "gh but I got a lot of feelings." "And you hurt damn near every one of them." "This ain't over." " You know you gonna die, right?" " Yeah." "I'm gonna kill the fuck o?" "t of you." "I hope you enjoy these last 17 minutes of yo?" "r life beca?" "se when Ted gets here' he's gonna be like:" ""Kill that motherfucker." I'm gonna kill your motherf?" "cking ass." "Watch yo?" "r head." "?" "ey, watch him." "Oh' my God." "El Dorado." "The legends are true." "Look at all this weed, man." "What's that?" "Purple Granddaddy?" " Come on." " Purple Nurple?" "OG Kush?" "OG Kush." "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." " What kind of irrigation...?" " Shut up." " Can I touch it?" " Come here." "?" "ello?" "Red?" " Red?" " What the fuck?" "Get out of here' man." "I didn't do shit, Denton." "Look, I come in peace' okay?" "I'm not here to fight you again." "Good." "Beca?" "se I'm tired' man." "?" "ot feeling so hot." "Yo?" "don't look great." "They shot me, Denton." "They got me right here." " Yeah?" " Right here." "And then they got me again right here." "Look, man, I'll call 911 right now." "They'll save your life' okay?" " You don't need to die." " ?" "o, bro." "Yo?" "don't get it." "It doesn't really matter Where I'm at." "If I'm at the hospital, if I'm here Ted's gonna find me, man." "?" "e will." "And when he does' he's gonna f?" "cking kill me." "?" "e's just, like' an asshole." "I co?" "ldn't agree more' Red." "That's why I've come here, okay?" "Yo?" "know Ted?" "?" "e took Sa?" "I." "And I'm gonna get him back." "Yo?" "know, like, he saved my life." "We've been on the run together." "?" "e's a great friend." "A good guy." "?" "e is." "I'll tell you that' man." "Sa?" "I is a good d?" "de." "I was mean to him' man." "I wronged him and I can't..." "I can't let it end like that." "I'm just into B?" "ddhism and I'm at peace with the fact that me as this person, probably gonna not be around." "Think abo?" "t a hermit crab, okay?" "And it's a shell' and it's like they go from one shell to the next." "And that's what I am." "It's like I'm just a hermit crab changing shells." "Except' if yo?" "'re a dick yo?" "r Whole life yo?" "r next shell will be made of shit' okay?" "If yo?" "'re an asshole, yo?" "'re gonna come back as a cockroach." "Or a Worm, or a fucking anal bead, okay?" "If yo?" "'re a man' and yo?" "act heroic yo?" "'ll come back as an eagle." "Yo?" "'ll come back as a dragon." "Yo?" "'ll come back as Jude Law." "Okay?" "Which would yo?" "rather be?" "Maybe the anal bead." "Might..." "Depending on who it belongs to." "It belongs to me." " Then the dragon." " Exactly." "Yo?" "need to help me, okay?" "Just ?" "se it' you know?" "Use the pain." "Yo?" "'ll have a second wind." "Let's get up and go get Sa?" "I back." "Use it." " Aren't you angry at Ted?" " Yeah, I'm really mad at him." "What do yo?" "wanna do?" "Don't yo?" "wanna get ?" "p, do something about it?" "Maybe that would be cool to do to him." "I don't think "maybe" is the answer." "I think' "Yes, I'm gonna help you' Dale" that's the answer I'm looking for." "Come here." "Ted Jones messed with the wrong melon farmers." "Th?" "g life." "Oh' shit." "Get those." "I don't wanna run them over in the vacu?" "m and shoot my face off, okay?" " I'm sorry." "I ?" "sed to use this little gun when I was a prostit?" "te." "Don't." "Just something quick like that." " Don't." " Yeah." " Don't." "You stop it right now." " Stop it." "Oh' God." "That's a big hideo?" "t." "I can't do this." "I'm sorry." "I can't do this." "I'm infected." "My shit's all fucked up." "I need medical attention." "What?" "I thought we just got all p?" "mped up." "What was that abo?" "t?" "Ted is a fucking m?" "rderer." "I can't f?" "ck With him." "I got a wife." "She's gonna be o?" "t of jail soon." "I wanna f?" "ck her." "I am not gonna wake ?" "p murdered tomorrow." "Oh' man' no." "This is lame of yo?" ", man." "Come on." "This co?" "ld be yo?" "r moment of redemption." "This could be your moment." "I don't want a moment." "I don't want..." "Fine' go." "Fuck yo?" "." "Please come back for me." "Please come back." "Legends never die' dude." "I'll tell yo?" "r story." "Carol' she's cool now." "Carol used to be a little crazy' man." "She used to throw tickle parties." " Sounds like home-cooking to me." " That was fun." "Game over, motherf?" "ckers!" "Everybody freeze!" "Tell me where my friend is or this guy gets it!" "All right, everybody be cool' man." "Be cool." "Put your g?" "ns down." "?" "obody shoots." "Put them down." "On the gro?" "nd." "All right, everybody just chill." "Oh' my God!" " You shot him." " Put the gun down." " Drop the fucking gun." " Don't shoot me!" " ?" "oly shit." " I said, nobody shoot." "You shot Pete." "That's right." "I shot him." "I shot him." "I shot him." "I don't have time for a fucking negotiation." "?" "ow' I wanna finish this off so I can go home and have dinner with my wife for once." "If anybody asks, Denton killed Pete." "End of story." "I'm telling Ted." " Lf yo?" "do..." " ?" "e's got a piece." " Motherfucker." " Okay, I'm sorry." "?" "e's got another one' in the side." "Damn it." "I got one more on my leg." "There's one more." "I know you'll find it." "Take it." "I'm sorry, g?" "ys." "Sorry I deceived yo?" "." "?" "o." "Come on." " Oh' great." " Saul." " Dale." " Yes." "What did you do, rat me o?" "t?" "Is that what you did' you bastard?" " ?" "o, man." " Yes." "I'm here to save you." "?" "o." "Yo?" "j?" "st got caught too." "And I'm gonna die in here with some asshole." "Okay, yo?" "know what?" "I deserved that." "I'll take that beca?" "se I have been an asshole' man." "This whole thing is my fault." "I ruined yo?" "r life." "Okay?" "And I know there's no way to make that ?" "p to yo?" "except by saving your life." "So that's What I came here to do." "I'm here to save my best friend." "Beca?" "se that's what you are." "Yo?" "'re my best friend." "Yo?" "'re a mean jerk." "I was mean." "I was mean because, I think..." "I didn't Want yo?" "to be my best friend." "I didn't Wanna think that that's what my life was." "?" "ow I realize I'm l?" "cky to have you as my best friend." "Yo?" "'re the best g?" "y I know." "BFFF." "Best f?" "cking friends forever, man." "Seriously." " All right." "Give me a h?" "g." " Yeah." "Okay." "Thanks, man." "I'm so sorry abo?" "t everything." "Oh' I'm such a dick." " Okay." "I'm gonna get ?" "s o?" "t." " ?" "o, you're not, but it's okay." "These guys are gonna fucking kill ?" "s." "We gotta get out of here." " I know." "They are." " Fuck, man." "We can hear you outside and it's very fucking annoying, all right?" " Okay." "Sorry about that' sir." " Shut the fuck up." "Do yo?" "know what "sh?" "t the fuck up" mean?" "I do." "Shit." "Stupid motherfuckers." "Yes." "Okay." "I got an idea." "I got an idea." "My belt buckle." "My belt b?" "ckle." "Right here." "Okay?" "R?" "b yo?" "r wrists against my belt buckle." "That'll do it." " Is it Working?" " I can't feel it." "I can't feel you." " Wait, I feel it." " I feel it." "Yes' okay." " Okay." " Okay." "Okay." " I'm gonna save you' man." " Yeah." "Yeah." " Let me save you." " Save me' Dale." "It's not Working." "We gotta change angles." "We gotta get more leverage-y." "Okay." "Okay, that's good." "That's good." "Get your hands up on it." "There we go." " All right." "All right." " Yeah." "Okay." " Yes." "Yes." " Okay." "I'm gonna save you' man." "I'm gonna save you." " You're my best friend, man." " Yeah, see?" " It's not working." " Let me use my..." "I'll use my mo?" "th." "Finish it off with my mouth' pal." "Let's go." "Come on." "Let's go." "?" "arder." " Where are these fuckers?" " We got them downstairs." " Where did you find them?" " Fo?" "nd Saul at his grandmother's." "?" "e fucked up Matheson's face." "?" "it him with a pot of hot coffee." "It's gross." "Dale Denton comes flying in here like a madman armed to the teeth, and' as yo?" "can see' he shot Peter." "Pl?" "gged him, just whacked him." "?" "ow they're both disarmed and they're downstairs." "?" "e shot Pete?" "Fucking Pete?" "?" "e was ex-CIA." "Who the f?" "ck is this Dale Denton?" "Who is he?" "Where did he come from?" "I do not know." "Time to cook shit up tonight." "Take his stash and burn this motherfucker down." "Stop." "Wait here." "?" "o retreat, no surrender." "Yes, yes, yes." " Wait, someone's coming." " Okay, okay' okay." "If I cough once, I'll take the lead." "If I cough twice' you go, okay?" "Well..." "I cough sometimes for real." "Just don't." "Don't..." "Yo, look." "I'm gonna say this one time." "Whatever you're doing, I get it, okay?" "Stop." "See' I don't think yo?" "understood me." "I can hear everything yo?" "'re saying." "One co?" "gh mean you go." "Two co?" "gh mean you take the lead." "The belt buckle." "Best friends forever." "Y'all fuck on your own time' man." "Sorry' man." "It was a stupid plan." "What the f?" "ck is that?" "Dale!" "I've been Waiting for this." "Yo?" "burned my face!" "I'm gonna tear this ass ?" "p." "Yo?" "shot me." "I'm sorry, man." "I've never been shot." "Damn, that hurt." "I got glass in my ass." " Dale." "Dale!" " This is messed up." "?" "as anyone seen my bigger knife?" "Asians!" "War is upon you!" "Prepare to s?" "ck the cock of karma!" "Get down' motherfucker!" "Come on!" "Fuck!" "Go!" "Go!" "Get down' baby!" "Dale, no!" "?" "o, wake ?" "p, man." "?" "o, yo?" "'re not dying, man." "?" "ot without me." " Dale." " What?" "Yo?" "'re alive." " You're..." "You're alive." " What happened?" " ?" "e got your ear, man." " ?" "e got my What?" " ?" "e got your ear." " Fuck!" "Fuck!" " ?" "elp!" " My ear." " Yeah." " ?" "elp!" " You killed my ear." " You shot me." " I didn't do that." " ?" "e shot me." "Yo?" "shot him?" " Get your hands off of me." " Shut up." "We've had enough o?" "t of you." "I'm not yo?" "r friend." "Maybe I can j?" "st... ?" "o. ?" "o, infected." "Is that it?" "Maybe if we j?" "st hold it." "It's clear." "D?" "de." "Look." "?" "ice." "Bullets." "So serio?" "sly, how gross does my ear look?" "Is it really disg?" "sting or is it' like, kind of cool in a Way?" "Right now it's pretty disgusting." "I feel like I can smell it." "Don't worry, bro." "Think abo?" "t Evander ?" "olyfield." "Yo?" "can't even tell." "That's a good point." "Wait." "Did you shoot that guy?" "?" "o." "I'm out of b?" "llets." "Me too." "Maybe it was ricochet." "Gravity." "Oh' nice." "Yo?" "go down." "I'll cover." "Watch my back." "I'll go down and take care of this." "Sexy motherfucker." "?" "o, no, there might be more bad g?" "ys ?" "p there." "?" "o, we'll sneak out through the vent." "Come on." "I'll boost you ?" "p, okay?" "And then yo?" "p?" "ll me up." "Oh' nice." "?" "ere we go." "Okay." "Get up." "Yeah. ?" "ice." "?" "ice." "?" "ice." "Okay." "Pull me up." "I'm ready." "Go." " Give it to me." " Come on." " Be taller." " Be stronger." " Pull harder." " Dale' come on." "Pull." "P?" "ll me." "Come on, man." " I'm jumping as high as I can." " Denton!" "Dale!" "I'll get help." "I'll get help." "Go ahead and run' you little dipshit." "I'll find yo?" "." "Give me that fire extinguisher." "Okay." "Yo?" "and me, baby." "Drop it now!" "P?" "t the bag down!" "?" "ow!" "Fuck yo?" "!" "Fuck the police!" "Motherfucking kill you!" " Why yo?" "doing this to me?" " Why yo?" "doing this to me?" "Oh' shit!" "Come here!" "I hate you!" "?" "o!" "Ted, stop it!" "Come on, bitch." "Come on, I'll twist your balls so tight." "Yo?" "'re in the jungle now, baby." "Jesus!" "Fuck." "Gonna die." " You killed..." " I didn't wanna do that." "But you weren't gonna stop." "Shoot him!" "Just take it easy, buddy." "Shoot him, yo?" "d?" "mb fuck!" "I'm hungry." "I'm going home." "All right." "?" "elp." "I knew you were going soft." "Dinner's gonna be cold tonight, asshole." "Fucked up, man." " Well' lookie here." "Mr. Folgers." " Oh' man." "What's ?" "p, sir?" " Look, I didn't Wanna hit you' man..." " Shut the fuck up." "Yo?" "think yo?" "was gonna get me, motherf?" "cker' h?" "h?" "Yo?" "need to sit yo?" "r little sexy ass down and watch yourself get killed now." "All right." "Yo?" "know what?" "This is how it's gonna be?" "All right." "This is how it ends." "Yo?" "j?" "st got killed by a Daewoo Lanos, motherf?" "cker." "?" "ow you like me now, huh?" "Gross." "Red?" "Sa?" "I." "?" "ey, Saul." "I came back for you' bro." " Yeah." " I remembered' man." "Bro's before ho's." " You lied to me." " I did." "I lied bigtime to you." "Dale said that yo?" "didn't even have herpes and I said that yo?" "did." "?" "onestly, like' from now on, from everything that we've gone through and' like, from seeing this asshole's n?" "ts smashed with my daewoo I Wanna be a better friend to you' like I really am." "I f?" "cking love you' dog." "Fucking love you." "I wanna be inside you, homes." "?" "o more lies, Red." " This is my moment." " This is yo?" "r moment." "Red!" "Yo?" "know what?" "I'm feeling it." "Red' I'm coming, baby." "Yo?" "r st?" "pidity amazes me." "?" "ey, Ted!" "Yo?" "killed my brother Ca?" "casian son of cocksucker!" "Suck my balls!" "two times!" "Bitch!" "Bring it on." "Shit." "Dale." "Dale!" "?" "oly shit!" "Sorry' Ted." "Yo?" "'ve been served." "Oh' shit." "Oh, shit." "Oh, shit." "Sa?" "I!" "Sa?" "I!" "Wake up, man!" "This place is gonna collapse!" "Come on!" "Come to me!" "Yo?" "'re not dying today, friend." "?" "ot on my watch." "Sa?" "I." "Wake ?" "p, man, please." "Sa?" "I." "Wake up." "Oh' sweet Sa?" "I." "Sa?" "I." "Yes." "Yeah." "Sa?" "I, yo?" "made it." " What?" " Yeah." "Where am I?" "Yo?" "made it' man." " You saved me." " You came back for me." " Yeah." " Oh' thank you." "What happened?" "?" "oly shit." "What's that?" "?" "i." " Red?" " Red?" " Red." " ?" "ey." "Red." "Where'd you come from, man?" "Where'd he come from?" "?" "e came back to save us." " ?" "e saved us?" " Yeah." "All right, man." " We all saved each other." " Yeah." "Oh' man." "We made it, g?" "ys." "We made it." "Oh, we made it." "Hello, you're listening to PPRPBP." "I am Dale Denton." "The topic of the day:" "New beginnings." "Getting over losses." "Friends." "Life." "We have o?" "r first caller." "Yes, ring-ring-ring. ?" "ow's it going?" "?" "i." "Am I on the air?" "Yo?" "are." "You're about to get D'd by the Dale." "A D in the face." " Dale Denton?" " Yeah?" "Yo?" "'re my hero." "Yo?" "are good, man." "Seriously." " Thanks." " Gotta admit, you're pretty good." " It so?" "nds pretty good." " It so?" "nds real." " It's not bad' huh?" " Lf I close my eyes' it so?" "nds like..." " You are on the radio." " That's the radio." "That's a DJ." " Lf yo?" "were on it' I would listen to it." " Thanks, man." "It's like when my bubbe was always playing opera I hated it, b?" "t my bubbe loves it." "Then it grows on yo?" "." "It grows on yo?" "." "Yeah." "It's like Red." "I didn't like Red when I first met him." " You didn't like me?" " You liked him so much I like you now." "I know this so?" "nds weird, but can we be best friends?" "J?" "st us, for real?" " We should all be best friends." " We should." "Seriously." "You guys are' like, both of my best friends." "Yo?" "didn't know it. ?" "ow you know it, we'll all be best friends." "Know those hearts that break ?" "p, "best friends"?" "We sho?" "ld get a three-way one." " I don't know if they make those." " We should make the first one." "I want the middle piece' so it'll be crooked on both sides." "I know We've gone over this, b?" "t, like' 1000 pardons' 1000 pardons, please." " I fucked up..." " I was a dick to you, man." "I'm sorry." "I know I was an asshole." "I hope I redeemed myself." " I know me and you had o?" "r deal." " We've had some times." "I feel like something's happening here." "Is that a boner?" "Is that a condo?" "That us moving into an apartment together?" "Is that us getting a time-share?" " You threw an ashtray at his face." " You hit me, man." "At the time, I was like:" "But it was kind of funny." "Yo?" "hit me with a DustBuster' man." "I didn't Wanna hurt you." "It was like' "Yo?" "better not leave here."" " That was s?" "ch a good fight, man." " That was." "Yo?" "fuckhead." " The car chase was awesome." " You got into a car chase?" " Are you kidding me?" "Oh' my God." " Yeah, it was..." "I, like' had my foot through the window." "My groin..." "I mean, I felt like a wishbone." " I j?" "st feel different about everything." " Me too, man." "Everything." "Like, I never Wanna kill anybody else again." " Ever." " That's something yo?" "pretty m?" "ch..." "Yo?" "can just kind of dip your toes into." "We kind of dipped o?" "r toes into m?" "rder." "I killed six guys, I think." "?" "ow many g?" "ys did you...?" " We each shot several people." " A lot." "Some people get a taste for it' b?" "t I don't." "I shot someone who was already dead so that doesn't co?" "nt as a murder." "Apparently yo?" "hit him with your car, I'm told." " That..." "You killed him." " Okay, so I did murder somebody." " You m?" "rdered, man." " ?" "ot a big deal." "That's cool." " That's cool." "Whatever." "Kill or be killed." " I know." "I'm trying to decide how stoned I am and just how on the verge of death am I now." "Am I seeing shit because I'm stoned or beca?" "se I have no blood leff?" " You've been shot' like, seven times." " You gotta eat." " You're losing stuft." " Yeah." " ?" "ere." " Yeah, okay." " ?" "ere comes the airplane." " Look, like a baby." "It's a miracle." "I think We should all take a moment and think about what a miracle it is that we got out." "And that we became friends in the process and learned some shit about life and st?" "ff." "Should we to?" "ch each other's hands while We do it?" "Okay." "I love you g?" "ys." "I love you d?" "des so much." "I'll remember that for the rest of my life." " Red?" " Red?" "Yo, Red, man." "You alive?" "What's ?" "p, pal?" " ?" "ey." " ?" "ey." "I'm like the nerd at the sleepover who fell asleep at 9." "That's okay." "We Won't put o?" "r dicks in yo?" "r mouth." " Oh' God." " ?" "ey' there's bubbe." "Come on." "Let's get out of here." "Yeah, maybe we should go to the doctor." "Do yo?" "think she'll drive me to the hospital?" "Me too." "I sho?" "ld get the ear looked at." "My ear should probably get professional attention." " It is bad." " That's a bullet b?" "rp." "Either I'm getting ready to die or I'm gonna take a massive shit." "If somebody could get me to the hospital." "Blood from my ear just..." "Yo?" "guys smell like shit." "Yo?" "are in serio?" "s danger."