"Ma'am?" "What you looking like that at me fer?" "Excuse me." "I'm sorry." "I meant no harm." "They get sassier every day." "You give them an inch and they take miles." "Don't you know better, man, than to show them manners." "They is more comfortable standing." "Hmph." "5-minute stop." "Hey, boy, where you going?" "Hey, you boy!" "I'm talking to you!" "Where do you think you're going?" "Restroom." "What stop are you getting off at?" "Birling." "Then you get back in your seat and don't you move till we get there." "I can't be bothered running all you people up when we get ready to do." "Some of them got off." "Are you arguing with me?" "There ain't no call for him to act like that." "They usually lets us off here." "Did you hear me call you?" "No, sir, I sure didn't." "You deaf?" "No, sir, I ain't deaf." "You mean to stand there and tell me you didn't hear me call ya?" "No, sir." "Were you calling me?" "I heard you calling boy, but I didn't think you were calling me." "Hey, you." "I thought I told you to get back there..." "I'm getting off here." "Say, excuse me, could you tell me where I could find a room?" "You know anybody here?" "Not a soul." "I'm just hitchhiking through town." " Oh, a stranger." " Yeah." "Well, that's bad." "In this town you just can't go out and get a room just like that." "What about a hotel or a Y (YMCA)?" "This is a mean place." "I got a married sister I stay with." "I'd ask ya along, only she's got 6 kids and no room at all." "I'm Bill Mason." " John Horton." "Now, look, Mr. Mason, all I want to do is a rent a room." "Oh, you ever been in this state before?" " No, I haven't." " Oh, that's bad again." "You see, you..." "You got to watch yourself pretty close until you catch on." "They claim this is the most lied about state in the union and that's a fact, only it's them right here that does all the lying." "Well, I'm from Texas." "Oh, now that's a million to one, Texas and this place." "I better take care of ya." "See, there's been some trouble here." "Now, let me see, where can I put ya?" "Well, I know, let's go to Doc Collins'." "He'll find you a place." "Well, I don't want to cause you any trouble." "Oh, this is one place you don' want to be found walking alone." "Any people in this town, white and colored, knock you in the head if they think you got any money on ya." " Don't do that." " What?" "In this town you can't even look at a picture of a white woman." "Somebody will sure say "Hey, boy, who do you think you are, looking at a white gal like that?"" "Then wham, you in a mess of trouble." "I surely appreciate you putting me right." "Well, any time I get over to your county, you do the same for me." "I sure will." " Have you eaten?" " No." "We can get a bite at Doc Collins'." "Oh, fine." "Well, now you seen them." "That's still going strong, eh?" "Yeah, nearly caught us out there." "Evening, all." "Evening, Mrs. Hodges." "This is Mr. Horton from Texas." "How do you do?" "Nice to know you." "Doc Collins thought maybe you could put him up for the night being that he's a stranger in town." "Fine, welcome." "Been trouble ever since we started signing up to vote." "The other night they caught a young boy out there alone, beat him up and he was gone before he knew what happened." "Uh, I guess I can put you up." "It'll cost you $2.75 a night, all right?" "That's all right." "Thank you." "Well, take care, Mr. Horton." "Yes." "See you around." "Thank you, Mr. Mason." " Thanks for your trouble." " Sure thing." "I'll see you to your room." " Good night, ladies." " Good night." "I'll get you some water." "Thank you." "You're perfectly safe here." "We got us a rifle club." "Practice every Sunday." "They know about it, too." "I say, let them play around all they want, just stay away from me." "I guess I'm just not used to this kind of thing." "You'll get a good sound sleep here." "They know better to mess around with this black man." "Good night." "Good night." "Well?" "It's a crazy idea." "It's a hell of a crazy idea." "I thought you'd see it my way." "But it's out of the question." "I want to do a series of articles, diary fashion." "They way I did on the school immigration in Shelby." "I've got to do it, Eli." "I was perfect for black and tan." "Will you carry?" " Nope." " But it's timely." "This whole situation's exploding right in our faces." "You go through with this damn fool thing and your little old hometown of Shelby, Texas is gonna explode right in your face." "Fairfax, bring us a couple of bourbons." "Johnny, just because you got away with it once." "This is different." "This is different." "That was an assignment." "I was neutral, I was a reporter." "But this has got me hooked personally." "I got to live it from the inside." "You lost a lot of friends then." "This time they're going to go after your wife, your mother, your kids." "Your neighbors won't know ya." "Your name will be mud." "You can't get away with it twice, Johnny." "I don't expect to get away with it." "Weren't you the man, the first man in this state, to run a magazine with a negro staff?" "I'm an eccentric millionaire." "A character." "It's a scoop, but it's much too dangerous." "You gotta forget it." "You'd be in the worse kind of neighborhoods, fist fights and knifings." "I ain't even worried about that." "Oh, thank you, friend." "It's those rednecks that bother me and I know that ignorant bunch." "They catch you just once in that disguise and..." "Well, it looks as though I'm gonna have to get somebody else to run these articles." "You ain't gonna forget this, are ya?" "I figured you wouldn't." "You know you're a damn fool." "I know." "It'll make a great story." "When do you start?" "You'll get the first installment in a couple of months." "I plan to start right away." "Johnny, will you do me one favor?" "Yeah." "Don't get yourself killed." "I'll do my best." "Why can't you stay home and write?" "I feel as though my whole life has led up to this, growing up here in Texas." "You know what that means, Lucy." "Things you never mention, but always there." "The deep undercurrent always there." "And then France and studying there and a whole new world opening up." "And then the war, seeing the Nazis in action." "Seeing the ultimate consequences of hatred." "Then being blinded, changing worlds again." "Lucy, I've got to do this." "Please try and understand." "It frightens me." "These things that other people do, at least they have each other." "My way is not the way of others." "How will I know you're safe?" "I'll write to you and I'll phone." "There's nothing to worry about." "I guess I can handle it." "This coffee stinks!" "Damn punk niggers!" "Look at you all!" "You don't know how to act!" "You don't know how to dress!" "You don't deserve any better!" ""Mein kampf."" "Do you speak German?" " No." " No!" "You're ignorant!" "You make me sick." "You!" "You know where Juarez is?" "Not really." "Juarez, is it old Mexico or New Mexico?" "Hmm?" "Old Mexico." "I've been there many times." "Don't lie to Christophe." "Christophe's got brains." "You never been to Juarez." "Sit down, man!" "Sit down!" "I'm glad you hit him." "I'd have to take his part." "Are you threatening me?" "Why don't you two just agree not to talk, huh?" "He don't say another word to me, you promise?" "He won't." "Will you?" "I guess not." "Don't speak!" "Don't speak!" " All right." "Ok." "You don't dig the blues do you, daddy?" "I'm not sure." "I bet you'll dig this, daddy." "That got you, didn't it, Father?" "I'm not a priest." "Were you an altar boy?" "I wanted to be a priest." "Don't believe anything he says." "I told you not to talk to me." "Shut up!" "I came to sit by you because you look like the only one here with sense enough to carry on an intelligent conversation." "Thank you." "I'm not pure negro." "My mother was French." "Part French." "My father... part Indian." "She was Portuguese, my mother, a lovely woman." "Gee, I wonder what kind of blood you got." "Give me a minute." "Christophe never makes a mistake." "I can always tell what kind of blood a man's got in him." "No please." "I have it now." "Please." "Florida, Navajo." "Your mother was Florida, Navajo, wasn't she." "Well, you're pretty sharp." "Christophe never misses." "I hate us, Father." "Look at those punks." "Those ignorant bastards." "I'm not a priest." "Ah, you can't fool Christophe." "I tell you the truth." "I am just out of the "pen" for 4 years." "I found my wife with another guy." "Have you told your priest about it?" "I haven't been inside a church for 17 years." "That is the only peace." "It's never too late to go back." "Now, I got to shoot up a couple of guys." "Don't worry, daddy..." "Just watch out." "Come with me, we shoot up these bastards and have ourselves a time, eh?" "No?" "Good-bye, Father." "Good-bye." "Mr. Hodges." "Mr. Horton." "Afternoon." "Well, hard work." "It's about the Romans." "I like it." "I'll let you keep at it." "It makes me kind of homesick." "Do you play?" "Oh, a little bit, sure." "Play something, please." "Nobody every plays." "Yeah, do." "How long will it take, doctor?" "Now, you can't rush this." "There's danger of damage to the liver." "We'll keep a close check for several weeks to see if your system can take it." "Put your clothes on." "I'm anxious to get started." "Look here, this is a fairly unprecedented procedure," "I'm sure you realize." "The only experience we have to go on are cases of Vitiligo." "And then it's just 2 or 3 white spots we're trying to dot." "This is more complex." "I'll give you these shots once a week." "You can supplement them with sun lamp treatments at home." "I'm a long ways away from home." "Yeah, I know." "Incidentally, I need your local address." "It's 25 magnolia drive." "I'm using a friend's apartment while he's out of town." "He has no idea what I'm trying to do." "Doctor, where can I get a sun lamp?" "They sell them at the drugstore." "Now, you use it morning and night." "10 minutes to start with." "We'll increase the doses later on." "You take these pills twice a day." "In a few weeks you'll be black enough your mother wouldn't know you." "How long will the color last, doctor?" "A few months." "Remember, you leave off the pills, your skin will gradually get lighter." "You got blue eyes." "I can't help you with that." "Well, I'll just have to take my chances on that." "Personally, I don't think you gonna stick it." "Is that a scientific prognosis, doctor?" "My considered medical opinion, you're gonna end up with a knife in your back." "Well, thank you, doctor." "I suppose you know why you're doing this." "Well, there are many reasons." "One of them is that I was blinded in Korea." "It took me 6 years to regain my sight." "I don't know quite how that has anything to do with it, but it certainly does." "See, doctor, when you're blind, there are no color differences." "You learn to see differently and judge differently." "What good's it gonna do whatever you find out?" "Well, when I write it, it may make some people think." "It might, you know, just because it is such a crazy idea." "I don't disagree with that." "Take care of yourself." "How do you do, Mrs. Ingram?" "You seem to know everybody around here." "I never forgets a face, nor a pair of shoes." "Well, I suppose it's good for business." "I'm a stranger here myself." "I don't know a soul." "Well, there's lots to tour." "Well, I'm not exactly a tourist." "I'm a writer." "I'm doing a series of articles on the South for a magazine." "Well, ain't that grand." "I guess I'm trying to find out about living conditions, race relations, changes." "How are things here for the negro?" "Uh, this is a good town." "We ain't had no trouble here, no, sir." "Everybody tends their own business." "That's the way to get along, tend your own business." "Of course." "No, sir, I can't complain." "I makes a living just tend my own little business right here, that's all." "Thank you." "It's a nice job." "Keep the change." "Incedently, my name's Horton." "I suppose you will remember me when I come back." "Just try me out, Mr. Horton." "You'd be amazed." "Hey, how you doing?" " All right." " What is your name?" " Burt." " Tell me your last name." "Wilson." "Well, thank you, Mr. Wilson." "I'll see you again." "I'd be glad to see you, Mr. Horton." "Do come back." "If there's anything you want to know about this town, you just ask me." "Well, thank you, I will." "I will." "How are ya, Burt?" "Oh, mighty fine, thank you." "How are you?" "New in town?" "Maybe so." "What do you mean maybe so?" "Yes or no?" "I've been here a few weeks." "Well, why didn't ya say so then?" "This town ain't half bad." "Least ways, they let you live." "What kind of business you in, man?" "I'm a writer." "You don't say." "Anything familiar about those shoes?" "Well, yeah." "I done shine some just like this for a white man." "A fellow by the name of Horton?" "That's right." "You know him?" "I'm him." "Ah, nah." "You're kidding me." "Go on!" "I thought you were the man who never forgot a pair of shoes or a face." "Heh heh heh." "Well, I'll be darned." "I'm truly a son of a bitch." "Now, wait a minute, you can't fool me." "You're a colored man and you been passing." "No." "Well, ain't that something." "Well, how did you ever..." "That ain't shoe black?" "No." "No, it's done with drugs and dye and sun lamp treatments." "Drugs?" "Pills." "I take them." "I don't know how they work, but they do." "Well, I'll be..." "Well, what's the big idea?" "I want find out what it's like to be a negro in the South." "You're kidding." "No, I'm not." "You gonna be stuck that way, Mr. Horton?" "No, it'll wear off as soon as I stop taking the pills." "The name is John." "John, huh?" "I guess you're really serious." "You're the one person who can help me." " Me?" " Yes, you." "How come?" "What can I do?" "Break me in." "Now, after that, I don't want anybody to know, but you can teach me how to... how to act right." "If I could just hang around here." "I could learn to shine shoes, maybe." "You, Mr. Horton?" "John, excuse me." "I wouldn't expect any money for it." "You wouldn't get rich around here, but you could keep your tips if you made any." "You sure you want to do this?" "It ain't simple, you know." "I know that." "Well, why not?" "Let's go." "First, you gotta look different." "Take off your coat." "Now take your tie off." "Roll up your sleeves." "You're still too well dressed." "You got to learn how to act." "You talk too educated in one way and in another way you got to get smarter." "Ah, you're gonna be a problem." "You think it's easy being colored?" "For instance, man comes up and say "I'm here writing an article on race relations"." "What you say?" "Well, I say, if there's anything I can tell you, sir," "I'd be only too glad to help." "You're through right now." "Ha ha." "I must have sounded kind of stupid." "Yeah, kind of." "Can I help you, sir?" "Yes, I'd like some shoe laces." "Black or brown?" "Oh, make them black." "How's business?" "Can't complain, sir." "You been in this neighborhood long?" "Quite a few years." "Say, how'd you like to make an easy buck, boy?" "Do you know where I can get a gal around here?" "Now, I'm not particular, she don't have to be an eye gal, just as long as she's clean." "The best girly shows is over on king street." "You'll find just what you're looking for there." "That'd be 10 cents, sir." "They can get real democratic when they wants to sin." "There's lots of angles to this business." "It ain't simple." "You got a lot to learn." "This man comes in saying "Hurry up, boy, I ain't got no time."" "What you say?" "Then this other man comes up and say" ""Damn niggers, you can't trust none of them"." "What you do?" "There's plenty of angles." "Man, you got so much to learn." "You got to act different." "You got to talk different." "You even got to think different." "I can see that." "Anything else you wants to know, you just ask me." "What about churches?" "What denomination?" "Catholic." "There's a catholic church 2 blocks over on Mercer." "Where's the nearest men's room?" "Well, now, man, what you want to do, pray or spray?" "Well, I guess it doesn't hurt for a man to do both once in a while." "You are so right." "Lordy, you're so right." "You stick around this town long enough and you'll end up doing most of your praying for a place to go." "You can go at the station and places like that, you just have to locate them." "But I trained myself to wait till I gets home." "Don't drink no water." "Ok, John, I guess I better learn you how to shine some shoes." "How about you take them brushes there and you brush the dirt off first." "You're a musician." "Oh, no, not really." "Yeah, no, man, you're good." "Well, thank you all for letting me play." "Well..." "How's it going?" "Well, you know this town, Mr. Hodges." "I'll be pushing on in a few days." "Well, we're sorry to see you leave so soon." "Well, I never planned to stay." "Yeah." "I've got a long ways to go." "All that stuff you hear about traveling salesman, don't you believe it." "I'm away from home 8 months out of the year." "Sure, you got your variety, but after a while I get tired of restaurant food and motels." "Anyway, I like the city life." "Mobile, St. Louis, that's where the big time is." "You ever live in the city?" "Sure." "Oh, yeah?" "What'd you do?" "Get a job in a motel?" "Done all kinds of work." "Were you in the service?" "Yeah." "I was in the last war myself, France, Tank Corps." "Mmm, those French girls, I'm telling you." "Lot's of them over there shacking up with colored soldiers, too." "You'd be surprised." "What were you, truck driver?" "Infantry." "Infantry!" " Yeah." " Tough." "Tell me, did you ever get a white woman?" "I hear they're nuts about colored fellows over in Australia." "Well, I've never been to Australia." "Did you ever get a white woman?" "Do you think I'm crazy?" "I didn't ask if you was crazy, I asked if you ever had one." "Have you really wanted one?" "There's lots of white woman around here that would like a good black nigger." "Well, I don't see why." "Personally, I prefer my own kind." "Well, that's what you're telling me, but I'll bet inside you think different." "Nice farm country around here, isn't it?" "Now, you can tell me." "Hell, I don't care." "I already told ya!" "You're lying in your teeth." "This is as far as I go." "Better luck next time." "Yes, company." "Come in." "Join the party." "Hey, Pop." "Not so loud!" "Good evening." "Don't you try it." "Hotel won't even give me water." "How about a drink?" "No, thank you, I'm not a drinking man." "Oh, one of them upty doctors." "Are you waiting to take a bath?" "Well, I want to wash my hands." "Well, just step on in." "Reach in." " Well, thank you kindly." " Ok." "All right, Pop, ready for you." "Man, are you crazy?" "I'm not gonna let you give me my death of dampness." "Will you turn that off please?" "Sure." "Oh, Pop, go get some clothes on or you're gonna end up in an ambulance, for sure." "A man your age sittin' around here getting stupid in his birthday suit." "Come on, Pop, let's go." "Come on." "That's it." "I'm going." "Give a colored man his liquor and that's all he wants." "You stayin' in this dump a while?" "A while." "Yeah." "Me?" "I'm from Chicago." "I get down here once or twice a year." "Selling burial insurance." "Mahallen and associates." "The best sickness and burial insurance you can buy." "You wouldn't be in the market by any chance?" "No." "Well, anytime you are." "I'm area manager for 6 Southern states." "Got 23 salesmen to take care of." "That's some job." "Traveling around in these dumpy towns." "Hmm, give me Chicago any old time." "Oh, this isn't half bad, the dives they call hotels in some of these other towns, hmm." "Come on, Pop." "Pop." "Come on." "Up." "Here we go." "Give me your hand." "Ohh." "Come on now." "Ain't you ashamed, Pop?" "Making this fancy hotel look like a low-down, stubum dive." "Come on." "It's all right." "I'll get him upstairs." "You sure?" "Yeah, I'll take care of him." "Good night." "And don't forget..." "Any time you feel the need, Mahallen." "Mahallen and Associates, ok?" "All right." "Ok, Pop, come on." "That's it." "Come on, Pop." "Excuse me, could you tell me where I could find the manager?" "Yes, right over there." "Thank you." "Excuse me, sir." "I'd like to apply for the position of clerk." "I don't have a thing for you." "But your sign says clerk wanted." "I'm sorry, I don't make the policy." "I'm experienced." "We conform to local custom." "I'm sure your negro patrons would approve." "I might have an opening in the stock room later in the month." "It could be good for business." "You seem like an educated man." "I'm sorry, but I am just the manager." "I understand." "Thank you." "You better find yourself another place to sit." "Well, I sure appreciate your stopping." "Any luck getting rides through here?" "No, not much." "Say, that's a pretty bird." "Yes, a surprise for my wife." "The man at the five and dime says he's a guaranteed warbler or your money back." "Ha ha ha." "You from around these parts?" "No." "Texas." "Then you ought to know enough to say "sir"." "Yes, sir." "We got 2 parakeets and a minor bird at home." "Regular bird house." "Yeah, I got me quite a family, all these birds, 3 dogs." "Don't know how many cats." "Our kids are all grown up." "I got 5 grandchildren." "You married?" "Yes, sir." "Any kids?" "Yes, sir." "Boy, 5." "You got a pretty wife?" "Yes, sir, I think so." "She ever had it from a white man?" "Nigger women know they can't get jobs unless they put out to their bosses." "I've hired lots of them to pick crops and work in the house." "I guarantee you I've had every one of them before they ever got their pay." "Then you must have lots of colored children." "Ha ha." "God, no." "Do you ever consider the woman?" "The nigger woman?" "I don't think about them." "Down here they don't go to the cops or say anything about it because they know better." "You think that's pretty bad." "Do you?" "Yes, I do." "Well, we all do it around here." "We figure we doing your race a favor putting a little white blood in it." "Where did you say you was from?" "Texas." "Come down here to stir up trouble, did ya?" "No, no, no, sir." "You know what we do to troublemakers here." "No." "Kill a nigger and toss him in one of these swamps and nobody ever knows anything about it." "This is where you get off." "I'll tell you how it is down here, we'll do business with you and your women." "Other than that, as far as we're concerned, you're completely off the record." "Boy, you just close that door very gently now." "Do like I say, boy." "The hell with you, you black bastard." "You got a pretty wife?" "You got a pretty wife?" "She ever had it from a white man?" "She ever had it from a white man?" "You ever get a white woman?" "Did you ever get a white woman?" "Did you ever get a white woman?" "She ever had it from a white man?" "From a white man?" "Lucy, if I was to come home suddenly, how would you feel?" "Delighted to see you." "No, no, no, I mean, while I'm changed?" "You always did look good with a tan." "I'd be a negro." "I don't understand." "If I were to stay with you, would it be like sleeping with a negro?" "John!" "That excites the hell out of me." "Now, stop it, John." "You better not go." "No, we've got to talk this thing through." "All of it." "Aren't you worried about our marriage?" "When I come back, will it ever be the same again?" "I don't know..." "But I think we can solve it whatever it is." "I'm gonna be out there somewhere changed." "For you back here everything will be the same." "Will you think of me as the man you've lived with all these years or will you think of me as some strange colored man in a furnished room?" "You make everything so complicated." "No." "You take away a man's identity, his face, his color, what's left?" "Lucy, I've got to know what you think because if you do think of me as some strange black man..." "How will I know who I am?" "You'll be you and that's how I'll think of you." "I'm just going a little piece." "You're welcome to ride that far if you want to." "Thank you." "Boy, I'm late." "I couldn't get this rattle trap to go." "Didn't even have time to eat breakfast." "Help yourself to a donut, my wife made 'em." "They're really good." "Don't worry about that." "That's for possums." "There's a lot of them along this road, you get one sometime if you get out early enough." "Go ahead, help yourself." "They really good." "Thank you." "You married?" "Yes." "To a good woman." "And I got a child, and he's mine!" "Ha." "What are you fighting me for, I'm married, too." "I think it's great." "I got 3 kids." "I guess that's the only thing that keeps me going." "How old's yours?" "5." "Got any pictures?" "No." "What kind of father are you?" "I got 3 boys." "One's 3, one's 6, one's 7." "Here." "That one in the middle there, that's butch." "Smart as a whip." "He knows his ABC's and his figures already." "Hmm." "I guess he takes after his mama." "I aim to see he gets through high school." "Boy, I sure feel sorry for people that ain't got a family." "Well, I work right over yonder, so I'm gonna let you off here because I think you'll get a better ride." "You know, Saint Augustine said love and then do what you will." "You're a joy to the heart, mister." "So long." "John, come in here a minute." "Them bastards won't let you live." "I just went over the money, I'm $10 short." "You know what happened to it, don't ya?" "Mr. Pierce, you know we're not allowed to go near the cash register." "Well, $10 just don't walk away." "You were working around here." "Are you accusing me?" "I just asked, did you see the money?" "I've held responsible jobs before this one." "I knew I never should have bothered with one of you educated Negroes." "I just asked, did you see the money?" "No, sir." "Well, that's all." "You know best, did ya take it or not." "I got to keep my eye on everything around here." "Evening, John." "Oh, hi, Stretch." "Ain't you ashamed to spend a Saturday night all alone in your room?" "Well, some of us aren't as lucky as you are." "Vertell Sterling, John Horton." "Hi." "How do you do?" "It's gonna be a big night." "We're having us a ball, Vertell and me." "Why don't you come on along, Mr. Horton?" "We going to the Club Ruby." "I got a girlfriend I can bring along." "As a matter of fact, I'd like that very much." "Can I meet you there?" "In about an hour?" "Fine." "So, then she comes in with this fancy white dress on a hanger and she tells me to iron it." "You know, just when I'm fixing to get out." "It never fails." "So, then I know it's going to take me 20 minutes at least and here I gotta meet Vertell." "So, I says to her real innocent like," "I says, ain't you going to Mrs. Hutchinson's party?" "Because if you is, well, uh, my friend Vertell says that her Mrs. Hutchinson has got a fancy white dress that seems almost like the same kind." "So, then she says, well, maybe I ought to wear my print dress then, Georgie." "Man, I beat it out of there in no time at all." "Oh, I tell you." "They sure like to pile it on come quitting time." "Same way at our place." "You two been friends long?" "Vertell and me?" "Years and years." "Of course, she don't say much, but she's..." "Just like you." "I see you got my number already." "I just like it light, that's all." "You know, I always got the radio on in my room, too." "Don't you like to dance?" "Oh, sure." "Do you like to dance?" "I ain't seen you around." "I haven't been around." "Why not?" "Married." "Oh." "Well, I got a husband around somewhere, too." "Louse." "I ain't seen him in 2 or 3 years." "Let me show you the way they're doing it now." "Aw." "Ha ha ha." "Ha ha." "Hi, honey." "Well." "This is Tippy." "Ha ha." "Honey." "Ha ha ha." "Hi, Tippy." "How are you?" "Say 'hi'." " Can I hold him?" " Sure." "Hi, Tip." "You like dogs?" "Yes." "Boy, I'm a regular fool about him." "You know, I raised him from a pup." "Oh, did you?" "He likes you." "A dog can tell." "You know he could tell about that husband of mine." "You think that's crazy?" "Well, he never would take nothin' from bud and I don't care how hard he tried." "You wanna come in?" "You're really tied up, aren't you?" "Yes." "Don't be so serious." "You're too serious about everything." "Ha ha ha." "I can't help it." "It's the book learning." "Ha ha." "Mm-hmm." "It ruins a fellow for having fun." "I really had fun tonight." "Well, I guess I'll see you around, huh?" "Yes." "Boy, you sure give the girls a hard time." "Good night." "Good night." "That'll be a dollar." "You coming along?" "Oh, hi, Stretch." "I'm picking up the girls." "It's Georgie's night off." "Let's go down to Ruby's." "Oh, count me out." "I've done too much partying lately." "Stay cool." "So long." "Hey, nigger!" "You stop right there!" "There ain't no nice people on this street you can hide behind there." "Hey, why do you keep walking when I told you to stop, nigger?" "Hello there, fuzz head." "Hey, nigger." "Hey, burr head!" "The way I see you..." "We're gonna get you." "Excuse me, sir, I'm in trouble." "There's 2 men chasing me." "I don't know what they want, but they're chasing me." "Who is chasing you?" "2 men, just around the corner there." "I don't see nobody." "Sir, could you tell me where I could find the police?" "I don't see anyone chasing you." "Well, they're there." "Believe me." "Sir?" "Ain't no way you can get away from us, fuzz head." "You may as well stop right there." "Hey, nigger!" "You stop right there!" "There ain't no nice people on this street you can hide behind there." "Hey, why do you keep walking when I told you to stop, nigger?" "All right, boys, this is just what I've been waiting for!" "Now, you come on in here!" "Come on in, I'm waiting for ya!" "Ah..." "I don't dig you, daddy." "Well, you just come in here and you will!" "Come on!" "I'm waitin'!" "Dear Saint Jude..." "Keep them away from me." "Nigger!" "Well, John." "Oh, it's been a long time." "Come on in." "I'd be knowing you anywhere." "Any trouble?" "No, I picked him up right in front of the drugstore." "A couple of dirty looks is all." "All you need now are colored visitors." "You're quite a sight, all right." "I know the trouble you've been having and you shouldn't have let me come here." "Now, you make yourself at home." "Come on, sit down, John." "You'll never know how wonderful it is to be here." "This experience has been so..." "Why don't you tell us later?" "I'm going to fix you some cold chicken." "Sit down, John." "Come on." "Well, Ed, how's it with you?" "Oh, don't worry about me." "I'm bent, but not broken." "Newspaper?" "Well, I wrote what I thought were my editorials, now I got 3 subscribers left in the state." "You got one in Shelby, Texas, you know." "I got enough readers out of the state to pay the printers." "You know, it's getting kind of hard to maintain the illusion that the South is waiting for my liberal message." "Bourbon?" "No, nothing." "It takes courage, Ed, and I've just about run out of mine." "You got guts." "Me?" "No, I'm one of the last genuine cowards left in this world." "I stopped by a red light in traffic in town the other day, this character pulls up along side me and yells, aren't you Ed Saunders?" "If you get out of that damn car, I'll mop up the street with ya." "Well, lucky for me the traffic light changed just then, so I says, well, you don't offer a man much inducement, do ya?" "Ha ha." "You should have seen the look on his face when I drove off." "One of my former readers no doubt." "Come on and eat, John." "I bet you had no dinner." "Thank you, Mary." "I had no intention of calling you, but I couldn't stand it another minute." "You know I wanted this thing to go on for several months." "You don't have to explain a thing, just relax." "Oh, I quit." "Now, that's what's been happening to me." "Several months and here in the sixth week" "I sit and I'm asking you to take me back." "I want to escape." "I'm saying take me back to the white world." "You look beat, John." "Will you take me in?" "Mary, set out the guest towels, the black ones." "John's gonna stay the night and longer, if necessary." "And I thought I'd seen every form of human degradation before." "Now, both of you stop talking." "Come and enjoy your food." "Come on, John, sit down." "I'm sorry." "It's just too much." "Get a good night's sleep and everything will look different tomorrow." "Ed, do you know that when you're a black man, it doesn't matter who you are or what you are, the color of your skin is all that matters." "I don't know how they stood it all their lives." "Well, that's simple, they have no choice." "I want you to tell me something very honestly, your newspaper and what you and Mary have sacrificed..." "Is it worth it?" "Worth it?" "Well, let me list the advantages." "You will no longer be bothered by invitations." "And parties and telephone calls from friends and other distractions." "Your own relatives won't know you." "Your lawn will be regularly improved by, oh... handsome decorations, bed sheet parades, and other attractions." "Your wife and kid will have to get used to anonymous phone calls, bomb scares, hate letters." "You might get interviewed on TV." "Or win a brotherhood award and win a free trip to New York." "Let me ask you something..." "If you did nothing." "If you glad-handed everybody and tried like hell not to offend one single prejudiced, bigoted idiot in town, the way I did for years, let me ask you..." "Could you sleep at night?" "Well..." "I sleep like a rock, friend... and my conscious is healthy." "Don't worry, John." "You got what it takes." "I'll see you down at the bowling alley." "See ya." "Mr. Wilson?" " Yes?" " My name is Horton." "Your secretary said I could find you here." "I'm answering your ad for office help." "I think I have the qualifications you want." "I can type, do all kinds of office work." "Can you write a letter with no mistakes?" "Yes, sir, I'm a college graduate." "I worked for a magazine in Texas." "I can get references if you like." "Never mind." "Can you make up a payroll?" "Yes, sir, I can." "Well, you can't get any job like that here." "But your ad..." "I know you'd be satisfied with my work." "I'll work for less." "That wouldn't make any difference." "Well, I promise you I'll do a good job." "We don't want you people." "But you do have colored here." "I'll let you in on something." "We're gradually weeding you people out." "We're taking it slow, but we're doing it." "Whose gonna do your dirty work for you?" "They'll always be a few jbso a white man wouldn't want." "That was what you were looking for, wasn't it?" "No, sir." "How are we supposed to live?" "That's the whole point." "I hear there's plenty of jobs for you with the bleeding hearts up North." "Don't come around here asking for white men's jobs." "Like I told her, now, if all the colored for one day stopped everything, what would happen?" "You should have seen her face." "Why, Willa, that's impossible, it could never be." "I said, don't be too sure, Mrs. Peterson, it just might happen." "And you know what, this nation would go down." "Nothing could go on, that's sure." "You know who's the backbone of this nation?" "You know it's the colored people." "Before there was the white man, there was colored." "Oh, it's right in the Bible." "All you got to do is read it." "You didn't bear me, I bore you." "Did you really tell her that, Mrs. Townsend?" "I sure did." "I told her we was here first." "And you know, there never was a colored child that was puny and sickly." "Never one." "Ah, we better off than they is because all our children are strong and healthy." "And why?" "There's only one answer and you know it." "The good Lord protected my children." "Have some more pie." "No, thank you, but it was delicious." "Oh, good clean home cooking." "Ha ha." "Better you get in all those fancy eating places, huh?" "You ever notice in the white man's eatin' places who's in the kitchen?" "You want good food, the man know how to get it." "Oh, I've been in a white kitchen all my life." "Still dealing with them now." "And you know, I feel kind of sorry for them seeing how good the good Lord is to his colored children." "Well, I don't feel sorry for them at all." "Not at all." "I think they're cruel and vicious." "And they seem to have a million ways of making you feel like nothing." "Child, ain't you used to it yet in all your years of living?" "Just a cup of coffee please." "Ok." "Thank you." "You seem like a smart man." "Did you ever think that if all us colored just one day stop, stop everything, what would happen?" "This nation would go down." "Wouldn't go on, for sure." "Operator, I'd like to call long distance please." "Yes, Shelby, Texas." "Listen..." "Collect call..." "You read in the newspapers how the Army's taking all the boys from the South?" "And most of the white boys can't read or write and the colored mostly know how." "And why?" "Because the white man's so busy keeping his children bossy mind, they ain't got time for studying." "And when they does get around to studying, they don't know how." "Just sitting there bossing much." "Hello?" "John." "John." "Operator, I want to cancel that call to Texas." "I'm sorry, I've changed my mind." "Ain't none of them women worth moping over." "You trust in the Lord, then you will like a helping hand." "Fascinating theories, too." "I enjoy eating here." "You've eaten here before?" "Oh, yes, yes." "God, this town, it gets me down." "I'm from up North doing research on my PhD." "This idiotic segregation, what a nuisance." "Hey, what do you do here at night after you've seen the one movie in town, huh?" "Not much." "What's your research on?" "The urbanization of rural populations." "It will be a cross-cultural study, comparison of Southern whites," "Southern negroes, and Puerto Ricans." "If that means anything to ya." "I managed to follow you." "Mrs. Townsend!" "Hey, listen, I'd like to talk to you some more." "Why?" "I'm not a rural negro." "In fact, I've got to get going." "Hey, wait a minute." "It isn't every day I get a chance to talk to an intelligent man like you." "I'm Charles Maynard, by the way." "John Horton." "Now, Mrs. Townsend, what do I owe you please?" "That'll be a $1.75." "Here you are." "Thank you very much." "Bye." "Here you are." "Bye." "Listen, I've got an idea." "I'm staying at a motel down the street." "Why don't you just come on over there for a while?" "We can have a drink and talk." "I bet there's a lot I can learn from you." "Well, Mr. Maynard, I don't know about that." "Call me Charlie." "Well, all right, Charlie, all right." "Come on, let's go." "Come back and see us." "How about another, huh?" "No, thank you." "You're an odd one, aren't ya?" "Don't you like your liquor?" "Usually, you people don't have the same inhibitions that we do." "We're all basically pure." "You know, we try and give our children a decent set of values, good education." "Our ministers preach sin and hell the same as yours." "Oh, sure, sure, sure." "Still, I understand you people have more realistic views of sex than we do." "You don't get so damn many conflicts." "That's a fact." "There's no real difference, Mr. Maynard." "No real difference at all." "Thank you for the drinks." "I got to be going." "Now, wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "We're just getting started." "You have to understand, John, I have a scientific interest." "I'm trying to write an honest thesis." "Come on, sit down, please." "Come on." "Tell me, will you, what your research methods are?" "Do you use open-end questions, subjective tests?" "Are you in the field or something?" "I manage to read a book now and then." "And you don't think there's any difference?" "The point is, negroes regard sex as a total experience." "Anything that makes you feel good is morally right for you." "I wish I could live that way." "I cannot agree that there is any difference between our morality and yours." "Well, how can you debate that?" "Now, if you'd read the Berkeley study." "That's one of the books I managed to get through." "Well, then, what about the low value placed on virginity?" "The large number of illegitimate births, the general instability of the negro family." "These are all facts, John." "That may be, but I contend that it's due to environment and not to inherent differences." "If you will just compare the sexual attitudes of low-income whites with those of low-income negroes," "I think you'll find a definite correlation." "Well, that's exactly the kind of comparison I'm interested in." "The trouble is I usually can't find any of you people to talk to." "Half the time all they do "Yes, sir" you to death and the rest of the time they can't even get out a straight sentence." "That's because you question low-income groups and ignorant slobs like me." "Oh!" "Ha ha!" "You just got to stick around and answer my questions." "Professor, you are a fine..." "Hey, hey, have a drink." "No, thank you, I've had enough." "All right." "Now, the Berkeley study definitely proves that the negro has more frequent sex contacts, more frequent orgasms." "I've read it, I told you." "Well, then." "You can very easily argue about the sampling techniques." "You can question the veracity of the informers." "All right, forget about the Berkeley study." "Just tell me how you like to do it, John." "How often, with the same dame or what, huh?" "You've had too much to drink." "Oh, come on." "This is man to man." "It's just between us, John." "I have a scientific interest." "For instance, it's a scientific fact that the negroes' organs are larger, huh?" "That's absolute nonsense." "Prove it to me, John." "Hey, we're about the same age." "Come on." "Oh, you filthy drunk." "You think you can say anything to a man just because his skin is black." "You're so scientific!" "Wait a minute!" "Don't!" "You're just scum!" "Oh!" "Let me go!" "Please!" "I'm no queer." "Honest, I'm no queer." "Oh, Father, may I talk to you some more please?" "Come with me." "Have a seat." "Father..." "What I have to say to you may sound very strange." "As I confessed to you just now, I did try to kill a man." "In provocation, influence of drink, but there's more to it, much more." "Do you wish to confess again, my son?" "What I have to say I don't think properly belongs in confession." "You see, I'm a white man." "I changed the color of my skin and for 3 months now I've been traveling through the South." "I'm a writer." "Well, if you don't believe me," "I can show you my driver's license." "You would not lie to me." "No." "It's just that it's such an extraordinary situation and I'm never sure how people are going to react." "Ever since I started, something has happened to me that I hadn't foreseen..." "And it horrifies me." "It's as though I was no longer myself." "I look like a stranger, I live like a stranger." "Now, I'm beginning to feel like a stranger." "It's as though I've lost my immortal soul." "You cannot lose your immortal soul." "The soul is of God and returns to God." "You are in a state of grace having made your confession." "You must pray for peace of mind." "What you have lost is your pride of self." "Everything I've done, I've done for the sake of brotherhood." "How could self enter into it?" "On this journey, your goal was..." "To see how it felt to be a negro in the South." "Father... "To prepare a new age of the world." "Martyrs to the love of neighbor may first be necessary."" "Those words were like a command to me when I started out." "But now... now I find myself acting like an inferior colored man filled with anger and hatred." "An inferior colored man?" "Yeah." "That, too, has happened." "I'm filled with prejudice, Father." "It's like a poison." "I thought I'd purged myself, but I had not." "Son, are you so certain this singular act is required of you?" "All of us at one time or another have had to wrestle with this question, especially here in the South." "I have worked with both races in this community for some 30 years." "It's tough work." "I sometimes wonder if it adds up to anything at all." "You're right, Father." "It was prior to self..." "And the desire for the singular act." "For the best of motives, however..." "One must have large doses of faith and patience to do the small, ordinary jobs that must be done." "When you go home, my son, you will be stronger because of the ordeal you have passed through." "I will remember you in my prayers." "Thank you, Father." "God bless you, my son." "You're stepping on my porch." "Oh, I'm sorry I thought that was your garden and I could stand in your garden." "The garden's back here." "Can't you see?" "Oh." "I can see now." "Say, would you like to decorate your castle with these?" "Ok." "You help me." "I sure will." "Loretta!" "Loretta, come here!" "Loretta, come here immediately!" "I'm talking to my friend." "You better go, Loretta." "Oh, all right." "Are you all right, honey?" "Are you sure you're all right?" "Excuse me." "When is the next bus for Medford, please?" "One leaves in 10 minutes." "Another at 9:30." "I'd like a one-way ticket, if you will." "It'll be a $1.60." "Fine." "I can't change that." "Well, I'm sorry, that's all I have." "I'd like a ticket to Medford, please." "I can't change that bigger bill." "I told you so." "Now, there must be someone in this great big bus system who can change a $10 bill." "Perhaps the manager." "Lady, do you know what you've got?" "We call it the hate stare." "And I must say you've got the best one I ever did see." "I feel sorry for you." "Mind if I sit down?" "Oh, sure, go ahead." "Thank you." "This is a nice place." "Nobody bother you." "Interstate commerce." "Oh, the name's Newcomb." "Frank Newcomb." "My boy Thomas is studying to be a teacher over at the school." "I don't know if he gonna make it though 'cause he's been in jail twice for his integrating work." "The sheriff put the dogs on him right here in town." "That's terrible." "John Horton." "It's a pleasure to know you, Mr. Newcomb." "You must be proud of your boy." "Oh, I sure am." "You gonna be in town long, Mr. Horton?" "Oh, 3 or 4 days, I guess." "Hey, you wouldn't know of a place that I could stay?" "Well, there's a hotel in town." "Oh." "Terrible place." "It's full of gambling and whoring." "Cost you an arm and a leg, too." "Are you a nice man, Mr. Horton?" "Well, my wife thinks so." "Well... you can stay with me if you like." "That is, if you don't mind sharing a bed." "I wouldn't want to put you out." "Ohh." "I'm just a gabby old man." "I like company." "Come on." "I see you've got a typewriter." "John, you want to write a letter?" "Help yourself." "Well, I'd appreciate using it later." "Not tonight." "See, Mr. Newcomb," "I'm doing a series of articles for a magazine." "Oh." "Are you a reporter?" "Sort of." "I'd like to talk to the people who are in the demonstrations here in town, do a story on them." "I wonder if you'd introduce me to them." "Well, I suppose so." "Oh, come on." "There's plenty of room." "Thank you." "You ever figure how come God tell us that we got to love the white man, no 'if's, 'and's, or 'but's about it?" "Now, suppose when we started integrating in this town, then we decided to fight with the man, and went out to buy a gun..." "Why, no colored man in this section could buy it." "Even a bullet for hunting', much less a gun." "The Lord know what he doin'." "And then he'd tell us, to get integration, we got to love that man." "Besides..." "If we was to hate the white man..." "Then we'd be dragged down to his level..." "And our race..." "would be ruined for sure." "And then the sheriff says to this little colored boy," ""Nigger, don't let the sun shine on you in this town"." "And that little colored boy spits right in his face." "Ha ha!" "And then..." "And then he says, all who's gonna disperse, disperse!" "And then Reverend Ingall..." "Reverend Ingall started..." "Oh, tell him about Mrs. Tomkins, Paul." "Oh, yeah." "Well, she's about 97 years old, and she's spry as a chicken and she..." "And she walked right up to the sheriff and she says, in that little squeaky way of hers: "Sheriff," "I want to disperse in the worse way, but I can't figure out which way you all wants me to disperse with all them polices and them dogs around."" "And the sheriff showed her which way and she thanked him very politely and walked right up to the head of the line." "Right in front of Reverend Ingalls." "Ha!" "And you know, she was the first one they put on the wagon and the first one they let out 'cause they was afraid she was gonna die on 'em in jail." "Oh, Seda Tomkins ain't gonna never die until she sees freedom." "Good morning, Tom." "That's not necessary." "Well, I'm a pro." "I worked in a shoe shine stand a while back." "I thought you were a reporter." "That's right." "When does your trial come up?" "Well, we're out on bail now." "They might not even put us on trial till after the appeals court decision over in Middleton." "I'm not worried." "I don't suppose anybody likes to go to jail." "If it's necessary to go to jail, you go to jail." "You know, I must tell you, that I admire the courage of you people here very much." "Ha." "Yeah." "I hear you've been interviewing everybody." "You making a lot of money on all those stories you've been writing about us brave people?" "I want people to understand what you're doing here and I make a living." "Some people get a thrill out of reading about it when they beat us over the head, set the dogs on us." "Some of those negroes up North are worse than the whites." "They wouldn't give a thin dime to support you, but, boy, they sure like to read about it." "We even got a few of them in school." "Ha." "I tell you, it really wears you down." "Tom, what I write, I write for the South." "Well, how do you like that?" "I knew there was something phony about you." "You got a lot of nerve coming into people's homes pretending you're folks." "Take a look at that, pop." "Let me explain." "Just take a look at that." "Would you let me explain to you please?" "Sneaking in here all painted up!" "Will you let me explain?" "And... and I let you sleep in my own bed." "The other week, when they hauled us all in, there wasn't one white man, woman, or child from this town, opened his mouth in support!" "Put 29 of us in jail for disturbing the peace." "What peace?" "You know what it would have meant for one white man to support us at that time?" "And I don't mean just talk!" "I do now!" "Why don't you read what I've written before you twist it all around?" "Because it won't make any difference, they're just words." "You'll read what I've written, won't you, Mr. Newcomb?" "I know you'll understand." "Please?" "Didn't you tell us you were from Shelby, Texas, or was that a lie, too?" "Isn't that where they had that school integration riots, in Shelby?" "Yes." "Yes, it was." " Where were you then?" " Well, as a matter of fact..." "What were you doing then?" "I had an assignment to do a story on it." "It was just straight stuff and factual, but, believe me, that's all I could do." "One single white man in each County willing to give up his life for justice." "Do you know what a difference that would make?" "The white southerner has to know what it's like to be a negro." "Really know." "And you know what it's like, huh?" "After 10 weeks or 3 months or whatever it is, you know!" "No, I don't know." "And I can never know any more than you can know what it's like to be inside my skin." "Tom, the point is that we got to keep trying." "Mr. Horton... that blackness on your face, it'll come off, won't it?" "You wipe that blackness off..." "They'll treat you like a man." "We black in a white man's country." "There ain't nothin' we can do about it." "If you don't understand that, you don't understand nothing." "I know how tom feels." "I know how come he talk that bitterness." "Tom know though that, that ain't no way to talk." "He been taught different." "Tom, the man trying to help." "We don't need his help." "What we want we'll get by our own strength." "I'm doing this for myself." "I want the South to be a fit place for my children to live." "Can't you understand that?" "They'll be an understanding between us the day we get all our rights." "That day and not a minute sooner." "No, wait." "But until that day comes, we got to keep talking." "At least we both want the same thing." "Tom talk that way on account of what he been through." "Still, it don't seem right..." "Now you staying on with us." "Mr. Horton, I think you best go on back home where you belong." "I've been getting ready to go home for some time, Mr. Newcomb." "Oh, it... it ain't that we don't appreciate what you..." "Mr. Horton, the white folks that read this, the folks back home, they'd believe you, won't they?" "Now that you done found out how it is." "I don't know that." "I don't know that at all." "Well, it's time that they did." "All I know is..." "I'll tell them."