"He told me "whomever amongst us who's killed as a martyr should go to paradise to lead the luxurious life that he's never seen."" ""God is great" he repeats." "No one knows how long the battle will continue, but in a country long ravaged with poverty, anger and violence, one thing is certain, there will always be those willing to pay the ultimate price, to make their voices heard." "Would you like a brochure?" "Hi, sir, would you like a brochure?" "Hi, sir." "Would you like a brochure?" "Would you like a brochure?" "Sir?" "Okay, then." " Hi, ma'am, would you like a brochure?" " No thank you." "So you've outlined the absent father, bipolar mother, self harm issues, and history of previous suicide attempts." "Yep, toxicology off the charts." "Poor thing." "And on the day... you were the person who signed her out as being okay to leave." "Yes, I did." " Which is... which is..." " Yeah, I..." "Travis, is there something that you... want to add to the file?" "About her condition or any of the symptoms that she may have presented?" "Do you know what she asked me one time?" "She asked me... if I thought it was possible to treat someone's soul." "Do you think that... that we can treat someone's soul?" "I know." "I know." "It's just I look at these people across the table and... and I can see that there's something in there that I'm missing." "And I don't know what the fuck it is." " Travis..." " We talked about her life, okay?" "Not her file because for once in my life I wanted to help someone in this fucking place." "Travis, look, it is tough," "I get it." "But this is our job." "We treat sick people." "And I know you must be feeling like there was something you could've done but..." "No, you're wrong." "I don't feel anything." "I can't feel anything." "But thank you." " Good morning, Trevor." " Morning, Doctor Bell." "So, Rachel..." "Hi, there." "I'm Doctor Bell." "How's your week been?" " Good." " Good." "And the medication, you've been on the new medication for..." "About a month now, do we need to make any adjustments?" "No." "I feel better." "Better." "And are you sleeping uninterrupted through the night?" "And on a scale of one to ten, how would you rate Tuesday night's lasagne?" " A seven." " Seven." "Interesting." "I would have gone with eight." "I thought they did something pretty special there." "A few days ago I was down south at a party." "I'd had a few beers, a pill," " bit to smoke, but I was cool." " Okay." "So... so I go to the kitchen, to find some ice, and..." " You took ice as well?" " For my beverage, relax, dude." "Okay." "Sorry." "I turn around, and God and the devil are standing there." "God goes out to the patio and the devil's standing right there behind me." " With big horns." " That's interesting." "Yeah." "And I said to the devil, mate... you have no love in your life, that's the trouble with you." "That's why you do what you do." "Devil couldn't forgive himself." "That's the message, man." "Bring love." "Wait." "What did the devil have to forgive himself for?" " Have to ask him yourself, mate." " No, Dean, seriously." "What do you think that the devil had to forgive himself for?" "Hello?" "Hi." "I just..." "I was in the city and I just..." " Who is this?" " I'm sorry, it's Rachel." "Rachel?" " We met at the hospital, the other day..." " How did you get this number?" "I was just in the city and I..." "I was walking around and..." " Are you okay?" " I just think I need to see someone." "I was walking around and it started to rain." "And... then I couldn't think what it was that I needed." "And then I remembered." "But it's gone again." " Well, how's your week been?" " Special." " Oh, yeah." " Very special." "Do you want to tell me about it?" "I have these... intense feelings." " Do you want to talk to me about them?" " No, I don't want to talk about them." "Sorry?" "I didn't say anything." "You didn't?" "It's not like that, it's... it's..." "It's more..." "It's more..." "Oh, God." "No." " No?" " No." "I sort of was going up and down all the time, fluctuating with moods and... anxiety and depression, so in general..." "Just being overwhelmed like a tidal wave had come over me, with so much new things that took me to a dark place." "I was exhausted, confused and angry, and I had..." "I was exhausted..." "Dude." "I'm sorry." "I lost my train of thought." "Train fucking derailed more like it." "Toot toot, Trav!" "Doctor." "Okay, Dean?" "In this room, I'm doctor." "I've got a question." "Why are you doing this, man?" "Trav?" "Doc?" "Doing what?" "Nah, nah, come on, I'm asking." "Serious." "You're smart." "You scrub up alright." "You could do what you want." "Well, I don't want to do anything else." "Helping make you feel good?" "Satisfied patients." " Let's talk about you, hey, Dean?" " No, no, let's talk about you." "'Cause, I've heard something." "People have been talking, mate." "Last week we were... we were talking about you at the party..." "Not flash, brother." "Doesn't inspire confidence in the clientele, does it?" "Okay, Dean, well, we'll start working when you're ready." "One of your favorites." "That's what I heard." "That's cool." " She was mine too." " Shut the fuck up, hey, Dean?" "Thought it was a bit harsh." "Not exactly, "Thank you, Doctor Travis", was it?" "No, Rachel..." "No, no, no, no, no!" "No!" "Dean is one of those patients" " that can get under your skin." " We both know it's not about him." "Alright, then." "Perhaps we should start by discussing how you're coping..." "Was there something specific... you wanted to talk to me about?" "We think it would be best for everyone if you..." "We?" "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize that there was somebody else here." "Take a couple of weeks and think about..." "A couple of weeks." "You firing me?" " No, I'm not firing anyone!" " Just tell me." "I can take it." "I'm saying, take two or three weeks." "What..." "Oh, Jesus, Trav!" "I tried to protect you." "Right?" "Doctor?" "Hi, there, would you like a brochure?" "Excuse me, would you like something to read?" "Would you like to ask a question with me?" "Ma'am, would you like to ask a question with me?" "How about you, sir?" "Sir?" "What?" "Do you ever find yourself alone, or abandoned or in pain, you could come and speak to us." "There's a meeting tonight if you wanted to come." "I'm busy tonight." "That's a shame." "Hey." "It doesn't have to be now, but pick up once." "Okay, I'm going to keep trying you." "I was discharged today." "I know." "My dad came and collected me from the hospital... took me home." "They redecorated my old bedroom." "Put all my old trophies up on the shelf." "Like a shrine." "Violin." "I played violin." "Played?" "Why'd you stop?" "I wanted to see if I could be someone other than a girl who plays the violin." "Right." " And can you?" " I don't know." "What time is it?" "About three." "I shouldn't be here, should I?" "No." "I think I just needed someone to..." "you know?" "Yeah." "Of course." "It must get lonely having to listen to everyone's crap all the time." "Actually it's a nice break from all the crap inside my own head." "I don't think that..." "that's such a good idea." "Hi, I'm Tom." "What's your name?" " Hey." "I'm Travis." " Good to meet you, Travis." " Just through here?" " Yeah." "Just round to your right." "I've served." "I've done a tour of duty of Iraq." "And I've seen the terror first hand." "I saw it for what it was and I saw what caused it." "In this time of danger..." "All these people burning up with their own personal pain..." "And then they inflicted it upon their world." "But all that time, I couldn't stop thinking that the hatred that kills hearts and kills each other... it all really comes from within." "The biggest lie that they told after 9/11 was that the enemy is out there." "You know, somewhere in a desert, in a cave, waiting to strike." "But the darkest and most frightening enemy... is the enemy who poisons himself from within because he can't see the terror inside his own heart." "Okay, thanks everyone." "Now you've seen that, it's time for the important part of tonight." "Marcus has committed to say something, so let's give him our full support." "You alright?" "Before I came here, I was an addict." "Before I got here... everyone blamed me for being in my pain." "It was when I got off of it, that's when I realized how... how bad..." " Look, you have to do this." " I know..." " Okay?" " I know." "I know!" "I know I've fucked up my chances before, but I won't do it again." "You've shown me so much... about the injuries that have been given to me." "And why I've been in so much pain and how it caused me to be an addict." "And I know that with your help, and with Father's help, and with Grace's help, that I can get there." "Okay." "Tell them." "I want to let go of my life." "I want to join you on the farm." "It's so beautiful there and..." "I promise... that if you let me, I will join your family." "And I will protect you like you've protected me." "And I will light the light of my consciousness." "I will light my light." "This is a photo of me, and my mum and my stepdad Glen." "It's the only thing I have of my old life." "It burns!" " That's all you had to do." " Thank you." "Thank you." "Something wrong, Travis?" "Not with me." "You're the one making the poor kid stand up here and... talk about some pretty difficult stuff in front of a bunch of homeless people." "No offense." " Is that what you see happening?" " Yeah, it is." "'Cause, I see Marcus showing a lot of courage and saying who he really wants to be and now he's got somewhere where he belongs." "You should be ashamed of yourself." "Travis?" "Travis." " What?" " Don't stay away if you're in pain." "Thanks." "Come on." "Do it." "Do it." "Just a little bit." "Just a little bit." "Just a little bit." "Not for them." "Not for me." "Just for you." "Just for you." "Come on, now." "Please, come on, please..." " Okay, okay, okay." " Thank you." "Thank you." " But you have to go inside." " Okay." "Yes." "Inside." "Just... here?" " Shut the door." "Shut the door." " Shut the door?" "Door is shutting." " Thank you." " No worries." "Five..." " Hello?" " Hello, it's me." " It's Travis." " Travis, it's really late." " Travis." " Okay." "Don't stay away if you're in pain... that's what she said." "What's happened, Travis?" " Pills, mostly." " Tell me, how many have you had?" "Probably around forty." "Forty?" "Maybe forty-seven." "Travis, where are you?" " Tell me where you are." " I'm in my apartment." "Where are you?" " What's your address?" " Four seven three..." " Four seven three king." " Can you hear me?" " Just around the corner from the church." " Travis?" "We're coming." "Just stay awake!" "There you go... that's it, just a sip..." "One sip... that's it... that's it." "How do you feel?" "It doesn't matter." "Hello." "Who are you?" "Where am I?" "Please don't." "Where are you going?" "Hello?" "Hello?" " I've got something for you to drink, mate." " I don't want to drink it." " You've got to." "You've gotta drink it." " I don't want to fucking drink it." "You stay the fuck away from me." "I don't want to fucking drink it." "Listen to me you fucking assholes, just stay the fuck away from me, okay?" "Stay the fuck away from me!" "I don't want to drink it!" "Tom, what are you doing?" "What's he doing?" "I don't want to drink it." "Please, just leave me alone, I just want to get out of here." "I just want to get out of here!" "You fucking prick!" "Oh, fuck!" "What are you doing!" "You motherfuckers!" "Why are you doing this?" "What the fuck are you doing!" "I don't want it!" "I don't want..." "I don't want to..." "I don't want to drink it." "I don't want to drink it." "You motherfuckers." "I don't want to drink it." "I don't want to drink it." "I don't want to drink it." "Thank you." "Your body's judging you for your addiction." "When you're a whole person you can have a whole meal." "Can't wait." "That's just how it works." "What are you looking for?" "Painkillers." "Oxycozin." "Cirtrulline." "Diazepam." "Vodka." "Gin." "You don't have a bottle of gin, do you?" "We don't have any of that here." "Of course you don't, because that would be fun." "Why do you do them?" "Do what?" "The pills." "I mean, do they make you feel good?" "No." "They don't make you feel anything." "It's brilliant." "Is that what you were trying to do when we found you?" "Yeah." "My parents were just like you." "But they couldn't get clear." "What happened to them?" "Well, they had to leave." "They left you here?" "Jay loves everyone who'll let him." "Without him I'd be nothing." "Okay." "So what are you going to do now?" " What do you mean?" " Well, do you want to fight it?" "Yeah." "Do you?" "Yes." "I want to fight it." "Because if you don't, you should just leave right now." "I want to fight it." "Okay." "Jesus." "Let's go for a walk." "So you ever shot anything before?" "No." "Guns aren't really my sort of thing." "There was this one time when I was guarding a checkpoint." "And one of our guys he..." "just didn't like the look of this bloke as he was coming towards us." "So we all started yelling at him, inzil, inzil, adyi faouk!"" "Just telling him to get down on the ground, you know." "So he takes off his shirt, and he shows us he's wearing a vest with a bomb on it." "And he's walking towards us with this... this stupid fucking grin on his face." "And we're all screaming at him and people are running everywhere, women, little kids." "But this guy... man, this guy, he was as cool as they come." "My sergeant, he's there, he's yelling at me," ""take him down, take him down!"" "Problem was..." "I'd never actually shot anyone before." "So obviously I was shitting myself, I had the shakes, had the sweats, all the usual things you get when you've been told to shoot a guy dead." "Yeah." "So they're still barking at me, telling me to shoot this guy." "And he's getting closer and closer with this stupid fucking grin." "So I'm lying there in the dirt... looking at this bloke through the scope of my gun... and it suddenly dawns on me... that this guy... he actually wants to die." "There you go." " Sorry." " Nah, that's alright." "What happened to him?" "Yep, I killed him." "Through and through." "Big fucking mess." "But we found out later... he was crazy." "He'd just lost his wife and his kid." "Didn't have a bomb on him." "Just wanted to get shot." "Well..." " What happened to you?" " Gave me a medal." "I went to Thailand." "Got hooked on smack." "I fucked a lot." "Forgot who I was for about three years." "And I came back here..." "I got clean... and I built this place." "Anything else you want to know?" "This is the beginning of your healing." "You understand?" " Yes, Father." " You?" "It's just..." "I'm so fucking exhausted I can..." "What's the question again?" "You land on our doorstep and expect us to rescue you, you have to be prepared to go the whole journey." "It's not enough for us that you're not dead." "There's a few very basic rules." "You eat what you're given." "You do the drills without holding back and you work with the others in the community." "And you only talk about what you feel to me or Tom." " That clear?" " Yes, Father." "Yeah." "Show us your strength." " You've gotta be kidding me." " Come on, you're weak." " Shut up, Marcus." " Hit it, Travis." "Listen, I think that this is getting a bit out of hand." " Hit the bag!" " Just hit the bag, mate." " Just hit the bag?" " Just hit the bag." " Hit the bag." " Hit the fucking bag." " Hit the fucking bag." " Hit the bag!" "Just hit it!" " Hit the bag!" " Hit it, Travis!" " Hit the bag." " Come on, mate." "I can't do it." "I'm not doing this." "Go and get some rest, mate." "I need something." "I'm really sick." " Well, how about a run?" " That wasn't what I had in mind." "To heal... all my injuries." "To be safe." "To feel safe with myself." "To love... everyone." "Equally." "To find the joy in everything." "Even in pain." "To be a protector of the community." "To be powerful." "So that nothing and no one can harm our community." "This is the purpose of my life." "To touch people with music." "To show them the way out of their pain." "Come on!" "To walk the red road in peace." " So what do you feel?" " I feel sick." "That's because you're sick on the inside." "That's what your body's showing you." "You've been hiding behind your addiction and you've been hurting yourself." "But these feelings, it's just the advertising, it's just the wrapping, yeah?" "I don't understand." "I don't understand." "I don't understand what you're saying." " Do you get it?" " No, I don't get it." "It's your soul." "Do you get that?" "Hey, do you get it, do you fucking get it?" " I think so." " Then say it." " My soul..." " Your soul what?" "My soul is sick." "My soul is in pain." "See that's the tradeoff." "Pain... for freedom." "When I got back from Iraq, I was a mess, man." "I was a fucking mess." "Thought I was gonna die soon, so what's the point in living, yeah?" "Couldn't hold down a relationship." "Couldn't feel any emotions." "And then one day, I had a good look around and I realized:" "Holy fucking shit!" "Everyone's doing the same thing." "Everyone's terrified of finding their own truth." "And even more shit-scared of doing anything about it." "Yeah?" "Come on in, mate, it is fucking beautiful." "Come on." "So how do you feel?" " I don't feel anything, really." " Come on." "Hey, you're alive, aren't you, man?" "You alive now?" "No?" "Okay, how about now?" "How about now?" "Now?" " Come on" " What are you doing?" "What are you gonna do about it?" "What are you fucking afraid of?" "What are you gonna fucking do about it?" "Come on, come on." "There you go!" "Now is there anything you want to say to me?" " Stay the fuck way from me!" " Yes!" "Come on, Trav, wait up, mate." "I don't want your fucking help, okay?" "Okay." "You're free to go." "Take the old merc if you like, it's nothing flash but it'll get you where you need to go." "Grab the keys will you please, Tom?" "There's a map in the glovebox, just let us know where you leave the car when you get to town, okay, Travis?" " Travis!" " What?" " The cars are this way, mate." " Fucking shit!" " Fuck!" " Just give it a bit more choke." "Wait here." "Life crisis is spirit crisis, Trav." "Your doctors... kept you away from that knowing because they didn't want you looking in." "You're still right in the guts of your addiction, mate." "I don't know who I am anymore." "I don't know how to live." "That's why Tom brought you here." "Because right now there's nothing holding you together." "But if you can feel your pain, then you can feel your real self." "Yeah?" "Ask me." " Ask you what?" " You know." " Help me." " Mean it." " Help me." " Mean it." "Help me." "Help me." "Help me." "Like this?" "Like this?" "Is this the game?" " Is this the game?" "Hit the bag." " There's the anger." " The anger?" "Fuck off!" " Chickenshit." "I'm a chickenshit, am I?" "I'm a chickenshit." "Chickenshit, am I?" "Is that..." "how's that for fucking chickenshit?" "Like that?" "Get it!" "Violin's your favorite isn't it, Trav?" "Is this what you want?" "Okay." "Come on." "Come on." "Come on." " Come on, mate." " Come on, mate." "There's the anger, come on." "Kill the bag, Travis." "Kill the bag." " Harder." " Let it out mate, let it out." "Travis, let yourself go, mate!" "Come on!" " Come on, give it." " Harder." "Harder." "Harder..." "Die!" "Who are you angry with?" "Who are you angry with?" "Who are you angry with?" "Who are you angry with?" "Hey." " Hey." " What are you taking?" "Just things are... starting to get on top of me a little bit here and... and it feels really heavy." "I come home and it feels really heavy and I just..." "I don't know where to go and it just..." "It's all just fucking stacking on top of each other, you know?" "Okay." "Travis." " What?" " I just want to help you, Trav." " You just want to help me?" " Yeah." "You... want to help me?" "Come on." "Oh, my..." "Yeah, laugh, laugh, you can't fucking talk, though." "No, no, no." "No." "What the..." "Open the door!" "I know I'm fucked up but at least I can feel!" "You're such a kid." "You're such a kid and you're scared, Travis!" "Fuck!" "Travis just look at me!" "Talk to me!" "You're fucked." "Completely fucked." "Who do you want to talk to?" "You're me." "What do you want to say to yourself?" "For as long as I can remember..." "I've hated you." "You've always had a special way of... fucking everything up." "Travis, it's me, again." "You don't have to pick up." "I know you're listening, though." "I hope you're listening." "Tell me." "You were always pretending." "You're a pretender." "Oh, God." "I knew you were a frightened child." "I knew it when I first met you." "It was okay, 'cause I thought that..." "It doesn't matter what I thought now, really, does it?" "It's so beautiful up here." "It's like the top of the world." "I can see everything." "I've just been trying to run away." "I've just been running and running and running." " Look at me." " I don't want to look at you." "I'm so sick of looking at you." "I just... you make me sick." "And now somebody's dead because of you." "Because of what you did." "So what now?" "I just..." "I just want to get rid of you." "I just..." "I don't want to be filled with that hatred, all the time." "And when I'm gone... what's left?" "I don't know." "Just nothing." "Just nothing." "Good." "Thank you." " Thank you." " Welcome, brother." " Thank you." " Welcome, Travis." " We love you, Travis." " Welcome, Travis." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Okay." "I'm really glad you're healing." "Me too." "It's important for who you can be." "Yeah." "And who you can be with." "To be a soldier of peace." "To stand by Jay's side." "To live in love." "This is the purpose for my life." "To find the joy in everything." "Even in pain." "That is the purpose of my life." "To touch people with music." "To show them there's meaning and take them out of their pain." "To share myself." "And only this." "This is the purpose of my life." "To forgive those who tarnished me." "To forgive myself." "This is the purpose my soul has chosen for my life." "I think that I always wanted to heal people." "And somewhere along the way, I forgot that." "But, yeah, I think..." "that's the purpose of my life." " How's it look?" " Trust me." " It looks good." " Okay." "You need to be exposed to what he did to you, and how you feel about it." "Do you understand?" "You have to feel your pain." "That's the grief of letting go." "And then it won't affect you anymore." "Now you're connected to your pain, you can look out from yourself." "And now you can be with that special someone whose soul feels the same as yours." "Thank you, Jay." "Hey." "Hey." " How you doing?" " Yeah." "You learn so much, right?" "I mean, I'm only starting to see how far away from myself I was." "You've been working really hard too." "I think we're at that point where we're gonna start breaking away from ourselves." " So you're feeling like you..." " it's like a calling, isn't it?" "Once you start you just gotta keep on going." "I've been so stupid." " I don't think that you're stupid..." " No." "It's okay." "I know." "Trying to get people in the city to like me..." "You know, I was never gonna be good at being that person." "Neither were you." "Right?" "Right." "I went swimming in the lake today." "And I took a long walk in the woods." "It's beautiful there." "This whole place is beautiful." "You don't know how disconnected you are until somebody shows you." "Letting go of that person..." "I'm excited." "I'm really excited." "I saw you and Jay in the woods." "No, you didn't." "Marcus." "Travis." "I need to be by myself for a bit." "You don't have to pretend." "What do you mean?" "I know you wanted me to follow you down here." " Okay, just wait." "Wait a minute." " It's alright." "It's not alright." "You're free now." "We can be together." "We're like two drops out of the ocean." "You need to stop talking like that." "It's not right." "None of this is right." "After everything we've done for you." "You haven't got the courage." "Alright, thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls." "If I could have your attention, please." "Tonight is a very special night, as we celebrate Marcus's victory after a long, hard-fought battle." "Now Marcus has had to overcome a lot of obstacles, a lot of demons." " Marcus..." " But with love, we can heal." " Can't we?" "Yeah" " Yeah." " It's one thing to sit there and say..." " It's time to go." "...I feel pain." "But it's another thing entirely to get off your butt and do something about it, isn't it?" " You see, pain..." " This isn't right." "Yeah, it is." "This is right." "This is where I belong." "If you come with me I can get you some help." "Marcus is getting all the help he needs, he was very courageous today." "Is that what you were doing?" "You force him to have sex with you and you call it... you call it helping?" " I didn't do that." " I saw you." "I didn't do that, Travis." "Well, I want to hear it from Marcus." "Marcus, did you want that?" "Yeah, I think you might be a little confused as to what you saw today." "Right, if I hadn't pushed Marcus into some sort of action we would've lost him forever to his own fear, and I won't apologize for that." "I will never apologize for taking drastic action to heal someone." "You drag him here, he's got nobody, nothing else and..." "And now that he depends on you, you pull him apart." "You see, therapists like Travis, they call this transference." "Travis is putting his problems onto me because he can't face them himself." "You're still just a scared little boy, desperately seeking the attention of his dad, aren't ya?" " This isn't about me." " And now we're seeing the real you." "See, you so badly want the love that you can never have, but the bad news is..." "You've got to have courage to love, Travis." "You're the one with the disorder, mate." "Marcus, this is supposed to be a beautiful night for you." " Do you feel good?" "Does it feel nice?" " Don't ruin this for me." "You've got to get out of here!" "How many of you know what's going on?" " How many has it happened to?" " Excuse me," " is anyone else here feeling anger?" " Yeah, who's angry with this filthy liar?" "Hey, come on, be honest." "Be honest." "You see this is the classic example of a sociopath." "He's dead to himself, so he'll use you instead." "He'll say that he feels exactly what you want him to feel, but it's all selfishness." "He lies... doesn't feel a thing." "Jay, did you really do that?" "Marcus?" " Marcus!" " Get this weak creature out of here." "I don't know about you guys but I can't stand to look at him anymore." "Tom, how can you stand by?" "How can you stand back here, man?" "How can you stand back?" "How can any of you let this happen?" "How can any of you let it happen?" "Travis is feeling a lot of jealousy at the moment." "A lot of pain." "But tonight is not about Travis." " What are you doing... please!" " Tonight's about Marcus." "It's about his bravery." "It's about his courage." "It's about his commitment." "You're a very brave man, Marcus, look at me, mate." "You're a very, very, brave man." "And we welcome you aboard the farm community." "We all love you, mate." "Well done, Marcus." " What the fuck is going on?" " You're leaving." "Now." "Come on." " Tom..." " Don't..." "Don't say anything." " Brother, come on..." " You're not my brother anymore." "You don't exist." "Tom!" "Please?" " Tom..." " Shut up." "Come on." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Grace!" " Grace!" " Oh, Jesus..." "Tom, just keep driving!" " Put the gun down, Marcus." " No." " Come on!" " Start the car, Tom!" "I'm ordering you to drop the weapon, do it now!" "You lied to me." "You lied to me!" "You're not seeing things clearly, mate." "Your pain is making you lose your way." "Is that what you really want?" "Liar!" "Marcus." " I love you, Marcus." " No!" "Jay!" "No!" "No!" "No... no!" "No!" " He's Al... he's alright." " Marcus!" " He's alright!" " Somebody help him!" "No, he's alright, I said, stay the fuck away!" " Help him!" " No, I said he's okay!" "Marcus." "Marcus." "This isn't what you wanted, is it?" "Let me hear you say it." "Marcus, let me hear you say it, this isn't what you wanted." "This isn't what I wanted." "I know that." "Marcus." "I know that this is hard." "But it's gonna be okay." "Marcus, look at me." "Marcus, it's gonna be okay." "It's gonna be okay, let me hear you say it." "Let me hear you say it." " It's gonna be okay." " That's it Marcus, it's gonna be okay." "It's gonna be okay." "Marcus." "Marcus." " It's gonna be okay." " It's gonna be okay." " It's gonna be okay." " It's gonna be okay." "Marcus." "Marcus?" "Listen to my voice, Marcus." "Look at me." "Marcus..." "Give me the gun, Marcus." "Marcus." "This... is me showing my pain." "Marcus, no!" " Here... no, I can help him." " Keep away from him!" "I can help him, I can help him!" "Don't move him, don't move him." "You don't want to move him." "Tom, let me help him, you don't want to move him!" "Tom, just let me help him." " I can't stop the bleeding." " Please, I'm a doctor if you just..." " Shut your fucking mouth." " Toby if he can help..." "No!" "Don't let him." "Travis, get down here." " Someone really needs to look at this." " Could you do it." "I can't." "I don't have the equipment and someone needs to look at this now." " No." " No." "Please, Jay, just let us help you." "I've seen what it's like when you're near the end." "I'm not afraid of it." "The ones who ran... they'll go straight to the police." "That's alright." "They'll have to live their days knowing that they ran." " If we tell the police what happened..." " No." "You know what they'll do." "They don't need an excuse." "We've been betrayed." "Travis's pain... has caused this." "They'll be here soon." "With their anger... and their threats." "We'd better not be here when they come." "We love you, Jay." " We love you, Jay." " We love you, Jay." "We love you, Jay." "Tom, don't do this." "No!" "Get out." "Get out, come on." "Now!" "To be myself." "To find truth." "To be a mother." "I always wanted to be a mother." "To fall in love." "To be free." "To be truly free." " Tom." " Don't turn around." "Stop." "I'm sorry." "The road about three kilometers that way, just go." "Tom, what's happening?" "There's nothing left." "Just go." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "Oh, fuck." "I love you, Jay." "I fucking love you too, Andy." "See you on the other side, my brother." "I love you too, Ben." "See you on the other side." "So much love." "What would you like to say?" "Sorry, Jay." "I couldn't do it." "But..." "I'm going to make it up to you, I will, I..." "I'm ready to show them the agony that I can see in their hearts." "In the land of the blind the one eyed girl is queen." "I love you, Jay." "Come on." "I want people to know that you... you can be real." "We really had something here." "We had it in the palm of our hand." "We live the right way." "The way we're meant to live." "Just open your eyes, people." "And everyone 'neath the vine and fig tree shall live in peace..." "Drinking to you, Jay." "I love you, Jay." "The train on platform number seven goes to Creston..." "Please stand clear." "Doors closing." "Attention passengers." "This train is an express train to..." "Creston." "This train's first stop will be Creston." "Excuse me." "Would you like to ask a question with me, ma'am?" "How about you, sir, would you like to ask a question with me?" "Everybody..." "Look, I know you've been ignoring me, but today's a really special day." "Today you're going to learn about the kind of life you've led and... and the impact that life has had on other people." "Today you're going to learn the purpose of your life." "To not listen to any more street preacher bullshit?" "I reckon that's the purpose of my life." "Thanks for sharing." "I believe that our ignorance and our blindness have made this world unlivable." " Jesus!" " She's got a gun." "Jay taught us to see the pain of the injuries inside us." "And he taught us to see the enemies within us." "He was made to kill people in a false and unjust war and... damaged him deeply but... he returned home to make a world of peace for everyone and... he believed that our pain is within ourselves and... that we need to release that pain to give ourselves the gift... to give ourselves the gift of freedom." " Do you understand that?" " Yes." " I said, can you understand that?" " Yes." "Okay, I'm going to give you all a brochure and... and... and you'll notice that on the inside there are some lyrics to a song." "Sorry if I don't have enough for everyone." "If you don't get one you can just look on with your neighbor." "One... two... three." "And everyone neath their vine and fig tree..." "Stop!" "You need to do it louder." "Okay?" "And everyone neath their vine and fig tree" "Shall live in peace and unafraid." "And everyone neath their vine and fig tree" "Shall live in peace and unafraid" "And into ploughshares turn their swords" "Nations shall learn war no more" "And into ploughshares turn their swords..." "Attention passengers." "Please remain seated." " It's okay." " We apologize for the delay." " What are you doing?" " I was looking for you." "Jay's gone." "I know." "I'm sorry." " I need to make them understand." " We do, don't we?" "Just keep the gun on me." "Everyone listen to what Grace is telling you." "She's giving you a chance to learn the truth." "Is that right, Grace?" "Is that what we're doing?" "Stop!" "Just stop lying!" "You don't believe in anything." "Jay died trying to save you and every single person in this world." " He loved too much." " No, he didn't." " Yes, he did." " No, he didn't." "I wasn't strong enough." "I'm not strong enough." "Do you remember meeting me on this train?" "I'd be dead if it wasn't for you." "I was in so much pain, Grace." "I did something wrong, I did something really wrong." "I caused so much damage." "And I was so scared." "Just like you are." "I didn't want to live anymore." "But you never gave up on me, did you?" "Everyone's gone." "Tom." "Marcus, my mum." "I know, but they're not brave like you." "I just want to be with the others now." " You want to be with them." " Yeah." "You want to be with them?" "Okay." "Okay, well, let's do it." "Let's do it." "Shoot me and then shoot yourself but I think that you should do it quickly because you are really scaring these people." "Do it." "You were right." "We're like two drops out of the ocean and I'm really glad I met you." "So do it." "Shoot me." "Do it!" "I don't want to." "I don't want to be like them." "You're not." "You're not like anyone I've ever met." "It's okay." "It's okay." " I'm sorry." " It's okay." "We just have to keep being brave." "Okay?" "We just keep being brave." "I'm sorry." "I think you should tell them that." "I'm sorry." "We're really sorry, everyone." "We'll just wait now for the police to come." "There's no bullets in the gun." "Everyone's going to be okay." "Everything's going to be okay." "For as long as I can remember," "I've hated you." "You've always had a special way... of fucking everything up." "It's so beautiful up here." "It's like the top of the world." "I can see everything." "You're always pretending." "You're a pretender." "Pretending to care." "Pretending to be a good person." "But when it really comes down to it..." "You're just a frightened child." "It's so beautiful up here." "It's like the top of the world." "I can see everything." "I guess that's it." "You're really not coming, are you?" "It just feels like a bad dream." "And every morning on the farm we'd wake up and we'd tell each other how much we loved our world and everyone in it." "And we were loved." "But they all left and..." "I didn't want to stay but I didn't know what to do." "And you chose not to go with the others?" "I know one person can do something so brave that they can fix their soul." "Otherwise what's the point?" "Can I go now?"