"Well, she doesn't..." "Well, she doesn't want me to be myself." "(SIGHS) She objects..." "She objects to everything I do." "She dislikes my friends." "She thinks I drink." "She criticises me all the time." "There's nothing else I can do, is there?" "I mean, I have to live here, don't I?" "(CHUCKLES)" "I wouldn't call it that, no." "I don't think I'm enjoying myself all that much." "I mean..." "DOCTOR:" "For some time, I have been studying the families of schizophrenic patients." "What you will see are extracts from interviews with the family of one of these patients, Kate Winter." "When Kate re-entered hospital, my research into her case had, of necessity, to cease." "(SCREAMS)" "She's sick, isn't she?" "DOCTOR:" "Sick?" "Yes, that's what I call it." "You see, Doctor, Kate is a girl for whom we have done everything that is possible." "I'm sure you have." "But Kate still feels that something is missing." "Ah, yes, but surely that's the business of the daughter or the son." "However much you do for them, they still want that little bit more." "DOCTOR:" "Can you tell me why you think she's sick?" "Well, see what I'm trying to say..." "You see, you've only got to look at her." "To look at her?" "Uh..." "No, I don't mean look, I mean listen." "Listen to what she says and what she does." "She's killing her mother." "Yes." "Well, you see, one of Kate's delusions is, well, you understand, is that her mother is killing her." "Oh, yes, I know." "But, I mean, that's just plain nonsense." "Surely you know that, being a doctor." "You see, as I've already said, here's a girl, she's had everything that it is possible to do done for her, and look what happens." "There's the drinking." "And all the other stuff as well." "Good afternoon." "Hello." "I don't believe I've done your hair before, have I?" "No." "What can I do for you?" "I want it all cutting off, please." "Do you?" "What length did you want it?" "I'm not sure, really." "Long bob?" "Shorter than that, like that?" "What do you think?" "I know a style that will suit you." "If I cut it short here, at the back, but raising it here and having two pieces swinging forward." "One of the girls has the style herself, if you want to see it on her." "I'll go fetch her, won't be a minute." "DOCTOR:" "So then, Kate drinks, Mrs Winter?" "MRS WINTER:" "Well, not what you'd call drinking." "DOCTOR:" "But your husband said she drinks." "MRS WINTER:" "Jerry's very hard on drinking." "He doesn't like it." "And in a young girl, too." "Well, it's just not our way, is it?" "It's not how we were taught." "DOCTOR:" "What I'm trying to get at is, how much does she drink?" "Does she get drunk?" "Drunk, our Katie?" "What's Jerry been saying to you?" "I mean, are we trying to get this out in the open or aren't we?" "DOCTOR:" "So Katie drinks but she doesn't get drunk?" "I think we can safely say we brought that girl up to know how to behave." "But she does go in pubs." "With all sorts." "She talks to them." "That is her illness." "You think her illness makes her talk to people that she shouldn't talk to?" "She's brought shame on this house, to me and to her father." "And all we try to do is to help her, and do what's best for her." "But she defies us." "Does Mr Winter go to the pub?" "What are you suggesting, young man?" "I was suggesting nothing, Mrs Winter." "I asked if Mr Winter went to the pub." "Well, he's a man, isn't he?" "He's entitled to a drink." "He has his drink." "And that's that." "He doesn't get drunk?" "Nobody in this house gets drunk, Doctor." "Including Kate?" "Nobody." "Including Katie." "We're respectable people here." "We know what's what and that's how we brought up our Katie." "You don't want to go listening to her." "Do you listen to her, Mrs Winter?" "Do I listen?" "Do I do anything else?" "But after all, she is my Katie, you know?" "And I love her." "DOCTOR:" "Kate." "Yes, the Kate that's dead." "She's dead?" "Yeah, she's been killed, hasn't she?" "By her." "Doctor?" "Yes?" "KATE:" "Do you love me?" "DOCTOR:" "What do you think?" "KATE:" "Well, do you fancy me?" "DOCTOR:" "Why have you been crying?" "KATE:" "You're just the same as all the rest." "You won't just answer me." "DOCTOR:" "Are you alive?" "KATE:" "I am, yeah." "She isn't." "DOCTOR:" "Because your mother..." "KATE:" "Oh, she doesn't want me to live." "DOCTOR:" "Why is that?" "KATE:" "Oh, she'd go mad if I lived." "(CRYING) She won't..." "She won't..." "Oh, you're a really rotten bitch and you hate me." "DOCTOR:" "Why do I hate you?" "She hates sex." "She thinks I'm a whore." "DOCTOR:" "How many boyfriends did you have?" "KATE:" "Oh, I've had lots." "Lots before I got ill." "I get so lost, you know." "I get so confused." "I mean, I can't do anything right, you see." "Well, sometimes I sort of lie in bed half the time, you know, and I just can't move." "It's frightening." "My mother's very kind then, you know." "DOCTOR:" "Is she?" "KATE:" "Yeah, she brings me up what I want to eat, my favourite meals and things." "She looks after me a lot." "I mean, I've got to get better for their sakes, don't you see?" "DOCTOR:" "You mean you want to be what they want you to be?" "KATE:" "I suppose." "I suppose that's what I mean, really, but when I behave like this, I hurt her." "She's going grey over me." "I suppose it's natural." "I mean, I can't keep a job, I get bad-tempered, and I've had this abortion." "I suppose that was a terrible shock for her." "I really am wicked." "Did you have any special boyfriend?" "Yes." "One chap I was really fond of." "He was an actor." "What was his name?" "Jake Morrison." "My mum and dad don't like people like that, you know." "They sort of think they're a bit flighty." "I mean, they think half of them are queer." "But I suppose I do, really." "He was very good to me, though." "Oh, we had a gay time together." "We'd go to these discotheque places and dancing and..." "We used to go to these pubs down by the river in Hammersmith." "Used to like that." "Nothing like that around here, you know." "Do you like my hair long?" "Jake used to like it long." "I like it long." "My mother doesn't like it, though." "She thinks I look like one of them beatniks." "Maybe I'll get it cut." "Was it his child that you aborted?" "Jake's?" "Oh, no." "No, no, no." "She had it by someone else." "I'm not like that, you know." "She doesn't really let you have her mouth." "You just sort of lean in and kiss her where she happens to turn." "So you turn and kiss her sort of there." "Where are you gonna turn?" "Whichever way she wants." "(ALL LAUGH)" "It's sort of a miss rather than a proper kiss." "Something must be spinning around in your head, surely." "Just a big blank." "Warmth and comfort and sleepiness." "I love you." "And I love you." "Do you take sugar?" "DOCTOR:" "Yes, thank you." "Ah, I'm sorry." "All right?" "DOCTOR:" "Yes, fine." "It was good of you to see me." "Don't be daft." "If it'll help Kate." "Were you in love with her?" "Well, I wouldn't say that." "Were you fond of her, then?" "Yeah, I was fond." "I was fond, all right." "What do you do when you wake up with a girl beside you and she says her mother's shouting at her?" "She meant it literally." "Her mother was screaming at her." "Calling her names." ""Filthy little tart," things like that." "Then she'd go into these, well, trances." "Sort of..." "Trances, you know what I mean?" "Not yet." "Look, we'd be at a party or somewhere and suddenly she'd go stiff." "Dead stiff." "And she'd start crying." "And she couldn't explain it." "She once said..." "She said her mother could sit at home and watch Kate." "Whatever she was doing, wherever she was." "On the telly." "Could watch her and me in bed." "I don't want to give the wrong impression, I cared." "But, my God, that family of hers..." "I wouldn't be surprised if her mother did have a private telly network." "Well, it makes sense as a joke then, doesn't it?" "Yeah, I see what you mean." "Do you?" "Look, I'm not a psychiatrist, am I?" "A cigar, very brash, and a beautiful girlfriend." "She looked English." "Sort of slicked down straight hair, and a white, white face and big, black eyes." "She was looking very bored with the whole thing." "DOCTOR:" "Kate told me that she felt out of her depth in your world." "She was a cocky little kid." "Some bastards go for that sort of thing." "I don't think I did her any harm." "When I discovered she was ill, well, I..." "You dropped her." "I don't have to defend myself to you, do I?" "Of course you don't." "I meant it strictly as a factual question." "Yeah, well, I stopped seeing her, yeah." "Did you tell her why you stopped seeing her?" "(CHUCKLES) Not really." "What did you tell her?" "Well, you don't say, "Look, darling, I don't dig schizophrenics."" "Is that what she is, then?" "How should I know?" "You used the word." "Oh." "I'm sorry." "Has your ma got a telly set watching you?" "If Kate feels she's being watched, then for her she is being watched." "Look, I told her she was..." "MAN:" "Okay, you've all had your coffee, we'll take it from the top of scene 15." "That's Annie, Tom..." "She knew that, I mean..." "She was getting help, wasn't she?" "Professional help." "DOCTOR:" "Yes." "Yes, she was." "I just told her I got a small part." "Ajob abroad." "That was all right, wasn't it?" "(SIGHS) I know people don't like me, but I think that they do and I accuse them of it." "And I get..." "Well, it's in me, really, it's just something in my head." "Can't get rid of it." "I accuse them of lying." "I get frightened of people leaving me." "I was frightened of Jake leaving me." "He told me he got this part in a film and I just accused him of lying." "Well, when he came back" "I never saw him again." "I suppose he thought no more of her." "When you frightened yourself, you frighten other people away, don't you?" "I know what it is, it's just that" "I don't please people." "MRS WINTER:" "She was as near perfection as any little girl can be." "DOCTOR:" "You noticed nothing..." "MRS WINTER:" "No." "She was obedient, clean, always had a lovely little smile for you." "Never a tantrum." "Never a sign of temper." "Sweet child." "We never had a minute's trouble with her." "And what's more, she's still our Katie." "Still the same girl." "But with all this going on, well, she can't help it, can she?" "Would it have upset you if she had been troublesome as a little girl?" "No." "You know what children are." "I mean..." "Well, I don't think any mother thinks they brought an angel into the world now, do they?" "Well, children get naughty, but then they learn." "It's the art of growing up, isn't it?" "That's what I'd call growing up." "But you had none of this with Kate?" "Nothing out of the ordinary." "Her grandma used to say the same thing about me." "I often think that there's a lot of me in Kate." "That is, I mean, when she's being herself." "Speak up in future, girl." "If I want a prompt, I want it loud and clear." "Terribly sorry, folks, we'll carry on now." "(ALL LAUGHING)" "DOCTOR:" "Ah, good afternoon, Mr Winter." "Afternoon." "Come in, come in." "Thank you." "It's good of you to see me here." "Oh, not at all. (CHUCKLES)" "Uh, Dolly doesn't like this, you know." "She doesn't like the idea of me seeing you on me own." "Sit down, sit down." "Oh, thank you." "I wonder why that is." "Oh, she's a good woman, Dolly." "I mean, she's doted on that girl, you know?" "In fact, I can remember, when Katie was much younger, I used to say," ""You ought to be a bit more selfish, darling."" "Get out a bit because, you know, girl's old enough." "And after all, we only live once, don't we?" "Have you always got on with Kate?" "Well, I've never been allowed to, have I?" "I've never been let in on it, as you might say." "I don't quite follow." "Well, I've always felt that Dolly has stood in between me and Katie somehow." "You mean that Mrs Winter prevented you?" "Prevented?" "Oh, no, no." "Nothing like that, no." "Dolly would never prevent anybody from doing anything." "No, it's not that, it's not in her nature." "Well, you see, when Katie was much younger I used to pick her up, take her on me knee, bounce her up and down." "I used to make her laugh." "And I don't think that Mrs Winter cared for that." "Why not, do you think?" "Oh, I don't know." "I don't know." "It seemed to irritate her." "I think, well, quite frankly, that I wasn't much cop for her." "As far as they were concerned." "Oh, thank you." "You see, Dolly had her own little business." "And I think that they thought that I was after it, sort of thing." "I know for a fact that her mother had very different ideas about who Dolly should marry." "It's only natural after all, isn't it?" "(CHUCKLES) Trying to do the best for the daughter sort of thing." "If we can see Katie through this bit of trouble all right, then she'll have a chance afterwards to, you know, meet the right sort of fella." "Her mother will see to that." "She told you about Jake?" "Oh, yes, she told us." "She's always been very open with us." "This is something that we've encouraged." "But at the same time, you can't have these things going on night after night." "You know, being late and you don't know where they are or who they're with." "Perhaps you didn't like Jake?" "I never met him, but I didn't like the sound of him and I didn't like what he was doing to our Kate." "What was he doing, Mr Winter?" "Well, he was making her ill, wasn't he?" "Why don't you leave home?" "I can't." "Why not?" "It'd upset my mother." "(SCOFFS) Is that so bad?" "No, but nobody can just walk out like that, can they?" "Why not?" "Look, you can go if you want to, can't you?" "Well, why don't you?" "KATE:" "As soon as I have to make those sorts of decisions, I just feel unreal." "I just feel there isn't a me to choose for." "So, what's the point in upsetting her?" "Where would it get me?" "Can we have another coffee?" "Thanks." "Get you away from your family for a start, wouldn't it?" "Is that so important?" "Don't you think it is?" "Sometimes I want to go, but then I feel..." "I just feel like I can't." "You feel as though you can't but you can." "Honestly it's easier to do what she wants, that's all." "You're going to be defeated, aren't you then, Kate?" "It's not defeat." "Honestly I just don't like unnecessary trouble, that's all." "Very ordinary." "A bit stupid, if anything." "I didn't get in at the grammar school, and my mum and dad were really upset about that." "When you don't make the grade, you sort of lose interest, you give up." "Oh, I know the teachers, they tried." "I think we tired them out." "It wasn't as if I didn't want a good education either, I did." "What can you do if there's nothing exceptional about you, you know?" "If you haven't anything to convince anybody with." "You see the others?" "DOCTOR:" "I saw some of them." "Bet they told you some stuff." "I don't blame them anyway." "When it comes down to it, they're ashamed of me." "I don't blame them." "It's fabulous, isn't it?" "Getting quite brown." "Are you?" "Yes, it's a change from being inside." "Getting a lovely tan, you know." "You like it?" "Yeah." "Did you see Jake?" "Yes." "Is he working?" "Yes, he's doing a television play written by Peter." "Oh." "Expect he told you all about Peter." "Not very much." "Do you know, I couldn't believe it that I was going around with a real writer." "Me!" "Why not?" "It's just not my world, is it?" "What is your world?" "Well, don't know what I am or what I want." "DOCTOR:" "But if you imagined it?" "My sister, Mary, she got this job as a secretary, and she got her own flat." "She ran away from here when she was 17." "She got away." "Why didn't you go away?" "Couldn't, could I?" "Why not?" "I don't know, I just couldn't." "DOCTOR:" "Can you remember how it happened when you began to get ill?" "KATE:" "Well, they've told you, haven't they?" "DOCTOR:" "I want you to." "Well, I went for her with a bread knife, didn't I?" "That's what your parents say, certainly." "If they say it, it must be true, mustn't it?" "You see, she'd locked me out the night before." "You haven't got a key of your own?" "Oh, no, she'd offered me one, but what would I need a key for?" "She'd never locked me out before I got back." "She trusted me." "She said to come home at a reasonable time." "Anyway, when I got back, the door was locked, and I got frightened." "Well, I banged and banged on the door, but she..." "The bedroom light went on and she stuck her head out the window and she said I could do what I liked, but I couldn't come in." "Well, I got in this awful state, in this terrible temper, and I..." "I went off to stay the night with a girlfriend." "It was a Friday, wasn't it?" "MR WINTER:" "Yes, yes, it was Friday." "No, it wasn't, it was a Saturday because..." "Don't you remember?" "I said to her it didn't matter if she was a bit late in, being weekend, you know." "But it was the Sunday then and we could have a lie in." "MR WINTER:" "That's right, yes." "No, it was Saturday." "Yeah." "Had no intentions of locking her out." "Well, I mean, we'd hardly lock our own daughter out, would we?" "DOCTOR:" "But you told her you would." "MRS WINTER:" "Oh, well, I admit that, but... (SIGHS)" "I only wanted to give her a scare, sort of give her a fright, you know." "I mean, how did we know where she'd gone?" "But you didn't ask?" "Hadn't the time, had I?" "When I'd come downstairs, she'd gone off in a temper." "I mean, she's a grown girl." "I mean, she has a life of her own to lead." "Well, all the same, I think they could consider you a little bit." "I mean, tell you something so that you wouldn't sort of worry." "Because, after all, I tossed and turned all night, didn't I?" "I know your mother wouldn't have taken it from you, Dolly." "Oh, well, that's different." "I mean, things have changed, haven't they?" "I mean, we live in a different world." "Mmm-hmm." "Children are more free." "And what's more, they've a right to it." "And they expect it." "You know, she'd been..." "Been in trouble before." "Yes, the abortion." "Oh!" "Don't say that word to me." "I can't bear it." "I hate it." "You're against abortion?" "I am." "I think it's wicked." "And them that do it, well, they should be given life sentences." "But you did have Kate." "She's my daughter, Doctor." "And when the harm's done, it's done." "MR WINTER:" "Well, I think meself that she'd been a bit peculiar for quite some time with this baby business." "I mean, she..." "Well, she just wanted to keep it." "She wanted the baby?" "Yes, the baby." "She didn't want it." "She said she did, but I knew different." "How did you know?" "Well..." "I'm a woman, aren't I?" "I mean, I've carried two." "And I know what sort of woman can have all these funny moods when they're pregnant." "Pregnant with their husband, let alone somebody she doesn't even know or knows anything about." "She didn't even tell him." "DOCTOR:" "He knows nothing about the baby?" "She talked herself into having that baby." "DOCTOR:" "Then how did she come around to the abortion?" "Well, I pointed out that I knew how it would end up." "It would have been me that would have been lumbered with it." "Well, both of us, but me particularly." "Because, let's face it, a young girl, she gets over it, doesn't she?" "And then she starts going out, and wanting to go and find another job and all that." "Would have been me, wouldn't it?" "After all, she wasn't fit, was she?" "DOCTOR:" "Wasn't this before her illness?" "Oh, yes." "Um..." "But then, she hadn't been well for some time." "DOCTOR:" "So in the end, you persuaded her not to have the child?" "Persuaded her nothing." "I got our Katie to see what she already knew in her own mind." "DOCTOR:" "Can we come back to the Sunday morning when Katie stayed out all night?" "Aye." "She came slinking in..." "Aye." "Because she was frightened of you." "Frightened of what you were going to say to her." "Proper worked up, he was, when it's too late." "Oh, he can shout his mouth, then." "I never said a word to her." "No, it's a case of what she was expecting, wasn't it?" "I've never been one to crack down." "No." "She'd gone too far that time." "Look, as long as the girl is under my roof..." "Oh, you got your bigoted side." "Oh, Dolly, look..." "He's got his bigoted side." "Some days she can't do anything right." "Her hair's wrong, her clothes are wrong, everything's wrong." "Why don't you be open and tell the doctor the truth?" "It's what he's here for." "Admit you wanted a son." "But I've loved Katie from the minute that she was born." "Aye, and a right tomboy she'd have been if you'd had your way." "The Sunday morning, then." "Well, she was wrong in one thing." "There was no row." "There was no recriminations." "We just carried on as though she wasn't there." "I laid the breakfast, and I cut the bread," "and then I gave her the bread and the bread knife, and she's looking from one to the other of us, and she's crying." "But it was her to say something first, wasn't it?" "Not me." "And when she did, she gave me a fright, I can tell you." "DOCTOR:" "What did she say?" "(SIGHS)" "She said, "You killed my baby."" "She picks up the knife and goes for Dolly." "Well, she actually threw it at me." "DOCTOR:" "But she missed you completely though." "It fell at my feet." "Oh, yes, but, I mean, there was no mistaking it." "I mean, she threw at it Dolly." "DOCTOR:" "What did you do then?" "Well, uh, Katie ran upstairs, she was crying, and Dolly was crying." "Well, in the end I had to get our doctor in, and that was the first time that she had one of these fits." "DOCTOR:" "Fits?" "Aye, fits." "Well, I don't know what you'd call them." "When the doctor got upstairs, she was..." "Well, she was stiff as a poker on the bed, and she wouldn't move, she wouldn't speak." "I had to tell him that she'd attacked her mother." "And, oh, we had a terrible day." "I'm telling you, terrible day." "You and Mrs Winter did?" "Yes." "We did." "I don't want to go to the doctor." "It was your idea." "You suggested it." "I said maybe you ought to see a doctor, and you agreed." "Now, if you hadn't agreed, we wouldn't be coming, would we?" "What does he know about it?" "He's a doctor." "I know he's a doctor, but what does he know?" "Well, you said yourself you haven't been feeling very well lately." "But, Mum, I said I wanted to see somebody..." "You said maybe you ought to see a doctor." "You've just admitted it was you." "MRS WINTER:" "I've had enough of it." "We're going straight back." "Oh, come on, Mother, come on." "KATE:" "The following week, I went into the mental hospital." "Well, they talked it over with me, and I decided it was the best thing to do." "(STAMMERING) It's as if somebody else inside me..." "Somebody else chucked that knife." "DOCTOR:" "Now, who would that somebody be?" "What?" "Who would that somebody be?" "That's something I'll never know, isn't it?" "Why not?" "Well, all I want to do is to get better." "When I get better, I won't have that feeling of being somebody else." "What do they call it?" "Ah, it's a delusion, that's what they call it." "I mean, normal people don't have those sort of feelings, do they?" "Well, when I start to get better, I can tell because..." "Well, I can tell through my mother because she gets happier, you know." "She's not so worried, and I can tell because, well, we just don't have any rows." "You know, we go out shopping together or something, and there are no conflicts." "Well, that's how I can tell that I'm improving." "DOCTOR:" "When you think about sin, or that you have sinned, what does it mean to you?" "I suppose it's, um, hurting other people, isn't it?" "And when other people hurt you?" "Well, they don't." "That way I'm lucky." "They don't." "It's probably the other way around." "They're far too lenient with me." "This other person inside you, you're sure it's a bad you?" "I'd say that I've learnt that." "Something I've had to learn." "Other people do it, and they're normal, responsible people." "There's just another Kate who just won't learn." "Except when she's on drugs and tranquilisers." "Then she keeps quiet." "DOCTOR:" "One evening when I came to your house, you'd seen something on television that upset you." "You talked about your other Kate then." "KATE:" "Yeah, they haven't got rid of her." "DOCTOR:" "You mean the hospital?" "KATE:" "Yep." "DOCTOR:" "Is that what you want them to do?" "KATE:" "Naturally." "I don't want to be mad, do I?" "I want to be like I am now." "Able to talk." "At least to you anyway." "Just think not to be awful." "Should I go back to the hospital," "I shan't come out again." "Why?" "They know where they are with you there, they know where you stand." "They know what to expect of you." "That way it's a sort of relief being in the hospital." "They know where they are, you know." "Well, things become sort of regulated." "And that gives you some relief?" "Yes." "It's like being a kid again, you know." "You fall down and hurt yourself, somebody comes along and picks you up." "They get on with looking after you, and you get on with feeling your pain." "And where's your pain when you're on tranquilisers?" "Oh, it's a long way away." "But I have that feeling of being unreal, you know." "I don't feel anything at all, really." "Can you tell me about this feeling unreal?" "Well, it's like a machine." "All the bits are sort of whirring and ticking, and only it's a thing, a machine." "It's not me." "And I'm outside this machine." "Sort of standing there watching..." "Only the I that's outside isn't real either." "(LAUGHS) Do you know, once I thought I was operated by remote control like a robot." "Yes, I get dizzy when I think about it because you can't..." "My mind just won't..." "What do you..." "You can't put it into words." "You can't express it." "It's just something that you feel." "MR WINTER:" "Hello, Mary." "Hello, Dad." "KATE:" "Hello, Mary." "Hello, Kate." "DOCTOR:" "Hello." "Hello." "This is Katie's sister Mary." "How do you do?" "DOCTOR:" "I'm glad you could find the time." "It's all right." "Well now, Dolly, you sit down here." "She's got quite a good job has our Mary, with a big firm, haven't you?" "Mother, I wrote and told you six months ago," "I gave up that job and I've started modelling." "That's what I wanted to do, so I saved up to do it." "Oh, well, like you say, you're between jobs as it were." "I don't see what that's got to do with Kate." "She got character, has that one." "Too much of it, some might say." "MARY:" "I didn't come here to bicker with you, Mother." "Are you going to help your sister or aren't you?" "Because that's what we're supposed to be here for." "You'll gather she's risen above us, this one." "MARY:" "Wouldn't have to get very far up to do that, would I?" "Mary, I'm not going to have you talking to your mother like that." "Listen, Jerry." "The doctor's got a mind of his own." "Well, I just don't see what the point is of having us all here together." "DOCTOR:" "Why did you agree to come?" "Because you asked me to." "And I'm here, so..." "So?" "Look, you're here to help us, not to hinder." "You're no example to your sister." "Listen, Dad, shall I tell you something?" "You know, you didn't like me leaving home, should I tell you why?" "It meant she couldn't..." "That's enough of that." "She could go at you a bit more." "And you should have left it all." "Left the two of them to get at it and argue happily together." "KATE:" "Mary, you shouldn't speak like that." "I'm sorry." "Look, you know, you're not ill." "You're weak." "I'm sorry, but I've got to speak my mind, so that's what I'll do for you." "Mary, look, would somebody who's weak want to attack their mother with a knife?" "Did she attack you, Mother?" "Really?" "I've told you." "I mean, she wasn't just playing with the knife, you know, angry like?" "Are you doubting me words?" "MARY:" "Oh, no." "It's like being with a bloody detective." "DOCTOR:" "Yes, it's very like that." "Yeah, well, I'm no witness." "I mean, I left years ago." "Seemed trouble since the moment I was born, so as soon as I could thumb my nose at them, I did." "MRS WINTER:" "Mary!" "Listen, Kate, you could come live with me." "You know, I kept writing to you about it, haven't I?" "MRS WINTER:" "She doesn't want to." "How do you know?" "MRS WINTER:" "Ask her." "Well?" "Mary, love, you don't want somebody like me on your hands." "MRS WINTER:" "Now, look here, she's a sick girl." "Can't you get that in your head?" "Yes, something called schizophrenia, isn't it?" "DOCTOR:" "That's the hospital's diagnosis." "What are you messing about in all this for?" "DOCTOR:" "Kate's case was referred to me by a friend at the hospital, and Kate herself came to see me." "What are you going to do then?" "DOCTOR:" "I have no direct authority from the hospital, but my researches may help Kate." "Well, I hope it does." "Just look at her." "It's her mind you're messing about with, you know." "MRS WINTER:" "Now that's it." "I've had enough." "You should never have come home in the first place." "Look, I love this kid." "I want to know what you're going to do about her." "DOCTOR:" "Is that why you want her to come live with you?" "Dead right." "Get her out the way from these lot." "DOCTOR:" "Were you and Kate very close as children?" "No!" "(CRYING) Any girl'd go mad if see saw her sister in this state, wouldn't they?" "DOCTOR:" "Were you and Kate very close?" "It don't matter, love, it's all right." "Don't cry." "DOCTOR:" "Kate?" "What?" "Oh, sorry." "He wants to talk to you, love." "Talk to him." "He wants you to." "KATE:" "What?" "DOCTOR:" "Kate?" "MARY:" "She's listening to you." "Go on." "DOCTOR:" "Can you look at me, Kate?" "Why are you crying?" "I can't bear it any more, seeing this." "God, love her." "It's a shame." "(SCREAMS)" "I'm going mad!" "DOCTOR:" "Mrs Winter, why do you object to Kate going to live with Mary?" "Well, is she a fit person?" "Domineering, bossy." "I don't think so." "DOCTOR:" "Why do you think Mary left home to begin with?" "Hmm, she got it into her head she'd go, and that's that." "There's no stopping her when she gets anything in her head." "MARY:" "Why don't you tell him the truth why I left home?" "You know, you look at it, she's so..." "I feel sorry for her." "I mean, she's..." "She's so bitter, you know?" "She's got evil, and there are very few evil people." "My mother's one and I shouldn't say that." "MR WINTER:" "Look, I'm sorry." "Look, I'm not going to take any more of this." "You've said quite enough today." "You've got a wicked tongue, Mary." "And that's all there is to it." "And this is the last time you're coming over that threshold." "I can tell you that for a start." "DOCTOR:" "What do you think of your father, Mary?" "(STAMMERING) Sorry, Doctor, I'm sorry." "I'm not going to take any more." "This is my house and I'm afraid that I'm just..." "For once I'm going to put my foot down." "MARY:" "It's his house, you know, he's been told by his wife since..." "Listen, I'll tell the doctor." "Let me tell the doctor, Mary." "Right?" "I just seem to be..." "You know, the two of us, we just seem to be sort of like little ornaments, you know, dressed well, look nice, and just to put on show for them." "There was no love there." "They never loved us." "Look, I'm sorry, Doctor." "This just is not true, you know." "You've got a nasty mind, Mary, and there's no getting away from it." "MARY:" "I feel sorry for you really, I do." "DOCTOR:" "Mary, why did you call Kate weak?" "Well, she..." "MRS WINTER:" "I can answer that." "I can answer that one for you." "Katie respected her mother and Mary, she didn't." "She thought that was being weak." "MR WINTER:" "Exactly." "Look, she's weak because she won't leave this house." "Look at her, she's dreamy, you know." "And she..." "You should learn to spit in some people's faces, Kate, you wouldn't be in this state you're in today." "Why should I if I don't want to?" "I mean, she loses her jobs and everything, and now it's all come on at her again and she's trying to be mentally unbalanced, she says she is." "Well, it's not that." "I mean, she's just weak." "I mean, that's what mental illness is, isn't it?" "She just won't face up to life." "Look at her." "(SNIFFLES)" "I hope you're bloody satisfied, you two." "DOCTOR:" "Your mother says you've been feeling unwell again and you want to go back into hospital." "Do you feel you can't manage outside, Kate?" "Did your sister upset you?" "Sorry, what did you say?" "Did Mary upset you?" "I think there was a lot of truth in what she said." "In what way?" "Well, I'm just getting back what I deserve, aren't I?" "I'm just weak." "In fact, with Jake, I was just picked up." "I just got romantic and silly about him being an actor." "They're such different people, aren't they?" "No better or worse than anybody else but..." "I'm immoral." "Can people be sort of born immoral?" "How would you describe a moral person then?" "A moral person?" "Well, a person who lives by some sort of standards, isn't it?" "DOCTOR:" "Yes, but by whose standards?" "Well, I mean, we're all brought up with it." "Church, parents," "the whole world, really." "You can't set yourself against everybody." "You shouldn't, should you?" "Why not?" "Why not?" "All I know is that if I do," "I suffer for it." "What if the things you set yourself against are wrong and you, in fact, are right?" "I suppose it's like Mary said, I'm just too weak." "It's crazy about Peter." "Your writer friend?" "Yeah." "'Cause, see, my mother was quite sensible about it." "How could I possibly go back to a man that I'd had an abortion for?" "I just gave that up." "Although, I believe you never told them who Peter was." "Or, in fact, told him about the child." "Yes, that's right." "So you made the assumption that he wouldn't want it and you gave him no choice in the matter." "In the end I just didn't know what I believed." "It's unlikely he would have wanted it, isn't it?" "What I'm getting at, Kate, is that if you'd told Peter, you'd have known what he felt, one way or the other." "Yes, but my mother is a very shrewd woman, you know." "I'm a bit simple-minded." "I'm not saying your mother's opinion of Peter was wrong, but it was an opinion." "And you knew him and she didn't, but, yet, you took your lead from her." "I'm sorry, I just..." "I just can't go on." "So you'll ask to go back into hospital?" "KATE:" "I'm seeing things again." "DOCTOR:" "What did you see?" "Yesterday evening I went for a walk." "When the thing happens, it has happened once or twice before." "The whole sky suddenly lights up and I think it's nuclear war or something." "I want to scream, but I daren't." "The air goes like glass." "Everything goes very still and quiet." "I daren't scream because I know if I do the whole world will suddenly break up into bits." "It's all over in a few seconds, but I'm standing there shaking and I just want to cling to somebody." "There's nobody there." "I can't go on." "That's a perfectly sane and viable idea because it expresses something that you feel." "The air doesn't go like glass and the world, it won't fall into pieces if I scream, so..." "To have these sort of feelings and thoughts, it means that I'm abnormal, don't you see that?" "I can't expect people to accept me any other way." "Please leave me alone." "You feel then..." "You feel, Kate, that..." "How can I put it?" "That you're not entitled to be yourself, is that it?" "Yes, because..." "Look, if I am myself, it leads me straight back into the hospital." "Don't you see that?" "I see." "(SIGHS)" "Please leave me alone." "DOCTOR:" "When it was decided that Kate should go back into hospital, it wasn't possible for me to continue my research into the causes of her unhappiness." "Come along, Katie." "KATE:" "You want in here, don't you?" "Katie." "What, Dad?" "It's you that wants to be in here, isn't it?" "Didn't you say so?" "Yes." "Where you'll be safe and looked after." "That's what I said." "Well, you'll be better in no time." "KATE:" "Safe and looked after, that's what I want." "To be in the hospital." "I could pass through this, you know." "It isn't really solid." "I could just swim through it, like a goldfish in a tank." "MRS WINTER:" "Come on, Katie, there's a good girl." "Come on." "We didn't want you to come." "I pride myself in knowing how to look after me own daughter." "You're a free girl, Katie, you can turn around and go back home this minute." "Mother, you do look peculiar." "I do?" "You're just like somebody I've never seen before." "Well, you've seen me many times before." "Dad?" "What?" "Who is she?" "Aw, Katie." "Now you know very well who it is." "It's your mother." "Oh." "KATE:" "Whoever she is, her bottom's spreading." "Ugly." "Oh, I think it's really ugly." "Fancies herself and all." "Look at that fat arse on her." "KATE:" "We didn't bring my bag." "I've got it, love." "There it is." "I've put in everything you need, all you need." "Anything more you want, you've only got to ask." "Put it down, Dad, I'll carry it." "No, I..." "I said I'll carry it, Dad." "Mum, what are you whispering at him for?" "What are you planning between you?" "What are you doing?" "I'm not planning anything, Katie." "It's all in your imagination." "Well then, Kate..." "Yes?" "Just these and a glass of water." "We should want a good sleep, won't we?" "What are they?" "Oh, just something to make you sleep." "Doesn't say what they are, does it?" "Well, that would be one of them long chemical names, now wouldn't it?" "Well, what is it?" "Do you know it?" "Of course I know it." "What is it then?" "Well, it's not your concern really." "I mean..." "Whose concern is it then?" "Oh, is that your dolly?" "Oh, it's a very pretty one, isn't it?" "It was in my bag." "Funny how you grown-up young girls, you must have your dolls, mustn't you?" "I didn't bring it." "I said it was in my bag." "Something to cuddle while the sleeping man comes." "KATE:" "What do you talk in that silly way for?" "NURSE:" "Now we mustn't be rude, must we?" "DOCTOR 1:" "You've come back to us for a little while then, Kate." "I hate the lot of you." "DOCTOR 2:" "Now, Kate, you want to get better, don't you?" "Don't know, I've forgotten." "She tried to get inside me last night, you know." "She tried to get inside me and kill me." "WOMAN:" "Who did?" "Kate." "No, Dolly." "DOCTOR 1:" "Dolly's the mother, yeah?" "DOCTOR 2:" "That's right, sir, the mother, Mrs Winter." "It must have been Kate." "Kate takes after Dolly, Dolly always said there was a lot of Kate in her." "I'm getting fat, you know." "Have you noticed?" "I'm really getting enormous." "I'm putting it on." "Spreading!" "My arse is really getting quite..." "KATE:" "How did she get inside?" "Must have been in those pills, those torpedoes." "Yeah, I've seen that in a film." "They cut through the water and then there's an explosion." "I think it was in some old film, wasn't it?" "Yeah, I think you're right." "She got into my stomach with a knife." "KATE:" "She got into my stomach with a knife." "Now, now, Kate, you'll be well looked after." "You want to go back home, don't you?" "And to work?" "Back to your normal life?" "Your parents?" "What exactly is it that you want out of me?" "Nothing out of you, Kate." "What are you whispering for?" "Why don't you leave me alone?" "DOCTOR 1:" "Now sit down, Kate." "KATE:" "Something about shouting, when was it?" "Hey, put that thing away and listen to me for a change." "She's going out with men and messing about." "I'm not, I'm bloody not." "MRS WINTER:" "And you don't swear at me." "I shan't let somebody have it, that's something I do swear." "What's so wrong with going out with somebody?" "MRS WINTER:" "Nothing wrong with going out with people." "Well, then?" "Nobody's saying anything about that." "It's what you do when you go out." "Do you know you've grown into a loose girl?" "I know what you do when you go out." "I know what you all do!" "But don't come to me when you've got something inside there." "Oh, what if I had, Mother?" "Is sex wrong or something?" "No." "It's right and proper, in its proper place." "And where's that, Mother?" "In marriage, that's where." "In marriage!" "Find a man and get married." "I told you, I haven't been with anybody." "What more do you want?" "(SIGHS) Oh!" "I've told you." "Why does it matter so much to you?" "Why does it mean so much?" "It's my sex, isn't it?" "It's mine, it's not yours." "It's got nothing to do with you." "It's you two with your filthy, dirty little minds..." "Hey!" "Wash your dirty mouth out." "That's enough." "I'm going to walk out of here and pick up a bloody man on the street." "No, you won't!" "Come back here!" "MR WINTER:" "You whore." "You're a bloody little whore, that's what you are." "Well, rest and quiet, you'll need plenty of that." "Dr Garfield will see you on the ward tomorrow." "I've had hundreds of men, you know." "Hundreds." "I've had some very well-known people." "You know, actors and writers." "You ought to watch, you know, she's a whore." "She's wicked." "I can see what she's up to, can't you?" "I think you can, really." "I think if you look right inside, you can see what she's doing, can't you?" "You can have me if you want to, you know." "You can." "Doesn't matter, you see, doesn't make any difference because you can't really have me, can you, because..." "Well, I don't exist, so you can't touch me, you can't really have me." "You know what I mean?" "You can even kill me if you want to." "I'd like that." "I mean, that way, if you kill her, that will leave me, won't it?" "That is, of course, if you want me to exist." "Yes, we want you to exist, Kate." "You know, I don't know what it is to exist." "It's learning to take your place in the world, isn't it?" "Make relationships, marry, have children, have a house of your own, friends, and a life of your own." "These are the things you want, Kate." "We know what you want, we know what's best for you, and we're here to help you." "It all sounds very foreign to me." "It does now, it's bound to." "Until you find yourself, I think." "I'm mad, then?" "You are ill." "You know, when I was talking just now, it was like..." "It's hard to explain, it was like somebody else was talking out of my mouth, you know what I mean?" "I'm outside somewhere, a long way off, standing there hypnotised, listening, and I can't do anything." "I know I'm ill." "DOCTOR 1:" "And you're going to get better." "The only trouble is, when I get better I honestly think I feel worse." "KATE:" "Somewhere far away, foreign, an empty place, maybe one of those long beaches by the sea, there are no people, she walks down the beach." "She walks down the beach." "What am I like?" "From the outside?" "What am I really like?" "'Cause inside there's nothing." "Hello." "KATE:" "Hello." "Cutting this hedge." "Really?" "I was gonna have a cigarette." "Oh, carry on, don't mind me." "Want one?" "No, thanks, I don't smoke." "Wish I didn't." "Well, go on then, I'll try one." "Thanks." "Are you in here?" "Yeah." "Nobody at home stopped me smoking, you know." "All right then, innit?" "Just that it made my mother sneeze and made her eyes water." "I expect that you could in your own room though." "The bedroom?" "Honestly, I don't think I like it very much." "Here, let me nip it out, don't throw it away." "You're in here as well then?" "Yeah, I came in of my own accord." "They brought me in." "I've been sick." "I'm better now though." "What's that feel like?" "Got rid of it all, managed to cut it all out." "You've got to have discipline, haven't you?" "Letting your thoughts run away with you like that." "I think they're good in here." "They bring you back to things." "Back to what things?" "Well, making a go of it." "How?" "You've got to play it their way." "Which way?" "You've gotta keep out of trouble, haven't you?" "And I've always been in it." "They picked me up one night, doing a job." "The others got away." "I was standing there crying." "Me, crying." "Crying me bleeding eyes out." "What for?" "It was nothing." "A few years like that, things like that..." "Well, I went straight." "Then I start going off me nut, end up in here." "I've had the electric shock treatment, you know." "Have you?" "No." "There's nothing to it, don't even know it's happening." "Bit dazed afterwards, the old memory goes off a bit, but they know what they're up to in here." "Nobody outside knows." "Oh, you've got to get rid of all that nonsense, haven't you?" "So, that's it." "I'm better now and I'm off out soon" "I thought when I first came in, it's like being a kid again." "It's like being back home with the old bastards." "But that's missing the point, innit?" "They know you're not a kid." "If you can show to them that you're adult, which you are, if you can show them that, they're on your side." "If you rough it up though, it's away with a few of the old privileges." "I've seen it in the army, you let men get bolshie and bolshie they are." "And then where's it end?" "In the glass house." "None of that nonsense here." "They give you your chance and it's up to you." "KATE:" "Yeah, I know it's up to me." "You finish your gardening?" "Near enough." "Would you like to go for a bit of a walk then?" "Walk?" "What's wrong with that?" "Some of them don't like it." "Who doesn't?" "Staff." "What I'm saying is it makes some of them a bit nervous." "Whatever for?" "It's a bit dodgy, that's all." "We're not doing anything, are we?" "Look, we're their responsibility, look at it like that." "Well, supposing..." "Supposing that we did do something." "Is that what you're after?" "No, it's not, I'm just asking." "Well, it's none of their business, is it?" "Of course it is." "Look, we're in here, aren't we?" "We're in their charge." "You've got a lot to learn." "Mind your feet." "All I'm saying is..." "What I mean to say is..." "You and me, supposing we were attracted, it would be up to us, wouldn't it?" "You and me?" "That's a lot to do with why we're in here." "No, I can't see how it is." "You're an ill person, aren't you?" "Otherwise you wouldn't be in here." "Yes, I suppose I am." "Well, try and see it from their point of view." "You're not fit to be carrying on like when you was outside." "No one's fit to know themselves till they are discharged." "I didn't carry on when I was outside!" "Yeah, well..." "I can see a look in your eye and see..." "What?" "You're fond of me." "You like me, darling?" "No, I just asked you to go for a walk." "That was all." "I'm not promiscuous." "Nothing wrong with asking to go for a walk." "You come along tomorrow about the same time, we'll go for a little walk." "I've a nice cup of tea for you." "KATE:" "What do you want?" "Do we want our tea, then?" "(STAMMERING) What do you want?" "(SIGHS) Sit down, Kate." "It's about Paul Morris." "Oh." "Oh, yes." "He's going out soon, you know." "Yes, yes, I know." "He told me." "Oh!" "You two have struck up quite a little friendship, haven't you?" "KATE:" "Well, no, not really..." "I'm not all that keen on him, you know." "Good, because... (SIGHS)" "Well, it's not quite the right thing to be doing, you know." "Isn't it?" "You know it isn't." "You sound just like my mother." "Well, I think that's something I needn't be ashamed of." "They're coming to see you, aren't they?" "Tomorrow, is it?" "Yes, yes, that's right." "Tomorrow." "And I don't want you taken advantage of." "I know what I'm doing, you know." "Oh, I didn't say you didn't..." "I can take care of myself..." "Of course you can." "But for the time being..." "I mean, am I misbehaving or something?" "Well..." "Shall we say a little self-willed?" "A bit thoughtless, no more than that." "Oh, I see." "So, is that what it is?" "You see, Kate, in hospitals, well..." "Well, you and Paul, I don't think it's quite suitable." "I've heard that, not that it means anything serious, but I've heard your little walks upset Paul." "Do you follow what I mean, Kate?" "No, I'm sorry, I don't." "Well, he's not been so good, since, well, you know, since you got pally." "Why?" "What have I done?" "You haven't done anything." "I'm not saying it's you." "It's just, well..." "He might be anxious about you." "You think I've made him unwell again or something?" "But of course not, you silly girl." "What on earth would put such an idea into your head?" "No, no, no." "It's just that..." "He might be" "embarrassed." "Well, what have I done, then?" "You haven't done anything." "It's just these walks and talks that perhaps upset him a little when he's going out of here, you see." "Tell me..." "Have I been worse?" "Well, you haven't been too well, lately, dear." "Oh, you've been very good and taking your pills, but, we do have to be a little careful, don't we, when we're not feeling too good?" "But I don't feel too bad." "I mean, at the moment, I feel quite well." "I don't feel too bad." "(SIGHS)" "You think you know better than the doctors and the rest of us?" "No, no." "Of course not." "There." "I knew you'd see how it was." "You're a bright girl." "(THUDDING)" "WOMAN:" "Nurse." "There, now, Kate." "Get off!" "Hold tight." "Hold tight." "There you are." "Easy, now." "Easy, now." "All right." "Hold on." "Relax." "All right." "Good girl." "There, that's better, isn't it?" "I don't want to be in bed." "Well, we can't have you up if you're going to create such a fuss, can we?" "I haven't created any fuss." "What was all that then, with the chair?" "Now we're going to give you something to let you have a nice sleep." "There, now." "There." "You'll feel much better when you've had a nice rest, Katie." "I don't know what to make of it, Katie." "I really don't." "You know that nurse, love, she was really put out and I don't blame her." "But, anyway, there you are." "Now look, Katie love, have you been right all these years or have we?" "I don't know." ""I don't know"?" "She doesn't know." "Hitting the staff with a chair." "Now, look, you said you knew what you were doing at the time." "It isn't as though you were ill just for a minute now, is it?" "I said I wasn't attacking anybody." "And then, there's this boy." "What's going on there?" "Nothing." "Nothing?" "It's nothing that ends up with you going wild." "I didn't go wild." "What else is it, Katie?" "We've heard their story, and we've heard yours." "You admitted picking up the chair." "Nobody's lying." "You know, I think, really think, that you get things twisted, all jumbled up in your mind, afterwards." "But you're giving trouble to all these people..." "You see, Katie love, now, look at it like this, it's you, Katie, you do as you like, you go your own way, but it's us, your father and your mother" "who have to suffer the consequences for it." "You know, love, I hardly dare look that nurse in the face." "MRS WINTER:" "We're not getting at you, Katie." "MR WINTER:" "No, because if you go on like this, love, and after all, they are trying to help you." "Well, they'll keep you in here forever." "KATE:" "I sometimes think, if they, if I cooperate with them," "I mean, that's how I'll end up in here forever." "It's that nurse, she's always dominating me, she's always getting at me." "Always trying to put me down..." "Listen, darling." "Is it wrong to give you a bit of advice and guidance?" "She just doesn't like me, that's all." "She just persecutes me all the time." "Now, why should she do that, eh, love?" "You see, they're put here, they're trained, Katie." "Do you see that, love?" "They're trained." "I mean, there's doctors here, they've spent years." "Now, the thing with you, you know, having your trouble, the way to look at it is as though it's just an ordinary physical disease in the body." "Do you see, love?" "I mean, any other way of seeing it is old-fashioned." "And all these old-fashioned ideas, they're all going out with..." "Well, today, you see we've got books and television programmes, and there isn't that stigma, is there, Mother, with it, really?" "No, there isn't, love." "That is the nice thing about it." "It's, um..." "It's just as though you've got a broken arm." "Well, that's what I've heard said anyway." "Nothing to be ashamed of." "But I'm not ashamed." "Now, look, I didn't say that you were, love." "But if you were, well, it would be quite understandable." "With the ignorance that's about these days..." "People who just don't want to know anything about it or couldn't care less, or can't face up to things." "You know, that sort of mentality." "(MRS WINTER MUTTERING)" "Now, if on the other hand, you get the nurses, who've been trained, who can look at you from the outside, who can see you as you can't see yourself, well, that, you see, is what they call professional." "And for you to talk about her persecuting you..." "I hope you didn't actually say that to her face, did you?" "Because if you did, love, I mean, she'd hold it against you, won't she?" "Dad, will you just..." "Will you just ask her?" "Did she try to stop me seeing Paul?" "MRS WINTER:" "That's all right, love, we know all about it." "Did she say that I shouldn't see him?" "MRS WINTER:" "What else could she do, love?" "What would happen if they had this on their hands at every first turn." "MR WINTER:" "Do you not see her point of view, love?" "Haven't I got a point of view?" "MR WINTER:" "Of course you have." "Have we ever denied it?" "Have we ever tried to take it away from you?" "KATE: (SOBBING) Don't want to hear anything, see anything..." "Now, look, just don't upset yourself, Katie." "Well, they've got their..." "They've got these wires in here they go right inside my head and right into my brain." "There's this great big machine at the centre of the earth and it controls everybody, it controls you and me and her..." "All of us!" "I can hear it, can't you hear it throbbing?" "MR WINTER:" "There's no machine." "It's a war machine." "Look at my hands." "MR WINTER:" "I'm telling you, love, there's no machine... (CRYING) They'll kill me!" "MR WINTER:" "Nobody's going to kill you, love." "You're all right, you're going to be quite all right." "If you'd only give it time." "Come along now, Kate." "Come along." "(KATE SOBBING)" "I think we'll be going, Dad." "Say goodbye to Mum and Dad, then." "Goodbye, Katie." "We'll come again soon." "Run along, dear." "I'll be with you in a moment." "I think it would be a very good idea... (WHISPERING)" "(KATE PANTING)" "Not going out this morning, Kate?" "No, I don't feel like it." "No." "You had a good night, didn't you?" "Yes, thanks." "Yes." "Such nice people, your parents." "I think we were a bit naughty with them, weren't we?" "After they'd come all this way to see you. (CLICKS TONGUE)" "And then to go making your mother..." "Well, you remember, don't you?" "It's simply a matter of not losing our temper." "Isn't it?" "MRS WINTER:" "It isn't the way I'd go on, you see?" "Not at all." "I have to call it badness." "I have to say, this matter of sex, you have to be careful and obtain a man's respect." "You give them what they want, and there's no respect." "And no future." "You're no better than a prostitute." "And one thing leads to another." "Now, you can't say about what you've learnt." "Nothing that's good and right from me and your father." "And that's what you've got to go by." "I hardly recognise you sometimes." "You're a disappointment." "And this with men, it's dirty, it's filthy." "And until you learn some self-control..." "MR WINTER:" "I love you." "I have since you were little." "And I've tried." "I think I can say that I've been a good father." "And what have you done?" "You've pushed it all back in me face." "Because you're self-willed." "Your mother and me..." "I mean, she's a good woman." "And I can't stand to see the effect of what you are doing..." "What you do to her." "Undermining her health." "I'm ashamed of you." "I just can't put me mind to think of what you're doing and how you're behaving." "If she has a breakdown or anything, it'll be on your conscience, my girl." "We're not in this world to do as we like." "I don't care how free..." "You see, Kate..." "You'll find that freedom" "doesn't come from self-indulgence." "But it's doing what is right, and what you owe people." "You can't live as if you're the only one breathing." "Now can you, girl?" "So what we're trying to do in this hospital is to help you to help yourself." "That's what we're here for." "There's no one to push you about or regiment you, give you orders." "Nobody here to make you do anything you don't want to, Kate." "You do realise that?" "Everything has its purpose." "And I think we know what that purpose is." "In the end, it's for you to walk out through those gates and never come back." "Isn't it?" "DOCTOR:" "Good morning, Kate." "How are you this morning?" "No." "Kate, you're not very well?" "I haven't..." "(STAMMERING) Really, I haven't..." "Yeah, I will." "I'll let you." "You can." "Anything, I..." "Morning." "I can "Good morning"." "Listen." ""Good morning."" "I can..." "Well, there you are, you see?" "In many ways a fairly typical case history." "Happy and sociable till her late teens." "Then, in and out of various jobs for a while." "Reputation for inefficiency, bad temper, rudeness." "Often alienated from the people she was working with through the notion that they were, somehow, plotting against her, or disliked her, or tried to make a fool of her." "And she was out of work for a time, and the parents noticed some improvement." "From all accounts she became childish and tractable." "The mother seems to think that this was one of Kate's well periods." "Eventually, she worked again." "Then, an unfortunate series of affairs, culminating in a pregnancy which was terminated at 11 weeks." "The case notes here include, thought-blocking, over-inclusion, emotional apathy, automatic obedience." "She was in seclusion for a time and gained a reputation for smashing in states of catatonic excitement." "There were delusions of persecution." "For example, that her mother was killing her, had killed her aborted child, that she was under the control of some all-powerful cosmic machine." "The family history is negative and there's no detectable relationship between her various symptoms and her environment." "Notice the posture, the occasional grimaces, the tendency to mumble things to herself." "Well, I think the clinical picture is a very clear one." "And the present state of the patient, what one might call a logical expectation, given the case history." "Now, uh, diagnosis?" "STUDENT 1:" "Paranoia." "DOCTOR:" "Paranoia." "What treatment would you suggest?" "STUDENT 1:" "Um, that's a good question." "(STUDENTS LAUGH)" "Well, let's have another diagnosis while you're thinking." "Another?" "(STUDENT SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)" "DOCTOR:" "I beg your pardon?" "This is probably chronic schizophrenia." "Isn't it, sir?" "Yes, now what treatment?" "With drugs, um..." "What drugs?" "Largactil." "Three times a day, orally." "DOCTOR:" "Yes, any other treatment suggest itself?" "What about ECT?" "I beg your pardon?" "What about ECT?" "ECT, yes." "Can you tell me if electric shock treatment does any more than simply shake the patient up?" "DOCTOR:" "That patient completely anaesthetised, see?" "And feels nothing." "Afterwards, some temporary loss of memory." "Now, something between the teeth, that's to stop dislocation of the jaw." "Notice how the electrodes are placed." "NURSE:" "Okay." "DOCTOR:" "Stand back." "If I don't get an interview for this" "I should think I'm using the wrong toothpaste." "I'm pulling all the strings, aren't I?" "NURSE:" "It'd be a nice one to get, sure." "DOCTOR:" "Of course, we don't know how it works." "All we know is that is does work." "Quite remarkably." "You know how this treatment originated?" "Yes, yes, it was pigs." "More or less an accident, really." "Naples, I think." "Oh, my God, if we waited until we found out why these things work, we'd be waiting a long time." "What are the chances of her committing suicide in the future?" "Do you think, sir, ultimately, this girl may have to have a brain operation for this condition?" "Perhaps the abortion played some part in worsening her condition." "Do you think the fact that she was associating with friends that her parents regarded as undesirable has any bearing on the development of the disease?" "Is there any hope for this girl's recovery?" "What advice would you give about her employment in the future?" "Do you feel she could be a danger to the public upon leaving hospital?" "In any way?" "What is there left after all..." "After all the forms of treatment have failed?" "Would you say, at the moment, the outlook is not very good for her?" "Do I understand that you don't think her family background played any part in her illness at all?" "What, in fact, do you know about this family, besides the one or two interviews with her mother?" "With due respect, sir, you seem to be studiously avoiding any, um, environmental factors." "You seem to have had a lot of them brought up, um..." "Strained relationships with her mother, associating with undesirable friends, her sister leaving home, and so on." "And you seem to be studiously avoiding saying that the disease is something almost by itself." "Surely, both before, as the cause of her illness, and after, as her means of treatment, one's got to take into account her home background."