"No, no, no." "A thousand times no." "Do not be such a stick in the mud." "Where's your sense of adventure?" "Are you deaf, do you not understand?" "No, n-o." "Forget it." "End of discussion." "Fleischman, please it is my grammy's 80th birthday." "It's just two days, all expenses paid, won't cost you a dime." "You know, you're unbelievable," "All this trouble just not to face your family without a boyfriend?" "Great Middle Eastern food in Detroit, lamb kebab, babaganoush, tabbouleh." "What happened to Mike?" "Doesn't want to miss his bean harvest or a Detroit didn't light his lamp?" "You know he can't survive the sealed environment of an airplane." " The monoxides there would kill him." " O'Connell, I am not going." "If it was Hawaii, in Hong Kong, London, maybe I'd do you a favor." "But Detroit?" "What do they call it?" "Cleveland without the glitter?" "There is nothing you could say to make me spend a weekend in Detroit." "Are you sure, Fleischman?" " What are those?" " Tickets." " To what?" " Pistons." "Pistons tickets?" "Detroit Pistons tickets?" "No." "Nice try though." "Let's see what it says here." ""Detroit Pistons vs. New York Knickerbockers. "" "The Knicks?" "You got Knicks Pistons tickets?" "Floor seats, center court." "Let me see these." "Let me see 'em." "Where did you get these?" "Floor seats." "Knicks-Pistons, center court." "Boat leaves Saturday morning." "Don't forget your toothbrush." "NORTHERN EXPOSURE 4x14 "GROSSE POINT 48230" Subtitles subXpacio" "No mother." "It's fine not to meet us." "No, I'm not just saying that." "We need a car anyway." "What?" "Airbags?" "We'll get a car with airbags." "Who, the MacCaffrey sisters?" "Reverend Harding, yeah." "This really isn't the time to go over the guest list." "Yes." "Blue table cloth." "I think we're getting a bad connection." "See you." "Bye." "What am I doing?" "Why?" "Why do I think every time I go home it's gonna be different?" "I don't know why Jersey let Mason go to the Knicks." "He's a jewel." "He starts tonight with Ewin." "They'll be a wall around the paint." "It'll be worth it to see my grammy." "She is gonna be 80 years old." "She's really sweet." "I love her." "She used to let me stay up late and play gin rummy." "I've had good seat before." "I saw the NCAA regionals from 2nd row, but never on the floor." "You'll have to towel Pat Ewin's sweat off my face." "You know, it's just my mother." "She's relentless." "She's a perpetual motion emotional machine." "She just doesn't let up." "Then of course there's Jeffey." " Mr. Trickle down economics." " Your brother?" "I forgot." "You'll probably like him." "Let's put this in perspective, whatever happens with kith or kin, you'll have one hell of a seminal basketball experience." "I just wish I had a normal family." "I don't know." "Gary Trudeau." "Yeah." "Him and Jane Pauley." "There is a nice family." "Don't flatter yourself." "Your family is not crazier than any other." "What would you say to a father who at 58 years old quits his job and buys a buffalo ranch in South Dakota?" "I'd say I wouldn't be surprised if he had a daughter who was in Alaska." "Fine, Fleischman." "Psychologically, separation is part of becoming a healthy adult." "Eventually we all grow up and realize we're all loony in our own unique and individualized way." "Maybe you're right." "Shall we get this show on the road?" " Yeah." " Great." "I'll grab this." "Okay." " I like it." " Fleischman." "I do." "These people are clearly comfortable living in the upper tenth of 1%." " Is this yours here?" " Yeah." "It's nice." "That one's nice too." "Yeah." "That's the Benetts." "Kellys across the street." "That colonial is the Greens." " Where would the Greenbergs be?" " Greenbergs?" " Yeah." " I don't remember any Greenbergs." " What?" " No Greenberg, no Greenblat." " I bet there's no Jew in 10 miles." " That's not true." "We have Jews." " Name one." " Debbie Ellis was Jewish." "Ellis?" "That's not a Jewish name." "She was Jewish, I'm sure Her father or somebody." "Besides..." " What?" " She was smart and funny." "Hello?" "Maggie." " Hi." " Hi." " You made it." " Yes." "You look great, don't know what Mom's on about." "I love your hair." "It's so cute." "Dr. Joel Fleischman." "My sister in law, Stephie." " Hi." " Hi." "So what's going on?" "Where's grammy?" " Upstairs." " Upstairs?" "Your Mom is upstairs too." "Stephie, here's you pocketbook." "I can't find a kleenex." " Hey." " Hey." "Hey squirrel face." " Long time no see." " Yeah." "This is Dr. Joel Fleischman." "Jeffey O'Connell, my brother." " Hi." "How are you?" " Jeffey." " Jeffey." " Mom and grammy are upstairs?" "Yeah, for hours now." " She's alright isn't she?" " Oh yeah." "Nothing a straight jacket and the booby hatch wouldn't fix." " Mom!" "Any progress?" " Not on wit." "Mary Margaret." "Hey, mother." "I'm so glad your here." "Did you remember to take Oak Grove?" " Mills Road has been out for six months." " Yes mother." "What's going on?" "Grandmother's locked herself in the bathroom, of all days to do it." "Joel, so glad to see you could make it." " Let's put these away." " I'll get these." " Mother." " Yes." "Mother." "Grammy locked herself in the bathroom?" " Why did she do that?" " It's beyond me." "Everybody came." "She was in there and she wouldn't come out." "I've been up and down three times." "I'm out of ideas." "Why don't you take a crack at her?" "Come on." "Grammy?" "Grammy what's going on?" "Are you okay?" " Who is it?" " It's me, Mary Margaret." " Is that you, Mary Margaret?" " Yeah." "It's me." " What are you doing here?" " It was supposed to be a surprised." " Are you coming down soon?" " No." " Can I come in?" " Are you alone?" "Jane, take all your busy bees and clear out of here, or I'll open all the faucets and flood this house, you hear?" "Yes, mother." "Old battle axe." "Grammy they're gone." "It's just me." "Okay." "Come in." "Quick." "She would call the fired dept." "Like I was a cat up a tree." "Grammy, what's going on?" "Are you okay?" " I need a match." "You have one?" " A match?" "No." "Grammy, everybody's downstairs." " Don't you want to go downstairs?" " No." "You go ahead." "I don't want to." " Are you okay?" " I'm fine dear." "I just..." "I don't know." "I came in here to do my hair and I simply didn't feel like going." "Maybe I couldn't face the thought of another honey ham." "You look pretty grammy, you really do." "Look what I found in the cabinet, an old bottle of lilac water." "What was it doing there?" "Who uses it anymore?" " I don't know." "Always been there." " My mother would slop it all over." "It's turned." "Pretty bottle." "Want it?" " No, I don't think so." " Me neither." "Do me a favor?" "I have some matches under my pillow." "Matches under your pillow?" "I smoke at night when everyone's sleeping." "Would you get 'em?" "You know smoking's bad for you." "I'm 80, what could happen?" "Okay." "I'll get you an ashtray too." "How did you meet Mary Magaret?" "Well you know, in a town of 849 people I couldn't not meet her." "Isn't that interesting?" "I take it you're not a snowshoe, dogsled cooks like my sis'." "Not me." "I'm fulfilling a contractual obligation to the State of Alaska." "There's a dispute over the length of service." "I don't get it." "What exactly, is she doing up there?" "This plane flying thing?" "Is it an Amelia Earhart complex?" "Deviled egg?" "They're yummy." "Joel?" " No, thanks." " Take a look around here." "Please, what do you think is so wrong with this place?" "Streets too clean, not enough junk cars on lawns?" "It's time little Mary Margaret turned in her Eurail pass and took her place in the carpool." "Why would you say that?" "I think she's brave to set off on her own." " I'm very proud of her." " Brave?" "Everybody knows it's the loose screws that leave home." "The malcontents, the misfires, the square pegs." "I'll get it." "Am I wrong Joel?" " Well..." " Excuse me." " Fleischman, is that German?" " Yeah." "Yiddish German." "You know, Reverend Harding's father was our pastor for 42 years until he passed on last year." "Dwight went into the family business." "Joel, get over her." "I want you to meet a friend of the family." "Jed Fleming, this is Dr. Joel Fleischman." " How do you do?" " Good." "How you doing?" "He's my sister's new hedge against inflation." " Dragged him all the way from Alaska." " Is that right?" "I didn't know she was bringing somebody." " Cold one for you?" " Thanks." "Sorry, I'm late." "I was putting a new hull on the Fortune Five." " It's a 48 footer, three masts." " Nice." " Deviled eggs?" " Definitely, thanks." " Sure?" " Yeah." " There you go." " Thanks." " Where's Maggie?" " Good question." "Yeah." "He was a lot of fun." "Was he a keeper?" "Rick?" "A keeper?" "If he hadn't been smushed by that satellite, were there marriage plans on the horizon?" "Marriage with Rick?" " It's not so uncommon, is it?" " I guess not." " We talked, but it was just talk." " What kind of talk is that?" "Big wedding, small wedding, how many kids, that sort of thing." "But it was never really serious." "I never got a ring." " I'm sorry." " Really, I didn't care." " Why not?" " Well," "I cared..." "I just didn't care care." "Besides, at his funeral this other girlfriend shows up." "Then I find out he had a different one for each day of the week." "Even before that I didn't care really." "About marriage..." "Well at least to him." "Good for you." "Mother." "This is it." "Jane, do you have wax in your ears?" "I told you to go away." "Mother this has gone on long enough." "I'm putting the ham on the table and we are doing the cake in five minutes." "She's bluffing." "She's planning to eat at 4:00." "I am not kidding." "Mary Margaret?" "Are you still in there?" " Yes, Mother." " Good." "You get your grandmother downstairs right now or I'll..." "I don't know what I'll do but this is not very nice." "Jane, I said go away, leave me alone, scram, scat." "That is just incredibly rude." "I think that did it." "I'm almost out." " Maybe I should smooth her feathers." " She always made me guilty too." " Mother?" " Don't be surprised, she's been pulling that ever since she was a girl." "Poor Jane, always getting the fuzzy end of the lolly pop." " Passive-aggressive." " That what they call it?" " Can I have a puff?" " Don't hotbox it." " We know one thing for sure." " What's that?" "We won't run out of mayonnaise." "Tell me something." "What don't you guys put this stuff on?" " You'd think it was mortar." " I guess." "Joel, can I ask you a personal question?" "465 a month after taxes, not married and two years since I had sex." "You said personal." " I had a different sort." " Shoot." "Okay, it seems to me, and correct me if I'm wrong, the practice of Judaism is of ethical behavior." "You follow the law." "There's no thought of eternal reward." "Eternal reward?" "You mean like heaven?" "Right." "Don't get me wrong, I like goodness for its own sake, but on the other hand, doesn't it gnaw at you, the thought that there's no afterlife?" "That this is it." "Even if that were true, how do you live with that?" "You know, I'll tell you Reverend, speaking for myself, not as for the entire Jewish faith, because it's impossible." "When did you hear 10 Jews agree on anything?" "Except maybe Israel, but for me Reverend, the fact that when we die we are nothing more than worm meat," "I just don't think about it." "Good." "Everyone's helping themselves." " Mother won't come down." " Excuse me, Mrs. O'Connell, is there a phone I can use?" "I want to check the tip-off time." " Right through that door." " Great." "Thank you." " I was told I could use the phone." " Please." "Go ahead." "Don't mind me." " You alright?" " Yes." " I just hate him so much." " Who?" " Jeffey." " Oh." "You know what he said today?" "You wouldn't cry if you had a job." "He told me he did not want me to work." "I would have worked." "I know I cry a lot, I know that." " But I didn't used to." " Can I get you something?" "Water?" "I'm leaving him tomorrow, but don't tell anyone." " You promise?" " Okay." " Because nobody knows." " Okay." "So you can't tell anyone." "Okay?" "Who would I tell?" "But..." "You know what?" "I'll bet there's another phone in another room." "I'll leave you alone." "That's great." "Oh God." " What did Dr. Swaney say?" " I didn't go." "They can do incredible things now." "They can put in a whole new knee." "When would it stop?" "My knee, my hip, my heart?" "I'm 80 years old." "Of course my cartilage is wearing out." "My important organs just keep chugging along." " What do you think of this watch?" " Your engagement watch." " It's beautiful." " Here, take it." " No, no, grammy it was..." " Take it." " I can't take this." " I never liked it." "Pink gold." "I wanted yellow gold Nobody wore pink gold." "I don't know what he was thinking." "See?" "It's the wrong tone for my skin." " All he had to do is look." " You could have exchanged it." "I didn't want to hurt his feelings." "The ironic thing is everything is pink gold today everywhere, not yellow gold, pink gold." "Are you thirsty?" "I could use a drink." " You want to go down not?" " Do you?" "No." "Everybody I want to see is dead." "First the men one by one, now even the widows are dying off." "I'm the only one here." "I don't even know what I'm doing." " Grammy." " But I'm so glad you're here." "Your poor grandfather." "He would have gotten such a kick out of you." "Where the hell is Stephie?" "Typical, told Mom she'd help, now who's fixing the ice and filling the drinks?" "I'm sick of her episodes." "What kind of medicine do you do?" " General Practice." " Smart, hit the ground running." "Don't have to waste all those extra years sub specializing." "Actually I did a sub in pulmonary diseases." " Pulmonary?" " Lungs." "You know asthma, emphysema, everything related to that." " Yeah." " What do you do?" " Stocks, I have a little brokerage." " Little?" "Jed's got 20 guys in the bullpen." "Hasn't done me any harm." "We got a lot of doctors for clients." "If you want a portfolio call me." "Okay." "Thanks." "I used to date Maggie." "Did you know that?" "No." "I didn't know that." "Summer of '86, pretty heavy thing." "There's a step at the bottom." " She never mentioned it." " No?" "Girl's a regular water rat." "Fearless sailor." "She gets her hand on that tiller you can't pry it off." "You sail?" "No." "I row." "Oh damn it." "Let me help you there." "What is so hard about fixing an ice maker?" "My mom has enough time for 16 divorce seminaries, but can't call a repair man." "Come down to the marina tomorrow." "I'll show you the boat, take you out." "We can't." "We got an early flight." "Let's go by the club later for a drink, after the candles." " They got a good jazz band." " We got tickets to the Pistons." "Lot of macaroni salad today, must be the chopped pickles." " No way." "It's the mayo." " How's that coming?" "I'm sorry it was cranberry juice." "Try a little of this." "Here." "You're doing the ice!" "You and Stephie are my rocks of Gibraltar." " Bring out the ice, would you?" " Okay." "And don't let the Reverend sit out by himself too long." " So Joel, you're basketball fan." " Big-time." " Ground ball, that's my game." " Is that right?" " Yeah." " You play or just like to watch." " No, I play." " It's getting kind of slow here." "They got a board out back." "It'd be kind of fun to shoot some?" " Oh?" " What am I talking about?" " You're probably beat." " No." "I feel alright" " Yeah?" " Yeah." " Good." "I'll see you courtside." " Great." " Jeffey?" " What do you say Jeffey?" " No." "You go ahead." "Mom needs me." " You sure?" "Yeah." "The ball's in the basket there." "You got any sneaks Joel?" "Yeah actually, I do." "Watch out." "He's murder on the paint." " Hi sis'." " Jeffey." "Hey, Fleischman." " It's about time." " Cigarettes." "Where have you been?" "Did you get her down yet?" "No." "She doesn't want to come down." "You gotta get her down." "Let's get this show on the road." "Cake and ice-cream, blow out the candles." " We have three hours to tip-off." " You know, it's so amazing." "I've always thought of my grammy as just my grammy, but now I'm knowing her as this fellow person, as a woman." "That's just peachy." "I'm thrilled for you and your grammy." "But you've abandoned me in a house full of strangers with an ex." " Ex boyfriend?" " Yeah." "Jed." "Jed!" "Everybody wanted me to marry Jed." " What?" " So that's why he wants to kill me." " What are you raving about now?" " Jeds still carries a torch for you." "Don't be ridiculous." "Scotch, bourbon, glasses, ice." "Be a big boy, have a good time." "Wait." "Get back here." "two hours, we're out of here." "Grammy's thirsty." "Have a nice game." " Straight up or rebound out?" " Straight up's fine." " Sure?" "I got a few inches on you." " Straight up's fine." "I'm impressed." "Left handed." "How'd you pick it up." " My Aunt Ruth when I was 12." " Your Aunt Ruth?" "She took me to a Van Cliburn concert." "I don't know what the program was, Schubert or Rachmaninov." "I had a hard time staying awake, but she kept poking me and saying his left's as good as his right." "Want to play with the big boys, you got to have a good left." "Oh yeah." "Hi, Stephie." "Do you mind if I get a glass of water?" "Sure." " Everyone is having a good time." " I'm leaving Jeffey." "Our marriage is over." "Never should have married but what was I supposed to do..." "There I was, 20 year old psych major." "I wasn't serious about a career." "I was in college to find a husband." "That's what I was brought up to do." " I tried to be a good wife." " I'm sure you did." "Six years." "What do I have to show for it?" "We don't even have a child." "He said a baby would ruin my figure." "My breasts would fall." "As if he'd even notice." "I have a body you could break bricks on." "My waste are as flat as a skillet." "My breasts float and what do I do?" "I take courses." "Thai cooking, photography, folk dancing." "It'd be funny if it wasn't so pathetic." " Are you okay?" " Yes." "Please." "You're color's not very good." "No?" "Excuse me, I just have to get my shawl." "Is everything alright?" "Fine." "We're just having a talk." "Good." "The boys are having a fun game of basketball." "Don't miss it." "You look a little flushed there, Fleischman." "I'd be better if you weren't all over me like a cheap suit." " You didn't think I'd hand it to you." " I wasn't expecting Bill Lambier." " We could call it a day." " Not on your life." " Jeffey." " Yeah, Mom." "Stephie is in the kitchen and her eyes were very red." " She's not near the knives?" " Jeffey." " Lock up all the flammables." " I'm serious, Jeffey." "Serious?" "Why don't you worry about the infrastructure here?" "The garage roof has a hole in it the size of a bowling ball." "These are my hockey skates." "They're ruined." "I'm sorry dear." "Your father took care of that." "You should have thought about that before you served papers." "Somebody had to get off their duff." "There go the Olympics." " Is Maggie still into skinny dips?" " You two skinny dipped?" "I don't want to tell tales out of school." " Can't be much to tell." " How's that?" "All the guys who got lucky are sprouting daisies now." "Get him Fleischman Hit him where it hurts." "You too, Jedster." " Hi, Maggie." "You look great." " Thanks." " We're playing basketball." " Your hair's shorter." " I like it." " You do." "Thanks." "I was thinking letting it grow." "Why don't you come down?" "I'm busy up here now." " Romeo, balcony scene's over." " Save me a few minutes." "Bye, boys." "Have fun." "Look at that." "He's actually having fun." " Who's that dear?" " Fleischman." "Fleischman having fun." "What a concept." "This woman is 50 years old." "She looks 35." "And this one's 53." "She doesn't look a day over 40." " What is that "Lear's"?" " It's Jane's." "When we were 50, we looked 50 and that was that." "Nobody wants to look their age today." "I wonder why now." "It's odd." "I can see those old farts in their convertibles." "Pass me the Sherry, please." " How are your orgasms?" " What?" "It says here, "How are your orgasms on a scale from 1 to 10?"." "What about you Maggie, 1 or 10?" "Me?" "What a question, huh?" "But a big topic, sex." "I knew so many couples that were unhappy that way." "Bill and I used to tell each other how lucky we were." "We were novices when we started." "Well he'd been a round a little, but it just got better and better." "We'd surprise ourselves sometimes." "You'd never think to look at us about the bad things we did that were so good." "Mother, open this door this minute." " God that woman is a pest." " Mother, we're just talking." " Can't you leave us alone?" " You don't have to come out." "But why can't I come in?" "Can I?" "Let me in." "I promise I won't do anything." " Maybe you'd better go." " Really?" "It's the Sherry." "I have to pee dear." "Okay." " Mom, coming out." " Jane, get away from the door." "Hello, Mother." "What is her problem?" "Is it me?" " It is me, isn't it?" " No, Mother." "It's not." "I wouldn't stop to buy lottery tickets." "I don't care what she says." "It's appalling, all those old people lined up throwing their money away on foolish things." " It isn't that or you." " What's going on in there?" "Why is she talking to you not me?" "It is not easy living with her." "With her Rush Limbaugh on the radio and her TV at all hours of the night." "Mother, we're just talking." "About what then?" "Sex." " Sex?" " Sex." "Fine." "The two of you have fun at your party in the bathroom." "I have a house full of guests who need my attention." "Come on." " Afraid to put it up from there?" " Come on." " Come on." " Get out of my way." "What happened?" "Are you alright?" "I don't need to go to the hospital." "It's probably something I ate." " You'll be fine." " I know I'll be fine." " Watch the step." " Mind your valuables, Jed." "When Betty went in for a hysterectomy they stole her pearls." "Can I take these things out of my nose." "He'll be fine, just needs a couple tests." "The important thing is that his pulse is regular and strong." "My guess is angina, maybe a little heart attack but it's possibly not even cardiac." " We don't have to worry." " Poor Jed." " He just said he'd be fine." " It's my fault." "Grown men playing games like boys." "I should have put my foot down." "Don't let them boss you around Jed." "Make 'em give you a private room." "Bye." "Is there anyone you want me to notify?" "Just move my Lexus off the street." "The keys are in the kitchen." " Right." " Here, Jed." "I cut you a big piece of cake." "To bad you'll miss the candles." "We'd have put some ice-cream on it, but we thought it would melt." " Take care dear." " Bye, Jed." "Bye bye, Jed." " Hi." " Hi." "What a day." "I feel so awful." "Reverend, it's the best thing that could have happened to Jed." "I wasn't talking about Jed." "I was talking about me." "I'm just not any good at trauma." " Emotional I mean." " How so?" "People start to talk to me about their personal problems." "I don't want to hear they're cheating on their wives." "I just want to flee." "Well, that would be a handicap in your line of work." "It is." "You should have seen my dad." "He was always at ease with people." "He said I'd get used to ministering." "I just needed to get my feet wet, to get some experience." "I haven't gotten used to it, if anything it's harder." "I remember this guy in my first year of Medical School." "He was a smart guy, nice guy but when the day came for us to pull the sheets back from our cadavers, he just chucked all over his shoes." " But he got used to it?" " No, he never did actually." "I believe he went into Pharmaceuticals." "Yeah, that's it." "Mom's has enough problems with grammy in the can without you getting her all worked up." "One day, just one day, you couldn't turn off the tap." "I'm leaving, Jeffey." "Grammy's got to come out." "She can't sleep in there." "No, I'm leaving you." " I got an apartment." " What do you mean an apartment?" "I got an apartment, two bedrooms, a balcony and I'm moving out." "Where?" "Wait a minute." "You didn't put down a deposit?" "Please, tell me you didn't sign anything." " A lease." " That's great." "Now I have to go to Dan Ashland to get your out of it." "No, I don't want to get out of this apartment." " I want out of this marriage." " Where do you think you'll go?" "Where do you think you'll get a job?" " What car you want?" "Forget the Jeep." " I hate the Jeep." "4 wheel drive in the suburbs?" "We never go anywhere." " This is ridiculous." " Yes it is." "You can't even write a check alone." "You can't get the garage door open." "Remember when you waited all day for me to get home to go get your golf clubs out of the basement because you wouldn't go alone?" "Apartments don't have basements." "Six weeks." "You'll be back." "Hey, Stephie, what's going on?" " Nothing." " Are you okay?" "Am I okay?" "Yes." "I am." " Good." " I'm leaving Jeffey." " You're leaving Jeffey?" " I know he's your brother." " He's just so cold and petty." " Yeah, I know." "Wish grammy happy birthday for me." "Are you ready?" "Let's go." " Stephie is leaving Jeffey." " I heard, but we're late." "That's real sensitive." "My sister in law's walking out on my brother." "I'm torn up about it, but there's nothing we can do." "I don't want to miss this game." "So can we please get going?" "No." "Grammy wants to talk to you." " Grammy?" "She wants to talk to me?" " Yeah." " What could she want to talk about?" " I don't know, but she wants to." "I'm not missing this game." "I didn't come 5.000 miles to be 30 minutes away and then miss the tip-off." "I fulfilled my end, played the part." "I'm not gonna miss this game." "With or without you, I'm going to that game." "Alright, you have two minutes." "It's open." " Hi." " Hello." " You wanted to see me Mrs..." " Stowe." "Come in." "Shut the door." "I think I should tell you if this is about Maggie and I, if she's led you to believe I'm something other than what I am" "I just want to say that I'm a friend." " Not a friend really..." " She says she doesn't fancy you." "She likes the other one, the sickly boy." " Mike?" " Yes." "She says he's very courageous, battling for clean air." "She thinks he's the cat's pajamas." "Why did you want to see me Mrs. Stowe?" " I've never met a Jewish person." " Sorry?" "Bill, that was my husband, he said he met one once in New York." "There's a lot of us in the Big Apple," "Fact is, we're all over the place now." "Well you're not in Grosse Point." "The only Jewish people I've ever seen are on TV comedies." ""Seinfield" and that little know it all on Murphy Brown." " Nice people on Brooklyn Bridge." " Yeah." "It's been really nice, I'm glad I got a chance to meet you," " but I have this basketball game." " I wouldn't worry about it." " The game?" " Mike." "Sit down." "Here, you see..." "When Jane was five, Bill and I separated." "I'd been married young and here I was in my 20's, with a husband and little girl," "I thought I had everything I wanted." "But somehow, my life seemed over." "Maybe I wanted to stir things up." "So I told Bill I thought it'd be a good idea if we got away from each other for a while." "I sent him away and went out with other men." "There was that tall Ralph Hendley, with beautiful white teeth." "He was very nice." "But I missed Bill and his smell so I asked him back." "He did come and that was that." "Jane once said that she remembered when she was very young when her father wasn't living with us." "I told her it was just a dream." "She would have held it against me." " ¿Fleischman, grammy?" " What?" " It's time." " For what?" " Basketball game?" " It's alright." " I'm ready to go now." " You are?" "Okay." " Everybody seems to have enjoyed it." " Yeah." "It's a mess." "Chocolate." "Hello, everyone." " Reverend Harding." " Happy Birthday." "I wrote a little homily, just for the occasion, it's..." " I must have left it somewhere." " It's alright, Dwight." "Hello, girls, how are the Abyssinians?" " Delilah had a litter of seven." " There were eight but we lost one." "I'm sorry to hear that." "Jeffey, why the sourpuss?" "Stephie left Jeffey." " Stephie left Jeffey?" " She forgot her mittens." "Remind me to send her a thank you note." "Jane." "The Pattersons and the Reeds got tired of waiting and left." " Let's not do that." " I was so embarrassed.." "I hope you're satisfied." "Well, here we all are." "It's so nice of you to come." "Let's go in and open my presents." "Come on." " Happy Birthday, grammy." " Thank you darling." " What?" " I think I owe you an apology." " How's that?" " Well, when you said your family was crazy and I went on about separation." " Vintage, Fleischman." " No, it's a sound construct, but in your case, I think I recant." "I mean, you're right, you got yourself a regular loony bin, it's absolutely incredible you survived." "I don't know." "You must be made of something." "Thanks, Fleischman." "Let's go." "Happy Birthday to you." "Happy Birthday, dear Mother" "Happy Birthday to you." "Ripped by subXpacio and TusSeries"