"Gentlemen, we are here to do homage... to one who has filled the bottle of achievement... one who rose to the top... uh, just like our cream." "This man has faithfully delivered our products... achieving a record for which we may all be justly proud... the unbelievable record of 428 points." "Mr. Levinson, I congratulate you." "Thank you." "And now, fellas, I..." "Uh..." "Mr. Levinson thanks you, I'm sure." "And there are others among you... who are deserving of honorable mention." "You, Mr. Ackerman, for your splendid record of 397 points." "But there is another man... who has been with us but a short time... but in that short time has achieved a wonderful record." "I congratulate you, Mr. Snodgrass." "And you, Mr. Scott, are deserving of honorable mention." "And you." "And you." "And you." "And..." "I'll see you later." "Now, just a moment's chat about the pulse of our public..." "Now, in this area here, we find..." "In this area here, we find that our sales..." "I say, in this area... our sales are falling far below what they should." "There is no reason..." "Please." "Please." "We find in this area here that our business is falling off... while that of our competitors seems to on the increase..." "As I was saying, that in this area..." "In this area, I'm telling you... that we find our shares are falling below what they should." "We are losing all our customers!" "Now, something is wrong!" "Now the question is, what is wrong?" "Why is it, I ask you?" "There's the reason!" "I can see it now." "That's what's wrong!" "Burleigh, what's the matter with you?" "I just drank some ink." "You know how that is." "No, I don't." "I never drink ink." "Some of the boys been playing tricks on you?" " Who gave you that?" " Oh, no one gave it to me, sir." "Well, probably that clown... who's been doing the hiccoughing in there." " Oh, no, sir?" " How do you know?" "Get in there." "Harvest Moon, checkroom." "Hello, sis?" "You all ready to go?" "Mm-hmm." "Yeah, I'm leaving right away." "All right, I'll be waiting out in front." "I think it's terrible... little girl waiting out in front." "Heh." "Me, too." "Yes, Burleigh." "Uh-huh." "Well, I'll be there anytime you say." " So will I." " Heh." "Me, too." "Don't worry." "I'll be there." "I think the guy ought to stay home." "Me, too." "Good-bye." "You know, I'm glad you're through... 'cause I was gettin' a little tired." "Heh heh..." "Yes, I know... you, too." "Ha ha ha ha ha!" "Ha ha ha ha ha ha!" "Pardon me." "You gave us the wrong hats." "Ohh, that's very funny." "If you tell me where the act's playing..." "I'll try and miss it." "Ha ha ha." "Yeah." "We like you." "We don't." "Listen, what happened?" "Did you lose your address book?" "Yes." " Yes, what?" " Yes, ma'am." "Hmm." "That's what I thought." "Good night." "Where you going?" "You give me my hat." "Heh heh." "Give me my hat." "Listen, I've got a great idea." "Let's all go over to your house." "Did it ever occur to you that I might be somebody's sister?" "Hello, sis." "Listen, I'm warning you!" "My brother's a very tough man." "She's got a brother" "She's got a brother, she's got a brother" "Burleigh!" "All fall down" "Burleigh!" "Burleigh!" " Burleigh!" "Burleigh!" " Burleigh!" "Burleigh!" " Burleigh!" " Burleigh!" "Burleigh!" "Burleigh!" " Burleigh!" " Burleigh!" "What's happening?" "What's the matter?" "Say, you fellas can't do this." " Who are you?" " Well, I'm her brother." "How do we know?" "Yeah, yeah." "Can you identify yourself?" "Huh?" "It's a serious thing, posing as somebody's brother." "What's your name?" "Puddin' 'n' Tain." "Ask me again, I'll tell you the same." "Raaah!" "Oh, Burleigh, let's get out of here!" "You hear what he said?" "He started it." "He put it on himself!" "Come on, Burleigh." "You're outnumbered." "No, they're probably gangsters." "Should be arrested." "I've got to do my duty as an American citizen." "Give me that again." "What's your name?" "Joe Monroe." "Ask me again, you still won't know." "He said it again!" "He repeated!" "He repeated!" "I'll give him a last chance to make a dying statement." "This is silly, Burleigh, and dangerous." "It's all right, sis." "I know a million of 'em." "He can't get away with that." "This is it." "What's your name?" "Poo Poo Padoo... that's who I am." "And who are you?" "That's it!" "Fight!" "Fight!" "In front of the club!" "Hurry, hurry!" "Let's go see the fight!" "Who's fighting?" "Everyone, get down on the ground!" "Now, any of you mugs know these mugs?" "I don't know this guy." "But this guy... is the middleweight champion of the world." "Hey, I'd like to shake the hand... of the man that knocked out the middleweight champion!" "So would I!" "Extra!" "Extra!" "Read all about it!" "Middleweight champion knocked out by truck driver!" "Read all about it!" "Extra!" "Well, they kind of got you in a spot, ain't they, Gabby?" "Yeah." "Every time I leave town, something happens!" "That is news." "As a rule... something happens, and then you leave town." "Oh, I see." "Wise guy." "I though you were a faithful reporter." "Listen, I don't want to hear any more..." "Aw, inside, inside." "You'll lose it." "Ha ha ha." "Come on, let's get out of here." "Speed." "Oh, Speed." "Oh..." "Spider!" "Spider!" "Wait!" "Wait a minute!" "Wait a minute!" "Wait a minute." "It's me, Spider!" "How did I get this mouse?" "Ooh." "I don't know." "I wasn't with you." "Oh." " Yes, you were." " Was I?" "Of course you..." "Weren't you?" "What?" "What?" "You shouldn't come in here when Gabby's out of town." "He might think it wasn't on the level." "He wouldn't understand anything that was." " Good morning, Plato." " Plato what?" "Let's keep it simple." "How did you get that?" "Oh, uh... this?" "Oh, you see, uh, I was shadowboxing..." "And the shadow won?" "No, no." "You see, it was like this." "Uh, uh..." "Spider came in, and we started to spar... and... and I ran into one." "Where were you when I called last night?" " Uh... in the shower." " Tub." "More accidents happen in bathrooms." "Look." "That's the story of the lion and the mouse." "It's a lie!" "Then sue the paper." "What's it say?" ""Truck driver knocks out champion."" "Ooh, it must be some other mug." "Yeah, some other middleweight champion." "There ain't no other middleweight champ." "Not officially." "Listen, Ann, be a pal." "You're not gonna say anything to Gabby about this, are you?" "He reads just as easy." "Oh, but he's in Philadelphi." "I hear they got a paper there now." "Gabby, you're his manager, aren't you?" "I'll give you a statement in ten minutes!" "Well, it better be ten minutes, or we'll write one of our own." "Yeah, but you don't know what it means... to lose your reputation, walk down the street... and have the whole town talkin' about you." "No?" "Heh." "Well, twelve years ago in my hometown..." "I went on a hayride." " What's that got to do with it?" " Nothing... except they're still talking about it." "Let me see that." "Oh, that'll be all right in a few days." "Oh, hello, Daddy." "Remind me to ask you later what you were doing in here with him." "I wish you cared." "Well..." "You dumb cluck." "You thick-skulled gorilla." "What do you think I'm feeding you for?" "Why didn't you watch him?" "!" "Well, what do you got to say for yourself?" " I got a headache." " Shut up!" "And you... you... the middleweight champion of the world." "Heh." "Yesterday, you had a title worth $1 million." "Today, it isn't worth a nickel." "I'm in Philly, signing you up to beat Kid Miller for 20 Gs." "I got the pen in my hand all ready to sign, and what happens?" "Yeah." "That's what I want to know... what happened?" "!" "He wants to know what happened." "Heh." "They want to know what happened." "Sure, they want to know." "The lobby's crawling with reporters... and I gotta give them a statement!" "You better get a story ready." "We're gonna need it." "Hello?" "Now, listen, Willard..." "I said I'd give you a statement in ten minutes." " Well, I always keep my word." " Uh-oh." "I said ten minutes, didn't I?" "The rats are coming up in five." "Well, come on, let's have it!" "Come on, come on!" "Listen, Gabby, it was like this." "Spider and I were walking down the street... and... and up comes a guy." "And what a guy." "Right." "Gabby, he was the biggest guy I ever saw." "Bigger!" "Boss, he was bigger than Canary." "Yeah, yeah, with hands as big as watermelons." "How did he wind his watch?" "Speed looked like this alongside of him." "I had to jump up in the air to hit him." "Now, wait a minute, wait a minute." "This is serious." "A big guy, huh?" " Yeah." " Yeah." ""Middleweight knocked out by heavyweight."" "That's an angle." "Grab it, Spider." "Why, he outweighs Speed fifty pounds." "Got a good right hand." "What'll I say?" "Say hello." "They'll pick it up from there." "Hello?" "Who?" "He is?" "!" "The truck driver, Burleigh Sullivan... is on his way up." "Let's all hide under the bed." "Now, be calm, everybody, be calm." "Now, the big stiff is on his way up." "The reporters are downstairs... great." "We'll get a picture of the two of you." "You know, like they do..." "big, little guy?" "Hey, the public gets one look at you... alongside of that big bruiser, why, you'll even get sympathy." "You know what we can do, don't you?" "Why, say, we could take that man-mountain and..." "Well?" "What do you want?" "L..." "I'm Burleigh Sullivan." "It's a lie." "Hands as big as watermelons, huh?" "Come in, Sullivan." "Hello there." "No, you don't." "Now I got him." "Now I got him." "Go on, get the press." "Get the press." "I'll lay him out as flat as a piece of linoleum." "Hit him over here in the sunlight... so the boys can photograph the body." "Now, wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "Before you make any more mistakes..." "Wait a minute." "Are you sure that you're the man... that knocked out our Mr. McFarland?" "Uh, yes, ma'am." "Why, you dirty little worm!" "Easy, easy!" "We got to find out what happened... before they get up here." "Now, start talking!" "In the first place, you gotta cut out all this rough stuff." " All right, cut it out." " That's better." "All right, get started." "Well... you've all read the papers?" " We glanced through them." " Rubbin' it in, huh?" "There he goes again." "Shut up!" "All right, come on." "Now, I don't know how you folks feel about all this... but it's got me worried." " You're looking well." " Oh, thank you." "This thing was partly my fault." "All right if I sit down?" "Yeah." "Now, I'll tell you just how it started." "You see, I've never had my name in the papers." "When I saw a chance to get in the headlines... whew!" "You don't know what that did to me." "See, I lead a very simple life." "I'll bet you do." "Hmm." "At the dairy, I'm only 120-pointer." "That's bad, huh?" "Oh, it's awful." "And then, out of the clear sky, this thing happened last night." "You know?" "And as all those reporters came running up to me..." "I said, "Oh, boy!" "Oh, boy!" "Oh, boy!"" "And, heh, well, I guess I was carried away." "Well, now we're getting somewhere." " It's the telephone." " Yeah." "Eh?" "Comin' upstairs?" "Hey." "Oh, wait a minute." "Come on, let him alone." "Let him alone." "Tell the boy I'll give him 5 bucks to stall the elevator." "Now, come on." "Let's get down to cases." "How did the champ get knocked out?" "Oh." "When I was a little boy..." "Listen." "Do you have to go back that far?" "Now, please don't stop me." "He's nervous, isn't he?" "What do you suggest?" " Well, warm milk's very good." " No, he's tried that." "Listen, come on, let's get going." "Um, well, when I was a little boy..." "Can't you start when you were a little older?" "Oh, no, I gotta start when I'm a little boy." "We got no time to wait for you to grow up!" "Aw, now I'm all rattled." "Now you've got him all rattled." "Aw, come on." "Come on and tell Ann all about it." "Just once." "Well, when I was a little boy, I was sort of puny." "Hey... you can get in on this." "All right, thanks." "The big boys used to pick on me." "They threw things at me..." "bricks and tomatoes." "You know, like kids do." "So I learned to duck." "To what?" "To duck." "Hmm." "See what I mean?" "Oh, I had to." "I finally got so good at it... that I could put my hands in my pockets and..." "Bet the kids pennies they couldn't knock my hat off." "They couldn't, either." "You know, once, I made enough to take my mother... and my sister Mae to the picture show." " Say, you met her last night." " Look here." "I'm trying to find out how the champ got knocked out... and you keep talking about milk and puny babies and movies!" "Now, this isn't gonna get you anywhere." "How'd you like to have me do that to you?" "That's all right." "Go ahead." "Now I don't know where I was." "Now, listen, Sully, you were a puny little boy... and you took your mother and sister to a picture show." "Now do you remember?" "Oh, yes." "I even remember the picture." "You remember the one where the man..." "locked the girl in his cabin and he chased her round and round?" "Oh, that one?" "Yes." " You do?" " Yes." "How did it end?" "My mother took me home." "Take the witness." "Now, look here." "Pay attention to me." "Now, listen, don't let your mind wander." " Keep it in a straight line." " They're comin' up the stairs!" "You hear what he said?" "They're comin' up the stairs." "Listen, you gotta think." "You gotta think!" "You gotta concentr..." "Listen, you got us all nuts around here." "The first thing you know... you'll be telling me you didn't knock him out!" " I didn't." " That's what I said." "What's that you said?" "I said I didn't knock him out." "Everybody hear that?" "Did you all hear that?" "He didn't knock him out!" "Hey!" "That's our angle." "That's our out." "Ann, open the door and let the press in!" "You didn't knock him out." "No." " You don't deny it." " No." "What are you gonna tell the press?" " He knocked him out." " It's a lie!" "So, you hung it on me!" "You weren't with me last night, huh?" "Really!" "Cross my heart, he did!" "He can't get away with that!" "Cut it out, now!" "Go on, muzzle him!" "Ohh!" "Hey, cut it out." "What are you tryin' to do?" "Settle down, will you?" "Yes, if you'll settle down..." "I'll explain exactly what happened." "All right, go ahead." "Give us the lowdown." "Well, in the first place, he swung at me and missed." "I never miss." "Yes, you missed me." "Then..." "Hey!" "I can't hit you, huh?" "No." "You see what I mean?" "There." "You see, Mr. Sloan?" "That's point number one." "He swung at me and missed." "See?" "But I never miss!" "Hey." "Oh, no." "That's not the way to do it..." "Look, this is the way." "See?" "Like that?" "Uh..." "Cut this nonsense." "Will you kindly tell me how I got knocked..." "Mr. Sloan, that's exactly what happened!" "Why, what a story!" "Twice in one day!" "He gave him another demonstration." "Wait a minute." "I can explain everything." "He can explain better." "Yeah, but I didn't do it." "It was an accident." " What an accident!" " He's right." "I did it!" "How much did Gabby give you to say that?" "Where's that..." "Give me that, you press rat!" "Give me that!" "Get out of here, you buzzards!" "Get out of here, you buzzards!" "Get out of here!" " Say something." " Uhh." "OK." "He'll be all right, doctor." "It's the shock, that's all." "What he really needs is sleep." "This'll fix him up." "Now, give him a spoonful of that... and a glass of water." "Someone should..." "Oh, I'll watch him, doctor." "You remember, I looked after him... the time he got his face caught in a cash register." "Yes." "Ha ha." "Well, good night, doctor." "Good night." "Good night, gentlemen." "Good night." "Come on, doc." "Get going, will you?" "Get going." " Good night." " Good night." "Good night." "I got it." "I got it!" "What'd the doctor say it was?" "Get Sullivan, come on." "Get Sullivan." "I got it." "I tell ya I got it." "It's an angle, and what an angle!" "Come on, get Sullivan, bring him up here." "Bring him up here!" "Bring him right up here!" "That does it!" "That re..." "Oh, dear." "Oh." "Heh." "Yeah." "OK." "Want your sugar?" "Huh?" "Do you?" "Well, heh... how do I know you love me?" "Hmm?" "How do I know you love me?" "Oh?" "Ohh, yes." "Now, wait a minute." "Wait, now." "Wait, now." "Wait, now." "Wait, now." "Tell me you love me." "That's it." "Mmm." "Here." "Oh." "I got some more." "Wait a minute." "I got some more." "Look." "All right, guess which?" "Hey, you." "The boss wants to see you." "You're comin' with me." "No, sir." "I've got work to do." "Come on!" "Anyway, I'm not going up there again... anyway." "What's that?" "Once bitten, twice shy." "Huh?" "Give me that once again." "I don't chew my cabbage twice." "So you're startin' that again, huh?" "Hey!" "Two against one, huh?" "I'll show you." "Listen, you..." "Iooky here..." "I'm delivering grade-A milk, for better babies." "You under..." "Gabby won't take no for an answer!" "You better cut it out now!" "You... you can get in trouble for this, you know!" "Ow!" "You let me go, now!" "Come on, not another word out of you!" "You're coming with me!" "Look out." "I got a gun." "A gat, huh?" "Come on, come on!" "He's a... he's a dangerous character, officer!" "He's a menace to humanity!" "Wait a minute, officer!" "This... this is a cinch to explain." "Yeah, I know." "I'm a witness." "Come on." "Hey, wait a minute!" "I can get out of this!" "Uh-huh." "If that guy can fight a lick... we'll pack the Garden, or maybe the Polo Grounds." "Or a telephone booth." "How about a swig of this sleeping medicine?" "He's a natural." "We build him a rep... and he'll be the biggest drawing card since Dempsey." "First, he's gotta knock out a few setups." "Starting with you?" "You got the idea." "He knocks over six setups... and then he meets you at the Polo Grounds." "And we have a new champion." "That's Spider in the lobby." "We're all in glory!" "Hello, Spider." "You got him in the lobby?" "Well, bring him." "What?" "You're what?" "!" "He's in jail!" "Oh, my..." "It's all my fault for trusting a lug like that." "I should've had more sense." "I should've sent somebody with brains." " Yeah." "Yeah." " Yeah." "You." "Yeah, why don't you go?" " Yeah." "Yeah." " That's right." "Where will I find him?" "You stop the first milk wagon you come to... and if you're still on your feet, you say to yourself..." ""That's not him."" "Yeah." "Thanks for the tip." "This program is coming to you... through the courtesy of Amalgamated Gas." "Will you stop ringing my doorbell?" "Did somebody tell you it was halloween?" "I tell you, I gotta see your brother." "And I told you my brother isn't here." "And I don't believe you." "Will you believe me when I tell you..." "I'm going to get some sleep?" "No." "What's the idea?" "Oh, I'm sorry." "I didn't know it was your bell." "You ought to be ashamed of yourself... a big fella like you... goin' around, ringing people's doorbells." "I said I was sorry." "What more can I say?" "It's not the idea." "It's the principle of the thing." "My wife's been talkin' for two hours." "She finally went to sleep." "You come along and wake her up." "Well, what am I supposed to do about that?" "You're supposed to beat it before I get sore." " Oh, gettin' tough, huh?" " Just as tough as you are." "Now, wait a minute, buddy." "My business is knocking out people." " Is that so?" " Yeah." "And for two cents, I'll let you have one right on..." "Hey." "I'm in business myself." "Come on, buddy." "Let's go." "Hello, Speed?" "You got him in the lobby?" "Where are you?" "Ohh!" "What have I done to deserve this?" "!" "Every time I pick up this phone, I get bad news!" "Well, I'll put a stop to that." "That's two of them in jail!" "Or maybe three." "That's bad." "That's no good, you know." "That's a misdemeanor." "Cops are coming up." "What's my angle?" "What's my out?" "Why don't you tell them when you were a little boy... you were kind of puny." "That ought to do it." "Yeah." "Agnes." "What's the matter?" "Get up." "Oh, my." "Oh, no." "That can't... that can't be right." "Oh." "Agnes." "Ohh." "Help!" "Help!" "My horse!" "Help!" "Help!" "Hello?" "Hello?" "Hello?" "Hello." "May I use your telephone?" "Yes, I need a doctor." " Are you hurt?" " No, no, no." "I'm all right, thank you." "Hello?" "Hello?" "!" "Hello?" " Oh." "Hello?" "Yes, look..." " Why did you dial here?" "Just one moment." "Will you hold the phone?" "I'm talking to someone." "Yes, here's what I want." "I need a..." "Quit bothering me at this time of night." "I'm talking over here to..." "Yes, I'm trying to explain..." "No, I'm talking to the other fellow." "One sec... hello?" "Well, uh..." "Hello, here's what..." "hello?" "!" "Hello?" "!" "Hello?" "!" "Hello!" "Hello up there!" "Go on, get!" "Hey, cut that noise out down there." "What's the matter with you?" "Hey, come on!" "Beat it!" "I want to go to sleep!" "I've got to have a telephone!" " A telephone!" " Phone?" "Yes!" "Hello?" "Uh... hello!" "You can use my phone." " Oh." " 313." "Third floor." "Thank you!" "Thank you very much!" "Yes!" "Come in." " The phone's over there." " Thank you." " This is sure nice of you." " That's all right." "Hello?" "Hello?" "Is this Kinney?" "This is Burleigh." "Something's happened to Agnes." "Yeah." "She's lying in the gutter." "Huh?" "She won't get up!" "Yeah, her tongue's hanging out a foot!" "Thirsty?" "Oh, she couldn't be." "She's had plenty to drink." "What she's got's a bellyache." "Yeah, you'd better get her an ambulance." "Uh, this is 56, Lotus Apartments." "Yes." "Well, you'd better bring the lady up here or..." "Oh, she's not a lady." "I didn't think she was, but if she's sick... it doesn't make a difference what kind of woman she is." "Oh, but Agnes..." "she's just an old horse." "Oh, I thought..." "Well, thank you very much." "Thanks a lot." "Heh." "Good-bye." "No, no, the other door." "Over there." "Oh, yeah." "Thank you." "Heh." "Heh." "Hello, Sunflower Dairy?" "Maybe you can help me out." "One of your men left his cap in my apartment." "Oh, about 3:00 this morning." "No, I don't know his name." "Well, he was about 5'10"... has dark hair and glasses... and, uh, and a very pleasant smile." "Yes." "Well, if you know who it is... would you ask him to stop by the Acme Barbershop?" " Manicure!" " Manicure!" "Aha..." " Hello." " Hello." "Heh." "I was just talking about you." "Heh." "Yeah, I know." "Heh." "How is Agnes?" "Oh." "She's not very good." "I was up with her all night." "Oh, that's too bad." "Yeah, I took her to a good doctor, though." "No powder." "Well, I hope she'll be all right." " Do you?" " Uh-huh." "All through." "Hmm?" "Oh, uh, give me another shave." " Another shave?" " Yeah." "Hey!" "Hey!" "You let me go!" "Cut it out, now!" "Stop it!" "Help!" "Uhh!" "Uhh!" "You give me back my pants!" "Give me my pa..." "Pardon me." "Oh, don't mind me." "I used to work with the Four Flying Fagins." "Turn around." "Well, there's one thing in his favor... he's got a front and a back." "What do you think?" "Wrap him in a horse blanket till the bell rings." " Say, what is this?" " Gotta take some of that off." "And you can't do that!" "I know where I'm low on..." "Soft as a bag of dead mice." "It's no soap, Gabby." "That string bean couldn't lick Zasu Pitts." "It's gotta work!" "He's gotta fight somebody in thirty days." "It's our only out!" "He's gotta fight somebody." "Hey." "Hey." "Might I say something?" "Quiet, boys." "He wants to say something." "I'm sorry, but I just don't want to fight." "Ha ha ha ha." "Listen, Burleigh, I'm your friend." "I'm Honest Gabby Sloan." "I'm trying to do you a favor..." " You're not..." " Wait a minute!" " You haven't heard me yet!" " Nervous." "Get a picture of this..." "you're up to here in dough... you've got a string of big cars from here to Boyle's Half-Acre." "The dames are doing nip-ups over you in the street." "The crowds are pointing at you." "They're yelling, "There he goes!"" " Who?" " You." "Why?" "Because you're the big shot!" "You're fighting for the title." "It's the Polo Grounds." "80,000 people are going batty." " There goes the bell." " I'll answer it." "There goes the gong." "You're at him like a tiger." "He leads." "The Tiger ducks." "That's you." "You're the Tiger." "He leads again." "The Tiger ducks again." " No, no." " No, what?" "That's nothing like it." "Here, I'll show you." "You gotta get that knee action, see?" "Now, here." "Relax." "You're a bundle of nerves." "Mm." "Come on, give it here." "Give." "That's better." "That's it..." "Don't you want to learn how to duck?" "We're back in the Polo Grounds." "The Tiger leads a left, a right, a left." " 90,000 people are..." " 80,000." "All right, 80,000." "That's one for you." " 80,000 people are..." " And not quite 80,000." "What do you mean by, "Not quite 80,000"?" "Because I won't be there." "Two up for him, and game." "Talk isn't gonna do this monkey any good... but I'll show you what will!" "Now I got you." "Now I got you!" "Try this one on your piano." "Why, you big hoodlum." "You big, Swiss bell-ringer." "I don't like dames that hit gentlemen." "Another ducker?" "Burleigh, what are they doing to you?" "They're trying to make a fighter out of me." "We wasn't doin' nothing." "You get out of here!" "All of you get out of here!" "Brooklyn hospitality." " You're a bunch of hoodlums." " Who's a hoodlum?" "!" " He's the worst." " I ain't no hoodlum!" "Get out of here!" "The little lady is right." "My apologies and my regrets, Miss Sullivan." " Uh, uh, Burleigh." " Yes?" "Just one thing before I go." "If you think of me at all, Burleigh... try to remember me as... as honest Gabby Sloan." "All right." "Who came to lay a future in your lap... a future that you'd be proud of... that your lovely sister would be proud of... and that that... that dear, sweet-faced, kindly old lady would be proud of." "Hmm?" "You know, Burleigh, I sometimes wonder... if we're half the men our mothers hoped we'd be." "Hmm..." "I'll bet your mother's a sweet little woman." "Yeah." "She's been having a little trouble... with her kidneys lately." "Hasn't she, sis?" "You know, Burleigh, that's uncanny." "If I didn't know, I'd swear that that was my mother." "Maybe it is your mother." "It was here when we moved in." "Maybe that's your father." "He was here, too." "Pardon me." "That's my horse." "How about a glass of warm milk?" "Hello?" "But she was sick, Mr. Kinney." "I had to take her to the hospital." "Yes, I know those things cost money." "Oh, Burleigh?" "Did I hear you say you needed cash?" "What?" "!" "Oh, you couldn't sell her hide." "No, Mr. Kinney..." "I'm not trying to tell you how to run your business." "Go ahead and tell him." "What do you care?" "But you can't do that to Agnes!" "What?" "All right, fire me, then." "But she's worth more than that to me alive." "Huh?" "No, I've never had that much money in my whole life." "Have I, sis?" "No!" "But I'll get it." "Hang up on the rat!" "Oh, don't listen to him, Burleigh." "You'll get that money." "You... you..." "How?" " By signing a contract with me..." " Hold the wire." "But a fortune!" "For a few moments' pleasant employment... in a cool, airy arena." "I'll do it." "Good morning." "Good mo... good morning." " Where's Spider?" " At the ring." "Oh." "Heh." "My, you look lovely this morning." "And vice-versa." "Oh, thank you." "Heh." "Oh." "Oh, Tiger?" "We always use the bridge." "Oh, yeah." "Heh." " Hello." " Ahh." "You perspire easy, don't you?" "No, I..." "I..." "Never mind that." "Where'd you get those?" "Elastic broke..." "Never mind that, too." "Let's get going." "It's your first fight." "The bell rings... you come out fighting'... you mix it up in the middle of the ring." "He's throws a right, you duck." "He throws a left, you duck." "Suddenly, the crowd goes nuts." "There's a guy down." "Not you." "He's down, and he's out." "Eight, nine, ten!" "And you're the winner." "Don't you think that we ought to practice losing?" "Don't worry." "You'll win." "Give me that." "How's that?" "Fine." "Now, keep it on." "I know two fellas once that got into the same spot." "Six months later, they got the gloves away from them." "They're all right now." "Have I got to go on with this?" "You can't quit." "Think of your career." "It's the monotony of the thing that's getting me down." "All right, let's see." "Where were we?" "Oh, yeah." "You're the win..." "Oh, no." "You win." "And to look good... you give 'em the old business." "You give 'em that, you give 'em this... and to top it, you give 'em this." "See?" "Now we'll start from the beginning." "The bell rings." "I'm the other fella." "Put 'em up." "Ain't you ever fought?" "Uh-uh." "All right." "Now make a face." "Nah, no." "Make a face to scare him." "Like yours?" " I never scare nobody." " You scare me." "Aw, put 'em up." "All right, I'm the other fella." "You come in swinging." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "Start swinging." "Oh, no." "I might hurt you." "I'll take a chance." "I'm very game." "All right." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom..." "What's holding you up?" "Nah, nah, get tough." "Give it all you got." "Oh, no." "Come on, start swingin'." "All right." "Now what?" "That's all." "I quit." " Oh, Tiger?" " Yeah." " Or are you too busy?" " Huh?" "No." "No, no." "Do you know how to dance?" "Dance?" "Yes." "At the sunflower, you know, we used to..." "Yeah, I'm convinced." "How do you hold a girl?" "Like that." "Now close your fists." "Now dance." "Without music?" "Ahem." "Tra la la-la..." "Now, wait a minute." "Now, listen." "Tra la-la-la" "Boom, boom." "Tra la la-la" "Boom, boom." "Tra la la-la" "Boom, boom." "Tra la la-la la" "La la la, boom, boom, boom" "Tra la la-la la-la" "La la-la la la-la" "Tra la la-la la-la" "La la-la la la-la" "Tra la la la la la la-la la la-la..." "This is what I tell him..." ""Dear Joe, we'll be in Detroit on the ninth." ""Don't worry about the weight." ""He'll make it with a quart of milk in each hand."" "Ha ha!" "It's all set, Speed." "Chicago on the fourth, Detroit on the ninth." "La la-la la la-la" "Tra la la-la la-la la la-a la la-la" "Tra la la-la la-la la la-a la la-la..." "Why can't I just punch him in the nose in public... and get it over with?" "The way you talk, Speed... is the difference between a smart guy and a grape nut." "Uh-oh." "Look what's coming to our house." "Yes, and coming to make trouble." "Now, get a hold of them." "Stop them... and keep them away from that waltzing mouse." "Now, listen, Speed." "That sister's plenty tough." "Make a play for her, and if she falls for you... she'll be a cinch to handle." "Turn on that 160 pounds of personality." "And if you want to put her in a good humor... tell her I broke my leg and you had to shoot me." "Hey!" "Where do you think you're going?" "There's Polly and Mae!" "So what?" "Dames and fighters don't mix." "That's what he found out." " Oh!" " Come on." "Keep calm." "But I want to say hello to them!" "Keep cool." "Take him over and give him a shower." "While you're there, take one yourself." "Hey, I'm..." "What can you lose?" "Look." "Oh, don't worry, Polly." "I'll do the talking." "I'll tell that Gabby Sloan that..." "Welcome, welcome, welcome." "Hmm." "That means we're welcome." "Miss Pringle, Mr. McFarland." " How do you do?" " How do you do?" "I want to talk to Mr. Sloan." "And you most certainly would if he was here... but, uh, he's in town." "Tooth." "Mm." "Out to here." "Good." "Maybe I can talk to you." "Now, that's a pleasure." "If you'll excuse us..." "Oh, I'll be around." "Give me back those pants!" "I'll fix you!" "Hey, come back with that towel!" "Come here!" "I ain't through with you." "Don't get the wrong impression of the fight game... just because a few fighters walk on their heels." "The wise ones don't." "Look at me." "I am." "Why are you so interested in Burleigh?" "Well, in the first place... because he's..." "he's your brother." "That doesn't even make sense." "What I wouldn't give for a place like this... with a cow and a few chickens... and you." "Honey, if this thing works out..." "and it can't miss..." "I'll get you a place like this and a million chickens." "You know, I've heard all that before." "When I first met you, I had two of everything." "Now I've got one of nothing." "WXJK... ladies and gentlemen, "The Tannenbaum Hour."" "I just can't imagine your being a fighter." "Oh, well, it's just a means to an end." "Had to have some money quickly... and, well, as soon as Agnes is better..." "I'm going back to the dairy business." "You think a whole lot of Agnes, don't you?" "Mm-hmm." "Look." "That came right off her tail." " I made it myself." " You did?" "It's my good luck charm." "Well, you weren't very lucky... when you lost your job, were you?" "No, but..." "I was lucky when I met you." "Heh." "You know..." " you're an awfully nice person." " You're an awfully nice person." " Thumbs." " Thumbs." " Heh." " Heh." "One, two..." "Heh." "That guy Hogan's terrible." "Yeah." "Mr. Hogan's doing everything you taught me." "Four, five... six, seven... eight, nine, ten!" "OK, kid." "You're next." "Now?" "Yep." "Right now." "Come on, Tiger!" "Hey, give me that phone!" "Give me that phone!" "Hey!" "Get down, get down." "Mr. Sloan, I..." "I don't feel so good." "What's the matter, buddy?" "I don't know." "I think I got a chill." "There's your trouble right here." "Huh?" "Oh." "Heh." "Yeah." "Feel better now." "He's not much to look at, folks... but if you don't think he packs a wallop... ask our erstwhile champion Speed McFarland." "He's fighting a good man..." "Tornado Todd." "And here's Todd now." "Can you imagine having to lose to this guy." "It don't seem right." " Mr. Sloan?" " Yeah." "Do you think I've had enough boxing lessons?" "Listen, Burleigh, you got nothin' to worry about." "With everything we taught you... and that good luck horsehair charm you got, it's a cinch." "Hmm?" "What's the matter with you now?" "My charm." "Ladies and gentlemen..." " Yeah!" " Yeah!" "In this corner, we have Tornado Todd!" "And in this corner, we have..." "Throw in a couple of Filipinos." "I'll have him back in ten minutes." "Folks, folks!" "Oh, it's a circumstance over which... the milkman has no control!" "Am I supposed to ask what you're looking for?" "I'm looking for a horse's tail!" "Oh." "Mike looking for Ike, huh?" "Yeah, and I gotta find it." "He must've left it around here somewhere." "Where's the wonder boy?" "He's in the dressing room." "Spider's sitting on him." "Oh, here it is!" "W-what was that?" "Tiger O'Duck... pursued by the headless horseman." "You Judas!" "He sent me for a bag of peanuts... and when I come back, what do you think?" " You forgot the peanuts." " No, he was gone!" "Hey, Burleigh." "Look, here's your good luck charm." " Come on out." " Uh-uh." "Oh, look, just what we were looking for... the horse's tail." "Come on, let's hurry." "You know, Mr. Sloan, as I was running across 42nd Street..." "You tried to make a left hand turn?" "You can't." "Anyway, as I was running..." "I got to thinking." "Got to wondering... if you couldn't put this fight off till tomorrow night." "Maybe I'd feel more like it then." "Some of the boys might not be able... to get out again tomorrow night." "I'll get him, boss." "I see." "A quitter." "Oh, no." "I'm not quitting." "Gee, that's swell." "Then come on, let's go." "I'm just not starting." "I see." "You want to double-cross a guy... that never did a dirty trick in his life." "You know, I..." "I don't deserve this, Spider." "Tiger." "Uh, Tiger." "Excuse me." "You've done something to me... right here." "Let me bust the door in!" "If you do, I'll go down the fire escape." "Come on!" "Are you gonna fight or aren't you?" "!" "Uh-uh." "Well... if it's no go, there's no hard feelings." "To show you the kind of a guy I am..." "I'm going over to call the whole thing off." "Oh, thanks." " Good-bye, Burleigh." " Good-bye." "Hey!" "No, wait!" "Uhh!" "And don't forget, folks, this fight program comes to you... through the courtesy of Weinbaum's Wonder Wafers... those delicious chocolate-coated..." "Groceries." "Oh, it's you." "Yes, sir!" "And are we gonna celebrate." "Your brother knocked out the Tornado... in the first round." "Heh." "Well, it isn't over." "You said it..." "What isn't over?" " The fight." " What do you mean?" "Well, it hasn't started." "Well, it's supposed to be over." "There's the Tiger." "There, he's coming down the aisle now." "A tremendous ovation, folks!" "And no wonder." "This is the lad who knocked the middleweight champ... off the front page of every newspaper." "They were going to introduce Mr. McFarland tonight..." "Why aren't you there?" "Oh, I'd much rather be here with you." "To put it mildly... maybe the thought of meeting Mr. Sullivan again... made him a little bashful." "The dope." "There they go, folks." "The Tornado comes out like a wild bull." "He swings, the Tiger ducks." "He swings again, the Tiger ducks." "The Tiger ducks again!" "Folks, what a..." "Oh..." "Sullivan sends in a jab to the face." "He sends in another!" "Tornado's down, folks!" "He's down!" "Five..." "He's winning!" "Seven..." "Oh, Burleigh." "Burleigh!" "He won!" "The Tiger wins!" "Sullivan won!" "Ha ha!" "And he knocked him out." "And in the first round, too." "Sullivan won!" "In the first round!" "But why didn't he get up?" "Because of that good right hand, that's why." "The old one-two." "I don't have to fight anymore?" " Nah." "It's all over." " All over?" "!" "Maybe I can get the Fighting Milkman... to say a few words." "And here he is now!" "Tell them about it, Burleigh." "Hello, folks." "You know, I'm just as surprised as you are... because I could swear that I missed him." " Ohh!" " Ohh!" "Ha ha ha ha ha!" "What a wit, what a clown." "What a fighter!" "This is honest Gabby Sloan... his manager..." "talking, folks." "And I want to say right here and now... that of all the boys I've ever handled..." "I've never had a boy that had the zip, the snap... and the up-and-at-'em that Tiger Sullivan's got." "Ha ha ha!" "And with it all, what color!" "Oh!" "Heh!" "Yeah!" "Ha ha!" "And what an entertainer, folks!" "He's got the crowd hysterical!" "For years and years, we looked for a fighter that..." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "Mr. Sloan?" "Mr. Sloan?" "Mmm." "What... what is it?" "Mr. Sloan, what is "color"?" "What's what?" "Color." "That stuff you was talking about... on the radio..." "that I got." "That's what gets a guy's name in the newspapers." "Hmm." "Uh, like what, for instance?" "Like what what?" "I mean, like who, for instance?" "It's what makes a man stand out from the crowd... makes him talked about." "Dizzy Dean's got it, Bobby Jones has got it..." "Amelia Earhart's got it." " And Mae West?" " She's got it in a big way." "Yeah." "Suppose that I had what all four of them's got." "I'd pack 'em in, huh?" "I hope to tell you." "That's what I thought." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "One, two, boom." "Hey!" "Let's have a little service here!" "How about it?" "Any mail for me?" "Yes, Mr. Sullivan." "Here." "Read 'em, Spider." "Come on out, boys." "He won't hurt you." "He's gentle as a kitten." "There's the bell!" "Some of the local newspapers... think this fight will go ten rounds." "Others think about eight." "Your announcer thinks... your announcer knows... it's over!" "It's Sullivan!" "Sullivan in the first!" "Boys..." "I've got the biggest idea I've ever thought of in my life." "Tonight, I'm leaving for Chicago." "Tomorrow, I'm buying the Fighting Milkman's contract." "Now, what do you think of that as an advertising argument... for Sunflower Milk, eh?" " Swell!" " Yeah!" "Hey!" "Gee, I'm glad to see you, Gabby." "Ha!" "You should be." "Been reading about us in the paper?" "Yeah." "Say, what happened to the milkman?" "Color, honey." "That's what's done it... color." "One night on the train, I got to thinking." "I got an idea that the milkman needed color." "That's what you've been reading about." "He fell for it in a big way, and so did the public." "Then, out of the clear sky, along comes a guy..." " This guy?" " Yes!" "Mr. Austin, Austin, Austin, Miss Westley." "He bought the milkman's contract from me for $50,000." " Oh!" "I'm delighted." " Sunflower Dairy." "I'll see you at my house tonight." "I've invited some friends." "You see..." "I thought we'd make the signing of the articles... a big thing, eh?" "Ha ha ha ha!" "Hello, sis!" "Oh!" "Bless your heart!" " How are you?" " Well, Bur..." "Oh, you're looking fine." "Folks, this is my little sister." "Ohh!" "Hello, Speed." " How about a picture of you two?" " Sure, you betcha." "Get ready, will you, boys?" "That's fine." " Ha." "Anything for you." " Here's what I had in mind." "The paper wanted a full page, you see?" "With you and the champ standing together." "But I said to them, "It might be better..." ""if the two of you were standing..."" "Yes, sir." "The idea is to get a picture of you with the champ lying down." "Come on, make it snappy, make it snappy." "This is all you're gonna get." "Oh!" "You shouldn't!" "Oh, you shouldn't." "Now, wait a minute!" "You can't do this to me!" "Come on, come on." "I know 50,000 will buy a lot of chickens." "Chickens?" "Honey, it'll buy ostriches." "You haven't heard anything yet." "You're right." "I'm still trying to find out... where the money is." "All right, here it comes." "Mr. Sunflower Dairy has insisted... that I bet the 50,000 back on the champ... and I had to take it." "You mean that if Speed loses, we have nothing?" "Yeah." "But how can he lose?" "I don't know." "But it'll be in the papers." "Sorry, folks, sorry." "Burleigh, I can't wait to tell you." "It's awfully important." "You see, Speed and I are going to be..." "Oh!" "There's Polly!" "Polly!" "Uh, pardon me." "Pardon me." "Polly!" "You know what?" "We'll get married anyway." "Polly!" "Polly, hello!" "Have I got a lot to tell you." "I have a lot to tell you, too, Burleigh." "Burleigh, how about a picture of you and the love interest?" " Sure." " All right, fine." "Come on, boys, get your cameras all set." "Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute." "Come on, now." "Might as well." "They all do it." "Heh." "And I'll do it, too." "Come on, Burleigh!" "We've got to get to the Paramount Theater." "Oh, yeah." "Come on." "Ahh!" "Well, honey, what do you think of me now?" "I think you sold the wrong fighter." "Oh, you don't get me." "Listen, you're talking to a guy... that kidded an out-and-out dub... into thinking he was a great fighter." "Now, all Speed has got to do is to give him one good punch... and we collect a cool fortune... minus a few dollars for the Tiger's hospital bills." "We ought to pay that." "What do you think?" "I think you talk too much." "Listen, honey, I can explain everything." "Wait a minute, honey." " You great big phony baloney." " You don't get it." "All this time, you've been making a play for me... so I wouldn't stand in the way of your foul plot... to murder my brother." "You don't understand." " Oh, I don't?" " No, you don't." "My public won't want to see me anymore." "I don't, either." "It's my only out!" "Oh, I get it." ""Darling, I love you," Said he... breaking her brother's jaw." "Oh, wait a minute, honey." "I promise you..." "I won't hit him any harder than this." "What was that?" "That's my brother." "Come on, let's get out of here." "Don't look back." " How do you do, Mrs. Lemoyne?" " Good evening." " Good evening, Mrs. Lemoyne." " Good evening, my dear." "Oh, I beg your pardon, Mrs. Lemoyne." "Uh, this is a pleasure, Mrs. Lemoyne." "Good evening, Mr. Austin." " Hiya." " How do you do?" "I'd like to have you meet some of my friends." "Certainly." ""The party of the first part, in this instance..." ""agrees with the party of the second part..."" "I wouldn't give the dame a nickel." "I said, "The party of the first part agrees..." ""with the party of the second part..."" "Well?" "Will you go away?" "I'm trying to get you some ice cream!" "Tutti-frutti?" ""...in witness whereof..." ""the parties hereto have hereunto affixed..." ""their hands and seals in triplicate."" "Now all we need are the signatures." "How about a statement to the press, Mrs. Lemoyne?" "Yeah, give him a load of it from your angle." "The milk fund, as you all know, is an idea of my own... designed purely as a means of raising funds for charity." "Of course, I know nothing about fisticuffs... but the cause is a worthy one." "Makes me very happy... when I think of the thousands of tiny tots... who will receive abundant nourishment... from this, um..." "oh, what shall I say?" "The Sunflower Dairy." "Yes." "To my dear friend Mr. Austin... and to you, Mr. Sloan, my sincerest gratitude." "That ought to kill 'em." "Hello there." "Come on, Speed." "They're waitin' for you." "Let me have that contract." "That's it." "Now, you sign on the bottom line." "The top line is for Burleigh." "And you better make it Elwood McFarland... instead of..." "Ha ha ha!" "Yeah." "That Elwood always bothers him a little." "I'm not fightin', Gabby." "Quiet, everybody." "Quiet, now." "Take it easy." "Don't everyone speak at once." "Yeah." "You know my blood pressure." "A cheap joke like that, and I'm liable to fall right on my face." "Now, where was I?" "Oh, yeah." "You sign that contract." "I'm not gonna fight my brother-in-law." "Your brother-in..." " There goes my pump." " There goes my chicken coop." "Can he do that?" "What on earth..." "Ha ha ha ha ha!" "Mr. Sullivan, they're signing the contracts in the library." "Oh, fine." "Come on, Polly." "You go ahead, Burleigh." "I'll join you later." "OK." "Gentlemen, the contract." "Oh, uh, what seems to be the trouble?" "There's the contract." "It's cold." "Yeah, but I don't..." "Why don't you tell him?" "He wants to know." "It still goes." "I'm not gonna fight my brother-in-law." "He's not your brother-in-law yet." "Say, that's an angle." "Why don't you wait a couple of months, huh?" "We can't wait." "I mean, we don't want to." "Don't be a piece of putty." "Take my word for it." "A couple of months is nothing." "Yeah, we waited fifteen years, and look at us." "Well, we're not waitin', and I'm not fightin'." "Oh, thanks, Speed." "You've take a great load off my mind." "I'll bet I did." "You sure did." "It had me worried." "For nights, I wasn't sleeping." "I tried warm milk and everything." " Internally?" " And I..." "Of course." "Why?" "Never mind." "Go on." "Well, anyway, night after night..." "I kept dreaming the same dream..." "there was you and sis... and your three beautiful kids." "What?" "Incidentally, you'll love them." "Especially Junior." "He looks just like you." "Oh, cut it out, will you?" "Well, anyway, there they were on the front porch... and as I came through the gate, they all started to scream..." ""Mama!" "Mama!" "There comes Uncle Burleigh..." ""the man that knocked out Papa!"" "Yeah." "So, that's it?" "Your attitude regarding babies... simply fascinates me." "I'm Mrs. Lemoyne." "I'm delighted." "You know, you're a most remarkable fellow." "You know, you're not so bad yourself." "Ha!" "Well, much as I should like to sponsor the milk fund affair..." "I find myself deeply affected by what you've been saying." "Really?" "Hmm." "Won't you tell me something about yourself?" "Well, when I was a little boy, I was kind of puny..." "Our children will not cry when they see Uncle Burleigh." " No?" " No." "Elwood, you sign that contract." "Gee, honey, you mean..." "Gabby, the contract!" "The contract!" "I got a million of 'em!" "Willard, get Sullivan!" "That's a smart move, miss." "You know, I finally got so good at it... that I could put my hands in my pockets... and bet the kids pennies they couldn't knock my hat off." "And they couldn't, either." "Heh." "What was that you just did?" "That's the old box shift." "That's what you've been reading about in the papers." " Ha ha ha." " Heh." "No, nothing like it." "No?" "You gotta give it that knee action." " You're pretty good." " Ha ha ha!" " You're fine!" " Oh, you're a darling!" "Now I'll show you how I use it in the ring." " Yes." " All right." " You swing at me." " You mean actually hit you?" "Go ahead." "I won't be there." " You sure?" "All right." " Mm-hmm." "Oh, not like that." "Look, you must let it go." "Mm." "That's it." "That's the stuff." "Follow right through." "Mm-hmm." "All right, now." "Now, watch." "All right." "Ha!" "That's wonderful!" "Oh, you know... really, that's..." "that's fascinating." "No... you're too stiff." "Yes, I know I am." " Yeah, you must relax." " Uh-huh." "Here." "Give it to me." " There." " Uh-huh." "Now, more freedom." "That's it." " Oh, yes." " And, uh..." "Ioosen up here." "That's better." "Don't forget the old knee action." "No." "No, I remember." "Now... now you..." "you do it to me." " You mean it?" " Uh-huh!" "All right." "Heh!" "You remember what I taught you?" "Uh-huh." "If you forget, it's bad." "Very good!" "That was wonderful!" "Do it some more." "All right." "Uhh!" "Uhh!" "Uhh!" "Oh, Mr..." "Mr. Sull..." "Wait!" "Mr. Sullivan..." "Hello, Polly." " I, uh... how do you do?" " How do you do?" "We'll, uh, take this matter up later." "Yeah." "Heh." "They want you in there." "The fight's on again." "Speed says he wants to go through with it." "What?" "OK." "Tell him the Tiger will be there in two minutes." "But this is just like committing suicide." "You're right, Tiger." "Heh heh." "Oh, there you are." "Good." "Burleigh, I don't even know you." "You don't know me?" "Oh, now, Polly... you're being facetious, aren't you?" "I was never more serious in my life." "The boy I knew went away and never came back." "Yes, he did." "I'm the same fellow." "I can prove it." "I'll show you my driver's license." "No, you don't understand, Burleigh." "I met a boy once that..." "Well, to say the least, I liked him very much." " Oh." " No." "No, that was the old Burleigh... the nice fellow, the one who was kind to horses... the humanitarian." "But the one who came back... came back with the smell of blood... still fresh in his nostrils." "Burleigh, you're nothing but a killer." "You should be hanging on the wall... with the rest of the killers." "Killer?" "Me, a killer?" "Yes, you are." "You're a Dr. Jeckyll and a Mr. Hyde... that's what you are..." "a dual personality." "And the good side of your nature... is being destroyed by the bad that's in you." "Oh, that's bad." "You should see yourself as I see you." "Why, when you got off that train..." "I was never so amazed in my life." "You were a totally different character." "And that character is going on and on... breaking people, tearing them apart... just to satisfy your lust." "That's you, Burleigh." "Can't you just see yourself?" "Uh-huh." "That's you..." "the Tiger, the killer." "And I don't want any part of a killer." "I'm through." " Oh, Polly..." " Please." "Wai..." "Uh..." "Ahhhhhh!" "Ahhhhhhh!" "Spider." " I can't fight." " Who told you?" "Never mind." "I'm convinced." "Did you ever hear of Jeckyll and Hyde?" "No." "Well, they're like, uh..." " Amos 'n' Andy?" " No." " Myrt and Marge?" " No." "I'm a dual personality." " No foolin'?" " Mm." "Hey, Gabby." "Gabby!" "Listen, get out of here, you tramp." "I'm a tramp with news." "Listen, I'm trying to put over a big deal... and this guy's trying to tell me that..." " Tiger ain't fighting'." " Tiger ain't fighting'." "What?" " A couple of guys got to him." " What guys?" "A couple of mugs named Jeckyll and Hyde." "They got to talkin' to him, and he ain't fighting'." "I don't understand it." "I tell you, I can't understand it." "There's a curse on the fight or on me or on something." "But I'll lick it despite my blood pressure!" "Hiya, boy." "Well, I just got the news." "So you're not fightin', huh?" "No." "Mr. Sloan, I'm in an awful fix." "Oh, you are, huh?" "Let's get a little air." "You see, I'm two different people." "Why don't you sign for both of them?" "Oh, you can't do that." "Sit down." "Mr. Sloan, this is a very serious matter." "You see, I have a good side and a bad side... a humanitarian and a killer... and the good must kill the bad." "I've got to destroy the Tiger in me." "I have to." "Who gave you that line of..." " Who told you that?" " Polly." "Polly?" "Polly..." "Polly..." "Oh, yes." "Polly." "Smart girl, Polly." "And she's right." "There is a killer in you." "But you..." "you're all confused." "It's the killer in you that's talking." "Why, you're baffled, balled up..." " and bewildered." " I am?" "Well, I'll say you are." "Now, listen, if you do fight... thousands of babies get milk, don't they?" "Yeah." "But the killer in you, the bad side... wants to deprive these tiny toddling tots... of their one chance to enjoy life, limb... and the pursuit of happiness." " Now, imagine I'm your father." " Why?" "I don't know." "You got me there." "I want to help you kill the Tiger in you." "Now, concentrate." "Concentrate as you've never concentrated before." " Think of a baby." " Uh-huh." " Have you got it?" " Yes." "Now think of a bottle of milk." "Have you got it?" "No, the baby's got it." "Did you want me to have it?" "Take away the bottle of milk." "But you just gave it to the baby." "Uh..." "Would it be asking too much... to ask you to take the bottle of milk?" "No." " So, what have you got left?" " I've got a baby." " And he's crying." " No, he's laughing." "Throw in 1,000 babies." "Now, they're all crying." " All but that one." " Throw out that one." "Now they're all crying, aren't they?" "Mm-hmm." " What are they crying for?" " I don't know." "They're crying for milk." "Why can't they have it?" "Because the killer says no." "The killer doesn't want them to have milk." "The killer likes to see babies starve." "But the good you..." "the humanitarian you... he loves babies." "He wants babies to have milk." "You're not gonna let that Tiger lick you, are you?" "Uh-uh." "Because you're fighting for a cause." "And what a cause!" "You're the babies' champion!" "They're all cheering for you." "Yeah." "300, 325, 375, 400." "What a lot of money." "Half for those little kiddies, and half for us kiddies." "Can't you see it all now, honey?" "A million chickens!" "Hello?" "Oh, hello, Burleigh." "Burleigh?" "!" "Ain't he here?" "No, not yet." "What?" "Oh, well..." "Oh." "Well, all right." "He says he's been delayed... but he'll make every effort to get here, though, tonight." "Should we stop selling tickets, boss?" "Now, open up those windows!" "I'll tell you when to stop selling tickets!" "You know, doc... little Agnes is gonna look just like her mama." "That's all that was wrong with her, doc." "She was hungry." "Yeah." "I think she's had about enough." "Better put her away." "All right." "Yeah." "Uh-huh." "There you are." "All right, girl." "In you go." "Oh, I'd better go." "There's a lot of people waiting for me." "No, you can't go." "Yeah, I know... but you got to stay with your mama." "You stay right there." "Yeah, I gotta go over... and win the championship of the world." "I'll be back, uh..." "about an hour, huh?" "No, Agnes, you can't go." "Now, you stay there with mama." "Oh, bless your heart." "I'll be seeing you." "Good-bye, Mama." "Good-bye, Agnes." "No, stay there, now." "Good-bye." "Oh, hello." "I thought you were at the fight." "Oh, I'm all mixed up." "The man that I love... is going to fight my brother, whom I love... and now... now, at the last minute..." "I've got cold feet." "Well, why did you let it go this far, then?" "Oh, it's a long story." "It's a long story... all about a champion being in disgrace... and a brother needing a punch in the nose... and... and you've got to stop it." "Oh, I wouldn't worry, Mae." "Burleigh says Speed will be all right... an hour after the fight." " Oh, he did, did he?" " Uh-huh." "Let me tell you something." "An hour after the fight... they'll probably find Burleigh's head in the 21st row... singing, "I ain't got no body."" "Oh, is that so?" "What about all those men he knocked out?" "Oh, Polly." "Gabby paid them to lay down." "Why, Burleigh couldn't lick anybody." "And tonight, after the fight..." "Say, listen, have you ever seen a fighter... after he's been very badly beaten?" " No." " No, I didn't think so." "Well, they go around and they talk like this." "They don't know what time it is!" "Oh, this is terrible." "Why didn't you tell me all this before?" "Well, I promised Speed I wouldn't interfere... like a dope." "This really does complicate things." "Why?" "You're taking care of all of Speed's money, aren't you?" "Yes, it's in my bank." "Why?" "Well, your account is Burleigh's, too..." " and Burleigh drew it all out." " He did what?" "Yes, he wanted to surprise you." "He took all of Speed's money and bet it on himself to win." "Wait a minute." "Give it to me again." "He took all..." "Never mind." "I heard you." "Come on!" "Hey, driver." "See if you can beat that signal." "I'll make every effort." " Sorry, I couldn't make it." " Yeah, yeah." "Little Agnes!" "Oh, golly!" "Well, come here, baby." "Oh, baby." "What are you doing here?" "For goodness sake, you shouldn't have come over here." "Hey!" "Hey!" "Oh... taxi!" "Open it up right there." "I got..." "Hey!" "Hey!" "I got a..." "Hello there!" "Are you busy?" "!" " Hey, I'm not deaf!" " What's that?" "!" "I said, I'm not deaf!" "Yeah!" "So am I!" "Look, we ought to get together sometime... for a quiet little chat!" "What for?" "Yeah!" "Yeah, that's right!" "You're right!" "Just my luck." "Sammy winds him up in the first round." "Listen to 'em!" "The crowd's yellin' for the main event!" "No foolin'!" "Everything's wrong!" "Yeah, these scales are wrong, too." "We gotta do something." "We gotta stall for time." "What's our angle?" "What's our out?" "I can get in the ring and take a few bows." "Why?" "I got it." "I got it." "We throw in Mrs. Hootenanny." " Meaning me?" " Come on!" "We'll give 'em a little of that stuff... about those tiny toddling tots." "That ought to empty the place." "Nice day!" "He's not only deaf, but he's goofy." "Yeah." "Come on!" "Step on it!" "Step on it!" "What's so funny about that?" "You're a joker, are you?" "I guess this is as close as you can get." "Yeah." "Uh-huh." "We'll get out here." " "We"?" " Yeah." "There's enough for both of us." "Come on, baby." "Come on." "Come on, come on." "That's a girl." "That's a girl." "Come on." "Come on, baby, come on." "It is my privilege to introduce to you... that well-known philanthropist..." "Mrs. E. Winthrop Lemoyne!" "Ladies and gentlemen..." "I thank you for your support in my efforts... to supply milk for those tiny toddling tots." "He's here." "That's it." "Whoa!" "Whoa, Agnes." "Whoa." "That's fine." "Hello, Speed." "Look!" "Here's little Agnes." "Well, where did you get that?" "Oh, I just brought her along for luck." "Well, you'll need it." "Look out, Agnes." "You're heavy!" "What hit me?" "He's here!" "He's here!" "The Tiger's here!" "Yeah, he's been here, too." "What's the matter?" "What happened?" "He hit him in the face with his horse." "Oh, this is brutal!" "I shot that guy last night, but it was only a dream." "Get the aromatic spirit of ammonia." " It's in my bag over there." " Huh?" "Some ammonia!" "Some ammonia!" "Some ammonia, some ammonia..." "Come on, snap out of it, Speed." "Some ammonia." "Somonia." "Somonia, somonia." ""Insomonia."" ""Insomonia."" "Oh, yeah." "Here it is." "Here it is." "Give him a swig of that." "Are you on for action?" "We'll be out in a couple of minutes." "I don't like that stuff." "It'll straighten you out." "I mixed it myself." "Now, get this... we've got to make it look good." "If you win with one punch, they'll know it's a fake." "There's a lot of wise guys around here... that'll be throwing pop bottles at us!" "I've been your manager for a long time." "You've paid me a lot of dough." "If you've ever listened to me, listen to me now." "You've got to make this guy look good for three rounds." "What's the matter with you?" "Nothing." "What's the matter with you?" "Ladies and gentlemen... this is the main event of the evening... fifteen rounds of boxing... for the middleweight championship of the world!" "Presenting a boy who, in the short time of 6 months... has risen to be a leading contender... for the middleweight championship... none other than that Fighting Milkman..." "Burleigh "Tiger" Sullivan!" "Presenting... the middleweight champion of the whole world..." "Speed McFarland!" "Joe Lowry, referee!" "Now, both of you boys know the rules in the boxing game." "I said, both of you boys know the rules in the boxing game." "Mr. Austin, I might just as well be broke the way I am now." "I'll bet you my end of the purse against yours." "Hey, go ahead!" "Well, whatever you say goes, Mr. Sloan." "Come on." "Here, take another shot of this." " Burleigh!" " Polly!" "Mae!" "Burleigh, don't go in there." "You can't fight!" " I can't what?" " They framed you." "Speed is gonna knock you out." "You never could fight, Burleigh." " Oh, yes, I can." " Come on, Tiger." "Snap into it." "Burleigh!" "Suppose she's right." "Suppose I can't fight." "Don't take a dame's word for nothin'." "They never start to think till after they open their mouth." "Just walk right out there and give him that one, two." "She's right." "She's right." "Hey, look." "Here's your good luck charm." "Just hang on to this, and you can't lose!" "Yeah, yeah." "What'd I tell you to do?" " Play around." " Ha ha." "Hey, your glasses!" "Give me your glasses!" " Oh, yes!" " Your glasses!" "Give me your glasses!" "Wait a minute, now, Speed!" "Wait a minute!" "He won't let me!" "Hey, wait a minute." "Take those off." "Can you get my foot out of there?" "Well, hurry up!" "It hurts me!" "Oh, for goodness sake." "I'm doing the best I can." "I know." "Help him out, boys." "Play!" "Play!" "Seven, eight, nine..." "One, two, three... four, five, six... seven, eight... nine... out!" "Gee, Speed." "I'm sorry I hurt you." "I guess I didn't realize how strong I was." "Oh, leave me alone." "Burleigh, before all the press, I'm gonna make you an offer." "If you'll resign from the ring... the undefeated champion of the world..." "I'll make you my partner in the dairy business." "Ohh, that's wonderful, Mr. Aust..." "Uh, Wilbur." "Ha ha." "Say, boy, you've made me mighty happy tonight." "You know, everybody should be happy tonight." "Uh-huh." "Now, Speed here, he's all right." "And then there's sis." "She..." "What about Gabby?" "Oh, yeah." "What about Gabby?" "We gotta do something." "Say, couldn't you make him your general manager?" "He could give the boys up-and-at-'em." "Well, anything you say goes, partner." "But what about Speed here?" "Oh, Speed, he's fine." "He's a wealthy man." "You see, I bet all his money on me." "They gave me three to one, the darned fools."