"In the original version of this film it opened with shepherds sitting in the fields and that the star came by behind them." "And they're sitting, talking and saying, "I like sheep." "Yeah, all sheep." "No, well, most sheep." "Yeah, I love sheep."" "And these shepherds are just boringly talking on about sheep." "And behind them this huge star comes." "And then you see on the hillside, this great light illumine." "And it's clearly the other shepherds being visited by the spirit of God." "And then the lights finally go out." "And they just go on and they turn around and they'd never seen anything at all." "That's like the theme of the movie set really there which is things going on" "At the same time as great historical events are going on someone's hoovering the floor, you know, someone's vacuuming." "These are all people who don't notice gross historical moments are happening." "And that got cut because it was a little long, it was about five minutes of stuff." "And it" " Sort of it tells better very quickly like I just did than to sit through it, but it's really-- I enjoyed it." "Actually, we managed to get the original materials together to reconstruct the scene for this DVD." "I mean, look at that one over there against the sky." "The white of the coat the little black face against the twinkling stars beyond." "Yeah." "Terrific." "Terrific animals." "Little lambs in springtime." "Oh, lambs." "Now you're talking." "They're lovely." "I love them." "Oh, so do I, Morris." "I love them more than anything." "Little white furry bundles." "I think of all God's creatures, sheep have the best offspring." "Oh, yes." "Terrific animals." "Terrific." "Yeah." "They're so sure-footed." "And quick-witted." "Are they quick-witted?" "Yeah, yeah." "Oh, yeah, they're quite quick-witted." "And always cheerful." "Well, except at shearing." "Why are you always on about shearing?" "I'm not always on about it, Morris." "You're a great deflator, you are." "Of all the moments in their little lives, you unknowingly put your finger on the one moment where they lose a little bit of dignity." "Well, I regard that as cheap, quite honestly." "Oh, look." "Look, one of them's looking up at us." "He knows we're talking about him." "Morris, don't get me wrong." "I actually like their behaviour at shearing." "I actually like them when they get a little bit cross." "I find that endearing." "That's the fantastic thing." "They're beautiful to look at, well-disposed quite quick-witted, and yet tough as nails." "You know, I can't think of anything I'd rather do than watch sheep." "The only other animals that I would be remotely interested in watching would be cats." "They don't have flocks of cats." "No, I'm not saying they do, Morris." "Can you imagine a herd of cats waiting to be sheared?" "I heard something over there." "Wolves?" "Could be." "Where?" "Over there." "Right." "Take that, you buggers." "That's not a wolf." "What did you do that for?" "I thought he was a wolf." "You hit him right in the face." "Well, he shouldn't come snooping around like that." "You wait till you hear what we've just seen." "The most incredible thing's happened." "Don't tell them." "We were on the hillside over there when this amazing" "Don't tell them, they broke my bloody nose." "Can't I tell them about the amazing--?" "No." "They said we were to tell everybody." "Not people who break your bloody nose." "Come on." "Where are you going?" "Bethlehem." "Nowhere, good night." "That's right, leave your sheep." "Leave them to the wolves." "Call yourselves shepherds?" "You're a disgrace to the profession." "What a rotten thing to do." "You go and leave those little, helpless furry bundles alone on the hillside." "So they can go down Bethlehem and get drunk." "Is it A.D. yet?" "Quarter past." "Campaign for Free Galilee." "People's Front of Judea." "Officials." "What's your group doing?" "We're gonna kidnap Pilate's wife, take her back, issue demands." "So are we." "What?" "That's our plan." "We were here first." "What do you mean?" "We thought of it first." "Oh, yeah?" "Yes, a couple of years ago." "We did." "Okay, come on." "You got all your demands worked out, then?" "Course we have." "What are they?" "Well, I'm not telling you." "Oh, come on, tell me otherwise." "Answer the" "We thought of it before you." "Did not." "We did." "You didn't." "We bloody did." "You bastards, we've been planning this for months." "Well, tough titty for you, fish face." "Oh, this is a whole other sequence cut which reminds me where Pilate's wife is kidnapped." "And we had this huge guy playing Pilate's wife." "And we all go under the hypocaust." "And we pop up in Pilate's palace and we kidnap Pilate's wife." "And it was like a comedy knockabout scene and that was all cut." "In editing, the decisions were usually made after a screening by a sort of committee of us coming in and making suggestions." "But ultimately the responsibility would be the director and the editor." "But then we'd see-- We'd test how that would work." "So certain scenes were cut and I think with Brian, for the first time, we actually had scenes to cut." "In Holy Grail, what we had was what we got." "I mean, we didn't have anything to cut." "We never" " The budget was so small and we had so few shooting days" "We shot it in six weeks." "that we didn't hardly have enough to make it the length of a film." "With Brian for the first time, I don't know the original length of the cut but we certainly had more material than was necessary." "Stop, please." "Shit." "You stupid" "I don't believe it." "You stupid bastard." "at the mount on Sunday?" "Nay." "Don't push." "Keep the noise down, please!" "Those possessed by devils, try and keep them under control, please!" "All right, now those with gifts come forward, please." "Incurables, you'll just have to wait for a few minutes." "Will he endorse fish?" "You'll have to speak to Chip and Francis about endorsements." "In an odd way Otto was an intrusion rather than a" "It works fine when the space people come in because it's just short enough and mad enough and it's part of the chase to perk you up." "But when Otto came in it was introducing a whole new character." "And what was this about, you know, it's coming from left field." "And it wasn't adding, it was puzzling." "And when we" " You know, we'd always have long, long" " Lots of previews." "And so Otto wasn't just cut out of the blue it was cut because of watching previews and feeling the audience shift and watching." "We didn't ever give them questions, you know." "We didn't fill in forms like they do now." "But you can feel when you're watching with an audience where they get restless and when they start shifting nodding off, you can sense that when you watch a film with an audience." "It was always coming back to us at around that point no matter what we put in there things were starting to nod." "And that's why we'd made some cuts because often cutting lets you drive through to the end quicker." "They could see which way we're going." "And that the plot is building and that made it work better, I think." "No, no, no." "I can see you do not believe me." "No, no, I do." "Enough." "I'll prove it to you." "Squad." "Hail, leader." "It was interesting because when we shot it it was only 10 days after Jonestown." "And it's about a fully-trained suicide squad who can commit suicide within 20 seconds." "And it was about rampant nationalism and how dangerous that is to all of us in any society." "And so Otto was a complete, you know, fascistic figure of the nought century, whatever that's called, the first century." "And there were Otto songs too." "There was about three Otto songs which were done." "About Otto's leaders." "Following Otto because he's mad and bad." "Has a small piece of brain lodged in his skull." "I have those on tape somewhere." "Yeah, I mean this is less sketch format and we did make a lot of choices that tried to maintain the narrative at the expense of sketches." "The Otto scene is one of those which is a wonderful scene but it came too late in the film to introduce new characters." "I'm never certain whether we were right or wrong, to be honest because I don't know if our stuff depends on a narrative thrust or just good, comic scenes one after another." "Always the problem is when you're making a film over 90 minutes somewhere in the middle of a comedy film it just" " Nothing works." "And so we trimmed it down and decided to try to keep the narrative moving." "One of the great things in the design was trying to make these costumes where we used the Star of David crossed with a swastika." "I thought that was a really interesting design problem." "One that would cause offence to a lot of people." "But I thought we succeeded and that's" "You only see it at the end of the film." "And trying to build uniforms for them." "It was all very strange." "It was sort of these strange samurai things made out of reeds." "But the helmets had a certain Nazi shape to them." "The whole concept of Otto was interesting where you basically take a radical Jewish revolutionary who has all the same dreams that young Adolf had." "So that's what it was and it's hard, tough comedy and it makes a very strong point." "But in the end, you'd say, "Well, do we really wanna offend all these people who are gonna misunderstand what the point is?" "Is that really our target here in this movie?"" "And it isn't really." "The movie's target is really about Christianity and its sects and its followers and its ability to go to war over peace, which is the great irony, you know." "We are the god of peace and we'll kill you if you don't believe everything we say." "So that's the Otto story." "And it's all my fault." "You lucky, shabby bastards." "It is the sign." "The sign that is the sign?" "Yes." "Men." "Our time has come." "Our leader calls." "Men forward." "Oh, my cock." "He had you there, mate, didn't he?" "That'll teach you a lesson." "There was a scene, I think towards the end where Michael sold souvenirs, crucifixion souvenirs which was very similar to Harry the Haggler scene and it was one or the other and it was considered that that scene was just too close to the end." "You wanted to get through to the end." "Well, how about this, then?" "A couple of crosses." "One slightly damaged." "Only very" "I love sheep." "So do I. Terrific animals." "Terrific." "No trouble." "No, no trouble." "Well, except at shearing." "They can play up a bit then, can't they?" "Yeah." "But I love that sort of little burst of frenzy they have then, you know?" "I like it when they get a little bit angry." "Shows they're human." "Oh, yeah, I'm not saying I dislike them at shearing, you know." "But they can be a bit of a handful, can't they?" "So would you be." "You find a great pair of scissors snipping away while someone holds your back legs apart." "You wiggle a bit, you kick out a bit of a fuss." "Yeah, I'm not just saying I expect them to stand around in the fields and nibble the grass and look a bit pretty." "I'm not saying that." "Oh, but they are pretty, aren't they?" "Oh, yeah." "I mean, look at that one over there against the sky." "The white of the coat the little black face against the twinkling stars beyond." "Yeah." "Terrific." "Terrific animals." "Little lambs in springtime." "Oh, lambs." "Now you're talking." "They're lovely." "I love them." "Oh, so do I, Morris." "I love them more than anything." "Little white furry bundles." "I think of all God's creatures, sheep have the best offspring." "Oh, yes." "Terrific animals." "Terrific." "Yeah." "They're so sure-footed." "And quick-witted." "Are they quick-witted?" "Yeah, yeah." "Oh, yeah, they're quite quick-witted." "And always cheerful." "Well, except at shearing." "Why are you always on about shearing?" "I'm not always on about it, Morris." "You're a great deflator, you are." "Of all the moments in their little lives, you unknowingly put your finger on the one moment where they lose a little bit of dignity." "Well, I regard that as cheap, quite honestly." "Oh, look." "Look, one of them's looking up at us." "He knows we're talking about him." "Morris, don't get me wrong." "I actually like their behaviour at shearing." "I actually like them when they get a little bit cross." "I find that endearing." "That's the fantastic thing." "They're beautiful to look at, well-disposed quite quick-witted, and yet tough as nails." "You know, I can't think of anything I'd rather do than watch sheep." "The only other animals that I would be remotely interested in watching would be cats." "They don't have flocks of cats." "No, I'm not saying they do, Morris." "Can you imagine a herd of cats waiting to be sheared?" "I heard something over there." "Wolves?" "Could be." "Where?" "Over there." "Right." "Take that, you buggers." "That's not a wolf." "What did you do that for?" "I thought he was a wolf." "You hit him right in the face." "Well, he shouldn't come snooping around like that." "You wait till you hear what we've just seen." "The most incredible thing's happened." "Don't tell them." "We were on the hillside over there when this amazing" "Don't tell them, they broke my bloody nose." "Can't I tell them about the amazing--?" "No." "They said we were to tell everybody." "Not people who break your bloody nose." "Come on." "Where are you going?" "Bethlehem." "Nowhere, good night." "That's right, leave your sheep." "Leave them to the wolves." "Call yourselves shepherds?" "You're a disgrace to the profession." "What a rotten thing to do." "You go and leave those little helpless furry bundles alone on the hillside." "So they can go down Bethlehem and get drunk." "Is it A.D. yet?" "Quarter past." "Campaign for Free Galilee." "People's Front of Judea." "Officials." "What's your group doing?" "We're gonna kidnap Pilate's wife, take her back, issue demands." "So are we." "What?" "That's our plan." "We were here first." "What do you mean?" "We thought of it first." "Oh, yeah?" "Yes, a couple of years ago." "We did." "Okay, come on." "You got all your demands worked out, then?" "Course we have." "What are they?" "Well, I'm not telling you." "Oh, come on, tell me otherwise." "Answer the" "We thought of it before you." "Did not." "We did." "You did?" "We bloody did." "You bastards, we've been planning this for months." "Well, tough ticket for you, fish face." "Why are you--?" "Brothers, brothers, we mustn't fight each other." "Surely, we should be united against the common enemy." "The Judean People's Front?" "No, no, the Romans!" "Oh, yeah." "Well, yeah." "Yeah." "Yes." "Yeah, he's right." "Let's go in, get her out, and we can argue afterwards." "All right." "Promise." "Yeah." "Solidarity." "Solidarity." "Let's go then." "I got her." "I got her." "Quick." "I got her." "I" "She got me." "Help, she got me!" "She" "Stop, please." "Shit." "You stupid" "I don't believe it." "You stupid bastard." "at the mount on Sunday?" "Nay." "Don't push." "Keep the noise down, please!" "Those possessed by devils, try and keep them under control, please!" "All right, now those with gifts come forward, please." "Incurables, you'll just have to wait for a few minutes." "Will he endorse fish?" "You'll have to speak to Chip and Francis about endorsements." "Now, don't line up along there." "Get them in two rows, Reg." "Hail, leader." "What?" "Oh, I'm so sorry." "Have you seen the new leader?" "The what?" "The new leader." "I wish to find him and hail him." "Hail, leader." "See?" "Who are you?" "My name is Otto." "Otto?" "Why, of course I'm patient." "You know, to see the leader that has been promised our people for centuries." "The leader who will save Israel by ridding it of the scum of non-Jewish people." "Making it pure." "No foreigners, no riffraff, no Gypsies." "Otto." "What, the leader?" "Hail, leader." "No, no, it's dangerous." "Danger?" "There's no danger." "Men." "Impressive, eh?" "Yes." "Oh, yes." "We are a thoroughly trained suicide squad." "Oh, yes, we can commit suicide within 20 seconds." "Twenty seconds?" "You don't believe me?" "Yes." "I think you question me." "No, no, no." "I can see you do not believe me." "No, no, I do." "Enough." "I'll prove it to you." "Squad." "Hail, leader." "Commit suicide." "See?" "Yes." "I think now you believe me, yes?" "Yes, very impressive." "I think now I prove it to you." "Yes." "All dead." "Not one living." "He's dead." "And he's dead." "See, I tread on him, he's dead." "And he's dead." "And he's dead." "They're all dead." "All dead good Jewish boys, no foreigners." "But their names will live forever." "Helmut." "Johnny." "The little guy." "And the other fat one." "Their names will live, eventually, forever." "Wait a minute." "There's somebody here who's not dead." "There's somebody here who is only pretending to be dead." "Stand up, you." "Who said "ow"?" "You're not dead either." "Neither are you." "Stand up." "Stand up." "You're not dead." "Oh, my heck." "Stand up." "Stand up, all of you." "Oh, my heck." "Is there not even one dead?" "No, sir." "Not one." "Why not?" "We thought it was a practise, sir." "But all the bleeding and the groaning." "Little secreted sheep's bladder, sir." "Oh, my cock." "Sheep's bladders?" "You are sour." "A non-Semitic, mutinous, racially-impure cloth-eared bunch of Roman lovers." "Sorry, sir." "Tomorrow, for the punishment you will all eat pork sausages." "Oh, no." "No." "All right." "Tell the leader that we are ready to die for him the moment he gives the sign." "What sign?" "The sign that is the sign." "That shall be the sign." "Men forward." "Silly bugger." "You lucky, shabby bastards." "It is the sign." "The sign that is the sign?" "Yes." "Men." "Our time has come." "Our leader calls." "Men forward." "Oh, my cock." "He had you there, mate, did he?" "That'll teach you a lesson." "Souvenir of Calvary?" "Very nice little item, this." "Wrap it around a lamp and the crosses twinkle on and off." "Very nice, doubles as a table cloth or a curtain." "No." "Totally wash" "Oh, probably active again, eh?" "Well, how about this, then?" "A couple of crosses." "One slightly damaged." "Only very"