"Précédemment..." "Just putting some of these things in storage." "Until me and God work some of our issues out." "You talked to Cappie?" "What about?" "You." "We're looking for a new usher, if you know of anyone." "I know a guy." "Hey, I'm Lana." " How do you two know each other?" " Fight club." "Well, before Nate left, he told me that you and some guy in an Iron Man Audi told him to stay away from me." "Evan has an Iron Man Audi." "I'd rather hang out with Iron Man." " She offered me an internship." " In new york." "I can't believe that you're going." " I'm sorry." " Well, I'm sorry too." ""What are you wearing, Lord Doom?"" ""My imperial cloak of darkest evil." "Commando style." "And you?"" "So that's when I said, "Polymer?" "I barely know her."" "Good one." "Rusty and..." "Jordan?" "For a second I thought Jordan realized what a horrible mistake" " she made quitting school..." " Is that Dale?" " I thought you broke up." " We did." "We're just catching up." "Isn't technology great?" "I, myself, may have actually started a little cyberliaison dangereuse of my own." "It was getting NC-17 in there." "You know, as an atheistic former virgin," "I'm free to pursue every urge and desire." "It's practically expected of me to be loose with my morals and my genitals." "Can you please not talk about your genitals in front of my girlfr..." "My friend." "You know." "It's OK." "I have to run, go get lunch with people." "Bye, Jordan." "People?" " Who?" " Some people I met in my building." "You've been there a week and you already made friends?" "That's great." "Yeah, they're so much fun." "Marci is a film student." "She's super creative." "And Kelly is an intern at a PR firm." "And there's Eric." "And Kelly's roommate Jane is in urban planning." " She's hilarious." " That's great." "So Eric..." "Is he like, the fun gay guy in the group?" "No, Eric's straight." "Is this weird?" "Do you not want to hear about this?" "No, it's fine." "It's not like this is a long-distance relationship." "I said that wouldn't work and you agreed." "So do you wanna do this again, like next week?" "Sure." "Next week's great." "It's great, yeah." "OK, bye." "Sounds like somebody's having a good time." "Speaking of a good time, vampira69 awaits." "The coffee dates have been great." "I think we're in a good place now." "That's exciting!" "So Fisher's officially off probation?" "Once again, he is a full citizen of the united states of Ashleigh!" "It's like the whole kissing Rebecca thing never even happened." "I'm happy for you guys, it's so great when..." "There he is!" "Get down!" "Get down!" "What?" "Is that Cappie with him?" "That's Sam from Theta Pi." "Can we please take a break from our daily stalking?" " Staking-out." " Stalking of Cappie and Evan." "Why do you care so much anyway?" "How could I not?" "It's Cappie and Evan." "If they're hanging out and protecting me from Nate types, I want to know." "Do you think they could be friends again?" "Well, if they are, why did Cappie say that Nate was wrong?" "Why all the secrecy?" "That's what I'm trying to find out." "Wait, where did Evan go?" "We're on the move!" "Let's go!" "Do you even take classes here anymore?" "Are you heading out with cleaning supplies?" "I'm staying in." "Getting a jump on spring cleaning." " Isn't that what pledges are for?" " It is, yes." "But we..." "We're teaching by example." "You know what they say:" ""Cleanliness is next to godliness."" "And you don't want to piss off God!" "Anyway," "I've been thinking lately." "A lot." " Do you remember dry weekend?" " Barely, yeah." "Did we really eat cheesaritos and whipped cream?" "We sure did." "Do you remember how you said that you and Cappie talked about me?" "Case, like I said before," " I didn't mean to mess you guys up." " I know." "I'm just wondering how it all happened." "I mean, did he approach you?" "Did you approach him?" "I hope you're not over-analyzing this whole thing 'cause, God, I wish I hadn't said anything." "It just seems like an awfully personal conversation to have between two guys who hate each other." "Cappie and I were really drunk." "You know how booze works." "One minute you're fighting, the next minute you're best friends." "The minute after that you're puking and then back to fighting again." " And that's it?" " And that's it." "Sorry, Case." "I need to show these pledges how to use a broom, so..." "Happy sweeping." "She already has friends in New York?" "What, do they sit around Central Perk and talk about what to name Rachel's baby?" "Stop torturing yourself." "You're the one that ended it" " because of the long-distance thing." " I know." "It was the right decision." "Yeah, well, maybe you should stop talking for a while." "I mean, you're just making it harder for yourself to move on." "Any relationship over a computer is not real." "Tell that to Lord Doom." "My virtual relationship with vampira69 is real." "No relationship is perfect!" "Look at you and Grant." " Why?" "Because we're gay?" " No, not at all." "I'm an atheist now, I say," "Do 'em if you got 'em." "I meant the sneaking around." "That's not exactly ideal." "I don't really like it, but at least we took our relationship to the next level, if you know what I mean." "Do 'em if you got 'em." "How about you both get out there and meet some real live girls?" "Let's go out tonight." "I guess it is my duty to bump uglies in RL Now." " That's "have sex in real life."" " I got it." "Thanks." "C'mon, Rusty." "Yeah, let's drop it like it's hot with some shawties." "All right." "Let's do it." "When did you become T-Pain?" "I'm going through a lot of changes." "So..." "What do you wanna do tonight, boyfriend?" "Well, I don't know, what do you want to do, girlfriend?" "That..." " sounded weird, didn't it?" " Yeah, it did a little bit." "It has to be something awesome for our first date as a back-together couple." "How about the Ohio River Comic-Con, in Cincinnati?" " Yeah, that sounds like fun." " I was kidding." "Comic books and Cincinnati?" "We could..." "Go ice skating?" "We could, but I just went with some of the sisters last week." " Right." "Yeah, I knew that." " Yeah." "Oh, my God." "Clueless is playing at the Titan." "I've never seen it in a theater!" " You hate that idea." " No." "No, I've actually never seen it." "You've never seen Clueless?" "And you're a film major?" "I thought CRU had a good program." "You're right." "We should go." "Let's go." "Great." "So should I just meet you at the theater?" "Or I could pick you up here." "That's what we used to do before, right?" "Right." "Just like it used to be." "We might have a problem." "I know, you missed a spot, Chambers-maid." "We can't pay our respects tomorrow night to the cremated remains of the original amphoras in a dirty lair." "No, no, I'm talking about Casey." "I think she's on to our secret friendship." " She talked to you, too?" " Yeah." " She tried that on me at Dobler's." " So, what should we do?" "Do you think we should just tell her things are different between us?" "Down here they are." "Down here?" ""Down here it's our time."" "Goonies, nice." "That line holds up." "I can see myself in your 200-year-old walnut." "You know what they say:" ""cleanliness is next to godliness."" "And you don't wanna piss off God." "It was a joke?" "Yes, I took a well-known phrase and I spun it..." "Explaining it doesn't make it any funnier." "Anyways, these amphoras seem to take this whole secret society thing really seriously." " They will kick us out." " Rules are rules." "Right?" "We just keep denying." "Casey'll have to give up eventually." "It's a text from our mutual friend." ""Evan told me everything." "Meet me at the stairs at eight to discuss."" "She'll give up eventually?" "Pesky times call for pesky measures." " I'm so ready." " We're gonna tear it up!" "Check it out." "Streetwalker fishnets, at your nine o'clock." "I thought I felt some hungry eyes." "It's just 'cause I'm gay." "Trust me, gay guys go over bigger than glow sticks in the club world." "No offense, r-man, I think you're cramping my style." " I'm gonna go in, OK?" " Excuse me, fellas." "Get out of here." "I don't know about this, calvin..." "Your friend over there said I should come say hi." "He's my gay friend." "I'm not gay, though." "I love girls." "And I can prove it to you." "No, thank you." "Impressive." "So I guess you got my text?" "You can't tell anybody." "I knew it!" "Why all the secrecy?" "If our enemies find out that me and evan are vigilante crime fighters who protect the people of cyprus from the dark forces of evil and corruption, we'll be so screwed." "You're messing with me." "There's my partner now." "Reclusive boy billionaire evan chambers." "He's so good at pretending he's mad at me, I almost believe it myself." "Tell casey that we're a stealth crime fighting team." "Wha..." " That is hilarious." " Really." " Did you put him up to this?" " OK, I get it." "Come on, she knows." "Let's use that." "She could be the gwyneth to our robert downey!" "The michael caine slash morgan freeman slash katie holmes slash maggie gyllenhaal to our christian bale." " You can stop now." " Yeah, get out of my way, crappie." "Guys, come on!" "Oh, my gosh!" "Guys..." "Guys!" "Come on, guys!" "Stop!" "So, what'd you think?" "Are you kidding?" "What'd you think?" "I'm just gonna say it." "I think cluelessis one of the greatest movies in the history of movies." "That's is what I was thinking." " Really?" " Yeah, absolutely." "The music and the clothes and the Make-overs, come on, it's a classic." "I have the greatest idea." "You should show it at your film club." "At my film club?" "Clueless, it's a great idea." "Yeah, I could pitch it at tomorrow night's screening." "We're watching this old ingmar bergman classic, wild strawberries." "You should totally come." "Only if you want to." "OK." "No, I love old movies." "I've seentootsie, twice." "What do you wanna do for dinner?" " I could go for some pizza." " Anything but pizza." " Let's do pizza." " Are you sure?" " Absolutely." "I love that idea." " OK, me, too." "So maybe electric rage was the wrong step into the single world for you." "I'm not so sure there's a right step." "Come on." "We gotta keep getting you out there and you'll be moving on from jordan before you know it." "What was that?" "Vampira69 just told a twilight joke that would make your ears bleed." "I thought it was your duty to have sex." "You can't have sex with a computer." " Not real sex, face-to-face." " It's pronounced "f2f"." "And I know, but that's about to change." "Vampira69 just told me she wants to meet in person tonight, at the, ohio river comic-con in cincinnati!" "Tonight?" "Let's all go." "Maybe the problem with the club was it just wasn't your crowd." "Dude, comic book conventions are crawling with hotties." " Everybody knows that." " Yeah." "No, they don't." "We're talking skin-tight cat suits, man." "Skin-tight." "With great power, comes great responsibility." "See?" "Dork talk." "They are gonna love you." "It was like the most polite date ever." "At one point, I thought fisher and cover a puddle for me." "Didn't you take him off probation?" "I did." "So why does it feel so off?" "You guys will find your rhythm." "Don't worry." "At least you weren't beating the crap out of each other." "Right, the big kt-omega chi brawl." "Give me details." "I heard someone pulled a shiv." "There was no shiv-pulling or pushing." "Wait, what's a shiv?" "Whatever." "All my sleuthing made them hate each other more." " I'm like the worst detective ever." " Stop it." "Remember inspector gadget?" "He needed a dog and a ten-year old girl to solve anything." "I just really wanted it to be true." "Why?" "Is this about cappie?" "It's clear there are still feelings there since every time you're around him you turn into the female hugh grant." "How I feel about cappie is kind of irrelevant since he's off with that fight club girl." " And what about evan?" " We're friends." "And that's what I wanted all of us to be, like freshman year." "When evan and cappie and I hung out together, it was..." "Everyone was happy." "And my ugg boots were still in style." "It was a good time." "Maybe someday you three will get that back." "Regardless, I owe them both a wildly humiliating apology." "There's a qa via satellite with q from star trek." "Not bad, cincinnati." "Is that the guy who reads the bible to you before you go to bed?" "I'm excited for q." "Not god." "Are you nervous?" "I'm just going over some opening lines so I'm ready when I meet somebody." "Yeah, we're just on the road." "I'm here with rusty and dale." "Rusty say hi to grant." "That's sweet." "Yeah, I Miss you too." "Are you going to comic-con?" "Yeah." "Are you?" "Guess it's pretty obvious." "Find me there, OK?" "Lord doom is ready for comic-con!" "Yeah!" "Comic-con, baby!" "Case, got your text." "Just making sure there's no omega chi waiting to ambush me this time." "I think you're safe." "I got you a beer to make up for my meddling." "In that case, that case meddling forgiven." "How're you feeling?" "Nothing a little drinking won't heal." "I can't believe that I thought you and evan could be friends again." "Yeah, a little bit of a hair-brained scheme there." "Me and chambers?" "Not gonna happen." "Way too much baggage." "It would've been nice, though, if I were right." "Don't you Miss freshman year?" "The three of us, hanging out in the dorm." "It was fun." "It was pretty fun." "But, the past is the past." "You can't change it, and you can't go back." "I guess so." "You gotta keep moving forward, right?" "How are things with lana?" " Good." "She's cool." " She seems cool." "I'm happy for you." " Thanks for the beer." " You off?" "To sweep some chimneys?" "I was just doing a little tidying up at the kt house." "Cleaning?" "At kt?" "Has that ever happened before?" "First time for everything." "You know what they say:" ""cleanliness is next to cappie-ness."" "And you do not want to piss off Cappie" "See ya." "Oh, my god." " Nice." " That's how it's done." "Guys." "Everyone decent?" "To what do we owe this... obscenely large fruit basket?" "We are delivering fruit baskets to every house on campus." "Just a little ZBZ good well for what seems like the longest semester ever." " No cheesaritos?" " No." "Sorry." " Enjoy!" " Thank you." "Do we just play around it?" "Like putt-putt?" "I really can't believe you talked me into this." "What makes you think they're not gonna look inside the basket?" "The only fruit the KTS consume is used to flavor vodka." "Can you believe I fell for that fight?" "They must've told their houses to fake the fight to throw me off the scent." "Diabolical." "You sucking suck-sucker!" "That seems a little needlessly complicated." "And a tad egotistical on your part." "Why are kittens called kittens?" "They're little cats." "Shouldn't they be called cattens?" "So this is what fraternity guys talk about when no one's listening?" "Do you think Ashleigh was acting a little strange?" "Whatever." "She's hot." "I'd do her." "That reminds me, the other day this guy at dobler's was telling me that 80 percent of college kids have sex in any given year." "Can you believe that?" "It's nothing compary the fact One out of every two pregnancies in america are unplanned." "What do you expect when half of unmarried men who have sex never wear a condom." "They know!" "They know!" "Get down!" "We just sounded fancy!" "your butt crack's showing." "Never mind." "I'm gonna go." "Why don't you come with me to fisher's film club?" "We're watching movie called strawberries gone wild, or something." "You go." "I'm gonna stay here and wait for cappie." "Have fun." "and good luck with your..." "...crazy." "ok, boys." "Gotta run." "I will meet you later at dobler's." "Later." "Seventy-five bucks for spock ears?" "Nerd-sploitation is what that is." "I don't think I've ever seen so many comic-obsessed fans in one place before." "I just need to find one." "Vampira69's waiting on lord doom." "I've got no intention of disappointing a 500-year-old blood-sucking should we be concerned that" "dale's taking this super-villain thing a little too seriously?" "She's wearing green alien makeup." "It can't be that hard." "Oh, hey, wait, there she is!" "Excuse me." "Oh, I'm sorry." "hey." " Leopard boy!" " Leopard boy?" "It was my favorite tv show growing up." "His mom is human but his dad is a leopard, and he solves these mysteries at this posh caribbean resort." "They've gotta have a booth here." "I'll be right back." "Come on." "We made first contact." " Wow!" "That was..." " Amazing?" "Bergman is a genius!" "I know, the allusions to freud and german expressionism in the opening dream sequence, it was just awesome!" "What'd you think about it, ash?" "What did I think of the movie?" "Um, I thought it was very..." "Honestly, I was so bored for a minute I thought" "I couldn't breathe." "How is that even possible?" "It's probably the greatest film in cinema history." "I wouldn't say that." "Right, fisher?" "Name one film that even comes close." "Uh,clueless?" " Is that godard?" " Silverstone." " Is she kidding?" " No." "Fisher agrees with me." "We think it's one of the greatest movies ever made." "Right, fisher?" "Uh..." "Yeah, I thinkclueless is, uh..." "Colorful, with a really great..." "Spirit, and it has a very interesting use of montage." "And it also evokes the, uh, nuance, of early screwball comedy." "Hey, who wants pizza?" "I do!" "I'm meeting my internet girlfriend here." "I mean, not really girlfriend." "More like sex partner, but you know." "How much are the sticky buns?" "Lord doom, are you ready to submit?" "Vampira69, we meet at last." "Dale?" "Sheila!" "You're vampira69?" "Is this a joke?" "Did you know it was me?" "No, no, of course not!" "Although given the tawdry yet imaginative scenes of debauchery you typed," "I suppose" "I should've guessed." "Maybe there's a reason we were brought back together." "Maybe it's all part of god's plan." "I don't really believe in that anymore, but..." "And you hurt me, sheila." "Sorry." "Think you could find a way to forgive me?" "And if not me, vampira69?" "I still can't believe you found me." "There's a lot of green girls." "I'd already introduced myself to two aliens and a shrek." "I'm Rusty Cartwright, by the way." "Falitza." "I'm a Borgton from the planet Lycon." "My friends call me Sally." "So where's Sally from?" "I assume not Lycon." "You assume correctly, Rusty." "I'm from Adamsburg." "I go to school in Cyprus!" "We're ten minutes away, that's great." "My last relationship ended because of long distance." "You're not planning on moving to New York anytime soon, are you?" "New York?" "No." "That's not..." "No." "Don't worry." "I just mean, if this were to progress into a relationship, it'll be easy for us to sleep at each other's places." "Do you have a car?" "Great." "I don't." "My sister does, but she hardly ever lets me use it." "She's cool though." "You'll really like her." "If you meet her." "I'm not saying that..." "you will meet my family." "Oh, my God." "Well, that was weird, wasn't it?" "Sort of." "It was nice to meet you, Rusty." "Have fun at Comic-Con." "Did you walk into a door?" "Yeah, that really got out of hand, right?" " It worked on Casey, right?" " Yeah, I talked to her." "Trust me, she doesn't suspect a thing." "No more suspecting, that's for sure." "I knew you were secret friends!" "Oh, my god, I'm awesome!" " How did you find this place?" " I followed Cappie from KT." "What?" "I used my super secret sneaky route." "Yeah, and I almost puked three times in the sewer tunnels, but I made it!" "I've so many questions for you." "How long have you been friends?" "What is this place?" " You need to hide!" " Casey, hide." "Hide?" "From who?" "Quiet, incessant question girl!" "Hide now and everything will be explained." " We should get started." " Yeah!" "We're here tonight to pay homage to our amphora fore-fathers." "Amphora." "It's time to bring out the ashes of the original amphora members." "Retrieve the burial urn." "You don't..." "I think it..." "Who is she?" "I'm..." "You're Casey Cartwright?" " He did it." " He did it." "Guys, you totally broke the trust!" "I can't believe this but" " we're going to have to banish you." " Brett, no, we can explain..." "Sorry." "Fellow amphora brethren." "Since you two obviously can't handle a simple" ""secrecy until death" rule..." "Don't blame them." "It's not their fault." "I'm just really clever when it comes to investigating..." "Quiet!" "I have... no idea what to do with you." "She's the first intruder in the history of amphora." " Like I said, really clever." " You should stop." " Sorry." " Thank you." "Certain ancient aboriginal tribes would sacrifice those who intruded on a holy plot of land." "I don't think it's come to that, but thank you." "Amphoras, minus the trust-breakers..." "Let's consult!" "So this is why you guys were keeping it a secret." "Exactly." "Now you might get kicked out because of me." "Don't worry about it, Case." "No way you could have known." "Yeah, but I could've stopped trying to be" "Nancy freaking Drew and minded my own business." " We won't argue with that." " I'm gonna Miss this abandoned water pumping station." "OK, guys." "We've decided  not to report you to the alumni." "You both can stay in amphora." "Thank you." "As for you, intruder, being the first to find the lair is an impressive feat." "We've decided to let you in to the amphora society." "Really?" "Are you guys OK with this?" " Totally great." " Totally." "It'll be awesome." "You must first perform the amphora emotional purge." "You will stand before us and share your secrets, your truths, everything." "Everything?" "So I guess I'll see you tomorrow?" "Why didn't you tell me you didn't like Clueless?" "I don't know." "I guess I just feel like" "I have to walk on eggshells around you now." "I mean, have you felt completely normal since we got back together?" "Excuse me, sorry." "Not completely." "But we're fine now." "Old Ash and Fisher, picking up where we left off." "It's not that simple, I mean, I feel like if I make a wrong move, you're gonna put me back on probation," "or break up with me." "I'm over what happened." "I wouldn't have taken you back if I didn't want to." "That's great, but it doesn't change the fact that..." " I can't feel comfortable." " You don't feel comfortable because you're not being yourself." "Which sucks, 'cause the person I want to be with is you." "The old you, the person who wasn't afraid to say what he was thinking." "Yeah, I just spent 40 bucks on this hat." " Don't judge me." " How can I?" "Falitza from borgton thought I was too weird to have a relationship with." "Wait, relationship?" " You just met her." " You know what I mean." " Nice leopard boy hat." " From the man in the cape." "What happened with vampira69?" "Funny story." " She turned out to be Sheila." " Our landlady?" "Yeah, she wants to put her grill all..." "She wants to do it again." "Rusty's hook-up didn't go so well either." "I'm thinking about taking her back..." "And her front." "You can't get back with the landlady." " Tell him, Rus." " What's wrong with going back?" "Maybe Sheila's the only right person for Dale." "Maybe he made a huge mistake letting her go." "He should do everything to get her back." "You've got your facts wrong there, Rus." " She did me and dumped me." " He's not talking about Sheila." "Who are you to give relationship advice, anyway?" "Come on." "You can't even be honest with your brothers about your relationship with that Grant." "What does this have to do with me?" "This is about you being afraid to put yourself back out there and date again." "I don't want to put myself back out there!" "I had the perfect girl and I let her go." "Why?" "Because long-distance can't work?" "Says who?" "I made a mistake, and it is not too late to fix it." "Jordan and I can make this work." "Well, that covers the summer after high school." "My friends and I made a pact never to go back to lake Galena or that rest stop on route 93, ever again." "Let's see." "I started CRU in the fall." "That's where I met Evan and Cappie at the big KT rush party." "Fast forward!" "We know about that." "I'm fast forwarding." " Cappie and I started to date..." " Keep it moving," "I'll just skip ahead to the night of the all-greek ball." "Evan and Cappie got into a fight that ended their friendship." "I've always felt responsible." "They were truly great friends, an unstoppable duo." "And I never got over the fact that it was me who stopped them." "But we have a chance to get back to what we were freshman year." "We're three years older now, maybe wiser." "Evan and I found a way to get past bribery and corruption." "Cappie found a way to move on to Lana." "Even after Evan told me about Cappie at the end of the world party, coming to see me..." "What?" " You told her about that?" " It was no big deal." " Yeah, Cap, I did, but I was..." " He was high." "Totally baked." "He was trying to eat shampoo." " Come on, what do you want me to say?" " Nothing." "If that's even possible." "Can you hear me?" "I think we made a mist..." "I think we..." "Thank you for your patience." "We will begin shortly." "Please have video chat." "Rusty, hey, finally!" "What's up?" "Remember before you left I said long-distance relationships can't work?" "I was wrong." "A lot of people have long-distance relationships." "And I think we can, too." "There'll be plenty of time to rekindle our carnal flame after we see the opponent spiritual and sometimes malevolent counterpoint." "Our QA with Q aka John de Lancie will begin momentarily." "Just as soon as we finalize our satellite feed." "Why should we give up on a great relationship just because we live in different cities?" "We can have internet dates, and cook the same meals." "Rent the same movies online and watch them at the same time." "Fall asleep next to the computers." "Sounds like somebody could use a little self-esteem." "It'll be like you never left." "Almost." "And we will never have to be single again." "I miss you." "I miss you, too." "It sounds like you miss being in a relationship more than you miss me." "Come on, that's not it." "Falling asleep on a keyboard?" "That's not a relationship." "I don't think you want that." "And I know that I don't." "What was that?" "Where are you?" "Who's that on our screen?" "What is going on here, Josh?" "I told you, all problems taken care of before I get on the damn line!" "This is an abomination!" "About that night, I was leaving the party to come see you, but I..." "It's fine." "You don't have to explain it to me." "That was..." "That was the pot brownie talking, it wasn't me." " I wish I could take it back." " Less talking, more not talking." "I get this is why you were keeping all this from me." "Because I might screw it up and, apparently, you were right." "I thought if the two of you could be friends again, then maybe we could all go back to the way things used to be." "But I guess I was wrong." "We can't go back." "But maybe all three of us can try to move forward together." "I can try." "Fellow amphoras, it is time to resume the ancestry ritual." "We can try." "But this is your place down here." ""down here, it's our time." wow," " gooniesreally does hold up." " So good." "I really appreciate you guys letting me in, but I don't belong in the amphora society." "I really think a sacrifice is an effective way..." "We're not gonna kill her." "Just drop it!" "You've purged all of your deepest, darkest secrets." "If you ever reveal anything about the amphora society, it will go public." "you understand?" "Understood." "The events of this evening will remain secret." "That was humiliating." "It wasn't that bad." "She told me to get a life in front of people who live in their parents' basements." "It sucks it didn't work with you and Jordan." "She was super hot." "I tried to warn you." "I know." "I feel pretty bad about what I said about you and..." "That grant?" "We do need to take our relationship to the next level." "And I need to stop moving for a little while." "I tried to turn an impractical relationship into something rather than start over, just because I hate the search." "The search is the worst." "I'm done with it." "I'm going back to what gives me the most pleasure." " You don't told Sheila to take a hike?" " I did." "I'm talking about god." "Q brought me back." "I was clinging to this notion of me as this sexy atheist super-vilain." "But that's not me." "I mean, I'm sexy, but I'm not an atheist and I'm not a super-villain." "I'm Dale Kettlewell." "Let's get out of here." "I don't think I can spend one more minute at comic-con." " Does leopard boy have a theme song?" " I don't think so." "Come on." "Sing it for us." "I'll get you started." "Who's got spots?" "I got spots" "I got spots..." "I can't believe he couldn't be honest with me about a stupid movie." "Maybe it can't be like it was." "Maybe." "I thought you said tailing cappie led nowhere." "You're putting your friendship theory to bed, remember?" "I know." "I am." "Cappie and evan will never be friends again." " What's wrong?" " You can't cook." "Leg warmers are not gloves." "And duringclueless," "I literally gagged twice and pretended that I had popcorn caught in my throat." "That was way harsh." "But you do have really cute toes and the most amazing laugh." "And I am gonna try really, really hard to make the new ash and fisher even better than the old one." "Me too." "Who you toasting?" "Just raising a glass to the party gods." "Look at those jackasses." "We should go finish what they started." "No, easy, bro, easy." "Those douche bags aren't worth the trouble."