"I'm not used to getting hit on very much." "A few years ago, when I cut my hair really short, this girl asked me out to dinner, and it wasn't until she got her hand, like, way up my leg that I started suspecting something was up." "For the record, it did not turn me on." "It just tickled." "I should have shaved." "Anyway, after getting used to Zaboo's bolder statements of interest," "I can't really tell if the stunt guy was into me or not." "I should shave my legs just in case." "Oh, no!" "That might jinx it." "I should do it anyway, but..." "Being a girl is so much work!" "Ow, one." "I embrace the tiger within me." "Ah, two." "I am predator, not prey." "I am the god Shiva, the god of masculinity and destruction." "Okay, that's enough." "Yeah, Vork, the Internet is basically telling me everything I need to know about becoming a man." "Number one... buff it up." "When Codex sees my curves, she's gonna be enamored." "Oh, man." "Back when she was 12, she used to have a huge crush on Dolph Lundgren in He-Man." "Now it's my turn." ""I haf zee power!"" "I never realized how awesome it is being a man and doing man things with other men." "Another reminder, "re:" this morning, men only shower together if there's more than one shower." "I.e., a gym, not a residence." "10-4." "Besides that little bump, though, we're basically having the time of our lives." "300 gold, 300 gold..." "Damn it!" "I just got killed again!" "I swear I'm being stalked!" "This ganker, Teats4Tots, seems to know every detail of my schedule!" "Look, I've mapped out the kill pattern on the game atlas using a borrowed NASA simulation program." "Same places each time!" "Sucks." "Hey, let's you and me go wrestle!" "Or shoot things." "Javelin, archery, golf anything phallic, some kind of phallic sport." "Men!" "Let's do chest bumping!" "Please, don't." "Don't." "Don't." "Oh, boy..." "After you're done gathering, like, 200 blood mushrooms for my orb quest, make sure to polish off that calc homework I faxed you." "It's due in the morning." "Oh, you know, I could come over and deliver it into your hot little hands myself." "And I could bring the homework, too." " Bladezz!" " Ciao, Balla." "What's going on?" "Why is Bladezz doing homework for you?" "Oh, hey." "He thinks he's gonna get a virtual lap dance out of it, but all he's really gonna get is a trouser tent and maybe a "Best Wishes" e-card." "Tink, you shouldn't flirt with him to make him do stuff for you!" " That's... gross!" " You're one to talk!" "Dangling your carrot crotch out for Zaboo to lure him into Vork's crack shack." "He was stalking me from my own apartment." "Something had to give." "So, you made him think he had a chance with you to get what you want." " Gee, sounds familiar." " No!" "It's... different." "It's not, but don't feel guilty about it." "You're done with him." "Codex, men are meant to be used for their skill sets." "Need to pass a biology test?" "Date a biologist." "Or your biology T.A." "They don't even need names, as far as I'm concerned." "Fred, Joe, and Ryan might as well be called" "Moving Van, Pharmacist, and Oil Change." "You just have to pick the right tool for the right job." "And believe me, they're all tools." " Are you for real?" " Yeah." "Oh, the stunt man's home!" "He drives a motorcycle." "Go, go!" "And I need to hear the whole combat log, in detail!" "Yeah, but we're in the middle of clearing this orc cave." "The two-headed King M'angoroth is right there, so..." "Codex, sometimes getting laid is more important than killing an Orc King!" " Go!" "And be confident!" " Okay." "If I get rejected, what's the down side?" "I'll cry a lot." "I'll probably do that anyway." "Confident." "Dude, is a cat dying in here?" "Just kidding." "Sorry!" "Was I too?" "Oh, my God!" "What happened to your face?" " What?" "Oh, my face!" " Yes, your face!" "I just got off the set from my latest flick, Necrotic Fury." "Today I played the main bad-ass Zombie." "Big action sequence." "First, I jump off this car, and the guy attacks me to the right, so I bash him in the face." "Another guy comes and attacks me to my left." "I duck under, punch him in the stomach," "Natabam." "Spin hook." "Then he tries to stake me, so I pull a Matrix move." "I duck underneath, he goes for my legs," "I aeriel over it, jump up, knee him in the face, and start eating his brains out." "Upshot is, I get killed by a blowtorch to the face." " Flick is gonna be tight, though." " Awesome." "Okay." "Well, I can't really look at you right now, so, um, you know, good-bye!" "Did you ever make your appointment yesterday?" "Oh, God." "Um..." "I just have this game I play online." "It's nothing important." "You had an appointment for gaming?" "No, no, I didn't say that." "That would be weird." "Right?" "Pretty much." "Gaming is for fat guys who live in their mom's basements." " Soft and doughy when I punch them." " Right." "You're so right." "My roommate's got a console, though." "You should come by and check it out." " I'll just watch and check you out." " Oh." "Ew." "Okay." "Maybe later, when I can't see your entire eyeball." "It's just makeup." "Come on and touch it." " No, no." "I can't do that." " Oh, come on, it's cool." "No, it's, ugh..." "Oh!" "Ooh, it's soft and stuff." "Sorry." "Sorry."