"(THEME SONG PLAYING)" "I have in my hand four envelopes from the office of admissions at the University of Pennbrook." "You robbed our mailboxes!" "Hey, it's a federal offense." "I am so proud of you." "I'm in." "I did it!" "I'm in!" "(ALL EXCLAIMING)" "(LAUGHS)" "(SIGHS)" "Oh, well, I..." "I guess not everybody can get in." "But I did." "(ALL EXCLAIMING)" "All right." "Why don't you go now, Cory?" "I'm in!" "I'm in!" "Those idiots let me in!" "Whoo!" "All right, all right." "Wait, wait, wait." "We got one more to go, and let's not lie." "This is a toughie." "Shawn, no matter what happens, I love you." "I'm ready." "CORY:" "Okay." "Wait list!" "(LAUGHS) All right!" "What?" "I'm on the wait list, so if they don't get filled up with all the people that they've already accepted," "I get in." "But the plan was for all of us to go to school together." "What's the big deal?" "We're always gonna be friends." "No, no, no." "Everyone says that." "And then they graduate from high school, and they never see each other again." "Could that happen?" "I'm getting you into Pennbrook." "Wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "You're telling me that you got in to New Jersey Turnpike Community College, and you're going to Pennbrook?" "That's crazy!" "Look, everybody in my family went to Pennbrook." "Topanga." "Could you help us out for a second?" "In your opinion, which school is better?" "Turnpike or Pennbrook?" "Any school's better than Pennbrook." "Pennbrook's yucky." "And what do you know about the Pike?" "I would never go there." "And why not?" "Well, I hear they have a promiscuity problem." "Really." "Yeah." "Pike girls are way too easy." "They never want a commitment." "You go from girl to girl every day." "And they talk about shallow." "You know, I didn't know any of this." "I gotta go think." "I can't believe I'm helping you do this." "I feel dirty." "No, no, no." "You're not helping me, Topanga." "You're helping Shawn." "Do you really think you can kick people out of Pennbrook to make room for him?" "Do you know how crazy you are?" "Barry!" "Bud." "Did you think about what we talked about?" "Oh, think about it, man, I am doing it." "I am turning down Pennbrook and going to Tahiti for six years." "Barry, Pennbrook gave you a full scholarship!" "Yeah." "When I told my dad, he took a swing at me." "(LAUGHING)" "Cory, I know you want us all to be together, but if it's meant to happen, it will." "Oh, it's meant to happen, Topanga, and if it's not meant to happen," "I'll make it meant to happen." "Craig." "Have you heard about today's Army?" "I've convinced so many people not to go to Pennbrook that you and I are gonna be the only guys there." "You're exposing my photographs." "Hey, it's dark in here." "That's why it's called a darkroom, college boy." "Come on." "I've only been here three weeks." "You want to get me fired already?" "No, listen." "After you graduate from Pennbrook, my friend, your boss is gonna be working for you." "(EXCLAIMS) Come on." "I'm just on the waiting list for college, Cor." "You know, I'm not waiting for anything here." "Jonathan's already got me developing my own pictures, you know?" "Doin' good." "But then, Shawn, this is just a hobby, okay." "You can take these kind of courses in college." "I might not get in." "You want me to be smart?" "I'm smart to consider other options." "What other options?" "Cool." "What?" "My picture." "It's finished, and it's good." "What do you think?" "I think you haven't listened to a thing I've said, Shawn." "Duckies!" "(SIGHS)" "Come on, Alan." "If we pick out the wallpaper together, it'll be more fun." "It's not fun." "It's torture." "I've told you a thousand times, woman, I'm no good at this." "Wallpaper is your business." "Duckies!" "Well, I'm not doing it without you." "It'll only breed anger and resentment." "Just tell me which one you like best." "Duckies." "Okay." "This one." "No!" "Was that duckies?" "No." "Garbage." "Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Matthews." "Ooh, wallpaper!" "Fun!" "ALAN:" "So!" "Two weeks till graduation." "How are you two holding up?" "It's exciting, but it's scary." "No, it's not scary." "What's there to be scared about?" "Hey, for me it was like jumpin' off a cliff." "Now, you see, duckies are good because not only do they give you that nonthreatening sense of security, but you can feed 'em crackers and you can ride 'em." "See, duckies are the horsies of the ocean." "No." "I mean, they are." "Okay, somebody explain to me about duckies before I hit him with a spoon." "It's wallpaper." "It's adorable." "It's for your room." "For my room?" "Duckies rule!" "You see, I had duckies when I was growing up." "I..." "I turned out fine." "It's for the baby." "But don't worry." "We won't re-duck-erate till you move out." "(ALL LAUGHING)" "Wait a minute." "Wait a minute." "Who..." "Who said I'm moving out?" "I mean, I will when I go to college, but can we slow down for a second?" "I..." "I sort of thought that you guys would keep my room the way it is." "Actually, Cor, for that, I think you have to be unexpectedly killed by a truck or something." "Cory, everything's gonna be okay." "No." "I..." "I know it's gonna be okay." "It's always been okay, Topanga." "I know we're all gonna go to college together." "We're all gonna live here in the same town." "We're all gonna have the same jobs." "We're all gonna take vacations together." "And we're gonna die together and be buried next to each other." "If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go to Chubbie's to be in my regular booth, my regular place, to have the usual." "That's good." "Everything's getting better." "I'm getting happy." "You know, we're all together." "I'm getting a burger." "Everything is good." "Well, you know what else is good." "Tell him the good news, honey." "No more part-time job." "My boss says that after I graduate, he wants me to be his full-time assistant." "That's great, Shawn!" "Yeah." "That's the big news?" "Tell 'em what else." "This came in the mail today." "Yes!" "Is it from Pennbrook?" "Yes!" "You did it!" "You're in!" "We are all together forever." "Well, wait." "Let's not get carried away." "We don't know what's in the letter." "No, no, no." "I know what it says because I know what it has to say." ""It is our pleasure to inform you" ""that due to our latest enrollment figures," ""you have been moved off the wait list" ""and are officially accepted into Pennbrook University."" "(ALL EXCLAIMING)" "Yes!" "The enrollment figures." "That was me." "I fixed 'em." "That was me." "Oh, God, I am so proud of you." "Thanks." "She meant Shawn." "What'd he do?" "Wow." "I did it." "I actually got into college." "This is a big day." "This is the biggest day, Shawn." "See, Topanga, I told you." "Everything is gonna work out." "Ladies and gentlemen, can I have your attention for a second?" "My best friend, Shawn Hunter..." "I think I'm gonna take the job." "...is throwing away his entire life." "I'm just saying I need time to think." "No thinking!" "Barry is on his way to Tahiti because of you." "You are going to college!" "You're not my father, Cory." "If I was your father, Shawn, I'd spank you!" "Because that's what you deserve!" "A big spanking!" "Now, take down your pants!" "Topanga has some news." "Right, Topanga?" "This is probably a bad time." "Topanga got a letter from Yale." "If you don't go to Pennbrook, we are finished." "Don't worry, honey." "I don't even know if Yale accepted me yet." "I was talking to Shawn." "What are you talking about?" "Go ahead." "Open it." "I applied to Yale when Cory and I broke up." "You know, you have a chance to have a real future here." "Not because I really wanted to go." "I just wanted to see if I could get in." "To get the kind of education where you do not have to talk about exhaust manifolds for the rest of your life." "'Cause, you know, with my GPA being so high and my boards being so, well, high..." "You deserve more, Shawn, okay?" "Give yourself a chance." "Give me that." "Here's your food." "Not hungry." "Not my problem." "Still have to pay." "Shawn." "I need time to think, Cor." "You made the wait list, kid." "Nice going." "I think I'll give the check to..." "You." "Gee." "I really thought I'd get in." "Cory, I feel awful." "You feel awful?" "About what?" "Not getting into Yale." "Yale?" "Shawn could never get into Yale." "I mean, you could hardly get into Yale." "What?" "What is the most important thing in a young man's life?" "Education." "And what is Shawn about to do?" "Stop his education." "And it's your job as Shawn's older brother to what?" "Fix this?" "Why?" "Because he knows all your tricks and he's sick and tired of listening to you." "Now, go get him." "Okay." "What do we got?" "You've got the Nikon loaded with Tri-X, and the Hasselblad's ready for the close-ups." "Mmm." "Perfect, Shawn." "You're learning fast." "Keep this up, I'm gonna be working for you." "(CHUCKLES)" "I'll get to you in a second." "The most important thing in a young man's life is education." "Now, as Shawn's older brother," "I'm not gonna stand by and watch him throw his life away." "I appreciate what you've done for him, but he's young and impressionable, and I'm not." "Have you ever modeled?" "No." "Why do you ask?" "Yes!" "Yes!" "Good!" "Good!" "Good!" "Oh!" "Now." "Wistful." "Oh." "You have done this." "You have done this before!" "(CLICKS) Perfect!" "Thanks for bringing me this guy." "He's gold." "Do you do angst?" "(CAMERA CLICKS)" "Excellent!" "Shawn, go see if Terri's ready." "Right away." "Shawn." "Shawn." "Yeah." "Let me ask you something." "As your friend..." "As your best friend, just tell me why you would consider giving up everything for this." "How do I look, Shawn?" "Uh..." "Come here, Terri." "Perfect." "You're the best." "Stop." "(CHUCKLES)" "I'm waiting for an answer." "Cory, I like working here, and I'm good at it." "You know?" "They treat me with respect." "I make a good paycheck." "And I'm learning a lot." "Every single day, I can't wait for school to be over so I can come here and learn more." "I've never felt that way about high school, so I'm sure I'm not gonna feel that way about college." "I've found something here, Cor." "Well, you sound like you've already made your decision." "Yeah." "I have." "But thanks for the advice." "You know, I'm not gonna give up on this, Shawn." "(LAUGHS) Of course you're not." "What am I going to college for?" "To get a good education, to get a good job, to make good money, to get one girl to hang all over me that looks like this." "And here I have two." "I'm staying." "Gosh." "What are you..." "I have a doorbell." "(RINGS DOORBELL)" "Yes?" "You're my last hope." "I need you to talk to Shawn." "As a matter of fact, I was just on the phone with him." "Oh, thank you." "I told Shawn I support his decision." "You what?" "I gave him my blessing." "What are you, the Pope?" "Mr. Feeny, Shawn and I are supposed to go to college together." "We're supposed to be roommates." "Well, I'm sorry, but things change, and not just for students." "You know, why can't you ever just say what you mean?" "Why does everything that you say have to have some hidden explanation?" "Cory..." "Cory, I'm retiring." "What do you mean by that?" "Well, the school board is offering early retirement, and I've decided to take it." "But Mr. Feeny, you love teaching." "Without teaching, you're not Mr. Feeny." "You're just crazy George, the guy next door." "There comes a time when making a change feels right." "I'm thinking about moving to Jackson Hole, Wyoming." "I'll spend my time reading, fishing." "Who knows, I might even become crazy George of Jackson Hole." "You know, I can't believe you're doing this." "(STUTTERING) I mean, what did you guys all do?" "Did you all get together and decide to ruin my life?" "Cory." "Everything will be all right." "Hi." "I don't like the sound of that." "This came from Yale." "Dear Cory, the Ivy League is pleased to announce the further disintegration of your world." "Congratulations, Topanga." "I mean that." "How did you know I was accepted?" "Because I know the way my life works." "Mom and Dad sent me out to see if you were okay." "Are you?" "Well, I've been better." "How about you?" "(SIGHS) I've been better, too." "I got a 67 on my history test." "Listen, Morgan, you're not going to do anything silly, like not go to college and get a job, are you?" "No." "You're not going to have a baby, or go to Yale or retire to Wyoming?" "I'm still a little girl, Cory." "(SIGHS) God bless you." "You know, this has been my booth since before you were born, Morgan." "In fact, I was sitting in this very booth when they told me I had a baby sister." "So this place means a lot to you, huh?" "It's the last place left that makes any sense." "Cory, you're going crazy." "No, no, no." "The world is going crazy, Morgan." "Everything is changing so fast that I just want to be in the one place I can count on with the one person I can count on." "You, Morgan." "I'm having a great time with you, too, Cory." "Ahoy, mateys!" "And now it's over." "What'll it be?" "We'll have two Chubbie burgers, two fries, and two root beers." "Two buccaneer burgers, two treasure taters, and two root beers." "Why are you talking like that?" "And, Maria, what are you wearing?" "Please don't tell him." "Oh, my gosh, you don't know." "Please don't tell him." "Don't know what?" "Everything's changed." "Chubbie." "You've been sitting here for over three hours." "Chubbie!" "He moved to Jackson Hole, Wyoming." "Hey, wait a minute." "Oh, could you at least scoot over to this barrel over here while the workers pirate-ize your booth?" "Oh, yeah, right." "Like it would take just a few seconds to change a booth where my girlfriend and I reunited eight different times." "To change a booth where my best friend Shawn and I dressed up like women to prove a point or something." "I forget." "So I doubt very much, missy, that you can change that much history in just a few seconds." "Wrong again." "So where is the little guy?" "Ah." "Morgan, I ask you to get help and you bring him?" "I was worried about you." "You were acting like a psycho." "Hey, it's about time this place got some class." "Anybody want to split a couple of buccaneer burgers?" "Oh, I get it." "It's pirates." "You know, Eric, I just..." "I've worked so hard and so long to keep everything together." "You know, what am I supposed to do, just sit here, smile, eat a buccaneer burger, and pretend everything's okay?" "You're scared of change, huh?" "You know, I went through that same thing when I first graduated from high school, but that's why I took a year off before I went to college." "You didn't have the grades to get into college." "I'm talking here." "Sit down." "Good things are happening to your friends, Cory, and you need to be happy for them..." "Or else what kind of friend are you?" "Okay, matey, you're the first to walk the plank." "Let me know how it is." "You know, if I take a bite of this, it's like Chubbie's is just a memory." "It's like everything's changing." "And we don't know what's going to happen." "Just taste it." "Oh, no." "It's good." "Hey, what happened to Chubbie's?" "Well, guys, it's not Chubbie's anymore." "It's Peg Leg Pete's." "We've got to do something about..." "Never mind." "Here, Jack." "Oh, no, no, no." "I have a modeling career now." "Beef goes right to the hips." "All right, guys." "Sit down." "We need to talk." "Cory, about the letter from Yale..." "I was just really excited about getting accepted, but, I want to be with you, Cory." "Topanga, I want to be with you, too." "But this is Yale we're talking about, you know." "You can't just give that up." "And I accept that." "Good for you, Cory." "But Cory, Yale's in..." "I don't care if Yale is on the other side of the moon." "Nothing is going to keep us apart." "And, Shawn..." "I still think you're making the biggest mistake of your life." "But I accept it." "Thanks, Cory." "I'll try to make you proud." "There's going to be a lot of changes in your life, Cory." "It's not the changes that matter, it's how you react to the changes." "I mean, that's what makes you who you are." "Then I even accept that Feeny's retiring." "(YELLS) What?" "He's moving to Jackson Hole." "Here in Philadelphia?" "No, in Hawaii, you incredible, unbelievable moron." "Feeny can't do that." "How can Feeny do that?" "I mean, I need him." "He's my mentor." "I go to him for everything." "Hmm." "Why are you not more upset about this?" "Hey, things change." "Mr. Feeny!" "Dude!" "Regretting this immediately." "What?" "There's a gnarly curl, bra." "Let's go get tubed." "All right, here I go." "So, what's with the bitchin' board, bro?" "Hey, I'm coming with you to Jackson Hole, surfing capital of the world." "Come on, grab your stick." "Let's jam." "Eric, do you have any idea where Jackson Hole is?" "Sure do." "Hawaii." "It's in Wyoming, you macadamia nut." "Do they surf in Wyoming, Mr. Feeny?" "No, Mr. Matthews, they don't." "Well, what do they do in this Wyoming?" "Well, they take the time to enjoy God's beautiful landscape." "They stop to appreciate their quiet surroundings and contemplate on what life is all about." "It sounds like a nice place." "Yes, it is." "Mr. Feeny?" "Hmm?" "If I'm really, really quiet, will you stay?"