"Live from the Dolby Theater at Hollywood and Highland, it's the Oscars." "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome your host, Seth MacFarlane." "Thank you so much." "Thank you very much." "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." "Welcome to the Oscars." "And the quest to make Tommy Lee Jones laugh begins now." "There we go." "I honestly cannot believe I'm here." "There's a billion people watching." "That's insane." "I'm hosting the Oscars." "An honor that everyone else said no, it really is." "From Whoopi all the way down to Ron Jeremy, it eventually found its way to me." "Now, tonight for the first time the Oscars have a theme." "We will be celebrating music in film and have a lot of great surprises coming up." "But first and foremost, a lot of great films this year, a lot of great films." ""Argo", who saw "Argo", right?" "Great movie." ""Argo" tells the previously classified story about an American hostage rescue in post-revolutionary Iran." "The story was so top secret that the film's director is unknown to the academy." "They know they screwed up." "It's not your fault." "You know, 2012 was a great year for movies." "Hollywood shattered box office records with $10.8 billion in domestic sales, in fact, studio accountants have never had to work harder to prove nothing made a profit." "Now, theoing to be a big night for some of you people because as we all know winning an Oscar guarantees a long successful career in the industry." "You're ahead of me on this." "Look at last year, Jean Dujardin won best actor for "The Artist"." "Now he's everywhere." "I'm kidding, of course, his is actually a tragic age-old Hollywood story." "It couldn't make it in the talkies." "And it's a big night for foreign films." ""Amour" is nominated." "Right?" "Or as I call it "this is 90" and some Hollywood royalty." "Some Hollywood royalty." "Roman Coppola nominated for best screenplay for "Moonrise Kingdom"." "He is the sixth member of the Coppola family to receive a nomination." "Now, that's got to be a fun house to grow up in, right?" "Mom, I got an "a" in Spanish." "Oh really, literally everyone you're related to has an Oscar." "Daniel Day-Lewis is here, of course." "Daniel, your process fascinates me." "Now, you were totally 100% in character as Lincoln 24/7 during the movie." "That's what I read, like," "You stayed in character all day every day so like if you saw a cell phone, would you have to be like, oh, my God, what's that?" "Like if you bumped into Don Cheadle on the studio lot did you try to free him?" "I mean, how, how deep does your method go?" ""Django Unchained", now, that was an intense film." "Right." "This is the story of a man fighting to get back his woman who has been subjected to unthinkable violence or as Chris Brown and Rihanna call it, a date movie." "Ooh, no." "No, that's what we were afraid he would do." "That's as bad as it gets if it makes you feel better." "It's not as bad as it gets really." "A lot of controversy, a lot of controversy over the multiple uses of the "n" word in the film." "I'm told apparently the screenplay is loosely based on Mel Gibson's voice mails?" "Is that..." "Is that..." "Right?" "Oh, so you're on his side?" "Okay." "I'm told it's actually okay for Quentin Tarantino to use that word because he thinks he's black." "Jennifer Lawrence has a great attitude about this whole thing." "This is a charming, talented woman." "I was talking to her backstage." "She told me whether she wins or loses it's just an honor that Meryl Streep wasn't nominated." "As I said, tonight's ceremony is being watched by close to a billion people worldwide, which is why Jodie Foster will be up here in a bit to ask for her privacy." "Also... what the hell is going on?" "Enterprise to dolby theatre, come in." "The Dolby Theatre." "This is Captain James T. Kirk." "From Star Trek." " Will you respond?" " Captain Kirk, what are you doing here?" "Well, I'm here to stop you from doing what you're about to do, the show is a disaster." "What are you talking about?" "It's going fine." "No, it's not." "Listen to me, I've come back in time from the 23rd century to stop you from destroying the Academy Awards." "This is the newspaper headline from tomorrow morning" "Seth MacFarlane, worst Oscar host ever." "It's that bad?" "Your jokes are tasteless and inappropriate and everyone ends up hating you." "Why couldn't they just get Tina and Amy to host the show?" "Tina and Amy should host everything." "I'm sorry." "They'll be hosting next year." "Tell me what it is that I do wrong." "Well, to begin you sing an incredibly offensive song that upsets a lot of actresses in the audience." "What's the song?" "I'll show you." "I brought a recording of the Oscar telecast back in time with me." "You'll be able to see exactly how you ruin the ceremony." "Look at this." "We saw your boobs" "We saw your boobs" "In the movie that we saw, we saw your boobs" "Meryl Streep, We saw your boobs in "Silkwood"" "Naomi watts in "Mulholland Drive"" "Angelina Jolie, we saw your boobs in "Gia"" "That made us feel excited and alive" "Anne Hathaway we saw your boobs in Brokeback Mountain" "Halle Berry, we saw them in "Monster's Ball"" "Nicole Kidman in "Eyes Wide Shut" Marisa Tomei in "The Wrestler," but" "We haven't seen Jennifer Lawrence's boobs at all." "We saw your boobs" "We saw your boobs" "In the movie that we saw We saw your boobs" "Kristen Stewart, we saw your boobs in "On the Road"" "And in "Monster" we saw Charlize Theron's" "Helen Hunt we saw them in "The Sessions"" "Scarlett Johansson, We saw them on our phones" "Jessica Chastain, We saw your boobs in "Lawless"" "Jodie Foster in "The Accused"" "Hilary Swank in "Boys Don't Cry" Penelope Cruz in "Vanilla Sky"" "And Kate Winslet in "Heavenly Creatures" and "Jude"" "And "Hamlet" and "Titanic"" "And "Iris" and "Little Children"" "And "The Reader"" "And whatever you're shooting right now." "We saw your boobs We saw your boobs" "Ladies and gentlemen, the gay men's chorus of Los Angeles." "We saw your boobs" "Boobs" "We saw your boobs We saw your boobs, boobs" "We saw your boob" "just so you know, I'm not actually a member of that chorus." "I was just joining in at the end there." "Oh, trust me, in July you join the chorus." "Okay, what do I do?" "How do I fix this?" "Well, look, look, these people don't want you to mock the movies." "If you're going to do a son, sing one that celebrates the movies." "You know, a classic Oscar-winning tune." "You said it yourself." "That's what tonight is supposed to be about." "All right, I think I got it." "Ladies and gentlemen, Channing Tatum and Charlize Theron." "Someday when I'm awfully low" "When the world is cold" "I will feel a glow" "Just thinking of you" "And the way you look tonight" "Just the way you look tonight" "Just the way you look tonight" "All right, there." "Did that fix everything?" "Well, let's find out." "Seth MacFarlane, pretty bad Oscar host." "Seth MacFarlane, pretty bad Oscar host." "Still?" "Why?" "What else happened?" "You do a reenactment of the movie "Flight" entirely with soft puppets." "Take a look." "Flight 227, you are cleared for takeoff." " All systems go." "Captain." " Okay, hang on a second." "Glug, glug, glug, glug, let's do it." "Captain, you don't look so good." "Are you okay?" "I am now." "Oh, oh." "Aaagh!" " I'm going to have to roll it." " Too low." "Too low." "Pull up." "Pull up." "I'm in so much pain." "Hey, it's me your drug dealer." "You want some drugs?" "Yeah." " Yeah." "Yeah." "Yeah." " Yeah." "Yeah." "Yeah." "I mean, that's..." "that's not bad-bad, right?" "Are you crazy?" "You're a white guy." "In 2013 you can't wear black hand." "Come on, Denzel doesn't care." "He has a great sense of humor." "He's in all those "Nutty Professor" movies." "He's hilarious." "The point is, keep it classy." "You've sang a song." "How about a little soft shoe?" "Okay, all right." "How about this?" "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Daniel Radcliffe and Joseph Gordon-Levitt." "Just what makes that little old an" "Think he'll move that rubber tree plant" "Anyone knows an ant can't move a rubber tree plant" "But he's got high hopes" "He's got high hopes" "He's got high hopes He's got high apple pie" "In the sky hopes" "So any time you're feeling low" "Instead of letting go" "Just remember that ant" "Whoops, there goes Another rubber tree" "Whoops, there goes Another rubber tree" "Whoops, there goes Another rubber tree plant" "Ker-plop" "All right." "That did it." "That had to have done it." "What does the headline say now?" "Seth MacFarlane proves to be mediocre host." "It helped but still not enough." "Seth MacFarlane proves to be mediocre host." "That's actually the best review I've ever gotten so I'm going to go ahead and take that if that's okay." "Are you sure you want to be the first Oscar host to get a bad review?" "Fine, fine, what else do I do that screws up the show?" "Well, you're incredibly disrespectful to one of the evening's most prestigious nominees, look at what happens in the green room." "Hey, how's it going?" " Oh, my God." " Isn't this cool? "Flying Nun"." "You know who is a fan of the "Flying Nun" in this room?" "This guy." " Really?" " Me." "That's great." "Thanks a lot." " I saw "Lincoln"." " Oh." "Thanks." "I wasn't complimenting you." "I was just saying I saw the movie." "Oh." "You know, when I was a kid I used to watch "The Flying Nun" on TV and I got to tell you I'm not ashamed to say, you were so hot." "Wow." "That's very nice of you to say that." "And "Gidget" you as Gidget, oh my God, so hot." "Don't you have to get back on stage or something?" "No, Adele is out there screaming her song at everybody." "I'm fine." "I'm good." "Something about the nun, man, there's something about the nun, I don't know whether it's cause it's forbidden fruit, so ridiculously hot." "This is making me uncomfortable." "What are you doing in about 61/2 hours after the show is over." "I'm going to go to a party or something." "Great." "I'm in." "Cunt me in, man." "Fire up the transam." "I can't go anywhere." "I'm not nominated." "You have to go back out there." "You know they're gonna go it to Anne Hathaway." "Let's..." "Lets's go." "Yes, but out of respect, I think I have to..." "Look, I got a bottle of wine and some Boniva." "We'll have a great time." " Give to it Ally." " They're not gonna give it to Ally." " Amy." " I don't know who that is." " Jacki." " No." " They're gonna give it to Anne." " Yeah." "I went home with Sally field." "That's awesome." "No, no, it's not." "Sally was supposed to win." "She wasn't there to get the award." "What happened?" "Amy Adams ran up and grabbed it." " She did?" " Yeah." "They tried to take it from her and she bit a guy." " Oh, my God." " Blood all..." "Look, you're almost there." "You got to give them a big showstopper." "Make your audience feel welcome and then start the show." "Okay." "All right." "I think I got it." "Orchestra, please." "Be our guest" "Be our guest as we honor all the best" "With a telecast designed to put your patience to the test" "There's Joaquin, look at his threads, We hope he's on his meds" "Daniel Day, we love the beard, But Lincoln's voice was kinda weird" "Have some luck," "With the star that made them look like a vision" "We're missing Oscar time so be our guest, be our guest be our guest" "Please be our guest" "Best Oscars ever, says everyone except Entertainment Weekly" "Ladies and gentlemen," "Last year's Oscar winner for actress in a supporting role," "Octavia Spencer." "The five actors nominated for actor in a supporting role have been nominated a combined 21 times for academy awards." "And each has won at least once before." "Now, I'm no expert." "Having been here on this stage for the first time last year, but in my opinion, this may be one of the most impressive field of actors to share this category." "Here are the nominees for actor in a supporting role." "Alan Arkin, "Argo"." "Want to set up a movie." "You want to lie to Hollywood." "A town where everybody lies for a living." "Then you going to sneak 007 into a country that wants CIA blood on their breakfast cereal and walk the Brady Bunch out of the most watched city in the world." "Robert de Niro, "Silver Linings Playbook"." " I want to you watch the game with me." " I do but this is..." "I'm not superstitious." "That's a small thing I do." "If I make a lot of money what is the difference if I do this or that?" "That?" "A small thing." "Hey, you see that?" "You're meant to be here." "This is special." "Everything happens for a reason." "Philip Seymour Hoffman, "The Master"." "What scares you so much about traveling into the past, Sir?" "I'm not..." "Are you afraid we might discover our pasts have been reshape, perverted" "and perhaps what we think we know of this world is false information?" "Tommy Lee Jones, "Lincoln"." "Even you, Pendleton, who should have been gibbeted for treason long before today even worthless unworthy you ought to be treated equally before the law." "Christoph Waltz, "Django Unchained"." "I show that to the authorities proving that indeed have killed him at which point the authorities pay me the bounty." "So like slavery it's a flesh for cash business." "And the Oscar goes to..." "Christoph Waltz, "Django Unchained"." "This is the second academy award and second nomination for Christoph Waltz." "He took home his first Oscar in the same category for his role in "Inglourious Basterds"." "Thank you." "Thank you so much." "Mr. de Niro, Mr. Arkin, Mr. Hoffman and Mr. Jones... my wish..." "My unlimited gratitude goes to Dr. King Schultz." "That is, of course, to his creator and the creator of his awe-inspiring world, Quentin Tarantino." "And I thank Jamie Foxx and Leo Dicaprio," "Sam Jackson and Kerry Washington." "I thank Harvey Weinstein and Amy Paschal, Stacey Sher," "Reginald Hudlin and Sill Lahr Savone," "Adam Schweitzer, Lisa Costello and I thank my friend" "Jeffrey Dashnaw and Bill Clark who saved my neck." "We've participated in a hero's journey, the hero here being Quentin, you scaled the mountain because you're not afraid of it." "You slay the dragon because you're not afraid of it, and you cross through fire because it's worth it." "I borrowed my character's words." "I'm sorry." "I couldn't resist." "Thank you." "We'll be right back with Paul Rudd, Melissa McCarthy, Reese Witherspoon and five members of "The Avengers" cast when the Oscars return on ABC." "Welcome back to "The Oscars"" "He is the star of "This is 40" and she's the star of "Identity Thief"." "See if you can tell them apart, Paul Rudd and Melissa McCarthy." "An actor..." "An actor's... voice." "An actor Camille Yoon." "From that lone voice a thousand characters can emerge." "Emerge!" "For example," "I'm a robot named ping and I just want to learn how to swim." " Wow." "Wow." " Thanks." "Where's Paul Rudd?" "I dont know." "Don't hurt me, bear, I'm just an inner city mouse with a lisp." " Really incredible." " How did you do that?" "I don't know." "So you began a lot of animation work?" "No." "Actually, no." "I changed my... an e-mail so I'm figuring it's, you know, it's all going to compiling in." " When they figure it out and stuff." " Yeah." "You probably are... oh, no, no, my phone has been acting all weird." "Like a tower change.." "Maybe." "It could be a tower change." "You never know." " With all this technology, the phones..." " What?" "Here are the nominees for the best animated short film." ""Adam and Dog", Minkyu Lee." ""Fresh Guacamole", Pes." ""Head Over Heels", Timothy Reckart and Fodhla Cronin O'Reilly." "Maggie Simpson in 'The Longest Daycare", David Silverman." ""Paperman", John Kahrs." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Paperman", John Kahrs." "This is the first academy award and nomination for John Kahrs." "Thanks to the academy, especially this year they got the shorts out to all the nominees." "To everyone at Disney." "Particularly John Lassiter and Andrew who have been great at revitalizing the studio to Christina Reed, my producer, the cast and crew and everyone who helped on it." "They made it so much better than I could ever hope." "To my wife, the amazing Jenny Rim and to my kids," "Ben and Johnny, I'll see you tonight." "Bye." "And here are the nominees for the best animated feature film." ""Brave", directed by Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman." ""Frankenweenie", directed by Tim Burton." ""Paranorman", directed by Sam Fell and Chris Butler." ""The Pirates!" "Band of Misfits", directed by Peter Lord." ""Wreck-it Ralph", directed by Rich Moore." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Brave", Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman." "This is the first academy award for Mark Andrews and Brenda Chapman." "Mark previously nominated for the animated short film "One-Man Band"." "Okay." "I just happen to be wearing the kilt." "I didn't plan any of this." "I'd like to thank the academy for this incredible honor." "Making a movie has its own story." "I'd like to thank John Lassiter," "Jim Morris, Andrew Stanton, Pete Docter, Brenda Chapman," "Katherine Sarafian for the making of "Brave" an exceptional story." "My wife and my four kids, Maeve, Jack, Peyton and Ford." "I'd like to give a shout out to my wonderful, strong, beautiful daughter Emma who inspired "Brave" into being so thank you to her and my husband and our incredible cast and crew." "Thank you." "Ladies and gentlemen, will you welcome, the Oscar-winning Reese Witherspoon." "Thank you so much." "Not since the early days of sound has a film risked its actors singing live." "But the stellar cast of this film thrilled audiences with their brilliant musicality and our first nominee for best picture, "Les Miserables"." "Our second best picture nominee is "Life of Pi"." "A triumph combining magical realism, faith in God and a crackling narrative to create one of the most original films of the year." "Our third nominee for best picture proves that the American dream is still afoot when an independent film about a struggling African-American family can be honored here on this stage tonight." "This film is "Beasts of The Southern Wild"." "Singing a song of angry men?" "It is the music of a people Who will not be slaves again!" "When the beating of your heart Echoes the beating of the drums" "There is a life about to start When tomorrow comes!" "Will you join in our crusade?" "Who will be strong and stand with me?" "Beyond the barricade" "Is there a world you long to see?" "Do you hear the people sing" "Singing the song of angry men?" "There is a life about to start when tomorrow comes!" "You know, I've left so much behind, my family, the zoo, India, Anandi" "I suppose in the end, the whole of life becomes an act of letting go, but what always hurts the most is not taking a moment to say goodbye." "I know Richard Parker is a tiger, but I wish I had said it's over." "You survived." "Thank you for saving my life." "I love you, Richard Parker." "You'll always be with me." "When it all goes quiet behind my eyes..." "I see everything that made me flying around in invisible pieces." "When I look too hard, it goes away." "But when it all goes quiet, I see they're right here." "I see that I'm a little piece of a big, big universe and that makes things right." "When I die, the scientists of the future, they're going to find it all." "They're going to know." "Once there was a hushpuppy and she lived with her daddy in the bathtub." "There they are." "Our first three best picture nominees and we have an Oscar record here at age 9," "Quvenzhané Wallis is the youngest best actress nominee ever." "So let me just address those of you up for an award, so you got nominated for an Oscar, something a 9-year-old could do!" "She's adorable, Quvenzhané." "She said to me backstage." "I really hope I don't lose to that old lady, Jennifer Lawrence." "To give you an idea how young she is it'll be 16 years before she's too old for Clooney." "Okay." "You know what, I'm sorry about that." "Here, I swiped this from the mini bar." "You can be only guy here who's not buzzed." "Moving on, The Avengers was the most" "The Avengers was the most popular movie of the year which is why it's only nominated once." "But there's no denying the success of this film and here they are, all in one place, please welcome Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans," "Jeremy Renner, Mark Ruffalo and Samuel L. Jackson" "This just in, billion dollar franchise launch trumps best picture nomination." "Wow, let's take a little box office bow." "Thank you very much." "If a film crew is a tribe, the cinematographer is the shaman, battling the elements, working with light and shadow to convey that Robert is as tall as the rest of us by framing out the apple boxes he is so often standing on" "or crafting an elegant master that simultaneously conveys story, character and heighty equality." "Yet the true abilities of a cinematographer are often tested most when an aging star whose years, make that decades, of wanton self-abuse leaves his face looking like a lunar landing surface." "Excuse me, are you talking about me or you." "He's talking to you." "In my defense it wasn't decades." " Maybe for like a decade." " Yes 21/2 years times 10 or a quarter century." "Here are the nominees for achievement in cinematography." ""Anna Karenina", Seamus McGarvey." ""Django Unchained", Robert Richardson." ""Life of Pi", Claudio Miranda." ""Lincoln", Janusz Kaminski." ""Skyfall", Roger Deakins." "And the Oscar goes to..." "Claudio Miranda, "Life of Pi"." "This is the first academy award and second nomination for Claudio Miranda who was born in Santiago, Chile." "The previous nomination was in the same category for "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"." "Oh, gee, wow." "This movie was quite a beast to make, we did it and the thing that I had was so much... some great everyone was just totally there and supportive." "I was really..." "Ang and the beautiful world..." "it was like one challenge." "When you're a cinematographer one thing in this cam we had the eyes and go up and up and up and reach this thing and get excited." "There's exciting scenes like the candles and things we did that was nuts." "But it was really great and I'd like to thank everyone that made this thing totally possible, the academy, and Fox" "Oh, my God, I can't even speak." "I know." "Wrap up now, the whole thing, and like to thank my wife, my daughters up there and," "everyone, thank you so much." "And here are the nominees for..." "Whoa, whoa, wait, man." " Yeah." "You just skipped the big chunk." " You did." " Did I?" "It's important that visual effects artists are given the respect they deserve." "This was a huge year." "Is that really something that you want to say?" "Just roll it back." "Give them what they want." "No." "Let's just give them the respect they deserve and give them the damn award." " Okay." "Come on!" "Here are the nominees..." "All right." "For achievement in this all effect." ""An Unexpected Journey", Joe Letteri, Eric Saindon," "David Clayton and R. Christopher White." ""Life of Pi", Bill Westenhofer, Guillaume Rocheron," "Erik-jan de Boer and Donald R. Elliott." ""Marvel's The Avengers", Janek Sirrs, Jeff White," "Guy Williams and Dan sudick." ""Prometheus", Richard Stammers, Trevor Wood," "Charley Henley and Martin Hill." ""Snow White and The Huntsman", Cedric Nicolas-troyan, Philip Brennan," "Neil Corbould and Michael Dawson." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Life of Pi"." "This is the first academy award award for Erik-Jan de Boer and Donald R. Elliott, the second Oscar win for Bill Westenhofer." "The irony is not lost on any of us up here that in a film whose central premise is to ask the audience what is real or not real most of what you see is, well, it's fake." "Imagine visual effects." "Want to thank Gil Netter" "And all those at Fox" "For realizing sometimes it takes a risk to make something special and "Life of Pi" was a risk worth taking." "Ang Lee, you were inspiration and made an incredible journey for all of us." "Thank you." "To David Womark, Mike Malone and Tommy Fisher for making a wave tank that kept us from going out to the real ocean and Conn Killkenny for inviting us to the party in the first place and my family, making all those sacrifices," "and Gabriel, I love you so much" "I thank you for inspiring me every day." "Finally I want to thank all the artists would worked on this film for over a year." "Including rhythm in you" "Suffering severe financial difficulties right now." "I want you all to remember..." "Coming up next," "Channing Tatum, Jennifer Aniston, Halle Berry a special tribute to 50 years of James Bond." "Here at the Oscars on ABC." "Welcome back to Oscars." "Our next two presenters, at least one is honest about being a former exotic dancer." "Please welcome Channing Tatum and Jennifer Aniston." "Costume designers, make-up artists, hairstylists... you can't imagine what we owe these people." "Nope, no, you absolutely cannot." "Every one of us well, except George Clooney, who does in fact roll out of bed camera-ready... is forever shaped by these brave men and women who paint, cut, bend, twist, shave, and in some cases even wax us into the characters that you see on screen." "Wax, wax?" " Yep, uh-huh." " Well, welcome to the club, chan." "Thanks." "That's so fun, is it?" "No, no, it's not." "No." "So, it's all right." "Don't worry about it." "So tonight we honor our incredible unsung heroes... the behind-the-scenes artists who craft your favorite characters of the year." "Here are the nominees for achievement in costume design." ""Anna Karenina", costume design by Jacqueline Durran." ""Les Miserables", costume design by Paco Delgado." ""Lincoln", costume design by Joanna Johnston." ""Mirror Mirror", costume design by Eiko Ishioka." ""Snow White and The Huntsman", costume design by Colleen Atwood." "The Oscar goes to..." "Jacqueline Durran," ""Anna Karenina"." "This is the first academy award and third nomination for Jacqueline Durran who grew up in the uk." "She was previously nominated in this category for "Atonement" and "Pride and Prejudice"." "Thank you for the academy." "This is absolutely overwhelming and I'd like to accept it on behalf of the great team that worked with me on "Anna Karenina"." "A wonderful director, Joe Wright, fantastic producers at working title and my children for bearing with me." "They're completely oblivious to this, fast asleep in England." "Thank you very much." "Here are the nominees for achievement in makeup and hairstyling." ""Hitchcock", Howard Berger, Peter Montagna and Martin Samuel." ""The Hobbit, An Unexpected Journey"," "Peter Swords King, Rick Findlater and Tami Lane." ""Les Miserables", Lisa Westcott and Julie Dartnell." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Les Miserables", Lisa Westcott and Julie Dartnell." "This is the first academy award for Lisa Westcott and Julie Dartnell." "Whoa." "Thank you so much, Academy." "I don't know." "It's overwhelming." "Huge tribute to the team who worked so hard and was so talented and I feel that I only a little bit of this and the rest did." "Thank you very much." "Thank you very much." "It's an incredible honor." "Thank you so much and I just want to give love to my family, my mum, my dad." "Tom Holly and Dave, thank you." "A lot of beautiful women here tonight." "A lot of beautiful women and for those of you who gave themselves the flub two weeks ago to get there," "Paid off." "Looking good." "Now, please welcome one of the most beautiful women in the world and one of my favorite bond girls of all time" "Oscar winner Halle Berry." "Tonight, we celebrate the 50th anniversary of James Bond in motion pictures." "We do it with music, which is as inextricably linked to Bond as the Martini, exotic cars, and Pussy Galore." "In film after film, moviegoers have been treated to songs reflective of the moment and scores as engaging as cool as 007 himself." ""Bond Music" is a genre all its own... guaranteed to make your heart beat faster and take your breath away." "Here's a look at the sights, sounds, and music of the past five decades of James Bond." "Ladies and gentlemen, dame Shirley Bassey." "Goldfinger he's the man the man with the midas touch" "a spider's touch such a cold finger" "beckons you to enter his web of sin but don't go in" "golden words he will pour in your ear but his lies can't disguise what you fear" "for a golden girl knows when he's kissed her it's the kiss of death from Mr. Goldfinger" "pretty girl beware of his heart of gold his heart is cold" "golden words he will pour in your ear but his lies can't disguise what you fear" "for a golden girl knows when he's kissed her it's the kiss of death" "from Mr. Goldfinger pretty girl beware of his heart of gold" "his heart is cold he loves only gold" "only gold he loves gold" "he loves only gold only gold" "he loves gold" "Now, I want to take a moment to acknowledge three people who have worked very, very hard to make tonight's show great." "Our brilliant producers Craig Zadan and Neal Meron." "Whose skill and talents are only exceeded by their good nature and masterful director Don Michener." "Watching this legendary guy at work is an experience, frankly, everyone in show business should have." "And now please welcome our next two presenters." "They are the stars of "Django Unchained", gentlemen, Kerry Washington and Oscar winner, Jamie Foxx." "This is the first year that the Academy has made available to the membership, on DVD, all the nominated live action shorts." "So pay attention." "Because where do you think Spielberg and Scorsese came from?" "Where did they come from?" " They made short films." " Right." "They made short films." "So our future a-listers are right here in this envelope." "Here are the nominees for best live action short film." ""Asad", Bryan Buckley and Mino Jarjoura." ""Buzkashi Boys", Sam French and Ariel Nasr." ""Curfew", Shawn Christensen." ""Death of A Shadow", Tom Van Avermaet and Ellen de Waele." ""Henry", Yan England." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Curfew", Shawn Christensen." "This is the first academy award and nomination for Shawn Christensen." "Thanks." "Wow, a big thank you to the Academy for supporting short films." "This has been wonderful and I only have t-minus two seconds to do it." "My producer in crime, Damon Russell, I love you, man, we would not be here without you, brother." "My co-star, 12-year-old co-star father team ma, your performance was so incredible." "Nobody even remembers I'm in the film because of you." "You are incredible." "Mary and Andrew, thank you so much." "The incredible cinematography from Daniel Katz and putting together the wonderful crew," "Thank you so much all over friends, family and crew in New York and France," "My beautiful mother." "My devilishly handsome father." "And the center of my universe, my dearest Nina." "Thank you." "I love you all." "And here are the nominees for best documentary short subject." ""Inocente", Sean Fine and Andrea Nix Fine." ""Kings Point", Sari Gilman and Jedd Wider." ""Mondays At Racine", Cynthia Wade and Robin Honan." ""Open Heart", Kief Davidson and Cori Shepherd Stern." ""Redemption", Jon Alpert and Matthew O'Neill." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Inocente", Sean Fine and Andrea Nix Fine." "This is the first academy award and second nomination for Sean Fine and Andrea Nix Fine and received the first for their film "War Bath"" "in the documentary short subject category." "Thank you so much for this." "We just want to thank quickly our amazing crew," "Arvie and Susan" "And Ryan and Jeff, incredible editor with us and all artistic exploits." "And most of all this young lady was homeless a year ago and now standing in front of all of you and she is an artist and all of you are artists and we feel like we need to start supporting the ors." "They're dying in our community and all of our artists need to stand up and help girls like her be seen and heard." "That's so important." "Thank you." "In the hugely successful movies our next presenter plays a middle age man looking for a girl." "Go down." "Harvey Weinstein, joked... okay, we didn't write that one yet but will work on it." "He has become the definition of a modern American superhero." "Please welcome Mr. Liam Neeson." "Good evening." "Our fourth film nominated for best picture is "Argo", blending together elements of a thriller, a realistic Hollywood satire, the drama, making us long for the hostages to be rescued by the one intrepid agent who could." "Our next nominated film," "Our 16th president was brought to life as a flawed, magnificent human being struggling against an all-too-familiar tide of congressional gridlock." "Fifth nominee for best picture, "Lincoln"." "The sixth nominated best picture, "Zero Dark Thirty", allows us to eavesdrop on one of the great procedurals of the 21st century leaving with an almost unprecedented feeling that what we are watching or not watching a film but real life." " Big shot." " We're not actually doing anything." " No." "No?" " Jim brought some books to read." " No." "Somebody's responsible when things happen." "I'm responsible." "I'm taking them." "True north from where you're standing but got no advice about the swamps, deserts and chasms that you'll encounter along the way and you plunge ahead heedless of obstacles and achieve nothing more than sink in a swamp." "What's the use of knowing true north?" "Abolishing slavery by constitutional provision settles the fate of all coming time, not only of the millions now in bondage," "but of unborn millions to come." "100% he's there." "Okay, fine, 95% because I know certainty freaks you guys out but it's 100%." "How do you evaluate the risk of not doing something?" "Huh?" "The risk of potentially letting Bin Laden slip through your fingers?" "It's her against the world." "Oh, yeah." "Here they are, our second batch of best picture nominees." "You know, this is interesting." "Daniel Day-Lewis, not the first actor to be nominated for playing Lincoln." "Raymond Massey portrayed him in 1940s "Abe Lincoln in Illinois"." "This is true." "I would argue, however, that the actor who really got inside Lincoln's head was John Wilkes Booth." "Really, 150 years and it's still too soon, huh?" "I got some Napoleon jokes coming up, you guys are going to be so mad." "Oh, my God." "How about Ben Affleck, "Argo"?" "Fast-paced, gripping, nominated for best picture." "This man has gone from starring in "Gigli" to becoming one of the most respected filmmakers of this generation." "I feel like we're six months away from having to call Benjamin Affleck." "I thought we'd cut this joke but really, want to do it?" "First time I saw him with all that dark facial hair I thought," "Okay." "All right." "So it worked." "Which is why it's live." "And how great was Jessica Chastain in "Zero Dark Thirty"?" "Yeah." "Playing a woman who spends almost 12 years tracking Osama bin Laden." "12 years." "The film was a triumph and also a celebration of every woman's innate ability to never ever let anything go." "All right." "Our next presenter is a gifted writer and director, please welcome Oscar winner, the multitalented Ben Affleck." "Thank you." "Thank you, Seth." "I actually thought the show had been going pretty well, but maybe you can turn it around." "The documentary filmmaker uses the camera to show real life and real people in a way that's insightful, astonishing but above truthful." "Those living in the west bank, behind the scenes operatives working in secret in that same land." "The life and death battle waged 30 years ago by activists trying to stop the spread of aids, the war being waged against our nation's female warriors." "And a journey to find a long lost musical legend." "Here are the nominees for best documentary feature." ""5 Broken Cameras"," "Emad Burnat and Guy Davidi." ""The Gatekeepers"," "Dror Moreh, Philippa Kowarsky and Estelle Fialon." ""How to Survive a Plague"," "David France and Howard Gertler." ""The Invisible War"," "Kirby Dick and Amy Ziering." ""Searching For Sugar Man"," "Malik Bendjelloul and Simon Chinn." "Okay." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Searching For Sugar Man"." "Malik Bendjelloul and Simon Chinn." "This is the first academy award and nomination for Malik Bendjelloul." "This is the second Oscar and second nomination for Simon Chinn who took home his first in the category for "Man On A Wire"." "Oh, boy." "Thank you so much." "Thanks to the Academy, very, very kind." "Thanks to one of the greatest singers ever, Rodriguez, and..." "Steven and Cammila, Strong, Svt, Sfi, former friends and family and then Sony classics, the best distributor on this planet." "Thank you." "I also want to thank Sony classics, Tom and Michael," "I want to thank John Batsek," "Andrew Humanen and the team of pictures, Josh Braun, Submarine and my dear wife, Laura, without I wouldn't be able to do any of this." "Rodriguez isn't here tonight." "Because he didn't want to take any of the credit himself and that just about says everything about that man and his story that you want to know." "Thank you." "When we come back Jessica Chastain," "Jennifer Garner, Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway the cast of "Prometheus" explains what the hell was going on." "More Oscars after this." "We are back." "It's Sunday, everybody is dressed up." "This is like church only with more people praying." "Our next two presenters have both played government agents and both have kicked ass on screen in every sense." "Please welcome Jennifer Garner Oscar nominee, Jessica Chastain." "The 63 previous recipients of the Oscar for best foreign language film come from nations that span the globe, from Asia to Africa, Europe to South America." "This year's nominees are equally diverse, representing countries from three different continents." "Regardless of their nation of origin, their universal themes transcend all boundaries by touching our common humanity." "Here are the nominees for best foreign language film." "From Austria, "Amour", directed by Michael Haneke." "From Norway, "Kon-Tiki", directed by Joachim Ronning and Espen Sandberg." "From Chile, "No", directed by Pablo Larrain." "From Denmark, "A Royal Affair", directed by Nikolaj Arcel." "From Canada, "War Witch", directed by Kim Nguyen." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Amour", Austria, Michael Haneke." "This is the second movie from Austria to win the academy award for foreign language film." "Thank you very much." "What an honor." "I have to thank Michael from Sony classics, thank you very much." "Thank you to my producers, they are here, all," "Margaret Menegoz, Michael Katz, Veit Heiduschka..." "Thank you to my great crew, thank you to my wife." "She was member of the crew." "She's supporting me in 30 years." "You are the center of my life." "And thank you above all to my both main actors," "Emmanuelle Riva, Jean Louis Trintingnant" "Because without them, I will not stay here." "Thank you." "I want to take a moment to acknowledge a very, very important part of tonight's show, our magnificent orchestra which believe it or not, yeah," "and being performing live tonight from Capitol Theatre these are some of the finest musicians in the world and we're very lucky to have them." "They're led by musical director, the magnificent William Ross." "And now, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome our next presenter." "Tony Manaro, Danny Zucko, but underneath it all, he's John Travolta." "Say yes." "Okay." "Because I got a big treat for you." "When I came of age, movie musicals were beginning to revive." ""Saturday Night Fever" put a spring in my step, and by the time I did "Grease", you were willing to suspend disbelief and once again accept that actors were singing and dancing to that great, invisible orchestra" "even with "Hairspray"." "So tonight" "I will introduce a celebration of some of the finest movie musicals of the last decade and now I am going to say the word "Oscar" a lot." "Tonight's Oscar nominees, Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway, along with cast members Russell Crowe," "Amanda Seyfried, Eddie Redmayne, Samantha Barks," "Aaron Tveit, Helena Bonham Carter and Sacha Baron Cohen all from the Oscar nominated best picture, "Les Miserables"," "Oscar winner Jennifer Hudson in "Dreamgirls"" "and Oscar winner Catherine Zeta-Jones in Oscar winning best picture, "Chicago"." "Come on, babe why don't we paint the town and all that jazz I'm gonna Rouge my knees and roll my stockings down" "and all that jazz start the car I know a whoopee spot where the gin is cold but the piano's hot it's just a noisy hall where there's a nightly brawl and all that" "Jazz" "slick your hair and wear your buckle shoes and all that jazz I hear that father dipp is gonna blow the blues and all that jazz hold on hon, we're gonna bunny hug" "I bought some asperin down at united drug in case you shake apart and wanna brand new start to do that jazz come on, babe why don't we paint the town and all that jazz" "I'm gonna Rouge my knees and roll my stockings down and all that jazz start the car I know a whoopee spot where the gin is cold but the piano's hot it's just a noisy hall where there's a nightly brawl" "and all that" "no, I'm no one's wife, but oh, I love my life and all that" "jazz that jazz" "And I am telling you" "I'm not going" "You're the best man I'll ever know" "There's no way I could ever go" "Please don't go away from me" "Stay with me, stay with me" "Stay, stay and hold me I-I-I-I-I-I" "Stay, stay and hold me" "Please stay and hold me." "Mr. man try it, mister" "Try it, mister try it, mister I know, I know I know you can" "Tear down the mountains yell, scream and shout, you can." "Say what you want but I ain't walking out" "Stop all the rivers push, strike and kill" "I'm not gonna leave you there's no way I will" "And I am telling you" "I'm not going" "You're the best man I'll ever know" "I don't wanna be free I'm staying" "I'm staying and you, and you, and you" "And you you're gonna love me" "You're gonna love" "Yes are, yes, are, oh" "Gonna love, love" "You are" "Gonna love" "Me" "Suddenly you're here suddenly it starts" "Can two anxious hearts beat as one" "Yesterday I was alone today you are beside me" "Suddenly I see what I could not see" "Something, suddenly has begun" "One day more another day, another destiny" "This never-ending road to calvary" "These men who seem to know my crime will surely come a second time one day more" "I dreamed a dream in time gone away" "When hope was high and life worth living" "One day more." " Tomorrow you'll be worlds away and yet with you my world has started" "One more day all on my own." " Will we ever meet again" "One more day with him not caring." " I was born to be with you" "What a life I might have known." " And I swear I will be true" "But he never saw me there" "One more day before the storm." " Do I follow where she goes" "At the barricades of freedom." " Shall I join my brothers there" "Will you take your place with me." " The time is now, the day is here" "The time is now" "The day is here" "One day more" "One day more to revolution we will nip it in the bud" "We'll be ready for these schoolboys" "They will wet themselves with blood?" "One day to a new beginning" "Raise the flag of freedom high!" "Do you hear the people sing?" "My place is here," "I fight with you!" "One day more!" "We will join these people's heros" "We will follow where they go" "We will learn their little secrets," "We will know the things they know." "One more day to revolution" "We will nip it in the bud" "We'll be ready for these schoolboys" "Tomorrow is the judgement day" "Tomorrow we'll discover" "What our God in heaven has in store!" "One more dawn" "One more day" "One day more!" "Welcome back." "And now please welcome current "Star Trek" stars" "Chris Pine and Zoe Saldana." "For over 80 years, the film industry has honored scientists, engineers, innovators and tech experts who make the movies so much fun to watch." "Earlier this month that tradition continued at the academy's scientific and technical awards." "Here are some of the awards we were honored to present." "The class of 2012 was recognized for diverse offerings, including a computerized tissue system that simulates how muscles and fat move, which allows filmmakers to create stunt doubles or animated main characters." "a mathematical technique that became the foundation to create many computer-generated characters a more reliable power source with extended run time for the increasing use of digital cameras." "The John Bonner medal of commendation to Bill Taylor, leading visual effects supervisor, which culminated with an Oscar presented to Cooke optics." "The company first introduced picture lenses in 1921." "Les Zellan accepted." "I would like to thank the academy for bestowing this award on Cooke optics." "You know, there are so many distinguished nominees here tonight, you guys have made some beautiful, some inspiring movies." "I made "Ted"." "You don't mean that." "Your movies are here to receive awards." "My movie is in red boxes in front of grocery stores being urinated on by bums." "Regar..." "Only if that were a joke." "Regardless please welcome the stars of my mini Effort, mark wahlberg and Ted." "Ah, there we go." "Thanks, Marky." "Hey, is Ed Harris nominated for anything tonight, do you know?" "No, I don't think so." "Okay, all right, then we can take the stool with us when we leave." "Rock at all these people out there dressed up looking sharp thinking about how much sex they're going to have with each other later." "Ted, what are you talking about, man?" "Look, all right, I'll come clean with you, I just want to be part of it." "Huh?" "Come on you guys, please, just tell me where it's going to be." "Look, Ted, no one knows what you're talking about, okay?" "Mark, the big post Oscars Hollywood orgy." "Please tell me where it is." "Look, I think your imagination has gotten out of control, dude look, come on." "I'm really good at sex." "And I can bring sodas, snacks and soaps" "All right, it's at Jack Nicholson's house." "****" "Here are the nominees for best sound mixing." ""Argo", John Reitz, Gregg Rudloff and Jose Antonio Garcia." ""Les Miserables", Andy Nelson, Mark Paterson and Simon Hayes." ""Life of Pi", Ron Bartlett, D. M. Hemphill and Drew Kunin." ""Lincoln", Andy Nelson, Gary Rydstrom and Ronald Judkins." ""Skyfall", Scott Millan, Greg P. Russell and Stuart Wilson." "And the Oscar goes to..." ""Les Miserables"." "Andy Nelson, Mark Paterson and Simon Hayes." "This is the first Academy award and nomination for Mark Paterson and Simon Hayes." "Including his nomination for this year for Sound Mixing for "Lincoln", this is the 18th academy award nomination and second win for Andy Nelson." "Thank you so much." "Boy, what an amazing honor to receive this tonight." "tonight the night that Oscar celebrates music was fantastic." "Huge thank you to Tom Hooper our director." "Amazing cast that brought all the passion and heart of the story to the screen." "We thank you so much." "Cameron, Eric, Debra, working under Universal, thank you all" "And from Simon, Mark and myself, a huge thank you, thank you." "Boy, this is pretty cool, huh?" " You and me at the academy?" " This is insane, dude." "Look at all this talent, all this talent in one spot." "There's... there's Daniel Day-Lewis." "There's Alan Arkin." "There's Joaquin Phoenix." "And you know what's interesting?" "All those actors I just named are part Jewish." "Oh, okay." "What about you, you got a "berg" on the end of your name, are you Jewish?" "Am I Jewish?" "No, actually, I'm catholic." "Wrong answer, try again." "What?" "Look, you wanna work in this town, or don't you?" "That's interesting, Mark, because I am Jewish." " No, you're not." " I am, I am." "I was born Theodore Shapiro, and I would like to donate money to Israel and continue to work in Hollywood forever." "Thank you." "I am Jewish." "You're an idiot." "Yeah, well, we'll see who is the Idiot when they give my private plane at the next secret synagogue meeting." "Look, Im not doing a sequel with you, Ok?" "And the nominees for best sound editing are..." ""Argo", Erik Aadahl and Ethan Van der Ryn" ""Django Unchained", Wylie Stateman." ""Life of Pi", Eugene Gearty and Philip Stockton." ""Skyfall", Per Hallberg and Karen Baker Landers." ""Zero Dark Thirty", Paul N. J. Ottosson." "And the Oscar goes to..." "We have a tie." "No B. S. We have a tie." "The first Oscar goes to "Zero Dark Thirty", Paul N. J. Ottosson." "To the academy, thank you." "Such an honor." "Kathryn, what a fantastic movie." "And my crew," "I was fortunate to be here a few years ago for "The Hurt Locker"" "and I was awarded two of these." "I woke up in the morning, 7:00," "One for mommy and one for daddy and he looked at me and said, where's mine?" "And Theo, I love you, Karen, I love you." "Mom watching at home, I love you and my dad, with God now, I love you." "I miss you." "Good night." "Thank you." "And the second Oscar goes to" ""Skyfall", Per Hallberg and Karen Baker Landers." "This is the third academy award for Per Hallberg and the second win for Karen Baker Landers." "they each won an Oscar in the category for "The Bourne Ultimatum"." "Well, thank you, the Academy, this is so cool." "Well, we wished we could work on a bond movie and we never quite thought that was going to happen, but it did, and we just want to thank Michael and Barbara for inviting us to the family." "Then we... then we got Sam Mendes as the director and that just made it even sweeter." "We got to mix for our friends," "Scott and Greg and now this." "And I just want to say that all the other nominees in this category were all storytellers, we just tell our story through sound and this is a huge honor." "Tell me to wrap it up." "I want to thank Peter Staubli, Dino DiMuro, Chris Assells, Dan Hegeman." "Chris Hogan, Stuver and our guys, Tony and Phil." " Chris Jargo, Craig Jaeger." "Thank you so much." "Thank you." "Our next presenter boasts an acting career that spans seven decades, but he is perhaps best known for the "Sound of Music"" "and his timeless portrayal, Cap." "Von Trap" "Head of the Von Trapp family singers." "The family Von Trapp." "They're gone!" "That's that joke." "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome a legend," "Oscar winning actor Christopher Plummer." "New song." "Pick on someone your own size." "As I know only too well, perseverance pays." "And these richly talented ladies nominated tonight are none of them overnight successes." "No, sir, they are all seasoned perennials who have been acting since they were teenagers and I strongly suspect that they will continue to do so until they are even older than me." "And in this year of remarkableably brave performances," "I am somewhat dismayed to have to announce a winner." "But I look forward to the honor of working with any of these ladies in my next 30 films." "Here are the nominees for best performance by an actress in a supporting role." "Amy Adams, "The Master"." "What we do we have to drop it." "The only way to defend ourselves is to attack." "If we don't do that, we will lose every battle that we are engaged in." "We will never dominate our environment the way we should unless we attack!" "Sally Field, "Lincoln"." " I should have clapped you in the madhouse!" " Then do it!" "Do it." "Don't you threaten me, you do it this time, lock me away." "You'll have to, I swear." "If Robert is killed." "Anne Hathaway, "Les Miserables"." "I never dreamed my life would be" "From this hell I'm living" "You'll never know what it seems" "Helen Hunt, "The Sessions"" "You discussed his fantasies which were mostly masochistic, again, the idea of being punished." "He's never seen female genitalia before and seems quite frightened at the thought of it." "Jacki Weaver, "Silver Linings Playbook"." " Pat, this whole thing was a mistake." " I'm sorry, mom." "I am out on a limb with you with the court right now." "And the Oscar, goes to..." "Miss Anne Hathaway." "This is the first academy award and second nomination for Anne Hathaway she's previously nominated for her leading role in "Rachel Is Getting Married"" "It came true." "Ah, thank you so much to the Academy for this and for nominating me with Helen Hunt," "Jacki Weaver, Amy Adams and Sally Field." "I look up to you all so much and it's been such an honor." "Thank you." "There are so many people whose generosity and support are with me right now." "I must thank Hugh Jackman." "The cast, the crew, especially" "Simon Hayes and the sand wizards, congratulations on tonight, you guys the creative team behind "Les Miserables"," "Cameron Mackintosh, Tom Hooper and marking at all Debra Hayward and from Universal," "Ron Meyer, Donna Langley, thank you guys for your faith and thank you for this opportunity." "I have to thank my team led by the lion hearted Susan," "Josh Lieberman, Nick Sullivan," "Mahad Nakil." "Please say I say everyone." "Cause ceived many again, just to be safe," "Steven, Jason Sloan and special contributions by Frank and Carrie Wagner." "I want to thank my friends especially the ones cheering from Crosby street tonight." "My family who I'm so blessed to be a part of." "My husband." "By far and away the greatest moment of my life was the one when you walked into it." "I love you so much." "And thank you for this." "Here's hoping that someday in the not too distant future the misfortunes of Fantine will only be found in stories and never more in real life." "Thank you." "Coming up, a special performance of "Skyfall" by Adele." "Plus, the Oscar for film editing right after this." "Welcome back." "Academy president Hawk Koch grew up on the set of his father's movies and went on to become an incredible producer on his own." "Now ladies and gentlemen please welcome our Academy president a man so respected, it doesn't matter his name sounds like a Russian guy sneezing," "Hawk Koch." "Thank you, Seth!" "And thank you." "The Academy is about recognizing the great achievements of the present, honoring our past, and ushering in the future of movies." "And the Academy's future is very exciting." "It's a few years away, but, when it's done," "I want to invite everyone around the world to come to Los Angeles to visit the new Academy Museum of Motion Pictures." "You'll be able to explore how movies are made, learn about our history, journey to the cutting edge of film technology, and even take a walk on the red carpet." "It will be the first of its kind." "And speaking of firsts, earlier this year, we held a contest for college students asking them to make a video about how they would contribute to the future of movies." "The winners are helping us hand out oscars on stage tonight and here they are from Duluth, Minnesota, DePaul University, Abe Diaz." "From Harare, Zimbabwe and Ucla, Go, Bruins," "Tatenda Mbudzi." "From Brooklyn, New York attending Suny Potsdam, Charon Brabham." "From Mesa, Arizona and Columbia College, Chicago, A. J. Young." "From Seoul, South Korea and Emerson College, Hearin Ko." "And from Ut-Austin, a marine corps veteran who served in Afghanistan, Jennifer Brofer." "Congratulations!" "And I'll see you at the new Academy Museum!" "That's a good idea." "A bunch of coeds and drunk producers at an open bar." "That's great." "Our next presenter played a raging alcoholic in "28 Days"" "which is kind of a weird coincidence because I'm going to be playing one in about an hour 45 minutes." "And I might be playing one right now." "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Oscar winner Sandra Bullock" "Editors take raw mass and sculpt it down to is essential kernel of truth." "What a particularly sadistic butcher might do a rump roast or a hamhock, an editor must do to film." "We actors love our editors, they protect us, they on occasion lie for us." "They hypothetically might hold on a shot of my watering eyes, put a lump in the audience's throat provoking that deep, deep emotion, telling anyone that it may be my words" "Have possibly been just something stuck to my contact irritating my eyeball." "But, again, that's just a hypothetical example I was using." "Editors make so many of us look way better than we ever have the right to and here are the nominees for achievement in film editing." ""Argo", William Goldenberg" ""Life of Pi", Tim Squyres," ""Lincoln", Michael Kahn," ""Silver Linings Playbook", Jay Cassidy and Crispin Struthers." ""Zero Dark Thirty", Dylan Tichenor and William Goldenberg." "And the Oscar goes to..." "William Goldenberg, "Argo"." "Including this nomination this year for film editing for "Zero Dark Thirty", this is the fourth academy award nomination for William Goldenberg and his first Oscar win." "Thank you, guys." "Thank you all so much." "Thank you members of the academy for honoring "Argo" with this this award." "I really, really appreciate it." "I want to thank my great crew," "Brett, Joe and Paula," "I want to thank Warner Brothers and I want to thank our great producers" "George Clooney and Grant Heslov and Chris Terrio for writing and editor's dream for a screenplay and, Ben, I share this with you, you're my brother, I love you and thank you for this" "my wife house Ahm and my child Nathad Eric." "Thank you so much." "You made it all possible." "And thank everybody." "Thank you and good night." "Nominated for best actress in a leading role tonight, please welcome Jennifer Lawrence." "Our next performer, one of this evening's nominees for best songs has joined the canon with a great James Bond movie music" "Song as irresistible as 007 itself performing her hit from the movie "Skyfall", please welcome the unstoppable Adele." "This is the end" "Hold your breath and count to ten" "Feel the earth move and then" "Hear my heart burn" "Again" "For this is the end" "I've drowned and dreamt his moment" "So overdue I owe them" "Swept away I'm stolen" "Let the sky fall when it crumbles" "We will stand tall" "And face it all together" "At skyfall" "Skyfall is where we start" "A thousand miles poles apart" "Where worlds collide and days are dark" "You may have my number" "You can take my name" "But you'll never have my heart" "Let the sky fall (Let the sky fall)" "When it crumbles (When it crumbles)" "We will stand tall (We will stand tall)" "Face it all together" "Let the sky fall (Let the sky fall)" "When it crumbles (When it crumbles)" "We will stand tall (We will stand tall)" "And face it all together" "At sky fall" "Where you go I go" "What you see I see" "I know I'll never be" "Without the security" "From your loving arms" "Keeping me from harm" "With your hand in my hand" "And we'll face it" "Let the sky fall (Let the sky fall)" "When it crumbles (When it crumbles)" "We will stand tall (We will stand tall)" "Face it all together" "Let the sky fall (Let the sky fall)" "When it crumbles (When it crumbles)" "We will stand tall (We will stand tall)" "And face it all together" "At skyfall" "Let the sky fall" "We will stand tall" "At skyfall oh" "And here to introduce our next best picture nominees," "Oscar winner, Nicole Kidman." "The course of true love is far from smooth in our next nominee for best picture." "Depression, incarceration and meds threaten this couple's romance at every step." "Yet these challenges are touching to overcome in this instant classic, "Silver Linings Playbook"." "Our next best picture nominee" "Sorry." "David, let them clap, right?" "Our next best picture nominee," ""Django Unchained" is hilarious, uncomfortable, visceral and a brilliant homage to forgetting The Western heroism." ""Django" gives us the moral right, and along with it, a wicked thrill." "And our next nominated film is a deeply feeling and unflinching look at an aging couple agonizing choices." ""Amour" asks us as few films do to reflect simply and softly on the true meaning of love." "I am not the explosion guy, OK?" "I'm sorry!" "I'm sorry." " Excelsior." " What that mean?" "It means you know what I'm gonna do?" "I'm gonna take this negativity and use it as fuel." "I'm gonna find a silver lining." "That's I'm gonna do." "You're afraid to live." "You're a hypocrite." "You're a conformist." "You're a liar." "I opened up to you and you judged me." "Do you feel that?" "That's emotion." "I don't feel anything." ""Silver Linings Playbook"" "Hilde was a... princess." "They call me Hilde." "Her father is really mad at her" "So he puts her on top of the mountain." "And he puts a fire breathing dragon there to guard the Mountain." "And there, Brünhilde shall remain, unless a hero arises brave enough to save her." "Does a fella arise?" "Quite spectacularly so." "Django Unchained" "It's beautiful." "What?" "Life." "So long." ""Amour"" "Let's bring out our next presenters." "He is a boy wizard and she's a girl vampire." "So together they're pretty much everything that Christian Wright says is wrong with Hollywood." "Please welcome Daniel Radcliffe and Kristen Stewart." "Our next award honors those who give a film its visual concept and design." "These artists whose work you are about to see created the remarkable and unique look of middle earth, of a man and tiger lost at sea, and of 19th century Russia, Paris and the American civil war." "Here are the nominees for achievement in production design." ""Anna Karenina", production design by Sarah Greenwood and the set decoration Katie Spencer." ""The Hobbit, An Unexpected Journey", production design by Dan Hennah and set decoration by Ra Vincent and Simon Bright." ""Les Miserables", production design by Eve Stewart and set decoration Bianna Lynch-Robinson." ""Life of Pi", production design by David Gropman and set decoration Bianna Pinnock." ""Lincoln", production design by Rick Carter and set decoration by Jim Erickson." "And the Oscar goes to "Lincoln", Rick Carter and Jim Erickson." "This is the first academy award and second nomination for Jim Erickson." "The second Oscar win and fourth nomination for Rick Carter." "Very much not prepared for this." "Jim Erickson who is the set decorator shares this honor and all of us who worked on this movie of "Lincoln"," "I think in our own ways tried to be worthy of a legacy that's way beyond all of us, but especially Steven and Kathy and Tony and Sally, but of course, Daniel who actually convinced us that he was Lincoln" "and the legacy that I think that he personified for all of us goes to our heart and it's worth far more than any gold that any of us could ever have and I just thank you and I love my wife Adele." "Well, we have finally reached the point in the ceremony where either Javier Bardem, Penelope Cruise or Salma Hayek comes on stage have no idea what they're saying but we don't care because they're so attractive." "Please welcome Salma Hayek." "Each year, in a special ceremony known as the governors awards, the academy pays tribute to individuals who exemplify excellence in the world of motion pictures." "This year, three gentlemen received The Academy Honorary Award, recognizing achievements in filmmaking," "Hal Needham," "D. A. Pennebaker, and George Stevens Jr." "For his lifelong commitment to philanthropy," "Jeffrey Katzenberg received the Jean Hersholt humanitarian award." "Let's take a moment to celebrate our four honorees." "D. A. Pennebaker." "He made nothing less than the modern documentary." "Thinking about this award made me feel like you guys consider us fellow filmmakers and that's wonderful." "Thank you." "George Stevens gets the act of honoring others, made it a sublime art." "George had a vision." "That vision became the American vision." "Because of our shared value of film." "Legendary, Hal Needham pushed the boundaries of what could be done in action." "I want to thank the entire Hollywood community for allowing me to be part of it." "Jefrey Katzenberg" "His charitable efforts stand out for the depth of his commitment." "It is my honor to present himself the Gene Hersholt humanitarian award." "I believe this particular Hersholt Award is a recognition of the extraordinary generosity of our industry towards improving the real world we all share." "Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in saluting these four nominees, who are here with us tonight." "We'll be right back with George Clooney," "Queen Latifah, Jane Fonda, Michael Douglas and our "in memoriam" tribute when the Oscars continues" "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to Academy award winner" "George Clooney." "All right." "Well now we come to the part of the evening that we could dedicate an entire show to." ""In memoriam"." "The friends, and people we've admired, that we lost this year." "And although they're no longer with us, they've left something with us, they've left something behind." "Something that makes us laugh or cry or just escape for a couple hours, so to those friends who are on this list tonight, and many others one" "We thank you for the memories." "'Cause there's an obligation that we have because of the power," "Channel to have the highest ethics." "there's always a search that goes on, there's always this inevitable journey that you take." "It's also nice to pass on" "The feelings that I have." "I love what I do." "I love this challenge." "When a song comes into my mind," "I just can't sleep." "I think the hardest thing about writing is writing." "We should just call this a sport because we all enjoy playing together." "They know the ability to fantasize is the ability to grow." "The most important thing is the story" "Not the script, but the story." "Marvin Hamlisch was a composer of extraordinary depth and versatility." "He was also a very kind and generous friend who could always make me laugh." "And over the years we shared so many adventures together." "Marvin left us way too soon, but I'll always have those wonderful, wonderful..." "Memories" "Like the corners of my mind" "Misty water-colored memories" "Of the way we were" "Scattered pictures" "Of the smiles we left behind" "Smiles we gave to one another" "For the way we were" "Can it be that it was All so simple then?" "Or has time re-written every line?" "If we had the chance" "To do it all again" "Tell me would we" "Of course, we would" "Could we" "Memories" "May be beautiful and yet" "What's too painful to remember" "We simply choose to forget" "So it's the laughter" "The laughter we will remember" "Whenever we remember" "The way you were" "The way you were" "Welcome back." "In just a moment, Rex Reed will be out here to review Adele's performance of "Skyfall"." "But first this year marks the 10th anniversary of "Chicago" winning best picture." "And now we are bringing the stars of that game-changing musical because we're concerned that tonight's show isn't gay enough yet." "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Richard Gere," "Queen Latifah, Renee Zellweger and Catherine Zeta-Jones from the cast of "Chicago"." "Here we are." "If you've ever seen a film before the musical score is attached... in a place that looks something like this... there's really no polite way to put this, it just..." "It just lies there." "A movie's score is the electrical charge, it's the breath of life... the creator of suspense and the bringer of tears." "And what makes our hearts swell at the final kiss." "A great musical score is so memorable and so vivid, that we will forgive it, even as it chases us, years later, through malls and elevators." "Here are the nominees for best original score." ""Anna Karenina", by Dario Marianelli." ""Argo", by Alexandre Desplat." ""Life of Pi", by Mychael Danna." ""Skyfall", by Thomas Newman." ""Lincoln", by John Williams." "And the Oscar goes to... if I open this up here." "Go ahead." ""Life of Pi", Mychael Danna." "Life of Pi!" "Life of Pi!" "The nomination this year for original song for "Life of Pi", this is his second Academy award nomination for Mychael Danna and his first Oscar win." "Thanks." "I share this wondrous award with our visionary captain," "Mr. Ang Lee, there he is, we're playing this game again." "Who guided a truly task and crew in the telling of this wondrous, beautiful story that transcends culture and race and religion in the same spirit musicians from around the globe came together to breathe life into this music and I hold this award on their behalf." "I want to thank my beautiful Fox family, my mom, who's in a balcony here watching, my father who is also watching and most of all my wife and for our two beautiful boys Arthur and Katio" "who remind me every day why stories like this need to be told." "Thank you, everyone." "Thank you, Academy, thank you." "And now, for the nominations for best original song." "Earlier this evening you heard these nominees perform." ""Skyfall" from "Skyfall", music and lyric by Adele Adkins and Paul Epworth." "And "Suddenly", from "Les Miserables", music by Claude-Michel Schönberg, lyric by Herbert Kretzmer and Alain Boublil." "And here are the final three nominated songs." ""Before My Time", from "Chasing Ice", music and lyric from J. Ralph." "Performed by Scarlet Johansson and Joshua Bell." "Cold feet" "Don't fail me now" "So much left to do" "If I should run ten thousand miles home" "Would you be there?" "I don't wanna die alone" "I don't wanna die alone" "Way before on" "My time has come" ""Pi's Lullaby" from "Life of Pi", music by Mychael Danna, lyric by Bombay Jayashri, performed by Bombay Jayashri." ""Everybody Needs a Best Friend", from "Ted"." "Music from Walter Murphy lyrics by Seth MacFarlane." "Performed by Norah Jones." "My words are lazy" "My thoughts are hazy" "But this is one thing I'm sure of" "Everybody needs a best friend" "I'm happy I'm yours" "You got a double who brings you trouble" "And though you're better without me" "Everybody needs a best friend" "I'm so happy I'm yours" "A fool could see decidedly" "That you're a ten and I'm a three" "A royal brie is what you need" "So how did you come to be stuck with a bummer like me" "Oh you got a head full of dreadful" "And yet lest that someone adores you" "Everybody needs a best friend" "I'm happy I'm yours I'm just a clown" "And I'll bring you down" "But you just don't care 'cause your" "Best friend is me" "And the Oscar goes to..." "There it is. "Skyfall"." "Adele Addkins and Paul Epworth." "This is the first academy award and nomination for Adele Addkins and Paul Epworth." "Thank you so much." "Thank you." "This is amazing." "I would just like to thank Michael Wilson." "Sony pictures, MGM." "Oh, God." "For believing in me all my time and my mom, I love you, baby." "Yes, thanks very much." "I can't believe I'm up here to receive this." "I got to thank the academy, of course." "Sam Mendes," "Barbara Broccoli, Michael Wilson" "Liv and Neal Rich and Lore Empire." "Wheels, Jonathan Rose, my friend Danielle and my daughter Vivian and Joe and Matt who worked on this for us, spent hours and and hours late nights in the studio to make this piece of music" "I would like to thank Adele for being the best person I've ever worked with." " She's absolutely amazing." " Thank you very much." "You're all amazing." "Thank you very much." "Coming up Meryl Streep, Michael Douglas and the awards for best actress and actor in a leading role and best picture." "It's the Oscars here on ABC." "All right." "It's getting late in the show." "I think I'll just preassociate the names of the two most physically opposite Oscar winners" "I can think of and see if they appear." "Dustin Hoffman and Charlize Theron." " Good evening, Charlize." " Good evening, Dustin." "You're a good dancer." "Oh, my God." "A writer is inspired by a novel or article or seasonal film." "They take the germ of an idea, or the skeleton of a story, put it into the hopper and it comes out re-imagined." "Or sometimes they start completely from scratch, facing the terror of the blank page." "And they rely only on imagination." "The origins of many great screenplays are often a mess." "They might come from some inner light, or inner darkness or a writer that just needs a job." "But a good writer, the right writer, can hear, and feel, how to make a story come to life." "Here are the nominees for adapted screenplay." "Chris Terrio for "Argo"." "Based on a selection from "The Master of Disguise"" "by Antonio J. Mendez and "Wired" magazine about "The Great Escape"." "Lucy Alibar and Benh Zeitlin for "Beasts of the Southern Wild"" "based on the play "Juicy and Delicious" by Lucy Alibar." "David Magee for "Life of Pi"" "based on the novel by Yann Martel." "Tony Kushneror "Lincoln", based on "Team of Rivals"." ""The political genius of Abraham Lincoln" Doris Kearns Goodwin." "David O. Russell for "Silver Linings Playbook"" "based on a novel by Matthew Quick." "And the Oscar goes to..." "Chris Terrio, "Argo"." "This is the first Academy Award and Nomination for Chris Terrio." "Oh, I want to say I share this with the other people in my category," "Lucy and Benh and Tony and brilliant Tony, thank you for inspiring me." "Thank you, Ben Affleck." "15 years ago you were up here for the first screenplay you got made and now you made this film that's brought me up here and it's a gift and I can never repay it and thank you." "I love you." "I want to thank Warner Brothers, everybody at those house, George Grant, Nina," "I want to thank my mom and dad, my friends who prop me up every day in all this," "Josh Bearman and I want to dedicate this to Tony Mendez." "Years ago Tony using nothing but his creativity with six people out of a very bad situation and so I want to dedicate this to him and the people all over the world in the U.S. and Canada and Iran who use creativity and intelligence to solve problems nonviolently." "Thank you." "And now, here are the nominees for original screenplay." "Michael Haneke for "Amour"." "Quentin Tarantino for "Django Unchained"." "John Gatins for "Flight"." "Wes Anderson and Roman Coppola for "Moonrise Kingdom"." "Mark Boal for "Zero Dark Thirty"." "And the Oscar goes to..." "Mr. Tarantino." "This is the second Academy Award and fifth Nomination for Quentin Tarantino." "From his first Oscar in this category for "Pulp Fiction"." "That's cool." "Charlize is my neighbor." "Very nice to get this from you." "Thank you, Mr. Hoffman." "Boy, oh, boy, you know, I've been saying things like" "I want to be able to thank the actors for what they've done when it comes to my script and it's not just an easy thing to say." "It really is why I'm standing here." "I actually think if people are like knowing my movie 30 or 50 years from now it's going to be because of the characters I created and I really only got one chance to get it right." "I have to cast right people to make those characters come alive and hopefully live for a long time and, boy, this time, did I do it." "Thank you so much, guys." "Leo, you know I'm thanking him too." "Okay, I know I'm getting off but one last thing," "I would like to say it's such an honor to get it this year because I have to say, in both the original and the adapted categories, the writing is just fantastic." "This will be the writers' year, man." "Thank you very much." "I love the competition." "You guys are all wonderful." "Peace out." "Yes." "Coming up the award for best director and since we've now been here this long we'll start the 2014 Oscars right after this." "Welcome back." "Our next presenters are Hollywood legends going back to the '70s and '80s," "They remember when this town was nothing but cocaine trees as far as the eye could see." "It's late." "These two are the children of screen legends who then went on to become screen legends themselves which only goes to prove what everyone says Hollywood parents are the best parents in the world." "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Oscar winners Jane Fonda and Michael Douglas." "The stories these directors brought to the screen are as varied as the nominees themselves." "Whether American or foreign born, whether Oscar winning legends or first timers, whether bringing to the screen a fantasy, a tragic love story, a magical surreal world, a romantic comedy or a slice of history." "Their shared characteristic is their monumental and profound talent." "Here are the nominees for achievement in directing." "Michael Haneke, "Amour"." "Benh Zeitlin, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"." "Ang Lee, "Life of Pi"." "Steven Spielberg, "Lincoln"." "David O. Russell, "Silver Linings Playbook"," "and the Oscar goes to..." "Ang Lee." "Including this nomination for best picture for "Life of Pi", this is the second Academy Award Nomination for Ang Lee and his second Oscar win." "Thank you." "Thank you so much." "Thank you, movie God." "I really need to share this with all 3,000, everybody work with me in "Life of Pi"." "I want to thank you for..." "I really want to thank you for believing this story and sharing this incredible journey with me." "I need to thank Yann Martel for writing this incredibly inspiring book and everyone at Fox, thank you for taking the leap with me," "Specially Jim Gianopulos and Elizabeth Gabler." "My producers, Gil Netter, David Womark, David Lee." "Wonderful cast." "Suraj, where are you?" "You're a miracle." "He's playing the young Pi, carrying the movie." "Every one of you in the cast," "I cannot waste this time talking about them." "You're the golden statue in my heart." "I could not make this movie without the help of Taiwan, shout there." "I want to thank everybody." "There that helped us, specially my Indian crew, I love you." "My Canadian crew, I love you." "My family in Taiwan." "My wife Jane Lin." "We'll be married 30 years this summer." "I love you." "My boys, Haan and Mason, thank you for his support and finally my agent Karen Sage and Lawyer and Joe Dipaolo." "I have to do that especially for this movie." "Great to have your support." "Thank you, Academy." "Xie xie, namaste." "All right, coming up next three-time Oscar winner Meryl Streep and, yes, and the Oscars for best picture, best actor and best actress." "Will it be Quvenzhane Wallis who is 9, will it be" "Emmanuelle Riva who was 9 when this show started?" "Find out right after this." "We are back." "He delighted us in "The Artist" and pulled off a masterful performance without uttering a word." "Please welcome actor winner Jean Dujardin." "Bonsoir..." "Good evening." "If I were an actress, I would be passionate, sensitive, courageous, sexy," "complex, free, strong, funny, intense and graceful." "If I were an actress, I'd be an even better actor." "Here are the nominees for actress in leading roles." "Jessica Chastain, "Zero Dark Thirty"." "But the truth is, you don't understand Pakistan and you don't know Al Qaeda either give me the team I need, to follow this lead or the other thing you're gonna have on your resume... is being the first station chief to be called before a Congressional committee" "for subverting the efforts to capture or kill Bin Laden." "Jennifer Lawrence, "Silver Linings Playbook"" "You know what?" "Forget I offered to help you." "Forget the entire idea because I am so much crazier than you." "Keep your voice down." "I'm just a crazy slut with a dead husband." "Forget it!" "Emmanuelle Riva, "Amour"." "Drink it now." "There you go." "That's good." "Drink it." "Quvenzhane Wallis, "Beasts of the Southern Wild"" "Ye the man." "Who the man?" "I'm the man!" "Yeah, you the man." "Who the man?" " I'm the man!" " Yeah, you the man." "Who the man." "Yeah, you the man." "Naomi Watts, "The Impossible"." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you so much." "And the Oscar goes to..." "Jennifer Lawrence." ""Silver Linings Playbook"." "This is the first academy award and second nomination for Jennifer Lawrence." "She was previously nominated in the category for "Winter's Bone"" "Thank you." "You guys are just standing up because you feel bad that I fell and it's really embarrassing." "But thank you." "This is nuts." "Thank you to the academy and thank you to the women this year." "You were so magnificent and so inspiring and not just those of you in that category and it's been so amazing getting to know you and you've been so nice and made this experience unforgettable and thank you to the best producing team, Bruce That, Donna" "and Myan team IVPR and Bradley and our entire cast," "Chris, Jacki, Bob and our crew." "And my family..." "happy birthday Manoel." "Thank you so much." "Thanks." "Ladies and gentlemen, our next presenter needs no introduction." "Thank you..." "I'm walking on my dress." "This year each of the nominees for leading actors has brought to the big screen some of the most inspired and harrowing work that we ever seen in this category." "In a normal year, any one of these performances would have stood out as the most challenging, imaginative an ambitious of the year" "And so tonight the academy has had too the difficult task of honoring the finest among equals." "The nominees for leading actor in a motion picture are..." "Bradley Cooper, "Silver Linings Playbook"." "I'm not calming down." "I don't..." "I'm not calming down." "Anybody can wake up." "I'm not ashamed of it." "I'm not ashamed of it." "Let the whole neighborhood wake up." "I don't care." "It's my wedding." "It's my wedding video." "Daniel Day-Lewis, "Lincoln"." "Upon the world stage now, now." "With the fate of human dignity in our hands." "Blood's been spilt to afford us this moment!" "Now!" "Now!" "Now!" "Hugh Jackman, "Les Miserables"." "I'll escape now from that world" "From the world of Jean Valjean" "Jean Valjean is nothing now!" "Another story must begin!" "Joaquin Phoenix, "The Master"." " Do you love Doris?" " Yes." " Is she the love of your life?" " Yes, sir." " Then why aren't you with her?" " I don't know." "Yes, you do." "Tell me why you're not with her if you love her so much." "I told her I'd come back and never went back and now I just, I got to get back to her." " Why don't you go back?" " I don't know." " Why don't you..." " I don't know!" "Denzel Washington, "Flight"." "October 11th, October 12th and 13th and 14th I was intoxicated." "I drank all of those days." "I drank." "And accept." " On the morning of the accident..." " I was drunk." "And I'm drunk now." "And the Oscar goes to Daniel Day-Lewis." "Daniel Day-Lewis is the first actor to win three Oscars in the Lead Actor category." "I really don't know how any of this happened." "I..." "I do know that I've received so much more than my fair share of good fortune in my life and I'm so grateful to the Academy for this huge honor." "It's a strange thing because three years ago, before we decided to do a straight swap" "I had actually been committed to play Margaret Thatcher." "And... and Meryl was... was Steven's first choice for "Lincoln", and I'd like to see that version." "And Steven didn't have to persuade me to play Lincoln but I had to persuade him perhaps if I do it," ""Lincoln" shouldn't be a musical." "My fellow nominees, my equals, my betters," "I'm so proud to have been included as one amongst you." "When we got married 16 years ago or since we got married 16 years ago, my wife Rebecca has lived with some very strange men." "I mean they were strange as individuals and probably stranger if taken as a group, but luckily she's the versatile one in the family and she's been the perfect companion to all of them." "I'd like to thank Kathy Kennedy, our producer and through you Kathy and... and through you our mighty team of co-conspirators." "At the apex of that human pyramid, there are three men who whom I owe this and a greate deal more," "Tony Kushner, our beloved skipper Steven Spielberg," "and the mysteriously beautiful mind, body and spirit of Abraham Lincoln." "For my mother, thank you so much." "And now, ladies and gentlemen, here comes the big one." "Please welcome the star of "Chinatown"" ""One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest"," ""As Good As It Gets"," "And that the pardon, incomparable Mr. Jack Nicholson." "Thank you very much for that." "I don't suppose any of you have ever noticed that traditionally the best picture award is presented solo, probably because they want some guy like me messing around making comments about sequins, chiffon," "Rouge, ringlets." "However, tonight, it is my great pleasure to introduce live from the White House, the first lady of the United States," "Michelle Obama." "Thank you, Jack." "And welcome to the White House, everyone." "I am so honored to help introduce this year's nominees for Best Picture and to help celebrate the movies that lift our spirits, broaden our minds and transport us to places we have never imagined." "This has been an exciting year for movies, and I want to congratulate all the nominees on their tremendous work." "These nine movies took us back in time and all around the world they made us laugh, they made us weep and they made us grip our armrests just a little tighter." "They taught us that love can endure against all odds and transform our lives in the most surprising ways, and they reminded us that we can overcome any obstacle if we dig deep enough and fight hard enough and find the courage to believe in ourselves." "These lessons apply to all of us no matter who we are or what we look like or where we come from or who we love, but they are especially and for our young people, every day through engagement in the arts," "our children learn to open their imaginations to dream just a little bigger and to strive every day to reach those dreams." "And I want to thank all of you here tonight for being part of that vitally important work, and now I'm going to turn it back to you, Jack, to give us the nominees." "Well, nobody is going to mess around with that, are they?" "Well, let's recap the outstanding nine nominees for tonight's best picture." ""Amour"," ""Argo"," ""Beasts of The Southern Wild"," ""Django Unchained"," ""Les Miserables"," ""Life of Pi"," ""Lincoln"," ""Silver Linings Playbook"," ""Zero Dark Thirty"." "Mrs. Obama, do you have your envelope?" "Not yet, Jack." "I'm about to." "Good." "And now for the moment we have all been waiting for, and the Oscar goes to..." ""Argo"." "Congratulations." ""Argo" has seven Academy Award nominations this year winning three Oscars, film editing, adaptive screenplay and best picture." "I know you're thinking, three sexiest producers alive." "I want to thank the academy." "This is... this is..." "God, this is truly an honor." "There are literally thousands of people to thank so thankfully I'm not going to thank them now." "I'm going to thank everybody personally in the next few weeks, but there are a couple of people I want to acknowledge." "I want to acknowledge my partner in crime and my great friend, George Clooney, who... everybody should be so lucky to have a partner who is talented and as humorous and who has as much integrity so thank you, George." "I want to thank my beautiful wife Lisa, who... you make... you make everything better." "And to our kids Maya and Olivia," "I love you guys." "Hope your old man is not embarrassing you up here." "The reason I wanted to speak first..." "I want to speak for Ben was..." "Ben is a producer on the film and he is also our director and I thought it would be awkward for Ben to thank himself, but it's not awkward for me." "So on behalf of George and myself" "I want to thank you, Ben." "You directed a hell of a film." "Couldn't be more proud of the film, couldn't be more proud of Ben so, ladies and gentlemen, our co-producer and the director of "Argo"," "Ben Affleck." "Thank you very much." "Thank you very, very much." "I know eventually that thing will start to go." "Forgive me if this is quick." "I want to acknowledge Steven Spielberg, is a genius and a towering talent among us and acknowledge the other eight films." "There are eight great films who have as much a right to be up here." "Acknowledge them and thank them for what they did and many who didn't get nominated this year." "I want to thank, you know, I mean Jack and Marty and my brother and mom and dad and Patrick and Tony Mendes who let us do his story, thank you and I just..." "I'm going to thank everyone in the movie, worked on the MCHD, did anything with this movie gets thanked." "Canada and our friends in Iran living in a terrible circumstance right now and my wife who I don't normally associate with Iran, but" "I want to thank you for working on our marriage for you know, ten... it's good." "It has worked but it's the best kind of work." "There's no one I'd rather work with." "And I just want to say, you know, I was here 15 years ago or something, and, you know, I had no idea what I was doing." "Stood out here in front of you." "Really just a kid and I went out, you know, and I never thought that I would be back here and I am, because so many of you are here tonight because of this Academy because of so many wonderful people who extended themselves to me" "when they had nothing to benefit from it in Hollywood." "You know what I mean?" "I couldn't get them a job." "I want to thank them and I want to thank what they taught me which is you have to work harder than you think you possibly can, can't hold grudges, it's hard but you can't hold grudges." "And it doesn't matter how you get knocked down in life because that's going to happen." "All that matters is you got to get up." "I love you." "Yes!" "All right, folks." "We hope everyone had a great time this evening." "I certainly did." "We'll be back in a moment to say a proper good night but first here's who's paying for all this" "All right, there are a lot of winners here tonight but I know that there are also plenty of you who are disappointed or upset so we want to kind of cheer you up here so she opened the red carpet show" "and now she'll close with me because you're all sick to death of this guy." "The lovely Kristin Chenoweth." "How are you?" "Good." "We just want to say here's to the losers." "Yes, to the losers." ""Argo"." " "Argo"." "Come on!" " We love that "Argo"." " We do." " It's a long one." "Here's to all the losing works of art" "From Lincoln to Amour disappointed actors wondering what they dressed up for and how the real performance starts with phony smiles at the ball" "Here's to the Losers, Losers, Bless Them All" "Here's to nominee Quvenzhane Wallis Lift up that little head" "You'll be at the future Oscars When the rest of us are dead" "You have all Tom Cruise's talent" "And your equally as tall" "Here's to the Losers" "Bless Them All" "Oh, poor Bradley Cooper Get your chin off of the floor" "Here's your silver lining You'll do Hangover 4" "Thank you very much." "Good night everybody!"