"It's OK." "Mum's here." "Sorry for your loss." "Everyone handles grief differently." "And getting pissed and moving back in with her ex is her's?" "Oh..." "I want to be with you." "I want to marry you." "Prove it." "That's my house, you old bitch!" "I am not having a stag do." "Bastards!" "Fra-a-ank!" "Anyone watching, thinking we know fuck all about knowing fuck all about owt, needs to watch their back." "So you've had your Labour, reclassifying skunk, sending prices sky-high, literally - literally - taking the grass from its own roots!" "And now you've got your condemnation." "Liberals noshing Tories like altar boys picking dimps up!" "Have we had a national fucking stroke, or what?" "Is revolution a word or was it never?" "Anybody watching needs to know, we cope better than average with irony in Chatsworth." "Well, for fuck's sake we live in Manchester and they charge us for water." "I wandered lonely as a clown, necking mushrooms rarely found." "This green and pleasant land in ancient times." "Yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak!" "It's not theirs any more!" "This is our England now." "Pa-a-arty!" "(ALL) Ring a ring o' roses A pocket full of posies..." "Atishoo!" "Atishoo!" "We all fall down..." "'Each, and every one of us is a dot." "We're all tiny insignificant dots 'scabs and spots on the face of the planet." "'And we're only here for the blink of an eye." "'What we do in that blink is so important, not just for ourselves, 'but for others too." "'For our friends and for our families." "'We have to leave something behind, some trace that we were here." "'Like an astronaut leaves their footprint on the moon - evidence." "'Because if we don't, 'if we leave no trace, then it's like we never existed at all." "'Like we did nothing with our life." "'And if that thought hits you when you're croaking your last, 'in that split second before the lights finally go out, 'what happens if you realise you did nothing with your life?" "'You helped no-one, fought for nothing, changed nothing." "'What do you do at that moment?" "Do you live or do you die?" "'" "BEEPING" "Mam!" "What the fuck is going on?" "You'll be home before you know it." "As long as you take things easy." "Think you should take a back seat." "One of us'll look after things, till you're back on your feet." "Yeah." "OK." "Will you do it?" "Me?" "Mickey's looking after Cilla and Jamie's got his hands full trying to get Connor back." "Shane's not up to running things, Mam." "Sort your son out first, then we'll talk business." "Libby Croker." "Croker!" "Yeah, I'm calling to see if my partner Frank Gallagher has been admitted?" "If my partner has been admitted!" "Oh, no, please don't transfer me." "Has someone been using my toothbrush?" "Why?" "Gonna start charging?" "Why?" "Gonna start charging?" "Shut up!" "Both of you!" "I wondered when the old Libby temper would raise its ugly head." "Yes, hello." "Yes?" "I should've come down harder on her when she was a teenager." "He has long hair and a beard." "Like Gandalf on acid." "Just look where it's got me..." "He's 51, but probably looks a bit older." "You'd think there'd be a modicum of respect for the poor woman who brought her into this world." "OK." "Thank you for your time." "You're wasting everyone's time." "He's not coming back and you're the only one who's bothered." "(COUGHS)" "Fucking hell!" "I'm alive..." "S'good, I suppose." "Not as good looking this time." "Could do with a shave." "Lines, veins." "Older!" "Old..." "Old..." "Older..." "Older..." "What the fuck am I doing here?" "!" "And where is here?" "Get back?" "Back where?" "(ECHOING) Doctor!" "Doctor!" "Doctor!" "Quick, Doctor, do something." "The Cidermen are coming!" "(CRIES OUT)" "Wait for me!" "Hang on, hang on." "Fucking 'ell, this is a young man's game." "I'm fucked." "Where are we going?" "How the fuck would I know?" "You're the Doctor." "And who the fuck are you?" "!" "How the fuck did I get here?" "I was drinking, there was drugs." "Y'know, the usual day...night." "It was night time..." "A night out." "It was a stag night!" "Frank!" "Help me!" "I need to get back." "It's a trap, Doctor!" "Frank!" "(SCREAMS)" "(SCREAMS)" "(SCREAMS) (SCREAMS)" "Come on!" "Hiya." "Like a bad penny." "Oh, don't be mean." "I was about to come and find you." "Who's dead now?" "Fiona?" "I heard a whisper that Frank's missing." "Don't know where you heard that." "If Frank is missing, that means there's no-one here to look after the kids." "I'm here." "But you haven't got parental responsibility." "You're not really allowed to look after them." "Not legally." "Legality's never bothered you!" "Well, it does now." "Liam and Stella are my babies and they should be with me, with their mum." "Ooh!" "I told you we had to play the long game, didn't I?" "We'd have been waiting longer if it weren't for fags and chips." "Thank God for heart attacks, eh?" "I can say that, cos she's gonna be all right, in't she?" "Yeah." "A couple of days, she'll be back home." "There you go then." "Heart attacks!" "Heart attacks!" "Listen." "I've got a job on." "I can count on you, can't I?" "Yeah." "PERSON YELPING" "What in God's name..." "SCREAMING" "YELPING CONTINUES" "Help!" "Someone call the police!" "Help!" "What's going on?" "Did you get a good look at them?" "At who?" "Your attackers." "The attackers are in..." "Filth!" "Back upstairs, bitch!" "Time to play with the big boys again. 40 grand's worth of coke, two quid's worth of baking soda equals 80 grand." "Where did you get 40 grand's worth of coke?" "I deferred payment." "These suckers turn up with a bag of cash." "40 for the suppliers, 40 for us." "Easy money." "Yeah, too easy." "How do you know this ain't a set up?" "Couldn't have picked a worse place." "Public, cars, CCTV." "CAR HORN PLAYS TUNE" "Well, this just gets better and better." "Oh, wait in the car, will you?" "Everything all right, mate?" "Yeah." "Top." "You OK?" "Why wouldn't I be?" "I thought you'd be a bit happier, that's all." "First big deal." "Should be celebrating." "Yeah, great." "Let's have a big fuck-off party, shall we?" "Fuck off!" "Fuck's this?" "!" "Don't want any trouble, do we now?" "Just about to bring it in." "She might have good intentions." "She's got this money coming her way." "That's nothing." "18 grand's hardly nothing, Carl." "It is to her." "Won't last two minutes." "Ooh, thanks a bunch." "You can't just pick your kids up and drop 'em off when you want." "And you can't tell me what to do, cos you're not me dad!" "Libby's a million times a better mum than you." "You're not taking Liam and Stella away." "Look, there's nothing any of you can do to stop me." "It's the law!" "She's right." "Uh-uh, hold your horses." "Not yet, sweetheart." "I've got a lesbian wedding to go to in the Lakes." "They're gonna tie a ribbon around a pebble and then chuck it into the Windermere." "Then set off those paper lanterns." "Should be beautiful." "I love a good wedding, don't you?" "I'll be back in a couple of days." "If you could have their stuff packed that'll save time and that." "See ya. (CLICKS TONGUE)" "We have got to find your father." "I'm going to hand my notice in at Lillian's." "I'm married to the head of a family now, Capo di tutti capi." "I'm Carmela Soprano and I shouldn't be blowing fat, sweaty blokes for 30 quid a throw, when I could be helping you." "What do you reckon?" "Surprise!" "Why didn't you tell us you was coming home, Mum?" "Jamie wanted to surprise you all." "Been filling me in on the business." "Doing good, eh, son?" "Yeah, I thought it was a good time to expand." "Build on what we have." "Fucking hell, it's not The Apprentice." "Feast your eyes on that." "All Shane's work, the planning, the execution." "Good work, son." "You called?" "There wasn't a single penny in that bag..." "You brought Mum home, put on that big fucking performance and..." "You're not up to running the business, Shane." "Bollocks!" "This is about you not being the boss." "It's about the business and the family." "I don't want everything we've worked for pissed away." "Neither do I." "Where did you get the money?" "Fuck all to do with you." "It is if you're putting the family at risk." "A small-time loan shark." "Who?" "Chemical Mitch." "Fucking hell, Shane!" "I'm sorting it, all right?" "Laters." "You forgotten something?" "Not that." "Your sister!" "I thought you'd enrolled in college doing childcare shite." "A childcare and development course." "Only cos they had a free creche." "I thought with you being home..." "You thought I'd just waltz back in and pick up right where I left off?" "I've got me Turkish wrestling..." "I'm fucking convalescing, son!" "I stared death in the face." "I need rest and time to build me strength back up." "God knows, if I don't, I'll..." "Don't you worry, Mum." "I'm gonna be the best carer that Cilla could ever wish for." "You get some rest." "Backed up by researchers into child development." "The closer the mother - or father - they are to baby, it creates a stronger and deeper bond, yeah?" "I spent a year in Africa working with mothers and babies and it's really surprising to us as Westerners, but these mothers, they carry their children with them at all times." "Well, not that surprising, though, is it?" "They haven't got a choice." "They haven't got anything, have they?" "No prams or bouncy chairs, no shelves and that." "Shelves?" "Yeah, you know, to stick the baby on for a bit." "Right." "OK." "I'm hearing you." ""I hear you say."" "That's right, innit?" "OK." "I hear you say you think I'm unfit to be the mother of your child." "I fucking disagree." "I totally fucking disagree!" "OK." "I haven't finished!" "I think I am fit to be a mother, because" "I'm trying to protect Connor, which is why I don't want you to see him." "Bollocks!" "Sorry, sorry." "I don't trust you, Jamie." "What do you think I'm gonna do?" "Do a runner with Connor." "I wouldn't do that." "I hear you say..." "I hear you say you're not letting him see me because you think I'm gonna do a runner!" "But I say I thought that's why you're unfit to be a mother." "You're not allowing him to see his dad." "I don't give a fuck who's blood he's got, mine, Joe's, whoever." "I'm his dad." "I'm his fucking dad!" "Oh, come in, why don't you?" "You've called the council!" "What makes you think it was me?" "So what if I did?" "You drove me to it with the noise of your... fornicating!" "Jackson's a trainee teacher." "If you make official complaints, you'll cause a lot of problems." "For?" "Us." "Jackson could lose his job." "And we could lose our home." "We had a noise abatement notice at our last address." "Last three addresses." "So if I make a complaint, backed up with evidence, you could lose your job... and your home?" "Shane's decided to up the interest on everything we're owed." "He has to pay this money back somehow." "The people that owe us money are skint!" "They can't afford to stump up any more, so they'll turn to other crews." "We won't have a business left." "OK." "So what about this loan shark?" "Chemical Mitch." "Known for throwing acid and bleach around... not just at his enemies, but their wives, girlfriends, mothers." "A right nasty little fuck." "Don't think anyone would miss him, do you?" "Shane won't do it." "Like I said, he's not up to running things." "He thinks he is." "He thinks he is." "He's not!" "He's fucking things up." "And if he carries on like this, we're gonna lose the business, or someone's going to get hurt." "OK." "You're in charge." "Take over and sort it out." "But don't tell Shane." "You'll break his heart." "He's never been top at anything in his life." "When he was a kid and they were picking teams, he was always last, even when his own fucking brother was choosing." "Show him." "Do whatever it takes to make him realise he's not up to running the show, for the good of the family." "Maguire?" "Shaney, Shaney..." "Your idea's smart, get other people to pay for your fuck ups." "I like it." "I like it that much, I'm going to do the same." "Your debt's just gone up five grand." "Come on, girls." "Had to fight a dwarf for it." "But don't worry, he'll be fine." "Shh!" "Tomorrow's another day." "I can't breathe!" "I can't breathe!" "Sorry!" "I can't breathe!" "Sorry!" "No, no, don't stop!" "(YELPS LOUDLY)" "I can't...it's too good!" "Don't stop!" "Fuck me!" "Fuck me." "Fuck me!" "Frank?" "What?" "What is it?" "I went to the post office, right?" "He's drawn his benefits!" "So he's alive and..." "And he's not here." "Well, yeah." "'Go on...fuck me, fuck me, ahh!" "'" "Aah!" "Aah!" "I wonder why?" "Why do you think?" "He doesn't want to marry me." "Ye-e-e-e-e-eah!" "Yes!" "So Lillian says, "You're gonna have to work out your" ""notice if you want a reference", so I turned round to her and says," ""Lillian, love, I'm getting out of this game altogether."" "You left?" "Not till next Friday." "It'll be all right." "Won't it?" "I mean," "I know I'll be paying Chemical Mitch interest..." "Give over fretting, will you?" "This is Jamie's doing, this." "Give us a pull on that." "Thing is, he's dead fucked off, cos you're doing a good job and he's trying to mess with your head, that's all." "If he were brilliant, your mum would have made him boss, wouldn't she?" "But she didn't." "Who did she choose?" "You!" "Why?" "Because you're a fucking genius, that's why." "You're Tony fucking Soprano, eh?" "Anyone else remember the means their parents resorted to in the names of discipline?" "Please!" "We had to lick batteries." "PP3s for, like, small stuff." "But for bigger crimes, like nicking stuff what we shouldn't have nicked, we had to lick a fat one." "PP9s and car batteries for really big shit." "You're not seriously proposing this as a punishment for a child?" "God, no." "No." "Our mam did it to us when we was kids, but things have moved on, haven't they?" "I wouldn't harm a hair on a kid's head, me." "And me, a disabled pensioner!" "Walked right into my home, issuing threats, it's so upsetting." "Sadly, I don't have any hard evidence of their threatening behaviour, but maybe when you hear this, you'll appreciate what I've had to endure since they moved in." "MUSIC: "Poker Face" by Lady Gaga" "MUSIC CONTINUES" "We could say he's back, say he's in here." "We can't just give up." "I'm not giving up." "All we can do now is act dignified, not cause a scene." "For Liam and Stella's sake." "Fuck that." "Have they chucked you out of college yet?" "Have they?" "I'm studying, right?" "I have to develop strategies on dealing with problem kids." "Have you tried...?" "That doesn't involve licking batteries." "Rum." "My attempt to build a bridge." "I've let myself get carried away with my own pettiness." "You're decent people, and I really don't want to cause you any problems or have any friction between us." "That's very kind." "New beginnings?" "I hope you'll be happy in it." "Libby..." "I heard about Frank and the wedding and that." "I know what you're going through, cos it happened to me." "I'm sorry." "Thank you." "I did some snooping around." "Those Welsh blokes and Chemical Mitch, they're one and the same." "Chemical Mitch isn't Welsh." "No, the Welsh blokes work for Mitch." "Trust me." "They rip you off, Mitch steps in to lend you money." "You've been stung twice by the same outfit." "Nobody will think any less of you if you want to step down." "Nah." "I'll sort it." "Maguire?" "Mitch wants his five grand." "Now." "I'll pay him what we agreed when I get it, all right?" "Tell Mitch he can fuck off." "Stay out of it, Jamie." "Jamie?" "Nice pub." "Must've proper lamped you one." "Ah!" "F..." "Sorry." "Look I'm fine, cheers, everyone." "It's nothing." "PHONE RINGS" "Shane." "Jamie!" "Listen." "I'm in the boot of a car." "We're stopping." "Fucking hell!" "I don't know where the fuck I am!" "Just..." "Listen." "Help me, please!" "I'm going to find out what's what, where you are, and I'll be with you before you know it." "Just hang in there." "Make sure everyone gets a drink." "Calm 'em all down." "Drinks are on the house!" "PHONE RINGS" "Jamie." "Oh, fuck." "RUNNING WATER" "Fuck!" "Fuck, fuck!" "Aaaah!" "Argh!" "Argh!" "Argh!" "BOTH COUGH" "I'll kill him for this." "No." "I will." "What's the matter?" "Nothing." "Don't stop, please." "Jackson?" "Is there something going on?" "Or not going on?" "It's never happened before." "I know." "You can usually hang a towel off it." "Let's not make a big deal of it." "Don't want it to become an issue." "Just relax." "I'll do all the work, yeah?" "Just relax." "For fuck's sake, Jackson!" "Ow!" "Please stop." "No way!" "New beginnings." "Can I have some?" "The devious old..." "Please stop!" "I think it's bleeding." "(HUMS)" "DOOR CLOSING" "Good morning." "SEXUAL MOANING" "Oh!" "Ah!" "Ah!" "Ah!" "Ah!" "RADIO PLAYS MUSIC" "Oh!" "Oh!" "Oh!" "MOANING AND BANGING STILL AUDIBLE" "Ah!" "Ah!" "Ah!" "RADIO VOLUME INCREASES" "Oh!" "Ah!" "I died five times, literally died, five times." "I walked along the tunnel to the bright light." "You'll never guess who I met there." "Sidney Poitier." "Sidney Poitier appeared as the manifestation of our Lord and saviour," "Jesus Christ, and he spake unto me, me alone, and he said, "Mimi Maguire, it's not your time yet," ""go back, go back and tell Karen she should let Jamie see his son."" "Not my words, the words of our Lord Jesus Christ." "Is that the time?" "Thanks for coming." "Means the world." "Karen?" "Jamie is the father, isn't he?" "Who's Cilla's father?" "I've told Jamie to sort it out with you," "I know it's tricky with Joe and that." "Thanks." "Cheers." "If this is the bit where I'm supposed to say I'm sorry, that I went too far, etc, etc, you're wrong." "You're angry." "I understand that." "I know what I've done is..." "I just want us to move forward, somehow, you, me and Connor." "And what if Joe decides to come back?" "He's not coming back." "Ever." "He's dead." "How?" "So that's why you've come back, is it, because you don't have a choice any more?" "I always have a choice, Jamie." "I don't have to be here." "I fucked up, I know what I threw away, but I wanted out, and I chose to come back to you." "Now it's up to you." "This is your time to choose." "Eskimos?" "Inuits." "Eskimos." "Inuits." "To-mate-oh, tomato." "Go on." "I stayed with an Inuit community last year for several months, because I wanted to understand how families bring up children in a happy, peaceful, loving way in the midst of seemingly harsh environments." "And what I actually discovered..." "They don't know any different, do they?" "Eh?" "They're not going to cry or moan for an Xbox or a Wii or whatever, because they don't know what they are, do they?" "You don't grow up wanting something that you don't know about." "You grow up happy with the stuff you've already got, don't you?" "Well, yeah, yes." "It's a nice little piece, this, from Lithuania." "Couldn't point Lithuania out on a map, me." "CAR LOCK BLEEPS" "You don't have to do this, you know." "Wait a minute." "Softly, softly catches the monkey." "CAR LOCK BLEEPS" "I can't do it." "Fuck this!" "I knew it, I fucking knew it." "What?" "That you'd bottle it." "You're always like this." "You're your own worst enemy." "You've moaned all your life that something's not fair." "Never get picked for the football team, never get the decent jobs, never ***." "There's got to be some other way." "If you don't stump up the cash he's going to start fucking us allup." "Not just me, you and Micky, but Mam, Kelly, the whole family." "CAR LOCK BLEEPS" "He's leaving." "Come on, it's now or never." "Fuck it, I'll do it." "No." "Mitch." "Got something for you." "Shane." "Shane!" "Shane!" "You'll never step up, never be a man." "Let big brother do it for ya." "TWO GUNSHOTS" "Shane!" "GUNSHOT" "Finish it." "I fucking can't, man." "Fucking finish it, now!" "GUNSHOT" "I thought you were going to bottle it." "Didn't think you had it in you." "Is this what you do?" "Is this what you have to do when you run things?" "It's business Shane, just business." "Yeah." "Well I don't want it." "Not this." "Not like this." "You have it." "You run it." "I don't want to." "Where are you going?" "Shane!" "Shane!" "I've seen Harry and Larry nicking money out of my purse." "GIGGLING" "Well that's what it says, right." "Purse." "I haven't got a purse." "When I confront them, they deny it, adding lies to their theft." "What do you do?" "It's an hard one, this one." "Actually, it's fairly simple." "You challenge them." "You see, a child will build lie upon lie to create bigger, wilder lies until the whole web of lies collapses around them." "Leaving them feeling all humiliated." "And what do you propose, Michael?" "A PP9?" "Take them to the shop." "Oh, buy them a treat?" "Yeah." "Then go to pay for it and give it a big, "Right, I'll just open my purse."" ""Oh, no, I haven't got enough money." ""Soz I can't buy it you now."" "Cause and effect, innit." "You know consequences and that." "Have you actually got kids?" "I have children, yes." "You know, you travel all around the world, studying how other people bring up their kids and that." "Bet you hardly spend any time with your own." "Probably don't even recognise you." "Mrs Croker?" "Sorry to disturb you." "We, er, we just wanted to apologise for everything that's been going on." "It's all got a little bit out of hand." "Spiking our drinks and..." "I don't know what you're talking about." "We'd really like to put a stop to it." "Turn a page and start again." "And how exactly do you propose to do that?" "We'll look into some kind of soundproofing on our side." "And as way of an apology." "Oh!" "Thank you." "Love is a fecking wonderful thing, isn't it?" "These nature programmes... ..all the animals mounting each other, spreading their love." "I feel so...happy!" "College finish early today?" "Don't need that course any more." "Lecturer was a fraud." "She talked a good talk in her fancy Scottish accent, but she couldn't walk the walk." "I called her on her shit, caused a massive revolt." "You should've seen me, Mam." "You'd have been dead proud." "No need to worry about Cilla." "She's in good hands with me." "Where is she?" "Shit!" "I've left her on the bus!" "They should call this Britain's Got No Fecking Talent!" "Rain makes the flowers grow, you know." "It also makes us appreciate the sun when it finally comes out." "At some point in your life you'll think all it ever does is rain and rain, but you have to hold out because there will be sunshine in the end." "I promise." "Oh, dear." "All a bit sad in here, isn't it?" "Anyway, think we've got everything, 'cept the kids." "Leave her here and I'll come with you if you just leave her here." "Don't be silly." "Libby's a better mum than you'll ever be." "Liam!" "Liam!" "I mean it." "I'm your mum and you're both coming with me whether you like it or not." "You'll have to drag me kicking and screaming." "What's to stop me running straight back here with Stella?" "But the council won't give me that bigger place unless one of you come with me." "The council?" "This is about you getting a bigger house?" "It's got two toilets." "Unbelievable!" "Oh, get over yourselves." "Come on, Liam." "Stella or me." "You don't have to do this." "I do." "I'll be back as soon as she gets her house." "Take care of her." "I'll call you as soon as your dad gets back." "Scatter!" "Cheers, mate." "Nice one." "No probs." "Not so hard next time." "Later on." "Mate, calm down." "Jamie!" "It's going to be all right." "INAUDIBLE" "'It's business, Shane." "Just business.'" "What's the news with Karen?" "It's going to be a long haul, but it's good, yeah." "He must've sussed that Chemical Mitch's boys wanted shot of him." "So he got you to do it?" "Probably made up all that stuff about the Welsh Boys being in bed with Mitch an' all." "I could kill him!" "He did me a favour." "By almost drowning you?" "!" "He was born for this." "Scamming...scheming...killing." "So are you, sweetheart." "Nah." "Not killing." "It takes a certain kind of person to do that." "I'm sorry, Shane." "Hm?" "I pushed you, I encouraged you." "I was getting off on the idea of you being the boss." "And we're happy as we are, aren't we?" "'To taste death no matter how fleeting means you taste life 'in all its messy sweetness and fucked up bitterness." "'Death let's you appreciate life." "'Helps you realise what it's all about 'because at the end of the day, when all's said and done, 'and you breathe your last, 'that will be your evidence that you lived.'" "'The trace that you were here." "Your footprint on the moon.'" "'The people stood round your bed." "'Nothing else matters, does it?" "Just family.'" "We have to get back." "Go back in time." "Avoid the stag do, heal the rift and save Libby." "Libby!" "We have to get back to Libby!" "Quick, the turdis!" "Come on." "What the fuck?" "!" "Run!" "Frank!" "Libby?" "It's me!" "Don't, Doctor." "It's another mental trick of the mind thing!" "Why settle for her when you can have me?" "Frank!" "Come home, Frank!" "Who are you?" "Who are you?" "Libby." "Monica." "Sheila." "Your mother, your grandmother, your daughters, your fucks, your wallets and purses, doctors and nurses." "I am every woman and..." "I am Frank Gallagher!" "Libby's just getting over me dad doing one." "So not a word." "You're too old to be behaving like a teenager." "School contract's too risky." "And it's shit money." "It's payday." "Shane's raking it in at the school." "He wants me to do all these sick sex things with him." "I didn't know he'd be getting parole, did I?" "I get a cut of whatever you make out of the business from now on." "Fuck!" "Shane?" "Get everyone out!" "Fraaaank!"