"Get up there." "Good." "Lie down, lie down!" "Stay!" "Very good." "Look here." "Good!" "He's unlike any dog I've ever known." "I don't consider him a dog." "I consider him an actor." "You know, a little dog runs up, you pat him and his tail wags." "He jumps up and down..." "Eddie's not that way." "He's a very highly trained animal." "If you want to pat him, he'll let you do it." "But he won't do anything for you, unless you give him some liver." "So it's like working with another actor, as opposed to working with a dog." "Except, he's shameless in the scenes he steals." "He's the only real scene-stealer in our cast." "The rest of us give the focus to each other." "But Eddie couldn't care less." "He'll grab the focus whenever he can!" "That horny little mixed breed got my Phoebe pregnant." "Mrs Greenway, Eddie can't be the father." "He's been neutered." "Really?" "Well then, how do you explain these?" "Oh, my God!" " They're miniature Eddies!" " Aren't they adorable!" "I'm glad you think so because they're yours." "Bad dog!" "Look what you did!" "I'll take a long walk and I'm not going by myself." "He likes the rhododendrons on the north side of the park." "Damn it!" "Don't stare at me, Eddie. I'm humane but right now I could kick a kitten through an electric fan." "What are you staring at?" "You know why you're here, don't you?" "Listen, it's for your own good." "You'll be much happier afterwards." "You'll be able to sleep, run around with your little buddies, chase the birds, lick your..." "Did I mention sleep?" "You are not getting the rest of my scone, so forget it." "It's really good, too!" "Yum, yum, yum!" "Oh, all right!" "Here, get fat!" " Why do animals drag things in?" " Dear God!" "What is it?" "A rat?" "No, it's a stupid doll." "He found it in the park and carries it everywhere." "He never did this before you had him fixed." "Stop staring at me." "I didn't touch your doll!" "Look, even if it did." "I did it for your own good." "You were becoming the joke of the park." "Even the poodles were laughing at you." "What are you doing up?" "I reached over in my sleep and Eddie wasn't there." " You need a woman, Dad." " Tell me about it!" "Eddie!" "Daphne, get that hat off him." "It's bad enough he was neutered." "The way things are going, I don't think I'll have children." "Just let me dress up the dog." "I've never seen a dog look that stupid." "Wait till you see his St Patrick's Day outfit." "Look, everyone." "Eddie has found his inner puppy." "I just got one of my psychic flashes about Eddie." " Well?" " lt doesn't make any sense." "I'm getting a picture of Eddie sitting with Dr Crane." "For God's sake, Eddie." "I'm not going to do it." "No!" "What are you doing?" "That's disgusting!" "You filthy thing." "Get out of here!" "Daphne, I'm so sorry!"