"Heinz In the Moon" "Living at Erynnienstr. 11" "living at Andersenweg 6, 2nd floor" "and on the 3rd floor" "in other parts of the city are living" "Winnetou" "good morning, Miss Secretary good morning, any mail?" "here you are" "here you are thank you, Herr Kosemund that's too much honour just call me Arthur" "Wallenstein and the ..." "Book of Dreams" " What Sign Are You" "dreaming of "being tortured at a stake"" "means you'll get married soon" "coffee coffee no milk no milk" "honey honey faster the coffee's coming up" "I hope you had a restful night" ""Virgin" - saving a virgin dressed in white from mortal danger means:" "in the closet shirts are missing..." "Count them!" "Check with the servants!" "Aristides Nessel" " Erynnienstr. 11 - To the Nessel Porcelain Works inc." "Herr Aristides Nessel asked me to tell you that Miss Pythia will be here at 10.30 for a private conference then the mail won't be attended to?" "presumably, Miss Secretary what rubbish!" "how can a person belief such hokum!" "too much repartee too much repartee" "I'm against plural" "I love the singular" "I'm an aristocrat" "good morning morning" "I am to remind you of your visit to your factory how long haven't I been there?" "tomorrow it'll be six weeks golly!" "by the way, I'll keep the houses at the Fish-Market after all a pity, I've had them sold last week how could you!" "how could you sell them without asking me!" "I simply assumed your consent" "I see, then everything's all right the sale was very profitable, by the way otherwise, you would have lost at least 1/4 of a million of course, for that, you could never have assumed my consent" "then everything's all right" "Miss Busch yes?" "do you dream at night?" "no - a pity why?" "I've permitted myself to dream of you last night something nice?" "I've cut you off from the torturing pole and what does your dream manual say to this?" "it says, shirts must be missing" "I've already counted them five are missing so you think that Arthur ... possibly" "It was nice of you to cut me off." "don't mention it how did it happen, in fact?" "it went like this: you were dressed in white, a virgin, you know and those evil Indians, they shot at you with poisoned arrows" "But Siddie, what do you think you're doing!" "I'm practising, mama this afternoon, there's a shooting contest at the club but you couldn't possibly shoot at the valuable oil painting!" "go away!" "those old "hams"" "papa will be furious fabulous right in the muzzle that club!" "full of stuck-up women, just like you are modern amazons you'd better hunt for a man - but nobody will have you you'll never get a man, never!" "I'm telling you, papa has given up all hope don't be so untalented let me have it this is the proper way to brush a top hat tenderly very tenderly at the stock market, the shine of my top hat is notorious" "yes, Herr Fasan - don't curtsey a free person doesn't curtsey make a note of it" "are you blind?" "look at this!" "my trouser legs are full of dirt" "I look like a swine" " I beg your pardon don't beg my pardon, you're a free person, but see to it now!" "just forget it, stupid girl" "you parricideress!" "don't fuss, papa" "I'll disinherit you again?" "you'll make beggars of all of us what a wayward child" "I'm fed up with both of you you're nothing but wayward parents" "I'm going to Cleo" "Prof. Ass Specialist for nervous diseases # yes, t'is sad but true" "# yes yes yes ah yes" " good day, Miss - is Cleo in?" " no, she isn't doesn't matter wonderful!" "but Miss, the Professor is with a patient" "I didn't come here to see the "old nut-cracker"" "scientifically speaking, there is no cause for alarm, Madame first of all, you need calm and rest no upheavals, your soul needs to relax don't expose yourself to any shocks good-bye, Madame" "but Miss, you can't do this!" "yes, I can" "Emma, my smelling salts" "Siddie, how could you!" "I'm practising, for the shooting contest and you knock out my patient better than shoot them - by the way, nothing's happened" "Emma, where's my daughter?" "Mademoiselle hasn't come home yet but Cleo didn't go out alone?" "of course not, Professor, Miss Linck never lets your daughter go out alone" " Corinna?" " Yes?" "No other lady's companion has ever managed to stay that long." "but you mustn't start on that subject again has papa forbidden you to have a private life too?" "in a way, he has you're heroic!" "allow me" " why!" " you must excuse us please don't feel disturbed, the young lady didn't mean it personally everyone has a personal note, hasn't one?" " I'm always lucky with women - allow me" " all right, well ..." " excuse me you see, she didn't mean it personally come, Cleo come, let's leave this place come with me" "I've already healed the most complicated cases but with my daughter, all my medical skills fail" "I think your daughter's case couldn't be simpler as soon as your daughter knows her first real love, she'll get well" "I'll look around among my acquaintances only the prince is missing to awake the sleeping beauty with a kiss a man with a saviour mission" "my method is strictly scientific without any financial basis of course, when doing house calls, my costs have to be covered that goes without saying one moment, your hands very generous, very sympathetic, thank you do you have a deck of cards?" "please cut them the left hand on your heart three stacks ah, very interesting very interesting please concentrate think hard" "are you thinking?" "can you think?" "very good one two three - oh" "I see, you were born under the sign of Venus" "I thought so very nice very nice terrible something very serious is about to happen to you your whole life is at stake terrible, terrible because you're going to get married" "the torturing pole sorry?" "the torturing pole" "I see lots of women lots of women yes yes, you're a child of Venus, you are, sir blond, dark, brunette, what a heap, it's teeming with them, but halt!" "halt!" "the heap is thinning out a very strong personal note is working its way to the front and this is the one who will remain this single one very nice what covers them, what frightens then, what they don't miss, what stands at their side" "the horror: you'll have a terrible encounter, like a crash one moment now it's clearing up very nice, now listen:" "the woman you'll bump into today after I've left will be your life's companion by marrying her well that's enough for today if you have another question to destiny ... you have my phone no." "and also my bank account no., I hope good day" "the first woman I'll bump into ... by marrying her" "Arthur, where is my car parked?" "corner of Andersenstr., as usual and if I may say so, about that car accident the other day please no more ambulances please no more crashes on the contrary" " Herr Nessel, you must sign the letters - that can wait what is he up to?" "a crash" "Man, what are you doing!" "but you can't bump into my car just like that!" "pretty but we're fortunate don't keep me, sir, otherwise ..." "I'll shoot ah, the Indians allow me, Aristides Nessel of the Nessel Porcelain Works?" "yes mam. do you have parents?" "and how!" "I'd like to ask for your hand in marriage tomorrow morning" " for my hand?" " yes why?" "destiny wants it so but your factories are running smoothly?" "splendidly, I never pay any attention well, why wait till tomorrow?" "come and see us tonight, for a sandwich my parents will be happy" "Andersenweg 6, 2nd floor, take the elevator yes mam but don't get mixed up with the buttons for mezzanine there's "I", for the 1st floor "II"" "for the 2nd floor "III"" "good-bye, till tonight good-bye." "Halt!" "you!" "halt!" ""I" - 2; "II" is 3?" "doesn't matter, divine woman golly!" "excuse me back already, Herr Nessel?" "yes, I had a slight crash you're driving too fast, Herr Nessel but I didn't drive at all it went like this:" "because I just got ... uh ... well, for the time being I only know her street no." "good day" "don't eat the poultry with your fingers, Helene" "I've become engaged today what a bad joke you can't fool anybody anymore" "I've become engaged to Mr. Aristides Nessel what!" "the porcelain Nessel?" " yes mam" " Siddie, my child don't raise any vain hopes" "Nessel stocks are at 270 at the market is that a lot?" "a lot a dream" "it's all bosh you'll see" "Herr Nessel will come and see us tonight for a sandwich and will ask for my hand in marriage how do you mean, for a sandwich?" "Siddie!" "too kind, dear colleague so we'll be expecting the young man for supper yes. thank you good-bye, colleague" "Miss Linck" "Miss Linck prepare yourself for an experiment tonight for an experiment on love a young man with a saviour mission he'll join us for supper tonight if the experiment succeeds" "Cleo will be saved" "Prof. Rothenfuss didn't tell me the young man's name what shall I do?" "call him" "I'll call him" "This is Prof. Ass." "Can I speak once more to Prof. Rothenfuss?" "what?" "he just left?" "1 is "II", 2 is "III"" "3 is "IV", 4 is ..." "Prof. Ass Specialist for nervous diseases" "good evening - evening" " excuse me, am I expected?" " certainly" " is a grown-up daughter living here?" " yes of course" " then everything's all right - let me take the flowers this way please" "Herr Prof. Ass allow me" "Madame excuse me, sir, a mistake, I'm a widower allow me, Miss Linck" "I see too kind" "yes please?" "Emma, please put the flowers in a vase won't you sit down?" "my daughter will be here presently" "I hope the experiment will succeed experiment?" "I already regard myself as engaged do you object to me?" "not at all." "but you don't know Cleo yet ah, Cleo's her name a rare name fits the surroundings perfectly, by the way" ""rare" is the right word for Cleo you express yourself in a charming manner" "thank you" "I can tell from your face that you have a saviour mission" "I beg your pardon?" "there's Cleo" "for you this is Herr ... eh" "say something, Cleo" "I cannot speak when I'm overwhelmed with feelings" "I see that's exactly how I feel please" "you know ... of course excuse me a moment a patient, an urgent case, he's feverish" "your place looks nice the building, the surroundings are all the apartments let?" "all of them, of course" "Emma, put the flowers in a vase" "hallo this is Prof. Ass the colleague Rothenfuss hasn't come back yet?" "I'd like to know the name of the young man you sent to us does anybody know?" "but how am I to address him?" "don't you have any idea how to reach Prof. Rothenfuss?" "a fine mess, your practice, I'd like to be one of your patients there must be many families with children living in the building?" "not at all. what makes you think so?" "I've just done some fast combinations because I found an arrow in the elevator that's Siddie" "Siddie?" "yes, my girlfriend" "I see, your girlfriend." "and her name's just Siddie?" "her first name, of course her first name, of course" "Siddie with the arrow you see, it's my specialty to guess names shall I guess her family name?" "Siddie with the arrow" "I'm sure she's a Mexican let me see ..." "Siddie ..." "Siddie ..." "Siddie ..." "Caramba not at all." "Siddie has a family name she's always annoyed with:" "her name's Fasan [pheasant]" "Fasan that's a funny name, Fasan makes me laugh" "Siddie Fasan well, what did I tell you?" "you stuck-up goose seeing you, loving you, inquiring about you, and it's all over" "Aristides Nessel to become engaged to you?" "to you of all women?" "since Nessel stocks are at 270 he'll come. just you wait" " may I serve dinner now?" " yes - no!" " yes - stop it!" "I'll wait another 10 minutes." "I won't be starved because of you" "a miracle she doesn't kiss him the real and true love" "dear children who can that be?" "perhaps Siddie" "Don't!" "I couldn't bear to see another strange face we're sitting together so cozy right now" "I agree." "Siddie will turn everything upside down anyway" "Miss Linck, please answer the door and for heaven's sake, don't let Siddie in yes" "what is it you wish?" "I'm expected." "Prof. Rothenfuss sent me because of the experiment how embarrassing because the Professor has already sent another man what?" "I'll complain to the association" "I'd like to leave now but the evening's just beginning on the contrary" "it wasn't Siddie who was it?" "wrong number" "I see then I could stay some more" "my dear ... dear ..." "well" "What's your name actually?" "since you're part of the family now what family?" "of course, part of this family, that's right, part of this family what's your* name?" "[du]" "Ari ... all that ringing today" "tell Emma we're not at home, we won't open the door we won't open the door" "what's your name?" "Arthur heavenly and ...?" "why "and"?" "well, your surname" "Kosemund" "Arthur Kosemund operator operator, call again the Nessel residence somebody must answer the phone" "Herr Nessel is on his way rubbish" "you didn't even get a connection, I heard you of course." "what does it mean anyway: "on his way"?" "on his way from the Erynnienstr. to us it'll take him 7 minutes, ridiculous well" "I'm going to bed papa!" "he'll surely come yes, surely but not to us my compliments to the gentleman son-in-law mama don't pick your teeth" "I thought I was free person." "what's the matter?" "my dear, my good one here's something tasty a tasty little leggie something nice, something good take the dog downstairs, will you don't idle" " yes, Herr Fasan - let me, I'll go come, Rollo the fiancés have the honour:" "Cleopatra Ass" " Arthur Kosemund look here, Arthur no, nothing official please!" "I hate that but tomorrow we'll introduce you to the family must you?" "Arthur, please but no neighbours will be invited no, only close relatives and Genoveva who's she?" "this is Arthur pleased to meet you" "what is it you wish?" "is Herr Nessel at home?" "at this late hour, he isn't where is he then?" "well ... even if I knew I'm discretion impersonate" "I'm Siddie Fasan" "Arthur your master has promised to visit us tonight to become engaged then he'll surely come in such cases he always comes insolence!" "come, Rollo" "Rollo" "Emma, open the door for my fiancé here you are thank you" "till tomorrow, my darling tomorrow" "tomorrow at 8 o'clock" "a nice evening tonight spring" " here you go - after you" "Herr Nessel" "Nessel!" "only now you've come!" "two hours late?" "I had a terrible time with the porcelain, I ..." "I had to look after the porcelain a bit, then I wanted to get some flowers and ... all the flowers were closed, and I wanted to buy some, and ... all the flowers were closed, and ... and above all, I didn't know your name, Miss Fasan" "and how come you know it now?" "why?" "but you just mentioned my name" "I see, but above all, you neglected to tell me your name today at noon if you had mentioned your name, it would have been much easier to find you, Fasan because of my connections I was able to find the name, because I inquired," "and because of the sandwich, I've come here and ... if you permit, an occasion to spend the evening with me after all allow me, be so kind and ..." " charming - come, Rollo" "yes yes if Siddie really had caught that Nessel my position at the stock market would be 100% secure" "Siddie and Nessel did you believe this nonsense even for a moment?" "he's here who?" "well, he, he's sitting next door who's sitting next door?" "Aristides Nessel you must get dressed again at once" "what do you say to this, Helene?" "should we know joy with our daughter after all?" "I'd like to have a look at the idiot my parents and dinner will be here soon they've been starving because of me?" "that wasn't necessary" " I've mixed this cocktail myself it's called fire-water" "I see, the Indians why, Aristides?" "Aristides you've called me Aristides" "My name's Siddie" "Siddie." "that's nice too a rare name suits the surroundings" "Ari" "Ari, you're the man I've been dreaming of don't you want to kiss me for our engagement" "Siddie you woman!" "children, my good, my dear children my dear son-in-law" "Siddie, my good child allow me, Aristides Nessel" "Fasan, Frau Fasan" "Aristides" "Madame call me mama" "why don't you want to?" "it would be so nice tomorrow evening only a few friends, close relatives no, I've an important conference tomorrow, it can't be postponed, and" "I couldn't leave before 10 o'clock then drop by at least, even at 10.30 after all, one wants to show off the bridegroom to one's family by the way, let's put an announcement in the paper right now" "yes, "the fiancés have the honour ..."" "no, I don't like it, I don't want it, nothing official no, I don't want it, I don't want you to invite anybody if it must be, then invite only the closest relatives" "and nobody from up there, nobody from the building invite nobody but why not?" " why not, Ari?" "my best girlfriend lives above" " who is she?" " Cleo" " Cleo, that's a terrible name in fact, her name's Cleopatra that's even worse" " but this is nonsense - of course it's nonsense but I don't like nonsense good evening, Madame it really is nonsense till tomorrow, at 10, 10.30 I'll be here" "Dina, open the door for my fiancé" "well, isn't he charming?" "well, a bit crazy in the head but he's only marrying you" "Nessel stocks at 270." "ah, Herr Kosemund - you again?" "no, I'm still here but I let you out of the building an hour ago that is, I forgot something and ... what?" "I meant, I wanted to meet somebody, and I hid inside the building and ... and then you came along" "I?" "you're a crafty one yes, I'm a crafty one maybe we could see each other tomorrow, if you like" " with pleasure - allow me to take leave now" " good-bye - by the way, I've a favour to ask of you don't tell Genoveva whom?" "I mean, Siddie whom?" "I mean, Cleo don't tell Cleo" " good night, Berta" " Emma" "Emma, don't tell Emma!" "good night, Corinna good night" "Emma yes?" "come over here good evening well, we've had quite an evening at your place too?" "our Missus has become engaged with a certain Aristides Nessel now hold your hat!" "Cleo too to a certain Arthur Kosemund and what's more, but don't tell anybody, on your word of honour my word of honour that Kosemund has already flirted with me what cheek our guy is far too dumb for such a thing" "West-End 7778 what was that?" "Arthur, is that you?" "yes, this is Arthur yes darling, I'm floating so to speak in higher spheres" "I can't speak any louder, at any moment ... what?" "who's barking there?" "but who is this?" "this is your Arthur yes this is your Arthur of course your ..." "of course, darling, Cleo listen, I'll call you back later greetings to your papa" "I am what?" "of course I am. terribly happy terribly happy of course. kisses good day" "Arthur for how long have you been in my service?" "5 years how much is your pay right now?" "gross or after deductions?" "in total net 100" "150." "I thank you kindly." "what am I to do for this?" "I've become engaged" "I see why "I see"?" "the lady called here last night, she wanted to fetch you she called herself Siddie and bride the lady on the phone right now called herself Cleo she's a bride too but not mine but yours" "and the so-called bridegroom lurked in the hall and waited till Emma came down with Genoveva and then they rode the elevator, up and down, up and down all the time poor Cleo now that the Professor has finally got hold of a husband for her" "and already on the first night ... let everybody sweep the dirt in front of his own doorstep all men are alike, it's the same old story all over that's enough!" "what's the matter!" "Nessel stocks at 274 rose 4 points we have affairs of the heart too at the moment, she's called Lore one lends out one's own honest name enormous complications ensue one is being shot at how much pay did I say you're getting?" "160, wasn't it" "175." "please don't believe that I ..." "when love is involved, no ... you're wearing a nice shirt" "I used to have the same all right but if I may presume to give you some advice the situation is delicate too many brides" "Miss Busch" "yes please?" "this must be a mistake a lady would like to speak to you, Herr Nessel why not the lady said, she wanted to speak to her bridegroom did you become engaged?" " but this is ..." " you see no, I know nothing of the kind" "Miss Fasan a client of my mother's" "no, it's no use at all oh!" "did the lady say something a lady usually doesn't say?" "indeed she did" "Miss Bride isn't ladylike enough should I have told Miss Busch that I've become engaged?" "I don't think so in such matters it's better not to confide in the servants besides, your engagements may be over by then in fact, I think it's quite charming to be engaged twice" "Siddie" " I'm so happy - me too" " you must meet my Arthur - and you my Aristide his eyes intensely blue mine are too, but there's a bit of gray in them and he goes to such a tailor, my Aristides, well ... you don't say!" "you must tell me everything well, the bridegroom might have put in an appearance by now he could be here any minute he could. but will he?" "Nessel stocks ... at 275." "I always told you, get into the porcelain business porcelain never drops a pity that colleague Rothenfuss isn't here that he had to leave on a voyage he would be surprised how brilliantly his experiment has succeeded" "Cleo is besides with happiness you were right, colleague a man was the solution scientifically speaking, pure saviour material" "kids, stop that boring turning-round let me show you something now I'll put on a good old record listen to this" "what kind of savages are living above you?" "a doctor he finally managed to marry off his daughter and now the good people are ... performing dances of joy whom did the Ass daughter get engaged to?" "to a certain Mr. Kosemund. a very little man, he isn't even in the phone book by now Aristides might have come it's a disgrace it's a much bigger disgrace that the chandelier is shaking why don't go up to those people" " good evening, Herr Fasan - can I speak to the Professor?" " just go "calmly" inside" " I haven't come because of "calm"" "have you all gone raving mad?" "my ceiling is trembling!" "my chandelier is shaking!" "but Herr Fasan!" "we're celebrating a quiet engagement to Herr Kosemund." "Kosemund!" "That person introduces nice and quiet customs in here!" "I must have a look at him" "that's nice of you, Herr Fasan, that you've come up too good evening, Herr Fasan why haven't you brought Siddie?" "after all, Siddie has become engaged too but quietly, not so loud we're not performing Indian dances because of it like savages have you only come here to complain?" "indeed I have but this is mean of you, Herr Fasan!" "I'm a free person, Miss!" "evening" "excuse me a moment there you are at last, Ari just imagine, Siddie, I must leave right now" " my son!" " mama why must you leave right now?" "no, this won't do!" "wait at least till papa is here where is papa, by the way?" " he's upstairs and raising hell" " why?" " Cleo has become engaged to some idiot and now those stuffy little people are dancing like mad but my dear Ari, why must you leave?" "we want to introduce you to the guests now but mama, that's not possible, the conference is terribly important, I must get back right now just imagine, the capital will merge and the stocks will rise" "how tiring we can dance as much as we like, to our old records you stuck-up Great-Mogul, you!" "if you're not quiet now, you'll get to know Herr Kosemund!" "but I'd very much like to know him!" "where is he?" "where is he hiding, the legendary beast?" "Arthur!" "Arthur!" "don't tell me fairy tales all this is just hokum either you don't have a bridegroom at all or he's a coward and hiding" "Arthur!" "Arthur!" "Arthur!" "Arthur!" "what's the matter with that Arthur?" "what's so important?" "I'm telling you:" "if that trampling doesn't stop ..." "I'll call the police." "where?" "where?" "where's the scoundrel?" "Arthur, don't get violent!" "leave me, I don't know myself when I'm in a rage you don't know myself when I'm in a rage he doesn't know myself when I'm in a rage be reasonable, Arthur no, I want to castigate the fellow!" "castigate!" "Ari was here, but he's gone again he must raise his stocks even tonight that's what I call a man kids, those people upstairs, they must have acquired such an abortion for a son-in-law just imagine, kids, they didn't even dare show him to me" "we must have a look at the guy we'll lie in wait for him when he'll be leaving." "Dina, Dina" "Dina, come here put down the tray you stand guard at the door and watch out for Kosemund when he's leaving wonderful!" "run along!" "run along, Dina" "you just go to bed, Emma" "I'll give my bridegroom the keys, you don't have to stay up thank you, Mademoiselle no, that's mine you've lost, you didn't pay attention you're still so exited" "I'm not exited" "I never saw that Fasan so furious scientifically speaking, a choleric but I'm all calm now probably he's had no luck with his son-in-law" "I'm curious how he looks like me too" "now we'll have a look at the legendary beast come, mama" " are you sitting comfortably?" " wonderful wonderful, wonderful" "Emma has already been sent up to her room the gentleman is still upstairs" "Dina!" "my Arthur yes, my Si ... si si oh well, Cleo you splendid man of course my blood is feverish, yes mine too terribly hot today" "but he must pass by here well the separation is hard for me for me too" "I'd like to stay with you for hours that's not possible, papa is so strict farewell, Arthur soon our wedding bells will ring" "I feel so cold suddenly and just now, you felt so hot" "Cleo!" "where are you?" "do you hear?" "yes I see well, farewell" "I must tear myself away from you very fast" "golly!" "the guy wants to shirk just be calm, calm" "he's not going to escape us!" "get in also 4th floor?" "for the time being" "where do you want to go?" "I can go where I please, can't I that's none of your business" "I go where I ... get out!" "open up!" "Emma!" "open up!" "Emma!" "open up!" "so the ticket inspector after all" "where is the guy?" "well, which of the two was the Kosemund?" "one looked more horrible than the other none of them was a free person" "well, you're quite a guy yes, I am." "why?" "just a figure of speech say, I hope your ticket inspector is still alive oh, that one, he's fine allow me to take my leave now, I thank you kindly it's nice and quiet right now," "I'd like to profit by the occasion and get lost too any time, if I can be of service good-bye good-bye and many thanks you're welcome" "a view of the Venus - 10 pfennig a view of the Venus - 10 pfennig a view of the Venus - 10 pfennig" "a view of the Venus - 10 pfennig excuse me, may I ... you're welcome, thank you very much you must close one eye and the other eye, straight onto the Venus the Venus is beautiful, isn't she" "yes, I'm a godson of Venus myself a bit "hidden behind veils", isn't she [incomprehensible] hidden behind veils?" "I agree" "Fashion Salon "dernier cri"" "a bit pale in the face that's what I'm saying:" "she works the whole day, she exaggerates just imagine, Madame, early in the morning she gives gymnastic lessons then for two hours, she's private secretary for a rich eccentric in the afternoon she helps me out" "and in the evening she attends cooking class in a big hotel but I have fun doing it excuse me, Frau Busch," "Mrs. and Miss Fasan are waiting in the other dressing room they're all impatient please look after them after Miss Fasan?" "no thank you my dear Madame my dear Mademoiselle allow me, Busch my bridegroom" "Frau Busch, that's a charming model, could I have it?" "I'm afraid that won't be possible but you wouldn't want this, your fried Cleo has already picked it up that doesn't matter the friendship between Siddie and Cleo is a thing of the past" " but they used to be ..." " used to be, but not today the family is behaving impossibly, Frau Busch don't they, Ari?" "I don't know the people but of course you know them, darling," "I just told you about the awful noise upstairs last night just imagine, Frau Busch, it was terrible ..." "Siddie!" "Siddie!" "this doesn't belong here but I find it embarrassing don't you realize?" "but that's not the point, it doesn't concern them" " good day, Madame - good day, Miss Busch good day so you show up at our dressing room too let me introduce to you my bridegroom we know each other - good day, Herr Nessel you know each other?" "well, that's the girl who ... my secretary of the morning and whom do you employ in the afternoon?" "you." "then I've been talking to you on the phone this morning?" "I don't understand come, mama" "I don't think we'll find the right dress in here pardon!" "after all, I have a say on this matter too we'll talk later" "WE'LL talk later my dear Frau Busch, don't be angry, but my daughter is always so terribly excited when she's engaged good-bye, Frau Busch good-bye" "you can't drive away my customers, because of your private grudges this isn't done" "Here's Frau Busch my dear Mademoiselle, good day and Miss Linck too what do you say to this dress?" "just candy please sit down very pretty, I must show this to my Arthur he's my bridegroom" "Arthur ..." "Arthur" "Arthur, where are you?" "come here, Frau Busch and Miss Busch want to meet you come" "my bridegroom" "Kosemund, if you don't mind very pleased, Herr ..." "Kosemund" "I think I've seen you somewhere before" "I'll explain everything later" "Herr Kosemund!" "I beg your pardon?" "just imagine, Mademoiselle, the dress you picked up," "Miss Fasan wanted to have it too that's out of the question why not?" "the same dress in the same building?" "for two brides?" "that would be really impossible but that would be out of the question, that isn't done what if one of the gentlemen is mistaken about the brides and the apartments" "I heard something like that has happened before yes, I read about it too somewhere but shall we do the fitting now, Mademoiselle?" "yes, you'd better leave us now, Arthur with pleasure" "he's gone, he's gone you'll never get a husband, never!" "mama, he'll surely be here he's sneaked back to his secretary of the morning oh those women, those women!" "there are far too many on this earth, far too many good day, my child, where's Frau Busch?" "in the dressing room, at a fitting with a customer has Herr Nessel come back?" "I don't know, Mademoiselle" " good day, Siddie - good day, Cleo" "I'm here with by bridegroom and we're looking for ours like a pin (in a haystack) but it's no use anyway your bridegroom?" "well, one hears pretty things about him what do you mean?" "out with it!" "Arthur, where are you?" "where is the junior?" "where is the darling?" "where is the Arthur?" "we never get to see him only your Emma does, Miss Fasan the whole building knows about it already what does the whole building know?" "your Kosemund was trying to get into your Emma's chamber tonight that's a mean lie!" "you're nothing but a foul snake" "but my ladies, please show come composure" ""dernier cri" [final scream]" "Summons" " Fasan vs. Ass  Co." "re: damages and injury" "The Plaintiff has named you as a witness" "I got the same summons in both cases, this regards myself too many oaths - why?" "but you'll have to take the oath - yes hasn't Miss Busch called yet?" "she hasn't, since that spectacular day in fact, I find all three very charming" "I see, too much charm what do you intend to do, regarding your double summons as a witness?" "last night I dreamt of a three-headed cow what does the dream manual say to the cow?" "a great happiness awaits me after a severe trial, I think but I mustn't shirk any danger then you intend to appear as double witness before the court?" "but that's what the three-headed cow was about" " I'm warning you what you're planning to do is "witness bigamy"" "I haven't seen the Kosemund fellow yet what's his business here anyway, he hasn't seen anything nobody will ever get to see him" "I wonder if he exists at all huh?" "I wonder where Arthur is" "Arthur has been so nervous lately scientifically speaking, an interesting case, those erratic body movements those shifty eyes very interesting for a doctor" "hallo!" "why are you hiding?" "I can't bear to see those people over there." "I don't know myself in my rage, and then possibly you'll lose the case." "my dear Aristides, just keep your blood cool" "I can't see cool blood, that's why I left the brawl but there were only a few bruises yes mama, because I didn't interfere" "I don't know myself in my rage, you don't know yourself in your rage he doesn't know himself in his rage we all don't know ourselves in our rage, don't we and most of all, they don't know themselves in their rage" "but don't get exited, Ari but I must get excited, if I don't get excited now, it won't be any use then it won't be the right moment to get ... excuse me" " morning - there you are, Arthur high time, the other party is here already just be calm, calm come over here, so that the others can see you no, I can't bear to see those people" "you don't know me in my rage" "I could get violet with those people you're such a hero, how I admire you" "Nessel isn't here yet you'll see, he'll shirk and what statement could he make anyway, he wasn't there" "excuse me a moment the typical state of a nervous witness very exited good day, Miss Busch finally I've found you, I've been looking for you the whole time" "I'd like to tell you ..." "I'd like to explain to you ... it think this is quite unnecessary" "I just want to explain how I got into whole situation don't worry, Herr Nessel," "I won't make a statement against you, I'll refuse to give evidence are you satisfied now?" "no no, I wasn't talking about the case, I meant ..." "I meant ..." "Miss Busch ..." "listen to me" "Fasan vs. Ass" "but where's my bridegroom Aristides?" "the witness Arthur Kosemund" "the witness Aristides Nessel" "Kosemund" "Nessel" "Kosemund!" "Kosemund!" "Nessel!" "the witness Aristides Nessel the witness Anna Busch" "Karbusche vs. Niederow" "are you Nessel or Kosemund?" " is Miss Busch already inside?" " yes but we're waiting for Nessel and Kosemund" " have both not come yet?" " not yet hearings for Tuesday ..." "Fasan " " Ass" "what's going on in there?" "the parties are coming to a settlement" "On the occasion of my daughter Cleopatra's engagement to Herr Arthur Kosemund" "I request the honour of your company at a small party on Saturday, 16th June, at 8.30 p.m. at the Hotel "White Raven", blue room" "On the occasion of our daughter Siddie's  engagement to Herr Aristides Nessel" "I request the honour of your company at a small party on Saturday, 16th June, at 8 p.m. at the Hotel "White Raven", green room now the fruit is ripe what am I to do?" " don't go" "I shouldn't go?" "thus both engagements will be cancelled and you'll be a free person a free person isn't free, says my father-in-law which one?" "the father-in-law on the 2nd floor listen, there are so many beautiful hotels in town and they both had to pick the "White Raven"" "green room at 8 o'clock, blue room at 8:30 every respectable family celebrates their children's engagements parties at the White Raven don't go and first, break off the engagement - what about the three-headed cow?" "I mustn't shirk any difficulty" "I too had a dream last night - what about?" "it was raining macaroni" "I've already looked it up it means another raise of salary" "at least, your dreams are practical green room" "over there in the blue room there's the engagement party with 20 place sets and here in the green room the other engagement party with 30 place sets we must close this partition" "today, you'll be stepping out of the kitchen into life cooking and housekeeping classes are over now for the first time you'll be confronted with real life and you'll serve at those engagement parties what you have been cooking" "Miss Busch will stay here," "Miss von Vollker will take over the blue room" "Ladies and gentlemen, please take your seats at the dinner table a few are still missing, but "the early bird catches the worm"" "I wonder where Arthur is?" "I hope he hasn't forgotten his engagement party but papa!" "scientifically speaking, an engagement isn't the fulfillment of male desires this day is just a complex of beginning complexes" "Heinrich!" "just let me handle this, ladies and gentlemen the soup is calling however, the bridegroom's still on his way scientifically speaking ... if you please" "asparagus soup, Ari your favourite soup asparagus soup is a healthy soup why are you looking at your watch all the time?" "but you aren't at your wedding party yet but mama!" "Miss Busch!" "have you turned waitress by now?" "please sit down" "I couldn't possibly serve there, I know those people what business does that person have here?" "I don't know, but you mustn't call her a "person"" "Miss von Volkmer, one moment, would you change places with Miss Busch?" "you take over the green room, and you the blue one" "I hope nothing's happened to Arthur but no, he'll surely come" "I see, Miss Busch has been discharged already serves her right you'll stay!" "don't talk over your fish in my youth, a certain Herr Baldrian died at his engagement party, choked to death on a fishbone" "but mama!" "at the time, they served pike too, just like today raise your arms" "paging Herr Nessel a messenger from the stock market for Herr Nessel, he's waiting at the door he said you know why ... what's the matter?" "are they dropping?" "excuse me, the Nessel stocks must be backed-up right now the rival company wants to blast them who's exploding?" "shhh" "Martin, behave yourself but they were at 275 too late, next time come earlier" "there you are at last excuse me, darling, I got stuck in an elevator eat, darling, your favourite soup what's this?" "asparagus?" "asparagus again?" "I've been eating asparagus all day, all night, nothing but asparagus waiter please serve another soup" "I'm afraid that won't be possible, Mademoiselle then please the oysters" "Aristides has been staying away for quite some time" "I hope nothing's happened to him maybe they arrested him don't say aloud what I'm thinking" "the gentleman detests asparagus careful!" "careful!" "too much of a shock but what are you doing here?" "I'm keeping guard strange you seem to have many talents, Miss Busch she's learned that from Herr Nessel what do you know about Herr Nessel?" "paging Herr Kosemund, he's wanted on the phone" "Kosemund?" "here!" "who wants me?" " Buenos Aires - coming" "it's terrible, terrible, but I must see it through to the bitter end" "I mustn't shirk any difficulties the three-headed cow" " well, have you backed-up the stocks?" " yes, that's all I'm doing, backing-up now eat something" "now Arthur's dinner is getting cold a pity" "coming but the good mutton a pity, but I'm afraid I have to do some more backing-up yes, back them up, that's more important, that's much more important" " I see, serving the mutton twice - indeed" "Miss Busch, I must tell you something don't worry, I won't give evidence against you here either, just like at court you're my destiny do you still believe that nonsense in the dream manual?" "you're my destiny, I've been dreaming of you all the time anyway you don't know that yet" "I only bumped into the Missus with my car, you know but I really bumped into you, you know" " like it was prophesized - this is too much!" "you're my destiny" "I'm not interested in the twin firm of Nessel  Kosemund you're my destiny all the same!" "too much rage, but she can be had for a song why?" "Miss Busch is in love with you." "I see" " there you are at last - here I am, yes the phone call lasted a long time it was from faraway too, from across the ocean, and there was such a brawl in that phone booth I'm telling you" " well, that ocean - may I serve some more fish?" "but not with so many bones this time but you haven't eaten yet!" "but I have, right now ... and Herr Baldrian has already choked to death on the stuff he ate such a piece of fish, full of bones, I must tell you about it the boy had too much of it and off he went, right under the table" "excuse me may I remark something in our defense?" "too much honour please!" "my master is only here today to see the whole thing through to cut through the knot but we don't know how, yet" "Am I to help you with it?" "we both had something like that in mind" "this seems to be a case of mistaken identities why?" "he doesn't have a saviour mission" "I had thought of quite another man yes, I'm afraid he isn't right for Cleo" "this is too cumbersome:" "open up the sliding doors create a direct connection" "like a meek flower, straightening up again thus in our case where is Arthur off to now?" "after all, a bridegroom is allowed to take a leak for once for once?" "dear bridal couple esteemed guests" "allow me, without wanting to anticipate my next speaker to say a few fitting words:" "our esteemed, our dear Aristides the unblemished picture of a girl, smiling sweetly the view of a 100% young man full of hopes how does the poet say" "May has come the trees break into leaf two parents each fighting... eh harmonizing" "50 : 50 in the May of their lives, Arthur and Cleopatra found each other and from the May of their lives they are stepping into the Junius, as we Latin scholars use to say here you can, as the Frenchman would say," "quote le roi est mort [the king is dead] vive le roi [long live the king] or in a liberal translation our temperamental Siddie is thinking:" "love is dead long live love bravo ... bravo everything that used to be masculine in her, falls from her there's only one man for her, the only one if I spread out Cleopatra's childhood before you" "a blissful picture of light emerges even in her early youth like an arrow, Siddie advanced all her classmates and now, our Arthur Kosemund nomen est omen as we Latin scholars use to say a Kosemund* in the truest sense of the word [*fondling mouth]" "our Cleo will sip this ambrosia from Arthur's fondling lips" "bravo ... bravo" "and thus I raise my glass and I say:" "long may they live long may they live well, what did I tell you" "what are you bringing?" "the "bomb" [ice cream cake]" "I see, you're bringing the bomb and I'll blow up the whole thing" "and now ..." "I'd like to have the floor dear guests dear brides ... eh bridal bride the words of our esteemed previous speaker have shaken me, us to the bone but I have been the object of far too much praise, I don't deserve it" "no, ladies and gentlemen, the praise is due to the families who ... have taken me, a poor little man, to their generous bosoms." "I'd like to crawl into this curtain right now, because the honour was far too great and I cover myself with the curtain folds ladies and gentlemen, because I can feel it, this is the curtain of destiny" "I am standing right now at a decisive crossing of my life's paths two paths are opening up before me and my life's signpost is asking, is simply asking: where to?" "where to?" "you'll be interested to hear, right now, a third path has opened up for me torn this way and that, full of love - what's going on here?" "what's going on here!" "who's the rascal?" "what's going on?" "who did it?" "it's tearing apart it's torn" "now everything's all right what about the brides?" "but they're happy - happy?" "because they got rid of me but it has all been a mistake" "I didn't even know the name of the 2nd floor, and I was already engaged" "I only knew the button what button?" "1st floor "II", 2nd floor "III"" "and then those Indians it's all destiny but the two of us, we were destined for each other all the time definitely destined really?" "did you doubt it for a moment?" "let's get lost yes of course, let's get our coats" "Aristides Nessel and spouse, née Anna Busch" "Attention, I'll start" "one two" "the end Engl. subtitles: serdar202@KG"