"Well, class, your votes are in, and here's your new second-grade class President," "Nathan Explosion." "[ applause ]" "Nathan?" "Nathan, aren't you going to say anything?" "[ siren wailing ]" "Yee-ha!" "Whoo!" "I'm the lunatic of god's creation!" "Aah!" "TEACHER:" "Nathan." "Nathan, aren't you going to say anything?" "Aah!" "[ screaming ] [ coughs, whimpers ]" "# Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok #" "# Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok #" "# Dethklok!" "Dethklok!" "Dethklok!" "Dethklok!" "#" "A political crisis looms in Florida as Governor Kip Slaughter is on the ropes after making disparaging remarks against Nathan Explosion." "State holidays are not given out for nothing." "This Nathan Explosion is a rock musician, not a politician or war hero." "Any proposal for any state holiday concerning this man will be vetoed by me, I assure you." "I believe Nathan Explosion is a disgrace to the great state of Florida." "ANNOUNCER:" "Ladies and gentleman, this is -- this is the strangest sight I've ever seen." "The Governor is being hoisted into the air upside down." "Hey, Nate, they're gonna kill that Governor on account of what he said about you." "Goods." "ANNOUNCER:" "His daughter has just spit on him." "Man, I love chips." "CHARLES:" "The President would appreciate it if you could say something on national TV to save the Governor from having his head chopped off by your rabid fans." "ANNOUNCER:" "It looks like two men with machetes are..." "It would only take a second, and it would be a great political move." "I'm eating chips!" "It will only take a second." "[ groans ] God." "All right." "What am I supposed to be saying?" "Hey, what am I supposed to be saying?" "Hey." "Hey." "What am I -- [ grunts ]" "Oh, right, right, right -- the Governor." "The Governor -- he said that I shouldn't have a holiday or something." "[bleep] him, right?" "[bleep] that guy." "ANNOUNCER:" "Oh, my god." "I don't believe it." "I have never seen a sight like this." "[ gunshots, sirens wailing ]" "As the Governor -- tearing pieces off him." "And there is the name "dildo"" "written on the poor Governor's forehead." "A headless corpse." "Ladies and gentlemen, the Governor is dead." "Riots and violence have hampered the special election due to the murder of Governor Kip Slaughter." "Gangs of rabid fans are insisting on Nathan Explosion for Governor." "The, uh, Governor was murdered because of your remarks." "I didn't tell those guys to kill him." "Our fans, you know, they're -- they are crazy." "And loyal." "Yeah." "Why don't you take our side ever?" "Yeah, what about our feelings?" "So you feel bad about the Governor being ripped apart?" "No, we don't, but we feels bad about having to plays in humidity, 'cause you know it gets real balmy down there." "Yeah, it's hard to plays when your hands sweat." "[ chips crunching ]" "All right." "Well, you guys know that Florida is in a violent state of anarchy." "Any concerns?" "No?" "None?" "You, uh, still on that, uh, potato-chip kick, huh?" "Still just eating them potato chips." "[ chips crunching ] All right." "Well, uh, for the record, I tried." "...Iandslide write-in victory." "Nathan Explosion is the Governor of Florida." "Nathan Explosion -- the next Governor of Florida!" "Nathan Explosion -- Governor of Florida!" "Gentlemen, it appears that Nathan Explosion will be the Governor of Florida." "This is an outrage." "How can we stop this?" "Consider what the people would do, General Crozier." "I feel we should go to purple alert." "[ alarm blaring ]" "[ cheers and applause ]" "Can you imagine being Governor of that?" "I'd have to live in Florida." "I wouldn't tell that angry mob that you don't want to be Governor." "You know, uh, what they did to the last Governor." "[bleep], I'm [bleep]ed aren't I?" "Congratulations." "You's gonna be the real cool Governor." "Oh, [bleep] that, Toki." "Yeah, Toki." "Don't be stupid." "Being Governor's totally lame." "We don't fill out paperwork and fill out Governor forms and wear suits and ties like dildos." "No offense." "None taken." "Yeah, Toki." "You sees, you's a stupid." "I'm nots takes all that!" "You could be a real cool Governor what cares about peoples and does things to make stuffs better instead of complains about everything." "Complaining's cool!" "Complaining's totally awesome!" "You know, being Governor has its advantages." "You'd be quite powerful." "Oh, really?" "And I could just put all my friends in charge of everything and just rape and pillage the economy and line my pockets with money and go mad with power?" "You actually could do that, you know -- technically." "I want to be in charge of the National Guard." "Alright, you got it." "I wants to help people!" "You got it!" "I need a secretary!" "You got it!" "I want to be ambassador to China." "You got it." "I wants no part of this decomcrats governments!" "Dude, Skwisgaar, do you know that Florida has the highest population of old ladies and old-lady homes?" "You could be in charge of old -- you know what." "Then I wills be in charge of that -- thems old ladies!" "You got it!" "[ cheers and applause ]" "I swear to govern the [bleep] out of this piece-of [bleep] state." "Now let me hear your guns!" "[ gunshots ]" "Now I reallys gonna makes everything right and do something good for people." "But first I gots to get this office in order." "Moves that over there." "Not -- not there." "No, moves it there." "No -- there." "PlCKLES:" "As ambassador to China, welcome to my country." "And this is how we do it." "[ muffled speech ]" "Hellos, Ethel." "Hellos, Rose." "Can I buy us a cup of Metamucil?" "And I promise every Floridian that you will all be rich, because we're gonna print some more money!" "Why didn't anybody ever think of this before?" "TOKl:" "Not -- not there." "No, moves it there." "No -- there." "Not there -- there." "No -- there." "[ slurping ]" "Jumps out the window!" "Find me a paper clip!" "You do what I say, or I haves you all killed!" "Now [bleep] your pants!" "Toki, your boner is showing." "Dude, Chen Lu -- dude, don't worry." "Don't worry." "Don't worry." "She just O.D.'d, okay?" "She just O.D.'d." "She'll be fine." "Just leave her here." "Chen Lu!" "Help me out!" "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "Oh, my god." "She's dead." "[ alarm blaring ]" "ANNOUNCER:" "There's no cops!" "There's nothing to -- freaks are running around." "They're shooting people!" "PlCKLES:" "Nathan." "Nathan, we, uh -- we, uh, got ourselves into a little situation with a..." "lady." "[ gunshots ] [ speaking Chinese ]" "It's crazy out there." "Everyone goes nuts." "It's anarchy." "There's no police." "There are no police." "Guys, guys, this, uh -- this does not look good." "This does not look good for, uh, my, uh, administration." "I, uh -- where'd I put those chips?" "[ chips crunching ] [ up-tempo introduction plays ]" "# I'm having my cabinet schedule a debate #" "# The world will be our witness judged in eyes of hate #" "# I challenge the gods to stand their ground #" "# Taste my word sword in your filthy mouth # [ music continues ] [ thunder crashes ] # lmpeach god #" "# Now #" "# If we unite we'll take them down #" "# We'll use our strength #" "# We'll use our skill #" "# We will revolt #" "# And we will kill # # lmpeach god #" "# We'll cause a storm #" "# We will unite and crush the houses #" "MAN:" "It's a hurricane!" "NATHAN:" "Give me the weather bur-- bureau -- bur-eau." "But that's where we are, sir." "Excellent." "Outstanding." "Good." "I command you to destroy the hurricane." "Yeah, use your weather-controlling machines." "People can't destroy hurricanes, sir." "All right, uh..." "knock it off course." "Do that." "I'm afraid that's impossible, sir." "Damn it!" "We've tried everything." "Not everything." "[ beeping ]" "Well, not everything, I mean " "I mean, not literally everything." "Okay, well, I didn't mean literally everything." "Well, you said literally everything." "Have you used the Emergency Broadcasting System?" "I hates that thing -- the "be-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ep."" "Oh, yeah." ""be-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ep."" "No." "No way." "This has been a message from Emergency Broadcast System." "All emergency systems have been looted and destroyed, sir." "They stole the beep?" "How'd they steal the beep?" "People are so low." "What the [bleep] do you guys even do here?" "We name the hurricane, sir." "You name the hurricane?" "That's your job?" "What should we name this one?" "Name the hurricane." "Um...uh..." "How about, uh, Scrambles?" "Scrambles the, uh, The Death Dealer." "[ up-tempo rock music plays ] [ wind gusting, crowd screaming ]" "NATHAN:" "The lips are chapped." "I don't even care." "I just love eating chips." "Oh, uh, I am confident that I have left Florida in a much better place than, uh, where I found it." "Oh [bleep] you know what?" "[bleep] it." "I'm gonna get out of here." "My back's killing me." "Whoo-ee!" "[ gunshots ] [ groans ] [ tires screech ] [ coughs ] [ sea gull squawks ]" "Best [bleep] Governor Florida ever had." "[ gunshot ]" "Chirp."