"(MONITOR BEEPING)" "BURT:" "What the hell?" "Barricade?" "(SHRIEKER GROWLING)" "(GROWLING)" "(SHRIEKING)" "(THUDS)" "HARTUNG:" "Drop the weapon." "MAN:" "Back away from the bug." "Nice and easy." "You're holding all the cards, friend." "So why is the bull's eye on my chest?" "You destroyed valuable government property." "Government property?" "BURT:" "What the hell are you doing with a Shrieker?" "HARTUNG:" "I'm not at liberty to say, sir." "How many more of these do you have out here?" "I'm not at liberty to say, sir." "Do you realize how dangerous these things are?" "Yes, sir." "We've seen your video and read all available literature on you, of course." "And we sincerely apologize for what happened." "We should've had a guard further down that canyon." "But what are you doing out here, Hartung?" "I'm not at liberty to say, sir." "And the explosions I monitored, you responsible for those, too?" "I'm not at liberty to say, sir." "Exactly what are you at liberty to say?" "We can offer you a ride to the location of your choice." "I'll walk." "Give Mr. Gummer his weapon." "It's been an honor and a privilege to meet you, sir." "(COCKING GUN)" "You'll, of course, keep this under your hat." "Under my hat?" "I'm going to pull any string available to an American citizen to shut you people down." "Mr. Gummer?" "Mr. Gummer?" "Mr. Gummer!" "Are you sure El Blanco still lives here?" "Oh, absolutely." "Blows through town on a regular basis just to keep us on our toes." "(CHUCKLES)" "You're the only one who sees him." "None of the Graboid websites have reported a sighting for weeks." "MAN:" "Oh." "Hey, El Blanco's not molting, is he?" "BURT:" "Burt to Tyler." "Come in, over." "That's him." "Burt Gummer." "Come in, Tyler." "Do you read me?" "That's not Burt Gummer." "It's a recording." "You read me?" "Over." "Read you loud and clear." "You got a minute to chat with some of my paying customers?" "Negative." "We have a Shrieker incursion in the vicinity of Snakebite Canyon." "What?" "That's not possible." "I mean, is it?" "It is when the Shriekers are aided and abetted by an unnamed entity with possible government affiliation." "Uh, come again?" "I'm calling a town meeting for 1900 hours at Jodi's." "I'll provide details then." "I'll spread the word." "Space blankets for everybody, right?" "Roger." "I'll notify Rosalita to put away her cattle." "Burt out." "The sanctity of Perfection Valley is being violated." "Our rights are being trampled by whoever is inflicting these Shriekers on the valley." "That would be me." "Although, I don't like to think that my research is being inflicted on anyone." "I'm Dr. Megan Flint." "I'd like to apologize for not notifying you about our project." "Your timing is perfect." "You've been monitoring our communications?" "No." "I wanted to return these." "But you really did bring Shriekers into our valley, like Burt said." "Yes, but..." "ROSALITA:" "Oh, man." "No way." "You are wrong, wrong, wrong." "This valley is protected by the Department of Interior, which means, you gotta go." "Chiquita." "I understand your concerns, believe me." "But I am operating under... (WRIST-SEISMOS BUZZING)" "(RUMBLING)" "(GLASS SHATTERS)" "Okay." "He's out of range." "Caught a burro this afternoon." "Should be fairly mellow for a few days." "(PANTS)" "I certainly understand your sensitivity to dangerous creatures." "But, as I was saying, we're not some renegade operation." "We're working with full cooperation of the Department of Interior." "In fact, they're funding my tests in Snakebite Canyon." "What are we, a bunch of guinea pigs for those guys?" "How many Shriekers are there?" "Only three." "There were four." "Where'd they come from?" "Lucky chance." "A Graboid was discovered in the Sahara just as it was about to metamorphose." "The resulting Shriekers were captured." "We arranged to purchase them for study." "We're going to turn them into a force for the good." "Come on." "These are Shriekers." "No, please, just listen." "We're training them to use their heat-seeking ability to locate victims in earthquakes, mining accidents, urban disasters." "I know it sounds weird, but my dream is to revolutionize rescue and recovery operations." "They don't detect heat if it's hidden behind objects." "Normally, no, but these do." "We've trained them to recognize even indirect sources of infrared radiation." "Oh, brave new world." "You do know that even a handful of Shriekers could turn into a whole army just by eating enough." "Of course we do." "Their food intake is closely monitored to prevent reproduction." "What happens when they morph into Ass-Blasters?" "These can't." "We've arrested their ability to metamorphose." "We've designed them to be used safely in any situation." "Put them on silk sheets or in the fires of hell, they're still killers." "Burt, give it a rest." "DR. FLINT:" "These animals are completely under our control." "Each has a microchip implanted in its cerebral cortex." "A remote unit sends constant signals to a receiver in their neckbands that moderates their aggressive behavior." "Only thing's ever moderated a Shrieker's behavior was a bullet." "Burt." "Mr. Gummer, I'm trying to save lives." "That's my only priority." "(THUNDER RUMBLING)" "DR. FLINT:" "Thanks for everything." "(SIGHS) Turn off the paranoia just this once, would you, please?" "Paranoia?" "How about common sense?" "When have I ever been wrong about Shriekers?" "Yin and yang, Burt." "Yin and yang." "It's about exchanging a negative for a positive." "Murderous Shriekers for lifesaving Shriekers." "And I think that woman deserves a chance to try." "(SIGHS)" "Well, if I was a Shrieker, that Dr. Flint could damn sure make me sit up and beg." "(MIMICKING DOG WHIMPERING)" "No consorting with the enemy." "I'm just talking." "I'm still on your team, all right?" "(MIMICKING DOG WHIMPERING)" "(SHRIEKER GROWLING)" "(PEOPLE CHATTERING)" "MAN 1:" "No." "MAN 2:" "Take cover." "(GROWLING)" "(MAN SHOUTING)" "(ROARING)" "MAN 3:" "They're out front!" "HARTUNG:" "The generator just blew!" "There's no power." "Move it!" "Move it!" "Lightning hit the BMU." "It's fried!" "Look out!" "(SCREAMS)" "Over there." "Dairy's most vulnerable to spoilage." "Don't neglect the beer." "It tastes funny if the storage temperature changes too often." "Jodi, I think we're out of dry ice." "You know, it's not like I didn't beg you all to install backup generators." "Burt, now is not the time." "Seems like now is precisely the time." "I suppose Rosalita ignored my advice, too." "That's because your advice got lost in a rant." "All of a sudden you were railing about FDR bringing electricity to the American farms." "And enslaving the farmers to the big utilities." "Well, look who's here." "Bet you're sorry you don't have one of those little watches to warn you when I'm coming, huh?" "A little Twitchometer." "(LAUGHS) What the hell is your department doing to us?" "Yeah, Shriekers, explain that." "Hey, my hands are clean, guys." "That came from upstairs." "And you didn't tell us." "Thanks a lot." "Well, they are under control, right?" "Of course." "Not that it's any of your business in the first place." "We live here." "Everything that happens is our business." "Well, if you're so interested, Gummer, why don't you come up there and check out that site with me?" "What's the catch?" "(STAMMERING) Probably nothing." "Which usually means something." "What is it?" "(CHUCKLING) Well, uh, I got a call from those Shrieker folks last night, and there seems to be a little problem related to the storm." "And then the radio went out and... (TWITCHELL LAUGHS NERVOUSLY)" "The possibilities for disaster boggle the mind." "Let's get up there." "For God's sake, Burt, not everything is DEFCON 5." "Why the hell bring them to our valley?" "Well, the topography, the climate, the isolation." "Pretty much the same reasons you like it." "You realize they've been setting off explosive charges?" "You approved that, too?" "Well, they need to blow stuff up to get fresh debris for the Shriekers to practice digging in." "It's all very scientific." "Good Lord." "(SCREAMING)" "Thank God you're here." "All three Shriekers broke out of their cages." "Shriekers, on the loose?" "(SIGHS) It was a freak accident." "Lightning hit our BMU and..." "Your what?" "Behavior Modification Unit." "The Shriekers immediately reverted to their natural behavior patterns." "You didn't have a backup?" "Of course we do." "Our tech support specialist has it in his vehicle, but he was off getting supplies last night when the radio went out, and worse luck, our walkie-talkie is out of range." "Three watts, most likely." "Mine is six." "Here, see if it improves your luck." "Otto, this is Dr. Flint." "(WALKIE-TALKIE EMITS STATIC)" "Otto, do you read me?" "Please, come in, Otto." "What's your part in this disaster?" "I'm Dr. Flint's senior advisor." "Harold Baines." "Any other survivors?" "We're hoping that Hartung, our security chief, escaped." "At least we haven't found any remains." "Otto, do you read me?" "(WHISPERS) Damn." "I can't reach Otto." "We have to find him." "Megan, he would have answered." "I'm afraid he's dead." "So, uh, you think we should be standing around out here in the open?" "I mean, shouldn't we, like, get the hell out of here?" "Absolutely." "My vehicle is just down the arroyo." "Your Shriekers have already had a lot to eat." "It's worse than that." "They also consumed their whole month's food supply." "Thirty sheep." "If they ate that much, they're not only off and running, they're off and multiplying." "Their reproductive rate will be exponential." "All points come in, we have an emergency." "Red alert." "Repeat, red alert." "Burt, you got Nancy." "ROSALITA:" "Rosalita here, Burt." "TYLER:" "Tyler here, Burt." "What's up?" "We have Shriekers on the loose." "They've killed almost everyone up here." "And they will be multiplying." "Are these the same Shriekers that Dr. Flint was talking about, the tame ones?" "Tame no more, Nancy." "Tame no more, and on a rampage." "ROSALITA:" "That's it." "I'm out of here." "I'm going to Bixby." "JODI:" "Me, too." "TYLER:" "Whoa, guys." "No, you're not." "It rained last night." "That means the road to Bixby is under five feet of water." "Exactly." "The only place you're going is my place, pronto." "I'll rendezvous there with you by 1730." "ROSALITA:" "In English, Burt." "JODI: 5:30." "Now, get going, and be careful." "Burt out." "BURT:" "Unprepared for electrical storms." "No backup unit on site." "So, what are your credentials for doing something as risky as this?" "In spite of the circumstances, Dr. Flint is one of our finest young scientists." "It's all right, Harold." "We'll have to do some damage control, but this project will succeed no matter what Mr. Gummer thinks." "Know-nothing know-it-all." "Where is he?" "This is so stupid." "We're waiting outside." "We could have hid in my store." "If I could move out of here, I'd be gone yesterday." "Take it easy, Rosalita." "If Burt's anything, he's reliable." "Why do you stay here, Tyler?" "You could sell your tour business and in a second be gone." "Well, you know, as scary as this place gets, it keeps my adrenalin pumping." "(NANCY EXCLAIMS)" "Let's go, people." "Inside, on the double." "Shriekers wait for no one." "Like we don't know that, Burt." "Let's go, let's go, let's go." "BURT:" "Step lively, people." "The door locks behind you." "Oh, great." "My housewarming present." "Goes nice with Burt's decor." "Reminds me of the holding cell in Tijuana." "Spring break '77." "BURT:" "Better take a look at this, all of you." "I'm downloading infrared satellite imagery to locate the Shriekers." "They've moved out of Snakebite Canyon." "Heading north, toward Perfection." "There's so many of them already." "Forty." "Forty?" "So far." "Man, worse than rabbits." "Curious." "They've separated into three groups." "DR. FLINT:" "I'll bet each group is being led by one of my Shriekers." "Very likely." "The longer they live, the smarter they get." "If they keep finding food, in a few days there'll be hundreds of them, then hundreds of Ass-Blasters." "You up for that level of damage control?" "Instead of listing our problems, shouldn't we be coming up with solutions?" "I already have." "We happen to be in a perfect situation." "Uninhabited area, secure defensive position." "All we have to do is use their natural heat-seeking abilities against them." "Turn predators into prey." "Pardon me." "What's he up to?" "Even after all these years, I haven't got a clue." "(WHISPERING) We've gotta do something." "We can't let him kill our Shriekers." "Megan, those three animals slaughtered men who had enough firepower to win a small war." "And now they've multiplied?" "Gummer may have a point." "TWITCHELL:" "Oh, boy." "Gummer and gasoline." "Not a good mix." "NANCY:" "I think we're gonna be bait." "I'm setting a fire outside." "Then we simply wait for those heat-seekers to come running." "What?" "Then you mow them down like some video game?" "Uh-uh." "You can't." "Whatever you do, those first three Shriekers have to survive." "Yeah, Burt." "She is doing important work here." "So am I. Trying to save our lives." "She's trying to save lives, too, but with you, it's always overkill." "Shoot first, and then shoot later." "I am never without a battle plan." "Really?" "You blew up your own house, for God's sake." "I didn't create this problem, Nancy." "But it seems I am the only one with a solution." "All right, let's go." "This ought to register on their heat-seeking organs." "It'll be the hottest thing for miles." "Like moths to a flame." "Big, nasty, ugly moths." "Burt, you sure this is gonna burn long enough to lure them all here?" "I got more." "A thousand gallons, underground tank." "Wouldn't wanna run out, would you?" "Come and get 'em, suckers!" "Mission accomplished." "Let's see if those puppies take the bait." "Is that the fire?" "Yeah." "As seen from outer space." "It's too weird." "Some guy's headed this way running for his life!" "Wh..." "What?" "Help!" "It's your security man, Hartung." "Thank God." "I've got the door." "Look out." "There's a Shrieker right behind him." "HARTUNG:" "Open up!" "Open the door." "(SCREAMING)" "(SHRIEKER GROWLING)" "You know the drill." "I do, indeed." "Please, can you at least not shoot the three wearing neckbands?" "Did you see what just happened?" "Any Shrieker we meet is going to be toes-up." "Damn right." "I am down with that." "Burt, give me a gun." "That one." "Come on." "I can hit anything with a 12-gauge pump." "I believe she could." "It's yours." "I'm sorry." "This has been years of work." "And I'll never get a chance like this again." "Harold, what are we gonna do?" "It's a meltdown." "At $3 million apiece, those Shriekers can't be replaced." "Maybe if one of them survives, they might let us continue." "Otherwise..." "Okay, Burt, I'll take them from the left, you got the right." "Affirmative." "Rosalita, any target of opportunity." "(BEEPING)" "They're coming from the west." "Oh, right, right, right!" "Holy freaking hell!" "There they are!" "Let me see!" "(SHRIEKER SCREAMING)" "(GROWLING)" "There's one coming up the backside of the hill!" "Oh, my God, he's tearing through the fence!" "Burt, he's behind you!" "Burt, heads up." "Behind you!" "(GROANING)" "Got him." "Thank you." "DR. FLINT:" "Did you see any of..." "Damn it!" "That's the one that came up behind us." "We couldn't very well blow it a kiss." "The longer they live, the smarter they get." "And any one of these SOBs that poses a threat, buys a ticket to Shrieker hell." "Any one." "TYLER:" "Two groups left." "Looks like one group spotted the fire, headed this way." "Coming to meet their maker." "ROSALITA:" "Better not find my cattle." "Jurassic Park wannabe bastards." "OTTO:" "Anyone, anyone there, please answer, any channel." "It's Otto, our tech support guy." "He's alive?" "Otto, it's Flint." "Where are you?" "What happened?" "Over." "There's Shriekers all over the damn place." "I've been pinned down for hours." "Couldn't get to my walkie or my van." "What the hell is going on?" "They got loose, killed everybody except Dr. Baines and me." "Now listen, we need the other BMU." "Do you have it?" "Is it okay?" "Yeah, it's right here." "You've gotta get it to me as soon as possible." "We're at Burt Gummer's place." "It's marked on your topo map." "But be on your guard." "There's still two packs of them out there." "They'll focus in on your engine heat." "Over." "Negative." "My van's electric." "Designed not to put out heat." "I'll be fine." "Out." "TWITCHELL:" "They're, uh..." "They're getting closer." "(LAUGHS) I mean, that's them and this is us, right?" "Shouldn't you guys be, like, loading up or something?" "Can you wait just a little?" "Sorry." "Otto is on his way." "He's got the Behavior Modification Unit." "The Shriekers are here now." "Can't let them proliferate." "Otto, come in, this is Flint." "Do you read me?" "Otto, come in." "I read you, Doctor." "I've gotta save at least one of my microchipped animals and I think I know how to do it." "You have a flare gun in your equipment, right?" "Yeah." "Good." "Then listen closely." "JODI:" "I hope they don't shoot them to pieces." "Burt always shoots them to pieces." "Why does it matter?" "Well, I could keep them in formaldehyde and we'd have ourselves another tourist attraction." "You shouldn't be here, Jodi." "You should be off somewhere running a multi-national corporation." "You wanna run up there and pick yourself up a couple of fat ones?" "JODI:" "No." "I think I'll send Twitchell." "TWITCHELL:" "Sorry, ladies, it's against regulations." "(WHOOPS) Round two, huh?" "I count an even dozen." "DR. BAINES:" "Megan, what are you doing?" "JODI:" "Oh, my God!" "(ALL SCREAMING)" "(COUGHING)" "(AMMUNITION POPPING)" "TYLER:" "What the hell?" "Is that Twitchell with a gun?" "No, that's ammo cooking off." "TWITCHELL:" "All right, as soon as it's safe," "I'm gonna get us out of here." "Let's see here, uh..." "Okay." "Try the other one." "Try the green one again." "What about that?" "Yeah." "NANCY:" "Okay." "Try..." "Try that again." "The magazine is reinforced so the fragments all go up." "TWITCHELL:" "Gummer!" "BOTH:" "Burt!" "We can't get out!" "Damn it, Gummer, we can't open the door." "Closes automatically in case of fire." "(GRUNTS)" "30.06 slug is jammed in there." "Door's wedged tight." "For God sakes, Megan, you've crossed the line." "You had no right!" "You deliberately destroyed my ammunition?" "You had to be stopped." "I had to be stopped?" "You are crazy." "What is wrong with you?" "You're certifiable, lady." "No, listen." "The BMU will be here any minute." "I'll take control of my last Shrieker, the others will follow him, and I'll lead them away." "TWITCHELL:" "Hello!" "JODI AND NANCY:" "Burt!" "Hit the actuator release switch, right on the door frame." "I am." "It doesn't work." "BURT:" "Well, don't worry." "You're all right." "It's the safest room in the place." "Yeah." "Frigging safe room." "How the hell long we stuck in here?" "If you really want out, there's an escape tunnel." "It lets out way down the hill." "'Course there are Shriekers, so you might wanna wait." "Meanwhile, chill." "How the hell do you know about that?" "I used it once in an Ass-Blaster invasion." "Damn three-ring circus all the time around here." "Give it a rest." "Let's just make the best of this." "(CHUCKLING) Oh, I'll make the best of it." "You damn door!" "Open the door!" "NANCY:" "Twitchell!" "Open the door!" "NANCY:" "Twitchell!" "(PANTING)" "(EXHALES)" "Sorry." "Just not really big on being trapped." "(SCOFFS)" "ROSALITA:" "You see anything?" "DR. FLINT:" "Nothing on the horizon so far." "I'm just saying it's overkill, you know." "I mean, the guy's whole life is overkill." "(STAMMERING) I mean, who do you know that has a steel door that closes automatically and traps you in here like a rat?" "What are you, some kind of paragon of normalcy?" "(CHUCKLES) Compared to him?" "Compared to any of you?" "Yeah, I get the Normal-of-the-Year award." "Trust me." "Are you gonna keep doing that?" "Yes, I am going to keep doing that." "I need something to focus on, to keep from freaking the hell out." "Just asked." "The last group's coming, and us, without ammo." "(BEEPING)" "I'm telling you, we're okay." "Yeah, if your friend ever gets here." "TYLER:" "And if he doesn't, your modified Shrieker will find us down here, right?" "You trained him to find body heat even underground!" "Great." "Burt, you gotta have more bullets somewhere." "I know you." "No way did you just keep bullets in one place." "Correct." "My backup magazine is in the safe room." "(SPEAKING SPANISH)" "Otto, come on." "So, you're normal because you wear a tie when it's 110 degrees outside." "You hate your job, you hate your boss." "But your biggest fear is that you'll get fired." "Hey, not all of us have the option of staying home and making little plastic monsters to sell to tourists." "Ceramic figurines." "Whatever." "I chose this life." "I chose not to live by the rules." "You could do the same." "I could." "But I chose a wife and kid." "And taking care of them is more important to me than some dream job or a sailboat or a house in Big Sur where I can sit around and play my guitar all day." "You play guitar?" "Yeah, I just..." "I just bought this Martin 12-string." "It's... (CHUCKLES)" "Yeah." "Yeah, I play a little." "(CHUCKLES)" "Okay, okay, so we've gotta get into the safe room." "The door, as you might expect, is designed to withstand hours of dedicated assault." "Do you have to build everything like a fort?" "Focus, Burt." "You know there's a way." "You've just overlooked one of your backup plans." "Twitchell, listen up." "You see the actuator that drives the bolt on your side?" "What the hell's he talking about?" "There!" "That lock thing up there." "Yeah, Burt, we see it!" "The mechanism's bound up." "Can you pry the door loose a little bit?" "Use a crowbar, anything." "Yeah, all right, all right." "(GRUNTS)" "All right." "(GRUNTING)" "TWITCHELL:" "It won't budge." "'Cause it's a Gummer kind of door!" "(ALL SNARLING)" "(GROWLING)" "(HORN HONKING)" "It's a van." "This must be Otto?" "I'm gonna lead them away from you." "Get ready to run for your vehicles." "This damn well better work." "(SHRIEKER GROWLING)" "(PANTING) Is the BMU on?" "Fully functional." "Where's a heat wand?" "I need a heat wand." "Now get ready to drive." "I'll get him to follow us and the rest will follow him." "Are you sure we wanna do that?" "I gotta get them away from those people." "It'll work." "Go." "Okay." "Okay, big guy." "Right this way." "(SCREECHING)" "Otto." "What?" "His receiver isn't on." "What?" "His chip's not responding." "The storm must've fried it!" "(SCREAMS)" "(OTTO SCREAMING)" "DR. BAINES:" "My God." "My God." "We're on our own." "(ALL GASP)" "Here comes the last group." "Okay, the ammo's behind that door." "We gotta get to the safe room!" "Any luck with that door in there?" "ALL:" "No!" "The actuator's jammed tight." "They'd need a cutting torch or explosives or..." "Jodi." "Jodi, Nancy, Twitchell, listen up." "Proceed to the ammo chest." "It's directly opposite the bathroom." "Get out a concussion grenade, a bullet-puller, a case of 30.06 ammo." "Then look for a proper container." "Gummer, you don't start speaking English," "I'm gonna come through that door and deck you." "Quiet." "I'll explain each step." "We're going to make a bomb." "(SHRIEKERS SNARLING)" "They're sniffing." "They're finding us." "They're finding us." "We need more time." "Gotta buy time." "Come on here, positive energy." "We're in Burt's house." "Burt's!" "There's no way we are weaponless." "Yeah, right, Tyler." "(ALL EXCLAIM)" "(TYLER GRUNTS)" "(SHRIEKER GROANING)" "ROSALITA: (PANTING) They're digging." "All of them." "The modified one, they're learning from him." "As I tell anyone who will listen, the longer they live..." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "They get smarter." "We get it." "Hey, hey, hey, hey." "Wait, wait, wait." "Put handles on these heaters." "Any Shrieker poking his beak where it doesn't belong gets more heat than he was seeking." "I like that." "TYLER:" "Baines, come here." "Keep working in there." "Tape the concussion grenade to the base of the container." "That's your primer charge." "This is a safe room, right?" "Now, it has to be centered for better ignition." "Uh, and you would know that how?" "Oh, it was the '60s." "I had radical friends." "Okay." "Twitchell, come on and help me." "Hold it here." "Hold it." "All right, all right." "More?" "That's good." "That's good." "Yeah." "Yeah." "(ALL EXCLAIMING)" "DR. BAINES:" "Oh, no!" "There's another one!" "Damn." "Shorted the generator." "(GENERATOR WHIRRING)" "Backup backup generator." "(SHRIEKER SNARLING)" "A little 110 in the face, they finally get the message." "They're gone!" "They're all gone." "About time they wised up." "Trust me, you do not want them to wise up." "Oh, come on, Burt." "At least they're giving us a break." "Yeah, I'll feel a lot better when I get my hands on some ammo." "We seem to have driven them off for the moment." "How you doing in there?" "It's in place." "Right where you said." "All right, now be very careful." "Once you pull the pin, you have only five seconds to get into the escape tunnel." "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." "Let's just get this over with." "Ready, Nancy?" "(ALL SCREAMING)" "They came up the escape tunnel." "Bastards." "We gotta get them out of there, now!" "(ALL SCREAMING)" "Get ready to run!" "Gonna blow the crap out of it!" "Okay!" "(ALL SCREAMING)" "(EXPLOSION RUMBLING)" "TYLER:" "Oh, my God." "BURT:" "Wait... (TWITCHELL COUGHING)" "(WINCES)" "Tour jeep's right over there, folks." "I'll be with you directly." "Man." "Never seen it like this." "(BURT CHUCKLES)" "I hate to say it, but those Shriekers were good for business." "Was a bad idea from the get-go." "Don't believe in rescue Shriekers, huh?" "Come on, Burt, I'm kidding." "Jeez." "Burt." "Burt." "I've got something I want you to look at." "Yeah?" "We left your house in such a mess last night, I was thinking..." ""A single man's rustic retreat"?" "I think not." "(SIGHS)" "Come on, Burt." "I'm trying to apologize here." "(SIGHS) I said some things at your place last night." "It wasn't fair." "Apology accepted." "But..." "But seriously, Burt." "It wouldn't take much at all." "A few white-washed walls, a little recessed lighting, a nice leather sofa." "It's an opportunity to make your place so much more attractive." "Attractive to whom?" "Other people?" "Old friends dropping by, long-lost relations showing up." "An endless stream of overnight guests?" "Why don't I just open up a bed and breakfast?" "(ENGINE STARTING)" "Socializing." "Community." "(LAUGHING)" "Oh, yeah." "Good thing you didn't mention the throw pillows." "(SIGHS)"