"♪ Iron Invader ♪ Original Air Date on February 12, 2011" " sync, corrected by elderman " "Hey." "How's it looking there, bro?" "Well, that depends." "Do you want the good news, or the bad news?" "There's good news?" "No, actually that's the bad news" "No good news?" "There's no good news." "Why do you got to ask me that and get my hopes up?" "Relax, it's just a figure of speech." "So, how bad is bad?" "Well, if my math is correct..." "That is a big if." "Like I said if my math is right, we're about 3 grand in the hole." "Holy cow!" "3 grand?" "3 grand." "I don't know how we're going to buy the window casings or the gutters." "What do you mean?" "We don't have another grant payment coming?" "Not until we finish this room, which we can't do without more money to buy more supplies." "Just put it on the credit card." "The credit card?" "Ethan the credit card has been maxed for weeks." "I say we cut our losses, get out of this sink hole." "You're kidding me, right?" "We're halfway done, we can't stop now." "Not to mention the fact that Mom and Dad devoted their lives to this." "Get your head out of your ass!" "I thought that's why we were doing this." "Holy cow." "It's not that bad, it's not the end of the world." "I'm talking about that!" "There's something falling from the sky." "Wow." "What the...?" "Better call the Sheriff!" "What?" "Aghhh!" "There!" "Cool." "This is awesome." "It's like a spaceship or something." "It's not a spaceship." "Look at those weird symbols on the wreckage." "It's Russian." "A Russian spaceship." "It's not a spaceship you big dork." "Well, what is it?" "I don't know, probably a satellite." "How do you know?" "I saw this thing on TV once." "Hundreds of them floating up there sometimes they stop working and they crash to Earth." "Think Greg Oropolus knows?" "No, looks like he slept right through it." "Figures." "What do you reckon we do with it?" "I don't know, I guess we should call the Space Agency or the Feds or something." "Why?" "So we can get full body cavity searches?" "Okay, well what do you want to do with it?" "Sell it." "Satellites are worth a lot of money." "It's junk, Ethan." "Who's going to want to buy junk?" "Earl." "I've got a tarp in the back we can wrap it all up in." "What the heck is that?" "Beats me." "Maybe it's one of those giant gorilla things you put on car wash roofs." "Would you take your car to a place that had that on the roof?" "I guess not." "What's up guys?" "Morning Max." "Can I get you some coffee or something?" "Yeah, coffee would be great, thanks man." "Damn Earl, what the heck you making?" "Oh, that there, Ethan, is what you call an Iron Golem." "An Iron what?" "An Iron Golem, it's from Jewish folklore." "Certain rabbis used to create these giant servants to protect the townsfolk." "You mean like a scarecrow?" "I'm building it for the town centennial." "Going to be a surprise." "Yeah, it's definitely going to be that." "Beautiful, ain't it?" "Oh, it's definitely unique." "Yeah." "Yup." "Definitely." "Unique." "So, what brings you boys out yonder?" "I've got something I want to show you." "Well, what you got here?" "A satellite." "It crash landed on Greg Oropolis's place this morning." "It's Russian." "You don't say?" "Old Greg Oropolis, he don't want it?" "Finders keepers." "I'll give you 200." "I was thinking more along the lines of 2000." "What are you, nuts?" "It's just a pile of scrap metal!" "The heck it is, that's genuine space debris, Earl." "Yeah, and there's gold and silver in some of that metal too and you know it." "Okay, I'll give you 500." "1500." "Well, I tell you what." "It's only because I like you boys and that's the only reason." "I'll go to 800." "800 sounds pretty good." "Well don't look at me like that." "800 bucks is a good deal." "I mean it's Russian space junk not even made in America." "I could have gotten him up to 1000 if you hadn't jumped in!" "I would have covered all the gutters." "Yeah, but whose idea was it to sell it?" "Spare me, Einstein." "Holy cow." "I didn't know she was back." "Neither did I." "You okay, bro?" "You look like you just saw a ghost." "Aren't you going to go say hi?" "What for?" "What for?" "Are you kidding me?" "The love of your life just walked by!" "That was a long time ago, Ethan." "Exactly, so why are you still holding a grudge." "Go get the gutters, okay?" "♪" "Max!" "I need a refill!" "Alright." "You're out of beer, Grandpa." "You want me to go into town and get you some?" "Do bears crap in the woods?" "I'll take that as a yes." "That boy." "Lover boy." "Shut up, go." "Just get the gutters, would ya." "Amanda." "Jake." "Hi." "So, when did you get back into town?" "A few days ago, staying at my Aunt's." "I've been meaning to call you." "Okay, sure." "Come on, of course I was going to call you." "Just getting settled in." "And having a bit of culture shock coming back to Redeemer." "I can imagine." "So, who is this lovely young lady?" "This is my daughter, Claire." "Hi, Claire." "I'm Jake." "Hi." "Hi." "I'm an old friend of your moms." "What do you think of our little town?" "It's okay, I guess." "Takes a bit of getting used to." "I bet it does, it must be a really big change for you, huh?" "Yeah, it's the smallest town I've ever seen." "Yeah, it might be but it's also what makes it so special." "I'm going to go wait in the car, Mom." "Nice to meet you." "Nice to meet you too, Claire." "Seems like a great kid." "She is." "And things are good for you?" "You're still working as a biology teacher, right?" "I'm getting a divorce." "Wow, I'm sorry to hear that." "You guys seemed like the perfect couple." "Well, we were at one time." "That must be pretty hard for Claire I guess, huh?" "She's hanging in there." "Mom, lets go!" "You guys moving back here then?" "No, we're just staying with my Aunt until I can figure things out." "Right." "I think Claire would go crazy if we stayed here." "You never know." "She may grow to like it here." "Well, I should get going, my Aunt's expecting us back." "Right, okay." "It's good to see you, Jake." "It's good to see you too, Amanda." "Wait a sec, would you like to maybe get dinner sometime?" "I don't think so, Jake." "I think I really need to spend some time alone, you know?" "I understand." "It's okay." "But if there's anything that I can help you with, anything at all, just let me know." "That's sweet, thanks." "I'm sure we'll bump into each other again." "I'm sure we will." "Bye." "See ya." "♪" "Alright, lets get your hand on you." "There we go." "Ohhh!" "Woo hoo!" "Yee ha!" "There you go baby, go go go." "What?" "Oh God, not now!" "Oh for the love of God." "Alright." "What did I do this time, Lord?" "Aargh!" "I'm still waiting to hear how it went with Amanda." "I told you." "I don't want to talk about it." "Did she say how long she was here for?" "Not very long." "Look I put aside a little money for Greg Oropolous." "Greg Oropolous?" "What for?" "As a finders fee." "He didn't find it, we found it!" "Yeah I know we found it, but we found it on his land." "You're right Jake." "Poor guy's been having a harder time than us." "That's why you're the big bro." "Whatever." "Sarcastic." "Don't burn the place down." "I'll just keep working." "I doubt that." "Grandpa!" "Grandpa!" "You okay?" "What happened?" "I think so." "Somebody knocked me out and stole my statue." "What?" "How could someone have taken the statue?" "Well you can see it's gone, can't you?" "Alright, come on, let's get you inside, we'll call the Sheriff." "You alright?" "♪" "Alright." "About time we got a little action." "Pow!" "Watch out man." "Only in Redeemer." "Sheriff, come in." "Well I hope you've got something exciting because this is turning out to be one very boring Saturday night." "I just received a call from Earl up at the scrap yard." "Well, better than nothing." "What is it this time, kids throwing fire crackers in his yard?" "No sir, someone stole one of his metal sculptures." "Who would want to steal something made of junk?" "Did you get a description of the thief?" "No sir." "Says they knocked him out cold before he could see who it was." "Uh huh." "Really." "What does this sculpture look like?" "He says it's 17 feet tall and weighs about a ton." "17 feet tall and weighs a ton, you need a tractor trailer to steal something that big." "I imagine so, Sheriff." "Uh huh." "Well I guess we best keep our eyes peeled for large vehicles moving through town, huh?" "Copy that sir." "This is a bad idea, Grandpa." "Those thieves couldn't have gotten very far." "There's only one road out of this town and if we move fast we can catch them." "I just really think you should let the Sheriff handle it." "That flat foot can't even handle an old lady." "Now lets go get the bastards!" "No, no, you need to calm down." "Okay, take a breath, have a seat," "I'll get you a beer or something." "Are you chickening out on me, son?" "No, no, I'm not." "I just think we should wait for the Sheriff." "Alright." "I'll catch the bastards myself." "Grandpa." "They're long gone." "Hi Ethan." "Amanda Spelling," "I haven't seen you in ages." "You look the same as when I left." "You haven't aged a bit." "Still got your baby face." "You're still just as pretty." "I hear you're some smarty pants Science teacher." "You could say that." "I came by to see Jake, is he around?" "You just missed him." "He should be back soon, if you want to wait." "I could get you something to drink." "I'm sure he'd love to see you." "No, it's alright, I have to get back to my Aunts." "You should have seen his fe when he saw you today." "Like he'd seen a ghost." "Poor guy, I came to apologize." "Apologize for what?" "I could have been nicer." "Seeing your high school sweetheart after 16 years when you're going through a nasty divorce is not the best timing." "Don't worry about it." "He knows you're going through a tough time." "Will you tell him that I'll try to stop by before I leave?" "Will do." "Hey, either of you boys married yet?" "Not me, I still got wild oats to sow," "I don't know what Jakes problem is." "He hasn't had a long-term relationship with anyone but you." "I think you're the only girl he's ever liked." "Steve!" "Steve, it's Jake Hampton, you around?" "I got something for you." "Hey Steve." "Steve?" "Steve?" "It's Jake Hampton, you home?" "Raargh!" "Hey Ethan, what's up with the lights?" "Hey!" "Ethan!" "Ethan?" "Ethan?" "Ethan?" "Oh no, no, no, no, Ethan?" "Ethan?" "What the?" "Sheriff, come in." "Sheriff, are you there?" "Bill, do you copy?" "What's up honey bunny?" "I just got a call from Jake Hampton, his brother's been killed." "What?" "Ethan?" "How?" "Jake says that Ethan was killed by Earl's statue." "Very funny, let me guess the Hampton boys are playing a practical joke?" "Those boys and pranks." "It's not a prank, Bill." "Jake swears that he saw it with his own eyes and he gave the same description that Earl did." "Alright, on my way." "I hate this place." "You're still up?" "It's not my fault, the internet here is the worst." "I finally just got my emails open now." "Okay, come on, shut it down now sweetie." "You can read them in the morning." "I want to finish writing back to Daddy first." "Okay." "10 more minutes then it's lights out, deal?" "Why can't you and Daddy just make up?" "Because we just can't." "Not this time." "10 more minutes, okay?" "Yeah." "Night Claire." "Good night Mom." "Oh come on." "Oh my God." "Mom!" "Are you okay?" "Are we having an earthquake?" "Ahhhhhhhh!" "Auntie Beth!" "Ahhhhhhhh!" "What's going on, Jake?" "My brothers dead." "I'm so sorry." "Woah, Ethan." "Jenny come in." "Jenny come in." "Go ahead Sheriff." "Wake the coroner and tell him to get his butt down to Jake's place pronto." "Is it Ethan?" "Yeah, I'm afraid so." "Oh my God, who would want to kill Ethan?" "I don't know, I don't think this is a homicide." "It looks like he got awfully sick from something." "Okay I'm calling the coroner right now." "Is she?" "How?" "What happened?" "I don't know." "Looks like some kind of allergic reaction to something." "Ahhhhhh!" "What was that thing?" "I don't know!" "The car won't start!" "Hurry Mom!" "Oh my God." "Oh my God, what was that Mom?" "I don't know, you okay?" "I want to go home now!" "We will baby, I want to go to the Sheriff's first." "Okay?" "Okay." "Where's my Golem?" "Crazy son of a bitch that thing " "Take it easy!" "Take it easy!" "What are you talking about?" "That thing!" "That thing that you built just killed my brother!" "That's crazy talk!" "Ethan's dead." "And it ain't pretty." "Is Ethan really dead?" "Yeah Earl." "You better stop that machine before it kills someone else." "It's not a machine, Jake, it's a statue and somebody stole it." "That's a load of crap Earl!" "Look Jake, I'm sorry, I'm truly sorry about Ethan." "You know I love him but I'm not a rocket scientist," "I couldn't build a machine," "I don't even have a high school diploma." "You're lying!" "I know you're lying because I know what I saw!" "You're seriously telling me that you saw my Golem walking around on its own two feet all by itself?" "Yes, I saw your thing walking around on its legs by itself." "It shook the freaking building." "And he ain't been drinking Earl, and it's a fact that something very strange killed Ethan." "But where did it go?" "I don't know where it went Earl, maybe it went back to the scrap yard." "Alright fellas, settle down." "Here's the coroner." "We'll get to the bottom of this." "I haven't seen anything like this." "Every artery in his body is distended." "Distended, what does that mean, distended?" "It's when an internal pressure causes an artery to swell." "Caused by what?" "It would have to be some kind of an extreme bacterial infection." "Like that ecoli?" "Yeah, I need to do blood work." "You're saying poor Ethan died from eating bad meat?" "Are you kidding me?" "Are you trying to blame Ethan's death on a bad hamburger?" "I saw what killed him, I saw it with my own two eyes, it wasn't a piece of meat." "Jake believes that his brother was killed by some kind of machine." "I see no external injuries or bruises, this man died of internal causes." "Only a severe bacterial infection could have done this." "This is ridiculous." "Jake, where you going?" "I need to do an autopsy right away." "If this man died of ecoli we need to trace the source." "Alright then do it." "Hello?" "Lets go check the bar, come on." "Oh no no." "Jake." "What do you think you're doing Jake?" "What does it look like I'm doing?" "You think you're going to hunt down some machine you think you saw?" "I'm not crazy Bill, I know what I saw." "Alright then." "Do me a favour and leave that rifle behind." "I have a permit." "I'm not breaking any laws." "But I just hate to see you doing something you might regret." "Are you done?" "♪" "Alright, that's it, last call." "It's closing time." "It ain't closing time." "Look around you Harry, you see what I see?" "A freaking empty bar that's what." "No offense but you're not exactly the biggest spender in town." "I remember when your Pa used to pack them in here every night no matter what day of the week it was." "Yes well, when times are hard small towns like ours that often get shafted." "Does anyone know where the Sheriff is?" "She can't come in here, Amanda." "I need to use your phone." "Okay, but she can't be in here." "If the Sheriff comes by he'll shut me down for having a minor." "No, she's staying in here, it's not safe out there." "What are you talking about?" "Something just killed my Aunt." "What?" "What do you mean something?" "I don't know, it was like a thing." "It looked like scrap metal, it was a machine." "Me thinks the lady has been in Hollywood just a little too long." "I'm serious Tony!" "What's wrong with the phone?" "I don't know, what?" "It was working earlier." "The wire must be down or something." "That thing did it, tore down the phone lines." "It's not funny, my Aunt's dead." "Was this thing like 18 feet tall, was it built out of old car parts?" "Yeah." "Yes." "Have you seen it?" "Yeah." "It's not a machine though, it's a statue." "My grandfather built it." "The thing wasn't a statue it moved, it chased us." "It was stolen tonight, okay, so someone must be using it to try to scare you guys." "Well whatever it is it just killed my Aunt." "Hello?" "Hey, anybody here?" "You okay?" "Yeah." "I'll be right back." "It's okay, I'm just going to look out the window and see if the Sheriff's back." "Don't get too close." "It's okay sweetie." "Hey, I brought you some water." "Thank you." "Listen, I'm sorry about your Aunt." "Thank you." "He's here." "Come on hon." "The Sheriff's back." "Hey Max, so your grandfather's in the monster making business now is he?" "It's not a monster Tony, it's a statue, a Golem." "A what?" "Sheriff!" "Sheriff!" "Good evening Amanda." "My Aunt's been killed." "When?" "Just an hour ago." "Where?" "At her house." "What happened?" "Something infected her, some kind of machine." "A huge robot!" "What did it look like?" "Piece of junk!" "Place needs a bit of fixing Tony." "Oh what now?" "Maybe it's the monster." "Hey, you be nice okay." "It's not a monster, it's a Golem." "Isn't that right Max?" "Yeah right, you're very funny." "What the heck?" "Oh my God." "It's here." "What is?" "The monster!" "Where is it now?" "You need a bigger gun!" "Ahhhhhh!" "Ahhhhh!" "Did you hear that?" "It sounded like shooting." "Holy!" "Harry!" "Ahhhhhhh!" "Claire!" "Claire!" "Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!" "Where's Max?" "Did he make it in?" "Earl, what is going on?" "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" "Run Amanda, run!" "Amanda!" "Amanda, you alright?" "Yeah." "Okay." "Come on." "Watch out!" "Ahhhhhhhhh!" "Oh God, come on lets get out of here." "Go go!" "Holy crap!" "What was that thing?" "A killer robot?" "How do we stop that thing Earl?" "What in Gods name did you create Earl?" "You answer me!" "Okay?" "How do we kill that thing?" "I don't know, it's just a statue." "A statue!" "A statue?" "!" "It killed my brother, that statue killed the Sheriff." "I'm so sorry!" "Where's my daughter?" "Amanda she's not here." "I have to find her." "She didn't come back." "Move, let me out Tony." "Are you nuts, you saw what those things did to the Sheriff." "That's right and my daughter is out there!" "I have to find her!" "Those things will kill you!" "A little help please!" "Don't let it touch you!" "Move!" "Woah woah it's okay," "I saw Claire go with Max." "She's in good hands, trust me." "At least they're not in here with us, right?" "I mean they probably went to go get help, right Jake?" "Hey!" "Hey!" "Would you slow down!" "We have to get help!" "I know, I know, the next town is like 20 miles away." "I told you it was a machine!" "It's not a machine." "Then what is it?" "It's a Golem." "What's a Golem?" "It's supposed to be for protection." "So your grandfather is some kind of a wizard then?" "No, he's not a wizard." "He runs a junk yard." "Alright, he built a sculpture of a Golem for the town centennial," "I just I have no idea how it's able to move around like that." "Well obviously whatever he made is a machine." "It's impossible, okay," "I helped him build the thing." "There's no motors in it, there's no computers, it's just scrap metal, it's all just junk." "This can't be happening." "What are those things?" "What do they want?" "The phones are dead." "I have to find Claire." "No way, it's too dangerous out there." "Well I can't just sit here." "Look, we got to figure out what it is that we're up against, okay?" "Oh my God." "Holy crap what do we do?" "What we do with any big bug." "No, don't touch it." "Why not?" "Hey back up, back up." "It's got some kind of poisonous mold on it, that's what just killed the Sheriff." "We've got to get rid of that thing, man." "Are you sure that it's a mold and not some kind of bacteria?" "Bacteria are microscopic, can't be seen with the naked eye." "Woah!" "Who cares what it is guys, that thing just killed the Sheriff we've got to get rid of it!" "Because the coroner said Ethan died from an extreme form of bacteria and he died the exact same way the Sheriff just did." "I guess a rare non-microscopic species of bacteria found in ocean sediment but never on land." "Woah!" "Holy crap it's after me!" "Somebody do something!" "Quick!" "Quick!" "Do something!" "Nice one Jake!" "You killed it, man!" "Way to go!" "Well if it's that easy to kill we should get our asses outside and chomp up the rest of it before it gets away." "It's not dead." "Oh man." "We are so screwed." "Sheriff, do you copy?" "Can you hear me?" "Can you hear me?" "I'm getting some kind of weird squealing on my radio." "Hey!" "Help!" "Help!" "What's going on!" "Look Jen, something terrible is happening in town right now." "You need to call the army or something." "What are you guys talking about?" "It's my grandfather's sculpture." "You found it." "No, it's alive." "Alive?" "Well, maybe, maybe, I don't know, but it is attacking the town right now." "Get in the back." "You're going to call for help?" "Not until I see what the heck it is you kids are talking about." "We're telling the truth because you've got to call the army or something right now." "Get in the back!" "If this is some kind of deadly bacteria we need to start figuring a way to exterminate it." "You're the biology teacher." "It does look like some kind of bacterial cell structure." "Come on guys, we don't have time for Science class." "Hey Tony, you want to figure this out or not?" "Well we should be figuring a way out of here before that stuff spreads all over the place and kills us." "I don't think it can spread in here." "It seems to only thrive on metal." "Lo, it's not spreading to the wooden handle." "Or the floor." "Yeah you're right." "It's staying on the axe head." "The question is, if this is some new species of bacteria, where did it come from?" "The satellite." "What satellite?" "Ethan and I found a crashed satellite this morning and then we sold it to Earl and you put some of the satellite pieces on your statue." "No, I didn't." "Yeah, you did." "I recognize some of the Russian writing on it." "No, I didn't." "Jake, those pieces they must have put themselves on just like they're moving around outside by themselves right now." "Did you say Russian?" "Those commie sons of bitches!" "It's a biological attack!" "Could that be what this is, some kind of biological weapon?" "I don't think so I mean it's not a toxin or anthrax." "It's not airborne or we'd all be dead." "I've never seen bacteria strong enough to propel its host." "Host?" "You mean it's some sort of parasite?" "Well, it's using the metal surface to colonize." "Which means the metal is providing it with basic nutritional needs." "Ear's statue gave it a home." "That's great." "Everybody else in town is having their homes foreclosed and you give this thing a place to live." "Tony, it's not his fault." "Oh God I hope Claire's okay." "Hey, I'm sure that she and Max are long gone by now, okay?" "I don't see anyone." "Do you think that thing's gone?" "I don't know, I don't see it anywhere." "I want to look for my Mom!" "Where did all this happen, Max?" "It was down the street, by the Sheriff's office." "Hey, woah, woah, woah, what are you doing?" "It's okay, I'm not going to touch it." "Wow, why is it doing that?" "It's attracted to something in our bodies." "You mean it's one of them flesh eating bacteria?" "No." "Given how its victims veins enlarge it might be that it's extracting something from our blood." "Oh that's great." "It's vampire bacteria." "Next thing you know we'll need silver bullets to stop this thing." "What's it extracting?" "Well, human blood is loaded with metals, iron, copper, zinc." "So given that this bacteria thrives on metal surfaces it's probably consuming the metal in our blood." "So then it is alien." "If it came from the satellite." "What's this alien invader want?" "Probably what all bacteria want;" "to reproduce, and feed." "Hey guys, it's Deputy Jenny." "We should escape now while we can." "No way, not with those things out there swimming around like sharks." "They don't seem to be moving right now." "They will, once they sense blood." "Hey, look at that car, it died, just like mine." "Mine too." "That's weird." "The car went dead." "It means that things still here." "Is that the bacteria that's doing that?" "It's nerve impulses are giving off an electromagnetic field." "Damn!" "Talk about a super bug." "As long as she stays in the car and can radio for help she'll be fine." "Okay, come on." "I'm telling you Jenny, you need to call the army or something right now." "How am I going to do that, Max, everything's dead." "Oh no." "You shouldn't go out there!" "Oh no." "Jenny!" "Jenny no!" "Get back in the car!" "Jenny!" "Jenny, get back in the car!" "Get back in the car!" "No!" "Get back in the car!" "My mom's in the bar!" "No Jenny!" "Jenny!" "Lets go." "How do we get out of here?" "There's no door handles." "Mom!" "Mom!" "No!" "Get back in the car!" "Get in the car!" "Jenny!" "They can't see us." "They're trying to warn Jenny." "About what?" "Those pieces from the statue." "Jenny!" "Behind you!" "It's going for her." "Deputy!" "Get back in the car!" "No, get back in the car!" "What are you doing?" "No!" "Jenny!" "Deputy!" "No!" "Oh my God!" "This is crazy!" "I don't understand what's happening right now." "Whatever it is, we need to get out of here." "Mom!" "Oh my God, look." "Is that thing putting itself back together?" "It sure looks that way." "Oh man, this just gets better and better." "I don't understand!" "How can a statue put itself together?" "We should have chopped up the son of a bitch when we had the chance." "No doubt." "That thing is coming together!" "I want out of the car, get me out of the car!" "Mom!" "Get me out!" "No!" "Someone's in the cruiser." "It's Max, he's trapped in the back seat!" "And Claire's there too." "We need to get them out." "How are we going to do that?" "That thing is putting itself together right in front of the car." "I've got to get to my truck." "Wait, wait, wait." "Out there right now?" "I was going to blow that thing up earlier okay?" "So I loaded a propane tank and a rifle in my truck." "Now, are you sure that that thing is attracted to blood?" "As much as sharks." "What are you thinking?" "We cover the propane tank in blood, we use it as bait." "When that thing goes for it we shoot the tank, blows the whole thing to Kingdom Come." "Sounds good." "It's good." "Yeah." "Okay." "Where are you going?" "To get my daughter." "Okay but you stay behind me, we go to the drivers side so we don't wet that things appetite, okay?" "Okay." "You ready?" "Yeah." "Holy crap!" "It's alive!" "I wouldn't get too close if I were you!" "Well, you're not me, are you?" "Aaah!" "Aaah!" "This is nuts!" "Holy crap!" "Mom!" "Don't get out!" "Get back in the car!" "Stay in the car!" "We're going to blow it up!" "Okay." "Sweet." "What's it doing?" "Just sitting there." "You got any spray cleaner?" "Spray cleaner?" "Yeah, something that kills germs!" "Look out!" "Ahhhhhhhhh!" "Ahhhhhh!" "Dear God in heaven!" "Ahhhhhh!" "Wait." "That's not a vein." "Okay you do it." "Yeah, okay, alright." "No, no, no, I mean you cut me." "No, it's better I do this, you have to shoot the tank." "This is a nightmare." "What are you doing with the soap?" "I'm going to find a way to kill this thing before anyone else does." "Do you think soap is strong enough to kill something as dangerous as this?" "It says antibacterial." "You okay?" "Yeah." "You really never had another girlfriend after me?" "Nothing serious, no." "You're crazy." "Half the girls in town want you." "Peggy." "Soap didn't do crap." "Maybe not but it's something." "Trust me, we've just got to think." "What else kills bacteria?" "This spray cleaner says it kills germs." "It's coming!" "Ahhhhhh!" "Hey!" "Smell this you hunk of junk!" "Come on!" "Come on, over here!" "Max, lets get out of here!" "Come on!" "Hey!" "It's coming!" "It's coming back!" "Oh my God!" "Ahhhhh!" "Don't touch it!" "Ahhhhhh!" "Hey!" "Ahhhhhh!" "Come on!" "Look what I got!" "Hey!" "Hey!" "Ahhhhh!" "Suck on this!" "She's got more balls than both of us put together." "Look what I got." "That's it." "Come on." "That's it." "Come on." "Come on!" "Get in the bar." "Am I okay?" "Yeah, you're fine." "Are you sure?" "Yeah." "Why didn't it kill me?" "I touched it." "Agh!" "Son of a bitch!" "Oh no!" "Shoot the tank!" "I can't, it's too far away, I won't do anything." "Run mom!" "We've got to get out of here, we've got to get inside." "We'll figure it out." "Claire, stay in the car!" "We'll be right back, baby!" "Oh God." "Oh no." "What happened to Tony?" "What do you think?" "I've got to help them." "What are you going to do?" "I'm going to get the tank." "What are you doing?" "I'm going to chop that son of a bitch to pieces." "Max, be careful!" "Are you crazy?" "That's suicide!" "That thing is going to bust in the door any second." "Bullets are bouncining off it o unless you got a better idea." "Hey!" "Hey!" "You want a taste of this!" "Damn it!" "Well we'd better do something!" "Hey!" "You want a taste of this!" "Jake!" "Jake!" "Jake, get ready!" "Jake!" "Jake!" "It's Max." "Alright, everybody stay here." "Open the door." "Jake!" "Jake, get ready!" "Drop the tank!" "Get outta there!" "Run Max!" "Max, watch out!" "Shoot it!" "Move now, get out!" "Max!" "Max!" "Ahhhhh!" "Ahhhhh!" "I'll be damned." "Help!" "Amanda, look!" "What?" "The chink in the armour!" "Help!" "Help!" "Earl!" "Earl!" "Max!" "Get up!" "Move!" "Help!" "Help!" "Come on!" "Are you okay, Max?" "Max!" "It don't like booze." "Earl, you alright?" "Let's get you up." "Lets get out of here." "Get up, get up!" "Grab some bottles!" "What is that?" "What are you doing?" "It doesn't like alcohol." "Have a drink you alien son of a bitch." "Baby." "Are you okay?" "Yeah, but I touched it." "Why didn't it kill me?" "The metal was infected with a bacteria that feeds on blood iron." "Thank God you're anemic." "I'd say we got every single one of them small fry alien bastards." "What are we going to do with all this scrap metal?" "Well I can tell you what we're not going to do with it." "Don't worry, I'm retiring from the Golum business." "This stuffs all going in the compacter just to be sure." "Yeah, well we're going to take this with us, just to be sure." "I'll go get the loader." "Yes!" "Yes!" "I know it's illegal to call in a false report." "This is not a hoax." "What are you looking for Earl?" "My baby, she's in here someplace." "Baby?" "No, no, no, the Sheriff and the deputy are dead, do you understand that?" "They're dead, there is no law enforcement in Redeemer right now." "Aha!" "Here she is!" "Look I just..." "All that for a bottle of liquor?" "It's no ordinary bottle of liquor, this is Special Reserve." "This is worth more than my damn truck." "I've been saving her for a special occasion." "Well surviving last night certainly qualifies." "I'll go find some glasses." "Okay, that's fine, you know where to find me okay?" "Yeah, you too." "Well, I just talked to the State Police." "Do they believe you?" "Not a word, they didn't believe the kids either." "The good news is they're on the way to arrest me." "What?" "What for?" "Calling in a hoax." "That's the good news." "At least they are coming, right?" "You okay?" "I will be." "We need to work on getting you a girlfriend." "I told you, I'm picky." "How picky?" "Very picky." "Well, nice to see something good came out of this horror show." "Good timing." "Oh thank you." "Thank you." "Oh man, you've got to be kidding me." "That bacteria really doesn't want to die." "I sure hope they appreciate fine liquor." "Well, we're going to have to douse the entire yard, just to be sure." "You got any more of that Special Reserve stashed away?" "Do bears crap in the woods?" " sync, corrected by elderman "