"THE CAIMAN" "As Mao says, "The world is yours, as it is ours, but ultimately, it is yours."" "We, marxist-leninists, we're in favor of a simple life." "Even Party leaders must live like workers." "And when scions of wealth come to see us, with their long hair and their fashionable clothes, we tell them, "If you want to work for the Party, you must give all your money to the Party." "Otherwise, we won't trust you."" "Our organization must build a truly revolutionary Party by destroying the revisionist clique of communists and unions that betrayed the Italian people to sell out to the bourgeoisie and the government." "This revolutionary couple, which is celebrating its union, will fight all economicist deviance and all intellectualism which advocates absurdities such as the struggle for work..." "Fabrizia!" "I'm not Fabrizia." "My name is Aidra." "Police!" "I'm trapped!" "Surround the building." "Stay where you are!" "CATARACTS" "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen." "We're about to find out how great little movies like this are born." "We'll learn it directly from the man who produced them." "Tonight's guest of honor:" "Bruno Bonomo!" " I want to leave you this script." " Afterwards." "No, I can't stay." " The Caiman." "I'll read it calmly." " Not too calmly, okay?" "Bonomo, the man who revived genre cinema in Italy long before Quentin Tarantino with his first movie:" "Killer Moccasins" "Pig Bootees, Maciste vs. Freud and the movie Bruno revisited with us tonight:" "Cataracts." "A movie that ruined him." "Bills, loss of a house, bankruptcy of a company..." "No, my production company is still..." "With all due respect, you haven't made a movie since." "Your director opened an optics shop." "But I, I believed in it." "I expected it to do very well." "It was a disaster!" "And I say that not to be cruel but to make up for the exile you subsequently suffered." "We've missed you these last ten years." "What have you been up to?" "I'm preparing a movie." "And you tell me just like that, without any warning?" "I'm pleased, but a little annoyed." "You played a trick on me!" "What movie are you making?" "A movie about Christopher Columbus's return from America." " Directed by?" " Franco Caspio" "This man is overwhelming us with emotions!" "Three great comebacks:" "25 years for Caspio, 10 for Bonomo, 5 centuries for Columbus!" "Here's the solution!" "No need to build a real one." "It's a model, made for my grandson." "Congratulations, he understands the essence of cinema." "We'll use this." "Fortunately, Columbus brought back only one ship, the..." "The Nina." "We'll put it in our pool." "You'll see the result!" "That's how we shot Sea of Fear." " You remember that movie?" " No." "But I'm not used to filming like that." " You're not used to filming, period." " Neither are you!" "Don't worry." "You'll have everything you need." "I was wondering what I should bring tonight." "It's early, but I wanted to get a head start." "How can anyone make a movie with this toy?" "We'll make the whole movie with it!" "I'll bring dessert." "We've got the production designer Fritz Simmons." "But he's alcoholic!" "He stopped drinking." "Collaborators..." "For the last year, it's been just you and me." "Thursday, I sign the contract with RAI and we'll talk again." "An assistant!" "You can at least give me an assistant." "After Thursday, you'll have an assistant, a production designer, a costume designer." "Yesterday, at the party for Dino Risi's 90th birthday" "Aurelio de Laurentiis asked me to read the script." "He's been hearing about it for a long time and he's interested." "Dino Risi's birthday party?" "He doesn't invite me anymore." " Look what daddy found!" " No, it's not flat." "It's like this one, size 12, but it's not the right one." "We've been looking for this piece for an hour and a half." "Roberto's father said you played well Saturday." "You never tell me anything!" "Yes, but you must help me find the piece." "Otherwise, I won't finish the ship." "Size 12, yellow, flat." "How did it go last night?" "Well." "They showed Lady Cop in High Heels." " And Cataracts too?" " Of course." " And Aidra was there?" " No, she can't show herself." "She's wanted by the police all over the world." "Really?" "Why?" " Tonight's story..." " Aidra's in it?" "Yes, but I can't remember where we left off." "She had become a great chef and she worked in a restaurant." " What was it named?" " "Love Slave"" "In the restaurant kitchen, Aidra is almost unrecognizable." "No one knows her true identity." "She has changed her life and everyone loves her." "Everyone, except for the critic of a restaurant guide who always badmouths her cooking." "But one day, this mean critic came back to the restaurant for a new article." "She had long been waiting for him." ""Sicilian stuffed cutlets, Puerto-Rican risotto," ""Rice ball Plaisance!" ""Tripes Zurich," ""stew with apples," ""Boiled calf feet..."" "At one point the first course arrives." "A fork plunges into the rice." "The critic barely tastes it, then calls over the waiter." "Everything's fine." "He tasted it." "He left some of it..." "He left all of it." "How can a restaurant of this class improvise a Puerto-Rican risotto with a julienne of peppers?" "Spanish olives must be used!" "You and your palates... you must not set foot in this place again!" "Never again!" "Bananas Copacabana, tomatoes stuffed with scrambled eggs, chicken Sparafucile!" "I was waiting for you." "I'm unsure about this recipe." "They look alive..." "They are alive." "You're the dead one." "No!" "Yes..." "Forgive me!" "I've suffered from sinusitis for fifteen years." "I can't taste anything I eat!" "Those films were considered fascist." "Can you believe it?" " We were fascist." " No way!" "Don't try to steal their trade from those who know how to do it." "You were the resistance against the tyranny of auteur cinema, you were antibodies." "It was just two ways to do the same work." "Those people pay very well." "They take everything, even the trailers." "You have them?" "Only Pig Bootees is missing." "It was stolen in Viterbo." "I'll find it at the Ministry." " Young people want to see your films." " But no one's asking me for them." "We do a box set," "I restore the negatives," "I add some appetizing extras, an interview with Paola..." "Forget it!" "She doesn't want to hear anything about movies." " You have the censored cuts?" " I've never had problems with censors." "Sure you did: 500 frames of Suzy the Misogynist!" " Fifteen seconds!" " You really pushed the limits, eh?" "All I have are my films and these studios." " A piece of movie history." " They only shoot home shopping here." "But they haven't paid in 6 months." "Excuse me a moment." "Marisa, what's going on?" " He's leaving." " Where is he going?" "Wait!" " Where are you going?" " Let me go." "It's all set." "We have an appointment with RAI!" "De Laurentiis read the script?" "He did, and he loved it." "But since he bought that Naples team, he only thinks about football." "Peppe also thinks that..." " Tell him!" " Together, you can do something fresh." "You, shut up!" "I remember what you wrote about me." ""The violent use of quick zooms" ""brings to mind amateur films."" " What was the matter with you?" " That was 30 years ago." " Me, I remember!" " What a memory..." "Come on, come back." " Give me the box." " Just drop it." "Let go!" "No one wanted you anymore, no one trusted you!" "Give it to me!" "What are you going to do with it?" "You'll break it!" "I don't want to see you again." "I don't want to see you again." "Come back here right now!" "Franco!" "Andrea, pay attention." "Watch the match." "Referee!" "I'm making substitutions." "Emanuele and Gianluca," "Giuseppe and Nicolas." "Don't move." "Coach!" "I know Andrea isn't very good, but he's been making progress." "Yes, but it's not important." "Even Roberto's father said he played well." "Don't worry." "I'll put him in." "Are you putting him in attack or in defense?" "He seems stronger in defense to me..." "Dad, please!" "Don't worry." "Sorry, I don't want to interfere with your technical choices..." "But did you see number 16?" "Are you sure he was born in '96?" "He looks older." "They're all the same age." "OK, I'm sitting down and watching." "I'm counting on you!" "Aidra doesn't know what to do." "She hasn't breathed in seven minutes." "Four men are after her, knives between their teeth." "Suddenly, Aidra has an idea." "What idea came to her?" "I'm disturbing their sleep, me?" "But Andrea forced me to watch Men in Black 1 and 2, The Matrix," "National Treasure, The Incredible Hulk." "Stories full of dead people and worms..." "The fact is, you don't want them to see you in Cataracts." "Meanwhile I'd really like them to know that their parents did something together." "The children understand that something is off." "Let's stop with this myth that children understand everything." "I told them I don't sleep here because I'm shooting at night and they believed it." "We're in the process of separating." "We have to talk to them about it." "It's not a real separation." "We said we wanted time to think." "We might be together again." "It feels like things have been better." "Why do you say they understand?" "Did they say something?" "No." "Listen, Bruno..." "Andrea sobs uncontrollably almost every night because he's lost a small piece from a toy." "He says it's the thing he holds dearest." "So he cries that it must absolutely be found." "We turn on the lights," "Giacomo wakes up and also starts crying." "Sometimes I cry too." "And we don't fall back to sleep for hours." "I have to drop off because I'm expecting something." "Thousands of bank notes scatter all around him." "Billions of liras from the 70s." "Where does this money come from?" "Billions, billions and billions of liras." "All this money fallen from the sky." "Where does it come from?" "All this money..." "Where does it come from?" "Sorry to call at this hour." "May I speak to Teresa Mantero?" "It's Bruno Bonomo." "I have here a script, The Caiman." "Your phone number is on it..." "Ah, you're the girl from the other night, with the baby?" "Yes, I remember." "And why give this script to me?" "Ah, OK, I was last on the list." "Of course I read it." "Interesting." "But I don't want to talk about it over the telephone." "We could make an appointment..." "We'll speak again, then." "Good night, Teresa." "Good morning." " How are you?" " Fine." "What's new?" "What do we do about today's appointment with RAI for The Return of Christopher Columbus?" "We'll see." " Did Franco Caspio call?" " No." "The bank called." "We have an overdraft of 40,000 euros." "They suggest an allocation plan." "What's that?" "Hold all my calls." "I have to read this script." "Just put my wife through if she calls." "Scene 6, exterior, day." "We're in Milan in the early 70s." "Groundbreaking day at a construction site." "I want to build a neighborhood that leads towards optimism." "A pessimist never accomplishes anything good in life." "One, two, three!" "I want to build a city where you can find everything:" "The clinic where you're born, school, work, cable TV for the housewives." "This site costs 500 millions a day." "May we know who gave them to you?" "All this money, where does it really come from?" "It's a question I won't answer right now." "In fact, I'll never answer it!" "You were waiting for me?" "We wanted some information which, as executive director of Edilmilano..." "There's a misunderstanding." "I'm only a consultant, in charge of direction." "We've investigated the source of your money, which is managed by 22 secret funds." "I have no secrets." "And those funds don't belong to me." "No, they belong to figureheads, housewives, retirees, a poor stroke victim." "But we know it all belongs to you." "There's one thing we don't know:" "Where does this money come from?" "Don't disappoint me by asking that question, you too." "You're bright, too bright for your job." " Did Paola call?" " No." "And Franco Caspio neither?" "Two years I work for him and not even a call!" "If a friend calls, put him through." "You can even put strangers through." "I want to be disturbed!" "How long has it been since we've seen a helicopter in an Italian movie?" "It's an action movie!" "Suitcases full of money, rises to power..." "All this money, where does it come from?" "A powerful man who wants to build a whole city..." " What about Columbus?" " It's sad!" "He came back with a single caravel." "Period movies aren't box office anymore." "This is a contemporary movie." " Directed by Caspio?" " No!" "By a woman director, young and talented." "Transfer the money from the first phase of the contract from Columbus to Caiman." "Easy." "It's not that simple." "This movie is less expensive." "We'll all save money." "OK, but this is an entirely different film." " Plus this woman is a complete unknown." " I know her." "Read the script." " Enough." " Please, I want to work." "Stop!" "I've been trying to help you for a half hour." "You have to pitch in too." "What must Plop do?" "I didn't understand." "Plop is a bird that falls from the tree." "A man or an animal comes by and mistakes it for something." "What do they take it for?" "I get it:" "The bird looks like..." " I'm going." " Are you coming home late?" "You're beautiful!" "Mom is more beautiful than usual." "But why do you rehearse at night?" "The conductor is busy during the day." " In 10 minutes, you stop the movie." " That's all?" " It's a good movie." " Then watch it all." " We caved in quickly again." " He asked when you were coming home." "When I come home, you'll be asleep." " You'll wake me up?" " I will." " I have to ask you something." " It's late." " What can Plop be taken for?" " I had no idea." " What a pretty jacket." " It's new." "What are you singing in the concert?" "Handel cantatas and before, there's a baroque concerto." "Plop is afraid of the dark." "Maybe the answer is there." "It's not a riddle." "It's an exercise in imagining." "Ah, then we have to invent!" " Are you a little happy?" " I'm very happy." "I sent the script to a bunch of producers, but they didn't even call to say they didn't like it." "And now, straight to RAI!" "That's my job." "How did you present the project?" "You see this?" "The last Italian pirate movie was shot here." "Maybe the subject matter was too potent for them?" "The Last Words of Black Patch, ever heard of it?" " But you know my films?" " Just Cataracts." " And?" " It's not really my style, but..." " But it's funny!" " Sure, a few scenes..." "What did you tell the TV guys?" "To be honest, the way we made movies..." "What did you tell them?" "That's a saloon built by a great production designer." "I'll introduce you to him." "You can use him for the film." "We shot two movies at the same time:" "Bloody Nights for Sheriff Clark and Revenge of the Wild Witches." "One by day and the other at night." "What I told them about The Caiman?" "I saw right away that they were interested." "Finally a solid, ambitious film." "We have to see what they say about the script." "I explained the story to them, but I got lost towards the end." " Yes, for the ending we'll have to..." " No, it's my fault." "As I was talking, I lost the thread." "Because I have to admit that I didn't read it all." " What?" " I read it like this..." "Diagonal reading." "I skimmed it." "These days I can't manage to concentrate." "I have a lot of problems, some personal..." " What?" " I'm even taking Omega 3." "I didn't read the script." "Don't worry, everything will be fine." "How could you pitch it to TV without reading it?" "What are we going to tell them?" "Don't worry." "I trust my instincts." "I can feel it." "The film is there." "It's full of action and atmosphere." "All set, here we go!" "I just got a little bit stuck on the part about the smugglers..." "It's complicated." "I didn't get it at all." "Let's take it from the top." "Do you remember Cesari?" "Cesari, the IRS agent who discovered the Caiman's slush funds, is now his right-hand man." "In the new neighborhood which the Caiman has just built, a dark sedan arrives." "Cesari fills a safe with billions in government bonds and takes them to a bank in the Republic of San Marino, where they're converted into cash." "The cash is brought back to Milan and kept in a secret apartment." "That's where the smugglers come in." "They are specialists in money transfers out of the country." "They each take 500 million liras, cross the border and deposit the money in numbered Swiss bank accounts." "What was the purpose of the money in the Swiss accounts?" "The prosecution claims the accused used it for the illicit financing of political parties, for the corruption of judges in order to secure favorable verdicts and for the evasion of taxes." "After that scene, it's clear that the Caiman is based on Berlusconi." "How didn't I think of it?" "The helicopters, the stadium, the IRS..." "I completely failed to get it!" "Listen to the man." " What?" " Look what you did." "I already hated left-wing political films 30 years ago!" "What did you picture?" "Return of Cataracts?" "It took me ten years to get RAI to consider working with me!" " We have to do the report!" " Report on what?" " The accident report." " What?" "The accident report!" "Give me this thing..." "The banks won't give out a penny." "They'll repossess the studios..." "I told them it was an action movie, and now I tell them we want to make a movie about Berlusconi." " I even voted for him!" " You say it just like that?" "Go, clear out!" "A man who suddenly becomes wealthy, who owns three TV channels, who becomes president of the Council to avoid debts and lawsuits." "This isn't a movie." "This is what we already know!" "And you, what does this have to do with you?" "It's the movie I want to make, a film I believe in." "It's a movie the public is waiting for." "The public is waiting for this movie?" "It's a rather delicate subject for a first film." "Start with a story that's closer to you." "It's obvious this movie doesn't spring from a sense of urgency." "I do feel a sense of urgency about making this film." "Plus, it's too easy to make an ideological film." "Ideological?" "There must be a misunderstanding." "Let's not fixate on the Berlusconi character." "It's an obsession!" " Also in the movie, there isn't all of..." " All of..." "We don't talk about the relationship between Berlusconi, Dell'Utri and the mafia." "I didn't follow." "How do you mean?" "That's in the script?" "No?" "So why talk about it!" "The Caiman is a broader film, about power, about Italy." "And the Italy of the last 30 years is Berlusconi." "Ah, young people!" "Stuck in their positions." "Perhaps you'd like to see a second draft of the script?" "I'll get her some help from a professional screenwriter." "You could have your choice..." "Sorry, but we're not interested." "I really want to make this movie." "It's absurd that no one in Italy has made a movie about Berlusconi." "In the US, the president is the subject of political films, comedies thrillers, love stories." "Here, they're all afraid." "Money is just an excuse." "Money matters, and how!" "I'd like a tub to go." "For the kids." " Do you live far?" " Ten, fifteen minutes." "Then no." "The ice cream can only stay for 5 minutes in the container." "Otherwise, it's ruined." "Then I'll take the tub get in the car and gun it." "If I get in an accident, it means I won't make it in time." "When you take it out of the freezer, you have to eat it all." "Otherwise..." "Otherwise the consistency changes." "I know!" " Because our ice cream..." " Is different!" "I know it's different, so stop it already!" "What's the matter with everyone today?" "You're killing me!" "How are you, Giacomo?" "I was reading Mickey." "Do you know where daddy is?" " In Bologna." " No, In La..." "In Laponia." "A country full of lakes and forests where the sun always shines." " What does that mean?" " That night never falls." " You never sleep?" " I do, with a Zorro-style mask." "Good night." "Give mom a kiss." "Give her a kiss, OK?" "So, you'd prefer state-run television?" "With two identical channels, both gray... with programming that ends at eleven p.m." "Fully dressed dancers, is that what you want?" "They tried to stop us, to bar us, but we blocked them." "And I didn't do it for myself, but for you, because you've been waiting for this for years." "So, let's begin!" "You're obsessed with me." "I'm always on your mind." " You think of nothing else." " I like writing bad things about you." "And I'll continue, even if you buy my newspaper." "I'm a liberal editor." "You can write what you want." "But you're wrong:" "People like me." "I've answered a need." "These letters." "I get thousands a day." "Only from women." "They say that since I gave them TV even in the morning, their life has changed." "With their investigation into corruption, the courts have wiped out an entire political class." "You need to take a stand against the takeover by the judges." "They want to change the country's history, and that's not right." "If elections were held today, the left would have a crushing majority." "This country cannot afford this." "This country or this company?" "Legislative elections will be held next year and our corporation wants to take direct action." "Everyone must pitch in." "Our channels, our stars, our papers." "The moderates have mediocre personalities, without any charisma." "The only solution is to create a political force, which I will direct." "You don't care about the moderates." "You're doing this because you are 5 billions in debt and the judges are on the trail of your foreign accounts." "You want to enter politics, because otherwise you'll go to jail." "Italy is the country I love." "Here, I have my roots, my hopes, my horizons." "Here, I learned from my father and from life my job as an entrepreneur." "Here, I also learned a passion for freedom." "I chose to play the game and enter the public arena because I don't want to live in an antiliberal country, governed by immature forces and by men who are tied to a politically and economically disastrous past." "So what do we do?" " The situation isn't good." " I'm here to reassure you." "Look, I leave you messages at the office and you don't call back." "You're never home." " I'm getting a film ready." " You've been telling me that for ten years." "The loan guarantee for the studios has expired." "We've helped you, but you don't pay us back." "They want to sell your studios and throw you out." "I need very little time." "The film is taking off." "The movie about Columbus?" "No, another movie." "A strong one." "I reread it last night, in one sitting." "In three months, we'll be rolling again." "We'll solve all our problems." "I don't know what to say." "It's no longer up to me." "This looks fine to me." "There was one mistake, and we corrected it." " Is it ready?" " Not yet." "OK, I'm going back." "When you come in, we'll tell them." "No, you start and then I'll come." "I start and then we'll explain the whole situation to them calmly and quietly." "We'll start talking and you'll see how the words come all by themselves." "They need to know we're separating but we continue to love each other and to love them." "Here I go." "That's good, sweetie." "No mistakes." "The teacher will like it too." "What if she finds a mistake and she yells at me?" "Everything's perfect." "No, I want to check again." "Want to bet I know more swear words than you?" "I don't doubt it!" "I'll tell them to you:" "Go f..." "Children, dad has to tell you something important." "Mom and I..." "I'll be right back." "I can't do it." "What if we postpone?" " Andrea is so upset..." " Homework always stresses him out." "OK, we'll eat first." "Then we'll see." "Come here." "Put on your pajamas." "It's time for bed." "Who's staying with us?" "We want daddy to tell us a story." "OK, I'll stay." "Tonight we're both staying." "Mom and dad have to tell you something very important." "Mom is so beautiful." "Let's kiss her!" "Stop!" "Are you crazy?" "Please!" "Enough." "Off to bed!" "Thanks everyone." "I was saying..." " We have to tell you something important, right?" "Starting tomorrow, daddy will live in another house, his own house." " So he won't be coming at night." " Well, not like before..." "Why are you going to live somewhere else?" "That way, mommy and I won't fight as much." "If we fight less, we love each other more." "And if the two of us love each other more, we're all happier." " We won't sleep together anymore?" " Idiot, you didn't get it!" "No, we won't sleep together anymore." "But you'll have two houses, two bedrooms, more friends..." "And vacations, will we spend them together?" "We'll think about vacations later." "I drew up the project plan, the estimate..." "I counted 8 weeks, but I'm not sure that's right." "There are plenty of blanks in the estimate too, but I need to know the basics." "You must tell me when we start, so I can start calling people." ""The neo-communists want power without free elections, an unhealthy habit which is part of their DNA."" "It's important to make this film!" "Let's organize a public offering." " I'll work for free." " That's not necessary." "I always pay my people." "Not a lot, but..." " What were you saying?" " If you had seen the estimate." " How much money do we have for sure?" " I'm waiting on some answers." " Do we set the costumes aside?" " No." " And who'll play the lead?" " You should ask Teresa." " We've decided to do that." " Fritz, my friend!" "Teresa wants to reconstruct a piece of... of Parliament." "We need to call the staff, order... materials." "So, what do we do?" " What do we do?" " You have to tell us." "What do we do?" "We begin." "She is free!" "No one can stop her." "She has decided... to stop loving me." " I want to give you the lead." " Thank you." "I caress a shadow." "Sorry I'm not turning it down." "I love this song too much." "Thanks, but a movie about Berlusconi?" "Now, really." " We already know everything about him." " With his TV channels?" "Those who want to know, know." "Those who don't want to understand..." "You can't educate any more." "People know everything!" "So we do nothing and he wins again?" "He's already won!" "For twenty, thirty years, his TV channels have turned our heads." "Plus I'm not convinced by the script." " You haven't read it!" " OK, but just the same!" "I already know what's in it." "It's got what the leftist audience wants to be told." "Berlusconi messing up his facelift, but succeeding with his hair transplant." "Everyone is laughing." "That's not at all my movie!" "I know, but everyone's laughing." "There's nothing to laugh about." "Plus, I have another project..." "We made a mistake, Bruno." "Shall we get back to work?" "She's offended." "She's got a temper  she's stubborn." " She's talented!" "And a little unlikable." "That's why I like her." "But I'm currently writing a comedy I'm fond of, a comedy I like very much." "You think now is a good time to make a comedy?" "It's always a good time to make a comedy!" "They're leaving..." "Mr. Schultz." "In Italy, there's a producer who's preparing a film on the Nazi concentration camps." "I'll recommend you for a role of Kapo!" "She also voted for him." "You're perfect." "In addition to giving the floor to Mr. Schultz, you should ask Mr. Berlusconi to withdraw his statement in the name of the values we all share as Europeans." "What I said, I said in irony!" "If you're not capable of appreciating irony," "I'm sorry." "But I won't withdraw what I said in irony." "He has a very personal conception of irony." "Outside of the country, everyone is laughing at us." "It's not just the conflict of interest." "Go ahead." "What am I going to do?" "Of course I'm at work." "But you said you were going." "I see..." "Don't worry, I'll take care of it." "Problems?" "I have to go up pick up my daughter." "There was a misunderstanding." "Your wires got crossed." "It happens." "Foreigners can't manage to understand how a guy like him managed to paralyze Italy with his personal problems for twelve years." "That's just how it is." "See you tomorrow." "In Italy, newspapers, but especially TV channels belonging to my corporation and to my family, are among our harshest critics." "Why?" "Apparently, you don't have the Italian sun, you haven't visited and you have never turned on, never turned on, never turned on... an Italian television." "If this is the type of democracy that you plan to use to silence the president of the European Council," "I can tell you that you should come as tourists to Italy, but that here, you look like tourists of democracy." "While you're reading, you might feel like adding some things." "There's a way to build this character together, to make it closer to yourself, with some ideas..." "You hadn't thought of me?" " Bruno, there was another actor?" " She never thought of anyone else." "If there was someone, I won't be offended." "No, no one in particular." "But maybe you can make him more human." "I like that idea." "I didn't want to talk about the Caiman's private life, but about his public dimension." "From the creation of Milan 2 to the presidency of the Council." "So it's really Berlusconi, not just inspired by!" "In the broad outline..." "No, but Berlusconi is an important figure of our era." "Whether we like it or not, he might be the most important." "It's a film about Italy..." "I like the idea." "It's a challenging role for an actor." "When Gian Maria..." "Volontè played Aldo Moro he did something magnificent." "And that other character..." "the one who dealt in oil..." "We must return to that kind of cinema!" "Here's the script..." "I'll read it right away." "I'm very curious." "And when..." "Teresa..." "As soon as I've read it, I want to confer with you." "Just a moment!" "We must help this girl because she's persistent." "You're combative, sweet and you have great ideas." "You have..." "Sweetheart, where are you hiding?" "You're where?" "You want to come over?" "Look, I'm with some friends right now." "Take a cab." "When you're in the cab... take off your panties, but don't let the driver see you." "Actually, yes, let him see you just a little..." "Wait, I can't decide." "I'll be right back." "It didn't work last time." "I don't know why." "So I had installed on the bedroom ceiling a gigantic mirror..." "He's like that: impish." "He's perfect for the movie." "Almost sixty and not one wrinkle." "What you were saying, that he can make the character more human... it's important." "He's watching, right?" "Say it!" "He liked the project a lot." "He's practically agreed to do it." "What a great prospect, a new film together!" " What a nice surprise!" " Yup, here I am." "Did you bring your swimsuit?" " And your wife, still as beautiful?" " More than ever." " And she was talented." " She disagrees." "She's still ashamed of that period." " Did you try to convince her?" " Of course!" "She went back to her first love: music." "She sings in a choir." "That's not good." "She really was very good!" "Too bad." "For your children." "They'll be thrilled." "You shouldn't have." "Are you kidding?" "We worked ten years together." "When are we meeting Pulici?" "I can't wait to meet him." "I always wanted to make a movie with him." "Whenever you want, we'll set it up." "How long since we've seen each other?" "Since Cataracts?" "I told you the title was no good." "I recut the movie, shortened it a bit." "I renamed it All of Aidra's Men and in Poland it was a hit." "I knew there was something in that movie." "Why did it flop here?" "I was the only one not to lose money on this movie." "I find your idea of a two-bit Italy very entertaining." "Softer, Jerzy!" "It's hilarious!" "You're all so ridiculous!" "You only talk about television and Berlusconi." "Your country is stranded half-way between horror and folklore." "You're exaggerating!" "You're so used to trash." "Every time we think that Italians have hit rock bottom... nope!" "You continue to dig." "You dig. and you sink even deeper." "Lower..." "You scrape!" "This is like a party!" " Yes, daddy is starting a new movie." " Bravo for daddy who makes movies." "We can't have a party without mommy." " She's coming." "She's just finishing rehearsals." " No, she's eating out." "A friend came to get her." " It was a girlfriend." " A man friend." "She'll be back around half past ten?" "She didn't say." "She went out." "So what does the Caiman do about these accounts?" "To prevent people from finding them he buries his tracks in companies they call "off-shore."" "They belong to figureheads, people who say they're chairmen, executives, who pretend the money is theirs, when it really belongs to the Caiman." "See how crafty he is?" "That's enough." "I want Aidra stories." "That's enough." "I want Aidra stories." "I like Cataracts better." "Aidra's hair is as dark as coal." "She is unrecognizable and she wants to start again..." "What are you doing here?" "Where's the babysitter?" " I sent her home." "It's late." " Yes, you'd better go home." "Where were you?" " At the theater." " You didn't tell me." "They had tickets, so I went." "Who had tickets?" "Friends." "Our friends." "You know them." "And why don't they invite me anymore?" "Because they know that we're separated." "I see." "Stop it!" "Here he is!" "Come on, daddy's here." "Take a look at this mess." " Four flat tires." " I'll take it to the shop." " Four tires." "It's a really idiotic practical joke!" "Don't worry." " Hurry, we'll be late for school." " We're already so late..." " ... there's no point in going anymore." " Don't get cute." "Come on!" " Where are you going?" " Rehearsals." "I'm late." "I'll take you." "I told Teresa I'd be late." " But do you rehearse all the time?" " Our first performance is in ten days!" "Is Teresa young?" "Yes, but don't worry." "It's just a working relationship." "I'm not worried." "I wanted to know if she had experience." "No, but she has talent." "You should come by the studio." "The sets are magnificent." "I thought everything was going badly and here I am making a movie about Berlusconi, with a famous actor, Marco Pulici." " I even have the budget for it!" " I'm really happy for you." "You see, that's how life is." "Work restarts..." "A serious movie, important." "A movie about Berlusconi." "Did you have lawyers read the script?" "Not yet, but don't worry." "But on the other hand, I'd like you to read it." "There's a small role..." "I have to go." " I'd like you to play it." " Please, don't start this again." "Why?" "Yesterday, Sturovski told me, "Why did she stop?" "She's talented!"" "You remember how he speaks?" "That's ancient history." "Yes, I'll be right there!" "Let's get serious." "You're doing better, right?" "You need to get organized, especially for the children." " To be able to spend time with them." " Where?" "I sleep in my office!" "Maybe it's time to get an apartment where the children can bring over their things." "I'm starting a film." "I don't have time." "Plus, I don't agree." "I have an idea that might help." "With my parents' help," "I could buy your half of our apartment." "That way, you could buy a smaller one in the neighborhood." " You're helping me by kicking me out!" " It's not like that." "The corporation's most important executives came to my house for the party." "And I personally bought jewelry with a care...  indicative of my perfectionism." "So, to each lady, with the help of a computer," "I gave over the years earrings, a bracelet,  a necklace, a brooch." "So as not to repeat myself and to choose jewelry in a way to create something complete,  an array of the jewelry given out over the years." "It's a documentary, just to get some ideas." "You need to construct a character." "Yes, but my Caiman must have more facets, more nuances." "Try this cheese." "I was telling Teresa that the Caiman must be more nuanced." " Agreed?" " No!" "Berlusconi is entirely self-made." "It's a novelty..." "A completely negative novelty!" "You see, we agree!" "We must consider all angles." "The hero must be likable." "Otherwise, the audience..." "Help me out here." "You're the producer!" "He can't just be negative." "People must care about him." "When Gian Maria..." "Volontè made Investigation of a Citizen, the character was unlikable, but also..." " Funny." " Stop with the nonsense." "Fascinating!" "The important thing is to show what that man did to our country." "The state where he put that two-bit Italy of yours." "Enough of that!" "Let's drink to The Caiman." "Where's your proof?" "Your evidence?" "Your witnesses?" "Only the fertile imagination of judges who manufactured a case against me!" "We have an Italy that gives more room to private interests and less to the State." "An Italy with more private interests and less State." "Less State!" "Here are the controls." "Each one corresponds to a delegate and each delegate to one vote." "Red:" "Against Green:" "For... him!" "The selection of extras isn't bad." "Yes, but I don't want a crowd around the Caiman," "I want real people, to see the faces." "You've told me a thousand times, but we have to decide on a number." " Bruno was saying nine hundred." " He said that?" "Nine hundred meals, nine hundred tax charges?" "Nine hundred extras is too much!" "We don't have enough money." " How do we manage them?" " Nine hundred for the whole movie." "That's still 100,000 euros." "This is the layout for the house..." "For the Caiman's house." "I was hoping for something flashier, more nouveau riche." "But this is flashy!" "Plus the movie screen..." " It aggrandizes." " That's it." "It's better to do less, but do it well." "Because we have to do half of everything." "Half of the decor, by pulling together a few sets." "Half the project plan, half the extras, half the film stock..." "There's no money." "We have to do half of everything." "I've only made two shorts." " So?" " I don't think I'm up to this." " They're all asking me what to do." " They were rude to you?" "No, maybe I'm the one who isn't being clear." "I can't do it." "I've never done this!" "Well, you'll do it and you'll be great." "This is too hard for a first feature." " It should have been more personal." " But this is personal!" "Something I know better, closer to me." "The production designer has a new idea for the Caiman's house." "Later!" "Don't panic." "Otherwise, I panic too." "And stop talking about your short films." "I'm liable to get curious." "I'll watch them, I'll hate them and I won't let you make this movie." "Go back to work." "Look..." "On Sunday, I'm having lunch at my parents' place in the country." "If you'd like to come with your wife and the children..." "Let's see..." "I'd be thrilled to come." "Eat up..." "That was mine!" "Go on, eat!" " This is daddy's new place." " It looks nice from the outside." "Good evening." "Keys please." "4, 567, 226 euros on 554 screens..." "An average of 5016 euros." "War of the Worlds is doing better than Batman and Star Wars III." "On Sunday, we'll go see War of the Worlds." "I'm fed up." "You always pick scary movies!" "First of all, we choose together..." " Giacomo, who chooses?" " You do." "And then, who told you it's scary?" " My friends." " Mommy!" "Plus, it's a movie for grown-ups:" "they sex!" " They what?" " They sex." "I don't think they have a lot of..." " Cuddles are until when?" " Ten years." " Another ten years..." " No, you stop when we're ten." "Too bad!" "How did things go with the psychologist?" "Her dinosaurs are ugly and she doesn't have a lot of Lego's." "Why don't you and Mom reconnect?" ""Reconcile!"" ""Reconnectile. "" " Learn the right words!" " You, stop it!" "Come on, time to go to sleep." " Who's better:" "Dida or Buffon?" " I don't know." "Who's the better goalie, Dida or Buffon?" "That depends on the match." " But which one is better?" " For me, it's Dida." "For me, it's Buffon." "Good night." "Are you home?" "The match!" "?" "They called me at the last minute." "Three kids got sick." "It's late." "I'll put Mommy on." "The field is very big." "Why didn't you call me?" " What does "big field" mean?" " That it's big..." "Yes, I think he's with the reserves." "Are there reserves here?" "They don't know." " How many to a side?" " Eight." "What?" "It must be eight to a side, because they have eight." "There are goals everywhere." "There are goals everywhere." "I don't know which they'll choose." "No, the field isn't brown." "It's green, and full of dust..." "It looks like soil with some gravel in it." "No, I don't have the right shoes on, and it's getting in everywhere." "Oh, Andrea?" "Yes..." "I think so." "No, I'm not asking him." "I'm embarrassed." "All his friends are here." "Coach, does Andrea have the right shoes?" "Yes, it's fine." "I have to leave." "He's whistling at me." "I'll go change Margherita." "We were expecting you with the children." "It's so nice out here." "Andrea had a very important match." "It's the first time he plays on a big field." "They're playing eight to a side." "Normally, it's five." "If you plow on an incline, the clumps roll away and the vines get damaged." "It depends on the incline, on the soil..." "Olive trees need water for two years and then grow by themselves." "But you have to clear the field." " What is it?" " I wanted to see the time." " Hoe." " That's the technical term." "After the olive harvest..." "I have to make a call." "The match is over." "Ah, those matches!" "We take them to the press and I stick around to make sure they press my olives right away." "Otherwise the oil turns rancid." "What's the final score?" "2-2, that's great!" "Who scored the goals?" "And I check that..." " She's asleep." " Well, of course." "You were just there!" "What's wrong?" "I went to look." "You're anxious and you make me anxious." "Calm down." "She just went to see if she was asleep." "I know she "just went to see if she was asleep. "" "I've never seen you anxious over Margherita." "You're blaming me for not getting up all the time like you?" "Poor Luisa." "She was just worried." "Of course, she's a good mother and I'm not!" "And you always take her side!" "Why are you doing this?" "Wait, there's something going on here..." "I'll call you back." "Everybody knew!" "Your brothers, your parents..." "And they're all happy!" "Why didn't you tell me anything?" "We're always together and I don't even know you live with a woman." "You've never introduced me to your wife, not even today." "She didn't come because of the match, which I missed in order to witness this kind of scene!" ""I'm a mother like that, you, you're like this. "" ""My mother always takes your side... "" "I don't even know if my son has made any progress." "My wife knows nothing about football!" "Fortunately." "And let's say I was in the process of falling in love with you..." "I would look really stupid!" "You're in love with her?" "Careful, I'm jealous!" "I said "let's say. " Don't mess with me." " How did you get this baby?" " We went to Holland..." "I don't want to know!" "Be quiet!" "It weirds me out!" "And I don't think I'd understand." "You'd explain and I wouldn't understand." "So let's drop it." "This is where they'll put the Caiman after his death." "He dies at the end?" "No, but he's rich and he had his tomb built to order." "That way when he dies, he'll be a little happy." " So what do you think?" " I might like this movie." " More than Cataracts?" " Let's not get carried away!" "I'd like to talk to you for a minute." "Everything OK?" "Great!" "The sets are magnificent!" " The family is well?" " Sure." " How many children do you have?" " Two, 9 and 7 years old." "How old are they?" "I just told you:" "9 and 7." "I have one who's starting secondary school." "Puberty..." "We were young once too." "We know that..." " Any problems?" " No, it's this job." "We see our children one week." "The next month we don't see them at all." "We should spend more time with them because children sense a father's presence." "They need it, especially at that age." "So, we have to make choices." "To behave like a man!" "Agreed, but I don't see where you're going with this." "I'm sorry for the movie, for Teresa, because she's talented." "You know how to pick them." "She's talented." "So?" "I'm taking a year..." "How do they say?" "The years where you don't do anything..." "a sabbatical year!" "When?" "You know what my son told me?" ""I turn on the TV hoping to see you. "" "That made me think." "I need to take a break." "Take it after the movie." " You made a commitment!" " I didn't sign." "And, just between us, that's not the issue." " You don't want to play Berlusconi?" " I've never backed down from anything." "Allende, Vietnam, the struggles for actors with Gian Maria..." "I want to take it easy." "What will you do about the Pole?" "You want me to tell him?" "You'll take care of it?" "Maybe that's better." "You're like the producers of the past." "You understood right away that I was..." "Give me a kiss." "Take care." "You'll find a way, you'll see." "I got his voice mail." "He's coming." "You know Marco." "He works a lot, going from one set to another." "These days, he spends a lot of time with his children." "Do you realize the opportunity you have!" "Pulici is a like a Stradivarius." "You barely touch him, and he plays." "Let's not get fixated on the actor." "There's more to this movie!" "The subject:" "Two-bit Italy..." "But you need a solid actor!" "For example, if he wasn't there, the movie would lose a lot, but it would have..." "It would have?" "It would have..." "It would still have its power." "I don't think so." "If he wasn't there, you wouldn't make the movie?" "No, she's a beginner." "We need a famous actor." "But why are we talking about this?" "What's happening?" "Teresa, come here a minute." "Pulici is dropping out of the movie and Sturovski is going to drop us." " Why?" " He can't." "I did what I could." "I'm at the end of my rope." "I don't even have the strength to go back to the table." " I have to go." " Where?" "You see the blonde over there?" "That's my wife." "We've been separated for six months and I have no idea who that guy is!" "Go, go!" "Why did you do something so horrible?" "What do you want from me?" "You're scaring me!" "Don't you think about what it does to the children to see their father living in this shitty furnished apartment?" "That has nothing to do with this!" "Admit that you're the one who punctured my tires, asshole!" "Are you nuts?" "And what if it was true?" "And who was that guy in the restaurant?" "We're separated!" "The children know it." "Everybody knows it!" "What do you want from me?" "Nothing." "I only destroyed a sweater." "It was a present." "It was beautiful." "What do you want?" "It was a beautiful present." "That's why I ripped it." "Goodbye, Paola." "What do I do?" "Anything new?" "The bank is looking for you." "It's urgent." "Teresa also called." "There are actors stopping by." "I tell them to leave their photos?" "We also got a call from the "Cinema and Psychoanalysis" festival." "They want a copy of Maciste vs. Freud." " Do I send one?" " Whatever you like." "Are you stopping by this afternoon?" "No." "Pulici quit the movie." "Sturovski is pulling out." "We're no longer making the movie." "What?" "The project collapsed." "But you have to make this movie." "It must be made!" "Flat and yellow!" "What can't I find this piece?" "What did I do to you?" "Hi." "Cut!" "The natives are in place." "Everyone around Columbus!" "Without the shoes." "We'll do a tracking shot, but you have to move very slowly." "You explain it to them." "It's Columbus's triumph." "No one believed in him, but, after seven months of suffering at sea..." " Oh, I didn't know." " Seven months!" "The world is grateful to you because it's bigger." "So smile." "Where?" "I was saying, smile." "Like that, great!" "No, the director was telling me about Columbus's smile." " What do we do with the Dominican?" " Get him out of the shot." "Towards Torvaianica." "We'll have a pizza all together." "Hey, savages, what's the pizzeria called?" ""Da Vaverone" in Torvaianica." "I got it!" "Enough!" "No, nothing." "An actor needs to focus before a scene!" "Just two more takes, darling, and we'll be done." " Action!" " I hung up." "Your majesty, my happiness at seeing you is as great as the ocean I have just... crossed." "Sorry, let's do it again." "Places!" "From the top!" "... wife Bonomo, born in Rome, residing in Rome." "The parties, whose identities have been duly notarized, agree to the following..." "Everything OK?" "Are you sure?" " It's a very important step." " We know." ""Bruno Bonomo sells, concedes and transfers his rights amounting to half of everything to Paola Zamorani, holder of the remaining rights who thus becomes the sole proprietor... "" "Right at me!" "Get in, we're closing up." "Daddy, help!" "Let's keep cool!" "That's the wardrobe truck." "Our costume designer works there." "That's the electricians' truck." "You're the one who pays all these people?" "How do you do it?" "Daddy has enough money to show one day in the Caiman's life." " Which one?" " The day his trial ended." "It lasted a very long time and at the end, he'll be declared guilty or innocent." "Bruno, we're almost ready." "What if the movie is too expensive and you don't have the money?" "Don't worry about that." "What if the movie isn't a hit?" "If it's a hit, it's a hit." "If it isn't..." "You won't make movies ever again." "Giacomo!" "Places!" "Bodyguards!" "Bodyguards, to the cars!" "Come on, this way!" "Teresa, we're ready to roll." "So..." "Are you ready?" "Places please, everyone." "Go ahead." "Roll camera." "Rolling!" "Action." "Say it louder." "Action!" "Let me remind this court that today I address you not only as the accused but also and especially as a citizen to whom the majority of Italians entrusted the mission and the responsibility of running the country." "Precisely because you're in charge of this country, the Italian people have the right to know if you..." "With all due respect, you're attacking me as president of the Council and that cannot be allowed to a member of the court." "If you want to get into politics, resign and get yourself elected!" "When I had cancer, the Left gave me six months to live, one year maximum." "Because they didn't think they could beat me in the elections but only with help from my cancer or from the courts." "The anomaly is not me, but the communists and their hatred of me." "Their political use of justice, that's the Italian anomaly." "We cannot waste the citizens' money on a trial based solely on lies!" "I'm the only one to have governed through an entire legislature." "And I've introduced more reforms over 5 years than the Left has over 50 years." "The Left wasn't in charge but it was in power." "In schools, universities, courts newspapers, television the magistracy, the Constitutional Court." "In a deposition, your chief administrator has admitted the existence of slush funds in the corporation's foreign accounts." "Do you intend to defend yourself from such a serious accusation?" "I invoke my right to be silent." "The Left is so sad." "It's sad and it makes people sad." "I wanted to bring back hope to this country." "Alas, half of Italians can't manage to hope because they only know how to hate." "The Left knows only how to do one thing:" "hating me." "You were spending large sums of money on the regular payment of court officials for committing acts against their duty." "They were listed in your books as salaried employees?" "Don't answer that." "I'm being reminded that I'm late." "The Greek president awaits me for an important state meeting." "I was hoping this time the president..." "I belong to a troika..." " Go!" "... at the head of the European Council." "The accused continues to shrink from this trial." "Yet, I read here: "All citizens are equal before the law. "" "But this citizen is maybe a bit more equal than others, since the majority of Italians... since the majority of Italians freely voted to entrust him with their government!" "My allies were nothing." "They were fascists." "I put them in government." "I made them into ministers." "They were Christian Democrats flagellating themselves." "I reassured them." "Then, those of the Northern League..." "All of Europe told me, "Be careful." "They're racist. "" "I brought them back to reason." "I put them in government even though they insulted me and called me mafioso." "I placed them all in government." "And not one today to give me a phone call." "It's been five years since the first pre-trial hearing." "The accused has done nothing but to shrink from the proceedings." "He has not appeared when he committed to." "He's done everything to push through laws that would prevent the conclusion of this trial." "What was at stake here was the very possibility of celebrating the fact that the courts could fulfill their function at the service of the State." "Your Honor, one last thing before the court retires." "I hope you're aware of the fact that with your verdict, you could change" "the history of our country." "Mr. President..." "They called from the courthouse." "They're ready." "So are we." "Let's go." "Mr. President, what verdict do you expect?" "... is condemned to serve seven years of incarceration, is forbidden from holding any public office, and forfeits all legal rights for the duration of the sentence." "The court furthers condemns the accused to reimburse all legal costs." "The sentence is to be carried out within 60 days." "This court is adjourned." "In a liberal democracy, judges apply the law." "They don't engage in resistance, resistance, resistance against the one who was chosen by the voters as their leader." "In a liberal democracy he who rules can be judged only by his peers, meaning those elected by the people." "The judicial estate wants on the contrary to claim the power to decide instead of the voters." "And I would say the time has come to stop them." "With my conviction, our democracy has been transformed into a regime." "A regime against which all free men like you have the right to react in any way possible!" "Translation from the Italian:" "Silvia Bonucci" "Translation from the French: rentboy for KG"