"Previously on "New Amsterdam"..." "You will not grow old... you will not die... until you find the one." "I almost died." "You meet your true love and then die?" "Doesn't sound too romantic to me." "My heart exploded chasing some guy on the subway." "And you're naked." "Right again." "Who are you trying to impress?" "amsterdam." "I think she was there." "Who?" "The one." "The one who'll make me old like you." "I'm a 65-year-old man." "You're also my son." "She's out there somewhere." "It just seems like the only think you care about these days is finding this girl." "She's an E.R.Doc at st.Francis." "Her name is sara dillane." "new york's always been full of people talking to themselves on the street." "everybody worked hard for themselves." "They were crazy." "Nuts." "Delta tango zulu." "Charlie... tango echo." "Babylon." "brother." "Eyes in the back of your head." "Babylon!" "Delta... tango zulu." "Charlie tango echo." "man." "Street full of hostiles." "Rosey dozey?" "I don't think so." "I see you!" "brother." "So?" "So what?" "What you got under that shirt?" "You wearing a vest?" "Wh-what?" "Lookin' to go to paradise?" "Go away." "You scare my customers." "Go!" "I'll tell you that." "I'll make you a martyr." "You in such a hurry to get to heaven?" "It's hot." "You got some water?" "you go away?" "achmed." "Damn keen on the quick foot." "'Aight!" "Back to base!" "Back to base!" "Back to base!" "Back to base!" "Unnecessary." "Unnecessary." "It's gonna be ok." "Can you tell me your name?" "Forget it." "He's got no clue." " Where'd you pick him up?" " Union square." "He was having a chat with gandhi's statue." "Sounds harmless." "Then he got violent." "Sara dillane-- what do you know about her? takeout tandoori." "You've been doing your due diligence." "Never had a coronary over a woman before." "Sometimes a coronary is just a coronary." "Face it--you've been eating omelets now for nigh on 400 years." "I have the arteries of a 35-year-old." "You keep telling yourself that." " Dr. Prender." " Dr. Dillane." "we think he's a vet-- not sure who he is vet." "How did he present?" "hallucinating." "gave him an antipsychotic." "He should be lucid by now." "I'll take a look at him before I go to the V.A." "Thanks." "what are you waiting for?" "The right moment." "why not just walk up to the woman and introduce yourself?" "How do I explain what happened?" "She there when you died?" "where he took me." "You're gonna have some fancy footwork to do." "harold." "Where have you been?" "serial number." "U.S.Army." "Retired." "Emphasis on tired." "I don't remember my serial number." "You do remember where the V.A.Is?" "doc." "No way." "Why not?" "You work there." "You have to ask?" "too." "Come see me tomorrow." "About 5 P.M.?" "I'm gonna get by the doorman?" "I work from home." "I let you in." "Thank you." "dr." "Prender." "hi." "This is dr." "Dillane." "again." "Did you ever locate my john doe?" "he couldn't have just gotten up and walked out of there." "He had a massive M.I." "It would have felled an elephant." "his heart stopped." "Flatlined." "He was dead." "I called it myself." "So where is he?" "ma." "Saturday's fine." "What time?" "Ok." "Ok." "All right." "too." "I'd love to meet your family." "You wouldn't like them." "like the rest of the family?" "Teaches history at queens college." "History." "Fascinating." "Right." "ages ago." "It was still kings college." "Of course you did." "So what are we doing here?" "Amsterdam." "Yeah." "On our way." "I don't think we need to wait for the M.E.To tell us that dr." "Prender got her head caved in." "That the weapon?" "covered with blood?" "I was being rhetorical." "You know what rhetorical means?" "too." "for her work with america's veterans." "We get a running start right there." "A lot of those guys got issues." "Wound tight doesn't even begin to describe it." "santori?" "the good gulf war." "You got issues?" "I've worked through my rage." "marquez." "I recommend it." "you a vet?" "3 times." "coast guard." "Not the air force." "Don't like heights." "no border patrol?" "Crime of impulse and opportunity." "Rage." "Personal connections." "Someone she knew." "computers." "Way ahead of you." "It's already in the works." "you should look into her husband." "He found the body." "Called it in around 9:00." "My favorite part of the job." "Sorry for your loss." "Got an alibi?" "Always go first to the nearest and dearest." "And he's upstairs." "New hope for post-traumatic stress disorder." "Dr. Evelyn prender and dr." "Martha fox." "I'm gonna take this with me." "Hope it helps." "let's go upstairs." "Roughly." "I--I was at my office at sloan-kettering." "finishing some work." "patients." "I left a little after 8:00." "uh..." "I found evelyn." "We'll need names." "I understand." "dr." "Prender?" "I'm an oncologist." "thoughts who might have done this?" "We thought we'd start with your wife's patients. mostly female." "She had an award in her office for her work with veterans." "Evelyn does..." "V.A.And the E.R.At st.Francis." "Not here?" "uh...gel with her park avenue patients and with the neighborhood." "St.Francis?" "Yeah." "I can give you the name of her colleague there." "Uh...sara dillane." "dr." "Dillane?" "Yes." "Detective marquez." "This is detective amsterdam." "May we have a moment?" "Dr. Prender's husband gave us your name." "of course." "You're here about evelyn." "What a terrible thing." "Have--have we met?" "I have one of those faces." "Tell us about her work." "Evelyn specialized in veterans' mental health issues." "what did you say your name was?" "John amsterdam." "We'd like to interview her patients." "If we could take a look at her files... you know that's privileged." "We'll have a court order by this afternoon." "Come back then and talk to an administrator." "I can't help you." "but...time's everything in a homicide investigation." "If you can." "mention a name... evelyn was worried about a guy named lonny amadee. convinced she was gonna medicate him against his will." "delusional." "Post-traumatic stress." "Raging." "They used to call it soldier's heart." "Soldier's heart?" "post-traumatic stress syndrome." "different names for the same thing." "lonny amadee's got it." "we have a gsw in the E.R." "I have some other questions for you when you have more time." "so..." "I'll call you." "Make an appointment." "I'll be waiting." "What was that about?" "What?" "you were flirting with her." "I wasn'T." "Shamelessly." "uh" "I know." "It's your face." "what can you tell us about dr." "Prender?" "Prender wanted to put me on this drug." "Some kind of blocker she called it." "Beta blocker." "What's the big deal?" "It takes the edge off." "that's just how she said it." "Takes the edge off." "No big deal." "lonny." "Dull the memory." "Make isafe." "What's wrong with that?" "Anbar province." "Corpse on the side of the road. give him a proper burial." "It was booby-trapped." "V.C.Did the same thing." "2 guys in my squad blew their legs off at the knees." "I watched them bleed out while the medics tried to save them." "Why wouldn't you want to forget something like that?" "Because that would mean it didn't matter." "That it was all for nothing." "In vain." "But that's not even what I remember most." "The corpse...was a kid." "An 8-year-old boy." "Gangrene." "doc?" "No need." "You'll die if I don'T." "Sorry I didn'T." "Wish I had." "You'll feel different when it's done." "Ether." "Running low--again." "walt." "Do me a favor?" "Save it for somebody else." "It'd be a mercy." "I swore a solemn oath." "Solemn oath doctor." "I guess you have no choice." "I don'T." "for what it's worth." "ever had it?" " No." "You?" "for the last 300 years." "Seriously." "Ok. 350" "Whatever." "Amadee's girlfriend says he was with her." "Of course." "You don't believe her?" "I think she was lying through her teeth." "Everybody lies." "Even when they don't have to." "they lifted some prints from the weapon." "Running them through afis and the army C.I.Lab now." "The myth of fingerprints." "you don't believe in fingerprints?" "No two people in the world have the same fingerprints?" "untestable hypothesis." "You'd have to fingerprint everybody in the world to prove it." "pally." "guaranteed." "Amsterdam." "Be right there." "What?" "It pisses me off when he does that." "Better get used to it." "So unkind." "So who's harold wilcox?" "He was walking down the middle of broadway raving about dr." "Prender." "And he had this." "He had an appointment with her that day." "It wasn't in the books." "About the time the M.E.Says she was murdered." "I'm gonna call the lieutenant." "When will he be lucid enough to talk?" " in a couple hours." " In the meantime" "You want to tell me how you got up from the dead and walked out of my E.R.?" "I remember the heart attack." "I remember seeing you on the platform just before. full of tenderness and concern." "wasn't it?" "not an angel." "Of course I was concerned." "You had a heart attack on a subway platform." "what's the next thing that you remember?" "waking up in the hospital." "In the morgue." "and then you just got up and left." "Yep." "That's not eve happened before?" "A patient rising from the dead?" "no." "How long have you been an E.R.Doctor?" "3 years." "Don't change the subject." "to bring you back." "Thank you." "I didn't save you." "You must have." "Your heart had stopped." "I couldn't do anything about it." "obviously." "Your blood work was curious." "It had anomalies." "Anomalies." "A toxic level of lead." "Native american genetic markers." "A great-great-great- great-grandmother was part lenape." "Lenape." "The original inhabitants of manhattan." "The ones who sold it to the dutch?" "Old wives' tale." "it never happened." "You know what?" "Maybe you should run more tests." "You'd be up for that?" "personally." "Absolutely." "I don't--I don't remember about dr." "Prender." "You had an appointment at her office." "I don't know." "I'm walking down broadway and then they brought me here." "Then they told me what happened... and you lost it." "precarious." "that's why we're gonna hold on to you for a couple of days." "Ok?" "Ok." "Is this what they mean by the city that never sleeps?" "Which is why it looks like hell in the morning." "You saw her." "I can tell." "She's gonna run more tests." "Wait'll she gets the results." "How did you explain the dying/not dying thing?" "I didn'T." "I see." "I want her to get to know me first." "what a tangled web we weave." "Spare me." "I hate getting parental advice from my children." "Do they take requests?" "When they're written on a $20 bill." "Ask them to play how long has this been going on?" "Amsterdam." "Ok." "We got a hit on the fingerprints." "You don't seem too happy about it." "Usually I can tell when someone's lying to me." "Must be losing your touch." "sergeant." "trying to help them." "There was blood on your jacket." "I fell." "Nosebleed." "Dr. Prender's blood." "Dr. Prender's?" "Is the blood back from the lab already?" "No way." "Smooth move." "Make the perp think you've got forensics." "I would have done the same." "sergeant." "but you did." "I just wanted to talk to her." "sergeant." "What did you fight about?" "Never no fight." "you picked up that piece of glass and you struck her." "No." "I knelt down... and tried to help her." "That's how I got the blood on my jacket." "After you hit her." "I don't remember that at all." " You remember picking up the glass." " yeah" " Yeah." " i do" "She was all bloody." "She tried to say something." "I tried to wipe the blood off." "And then...she made a little sound... and she died." "I tried to help her." "But she died." "You tried to help her." "After you hit her." "You saw her lying there in her own blood." "I did." "You felt bad about it." "Yeah." "I did." "harold... and you killed her." "I don't know how I would have done that." "Did she try to make you do something you didn't want to do?" "Maybe." "put you on medication?" "could be." "Yeah." "Could be you killed her." "I guess I did." "You guess you did... or you did?" "I did." "He opened the door and the guy walked right through." "You killed dr." "Prender." "I did." "I remember now." "I..." "I did." "I killed her." "Well and deftly done." "he'll thank you." "He'll curse me first." "Operation enduring freedom website." "harold." "staff sergeant." "afghanistan." "how is he?" "Fever's gone." "No infection." "Letter home?" "telling her the good news." "What's her name?" "Mary." "I'm sure she's fine." "there's nothing I can do for her." "How do you feel?" "My leg hurts." "I can't give you more morphine." "doc." "It's not the part of my leg I've got that bothers me." "It's the piece that's gone." "The part you sawed off." "Yeah." "That's common." "something fierce." "it's called." "That feeling leaves." "huh?" "It'll fade away eventually." "doctor." "Excuse me?" "Fade away." "eventually." "I'm thinking sooner rather than later." "et cetera." "Follow-up letter to dr." "Prender's article on ptsd." "Alludes to litigation involving dr." "Prender." "Lucas vs.Prender." "Evelyn prender was the defendant... psychiatric malpractice." "how it works." "found a publisher." "We never have as much time as we think." "I wanted to ask you about a lawsuit." "Your wife was a defendant." "Lucas vs.Prender?" "Yes." "A patient's family sued her for malpractice." " You've heard of recovered memory?" " Yeah." "that lawsuit helped evelyn realize how terribly mistaken she'd been." "That's when she started working with veterans." "I suppose." "is the opposite of recovered memory." "as opposed to the ones you can't remember." "before we met." "I--I don't really know the details." "it wasn't something she liked to talk about." "Who would know?" "what can you tell us about the lawsuit?" "Evelyn and I were partners when the lucas family sued her." "Susan lucas was one of dr." "Prender's recovered memory patients." "I was always very fond of evelyn." "But..." "I can't forgive her." "Why is that? but she actually recanted." "Recanted? urged them to return to their families." "The perpetrators." "The cause of their misery." "very damaging. that her father never abused her?" "She became my patient." "We'd like to speak with her." "Give me your number." "I'll pass it along." "I'm sure she will." "And you and dr." "Prender?" "amicably." "Do you still practice recovered memory?" "I can't abandon my patients." "Some of them have been with me for years." "Shouldn't they be getting better by now?" "the root causes primal." "that susan lucas' father did abuse her?" "I have never doubted that for a moment." "There's no greater crime... than for a parent to do that to a child." "how old was susan when she became dr." "Prender's patient?" "That's when everything changed." "That's when the whole world turned upside down. work." "Maybe I should talk to somebody." "Sure." "Whatever you want." "I'll pay for it." "you're accused of being a child molester." "Your whole life is in shambles. convinces your precious child that you committed unspeakable acts." "You sued dr." "Prender." "We had to do something." "said we had no standing." "Her own family." "We couldn't sue the doctor that destroyed everything we had." "though." "The lawyers didn't give us a refund." "We'd like to talk to your daughter." "So would I." "She hasn't spoken to us in 10 years." "Have a nice day." "Angry guy. except for the fact we already have a suspect in custody." "Why are we doing this?" "You already got wilcox to confess." "Staff sergeant harold wilcox-- the guy was a hero." "Evelyn prender was trying to help him." "felt emasculated." "I want to keep working this just a little longer." " Wilcox reminds me of someone." " Who?" "Another vet." "Someone I knew a long time ago." "Someone I failed." "Sullivan... he's melancholy." "It's temporary." "I'm not so certain." "He's pining away for something he'll never have." "What's that?" "His old life." "Nostalgia." "More than that." "they call it." "Soldier's heart." "too long." "What can I do?" "Sit with him." "Talk to him." "I haven't the time." "we've all done that." "What?" "Studied too much war." "we'd all have soldier's heart." "Maybe we do." "wilcox confessed." "You broke him." "That's what I'm afraid of." "Amsterdam." "Yes." "See you ere." "That was the daughter." "Susan lucas." "about her father." "yeah." "Dr. Prender tried to apologize." "And you wouldn't accept it." "I know my memories are true." "You know your father abused you?" "I do." "And I know he won't take responsibility for what he did to me." "And I know he blames dr." "Prender for everything." "If he'd just... he'd say he was sorry..." "I don't know." "Maybe I could forgive him." "Do you think your father could have killed dr." "Prender?" "My father's capable of anything." "But why now?" "The lawsuit was years ago." "Because he's going bankrupt." "Because my mother's leaving him." "And he blames dr." "Prender." "For ruining his life." "What about you?" "too?" "No." "She helped me." "She's the one who helped me remember." "that it never happened." "I think it was just too much for her." "What was?" "The truth." "What happened to her patients." "so she decided it wasn't real." "But it was." "I didn't hate dr." "Prender." "I felt sorry for her." "James lucas." "hated prender with a passion." "but nothing places lucas at the scene." "we already have a suspect in custody whose fingerprints are on the weapon and who's confessed." "Amsterdam doesn't buy it was wilcox." "Of course not." "Forensics and a confession-- that's too easy for amsterdam." "He's gotta go fishing for more esoteric suspects." "the daughter?" "She's got no alibi either." "Says she can't remember where she was that day." "she staked everything on her therapy." "you know what?" "It never happened." "After she destroyed her family." "too." "Whatever." "Knock yourselves out." "because the D. A.Likes the guy we got." "And so do I." "You saw her lying there in her own blood." "I did." "And you felt bad about it." "I did." "You tried to help her." "What are you doing?" "Watch this." "I did." "I was there in the observation room." "I didn't see it." " See what?" " I led him." "Watch." "harold." " Yeah." "And you killed her." "I led wilcox." "Got him to remember something that didn't actually happen." "but I did." "I ended up hurting him in the worse possible way." "Which is exactly what prender did to susan lucas and her family." "You guess you did...or you did?" "I did." " That was a false confession?" " Yeah." "What are you gonna do about it?" "Follow evelyn prender's example." "I remember now." "I did it." "I didn't do it?" "No." "How do you know?" "How do you know I didn't do it?" "How do I know?" "Sullivan." "Now give me the gun." "doctor." "I ain't nothin' but grateful if I didn't kill that woman." "But how do I know for sure?" "I'm not sure I can live with myself." " I can help you." " Can you?" "Can you give me my leg back?" "I remember hitting her." "It never happened." "It's a false memory." "the way that I was?" "I think not." " I picked up the glass." " Yeah." "She died in my arms." "don't!" "That part's true." "That part of what you remember is true." "You didn't kill her." "I'll prove it to you." "How?" "Arrest the person who did it." "What are you doing here?" "Thought I'd make that appointment." "You could have called." "I could have." "Follow me." " What are you doing?" " Checking my pulse." "That's my job." "It's just a little experiment." "It's not just traumatic events that make the pulse race." "This won't be traumatic." "It is racing." "Told you." "I read the articles you wrote on ptsd therapies with dr." "Prender." "Evelyn was intensely interested in how memory works." "Especially the effect of trauma on memory." "not bury it." "Traumatic events are seared into the memory by adrenaline." "Adrenaline?" "the pulse races." "That's why soldiers and crime victims and holocaust survivors and the victims and first responders from 9/11 have had such a hard time putting the past behind them." "You ok?" "When did dr." "Prender change her mind about recovered memory?" "Her epiphany came one day when one of her patients and making her eat it." "Fried babies." "Think you'd remember something like that." "That's when evelyn realized the whole thing was just hysteria and that she'd been complicit in encouraging these destructive fantasies." "She had a partner at that time." "Leonard macvittie?" "They had a really bitter falling-out over it." "Are you sure prender's ok with this?" "didn't he?" "Relax." "and whatever we find is admissible." "I wish we had a warrant." "There's an old one in the glove compartment if it makes you feel better." "What exactly are we looking for?" "Prender said his wife was publishing a book." "Why would she hide the manuscript?" "Someone found out she was writing a book." "Someone didn't care for something that was in it." "Someone asked her to take it out before it was published." "When she refused... someone killed her." "Do you have an idea who?" "I'll tell you when we find it." "It's a desk." "I already looked through it." "It's a campaign desk from the civil war." "Heavy suckers." "Fascinating. so they usually had a hidden compartment built in." "Like this." "You are a freak of nature." "so I've been told." "Dr. Leonard macvittie." "It must have been a real shock to you when she recanted." "Evelyn caved. she abandoned the truth." "Did you know she was writing a book?" "Was she?" "prominently featured?" "I don't see my name anywhere." "Sorry." "garbage." "Libelous trash." "Which page was that?" "The page where dr." "Prender accuses dr." "Macvittie here of knowing the therapy was bogus." "That the memories they were recovering were false." "Isn't that called malpractice?" "What case was that again?" "Susan lucas and her family." "maybe they'll sue dr." "Macvittie this time." "You were still treating her for abuse that never happened." "unethical." "Have I left anything out? anything else" "We're just the messengers." "Ok?" "You can't sue us." "But if he could... he'D...kill us." "Ok." "These are dr." "Macvittie's prints from the manuscript page." "And these...are from the murder weapon." "I've identified 18 ridge characteristics in alignment." "Which is about as definitive a match as you can get." "Want to pick him up?" "I'll take santori." "He just loves shrinks." "What are you gonna do?" "Doctor's appointment." "Everything ok?" "Routine tests." "thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." "For what?" "It's a long story." "Get yourself some help." "Some real help." " I'll try." " Don't try." "Do it." "Find somebody." "All right." "Somebody who knows what they're doing." "You did what you could." "but the physician botched the convalescence." "but not how to cure his melancholy." "Melancholy." "It's a mystery." "It either gets better of its own accord or not." "Still... as you suggested." "It...it might have helped him." "I've written something." "Published it myself." "Thank you." "Leaves of grass" "What are you grinnin' about?" "I'm remembering an old friend." "He gave me a copy of his book." "It'd be worth some money these days." "Somebody we heard of?" "He used to be famous." "who knows?" "Better strike while the iron is hot." "by the way?" "I need to follow up on that." "Dr. Dillane?" "Detective. ask you about those test results." "You should come by the office." "Of course." "this is detective amsterdam." "Detective." "this is my husband robert camp." "Pleased to meet you."