"What do you mean Monday?" "You should have taken the sign down last Monday!" "What!" "We signed the contract seven weeks ago." "I can see you don't run a real estate agency." "You run a fourth-rate gambling den!" "We'll take it down!" "What do you mean "we"?" " You have a tool box?" " Yes..." "Go get it and I'll help you." "Juani!" "Juani!" " Get me some pliers." " What's all the shouting?" " That woman's driving me nuts." " God!" "Morning, madam." "Is the new neighbor off to a bad start?" " It's not her, thank God." " Really?" "Her father's the new neighbor." "It seems he lost his wife recently, the poor man." "Though if she was anything like the daughter..." "Here." "The pliers." " Good luck with the pliers." " Thank you, madam." " Wasn't so difficult, was it?" " Well..." "Hurry, I don't have all day." "That goes in the bedroom." "Mom!" "Where's your dad?" "Give me the car keys." "Did you lock it?" " This box to the bathroom." " But, Mom..." "Hurry!" "Brute!" "Honestly!" "Why does he have a cell phone if it's never on?" "I can't believe it!" "This woman will be the death of me." "Alfredo, come on." "Well?" " Here or on the bedside table?" " I don't know." " Ask Grandpa, it's his house." " Hey!" "Take these chairs to the kitchen." "Don't leave them there." "At last!" "Where have you two been?" " Why isn't your cell on?" " Cuca." "I loaned you the car only an hour ago and you already crashed it." "Are you crazy?" "I didn't crash the car." "Really?" "Well, the front headlights are smashed." "Are you deaf?" "I did not crash the car!" "It was an old lady in a dark red car." "Why didn't you tell me before?" "You wouldn't let me." "You see?" "You don't know what you're talking about." "I told you to park it" " in a parking lot." " Sure!" "How do you like the apartment?" "Fine." "I'm on my way." "You should have been at the clinic 15 minutes ago." "I got held up." "What happened?" "I can't explain now." "I'm arriving." "That's why I called, Mom." "I can't go today." "I have an urgent meeting at the office." "I'll stop by later." "There's no need." "Yes, there is, Mom." "I have a few questions" " to ask you." " I have to hang up." "I'm in the car." "Bye." "A control freak like his father." "Well, that's that." "The washing machine and microwave are plugged in." "There are plenty of delis in the neighborhood but I left you some chicken and rice to heat up." "The bathroom light's fixed." "Let's go." " Your dad needs to rest." " I'm coming." "Here." "Javier, forget the dog and come say goodbye to Grandpa." "The janitor's name's Goyo." "He'll give you a hand with everything." "Bye, Grandpa." "If you need anything, call us." "Come on, Cuca." "He'll be fine." "Bye, Dad." "Call us anytime, okay?" "Did you give Juan your new number?" "I'll call him tomorrow." "I'll call him if you like." "No." "I'll call him." "Call him." "It'll do you good to go outwit him." "Honey..." "Cuca." " Sorry." " Don't worry." " Good evening." " Good evening." "Come on, come on." " What did you want to ask me?" " Let's go inside, Mom." "We'll talk inside." "Give me the keys." " Mom." " Yes, I'm coming." "What's the matter with you?" "That's the old lady who crashed into the car." "I got a statement from the bank and there was a withdrawal." "What did you spend the money on?" "Living expenses." "Mom, it was 1,400 euros." "What are you insinuating?" " You want the credit card back?" " No..." "I'll give it back if you want and pay back every..." "I'm not asking you to do that." "I just want to know what you did with the money." "Let's talk about something else." "Are you staying for supper?" "Mom..." "Something simple." "There's no food left in the house." " Mom!" " Don't worry." " We can phone out for some." " Mom, no!" " Will you just answer me?" " Answer what?" "Have you been helping Alejo out again?" "Why do you have to mention Alejo?" "Just a minute." "I'll get that." "Saved by the bell." "What you did is a complete lack of respect for others." "I'm going to call the police." "Not only for damaging private property but for death threats to a child." "I'm sorry, but this is the first time" "I ever set eyes on that child." "No more threats!" "Calm down, please." "What is it, Mom?" " I don't know." "She's crazy." " No," "I am not crazy." "This evening your..." "Is she your mother?" " No!" " Yes, Mom!" "Go on." "Your mother dented my car and drove off." "My son saw it all." "Don't you have a dark red car?" " No." " Mom..." "Light red." "I will not move from here until you accept responsibility" " for the damage." " Please, calm down." " Your insurance policy." "Get the policy." " I can't." " What?" "I didn't make the last payment." "How irresponsible!" "How can you drive without insurance?" "What if" " you'd killed someone?" " But I didn't." "It was just a little headlight." "Two headlights." " All right, two little headlights." " Calm down, madam." "Get an estimate for the repairs and call me." "I'll send you the money." "Some people should have their driver's license taken away." "And some people shouldn't have a driver's license at all." "That woman is crazy." "So much fuss over a little headlight." " Mom..." " What?" "When she calls tomorrow, I'll tell you the amount to write in on the check and you give it to her." "I don't..." " Listen, Mom..." " I am but I can't." " Why not?" " Because I don't..." "I don't know where she lives." "But isn't she your neighbor?" "No, she isn't my neighbor." "You've got it wrong." "It's her father who moved in." "Then give it to him." "Listen to me, Mom, please." "Here's the check." "Make sure you don't lose it." "Don't you trust me?" "Don't you trust your own mother?" " Are you serious?" " Yes, I am." "Go on." "I've no energy for that." "I'm very tired." "Come on, Alfredo." "The exercise will do you good." "You can't punish yourself like that." " Cuca called you, didn't she?" " No." "Yes, she did." "She called you." "Don't lie to me." "Okay, but don't change the subject." "I'll pick you up tomorrow at nine." "No, Juan, really." "You have to get back to a normal life." "My life will never be normal again." "I'm trying to help you, my friend." "And I appreciate that." "But if you want to remain my friend, don't lean on me." "Got that" "I have my daughter." "Whatever." "Well..." "Either that old man is as rude as his daughter or he's as blind as a bat." "Napoleon, come here." "Come here." "Come on." "Javi!" "Juan told me you wouldn't go for a walk with him." "Since when have you been talking to Juan?" "Since Grandma died." "Go on, get changed." "I'm not going." "I'm on vacation," "I got up early and came all the way over here." "Come on, Grandpa, be cool." "Hello?" "Mom, this is the third time I've called you." "Why didn't you answer?" " I knew it was you." " Are you okay?" "Yes, I'm radiant." "Your neighbor's daughter rang." "She gave me the estimate for the repairs." "Now write this down." "1,470 euros." "She's a thief!" "She can't get away with that." "Let me talk to her." " I'll get her to lower the price." " Don't do anything!" "Just give her the check." "She's robbing you." "By the way, it's Carla's birthday on the 24th." "I'm telling you now so don't say..." "When did I ever forget one of your children's birthdays?" "Last year." " I was in Seville." " Write it down." "I'll pick you up on the 24th." "In Seville!" "She says she was in Seville!" "Alejo, I can't allow this." "Just think." "Remember..." "Remember Juanjo's exhibition?" "Remember that nice lady who said she was the gallery owner and that you could exhibit there?" "I went there." "That's good." "I went." "She told me how much the commission was." "They charge a fortune." "I mean, if you have the money..." "How much?" "A lot." "And you have to exhibit with three or four others." "No." "And for just 3 paintings..." " No, no..." " I need to exhibit on my own." "A place like this..." "Yes..." "Smart, modern, appetizers, drinks..." "Perfect!" "I understand." "Then you should speak to them." "I did." "And?" "It might be too much." "Money, no..." "It can't be too much." "1,200 euros." "You see..." "1,200 euros!" "That's what the night owner told me." "I should talk to the other owner." "I know him better." "Actually..." "The police." "Hello, Mom." "Did you give her that check?" " There was nobody home." " Mom," " keep calling." " I will." " Until I find someone there." " Where are you?" " With the Meninas at the Prado." " Mom!" "I have to go." "Some man's been following me." "I don't like the look of him." "He does odd things with his hands." "Bye for now." "Would you believe it?" "He's always telling me what to do." "Anyway..." "Shall I get the check?" " Yes." " You'll pay, right?" "Yes." "What's wrong?" " No money?" " No." "None at all?" " None." " Nothing?" "I'll pay." "Okay, we'll be in touch." "Thanks very much." "Bye." "It's nice and well-located, isn't it?" "I don't know." "There's another opposite and next door." "Yes, opposite and next door, but not here." "And it's a good idea." "An idea everybody else has already had." "The town's full of cyber cafés." "The best ideas are original ones." "It was the same with that video club of yours." "You're bringing me down again." "That's your specialty." "Hugo and his cousin love the idea." "And they love the place." "All they need is our decision." "It's not only the decision, there's the money, too." "Didn't you speak to your dad?" "No, not yet." "I told you to when he sold his apartment." "The money was fresh then." "Then I told you to when he bought the new place." "He must have made at least 100,000 euros." "Vulture!" "Good afternoon." "Good afternoon." "Bonaparte, come here." "Bonaparte." ""Dress me slowly for I am in haste."" "I'm Elsa." "Elsa Oviedo." "Your neighbor from apartment J. J for Josephine." "Gunny..." "Josephine, Napoleon," " and Bonaparte." " Alfredo Ponce Cabeza de Vaca." "Strange last name." "How can I help you?" "You can help me by taking this check." "What is it for?" "Didn't your daughter tell you?" "Ah, yes, the repairs to the car." "Now just a minute." "1,470 euros." "That's highway robbery." "Pardon?" "Two headlights can't cost that much." "Even if the car was imported." "What are you insinuating, madam?" "Nothing." "It's just that when I look at this amount..." "Got 1,400 euros my five grandchildren could eat for a month." "A month?" "No, two months." "Give children who lost their mother." "Their father an out-of-work widower, and now this." "Your daughter died?" "Yes, well no, not my daughter, my daughter-in-law." "A lovely girl." "A family destroyed." "I help them the best I can but with my pension, it isn't very much." "And now the youngest is seriously ill." "He has a very rare disease." "A rare virus." "Another disaster like this was all he needed." "I'm sorry to hear that." "So am I, believe me." "Is that your wife in the photo?" "Yes." "You're a widower?" "And I'm a widow." "For 27 years now." "What about you?" "Seven months." "Seven months is nothing." "The first year's the most difficult." "Well..." "Anyway..." "Goodbye." "Goodbye, madam." "Cold!" "Wretched!" "Elsa." "What did I forget this time?" "This." "If you need the money..." "No, I can't accept it." "Your daughter was rude to me." "Pay no attention to Cuca." "She's temperamental but a good girl." " Cuca?" " Yes." "Her name's Alicia but we call her Cuca." "No, I can't." "Here." "Keep the check and give me the money when you can." "I'll give my daughter the money to calm her down." "The most important thing at the moment are your grandchildren." "Well... you are an angel." "Nothing like Cuckoo." "Okay, I know that was a bad joke." "And you didn't like it." " No offense." " None taken." "Alfredo." "Thank you." "The daughter must take after the mother because that widower is charming." "Mom, what are you doing here?" "I've been waiting for half an hour." "Get in." "Yes." "How did it go" " with the bar owner?" " Gine." " Good." " He liked the paintings." "But..." " I don't know." " What?" "He won't bring his price down." "I'll throw my paintings into the river." "And then myself." "You don't have to do that." "You'll have your exhibition." "No questions." "And don't say anything to your brother." "My lovely old Mom!" "And don't call me old." "Dumplings!" "Your favorites." "All the way from Arturo Soria?" "No, Velazquez." "But they're just as good." "We don't have the car." "Here, Dad." "Your decaf." "By the way, did that Argentinean woman give you" " the check?" " No." "What!" "I spoke to her son!" "She gave me cash." "I thought she might try to pull something on us." "Well, she didn't." "She brought the money." "Also," "Elsa is a very nice lady." "Nice?" "That Argentinean tramp's..." "That's enough!" "Don't call her a tramp." "And what does her place of birth have to do with it?" "But Dad, she had no insurance." "And you should see how she exploits her son." "You're wrong there, too." "She helps him." "He's a widower and out of work" " with five children." " Give children?" "Yes, five." "Anyway... how did it go with that place you went to see?" " We want to set up a business there." " A cybercafé." "It's already set up." "We only need to pay for the transfer, and the rent." "Paco's friend Hugo and his cousin want to become partners." "And we... wanted to suggest that you become a partner, too." "It's a great business opportunity, Alfredo." "And you wouldn't have to worry about anything." "Well... just put up a little money, that's all." "How much would I have to put up?" "60,000." "Well, actually, we need 90,000." "Of course, we'd take care of the work side, don't worry about that." "I'll have to think about it." "Look, Dad, we really need you to give us a hand here." "If we don't set up a business it'll be hard to get anywhere." "Paco's been out of work for some time, and it's not only us." "It's Javi, too." "We have to think of his future." "Well, I haven't said no." "Let me think about it." "Of course, of course." "Hello?" "Alfredo?" "This is Elsa, your neighbor from apartment J." "J for..." " Josephine." " Ah, it's you." "How are you?" "Fine." "I just wanted to say thank you for that gesture of yours." "It was so kind of you." "You already thanked me." "It was nothing." "Well, first, I didn't thank you." "And second, since you were so kind..." "Have you had supper?" "No." "I don't eat much" " at night." " I know." "But how about a snack?" "Some cheese, or ham." "So I planned..." "I was thinking of something more formal." "A glass of liqueur, a nice cup of coffee..." "I don't know." "Whatever" " you fancy." " There's no need." "Alfredo, I think you're being rather rude." "And don't tell me it's late because I was looking in through your window last night and the lights were on till very late, Alfredo." "I may be rude but aren't you being rather... indiscreet?" "That's not an answer to the invitation I just made... that glass of liqueur and all the rest." "You don't know how important it is to me," "Alfredo, being able to thank you." "Well..." "All right." "Right, I'll be waiting." "See you soon." "That was a lot of work!" "The girl in the photo is me when I was young." "If you'd met me fifty years ago, you'd believe me right away." "Really." "We were very much alike." "I was busty, too, we were the same height, with platinum blond hair..." "We were identical." "People sometimes mistook me for her." "My husband didn't like that too much." "Twenty-three years!" "Twenty-three?" "I thought you said it was twenty-seven." "No, I'm sure I said twenty-seven." "I say twenty-three but there's the four years we were engaged." "Sometimes I say twenty-three and sometimes twenty-seven, depending on how much I miss him." "Today I miss him less." "What was her name?" "Anita Ekberg." "In "La Dolce Vita"." "That film of Gellini's with..." " Gassman." " No!" "No, no, Mastroianni." "Mastroianni, that's right." "All my life I've dreamed of seeing the Fontana di Trevi." "It's smaller than it looks." "How do you know?" "Don't tell me you've been." "Yes, some years ago." "I never got Pablo to take me." "And after coming all the way to live over here." "We were blacklisted." "It was terrible." "We came over to Madrid, so close, only a stone's throw away from Rome." "But it was no good." "There was noway." "He just wouldn't take me there." "Then shortly after, he died." "God knows where he is now, regretting he never took me." "Now tell me about yourself." "What was your wife like?" "Tidy." "She was tidy." "And?" "Tidy, I see." "Always organizing things." "Your life, too, no doubt." "And did you like her way" " of organizing everything?" " I suppose so." "You suppose." "Aren't you sure?" "Yes, yes." "Another important question." "Were you happy?" "Well, we got on well." "Like friends." "I'm sorry, but I don't think..." "No, I'm sorry." "I'm being nosy." "I shouldn't have..." "Bonaparte." "He hasn't got used to the new house yet." "He's a dog, Alfredo." "He'll get used to it." "No, I should go." "Anyway, I've had that coffee as promised." "Or in other words," " you've done your duty." " Don't get me wrong," " Elsa." " No, it's true." "Go check on your dog while I get the liqueur ready." "Go on." "If it's not that bitch of a daughter, it's that old dog's dog." "Good morning." "I just couldn't get Bonaparte to calm down last night." "I was going to call..." "Are those flowers a peace offering?" "No." "For the cemetery." "Ah, then they're for her." "Well, take them to her and arrange them nicely." "I mean, since the deceased was so tidy..." "Going to the cemetery won't do you any good and there's no point." "What do you know?" "It's how I feel!" "Don't be like that." "I want to see you well." "I'll be well when I feel well." "What's this?" "Coffee with caffeine?" "I always make it that way." "And I always say don't give me coffee with caffeine." " It's bad for me." " And I always say it isn't." "I have high blood pressure." "And I'm a doctor." "You have the same problems as anyone your age, that's all." "You love being ill." "All those pills you take..." "You don't smoke or drink, but with all those pills you'll give yourself" " liver cancer." " Shut up!" "A walk tomorrow?" "I don't know." "You went out with Javi." "Don't talk to my grandson!" "Sorry, sorry, sorry." "I went too far with what I said about your late wife." "Couldn't we go back to last night?" "Oh, sorry." "I didn't know you had company." "Sorry again." "Juan, a friend." "Elsa, my neighbor." "From apartment J." "J for Josephine." "Don't say that too loud." "Bonaparte might get jumpy." "I'll leave you two to it." "No, no, not at all." "The liqueur can wait." "Anyway..." "A pleasure." "The pleasure was mine," "Josephine." "Quiet, Napoleon's listening." "Bonaparte." "Bonaparte." "Good afternoon." "Who is it?" "Alfredo, your neighbor." "I'm afraid I'm not decent, Alfredo." "It won't take a minute." "I am offended." "I am offended..." "You're not going to the cemetery at this hour?" "These are for you, Elsa." "I came for that liqueur." "I'm sorry but I've run out." "I finished it with my girlfriends." "Do you want to come in or is that all?" "I'd like to come in." "Come in then." "I was allowed to leave once, but not twice." "By whom?" "Me or Bonaparte?" "You, Mrs. Oviedo." "Oh, Alfredo." "Don't call me that." "It's too polite." "Come on in." "And he never stopped talking." "The most horrible things." "He talked for an hour and twenty minutes non-stop." "What did you say?" "He asked the same thing." ""Aren't you going to say anything?" And I said, "Yes."" "That's what I said." "I was so tired of all his chatter." "Were you ever happy with him?" "At the beginning, maybe." "But not for long." "It was his fault." "What about you?" "What's the most daring thing you ever did?" "Daring?" "I don't know." "I did a lot of things." "I put Cuca through university, gave my wife a comfortable life." "I lived for my family." "I had a good job." "Forty years working for the same firm." "Telefonica." "40 years at the same place?" "How could you spend 40 years at the same place?" "How old are you?" "Seventy-eight." "I'm younger." "Really?" "I didn't like how you said that." "Really, I'm younger than you." "I'm 77." "And have you had a lot of laughs?" "What a question!" "No, it's a very good question." "I don't think I've had many." "That's a shame." "But you still have time." "Still have time." "If you stay close to me, as a neighbor, as a friend..." "Whatever." "I know you're going to laugh again." "Doesn't agree with him." "That new balanced diet." "No, it doesn't agree with him" " at all." " That's right." "Didn't I tell you?" "You're starting to laugh again." "Not because of you but Bonaparte." "All right." "Poor thing." "He's ugly, but he's cute." "Know what you'll do now?" "You'll drink up that glass of liqueur, and eat a pastry or two while I... play you some Bach." "Bravo!" "Elsa." " How are you?" " Hello, doc." " Done all your homework?" " All my homework..." "All right, not all." "On Friday I forgot to take the green pill." "Why?" "Some new love so late in life maybe?" "Really?" "Well, we're only just starting out." "I'd say we're at a point that you could call" " a "rare friendship"." " How old is he?" "I don't know." "27, 28..." "He's 78." "But he's impeccable." "A little..." "I don't know..." "A little... opaque." "Opaque?" "Yes, opaque." "Kind of subdued." "From a lifetime of doing things properly." "Pretty boring, you know?" "Never strayed from the straight and narrow." "Never got into mischief." "And he loves being ill." "I wouldn't think he'd love that." "Doc." "This is a serious illness." "Ask anyone who knows me if I've ever mentioned... what I've got." "Never." "But he's the opposite." "Always talking about death." "I'll put some life into that dinosaur, doctor." "And this "rare friendship"." "How far does it go?" "Not too far yet." "We're at the "hand-touching" stage." "Our hands touch all the time." "And... some other things don't help too much." "He recently lost his wife." "So he's full of memories, complexes, guilt." "Weird." "It's difficult." "Just be patient." "Men can get scared very easily." "We move at a slower pace." "I'm running out of time, doc." "So he'd better get a move on." "You're not that bad, Elsa." "Don't lie to me, doctor." "I saw the results." "The levels are dropping and that's not good." "Javi, did your mother send you here to keep me company?" "No." "Your TV set's bigger." "Have you made out with her yet?" "What did you say, Javi?" "Elsa." "Have you made out with her?" "I'm your grandfather!" "I'm your grandson." "How can you ask me a question like that, Javier?" "How can I?" "I can, Alfredo." "I made you nervous." "Come on, Anita." "Don't fail me now." "Look, it's Marcello." "Marcello." "Elsa!" "I've come to take you out to dinner." "Why out?" "We could call and have it brought in." "Can't you think of a worse way to spend an evening with a lady?" "Put on a jacket and necktie and let's go." "All right, but I could go like this." " You can't go like that." " Why not?" "I don't want to be seen at the best place in Madrid with a bum." " I put my best clothes on." " Why this sudden urge?" "How should I know?" "You think too much." "It stops you from living." "Now go put on that jacket and tie." "At your service, madame." "You really did wreak havoc on that poor man but I'll fix him for you." "What do you mean "Why?"" "Because I love him." "What's wrong with it?" "It's pure uric acid." "I don't know how I'll feel tomorrow." "You'll feel marvelous with the memory of this unforgettable night." "This uric acid is delicious!" "I love you." "Doesn't love agree with that sick, frail body of yours either?" "Elsa, what are we?" "We are a woman and a man discussing the good and bad points of fillet steak." " That's what we are." " No, I mean..." "Not this." "Us." "I feel strange." "Good strange or bad strange?" "Strange." "Well, I want to know." "This is very important to me, Alfredo." "I don't want to suffer." "Strange things are happening to my heart." "You're talking like a teenager." "But I am a teenager." "Yes, you're a little girl in an elderly woman's body." "An immature old woman." "An adorable woman." "Then it's good strange." "Do you think we might get somewhere, the two of us, in the not-too-distant future?" "I can't believe it!" "He blushed!" "He's 78 years old and he blushed." "How could I not fall in love with you?" "Oops, I'm talking too much." "What's wrong with it?" "It's a mountain of cholesterol." "Stick your finger in and lick it, dammit!" "That would be bad manners." "You know something?" "You're not afraid of dying." "You're afraid of living." "You sound like some self-help book." "Aren't you afraid of dying?" "No." "Let's clarify that point." "You are a healthy man with all the aches and pains of old age." "But that's not serious." "The day you really are sick, you'll really want to enjoy all this." "You talk as if" " that has happened to you." " It happened with my husband when the doctor told him he had only a few months to live." "Poor man." "It was terrible." "Something similar happened to your wife, I imagine." "No, she died suddenly of a heart attack." "Actually, I am a bit of a hypochondriac." "No, not a bit." "And you're not even a hypochondriac." "I'll tell you what you are." "I'll tell what we'd call you where I come from." "You're a wimp." "A wimp." "Nobody dies from eating the most delicious dessert in Madrid." "That finger!" "That finger." "That's my boy!" "Here's to life." " To life." " Which is marvelous." "I wish I'd met you before." "Stop whining." "We met and that's that." " Let me." " No, I said it was on me." "I told you so." " Highway robbery!" " Give me that." "I said it was on me." "It is" " highway robbery!" " Have you got money?" "Are you scared?" "No, I'm not scared but you shouldn't have to pay a fortune for a piece of meat and a dessert." "But this isn't for a piece of meat and a dessert." "It's for the most wonderful night we've ever had and you can't put a price on that." "And when you can't put a price on something, you don't pay for it." "I don't understand." "I'll count to three." "On three, we get up" " and leave." " Are you crazy?" "Leave without paying?" "Who'd be suspicious of two harmless old fogies?" "One..." " two..." " We could go to jail for this!" "I hope not." "Three!" "Slowly now." "Slowly." " Start the car!" " It is starting." " What do you mean?" " Start!" "Well...?" "Are we being followed?" "Everything's all right, Fred." "You had visions of the police arresting us and that sweet daughter of yours bailing us out, right?" "What is it?" "What is it?" "Is there any gas in the tank?" "No." "The police!" "The police!" "They've gone." "See?" "They weren't after us." "It's okay." ""It's okay, it's okay"!" "You are out of your mind." "I may be a hypochondriac, a wimp, whatever, but you are crazy, crazy, crazy!" "I'm not used to women like you." "No, you were with one for years and years who was very boring." "Maybe so, but she was normal, serious, coherent!" "And you're crazy!" "You scare me!" " Alfredo?" " What?" " What is it?" " A pain in my chest." "Take me to a hospital." "Haven't you learned anything tonight?" " Take me, dammit!" " All right." "But we'll have to wait for a taxi because ambulances don't come this way." "She's crazy." "Crazy, crazy." "Apparently, all's normal." "Heart's beating a bit fast but nothing serious." "Has he been drinking?" "A heavy meal?" "Did something upset him?" "All of that in less than two hours." "Goodness gracious!" "I'm going to give you something to help you relax and you should go home and rest." " Okay?" " Okay." "I'll get a prescription." "Excuse me." "Oh, well." "Another little pill" " for your collection." " Why don't you go home?" "You'll never regret tonight." "I already did, I assure you." "That's not true." "The best night you've had for a long time." "One day you'll thank me for it." "Where are you going?" "Didn't you tell me to leave?" "Wait for me." "At least take me" " home." " Okay." "Imagine the waiter's face when he told the maître d' we'd left without paying." "Right..." "This is where I picked you up, and this is where I'll drop you off." "How's that ticker?" "Recovering." "You'll get used to excesses." "You're the biggest excess my old heart can take." "Hesitate two seconds longer and I'm off." "Is it too soon to ask you to invite me to sleep with you?" "And I said sleep." "It's dawn." "Yes." "It's dawn." "Get rid of those pills, Fred." "I'm your only salvation." "Stop taking them for a week and if by then you're dead," "I promise I'll buy you a new batch." "Dad?" "Dad?" "What are you doing?" "I'm going to take a bath." "Why did you come in" " without knocking?" " I was worried and..." " You okay?" " Never better." "I've never seen you bathe, especially at this time." "No, never." "So what?" "Those pills?" "Blue for blood pressure, white for uric acid, the round ones for cholesterol." "Would you mind leaving me alone to take" " my bath?" " Dad, what is all this?" "And why does it bother you so much" " that we worry about you?" " I don't need you to." "I'm fine." "And from now on, ring the bell before you come in." "And if you come in and see me asleep in bed or in the bathroom or... doing things" "I have to do in private, knock on the door like a civilized person." "And don't treat me like a sick person." "I'm fine." "I wouldn't say you were fine, Dad." "What is it?" " Have you decided to die?" " I've decided to live!" "Now, please, off you go." "The door." "Close it." "What lyrics!" ""Today could be a really good day so get the most out of it."" "That song of Serrat's is beautiful." "I really like it!" "And I really like you." "Why?" "Because you're crazy." " Hello?" " How's the love of my life?" "Oh, it's you." "I'm fine." "How are you, madame?" "Marvelously well." "Are you out?" "I can hear" " a lot of noise." " I'm going to have tea" " with some girlfriends." " Good." "You'll have to introduce me to them sometime." "No way!" "They're more dangerous than I am." "And I told them you're a sick old man." "They wouldn't believe that." "How would you get involved with a sick old man?" "I also told them you were a tycoon." "And a major Telefonica shareholder." "I think I'm going to crash." "I did." "I'll call you back." "Put tomatoes on the shopping list." "I LOVE YOU" "TACITURN ALIENATION" "Strange she hasn't come." "No, but you know she's usually late." "Yes, and she's not the only one." "Not many people." "Not enough critics." "Brito Mendez came." "He's the worst." "I think I'll start anyway." "Go ahead." "Yes, I think I will." "Why not call her on her cell?" "She turned it off." "We should have" " picked her up." " She didn't want us to." "Why not?" "She crashed her car." "She's acting weird." "Mysterious." "Ah, there she is." "Sorry we're late." "We couldn't get a cab." "This is my son Gabriel." "My daughter-in-law Laura." "And this is Alfredo, my boyfriend." "All right." "Good evening, everyone." "Thank you for coming." "Tonight is a very important night for me." "These canvases contain my dreams of the last few years and I'd like to share them with you." "I'd like to open this exhibition with the apple of my eye," ""Explosion of Pain"." "It is the most delicate of my... creations and I hope you like it and that it moves you as much as it does me." "Anyway, here it is." "Look at the intensity, the power." "The..." "You hate it." "Well, I prefer figurative painting." "I know, I know." "This... is art." "It is art because there is absolutely nothing to understand." "When art touches you, it touches you." "When it doesn't touch you... it doesn't touch you." "Yes, of course." "Does he sell many?" "Yes, some, no, he doesn't." "That's why he organized this." "I hope the people here tonight aren't like you, preferring dogs and flowers and all that." "How does he manage to support five children on this?" "Well, er..." "Strange you should ask." "It has to do with that line." "That horizontal line." "I see it and it intrigues me, I don't know why." "At the center I see a..." "a flower emerging!" "You know," "I don't think your oldest son likes the idea of our relationship very much." "Of course, you did come out with it just like that." "Just you wait till you tell your daughter." "Fred?" "The very same." "Alfredo" "Ponce Cabeza de Vaca." "You hadn't seen my work before." " What do you think?" " No..." "Do you like it?" "Yes, yes, very much." "It has great power, great color." "It's truly admirable." "I hope you're able to keep on with your vocation." "Maintaining five children must be" " very difficult." " No, Gabriel's the family man." "I'm single." "I couldn't do this with kids." "Ready?" "No, no, no..." " Question." " Yes?" "What did the critics say?" "The critics..." "Two came, one left." "Gine, fine." "Don't forget Sunday is Carla's birthday." "Ah, yes, of course." " You are coming?" " Yes." "Well?" "Well?" "Don't rush me." "Mom, why didn't you tell me about Alfredo?" "Oh, Alfredo." "What do you think of him?" "A nice boy, isn't he?" "Mom, what is all this?" "How could you do such a thing this late in life?" " Are you calling me old?" " No, irresponsible." "For a moment I thought..." "Look who's talking." "You married twice and you've been with the last one for years now." "So don't criticize." "Mom, what's with you and Alfredo?" "With us?" "I don't know." "We're together." "I do him good, he does me good." "And you know I don't have that much time to plan much else with him, if that's what you're worried about." "Does he know about your illness?" "No, he doesn't, and please don't tell him." "Now let's talk about more important things." "Do I look divine?" "Divine, Mom." "Then "Avanti, bersaglieri!" "Victory is ours."" " Hello." " Hello." " Having a good time?" " Yes, very good." "I'm glad." "You wish I hadn't come?" "No, not at all." "Are you sure?" "You seem... strange." "Well, I am strange." " Fred!" " Ah, hello." "What's that?" ""Country Morning"." "Appropriate for a girl of her age." " Really?" " Yes." "I can't let you do anything." "Mom, I got fed up of looking." "It's not that easy." "We wanted to give her a pony but it would have eaten all the plants." " Ready?" " Yes." "Come on, family photo!" "Laura, Carla, come on." "I'll put this away." "All right." "Come on, here, here." " Come on." " Mom!" "Alfredo!" "Come on!" "Come on." "Oh, no." "You wanted to come and you came." "Now you're here, you're going to play, eat good things and sing Happy Birthday and be in the photo." "Come on, Mom." "Come on." "Hold on!" "Grandfather missing!" "Grandpa!" "Is that Laura's father?" "No, mine." "He lied to me!" "He cheated on me, as simple as that!" "Big time." "I didn't care if he was in love with another girl..." "Because that's life." "I expect the same happened to you." " Never." " Of course not..." "What do you mean "never"?" "You never went after another woman?" "Yes." "You." "Well..." "You are weird, you know that?" "You didn't because you wouldn't let yourself." " That's why." " I never felt the need." "Well, Pablo my husband felt the need." "He cheated on me and I happened to find out." "From a secretary who put her foot in her mouth." "So I confronted him with it and he denied it." "So I had to follow him, catch him red-handed so he'd stop denying it." "And that's what I did." "Then you threw him out." "Yes, I threw..." "No!" "I gave him a choice." "At the door I said," ""If you're in love with another woman, go!"" "No, it was better than that." "I said," ""If you're in love with another woman, leave!"" "I said. "Have your choice!"" "Or "make"..." "I can't remember..." ""Make your choice!"" "And he was... taken aback and then we tried to put things back together again, but..." "But it didn't work." "No, it didn't work." "And I was stuck..." "Because all I wanted was to get even with him." "He'd done it, why shouldn't I?" "I didn't know what to do so I went on a trip... to London with my girlfriends." "A group of women alone, friends of mine, and we went to Portobello Road, where all those clubs with male strippers are, the ones who show it all." "And one came up to me." "You know 6 foot 3, green eyes, black hair..." "And we talked and after a few drinks" "I asked him, sort of off-handedly, how much." "I asked in English." "I said..." "I said it like that..." "And he understood and took me to a hotel like a real pro." "Mike his name was." "He was cute, very..." "how can I say it?" "Useful." "Then after that I came back to Madrid." "All I wanted was to tell my husband I'd done the same as him." "We drank tea and I told him." "And would you believe it?" "He didn't like it at all." "He didn't like it!" "In fact he actually got angry." "And from that point on he was dead for me." "Now, from what I've told you, did I or did I not have good reason to do what I did?" "If someone crashed into your car again," " it wasn't me." " I'm looking for my father." "Is something wrong?" "I went to see you." "You weren't in so I thought you'd be here." "Will you be long?" "I need to talk to you." "We'll talk later." "What's going on, Dad?" "Mom's still warm in her grave and you go after that lunatic!" "Don't insult Elsa." "She's just an Argentinean..." "And I'm an old fool?" "Is that what you were going to say?" "Give me back my keys." "I'm sorry but..." "And remember to phone before you come around to see me." "Wait, Dad." "What's the matter?" "I'm worried." "You've been acting strange lately." "Is it because of that woman?" "Dad, you're not serious about her, are you?" "Did you come here to talk about that or something else?" "On Thursday we have to sign the contract for the cybercafé." "I'd like to know what you've decided." "But if you want, we can leave it for another time." "No, now's all right." "If you think it's a good business," "I'll put up the money." "Call me on Thursday before you sign and come over for the money." "Anything else?" "No." "See you on Thursday then." "Off you go." "Down, Bonaparte." "Good afternoon." " If you're here to..." " Can we talk?" "What about?" "May I come in?" "Come in." "Look, I don't know who you are... her husband, her ex-husband, her late husband..." "That's shocking!" "Did she say I was dead?" "Yes, she told me you were dead, but I can see you're as alive as I am." "I don't want any trouble." "May I sit down?" "Thank you." "Look," "Elsa is extremely dangerous." "She lies, makes things up." "Be careful." "I loved her with all my heart and soul." "But you cheated on her." "Only after she cheated on me with a male stripper!" "As I understand it, that was afterwards, when she found out about your affair." "That's a lie!" "She said it was after?" "You see?" "She bends the truth to suit her purposes." "It was before." "She called one of those boys who..." "She said it was a birthday gift from a girlfriend." "I found out and went there." "I saw her." "I didn't know whether to kill her" " or myself." " You went all the way to London?" "London?" "It was in Buenos Aires." "Did she say it was in London?" "For God's sake!" "She's never been to London." "A glass of whiskey?" "I don't drink, thank you." "Another thing she nagged me about." "She said I was boring, had no vices..." "And I was 10 years younger than her!" "You drink, if you need to." "No, I need something else." "Be careful, Alfredo." "You do not know what you've got yourself into." "She'll ruin your life." "What else is not true?" "Everything." "That can't be." "Let's see." "What else has she told you?" "A lot of things." "That she teaches English..." "False." "She had a cassette course..." "And she'll say she speaks Italian when she's never studied it." "She hasn't mentioned that." "She will, when she tells you her big dream is to go to Rome to see the Fontana di Trevi." "She told me that." "Is that a lie, too?" "No, that's the only thing that's true" " about Elsa." " She said you wouldn't go to Rome." "She wanted us to get into the Fontana di Trevi like that actress and her Italian leading man." "Absolute madness!" "Don't you think so?" "Why?" "To get arrested?" "She is completely crazy!" "Look..." "She's very dangerous, Alfredo." "Keep away from her." "I don't know what to say." "Don't say anything and don't thank me, either." "I only did what I had to do." "I don't want others to suffer like I have." "I'll find my own way out." "Can I ask you one last question?" "Is it true that as a girl she looked like Anita Ekberg?" "Like who?" "The blond actress." "She was spectacular." "Amazing." "The most stunning blond in all Buenos Aires." "She didn't have..." "like..." "When she passed by, the ground shook!" "You know what?" "Don't lose her." "Good afternoon." "Good afternoon." "You spoke to Javi again." "I speak to him every day." "We're following your little affair with great interest." "I won't say a word about Elsa." "So she's not "the neighbor from apartment J" anymore, she's "Elsa" now?" "Anything happened?" "Juan, show some respect." "You're in love!" "I thought all you wanted was company, a fling maybe, but you've fallen in love." "Well, well, well!" "I don't use people." "That's your style." "Anyway, you should know me by now." "You're in love." "And it's doing me good." "And fewer pills." "The doctor told me..." "I'm your doctor." "You were." "I changed doctors." "Are you going out?" "Yes, I'm going to meet Elsa." "She went to tea with some girlfriends." "And I'm not saying where." "Let's go." "Take me along." "Maybe I can score with one of her friends." "In your dreams!" "Elsa!" "Elsa!" "I'm in the bathroom." "Are you all right?" "Yes." "Supper's on the table." "Coming." "You haven't eaten a thing." "Didn't you like it?" "Yes." "But..." "I'm not hungry." "Shall I make you some tea?" "No." "I just want you to hold me." "Incredible." "This scene is almost pornographic." "What made you rent "La Dolce Vita"?" "Look at Anita." "What a woman!" "I saw her in a magazine recently." "She looks older but still has that platinum blond hair and those boobs." "Are all people who have to have dialysis treatment... seriously ill?" "What?" "I said are all people who need dialysis terminally ill?" "Do you have to have dialysis?" "Just answer me." "Well, it depends." "They can live a long time." "What about older people?" "What's the matter?" "Elsa goes to dialysis." "What could happen?" "I don't know." "I'd have to see her case history but..." "But what?" "Let's just say that it's not very promising in a person her age." "Is Elsa going to die?" "My friend..." "What time is it?" "A quarter to five." "What are you doing?" "Alfredo, what are you looking for?" "Are you busy right now?" "No." "I haven't been busy for years." "Then come with me." "Where to?" "You'll see." "Where are we going?" "Good evening." "May I ask where you've been all afternoon?" "May I ask what you're doing tomorrow?" "What's this?" "Tickets." "Rome!" "Happy?" "Very." "Shall I tell him to drive past the Fontana?" "No." "I want to discover it on my own." "Like Anita." "There's plenty of time." "I'll tell you when." "Did you call first?" "Three times." "All I got was the answering machine." "Dad!" "Alfredo!" "Use your keys." "I told you what he told me." "He might be inside, sick." "Dad!" "I don't like this." "Try the bedroom." "Enough already, Paco!" "Dad?" "Cuca." "What is it?" ""Dear Cuca," "I've been thinking about that investment of yours, and I've decided not to go ahead." "I'm going to invest the money in being happy."" "In being happy!" ""I hope you won't take it too badly." "I know you'll be surprised." "Don't try to explain my actions because I can't explain myself." "But I feel good." "I'm in Rome at the moment..."" "In Rome!" ""...making a dream of Elsa's come true." "I hope I haven't inconvenienced you." "I'm sure you won't have trouble finding someone else to invest." "It's a good business." "Love, Dad."" "He tricked us, Cuca." "What can I say?" "He's right." "He's changed so much." "And..." "I'm glad he invested in his happiness." "His happiness?" "Cuca, he's going to waste all his money on that old woman!" "What should he do?" "Waste it on your cybercafé?" "What for?" "He doesn't care about the business, and that's fine by me." "And you want to know something else?" "I'm not interested either." "I did it for you." "Now, if you really want to do it, go ahead." "Find the money and do it." "Yourself!" "Come on, let's go home." "This trip must have cost you a fortune." "Somebody once told me concerning a scandalous check in a restaurant that there are some things you can't put a price on." "Okay." " Did you already have the money?" " No." "You had to borrow it?" "I stole it." "No!" "Seriously, did you have to borrow it or not?" "No, it was mine." " What?" " She looked at you." " What's the matter?" " The first one, I saw her." " What?" " These Italian girls are incredible." "She wouldn't look at me!" "She looked at you!" "This man's mine!" "It seems that Gellini would ring Marcello every Monday and he'd say, "Marcello, when was the last time we met up?" "Next week, on Wednesday, we'll meet at the Augustus café for a chat." And of course, neither of them appeared." "And they knew that they wouldn't." "Then the next week, Marcello would ring Gellini..." "What is it?" "They used to arrange to meet here?" "Here!" "I can't believe it!" "It's a sign!" "Or a lie." "No, really." "That story..." " Is it true?" " Of course it is." "I read about it in a book." "But it was actually here?" "Yes, actually here." "I'm sure..." "No, I'm not sure..." "No, I'm not sure..." "Actually, sometimes I get mixed up, what with..." "It wasn't the Augustus." "I mean there were so many..." "Maybe it was the Titus or the Andronicus or the Constantius." "But nothing cheap." "All emperors." "I'm sure it was" " the name of an emperor." " I believe you." "Good." "Tomorrow night, huh?" "Tomorrow night, what?" "I want to go to the Fontana." "As you wish." " You didn't forget the kitten?" " Kitten?" "How can you ask such a question?" "You've seen "La Dolce Vita"," " haven't you?" " Of course I have." "But you can't expect me" " to go..." " Well, I do want you to." "And I want a kitten like Anita Ekberg's... small and white." "But Elsa..." "No." "I've been dreaming about this for years." "And I want it like in my dream." " But..." " Please." "I was right when I said you were like a teenage girl." "Thank you." "Is that a compliment or an insult?" "Your beauty is an insult to all women." "Are you all right, madam?" "I'm splendid!" "Buon giorno." "No." "At this time of day it's buona sera." "Sorry." "Buona sera." "Look, I need a gatto." "Is that how you say it?" "Gatto?" "Yes, a gatto." "Miaow, miaow." "Small... piccolino... e bianco." "Yes, I see." "A cat." "We don't allow animals in the hotel, sir." "I know." "But I need a cat." "It's an emergency." "I don't understand." "Near here?" "Is there an animal shop near here?" "Animals." "Ah, a pet shop." "A cat." "You want to buy a cat." "I don't think so, not at this time." "Closed." "Cerrado." "Fermé." "Isn't there some other way?" "Some way to get a cat." "A small, white cat." "No cats." "Pardon me." "Buona..." "You're welcome." "You want a cat?" "Don't look at me!" "Don't look at me!" "200euros." "200 euros?" "You want a cat?" "A small, white one." "200euros." "Small and white?" "Small, white, blue, yellow, red... 200euros." "All right, all right." "No!" "In an hour and a half in your room." "He'll rip me off." "Small and white." "Excuse me..." "How do I look?" "Beautiful." "Very beautiful." "What's that?" "The cat." "Let me see." "What's wrong?" "It isn't white." "It's lovely." "After all, Fred, we're not Anita and Marcello either." "Are we?" "Let's go." "Let's go." "I'm so excited!" "It must be this way." "You hear that?" "The cat." "It's in here." "The cat." "The glass of milk." " What?" " The glass of milk." " A glass of milk?" " Yes." "When they get here... maybe not exactly here, but anyway," "Anita asks Marcello to bring the cat a glass of milk." "Elsa, please." "I mean, look around you." "There's not a soul in sight." "But Fred, we've come this far." "The same route, we have the cat." "Find out which store Marcello bought the milk for the cat in." "Marcello didn't buy anything in a store." "One of the crew members gave him the milk." "Really." "All right, all right." "Wait here." "Come on." "Get in." "No, we'll freeze to death." "So what?" "Would you care if you died here tonight?" "Come on." "Come on in." "There's a magical moment when they're the only people left in the world." "Then the sound of the water begins to fade." "Dear Marcello," "I have a confession to make." "I love you." "I love you more than I've ever loved anyone." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Get out of there right now!" "We're going to get arrested!" "They engraved the headstone." "She was older than you." "82 years old." "She looked younger." "What are you laughing at?" "Nothing." "Nothing."