"What are we doing?" "Are we even working out?" "Of course we are." "Just because we're not sweating doesn't mean we're not getting a good workout." "Just the kind of answer I'd expect from the owner of an Angela Lansbury workout video." "Ready?" "Flip." "Uhh!" "Eww, my ball smells." "Smell my ball." "Smell your own ball!" "Well, if I could do that, I'd be the happiest girl on earth." "I don't know what that means." "Hey, losers, how you doing?" "Come on." "Up, up, up." "We're here to work out." "Let's go." "Let's stake it!" "Let's what?" "Stake it." "Stake it!" "You gotta stake it." "Stop saying, "stake it."" "What's stake it?" ""Stake it" is my workout catch-phrase, and in addition to being a motivational tool, it is also a stylistic flourish that sets me apart." "It doesn't even mean anything." "Ok." "You two figure this out." "I'm gonna go work on my glutes." "Meaning you're gonna go sit at the juice bar?" "Yep." "You can laugh at "stake it" now, but when it becomes my "dyn-o-mite" or my "leggo my eggo" or my "hey, hey, hey..."" "Then you'll be laughing, because" "Wait, wait, wait." "What" " Who's that guy?" "That guy?" "Um, I don't know." "He's" " He's that guy." "You know, what's-his-name..." "Generic McPlain-Wrap." "No, I know him." "I just" "I mean, not from the gym, from someplace else." "Oh, who cares, Will?" "Probably from some law case where you said 'blah' and he said 'blah' and a judge said 'blah' and ten people died of boredom." "No." "I could swear I" " I" "I'm done." "I know how I know him." "You slept with that guy?" "No!" "We just fooled around." "But he's a six." "He's a seven." "He's a five." "He's a six." "Sold!" "It was just one time, you know." "I--I had just broken up with Michael." "He was my rebound guy." "Remember, I met him at the, um" "Cuddle Bum?" "That's Cuddle Bum?" "!" "God, I was so awful to him." "You know, he kept calling and calling, and I just blew him off." "Wait." "Tell me that story again." "How does it go?" "Tell me again." "No." "Forget it." "Fine, then I'll tell Cuddle Bum you're here." "It was winter." "He didn't have any heat in his apartment." "We were lying there, and he said, "Will, I'm cold." "Would you..." "Cuddle me bum?"" ""Cuddle me bum!"" "Cuddle Bum!" "Oh, that's rich!" "Oh, it's good to laugh again!" "So, Cuddle Bum's in the gym." "What are you gonna do?" "Everything's tainted." "That fridge-a-derriere has been on every piece of equipment in this place." "I'm not gonna do anything." "All right?" "I-I'm a grownup." "He's a grownup." "If we run into each other, we'll just act like grownups." "Excuse me." "Don't I know you?" "No." "I don't think so." "Come on." "Let's go." "Ok." "I just gave a homeless guy a quarter, and now I'm pretty sure it was Johnny Depp." "Karen, can you call the maintenance guy and tell him the door keeps sticking." "I hate having to reset it every time." "No." "Honey, I'm watching these burly movers clear out the office next door." "They're moving out?" "I've always wanted that space." "Have they rented it yet?" "Is it still available?" "I don't know." "You move that desk, bitch!" "Stop that!" "You work in an office." "Conduct yourself with a little dig that fine ass." "Whoo!" "Hey, sweet-cheeks." "Do fries go with that shake?" "Whoo!" "Yeah!" "You like?" "What?" "!" "How dare you?" "That was offensive!" "Filthy pig!" "Ohh!" "I..." "I cannot believe they're moving out." "I always promised myself that if that space ever opened up," "I would rent it, break through that wall, and expand my business." "Oh, honey." "You have a dream." "You know, I have a dream, too..." "To be rich and beautiful and have a great body." "Oh, look." "My dream came true." "I just wish this weren't happening right now when I'm so low on cash." "God, why did I give Johnny Depp that quarter?" "Well, Grace..." "Why don't you just ask me for the money?" "I mean, come on." "I'd give you the loan in a second." "Really?" "Are--are you sure?" "Of course I'm sure, honey." "All you have to do is ask." "Ok." "Karen, would you loan me the money?" "Well, I'll have to see a presentation." "What?" "Grace, I don't know what your business is." "I don't know what you do." "I mean..." "For all I know, you could be using the money to buy Ms. Pac-Man machines and pizza ovens." "Karen, this isn't Chuck E Cheese." "You know that I'm a designer." "All I know is there's a pizza here every day at noon." "I'm not gonna pitch myself to you." "It's insulting." "I would rather try and get a loan from a bank." "All right." "Well, suit yourself." "Never gonna happen." "You know what?" "I am gonna get that loan." "And not just because I'm a smart, successful businesswoman who's run her own design firm for five years, but also because I'll be wearing something see-through." "Here's my loan application, some information about the business," "and my profit and loss statements for the past five years." "I think you'll be very impressed." "I know that I am." "Monday morning good for the presentation?" "I'll see you at the crack of noon, and wear something sheer." "Oh, hey." "Sorry." "Are you gonna use the 30s?" "Actually, I was gonna use 35." "Oh, doesn't matter anyway, 'cause I was gonna use the 40s." "CURT:" "Who am I kidding?" "I was gonna use the 30s." "Thank God, 'cause I'm going for the 15s." "I'm Curt." "I'm Will." "I'd shake your hand, but it looks kind of heavy." "Oh, sorry." "Just a little thing I do to keep me going." "Really? "Ooh, yeah."" "Where'd you pick that up?" "The remainders bin at Lame Phrases 'R' Us?" "I know." "It's not great, but I haven't found anything that works as good." "Oh, my god." "This is total serendipity-doo." "I have just the phrase you're looking for." "Yeah?" "Yeah." "Whenever you need that extra burst of energy, all you have to say is" "Stake it!" "Stake it." "Exactly." "What?" "!" "Stake it!" "Hey, that's my phrase!" "Hey!" "So, I'll see you there tonight around 8:00." "Great." "Will..." "This is terrible." "This is horrible." "Did you see that guy that was just here?" "We are going out tonight." "How great is that?" "Someone has stolen "stake it."" "I was on the treadmill about to stake it, and this personal trainer out of nowhere yells, "stake it!"" "Do you want to hear about this guy I just met?" "So I went up to her, and I said..." "I said, "Excuse me." "I don't mind you using stake it, but you do know that it's my catch phrase."" "And she said she's been saying "stake it" for years, that her sister's ex-boyfriend invented "stake it" in Chicago in 1994 while working in a plastic factory!" "But how can that be?" "Ok, ok." "Jack." "I don't-- I don't know what to say." "I'm outraged." "We are not gonna let her get away with this." "We are gonna slap such a lawsuit on her, she won't know what hit her." "Yeah. yeah." "Wow." "Thanks, Will." "Yeah. either that, or I'll pants you in public." "Let's go with that." "Hey, Curt, it's, uh, it's me Will, again." "I'm just calling again to, uh, to tell you what a great time I had the other night..." "Again." "Uh, still love to hear from you." "You got my home number, my office, my pager, my cell." "Uh, I guess that's it." "Although, my-- my CB handle is Big Willie." "So...uh..." "Oh, crap!" "Hey, buddy." "I couldn't help overhearing..." "Because I was standing here listening." "But these incessant phone calls have got to stop." "I mean, it's been a week." "Have some dignity." "Start stalking him." "Everything's fine." "He's probably just out of town." "Hmm, or you're being blown off." "That is not possible." "We had a great time together." "A guy who is blowing you off does not go off the zone just to share a brioche pudding with you." "He went "off the zone" for you?" "God, that line's older than "this is the first time I've ever done this with a man."" "No." "I'm telling you, he's not blowing me off." "Hey, hey, come on." "Let's go ask Marcy." "She knows all the gossip here." "I swear, she's like a female version of Liz Smith." "Hey, girl, give me some spritz." "Anyway, listen, Marcy." "You know that guy that used to come in here around this time?" "Is it Curt?" "Oh, yeah." "I know Curt." "Yeah." "Well, my friend here " " Will -- went on a date with him about a week ago." "Oh, wow, are you the "Nibbler"?" "I beg your pardon?" "Well, I heard that the guy Curt went out with liked to nibble" "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "That" " I'm the nibbler." "He's working out in the afternoon now." "Did he say why?" "Maybe he's avoiding you, Nibbler." "Maybe you nibbled off a little more than you can chew." "Maybe you stop talking like that." "Maybe you'll tell me what happens if I don't." "Maybe I tell the management that wasn't a documentary you were shooting in the locker room." "Maybe I'll stop now." "So, Mrs. Walker, there you have it" "The business plan, my mission statement, and an essay on why I insist on keeping my hair this way." "So, in conclusion, the Grace Adler Designs expansion project not only will benefit Grace Adler Designs, but it will fulfill the dream of your friend, Grace Adler." "Thank you." "Oh, honey." "That was a wonderful presentation." "I mean it." "Really." "A-Plus." "Whew." "Thanks, Kar." "So, what do you say?" "Do I get the loan?" "No." "What?" "Ok, time for lunch." "See you tomorrow." "Oh." "Darn it." "It's stuck again." "Push the reset button." "Let me out of here." "What's the problem?" "I would love to let you out, but before I do," "I think I'm gonna need to see a presentation on why I should." "Hey, Curt." "Where ya been?" "Oh, yeah." "I've been really busy." "Yeah?" "'Cause it feels like you've been avoiding me." "No, I haven't been avoiding you." "Look, I gotta go." "I'll call you." "No." "No, don't" " Don't." "Don't do that." "Don't lie." "Not here." "This is a gym." "This is-- this is gay church." "Ok, look." "I've sort of been avoiding you." "To be honest, I just got out of a relationship, and, uh, you were kind of my rebound guy." "So, what?" "You were using me?" "Well, I wouldn't call it using you." "What would you call it?" "Well, I don't know." "Sort of a gay catch-and-release program?" "Sorry." "See ya." "Yeah, well, see if I nibble you again!" "Your neck tastes like vinegar!" "I'm--I'm guessing." "Will, I just heard what happened between you and Curt." "That was two seconds ago!" "She's that good." "I guess what goes around comes around." "What are you talking about?" "Well, Curt blew you off like you blew your guy off." "Oh, that is totally different." "He was a six, and I'm" "I'm an idiot." "I'm sorry." "Are you bummed?" "Yeah." "But... are you..." "Cuddle-bummed?" "Come on, Karen." "I'm listening." "Why do you deserve to be out in the world among decent people?" "Because Karen Walker helps people." "You know, I was just a scared single mom working in a factory, trying to put food on the table, but when I heard about the barbaric conditions in our workplace, I knew something had to be done." "I didn't even care how management was gonna brutalize me." "No." "I stood up on that table, I rang that bell, and I said "Union!" "Union!"" ""Union!"" "Ok, I'm gonna have to stop you." "That's not you." "That's Norma Rae." "Come on, Gracie." "I know I have my flaws." "But" " But you, Grace, you're-- You're a kind person." "I mean, you wouldn't let a little kitty suffer, much less a fellow human being, so, come on, honey." "Let me out of here." "You're right." "I'm too soft-hearted to watch you suffer, so I'm goin' to the movies." "Later." "Mitchell?" "Uh, do I know you?" "Come on." "It's Will Truman." "We went out once, like four years ago." "Will Truman..." "Ah." "I seem to remember an answering machine by that name." "Look, I just" " I want to say I'm sorry." "You know, we went out." "I never called you back." "Of course I remember you." "I" " I cuddled your bum." "Well, why didn't you return my calls?" "You know, I thought we had a good time." "I wasn't all that confident to begin with, you know, and you made me feel like I was no better than a seven." "Oh, Mitchell." "Come on." "You are" "You are not a seven." "Look, I'd just got out of a relationship, and I was lonely." "I didn't think I could handle anything more than one night, so..." "I'm sorry." "Well, better late than never, I suppose." "Will!" "I got it!" "Watch." "Stake it U.K!" "It's brilliant." "It's British." "I'm back." "So, uh, how've you been?" "Oh, pretty good." "Um, after you and I had our thing, I met someone, and, uh, we've been together ever since." "Oh." "Well, ok." "We broke up for a bit recently, but, uh, he had a fling with someone, sent him running back to me." "Oh, good." "So, happy ending." "Yeah, yeah." "Hey, he's--he's here now." "Curt, come here." "I want you to meet someone." "Wait." "You and Cuddle Bum?" "Wait." "You and The Nibbler?" "Wait." "You and Clammy Hands?" "Clammy Hands?" "!" "Hey!" "Come on, you guys." "Stake it U.K.!" "So..." "Have you thought of anything else to" "Hello?" "Hello?" "Let go of my hair!" "Not until you let me out of here!" "I will!" "Psych!" "I can't believe you fell for that!" "You know, you can be really mean sometimes." "You were really mean to me, putting me through that whole song and dance for nothing." "You hurt my feelings." "I was sparing your feelings." "Honey, I looked over your proposal, and I'm sorry, but that dog just won't hunt." "You need to listen to me." "You know, I'm pretty good in business." "How do you think I got so rich?" "You married someone rich!" "You know nothing about business." "Oh, yeah?" "Well, I know that in today's uncertain economic climate, people are taking a long, hard look at any purchase that could be considered a luxury item, e.g., interior design." "Then, when you factor in the leading economic indicator i.e., winter housing starts, the negligible impact of the recent interest rate cuts, decline in occupancy rates in corporate office space, it just seems to me that a smaller company will be better equipped to respond to shifting market forces," "but I guess you probably already knew that." "I know where the market is." "Come on, honey." "That's why I didn't want to give you the loan." "It's better you stay small." "Lean, mean, and... flat." "But, Kar, why didn't you just say all of this in the first place?" "Because expanding this pizza parlor was your dream." "I didn't wanna just poo on that." "It's better that you just think I didn't give you the money 'cause I'm mean." "Oh, Karen." "That's sweet." "Now, come on." "Bust my bust outta here." "Thanks." "Now, come on." "Give me a hug." "Got you!" "What are you doing?" "What are you doing?" "I'm gonna give you a couple of hours to think about what you did to me."