"Welcome back, dr." "King." "Thank you." "Aah!" "Aah!" "Aah!" "You're staring at me again." "No, I'm not." "Okay, I am." "You ready to talk about it now?" "I can't." "You can tell me, whatever it is." "I can keep a secret." "Stop staring at me." "You were staring at me first." "You want to play doctor?" "I can be the doctor." "You can be the patient." "Doctor-patient confidentiality." "Oh." "Mm." "Mm." "Mm." "No, no." "No, I can't talk about it." "Has anyone talked to charlotte?" "I left her a couple of messages," "But she--she didn't call me back." "Well, what do we say to her?" ""get well soon" or "sorry this happened"" "Both seem pretty ridiculous." "Is there a card that says "I'm sorry" "You got viciously beaten and robbed"?" "You need to learn to filter before you speak." "You must have talked to her." "I sent her flowers." "Oh, flowers." "Crap." "I should've sent her flowers." "hey!" "Oh, charlotte went to the hospital first," "But now she's parking downstairs," "So I need--I need, uh-- you need to go to the gym." "Shut up." "She's gonna be here..." "Any second." "Just don't act weird." "You're setting a great example." "Just tell her she looks great." "Does she?" "No, she looks like she got the crapped kicked out of her... yeah, yeah, yeah." "But if we just--shh." "Good morning. morning." "Take a good look then get over it." "If you're gonna be all nervous and annoying around me," "Stay the hell outta my way." "What'd I say?" "I said "don't act weird, " and you all acted weird..." "Like weird people." "Well, I thought it went" "About as well as could be expected." "I think it's too soon for her to be back." "Well, look, I mean, she faced everybody," "Clearly stated her needs, she told us off" "Therapeutically speaking, that's a good day's work." "Violet's right." "Either you get swallowed up by that kind of trauma" "Or you try to regain control of your life." "Charlotte's regaining control." "Right?" "I just got your page." "Elisa, it's gonna be okay." "All right, you're gonna feel a little pinch." "I'm in." "Now I just have to drain the fluid." "Thank you, dr." "Wilder." "No problem." "You did great." "Papi, I'm okay." "Really." "She isn't, is she?" "Her cancer's back." "I'm sorry." "I think the lymphoma tissue has seeded the pericardium." "We'll have to confirm with a c.T. Please don't worry, papi." "her body can't take more chemo." "The last two times, she lost all her hair," "Her mouth and tongue were covered in ulcers." "I can try something different to treat the side effects." "And, diego, we've talked about this." "Even after a relapse, elisa's type of lymphoma is curable." "I believe that, but not with western medicine." "Chemotherapy is the way to fight this." "There's another way." "I'm taking elisa to a shaman." "Oh, hey." "I was thinking about getting a latte, and then, uh," "Well, I thought of you, so I went to your office," "But you weren't there," "And I thought I'd check downstairs..." "You sound like a stalker." "I don't." "Well..." "Okay, I kind of do." "But, uh..." "Coffee?" "No, thanks." "Tea then?" "Or, um, we could get one of those iced," "Uh, fruity-chino things." "We're not friends." "You need another pelvic exam" "To make sure you're healing properly," "Not to mention follow-up labs, continued h.I.V. Drugs." "I'll take care of that myself." "Charlotte, you..." "All right." "We're not friends." "But we could be." "I could be your friend." "I'm the only one who knows what happened," "And I could, I don't know, be there for you or whatever." "I only need one thing from you." "Anything." "Name it." "Keep your damn trap shut about what happened." "his daughter has been through chemo twice," "And her cancer is back." "You can't blame diego for wanting to try something else." "Consulting a witch doctor instead of an oncologist" "Borders on child abuse." "Shamans have been healing people for thousands of years, cooper." "So even if you don't believe in it, then-- elisa's mother didn't believe in it." "This would not be an issue if alice were alive." "She would never let a medicine man" "Try to clear the trauma in elisa's soul" "To restore the balance in her body because it's crap." "You know as well as I do" "That a person's faith plays a huge role in their recovery." "So if elisa and diego believe a shaman can help, then she can." "She is sick, pete." "She needs real help." "She does need help," "And if you want to be a part of it, open your mind." "With all my health problems," "I feel like I've robbed you of your youth." "oh, my youth was spent just fine." "Every week, we come in here," "And all I can think about is, it's not fair." "I mean, first it was my diabetes." "You had that long before I met you." "It doesn't count." "And then the breast cancer." "Which we beat together." "taking care of me is exhausting." "I see it in you." "And sometimes, I-I'm afraid you'll start to resent me." "Oh, that's crazy." "No, wait, nick, let's talk about that." "How do you relieve" "The stress that her illness puts on your marriage?" "Do you exercise?" "Do you drink?" "Not for years..." "On either count." "You fight?" "We fight." "Sure." "Every couple does." "That's true." "So why is it making you so uncomfortable?" "She doesn't mean to, but-- nick." "I'm sorry." "My last patient was, uh..." "I've got some more." "It's okay, honey." "I don't want to talk about it." "Rachel." "Rachel!" "She doesn't mean to." ""rachel and nick" rachel?" "She's been with him for 20 years." "I mean, people get upset in therapy." "No, this was not an emotional outburst, okay?" "It was an adrenaline surge." "It..." "It was the kind of rage you see from an addict." "Is she taking drugs?" "Yes, but not the kind you think." "We're managing her diabetes" "And the kidney problems that causes." "But she's not a junkie." "In fact, she's the most resilient woman I know." "She never complains about her health, never stops trying." "No, no, she's incredible." "She's abusive." "Sheldon, come on." "She was a ballerina," "And nick looks like a lumberjack." "Really, I mean, how badly can she really hurt him?" "Abuse is abuse." "Would we be having this conversation" "If rachel were the one being hit instead of nick?" "Sheldon" "I'm serious." "Would you tell a woman to stay" "With an abusive spouse?" "No, but this is-- okay, this feels different." "Rachel and nick are not a cautionary tale." "They're a love story." "You ever heard of judith and holofernes?" "Famous love story-- ends with judith" "Chopping off the head of her beloved." "You know, florence" "Great paintings by rubens and rembrandt?" "You should see 'em." "What?" "Nothing." "You're just..." "A little odd" "And pretentious." "But I'm not wrong." "Something's going on with rachel." "What's wrong, coop?" "Shamans." "Shamans." "And charlotte." "Shamans and charlotte?" "N--no, no." "Mostly charlotte." "She's having nightmares." "She wakes up screaming." "I try to get her to eat." "She says she's not hungry." "I try to talk about the police investigation," "She just..." "Shuts me down." "Well, she's trying" "To put herself back together in her own way, coop." "I mean, there's no blueprint for any of this." "Yeah." "No, I-I know that." "Everyone handles trauma differently." "It takes time to heal." "You gotta put one foot in front of the blah, blah, blah." "Wow, I'm glad to see" "You hold the tools of my profession in such high regard." "Well, none of that helps me, violet." "Well, it's not about you, cooper." "It's about charlotte." "So you're saying..." "Back off." "Oh, you're a bad shrink." "Can I hide out here for a while?" "Yeah, as long as you want." "I have to report the abuse, nick." "If you say anything," "I'll deny it." "She's hitting you." "Most of the time, she's fine." "And when she's not, I can handle her." "For now." "But what I saw..." "She could hurt you." "Are you married, dr." "Wallace?" "No." "Then with all due respect," "You can't understand." "I met her right out of journalism school." "I was a reporter for the "tim"times."" "Got tagged to cover a performance of "swan lake."" "What the hell did I know about ballet, right?" "But when I saw her dance," "I don't know, she was just..." "Mesmerizing." "She has this quality like, when you're with her," "Nothing else matters." "I won't give up on her..." "Not ever." "Who sent you to spy on me?" "Cooper?" "Addison?" "I came looking for you on my own." "I figured your day was probably pretty weird," "And you might need some sugary, deep-fried batter." "So are you" "If you ask me if I'm okay, I swear to god," "I'll take this cast and knock you upside the head." "I wasn't gonna ask you that." "When I first kicked drugs, I, uh, took up running." "I mean, an addict's gotta be addicted to something, right?" "So I would get up when it was still dark," "And I would go for miles." "Until the morning I got clipped by a minivan." "I didn't get anything like the injuries that you have," "But I started craving pills again." "So..." "I was thinking that maybe you were craving pills again." "I took your advice, and I'm back at meetings," "And if you wanna go" "I grew up wrestling two brothers." "I have an incredibly high pain threshold." "Anything else?" "can--can you hold that?" "Hey." "I got nick to agree to bring rachel in." "Would you check her out?" "Of course." "Okay." "Sheldon..." "It's been a while since we discussed man troubles," "And..." "I-I was beginning to think" "That you found another therapist." "Oh." "No, I-I..." "I want to talk about charlotte." "Do you think she's okay?" "Because I don't." "But she won't listen to me." "I didn't realize you two were close." "Well, we're not exactly, but..." "I was there that night," "And..." "It was horrific." "And if it was nai or amelia, I'd know what to do." "But because it's charlotte-- she's just not interested." "It's because you were there that night." "No, she wanted me there." "No, at the time, yes, but you saw her" "When she was in her most fragile state," "Which means you're the living," "Breathing reminder of what happened." "When she sees you, she's that victim again." "I just want to help." "Well, then you'll need to find" "A more indirect way to do it." "Um..." "Hi." "Thank you for allowing us to observe." "I brought something for elisa." "The medicine men I've worked with" "Say that quartz is a very powerful healer." "So you understand my beliefs?" "I worked with a shaman in the congo" "To treat an outbreak of measles." "and you think it was the shaman" "That cured those people, not the vaccinations?" "Maybe it was one thing, maybe it was both." "Either way, people got better." "I know you think I'm crazy, dr." "Freedman." "But my only concern is that elisa get well." "We tried western medicine." "It failed." "It kept her alive." "It killed my wife." "Alice died of an aneurysm that ruptured." "Nobody could've saved her." "And elisa-- she can still be saved." "Papi, is she okay?" "elisa?" "Mija?" "Elisa." "she needs help." "She's getting help." "It's just the bad energy leaving her body." "I'm not getting a pulse." "Leave her alone." "I'm calling an ambulance." "Stop it!" "Let the shaman finish." "Elisa, stay with me now." "Come on." "Is elisa okay?" "Yes." "She was in hypotensive shock" "By the time the ambulance got here," "So she needed surgery to make a small incision" "In the sac around the heart to drain the fluid." "She's in recovery now." "Can she come home?" "She's gonna have to stay here for a few more days." "Also, I'd like to keep her under observation" "While we start chemo." "You brought elisa here against my wishes." "I want her discharged." "No, she can't go anyplace" "Until the surgical drain's removed." "Do you understand what's happening?" "She has a tube draining fluid out of her heart," "And she has a tumor that's getting larger every day," "And no shaman can stop that." "Elisa is my daughter," "And I will decide what medical treatment she" "Not if you're incapable of making responsible decisions." "Alternative therapies work, cooper." "I've seen patients cured." "With the right combination of homeopathic remedies," "Elisa can get the kind of treatment that diego wants." "Enough." "I'm sorry." "I don't care what diego wants." "I'm getting a judge to order elisa's chemo." "No, you--you can't do that." "Yes, I can, and I will." "*..." "On the other, try to leave you * * in between * * the faults of my youth *" "* I stumbled on * * the line to love you *" "Mm." "Mm." "Sam, I have to tell you something." "Now?" "Do you wanna know my secret" "Or do you want to have sex with me?" "Well, both would-- both would be good." "*..." "Through it * * years and layers start to show * * in the soil * * there is a swelling, beating rhythm to it *" "I did something the other night..." "A rape kit." "* on the one... *" "Okay, we really need to work on your pillow talk." "Well, technically, it was just some washings," "But see the thing is, is that the victim didn't want it." "Wait." "What?" "She was..." "Upset," "And I..." "Thought she might want the d.N.A. Later," "So I went ahead and did it anyway," "But then I didn't tell her." "And then I labeled it "jane doe"" "And I locked it in the hospital refrigerator," "But..." "But I didn't report it." "Well, that's illegal." "Why wouldn't you..." "* I stumbled on * * the line *" "Because charlotte made you promise." "You're staring at me." "I'm sorry." "And yet, you're still staring at me." "it's what we do-- the addisam." "We, uh, we do that." "Oh, god." "I'm starting to sound like her, aren't I?" "Oh, brother." "O-okay." "Okay, um..." "I have a thing..." "That I can't tell you..." "Or anyone." "So I'm not gonna tell you." "But I need for you to get what I'm saying." "Whoa." "Did I black out for a minute?" "Because y-you are not making any sense." "Okay." "Uh..." "Talk to charlotte." "She wants to be left alone." "Well, since when has that ever stopped you?" "I mean, let's face it, violet, you're--you're kinda nosy." "I am not." "I--I am" " I'm interested." "Okay, talk to charlotte." "She needs help." "And you are a shrink," "So..." "Do what shrinks do." "I saw elisa this morning." "She's hanging in there." "No thanks to her crazy ass father." "You really think" "Taking him to court is the right thing to do?" "I had to do something." "He was threatening to take her home." "If diego tells the judge" "He's refusing treatment on religious grounds, you'll lose." "Not necessarily." "California supreme court" "Prosecuted a mother whose child died of meningitis." "She'd refused lifesaving medical treatment" "In favor of divine healing." "Look, I get that you're worried about elisa." "I am, too." "But you're not gonna help her by tearing her family apart." "If diego won't look out for his daughter's best interests," "I will." "I don't know what I would do if she was my kid." "But elisa and diego" "Have a right to follow their beliefs." "They're not crazy, cooper." "They're just different." "And if you take them to court to force chemo..." "I'll testify on their behalf." "He never complains." "His only concern is that I'll get hurt." "I don't mean to get so angry." "I just can't control myself." "Okay." "Enough whining." "What do you think's going on?" "Well, there's nothing on the head m.R.I. Or chest c.T.," "But I did find a high level of testosterone in your blood," "Which could be caused by a tumor" "Of the adrenal glands or lungs, but I ruled that out..." "Oh, that's good news." "Or by metastatic breast cancer." "But..." "I-I had a mastectomy ten years ago." "I know, but sometimes, breast cancer cells" "Can get left behind and grow somewhere else." "That could be a tumor on your ovary," "And if it's secreting testosterone," "That buildup could cause sudden rages." "Are you sure?" "The only way to know for sure" "Would be to go in and take a look," "But surgery is a big gamble for someone in your health." "I don't care." "I want to do it for nick." "Please, dr." "Montgomery." "I-I can't hurt my husband anymore." "You got a minute?" "What for?" "It's been a few days." "I should take a look at your injuries." "They're fine." "Then this will be fast." "We can do it here or we could go to an exam room." "Let's just get this over with." "Everything is healing up beautifully." "Told ya." "Okay." "Let's take a look at your back." "Oh, here." "I got it." "I got it." "Oh." "Cooper did a crap job changing this bandage." "He didn't do it." "I did." "I got it." "When it needs to be changed again, let me know." "hey." "Sorry I had to run out so early this morning." "You want to have lunch?" "What is it with you people and food?" "I don't want coffee or tea or doughnuts." "Can't you just leave me alone?" "I was just trying to be thoughtful." "No, you came in here to check on me." "I want you to stop hovering." "I'm not hovering." "All I need is for you and everybody else to back off." "Okay, I'm not everybody." "I'm your fiancé." "I'm in this with you." "You are not inside this, cooper." "You have no idea." "And now the way you're looking at me..." "Just stop." "I can't take it." "I can't breathe." "Charlotte." "Dr. Montgomery will remove rachel's tumor, then stage it" "To determine the necessary post-operative treatment," "And if all goes well," "Rachel's testosterone levels will decrease," "And she'll have more control over her anger." "Good." "That's good." "But if the surgery isn't successful," "And rachel's rages continue-- we'll get through it." "The love you and rachel have for each other, it's a gift." "And under normal circumstances, I would work" "To keep this marriage healthy another 50 years." "But sometimes..." "Sometimes I have to counsel people to walk away." "No one stays together anymore." "They just..." "Have a fight, get a divorce," "Pretend like it never happened." "When instead, they should be fighting for each other," "Through whatever comes." "This is what love is supposed to be." "I'm never walking away." "*" "Hey, elisa." "How you feeling?" "Much, much better." "I'm ready to go home now." "You need to heal a bit more first." "Papi told me dr." "Freedman is bringing in a judge." "Please." "I don't want chemo." "Do you believe a shaman can heal you?" "Papi does." "No, no, forget your father and dr." "Freedman." "I want to know what you believe." "If you have faith in a shaman," "I will back you with the judge." "It's okay." "You can tell me." "*..." "At ease, it helps me sleep *" "Elisa, what is it?" "I don't want chemo." "*..." "Life I've watched you dance alone * * to music * * that I can't hear *" "Addison." "*..." "To hear the song *" "How long you been out here?" "I don't know." "I couldn't sleep." "Hey." "It's gonna be okay." "Not if violet doesn't talk to charlotte." "She will." "What if somebody decides to look in the lab fridge," "You know, and they wonder what the "jane doe" bag is?" "I don't know what I was thinking." "You were thinking that you wanted to help a friend." "I could lose my license, sam." "I mean, what-- what am I supposed to do?" "We wait." "Violet will come through." "* you make the world seem small * that fresh?" "I just made it." "Help yourself." "* all my... *" "Thank you, sheldon." "For what?" "Leaving me alone." "* to music *" "I wish everybody else would just, uh..." "Do nothing." "I'd do nothing for you anytime." "You know that, right?" "*" "I do." "*" "How's it going?" "Just dandy, thanks." "You know, I, uh..." "I know how hard it can be to reintegrate" "After you've been..." "Victimized," "So if you ever want to talk..." "You always been such a busybody" "Or is that just a professional hazard?" "no, actually, charlotte, I..." "I truly believe in the therapeutic process." "And after katie attacked me" "You think because a crazy woman cut out your baby," "You got some kind of an insight into what makes me tick?" "You don't." "All you got's a nasty scar and a horror story." "You're damaged goods, violet." "You..." "Not me." "You got no business telling anybody" "How to run their lives." "* you were never at rest * * you were always somewhere bound * have you got any tips" "For getting a 14 year old to talk?" "I really want to go to bat for elisa," "But she's holding something back." "Well, she's a kid, and even as adults we're..." "Reluctant to... say certain things out loud." "You know, it makes it real, and then, you know..." "You have to deal with it." "I wouldn't know anything about that." "Pete wilder--open book." "I know." "It's not fair." "I push you to tell me things," "And then I have stuff myself." "* all my... *" "There was..." "Well, it happened a long time ago," "In college," "And I never told you." "* that I can't hear, I ain't equipped... *" "Violet, I know." "* those songs *" "Or at least I suspected." "*" "We have been through..." "A lot." "And I've seen you react in so many ways." "*" "Why didn't you say anything?" "I figured that when you were ready to talk about it," "You would." "* the things you've seen * * you make the world seem small *" "Oh, I'm probably wrong." "What?" "Well, you were the first one to see her that night." "Is it possible?" "Was charlotte raped?" "If she told me, you know I couldn't" "No, I know, I know, of course." "But..." "But what do you think?" "* that I can't hear *" "I think you're right." "* to hear those songs * * you were never at rest * * you were always somewhere bound * * but as for me, I'm a simple guy *" "* I'll live and die *" "Don't." "* in this town * * and I know my home ain't big enough *" "* that it'd only keep you down * * and I'd hate to see you caged * * so all that I ask *" "What can I do?" "What do you need?" "* it ain't much *" "Lay really close to me..." "But don't touch me." "It's been a long time" "Since I wore a pair of these." "What are you doing here?" "I came to wish you luck." "Thanks." "You know, nick and rachel, they're special." "A lot of couples stay together for the long haul," "But not many stay in love." "Your parents still married?" "no, no, they split when I was a teenager." "Waterboarding in guanátnamo was less brutal than that divorce." "You close to them?" "I call my mother every week, but my father and I..." "Well, let's just say" "That when you wash out of your e.R. Rotation" "And you're a surgeon's son," "It doesn't help the relationship." "I guess it could make you a little odd" "And a little pretentious." "Who's to say those are bad things?" "I'll call you when it's over." "Alice believed in chemo, and I believed in alice," "So that's what we did." "But she's gone now." "I've seen the shaman heal people." "I think she can do the same for my elisa." "What do you want, elisa?" "What papi wants." "What about your mother?" "Alice would've pushed for this chemo." "She wouldn't want you to die." "don't say that." "How dare you say that." "She's not gonna die." "You honor, what diego is asking for" "May seem unconventional, but I have seen it work." "As an m.D. And also" "A practitioner of alternative therapies, I urge you," "Please, don't disregard what diego is asking for." "The only guaranteed cure for lymphoma is chemotherapy." "I need to take the family's religious beliefs into account" "Okay, but what kind of father just stands by" "And doesn't save their child?" "Stop it." "Please, dr." "Freedman." "If I have more chemo, my family won't make it." "We're living in a trailer park because of me." "My treatments bankrupted us," "And papi had to sell the house." "I hear you on the phone," "Begging to keep the power on." "I see you skipping meals so the rest of us can eat." "Carlos and pilar..." "They deserve a life" "That doesn't revolve around my hospital visits." "And so do you." "The shaman will save you." "No, she won't." "I'm sorry, papi." "I don't believe what you believe." "I'm not afraid." "Let the shaman take me to mama." "I think we all know what needs to be done." "Do you think I don't know what's true anymore" "Because I was attacked?" "I think working through that experience" "Has made you a better therapist." "Sam told me I should talk to charlotte." "Well, that's not surprising." "You both survived a brutal trauma." "Yeah, yeah, but the way he said it," "It was like there was more to it than that." "And then I-I just started projecting my own stuff on her." "Well, what sort of stuff?" "I wish you had been there..." "That night," "Then we could compare notes." "Unfortunately I spent the night in an interrogation room" "Getting throttled by a rapist, so..." "Is that what..." "Do you think charlotte was raped?" "the judge ordered the chemo." "You didn't have to arrange this." "I know." "I'm just saying-- I'm not completely unreasonable." "Thank you for letting us bend the rules." "I made sure she wasn't gonna sacrifice a chicken or anything." "I know I should leave you alone." "But here's the thing" " I can't." "You're not ready. cooper" "I know you." "It didn't go well, did it?" "The tumor was worse" "Than the imaging originally showed." "I couldn't resect it all." "I removed what I could." "no." "I can't accept that." "You have to stop the cancer." "H-how long do I have?" "Not as long as you'd want." "oh." "There are testosterone blocking agents" "We could try to manage your anger," "But..." "They're not very effective." "Uh, so I'm just gonna keep on hurting nick?" "There's nothing I can do?" "You can move into hospice for around-the-clock care" "With people who know how to manage your anger" "And who'll keep you safe." "What the hell are you talking about?" "Don't listen to him, rachel." "We can manage at home." "You know that's not true, love." "I'm dying." "You don't know how long you have." "I want that time with you." "I don't care what you do to me." "but I do." "Those people at hospice," "They won't know how to take care of you." "I've learned that over the past 20 years." "I'm good at it." "Well, then you'll tell them how, every day," "When you come to visit." "You'll find a place where I can go?" "Yes." "I promise." "it's the right thing, nick." "You know it is." "Please..." "Let me take care of you for once." "shh." "Yeah." "You need something?" "It was an indian summer..." "My junior year in college." "And I'd left the window open because it was the only way" "To cool down enough to get to sleep." "So when I first felt his breath on me..." "I thought, finally," "A breeze." "And then I opened my eyes." "He wrapped one hand around my throat," "And with the other, ripped off my panties." "He whispered to me..." ""shh, shh, shh, shh,"" "Like, um..." "Like you do to a child..." "Having a bad dream." "He told me not to make a sound." "And when he finished, he..." "Slammed my head against the wall" "Till my hair was sticky with blood." "I thought..." "That..." "If I stayed quiet," "Then I'd be okay..." "Like it never happened." "Because things that like, well..." "They don't happen to people like me..." "Or to people like you." "So..." "*" "I just wanted you to know..." "*" "That I get it." "I get it, charlotte." "* you were carved * * out of the sea *" "And I'm here for you." "* watermarked for your ancestry * * in the tug of war between * * the tide and the air *" "* what felt like loss * * was a victory * * 'cause you were swept to shore *" "*" "* you were carved * * out of the earth * * safe and sound * * in your second birth *" "Shelly, what are you doing here?" "The guy I evaluated last week-- lee mchenry?" "Yeah." "I think I know who he raped." "* as the lighthouse tamed * * the endless ocean roar * * against the calming light * * our silhouettes... *" "Yes, this is, uh, dr." "Addison montgomery" "At st." "Ambrose." "I have pelvic washings from a rape" "That need to be processed." "* have made you break *" "Charlotte." "What happened?" "will you go to a meeting with me?" "I'm right behind you."