"THE TIT AND THE MOON" "Relax, he won't fall." "Come on, Tete, make it to the top!" "Don't stop!" "You're doing fine, show them you got balls." "My name's Tete and I'm an "anxaneta"." "That's the kid who climbs to the top of the human towers called "castles" typical in my country." "I get scared because, a times, we fall." "And we get hurt, we hurt ourselves bad." "Jordi used to be my friend." "We called him Stallone, he was the strongest of all." "He loved nuts." "He had just bought himself a Kawasaki 750." "That's Miguel." "He's Catalan, but his parents come from down South." "His feet stink." "My Dad kids him and calls him a "xarnego" because his parents weren't born in Catalonia." "Come on, Vanessa!" "Push that chest out!" "Come on, climb!" "Those elbows!" "Come on, Miguel, that chest!" "Vanessa's breasts are hard as stone." "She's Stallone's girl." "When I climb behind her, I always feel her." "Level five, open up!" "We're doing fine!" "Come on, relax!" "Tete, show us some balls, don't look down." "Don't stop, go on, go on!" "Don't stop, damn it!" "Don't look down!" "You've nearly made it!" "Sometimes, I don't dare come down because of my Dad." "He's an animal, I don't know what's worse, falling down or hearing him scream about having balls, Catalonia's pride, the group's honor and all that." "Let's see those bollocks!" "You got it made!" "Don't stop!" "Don't stop, keep on climbing!" "Show us some balls!" "Relax, he ain't gonna fall!" "I was about to have a baby brother." "I didn't like the idea." "Come on, Secre!" "Get on up, level 4!" "The other group was Diego's, they wore pink." "They all said he was a better "anxaneta"." "He climbed faster." "That's it, Diego!" "Come on, Albert!" "Come on, Jaume!" "Diego, Robert, now!" "Come on, we got it made!" "Come on, Robert!" "You got to improve." "We can't fail." "Come on, Diego!" "Don't look down!" "I'd get angry seeing how they tossed him in the air." "I was real jealous." "You got to learn." "Go see your Mom." "When will he be born?" "Soon." "He'll be an "anxaneta" just like you." "Like me?" "I don't want a baby brother." "Come on." "You'll like him." "You'll love this bread." "My Grandpa listens to me." "Everyone says he's a little crazy." "But I love him." "What's wrong?" "Tete!" "Let's go see your brother." " I don't want to." " What?" "Come on, get going." "Get going, hear me?" "They all looked terrible, but he was even worse." "He looked dreadful." "He was wearing a Catalan cap instead of a beret like my Grandpa." "Want to see your brother?" "Look." "There he is." "Isn't he cute?" "He was a monster, he never stopped crying." "You're heavy." "Aren't you lucky, Tete?" "He'll be an "anxaneta" just like you." "Bullshit." "Ifhe is one, he won't be like me." "He won't have balls." "Tete!" "Come and help me!" " I can't." " What do you mean?" "Hurry up!" "They always screamed at me to be doing things." "It was clear they only loved him." "He was a monster." "He's ugly." "He's all wrinkled, like an old man." "Don't say that, he's so cute." "Why did I have to drink cow's milk if he could suck it from her breast?" "Careful, he's tiny." "Leave the bottle." "Aren't you going to run out of milk?" "You got a toothache?" "Show me." "All she worried about were my teeth." "She was always looking at them." "Come on, go play." "I'm feeding your brother." "He was a pig." "I felt like strangling him." "My mother's breasts were full of milk." "He was drinking it all, emptying her." "He never stopped sucking." "My mind was made up." "I'd find a breast just for me." "Women are full of milk." "It's in their breasts." " How do you know?" " Because I do." "Look." "Not bad, but a little too big for me." "Some tits!" "I bet she's full!" "Too much milk." "Whoever filled her was an animal like my Dad." "Yes, give me your "milk"." "Fill me with it." "Every night, my Dad filled my Mom with milk." "She asked him to." "Give me your "milk", fill me with it." "Easy, easy." "It was all my brother's fault." "My Dad had plenty of milk." "My Grandpa and I spent hours looking at the moon." "It understood me." "I'll visit you one day." "I'll bring the E.C. flag, you'll like it." "It's got a lot of stars." "The Catalan, too, my country's flag." "It's tiny, but there are six million of us." "I bet your American flag is real old and dirty." "I need a breast just for me." "Let me know if you can send me one." "The moon listened to me and sent me a star." "Her name was Estrellita." "I can't." "I just can't." "I love you." "You're the Fire King." "People hide to fart, they're ashamed to." "You made it into an art." "Say you love me." "I've just told you." "They were from Paris, and lived in a camp site." "Miguel was the first one to meet her." "When he touched her, he felt sparks." "Probably because he was the camp site electrician." "Good morning." "Good morning." "Could you help me?" "I can't open it." "I can't." "It's real tight." "What's wrong?" "I don't know." "I felt a spark." "Something incredible just happened." "I touched a Frenchie and I felt sparks." "Ifyou feel sparks with a Frenchie, when we get to California, you'll be short-circuited." "Even nuts are better over there." "We'll be able to surf." "The Mediterranean sea is just for kids." "Come on, I want you to see her." "Come on." "Good morning." "Hi." "Yeah, some dame." "Shake her hand, you'll see." "Hi." "My name's Stallone." " My hands are wet." " That's okay." " Alright." "How do you do?" " How are you?" "But Stallone felt no sparks." "My name's Miguel." "We already met." "My pleasure." "But Miguel did." "I think that's when he fell in love." "We live here, at the surfing school." "Her husband was a frog." "He farted in the Cava Park show." "He had a super bike." "That Harley is too much!" "Stallone liked it right away." "Don't touch it, don't." "That's my baby." ""Soft Tail 1340"." "He was a frog from head to toe." "Right away he took the French flag down." "He hated to see it so dirty." "And he always said:" ""Laissez la moto, laissez la moto, merde, merde, merde"." "Come on, bike, be good." "Don't be scared." " Come on, come on." " Get lost, kids." "Goddamn bike!" "Fuck!" "I slipped under the tent." "I wanted to see Estrellita rehearsing." "Miguel and Stallone also went to see her." "She was so pretty." "She showed me her breast, so nice, so full of milk." "I never imagined someone's breast could be prettier than my Mom's." "I too was falling in love." "Have you got any Perrier?" "No, only Vichy Catalán." "I'll take three bottles." "Shampoo." "Miguel had followed her to Mrs. Maria's shop." "She was Stallone's Mom." "She made great custard." " What are you doing here?" " And you?" " You tell me first." " Same thing as you." "I'm following her." "Now what?" "I was getting sick of finding him everywhere." "Always showing up where he shouldn't." "Every women in the shop showed me their breasts and their milk." "Hers were the best." "I walked in, ready to ask for her breast." "But I didn't, I was embarrassed." "Hi, Tete darling, what do you want?" " Thanks." " I bet her breasts tasted better than Mrs. Maria's custard." "Are you deaf?" "What do you want?" "Bye." " Milk." " Milk." "Here." "Milk." " Hello." " Hi." "He was still there." "What a bore." "I had to get rid of him." "Tete, go away." "I dreamt about you." "When I touch you, I feel sparks." "Well, I don't." "Let me be." "Besides, I'm married." "Wait, listen!" "The first ray of the morning light." "He started singing right there and then." "Worst of all, I had the impression Estrellita rather liked it." "And if she did, I'd learn to sing too." "The first ray of the morning light." "The first ray of the morning light." "I wake up wondering where you are." "Tete, hush!" "Go to sleep!" "What's that song?" "A Spaniard sang it to me today." "Just for me." "He says he gets sparks when he touches me." "He's from the surfing school." "Which one?" "The small one." "Better." "I can smash his face." "Don't be silly." "Maybe I'm his first love." "It's so cute." "He does get sparks when I touch him." "Want to see my sparks?" "Want to see if I've got sparks?" "I saw you dance." "I thought maybe we could work together." "Are you kidding?" "Miguel was really laying it on." "He stole her panties." "The pig wore them on his head." "You're cunt-struck, man, that's it." "Those panties look like a Catalan cap." "Let me be, damn it!" "I do as I please!" "Catch me!" "Ifhe had her panties, I'd take her bra." "I had made up my mind to ask for her milk." "I'm off." "Kiss me." "Don't forget to buy a cauliflower." "And Roquefort." "I brought her my treasure." "Wally, my frog." "What is it?" "What's your name?" "Tete." "Here, it's for you." " It's lovely." " His name is Wally." "So cute." " What is it?" " He drinks with a "porron"." "She offered me her breast and I touched it." "What are you doing?" "I want your breast and your milk." "What?" "My Mom won't give it to me." "Give me a little milk, please." "She took her breast out and told me to drink my fill." "It's so good." "Did you like it?" "Want to kiss me?" "I was doing just fine until Miguel showed up." "Shoot, Miguel!" "What is it?" "First, my brother, and now him." "When dawn is about to break, when dawn is about to break, if you're not at my side, my soul is broken." "See?" "You feel sparks." "Tete, why aren't you in school?" "Estrellita is mine." "Come here." "She showed me her breast!" "He wanted to steal her away from me." "He'd manage it, too." "She's got a great tit!" " I'm up to here with you." " And me with you!" "Everyone was against me." "My Dad was always going on about having balls." "Caballé called." "I'm up to my balls with your damn tricks." "Kiss your baby brother." "To make it worse, I had to kiss him." "You won't?" "Kiss him, damn it!" "That's alright." "He was disgusting." "It's alright, there, there." "I had nothing to do with the turd." "Tete!" "Come here!" "In school, Caballé always blamed me for everything." "She was as fat as a cow." "Another joke of yours." "I'll call your Dad and tell him." "I had to get rid of Miguel." "I'd move to the camp site to be near her." "Rum and sugar!" "Hurray for Catalonia!" "Good rum for all, the best rum is PujoI's." "Have fun!" "Long live Catalonia!" "She always came on after the boat and rum." "I was dying to see her." "Attention, please concentrate." "One!" "Two!" "Three!" "These things happen, I'll try again." "Attention, concentrate!" "This is important." "Attention!" "Concentrate!" "Fartman Maurice, the Fire King!" "Go away, go on." "IfI can't have you, I'll kill myself." "He was crazy." "He'd do anything to get her attention." "He even told her he'd commit suicide." "You're nuts." "He followed her everywhere, no matter what." "He spent every night hiding under her caravan." "Is that your nightingale?" "Listen, it's so beautiful." "He's in love with me." "I hate flamenco." "I can't stand it." "When I look at him, his love scares me." "Well, don't look at him." "Is he really in love?" "Shouldn't you ask me if I'm in love with him?" "Don't play with fire, princess." "The only good thing about the frog was that he was getting sick of Miguel." "I hate flamenco." "Stallone was right." "He said French people were weird." "She liked licking his feet." "What do they taste like?" "Like cauliflower." "Like hot croissants, Roquefort." "There's nothing like Roquefort." "I can hardly do it." "I burn up all my energy farting." "I can't get a hard on." "Because of the Carcassonne cauliflowers?" "No, it's the Vichy Catalán." "Close up, the bubbles aren't perfectly round." "I love you." "Now you do." "But a younger man will come along, a heavenly lover." "I'll never leave you." "You're stronger than fire." "Even the devil is scared when he hears your cannon." "Tears?" "I'll get the flask." "She loved it when he cried." "She collected his tears in a little bottle." "No, not now." "Don't." "Your tears turn me on." "I'll never understand why tears excite you." "Never." "They taste like the Mediterranean sea." "Incredible!" "Miguel sang every night." "It was getting boring." " Come here." " Yes." " I'll go check." " Stay." "Who needs light?" "You and I and the moon, it's so romantic." ""I love you so much I could shout."" ""I've never loved, never loved as much, I swear it."" "I decided to tell him I was moving out here." "Get lost." "No, I came to see Estrellita." "It must be the wiring." "What's that?" "Disgusting!" "Don't, a kid gave it to me." "He's a darling." "Listen, I'm sick of kids, sick of darlings." "What an animal!" "He nearly killed Wally, who had nothing to do with it." "But Estrellita picked him up and looked after him." "Come, let's play baguette." "The French flag had to be washed every day." "At night, she had to eat a baguette." "But she only wanted to be filled." "It's old." "Much better." "It's harder." "Tete, drop it." "Go home or I'll tell your Dad." "And I'll tell Estrellita you cut off the light." "Easy." "There." "Again." "One hand." " What is it?" " It's not for you." "She didn't give you her breast or her milk." "She didn't give you this." "What about this?" "It's her bra, look!" "I had to go." "He didn't let me stay." "I didn't want to live with my parents, or my monstrous brother." "Where were you?" "You can't take off without telling us." "We must speak." "What's wrong?" "I'm in love." "You?" "Who with?" "A breast." "Are you alright?" "Open your mouth, show me your teeth." " Let me be." " Show me." "Open up." "As usual, he was only worried about my teeth." " Who are you in love with?" " A breast." "A breast?" "Really, Tete." "Coming." "For good Romans like your Dad and yourself, duty always comes before women." "Coming, damn it!" "You're an "anxaneta"." "Him and his ideas." "Supposedly, we were Romans and owed them everything." "He was off his rocker." "He'd take us to the old monuments and make us touch them to obtain their strength." "He was a real pain." "We had to go even if it poured, there was no other way." "Push!" "For the group!" "May the strength of the stone fill your heart and balls." "This rain was sent by Heaven." "Everything changes and dies except the stones that the Romans left us." "We're all Romans, Romans in spirit!" "Come on, shout!" "We'll make a 3 x 9 castle!" " We will!" " Louder!" "We will!" "As I couldn't stay in the camp site, Miguel did as he pleased." "Hi." "I can't sleep." "All I can do is think about you." "Please, let me be." "She didn't love him." "You're upset, you need more loving." "It's my fault." "But I'm happy." "I love you." "I'm jealous." "I don't like it." "That means you love me." "One day, I'll put you in your box." "I'll take you far away." "That way, I know you'll never leave me." "Do the cannon." "The big one?" "Yeah, yeah." "I love you." "Iffarts turned her on, I'd learn to really fart." "What are you doing?" " The Frenchman." " The Frenchman?" "Hurry up or it will be cold." "Sit down." "Aren't white beans better?" "There's nothing like cauliflower to fart." "People think farting is gross." "But there are worse things, death, war, banks, airplane noise, traffic." "And Caballé!" "What's going on?" "Everyone said Grandpa was crazy." "When he was upset, he broke "porrons"." "He also had trouble with Marlboro, his rooster." "Only Grandpa understood me." "What about Caballé?" "She sings wonderfully." "No, Grandpa, I meant my English teacher." "Don't forget, good farts frighten the devil away." "Come on, eat, it will be cold." "Miguel felt terrible." "Only Stallone was happy with his Kawasaki 750." "What's wrong?" "I need her." "I can't get her out of my mind." "I'd be better off dead." "Nobody's gonna die without my permission." "Damn, Miguel!" "You gotta get over her." "You're hurting." "I'm hurting bad." "What you need is to screw real good." "Don't say that." "Don't worry, you'll be okay in California." "Plenty of chicks." "Want a ride?" "I'll take you home." "Come on." "Ain't she pretty?" "Look at her shine." "Come on." "I was feeling awful too." "I didn't have her breast or her milk." "And my Dad took away from me the only thing I had." "What's this?" "What's going on?" "Whose it this?" " The Frenchie's." " What Frenchie?" " From Cava Park." " Cava Park?" "What the fuck where you doing there?" "Tete!" "Tete, come on up here!" "Poor Stallone died." "Grandpa was very upset, he said it was unfair." "He started breaking "porrons"." "According to him, it was one way to get over it." "Everybody was very sad." "I was moved at seeing my parents cry." "Stallone had died, but I knew he'd come back." "He'd come to hold his Mom in his arms." "She always asked him to." "Miguel sang to him with all his heart." "Estrellita was very moved when Miguel cried." "She probably wanted to collect his tears in her little bottle." "He's dead." "I know." " He was my best friend." " Don't speak." "Don't cry, I can't bear it." "I need you." "I'm sorry about your pal." "Whenever the frog left, Miguel would sing to her." "Since Stallone had died, she felt sorry for Miguel." "DO NOT TOUCH" " DANGER" "Are you crazy?" "What are you doing?" "I like rain." "It's as if the sky were crying." "I like your tears." "You know, I felt sparks too." "Touch me." "I like your skin." "And I, your lips." "Don't be sad." "Let's go." "You're soaked." "He was filling her." "She liked him to sing and to fill her." "Stallone always said Frenchwomen were tramps." "The frog was desperate, but said nothing." "He couldn't fill her, he had to let Miguel do it." "People said it was because French people were so modern." "And because he was older than she." "No, don't." "Don't." "To be understood, I need some understanding." "And I'm not getting any." "You always worry about those who suffer." "You'd give anything for a caress or a compliment." "I love you above all things and I've lost it all." "What do you see in him?" "When he sings, he sounds like an angel." "How would you know?" "Ever heard any?" "Why are you crying?" "It's the shampoo, it stings my eyes." "Shitty Spanish shampoo!" "Come on, come here!" "Here!" "Get in here!" "It's your castle." "You stay in your castle like a queen." "Queens stay inside their castle." "Estrellita!" " Open up." " No, I won't!" "Let me out!" "You're my queen, that's your castle." "You stay inside." " Maurice!" " Get it?" "Let me out!" "Maurice!" "Fucking bike!" "Let me out!" "I went to Stallone's tomb." "I was sure I'd find him." "Hi, Stallone." "Are you sleepy?" "I need some flowers, can I take some of these?" "I wanted Estrellita to comfort me." "Ifshe didn't, I'd kill myself too." "Tete!" "I'm locked in." "They're lovely." "They're for you." "Can I come in?" "I want to tell you something." "Try to open." "The door is locked." "Climb on the roof." "She needed me." "I'd save her, and we'd leave forever, far from the frog and the "xarnego"." "Her breasts would be mine." "Easy, don't hurt yourself." " Help me." " Yes, there." "I'm so glad you came." "Estrellita!" "Miguel." "Go away, Maurice is coming back." "Who gave you these flowers?" "It's him!" "Maurice's back!" "Go away!" "Flowers?" "Can you make it?" "You brought her flowers?" "You brought flowers?" "Did you?" "You brought her flowers, asshole?" "You're gonna eat them." "Don't!" "Maurice, don't!" "Leave him alone!" "Asshole!" "Do you like it?" "Do you?" " I'll kill you!" " Don't, it wasn't him!" "Eat them up!" "Come on, eat them!" " I'll kill you!" " Don't!" "Let him be!" "I had to jump on them and separate them." "Without me, he'd have killed Miguel." "I wrecked his bike." " Frog!" "Frog!" " Don't touch my bike, idiot!" "Stop it!" "Come here." "Come here!" "Miguel was very grateful." "Ifit hadn't been for her, we'd have made up." "We both loved her." "Why the glasses?" "Is it the fucking Spanish shampoo again?" "The sun bothers me." "The sun in our caravan." "I'm lost." "I couldn't bear hurting you." "Fuck!" "Fuck passion!" "Fuck the Spanish sun, bullfights and paella!" "My tears used to turn you on." "Now, it's his voice." "Fuck flamenco!" "This country's too much!" " Where are you going?" " Out!" "To take Estrellita away, I needed my Dad's army." "His Roman legion." "But he hadn't forgiven me about the bra." "March!" "On the double!" "I couldn't count on him." "I'd have to make a pact with Miguel." "But he wouldn't listen and always said:" ""Let me be, Tete, I'm mad about her."" "He was a bore." "That pig had discovered she liked tears and never stopped crying." "IfI can't live with you, I'll kill myself." "Don't ever say that again." "You scare me." "She smelled his feet, that was final." "She was stunned." "I couldn't allow it." "Ifthe frog didn't react, I would." "I'd take her away from Miguel." "He was filling her." "I didn't dare come in." "Sing to me, sing." "Louder." "Louder, louder." "Sing to me, sing." "Louder, louder!" "Sing!" "Sing!" "Shit." "Damn "xarnego"." "What with his tears, his stinking feet and his songs, she'd burst." "Suddenly, there was milk coming out of everywhere." "She had burst." "It was all his fault." "I had lost her breast." "Maurice is the only man for me." "I don't want to hurt him anymore." "It can't go on." "You must understand." "What's wrong?" "Everything's wet." "God!" "The mattress!" "The frog came back and I ran." "Hi." "Don't be scared." "Go on home." "I didn't have the balls to go inside or to fight him." "My Dad was right." "I don't have balls." "She was so sad." "She felt bad about what she had done." "Forgive me." "Why?" "For having let you do what you wanted." "Fuck freedom." "I'd prefer you to beat me and to take me away from here." "It was a bad dream." "Say you love me." "I love you." "But I can't forgive you about the bed." "It cost over 10,000 francs in Carcassonne." "Where will we sleep tonight?" "I want you to do your show tonight." "For me, just for me." "Who's my muse?" "Me!" "Who inspires my most wonderful farts?" "Me!" "Who lights the wind?" "Me!" "Who makes the canon go off?" "Me!" "I'll never leave you." "I'll never leave you." "I love you." "I love you." "I'll give you everything." "The moon." " Flowers..." " A new mattress?" "Filled with our tears." "A bed of tears." "She was empty." "She had no milk left." "She couldn't stop crying." "They loved each other." "The frog sure was lucky." "IfI wanted her breast, I'd have to deal with him." "I never loved, never loved as much, I can swear it." "If you ever left, left without me, if you left forever, I know I would die, I'd die of love, of love, my love." "They left without a word." "She gave Wally back to me." "She left Miguel her panties." "I didn't understand why the moon had taken Estrellita away." "It was over." "She was empty and they had left." "Miguel felt bad too." "He kept on saying he couldn't live without her." "He tried to kill himself but, luckily, as Stallone used to say, the Mediterranean was a sea for kids." "He didn't make it." "Be a man!" "Hang in there don't look down!" "Get on, show some balls!" "Level five, open up!" "Come on, Tete, it's real easy!" "Tete, get up there!" "Come on, Tete, that's it!" "It's yours!" "Don't look down!" "Look upwards!" "Don't stop!" "Don't stop, Tete!" "Don't stop now!" "Come on, Tete!" "Excuse me, sorry." "Don't stop, Tete!" "Get up there!" "Don't look down!" "Look up!" "Come on, come on!" "You're nearly there!" "Suddenly, I saw her at my father's side." "Miguel saw her too." "He was terribly happy." "I had made it." "I felt I could reach the moon." "She gave me milk." "Her breasts were fuller than ever." "It was wonderful." "So good, so sweet." "But best of all, my mother came." "She too gave me milk." "She told me I'd always be able to drink it." "It was better than Estrellita's." "They fought to breastfeed me." "It was the happiest day in my life." "My Dad now says his son has more balls than a bull." "Before, I had none." "Now, I'm a bull." "For Miguel, it was also the happiest day in his life." "Estrellita took him away." "Having known her was wonderful." "Now she was happy." "The frog loved her and Miguel filled her." "It is my pleasure to introduce Estrellita, the Queen of Stuttgart!" "Fartman Maurice, the Fire King!" "Miguel, a Southern angel and his sparkling voice!" "The Turn of the Century Trio!" "I preferred to stay with my Mom." "By the way, my parents were right." "I was cutting a tooth and had to go to the dentist."