"I can't believe that I'm actually here and I'm gonna see them in the flesh because, like, Dujour is, like, my most favourite band of all time!" "I just wanna touch them!" "I don't care which one!" "I don't care where!" "I got all of the trading cards, and all their CDs and all my gear's from their clothing line, Dujour Couture." "I mean, I straight up love 'em." "We're, you know, like brothers." "Oh, my God!" "They're here!" "They're here!" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "They say this kind of love is wrong, but you know it feels so right" "?" "Running my hands across your cheeks, they're, oh, so smooth and white" "?" "Leave the light on, baby, and unlock your back door" "?" "I'm comin' through that way tonight to love you for sure" "?" "Lyin' on your bed, staring' up at the moon" "?" "You got me crazy, gotta love you soon" "?" "I'm your backdoor lover" "?" "Comin' from behind with the lights down low" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Just you and me, no one has to know" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Gonna meet you there at the secret spot" "?" "I'll show you a love that's more than hot" "We are here exclusive on the tarmac as Dujour heads off on their world tour." "A year ago, would you have ever imagined number one song and video?" "We're number one, comin' to you!" "Marco, I gotta tell you, there's a lady up there in a wedding dress." " Keep buying' the records, baby!" " Can you send it back to the studio?" "(they hum the "Entertainment Tonight" theme tune)" "?" "I'm your backdoor lover" "?" "Comin' from behind with the lights down low" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Just you and me, no one has to know" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Gonna meet you there at the secret spot" "?" "I'll show you a love that's more than hot" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Comin' from behind with the lights down low" "?" "Backdoor lover" "All right." "We land in Riverdale in half an hour." "Then on to the Riverdale Rise and Shine show." "Afternoon in store, gig at eight." "Questions?" "Yo, Wyatt." "My limited-edition Coke can has me with a goatee." "Everybody knows I shaved for the "Don't Tell Your Papa" video." "This is wiggedy-wack, Wyatt." "What's wiggedy-wack is your damn monkey." " Oh, here we go with the monkey again." " Yes, here we go again." "First it pooed on my incense." "Then it decided to poo on my two little balls and on my picture of Swami Muktananda." "Tell this man that Dujour means hygiene." "Maybe if you showed Dr Zaius respect, Dr Zaius will stop showing you the poo!" " Gentlemen..." " I'll kill you!" "I will rip out your heart!" " Whoa!" "You didn't touch it." " Eye contact." "Hand." "Eye contact." "Hand." "We'll talk to Coke about the cans." "And try and clean up after the doctor." "OK?" "OK?" " Yo, man, I'm sorry." "My bad." " It's all good." "Wyatt, could you maybe talk to Marco about him always doin' my face?" "You remember in the "What" video, I established the... face?" "Ever since, every time you see Marco, he's doing the... face." "And it's mine." "You look at him on TRL. "Hi, Carson."" "On the Kids' Choice Awards." ""This is ours?" "Thanks."" "Right here on the cover of Seventeen." ""Hi, little girl." "Beauty secrets?"" "It's my face." "It's my face." "Hey, Travis, am I doin' your face?" "Cos God forbid I do your face." "Cos it's such a good face." " Boys, boys, boys." " It's my face!" "It's my face!" " Dujour means friendship." " Thank you, Les." "Now listen." "(Travis sobs)" "Let's all take a moment." "When we land, I will call the choreographer and she will give you a new face." " Mama couldn't give you a good face." " Take that back right now!" " I'm sorry, Travis." " Thank you." " You can have a new face too." " Dujour means family." "Dujour means teamwork." "Teamwork." "So, how are we?" "Are we good?" "Are we happy?" "Are we dope?" " Word." " Wicked." "Yo, Wyatt?" "Wyatt, there was one more thing." "Yes?" "Well, we were, like, working on some remixes of the last single, right?" "And... we heard, like, a really strange background track and we were wonderin' whether or not you knew what it was all about." "Gee." "You know, I've no idea what that was." " Where did it come from?" " I mean, we just want some answers." "The answers I will provide." "I'll be right back." "Take the Chevy to the levee." "Whoa!" "Hey, that guy in the parachute looks just like Wyatt." "Oh, yeah?" "Does he look like this, or like this?" "Dujour means seat belts!" "Dujour means crash positions!" "Looks like we need to find a new band." "?" "I'm a punk rock prom queen" "?" "Brown paper magazine" "?" "Hotter than you've ever seen" "?" "Everywhere and in between" "?" "I'm a ten-ticket thrill ride" "?" "Don't you wanna come inside?" "?" "A five-star triple threat, hardest of the hard to get" "?" "No one's little red Corvette, ain't seen nothin' like it yet" "?" "It took six whole hours" "?" "And five long days" "?" "For all your lies to come undone" "?" "And those three small words were way too late" "?" "Cos you can't see that I'm the one" "?" "I'm your late-night head rush" "?" "Ace-high royal flush" "?" "Red velvet orange crush" "?" "You just don't impress me much" "?" "A glossy double-cover spread" "?" "Opened up inside your head" "?" "A black cherry paradise, half the sugar, twice the spice," "?" "I don't wanna treat you nice, come on, baby, roll the dice" "?" "It took six whole hours" "?" "And five long days" "?" "For all your lies to come undone" "?" "And those three small words were way too late" "?" "Can't you see that I'm the one?" "?" "It took six whole hours and five long days" "?" "For all your lies to come undone" "?" "And those three small words" "?" "Were way too late" "?" "Cos you can't see that I'm the one" "?" "It took six whole hours and five long days" "?" "For all your lies to come undone" "?" "And those three small words were way too late" "?" "Cos you can't see that I'm the one" "Thank you!" "Thank you, guys." "Real nice!" "Real nice!" "Thanks for coming out." "You're a great crowd." "(PA) OK, girls." "We need the lane now." "And your shoes." " So how did we do?" " $20." "Minus $5 shoe rental." "$15." "Each." "$5." "You know, all things considered, I'd say this was our best show yet." "We just need to build a following." "(? "Backdoor Lover" on car radio)" "Look!" "Skanky had a rock show and nobody came." "Did you guys all coordinate, or are you wearing the same thing by accident?" "At least we're not wearing stupid bunny ears." "They're not bunny, they're leopard." "And they're not stupid, they're special." " We're special." " Yeah special ed!" "Enjoy the gutters, Josie." "You'll be playing there for ever." "Hey..." "Hey, come on." "Who's a rock star?" " Who's a rock star?" " I am." "That's right." "There you go." "(? "Real Wild Child")" "Looking good, McCoy!" "Alan M. What's... what's goin' on?" "Uh..." "The, uh... truck died." "?" "Josie, did I bust the carburator?" "?" "Overload the alternator?" "Jump in any time." "?" "Abuse the accelerator?" "Nice!" "You can't drive this uphill when it's hot outside." "I told you." "You don't deserve a truck this good." "You totally take it for granted." "?" "Takin' my truck for granted" "?" "She says I'm takin' my truck for granted" "Um..." "Jos?" "Did, uh... did you ever wanna tell someone something but... you weren't sure if, uh... you should, you know?" " Yeah." " You know, cos you didn't know what their reaction might be, or... if it was the right thing to do?" "You should tell them." "You should always tell them." "Cos... cos there's this guy at work." "He just reeks, you know?" " A guy." " Yeah." " Smelly guy." " Oh, God, Josie." "No, not just smelly." "I'm talking like..." "like hot, wet garbage on a sunny day." "It's just..." "I think there's a problem, you know?" "It's like a stadium bathroom or something and no one seems to want to say anything." "I know you would say something, though, right?" "Yeah." "See, that's what I love about you." "We can just... we can just talk about stuff." " That's what I'm here for." " You know, that's so cool." "(Josie) Mm." "Good ramen." "I don't think people know how far one pack can go." "Honk, honk." "Who brought doughnuts?" "Don't think that this makes up for you missing our gig." "I'm sure we didn't miss much." "Nice management skills, brother." " Build yourself a nice fat girl group." " Hello, Alexandra." "Have you lost weight?" " Bite me, Bambi." " OK." "Alexandra?" " Why don't you go wait in the car?" " Make me, nose job." " Implants." " Penile." "Oh, I'm sorry." "That's the second time today, isn't it?" "So, ladies." "How'd our set go?" "You would know if you had been there." "I'm running a management company." "I can't be everywhere at once." "Oh, wouldn't that be cool, though, if you could?" "I could be here, and in there." "And I could be in the living room and in the family room, and over here..." "Alexander, you don't have any other clients." "Where else do you need to be?" "On the streets, spreading the gospel of the Pussycats." "I'm out there working my butt off for you guys." "I'm handing out fliers, I'm working the masses..." "Waiting in line for Dujour tickets." "It's for business." "I..." "Uh..." "Checking out the competition." "I don't like Dujour." "It's..." "Dujour." "And I could be back in this room, and I could go in the closet." "Hello?" "Uh-huh." "Oh, you want a demo tape of the Pussycats?" " Your phone didn't even ring." " It's on vibrate." "Um, so... so, yeah." "I gotta go right now." "You want it right now?" "OK." "Yeah." "I'll see you guys later." "All right, I'm on it." "You guys know he's lying." "You know your fly is open?" "You know, you... suck!" "That's perfect!" "Even our manager wants to see another band." "You guys?" "Come here, quick." "Hi, I'm Serena Altschul with MTV News." "We have just received a confirmed report that pop sensation Dujour disappeared in their private jet today, 40 miles east of the town of Riverdale." "Authorities are still trying to determine the whereabouts of the plane." "MegaRecords has yet to release a statement but has released a commemorative box set, complete with a history of Dujour in stores tomorrow." " Those poor boys." "...in what seems to be yet another rock'n'roll tragedy." "But they didn't say they were dead." "They said they were missing." "I say we raise money for a search party, and we hold a bake sale!" "Yes!" "Man, that is so sad." "It can all be over in a flash." "I know." "But at least they had a record deal." "We can have a record deal." "It's just that we can't sit around here waiting for it to happen." "We have to make it happen!" "And you know what?" "Life..." "life is short, and we... we are musicians." "And that means that we should be out there playing music." "We do play." "And we rock." "But nobody shows." "Nobody cares." "I care." "And you know what?" "When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade!" " And when the going gets tough..." " The tough make lemonade!" " Right." " Good." "We're all on the same page." "Pack up your bass." "This way!" "?" "The best things in life are free" "?" "But you can keep them for the birds and bees" " ?" "Give me money - ?" "That's what I want" " ?" "That's what I want - ?" "That's what I want" "?" "That's what I want, yeah" "?" "That's what I want" " ?" "Give me money - ?" "That's what I want" " ?" "Lots of money - ?" "That's what I want" " I live for these pink shoes." " Yeah." " So much cooler than our red shoes." " You guys!" "Pink is the new red." "Wyatt Frame." "I'm with the label." "I'm scouting for new talent and I wondered if there was anyone worth hearing." "I saw the card, but I missed everything else." " Start over while I change songs." " No, wait." "Play this." "It's the new single from Dujour." "Recorded just a few days ago, before the... disappearance." "I'd really like to test the reaction." "Right on." "Check this out, y'all!" "I got the world première of the last single ever from the late, great Dujour." "Just for all you right here in the store." "Check this out." "?" "Nobody rocks the mike like Dujour" "?" "Ride on a motorbike with Dujour" "?" "Kickin' it in a Benz with Dujour" " This is the best!" "I love this song!" " Oh, it's their best ever!" " If I don't buy it, everybody will hate me!" " Totally!" "And I also want orange shoes." "Yeah!" "Orange shoes are so much cooler than stupid pink shoes." "You guys!" "Orange is the new pink!" "I am sick of my Reebok sweats." "I need some..." "Puma sweats." "And I gotta buy a six-pack of Zima." " Dude, you don't drink." " I think I should start." "Yes, I think they responded to that very well, actually." "I think that song sucks." "I plug my ears when crap like that comes on." "Really?" "Well, everybody else seemed to like it." "Because they're mindless drones who will gobble up anything you tell them is cool." "I see." "Wow!" "You're a real freethinker, aren't you?" "I'd love to talk to you some more." "People in the recording industry, like me want to hear the opinion of individuals like yourself." "Find out what we're doing wrong, you know." "Yeah, right!" "How much time do you have?" "As much as you want." "After you." "Smells like Teen Spirit." "Well, this must be my lucky day." "A real nonconformist." "I'm so interested to hear what else you have to say." "First of all, I don't understand what..." "Gosh, that's fascinating." "(phone rings)" " Frame." " I'm waiting." "I'm onto it, Fiona." "You wouldn't believe this place." "It's a cultural wasteland." "Stop making excuses and get your ass back here with a band!" "Tomorrow." "I'll have a new band for you in the morning, I swear." "Then you'll still have a job... maybe." "OK, girls." "This is it." "Pussycats... unplugged." "Let's hear it." "One, two." "One, two, three!" "Whoa, whoa!" "What do you think you're doing?" "You can't play here." "I've got things to sell." "They're new." "They're orange." " So?" " So, look at you." "You're..." "With the..." "Who's gonna come into my store with you outside?" "The last I checked, this was a free country." "Well, the last I checked, I was calling the cops." ""Get your ass back here with a band."" "I'd like to see her move her ass once." "Just once." "Like he's really gonna call the cops." "(siren)" "Run!" "This is impossible!" "Where the hell am I supposed to find a...?" "(radio)?" "Though it's cold and lonely in the deep dark night" "?" "I can see paradise by the dashboard light" "?" "Though it's cold and lonely in the deep dark night" "Hello, ladies." "Wyatt Frame, MegaRecords." "Girls, I can't tell you how happy I am to be sitting at this table with the Pussyhats." "Pussycats." "Yes, of course." "That would explain why you're not wearing any." "Hats." "OK." "I speak on behalf of everyone at the label when I say that we'd love for you to sign with..." "MegaRecords." " Whoa!" "Wait!" "Whoa!" "Don't sign anything." " Who is this?" "Alexander Cabot III." "The Pussycats' manager." "Really?" "In that case you'll be entitled to 15 per cent of everything they make." "I'm his sister, Alexandra." "Love the accent." "(mimics accent) I used to summer on the Continent." "Fancy a snog?" " Fancy a mint?" " Wait a minute." "You... want to sign us?" " I mean, you've never even heard us play." " Oh!" "Oh, oh." "I'm sorry." "I thought you were a rock band that wanted to sign with a major label." " My bad." " No, no, no!" "Wait!" "No." "No, it's..." "I just didn't know it could happen this fast." "Well, that's the music biz for you." "If you wait for it to slow down it might pass you by - look what happened to the Beastie Boys." "But they're huge stars." "I know." "Excuse me." "I have to..." " Bathroom?" " Yeah." "Me, too." " I went before we left." " Good for you." "You should always try to go to the bathroom, even if you don't have to..." "OK, this is crazy." " Gotta gloss." " It won't hide the moustache." "Honk, honk." "If you're having a band meeting, I should be here." " It's a ladies' room!" " Nothin' I haven't seen before." " Does anyone have change for a tampon?" " I'll be outside." "Does anyone else think this is a little off?" " Like what?" " Well, like that Wyatt guy, for one." "Yeah." "He ordered a triple cappuccino and scooped off all the foam." "Why not get an espresso?" "He kept folding his napkin like he's afraid he doesn't have any friends." "Just people who wanna use him because he's just a big music guy." "Yeah..." "But I was talking more about the whole record contract thing." " I mean, it is super sudden." " It is." "But you said we had to go out and make things happen for ourselves." "And we did!" "I know." "I just think maybe we should think about this for a second." "Yeah!" "Gee, Josie, how exciting for you." "You'll get to go away and make a record and poor Alan M will have to stay behind in Riverdale, all alone, with me." "I cannot believe that they let you bring me to the city with you." " Sh." " What?" "I had to tell them that, uh, you're my guitar tech, so..." "You know what?" "I still don't understand why you're here." " I'm here cos I was in the comic book." " What?" "Nothing." "Whoa!" "Whassup, big butt?" " Shut up!" " Hey, you guys." "You know how people always say that this is the life?" "I think this is when they say it." " Private plane." " Record deal." " Coasters." " Loads of cash." "Well, scratch that." "We still poor." "What?" "Pardon?" "Hang on." "Yes?" "At least I don't think I need this any more." "The Riverdale muni bus pass." "Guys, you know what?" "We have the only bus passes in muni history with three people in the picture." "It's not my fault you both jumped in on mine." "No, you both jumped in on mine." "You know what, though?" "We should keep these." "Remind us where we came from." "Hey, listen." "Let's promise each other something right here and right now, OK?" "No matter what happens, if we become huge stars or if we end up hitchhiking back to Riverdale we will always be friends first, and a band second." " Friends first." " Friends first." " I swear on my bus pass?" " I swear on my bus pass." "Whoa, whoa." "Don't worry, Lex." "We're not going to have any trouble with these girls." "Oh, no." "?" "Well, I feel good, yeah, I feel fine" "?" "I've stopped complaining all the time" "?" "You'll get yours and, baby, I'll get mine, yeah" "?" "So don't be fooled by what you see" "?" "In movies, magazines and on TV" "?" "Cos what do they know about you and me?" "?" "We don't care what they say" "?" "We'll be all right, we'll be OK" "?" "Yeah, yeah" "?" "Yeah, yeah" "?" "So stand up straight and stand up tall" "?" "Ain't got to waste your time in shopping malls" "?" "Slam the door and let's tear down the walls" "?" "Crank it up, let's mess around" "?" "Be who you are cos you're the star" " ?" "Yeah, yeah - ?" "You are the star" "?" "Yeah, yeah" "Jeez, it's so huge." "Oh, this is only the beginning." "Are you sure you should be putting that up already?" "I mean, we haven't even recorded anything yet." "What if you don't like it?" " What if nobody likes it?" " Oh, don't worry." "If you screw up, we'll just put somebody else up there." "Hey, Wyatt." "They got our name wrong." "We're not Josie and the Pussycats." " We're just the Pussycats." " Oh." "No." "Josie's the singer." "The public needs someone out front to identify with." "Trust me." "Bands that have the word "and" in the title sell twice as many records as those that don't." "What about the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Backstreet Boys...?" "Yes, well, if you want to split hairs, yes, of course." "Obviously." "Yes, yes!" "But I..." "Come on!" "Would you be more interested in a band called the Pussycats or are you more likely to buy a CD, or read a comic, or watch a cartoon or go and see a movie about a trio of luscious ladies called Josie and the Pussycats?" "Hm?" " It does have a nice ring to it." " Oh, yes." "Hey!" "Oh, so sorry, Valerie." "I'd no idea you weren't in here." "Come on." "(Melody) More coasters!" "What did I tell you, Fiona?" "Just think Christina Aguilera times three." "Except one of them's incredibly tan." "Or else TLC with two white chicks." "Or, um..." "Hole." "Wyatt, I get it without the stupid analogies." "Put 'em in the studio and we'll talk later." "The Feds are here with some foreigners." " Fiona, you won't be disappointed." " I'd better not be." "We can't afford another Dujour disaster." "Welcome." "I'm sure you're wondering why Agent Kelly and the US government would be so interested in what appears to be a record company." "Well, I'm about to show you why." "This is what our operation really does." "(PA) Blue is the new orange." "This is where it starts-the fads, the fashions, the product placement." "From here we control the most influential demographic of the entire population." "We decide everything, from what clothes are in style to what slang is in vogue." "Feathered tank tops, matching pants, kind of a Buffy meets Chicken Run." " Feathers are the new rhinestones." " "Cool" will be "jerkin"'." " As in "Dude, that's jerkin'."" " That's dirty." "(Fiona) This is the epicentre of all trends." "We turn your world into one giant TV commercial." "But how, you may ask, can our operation be so effective?" "Sure, these kids have brains like Play-Doh just waiting to be moulded into shape." "But... but something else must be going on, right?" "The Chinese guy knows what I'm talking about." "To answer some of your questions, we've produced a short educational film." "Lights!" "Hello." "I'm Eugene Levy, and yes..." "I'm an actor." "No, I said cappuccino." "I'm here to talk to you about something very important." "No, it's not about me or my career." "I'm here to talk about subliminal messages in rock'n'roll music." "Or, as it's simply known in some cultures, rock music." "You see, for years the government has been wisely coercing teenagers to buy products they normally wouldn't want, just to get their money." "Fact: kids don't have bills to pay." "Fact: they don't pay taxes." "But they do baby-sit and hold minimum-wage jobs that earn them wads of cash as thick as... well, my body of work." "But these kids today aren't dumb." "They're not gonna buy just anything." "That's why the government has been planting subliminal suggestions in today's rock music." "The results?" "We can now get these kids to buy just about anything." "We can have them chasing a new trend every week." "And that is good for the economy." "And what's good for the economy is good for the country." "So God bless the United States of America the most ass-kickin' country in the world." "But how can you control the rock bands?" "What if they find out about the hidden messages in their music?" "Ever wonder why so many rock stars die in plane crashes?" "Overdose on drugs?" "We've been doing this a long time." "If they start to get too curious, our options are endless!" "Bankruptcy!" "Scandals!" "Religious conversions!" "We've created a highly rated TV show just to explain what happens to these people." "(translation) I loved the one on Leif Garrett." "Wow." "The walls are mushy!" "We brought some equipment in." "I assume it's to your liking." "They're brand-new." "I like this." "It's got shiny knobs." "No!" "No, no, no." "No, no, no, no, no, no, no." "No, no, no, no, no." "That we do not touch." "It's only the most expensive piece of equipment in the studio." "The megasound 8000." "Although the name sounds ominous, it's actually just a high-tech processor." " How does it work?" " Why do you need to know that?" "What, is it a big secret or something?" "Wyatt's got a secret!" "Wyatt's got a secret!" "No, I don't." "It's not a secret." "Stop it!" "I'll tell you." "I'll show you." "Play a little something for me, would you?" "?" "It took six whole hours and five long days" "?" "For all your lies to come undone" "?" "And those three small words were way too late" "?" "Cos you can't see that I'm the one" "Perfect!" "Now, this'll just take a moment." "And now, I'll play it back with the megasound." "?" "Those three small words were way too late" "Is that us?" "It sounds so..." " I want a Big Mac." " What?" " Mel, you're a vegetarian." " I know, but suddenly I want one." " Maybe on the way back to the hotel?" " OK." "As long as we can stop by a Foot Locker." "I'm dying for a pair of old school Tretorns." "Jerkin'!" "Tretorns are the new Adidas!" "Ladies." "Now, should I drop you back at Riverdale mall?" "Or are you ready to make a record?" "Come on!" "One, two." "One, two, three!" "?" "Well, he looks at me with those innocent eyes" "?" "And says "It looks like you're wearin' some kinda disguise" "?" "Because your hair sticks up, your shoes are untied."" "? "I hope that you got that shirt at half price."" "?" "And every word I say falls flat on the floor" "?" "I try to tell a joke, he's heard it before" "?" "And I don't think that I can take it no more" "?" "He's driving me right out my front door" "?" "Why do you do what you do to me, baby?" "?" "You're shaking my confidence, driving me crazy" "?" "You know if I could I'd do anything for you" "?" "Please don't ignore me cos you know I adore you" "?" "Can't you just pretend to be nice?" "?" "Can you at least pretend to be nice?" "?" "If you could just pretend to be nice" "?" "Well, everything in my life would be all right" " This is the best CD ever!" " Yeah." " I want some Gatorade." " Gatorade is the new Snapple." "?" "And I try so hard just to figure him out" "?" "But he won't tell me what he's been thinking about" "?" "And then he falls asleep on the living room couch" "?" "With his sunglasses on and his tongue hanging out" "?" "Then he disappears for a week at a time" "?" "And then he shows up just like everything's fine" "?" "I don't get what goes on in his mind" "?" "But I'm tired of hearing the same stupid lines" "?" "Why do you do what you do to me, baby?" "?" "You're shaking my confidence, driving me crazy" "?" "You know if I could I'd do anything for you" "?" "Please don't ignore me cos you know I adore you" "?" "Can't you just pretend to be nice?" "?" "Can you at least pretend to be nice?" "?" "If you could just pretend to be nice" "?" "Well, everything in my life would be all right" "?" "Well, everything in my life would be all right, all right" "?" "Well, everything in my life would be all right, all right" "This must be a misprint." "Wait!" "Does anyone else think it's a little strange that all this happened in a week?" "No!" "Who are you?" "We know them!" " Yeah, we do." " Oh, my God!" "We love you." "We're, like, your biggest fans!" "No, you're not." "You hate us." "Josie and the Pussycats are our new all-time favourite band of all time!" "Josie and the Pussycats are the new Dujour!" "Wanna see our Pussycat tattoos?" "Oh!" "That was way too weird." "Weird?" "What's the point of being famous if the people you hated at high school don't want to kiss your ass?" "You're lucky." "Most people wait till their ten-year reunion for that sort of revenge." "You have to get used to people throwing themselves at you." "Talking of throwing Fiona, the head of MegaRecords, is throwing a huge party in your honour." "A celebration of all things Josie." " Um..." "Wyatt?" " Mm?" " Don't I get one?" " Oh..." "That is strange." "Well, come along too." "There's always room for one more." " How about us?" " No!" "Wow, a... party." "That's, um..." "That's, uh..." " That's kinda cool." " But is it as "kinda cool" as playing your own stadium concert?" "Oops!" "I promised Fiona she could tell you." "Damn." " We're playing a stadium concert?" " This weekend." "Shouldn't we maybe play some small clubs first?" "Maybe do a few gigs in Europe?" "Build a following?" "You have a following." "Honestly, J." "I wouldn't send you out there if I didn't think you could deliver." "But this is the whole deal." "Simultaneous pay-per-view webcast." "Millions of little people paying good money just to watch you." "Well, I'm sure your band mates are très excited." "Right, Mel?" " Our first concert ever!" "Thanks, Wyatt!" " Oh, don't thank me." "Thank Fiona." "It was her idea." "It's been part of her plan for you guys from the start." "Operation Big Concert." "Where we finally take things to the next level." "When Josie and the Pussycats play all the kids in the audience, as well as the ones watching at home will have to purchase these." "It's the debut of 3-D-X surround sound a new technology that makes the music feel like it's happening all around you." "Like 3-D." "Gentlemen, a demonstration." " This is what those kids think they hear." " (? "Pretend to Be Nice")" "And this is what they're really hearing." "(man) Conform." "Free will is overrated." "Jump on the bandwagon." " That voice." "I know that voice." "It's..." " It's Mr Moviefone." " Yes!" " He does all our subliminal tracks." "There is no such place as Area 51." "Excellent work, Fiona." "These kids'll never know what hit 'em." " And neither will you." " I'm sorry." "What was that?" " Huh?" "What?" " You just said something." " No, I didn't." " Yes, you did." " No, I didn't." " Yes, you did." "I said "These kids'll never know what hit 'em", and you said "Neither will you."" " I did?" " We all heard you." "Oh..." "Well..." "What I... meant to say was "And neither will you guys."" "Meaning the teenagers?" "I was just emphasising my point." "Oh." "Oh, OK." "Great." "Thanks." " That was close." " Excuse me?" "I was going to say..." ""That was close to being a really nice moment between the two of us, don't you think?"" "Yeah, well, I guess." "I have to be getting back to the Pentagon, so..." "Toni Tennille and I, we..." "we wrote all the songs together." "The Captain just played the piano." "Yeah, it was... it was my idea to have him... have him wear that hat." "I said "How you gonna be a captain if you don't wear a hat?" (chuckles)" "We did make some beautiful music together, though." "Big song, the one I was mostly responsible for was that "Love Will Keep Us Together"." "But guess what." "It didn't." "Guess after a while, you know, they didn't wanna share the spotlight no more." "Sometimes that stuff happens." "I can still remember, though, the Captain always said "Friends first, the band second. "" "I wish I hadda got that in writin'." "?" "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands" "?" "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands" "?" "If you're happy and you know it and you really wanna show it" "?" "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands" "(screams)" "That's better." " (knocking) - ?" "It's the guy with the pizza." "?" "The kind that's good to eat-za" " ?" "If you open the door" " Oh, my God." "I am so sorry." "I totally, totally forgot." "We have to go to this record party thing with the head of the label." " What's the matter?" " Nothing." "I just, uh..." " You look so, uh..." " They sent this dress over." "I did not pick it out." "But I cut out the front and I made wristbands, though." " It looks stupid, doesn't it?" " No, no, no." "No, I..." "I've just..." "I've never seen you..." "Wow!" "Finish your sentences." "Is that a good "wow" or a bad "wow"?" "Oh, no, no." "It's, uh... it's a good "wow"." "It's, uh... it's a very good "wow"." "Thanks." " Actually, would you mind?" "There's a..." " Mind... what?" "There's a chain thing that I can't figure out really." "Oh." "Right." "Right." "Um..." "OK." "Um..." "It's, um... it's down here." "A little complicated. (clears throat)" "Josie, are you ready?" "The door was open." "I hope I'm not interrupting anything..." " Hey, Alec N, how's it hanging?" " No, actually, it's Alan M." "What's with the initial?" "It didn't work for Sheila E, it doesn't work for you." "Come on, Josie." "We don't want to be late for the most exclusive party of the year." "There's free cable." "Um, Josie." "Um, I was wondering, did you wanna do something tomorrow?" " Yeah." " When?" " Two?" " No can do." "Taping E/." " Oh. 1.30." " MTV." " Three." " MSNBC." " Four." " 4.15." " 4.15." " Sold to the young man with no future." "Come on, Josie." "There's a limo waiting." "Good night, Adam 12." "Trot on." "Come on." "Actually, it's Alan M." "(? "Pretend to Be Nice")" "(Josie) Look at them staring at us." "No one thinks I should be here." "That's totally what they're thinking." "Look at them staring at Josie." "No one thinks I should be here." "That's totally what they're thinking." "?" "If you're happy and you know it and you really wanna show it" "?" "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands" "(MC) Ladies and gentlemen, the head of MegaRecords, the host of your party Fiona" "(Fiona)?" "Why do you do what you do to me, baby?" "Isn't she fabulous?" "?" "You know if I could I'd do anything for you" "?" "Please don't ignore me cos you know I adore you" "I'm Fiona." "Welcome to your party!" "Enough spectacle." "Let's go be girls!" "This is my girlie room." "No boys allowed." "Come on, girls." "Sit down." "We'll gossip." "Isn't he just the cutest?" "He is pretty cute." "Pringles!" "Josie!" "Oh, I am starved." "I'm such a pig." "No." "No, you're not." "So, Josie, how much do you weigh?" " Excuse me?" " Your weight." " 118." " Ha!" "115." "I'm three pounds lighter than you." "But don't worry about it." "I think you look great." "(lisping) So pretty and popular." "What did you just say?" "I said the new song's pretty popular." " What thong?" " The new song." "The new single." "I'm sorry." "I have something caught in my teeth." "(Fiona clears throat)" "Got it!" "So who wants to French braid?" "OK, so who else thinks that Fiona's a freak?" "God, I'm so glad you said something because as soon as you said her name, I got the most awful sensation." "Like this ice-cold chill creeping up my spine." "Oh, sweetie, that's cos you're sitting on the O." "Oh!" "No." "I still got the shivers, you guys." "It's not the O. It's her." "I don't know." "What do you think, Val?" "Well, stuff's definitely been..." "different since we left Riverdale." "And if you ask me, some things feel like they've changed completely." "Wyatt?" "I don't like those two Pussycats." "They're asking questions, and that's dangerous." " We can't afford to take risks." " I'll get rid of them have a new band by the morning." "Think, Wyatt!" "We've already sold half a million Josie ears for Big Concert." "Right." "Yes." "So we have." " So what are you suggesting?" " Keep Josie and put those two nosy little Pussycats to sleep." "I don't think Josie will play without her friends." "Oh?" "I think we might persuade her." ""Next on Behind the Music Josie suffers a tragic loss."" "(chuckles evilly)" "The city aquarium holds more than 244 varieties of sea life." "Oh, Josie, did I tell you, uh, I got a gig tonight?" " You did?" "That's great." " Yeah, well, it's just this bar but the manager, I played him my demo, and he said I could have a full half-hour." "So, do you think maybe you wanna come, or...?" " Yeah." " Cos I know you're busy and everything." "Oh, my God!" "Is that Josie?" "Thanks." "Yeah, no problem." "How am I gonna pull this off?" "What?" "I'm a girl from Riverdale, you know?" "I'm..." "I'm not a rock star." "Jos, you've been dreaming about this your whole life." "I know." "It's just..." "What?" "I'm scared." "Don't be." "You gotta believe in yourself." "What if I can't?" "Then then I guess I'll just have to believe in you for you." "(knocking)" "Oh, wow." "So what do you think we should open with for the concert?" ""Spin Around", or maybe, uh, "Come On"?" "Huh?" "Oh, I don't know." "We could try "Roll on Rollie Wheel" but honestly, I think the lyrics still need some work." "What do you think?" "It's... your call." "I mean, you're the boss." "No, I'm not." "Val, what's with you?" "Hello, girls!" "And how are the most beautiful, talented women in rock'n'roll?" " Don't you mean "woman"?" " Valerie, my darling." "Learn to take a compliment." "What are you going to do tonight when you go on TRL and Carson Daly tells you how much he loves your music?" " Don't you mean what's Josie gonna do?" " No." "She won't be there." "We booked you and Melody." "It's time the world got to know the other Pussycats." "We're gonna be on TRL?" "Do I get to touch Carson?" "Anywhere you like." "The taping's in two hours." "Unless, of course, you have a problem with this." "Do you have a problem with this?" "No!" "I think you guys will have a great time." "I love that show." "And... and you don't mind if Mel and I go without you?" "Why?" "I don't care about that stuff." "Jos!" "Oh, I'm so sorry." " I don't know what I was thinking." " OK." "Come on, girls!" "There are stylists and designers waiting in your room." "And you have some homework tonight." "This is the remix of your next single." " I'm very curious to hear your thoughts." " Could it wait until tomorrow?" "It's just that Alan M is playing his first gig tonight and I wanna get there early." "Oh." "Oh, I'm so sorry, Josie." "I forgot to tell you." "Alan M called my office earlier." "They cancelled his show." " They did?" " Yes." " Why didn't he call me here?" " Um..." "I'm sure he did." "In fact, if you go down to the front desk, there'll be a message waiting for you." "Excuse me." "Make sure there's a message from Alan M, OK?" "Bye." "Yes, there's a message waiting for you." "Now..." "I guess I should call him." "He also said that he won't be available for several hours and he'll call you when he can." " All that was on the message?" " Um... yes." "Excuse me." "Yes, that's all in the message." "Anything else?" "Who do you keep calling?" "I'm running a label here, Josephine." "I have other artists who need me." "Other artists who need my time." "Other artists who aren't so difficult about putting in a little bit of extra work." "Your level of noncommitment is making me doubt your commitment commitment!" "So you wanna be a rock superstar, eh?" "Live large, big house, five cars?" "Well, you have to do the time!" "Otherwise... somebody else will." "And you'll be left to explain it all to Mel and Val." "I am committed." "I am." "Yes, I hope so, my darling." "I hope so." " Val, we're on TRL" " Hey, check out the view." "It's fake." "Wow." "This stuff looks so different on TV." "All of this stuff is fake." "Where is everybody?" "Where's Carson?" "Yo, kitty kats!" "How you ladies doin'?" "I'm Carson Daly." "Welcome to the show." " You're not Carson Daly." " Of course I'm Carson Daly!" "Check the nails." "You need to call me." "I got plans." "All right." " Is everybody ready to start the show?" " Oh, my God!" "It's Carson!" "(mimicking) Oh, my God!" "It's Melody!" "You gotta stop trying to be me with the nails." "What you sayin'?" " A brother can't be Carson Daly?" " No." "That's not what I'm sayin'." "I am Carson Daly, so it doesn't work right now." "(as Carson) Who's gonna break my gazooms?" "That's pretty good." "Who else do you do?" "(as Mike Tyson) Mike Tyson." "I would take a bite..." "OK, what is going on?" "Are you...?" "Is this TRL or not?" "This is not Total Request Live." "It's more like Total Request Dead." "Yeah." "You see, ladies, we've only got one request today." "And that's to kill you." "Carson said he's gonna kill us." "Like that's the request." " All right, I got the blonde." " He's not kidding." "Go!" "(phone rings)" "?" "This is the place where I sit" "?" "This is the part where I love you too much" "?" "This is as hard as it gets" "Um..." "This, uh... this next song is, uh dedicated to, uh... a friend of mine." "I kinda wanted to wait till she showed up to play it, but I guess she..." "Um..." "The name of the song is, uh "Wish You Felt the Same"." "(toilet flushes)" "Hey." "Shut up, or hold it till you get home!" "Who do you want to kill you, huh?" "Eddie Murphy?" "(as Eddie Murphy) I want them Josie girls dead, all right?" "I want 'em dead!" "I can't believe you're a killer!" "You seem so nice on TV." "Really?" "You know, I always thought you were kinda hot." "Too bad!" "I always thought you were kinda hot, too." "You did?" "What's your sign?" " Scorpio." " I'm a Cancer." "(as Chris Rock) The Pussycats?" "The Pussycats?" "I gotta kill you." "Good Lord!" "What was that?" " Chris Rock." " That was a terrible Chris Rock." "Why do you even bother doing impressions?" "You're not funny." "(as Bill Cosby) You know who's funny?" "Bill Cosby." "And he's gonna kill you after sticking' my spoon in your pudding." "No way!" "My favourite movie is Lady and the Tramp." "When the dogs are eating spaghetti and share the same piece?" "(both) And their noses touch!" "You know, if I wasn't a key player in this whole conspiracy to brainwash the youth of America with pop music we could totally date." " You think?" " Oh, yeah." "Yeah, right!" "Like I'd ever go out with a guy like you!" "Now, you, on the other hand..." "Come on." "Let's get outta here and find Josie." "Bye." " (knocking) - (Val) Josie?" "Quick!" "Open the door!" "Josie?" "Jo..." " Josie!" "Josie, we have to talk to you." " How did they let the two of you in here?" "I specifically told the front desk no visitors." " Are you OK?" " Of course I'm OK." "Why wouldn't I be?" "I have the number one single in the country." "You two, on the other hand should maybe be a little worried." "Josie, Carson Daly tried to kill us tonight and I think it has something to do with our music." "Why do you call it..."our music"?" "Becau..." "Are you even listening?" "I am listening very carefully." "And do you know what I'm hearing?" "I'm hearing someone glomming onto my talent and my credit." ""Our music", Mel?" "I basically write all of it." "Josie, no, you don't." "We write it together." "Oh." "OK." "So, if we're all doing equal amounts of work why isn't the band called Valerie and the Pussycats?" "I knew it." "You've been thinking this the whole time." "I'm just..." "I'm just backup to you, huh?" "Oh, but you are good, solid backup." "Oh, hey, Val." "Who's a rock star?" "Who's a rock star?" "I am!" "Josie, don't do this." " We need to stick together now." " Oh, my God." "Melody's gonna cry." "What's the matter, snuggle bunny?" "Finally realising the world isn't all sunshine and rainbows?" " Stop it." " Not everyone gets a happy ending." " Stop it." " And do you wanna know what else?" "Puppies turn into dogs who get old... and die." "Someday you'll thank me." "Of course, by then I won't be taking your calls." "?" "This is the place where I sit" "?" "This is the part where I love you too much" "?" "This is as hard as it gets" "?" "Cos I'm getting tired of pretending I'm tough" "?" "I'm here if you want me, I'm yours, you can hold me" "?" "I'm empty and achin' and tumblin' and breakin'" "?" "Cos you don't see me" "?" "And you don't need me" "?" "And you don't love me" "?" "The way I wish you would" "?" "The way I know you could" "(Mr Moviefone) Val and Melody are mean, evil girls" "You should have a solo career" "You have the number one single in the country." "Val and Mel are trying to glom onto your talent and your credit." "If they're doing equal amounts of work why isn't the band called Valerie and the Pussycats?" "They're just dead weight, Josie" "You could be huge without them/ Madonna huge" "Val and Melody talk about you behind your back" "Melody thinks you can't sing/ Seriously." "She told me" "Dump them/ They are trying to destroy you, Josie" "You'll be better off without them" "Who's a rock star?" "You are" "A great big rock star" "A Mick Jagger-sized rock star" "Go, Josie/ Go/ Go/ Go" "Val!" " The return of the superstar!" " What's going on?" " And where are Mel and Val?" " Since when do you care?" "Oh, and we heard what you said, Bitchy McBitch." " Wish I'd said it." " They're gone, Josie." "They're gone." "And I hope you're happy." "No more band." "Just like the Beatles." "Like the Jackson Five." "Like A Flock of Seagulls." "These are so good." "You want one of these?" "OK, look." "I never thought I would say this to you." "Ever." "But please would you help?" "Now?" "!" "Wyatt gave me this CD of our song, and, like, as soon as I heard it..." " I don't know." " What, it sucked?" "There's something on here, I swear." "OK, OK." "You should have a solo career" "You could have your own prime-time TV series." "We could call it "Josie", and run it right after "Will and Grace"" "Oh, my God!" "That's Mr Moviefone!" "How did you get him to put that on there?" "You slept with him!" "What are you talking about?" "This is on our CD." "It's underneath the music." "Wyatt put them on there to brainwash me." "?" "Dom-dom-dom!" "Ooh!" "Brainwashing!" "Ooh, help!" "We're being brainwashed." "Diet Coke's the new Pepsi One." "MS..." "Main... main system." "Music... sequence?" " Maybe you broke it." " Whoa, I didn't touch it." "Josie and the Pussycats are the best band ever." "They are totally jerking'." "You must buy their CD." "You have to see them in concert." "You also have to buy Steve Madden shoes." "Heath Ledger is the new Matt Damon." "You're nobody without an Abercrombie  Fitch vintage tee." "They're selling stuff through our music." "Josie and the Pussycats are the best band ever" " They're selling us through our music." " That's the reason you're so popular." "I want a vintage tee... and Heath Ledger." "Oh, my God." "It's all my fault." "Everything." "People dressing alike, buying the same stuff." "I sold it to them." "I'm a trend pimp." "Well, it stops here!" "I'm no pimp!" "And I'm not going to let Wyatt and Fiona get away with this." "We are going to the police, and we are taking this with us!" "Are you guys gonna help me or what?" "Oh!" "I'll help!" "Yeah, right!" "Cos you know I'm just gonna let you walk right outta here and spoil everything." "Now the event everybody has been waiting for is finally here." "One night only, the worldwide live debut concert of Josie and the Pussycats." "It's going to be live at the MegaArena with a simultaneous global webcast." "And remember, you will not hear a thing without your Josie 3-D-X headphones so I urge you all to pick some up." "I know I bought two." "Oh." "Look at the pouty girl." "Boo-hoo!" "You'd better snap out of it, red." "You've got a show to put on." "Are you kidding?" "I'm not gonna play, help you send messages to those kids." "Look who's got all principled all of a sudden." "You didn't seem to mind when your song went to number one!" "You should kiss my cellulite-free ass for all I've done for you." "I made you a rock star." " Tell me you don't love that." " Look, I said forget it, all right?" "Now find yourself another girl." "Yeah, you see, I would but everybody's already here!" "Too bad." "Wyatt." " Josie!" " Val!" "Mel!" "Don't talk to her." "You're wasting your time." "Miss Diva here doesn't care if you do something to us." "No, that's not true." "Listen to me." "I didn't mean any of that stuff that I said before." "Fiona and Wyatt have put subliminal message tracks underneath our music." "Can it, rusty." "Your story's boring." "Wyatt, why don't you show these two lovely young ladies what we have for them this evening?" " Gladly, my darling." "A car!" "Val, I won a car!" " No, you didn't win a car." " Oh, my God!" "You won a car." "No one won a car!" "The car is about to be a part of history if you decide not to play tonight." "I'm Serena Altschul with MTV breaking news." "The Josie and the Pussycats concert was unexpectedly cancelled when an automobile exploded at the stadium." "The passengers were identified as Valerie Brown and Melody Valentine two founding members of the popular rock band." "Investigators were quoted as saying the two died a slow, fiery death inside the four-wheeled hell pit." "We're told that Josie will be releasing a statement to the press to comment on this tragedy." "Yes, what are your comments?" "We're all gagging to know." "Roast your friends?" "Or play the show?" "Play, or roast?" "What's it to be?" "All right!" "I'll play." "See, Val?" "She still likes us." "Mel, of course I do." "You guys are my best friends on the planet." "Look, I know friends don't treat each other the way I treated you guys." "But if I could just go back in time, I'd take it all back." "That'd be cool." "If I could go back in time..." "I'd wanna meet Snoopy." "Mel, I love that about you." "I love that you think that everything is possible and that this world is such a great place." "Because you know what?" "It is." "And I'm so sorry if, for one second, I made you think that it wasn't." "And, Val..." "Val!" "You bought me my first guitar." "We may have started this band together but the only reason that we've come this far is because of you." "I don't care if we're Josie and the Pussycats or Valerie and the Pussycats or whoever and the Pussycats." "It doesn't matter, as long as we're together." "You're my sister, Val." "I love you." "I love you too, Jos." "And I love you, Val." "And I love you, Mel." " And I love you, Josie." " And I..." "I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream." "Everyone loves everyone." "Now let's get the show started!" "(chanting) We want the show!" "We want the show!" "So what is it this time, Fiona?" "Cross-trainers?" "Pizza bagels?" "Lip gloss?" "Oh, it's bigger." "Much, much bigger." "You're gonna have a hard time selling secret messages once your secret's out." "Oh?" "And tell me, cookie, who will believe you?" "Who will get behind the ridiculous ramblings of one silly, powerless girl?" "We will." "Who the hell are you?" "Someone you thought you'd gotten rid of." "Oh, my God!" "It's Les from Dujour!" " Les?" " I tried to warn you." " The message on your mirror." " That was you?" " Dujour was in my bathroom!" " I love you, Les." " But you were killed in a plane crash." " That's what I thought." "Wyatt?" "Oh, well, we managed to land the plane just fine." "Unfortunately, it was in the parking lot of a Metallica show." "Well, the fans beat the crap out of us." "Well, you don't look too bad." "And I thank God every day I knew the words to "Enter Sandman"." "(muffled)" "Word, dog." "She's not gonna get away with it." "Not this time." "Let's get 'em, boys!" "Dujour-style!" "Anyway..." "Oh, now, come on!" "Boy, you almost got me." "Girls all over the world would kill to be in your shoes, and you run away from it." "Why?" "So you could go crawling back to Shitdale and spend the rest of your life being washed up with your loser friends Dopey and Mopey there?" "That's it." "Just stop right there, missy." "Wyatt, you messed with the wrong pussy." "You bitch!" "You want some?" "Come on, bring it!" "Stop it!" "No!" "Let go!" "Let go!" "Let go!" "Ooh!" "What are you gonna do?" "Kill me with the guitar?" "Who's gonna go up there and sing?" "You need me." "Remember?" "Need you?" "Doll..." "I created you." "And believe me, I can destroy you." "(feedback)" "I'm sorry." "Did you need that?" "Wyatt!" "Fix this!" "You!" "What's your job?" "Fix this!" "Oh, it's too late!" "They're already taking off the ears!" "Fiona is the most jerkin' girl in the world." "Everybody loves Fiona." "She's got the best hair and the most awesome clothes." "And she's so thin." "I know I want to be just like Fiona." "That's the secret message that you wanted to send out?" "That you're cool?" "What?" "That's not me, I swear." " (Fiona) You're not doing it right" " Hey/ That's my job" "(lisps) If I was a guy, I'd ask her out." "If I was a girl, I'd wanna be her best friend." " What's wrong with your voice?" " We'd have slumber parties we'd have tickle fights" "(lisps) Oh, sure." "Go ahead and laugh." "You don't know what it's like to be teased and ridiculed your whole life." ""She sells silver swans down by the seashore."" ""Seven silver..." "She swims se..."" "I tried, didn't I?" "All I ever wanted was to be popular." "Tell me, is that so bad?" "Lisa?" " What did you call me?" " Lisa Snider?" "(lisps) Lisping Lisa?" "That... that was my nickname in school." "Huntington High School." "Lisa, it's me." "Wally!" "White-ass Wally!" "White-ass Wally?" "The albino kid?" "That's impossible!" "First of all, he wasn't British." "(American accent) I'm not." "I started talking like that because I thought it would make me more attractive." "He was so pale." "Make-up." "I..." "I learned to speak without a lisp." "Look!" "Look!" "I can't believe it's you." "Isn't it the strangest coincidence?" "Wait." "Oh, I've been holding that in for the past 15 years." "This is so romantic." "Yeah, in a creepy, ironic sort of way." "So, what's the moral of the story here?" "Freaks should date other freaks?" "No, I think the moral of the story here is you should be happy with who you are." "Spending money on expensive clothes, trying to impress people?" "It never made me happy." "No, hap..." "Oh, my gosh." "Happiness is on the inside." "I'm..." "I'm not this." "I'm not what I wear!" "I'm not what I wear!" "You should think about this." "Oh, please!" "Unlike you bunch of wack jobs, I'm perfect just as I am." "Holy shit!" "That girl's got a skunk on her head!" "Oh." "Jeez." "That's just your hair." "Sorry." "But that's messed up." "Who are you?" " Agent Kelly." "I'm with the government." " Thank God!" "Did you know that Fiona and Wyatt are using that machine to send subliminal messages through our music?" "They're trying to create an army of mindless teenagers to make them buy things, and even control their thoughts." " They what?" "!" " Oh, come on." " You knew about this from the beginning." " Arrest that woman." " And that man." " What?" "!" "On charges of conspiracy against the youth of America." " You can't be serious." " Oh, I'm serious, ma'am." "This is a very serious offence." "Sorry, Fiona, but somebody's gotta take the fall." "You bastard!" "Besides, after the concert we were gonna shut down your entire operation anyway." "We've found that subliminal messages work much better in movies." "(Mr Moviefone) "Josie and the Pussycats" is the best movie ever." "All right, let's go." "Well, now that you girls are done saving the world I think you have a concert to play." "(Alexander) Give it up for Josie and the Pussycats" "Whoa..." "I'm gonna take these off." "Stop!" "I know you all came here because you heard something you liked on our CD." "We're gonna play something different for you, something you haven't heard." "It's cool if you like it, it's all right if you don't." "Just... decide for yourselves." "This is for someone who said he believed in me." "I kinda wish he was here now." "?" "Na-na na" "?" "Na na-na na" "?" "Na-na na" "?" "Na na-na na" "?" "Na-na na" "?" "Na-na na" "?" "Yeah" "One, two." "One, two, three!" "?" "Spin around, come back home, you're runnin' out on a line" "?" "Sometimes feel I'm goin' out of my mind" "?" "Stunned here, waitin' for anyone to take the time" "?" "Spin around, we get further and further away" "?" "Smile and wave, ain't got nothin' to say" "?" "Stunned here, waitin' for anyone to take the time" "?" "To change my mind this time" "?" "But I've been starin' at the sun for some time" "?" "It gets dark inside but I don't mind" "?" "And if you're gone it's like I'm goin' blind" "?" "I can't get by this time" "?" "Spin around, come down now cos it's all gettin' clear" "?" "Everything you've ever wanted is here" "?" "We never needed anyone to change our minds" "?" "Don't waste our time" "?" "We're fine" "?" "I've been starin' at the sun for some time" "?" "It gets dark inside but I don't mind" "?" "And if you're gone it's like I'm goin' blind" "?" "I can't get by this time" "Josie!" "Josie!" "Alan M!" " What are you doing here?" " I had to tell you that even though you don't feel the same way about me as I do about you and even though you didn't come to my gig..." " Wyatt told me it was cancelled!" " That dick!" "What did you mean, "I don't feel the same way about you as you do about me?"" "That's what I came here to tell you." "Josie McCoy, I..." "I love you!" "I love you too!" "I always have!" " Hi." " Hi." "Damn." "?" "Spin around and around and around and around" "?" "I never wanna come back down" "?" "Cos everything that I lost I found" "?" "Yeah" "?" "Spin around and around, yeah" "?" "Spin around and around, yeah" "?" "Spin around and around, yeah" "?" "Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah" "(laughs) Contain the excitement." " Why'd you have to hit me?" " It's just never gonna stop." "Did you see me hit my nose on the mike?" "From this command centre, we control everything except what I'm gonna say next." "I can't even believe that they let me bring..." "You slept with him!" "He'd better get Mama to get him a new face." " You know my mom's dead." " That's just..." "Next up on weather..." "What is wrong with you?" "Goodness, won't somebody please save us?" "Hey!" "Those are my bunny ears." "This is what our operation..." "I just spat right into the camera." "Yeah, right!" "Cos you know I'm just gonna..." "Visiontext Subtitles:" "Paul Murray" "?" "They say this kind of love is wrong, but you know it feels so right" "?" "Running my hands across your cheeks, they're, oh, so smooth and white" "?" "Leave the light on, baby, and unlock your back door" "?" "I'll be comin' through that way tonight to love you for sure" "?" "Lyin' on your bed, staring' up at the moon" "?" "You got me crazy, gotta love you soon" "?" "I'm your backdoor lover" "?" "Comin' from behind with the lights down low" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Just you and me, no one has to know" "?" "Backdoor lover" "?" "Gonna meet you there at the secret spot" "?" "I'll show you a love that's more than hot" "?" "Well, he looks at me with those innocent eyes" "?" "And says "It looks like you're wearin' some kinda disguise" "?" "Because your hair sticks up, your shoes are untied. "" "? "I hope that you got that shirt at half price. "" "?" "And every word I say falls flat on the floor" "?" "I try to tell a joke, he's heard it before" "?" "And I don't think that I can take it no more" "?" "It's drivin' me right out my front door" "?" "Why do you do what you do to me, baby?" "?" "You're shakin' my confidence, drivin' me crazy" "?" "You know if I could I'd do anything for you" "?" "Please don't ignore me cos you know I adore you" "?" "Nobody rocks the mike like Dujour" "?" "Bangin' round the world with, wish you could be friends, Dujour" "?" "We're number one and stayin' at the top of our game" "?" "From east to west, we know you already know our name" "?" "Dujour around the world for ever, yeah" "?" "Flyin' so high in all kinds of weather" "?" "We're number one in this game" "?" "And I think you know our name is Dujour" "?" "Nobody rocks the mike like Dujour" "?" "Ride on your motorbike with Dujour" "?" "I'm a punk rock prom queen" "?" "Brown paper magazine" "?" "Hotter than you've ever seen" "?" "Everywhere and in between" "?" "I'm a ten-ticket thrill ride" "?" "Don't you wanna come inside?" "?" "A five-star triple threat, hardest of the hard to get" "?" "No one's little red Corvette, ain't seen nothin' like it yet" "?" "It took six whole hours and five long days" "?" "For all your lies to come undone" "?" "And those three small words were way too late" "?" "Cos you can't see that I'm the one" "(Mr Moviefone) Jerkin'"