"Ladies and gentlemen" "Welcome to the night's performance of: "Naked Boys Singing"." "Please note that flash photography with use of recording devices ... of any kind is strictly prohibited." "So please ..." "leave the flashing to us." "As a friendly reminder please keep your hands inside the ride of all times ... and kindly turn off ..." "all pages and cell phones" "Should a cell phone go off during the show ... we have been known to drag ..." "the guilty part to the stage." "Swipe them off their phones ..." "and there clothes... and make them sing and dance with the cast ... naked." "which is always fun." "And now, we present to you:" ""Naked Boys Singing"" "Gratuitous nudity." "Tonight!" "..." "you'll finally get what you paid for." "Tonight!" "..." "you'll see what our bodies are made for" "Tonight!" "..." "get ready for something risqué'" "Tonight!" "..." "we throw inhibition away." "Why even bother to make a fuss ... when it's obvious ... to us, you're here to see ... gratuitous nudity." "Tonight!" "..." "we show no remorse or apology." "Tonight!" "..." "we sing Billy Graham doxology." "Tonight!" "..." "it's no wonder that we're all the rage." "Tonight!" "..." "we give new meaning to a bare stage." "Pat Robertson should live in fear." "Stick it in your rear." "We're here." "No crudity." "Just gratuitous nudity." "My mother ..." "spent all of the money she earned, on tap shoes and tights and the lessons I've learned." "If she saw me today, well what would I say?" "For my ten years of tap ... and six years of ballet." "Look, ..." "I'm grateful for ..." "all my professional gains." "And now I can tell her:" ""Hey look ma, no Hanes"." "Tonight!" "..." "There's an atmosphere where it's alright to stare." "Tonight!" "..." "You won't wonder what's under our underwear." "Oh!" "..." "Oh!" "..." "Oh!" "..." "Jerry ..." "sorry ...." "Jerry." "So phone." "I knew it ..." "So phone." "I'll take that." "Hallo?" "No, This is not Sal." "Who is this?" "Sal's mom." "He can't get to the phone now." "He's about to get naked." "Did you hear the announcing ..." "before the show?" "No I'm sorry." " Well, What it said is." "If your cell phone went off during the performance, You have to get naked with us." "So ..." "So come on Sal, come on." "Sorry, Sal, you won't get the phone back, for you are in the show now." "So can you sing and dance?" "'course, we can use another guy." "All right." "Who want to see Sal sing and dance" " Naked?" "Do you want to see Sal sing and dance?" " Yea, come on Sal." "So, in a count of tree, - this will be Sal's very first naked performance." "Ready?" "Ready, Sal?" "One ... two ..." "tree." "Where were we?" "Tonight!" "... there's an atmosphere where it's alright to stare." "Tonight!" "..." "You won't wonder what's under our underwear." "You're straight or you're bi ..." "or transgendered or queer." "There's only one reason tonight ..." "that you're here." "So side by side and front to rear." "We will shout out loud:" ""We're proud"." "No prudity." "Tonight you're gonna see." "I stand before you naked." "What's left of me to show?" "The doors and blinds are shut now." "There's nowhere else to go." "I've peeled off all the layers." "And what have I discovered?" "That being naked means much more .." "than being just uncovered." "Today I want to learn ..." "all that nakedness could mean." "I need to know that who I am, ..." "isn't shameful or obscene." "For if what we think is true." "And honesty our goal." "Oh then nakedness is just ..." "another window to the soul." "Tonight!" "..." "No drama tragic with a bleak end." "Tonight!" "..." "It's more like Palm Springs on a weekend." "Tonight!" "..." "Good old Shakespeare's considered a bore." "Tonight!" "..." "Something new and unique is in store." "We love to hear our audience roar." "just hear them roar!" "If you yell and scream ..." "for more you're sure to see." "Oh yes you're sure to see." "Oh yes they're sure to see." "Gratuitous, gratuitous, gratuitous, gratuitous nudity." "Tonight." "The Naked Maid." "I told an old acquaintance I was desperate for a job." "And oddly then he asked if I was anal or a slob." "He said he cleaned apartments and, he could use a hand." "But, there's one stipulation ... his customers demand." "Scrubbing toilets with your dick out." "Vacuum carpets in the buff." "Making sure your buttocks stick out." "Waiting for the sheets ..." "to fold and fluff." "Flash a lot of muscle." "while dutifully you hustle, ... to make a hovel ..." "sparkle like the Taj Mahal." "Nudity is fun to me." "Attention is like sex to me." "Cleaning is good therapy, ..." "so till my bills are paid," "I really sort of love my job." "I'm a naked maid." "At the start the client's nervous." "That's when you become the host." "Tell them all about your service." "Laugh about ..." "which Olsen twin you hate the most." "Next you start disrobing." "And then begin your probing." "Looking for the tools ..." "you need to clean his house." "Paper towels and bathroom duck." "And all the while he wants to fuck." "Unless he's cute he's out of luck, ..." "my business cards are laid." "Not "mop and blow or spic and spank" it says "The naked maid"" "Call me." "You are dirty." "He will follow you like cattle." "Let him ogle all he likes." "As you clean you sort of prattle." "Entertain him ..." "as the moment strikes." "An odd scenario." "Some say it's scary." "Oh." "It's naked stand-up comedy ..." "except you use a broom." "Working on my hands and knees." "Getting into crevices." "Knowing that I'm sure to ..." "please you as I promenade." "It's good clean fun for you and me." "Just call the naked maid." "I charge extra for The Valley." "But I give a discount, ..." "if you live in West Hollywood." "The neighbors will love it..." "when I doo windows" "When all is clean and dried, ..." "I gave it my best shot." "The body of my work ..." "has left him pleased, ... yet hot." "For now until my ship comes in, ..." "I really wouldn't trade ..." "The satisfaction that I get to be your naked maid." "But ... just to add a coda." "That when I reach my quota." "I don't care an iota for the gift of cleanliness." "I hope you won't think less." "Unless I can undress ... to show off and impress." "I crave all to obsess." "The irony I guess ..." "is my place, is a mess." "What a dump." "The Bliss Of A Bris" "When I was eight days old ..." "a crowd gathered in my room." "With a man in a robe and hat and something shiny in his hand." "And he said: ..." "Behold the fruit of his mother's womb." "And he spoke in a language ..." "that I couldn't even understand." "Baruchatah ..." "Whatever." "And the people squealed ..." "as my manhood was revealed." "And he held it up ..." "for everyone to see." "They said it was Divine." "And they toasted it with wine." "And behaved ..." "as though it had a pedigree." "Ah the Bliss, ..." "of a Bris." "When they all congregate ..." "to admire your penis." "They stare." "And the glare ... of their idolization ..." "is brighter than Venus." "They're awed." "They applaud ... as they thrill at the sight..." "of it's dazzling perfection." "They gasp as they grasp ... how sublime it will be ..." "when it has an erection." "They rave at the length ..." "and the marvelous angle." "They kvell at the girth and ..." "they plotz at the dangle." "It doesn't get better than this." "The Bliss of a Bris." ""Mazel Tov"." "You suppose that these roses ..." "are going to be thrown every day." " Whee." "Ah!" "But then they snip off the tip ..." "once you've shown it." "And that's when they say:" "don't expose it again." "But I do. ..." "I'll show you." "And then you may ..." "commence complimenting and cooing ... so gaze." "Give it praise." "Like a Liz Taylor movie ..." "with Rex Reed reviewing." "Acclaim it." "Adore it. ..." "Extol it." "Exalt it." "Rejoice in it's glory." "For God's sake don't fault it." "Fawning and flattering, ..." "worshipping, swooning." "Remember ..." "it doesn't need any more pruning." "Just say ..." ""It's like butter."" "So now bagel cutter her." "Bask in it's splendor." "Unplug the blender." "No sharp objects near it." "Simply revere it." "Oh how I miss ..." "a Bliss of a Bris." "Window to Window" "There you are again." "Passing by your window." "Will you look out, ..." "and see me standing here?" "Here I am again." "Standing at my window." "Will we play the same old game?" "So far, so near." "The accidental glance, where we discover one another." "Then we'll make up an excuse to look again." "And finally we fix our gaze from behind our window sills." "Where we silently agree we both like what we see." "And here we are again." "Slowly rising passion." "Will this be the night, ..." "you beckon me to come to you?" "'Cause if you send for me, I will touch you and caress you." "And if you send for me, ..." "I will tell you all the things I dream." "And how ev'rything with you, ..." "feels so right." "And make sweet love,..." "until the morning light." "Here we go again. ..." "Taking off our shirts." "And teasing with the way, ..." "we slide our pants down." "And in our underwear. ..." "How we stop and stare." "The things that we go through, ..." "to let our guards down." "The connection that was made ..." "from window to window." "There's magic in that alone." "A moment by itself, ..." "that can't be taken lightly." "At last someone ..." "to call my own." "And if you send for me, ..." "I will feel and kiss and hold you." "And if you send for me, ..." "I will share my beating heart." "Knowing everything with you, .." "will be alright." "And make sweet love, ..." "until the morning light." "I see the way you want me." "It's the way that I want you." "I want you ..." "I want you ..." "I want you." "Please won't you send for me?" "We could start a lifetime of caring." "Come on send for me. ..." "Take a risk." "Be daring." "I know everything for us, ..." "will turn out right." "No don't pull down the shade. ..." "And don't turn out your light." "Let's end this silly game." "Don't lose sight." "Please, just one last peek." "I'm the one you seek." "Well then." "Until tomorrow night" "Fight the Urge" "Don't." "Please don't." "Don't do it." "Think of really ugly girls, ..." "and the smell of body odor and your parents having sex." "Eugh!" "Don't." "I'm embarrassed and I'm shy and it's happening by reflex." "Wait." "Please wait." "Wait a minute." "Wait until I'm in my locker and they've given me my towel and I've put on my Hanes." "Shit." "Wait." "It's an evolution oversight, that dicks have no brains." "Breathe." "Just breathe." "Breathe deeply." "Pretend you're in a forest, surrounded ..." "by tranquility and no one else is here." "Right." "Breathe." "Nothing like hard evidence, ..." "to prove that I'm a queer." "Screwing up in gym class ..." "or the baseball field." "The basketball court." "The wrestling match." "I hate this Nazi torture, ..." "as it stands" "Then like World War II, ..." "we're forced to wait for the shower." "And I don't have the power, to control my fucking glands." "Thank God for my hands." "Fight the urge." "No - wait." " Breathe." "Fight the urge." "Really ugly girl." "In my Hanes." "No one's here." "Let my mind and body converge." "Yes it's for thrills, ..." "to see Bobby Baker nude." "but you don't understand, ..." "that pointing is rude." "Fight the urge." "Stop." "Oh stop." "Stop thinking." "The more you focus on it, ..." "the more the blood is flowing." "The more you feel the rush." "Help." "Stop." "It makes the lead go to my pencil, ..." "and my whole body flush." "Letting nature happen here, ..." "could ruin my life." "And get me punched in the nose." "Called a big fag." "I wonder if this fight, ..." "will take it's toll?" "So while I'll never be normal ..." "and I won't have a wife." "I can still have a life ..." "if I can get myself under control." "That's the goal." "Don't think of a pole" "Or a hole." "Hey, Bobby." "Bobby Baker, Bobby Baker, Bobby Baker, Bobby, Bobby, Bobby Baker." "Oh wait." "Please wait." "Wait a minute until I am at my locker ..." "and I've put on my Hanes." "Shit" " Wait" " Oh" " Hate this Nazi torture give me my fucking towel." "No." "No." "No." "Fight the urge." "Don't wait breathe stop Don't wait breathe stop" "Fight the urge." "Bloody nose." "You're a faggot." "Ruin my life." "All these thoughts ..." "I'm desperate to purge." "No one's noticed yet." "If they did I'd have died." "I can't let anyone know ..." "what's happening inside." "I am all alone." "Nothin' But the Radio On" "Honey, Aunt Ruby just gave ..." "Daddy and me this Playgirl magazine." "Now, I can't believe ..." "you'd expose yourself like that." "I don't know how I'm ever gonna ..." "hold my head up in this town again." "What were you thinking?" "Hey Chris, why didn't you tell me ..." "you were gonna ruin your career ... not to mention mine?" "I'm your agent, we've gotta talk." "Hold on I've got another call coming in." "Marilyn Monroe posed without clothes, ... for a backroom calendar;" "one of those." "The nation was shocked." "Mama called her a sleaze." "But she sold a million calendars ..." "and tripled her fees." "She was just starting ..." "and a little naive." "When the press asked hon:" ""what did you have on?"" "Would you believe she said?" "I had nothing but the radio on." "Nothing but the radio on." "Now tell me boys is that so wrong?" "You'd best be believing, ..." "it was playing the sweetest song." "With nothing but the radio on." "Young Burt Reynolds ..." "did his own spread" "In Cosmo magazine, everybody has read." "On a bearskin rug with a grin on his face." "With one hand over his talent." "The man has taste." "And two decades later Momma's just stunned." "But when the talk died down ..." "in our sleepy town." "in the sleepy old town ..." "Burt was the new number one." "And he had nothing but the radio on." "Nothing but the radio on." "Now tell me boys is that so wrong?" "You'd best be believing, it was playing the sweetest song." "Nothing but the radio on." "With nothing but a few dreams, and a pleasing personality." "Though I had ambition I was shy." "But you know I kind a like ..." "being in the light." "When the cameras started clicking" "I was a star burning bright." "And I had nothing but the radio on." "Nothing but the radio." "Nothing but the radio." "Now I don't believe that it's oh so wrong." "And from now on ..." "they'll be playing my country song." "Yea!" "Nothing but the radio on." "I'm at my best." "I'm better than all the rest." "Nothing but the radio on." "Nothing but the radio on. ..." "Nothing but the radio on. ..." "Jack's Song." "When all those trials and tribulations gather daily at my door." "When all those petty aggravations are attracting even more." "In my hour of desperation something always pulls me through." "Thus I find rejuvenation doing what I always do." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "I get a grip and zip zip zip." "I'm gonna give myself a treat." "I seek relief." "I pound my beef." "I breathe a sigh and yet, ..." "if I don't feel contented and complete." "I just repeat." "I beat my meat." "You don't need an education You don't need a PHD." "All you need is concentration and the rest comes naturally." "You don't need collaboration." "Calvin Klein's or great physiques." "Now we'll do a demonstration ... of a few of our techniques." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "I get a grip and zip zip zip I'm gonna give myself a treat." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "I breathe a sigh and yet, ..." "if I don't feel contented and complete." "Then I repeat, and I repeat, and I repeat." "I beat my meat" "Pardon us for moralizing." "But our favorite form of exercising." "Is socially correct" "As well as appetizing." "'Cause who would serve a steak in need of tenderizing." "So ..." "I beat my meat" "I beat my meat" "And zip zip zip I get a grip." "I'm gonna give myself a treat." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "And when I do I'm telling you I'm contented and complete." "I get a thrill." "I get the grill." "Change my attire." "And light the fire." "I salt I oil and then I broil then we say grace and then we eat." "But first I beat, but first I beat, but first I beat, but first I beat" "I beat my meat." "Robert Mitchum" "There must be something wrong with me." "'Cause I don't find in the least sexy." "All those pretty boys with their perfect bods." "Prancing around like Hollywood gods." "Yet, everywhere that I care to look." "In every movie and every book." "I see, I see, I see." "Those guys with their deltoids pumped." "And their sex appeal has my libido stumped." "As for me, I long for the days of Robert Mitchum." "I know he was a little beefy and soft." "But when he took it all off." "He was Bitchin" "As for me I long for the days when guys didn't look, like they spent all week at the gym." "Skinny legs and love handles were in." "At least a smidgeon, ..." "give me Robert Mitchum." "Now I'm not immune to the well known charms, of a drop dead chest and some well toned arms." "But a little flaw here and there makes it hard for me not to stare." "Now I'll never look like Marky Mark." "But some people say I've a real big heart." "It's true it's true oh God I would have been hot back then." "Before the age of implants and collagen." "As for me I long for the days of Robert Mitchum." "Though he smoked, and did a lot of bad stuff." "But when he acted real tough." "He had me twitching'." "As for me I long for the days when guys didn't drink bottled water but bottles of gin." "Or fret about the state of their skin." "That's when I would ditch 'em." "Give me Robert Mitchum." "Does anybody remember him in Cape Fear?" "Now that was a moving experience." "He was homicidally sexually serious." "Bad to the core and the little he wore." "I'll never forget and better yet." "When his bedroom eyes came into view." "You know he knew just what to do." "A perfect ten." "Back in the days of real men." "Like Robert Mitchum." "And I'm not alone." "As for us, we long for the days of .." "Robert Mitchum." "When guys came in all sizes and shapes." "And some could even get dates." "And while we're dishin'" "As for us we long for the days when guys weren't so young." "Or tall or thin or perfectly done." "Now let's be frank." "So perfectly hung." "A perfect ten back in the days of real men." "Like Robert Mitchum." "Members Only" "According to the American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language." "Penis is the male organ of copulation." "And in mammals urinary excretion." "When one lists the male genitalia." "There's one book 'twill never ever failya." "When fishing' for a definition let us not forget." "The infamous Thesaurus by Roget." " Rogét" "According to the southern Baptist sexual manual - penis is" "In matters categorical or even metaphorical" "We've only found an oracle or something sophomorical." "So unabridged, and until now, unexposed" "We present the different geneses." "The long and short of what we call our penises." "Dick dick prick prick" "Dick." " Prick." "Dick." " Prick." "Dick." " Prick." "Dick." " Prick." "Dick." " Prick." "Dick." " Prick." "Dick-a ..." "Prick-a ..." "Dick-a ..." "Prick-a ..." "Dick-a ..." "Prick-a" "Schlong dong ..." "Schlong dong ..." "Peter penis cock ..." "Peter penis cock ..." "Weenie weenie weenie weenie Weenie weenie weenie weenie" "Woody woody woody woody Woody woody woody woody" "Does he wear it on the right?" "Is it tan or black or white?" "Does he wear it on the left?" "Big fat short thin?" "Pink or purple head?" "Thick. fat. short, thin?" "Is it tan or is it red?" "Or pink tan black white" "Big or small?" "Left or right?" "Here's a dink and here's a pecker." "Here it cums, ..." "a double decker." "What a wanker!" "What a wanker!" "What a wanker!" "What a wanker!" "Cut uncut Cut uncut Cut uncut -------- cut" "Remember the members Peeeeeeeeeeeee ... nis." "Perky Little Porn Star" "You see?" "I'm a perky little porn star from Skokie, Illinois." "My mother doesn't like my job at all." "If I have to go to work." "Sexuality's a perk." "But she says it's just as far as I can fall." "See I'm a Jewish boy inside, ..." "but the nice part went and died, ... on the first day, ..." "that I showed up on the set." "I could hear the rabbi screaming, ... 'cause I did what I was dreaming ... since the day, ..." "I saw Tab Hunter soaking wet." "When your background is suburban, ... sex can be a bit perturbing, ... subject of your penis is taboo." "It really is a thrill though, ..." "to monkey with a dildo, ... and let the world watch ..." "you while you screw." "I'm a perky little porn star from Skokie, Illinois." "I can't believe it's happening to me." "Guys are jealous of the sex ... with Ryan, Jeff and Rex." "I get to live a gay mans fantasy." "But try to tell an old curmudgeon ..." "that you like to push the fudge in ... for the cam'ras ..." "with two guys or three or four." "He will call you Heretic ..." "Sinner, Aberrant, you are sick." "Blow the shofar, ..." "not a boy on Yom Kippur." "If I shoot a film on Sukkoth, .." "dicks both in my mouth and tuchus" "A sudden gust of family shame, ..." "attacks" "I continue giving head, ... and pretend that mom is dead, ... so my conscience ..." "and my sphincter can relax." "I'm a perky little porn star ..." "from Skokie, Illinois" "I don't quite make a killing ..." "spilling seed." "But the money's pretty good, ... and as long as I get wood, ..." "I can have ..." "the little comforts that I need." "See, ..." "depending on the ratio, ... of schtupping to fellatio ... and what I'll do, ..." "and what he'll do to me." "I know I've really got 'em, ..." "if I say I'll top or bottom." "Profit comes from versatility." "There's a part of me that's guilty, ... but if my costar is built, ... he makes me whimper, ..." "jodle, scream and sound and beg." "Thrilled the film is getting made, ..." "I'm getting paid and getting laid. ... and his family jewels, ..." "are larger than my leg." " Whee!" "I'm a perky little porn star ..." "from Skokie, Illinois." "I've got some awesome films ..." "for you to rent." "This may be my legacy." "No great actor's life for me." "And I guess this means ..." "I can't be president." "So my prospects may seem bleak." "You may see me as a freak." "But I did it, ..." "and I'll take the consequence." "I guess I needed to rebel, ... from my goodie goodie hell." "But I love it and I made it" "Pretty soon I'll get a cut, ... when they start to sell ..." "the nifty rubber version of my butt." "And when my posterior ..." "goes down for posterity." "They can't say he's inferior, ..." "because he chose to bare it." "He's a perky little porn star from Skokie, from Skokie, Illinois." "I'm a perky little porn star from Skokie Illinois. --- Oi!" "Kris, Look What You've Missed." "I was naked." "I was raw, ... and oh so vulnerable." "I got angry." "I got lost." "I loved you so much." "Such talent, such humor." "So much to live for." "With passion." "With fever." "You were my life." "You're the one who left." "But there's nothing left to me" "Kris look what you've missed." "I have more friends there, ... than I do here." "So many." "So wasteful." "I try to forget." "I'm busy." "I'm active." "I have to survive." "I am empty." "It's lonely." "But I am alive." "I'm the one who's left." "And I wanted it to be we." "Kris look what you've missed." "I miss you." "I wonder how much you'd have changed." "Life goes on." "I'm dating." "I have a great job." "I love you." "I laugh now." "Remembering things." "You're with me." "Part of me." "We're growing up." "We are still as one." "Oh but I'm becoming me." "Kris, look what you've missed." "Richard got fat." "Then got thin." "Marco went bald." "And Michael is famous." "And Sam hasn't changed." "Your nephew is married." "The whole world's on line." "There's hope now." "We're living." "I feel OK." "I am standing strong now." "Here with my memories." "Kris. " "I met a man, ..." "and he loves me so very much." "He's nothing like you, ... and I love him too." "We're happy." "We're one now." "We have a good life." "I'm me now." "I'm whole now." "I'm a grown man." "Kris, look what you missed." "Oh, Kris ..." "Oh, Kris ..." "Oh, Kris ... look at what you missed." "Muscle Addiction" "Six AM." "The sun is gone, ..." "and my eyes all droopy." "I'm yawnin." "Everybody's looking, ..." "all mean and grim." "Why the hell, ..." "do I come to the gym?" "My eyes say no." "My lips say no." "My head says no." "But Willie says yeah, yeah, ..." "yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." "You've gotta be ..." "a pumpy junkie boy if you wanna be a ..." "humpy hunky boy." "Then you've gotta be ..." "a pumpy junkie boy." "if you wanna be ..." "a humpy hunky muscleman." "My muscles shake ..." "and I'm soaking wet." "And I'm just finishing ..." "my first set." "I look in the mirror and feeling some pride, ..." "when a big boy comes and stands by my side." "I feel like a stick ..." "standing next to him." "Why the hell ..." "do I come to the gym?" "Biceps say no." "Triceps say no." "My legs say no." "But Willie says yeah, yeah, ..." "yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." "You've gotta be ..." "a pumpy junkie boy if you wanna be ..." "a humpy hunkie boy." "Then you gotta be ..." "a pumpy junkie boy if you wanna be ..." "a humpy hunky muscleman" "Run on the treadmill." "I'm outta' air." "Run in place and I get nowhere." "Wheezing, panting, and growing dim." "Why the hell ..." "do I come to the gym?" "My lungs say no." "My legs say no." "My heart says no." "But Willie says yeah." "It's true for you and it's true for me." "Gay men got ..." "to be fat free." "Arch your back." "Turn." "Pose." "Head for the shower." "Slowly peel ." "your sweaty clothes." "Pout, brood, sulk, scowl." "Slip into a skimpy towel." "And as you step beneath ..." "the steamy spray." "Pretend you don't notice ..." "you're on display." "Keep on soaping, ..." "groping too." "Because everybody's ..." "secretly scoping you." "Fire." "Steam." "Like a sweaty dream." "The figure shift ..." "is straining your eyes." "Feel the tension ..." "rise and rise." "Cruisey." "Floozy." "Who is he?" "And my arms say Aahh." "And my back says Aahh." "And my legs say Aahh." "And Willie?" "Willie says:" "Hi" "Later?" "..." "Yeah later." "Romeo and Juliet it ain't." "So, ..." "get out of the steam room." "Before you faint." "If god made his angels ..." "with his muscle grace." "Then Heaven ... must be a hot ..." "and sweaty place." "This may sound dumb ..." "and this may sound silly." "But I'm pretty sure ..." "I'm working out for Willie." "Getting big and buff ..." "should go." "Does it matter ..." "which head is in control?" "Who cares ..." "if the little heads the one?" "As long as ..." "you get your workout done." "Yes, ..." "I'm doing it all for him." "Now I know ..." "why I go to the gym." "And Willie says yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah." "The Entertainer." "You come to see my show." "Amazed at how ..." "I let you know the real me." "You ask yourself "What's this?"" "You simply can't ..." "resist a mystery." "I open up my heart and soul in every part and role "to be or not to be."" "And I hit the perfect stance." "I croon a tune." "I do my dance." "You clutch your chest." "Let out a sigh." "May I suggest." "There's so much more than meets the eye." "It's all a lie." "A filthy lie." "Right now I'm thinking "God I hate this job." "Life sucks." "I wanna die"" "But I pull through." "It's all for you." "I'm the entertainer." "Bette's divine." "Barbra's sublime." "'cource when they're inky mopy bitchy or just out of their fucking minds." "They still deliver." "Like me they're givers." "We're entertainers." "Night after night." "We do it right." "We're entertainers." "See when I strip the layers off you'll agree." "All I am is just a facsimile." "Of everything I work ..." "so very hard to get you to see." "Beneath the makeup and costumes ..." "and lights you'd never have guessed." "That I've got aches and pains ..." "and fever and congestion in my chest" "Chest." "Jerry ..." "Thank you" "Chest." "It's all a lie." "But I get by." "I'll hit the wings, stare in the mirror, hate myself and start to cry." "It's what I do." "So sad but true." "I'm the entertainer ..." "Onstage we shine." "Offstage we whine." "We're entertainers." "But see you boys." "But when I strip the layers off, you'll agree." "All I am is just a facsimile." "Of everything I work ..." "so very hard to get you to see." "Beneath the makeup 'nd costumes ..." "'nd lights you'd never have guessed." "That I've got aches 'nd pains 'nd bumps 'nd sprains." "Bruises 'nd scrapes 'nd varicose veins." "Bunions 'nd migraines 'nd sinus 'nd gas." "Laryngitis, bronchitis, arthritis, a rash." "Bloated 'nd tired 'nd nauseous 'nd sleepy." "Frustrated, fatigued 'nd I gotta go pee pee." "I'm lonely, I'm needy, I'm cranky and I am depressed." "Oh but please." "Don't cry for me." "Up here wee thrive and feel alive." "It's better than nine to five." "I love it so." "This called show." "And though I love to stay folks." "I gotta go." "But we'll be back." "Without a crowd just lay me flat." "Splat" "I need to see my name ..." "on that old marquee." "And stand in front and be some fake ..." "yet fabulous version of me." "Could we be plainer?" "I'm what then if not the entertainer?" "Oh yeah!" "Window to window (reprise)" "There you are again." "Passing by your window." "You look out, and see me standing here." "And here we are again." "Slowly rising passion." "Will this be the night you beckon me ... to come to you?" "Cause if you send for me ..." "I will touch you and caress you." "And if you send for me ..." "I will tell you all the things I dream." "I know everything with you feels so right." "And makes me love until the morning light." "I see the way you want me." "It's the way that I want you." "I want you." "I want you." "I want you." "Please won't you send for me?" "We can start our lifetime of caring." "Come on send for me." "Take a risk." "Be daring." "I know everything for us will turn out right." "Well then." "Until tomorrow night." "I stand before you naked." "What's left of me to show?" "The doors and blinds are shut now." "There's nowhere else to go." "Today I want to learn." "And today I want to love." "Today we fit inside each other." "And we're holding one another like a hand inside a glove." "And today I start to know." "What two lovers really mean." "And now I know that who I am isn't shameful or obscene." "But if what we think is truth." "and honesty our goal" "Oh then nakedness and nakedness is just ... another window to the soul." "And if you send for me" "I will feel and kiss and hold you." "And if you send for me ..." "I will share my beating heart." "Knowing everything ..." "for us will turn out right." "Tonight you'll finally get ..." "what you paid for." "I'm a perky little porn star from Skokie Illinois." "I really sort of love my job." "I'm a naked maid." "Tonight you will see what our bodies are made for." "Nothing but the radio on." "Tonight get ready for something risqué'." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "I beat my meat." "Tonight we throw inhibition away." "Give me Robert Mitchum." "I'm the entertainer." "Tonight Will Shakespeare's considered a bore." "Tonight something new and unique is in store." "We love to hear our audience roar." "just hear them roar" "If you yell and scream for more you're sure to see." "Oh yes there's sure to be." "Oh yes you're sure to see." "Gratuitous, gratuitous, gratuitous, gratuitous nudity." "Tonight." "Naked Boys Singing" "Yelled and scream for more." "Well." "Let's give a cheer, We're naked boys singing." "Marching to the beat of ..." "a different drum." "We will shed out clothes if you shed your inhibitions." "There isn't any plot but there is an exposition!" "Let's give a shout." "Let it all hang out!" "We're naked boys ---..." "Singing." "Subtitles by Max"