"THE SUCKER" "Can you give me a hand, Mrs. Chenu?" "Give me that." "Careful with my sandwich!" "Do I send your post to Carcassonne, like every summer?" "No, this year I'm doing a tour of Italy." "I hope it'll be warmer than here." "What a rotten summer!" "Thank you, Mrs. Chenu." "Bon voyage!" "I'll come back all tanned!" "Oh, no, it's a disaster!" "Just look at it!" "What's wrong?" " "What's wrong"?" " It's OK." "You can see what's wrong." "It won't go so well now, will it?" "Yes, that's right, just walk all over it!" " It's no big deal." " No big deal?" "That's a good one!" " What will I do now?" " You'll have to walk." "My holiday's ruined." "I was going to Italy." "The plane's quicker." "I'm in no hurry." "Well, I am!" "Have we finished here?" "If you like." "Here's my card." "My insurers will get in contact." "Really, though!" "Some people have got a nerve!" "Him and his big flashy motor!" "Léopold Saroyan, Managing Director..." "I couldn't give a damn!" "No to London, yes to New York." "And Stockholm..." "I don't know." "Mr. Maréchal is here." "Yes, I phoned him." "Send him in." "My poor friend, the victim..." "Mea culpa, eh?" "I'm sorry about yesterday." "So am I!" "Have a seat." "Careful!" "It's on castors." "I was up all night because of you." "Really?" "Sorry about that." "The shock." "What can I say?" "Spoiling your holiday will ruin mine." "Are you still intending to go to Italy?" "You might not have noticed, but my car had a little prang." "That's why I phoned you this morning." "I liked you the moment I saw you." "And I've had a little idea which will put everything right." "Cigar?" "From Havana." "Scotch?" "If you insist." "Here, just press the green button." "And watch over there." "Watch, watch..." "Well, well!" "That's not all." "Watch..." "That's splendid." "Really." "My friend Mr. Duschmurtz, from Miami, was coming to Europe with his Cadillac." "He was going to do the Parthenon, the Berlin Wall, the Folies Bergères..." "All of European civilisation!" " What's that?" " Nothing." "Just a second." "I'll give it to you." "Anyway, he received a telegram..." "I'll take that." "You're not listening." "So he got this telegram..." " Oh, yes." "Cheers." " Cheers." "He got a telegram telling him to fly straight back home." "His father's ill, his mother too..." "That's always a nuisance." "So the Cadillac's been abandoned." "The poor thing!" "It arrives by ship on Monday, in Naples." "Mr. Duschmurtz has asked me to get it from Naples to Bordeaux, from where it'll be shipped back to the US." "Naples to Bordeaux." "That'd be a nice drive." "And you, Mr. Maréchal, are going to make that nice drive!" "Me?" "Yes." "I'm over here." "Turn round." "Oh, sorry." "It's now 14th August, and the car has to be in Bordeaux on 27th August, to go back to Florida, Miami." "Thirteen days." "Italy seen from a Cadillac must be quite something!" "Are you pleased?" "Can I have a drop more scotch?" "The bottle's there." " Sir." " Thank you." "Your plane ticket to Naples." "And 500,000 lire for your expenses." "Mr. Saroyan, that's going too far!" "I'm more economical than a Cadillac!" "And we'll have lunch with a few friends." "Well, gentlemen," "I'm quite a success in my own field too." "I'm in baby clothes." "I'm in baby clothes!" "Can I just say something?" "Please do, my friend." "What should he read, to help him get to know Italy?" "You should take Stendhal's Walks in Rome." "A wonderful guide!" "I've already got the Michelin." " And I plan..." " We have to go now." "The plane won't wait, you know." "Time's pushing on." "Gentlemen, it was an honour." "The door's that way." "No, not that one." "This way." "The Michelin, baby clothes..." "Who is that idiot?" "I say..." "Don't bother with that." "Well, what did you think?" "Do you expect congratulations?" "You've entrusted our millions to the first nitwit..." "That Cadillac is precious, and you choose the driver without consulting us?" "And why everything in one go?" "100 kilos of heroin, 300 of gold, the Baalbek jewels..." "You're putting all our money in one basket." "I'm worried... for you!" "You'll have to explain it to our American associates." "I'll deal with them." "Just listen to me, will you!" "For a load like that we need a complete innocent." "It'll cause other problems." "If I lose my fortune with that car, it'll kill me..." "You too!" "It all depends on that moron." "Anything could happen to him." "I'm using him because he's honest and that shows on his face." "A great passport!" "Remember!" "Customs officers look at the man, not the car." "He's single, a shopkeeper, with a clean record." "My friends, the French group's survival is at stake here, so I made a decision, and you're going to OK it." "I myself will be following the Cadillac for the whole trip." "So let's recap, if you don't mind." "Give me a pencil." "The Cadillac, the wheels..." "The bumpers..." "Keep it simple!" "Now hang on..." "The windscreen, the bonnet, there!" "Where's the dope?" "In the rear wings." "And the gold?" "The front and back bumpers." "All covered in chrome, of course." "The Baalbek diamonds, emeralds and rubies are in the battery." "In an undetectable false bottom." "And this plan is signed..." "Saroyan." "There!" "Is the Yu-Kun-Kun in the battery too?" "No, sir!" "The Yu-Kun-Kun, the world's largest diamond, is there!" "On the eve of a great battle, Caesar said," ""I would burn my cloak if my cloak knew my plan."" "Let's follow Julius Caesar's example." "Don't end up like him!" "Oh, no." "The Yu-Kun-Kun, the world's largest diamond, is there!" "Hello." "The t-t-tape?" "I have here both the sound... and the image!" "Unfold it." "A plan?" "And signed Sa-Sa-Sa..." "Royan." "Wonderful, Mario!" "I've earned my ten percent." "When do I get it?" "When I nick the Cadillac." "Nothing's easy with Sa-Sa-Saroyan." "It's a doddle!" "Wait till you see the sucker they're using." " Does he know?" " Not a thing." "Poor bloke." "I hope we don't have to b-b-b..." "Beat him up?" "Bump him off!" "In hunting, everything's fair game, big or small!" "Pronto, pronto." "Oh, it works!" "Yes, pronto?" "This is the radio-telephone service." "What is your number?" "Marcadet 1819." "The number of your car." "Oh, hang on." "Florida 822-59." "I'm linking you up." "All right." "So, if anyone calls me, you'll put them through?" "Permesso!" "Me avanti!" "What a responsibility!" "A car this size..." "It's not like riding a bike." "And this horn won't stop!" "Good God, that horn!" "What's he doing?" "Thank you." "No, my luggage is in the hotel." "This?" " OK." " Great." "You can go." "Get down!" "Now keep a good distance." "Too close, he'll spot us." "Too far, we'll lose him." "All these people!" "I'll never find my way." "Monsieur?" "Signor?" "Buon giorno." " Do you speak French?" " No." "Napolitano." "Oh, this is going to be fun!" "Bumper knocked in at back and smashed at front." "So you fix, rapido!" "Because me in Naples two giorno now." "Finito here, time to be going." "No, not my macchina." "It's not possible?" "Maybe for a little consideration?" "Say, 20,000 lire?" "Does that change things a bit?" "No!" "Domani, when it's ready." "Tomorrow morning." "We understand each other." "Goodbye." "It's gold, Signor Tagliella." "Gold?" "Gold?" "Thank you." "There he is!" "A taxi?" "What happened to the car, then?" "In a garage." "That's wonderful!" "Looks like new." "Yes, I know it isn't really new." "What an idiot!" "Well, here's your 20,000 lire." "No, a deal is a deal." "15,000, then." "10,000, then, but I'm robbing you." "It's quite all right." "Really good work." " Have you got the keys?" " Yes." "Thanks." "And the things people say about Neapolitans!" "I'll tell everyone how honest you are." "Goodbye." "Have a good trip!" "I'm flat out." "We'll soon catch him up." "So you keep saying, but I can't see him." "This is Rome radio-telephone." "We're doing tests." "Can you hear me?" "Yes, perfectly." "By the way, could I make a call to Paris?" "What number?" "Solférino 1212." " Solférino 1212." " Right." " With call-back?" " Yes, fine." " What name?" " Mr. Saroyan." "Sa-Ro-Yan." "Cut that out!" "It's not me, it's the engine." " What engine?" " Ours!" "We're all out." " Out of what?" " Petrol." "Are you pulling my?" "I forgot to fill up in Naples." "I don't believe it!" "Who pays you?" "Boss, look, a petrol station!" "Come on, then, get pushing." "Come on!" "It's no good." "I'll have to push." " Boss." " Yes?" " Boss, look." " What?" "Oh, sorry!" "Fill her up, per favore." "Yes, yes." "Yes, I put in a call to Paris." "Yes, Mr. Saroyan." "Hold the line a second, please." "There's a call for Mr. Saroyan." "Put it through to the radio-telephone." "Jaguar 411-763, Milan." "Hello, yes, Saroyan here." "Hello, it's Maréchal." "What?" "Who?" "I can't hear you very well." "I can't hear you very well, Mr. Saroyan." "Cover me up!" "How's the weather?" "Overcast, but warm." "That's funny, I can hear you better now, as if I were standing next to you." "It's hot here too." "If you weren't so busy, we could have made this trip together." "Anyway, Mr. Saroyan, I just wanted to say thank you." "Not at all." "The least I could do." "No!" "One doesn't meet people like you every day." "You haven't broken down or had any repairs done?" "No, not at all." "I've never had a crash." "Apart from the day I met you." "Do you remember?" "You bet I do, you idiot!" "Drat!" "Cut off." " What do I owe you?" " 4,500." "Keep the change." "OK, boss, he's gone." "I'm suffocating!" "Pay him, quick!" "No idea what he was up to in Naples." "We'll find out later." "Come on, quick, let's get going!" "The hairdresser's, per favore." "What does the gentleman desire?" "Razor cut?" "It's beyond my means!" "So, a friction rub with Chanel?" "Or with Molineux or Farina?" "No, just the... the barba." "At least a manicure, eh?" "Yeah, why not?" "It's room 432." "Loulou, park the Austin in the hotel garage." "Cretino!" "Why do you make me jealous?" "Why don't you marry me?" "Because you make me jealous!" "Come in." "Mickey." " What?" " He's got visitors." "Here, you take over." "Do you need all those weapons?" "Yes, sir." "You have to suffer for beauty." "My good looks are in your hands?" "That's a big job!" " Is that an engagement ring?" " Yes." "He's a lucky man." "Pianissimo, please." "He doesn't think so." "He's in no hurry to marry me." "He's "thinking it over"." "Must be an intellectual!" "Your right hand, please." "Thank you." " What's he like, your fiancé?" " Siciliano." "Sicilian?" "That means jealous, eh?" "Yes, very." "A lot." "Terribilimente!" "He'd like to lock me up." "Why?" "He says it's the only way to have a faithful wife." "Mind you, if he's jealous, it's because he loves you." "But jealous men always end up..." " What's the word?" " Cornuto?" "That's it." "Cuckolded." "What?" "Did I say something?" "I'm sorry, but it's not my fault." "That's scalding!" "You're insane!" "Good for the wrinkles." "No, no, that's enough!" "No!" "Out you go!" "Go on." "Basta, basta!" "You understand me." "Goodbye!" "No, none of that!" "Go on, goodbye!" "There." "Thank you very much." " Can't we start again?" " Not right away." "A pity!" "I no longer recognise my hands." "Sorry." "I..." "I mean, you..." "You'll say something silly." "You think so?" "Still, tell me..." "Are you in love with your fiancé?" "You French are so indiscreet!" "So is the Roman sun!" "He's pulled her!" "He never ceases to amaze me!" "Hey, boss." "Why don't you check the Cadillac?" "A good idea!" "While he's..." "Wait for me here." " Miss?" " Gina." "You must know the best restaurants." "Yes." "You could go to Passeto's, La Taverna Flavia..." "Or La Casina Valadier, if you like music." "And you..." " Do you ever go there?" " Sometimes." "It'd be fun to meet there." "You at one table, me at another." "I'd invite you over to mine." "If you were alone." "Yes, but if I went, I probably wouldn't be alone." "That's why I'm asking you to go with me." "But I'm not free... until six o'clock." "The garage?" "Per favore, the way to the garage?" "Grazie." "Where are the keys?" "I left them in the car." "Oh, really!" "Get out of it!" "How did this happen?" "Get out of it!" "Is someone there?" "No, nobody." "Oh, right." "I don't believe it!" "Where are the keys?" "They must be in my room." "What's going on?" "Hey, did you?" "Hey, you!" "Get me down!" "No, no..." "Descendi!" "La macchina, descendi!" "What are you doing?" "Stop it!" "What are you doing?" "Stop it!" "Fermare!" "Do you hear me?" "Stop it, I said!" "Now I'm feeling sick." "What a way to carry on!" "Give me la scala." "He doesn't understand!" "The laddero!" "The laddero." "You're not very bright, are you?" "Give that here!" "Look at this." "It's ridiculous!" "The car's going down again now." "Stop it!" "Stop the car!" "Stop the car, I said!" "Are you just starting in this business or what?" "That's what I was looking for." "Good." "Grazie." "He must be a bit simple." "Take this and we'll forget all about it." "This is for you." "Sì." "Per lei." "Here, take it!" "What an idiot!" "He doesn't even understand his own language." "A table for two?" " Do you have a reservation?" " No." "We're very busy tonight." "But I'll see if I can find you a small table." "Thank you." "Caviar and champagne to start?" " Well?" " Yes, I'm starving." "Caviar, champagne..." "and everything else!" "Rome!" "Rome..." "You and I, together, here." "Who'd have thought it?" "I feel so good!" "Be careful!" "Your hand, quick!" "What, here?" "No, not like that." "Like this." "Oh, Antonio!" "That's the third time you've done that!" " Let's go." " What about dinner?" "I'm no longer hungry." "Gina, what's the matter?" "Nothing." "Antoine, take me away." "Where?" "To my place?" "Oh, yes!" "No, let's leave Rome." "Tonight or tomorrow... if that's what you want." "You must be really sad to ask me that." "In you get." "At last!" "Sleep with one eye open, but sleep at least!" "The Cadillac!" "The stammerer's in Rome!" "The stammerer's in Rome!" "The dope, the Cadillac..." "My holster!" "Go on, fire!" "The swine's shooting at us!" "Shoot at the tyres!" "Missed!" "You try!" "Missed, missed!" "The dope!" "It's blowing away!" "What's all this powder?" "I can't see a thing!" "Let me sit there." "You take the steering wheel." "Watch out!" "The gun!" "Got him!" "Don't shoot!" "Wait there." "Do repairs?" "I'll pay." "Soldi!" "Grazie." "Get back to Rome." "Quick!" "I'll turn the engine on." "It'll need warming up." "Yes, I heard you." "The fiancé." "Faster!" "Stop." "Hello." "Now you won't be alone for the rest of your drive." "Forgive me, Antoine." "Forgive you?" "But I'm really proud that I mad him jealous." "Careful!" "He might have his razor on him." "Farewell, Gina." "You'll always be a lovely memory of Italy." "Be happy." "Ciao, Antoine." "Ach, the French!" "With them, always love!" "No, no..." "They Italian, me French." "Goodbye, Gina." "Goodbye." "My name is Ursula Lamberschausenberger." "Does that name suit you?" "Is it like you?" "And I like you too, sir." "Thanks." "I'm Antoine." "That's all." "Then let us go, Mr. That's All!" "A good start!" "Aren't you a bit overexposed?" "No, because I always put suntan oil on." "Do you know how?" "No, but I'm a quick learner." "So you're a bit of a nature lover?" "Yes, I am a naturist." "Prudery gives people dirty thoughts." "Do you have dirty thoughts?" "Me?" "No, not at all." "Good." "Because men and women are all made the same." "With a few small differences!" "No, we have two of everything:" "arms, ears..." "Stop!" "I get the point." "I know what I'm talking about." "I am a student of anatomy at Heidelberg University." "Danke." "You are a good dancer." "But that isn't what I like about you." "What is it, then?" "Not my hair!" "Guess." "My eyes?" "My mother thinks they're lovely." "She is my mother, though." "It isn't physical." "My intelligence, then?" "My father thinks I'm intelligent." "He is my father, though." "What I like about you is that you're so unaffected." "I'd hate to be affected!" "We drove past the best hotels in Sienna and Florence, and you didn't even look." "But I know what you were thinking." ""Poor Ursula doesn't have a smart frock in her little bag."" "So you stopped here instead, knowing it would suit me better." "Is that your impression of me?" "But camping suits me too!" "You hide your niceness, which makes you even nicer." " Shall we go night-night?" " That's a good idea." "There..." "Signorina, a kilo of sugar, please." "Grazie." "Well..." "Well..." "Goodnight." "They've gone to bed." "Three in here!" "It's unbearable!" "We've been in here hours." "Look at this mess!" "What's this?" "Is it yours?" "And this?" "Yours?" "And this?" "Here!" "Handle this with care..." "With great care!" "Did you hear something?" "A mosquito." "No, missed it." "Got it!" "Don't laugh!" "I'm going for a shower." " Antoine?" " Yes, Ursula?" " Are you sleepy?" " Not really." "Me neither." " Shall we go for a stroll?" " Yes, that's a good idea." "Ouch!" "Have you about finished?" "Shall we swim?" "I want to very much." "I don't have my costume with me." "Neither do I." "You mean naked, in front of you?" "I'd be too embarrassed." "Not me." "I'm a naturist." "Well... go ahead, then." "Oh, no, it's like making love." "It takes two." "If you are not going to swim..." "raus!" "I'll move away, then." "I say, Ursula..." "Wouldn't you like me to wait in your tent for you?" "No, Antoine." "It's better if you wait for me in yours!" "And you'll come to me?" "Maybe, probably." "You're no gentleman!" "Neither are you, by the looks of it!" "I don't know you." "But if we only kiss the people we know..." "Shall we go for a walk?" "Ursula..." "What's that?" "It's Maréchal!" "He's there!" "What's he saying?" "Ursula..." "A drop more oil?" "What am I doing here?" "What a night!" "The stammerer!" "The stammerer!" "He's got himself introduced to our sucker." "He'll kill him and nick the car." "Quick, after them!" "In you get." "Did you fiddle with something?" "That's the ignition!" "Go and see what's wrong." "Quick!" "I saw you rummaging about." "Are you taking the mickey?" "What is it?" "Keep it." "Here we go." "Do you know other people here?" "An old diabetic pal I used to do business with." "Well?" "Nobbled." "That villain nobbled our car." "The Cadillac in the Mouse's hands!" "A disaster!" "What the hell!" "I'll warn Maréchal." "I don't care." "I'll warn Maréchal." "Hello." "Pronti, pronta..." "Signorina, I would like to parlare to the automobilo Cadillac." "Let go of me!" "Antoine, can I drive?" "Yes, but be careful." "It's pretty fragile." "Let me show you." "Gently does it..." "That's it." "Bravo!" "You don't know how long it'll be?" "OK, I'll wait." "Grazie, signorina." "What was it?" "Sugar everywhere." "In the carburettor, the fuel tank..." "The swine!" "Come here, you." "Siphon it out." "Go on, get siphoning!" "Go on!" "Hang on, hang on..." "Here we go!" "Go, go, quick!" "The telephone!" "Let me answer it, Antoine." "It's so unusual in a car." "Stop the car, I can't hear." "Ah, miss." "That's just as well." "No!" "Nein!" "I'd rather talk to you." "Ich bin ein Freund." "A friend, a Freund, of Herr Antoine Maréchal." "He ist in danger." "Danger." "So if you nicht intervene..." "Maréchal kaput!" "I'm sorry, I couldn't tell you." "Because the man... the handsome man is a dirty swine." "Ein grosse dirty swine." "And he wants to..." "I beg your pardon." "He wants to stealen the Cadillac." "Ja, save it!" "Ja." "That's it." "Thanks." "I think she got it." "Was that for me?" "No." "For me." "What a view!" "Magnificent!" "That really deserves to be captured on film." "A good idea." "I'll take your photo." "That's nice." "Come on, we'll have our photo taken together." "No, I'll get a bit more sun." "Stock up for the winter." "Go to the bottom of the stairs." "The view's much nicer." "You think so?" "Did you hear the one about the Italian photographer..." "It's beautiful!" "Yes, it's lovely." "I know another joke." "There's this fellow..." "Here we are." "Isn't that lovely?" "Magnificent!" "Give me the camera and stand there." "A bit more to the right." " The right?" " There." "Back a bit." "Your feet aren't in the frame." "More." "More?" "Just a bit further." "This joke's a real cracker..." "Another ten centimetres." "There you are!" "This way." "This is nice of you." "What a... fright!" "Porca miseria!" "Where's Maréchal?" "In the sea, with his girlfriend." "He felt like a swim." "Go and see." "Go and see!" "The silencer." "If you insist." "Thank you." "Prego?" "You swine!" "I'll get you, you see if I don't!" " But, boss..." " Have you finished?" "Look at this!" "It'll shrink now." "Yes, he's swimming with the girl." "With all his clothes on!" "Let's clear off before they get back." "I assure you, he was trying to kill you." "And someone tried to warn me?" "I wonder who it was." "A friend, obviously." "He did the right thing." "What are you doing?" "Oh, I forgot." "I broke your battery." "Why?" "To stop him stealing your lovely car." "Antoine, it grieves me to have to leave you, but, with you, a holiday isn't really a holiday." "I just can't relax." "I'd prefer a car that's not so lovely, but calmer." "Take care, Antoine." "Take great care." "I'll send you a breakdown truck." "Commissaire." "Gentlemen..." "Little crimes lead us to larger ones." "This gentleman is Mario Costa." "His cover is as a head waiter." "Nicked for fencing." "I leaned on him a bit, and he gave up the score of the century." "In two words: gangland and drugs!" "Beirut decided to smuggle to the States the biggest shipment of dope ever." "And that's not all." "They're also bringing in the swag from the Baalbeck hold-up:" "gold, diamonds, rubies..." "Including, apparently, the Yu-Kun-Kun!" "The diamond all the papers talked about when it was nicked?" "Yes." "The whole lot in one car." "Which car?" "And they'll come this way?" "According to our information, there's a good chance." "We can't take every car apart, so it's down to faces." "And these are the faces." "The villains." "A handsome bunch, eh?" "He's never been collared, but my bet is, he's behind the whole thing." "We'll cross the border first and wait on the other side." "Try your headlights." " Are they working?" " The horn." "That's the third time now!" "Must be a short-circuit." "I'll get it looked at." "How much, then?" "Twenty thousand lire, say." "Twenty thousand..." "What do I do with that?" "That one?" "It's no good now." "No good?" "Arrivederci, then!" "What a weight!" " Passports, please." " Here." " Park over there." " I'm in a hurry." "Don't argue." "Just park." "Anything to declare?" "I'm in a hurry." "Just do as you're told." "Over there." "Look!" "He's stabbing..." "I will not allow this!" "Have you about finished?" "What a fuss!" "But you've had us here now for two hours." "So?" "What do you want?" "It's unpardonable!" "They've got their eyes on us." "If Maréchal shows up, we've had it." "Had it!" "Had it!" " There's nothing, sir." " Thank you." " I'm sorry..." " That's all right." "Sorry I can't nick you!" "You can't talk to me like that!" " Shut it!" " Good Lord!" "Clear off!" "Go on, beat it!" "Excuse me, commissaire." "Finished, gentlemen." "Come here, both of you." "Maréchal!" "There, sir, all done." "Where's he got to?" "What's his name?" "Saro..." "Saroyan." "Mr. Saroyan!" "Oh, the bloody idiots!" "Mr. Saroyan!" "What are you doing here?" "How nice to see you!" "If you only knew..." "I've got so many things to tell you." "I'm sorry, sir, but I haven't had the pleasure..." " Are you joking?" " Not at all." "Maréchal." " That's not my name." " No, it's mine!" "The car..." "That's quite enough!" "Don't insist!" "You must be right." "Sorry, sir." "I must be mistaken." "Hey, you!" " Me?" " Yes." "Park over there." "I thought I'd told you to beat it!" "How dare you speak..." "Shut it!" "Get out of here!" "Your papers, please." "Thank you." "That idiot Maréchal!" "Talking to me in front of the commissaire." "They'll find everything." "The dope's already gone." "What about the rest?" "Duschmurtz will skin me alive!" "Do we go?" "No, keep watching." "And the wings?" "We're checking them now, sir." "It's not gold." "Just metal." "No jewels in the battery, sir." "No dope in the wings, sir." "And no Yu-Kun-Kun either." "The famous diamond?" "Well, well!" "Don't get all clever with me." "Tell me about Mr. Saroyan." " Do you know him well?" " No." "I thought I did." "Go on, off you go!" "Here he comes, boss." " Where?" " There!" "He got through." "We're saved!" "He never ceases to amaze me!" "No, not the green one." "He knows it now." "What do we do?" "Over there." "Yes." "Excuse me." "We're being watched!" " Where?" " There!" "And don't drive too fast!" "If sir would care to?" "It's not gold." "Just metal." "No jewels in the battery, sir." "I'm sorry, sir, but I haven't had the pleasure..." "Changed your car, have you..." "Mr. Saroyan?" "You really took me for a sucker, didn't you?" "Well, I'll drive your Cadillac to Bordeaux for you." "But, on the way, we'll go and see my friends in Carcassonne." "Go on!" "Quick, quick!" "Quick, quick!" "All right!" "Cooee!" "It's me again!" "What's that?" "Are you coming?" "End of the line, everybody out!" "Give me the keys and say your prayers." "Cool it!" "You tried to sink me, but I can swim." "You want to waste me now?" "Move away, or I'll hurt you." "Don't make me laugh." "My lips are chapped." "You moron!" "Check this out..." "Hollow." "A hero, but no heroin." "Move your carcass, will you?" "Look here." "The battery." "Take a gander." "Sweet FA!" "The bumpers..." "That's not gold, just metal." "I didn't know you were in on it." "You loser!" "Haven't you got it yet?" "This car's just a dummy." "The Yu-Kun-Kun?" "It's with all the rest." "In the old Rolls." "Underneath." "Now give me the keys back." "If you're in it with Saroyan, why are you shopping him?" "Let's just say he hasn't played fair with me." "BROKEN DOWN" "There!" "Breakfast, gentlemen?" "Three coffees." " No sugar!" " Very well." "May I?" "A diagram, signed by Saroyan." "A piece of cake!" "Is there a Mr. Saroyan here?" " What was that?" " Saroyan." "Saroyan?" "Why?" "He's wanted on the phone." "On the phone?" "Where?" "Inside." "Saroyan." " Follow me." " This way?" "Sa-Sa-Saroyan?" "The stammerer!" "What do you want, you swine?" "Fifty-fifty." "Not a chance!" "Think about it un poco." "I've just thought of something." "Maybe we can discuss this." "On the ramparts, maybe?" "We wouldn't be disturbed." "All right." "I'll make my presence known by whistling" "Plaisir d'Amour..." "But come alone." "Otherwise..." "What fun!" "Get me 1817, please, miss." "Hello, is that Martial?" "Antoine here." "Where are you?" "In Paris?" "No, in Carcassonne." "I've just got here." "Come round for lunch." "No, thanks." "I'm calling about a serious matter." "You need me?" "Yes." "Listen..." "Is the gate behind the Rue des Fossés Verts still there?" "Then here's what you can do..." "Chagrin of love lasts a whole life long..." "Your friend wants you on the phone." "I'll go." "Hurry up." " What?" " The boss is in danger." " Where?" " 80 Rue des Fossés Verts." "Welcome, gentlemen!" "Suzanne, were there three men here earlier?" "Yes, Mr. Antoine." "Good." "Well, the smallest, the one who talks... like that, will be back." "Tell him he can't count on his pals any more, and give him this." " It'll amuse him greatly." " Very well, Mr. Antoine." "The Italian has got reinforcements." "We'll catch them all in the same trap." " What can I get you?" " Beer." " And you, sir?" " Beer." "Where have they got to?" "Sir, I was given this for you." "What is this?" "What is this?" "Commissaire!" "Shut it!" "Let's go." "But you're humiliating me, you're humiliating me." "Yes." "Get inside." "The stammerer!" "Now collar Maréchal and get to the police station in Bordeaux." "And careful with the Cadillac!" "Those idiots aren't coming." "Nice one, son!" "Can you can that damn horn!" "Can you can?" "Yes, you can can..." "Like Yu-Kun-Kun!" "Gentlemen, here's the Yu-Kun-Kun." "He never ceases to amaze me!" " Take him away." " Me?" "Commissaire, I give you my word he has nothing to do with this." "You'd better keep your trap shut!" "Everyone to the station!" "No, not me!" "While I've got you to myself..." "You've got me in a right pickle, haven't you?" "But I'll get you out, I guarantee." "I'm not worried." "I'm innocent." "Anyway, I don't hold it against you because..." "What a trip!" "And that's important in a man's life." "No, they can't hear us." "You'll get the hundred million." "Hundred million?" "The insurance reward for the Yu-Kun-Kun." "The Yu-Kun-Kun." "You found it!" " There are witnesses." " Lots of them." "So you'll get the reward of a hundred million." "So I'm more an "I-Can-Can" than a Yu-Kun-Kun!" "But listen..." "The hundred million..." "What will you do with it?" "I don't know." "I haven't thought." "Listen, listen!" "Do you trust me?" "You can trust me." "You do trust me, don't you?" "Yes." "Can you make money like that?" "Subtitles by Howard Bonsor" "Subtitling by TVS" " TITRA FILM"