"♪ A little bit of love is a luxury" "♪ That's what people say" "♪ And girls just long for a little bit" "♪ Of love a1 the close of day" "♪ Now, there's nothing like a little bit of loving" "♪ If you take 'rt in a quiet sort of way" "♪ So just take my tip, if you're going for a trip" "♪ Never mind what people say" "♪ A little of what you like... ♪ I like, we all like" "♪ It never does you any harm" "♪ And a little of what you like" "♪ ls bound to do you good" "♪ And if you ever stayed the night ,boys" "♪ I bet you would holler, you would" "♪ That love is a funny feeling" "♪ Feeling comes a-stealing" "♪ It makes the girls all love a man" "♪ And there's no use denying, what is the use of lying?" "♪ That you like what I like, a little love now and then" "(Applause)" "Ladies and gentlemen, the Queen of the Music Halls, Miss Marie Lloyd!" "(Applause) ls everybody hBPPW" "You bet your life we are!" "(Marie giggles)" "(Bell tolls)" "(Whispers) Stand up straight." "Ad sad." "Oh, dear child." " How much?" " Two shillings." "Let's go buy some sweets, Tilly." "No, Freddie." "I've got a better idea." "(Applause from within)" " Go on, you've got five minutes." "(Fairy music)" " That's Little Titch, for obvious reasons." " (Giggles)" "You hereto audition?" "MAN:" "Next!" "That's you, isn't it?" "Yeah, I suppose." "This your first time?" "Me?" "You've never been on stage before, have you?" "Course I have." "(Floorboards creek)" " Bloody hell!" " Name?" "Beg pardon?" "Name?" "Name!" "Not that difficutt, is it?" "No, I just happen to have not quite heard." "Miss Bella Delamare." "Illuminate my day with the lightness of your voice, little miss songbird." "Beg pardon?" "Sing." "Sing!" "Sing!" "(Piano intro)" "♪ The boy I love is up in the gallery" "♪ The boy I love is waving down at me rThemheiacanfiyousee?" "♪ Waving his handerchief" "♪ As merry as a robin that sings on a tree" "Thank you!" " Thank you for what?" " Thank you for coming." "Good day." "Next!" "(Horse whinnies)" "Well?" "Well, come on, Till." "Tell me." " How did you get on?" " They loved me." "Well, who wouldn't, eh?" "I just weren't what they were looking for." "Look, they're so used to the chaff that..." " that when the wheat turns up..." " Maybe I'm not as good as you think I am." "I should slick to curling feathers." "Oi!" "You never give up." "As your best pal, I'm telling you." "You give up, you've failed." "Two shillings and sixpence?" " Take 'rt or leave it." " I'd have to leave it, Mr Belafonte." "How dare you just walk out and leave me shortof a gin?" "Two and six is more than enough for you to be standing on a stage" " and hoofing abouta bit!" " Goon!" "(Posh voice) Excuse me!" "Mr Belafonte!" "What?" "I've seen the Dolly Sisters' ad." "I know what they do." "So?" "I beg your pardon." "Miss Bella Delamare at your service." "I'm a dancer." "Now, it's not normally in my nature to talk disrespectful of my fellow artistes..." "What are you going on about?" "(Cockney accent) I'll bloody do 'rt for 2% bob!" "You've just found yourself your missing Dolly Sister!" "♪ I was proposed to by Obadiah Biggs" "♪ In a very gentlemanly way" "♪ I lent him all me money so that he could buy the ring" "♪ Pundually at twelve o'clock today" "♪ There was I, waiting at the church" "♪ Waiting at the church, waiting at the church" "♪ When I found he'd lefl me in the lurch" "♪ Lor' how 'rt did upset me!" "♪ All at once, he sent me round a note" "♪ Here's the very note and this is what he wmte" "♪ He said, I can't get away to marry you today" "♪ My Wife?" "..won't let me!" "(Laughter)" "♪ There was I, waiting at the church" "♪ Waiting at the church, waiting at the church" "♪ When I found he'd lefl me in the lurch" "♪ Lor' how it does upset me!" "0oh!" "♪ All at once, he sent me round a note" "♪ Here's the very note, and this is what he wmte" "♪ He said, I can't get away to marry you today - (Riotous laughter)" "♪ My wife won't let me" "(cheering)" "(Shouts for encore)" "(Laughter and continued applause)" " You little cow!" " What did I do?" "You stole the limelight when you're part of the chorus." "It's not on." "When you're pan of the chorus, you play your pan just like everyone else." "Well, I don't want to be like everyone else!" " Didn't let you down, did I, sir?" " What?" "Er...no, 'rt was fine." "FREDDIE:" "You were brilliant" " Did you hear them all laughing?" " All eyes were on you." "Who wants to play the bridesmaid when you can play the bride?" " You were certainly the belle of the ball." " Ignore him." "I'm Percy Courtney." "Are you, indeed?" "And I just wondered if the belle of the ball would care for a little refreshment after such exertions?" "Have you been dancing on the halls for long, Miss Delamare?" "No, Mr Courtney." "I'm a novice." "I'd like to make a career out of it, but it's not easy." "You need to know the right people." "Like you, I suppose?" "And what do you do, Mr Courtney?" "My profession?" "Well, you're no drayman, are you, by the looks of those hands." "I invest on the market." " What, fruit and veg?" " (Chuckles)" "Stocks and shares." "You think I'm the type of gill that'll fall for a single rose?" "♪ The boy I love is up in the gallery" "♪ The boy I love" "♪ ls waving down at me" "♪ There he is..." "She's got something." "Really'?" "Damned if I can see it." "♪ "merry as a robin that sings on a tree" "Thank you." "MAN:" "Waiter!" "What do you think to the place?" "It's lovely here, innit?" "It is tonight Here... with you." "Flatterer." "♪ There he is, can'!" "you see?" "♪ Waving his handkerchief..." "She's got wit." "A sparkle." "♪ ..that sings on a tree" "Give her five minutes on Monday night." "(Scattered applause)" "I'm glad you agreed to see me again, Miss Delamare." "I hope to see you a lot more often." " No, you wont" " Oh." " But you can see Miss Tilly Wood, if you like." " Tilly who?" "Bella Delamare's my stage name." "I made 'rt up." "Nice, though, don'!" "you think?" "It's sophisticated." "You should call yourself something more..." " ..memorable." " Like what?" " Something simple." " Charmed, I'm sure." "Well, I ain't having Tilly Wood." " Why not?" " She's far too common, isn't she?" "What name would you suggest?" "What about Marie?" "What about Mar-ee?" "Mane." "Yeah." "Marie what?" "♪ And amongst the boys We got myself a lover" "♪ And since i got a lover" "♪ Why, I don't care a fig" "♪ Cos the boy I love is up in the gallery" "♪ The boy I love is waving down at me" "♪ There he is, can'!" "you see?" "♪ Waving his handerchief" "♪ As merry as a robin that sings on a tree" "(Cheering, shouts for encore)" "More!" "(Giggles)" "No-one's ever given me a rose before, Freddie." "STAGE MANAGER Two-minute call, everyone." "So...it's Marie Lloyd now, is it?" "Yep, and don'!" "she sing nice?" "I'll give you ten shillings a performance and a regular spot." "Monday night." "I think you've missed the boat." "I'm already booked on a Monday." " At the Royalty in Bethnal Green." " Shawcross?" " How much is he paying you?" " Twelve shillings and sixpenoe." "I'll give you thirteen." "I don'!" "think she can let Mr Shawcros down." "He's a very important man." "Fifteen shillings and sixpenoe." "Done." "Magnificent!" "Clever gin." "You shouldn'!" "be allowed." "WOMAN:" "Them she is" "Miss Man's Lloyd of London." "A common thief!" " Who are you?" " That song." " It's mine." " Which song?" "The only song in your act worth singing." "The Boy In The Gallery." " I own the rights." " Oh..." "I had no idea." "I bought the words and music from Hoxlon Market." "You can't just go and sing somebody else's material." "What did you pay for it?" "Two, three pounds?" "(Sooffs) For a song like that?" "You need to keep up with the times, young man." "That's a five-pound song." "Thank you." "I am slightly mollified." "Never say Miss Nelly Powers, songbird with a light comic patter, doesn't want to help those lower down the bill than hersetf." "I'm sure." "♪ When I Take My Morning Promenade" "That's your lot." "We'll take all six" "That'll be £18, Sir." "Thank you. (Giggl)" "MARIE: (Off-key) ♪ ..my morning promenade" "♪ Quite a fashion card on the promenade" "♪ Now, I don'!" "mind nice boys staling hard" "♪ If 'rt satisfies their desire" "♪ Do you think my dress is a little bit" "♪ Just a little bit" "♪ Nome much of 'a" "♪ And if 'rt shows my shape just a little bit" "♪ That's the little bit the boys admire" "It's very good." " Really?" " Mm." "Perl?" " Good." " You didn't like it?" "It just needs to feel more..." "You didn't like it" "You didn'!" "seem...relaxed." "It was good." "It was good." "You just need to give...more." "Give more?" "What does 'give more' mean?" "You need to let the audience know thai you're enjoying yourself." "FREDDIE:" "You need to ﬂirt with them." "And then, well, they can enjoy themselves." "Yeah." "(Applause)" "♪ Since Mother Eve in the garden long ago" "♪ Started a fashion, fashion's been a passion" "♪ Eve wore a costume we might describe as brief" "♪ Still, every season brought a change of leaf" "♪ She'd stare if she could come to town" "♪ Now, what would Mother Eve think of my new Parisian gown?" "♪ When I take my morning promenade" "♪ Quite a fashion card, on the promenade" "♪ Now, I don'!" "mind nice boys staling hard" "♪ If 'rt satisfies their desire" "♪ Do you think my dress is a little bit" "♪ Just a little bit" "♪ Not too much of it!" "♪ And if 'rt shows my shape just a little bit" "♪ That's the little bit the boys admire" "♪ Fancy the gins in the prehislolic days" "♪ Each wore a bearskin to cover up their fair skin" "♪ Lately Salome has charmed us, to be sure" "♪ Wearing just a row of beads and not much more" "Fancy me dressing like that too!" "♪ I'm sure the Daily Mirror man would love an interview" "♪ When I take my morning promenade" "♪ Quite a fashion card, on the promenade" "♪ Now, I don'!" "mind nice boys staling hard" "♪ If 'rt satisfies their desire" "♪ Do you think my dress is a little bit" "♪ Just a little bit" "♪ Not too much of it!" "♪ And if 'rt shows my shape just a little bit" "♪ That's the little bit the boys admire" "(Cheering and applause)" "'Marie Lloyd has an exceptionally quick ear for both pitch and rhythm'?" "Let me see, Perce." "Perce!" "(Giggles)" "'Her step dancing is perfectly punduated with revealing displays of silk drawers, frilled below the knees." "She is much appreciated by both sexes.'" "You're being admired, Tilly." "It's Marie." "Tilly's dead." "They like me, don't they, Perce?" "One day I want to be top of the bill, Friday and Saturday nights." "I think they love me." "Who could blame them?" "So, Mr Percy Courtney... where do we go from here?" "(Marie moans ecstatically)" "It's your fault." "What are we going to do?" "My father used to say, 'Where there's a problem, there's a solution.'" "Gills have died doing that!" "I've heard." "Don't think I haven't." "Well, maybe that wasn't the solution I had in mind." "What are you staring at?" " You." " Why, what's wrong with me?" "Nothing." "You're beautiful." "Make a wish and blow." "You'll say yes, won't you?" "What's up with w"?" "Nothing's up with me." "Except... (Giggles)" "It's a big thing, ain't it, getting married?" "Oh, my God!" "Are you sure?" "Course I'm sure!" "Ain't you going to congratulate me?" " I dunno." " Why not?" "You tell me." "I'm marrying him because I want to." "It's as simple as that" "Mr Percy Courtney." "I love him!" "(Giggles)" " That's all that matters, then." " Yep." "Congratulations." "Come here!" "Look." "Ain't 'rt lovely?" "Gorgeous;!" "♪ Now I never was a one to go and skimp myself" "♪ Cos if I likes a thing, I likes it, thats enough" "♪ But there's lots of people y that if you likes a thing a lot" "♪ It'll grow on you and all that sort of stuff" "♪ Now, I like me drop of stout as well as anyone..." "The bride and groom!" "♪ Don'!" "you know it's supposed to make you fat?" "♪ And there's many a la-di-da-di madam who wouldni due to touch it" "♪ Cos she says it spoils her figure, the silly cat" "♪ Well, I always hold with having it if you fancy it" "♪ If you fancy it" "♪ That's understood" "♪ And suppose it makes you fat?" "♪ I don't worry over that" "♪ Cos a little of what you fency does you good" "♪ Now, once a year I likes a little holiday...ah!" "♪ And we always have one, my old man and me" "♪ But the last time that we had one" "♪ He sprung up a new idea" "♪ When he saw the ladi bathing in the sea" "(Wotf whistle)" "♪ He says, Now what a man requires is a change in everything" "♪ And how he ought to take his holidays alone" "♪ You know, away from everyday affairs" "♪ Very likely, if you want a little fortnight on your own" "Ha!" "♪ Well, I always hold with having 'rt if you fancy 'rt" "♪ If you fancy 'rt" "♪ That's understood" "♪ But if that's your blooming game" "♪ I intend to do the same" "♪ Cos a little of what you fancy does you good" "♪ And suppose 'rt makes you fat" "♪ I don't worry over that" "♪ Cos a little of what you fancy does you good" "You can't sing that to her." "She fell asleep after the first verse." "I'm sending my audience to sleep." "(Giggles)" "Ah, look." "I think she's got my nose." "Oh, Percy, you shouldn't even joke about things like that." "You cheeky... (Giggles) Sshh!" "♪ If that's your blooming game, I intend to do the same" "♪ Cos a little of what you fency does you good" "♪ But if that's your blooming game" "♪ I intend to do the same" "♪ Cos a little of what you fancy does you good" "(Applause)" "(Applause)" "♪ If I could pick up the Hackney Road and put 'rt over there" "♪ I'd like to live in Pan's all the time" "♪ I'd like to live in Pan's all the time" "(cheering)" "I'd better go." "No, no, no, no." "Just one last song." "Marie, I've booked a table at Romanov's." "Come on." " Come on, one last song." " Come on!" "One more, norm on." "Just one last song." " (Cheers of approval)" " You go ahead, I won't be long." "Same again for everyone?" "♪ Every little movement has a meaning of its own" "♪ Every little movement tells a tale" "♪ And when she walks in dainty hobbies... (Woman giggles)" "♪ As I walk along the Bois de Boulogne with an independent air" "♪ You can hear the gins declare" "♪ He must be a millionaire!" "♪ You can hear them sigh and wish to die" "♪ You can see them wink the other eye" "♪ At the man who broke the bank at Monte Carto" "♪ As I walk along the Bois de Boulogne with an independent air" "♪ You can hear the gins declare" "♪ He must be a millionaire!" "♪ You can hear them sigh and wish to die" "♪ You can see them wink the other eye" "♪ At the man who broke the bank at Monte Carto" "(Door opens) MAID:" "Good evening, sir." " Good evening, madam." " Hello, Daisy." "(Footsteps on stairs)" "Where've you been?" "I waited for you." "I couldn't get away." "One song turned into another." "You know how 'rt is." "Gardenias?" "What are you smelling of perfume for?" "Do I?" "Yeah, you do." "I'm tired." "I don'!" "care if you're tired." "Where have you been, Percy?" "Nowhere." " Then why do you reek like..." " I can goout if I want, can't I?" "A few drinks at a gentleman's club." "That's what gentlemen do." " When I'm paying for it?" " Oh, well, lucky me." "The famous Marie Lloyd pays for me to dine alone." " Don't talk to me like that." " Shut up." "I can talk to you any way I want." " No, you wont" " I said, shut it!" "I'm your husband." "Show me some respect." "There's no excuse for it." "Ain't there?" "No, there ain't." "I'm in charge." "Now..." "Let's go to bed." "I'm tired." "♪ A little bit of love is a luxury" "♪ That's what people say" "♪ And girls just want a little bit of love" "♪ At the close of day" "♪ Now, there's nothing like a little bit of loving" "♪ If you take it in a quiet sort of way" "♪ So just take my tip" "♪ If you're asking for a bit" "♪ Never mind what people say" "♪ So just take my tip" "♪ If you're asking for a bit..." "Your usual table, Mr Lloyd?" "Courtney." "The name is Courtney." "Usual table." "(Soft piano music)" "We fit in perfectly, don't we, Marie?" "No-one would think you were common, would they?" "Let's not cause a scene in public." "Where's Freddie?" "He's not coming." "Why not?" "Because I thought we would have a night on our own." "Would you be so kind, Miss Lloyd?" "Of course." "Can we not have one meal without being followed by swarms of Marie Lloyd admirers?" " Thank you." " You're welcome." "♪ Now there's nothing like a little bit of loving" "♪If you take it in a quiet sort of way" "♪ So just take my tip" "♪ If you're asking for a bit" "♪ Never mind what people say" "♪ So just take my tip" "♪ If you're asking for a bit" "♪ Never mind what people say" "Tell me you love me, Freddie." "(sighs)" "I love you." "Then stop looking so croos." "I don't want you going on stage drunk." "I've got a natural tolerance to champagne." "I was born to bathe in the stuff." " If he makes you unhappy..." " I don't deserve to be unhappy, do I, Freddie?" "I'm not unhappy." "I'm happy." "I'm as happy as happy as happy" "Good." "(Fairy music)" "(Applause)" "(Laughter)" "Hello, Mother." "Don'!" "you 'Hello, Mother' me." "Where have you been, daughter?" "I've been peeping." "Peeping?" "And what have you been peeping at, pray?" " As if we didn't know!" "(Honk)" "(Laughter)" "I've been a-peeping at Little Boy Blue." "And why have you been doing thai Daughter?" "Cos I'm Little Bo Peep, and every day a-peeping I must go!" "Ooh, naughty, naughty!" "(Laughter)" "I don't like 'rt here, Mother." "It's far too cold." "(Cymbms dash)" " Ooh!" "What a terrible draught!" "I don't know where it's coming from, but I know where it's going. (Chuckles)" "Say hello to your grandmother, Daughter." "MY." "What big eyes you've got Grandmother." "All the better to see you with, my child." "(Laughter)" "My, what big ears you've got, Grandmother." "Al!" "the better to hear you with, my child." "My, what a big tongue you've got, Grandmother!" "All the better to eat you with, my dear!" "(Marie screams)" "(Lively piano)" "(screams)" "(Piano ﬂourish)" "MY hem!" "Oh, my beloved!" "MOTHER GOOSE:" "Oh, my goodness!" "(Laughter)" "Fifty pounds?" "Christ, what's he been buying, the crown jewels?" "Hats, shoes, jewellery, underwear." "Your husband knows how to spend, Miss Lloyd." " Swan and Lilly?" "That's a ladies' outfitters!" " Very select." "So many pairs of silk stockings." "Finest silk." "Only the best for Mr Courtney, ma'am." "But these bills do need settling." "Right" "Follow me." "Here you are." "There's his suits, for starters." "And here are his shirts." "And here are his scarves, and down there are his shoes." "And over here are his diamond tie pins and cufflinks." "If that don't cover it, he'll be home some time in the morning." "I suggest you collar him for yourself." "For a man with such fine taste, he always com home smelling of cheap perfume." "One other thing." "Would you mind?" "Oh." " For the missus." " Yeah, of course." "It's er..." "Queenie." " Much obliged." " Pleasure." "(Drunken laughter)" "♪ I'm Burlington Bertie" "♪ I rise at ten-thirty" "♪ And Buckingham Palace I view" "♪ I stand in the yard" "♪ While they're changing the guard" "♪ And the Queen shouts across, Toodle-oo!" "♪ The Prince of Wales' brother" "♪ Along with some other" "♪ Slaps me on the back and says" "♪ Come and see Mother" "♪ But I'm Bert, Bert" "♪ And royalty hurt" "♪ When they ask me to dine, I say no" "♪ I've just had a banana with Lady Diana" "♪ I'm Burlington Bertie from Bow" "♪ I'm Burlington Bertie from Bow" "♪ Burlington Bertie from Bow" "(Knocking)" "PERCY"." "I love you." "I've only ever loved you." "Leta start again." "Another chance." "Look, I've been seeing someone tonight who n make you a real star." " I am a real star." " Yeah, but only in this country." " I'm talking about the world." " It's all right, darling." "Percy, go away." "It's all right, sweetheart." "(Banging) - open the door!" " It's all right, daﬂing." "OK." "(Banging continues)" "MARIE:" "Please, boys, let me through." "Come on, please." "We've got a show to do." "(Clamouling)" "The public wants to know." "The public has a right to know, Miss Lloyd." "Leave the lady alone." "We've got a show to do." "When are you going to be divorced, Miss Lloyd?" "(Applause)" "(Applause)" "I can'!" "do it, Dan." "Not tonight" " Course you can." " You must, Marie." "How can I go on stage and entertain when they've read about me in the papers?" "So what's the great Marie Lloyd going to do?" "Run away and hide?" "Show them nothing can hurt you." "When they see you've stopped smiling- they'll stop smiling." "Go on, Marie." "(Applause)" "Ladies and gentlemen," "I give you your own, your vary own, the one and only..." "Mss Marie Lloyd!" "(Applause)" "ls everybody happy?" "I said, is everybody happy?" "(Silence)" "I know what you're thinking." "'Ain't 'rt shocking?" "Ain't he a devil?" "How can he do this to our Marie when she's...such a lady?" "'" "(Ribald cheers)" "Well, there's only one thing I've got to say to my husband, Mr Percy Courtney, and 'rt goes like this." "(Orchestra starts up)" "♪ Hold your hand out, naughty boy" "♪ Hold your hand out, naughty boy" "♪ Last night, in the pale moonlight" "♪ I saw you" "♪ With a nice gill in the park" "♪ You were strolling full of joy" "♪ And you told me you'd never kissed a gin before" "♪ Hold your hand out, naughty boy" "(Refined accent) Milk or cream?" "Cream. (Sighs)" " (Refined) Sugar?" " Stop playing daft." "It's you who's being daft, dragging our names through the dirt." "Yeah, you love the publicity." "Not this son." "(Refined) Biscuit?" " No." " Please yourself, I'm sure." "Look, Marie..." "I need you." "Why do you need me, Percy?" " Because I..." " Well?" "1 just do." "Well, give me one good reason." "(Percy sighs) Look, you know I love you." "Oh, do I?" "Of course I do." "I married you, didn't I?" "And we know why, don'!" "we?" "Cos I was your big investment" "Yeah, well, I've got nothing, Mane." "Nothing." "Want to know why you've got nothing, Percy Courtney?" " He's got no money cos he gambled 'rt all away." " Shut it!" "For a short time, though, you were lucky." "You had a winning smile and a winning hand." "Marie, please." "What am I going to do?" "Marie, help me." "I don't give a raspberry tart." "Raspberry tart?" "Fart!" "Good Lord!" "Without me, you'd be nothing." "No." "Without me, you are nothing." "Some people have little or no decorum." "I've got bloody decorum." "♪ And you told me you'd never kissed a girl before" "♪ Hold your hand out, naughty boy" "(Applause)" "MRS CHANT:" "Purity not filth!" "She has taken music hall to a new low." "And to hear her talk of nothing but kissing and hugging and... and tipping the wink is nothing short of fitth." "She is a strumpet!" "She is an entertainer, and uses the milieu..." "She has taken music hall to a new low, and in a Christian country, we must make a stand." "WOMAN:" "There she is!" "A Christian country, Miss Lloyd, with morals and..." "I don't give a damn what you and your high-and-mighty ladies of society say about me." "In fad, keep on saying what you want, because the more things you say, the fuller the houses are." "I think they're jealous." "Their husbands obviously prefer you to them." "(Sighs with exasperation)" "(Bawdy cheering)" "(Cheers increase in volume)" "(Mock fanfare)" "(Orchestra plays bawdy rendition of Rule Britannia)" "I shall have the last laugh, Mr Belafonte, when I close your music hall down." "(Onstage) ♪ Oh, Mr Porter" "The Vigilance Committee, Marie." "Mrs Chant has taken her case to the Vigilance Committee." "So?" "If they rule that your ad is immoral, they could close my hall down." "Immoral?" "What on earth do you mean?" " Lewd." " (Gasps in mock horror)" "Mr Belafonte." "I've never had a lewd thought in my life." "You'll do your best to convince them otherwise, won't you, Marie?" "Promise?" "I might" "♪ ..as quickly as you can" "♪ Oh, Mr Porter, whata silly girl I am" "(Footsteps approaching)" "Terribly sorry I'm late, gentlemen." "Oh, Mrs Chant." "Good day to you." "COUNCILLOR:" "Mss Lloyd." "How can I be of assistance?" "As you know, Miss Lloyd, your lyrics are causing a stir, and we have had complaints." "Really?" "I can'!" "think why." "Would it be possible for you to tell me which particular lyric is causing of fence?" "I merely aim to entertain, not to offend." "Most of them." "Pray tell, Mrs Chant." "Specifics." "Well, what's that A Little Of What You Fancy supposed to be about?" "It's always been a belief of mine that a little bit, not too much, of what one fancies is a good thing." "My dear mother, for example, loves a dandelion and burdock, but I don't advise her to drink 'rt by the gallon." "Very laudable." "Please submit your song lyrics." "Here." "'Do you think my dress is just a little bit'?" "People like to see a fine gown on a woman." "Don'!" "they?" "Er...quile." "There is the question of you showing off your..." "My drawers?" "In red, while and blue." "It was the King's birthday." "It was a special occasion." "Very pailioiic, I'm sure." " It won't happen again." " I hope not." "'She sits amongst the cabbages and peas'?" "An innocent song about a lady who sits in her vegetable garden." "How can 'rt be anything more than that?" "I think you know, Miss Lloyd." "So do you suggest that I change the particular vegetable selected?" " Well, I suppose that's..." " One good substitute." " Yes." " Very well." "She sits amongst the oabbag and..." "leeks?" " Miss Lloyd!" " What?" "(Chuckles, then coughs)" "And there's the nub of it, gentlemen." "Perhaps it's in the imagination of the audience and not in the imemion of the performer." "Thank you, Miss Lloyd." "You'll be informed of the commilieds verdict." "Thank you, gentlemen." "I'm sure you'll pass the right motion." "♪ Up to the West End" "♪ Right in the best end" "♪ Straight from the country came Miss Maudie Brown" "♪ Father a curate" "♪ But couldn't endure 'rt" "♪ That's why the lady's residing in town" "♪ 12 momhs ago her modest self fell quile sublime" "♪ To sit on a fella's knee who's been in all the grime" "♪ If you should want a kiss" "♪ She'd droop her eyes like this" "♪ But now she droops them just one at a time" "♪ And every little movement has a meaning of its own" "♪ Every little movement tells a tale" "♪ And when she walks in dainty hobbies" "♪ At the back around here" "♪ There's a kind of wibble-wobble" "♪ And she glides like this" "♪ And the Johnnies follow in her trail" "♪ Cos when she turns her head like so" "♪ Something's going, don'!" "you know?" "♪ Every little movement tells a tale" "♪ Cos when she turns her head like so" "♪ Something's going, don'!" "you know?" "♪ Every little movement tells a tale" "(Enthusiastic cheering)" "Evening, sir." "All on your own tonight'?" "All the lovely ladies to yourself, then." "You should be ashamed of yourself, charging a shilling to peep at these girls." " Who's 'rt harming?" " Well, 'rt ain't harming your pocket!" " You do well enough out of me." " But they don't." "Hardly enough to feed their children." " If they don't like it..." " No wonder there's talk of strikes." "Here you are. aids" "Have a drink on me this evening, all right?" " Thank you." " All right, darling." "Marie Lloyd to the rescue again." "Get these people out of here, Freddie." "FREDDIE:" "Come on, you lot Haven't you got homes lb go to?" "You're not frightened of anyone, are you?" "Well, I'm not frightened of Belafonte." "But I am scared that you're not going to invite me over the road for a drink." "How about...tonight?" "Or maybe we should be getting home?" "Or maybe you should be minding your own business." "I'd be delighted, Mr Huriey." "(Giggles)" " I'm only thinking of you." " You're not my moral guardian." "I hate 'rt when you're in one of these moods." "You hate me?" " Your moods." " What moods?" "When you're the only person in the wortd that matters." "What are you doing here, Freddie?" " Sorting out your clothes." " You're here because I employ you." "That's what you're doing here." " I've spent my whole life looking after you." " That's a lie." "Be quiet." "No, I've spent my whole life looking after you." " You don't want me to be happy." " I don't want you to make a mistake." "Well, go, then." "I don'!" "need you." "You do." "How dare you think I need you!" "You want me to go?" "Yes." "Go." "(Door slams)" "♪ She's my lady love" "♪ She is my dove, my baby doll" "♪ She's no gin for silting down to dream" "♪ She's the only queen Laguna knows" "♪ I know she likes me" "♪ I know she likes me" "♪ Because she said so" "♪ She is the Lily of Laguna" "♪ She is my lily and my rose" "(Cheering and applause)" "You meant what you were singing, didn't you, Alec?" "I did." "I could tell." "There was a sparkle in them eyes, and 'rt weren't caused by the stage lamps, was it?" "No." "What caused it?" "You know what caused it." "You did." "As always." "The things you say." "Really'?" "(Sighs heavily)" "What's up, Alec?" "You make me shiver when you hold my hand." "(Giggles)" "You need a pair of gloves, darting." "I'll buy you some from Simpson's." "I don't need gloves to keep me warm." "What do you need?" "NaUQW" " You're an old rooster, ain't you?" " (Chuckles)" "Old faithful, more like." "I could do with some of that right now." "Me too." "Percy Courtney said he would love me forever." "Don'!" "let me down, Alec, eh?" "Never." "I'm sure we can come to an amicable arrangememt, Miss Lloyd." "Why must 'rt be amicable?" "I'll give him £2,000 for three years." "Miss Lloyd, these matters are complicated." "There's the issue of custody." "The house." "Those are my terms." "Take 'rt or leave it." "Miss Lloyd, please." "Stay." "I'll take it." "SOLICITOR:" "Oh." "Good day, sir." " She looks old." " Yes." "And fat" "Still...nothing lasts forever, does it?" "(Clears throat)" "Marie Lloyd does 'rt again." "Oh!" "I love these slippers." "(Marie laughs) Oh, Alec, you are funny!" "How can anyone love slippers?" "I don'!" "know." "I just do." "They feel light" "Just like you and me in this house together." " That feels right too." " Yeah." "We're going to have a lovely little life together." "Lillie?" "Where's me champagne?" "I thought this morning - tea." " Tea's for old ladies." " We're not getting any younger." "Alec, you were born a hundred." "(Chuckles)" "We could walk on the heath today." "I thought we could work on a double ad." "Eat your egg" "PROTESTORS:" "Fair deal for artists!" "Fair deal for artists!" "Fair deal for artists!" "Fair deal for artists!" "MAME"." "I want the world to know that I'm vlith you people." "They can bully you, but they can't bully me." "So together we shall be indestructible." "Fair deal for artists!" "Fair deal for artists!" "What does Marie think she's doing, Alec?" " She won't be talked out of it." " You know this strike's spreading." "Two more halls in Shoreditch have gone dark." "She'll drive us all out of business." " I know, sir." "But..." " What kind of man are you?" "She's your wife." "Tell her!" "Make her obey you!" "He's blaming me for not controlling you." "(Laughs)" "What does he think I am, your dog?" "I told him that's easier said than done." "If 'rt wasn't for me, those giﬂs would be crushed and back at work humiliated." "Yeah, but you've made your point now, though, yeah?" "It's not about making a point." " You'll run out of money at this rate." " It gives me pleasure." "Yes, but are you doing good to make yourself feel better?" "With this Strike?" "What do you suggest, then, Alec?" "That we cave in to Belafonte and his like?" "No, of course not" "Tell Miss..." "Ask Miss Lloyd to come and see me, would you?" "One newspaper has called you a saint." "Ah, how nice of them." "I'll pay you a hundred pounds a week if you break the strike and go back to work." "Don't talk silly." "I'm not a blackleg, Arthur." "But you don't seem to mind betraying those who helped you climb to the top in the beginning, do you?" "It's the public who make you a star, dear." "And it's the managers who pay you handsomely for that privilege." "You only pay me what I'm worth." "And you are worth everything." "But you shouldn't sully your professional reputation." "Especially not when there's an invitation to perform before the King." "We all want you topping the bill at the Royal Command, but..." "Are you attempting to blackmail me, Mr Belafonte?" "Not at all." "I'm appealing to your better nature." "I will not cave in to your demands." "The public like me, and His Majesty, I am sure, is quite aware of that." "I take 'rt that's your last word on the matter?" "Minimum performance rates for all of you!" "Is everybody hBPPW" " (Cheering)" " You bet your life we are!" "Well done, Marie." "Thank you, Arthur." "All is forgiven." "Forgiven, but never forgotten." "I just think, as my" "Oh, be quiet, Alec." "Just be quiet." " I was merely pointing out..." " I know, I know." "I should be drinking tea." "Shall we go for a walk?" "No." "Just trying to be pleasant" "And as with everything else, you're failing, I'm afraid, Alec." "You'll end up with no-one." "(Distant applause)" "Freddie." "(sighs)" "First little tiff and you run off, never to be seen again." "Mane." "You said you'd always look after me." "I thought you..." "I knew you'd be missing me." "Hello." "The famous Marie Lloyd." "The famous jockey." "Bernard Dillon, the Derby winner." " And what's he doing here?" " Making a personal appearance." "What?" "You're a married woman." "That's what." "(Orchestra plays jaunty tune)" "♪ If you'll be a sport and join the classy sort" "♪ You must copy country squires" "♪ Chasing foxes in the shires (Applause)" "♪ Fetch your hunting gear" "♪ And chase the pretty deer" "♪ And try to attrad the ladies fair from Petticoat Lane to Berkeley Square" "♪ Hunting after dark" "♪ Through the streets of London town" "♪ Yoiks!" "A coy little maid I spy rmdbokhowstxevlinkstfxeotfaereye" "♪ My, what shall I do, all alone here in the park?" "♪ It's neaﬂy ten and I'm soared of men" "♪ Hunting after dark" "MARIE: (Cackles) I think you're so naughty." "Where do we go afterwards?" "Afierwards?" "This is afierwards." "It's past midnight." "I thought you theatricals were always up all night." "We need to keep our strength up." "Don't we, Alec?" "And I need my beauty sleep. (Giggles)" "You don't need any beauty sleep, Marie." "Trust me." "(Giggles drunkenly)" "(Laughter)" "Night, night, Bernie." "I don't want to hear any tales of naughtiness tomorrow." "Think of me, won't you?" "Because I'll be thinking of you." "Drive on." "Oh, what now?" "Always having to draw aﬂemion to yourself." "It's undignified." "Undignified, is it, 0 mister high and mighty?" "What's dignified, then?" "You?" "I know how to behave." "But you don't know how to have fun." "That's the difference." " You're a married woman." " Yes." "But I'm not dead." "You're starting to disgust people." " Can you not see that?" " No, I disgust you." "Everybody else loves me." "I wouldn't be so sure." "What, you think they love you?" "You think they're interested in what you do?" "No-one would have heard of you if not for me." "For what it's worth, people had heard of me." "They clap your ad because you're married to me." "They clap out of respecl...for me." "Maybe we are a mistake." "Stop the carriage!" "(Bangs on ceiling)" " Stop the carriage!" "Walk on." " Miss Lloyd!" " (Reporters clamour)" "You are watching me tonight, aren't you, Bernard?" "I'll wait for you at Romanov's." "Where's the champagne?" "Get another one from the bar, darting." "Tell them it's for me." "Kiss!" "You do like him, don'!" "you, Freddie?" "Yeah." "Why are they being so horrible about me in the papers?" " Well..." " Why?" "You're supposed to be married." "Huh." "Hardly." "Alec Hurley was a little mistake." "Surely I'm allowed to make a mistake." "They like Alec." "They haven't taken to Bernard." "They don'!" "know Bernard." "They're being cruel about him to get at me." "Still, you like him, Freddie." "That's the main thing." "(Door opens)" "How can there be a Royal Variety Performance without Marie Lloyd on the bill?" "His Majesty doesn't want you." "Nothing to do with me." " Who's 'rt to do with, then?" " Take 'rt up with the King." " Is 'rt because of the strike?" " Among other things." "I was coming to the aid of my fellow performers." "I was being honourable." "And for that I'm condemned?" "It's not just the strike, is it?" "Well, what else, then?" "What else can 'rt possibly be?" "You read the newspapers." "Idle tittle-tattle." "It's not, though, is it?" "I am the most famous music hall singer in the country." "They say he is young enough to be your son." "They used to call me a saint." "To perform before the King of our country, the artistes must have an untarnished reputation." "And what reputation do I have?" "Show me the list." "Does it matter?" "I want to see the list of performers." "Alec Huley?" "(Gramophone plays) ♪ She'd stare id she could come to town" "♪ Now, what would Mother Eve think of my new Parisian gown?" "♪ When I take my morning promenade" "♪ Quite a fashion card, on the promenade" "(Laughter)" "♪ Now, I don'!" "mind nice boys staling hard" "♪ If 'rt satisfies their desire" "(Marie laughs drunkenly) Alec Huﬂey?" "The King is an as." "If Alec Hurley is to perform before the King," "I would refuse any invitation that came my way, anyhow." "Badly." "My mother used to sing me this song when I was little." "♪ Each wore a bearskin to cover up their fair skin" "Hera!" "Do you think the King is jealous of me?" "I mean, I am more popular than he." "(Giggles) I'm the Queen of Music Halls" "I am the people's queen." "I am going to do a Marie Lloyd spectacular on the night of the Royal Command Performance!" " I'll be there!" " Everybody will be there!" "(Buzz of conversation)" "Listen up, people." "On the night of the King's Royal Command Performance," "Miss Marie Lloyd will be holding her own performance at the Pavilion Theatre, Piccadilly Circus." "All light?" "Tickets on sale from Monday at reasonable prices." "Everyone is welcome." "(cheering) ls everybody happy?" "ALL:" "You bet your life we are!" "Do you think I've gone too far?" "The Evening News says you're out of touch with ordinary people." "The Daily Mirror calls you conceited." "People like royalty, don'!" "they?" "It's not me mg who's me problem." "It's living with Prince Charming here." "When 'rt comes to it, the working classes are just as moral as anybody else, Marie." "They liked Alec;" "And they like you for being you." "Once they think you're different, you've lost them." "But I am different." "I always have been." "But they mustn't think that." "Once they think you're Lady Muck living with a bit of ﬂash, you're done for." "You need to show them that underneath all the diamonds and furs, you're still one of them." "(Buzz of conversation)" "Ladies and gentlemen," "Miss Marie Lloyd, Queen of the Halls, gives her own Command Performance." "(Cheering and applause)" "(Orchestra starts up)" "♪ We had to move away" "♪ Cos the rent we couldn't pay" "♪ The moving van came round just after dark" "♪ There was me and my old man shoving things inside the van" "♪ Which we've oflen done before, let me remark" "♪ We packed all that we could pack in the van and that's a fad" "♪ And we got inside all we could get inside" "♪ Then we packed all we could pack" "♪ On the tailboard at the back" "♪ Till there wasn't any room for me to ride" "♪ And my old man said, Follow the van" "♪ And don'!" "dilly-dally on the way" "♪ Off went the cart with me home packed in 'rt" "♪ And I walked behind with me old cock linnet" "♪ But I dillied and dallied" "♪ Dallied and dillied" "♪ I lost me way and don'!" "know where to roam" "♪ Cos I just popped in to have a little drop of gin" "♪ And now I can'!" "find my way home ls everybody happy?" "ALL:" "You bet your life we are!" "Course you are." "You're having a better time than the King!" "(Laughter)" "♪ And my old man said, Follow the van" "♪ And don'!" "dilly-dally on the way" "♪ Off went the cart with me home packed in 'rt" "♪ And I walked behind with me old cock linnet" "♪ But I dillied and dallied" "♪ Dallied and dillied" "♪ I lost me way and don'!" "know where to roam" "♪ And 'ti someone mum get me 'm 'a" "♪ I'd be in there with me linnet" "♪ But I can't find my way home" "(cheering)" "(Marie laughs)" "There he is." "What did I tell you, Bernard?" "Marie Lloyd's back." "A triumph." "I was looking out for you." "I couldn't see you." "I was stood at the back." " Oh, you saw me?" " Of course." "You can still hear them cheering." "We must celebrate." "Book the biggest table at Romanov's." "In fad, book the whole of Romanov's." "I want everybody there." "I'll er...join you later." "What do you mean, Bernard?" "You're coming now, ain't you?" "Yes." "Well..." "later." "I have to just..." "Bit of business." "You mustn't let them see you drunk, you naughty boy." "I need to go and see someone." " What, this time of night?" " Can I have some money?" "What do you need money for?" "You give everyone else money." "Just not the man you're supposed to love." "Oh, but I do love you." "Then give me some money." " I will do." " Thank you." "And I'll try and see you later." "If I can get away." "♪ A little bit of love is a luxury" "♪ That's what people say" "♪ And girls just long for a little bit of love" "♪ At the close of day" "♪ Now there's nothing like a little bit of loving" "♪ If you take it in a quiet sort of way" "♪ So just take my tip" "♪ lf you're asking for a bit" "♪ Never mind what people say" "♪ So just take my tip" "♪ If you're asking for a bit" "♪ Never mind what people say" "(Hums)" "I'm famous!" "(Clattering)" "Bernard?" "Why are you taking my things?" "You can't treat me like this, Bernard." " Come to bed." " No." "I've come back to change." "Lend us some money." "Don'!" "go out again." "Please." " Stay with me, please." " Stop worrying." "You know I always come home to you." "Promise?" "Lend us some money." "No." "(Winces) What did you make me do that for, you old 0ow?" "Look at my hand!" "I'm bleeding." "It hurt." "It bloody hurt!" "I'm so sorry." "Look, lie down here with me." "We'll make 'rt better together." "There, there." "Mall'e'll take care of you." "Marie always takes care of everybody, don't she?" "You're old, you're drunk and you're ugly." "(Sobs)" "♪ I'm very fond of ruins, and ruins I like to scan" "♪ You'd say I'm fond of ruins, if you saw my old man" "♪ I went out in the country for a stroll the other day" "♪ Cos I like to study history and the pubs along the way" "♪ I came across an abbey that had tumbled all to bits" "♪ It seemed a relic of a bygone day" "♪ A gentleman said, What is this?" "I said, Excuse me, sir" "♪ I'll tell you all about it, if I may" "(cheering)" "♪ lt's a bit of a ruin that Cromwell knocked about a bit" "♪ A b'rt of a ruin that Cromwell knocked about a b'rt" "♪ In the gay old days, there used to be some doings" "♪ No wonder that the poor old abbey went to ruins" "♪ And those that study history sing and shout a bit" "♪ And you can bet your life there isn't a doubt of 'rt" "♪ Cos outside the Cromwell Arms last Sunday night" "♪ I was one of the ruins that Cromwell knocked about a bit" "♪ And those that study history sing and shout a bit" "♪ And you can bet your life there isn't a doubt of 'rt" "♪ Cos outside the Cromwell Arms last Saturday night" "♪ I was one of the ruins that Cromwell knocked about...a bit" "(Laughter gradually dies down)" "(Murmurs of concern)" "ls everybody happy?" "You bet your life we are!"