"Gentlemen, I have the honor to present Professor Bauman of the Vienna institute of electric research." "Good morning, Professor!" "Professor Bauman is the inventor of the invisible electric ray burglar alarm system, which we have just installed." "We are going to make some tests, so please ignore any alarm signals which you may hear." " Thank you, Professor." " Thank you." "Thank you." " You must know, gentlemen..." " Please." "...that our burglar-proof system is the most perfect and unusual that has yet been designed by modern science." "Now, in here, this little bulb..." " Where?" " Where?" " Here." " Oh!" " Oh!" "You see?" "This little bulb flashes an electric ray through this tube, right into a mirror, which is hidden here." " How interesting." " Back there?" "From here, it is reflected into a second mirror, which is placed over there." "There is nothing to reveal its presence even to the most skillful professional burglar because the electric ray is invisible to the naked eye." "Uh, just a moment, sir." "I do not wish to be disturbed." "Anyone attempting to cross the line would break the ray, the police siren would sound, and the invisible flash light would illuminate the entire store with a flood of piercing light." "I'm sorry, but this is very important, sir!" " It can wait." " It can't wait!" "I'm terribly sorry, Professor." "Go ahead." "And so, before a thief could even approach your vault, the alarm would sound." "Phenomenal!" "Splendid!" "Ah, yes, let us extinguish the lights, and I will demonstrate the system." " But it's too late!" " What's too late?" "The store has just been robbed!" "Ohh!" "Madame is awake." "Hurry." "Hurry." "Come!" "Come!" "Hurry!" "Hurry!" "Come on." "Go on." "Whoop!" "Whoop!" "~ Ooh, Dee Dee Dee ~" "~ Dee Dee ~" "~ Dee, boo ~" "Ohh!" "My soap!" "Yoo-hoo!" "Why, hello, Teri." "Good morning, Marianne." "Morning?" "Afternoon is more like it." "What's the latest news?" "Another one of those sensational jewel robberies." " Not Hollander's?" " No..." "Straussberger's." ""The fashionable Straussberger's jewelry shop" ""in Ringstrasse was the scene this morning" ""of the latest jewel robbery." ""The thief, described as a distinguished young man" ""of fashionable appearance," ""works with a Polish absolutely foreign to usual underworld methods."" "Oh, my dear, don't give me a shock like that again." "What is it, Teri?" "Just as I had my finger beautifully prepared for the excelsior diamond, I had visions of it being carried away by a band of criminals." " The excelsior?" " Diamond... the one that you and I went into such raptures about." " Franz is giving it to me." " Oh, my dear!" "He's meeting me at Hollander's at 5:00." "I want you to come along." " The famous excelsior diamond!" " Yes!" "Imagine having a husband like yours, who would gladly spend a fortune just to make you happy." "You are a lucky girl, Teri." " Don't you think so?" " I did think so." "For a month, marriage was thrilling and exciting." " Then it became dull." " What?" "Unbearably dull." "Good gracious!" "Married to 8 millions?" "Aged 55, with chronic gout." " Please." " Turn over." "No, thank you." "But for your lovers, you may have your choice... cabinet ministers, diplomats, men of affairs." "When a man achieves the distinction of a red sash across his shirtfront, his chest, my dear, is the most important part of his anatomy." "But the young attaches of the diplomatic corps, the military cadets... are all thinking too much of their future to risk making love to the wife of a man of Franz's importance." "Oh, for a knight who will come riding in full armor, sweep me into his arms, and carry me away!" "A knight who would gaze into my eyes and whisper passionately that they were green, like priceless emeralds that he would gladly give his life to possess." "But they are not green." "They are blue." "Not emeralds." "Sapphires." "Sapphires..." "my first love." " And your latest?" " Diamonds." "White, pure, cold." "Virginal." "And men?" "I haven't found one to supplant my jewels." "But Andre will be here at any moment to take it to Hollander's." "Hurry." "Hurry." "Hurry." "Hurry, please." "The more haste, the less speed, madame." "May I clear out the window, Mr. Hollander?" "Is it so late?" "Almost closing time." " But so light out." " The long summer days." "The baroness will soon be here to take number 239." " Good evening." " Good evening." "Mr. Hollander?" "Yes?" "I have the honor to present myself... night watchman Johan Christian Lenz of the Vienna protective agency." "I've never seen you before." "That is why I'm presenting my credentials." "I have been guarding the national bank." "Hmm." "That's not such a fine recommendation." "My contract said I was to watch out for burglars, not directors." "Lenz is nobody's fool." "Mr. Hollander..." "I don't like that aspersion on my ability." "I am one of the agency's best men." "So?" "That is why I was sent here to Ringstrasse." "There's been too many robberies lately." "We must put a stop to it." "Good, good." "I shall breathe easier now that you are here." "Thank you." "Thank you." "The window is ready to be locked." "The door can wait." "I'll be here until 7:00 tonight, on a special appointment." "Don't worry." "I shall look in every half-hour." "When Lenz guards a place, the owners can sleep peacefully." "So long." "I say thank you." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Ah, the great baroness Hohenfels." " I beg your pardon." " And madame horn." "Good evening." "Good evening, count Andre." " Leopold, three, please." " Yes, sir." "W... we've been expecting you, baroness." "And how is the baron?" "Oh, he's quite well, thank you." "I only hope he doesn't keep us waiting too long." "Oh, look... all of the dear, little jewels going virtuously to bed for papa." "Their papa prefers them less virtuous." "There's no profit in sleeping at home." "I must remember that." "Oh, come, madame." "Come." " Mr. Hollander?" " Yes?" "Oh!" "Thank you, Leopold." "You may go." "I'll lock up." "Thank you, sir." "Good night, baroness, madame, your excellency." "Marianne, I can hardly wait." "Oh, Teri, compose yourself." " The lights flare up." " The ring appears." "There should be music." "Ah!" "The famous excelsior diamond." "Oh, it's ducky, isn't it?" "It's too beautiful." "The new setting pleases you?" "What perfection!" "Such brilliancy, such depth." "There's something of the infinite in it." "I would think so, too, if you'd only let me see it." " There!" " I'm not going to steal it from you." "Just look at it." "Please, please, please, please." "28 carats." "Really, Teri, you must tell me your secret." "4 carats is the best I've been able to do, and that had a flaw in it." "What wouldn't a woman do for such a treasure?" "Oh, anything." "I'd deceive my husband, with pleasure." "A woman would do much more than that." "She would tolerate her husband." "One?" "A dozen." "Oh, take it away quickly, or I'll swallow it!" " Oh, Mr. Hollander?" " Yes, madame?" "What is the price now?" " $50,000." " Oh, $50,000." "Do you know what I object to most?" "No." "What?" "Her own husband is buying it for her." "Imagine getting hold of a prize like that in such a respectable fashion." "Oh, it's disgraceful." "Her own husband!" "And here he is!" "I'm sorry I'm late, but I met our distinguished undersecretary of state walking along in distracted fashion in front of Palheim's, so I brought him along with me." "Hardly the thing for a cabinet officer." "Ah, my darling, I..." "Ah, here it is." " Very becoming, too." " Yes." "Well, it's not as large as I expected it to be." "Not as large?" "28 carats." "What on earth did you expect, Franz..." " the rock of Gibraltar?" " I don't know." "He won't buy it." "What are you asking for it... $30,000?" "It's all over." " $50,000." " $50,000?" "I was just about to say it's hardly worth $20,000!" "Oh, Andre, quickly, tell him what a fine stone it is!" "Yes." " Oh, you've had a look at it, Andre?" " Oh, many times." "It's a friend of 20-year standing." "Will you please tell the baron what a bargain he's getting at $50,000?" "$50,000 is out of the question." "But I couldn't let it go for less." "Well, you know your own business best." "Teri?" "Not going to buy it?" " Sorry, dear." " But you promised." "Oh, you're missing a great bargain." "Let me get you the expert's appraisal." "In the original bill from Louis Toone from Amsterdam, you will see exactly what it cost me." "I'll be back in a moment." "Teri, I despair of ever making a businesswoman of you." "You're going to buy it!" "But not at his price." "He'll take less." " Won't he, Andre?" " Well, the poor devil needs cash." " Then we'll do even better." " Ohh!" "Now, it's silly to be sentimental." "If our positions were reversed, he'd drive the hardest bargain he could." "You use what weapons you can to get money... against a rich man, a revolver..." "Against a poor one, his poverty." "Am I right, Paul?" "Of course." "We diplomats, too, are only effective when we have power and use it." "Franz?" "Yes?" "How much are you willing to pay?" " $30,000." " You'll get it." "Good night." "You going already?" "I've served my purpose." " Goodbye, darling." " Goodbye." "I hope this new acquisition brings you a woman's most cherished need..." "a new thrill." "Oh, Andre." "Goodbye." "Goodbye, Teri." "I had trouble finding the bill." "Here it is, in black and white." "From Louis Toone in Amsterdam... in black and white, yes, yes." "Let's go into the office." "Yes." "Yes." "You stay." "Please." "Why didn't you meet me at Palheim's for tea?" "I forgot." "45 minutes I stood in front of that restaurant." "I'm sorry." "Ohh!" "You're a coquette." "Sometimes." "But with you, I've been strangely honest." "The moment I realized that I'd made a mistake, that you weren't a dream hero..." "I have 12 war medals for bravery." "And haven't I seen them, over and over?" "I say, as soon as I realized... there was some disappointment on my side, too." "Well, then, how easy it should be for us to say goodbye." "I'm not a schoolboy that you can throw over with a gesture." "What is the right way to throw you over?" "I'm not going to be thrown over at all." "I'm going to marry you." "You know my husband, I believe." "Of course, Teri, but when as fine a woman as you..." "I'm not a fine woman." "In my own eyes, I'm shallow and weak." "Why?" "Because I go on leading a shallow and weak life." "Whereas with a little courage, I could break away from it." "I have all the qualities to make quite a decent person." "And what have I done with them?" "I fly about all day, pursuing furs, jewels, excitement." "I don't love." "I don't even suffer... that is, anything except boredom." "In the morning, a cocktail, in the afternoon, a man, in the evening, veronal." "That, my dear minister of state, is my picture of your Teri." "Is it too high?" "What on earth?" "I took stock of myself when I decided to break with you." " This is the result." " But, Teri... oh, it won't be lasting... just the passionate, fleeting desire that my life should be clear, simple, and pure, like that stone." "What you've just said convinces me more than ever that you need me as a husband." "Oh, Paul." "Congratulations, madame." " All settled?" " We compromised." "I accepted his offer." "And here it is." "Lambie!" "Oh!" "By all means." "Good evening." "Good evening." "Anything I can do for you?" "I'm sorry to intrude at this late hour." "Oh, its perfectly all right." "Well, then, will you kindly put up your hands?" "Ohh!" "All of you." "I'll shoot anyone who moves." "Proceed, gentlemen." "Never mind the lady." "I think I'm going to faint." "There's no reason why you should, madame." "You're really very safe here." "Sorry." "Wha..." "Oh, wh... what are you and your men doing?" "With your permission, Mr. Hollander, we're robbing your shop." "Ohh." "Police!" "Ohh." "Uh, gentlemen, will you be seated, please?" "I prefer to stand." "I won't attack you." "That's reassuring, but I'd rather you were seated." "I don't like strangers looking over my shoulder." "I wish they'd pass a rule like that at my bridge club." " This is preposterous." "Something should be done." " You do it." "I am unfamiliar with the procedure under the circumstances." "Henry." "Don't forget you're handling our property now." "That's right, sir!" "I was forgetting!" "Do be a bit careful, won't you?" "Don't bother to look after the police." "My chauffeur will attend to that for you." "Oh, by the way, Mr. Hollander, are you insured?" "Yes." " For the whole value?" " Yes." "Well, then, why look so tragic?" "Be happy that, in these unspeakably bad times," "I'm turning your merchandise into cash for you." "But I have so many old pieces." "I'll never be able to assemble such a stock again." "Subtle bit of business." "That's old-fashioned." "Can't you do something to liven up our little party, baroness Hohenfels?" "You know me?" "I know all the people who own unusual jewelry... one of the elementary requirements of my trade." "Won't you chat, please?" "Chat?" "Yes, chat..." "uh, airy nothings." "Can't you smile a little?" "You look so charming when you smile." "This is a joke, isn't it?" "Joke?" "You're not really a thief." ""Thief"?" "That's an ugly word." "Uh, let's say "robber."" "What's the distinction?" "Well, there's more flavor to "robber."" "We're in the most exclusive jewelry shop in the Ringstrasse." "In robbing a place of this sort, one must have a drawing-room technique." "And this, I find, always helps to make the atmosphere more congenial." "And nothing like music to keep people from doing rash things in a moment like this." "Now, may I disturb you a moment?" "Thank you." "Oh, isn't that beautiful?" "South Africa or Sumatra?" " Sumatra." " Mm." "Cut by Schindhelm in Amsterdam." "Yes." "You have exquisite taste, Mr. Hollander." "Thank you." "That's why I'm paying you this visit." "You're just a common thief." ""Robber."" "Your face is vaguely familiar." "I've seen you somewhere before." "Possibly." "What are your clubs?" " I'm beginning to place you." " Oh?" "It was at some polo game." "Now, at what polo game have I been where there was a robbery?" "My dear minister, if it was at a polo match," "I was playing." "Uh, will please say, "ah"?" "Mm." "No." "Say, uh, "ninety-nine."" "Ninety-nine." "Thank you." ""From Teri."" "Now, uh, may I disturb you again?" "Thank you." "That's a very becoming dress you're wearing." "I'm not sure I wouldn't like you better in blue..." "a deep, lovely blue." "It would just match your eyes." "Has everyone ever told you that your eyes are like sapphires?" "Apparently, conversation doesn't interfere with your work." "No, not at all." "On the contrary, it calms." "It dissipates all fear." "Notice how calm you've all become." "Terror has vanished from the scene of the robbery." "All quiet, sir." "The girls are doing beautifully... not a policeman within 10 blocks." "Splendid, splendid." "Whenever we stage an event of this kind, we always place a very alluring blonde on each corner." "So we never have to worry about the police." "Effective, don't you think?" "This is becoming delightful." "The lady is pleased?" "I am glad." "He doesn't need your encouragement." "But it helps." "Oh, you must admit the situation's unusual." "And the operation practically painless." "You see now the advantage of suiting the method to the place?" "The customary technique of terrorism would certainly not have amused you." "As it is, the lady has smiled, the gentlemen are at ease, and we shall even have time to take a lot of the gold and silver." "That's very accommodating." "I'm learning a lot from you." "Now, that's a real tribute." "That's the first time I've ever known my husband to admit that he could learn anything from anybody." "He's going to learn something from me someday." "I wouldn't provoke him, Paul." "He doesn't get a chance to shoot a cabinet minister every day." "He's comparatively safe." "I do very little shooting these days." "As a matter of fact," "I'm opposed to the American school of banditry." "I studied in Paris." "You have to work harder, but you do acquire a certain finesse that is missing from the "stick 'em up and shoot them down" school." "And note this, too..." "no mess, no confusion." "A new stock can be moved in tomorrow." "No bankruptcy lawyer ever cleared out a place more tidily." "For which I must thank you all." "You have cooperated beautifully." "Protective agency coming, sir." "Thank heavens." "Sit down." " If you move..." " I..." "I'm not moving." "It's marvelous how you respond to suggestion." " Now, one last favor, yes?" " Yes." "When the watchman enters, just talk to him calmly and leisurely." "Tell him that you still have half an hour's work to do." " You understand?" " Yes." " "I have some more work to do." "Come back in a half an hour."" " Right." "And none of you should find it difficult to be calm with my revolver pointed at you." "And now let's talk so our good friend won't be troubled." "Do you tango, madame?" "There's nothing like a tango to bring people closer together." "Well, here I am, Mr. Hollander." "Time, tide, and Lenz can always be depended upon." "A little too early." "I still have some work to do." "Come back in an hour." "Half an hour, Mr. Hollander." "Half an hour will be enough." "Oh, yes." "Half an hour." "As you say." "Huh." "All the goods put away." "Yes." "Every last piece." "That's fine." "Much better than to let things lie around all night." "You might be my echo." "Always be suspicious." "Don't be fooled by anybody." "Anything strange... if it ain't more than a mouse's whisker... call the police." "There's a man for you." "From the Vienna protective agency, aren't you?" "That's right." "I could tell." " May I ask a favor?" " Surely, sir." "You may have noticed my car standing in front of the shop." "Would you mind carrying out those two bags and putting them in?" " With pleasure, sir." " Thank you." "Say!" "They're not filled with feathers, are they?" "I should say not." "Gold." "Gold?" "Oh, I see." "Taking it away to have it melted." "Yes, tomorrow, the whole lot gets melted." "Well, I'm glad to see somebody in Vienna's doing business." "Good night, Mr. Hollander." "Good night." "And you won't move away from this car until I come out, will you?" "When I watch, I watch." "Lenz is nobody's fool." "Please?" "No, no, no, no, no." "Well, I must bow to that." " Thank you." " Delicious." "Thank you, but I've done even better." " Once in Paris..." " It's getting late, sir." "Oh, yes." " Cigarette?" " No, thanks." "Mr. Hollander, do smoke one of my cigarettes." "With pleasure." "Now, inhale deeply." "Thank you." "Yes, in Paris once, as I started to tell you," "I carried away a case of gold in broad daylight, and 12 gendarmes accompanied my motor." "Nothing like having the help of the police." "Mere bravado." "Not at all." "I don't fancy your method of buying the authorities." " That's a lie." " Come on, now, baron." "We know that you bankers keep governments in your waistcoat pockets." " You're a communist." " I'm not a communist." "Go right on smoking, Mr. Hollander." "Never mind us." "Oh, the present order of society is entirely satisfactory to me." "You think I should do as well for myself under communism?" "What should I steal?" "Power plants?" "Grain elevators?" "International finance takes brains." "He's not laughing at you, baron." "It's just life you're laughing at, Mr. Hollander, isn't it?" "If you're so clever, why not come around to my office someday, and I'll try you out?" "I couldn't take that chance." "You're a banker." "You might not be honest with me." "What's so funny?" "!" "Drop him on the sofa, then out the back." "What did you give him?" "A pleasant, harmless smoke." "He'll awake in the morning, fresh and happy, with a marvelous appetite." " Gentlemen." " I am smoking." "Thanks." "I only smoke cigars." "Well, then, perhaps you will be kind enough to step into the safe." "No." "To my everlasting regret," "I am going to be forced to lock you in." "Don't be depressed." "It isn't for life." "The cells are..." "uh, the safes are comfortable and electrically lighted." "And now, madame, with which gentleman would you prefer to share a safe?" "I prefer not to be locked up at all, with either of them." "Very diplomatic." "In that case, we lock the gentlemen up together." "If you please, gentlemen." "Let me tell you something." "If you let us go now, I'll try and get you off with a light sentence, but if you lock us up, that's legal assault, and I'll see to it that you get the limit." "I'm sorry to have to interrupt." "You can finish your speech in the safe." "Darling!" "Auf Wiedersehen!" "Don't let him frighten you, Teri." "The evening paper, sir!" "Now to dispose of you." "What are you going to do to me?" "No." " Well, then, a cigarette." " No!" "Oh, but they're harmless, really." "Two puffs, and you'll be hearing soft music." "The world will begin to revolve pleasantly." "No." "Three, a beautiful dream." "How do you know all this?" "Experience." "I assure you, all the ladies fall asleep happily." "Oh." "So you can steal their jewels in peace, I suppose." "I'm sorry." "I won't take it." "I don't want to have to force you." "I won't take it." "You're adamant?" "I prefer to keep my wits about me, thank you." "I had a feeling you'd be stubborn." "I'm not trying to amuse you, but to make a clean getaway." "Would you rather I gag you?" "Why must you do anything to me?" "I have no particular desire to see you arrested." "Thank you." "You've given me a very exciting 10 minutes." "It will make me the center of interest at teas and dinners for weeks to come." "But think how much more interesting your story will be if I brutally gag you." "It's a much better story if I could say that you locked the gentlemen in the safe and dashed out." "Well, you don't actually have to dash." "Then everyone will ask you why you didn't call out." "That will make you an accomplice after the fact." "Ooh!" "That's even more thrilling." "I'm afraid we're losing sight of the main object." "Oh, no, no, please." "Please don't hurt my lips." "Everyone says my lips... are heavenly." "You're so lovely." "It's hard to be brutal with you." "You do strike a fresh note." "Up to now, men have always been brutal because I am lovely." "Please." "The safe." "Certainly." "Thank heavens." "Please?" " With pleasure." " Thank you." "If you'll come with me." "What?" "What do you expect me to do in there alone?" "Madame, this is business." "I refuse the safe." "Well, then come with me." "I'll drop you somewhere in the suburbs, untouched." "Untouched in the suburbs?" "Oh, no." "No, that doesn't intrigue me at all." "I'm afraid you'll just have to let me go free here." " No, no, that's the last thing I can do." " But why?" "I assure you I have no interest in having you arrested." "The man in me would like to believe you." "The robber is more cynical." "I give you my word." "No." "I don't lie." "My hand on it." "Your hand." "Oh!" "Oh, my ring!" "Ohh!" "Oh." "Oh, it would have been a pity to miss this." "Now, don't bend your finger." "It may hurt." "You shouldn't put obstacles in the way of a man trying to earn his living." "Oh." "Marvelous." "How intimate." "You hurt me." "Aw, no, no." "Are you really going to steal my ring?" "Yes, but only as a memento, a souvenir of the lady who was willing to share a safe with me." "That's not true." "I didn't mean that." "No, but you did mean the slap, didn't you?" "You know, I'd have allowed more time for this robbery if I'd known you to be here." "I'm almost tempted to kiss you." "I..." "I'm afraid you might scream." "And..." "Ah." "Here." "H... here you are, sir." "Ah, splendid." "With the compliments of the Vienna protective agency... not a loss to an investor in 38 years." "Oh, no, I couldn't, sir." "Come, an honest day's pay for an honest day's work." "Thank you, sir." "Cigarette?" "Thank you, sir." "Just keep the box." "Oh, thank you, sir!" "I'll smoke them later." "What is the matter, sir?" " Another robbery!" " Where?" "Out in the shops, the Ringstrasse!" "These robberies are becoming increasingly daring!" "It is essential that we leave no stone unturned to apprehend this criminal and his possible accomplices!" "A man comes out of nowhere, flourishing a revolver." "To Teri, such a man is not an enemy to society, but a romantic figure." "I must work hard to acquire wealth, devise shrewdly, think clearly, outwit men." "But that doesn't make me interesting," " does it, my darling?" " No, dear." "No, but this man, perfectly safe behind his revolver..." "Safe?" "I'm glad I'm not in his shoes." "Teri will soon have a chance to see how debonair he is wearing handcuffs." "Yeah." " Oh, here they are." " Hello, Teri." " What's the matter, Franz?" " Teri will tell you." " I'm so glad you've come." " Well, what's happened?" "Something thrilling." "What is it, Paul?" "There was a holdup in the jewelry shop." " What?" "!" " Just after you left." "Oh, how exciting!" "We were locked in the safe." "Teri was left alone with the robber." "The police aren't satisfied with her statement." "Oh, they are silly to expect a woman to tell the truth about what happened when she was alone with a man." "Imagine!" "That's the order of the day... be attracted to a criminal!" "Any man who doesn't bathe daily and who has a police record becomes a hero." "The courtrooms are crowded with women." "A man that does some shooting, and half the women forget their husbands." "And if he happens to have married a girl or two on the side, he becomes a national hero." "You're quite right." "What did happen, Teri?" " I fainted." " She didn't." "You also believe that I let the robber go free?" "You let him go because you're incurably romantic." "He evidently extracted a promise from you to keep quiet if he didn't lock you up in the other safe, and you were so touched by his consideration that you kept your word." "I've noticed that women keep their word only with men they'll never see again." "The president is waiting, sir." "Excuse me." "Good evening." " Ha!" " Miss, excuse me." "I am here because the police ordered me to come." "Nevertheless, I..." "I want to thank you for explaining to the police that even a Sherlock Holmes would have carried out the two bags." "Yes, yes." "Did they say which one of the robbers they think they have caught?" " Caught?" "!" " One of the robbers?" " You didn't know?" " That's probably why they sent for Paul just now." "Oh, yes, he would know." "He has made a personal issue of this." "He is right." "What would happen if they started locking cabinet ministers in vaults as a regular habit?" "The country would probably have some peace." "Whom have they arrested?" "One of the robbers, they think." "Did they find any of the jewels on him?" "If they had, there'd be no need to identify him." "Yeah, more than likely, they've caught someone" " who was Miles away from the scene of the robbery!" " I hope so." "Is that a fitting sentiment for an ex-police officer?" "I don't like this business of identifying robbers." "The president is waiting to question us again." "Very good." "He'll see you later." "But nevertheless, we still want to know why you did not scream when the robber left." "I told you." "I fainted." "Bring in the prisoner!" "We have caught one of the men." "I told you the police would get them." "If it's the robber and he isn't handsome," "I'll never forgive you, Teri." "Will you be so good as to identify him?" "Baron Hohenfels, you recognize this man, don't you?" "I think so." "My eyes were focused on the leader, but I'm quite sure this fellow was one of the thieves, quite sure." "And you, baroness?" "Uh, I don't know." "I think not." " You think not?" " I think not." "You haven't half-looked at him." "W..." "I suppose he's one of them." "You'll swear to that?" "Perhaps." "Send in night watchman Lenz." "Hollander could identify him, I'm certain." "That drugged cigarette will keep him asleep for hours yet." "We'll question him when he wakes up." "Lenz, this man was one of them, wasn't he?" "I..." "I simply put the bags in the car." "But he was one of the thieves, wasn't he?" "!" "I simply put the bags in the car." "I see nothing to laugh at!" "Neither do I." "But if you would have tipped me off, given me the high sign, winked your other eye, or wriggled your little finger at the robber," "I'd have been on my guard." "But there you all sat as quiet..." "like... as quiet..." "As a man with a gun pointed at him." "This is no joke, Lenz!" "I'll talk to you later!" "As for you ladies and gentlemen, there will be no need of further questions for the present." "I thank you for your indulgence and your cooperation." "You stay!" "Good night, baron." "Good night, baroness." "It was very kind of you to come down." "So..." "Perhaps a little solitary confinement will improve your eyesight." "Cigarettes." " Polacheck!" " Yes, excellency?" " Some cigarettes." " Yes, excellency." "Permit me, your excellency." "And your memory..." "possibly that'll improve under the gentle care of our police." "Quiet!" "Andre, will you please see Teri and Marianne home?" "We're going with the president to follow up some clues." "And console yourself with the thought that, in all probability, I shall phone you in half an hour and tell you that we have captured the thief." "You are most generous." "The thought that you are placing your life in jeopardy in the defense of your honor and mine will enable me to sleep soundly." "Good night." "H... hello!" "H... hello?" "!" "Hello!" "Hello!" "Hello!" "Yes, this is Napoleon." "No!" "No!" "I am Napoleon!" "No, no, this is Napoleon." "No, I am Napoleon." "But you can't be Napoleon." "Why?" "Now, why?" "Why can't I be Napoleon?" "Because you look like... what?" "What do I look like?" " You look like the..." " President!" "Quiet!" "Ohh!" "Where did these roses come from?" "They weren't here when I left." "Someone sent them!" "Oh, you are brilliant." "But who?" "Berta will know." "Your husband." "You should know better than that." "Paul." "He's the kind who only sends orchids." "An unknown admirer?" "I wonder." "There's no card." "Did you ring, madame?" "Berta, Berta, come here quickly." "When did these flowers arrive?" " They didn't." " Who brought them?" "No one, madame." "They weren't here when I left." "No, madame." "But no one delivered them." " Are you sure of that?" " Yes, madame." "I see." "That's all, Berta." "You won't need me to... no, no, that's all, Berta." "Good night." "Good night, madame." "It might have been." "The robber wasn't really short and fat, was he?" "He was short and fat." "For the police, yes, but between ourselves," " What was he like?" " Marianne!" " What was he like?" " Marianne, no, no, no." "What was he like?" "Oh, what was he like?" "Charming." "Very attractive?" "Beyond your dreams." "Distinguished?" "He robbed that shop like an emperor bestowing a cross of honor." "Marvelous!" "And so gay, so well poised." "As I watched him go about his work so simply," "I realized what a high civilization we have in Europe today." "What a shame to meet a man like that in a shop." "Why a shame?" "He's the sort of robber one should meet in a Pullman." "What do you mean?" " Didn't you see it in the paper?" " No." "Last week, an American woman was robbed in the Simplon Express, stripped right down to her teddies." "No!" "What would you do if you found yourself in your teddies?" "What would you do?" "Let the train go on!" "Lost soul!" "When I'm traveling at the rate of 80 Miles an hour," "I'm not responsible for my actions." "Oh!" "Shh." "Listen." "What's the matter?" " Someone's walking in the garden." " Nonsense." "Someone's walking in the garden, I tell you." "I can hear the gravel crunching." "I can hear it, too." "Oh, look quickly, Marianne." "I'm afraid." "No, no." "No, no, go." "Go on quickly, quickly." "Wait." "Someone is walking in the garden." "Who is it?" "A man!" "A man?" "Quickly, quickly!" "Let me see!" "Where?" " There." " Where?" "There, just stepping into the light." "Oh, my heart." "Ohh." "My chauffeur." "How stupid." "Aah!" "I'm going to get out of here." "It's giving me the creeps." "Marianne!" "The balcony door's unlatched." "Someone has been here." "I knew it." "What is it?" "My jewelry." "My jewelry's in this room." "Where?" "In the safe, over there behind that panel." "The safe is open." "This is the end." "He's taken everything." "Why are such men allowed to live?" "Oh, my poor darling." "I hope they catch him and kill him!" " Making a fool of me, sending me flowers, flowers, flowers!" " Oh, Teri." "All my beautiful things!" "My beautiful things." "What?" "It's all here." "There's not a thing missing." "Then, why in heaven did he... unless..." "What?" "The ring!" "The ring he stole from me today." "How could it be?" "Oh, the sweet thing." "He's made me a gift of my ring." "That would happen to you." "He's marvelous!" "Teri, it's immoral." "And now that I have the ring, what am I going to do with it?" "You must telephone the police at once." " And let them know that I have it?" " Of course." "Impossible." "If they know that I have the ring... then it would come out that there was something" " between you and the robber." " Yes." "Ah, you admit, then, that you did let him get away." "Yes." "Even though he's a robber to us, he stormed that shop like a hero." "Yes, I did let him go." "How will you ever get out of this affair?" "I wish I knew." "And the worst of it is, I can't keep the ring." " It's sure to be discovered." " Of course." "I'll have to give it back to him." " Are you crazy?" " Maybe." "How will you ever find him?" "He'll find me." "Oh." "Please order the car for me at once." "Marianne, you're not gonna desert me in this crisis?" "Oh, I don't mind a little flirtation, but this is going too far." "Oh, please, please." "Just stay the night." "I should say not." "There will be a scandal, and I'm going to protect myself." "How ashamed you'll be in the morning for having deserted me." " Did you ring, madame?" " Yes, Berta." "Tell the chauffeur that madame horn is leaving immediately." " Yes, madame." " I hope you're disgusted with yourself." "There, now." "You can go." "Well, be displeased with me." "I can't help it." "I'm a respectable woman, and I'm afraid." "Don't you think I'm afraid?" "I shan't close my eyes all night." "Well, this is one night" "I shall be very glad to be with my husband." "What do you want?" "If it's possible, a cup of tea." "Oh." "Oh, were you thinking of going to bed?" "Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no." "Why, then, let's talk." " Talk?" " Yes." "The conditions are so perfect... no one at home, the servants asleep, complete stillness outside, and so much to talk about." "Help." "That's adorable." "Please do it again." " Oh, this is awful." " Why?" "I'm having a very good time." "Won't you sit down?" "You behave exactly as though you were paying a call." "I am." "After a very brief and informal introduction," "I am now making a formal call." "Through the window." "But only to preserve your reputation." "I came very discreetly, by way of the drainpipe." "That's not legal!" "Oh." "Oh." "Permit me." "You know they've caught one of your men?" "Oh, he'll go free." "We shall produce 12 witnesses who will swear that he spent the entire afternoon with them at his aunt's house, 15 Miles away." "That's not true." "Well, certainly not." "Neither am I short and fat, as you told the police." "How do you know that?" "I, uh, overheard your conversation in the bedroom." "While I was undressing?" "You were everything I anticipated." "Cognac?" "Thank you." "Well, I'm glad." "Yes, I'm very glad that you're here." " You excite me." " If you hadn't come," "I should have had to go and look for you." "You are making me divinely happy." "How dare do you present me with this ring." "Oh, forgive me, but the ring was yours originally." "Yes." "Yes, that's true." "But don't you understand that if I... the only way that I can get the ring back is to have the police return it to me, following your arrest." "I'm sorry, but, uh, that method of returning it to you doesn't intrigue me." "Then take it back, at once." "No, I'm not in the habit of taking back gifts." "If you don't want it, give it to the police." "But that's just what I can't do." "Don't you see?" "No, I won't take it back." "If I keep the ring, it makes me your accomplice." "It binds me to you." "A consummation devoutly to be wished." "Be careful." "If you drive me too far, I'll scream for help!" "I will not take back the ring." "So, you will not take back the ring?" "No." "Well, then, hands up." "Are you sure that's loaded?" "If you don't steal back that ring immediately," "I'll shoot you." "You want to make a pool of blood, huh?" "Yes." "Well..." "If you insist." "Ohh." "Did I hurt you?" "D... do be a bit more careful, won't you?" "Now..." "Let's try it again." "I don't know what to do." "Why did you come here tonight?" "A philanderer would say because he loved you." "So I can't say it." "But I do." "I can't believe that." "Why?" "Because..." "how old are you?" " 15." " Huh?" "Oh, I've lived 15 years." "The rest doesn't count." "Your conscience?" "Uh, beautifully clear." "Your past?" "Fortunate." "Your future?" "Doesn't exist." "I live only for the present." "And the present is you." "I beg your pardon!" "No one knows I'm in the house." "Night is before us, and, if you wish, at dawn we shall have a secret behind us." "That's not possible." "A man like you doesn't climb a drainpipe just to make love to a woman." " True, alas." " Ah." "I'm being sought in every quarter of the city." "An army of detectives is searching for me." "The last place anyone would think of looking for me is your bedroom." "Oh." "So you expect to stay here until morning?" "Oh, I'm forced to." "Tomorrow the chase starts all over again." "I must have a peaceful night." "A peaceful night in my bedroom?" "Tomorrow I'll disappear and take my loot with me." "What loot?" "Forgive me." "I forgot to tell you." "I've deposited the stolen jewels with you." "What?" "!" "In the rear compartment of your safe." "Uh, the police will never think of looking for them there." "You mean Hollander's whole shop's in there?" "No, uh, only the diamonds." "Take it right out of there!" "In that small, brown, leather bag." "Take it away at once." "But honestly, it's the best place for them." "I shall go out of my mind." " Who's there?" " Berta!" "There's a detective here from police headquarters!" "A detective?" "He wants to speak to you, madame!" "What'll I say?" "We're already in bed." "We're already..." "I'm already in bed." "Tell him he'll have to wait till I dress." " The drainpipe." "The drainpipe." " One moment." "I'll have a look first." "They mustn't find you here." "No luck." "Two policemen below." "Quickly, hide." "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, not there... my husband's bedroom." "Oh, if he should come back?" "The detective says he can't wait any longer, madame!" "Don't be nervous." "If there's any danger, depend on me." "Yes, yes!" "I'm coming!" "Good evening, madame." "I am from the police department." "Oh, please, won't you sit down?" "I'm sorry to disturb you so late, but I'm here on an important matter in connection with the jewel robbery of this evening." "Yes?" "The examination has taken a suspicious turn." "It involves you more than ever." "Me?" "And in one of our best hotels, we seem to have found a valuable clue." "Really?" "A distinguished young man of fashionable appearance." "Yes?" "Two hours after the robbery, this young man returned to his hotel, and most significant, he carried in his hand a small leather bag, an ordinary, harmless-looking, brown, leather bag." "Why should I be interested in anything of this kind?" "I beg your pardon." "I merely mentioned it that you might have a complete picture." "When the gentleman left the hotel, he again carried with him the brown, leather bag." "He climbed into a taxi, the detective directly behind him." "Must you go into all these details?" "Wait a minute." "The taxi proceeded along the ring, past the Karls church, and turned into the Argentinierstrasse." "Into my street?" "And there it stopped." "The gentleman left the taxi and went the rest of the way on foot." "Presently, he stopped in front of your house." "Ohh!" "Your house, madame." "And that is why I permitted myself to disturb you at so late an hour." "Oh, but I..." "I still don't understand why... it is my opinion that this man has somehow managed to hide himself in this house." "Impossible!" "What are you going to do?" " Search the house." " Search the house?" "!" "Why are you so frightened, now that you are safe?" "Oh, yes, yes, of course." "Search the house." "Search thoroughly, from roof to cellar." "Begin at the cellar." "Perhaps you will be so kind as to leave the method of search to me." "First of all, I should like to look at your jewelry, to make sure that nothing is missing." "That won't be necessary." "I've just looked myself." "It's all there." " And this ring?" " What?" "There's a description of this ring with the police." "This is the excelsior diamond." "Oh, no." "No, you must be mistaken." "Madame, how did this ring come into your possession?" "Well, this evening, when I opened my safe," "I found it there." "Really?" "That must be a most interesting safe." "We will examine it a little more closely." "Ohh!" "Oh." "Oh." "No." "Well, this is delightful... a leather bag, a harmless-looking, brown, leather bag." "I swear I'm innocent." "And in it, the stolen jewels from the Ringstrasse." "Oh, surely, surely you don't believe that... you may have a plausible explanation for this terrible situation, madame." "But as a police official," "I must unfortunately do my duty." "Oh, what are you doing?" "I'm ringing for the maid." " Yes, madame?" " Madame's bag..." " and pack what may be necessary for a night." " A night?" "!" "It may not be necessary after all, with your husband's influence, but first of all we shall have to go" " to the house of the police president..." " No." "...and after, if he thinks it's necessary," " to the police station." " No." "No, it's incredible." "I can't go." "I won't go, I tell you." "Think of the scandal." "The police aren't afraid of scandals." "Baroness Hohenfels at a police station?" "It's unthinkable." "I won't stand for it." "One moment." " Ohh." " I need that bag." "Adieu, dear lady." "Forgive me if I've inconvenienced you too much." "Beware of the law!" "What a pity." "I congratulate you, sir." "You've won the round." "Take him away." "You mean you're going to arrest him?" "Help!" "Help!" "Yes, madame?" "Now you're calling for help." "You should have done that at the jewelry shop." " Oh, what shall I do?" " Come along." "All right, I'll go with you." "But you'll see." "You'll be sorry." "Wait till my husband comes..." "Oh." "Oh." "Don't you worry, madame!" "I'll tell the baron about it!" "He'll take care of those brutes!" "Oh, madame!" "Here we are." "Get along, now." "Don't hang back." "Why not be a bit polite?" "We can move without being growled at." "Shut up." "I'm frightened." "The president will be here in a moment." "Do they examine you here in this room?" "Examine and cross-examine." "You get to like it after a while." "Like it?" "The police president's apartment?" "Oh, no." "My apartment." "Your apartment?" "Allow me to present Fritz, an old associate of mine... very trustworthy on these occasions." "He's not a detective?" "Oh, indeed, no, madame." "Oh, I never was so happy to meet a robber." "Forgive me, madame, if I have caused you a few unpleasant moments." "So, this was all part of an elaborate plot to kidnap me." "What other means were open to me?" "You wouldn't have accepted an invitation, would you?" "I should hope not." "You remember my offer?" "Well, here we are... set down in the suburbs, untouched." "No, no, no, no, no, no." "Supper first." "Oh, no." "No, it isn't true, any of it." "I'm at home, dreaming." "And I am with you." "Good night, and good appetite." "Good night, Fritz." "Alone with a robber in his den." "Are you unhappy?" "I don't know." "At the present moment," "I'm in the grip of an overwhelming passion." "Yes?" "Yes." "I'm hungry." "Oh." "That's because you were frightened." "There's nothing like a little fear to whet one's appetite." "Now, will you be so kind as to introduce me to you?" "Which one of me?" "Oh." "Is there more than one?" "Oh, dozens." "That's another requirement of my trade." "Let me see, now..." "which name to take?" "Usually it's so easy." "You give me a name." "I don't want to, really." "The nicest part of this whole affair is that you're the unknown, a figure out of a fairy tale, the robber in seven-league boots." "No, this isn't the time for me to give you a name, but to forget my own." "Much the better way." "Merely man." "Merely woman." "And to whatever joins them." "You're not drinking." "You are my wine tonight." "Oh, now, please." "Can't you do better than that?" "That was a bit shopworn, I confess." "But what would you have me do, invite you immediately to... you can't invite me to do anything." "Whatever you do must be done by force." "Well, then..." "Ooh!" "Ooh!" "What are you doing?" "Using force." "Oh, please, let's not be in such a hurry." "There are so many pleasant intervening steps." "For instance?" "Well, I think I should know more about you." "You don't want to hear the story of my life." "Why not?" "I'm curious to know how you were led astray." "Well, I began life as a little boy." "I'm glad to hear that you kept to the same sex." "Yes." "It's a family tradition." "But very soon I began to want things, beautiful things." "And one day in Paris, I stopped to admire a display of jewelry in a shop window, miraculously beautiful gems behind a thin pane of glass." "Suddenly, the glass was gone." "I had broken it." "My career had begun." "And you've broken windows ever since?" "No." "My technique improved as my collection grew." "Show me your jewels, will you?" "Of course." "There... there must be some gorgeous things among them." "There are." "Of course, I don't keep everything right on tap." "Even a robber has to look out for burglars." "Exhibit "a"... compliments of Mr. Hollander and Teri Hohenfels." "Oh, no, not those." "I want to see what you stole in Paris, Rome, London." "Paris, Rome, London." "Oh!" "I want to play with these the way a child plays with sand, try them all on..." "Pour them all over me..." "Bury myself in them." "Oh, they're too heavenly." "This necklace..." "where did you get it?" "At a charity ball." "What courage!" "No, merely nimble fingers." "The lady stood beside me." "The prince of wales was announced." "I could have removed her dress." "And these emeralds?" "I owe to the invention of the airship." "When a zeppelin arrives, everybody looks up." "I look down." "This lovely stone with the rose cast... where's it from?" "Somewhere between Lyon and Marseilles." "Was she pretty?" "Suppose she was." "I'm jealous." "Jealous?" "Does that mean you love me?" "It must mean something like that." "It's my only excuse." "Will you come away with me?" "I leave Vienna tonight." "We'll fly together." "Flight?" "Oh, no." "Abduction, perhaps." "Anything you like." "Where do we go?" "To eternity." "Oh, that sounds far." "I'm afraid." "Stay close to me, and you won't be afraid." "Come with me to nice." "We'll be Miles from Vienna." "The season is on." "The casinos are gay." "We'll bathe ourselves in music, drown ourselves in champagne." "I'll make love to you as I've dreamed of making love." "That sounds divine." "Perhaps there by the sea, away from everything... don't say "perhaps."" "Dance with me in nice on Thursday." "Oh, wait." "I feel now that I don't dare go with you." "How will I feel tomorrow when I've realized that I've let you go?" "I know how I'll feel." "I'll dance with you Thursday." " The hotel Negresco." " For tea." "Darling." "I'll follow on the first possible train." "Now I'll rush home and pack." "I warn you, if you fail me, I'll be right back." "Infant." "I'm already on my way to you." "Goodbye till day after tomorrow." "You promise you won't let the police catch you." "I promise." "Charles?" "Charles." " Yes, sir?" " I'm off." " I'm going to nice." " But you can't do that." " Every railway station's being watched." " Pooh to them." "I'll be in nice the day after tomorrow." "Oh, what an adventure this is going to be." "We'll start packing at once." "Bring me that jewel case from the library table." "There's no jewel case here!" "I left it there on the library table." "You couldn't have, unless somebody's taken it." "Don't be funny." "Why, I..." "Did..." "Good heaven, it isn't possible." "What's that?" " That woman... she got away with it." " I don't believe it." "A thing like that couldn't happen to you." "Couldn't it?" "Well, it has." "I've always warned you about those society women." "This is ridiculous." "She won't get away with it." " Call the police at once." " The police?" "!" "Oh, of course we can't do that." "This is what I get for being such a sentimentalist, for believing in the fundamental honesty of people." "Well, I'll be." "Oh, no." "No, I can't do it." "Police!" "Cover the rear!" "You take the right!" "You take the left!" "One of the best jobs we've ever pulled off, and not a stone to show for it." "Police!" "Police!" "The streets are swarming with them." " Is everything set?" " Yes." " The doors all barred?" " Solid." "Then clear out quickly." "I'll join you in half an hour." "Giddyap." "You robbed me." "The jewelry was safer with me." "You told me so yourself when you brought it to my house." "Am I to believe that that was the reason you took it?" "Oh, don't think about that now." "The police are here." "Oh, don't worry about me." "I'll get away." "What are you going to do?" "What can I do?" " Come with me." " Where?" " Over the roofs and away." " I don't dare." "Romance, adventure, gaiety, excitement, a chance to live." "No, no, I can't, I tell you." "It's insane." "I must have time to think." "Well, then..." "What are you doing?" "This is the only way to return you to respectability and to give you a chance to think." "They'll know now that you fought for virtue's sake." "If you come to nice, I'll be waiting." "If not, this is goodbye." "Auf Wiedersehen, dear." "I love you." "Help." "Help." "Help!" "Here she is!" "Here she is!" "Teri!" "Oh, you poor thing, trussed up like a chicken!" "Get me out of here quickly." "Which way did he go?" " Through the window." " Through the window!" "Can you give me a description?" "Yes." "Yes, of course." "He wore a brown, leather coat, red scarf, and green spectacles." " And short and fat!" " Yes." "Thank you." "We'll have him in no time!" "Oh, dear, I'm sorry." "Don't worry, baroness." "I'll get him!" "Leave it to Lenz." "There he is!" "I'll get him!" "There he is!" "Now go ahead!" " They've got him!" " Where?" "Where?" "In the courtyard!" "Teri, he got away again." "But we'll get him." "I hope it's been a lesson to you." "Oh, it has been." "My nerves are shattered, simply shattered." "I must get away for a long rest at once." "I think I'll go to nice." "Yes, nice." "Nice." "On the first possible train."