"The Celebration" "Christian speaking" "Hi." "I'm here now" "I landed this morning" "What?" "Err..." "Washed?" "I shaved at the airport, if you must know" "I'm fine" "Right now I'm looking at the fields" "My father's land" "It's beautiful" "It makes me want to move back for good, but there'd be a few problems" "I'll make it" "Yes, I suppose it will be shocking" "What?" "You're dropping out" "OK. 'Bye" "Bloody hell, that's my brother" "Why the hell didn't you say something?" "As if I saw him!" "Jesus!" "I have to do everything myself" "Shit, Christian!" "Look at you, man!" "See him, Kasper?" "He's walked all the way from Paris" "Only from the station" "I could fuck you right here!" " Fucking hell!" " You're frisky" "It's been bloody ages!" "It really has" "How's tricks?" "I'll give you a lift" "Hop out, kids!" " I'm giving Christian a lift" " There's plenty of room" " Sit in the front" " I can walk" "No, I want to talk to you" " You really expect us to walk?" " What's the problem?" "All that way!" "He's my brother, for fuck's sake!" "Give me a break, will you?" "Asshole!" "Chill out!" " Is Dad here already?" " Not yet" " Hello, what's your name?" " Lars" "Lars..." "OK, Mads, listen up" "I'm not very good with new staff, get it?" "Who do you think we are?" "This is Christian..." "My brother" "He has two restaurants in Paris." "And I've got... one cafe in the docklands." "Alright" "We grew up here, so we know how to treat customers" "A really good receptionist keeps an eye on who's who, right?" "And you give us rooms 9 and 19" "I'm afraid you're not on the list" "What?" "Look again:" "Michael Klingenfeldt" "Your father has told me that Michael is not invited" "OK, Mads, listen up..." "Lars, OK?" "Right, Lars..." "Things went a bit amok last year." "I got a bit pissed..." "A couple of schnapps over the top and I freak" "I've brought the bloody wife and kids..." "Michelle is here too..." "That's nothing to do with me" " ls there a room or not?" " Not!" " Let me talk to my father" " He's out hunting" "Sort it out yourself, then." "That's your job, right?" "Lars, just find a room." "I'll talk to Dad" "Just give us one of the small rooms" "They're never used." "Number 3 and 1" "Give us one of those" " You don't want a key?" " Of course" "I must be on the list ls our sister here?" "Please get a move on" "It's Daddy's birthday, his sixtieth" "The cars up ahead, that's my family." "I have to get there first" "Nadim, wasn't it?" "Nadim, yes" "If you go a bit faster I'll give you my phone number" "Hi." "Baby!" "Hi!" "Are you ready?" "They're nearly here" " You haven't been drinking, right?" " Not today" "Wasn't it a fantastic funeral?" " I'm ready" " What are you doing here?" "What?" "You missed your sister's funeral, you're not invited" "Don't poke your nose into what I do" "I'm poking it into what you don't do" "You didn't come to her funeral!" "You didn't phone on my birthday!" "You couldn't give a damn" "Now she's starting, too." "I'm going home!" " Want my bike?" " Come on, you two!" "I won't have it" "Be quiet." "It's always the same bickering" "That's right, be quiet" "Spoken just like Christian" "Stop that!" " Stop it!" " Listen to clever Christian" "Beep again." "So they can hear it" "That's his wife." "One of the son's" "That's Mette, damn it" "And the three little piggies" "You kids put a sock in it." "We're here!" "Behave yourselves!" "You just don't do that!" "I'm your sister" "Good thing it's only once every ten years" "Welcome, Grandad..." "Thank you, thank you" " Thanks for the lovely funeral" " Thank you" "Great to see you again" " Hello again" " The trip was so hot" "I'll go and unpack my wife" "Hi, Dad" "Your father asked me to be..." "toastmaster this evening, OK?" "Do you know Lise?" " How are you, my boy?" " It's so sad" " The weather, I can't take it" " Go have a beer" " You haven't changed" " Thanks" "Go on into the hall." "You'll meet Helge" "Hello, Uncle" "Christian darling, how lovely you could make it after all!" " You look great" " Excuse me, the guests are here" "Go to your father." "Don't forget to say Happy Birthday" " Hello, Dad." "Happy Birthday!" " Thank you" " They're all waiting" " Sit down a moment" "I have something important to tell you" "Sit down" "Sit down" " Join me in a Cognac?" " No, thanks" "Yes, it's... very important" "I've been thinking about it for days" "Listen" "Two hookers are sitting in a railway carriage" "Don't laugh at your old dad!" "On his birthday, too!" "How dare you?" "I'll have to tell your mother" "We're waiting for you" "The boy is laughing in my face" "Christian, you mustn't do that" " Fine, let's all tell jokes" " Everyone's waiting" "To hell with them!" "If I want a chat with my eldest son" "How are things?" "Fine." "I'm opening a restaurant in Lyons and..." "I can read the papers, my boy." "You're doing well" "How about that girlfriend who's always phoning?" "Can't you give her a kid and come back here?" "She's having someone else's kid" "Then find another girl and move back here" "I'm getting older and I want my family around me" " Then there's your mother" " What about her?" "She's getting tired of my jokes" " I can see why - What do you mean?" "What's wrong with my jokes?" "There's no respect any more" "Tell me how you are" " Got a girl?" "Oh, I've already asked" " Come on!" "We're coming" "Come along, my boy" "Just one thing..." "Christian..." "Will you say a couple of words about your sister this evening?" "I'd just blub" " I've already written something" " You have?" "Well done, my boy" " Michael is here" " Michael?" "I suppose I'll have to talk to him" "Your guests are ready" " Michelle, are you married?" " No" " You're asking the wrong person" " I think so, too" "Sorry, that was my other son..." "I'll have a word with him" "Today is Helge's birthday!" "He'll get lots of presents." "And there'll be buns and cocoa..." "Hi, Christian." "Which room are you in?" "What?" "Seventeen." "Why?" "I need to borrow your bath." "I mean:" "May I borrow your bath, please?" "And the sound of the sea..." "I'll put them down here" " The main course is a secret" " A secret?" " You have been hunting today?" " Of course" "Are you listening?" "Good" "It was the third time we were going to move to Copenhagen, right?" "But Bettina moved in with him instead" " Bettina?" " Yes" "Anyway, I'm still here, right?" "We went to the park yesterday" "I've been given the room where my sister died" "Well, it's better than giving it to Christian" "They were twins" "It's one thing not wanting to talk about it... but covering it all up is just silly" "Look... it's spooky" "Yes, I can see that" "Like a haunted home" "I don't think she'd like it either" "If we take the covers off and move the furniture a bit..." "Then I'll stay with her" "I don't mind at all" " Certainly" " OK" "This is where it happened." "The bathroom" "Maybe I should have another room" "Yes, would you rather?" "It's just that..." "I'm getting really bad vibes" "Did you hear that?" "She's in the bathroom" "No, she's... she's dead" "We'll just have a look" "No, I think we should go" "No, we must look" "Hey, Mette, I can't find them" "Have you checked the suitcases?" "I can't find my shoes" "They should be in a suitcase" "I've looked in that one" "Keep your shirt on" "I can't go to dinner in brown shoes." "Dad will go crazy!" "They must be somewhere" "I've looked everywhere" "I think I left them behind" "You didn't say that." "Get it?" "Go back and get them." "You've got two hours" "Take the car" "Stop this shit, Michael" "I can't see my dad in socks" "You expect me to go home now?" "What would your mother and father say?" "I can't go to dinner in these shoes!" " Are you insane?" " You could just pack your own stuff!" "I've packed for you, me, and the kids and you want everything to be just so" "If you don't like it, pack your own shit!" "I've got fucking news for you!" "You're the one who does the packing!" "And every single time you lose my shoes!" "You're the one who wanted to visit your fucking parents!" "I worked for a while at a cake shop" "Actually, I'm doing the dessert tonight" "What does it mean?" "An upward arrow?" "Up, up, up?" "If you lie in the bath, maybe you can see if there's something there" "The bath?" "You want me to lie in the bath?" "Shall I lie down?" "See if you can spot anything" "A sign or another arrow" "A wave or a fish or a bird." "Kind of like Getting Warmer" " It's just not good enough" " I'm sorry" "I'd just ironed this" "I said I was sorry" "Shall we... shall we lie down for five minutes?" "What about the party?" "We'll just lie down for five minutes, right?" "There's a fish!" "It means flat, which means down" "I'm not sure I understand this game" "Oh dear..." "How strange!" "We always played it." "Getting Warmer" "Come on..." "Sit down" "Check next to the other leg" "How sweet of her to have done this..." "I can hardly bear it" "I'm the only one still stuck here" "The rest of you go swanning off to Paris and..." "You can't sit here crying" "I'm sorry" "Have one of these" "Just say if you want me to go" "Didn't you want a bath?" "An arrow again" "And another arrow" "Will you..." " Will I what?" " Undo me" "Look, I've still got a good ass." "Is a bath all it's going to get?" "Up there, look!" " On the other side" " Where?" "Next to the bulb" ""To whoever finds this letter." "You are probably..."" " Bloody hell!" " It doesn't say anything" "Mette, damn it!" "Did you leave this soap here?" "This pisses me off!" " Michael" " Why did you leave the soap here?" "You're the one who used it, prick" "Shit!" " Did you hurt yourself?" " I certainly fucking did!" "There have always been ghosts in this house" "It doesn't say anything" "I'll happily stay here." "Thanks for your help" "You were really frightened?" "Not at all" "A bit?" "I'm sorry." "Thanks for your help" "Why the hell did you leave the soap there?" "I didn't, you did" " I didn't" " You're the one who used it last" " Where are my pants?" " I don't know." "Over there!" "You should take care of your things" " I'm not your babysitter" " Shut up!" "Jesus!" "Oh, for God's sake!" "The fucking thing's fallen down now." "Shit!" " You'd better put it up again" " Bollocks!" "It's weird." "You were always the wild one, getting into fights" "Now it's your brother" "You can't even be bothered to look at a pretty girl any more" "Maybe you think I'm too skinny" "Christian?" "I'll put it in here." "They mustn't find it..." "Done" "Where have you gone, lovely Christian?" "It's six o'clock." "Time to get up!" "Cards, please!" "Tickets, please!" "Or other proof of travel..." "My trousers!" " Hi, Grandpa!" " Hi, Dad" "I'll see you in the lounge in five minutes!" "These fucking shoes..." "Hi, Bent!" "Be cool" "Hi, Poul, how's tricks, you old bastard?" "Hi, Dad" "Later, my boy..." "we're going in now" "It's about..." "I've been asked to inquire whether you are interested in the Lodge" "I don't see you as one of the brethren, I must say" "But Christian has told Preben you're doing well" "And as Christian is not interested you may expect to be invited to join the Freemasons" "Strike while the iron is hot." "This may be your only..." "He could make something of himself..." "We have to help you get on" "But try to behave like a normal human being tonight, alright?" "Keep your hands off what's-her-name..." "Michelle?" "I'd like you to hover about, keep things running smoothly" "Can you manage that?" "You, you're supposed to serve drinks." "Get a move on, will you?" "Go on, move!" "Have you got a drink?" "We need to talk" "I can't right now" "You do remember something, don't you?" " Yes, certainly" " Jolly good" "I was thinking of saying a word or two this evening" "I thought as much" "It won't be anything fit for little girls" "I bet it won't" "You fell asleep" "Aren't you sleeping properly?" "Only with you" "It's a great honour for me to act as toastmaster this evening for the Klingenfeldt-Hansen family" "My name is Helmuth Von Sachs" "Yes, I am from Deutschland Cologne, the Ruhr, the steelworks" "And also Helge is a man of steel." "Still going strong" "Helge, mein Freund, mein danishes Vater, over to you" "Seeing you all reminds me so clearly of the years gone by... and of all that's happened to us" "There's nothing special about turning sixty" "It's not a big deal" "It seems like yesterday when we concluded the final negotiations for the take-over of this unique place" "Yet it was way back in the summer of 1971" "when my young family walked up these steps" "My dear wife," "Helene," "Michael, and the twins..." "The twins..." "Ready to move into this beautiful estate" "We were so..." "We were so full of expectations" "I'll stop there" "I'll stop there and hope that we will have a lovely party together" "Let's eat!" "First course." "Ready..." "Go!" "Over and out" " Did you enjoy the drive?" " No, it was very hot in the car" "You've got air conditioning, Bent" "Yes, but it dries your mouth up" " It really is most unpleasant" " Really?" "The kids are here too" "Give me some water!" "May I have some water, please?" "I'm all wet..." " What's your name, lass?" " My name is Mette" " M. E. T. T. E. Mette - That's right, yes, Mette" "I said it's lobster soup..." "lovely!" "No, it's salmon soup" "Salmon?" "I think it tends more towards lobster" " It's delicious, this soup" " Yes." "Tomato soup" "No, definitely not tomato." "It's lobster soup" " Yes" " Yes, lobster soup..." "cheers!" ""Eldest son's speech"..." "Ready, Morten?" "It's nearly seven o'clock and" "I should like to propose the first toast, it being my duty as the eldest son" " Correct, Helmuth?" " Absolutely" "But first, a speech" "I've written two, Father" "One is green, the other is yellow." "You choose" " Green?" "Yellow?" " I'll take the green" "The green is an interesting choice, it's a kind of home truth speech" "I've called it "When Dad had his bath"" "I was very young when we moved here" "Things changed completely for us" "We had all the space we wanted and we filled it with as much trouble as we could cause" "This room was a restaurant then" "I can't count the times my sister Linda, who is now dead and I played in here" "She would put things in people's food without their noticing" "We would hide and watch." "Then she would begin to laugh" "She had the most infectious laugh you can imagine" "In no time at all we'd both be howling with laughter and we'd get caught" "But nothing ever happened to us" "It was much more dangerous when Dad had his bath" "I don't know if you remember, but Dad was always having baths" "He'd take Linda and me into the study... as there was something he had to do first" "Then he'd lock the door and roll down the blinds" "Then he'd take his shirt off and his trousers and make us do likewise" "He'd lie us across the green couch that's been thrown out now... and abuse us sexually." "He raped us." "Had sex with his little ones" "Christian!" "A couple of months ago, when my sister died" "I realised that Helge was a very clean man, with all those baths" "I thought I'd share it with the rest of the family" "Baths." "Summer, winter, spring, autumn, morning, evening..." "Really, Helge's a very clean man" "I just wanted you to know that seeing as we're celebrating his sixtieth" "What a guy!" "Imagine living a long life and watching your children grow up!" "And grandchildren!" "But you didn't come to listen to me" "We've come to celebrate Helge's sixtieth, so let's do so" "Thank you for all those wonderful years" "Happy Birthday!" "I have nothing to drink." "Fill our glasses!" "Christian, you were the first but now it's my tum" "Elsie, it is your birthday" "It's Helge's!" "What did he say?" "He said it's Helge's birthday, Grandad" "Helge, it's your birthday, and that's good" "You're a big boy now." "Your ears can take a story from across the seven seas" "Nice one, Grandad!" "I have to go" "When Helge was a young lad he told me he had trouble finding ladyfriends" " Hello, Christian" " Kim..." "I've got a plane to catch" "Stop, everybody!" "May I introduce my boyhood buddy, Christian" "You know most of them" "Christian, how are you?" " I'm fine" " You're fine?" "Well done, Christian" "You've made your speech and now you're going home" "The battle's lost." "Nothing's changed" "Over" "Are you drunk?" "How else could I cook?" " How long have we known each other?" " A long time" "Since Year One?" "We scrumped apples together" "I've been waiting for this ever since, and you just run away" "From your father, who drew lots for you and your sister" "A brilliant start to your speech." "Drawing lots like your father" "What do you want, Kim?" "Sorry to interrupt, Grandad" "I just want to say that I hope none of you took Christian seriously" "He is my brother and I love him dearly" "But what he said wasn't true." "And I should know, right?" "Sorry for interrupting." "I'm a little shocked" "At 7.15 your father'll come down to give me a time for the main course" ""I think they like the food", he'll say, as usual" "And he'll have his usual glass" "Just give me two minutes" "I thought you'd gone" "Come here!" "Bring a schnapps for me and my son" " That was splendid" " Thank you" "I think they like the food" "Have some schnapps" " No, thanks" " Really?" "That tastes good." "Damned good!" "I do believe it's damned good" "Have one yourself" "Come with me" "Alone" "Off we go!" "Well, how are you?" "I'm fine" "Are you?" "Are you sure?" "Well, I don't understand this" "My memory must be failing me." "Age, probably" "What do you mean?" "What you talked about" "I don't recall any of it." "You'll have to help me" "What happened exactly?" "Sorry it's probably me who got it wrong" "Don't apologise or you'll really have me worried" "I'm just a bit stressed out at the moment with work... and my sister" "Forget it" "What you were telling us is a crime." "I think we should call the police" "No, don't do that" "Just forget it" "I'm not sleeping well." "I'm feeling a bit weird." "Sorry" "Are things going well upstairs?" "Yes, fine, fine" "It takes more than that to shake them" "Have a good trip home." "It was nice seeing you" "They're waiting for me" " Helge, it's your birthday" " Grandad, not again!" "You're a big boy now" "Your ears can take a story from across the seven seas" "When Helge was a young lad he told me he had trouble finding ladyfriends" "I told him, "Listen, lad!"" ""Just buy a big potato and stuff it down your swimming trunks" "Go down to the lake and they'll come running!"" "Anyway, summer came..." " What do you think?" " Me?" "I don't know what he's planning" "He came back in despair and told me things were far worse now" "Nobody would talk to him" ""No wonder", I said. "You should have put the potato down the front of your trunks"" "For he's a jolly good fellow!" "Michelle!" "Pia!" "A word" "Michelle come here, Pia come here." "A word" "We'll steal their car keys." "Over" " What?" " Us?" "It's Christian's turn tonight." "People mustn't go home yet." "Over" "I don't think he intends to say any more." "He apologised" "Let's wait and see." "Don't tell the old waiters" "They need their pensions" "Off you go." "Now!" "We mustn't leave any traces" "No, no, we'll be careful" "I've got it!" "Next room ls everything OK?" "There aren't any problems?" "No, no." "Everything is OK" "ls my brother staying the night?" "I don't really know" "A taxi?" "I'll check it out" "Hey, Charlie Brown!" "You've come to the wrong place" "Can I go?" "Just a moment" "Listen, Sambo." "I don't know where you met my sister..." " Michael, what are you doing?" " What the hell do you mean?" "What the hell are you doing?" "Mind your fucking manners!" "How dare you drag some monkey to Dad's party?" " Are you calling Gbatokai a monkey?" "How dare you?" " Chill out" "You Nazi bastard!" "OK." "Push off!" "Mum, hang on." "This is my boyfriend, Gbatokai" "Mum, you haven't met him before." "That was someone else" "Forgive me for disturbing you again." "But I forgot the most important bit" "We're here for my father's birthday, not anything else" "If I led you up the wrong track earlier, I'd like to make amends by proposing a toast to my father" " Please stand - Well done, Christian" "Raise your glasses!" "Here's to the man who killed my sister." "To a murderer" "I'd like to propose an interval" "Cigarettes!" "Quick!" "Play something" "Nice and quiet" "Play something" "No, let's stay a while." "We can't just leave" "Christian, are you crazy?" "Christian, can you hear me?" "Are you crazy, Christian?" "Make sure nobody goes home" "He's sick... sick, damn it!" "For the last time!" "I have phoned..." " Get me a taxi" " Just a moment" "I can't take it." "I already suffer from depression" "We can't leave!" "There are no taxis here" " Fine, then I'll walk" " Alright, let's walk!" ""Here comes the Danish summer"." "I've had it with these gatherings" " Bent, have you seen the car keys?" " No, I haven't" "We're leaving but I can't find our car keys" " Problems?" " I can't take it" "The number you're calling is still engaged" " There is an eleven month wait" " May I speak to Kim?" "Lars, just take it easy, OK?" "Hide those car keys!" "In the oven" "In the fridge" "All gone!" "Where the hell is Michelle?" "Come in, damn it" "Michael, I want a word with you, too" "You must leave" "No." "We're going to talk now" " Mette, you must hear that too" " We're going to talk, come on!" "In here." "Come on" " Let go of me - Calm down, alright?" " OK, what do you want?" " Last year..." "You came on to me and now you won't even give me the time of day" "I'm sorry, right?" "Damn it..." "I've got my wife here" "It's funny, she's never been that important before" "You know I got pregnant?" "Don't worry, I got rid of it." "I just thought you should know" "Listen, it's my old man's 60th and things are going crazy" "Hi, Bent." "Bloody hell." "Is this your room?" "I was just leaving." "Seen my car keys?" "I'll have a quick look, OK?" "Sure you haven't seen them?" "I'll get really depressed if I don't find them" "I know, I know." "Bent, run along downstairs" "Pack up your stuff and get out, right?" "Here's your wages." "Now just fuck off, understand?" "You're as fucked up as your Dad" "Don't ever talk about my family!" "What if I got up and said a couple of words instead?" "About you?" "About how sick you were as a child?" "About the way you always spoiled things for the other children?" "Making them watch as you burnt their toys" "The warped character you've always been?" "About how we had to go to France to rescue you from that sanatorium where you lay sick in the head, as ever, pumped full of drugs" "to your mother's despair" "I could also mention your lack of talent with women" "Lovely women you let go by, year after year because there is so little man in you." "Christian" "I could also make a speech about you and your sister" "What do you say to that?" "Did she ever say goodbye to you?" "No." "Was there a card?" "A letter?" "No." "Nothing" "There was for the rest of us" "And maybe there was a reason why" "Because you just left as usual" "Abandoned your sick sister" "She kept asking for you" "Rushing to the phone every time it rang." "But it was never you" "As ever, you were only interested in yourself and your sick mind" "Now you sling mud at the family that only ever wanted the best for you" "Your mother wants you to go and never come back" "But I think you should stay right here" "Feel what it means to spit in your family's face" "After..." "After that little intermezzo pianissimo" "I think we should return to the dinner table lch Haber Hunger Ladies and gentlemen..." "They're back!" "Christian isn't very happy" "Right!" "Venison and cranberry, go!" "Cheers, Grandad!" "It was a superduper speech" "You keep yelling into my ear" "Grandad, cheers again" "Salt and pepper!" "Cheers!" "Champagne!" "We must have Champagne!" "And caviar!" "If the birthday boy is my danishes Vater," "Elsie is my danishes Mutter" "Everyone's Mother!" "Elsie, over to you" "Give her a hand!" "Thank you, Helmuth." "Thank you all" "I want to say how much I appreciate your coming today" "I also want to say a word or two to thank my husband, my Helge" "Though it may be hard to find the words to describe what you have meant and still mean to me" "But with your appetite for life and infinite love for your family, you have given me everything a wife could wish for" "We've had thirty wonderful years." "Thank you!" "I think I'll take the opportunity to say a word or two to my children" "I think it is fantastic to see how well you have done, especially when I consider how little you once were" "Michael," "You are our youngest, our little baby" "Not that we've seen that much of you" "You were away from home from an early age" "First, boarding school" "Then away at sea" "Then catering college in Switzerland" "You never became a chef but who knows?" "At any rate you have given us three splendid grandchildren for whom your father and I are so grateful" "And of course we thank your little Mette" "Helene, the family loner" "You really are, Helene" "Ever since you informed us that you'd decided to become a singer and had joined the Trotsk... the Young Socialists, I think it was..." "We always knew you would choose your own path" "And you certainly have" "In life as well as your studies" "You've ended up in anthropology" "Most interesting." "Though your father and I always hoped you'd chose Law" "But goodness, I can't begin to count the number of foreign countries and their unfortunate inhabitants with whom you've had contacts" "Speaking of which," "I'd like to extend a warm welcome to Gonzales" "Mummy, his name is Gbatokai" "Welcome, Kai!" "Then there is you, Christian" "You have always been quite special" "A creative child" "The stories Christian could tell when he was small!" "I always thought you'd make a really good author one day" "When Christian was small, for all of you who don't know, he had a loyal companion called Snoot" "who didn't exist" "But Snoot and Christian were inseparable" "If Snoot didn't like something, neither did Christian" "If you were the one at the receiving end, there was nothing you could do about it" "But dear Christian..." "It is so important to be able to distinguish fact from fiction" "I think you've always had trouble doing so" "Of course you can be angry with your father" "I am sometimes, too" "But it has to be sorted out in private" "Telling stories like those you've told this evening however exciting they may be..." "and they were exciting... is going a bit too far" "Christian, I think that Snoot has been with you today and I think you both rather upset your father" "So I think it would be appropriate if you stood up, leaving Snoot in his seat, and gave your father an apology" "It won't belittle you in any way to say you're sorry" "It would be quite alright" "Christian, you may stand up now" "Come on, Christian." "Get your fucking act together!" " He's sick in the head, Mum" " Christian?" "I'm sorry to disturb you again" "In 1974 you, my mother, came into the study to see your son on all fours and your husband with no pants on" "I'm sorry you saw me like that" "Yet you left the room when your husband ordered you out" "I'm sorry you're so hypocritical and corrupt that I hope you die" "I'm sorry that you're all such cunts that you believe her" "I'm sorry that for thirty years, Your husband" "Let me finish!" "I haven't finished!" "Christian, cool it." "Come on." "Out!" " I want my coat" " You can have your coat" "You were away at boarding school." "What the fuck do you know?" "But you know anyway!" " You're way out of line!" " You know anyway!" " Don't you?" " You've gone too far!" "Out of my way!" "Lock the door!" "Is it locked?" "I think so" "In the deep, deep forest peace" "Where songsters dwell" "Where my soul did hearken many a time" "To the birds' happy song" "Where was I?" "Mother, my loyal witness!" "In 1974 you entered the study..." " and saw my father's stiff dick rubbing my hair" " You bastard!" "You bastard!" "He is not well" "It's very sad..." "Mother, please continue" "There is such an idyll, such peace and calm in the sylvan solitude" "That all sorrows are stilled" "Where peace and rest do reign" "Get out of here, you bastard!" "Fuck off!" "Leif, stop that, damn it!" "He's my brother" "Christian, come here!" "The game's over, get it?" "Have you had enough, man?" "Not that!" "He's my brother" " Come on, get rid of him" " Where?" " In the woods" " We've got to stop this shit!" " How far?" " Just get rid of him" " What do you mean, "get rid of him"?" " Shut up!" "Over here" "We'll leave him by that tree" "That's the way." "Come on" "Do we really have to tie you to a tree, Christian?" "What the hell made you talk such shit?" " Is he tied up?" " I'm through now" "Calm down now" "Easy does it" "Take it easy, Christian" "Leif, have you got a cigarette?" "I dropped mine" "I'll check all the doors" "I don't want to talk to him" "What have you done to him?" "Relax" "I talked to him." "He's gone home." "He's very sorry" "So let's take it easy." "We'll talk about it later" "You want trouble?" "Stop it, Michael!" "Michael, stop it!" "That's enough!" "Back off!" " Hi there, Kim" " Hi, Leif" "We need to lock the back door" " Where is it?" " Right over here" " A bad business" " Yes" "You didn't kill him, or anything?" "He won't be back" " This way?" " In here" " This is the wine cellar." " Yes." "Over" "Cut it out, Kim" "What the hell is this?" " You locked him in?" " Yes" "We can't have his type running around" "Hands off!" " Kim, where's Christian?" " No idea" "Stop drinking, Michael" "What did you say?" "Why don't you make a speech?" "Right, let's get things swinging!" "A little sing-song" "I saw a real Black Sambo" "His face was black as pitch" "He spoke all funny" "And had a ring in his nose" "I asked him: "What are you?"" ""Why are your legs covered in tar?"" "He just laughed and said:" "Tomrassi gassi bom!" "I saw a little Indian" "His face was as red as fire." "He spoke all funny" "I can't stand this!" "They'll kill each other!" "I'm going crazy!" "I've got such a headache" "Will you get my tablets?" " Have you seen Christian?" " No, he's gone home" "It's for the best" "I'll get your tablets" "You're all crazy" " You're still capable..." " Oh yes" "For longer than you think, Helge" "It's nearly 10 o'clock and something exciting is about to happen" "As Alfred Hitchcock suggested for his gravestone:" ""This is what happens to naughty little boys"" "Helge, you're not getting out of the family tradition" "The grand finale!" "It's Daddy's birthday!" "It really is today" "Daddy's birthday today!" "Now listen to the way we blow the trumpet!" "It's Daddy's birthday today!" "Listen to the way we play the flute!" "You dropped something!" "You should be more careful" "Helene... you're not going already?" "So soon?" " I want to go home now" " Don't be silly" "It's time for dessert" "I love these family traditions" "After the dance around the house a note appears on the toastmaster's glass and here is what it says:" ""A certain man urges his sister to read letter to his father" A letter" "I think Helene is too shy." "Right, Helene?" "In any case... it is kind of your brother to help you get started" "And it seems that there is peace in the family again" "So let's give Helene a hand" " Come on" " Come on, Helene" "Don't be shy!" "Michael, ignore him!" "It's..." "It's from my sister" ""To whoever finds this letter..."" ""ou are probably my sister or one of my brothers"" ""Because you can play Getting Warmer"" ""Nudge, nudge!"" ""I know you will be sad to find me"" ""in a bath full of water"" ""But it isn't so sad for me"" ""I know my brothers and sister"" ""are happy, radiant people,"" ""and that I love you"" ""And I think you should just forget me"" ""Christian, my beloved!"" ""Who has always been with me!" "Thank you for everything"" ""I don't want to mix you up in this." "I love you too much for that"" ""And you, Helene." "And you, Michael, of course"" ""You nutter"" ""Dad has begun having me again"" ""In my dreams, anyway." "And I can't bear any more"" ""I'm going away now"" ""As I probably always should have done"" ""I know it will fill your life with darkness, Christian"" ""I have tried to ring you,"" ""but I know you're busy"" ""I just want to tell you not to be sad"" ""I think there is light and beauty on the other side"" ""In fact, I'm looking forward to it." "Although, of course, I am a bit afraid"" ""Afraid of leaving without you"" ""I will love you forever"" ""Linda"" "Lovely letter" "Pour my daughter some port, so that I can drink a toast with her" "Pass the port to my daughter so I can drink a toast with her" "Pass her the bloody port!" "Pass the damned port to my daughter!" "Show me some respect!" "I've never seen the like" "What are you staring at?" "Is it my fault that I have such talentless offspring?" "I've just never really understood why you did it" "It was all you were good for" "It's been quite a job being toastmaster tonight" "I must admit I hadn't tried it before" "I am profoundly affected by the situation" "We all are" " Nevertheless, I regard it as..." " I have to go now as my responsibility to see this dinner out" "So I suggest dancing, music and coffee next door" "Good evening" "I have collected the car keys and put them back" "May I have a glass of water?" "Shall I call a doctor?" "Christian?" "Are you alright?" "Come on" "Christian?" "Christian?" "Pia?" "Pia?" "I fell asleep" "Pia, my sister is here" "I love you" "Christian?" "I miss you" "I miss you, too" "Shall I come with you?" "I'm going now" " It's Helene." "Were you asleep?" " What time is it?" "Late." "Three, I think." "I was asleep, too... if you can call it sleep" "You know..." "I've been..." "Maybe you have, too?" " Have what?" " Nothing" "Please come, Christian." "Michael has disappeared" "What's going on?" "What's he up to?" "Michael has vanished and his wife is bawling her eyes out in my room" "The party?" "It's over" "Don't worry about it" "They've all gone to bed..." " Find some glasses" " Where is Michelle?" "In Kim's room, I think" "Everyone seems to be in the wrong bed" "We're not, are we, Honey?" " I've got a glass for Christian" " I want one, too" "Just don't use someone's dirty glass" "Play the wedding march" "Gbatokai and Helene must dance" "Because I think you should get married" "Dad?" "It's Michael, little Michael." "I'm coming!" "Open the door!" "It's the fucking postman" "Open the door, damn you!" "Open it!" "Go inside, Elsie" "Michael, stop it!" "Go inside, I said!" "And I said keep your mouth shut!" "I told you, man." "Keep your mouth shut!" "Lie down, man." "Lie down!" "I said, lie down!" "And stay lying down" "I've heard enough shit." "Lie down, I said!" "You'll never see your grandchildren again, man" "Never again." "Get it, Dad?" "This family... is kaput" "Lie down, I said!" "Lie down, I said!" "It's me ringing the doorbell" "Me, Michael" "They mustn't do it!" "Stop!" "Mummy, what is it?" " They mustn't!" " What's going on, Mummy?" "They mustn't!" "They mustn't!" "Get out there, Gbatokai" "Your father!" "You're killing me" "Killing me" "Waiter, could I have another drink?" "I do like to start the day with a little dram" "Morten, what are you thinking?" "Oh, well." "Over" "Cheerful little soul, isn't she?" "Morning, Christian" " Good morning" " Have a roll" "Where the hell is Leif?" "There you are!" "How's the wig?" "Where do you get your suits creased?" "At N'stved" "Pia?" "Do you want to come to Paris and live with me?" "Yes" "That'll be all" "Have you got the hots for the waitress?" " Michael, shut up and eat up" " I'll eat that French stick" "Dorthe, come to Daddy" "Your father will read it to you, I'm sure" "I know it's an inopportune moment." "You're having breakfast" "I'll try and be brief" "I just want to say..." "I know that when you pack up and go home... it will be the last time I see you" "I also realise now that what I did to my children is unforgivable" "I know that all of you especially my children will hate me for the rest of your lives" "All the same, I wanted to tell you that you will always be my children" "I have always loved you and I love you now wherever you are or whatever you do" "To you, Christian, I want to say" "You fought a good fight, my boy" "Thank you" "Nice one, Dad" "Good speech." "Well done" "But I think you'll have to go now so we can eat our breakfast" "Of course, of course" "Are you coming?" "I'll stay here"