"There are lots of difrerent kind of signals people use to communicate valuable information to each other" "Some are subtle." "Wow, you lost a ton of weight!" "And some, not so much." "Did you hear that, Mike?" "Brian's taken up running and says it's changed his life." "Yeah, I heard." "I don't really care about running." "Aah." "But did you see the shoes she wore on Wednesday?" "To die for." "How many pairs do you think she has?" "That was fun." "Yep." "Kinda late, though." "I was ready to go an hour ago." "I guess you missed my signal." "I missed your signal?" "I missed your signal?" "Oh, that's hilarious." "I gave you so many signals, other people's husbands were responding." "What are you talking about?" "Mike, you didn't hear yourself." "You can't just say every thought that pops into your head." "Aw, come on." "Are we really gonna go here?" "Look, we're 20 years in." "We got 20, 30 more, and we're done." "Can't we just ride it out till then?" "And why are you so worried about it?" "I said it, not you." "Yeah, but you're a reflection of me." "I married you." "I picked you." "When you start saying stuff like that, it's like my own arm suddenly starts flapping uncontrollably," " ...and there's nothing I can do to stop it." " Well, I must be doing something right." "People keep inviting us to parties." "Our party's coming up in a few weeks." "People come to that." "I'm very social there." "You're confusing yourself with me." "I talk." "I make the chitchat." "You cling to the grill and ask people" " ...if they want cheese on that." " You knew what you were getting when you bought me." "I..." "I guarantee you, people are going home right now saying," ""can you believe Mike said that?" "How inappropriate!"" "Or they're saying, "poor Mike." "What a great guy." "Too bad he's married to that shrew."" "Oh, yeah?" "Well, read this sign." "Yep, some signs are unmistakable, like those that signify the coming of spring, when the teenage boy wakes from his long winter slumber and comes out of hibernation to forage for food." "Hey, dad, when are you cleaning the pool for the barbecue?" " Coming up soon!" " Eh, I don't know." "That's a lot of hassle." " Maybe we'll just skip the pool." " What?" "No!" "No, you gotta clean the sweet aboveground pool." "Yeah, well, that pool's turned into a sweet aboveground frog habitat." "It's the kickoff to the whole Orson bikini season." "If our family can turn our back on this tradition, then I don't know what we stand for anymore." "Great." "I have a new tradition." "You clean it." "I'm off." "Bye." "Oh, don't forget We have Brick's thing after school today." "Oh, yes." "The odd squad pageant." "I wouldn't miss it for the world." "Oh, Sue, I was talking to Mrs. hagen at the party last night, and she told me that her daughter's in the church youth group and really likes it." " Youth group?" "Isn't that sorta for geeks and losers?" "Axl!" "I think you should give it a chance." "You're always wanting to join something, and there's no tryouts for Jesus." "Don't worry." "Mom gets on these kicks where she feels guilty, like she's gotta be a better parent or something." "She'll take you a few times, but she'll get tired of driving you." "You won't have to go anymore." "Welcome, parents, to the first spring social-skills-a-thon." "We at the social skills group are very excited to show you the wonderful progress we've made." "First up," "Brick and Zack will demonstrate a reciprocal conversation." "Boys." "Hi, Brick." "How are you?" "Fine." "Thanks for asking, Zack." "How are you?" "I'm fine." " How much are we paying for this again?" " Mike." "N... now I know this all looks easy, parents, but social interactions can be awkward for people who don't inherently pick up the signals or cues most of us take for granted." "Not knowing the right thing to say at a party or other group situation can lead to hurt feelings." "First, let's show everyone the wrong way." "Hello." "Can I join your group?" "Sure." "Henry was just talking about baseball." "I don't really care about baseball." "I'm done talking to you now." "Uh-oh! That's because we, as adults, know it's not okay." "Now let's show them the right way." "Oh." "I don't know much about baseball, but I'd be very interested in hearing what you have to say." "You see, parents, even if we're not interested in what others are saying, we can't tell them that, or people will think we're rude." "Oh." "Hmm." "Hmm." "Excuse me." "Is there a height limit for this class?" "Sometimes the point is so obvious, you don't have to say it." "Say it." "Just say it." "I knew it wasn't my side of the family." "You're always blaming me for Brick being short." "I'm just saying, he might have gotten a few things from you." "You wanna go down this road?" "We can go down this road." "Let's go kid by kid." "Axl's knees... your family." "Sue's teeth... your family." "Brick's snoring..." "You again." "Yeah, we don't have to go down the road." "Okay then." "You know what you know." "Hey, I was very social as a kid." "Well liked, picked first on every team." "Of course they're gonna pick you." "You're a freakin' skyscraper." "Brick doesn't have that luxury." "Ur shrimpy genes, not mine." "It's not just about the genes, Mike." "Kids watch." "They watch and learn." "I know, I know." "I get it." "I need to set a better example." "I'll do it for Brick." "That way, some day in the future, he won't ever have to have this conversation with his wife." "Well, spring's a time for beginnings, and Sue was giving youth group a try." "I mean, I want to be a good parent and everything, but it was kind of a pain to have to drive her." "Oh." "Ohh." "Do you need some help?" "Oh, thanks." "Uh, this happens all the time." "Oh, hold on." "Hold on." "There." "Oh, hey." "Thanks!" "No problem." "Hey, guys." "Uh, let's everybody come on up front, and, um, let's get these chairs out of the way, make a peace circle." "Hey, what happened to Reverend Hayver?" "Oh, he doesn't lead the youth group." "He does." "Really?" "Okay." "For all you new guys, my name is Reverend Timtom." "Well, actually, my name is Reverend Timothy Thomas, but my friends..." "and you are my friends... call me Reverend Timtom." "Let's rap about what's on your minds." "* It's tough being a teen * * when this world can be so mean * * no one takes you seriously * * you say, "who will understand me?" * * when the world tells you you're nothin' *" "* just remember that you'r somethin' * * yeah, it tough being a teen * * yeah, it's tough * * being a teen *" "*" "Oh." "Now if we could just convince him that cleaning out the garage would get him girls, we'd be on to something." "The urge to mate is a powerful incentive, Frankie." "Makes men do crazy things." "Makes men marry." "You know what else is powerful?" "Love and fellowship and understanding." "A lot of forces at play in this complicated world." "It's tough being a teen right now." "Tough being a teen." "Hey, buddy." "Proud of the good work you did yesterday." "Looks like you really learned a lot in the class." "Yep." "So I'm done now, right?" "I worked out all my social issues?" "Social issues." "Well, son, you're never really done." "You can always try to better yourself." "I think I'm probably as good as I can get." "We did the thing, got the pizza party." "I'm done." "Here's the thing, Brick." "Everyone can always improve, even me." "I might not always set the best example for you." "I'm not always the most social guy." "But don't get me wrong." "I was popular, really popular." "Wow." "The stripes on your shirt are thicker going up and down and then thinner going sideways." "Look, Brick, we got this big barbecue coming up." "What do you say you and me go out there and really try to be social." "It'll be like our spring training!" "Our what?" "Is that a sports thing?" "Yeah, sports." "I don't know much, but I'd be interested in hearing what you have to say." "Attaboy! * beneath the long hair, awkwardness and pimples * * king of the jews * * a lonely teenage savior no one could understand * * awkward on the outside * * but inside, a wise young man *" "* yeah, Jesus was a teenager, too *" "Mmm, yes, he was." "He was." "He was." "Mahalo." "Hangoo, everybody." "Um..." "Reverend Timtom, can I ask you something?" "Sure." "What's on your mind?" "Reverend Timtom, are we still going on the field trip next week to explore all God's wonders?" "Yes, we are, Marcy, but I was talking to this young lady first." "Um, Reverend Timtom, I was wondering if you'd like to come to our barbecue this weekend." "You can bring your guitar." "Aw, that'd be beautiful." "I'll be moving to my next parish after the field trip, that'll be a nice good-bye for me, give me a good send-off." "Is that true?" "Is Reverend Timtom leaving?" "Yeah, I heard since they refinished the pews, the parish doesn't have enough money to keep him." "But he gets me. but, Sue being Sue, was not gonna give up." "Hi, I'm collecting money to keep Reverend Timtom in the church." "He really gets teens." "The Heck barbecue was in full swing." "Axl's right." "It's the kickoff to Orson bikini season, and you just can't turn your back on that kind of tradition." "God, what is going on?" "It's supposed to be spring!" "Where is global warming when you need it?" "Hey!" "Come on in the pool, ladies." "I'll hold your sweatshirts while you go in" "Dude, you need to move more!" "Splash around." "Make it look fun." "Ohh." "All right." "So we're clear?" "A lot of backseat grillers are gonna come up and try to tell you how to do it, but you gotta stay focused and do what I told you." "Keep your mind on the meat." "Thank you, Mike." "It's an honor to be trusted with your grill." "My dad never let me anywhere near ours." "He would squirt me with a spray bottle." "Oh." "There we go." "Brick!" "Ready to hit this party and socialize?" "What are we gonna do?" "Look people in the eye." " What are we not gonna do?" " Walk away while people are still talking to us!" "All right." "Mingle on three." "One!" "Two..." "Is that a sports thing again?" "Seriously, Brick, you read a hundred books a day." "Can't one of 'em be about sports?" "I was really touched watching them." "Two socially awkward creatures...  one giant, one tiny...  clearly out of their element, but willing to try." "I just hoped they did better than Bob at the grill." "You're kidding!" "So you have ancestors from France and Belgium?" "Yes." "Genealogy is so fascinating, don't you think?" "Well, I don't know much about that, but I'd be very interested in hearing what you have to say." "Hi." "My name's Brick." "So what do you like to do?" "ah!" "Reverend Timtom!" "You showed up!" "Well, why wouldn't I?" "You invited me." "Well, I invite people to a lot of things." "They don't always show up." "I like you." "I like you, too." "You're a good listener." "You're a good talker." "I've never met anyone as interested in growing winter squash as I am." "Until now, I've known little about the topic, but I've thoroughly enjoyed this conversation." "This isn't working." "My body's not good at regulating its own temperature." "Maybe if we move closer, it'll get warmer." "* * it's tough being a teen * * when this world can be so mean * * no one takes you seriously * * you say, "who will understand me?" *" "Whoa." "Who's the weird old loser playing guitar?" "Could this geezer be any more lame?" "What do you say we hit the pool? and I could rub some suntan lotion on your back, or... you could do mine?" "We could set up a suntan lotion train!" "* and on that day, you'll stand and shout *" "Uh, hey!" "Look at those guys in the pool." "That looks fun. * well, it's tough being a teen *" "Oh!" "Hi, sorry." "I was just looking for a serving spoon for the macaroni salad." "Um, I think it should be... right here." "Oh." "How about that?" "Got it on the first try." "Thanks." "Need some help carrying this stuff out?" "Oh, that'd be great." "Thanks." "I asked Brian to come in and help me, but I don't think he even heard me." " But that's pretty typical these days." " I understand." "Really?" "Did you sense something the other night at the dinner party?" "'Cause he's just... y... no." "You know what?" "Sorry." "I don't want to bore you with my relationship troubles." "Oh, I don't know much about that," " ...but I'd be very interested in hearing what you have to say." " You would?" "I think we got off on the wrong foot last time." "I brought you some cake." "Forks are inside. but then you can't remember what it was you wanted." "I hear you." "It's like something's missing." "You're... you're restless." "Sure." "I've had that feeling myself." "You have?" "Wow." "I just... feel like you get me in a way that... well, no one has gotten me in a very long time." "I'm glad." "God, Mike." "The way you're looking at me..." "You've never looked at me like this." "Thanks for noticing." "This is crazy." "You wake up in the morning, and you think your life's gonna go one way, and then it takes a turn you didn't expect." "So, how do you wanna play this?" "I'm done talking to you now." "Frankie, seriously, give me another chance." "I got distracted when that guy started singing." "It was like he was speaking to me." "There was no way I was letting Bob near the grill again." "I had looked for Mike to take over, but he and Brick seemed to have disappeared." "Socializing is hard." "Harder than I thought." "What happened to you?" "I offered a boy cake, and he punched me." "I got offered somethin', too." "You know, buddy, I've been thinking." "Maybe we're meant to be who we're meant to be, and it's when we start trying to change who we're meant to be that things get mess up." "It sounds like an excuse, but mom'd probably fall for it." "No, I mean it." "Brick, are you happy?" "Yes." "Are you happy?" "Yes." "So why are we letting people try to change us?" "We're fine just the way we are." "So do I still have to go to the social group?" "Eh, Brick, that's kinda your mom's thing." "She wants you to go." "Just go for now." "Eventually she'll get tired of driving you." "Reverend timtom?" "I was trying to raise money so the church could afford to keep you." "I tried my best, but I only raised 6 dollars and 12 cents." "Will this keep you here another week?" " At least until I get my bake sale up and running?" " Aw, honey, I'm not leaving 'cause the church can't afford to keep me." "I'm leaving because I gotta keep roving." "It's who I am." "I'm Timtom, the roving rev." "I hear there's a lot of troubled teens in Dayton, so I gotta move on." "But I just found you, and now you're leaving." "You gave me hope, but now everything just seems impossible." "You know, if you take the "im" off of "impossible,"" "what do you get?" "Im." "No, the other half." "Possible." "That's right, Sue Heck." "Possible!" "You remembered my name." "You only met me twice, and you remembered my name!" "That's why you have to stay." "You get me!" "When you go to Dayton, what's gonna happen to me?" "I'll tell you what's gonna happen to you, Sue Heck." "* You're gonna be just fine * * you're gonna be all right * * you don't have to change a thing * * you're super keen and outta sight * * you heard it from Reverend Timtom *" "* don't let people drag you down * * there's a power up there * * can you feel it now?" "* * don't let them try to change you * * don't let 'em chip away at who you are *" "It's a miracle!" "Thank you, old guitar dude!" "Whoo-hoo!" "Yeah!" "* don't let thetry to change you *" "Yeah!" "The sun's out!" "*" "Oh, Mike!" "You looked into her eyes and told her you understand?" "You can't do that to a woman." "Yeah, apparently not." "I guess all this with a personality is too much." "I need to hold some back." " Honestly, though, nothing happened." " Stop saying that." "I know." "Really?" "Yeah." " That's the flip side to having a husband who's bruttally honest I know you're never gonna lie to me." " Oh, you don't know that." " Yes, I do." " You don't know." "Lot of opportunities out there for a guy like me who knows how to listen." "I'm done talking to you now." "I've been looking for you." "You know, some people like to use ladybugs as their pest control." "I like poison." "Good old American poison." "Yeah, Mike and Brick were never gonna be social butterflies, but when times got rough, they figured a way to help each other out." "Stock up with root vegetables," " ..." "like potatoes and rutabagas..." " Dad, I am terribly sorry to interrupt, but I have an emergency that requires" " ...your immediate attention over there." " I'm sorry." "My son needs my help." "Another time?" "Uh, I..." "I look forward to it." "*" "* fine the way you are * * gonna be fine the way you are * * gonna be fine *"