"Lately, people around here were happier then usual." "Elliot, because she had finally said those three magic words," "I love you." "Todd, because he had finally found his true calling as a doctor," " So what's up with the plastic surgery?" " Dude, that's amazing." "Just when you think you can't see another great pair of boobs you see an awesome dong." "And Dr. Kelso was giddy because it was the first monday of the month." "And today nothing could dumpen his spirits, not even a grieving family." "I am so sorry for your loss." "He was a fighter right to the end..." "We did... everything we could." "See, today was the day the hypodermic needles arrived." " Happy needleday, Lloyd." " And to you, Sir." "And thanks for sending down an extra set of hands." "I'm a lawyer!" "I still don't understand why you get so excited over needles." "Thanks to a delightful decimal error made 20 years ago, by the good folks at Zephir Pharmaceuticals, each month Sacred Heart gets 50.000 dollars worth of hypodermic needles with a low, low price of 50 dollars." "That's it." "I can't feel my arms." "Now, Lloyd, given your past history as a dirtbag junkee, I have to ask:" " Did you take any of uncle Bob's needles?" " No Sir." " I don't use needles anymore." " Oh, so you finally got clean?" " Nope!" "Sign here." " This is a straw, Lloyd." "Dr. Reid!" "I have a package for you." "It's addressed to your home, but since you are here..." "Lloyd, I wanted that delivered to my house because it's private and it would be embarrassing for me to open it here at the hospital." " We--we can't." " We have to." "Wait." "You're talking about opening someone else's mail." "Maybe we should stop for a moment and consider the ethical implications here." "All done." "Keith?" "I'm home!" "Hey, Dr. Reid." "We accidentally opened your package, and felt so guilty we came by to install your..." ""Slide  Glide stripper pole"." "How did you get in there?" " Hooot cookies, anyone!" " Keith?" "Do you know how hard it is to install those things?" "Just be grateful." " You guys are gonna love this!" " Oh, yeah!" " Why did he take off his shirt?" " I don't know, Keith." "Itasa Scrubs Team proudly presents" "Scrubs Season 06 epiode 17 Their Stories VO subititles" "Transcript:" "JDsClone, Tania, Teorouge, Matters, gi0v3" "Sync: gi0v3, matters" "Revision: gi0v3" "I have a small low fat latte for Dr. Dorian." "What the hell, long face, we were here first." "Yeah, but Dr. D. is a king." "I didn't ask to be special, just kinda happened." "Still after six years of being a star around here," "I couldn't help of wonder what would be like if the spotlight were on some of my supporting players, for a change." " Jumbo coffee for Todd?" " Everything's Jumbo on the Todd." "It doesn't matter that is a dude, people should know: you're well endowed." " Cappuccino for Jordan?" " Give me that!" "Now, let's see who I can sit with that will drive me the least insane." "Ah, definitely not." "Oh, what a sweet moment." "I should ruin it." "Stop that!" "We're on me now." "Extra hot tea for Ted." "Ooh!" "He didn't give you a cardboard sleeve!" "Still don't rock the ball." "You don't want people staring." "Besides, how hot can it be..." "HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!" "HUGE MISTAKE!" "HUGE MISTAKE!" "Just keep moving." "No one saw that." "Naaah!" "Kelso." "What's going on?" "Hey, maybe it's the surprise party you've been waiting for your whole life." "Just, play it cool, Teddy boy." "The party man is here!" "It's not a surprise party, Ted." "It'll never be." "Nurse Espinosa and her chiquita nursitas are here because they want more dinero." "Dr. Kelso and his racism on." "We are not asking for much." "Just the basic cost of living raise." "No chance, pink pants." "Sir, the last thing we need" " is a strike!" " They'll never do it, Ted." "A strike will hurt the patients." "See?" "That's their biggest weakness." "They care about the patients." " This isn't over, Dr. Kelso." " Yeah, yeah, yeah!" "Scram." "Sir, they aren't asking for much and a little thing can make a big difference." "I know i'll be a lot happier with some extra cash, or friends, or hair." "How would your life be any different, if you had hair?" "Don't worry baby, you'll get your turn." "Which conditioner are you going to buy?" "Too many choices!" "Mum?" "Nooooo!" "Why do I have hair?" "Why?" "Why I have hair?" "Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?" "I wonder if they'd still do me after I buried mum!" " Rounds sucked today." " I know," "Dr. Wen didn't set me up once." "He never said bone, organ, suction." "I mean, I did what I could with "carpal tunnel", but i don't think people got that I was using that as a metaphore for vagina." "No, Todd," "I'm talking about when that intern asked me about cardiovascular instabilities?" "Pff... dude." "Turk 's bummed." "He definitely needs an high-five, but which one?" "Chin-up five?" "Tough-to-be-black five?" "Need-a-hug five - need-a-tug five?" "Wait!" "What's he talking about?" "Ok, just take the last one he says and add a five, dude." "...Oh, I dunno, it just all seems a little unfair." "Unfair five." "Thanks, mate." "You always" " have the right thing to say." " I work hard on this." "Excuse me, Dr. Quinlan?" " Who?" " That's you, Todd." "I just wanna thank you for helping with my daughter's condition." "It's hard enough being 16 and she shouldn't have to be teased by her classmates just because she looks so different." "I am glad to help, ma'am." "You are making a difference to her daughter's life." "What are you fixing, some type of major facial deformity?" "No, I'm giving her giant cans." "Okay!" "Uhm, have you ever heard the phrase "Excuse me"?" "Here, take the fake sugars, 'cause I hope you get cancer, I really do." "* Crowd disapproves *" "Well, my parents were mean to me." "* Crowd understands *" "Keith and I are always so busy that he suggested that we meet here for ten minutes before I should start for coffee, and for some together-time." "Is it not sweet?" "That may have been the most bored I have ever been whilst someone was talking to me." " She's ruining our coffee time." " Just pretend she's not here." "So, anyway, explain" "Uh, I hate everybody." "Oh, look at those two." "It must be the Beard of the Month Club." ""Mybeardis niceand white." "But my beard is more bushy."" ""Yeah, let's be friends." Morons." " I love you." " I love you too." "Wow, what the hell was that?" "Funny I told Keith I loved him?" "Now that you said what he wanted to hear, he doesn't have to work for it." "Let's say one guy is really trying to sleep with you." "When you finally give it up, do no more flowers." "Next thing you know, it's 20 years later, and you're standing over while he sleeps, your third Martini in one hand and a steak knife in the other." "And sure, he's taking his sleeping pills, so you can slice his arm open a little bit without waking him up." "But it's not satisfying, and you know why?" "Because you've lost the power." "Hey Per-Per!" "Did you figure out what happened to your arm?" "Nope." "Yes... phew... yes..." "Carla, can you pull a file for me?" "Sorry, I need another 5 hours to put this box of needles away." " I don't get it." " It's a slowdown, Ted." "The nurses think they're being clever." "Still treating patients, but with everything else moving more slowly." "And why are you standing here doing nothing?" "I know this is a slowdown, but I can't really work any slower than I normally do, so..." "I pretty much have to come to completely stop." "Now, if you're asking why I'm standing here, specifically, it's because I replaced that light bulb with a tanning bulb." "I'm tired of being the only white guy in my mosque." "You know what, if the nurses keep going on like this," "I'm going to get them their raise, but I'm going to pay for it by firing 3 of them." "The ugly ones, how does that sound?" "Whatever you think is right, sir." "You're an ass." "Ted, you idiot, you just said theout-loud thing in your head  and the in-your-head thing out loud!" "Don't make eye-contact, just keep moving!" "I'm sorry but that mother should not be giving her little girl a breast implant for her sweet sixteen present." "So she's sixteen." "What's the big deal, T.Do?" "Oh, I have a daughter..." "imagine being a parent." "Dad, can I talk to you?" "What's up?" "I don't want to wear a banana hammock anymore." "Rod... why?" "Because I stuff." "Wanna know a secret?" "I stuff too." "Yeah, you go." "I don't stuff." "Maybe you should." "You know what, I will just have a little conversation with your... department head." "All I'm saying is, it's not right, the girl's only sixteen." "Yeah, know, I felt the same way until her mother's cheque cleared." "Look, you're not even in my department, so maybe I'm missing something here, do... do you see any of your bees'wax here, beacuse I sure as hell don't," "Dr. Todd, do you see Dr. Turk's bees'wax?" "What the hell was he talking about?" "Todd, come." "Look, I know your buddy thinks he's the bee sneeze..." "What is it with this student beez?" "But if he keeps poking his nose in my business, I will torch him with every other department head in this place." "See how that ups his career." "Internal ohoh-five!" "Oh-oh!" "What took you so long?" "I need a drink!" "I'm so sorry, sweetheart, I was just with this super-rude patient, whose heart kept stopping." "He's dead now, but darn it all he should have known that my ex-wife was down here jonesing for a Cosmo." "You're so getting cut again, tonight." "I've got to get my jacket." "Already, Trish, I'm off to the movies with my boyfriend, who doesn't treat me any differently even though I've already said I loved him." " My name's not Trish." " Oh, that's ok." "It was for her benefit." " Hey sweetie." "Hey." " Oh." "Uhm, the guys are gonna play poker, is it ok if we skip the movie?" "Sure." "Oh, thanks babe." "Don't say anything." "Let the dark side draw her in." "Come on, come to mama." " Jordan, teach me." " Ok, it's simple." "If he thinks it's ok to mess with you, you just mess with him." "Done." "Ah, it's so fun to screw with someone's relationships." "And such a good practice for when my daughter grows up." " Still want someone..." "Who is heading down a bad path, I'd always try to stop them." "Carla, I think you should reconsider the slowdown." "Can't talk, Ted." "Julie and I have to carry this chart to this patient's room." "Of course there is nothing I can do." "If there is stubborn as Turk is..." "This isn't over man, I call she's not be having surgery." " Dude, you shouldn't screw with Dr.Green." " I'm not afraid of Dr.Green!" "Great!" "That just makes me want to..." "Laugh and laugh and laugh..." "I mean..." "look at him there by himself, probate him for frenzies." "Hey Keith!" "Where's Blondie?" "I thought it was your little coffee day time." "If she was mad about something, why wouldn't she just tell me?" "Now, I guess that, uh...once you've finally said I love you, all this insecure game might stop, you know?" "Bye, Jordan." "That did not give me the delicious, statisfied feeling I was going for." "Oh look, it's Keith." "Yeah, if he wants to talk to me he can find me, right?" "Right!" "Perry?" "I think there's something wrong with me." "Now that is the understatement of this still very young century." "I may have screwed up BlondeSteak's relationship, and now I have this really weird feeling." "It's called guilt, you Volcan." "And why in the hell are you giving up relationship advices, anyway?" "What are you, Oprah?" "Hi everyone!" "We're back, we're talking with Barbara, a cancer survivor, who went on to form her own headscarf company." " Tell us about that!" " When my hair fell out for the chemo..." "Not only is that a huge downer but scarves are tacky." "Instead, how about a dance with a little girl who looks just like me?" "Yeah!" "Right, look at us, we're like twins!" "Can you believe it?" "I would watch that show!" "Anyway, go fix this for me!" "Barbie can handle this on her own, she is an adult." "Aaah." "See Keith?" "I've been practicing and you're missing it." " Prrrr." " Where are my 12, 13 bucks?" "Ah." "Just send it to Keith, Lloyd!" "Oh!" "Come on!" "Oh!" "JD, Turk shouldn't mess with Dr.Green!" "Now, even though you're only his second best friend, for some reason he listens to you." "If Turk's mind is set on something, it can't be changed." "I can't even imagine how I'd try!" "Oh great." "There he goes off into his fantasy world." "Now I'm stuck here waiting until he snaps out of it with some weird comment." " We'd have to find a whole lot of gnomes!" " That's helpful." " Excuse me?" " Hold, one sec." "Got to make one of these." "Ah!" "Damn it!" " What are you aiming at?" " Nothing." "What's on your mind?" "Carla needs to end this slow down but she won't listen to me, people rarely do, would you talk to her?" "Yes!" "Nope, can't do it Ted." "If you piss her off, she's gonna turn on you and I can't have her digging off the skeletons in my closet, although technically there won't be skeletons for 6 days a week, right now there's just... dead badgers." "Ok, time to set things straight with the new bride." "Bug I straw heard!" " My parents were mean to me." " Oh, you don't need to say that," "I don't know what you were thinking..." "although I'm... sure that was lovely." "I need someone Turk will listen to." "Someone persuasive, forceful, sensitive." "Only my dong could talk." "Hey!" "I bet he'd listen to you!" "I've got to find a way to stop this slowdown before someone loses their job!" "The stress is killing me!" "You're sweating because you're under the tanning bulb, genius!" "If only the nurses have leverage, I could help them." "Ted, I found this extra box of needles in my truck." "Needles?" "There's a leverage." "Man, you keep this place toasty!" "So you wanted to talk to me?" "I'm about to speak to you from the heart, and since that's very difficult for me," "I need you to sit there silently while I mentally prepare myself." " Jordan, I have patients" " Shoo-shoosh!" "Sorry." "Todd, right now mean you the pop of my head but to have it up!" "This surgery ain't happening." "Now, one more watch!" "I always wanted to say that." "Before you do anything, just listen to what she has to say." "I want the implants." "Look, I'm constantly mistaken for a fifth grader, and I'm tired of it." "This is my choice." "It's taking me a long time to convince my mom, but... she's finally supporting me." "I shouldn't have to convince you, too." "What you buzzing around here for?" "Dr. Quinlan and I had to discuss something, that has absolutely nothing to do with anything that's happening up in here." "So... uhm... you were right, and... ok." "Huh, he's a buzzy little bee." "Dude..." "I gotta ask, what's with you and bees?" "What are you thinking, Ted?" "I could jam this through the soft spot on his temple, then slit my wrists with it before anyone got in here to stop me." "The usual, sir." "Well, you'd never do it." "You don't have the guts!" "If it's okay with you, we'll take that raise now." "Okay, but in this little fantasy of yours, can I not have prostate problems anymore?" "I can't sleep more than forty minutes without needing to take a weez." "Unfortunately for you, somebody left the invoice for the hospital needles on my desk." "They're really undercharging you!" "So... either you shell out the extra twenty grand a month for our raises, or... we'll call the needle company and it'll cost you twice that." "Ted, are you responsible for this?" "Please, sir..." "I don't have the guts!" "Oh, yeah!" "Suck it, bitch!" "I will murder you!" "I don't know why I messed with your head." "Di-di-did you start talking?" "'Cause I should brush my teeth." "At first I thought, I was just being mean, 'cause you know I enjoy the misery of others." "It's not really a secret." "Whenever I see someone in love," "I just lose it and turn into an awful person." "Give yourself a break, Jordan." "Your parents were really mean to you." "Here's the big secret: they weren't." "They were actually very supportive." "I don't know how this happened." "Look, Elliot, I'm a woman in her very very very late 30s, who has problems opening herself up to love." "I hate being vulnerable." "I still play mindgames," "Hell, to make Perry feel inadequate, sometimes I fake NOT having orgasms." "Huh." "The point is... if you wanna be happy, you should never ever listen to me." "You maybe also wanna say you're sorry?" " I do not." " Hmm." "Come on." "I'm sorry." "I was such a jerk." "I love you." "Even though I caused it, it still feels mildly heart-warming to fix someone's problems." " Hm!" "Aw." " Sir." "That's why I'm glad I kept Turk from messing up his career." "And I don't care if the nurses ever find out that it was me who helped them." "* Nurses happily chatting *" "I guess we all have our parts to play." "I guess we all have our parts to play." "I guess we all have our parts to play." "Ok, I have a coffe for Snoop Dogg Resident." "I wish just one, someone, would call me Ronald." "Where I parked my truck?" "Bees... bees... bees." "* We hear all people's thoughts *"