"Although the writers took great liberties with the numbers given by scientists, especially pertaining to the speeds and distances which might involve the laws of relativity, the adventure told in this movie is based on a true scientific idea." "Excuse me, officer, is this the Scientific Institute?" " Yes, Sir." " I'm a guest at the inauguration." " Hurry up, you're the last to arrive." " Somebody has to be." "We want to celebrate with this small party the journey into the stratosphere of our two young balloonists and astronomers," "Robert and Françoise Monier." "I can see in their departure a symbol of the eternal youth of science, and I'm especially glad that unknown areas in our universe will be visited on our behalf by so gracious ambassadors." "Our two friends are also, as you know, just married." "Eight days ago, we wished them to be happy, today we wish them to succeed." "In order to commemorate this first stratospheric ascension organized by our Institute, we wanted to plant this tree which will grow as will the glory of our young scientists!" "Their tree is planted at last." "The guy doesn't seem to know that they're going away tomorrow." "Can't you understand?" "No." "I understand when people talk, not when they bark." "We said 93 degrees." "You're to blame if it boiled." "If you think the future of science is jeopardized because it boiled..." "No, I think that, because it boiled, I'll be in trouble." " And Mr. Lucien doesn't like trouble?" " No, Mr. Lucien doesn't like trouble" "Mr. Lucien enjoys a nice, quiet family life between his wife..." " And his children." " Right." "Oh, by the way, any news?" "Oh, Henri, old boy, don't make me think of it: it's for today." "My wife left for the hospital this morning, I'm waiting for a phone call." "So don't get on my nerve, OK?" "Don't get on my nerves!" " Well, hurrah for Family, right?" " Yes, yes, hurrah for Family." "You wouldn't leave for the stratosphere, now, would you?" "Certainly not, old boy." "Journeys are not for me." "It's their thing." "Their job." "To go and see what's going on up there." "They're scientists." "And I'm not a scientist, no Sir." "Therefore:" "I'll have a rest." "Well this is very good, man, very good:" "it will look at once scientific and intimate." "Hey, you there, the gondola is ready, you should install the electroscopes." "Of course, old boy, I'm responsible for the electroscopes." "You don't have to yell that way." "Come on, open up your cheese, so I can put this inside." " Oh, here's the balloonist." " Perish the thought!" "What a weird idea to go on honeymoon in this thing!" " And so convenient!" " That's a scientist's idea." " More like..." " More like a madman's idea." "Come on, give me that." "And what?" "With this contraption, they'll go 15 or 16 thousand metres up." "Which means they'll be 15 kilometres from their home." "Above it, granted, but when all is said and done, it's like going on honeymoon in the suburbs of your hometown." "Even if the lady is understanding, it's cheap." "And now, my dear friends, after we elevated our hearts and minds," "I invite you to come and toast the success of our endeavour and the happiness of our newlyweds." "Françoise!" "Our tree." " It has grown already, in the last ten minutes." " Yes, and we grew older too." "Oh, just a little, and we still have so much to do." " Do you love me?" " I think so." " Why "I think so"?" " Because I'm sure." " What about this journey?" " What about it?" " Do you love it too?" " Oh, yes, yes." "First because we'll be together, and we wanted it together, planned it together." "Do you remember, Françoise, the great evenings we had in the laboratory?" " Our months of work?" " We didn't work all the time." "That's true but you shouldn't tell anybody." "Anyway, it was all conceived in joy, wasn't it?" "And sometimes in elation, which is even better." " Darling..." " What?" "Don't you think it's rather silly to go in the stratosphere for one's honeymoon?" " Well..." " Won't people make fun of us?" " They probably will." " Good!" " Isn't it?" " Yes." "And the two of us will be so well, up there, won't we?" "Out of the world." "Far from the world." " You don't like this world much, do you?" " No, not much." " You don't either, by the way?" " No." "It's like our tree." "It's doing everything it can to get away from the world." "Going up, up..." "Trees are always right." " What is it?" " Nothing." " I think they're finished with the tree." " Alright, I'm going then." "Well, now I'm going to have a drink." " Oh, did anybody call from the hospital?" " No, Dad." "Oh, how happy I am!" "What a beautiful journey you're going to undertake." "And don't you two make for a nice couple, a beautiful pair of scientists." " Will you allow me?" " Of course." "Up to the ceiling!" " That bodes well for our ascension." " To our lovers' health." " To the success of your journey!" " And to the health of the stratosphere." " And now, Robert, a speech!" " Oh, no!" " Yes, yes, a speech!" " You do it." "No, I won't." "You do it." "Well, you asked for it." "Here it is." "My dear friends, I hate ceremonies." "Yes, but, I like this one a lot." "Bravo!" "Good!" "Bravo!" "How cute the two of them are." "Here's to science!" "That's the hospital." "Hello?" "Oh?" "The envelope of your balloon, sir." "Oh?" "Hello?" "OK, I'll be there directly." "Friends, you know that we're leaving tomorrow morning." "So, Françoise, I'll drive the envelope to Pavilion C then I come back for you." " So?" "Were you able to load them?" " I couldn't load more than that." "It will do." "Let's go." "Here it is: six hours to prepare, fifteen minutes to rejoice, then two hours to take it all down." "Two hours, do you realize?" "The party's been over for two hours and we're still busy taking things down." "Over or not, it was one hell of a party." "Well, you can see what parties are worth!" "Oh, old boy, it's pleasing anyway." "You think only of pleasure, but it costs a lot of money." " You think only of money." " Everybody does." "I'm just admitting it." "Oh, speaking of that, I'll tell you something." "In order to win a lot of money." "It works all the time." "Give me ten francs." "What's this new trick?" "Here are your ten francs." " Thanks." " So what now?" "So what now?" "Well, that's all." "I won ten francs." "That's the whole trick." "I always thought you would become a financier." " So did I." " Oh, here you are, Mr. Lucien." " Yes." " Here is the barograph for the gondola." " You're responsible for this, aren't you?" " Yes." "Yes." " So, what about the baby?" " I'm waiting, I'm waiting for him." " He should arrive any minute." " All will be well." "You see: he says all will be well, and he's a graduate from Polytechnique." "He's got eight of them already, they come to him like telegrams, but I..." "I can tell you it makes me sick." "Such a day destroys me, what with organizing a party, outfitting the stratospheric gondola, perfecting pieces of equipment, growing a tree, and to top it all, my child is just about to be born." " No, no, old boy, that's too much." " You're so nervous." "Of course not, I'm not nervous." "I'm really the quiet type." "Well, gentlemen, what's up?" "What about my barograph?" "I had it brought here." "The problem is Antoine: he never stops talking." "Hello?" "The hospital?" "It's the hospital, Oh, my God!" "Yes..." "Is it a boy?" "An..." "An accident?" "A car accident." "Mr. Robert Monier has been injured." " Oh, its... it's for you." " Hello?" "What is it?" "Robert?" "Robert..." " Do you need anything more?" " No, thank you." "And here we are!" "Serves me well for climbing in the back of a lorry like a kid." "When they make such cozy stratospheric balloons." "I won't be healed before more than one month." "Really, Françoise, now it's over." "Over?" "It's not possible, Robert." "We'll wait... we'll postpone..." "No, no, Françoise, you mustn't be sad and you mustn't be angry." "You know as well as I do that our journey is ready, it's been announced." "Right now, the conditions are optimal." "In eight days, it would be too late." "No, this journey must happen." "And it will." " But, Robert, you can't..." " No, you're right, I can't." "Well, others than us, my darling." "And it's all my fault." " I'm sorry, Françoise." " It's not possible, Robert." "This is our journey, our own adventure, our own beginning." " Please, Françoise." " It is true." " You're right." "I'll go alone." " What?" "And it will be as if we were together." "Nobody, Robert, nobody will cheat me out of this journey." " You're crazy..." " Why?" "Didn't we prepare everything together, plan everything, calculate everything?" "Yes, I know that, but I..." "Are you implying that I don't know as much as you do about the matter?" " You pretentious girl." " Or that I'd be afraid on my own?" "But, Françoise, my darling, I'll be afraid, not you." "That I'd lean out of the window?" "You can't go alone." "You'd need..." "I don't know..." "An assistant." " Well, someone to maneuver the gondola." " I'll accept that." "A helper is all right." "But nothing more." "Oh, dear Mr. Monier!" "I'm so happy!" "Oh, excuse me, how are you?" "Not too bad, Lucien, my boy, thank you." "What about you?" "Thank you, I've got a son." " No?" " Yes, and a big one it is." "Eight pounds, or so they told me." "And he looks like me, well everybody says so, oh God!" "How happy I am!" "Oh, but... by the way, what about your... your ascension?" " I'll go alone." " Oh, alone?" "Well, not exactly." "I'll go with you." "Oh?" "Oh, no, no Mrs. Monier, you can't do this to me." "Do you understand, baby boy?" "Going away like this doesn't look nice, it grieves your mommy, I could feel it." "But I'm doing it for you, so you'll explain to her tomorrow morning, so she understands well." "A wonderful thing is happening to me." "I'll make you a name, and I'll make you some money." "Later you'll be glad." "Of course, I'd rather stay here with you, because I love both of you." "And, you know, between you and I, Daddy... shhh... he's a little frightened." "But you mustn't tell anybody." "I swear I couldn't refuse anyway." "I swear to you, baby boy, that I couldn't refuse." "There..." "And you'll understand." "You'll understand when you grow up." "And be real good." "Daddy will bring back a star for you." "And a feeding bottle from the Milky way." "There." "Just wait till he comes back." "He won't be long." "And give a kiss to your mommy." "You kiss her, OK?" " You see, everything is as fine as can be." " At the hospital too?" "I'm sure it is." "Excuse me, I mustn't think of it too much." " So?" "Are you happy to go?" " No, no, I'm not happy." "I'm proud." " And are you OK?" " No, old boy, I'm not OK at all." "I couldn't sleep at all and the local bar makes a terrible coffee with cream." "And getting up so early tires me." "I'm cold." "Why didn't you postpone the launch?" "What about the hygrometric conditions in the atmosphere?" "What about them?" "All in all, you're a hero of science?" "No, old boy, I'm sensitive to cold." "Oh, damn, what a start?" "Madam, mister Director, please, it won't be long." "Excuse me, I don't have the time." "But I can tell you that I slept very well and that everything is looking good." " Is that enough?" " Almost too much." "Oh!" "You're Mrs. Monier's travelling companion?" " Yes, sir..." " A last minute interview." " Did you sleep well too?" " Very well, Sir, I slept very well." "And what do you expect to bring back from your ascension?" "I can't tell you that, Sir." "It's a laboratory secret." "But your hopes are high?" "Well, anyway, Sir, I prepared something for you." "Here." "This is a small ID photo." "Or, if you prefer, I've got this one, where I am on my bicycle." "Or this other one, where I was in the country with my wife." " Well, you just keep them all." " Thanks." " Goodbye." " Goodbye." " Well, Lucien, are you OK?" " I'm OK, I'm OK..." "What you're doing is really swell." "We won't forget it." " I certainly hope so." " Come on, Lucien." "And lo!" "Into the ball..." "Antoine!" "Antoine!" "Here!" "Take it to her today..." "Well, Antoine, what do you think of our friend Lucien?" " Good things, Mr. Director, good things." " Indeed." "He's dedicated." "Yes, he's ambitious." " Are you OK, Lucien?" " Oh, now I'm OK." "The hardest thing is to leave, but after that... you know... one must cope..." " How quiet, isn't it?" " Yes it is." "Don't you think we're really cozy here?" "There's nothing to complain about." "It doesn't shake, we're well suspended..." "Well, we're even suspended a little too much but, what to say?" "We're well suspended..." "Shall I drop a little more ballast?" " No, that is enough." " Too bad." "It was fun." " What shall I do?" " Nothing, thank you, Lucien." "Don't you have anything more for me to do?" " No, thank you, Lucien." " Cause it would keep me busy." " You'd like to tinker all the time." " No, I'm just the active type." "Well... anyway..." "Oh..." "Oh, how dead it is around here." "The deader it is, as you put it, the more interesting it is." "Oh, I'm not holding it against you." "All right, I'll send the first message." "All is well." "No opposition?" "Oh, no." "Oh, no, no." " And since then?" " Since then, they've reached a ceiling." "The third message was sent at 5 p. m." "It said they were at 22.000 metres." "The record is clearly beaten." "Nobody could do better." "Françoise is working and they'll be back down very soon." " We'll be able to go back down very soon." " Will we?" " You're going to see him again." " Who?" "Well, you just told me him." "Can you believe something strange happens to me?" " What?" " I don't even know his name." "It seems the temperature's not as cold as it was earlier." "I said: it seems the temperature's not as cold as it was earlier." " I opened this..." " What the..." "I opened this a little, just a little, and also, I touched this." "This!" " You disturbed the electric compass." " And this gizmo too." "Oh, dear, what a mess you got us in." "I think we're lost." "Lost?" "Oh, no, no, don't say that word." "It's already such a pain in the ar... ar..." "the side to be inside a ball, so if we've got this as well, you get the picture." "No, no, no..." "First, where are we?" "At more than 90.000 metres." "At 200 miles, that's 1000 kilometres." " 1000 kilometres." " And still going up." " Lucien, we're lost." " We're lost?" "Why the big words, right away?" "No, Mrs. Monier, no, we're not lost..." "Perchance, we've just been mislaid." " I feel limp all over..." " I think I do too." " Are you limp too?" " Yes, Lucien, I feel very light." " Where are you going?" " I couldn't say." "Oh, here I am climbing walls now." " I feel just like a bird." " We're going to fall down, Lucien." "Fall down?" "Just try to!" "We can stand up in every direction." "Now this is really rich." "It's impossible to fall over in your contraption." "Stop it, this is absurd." "You're making me dizzy." "You can't blame me if the floor is going up to the ceiling." "I'm definitely limp all over." "Limp all over." "Limp." "Of course, we're now escaping Earth's attraction." "There's no gravity anymore." "Oh, my poor Lucien, you've done a great job indeed." " Well, it's all your fault." " Mine?" "You shouldn't have gotten me into this." "Am I an astronomer?" "Am I a balloonist?" "I could have lived at the side of a good, all new, eight pounds kid, but no!" "I had to come and clown around in a ball, between the Moon and..." "what do you call the big blue one?" " Vega." " That's it: between the Moon and Vega." "And pray, what do I look like, between the Moon and Vega?" "And all of it happened because you wanted to smoke a cigarette." " I?" " Yes, you." "I?" "I?" "You know, Mrs. Monier, what with your stopped gravity," " at least I'd have learned something." " What?" "I always wondered how flies could walk on walls... now I understand." " Flies won't ever impress me again." " No, this has nothing to do with it." "Oh, well, never mind." "You and I will never see flies again anyway." "Look: your cigarette is wandering on its own." "Oh, between the stars, you can pick up cigarette butts from the air." "It's not a cigarette, it's an acrobat." "Good." "Now you're reacting the right way." "It's no use." "They're not answering anymore." "Two days look bad." "Dear listeners, it's been now eight days since the courageous balloonists sent their last message, and given their long silence, unfortunately, it now seems all hope is lost." "I'm fed up with it." "I really am." "Poor Lucien, how I regret that I dragged you into..." "Of course not, Mrs. Monier." "I opened the porthole, you did something bad too, well, what to say?" "We're even." " Are you very angry with me?" " Oh, excuse me, I can't help it." "To think that I didn't see my kid for fifteen days..." "I didn't even see him grow." "He cries at night, and I can't hear him." "If we only could play belote." "But you can't play belote." " You could teach me." " We don't have any cards." " All in all, we don't have anything." " Yes." "We're not even hungry." "We are air castaways, for God's sake." "Air castaways are hungry." "We've read about it in every book." "Well, no, no, we're not even hungry." "We don't strain our muscles so we're not burning energy." "Yes but it would really kill time to have a bite." "If we were hungry, we would be long dead," " since we had so few supplies on board." " Yes, but starving is one thing, killing time is another." "I'm just saying." "No, really, it's always the same thing." "I can't understand." "All our observations yield results which are not false but unexpected... impossible, absurd results, as if, all of a sudden, two plus two equaled five and straight lines turned around." "Do you understand?" "Open the trapdoor." "Hold your breath!" "Close the trapdoor!" "Take the controls" "We need to get it stable." "So, are we still going up?" "No, we're going down, but somewhat too fast." " Let's drop some ballast." " No, no, don't touch that." "I'm opening the parachute." " We're saved." " Saved!" "Oh, gravity!" "What did you do?" "The same things that you did when you sent us up there, but in the reverse." "Oh, so I found the trick!" " Well, look up there!" " What the hell are you doing?" " What about you?" " Don't you have a ladder so we can come down?" " They're dense, aren't they?" " Yes." "Where are you coming from?" "Well, I'd really like to get out of this anyway." " So, is it suitable?" " No." "An elevator would be better." "Thank you, sir, thank you, very decent of you." "Yes, go on, please." "My turn now." "Sorry." "Oh, boy." " Can't you help the lady down?" " Who are you?" "The balloonists from the stratospheric ascension." " As if you didn't know about it." " Well, no, I don't." " First, where are we?" " In Monkey country." "Oh, great, we landed in Africa." "What a drag." "Hey..." "We... go up... balloon..." "very far... we accident... we great scientists..." "we want to go, er..." "Paris." "Paris..." "Hey..." " Say, is Paris far from here?" " About sixty kilometres." " How can we get there?" " If you want, you're lucky:" "I was about to leave." "I've got my old car." "Good." "Come on." "It's old but it always gets me where I want to go." "Thank you: we're coming with you." "And, please, let nobody touch the balloon or the machines." "I'm counting on you." "Oh, here..." "This isn't currency anymore, is it?" "Oh, I remember, I knew these in the old days." "What's this contraption?" "It wasn't here yesterday night." "We don't know." "It just fell down." "Weird." "It looks like the balloons they made in the old days." " What is it?" "This is wonderful." " Don't go near it." "Who are you?" " A reporter." " What's this?" "It's last year's card." " We're in 67 if memory serves." " I know." "But it's the only one I have here." " What do you want?" " I'd like to see the balloon up there." " This is none of your business." " Do you know what I think?" "It might be the balloon that got lost twenty-five years ago." "Twenty-five years in the air?" "Come on, move along." "My father covered the event in 1942, he often told me about it." " Oh, this... this would be a gas." " Don't stay here, Sir." "Hello?" "The bullpen?" "Three, two, one, zero." "A strange event just occurred, sixty kilometres from Paris..." "This is the right spot, Lucien, we're not mistaken." " This is the same street." " No, we're not mistaken." "There's a door." "Let's go in." " The tree, Lucien." " Oh, yes." "How it's grown!" "But what's going on?" "I don't know." "I'm even more frightened that I was up there." "Oh, the plaque!" "There's my name on it." "Look, Lucien, how stupid are those dreams where you really think you're not dreaming." "That's it." "That's it." "Hey, you, there." "What are you looking for?" " Mr. Robert Monier." " The director." "Mr. Robert Monier." "That's what I'm saying:" "the director." "First floor." " Here?" " Yes." "Oh, sorry, Sir." "Oh, excuse me, I wanted to see Mr. Monier." " Françoise..." " I'm looking for Mr. Robert Monier." "But it's..." "But it is I, Françoise." "Oh, no, no, don't joke, it's..." "It's a dream?" "Oh, I'd like to wake up!" "No, don't touch me!" "No, it's not a dream, Françoise." "I dreamed about you too often." "This time, I know it's not a dream." "Come on, don't be afraid." "Am I afraid?" " Oh, dear, wrong floor." " Yes..." " yes, you are Robert." " And you are Françoise." "How you changed." "You left twenty-five years ago, Françoise." "Twenty-five years..." "Oh dear, wrong year." "Twenty-five years..." "Twenty-five years..." "They're crazy!" "Say something, do something." "What's going on?" "What's going on, Françoise, what's happening to us is extraordinary and absurd." "But I know it's true." "This is I. And this is you." "Oh, what a joke!" "What a horrible joke!" " How funny!" "Oh, this is too funny ..." " Oh, come on, don't laugh, Françoise," " don't laugh like that..." " But I'm not laughing, Robert," " I'm not laughing..." " Yes, but now, we've got to understand." "Let's see." "What happened?" "I want to know." "Tell me." "Oh, Robert..." " Twenty-five years..." " So, did you see Mr. Monier?" "How should I know?" "He asks if I saw Mr. Monier." "And you, did you see me?" "Did you only see me?" "How old are you, to begin with?" "How old is he?" "How old is he?" "Does the sky send special correspondents too?" "Strange balloon lands 60 kilometres from Paris." "Are its passengers the two explorers who disappeared 25 years ago?" "Incredible Return." "Did Françoise Monier and Lucien Marchand who disappeared 25 years ago during a stratospheric exploration come back down?" "You may take your papers back." "You're free to go." "What did I tell you?" "Certificate of innocence." "Goodbye." " So long." "Now we've seen everything." " He got out of it." "I'll get him again." "There's 25 years before the statute of limitations apply." "Twenty-five years?" "Twenty-five years?" "Yes, yes, twenty-five years." "But who... who... who talked about it?" "Twenty-five years?" "Who's this bloke?" "A madman who doesn't remember how old he is." "Oh, I don't remember how old I am, don't I?" "I don't remember, I don't remember..." "Look!" "See if I don't remember how old I am." "I don't remember?" "I don't remember?" "What to say, officer?" "We went up, we got lost for some time, then we went back down." "Yes, you'll have to find something else." "You just read the newspapers from two weeks ago." "There's my name, my picture, everything..." "I really could become crazy, officer." "I'm coming back from God's thunder and I don't recognize the people... nobody..." "The small tree became a tall oak..." "The whole world is mad." "And I'm being arrested, taken to the police station, because I'm mad?" "Well, no!" "No!" " Hey!" " What?" " Where did you find these papers?" " In my pocket." "They're mine." " Is this your date of birth?" " Yes, I've got only one of those." " You insist that these papers are yours?" " So what?" "I regret to tell you that you died 25 years ago." " I needed just that." " What's the problem?" "Nothing." "A dead man passing out." "Françoise!" "Françoise, I think I've got it." "I think I understand." "If it's true, it's unbelievable." "You see, your balloon spent two weeks out of the terrestrial world." "So you lived for two weeks in the sidereal world." " I don't understand." " You will, darling, it's crystal clear." " You went up, then you went back down." " Yes." "And, in the meantime, you changed systems of reference." "You lived for two weeks in another time." " Lorentz's formulas?" " Yes, Lorentz's formulas." "Lorentz's equations do apply to their full extent." "Oh, this is magnificent." "Twenty-five years..." "You understand: your balloon went so far, so fast that you got out of the solar system." "So you spent two weeks up there." "Two weeks... for you." "But, meanwhile, our poor Earth got twenty-five years older." "And your poor husband got twenty-five years older too." " But is it true, Robert, is it possible?" " It may not be possible, but it's true." "And during all that time, you..." "During that time, I waited for a miracle." " And you're bringing me two of them." " Two?" "The first one is that your journey confirms all the theories" " of relativity, but that's nothing." " What about the second one?" "The other miracle..." "is that you came back." " Can you believe it?" " I have to believe it since you're here." " You waited for me." " Yes, Françoise." "In this house, where we prepared everything together." "Here is your house, Françoise, your house that you do not know." "I remember the other one." "The first one." "The one where we lived for just a few days." "The most beautiful days." "It was yesterday." "No, not for me, Françoise." "Without you, I got older." "Without me, you stayed young as ever." "Beautiful as ever." "My poor Robert." "Were you bored without me?" "Françoise..." "I was alone, but I wasn't without you." " My bedroom." " Yes, Françoise, your bedroom." "It stayed just like it was on the first day." "I changed houses thrice:" "in every one of them, your bedroom slept beside me." "You know, Françoise, I now feel as if I always knew that you would return." "I thought so much..." "so much about you." "Do you know what grieves me, darling?" "I only had fifteen days to think about you." "And you'll never catch up on me." "I got ahead of you for our whole life." "What is that?" "Long Live the Earth!" "Long Live Science!" "Long Live the Balloonists!" "On the balcony!" "On the balcony!" " It's for you, Françoise." " For me?" "Of course." "You're a hero now, darling." " So they know already?" " Everything goes very fast nowadays." " You must go." " Oh..." " Yes, yes, you must." "Come on." " Another time.." " Go, go." "You coward." "Come, Robert, come!" "No!" "I assure you, I've accomplished nothing." " I can't do this alone." " Come on, I'm no star." " Where is Lucien then?" " Oh, that..." "The mysterious balloon:" "a miracle or a hoax?" "Will Lucien Marchand be arrested?" "The mysterious "envoys from the sky"" "insist that they are Françoise Monier and Lucien Marchand." " And what became of Antoine?" " Oh, Antoine didn't waste his time." "He's got more millions than he's got hairs." "He became a financier." "I always said he would." "Yes." "You would have been well-advised to do the same thing." " Yes." " Yes." "Take off your hands, will you?" "What to say?" "I've got simple tastes." "My job." "My family." "Your family." "Talk about it." "Yes, I know, It looked like I let the two of you down," " you and the kid..." " Well, don't let your hands down." " Yes..." " Get them up." "But now it's over:" "I'll get my job back at the institute." " I'm sure they kept it for me." " Your job?" "But it's the kid's now." "Isn't it, André?" "Yes, it's mine now." "Hey, come on, come on, you're talking to your father." "You can't blame him for anything." "André always was a very good son." " Haven't you, little one?" " They can hire another assistant." "Yes but, what with the new machines, you won't understand anything." "You'll show me." "That's true, you could work with your father on a trial basis." " Oh, no, no." " Mind your wool." "Hey, you're not going to criticize me, are you?" "No, Georgette, I'm not criticizing." "Because, it would really be the limit if you criticized me... who slaved for twenty-five years like the miserable woman I was." "Now the kid is working, but in the beginning..." " The institute paid you a pension." " I should say they'd better do it and they're liable to cancel it," " now that you're back." "Or so they say." " What do you mean: so they say?" "It all looks rather fishy to me." "You were lucky, anyway, not to find your place taken and seven more kids in this very house." "Oh, no, Georgette, you're hurting my feelings." " Am I or am I not a widow?" " Of course not." "André." "Are you a widow's son." "I'm not taking the words out of his mouth." "What you're doing is wrong:" "now my son will rise against me." "Don't talk about rising now." "This is really the wrong time!" "The bogus ascension was of course a hoax." "Explorers?" "No: crooks." "The stratospheric balloon was just a trial balloon." " Oh, look." " Yes, I was expecting this." " They refuse to believe." " They can't believe." " It's understandable, isn't it?" " I don't blame them, you know." "But now that it's all so clear, so obvious, we could do it again tomorrow." " No, it's too good for them." " Nothing is too good for man." " They would like to believe it." " They do not dare." "Oh, stop it, stop it!" "I'm telling you I went there!" "Are you calling me a liar?" "Oh, come on, he didn't mean to hurt your feelings." "Hurt my feelings?" "Didn't he call me an astral quack?" "Yes or no?" " It was a joke." " A joke." "Well, Sir, when you go up in the Milky Way... yes, yes!" "It's not to make people laugh!" "Or let yourself be called names..." "by anybody!" " All right..." "All right..." " Don't get excited." "I'll get excited if I want to." "To risk your life for the sake of science and be called an acrobat!" " OK, OK, we thought you understood." " Understood what?" "Understood that we understood." "Your little story is OK for a while but don't overdo it." " But I swear..." " Sorry." "First, do you have witnesses?" " Yes, I have one." " You have a witness?" "Yes, I have a witness." "Absolutely!" "I've got a witness." "One of my friends was there when we went up!" "And he's not just anybody." "I'm going to fetch him, because it can't... it just can't go on like this." "Out of my way!" "Coup de Théâtre." "Eminent scientists confirm the miracle." "The two balloonist are indeed the ones who left Earth 25 years ago." "The first interstellar cruise will be followed by others." "Antoine, my lad, you're a great businessman," " but with me, you're such a skinflint." " A skinflint?" "Come on, Gaby!" "Oh, I love you anyway, but I'm an honest Gaby." "So, when I need money, whom do you want me to ask for it?" " Oh, I see, the poet was right." " What did the poet say?" "He said: " Woman is a sensitive, delicate, charming being... who keeps on asking for money. "" "Please, Gaby, leave me alone." "I must see a visitor anyway." "Good old Lucien." "Antoine, you old rascal." " You haven't changed." " Neither have you." "Oh, I, you know..." "Well, you shrank a little and lost a few feathers but, other than that, you do look the same." "So nice of you." "My friend Lucien." "You know:" "the space navigator." "Is it true, sir, that you got an extra 25 years?" " Yes." " How lucky you are." "I can leave, you probably have business to discuss." " Oh, you may feel free to leave." " Next time, you'll take me with you, Sir." " But I won't leave again." " Who knows?" "Goodbye." "Goodbye." "And mind the doors, because you could get... pinched." " So you came to tell me your story?" " Oh, yes." "Well, old boy, imagine that..." "No, don't bother, I know it all." "News travel fast nowadays." "First, I thought it was a hoax." "In business, you've got to be careful." "But professor Monier immediately put my mind at rest." " You saw him?" " Of course." "This whole thing might have held a business venture." "A gold mine is enclosed in any new idea, if you know how to exploit it." "That's what us, financiers, are good at:" "finding what can attract gulls." "And just imagine: to leave the Earth, not getting old anymore, we'll have a lot of clients for that particular adventure." " Well, yes, I came to..." " To convince me?" " Yes I did, yes." " Just wait: you'll see." " Hello, Lucien." " Hello." "Oh:" "Oh how happy I am!" "Gentlemen, we must act quickly." "Mr. Monier, our scientific director, gave me his final report." "We do agree, don't we, Mr. Monier?" "You're taking full responsibility?" " Absolutely." " The journey can be made?" " I made it." " And so did I." "Somewhat by chance, wasn't it?" "We perfected that chance." "Today, the journey is not only possible but easy." " Of course it is." " Good." "What about the site?" "The deal is concluded:" "I'll sign tonight." "Good." "The site is OK." "The blueprints of the gondola?" "Here they are." "Here are all the blueprints that we studied." "The command center." "The pilot house." "The engines room." "Major, this is your department." "And what about interior fittings?" "Of course the cabins are a bit cramped but we needed to save space." "I had a great idea:" "I remove the parachute closets we talked about:" "in every cabin, the parachute will simply double as a pillow." "This saves a lot of space and the passenger feels more secure." "Should a disaster occur during the night..." "Who said anything about disasters?" "The pilot house..." "Did you see it?" "Do you think it's adequate?" "That's what we're looking at." " It will be cozier than the first time." " Indeed it will." "But if anything is wrong in that respect, do not hesitate to say so." "Such an endeavour mustn't neglect the technical aspect." " Of course." " Well, you see what I mean." "Oh, I don't like this bar of yours." "It doesn't make me thirsty." "Oh, come on, no, this is far too serious a cabin for two." "My clients won't go up there to find the same things they can see at home." " No, no, you must throw in some poetry." " What don't you like?" "Well, well, you see what I mean..." "poetry..." " something cheerful and cozy... things..." " Oh..." "Yes, curvy things... well, poetry." "Right." "Now the models of the station." "How is it going?" " What do you think?" " What is this?" " The station." " This is a station?" " This is supposed to be a station?" " What do you think?" " Well, I must admit..." " Do you want to know what I think." " I think this is terrible!" " Oh?" "But what don't you like?" "What I don't like is that it still looks far too much like a station." " But..." " No!" "If we go this way, we'll end up building streetcars for the suburbs." "This is absolutely not what I want." "None of you seem to understand one thing:" "what am I going to sell people?" "I'm going to sell them a miracle." "I'm going to sell them time." "Time by the metre." "I'm going to tell them:" ""Are you bored on the Earth?" "Do you have problems?" "Are you sick of it all, are you scared of getting old?" "Well... come aboard my gondola and, in the space of fifteen days, you'll save thirty years. "" "So, for such an adventure, if we don't invent something that will grip people's eyes, ears, heart and enthusiasm!" "our business is done for!" "Or rather, it's a business like any other!" "And if it comes to that, I'd rather organize first flights for big families or Sunday excursions in the country." "The stars, for Pete's sake!" "Will you think of the stars!" "Your station must be like a huge sucker that will suck people in, do you get it?" "It must smell of more than a departure, it must smell stronger, it must stink of disappearance, of absence, of cavorting between planets." "It must be cheerful while all stations are grim." "It must move, it must jump." "And I tell you there's going to be singing in it." "There will be music." "And I don't want porters to be men but women, and pretty ones too!" "Well, look, my dear Antoine, I wonder..." "I wonder if we're not shooting for something too big." " Too great?" " No, I did say big." " Too big." "Yes, I don't know if it's really necessary..." "I'm somewhat shocked to see the stars advertised like shoeshine." "Mr. Monier, let us be blunt." "You explore, I exploit." "All right?" " All right?" " All right." "All right." "And get ready for a grand show!" "Sidereal Station." "You leave for fifteen days, and come back after thirty years." "What is your space?" "Barriers, walls, limits!" "We bring you freedom!" "Go up!" "Space is yours." "Earth is too small." "You think your flat is too small?" "No, the town is too small for the house, the country is too small for the town, Earth is too small for men!" "Enlarge!" "Grow!" "Go up!" "We offer you a journey through the sky and beyond the sky." "You'll be free." "You'll fly in the great estates of the universe." "No more pressure, no more kilometres, no more metric system!" "Go up to the virgin territories where the signs of the Zodiac turn around like a glistening merry-go-round, where constellations, comets and fireballs dance their ballet of flame and glory." "Up there, the universe is going round to the sound of incredible music." "Up there, you'll see our Earth's sister planets." "You'll see Mercury, you'll see Venus, where everyone would like to live for the sake of its name." "You'll see Mars, the fierce red star." "You'll see Jupiter, surrounded by its lightning bolts." "You'll see Saturn and it's fiery ring." "You'll see Uranus, Neptune and Pluto." "You'll see the Sun, a volcano blistered with volcanoes, a self-devouring world of fire." "You'll see the Milky Way, slide of the Heavens and a trough for space horses." "You'll see shooting stars glide into this world of light like shining balls in the nocturnal tennis of the abyss!" "You'll see the fireworks of meteors and fireballs, the sizzling of stars being born, the last flare of dying stars." "So now leave and travel though space!" "You fear time because you didn't know how to take it." "But now it's over." "Thanks to us, you'll put time in your pocket and get it out one piece at a time like small change." "The time that you spend on Earth is a small gnawing insect flexing its mandibles and devouring you." "You don't have the time to live anymore." "Hours turn, dance and evade you." "The pendulum of the hours never stops, here now, gone already." "Here's one of them!" "And another one!" "They fly away." "We offer you a journey which will allow you to escape time." "We found a way to slow down hours, days and years." "See this slow, regal and peaceful pace." "That's the sidereal time, specially perfected for you aboard our gondolas." "What is Man's biggest grief?" "Is it Death?" "No, it's not." "It's old age!" "Gods were immortal but what good would have immortality been to them if they didn't have eternal youth as well." "Never to grow old is our common dream... a dream that you'll be able to live at last when you travel with us!" "So, go, go and travel through time." "Here, time is ruining you." "Up there, it keeps you fit!" "Come on, get in our gondolas and say goodbye to old age." "Aren't you sick of the Earth, you buried ones?" "Don't you want to delay your death, o future corpses?" " We'll take you to the stars." " We'll take you out of time!" "Leave a world which leads nowhere." "A world which leads only to death." "Time is yours!" "And so are the stars!" "So, Françoise, your advice is for me to make the journey?" " You're asking me to go?" " Yes, you have to." " To leave you so soon?" " No." "To wait for me." " Yes, but... twenty five years." " I owe you those 25 years." "That's true." "I already thought about it, by the way." "Thanks for not telling me." "It was for me to have the nerve..." "and I had it." "All right, I'll go." "I'll go and find your tracks in the sky." "And I'll especially go in order to regain lost years." " But what about you?" " I'll wait for you." " Everyone in turn." " But when I'll be back?" " I'll be an old woman." " Oh, no, that's not what I meant." " No, old boy, I'm not OK." " What's your trouble?" " My cap." "It's too large." " It will get better." "What about your passengers?" "Where are they?" "Oh, miss Gaby!" "Oh, miss Gaby, I'm happy to see you." "One can't miss the opportunity of 25 years without getting any older." " And what does Antoine say?" " Antoine took it with a lot of grace." " Did he?" " He even paid for my journey." "Well, he gave me a ticket." "It didn't cost him a penny." "What about you?" " I'm the interstellar guide." " Which means?" "Which means I'm the only one who knows the area." "This way, madam, please, follow your guide." "Beg your pardon: do you know where the gondola is?" "I'm looking for it too." " Are you going?" " Yes." "So are you?" "Of course, why not?" "Oh nothing, but you're wearing a strange get-up." "What about my suit?" "It's OK for an ascension, isn't it?" "It is, but what about the net?" "Do you think you'll catch butterflies up there?" "Why not?" "What do you know about it?" "What about the gondola?" "No security service, no police?" "Doesn't the lack of police disgust you?" " Well, in a way, I must admit..." " I'm for order." "So are you, I suppose?" " Of course." "But I'm for going away." " That's why I decided to go." "Nothing is right here anymore." "Disorder reigns!" "Anarchy!" "The triumph of mediocrity." "And one might encounter evil doers on every street corner." "So I decided to split for the stars." "At least, it may be safer there." "I say "may"." "Look, by the way..." "Another jerk..." "Excuse me, do you know the gentleman you were talking to?" " I talk to whomever I please." " We'll see about that." " It's settled." "Mind my feet." " Police." "Oh, police, bravo." " Excuse me, madam." " I do excuse you, Sir." " Are you going aboard?" " The point is I'd like to go aboard." "Well, do me the favour of holding my dog for a moment, will you?" " Doesn't she bite?" " No, never." "She bites only bachelors." "Yes, it's a quirk of hers, if you can believe it." "Isn't she cute?" "It's her first cruise." "Up to now, she just traveled around the world." "If she's got memory, that's already a lot." "Excuse me, madam, are you waiting for a porter?" "No, I'm not waiting for anyone." "The matter of the suitcases is always a chore for a woman." "Will you allow me?" "Sorry..." "Miss?" "Thank you." " Are you going on the cruise?" " Yes, yes." " Are you alone?" " So are you?" " Yes." "How sad you look." " Life." " Sick of life?" " Aren't you?" " I?" "Oh, no!" "That's all I have left." " I'm going away to flee from life." "What a waste." "I'm going away to keep it." "Yes." "I fought in three wars already, so you understand." " I tried to kill myself." " Oh?" " I didn't have the nerve." " You shouldn't have." " Now, please, young man, are you in a hurry?" " Cabin 8." "Well, no, sir." "When you leave for such a journey," " you don't care about two minutes, you know." " Cabin 12." "Maybe so." "But their organization is ridiculous." "Especially since it's so expensive." "Oh... it doesn't change anything for me." "Of course, a man your age doesn't know what saving money is." "You're mistaken, dear sir, I live only for saving money, on the contrary." " Congratulations, young man." " Yes, an uncle's money." " A very old uncle." " Beg your pardon?" "I'm going up there in order to wait for my inheritance." " That's nice." " Yes, very nice." "I like my uncle but he's old and has money." " I'm young and I don't have any." "So..." " It's normal." "Absolutely normal." "But, on Earth, I was wishing for his death," " which disgusted me." " And up there?" "Well, up there, that's what the cruise is for." "I'm not wishing for my uncle's death anymore, merely waiting for it." " It's funny." " Foolish is what it is." " Are you both leaving?" " Yes." " Together?" " Yes." " Why?" " No reason." " What do you mean, no reason?" " To be together." "Is that forbidden?" "No, not at all, but I bet you're the only ones." "Hurry up, ladies and gentlemen, hurry up." " There." "They're gone." " Yes: it has begun." "Come on, Françoise." "Surely you're not going to..." "Of course not." "I'm not going to..." "You know, Antoine, I would have liked to go with him." " You know it was impossible." " Yes." " He had to go." " Yes, I know why." " To head the first journey." " Yes, of course." "That's the reason." " And you had to stay." " To prepare the next ones." "Of course." "I don't know anything about your heavenly things." " It's a beautiful station." " Yes, Antoine." "It's a very, very beautiful station." "Mind my little cellophane boxer shorts." "And mind my flowered pajamas." " I want two pillows." " But that is your parachute, sir." "Parachute?" "Can't they make pillows like everybody does?" "I want two pillows and I'll have two pillows." "No sun..." "No sun!" " Come in." " Ah, captain." "Glad to find you at last." "I must protest in the most categorical fashion." "I've been given a cabin facing North." "Yes, sir, you are right." "Look:" "we're soon going to adjust the balloon so you'll have sun in your cabin all day long." " Thank you." " And even all night long if it can please you." "Let's see, you'll be satisfied in..." "three or four months at the most." "I salute you, Sir." "But I've got a right..." "I paid for the journey." "I have a right to..." "Are there many like him on board?" "Just the right number." "A whole cargo." "In short: men and women." "Are you tired?" " What?" "Oh, no, not at all." " You're not sad, are you?" "No, of course not." "I'm going to tour the cargo." "Thank you." "So, what about the journey?" "Interested?" "Such a journey is very interesting, obviously." "You'll see when you're up there:" "it's out of a fairytale." " I meant, the earnings at the bar." " Oh, the bar, the bar..." "What about you, florist?" "Are you OK?" " Oh, what beautiful flowers!" " Come on, Mr. Lucien!" " Well, Lucien, how do you feel?" " OK, OK." " Are the passengers behaving well?" " Very well." " Settling down?" " Settling down." " Perfect." "Settling down slowly." "Slowly." "Oh, sir, for your buttonhole, what about a carnation or a rose?" " Oh, no, no, thank you." " A drink, then?" "Gladly." "It's even more beautiful than I thought." " Yes, we can't see anything." " We can't hear anything." " You are here." " You are here." "We are both here and there's only us." " And the stars." " Do you know them?" " Of course." " By name?" " Oh, no." "By sight." "Well, you understand, my dear chap, I left because of the appeal of danger." "Of adventure." "What about you, if I may be so bold?" " I came up here in order to wait for my uncle's inheritance." " Did you?" " An old uncle." " That's a good idea." " Let's drink his health." " Well, his health, you know..." " That was just a figure of speech." " What do you know!" " Oh, Uncle!" " My heir." " What a surprise." " My dear chap, I'm really sorry, but I wasn't too keen about dying." "You don't blame me, do you?" " No." " Of course, you blame me, and I can understand it." "Come and have a drink, you won't have lost everything." "The gentleman too, if you'll allow me." " Of course I do." " Let's go." "Please allow me to finish this one." "I'm all yours." " Oh!" "Oh, miss Gaby!" " Oh, Mr. Lucien, how are you?" " I'm very well." "You'll have a drink with us, won't you?" " Oh, no!" "Yes you will." "Yes you will." "His uncle is buying!" " What will you bring us, miss?" " I've got Sidereals." " All right, let's have those." " Four Sidereals then." " And a chair!" " Hello, everybody!" "No, no, don't bother getting up." "That was the lady with the dog." "She made an awful scene this morning because she saw herself all green in her bathroom mirror." " I know her." " Yes, you saw her at the theatre." " You don't say?" "It's her?" " Oh, so we have a star on board?" "A star!" "if it's true that protocol can be stretched during a cruise, may I hope that you'll do us the great honour of..." " My pleasure, sir." " Please." "But please know that I want to be a woman like any other here." "That is impossible." "To be like the others is the delicacy of glory." "And for the lady?" "You're going to make me a cup of very cold camomile tea, with a few lemon juice drops, a spoonful of powder sugar," " and you'll throw in it the tiniest branch of celery." " Tiny, tiny..." "But only after you put the lemon, do you hear?" "Certainly not before!" "And please, no introductions:" "I already know everything about all the passengers." " Are you a detective?" " There's one on board." " A detective?" " You don't say?" " Oh, swell!" " He's here." " Here?" "Where?" " Would you like to play billiards?" " Yes, come." " What about the other one?" " I'm not sure about the other one, but..." " I don't like this at all." " How do you know all this?" "Well, you know, you can learn a lot in a few hours..." "In that case, what could you tell me about..." "Some stuck-up girl, a pretentious person who says she wanted to kill herself..." "She's just trying to show off." "No talent, by the way." " Is she an actress?" " No, but she doesn't have any talent all the same." " This is amusing." " Will you allow me?" "So you're not feeling any better?" "You will eventually." "And, you know, you don't have to answer me." "If you like, I'll sit with you at the dinner table, so we won't have to talk to each other?" " If you allow me, it's my round." " No, please, it's for me." " I mean it's time to make my round." " Where are you going?" "To the heavens." "I'll have the honour to show you an extraordinary view." "You're going to see the interstellar space with all the explanations." "This way, please, ladies and gentlemen." " Damn, here they come." " Let's split." "Ladies and gentlemen, what you are now seeing is unique in the whole world, and destined to remain so." "First I want to draw your attention to these two chronometers." "The first one gives you the exact time on board: it's exactly 22 past 10." "Which means that we left Earth approximately five hours ago." "The second clock measures time as it passes on Earth." "Yes, ladies and gentlemen, our journey began about seven months ago." "Seven months..." " I missed." " Compliments." " You're good at it." " That's nothing." "You should have seen me in my prime." "I was champion of all the neighbourhoods." " A long time ago?" " Yes, that's old." " The statute of limitations applies." " Limitations?" "Yes." "You know what the statute of limitations is, don't you?" " 25 years." " 25 years on the Earth." " My jacket, please." " Here you are, Sir." "You're bugging me with your billiards." "You're too bad a player." "I hope, ladies and gentlemen, that our quick jaunt through sidereal spaces grabbed your attention." "I thank you for your good intent." "Should you need any further information, I'm at your disposal." "Ladies..." "Gentlemen..." "Ladies..." " So how's your business?" " Better and better." "They're beginning to get bored." " What about you and the sightseeing?" " It wasn't too bad at the beginning but, now, they couldn't care less." "They're not interested in interstellar spaces anymore." "They only think about drinking." " Miss!" " Sir?" " My milk." " Here you are, Sir." "My milk..." "My milk..." " May I?" " Please do." " Sorry." " You too." "I told you on the first evening that this journey would bore us to death." "At the beginning, during the first hours... well, the first months..." "Well, the first years." "I wasn't bored." "You're really improvident." "As for me, it's simple:" "each time I start something, I know I'll end up being bored." "So I am bored from the start." "That's what I call being provident." "Play spades." "Please don't, you always talk in my ear that way." " I play badly, granted, but I play alone." " All right,all right." "I mean she's really nice but when she talks in my ear, it tickles my hair and makes me sneeze." "Your playing is getting worse and worse, uncle." " Oh, please, you!" " Come on, come on." "A storm is coming." "It's the madwoman." " Lady, lady, this is madness!" " She'll kill herself." "Gymnastics are great for your health." "Who's coming with me?" "Don't push, now, don't push." "I'll make space for you." "This is going to curdle his milk." "Physical exercise is excellent, you know." "It makes your blood circulate." "Oh, poor old chap!" " Are you looking for the Earth?" " Yes." " I looked earlier." "Still there as ever." " We'll see about that." "Thankfully we've got television." " Oh, Mrs Monier, you asked me to warn you." " Yes, what is it?" " Three white hair." " At last!" " Some dye?" " Yes, that's it:" " white dye." "Put some more!" " White hair?" "Yes, yes, a little." "On the temples." "I'm waiting for someone." " Sidereal, please." " That will make three of them, miss." "One for me." "That will make seven." " At once." " So, how are you?" " The cocktails are great but how bored I am!" " Oh, yes?" "Your sky, your sky, it's always the same thing." " Well, it's the sky." " And what was that about gravity not working?" " Well..." " I was somewhat counting on that to have fun." "That was during our first trip." "Since then we found a thing, an electromagnetic compensator which fixes gravity." " Would you like me to cancel gravity?" " Oh, yes, Lucien." "Not one word to the Queen Mother." "Nor to the princess, her daughter." "Give me my milk, miss!" " I hope it's properly chilled." " Oh yes sir, it's properly chilled." "No admittance." "Danger of death." "Now where is the bloody gravity?" "That's not it." "Not that either." "What men must do to entertain women!" "Oh, I did it." "It'd been so long..." "I'm flying!" "I'm flying..." "Captain!" "Captain!" " Come and see, all of you!" "Come!" " What is it?" " Something wonderful, I assure you." " What is it?" "It's a wonderful thing." "Come, come, come." " Can you see that kind of ball there?" " Yes, so what?" " Well, it's the Earth." " Earth?" " Yes, yes, Earth." " Yes, the Earth." "You regret it, don't you?" "That tiny thing, there, alone..." "You like it in spite of everything, don't you?" " Well, we got used to it." " Yes, and you wanted to try and break your habits," " but you couldn't." " What right have you, Sir?" "What do you mean, what right?" "The right we all have here, all those who have eyes to see." "You all wanted to leave Earth..." "to escape someone..." "Did you succeed?" "You know very well that you didn't." "As soon are you're shown the Earth, looking like a poor little 100 francs pendant, you all have only one idea, only one wish: to go back there." "Do you want to go back?" "Yes or no?" "Let's see." "Before this, I touched another gizmo." "Not, not that one." "Oh, yes, this one!" "No, no... not this one." "There is something that nobody could escape, that none of you could flee from:" "that's him or herself." " Speak for yourself." " I speak for everyone." "Oh, what hardware!" "The first time, it was easy to know what was what." "Don't be afraid!" "Don't move!" "Follow my instructions!" "Oh, what a system!" "What a mess!" "I wouldn't be surprised if I did something wrong." "Oh, it's you..." "But..." "what did you do this time?" " Well, the thing is..." " Oh, no, please, shut up." " First I tried to..." " Hello?" "Hello, captain?" "Hello?" " It's fixed now." " Fixed!" "Oh, you think so, do you?" "Hello?" "All right, I re-connected the circuits." "Yes." "Did you take stock of the situation?" "What?" "Oh, damn..." "I'll be there directly." "The same thing happens during every journey, so..." " What's going on?" " This is outrageous." " When you can't, you don't!" " Bravo!" "For a quiet journey, it's a quiet journey, thank you." "I think you owe us..." "you owe me an explanation!" "Come on, come on..." "Oh, please, will you be silent!" "You know that, this evening, we began our journey back to Earth." "Well, we are going back." "But a slight incident just happened." " They always say that." " You want the truth?" "Yes, go on, it can be any worse than it is already." " Well, it was not an incident." " I bet it wasn't." "What was it?" "An accident." "A serious accident." "Your interior gravity regime was broken, the gyroscopes are not working properly, and we suddenly changed attraction fields" "This is unsufferable." "We're not asking for technical words," " we're asking to go back to Earth." " Yes, absolutely..." "I'm not asking for any praise or encouragement." "I'll gladly take the technical words back." "The truth is that our course was diverted and that we're now falling towards Venus." "insufferable, scandalous, outrageous" "Since we can foresee a rather swift landing, all of you are required to take their parachute as soon as possible." "What about you?" "Don't you run?" "What about your parachutes?" "Don't you have any?" "I made a raincoat with them." " Well?" " Their taking their parachutes." "Are they calm?" "My parachute!" "My parachute!" "Didn't you see my parachute?" "Oh, don't bug me with your parachute, Sir!" "Would anybody have a spare one, by any chance?" "Of course, we're short of one parachute." " Yes and, of course, I'm the victim again!" " You're unlucky." "They say everybody has them in turn, but I've only got trouble after trouble." " You're unlucky." " Do you want me to give you mine?" " Of course not, you're joking." "No." " Open!" "Open your parachutes!" "Come on, come on, a slight incident, just a slight incident will force the gondola to stay grounded for a few hours on planet Venus." "Passengers are allowed to go out during the stopover but are asked not to stray too far and to come back aboard at the first siren call." " It's not so bad here." " Do you think so?" "It's suffocating." " I'm not afraid of heat." " I can get used to it." " Of course, uncle, you have an iron constitution." " Iron can rust." "Well?" "Are you going away without your friends?" "No, I was just getting some fresh air." "Come." "Let's go and play billiards." " Oh, look!" " Those are the natives?" " There are women!" " And men too." " An audience, at last." " Come this way, come with me." " Can we join you?" " Make yourself at home." " How thirsty I am." " Please have a drink." " Oh, thank you." " They really are ravishing." "How good!" "How do you make it?" "We get it from the running fruits spring." " Where are you from?" " The Earth." "Are you surprised?" "Oh, not at all." "What surprises me is that you're the first ones." "We wondered if you would ever decide on it." " It wasn't so easy." " Why?" "What about you?" "Did you come to our place?" " We could have quite easily." " We're very happy here." " Why would we go to your Earth?" " Oh, so you're aware of..." "Of course." "We have telescopes." "And since we're somewhat indiscreet, we do watch you a lot." " Why?" " It's a bit hard to say." " To know what we shouldn't do." " So nice of you." "Here, Sir, nobody is ever offended." "Probably because we're happy." " How do you manage that?" " Very simple." "We stayed at what you call the golden age." "You knew it too, but you've been naughty since then." " You can say that again." " We decided to stay in that age." "There were no telescopes during the golden age." "We didn't halt progress." "We have doctors, scientists, laboratories, everything we need." "And lots of machines even more complicated than yours." " But we know how to use them." " What do you mean?" " As little as possible." " Oh, here you are!" "So you're having a walk while I'm swimming in dirty grease." " So what?" " That's is your job, isn't it?" "Well, yes, Lucien, more or less, I should say." " Are these the natives?" " Is the gongola repaired?" "Yes, yes, we can start again." "They're going to call you any time now." "The lady is the gentleman's?" "Compliments." " That's what they call the golden age." " What?" "What is the golden age?" "A life where you don't need any money." " I do like that country." " Yes but they don't have any theatre." " Lucky them." " They did make a nice life for themselves." "Compared to yours, of course." "They say that, on Earth, wealth is not equally divided between all the inhabitants?" "That is true." "Isn't it, Uncle?" "That people die before they're one hundred years old?" " Unfortunately." " And sometimes men kill other men?" " So they say, yes." " Yes, our world is ill-conceived, that's true." "My poor friends, how I understand that you wanted to leave." " What do you mean." " Sit down." "This is your home." "Tomorrow, we'll provide better lodgings." "And you'll tell us why you came down to us." "Down?" "Don't you know where you live?" "Down?" "Just try to realize: we didn't come down to you, we came up." "If you want." "Why did you leave your Earth?" "To flee from it, my dear Venusian." "To flee from it." "And each of us had good reasons for that." " You, for instance?" " I was fleeing from Death." " What about you?" " Ingratitude." "You can't imagine, young man, what ingratitude means to a woman!" " You?" " Old age." " And you?" " Penury." " You?" " Life." " And you?" " The madness of men." " You?" " Me?" "This interrogation is insufferable." "Just because you're stark naked!" "Excuse me." "Do not answer." "Oh, this is rich!" "Do not answer!" "Everybody's questioned, everybody answers, and I should not answer?" "Well, to you, Sir, and to you too, madam, I shall answer." "I shall answer, mind you, and you'll know it all, damn it, it has to come out." "If I undertook this journey, it was to get away, to leave Earth, to flee a ridiculous and badly set up world, full of closed roads, of ill-matched couples, of noisey upstairs lodgers, of fast cars that splash you when they pass, of collar buttons that rip shirts" "and of drafts ending in hearses." "That's why I wanted to leave Earth." "Earth where miserable people are really too miserable, the rich too rich and the sick too sick." "The weak too weak and the strong too strong." "Earth where the misery of some mixes with the selfishness of others and the meanness of them all." "Bah!" "What do you make me say?" " Stay with us." " Well, of course, it's nice here." "Why shouldn't we stay here?" "Why?" " Long live Venus!" " Long live Venus!" "Oh, here is the boss!" " Your friends decided to stay here." " Yes, yes, I know, I heard." "But it's not true." "They don't want to stay here at all." "Of course you won't stay." "Even if you wanted to, you wouldn't be able to." "Excuse them." "Excuse us but Earth is the strongest." "Earth is stronger than everything." "Where have they gone?" "Didn't they come back?" " I don't know." " Blow the sirens." "By the way, Lucien," "I sent you to tell our passengers that the repairs were done" " and we were about to go." " Beg your pardon, I forgot," "I was chatting with our friends." " It's the siren." " Oh, the departure, the departure!" "Excuse us, but this is the departure." "Yes, they're going." "Here we are:" "they've all gone." "They're gone." "Well, I salute you, dear lady." "Goodbye, Sir." "And thanks anyway." "Good morning, madam, Sir..." " And are you staying?" " No, I won't either." " Why?" " I have two good reasons for that." " The first one?" " The first one is that I never said I wanted to flee from Earth." " And the other one?" " A woman is waiting for me." " We understand." " Of course you do." " It does excuse everything." " Even Earth." "Thank you for the Earth." "All aboard!" "Nonstop to the Earth!" " Everybody's here, Lucien?" " Yes, Sir, everybody's here." " No, two of them are still missing." " Who?" " The love birds." " Oh, yes, I know." "Well, we can go." "Have a nice trip." "And now they must be going down." "Do you remember the day when they left, Antoine?" " What?" " Do you remember the day when they left?" "Do I remember it?" "More than thirty years ago!" "It created terrible financial problems." " The year 2000 came." " Yes, very slowly." " Too slowly." "I waited so much." " For what?" "The year 2000?" "Do you think they'll have changed?" "Of couse not, Antoine, they won't." "But we did change." "Oh, you do think I've changed, do you?" " You're doing very well." " And you are naughty!" "Naughty, naughty!" "To think that they'll be here in a few hours!" "But you know, Antoine, now neither he nor I will go away again." "You can count on it!" "Let me through, for God's sake, let me through!" "Who's that bloke?" "That bloke is the inventor of the cruises." "Let me through, ladies." "Without me, you wouldn't be here." "This is the first gondola coming back down..." " Let me through, I'm the captain's wife." " You're the captain's wife?" "No, but I could have been, should Lucien have been a little more serious..." " Oh, you are Lucien's wife." " Yes." " How is he?" " Who?" "Well, Lucien." "Well, I hope he won't come back sick." "But the insurances will pay, won't they?" "What?" "I'm asking if the insurances will pay, should Lucien come back sick." " Oh, yes, insurances." "How's the family?" " The family?" "The family's lost in the crowd." " The young generation doesn't know how to manage." " Oh, while in our time..." " And the security service is..." " ... it's a setback..." "So, how are you." "Did the cruise go well?" "Yes, that's it, it went well." "One word, boss." "We'll have to talk about my contract again." " What?" " My contract." " Oh, the contract, yes." " It won't do." "You're paying me for three weeks instead ot thirty-five years." "Well, you only traveled during three weeks." "No, thirty-five years." "Oh, this is not going to start again, is it?" "I never understood those matters of weeks and years anyway." "I understand one thing:" "I won't go back for the same fee." "Oh, and there was that little..." "Gaby?" "I would like seeing her again." "What a view!" "It's really as ugly as it was before." "And still the same disorder, of course." "One should even think that they invented new ruckus-making machines." "The human mind really has endless resources when it comes to bugging people." " Miss, take me to the management." " What department?" "Department of complaints." "Mr Pépin, do you understand?" "Let's go." " No." "No hard feelings?" " No hope." "As always." " Police." "You're under arrest." " You don't say?" "Remember that little matter on the Boulevard Voltaire?" "It's too late." "The statute of limitations applies." "No, my good lad, it won't before a few days more." "You missed your trick." "What about our ten years delay on Venus?" " That's true." " Saved by Venus." "Please, leave me, madam, I'm looking for my wife." "Fifty-six years of waiting and faithfulness to hear that!" " Lucien!" " What?" "It's you, Georgette?" " Of course." " Oh, yes, it is you." "It really is you." "Well, neither of us did change." " So will you finally kiss me?" " Of course I'll kiss you." " I really wonder why I wouldn't kiss you." " So do I." "No, really, I wonder why!" " Of course you pricked me!" " Yes, but I was so busy on Venus." " How's the kid?" " Daddy!" "Grandfather!" "Where are my flowers?" "What?" "No more flowers?" "All right!" "You're going to see how we used to go out in the days of flowers..." " You didn't change, you know." " You changed even less." "What about down here?" "Did it change much?" " A little." "You'll see." " Oh, no, no, I certainly won't." "You're not going away again?" " Yes, I'm going away again." " Oh, no!" "Robert!" "I'm going away with you." "We're both leaving for the country." "You know, where there are real trees, real wheatfields." " Real creeks, real ricks of straw?" " Yes." "And manure." "And piglets." " Cows and rabbits and ducks." " Cabbage soup." " Plants." "Roads." "And a fire at night." " All that is true, all that is good." "All that doesn't change." " the Earth." " Good old Earth." "Translation:" "Goupil66 May 2011"