"[Mouse squeaks]" "[Penguins wenk]" "[All cheering]" "[Screeches]" "♪ Adventure Time ♪" "♪ Come on, grab your friends ♪" "♪ We'll go to very distant lands ♪" "♪ With Jake the Dog and Finn the Human ♪" "♪ The fun will never end ♪" "♪ It's Adventure Time ♪ Ripped By mstoll" "Yup!" "Yeah, totally stuck that landing!" "Yeah!" "Whoo!" "Whoo!" "Whoo!" "Man, it's been so long since I've worn the Jake suit." "I forgot how awesome your bod is, bro." "Stretchy-arm power!" "[Creak!" "]" "I feel unstoppable!" "[Roars]" "Ba-a-a-a-m!" "And I don't even feel it!" "[Groans]" "[Grunts] Beemo, throw your plate at me." "Okay." "Hyah!" "Yeah, Beemo, show me the stuff!" "Keep it coming!" "Hyah!" "Yeah, Beemo, unleash the beast!" "Yeah!" "Unleash the beast!" "[Groans]" "Come on, Beemo, bring it!" "That's nothing!" "[Growling]" "You're weak, Beemo!" "Rrrrrrrraah!" "Ooh." "Ooh." "Aah!" "Aah!" "[Panting]" "[Sighs]" "You okay, Beemo?" "I am no match for the Jake suit." "That's right." "Dog, the Jake suit is mad strong." "This junk can protect me from anything." "JAKE: [muffled] Uh, sort of." "Wait, bro, what are you doing up here?" "You know I'm not, like, actual armor, right?" "FINN:" "Septuple flip off the tree house!" "JAKE:" "No-o-o-o-o!" " FINN:" "Whoo-hoo!" " JAKE: [grunts]" "Ride 'em, cowboy!" "Whoo!" "[Gags, coughs]" "[Panting] Ohh..." "Bam!" "Huh... huh... huh... [sighs]" "You were a little rough with the Jake suit today, bro." "You mashed up my doggy bag pretty hard." "Why didn't you stop me?" "When you're in my body, it pushes out my brain, so I have no control." "Come on, bro, taking pain is easy." "You just have to imagine that every bruise is a hickey from the universe." "And everyone wants to get with the universe." "I bet you wouldn't be saying that nonsense if I wore you as a suit." "I bet I would be saying that nonsense." "Okay, bro, let's see how you like it." "I'll bring the pain." "Do it, bro." "Get in here." "[Grunts]" "[Chuckles] Yes!" "Time to bring the pain!" "[Straining]" "Huh?" "[Chuckles] Man, are you kidding?" "[Grunts]" "You give up?" "You have to, like, punch me in the face." "Hmm." "I thought I was." "This is hard." "I-I can't even make a fist." "How do you control my body so well?" "Dude, I'm graceful." "Mom raised me graceful." "[Grunts]" "[Chuckles] Dude, what the Bjork?" "[Growls]" "Hmm." "Aha!" "Here we go." "Dream Journal of a Boring Man, Volume 12." "Uh, Jake, what are you doing?" "There's all kinds of pain, Finn." "Jake, come on." "Don't do this." "[Sighing] Ahh." "Okay, let's see." "Ooh, this one looks good." "And it's not too long..." "only seven pages." "[Chuckles] Okay, here we go." "[Clears throat]" ""In my dream, I was eating jasmine rice, but it was also brown rice, and it was also my mother."" "Ohh." "[Snoring] Huh?" "What... where am I?" "Oh, yeah." "Hey, Finn!" "How long have I been out?" "I don't know." "A couple hours." "Say what?" "Why are you still reading?" "It's actually not that bad." "There's a bunch where he knows he's dreaming." "Here..." "let me read you a little." ""So, I said to the first guy, 'if everyone in my dream is me, then you are me,' and he said, 'I am who?" "'" "And I said, 'Me.'" "And he said, 'Who is me?" "' And I said, 'You.'" "And he said, 'What about you?" "'" "And I said, 'No, you."' - [Sighs]" ""It's like he's trying to solve a mystery that doesn't exist."" "You want me to keep going?" "No, I'm hungry." "Yeah, I'm hungry, too." "How about a truce while you go make us some lunch?" "Oh, I didn't know we were allowed to call truces." "I'll totally remember that the next time my doggy bag is hurtling towards a fence post." "You know, you could use the opportunity of cooking me food to mess with me." "[Gasps] Wait a sec." "You just gave me an idea!" " Yeah?" " [Laughing evilly]" "Uh-oh." "Oh, look out." "You gonna make me something gross?" "[Laughing continues]" "Something spicy?" "You know I can take it." "[Laughing continues]" "Ta-da!" "Meatloaf?" "That's my favorite dish." "Mm-hmm." "[Chuckling] What did you do to it?" "I assure you, it's delicious." "Okay, well, you're really terrible at this." "[Chomp!" "]" "Yummy." "Oh, that's just mean." "Admit you're wrong, and you can have some of this delicious meatloaf." "No, I'm good." "[Chomping]" "[Slurp!" "]" "Mmm-hmm-hmm!" "COMPUTER VOICE:" "Special occasion." "Special occasion." "Special occasion." "Jake, that's my special occasion phone." "Someone's calling me to tell me about a special occasion." "So?" "So, can you walk me over there?" "I want to see who it is." "Hmph." "Special occasion." "Special occasion." "Oh, it's Flame Princess." "[Chuckles] I'll talk to her later." "I don't want you embarrassing me, or, uh, anything." "Jake?" "Jake, seriously, don't do this." " Tell me I win, dude." " No, absolutely not." "All right." "Say goodbye to Flame Princess thinking you're cool." "I'm gonna embarrass the Bjork out of you." "Oh, hey, you came!" "I got worried 'cause you didn't answer special occasion phone." " My relatives are waiting inside." " What?" "Well, that's why I called on special occasion phone." "All my less-evil family members are here for dinner." "Come eat." "[Laughing evilly]" "Finn, this is my family." "These are my two younger brothers, my brother who's home from the military, and my judgmental aunt and uncle." "[Jake laughing]" "Jake, whatever you're about to do, please don't do it." "[All gasp]" "[All gasp]" "♪ I'm a tough tootin' baby that can dance like a man ♪" "♪ I can shake-ah my fanny ♪" "♪ I can shake-ah my can ♪" "♪ I'm a tough tootin' baby that can punch-ah your buns ♪" "♪ Punch-ah your buns ♪" "♪ I can punch all your buns ♪" "♪ If you're an evil witch, I will punch you for fun ♪" "What are you doing in front of my family?" "!" "Hold on, bro." "Perhaps it's a custom unknown to us." "Nope!" "Just doing the kind of stuff I do all the time." "This is a nightmare come true for me, sister." "♪ Tough tootin' baby ♪" "♪ Tough tootin' baby ♪" "What are you doing?" "!" "Don't you want to see more?" "Oh, my Bjork!" "No, I don't want to see more!" "Wait, what's that in your mouth?" "Jake?" " Oops." "Busted." "Are you controlling Finn?" "Yeah, I'm causing Finn pain." "We have a bet going on." "And you made him dance like a baby, semi-nude, in front of my family?" "Wow, that's pretty hard-core." "[Chuckles] What?" "[Chuckling] Good luck, Finn." "Hope you win." " I will." " Hmph!" "[Gasps]" "Hi, Lady." "Finn!" "[Speaking Korean]" " I'm right here." " Oh." "'Sup?" "What's TV doing here?" "I thought all the kids found apartments." "[Speaking Korean]" "[Chuckles] That's my boy... mama's basement baby." "[Sighs]" "[Speaking Korean]" "Oh, it's this bet we're doing." "It's not really a bet." "It's more like a showdown." "I'm trying to get him to admit that it's hard when someone wears you as a suit." "How do I win the bet, Lady?" "TV:" "Hey, Dad?" "Why don't you try jumping in a volcano?" "[Keyboard clacking]" "Hmm." "[Laughing evilly]" "Yes!" "So, what are we doing, bro?" "The universe is gonna have a full-on make-out session with you, bro..." "I'm talking minimum tier eight." "Behold!" "[Wolves snarling]" "Fire wolves?" "That's your plan?" "Please." "Oh, no, bro." "That's just fortuitous circumstance." "Allow me to take advantage." "Here, pup-pups." "You want some kibble?" "You want steak flavor?" " Steaky-steaks?" " Aw, my kibble!" "[Wolves snarling]" "[Snarling stops]" "[Wolves whimpering]" "[Sizzle!" "]" "[Chomp!" "Chomp!" "Chomp!" "Chomp!" "]" "How you like it, bro?" "Pretty painful, huh?" "Eh, whatevs." "Ah, forget it." "Let's go." "[Wolves whimpering]" "Hmm." "Looks hot." "Oh, yeah, bro." "The pain train has arrived at the station." "Choo!" "Choo!" "I'm ready, bro!" "Bring it!" "You're nothing, lava!" "You're a bum!" "I can handle you!" "Look, just say, "stop," and you won't get burned." "Never!" "Okay, bro." "This'll pretty much wreck up your whole life, so think about it." "Bring it!" "Yeah, baby, feels good!" "Love it!" "Loving that heat on my skull!" "Okay, I'm gonna lower you some more." "It's probably gonna cook up your brain." "Oh, yeah, give it to me!" "Dang, Finn is flipping crazy." "This isn't going to do anything." "He's never gonna give up." "[Growls]" "Aah!" "[Gags, coughs]" "[Grunts]" "[Panting]" "What happened?" "You robbed me of the win!" "You're right, man... my bruises are hickeys from the universe, and I should just accept that." "Yeah, boy!" "In your face!" "Yeah, in my face." "[Groans]" "[Laughs]" "Yeah!" " Dang it, Finn." " [Chuckles]" "[Vocalizing "Entrance of the Gladiators"]" "Who's ready for rehabilitation?" "We'll start with full-body immersion therapy." "[Smooching]" " No!" " Yes!" "♪ Come along with me ♪" "♪ And the butterflies and bees ♪" "♪ We can wander through the forest ♪" "♪ And do so as we please ♪" "♪ Come along with me ♪" "♪ To a cliff under a tree ♪" "FINN:" "This party is so crazy!" "Ripped By mstoll"