"Buddy, this is the lot and this is the house." "Are you sure he'll sell it?" "Buddy, for me, he'll do anything." "I'll knock this down." "I'm going to build a 10-story office building here." "Before you make any plans, what about a finder's fee, say, 200 liras?" "No problem." "Thanks, buddy." "I'll go talk to him." "Wait here." "It's a lot safer." "What do you mean, safer?" "The owner sometimes gets these moods." "He's a nervous type." "Last week I brought a client." "He almost strangled him." "But don't worry." "It'll be okay." "Tell him I'll pay anything for this house." "Hi Hannuka!" "How are you!" "Come in!" "Drop it!" "Act crazy!" "Where is he?" "!" "I'll kill him!" "Get out of here!" "I'm not selling my house!" "Calm down!" "Calm down!" "It's only Hannuka!" "Get out of here!" "Put the chair down and go inside." "Calm down!" "Let me out!" "Where's my knife?" "Forget the knife!" "Where is my knife?" "!" "Leave me alone!" "Let me at him!" "No!" "Let me at him!" "Put the ax down!" "I don't know what I'll do to him!" "Take your medicine!" "You take it every morning!" "Filmor presents:" ""Snooker"" "Yehuda Barkan" "Yoseph Shiloah" "Zev Revah" "Arieh Elias" "Nitza Shaul" "Tuvia Tzafrir" "Yaakov Banai" "Talia Shapira" "Your coffee." "Tea, please." "Later please." "What about our order?" "Here you go, sweetie." "Hello!" "Where's my beer?" "In a minute, pal." "Hold on." "Gavri, take this beer." "Hey, what babes right on the morning." "Take the order, Halfon." "Thank you." "Put it on my tab." "There's no room left in the book." "Listen." "What?" "One day I'll pay it all back, as soon as I retire." "You've been retired 20 years." "Wow, I have?" "Sorry!" "Sorry!" "Don't tell me you're having one of your mornings!" "Tell me what you're doing?" "What did I do wrong?" "Clean it up already!" "Come on!" "And don't drive me crazy so early in the morning." "Come here, you idiot." "Open your eyes!" "Sorry!" "I didn't see!" "I didn't notice!" "You didn't notice?" "You almost wrecked my car!" "Do you know how much it costs to fix an original lemon?" "How much?" "Just the dent is 100 liras." "You know what?" "I'll give you 100 liras and that'll be that, okay?" "Fine, give me the money and be careful next time." "Come on, Hurry up!" "Hey, what's that noise coming from your motor?" "What noise?" "Turn it off." "Why?" "Open the hood." "Turn the engine on." "Okay." "Give it gas!" "I've got my foot on the pedal." "What do I do now?" "Stop a second." "Did you find something wrong?" "What's wrong?" "What is it?" "Your car choked." "Choked?" "Yeah, you gave it too much gas." "The radiator fell into the carburetor and made a big mess." "Really?" "It can't be helped, pal." "Leave the car in the sun for an hour and the radiator will float back up." "Are you sure that if I leave it in the sun an hour, the radiator will float back up again?" "Hey, of course it will." "Wow!" "I thought it was serious." "No, don't worry." "What's your name?" "Moshon." "How do you do." "Hannuka." "Thanks a lot, Mr. Hannuka." "Don't worry about it." "You can sit here and have a cup of coffee." "You can also have a game." "A game?" "A game of what?" "Ping pong, yo-yo, snooker..." "Do you play snooker?" "Do I play snooker?" "Why?" "I'm a snooker champ!" "Really?" "Why don't we play a game?" "No way, buddy." "I don't play with champs." "No way." "But there is someone..." "Do you see that guy?" "Yes." "He's the biggest sucker around." "I took a thousand off him this morning." "Do you want me to introduce you to him?" "Just pretend you're a sucker." "Don't worry." "I'll be fine." "Come on!" "Play!" "Play!" "How can I play." "He keeps bothering me." "How can I play?" "Get your hands off me." "What's your problem?" "Stop it, Halfon." "Wow!" "What a shot!" "You should go to night school." "Get off of me!" "You too!" "Come on, Halfon." "So, did you beat him?" "Be healthy, and may God send you here twice a week." "You tricked me!" "You tricked me!" "Moshon!" "Hello, Uncle." "My baby!" "You haven't changed a bit." "You look thinner in photos." "Moshon, this is Geraldine." "Give your aunt a kiss." "Wait a minute, wait a minute!" "Glad to meet you." "This is my late sister's son." "Hello sir." "Hold on." "It's nice of you to come to the airport to meet us." "What?" "Nice airport." "Yes." "Is it new?" "Very nice." "What do you do?" "Your work?" "Your profession?" "Answer your aunt!" "I didn't understand." "She asked your profession?" "What profession?" "Your job." "Job?" "I don't have a job." "Never answer me like that!" "You know, he's a student." "He goes to university." "Electronics, all that bullshit." "You know." "Yes." "Did you rent a car, like I wrote to you?" "Of course." "Where is it?" "In the parking lot." "Let's go." "Good job." "It's just the kind of car Uncle Salvador likes." "Good job." "Do you like it, honey?" "I've seen better." "Yes?" "Tell him to hurry up with the baggage." "Okay, take my coat and sit in the car." "No, Moshon!" "No!" "No one touches this bag except for Uncle Salvador." "Hurry up!" "I'll be in a minute, love." "I'll be in a minute." "Auntie is beautiful, Uncle." "Moshon!" "Come here." "Didn't you get a new tooth?" "You went to see the bride without a tooth?" "I didn't see the bride." "I was never at her house." "Are you saying I came all the way from America for your wedding and you never met the bride?" "How can l, when I'm missing a tooth?" "I sent you money." "Wasn't it enough for a tooth?" "The money is gone." "Where is it?" "Where is it?" "I lost it at snooker." "Where did you lose it?" "At snooker." "They fooled me." "Since when do you play snooker?" "God!" "Would you hurry up." "Love, I'm coming in a minute, believe me." "I'm so sorry, Uncle." "I didn't mean to do it." "Stop!" "Don't worry!" "Don't cry!" "I didn't mean to." "The guys that tricked you have no clue who they started with." "I'll marry you off, and we'll have a wedding, like I promised your mother." "Are we going to get out of here or are we staying?" "I'm thirsty and tired and I want to go to the hotel." "Yes, darling, I come." "Fuck you." "Is this the rabbi's house?" "Don't be sad, Moshon." "Smile." "Rabbi, a gift from America." "No thank you, sir." ""He who hates gifts will live."" "Of course." "It's a tiny Torah, a modest gift from America." "Thank you, sir." "Excuse me, Mr..." "Salvador." "Salvador." "What do you do?" "I deal in sacred matters." "Sacred?" "Yes." "You work for the burial society?" "Work?" "I organize and run it for the Greater United States." "What a great deed!" "A great deed indeed!" "Marrying off a bride is even greater, Rabbi." "Now everything will fall right into place." "We'll have a wedding." "You're going so fast." "Such a happy..." "Let's meet the boy first." "We'll see what he knows." "Everything." "Does he keep the commandments?" "Of course." "He knows everything." "Does he wear phylacteries?" "Of course he does." "Would he keep them in the closet?" "Does he pray morning, noon, and night?" "He prays nonstop." "You can't stop him." "Does he keep the Sabbath?" "Devoutly, of course." "Does he drive on the Sabbath?" "How can he?" "He has no car." "Very good." "Come next week with your nephew and we'll check him out." "We'll talk and I'll test him." "There's nothing to test, Rabbi." "Let's set a date already, and we'll have the best party the country has ever seen." "We'll fill the hall with a band and dancers." "Believe me, Rabbi." "No, don't pressure me." "Check the produce before you buy." "What's this, miss?" "I didn't order this?" "This?" "No." "What did you order, sir?" "Strawberries." "What's this?" "Did you do it again?" "What's going on here?" "What did you do again?" "What's going on?" "Sorry!" "Sorry!" "Sorry, sir." "She's new at the job." "Really." "She just finished a waitress course." "She's in training." "Sorry, sir." "Sorry!" "Go to hell!" "Come tomorrow!" "She won't be here." "He forgot his checkbook." "Excuse me a minute..." "Go take care of those two at the end." "That's it." "Pay up!" "How about another game?" "No way." "I'm finished for today." "That's enough." "What do you mean, finished?" "I'm not some sucker!" "I have to go." "I can't." "What do you want from me?" "I lost 3,000 liras here!" "You'll play until I tell you." "I don't care if you lost." "I'm tired." "What do you want?" "Hold it!" "What's all the shouting?" "Come on!" "What's the matter?" "I lost money and he won't keep playing." "He can't force me to play." "We played five games." "I'll play you again tomorrow." "I have to play all the time." "Are you nuts?" "!" "Don't tell me..." "Forget that germ." "He's a nobody." "He's a thief." "His whole family is a bunch of thieves." "Come, I'll find you someone honest, clean." "We have a real sucker here." "Hello!" "You!" "Yeah, you!" "Are you playing now?" "I put down 3,000 liras." "Forget it." "Are you free?" "No problems." "Do you want to play." "Okay, depends how much." "One thousand." "Forget it." "I don't bend over for that." "Fine, then 2,000, okay?" "How much?" "5,000." "Let's say six." "How much?" "Ten." "I heard ten." "Fine, ten." "Ten thousand?" "Ten thousand." "What's the matter?" "Dollars?" "What's that in Hebrew?" "With the devaluation, it comes to 60,000 liras." "Okay." "Okay?" "Good." "What's the matter?" "Stick?" "Me?" "Okay." "Did you bring sandwiches?" "May I?" "We're screwed." "Please." "Did we say 10,000?" "How much was that?" "I think it was double, right?" "I heard 60,000." "Sixty?" "Sixty thousand?" "I don't remember." "I was setting up the balls." "Did you forget something?" "Are you looking for the checkbook?" "Please." "Thank you." "You sign too." "Our checks never bounce." "Goodbye, eh?" "What kind of sucker is that?" "Don't worry." "There's nothing wrong with losing to Salvador." "Years ago, he was Israel's Snooker King." "Why didn't you say so?" "You didn't ask." "They say he runs the Mafia now." "Mafia?" "What luck!" "It's a good thing you gave him the money." "Otherwise, he'd finish you off." "Gavri, we have to steal that check back." "Tell us where he lives." "I don't know." "Aren't you ashamed?" "I'm ashamed, but my throat's dry." "Pretend you're a tourist." "Hello." "The Salvador family." "Room 93." "Are they in?" "Yes, they're in their room." "He's in his room." "The hotel is full of cops." "Let's get out of here." "Calm down." "Calm down." "Hello." "Hello." "Do you speak English?" "A little." "Why?" "Hello." "Hello, Mr. Salvador?" "Yes, who is speaking?" "You don't know me, but I know you." "I saw you yesterday in the pool." "I love men like you." "Are you ready, honey?" "Who's that?" "The Rabbi." "God, that will take hours." "I'll wait downstairs in the bar." "Bye bye." "Ciao." "Yes, sorry to keep you." "Come down, please." "But how can I recognize you?" "I'm wearing a green sweater, I'm tall and I'm blonde." "So, come." "No, I can't." "So, please come down." "Okay, bye bye." "Holy shit!" "What a job." "Thank you!" "Thanks a lot." "Thanks very much." "Goodbye." "Bye." "Now go, wait till he leaves to search his room for the check." "Why me?" "You go." "Why?" "You got me into this mess." "Fine, where will you be?" "I'll be in the bar." "Wait for me." "Go on!" "Honey, is that you, dear?" "Yes." "I'm leaving in a minute." "Holy shit!" "All these cops!" "Honey, could you bring me my dress, please." "It's on the chair." "Excuse me..." "Hi." "I looked for you in the lobby." "Lobby?" "Yes." "Yes." "Then come to my room for a drink." "Why not?" "Please." "Why not?" "After you to my room." "I saw you at the pool." "You're very beautiful." "You're beautiful too." "Yes?" "Yes." "What would you like to drink?" "Never mind." "Never..." "What's your name?" "My name?" "Yes." "Delida." "Nice." "And yours?" "Salvador." "Cheers!" "Cheers!" "I'll be back in a minute." "Horny bastard." "I'm here." "Let's have a seat." "A seat?" "Yes, a seat." "Please, don't... huh?" "Are you okay?" "I'm okay." "Yes?" "Yes." "Don't you feel hot?" "Hot?" "Very hot." "Yes?" "Yes, very hot." "Let's make a bath." "A bath?" "What?" "Douche?" "Douche?" "Yes," "You douche." "Beautiful." "Give me a kiss." "What kiss?" "You douche!" "Douche!" "After." "Yes." "Kiss many many." "Yes." "No, no, after, after." "Don't exaggerate!" "I'll take the check and get out of here." "Darling, I love you." "I'll be back in a minute." "What a party, yeah, yeah." "What a party, yeah, yeah." "Party with your mother, you asshole." "Wow!" "Here's the check." "Honey." "I'm here, honey." "I love you." "Yes." "Nice music." "Kiss me." "No, no." "I want to dance, please." "You dance beautifully, like Marlon Brando." "Don't push, please." "No, no, no." "Sally?" "Yes." "Meet my cousin Delida." "She came to visit us." "How you do." "How do you do." "Delida..." "Very nice cousin." "I'll be back." "What are you doing?" "It's a man!" "A man!" "Hello, police?" "I'd like to report that in a few minutes" "Bank Discount, 4 Mapu St. will be robbed." "One of the crooks is bald with a mustache." "The other is shorter, with glasses and a gold tooth." "Try and get there before the bank opens." "Hey, come here!" "Hands up!" "Don't move!" "I didn't do anything!" "What do you want from me?" "Don't say anything!" "They're totally finished!" "I'm very sorry..." "Salvador." "I really suspected that the telephone tip that you were about to rob the bank was a fake." "Officer, thank you anyway." "The police must be vigilant these days." "There, you see?" "We were just doing our job." "I found two more suspects hiding in the yard." "Suspects?" "We were just standing there." "Quiet!" "What are you doing here?" "Officer, these are old friends of mine." "I asked them to wait outside." "And we waited outside." "Did you hear what happened?" "What happened?" "The check I got isn't covered." "Really?" "No, but don't worry." "Give us the names of the cheats that signed it." "We'll take care of them." "Thank you officer, but that won't be necessary." "They definitely cover the check in a few days." "A few days?" "Tomorrow!" "At the latest." "If they have to be arrested, what's the punishment?" "They'll spend a few years in jail." "Greater sucker you found!" "What can I do?" "We have to get him the money." "Of course we do, but how?" "Hold on, Gavri!" "What about the house?" "Sell the house." "Are you kidding?" "How could he sell the house?" "It's not just his." "It's his brother's too." "You have a brother?" "Since when do you have a brother?" "When?" "A long time?" "So what's the problem?" "Speak to him, Gavri!" "He'll sell it if he hears you're going to jail." "Yeah?" "He'll have a party if he hears about it." "Why would he have a party?" "Why?" "He thinks I keep bad company." "I ruined the family's name." "Gavri, you have to make up." "You have to sell that house." "Why are you laughing?" "You're pissing me off." "It isn't easy to sell the house." "Gavri's father wrote in his will, that they can only sell the house when Gavri's brother Azriel gets married." "So what's the problem?" "Let's marry him off." "Him get married?" "He'll never get married." "Don't worry, Gavri." "I'll find him a girl" "If I have to dig her up." "Where were you?" "How many times must I tell you:" "No roaming around at work." "My bike had a flat tire." "What can I do?" "You have a flat head." "This is a store, not a spa." "Good morning." "Hello." "What can I do for you?" "Do you have fresh cauliflower?" "I do." "How are you, Azriel?" "Fine. -4.30, please." "Put it on my bill." "Okay." "Good bye." "Bye." "Azriel!" "Azriel!" "Where's the vegetable store?" "Turn right into the market." "The middle store is the vegetable store." "your brother's name?" "Azriel." "Azriel." "Fine." "Give me the stuff:" "the hat, the book." "Now give me the glasses." "It'll be okay." "Don't worry." "Where are those glasses?" "Shit!" "Each lens is a microscope!" "Good morning." "Hello." "How can I help you?" "No need to help me." "I came to help you, sir." "Help me?" "Who are you?" "Rabbi Hannuka Halevy." "Never heard of you." "I'm a matchmaker." "I came to set you up with a delightful woman." "Set up?" "Woman?" "Don't you want a wife, sir?" "Sure I do, but take my old wife first." "Are you married, sir?" "Do me a favor and get out." "Let me work in peace." "I'm in no mood for your crap." "Excuse me, you're not him?" "Which him?" "Azriel?" "God forbid!" "That's all I need, to be that moron." "He works for me?" "Get it?" "Where is he?" "I'd like to know where he is." "Get out of here!" "Get out!" "How many times must I tell you not to touch my bike?" "!" "Get out before I show you." "I don't know what I'll do to you!" "Who's afraid of you, you punk?" "!" "Believe me sir." "I know him." "It's a waste of time." "No girl would want to marry him." "Besides," "He's in love." "In love?" "With who?" "The Rabbi's daughter." "You should see how he ogles her." "Excuse me sir, does the Rabbi's daughter love him?" "How could she?" "Who could love that moron?" "Please!" "I sent him with a delivery half an hour ago." "He should be back already." "Instead, I have to deliver it." "Excuse me, could I wait here?" "No, no, no!" "Get out!" "Go!" "You can't trust anyone these days." "Can I sit down?" "No!" "Read Psalms?" "Read Psalms at home." "Please can't I wait here?" "Just don't touch anything." "Fuck you, asshole!" "What?" "Instead of working, you're smoking?" "!" "What's your problem?" "!" "Get your hands off me!" "What's wrong with you?" "!" "How dare you touch me?" "!" "What's wrong with you?" "Get out of here!" "Move it!" "I told you to get out of my sight!" "Go away!" "Go away!" "Go away!" "Hey!" "I told you not to touch my bike!" "Do you want me to beat you up?" "Do you?" "Do you want to get hit?" "Come on." "Put the stick down!" "Put the stick down, I said." "Put it down!" "You hooligan!" "Where are you hiding?" "He hit me!" "I was like a mother to him." "Stop." "I feed him and he beat me up." "He hit me!" "Excuse me, does he always hit people?" "I knew he was nuts but I never saw him go crazy." "Listen, press down on the swelling." "Press it." "No, no, no!" "What?" "He's crazy!" "He changed his clothes again!" "Excuse me." "Is that him?" "Of course it is." "Mr. Azriel, why must you get so angry?" "Why?" "We're all friends." "He started with me." "He took the air out of my tires." "I did not." "He threw a cauliflower at me." "Cauliflower?" "Liar!" "Why are you calling him a liar?" "Why?" "He's not a liar?" "He's a God-fearing boy." "Don't be so angry, Mr. Azriel." "Don't be so angry." "He's lucky I didn't strangle him." "You see!" "I told you!" "He's gone crazy!" "What crazy?" "Really!" "He just needs to rest!" "Really!" "Why don't you give him a day off." "A day off?" "Is it the Sabbath?" "What kind of day of off?" "Who cares." "Take a day off." "Take a walk." "Take some tangerines, on the house." "Take a walk." "Fine." "See you tomorrow, okay?" "About the bruise, get ice and put pressure on it tonight." "Mr. Azriel!" "How are you?" "Thank God." "Don't you remember me?" "I remember you, sir, and your family too:" "your father, rest in peace, and your brother, may he be healthy." "Brother?" "I have no brother." "Your brother!" "I remember you both from the neighborhood." "What a cute pair!" "Azriel and Gavriel!" "I have no brother!" "Do you hear me?" "!" "A brother like that isn't a brother." "I don't want to hear his name again." "Do you hear me?" "Fine, don't get angry." "You already got angry today." "Who are you?" "I'm Rabbi Hannuka Halevy," "The most famous matchmaker in Jerusalem." "I came especially for you." "For me?" "Yes, to find you a wife." "A wife?" "Yes." "Thank you but I don't want a wife." "I actually heard you're in love with someone." "Who?" "The Rabbi's daughter, such a delicate, pious creature." "Don't be embarrassed." "Every boy comes of age." "Besides, falling in love with the Rabbi's daughter is..." "Yes, but do you think she'd agree to marry me." "Why not." "You're not crippled or deaf, God forbid." "Why not?" "You're actually..." "Yes, but what about her?" "Don't you worry, okay?" "I'm the most famous matchmaker in Jerusalem." "There's not a kettle I didn't put a lid on." "Do you think the Rabbi would agree to it?" "What Rabbi?" "Her father." "What do you mean, agree?" "I spoke to him myself." "When I told him, he insisted you come today." "Calm down." "Today?" "Believe me." "He wanted to see you this afternoon." "Are you serious?" "Yes." "What time?" "Wait for me at 4:00 by the Rabbi's house, and don't forget to dress nicely." "Don't worry." "I'll wear the best clothes I have." "... forever and ever." "Amen." "Hello, Rabbi!" "Hello." "Who are you?" "Rabbi Hannuka Halevy, a matchmaker from Jerusalem." "I came about your daughter." "You're too late, sir." "We already found a groom." "Sorry." "What do you mean?" "You don't even know what a wonderful husband I have for her." "Are you sure you said that you'd meet here?" "Where else?" "The pool hall?" "I told you he's an idiot." "Of course he's an idiot." "You're his brother." "Welcome." "Hello, Rabbi." "Why are you standing outside?" "This must be the groom." "Yes, yes." "Welcome!" "Please come in!" "I'm not from here." "What do you mean, not from here." "He's very shy, modest, devout, innocent." "Innocent? "Happy are the innocent." Come in, please." "An original saint." "What do you do, sir?" "Me?" "I was a..." "I have a..." "What do you mean, what does he do." "He... studies the Torah, as it is written:" ""You shall study it a thousand and one nights."" "Nights." "Good." "What about the day?" "He has to make a living." "As it says: "Without flour, there can be no Torah."" "What flour, Rabbi." "He doesn't work in a bakery." "He deals with... guavas, apricots, vegetables, fruits..." "Fruit is good." "Israel is praised for its fruits, as it says: "A land flowing..." Carry on, sir." ""A land of..." Carry on, sir." ""A land of..." Carry on, sir." ""Milk and honey."" "The refreshments are here." "My wife Carmela." "May she live to be 120." "Thank you very much." "Feel better." "Thank you." "These are my friends," "Hannuka the matchmaker, from Jerusalem and this is the boy, Azriel." "How do you do?" "And this is my daughter, Yona." "Yona, go to your room." "Please eat." "These delicious meat patties were made by my daughter." "Hey, pass the bread." "Pass the bread." "Wow, they're delicious!" "Did you forget to make a blessing?" "Who should I bless?" "The food God gave us." "I already blessed it." "He forgot the blessing." "Did you forget the blessing, Rabbi Hannuka?" "Amen." "Amen." "You see, Rabbi." "Each "Amen" he says is like sugar." "A saint!" "Talking about saints, maybe you can tell me who the ten saints were, who were promised in their lives to enter Paradise?" "In their lives?" "They just walked in, free of charge?" "They were promised in their live." "He knows." "Tell me who the ten saints are." "Your groom has quite an appetite." "What can I say, Rabbi?" "With all his studying he forgot to eat." "He sees meat and wants it." "Azriel, what's wrong?" "Don't you feel well?" "What's wrong, Rabbi Hannuka?" "Rabbi, he's very pale." "I don't know what's wrong again." "Maybe we should open a window so he can get some air." "No, we don't need a hurricane." "It's the love and the food." "His stomach is acting up." "Maybe he should go outside for some fresh air." "Maybe he should." "Maybe." "Feel better." "What is it?" "What's wrong?" "Cough!" "The idiot is here." "Get out of here quickly, before your brother sees you." "Get in there!" "Hurry!" "Give me the hat!" "The hat!" "Azriel, where were you." "I sat here waiting." "What kind of hat is that?" "Look!" "I bought you a new hat." "Fix yourself up." "The Rabbi is waiting." "He's eager to see you." "Fix your jacket." "Get your hands out of your pockets." "Azriel, I told the Rabbi great things about you." "Just answer him loudly." "He can't hear very well." "Oh, you're back." "Bless you." "Bless God." "Please sit down." "Make yourselves comfortable." "Azriel, sit in your seat." "Please sit down." "How do you feel?" "Fine, thank you." "How do you feel, Rabbi." "Thank God." "Thank God." "He got some air and he's just like new." "Bless God the Healer." "Now that he feels well, maybe he can answer a question." "What question?" "What question?" "What do you mean, what question?" "Which ten saints were promised they would enter Paradise?" "In their lives?" "Hanoch, Eliezer, Batiah, Zerah, Elijah, the Messiah, Hiram, and Yehoshua Ben Levi." "Very nice." "Would you perhaps like something to drink?" "Something for your throat." "You strained it..." "Fine, if you have some milk." "What?" "Milk." "Milk!" "How dare you!" "Just a minute ago he ate meat, and now he wants milk?" "!" "Meat patties?" "God forbid!" "I haven't had meat all week." "What?" "I saw him eat meat just a minute ago!" "I may not hear well, but thank God, my eyes are fine!" "Rabbi Hannuka, forgive me, but it's scandalous not to eat kosher in my house!" "Calm down, sir!" "How can l?" "This infuriates me!" "He doesn't eat kosher, and he lies too!" "What did I do?" ""What did I do?" he asks!" "I don't want him in my house!" "Get him out of here!" "But you see he doesn't feel well" "What did I do?" "He still asks what he did!" "Rabbi Hannuka, please!" "I don't feel well." "Please take him." "I don't want to see him." ""Between love and rebellion, salvation is far from sinners."" "But what did I do?" "What did I do?" "I know you didn't do anything." "What did I do?" "Did you see me eat meat?" "No, I didn't." "What can I do?" "So why is he mad at me?" "Why is he mad at me?" "He's upset because his daughter is getting married." "Don't you get it?" "I see." "So now he probably doesn't want me to marry her." "Who said?" "Don't worry." "It will work out fine." "I want to apologize." "No, not now!" "Don't..." "Not now!" "Don't you see?" "But what did I do?" "I'll speak to him." "He'll calm down in a day or two." "Wait for me at the store." "I'll speak to him, okay?" "I'll let you know you can see him again." "Do you promise." "I promise." "Yes." "What did I do?" "What did I get myself into?" "The minute I got here, I told you to keep studying." "Study it day and night!" "But I study all the time, Uncle." "By heart, Moshon?" "Of course, Uncle." "What did Jacob say to Esau?" "When?" "When they met." "They met?" "Of course they met!" "Where?" "The soccer stadium." "The soccer stadium?" "Don't play games with me!" "I'll crush you, Moshon!" "Tell me where they met and what they talked about!" "They talked... about things." "Is this how you want to marry the Rabbi's daughter?" "Where's everything you learned at school, you idiot?" "I study from morning to night, Uncle!" "I'm sick of it!" "Do you want the Rabbi's daughter or the beadle's?" "The Rabbi's daughter." "Then memorize the Torah." "Come, stand here!" "See what you look like, you dumb ass!" "Look at you!" "Get on a bike." "Exercise." "Maybe you'll lose 10 grams by tonight." "Why won't you listen to me, Gavri?" "Why?" "Leave me alone!" "I told you to leave me alone." "Nothing will come out of my brother." "Enough." "Do you want Salvador to put us in jail?" "We have to marry your brother to the Rabbi's daughter." "The Rabbi's daughter?" "After what happened?" "She won't even look at him." "At him no, but at you, yes." "Forget it." "I'm not getting stuck there anymore." "Fine, not you." "Your brother." "You're driving me crazy." "Trust Hannuka, okay?" "Look what you did to me!" "." "See what I look like!" "You look great." "You look exactly like your brother, like two peas in a pod." "Fine." "What can I say to the Rabbi's daughter." "Speak nicely." "Tell her nice stories, nice things." ""I seek at night for my heart's delight."" ""I seek at night?" Where can I take her?" "A disco?" "Do I have to teach you that." "Take her where you take all your dates." "The harbor?" "What's wrong with that?" "It's romantic." "There are birds, boats, sardines, everything." "Hey, here she comes." "Fine." "Give me the hat." "Good luck, lover boy." "I'll be fine, boyfriend." "Yona, I want to talk to you." "Yona!" "Azriel?" "Yona, I have to talk to you." "Do you understand?" "Not here." "My father might still see us." "But I have to speak to you urgently." "Let's talk in the vegetable store." "No, not the vegetable store." "It's closed today." "He's sick." "Then maybe we should go somewhere else?" "Why don't we go to the sea?" "Beautiful, isn't it?" "Lovely." "Have you been here before?" "Lots of times, but never alone with a boy." "And you?" "Me too." "It's the first time I'm here alone with a girl." "Do you smoke?" "What?" "You smoke, Azriel?" "Me?" "No." "I just asked if you smoke." "Are you crazy?" "It's forbidden." "It's poison." "You get cancer from it." "It's very pretty here, isn't it?" "Beautiful." ""I love you." "I love you." "I love you."" "Yona, can I tell you something?" "Yes." "Look, Yona, I don't know how to say this." "I..." "I... " -l need you."" "I need you, Yona." "What?" "I love you." "How can I tell you?" "I love you so much that I can't live without you." "What can I say?" "Why didn't you tell me earlier?" "I was embarrassed." "What can I do?" "I thought the Messiah would come before you said that." "Do you really love me?" "I'm crazy about you." ""A sound of joy, a sound of glee..."" "Can we go already?" ""The sound of a bride to be."" "So, Yona, if you love me, and I love you, what are we waiting for?" "What do you mean?" "I mean maybe we should get married." "Married?" "Believe me, Yona, I'd be a great husband." "We'll live like lovebirds," "I'll wash and iron for you." "I'll take out the trash." "I'll wash the floor twice a day." "I'll..." "Well, what do you say?" "I don't know." "I have to think about it." "Fine." "While you're thinking, I'll go and pay." "Yossi, come on." "I saw a great game." "Shall we go." "Please." "Mr. Azriel, I have news for you." "Call your sister Azriel." "Where is she?" "She went with your brother." "Where did they go?" "To that street there." "Where are the clothes?" "In the car." "Want an apple?" "No, thank you." "Why not?" "Take it." "No, maybe later." "Azriel?" "Yes." "I decided." "Decided what?" "I don't need you to cook or do laundry or take out the garbage." "I don't understand." "I can do that all by myself." "I'll be a great wife to you." "What?" "Do you agree to marry me?" "Why?" "Do you regret asking me already." "Of course not." "I thought because of what happened with your father." "I'll speak to him." "Don't worry." "He better not wreck it for us." "Give me the apple." "What apple?" "The one you wanted to give me." "I wanted to give you an apple?" "Why are you so confused today?" "Are you sick?" "Of course I'm sick." "I asked you a question." "and you won't answer me." "But I answered you." "Well, can't you say it again." "Fine, I want to be your wife." "Please!" "You can't come out now." "Hannuka." "You can't come out now." "No way." "It's forbidden." "Don't you understand?" "You can't go out there." "The Rabbi mustn't see you two together, Come on!" "Please!" "Please, Azriel!" "Hold on." "I don' get it." "I'm begging you!" "I just said hello to her." "Now she's gone." "Well, I have to go home now." "Then I'll come with you and we'll talk to your father." "No, I should talk to him alone first." "No, believe me, it's better if I come with you." "No, you don't know my father." "Give me some time." "I'll convince him." "Time is precious!" "Believe me, I love you!" "And I love you, Azriel." "Yes, but..." "Don't worry." "I'll convince him." "Bye." "Bye." "So long." "Please tell me what the Israelites ate in the desert for forty years." "They ate... kosher." "Kosher?" "Very true." "Your nephew is consistent." "Rabbi, it runs in the family." "But what did they eat in the desert for 40 years?" "What?" "What?" "Water." "Oh!" "Hamentaschen (pastries eaten on Purim)!" "Hamentaschen?" "Well." "I'm late for prayers." "Rabbi, I'd like to ask..." "No, not now." "I'm in a hurry." "My congregation is waiting." "Moshe, stand up when your bride comes in." "Rabbi, please give us a date for the wedding." "All in good time." "No, right now!" "I'm in a hurry." "Why don't you come tomorrow evening with your wife and nephew." "We'll talk then." "Moshon, say hello to the bride." "Hello." "Moshon, I'm happy to tell you we're invited to the Rabbi's house for an engagement meal." "No engagement." "We'll just talk about..." "It's the same thing." "It was very nice to see you, Moshe." "Carmela, get the door for them, please." "Yona, why are you sad, sweetheart?" "It's the way of the world." "When a girl comes of age, she has to get married." "It's not that, Daddy." "Then what is it?" "I don't love him." "Who?" "That Moshon." "How do you know that?" "You don't even know him." "I don't know." "I just don't like him." "Yona, you didn't like any of the husbands we brought you." "That's not true." "I liked one." "Yes?" "Who?" "Azriel." "Azriel?" "That crazy heretic?" "No..." "Daddy, you don't understand." "It will never happen." "I don't want to hear his name." "There's no way..." "Hello, Rabbi." "You're back to cast an evil eye on me with his big eyes?" "What evil eye, Rabbi?" "I just came to ask for another chance." "It's over." "One more chance." "It's finished." "My daughter will never marry a heretic." "It says: "Thou shalt not cook a lamb in its mother's milk."" "He didn't cook, Rabbi!" "He didn't." "What can I say?" "He loves your daughter so much, he lost his head." "Love?" "It's over." "My daughter has a groom." "Everything has been signed." "But really, Rabbi." "What groom can compete with this saint?" "Saint Azriel?" "I've seen saints like him." "My daughter's fiance is a real saint, virtuous, honest, and from a good family." "Rabbi, do you know what a good family Azriel is from?" "What kind of good family could he possibly have?" "What can I say." "They're all saints." "They don't smoke or drink." "They don't play snooker." "It's a righteous family." "Righteous is good, but I really must rush to the synagogue for prayers." "My congregation is waiting." "Please, Rabbi." "Just a minute." "Yes?" "What?" "I'd really like to come to dinner tomorrow with the whole family." "I'm in a real hurry." "At your house." "I'll think about it." "Tomorrow evening." "Let me think about it." "Answer me, Rabbi." "Fine, let me think about it." "Tomorrow evening." "Fine, tomorrow evening." "Tomorrow evening, fine." "Our Father in Heaven..." "Tomorrow evening." "Gavri, you have a phone call." "Who is she?" "It's a him." "Hello." "Hello, pal, this is Salvador." "Who?" "Salvador." "Ho, how are you?" "Remember the little check?" "It'll be fine, buddy." "Don't worry." "In... in... maybe tomorrow you'll get it." "Let me say that if I don't get the money tonight, pal, in cash, I'll hand it over for treatment... tonight." "Give me another..." "Hello?" ""You shall see sons..."" "Someone's at the door." "What?" "Someone's at the door." "The guests have arrived." "Come help me in the kitchen." "There's lots to do." "Good evening, Rabbi." "Happy Holiday!" "A joyous holiday!" "Mr." "Hannuka." "Please God, may we see the Messiah." "May I bring in the relatives?" "What relatives?" "The groom's relatives." "They're waiting outside." "What groom, Rabbi Hannuka?" "There's been a terrible error." "You should come tomorrow." "Tomorrow?" "Of course." "I sent Yona to tell Azriel." "Yona?" "The Rabbi knows that Azriel studies so much, he gets confused and doesn't know what he's saying." "I'm so sorry, Rabbi Hannuka." "Sorry?" "But the guests came from far away, and they're very tired from their journey." "This is very unpleasant." "Very unpleasant, Rabbi." "But Rabbi Hannuka, I invited other guests this evening." "We'll crowd in, Rabbi." "Forgive me, Rabbi Hannuka, please don't talk about the wedding to the guests." "God forbid!" "It'll stay between us." "Now, please meet Uncle Yaakov Halfon." "He raised Azriel as a child and taught him Torah and good deeds." "Where are you going?" "Come here!" "Rabbi." "Pleased to meet you, Mr. Halfon.." "What do you do, sir?" "He's an expert." "An expert on what?" "Everything, especially alcohol." "I can sniff a glass and tell you what bottle it's from." "You work in a winery." "A winery, vineyard, wherever." "Go on!" "Move it!" "Please meet Ricky." "Rika." "Pleased to meet you." "What is she to Azriel?" "A cousin." "She's from a good family, a heart of gold." "Cousin?" "A cousin." "What do you do." "Waitress at the pool hall." "What?" "Waitress." "A waitress?" "Rabbi, she means in her spare time she works as a waitress at the soup kitchen for the poor." "An act of mercy!" "Wonderful!" "What does that mean, heart of gold?" "You screwed up, now move!" "Very pretty!" "Very pretty!" "Last but not least, a true saint, the groom, Gavri!" "Gavri?" "Azri!" "The groom Azri!" "His nickname is Gavri." "The groom, Azriel, please!" "Hello, sir." "Hello." "I brought you a gift." "Thank you." "A good family." "Very good!" "Welcome everyone!" "Please come to the table." "Carmela, we have more guests." "Welcome!" "I hope there's enough for everyone." "Don't worry!" "We don't eat much." "Besides, I can help in the kitchen." "I can help." "A fine girl!" "Miss Rika, on your way to the kitchen, take this with you, please." "A fine girl." "Let's drink to the family." "Bravo, Moshon." "Bravo." "Come, darling." "Come on, pal, come." "The flowers, Uncle." "Good." "Come." "You memorized everything, didn't you?" "Rabbi!" "Welcome!" "Good evening, Rabbi!" "Excuse us for being late." "Thank you." "Please meet my wife, Geraldine, who just arrived from the US." "It's a pleasure." "Moshon, of course." "How do you do." "I'm so sorry, Mr. Salvador." "Something unexpected happened." "What is it?" "Is the bride ill?" "God forbid." "Some unexpected guests dropped by." "They're relatives." "Thank goodness." "I had to accept them." "I hope that doesn't bother you." "On the contrary, Rabbi." "The more the merrier." "We'll get to know them." "Thank you, but please, Mr. Salvador, they don't know anything about the match." "Please don't mention it to them." "Very wise." "I promise to keep it secret." "Thank you." "Come in, please." "Please, Geraldine." "Come in!" "Come in!" "Rabbi, this is the happiest day in my life." "I've waited 20 years for this day." "Everyone, welcome to my home..." "Come in!" "Why are you waiting outside?" "Come in!" "These are old friends." "Please have a seat." "Please sit down." "Please sit down." "Let me introduce you." "Rabbi Hannuka." "Mr. Salvador." "Mrs. Salvador." "Mr. Halfon." "Azriel..." "Moshon." "Moshon." "Please everyone." ""A psalm of David, As I sat on gentle waters..."" "Blessed art Thou, Lord our God, Who brought forth bread." "Amen." "It's not enough to bless God for the food." "We should bless Him for making matches too." "Let the groom stand up and we'll bless him." "Stand up!" "He wants to bless you." "Sit down!" "Why are you standing?" "I said the groom should stand." "I'm the groom." "You wish!" "What's so funny?" "Who'd marry you, you jerk?" "I'm Yona's groom!" "You're the groom?" "Of course he is." "Who else?" "You?" "Of course not!" "Azriel's the groom." "Rabbi, what's going on?" "Who are these people?" "I thought they were your relatives." "Mr. Salvador, calm down." "The food arrived." "Get up!" "Make an impression on the bride." "Stand up!" "Oh my goodness!" "Don't worry!" "It's nothing." "Miss Rika, Please wipe it down well." "Moshon, keep eating!" "Sit down, shut up, and eat!" "It's nothing, Mr. Salvador." "We have more fish." "Carmela, bring more fish from the fridge, please." "Miss Rika, the other side too." "Really, Miss Rika." "Can't you be careful?" "What can I do?" "It was an accident." "Yona, bring the sponge, please." "Nothing happened." "Good God!" "What gall!" "It's a scandal!" "What will I do now?" "See what I look like!" "Calm down, Mr. Salvador." "It wasn't malicious." "Now we'll see if your nephew's knowledge has improved." "Ask what you please." "Let's see." "Tell me, where did Moses receive the Ten Commandments?" "Stand up when he's talking to you." "Stand up!" "Sorry, what was the question?" "Where did Moses receive the Ten Commandments?" "Where did he receive..." "The Ten Commandments." "Who?" "Moses?" "Moses!" "Moses!" "I can't hear you." "What?" "A mountain!" "Mount Tabor." "He's totally ignorant." "God protects the fools." "An ignorant fool." "Azriel the Torah scholar!" "Torah!" "I thought we came to agree on the wedding." "Hold on!" "I thought the Rabbi hadn't decided yet." "With two such grooms, it's a difficult decision indeed." "That's right." "Mr. Halfon is right, Mr. Salvador." "Don't pressure me." "It's a difficult decision." "Let's drink a toast to the Rabbi." "Cheers, Mr. Halfon!" "Cheers!" ""Who ever expected it?"" "Rabbi!" "Rabbi!" ""God bless Israel!"" "Rabbi, I beg you!" "Rabbi, we came to conclude the wedding plans." "Please be serious." """ "Nothing greater than Torah."" "Rabbi, you must listen to me." ""Who ever expected it?" "Go bless Israel!"" "Do you want this back?" "What will it cost?" "Free." "Forfeit the bride." "I'll forfeit the debt." "Let's play for it." "For the whole debt?" "The debt and the bride." "What?" "The debt and the bride." "Fine." "When?" "Tomorrow at four." "And if you don't show." "Whoever doesn't show loses." "Rabbi!" "Yes, Azri?" "May I speak with you?" "Pour your heart out." "It's about..." "My daughter." "You know I..." "Love Yona." "Very much." ""Water will not wash away love."" ""And rivers cannot sweep it away."" "I thought about it quite a bit, and after speaking to my wife, we decided you should marry Yona." "What?" "You agree, Rabbi?" "Yes, we'll have the wedding two weeks from today." "You can tell your family." "Thank God." "And bless Him." "Thank God." "Gavri!" "Gavri!" "Where are you going?" "Why are you taking it apart?" "There are two minutes left." "He might still show up." "I'll call him." "You can call till tomorrow." "We already won." "He definitely won't show up, Uncle." "Hello." "Am I disturbing?" "Do you know my brother?" "His name is Gavri." "Be careful, Uncle." "He dressed up to trick us." "Heads or tails?" "Who me?" "Heads or tails?" "Tails." "I break." "Excuse me, do you know if my brother will be here today?" "Leave it!" "Not right now!" "Answer me!" "I asked if my brother is coming today." "It's very important to me." "Did you know that I'm getting married in 2 weeks?" "We'll see whose getting married." "Your turn." "Play!" "Should I hit the white one?" "Just play the game!" "He's on his way." "Okay, move." "Move." "Congratulations." "You won the check and the bride." "Moshon!" "The bride?" "You won the game and the bride." "Come, Moshon." "Azriel, you..." "What's happened, Uncle?" "Come on." "Come outside." "We'll get some air, Uncle." "Azriel, believe me, you don't get it." "We did it all for you." "Really!" "You won the bride." "Azriel!" "Azriel!" "Listen, Azriel!" "Leave me!" "I don't want to listen to you." "Azriel, believe me!" "We did it all for you!" "The game was for you." "I courted Yona for two weeks for you." "She was convinced I was you." "Believe me, Azriel, I did it so Yona would be yours." "Then Yona loves you, not me." "Azriel!" "Stand straight!" "I have no patience, Mom." "I have to fix the train." "I want you to be a pretty bride tonight." "I wish it was night already." "I want it to be over already." "I just hope your groom shows up on time." "We haven't seen him in days." "Don't worry." "He'll be there." "He's shy." "He must be so excited." "Excited." "Scallions for 3 liras." "Hello!" "How can I help you." "Excuse me." "Where's Azriel?" "Don't I know you?" "No, you're mistaken." "Where's Azriel?" "I don't know." "What do you mean, you don't know." "He's been missing for two weeks." "Two weeks?" "!" "Oh shit!" "Are you sure I don't know you?" "We were in the same class in school." "School?" "So he's not there?" "Drive!" "Azriel!" "Azriel!" "He is missing." "What will we do?" "The wedding is in three hours!" "We'll do it!" "If we don't find him, you'll go instead." "As who?" "The groom." "Welcome!" "Where were you?" "We were very worried." "The bride is waiting." "Go in!" "Hurry!" "Run!" "She's worried." "Please, everyone!" "Are we starting?" "Right away." ""Bless art Thou, God." ""Bless Him and His name." ""Who sanctified Israel with the rites of marriage."" "Sip the wine, please." "Give some to the bride." "Congratulations!" "Rabbi, my heartfelt congratulations to you." "I'd be so happy if you'd marry my nephew Moshon." "He's over there, with the woman he loves." "Moshon, say hello to the Rabbi." "Hello." "Riky, say hello to the Rabbi." "Hello" "Remember me?" "I'm your cousin." "Did you drop out of heaven?" "Cheers, honey bunch." "Sally!" "Congratulations, Rabbi." "Thank you." "Welcome." "I know you." "Are you with the groom's family?" "No, with the matchmaker." "Rabbi Hannuka?" "Yes, we're cousins." "Where is he?" "Why didn't he come?" "He has angina." "His tonsils swelled up." "I'm so sorry." "Please tell him I hope he gets well soon." "Thank you, Rabbi." "I'll tell him that soon." "He also asked me to remind you, as you know, he worked hard for this match." "He asked for his fee." "Which is?" "200 smackers." "What?" "Liras." "200 liras." "He deserves it." "He worked very hard." "Please tell him I hope he gets well soon." "Goodbye, Rabbi." "Goodbye." "Thank you." "Rabbi!" "I forgot to tell you." "Rabbi Hannuka asked me to give his fee to the young couple as a gift." "Thank you." "Thank you." "Congratulations to them." "I hope he gets well soon." "He will, Rabbi." "He'll get well." "Don't worry." "Gabriel!" "Come here!" "Yona, meet my brother, Gavriel." "Your brother?" "How do you do?" "How come I never met you?" "We never did." "He lives overseas." "He came especially..." "for our wedding" "You did?" "Yes." "I took a special flight." "I came to congratulate you." "I have to go right back." "Why?" "The party hasn't started yet." "It's over for me." "Great suit!" "Goodbye." "Goodbye." ""Tonight, tonight, tonight, what a happy night!" ""Tonight, tonight, tonight, what a happy night!" ""Tonight, tonight, tonight, what a happy night!" ""We're having a party tonight." "We'll eat and drink tonight." ""We'll dance and sing tonight." ""We're having a party tonight." "We'll eat and drink tonight." ""We'll dance and sing tonight." ""Everybody clap your hands, and it will be twice as grand!" ""Everybody clap your hands, and it will be twice as grand!" ""Everybody clap your hands, and pass the drinks around!" ""Everybody clap your hands, and pass the drinks around!" ""What a happy night!" ""Tonight, tonight, tonight, what a happy night!" ""Tonight, tonight, tonight, what a happy night!" "The End"