"[ thunder crashes ] [laughsevilly] [ sawing ]" "[ electricity crackles ] it'salive!" "[ thunder crashes ] [laughsevilly] [ smooch!" "] [ laughs evilly ] [ whimsical music plays ] offtoneverland!" "comeon,nana!" "[ bell jingles ] [barking] [ strained barking ]" "[ barking stops ]" "[ children laughing ] yay!" "now,fantasticfools,you  shall feel the wrath of doom!" "sheesh,doom,whythe heck are you so grouchy all the time?" "yes!" "Thefinishingtouch." "Now the world will tremble when" "They look upon dr." "Doom!" "dr." "Doom,wait." "The mask is not -- [ sizzling ] aah!" "Sweet lord in heaven!" "oh,wait." "The mask is upside down." "holdstill,doctor." "a-a-a-a-aah!" "okay,oncemorewithfeeling." "yousonsof --  [ sizzling ] aah!" "letusnotdelay." "yes,thecodpieceremains." "whatdidyou--didyousay "codpiece"?" "Aah!" "Clock out, guys!" "oh,thecodpieceisupside down." "whatdidyou-- aah!" "sorryaboutyourdick,dude ." "you'regoingto prison," "Sinestro." "all:" "No!" "welovehim!" "sorry,greenfool." "Your ring won't affect anything yellow, so i adopted a bunch of" "Asian kids." ""a,"that'sincredibly" "Racist, and, "b," that's not how my ring works." "iknow,iknow,butthemore i thought about it, the more i" "Fell in love with the idea." "I adore these little scamps." "all:" "Weloveyou , mr." "Sinestro!" "ohh,lookat 'em!" "hi." "I'm a centaur -- half man, half horse." "please,doyourparttohelp keep my people alive." "[bleep] a horse." "♪sexy♪ [ techno music plays ] [ horse whinnies ]" "♪ sexy ♪ ♪ horses are sexy ♪" "♪ you should [bleep] a horse ♪ ♪ horses are sexy ♪" "♪ you should [bleep] a horse right now ♪" "♪ horses are sexy ♪ ♪ you should [bleep] a horse ♪" "♪ horses are sexy ♪ ♪ you should [bleep] a horse" "Right now ♪ ♪ sexy ♪ [ horse whinnies ] beargryllshere." "Today, i'm gonna show you how to survive in a truly exotic" "Environment." "Behind me are matt dillon," "Neve campbell, and denise richards from the movie" ""wild things." [ dramatic music plays ]" "What you want to do is distract matt dillon by talking about how" "Good he was in "drugstore cowboy."" "Then you finger bang the girls under the water while the jets" "Hide it all." "whoareyou?" "youknow,youwerejust  incredible in" ""drugstore cowboy." oh.[ chuckles] oh,mygosh,thisisthebest hot tub ever." "ooh,i 'mreallybranchingout  from tv!" "andremember,abirdinthe hand is worth a hand in two" "Bushes." "[ both moaning ] dr." "Stoneto houstoninthe blind." "Is anyone there?" "Please?" "Please, you're my only hope." "hey,it'stimefor dickwax and the fridge... ♪inthemorning♪ [ boing!" "]" "hello?" "Can you hear me?" "hey,hottits." "You're on with dick wax and" "The fridge." "listen,i 'manastronaut" "Stranded in space." "A-actually, i'm more of a" "Medical doctor than an astronaut who, some would say, had no" "Business up here in the first place." "uh-oh,soundslikesomeone's a little cuckoo for cocoa puffs!" "i'dlethersuckonmy  cocoa puffs." "oh,thefridge,you son ofa  bitch!" "listen!" "My name is dr." "Ryan stone." "I need to reach nasa." "[britishaccent]well ,my" "Name is margaret thatcher, and i need some balls in my mouth." "shutthe[bleep]up, you  morons!" "easythere,dr ." "Bone." "[ boing!" "]" "We'll connect you with nasa if you can name the famous singer" "Who had a nip slip yesterday." "idon'tknow." "I've been in space this whole week." "unh,unh,unh!" "No nip slip, no nasa." "fine." "Was it..." "Beyoncé?" "itwasbeyoncé!" "You know your nip slips!" "We'll connect you with nasa now." "[ telephone rings ] nasaheadquarters." "Houston." "oh,thankgod." "This is dr." "Rya-- boom!" "You just got fridged!" "[ toilet flushes ] oh[ bleep]it." "[ alarms blaring ] [ tires squeal ] youaredead,asshole!" "oh,yeah?" "aah,likeagoodneighbor," "State farm is there!" "withstatefarm's-- peace!" "wh-what?" "[grunts] you messed with the wrong guy!" "aah!" "we'llbeholdinganelection" "To determine papa smurf's second in command, and since i'm the" "Smartest, i know you'll be choosing me." "[ punch lands ] [ whistle!" "]" "[ grunts, groans ] [ southern accent ] this is" "Nothing short of betrayal." "These blue buffoons have no idea" "With whom they're trifling." "Hell, they don't even realize" "I've landed on my head so many times, i've lost my moral" "Compass and now speak with a southern accent." "[ dramatic music plays ]" "Now to smurf the pawns on the smurfing board." "brainysmurf?" "[normalvoice]isimplyhad" "To express my admiration to you, gargamel." "Even though your villainous plots threaten my people, i've" "Always appreciated their cunning." "wow." "I-i didn't realize how much i [sniffles] needed to hear that." "ionlywishtherewassomeone" "That could help you succeed by giving you the location of" "Smurf village." "[ southern accent ] and now in" "Three, two, one." "wait!" "You could tell me." "smurfmate." "[ normal voice ] my dear, it appears i've seduced you." "And now i want a favor." "gee,i don'tknowifi should" "Help you, brainy." "Ohh!" "Oh, my." "Oh, smurf it." "Smurf it right...." "There." "[ inhales deeply ]" "Oh, it's so good." "[southernaccent]well ," "What did you expect?" "This is not netflix." "[ normal voice ] looks like someone had a secret past life," "Handy smurf." "i- -it'snotmyfault!" "My name is literally slang for "hand job."" "It took me years before i figured out the whole handyman" "Angle." "aslongas youbuildthe" "Invention we discussed, no one will be the wiser." "oh,god." "[ sobbing ] thevotesarein, and  papa smurf's new second in" "Command is...[gasps] hefty smurf!" "[ cheers and applause ] oh,he'sjustsohot." "atlast!" "I killed a geriatric, four-inch" "Gnome!" ""least likely to succeed," my" "Ass, class of '53, huh?" "[ cannon cocks ]" "Are you double-crossing -- [ machine-gun fire ]" "Aah!" "uh,b-b-brainydidit!" "He saved us." "I demand we redo the vote." "[ cheers and applause ] andso,afterarunoffvote," "I am honored to announce that papa smurf's second in command" "Is..." "Hefty?" "!" "youjustcan'targuewith how hot he is." "[southernaccent] impossible!" "I played the game perfectly." "I -- actually, you know what?" "He is pretty hot." "asa neanderthal,my brainis" "Way bigger than all you homo erectus." "okay,oog." "Don't have to keep bragging how" "Great you are." "ithinkido." "Yo, ug, durg, play them rocks." "[ xylophone music plays ] [ rapping ] ♪ unh ♪ ♪ ah ♪" "♪ my name is oog ♪ ♪ spell it out ♪" "♪ o-o-g, that's original original gangsta, see?" "♪" "♪ i'm next on the evolutionary tree ♪" "♪ your brain's the size of a chimpanzee ♪ [chuckles] ♪myhuntingskills" "Are so fabulous ♪ ♪ i make homo erectus" "Look like homo habilis ♪ all:" "Ohh!" "♪i spitthehot fire 'cause i invented fire ♪" "♪ then i ate the fire, and it burned my mouth ♪" "♪ so i screamed real loud and spat out the fire ♪" "♪ my advice ♪ ♪ yo, don't eat the fire ♪" "♪ check out my cave art, horses and bison ♪" "♪ here's me and your mama ♪ ♪ that detail is fly, son ♪" "♪ you don't understand modern art at all ♪" "♪ you wipe your ass with your hand and press it" "On the wa-wall ♪ ♪ so many girls want to rub" "My stub ♪ ♪ they come up to me" "And hit themselves with a club ♪ ♪ i got so many cave bitches ♪" "♪ i make rudimentary tools ♪ [ gunfire ] [grunts] homosapiens,mother[bleep] todaywasso fun,baloo." "I loved that song you sang about" "The bare necessities." "andyougetthat"bare"not" "Only means "basic," but also that i'm a bear, right?" "yes,wegetthe wordplay." "goodnight,baloo." "goodnight,littlebritches." "[ snoring ] [ dramatic music plays ] watchout,baloo." "whoa!" "My tacos!" "Hi, rebecca." "hi,baloo." "ooh!" "[ vocalizing ] [ gasps ] aah!" "what'swrong,baloo?" "oh,i 'mhavingthosedreams again about a life where i flew" "A plane and ate tacos and sometimes dressed in drag," "Nominally to solve crimes but mostly because i just enjoyed" "It." "[growls]that'sridiculous." "You've always been a bear in the jungle." "[hissing]who wantstobe  my dinner to-- aah!" "[grunting]" "Aah." "howdidyoudothat ,baloo?" "idon'tknow." "both:" "Aah!" "he'scatchingon ." "agent754is in dangerof" "Remembering his former life as a bush pilot and c.I.A. Asset." "Looks like our plan has fallen into a real "talespin."" "Tailspin, referring to both a plane flying out of control and" "A crazy story." "yeah,wegetthe wordplay." "[ jazz music plays ] [gasps]" "Louie." "[ electricity crackles ]" "You're the missing piece, louie." "And now you're gonna tell me" "About my former life, you dirty [bleep] ape!" "youmeanprojectblackwater?" "huh?" "theyputblackdye inthe water and fed it to the bears in" "The hopes that it would allow them to pilot planes." "474 bears crash-landed." "It was terribly expensive." "You were the only bear that knew how to read an altometer." "altimeter." "see?" "!" "And now that your memory's returned, you're a danger to" "Them." "The things you know -- [ gunshot ] [ dramatic music plays ] [ gunshot ] showyourself!" "Rebecca?" "that'sright." "It's me, baloo." "I can explain everything, as" "Long as a bullet doesn't -- aah!" "no!" "It's payback time." "Drink, sir?" "no,thanks." "areyousure?" "It's..." "Blackwater." "This is gonna be a real drag, by" "Which i mean it'll be tedious and unpleasant, but, also, i am" "A male wearing female garments." "yeah,wegetthe wordplay." "[ gunshot ] [ all screaming ]" "♪ba-bawkbawkbawk♪ ♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪" "♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ♪" "♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ ♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪" "♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ♪" "♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪ ♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk ♪" "♪ ba-bawk bawk bawk-a-wawk wawk bawk bawk ♪" "Ba-gawk!" "Bawk."