"*Some men are good at hunting quail *" "*Some like to sail *" "* While others like to box *" "*Some men prefer to surf*" "* While others like the turf*" "*And lose a lot of money on thejocks *" "*Some men sayjudo is their dish *" "* While others fish *" "* Where mountain waters swirl *" "*But let a girl appear *" "*He'll pursue her *" "*And run his fingers through her curls *" "*And that's the way it's been *" "*Since the world began *" "* The favorite sport of man *" "*Is girls *" "*Some men put on an aqualung *" "*And swim among *" "* The barnacles and pearls *" "*But let a doll appear *" "*He'll pursue her *" "*And run his fingers through her curls *" "*And that's the way it's been *" "*Since the world began *" "* The favorite sport of man *" "*Is girls **" "Sorry." "I wasn't looking." "Hey, you can go now!" "I beg your pardon." "Well, hi." "Um, I-I was going to park here." " How can you?" "I'm already here." " I can see that." "But you'll have to move." "This is my place." "How could it be your place when I'm already in it?" "I park here every day." " Hey, buddy, this your car?" " Yes, officer, it is." " Can't leave it here." " Uh, I'll move it in a minute." " If you don't, you'll find a ticket on it." " Right away, officer." "Now, look, young lady..." "You'd better move your car." "I think he meant what he said." "See that number?" "Of course I see that number." "It's 19." " Well, I'm 19." " You look older to me, but you never can tell." "Oh, we're not talking about my age." "I know, but we've already discussed the parking." "I shouldn't be in a spot like this." "I don't think so either." "Couldn't you find a better place to propose to her?" "Step on it." "It's after 9:00." "I'm not proposing!" "Are we late?" "Not if we hurry." "Better luck next time." "You can't leave your car here!" "I already have, but if you want to move it, go on ahead." " I don't want to move your car!" " Good." "Then just leave it right where it is." "She's not gonna get away with this." "I'll fix her." "Hi, officer." "Find what you're looking for?" "I wasn't looking for anything." "You weren't?" "Just trying to start this car." "Interesting way of doing it." "You mind telling me why?" "So I could move it." " This isn't your car?" " No, it belongs to the girl that just left." " But she's a friend of yours." " I never saw her before." "This is getting more interesting by the minute." "Better let me see your license." "I, uh, must have dropped it or something." "Here it is." "Well, well, well." "Would you mind hurrying?" "I'm late enough as it is." "Simmer down, Abigail." ""Abigail"?" "That's what it says right here." "Let me see that." "This isn't mine!" "You don't know how happy I am to hear that." "Here it is." "Roger Willoughby, hmm?" "Yeah." "You say you don't even know this Abigail Page." "No, I don't!" "Officer, look, this is all very simple." "The young lady parked in my parking space." "I work here..." "Abercrombie and Fitch." "I tried to explain to her, but the whole thing got confused." "You said it was simple." "It should've been, but you know women." "She's the kind that gets you confused." "I meet 'em every day." "She said she was in a hurry." "Then they both started talking. "They"?" "By that time there were two of them." "Two?" "You were in a spot." "Yeah." "She said I could move the car if I wanted to, but she left both doors locked." "Screwy story." "You think I made it up?" "No, no." "It's too real for that." "I got no reason, but I believe you." "Well, if I could just have my driver's license." "Well, I'll need it for another minute." "What for?" "I can't give you a ticket without a license." "A ticket for what?" "For leaving that car over there." "That's the one you should have moved." "Oh, Roger." "There are some customers waiting for you." "I got held up." "Who's first?" "Major Phipps." "He's been in rod and reels since the store opened, and you know the major." "Mr. Willoughby, I wanted to ask you about the best way to catch northern pike." "Well, sir." "Uh, Joe." "I'll be with you in a minute." "Meanwhile, letJoe show you the new nylon lines that came in yesterday." "They'll be well worth your while." "Good morning, Major Phipps." "Fourteen minutes and thirty seconds." "I beg your pardon?" "That's how long I've been waiting for you." "I'm terribly sorry." "I had a little problem in the parking lot." "Let's stop wasting time." "I can get out of a couple of board meetings next week... and make the tournament at..." "Lake Wakapoogee?" "Splendid, splendid." "What can I help you with?" "Rods, reels, lines, lures, spinners, flies, bugs, spoons... the whole mess!" "I see." "Well, then, let's, uh..." "Let's start with the rods." "Cornerstone of the outfit, you know." "Let's see here." "Gonna win this year, Major?" "I intend to keep on trying." "Good." "Oh, here we are." "This is the one I would recommend." "Good morning, Tom!" "It's light, flexible, strong, perfectly balanced." "How does it feel?" "Light." "Would you like to try to make a cast?" "Yes, I think I would." "Mmm." "Oh!" "Look at that." "L" " I-It's my arm." "Machine gun bullets during the war." "I can't get movement..." "I'm ashamed of you." "Why?" "Haven't you read my book?" "Of course I have." "Every word of it." "It says here on page 21, I think..." "Yes. "You need very little movement... to make a good cast with a spinning reel." I must've missed that." "Tom, show the major a couple of casts... and I'll explain it to him as you go." "Now remember, Major, 10:00 position first, 10:00 position first." "Then 11:00, 11:00." "Higher." "Then forward to 9:00." "Try it, Tom. 9:00." "You see?" "Isn't that pretty?" "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Try it again." "See?" "Very little wrist movement." "Would you like to try it, Major?" "I certainly would." "Now remember, gently." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Gently. 10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Hey!" "Look at that!" "Good!" "Good!" "Roger, what would I do without you?" "I wish you were going to stay at the lake during the tournament." "Why haven't you ever entered the tournament?" "I don't seem to have enough time." "Well, you should." "It's a rod, all right." "What kind of fish should I go after?" "Bass, trout, blue gills?" "Let's see..." "Last year the Wakapoogee was won with a bass." "Six pounds, eight ounces, I believe." "I know!" "I saw that old goat Harvey Skaggs land the fish!" "He used a plug, a green Plunking Dingbat." "That's not what I asked you!" "This isn't last year!" "I want to know what to use this year!" "Let's see, Major." "Roger!" "Phone." "Yeah?" "Oh." "Excuse me, Major." "I'll be right back." " Good morning." "Willoughby speaking." " Roger, this is Jim Stern." " Yeah, Jim?" " Listen, I'm up here at Lake Wakapoogee... and I got the doggonedest string of fish you've ever seen." "Well, good for you." "Um..." "Jim, what kind of fish did you go after?" " Trout, like you suggested." " And what would you say is the best time of day?" "Between 10:00 and 11:00 in the morning. 10:00 and 11:00 in the morning." "Uh-huh." "What was the water temperature?" "68 degrees." "68 degrees." "And how deep did you go?" "Just below the surface." "I started with a Colorado Spinner..." " and ended with a Super-Duper." " I see." "Well, thank you, Jim." "I appreciate your calling." "Bye." "Now then, what were we talking about?" "What kind of fish I should go after." "I suggest trout." "Trout." "Mm-hmm." "About 10:00 or 11:00 in the morning, the water should be around 68 degrees." "68 degrees." "What kind of a lure, and how deep?" "Just under the surface, and use either a Colorado Spinner... or a Super-Duper." "Amazing." "A Colorado Spinner or a Super-Duper." "Good morning, Maggie." "Good morning, Roger." "Go right on in." "Oh, thank you." "Well, hi." "Hello." "Good morning, sir." "Willoughby!" "Come in, come in." "Miss Perkins, send in the young ladies, please." "Yes, sir." "Fine morning, isn't it?" "I want you to..." "Ah, here they are now." "Miss Page and Miss Mueller." " Mr. Roger Willoughby." " Yep." "I knew it." " We've met." " Yes, in the parking lot." "Oh, fine." "Please sit down and we'll get on with this." "Thank you." "Miss Mueller is the daughter of Mr. Mueller, who owns the lodge at Lake Wakapoogee." "And Miss Page is director of public relations for the lodge." "I see." "Willoughby, this is your lucky day." " It is?" " Absolutely." "You are entering the fishing tournament at Lake Wakapoogee." "Sir?" "Stuns you, doesn't it?" "You want m-me to fish in the tournament?" "That's right." "As the official representative of Abercrombie and Fitch." "M" " Mr. Cadwalader..." "Don't thank me, thank Miss Page." "It was all her idea." "You know, the more I think of it, the more excited I become." "Your reputation will have considerable influence on the publicity for the tournament," " which will benefit the lodge..." " Beaver." "Oh." "Thank you." "And will benefit us, of course." "I tell you, Willoughby..." "What's the matter?" "Is something bothering you?" "Mr. Cadwalader, it's just that I don't..." "Just what?" "I don't think I should enter the fishing tournament." "Why not?" "Give us one good reason." "Well, because I..." "Well, that's certainly no reason." "I didn't give a reason." "Why?" "Come on." "We're waiting." "Now, now, just a minute." "I think I know what's bothering Willoughby." "You don't think it's fair for the teacher to compete with the pupils." "Exactly!" " They might resent me, and that would defeat your purpose." " Oh, horsefeathers!" "Oh, my goodness!" "Oh, Abby!" "Let me have your handkerchief." "Oh, it's perfectly all right." "Don't worry a bit." "It..." "Forgive us, please." " It'll dry out." "It'll dry out right away." " Well, good." "Silly, isn't it?" "My wife makes me wear it." "I see." "Let's get on with it, shall we?" "Yes, sir." "Yes, Mr. Cadwalader." "Let me see." "Where were we?" "Mr. Willoughby said the other fishermen might resent his entering the tournament, and then I hit the ashtray." "That's exactly what I said." "I don't agree." "They would be flattered." "Oh, they would not!" "It would be like playing on the same team with Mickey Mantle." "It's not the same!" "It's exactly... the same." "Good thing you didn't hit the ashtray." "Stop being so modest." "I'm not being modest!" "They're right, Willoughby.!" "It's just your modesty talking." "I don't want to hear anymore." "Yes, Miss Perkins." "It's 11:30, Mr. Cadwalader." "Thanks, Perkins." "I have a luncheon appointment." "I'll be tied up this afternoon." "Willoughby, why don't you take the young ladies to lunch and explain the details to them." "Uh..." "Miss Page, it was a great idea of yours." "Mr. Cadwalader, didn't you forget something?" "Hmm?" "Your little thingamajig." "Oh." "No, I didn't forget it." "Good excuse not to wear it." "Miss Mueller, thank you very much." "It was a pleasure." "Oh, by the way, Willoughby." "Yes?" "How is your fishing gear?" "Well, sir, with so little chance, I..." "Just as I thought." "We'll get together in the morning and pick out all the equipment you'll need." "Yes." "Good-bye." "Now, look, Miss Page..." "Please." "Please, I-I didn't realize that I had taken your parking space." "I didn't know that you were Roger Willoughby." "I thought some nut pulled up..." "Abby." "Well, I'm sorry." "So, please forgive me." "Please?" "Oh, well, I..." "Please?" "I can't really blame you, Miss Page." "But I wanted to talk to you..." "You couldn't move my car because I locked the doors." "That's not what I wanted to talk to you about." "You'd have had a hard time getting into that car." "That's possible." "The funny thing is, he almost got a ticket." "I got a ticket!" "What, from the policeman?" "That's right." "Oh, no." "Well, I told you you'd better do what he said, didn't I?" "Don't you remember?" "I remember distinctly." "Don't get mad." "You have the faculty..." "Don't forget you have to work together." "That's what I want to talk about!" "I want to get one thing straight." "Do you feel that you are too good to enter our fishing tournament?" "No, I don't!" "Ah, that's what I wanna hear!" "Let's have some lunch." "Miss Page..." "Don't hold a grudge." "I'll make you a deal." "Buy us two martinis, I'll pay for your ticket." "Okay?" "Oh, hell." "Mr. Willoughby, I should have thought that you'd jump at the chance... to go fishing." "Well, ordinarily, I..." "Is it your wife?" "Doesn't she want you to go?" "I don't have a wife." "Then your fiancée?" "Your girlfriend?" "The girl I'm engaged to has nothing to do... with my not wanting to enter the tournament." "At least we know you're engaged... and that you don't want to enter the tournament." "That's right." "I guess we'll just keep wondering why." "I have no intention of discussing the reasons with you." "Uh-huh." "Step right in, please." "You'd better keep on trying." "I will!" "Well, hurry up." "Mr. Willou..." "Oh, no." "What?" "Well, I was just thinking." "If you're up at the lake, you'll be away from the store." "Yes, that's right." "Well, you don't want to risk that, do you?" "Why?" "It's only a job." "I mean, you're afraid of the auditors." "The auditors may come in, go over your books... and find out that you've been playing hanky-panky with the store funds." "What?" "Listen, Roger, how much are you short?" "I'm not short anything!" "Shh." "Shh." "I don't have anything to do with the money in the store!" "She's just talking nonsense!" "How can you say such a thing with those people hearing you?" "They have three seats!" "They might believe you!" "Well, I just didn't think." "You know, I really can't figure you out, Miss Page." "Either you don't know what you're doing, or you just don't care." "Miss Page is so formal, Roger." "Call me Abigail." "I don't want to know you that well." "Even as a total stranger, you're too much trouble." "What'll it be, folks?" "Martini." "Martini." "Make mine a double!" "A thing like that could ruin a man's reputation!" "Do you have a light?" "You can't really believe I'm committing larceny, but you made those people think so." "Before I met you, my life was uncomplicated, peaceful." "Everything was fine." "Didn't have any trouble." "L..." "Even with this lighter I didn't have any trouble." "Are you always in the habit of ruining men's lives?" "Not really." "I just try to do my share." "Who are you?" "I'm confused." "Who is he?" "I don't know, but he's sure got a new approach." "Hi." "We thought we lost you." "That was a pretty girl." "Who is she?" "I don't know." "There you are." "Aren't you going to sit down, Roger?" "I'd rather walk." "Come on." "Don't get mad." "Sit down." "Come." "I'll have another." "Yes, sir." "We were talking, and we couldn't remember... a tournament that you'd ever entered." "Miss Page..." "Abigail." "Miss Page," "I don't compete with other fishermen because I..." "Forget it." "Can't you speak English?" "I'm confused enough." "Here you are, sir." "Roger, please, don't." "What?" "Don't what?" "What?" "Don't take it." "Don't take another drink." "I mean, it must be terrible having a drinking problem." "What?" "We should've known that liquor was your failing." "Now, just a minute, I..." "It's that you're afraid when you go away from home, you can't trust yourself." "That's why you never enter into competition." "You ready for another?" "No!" "Oh, go ahead, Roger." "Don't torture yourself." "I'm not torturing myself!" "I don't compete with other fishermen... for a very simple reason." "What is it?" "If I tell you, do you promise never to breathe a word of it?" "Certainly." "I don't..." "Uh, that'll be $5.40, please." "Let's get out of here." "Where are we going?" "Someplace where no one will hear what I have to say." "Roger, what on earth..." "Never mind!" "Come on!" "Roger, what..." "Would you please explain..." "Have any nickels or dimes?" "Yes." "Get 'em out, will ya?" "Okay, get the nickels." "He's crazy!" "What?" "He's crazy!" "You're right!" "If I tell you, do you promise never to tell anybody?" "Do you?" "All right." "I cannot fish in your tournament... because I've never been fishing in my life!" "What?" "You've never been fishing in your whole..." "No, no, no, no!" "Shh!" "You promised to be quiet." "Oh." "Okay." "Rog..." "Remember." "Did I hear you right?" "I said I've never been fishing in my entire life!" "That's because you're a phony!" "I am not!" "Of course you're a phony!" "Come on." "Don't run off, folks." "The lights'll be on in a minute." "Coming to this place wasn't such a good idea." "Anyway, now you know." "You've never really been fishing?" "Never." "No wonder you don't want to enter the tournament." "It was your idea, Abigail." "I'm sorry." "I was thinking." "You'd better decide what to do." "I may shoot him or myself." "I suggest the latter." "You'd better figure it out." "I have things to do." "Taxi!" "Good-bye." "Don't worry." "I'll keep your secret." "Now that you know I no longer can help you, you'd better tell Mr. Cadwalader you've changed your mind." "Have I?" "Have I changed my mind?" "Hmm?" "Now just a minute..." "If you'll buy me some lunch, we'll discuss the whole thing." "Come on." "I know a nice little place." "You know, you don't look like a phony, Roger." "How did it all start?" "I got a job..." "Mm-hmm." "Selling fishing tackle in a little place." "I listened to my customers." "Fishermen love to talk." "What one customer would tell me, I'd tell the next one." "Then I got a job at Abercrombie and Fitch and read up on fishing." "Why didn't you just fish?" "Because I happen to hate fish..." "To handle them, to smell them." "Oh, no!" "And I brought you to this fish place." "I don't even like them on a plate." "Order ham and eggs." "Yecch." "Listen, it still seems dishonest to me." "Does a man who sells canaries have to learn to fly?" "People ask questions." "I give them answers." "I never claimed to be a fisherman." "You never unclaimed it." "It never seemed important until now." "I'm glad I didn't pay $1.50 for your book." "$2.00!" "$1.50's too much." "Four of my people have won cups." "You'd better start studying it." "Why?" "Because you wanna enter our tournament!" "I have no intention of fishing in your... tournament." "Shh!" "Shh." "Roger, it's up to you." "But you'd look pretty silly if the truth came out." "I'd look like a..." "A phony." "I don't like that word." "But it's true, isn't it?" "No, it isn't." "If the customers learn the truth, I'd lose 'em." "I'd lose my job." "Cadwalader would have me thrown out." "And if I entered your tournament, they'd know." "Maybe." "But they'd be sure to know if..." "You didn't." "Do you mean..." "I'd tell 'em." "I believe you would." "You know I would!" "You don't have to win the tournament." "You just have to make a reasonably good showing." "How?" "You tell me how." "Millions of people know how to fish." "I figure that you could learn, with the right incentive." "Like keeping your job." "Did you take a special course in blackmail, or is it a natural talent?" "It won't do us any good to be bitter, Roger." "I know that you're a phony, and you know that you are." "The tournament begins on Friday, and today's Monday." "If you can be up there with your equipment tomorrow, then we'll have almost three days to teach you." "Who's "we"?" "Easy and I. We're both good." "You don't have anything to worry about..." "Well, maybe one thing." "What?" "The girl that you're engaged to..." "Did you tell her that you don't know how to fish?" "It never came up." "Don't you think you'd feel better if you told her?" "I'll decide what to tell her." "It's risky." "She may throw you out." "Is she rich?" "Miss Page, I don't think that..." "Well, anyway, it's up to you." "Bring your book." "You might learn something from it." "Wh-What about lunch?" "Oh, I never eat lunch." "Bye!" "Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Satur..." "Six days." "I'm liable to kill her." "I'll be with you in just a minute, mister." "White man have long journey?" "Oh, just from San Francisco." "Heap big place." "Many moon ago I take trail to Frisco." "What tribe are you from?" "Me chief Wakapoogee tribe." "My name John Screaming Eagle." "My people own this lake before white man come." "Is that so?" "Sorry to keep you waiting." "Have you a reservation?" "I believe so." "My name is Roger Willoughby." "Oh, of course." "Your name Willoughby?" "Mm-hmm." "My great-grandfather, Roaring Buffalo, once scalped man named Willoughby." "Please, you not be angry." "Oh, I..." "I glad you no angry." "You ever fish Wakapoogee before?" "No." "You, uh, want win tournament?" "Yes." "See this?" "Genuine Screaming Eagle bass plug." "Only six dollar." "This is a cheap imitation of the Chugger Spook." " It's made in Japan and sells for 68 cents." " John, you picked the wrong man." "This is Roger Willoughby, the famous fisherman." "Miss Page has a reservation for you at the lodge, cabin five." "Oh, I don't want a cabin." "I'd like a campsite." "Let me see what I have." "You'd be more comfortable in a cabin." "Oh, no, I..." "They're newly redecorated... air-conditioning, TV," "Gideon Bible, the whole works." "Red man speak with strange tongue." "I just talk that way for the tourists." "Take the cabin." "Oh, no, I, I, uh..." "Why not?" "Well, because my boss wants me to camp." "Well, in the words of our great chief Confucius," ""Man is much better off if he obeys the voice that feeds him."" "Confucius." "I thought he was Chinese." "Chinese-Indian." "I can let you have campsite C-11." "Nice place by the lake." "You'll be happy there." "How do I get there?" "Just follow the road." "Campsites are well marked." "You can't miss it." "When do you expect the rest of your party, Mr. Willoughby?" "I'm alone." "All this equipment, just for you?" "That's right." "How long do you intend to stay?" "Six days." "Six days?" "It'll take him that long to unpack." "Miss Page!" "Miss Page!" " Yeah?" " I have a message for you." "Roger Willoughby isn't coming to the lodge!" "He's at campsite C-11.!" "Thank you!" "What would he be doing there?" "We'd better go see." "We can go by water." "It's faster." "Okay." "Why should this be happening to me?" "Holy smoke." "Look at that camp." ""Step six:" ""Grasp tent at point X and Y," ""except for model 42-B." ""See illustration 13 for further information." "Model 42-B discontinued."" "This must go somewhere inside." "Hi!" "Hi." "Where did you come from?" "Down at the lake." "What are you doing?" "I am setting up a tent!" "Ohh.!" "Are you?" " After which I shall try making a bed." " Can we help?" "Yes." "Go away." "Oh, good.!" "Uh, listen, I'm curious..." "What is all this about?" "This is Mr. Cadwalader's idea of what a well-equipped camper should have." "Well, why are you camping?" "Again, Mr. Cadwalader's idea." "He seemed to be almost inspired, since he met you." "Oh, well, now, don't be angry, Roger." "It wasn't my idea." "Miss Page, Mm-hmm?" "I had time to think while driving up here." "I don't think you can ever get me angry again." "Great." "I'm glad you've come to your senses." "Because this isn't going to work." "Of course it isn't." "What isn't?" "Your camping." "You've never been camping before, have you?" "I'm doing a lot of things I've never done before." "Yes." "Are you supposed to be out of the water with those things on?" "We're not supposed to take them off before we get out of the water." "You don't have time to learn camping." "You'll have enough trouble learning to fish." "After the tournament you can learn how to make your bed." "Mr. Cadwalader tol..." "Phooey on Mr. Cadwalader." "Then what do I tell him?" "What'll you tell him when he sees you camping?" "He isn't going to see me." "Oh, yes, he is." "He phoned for a reservation." "See, smarty?" "He'll be up here tomorrow." "He will?" "Listen, Roger, there's only one thing for you to do." "What?" "Move back to the lodge." "But before he comes." "Then what do I tell him?" "Say that you..." "What?" "I'll think of something." "Yeah." "Oh, sure." "Roger, if anybody sees you here camping..." "They'll know you've never been out of a hothouse before." "We'll help you get all of your stuff packed." "All right, John Screaming Eagle." "Come here." "How long have you been, uh, standing over there?" "There?" "Mm-hmm." "Long enough to know he never been out of hothouse before." "Only for tourists, huh?" "Will, uh, ten dollars make you forget it?" "For twenty, Screaming Eagle was never there." "Five." "She say ten." "Five." "And you can help pack up this stuff." "As the great chief Confucius say..." "Five birds in hand worth 20 who fly away." "You know him better than I did." "Willoughby, did you see this?" "Yes, Major." "I didn't know you entered the tournament." "It was a sudden decision." "You might've warned your customers." "It's going to make the competition stiff for us." "So that's the way you feel." "And you won last year, Mr. Skaggs." "I beat Phipps hands down." "I figured I could do it again." "You just got lucky." "I can still do it." "You're still lucky." "With you in it, it's different." "Then the only sporting thing would be for me to withdraw." "Oh, no..." "What?" "Now, Roger, you see..." "They consider it unfair competition." "I don't care what..." "I feel that I should..." "Hold it, Willoughby!" "Withdraw nothing!" "I've got my 10:00, 11:00, 9:00..." "I've got it down pat, and I'm going after you!" "If Skaggs is afraid to, let's let him withdraw." "Who said I was?" "I'm glad he's here." "You are?" "If I lose to you, I'm losing to a master and I don't mind." "But if I should beat you, that'd be much more glory than beating Phipps." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Oh, stop it." "Just like I said, like playing on the same team with Mickey Mantle, right?" "Listen, gentlemen, if you'll excuse us, we have a little business to talk over." "What?" "Come on, Roger." "Excuse us." "Good night." "You two go ahead." "Yeah." "Come on, Roger." "What for?" "We're gonna buy you dinner." "Is that what she said?" "There." "Now, isn't that nice?" "Just for the three of us." "Very nice." "Glad you like it." "Come on, Roger, sit down." "Come on." "I shouldn't be so nice to you after that sneaky trick you tried to pull out there." "Why don't you just make up your mind that you're stuck?" "Make the best of it." "You and I are going to work together quite a bit of the time." "Why must we be together?" "I have to teach you how to fish." "You don't want to do it on your own, do you?" "No." "Well, then, we have to be together." "We don't want anybody to find out about it." "Oh, say, did you tell your girlfriend, Miss, uh, Connors, that you can't fish?" "I told you that was none..." "But she made a reservation." "I know." "I forgot to tell you." "She's coming up Friday." "I know that too." "Would you like a roll?" "No, thank you." "I'll give you one anyway." "I just don't want to make any trouble for you by saying the wrong thing to her." "I guess you didn't tell her or you'd say so." "No, I didn't tell her." "Is that all right with you?" "Sure, sure, sure." "Hi." "Dinner is ready." "How are you doing?" "Just fine." "Making Roger mad again." "You'd better figure out where you're going to take him tomorrow for his lesson." "Yes." "A quiet place where murder wouldn't be noticed." "Oh, don't be silly." "That's a good idea!" "I know." "No, no, there is a cove at the north end." "Nobody would see you, but you'd better not go together." "I'll take the boat up about 8:00, and you meet me at the north trail." "Where's that?" "You start at the ranger station and go to the end." "But it's too narrow for a car." "Take that little red thing you had at the camp." "The trail bike." "That'd be just perfect, wouldn't it?" "Uh, can you ride it?" "It just so happens that I can." "Well, you're just full of surprises, aren't you?" "Oh..." "Uh..." "Mmm..." "Roger." "What's the matter?" "Never mind." "It's too late." "What do you mean?" "It's just too late." "What are you talking about?" "Does your salad taste good?" "Mm-hmm." "Well, that's good." "It tasted very good." "Why?" "Well, because..." "Nothing." "L..." "I can't tell you." "What are you laughing at?" "Do you really want to know?" "Yes, I want to know what I'm laughing about." "Well, you know, just before you took that first bite, Yeah, go on." "A caterpillar fell out of the tree, right onto your plate." "It was a fuzzy one." "He was crawling around on the plate for a while." "Listen, cheer up." "Have some wine." "Hi there." "Have you a motorcycle just went up the road?" "Yes, I did." "Did it take you long to teach the bear how to ride it?" "It just took a minute." "Well, fell off right around the turn." "Thank you very much." "That's all right." "So long." "Hey, Roger." "I'm sorry I'm late." "Good morning." "Good morning." "Hey, it looks like we're going to get to use all this part of the lake." "What on earth are you wearing?" "They're inflatable waders." "They're what?" "Inflatable waders." "They have a built-in life preserver." "Pull this cord, and the gas bottle inflates the thing, and you don't sink." "Do they work?" "I don't know." "I'm testing them for the store." "You don't need waders to get into the boat." "I do too." "I can't swim." "Oh, no." "You can't run a boat either?" "I've never felt the need." "The need's caught up with you." "Come on." "Get in." "It won't tip." "Huh?" "Uh-uh." "Just relax." "Nothing's going to happen." "Let me outta here." "Get back in there." "Sit in that third seat." "That's a boy." "Go all the way back." "Even if I don't want to?" "Okay, now, stay right there." "You be careful." "The first thing you have to learn is to start the motor." "I thought you were gonna teach me how to fish." "Sometimes it's necessary to run the boat out where the fish are." "All right." "It's as easy as starting a lawn mower." "First take ahold of the starter-rope handle." "Where's that?" "That thing." "This?" "Yank that back hard as you can." "But before you do that..." "Roger!" "Roger, pull the cord on that thing!" "Roger?" "Roger, are you okay?" "Are you all right?" "Bring that boat over!" " Oh!" " You're getting too much air!" "Turn it off!" " O-Oh!" " Turn it off!" "Hold your breath.!" "You gotta let the air out!" "Help me!" "Hold your breath." "Be just a minute." "Abigail!" "There we are." "Bring yourself up!" "Abby!" "Please!" "Abby!" "Please.!" "Roger, hold your breath!" "Abigail, stop!" "Stop, stop!" "Hang on, now." "Isn't that fun, Roger?" "Hang on, Roger." "Here, drink some of this." "This'll warm you up." "Abby." "Hmm?" "Let me see the soles of your shoes." "Why?" "Mm-hmm, that's it." "What?" "I saw the same marks on my back when I was changing my clothes." "Yeah." "I was jumpin' up and down on ya." "Why?" "Because that's the only way I could get the water outta ya." "Just gallons and gallons..." "Excuse me." "Hello?" "Mm-hmm, just a minute." "Mr. Willoughby, please." "It's for you." "Who is it?" "Cadwalader." "Hello." "I just checked in." "What are you doing in your cabin?" "The reason I'm not camping is..." "Miss Page explained all that to me." "Why aren't you at the lake?" "I've been at the lake." " Studied it thoroughly?" " Yes, sir, from top to bottom." "Excellent." "How about our equipment?" "You want some?" "Well, I tested the inflatable waders this morning." "How did they work?" "I couldn't recommend them to our customers." "Very well." "I'll make a note of that, Willoughby." "Just a minute, please." "I have to ring off now." "I have an appointment with a man." "Perhaps you know him." "John Screaming Eagle." "Who?" "He's the head of the Wakapoogee tribe." "He's got some valuable historical relics to show me." "I'll call you later on tonight." "How." "Good afternoon." "Come in." "Did you bring them?" "Shh." "Oh, this is very exciting." "Is this really General Custer's scalp?" "Great Grandfather Roaring Buffalo take in battle Little Big Horn." "Oh, then it must be real." "Screaming Eagle give white chief for present." "I couldn't accept it." "Old Indian custom." "I give you gift." "You give me gift." "Well, uh, what would you like?" "Twenty dollar." "Well, that's reasonable enough." "Hi." "Hi." "What have you been up to?" "I went over to see Roger for a minute." "He had dinner in his cabin." "And how is he?" "Oh, he's all right." "I offered to help him with the fire, but... he said that I'd helped him enough for one day." "He didn't want me to get all worn out." "He's just fine." "Oh, I got so scared today, Easy." "I almost let him drown!" "He can't swim and he got all full of water." "I had to drag him on the shore and sit down on him to pump him out." " And that's when I..." " When you what?" "Oh, huh..." "Gee, I did a silly thing." "I kissed him." "Why, I do not know." "And what did Roger do?" "He didn't kiss me back." "What did he do?" "Nothing." "Why?" "Because he was still unconscious." "You better try it again when he's conscious and find out what he does." "Oh, yeah?" "Okay." "Are you going out with him tomorrow?" "Well, 8:00 in the morning." "Only this time, no boats and no trick waders." "This is a nice place." "It'll be much better than fishing from a boat." "You can't fish from here." "You gotta wade into the lake." "Why?" "Because the fish aren't liable to come this close to shore." "Come on." "It's okay." "You remember, I can't swim." "Oh, Roger, the tournament starts tomorrow." "Come on." "Now, let's see." "Cast out there about 30 feet." "Yeah, but, uh..." "Just pretend you're Major Phipps." "Oh, yeah." "See..." "Okay?" "Yeah." "10:00." "Oh, yeah, 10:00." "Eleven, eleven." "Oh, yeah, eleven." "Uh-huh, and nine." "Ten..." "Yeah." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "That's very good, Roger!" "Oh!" "You hooked a fish!" "Oh!" "Watch him." "He's running." "Here, here." "No, Roger." "Stop him." "How do I do it?" "Blow a whistle?" "Set the drag." "Oh, uh..." "Okay, now reel him in." "Uh..." "Pull it up and reel him in." "Good." "Come on." "Even it off, Roger." "I am." "Please, a little faster." "But not so fast..." "You want it slow or you want it..." "You do it." "You take ahold of that thing and bring him in." "Just do it evenly." "That's good." "Come on." "That's good." "That's good." "Now, watch the fish, would you?" "Okay, pull up." "That's it." "Now reel him in." "Come on, Roger." "Easy, easy..." "There!" "Whoo!" "He's not very big." "He's a fish!" "Yeah, but..." "Take him off the hook." "I'm not gonna touch that thing." "You take it." "It won't bite you." "I can't stand the feel." "They're cold and they wiggle." "You have to take your own fish off the hook in the tournament." "Every fish I catch I have to take..." "Nobody else can." "Now, grab ahold of him and get the hook out." "That's good." "Here, hold it." "Yeah." "Now, stick your finger in there." "There." "That's good." "Hold onto him." "He's slippery." "Don't let go!" "Don't lose him!" "Oh!" "Got away." "Oh, I've got him!" "Yes!" "Yeah?" "Roger, help me!" "Not me, I..." "Oh!" "Ow!" "Roger, are you all right?" "Ooh!" "Hey, hey, I got it." "Here he is." "Huh?" "What's the matter?" "Oh!" "Abby, I got one!" "What're you..." "Oh!" "Oh!" "Oh!" "Don't come near me!" "Help me!" "Forget it!" "You didn't give me one single teeny bit of help." "Boy, you..." "Don't you dare throw him away." "Hang on to that fish." "I mean it." "Roger." "Yes." "How long do I have to hold this thing?" "Until I tell you you can put it down." "Hey, there's Easy." "Hi, Easy!" "Now it's going to rain." "I guess we can go in." "You are going to learn to fish." "You just sit there and hold that thing." "Hi, Easy." "Hi, everybody." "What's up?" "I brought you some..." "I brought you some rain, and I brought you some news." "What are you doing with that fish?" "Learning to hold on to it." "I don't understand." "Did he catch a fish?" "He caught two." "One." "The other one I caught is against all rules of fishing." "So he caught it in his pants!" "Oh, no!" "He can catch fish, but he can't stand to touch them." "I thought if he sat here holding one for a while, he'd get used to it." "Heh!" "I could hold this 'til it turns into a fossil and I still wouldn't get used to it." "You don't have to hold a thing anymore, and you don't have to worry." "Mr. Kilroy's coming." "The Chicago champ?" "That's right." "How do you know?" "The wire just came." "They had to call off the Oregon tournament..." "Bad storm." "He's driving up here this afternoon." "Hoo-hoo!" "Hallelujah!" "Roger, our problems are over." "Oh, yeah?" "Yes, we don't need you anymore." "We don't need you anymore." "You can get out of the tournament." "How?" "Walk up to Cadwalader... and say, "Look, Joe Kilroy's in town and, uh, I quit."" "Just that simple?" "No, you can't do it that way." "Lemme think." "Uh, you know the rain is making your shirt..." "I've got it!" "What?" "If you're not able to fish, you won't be able to enter the tournament, will you?" "I was saying that the..." "Did you hear me?" "I said, if you're not able to fish, you won't be able to enter the tournament, will you?" "You can break your leg!" "I'd rather fish." "Or an arm." "I'd rather fish!" "I'm tryin' to tell ya..." "I don't mean really break your arm, but... what happens when you break your arm?" "It snaps and it hurts." "What happens when you have to treat it?" "You put a cast on it." "You've got it!" "Anybody who sees a cast on somebody's arm assumes they've got a broken arm." "We know a little first aid." "We get some plaster of Paris, go into that woodshed and get all that stuff and put it on him." "Yeah." "Roger, are you paying any attention?" "Yes, I am." "Why aren't you looking at us, then?" "Because you look like you haven't any clothes on." "That's what I've been trying to tell you." "Come on." "Let's go." "Let's go change." "Then we'll meet in Roger's cabin." "Yeah." "Roger, are you gonna carry that thing with you?" "Well, too bad, because you were just learning to pick it up." "I'm really gonna kill her." "I'm really gonna do it." "Hey, Easy." "Look what I found." "Just exactly what we need." "They're perfect." "Please hold your arm out." "What're you gonna do?" "Hold still." "I wanna measure this." "What for?" "Well, because we can't let all that plaster stick to you." "Do you have a pair of scissors?" "I've got a knife." "Just as good." "Hey, stop that!" "Don't make so much trouble." "That's the only pair of long underwear I have." "They're still good." "They are, huh?" "One leg is a little shorter than the other, that's all." "Now take off your shirt." "What're you gonna do with my shirt?" "We can't put the cast on over your shirt." "Oh." "Easy, are you ready?" "Yes, I'm ready." "Here now." "Put this leg on." "And tell me, how do you want to wear your arm?" "What do you mean?" "In what position do you wanna hold your arm?" "In a sling, I guess." "Something like that?" "Okay, that's all right." "Now, hang on." "There." "Does that seem like the same position, the same angle?" "Mm, I think that's all right." "Hold it exactly like that." "I'll put this here so you don't get too dirty." "You start with the plaster." "I'll start with the bandage." "Okay." "Put your arm down." "Come on." "You just told me to keep it up." "We come back to that later." "Oh, boy!" "Hey, this stuff is gettin' all squishy." "This is all there is left." "Should I make some more?" "I think that's enough." "What am I supposed to do after I get this thing on?" "Weren't you even listening to us out there?" "I was a little bit distracted with the rain and everything." "I'm not quite sure I understand what I'm supposed to do." "Would you please tell him?" "After we're through, we'll explain... that you broke your arm." "How?" "You fell out of this tree." "That's the way my brother broke his arm." "What was I doing in the tree?" "Well..." "What was I doing?" "I know." "There was this little teeny bird that had fallen out of its nest, and you were taking it back to its mother." "And you're going to tell people that?" "Don't you think I should?" "Don't you think they'll cry?" "I'll think of something." "Don't worry." "I hope so." "Don't move." "I'll get it." "Wait, it might be Tex." "I wouldn't want her to find a strange woman in my cabin." "Oh, I can take care of that." "Big Chief Screaming Eagle here." "Who speak other end?" "Who is it?" "Harry?" "It's me." "It's the desk clerk." "What do you want?" "The ranger just called." "He said to tell you Mr. Kilroy was on his way to the lodge." "Oh, okay." "Thanks, Harry." "What is it?" "Mr. Kilroy just passed by the ranger station." "We have to get cleaned up before we meet him." "We better go!" "You're not gonna leave me like this?" "Don't worry." "We'll be back." "We have to wait 'til the cast hardens, anyway." "How long will that take?" "If you don't have a watch, let me set this thing for ten minutes." "When the bell goes off, your cast is done." "Stay there 'til the bell rings." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "How did it happen there, Willoughby?" "Well, an itty-bitty bird fell on the ground... and I was taking it back to its mother." "Oh, no." "This is all wrong." "It oughta be like this." "It's all this up here." "Why'd they have to put it on my shoulder?" "You'd think they were plastering a house." "They've got to get me out of this." "Here comes your friend." "Evening, Major." "Evening." "First time I've been saluted in years." "That really felt good." "Nice boy." "Very thoughtful." "Yes, he is." "Ten-shun." "See that guy?" "Roger, thank goodness!" "I was looking for you." "I was looking for you." "Look at this arm." "Look how I have to hold it." "It just doesn't make any difference anymore." "It does to me." "No, it doesn't." "Come here and look through this window." "Why?" "You see that man with the cast on his arm?" "Yeah." "That is Joe Kilroy, our Chicago champion." "He had an automobile accident." "You can't both have broken arms." "His really is broken." "You mean I can't tell people about the itty-bitty bird?" "Right." "I could've thought of something better." "Come on." "We have to get that off your arm." "This saw ought to be just the thing!" "I don't think..." "Put your arm down." "He's right." "We couldn't tell where the cast stops and the arm begins." "I think you're right." "How about the snippers?" "Put your arm down." "I don't think..." "There's not enough room between the cast and the arm." "That doesn't work." "I'm gonna call a doctor." "Wait, hold still." "That's pretty hard." "A chisel and hammer ought to do it." "Put your arm right down there." "Come on." "Put your arm down." "Lean over this way." "Down flat so she can work on it." "Oh..." "Uh..." "Ooh!" "Ohh!" "That isn't going to work!" "I know!" "Put his arm over there in that vise." "I'm going to get a doctor." "You want that thing off or not?" "Well, yes, but..." "Then put your arm in here." "That's good." "Wind him up tight." "Okay." "This, this, this..." "I'll get it." "Here we are." " Oh, uh, uh..." " Hey, this is gonna work fine!" "You're not gonna use that thing on me!" "You said you wanted it off." "Not with that thing!" "It'll be all over in a moment." "That's what I'm afraid of!" "You'll never even know it happened." "O" " O-Oh, please, Abby!" "Shh!" "Roger." "Hello?" "Hello, Roger?" "I can't sleep." "Mm-hmm." "Who is this?" "This is Abigail." "I can't sleep." "Do you know what time it is?" "Just a minute." "I don't..." "I know what..." "Hello?" "Hello?" "I had to go in the other room to look at the clock." "It's 1:30." "I know it's 1:30." "You do?" "Well, why did you ask?" "Of course I do!" "I just wanted to see if you knew." " Yes, I just told you." "It's 1:30." " What is it that you want?" "You don't happen to have any sleeping pills on you, do you?" "Yes." "Oh, good." "I'll be right over." "Hey, wait a minute." "Say, uh, when will you be back?" "I don't know!" "Just a minute." "Hi." "Here's your sleeping pill." "This is better than a corner drugstore." "Thanks." "Uh, Roger, could I have a glass of water?" "I can't take these dry." "I suppose so." "I'm so glad that you hadn't gone to bed yet because I couldn't sleep, and I thought maybe..." "What are you doing?" "I'm taking my coat off." "Why?" "Because it's warm in here." "Anyway, I was thinking maybe you would be awake, thinking about tomorrow... and you might want to play a little gin rummy." "I do not want to play gin rummy." "My, but you're grumpy." "Is something bothering you?" "What would people think, you wandering over here, dressed like that?" "They might think I have funny-looking legs." "Yours are kind of funny looking too." "Here's your water." "Take your pill." "Mmm, thank you." "My, that's an ugly-looking pill." "I don't think I want it." "What?" "Didn't you just ask me..." "Well, I asked, all right." "But I changed my mind." "Don't you ever change your mind?" "Like sometimes you want somebody to do something," " then you find you don't want 'em to do it at all." " Like what, for instance?" "Like, uh..." "Go on." "Just a minute, I'm thinking." "Tell me." "Like, uh, kissing." "Kissing?" "Mm-hmm." "What has kissing got to do with the sleeping pill?" "Very little." "We were talking about asking someone to do something, then changing your mind." "You see?" "No." "Let me put it this way." "Sometimes you meet somebody and you start wondering what it would be like if he kissed you." "And you can hardly stand it until he does kiss you." "And when he does you expect maybe bells are gonna ring." "You think maybe you'll come unglued and you'll fly out in all directions." "And you know what happens?" "I can't imagine." "Nothing." "Mm-mm." "Nothing." "Nothing?" "You don't want him to kiss you anymore because you've changed your mind." "You see why I do not want to take the pill?" "It's not too clear." "Are you gonna take that thing or not?" "Well, I guess it wouldn't kill me, would it?" "What are you holding your nose for?" "Because I cannot stand the taste of it." "What does holding your nose got to do with tasting it?" "Say, that's a great idea, Roger." "Are you hungry?" "I could fix us some sandwiches and coffee." "No." "I am not hungry, and you should not take coffee with a sleeping pill." "Why?" "Because it's a stimulant." "Oh?" "What should I take?" "Milk." "Hot milk." "Have you got some?" "Why did you suggest it?" "No." "I didn't." "I was saying..." "You did say coffee would be the thing I shouldn't take..." "I don't have any coffee, any milk, and it's after 2:00 in the morning." "I know." "And here I am, keeping you awake and you have to fish tomorrow." "That's right." "I don't know, Roger." "Everything I do seems to be wrong." "When I got the idea of getting you up here, it seemed to be just the way to help Easy and her father." "And I've given you nothing but trouble, and you've been so sweet about it." "I haven't been sweet about it." "You've been a stinker some of the time." "But that's because I was wrong." "I deserved it." "Anyway, I don't think you'd believe me if I told you I was sorry." "But I really am." "Now, Abigail, I..." "You're not angry?" "Well, no." "I mean..." "Oh, Roger, when you're sweet to me like this, it just..." "Mm." "Oh, oh." "Wh..." "What's the matter?" "Roger?" "What is it?" "You know what we were talking about before?" "Uh, sleeping pills." "No, no." "Do you remember what we were talking about?" "Wanting someone to do something, and then wondering what it would be like if he did it?" "You mean kissing?" "Yes." "Roger, I have to ask you a question." "What is it?" "Would you please like to kiss me?" "Oh..." "Would you?" "Uh, that's the telephone." "Shh!" "All right, all right." " Hello?" " Hello, Willoughby." "This is Major Phipps." "What can I do for you?" "I'm here with your boss, Harvey Skaggs and Jim Bush, and we want to ask you some questions before the tournament starts." " We'll be over right away." " What did you say?" "We'll be over right away." "Uh, Major, just a minute." "Where are you?" " At the bar in the lodge." " Good." "I could use a nightcap myself, so I'll come over there." "Well, hurry up." "Yes, right away." "Now I have to get over to the lodge." "They were coming over here." "It wouldn't do at all for you to be found here." "I've got to get over there." "I'll see you tomorrow." "Roger, where do you keep your cigarettes?" "Are you still there?" "Yes, I wanted to ask you something." "Oh, I found the cigarettes." "Abby, I've got to get over to the lodge." "I know." "I'm not keeping you." "But you didn't answer me, and I had asked if you'd like to kiss me." "Oh, for Pete's sake." "I haven't got time!" "I ask him if he would like to kiss me, and he says he hasn't got time." "Well, he could've meant it that way." "Might've been nice." "If you specialize on trout or bass, you have more of a chance on getting the big one." "And it's usually the big one that wins the tournament." "Makes sense." "That's good enough for me." "You've been a lot of help." "It's all in the book." "Why don't you buy one?" "All your money, you can't take it with you." "I can buy another drink for everybody but you." "Not for me." "I'm too tired." "I'll buy my own." "I'm gonna turn in." "Good night." "Good night." "Good night." "He's a great guy." "A real sportsman." "Not many people'd help out a competitor." "Cadwalader, you're lucky to have a man like that." "We at the store feel very fortunate." "Abigail.!" "A" " Abigail, w-wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "You can't stay here." "Wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "She's out cold." "She took that sleeping pill." "I gotta get some sleep." "Gotta be up in three hours." "I'll bet you $50 I top you." "I'll take it." "And another $25 a day additional." "I beg your pardon, I'm the desk clerk." "Have you seen Mr. Willoughby?" "He just left here." "Oh, that's why his cabin didn't answer when I called." "What did you want with him?" "Miss Connors." "She called from San Francisco." "Miss Connors?" "Was the message important?" "The girl he's engaged to." "She was going to spend the night at Green Valley, but arrive here early in the morning." "I wouldn't wake him for that." "Yes, sir." "Why not let Miss Connors surprise him?" "Yeah, why not?" "How about another drink?" "Charlie, come in here." "Who is it?" "It's me, Easy." "Let me in." "What do you want?" "I am looking for Abigail." "She's no..." " Who did you say it was?" " Easy." "Can't you hear me?" "Yes, I heard you." "Just a minute." "Roger, are you going to let me in?" "Yes, just a minute." "Soon as I can." "Good morning, Roger, I was..." "What on earth are you doing in that thing?" "The zipper's stuck." "See if you can help me." "First, where is Abigail?" "How should I know?" "She came over here last night, and she didn't come back." "She didn't?" "No." "Now, where is she?" "In there." "Well, Roger!" "Look, I didn't have anything to do..." "You didn't?" "She took a sleeping pill." "I slept on the floor." "Very romantic." "What a pity." "Don't you believe me?" "Sure." "But I better get her out of here." "First help me outta this thing." "I think the zipper's jammed." "All right." "Let's see." "I can't seem to..." "Wait a minute." "It is stuck, isn't it?" "I'm trying to find Mr. Roger Willoughby." "He's in cabin number five." "Yes, ma'am." "That's right over there." "Thank you kindly." "Ow.!" "Don't be so rough." "Hold still." "It's not my fault that the zipper is stuck." "I didn't say it was your fault." "I just wanna get out of this." "Okay." "Put your hands up top here." "Hold on and I'll pull." "Well, I'll try, but..." "Good morning." "Why, Tex!" "Uh, I didn't expect to see you." "Obviously." "Didn't you get my message?" "No, uh, I didn't." "I reckon you didn't." "Uh, who's this?" "Oh, this is Miss, um..." "Mueller." "And Miss..." "I guess you're gettin' awfully mixed-up, Roger." "Connors." "So, you're Easy?" "How do you do?" "Yeah." "His zipper got stuck..." "Tex, if you're wondering what I'm doing in this..." "What could you be doing in a thing like that?" "I slept in it." "Why?" "What do you mean, why?" "It seems a funny thing to do." "Don't they have beds in these cabins?" "Of course they have." "I was trying out some new equipment." "New equipment?" "Yes, for the store." "And Miss Mueller happened to come by and find you?" "Exactly." "Isn't that nice?" "And, uh, she was helping you with your zipper?" "It was stuck before." "Good morning." "Willoughby, do you know what time it is?" "You have less than ten minutes before starting time." "Yes, I'm sorry." "I'll get dressed right away." "Before y'all start, may I use your bedroom?" "Oh, no, Tex!" "I feel all dusty, and I'd like to freshen up." "But Easy can take you over to the lodge." "I'll be glad to show you." "Thank you very much." "Roger, I'll see..." "Good morning, everyone." "Roger, is this some of the equipment you're tryin' out?" "I hope the story..." "Tex, she came in last night just to borrow a sleeping pill." "There's no use explaining." "She's never gonna believe you." "I certainly won't believe you." "Good-bye!" "Uh, but, Tex!" "Just a minute, Miss Connors." "Don't do anything foolish." "Just be thankful that Willoughby has sown his wild oats before you were married." "Now he's got them all out of his system." "Haven't you, Willoughby?" "I did not sow any wild oats!" "Then what were you doing..." "You mean that zipper was really stuck, and all she wanted was a sleeping pill?" "Ohh!" "Wait!" "Tex, please." "You gotta listen to me." "There's a perfectly simple explanation." "I don't wanna hear it." "That's not fair." "You've got..." "Hey, only got five more minutes." "All the other fishermen will be wearing pants." "Tex, I've gotta go or I'm gonna lose my job." "You got to wait until tonight so I can explain everything." "Will you do that?" "Do you really think you can explain?" "I can if you'll listen." "All right." "Good." "I don't know why, but I'll be here." "I'll call you." "It'll be sometime after 6:00." "Okay." "Willoughby, I don't mind your having fun, but remember, you're representing the store." "Mr. Cadwalader, I've taken just about all I'm gonna take." "I don't think you're concentrating on this tournament!" "Shut up." "Very well, Willoughby." "Roger, I'm sorry." "I didn't mean to make all this trouble." "Everything you do makes trouble." "I just fell asleep!" "That's why I was in your bed." "Why come out and act as though..." "As though what?" "Make Tex think what she did?" "Wasn't she mad?" "She was about the maddest woman I've ever seen." "Is this here some new equipment that you are trying out?" "Well, I do not believe it!" "Don't hit me, Roger." "I'm going in there and get dressed." "If you're still here by the time I come out..." "Willoughby.!" "Yes, I'm coming!" "You've got three minutes." "Mm-hmm." "Okay." "Good." "Bye." "Gentlemen, welcome to the 36th annual Wakapoogee fishing tournament." "Printed copies of the rules have been made available to all of you, but I'm gonna run over them again in case some of you missed a few." "There'll be three days fishing." "Your best fish of each day will count in your total points." "The tournament day will start at the sound of this bell." "All fish must be weighed in by sundown." "Are there any questions?" "In that event, gentlemen, the best of luck to all of you." "Well, Willoughby, I see you decided to wear pants after all." "Yeah." "The fish might have gone for those polka-dot pajamas." "Well, here we go." "May the best man win." "Good luck, Major." "He'll need it." "I'm gonna beat you because I've got his book." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "The man with this book wins." "Well, come along." "Come along, Napoleon." "This way to Waterloo." "You just read the book." "He wrote it." "Ah. "Fish are likely to be found... about 20 yards from the shore."" ""When casting, always aim the hook at one particular spot."" "Ow!" "Oh." "Oh." "Read this book..." "Fishing reel." "Now..." "Oh." "Come back here." "And to think they call this... fishing "fun."" "I suppose you saw the whole thing." "Amazing." "Absolutely amazing." "Not even Confucius could comment on what I saw." "Now you want five dollars not to tell people about it?" "No, no, no." "This one's on the house." "Nobody'd believe it." "That's quite a fish you caught." "Yeah." "Take a real big one to beat you today." "White man turning blue." "White man need fire inside, make white man warm." "When red man talk like that, white man knows something's coming." "All right, go ahead." "Want a drink?" "What is it?" "Old Indian drink, formerly made from moose blood 'til we ran out of moose." "What's in it now?" "Low cholesterol tribal herbs, safflower oil, a little alcohol, 120 proof." "Very good." "How much?" "Five dollars." "For one drink?" "Ha!" "One drink, whole bottle." "Five dollar minimum." "As the great Chief Confucius..." "Never mind." "Too cold." "Ah!" "Pretty good." "Roger Willoughby, five pounds, eight ounces." "I got you beat!" "That's a nice fish, Willoughby, but Major Phipps leads you by three ounces." "You mean the Major and I..." "Sure." "We're ahead of the whole bunch." "Unless somebody else comes in with a bigger one real soon." "Never thought I'd beat you." "Well, Major, you're one of the few people that can say that." "I just went by your book." "That's all." "Good." "Keep it up." "Told you, Skaggs." "The man with the book wins." "Yeah." "How much did that little sardine you caught weigh?" "Never mind." "I'll pay you the $50 I owe you... if you'll stop talking about it." "Why don't you pay me now?" "Hello?" "Hello." "Oh, hello, Roger." "How'd y'all do in the tournament?" "Pretty well." "I got a big one." "I'm in second place." "Well, good for you." "Hey, you don't sound as mad as you were." "Well, it could be I cooled off a bit." "When I thought about it, it just didn't seem quite like you." "Just how did you mean that?" "Not like you think." "All right." "I'll come by and pick you up." "Oh, Roger, I'm just putting on my dress." "Why don't you go to the lodge, and I'll meet you there, okay?" "All right." "Hurry up." "Okay." "Bye." "We hear you are second in the tournament, Mr. Willoughby." "Yeah, I was lucky." "Would you like a drink out here?" "Yes, thank you very much." "I'd like that." "Vodka martini on the rocks." " Make it two of'em." " Yes, sir." "Oh, congratulations, Roger." "You had a great day." "Or is that the usual?" "The unusual." "Keep it up." "I'm betting on you." "Oh, Roger, we are so proud of you!" "We're all excited!" "Abby just couldn't believe it." "You know what she said?" "No." "She said, "I knew Roger could do it." Hmm?" "Well, she said it." "Doesn't sound like her." "Oh, are you still mad at her?" "Why?" "Because of what she said to Tex." "You speak as though Abby meant to make trouble." "Trouble?" "That girl is a walking disaster." "Every time I'm near her, something awful happens." "Is that why you, why you kissed her?" "What?" "When?" "Last night." "She asked me to." "She doesn't know what she's doing." "She did?" "Oh, Roger, do you always know what you're doing?" "Of course I do!" "And last night you kissed her." "Well, I'd hardly call it a kiss." "That's what Abby said, but you did kiss her." "Yes, I did!" "You see, that's a beginning." "Oh, uh, two drinks." "Are you expecting somebody?" "Is Tex coming?" "Yes, she is." "Well, then I better make it quick." "We were talking about..." "You kissed Abby." "And I say this is some kind of a beginning, isn't it?" "Beginning?" "Of what?" "Don't you know what psychiatrists say?" "No." "The love impulse, Love impulse!" "Especially in a male, shows itself first in conflict." "That's probably why Abby and you fight all the time." "What?" "Are you nuts?" "You're as crazy as she is!" "But, Roger, after all we have done for you!" "And Abby worked so hard to teach you how to..." "You catch one fish, and now you start talking like this!" "Oh, it just makes me mad!" "Uh, Easy, wait." "Roger, I don't want to talk to you." "I'm mad!" "Don't turn around!" "Just stand still." "Take off your hands!" "What's the matter with you?" "Feel the back of your dress." "What?" "Your dress." "Oh, Roger, did you do that?" "Of course I didn't do it." "You must have caught it on the back of the chair." "Well, do something about it, but don't go away." "I won't." "We've got to get out of here." "We'll just walk." "Okay." "Right." "Now, start with your right foot." "Ready?" "Willoughby!" "I want to tell you something." "Willoughby!" "Ah, there, Willoughby, I've been looking for you." "I'll be with you in a minute, Cadwalader." "I'm afraid that boy's in trouble again." "Phew!" "I thought we'd never get out of there." "Let me have a look." "I can't see here." "Let's go to the light." "Better hurry up." "Somebody's liable to come along." "Roger, I think this thing is stuck." "Do you think you can fix it?" "Yeah, let me try." "Roger, you better hurry." "I think..." "I am hurrying!" "Roger, somebody is coming!" "Oh, my tie!" "Wait a minute!" "As soon as we get to..." "Well, Roger, just how do you explain this?" "Well, Tex, I..." "Every time I see you, you're up to your neck in zippers." "It was an accident." "My..." "She sat in a wicker chair..." "And you just got your tie caught in her zipper." "I tell you, it was an accident." "I don't want to marry a man who has as many accidents as you do.!" "Good-bye, Roger!" "And don't bother to call me." "Get this tie out of here." "Uh, I..." "I..." "You... fish!" "Major Phipps, four pounds, three ounces." "Good, good, good." "Congratulations, Major." "That's high for the day so far." "All right, dig in your pocket, Skaggs." "Come on." "Pay up!" "I'll give you the $50, but if you mention that book, I'll make you eat it." "What about, Willoughby?" "What did he do?" "He hasn't checked in yet." "There's still 20 minutes left." "You still think you can beat him?" "I led yesterday." "You want to bet on today?" "Sure, I do." "Certainly." "All right, between you and Willoughby, I'll bet..." "Here comes Willoughby now." "What kind ofluck did you have, Willoughby?" "Oh, just fair." "Hey!" "Wow!" "Fair, he said." "You still want to bet?" "Roger Willoughby, four pounds, eight ounces." "Congratulations, Willoughby!" "Fine work." "You two are out in front again." "Only, Willoughby, now you lead the major by... what is it... three or two." "Two ounces." "I'm sorry, Major." "Don't be ridiculous." "I'm tickled to be that close." "Two ounces isn't much of a lead." "I might make it up tomorrow." "You might just do that." "I'll see you." "You want to bet on tomorrow?" "Against Willoughby?" "What for?" "I make enough money off you." "Hi there." "Hmm." "Well, now, that is an enthusiastic greeting." "I was gonna ask you a question." "I think I'll ask anyway." "Did you ever dream that on the second day of the tournament, you'd be in first?" "Now that's an intelligent question." "I thought you'd say something like that." "How did you catch that fish?" "You didn't tell me about the first one." "How'd you get this one?" "I was climbing up a tree..." "Oh, please, don't give me that stuff about the bird." "You're not gonna answer me, are you?" "No." "Why?" "What's the matter, Roger?" "Nothing." "Let me have another drink." "Oh, no, thanks." "I don't really care for one." "You're sure?" "Positive." "Is it Tex?" "You couldn't convince her, could you?" "Not in two words." "What?" "What two words? "Hello, Tex."" "Then she hung up." "Did you call her back?" "Four times. "Hello, Tex." Hang up. "Hello, Tex."" "I couldn't get past "Hello, Tex." Now she's gonna have to call me." "Oh, she will." "Mm-hmm." "Yeah." "Yes, sir, she'll make up some kind of an excuse." ""Roger, did you all leave your cigarette lighter in my apartment?" "Oh, you didn't?" "Well, I guess it was some other gentleman caller then."" "She'll make you call her back somehow." "She's gonna have to wait a long time." "How many drinks have you had, Roger?" "Confucius say, "Woman who stick nose in other people's drink... is liable to get it punched."" "Confucius also say that fisherman who have too many martinis only catch olive." "I suppose you're right." "Let me have a check, please." "Come on." "I'll walk you home." "I hate domineering females." "I'll walk you home." "Okay." "Roger?" "Hmm?" "You know last night when Easy's dress came unzipped?" "Did you tell her that you thought I was crazy?" "Yes, I did." "I was kind of upset by the way everything was happening." "Mm-hmm." "Well, it's all right." "I don't mind." "After all the trouble I've made for you," "I don't blame you if you don't like me." "Oh, it isn't I don't like you, Abigail." "Matter of fact, there are times..." "What kind of times?" "Times when I find you... strangely attractive." ""Strangely attractive?"" "What do you mean?" "What's "strangely attractive?"" "Well, like a bird watching a snake." "Now I'm a snake." "That's good." "Go right in there and..." "I didn't mean it like that." "I mean it's... kind of a fascination." "I never know what you're gonna do next." "Oh, yeah?" "It's like living on the slopes of a live volcano." "Oh, well, I like being a live volcano better than being a snake!" "That's a pretty good line, Roger." "I mean you're exciting." "Oh, Roger, you mean there are times when you like me?" "Yes!" "Well, for Pete's sake, why didn't you just come right out and say it?" "I just did." "Well, you said, "strangely attractive."" "That's something you say to the bearded lady at the circus." "All right, Abigail." "There are times when I like you." "Is this one of them?" "I guess it must be, because right now..." "Right now I'm wondering what it would be like if I kissed you." "You're wondering?" "Yeah." "Well, for Pete's sake, don't just stand there." "I mean, do something." "I mean, don't just stand there." "Are you gonna do it or not?" "Uh, I go out of my mind..." "Will you shut up?" "Ooh." "Mmm." "Well, no!" "What's the matter?" "What?" "That wasn't any good." "What wasn't any good?" "That kiss." "What?" "The kiss wasn't any good." "Well, I'm sorry, Roger, but you shouldn't waste your time if you want to kiss me again..." "Of all the nerve." "Because it won't ever work out." "Because I'll always look at you as a friend." "Yeah." "Even though you can't kiss, it doesn't make any difference." "I just am sorry, but what else am I gonna say?" "Oh, hell!" "I wasn't finished, Roger." "I had a few other..." "Oh, got it snarled again." "Ow!" "Oh, uh..." "Uh..." "Uh..." "Better pull him up on the bank." " Roger, look behind you!" " I will in a minute!" "Roger, you dope.!" "Would you please look where you're going.!" "Come on, you!" "Get out of there!" "Come on!" "Ooh." "Go on.!" "Get going.!" "Hey, Roger, hurry up!" "You've got a fish, a big one!" " Well, you get him!" " I can't!" "It's against the rules!" "Come on!" "No, no, no!" "Roger, get the net!" "Oh!" "Oh, Roger!" "Oh, that's a beauty!" "A real big one!" "Oh, I bet nobody..." "Jeepers." "What's the matter with you?" "Oh, my goodness!" "I never thought it'd happen." "You're liable to win this tournament." "Probably." "Then what?" "And then what?" "Than I'll write a new book on how to catch a fish." "You know how you do it?" "You sit on a log and turn your back to the fish." "Or you climb up a tree and fall on it." "Or you drag it up on shore until a bear tells you that's far enough." "That's a fine way to catch fish." "Yeah." "Well, it's all my fault." "I got you into this mess." "Well, at least I don't have to catch any more." "What do you mean by that?" "I mean the tournament's over." "After I turn this one in, I don't want to see another fish." "No, I suppose you don't." "Suppose you don't." "I'll see you." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." " Yeah?" " Willoughby?" "Yes?" "This is Cadwalader." "Well, boy, I always knew you had it in you." "Mr. Bagley just came in with the final score." "You are now officially the winner of the Wakapoogee tournament." "Willoughby?" "Do you hear me?" "Yes, Mr. Cadwalader, I heard you." "Is there something wrong?" "No." "Why don't you come over here now and have a drink with us and celebrate?" "Yes." "Willoughby, are you..." "Unpredictable fellow, that Willoughby." "Real genius." "Something's wrong with him." "Celebrate." "Who is it?" "Roger, it's me, Abby." "Come on in." "I have to talk to you." "I don't feel like talking, Abby." "I know, but I've got something I have to tell you." "I know you're not gonna like it, and I don't like saying it." "Abigail..." "But if you'll just let me say it, then I'll go away and won't bother you any more." "Abigail..." "Now let me finish, please." "Actually, there are two things I have to say." "The first is that this has all been my fault and I'm sorry." "I'm very sorry." "Because I won the tournament?" "That's the second thing I have to say." "You can't take that trophy." "You just can't take it." "Abigail..." "Now, please let me finish." "You can't take that." "You've got to tell them the truth." "Do you know what'll happen?" "I know it'll mean you'll lose your job and your customers, but you've got to do that." "Once you start fooling people, you have to go on and keep on fooling them and, and... you're too nice a guy to be a phony... and keep on being a phony." "Now, that's all I'm gonna say." "If you'll..." "Just go ahead and do that." "I just couldn't tell her I'd already decided to do it." "It's funny." "She makes it easier for me." "Hi." "Congratulations." "Thanks." "Well, Willoughby." "Here's the champion." "What'll you have, Willoughby?" "Make it something expensive." "Skaggs is buying." "Not for you." "I'm buying this one, gentlemen." "Before we have anything to drink," "I'd like to tell you something." "Yeah?" "What is it?" "Excuse me just a minute." "Mr. Bagley, would you mind coming over here for a minute?" "I'd be glad to." "I'd like you to hear this." "All right." "There's the trophy, all shined up for you." "Yeah, that's just what I want to talk to you about." "That trophy isn't mine." "What?" "What?" "You're the winner." "Major Phipps is the winner." "You're off your rocker." "I didn't win." " Yes, you did, Major." " Phipps didn't win." "I told you that." "Willoughby, you haven't been drinking, have you?" "Not enough to make any difference." "And you feel all right?" "Yes." "Willoughby, I weighed those fish myself." "Gentlemen, please, let me talk." "I saw it." "L" " I-I..." "I owe you an explanation." "L..." "I want to apologize." "You all took it for granted that I knew all there was about fishing." "L" " I-I wrote a book on it." "I must be a fisherman." "Yeah." "Up until this tournament, I've never been fishing in my life." "Are you telling the truth?" "Yes, I am." "Then, Willoughby, you must be a..." "Fraud." "That's probably the word you're looking for." "Maybe a phony too." "And maybe you're right." "I never said I was a fisherman, did I?" "No, you didn't." "I guess he didn't." "I only told you how to fish." "And you told it good." "What about the three fish you won the tournament with?" "Well, now..." "Yeah!" "You didn't catch them out of a book!" "That was dumb luck." "It was a sheer accident." "No relation to fishing as you all know it." "But you caught them." "Oh, yeah." "One of them caught me." "The second one committed suicide while my line was hung over a branch." "What about the third one?" "I hooked that one, all right." "Then why are you disqualifying?" "Isn't there something in the rules that says a fisherman can't get any outside help?" "Yes, there is." "From any living source." "This one was living, all right." "I got help from a bear." "Which disqualifies me." "Look, fellas, I didn't earn the trophy." "Major Phipps did." "Well, by George." "This never happened before." "Willoughby, I'm stunned." "Completely stunned." "You're fired, of course." "I expected to be." "Congratulations, Major." "Thank you." "Good night, gentlemen." "Good night, Willoughby." "Well?" "Well, I don't know what to say." "Well, don't fall on your sword about it." "What?" "That's a joke, son." "Hell, I just won a tournament!" "I don't feel much like celebrating, but I'll try." "Make mine a triple... because I understand you're buying." "Good company, isn't he?" "Easy, I thought you were never coming." "You wanted to see me?" "The desk clerk told me that you asked..." "That was a half an hour ago." "I was beginning to wonder... if you'd disappeared off the face of the earth too." "Who's disappeared?" "Abigail!" "I looked all over the place for her." "Where is she?" "Well, she..." "She's gone." "What did you want with her?" "I want to talk to her." "I'm sorry, but she doesn't want to talk to you." "How do you know?" "That's what she said." "How does she know until she hears what I have to say?" "I don't know, but that's exactly what she said." "Easy, I want to see her!" "Why?" "Because." "You'll have to give me a better reason than that." "Well, I..." "What?" "Go ahead." "I'm in love with her." "After all she's done to you?" "Yes." "And don't ask me why." "Well, I don't know what to do." "I'll come back." "Oh, no, no, stay here." "What do you mean, you don't know what to do?" "Well, you see, Abby made me promise not to tell anyone where she has gone to." "And I just can't break that promise." "That's silly." "Now, come on, tell me." "Where is she?" "Well, I'll do what I can." "You know I can't speak German." "Roger, I am sorry, but I..." "White man want translation?" "Here it comes." "How much?" "Well, in the mood you're in, it would be pretty easy to put the bite on you." "But I don't want anybody to think I'm mercenary." "Five okay?" "Go ahead." "The fräulein said that Miss Page... is camping by the waterfall at the east end of the lake." "How do you know German?" "I don't." "I just took her there." "Well, you can take me too." "One other item." "I know." "I'll give you ten dollars more if you hurry." "That's the item." "Meet me at the dock." "You better be quiet." "She's camped right there behind those trees." "See where the light is?" "Yeah, I see it." "You want me to wait for you?" "No." "There's no way to get back." "There's no bridge." "That's all right." "Want me to pick you up like tomorrow morning?" "Be just a slight charge." "I'll send up a smoke signal." "Keep some wood dry." "Looks like there's a storm comin' up." "One other thing before you go." "What'll it cost me?" "This one's on the house." "It's free." "Just remember, a squaw never knows what she wants until you tell her." "Is that from Confucius too?" "No, that's from me." "Confucius didn't get around as much as I do." "Be careful getting out." "Yeah." "Will you give me a shove off?" "Happy hunting." "Roger, what are you doing here?" "I just wanted to..." "I don't want to talk to you." "I don't want to see you." "I want to be by myself." "So if you'll please go and get in your boat and go home." "Roger, I thought I told you to go away." " I can't." " Why?" "I must've left the boat untied." "It's gone." "Well, that's just like you." "And I can't swim either." "Remember?" "I suppose you'll just have to stay then." "But just don't talk to me." "All right." "I won't." "You don't mind if I sit down, do you?" "I don't really care what you do." "But just don't talk to me." "Just wait 'til I get a hold of Easy!" "I told her I didn't want to see you." "I told her I didn't want to see anybody." "Don't talk to me." "That was an owl." "Roger?" "Did you tell the tournament committee that you're a fake?" "Yes, I did." "Did you get fired?" "Yes, I did." "And I talked to Tex." "We're finished." "For good." "Then it was all my fault." "Look, why don't you just go away, somewhere, so I don't have to see you." "What are you doing?" "Getting in out of the rain." "Well, you just get right out of here." "I will not." "This is my sleeping bag." "You think I want to be in here?" "Oh, you mean you don't?" "No." "I'm just not gonna stay out there and get wet." "Well, all right." "Then just don't talk to me." "What is it that you're doing?" "You're too far over." "I'm what?" "Move over here." "I will not." "I'm trying to get this zipper shut." "I can't do it if you keep pulling the cover." "Oh." "Is that all right?" "Thank you." "Roger..." "If I have to stop talking, why don't you stop?" "All right." "I certainly will." "I can't see why Cadwalader would fire Willoughby." "It isn't clear to me either." "What will I do without him?" "You're gonna lose more money to me, that's what." "I don't care if he is a fraud." "He still knows more about fishing than any man alive." "Willoughby's no fraud." "He's an honest man." "Yeah, he just proved that." "Yeah, he did." "What difference does it make if he can't fish?" "It's whether I can fish that's important." "I don't want to lose him!" "I agree with you, but Suffering Sam over there will never change his mind." "Look at him.!" "Bleeding from a mortal wound.!" "Probably thinking about the thousands of people that'll read about it." "It's bound to hit the papers." "Yeah, that's..." "Thousands of people." "Skaggs, you old goat, that's it." "What's it?" "What'd I say?" "What you just said." "You gave me the inspiration of my life." "Come on." "Cadwalader, I want to talk to you." "Huh?" "I said I wanted to talk to you." "What about?" "Well, I, uh..." "First, do something with that thatched roof of yours." "Oh, I'm sorry." "Cadwalader, you're an ass." "An utter ass." "I beg your pardon." "Why?" "Why?" "For firing Willoughby." "Oh, he can't fish." "Can't fish?" "That's exactly what I want to talk about." "I don't follow you at all." "Because this was a tournament, he disqualified himself." "But the fact remains, he caught the winning fish." "Doesn't that mean anything to you?" "I'm afraid it doesn't." "Oh, you mutton-head!" "It means that any darn fool... can catch a record fish if he's using the right equipment." "Thousands of people all over the country will read about it." "Yes, isn't it horrible." "Horrible, nothing!" "I know these amateur fishermen." "Roger Willoughby will be an inspiration." "Every man jack will say, "If Willoughby can do it, just give me the right rod, reel and lure, and so can I."" "A million dollars of free publicity, and you fired him." "You ought to be ashamed." "Oh, my goodness!" "I never thought of that!" "You want me to set him up... in business in competition to you?" "No, no, no, no, no!" "If you don't, somebody else will." "You better hire him back before he gets away." "And fix that roof of yours." "I must hurry." "I've got to find him." "Thank you, gentlemen." "Thank you very much." "Oh, Willoughby!" "Willoughby!" "Oh, Willoughby.!" "What do you want?" "Hold it." "I think I hear them." "What is it?" "Wh-What is it?" "Sounds like Cadwalader." "Oh, look out, Abigail!" "What?" "What's the matter?" "Don't move!" "Why..." "What..." "Where are we?" "We're out in the middle of the lake!" "What are we doing here?" "Hold still!" "Willoughby!" "Can you hear me, Willoughby?" "Yes, I hear you." "I made a mistake." "We need you back, Willoughby!" "Hey, Roger!" "You got your job back, I think." "Please, Willoughby." "Lie still!" "Look!" "We're gonna tip over!" "We'll give you a raise, Willoughby." "How much will you give him?" "I'll talk to you later." "Will you come back?" "Yes, Mr. Cadwalader!" "Oh, that's fine, Willoughby." "Do you want us to send you any help?" "Never mind, Mr. Cadwalader!" "Do you think he's in trouble?" "Yes, but it's too late to help him." "Listen!" "Hmm?" "Do you think you could like me the way you did that night?" "What night?" "You know, when you kissed me." "You said that kiss was no good." "Oh, I'm sorry I said that, Roger." "I prefer to forget that night ever happened." "Oh, Roger, I was Iying when I said the kiss wasn't any good." "You were..." "Sure!" "Honest, I was!" "I was just pretending." "Do you think that you could find me... strangely attractive again?" "Hmm?" "Well, I don't know." "L..." "Mm-mm." "Maybe if you kissed me, just a little." "Hmm?" "If you didn't like it, you could stop." "Maybe you would like it, but then again if you didn't..." "Sometimes when people..." "Mm-hmm." "Will you shut up?" "Oh, John, you shouldn't have done that." "Why, Marcia?" "Because this picture's over." "This is the end." "*Some men are good at hunting quail *" "*Some like to sail *" "* While others like to box *" "*Some men prefer to surf*" "* While others like the turf*" "*And lose a lot of money on thejocks *" "*Some men sayjudo is their dish *" "* While others fish *" "* Where mountain waters swirl *" "*But let a girl appear *" "*He'll pursue her *" "*And run his fingers through her curls *" "*And that's the way it's been *" "*Since the world began *" "* The favorite sport of man *" "*Is girls *" "*Some men put on an aqualung *" "*And swim among *" "* The barnacles and pearls *" "*But let a doll appear *" "*He'll pursue her *" "*And run his fingers through her curls *" "*And that's the way it's been *" "*Since the world began *" "* The favorite sport of man *" "*Is girls **" "Sorry." "I wasn't looking." "Hey, you can go now!" "I beg your pardon." "Well, hi." "Um, I-I was going to park here." " How can you?" "I'm already here." " I can see that." "But you'll have to move." "This is my place." "How could it be your place when I'm already in it?" "I park here every day." " Hey, buddy, this your car?" " Yes, officer, it is." " Can't leave it here." " Uh, I'll move it in a minute." " If you don't, you'll find a ticket on it." " Right away, officer." "Now, look, young lady..." "You'd better move your car." "I think he meant what he said." "See that number?" "Of course I see that number." "It's 19." " Well, I'm 19." " You look older to me, but you never can tell." "Oh, we're not talking about my age." "I know, but we've already discussed the parking." "I shouldn't be in a spot like this." "I don't think so either." "Couldn't you find a better place to propose to her?" "Step on it." "It's after 9:00." "I'm not proposing!" "Are we late?" "Not if we hurry." "Better luck next time." "You can't leave your car here!" "I already have, but if you want to move it, go on ahead." " I don't want to move your car!" " Good." "Then just leave it right where it is." "She's not gonna get away with this." "I'll fix her." "Hi, officer." "Find what you're looking for?" "I wasn't looking for anything." "You weren't?" "Just trying to start this car." "Interesting way of doing it." "You mind telling me why?" "So I could move it." " This isn't your car?" " No, it belongs to the girl that just left." " But she's a friend of yours." " I never saw her before." "This is getting more interesting by the minute." "Better let me see your license." "I, uh, must have dropped it or something." "Here it is." "Well, well, well." "Would you mind hurrying?" "I'm late enough as it is." "Simmer down, Abigail." ""Abigail"?" "That's what it says right here." "Let me see that." "This isn't mine!" "You don't know how happy I am to hear that." "Here it is." "Roger Willoughby, hmm?" "Yeah." "You say you don't even know this Abigail Page." "No, I don't!" "Officer, look, this is all very simple." "The young lady parked in my parking space." "I work here..." "Abercrombie and Fitch." "I tried to explain to her, but the whole thing got confused." "You said it was simple." "It should've been, but you know women." "She's the kind that gets you confused." "I meet 'em every day." "She said she was in a hurry." "Then they both started talking. "They"?" "By that time there were two of them." "Two?" "You were in a spot." "Yeah." "She said I could move the car if I wanted to, but she left both doors locked." "Screwy story." "You think I made it up?" "No, no." "It's too real for that." "I got no reason, but I believe you." "Well, if I could just have my driver's license." "Well, I'll need it for another minute." "What for?" "I can't give you a ticket without a license." "A ticket for what?" "For leaving that car over there." "That's the one you should have moved." "Oh, Roger." "There are some customers waiting for you." "I got held up." "Who's first?" "Major Phipps." "He's been in rod and reels since the store opened, and you know the major." "Mr. Willoughby, I wanted to ask you about the best way to catch northern pike." "Well, sir." "Uh, Joe." "I'll be with you in a minute." "Meanwhile, letJoe show you the new nylon lines that came in yesterday." "They'll be well worth your while." "Good morning, Major Phipps." "Fourteen minutes and thirty seconds." "I beg your pardon?" "That's how long I've been waiting for you." "I'm terribly sorry." "I had a little problem in the parking lot." "Let's stop wasting time." "I can get out of a couple of board meetings next week... and make the tournament at..." "Lake Wakapoogee?" "Splendid, splendid." "What can I help you with?" "Rods, reels, lines, lures, spinners, flies, bugs, spoons... the whole mess!" "I see." "Well, then, let's, uh..." "Let's start with the rods." "Cornerstone of the outfit, you know." "Let's see here." "Gonna win this year, Major?" "I intend to keep on trying." "Good." "Oh, here we are." "This is the one I would recommend." "Good morning, Tom!" "It's light, flexible, strong, perfectly balanced." "How does it feel?" "Light." "Would you like to try to make a cast?" "Yes, I think I would." "Mmm." "Oh!" "Look at that." "L" " I-It's my arm." "Machine gun bullets during the war." "I can't get movement..." "I'm ashamed of you." "Why?" "Haven't you read my book?" "Of course I have." "Every word of it." "It says here on page 21, I think..." "Yes. "You need very little movement... to make a good cast with a spinning reel." I must've missed that." "Tom, show the major a couple of casts... and I'll explain it to him as you go." "Now remember, Major, 10:00 position first, 10:00 position first." "Then 11:00, 11:00." "Higher." "Then forward to 9:00." "Try it, Tom. 9:00." "You see?" "Isn't that pretty?" "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Try it again." "See?" "Very little wrist movement." "Would you like to try it, Major?" "I certainly would." "Now remember, gently." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Gently. 10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Hey!" "Look at that!" "Good!" "Good!" "Roger, what would I do without you?" "I wish you were going to stay at the lake during the tournament." "Why haven't you ever entered the tournament?" "I don't seem to have enough time." "Well, you should." "It's a rod, all right." "What kind of fish should I go after?" "Bass, trout, blue gills?" "Let's see..." "Last year the Wakapoogee was won with a bass." "Six pounds, eight ounces, I believe." "I know!" "I saw that old goat Harvey Skaggs land the fish!" "He used a plug, a green Plunking Dingbat." "That's not what I asked you!" "This isn't last year!" "I want to know what to use this year!" "Let's see, Major." "Roger!" "Phone." "Yeah?" "Oh." "Excuse me, Major." "I'll be right back." " Good morning." "Willoughby speaking." " Roger, this is Jim Stern." " Yeah, Jim?" " Listen, I'm up here at Lake Wakapoogee... and I got the doggonedest string of fish you've ever seen." "Well, good for you." "Um..." "Jim, what kind of fish did you go after?" " Trout, like you suggested." " And what would you say is the best time of day?" "Between 10:00 and 11:00 in the morning. 10:00 and 11:00 in the morning." "Uh-huh." "What was the water temperature?" "68 degrees." "68 degrees." "And how deep did you go?" "Just below the surface." "I started with a Colorado Spinner..." " and ended with a Super-Duper." " I see." "Well, thank you, Jim." "I appreciate your calling." "Bye." "Now then, what were we talking about?" "What kind of fish I should go after." "I suggest trout." "Trout." "Mm-hmm." "About 10:00 or 11:00 in the morning, the water should be around 68 degrees." "68 degrees." "What kind of a lure, and how deep?" "Just under the surface, and use either a Colorado Spinner... or a Super-Duper." "Amazing." "A Colorado Spinner or a Super-Duper." "Good morning, Maggie." "Good morning, Roger." "Go right on in." "Oh, thank you." "Well, hi." "Hello." "Good morning, sir." "Willoughby!" "Come in, come in." "Miss Perkins, send in the young ladies, please." "Yes, sir." "Fine morning, isn't it?" "I want you to..." "Ah, here they are now." "Miss Page and Miss Mueller." " Mr. Roger Willoughby." " Yep." "I knew it." " We've met." " Yes, in the parking lot." "Oh, fine." "Please sit down and we'll get on with this." "Thank you." "Miss Mueller is the daughter of Mr. Mueller, who owns the lodge at Lake Wakapoogee." "And Miss Page is director of public relations for the lodge." "I see." "Willoughby, this is your lucky day." " It is?" " Absolutely." "You are entering the fishing tournament at Lake Wakapoogee." "Sir?" "Stuns you, doesn't it?" "You want m-me to fish in the tournament?" "That's right." "As the official representative of Abercrombie and Fitch." "M" " Mr. Cadwalader..." "Don't thank me, thank Miss Page." "It was all her idea." "You know, the more I think of it, the more excited I become." "Your reputation will have considerable influence on the publicity for the tournament," " which will benefit the lodge..." " Beaver." "Oh." "Thank you." "And will benefit us, of course." "I tell you, Willoughby..." "What's the matter?" "Is something bothering you?" "Mr. Cadwalader, it's just that I don't..." "Just what?" "I don't think I should enter the fishing tournament." "Why not?" "Give us one good reason." "Well, because I..." "Well, that's certainly no reason." "I didn't give a reason." "Why?" "Come on." "We're waiting." "Now, now, just a minute." "I think I know what's bothering Willoughby." "You don't think it's fair for the teacher to compete with the pupils." "Exactly!" " They might resent me, and that would defeat your purpose." " Oh, horsefeathers!" "Oh, my goodness!" "Oh, Abby!" "Let me have your handkerchief." "Oh, it's perfectly all right." "Don't worry a bit." "It..." "Forgive us, please." " It'll dry out." "It'll dry out right away." " Well, good." "Silly, isn't it?" "My wife makes me wear it." "I see." "Let's get on with it, shall we?" "Yes, sir." "Yes, Mr. Cadwalader." "Let me see." "Where were we?" "Mr. Willoughby said the other fishermen might resent his entering the tournament, and then I hit the ashtray." "That's exactly what I said." "I don't agree." "They would be flattered." "Oh, they would not!" "It would be like playing on the same team with Mickey Mantle." "It's not the same!" "It's exactly... the same." "Good thing you didn't hit the ashtray." "Stop being so modest." "I'm not being modest!" "They're right, Willoughby.!" "It's just your modesty talking." "I don't want to hear anymore." "Yes, Miss Perkins." "It's 11:30, Mr. Cadwalader." "Thanks, Perkins." "I have a luncheon appointment." "I'll be tied up this afternoon." "Willoughby, why don't you take the young ladies to lunch and explain the details to them." "Uh..." "Miss Page, it was a great idea of yours." "Mr. Cadwalader, didn't you forget something?" "Hmm?" "Your little thingamajig." "Oh." "No, I didn't forget it." "Good excuse not to wear it." "Miss Mueller, thank you very much." "It was a pleasure." "Oh, by the way, Willoughby." "Yes?" "How is your fishing gear?" "Well, sir, with so little chance, I..." "Just as I thought." "We'll get together in the morning and pick out all the equipment you'll need." "Yes." "Good-bye." "Now, look, Miss Page..." "Please." "Please, I-I didn't realize that I had taken your parking space." "I didn't know that you were Roger Willoughby." "I thought some nut pulled up..." "Abby." "Well, I'm sorry." "So, please forgive me." "Please?" "Oh, well, I..." "Please?" "I can't really blame you, Miss Page." "But I wanted to talk to you..." "You couldn't move my car because I locked the doors." "That's not what I wanted to talk to you about." "You'd have had a hard time getting into that car." "That's possible." "The funny thing is, he almost got a ticket." "I got a ticket!" "What, from the policeman?" "That's right." "Oh, no." "Well, I told you you'd better do what he said, didn't I?" "Don't you remember?" "I remember distinctly." "Don't get mad." "You have the faculty..." "Don't forget you have to work together." "That's what I want to talk about!" "I want to get one thing straight." "Do you feel that you are too good to enter our fishing tournament?" "No, I don't!" "Ah, that's what I wanna hear!" "Let's have some lunch." "Miss Page..." "Don't hold a grudge." "I'll make you a deal." "Buy us two martinis, I'll pay for your ticket." "Okay?" "Oh, hell." "Mr. Willoughby, I should have thought that you'd jump at the chance... to go fishing." "Well, ordinarily, I..." "Is it your wife?" "Doesn't she want you to go?" "I don't have a wife." "Then your fiancée?" "Your girlfriend?" "The girl I'm engaged to has nothing to do... with my not wanting to enter the tournament." "At least we know you're engaged... and that you don't want to enter the tournament." "That's right." "I guess we'll just keep wondering why." "I have no intention of discussing the reasons with you." "Uh-huh." "Step right in, please." "You'd better keep on trying." "I will!" "Well, hurry up." "Mr. Willou..." "Oh, no." "What?" "Well, I was just thinking." "If you're up at the lake, you'll be away from the store." "Yes, that's right." "Well, you don't want to risk that, do you?" "Why?" "It's only a job." "I mean, you're afraid of the auditors." "The auditors may come in, go over your books... and find out that you've been playing hanky-panky with the store funds." "What?" "Listen, Roger, how much are you short?" "I'm not short anything!" "Shh." "Shh." "I don't have anything to do with the money in the store!" "She's just talking nonsense!" "How can you say such a thing with those people hearing you?" "They have three seats!" "They might believe you!" "Well, I just didn't think." "You know, I really can't figure you out, Miss Page." "Either you don't know what you're doing, or you just don't care." "Miss Page is so formal, Roger." "Call me Abigail." "I don't want to know you that well." "Even as a total stranger, you're too much trouble." "What'll it be, folks?" "Martini." "Martini." "Make mine a double!" "A thing like that could ruin a man's reputation!" "Do you have a light?" "You can't really believe I'm committing larceny, but you made those people think so." "Before I met you, my life was uncomplicated, peaceful." "Everything was fine." "Didn't have any trouble." "L..." "Even with this lighter I didn't have any trouble." "Are you always in the habit of ruining men's lives?" "Not really." "I just try to do my share." "Who are you?" "I'm confused." "Who is he?" "I don't know, but he's sure got a new approach." "Hi." "We thought we lost you." "That was a pretty girl." "Who is she?" "I don't know." "There you are." "Aren't you going to sit down, Roger?" "I'd rather walk." "Come on." "Don't get mad." "Sit down." "Come." "I'll have another." "Yes, sir." "We were talking, and we couldn't remember... a tournament that you'd ever entered." "Miss Page..." "Abigail." "Miss Page," "I don't compete with other fishermen because I..." "Forget it." "Can't you speak English?" "I'm confused enough." "Here you are, sir." "Roger, please, don't." "What?" "Don't what?" "What?" "Don't take it." "Don't take another drink." "I mean, it must be terrible having a drinking problem." "What?" "We should've known that liquor was your failing." "Now, just a minute, I..." "It's that you're afraid when you go away from home, you can't trust yourself." "That's why you never enter into competition." "You ready for another?" "No!" "Oh, go ahead, Roger." "Don't torture yourself." "I'm not torturing myself!" "I don't compete with other fishermen... for a very simple reason." "What is it?" "If I tell you, do you promise never to breathe a word of it?" "Certainly." "I don't..." "Uh, that'll be $5.40, please." "Let's get out of here." "Where are we going?" "Someplace where no one will hear what I have to say." "Roger, what on earth..." "Never mind!" "Come on!" "Roger, what..." "Would you please explain..." "Have any nickels or dimes?" "Yes." "Get 'em out, will ya?" "Okay, get the nickels." "He's crazy!" "What?" "He's crazy!" "You're right!" "If I tell you, do you promise never to tell anybody?" "Do you?" "All right." "I cannot fish in your tournament... because I've never been fishing in my life!" "What?" "You've never been fishing in your whole..." "No, no, no, no!" "Shh!" "You promised to be quiet." "Oh." "Okay." "Rog..." "Remember." "Did I hear you right?" "I said I've never been fishing in my entire life!" "That's because you're a phony!" "I am not!" "Of course you're a phony!" "Come on." "Don't run off, folks." "The lights'll be on in a minute." "Coming to this place wasn't such a good idea." "Anyway, now you know." "You've never really been fishing?" "Never." "No wonder you don't want to enter the tournament." "It was your idea, Abigail." "I'm sorry." "I was thinking." "You'd better decide what to do." "I may shoot him or myself." "I suggest the latter." "You'd better figure it out." "I have things to do." "Taxi!" "Good-bye." "Don't worry." "I'll keep your secret." "Now that you know I no longer can help you, you'd better tell Mr. Cadwalader you've changed your mind." "Have I?" "Have I changed my mind?" "Hmm?" "Now just a minute..." "If you'll buy me some lunch, we'll discuss the whole thing." "Come on." "I know a nice little place." "You know, you don't look like a phony, Roger." "How did it all start?" "I got a job..." "Mm-hmm." "Selling fishing tackle in a little place." "I listened to my customers." "Fishermen love to talk." "What one customer would tell me, I'd tell the next one." "Then I got a job at Abercrombie and Fitch and read up on fishing." "Why didn't you just fish?" "Because I happen to hate fish..." "To handle them, to smell them." "Oh, no!" "And I brought you to this fish place." "I don't even like them on a plate." "Order ham and eggs." "Yecch." "Listen, it still seems dishonest to me." "Does a man who sells canaries have to learn to fly?" "People ask questions." "I give them answers." "I never claimed to be a fisherman." "You never unclaimed it." "It never seemed important until now." "I'm glad I didn't pay $1.50 for your book." "$2.00!" "$1.50's too much." "Four of my people have won cups." "You'd better start studying it." "Why?" "Because you wanna enter our tournament!" "I have no intention of fishing in your... tournament." "Shh!" "Shh." "Roger, it's up to you." "But you'd look pretty silly if the truth came out." "I'd look like a..." "A phony." "I don't like that word." "But it's true, isn't it?" "No, it isn't." "If the customers learn the truth, I'd lose 'em." "I'd lose my job." "Cadwalader would have me thrown out." "And if I entered your tournament, they'd know." "Maybe." "But they'd be sure to know if..." "You didn't." "Do you mean..." "I'd tell 'em." "I believe you would." "You know I would!" "You don't have to win the tournament." "You just have to make a reasonably good showing." "How?" "You tell me how." "Millions of people know how to fish." "I figure that you could learn, with the right incentive." "Like keeping your job." "Did you take a special course in blackmail, or is it a natural talent?" "It won't do us any good to be bitter, Roger." "I know that you're a phony, and you know that you are." "The tournament begins on Friday, and today's Monday." "If you can be up there with your equipment tomorrow, then we'll have almost three days to teach you." "Who's "we"?" "Easy and I. We're both good." "You don't have anything to worry about..." "Well, maybe one thing." "What?" "The girl that you're engaged to..." "Did you tell her that you don't know how to fish?" "It never came up." "Don't you think you'd feel better if you told her?" "I'll decide what to tell her." "It's risky." "She may throw you out." "Is she rich?" "Miss Page, I don't think that..." "Well, anyway, it's up to you." "Bring your book." "You might learn something from it." "Wh-What about lunch?" "Oh, I never eat lunch." "Bye!" "Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Satur..." "Six days." "I'm liable to kill her." "I'll be with you in just a minute, mister." "White man have long journey?" "Oh, just from San Francisco." "Heap big place." "Many moon ago I take trail to Frisco." "What tribe are you from?" "Me chief Wakapoogee tribe." "My name John Screaming Eagle." "My people own this lake before white man come." "Is that so?" "Sorry to keep you waiting." "Have you a reservation?" "I believe so." "My name is Roger Willoughby." "Oh, of course." "Your name Willoughby?" "Mm-hmm." "My great-grandfather, Roaring Buffalo, once scalped man named Willoughby." "Please, you not be angry." "Oh, I..." "I glad you no angry." "You ever fish Wakapoogee before?" "No." "You, uh, want win tournament?" "Yes." "See this?" "Genuine Screaming Eagle bass plug." "Only six dollar." "This is a cheap imitation of the Chugger Spook." " It's made in Japan and sells for 68 cents." " John, you picked the wrong man." "This is Roger Willoughby, the famous fisherman." "Miss Page has a reservation for you at the lodge, cabin five." "Oh, I don't want a cabin." "I'd like a campsite." "Let me see what I have." "You'd be more comfortable in a cabin." "Oh, no, I..." "They're newly redecorated... air-conditioning, TV," "Gideon Bible, the whole works." "Red man speak with strange tongue." "I just talk that way for the tourists." "Take the cabin." "Oh, no, I, I, uh..." "Why not?" "Well, because my boss wants me to camp." "Well, in the words of our great chief Confucius," ""Man is much better off if he obeys the voice that feeds him."" "Confucius." "I thought he was Chinese." "Chinese-Indian." "I can let you have campsite C-11." "Nice place by the lake." "You'll be happy there." "How do I get there?" "Just follow the road." "Campsites are well marked." "You can't miss it." "When do you expect the rest of your party, Mr. Willoughby?" "I'm alone." "All this equipment, just for you?" "That's right." "How long do you intend to stay?" "Six days." "Six days?" "It'll take him that long to unpack." "Miss Page!" "Miss Page!" " Yeah?" " I have a message for you." "Roger Willoughby isn't coming to the lodge!" "He's at campsite C-11.!" "Thank you!" "What would he be doing there?" "We'd better go see." "We can go by water." "It's faster." "Okay." "Why should this be happening to me?" "Holy smoke." "Look at that camp." ""Step six:" ""Grasp tent at point X and Y," ""except for model 42-B." ""See illustration 13 for further information." "Model 42-B discontinued."" "This must go somewhere inside." "Hi!" "Hi." "Where did you come from?" "Down at the lake." "What are you doing?" "I am setting up a tent!" "Ohh.!" "Are you?" " After which I shall try making a bed." " Can we help?" "Yes." "Go away." "Oh, good.!" "Uh, listen, I'm curious..." "What is all this about?" "This is Mr. Cadwalader's idea of what a well-equipped camper should have." "Well, why are you camping?" "Again, Mr. Cadwalader's idea." "He seemed to be almost inspired, since he met you." "Oh, well, now, don't be angry, Roger." "It wasn't my idea." "Miss Page, Mm-hmm?" "I had time to think while driving up here." "I don't think you can ever get me angry again." "Great." "I'm glad you've come to your senses." "Because this isn't going to work." "Of course it isn't." "What isn't?" "Your camping." "You've never been camping before, have you?" "I'm doing a lot of things I've never done before." "Yes." "Are you supposed to be out of the water with those things on?" "We're not supposed to take them off before we get out of the water." "You don't have time to learn camping." "You'll have enough trouble learning to fish." "After the tournament you can learn how to make your bed." "Mr. Cadwalader tol..." "Phooey on Mr. Cadwalader." "Then what do I tell him?" "What'll you tell him when he sees you camping?" "He isn't going to see me." "Oh, yes, he is." "He phoned for a reservation." "See, smarty?" "He'll be up here tomorrow." "He will?" "Listen, Roger, there's only one thing for you to do." "What?" "Move back to the lodge." "But before he comes." "Then what do I tell him?" "Say that you..." "What?" "I'll think of something." "Yeah." "Oh, sure." "Roger, if anybody sees you here camping..." "They'll know you've never been out of a hothouse before." "We'll help you get all of your stuff packed." "All right, John Screaming Eagle." "Come here." "How long have you been, uh, standing over there?" "There?" "Mm-hmm." "Long enough to know he never been out of hothouse before." "Only for tourists, huh?" "Will, uh, ten dollars make you forget it?" "For twenty, Screaming Eagle was never there." "Five." "She say ten." "Five." "And you can help pack up this stuff." "As the great chief Confucius say..." "Five birds in hand worth 20 who fly away." "You know him better than I did." "Willoughby, did you see this?" "Yes, Major." "I didn't know you entered the tournament." "It was a sudden decision." "You might've warned your customers." "It's going to make the competition stiff for us." "So that's the way you feel." "And you won last year, Mr. Skaggs." "I beat Phipps hands down." "I figured I could do it again." "You just got lucky." "I can still do it." "You're still lucky." "With you in it, it's different." "Then the only sporting thing would be for me to withdraw." "Oh, no..." "What?" "Now, Roger, you see..." "They consider it unfair competition." "I don't care what..." "I feel that I should..." "Hold it, Willoughby!" "Withdraw nothing!" "I've got my 10:00, 11:00, 9:00..." "I've got it down pat, and I'm going after you!" "If Skaggs is afraid to, let's let him withdraw." "Who said I was?" "I'm glad he's here." "You are?" "If I lose to you, I'm losing to a master and I don't mind." "But if I should beat you, that'd be much more glory than beating Phipps." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "Oh, stop it." "Just like I said, like playing on the same team with Mickey Mantle, right?" "Listen, gentlemen, if you'll excuse us, we have a little business to talk over." "What?" "Come on, Roger." "Excuse us." "Good night." "You two go ahead." "Yeah." "Come on, Roger." "What for?" "We're gonna buy you dinner." "Is that what she said?" "There." "Now, isn't that nice?" "Just for the three of us." "Very nice." "Glad you like it." "Come on, Roger, sit down." "Come on." "I shouldn't be so nice to you after that sneaky trick you tried to pull out there." "Why don't you just make up your mind that you're stuck?" "Make the best of it." "You and I are going to work together quite a bit of the time." "Why must we be together?" "I have to teach you how to fish." "You don't want to do it on your own, do you?" "No." "Well, then, we have to be together." "We don't want anybody to find out about it." "Oh, say, did you tell your girlfriend, Miss, uh, Connors, that you can't fish?" "I told you that was none..." "But she made a reservation." "I know." "I forgot to tell you." "She's coming up Friday." "I know that too." "Would you like a roll?" "No, thank you." "I'll give you one anyway." "I just don't want to make any trouble for you by saying the wrong thing to her." "I guess you didn't tell her or you'd say so." "No, I didn't tell her." "Is that all right with you?" "Sure, sure, sure." "Hi." "Dinner is ready." "How are you doing?" "Just fine." "Making Roger mad again." "You'd better figure out where you're going to take him tomorrow for his lesson." "Yes." "A quiet place where murder wouldn't be noticed." "Oh, don't be silly." "That's a good idea!" "I know." "No, no, there is a cove at the north end." "Nobody would see you, but you'd better not go together." "I'll take the boat up about 8:00, and you meet me at the north trail." "Where's that?" "You start at the ranger station and go to the end." "But it's too narrow for a car." "Take that little red thing you had at the camp." "The trail bike." "That'd be just perfect, wouldn't it?" "Uh, can you ride it?" "It just so happens that I can." "Well, you're just full of surprises, aren't you?" "Oh..." "Uh..." "Mmm..." "Roger." "What's the matter?" "Never mind." "It's too late." "What do you mean?" "It's just too late." "What are you talking about?" "Does your salad taste good?" "Mm-hmm." "Well, that's good." "It tasted very good." "Why?" "Well, because..." "Nothing." "L..." "I can't tell you." "What are you laughing at?" "Do you really want to know?" "Yes, I want to know what I'm laughing about." "Well, you know, just before you took that first bite, Yeah, go on." "A caterpillar fell out of the tree, right onto your plate." "It was a fuzzy one." "He was crawling around on the plate for a while." "Listen, cheer up." "Have some wine." "Hi there." "Have you a motorcycle just went up the road?" "Yes, I did." "Did it take you long to teach the bear how to ride it?" "It just took a minute." "Well, fell off right around the turn." "Thank you very much." "That's all right." "So long." "Hey, Roger." "I'm sorry I'm late." "Good morning." "Good morning." "Hey, it looks like we're going to get to use all this part of the lake." "What on earth are you wearing?" "They're inflatable waders." "They're what?" "Inflatable waders." "They have a built-in life preserver." "Pull this cord, and the gas bottle inflates the thing, and you don't sink." "Do they work?" "I don't know." "I'm testing them for the store." "You don't need waders to get into the boat." "I do too." "I can't swim." "Oh, no." "You can't run a boat either?" "I've never felt the need." "The need's caught up with you." "Come on." "Get in." "It won't tip." "Huh?" "Uh-uh." "Just relax." "Nothing's going to happen." "Let me outta here." "Get back in there." "Sit in that third seat." "That's a boy." "Go all the way back." "Even if I don't want to?" "Okay, now, stay right there." "You be careful." "The first thing you have to learn is to start the motor." "I thought you were gonna teach me how to fish." "Sometimes it's necessary to run the boat out where the fish are." "All right." "It's as easy as starting a lawn mower." "First take ahold of the starter-rope handle." "Where's that?" "That thing." "This?" "Yank that back hard as you can." "But before you do that..." "Roger!" "Roger, pull the cord on that thing!" "Roger?" "Roger, are you okay?" "Are you all right?" "Bring that boat over!" " Oh!" " You're getting too much air!" "Turn it off!" " O-Oh!" " Turn it off!" "Hold your breath.!" "You gotta let the air out!" "Help me!" "Hold your breath." "Be just a minute." "Abigail!" "There we are." "Bring yourself up!" "Abby!" "Please!" "Abby!" "Please.!" "Roger, hold your breath!" "Abigail, stop!" "Stop, stop!" "Hang on, now." "Isn't that fun, Roger?" "Hang on, Roger." "Here, drink some of this." "This'll warm you up." "Abby." "Hmm?" "Let me see the soles of your shoes." "Why?" "Mm-hmm, that's it." "What?" "I saw the same marks on my back when I was changing my clothes." "Yeah." "I was jumpin' up and down on ya." "Why?" "Because that's the only way I could get the water outta ya." "Just gallons and gallons..." "Excuse me." "Hello?" "Mm-hmm, just a minute." "Mr. Willoughby, please." "It's for you." "Who is it?" "Cadwalader." "Hello." "I just checked in." "What are you doing in your cabin?" "The reason I'm not camping is..." "Miss Page explained all that to me." "Why aren't you at the lake?" "I've been at the lake." " Studied it thoroughly?" " Yes, sir, from top to bottom." "Excellent." "How about our equipment?" "You want some?" "Well, I tested the inflatable waders this morning." "How did they work?" "I couldn't recommend them to our customers." "Very well." "I'll make a note of that, Willoughby." "Just a minute, please." "I have to ring off now." "I have an appointment with a man." "Perhaps you know him." "John Screaming Eagle." "Who?" "He's the head of the Wakapoogee tribe." "He's got some valuable historical relics to show me." "I'll call you later on tonight." "How." "Good afternoon." "Come in." "Did you bring them?" "Shh." "Oh, this is very exciting." "Is this really General Custer's scalp?" "Great Grandfather Roaring Buffalo take in battle Little Big Horn." "Oh, then it must be real." "Screaming Eagle give white chief for present." "I couldn't accept it." "Old Indian custom." "I give you gift." "You give me gift." "Well, uh, what would you like?" "Twenty dollar." "Well, that's reasonable enough." "Hi." "Hi." "What have you been up to?" "I went over to see Roger for a minute." "He had dinner in his cabin." "And how is he?" "Oh, he's all right." "I offered to help him with the fire, but... he said that I'd helped him enough for one day." "He didn't want me to get all worn out." "He's just fine." "Oh, I got so scared today, Easy." "I almost let him drown!" "He can't swim and he got all full of water." "I had to drag him on the shore and sit down on him to pump him out." " And that's when I..." " When you what?" "Oh, huh..." "Gee, I did a silly thing." "I kissed him." "Why, I do not know." "And what did Roger do?" "He didn't kiss me back." "What did he do?" "Nothing." "Why?" "Because he was still unconscious." "You better try it again when he's conscious and find out what he does." "Oh, yeah?" "Okay." "Are you going out with him tomorrow?" "Well, 8:00 in the morning." "Only this time, no boats and no trick waders." "This is a nice place." "It'll be much better than fishing from a boat." "You can't fish from here." "You gotta wade into the lake." "Why?" "Because the fish aren't liable to come this close to shore." "Come on." "It's okay." "You remember, I can't swim." "Oh, Roger, the tournament starts tomorrow." "Come on." "Now, let's see." "Cast out there about 30 feet." "Yeah, but, uh..." "Just pretend you're Major Phipps." "Oh, yeah." "See..." "Okay?" "Yeah." "10:00." "Oh, yeah, 10:00." "Eleven, eleven." "Oh, yeah, eleven." "Uh-huh, and nine." "Ten..." "Yeah." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "That's very good, Roger!" "Oh!" "You hooked a fish!" "Oh!" "Watch him." "He's running." "Here, here." "No, Roger." "Stop him." "How do I do it?" "Blow a whistle?" "Set the drag." "Oh, uh..." "Okay, now reel him in." "Uh..." "Pull it up and reel him in." "Good." "Come on." "Even it off, Roger." "I am." "Please, a little faster." "But not so fast..." "You want it slow or you want it..." "You do it." "You take ahold of that thing and bring him in." "Just do it evenly." "That's good." "Come on." "That's good." "That's good." "Now, watch the fish, would you?" "Okay, pull up." "That's it." "Now reel him in." "Come on, Roger." "Easy, easy..." "There!" "Whoo!" "He's not very big." "He's a fish!" "Yeah, but..." "Take him off the hook." "I'm not gonna touch that thing." "You take it." "It won't bite you." "I can't stand the feel." "They're cold and they wiggle." "You have to take your own fish off the hook in the tournament." "Every fish I catch I have to take..." "Nobody else can." "Now, grab ahold of him and get the hook out." "That's good." "Here, hold it." "Yeah." "Now, stick your finger in there." "There." "That's good." "Hold onto him." "He's slippery." "Don't let go!" "Don't lose him!" "Oh!" "Got away." "Oh, I've got him!" "Yes!" "Yeah?" "Roger, help me!" "Not me, I..." "Oh!" "Ow!" "Roger, are you all right?" "Ooh!" "Hey, hey, I got it." "Here he is." "Huh?" "What's the matter?" "Oh!" "Abby, I got one!" "What're you..." "Oh!" "Oh!" "Oh!" "Don't come near me!" "Help me!" "Forget it!" "You didn't give me one single teeny bit of help." "Boy, you..." "Don't you dare throw him away." "Hang on to that fish." "I mean it." "Roger." "Yes." "How long do I have to hold this thing?" "Until I tell you you can put it down." "Hey, there's Easy." "Hi, Easy!" "Now it's going to rain." "I guess we can go in." "You are going to learn to fish." "You just sit there and hold that thing." "Hi, Easy." "Hi, everybody." "What's up?" "I brought you some..." "I brought you some rain, and I brought you some news." "What are you doing with that fish?" "Learning to hold on to it." "I don't understand." "Did he catch a fish?" "He caught two." "One." "The other one I caught is against all rules of fishing." "So he caught it in his pants!" "Oh, no!" "He can catch fish, but he can't stand to touch them." "I thought if he sat here holding one for a while, he'd get used to it." "Heh!" "I could hold this 'til it turns into a fossil and I still wouldn't get used to it." "You don't have to hold a thing anymore, and you don't have to worry." "Mr. Kilroy's coming." "The Chicago champ?" "That's right." "How do you know?" "The wire just came." "They had to call off the Oregon tournament..." "Bad storm." "He's driving up here this afternoon." "Hoo-hoo!" "Hallelujah!" "Roger, our problems are over." "Oh, yeah?" "Yes, we don't need you anymore." "We don't need you anymore." "You can get out of the tournament." "How?" "Walk up to Cadwalader... and say, "Look, Joe Kilroy's in town and, uh, I quit."" "Just that simple?" "No, you can't do it that way." "Lemme think." "Uh, you know the rain is making your shirt..." "I've got it!" "What?" "If you're not able to fish, you won't be able to enter the tournament, will you?" "I was saying that the..." "Did you hear me?" "I said, if you're not able to fish, you won't be able to enter the tournament, will you?" "You can break your leg!" "I'd rather fish." "Or an arm." "I'd rather fish!" "I'm tryin' to tell ya..." "I don't mean really break your arm, but... what happens when you break your arm?" "It snaps and it hurts." "What happens when you have to treat it?" "You put a cast on it." "You've got it!" "Anybody who sees a cast on somebody's arm assumes they've got a broken arm." "We know a little first aid." "We get some plaster of Paris, go into that woodshed and get all that stuff and put it on him." "Yeah." "Roger, are you paying any attention?" "Yes, I am." "Why aren't you looking at us, then?" "Because you look like you haven't any clothes on." "That's what I've been trying to tell you." "Come on." "Let's go." "Let's go change." "Then we'll meet in Roger's cabin." "Yeah." "Roger, are you gonna carry that thing with you?" "Well, too bad, because you were just learning to pick it up." "I'm really gonna kill her." "I'm really gonna do it." "Hey, Easy." "Look what I found." "Just exactly what we need." "They're perfect." "Please hold your arm out." "What're you gonna do?" "Hold still." "I wanna measure this." "What for?" "Well, because we can't let all that plaster stick to you." "Do you have a pair of scissors?" "I've got a knife." "Just as good." "Hey, stop that!" "Don't make so much trouble." "That's the only pair of long underwear I have." "They're still good." "They are, huh?" "One leg is a little shorter than the other, that's all." "Now take off your shirt." "What're you gonna do with my shirt?" "We can't put the cast on over your shirt." "Oh." "Easy, are you ready?" "Yes, I'm ready." "Here now." "Put this leg on." "And tell me, how do you want to wear your arm?" "What do you mean?" "In what position do you wanna hold your arm?" "In a sling, I guess." "Something like that?" "Okay, that's all right." "Now, hang on." "There." "Does that seem like the same position, the same angle?" "Mm, I think that's all right." "Hold it exactly like that." "I'll put this here so you don't get too dirty." "You start with the plaster." "I'll start with the bandage." "Okay." "Put your arm down." "Come on." "You just told me to keep it up." "We come back to that later." "Oh, boy!" "Hey, this stuff is gettin' all squishy." "This is all there is left." "Should I make some more?" "I think that's enough." "What am I supposed to do after I get this thing on?" "Weren't you even listening to us out there?" "I was a little bit distracted with the rain and everything." "I'm not quite sure I understand what I'm supposed to do." "Would you please tell him?" "After we're through, we'll explain... that you broke your arm." "How?" "You fell out of this tree." "That's the way my brother broke his arm." "What was I doing in the tree?" "Well..." "What was I doing?" "I know." "There was this little teeny bird that had fallen out of its nest, and you were taking it back to its mother." "And you're going to tell people that?" "Don't you think I should?" "Don't you think they'll cry?" "I'll think of something." "Don't worry." "I hope so." "Don't move." "I'll get it." "Wait, it might be Tex." "I wouldn't want her to find a strange woman in my cabin." "Oh, I can take care of that." "Big Chief Screaming Eagle here." "Who speak other end?" "Who is it?" "Harry?" "It's me." "It's the desk clerk." "What do you want?" "The ranger just called." "He said to tell you Mr. Kilroy was on his way to the lodge." "Oh, okay." "Thanks, Harry." "What is it?" "Mr. Kilroy just passed by the ranger station." "We have to get cleaned up before we meet him." "We better go!" "You're not gonna leave me like this?" "Don't worry." "We'll be back." "We have to wait 'til the cast hardens, anyway." "How long will that take?" "If you don't have a watch, let me set this thing for ten minutes." "When the bell goes off, your cast is done." "Stay there 'til the bell rings." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." "How did it happen there, Willoughby?" "Well, an itty-bitty bird fell on the ground... and I was taking it back to its mother." "Oh, no." "This is all wrong." "It oughta be like this." "It's all this up here." "Why'd they have to put it on my shoulder?" "You'd think they were plastering a house." "They've got to get me out of this." "Here comes your friend." "Evening, Major." "Evening." "First time I've been saluted in years." "That really felt good." "Nice boy." "Very thoughtful." "Yes, he is." "Ten-shun." "See that guy?" "Roger, thank goodness!" "I was looking for you." "I was looking for you." "Look at this arm." "Look how I have to hold it." "It just doesn't make any difference anymore." "It does to me." "No, it doesn't." "Come here and look through this window." "Why?" "You see that man with the cast on his arm?" "Yeah." "That is Joe Kilroy, our Chicago champion." "He had an automobile accident." "You can't both have broken arms." "His really is broken." "You mean I can't tell people about the itty-bitty bird?" "Right." "I could've thought of something better." "Come on." "We have to get that off your arm." "This saw ought to be just the thing!" "I don't think..." "Put your arm down." "He's right." "We couldn't tell where the cast stops and the arm begins." "I think you're right." "How about the snippers?" "Put your arm down." "I don't think..." "There's not enough room between the cast and the arm." "That doesn't work." "I'm gonna call a doctor." "Wait, hold still." "That's pretty hard." "A chisel and hammer ought to do it." "Put your arm right down there." "Come on." "Put your arm down." "Lean over this way." "Down flat so she can work on it." "Oh..." "Uh..." "Ooh!" "Ohh!" "That isn't going to work!" "I know!" "Put his arm over there in that vise." "I'm going to get a doctor." "You want that thing off or not?" "Well, yes, but..." "Then put your arm in here." "That's good." "Wind him up tight." "Okay." "This, this, this..." "I'll get it." "Here we are." " Oh, uh, uh..." " Hey, this is gonna work fine!" "You're not gonna use that thing on me!" "You said you wanted it off." "Not with that thing!" "It'll be all over in a moment." "That's what I'm afraid of!" "You'll never even know it happened." "O" " O-Oh, please, Abby!" "Shh!" "Roger." "Hello?" "Hello, Roger?" "I can't sleep." "Mm-hmm." "Who is this?" "This is Abigail." "I can't sleep." "Do you know what time it is?" "Just a minute." "I don't..." "I know what..." "Hello?" "Hello?" "I had to go in the other room to look at the clock." "It's 1:30." "I know it's 1:30." "You do?" "Well, why did you ask?" "Of course I do!" "I just wanted to see if you knew." " Yes, I just told you." "It's 1:30." " What is it that you want?" "You don't happen to have any sleeping pills on you, do you?" "Yes." "Oh, good." "I'll be right over." "Hey, wait a minute." "Say, uh, when will you be back?" "I don't know!" "Just a minute." "Hi." "Here's your sleeping pill." "This is better than a corner drugstore." "Thanks." "Uh, Roger, could I have a glass of water?" "I can't take these dry." "I suppose so." "I'm so glad that you hadn't gone to bed yet because I couldn't sleep, and I thought maybe..." "What are you doing?" "I'm taking my coat off." "Why?" "Because it's warm in here." "Anyway, I was thinking maybe you would be awake, thinking about tomorrow... and you might want to play a little gin rummy." "I do not want to play gin rummy." "My, but you're grumpy." "Is something bothering you?" "What would people think, you wandering over here, dressed like that?" "They might think I have funny-looking legs." "Yours are kind of funny looking too." "Here's your water." "Take your pill." "Mmm, thank you." "My, that's an ugly-looking pill." "I don't think I want it." "What?" "Didn't you just ask me..." "Well, I asked, all right." "But I changed my mind." "Don't you ever change your mind?" "Like sometimes you want somebody to do something," " then you find you don't want 'em to do it at all." " Like what, for instance?" "Like, uh..." "Go on." "Just a minute, I'm thinking." "Tell me." "Like, uh, kissing." "Kissing?" "Mm-hmm." "What has kissing got to do with the sleeping pill?" "Very little." "We were talking about asking someone to do something, then changing your mind." "You see?" "No." "Let me put it this way." "Sometimes you meet somebody and you start wondering what it would be like if he kissed you." "And you can hardly stand it until he does kiss you." "And when he does you expect maybe bells are gonna ring." "You think maybe you'll come unglued and you'll fly out in all directions." "And you know what happens?" "I can't imagine." "Nothing." "Mm-mm." "Nothing." "Nothing?" "You don't want him to kiss you anymore because you've changed your mind." "You see why I do not want to take the pill?" "It's not too clear." "Are you gonna take that thing or not?" "Well, I guess it wouldn't kill me, would it?" "What are you holding your nose for?" "Because I cannot stand the taste of it." "What does holding your nose got to do with tasting it?" "Say, that's a great idea, Roger." "Are you hungry?" "I could fix us some sandwiches and coffee." "No." "I am not hungry, and you should not take coffee with a sleeping pill." "Why?" "Because it's a stimulant." "Oh?" "What should I take?" "Milk." "Hot milk." "Have you got some?" "Why did you suggest it?" "No." "I didn't." "I was saying..." "You did say coffee would be the thing I shouldn't take..." "I don't have any coffee, any milk, and it's after 2:00 in the morning." "I know." "And here I am, keeping you awake and you have to fish tomorrow." "That's right." "I don't know, Roger." "Everything I do seems to be wrong." "When I got the idea of getting you up here, it seemed to be just the way to help Easy and her father." "And I've given you nothing but trouble, and you've been so sweet about it." "I haven't been sweet about it." "You've been a stinker some of the time." "But that's because I was wrong." "I deserved it." "Anyway, I don't think you'd believe me if I told you I was sorry." "But I really am." "Now, Abigail, I..." "You're not angry?" "Well, no." "I mean..." "Oh, Roger, when you're sweet to me like this, it just..." "Mm." "Oh, oh." "Wh..." "What's the matter?" "Roger?" "What is it?" "You know what we were talking about before?" "Uh, sleeping pills." "No, no." "Do you remember what we were talking about?" "Wanting someone to do something, and then wondering what it would be like if he did it?" "You mean kissing?" "Yes." "Roger, I have to ask you a question." "What is it?" "Would you please like to kiss me?" "Oh..." "Would you?" "Uh, that's the telephone." "Shh!" "All right, all right." " Hello?" " Hello, Willoughby." "This is Major Phipps." "What can I do for you?" "I'm here with your boss, Harvey Skaggs and Jim Bush, and we want to ask you some questions before the tournament starts." " We'll be over right away." " What did you say?" "We'll be over right away." "Uh, Major, just a minute." "Where are you?" " At the bar in the lodge." " Good." "I could use a nightcap myself, so I'll come over there." "Well, hurry up." "Yes, right away." "Now I have to get over to the lodge." "They were coming over here." "It wouldn't do at all for you to be found here." "I've got to get over there." "I'll see you tomorrow." "Roger, where do you keep your cigarettes?" "Are you still there?" "Yes, I wanted to ask you something." "Oh, I found the cigarettes." "Abby, I've got to get over to the lodge." "I know." "I'm not keeping you." "But you didn't answer me, and I had asked if you'd like to kiss me." "Oh, for Pete's sake." "I haven't got time!" "I ask him if he would like to kiss me, and he says he hasn't got time." "Well, he could've meant it that way." "Might've been nice." "If you specialize on trout or bass, you have more of a chance on getting the big one." "And it's usually the big one that wins the tournament." "Makes sense." "That's good enough for me." "You've been a lot of help." "It's all in the book." "Why don't you buy one?" "All your money, you can't take it with you." "I can buy another drink for everybody but you." "Not for me." "I'm too tired." "I'll buy my own." "I'm gonna turn in." "Good night." "Good night." "Good night." "He's a great guy." "A real sportsman." "Not many people'd help out a competitor." "Cadwalader, you're lucky to have a man like that." "We at the store feel very fortunate." "Abigail.!" "A" " Abigail, w-wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "You can't stay here." "Wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "Abigail, wake up." "She's out cold." "She took that sleeping pill." "I gotta get some sleep." "Gotta be up in three hours." "I'll bet you $50 I top you." "I'll take it." "And another $25 a day additional." "I beg your pardon, I'm the desk clerk." "Have you seen Mr. Willoughby?" "He just left here." "Oh, that's why his cabin didn't answer when I called." "What did you want with him?" "Miss Connors." "She called from San Francisco." "Miss Connors?" "Was the message important?" "The girl he's engaged to." "She was going to spend the night at Green Valley, but arrive here early in the morning." "I wouldn't wake him for that." "Yes, sir." "Why not let Miss Connors surprise him?" "Yeah, why not?" "How about another drink?" "Charlie, come in here." "Who is it?" "It's me, Easy." "Let me in." "What do you want?" "I am looking for Abigail." "She's no..." " Who did you say it was?" " Easy." "Can't you hear me?" "Yes, I heard you." "Just a minute." "Roger, are you going to let me in?" "Yes, just a minute." "Soon as I can." "Good morning, Roger, I was..." "What on earth are you doing in that thing?" "The zipper's stuck." "See if you can help me." "First, where is Abigail?" "How should I know?" "She came over here last night, and she didn't come back." "She didn't?" "No." "Now, where is she?" "In there." "Well, Roger!" "Look, I didn't have anything to do..." "You didn't?" "She took a sleeping pill." "I slept on the floor." "Very romantic." "What a pity." "Don't you believe me?" "Sure." "But I better get her out of here." "First help me outta this thing." "I think the zipper's jammed." "All right." "Let's see." "I can't seem to..." "Wait a minute." "It is stuck, isn't it?" "I'm trying to find Mr. Roger Willoughby." "He's in cabin number five." "Yes, ma'am." "That's right over there." "Thank you kindly." "Ow.!" "Don't be so rough." "Hold still." "It's not my fault that the zipper is stuck." "I didn't say it was your fault." "I just wanna get out of this." "Okay." "Put your hands up top here." "Hold on and I'll pull." "Well, I'll try, but..." "Good morning." "Why, Tex!" "Uh, I didn't expect to see you." "Obviously." "Didn't you get my message?" "No, uh, I didn't." "I reckon you didn't." "Uh, who's this?" "Oh, this is Miss, um..." "Mueller." "And Miss..." "I guess you're gettin' awfully mixed-up, Roger." "Connors." "So, you're Easy?" "How do you do?" "Yeah." "His zipper got stuck..." "Tex, if you're wondering what I'm doing in this..." "What could you be doing in a thing like that?" "I slept in it." "Why?" "What do you mean, why?" "It seems a funny thing to do." "Don't they have beds in these cabins?" "Of course they have." "I was trying out some new equipment." "New equipment?" "Yes, for the store." "And Miss Mueller happened to come by and find you?" "Exactly." "Isn't that nice?" "And, uh, she was helping you with your zipper?" "It was stuck before." "Good morning." "Willoughby, do you know what time it is?" "You have less than ten minutes before starting time." "Yes, I'm sorry." "I'll get dressed right away." "Before y'all start, may I use your bedroom?" "Oh, no, Tex!" "I feel all dusty, and I'd like to freshen up." "But Easy can take you over to the lodge." "I'll be glad to show you." "Thank you very much." "Roger, I'll see..." "Good morning, everyone." "Roger, is this some of the equipment you're tryin' out?" "I hope the story..." "Tex, she came in last night just to borrow a sleeping pill." "There's no use explaining." "She's never gonna believe you." "I certainly won't believe you." "Good-bye!" "Uh, but, Tex!" "Just a minute, Miss Connors." "Don't do anything foolish." "Just be thankful that Willoughby has sown his wild oats before you were married." "Now he's got them all out of his system." "Haven't you, Willoughby?" "I did not sow any wild oats!" "Then what were you doing..." "You mean that zipper was really stuck, and all she wanted was a sleeping pill?" "Ohh!" "Wait!" "Tex, please." "You gotta listen to me." "There's a perfectly simple explanation." "I don't wanna hear it." "That's not fair." "You've got..." "Hey, only got five more minutes." "All the other fishermen will be wearing pants." "Tex, I've gotta go or I'm gonna lose my job." "You got to wait until tonight so I can explain everything." "Will you do that?" "Do you really think you can explain?" "I can if you'll listen." "All right." "Good." "I don't know why, but I'll be here." "I'll call you." "It'll be sometime after 6:00." "Okay." "Willoughby, I don't mind your having fun, but remember, you're representing the store." "Mr. Cadwalader, I've taken just about all I'm gonna take." "I don't think you're concentrating on this tournament!" "Shut up." "Very well, Willoughby." "Roger, I'm sorry." "I didn't mean to make all this trouble." "Everything you do makes trouble." "I just fell asleep!" "That's why I was in your bed." "Why come out and act as though..." "As though what?" "Make Tex think what she did?" "Wasn't she mad?" "She was about the maddest woman I've ever seen." "Is this here some new equipment that you are trying out?" "Well, I do not believe it!" "Don't hit me, Roger." "I'm going in there and get dressed." "If you're still here by the time I come out..." "Willoughby.!" "Yes, I'm coming!" "You've got three minutes." "Mm-hmm." "Okay." "Good." "Bye." "Gentlemen, welcome to the 36th annual Wakapoogee fishing tournament." "Printed copies of the rules have been made available to all of you, but I'm gonna run over them again in case some of you missed a few." "There'll be three days fishing." "Your best fish of each day will count in your total points." "The tournament day will start at the sound of this bell." "All fish must be weighed in by sundown." "Are there any questions?" "In that event, gentlemen, the best of luck to all of you." "Well, Willoughby, I see you decided to wear pants after all." "Yeah." "The fish might have gone for those polka-dot pajamas." "Well, here we go." "May the best man win." "Good luck, Major." "He'll need it." "I'm gonna beat you because I've got his book." "10:00, 11:00, 9:00." "The man with this book wins." "Well, come along." "Come along, Napoleon." "This way to Waterloo." "You just read the book." "He wrote it." "Ah. "Fish are likely to be found... about 20 yards from the shore."" ""When casting, always aim the hook at one particular spot."" "Ow!" "Oh." "Oh." "Read this book..." "Fishing reel." "Now..." "Oh." "Come back here." "And to think they call this... fishing "fun."" "I suppose you saw the whole thing." "Amazing." "Absolutely amazing." "Not even Confucius could comment on what I saw." "Now you want five dollars not to tell people about it?" "No, no, no." "This one's on the house." "Nobody'd believe it." "That's quite a fish you caught." "Yeah." "Take a real big one to beat you today." "White man turning blue." "White man need fire inside, make white man warm." "When red man talk like that, white man knows something's coming." "All right, go ahead." "Want a drink?" "What is it?" "Old Indian drink, formerly made from moose blood 'til we ran out of moose." "What's in it now?" "Low cholesterol tribal herbs, safflower oil, a little alcohol, 120 proof." "Very good." "How much?" "Five dollars." "For one drink?" "Ha!" "One drink, whole bottle." "Five dollar minimum." "As the great Chief Confucius..." "Never mind." "Too cold." "Ah!" "Pretty good." "Roger Willoughby, five pounds, eight ounces." "I got you beat!" "That's a nice fish, Willoughby, but Major Phipps leads you by three ounces." "You mean the Major and I..." "Sure." "We're ahead of the whole bunch." "Unless somebody else comes in with a bigger one real soon." "Never thought I'd beat you." "Well, Major, you're one of the few people that can say that." "I just went by your book." "That's all." "Good." "Keep it up." "Told you, Skaggs." "The man with the book wins." "Yeah." "How much did that little sardine you caught weigh?" "Never mind." "I'll pay you the $50 I owe you... if you'll stop talking about it." "Why don't you pay me now?" "Hello?" "Hello." "Oh, hello, Roger." "How'd y'all do in the tournament?" "Pretty well." "I got a big one." "I'm in second place." "Well, good for you." "Hey, you don't sound as mad as you were." "Well, it could be I cooled off a bit." "When I thought about it, it just didn't seem quite like you." "Just how did you mean that?" "Not like you think." "All right." "I'll come by and pick you up." "Oh, Roger, I'm just putting on my dress." "Why don't you go to the lodge, and I'll meet you there, okay?" "All right." "Hurry up." "Okay." "Bye." "We hear you are second in the tournament, Mr. Willoughby." "Yeah, I was lucky." "Would you like a drink out here?" "Yes, thank you very much." "I'd like that." "Vodka martini on the rocks." " Make it two of'em." " Yes, sir." "Oh, congratulations, Roger." "You had a great day." "Or is that the usual?" "The unusual." "Keep it up." "I'm betting on you." "Oh, Roger, we are so proud of you!" "We're all excited!" "Abby just couldn't believe it." "You know what she said?" "No." "She said, "I knew Roger could do it." Hmm?" "Well, she said it." "Doesn't sound like her." "Oh, are you still mad at her?" "Why?" "Because of what she said to Tex." "You speak as though Abby meant to make trouble." "Trouble?" "That girl is a walking disaster." "Every time I'm near her, something awful happens." "Is that why you, why you kissed her?" "What?" "When?" "Last night." "She asked me to." "She doesn't know what she's doing." "She did?" "Oh, Roger, do you always know what you're doing?" "Of course I do!" "And last night you kissed her." "Well, I'd hardly call it a kiss." "That's what Abby said, but you did kiss her." "Yes, I did!" "You see, that's a beginning." "Oh, uh, two drinks." "Are you expecting somebody?" "Is Tex coming?" "Yes, she is." "Well, then I better make it quick." "We were talking about..." "You kissed Abby." "And I say this is some kind of a beginning, isn't it?" "Beginning?" "Of what?" "Don't you know what psychiatrists say?" "No." "The love impulse, Love impulse!" "Especially in a male, shows itself first in conflict." "That's probably why Abby and you fight all the time." "What?" "Are you nuts?" "You're as crazy as she is!" "But, Roger, after all we have done for you!" "And Abby worked so hard to teach you how to..." "You catch one fish, and now you start talking like this!" "Oh, it just makes me mad!" "Uh, Easy, wait." "Roger, I don't want to talk to you." "I'm mad!" "Don't turn around!" "Just stand still." "Take off your hands!" "What's the matter with you?" "Feel the back of your dress." "What?" "Your dress." "Oh, Roger, did you do that?" "Of course I didn't do it." "You must have caught it on the back of the chair." "Well, do something about it, but don't go away." "I won't." "We've got to get out of here." "We'll just walk." "Okay." "Right." "Now, start with your right foot." "Ready?" "Willoughby!" "I want to tell you something." "Willoughby!" "Ah, there, Willoughby, I've been looking for you." "I'll be with you in a minute, Cadwalader." "I'm afraid that boy's in trouble again." "Phew!" "I thought we'd never get out of there." "Let me have a look." "I can't see here." "Let's go to the light." "Better hurry up." "Somebody's liable to come along." "Roger, I think this thing is stuck." "Do you think you can fix it?" "Yeah, let me try." "Roger, you better hurry." "I think..." "I am hurrying!" "Roger, somebody is coming!" "Oh, my tie!" "Wait a minute!" "As soon as we get to..." "Well, Roger, just how do you explain this?" "Well, Tex, I..." "Every time I see you, you're up to your neck in zippers." "It was an accident." "My..." "She sat in a wicker chair..." "And you just got your tie caught in her zipper." "I tell you, it was an accident." "I don't want to marry a man who has as many accidents as you do.!" "Good-bye, Roger!" "And don't bother to call me." "Get this tie out of here." "Uh, I..." "I..." "You... fish!" "Major Phipps, four pounds, three ounces." "Good, good, good." "Congratulations, Major." "That's high for the day so far." "All right, dig in your pocket, Skaggs." "Come on." "Pay up!" "I'll give you the $50, but if you mention that book, I'll make you eat it." "What about, Willoughby?" "What did he do?" "He hasn't checked in yet." "There's still 20 minutes left." "You still think you can beat him?" "I led yesterday." "You want to bet on today?" "Sure, I do." "Certainly." "All right, between you and Willoughby, I'll bet..." "Here comes Willoughby now." "What kind ofluck did you have, Willoughby?" "Oh, just fair." "Hey!" "Wow!" "Fair, he said." "You still want to bet?" "Roger Willoughby, four pounds, eight ounces." "Congratulations, Willoughby!" "Fine work." "You two are out in front again." "Only, Willoughby, now you lead the major by... what is it... three or two." "Two ounces." "I'm sorry, Major." "Don't be ridiculous." "I'm tickled to be that close." "Two ounces isn't much of a lead." "I might make it up tomorrow." "You might just do that." "I'll see you." "You want to bet on tomorrow?" "Against Willoughby?" "What for?" "I make enough money off you." "Hi there." "Hmm." "Well, now, that is an enthusiastic greeting." "I was gonna ask you a question." "I think I'll ask anyway." "Did you ever dream that on the second day of the tournament, you'd be in first?" "Now that's an intelligent question." "I thought you'd say something like that." "How did you catch that fish?" "You didn't tell me about the first one." "How'd you get this one?" "I was climbing up a tree..." "Oh, please, don't give me that stuff about the bird." "You're not gonna answer me, are you?" "No." "Why?" "What's the matter, Roger?" "Nothing." "Let me have another drink." "Oh, no, thanks." "I don't really care for one." "You're sure?" "Positive." "Is it Tex?" "You couldn't convince her, could you?" "Not in two words." "What?" "What two words? "Hello, Tex."" "Then she hung up." "Did you call her back?" "Four times. "Hello, Tex." Hang up. "Hello, Tex."" "I couldn't get past "Hello, Tex." Now she's gonna have to call me." "Oh, she will." "Mm-hmm." "Yeah." "Yes, sir, she'll make up some kind of an excuse." ""Roger, did you all leave your cigarette lighter in my apartment?" "Oh, you didn't?" "Well, I guess it was some other gentleman caller then."" "She'll make you call her back somehow." "She's gonna have to wait a long time." "How many drinks have you had, Roger?" "Confucius say, "Woman who stick nose in other people's drink... is liable to get it punched."" "Confucius also say that fisherman who have too many martinis only catch olive." "I suppose you're right." "Let me have a check, please." "Come on." "I'll walk you home." "I hate domineering females." "I'll walk you home." "Okay." "Roger?" "Hmm?" "You know last night when Easy's dress came unzipped?" "Did you tell her that you thought I was crazy?" "Yes, I did." "I was kind of upset by the way everything was happening." "Mm-hmm." "Well, it's all right." "I don't mind." "After all the trouble I've made for you," "I don't blame you if you don't like me." "Oh, it isn't I don't like you, Abigail." "Matter of fact, there are times..." "What kind of times?" "Times when I find you... strangely attractive." ""Strangely attractive?"" "What do you mean?" "What's "strangely attractive?"" "Well, like a bird watching a snake." "Now I'm a snake." "That's good." "Go right in there and..." "I didn't mean it like that." "I mean it's... kind of a fascination." "I never know what you're gonna do next." "Oh, yeah?" "It's like living on the slopes of a live volcano." "Oh, well, I like being a live volcano better than being a snake!" "That's a pretty good line, Roger." "I mean you're exciting." "Oh, Roger, you mean there are times when you like me?" "Yes!" "Well, for Pete's sake, why didn't you just come right out and say it?" "I just did." "Well, you said, "strangely attractive."" "That's something you say to the bearded lady at the circus." "All right, Abigail." "There are times when I like you." "Is this one of them?" "I guess it must be, because right now..." "Right now I'm wondering what it would be like if I kissed you." "You're wondering?" "Yeah." "Well, for Pete's sake, don't just stand there." "I mean, do something." "I mean, don't just stand there." "Are you gonna do it or not?" "Uh, I go out of my mind..." "Will you shut up?" "Ooh." "Mmm." "Well, no!" "What's the matter?" "What?" "That wasn't any good." "What wasn't any good?" "That kiss." "What?" "The kiss wasn't any good." "Well, I'm sorry, Roger, but you shouldn't waste your time if you want to kiss me again..." "Of all the nerve." "Because it won't ever work out." "Because I'll always look at you as a friend." "Yeah." "Even though you can't kiss, it doesn't make any difference." "I just am sorry, but what else am I gonna say?" "Oh, hell!" "I wasn't finished, Roger." "I had a few other..." "Oh, got it snarled again." "Ow!" "Oh, uh..." "Uh..." "Uh..." "Better pull him up on the bank." " Roger, look behind you!" " I will in a minute!" "Roger, you dope.!" "Would you please look where you're going.!" "Come on, you!" "Get out of there!" "Come on!" "Ooh." "Go on.!" "Get going.!" "Hey, Roger, hurry up!" "You've got a fish, a big one!" " Well, you get him!" " I can't!" "It's against the rules!" "Come on!" "No, no, no!" "Roger, get the net!" "Oh!" "Oh, Roger!" "Oh, that's a beauty!" "A real big one!" "Oh, I bet nobody..." "Jeepers." "What's the matter with you?" "Oh, my goodness!" "I never thought it'd happen." "You're liable to win this tournament." "Probably." "Then what?" "And then what?" "Than I'll write a new book on how to catch a fish." "You know how you do it?" "You sit on a log and turn your back to the fish." "Or you climb up a tree and fall on it." "Or you drag it up on shore until a bear tells you that's far enough." "That's a fine way to catch fish." "Yeah." "Well, it's all my fault." "I got you into this mess." "Well, at least I don't have to catch any more." "What do you mean by that?" "I mean the tournament's over." "After I turn this one in, I don't want to see another fish." "No, I suppose you don't." "Suppose you don't." "I'll see you." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." " Yeah?" " Willoughby?" "Yes?" "This is Cadwalader." "Well, boy, I always knew you had it in you." "Mr. Bagley just came in with the final score." "You are now officially the winner of the Wakapoogee tournament." "Willoughby?" "Do you hear me?" "Yes, Mr. Cadwalader, I heard you." "Is there something wrong?" "No." "Why don't you come over here now and have a drink with us and celebrate?" "Yes." "Willoughby, are you..." "Unpredictable fellow, that Willoughby." "Real genius." "Something's wrong with him." "Celebrate." "Who is it?" "Roger, it's me, Abby." "Come on in." "I have to talk to you." "I don't feel like talking, Abby." "I know, but I've got something I have to tell you." "I know you're not gonna like it, and I don't like saying it." "Abigail..." "But if you'll just let me say it, then I'll go away and won't bother you any more." "Abigail..." "Now let me finish, please." "Actually, there are two things I have to say." "The first is that this has all been my fault and I'm sorry." "I'm very sorry." "Because I won the tournament?" "That's the second thing I have to say." "You can't take that trophy." "You just can't take it." "Abigail..." "Now, please let me finish." "You can't take that." "You've got to tell them the truth." "Do you know what'll happen?" "I know it'll mean you'll lose your job and your customers, but you've got to do that." "Once you start fooling people, you have to go on and keep on fooling them and, and... you're too nice a guy to be a phony... and keep on being a phony." "Now, that's all I'm gonna say." "If you'll..." "Just go ahead and do that." "I just couldn't tell her I'd already decided to do it." "It's funny." "She makes it easier for me." "Hi." "Congratulations." "Thanks." "Well, Willoughby." "Here's the champion." "What'll you have, Willoughby?" "Make it something expensive." "Skaggs is buying." "Not for you." "I'm buying this one, gentlemen." "Before we have anything to drink," "I'd like to tell you something." "Yeah?" "What is it?" "Excuse me just a minute." "Mr. Bagley, would you mind coming over here for a minute?" "I'd be glad to." "I'd like you to hear this." "All right." "There's the trophy, all shined up for you." "Yeah, that's just what I want to talk to you about." "That trophy isn't mine." "What?" "What?" "You're the winner." "Major Phipps is the winner." "You're off your rocker." "I didn't win." " Yes, you did, Major." " Phipps didn't win." "I told you that." "Willoughby, you haven't been drinking, have you?" "Not enough to make any difference." "And you feel all right?" "Yes." "Willoughby, I weighed those fish myself." "Gentlemen, please, let me talk." "I saw it." "L" " I-I..." "I owe you an explanation." "L..." "I want to apologize." "You all took it for granted that I knew all there was about fishing." "L" " I-I wrote a book on it." "I must be a fisherman." "Yeah." "Up until this tournament, I've never been fishing in my life." "Are you telling the truth?" "Yes, I am." "Then, Willoughby, you must be a..." "Fraud." "That's probably the word you're looking for." "Maybe a phony too." "And maybe you're right." "I never said I was a fisherman, did I?" "No, you didn't." "I guess he didn't." "I only told you how to fish." "And you told it good." "What about the three fish you won the tournament with?" "Well, now..." "Yeah!" "You didn't catch them out of a book!" "That was dumb luck." "It was a sheer accident." "No relation to fishing as you all know it." "But you caught them." "Oh, yeah." "One of them caught me." "The second one committed suicide while my line was hung over a branch." "What about the third one?" "I hooked that one, all right." "Then why are you disqualifying?" "Isn't there something in the rules that says a fisherman can't get any outside help?" "Yes, there is." "From any living source." "This one was living, all right." "I got help from a bear." "Which disqualifies me." "Look, fellas, I didn't earn the trophy." "Major Phipps did." "Well, by George." "This never happened before." "Willoughby, I'm stunned." "Completely stunned." "You're fired, of course." "I expected to be." "Congratulations, Major." "Thank you." "Good night, gentlemen." "Good night, Willoughby." "Well?" "Well, I don't know what to say." "Well, don't fall on your sword about it." "What?" "That's a joke, son." "Hell, I just won a tournament!" "I don't feel much like celebrating, but I'll try." "Make mine a triple... because I understand you're buying." "Good company, isn't he?" "Easy, I thought you were never coming." "You wanted to see me?" "The desk clerk told me that you asked..." "That was a half an hour ago." "I was beginning to wonder... if you'd disappeared off the face of the earth too." "Who's disappeared?" "Abigail!" "I looked all over the place for her." "Where is she?" "Well, she..." "She's gone." "What did you want with her?" "I want to talk to her." "I'm sorry, but she doesn't want to talk to you." "How do you know?" "That's what she said." "How does she know until she hears what I have to say?" "I don't know, but that's exactly what she said." "Easy, I want to see her!" "Why?" "Because." "You'll have to give me a better reason than that." "Well, I..." "What?" "Go ahead." "I'm in love with her." "After all she's done to you?" "Yes." "And don't ask me why." "Well, I don't know what to do." "I'll come back." "Oh, no, no, stay here." "What do you mean, you don't know what to do?" "Well, you see, Abby made me promise not to tell anyone where she has gone to." "And I just can't break that promise." "That's silly." "Now, come on, tell me." "Where is she?" "Well, I'll do what I can." "You know I can't speak German." "Roger, I am sorry, but I..." "White man want translation?" "Here it comes." "How much?" "Well, in the mood you're in, it would be pretty easy to put the bite on you." "But I don't want anybody to think I'm mercenary." "Five okay?" "Go ahead." "The fräulein said that Miss Page... is camping by the waterfall at the east end of the lake." "How do you know German?" "I don't." "I just took her there." "Well, you can take me too." "One other item." "I know." "I'll give you ten dollars more if you hurry." "That's the item." "Meet me at the dock." "You better be quiet." "She's camped right there behind those trees." "See where the light is?" "Yeah, I see it." "You want me to wait for you?" "No." "There's no way to get back." "There's no bridge." "That's all right." "Want me to pick you up like tomorrow morning?" "Be just a slight charge." "I'll send up a smoke signal." "Keep some wood dry." "Looks like there's a storm comin' up." "One other thing before you go." "What'll it cost me?" "This one's on the house." "It's free." "Just remember, a squaw never knows what she wants until you tell her." "Is that from Confucius too?" "No, that's from me." "Confucius didn't get around as much as I do." "Be careful getting out." "Yeah." "Will you give me a shove off?" "Happy hunting." "Roger, what are you doing here?" "I just wanted to..." "I don't want to talk to you." "I don't want to see you." "I want to be by myself." "So if you'll please go and get in your boat and go home." "Roger, I thought I told you to go away." " I can't." " Why?" "I must've left the boat untied." "It's gone." "Well, that's just like you." "And I can't swim either." "Remember?" "I suppose you'll just have to stay then." "But just don't talk to me." "All right." "I won't." "You don't mind if I sit down, do you?" "I don't really care what you do." "But just don't talk to me." "Just wait 'til I get a hold of Easy!" "I told her I didn't want to see you." "I told her I didn't want to see anybody." "Don't talk to me." "That was an owl." "Roger?" "Did you tell the tournament committee that you're a fake?" "Yes, I did." "Did you get fired?" "Yes, I did." "And I talked to Tex." "We're finished." "For good." "Then it was all my fault." "Look, why don't you just go away, somewhere, so I don't have to see you." "What are you doing?" "Getting in out of the rain." "Well, you just get right out of here." "I will not." "This is my sleeping bag." "You think I want to be in here?" "Oh, you mean you don't?" "No." "I'm just not gonna stay out there and get wet." "Well, all right." "Then just don't talk to me." "What is it that you're doing?" "You're too far over." "I'm what?" "Move over here." "I will not." "I'm trying to get this zipper shut." "I can't do it if you keep pulling the cover." "Oh." "Is that all right?" "Thank you." "Roger..." "If I have to stop talking, why don't you stop?" "All right." "I certainly will." "I can't see why Cadwalader would fire Willoughby." "It isn't clear to me either." "What will I do without him?" "You're gonna lose more money to me, that's what." "I don't care if he is a fraud." "He still knows more about fishing than any man alive." "Willoughby's no fraud." "He's an honest man." "Yeah, he just proved that." "Yeah, he did." "What difference does it make if he can't fish?" "It's whether I can fish that's important." "I don't want to lose him!" "I agree with you, but Suffering Sam over there will never change his mind." "Look at him.!" "Bleeding from a mortal wound.!" "Probably thinking about the thousands of people that'll read about it." "It's bound to hit the papers." "Yeah, that's..." "Thousands of people." "Skaggs, you old goat, that's it." "What's it?" "What'd I say?" "What you just said." "You gave me the inspiration of my life." "Come on." "Cadwalader, I want to talk to you." "Huh?" "I said I wanted to talk to you." "What about?" "Well, I, uh..." "First, do something with that thatched roof of yours." "Oh, I'm sorry." "Cadwalader, you're an ass." "An utter ass." "I beg your pardon." "Why?" "Why?" "For firing Willoughby." "Oh, he can't fish." "Can't fish?" "That's exactly what I want to talk about." "I don't follow you at all." "Because this was a tournament, he disqualified himself." "But the fact remains, he caught the winning fish." "Doesn't that mean anything to you?" "I'm afraid it doesn't." "Oh, you mutton-head!" "It means that any darn fool... can catch a record fish if he's using the right equipment." "Thousands of people all over the country will read about it." "Yes, isn't it horrible." "Horrible, nothing!" "I know these amateur fishermen." "Roger Willoughby will be an inspiration." "Every man jack will say, "If Willoughby can do it, just give me the right rod, reel and lure, and so can I."" "A million dollars of free publicity, and you fired him." "You ought to be ashamed." "Oh, my goodness!" "I never thought of that!" "You want me to set him up... in business in competition to you?" "No, no, no, no, no!" "If you don't, somebody else will." "You better hire him back before he gets away." "And fix that roof of yours." "I must hurry." "I've got to find him." "Thank you, gentlemen." "Thank you very much." "Oh, Willoughby!" "Willoughby!" "Oh, Willoughby.!" "What do you want?" "Hold it." "I think I hear them." "What is it?" "Wh-What is it?" "Sounds like Cadwalader." "Oh, look out, Abigail!" "What?" "What's the matter?" "Don't move!" "Why..." "What..." "Where are we?" "We're out in the middle of the lake!" "What are we doing here?" "Hold still!" "Willoughby!" "Can you hear me, Willoughby?" "Yes, I hear you." "I made a mistake." "We need you back, Willoughby!" "Hey, Roger!" "You got your job back, I think." "Please, Willoughby." "Lie still!" "Look!" "We're gonna tip over!" "We'll give you a raise, Willoughby." "How much will you give him?" "I'll talk to you later." "Will you come back?" "Yes, Mr. Cadwalader!" "Oh, that's fine, Willoughby." "Do you want us to send you any help?" "Never mind, Mr. Cadwalader!" "Do you think he's in trouble?" "Yes, but it's too late to help him." "Listen!" "Hmm?" "Do you think you could like me the way you did that night?" "What night?" "You know, when you kissed me." "You said that kiss was no good." "Oh, I'm sorry I said that, Roger." "I prefer to forget that night ever happened." "Oh, Roger, I was Iying when I said the kiss wasn't any good." "You were..." "Sure!" "Honest, I was!" "I was just pretending." "Do you think that you could find me... strangely attractive again?" "Hmm?" "Well, I don't know." "L..." "Mm-mm." "Maybe if you kissed me, just a little." "Hmm?" "If you didn't like it, you could stop." "Maybe you would like it, but then again if you didn't..." "Sometimes when people..." "Mm-hmm." "Will you shut up?" "Oh, John, you shouldn't have done that." "Why, Marcia?" "Because this picture's over." "This is the end."