"THE BACHELOR" "Story:" "Antonio Pietrangeli" "Screenplay:" "A.Continenza, R.Maccari A.Pietrangeli, E. Scola" "Assistant Directors:" "F.Zeffirelli, A.Crispino" "Art Director:" "U. Blaettler" "Music:" "A.F.Lavagnino Conducted by:" "C. Savina" "Edited by:" "Eraldo Da Roma" "Executive Producer:" "C.Bessi" "Director of Photography:" "Gianni Di Venanzo" "Directed by:" "Antonio Pietrangeli" "Original Eng subs by Polifem Revised by edam17@KG" " March 2013" "See that young man about to get married?" "Well, it's not me." "I'm this one." "And put I'm staying!" "I can assure you I'll always keep this distance between me and marriage." "I'm best man because Armando is my dearest friend." "It really pains me he had to end up like this." "I thought him smarter, but..." "There he is!" "Poor schmuck!" "I had told him, but he: nothing, he was in love, said he was feeling alone." "O my God!" "Even Carla's here!" "I'd better pretend I don't see her!" "When I think I almost married Carla..." "All my life with only one woman!" "I have 20, what am I to do with the other 19?" "20?" "What am I saying!" "?" "30!" "By the way, did I write the number of the one from last night?" "No..." "Ah, here it is!" "8-7-16..." "She must live around Parioli." "Yes," "More than thirty!" "Anna, Ava, Beatrice, Elsa, Kati..." "I've even got with "K"!" "Maria-Grazia..." ""Article 141"" ""Marriage imposes on the spouses... "" ""the reciprocal obligation of cohabitation... "" "The first marriage for my baby..." "You are the bride's mother?" "No." "I'm the priest's mother." "".. she takes his family na... "" "".. family name and is obliged to accompany him wherever he decides to reside. "" ""Article 143"" "Silvana!" "They're all very nice!" " I want a few more from these ones." " Make me ten copies." " Alright." " Mother!" "Wanna see the pictures?" " Yes, show me." "Nice!" "Exquisite!" "Can I have them back a little?" "I have to show them around." "Have you seen..." " What say, Anna, can here be around 100 people?" " More!" "Then the grub must have cost them around 40,000 lire?" "At least..." "No!" "At Costanza's wedding it was 300 per person!" " Yes?" "They even had zuppa inglese!" "It's been awhile since we've met!" "Last time it was at poor Antonio's funeral." " But we've met one month ago!" "At Luisa's Confirmation." " Oh, yes!" " And now, who knows how long it will take." " No" "Uncle Carlo is almost eighty by now..." "Waiter!" " Waiter!" " Please..." " What comes next?" " Ice-cream, sir." " Can I have another slice of cake?" " In return, of course." " Yes, sir." " Do you want some, madam?" " No, thanks." "It's the child's." "He didn't want it now." "He'll have it later." "Of course!" "It's all paid for anyway." "Have you seen?" "Look!" "Everyone's taking something home, and you don't want to!" "No!" "It's not alright!" "If they see us what..." "Mommy!" "Don't cry, mommy!" "Why're you crying?" " Riccardo, it looks as if you never ate!" " Come, don't cry." " Do you want one?" " No, no, thank you!" "I'd be entitled to!" "30,000 lire cost me the present!" "Beautiful present!" "Remember when he said he went out with Silvana only to have fun?" " Sure I do!" " You did warn him to be careful!" " Sir, have one of these candies." " Are they special?" " I run them through the bride's wedding ring." "When one eats a candy run through a wedding ring, he's bound to get married in one year." " I'll fire both of you!" " What's wrong?" " What are you doing, playing smart?" "!" " It wasn't me..." " Just talk about marriage, and he gets neurotic!" " Didn't you know?" "Armando!" "Arma'!" " Why didn't you tell me Carla was coming?" " What do you care?" " I don't, but it embarrasses me." " Did you say hi to her?" "You think I'm stupid?" "I pretended not to see her!" " No!" "You must talk to her!" "You'll have to deal with her, now that I'll be away!" " I ?" "If she needs anything, I'll get it from Milan." "Yes, but now's different." "Remember the fridges her father ordered?" " Well?" " Well, she doesn't want them anymore!" "It's only normal; things get complicated, with the character she's got..." " If her father was a sergeant, she's a colonel!" " What're you two talking about?" "Nothing, I'm sorry..." "It's late, you have to go, the train won't be waiting for you." "Please..." "Mother!" " Oh!" "Carla, you too here!" "How're you?" " Hi." " I didn't see you." " No, you didn't see me..." " Had I seen you..." " So you didn't notice me?" "Eat, eat..." "One of my employees..." "No, I didn't notice." "You were educated in Switzerland alright, but in barracks, not in a boarding-school." "If that's what you want to tell me, go on pretending you didn't see me!" " Yet, I like you just for your character!" " And I dislike you just for yours!" " Carla, I was looking for you!" " Strange, only you say so!" " These are for you." "They bring luck!" " You're so kind, thank you." " We're off." " Yes?" "I'll go with you." " No, we're leaving right now." " No, let's go to the movie!" " What're you saying!" " And don't bother Claudia!" " Congratulations, and have a nice trip!" "I've told you, if you want to stay in our apartment till you find a house..." "Silvana agrees." "No, should I be the third wheel between newly-weds?" "I'm a bachelor," "I need my independence." "I'm in a boarding house, then I'll look for an apartment." "As you wish." "While I'm gone, don't think only about having fun!" "Remember, all the work rests on your shoulders!" " Have you left a note?" " Yes!" " Goodbye, Paolo, and thank you." " Bye." "Can I kiss the bride?" " Break a leg!" " Thank you!" " Both!" "Armando..." "I don't know what to tell you, only that..." "Moron!" " Bye." "Have a nice trip!" " Thank you." "He's lost already..." "They've cleaned up everything!" "I still have to taste this." "Here they are!" "Arma'!" "Get away, you!" "Alone, that's how a man must stay!" "No room available?" "I understand, thank you." " How're you, Elsa?" " Good day, sir." "There are problems." "Everything's booked." "Rome's swarming with tourists." "What are all these tourists doing here?" "Why don't they stay at home?" "Come with me, the newspaper's packed with guest houses!" "Look..." " What's he doing?" "Eating?" " Sorry, sir." "Just a snack." " Where's Fornari?" " In the store." "Read these ads." "Put away this thing, how many times must I say that?" "Good, you're here." "Take that away." "That's Armando's idea." "Results of marriage." "When he has babies, he'll start representing lollipops!" " Funny the boss, huh?" " Fornari, you make remarks?" "What do you want?" " I wanted to tell you, sir, that miss Carla refused the fridges." " Yes, I know." "And since they got here, I unloaded them in the store." " Who told you to?" "I'll unload you!" " But I thought..." "You thought what?" "You mustn't think!" "You must shut up and wait for me!" "Got it?" " Did they order them?" " Yes." " Then they gotta keep them." " What do we do now?" " Load them, and take them back to her!" "I hate it to always have to deal with such things." "I don't think so, you can be so persuasive with miss Carla..." "Hush, behave yourself, be serious, shut up, got it?" "Elsa!" "Well, you found a guest house?" " There's one: separate entrance, cheap, all comforts." " Must see it!" "When?" " Right away." "It was just vacated by a diplomat." " Oh, a diplomat!" "Then book it." "Hello?" "Madam?" "Yes." "It's agreed." " Alberi' !" " Hi." " What's with those fridges?" " I would take them, but says they don't work." " Says?" "Says who?" " I say so." " And who are you?" " One who was never enthralled by you." "Hi, Carla." "The fridges work just fine!" " You signed the contract, now you take them!" " Not a chance!" " Here she is!" "Let dad speak, he knows better!" " No, you see to it, I'm busy." "Let's not lose our time:" "I'm not taking that stuff!" "On the contract there was no model, nor price." "Alright..." "Model, price..." "What does it matter?" "Why do we always talk about such things, Carla?" "About what else?" "Some nerve you've got!" "Yet, when I first came to the shop, you were amiable, smiling." "True!" "I didn't know you well yet." " But I've always tried to explain..." " There's nothing to explain!" " Yes!" "You're mad at me ever since we went to that damned restaurant!" "There was a misunderstanding!" "I didn't know there were..." "upstairs rooms." "When the waiter came and asked us:" ""Will you take the cognac in the parlor?", I said:" ""Let's go have the cognac!"" " But I didn't know that the parlor was..." " Enough!" "It's a closed argument!" "No, it's not closed at all!" "You are always angry with me!" " Why not..." " Sir?" " What do you want?" " We're a little late, there was a jam." "Shall we unload?" "Ah, so you brought them back?" "!" " Alright, unload them." " Haven't you heard the lady?" "Unload!" " Are you glad?" " With a 12% discount, it's a deal!" "12?" "Who said 12?" " 12, or you're taking them back." " Alright, I got it, let's say 10." "I said 12." "This way, you'll learn your lesson." "Alright, only because it's you!" "11." " Alright?" " I said 12, and 12 it'll be." " Fine, but take them." "Forna'!" " Hey, Fornari!" " Sir?" "How did you manage it?" "What do you mean "how"?" "Forna', are there any traces?" "Can you see anything?" "No." "No, no..." "Goodbye!" " Please, don't mind the mess, I had to fire the maid this morning." " Don't worry!" "You know how it is with servants." "One can never..." "Look, this is your room." "Please, come in." "As you can see, it's cozy." "Sure, is not luxurious but is clean, and cleanliness is what counts, right?" "Excuse me, but did a diplomat live in here?" "Of course, Mr. Muratti, a true gentleman, quiet, discreet." "Some family problems." "It seems his wife was having an affair," "I don't know all the details, he left home and stayed here for two years." "Well?" "Don't you like it?" " It's not that..." " It's the best room I've got!" "Just for you, since you're a distinguished person." " Look..." " I like refined people." " That's how I am!" " I thought..." "I want to be able to choose my clients." "Madam, you mentioned an independent entry, but but it isn't at all independent." " But it is!" "I'll give you the keys!" "Mr. Mottimi, whom you've met..." "oh, you said you didn't, well, he sometimes got home late, with a couple of professors." "They made handouts for students until late at night, and..." " and..." " Listen madam,... madam... let me speak." "I don't have any students, it was my secretary who..." "Good day." "Madam, I'm going out, if you want to do my room." " Very well, miss." "Where to, today?" " Tel Aviv." "To Tel Aviv!" "Miss, I too practiced gliding, as young fascist.." " I'm glad, goodbye." " Goodbye!" " So, you don't like it?" " Of course I do!" " I like it." " So, you'll stay?" "Of course!" "I'll stay!" "Then..." "Madam, what are the terms?" "Don't worry!" "I consider my clients as guests." "Just a small expense refund, of course." "Linen, electricity, water, phone, gas..." " Madam, a socket..." " What for?" " A socket, for my electric shaver..." "Oh, imagine!" "Mr. Baghini caused a short circuit!" " Then what am I to do?" "Can't I shave?" " Not with the electric shaver!" "A massage, sir?" " A massage?" "Why?" " For your double-chin." " Hands off!" "It's conformation!" "I took after mom!" " I'm beginning to hate this Giulio!" " Only now?" " How about a rub, then?" " Why?" " You got a bald spot, see?" "Only if you pull off my hairs there is a spot!" "Gimme the comb!" " Oh my, how touchy you've become, sir!" " What touchy?" "You keep offending me!" "If there's something nice I have, is the hair!" "What rubbing!" " Is it good?" " I'd say!" "It's American!" " So there's no bald people there?" " How do I know!" "?" " Rub it yourself!" "You look like Gandhi!" " What are you doing tonight?" " And you?" " We're dining out of town." "Mario found a place where they make ham-stuffed chicken!" "Stuffed?" "With ham bits?" "No, the slices inside!" "Then, on the fire, the fat melts." "Hey!" "He says it's delicious!" " And where is it?" " Below Frascati." "What do you do, always eating?" "Enough with it, kid!" " I've got a move tonight..." " Which one?" " A Chinese girl." " A Chinese girl?" "!" "You marvel, huh?" " Bye, Giulio!" " See you, sir!" "What can I tell you?" "She's Chinese..." " Hong-Kong!" " Who set you up with her?" "Camillo!" "I told him I wanted a Chinese!" " Paolo!" " Hi!" " Hi, Paolo." " Hi, Camillo." "You're late." " I'm not!" " Let's go sit there and have a drink." " Let's." " I was waiting outside." " Why?" " I thought I had misunderstood." " No." " Will they repeat the show?" " Yes." " Nice?" " Very nice, really." " What are you having?" " A cognac." " Two cognacs." " Yes, sir." "What's up?" "We're here, drinking cognac, and the girls..." "We got a fix." " The girls didn't come?" " They came, but we're in 4 already." "Four?" "!" " You've brought 3 girls?" "!" " No. 2 girls, and a man." " A man?" " Yes." " You kidding me?" "You said the Japanese was for me..." " True, but what can I do?" " We send him away." " I can't do that." "We work together, and his father is a big shot..." "What do I care!" "Send him away!" "Let's do it some other time." "Tomorrow night, even!" " What about me?" "Where are the girls?" " There." "The Chinese came for me!" "You made a joke!" " It's bad luck." " O yes?" " Bad luck?" " I can't send him away." " Then you go and I'll take your place!" "The girls would be offended!" " Who?" "Them?" " Sure!" "I swear I'm through with you!" "Don't you call me anymore, cause..." " Get your hand off!" " Shut up, please!" "Camillo, you have abandoned us!" " A friend of mine, Mr. Anselmi." " How are you?" "You remember?" " Mr. Carbonati." " My friend called me..." " Paolo..." "Mr. Carbonati is leaving!" "Alone!" "Just a moment, to pay the tab." "Waiter!" "Camillo..!" "Sir..." "Sir..." "Sir!" " What is it?" " Sorry, you forgot to pay." " How much?" " 1,000." " For 2 cognacs?" " 2?" "You pay also for your friend?" "Then, it's 2,000." "You know, Mr. Camillo has an open account with us, so..." "So, he has an open account?" "Then put mine on his account." "Wait, Cami'!" " Wait, Cami'!" " Call me when you can!" "Hey, little Chinese, come, I too got a car!" "Cami', call me again!" "Go that?" "Some friend!" "There you go!" "Damn dogs..." "All of you have dogs, huh?" "Dogs are nice..." "He surely has fun, isn't it so, Jolly?" "Ragioner Ferrari, ragioner Ferarri, you've forgotten your wallet!" "There!" "Try and find my shaver now..." "Long lip." "Maybe he's got a long lip..." "And here's a pimple..." "And there it is..." "When you feel the cold, you're there..." "Pull out the white hair, and comes the black one." " Hel..." "O, hello!" " Hello." "A sad destiny is ours." "Always meeting on the doorstep." "Either you come in when I'm going out, or you going out when I'm getting in." "Our habits don't match." "I can't even escort you, as you're going to your room." " Where have you been all this time?" " Oslo." " Oslo!" "What do you do?" "Flying all the time?" "Or you have, as you put it, rest shifts?" "Maybe I'll be grounded for a week this month." "Wonderful!" "Anyway, I'll come and get you every day." " Et j'attendrai." " Goodbye." "Après-demain, alors, J'attendrai!" "Your father's coming from Tokyo?" "Are you happy?" "Laugh some more!" "May I?" " Stop!" "Where are you going?" " Don't you know me?" "I'm a regular!" "You can't go down!" " Hi!" "Welcome!" " Hi." "She's my cousin." "See?" "I'm here waiting for you today also." " I hope you haven't grown tired." " You know that it's a sweet waiting." " Here." "It's for you." " Again?" "!" " Yes." " You're always so sweet!" "Thank you." " It's a heart full with chocolates." "My heart!" "Amants sans lendemain," "Lovers with no tomorrow." "What have you said?" "It's a film." "Who was it with?" "..." "Charles Boyer." "Charles Boyer and Jennifer Jones." "But we will have a tomorrow, I suppose, won't we?" "Even an after tomorrow." "You see..." "For me, the real woman, is the one staying devotedly by you." "Giving all of herself, without asking for anything." "Nothing, nothing, nothing!" " Can I have a cigarette, please?" " Right...forget it." "Because love..." "Can last for a day, a week, a year... but then..." "Come on, don't smoke so much!" "Paolo..." "Do you really love me?" "Could I not love you?" "Maraschino..." "Good..." "It takes so little to be happy!" "Isn't it so?" " Paolo." " What?" "Do you know that stewardesses can't get married?" "Really?" "That's not fair!" "Why?" "It's true." "Because if they get married, they can't fly anymore." "So?" "Too bad!" "I loved flying, you know?" "Hey!" "Gabriella!" "What are you saying?" "Are you mad?" "You must fly!" "It's so beautiful!" "You want to give up your life, your call?" "It's wonderful to feel free up there, in the clouds..." "Looking from up there at men, crawling like worms..." "I'd like so much to fly!" "If only I could fly!" "I'd give anything..." "Yes, but every woman has the right to dream about a home, a family..." "Yes, that's true." "A family is nice." "The hearth... that human warmth..." " Must you really leave tomorrow?" " Unfortunately." "But I'm back in 2 days." "And you'll be there, waiting as always, right?" "There I will be!" "With the chocolates, right?" "And you arrive..." "After tomorrow, then." "I'll be waiting!" "They aren't bad, but in Rome you can get them for 300 lire tops." "Hi!" "I'm late!" "About time!" "Next time we'll send the plane home!" "They sought you." "First, lost the bus, then you felt ill, today they're all aboard." " Forgive me, but I had errands to do..." " Yeah, sure, I know your errands!" " Hurry, or you'll remain grounded!" " How many passengers?" " 41." "Livia..." "She got married on the 11th..." "Brunella, Brunella... here she is." "Brunella." "Should I?" "..." "No, not Brunella..." "Camillo..." "Why's he here?" "Off you go, Camillo!" "Carla." "That's it, Carla!" "Who calls Carla..." "She became so nasty..." "But, she'd like it, if I phoned." "She'd like it." "Let's call her." "Hello, Alberini shop." "Oh, it's you!" "How come?" "What do you want?" "What do I want?" "What do you want?" "Excuse me, I found your number in the memo..." "It has to be a mistake, because I have no reason to call you." "Unless it was dad." "You want to talk to him?" "Ah... no, no, no..." "I thought you called..." "Oh!" "Yes, you're right!" "They misspelled the name!" "Here it is." "Yes..." "It seemed Carla, but it's Clara." "Clara... a girlfriend of mine." "Great!" "Then, call Clara!" "Bye!" "What a temper..." ""Call Clara... "" "Daniela..." "Elena... what a nose she's got..." "Mom, no use looking at!" "There's one for each letter." "A guy like me..." "There's nothing at "H"..." "There's nothing at "H"..." "There is "hostess" at "H"..." "There was the hostess!" "Take these to Mr. Halden." "You're still here?" "!" "Do you want to eat again at the airport?" "No more errands in town?" "Listen, but really nobody called for me?" "No one." "You've asked me 10 times." "Should I announce it on the loudspeaker?" "Say, that position at the Milan branch, is it still open?" "Yes." "It seems you're taking it seriously..." "What's the matter?" "No..." "I was just asking." "If you had listened to me!" "Men only think about themselves!" "They're all selfish!" "They promise the moon and then, at the right moment, bye bye!" " What's that?" "The whole of it?" " The whole of it." " Well done!" " Sir..." "Here." "Go down there, you gave me a headache." " Guelfo..." "What next?" " Involtini." " No, not involtini!" " Excellent!" " The gentleman too had them." " Involtini?" " Involtini." " Alright." " Now." " Excellent." " Can't digest them in the evening." " At your age?" "At mine!" " I know..." " I couldn't live without this." " What is it?" " "Carbon Digercoc"" " Yeah?" " A teaspoon after meals..." " Helps digesting?" " There's garlic..." " Just a little, has to..." " Garlic's good with involtini..." " Don't worry about the garlic!" " I'll give you a little of this..." " I've never been able to digest garlic." "Good evening." " You saw that lady?" " Who's she?" " She comes every day and has a soup." " And she has a loaded son in Florence..." " No!" "?" "..." "Unbelievable!" "Go and get married!" "And when you're old, the children will take care of you..." "I see you think like me." "Children!" "As long as there's something to grab..." "But when they have to give, they don't know you anymore!" " Don't you think so?" " True!" " You ever thought of getting married?" " What?" "Ever thought of getting married?" " I'll tell you..." "When I was young, yes, But, you see..." " May I?" " Please, sit down." " Thank you." "I've always decided I'm better off alone." "Don't you agree?" "Excuse me if I dip the bread, I always liked it." "By all means!" "I always do the same!" " Where do you plan to end the evening?" " Me?" "Haven't planned anything..." "Hey, I told you to go away, go away, then!" "Why not spend the evening together?" " There's no wife waiting at home, right?" " Not mine for sure!" " And where shall we go?" " I don't know." "You see, I never make plans, it never works." "I rely on the unexpected." " It's more fun like this." " You say?" " Don't you?" "Ah..." "Puccini is always Puccini..." " Bravo!" "Encore!" " No way!" " No, no, no!" "They may believe it!" " As you wish." "I'd drive them away..." "Had we been married, you think we'd have been here tonight." "free to do whatever we wanted?" "At most, we could have gone out, with our respective ladies, like my office colleague that I greeted before." "No, don't turn now, they're looking." "But who?" " The one with the beautiful blonde?" " Yes." "She's the wife." "Imagine, she doesn't leave him for one second." "She even picks him up at work." " You follow me?" " Yes, I follow you!" "You understand that the poor man, walking with her, eating with her every day, every night, imagine the drag always sleeping with the same person?" "That's exactly what I am thinking of." "Shall we go to sleep, what say?" "We'd better." "This blonde is making us sad, isn't she?" "Hey, waiter!" " No, let me." "What're you doing?" "!" " No, no..." "I can't allow it." "You'll pay the next time." "And if we don't meet again?" " Anyway, I don't insist." " So, goodbye." " Aren't you going by Cavour St.?" " No, I'd rather walk, I'm not feeling too well" "Thanks a lot for the carbon, and for the nice evening." "Sir!" "And remember that us bachelors, we're valuable merchandise!" "Good evening, madam." "Good evening, sir." "Where have you been hunting tonight?" "No, no hunting..." "Just with friends." "I'm not even feeling well tonight." "You're young, you work, you have the right to have fun." "There's a letter for you," "I think it's from your mother." "You "think"?" "You know." "You always know everything." " Yes, it's from mother." " Mothers..." " She must be worrying about you." " I never write to her, poor woman." "Yes." "I don't have any children, I'm not married, but I understand what it means to a mother living far away from her son." " Does she only have you?" " No, there's also my sister." "She lives with her." "Oh, and do you go there often?" "My work doesn't allow me." "When I was studying I went for every holiday, now..." " Once, for Christmas..." " You've been to college here in Rome?" "No." "I didn't go to college." "Then, why your "Sir" appellation?" " I'm a manager, can't I be such?" " Sure, but the degree..." "What degree?" "I am not a graduate, but I went to high school." "Sometimes a good certificate is better than a bad degree, don't you know?" "Yes, I'm telling you." "Other things are important in life, I made it all on my own." " Oh my God!" " Well?" " What's the matter now?" " I don't know." "My stomach hurts." "You need a disinfectant." "Hot water with lemon and garlic." "I'll make it now!" "No garlic, forget it..." " I don't like the way you look tonight." " No, madam, I feel better, I feel better." "Must be tired." "I'll have a good night's sleep and tomorrow I'll be fine." "Goodnight" "Good night, Mr. Anselmi." "Sure, "mister" because I don't have a degree..." "Ma'am..." "Mother's fine, you know." " Good night." " Good night." "No!" "No!" "Oh, my God, I don't feel well!" "Oh, God, I don't feel well!" "All fault of that dotard!" ""Eat the involtini!" And I ate them." ""Have the carbon"." "And I took it..." "But I'll denounce him!" "I'll send him to jail!" "Oh, God!" "Madam!" "Maaadam!" "Madam!" "I'll make a chamomile." "Boil the water first." ""Chamomile" Is it "Chammomile" or "Chamomile"?" "Whichever way it's said..." "Oh God!" "Imagine if there's anything for me!" "I feel so bad!" "The thermometer?" "Look where it... 102.6º !" "No!" "No!" "No!" "Go away!" "Go away!" "I'm sick!" "Get down!" "Go away!" "I could die!" "I'm sick!" "Understand?" "I'm sick!" "Go away!" "This mongrel!" "What a brute!" "You're so selfish!" "You're gone pay for this!" "I'll tie your ear and cut it!" "Don't you understand?" "I could die!" "I could really die!" "Then in the papers:" "the funeral will depart from the domicile." "What domicile?" "I don't have one!" "It'll take off from the guest house." "What a shame!" "Everyone'll laugh:" ""He was living in a guest house"!" "Wasn't he the one always having fun?" "What fun?" "!" "I've never traveled anywhere!" "Did you know I've never been abroad?" "At Honolulu, for example." "But I'll go to Honolulu..." "I'll surely go..." "You're asking when?" "When I want!" "I've been told women dance naked and sing in Honolulu..." "You've finally remembered me!" "You're all sweaty." "What's wrong?" "I was sick ma'." "Almost died." "They didn't understand anything." "The liver, food poisoning, enterocolitis..." "But you left in good health, you were fine..." "Don't know!" "No, ma', don't put your hands on my face." "They're so heavy!" "Come, I'll give you a fresh egg to drink." "Can't find these in Rome, you know!" "If instead of going to the city, you'd have stayed here, you wouldn't have been reduced to this." "Why, don't people fall ill here also?" "Mother, you..." "Virgi', are you well?" "And your fiancé?" "Fine, thanks." " It's not health that he lacks!" " Please, mother!" " Why?" "What happened?" " We'll talk later." "Of course!" "Alone!" "With no help!" " Without a home!" " Come on, mom!" "You think I live in a cave?" "Worse than a cave!" "A man without a family, is like a stray dog." "Prone to all dangers, to all hardship." "Why don't you settle down?" "What's in your brain?" "That I'll live forever?" "With all my ailments, I gotta die without seeing you all settled down?" "What're you doing?" "Crying?" "!" "Why are you crying?" "All the same, you mothers?" "First you cry when the son is bachelor, then when he marries." "So, you always cry?" "Stupid!" "You young people, you're all alike!" "You never speak in earnest." "You're like your sister's fiancé." "They've been engaged for four years, but he isn't saying anything." "He doesn't, but I know you do!" "But the village..." "What'll people say?" " What do they say?" " What they say?" "They say he'll never marry your sister!" " You must talk to him." " Me?" "I'm a bachelor, like him!" "I understand him." "So what?" "You live in Rome..." "He must understand there's a man in here, or he'll do only as he wishes!" "You'll talk to him!" "Man to man!" "I'll write him a nice letter from Rome." "No?" "All right, I'll talk to him, mom." "Ma', look here." "Is it a bald spot?" "Here." "Some hands you have!" "Mother, you need another radio." "This sucks, must have been Marconi's..." "Why don't you buy her one?" "Virginia!" "What's the name of your girlfriend?" "The one who came last winter." "Who?" "..." "Angela?" "No!" "Angela's engaged." "No, no, no!" "Please, mom!" "Every time I come here you make me meet a girl!" "Last time it was a cross-eyed one!" "Please!" "Anyway, she married the son of the tax collector!" "Briefest engagement!" "God's punishment." "Tax collector..." "This one instead, is a good girl." "Clever." "Her name is..." " She has such a difficult name!" " Even!" " Who're you talking about?" "Catina?" " Yes, Catina." "Is she here?" " Invite her here, tomorrow..." " No Mom!" "We're so well alone, why bring her?" "But son, no strings attached." " Just to chat." " That's all I want, to chat with Catina!" "Nice the spighetta!" "Really smells nice." "What're you doing mom?" " Isn't it too much?" " No, eat, they're good." "I'll eat them all right." "Can't find these in Rome!" " Home made pasta, right?" " No, it's from Rome." " I knew it!" "Well..." "Of course..." "The woman is different in the city." "She's independent." "Because she goes out, she works, goes into offices... factories..." "Contacts are much facilitated." "And so... if it works, fine, if not..." "Bring another one!" "Got it?" "And we're stuck here!" "Wait, don't laugh..." "You must have the knack, though." "You got to use tact, discretion, because every woman, even the loosest, demands respect." "So, the first thing... is to introduce yourself." "It impresses." "It's a guarantee of seriousness." "Like..." "You see a woman coming..." ""Miss, may I?" And then, name and surname." "I always give fake ones, you can never know..." "You then invite her to a bar... to have a drink... and so, between sips, you ask questions." "At first, generic ones." "And then..." "Bang!" "Isn't that Don Santino?" "Hang on a moment." "Damn you, Paolino!" " How're you?" "Fine?" " I'm fine, yes." "I arrived yesterday." "You make me look..." "What have you been up to, all this time?" "What have I done?" "I've worked." "Day in, day out, day in, day out..." "What about getting married?" " Even you?" " What do you mean?" " What's this, an obsession?" " No." " Can't one stay a bachelor?" "!" " A man should..." " Did you get married?" " Me?" "!" "Here's Peppino!" "How's things?" " Loafing, as always?" " And you?" "How come you get a rabbit every time you go hunting?" "Took it from Cipolleta's garden." "See how nice it is?" " You saw your brother-in-law?" " Who?" "Paolo?" "He's there with don Santino." " Oh, he's here?" " Why, you didn't know?" "I'll go change, I'm all dirty." "See you later!" " Say hello to Virginia." " Hey, say hello to Virginia!" "Peppino!" " Hey, Paoli'!" " Peppi'!" "How are you?" "Fine?" " As a poor peasant." " What're you up to?" " Let's have a drink." " I just had one." "Let's go to "Pizzangrillo"." "But like this, just came back from the country." "I can go home and change, and then meet you." "Come on, ceremonies with me?" "Look at me!" "Let's chat a little, Peppi'." "You look good, really good." "Some fun he'll have!" "Wait and see, Paolo will even fix the wedding day!" "I bet that's why he came from Rome." "But it's not fair." "In town he does as he pleases." "Even fake names." "But we live in the country, and must get married!" "What's that got to do?" "When a sister is involved!" "Sure!" "A sister, of course!" "A mother like Mrs. Elvira!" "Look, look!" "Remorse, Peppi'!" ""Remorse That Kills" Seems to be made for me." "I'm fed up, Peppi'!" "Fed up with this irregular life!" "This stupid, empty, boring, bachelor's life!" "But Paolo!" "I can't recognize you anymore!" " Peppi'..." "Think about it." "Peppi', we get old!" " We get old, Peppi!" "I'm 36." "How old are you?" "35?" "34?" " 29." "How, 29?" "29?" "With that moustache..." "So what?" "We're not kids anymore!" "Peppi', we are not kids anymore!" "In short, Peppi'," " I've decided!" " What?" " I've decided to... get married." " You!" " I..." " With whom?" "Well, I don't know." " I must find her." " No kidding!" " I'll find her." "But you've always said marriage was a chain!" "No, I've never said that." "And even if I did, I was wrong." "Now, what matters, is finding a woman." "That's it!" "But you..." "Peppi'..." "You..." " Not because she's my sister..." " Cigarette?" " Yes, thanks." "Now, not because she's my sister..." " Peppi', not because Virginia's my sister..." " Hello Andre'!" " Did it go well?" " Not bad." " One hare and two partridges." " Not because she's my sister..." "But if I too found a woman like Virginia, Peppi':" "With eyes closed!" "Right?" "Yes, but see, it's not about Virginia, it's about marriage in itself." "Obligations, worries..." "and, then, marriage is freedom's grave!" "Freedom?" "What is it?" "Can you tell me what freedom is?" " Come on!" "What is freedom?" " Freedom... freedom... is when does what he wants." "Oh, is freedom to remain alone as dogs?" "To come home and have no one to ask you how you've been, how you feel?" "!" "It's sad getting old." "With the slippers." "With the cough and all, Peppi'!" "I don't want to end up like this!" "What're you doing?" "Coming?" "Let's go!" "So, when will you get married?" "Well, Paoli'?" "Let's do so." "You get married first." "No, you first." "So you can tell me how it feels." "How could it feel?" "Great!" "How else?" "Are we playing odd and even?" "You have a wife, I must yet find her," " it's your turn." " Hi, Peppi'." " Hi, Anni'!" " Who's she?" " Annetta, don't you remember her?" "!" "Annetta?" "That Annetta?" " No way!" "She was like a flower!" " She got married to the town clerk." "Got two kids." " She looks like a tub!" " You see?" " A large tub!" " Another joke of marriage!" "If your wife gets like that, what do you do?" "You keep her!" "Come on!" "It's 1 over 100!" "I know some ladies in their forties..." " They're probably careful, work out..." " Well, make Virginia work out also!" "What?" "I'm going to make Virginia work out?" "!" "Can you imagine Virginia doing push-ups?" "What do you laugh?" "Annetta's like this because she's got a dysfunction." "I'm telling you!" "We almost got engaged, when she was with me, she had a problem." "In short, Peppi'!" "You got a job, a girl, the brother's approval!" "What more do you want?" "All right, but it's not that I don't want to marry Virginia." " I'm sorry, but I want to think about it." " How much longer, it's been 4 years!" "You're right, but, you see, there's lots of small things." " Like what?" " The furniture, for instance." " The furniture?" "I'll take care of that!" " You will?" "I'll take care of it!" "Let's have a soda." "Damn you!" "That's what your problem was?" "Two sodas, quickly!" "What're you doing?" "Trying to be distant with me?" "!" "How's that?" "With everything I've done for Virginia?" "Sheets, mattresses... 12 of everything..." "And now, even the bedroom!" "Mom..." "He had no intention of marrying!" "It was a toil!" "If you knew what I told him!" "And then, better a bedroom than an old maid!" " Okay!" "Now that you've told him!" " No, I assured him!" " I'm going out." " Where're you going?" "You have to meet this Catina, she's a good girl." "And then..." "the bedroom!" "Mom, I'm not getting married!" "No use pressing me." " Trust your mom!" " You must see her, she's cute." " How can you be cute when your name's Catina?" "Tell mother if she isn't cute..." "Catina, Paolo's here!" "He finally came to see us." "He insisted to meet you." "Paolo, you remember Catina?" " Well, no..." " Glad to meet you." "Catina!" "You've become a young lady!" "You had braids, once?" " No." " I never had braids." " You didn't?" " No." "What a..." " And what would Catina be doing?" " She's in the art high-school." "She'll come to Rome for the exams." "To Rome?" "Too bad, you'll be studying in Rome, or we'd have met." " I'll bring the other lamp, so we'll have more light." " Sure, more light..." "Thank you," "I'll go to Rome a month before, so I can prepare myself." "And I also want to visit the museums, the galleries..." " Do you visit them often?" " Every Sunday." " How lucky to be living in Rome..." " Cigarette?" " No, thank you." "Are you familiar with the Vatican Museums?" "By heart..." "Who's your favourite painter?" " Barilla." " Barilla?" "I really can't place him." "What's his century?" " Modern." " Catina..." "I shouldn't say it, but my son has always been very smart!" "Serious, studious..." "True, really a serious young man." "Paolo... did you go to see Jean-Louis Barrault?" " Who?" " Jean-Louis Barrault, de la Comédie Francaise..." "No, I've never left Rome!" " How could I see him?" " But he came to Rome." "Well, when he came, I was gone." "A cake?" "Have a cake." "They're good, you know." "Mother made them, so one has to eat them." "Isn't it so, ma'?" "Have you seen the "Pseudus" at the Ostia Theatre?" "No, I go to Fregene." "What's this, an interrogation?" " Well, it's late, I should be going." " So soon?" " Stay some more." " I can't." " Why're you leaving?" " It's late." " I'll walk you." " No, Paolo will!" " Paolo!" "Go with Catina." " Of course." " Good evening." " Bye, Catina, say hello to your mother." " Bye." "Here." "You want a flower?" "Bye." "That Catina is really a coquette." "Who does she think she is?" "You wanted me to invite her!" "Yes, she's a good girl, but that wiseacre attitude!" "What does she know?" "Paolo knows much more!" "You understand?" "I feel suffocated by this provincial life." "It's too narrow-minded." "It's too miserable." "It's true that..." "I understand you..." "You see, there're no opportunities." "You are out of touch with progress, with art..." "True, provincial life..." "Imagine, when I read they had opened the Flemish exhibition in Rome, believe me, I nearly ran away from home to go and see it!" "Did you see the Flemish?" "Well, no..." "They escaped me, actually..." "That's really a shame." " Here we are." "That's where I live." " Yes?" "Would you come and have a chat with daddy?" "No..." "Bring daddy to Rome..." " We'll all meet in Rome." " We surely will, goodbye." "Goodbye..." "Flemish my foot!" "Fix your teeth, rather!" "Damn!" "Drop dead, you and the Flemish!" "Tickets, gentlemen." " What's this?" " What's the matter?" "Sorry!" " Here." " Thank you." ""I pray to Thee, St. Anthony, To marry, Thou help me!"" "Mother... she's got a fixed idea..." "Even if I wanted to, who to marry?" "Easy for mom to say: "Get married!"" "But where to find a real wife?" "A good, serious, understanding wife?" "Forget it!" "Maybe Carla?" "Yes, among those I know..." "But even her..." "Carla?" "No way!" "What say?" "Carla?" "This the latest model." "Room for vegetables, eggs..." " I'd like a smaller one, miss." " Very well." "This one, then..." "Of course, it doesn't have all the features of the other one..." " This is the '65 model." " I like it." "Does it work with the same kind of power as irons and hot plates?" "Of course, madam." "Well, I'll talk to my husband, he's against this stuff." "Says that cold things are are bad for health." " Your husband isn't all wrong." "Come back with him." " I will." " Goodbye, miss." " Goodbye." " Hi Carla, how're you?" " You take fun in driving customers away?" "She wouldn't have bought anything, cause hubbie doesn't approve." "And they rule." "You've come to offer another great deal?" "No, here is the contract you have to sign and send to Milan." "Listen..." " I haven't come for the contract." " Why then?" "What do you mean why?" "Well..." "Why have I come?" "You have a way to make people feel uncomfortable!" "You always ask precise questions, you never try to understand." "It's not at all easy, what I have to tell you." "Especially for a guy like me." "Let's hear it." "What's so important you've got to tell me?" "Sorry, did I ask a too precise question?" "Carla..." "I'm no longer what I used to be." "I don't even know what's going on." "It's really against my principles, everyone knows." "I was born a bachelor." "But... for some time... all I do is think about you!" "Paolo, sorry, but you just don't know how to say such things!" "It's not like you." "What do you think?" "That I'd believe you, or even fall into your arms?" "!" "Poor Paolo!" "You really don't understand me!" "What's with this "Poor Paolo"?" "Who do you think you are?" "Who cares about you?" "I said it just like that!" "And I've got thousands better than you!" "With that attitude of colonel you've got, which idiot could stay near you?" "If you want to know, I found one!" "I'm engaged!" "And he's much better than you!" "And if he found you here, he would kick you out!" "He's over 6ft tall!" "Of course!" "Only a 6ft tall moron you could have found!" "So, leave!" "What're you waiting for?" "You got thousands?" "Go!" " Sure I'll go!" "Here!" "This is the contract!" "Sign it!" "10%!" "Sorry, but that's all I can do!" "Yes, yes!" "There are thousands!" "All better than her!" "Oh, excuse me!" "Well, not this one..." " "I have a fiancé over 6ft tall!"" " Congratulations!" " Thanks." "But..." "Thousands!" "There are thousands!" "This one, for instance," "Okay, I stop her and say what?" "Ask her to marry me?" "She'll think I'm mad!" "Look at this one!" "She's taller than Carla's fiancé!" "More than 6 feet, she must be 6.5 !" "Well, she's got heels." "So what?" "Even with heels..." "She's quite foxy!" "This honeymoon didn't do you any good." "You get back, you criticize, you say I did nothing, that nothing works without you..." "You could've come back sooner, since you're so smart!" " Have you called me, sir?" " Yes, buy me cigarettes," " I'll be right back." " You're out of cigarettes?" " Here, smoke these." " No, they're too strong." "Riccardo will bring them." "If you wait for Riccardo, you'll give up smoking." "Armando, dear, what's with this tie knots?" "Look how's done, small one..." "Your wife's a good cook, but she doesn't know how to do shirt collars." "Why?" "What's wrong with it?" "Look at it!" "All ruffled up, like an accordion!" "Look at mine." " Well, they do it at the guest house." " No, no... "Fulgor" laundry." "Personally by the manager." "And what a manager, a 23 years old girl!" " Mr. Armando, Ladice on the second line." " Thank you." "There're some invoices for you to sign." "Let's see..." "Invoices..." " Well?" "Isn't that guy coming to pick you up anymore?" " Which one?" " The aviation officer." " Oh, the cadet." "He's a family friend." " So?" "Because he's family friend, he can't be liked by a girl?" "Even had a sword." "Well, I don't like him anyway." "Yet, you should decide." "Marriage is very important for a woman, you know?" "Only for a woman?" "Well, no." "What's that got to do?" "A man always has time." "In fact, a bachelor can become a husband, but then, how can he revert to bachelor?" "If ever, widower." "Sir, how many signatures are you doing?" "Sorry..." "Make another copy." "As serious, she's serious." "Moreover, cute." "Young, well built." "I would almost..." "What say, mom?" " Shall we step down?" " No, we'd better not." "Why?" "I meant..." "So, while you would admire Rome's panorama..." "I'd be admiring you!" " Sir, I didn't know you so gallant!" " No?" "See there was no danger in coming with me?" "That's not why I was saying it!" "It's that mother doesn't know I went out with you, and she worries if I'm late." "Mom, alright." "Let's have a smoke, and then I'll take you to mother." " Thank you." " All right?" " What a nice little car!" " It is." " It's comfortable even in four." " Yes, four are very comfortable, but... it's better in two, isn't it?" "You've even got a radio" "You like it?" "Did you know you can tune in even when driving without looking?" "See?" "Am I looking?" "First, second, first, second..." " Handy!" "The radio is good company." "Yeah, as if you needed a radio to have company!" " But, Elsa, you have a low opinion of me!" " Not at all, quite the opposite." "As boss, we esteem you a lot." "You are kind, understanding..." " and serious." " As your boss?" "And as a man?" " As a man..." " Well?" "It's getting late, please take me home, will you?" "You are wrong about me." " I've straightened up now." " Sure, sure..." " Make yourself at home." " Thank you." "I'll call mother." " No need to bother!" " Not at all." "She'll be happy to meet you." "I've talked so much about you, Mr. Armando, Fornari." "May I?" "Oh!" "Cute!" "Who is it?" "You at a fancy dress party?" " Everyone's fooled!" "It's my mother, when young." " No!" "You're like two peas in a pod!" "But I prefer this one, you know." " Can I ask you for your mother's hand?" " Go ahead, if you don't mind the age." "No, no, such a woman can't grow old." "Such a woman stays..." "Mother!" "Elsa, you came home late today." " Let me introduce you to Mr. Anselmi, my boss." " At last I meet you!" "I'm so pleased by your visit!" "Hey!" "What if the daughter becomes like the mother?" "!" "What do you do if you're married?" "!" "Live with Dr. Jekyll?" "No, I just came to see your daughter home, but now it's late, madam." "So soon?" "Stay some more!" "Just a minute!" "Won't you really have anything?" "Come back another time!" "We'll be delighted!" "Goodbye, sir!" " Hi." " Hi." "Give me "Il Tempo Illustrato"." " Seems there's none left." "I'll check the display." " All right." "No." "This is an old edition." " All gone, dotto'." " No!" "And me who always thought you ended up right here..." "Dotto', you're always joking'!" "Shall I be damned..." " None left, then?" " No." " Bye." " 'Afternoon." "Who knows how much makes a newsstand?" "Marry a newspaper vendor, become a newspaper vendor." "Hello, sir," " Miss Anna!" " Your laundry's ready." " Washed well?" " Sure, as always!" "Hope so, for I have a date with a girl who knows about clean laundry." " More than me?" " Same as you." "Don't worry, you'll look fine!" " Is she beautiful?" " Like you, Miss Anna." "Is she your fiancée?" "Well, not really, but if she wants..." " You didn't ask her yet?" " No." "I'm asking her now." " Careful!" "I might take you seriously." " Anna..." "Haven't you noticed I've been bringing over clean laundry lately?" "Don't I deserve a date?" "Paolo?" "Forgive me for being late, but I went home to tidy up." " What's this dress?" " You like it?" "It's a model!" "They said I'm the only one to have it!" "Of course!" "Who else would wear it?" " Is it a rat?" " Hey, where do you take her?" "Do we go to the "Open Gate"?" " Huh?" " Huh?" " The "Open"?" " They won't let you in." "It's closed, the Open!" "Let's go in here, they've got the TV." " My God, this is a funeral!" " No, no, quiet..." "It's a fashionable cafe!" "Sit here!" "It's so nice." "Waiter?" "Waiter." ""Intermission"" "We apologize with our viewers for this technical breakdown,.." " Yes?" " Waiter, two coffees." "Is that all right?" " Yes." " You know that I was to be an announcer?" " Really?" " I know, I know." " How do you know if I never told you?" "Well, I can imagine it..." "By chance." "Since the TV manager brings his laundry to our shop, he pressed me for an audition!" "Bravo." "Quiet now." "Now let's watch... the..." "TV" "Our game is very simple," "I will mention surnames of celebrated people." "You'll have to say right away their first names." "Let's try an example." "If I asked what is Aligheri's first name, you would answer right away..." " Dante!" "Calm down, keep quiet." "You see?" "!" "It was so easy, yet he didn't know!" "He said it in a low voice, that's how it's done." "Why are you so restless?" "I didn't imagine you being like this." "Calm down!" "Mozart, a great musician, he had two names..." " Two names." "Do you know it, miss?" " Amadeus Wolfgang." " Bravo, miss." "And now..." "Verdi!" " Giuseppe." " Giuseppe." "Very good." "Colleoni?" " Bartolomeo." " Bartolomeo." "That's right." " Petrarca." " What was Petrarca's first name?" "You don't know it either?" "Of course, I know..." "Giovanni." " Giovanni." " Oh, Giovanni..." "I'll help you." "Think about Assisi." "Assisi..." "Giovanni!" " Giovanni!" " Keep silent." "Stay calm." "Keep calm." "Keep calm." " Oh!" "Francesco!" " Francesco!" "Very well!" "Francesco..." "But you told me it was Giovanni!" "His name was Francesco!" "Sure, Francesco is Petrarca's first name." "Giovanni's the waiter." "I was calling him." "Giovanni!" "..." "Waiter!" "Come here!" " How much is it, Giovanni?" " 350." " Let's go." "Let's go, cause I never liked this place, nor will I come again." "Here, 350." "Well..." "She's not bad as wifey..." "Of course, she's no genius..." "But talks too much." "Wants to know who's Petrarca." "What do you care?" " Look how she's dressed..." " Sir?" " Who is it?" "Mr. Armando called." "Says he's stuck at the Register Office." "What do you mean stuck?" "I need the car!" " Well, I know nothing about." " How, you know nothing?" "Sir?" " You know you made a splash on my mother?" " Really?" "Well, she too... struck me..." "Mom, is alway mom, right?" " Send her all my best." " Thank you, sir." " Mom..." "Wow!" "Lucky you!" "Always having fun!" "One in, one out, huh?" "How dare you?" "Who do you think she is?" "You won't tell me that, with those hips, you have serious intentions?" "Did I ask your opinion?" "Shut up!" "Stay in your place!" "Right away!" "Let's keep distances!" "Don't take liberties!" "Some hips..." "It's not her hips that are large." "It's her head that's small." "Lady!" "I'm getting in!" "Excuse me please." "Anna!" "Go forward." "I'll buy the tickets." "Two." "Me and that young lady." "Where you going?" "I'm getting the tickets, why that face?" "Anna?" "Please!" "Let me at least turn around!" "Anna!" " Here!" " Stay there, stay there!" "And I'll stay here." "Jerk!" "Boor!" "I'll teach you to paw me!" "Paolo!" "Paolino!" " Where are you?" " Where is Paolino?" " Paolino!" "Come here!" "Excuse me!" "Hey!" "Where are you off to?" "Madam?" "Quiet, Jolly..." " What's wrong?" " Who knows?" " I found it with a wounded ear." " Poor Jolly!" "I'm off, madam." "I'll send for my luggage tomorrow." "I'm so sorry!" "You really won't come back to Rome?" "Just passing through." "With my new job, I'd better move to Milan." " Good evening, madam." " Hush, Jolly!" "Come in, Mr. Anselmi." "Look who's here..." "Once... we used to meet often..." "True..." "Well, by chance..." "We've met tonight, haven't we?" " Yes!" "For the last time." " She's leaving us, she moves to Milan." "To Milan?" " And you're leaving this place?" " Yes." "Now here, now there." "That's our life." "We can't have a home, nor a family." "Right?" "That's what men think." "And..." "If I come to Milan, I'll look for you." " With chocolates maybe?" " Right, with..." " Goodbye." " Goodbye, dear." " Goodbye..." " Goodbye." "And don't forget about the "California" guesthouse, if you happen to be in Rome." "Rest assured, madam." "I won't forget it." "Salute the Amazon for us!" "Have a nice trip." "Why don't you sit down for a moment?" "Poor girl..." "It hurts seeing people leaving." "Even if you barely know them." "Oh, yes!" "So much light..." "Maybe you didn't notice, but Miss." "Gabriella had set her eyes on you." "Come on..." "We women are never wrong about these things." "Yes, but,.." "she's a modern girl, free, independent..." "I assure you that type thinks about marriage more than all others." "Moreover, you're a serious young man..." " with a position..." " Yes, yes, but..." " I don't fall for it!" " One never knows." "Mr. Primi said he would never get married." "And then, with the first one that came around." "A bad lot..." "Imagine, he met her in a bar." "A streetwalker!" " Moreover.." " Well..." "Girls are all alike." "Capable of anything, so to get married." "Don't you tell me, madam." "I know women..." "It's difficult... finding a serious woman... married... not a girl anymore... who,.." "just because of this, has... no longer vain desires." "Who would give... without demanding." "Jolly is more nervous like usually..." "maybe for the wound." "I'll make it another compress." "I discovered a cut on its ear, and I really don't know how to..." "Excuse me." "If you come near me again, I'll tear your other ear also!" "We suggest the 120L... .. offered by us..." "on advantageous terms..." "Better write:" ""extremely advantageous"" "I lost track." "How did it go?" ""that will be offered by us on extremely advantageous terms"... .. and will be delivered with... .. voltage transformer, neon light, ice basket, egg shelf... .. and mortadella sandwich..." " What?" "Don't write this, but tell Riccardo to stop leaving the mortadella everywhere!" "Greetings, etc..." "Write it down and bring it to me." " Oh, my dear Armando!" " Say!" "Did you answer when Silvana phoned here yesterday?" " Yes." "So?" " So you made me quarrel!" " I?" "!" " Yes, you told her I was gone for an hour, instead of 20 minutes." " She even checks your way home?" " That's not your business!" "Is it my fault?" "!" "You wanted to get married, now enjoy it." "That's all you're able to say!" "Your lifestyle is maybe fun?" "At least I don't fight." "But you not only have trouble at home, you also pour it out on me!" "For five years we always got along." "But since you've got married, you already raised your voice 3 times!" "Yes!" "All right!" "All right!" "Thank God I stopped right in time!" "If I ever again think about getting married... .. I'll chop off my hand!" "You can live without a hand, but with a wife..." " We already are five days late..." " I don't care!" "Let dottor Anselmi sign it" " I'm sorry." " Hi, Armando, I've brought the contract." " Talk to Paolo, I must go." " Miss Alberini." " Show her in," " Hi." " Hello." "How're you?" "To what do we owe this visit?" "I've brought the signed contract." "Thank you." "Take a seat." "You put 12%..." "But why did you bother to come?" "!" "I could've sent Fornari for it." "Why's that?" "Couldn't you have come?" "Well, no..." "After the way you behaved last time it's obvious you don't enjoy my coming there..." "Now it's me who's misbehaving..." "I can't understand why you come saying all those... stupidities." "That you've squared up, that you've become serious..." "You come telling these things to me!" "As if I didn't know you well enough..." "Okay..." "You're right." "You know me too well, you understand my intentions right away." "All right." "I won't tell you such stupidities anymore." "All right?" "Satisfied?" " As you wish." " That's fine." "Now, I have to go." "So soon?" "Well, yes, yes." " I'll see you out, ok?" " No, don't bother." "Bye..." "See you soon." " Sir, do you need me?" " No, you come when I don't call for you." "Here, this is the contract." " Miss." "Carla has left, hasn't she?" " Of course, what else?" "To have stayed?" "But she didn't stay long..." "Well... not long." "At the office..." "Even if she had stayed, what could we have done?" "At the office no, but somewhere else..." "true, sir?" "Somewhere else, of course." "With Carla?" "Do you think I'm getting sentimental over Carla?" "I know her well, you know, after all that happened between us..." "Let's not get into specifics." "I could tell you..." "But it's useless telling you, you're not up to it..." "These are things a little morbid, my dear..." "Oh my God!" " Was it Carla?" "Did she hear?" " Of course, she was there..." " Why tell such things?" " I?" "!" " Yes, you!" " What..?" " How dare you?" "What do you want?" "What're you doing here?" "Go work, get out!" "Out!" "Imbecile!" "Go work!" "She heard..." " Hi." " Hi." " Your daughter?" " Carla's downstairs." "She's crying." " Crying?" "Why?" " I don't know what happened." " She fell, hurt herself?" " No." "She won't tell me." " Must be a blue fit." "You know how girls are..." " Carla!" " I just wanted to say hello..." " Carla!" "Paolo wants to say hello." " Don't call her." "Let her be..." " Go!" " I don't want to bother her, if she's crying..." " It's better." "I'm not intruding?" " No!" "Carla!" "Are you in here?" "Carla!" "It's me." "A colonel that cries!" "Carla, why are you crying?" "I regret what happened, but... .. sometimes we men say things that shouldn't be said..." "It's that... .. we say them just for..." "Is it my fault if that's how I am?" "I am not sentimental, romantic, I am a sensible man..." "I am not one of those sighing under their lover's window, or calling at 2 am saying: "Oh there's the moon and the stars, come down"" "Say something, Carla..." "Please..." "They do sell these refrigerators of mine, don't they?" "It's perfumed..." "Well, you were treating me badly, so I was saying that you..." "I mean..." "that you liked me." "And you couldn't stand me, right?" "You never understood anything about me!" "You mean you don't find me annoying?" "Well, even that fiancée of yours... .. he made me mad... .. you were saying he was better than I, 1.90 m tall..." "What 1.90m?" "!" "I was never engaged!" " What?" "You weren't..." " Leave me alone!" "All right..." "I'll leave you alone..." "I'm going..." "But don't cry..." "What do you care if I cry?" "!" "You aren't sentimental, you aren't one of those who call their girl at 2 am..." " to tell her..." " As for that, no, I don't..." "Even your father told me... .. he said:" ""You talk to her. "" "And I see that's even worse..." "Well..." "Bye." "I'm leaving, then..." "I've left..." "It makes me rage!" "And then, why is she crying?" "If at least she were in love with me..." "One can't marry a woman only because she's in love with him..." "No way!" "And then, what's that got to do?" "If I were also in love..." "Are you in love?" "Are you in love?" "She surely has a..." " Hasn't she?" " You'll see..." " What's he saying?" "We were saying your friend is very talented." " She's a good dancer." " She made a splash everywhere with the way she dances." " Not only for that..." " Do you like her a lot?" "Maybe I'm wrong, but she's putting on quite an act..." "She'll change, and then she'll come at our table." "Who?" "Abbe?" " Didn't I tell you?" " No!" " Carmen met her in Barcelona." " Really?" "That's the kind of thing I set up..." " Like the last time..." " Why, didn't you have fun?" "Well, no..." " You weren't there..." " Stop being formal!" "Yes?" "Good idea, we've met since two hours already." " She knows some pretty dirty jokes..." " Cut it out!" "Shall we dance, Carmen?" " He's cute, Camillo, isn't he?" " Yes, but sometimes he exaggerates." "No... are you offended?" "No, but saying I'm telling dirty jokes, that's not nice, is it?" "He's joking!" "You know Camillo..." "Here she is!" "Cami'!" "Cami'!" "Cami'..." "Abbe..." " What do you want?" " She's come!" "Enchanted..." " Why, can't I say it?" " Are you mad?" "Why?" "Is she offended?" "Poquito tired?" " No, no..." "Not at all tired." " At all?" " I don't like when sit down." " Me neither." "I like standing." " Go dance!" " No, no..." " My friend is a very good dancer." " He's joking..." " Come on..." " I can't..." " It's a slow dance..." " Yes..." "Take a dive..." " I'm taking a dive..." " No, no, no..." " No?" " Easy..." "Mire..." "I've got it..." "Modern boogie..." "I got it." " Thank you..." " No, no, no!" "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." " You excuse me." " It's time for me to change." "May I?" "Hello!" "Carla?" "It's me, Paolo." "Do you mind?" "It's 2 am." "It's true." "It rains..." "Yes." "Yes." "Yes." "Yes." "Miss Carla Alberini do you take Mr Paolo Anselmi, here present, for your husband... according to the rite of Holy Mother Church?" "Yes." " THE END "