"You'll feel better now" "What am I going to do?" "Tommaso Garani, room 103" "My 'phone is out of order." "I wonder if you could..." "Could you tell the operator?" "He's awake, but drugged with morphine" " Will you operate?" " No, it would be futile" "Tommaso, are we disturbing you?" "Come in, my dears" "Operation successful, but the patient died" "Sit down" "I see there's a party to launch your book today" " Let's not talk about it" " Why not?" "Your book is the one thing that really matters" "Lidia, why don't you sit down?" "Smoke if you like" "I don't feel tired" "Here's the magazine with your article on Adorno" "What's your opinion?" "Shall I include it in my book?" "Yes, it's very good." "Your book will be excellent" "I'll have to give it more thought" "I haven't been able to think these last few days yet this is my first free time in years" "What an ironical holiday" "Lidia, you look wonderful" " I told Marcella not to come" " Quite right" "I'd rather not see anyone" "I'm sick and tired of all the pretending" "But I was hoping you would come, of course" "You know, I see things in a clearer light now" "I regret that my presence spoiled so many evenings in your delightful home" "It's your home, too, you know" "You appreciate many things when you're all alone" "You realize that so much remains to be done" "I wonder if I've ever done anything really useful" "I lacked the courage to probe deeply" "Probably I never had enough intelligence, anyway" "If that's true, I'd better pack up writing at once" "You're joking" "Occasional self-criticism helps to raise morale" "You bought it?" "I was going to bring you a copy" "I've not only bought it, I've begun to read it" "Fifty pages so far" "I hope I'll finish it" "The bath episode is exceptional" "Unless morphine has warped my judgement, it's your best" "With morphine things seem different" "It must be the morphine." "Do you really like the book?" "I do" "You'll end up a great success" "Yes, I'll come to a bad end" "The advantage of premature death:" "you escape success" "My mother" "How are you, Tommaso?" "Poor Mother, seven hours on a train just to sit here" "This is Saturday, isn't it?" "Who have you seen lately?" "Hardly anyone." "We haven't done much lately" "We don't get out much, except to drive around" "What about your trip to Greece?" " We haven't decided" " Get well; it was your idea" "Don't treat me as a patient;" "I know how this will end" "Sorry" "My publisher will dispose of my royalties." "This must be paid for" "It's nothing..." "I'm sorry..." "Don't tire yourself." "Should we go?" "No, please stay" "Quite a place, isn't it?" "Appalling style, but I never expected to end in such luxury" "I feel a bit of a fraud" "Hospitals are getting more like night clubs" "People want a good time to the end" "You know, in such cases one craves champagne" "I don't like it, but I've developed a passion for it" "They weren't surprised" "It's stimulating; it's good for you" "Excuse me, I've never dared to ask your name" "My name is Elena" "Will you have a drink with us?" "No, thank you." "Don't tire yourself with talking" "She's not a nurse; just a beauty to boost morale" "Yet beauty is depressing in certain circumstances" "Giovanni, will you pour?" "Only for me?" "What about Lidia?" "No, thanks, Tommaso." "I'd rather not" "Giovanni, don't let me drink alone." "You, too, mother" "I have to go, Tommaso." "You stay, Giovanni" "I have to go." "I'll come again tomorrow" " Don't you want to go, too?" " I'll stay a little longer" "Goodbye." "See you soon." "Tomorrow" "They are my only real friends, mother;" "others are just acquaintances" "They're good people." "Giovanni's a writer, famous, too" "If they ever visit you one day..." "You must go there ...give them the room overlooking the orchard" "If that's your wish, I promise we'll go" "I think they are using water, not morphine" " How was that concert?" " I didn't go" "Have you a match?" "No, a match" "Get up, please" "I could do without this book party" " Are you too tired to go?" " No, I'm fine" "Well, a little tired, perhaps" "I must tell you something unpleasant" "Must you?" "Yes." "It happened at the hospital." "Very unpleasant" "I saw that girl again" " Which girl?" " The one in the corridor" "At first I couldn't make out what she wanted" "You went into her room" "She was like a wild animal." "I was carried away" "Why was it "unpleasant"?" "It was hideous." "At first I thought I'd provoked it." "The nurses came in" "Good story material." "Call it "The Living and the Dead"" " Is that your only comment?" " What else?" "That you did something vile?" "You disgust me?" "No, I understand." "You were taken by surprise." "Let's forget it" "Perhaps she's the lucky one" "Why?" "She's uncontrollable" "This is the ante-room of fame;" "we all wait here" "Please sign a copy for our Nobel Prize winner" "I see you sign on the left" " Do you prefer the left?" " Probably" "Very interesting; you could have a great future" " Now one for my collection" " For you: "In friendship"" " What are you writing now?" " Nothing" "How I'd love to write a book" " Going away this weekend?" " No, I'm too busy" "We'll talk later." "Regards to Lidia" "Isn't my wife back?" "Hasn't she 'phoned?" " Shall I serve dinner?" " No, you can go." "I'll wait" "Wait here" "Stop it!" "Stop it!" "Wait" "Do you still want me to wait?" "The wind's strong up there" " Have you seen Lidia?" " No, I thought you were out" "I'm fed up." "Paolo has a cold;" "we can't leave town" "Ask Lidia to call round" "She's not at home." "I thought she might be with you" "No, I haven't seen her for days" "It's you." "Where are you?" "I'm in Sesto San Giovanni" "In the same old field kids are still firing rockets;" "you'll like it" "They shoot up ever so high" "No, don't worry." "Nothing's wrong" "Nothing, I tell you" "Come and pick me up, will you?" "Hurry" "If you're meeting someone, there's a little hotel nearby" "Why come here?" "I just happened to come this way" "It hasn't changed at all" "It will before long" "They were over there, the boys with rockets" "This line was in use when we lived here" "Why have you moved the sponge?" "I'm tired of staying in" " Let's go to that party" " Anywhere to get out" " Why did they invite us?" " Gherardini has a reason" " Will there be many guests?" " I suppose so" "Millionaires collect intellectuals;" "he's picked you" "A new dress?" "Let's not go to Gherardini's party" "I'd rather we went somewhere by ourselves" "If you like" "What's up?" " Watching you amuses me" " What's so amusing?" "I don't know." "Sometimes you seem to present a front to me" "Nonsense." "Look at her; she's not bad" "Remember?" "You're really trying to distract my attention" "Don't belittle me always." "I can have my own thoughts" "What now?" "I haven't a thought now..." "but I'm expecting one" "I can feel it coming" "Here" "Did the thought come?" "Is it a nice thought?" "Tell me" "Why not?" "Where's Gherardini's villa?" "In Brianza; about half an hour's drive" "Life would be tolerably agreeable if it were not for its amusements" "An inspiration?" "I no longer have inspirations, only recollections" "Won't you tell me your thought?" "Later." "Well, shall we go to the Gherardinis?" "Why have you changed your mind?" "I don't know; one must do something" " Are they all dead?" " Let's hope so" "Who here would read "The Sleepwalkers"?" "Pontano, isn't it?" "So nice of you to come." "I've heard so much about you" "We're celebrating the horse's first victory" "My daughter's horse" " What's his name?" " Volfango." "He's so good" "From your books I expected you to be old and grey" "You've read them?" "Do I look too inane?" "Come, I'll introduce you" "Let us introduce ourselves as we meet people" "Hello, Berenice" "Lidia and I have hated each other from the cradle" "Pontano, we meet at last" "Antonio, put him to bed" " No, he's so sweet" " Not if he doesn't sleep" "But it's his party, after all" "Put him to bed." "This lot will teach him bad habits" "Don't stare so;" "I know I show signs of wear and tear" "You've improved a lot, you know" "You were so plain." "Shouldn't I have said that?" "I've heard it many times" "You behave like a tart" "Are you married?" "I live all alone." "I was born to be alone" "I'm too sensitive - as my dentist used to say" "Do you still hang around with intellectuals?" "I never see you anywhere" "We don't go out much." "Tonight is an exception" "How beautiful the pool looks" "Remember Grimaldi?" "I still see her" "Please..." "let's forget the past" "There are three thousand roses here;" "what a hue they take on at night" " Do roses sleep?" " Yes, all night long" "Isn't that a beauty?" "It just awoke" "Tell Filippo to arrange them;" "everyone else makes them look funereal" "Look who's arrived" " Haven't we met before?" " Yes, but I can't place it" "Aren't you enjoying yourself?" " Should I jump into the pool?" " Naked or dressed?" "I've heard so many good things about you" " Who designed this place?" " Vietti" "Cesarino!" "Show this gentleman around" "I'm going to Sweden." "On my boat, of course" "He's awfully rich; he owes millions" "Roberto's just arrived." "Shall I introduce you?" "He's a remarkable man." "I'll go and get him" "Stop sending me postcards;" "I'm green with envy" " I've only just got back" " From your holiday?" " It was a business trip" " I bet!" "Why, Marchesa Gentili, from Rome" "This lady does so much for orphanages, Signor Pontano" "I will have one." "Everyone smokes here in Milan" "Signorina Resy." "Please join us" "Giovanni Pontano?" "The author of that great book?" "One of the best books ever written" "I adore it, I really do." "I'm your greatest admirer in Italy" "You must allow me that privilege" "I'd like a novel about a woman who loves a man but the man doesn't love her" "But he does admire her intelligence, her character" "They live together... but how could such a story end?" "In so many ways" "She'd have to be strong and sacrifice herself" "She sacrifices herself for another woman's happiness" "Why does she sacrifice herself?" "I don't know." "It makes me want to cry" "What are you doing here?" "Why not mix with the others?" "Yes, I will in a moment" "Do you find it interesting here?" "So-so." "Why is it you never seem to enjoy yourself?" "I am enjoying myself" "There's a girl in there enjoying herself alone, too" "She's the one reading "The Sleepwalkers"" "She's pretty, too" " Everything all right, Pontano?" " I'm afraid I know no one" "It's absurd to condemn wealth." "No one's wealthy now" "But if anyone is still thinking of becoming rich my advice is: don't let money obsess you" "I've always looked upon my businesses as works of art" "Their financial profit was almost immaterial" "The important thing is to create something lasting" "But not everyone can create something lasting" "The thing that sustains a writer, like you, Pontano is a sense of necessity, not a need for profit" "You write because it's necessary for you and others" " But one has to live" " I never worried about that" "Life is what you make of it with your own resources" "What would you do if you couldn't write?" "I think he'd commit suicide" "I don't feel that important" "Perhaps there are other ways" "Isn't writing an irrepressible but antiquated instinct?" "A lonely craftsman putting one word after another" "The job can't be mechanized" "Do you believe all that?" "No." "But you have the advantage of real people you create real houses, real cities" "The rhythm of life, the future, is in your hands" "This is a black day for my husband" "You're right" "Are you one of the many worrying about the future?" "I'm building my own, although the present keeps me busy" "Probably the future will never come" "The future will be awful, don't you think?" "By the way, why not stay here tonight?" "Darling, you're always interrupting me" "Carry on." "You were saying the future may never come" "Who knows what the future holds?" "Our privileges will vanish." "A good thing, too" "When I was young I imagined a world like this and set out to create such a future" "Would you like a drink?" "He's been staring at that statue all night" "Who knows what the animal is thinking?" "Maybe he expects it to wake up" "Cats are strange" "Go away, Resy." "Leave me alone" "Can't you find someone to play with me?" " Won't I do?" " No." "Too old" " I'll be younger if I play with you" " I don't want that" "I'd have won." "The compact must stop on the last row" "What's the prize?" "You make a wish and tell it if you win" "My name is Valentina" "Do you often lose this game?" "I've just invented it" " Once I lost everything" " What game was that?" "The first with seven points is the winner" "Frankly, I came here to talk to you" "Too ruthless" "I'm scared" "That was not ruthless enough" "One for me" "One of the stones has fallen out" "It can't have gone far, can it?" "Maybe it rolled into the garden" "Never mind, it was only a ruby" "Do you enjoy acting the cynic?" "Fifteen thousand on Valentina" "Twenty thousand on Pontano" " Sixty thousand on Pontano" " Come, now, you can't be serious" "You only worry about losers" "A typical intellectual." "Egoistic, but compassionate" "This isn't a racetrack and don't take me for a horse" "Is there a friskier horse?" "I wish to enquire about Signor Garani." "Room 103" "When?" "Ten minutes ago?" "Was his mother with him?" "I'm rather disappointed" "In me?" "How can I put that right?" "Shall we read a few pages together?" "That would be one way of becoming closer" " Are you craving affection?" " Aren't you?" "I withdrew from the game;" "you must claim your prize" "Let me savour it a little longer" "But don't forget" "My memory seems to get worse every day" "Good night, Daddy" "I'd like a word" "Pontano, I've got a proposition for you." "I could use a man like you" "I'm running a cultural programme for my employees" "I want better contact between workers and management" "You know why?" "They don't know the firm's history and my part in it" "I want a press and public relations department with a special section devoted to internal relations" " I want our company's history written" " By me?" "Yes, but as an executive" " A full-time job?" " That's right" "Wouldn't you like an executive position?" "May I ask what you earn?" "Your wife's family is rich, I believe" "True, but I have my own money, and I contribute to many publications" "Wouldn't you like to be independent?" "In what way?" "Think it over." "It's our policy to pay top salaries" "Look what my cousin brought me from America" "A wallet, with a dollar inside" "You see, the dollar gets everywhere" "All alone, Signora Pontano?" "Isn't it beautiful here?" " Where are you going?" " I won't be long" "Have you seen Signorina Gherardini?" "Shall we dance?" "You can't dance" "Don't play about" "Where are we going?" "Wait a moment." "Let's talk." "Tell me something" "I'll tell you a bedtime story later" "Pretend I'm in bed" "No, later." "I'll tell you about a hermit - intellectual, of course" "He drank only dew, until he came to the city tasted wine and become an alcoholic." "How's that?" "I'd like a true story about you" " Worse has happened to me" " I wish I could understand a writer" " I've forgotten your name" " Friends call me Resy" " You want to understand writers only?" " No, others, too" "I think you'll have your hands full" "I'm sorry, I can't" "At least I'm clever enough not to break up a marriage" "Now spend the rest of the evening with your wife" "But it was she who sent me to you" "Never mind." "It's my prize of your game" "It's so dark." "How can I find her?" "I felt miserable this evening but our game cheered me up" "Now the misery is creeping back, like a melancholy dog" " Have you got a cigarette?" " No, I smoke cigars" "I'll get my own" "Bring more candles" "I think we still have some things to say" "Of course" "I think that love restricts a person" "It creates misunderstanding all around" "But not within." "Even novels are sentimental now" "I see; you're gathering material tonight" "The way I feel, I don't know if I'll ever write again" "I know what to write, but not how to write it" "It's called a crisis; very common among writers today" "But in my case it's affecting my whole life" "You're just weak, like me" "Why tell me?" "I may not understand" "My hobbies are golf, tennis cars and parties" "Is that all in life?" "Don't you like other things, too?" "Yes." "Everything" "Promise not to make fun of me?" "I heard snatches of television dialogue:" ""Stop that car!" "I wouldn't do that, Jim"" "After that, the howling of a dog rising effortlessly, in perfect misery" "Then I thought I heard a 'plane" "Then silence... and I was happy" "A garden's silence is made of sounds;" "press your ear to a tree and listen" "The sounds may be within us;" "I'd rather think it's the tree" "The silence is broken by an alien noise disturbing my peace" "I close the window, but the noise persists; it's too much for me" "I don't want useless sounds;" "I want to select them" "Voices and words... there are so many words I'd rather not hear but you must resign yourself, like floating on the waves of the sea" "May I hear it again?" "I've erased it." "It was drivel." "I don't take my writing very seriously" "Mother says scribbling indoors ruins the complexion" "It's a sin to waste such intelligence" "I'm not intelligent;" "I'm alert" "I'm happy to observe things without having to write" "I went to the States to see Julia" " Who's Julia?" " A hurricane" "We may meet more often, Valentina." "Your father has offered me a job" "Last year I thought I was in love with a boy..." "Something must be wrong with me, but it will pass" "Whenever I try to communicate..." "love disappears" "Was that when you lost everything?" "Why work for my father?" "Surely you don't need money" "No?" "What you need is a girl, for a fresh start" "Not a girl" "You" " Don't be afraid" " I'm not" "You see?" "It's ridiculous" "How can he sleep?" "Anything might happen" " Nothing ever happens" " Yes, but I hate seeing time wasted" "You'll give me a heart attack" "Come to my room and dry yourself" "How prosaic." "Sandwiches at this hour d'Annunzio's turtle died of colic after eating flowers" "It's true, but you don't believe me" "I'll get a towel" "You should take your dress off" "Listen, Valentina... isn't that your name?" "Stop fussing over me; tell me what you have in mind?" "Please don't spare my feelings" "I'm sure that's not in your nature" "I've nothing in mind." "Dry yourself or stay wet, but don't go on about it" "Isn't our writer drinking?" "One day, in Venice I was dining with that American author..." " The one who hunts elephants" " Hemingway?" "There's a man for you." "A real artist" "I said to him: "Dear Hemingway, I like you" ""One of these days I'll visit you in Cuba"" "Do you know what he replied?" ""If you do, I'll shoot you"" "There's a man who knows his business" "Earns what he likes." "Millions of dollars" "Even an intellectual can't scorn that" "It's hard to say what an intellectual might scorn" "My boy, never despise money" "Our time, sir is vile and anti-philosophical, afraid to take a stand on values" "As for democracy, in a nutshell, it means: take things as they come" "I respect that quotation, but it's offensive here" "He spoke it complacently, but in despair" "It's the words that count, not the author's intentions" " Shall I tell you what happened?" " Skip it" "Fine." "I'm not much good at confessions" "I wonder what I am good at?" "Not a love, it escapes me" "I've plenty of vices, but I hardly practise them" "I don't even like whisky" "I think I've found the vice that suits me; it's warm and good" "How old are you?" "Eighteen... plus many, many months" "You don't know what it is to feel the weight of years, in vain" "I just feel like dying" "An end to this agony, something new" " It may be nothing" " Yes, it may be nothing" "Let's go" "I don't feel a bit jealous, in spite of what I said" "Not a bit" "That's the trouble" "I hope we'll see you again" " Perhaps you'll invite me over?" " In September, after your holiday" "This year I won't be back until later..." "much later" "You've exhausted me, the pair of you" "Shall we go this way?" "Take no notice." "I'm just crying because I'm silly" "Let's not go home just yet" "Want to hear a good one?" "Gherardini offered me a job" " Will you accept it?" " I don't think so" "Why not?" "It's a good opportunity." "Your life would be your own at last" "I 'phoned the clinic." "Tommaso is dead" "When?" "Why didn't you tell me?" "You were playing." "Was he really your good friend?" "He was much more to me" "He convinced me, despite myself, that I was more clever than I am" "He spent days trying to make me study even though I wasn't interested;" "I was concerned with my problems" "His persistence nearly drove me mad" "I began to hate him for it" "He never talked about himself." "Only me... me..." "And I never understood" "I thought so little of myself" "When we're young, we're so stupid, we can't imagine things coming to an end" "You talked only about yourself" "That was something new for me, I was so happy with it that nothing in the world was more beautiful" "Because I loved you." "You, not him" "That's why his affection irritated me and flattered you" "Isn't that true?" "Yes, but not much." "He was so vulnerable." "I feel like dying because I no longer love you" "That's why I'm desperate" "I wish I were old, my life's dedication to you over" "I wish I no longer existed, because I can't love you" "That's the thought which came to me in the night club, when you were so bored" "But if this is true, if you feel like dying it means you still love me" "No, it's only pity" "I never gave you anything." "I was completely unaware" "I go on wasting my life, like a fool taking without giving, or giving too little" "If you mean I haven't much to give, you may be right" "I used to spend afternoons reading in bed" "Tommaso would call and find me there" "He could have taken me;" "I wouldn't have resisted, out of boredom" "But he was satisfied to watch me as I read" "All those purposeless books" "Two hundred pages a day;" "I read so quickly" "I've been selfish" "Now I realize that what we give others comes back to us" "Do they think their music will improve the day?" "Lidia, let's settle this" "Let's try to hang on to something we're sure of" "I love you" "I'm sure I'm still in love with you." "What more can I say?" "Let's go home" "When I awoke this morning you were still asleep" "As I awoke I heard your gentle breathing" "I saw your closed eyes, beneath wisps of stray hair and I was deeply moved" "I wanted to cry out, to wake you, but you slept so deeply, so soundly" "In the half light your skin glowed with life so warm and sweet I wanted to kiss it, but I was afraid to wake you" "I was afraid of you awake in my arms again" "Instead, I wanted something no one could take from me, mine alone this eternal image of you" "Beyond your face I saw a pure, beautiful vision showing us in the perspective of my whole life all the years to come, even all the years past" "That was the most miraculous thing:" "to feel, for the first time, that you had always been mine" "That this night would go on for ever united with your warmth, your thought, your will" "At that moment I realized how much I loved you, Lidia" "I wept with the intensity of the emotion" "For I felt that this must never end we would remain like this all our lives not only close, but belonging to each other in a way that nothing could ever destroy except the apathy of habit, the only threat" "Then you wakened and, smiling, put your arms around me, kissed me and I felt there was nothing to fear" "We would always be as we were of that moment bound by stronger ties than time and habit" "Who wrote that?" "You did" "No..." "I don't love you any more" "You don't love me, either" "Say it" "No, I won't say it"