"Hello" "Yeah" "What?" "!" "Sir kindly switch off your mobile phone" "Just one sec one sec please!" "excuse me!" "Sir please sit down!" "Captain, there is a medical emergency" "A passenger has just fallen down on the aisle" "Delhi Air India 11 returning due to a medical emergency" "Sir!" "Excuse me sir!" "Excuse me sir!" "One minute!" "I'm alright now" "Thank you!" "You all go now" "I'll go now" "Gentleman wait!" "Get the car" "Are you Mr. Dillon?" "Why?" "Should i tatoo my name here?" "Take out the car fast!" "Ok sir!" "Come sir" "Should go to hotel right sir?" "Yeah yeah we'll go to the hotel" "But go through Vasant Vihar.. take me there" "Put some load on accelerator kaake!" "Ya Farhan tell me" "You come out fast I'm reachin your place in 5 minutes!" "What happened dude?" "Chathur had called" "Remember him?" "Who "Silencer"?" "ya ya" "He's saying Rancho is coming" "What are you saying?" "He's saying if you wanna meet Rancho come to the campus at 8, on the tank" "Oh shucks" "Hey you come out fast" "Ya ok ok" "Shruthi I'll be back in sometime" "Oooo shoes...." "Hey I got my friend back" "What?" "Hey I'll come back and speak to you!" "At least wear pants and go!" "Now can we go to the hotel sir?" "We'll go to the hotel kaake but only after going to "Imperial College of Engineering"" "Ok sir!" "I forgot to take socks dude!" "You're talkin about socks?" "Hey look down even pants you forgot!" "Now you can go to hotel!" "But only after goin to airport because my brother is coming there take him to hotel." "Same surname "Dillon"" "I'm Dillon!" "Where the hell have you sent the taxi?" "Is it on the runway?" "Oye Rancho?" "Hey Chathur where is Rancho?" "Rancho?" "!" "Where is Rancho?" "Welcome idiots" "Wanna drink madiera(RUM)?" "This is that rum you all used to drink here?" "Have a drink" "Hey where is Rancho?" "I'll tell you" "First look at this" "Not my wife..." "look at the bunglow behind idiots: 3.5 million" "Swiming pool - heated!" "Living room - maple wood flooring" "My new Lamborghini 6496cc - very fast!" "Hey why are you showing all this to us?" "You forgot?" "What is this?" "5th september..today's date..then what yaar?" "!" "Come bet... after 10 years we'll come back over here itself, on this same day and we'll see who is more successful!" "Do you dare?" "........." "Tell, will you come?" "...." "Will you come?" "Remember something now?" "Here only i kept bet with that idiot" "I kept my promise" "I'm back he he" "Stupid" "I left my flight and came" "He left his pant and came just to meet Rancho" "From five years we're searching for him." "We don't know if he's dead or alive or what do you think?" "Will he come for this stupid bet" "He won't come I know he won't come he he eh" "What?" "Will you break his teeth or I'll do it!" "One minute Farhan one minute" "Idiot.. then why did you call us over here?" "To meet Rancho" "Come and see where he stayed back and where I reached!" "Means that you know where is Rancho?" "aah?" "Yes" "Where is Rancho?" "He is in Simla!" "#.....he was like a fleeting wind.....# #....." "like a flutterting kite.....# #.....where did he go?" "lets find him.....#" "#.....he was like a fleeting wind.....# #....." "like a flutterting kite.....# #.....where did he go?" "lets find him.....# #.....while confined channel guided us.....# #.....he would define his pathways.....# #.....and loiter along them merrily.....#" "#.....while our future haunted us.....# #.....he would celebrate the present.....# #.....and live every moment with reckless freedom .....#" "#.....where did he come from?" ".....# #....touching our hearts .....# #.....where did he go?" "lets find him.....#" "#.....he was like a shade in sweltering heat .....# #....." "like village in desert .....# #.....he was like salve for our distress .....# #.....while we cowered from challenges .....# #.....he would dive in seas .....#" "#.....and swim against the rip currents .....# #.....he was a wandering cloud .....# #.....he was our pal .....# #.....where did he go?" "lets find him.....#" "Rancho!" "Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad" "How different his name was?" "That same different thoughts" "Since childhood we heard that life is like a race...." "If you dont run fast others will overtake you..." "Damn!" "To take birth... had to race among 300 million sperms he he eh" "I was born at 5.15am" "And at 5.16am my dad said" ""My son will become engineer!"" ""Farhan Qureshi!" "B.Tech engineer"" "And my fate was sealed!" "What did I want to become?" "Nobody asked me though." "Raju Rastogi" "Rancchoddas Chanchad" "Tell me your room number!" "D26" "Follow me" "I'm Manmohan" "M.M" "All these enginneers call me milli meter" "Milk, egg, bread, wash clothes, iron clothes, filling journals, copying assignment" "Let it be any work tell me!" "Fixed rate no bargain!" "One minute, one minute, hold this, hold!" "This is kilo byte" "This is mega byte, and this is his mother giga byte." "Take their pictures... this family doesn't byte [bite]" "[Raju praying]" "Here comes one more big believer!" "Hi, Farhan Qureshi..." "I'm Raju Rastogi" "Don't worry" "After you stay here for a while, your belief in God will vanish eventually" "Only posters of naked girls stuck by your side.. and you'll say" "Oh God" "Get me one!" "Hey get out of here!" "Out out" "Give 4 rupees 2 rupees per bag" "Here 5 rupees..." "Keep the change" "Wow sir you gave me a tip" "Even i'll give you a tip" "Tonight.... wear underwear which doesn't have hole!" "Why?" "Oh Emperor....." "You are great....." "Accept our gift" "Aaahh" "This is he-man, he-man take this..." "Ooohhhoo white white white" "We were humiliated," "Hands saluting," "Heads down like slaves," "When we saw Rancho for the first time!" "New gift..gift gift gift gift!" "Namaste sir!" "Remove your pants and get sealed!" "What's ur name?" "Tell" "Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad!" "Huuii hhehehhee" "Listen brothers learn by-heart!" "By final year you'll learn!" "hmmm" "Remove ur pants.... remove pant" "Oooh so you wont listen like this hanh?" "Don't wear wet pant kid." "Come, remove now!" "Aal iz well, aal iz well" "What is he saying?" "Someone make him understand!" "Hey james bond!" "Make him understand!" "Take off your pants of they're gonna piss on you" "Oye English!" "Feeling shy to speak in hindi huh?" "Sorry sir i was born in Uganda, and studied in Pondicherry" "So little slow in Hindi" "So slowly make him understand!" "Who is in a hurry here?" "Worn again huh?" "Take off your pants or.. they're gonna piss on you" "He is saying piss as "muthravisarjan"?" "Hahahha!" "Ooo here come pandit learning engineering" "Hey come out you idiot!" "Come out" "Come out or else I'll piss on your door!" "I'll count to 10" "If you don't come out" "I'll piss on your door for the whole semester" "Salt water is a great conductor of electricity 8th standard physics" "We all studied it;" "He applied it!" "I.C.E.'s director's name was Dr.Viru Sahastrabudhhe" "But everyone calls him "Virus"" "Everyone called him computer virus!" "Oye Virus is coming..carrying eggs with him" "He has told first years to come down come." "Fast, fast!" "Virus was the most competetive man we had ever seen" "If someone overtakes him even one step" "He couldn't accept it.." "To save time he used velcro instead of buttons and a hook in tie!" "He has trained his mind so that he can write using both his hands at the same time" "Everday at 2pm he used to take a power nap of exactly 7.5 minutes and used to listen opera" "Govind had to do all unproductive works like shaving and cutting nails in this 7.5 mins" "What is this?" "Sir, nest" "Whose?" "Cuckoo bird's nest" "Cuckoo bird never builds their nest" "They lay their eggs on other birds nest and when their babies come to the world, what do they do first?" "They kick out other eggs from the nest competition over the life begins with murder that's nature..." "Compete or die!" "You all are also like the cuckoo birds" "and these are those eggs whom you kicked out and reached I.C.E." "Don't forget because every year, 4 lakh (400,000) applications comes to I.C.E." "among them only 200 will be selected you and these finished broken eggs!" "My own son applied for 3 years rejected everytime" "remember life is a race!" "If you don't run fast someone will beat you and move faster than you" "Let me tell you very interesting story" "This is an astronaut's pen" "In space, foundain pen, ball pen cannot be used" "So after spending millions of dollars" "Scientists invented this pen" "From this you can write in any angle, any temperature, zero gravity" "One day when I was a student the director of our institute called me" "He said "Viru Sahastrabudhhe"." "I said "Yes sir"" ""Come here!" I got scared" "He showed me this pen he said this is a symbol of excellence" ""I give it to you and the day when you get a extraordinary student like you pass this pen to him"" "For 32 years, Viru Sahastrabudhhe is waiting for the next Viru Sahastrabudhhe" "Is there anyone here in this batch to honour this pen?" "Good, hands down" "Should I write on the notice board?" "I said put down your hands" "Sir I have a question sir" "Sir, if in space fountain pen ball pen cannot be used, why didn't astronauts try using a pencil in space sir?" "it could've saved millions of dollars" "...I will get back to you on this" "That fellow in night kicks seniors and during the day he's irritating the director, I'm telling you if we stay with him, he will get us in trouble!" "Buddy, you screwed virus completely" "Oh emperor, you're great.." "Accept our gift...." "Get lost, dont you've school?" "Who'll pay the fees?" "Your father?" "You calling my father?" "Hey stop stop Raju!" "What are you doin?" "Hey listen!" "No fee is required for schooling!" "Uniform is required, uniform" "Whichever school you like, go get the uniform of that school go sit in the class" "Who'll come to know when there is a huge population?" "If I get caught?" "If they catch you, then change uniforms, and change school!" "There was really something special about him," "He always used to challenge everything in the world." "Each and every move." "He was the only one free bird in Virus's nest" "We all were just robots operated by professors' remote control" "But he was the only one perhaps not a machine!" "What is a machine?" "Why are you smiling?" "Um.. actually sir from my childhood I used to dream of studying in an engineering college" "Today I'm sitting over here, feeling excited sir!" "No need to be so overexcited.." "Tell, tell me the definition of a machine" "Umm.." "Sir" "Machine is anything that reduces human effort sir" "Will you please elaborate...?" "Sir umm..." "All those things which makes the work for humans easier are machines sir" "Feeling hot!" "press button, wind blowing, FAN is a machine sir!" "You can talk to your friend miles away.." "TELEPHONE is machine sir!" "Calculate crores (10,000,000) in less time..." "CALCULATOR is a machine sir" "Sir, actually we are dependent in the world for machine sir" "From PEN NIB to PANTS ZIP... all machines sir!" "One second up, one second down; up, down, up, down, up" "Tell me the definition!" "Sir thats what I'm saying sir" "Will you write all this in the exam huh?" ""This is a machine up, down, up, down, up"?" "IDIOT!" "Anybody else?" "Wow great !" "Perfect !" "Great please sit down" "Thank you, thank you" "But sir even I said the same in simple language" "If you like simple language you can go join some other arts n commerce college" "But sir.. we should understand it at least" "Like this way mugging up from book, what's the use sir?" "Oh you know more than books?" "Books have the same definition..." "And if you wanna pass, you'll write this itself" "But sir, there are other books also" "Get out!" "Oh, why?" "In simple language - please go outside" "IDIOT!" "So we were discussing about the machines" "Hey why did you come back?" "I forgot something sir" "What?" "Instruments that record, analyse, summarize, organize, debate and explain information" "That are elastative, non-elastative hard bound, paper back, jacketed and non-jacketed with forward introduction, table of contents, index that are intented for the enlightment understanding enhancement and education human brains of sense in root of vision.." "sometimes touch" "What are you trying to say?" "Books sir, books" "I forgot my books sir." "Can I take them?" "Couldn't you say in simple way?" "I tried sometime before, but you didn't like it in simple way sir" "Professors used to keep Rancho outside more often than inside classrooms" "If he get kicked from one class, he'd go sit in another classroom" "Rancho used to say that knowledge is increasing everywhere - where ever you get, gain it!" "He was completely different from all of us" "We used to fight for bathroom" "But wherever Rancho used to get water, he used to have bath there itself!" "He was very much attached to machines" "He used to carry a screwdriver in his pocket where ever he goes" "He would open any machine that he finds, some got closed some did not!" "There was another guy just like him" "Joy Lobo" "Sir, excuse me sir!" "Mr. Joy Lobo" "Sir would you mind lettting me know about the convocation dates?" "Why?" "Actually dad wanted to get a reservation" "I'm the first engineer in my village sir.." "All my relatives wanted to come on the convocation day" "In that case please make a phone call to your dad" "Son please, please dont waste my time hurry" "Hello" "Dad, director sir will speak to you" "Joy?" "Mr.Lobo your son won't be graduating this year" "What happened sir?" "He has violated all the deadlines with unrealistic" " Mr. Lobo, Mr. Lobo - unrealistic project it is I had told already" "He's making some non-sense helicopter" "So I recommend you not to reserve his ticket, I'm so sorry" "Sir I'm just close" "Is your project ready?" "Is your project ready?" "Sir atleast take a look at this once sir please" "Submit it, then I'll take into consideration" "Sir give me an extension sir Why?" "Why should I give you an extension?" "Sir after dad's stroke i couldn't concentrate for 2 months sir please" "Did you stop having food and water for 2 months?" "No" "Did you stop taking a bath?" "No?" "Then why did you stop studying?" "Sir I'm very close sir!" "Please take a look at this sir please!" "Mr. Lobo my son died falling from a train on sunday afternoon" "Monday morning Viru Sahastrabudhhe gave a lecture in this college So don't tell me that nonsense" "I can only give you sympathy, not an extension" "Sir.." "Wow what a design he made. wireless camera on a helicopter?" "Traffic updates, security... it can be used for all but it seems it won't fly" "Why won't it fly?" "I'll make it fly!" "Hey don't tell Joy." "We'll give him a surprise" "We'll make this fly out his window and record his reaction" "If we do his project, who'll do ours?" "Test, viva, quizzes included, there are 42 exams in each semester" "Hey, you worry a lot dude" "Take this hand and keep it on your heart and say," ""Aal iz well, aal iz well"" "All is well" ""Aal iz well"" "Now he has brought something new our Baba Rancchoddas!" "Hey in our village there was a watchman He used to yell in night saying "Aal iz well"" "And we used to sleep tight" "One night there was a robbery in our village, Then we came to know that he was blind." "And he yells "Aal iz well, aal iz well"" "and we used to sleep like fools" "But that day we came to know about the real fact see our heart right, is a big coward" "Keep our heart fooled if you have any big problem in life tell your heart" "No problem baby, everything is ok "Aal iz well, aal iz well"" "Hmm so that will solve the problem ?" "Huh?" "No but still it gains the dareness to survive" "Remember this mantra, this is gonna become more useful over here" "Got it, got it yeah" "Take it to Joy's window" "Hey joy, up up" "Oye window... see Silencer naked" "Hey Joy!" "Come out Joy" "Hey Joy look outside!" "Joy.." "#... give me some sunshine.. give me some rain...# #... give me another chance i wanna grow up once again.....#" "You've good news sir.." "neither police got to know nor Joy's dad...." "Everyone will think it's a suicide, sir" "Reason for death in postmortem report intense pressure on wind pipe resulting in choking" "this fool believed that died because of the pressure held here and pressure over here for the last 4 years?" "What about that?" "Even that's not in the report also sir," "These engineers are so back minded sir" "Didn't even invent some machine, that could really behold the pressure over here..." "If they had, we would've come to know this is not a suicide, it's a murder," "Are you blaming me for the suicide of Joy?" "If one student can't tolerate pressure why am I the one responsible?" "So much pressure will come in life" "Then everytime will you blame others for that?" "Sir I'm not blaming you sir" "Actually I'm blaming the system" "Sir I've got some statistics" "Sir in suicides India is number 1 sir" "Every 1 half hour one of the other students attempts suicide, sir" "Student die less from sickness and more from suicides here sir" "Something is going wron,g right sir?" "I can't tell about other colleges but this is one of the finest colleges in the country" "I've been running this college for 32 years" "I brought this college to number 1 from 28th position" "Sir what number 1 sir ?" "Here we dont have any talks related to new ideas, no talks on inventions" "Only great talk on only marks, or else jobs in USA" "We don't gain any knowledge here sir" "Here they only teach us how to get good marks" "Now are you going to teach me how to take classes?" "Please sit down" "Today we have our great leader behind us" "Who claims that he can teach better than our highly qualified teachers" "So today our professor Rancchoddas Chanchad will teach us engineering" "We do not have all day" "You all have 30 secs find the meanings of the words written on the board" "If you want you can make use of your books too" "Lift your hand up if you get the answer" "We'll see who'll come first and who's last" "Your time starts now" "Time up" "Time up sir, time up" "What?" "Nobody got the answer?" "Now rewind 1 minute of life a bit and think" "When I asked this question" "Anybody thought that today we will get something to learn new" "Anyone.." "Sir?" "No" "Everyone sunk in race" "What's the use if you come first studying like this?" "Will you improve your knowledge?" "No" "Only pressure will increase and this is a college not a PRESSURE COOKER" "The lion in the circus also learns to sit on the chair fearing the whip held in his owner's hand but we call such a lion as well trained, not well educated" "Hello.... this is not a philosophy class!" "Tell us the meaning of those 2 words," "Sir actually no such words exists sir these are my friends names" "Farhan and Raju" "Quiet!" "nonsense!" "You teach engineering like this?" "No sir I'm not teaching you engineering, you know better than me" "I was teaching you that, how to teach, and I believe that you learn someday for sure sir because I never leave my weaker students hand busted" "Quiet!" "Quiet i said!" "I would regret to inform you that your son Farhan, Raju is going on the wrong route" "If you don't take required action their future will be spoiled" "Virus's letters fell down in our homes like an atom bomb there was mourning in Hiroshima and Nagasaki!" "And we were invited to both the home to get kicked" "Come, come inside" "See there" "We could only afford one air conditioner" "And we didn't keep in our bedroom , we kept it in Farhan's bedroom for him to study conveniently" "I didn't buy car, riding scooter till now" "I invested all my money in Farhan's studies" "We sacrificed our future for Farhan's better future.." "did you understand or not?" "Then can you imagine what I must be going through!" "Hey you took all these photos Farhan?" "Quiet" "He has the ghost of photography in his head" "He used to take the images of animals and used to say he wanted to become wild life photographer" "Son, what was your percentage that year?" "91 percent" "Did you hear that?" "From 94 percent straight down to 91 pecent" "You feel it funny?" "No, no uncle no" "I was telling how great pictures he has taken" "Why are you making him an engineer?" "You could've made him a wild life photographer" "I'm folding my hands and requesting you" "Please dont spoil my son's future" "Kids" "Come, let's eat something when you come next time have food and go...." "Dad didn't give us food though and atlast to fill our hungry stomach, and to fill the quota of advice we reached Raju's home" "Raju's home reminds us about the 1950's black and white films one small bed where his paralysed father rested one coughing mother and one sister at her age of marriage" "Sofa with all springs out and 24 hours running water from the terrace mother was retired from school and tired almost all the time" "His dad was a postmaster at his age after paralysis he lost his half body and salary completely.... and sister!" "Kammo (Raju's sister) is 28 now asking Maruthi 800 as dowry..." "If you don't study and all how will she get married?" "Take lady's finger curry.. hand jee thank you" "You know wat?" "Lady's finger has now become 12 rupees per kg and cauliflower 10 rupees" "World is looting all over and upon that these kind of letters come from your college" "What will we eat?" "want paneer?" "Some time back you used to get little of paneer in goldsmith's shop" "Want paneer?" "No, no enough" "Mom just leave it and keep quiet!" "Ok ok, I'll keep quiet" "Earn for kids, work like a servant, and after all this you want me to keep my mouth shut?" "Hey this is all our news if I don't tell it to my son, To whom will i say?" "To his friends?" "Hey Raju" "It was a big confusion whether we should control our friend or wipe his mother's tears" "Then we thought to leave all these matters, and let's concentrate on mattar paneer now," "Even his eczema cream comes for 55 rupees now" "Want more roti son?" "No, no done no, stomach full aunty" "Lady's finger 12 rupees and caulli flower 10 rupees!" "At least we offered you some food unlike your hungry father" "Hitler Qureshi" "Ha ha your mom is Mother Teresa right?" "she was serving us itchy roti" "Don't make fun of my mother!" "Hey leave it, why are you all fighting?" "I'm feeling damn hungry Come lets go have some food outside" "This is the end of month who'll give money?" "His mom mother Teresa?" "To have food doesn't require money dude, uniform is required uniform" "Look there" "Come" "Come" "Namaste jee namaste" "Oh uncle!" "Hey listen get us 3 glass of vodka" "Half soda, half water" "What are the starters available?" "What ever get us two plates each and leave this here and change the music yaar, put on some Ghazal or something" "Pia what the hell is this?" "What have you worn?" "Bloody eighteenth century watch?" "What people will say?" "Watch Suhas's fiance, she is going to become doctor and she's wearing a watch just costing 200 bucks?" "Please take it off!" "Thank you" "Hi handsome" "Hey aunty, you're looking good" "Don't miss my set darling" "Rubies?" "from Mendelaves" "Mendelave wow!" "Hey lets go meet David, come I'll show you." "Of course, of course" "Excuse me" "Yes?" "Umm.. flowers" "Umm.. can i take this glass?" "Why?" "What if you break my head with that glass?" "Why would I throw this at you?" "because I'm gonna give you some free advice," "What?" "Don't ever marry that fool" "Excuse me?" "!" "He is not a human, he is just a price tag, price tag" "He'll embarrass you telling you prices of different things thing all of your life, your life will be spoiled and your future will be finished, should I give a demo?" "Should I find out what's the price of his shoes?" "I'm not gonna ask him, he himself will reveal, just a sec" "Oh my god!" "Hey, hey!" "What have you done?" "These are 300 dollar shoes" "You dropped mint chutney on my 300 dollar shoes!" "Run away, its a free advice, take it or leave it" "Genuine Itallian, leather, hand stiched," "Dad!" "are these your guests?" "These are my students" "Why are they here?" "One second" "This is really good dude, smelling very good," "Hey no space for puri dude, adjust it by side, ohh" "Hi" "Hey hi" "You helped me open up my eyes, thank you so much nothing like that..it was my duty!" "Can I ask you for a little more help?" "Yeah yeah" "My dad wont allow me to break the engagement with Suhas, how great you explain!" "It would be good if you give a demo for him also," "Yeah yeah why not, why not?" "I'll give a demo" "Raju get me chutney," "You're really sweet," "Where is he, where is your dad?" "right behind you," "Oh" ""Aal iz well, aal iz well"" "Run away, it's free advice, take it or leave it" "What are you all doing here?" "Umm sir.. we'll go on the stage, give this envelope and come sir" "Give it to me" "This is my sister's marriage" "Umm.. sis.. sister?" "Sir, totally how many daughters do you have, sir?" "It's empty!" "As I thought we didn't invite you, you all might be from groom's side right?" "No sir actually we're from science's side sir" "How?" "Can you explain?" "Dad, he explains really good, now itself he'll give demo, give" "Umm... sir in Delhi, power goes out frequently sir and this really affects the marriage too sir so I thought to make an inverter" "That can generate power from all cars that has come in the marriage," "Ohhh" "Wow and did you make the inverter?" "Sir design is ready sir!" "Umm.. where is the design Farhan?" "i've given you the design right?" "Aah, i had given to Raju," "Raju, design?" "Sir actually, leave it sir I'll make the inverter itself and show you directly," "You can only make us fool, not an inverter!" "No sir I'll surely make the inverter, I promise and I'll give your name for the inverter because after all it had been invented in your daughter's marriage so it'll an honour," "Farhan, Raju.." "I wish to meet both of you in the office tomorrow" "Sir what was your per plate cost sir," "We'll pay sir" "In terms of installment sir and afterward we wont intrude in any marriage sir" "I wont even enter my marriage also sir, infact I wont marry also sir, even he wont marry also sir hanh hanh, even I wont sir" "Even your parents shouldnt've married" "2 idiots wouldnt've taken birth in this world" "Sit!" "Pay attention..." "?" "This is Rancchoddas's father's monthly income 2.5 crore rupees" "Now from this," "If you take out 1 or 2 zeros" "It doesn't make much of a difference" "But if one more zero is removed," "I would worry a little this is your father's monthly income, Mr. Farhan!" "Yes... yes sir, and now if you make it one more zero less," "Now this is your family income Mr. Raju Rastogi," "Big reason to worry," "Follow Viru Sahastrabudhhe's suggestion, change your rooms" "And get shifted with Chathur Ramalingam" "Exams are closer, and if you stay with that Chanchad," "You will never pass your exams!" "#..... opera started......#" "Wanna get shaved?" "No sir" "Then get lost!" "Raju you try to understand," "Virus is playing games between us, divide and rule" "Don't get scared" "I have to be scared!" "For me to get a good job, I need good grades, and grades are within his hands," "I don't have rich father like you..using whose money, I can spend the rest of my life" "Hey Raju what nonsense are you saying?" "Should we do whatever he says hanh?" ""Aal iz well, aal iz well"?" "You'll be the only one who's gonna catch his tail not me," "Now you're crossing the line," "No im making line in between, because I have to support my family!" "Mom's half salary has been spend on dad's medicines," "Sister's marriage is not happening, as the groom wants a Maruthi 800," "for the past 5 years" "Mom dint even buy one saree," "Yaar..now in this argument..if you are getting mother's saree in between..what can I say?" "Yaar so like that how many sarees are reserved for one year?" "Don't make fun of my mother!" "Hey raju we will study, with complete dedication we'll study," "But not only to pass exams, some great scholar has said, "Never study to be successful, study for self efficiency"" "Don't run behind success," "Excellence follow behind excellence success will come all way behind you," "Which great scholar said this?" "Baba Rancchoddas?" "Hey, hey don't get tense yaar, we'll top the exams yaar, nothing is impossible!" "nothing is impossible?" "hanh?" "Take this," "Now put this back!" "Raju changed his train's bogey," "Noww he started the journey (saffar) with Chathur," "Not the "saffar" in hindi, english's SUFFER" "S" "U" "F" "F" "E" "R" "SUFFER" "Everyone calls Chathur "Silencer"" "To make his mind even more sharper," "He used to eat some bengali Baba's Paan, and he used to leave his HOT AIR!" "I didn't do it!" "Raju...." "And he always put the blame on others!" "Silencer used to study for 18 hours a day and during the night, he used to distract others from study #.... oooo baby.... come on baby ye.....# he believed in two ways of topping exams" "one is to get marks by yourself, or try reducing other's marks" "Rancho has made the combined plan to teach Silencer a lesson, and to help Raju, our director sir has done much miracle here," "Chamatkaar (miracle) means...." "I dont want the meaning Dubey-ji, I'll memorize it...." "Chathur has been chosen to present the introductory speech on teacher's day he wrote a speech in pure hindi with librarian Dubey-ji to impress Virus," "Hello, yes will call," "Chathur, you have a call" "Dubey-ji please keep this print out with you, I'll come back in sometime," "Oh even do that work also" "Hey Dubey-ji!" "Director sir has remembered you, yeah now" "Ok you give this to Chathur, I'll come back now" "Hello, hello" "Hello Mr. Ramalingam?" "Yes?" "Yeah I'm calling from Lajpat Nagar police station," "Are you from Uganda?" "Yes sir" "Hmmm your life is at risk" "What?" "!" "How?" "!" "Umm listen to my instructions carefullly" "Else when you step out from the college gate You'll face death in centre of the road itself," "Why?" "What happened?" "By the time Chathur recovers from this shock," "Before that itself Rancho changed a few words in the speech like....." ""chamathkaar" has become "Balathkaar" [ miracle ] [ rape ]" "Did you call me sir?" "Who are you?" "Dubey librarian," "I'm permanent sir" "Congratulations!" "Umm.. one minute, one minute" "Commisioner sir is calling, hold on," "Excuse me sir, sir" "Take the phone, take it!" "What do I say?" "Yeah, yeah where was I?" "You were saying, outside the gate, my death" "Ah!" "When you go out the gate, you a see a signal in front of you" "Traffic signal!" "Ah ok ok" "When that signal becomes red, all vehicles will stop," "Ok, ok, then?" "Then you cross the road carefully," "You know why son nowadays traffic is huge" "So like if any vehicle hits you or something, you might die," "What nonsense, I know that!" "Oh you know that?" "Very good son then you are safe, Well done well done." "#......became a fool.......#" "Hey Silencer!" "Dubey has given you this" "Hey you don't call me that CHANCHAD," "CHANCHAD" "Director told me that he didn't call me" "He didn't call you, I told you that he remembered you!" "Idiots!" "Respected teachers," "Chief guest minister Shri R.D. Tripati-ji," "Students, and my dear friends" "Today if I.C.E. is touching sky high limits, then the credit goes to only one man" "Shri Viru Sahastrabudhhe!" "Give him a hand, sir he's saying it but every word is mine" "He is a great guy, really you are, for the past 32 years he has continuously in this college, committed rapes upon rapes" "this means.. miracles upon miracles" "Hope he continues to do so we often wondered, how a person in his lifetime can do these many rapes?" "With his extreme self discipline.." "he's made himself this capable correct usage of time complete utilization of the bell" "Somebody, learn from him, learn from him, learn from him!" "Sit down, sit down" "Today, we all students are here tomorrow, we'll spread across so many countries" "I promise you all" "Whichever country we are in - there we'll rape!" "We'll enlight the name of I.C.E.!" "We'll show everyone, the capability to perform rape that students have over here!" "No other students across the globe have it!" "No other students, no other students!" "Respected minister" "Namaskar" "You have given that thing for this institution that we needed the most" "Money Money!" "Tits!" "Not that!" "That means tits!" "What kind of insulting things is this boy saying?" "!" "Tits are there with everyone" "Everyone keeps it hidden" "Nobody never gives it" "Huh?" "Huh?" "This guy is too vulgar!" "You have given your tits in the hands of this rapist" "Now let us see," "How he makes use of it!" "Sahastrabudhhe, don't you have any brains?" "Indecent guy" "On this golden occasion, I can recollect a Shlok" "Listen listen, now he'll explain his farting stength in Sanskrit" "Uthamam dadadatu paadham [ The loudest fart is like a motor vehicle ]" "Paadham?" "Ooo SILENCER!" "[ fart ]" "Madyam paadam tuchuk tuchuk." "[ The middle fart is like the sound of a train ]" "Kanishtam thud thudiya paadam [ The smallest fart ] sur suriiee............ praana kadakam..." "[is a silent killer]" "See, without understanding if you cram things, this will be the result, see see!" "By cramming, you can save 4 years of your college life.." "But for the next 40 years of your life, you'll go on getting raped" "Aare yaar, we made him understand so much.." "But still he hasnt understood!" "Madyam paadam thuchuk thuchuk..." "[ The middle fart is like the sound of a train ]" "Unbelievable yaar!" "You did the right thing Rancho how fun it was...... hehe poor fellow didn't had any idea" "Hey you!" "Hey" "You swines!" "In what way have I harmed you?" "Hey sorry dude don't take it personally," "I'll take it personally," "Chathur Ramalingam is not going to forget this insult," "I'll think of it every minute, every second of my life!" "Dude leave it, actually we were giving demo for Raju... that don't cram things and study" "Understand and study, enjoy the beauty of science yaar" "I'm not here to enjoy thing" "Then what?" "Are you here to rape?" "Or have you come here to rape science!" "Tuchuk Tuchuk!" "[sound of train]" "Laugh!" "Laugh at my methods.." "One day using these methods" "I'll become successful and show everyone" "And then I'll laugh, and you'll cry!" "Yaar, you're boarding the wrong train again" "Don't run behind success become a great engineer such that success runs behind you" "These ideals don't work in the real world CHANCHAD" "You board your train, and I'll board mine and 10 years from now we'll come back to this same station on this same date," "We'll see who's more successful!" "You?" "Or me!" "Do you dare?" "Then lets bet..." "Speak!" "Will you come?" "Will you come?" "!" "What are you doing yaar?" "What has happened to him!" "What is he writing yaar?" "Don't forget this date" "I'm not used to such expensive gifts, Suhas!" "Get used to it Pia." "You're going to be Suhas Tandon's wife!" "Where's the bill man?" "I'll be back!" "You changed the speech right?" "Don't lie!" "Oh... umm.. yeah" "What problem do you have with my dad, huh?" "I don't have any problem with him" "I'm making an inverter with his name - see this" "Oh" "Broke it!" "Why are you against my dad, hanh?" "Because he's not running a college, but a factory" "Where donkeys are manufactured every year" "See, see over there, your donkey" "How dare you call him a donkey!" "Then what else should i call him?" "First he did engineering, then MBA, and after that he went to America to work for a bank" "If he had to work in a bank only, then why did he do engineering?" "For such donkeys, life only means a profit or loss statement" "He's seeing there's profit being with you, that's why he's with you" "You, the director's daughter, who is going to be a doctor, it's good for his image" "He has no attachment to you" "What do you think of yourself?" "What do you mean by saying Suhas is not interested in me?" "You bought new watch?" "One minute, hold this" "I have to show you a demo everytime..." "Hey Suhas!" "Where were you?" "I've been looking for you!" "She lost her watch yaar, she's searching for it" "What!" "You lost the watch?" "Aare leave it yaar.. get a new one" "Aare it cost 4 lakhs!" "4 lakhs!" "Mine costs only 150 yaar but shows the same time" "Oh shut up!" "How could you be so careless Pia!" "This careless attitude is disgusting" "It's disrespectful" "That was a limited edition watch you just lost!" "You got it for free so that's it." "Now you wear your 18th century watch at dinner" "What?" "What are you staring at?" "Huh?" "Now you start crying?" "Real mature Pia" "I can't handle this." "Now stop crying and search!" "Search for some other hand for this watch...donkey!" "Hey.. you're solid yaar.." "You called him a donkey to his face!" "Get lost!" "Yaar it's too noisy here right?" "She's saying thank you to me, but I hear it as get lost" "I said get lost only!" "Aare yaar, why are you getting so angry?" "Do you know you never actually loved him at all!" "What do you mean?" "It means, whenever he comes infront of you" "Have you ever felt like wind is blowing, or dupatta/veil is flying in slow motion?" "Or the moon looks even bigger in the sky?" "Such things only happen in a film, not in real life!" "Aare no no, it happens in real life also." "If you love a human, it'll happen" "It doesnt happen with donkeys #.... phone ringing...#" "Hello!" "Yeah" "What?" "Oh God!" "Ok ok, I'm coming." "Yeah bye bye!" "Hey you're a medical student right?" "I need your help, it's an emergency, please please!" "Come with me,please" "Aare yaar you doctors take an oath that you'll never say no to a patient!" "What do you call it?" "Hippocratic Oath!" "Yaar help me yaar, please,its an emergency, please!" "You barged into my sister's engagement, you broke my engagement" "Dad is taking BP pills because of you" "And I'm helping you over here!" "Unbelivable!" "This Hippocratic Oath; it has just ruined doctor's lives!" "Aunty, where is Raju?" "He's gone to get a taxi." "We called for an ambulance two hours ago.." "our country is so weird, there is a guarantee for pizza to reach in 30 minutes, but an ambulance?" "He must be hospitalised... urgently!" "Hey, stop man!" "Move, move, move, move!" "Move, move, move, move!" "Doctor, doctor!" "Emergency, emergency!" "Patient" "Keep this with you" "Hey Raju" "Idiot, you brought dad on a scooter?" "!" "Then should I have sent him through speed post?" "Don't get into my dad's profession!" "Where?" "Where is dad?" "Ask the doctor!" "This was a close call Pia" "If it would've been late by 2 or 2.5 hours, then we would have lost him" "Good that you did not wait for an ambulance and got him on a scooter, I'll go now, if there is any problem, call me ok?" "Bye" "Rancho..." "Thank you yaar" "Idiot, are you saying thank you to a friend?" "Is that Silencer teaching you manners?" "Hasn't he told you." "Friendship is the biggest sthan of a human!" "Go go, now go." "You guys have exam tomorrow, right?" "Aare there are a lot of exams, but only one dad" "Now we'll take the post master sir and go only then!" "Rancho forgive me yaar, I was frightened!" "Enough, enough, shhh, quiet, quiet" "Forgive me!" "Enough..." "Quiet" "Enough..." "Quiet" "Go, meet dad, and dont go with such a gloomy face" "Go..." "Thanks yaar" "Go" "#..... he was our pal......#" "Your scooter saved a life today." "It's nice" "How much is it?" "Put chutney and see." "Maybe I'll tell!" "Hey happy Independence day!" "But today is not 15th August" "But it is so for you, now you can wear your mom's watch whenever you want!" "Nobody will say why have you worn an 18th century watch and all that!" "Bye" "Hey" "How do you know tat it was my mom's watch?" "At a sister's wedding, if a girl is nicely dressed head to toe" "Except for an old watch on the hand, what does it mean?" "On that day, you were missing your mom a lot, right?" "Yes" "Your mom must have been very beautiful, right?" "Yes, how do you know?" "Have you seen your dad?" "Life is a race, If you don't run fast, you'll be like a broken egg of the cuckoo bird" "Today we'll teach you how to prepare chutney" "This chutney is very useful," "This is not only to have, But it's really useful to understand people too" "Now the bad time has gone for you" "Now you can leave donkeys and start loving humans" "Time is perfect for starting love" "Temperature is constant, and the climate is clear and clean" "And if you felt love for someone sure it's gonna rain on you" "Hello... wake up!" "What.." "Uncle passed away or what!" "What?" "No stupid!" "It's already 8:30.. at 9:00,the exam starts.." "you wanna go or not?" "!" "Aare yaar.. how can you leave him alone here and go!" "I'm there, doctors are there, and it's only a matter of 3 hours" "Come on!" "Take my scooter and go!" "Now come on go, it's getting late" "Hey!" "Why have you worn an old watch!" "Go!" "Sorry sir, we were late, emergency!" "Settle down there!" "Sir they are still writing!" "Hello, time up!" "Sir, 5 minutes sir, we were half-an hour late!" "It was an emergency sir, please please!" "The examiner looked at us like we asked for both his kidneys!" "But we still continued to write" "While he was busy arranging papers according to roll numbers" "It's over sir" "You're late!" "I can't take your papers" "Sir, please sir" "Sir, do you know, who we are?" "Even if you are the prime minister's son, I won't accept your paper!" "Sir do you know our names and roll numbers?" "No.. who are you guys?" "You dont know...then... run, run, run, run!" "Hey!" "What's your roll number?" "Where is it?" "Where is his paper?" "Aaaahhh!" "Today the results were gonna come" "Scared and innocent!" "All were busy striking a deal with God" "God please save me with electronics, I'll break coconuts!" "Oh snake-god!" "Save my physics, I shall send one litre of milk everyday!" "Oh cow-god!" "Just, just get me passing marks" "God I'll treat Malati and Sangeeta like my sisters, please save my results!" "God, God I'll offer 100 rupees per month, surely God!" "Promise!" "Nowadays, traffic constables also dont accept 100 rupees, as if God would fall for it!" "Check, check, check from below, check from below" "It's yours yaar..." "last" "And yours?" "Second last!" "And Rancho?" "It's not there yaar!" "My heart sank," "Not because we were last but because our friend had failed!" "Not posibble!" "It's fine Chatur" "There is a mistake!" "It's not possible!" "This is injustice!" "Injustice!" "Oh God!" "Why is this idiot Silencer shouting so much?" "He has come second..." "Idiot." "Who's first then?" "Rancho..." "Rancho?" "!" "Idiot.." "Move.." "Move yaar" "We learnt something about human behaviour that day" "If your friend fails, you feel sad" "But if your friend comes first, you feel even more sad!" "On that day we were sad" "But there were two more people who were sadder than us" "Rancchoddas Chanchad, first row, right of the director!" "Uday Sinha, second row, third seat!" "Alok Mittal, second row, fifth seat!" "Hey!" "Sir, is it compulsory to sit acccording to our ranks?" "Why, do you have any problem?" "Sir, I have problem with entire grading system itself!" "It's like the caste-system sir!" "A grade students-kings, C grade students-slaves!" "It's not nice sir!" "Do you have a better idea for this?" "Yes sir, I do!" "Results should not be put up on a notice board" "Why should we exhibit someone's weakness in front of all?" "Now sir, if in your blood test, the haemoglobin count is less will the doctor give you tonic or put up your report on the TV?" "You see sir!" "So basically what you're saying is I must go to each one's room one-by-one and say their results in their ears?" "!" "You've come first, you've come second, I'm so sorry, you failed" "No sir, I didn't mean that way" "But the thing is, grades creates divide; divide" "Now see.." "I've come first so I'm sitting with you" "Whereas my friends have come last So they are seated in the last, in a corner" "At least they are sitting in a corner now, if they continue being with you, next year they'll be out of the photo itself!" "Neither will they pass nor any company will give them jobs!" "Sir, they'll find a job somehow sir" "There will be at least a few companies which hire people and not machines for work!" "It's not like that sir, they'll find a job.." "I guarantee it" "Oh?" "You guarantee it?" "You guarantee it?" "!" "Bet sir?" "Bet?" "Govind" "If even one among those two get a job in the campus interviews then shave my moustache!" "Ok sir!" "Happy?" "Happy sir!" "Woahhhh!" "By using the car's horn, you want to hide your horn?" "Idiot!" "Idiot!" "Septic tank!" "You had the Churan again?" "I didn't do it..." "Raju!" "We've been very used to this hot air from those days" "This idiot is responsible for global warming!" "Oh I can't take it!" "Give me, give me your wallet." "I'll go and buy some pants!" "Leave it yaar, wear this Chatur Ramaalingam's suit pant!" "Hey don't you touch my suit!" "Leave it yaar, Rancho will recognise you even without the pant!" "Hey Mr. where's this address?" "Brother, if I was so educated would I be selling groundnuts?" "He doesn't know to read" "But at least he knows to speak!" "Brother, here in Simla is there any Rancchoddas Chanchad?" "Yes, yes, he stays over there!" "#....he was like the fleeting wind.....#" "Let's go!" "#...." "like a fluttering kite.....# #..... where did he go?" "let find him!" "......#" "Oye Chatur.." "Here's your bottle of Churan!" "Oh thanks, where did you find it?" "It was in the pocket!" "Hey!" "How dare you!" "That's my pant!" "Hey what's mine, what's yours?" "It's written in Gita!" "Hey shut up!" "Take off the pants" "Hey what are you doing yaar!" "People will misinterpret!" "Mad!" "Idiot!" "Hey leave" "Hey I want it now!" "What happened?" "Rancho's dad!" "Brother, where can I find Rancchoddas?" "He's sitting over there" "Thank you" "Rancho!" "Yes?" "Oh sorry, we wish to meet Rancchoddas" "I'm Rancchoddas, what is it?" "No.." "Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad" "I'm Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad... what is it?" "Rancho, take care of yourself!" "Rancchoddas Chanchad!" "Raju!" "Yaar, I must be the first man in history who travelled from Delhi to Simla in underwear that too to meet a wrong person!" "Yaar, the same name, the same degree, and the same photo!" "But the person is different." "What's the matter?" "I'm unable to understand!" "But from where did Silencer get Rancho's address?" "Yes!" "Oye chatur!" "Come here" "Hey!" "Hey!" "How dare you open this!" "I got this from San Francisco" "It's hand-made biscuit.." "Especially for Mr. Phunsukh Wangdu!" "Phunsukh Bangdu?" "Now who is this?" "Wangdu, Wangdu!" "'W', 'W'!" "Phunsukh Wangdu!" "Do you know who that is?" "He's a great scientist, 400 patents, the world wants him!" "I have been chasing him for the past year and the meeting has been fixed now!" "You know once he signs a deal with my company, I'll be huge!" "Huge!" "Now stop praising this Wangdu and tell us from where did you get Rancho's address?" "You should be thanking Phunsukh Wangdu!" "It's because of him, that I found a clue" "See this, my secretary Tracey was here last month to arrange a meeting with Phunsukh Wangdu" "Tracey couldn't get an appointment with Phunsukh but I got Rancho" "I checked Simla's phone directory, in that the name was Chanchad Rancchoddas" "Then how did his appearance change?" "He heard you are coming and got plastic surgery done or what?" "Only one man can answer this!" "I'm sorry dad!" "I couldn't fulfil your last wish!" "You kept on saying, "take me to Haridwar, take me to Haridwar"" "But I was waiting for the highway's tender to be opened" "The tender opened over there and you closed your eyes over here!" "I'm so sorry dad!" "I could not be a good son!" "What are you saying yaar?" "You have become such a great engineer, the degree's been put up on the wall" "You are a very good son!" "How dare you enter my property without my permission!" "I'll put you behind bars!" "You'll go behind bars, idiot!" "We have investigated everything" "On the basis of your I.C.E. degree, you're taking these highway contracts and hydro projects" "This degree belongs to our friend!" "How did it come to you?" "It's a 150 hectares property." "I'll blow off your heads and bury you in a corner, nobody will get to know" "Get the point?" "Now get lost!" "I'm taking dad's ashes and going to Haridwar." "If you want, I'll even take your bones along with that!" "Lift the dad!" "Over there, there, there!" "Leave my dad!" "Tell us who you are, or else I shall immerse your dad's ashes over here itself" "Handover dad to me!" "Dad's ashes wont go to the Ganga, they'll go into the gutter!" "Remove dad from the pot, remove from the pot!" "If you press the trigger then I'll press the flush!" "See, I'll count till three, that's it!" "Hey, who are you scaring?" "Shoot!" "Raju, put it in!" "One.." "Hey, we'll go to hell but along with that we'll even finish your dad!" "Got it?" "!" "Two.." "Then strain-strain and remove your dad using a strainer!" "What?" "We got the wrong one, this one is empty." "Empty?" "Empty?" "Empty!" "We'll empty it!" "No!" "No!" "We'll empty it, we'll empty it!" "I'm tellin you we'll empty it!" "Noooooooo!" "Hands up!" "Come on tell, tell!" "Who are you?" "Aare, I'm Rancchoddas yaar!" "No!" "I swear on dad!" "I swear on dad, I'm telling the truth yaar!" "I'm Rancchoddas, he was Chhote!" "Chhote?" "He was the son of our gardener" "Everyone used to call him Chhote!" "Even after his mom and dad passed away, dad let him stay in the house!" "He used to do odd household works, you know" "Changing bulbs, getting eggs and bread, ironing, like" "He was very much interested in studies!" "He used to wear my old uniform and get into the school" "Whichever class he liked, he would go and sit in that one!" "I used to take advantage of that" "I used to make him do my homework also and make him write my exam papers also" "I was having a good time!" "Then one day" "Master-ji saw that a 6th standard child was solving a 10th standard problem" "Which class are you in, son?" "What's your name?" "We were caught" "Dad was a big man so Master-ji thought it's better to tell him before telling the principal" "You've begun this, so you will end it!" "The whole Himachal salutes in front of me" "But as soon as I turn away, behind my back they call me an illiterate!" "This wont happen with my son!" "He wants education, and me, just a degree" "Let it continue as it is, make this boy an engineer" "Rancchoddas Chanchad's degree, I want it over there on that wall" "I went away to London for four years and he kept studying in I.C.E. using my name" "He had a deal with my dad that after getting a degree from I.C.E." "He won't meet anyone from I.C.E. in his whole lifetime!" "He usually said "I won't go meet anyone, but one day two idiots will come searching for me then what will you do?"" "He misses you both a lot!" "I'll give you the address" "Go meet him" "But dont tell my secret to anyone yaar, please!" "Which secret?" "Sir-ji, you got the wrong urn!" "The master is in this hHey what the hell is going on?" "Who was that gun man?" "Aare its a very complicated story and it is without subtitles You cant understand" "Ignore it, ignore it" "Where are we going?" "Ladakh" "Ladakh?" "Why?" "To meet Rancho!" "Is he in Ladakh?" "What is he doing over there?" "Don't know, but this is a school's address!" "School teacher... he he he!" "Master-ji!" "I'm vice-president of Rockledge Corporation!" "and he..." "A for apple, B for ball!" "D for donkey!" "Next week, I'll be signing a multi-million dollar deal with Phunshukh Wangdu!" "and he..." "A for apple, B for ball!" "Today, my respect grew even more for that Idiot Rancho!" "We all went to college only to get a degree" "If we dont have a degree, we won't have a job!" "If you don't have a job, no father will give his daughter's hand" "Bank won't give credit card, and the world won't respect us" "But that idiot came to college, not for the degree but to study!" "He wasn't afraid to come last or greedy to come first!" "Who was the first man to step on the moon?" "Neil Armstrong sir!" "Obviously it's Neil Armstrong, we all know it." "But who was the second man?" "Don't waste your time, it's not important!" "Nobody remembers the man who ever came second!" "After two months, 26 companies will come to this college to offer jobs to you all!" "That means before your final exams," "You'll have jobs on your hands!" "This is your last act my friends!" "Put the medal on the pedal, press the accelerator Go out there and make history!" "Any questions?" "Yes.." "Sir, suppose any student gets a job and he fails in the finals by 1-2 marks then will the job remain or?" "Very good question is there any other person, in whose mind, the same question is arising?" "As expected" "Please come on stage, everyone give them a big hand." "Come on the stage, come" "Come, come, don't waste time!" "For the past four years, they have been the most consistent students of I.C.E.!" "Because consistently, they've come last in every exam" "Come my geniuses, come" "If we remove these two people's brains and sell them in the market, we'll get a very goodd price!" "Because they are unused brains!" "They have never been used!" "And to answer to their question whether they paas or fail, it's not going to affect their jobs because they are not going to get jobs at all!" "I guarantee it" "Their names will be written in gold" "FARHANITRATE and PRERAJULISATION!" "Give them a big hand please, everybody!" "Idiot, he raped us completely collective rape you know, in front of, in front of everyone!" "God, I'll stop eating non-veg, I'll light thousands of incense sticks!" "Do only one thing take away Virus from this world!" "Burn him in hell" "Make hot pakkodas of him in hot oil!" "God!" "Are you giving God a contract to kill?" "Idiot you sit quietly" "Idiot every year you sit in the centre with VIRUS and take photos" "While we'll be rotting on the side" "This year I think we'll be finished out of the photo itself!" "Do you know why I come first?" "Why?" "Because I'm in love with machines" "Engineering is my passion, passion" "Do you know what your passion is?" "Hey that's my bag" "Keep quiet man!" "What are you doing, Rancho?" "Hey" "This is your passion!" "This!" "This!" "Go and post this letter" "But what is it?" "5 years ago, he had written this letter to his favorite wild life photographer!" "Andre.." "Isthawa?" "Yeah Isthawa" "He wanted to go to him, go to Hungary and learn, work from him!" "but fearing his dad, due to Hitler Qureshi, he never posted the letter at all!" "Aare, quit Engineering and become a wild life photographer!" "Do that work which you are talented in!" "If Lata Mangeshkar's dad would have told her to become a fast bowler or Sachin Tendulkar's father would have told him to be a singer" "Then think, where would they stand today?" "Are you understanding what I'm saying?" "Idiot, he loves animals but is marrying machines!" "Baba Rancchoddas" "My girlfriend and wife, both are engineering itself" "Then why do I come last, tell?" "Because you are a coward.. coward" "See this, see his hand, the fingers are less and the rings are more" "One for exam, one for sister's marriage and one for job" "Aare if you are you scared of the future do you think you can live?" "And what will you focus on today?" "I've got weird friends yaar" "One fears and lives, and one idiot dies and lives!" "Hey" "But you idiot, do both the things" "You fear also and die also" "I don't fear!" "Hey listen" "He dies on Pia and fears to tell" "Go go, get lost" "It's easy to give free advice dude but difficult to follow it" "If you dare then go and tell pia!" "Tell" "Hey from where all are you guys connecting things?" "There's full connection Baba" "Listen to me, listen to me" "What I say is, if you go and tell Pia about what you're feeling" "Then even I'll go and tell my dad that I want to be a photographer and don't want to be an engineer" "Yes" "Even I'll remove all my rings and go to an interview" "Now say" "Say... do you dare?" "Baba Rancchoddas rolled his tongue back." "What will he say?" "Come" "Come" "Where, where?" "Come" "Viru" "Jay has come Viru!" "See, see if there's any dog!" "Hey cowards, I'm not afraid of anything!" "Come!" "Hey you guys get in." "If there's any danger outside, I'll give a Virus alert!" "Idiot!" "Virus!" "Old man!" "Hey" "Shall I give background music?" "Pia?" "Sshhhhh... don't shout" "I'm Rancchoddas Chanchad" "Listen to me for 2 minutes then I'll go away" "[Raju singing in the background] [Don't say anything, don't say anything at all]" "Pia, the 22 minutes that I spent with you on the scooter those were the most beautiful 22 minutes of my life!" "I can spend the rest of my life on the scooter with you" "Wow!" "#.......everything is still.......#" "Do you know, you come on scooter everyday wearing a bride's costume in my dreams!" "Instead of the veil, you take off your helmet and you come near me to kiss me" "but that kiss wont happen yaar" "Why?" "Because the nose comes in between and then I wake up" "Nose doesn't come in between, stupid!" "I'm sorry!" "I thought you were Pia" "I wish i was" "Sister, why did you interrupt in between?" "He took 4 years to say this" "Pia kiss him and tell him, nose doesn't come in between!" "You have my permission" "Kiss him yaar!" "He's so cute" "Who is this?" "Sister" "Who are you?" "Do you know, when you were speakin, he kicked for the first time!" "He?" "How do you know if it's a he or she?" "Dad had asked the astrologer" "He wanted to know, is an engineer coming home or a doctor?" "That means?" "That means if it's a boy, then it's an engineer and if it's a girl, then it's a doctor" "Oye champ you stay inside itself, outside there's a lot of circus!" "And the circus's ringmaster, your granfather will spin the hunter and say run!" "Life is a race, run, be an engineer" "But you become whatever your heart says" "If he scares you too much" "Keep a hand on your heart and say "All iz well"!" "He kicked!" "Say it again "Aal iz well"!" ""Aal iz well"!" "Yes!" "He kicked!" "He kicked Pia!" "Say "Aal iz well"!" ""Aal iz well"!" "Goooooooo!" "You sent a letter to my dad!" "Take this pee-mail freely from us" "Pigeon, go go go" "Pigeon, go go go" "Pigeon, go go go" "Who is it?" "Who is it?" "Your coming son-in-law!" "Idiotic Virus and marriage attenders!" "Rastogi?" "!" "Security!" "That way, that way!" "So you all have already learnt about the simple pendulum" "Now let's get down to the advanced study about compound pendulum" "It's an irregular object oscillating about it's own axis" "Let me demonstrate to you" "What's this?" "Pencil" "What's inside it?" "Lead!" "Good!" "Lead is the axis to this pencil" "Even you can be a compound pendulum if you osscilate about" "Where is Raju Rastogi?" "Present sir!" "Hi, everybody is here" "Good morning sir" "Where were you last night?" "Sir, he was studying sir." "He was studying for the whole night sir!" "Really?" "He hasn't slept for two nights, that's why he's looking like this sir!" "What are you saying?" "What were you studying?" "Ummmm" "Induction motors sir, induction motor, he studied fully sir!" "Induction motor!" "In that case, Mr. Raju Rastogi" "Yes sir?" "Can you tell me how an induction motor starts?" "Brrrrrrrrm" "Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr brrrrrrrrrr" "Stop it!" "Brrrrrrrrrrmmm brmmmmm brmm brm" "Sir.. rum!" "Mr. Rastogi, let's have a cup of tea in my office" "Sir" "Close the door" "Do you know how to type?" "Yes sir" "Can you type a letter for me?" "Definitely sir" "Come, sit" "Sir, I'm sorry sir" "Please type" "Dear sir," "It is my painful duty to inform you that your son is restigated" "No, no sorry." "Delete it, delete it, go back!" "Your son Mr. Raju Rastogi" "Is restigated from the Imperial College of Engineering!" "Come on, type, type, come on, go on!" "Dad will die sir" "Please type" "Sir, please sir" "My decision is final and irrevocable!" "He's living only in hope that he could see me become an engineer sir!" "You could've thought of this before you pissed in front of my door" "Sir give me one more chance sir, please!" "Just one chance!" "Sir, please sir!" "Ok, remove your name from the letter and put Rancchoddas Chanchad's name!" "I know he was with you last night!" "Be my witness and I won't remove you from the college" "You have 7.5 minutes with you to think" "#......we wont let you go .......# #.......we shall not let you leave.......#" "#.......even if god might summon you.......# #.....but we are not the one who fear him.....# #.....we are standing here in this ground with resolve.....#" "#.....take out our eyes from our pal....# #....no matter how hard you try.....# #....we're not gonna let you leave lik this.....#" "#......we wont let you go .......# #.......we shall not let you leave.......#" "Rancho, look at that monitor" "Raju!" "The body is paralyzed due to the shock but the mind is alert he can see us and hear us!" "Please aunty, don't cry in front of him!" "Talk to him normally, motivate him, crack jokes, keep him happy" "Oye Raju, we have a good news yaar" "Dad has become well yaar!" "That new medicine worked!" "It's the Rastogi family's tradition that" "If one man gets up, the other man will lie down!" "Come on, come on, get up now!" "Your dad is asking for Pia's scooter?" "What do you say?" "Shall I give it?" "Won't he bang it?" "Hey Raju, Farhan wants to tell you somethin" "On the webcam, live from the hostel!" "See this, Virus has cancelled your suspension, problem solved!" "Come on, wake up at least now!" "Everything is solved" "Oye are you listening?" "Hey!" "Rastogi!" "See this?" "Mom bought a new saree, new saree!" "Brand new!" "It costs 2000 bucks son, see?" "At least get up now, idiot!" "Not one, she bought ten sarees, ten!" "See?" "!" "Oye Raju!" "Raju tell me, how do I look?" "Hey, Kammo have you heard about Kammo?" "Aare, Kammo's marriage has been fixed and that too without any dowry!" "Hey, bridegroom, the bridegroom doesn't want Maruti 800" "Doesn't want anything, wants Kammo, only Kammo" "And do you know who the bridegroom is?" "Yes?" "Who's the bridegroom?" "Guess it!" "You know him very well!" "He loves animals a lot" "And, and he's gonna be a wild life photographer!" "Hey keep quiet!" "Keep quiet!" "Didn' t flash?" "Aare,it's our Farhan yaar!" "As if our Farhan will take dowry from you people!" "Aare, our Farhan will marry your sister.." "Farhan!" "And that too, free, free, free" "Hey, hey" "Hey, hey Raju" "Raju" "If we would have given 1 kilo lady's finger and 1/2 kilo paneer freely to that idiot," "Even then he would get up" "What was the need to sacrifice me?" "Well done yaar, well done, well done" "Everything is fixed, your sister's marriage is fixed" "Farhan will marry, ok done!" "Rancho!" "Idiots, how much will you lie?" "You are saved,idiot!" "Did you call for a taxi?" "I have called for it, it's waiting" "Thank you" "Why?" "I have to go for a job interview" "Oh, so you gonna go with me?" "No, I'll drop you home and I'll go for the job interview!" "Idiot, why will I go home?" "Did you forget?" "We had promised something to this idiot!" "Give, give me your tie!" "Why?" "Give it, I dont think after reading this, you'll be able to go for the interview!" "What is this?" "It's a letter" "It's come for you from Hungary!" "It's some photographer, Andre Isthawan!" "Idiots, you posted my letter?" "He liked your photos very much.." "he's become crazy!" "He wants to make you his assistant!" "He has called you to work, in the Brazilian rainforest for one year!" "He's sayin..he'll even give you a salary!" "Dad wont oblige!" "Go to him and make him understand lovingly" "Don't fear today farhan.." "Otherwise after 50 years when you'll be old and fallen in the hospital and waiting to die you'll think then, this letter was in my hand, taxi was at the gate if I had dared a little bit, life would have been something else!" "What do you think, will he like it?" "What was the need to get such an expensive one!" "Today, son is getting a job" "Now the days to put our head up and roam with pride are arriving and you are being stingy!" "?" "Aare Farhan?" "Farhan, today was your interview, right?" "I didn't go" "I don't wanna be an engineer dad!" "What happened, you had an accident?" "Sir, umm... that building in front sir" "II had jumped off its third floor sir" "Why?" "Because I was restigated" "Why?" "Sir I had pissed on director's door when I was drunk" "That devil Rancho is still playing with your brain?" "I can't understand engineering, even if I'll be an engineer, I'll be a very bad engineer dad!" "Rancho tells a very simple thing" "Whatever you enjoy doing, make that your profession!" "Then work won't seem to be work, but a game!" "Aare..how much will you earn in that jungle?" "Dad, stipend isn't too much but I'll get to learn a lot!" "After 5 years, when you'll see your friends buying a car" "Then you'll curse yourself!" "I'll be frustrated being an engineer, then I'll curse you throughout my life!" "Dad,it's better I curse myself, right?" "Aare..people will laugh!" "They'll say that you came till final year and had quit!" "That Kapoor sir told me that you're lucky that your son is studying ing I.C.E.!" "What will he think?" "Kapoor sir didn't get AC fixed in my room!" "Making me sleep comfortably, he himself didn't sleep in the heat!" "Making me sit on his shoulders, Kapoor sir didn't take me around the zoo!" "You did all that dad!" "What you think, makes a difference!" "What Kapoor sir thinks, it doesn't make a difference to me!" "Aare, I don't even know his first name!" "Have you watched a film and come, are you performing drama?" "Stop it now, poor guy is tensed!" "God forbid, if he does something like Raju!" "Then the discussion is only over!" "Don't say anything to your son or else he'll jump from the terrace!" "No dad, I won't commit suicide" "I promise!" "That Rancho" "Whom you call a devil" "He forcibly made me put yours and mom's photo in this!" "He started saying that promise me that whenever such stupid thoughts come to your mind see this photo and think what will happen to this smile when they see your dead body!" "Dad, i want to convince you!" "But not by hanging this suicide's sword on your head!" "What will happen?" "If I become a photographer, then I'll earn less right?" "Home will be small, car will be small!" "But dad, I'll be happy" "I will be really happy!" "Whatever I do for you, I'll do it from my heart!" "Till today I have listened to whatever you said." "Today, just once, let me listen to my heart!" "Please dad!" "Dad, don't go, please!" "Return this one" "Son, how much will your professional camera cost?" "Will we get it against this laptop?" "If it costs more money, then ask me son" "Go, go son, live your life" "Your marks are consistenly poor, is there any particular reason?" "It was due to fear." "I was a bright student since childhood" "My parents thought that I would abolish our poverty!" "I started to fear!" "When i came here, I saw that there's a race, if you don't come first, no one will recognize you" "I started to fear even more!" "Fear is not good for grades, sir!" "I started wearing more rings, praying more not only praying, I started begging God" ""give me this, give me that!"" "16 bones broke, i got two months to think, then I understood!" "Sir, today i haven't told God to get me this job" "I just folded my hands and said thank you for this life" "If you guys, if you guys even reject me today, then I don't have any regrets" "Because I believe I'll somehow do something worthy with my life sir!" "See this very much frank behaviour of yours is not good for our company" "We need a diplomatic person to handle the clients and you are way too straightforward!" "But if you assure us that you can control this attitude of yours" "Then, something can happen" "Sure" "After breaking both limbs, I learnt to stand on my feet sir, with great difficulty, I got this attitude in me!" "It won't; cant happen sir!" "You keep your job, I'll keep my attitude" "I'm sorry, don't mind sir" "Stop" "I've been recruiting for the past 25 years, I've conducted a lot of interviews to get the job, people find "yes" in our "yes" itself!" "From where have you come yaar?" "Sir, I?" "How much salary will you take brother?" "Let's discuss" "Thank you sir" "Thank you" "Oh emperor you are great" "accept out gift" "Govind!" "Sir you only told if they get job, remove your moustache" "What have you done?" "I'm feeling like someone undressed me humiliated me" "I wont let you conquer, Rastogi" "You're gonna get job only when you pass the final exams but this time I'm gonna set the paper for the exam" "Dad" "That's not fair" "Everything is fair in love and war and this is World War 3" "Rastogi you're gone this time" "What are you doing here?" "Easy, easy" "You're drunk?" "Yeah yaar, had to take two, four two, four?" "two or four?" "I was in need of boldness" "For what?" "To steal this" "What is this?" "A duplicate key of Virus's office" "Question papers are in the red sealed envelope" "Dad has set by himself to fail Raju in the exam" "Take it out" "Are you mad or what?" "This is cheating yaar, no" "Everything is fair in love and war" "Ok, just tell me one thing" "Do you really feel nose comes in between if you wanted to kiss?" "Hmmm" "Hey have this dhokla, hold this," "You Gujrati people are too cute yaar, but why does your food sound so dangerous?" "Dhokla, phaphda, handhwa, thepla, kakkrah" "It seems as though they are some missiles!" "Come, come on" "Tonight bush dropped two dhoklas; 400 killed, 200 injured!" "Come on" "Aare" "I can bear with khakrah, phaphda" "But this name of your's" "Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad yuck!" "I won't change my surname after marriage, huh?" "Pia, we can't get married" "Why?" "Do you love someone?" "No" "Are you a gay?" "No" "Then why don't you propose to me?" "Are you impotent?" "Then prove it, prove it" "Pia, I'm not" "Hey, stop, stop, stop, stop!" "Aare, what happened?" "Aare, we haven't informed Pia at all!" "Oh stop now, my bladder's bursting!" "Oh shut up yaar!" "Are you in touch with her?" "No yaar" "But I have her landline number" "Then dial it, I'll stop" "Yeah stop, stop, stop" "Hello!" "No place to piss in this country?" "Hello, yeah is Pia there?" "She's not there sir" "Ok where will she be availiable?" "In the hospital?" "Sir, why will she go to hospital today?" "It's her marriage today!" "She's gone to Manali!" "Pia marriage is over!" "It's not yet over, see, it's 6 hours away!" "If we speed up, then we'll surely reach before the marriage vows!" "What do you say?" "Now if you have already thought about it partner, then take a u-turn!" "No u-turn!" "Straight to Ladakh, we'll meet Rancho and come back.." "Friday, I have a meeting with Phunsukh Wangdu" "Come, come, sit in the car" "If I miss it, you know what will happen!" "The Japanese will get in" "They are offering him a first name in the company" "Phunshuk and Fujiashi, profit hearings are" "Pia weds Suhas?" "!" "and thanks for the suit!" "Yaar Virus will suffer a heart attack" "Hello, hello" "Whenever his daughters are getting married, we come off to ruin it!" "Ok listen, I'll handle Pia, you pull out the price tag!" "Farhan!" "We found Rancho, Pia!" "Is it for 107?" "Yes sir!" "Give it here" "How much time do you take yaar?" "Sorry sir" "Come on, go" "House keeping, sir!" "Come in!" "More, more, amore" "Quick, quick, iron my Sherwani!" "More, more, amore" "Aare, we found Rancho, still, will you marry this donkey?" "You're mad, Farhan!" "Don't fool yourself Pia!" "You love Rancho even today, and eating these dhoklas remembering him!" "More,more, amore" "He's a dog's tail, put it inside a pipe for 12 years, when you remove it, it'll still remain bent!" "Shut up Farhan!" "Suhas is a changed man!" "Now he never talks about brands and prices!" "My 1.5 lakh Sherwani!" "Why do you people eat chutney?" "Sir I'll do something sir!" "What, what will you do?" "Sir, sir, we get such shirts and sherwanis everyday in our laundry sir!" "I'll clean it within 2minutes sir!" "Sir, one minute sir!" "Get it soon!" "But its too late now, Farhan!" "Pia, Pia, come, it's getting late!" "Come on" "Pia, I'm Raju, don't shout, people will kill me" "Where is Suhas?" "Aare, he had come from house-keeping, he took away the sherwani!" "Go inside and send Suhas" "The hymns are going on Pia, if I get up and go then everyone will be furious yaar!" "Yes farhan, tell me" "Car is ready at the gate" "I'm saying, take Pia and run!" "Aare don't move yaar" "Sir?" "Sherwani?" "You are here?" "Yes" "Who's taking the vows over there?" "Vows?" "If the vows get over, then our marriage will be over, I'm already married Pia!" "Let's go!" "There are so many people over here, all of them will laugh!" "Aare, because people laugh, so will you suicide?" "Aare.." "Rastogi?" "!" "Pia, people will gossip for two days and forget it!" "But today if you complete this marriage, you never forget that car was at the gate!" "We had come to take you to Rancho, but only because you feared from people" "You got married to this donkey!" "House keeping?" "Yaar Pia, there is a small, minor problem" "What?" "We don't know if Rancho's married or not" "What?" "!" "Aare, it wouldn't have happened yaar, it wouldn't have happened!" "and if it would've happened?" "Then we'll drop you back!" "Aare, don't get angry, have this biscuit" "Hand made biscuit from San Francisco" "Idiot" "From where did he come?" "Ignore it,ignore it" "You eat the biscuits, eat" "It's very good" ""Aal iz well, aal iz well"!" "Till yesterday I was a noble citizen of this country" "But in the last 24 hours, I had got an emergency landing of a plane almost immersed Shyamaldas's soul in the gutter and kidnapped a bride from her wedding all for that idiot Rancho but even that idiot gave out his heart for his friends" "he had entered Ravan's territory, to steal a question paper for Raju search for a red sealed envelope ok come" "He was very afraid, that if Raju failed, he'll again go and do a high jump!" "but even we were very principled robbers!" "We had sworn that we'd steal the paper only for Raju, we won't even see it ourselves!" "Aare yaar, where has he hidden it?" "Aare yaar, searching like this, it'll be good morning" "Rancho, ask Pia" "Where are you, since then I'm calling you?" "Pia, your phone" "Give it to me, one minute Pia, Pia" "Jiju, when we say "Aal iz well", it kicks!" "It kicked!" "You heard?" "Pia, your phone" "We got it, Rancho" "Hello?" "Aare at least call me sometimes!" "Make a copy, make a xerox copy, quick!" "Take it" "Put it wherever we got it from" "Carefully!" "Oye where have you been, huh?" "Take this" "What is it?" "Enjoy" "Question paper" "Virus had set it by himself to make you fail the exam" "Weird friends I've got teaching how to live straight forward first then making me do things that are odd no, today if I pass, it'll be on my own ability!" "Otherwise it's ok if I fail!" "Idiot!" "Idiot won my heart!" "My heart said I'll make this idiot my brother-in-law" "Umm, umm, then I controlled my emotion!" "Go, go" "No si,r no sir please.." "You had come to change the system!" "You'll piss on my door" "Bloody rascals" "Sorry sir" "You are restigated, if you are'nt gone by morning, I'll call the police" "I'll call the police!" "Rascals!" "Rascals all of you!" "How did he get my offic key?" "I gave him the keys dad" "I wish I had given it to my brother" "He would have been alive today" "Stop it Pia" "What do you think?" "Brother fell off the train and died?" "Shut up Pia!" "You decided that he'll be an engineer" "Did you ever ask him what he wanted to be?" "How much you pressurised brother, dad" "He thought it was easier to die than to give an entrance exam!" "What is she saying?" "Dad, you go into the room!" "You get into your room!" "Pia stop it, what are you doing Pia!" "I'm telling you right" "Brother wanted to study literature, he wanted to be a writer" "But he couldn't write anything more than this suicide note!" "Pia, hide that letter, please!" "Till when will I hide it sister?" "Once" "Only once if you would have told him" "If you can do engineering then quit it!" "Do whatever you like!" "Then today brother would have been alive, dad!" "He cannot suicide" "You're right dad, it wasnt a suicide" "It was a murder!" "In many areas, the roads are immersed in water, there is total traffic jam!" "Dad," "Dad!" "Mona" "Aare, I told you to go back right?" "Then why are you coming behind us?" "Why, is this your mom's road?" "Please help, we are desperate here!" "Is there only one ambulance in the city?" "Get an ambulance from some other hospital!" "The whole city is immersed in water, sir" "We can't do anything!" "No.." "Pia..that.." "Hey Mona, what happened?" "Rancho, pia!" "Rancho, it's impossible to reach over here, so do as i say!" "You guys are not understanding!" "Get water bags, drive fast!" "You're not under" "They disconnected!" "Monaa!" "Monaa!" "Be careful, be careful" "Turn on the light, turn on the light!" "Table, table, able-tennis table" "Raju, switch on the webcam!" "Yaa" "Ya Pia" "Hello Raju, where is sister?" "Show me!" "Yeah..hold on, hold on dont worry.. hold on" "See this Pia?" "Sister, everything will be alright!" "I'm near you, ok?" "Pia I'm dying" "Rancho, when there were no hospitals and doctors in this world even then babies were born" "You guys will carry on sister's delivery" ""Aal iz well, aal iz well"" "How dare you?" "!" "What are you guys doing?" "Dad, don't come in between!" "Please stay out of this, ok?" "!" "Farhan, you go get towels and scissors" "Millimeter, get cloth, drying clip, and hot water" "Rancho you cover sister" "Sister, push" "Push, push, come on" "Push" "Keep quiet, I'm unable to push" "Rancho, see if crowning is happening?" "Crowning means?" "Go get that diagram" "Rancho, see if the head is coming out" "Come on Rancho, quickly" "Gooooooo" "Go, go, go, go Rancho!" "Go, come on!" "No, no crowning." "It's not coming, no" "Sister, please push!" "Mona" "Mona" "She's tired Pia" "Wake her up" "If she doesn't push, then it'll be a big problem" "Vacuum cup has to be put, Pia from where will they get a vacuum cup over there?" "What is a vacuum cup?" "How does it look?" "What do they do with it?" "I'll show you" "If the mother gets tired and is unable to push then this cup is put on the baby's head the suction pump creates vacuum and this cup sticks on the baby's head then the baby is pulled out" "I can make this..." "I can make it!" "How?" "Vacuum cleaner sir" "Vacuum cleaner?" ".." "Yes sir, vacuum cleaner" "But vacuum cleaner's pressure is too much Rancho" "I'll control the pressure" "Is there a vacuum cleaner over there?" "It's there in my office" "Farhan go soon and get it from sir's office" "Take the key" "Mona, push Mona, come on push!" "What happened?" "What happened?" "Yeah Pia" "Hello, Raju what happened?" "The light is gone Pia" "Oh god!" "Now how will the vacuum cleaner work?" "Farhan, you get the vacuum cleaner and I'll get the light" "How?" "Millimeter, get virus out, fast come on" "Come Virus, get out, get out" "Aare not this Virus yaar, my Virus, the inverter that I had made" "That?" "Go get that quickly" "Oh ok, that one, i understand!" "Raju, wake everyone in the hostel" "And tell them that we want car battery, wires, tool kit and vaccuum gauge, come on!" "Come out, there's an emergency in the common room" "Where is Rancho?" "Sir, sir, sir, here sir" "Everyone keep the batteries over here, come on, quickly!" "and the wires" "Raju, turn off all switches and connect this inverter to the mains" "Take this" "Rancho, vacuum cleaner" "Farhan, that camera cleaning thing, what do you call it?" "Plower, plower, go and get it quickly" "Rancho, take this plower" "Pull the vaccuum and put it on the pipe, over here!" "Rancho, it's done!" "Are all the switches off?" "Now turn on only the table tennis table's and computer's light on!" "Raju, turn on the computer, fast!" "Help me, connect this, put it in this!" "Pia, come quick, Pia, come quick" "Love you Rancho" "Farhan, turn it on!" "Yes!" "Pia, how much must the suction be?" "Not more than 0.5 Rancho" "Farhan, 0.5" "Cover up" "Yes 0.5" "Ok" "Delivery using vacuum cleaner, I haven't seen this in 20 yrs of my career!" "Farhan, off it.." "Yeah" "Raju, get on the table, see me" "Push the baby down like this, like this!" "Farhan, turn it on" "Come on sister, push, you can do it!" "Come on Mona, push, come on!" "Think about "Champ", for "Champ", come on!" "Come on Mona, Mona push!" "It's coming, it's coming!" "Come on sister, you can do it!" "Farhan, turn it off" "Yeah yeah, I turned it off" "Put two clips and cut the umbical chord" "Farhan, get two clips fast!" "Put it on the umbical chord and get scissors" "Careful, careful" "Get the towel, towel" "Pia, Pia why isn't it cryin?" "Hey" "Hey "Champ"" "Rancho rub its back" "Hey "Champ"" "No, nothing is happening" "Blow air into its mouth" "Come on" "Come on "Champ"" "Nothing is happening" "Quiet Mona, quiet" "Say "All iz well", say "aal iz well"" "It kicked!" "What?" "!" "It kicked!" "Say "All iz well, aal iz well"" ""aal iz well"" ""aal iz well"" ""aal iz well"" ""aal iz well"" ""aal iz well"" ""aal iz well"" "Yeah!" "At that time if Virus would have told that his grandson would have been an engineer..." "I would have raped that idiot!" "But when that idiot opened his mouth, then a miracle happened!" "Solid you kick, will you become a footballer or what?" "Become, become whatever your heart says" "Stop!" "Where are you going?" "I'm not finished with you..." "On the first day of college, you had asked me a question, remember?" "that why don't they use a pencil in space?" "If the tip of the pencil breaks in space, then it will be revolving under the action of gravity" "It can get into someone's eyes, it can get into someone's nose" "It can get into the instrument panel" "You were wrong!" "You were wrong!" "You cannot be right all the time!" "You understand?" "Yes sir" "This was a very important invention, you understand?" "Yes sir" "My director had told me when any extraordinary student comes" "Go, go, go...go study..." "Pass the exams and go away from here" "And now student of the year:" "Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad" "Sir, one photo sir!" "I wanted to capture all these memories in my camera and take it with me!" "On that day, everyone was hugging each other, getting emotional and making promises" "That we'll stay in touch, we'll surely meet up once in a year!" "Who knew that we were seeing Rancho for the last time?" "Yaar, untie him!" "I'll sue you all in American court!" "Raju" "This kinda school can only can be made by that idiot Rancho!" "But where is he?" "See there" "Go in creatures, go" "Don't piss over here!" "You want a beating, huh?" "Ha ha ha" "We got him!" "That idiot is some where around, come on!" "Brother, where will we find Rancchoddas?" "Is his name Rancchoddas?" "!" "Rancho" "Chhote, chhote... chhote" "Aare, what's his name ultimately?" "Aare, cool down, cool down" "Come with me" "Where, where is Rancho?" "Rancho, Rancho..." "Farhan, do you know, he has read every book written by you!" "See this" "Raju, he reads your blogs everyday!" "He tells the children about your research very proudly!" "Do you remember your helmet sister Pia?" "It was stolen right?" "Who are you?" "And how do you remember all our names?" "Didn't you recognize me?" "No" "How will you recogzine, now that millimeter has become centimeter!" "Oye oye oye!" "Idiot!" "What centimeter, you have become kilometer!" "But what are you doing over here?" "For the first time, I got a letter with my name on it." "I found a train ticket in that it was written inside that if you wanna study then board the train!" "And I boarded it" "Idiot Rancho" "Where is that idiot?" "Furjee, take this and go!" "You come in my dreams everyday on a scooter wearing a bride's costume!" "Instead of the veil, you take off your helmet!" "And you come near me to kiss me!" "Aaaaaaah... ouch!" "Couldn't you tell us and go?" "Ummmm... no..." "Ummmm... sorry" "Did you get married?" "What?" ".." "What?" "..." "No.." "You?" "Almost, idiot!" "Then?" "Then what?" "Do you love someone?" "Hmm.." "Yeah" "Who?" "You...!" "Did you see, the nose doesn't come in between, stupid!" "Yes, that's right!" "Idiot Rancho!" "Hi, Farhan!" "Aare keep your hi to yourself!" "Aare listen to me!" "No, you listen to me" "Aare.. you listen to me..." "listen to me!" "No, you listen to me, I'll explain everything" "Hey Raju" "Idiot!" "Look here" "Aeee idiot" "Hit him, hit him, two-three from my side aswell" "Because of you, what all I had to become.. you know?" "This idiot got glasses!" "Come.. get up idiot.. get up" "Hey idiot!" "Having fun idiots?" "Hey.. hi Chatur" "Rancchoddas Chanchad" "Namaste Masterji" "Where have you reached?" "You have become a teacher in the village, eh?" "A for apple, B for ball" "We boarded the bus together right" "But your train went away in reverse" "Straight to primary teacher from engineering" "Ha ha ha ha whats the salary Chanchad?" "Tell me 5000 rupees, huh?" "For me, that's like 100 dollars" "My son's pocket money is more than your salary!" "Hey stop this nonsense" "He used to do nonsense, he wanted to change the education system" "He wanted to change the world" "Now he changes childrens' diapers over here!" "Will you break his teeth or shall I break it?" "Idiot" "Hey let it be!" "Do you remember, I had told u" "One day you'll cry and I'll laugh" "Sign over here, accept it, that you lost and I won!" "The declaration of defeat; unbelivable yaar, Chatur, unbelivable!" "Hey, that is Virus's pen?" "How did you get it?" "You stole it?" "Umm.. now what shall I say yaar?" "This is for winners.. not losers!" "No problem, if you have any difficulty in school and need a donation call my assistant, eh!" "A for apple, B for ball" "He hasn't changed at all yaar" "Yaar ignore it, ignore it!" "Leave him yaar, he'll keep saying anything" "Leave it, the good news is your name is not Rancchoddas Chanchad" "Imagine after marriage I would be Pia Chanchad!" "Yuck!" "By the way, what's your real name?" "Phunshukh Wangdu" "Wangdu?" "Pia Wangdu?" "No.. that means you are a scientist?" "That means you have 400 patents in your name?" "I won't change my surname after marriage" "That means you are Chatur's Wangdu?" "Are the Japanese looking for you?" "I don't like wangdu!" "I think so..." "Yaar tell me one thing, are you a scientist or a teacher?" "I'm a scientist but I also teach children" "That means you are "THE" Phunshukh Wangdu?" "Yes man, yes" "Oye Silencer!" "Hey Chathur come back!" "Stop, stop, stop" "Take van, huh?" "He won't stop that way!" "I'll stop him!" "Mr. Wangdu, I can't believe you called!" "I'm sorry Mr. Chatur but I can't sign a deal with your company!" "What sir, what happened sir?" "Aare how shall I sign yaar.. you took away my pen!" "What pen sir?" "I didn't get you" "The one thats in your hand;" "Virus's pen!" "Virus's pen?" "Mr. Wangdu?" "Ya tell me Chatur!" "A for Apple, B for Ball, L for Lucky!" "Yaar, he has been raped!" "You got me" "You got me Rancho" "I mean Mr. Wangdu!" "Totally flowed me!" "Good one!" "I hope our personal problems are not going to affect our deal" "Hey Chatur, over here, here" "I was just joking yaar, I knew it from within that you'll do something in life!" "No.., you're lying?" "No, no, no, no.." "I'm telling you, I swear!" "Rancho 100, Chatur zero!" "You win, I lose." "You don't believe me?" "Aare yaar!" "Oh emperor, you are great Accept the gift" "I'll give you a free advice Mr. Wangdu... run!" "Run, run" "Hey rancho, I'll lose my job yaar, I have small-small kids" "Baba Rancchoddas used to say rightly" "Kids, be self-efficeient, self-efficient" "Then success will come behind you"