""BRAZILIAN GUERRILLA NUTS"" "Brazil, 1970." "A military dictatorship was in power." "All the military could think about was power." "Poweroverthe students, poweroverthe workers... poweroverthe press." "Those were tough days." "It was the year Brazil became third-time soccerchampion... in Mexico World Cup." "Third-time champion is a sort of fifth-time champion of those days." "This film is about all that stuff." "CENSORSHIP CERTIFICATE EXPLICIT IMPOTENCE SCENES" "FORBIDDEN FOR THOSE UNDER 7 INCHES" "NEWS FROM THE PLANET" "Attended by military, civil and religious authorities..." "Passo Fundo, in southern Brazil hosted... the State's 14th Cattle Show." "The award ceremony... confirmed the excellence of the Brazilian herd... one of the most bovine in the world!" "However, an incident caused injury to the cow Mimosa..." "His Excellency the President's formerwet nurse... although this didn't spoil the event's success." "In Rio de Janeiro, a match was held... between the team of the First Reverse GearCavalry Regiment... and a squad of dangerous subversive terrorists." "The two teams, that have been playing each other since 1964... provided fans with a nail-biting match." "The olive-green team dominated the game... showing great energy and discipline." "The great Armed Forces goalkeeper... displayed great agility with his relentless saves." "At the finalwhistle, the score stood at 25 x 0... in favorof the Armed Forces... who once again dealt a crushing blow... to the unruly team of the dangerous Communist subversives." "Without the presence of civil..." "MURDERERS military and religious authorities..." "MORE BUDGET FOR "IDUCATION" was held in Rio de Janeiro... a demonstration by thugs who insist on, at all costs... imposing their exotic, strange ideologies on our society." "Happily, our police force arrived in time... to enforce the pacific nature of the Brazilian people." ""DOWM" WITH DICTATORSHIP" "STEAK HOUSE" "MÉDICI NOW" "Go on, get out!" "Hurry up, you wimp!" "Lucky we had the escort!" "The game's probably started, you slug!" "Dodozinha, you know I'm not really into football." "Just watching them run around makes me tired." "Oh, Jairzinho must be on the pitch by now... with those tight little shorts." "I love football players." "It's the final decision of IX World Cup." "Brazil in yellow shirts, cobalt blue shorts and white socks." "Italy in blue shirts, white shorts and blue socks." "The final of the IX World Cup begins." "What, there's only sausage?" "What sort of steak house is this?" "Where's the steak, the "farofa", the French fries?" "This is General Miranda Imbiruçu, of the Brazilian Army." " Make sure he gets good service!" " Certainly." "Great!" "You must be the new waiter." "You get all sorts in here." "Well, we'll fix your... ghastly appearance later." "Now grab that apron... because, with the game, it's madness in here today!" "I can't stand it anymore, everyone on my back!" " But, comrade..." " Not comrade." "I am not your comrade." "I already have one in Bagé." "You mean you have a comrade too?" "I could tell you liked a brochette." "But put on the apron and go and serve the general's table." "His wife's on the verge of sending in the troops." "Here, take it." "The general's table?" "Leave it to me, comrade." "Cool, groovy." "Full house, right?" "Peixoto Carlos, hot man, your days of anonymity are over!" "In fact, I'm gonna end my anonymity right now." ""For my friend, the waiter... kiss from Peixoto Carlos!"" "There's my autograph, man!" "Thanks for everything!" "Wow, I'm already driving the fans wild!" "A header, goal!" "Goal!" "Thank you, thank you." "I know I'm the greatest." "Now I'd like you to shut up... and be silent for a moment because I'm gonna sing a song... of mine, which I also wrote." "If you wanna be mine" "But think my prick is small" "You're wrong, honey That was my duodenum" " Just shake it" " Shut up, asshole!" "Stop that singing, I'm trying to watch the game!" "Son, come here." "That cow's dripping on my husband..." "General Miranda Imbiruçu, of the Brazilian Army!" "Oh, but that's no cow, Mother." "Can't you see?" "It's a bull!" "Oh, don't be so square, Mother." "I've seen plenty bigger than that." "Holy cow, I need something to relax." "Hey, little roach..." "I'm gonna smoke you all up." "Sit down now, my dear." "Someone might end up seeing your panties." "Dad, if anyone wants to see my panties... they'll have to look in my drawer back home." "I don't wear panties anymore." "Oh!" "Ah!" "Try further over here." " Oh!" "Ah!" "Now the other side!" " Bastard!" "Get your hands outta there!" "See, honey, that's why I tell you to wear a bra." " Mirandinha, you fool... are you just gonna sit there?" "That's not what the revolution was for!" " Goal!" "Goal!" " Hey, little roach, you're heavy stuff!" "Must be from Jamaica." "Gee, what am I here for?" "Ah, hell knows." "Oh, there goes..." "Perpetrators of carnivorous genocide!" "Eaters of innocent cows and pigs... your days are over!" "Long live the vegetarian revolution!" "Mirandinha, you wimp... get out of there and arrest that crazy Communist!" "Go on, I'll cover you from behind!" "Dad..." "My God, my husband's been killed!" "General Miranda Imbiruçu... of the Brazilian Army, has been killed!" "It was that crazy hippie who doesn't like steak!" " Arrest him!" " It wasn't him, it was the singer." " But I didn't do anything!" " Help!" "No, but you're a lousy singer!" "No, I saw everything!" "It was the guy with the beard!" "Get him!" "Grab him and take him to my place!" "Comrade vegetarian, comrade singer... now we're in the same boat." "Come on, let's go." "This dictatorship mini-blouse was "expopriated" and will be used... in the struggle for the proletarian worker's revolution!" "Wait, wait!" "Now what, man?" "Where are we gonna hide?" "It's obvious none of you has a place." "I have, man!" "Look!" "No, comrade." "Not a brace, a place!" "Forget it, let's go!" " Wow!" "Cool!" " Far out." "Great poster, man." "I'm a big fan of Cat Stevens too." "Not Cat Stevens, comrade." "That's the great Che." "Ernesto Che Guevara, killed in the jungles of Bolivia... by the reactionary troops of the American Yankee imperialism my idol and supreme guide." " Gee, some cool cat, man." "Comrades, there is something I haven't told you." "I share this apartment with my comrade mother." "Frederico Eugênio, son... you went out without your cardigan again." "You'll get cold." "Gee, Mom, I told you I renounced that bourgeois name." "My name is now Wladimir Illitch Stalin Tse-tung Guevara." "And these are my new comrades." "Ah, so you brought your playmates round for tea?" "Then I'd better go and make some special milkshakes and a big sandwich." " Great!" "Comrades, our meeting in the steak house will make history." "I feel that destiny has united us... so that together we shall overthrow the dictatorship, comrades!" "This is the only way we'll be able to build a more just society." " And with much more justice." " Hey, man..." "I don't give a damn whether society is gonna be more just or not." "I just want one thing, to finish off the king of Brazilian music!" "Gee, man, what have you got against..." "Don't say his name, man." "I can't stand that guy's name!" "I still remember as if it were yesterday... the day I boarded that bus... in Cachoeira do Itapemirim." " Peixoto Carlos, nice to meet you." " Nice to meet you, Roberto." " So, man, you going to Rio de Janeiro?" " Yeah, I'm gonna try my luck in the big city." " Have you got a job there?" "No, but anything which comes my way is fine by me." "How about you?" "Ah, I'm gonna be a great famous singer." "By the way, when I'm up there in the hit parade... give me a call, and I'll help you out, ok?" " Wanna hear a song of mine?" " Sure, man." "My little boozer Always hitting the gin" "How I miss my wrinkles Lovely wrinkles" "From drinking so much I lost them" "It's all right, I guess." " I prefer romantic songs." " Romantic?" "I do romantic songs too, man!" "Listen!" "Been hanging around so long But now I've gotta get going" "The time's come, it's now" "With you I've gotta get it up I've gotta get it up" " That song's a little down, man." " There's another... really cool!" "Listen!" "That girl's got balls" "Got balls Got balls" " Man, girls don't have balls." " Really?" "Damn." "Bitch." " She fooled me." " Hey, man, I'll tell you something." "Your songs are a bit square, but you're okay." "I think you should try commerce." "Don't worry, all that matters is I'll keep you right here... in my heart." "You're a friend of faith." "Friend of faith, comrade brother." "I hate that guy, man." "You hate the king, such a cool guy... a plant lover, who talks to them... just because he doesn't like your songs, man?" "You're so innocent, Denílson." "You've no malice." "He pretended not to like them and then used them himself, see?" "But that's what our world of show biz is like... dog eats dog." "Oh, I see." "I went to an orgy like that once... everyone eating each other." "Far out, man!" "Your attention!" "A gang of terrorists... has just raided a steak house in Rio de Janeiro." "A bomb exploded injuring General Miranda Imbiruçu." "The police already have a picture of these dangerous subversives." "See?" "I told you I'd be famous one day!" "Look, I'm on TV!" "So, now I'm a really famous guy, right?" "I've a packed schedule, loads of chicks to screw... full agenda, right?" "I'm off now." "Excuse me, thanks." "You're not going anywhere, comrade." "They're after us." "Now we're in this together to the end." "We'll found a revolutionary group... to put an end to this bloody, bloodthirsty dictatorship!" " Down with the dictatorship!" " Down with red meat!" "Down with that impostor who says he's the king of Brazilian music!" "Oh, no!" "Oh, no!" "No one speaks badly of the king in this house." "Let's get on with this snack... 'cause you can't overthrow a dictatorship on an empty stomach." "Afterwiping out the Italian team..." "Captain Carlos Alberto Torres raises the cup." "The World Cup is ours." "Brazil is invincible." "How come I never thought of that before?" "Comrades, I know what we must do... to demoralize for good this military dictatorship perpetrated by the Army." " Hey, champions!" " Brazil!" "Today is a great day." "The day our heroes, third-time champions, arrived in Brazil... triumphantly bringing with them the Jules Rimet cup... conquered not only definitively but forever in Mexico!" " Champions!" "Champions!" " Champions!" "Champions!" " Thank you, thank you." "Wow, madness." "That crowd is packed with people, man." "Holy cow, helluva trip!" "Come on, comrade Denílson." "We've got no time to lose." "We've got a mission." "Major Gomes at your service, sergeant!" "I bring express orders from General Avelar... you and your crew must go immediately... to a fire in the suburb of Tatuapé!" " Yes, sir!" "But, major, we're escorting the Brazilian team." "The vehicle will remain under my command!" " Obey the general's order!" " Yes, sir!" "Get out of the way!" "My God, what a pain." "This traffic won't move." "Excuse me, can you get these people out of the way?" "I'm in a hurry." "My dear, can't you see it isn't allowed to drive through here today?" " Officer... not even a cute chick wearing really short mini-skirt... and no panties?" "Well, in that case, I think we can make an exception." "Let this young lady through!" "Hey, you, get out of the way!" "It's those guys from the steak house!" "Hey, Souza!" "How long have you been a sergeant?" "Hell knows!" "Gee, and who is this General Avelar?" "Never heard of him." "And isn't Tatuapé in São Paulo?" "Yeah." "Didn't you find that bearded major strange... and those two hairy guys?" "I never saw that in the Army before." "Brother, it's their dictatorship." "They can do whatever they want." "If they wanna go around wearing beards, lipstick or a negligee... it's their problem!" "They do the ordering, I obey." "GUANABARA WELCOMES GLORIOUS TEAM" "This is far out!" "Groovy!" "Marvelous!" "We managed to get rid of the crowd!" " Great!" " But now what?" "What are we gonna do with the players?" "This is very strange." "He's driving too fast, see?" "He's crazy." "The crowd's been left behind." "God damn!" "Hold on, captain!" "Hey, buddy, the speed limit is 60 around here!" "What's the rush?" "You're not gonna put out a fire, are you?" "Leave it to me, comrades." "I have a plan." "We killed Pelé!" "Hey, driver, don't make a weapon out of your vehicle." "The victim might be me." "You know nothing about driving, do you?" "Easy, Comrade Pelé." "Easy, comrades of the national squad." "We'll take you home soon." "There's been a small problem." "Everyone'll have to get down and push the truck." "Pelé, you're lucky." "You needn't get down, you're already down!" "This is ours." "Comrade, I'll keep the cup here in the truck." "No, wait a minute." "I'm the team captain, understand?" "Only I can keep the cup." "No one else, understand?" "That's right." "Wait, you're a captain, and I'm a major." "See that, young man?" "I'm your superior." "So no arguing." " Or do you wanna be tortured?" " No, wait." "Hey, what's going on?" "What's happening?" "What's that?" "My goals, aren't they worth anything?" "Man, torture really does work." "All together!" "Let's go!" "Come on, Brazil!" "Brazil!" "Push, team!" "That could be a song." "Gee, that's absurd!" "The firemen left the world champions here, on foot?" "!" "There must be a fire at the house of someone very important, right?" "THE DICTATORSHIP'S LONG NIGHT" "Come on, you wimp, we're always the last to arrive." "Hey, Dolores, what's the rush?" "I don't know what you see in these high command meetings." "Just boring old men droning on... and these half-naked women doing the boogie." "One moment, one moment!" "Excuse me, but apart from the half-naked women... females of the feminine sex are not allowed." "What?" "!" "What?" "!" "Have you lost all sense of danger, young man?" "Do you know who you're talking to?" "We didn't have the revolution... just to be barred by some shitty soldier!" "Easy, Dodozinha, he's right." "We'd better go." "Let's go?" "You shut up, I'm arguing with this young man here!" "Get out of the way!" "Get out of the way!" "Or perhaps you'd like to try the stick?" " No, no!" "General Manso, the phone's ringing." "The red phone?" "My direct line to the president!" " But, general, the phone's blue." " Idiot!" "Red is a Commie color!" "You think I'd have Commie-colored phone?" "!" "Hello, Mr. President." "Certainly, Mr. President." "Don't worry." "As soon as the parade finishes, the players will bring me the cup." "Tomorrow morning, the cup will be at the palace, Mr. President." "Would you like a drink?" "Cuba-libre?" "Cuba-libre?" "No, I wouldn't, it's out of the question, I won't have it." "The presence of a Communist drink in this place... is a provocation to the Brazilian Armed Forces!" "I'll have you put on the stick!" " No, no!" " Private Stick!" " Not again!" " He's all yours!" "Yes, sir!" "S... tick!" ""GAL." COSTA TONIGHT Hey, Dolores... there's a Gal Costa concert on tonight?" "But isn't she that hairy hippie friend of those Commie musicians?" "No, you idiot, it's a concert by General Costa... the biggest name in Brazilian Military Music." "Hello, all you guys in the barracks!" "Hello, crazy people in high command!" "I want everyone shaking their bones." "Uh, uh, uh So tough" "Uh, uh, uh So tough" "So tough being a hard line soldier" "Spending your life arresting Commies" "To beat and punch without censor" "And then make them disappear without a trace" "Uh, uh, uh So tough" "Uh, uh, uh So tough" "So tough the dictatorship's long night" "Paint trees and torture Wash toilets" "Shine boots with courage" "In defense of Brazilian territory" "Your attention!" "I bring an ultra-secret and confidential message... authorized only for 5-star generals or higher." "All others must immediately begin... the security procedure for secret messages." "Standard procedure begun." "This message will self-destruct in 15 seconds." "The Jules Rimet cup has been stolen... by a group of dangerous terrorist subversives." " How long's it been?" " Thirteen, fourteen..." "As the commander of the important mission... to recover the Jules Rimet cup, I'd like to say..." "You'll say nothing, Manso!" "The only ones scared of you are your little generals here!" "You're not taking charge of this operation." "My husband will command this operation, General Miranda Imbiruçu of the Brazilian Army!" " Me?" "!" "Are you crazy, Dolores?" " Chasing Commies is very stressful." " Don't be dumb, Mirandinha." "This is our chance." "You find the cup, get famous... become the next president, and I'll be first lady." "But, Mrs. Dolores..." "There'll be no discussion!" "Absolutely not!" "I've made my decision and decided." "Enough beating around the bush." "Let's go, Mirandinha!" "What a fantastic woman." "What a female!" "The world cup is ours, comrades!" "It's our first victory against the dictatorship." " Long live the VRM!" " VRM?" "What the hell's VRM?" "Vladimir's Revolutionary Movement." " Why Vladimir?" " Because the movement's mine!" "That's not fair." "As a member of the artistic class, I should have been consulted." "That name, VRM, it's no good, man." "And anyway, why "V"?" "I thought Wladimir was with "W"." "You don't understand anything about dictatorship, comrade." "Do you really think I'd use my real name?" "Wladimir with "V" is my code-name to fool the repressive forces... of the repression." "Holy cow, what a lot of smoke!" "It looks like my bedroom!" "The vehicle used in the operation is no longer operational." "We shall have to continue the revolutionary struggle... on foot!" "Comrade Peixoto Carlos, give me the cup we took from the dictatorship." "Groovy, man." "Now that we have the cup... the military will have to meet our demands." "Sure thing, man!" "We must also demand an end to racism... in Brazilian music." "The only reason I never became famous... was because the movement wouldn't allow a black singer!" " Hold on, you're not black." " Yeah, that was another drawback." "Hey, you six." "I recognize you." "You're artists, aren't you?" "Wait a minute." "You're blind drunk." "You must be mistaking us for someone else." "No, I'm not, it's you." "There's a picture of you on that poster." "Only artists appear on posters!" "Look!" ""Want... "" "Hold on, comrade alcoholic, I'll read that." ""Wanted dangerous subversive terrorists." "Dead or alive." "Preferably... dead. "" " Dead?" "!" "We're done for!" " They won't just kill." "They'll arrest, then beat us and torture us... with red hot iron bars, damn it!" "Gee, tear down that poster before someone sees it!" "You tearing down poster?" "Then I hope you're not in a hurry." "Look." "WANTED Oh, my God!" "Look!" "Look!" "Lh, look!" "It's us, it's us!" " My dear God." " Now what?" "What are we to do?" "Young man, why don't you get a ride... with that lady who's been following you all this time?" "What a coincidence meeting you here." "Oh, you're that chick with no panties... from the steak house, waving all that meat about?" "You and your car are hereby "expopriated"... to be used in the fight against the dictatorship!" "From now on, you and your car belong to the VRM..." "Vladimir's Revolutionary Movement." "Gee, there you go again with that awful name, man." "Yeah, that name's terrible." "We should think up a more fashion name." "I know it's none of my business." "I know it's your revolutionary group... but couldn't you discuss this some other time... and hurry up and decide where we're going?" "Yeah, where are we going, Wladimir?" "I couldn't care less." "When it comes to naming the movement, my name stinks." "Now when you need a hiding place, it's:" ""Where are we going, Wladimir?" Go to hell!" "Sorry to interrupt again." "I know it's not my terrorist group... but I also know a great place for us to hide." "All right, we really do need a nice safe, cozy hiding place... to rest up till we take up the fight again... and finally overthrow Capitalism!" "Let's go!" "I must be sitting on something, man." "What a weird bag." "Hey, don't insult my bag." "It's made of real straw." "It's from Jamaica!" "Wait." "If it's from Jamaica, it must be good stuff." "Guys, this revolutionary life of yours is so exciting." " This fight for freedom, this defiance." " Shut up!" "You're nothing but a daughter of the middle-class bourgeoisie... which is handing Brazil over to the American Yankee imperialism from abroad!" " Ah!" "Oh!" "You gave me goosebumps!" "Wow, baby, you say such beautiful things." "Ah, but I bet you say it to all the girls." "Withdraw your bourgeois fingers from my revolutionary member!" "Nothing must distract me from the fight for ultimate victory!" " And we die" " And we die" " On highway BR-3" " On highway BR-3" "A rocket tears through the sky" "Crossing space And Jesus Christ" "Damn them, they stole my song!" "I wrote that, man!" "Only it was a different highway and the words more instructive." "Listen." "We run" "We run" "On highway BR-101" "Which borders the Brazilian coast" "Crossing the Atlantic mountain range" "There's a dream Colorful trip" "Sometimes start" "Trouble!" "The men!" "Holy cow!" "We've had it!" "I've got to get rid of this!" "Come on, come on!" "My God." "Or rather, not my God because I'm an atheist." " We're in the repression clutches!" " Out!" "Get out!" "Easy, baby, leave it to me, I'll sort this out." "Hand me my bag." "Get my papers." "They must be there back." "Your papers were in the bag?" "I'll only be able to give them back tomorrow." "Do you have an emergency triangle?" "Yes, sir." "Then show it to me." "It must be here somewhere." "This car sure has a big trunk." "You can fit quite a lot in it." "All right, girl, that's fine." "I've seen the triangle." "You can go." "Thanks!" "Nice place." "We'll "expopriate" this bourgeois property for the revolution!" " Great." "I don't know..." "I'm not sure my father will like this expropriation." "He loves his roses." "You know how generals are." " They have funny ways." " You're a general's daughter?" "Yes, she was at the steak house with the general with no panties." "The general had no panties?" "Wait." "How come you brought us right into the enemy's lair?" "Easy, baby!" "My folks haven't been here for ages." "There's no way they're gonna show up just now." "Mirandinha, you're a moron!" "We shouldn't go to the farm at a time like this!" "You should have stayed to investigate the cup's theft!" "Dodozinha, but it's been so long since I saw my rose bushes... my chickens." "I miss them so." "It wasn't for watering roses or breeding chickens." "That the revolution occurred." "Miranda Imbiruçu, you're no general... you're the disgrace of the Brazilian Army!" "Oh, Dolores, I joined the Army for a quiet life... to whitewash trees, for the annual parade." "Now they've invented this dictatorship thing... hunting down Communists." "Communists are too wild, they're all young kids!" "Comrades, we've no time to lose!" "The world cup is ours!" "The dictatorship is in our hands!" "Long live the VRM!" "Vladimir's Revolutionary Movement!" "No, cut it out, man." "We already told you a thousand times we don't like that name." "Gee, I don't know why you keep insisting." "Forget it, ok?" "Yeah, man!" "Let's choose a name for our band, I mean... terrorist gang here, now and by mutual agreement, all right?" " Sure thing." " All right, then." "So let's have a meeting." "You're promoted from revolution driver... to revolution secretary!" "Go get a pen and paper!" "Right away, comrade." "Right, so since the militants won't name the organization... after its great leader, which genius has a better idea?" "I was thinking of something like..." "Department of..." "International..." "Communist..." "Komrades." "Groovy!" "D.I.C.K. I love this name!" "No, Wait!" "No one will want anything to do with Dick!" "I wouldn't mind." "You and your dirty mind!" "This revolution is serious, comrade!" "Write this down!" "Socialist Communist..." "Revolutionary Establishment of Workers!" "S.C.R.E.W. Great!" "Screw!" "No, wait, not that!" "I've another idea!" "Brazilian..." "League of Workers!" " Nice!" "B.L.O.W. Blow!" "Give me that!" "I'll do the writing!" "The..." "Revolutionary..." "Party..." "Wait a minute, you're always doing everything yourself." "It's everyone's name." "Put one of my causes, put anti-carnivorous." " All right." " And what is there of mine?" " Dunno." "Put Carlos, there you go!" "It reads:" "Carlos Revolutionary..." "Anti-carnivorous Party!" " Everyone in agreement?" " Yeah, the Carlos is great." "C.R.A.P. Crap." "Wow, that's great." "It suits you perfectly!" "Look." "What's Lucy Ellen's car doing here?" "I can smell something fishy." "Honey, that was me." "Sorry." "You know me and my gases." "The bumpy road on the way up." "Sorry about that." "Oh, my God!" "My mum and dad!" "Trouble!" "My God!" "Let's go, let's go!" "Hurry up with that key, Mirandinha!" "I must find out what my daughter is up to in there!" " The cup!" " Leave it to me!" "Wait, honey, I can't get it in." "Look, Mirandinha, you've always been useless... but now's your moment." "Come on, you moron!" " Lucy Ellen!" " Mother!" "What a lovely surprise!" "I was just talking about you to the holy fathers." "Fathers?" "!" "Lucy Ellen, you're with priests?" "You don't even go to church!" "Yes, but, Mother, it's never too late to find God's word." "I came here to meditate." "And these reverends... were just passing through this region spreading Jesus' message!" "What a marvelous coincidence, isn't it, my daughter?" "An amazing coincidence." "Almost a miracle." "So, Mother, if it's a miracle, that's got to do with religion!" "Mother, wasn't it you who always wanted me... to follow the path of faith?" "Sure, Dodozinha, stop giving the girl a hard time." " Your blessing, father." " God bless you, man." "So you're priests, are you?" "And if you're priests... you can answer one little question!" "Where was our Lord, the Savior, born?" " In Cuba." " Cuba?" "!" "Cuba?" "!" "I knew something strange was going on in here!" " Wait, I know." "Moscow." " Moscow?" "!" "Brothers, let's go." "We must take God's word... to other sheep in our flock, man." " Sure thing." "Amen, amen!" " Let's go!" " Mirandinha, the cup!" " Wait, it's mine!" "Mirandinha!" "You're surrounded!" "There's no pointing in trying to defend yourselves!" "Hand over the cup and commit suicide!" "Not necessarily in that order!" "They've destroyed my rose bushes... and killed my hens." "Have they no limits?" "!" "Where will this revolution end?" "Stop blubbering, Mirandinha!" "Stop being such a wimp." "You know you can't have a revolution without breaking a few eggs!" "It's no use, General Manso, it was my husband who found the cup..." "General Miranda Imbiruçu, of the Brazilian Army!" "Mirandinha is a blockhead!" "He can't even find his way home!" "But it's my Mirandinha who's going to get promoted." "He'll be the president!" "Mirandinha, president?" "Only of the Impotent Pensioners Reserve Club!" "Impotent, yes!" "But impotent president of Brazil!" "Retreat!" "I have to admit... that Dolores is one helluva woman!" "Welcome." "That's why I like working with you Communists, always punctual." "Look, this place is exactly what you asked for." "Hidden, total privacy." "It's been a hideout for several kidnappings." "It's one of the most sought-after hideouts in Rio de Janeiro." "It's falling apart." "Haven't you got a better hideout?" "We've got places for all types of leftwing movements." "For example, the festive left." "Look at that wonderful mansion... with a pool, a huge ballroom." "If you're Maoist, just look at this wonderful place." "Right next to a Chinese restaurant." "The thing is, we're rather short of cash." "Commies are always complaining about money!" "Where's Moscow's gold?" "Rob a bank, shit!" "Comrade, you don't understand." "We want something real cheap, almost free." "We haven't got anything for the poor, it's a hot market." "Hundreds of clandestine organizations are splitting every day." "The demand's enormous!" "This is the cheapest hideout I have!" " Man, who are those guys?" " Easy, that's the last tenant." "He's handing the place over today." "So, comrades, I'm returning this American ambassador." "I won't need the hideout anymore." "Here's the key." " What about the contract?" " Oh!" "I smoked the contract." "Sorry." "That guy's an ass!" "Didn't even leave a stub of contract for me to smoke." "Buddy, we'll take it." "Now excuse us, we've got a lot to do here." "Congratulations on the hideout." "Happy revolution to you!" "Now when you take power, don't forget daddy here, will you?" "Don't go sending me to no firing squad!" "NIS, National Information Service, can I help you?" "Yes, sir, we give any information." "Weather forecast?" "Nice weather." "Subject to storm strikes." "Bring us the subject, and we'll strike him." "Gentlemen, I have information... that the terrorists are right here." "Our troops will move along this flank... supported by tanks coming from the rear." "General, it would be better to attack with fighters and parachutes." "Sure!" "I'll come in next with my Phantom F-5's... equipped with 50-mm Schmautze machine guns." "No, no fighters!" "We must use my parachutists!" "Yes, I like the parachutists which go tcum topof." "We'll attack with the parachutists!" "Damn, isn't anyone interested in my fighter planes?" "Just look." "They have lights, bombs and make noise." "Yeah, you're right." "Let's attack with the fighters with lights!" "My first hideout." "I'm so excited." "Me too." "I'm getting goosebumps, you know." "Oh, how cute." "You're all excited?" "While you're getting goosebumps in here..." "I'm going in there because I've got something very important... to sort out with Wladimir." "Oh, Wladimir!" "Oh, baby!" "Oh, I wanna embrace your cause!" "I must join this revolutionary life!" "Look, I'll do anything!" "No, Lucy, you must understand." "The life of a revolutionary is very hard." "Oh, hard?" "But that's just what I like." "Calm down, Lucy, think of our struggle." "Fidel and Che spent 5 years in Sierra Maestra with no sex." "Fidel and Che?" "I never even knew they had an affair!" "Oh, my revolutionary!" "Frederico Eugênio!" "Mother?" "You here?" "Son, you left the door of the hideout open!" "If the dictatorship come in here and find you without your shirt... you'll catch a cold!" "Put on your cardigan, Son." "Mummy's darling little boy!" "Behave and tomorrow I'll bring you some cake, ok?" "Ok, Mom." "You're gonna have to choose." "Either stay with me... or with mummy, her cardigan, her cake." "Wait, Lucy, that's going too far." "Have you ever tasted my mum's cakes?" "You really are a jerk!" "I'm going off to screw the first person I come across!" "Hi!" "That is, the second person I come across!" "Hi, fine?" "The third person for sure." "Come on, Chimbica, let's walk." "Come on, Chimbica." "Let's walk." "Walk with daddy." "Walk, walk." "Fetch, fetch!" "Go on, Chimbica, fetch." "That's it, sweetie." "Sweetie." "Dad, I've joined the proletarian revolution." "Await further news." "My daughter with the Communists!" "Damn!" "How am I going to tell Dolores?" "We're not bluffing!" "This is the earof the Jules Rimet cup!" "If you don't collaborate, there'll be nothing left of it!" "But how can I be sure this ear is the real one?" "Easy." "Be today at Maracanã Stadium at five." " Come alone." " Sure, sure." "If you don't, we'll melt your daughter... and make the cup pregnant!" "Hell, you understand, right?" "MARIO FILHO STADIUM" "Gee, what's that, man?" "How crazy." "Folks, didn't you say 5 o'clock?" "It's a minute past 5." "My dad's not coming." " You can all start getting me pregnant." " Oh, my God!" "Lucy Ellen, darling... you really are with the Communists!" " Are you at least wearing panties?" " Yes, Daddy." "What a relief." "She's wearing panties." " No, Dad." "I'm with the Communists!" " Enough of this bourgeois small talk!" "We have the Jules Rimet." "We shall only return this symbol of dictatorship... if you comply with our demands!" "You Communists are so stressed out." "First I must be sure... you really have the trophy." "How can I be sure... this ear you sent was really from the Jules Rimet?" "It can be from any trophy." "The Guanabara Cup..." "Here's the proof." "Look here the Jules Rimet trophy!" "Attention, Communists!" "You're surrounded!" "You with the cup... hand it over and commit suicide!" "Not necessarily in that order!" "Platoon, come back immediately!" "That's a statue, you idiots!" "The terrorists have gone the other way!" "Mirandinha, you muddler!" "Don't just stand there, you fool!" " Go and get reinforcements!" " Reinforcements?" "I know!" "I'll call Dolores!" "Welcome to the Indian Museum." "Me Indian Jonathan." "I'll be your guide." "Look, man." "I mean, Indian." "We haven't got any liquor, all right?" "Indian Jonathan wants no firewater." "Indian Jonathan wants to be your guide." "No shorts, no photography... and the bag must stay outside." "No, Mr. Indian, we haven't time to visit the museum now." "Ouch!" "Look!" "They can't be far." "I can smell Communist." "They went... that way." "Thanks for the information, my good savage." "Sergeant, give him some liquor." "When I get my hands on those bastards, I'll destroy them!" "General, we've searched the whole museum." "We found no one, sir!" "The museum is deserted, sir!" "It's a disgrace, but in our country no one visits museums." " No one values our culture." " Damn!" "They got away again!" "Platoon, about-turn, march!" "Oh, shit!" "Folks, let's get the cup and thank comrade Indian savage." " Where's the Indian?" " Where's the cup?" "Oh, look, the cup!" "Wow, the Indians won the World Cup too, man." "What are you talking about, comrade?" "Can't you see?" "The Indians worship a god just like the Jules Rimet trophy." "The Indian robbed us." "We'll never see the cup again." " Damn." " Wait a minute." ""Papa-Pussy village." "Located on the left bank of the Amazon river." "Take the second stream after the lights. "" "Comrades, we'll go after this Indian." "DRY AXE!" "AVOID PERSPIRING AND ATTRACT WOMEN" "DESTROYING RAINFOREST?" "USE TABAJARA CHAINSAWS" " Don't move, man!" " Comrade stewardess... this plane is being "expopriated" in the name of the revolution!" "Comrade pilot, we're the CRAP revolutionaries." "We demand that this plane fly immediately to the Amazon!" "But this plane is already going to the Amazon." " Really?" " Yes." "Fine then." "That's great." "Then we demand two sodas for each CRAP member... or we'll blow up the plane." "A very strange thing has just happened... here near Maracanã Stadium in Rio de Janeiro." "A statue was found dead... with over 40 machine gun shots." "We're going to try to speak to General Manso... in charge of the operation, to find out what happened." "Unfortunately, the statue committed suicide... after a profound nervous crisis." "But, general, suicide with a machine gun?" "What's the problem?" "People can kill themselves as they wish!" "This is a democracy!" "Sure, only I've never seen a suicide with 40 shots." "No?" "That's the trouble with the press, so badly informed." "Soldier, show this reporter how to commit suicide with 40 machine gun shots." "Go!" " Stop!" "Wait!" "Attention!" "In a daring operation, a dangerous subversive group... has just abducted a plane bound forthe Amazon." "The plane's route was diverted to the..." "Amazon." "The terrorists have been identified as CRAPmembers..." "Carlos Revolutionary Anti-carnivorous Party." " Carlos?" "Why Carlos?" " Oh, my St. Salustiano!" "It's my Frederico Eugênio!" "He went to the Amazon, with all that jungle and humidity!" "And forgot his cardigan!" "Mirandinha, jump down, arrest those subversives... get the cup, so that you'll be president and I'll be first lady." " But, Dolores, are you sure?" "Me, alone in the middle of the Amazon, it's very dangerous." "The forest is full of ferocious animals." "Lions, tigers, rhinoceros." "Those are not nationalist animals!" "There are just piranhas, alligators and poisonous snakes!" "Green light!" "Jump!" "Go, stop balking!" "So?" "Did you get rid of the cuckold?" "Sure, my hot general." "Now we have all the time in the world just to make love." "Make love?" "!" "I'm bad, I'm real bad." "I'm as bad as they come." "A guy like me doesn't make love!" "I do just dirty stuff!" "Mansão, I bet you say that to all the girls." "We'll never find the Indians in all this jungle!" "Gee, we should get rid of all this jungle." "What if we smoked the forest?" "Denílson, I've gotta tell you something, man." "You've gotta kick this addiction." " What addiction, smoking?" " No, taking it in the ass." "Gotcha!" "My God!" "I'm sorry!" " Did I hurt you?" " No problem." "I probably only broke a couple of ribs or my collar-bone." "But it's good." "At least it makes a change from the usual routine." "What a pretty cardigan." "Can you teach me that stitch?" "Sure." "It's like this." "That's great." "Where did you learn how to knit?" "In the Army." "They teach you loads of things, you know." " Miranda Imbiruçu, at your service." " Julieta, pleasure." "I'm knitting this cardigan for my son." "Look at him." "Isn't he cute?" "But imagine, he's in the middle of this jungle, this forest... this humidity, and he's always going out without his cardigan." "Just like my daughter." "Lucy Ellen is always going out without her panties." "Kids are all the same, so much trouble." "But listen to me, Mr. Miranda, in the Army... apart from knitting, what else do you do?" "I'm a general." "I'm in the field... of repression and combat of subversive terrorists." "But I'm dying to retire." "Gardening's more my thing planting my rose bushes." " Oh, roses!" "I love roses!" " Mr. Miranda." " You can call me Mirandinha." "Oh, I think we've already been here before." "Easy, comrade." "Let's check the map." "Here!" "When I find those Communists, I'll tear out every hair... then pull their balls and twist them until they bleed!" "Manso, you're so romantic!" "WELCOME TO PAPA-PUSSY VILLAGE" "Welcome to Papa-Pussy village." "No photography, no shorts... and you'll have to leave that outside." "Name?" "Wladimir." "Lucy Ellen Imbiruçu." "Peixoto Carlos, ok?" "Listen here, Mr. Indian, why all this bureaucracy?" "You're not a cop, what do you need records for?" "Indian Jonathan isn't filling in records." "Indian Jonathan is writing menu." "You needn't grill me!" "Nothing will make me name my comrades!" "Are you crazy, Peixoto?" "We're your comrades... everyone's here, man!" " Hands up." "Hands up." " Raise your hands... put down your weapons and let the cute one go." "Wow, what a beard." "What a hat." "Hey, man, don't I know you from someplace?" "Cat Stevens!" "Man, I've been wanting to meet you for ages!" "Hey, didn't you steal a song of mine, huh?" "Wait, comrade." "This isn't Cat Stevens." "This is the great Commander Che Guevara!" "But, commander, I thought you had died." " It was in all the papers." " No, I didn't die." "That was all planned." "A great marketing ploy to increase sales... of my T-shirts and posters with my face." "But, commander, what about the guerilla war?" "That today is just a hobby... something for the weekends." "The T-shirt market is much more lucrative." "But one day we'll take up the guerrilla war again, ok?" "Commander, I'm your greatest fan." "I have a tattoo of you." "Look!" "Yes, the beard's the same... but Fidel is the one who smokes cigars." "Wait, commander, you're looking at the wrong place." " The tattoo is on the thigh." " Oh, I see." "Mirandinha, do you know where we're going?" "Listen, in the Army, did you ever take... a jungle survival course?" "Julieta, I've done 62 trainings for jungle survival." "Wow, I had no idea you guys trained so much." "No, only I failed 62 times." "Are we in Vietnam?" "Well, honey." "I think I'll have to recalculate." "We went a little bit further." "We'll have to go back." "Without me, the revolution would be nothing." "We were in Sierra Maestra..." "Fidel, Camilo Cienfuegos "y yo"." "Joe?" "!" "What the hell was Joe Cocker doing in Cuba, man?" "Don't be stupid, comrade." ""Yo" means "me" in Spanish!" "You were in Sierra Maestra too, man?" "Wow, commander, you say such amazing things." "But tell me something, baby... are all guerrilla fighters as charming as you?" "Lucy, guerrilla fighters aren't charming." "They're ugly, dirty, bearded, stinking, sweaty." "Stop, Wladimir!" "You're only saying that to make me horny, right?" "I think we'd better go to sleep and leave the commander to rest." "Good idea, good idea." "Let's all get some sleep." "Men on one side, women..." "in different tents, ok?" "To avoid any trouble which might damage the revolution, ok?" "Let's get some sleep." "Didn't I tell you, Lucy?" "Sex between fighting comrades... only wastes the energy which should be used... in the fight against the oppressive forces of the oppression." "Holy cow!" "This rifle's excellent." "Must be from Jamaica." "It's now that the cock will crow." "Chick, chick." "See how fine." "Wow!" "Oh, Che!" "How big!" "You ain't seen nothing yet, we must grow hard!" "But... without ever losing one's tenderness, right?" "Chick, now I'll show you... how we do it down in Cuba." "Oh, Che!" "Not down there!" "It hurts too much!" "Oh, Che!" "Delicious." "I forbid this sexual copulation!" "You are violating Commander Che Guevara's revolutionary rules!" " Calm down!" "Calm down, comrade cuckold, you don't understand!" "Che!" "It's you?" "What's this, comrade?" "You fooled me!" "You betrayed the revolutionary ideals!" "You Communists are really boring, so stressed out!" "You can't even have a quick screw in peace!" "Look, if it weren't for the T-shirt business..." "I'd have got out of this a long time ago!" " Bastard!" " Easy, comrade cuckold!" "Easy, comrade cuckold!" "Easy, comrade cuckold!" "Bastard." "Calm down!" "Oh, my God!" "A shot!" "Do you think something's happened to my Frederico Eugênio?" "If it's Lucy, Dolores will kill me!" "Frederico Eugênio, what's happened?" "Are you all right, Son?" "Don't worry, I brought your cardigan, look!" "Damn, I've killed Che Guevara!" " What's going on?" " This member of the dictatorship... allied to the American Yankee imperialism... has just assassinated the great leader Che Guevara!" "Me?" "Julieta, your son's crazy!" "I only just got here!" "Che is dead." "And now, what shall we do?" "I don't know about you." "I'm going to the beach." "I'm going to Búzios to grab a few hot bitches." "You've no revolutionary conscience!" "I shall fight on!" "Now, with the commander's second death... the T-shirt business will expand wildly!" " True." "I'm off to the beach." " Money comes first." "Everyone!" "Everyone, the cup's here!" "Lucy Ellen, my dear, you're up there... with no panties!" "I think our movement has started to crack up." "And what a crack!" "Attention, subversive terrorists and primitive savages!" "Hand over the Jules Rimet trophy and commit suicide!" "Not necessarily in that order!" "Holy cow, man!" "We're gonna die!" "We've had it!" "And not necessarily in that order." "It's no use, the troops will never lay their hands on this cup!" " Are you sure, man?" " Sure, look." "They're sinking in quicksand generated by computer graphics!" " But that's terrible!" " You're telling me!" "It could be so much more realistic!" "If it was an American movie, it would be far better!" "Manso, we're going to die!" "I know how to survive in desperate situations." "I'll grab that creeper." "Jump on my back and hold tight!" " That's no creeper!" " Yuck!" "We're dying just because you weren't man enough... to hold the Indian's creeper!" "I'm a general of the Brazilian Armed Forces!" "I'd never hold the member of a primitive being and inferior race!" "Inferior?" "That big?" "Manso, you've gotta be kidding!" "THE END" "What, that's it?" "That's the ending?" "I thought this film was a comedy." "Sure is." "Give me a break!" "Folks, the film needn't end like that." "Make up a new ending!" "Champagne." "Champagne." "Wow, what a great happy ending!" "We're in first class!" "Would you like a shrimp?" "Wow, look at the size of that shrimp." "Is it from Jamaica?" "Lucy Ellen, my dear, now that it's all over... promise me one thing." "You'll never go out without your panties again!" "Don't worry, general, I'll take care of her." "Lucy, do as your father says." "Go in there and put these on." "Wow, Wladimir, you're so romantic." "You know, that was the first time... a man ever asked me to put my panties on." "Wait, we can't marry now." "You're only 13." "I'm Woody Allen." "We'll have to wait a bit." "Your attention, please." "We've just lost all our engines." "We'll try to make an emergency landing." "Our chances of survival are minimal." "Please, place your ID in your pocket... to help with the identification of the bodies." "Oh, my Oscar!" "Where's my Oscar?" "Thank you for flying with this airline." "If you have any question, our ground staff... will be happy to direct you to the nearest cemetery." "Just kidding!" "Where's my Oscar?" "Gee." "That shrimp from Jamaica really made me high." "I'm hallucinating that the plane crashed in the jungle!" "Yeah!" "Far out, man!" "Oh!" "Wladimir, thank God you're alive." "Oh, darling, are you all right?" "No way, all his clothes are torn!" "Wladimir, you'll catch your death of cold." "Put on your cardigan, Son." "And the cup?" "Where's the cup?" "We've lost the cup!" "Easy, general." "Everything's groovy." "Amid all the confusion..." "I managed to grab the cup and put it in this bag." "Wow, great." "The film hasn't even finished, and we've already won an Oscar!" "People, don't go, it's time for the debate." "The film is about the 70's." "Back then... films were always followed by debates." "So, has anyone a question?" "You can ask anything you like." "A person there has a question." "I have a question." "Where are the toilets?" "Serious." "Does anyone have a question about the film?" "About the film?" "I have one." "If I wanna watch the next session, is it free?" "Folks, this is serious." "We took ages making this film." "A question anyone?" "I have one." "There's a mistake in this film." "You know when the terrorists are escaping... and meet that drunk guy?" "A very modern car passes... a car that wasn't around at that time." "You're right." "In those days they didn't have... such modern and sophisticated cars as the Polo Sedan." "But Volkswagen merchandising did exist." "Buddy, I'm a film critic... and, like..." "I thought the explosions in this film were really phony." " How about that one, better?" " Great." "Another question." "I haven't a question, but I'm a fan of yours." "Could I take a picture with you?" " Sure, come on up." " For real?" " Hey, what's up?" " Hi." "Ouch!" "Hey, someone pinched my ass!" "What's the problem?" "You're a fan." "Sure, but that doesn't mean you can pinch my ass." "Pretty lousy fan if you won't even let us pinch your ass." "Really!" "Ripped by Feedback Overflow."