"Satisfied?" "I'm not sure that's the word." "OK." " I didn't mean satisfied like..." " No, I wasn't trying to..." "Cos we're not having satisfaction in the personal sense." "Of course." " I should go." "Giles is..." " Is waiting for you." "Yeah, I know." "Thanks." "For the work-out." "Am I going to see you this weekend?" "You... you... you probably have plans." "Right." "Birthday." "Actually, I do have a thing." "A thing." "Date?" "Nice attempt at casual." "Actually, I do have a date." "Older man." "Very handsome." "Likes it when I call him "Daddy"." "Your father." "It is your father, right?" "He's taking me to the ice show." "It should be big fun." "I could use a little fun." "This one?" " Amethyst." " Used for?" "Breath mints?" "Charm bags, money spells, and for cleansing one's aura." "OK." "How do you know if one's aura is dirty?" "Does somebody come by and write "wash me" on it?" "Buffy, I'm aware of your distaste at studying vibratory stones, but since it is part of your training, I would appreciate your glib-free attention." "Sorry." "It's just, with Faith on one of her unannounced walkabouts, somebody should be patrolling." "Faith is not interested in proper training." "So I must rely on you." " I hate being the good one." " As for patrolling, you'll be there soon." "Why so anxious?" "I guess that I just have some energy to burn." "Well, in due time." "But, for the present, if it's not entirely beyond your capabilities, try to concentrate." " That looked funny." "Do it again." " I'll kill you for that." "For that?" "What were you trying to kill me for before?" "OK, so here's the deal..." "Let me know if I'm not doing this right." "A bit early in the day." "Giles, something's wrong." "Wrong?" "Perhaps you shouldn't do that any more." "On top of that, I got a bad case of the dizzies and almost let a vamp stake me." "With my own stake." "I'm way off my game." "My game's left the county." "It's in Cuernavaca." "Giles, what's going on here?" "Perhaps you've got a bad flu bug or something." "No." "No, not sick." "I can't get sick." "My dad's coming to take me to the ice show." "We do it every year for my birthday." "If I cancel, it's gonna break his heart." "Well, just take it easy for 48 hours." "Forgo patrolling until you feel yourself again." "No." "No, I just need to spend a little more time training." " I'm gone." " Thank you." "An ice show?" "A show performed on ice." " How old are we again?" " I went to Snoopy on Ice when I was little." "My dad took me backstage and I got so scared I threw up on Woodstock." "I know you think it's a big, dumb, girly thing, but it's not." "A lot of the skaters are Olympic medal winners." "Dad buys me cotton candy and one of those souvenir programmes and..." "OK, it's a big, dumb, girly thing, but I love it." "It's not so girly." "Ice is cool." "It's water, but it's not." "It's sweet you and your dad have a tradition." "Especially now that he's not around so much." "Ixnay on the caramel corn though if you go backstage." "But we're still talking party?" "Some of us still love to relish celebrating the birth of the Buff." "I don't know." "It might be time to put a moratorium on parties in my honour." "They tend to go badly." "Monsters crash, people die..." "But 18's a big one, Buffy." "I mean, you can vote now." "You can be drafted." "You can vote not to be drafted." "I think I'll celebrate this one with quiet reflection." "Where's it written that quiet reflection can't be combined with cake and funny hats?" "Buffy?" "Present." "Present." "They're not." "They're from your father." "His quarterly projections are unravelling and he can't afford to take off." "He promises to make it up to you." "It's all right there in the letter." "If you want, I could ask somebody to cover for me at the gallery." "I mean, if you want me to take you." "No." "No, that's not necessary." "I was just thinking it might be nice to have a quiet birthday." " How much longer, Hobson?" " Five, maybe six hours, sir." "Once you've finished, you and Blair can get some rest." "But sleep in shifts." "We're getting very close." "The Slayer's preparation is nearly complete." "You know, it's not just cartoon characters." "They do pieces from operas and ballets." "Brian Boitano doing Carmen is a life changer." "He doesn't actually play Carmen." "But a lot of sophisticated people go." "Yes, I think we should start with the grounding crystal again." "It's usually something that families do together." "Look very carefully for the tiny flaw at its core." "If someone were free, they'd take their daughters, or their student, or their slayer." "Yes, but, Buffy, I think we should concentrate now." "Now, look for the flaw at its centre." "Buffy?" "I'm sorry." "Did I zone out on you?" "I'm just..." "I'm nursing that flu bug." "Best take care of that." " Perhaps we should..." " Call it a night." "Yeah, that's a good idea." "Thanks." "Good night." "How's it going with Amy the rat?" "Good." "She loves her exercise wheel." "She runs around, her nose wiggles..." "I meant, how's it going changing her back into a human being?" "Still working on it." "But I just got her the cutest little bell..." "You don't do that to me." "I waited for you at the Bronze all night." "And the big deal is...?" "You made me look like some kind of dork in front of my posse." "First of all, "posse"?" "Passé." "Second, anyone with a teaspoon of brains knows not to take my flirting seriously." "Especially with my extenuating circumstances." " What circumstances?" " Rebound." "Look it up." " Hey, I'm not through here." " I beg to differ." " What is wrong with you?" " The chick started it." "Are you OK?" "OK, I just got swatted down by some no neck and rescued by Cordelia." " What is happening?" " It will sort itself out." "Look, you're not getting the big picture here." "I have no strength." "I have no coordination." " I throw knives like..." " A girl?" "Like I'm not the Slayer." "Look, Buffy, I..." "I assure you, given time, we'll get to the bottom of whatever's causing this anomaly." " Promise me?" " Yes." "I give you my word." "You're having doubts," "Cruciamentum is not easy." "For Slayer or Watcher." "But it's been done this way for a dozen centuries." "Whenever a slayer turns 18." "It's a time-honoured rite of passage." "It's an archaic exercise in cruelty." "To lock her in this tomb, weakened, defenceless, and to unleash that on her." "If any one of the Council still had contact with a slayer they would see, but I'm the one in the thick of it." "You can't make this decision - you're too close." " That's not true." " A slayer is not just physical prowess." "She must have cunning, imagination." "A confidence derived from self-reliance." "And believe me, once this is all over, your Buffy will be stronger for it." "Or she'll be dead for it." "Rupert, if this girl is everything you say, then you've nothing to worry about." "Sir, if you can spare me for a short spell, I'll need to make a run to the hardware store." "Take care of it." "Come along, come along." "Kralik." "Your pills." "Open your mouth." "That's enough." "Close it up." ""A curse on slayers."" "Oh, no, wait." "It's "lawyers"." "Maybe we're on the wrong track with the whole spell, curse and whammy thing." "Maybe what we should be looking for is something like slayer kryptonite." "Faulty metaphor." "Kryptonite kills." "You assume I meant green kryptonite." "I was referring to red kryptonite, which drains Superman of his powers." "Wrong, gold kryptonite's the power-sucker." "The red kryptonite mutates Superman into..." "Guys?" "Reality?" "Buffy, I know you are definitely, without a doubt, gonna get your powers back." "Thanks, Will." "But what if you don't?" "OK." "If I don't get my powers back, then I don't." "I'll deal." " And there's a whole lot of good sides to it." " Actually, this could open up so many..." " Did you find anything?" " No." "Not yet." "It's your shift." " Pills." " Yes." "It's coming." "Pills." " Take them." " Pills." " They're right in front of you." " Where?" " Here." " I can't see... can't... can't reach it." "Open your eyes." "Everything's OK now." "Thank you." "It's beautiful." " You really like it?" " Of course I do." "It's sweet and thoughtful and full of neat words to learn and say, like "wilt" and "henceforth"." "Then why did you seem more excited last year when you got a severed arm in a box?" "I'm sorry." "It's just suddenly there's this chance that my calling's a wrong number, and" " it's freaking me out a little." " That's understandable." "Angel, what if I have lost my power?" "You've lived a long time without it." "You can do it again." "I guess." "But what if I can't?" "I've seen too much." "I know what goes bump in the night." "Not being able to fight it..." "What if I just hide under my bed, all scared and helpless?" "Or what if I become pathetic, hanging out at the old slayers' home, talking about my glory days, showing them the stake I had bronzed?" "Buffy, you could never be helpless or boring, not even if you tried." "Don't be so sure." "Before I was the Slayer, I was..." "well, I don't want to say shallow, but let's say a certain person, who will remain nameless - we'll call her Spordelia - looked like a classical philosopher next to me." "Angel, if I'm not the Slayer, what do I do?" "What do I have to offer?" "Why would you like me?" "I saw you before you became the Slayer." " What?" " I watched you, and I saw you called." "It was a bright afternoon, out in front of your school." "You walked down the steps, and... and I loved you." "Why?" "Because I could see your heart." "You held it before you for everyone to see, and I worried that it would be bruised or torn." "And more than anything in my life I wanted to keep it safe, to warm it with my own." "That's beautiful." "Or, taken literally, incredibly gross." "I was just thinking that too." "You're up." "I was afraid I'd drained you too much." "I do that sometimes." "Ever have a tune you can't get out of your head, that keeps playing over and over?" "It drives me nuts." "Thank you." "That is much better." "It's a game, you know." "We're not going to play by their rules, but that doesn't mean we're not gonna play." "Why don't you call your friend in here?" "We'll discuss it over dinner." "Quentin?" "Hello?" "Quentin?" "Hob...?" " She's cute." " Yeah." "Let's find out." "Hey, sweet girl." "How much for a lap dance for me and my buddy?" ""Walk me home, Angel?" "No, I'm fine." "I can take care of myself."" "Hummers." "Big turn-off." "I like guys that can remember the lyrics." "You know, I wish I could, but my mind just isn't what it used to be." " Let me go." " You didn't say "please"." "Help me, somebody." "Please." "Help me, please." "Help me, please." "Somebody, please help me." "No." "Stop." "Please." "I need help." "Please stop." "Hurry." "When I hit him, it felt like my arm was broken, it hurt so much." "I can't be just a person." "I can't be helpless like that." "Giles, please." "We have to figure out what's happening to me." "It's an organic compound of muscle relaxants and adrenal suppressors." "The effect is temporary." "You'll be yourself again in a few days." "You?" "It's a test, Buffy." "It's given to the Slayer once she..." "if she reaches her 18th birthday." "The Slayer is disabled, and then entrapped with a vampire whom she must defeat in order to pass the test." "The vampire you were to face has escaped." "His name is Zackary Kralik." "As a mortal, he murdered and tortured more than a dozen women before he was committed to an asylum for the criminally insane." "When a vamp..." "You bastard." "All this time you saw what it was doing to me." "All this time and you didn't say a word." " I wanted to." " Liar." "In matters of tradition and protocol, I must answer to the Council." "My role in this was very specific." "I was to administer the injections and to direct you to the old boarding house" " on Prescott Lane." " I can't..." "I can't hear this." "Buffy, please." "Who are you?" "How could you do this to me?" "I am deeply sorry, and you have to understand..." "If you touch me, I'll kill you." "You have to listen to me." "Because I've told you this, the test is invalidated." "You will be safe now, I promise." "Whatever I have to do to deal with Kralik" " and to win back your trust..." " You stuck a needle in me." "You poisoned me." "What's going on?" "Oh, God." "Is the world ending?" "I have to research a paper on Bosnia, but if the world's ending, I'm not gonna bother." "You can't walk home alone, Buffy." "It isn't safe." "I don't know you." "Did something take her memory?" "He's Giles." "Gi-les." "He hangs out here a lot." "Cordelia, could you please drive me home?" "Of course." "But if the world doesn't end, I'm gonna need a note." "Buffy?" "Mother." "Mother." "May I call you Mother?" "My own mother was a person with no self-respect of her own, so she tried to take mine." "Ten years old, she had the scissors - you wouldn't believe what she did with those." "But she's dead to me now." "Mostly because I killed and ate her, but also because I know I won't be alone much longer." "I'll have your daughter." "I won't kill her, I'll just make her like me." "Different." "She'll go to sleep, and when she wakes up, your face will be the first thing she eats." "I have a problem with mothers." "I'm aware of that." "I was just trying to reach you." " I was on watch, by the boarding house." " Then you'll know what's happened." "Yes." "He's killed Hobson and made Blair one of his own." "Your perfectly controlled test seems to have spun rather impressively out of control, don't you think?" " It changes nothing." " Well, then allow me." "I've told Buffy everything." "That is in opposition to the Council's orders." "Yes." "Interestingly, I don't give a rat's arse about the Council's orders." "There will be no test." "The test has already begun." "Your slayer entered the field of play ten minutes ago." " Why?" " I don't know." "I returned there as she entered." " Giles, we've no business interfering." " This is not business." "Hide and seek." "Hide and seek." "Why did you come to the dark of the woods?" "To bring all these sweets to Grandmother's house?" "Oh, no, no." "Just a little lower." "Right..." "Oh, yes." "Yes..." "Thank you very much." "If you stray from the path, you will lose your way." "I won't take it all." "I won't take it all..." "No." "No." "No." "Buffy?" "Buffy, we have to get out." "Where are they?" "Where are they?" "You... you don't seem to understand your place in all of this." "Do you have any idea...?" "Oh, my." "What have you...?" "My pills?" "No." "No." "If I was at full Slayer power, I'd be punning right about now." "No." "No." "Buffy, thank God you're OK." "Oh, that man..." " I can't get these." "They're too tight." " Can't you just...?" "Not right now." "Maybe there's some clippers around." "Congratulations, You passed," "You exhibited extraordinary courage and clear-headedness in battle." "The Council is very pleased." "Do I get a gold star?" " I understand that you're upset..." " You understand nothing." "You set that monster loose and he came after my mother." "You think the test was unfair?" "I think you better leave town before I get my strength back." "We're not in the business of "fair"." "We're fighting a war." "You're waging a war." "She's fighting it." "Mr Giles, if you don't mind..." " The test is done." "We're finished." " Not quite." "She passed." "You didn't." "The Slayer is not the only one who must perform in this situation." "I have recommended to the Council that you be relieved of your duties as watcher immediately." "You're fired." "On what grounds?" "Your affection for your charge has rendered you incapable of clear judgement." "You have a father's love for the child, and that is useless to the cause." "It would be best if you had no further contact with the Slayer." " I'm not going anywhere." " I didn't expect you would adhere to that." "However, if you interfere with the new watcher in any way, you will be dealt with." " Are we clear?" " We're very clear." "Congratulations again." "Bite me." "Yes, well..." "Colourful girl." "I can't believe Giles was fired." "How could Giles get fired?" "So, how did you manage to kill Kralik?" "She was very clever." " You go ahead and tell it." "You tell it better." " When you say fired, do you mean fired?" "You're not cruising past that concept anytime soon, are ya?" "Well, it's just..." "I mean, he's been fired." "He's... he's unemployed." "He's between jobs." "Giles isn't going anywhere, Will." "He's still librarian." " OK, but I'm writing an angry letter." " Nothing's really gonna change." "The important thing is that I kept up my birthday tradition of misery and horror." "Bright side to everything?" "I'll just feel better when I get my strength back." "Give you a hand with that, little lady?" "You're loving this far too much." "Admit it." "Sometimes you just need a big, strong man." "Will?" "Give me a hand with that?"