"In the time of the Romans, men battled in arenas to prove strength and valor." "Winning meant life defeat, death." "Now they battle in gymnasiums for letters on their jackets and cheerleaders." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "The Body cannot be beaten." "The Body cannot be beat!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "We could cure cancer or win the Nobel Prize and no one would celebrate us like that." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Mwah." "Ha-ha-ha." "I love you, Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "They never carried Salinger down the hallway." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "No." "I can't have a roll?" " A roll." " You'll spoil Ryan's victory dinner." "Ryan has a victory dinner every other night." " Because he's a winner." " Winners are different." "They're not like you." "And me." "Uh-huh." "So, what are we having?" "Ryan's favorite." "Venison marinara." "Ha, ha." "I swear that boy will eat anything marinara." "He really will." "Ha-ha-ha." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" " Did you guys wait for me to eat?" " Yeah." "Aw, sorry, the guys carried me out for burgers so I had burgers." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "That's the nice thing about deer meat." "It reheats beautifully." "You said you were gonna help." "I wanted to." "But that looks heavy and smells gross." " And I'm a girl." " You're gonna play the girl card?" "Shame on you, Tessa." " I feel no shame." "Carry your own dirt." " Hey, careful, careful." "Of my flower." "You almost trampled my flower." " Your flower?" " Yeah." "The first thing to blossom in my garden." "I'm nurturing it." "You tender, tender soul." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" " Dominate at school, champ." " I will, Mom." "You have an amazing body." "Thanks, Dad." "Oh, boy." " Bye-bye." " You could be livelier with my send-offs." "Huh." "Lazy!" "Lazy!" "Lazy!" "That's what I'm talking about." "I don't know." "They're already pretty white." "Not white enough." "I need to freshen up my curb appeal." "I'm back on the market." "Okay." "Uh, so, what, you're thinking, um Picket Fence White?" "Crazy for Cotton balls?" "How about that one?" "Supremacy White." "I wouldn't recommend that." "Very few people can pull off Supremacy White." "Let's just say I wanna be the whitest white you can legally make me." "I can't help but feel like you're rushing into this." "You're making crazy decisions and you're not thinking about the consequences." "Oh, really?" "And what crazy decisions might you be referring to?" "My decision to divorce Steven?" " Absolutely not." " Okay." "That's none of my business." "I'm just saying that your gums have been through a lot." "And they're sensitive." "They're exposed." "They're single for the first time in years." "They're acting desperate." "Thank you for fitting me in today." "But I am gonna take my single, desperate gums elsewhere." " Kill it." " Whoa." " Hello, Sheila." "Didn't hear you coming." " It's my new gardening clogs." "Super stealthy." "But they do smell bad after the rain." "Good to know." "Dig it out by its roots." "It's weak." "Sets a bad precedent for the others." "Hey, hey." "Why don't we each tend to our own gardens, okay?" "Have you seen my roses across the street, George?" "They're winners." "Each one perfect." "And why?" "Because I deadhead the losers." "I don't do it because it's fun, although it is." "I do it so I can make the whole garden shine." "I have a different approach." "I think anything can flower with a little encouragement." "Ha-ha-ha." "Sometimes I wonder about you, George." "I really do wonder." "Likewise." "Having grown up in the city, I was at a distinct disadvantage." "We didn't play outside." "The park was where you went to buy weed." "And the all tall buildings blocked out all the sunlight." "In sixth grade, two girls in my class had rickets." "Tessa Altman, report to Mr. Wolfe's office." "Me?" "Oh, okay." "Tessa, you're failing." "What?" "That's not possible, I'm smart." "What class?" " Gym class." " That's not a class." "Of course it is a class." "If it weren't a class, you wouldn't be failing." "Which, I assure you, you are." "So this isn't about AP English?" "Tessa, this F will bring down your GPA." "So you might wanna get real about your future." "Shall we chat trade schools?" "The fact that Phys Ed can drop a deuce on my academic record is preposterous." "All this school cares about is sports." "They are obsessed." "Why?" "Sports don't matter at all in the real world." "Actually, it's a multibillion-dollar industry." "Students." "Students." "By now, many of you have no doubt heard about the scandal." "He's sleeping with Chef Alan." "That is not the scandal to which I was referring." "But yes, I am." "And I love him." "A lot." "Ariel, our student body president, has stepped down this morning due to unexpected fatness." "We'll be holding a special election for a new class president." " Is Dalia running?" " Makes sense." "The only criteria for being on the student body seems to be having a good body." "Hey, you guys." "As you all know, Kenzie and Kaitlin are mad fit." "Their bodies are tight, and so is their platform." "Hey, you guys." "I'm Kenzie." "She's Kaitlin." "Hey." "You guys, there's a lot of fat kids, and sports is what makes them unfat." "There are a lot of smart kids..." " ...that would argue that unfat isn't a word." " Ha, ha." "That's why we propose doubling the current gym requirement." "To double what it is now." "What?" "They're cutting academics so we can chase a ball around?" "Thin Twins for the win." "Ha, ha." "Vote for them, you guys." "I mean it." "Okay." "Thank you, ladies." "Now, if anyone wants to oppose the Thin Twin ticket, see me and..." "I oppose." "I oppose everything they stand for." "What are you saying, Tessa?" "You wanna run for student-body president?" "That's exactly what I'm saying." "Wait." "She cannot run for student-body president." "She wears layers." "You can't even see her body." "My body might not have been The Body, but it was up for a fight." "And sometimes, as Ryan Shay was learning the scrappy ones will surprise you." "Oh, Sheila." "I can't tell you how shocked Jill and I were to hear the news." "Jill likes to feel in private, so she's home." "Me?" "I'll feel anywhere." "Can I see The Body?" "We're not doing that." "We want people to remember Ryan like he was." "Perfect." "Hi." "Excuse me." "So you went ahead and did it." "Back-alley bleaching." "Is that what I'm looking at?" " You bit the trays, hit the strips." " You betcha." "And I'm glad I did." "You may not agree with my decision, but it's my decision, not yours." "Oh, why don't you come out and say it?" "You're on his side." "We were all at brunch a month ago." "The four of us shared two desserts." "I like doing that." "You get to taste a little of each one." "Well, Steven was tasting a lot more than dessert." "I love you dearly, Noah, but this isn't about you." "Steven and I are over." "So update my file and move on." "What did she bring?" "Trouble." "And ambrosia." "Hey." "What's going on?" "I actually just stopped by to borrow your rake." " What happened?" " It's Ryan." "Our favorite rake." "I'm using the British Regency-era definition." " It's not the time to showboat." " I thought Ryan just tore his ACL." "You know what?" "This is your big chance." "I know how you love perfection, but look, not everything in life is perfect." "You can't deadhead your own son." "What?" "Candidates." "If you are ready, we will begin the first of one of our 12 debates." " Twelve?" " Mm-hm." "Why you so fly, though?" "Kenzie, Kaitlin, you guys will be answering first." " Thanks, Mr. Wolfe." " We wrote a song for Ryan Shay." "We hope it will get you up out of your chair and dancing to it in no time." "Your body was The Body" "Till your body hit the floor" "Now your body is no body" "But we know you'll wrestle more" "And more" "And more" "And more and more" "And more and more and more" "Whoo!" "Thanks, everyone." "Tessa, rebuttal?" "What makes a hero?" "Oh, thank you for the support." "I know you all think Ryan is a hero." "But what about Evan?" "Does anybody care that Evan got a perfect score on his PSATs?" "No one wrote a song about that." "Except me." "She's going off the book." "Evan." "Math and vocab are like heaven." "To Evan." "Ow-wai-ya-yow-wa-wa-wa-wa" " Is there a bridge?" " There is too much emphasis on stupid sports and stupid people." "Ryan is not a hero." "He got hurt while wrestling." "Wrestling is dumb." "Academics are the opposite of dumb." "If you elect me I promise I will not let physical education eclipse actual education." "I propose we make gym an elective." "And I'm just asking that you think about it." "More sugar snap peas?" "Sorry." "Are you talking to me?" "Ha, ha." "Of course I am, silly." "Do you want some more sugar snap peas?" " I noticed you finished yours." " I did finish mine." "Okay." "Ha, ha." "Anything exciting happen at school today?" "Uh, well, I'm running Tessa's campaign for student-body president." "Our Lisa, a political mastermind." "I smell a victory dinner in the future." "And it smells like...?" "It smells like...?" "Tuna and shells?" "You got it, genius." "Tuna and shells it is." "Lisa would you like to eat Ryan's dessert?" "I doubt he'll wanna eat this crumbly mess up in his room." "Mr. Altman." "Whoa." "Hey." "Ryan." "Did you wheel over here all by yourself?" "Down the stairs and everything?" "I heard what you said to my mother, so I know there's room in your heart." "Is there room in your house?" "For a dude in a chair?" "That rolls?" "And if so, is there a downstairs bathroom I can use?" "I have to poop." "Wrestling is a sport." "It's not an identity." "What about lacrosse?" "Also a sport." "What about Spider-Man?" "Right." "That's a secret identity, but unrelated to what I'm talking about." "Ahem." "See, you need to start thinking about what makes you who you are." "My hail'." "My eyes..." " ...my Roman nose." " On the inside." "My lungs, my awesome liver." " What you believe in." " Santa Claus, Tupac Shakur." "You don't have to answer the questions the second I ask them, okay?" "Okay." "So serene." "Yeah." "And calm too." "Hey, look at this guy." "It's a tall, stocky guy, and he's painting." "You know?" "Painting." "He's a painter." "Former firefighter, actually." "Used to think it was the only reason I was on planet Earth." "But then the floor collapsed right underneath me, and I fell two stories." "I cracked my back up pretty good." "You mean pretty bad." "I cracked it pretty bad." "It hurt pretty good." "You mean hurt pretty bad." " Is that from the injury?" " Ryan I'm just glad this man discovered after his life-changing accident that he had another amazing gift." "He could start fires with his mind?" "What?" "No." "The painting." " I'm talking about the painting." " Oh." "It's just you said amazing gift, so I was thinking more along those lines:" "Tessa, I beg you." "Please let me do my job." "I'm doing damage control here." "Polls show that people think you're a racist." " Racist?" "That's crazy." " Against jocks." " That's not a race." " Tessa, frankly that's the kind of talk that got us here." "So if you'd lower your voice, I'm trying to spin this into an asset." "You know what, Lisa?" "Not sure this is worth it." "This is a fight I don't think we're gonna win." "Now, you listen to me." " Ow." "I am this close to my own victory dinner." "And I'll be hot-damned if you take that away from me." "This is my moment." "This is my tuna and my shells." "Dad's flower wasn't the only thing blossoming." "His friendship with Ryan Shay had also taken root." "In the desert" "You can't remember your name." "'Cause there ain't no one For to cause you no pain" "God." "That's great stuff, Mr. Altman." "Thanks." "I actually..." "I had a band in college." "Alt." "Man." "Like Altman, get it?" "No, but I trust you." " Were you famous?" " It wasn't about the fame." " So you weren't?" " No." "We played covers mostly." "I always wanted to do our own stuff." "I tried to write a few songs." " But, you know, life got in the way." " Yeah." "Thanks for spending all this time with me, Mr. Alt." "Man." "I just got it." "That's a good one." "I think I know what you've been trying to do, and it worked." " It did?" " Yeah." "If I don't toughen up, I'm gonna turn into some loser singing depressing songs about a horse with no mane." " That's not what that song was..." " So I'm gonna play through the pain." "Even if it kills me, at least I'll die a man." "I can't lick my wounds." "I have to kick them, right?" " What are you doing?" " Kick them." " Kick them." " Ryan..." "I can do it." "Oh, no!" "Aah, ow!" "Whoa." "Ha, ha." "You're walking." "I did it." "Yes, you did." "Never got you, so you say" "But I tried all that really warm month of May." "Girl." " What you doing?" " Hey." "Nothing." "Just noodling with a song I started writing a hundred years ago..." " ...and never finished." " Wait." " Did the Alt." "Man return?" " Ha, ha." "Ah, you know, I just..." "I thought that maybe he should, you know..." "Play through the pain" " Sounds good." " Thanks." "Hey." "What are you doing?" " I'm not fit to serve." " What?" " You're giving up?" " They came out with this slander... saying I'm racist against jocks." "Stupid." "I can't be bothered." "I'm never gonna change these people." "I may not have impressed this upon you enough but it's really important to fight for what you want." "Don't take the easy road." " Are you gonna sing again?" " No." "It feels like you are." "Don't take the easy road" "Even if you've got a heavy load" "I'm just riffing, but I got something here." "I'm also considering doing three or four yeah-yeah-yeahs." "Optional." "I'm not married to the yeahs." "I was thinking something like:" "Yeah" "As George figured out his yeah-yeah-yeahs I realized maybe I had been taking the easy road." "Not by quitting the election but by running at all." "Sorry, Lisa." "It's over." "Is it about the poll numbers?" "I'm not worried." "The only reason I even ran for student council was to avoid spiking a volleyball." "What about my victory dinner?" " Actually, I made a deal with the twins." " Heh." "I agreed to withdraw my name from the ballot and support their ticket." "In exchange for us letting you be our new campaign manager." "Dalia got bored." "Can you taste that tuna and shells?" " Quick push." " That's good." " Hey." " Hey." "If you show me how to spike, I'll do your science homework." "I don't need you to do my homework, weakling." "My grades are perfect." " They are?" " Heads up!" "I said, heads up." "Maybe you can change yourself." "But not on the first try." "Not till he's home." "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "Body!" "I'm back." "The king is back." "Ha, ha." "Way to go, son." "Attaboy!" "Ha, ha." "Thanks, guys." "Feels a lot better being carried when you know you can walk." "Great." "What are we having for dinner?" "Possum marinara?" "Tuna and shells." "I requested it because I know it's your fave." " But..." " Being useless and unpopular and stuck in that wheelchair made me realize what you go through every day of your life." "I'm not in a wheelchair." "Lisa, take the compliment." "It didn't sound like a compliment." "Unbelievable." "Do you or do you not want tuna and shells?" "I do." "Ah." "I knew she did."