"(SIGHS)" "You're not coming in?" "You're gonna make me stand in that deposit line all by myself?" "No, buddy, I will be with you in spirit, like a tiny wood nymph." "Besides, what's your glitch with the ATM machine, anyway?" "It's a people thing, Shawn." "Business should always be done face to face." "Well, if you remember, I'm holding a bit of a grudge against this particular banking institution." "Why, because they turned you down for a small business loan last year?" "Yes, because they turned me down for a small business loan." "That was completely legitimate, Gus." "Shawn, it was for a zip-line pulley system to transport snacks from the kitchen to your desk." "Or the reception area." "What's your point?" "Part of running a business together, Shawn, is sharing in the responsibilities of the business side of the business, like making deposits." "What about the bidnizz side?" "'Cause I feel like I'm more of a bidnizz man." "Who's covering that?" "You know what?" "Fine." "I'll do it myself." "(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO)" "(SCREAMING)" "He's got a gun!" "(ALL CLAMORING)" "Don't anybody move!" "You, go!" "Now, don't anybody move!" "Drop the gun!" "You drop your gun!" "(GUN FIRES)" "(ALL EXCLAIMING)" "Get over there!" "Get back." "MAN:" "Please, sir." "Don't..." "Don't anybody do anything." "(SIRENS WAILING)" "Lassy, Jules, what are you doing here?" "What are you doing here?" "Shawn, we have a situation." "Some guy held up the bank and we think he's taken hostages." "Whoa!" "Whoa, take it easy." "Gus is in there." "I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth" "I know, you know They just don't have any proof" "Embrace the deception Learn how to bend" "Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end" "This is Sue Ellen Jasper reporting to you live outside the Santa Barbara National Savings Bank where an as yet unnamed assailant has attempted to steal over a million dollars worth of diamonds and is now holding hostages inside." "Police are on the scene, but have yet to reveal any further details." "We'll report back to you as soon as we have more information." "JULIET:" "You didn't see anything?" "I wasn't in the bank, Jules." "Whoa!" "Hold it right there." "Why didn't you go into the bank?" "We came here to make a deposit." "That's not really a two-man job." "What, we both should've grabbed a corner of the check and gingerly walked it in together?" "I just find it oddly un-psychic of you to have not known this was going to happen." "I don't see into the future, Jules." "I read things in the present." "And I get it." "You think I'm not kicking myself enough?" "I let my best friend go in there without me and now he's stuck in there and I'm stuck out here." "Detective Lassiter, that guy could be a loose cannon." "Someone needs to go inside the bank." "KAREN:" "O'Hara, I need you to take statements from the remaining witnesses that were outside the bank." "Got it, Chief." "Now, Detective?" "Yeah." "I just want you to know that I've informed the FBI and SWAT and their chief negotiator is moments away." "No." "It's protocol and you know it." "Chief, this thing's already turning into a three-ring circus without bringing those adrenaline monkeys down here." "Look, we have a hostage situation, Detective, and I expect you to fully cooperate." "Just make a call into the bank." "See where we're at." "Maybe I can wrap this thing up here and now." "Save the city a whole lot of time and money." "Somebody needs to call into the bank!" "(TIRES SCREECHING)" "(SIRENS BLARING)" "Heads up, we're on the clock!" "And cut!" "Great." "Dripping with swagger." "Let's go again, though, and maybe ease up on the cocksure smile just a bit." "I liked it, I'm just not sure it's gonna play in the Midwest." "Who the hell are you?" "Oh, my apologies." "I'm Shawn Spencer." "Lead psychic for the SBPD." "And dilettante of shadow puppetry." "What's this?" "What's this right here?" "(MAKING KISSING SOUNDS)" "Oh, that's a swan kissing the moon." "Well, I'm Commander Luntz, hostage negotiator, and I will thank you to step aside and let me handle things from here." "(CARLTON CLEARS THROAT)" "Luntz." "(SIGHING) Lassiter." "Perhaps, as head detective, I can brief you on what's going on here." "Listen, Detective." "I don't wanna play the title game with you." "Title games?" "Is that anything like Celebrity?" "Because if it is," "I'm gonna kick your ass." "What?" "I will." "I'm really good at the game." "Little refresher, I have 26 years of experience and am sort of an expert in human psychology and conditioning so I do know two things." "One, your friend here is acting out of a place of fear." "A little sweat on the temple, a little vibrato in the voice." "This is personal for you." "And number two," "I have about 40 seconds to initiate a call into that bank before all the wheels spin off of this thing." "So, excuse me." "Boys, fire me up a call inside the bank and patch me in." "MAN:" "Yes, sir!" "Right away." "We're not just gonna let him do this, right, Lassy?" "It's protocol." "We have no choice." "(SIGHS)" "(CELL PHONE RINGING)" "Whose phone is that?" "It's his phone." "Thank you, sir." "We're hostages together, we're supposed to be on the same side here." "Give me the phone." "I apologize." "I would, but it's my work phone." "And I get charged the deductible for any lost or stolen items, so how about I just turn the ringer off?" "(ALL EXCLAIMING)" "Everyone, cell phones, now!" "(PHONE RINGING)" "This is Commander Luntz." "My friends call me Luntz." "You are?" "That's good." "That's fine." "You don't have to say anything." "I can do all the talking for now." "I'm real good at these one-sided conversations, just ask my ex-wife." "LUNTZ:" "What about you?" "You married?" "Get those guys away from the bank!" "Tell them to get the hell back!" "I can do that." "Do it now!" "Well, you got to do something for me then." "That's how these things work." "What?" "How about we start with a name." "You give me your name and I will back those guys so far up they'll have to put two stamps on any letter they mail to you." "How's that?" "Like he's just gonna give him his name." "Phil, that's good." "I've got a nephew named Phillip." "He's a real rascal." "He's got a killer arm for an eight-year-old." "Plays right field." "What's your last name, Phil?" "Get them back!" "Well, I just need to know who I'm dealing with." "That's how I can help you." "Otherwise, these guys with the guns, they get really, really nervous." "So, if we get to know each other, we can be friends." "Then I can vouch for you, and I can protect you." "I protect all my friends." "Stubbins." "Stubbins." "I'm on it." "My fiancé, Michael Lenhart is in there!" "He's a diabetic." "He's gonna need to eat soon." "Help him, please!" "Okay, okay, just stay calm." "(WHISPERING) Hey, there's a woman over there who's hysterical." "Her fiancé is..." "Now, look, Phil, nobody's in a rush here." "I'm in this for the long haul as long as you are, so we'll take our time, but you have a bunch of hungry people in there and you've got a young guy who's a diabetic" "and his fiancée is out here worried about him." "You know how women worry." "So, it would go a long way if you let me send you guys some food in there." "You like pizza?" "That's because you don't understand how protocol works." "You may have gotten Guster in real trouble in there, dialing his cell phone." "At least I did something." "Look, Shawn." "He is SWAT and he is good at what he does." "I am fine with backing off here." "He's SWAT?" "He's SWAT?" "That's your argument?" "He's not Colin Farrell." "I get that you are concerned about Gus, but I can assure you, he is in capable hands." "(WHISPERING) Hey, there's a woman over there who's hysterical." "Her fiancé is..." "Wait a minute." "I get what's happening here." "You do?" "Yes, I do." "I'm sensing a relationship here." "You are?" "Yes, you and Luntz." "There's a familial thing happening." "He's like an older uncle." "What?" "Are you related to him?" "Not yet." "Lassiter!" "What?" "He's psychic." "Shouldn't he know already?" "Know what?" "What is he getting at?" "It's nothing." "But I do know Cameron..." "Luntz." "Commander Cameron Luntz." "Cameron?" "Yes." "And he is not my uncle." "I met him at a police district conference." "He asked me out." "We went on a few dates." "I like him." "(LAUGHING) Oh, my God!" "You're dating this guy?" "Ding, ding, ding." "Tell him what he won, O'Hara!" "Lassiter!" "Look, Shawn, I was..." "Don't..." "Don't..." "Don't worry." "It's fine, Jules, really." "Dare I say, dandy?" "Isn't that a word from his generation?" "That's not fair." "And, look, I was gonna talk to you about it earlier, but..." "That's great." "It's really great, congratulations." "I'm so, so happy for you." "Now, if you'll excuse me," "I have a best friend to save." "Chief, elder Commanding Officer Luntz, you need to let me get involved here." "You need to let me scope things out." "Absolutely not." "You're not a trained tactical officer, Spencer." "Are we positive he's even house trained?" "(SCOFFS) Okay." "All right, maybe you and I got off on the wrong foot." "And you know what?" "You're correct." "I have had a few close calls around the house recently." "But I can help you." "Oh?" "How's that?" "What do you know about this guy, other than his name?" "We know that he's a longtime customer of this bank." "Owed a huge load of back-taxes to the IRS, just had his house foreclosed on." "And he's a middle child." "You know he's a middle child?" "I can hear it in the timbre of his voice, and the fact that he doesn't use contractions, yes." "Okay, fine." "What about everyone else in the bank?" "Look, you send your guy in there and what?" "Maybe he gets you a guesstimate of how many hostages there are?" "I can walk into that bank, I can psychically read every single hostage and Stubbins." "He's freaked out." "He won't talk to you." "He doesn't need to." "I can read his mind." "Can you read my mind right now?" "'Cause it's sending a very clear message where I want you to be." "(CELL PHONE RINGING)" "Sir!" "Luntz here." "PHIL:" "Do you think I'm stupid?" "What are you talking about?" "I can see what you are doing." "You are sending a cop in here with the pizzas." "Just look, Phil." "Calm down now, that's just for everybody's safety." "That's all." "Well, it is not happening." "I'll bring them up there myself if you like." "I do not think so." "You will send in a regular person." "Regular person?" "Yes, a regular person." "You will send in someone from behind those barricades." "A regular person, not a cop." "What the hell is he doing?" "I wouldn't accept these if I were you." "Spencer!" "Just put the pizzas down and walk away." "Get out of there." "Eight pies, four of them are vegetable." "What?" "Is this guy for real?" "No pepperoni?" "Really?" "Plus the blatant disregard and utter criminal lack of ham and pineapple?" "Spencer..." "What kind of good faith negotiation is this?" "I mean, this is a hostage negotiation!" "Well, I don't care if you're not happy with the ingredients!" "Put the pizzas down and walk away!" "I won't let you accept these." "Walk away!" "This is my operation!" "Go get him." "Go get him out of there!" "Sir." "Sir..." "He's not going to accept the... (SCREAMS)" "SWAT OFFICER:" "All right then, move!" "Fan out!" "Fan out!" "Fan out!" "Go, go, go, go!" "Spencer!" "SWAT OFFICER:" "Everybody fall back!" "(SIGHS)" "Terrific." "Put those pizzas down, right over there." "All right, Phil, I am just as mad about this as you are." "Why don't you let me go out there and make this right?" "On the way back in, I'll have them throw in a couple of liters of old fashioned root beer and some Cinnastars." "They're like Cinnadots, they're just pointy." "They're good." "They're not great." "But I can get them, free of charge." "I'll be right back." "You're not going anywhere." "You've just become my next hostage." "GUS:" "Why does he keep separating everybody?" "Jules is dating an old SWAT guy?" "We are in a hostage situation, Shawn!" "You don't get that?" "I do get it." "What I don't get is the bulletproof vest over the shirt, what is that?" "I'm telling you, something's not right with this guy." "I mean, he makes us take our shoes off." "Who does that?" "Why?" "It's a way of containing people." "You know, slowing them down and whatnot." "So we can't run away when he starts shooting us!" "He's gonna start killing us off one by one." "Oh, my God!" "Would you please relax?" "Clearly, I have a handle on the situation." "A handle?" "A handle?" "You mouthed off to him and got yourself taken hostage!" "Of course I did." "That was my plan all along, you sweet dollop of spicy goodness." "I had to get myself in there, so I could see what I'm dealing with." "I have this feeling that we are not dealing with the person they think we are." "Why would a bank robber keep his safety on?" "So help me out." "Think." "What do you remember seeing the moment that the robbery went down?" "Features?" "Noses?" "Maybe a chin?" "I did see a chin, a beautiful one." "A glorious one." "There's a good chance she's over 100." "Are you sure you've thought this through?" "Not her, Shawn!" "SHAWN:" "Oh!" "I've had a lot of time to think in here, Shawn." "And I've realized some things about life." "It's been two hours." "Yes, but two hours hostage time." "Things happen fast in here, Shawn." "Life is fleeting." "And I need to live it." "I need to say the things I'm feeling and act on those feelings before it's too late." "And so do you." "Okay." "In other news..." "Phil!" "Phil!" "What are you..." "What are you doing?" "You wanna get yourself shot?" "What?" "Sorry." "Nothing!" "Our bad." "You just go back to your whole robbering thing." "I need to potty." "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." "I'm sorry, everyone." "I downed an Orange Julius right before I was taken captive and it went right through me." "I need to potty, okay?" "I know my body, and I know my stomach, and this could get really ugly." "All right." "All right, all right." "All right, don't anybody move." "I'm watching you." "I'm just gonna be right here." "Don't move." "You know I'm not really a regular person, right, Phil?" "What does that mean?" "'Cause I tried once and failed." "I'm just too unique and interesting." "The French call it du fromage, which, loosely translated, means "of cheese."" "The truth is, I'm actually a psychic, a professional one." "And I am getting a major reading right in here." "You are?" "(EXCLAIMS) There it goes again." "What?" "What's it saying?" "It's saying that you are a middle child." "Yes, yes, I am!" "It is also saying that you are not a bank robber." "You know this?" "Yes." "Very much so." "There is something else at play here, Phil." "Something nefarious and also evil." "Oh, God!" "You do know!" "All right!" "Okay." "I can't keep up this ruse any longer." "Please, how's my wife?" "Your wife?" "Yes, is she scared?" "Is she scared?" "Uh..." "Yes, she is scared." "Oh, my God." "Joanna, I am so sorry." "Can you, can you get a message to her?" "Yes." "I believe I can, yes." "Joanna." "Joanna." "Listen, Joanna, this morning" "I was confronted by a man, I don't know who, and he told me that he had kidnapped you and was holding you somewhere and if I didn't walk into this bank right then and get him these diamonds and drop them in a mailbox" "down the road, he was gonna kill you." "I screwed up." "And I don't know how to get out of this, honey, I'm so sorry." "Oh, wow." "Phil, that was something." "I mean, it was just really jam packed with information." "It was also a little breathy." "Oddly soothing." "She said not to worry." "Everything is going to be okay." "But how?" "You don't have to..." "Okay." "But how?" "I mean, I feel like I'm being watched, by the cops, but by someone in here." "Phil, I will help you, but you have to trust me." "I am working with the police department." "I know who all the players are out there." "I will get you out of this bank and I will find out where your wife is." "But you have to let me lead this negotiation." "Do you think you can do that?" "I think so." "Okay, here's the plan." "First, keep up the crazy-guy routine." "We need that." "All right." "But do not speak to anyone here, unless I am with you." "Secondly, you're gonna have to give me some privacy." "I wasn't kidding about the Orange Julius." "(CELL PHONE RINGING)" "Luntz, here." "I have some info for you." "Stubbins is not behind this." "Someone..." "Look, Spencer, the first thing you got to realize about these guys is that they will try to manipulate anybody they can to get out of there alive." "I think that you have interfered and screwed up enough, don't you?" "Why don't you find yourself a quiet little corner in there and lay low." "Copy?" "But I'm telling... (SIGHS)" "Kenny, I need to talk to you!" "Yes, sir!" "What's up, sir?" "(CELL PHONE RINGING)" "Hello?" "Lhasa apsos." "I have an idea that might put you back front and center on this case." "I'm listening." "Stubbins isn't behind the robbery." "Somebody kidnapped his wife and put him up to it." "Spencer, you know that sounds a little nutsy, right?" "What do you have to lose?" "Just send a couple black and whites out to look for the wife and see what blows back." "How can you be so sure that... (FLUSHING) What was that sound?" "Spencer?" "Hey, McNab!" "Yes, sir?" "I've got something I'm gonna send you out on." "Okay." "PHIL:" "What are we doing in the bank manager's office?" "I've taken the liberty of putting together a list of demands that you can give to Luntz." "Demands?" "Yup." "Yeah, we're gonna call out there and you're just gonna read these off to him." ""My demands, by Phil." ""An airplane to take me wherever I want." ""Tour bus, blue, with full tank of gas and groupies."" "That's nonnegotiable." ""$5,000 in unmarked bills."" "This is a huge list." "What if they won't get me any of this stuff?" "I don't expect them to, Phil." "It's just to buy us time, so that we can figure out who in here has put you up to this." ""A zip-line pulley system used to transport deliciously flavored snacks" ""and such from one location to another." What is this?" "Look, just call out to Luntz, okay?" "And remember, I need to speak to him first." "SHAWN:" "What do you know about this guy, other than his name?" "LUNTZ:" "We know that his house was foreclosed on." "Luntz, it's Phil." "Hey there, friend." "I was wondering why I haven't heard from you." "Well, I am going to put Shawn..." "Spencer?" "Shawn Spencer on the phone." "He will be negotiating on my behalf from here on in." "No, no, Phil." "Don't do that." "That's a mistake." "This is between you and me..." "Hey, Cam, it's Shawn." "What's up, buddy?" "(SIGHS) Spencer, put Stubbins on the phone." "Now!" "(CHUCKLING) Eeh, that's..." "That's gonna be a little awkward." "I'm not really sure how to put this, and bear with me 'cause this is my first hostage negotiation." "But it would appear that I am, in fact, making the demands now." "So, why don't you go ahead and put Detective O'Hara on the phone, please." "Why in the world would I do that?" "Oh, I don't know, isn't the timbre of my voice telling you why?" "It's Spencer." "Shawn, are you all right?" "Jules, how serious is this thing with you and Luntz, really?" "(SIGHING) I am so not having this conversation with you right now." "Is he standing next to you, sniffing your hair?" "Huh?" "Is he listening to me?" "Shawn, half the Santa Barbara Police Department can hear us." "Okay, fine, you're right." "I'm sorry, I don't know what I was thinking." "Just answer me this." "Does he have those older guy boobies, that sort of droop at the ends?" "Okay, I'm hanging up on you now." "Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on." "I'm putting Phil..." "I'm putting Phil on for Luntz." "Hey there, buddy, you there?" "Yeah." "Okay." "First, I need a plane." "(CHUCKLES)" "(WOMAN CHATTERING ON POLICE RADIO)" "Oh, gosh." "Shh." "(WHISPERING) This bank sucks." "Wait a minute, you're the bank manager." "Yes, I'm Nathaniel Gresling." "Do you recall rejecting a small business loan for a zip-line snack transportation system, calling it, and I quote," ""Fiscally irresponsible"?" "Shawn..." "Yes, I do." "Well, Mr. Nathaniel Gresling, this little task of retrieving the Mini Oreos took me 14 seconds." "Zip-line?" "(IMITATES WHOOSHING) Five." "Fiscally irresponsible?" "Nay!" "I call that my fiscal obligation to my shareholders, namely, Gus here." "Shawn!" "Look," "I'm sorry, you think that was all my decision?" "I'm just a dupe for the upper management." "I don't have the power you think I do." "We understand, Mr. Gresling." "I'm still a little fuzzy on the details." "Do you remember what happened this morning, when Mr. Stubbins came into the bank?" "I remember him entering the bank and he approached me." "I was busy with a customer, but he caught my attention." "He asked me to take him to the safety deposit vault, which I did." "GUS:" "Hmm." "GRESLING:" "Once inside the vault he drew his gun." "How do you suppose he knew about those diamonds?" "The diamonds were deposited in that particular box one week prior." "I very distinctly remember Mr. Stubbins being in the bank that day." "How do you distinctly remember that?" "Well, the gentleman who deposited the diamonds was a very wealthy customer, who management considers to be a VIP client." "Therefore, I'm instructed to treat him as such." "Right." "Mr. Stubbins was in the bank before to get to his safety deposit box, but I skipped him over." "That never feels good." "He was very upset." "He complained." "I felt bad for him and maybe this was my mistake, but I told him that the gentleman was depositing some very valuable merchandise." "Oh." "Therefore, he knew about the diamonds." "Right." "Don't beat yourself up, man." "It's not your fault." "Thank you very much." "(SIGHS)" "God." "Nothing is agreeing with me today." "Excuse me." "I'm gonna have to take care of some more business." "Phil, buddy." "What are you doing?" "They're going to meet all my demands." "Seriously?" "Even the plane?" "Yeah." "What about the snack line?" "Yeah." "They wanted me to come take a look at the bus." "It's not blue." "Is that okay?" "Yeah." "You have a shot, take it." "(ALL SCREAMING)" "SNIPER O VER WALKIE-TALKIE:" "Negative on the target, sir." "How did you miss?" "He just fell out of my scope." "Very strange." "Free hugs." "Who's next?" "Well, we're still coming to you from outside the National Savings Bank where the hostage situation has escalated." "Shawn Spencer, psychic detective for the Santa Barbara Police Department, is now inside the bank." "And is not only a hostage..." "You got to be kidding me." "... he appears to be calling the shots on behalf of the now named assailant," "Phillip Stubbins." "Oh, this can't be good." "(GROANING)" "Dude, don't even sit by me right now." "They already hate me for the phone thing," "I don't need them to know I'm friends with the guy that kept them from being rescued." "Okay, you know something, maybe before you admonish me with that tone of voice, you'd like to hear my insanely good news." "What?" "As a sign of cooperation," "Phil and I are going to release a hostage, you happy now?" "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" "Okay." "I knew you'd get me released!" "Thank you!" "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait." "Dude, it's not you." "What?" "Think about it for a minute." "Oh, my God." "Oh, my God." "I'm a horrible person." "There's older people here and women." "Shawn, are you ready?" "Phil, I will be with you in one minute." "What?" "You are the hostage being released?" "Gus..." "I can't believe this!" "I have a hunch about where Phil's wife is being held." "I think it's directly linked to a list of foreclosed houses in the area." "And I have to check it out." "Don't you see?" "It's got to be me!" "Just figure this out and get me out of here before there's a red laser light shining on my forehead." "And be careful, Shawn." "I will, buddy." "Oh, and, Shawn, I just want you to know that no matter what happens," "I care about you and I appreciate you." "And, well," "I love you, Shawn." "Okay, buddy, I hear you." "You know I'm gonna be back in like a half an hour, right?" "Wow, that is a tight hug." "All right." "All right." "Okay." "Okay, I'm pretty sure Gresling is our guy." "You are?" "Yeah." "This morning when you walked into the bank, you didn't find him, he found you." "His hands were quicker than your gun." "What?" "Just stay away from him, say nothing." "Do not pick up the bank line." "Do not field any calls until I return." "Okay?" "All right." "Shawn, I love my wife." "I know you do, man." "(CROWD CHEERING)" "MAN:" "You did it!" "All right, go get him!" "All right, put him in a holding van, I wanna debrief him." "No, no." "No way, Luntz." "This is our guy, any debriefing is gonna be done by us." "No, this is my investigation." "Well, guys, guys, I appreciate you arguing over me, but let me just point out," "I'm not wearing briefs." "Commander Luntz, Mr. Spencer is in our department, so we'll debrief him first, but we'll share any information that we gather." "Hands off." "Shawn!" "Shawn!" "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" "Dad?" "Hurry up." "What are you doing down here?" "Look, I don't know what you and Gus have gotten yourselves into, but I came down here to warn you." "Warn me of what?" "This guy doing the negotiating, he's done negotiating." "Meaning?" "He's getting ready to take this guy out." "Yeah, Dad, I know." "He already took a shot." "Yes, but Shawn, he's getting ready to go in with tear gas." "I've seen it before." "It's not pretty." "(SIGHING) How much time do I have?" "I don't know." "Hour, tops." "(SIGHS) All right." "Thanks, Dad." "Shawn, you be careful." "All right." "(ALL WHOOPING)" "Hi, Shawn Spencer." "Thanks for coming out." "It means a lot." "HENRY:" "Shawn!" "WOMAN:" "Call me." "Look, Lassy, I am telling you that Stubbins is not behind this and I know at the very least that Gresling, the bank manager, is involved." "It's a moot point." "He's gonna do what he's gonna do." "There are hostages in there." "I know that, my best friend is one of them." "If we can get out of here and find this guy's wife, we can show that the kidnapping thing holds water." "Look, I am breaking about 50 codes of police procedure just by talking to you about this." "Ah, the code!" "That is your biggest problem." "Oh, it's my problem?" "Yeah, just once, could you grab life by the little Lassiters and follow your instincts?" "I know you don't like my methods, I know you don't like me." "But we are pressed for time and I am telling you, I am vibing like crazy." "Can we screw protocol and get the hell out of here?" "You take shotgun." "You are so sexy right now." "(INAUDIBLE)" "Where are you going?" "I'm sorry." "But you're not the only one here who has a job to do." "Wait, are we still on for tonight?" "CARLTON:" "All right, where am I driving?" "SHAWN:" "Just head down to State Street." "Then you're gonna be making a left on Laporte." "Yes, left." "I'm being drawn there by the wife now." "All right, Jules, give me one good reason, why you find this guy attractive." "Shawn!" "You can't give me one?" "I can think of many." "Is one of them that you're looking forward to giving him sponge baths in the near future?" "I happen to find his age and his maturity appealing." "He's distinguished and virile." "And most importantly, he knows who he is." "And that is attractive." "You two know I'm in the van, right?" "Here!" "Stop here." "This is it." "She's being held right in there." "All right, Spencer." "You stay put." "I will not be responsible for you." "O'Hara, we go on three." "You ready?" "One, two..." "Can I say it?" "Let me say it." "Hey." "(SOFTLY) Shawn, get back in the car, this could be dangerous!" "I will, but I have to tell you something." "Shawn, get back in the car!" "Go out with Luntz." "What?" "I want you to go out with Luntz." "Shawn!" "What are you trying to pull?" "I'm not trying to pull anything." "I just want you to be happy." "So, if you think this guy can make you happy or even if you're not sure and there's a tiny part of you that thinks that there might be a chance for that, I think you owe it to yourself to go for it." "Thank you, Shawn." "You're welcome." "When are you supposed to go out next?" "Tonight, actually..." "Wow!" "That's so fast." "Where's he gonna take you?" "Mario's." "Mario's?" "That place is a little stuffy, don't you think?" "I like their bread." "Clear!" "Clear!" "Split!" "Spencer, what the hell are you doing?" "I told you to stay in the car!" "If I'd stayed in the car, I wouldn't be able to tell you that someone just took off running that way through the yard!" "They're gone." "CARLTON:" "I'll call in a perimeter request, get canine down here." "You wanna help me with this gag?" "Yeah." "(SNIFFLING)" "Hello, Joanna." "I have a message from your husband." "I'm gonna try to make contact one more time and then that's it." "Prepare to go in with the gas." "(PHONE RINGING)" "You, come on." "What do you want?" "Come on." "Right now." "Right now." "Why?" "What do you want?" "Oh!" "Don't move." "Don't talk!" "Look at the floor!" "Look at the floor!" "Come on!" "Right now." "What?" "Right now." "In here." "In here." "Get in there." "What?" "(GRUNTS)" "You have my wife!" "What are you talking about?" "You know where she is." "Tell me where she is." "I don't know what you're talking about." "You know where she is, tell me where she is." "I swear." "You're crazy!" "Where's my wife?" "GRESLING:" "I don't know." "I'm gonna shoot you right now!" "Where is my wife?" "All right, Mrs. Stubbins, what can you tell us about the man that kidnapped you?" "Well, there were actually two men." "Two?" "Are you sure?" "(GRUNTING) Where's my wife?" "(GRUNTS)" "I was blindfolded, but through a crack in the bottom," "I was able to make out two pairs of feet." "I didn't see much, but I know one of them was wearing a pair of brown wingtip shoes." "I got it." "The other one's in the bank." "I got to call Phil and warn him." "(PHONE RINGING)" "(GUN COCKING)" "That's it, men, it's go time." "Hit him with the tear gas, and go in on my call." "(SWAT TEAM CLAMORING)" "SWAT OFFICER:" "Watch your back!" "Stay there!" "Hold your men!" "JULIET:" "Morgan Phelps is the second man inside the bank." "Canine caught the guy running away from the house who gave him up." "But I don't get the bank manager." "Gresling knew the bank was gonna be robbed?" "He planned the whole thing from the beginning." "He knew that his VIP client had dropped off the diamonds." "The diamonds were deposited in that particular box one week prior." "He figured this was his chance to score big, so he contacted Morgan Phelps." "JULIET:" "Who has a rap sheet as long as my arm." "So, why didn't Phelps just steal the diamonds himself?" "They didn't need a professional bank robber because Gresling would basically just be handing the diamonds over." "And Phil was a perfect mark." "They could put him at the bank on the day the diamonds were delivered." "That, plus the back taxes and the recent foreclosure made him seem like a really desperate guy who needed cash in a big way." "So Phelps plants himself in the bank to make sure everything goes smoothly and then finds himself caught as a hostage when the whole deal goes sour." "I'll keep trying Luntz, but I'm pretty sure he's blocked all calls not coming from inside the bank." "We need to get back there before he goes in." "Luntz!" "Have your guys grab Gresling, the bank manager." "Take him into custody." "He's in on it." "We're looking for Phelps." "Who?" "Phelps." "Have you accounted for all the hostages?" "We're counting bodies now." "It's a mess out here." "SHAWN:" "All right." "There's no wing tips." "Phelps is gone." "He must've taken off somewhere." "When did you last see him?" "We were being held in the back room." "I know where Phelps is." "Where?" "He's in the sewer." "He's in the sewer system!" "That's ridiculous." "Is it, Luntz?" "All right, I do know this much." "If someone were to access the sewer system out back it would dump them almost anywhere in the city." "Luntz, I'm a psychic, you're just gonna have to trust me." "Plus, listen to my voice." "It's even." "It's steady." "No vibrato." "Gus, quick!" "Help me boost Lassy up to the ceiling." "Phelps is inside one of these ducts." "What?" "Then what happened to the whole psychic sewer vision thing?" "Lassy, do we really have time to answer these questions?" "Now, come on, just give me one of those size 12 narrows." "Give me the other!" "(GRUNTING)" "(CARLTON GRUNTING)" "Freeze!" "Come here!" "I got him!" "Good work, partner!" "We'll grab back-up." "Partner?" "Uh, excuse me?" "What was that about?" "Well, you got to admit, it's better than a little boy cat or a little girl cat." "Not appreciated, Shawn." "But, look at you, man, surviving a bank hostage crisis and still looking all "Poitier on a hot day."" "What?" "Go ahead, slap me in the face." "Tell me they call you "Mr. Tibbs."" "I'm not doing that." "Come on, it'll make you feel better." "They call me, Mr..." "I'm not doing that." "(LAUGHING) Look at you." "You were one word away." "Come on." "What do they call you?" "Can we get in the car?" "They call you, what?" "They call you, Mr... (LAUGHS)" "(KNOCKING ON DOOR)" "Jules!" "Hi." "What are you..." "Evidence turned these over to me." "I think they're Gus's shoes." "So, I just..." "I thought I'd bring them by and drop them off." "That is very sweet of you." "You can burn them." "What?" "He was devastated the whole way home." "He cried about them already, on my shoulder, like a baby." "I just put him down." "He's resting now." "So what is this?" "What am I seeing here?" "This is the "returning footwear to a friend" outfit?" "Oh, Cameron had to cancel tonight." "No." "Yeah." "No!" "Yeah, he said he took, like, four showers, but he still couldn't get that sewer smell out of his skin." "Ah!" "Jeez, that damn sewer." "We wrapped everything up so nicely so that you guys could..." "But you know what?" "The man followed a hunch." "And that's all you can ask from a guy." "Hey, follow your hunches." "And he did." "I'm sorry it didn't work out for you kids." "But you gave it a real shot, a fair shot." "Shawn, I'm seeing him tomorrow night." "Really?" "Wow, that's so fast on the rescheduling." "It's..." "No conflicts either way?" "Huh." "Yeah, we'll see." "Well, I should go." "Hey, have you..." "Have you eaten?" "No." "Well, I can't offer anything as fancy as Mario's, but..." "What do you think of a Ball Park Frank and a stroll on the boardwalk?" "It is golden time." "I've been told, I..." "I look pretty good in that lighting." "Really?" "It's true." "Is that right?" "(WHIRRING)" "(CHUCKLES)" "They plump when you cook them." "They plump?" "Literally." "As the temperature rises, the wiener absorbs all additional moisture." "Causing it to double." "Sometimes even triple in diameter." "Triple?" "Wow!" "In between the lines there's a lot of obscurity" "I'm not inclined to resign to maturity" "If it's all right then you're all wrong" "But why bounce around to the same damn song?" "You'd rather run when you can't crawl" "I know, you know That I'm not telling the truth" "I know, you know They just don't have any proof" "Embrace the deception Learn how to bend" "Your worst inhibitions tend to psych you out in the end" "I know, you know" "I know, you know"