"Your Honor, these people are lying." "I swear on the Bhagawad Gita." "This is the first dialogue of the play, but where is the Gita?" "And what about the portrait of Gandhi behind that chair?" "Sorry, Ma'aM, I forgot." "I'll get it done." "How Much longer do I wait, madam Art Director?" "Here you are trying to set up this court while... tomorrow is the hearing at the actual court!" "Where is your brother Abbas?" "Sir... you know how Much I've struggled to pay the legal fees." "Trying to keep up with this case for the last three years... I was forced to sell My taxi." "And now he is driving the taxi for the people who bought it!" "Sir, after our father passed away his elder brother seized our land illegally." "Now he wants the house that we live in." "If we win this case, the house will remain ours and... we will be close to our father's memories." "Yes, sir." "Please." "tomorrow the ruling should be in our favor." "Don't worry, Abbas." "tomorrow in the court, the ball will be in our court!" "We will win." "But you've been assuring us for the past three years!" "This isn't an assurance, it's a guarantee, Sania." "Abbas, I've worked the case in such a Manner that the accused will also pay compensation for the Mental harassment they've caused us." "Really?" "Yes, the judge will be so impressed with My plea that... before he can pass the judgment he will say... I aM shocked!" "The arguments and evidence presented by Abbas Ali's lawyer... clearly state that the disputed property doesn't belong to..." "Abbas Ali." "The rightful owner of the property is Ashfaq Ali." "Now he can sue Abbas Ali for Mental harassment." "Case is dismissed!" "Hey wait... where are you running?" "come here!" "You've ruined Me!" " Abbas, I'M your lawyer." " lawyer?" "You're the last nail in the coffin!" "We'll appeal the case higher... I'll send you higher!" "Abbas!" "Abbas!" "You went overboard, Abbas!" "You beat up your lawyer outside the court!" "Thankfully Sania called Me and I posted your bail." "Before doing something like that, didn't you think about your sister?" "Uncle, I did think about Sania and that's why I Merely beat him up." "Otherwise I would've smashed him with the judge's gavel!" "Abbas, I agree we've been deceived... but that doesn't Mean you go on a killing spree." "What do you want Me to do, Sania?" "What do I do?" "We've lost father's house." "The taxi owner has refused Me from driving his taxi." "He says I'M a convict." "In such a situation one is bound to lose control." "Take it easy, Abbas." "Take it easy." "Sania, get him some tea." "Go get some tea." "Now I've realised why the Taj Mahal is called a 'wonder'." "What do you Mean?" "Shah Jahan built the Taj Mahal without a bank loan." "A wonder!" "The Middle class person has such basic desires." "A six figure salary, five working days... a four wheeler... a three bedroom apartment... two kids and a life partner." "But the fact is... the heaviest burden a Man can have is his empty pocket." "Abbas!" "You value the good times only after going through tough times." "Thank you, uncle." "For confirming that I aM going through tough times." "It's good to understand your predicament but... it's foolish to cry over it." "listen, you and Sania should come with Me to Ranakpur." "Ranakpur?" "Yes!" "Your father and I weren't Merely friends." "We were More like brothers." "Now, you will do as I say." "If you stay back here you'll see your cousins everyday and curse your life." "I will try My best to get you ajob at the place I'M working." "Ranakpur is an amazing place." "There's no politics there, and no Mad rush like the city." "It's peaceful everywhere you go." "Happiness..." "Serene and calm..." "Help!" "I've been working for the Raghuvanshi family since 30 years." "Earlier I worked for the father and now for his son, Prithviraj." "Prithviraj is a great human being." "He is passionate about two things." "First..." "And the second is... to speak English better than the English themselves!" "'Early to double bed and early to wake up fast..." "Makes a Male healthy, strong and oversMart!" "'" "'Eat lots and lots of walnuts, tighten your loincloth... and fight with bare hands, no knives, no forks!" "'" "Even More than the English language... he loves his sister, Radhika, very Much." "Right now Radhika is studying in a Delhi university." "But when it comes to the prosperity and progress of Ranakpur..." "Prithviraj is always at the forefront!" "This year he will also begin work on the Deteron power plant." "But every now and then the power plant project is disrupted by his cousin, Vikrant." "And that adds fuel to their decade's old family feud." "Vikrant is against both Prithviraj and the power project." "Prithviraj seems like an honest and righteous Man." "I think your decision to get Abbas ajob here is absolutely right." "Prithviraj hates one thing though." "What?" "lies." "How do you feel?" "Doctor, I'M in a lot of pain." "Have some water." "Thank you!" "Save Me!" "Not, 'save Me'." "'saved... saved.'" "He brought you here." "Tell Me something... who is the Monster that did this to you?" "I did." "I beat him up." "You beat him up and then got him here?" "There was a lot of dirt in him." "It was necessary to get it out." "As for bringing him here, its compassion." "But what did he do?" "What did he do?" "Fraud!" "Though he was the supervisor, he embezzled 99 Rupees." "Just 99 Rupees?" "It's not about 99 Rupees!" "The thing is he lied!" "Prithviraj Raghuvanshi worships the truth." "And buries the one who lies." "Everyways, doctor... be it sunrise or sunfall, five star backhand service." "Nurse, keep window shopping open, let atmosphere come in." "Maakhan!" "Sir?" "Bring freshful flowers and fruitables." "lMpossible!" "Rest in peace!" "listen!" "Sir?" "Next time you lie... you can let go of the reward... because I'll do the deed." " Maakhan!" " Sir?" "Get someone else in his place." "That idiot, Ravi, he is late yet again." "He isn't a son, but a curse." "He is reason for My ill-health!" "Uncle, I'M sure there's a reason for him being late." "There is only one reason!" "His third-class Aflatoon drama company." "come on fast." "There he is." "Abbas!" "Sania!" "My friend Abbas!" "You are finally here!" " Hi, welcome Sania." " Thank you." "Well, I've visited you a lot in Delhi and so... we welcome you on your first visit to Ranakpur." "The thing is we didn't even change our costumes to come and see you..." "But you are still late!" "I've been standing here because of you!" "You aren't the proverbial coin to stand on its side." "You could've sat on the bench, Shastri." "Shastri?" "Show some respect!" "At least honor the character of lord ram!" "Calling your father by his name!" "It depends on who the father is!" "You can't compare King Dashrath with Shastri." " Ravi!" " Shastri!" " Take the luggage!" " Okay." "drama company, come on!" "Your drama company really is Aflatoon!" "A play in every village?" "Dude, we are vagabonds." "And vagabonds do their own thing." "I only want half a cup." "Shastri!" "The cup will be full, but fill it only half with tea, Sania." "That's nice." "Very good." "Sania, I was thinking, now that you are here... why don't you decorate the stage for the Aflatoon drama company?" "We won't get a better art director than you." "What do you say, Abbas?" "Great!" "Finally someone wise in this bunch ofjokers!" " Shastri!" " Ravi!" "Hey... hold on!" "At least tell Me what is the theme of your play?" "I'll have to think along those lines." "Sania, people get inspired by plays and Make films." "But for the first time I've written this play inspired by films." "Really?" "What is the name of your play?" "GolMaal!" "Brilliant!" "What else can be expected from idiots like you!" "Useless!" "GolMaal!" "GolMaal!" "All day this old Man keeps talking nonsense." "We can't even rehearse over here because of him." "Why not?" "The old Man is home!" " Shastri!" " Ravi!" " Shastri!" " Ravi!" "Wait a Minute!" "You are Shastri and he is Ravi." " Yes." " Right." "If not here, then where do you rehearse?" "Sir!" "My father used to say that... a Man should respect his values and his Moustache." "Moustache is the Mirror of human soul and Mind, sir." "Moustache is the Mirror of the Mind, sir?" "Impressive!" "Your father has such remarkable thinking." "What you've said is priceless!" "A Man who has no Moustache, has no Mind!" "By the way, where is your father?" "Sir, My father passed away four years ago." "That's good." "Oops!" "Cut!" "Cut!" "Blackout!" "Next scene!" "Wow!" "Such great acting!" "Your play is a superhit!" "Thank you, Abbas!" "Abbas... I want you to pray that... just as My first play, Alibaba and the 15 Thieves... even this play is a success." "15 Thieves?" "Didn't Alibaba have 40 Thieves?" "We enact this in villages and budgets are an issue." "Therefore, Alibaba and the 15 Thieves!" " Ravi..." " Yes?" "I've a list of things I would need." "Very good." "Kailash..." "lucky... take Sania along to Pichku's store." "And buy everything on credit, okay?" "Budget is a Major problem." "Chintu, get down or you Might fall." "Ravi, please tell him." "Chintu..." "Chintu..." "What are you doing up there?" "Get down!" "You Might fall." " Ravi..." " Yes?" "Why is that temple over there locked?" "Abbas, this temple stands on the border of Ranakpur and Kherwada." "This is the result of hostility between the two villages." "A 'no entry' sign at the temple door." "Chintu!" "Chintu!" "someone save My son." "someone save My son." "My son... he can't swim!" "My son!" "What do you think you're doing?" "Have you lost it?" "You'll get into trouble, if you step into the temple." "let's go away from here." "My son..." "Thank you so Much!" "You saved My son." "Abbas!" "What did you do?" "You broke the temple lock?" "That kid would've drowned!" "But still... let's get away from here." "Wait!" " Who the hell do you think you are?" " Mister..." "listen to Me." " Where are you from?" " Just listen to Me." "let Me explain." "Hey..." "listen..." "You are beyond My thoughts, Vikrant!" "At the slightest provocation you erupt like a volcano." "Cousin!" "Don't get into this." "For years this Matter has been a bone of contention between us." "Vikrant!" "You're shooting in broad daylight!" "We've already warned you about this." "We can arrest you for this conduct." " But this guy broke the..." " SP Sir... he broke the temple lock in order to save the boy's life." "I believe this is the will of the almighty." "If we lock the temple once again... we will go against religious traditions... it will be inauspicious." "What are you trying to say, pandit?" "Now that the temple is open, it will remain so." "I will get the permission from the Collector." "If any of you object to this decision, you will be arrested!" "I don't accept this!" "SP Sir..." "the temple will remain open." "I take responsibility for this." "And if anybody objects... I will remind him of his childhood." "'l will Make him remember Milk number six!" "'" "come on!" "Hail Prithviraj Raghuvanshi!" "I haven't seen you before." "Sir, he is My friend's son." "He's from Chandni Chowk, Delhi." "name?" " Abb..." " Abhishek Bachchan!" "His name is Abhishek Bachchan." "What?" "Pandit..." "Abhishek Bachchan?" "What else should I've said?" "Abbas Ali?" "If the villagers would find out that an Abbas Ali broke the temple lock... we would be halfway across the village by now." "But why Abhishek Bachchan?" "The christening of a child doesn't Mean you name him Christ." "If Prithvirajji finds out about this lie..." "Shastri!" "Abhishek Bachchan... come with Me to the Mansion." " Shastri..." " Sir?" "isn't he the same guy who was looking for work?" "Yes, sir." "But didn't you Mention some other name?" "Well... sir..." "Who gave you this name?" "His father, sir." "Right?" "But why Abhishek Bachchan?" "Why not Sachin Tendulkar?" "Because at his birth he was taller than Tendulkar!" "I'M kidding, Prithviji." "Don't be nervous, Abhishek." "He is like family." "Tell him about your name." "Please!" "Speak." "Prithviji..." "My father and Mother were both fans of amitabh Bachchan." "Right!" "So?" "So..." "My Mother and father first Met each other at a theatre." "They were there to watch 'Deewar'." "During the interval, they saw each other." "The wall fell apart and they fell in love." "Then?" "Then..." "Then..." "Don't be shy..." "Say it." "Then..." "And then... they sneaked out to watch a film together... and the film they saw was..." " 'Chupke Chupke.'" " Yes, 'Chupke Chupke!" "'" "And the day they decided to get Married... that was the day 'KasMe Waade' released." "The day of their Marriage, 'Suhaag' was out." "And when Mother conveyed the good news to father that she was expecting... that's the day 'Parvarish' hit the theatres." "And the day I hit the world... I Mean, the day I was born was the day 'Muqaddar Ka Sikandar' released." "And that's why Prithviji, My father, just like Mr. AMitabh Bachchan... kept his son's name, I Mean, My name Abhishek Bachchan!" "It's a good thing, your parents weren't fans of AMjad Khan." "Or they would've named you Gabbar Singh!" "Your qualifications?" "JaMa lslaMiya University... opposite that is Pandit Nehru College." "I have done My BA there." "Yes, Prithviji." "AB has done his BA." "Sir, BA." "He knows two alphabets that too in reverse, BA!" "Maakhan!" "Sir?" "Give him superman's post." " superman?" " He Means supervisor." "A salary of 30,000 Rupees." "30,000?" "35,000!" "Not a rupee More!" "Hail Prithviraj!" "Thank you Prithviji." "Even though I don't have any experience, you gave Me ajob." "All due to his... 30 years of special appearances!" "He has recommended you." "Happy?" "Sir, the fact is..." "Prithviji, he wants to say that... I won't give you any reason to complain, because..." "My father would say, hard work has its own reward." "Hard work is..." "Hard work is the keyhole to saxophone!" "What did you tell Me?" "The almighty has locked both your home and your fate!" "And what did you do?" "Here you broke the lock of a religious place!" "Oh God!" "Fine, even if you broke it." "But you gave him a fake name!" "And even if you did, you used Abhishek Bachchan!" "Abhishek Bachchan!" " When the truth is revealed..." " How will the truth be revelaed?" "None of us will open our Mouth." "And nobody here knows him." "Abbas..." "Uncle said that the previous supervisor is still in the icu for telling a lie." "Abbas..." "My advice is you quit this job." "You want Me to give up ajob that pays 35,000?" "But Abbas..." "Uncle, this job is very important for Me." "How long do you expect Me to live with you?" "Once I've saved enough, I can go back to Delhi with Sania." "And start some business." "Abbas, your intention is sincere but its foundation is lies." "Sania... I'll neither be Abbas nor Abhishek Bachchan." "I'M a human being... I'll work like a Man." "And if I work with honor... neither will Allah take offence nor will lord ram." "So, ram Prasad..." "What is your experience?" "Prior to this, I have worked at 12 places." "12 places?" "Great!" "I think your compliment is doomed." "It's possible that he was fired from 12 places." "I wasn't fired, Prithviji." "In fact, I quit." "Wow, ram Prasad!" "Your ideals seem to be coated with an old song and a sweet Melody." "As you live these words, I suggest you come by the Mansion sometime." "Abhishek, what are you doing here at this hour?" "The accounts were off by a rupee." "Just a rupee." "Prithviji, My father would say... when you're gifting someone cash, a round 100 Means nothing." "It has to be, 101." "Your father is 101% right!" "Every penny discounts!" " Where is..." " Penny?" "Your father?" "He isn't alive." "I have a younger sister at home." "Sania!" "Help!" "Sania, they are beating Me up!" "You expect us to praise you?" "The dialogue is, 'l've had the salt in your house...'" "And he says, 'l've had the toothpaste in your house.'" "Well, there is salt in the toothpaste!" "No wonder you were beaten up, Vidyasagar!" "You turned an emotional scene into a comedy!" "Here, I'll show how it's done." "'Brother, is it correct to betray the one who has trusted us completely?" "'" "Go..." "I'M sure your sister is waiting for you." " Yes, go!" " Good night, Prithviji." "'Brother, when he has kept us close to his heart... is it right to play with his emotions?" "'" "Have you ever seen a real gem?" "Of course, lots of times." "The one in your ring!" "I wasn't talking about this." "Abhishek... a real gem." "Sania, you're the real gem in our play!" "No Matter how Much Vidyasagar dives into this role... he can never play a girl." "You should be the heroine!" "Me?" " Sania, please!" " No, no..." "Please!" "Me?" "No way!" "We are begging you, please be the heroine." "Please!" "Okay!" " Okay!" " Okay!" "What's wrong, Shastri?" "You look worried." "The Month of RaMzan has just begun." "According to Me, two things are certain." "Either you will be caught..." "or you will be caught!" "If we are caught we'll tell Prithviji." "What?" "That there's 'ram' in RaMzan and 'Ali' in Diwali!" "What are you looking at, Abbas?" "Ravi, I hope I didn't Make a Mistake by breaking the temple lock." "Of course not, Abbas!" "You broke the temple lock to save a child." "What could be More right?" "You remember what you had said... neither will Allah take offence, nor will lord ram." "Take a look, Abbas..." "Your honesty has triumphed over our lie." "Abhishek... tomorrow you're coming with Me to Delhi." "Radhika's vacation starts tomorrow." "My sister... it's her birthday." "We'll bring her home." "Delhi?" "Happy birthday, Radhika." "Hey... no, no!" "It's your birthday, Radhika and Make up is important!" "No!" "Please!" "Brother!" "Pineapple Cake!" "English is a very funny language, Abhishek!" "No pine, no apple, yet its pineapple!" "Brother, what did you do?" "These days a little bit of cake is applied on the face." "And I applied his face to the cake!" "Hey village landlord!" "Without any warning, all of a sudden... how can you shove My face in the cake?" "You have a point." "let's Make an announcement." "We request the people at the party to step back a few steps because... we're shoving his face in the cake once More." "come..." "What the hell, Radhika!" "Brother, who is this new goon you've brought along?" "Goon?" "Thank you very Much, Brother." "By humiliating My friends you've given Me the perfect birthday gift!" "The party is over!" "Radhika, sir's birthday gift to you." "Car for the lady!" "Radhika..." "Happy birthright to you!" "Color, dark Red Indian." "For safety, air balloon." "The plate with the hole..." "CD... 6-CD changer." "Yes!" "Central jail locking system and... on the passenger seat, a stud like Me!" " Abhishek!" " Yes?" "Take her for Merry go round!" "Yes." "Wait a Minute, Brother!" "Whose birthday is it?" "Yours." "Whose gift is it?" "Yours." "Then why will he drive the car?" "Such temper, sir." "She's taken after you." "Prithviji, it has been a while since Radhikaji left." "Hello..." "Radhika... this is Maakhan..." "What?" "Okay, alright." "The hunter searches high and low, while the prey is right at home!" "Radhika gave us the slip and is headed to Ranakpur." "But on the way to Ranakpur is Vikrant's village, Kherwada!" "I've been trying to call you but you were not answering!" "Brother, I have a flat tyre." "Why did you have to take off on your own?" "Where are you now?" "About two Miles from Kherwada." "And there's no one here to ask for help." "Stay right there!" "We're on the way." "But by the time you get here..." "Vikrant!" " Maakhan!" " Sir?" "Bring Sabu and the others to Kherwada!" " Yes, sir." " you too, Abhishek." "Prithviji, I'll come with you." "Try to understand My problem, cousin." "I have nothing against you... but how else do I take My revenge with Prithvi?" "Right from the power plant, to the landlords, the temple... he keeps getting in My way." "It's unfortunate that you are entangled in our differences." "Finally, My cousin who has always been distant, has come close to Me." "Abhishek... you can still walk away from here." "Prithviji, I'M working for you." "What good am I to you, if I can't be of use at the right time?" "Prithvi is finally here in Kherwada!" "love for a sister forced you to Make a Mistake." "My army surrounds you, Prithvi." "My army!" "Vikrant... a tiger always hunts for a flock of sheep!" "Sabu!" "I can't stoop as low as you, Vikrant." "I don't look for profit in a relationship, I care about value." "But Mark My words... if you ever repeat this Mistake... I will send you right to hell." "Now do you realize why I don't let you go out on your own?" "Though they are blood relatives, they thirst for our blood!" "Brother, given that there are so Many problems here... why don't we Move out of Ranakpur?" "Every citizen of Ranakpur is very dear to Me." "Their hopes rest with Me." "And all I know is this... you May break a relationship... but never break someone's trust." "Next time inform Me before you leave." "Sabu, set the table." "Yes, sir." "Prithviji, we'll take your leave now." "Goodbye, sir." "listen... today you proved that... not only are you honest, but you are brave too." "come and have lunch with Me." "No, Prithviji, I'M fasting... today." "Today I've decided to observe a fast." "See you." "listen..." "Yes?" "A fast on Wednesday?" "Prithviji, Tuesday or Wednesday, it Makes no difference to a Mother." "I'M observing this fast especially for My Mother." "Wait a Minute." "You said you had only a sister at home." "Now where did this Mother come from?" "You Mean, only you have a Mother?" "You think I came out of an egg?" "Prithviji, the thing is My sister was at home but My Mother returned yesterday." "Returned from where?" " Kaashi." " Kaashi." "Kaashi?" "And she is suffering from a bad cold." "So, I decided that until 'aMMi'..." "'MuMMy' gets well, I'll observe a fast everyday!" "listen..." "Even I will observe a fast for your Mother." "You can't be serious!" "You're doing such a great thing for My Mother..." "That's nothing." "tomorrow I will also come to your place." "No!" " Yes!" " Why?" "Why not!" "But why, Prithviji?" "To break the fast in your Mother's presence." "What the..." "What?" "My Mother and sister will be very happy." "I said they will be very happy." "It will Make Me happy too." "I will also be happy." "The thing is, sir has seen his Mother but never had a Mother's affection." "Maakhan!" "Got it." "See you." "Yes, Prithviji?" "I didn't say, 'listen'." "I think you're ears are ringing." "'Your eardruMs are playing drums!" "'" "Now there will be More bells ringing!" "Meet your Mother!" "How will they Meet your Mother?" "If there were a Mother." "But where is the Mother?" "Meet your Mother!" "I think, with the stress about a Mother, My father will pass away." "look!" "Don't we have a fake Mother in our plays?" "Abbas, a fake Mother." "What?" "A Mother and that too, fake?" "But where do we get a fake Mother?" "Right..." "We even get Vidyasagar to play female characters." "He May pass off as a Mother but... I won't pass off as his son." "Abbas, Sania... I have a Mother!" "There you go again!" "Enough with the dialogues." "I'M not delivering dialogues." "It's the truth." "I have a Mother!" "There are thousands mesmerized by the Magic in My eyes!" "There Might be a thousand desirable places in this world." "There are a thousand admirers of this courtesan!" "Over there, Abbas." "Your future Mother." " Her?" " Yes." "Try to drink this passion from My eyes." "What's in a heart, you can even take My life!" "Zohra, you're the chick in My roost and... I'M the rooster that's hungry for you!" "I want a Mother, Ravi." "What if she begins to dance in Prithviji's presence?" "She is an actor!" "And actors are like water." "They take shape of any Mould." "And listen to her talk, such sweet words." "Who is this new visitor in My pavilion of youth?" "Probably the scrap dealer, who likes old stuff." "You cheap good-for-nothing!" "You're the dirt of humanity, the worm from hell." "I'll show you!" "We'll get Vidyasagar to write her dialogues." "How dare you call a young Maiden an old woman?" "Wicked Man!" "You're old, your family is old, and your son is also old!" "You perverted rooster!" "worm from the sewer!" "I'll place hot coal on your wild tongue!" "You're a torn shoe!" "I'll hit you with My sandals!" "It's better to be an orphan than have a Mother like her!" " let's go." " No, think about it, Abbas." "A Mother for four Minutes or a salary of 35,000?" "Sister's responsibility or ajobless Misery?" "Mother's veil or Prithviji's belt?" "Mother!" "Tell Me quickly, what is it you want from Me?" "Actually, I'M here to Make you a Mother, Zohraji." " What?" " Yes." "In fact, I'M here to Make you a Mother." "Yes." "You too?" "Ravi said, that it's no big deal for you." "Please don't say no, Zohraji." "Only you can Make this possible." "We have come here with high hopes." "Rascals!" "Scoundrels!" "Perverts!" "shameless!" "You see a delicate blossom and you want to pluck it away!" "Perverts!" "Perverts?" "You've got it all wrong." "You Merely have to act as his Mother in front of his boss." "Explain it to her." "She thinks we are perverts." "Zohraji, it's not about nature's rule, but Money rules!" "Yes." "At least listen to My problem." "Your story is emotionally very right... but Making Me your Mother is very wrong." "In a few Minutes Prithvi will figure Me out." "Oh no, he isn't a pervert." "That's not what I Meant!" "I Mean, he will see through the lie." "And realise that I'M not the Mother because... I don't look as old as a Mother." "But... you see... you can Make Me a lover, a friend, a younger sister too." "But I aM too young for this role!" "And to be honest, now its time for My second act." "I'll leave now." "I'M the gorgeous princess." "I'M the passionate queen." "She will drop dead in two days!" "It's My curse!" "But in two hours Prithviji will be home." "What do we do?" "look for a Mother!" "How did we get trapped into this?" "Where the hell are the guys?" "What are you doing up there?" " Move it." " Get lost!" "Sir is here." "What do we do now?" "My God!" "Abhishek!" "Wait." "let them keep knocking." "They'll get tired of knocking and leave." "Abhishek?" "Shastri!" "Yes, sir!" "If you weren't My father... I'd have torn your dhoti and tied it around your neck." "Move it!" "You think you are batman?" "Prithviji... hello." "Please come in." "'HoMe swine home.'" "Shastri?" "Sir." "You've killed enough lizards, Shastri." "time you got down." "Mother isn't here." "Yes." "He is so sincere." "He observed his fast and even came here to break it." "Right, Prithviji?" "Oh no!" "Mother isn't here." "It's true." " Mother isn't here." " Mother isn't here?" "She has gone to the temple." "I tried to Make her wait, Prithviji." "But even with her bad cold, she went to offer her prayers." "She May take a while to get back." "Why don't we break the fast and eat?" "Yes." " let Me set the table." " come on." "listen... how can you even say that?" "We've observed this fast for Mother." "let her come back, then we will eat." "Sir... it's taken too long for Mother to return." "You see, Prithviji... once My Mother begins to chant 'Hari OM'... she doesn't feel the need to get back 'home'." "So, let's eat?" "No." "Why don't we go to the temple?" "Sit!" "I Mean, you Must be tired sitting there." "Yes." "Right, Prithviji?" "So let's go... to the temple." "That's not necessary." "Mother is here." "Mother!" "Prithviji, Mother is here." "Uncle, Mother is here." "Ravi, Mother is here." "Mother!" "Mother is here!" "Mother is here!" "Tell it to the village that Mother is here." "Prithviji, this is My Mother." "This is a charm of My beautiful hair." "Prithviji, please have a seat." "Why are you standing?" "I thank you very Much for giving My son ajob." "The lord is great!" "Very nice." "Such holy thoughts." "A holy family, a holy atmosphere." "So how holy are you?" "Sir!" "I Mean, how's your health?" "What can I say about My health." "In fact My beauty... that gave in to My old age, is what keeps Me going on." "It's a license." "And there's this rascal." "Every time I call, he comes to Me." "Son!" "Abhishek." "What is it Mother?" "Tell Me." "I didn't call out." "That was from behind." "Son!" "Your Mother is here." "Your Mother is here." "Why are you staring?" "let Me bless you." "Mother!" "listen..." "Who is she?" "Mother." "She is also your Mother?" "Sir, she isn't the Mother." "She isn't the Mother?" "Very true." "She isn't the Mother." "She is My nanny." "Nanny?" "Yes, nanny." "She is My Mother." "She is the nanny." "She gave birth to Me." "She helped Me come into this world." "Yes, Prithviji." "If she is the sea of love, then she is the river." "And he came into this world with her help." "Right?" "You see that, Maakhan?" "This is what I call values." "He loves both of them equally." "Yes, Prithviji." "Ever since he was a kid, he has been naughty." "You saw how when the nanny called him, he looked at Me." " Son!" " Yes, Mother." "I didn't speak." " Oh, Yes nanny." " Me neither." " No?" " No!" "Your Mother is here." "let Me bless you." "listen..." "Before you even say anything... I'd like to say something." "Today is an amazing day!" "Everyone is perplexed." "Red light and nowhere to go!" "How come another Mother?" "Prithviji... the fact is... she is My Mother... she is My nanny and... she is My..." "'Maid-Mother'!" "'Maid-Mother'?" "Yes." "House Maid." "But it's impolite to just say 'Maid'." "Therefore..." "'Maid-Mother'." "Wow, Abhishek Bachchan!" "Just as righteous your family is... your character is just as righteous." "You are so trustworthy that even at night... 'twelve o'clock at night you do one night stand for Me!" "' let's break the fast with all three Mothers!" "Okay." "Ravi..." "I didn't find Mother." "I tried a lot but I..." "Kailash!" "When will these seizures end!" "Prithviji, remember Shastri was saying... "Mother isn't here."" "His Mother isn't here." "She went away when he was a kid and since then he gets these seizures." "Snap out of it, Kailash!" "See who is in front of you!" "Idiot!" "The games destiny plays..." "He has no Mother and I have three Mothers!" "I'M really tired." "This Mother, that Mother..." "There you are?" "Where were you?" "look, Mother is also back from the temple." "Prithviji, she isn't My Mother." "She is My sister..." "Sania." "Bachchan!" "Sania Bachchan." "Right!" "I just remembered something." "Ghost!" "Brilliant!" "One lie to cover another lie." "And another lie on top of another..." "Of course." "You've got to balance the lies, Shastri." " Perfect, isn't it?" " You will be thrashed!" "Of course we will!" "Move it." "What's this, Zohraji?" "You refused to help us." "Then how did you land up here?" "His story touched a chord in Me." "And I thought... it's no Mean feat for a young actor to play an old character!" "Right, elder sister?" "What are you thinking, Abbas?" "Prithviji was here to break the fast with us... then why did he leave in a hurry?" "Ghost!" "She is a ghost." "She is not a ghost... but Abhishek's sister, Sania." "And she was Apeksa." "My Apeksa!" "Inspector, will it take long?" "Well, the Eid prayers will be done in another five Minutes." "No problem, there's no hurry." "Sir... lt was a good thing to Meet the collector of AMergadh." "When the power plant is set up in Ranakpur... it will be a delight to watch Vikrant's face." "The power will switch off his face." "Sir!" "Abhishek Bachchan!" "is he shooting in AMergadh?" "Not him!" "Abhishek Bachchan from Ranakpur." "Over there!" "Sania, this was great." "It's a always good to enjoy the Eid sweets." "Prithviji... here?" "I had told you... 'you May break a relationship... but never break someone's trust.'" "I saw you at AMergadh." "You were celebrating Eid with the people there." "What is the truth?" "Answer Me!" "You saw Me at AMergadh... I'M dead." "And you want an answer." "Ravi, will you answer?" "But what will you say..." "Even in school you never answered the questions correctly." "I have an answer, Prithviji." "Of course!" "The person you saw was Me..." "yet it wasn't Me." "'lt was you but it wasn't you...' Huh?" "He was My identical brother, Abbas." "Abbas?" "Ravi, why are you going back there?" "Yes, Prithviji." "Abhishek has been having a hard time because of his identical brother." "Since childhood." "And I know..." "Why don't you tell?" "You know better since you're his sister." "He would steal the Mango, and Abhishek would get beaten up." "He would get bit by a dog and Abhishek would have to take an injection." "We are carbon copies, Prithviji." "Except for the Moustache." "I'M sure you noticed." "I keep a Moustache, while he doesn't." "I'M sure you noticed, Maakhan." "Except for the Moustache, they look the same." "like 'ram and ShyaM'." "like 'Seeta and Geeta'." "And similarly, Abbas Ali and Abhishek Bachchan." "Prithviji... are you doubting My integrity?" "Oh no, Abhishek." "You are My boy..." "'You are My sunflower.'" "Wait a Minute!" "How can Abhishek Bachchan's brother be Abbas Ali?" "How?" "How?" "How?" "Ravi!" "The warrior knows the truth... now what can I say?" "Exactly!" "You're so right." "What can you say and how can you reveal that..." "Abbas isn't just your identical brother... he is also an illegitimate brother!" "What?" "lllegitiMate?" "Yes!" "Yes!" "Yes!" "What are you staring at?" "Even you know the truth." "Tell them the story." " What story?" " the story of illegitimate Abbas." "Start!" "Once his 'Married' father got ajob at a construction site." "There a girl, by the name JaMila, would carry bricks." "Father would break the rocks and she'd carry bricks." "She carried bricks, father broke rocks." "And then a rock fell upon his father's sensibility." "He decided to counter JaMila's bricks with his rocks!" "And they went behind the rocks." "Where they Made love!" "What happened then?" "Then one day, nine Months later, at night..." " Day or night?" " Both!" "The day brought Abhishek into world and... the same night, Abbas was born." "Where is Abbas' Mother?" "Where is Mother?" "She isn't alive." "And that's the reason Abbas lives with us." "Abhishek has taken both My and Abbas' responsibility upon himself." "What does he do?" "Nothing at all." "He's a dancer." "Dancer!" "Prithviji, he is a high class classical dancer." "is that so?" "I'd like to Meet him." "Prithviji, he can't be of any use to you." "You are like a warrior... while he..." "Then he is definitely of use to Me!" "What?" "!" "You won't get it!" "Tell him to Meet Me and he'll get ajob." "Prithviji... why are you doing all of this?" "I have to reduce some of the burden from your head, Abhishek." "We aren't like a boss and an employee." "Your Mother is My Mother." "Your brother is My brother." " Your sister..." " Sir!" "let's go, Maakhan!" "Idiots!" "Scoundrels!" "My father broke rocks?" "My father Made love to another woman?" "And you?" "What did you whisper in Prithviji's ear?" "What?" "!" "How can I Meet him as Abbas?" "Don't you worry!" "I will create such a fabulous Abbas out of you... that Prithviji will never figure it out." "Trust Me!" "If this battery doesn't work, then use the other one." "You fool!" "What are you looking at?" "Carry on!" "Abhishek Bachchan?" "Hey crazy fans, guess who I aM... I've come from afar, who am I?" "Abbas?" "But Prithviji... I thought you were a real Man... but you are a blotch on Mankind!" "Shut up!" "He isn't Prithvi... I aM." "Greetings." "Abbas... why haven't you kept a Moustache?" "Because I never got one!" "Why not?" "Because I'M More like My Mother." "Anyway, tell Me, why did you ask Me to come here?" "Your brother said that you are a good dancer." "For fun, sir." "Fun." "Abhishek, what's this?" "Not Abhishek, but his brother, Abbas." "One's a 'Man', the other a 'dancer'." "Radhika... he will be your dance instructor from tomorrow." "What?" "I've taken the onus to help you." "But I can't come here." "In that case, you can't leave this place." "All day I look after My sick Mother." "Then you come here at night." "I will not come!" "Fine!" "lock him up and call Abhishek!" "I will come." "Nine o'clock." "listen..." "Brother, why don't you check... if he even knows to dance or is Merely faking it..." "She is right!" "let Me see your talent." " Maakhan!" " Sir!" "Music!" "Dance!" "Pappu!" "Pappu control!" "Abbas!" "Abbas, stop!" "Enog is enog!" "Starting tomorrow, you can teach Radhika dancing." "Because a fish out of water... 'fish and chips without water'... is like dancing in the dark... 'disco dancer without electric Meter'!" "listen, Hari... there's an easy way to go from fat to 'fit-fat'." " you only need to let go of three things." " What's that, sir?" "Breakfast, lunch and dinner!" "Sir, why did you give Abbas ajob?" "Shastri... it's not often that you Meet such 'blue-coated' people." "'Blue-coated'?" "'Out of the blues!" "'" "Oh no, sir." "He is useless." " But He is of use to Me." " Sir!" "I Mean, he will be Radhika's dance instructor." "My sister will be in safe hands." "Abbas, you were brilliant." "If the record company was there... they would have launched a remix album of your performance!" "And like Me, even you would be world famous here in Ranakpur." "Tell Me something... your father..." "Father?" "Shastri!" "Oh!" "He did help Me with ajob but where?" "I Mean, with that Mountain of a warrior!" "Not just a warrior..." "wild buffalo!" " Forget it." " How can I Forget it?" "'Hard work is the keyhole to saxophone'?" "Saxophone?" "He can lift a 100 kilos but... he doesn't have an ounce of intelligence." "If he had, in a Minute he would've realized that... I aM Abhishek Bachchan and also Abbas Ali." " Why are you saying all of that?" " What's wrong with you?" "Great!" "You really are good at staging acts." "I came here to tell you to stop your brother from coming to My place." "But now I will stop My brother... stop him from trusting frauds like you!" "He's very simple and naive too... and you are taking advantage of that fact." "I'M going... to tell him the truth." "Radhika... you May tell your brother the truth." "But at least listen to why we had to lie." "Radhika, a Man doesn't fulfill his life Merely by living it." "He fulfills it by taking care of the responsibilities of his family." "Abbas had some dreams for Me." "But our family property in Delhi was snatched away from us illegally." "Abbas lost his job." "Uncle Shastri brought us here to Ranakpur." "And to save a child from drowning, Abbas broke the temple lock." "And to save the situation... I said Abbas Ali's name is Abhishek Bachchan." "But when Prithviji gave Abbas such a good job... our lie didn't seem that wrong." "Radhika, nobody Makes a Mistake..." "Mistakes happen." "What you've said is right." "If you want to tell Prithviji the truth, please go ahead." "You know My brother very well!" "If he finds out the truth... he will break all of you to pieces." "It's because of this fear that we couldn't confess." "Radhika... now you May do as you wish." "listen..." "You May start teaching Me dance tomorrow." "Goodbye." "Ghost!" "Ghosts are a bundle of lies." "She is Abhishek's sister, Sania Bachchan." "Prithviji, I'M glad you are here." "Wonder where Ravi and his friends are." "If you don't Mind, will you rehearse with Me?" "I don't have any experience." "Your eyes say it all." "You only have to deliver these four lines." "And then it's My dialogue." "I can't deliver... I Mean, say these lines." "listen... I know to say, 'listen'." "Excellent!" "So look at Me and say these lines." "Okay." "Start." "listen to what I have to say!" "Goodness gracious!" "Are you admitting your love or Making a war declaration." "Take it easy." "lis...ten..." "I... have..." "to... say... some... thing..." "Now it seems like you are a toy that has been wound up!" "let it come from your heart, okay?" "Start!" "listen... listen to Me... at least listen to Me... listen, 'l say to something have...'" "Why don't you listen..." "Enough!" "You can't do it!" "The character is admitting that he is in love..." "Prithviji, you have to feel every word, not Merely rattle it!" "But you... never Mind!" "You can't do this." "listen... there's something I have to say." "Don't shoot arrows from those eyes..." "Don't take My life, My love..." "Should then My soul leave My body..." "Hail Prithviji!" "Hurray!" "Hail Prithviji!" "Hurray!" "Prithviji, unbelievable!" "I have a few words for you..." "'You carried weights and now your words have weight!" "'" "Wow!" "'There's a spark of romance in this action hero!" "'" "Wow!" "Thanks for the 'coMplan boy'." "Prithviji, I have a small request." "We have a heroine for our play, why don't you play the hero?" "Oh no, no, no!" "This is not My cup of 'lassi'." "No, sir!" "It's a request!" "Please!" "listen, I won't be able to do this." "But... I could produce your play." "Make it grand!" "That's amazing!" "You have My support." "Hail Prithviji!" "Hurray!" "We got a producer!" "Wow, Abhishek!" "You've noted every penny." "You are a 'Mind blow dryer'!" "Maakhan, a real gem!" "Yes sir... no sir..." "Radhika, what are you watching?" "GolMaal." "I lied to you hence "no" sir." "Shut up!" "I saw you in the stadium... I was shocked to see you like that." "With that Moustache you look so different." "Yes I'M doing a double role... of twin brothers..." "One has a Moustache and the other doesn't." "It's not your fault." " What do you Mean?" " Don't get so worked up!" "My father used to say..." "What is it your father said?" "Sir, My father said..." "'With a Million bricks of hard work, Man builds his home.'" "Sir." "Priceless words, My dear!" "Just like your father, you should break it all brick by brick!" "Sir?" "What are you trying to say?" "The one you saw was not RaMprasad..." "He was laxManprasad Dhashrathprasad SharMa..." "My identical twin brother." "Sir, please come." "Where?" "come with Me... I want to show you something." "Please come." "See." "I have a Moustache, he doesn't." "GolMaal." "I've seen it Many times." "I'M sure you remember the story." "Yes, AMol Palekar spins a web of lies about a twin brother and... I hope he isn't spinning a similar web of lies around you." "You are My boss, if you want to sack Me, please go ahead." "Me?" "Yes." "But why would AMol Palekar lie to Me?" "Not AMol Palekar, Abhishek Bachchan!" "Have you lost it?" "You're equating a film to real life!" "No, I'M equating real life to a film." "But these things happen in real life." "Isn't Sania identical to Apeksa?" "You think a obedient person like Abhishek will lie?" "You think his pious Mother will lie?" "Have you ever seen such a well-cultured family?" "I haven't and that's why I think so!" "'When the first is incoming, the other is outgoing.'" "'And when the other is outgoing, the first is incoming.'" "There's never been a cross connection in this roaming facility!" "If these 'two sim cards' actually belong to 'one phone' then... the Prithviraj who is brave and strong and revered... would have been fooled by a nobody!" "Think about what that will do to your image." "Prithviji, My name is Irfan Pathan... and this is My identical brother Mahendra Singh Dhoni!" "come on." "Abhishek..." "We need to discuss Abbas' salary." "Can he come now?" "Now?" "Now, he is looking after Mother." "I'll send him as soon as I get home." "Why did you lock the door?" "Because this lock will unlock the other lock." "It's a necessity, sir." "'Necessity is the Mother of Discovery channel!" "'" "Radhika, why did Maakhan lock the door?" "Because he's taken Prithvi to see who are not there." "Who?" "Abbas and Mother!" "Please go hurry up." "See sir... neither is he here, nor is his Mother!" "They've vanished into thin air!" "They aren't here... there's no use looking for them." "Prithviji, what brings you here?" "I was passing by and saw the house and thought..." "You thought of watching the road from the house?" "Hello, Mother." "Hello, Mother." "She isn't answering nor looking eye to eye." "What's the Matter?" "Because she just shut her eyes, blind Man!" "So, shhhh!" "How is her health now?" "As usual, just lying around." "I... I'd like to say something, if you don't Mind." "It's not good to visit someone so often." "It lowers ones respect." "let's go, Maakhan." "Sir!" "She has hairy legs, how?" "How does Mother have hairy legs?" "You think instead of hair on her legs... there should be legs in her hair?" "Prithviji, tell Me something." "You think at this old age, My Mother should visit a beauty parlor?" "It's My time to get Manicured, pedicured, and waxed." "Anyway, he has always been a scoundrel." "What?" " you too?" " What?" "Unbelievable!" "How could you employ someone who thinks about My Mother's hairy legs?" "They're gone!" "Gone?" "Wow!" "Abbas, that was close!" "Oh no!" "What happened?" "Prithviji has left for the Mansion." "So?" "So?" "Abbas is here!" "But Abhishek Bachchan isn't there!" "Oh God!" "Now we're dead!" "You were checking out Mother's hair?" "Prithviji, Abbas called and told Me." "I will..." "Abhishek..." "Your brother has already slapped him." "Anyway, he has always been a scoundrel." "Huh?" "But you too?" " What?" " Unbelievable!" "You doubted Me?" "Me?" "Oh no, Abhishek!" "Don't get emotional, 'pest control yourself!" "'" "You're like a younger brother, you're My own!" "No, Prithviji." "I'M resigning!" "That's fine... but don't quit your job because of your anger." "Prithviji!" "Don't you realize which is the bone that supports your spine and... which is the bone that will get stuck in your throat?" "Maakhan!" " sir." " Say it..." "Say it... say that they are one." "Say that after we left, someone opened the lock... and he got there before us... took off his Moustache and began Massaging his Mother's legs." " No, sir." " Say it!" "And say that before we could get here, he Made it and... who had opened the lock before, locked him in again and... he put on a fake Moustache!" " No, sir." " Say it!" "No, sir." "No, sir." "He is fake?" "No, sir." "Forgive Me." " this is fake?" " No, sir." "Pull it!" "No, sir." " Pull it, I say." " No, sir." "Forgive Me!" "Try to pull it." "Pull it!" "Sir!" "You're pulling it!" "You're still trying to pull it!" "You humiliated Me in front of Abhishek." "'My eyes have fallen from My face!" "' lf his Mother learns about this, she will be hurt." "Mother!" "Where?" "Over there." "'You found time to confess.'" "'But this life proved too short for Me to sin.' 'l will land at your door, over and over again.' 'l will land at your door, over and over again.'" "'Ring the door bell and run away like hell.'" "That's a load of crap, old woman!" "Zohra, till when will you torture us with your sorrow?" "With cameraman Yogesh, Rajan Chaurasiya, Aajtak." "Zohra, does that Mean I'M the father of your child?" "You should grow up for that, bald Man!" "So, how did it happen?" "Well..." "How did the Miracle happen?" "Well..." "How did it happen?" "Well..." " How did the Miracle happen!" " Get lost!" "Oh God, Make this problem go away!" "Greetings, Mother!" "Greetings." "Who are you?" "And who are you looking for?" "Great!" "Signs of danger and the chameleon changes color!" "Don't you recognize Prithviraj Raghuvanshi?" "Do I know you?" "That's up to you." "But now I know you very well." "Yes!" "A saintly widow and a seductive vamp!" "Widow?" "I guess you Met My twin, MadhuMati." "That's not Me." "I also have two identical nephews..." "Abhishek and Abbas." "My sister and I also had identical Mothers... leelavati and Nanavati." "is it a family or an identical children producing factory?" "You foul-Mouthed good-for-nothing, I'll show you!" "What?" "Sir..." "Sir, he even looks like a scoundrel." "Huh?" "But you too?" " What?" " Unbelievable!" "Couldn't you tell the difference between..." "'Saintly MadhuMati' and 'Seductive Zohra'?" "Forgive Me, I was Misled by the poster." "'Zohra, The lnfaMous'" "Only for you, darling!" "It's a song, sir." "That reminds Me, please convey My regards to Madhu." "And also tell her that Zohra Misses her." "Wait a Minute, sir." "How can MadhuMati's sister be Zohra?" "Maakhan, it won't be nice to hear... the 'rock and brick' story from a lady." "I believe Abbas has taken after her." "Sir... don't you think we should convey..." "Zohra's regards to MadhuMati right now?" "At her house?" "Oh no, she Must be asleep." "But Sania will be awake." "let's go!" "Prithviji's hand was almost here." "You were saved by a whisker, Abbas." "Actually, I was saved." "With My hairy legs exposed, I thought all of us would be exposed." " Abhishek." " Who is it?" "Abhishek." " Your Moustache!" " They are here." "Put on your Moustache." "Two double centuries!" "Prithviji, didn't I tell you that... 'lt's not good to visit someone so often." "It lowers their respect.'" "Oh no!" "We are here to see your Mother." "We need to talk to her." "Well..." "She is taking a bath." " let's come back some other time, Maakhan..." " Sir, the Message... and it doesn't take long for a bath." "Sania is also here... to get us coffee." "Sania, May we come in?" "Ravi, Sania... in the last act of our play, the liars should be severely punished." "'Honesty is the best Mutual policy!" "'" " Wow!" " That reminds Me... where is Abhishek Bachchan?" "same thing... temple... bell... old fashioned guy." "Mark My words... some day this drama will fall apart and the truth will be out." "Sir has placed his trust in you and you are carrying on with the lies." " When Sir..." " Sir?" "Shastri... I know everything about their drama." "The Aflatoon drama company is practicing very sincerely." "Of course!" "Sania too." "I've invested at the right place." "They won't break My trust." "That's very kind of you!" "Hail Prithviji!" " lt's too late now, we'll leave." " Yes please." "Sir..." "Mother?" "By now even the pipes would have run out of water!" "We could have some More coffee." "Sania, you can get us coffee, right?" "Hey!" "Why are you crying?" "Actually..." "we are out of coffee." "Now what can we get for you?" "Out of coffee?" "No problem." "Tea will do." "The fatso wants tea." "Give him tea and give Me some poison!" "What do we do now?" "We're doomed!" "Sania dear, who's out there?" "Hello Prithviji." "Mother..." "Mother is here!" "There is no tea, but Mother is here." "Wait a Minute!" "Shastriji just stepped out the bathroom over there and..." "Mother also came out from there?" "How?" "How?" "When you can have two identical sons at home... can you not have identical bathrooms?" "My sister, Zohra, called Me." "Zohra?" "You Misbehaved with her?" "You actually look like a scoundrel." "Huh?" " And you too..." " What?" "Unbelievable!" "You believed his words?" "I aM very sorry." "Oh no, Prithviji." "We'll leave now." "Oh no, Prithviji." "Prithviji..." "Zohraji, what brings you here?" "And your sister, Zohra?" "I'll explain everything." "No problem, Prithviji, it will be done." "We'll have to set the boundary line of the..." "Deteron power plant further by 150 yards." "Prithviji, I'd appreciate... if I could get the documents regarding the land and the plant." "Yes, yes." " Shastriji..." " Yes, sir." "Give Akhileshji all that he wants." "Yes." "'ASAP-QRS!" "'" "Yes, sir." "Got it." "And out in the distance, Prithviji, the greenery..." "Forget the greenery, look what's blooming out there!" "Open free show!" "Vinay!" "'DhiM Phataphat Jhingdi Popo!" "'" "DhiM Phataphat Jhingdi Popo?" "Yes." "I Mean, two people in love under ajasMine tree." "let Me take a look..." "Under a jasmine tree..." "Oh no!" "Shastri..." "What did he see?" "Sir!" "Sir, look!" "Yes look!" "Ranakpur is on the road to progress." "Prithviji, take a look." "'DhiM Phataphat Jhingdi Popo!" "'" "Brother... I..." "I really like him." "And before you lecture Me about our family honor and social status..." "Those things don't Matter... what Matters is the 'in-between'." "In between?" "He always stands on one side." "Radhika, you cannot be with him because he is..." "He is?" "What, brother!" "Which era are you living in?" "People of My generation don't Mind such things." "I Mean, look at out superstars, cricketers... even our local collector is one." "What?" "What are you talking about?" "Are you alright?" "They are the same." "Shahrukh Khan, Zaheer Khan, Javed Akhtar, salman Khan... even our ex-President, Abdul KalaaM Azaad too!" "I didn't know that." "Well now you do!" "Decide for yourself!" "If people practicing the same faith as..." "Abbas can be in every field of life then why not in My life?" "Oh no!" "I'M not talking about faith... I'M talking about their persuasion..." "By persuasion even you are the same." "Honest and just." " But..." " Please, brother." "Please!" "She won't get it!" "I guess I'll have to tell Abbas Myself!" "Prithviji, you called for Me." "Abhishek!" "Tell your brother to stay away from My sister, otherwise... I respect you and your Mother, otherwise..." "Tell your brother... I'll give him a dog's death!" "'Brother-in-law will die tommy's death!" "'" "I will talk to him, Prithviji." "I'll leave now." "You didn't get it, but he will explain it to him." "If he still doesn't get it straight... I'll Make sure to lay him straight for good!" "Over!" "It's all over!" "Your brother gave himself two names." "Now Prithviji will Make two separate pieces of him." "This was bound to happen to you, Abbas." "As you sow, so shall you reap!" "What are you talking about, Ravi?" "You knew that Prithvi hates lies." "You fear him, yet its one lie after another." "What are you trying to say?" "You lie about each and everything and... now you are lecturing Me about being truthful?" "You started it with the fake Abhishek Bachchan name!" "But you came up with the reason how you got that name." "You fake Mother was your idea." "And the 'nanny' and 'Maid Mother' concept was yours!" "You got rid of My Moustache!" "You conned Prithviji with the Moustache idea." "You also used this dirty, fake Moustache." "The fact is... now I aM scared as hell!" "Abbas... I agree that I aM responsible for your lies." "And I also know that now I will die a dog's death!" "Father!" "Father?" "Where is father?" "I'M calling out to you!" "Please save this little boy of yours." "I love you." "Get lost!" "What love!" "Please save Me, father." "Keep Me safe in your arms." "Abbas, My friend... only you can Make things right." "And you will have to do it!" "Radhika?" "I'M going to Raajgadh." "For the country fair?" "My brother has ordered Me to break up with you." "But I want to be with you for the rest of My life!" "That's why I'M giving you two days." "I want you to solve all the problems with My brother... and then come to Raajgadh to get Me." "I will send you the address." " But you only have two days, otherwise..." " Wait a Minute!" "What's with the time limit..." "this attitude?" "What have I done?" "'Bundle of lies!" "'" "from dawn to dusk, you keep spinning My brother in a bundle of lies!" "Abhishek Bachchan, I want Abbas back in two days!" "Bye." "Unbelievable!" "The brother wants Abbas out of the way and... the sister wants Abhishek Bachchan out of the way!" "Both of them have turned Me into a drum." "Abbas, I'M leaving." "Radhika, stop behaving like a child and come back." "I will do as I have said." "In fact, I Made it to the bus." "Radhika, don't be foolish." "If your brother finds out..." "Abbas at home?" "No." "So My suspicion was right." "Suspicion?" "Radhika is Missing since Morning and Abbas is not here either." "Your brother has run away with My sister." "How can you say that, Prithviji?" "I aM here... I Mean, as long as I'M here..." "My brother will never take such a step." "Then where is Radhika?" "Cousin, you're looking for Radhika, right?" "She is going to Raajgadh by bus." "But the DharaMpur bus depot is on the way." "And Kherwada is ten Minutes away from DharaMpur." "Whereas Ranakpur is 30 Minutes away." "I'd like to see how you'll cover... a distance of 30 Minutes in ten Minutes!" "The passengers can freshen up, the bus will halt here for some time." "come on..." "Everybody out of the bus, now!" "Move it!" "Get down!" "Everybody out!" "Cousin Prithvi..." "Get down." "Abbas!" "Prithviji!" "Bhawani start the bus." "Brother!" "leave..." "Prithviji..." "Hold on, Prithviji." "You can't fight blood with blood!" "come on." "I warned you never to step out of Ranakpur." "But you were running away from home, from Ranakpur." "And for whom?" "That idiot who abandoned you?" "What do you think, Abhishek?" "Did I say something wrong?" "You are absolutely right, Prithviji." "Radhika, a real Man doesn't run away from problems... but he faces them head on." " Right, Prithviji?" " Yes." "A real Man doesn't care about his own life but... puts his own life in danger for his loved ones." " Right, Prithviji?" " Yes." "You should look for a life partner who will protect you every Minute... just like I did." " Right, Prithviji?" " Yes." " Abhishek?" " Yes, Prithviji?" "You are absolutely right!" "Searching the whole town and finding him right beside." "'Boy under armpit and hypercity noise pollution!" "'" "What?" "Abhishek, do you like Radhika?" " do I like Radhika?" " Wow!" "You like Radhika!" "Radhika, do you like Abhishek?" "Yes, brother." "You opened My eyes!" "A real Man doesn't run away from problems..." "A real Man doesn't care about his own life but..." ""puts his own life in I'M willing to Marry him." "Oh no!" "I can't get Married." "Why not?" "It's a personal problem." "Don't worry, Medicines are available these days." " And there are clinics everywhere." " Prithviji!" "I can't get Married because... when My sister is unmarried, how can I get Married?" "You also have an unmarried sister." "Until she doesn't get Married, how can you get Married?" "Actually, I'M here to talk about bringing our families closer." " But Prithviji..." " Abhishek..." "When elders are talking, the young shouldn't interrupt." "'When elder get cozy, younger don't put nosy.'" "Right!" "So, what do you have to say about Marriage?" "I never thought about it." "I understand." "looking after the kids and offering prayers to God... I don't think you had time to... think about Sania and My Marriage." "If I have your permission..." "permission?" "permission from MadhuMati?" "To Marry an honest and just Man like you, I'd jump... right into the preparations." "What do you think you're saying?" "Silence!" "Didn't you hear..." "When elder get cozy, younger don't put nosy." "Prithviji, I think you should get Married to Sania at the earliest." "You better decide on the wedding date soon." "Wow!" "Thank you." "listen... now two brother's will be busy preparing their sister's Marriage." "'A brother in need is a sister indeed.'" "Why did you have to agree to the Marriage?" "Idiot, how can anyone decline to such a Match?" "The Minute Prithviji realizes that... he is not Marrying Sania Bachchan but Sania Ali... he will shoot all of us!" "Absolutely!" "Finally!" "Finally, you spoke the truth." "Prithviji will shoot all of us." "We are doomed!" "Why don't you Make Sania wear a Moustache... and tell Prithviji that he had seen Sania's sister, Dhaniya!" "You can change you get-up and say you are Govinda!" "And I will say, I'M not Shastri... but ajailor from the British era!" "Ha ha!" "How Much are you eating, Hari?" "You should save some for the country!" "When you go back to your village... they'll think of you as another village." "Sir..." "Saniaji." "Prithviji..." "Sorry, but I can't Marry you." "No girl will reject your proposal but... I can't Marry you for a personal reason." "And... I had a personal reason for wanting to Marry you." "She is..." "Even I was shocked when I first saw you." "She is Apeksa." "I loved her a lot." "Four years ago she passed away in an accident." "She is no longer alive and all I have is this picture." "Radhika doesn't know about her." "After Apeksa passed away... I had no reason to live." "I devoted Myself to the progress of Ranakpur." "And when I saw you I thought Apeksa was back." "I forgot that you aren't Apeksa but Sania Bachchan." "'Bloody fool got emotional.'" "Please forgive Me... without asking you I came to your place with the proposal." "Anyway, it happens." "Happens only in India." "But I aM happy that..." "My sister is getting Married into your family." "Abhishek is a good boy." "Strong, honest." "I aM happy." "I aM very happy." "I aM very happy." "Abhishek..." "See you tomorrow." "You better remember to wake up!" "let's go." "What's the Matter?" "Abbas, we Made a big Mistake." "Very big!" "We are cheating the very person who has helped us in every way." "Every possible way." "He is so honest and down-to-earth." "When he figures that Abbas and Abhishek are one and the same..." "You had said... if I work with honor..." ""neither will Allah take offence, nor will lord ram."" "But lying to such a nice person... will hurt Gods of every faith in this world!" "Sir..." "Have you lost it?" "Yes, sir!" "All because of happiness." "Sir, please deliver Gabbar Singh's legendary dialogue." "What?" "Please!" "How Many were there?" "Not two, but one!" "What?" "I Mean, there's only one!" "Sania is right." "I will go and confess everything to Prithviji." "What?" "Have you lost your Mind?" "Shastriji." "Prithviji has called the entire family to the Mansion." "welcome Abhishek Bachchan." "Greetings Mother." "Greetings." "Prithviji, why did you call us here?" "Well, I..." "Prithviji, I'M glad you asked all of us to come here." "Prithviji, we have something to..." "But before that, let Me tell you that... I have Made some changes in the play." "Please take your seat." "I want to see everyone's expressions." "'l wanting to watchMan all your express highways.'" "Interesting!" "Now this Muscle-brain will Make changes in the play!" "This always happens in our field." "Once a person becomes a producer... he forces himself into the creative aspect too!" "Such waves, such seasons, such times..." "Once there was a King and his Minister..." "He was Janakpur's ruler, King Rishiraj Raghuvanshi." "And his loyal confidante, General Bol Bachchan." "Bol Bachchan... you've been looking after the royal treasury for Many Months now." "Rishirajji, My father would say..." ""Salt increases blood pressure, and" "Brilliant!" "Brilliant!" "When the son is so good, how will the Mother be?" "Mother..." "The lord is great." "Pray to the lord." "Hari OM!" "Greetings Rishirajji." "Greetings Mother." "And this is Janakpur's Mad Man, Uncle Mistri." "Mother isn't here." "One day the King took a ride around his kingdom..." "And he saw his Minister..." "People were celebrating Eid..." "What a sight it was..." "Once there was a King and his Minister... I'M not Bol Bachchan... I'M his dancer brother, Abba Dabba Jabba." "And My Mother also has an identical sister, Mohra." "Take a look." "Greetings." "I'M a delicate bud, let Me bloom." "I'M A R RahMan's new song, let Me grow on you!" "Mother isn't here." "Today was unbelievable, wasn't it, Sabu?" "Father!" "Rishirajji, My father would say..." "The lord is great." "Hari OM!" "Starting today I'll observe a fast everyday." "This old age is a gift from My youth, Rishirajji." "And so the King was fooled..." "All of you fooled Me." "And I got fooled!" "I believed every lie to be the truth." "I'M Muscle-brain, so... I don't think with My Mind, but with My heart." "I respected the uncle as an uncle... I considered Mother as a Mother... I kept all of you close to My heart... because I don't think with My Mind... but not anymore." "You've trampled My heart, ripped it, broken it." "And now the Mighty Prithviraj Raghuvanshi... will break your bones!" "'l will put the last nail polish in the coffin!" "'" "Because..." "Now I've lost it!" "Wait a Minute!" "Actually, this has been a Miscalculation..." "Misconception, Misapplication..." "Misapprehension, Misinterpretation." "This is supercalifragilisti cexpialidocious!" "Radhika!" "Abbas, Prithviji is here!" "What will happen now?" "Prithviji won't spare us!" "Abbas!" "Faster!" "Faster!" "Step on it!" "Prithviji is back again." "He is right behind us." "Stop the car!" "let's run for our lives!" "Father!" "Be careful!" "Abbas!" "Brother!" "Sir!" " Prithviji!" " Brother!" "Sir!" " someone help sir." " Help!" "Abbas, all this is only because of you." "listen Abbas..." "you will save My boss." " Me?" " Yes!" "Have you seen how deep the ravine is?" "The More I climb down, the More I'll be closer to heaven." " Abbas!" " Yes?" "All that Prithviji is going through is only because of your lie." "When did it change from 'our lie' to 'My lie'?" "I don't want to talk about it." "If you don't save him, I will never see your face again." " Abbas!" " Yes?" "I'M Prithviraj Raghuvanshi's sister." "So?" "If you don't save him, I will never see your face again." " Abbas!" " Yes?" "And I will support My elders, My elder sisters." "Huh?" "Even I will never see your face again." "I will never see your face again." "Even I will never see your face again!" "Great!" "On that point all five of you agree!" "And I'M between the devil and the deep blue sea!" "What do you think?" "That you will tell Me and I will go to help?" "No way!" "Who do you think I aM?" "You think I'M the Man who doesn't get hurt?" "You think I'M a superhero with a cape?" "I'M brave-heart!" "But with this brave-heart, I also have a Mind." "And My Mind says that I..." "mummy!" "Prithviji..." "Prithviji help!" "Pr..." "Pr..." "Prithviji..." "Prithviji!" "What are you doing here?" "I've risked My life to save you." " l Forgive you." " What?" "That's what you should tell Me." "'l forgive you'." "let's go home, there's lots to be done." "Prithviraj Raghuvanshi worships the truth." " And buries..." " Shut up!" "Ravi Shastri!" "You're an insult to a great cricketer." "Sania, you are My sister." "Radhika, you are My love." "Yet both of you are supporting him?" "Shut up!" "You too!" "If Aurangzeb's grandmother were alive today... even she would call you 'elder sister'!" "Shut up!" "listen..." "No, Prithviji!" "Today you will listen to Me." "If you had broken the lock of a Mosque... would you say you are Prithviraj?" "No!" "You know what you'd say?" "My name is Parvez Musharraf!" "That's what you would say." "If in a ring filled with wrestlers, you ask questions like..." "'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire'... anybody would be scared for their life!" "This is not fair, Prithviji!" "You want to observe a fast for Mother, do it!" "But why did you have to come home?" "A child takes nine Months to come into this world." "But I was so afraid of you that... I came up with three Mothers in one day!" "This is not fair, Prithviji!" "You not only gave Me ajob... you also gave My brother ajob!" "This is not fair, Prithviji!" "I fell in love with your sister." "I did!" "But you also fell in love with My sister." "But I will die tommy's death?" "This is not fair, Prithviji!" "Brother!" "Can I bare My heart out to you?" "At work, I didn't cheat you, not even for a rupee!" "I thought... if I continue working honestly... neither will Allah take offence, nor will lord ram." "But if you still think I aM wrong... I... I will jump from here." "It is better to die than to lie, Prithviji!" "I aM going, okay!" "Don't try to stop Me, please!" "Don't stop Me!" "Don't hold My hand, okay?" "Don't hold My hand!" "Prithviji!" "Prithviji, don't let go of Me!" "Don't let go of My hand!" "I will fall!" "Prithviji!" "Prithviji!" "Don't let go of My hand or I'll die!" "Now do you see... where a bundle of lies leads a person to?" "You believe in the almighty and now you would've been with him!" "Moreover, you called Me black?" "Black?" "You said..." ""Prithviji..." "Oh no!" "Never Mind, I forgive you." "Even if you bow before a stone, that stone becomes God... and if you say it from the heart, even stone-cold Prithvi Melts!" "I'll bare My heart to you." "I'M actually very proud of you." "I'M really very proud to have you." "My chest has become Blouse." "Prithviji!" "I will never ever lie again, Prithviji!" "But I want you to promise Me something... that you will never talk in English again!" " Please!" " What?" "Now pull Me up, please!" "I'M really scared." "Pull!"