"Translation by Danny Rochin Edit by Miyu Timing and Edit by Filip" "And after witnessing how a human being is able to take 38 litres of break liquid up the anus!" "I ask for applause!" "And now to current news." "Last saturday in Korea, a member of our community won for the 3rd time, the world championship of the Dancing Machine!" "I present you the great, the mythic, the invincible..." "Takahashi Yaaasuuu!" "Come, this way..." "Before we start, we would like to have a demonstration." "My manager didn't mention anything about this to me." "I'm afraid if you decline we wont get out of here alive." "Screw this." "We beg you!" "Go for it!" "That was incredible!" "You just won for the 3rd time." "Sorry, 4th time." "How are you holding up?" "I have the biggest depression in my life." "Why?" "Because there's no one in this world, who can beat me." "This looks very curious." "Hey, how do you play this?" "To make points, you have to step on those arrows as they light up, and the machine starts signing them." "Ah si?" "Que divertido." "Does it have any Julio Iglesias songs?" "It drives me crazy, especially if the kids are wearing tight clothes." "Look at how they sweat, I look to see how their t-shirts stick on their bodies." "How you can see their little muscles." "Ok let's go, come on move it!" "Is there a problem?" "It's missing one." "What the hell is the matter with you?" "Don't you see there's a lot of people in line?" "This gentleman is missing an egg." "Can you hear me?" "A guy in lane 5 is missing an egg." "I repeat this guy is missing an egg." "What are you looking at?" "Come on move it along." "They'll bring it for you." "Hey Dani come here." "You think you can stop by my house tonight?" "What for?" "Give it a blow dammit." "I pass Ritchie." "I'm in a hurry." "Fine kid." "I'm gonna show you somthing really beautiful." "Have you ever seen such a beautiful creature as this?" "I named it "Terminator"." "Well it sure is something, yeah." "But Ritchie I have to go really." "Come here and caress it, it likes it." "Touch it, it doesn't bite." "Dude!" "What the hell are you doing?" "Look Dani, you're holding in your hands the thing I love the most in this god damn world." "Don't worry I'm not a faggot." "I was in the army but i'm not a faggot." "If I did this, it was to show you just how important this animal is to me." "It's an albino boa from the amazon." "A quirk of nature, a unique specimen." "I've taken care of it since it was this big like it was my own son." "I've even stoped eating just to make sure it has everything it needs." "C'mon Ritchie it's just that I" "Look Dani, I have to go to Munich and take a course on the management of electric batons, and I want you to take care of "Terminator"." "Hey, don't you have a family?" "Look look,you live right next door, all you have to do is check the temperature, give it a hamster from the pet shop everyday." "Oh, and make sure it doesn't come out of it's tank, it had the habit of putting everything it finds in it's mouth, it's like a little kid." "Hey what's up dude." "It's awesome dude, awesome." "What is?" "Here's my solution." "It's a perfume with pheromones." "I bought it on the mail." "They advertise it on the paper "The smell of sex"." "I don't know, the pheromones have something that makes girls go crazy." "Have you tested it yet?" "No but..." "Look wanna try it out with those two?" "They look like they're really needy." "Come on dude, this may be the big day!" "Yeah man, this is the moment of truth." "You can do it man!" "Good luck!" "Look, look, look..." "Get out of here." "Thanks for letting me have your game." "What's wrong?" "Game over." "What the hell?" "It's stuck." "Hey!" "This piece of junk ate out euro." "Here's a coin, but please don't hit the machine, it's very delicate." "You can shove this up your ass." "I want MY euro." "I don't have the keys." "Oh yeah?" "Then who does?" "The manager." "Well thell him to come the fuck out, I want my euro." "He doesn't like to be bother with these things." "I'm sorry but it looks like you don't know who you're talking to." "I don't think he cares about that." "Look look, tell him to come out and while you're at it, give us some change." "Is there a problem here?" "We want change." "There's no change." "Oh really?" "Then what about that?" "Let me rephrase." "There's no change for you guys." "You'll give us change right now." "I'm not gonna say this twice, there's change for whoever I want." "Come on let's go, he's crazy." "Let's go." "Hey boys, there's a free game, I don't want it to go to waste." "Thanks Johnny." "Way to go Johnny." "You really scared them off." "Was that a Kung-fu attack?" "The martial arts have no secret before me boys." "I got my kung-fu black belt from non-other than Bruce Lee's master." "He used to tell me that" " Hey, it sure stinks huh?" "It's this guy." "Hey and have you been to China?" "Ha, "Have I been to China", when I was in the navy we landed in Hong Kong." "I managed to get away through the mountains with a few american ninjas, who were trying to perfect their skills with some of the masters over there." "We spent one whole year living in a monastery, feeding on roaches only, except on" "Christmas eve, when we found a religious mantis, we only drank our own urine." "Ew, your own?" "Not always." "Although that's another story." "Way to go Johnny." "So guys, what should we do now?" "C'mon Dani, We won't even touch anything, only the sofa the bed remains untouched." "Bed?" "Do we have plans or what?" "Well, I know these girls who are looking for some action, we're just missing a little love nest and our friend right here has one." "Come on man let me go with you." "Are they Hot?" "Should we head out now?" "It's not decided yet, this guy here is still think about it you know." "Come on dude, please, do it for me." "Hey kid!" "What's wrong?" "You're a virgin or what?" "Yes from this left arm." "Shit!" "Who took it out?" "What?" "The snake?" "I just opened it a bit, so it could get some air, the poor thing was fry in there." "No!" "We have to find it, come on!" "Move it!" "you have to help me." "Here pretty." "Here pretty." "How does it looks like?" "I don't know." "Where is it?" "Fuck!" "Hey guys come here, it's over here on the balcony." "Holly shit!" "I think it swallowed something." "But what did it ate?" "I think it's a gas tank." "It's not breathing guys, let's get it inside." "Quick." "Oh no!" "Same thing happened to my dog." "An albino boa?" "That's impossible, it's a very rare specimen it's priceless." "It's a matter of life or death." "How much?" "I don't know, in such a short period of time, I don't know maybe I can camouflage one in a soap truck but transportation is not the problem, you have to bribe a lot of people." "How much?" "I don't know, i guess i could manage to get it for....." "Three euros, three fucking euros." "What a scam." "Ten thousand euros man." "Even if I spent twenty years greasing bearings, we wouldn't even have enough to begin with." "Me neither, shit." "Hey why don't we look for an extra job." "Like what?" "I don't know, sperm donors, do you know how much they pay per liter?" "Hey." "Guys did you see this?" ""First national tournament of Dancing videogames"" "What else does it say?" ""The event will be held on February 15th"" "That's in 3 weeks." "Look here are the requirements." ""The teams must be conformed by a minimum of 4 elite players, the winning team will recieve a check for ten thousand euros" Dani!" "Hey that's awesome." "But come on guys, people from all over will show up for this, we wont stand a chance." "But we have all the records man." "A dance contest?" "Just like in the old days." "All the young people back then used to wear really tight clothes we would wear our pants so tight that we had to pull them down to fart." "Here, I wanna show you something." "What is this?" "A storage room?" "Before they brought in the games this used to be a disco club." "Look, look at this beauty, it was one of the best the "Penelope 5", it was founded by Johnny and his cousin Fernando who back then were really good." "This is huge huh?" "So did you dance?" "My thing was the singing but Johnny was the best." "I've never seen anyone move like him." "Before the accident he was #1, he was even a finalist at "Dancing Youth"" ""Youth" what?" ""Dancing"" "Gutierrez!" "What are you doing back here with the boys?" "It's not that Johnny." "I haven't touch them, I swear." "These guys are going to a dance contest and I wanted to show them these things." "Dance?" "Dacing died in 82, when John Travolta was forced to use colored tights and do "Staying Alive"." "Load of crap." "Damn Johnny you never told us anything, so you used to dance eh?" ""Did I use to dance", in the 70's if you didn't know how to dance or martial arts you were nobody." "That was a wonderful time, there were competitions everywhere." "And what happened?" ""The move" came boy, that damned "move"." "Hey and what about that "Dancing Youth"?" "It was the most important dance contest that ever was in Spain, it was during 1979." "Hello everyone at home, how are you doing?" "Good?" "Welcome to the big finale of "Dancing Youth"!" "Look at what moves we have here" "Fernando and I were the big thing back then, everyone loved us" "I was able to get to the finals, Fernando didn't." "But he was there with me, just like he had always been, cheering me on." "Perico Fernandez, Toro Rudo, even the brothers "Jaratraba"." "And what happened?" "Nothing, that was it." "Get out of here, move it!" "And see if we can get someone to throw this away, it's only collecting dust." "Argh what a mess, it's my fault for closing the pipe, looks like it's clogged." "Where the hell were you Johnny?" "Oh Fernando, what a surprise." "Oh gross!" "You've managed to make this place real gross." "It's the kids that have their way around here Fernando." "Arrange appointment for colon wash-up at the clinic." "Move it, have to pee." "But it's not clean yet" "Move." "You know Johnny, I'm a very busy man, I have a lot of business to attend, real business not like this dump." "Damn this stinks." "This week we've gone up Fernando, we got a new "zombie killing" machine up and running." "It seems like a hit." "Look Johnny, honestly I don't give a shit about this business." "You know what I could get out of this place in plane downtown?" "Hmm what are you gonna know." "I don't close this down just so you don't wind up in streets." "Oh god damn luck!" "What happened?" "My ring fell inside." "It's okay, I'll get it." "Nah!" "Leave it Johnny." "It's ok, really." "No no." "It looks like you're in luck, here it is." "Let me clean it up for you Fernando." "Thanks Johnny, you're a really nice guy." "Well I gotta run, I have a lot things to do." "And please get this cleaned, I don't want another call from the sanity department." "We'll have it cleaned first thing tomorrow." "Buy chocolate ice cream for tonight's dinner." "Who's that?" "That's Johnny's cousin, he comes by here very rarely, he's always in a hurry." "Hey look at that." "Hey." "Julito." "Hey brother what's up?" "Oh, you're on service?" "How's the Mrs.?" "Good, good." "Have the twins made their first communion yet?" "We're working on that." "I see you're as efficient as always." "Good service!" "Hey, wasn't that---?" "Hey come on." "Yes, it was His majesty, he comes often for a dentist apointment next door." "Hey what an hour to come to the dentist huh?" "So what?" "You're friends with the king?" "Who Carlos?" "Yeah but he's a freak, he has two pairs of balls." "Really?" "No, it's a figure of speech." "Those are the guys from special services, I worked with them years ago when I was in the army." "They called me up for that trouble at the american embassy in 76." "A really serious business." "But you were in the special services?" "Yes, but they would only call me for real delicate issues." "You see this watch?" "They gave it to me, they let me keep it as a reward after my last assignment." "They're really good people." "Now come on, I have to close up, there's a family waiting for me." "That BBQ sure smells good honey, if you keep treating me this well I'm gonna have to ask you to marry me again." "Hey I saw Fernando today, still as busy as always." "Hey there champ." "He needs some vacations." "... It could definitely end with world hunger" "Hey enough of these things, go get your sister, 'cause dinner's almost ready." "So the kids entered a dance competition, just like me in the old days." "The truth is those brats remind me of myself." "Not like this guy who spends all day watching TV." "Alright man, take care." "See you tomorrow." "Hey Dani." "It's about time, we've been waiting for you for a long time." "Who me?" "Yeah, we're Ritchie's cousins, you don't remember?" "It' was about time." "Oh Ritche's cousins!" "How are you doing?" "How are we?" "We are sitting, look..." "We just dropped by to take a look at our cousin's snake." "These guys haven't seen it." "He keeps saying it's awesome, a champion" "Hey, what hell is up with this guy?" "He kinda went mad after a fight in bar." "This guy bit a guy's tongue out and swallowed it." "That was like 3 months ago?" "Right guys?" "So you've got the apartment keys?" "Yeah, well no..." "The thing is I'm making a copy and I won't have it until next week." "One little week, it sure is nothing." "Fuck, they sure take long to copy a god damn key." "Alright buddy, I hope you're doing a good job here, you know that bug over there is Ritchie's whole life and we've told him "if someone lays a finger on it, even if it's just for fucking around, just call us up and we'll take care of it"" "Alright buddy?" "Damn guys, this dude has been here since 10 am." "But why?" "It said here clearly that auditions would be held at 10 pm." "Yeah, "10 prompt morning"" "Ok what's your name?" "Yeah, um, Salva." "Alright Salva, let's see what you can do." "Ok one thing, how far have you gotten?" "I started 3 years ago, and now I can pass AFRONOVA with 600,000 points." "How many members is the team?" "4 but we're missing 2 because I...." "I like your shirt." "Thanks." "You know what?" "Let's just leave it, we're still missing one member anyways" "Not again, you're just like in the beginning" "Hi!" "Am I late?" "Hello cutie, I'm Jose Miguel." "I'm Lara." "Pretty name." "Oh yeah, look, I can open my legs." "She looks flexy." "Well I can't make much points, but I have the Playstation and a metal pad at home and I practice everyday." "Don't worry we don't care about the points here." "Yeah they're not that important, no." "Then I'm in?" "Yes, of course." "Thank you, thank you very much..." ""THANK YOU FOR BEING WITH ME"" "Alright, where should we start?" "We have 3 weeks to go, what should we do?" "We could start by stretching." "Are you guys already warmed up?" "Yeah a little yeah..." "She's talking about the muscles, idiot." "Come on man, start it up." "Stomach down, until it hurts!" "Put that leg higher, it has to stretch." "Dancing is suffering, and whoever doesn't see it that way should get the hell out of here right now." "Keep your legs firm, loosen your ankles, keep your chin up, and smile!" "This isn't a funeral." "From now on for the next 20 days I will be your worst nightmare." "Don't be so stiff, move your arms, you look like a stick." "The body is just an instrument." "You have to feel the music, the music lies within us, touch your heart." "The other side man." "Alright, everybody please." "Can you hear it?" "It's going fast, it's a 2X4, we have to make that rhythm drop to our feet." "1,2... 1,2... 1,2... 1,2..." "This is crazy." "You know all the songs by heart, right?" "Yes." "Alright, you're only missing one thing." "What?" "Style." "And how do you learn that?" "You don't learn that, you're born with it." "But alright, I'm gonna try to rub some on you." "Hey Johnny but you used to dance to disco music right?" "Alright listen, what were you listening to before?" "It was a tango, a speed up tango." "A tango?" "Yeah, the dance is always the same, what changes are the trends." "You're gonna try boy." "No no no, I... can't." "What's wrong?" "Is he retarded?" "No no no, ask him on what hand he's wearing his watch." "In what hand are you wearing your watch boy?" "On the right one." "And where are your boots?" "Down." "He's uncapable of knowing the directions of the arrows, it's called "Laterality" or something like that." "This may have a solution." "Listen boy, concentrate and answer me as quick as you can without thinking." "What hand do you... touch yourself with?" "With both hands, it depends ..." "Well, it's okay." "You're gonna try it." "Wait wait wait, look, when you take your jacket off, you need to make that gesture mean something, look..." "Olivia is very special, you'll see." "You're about to step into one of the biggest temples of dancing." "Some of the biggest dancers in the world have come from here." "Dolurio, Rafael Ojeda, Giorgio Arezu, the "Gotchet" sisters, even Charlie Devolezu was here." "Giorgio Arezu?" "Who are those people?" "What do I know?" "No, 1 2 3, 1 2 3, 1 2 3..." "Hello, I'm Olivia." "And you know fame has a price, namely 60 euros per person." "Hello Olivia." "Johnny... but what..." "Johnny...." "You look like shit, you have a gross look." "You on the other hand, have not changed a bit." "Same attitude as always eh?" "I know that even if a 100 years passed you were still gonna come looking for me." "There was always something between us." "Yeah... a lot of smoke... you still smoking those cigars." "And you still keep bugging me about it." "You guys have no idea what this guy was with the girls back then." "Olivia, I need you to do me a favor, this gang of freaks need to learn how to shake their asses in very little time." "And we can't have the regular procedure." "We need "the old method"." "The old method?" "Are you sure?" "My ass looks fat!" "What are you talking about?" "It's perfect..." "Well I mean, it's alright..well forget it." "Hey look, this is Johnny." "Yeah and this must be his cousin Fernando." "And those girls?" "Totally, have you seen the hair?" "Such volume!" "Her name was Lola." "And who was she?" "Ah very nice girl, we were good friends..." "But anyways, let's forget about sentimental crap and let's begin, huh!" "Silence dammit!" "Keep you back straight, a lot of people have walked out of this academy..." "Some of them as great dancers" " Raise your chin up!" "... And others with their feet in front of them, so now you know, let's see..." "All right my babies, you better move like you mean it, otherwise you'll stop moving forever." "Come on!" "Move!" "Come on!" "Dance!" "Time to rest, tomorrow is the big day guys." "Come have a drink with us Johnny." "I would love to, but I have to close up and they're waiting for me at home." "And tomorrow I have to take my daughter to her eye doctor." "Come on, only this one time." "Yeah we'll drink in honor of your daughter." "Get out!" "Get off the stage!" "...." "Come on Jose it's your turn, come on sing!" "Hello." "It's really late, you know what time it is?" "No." "CAREFUL!" "Hey what's wrong man?" "This isn't a regular watch." "Yeah it's the one the guys from the secret service gave you." "You see this metal buttons here?" "Yeah." "They shoot 2 paralyzing darts." "They could knock out an african elephant in seconds." "So, what do you like to do on saturdays?" "You know, besides dancing." "Saturdays?" "Well I like to do a lot of stuff, I like to go to the comic book stores and read for free or ride on the trolley and see if I meet someone." "Right." "Well I'm also a little special eh." "At least before more than now." "Hey we've been walking a lot now, are you sure this is on your way?" "Yeah sure." "We've been walking for more than 30km." "Well this is it." "Hey wow you live there?" "No that's where the Gohardas live." "I live over there." "Oh." "You want me to get you a taxi?" "No, look I better go walking, I like to walk that way I go through the steps." "See you tomorrow." "Dani, wait..." "Here..." ""YOU ARE SPECIAL"" "Thanks a lot." "I've been collecting them for years, I really like them." "Alright then..." "We did really good today really." "See you tomorrow." "See you tomorrow Dani." "Yeah who is it?" "Oh hi, what a surprise!" "Well here we are..." "Hey!" "Pac-man, ghost eater..." "This one is from my time." "Well now we have to sign up, but where?" "Hey do you know where the KONAMI stand is?" "That way." "Ok, come on." "Good morning miss." "We are "The new park tigers"" "Did you send the form via internet?" "Yeah yeah." "Yeah, here it is, the signed up contestants are "Daniel Lopez", "Jose Miguel Rios"," "Salvador Carrasco" and "Lara Sonceles Jimenez de la Riva y Domek vega de Arakauge"" "Yes that's me." "And as reserve player "Oscar Aculo"." ""Aculo"? "Oscar Aculo"?" "Shut up douchebags nobody can choose their own name." "Is that really your name?" "Well are you "Oscar Aculo Prieto" or not?" ""PRIETO"? "ACULO PRIETO"?" "It makes sense that he doesn't show up at school." "Alright, here's the form, the other contestants are over there." "Sons of bitches." "I think those are really expressive last names." "Come on, this way." "Damn!" "So many people, it looks like they know how to dance." "Yeah, I told you guys, told you." "And they have style." "Well so do we." ""Contestants for the "Dance Machine" Contest please be ready in 5 minutes, I repeat 5 minutes"" "Well, fuck, I can't even breath in this thing." "Same here." "That damn Gutierrez." "Well I like how it feels." "This way guys." ""The new park tigers"?" "Here we are." "Ok, you have to have a minimum of 40,000 points between the 4 of you to get through to the next round." "Who's going first?" "You do it, remember, you just have to make points now, reserve your strength for the real competition." "Ready?" "Me?" "Well they say not a lot." "The universe is huge, oh great god of the moon, who lights the path to the garden where the 7 keys of wisdom are hidden" "Sorry brother." "Sorry." "Hello?" "Fernando is that you?" "God dammit, how many times do I have to tell you this number is only for life or death situations you idiot." "Fernando I'm just calling you because I wish you could see this, it's incredible you have no idea how this kids dance, and everyone is seeing the name of the arcade in the t-shirts" "Go shove it up your ass." "Hello?" "Fernando?" "You there?" "Guys will be here in a minute, I was changing, something wrong?" "No nothing." "Everything is alright." "It was incredible man, a real treat, she had no limit." "Well did something happen or not?" "Yeah!" "I don't know I mean, I called her and she was screaming for it so I just did her a favor, you should've seen how happy she was." "Girls from catholic schools are the horniest." "What is he talking about?" "Some girl he slept with." "Yeah, but who?" "Who else?" "Lara." "So at what time?" "Whatever I called her and" "Son of a bitch!" "I'm gonna kill you!" "Oh yeah?" "You and how many?" "Hey!" "What's going on here?" "Let me go dammit!" "Hey relax man, we're a team." "A team?" "Look at you, you're just a gang freakshows." "You have no future here or anywhere else." "I pass." "What's wrong son?" "I've been looking all over for you for like an hour." "I can't do it." "Oscar it's all in your hands now you can't let us down." "Look man I only came here as a reserve to give a little fun mood if I dance we're done for, I can't tell between the right point or the left point." "I'm just a kid." "Alright, I understand, don't torture yourself it's not your fault." "I'm gonna go tell the others." "By the way, how do it get back?" "This is a maze." "Over there to the left." "Left..." "left" "What is he doing?" "Dancing in reverse?" "I did it man I did it!" "That was brutal man!" "He couldn't tell direction because his head has backwards, we just had to spin it around." "But how did you find out?" "I don't know, ask Johnny he's a genius, a damn genius." "Well, I never told anybody but a long time ago, I passed the test to be on the NASA, to become an astronaut" "Are you having a good time?" "YEAAAAAAAAHH!" "Good good." "Well as you know this morning was the playoffs but now the real competition begins, and not only will the score count but our selected judges--- a big applause please!" "Will also judge the originality and style of the contestants so let's get this party started, but before that, a big round of applause for my girls please!" "They sure can move, but they aren't scoring any points." "We're in the finals!" "Yeah!" "You did it, you did it guys!" "Now, let's rest, tomorrow is gonna be a tough day." "Damn!" "That bitch sure can bend eh?" "What about those guys?" "Their uniforms are cool." "Mind your own business guys, don't even look at them." "Good morning." "Hey, who are those people?" "It's the official team of the company who makes the dance machines, they make a special team with the best players in every country." "They dedicate it so much hours, that hey don't even speak anymore, they communicate with dance moves." "Yeah, they're not that bad." "Come on guys you'll get cold, come on!" "It's "Jose Mi"!" "What's he doing here?" "I'm gonna kill him." "I can't believe it." "Son of a bitch." "Easy, calm down son, easy." "Don't waste your energy on this." "If you wanna hurt him, do it by dancing." "Come on, let's continue with our stretches." "Son of a..." "Dani, Dani, come on..." "Why don't you go outside and talk a walk so you can relax?" "Come on." "Ask what is botox." "Fernando, I'm rally happy you came." "You should see how these kids dance, besides if we win this, there's gonna be advertising of our business on all video game magazines." "Wow, you're really happy this huh Johnny?" "Yeah, it's like being a kid again, like starting over..." "Get waxing." ""Starting over"?" "It's been years since I've seen you like this Johnny." "Well, since the day it happened..." "Fernando, don't think I've forgotten, but I think I have a right to live on..." "Are you serious?" "That pig didn't flush the toilet." "It happened again Johnny, my ring fell in the toilet again." "I'll get it..." "No, no, no, no, don't worry about it." "Don't mention it..." "What the fuck are you doing Johnny?" "Don't do it." "I saw him dropping the ring on purpose." "Who is the little brat?" "Fernando, I'd like you to meet Dani." "Johnny how can you sink so low with everything you've been?" "Everything you've been?" "That's funny, the kids see you as a winner, they think you're somebody." "This man won the "Dancing Youth" contest in 1970." "Hey I didn't exactly say that" "Ah, so you told them you won." "Why don't you tell them the truth Johnny?" "Or should I do it?" "What truth?" "The only truth kid." "Yeah, Johnny go to the finals but..." "Johnny and Lola started off great, they were good, really good..." "But something happened, right Johnny?" "Johnny did something stupid, he risked too much..." "And that killed her?" "No, that didn't kill her..." "So THAT killed her then." "No, that didn't kill her either." "So THAT killed her then?" "Alright stop it!" "I killed her, it was my fault." "Now let's head back..." "Lola was my girl, we were gonna get married the next day." "Well this was a very long time ago, ever since then Johnny has had a great life and you can't always be reminding him of that incident." "Close the tap I left running 3 years ago." "Johnny did a lot of things?" "I bet he told you one of his Chinese tales." "Look kid, all Johnny has ever done in life is fail, he's a big phony when he starts off with his fantasies, he loses his head." "I've sometimes thought about sending him to a clinic, but he's like a brother to me." "Attention, attention please!" "Here's the moment you've all been waiting for." "This check over here for none other than ten thousand euros will be awarded to one of the 2 teams that have made it this far." "First we have a team that, well, hasn't stand out for it's looks but they've demonstrated to be great players, and they are the "New park tigers"!" "Alright, on the other hand we have the "super street dancers"." "You guys are going first, ready?" "Come on guys!" "We got a great choreography for this moment, it's our secret weapon and it can't fail us." "It can't be!" "He's dead!" "This is repulsive!" "They're not so bad, it kinda looks like our choreography." "It IS our choreography!" "They've stole it." "What are we gonna do man?" "We have to do something?" "I know, I think I got it." "In 1982 when I was in charge of the security in Bonia, the captain of the Poland national team...football." "Come on, we're in trouble, they stole our choreography yes, but we have to do something." "When I was a little girl and I fell off the pony, I would tell Braulio, my butler, to put me back on, and I kept doing that until I learned." "What I mean is that we have to get up there and dance and have a good time, let's do it." "Well, I don't like this one bit..." "What's going on?" "Attention please, I've been informed that right now both teams have the exact amount of points." "It was planned that we would hold the individual finals, but, there is a last minute surprise." "Due to the success of this event, KONAMI have decided to make this contest more exciting." "Daniel Lopez, solo dancer of the "New parks", will compete with the solo dancer of the "Super street dancers"" "None other than super world champion of the Dance machine, Yasu Takahasi!" "This event will be held in 7 days at the "Ocion Center" Thank you." "No no!" "I object, I'm afraid this asian guy did not sign up for this." "I'm afraid we have no choice, it was the boss' decision." "I want to see the form, the sign up form..." "Here it is..." "Even a blind man can see this, this was added after man..." "They even set the date back." "You guys have no idea who I am, I plan to the international federation." "I'm sorry sir, but we are the national federation." "This is disgusting!" "It's not fair, it's not fair!" "Easy Johnny, we can't do anything about it, it's their say now." "I'm out of here!" "." "Come on, you can take on that guy and any other guy!" "Dani..." "Leave me alone!" "I pass." "Why do you think they make you put the products about to expire on the middle stand?" "I don't know and I don't care." "Why do you think you place this products around less colored products, or in places where the music is more enjoyable?" "So they'll sell better?" "Exactly, people think they choose, but they only choose what they want them to choose." "Us regular people can almost never get to choose Dani." "And what do I care?" "You ARE able to choose!" "This time you can stand out from the rest and really prove you're somebody." "It's obvious you haven't seen videos of that guy, I don't stand a chance Johnny." "It's better if we just leave it okay?" "And yes, I'm scared to lose, I don't wanna be a fucking loser like" "Like me." "Well yeah, like you, and if I don't dance against that asian I might never find out and you think it's better that way." "Yeah yeah, it might be better that way." "Hello boy." "We've been wanting to see you stud." "HEY!" "Don't move!" "Who's this guy?" "Leave him alone, don't you see he's a poor bastard?" "Now we're all here eh?" "What you've done to Ritchie's pet has no name, it's despicable, but you did good in the tournament eh?" "Now you have a chance to win and buy Ritchie another snake, that way you can avoid him a bad experience huh?" "You're gonna get it right?" "I don't stand a chance dammit!" "We just came to let you know what you're worth a lot and you're very special." "That's..." "That's what I was saying." "It's amazing, look, it's almost as if he's not touching the platform." "Yes." "We have to admit that he sure can move." "Oh my god!" "What's wrong?" "Sebu, sebu sebu!" "What are they saying?" "What are they saying!" "?" ""Sebu" is the dance of death." "And who are those guys." "They are monks from the Shaolin temple, the creators of martial arts." "Yasu Takahashi uses shaolin discipline, that's why Yasu is the only player capable of completing the dance of death." "But what is this "Death Dance"?" "We thought it was a legend, but now I see it's true." "It's the machine's harder level." "No one in Europe has been able to reach it because, to do so you have to clear every songs with 100,000 points." "For that..." "For that what?" "For that you have to be a god." "Come on Gutierrez it has to be hidden behind the last level." "You almost got it." "There it is!" "The Death Dance." "Come on Dani, you can do it." "Come on Gutierrez." "Wait Dani are you sure?" "Do it." "Dani!" "Are you alright." "I had it I had it, but it's crazy." "We all know I don't stand a chance." "Yes of course you do, you only have one advantage and you have to use it." "Oh yeah?" "What is it?" "The "Tiger Eye"" "What do you think?" "You see that expression in his eyes." "When we fought I didn't have that expression in my eyes, but you did and you won, you have to get it again Rocky, the Tiger eye my friend, the Tiger eye." "Mythic!" "It's the eye of hunger, you can't lose anything because you live on the street and don't have anything, he has no hunger because he's the best, but he can lose it all because he lost the Eye of the Tiger." "Dani, if winning means dying then we'll die!" "We must have no fear or regret, if to them this is gonna be hell, for us it'll be like home." "Is that from Rocky too?" "No, that's from Rambo III." "At least I tried, it didn't turn out good but at least I tried." "If I hadn't been there I would've been miserable for the rest of my life." "If you want something in life you have to fight for it." "You have to really try otherwise you'll never know." "I know, but maybe everyone is right and I'm afraid to lose, what do you want me to do?" "For starters you have to ask yourself some questions." "To dance like that chinese guy" "He's japanese." "Well, whatever --- you have to concentrate and find the force within you." "Is that from Star Wars?" "I'm being serious Dani dammit!" "The first and most important thing to know is "Why do you dance?"" "So they wont break my legs." "I don't mean now, but when you first started." "You have to know, if you don't, you'll never be invincible." "Karate kid right?" "Don't take me the wrong way Johnny but... to beat that bastard we need more than cheap philosophy from cheap movies." "That philosophy from cheat movies helps people Dani, because people don't live big and interesting lives." "People live cheap lives." "Look I was thinking, to get what we really want, one must really fight for it without being afraid to lose, so I wanted to tell you I like you a lot, and you sleeping with that idiot is not that important, here I bought you this...." "Thanks a lot, I love plush toys, and about the sex thing, I rather get to know you a little slower first eh?" "Really, Jose is not the kind of boy I like, I actually don't like him at all." "but he insisted and I got curious." "Besides, we were only together for a little bit." "This is pathetic just leave it." "Here, this is for you. "I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOUR FEELINGS"" "Are there cards for everything?" "Really, I never had the opportunity until now." "Give me a break, a girl like you..." "Dani listen to me, I've actually never been like this." "I've been like this for a little while, I was... very different." "I weighed 130kg, I would just sit around home eating and never go out because I was embarrassed of people seeing me, until someone bought the game and the pad for the dance machine, it was incredible because i got up and started dancing and dancing like crazy." "I danced and danced and kept dancing until my body started changing, the dance machine is the only video game that helps you lose weight." "It changed my life." "One day I went shopping and saw your sign, so I went to the audition." "That night you walked me home was the first time I was alone with a boy and I liked it a lot." "Are you gonna be with me in the finals?" "The finals!" "I found something out Dani." "My dad belongs to some kind of club where Fernando goes, Johnny's cousin." "Well the other day he told my dad that it was his idea to bring the japanese guy here, he bought the whole organization and has fixed everything, even the place where the finals will be at, he owns that place." "That fucker can't stand us winning." "We have to tell Johnny." "Do you know where he lives?" "Have you found out already?" "I've known for years, it's horrible isn't it?" "Years?" "But what is it that you know?" "That thing at the "Dancing Youth"" "You mean the accident?" ""Accident" that was no accident." "Johnny always though it was his fault but it wasn't actually like that." "What happened then?" "Before he went on stage, Fernando gave Johnny a strong handshake." "Invest on oil." "Johnny, gimme those 5 eh?" "Come on, show them you guys are the best." "I was surprised because he'd never been too effusive." "Years later I understood why he did it." ""Sodium sulphate with paraffine", a classic, it's a very string lubricant." "That's what made Lola's hand slip, then I saw him do it in later competitions." "Fuck." "But why did he do it?" "That same night before they went out on stage, I was talking to Lola, we were good friends she was Johnny's dance partner but was actually Fernando's girlfriend..." "That night she confessed to me she was in love with Johnny, she said he was way more fun and had a bigger penis and she was going to leave Fernando as soon as the finals were over." "Fernando sure knew about it, so instead of taking the embarrassment he caused the accident." "Surely he did it to make Johnny look like an idiot, but it went too far." "How did you guys find out?" "Man, doorbell doesn't work." "Are you sure this is the place?" "Johnny open up it's us!" "And if we call on the guest door?" "We don't have that on the 3rd world." "Oh, but there is little squirrels like in my garden..." "Those aren't squirrels, they're rats." "The door opened, what should we do?" "I don't know." "Come on let's go in." "Johnny?" "Johnny?" "These are plastic, see?" "." "A stuffed dog." "Oh damn!" "Who's there!" "?" "Hold this on your head, it'll make you feel better." "You don't have a family?" "I live alone.." "I don't have anyone." "Well I have Fernando, he always cared for me..." "Years ago I had a different lifestyle you know..." "Dances, trips, missions... until what happened with my leg." "You hurt it in combat." "No, a tractor hit me and took off." "Fernando gave me a job and has taken care of me." "He's all I got, well and you guys." "You're like my family." "Johnny we came here to tell that..." "To tell you we'll never let you down." "Thank you, thank you guys." "It sure is crowded." "I've been here before, this is one of Fernando's business," "I'm gonna go ask where we have to be." "Poor man, I feel kinda sorry for him." "Look there's people from all over, some of them have been here for days." "Guys there's our apparel." "Yasu!" "Yasu!" "Yeah!" "Yasu!" "..." ""I thought I made it clear I didn't want to make contact with people!"" ""We've prepared a dressing room where no one will bother you"" ""I hope it has Crab sticks and " "Come on, let's go, let's go." "Damn, those bastards." "This is gross." "It stinks in here, what do we do?" "We have no choice but to be here, they'll call us out in 15 minutes." "Dani you're too tense, you have to relax a little." "You can only think of one thing now, the Tiger Eye, I wanna see it in you're eyes when you go out there got it?" "What's going on out there?" "Oh fuck!" "..." "Five minutes." "Come on, I think it's this way." "Gah!" "What a smell." "Gross." "How's everything here?" "They're even making bets out there, but I think they're just gonna give the money back." "Why?" "Because the bets are 200 to 1, that you lose of course." "Well I bet for Dani." "He's the "1"" "You're the only one who thinks I might win." "Well, did you bring it?" "Yeah." "Here this is for you, we all bought for you." "Wow, this is awesome." "I actually did it myself." "It's great." "Hello." "Man this place smells." "What is it?" "I have the animal outside in the truck, but if there's no money then there's no deal." "We paid this dude some of the money, you can execute your plan on time." "One more thing, I only managed to find one wild specimen, it's not domesticated." "You have to be very careful with it." "Okay okay." "Oh Dani, something else, there's someone who has worked extra hours to get the money." "Those gurls sure can move eh." "Damn it stinks in here." "I'm really sorry about what happened man, I'm a stupid idiot, the truth is that night we were up playing" "Playing what?" "Escalestre!" "(Some spanish game) We played for 2 fucking hours, okay." "Escaleste?" "Damn you're pathetic man." "You see?" "We're friends til' death or not?" "Friends til' death." "What's up guys, are you ready?" "Damn Johnny what's that?" "It's perfect isn't it?" "It's an exact replica of the one John Travolta used on "Saturday night Fever"." "I won it from Travolta's double in a poker match in Santo Domingo." "Wow, it's cool." "Come on guys, this is it." "Are we gonna win?" "YEAH!" "Follow me on my signal." "Good luck Dani!" "You can do it Dani!" "It's now or never." " KONAMI and Ocion Center have the pleasure of presenting one of the most incredible events" "Now I know Johnny..." "What?" "I know why I dance, I know why I do it." "Why?" "When I started I did to have fun with my friends." "And?" "That's it, I do it have fun, and if they're not with me this isn't worth anything." "Yes, there he is!" "The aspirant for the title of "Wold Champion of the Dance Machine" Daniel Lopez a.k.a "The Killer Tiger"!" "Dani, from here you're on your own, so go out and have fun." "And now, from Tokyo, Japan, none other than the universal champion of the dance machine the legendary, the mythic the one, the only Yasu Takahashi !" "What a Jerk!" "Hey Dani, come here." "What's up." "You can't let that slip, tell him something anything!" "What the hell do I say?" "Hey you, you speak Japanese?" "Yes a little, I Chinese." "You're gonna shit yourself motherfucker." "What happened?" "What an idiot, he told him he has deep respect for his family and ancestors." "Dammit." "Attention, attention please, the winner will be the one who makes the most points in the general score from 3 songs chosen at random at the machine's menu." "Our sponsor will give the winner this check for then thousand euros." "Girls, thank you." "And now let the competition begin!" "Go ahead." "Come on Dani!" "Keep it up." "He's a dancing machine." "Give him some air." "That guy isn't human, look at him!" "Dani..." "You can do it, come on." "Come on, you got him!" "You did it man you did it!" "You only have one more to go." "Ladies and gentlemen this is incredible, they have once again tied with the maximum score!" "He's looking at you eh, he's chicken shit." "Ok, now our judge will make the machine select one more song at random within the AAA level." "Shit!" "The death dance." "Damn, it's all over." "Bastards!" "Dani calm down, come on." "You can't break down now." "I've tried, I've tried it a thousand times and I can't even make it half way." "Besides he knows it, he knows he's the only one in the world who can do it." "That's stupid, you have to get that out of your head all you have to remember is what I told you." "Fernando..." "Everything alright here?" "Excellent." "What's wrong, is he feeling sick?" "I'm glad you came have you seen him?" "The kid has been dancing great, he's just nervous that's all." "The guy needs a drink Johnny, and as long as you're dressed as a waiter, why don't you go get him one?" "You're right, I'll do it right away." "How gross." "Look, I'm gonna tell you something, your name is Dani right?" "You know why I've been successful in life Dani?" "Because I always make safe bets." "Honestly I've staged all of this so you'll lose, so I wouldn't want you to go out there and do a good job you know." "You son of a bitch." "Ask my mother for a DNA test." "You see that?" "No, no, that over there." "Wow, someone dropped a check filled out to "Cash" for ten thousand euros." "What a coincidence, ten thousand euros, just what you need to get out of that trouble you have with someone right?" "How do you know about that?" "I know everything, I like to be informed." "Alright kid, I'll see you out there, you know what you have to do, if you never try you'll live your life not knowing you're a loser, and it'll be better that way." "See you always Dani." "Shove this up you ass, I'd rather be a sore loser like Johnny, than a stinking rat like you." "I see you haven't learned anything, I told you I always play safe bets." "I think this kid will suffer a fracture that wont allow him to keep dancing." "Hey!" "What's going on here!" "?" "They're gonna brake my legs Johnny, he can't stand you winning." "That's not possible right Fernando?" "Why would you do something like this?" "Because he hates you Johnny, he cause the accident at "Dancing Youth"" "Enough jokes, let the kid go." "How can you be so stupid Johnny?" "he's right." "Who do you think hired the guy in the tractor that ran you over?" "Yes... yes you're kidding." "I'm not kidding, I killed Lola." "It's true!" "Let the kid go." "Take care of him too, he's still got a good leg." "Hold on!" "How clumsy of me, this always happens, Johnny, do you mind if you pick it up?" "I'm kinda grossed by it actually." "Release him." "Don't do it Johnny." "It worked, they're paralyzing darts." "Johnny, don't get this conversation out of context." "I just want to know something Fernando, why?" "Why?" "Why?" "Because I could never stand you!" "You were a better dancer, you got the better women, you had the better hairstyles and to top all you had a bigger penis!" "And also that exciting life of yours, filled with special missions I couldn't stand it Johnny after all, I'm human, you gotta understand." "So it was true!" "You're not human Fernando, you're a rat!" "Johnny!" "Johnny!" "what are you doing?" "Johnny!" "Ready?" "What's up?" "I've never seen him this way." "Its the eye of the tiger." "I don't know how that's gonna fit through the banks window." "And what are you gonna do with all this money you won, eh dude?" "I'm gonna open a business with a friend..." "A "Tight clothes" store." "That's right, very tight clothes." "He says he recognizes your talent and it was an honor dancing beside you." "Wow, tell him he was alright." "He says he's grateful you help Yasu be less arrogant and that humility is something very important to be a champion." "Alright, maybe another day we can play another round but on friendlier basis alright bud?" "Johnny you speak Japanese?" "Well, I never told you this story but I worked 2 years at an asian restaurant." "Olivia!" "Dani, you've demonstrated to be a great guy, and not just by winning the contest, but for forgiving Lara that night." "This things are only important of you want them to be." "I'm glad you think that way because what we had was just sex, besides she was thinking of you the whole time." "You see, a lot of things happened that night, after playing with Jose Mi, Oscar called me, he was feeling lonely." "What?" "Dani, you're a great guy, and a great personality, but now I have to go, right girls?" "Yeah!" "Where's the bus?" "Right there to the right." "Ok, so you're not angry?" "Cause I have a card for you." ""KISS ME ALREADY YOU IDIOT"" "Hey boys look look look..." "Damn man, you've done an excellent job, she's even bigger, it's like a whole other snake here hold it." "If it wasn't because I picked it out with my own hands I'd say it has the pigmentation of a male." "Johnny!" ""Mad dog"" "It has been great man, you destroyed them." "You're still that skilled rat I knew when we were dragging on mud in Kuwait huh?" "What are you doing here?" "Are you in service?" "Well, your majesty is here shopping and saw this whole thing, and the truth is he didn't miss a thing from this duel." "Your majesty!" "Hello Dani, I'm very proud and happy to tell you that I was very excited watching you dance." "No sweat." "Wow I love exotic animals, can I hold it?" "Hold it?" "You go." "Now we really fucked up!"